{"id": "t3_o08yr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you get someone out of your head?", "post": "Hi,\nI'm 22, and I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years now. We recently moved together. We've always loved each other intensely.\n\nProblem, I recently started to have feelings for an other person (a friend). This person has had a boyfriend for now 3 years, and has absolutely no ideas. Those feelings were so strong, it was hard to hide them. After 2 months of me being distant and really sad, my girlfriend forced me to say what was bothering me. I'm not a good liar, and now she knows.\n\nWe decided to give us a week alone, I went to my parents. \n\nNow, I'm completely lost. I keep on thinking about this person, and I hate that. I would like for those feelings to go away, to leave me alone. But I can't.  \n\nWhat do I do? It's been 3 months now, and I'm just desperate.", "summary": "long relationship; fell in love with an other person; admitted it; would like it to disappear, though it doesn't."}
{"id": "t3_15ijah", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "So, my mom woke me up with a loud TV.", "post": "She was in her living room, watching TV. This was at about 8:30 in the morning, and she was exercising. She turned the TV up extra loud to hear it over her excercycle, and woke me up. I went in there asking for her to turn it down. She said she didn't have to; I explained that I always used headphones so she didn't have to deal with my noise and that she should give me a little more respect, given that I paid rent at the time.\n\nShe disagreed. I went back to my room, rather pissed off at the lack of equality. I had no lock on my door; but I had a dresser right next to it, so I pulled one of the drawers out enough so that it caused the door to not be openable. Then, I turned my speakers up really loud and blasted Gangnam Style on repeat, with the bass cranked up as high as it could go.\n\nIf you hate Gangnam Style for being overplayed, you will see why I chose that particular song. I personally don't mind it. But here's the thing about my bass; it vibrates the walls, making one hell of a lot of noise. Needless to say, my mom was not pleased and shut off the internet. But it was oh so worth it.", "summary": "Mom had the TV on loud and woke me up, didn't care that I'd respected audio levels in the house, so I countered with playing Gangnam Style on repeat with the bass thumping through the walls."}
{"id": "t3_3r7dag", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend (20f) of two years cheated on me (20m) by kissing two guys at a Halloween party.", "post": "Lately her and I have been having a few problems, and these problems have been brought up before a few times. One problem being that I don't show enough affection. I don't tell her she's pretty very often or don't compliment her much. I feel terrible about it, but this time I was really trying to change for her.\n\nFor Halloween she went to visit her step brother at a college and I got drunk with my friends and watched movies. Last night (11/1) we got in a huge fight about me not changing and how our relationship won't work out and basically broke up over the phone. So in an effort to try and fix it I drove to her house. She told me how at the parties she went to that two guys kissed her. The first one she pushed away, but the second one I asked her if she kissed him back and she said yes and that she did it because it made her feel wanted, which I guess I haven't been making her feel that way lately. We cried, we talked about everything, we had great sex, and I stayed over at her house just to sleep with her and then snuck out in the morning so her parents wouldn't know.\n\nWe both obviously want to work things out but aren't sure if we should. I love this girl, but the more I think about it, all I can think about is her cheating on me, and more importantly, liking it. It makes me sick to my stomach. Should I even try to fix it or would I be better off cutting all ties.", "summary": "My girlfriend kissed two guys at a Halloween party and liked it. We love each other but don't know what to do about it."}
{"id": "t3_2wghd6", "subreddit": "running", "title": "One year post-pregnancy, aches and pains in hips and knees, can't even comfortably do day 1 of C25k. Help?", "post": "I'll try to keep this short!\n\n**Background**\n\n* I've always been an on again/off again (very casual!) jogger, typically doing 3 - 5 k\n* My knees have always been finicky, and I went to a physio who thought I had \"runner's knee\"\n* Pre-pregnancy, my \"runner's knee\" would flare up when I got to the 8 - 10 k distance range, even if I had a decent base (doing a C210k type program)\n\n**Current Problem**\n\nI had my baby a year ago, so all in all I haven't run for about 1.5 years.  I'm quite slim and have been doing aerobics-style classes for the past year, so I'm not totally out of shape.  Body weight exercises, aerobics, bikes and ellipticals are all fine.  However, when I run even the tinyiest bit, or even go on a long walk or a hike, my pelvis gets very sore and tight, and my knees start hurting very quickly.  I already am doing general squats/lunges/stretching type things.  \n\nI'm starting to feel like running just isn't for me anymore. Which is a bummer, because I really enjoy running!\n\nHas anyone had something similar? Can anyone recommend some stretches or exercises that might help?  Should I see a Dr?  Or should I just see a physio?  Not quite sure how to proceed.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "I think pregnancy messed with my body, now I can't even run even the smallest amount without pain in my pelvis and knees.  I'm fairly certain the problem isn't just that I'm completely out of shape."}
{"id": "t3_2wm48l", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting scared for no reason and peeing on myself", "post": "(Pre-apology for formatting errors since i'm on my phone)\n\nWell, this was embarrassing and happened a few minutes ago. \nI work at a small law office which shares a building with a few other businesses, a dentist's office and a military recruitment center. There is no drinking fountain in the building, so I bring a giant 2L water bottle which I sip on all day to keep hydrated and counteract all the copious amounts of alcohol i drink (after work, of course). Unfortunately, I have been cursed with a small bladder, and have to go pee sometimes 8-10 times a day. Luckily the back door of my office opens up right near the bathroom, so I can usually drain the main vein without embarrassing myself by being frequently seen there.\n\nAs I was wrapping up work for the day, I realized I would have to pee one more time before leaving. It was slightly after 5, so when I walked to the bathroom, I wasn't expecting to see anyone in there (it is the kind of bathroom with a urinal and a stall).\n\nFuckup begins when I open the door and there is a dude who had just finished shitting and was leaving the stall. For whatever reason this terrified me for a split second and I jumped and gasped. \n\nThe guy was amused and chuckled and was like, did I scare you? I muttered something like \"haha, yeah, a little bit\" and I kept my head down, beelined to the urinal and unleashed the krakan. \n\nI was super embarrassed and very preoccupied so I didn't notice that the bottom part of my untucked, button-down shirt had slipped into my urine stream and was getting soaked. I didn't realize it until it began to sort of soak back onto my pant leg and getting my thigh wet. \n\nWell, fuck, i thought. This sucks. Then i remembered my fiancee was coming to pick me up straight from work so we could go grocery shopping. I cleaned up as best as i could, but its still very obvious. Luckily I have a P coat which is long enough to cover my pee-soaked netherregion, so i may get through this unscathed. My girl didn't notice yet...", "summary": "got startled for no reason by a normal dude taking a shit and then pissed on my pants and shirt due to embarrassment and now I have to go shopping in my shame-soaked pants."}
{"id": "t3_2t47de", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by staring too much.", "post": "Unlike most tifu's I have seen, this happened today. So, to start off I am 16 years old and have started my second semester as a sophomore, in one of my new classes (team sports to be specific) I noticed a very attractive and genuinely cute girl. I have never been on dates or been romantically involved with any girls before, because I have social anxiety and I am pretty chunky and I have confidence problems because of it. Any way, back to the story, I notice this cute girl and I can't help myself and I stare at her then I gain focus and I am focused back on the game. The day continues normally until I look back and her eyes avert away from me quickly, like when you get caught staring at someone and you act like you weren't staring. So, I thought \"does she like ME?!?\" thought it might have been a coincidence but I caught her stare a few more times. So after we dress back into our normal clothes I stare at her and question. whether or not she could like a person like me. She caught my gaze this time and she turns away and talks to some dude. The dude was pretty weird but there wasn't a day when she wasn't talking to him during class. Anyway the dude gives me a dirty look and the bell rings and I thought maybe she doesn't like me maybe she was creeped out and told her possible boyfriend that I was staring at her all class. So yeah saw her walking away with the dude and I saw her eyes on me again and they avert again. Don't know her name or anything so probably creeped out the poor girl and might get confronted by the dude, also I seem like a total creep...\nP.S. sorry for formatting on mobile.", "summary": "Creeped out a girl by staring too long/ too much, thought she might like me, boyfriend or friend or what evs might confront me. I am a huge creep."}
{"id": "t3_mjs4m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I think our family dog just consumed a significant amount of chocolate. What do I do?", "post": "Okay so my father and I went out to dinner tonight and left the dog at home. I'd left half a bar of dark chocolate (about 1.5 oz, still in the wrapper) sitting on my desk. Mind you, the bar has been sitting on the desk for about three days now and the dog hasn't done anything about it, and typically doesn't. She knows not to climb on surfaces and has shown no interest in the candy before. \n\nHowever, I returned home to find my bedroom in shambles. The contents of my desk were all knocked around and a bunch of family photos were all shredded and chewed up. I found the empty chocolate bar wrapper on the ground and still can't find the offending candy. I can only conclude that the dog has eaten it.\n\nThis is something that my dog would've done as a puppy. However, she's ten now and hasn't behaved like this in years. She's acting fine at the moment, but I'm still worried. My father doesn't seem concerned about her at all, which worries me even more.\nFYI, my dog is a dachshund mix and weighs about 25-30 pounds. \nHas anybody been in this situation before? What happened? Does anybody know what to do?", "summary": "I think dog got into chocolate when I was out. My dad isn't concerned but I'm afraid she's going to keel over and die and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4mcvz0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me and my (former) best friend.", "post": "I'm a 15-y.o. female, and I'm pretty sure that I just lost my long-time female best friend (a year older), who has been with me for about 4 years.\n\nI had only two friends in school, and 'she' was one of them. We never argued a lot, but there were very rare occurrences when we didn't get along. I had already been ignored for a week once--as if my presence wasn't there at all--and I always assumed it was simply because I had said something wrong (I apologise to her, I swear). But we would always get along, eventually.\n\nIn the remaining several days before we had to part for summer, our interactions were becoming a little awkward, and it was with the knowledge that I would already be attending a different school from hers when classes return. In those days, I would see her making conversations with other students rather than me. She would always speak to my only other best friend (the three of us have been really close friends for > 4 years), and not include me in the conversation. My online messages are all unread. I have, of course, asked her if I had done something wrong; she would say \"no\", as always, without looking me in the eye.\n\nAnd now she has finally blocked me in social media. 3 months have passed now, and I cannot even fathom what wrong I could have possibly done. I don't have much friends. Now that I am in a new university, I could simply forget that part of my past and move on, but I cannot bring myself to do so. You can't just forget years of shared experiences, right?\n \n\nHell, I even dream about her sometimes. I adore her as a great friend, no less. But in those last few days together, she'd just blatantly ignore me, and wouldn't at least tell me what I've done wrong--and that really hurts me. I'm rarely emotional, but look at me now.\n\nAny help at all would be strongly appreciated. If it's me who's at fault, do tell--I'm open. Apologies for the long post.", "summary": "I have lost a ~4-year-best friend of mine, who now chooses to ignore me, and I cannot even tell what I have done wrong."}
{"id": "t3_2zu9jn", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to creatively announce my first pregnancy.", "post": "This happened a couple months ago. My husband and I spend most of our time working in the overseas, and we recently came home to the U.S. for a year to apply for another long term visa. We decided that we should spend that year trying to have our first baby.\n\nWithin a week after making this decision, I realized I had missed my period. The next week I took three pregnancy tests at work, and that's right, my Mexican ass is knocked up. Instead of telling my husband right away, I came home from work and made a cookie cake that said \"I Got Knocked Up\" and a bunch of cupcakes with letters on it that, when unscrambled, say \"I am pregnant.\" \n\nHere's the FU part. Since we spend a lot of time overseas, we don't have many close friends, but we had a few people we had begun hanging out with and I invited them all over that night to play Settlers of Catan. When my husband got home that night, they were all there waiting with the board set up. I brought out the cupcakes I made and told them all to unscramble them. My husband stared at the cupcakes for a minute and said, \"I am pregnant.\" All our new friends were super excited, but my husband just sat there dumbstruck.\n\nFinally, one of our friends stopped and asked my husband, \"Dude, are you just finding this out right now? Ohhh Shit.\" My husband and I went into our room for about a half hour and he was pretty upset that he didn't know first and we didn't decide together how to tell people, and how he was put on the spot in front of practical strangers. But then we made up, cried, called our parents, and then rejoined our awkward guests for a game of Settlers.", "summary": "I surprised announced to my husband I was pregnant in front of a bunch of a people we really didn't know. Made him and everyone else feel really awkward."}
{"id": "t3_1xh19y", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Knee pain due to poor balance", "post": "I've had difficulty with distance running due to strong knee pain. My endurance is great, I can cycle for very long distances, but I can't run because my knees give out around 8 to 10 mies.\nI went to the Orthopedist who did a full series of x-rays and pronounced my knees in excellent condition. Then he had me do a bunch of balance exercises and told me that balance and \"hip stability\" was my issue. He prescribed PT, but my insurance is kinda crappy and 3x's/week PT will run me around $300/month. That's a bit steep.\nSo, has anyone else had knee issues due to balance and hip stability? What did you do? Are there balancing exercises I can do at home and not spend a ton of money on PT?", "summary": "Ortho said my knee pain was because I balance like a toddler, cost of PT is too damn high. Can you recommend a DIY balance program?"}
{"id": "t3_33k2x7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (18M) jealous of other guys flirting with my (18M) girlfriend on social media. Help?", "post": "My jealousy is starting to become a problem in this relationship. Actually, it has always been. Last year, a boy my girlfriend was friends with had kept walking her to class, writing her cute notes (something boyfriends do) and asking her if she's sure about being with me. I threatened to break up with her if she never stopped talking to this guy, because he was obviously trying to make a move. Now that she's in college, she's hanging out with more guys! 75% of her friends are guys, always hanging out with her, and after the \"friend\" she had last year, I can't stop being jealous or mad about her friends. The social media part about this, guys put heart eyes on her photos on instagram, and I tell them to back the fuck up, and my girlfriend gets mad at me for confronting them! \"You don't know what they meant by them, it doesn't mean they're flirting with me.\" I understand that she is right, she doesn't respond back but she obviously likes the attention she gets. My jealousy is also fueled by my friend group. My friends have dated my exes, I've been apart of closed door conversations about how some of my friends want to fuck my other friend's ex, visa versa. I would never do that to my friends, and in my world, most guys in college or highschool just want to take my girlfriend if they hang out with her. Or want to fuck her. She has already encountered a guy trying to flirt, and she gave him her number just to talk when we were arguing and on a break from our relationship. I have influenced her as well to be jealous with how i act with my anger and jealousy, but a big break up caused her to stop being clingy. Now i'm stuck being mad and jealous towards guys around her, and now I feel overprotective.", "summary": "I'm a jealous boyfriend and I need help to understand how NOT to be jealous. I don't want the \"Oh you should feel LUCKY guys want her!\" FUCK THAT. "}
{"id": "t3_36g84g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 F] want to buy my bf [28 M] of 6 months a $500 very rare video game for his collection for his birthday/Christmas. Will a gift of this caliber scare him off/ be considered too much after being laid off from his game dev job?", "post": "My boyfriend's birthday is December 24th, which is Christmas Eve. He grew up in a foster home and never got great presents for either his birthday or Christmas. He often spends his birthday and Christmas alone because his foster mother is uninterested and he doesn't have a great relationship with his birth mother. \n\nHe spent Christmas with me last year, so I went out of my way to get him both a birthday present AND a Christmas present, both of which valued above $50. However, he was so thrilled to have someone to spend his birthday and Christmas with, he showered me with 5 very nice, expensive gifts. I felt terrible. Happy, but terrible.\n\nHe is a video game artist but was recently laid off from his job. He is very passionate about his video game collection. There is one game I noticed in his collection that he only has the sequel of. I asked him why because it is very unlike him. He said it was because the original was wildly expensive and he already had a hard time affording a mint condition version of the sequel.\n\nThe cheapest, mint condition version of the game I could find is about $500. I do not make a whole ton of money, but I have saved up enough for it but now I find myself having second thoughts. I would have to buy it now or within a few months because the price skyrockets the closer it gets to Christmas. We haven't been together all that long (about 6 months) and I don't know if it would be right to drop $500 on a present just yet.\n\nI have so many questions. Is this too much? Would it be creepy to get him something that he never asked for? What if giving him a game gives him bad feelings about getting laid off? What if we break up before Christmas and I am stuck with the game? Would the game have the same value to his collection if he didn't earn it himself?\n\nAny help would be great. I am torn.", "summary": "Foster kid boyfriend with Christmas birthday and video game collection. Is it too soon to get him a $500 game for his collection, especially after he has just been laid off from his game dev job?"}
{"id": "t3_2twbfz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (16f) don't want my Boyfriend (16m) hanging out with his female friend anymore", "post": "My boyfriend's been very close friends with this girl for a few years, and him and I have been dating for a year and a couple months now. I've never had a problem with their friendship and I know that it's platonic, they've never done sexual stuff or dated or anything. And she had a boyfriend throughout out entire relationship, but they broke up last Thursday. Since then she has been trying to talk to my boyfriend more and I'm worried that she wants to do stuff with him. I've hung out with my boyfriend twice since and both times he got several texts from her and she hardly ever used to text him while we've hung out before. And yesterday evening I called him and he was talking to her on the phone. All of a sudden since her boyfriend and her broke up now she's constantly trying to talk to my boyfriend? I think she likes him and I don't want them hanging out anymore, when he said he was talking to her on the other line I told him he's not allowed hanging out with her anymore and he seemed angry at me for saying that. Since that I've apologized and we aren't fighting now but I think he still talks to her. How do you think I could get them to stop their friendship without \"telling him what to do\"? Do you think that she wants to date him? Or why is she so obsessed with him now that she's single? I'm so upset and I'm worried about what will happen if they hang out with eachother now.", "summary": "My boyfriend's close female friend and her boyfriend broke up, and now she's trying to talk to my boyfriend more than ever. I don't want them to, but I don't want to seem controlling or make my boyfriend upset."}
{"id": "t3_19zkjr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [[22m]] gf [[20]] of six months says things were going too fast and she's not capable of being with anyone right now.", "post": "A little background. I met her this summer through her then boyfriend [[28]] of two years, who (as I learned later) treated her like shit, was generally abusive, cheated on her, and used violence on her. They were in a long distance relationship and see each other for about two weeks every two months. A few weeks later I invited her over for my birthday party, we got to know each other better and practically started dating (behind his back that is). Initially I didn't want to ruin their relationship but she said she no longer had any feelings for him and their relationship was going to an end. She broke up with him a few weeks later, when he came to visit her.\n\nOur beginnings were pretty intense. We'd hang out every day, spend most of free time together, see each other almost every day and send dozens of messages every day as well. It came to a point where we practically started living together. About a month into our relationship she said that she loves me. I told her I developed feelings for her as well. We started having sex not so long after that.\nAnyway, things were going pretty good for some time, until very recently, when the honemoon phase started deteriorating. I could feel someting was wrong with the way she acted towards me, she seemd sad and unhappy, so today I confroted her about it and what she said is basically that she thinks our relationship came too fast, that she feels bad about chating on her then boyfriend, and that I am a great guy (handsome, intelligent, romantic, good in bed, blah blah), but she thinks what she felt towards me was not love but affection and that this feeling is now gone. She also mentioned that she's used to being with someone significantly older, that I am way too good for her, that she is basically incapable of loving anyone right now and needs to be alone for some time. She didn't exclude being with me in the future though.\n\nWhat should I do guys? I don't want to lose her, I love her.\n\n(sorry for broken English, it's not my native language + I'm a bit drunk and devastated)", "summary": "she broke up with her long time boyfriend to be with me, we had a really intense and happy relationship, but now she says she wants to be single"}
{"id": "t3_1y6k5w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22m] with my girlfriend [19 F] of 1 and a half years, has been having communication and trust errors as of late", "post": "Everything in our relationship up until about a month ago was fantastic.  We never fought, we understood each other and acted like the bests of friends and lovers through it all.  Recently, I went back to school and our communication has been a bit strained, since I didn't do so well in last semester and have been focusing more on my studies.  \n\nLast weekend, I could tell something was definitely wrong.  She was constantly on the phone texting, conversation seemed strained and she seemed more engrossed with her phone and because of this there were problems during sex which made it not enjoyable at all.  We confronted each other and she told me she felt as if she doesn't feel as if we're in a relationship when I'm up here because I don't text as often as I used too.  \n\nOn my end, I'm worried because a new guy friend has come into her life and she seems to be putting more time into talking to this guy than to me.  I told her I would change and nothing was threatened in terms of a break up or anything, we both agreed we want this to last.  However, I can't shake this feeling that something is up and the more and more I think about it it makes me more and more paranoid and depressed. \n\nI just need someones outside opinion before I do anything or say anything irrational. I truly don't want my relationship to end with her, but with all the signs I'm getting, I just don't want to get dragged through the mud for months before something bad happens to me. \n\nNote-my girlfriend was a lesbian before I met her.  Failed relationships with men and a bad upbringing led her to hate men for a long time and I was the first guy she dated in years.  Doubt this has any relevance but I'm just trying to put all the facts out there.", "summary": "My girlfriend has been texting another man and has seemed more interested in him than in me.  At what point should I call it quits before I try and stay to long and end up getting hurt?"}
{"id": "t3_12m1du", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "26[f] who has never had children or married, dating 30 year old man who has divorced and 2 children. Part 2.", "post": "[Backstory]:( He has been divorced and has two children. I've never experienced any of those. I also realize that it takes a lot to be part of a broken family.\n\nI don't feel that my emotional needs are being met. I feel like I'm always listening to his problems, but he never hears mine. He also likes to go to strip clubs, a lot, and has all of these women who just randomly give him their numbers, etc. I'm concerned about one friend in particular of his. He says she's just a friend, but he's admitted to me before that she has a crush and she has also text me from his phone pretending to be him before. He never did anything about it and got mad at me for \"over reacting about it\". \n\nRecently things have changed though. He's been calling every day and showing a lot of improvement. I want to fall for him, but I keep having that nagging feeling in the back of my head. I did tell him that we would give this \"relationship\" one last try and then just let it all go if it didn't work. Since then there hasn't been a lot of fighting and there hasn't been any issues with his \"female friends\".\n\nI want to say I care about him, but I don't think he feels the same way towards me. He has made improvement, but it still just feels strange. I'm not sure where to go from here.", "summary": "I want to give into him, but I keep having a bad feeling in the back of my head. He acts like he has changed, but it doesn't feel like love to me or anything else."}
{"id": "t3_237df3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[28/f] Boyfriend [28/m] has skeletons and baggage from childhood, he's acting out. Break-up or help him?", "post": "In short, i'm at a cross-roads. Bf of 2 years has a lot of personal stuff he needs to address. It's not stuff that will be fixed in one session of therapy. It's a lot of stuff. Until recently things have been fine. \n\nNow I'm finding that these issues are affecting how he acts in his relationship with me and others. Certain things that he has done recently have led to complete distrust, simply because he withholds information until I stumble upon it and bring \"it\" up. I literally have to make a case before he confesses to \"it.\"\n\nI dont know what to do. I don't necessarily think that mental health is a reason to break up IF THE PERSON IS WILLING TO PUT IN WORK. I do think a lack of trust is a reason to break up. BUT, when the actions that led to the lack of trust are bc of the mental state of the person I'm lost.\n\nWHAT DO I DO????", "summary": "BF of 2 years is in a bad place mentally & is acting out in ways that lead to distrust. Break up or give it another chance even though trust has been broken?"}
{"id": "t3_4d7xfm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My BF (34m) had an online dating profile I (30f) didn't know about that was created after we started being exclusive. What do I do?! Help!!!", "post": "I (30f)found out my boyfriend (34m) of 4 months opened an online dating profile about two months after we because exclusive.  I was devastated and am freaking out.  He just told me he loves me a week ago and I feel the same.  We get along amazingly.  He is the first man in years I have felt a true honest connection with.  We made conscious mutual decision to be together exclusively and detailed all online accounts etc.  He suggested em make it fb official etc.  He is never super protective Iver his phone.  \nHe is under a lot of stress with work and an ill parent.  Thins moved pretty quick with us.  He has met all my family etc.  Hr is divorced and has been cheated on but (says)  he has never chested.  \n\nI confronted him and he said he dosent use the account.  He has never really engaged in it but just browsed.  He knew it was wrong and stored but never deleted it.  He also said that he was watching porn and then wants to browse POF because that is what he had done previously.  He told me I'm very caring and amazing and done nothing wrong. He wants to be with me and loves me.  He wants this to work.  He is deeply sorry and didn't want to hurt me.  There also had been a lack of sex in the relationship which he states is due to stress\n\nI'm town.  Ita still a new fresh relationship and I've been told when someone shows you are the first time to believe them. But then again he has been through alot and crests it a couple months ago.  I don't knoe how to feel or what to do or how to handle it.  Please help!!!", "summary": "My (30f) BF (34m) had a secret online dating account. He days it was on a whim and he never used it.  I don't know what to believe or what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_m2dmp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have begun treatment for adult ADD. I feel I have climbed out of Plato's cave. Now that my brain functions at its full capacity, I hunger for knowledge. Help me nourish my ambitions!", "post": "A little background information:\nMy condition was overlooked until now (19) due to a combination of what I assume was my intelligence compensating for the deficit and an aversion to the idea of ADD/ADHD by a great part of my family.\n\nI first became interested in ADD while talking to a friend about her condition and, upon further research, diagnosed myself; however, that is another story.\n\nThis thread isn't about ADD and I don't want ADD to be discussed on it.  My question stems from a new found ambitious drive and the fact that, while medicated, I am able to better access and apply my mind.  A lot of my current inspiration comes from the idea of a renaissance man, Edmond Dantes, and The Most Interesting Man in the World.\n\nAll being said, I humbly ask my fellow Redditors to answer a few questions:\n(feel free to answer as many or as few as you please)\n\nWhat do you wish you would have done  (to invest in yourself) when you were 18-22?\n\nName your top 3 books/philosophers/inspirational materials of all time.\n\nConvince me why I should learn a specific language as opposed to any other.\n\nLadies of Reddit, what sort of learned habits/characteristics/hobbies/skills do  you find attractive in a Man?\n\nWhat is a skill/subject I should dedicate some time to grow/learn about that will benefit me down the road?\n\nWhat ideas/motifs should I attempt to avoid throughout my human experience?\n\nAny other piece of information you would like to give me.", "summary": "I recently began treatment for my ADD.  Now that the error in my brain chemistry has been corrected, I am far more ambitious. (and have a better grip on my intelligence)"}
{"id": "t3_2gq85b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (22f) and boyfriend (21m) of 7 years moving in together for the first time across country", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years this November. We've been together since we were 14 and 15 and have never broken up. I would have liked to live together already at this point, but his parents have a rule that we cannot get engaged, married, or live together while he's in college. \n\nHe's just about to start his senior year of college and he's already got job interviews lined up for the west coast. He would like to work on the East or West coast while I'm hoping for West. We currently live in the Midwest (USA) but in separate houses. We're both concerned that because we've never lived together a move across the country to live together might break our relationship. I suggested that we do couples counseling. I have been in therapy personally for my own issues for about a year and have found it very helpful. We've had big fights in the past where I've brought up couples counseling, but he doesn't want to go because he feels uncomfortable with it and thinks we can fix our problems ourselves. \n\nI think it would be beneficial to do preventative couples counseling for this school year before we make the big move. He seems slightly more open to it than he has before because he's concerned as well and feels unprepared for the future. We have been through so much together and we're on the same page about big things like religion and children. We have a very solid foundation and there is so much love between us. We just want to be as prepared as possible so that our relationship flourishes when we move in together for the first time. \n\nMy question is has anybody gone through something similar and what would you recommend for us to be successful? Do you think couples counseling is a good idea for us? Please share your experiences and any advice you have! Thank you very much.", "summary": "Couple of 7 years moving in together for the first time across the country, curious if anyone has had a similar experience and can share advice. Is pre-move couples counseling a good idea?"}
{"id": "t3_12md1j", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[24/m] I am that controlling boyfriend.", "post": "Actually, I was that controlling boyfriend. I noticed it, but thought that it was just a little phase I was going through because of stress at work, past relationship experience, blah blah blah; but really, it doesn't seem like that was it at all.\n\nIt was pretty bad. I'd make mountains out of molehills, volcanoes out of mountains, and could find any reason in my head to think that she was deceiving me. Part of my personality is very analytic and I have a good memory, which didn't help at all. She would tell me about her day or a story from her past, and if something didn't add up I would prod and say things like, \"yeah, but you also said...\" or \"but wait, didn't you do...\"\n\nIt was bad, all bad.\n\nThe worst part is that in my head, I was sure that I was really in love with her and wanted her to have freedom. But in the back of my head, I was worried that deception is everywhere and its never that easy. I would get so sure of myself, becoming condescending while I told her what she was *really* thinking or did. Then, she'd finally get the straight story through to me and I'd start bawling and apologizing. I swore up and down that it wouldn't happen again, but it always would. \n\nWell, the day after I called about enrolling in therapy, she dumped me. I deserved it 100% and I'm not here to ask how to get her back, because, frankly, it will never happen. But, I'm wondering what experience and insight I can find here to help me overcome this problem. I would like a healthy relationship in the future, but I am completely incapable of having one, as I am now.", "summary": "I'm a controlling person, going to therapy soon, but wonder what /r/relationship_advice can say to help me overcome this flaw."}
{"id": "t3_1dvbic", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Pet lovers, how do you keep your home clean?", "post": "Everyone has their favorite tricks/tips to keeping a clean house, so I'm curious...and in the market for a new vacuum and/or steam mop. \n\nWe have three adult cats and one Italian Greyhound puppy and live in a mostly hard-wood apartment [two carpeted rooms and two large area rugs]. The cats are short hair but shed like crazy [black, white and grey!] and IGs don't really shed at all, but track in a decent amount of dirt from the yard. Getting sick of sweeping, swiffering and then pushing around dirt with a mop. It'd be nice to have a vacuum that picks up dirt and hair effectively on hardwood and carpet and I'm strongly considering investing in a steam mop.\n\nSo what do you do? What do you recommend?", "summary": "What are your favorite vacuums/mops/methods to keep a clean house for you and your pets."}
{"id": "t3_2vmw9b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I end a friendship even though they haven't done anything wrong?", "post": "I am in a situation that I have dreaded, and since I can't sleep, I figured I would reach out.\n\nI(24F) was friends with a group of guys in college my first two years- it was maybe the social circle I hung out with third most? They all lived in my same dorm community and I was pretty close to one of the guys because of our shared interest in video games. The rest of them I just enjoyed the company of and because they were in close proximity, we naturally would grab meals and hang out in the dorm. I don't think we ever went to any parties or any non campus based activity. I have since lost touch with most of them.\n\nOne of them attempted to get in touch a few months ago since we now live in the same city. It seemed like he had just gotten out of a relationship. I told him we could hang out when I wasn't busy with work. He reached out to me again a few weeks ago and I ignored him. I know I probably should have addressed this then. Now he has messaged me saying that he wants to know why the animosity between us and why I'm ignoring him.\n\nHe hasn't done anything wrong, I just don't have the desire or social capacity to continue a friendship. I often move from one social circle to the next and will maybe find one person I genuinely want to be life long friends with. I find myself stretched thin just keeping up with that handful of friends. I find most of my time spent with them, my SO and my two sisters, and they make me very happy. Some past friends have figured this out about me, and with others it is a gradual growing apart. I don't know how to handle someone trying to come back into my life uninvited. I also can admit that my concern the first time that he wanted to explore a possible romance opportunity and I was having none of that.\n\nI don't think it makes me a bad person to not continue being friends with this person, but I don't know how to end the friendship without being an asshole. r/relationships, have you ever been in a similar situation? How do I respond to this person?", "summary": "I don't want to continue being friends with someone who wants to be friends with me because I just don't feel a closeness or desire to. Wut do?"}
{"id": "t3_44pykw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me [21/F] with my hookup [24/M] recently few months, Advice Hookup: Go after it or stay put?", "post": "I've been friends with this guy that goes to college on the same campus as me for over a year. We would always catch up and hang out between classes, and even have some homework nights that would involve wine and getting our work done. I had always had a crush on him but he is so hard to read that I thought I was completely friend zoned.\n\nIt wasn't until one night I came back from the bars early and wanted to keep drinking that I asked if he was down to hang out and drink. I went over and we drank, talked and ended up watching episode after episode of a TV show. No moves were made this entire time. Then as it reached the early hours of the morning I fell asleep during one of the episodes and he woke me up to basically making out with me and hooking up.\n\nAfter this I didn't know what to do so I just sort of waited for him to say anything and I think we were both in shock so I just got dressed and we swapped a few words and I dipped out. Just recently we hooked up again after he came to a kickback I threw and we went back to his apartment with friends to play some drinking games and then I went back to my place only to get an invite to come back down. After this hookup he's the one that left me and told me was only leaving bc he had to be up in 3 hours. But we never kiss or anything after its just put on clothes and awkwardly showing each other out the door.\n\nHis friends have been pushing me to go after him and saying that he's lazy in the fact that he can want something but never really goes out of his way to get things. He also has told his friends in front of me that you cant just be friends with girls and also be attracted to them and plan to hookup because it doesn't work that way. So should I try to go after it or just keep it how it is now? My friends tell me I'm the Ice Queen and I don't show enough interest.", "summary": "Friends with a guy for over a year, just recently hooked up twice. Can't read him, confused by the signs."}
{"id": "t3_4bfc2a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with my friend [27F], she hasn't made an effort to hang out with me for about two months despite being friends for about 17 years. What should I do?", "post": "I should preface this by saying that she lives about 5 minutes away from me, we've known each other for 17 years, but I don't know if she is choosing to drift away or is just naturally busy.\n\nShe hasn't made the effort to hang out with me for two months and had been declining hanging out with me to the point where we would only hang out on weeknight rather than the weekend.\n\nShe has a mom that has quite a few mental-health related 'issues' but I think the majority of her time has basically been spent with her boyfriend.\n\nI feel like she's ditching me which is fine, but I don't know what I should say if she tries to reach out.  She has also stopped texting me and only sent me one text in the course of a month and a half...Should I end the friendship if she reaches out again?", "summary": "Me [25F] with my friend [27F], she hasn't made an effort to hang out with me for about two months despite being friends for about 17 years.  What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1g2z36", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Want to tell me the story of your life?", "post": "Hey!\nFirst off, sorry for my bad english, it's not my native language.\n\nI don't know if there is any kind of specific reddit for this, so please tell me if there is a better place to post.\n\nI'm in college studing arts in Barcelona, and i'm doing an antropology work where i have to search someone to tell me the story of his life. I thought that doing this in the street could be quite troublesome, since people might not want to tell face to face some parts of their life, so i thought that reddit could help me, becouse of the anonymity of internet.\n\nI'm not searching for an incredible and full of awesomeness fake story, i just want some real human, kinda detailed (around 2 - 3 pages), story. I know u might be just lazy, so don't even care about ortography or structure of the text; I'll have to translate it into spanish or catalan. I just want to ask for sincerity.\n\nNeedless to say, you will be appearing as anonymous.", "summary": "So yeah, if you want to help me just PM me with the story of your life, or post a comment below!"}
{"id": "t3_1mrtg9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[18F] with my partner [18M] together 1 year, thinking of moving in together", "post": "We've been considering moving in together. We've really been growing in to our relationship, and despise our age have matured into it. I've had a lot of struggles through the year - including my father's death. He has not left me, or avoided me, but he supported me through it all.\n\nWe're both studying a bachelor at university (first year) - he has a decent paying job (about $400 a week), and I've been getting temporary jobs here and there (Currently working 2, and earning $500 week). If we register our relationship officially and move in together, we will both be eligible for about $400-500 of government assistance each. \n\nWe are both ready for the challenge, and one way or another I am moving out of home. We won't be moving out until December-January, earliest. I will hopefully have a more permanent job, consistent.\n\nI'm seeing a lot of positives to moving in together, it may help develop our relationship further and build a life. We're certainly not ready for kids or marriage or anything. Just moving in together, into a small house/flat for rent (which is pretty cheap in our town, I've looked into it).\n\nSo, money aside - I'm really focused on the good points, and I'm hoping I'm not overlooking a crucial point. Is there some dead obvious reason not to move in together? Or any good advice on handle the situation, assuming it does go through? Or good advice for figuring it out.\n\nI want to move in with him. I want to cook with with him, and fall asleep beside him every night. I want to drag myself home after work, and have a cup of tea with him. I want to have those moments where one of us get grumpy because our assignment is due and it's not finished until 11.34pm... and the other stays up late enough to read it through that one last time before it's submitted. I want us to sort out our problems, make decisions together, and know we're in this for each other.", "summary": "thinking of moving in together, not sure if I'm missing something crucial in my decision. Would like advice or tips."}
{"id": "t3_12m7ap", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear Reddit, What silly/irrelevant/rediculous family miscommunications have lead to feuds lasting years?", "post": "My Grandma and my aunt (her daugher-in-aw) haven't spoken to each other in years over a phone that didn't get hung up.  My aunt and uncle screen their calls and frequently do not return them-- one time, my grandma called and left a message then thought she hung up the phone.  A few minutes later-- my Grandma was talking with someone in her home and used the word \"bitch\"-- this was all recorded on my aunt and uncle's answering machine and my aunt assumed it was about her and hasn't spoken to nor seen my Grandma in upwards of 5 years.  My Grandma wants to reconcile and clear the air, but my aunt won't go near her, won't let her husband (G-ma's son) and kids go there, and avoids family events.  My Grandma is almost 85-- and I think this is rediculous.  Why waste time the time you have with somone?  Why continue to hold a silly grudge?  To complicate matters further, my grandma has a daughter who lives with her and likes to be in other peoples business-- I think she is also part of the problem here as she won't drop it either.  Grandma is innocent but has a daughter and daughter-in-law who won't grow up and drop it.", "summary": "Grandma and aunt had silly miscommunication and haven't spoken in years-- What silly things have driven a wedge in your family?"}
{"id": "t3_c6tou", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, help me name a student-funded scholarship", "post": "Hi reddit.  I am writing a proposal for a student-funded fellowship program for mba students at UC Davis.  Here's the deal:\nEach summer, MBA students do internships.  Students interested in finance go off and work for investment banks, students interested in marketing go for advertising or market research positions with retailers or biotech/pharmaceutical companies, and students interested in energy business go for spots with utilities.   As you may guess, those internships can pay quite well.  At the same time, there are a few students who are pursue nonprofit, government, or other organizations driven by a social or environmental mission.  Those internships often don't pay at all.\n\nSo, what many schools do, is implement a student-funded fellowship program where each student that has a paid internship pledges one (or more) days salary to support the costs of those who take unpaid ones.  The idea is that the few students who commit to supporting the social and environmental bottom lines are supported by the many who are earning well on the economic bottom lines.  Kind of balancing out the 3-legged stool.\n\nOK so this is where you all come in.  I have the proposal all written but I need a name for the fellowship.  Most everything I have come up with is a mouthful or otherwise off-target.  Here are some examples:\nNonprofit Fellowship Fund (name of the narrower program I am proposing to replace),\n\nSocial and Environmental Enterprise Fellowship,\n\nTriple Bottom Line Fund,\n\nSocially Responsible Internship Fund.\n\nSee, none of these are particularly inspired. Help me.", "summary": "help me name a fellowship that will let mba students with paid internships cover costs of students who take unpaid internships but who contribute to making the world better."}
{"id": "t3_3u5dz6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure how I (24/m) feel about girl (22/f) that I've been dating for a month", "post": "So I've been dating this girl for a month and on paper we are perfect for each other. On the outside, we have a lot in common in that we like the same kind of music, same food, same movies etc, but also on the inside we are the same in that, we are both quite independent, we both are ambitious, both have the same cultural values, but most importantly we approach life the same. I have met a lot of people in my life (due to my job and how my social life is) and I genuinely have very rarely met anyone who has the same approach to life as me but who I also want to pursue a relationship with.\n\nHowever I have stumbled across a problem... Normally when I like a girl, I normally fall quite fast, quite hard for them. However, with this girl, only half the time do I feel infatuated for her, while the other half I'm not very bothered. E.g. Normally when a girl doesn't text me back for a couple of hours, I get quite concerned, but with her, I don't really pay attention. I'm quite confused as to why I'm not feeling fully infatuated with her - Is it because I either:\n\na) Am not really that interested in her. \n\nb) Realise that this relationship is doomed because she is moving back to her home country at the end of next year. \n\nc) Am still numb from the pain that my ex-girlfriend inflicted on me when she cheated on me a year ago.\n\nd) Am growing up/have a job and therefore the feeling of infatuation has reduced, but I'm also too busy with work to care.\n\ne) All of the above", "summary": "Why am I not as infatuated with this girl who is on paper, perfect for me, as I normally am with other girls before?"}
{"id": "t3_2dls2g", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not wearing a helmet on a bike", "post": "I didn't hurt my head but I got injured in another way. So I rode a bike today, something I rarely do. I grabbed a helmet and put it on the handlebars of the bike. After riding for maybe a quarter mile the strap of the helmet which was hanging down near the wheel got caught in the front wheel. The bike immediately stopped moving and I flew over the handlebars. I landed (hard) on my knees, left arm, and hip. I have no idea how I didn't hit my head, but if I did this may have been a much more serious ordeal.", "summary": "Wear your helmet so the helmet strap doesn't get caught in your front wheeling, throwing you onto the pavement and gravel with no warning."}
{"id": "t3_41f2vn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[F21] showed my boyfriend [M21] some vacation photos I had taken with my black boyfriend few years back. He got mad and is ice cold towards me right now.", "post": "I was showing my boyfriend photos from Greece when I was there a few years ago. he is a big history buff so we cuddled in bed and looked through the photos. I was there with my black boyfriend so he was of course in a lot of those photos. my new boyfriend asked who he was and when I said it was my ex-boyfriend he replied with a pained \"oh ok\" so we stopped looking at photos and watched some netflix instead.\n\nhe got really quiet and didnt want to cuddle anymore, he just sat and read a book. after a few hours i just had to ask\nhim what was up with his reaction to the photos with my boyfriend?\n\nHe said something like \"why would you even date me? if you like black guys so much why don't you date black guys? what's the point of being with me? im not your type\" \n\nI didn't even know I had a type. I just thought he was cute and nice so we dated. He didn't like my answer, got upset, we fought and he left.\n\nI don't really understand his reaction, it was actually very shocking. He has never come off as racist in the year I have known him, more like the opposite. He is a really sweet and fun guy and this was very out of character for him.\nthat was a week ago now and he didnt text me once. nothing. at first i expected an apology but got nothing so i started texting him and he is really distant and cold in his responses. i ask him what I did wrong and he doesnt answer me and avoids the subject. \n\ni ask him if he wants to break up and he said no and then stopped responding. what the hell is up with him?", "summary": "i showed vacation photos to my current boyfriend. my black ex-bf was in some of the pictures. we fought and he left. he is really distant right now and it hurts."}
{"id": "t3_2th4y9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] seeing [Late 30's M], is it weird?", "post": "So basically I've been hanging out with this guy who is in his late 30's. Almost a 20 year age difference. He looks great and seems like an okay guy but I feel like if I was in his situation I wouldn't even look at someone as young as me. It makes me think that he's strange to want to even talk with someone who is in a completely different stage of their life and are naive about a lot of aspects of life that he's experienced. He's come on pretty strong and I can make this into something if I want to. So what do y'all think, does he have issues? Using me for sex? Or can someone who is older and has dated with that much of an age gap explain why he would date that much younger", "summary": "I would feel weird if the situation was reversed. He seems like a great guy and I don't want to mess it up by freaking out about this. Do May-December relationships really ever work?"}
{"id": "t3_1zadvd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my college friend [19 F] about 1 month, I wanna hang out with her but I don't have a car.", "post": "This is the link for an earlier thread I posted about her \n\nShe basically doesn't have any friends and will spend all her spring break at home playing video games. I wanna hang out with her, but both of us don't have a car. I live with my grandma 10 minutes away from her house. Would it be weird to ask her to spend a day with us playing video games and eating pizza?\n\n Another thing I could do is ask her to go see a movie with me, but I would just meet her there since I'll be going with a bike. Do you guys think it's okay to do that? I also have 0 experience with girls. You can say this is the first girl in my life.", "summary": "I wanna hang out with this girl in Spring Break, but neither of us have a car, but I have a bike and we live close to each other. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3mi668", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Fast way to regain stamina after a run?", "post": "Hey /r/running, \n\nLast week my teacher told me the school was organizing a run. Everybody has to take part in a 20 minute run, which is part of an 8-hour relay with everyone from the school. Or if you would like to you can form a group of 6 people and run the full 8 hours with them. \n\nKind of jokingly I asked a friend of mine if he would like to do the full 8-hour run, he said yes, then someone else said she wanted to join our group, and now we're going to do it... We've decided it would be best to run in segments of 10 minutes so everyone will run eight times for ten minutes. \n\nHere's the thing though, my condition is not that good, at all. Last Thursday I ran 1,8km in 13 minutes and 28 seconds (8,03km/h) and today I ran 2,33km in 14:23 (9,72km/h). There are two things I would like to ask: \n\n-What would be a good strategy to improve my stamina so I'll be able to run for a longer time? \n\n-After I'm done with the first 10 minutes of running, how will I be able to regain stamina as quickly as possible (~50 minutes) to run the next 10 minutes, and then again.\n\nI'm 16y/o, the run will be in two weeks, do you think it's possible? I just keep telling myself to just do it :)", "summary": "I need to be able to run 8*10 minutes with 50 minute pauzes in between, how do I train for this?"}
{"id": "t3_1ogwx8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my ex [21 F] of a little over 2 years. Have been \"broken-up\" for months but continued to see each other casually. She is finally moving on and seeing someone else. I'm sad. Parents and family adored her. Need advice on to break the news and get back in the game.", "post": "Hi All, \n\nSo I was totally into this girl but it is finally fizzing out. I've pretty much been in denial about the whole thing since we've \"broken up\" but it's finally now catching up to me because she's seeing someone else now. Friends and family still talk like she's my girlfriend. I know it wasn't healthy just pushing it away for so long but I need to face the music.\n\nMy family basically treated her like family because they liked her so much. I'm wondering if anyone else has had an experience like this? \n\nIdk maybe I'm just kind of venting. This sucks.", "summary": "lingered around this girl for way too long. I'm high and dry now. Need a pep-talk."}
{"id": "t3_48ig7e", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "(SOMEWHAT URGENT) Training a worker that doesn't respect my authority.", "post": "I got in to work today to find that I will be training someone to take over someone else's shift.\n\nI've only been here an hour and so far, he's shooed me away from things, taken things out of my hands, interrupted me to boss customers around, and every time he does something the owner would kill him for (i.e. using the wrong soap or cups) I would let him know how he was supposed to do it, to be cut off by \"yeah yeah yeah, I know how to do it.\"\n\nHes apparently worked at a different location previously and has forgotten a lot but insists on doing everything himself. When I try to tell him I need him to do something else he flat out says 'no.' Hes been in a phone call for the last 15 minutes.\n\nIts just his first shift. I know I have to put my foot down. But how do I do so without starting an argument? I'm stuck here with him until 10 and will probably be training him again after today, but I need to make it clear that he DOES have to listen to me sometimes.", "summary": "new guy in training. Im training him. He wont listen to anything I say. How to professionally tell him to step off"}
{"id": "t3_1yrrh3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a dumb [21] male and so I'm having a lot of trouble interpreting the signals that this [21] girl may or may not be sending me. A little help please?", "post": "So okay, I'm from New York but I study in Oregon for most of the year. Recently a friend of mine who I was not really close started facebook messaging me, that was about 3 months ago, since then we've talked almost everyday. She even asks when we can skype all the time and insists we do so and keep in touch. This sort of came out of the blue so naturally I just assumed she was into me. I can't really date her given that we live across the country, but I would if I could, she's really great in my opinion. Anyways we continue to speak to each other as usual and then last week I returned to new york for a break and so given that she and I share a group of friends I was hoping we could hang out together with them all for the little time where we're both in the same town. I tried to do just that but she totally gave me the cold shoulder; not being really responsive to hanging out, leaving early when we finally did etc...\n\nAm I wrong in my original assumption that she was into me just because out of the blue she started talking to me a lot? Is she trying to play hard to get? Am I looking way too into this and maybe she was just occupied that weekend?\n\nI really have no idea how to evaluate this. Do any of you guys have any suggestions/ideas?", "summary": "I thought she liked me when i was living far away but when i returned to the same town she started giving me the cold shoulder. What gives?"}
{"id": "t3_3dspuh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by Burning my Butthole with Cayenne Pepper", "post": "So I recently found out I have scabies on my legs and stomach. \n\nI made a doctors appointment for treatment next week, but I figured maybe I would find some natural remedies to at least help a little because the itching was unbearable. Turns out among the tea tree and neem oils, bathing in apple cider vinegar, you could also soak the affected areas with a cayenne pepper bath. I guess the pepper literally burns the surface mites. \n\nDesperate as I was, I set up a bath with everything: threw in the oils, vinegar, and a fuck ton of cayenne pepper. I don't know why I didn't think about this, but I fully immersed myself in the water. I was soaking and scrubbing my legs for a few minutes when I felt a strange sensation. I paused for a moment, then yelped in pain and jumped straight out of the bathtub. My downstairs was fucking SEARING...on both ends.\n\nI quickly drained the tub and tried to rinse out both my lady parts and butthole, but to no avail. Peeing helped a bit, but there is some definite bleeding in my backside and the burn is killing me. \nIt's been about twenty minutes. As I type I lay on my bed with an ice pack on my ass, trying to ride this one out hoping it goes away.\nI'm such an idiot.", "summary": "TIFU by trying to help scabies with a bath of cayenne pepper, which instead burnt my butthole and my lady parts."}
{"id": "t3_176jur", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Has anyone ever felt sexual chemistry with someone the second time around but not the first?", "post": "Backstory: I'm 22 (f) and a few days ago, on our third date, I finally had my first kiss/other shenanigans with someone I like very much.  But I didn't feel much - in fact I was rather bored and disappointed with the apparent discrepancy in our emotional and sexual reactions to making out.  A couple of days later I very grudgingly broke it off because I figured that's that - no sexual chemistry, and I didn't want to string him along.  But I really want this to not be the case because I rarely (obviously being 22 and only having just had my first kiss) meet guys whom I like quite like this.  Maybe it was just so new that I couldn't appreciate it and a second go-round would prove more lady-boner inducing?  Maybe sexual chemistry can pop up (har har) after developing more of an emotional connection?  Or maybe I'm just grasping at straws, and if it were possible to give it another shot I'd just put us both through more disappointment.", "summary": "Has anyone ever felt little sexual chemistry upon kissing/making out with someone to at first, but then found that \"spark\" a little later on?"}
{"id": "t3_266cfl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(17F) am hoping to move out of my pregnant, abusive, mothers house and in with my boyfriend (18M) after I turn 18. He still lives at his parents house, what can I do to make them more likely to agree to this situation?", "post": "As the title says I need to move out of my house. My current living situation is not healthy and most days more often than not I cry for at least an hour because of my mother and how she treats me. She is also pregnant. I made a post awhile ago about this and my current situation for those of you who read this and it sounds familiar. \n\nMy boyfriends parents have briefly offered before but I don't know if they were serious or not... We plan to ask them at some point soon, they do not know that my current home life is as bad as it is and I'm contemplating telling them when we ask if it would be a possibility.\n\n As a bit of a background my boyfriends older brother got a girl pregnant his senior year in high school and she lived with them for a long time(they have since moved out) she was lazy, created messes and basically left her kid with them so she could go do whatever it's is that she does. I would be coming into their home at least looking for a job but hopefully already having one, with a license (she didn't have one, only recently got one) and car, a high school graduate (she dropped out), in an abusive home, in college, plus I cook and clean which she never did. I'm really hoping these things will swing them in my favor. Also I would only be living there for around a year or a bit longer but not by much. Please no relationship judgement, I know we are young but this is pretty much my only option and we love each other dearly. \n\nHis parents are a bit strict and weary of having another grandchild. That would work against me. At this point we aren't supposed to be in a room alone, if this happened that would be common.... \nAlso we've been together over a year.", "summary": "really bad home life, want to move in with boyfriends family, what things could I do or say to make his parents be more apt to agree?"}
{"id": "t3_1qiblp", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/m] About to meet girl [19/f] for the first time after months of online/text chat. Anyone have similar experience? Please share.", "post": "Almost a year ago I met this girl on a online site and since then we have text almost every day and spoken on the phone a number of times. I don't know why we have never skyped, none of us have ever brought it up. We have however exchanged pics/videos so I'm 99.9999% she isn't some stranger from Ghana.\n\nAnyway we've hit it off really well and I get on with her unlike anyone else I've ever spoken too. We come to eachother for advice and we have quite a good sense of eachothers personalities. Now recently she said she is going somewhere and with a bit more conversation this may end up being our first meeting as I've been looking to go somewhere and she suggested that I go with her as at least she'd roughly know someone. \n\nShe is an incredibly nicest person and we have spoken about past relationships, she said she isn't one to judge and I've spoken/seen people she has been out with before and she herself described them as \"not exactly lookers\", so I'm not afraid of her seeing me and being like \"what kind of creature are you\" as I'm not exactly overweight or hard to look at. I am however still incredibly nervous that we may not get along, why I have no idea. \n\nI'm not looking for advice on what to do I am however hoping that some here have been in a similar situation and how it ended up?", "summary": "Meeting girl for the first time. We get on great. Still nervous. Anyone had a similar experience? How did it go?"}
{"id": "t3_3myjtu", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Cold applying for a marketing position in a small local company by attaching a proposal for their business website. Feasible idea?", "post": "Hello /r/jobs, I graduated a few months ago and had no luck so far to get a job in marketing/sales. \n\nThere's a small local company (perhaps 30 employees) but they are actually pretty successful in what they're doing (known worldwide). I checked their website and it's awful. Looks like a website from the early 2000's. So I guess they are not pretty good in (online-)marketing. \n\nI would like to do a cold application (not sure if they are looking for a marketing guy) but I had no luck with this kind of application in the past. That's why I thought I try something different. I have good skills in photoshop, indesign and illustrator. As a teenager I also built websites using HTML, so I thought I build a dummy website fitted to their company and attach some screenshots to my application.\n\nWhat do you think? I this a feasible idea or will they be offended?\n\nThank you very much in advance.", "summary": "Want to add a webdesign proposal to my cold application for a marketing position in a small company which current website is awful."}
{"id": "t3_4i36rb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend (34F) gave me an ultimatum, I realized it's a deal breaker for me(29F). He's still a good person and I'm lost on how to proceed with the breakup.", "post": "We've been together three years. He has a degree (communications), tried to go back for another (more useful) one and got burnt out. He works a dead end job now, but is happy, which is important to me. But I'm also frustrated because I feel like I have more responsibilities in our relationship. I carry him on my insurance, pay for our car (which I do use more), make our house budget/cleaning chart and am trying to save up for a house for us.\n\nFor two years, he told me this job was temporary while he figured out which direction he wanted to go with his career. Last night he sat me down and told me he needed to give me an ultimatum (his words, \"I don't mean it to be one, but it is\"). He knows his job isn't what I want him to be doing but he's okay with it. He appreciates that I've been trying to support him figuring it out, but he's going to stop that and just live in the moment....for now. He knows himself and when he figures it out, he'll be passionate and dive in. \n\nAt the time, I was relieved to hear him tell me straight up.....but after a night of sleep and a day to digest everything he said, the full weight is sinking in. This is a deal breaker for me. I respect his reasons (personal happiness is really important) and wish him well (he's a good person), but I've never been in this spot before. All my past relationships ended with fireworks, drama, tears.... this feels very \"we both are in different places.\" \n\nOur lease is up at the end of June. Do I say something now? Wait until a month out? All these feelings just hit me on my lunch break and I'm starting to panic! I know it will be a hard breakup in the sense that we both love one another and neither did anything wrong, but that just knots my stomach even more! I don't want to make him feel guilty.", "summary": "boyfriend gave me ultimatum, I realized it's a deal breaker for me. He's still a good person and I'm lost on how to proceed with the breakup."}
{"id": "t3_1nctj7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] brokeup after 2.5 years this week and I'm having urges to start talking with her again", "post": "Sorry in advance for the wall of text this seems to be! I didn't' mean for it.\nEarlier this week, my ex dumped me because she said she couldn't be a good student (we are both in university) and a good girlfriend. Before this all happened we couldn't really see each other very much but we still texted and tried out best.\n\nI've always been there for her and optimistic that we would find the time when we could to make the most of it. I drove her home from a weekend staying in our hometown and we try to figure things out but it ends up we break up and I'm heartbroken\n\nI still drive her home and do my best but she sends me a long message saying that she can't bare to see pictures of me with friends or in a relationship so she deletes me. I'm confused about the whole situation but somehow talk myself into that it's for the best. \n\nThe next day when I come home from school I see a bag on the doorstep. When I look inside its all the things I gave her through the time together. I was crushed. I felt betrayed, lonely, and couldn't understand what I did to deserve this. I quickly glance at her roommate's Facebook and see that they went out downtown and I think the worse. Of all the years I've known her, I've never seen her act like this.\n\nNow that it has been some time I am doing better. I try not to look too much into what she is doing but I feel wrong and I have urges to at least Facebook her or say hey at school. I was wondering if anyone else could relate or provide some guidance.", "summary": "my ex of 2.5 years broke up with me earlier this week and completely removed me from her life. Day after she returns everything I gave her and I still have urges to contact her again."}
{"id": "t3_4buump", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] and my boyfriend [21 M] dated for a year, he ended it two months ago and he's just now figured out that I'm \"it\"", "post": "I'm a senior in college right now and my boyfriend and I had been dating for about a year when he ended it very abruptly about 2 months ago. With that it ended pretty explosively. The initial breakup was - as normal - upsetting but fine. Within days though he was pestering me via text and through mutual friends, constantly trying to get me to talk to him. Basically, when I went back to his place to get my stuff back, it ended in an extremely heated argument with lots of yelling on his end.\n\nFastforward 2 months and we've just gotten back from our separate spring breaks. I come home to a text from him saying that breaking up with me was the biggest mistake of his life and that he would like an opportunity to talk and a chance to prove his worth to me. We ended up talking for a long time during which we talked about what had happened during our relationship and he explained to me that he broke up with me because he was intimidated by the fact that I had a job so long before him and that there were some pretty bad problems going on at home that he felt he couldn't talk to me about.\n\nWe've been texting a little over the past few days since I said we could try being friends. Tonight though, I received a long text from him saying basically he would like to date me again because he has realized that I am \"the one\" and he wants a second chance.\n\nSo confused here, I have no idea what to do and I am feeling incredibly torn. Any advice would be much appreciated.", "summary": "Boyfriend ended things with me (lots of anger involved) about 2 months ago and now revealed that it was a mistake and I'm \"the one\". What do I do???"}
{"id": "t3_3ecux3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [M17] and my girlfriend [F16] for 11 months fight and bicker over everything, how do we stop?", "post": "Me and her fight over every single little thing you can think of, but they aren't huge arguments where we yell and scream at each other, but more of petty disagreements, that happen every day or every other day.\n\nThey have been going on for quite a while, but haven't always happened when we first started dating we got along great! We were always happy and never disagreed but past that, after about month 3 we started bickering about everything, however it is never in person only on the phone.\n\nI am asking for advice on what to do, how to stop bickering, really at this point any advice is appreciated, we both agreed we can't continue doing this.", "summary": "me and my girlfriend bicker about everything imaginable, we have ran out of ideas and we are just looking for what to do about it, any advice will help."}
{"id": "t3_43i04x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it really possible to meet the right person at the wrong time?", "post": "This past October I (19F) met a really great guy (20M) through tinder. We went on a few dates here and there and got along really well.\n\nHowever, we did run into some problems when it came to hanging out. If I had some free time, he would be working or in school (does both full time). And if he had free time I'd be in school or not home at the time (plus, I don't have my license yet so transportation was a factor too). This made it really difficult for us to hang out and see each other more. \n\nToday, we started talking on snapchat and he told me he doesn't think this can work anymore. I was crushed because I was really starting to like him and he even told me he had feelings for me as well. He said he just wants to work on himself for a while. I asked him if it's possible if things do work out in the future will he reconsider trying again. He didn't give me a straight answer saying it just depends on when it happens. \n\nSo my question for you /r/relationships is it possible to meet the right person at the wrong time? And if yes, can things work out in the end? I'm really hurt right now and don't know how to feel because this has never happened to me before.", "summary": "Do you think it's possible to rekindle a relationship after things didn't work out the first time due to timing?"}
{"id": "t3_1d4572", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm pretty sure my boyfriend's (M22) girl friend (F21) has a crush on him. How do I handle it?", "post": "Yesterday, my boyfriend had a pool party and invited a bunch of people.  I think one of the girls he's friends with has a crush on him.  As soon as I met her, I just knew.  I catch her staring at my boyfriend, teasing him in a flirty manner, and she laughs at *everything* he says.\n\nAt the pool party, she took it upon herself to let my boyfriend know that he was getting a little sunburned on his back.  Not even five minutes later, she was putting sunscreen on his back and rubbing/massaging his shoulders. \n\nShe followed him around the entire time.  This girl has got it bad for my boyfriend.\n\nIs there a good way to bring this up with him in a loving way?  We're in a five month relationship so it's not like we've been together that long.", "summary": "My boyfriend's (M22) girl friend (F21) definitely has a crush on him.  How can I talk with in about this in a loving way?"}
{"id": "t3_uiu5d", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Made a mistake and need advice", "post": "I have been seeing a friend and classmate for a while now (6 months) and I have taken her to numerous dinners. We always enjoy each others company and share the same interests. After our last dinner I told her that I havent been on a date in a real long time and was thinking about getting into the scene agian. She was obviously distressed because I am assuming she thought we were on dates this whole time. Anyways to make a long story short I ended up kissing her when leaving. It was real sudden and took her completely off gaurd. When I got home we talked on the phone and I admitted that I was unaware that the dinners we were on were dates. However I do like her and would like to continue seeing her and to make sure my actions were not crossing any lines. She said I didnt cross any lines. So, I asked her on another real date this tuesday and she agreed. This all happened on Thursday of last week. I texted her twice yesterday(Saturday) to which she didn't responed and recently tried to call her to make plans (amusement park) and she didn;t pick up nor return my call. I am wondering should I stop communication and let her figure out what she wants or send a text telling her I am sorry for how I did it, becuase I am not sorry I did kiss her. Any advice would be appreciated.", "summary": "I kissed a girl and took her by surprise, now she is not responeding to texts or calls, need help Please and Thank you."}
{"id": "t3_1w9yo9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34M] with my separated wife [33F] 14 years, why do i feel nothing?", "post": "Quick run down of the relationship:\n\nWhirlwind romance and 6 months later Married young (20 and 19 respectively), together for 14 years, 2 kids over the course of it. In the end a number of issues ended the relationship, to begin with my own inadequacies and addictions, but after the separation thinking about it i came to terms that maybe neither of us were overly happy. 3 days after the separation she asked me back, and i refused, saying we had more issues to work through.\n\nFor a long time after this i begged and pleaded and did everything i could to get us back together, but she needed to \"evaluate her feelings\", as she for a long time felt nothing towards me. A few weeks ago she requested i cut all non-essential contact (so only discussions about kid arrangements etc were to take place). Since then i have taken steps to survive, removing many itmes around my home that reminded me of \"us\", removing my wedding ring, ive had a sexual experience with someone else (nothing major and no harm done on either side, were both aware of the current situation) and been on my first date in 15 years.\n\nAfter a recent meet up with my wife, she confessed a number of feelings, such as jealousy, missing me, her heart wants me but her head says its a bad idea etc. The only feelings i'm experiencing are pity for how shes currently doing, and exasperation at how messed around im feeling with her off again-on again contact and physical/mental affection (often not both at the same time).\n\nIs this normal? am i going through a phase where if i tell her i dont feel anything it could change in 2 weeks and by then it will be too late? Or am i finally looking at moving my life on past this relationship?\nShould i be open about my feelings and experiences (we made a clause on breakup, she didnt want to know anything i did with other people while we were separated, and told me to lie if i had done anything) or would that just end everything, and if it did is that for the best?\n\nIf someone could just live my life for me for a bit and give it back in a few months that would be grand :D", "summary": "Wife loved me, didint love me, now possibly loves me again, I loved her, loved her, and now feel nothing... what do i do?"}
{"id": "t3_3cat4r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a [23 M] and coincidentally met a great [21 F] girl over the weekend. The problem? She lives far away. Help me out Reddit!", "post": "Over this weekend I was able to meet a remarkable girl. Pretty much from the get go it was obvious that at least I was interested (I drunkenly gave her a flower at a cocktail party to start off our first conversation), but she also ended up hanging out with me the next night as well at my house, albeit with her friend. She knows I have a crush on her. I know she is interested in me at the least as a friend, but I am not fully confident if she is interested as anything more (we've only met a couple days, I'm about 60-70% sure she's interested in me beyond friendship - I thought I heard her asking her friend if it was okay to sleep over at my place but I'm not sure).\n\nI don't have a problem with LDRs provided they are serious but to be honest, I have my own life and school to focus on now anyway. I don't think I want a relationship as of the current moment. I'm more interested in down the road - this is the first girl that I met that is astoundingly pretty, captivating, and is part of my exact same culture (families are pretty much the exact same which I value a lot). Practically speaking, it's perfect material for a serious relationship save for the fact that she lives far away. Which pretty much renders the whole thing impractical as of the moment.\n\nI want to continue talking to her but I'm not sure where or how to gear the relationship. I'd like to get to know her better but also be in a place in the future where she knows I'm (likely) seriously interested and I can figure out if she is seriously interested in a relationship. \n\nI know I've only met her a couple days, but I've just got a feeling on this one...", "summary": "Met a girl who lives far away, need to know what to do to keep a relationship on the table for the future."}
{"id": "t3_2axgck", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by eating Taco Bell while driving", "post": "I'll start from this morning. It was a normal day for me. I woke up at around 7:30 as I usually do so I could wake up and get to work on time. I did so, worked my 8 hours, clocked in, clocked out. My coworkers wanted to go out to get something to eat, but I wasn't feeling social today, so I passed and walked to my car.\n\nHowever, I was feeling rather hungry. I'm currently on a diet, but I've been on it for a rather long time (around 6 months) so I had forgotten what the taste of a deliciously disgusting Taco Bell taco tasted like. Once I started thinking about it, I couldn't stop so I set my course to the nearest Taco Bell about 15 minutes away.\n\nAfter driving for a bit I finally reached my destination. I pulled up to the drive-thru, placed my order for 2 tacos, a crunchwrap and a large Mountain Dew. I pulled up to the next window, paid for my order, and sat the bag of food on the passenger seat next to me. I checked my phone to see what time it was, and determined that I had enough time to eat in a parking space and be home in time for my family. \n\nLet's just say I fucking ravaged those first 2 tacos. I scarfed them down like I've never seen what a scrap of food looked like before. As I'm about to move onto my crunchwrap, I get a phonecall from my wife asking where I am.\n\n\"You're at Taco Bell?! You said you'd drive Caitlyn (our daughter) to soccer practice!\"\n\nShit. I hung up the phone and stepped on the gas with one hand on the wheel and another on my crunchwrap. I was doing 70 on the highway trying to rush back to get my daughter there on time. \n\nBut that crunchwrap was way to delicious. I was paying too much attention to the deliciousness, the amazingness, the...\n\nI felt a thud. My windshield cracked. I pulled over and stepped out of my car to what was the remains of a now dead deer and a busted windshield along with other damages to my car. Caitlyn was late to practice.", "summary": "I went to Taco Bell, forgot I had to drive my daughter to soccer practice, killed a deer and busted up my car because of a crunchwrap."}
{"id": "t3_31eka9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] with the guy [24~M] I've been seeing for a month, not sure if i should mention him to my judgmental family at Easter.", "post": "I'm very happy with this guy so far, we've been getting along great. We've got good communication and we're on the same page about where we are and where we see things going. \n\nThis weekend he's meeting my family, but just my parents and siblings. He's also invited me over to meet his family for a while on Easter, which i'm very excited about. \n\nHowever, I'm also going to be spending part of Easter with my extended family. Many of these relatives tend to be somewhat judgmental and disapproving of my relationships. Not the *people* I date, but how many people I've dated, and that I put these relationships on facebook (because \"people can see how many people you date, and might think you're promiscuous\"). I've had my fair share of relationships, but never more than 2 in one year. \n\nI originally wanted to hold off on talking about him until things got more serious, hoping that my family would take me more seriously. However, I also don't want to appear ashamed of him, or like I'm trying to hide him. I appriciate that he has been so open about me meeting his family, and want to be able to share my family with him too.", "summary": "My relatives are skeptical of how many people I've dated, which makes me hesitant to talk about the guy i'm seeing; would it be better to mention him now, or to hold off and see how things go?"}
{"id": "t3_dwe2g", "subreddit": "self", "title": "A little help please?", "post": "So, I've been in a relationship with my (now ex) girlfriend for roughly 2.5 years and it just ended suddenly tonight. I guess it was because of a lot of stuff that's been building up throughout our relationship. It is long distance because I'm away at college so I definitely understand why things went sour. For clarification, I broke up with her. She was fairly controlling throughout our relationship and was also extremely clingy. I never really got any appreciation for the stuff I did for her and she is also an extremely jealous person. I'm the only person that she has to rely on when she needs someone and she expects me to be at her side at the drop of a hat. We had different views on a lot of things, including religion, marriage, and children, but we were extremely serious and considering engagement in the future. Fiscally, she wasn't really appropriate for me because she is a rather large spender while I prefer to save our money. Unfortunately, I would give in on these whims and now I don't really have much to show for working throughout my high school career. Although things haven't been that good for us when we are away from one another, they are typically really good when we are together. After breaking up with her, she told me that she was going to change everything that I dislike about her because she had figured all of this out already and was wanting to fix it before anything bad happened. I told her that it was a little too late because these problems have come up before and they were never fixed, but she insisted that she would keep trying she also said that she hopes that we can get back together some time in the future. I really don't know how to handle the situation, Reddit. Can you help me out? Do I stay friends with her? Do I give her another chance? Do I try to experience more of the college lifestyle and meet other girls and date them? Any advice you can offer is greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Broke up with my girlfriend because of problems that have occurred throughout our 2.5 year relationship and are still occurring now after \"resolutions\". She says she'll fix it. Thoughts on what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_11kn4y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Just finished A Thousand Splendid Suns. The end kicked my ass. Reddit, what  moments in literature/film have overwhelmed you?", "post": "SPOILER ALERT: I loved A Thousand Splendid Suns. Read it in 3 days. It was a page turner, for sure. At the end, when she puts the tape in, and it's Pinocchio, and she has no idea why... I threw the book across the room and bawled like I haven't since my best friend died. I don't know why.. Everything came rushing back. I thought about where I'd been, where I'm going.. I thought about all the amazing people in the world who will be forgotten. I thought about how cruel I've been, and how selfish. I thought about how people in the world are suffering while I am sitting in America. I thought about too many things at once, and it took me a good 15 minutes to come down from that emotional high. Truly one of the greatest moments of my literary history.\n\nSo reddit... I'd like to know, what moments in literature, film, comics, tv, etc.. have had an emotional impact on you? Preferably something that you weren't expecting. Something simple, something complex, something obscure, something famous. I want to know, what are the most gut wrenching, heart warming, enlightening, wonderful, awful twists (yes, I said it) that human minds have ever conceived of. What's made your hair stand on end, your heart drop into your stomach, your eyes swell up, a lump form in your throat, choked you up, made you shout \"NO.\" The only think I ask of you is to put the title at the top so that if we haven't seen/read it, we know not to look at the comment.", "summary": "What twists/surprises in film/literature/video games (incl. tv, graphic novels, etc..) have shocked you and drawn out the most emotion?"}
{"id": "t3_eprtc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hi Reddit. I said something inappropriate around my family. Please tell me what YOU said. HOW DID YOU DEAL WITH BEING BANISHED FROM THE FAMILY?", "post": "Tonight I was at dinner with my dad and step mom. My dad is way older than my step mom. \nI asked my step mom if she married my dad while she was in college or before she started college.\nMy brother replied for her and said \"while she was in elementary school\". As a joke and everyone laughed.\nI got excited because I...I'm lame and something inappropriate slipped out...\nAlong the lines of....my dad having a white van....hiding candy in it.....driving around schools....doing things....it got worse as I kept talking.\nI don't know what the hell is wrong with me. It's like I don't have a filter. I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY.\nAnyway, everyone just exchanged awkward glances and my brother said \"wow, sometimes you shouldn't be invited to dinner.\" \nAnd my step mom said I was \"disgusting\". \nI decided to just  be quiet the whole night and eat lots of cheesecake. I don't know if I could have said something to fix the situation.", "summary": "Please tell me what you said that was super awkward and retarded and how you dealt with the responses of your loved ones. Are you still allowed to come to dinner?"}
{"id": "t3_k8lrr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do I move back in with my boyfriend?", "post": "I'm a 22/F with a 23/M and we've been together for 2.5 years. Our relationship is loving and happy, and due to the fact that we live approximately 45 minutes away from each other (both living with our parents [embarrassing, but resources we're lucky to have]) have to restrict our visits to about 2 days a week. \n\nWe did the 2 days a week for a year and a half, then we got an apartment together for 6 months. When we lived together life was wonderful, and I couldn't ask for better. Due to various financial difficulties compounded by extreme family crises, we both moved back to our parents' homes until the crises were dealt with and we had enough saved up to move out again. The time to move out of my parents' house is coming up,  I'm unsure if when I move back out it should be with him.\n\nIt has always been extremely important to me that I live by myself for at least a year, at some (relatively early) point in my adult life. My mom drilled in to me that you must learn to be alone in order to function well within relationships, and I think at this point I would feel like I had missed out on something major if I didn't experience living on my own soon. \n\nI've talked about this with my boyfriend and he understands/encourages me to do what I need to do, but I don't want to move without him. So much of my relationship with him has been spent with strict limits on time that when the opportunity arises to live with him again I know I won't want to say \"No\". Plus, it just seems like a huge economic waste for us both to be paying for an apartment, Internet, etc. etc., when we could just be splitting the bill (our low incomes plays a role in my trepidation as well), when he moves to the same city I'm moving to.", "summary": "I want to live with my boyfriend, but will feel as though I missed out on a formative experience unless I live alone (soon)."}
{"id": "t3_2cdrxl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Ex (30/f) of 2 years and I (27/m) broke up a few months ago. I really do love her but she won't tell me she does.", "post": "I know I'm going to get some crappy replies to this but I'm sucking up and I'm going to take it on the chin. \n\nFor the past year, I used my ex as an emotional punchbag. I have been going through issues which have left myself emotionally unable to stop myself from saying things and blowing up out of proportion. I was recently diagnosed with bpd which I was worried about and basically, I used her as that emotional punchbag for a year before we split. \n\nI have since come to terms with the fact that I completely cocked up, pushed her away and used her for my problems. I have really felt bad about it and I have told her I love her. She doesn't say anything back but I know that when she hears it, she changes her attitude for the better. \n\nI really want to get back with her and put this behind us. I know there's something still there even if the chances are small. I would jump at the opportunity no matter how small to show that I have come to terms with who I am and what is wrong with me. I know if we can get over this, we'll be stronger than ever and ready to take on the world. She really is the love of my life. I know everyone says it but it's true. I've never loved someone as much as I \n\nAny advice on what to do would be much appreciated and how to approach, what seems to be, this thorny subject.", "summary": "really cocked up but want everything to be back to normal (before the aforementioned events) . Willing to do anything. Need a way to go. "}
{"id": "t3_2duxo0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 F] with my Boyfriend [26 M] 8 months, my sex drive is bigger than his", "post": "I've been dating Boyfriend for about 8 months, and this isn't a huge problem or a deal breaker. I love him a lot and we have plans on marrying when I'm done with university. Unfortunately, this has been a problem for a long while now, and it's really been getting troublesome these past couple days.\n\nSee, the more time goes on, the more sex I want to have with him. I see sex as one of the few ways that I feel close to him. For him, though, sex is just an extra thing to do with the person he loves. Which is fine, except that there are days when he's just too tired to do things. And while I respect that, those also happen to be the days where I see him the least, which makes me want to feel close to him even more. It hurts to be turned down, and it hurts him to hurt me, and it hurts me to hurt him, so on and so forth. While its only been this difficult these past couple of days, we both agree that this is kind of a problem that should be resolved sooner rather than be held off.\n\nMy position is to change, and that it's my own problem that I have to deal with. He doesn't think I should, though, and that there's some middle ground that we can reach that works. I'm really not sure what to do. Masturbation doesn't really work, and forcing him to put out is not an option.", "summary": "I crave sex when my boyfriend can't put out, and we both feel bad about it. Not sure whether I should change how I am, or if there's a middle ground."}
{"id": "t3_1qvz53", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My bf [23] doesn't speak of his childhood, but I[f22] know he's traumatized.", "post": "We were friends for 10 years, before we got together. He than told me once about his terrible childhood. (He told only 3 of his friends his story)\n\nNow we're a couple for quite a few months and well, sometimes there's stuff I know that reminds him of his childhood, but it's like he's forgotten that he had told me. So he keeps pretending that nothing happened.\n\nSome examples\nLately we were watching an old TVshow, that every child watched when we're young, like Sesamestreet, and he couldn't remember a thing. (Which I think is because he forced himself to forget everything.)\nHe likes christmas, but only the food, not the stuff with Santa, and he hates to get presents. (Which is the thing childs like the most about christmas.)\nAnd stuff like watching TVshows about raising children. We talk about how we're going to raise ours in the future and that we won't will be as horrible as the parents on TV. (But striking, the things he thinks are important are always the things his parents should have done, to save him from the traumatizing stuff.)\n\nI know he likes to put his problems far away. But on the other hand, I'm his girlfriend now and we're pretty serious, isn't it good to speak about it maybe just once, so he knows I know his secret/won't tell, and most of all, I'm always there for him?\n\nWhat do you think?", "summary": "My bf doesn't speak of his childhood, but I know he's traumatized and I can see it troubles him"}
{"id": "t3_232o9j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [21] of 2 years wants to get blackout drunk at parties, I [M 23] am not comfortable with this.", "post": "Hey everyone, my girlfriend doesn't go out a lot but when she does start drinking she has a hard time stopping and goes too far and gets black out drunk. She has promised me on multiple occasions that she wasn't going to over do it with the drinking but still drank way too much. As her boyfriend, I feel uncomfortable when she is that intoxicated around other guys because she is vulnerable and her friends have proven in the past that they don't look out for her if she gets into a bad situation. \n\nAm I being a crazy, over protective boyfriend for not wanting her to get so drunk at parties, concerts, etc.? What could be a solution that is fair to her?", "summary": "Girlfriend gets too drunk at parties and it makes me uncomfortable. How can I solve this problem while still being fair to her?"}
{"id": "t3_2atpt4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20 F) had a MissCarriage with my (25 M) BF a year ago, I feel EMPTY and, I want to try to have a baby. he doesn't. Advice?", "post": "When i was 16 i had an abortion with my ex boyfriend. \nliving with guilt, \ntwo years later my boyfriend (23 M) and i (18 F) (being together for a year or so) at the time ended up being pregnant.\nAt first he wanted to have an abortion. \nI could not live with myself if i would have agreed to do so.\n2 months pass by and we have never been so in love. it was the holiday season and on christmas eve i began to bleed. i went to the ER and the doctors told me everything was fine and sent me home. (i saw a sonogram that day) Also that day he was not present due to being at work,\nthe day after christmas, i misscarried.\ni have never felt so empty in my life.\ni am sad whenever i see a baby, or an infant \nI want to have a child, but whenever i tell him he just says \"not right now\" or \"maybe when i'm 30\"\nwe have been together for about 2.5 years now. But this may be a deal breaker for me because of how i feel and how much i love him and want him to have my children.", "summary": "Me and my boyfriend had a misscarriage 1.5 years ago, i want to try again, he doesn't. might be a deal breaker later on."}
{"id": "t3_4pfr52", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (28F) with my (32F) sister. She has been struggling to get pregnant for well over a year. My husband and I started trying and I'm pregnant within the month. How can I approach this with sensitivity without overthinking everything?", "post": "Hi reddit! I've created this new account for anonymity. \n\nMy sister and I have a good relationship despite living half way around the world from one another. I recently found out I was pregnant and figured I shouldn't overthink it and just tell her as I would have told her in the past (before knowing about her visits with fertility doctors etc). She responded very sweetly and is texting me asking several excited questions and there doesn't seem to be any weirdness at all. She seems genuinely thrilled that I'm going to be a mum!\n\nHowever, I'm still a little worried and overthinking things in my head. I am worried that deep down she is sad and how I should best respect her feelings without making it an issue. The fertility issues she is having would have stayed between her and her husband had it not been for an awkward visit with my mother. My mum visited her (my parents also live in a different country.) and she had to tell my mum because there were so many secret appointments etc. My mum is not the most tactful person and rather than understand it was a private issue just got incredibly excited they were trying, to the point that when she left their house she left a note and candles in their bedroom wishing them luck. Cringe. So my sister and I have been bonding over how cheesy our mum is being.\n\nI'm looking for advice on how to go forward. Should I just pretend that everything is normal and follow her cues? Should I be more sensitive about the subject because of what she is going through?\n\nI can't help but feel guilty. I wasn't going to share with her how long we were trying but when she asked I couldn't lie to her. I feel awful that I got to tell the family happy news before she could. I feel guilty as a little sister to be pregnant before my big sister who deserves it so much. I started trying because it's the right time in my life but I was prepared for it to take much longer! I can't help but wish I had waited a little longer until she could have her moment.", "summary": "My big sister has been trying to get pregnant for a long time. I started trying with my husband and I am pregnant almost immediately. I want to approach the subject with sensitivity but without overthinking."}
{"id": "t3_3138pp", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "A friend from my old high school asked me to prom, but I really would rather not go.", "post": "I'm a freshman in college and a friend of mine texted me last week and asked if I would be her back up date to her senior prom. I explained that I would be getting my wisdom teeth out at the end of May, and I very well may not be able to go so I can't promise anything, so I would have to be her backup.\n\nHowever, a guy in her grade asked her and she really didn't want to go with him, so she made up this story about how she was trying to work something out with a guy from the next town over, but I was her back up in case it didn't \n\nShe asked me if I would be cool going with her because if she went with someone else from her grade it would look bad. What should I say to her? I actually might be getting my wisdom teeth out during that time so I don't know. I don't want to leave her hanging but I've been to six proms and I think I've had my fill.", "summary": "A friend of mine asked me to go to prom with her and to spare someone else's feelings, she asked me to go with her, but I don't want to. What should I tell her?"}
{"id": "t3_4ol1pf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by water skiing and tubing all weekend", "post": "I spent the whole weekend at my buddy's lake house with a few friends, most of which was out on the boat. Now, this was my first time at a lake house and doing all these cool lake house things. I was dying to wakeboard/water ski since I am big into skateboarding and longboarding. I assumed that I'd pick it up pretty quickly considering my experience in other balance related activities. And what do you know, I did pretty well. We took turns on the skis and also battled it out on tubes as well. \nHowever the fuck up comes in this entire week because I did *not* take into account the muscle strength it takes to hold on for your fucking life when being dragged behind a boat like that. And we were out there all damn day. So I've barely had the muscle strength in my forearms to grip just about anything. Opening the fridge? Nope, grabbing my backpack? Fucking nope. Anything requiring flexing my fingers? Absolutely not. It's been almost a week and it's finally getting to the point where I can function normally again.", "summary": "I water skied and tubed behind a boat all weekend and spent the next week in writhing pain whenever I try to grip something."}
{"id": "t3_cib12", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "friend zone: not sure if the girl i like has attraction to me", "post": "His, \n\nI have known that girl for over 3 years and it's only a year ago that I understood that I am very attracted to her, more than just a friend. In the meantime she has gotten a boyfriend and i really don't know how to act now. \n\nWhat worsens things is that I am pretty shy and nerdy, and since more reactive than initiative. She is the type of girl though who expects initiative in a relationship. \n\nI told her about my feelings and we have never touched this theme since. The furtherst we've gone physically is holding each other's hands and hugging but I am not sure if it's more a courtesy of friendship. She did mention that she is not that much satisfied with her current relationship, though she tries avoiding exclusive hang-outs with me inviting others because \"it's more fun\".\n\nI am not sure what would be the best way to go now. Most of all I want to  know if she has some deeper feelings to me. The reason is that I would hate ruining our friendship by pushing too far. But how could I find it out, revealing it in a conversation is not an option since it would be too selfish and I guess she is equally unsure about my intentions. And I think that staying by friends and seeing what happens   I will just be locked in the friend zone.", "summary": "i have feelings for my friend who has a boyfriend. how to find out her feelings towards me without ruining our friendship?"}
{"id": "t3_4krcrj", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is it normal that we haven't had a fight? I'm [19/f] and he's [23/m]", "post": "Hi guys. I'm currently in an LDR with a really amazing guy. It's pretty fresh, although we've known each other for over a year. We started dating at the beginning of this year, so we've been together 4-5 months give or take. I realize it's fresh and all, and maybe I just need to give it time, but we haven't had a single argument, fight, or disagreement. I mean, it's not that I *want* one, it's just that I find it odd.\n\nIs it normal? I know everyone says arguing in relationships is completely normal, some people say it's abnormal to *not* fight, but we just haven't. We're both pretty mature and rational, we're both kinda loners and don't do much besides working and talking to each other, and we have quite a lot in common, so I guess there really isn't any reason for us *to* fight but I just feel like it's kinda weird.", "summary": "in the 4-5 months we've been together my bf and I haven't had a single fight or argument or anything, and I'm curious as to if it means anything other than we have a pretty chill relationship"}
{"id": "t3_318tb4", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIP my friend by grounding him", "post": "The Background:\nYou read it right, I didn't get him grounded, I actually grounded him. This particular friend has really strict parents, especially when it comes to grades, and they only allow him to have a B in one class, with everything else being A's, or they ground him.\nEvents Leading to the Prank:\nNow, I don't usually pull any pranks, but he knocked a full, heavy water bottle onto my shoeless foot (by accident). I demanded an apology, and when he refused, I vowed to prank this hooligan.\nThe Setup:\nI got another friend to get his phone (he has a really shit slide phone, but that has nothing to do with anything) and give it to me. Then, like a government hacker, I set to work trying to figure out how the fuck that not-smartphone worked. I managed to switch his mother's contact to my name (now you see where this is going) but he got the phone back before I could put my number under his mom's name! This was all going on at the beginning of class, and when class started I didn't know how I would finish the prank. But the April Fool must have smiled upon me, because lo and behold, a fire drill saved the day! Turns out that some other kids had taken his phone since he had gotten it back from me, so I told them I was pranking him, and they gave me the phone to finish my work. I finally finished and the phone was returned to him.\nThe Execution:\nYou can probably guess what happened next. As his mom (more like his dictator) I texted him and said that his grade in chemistry had gone down to a B due to a test which he thought he did badly on, and that he could forget about doing anything over spring break. I had him going for a good while, until he got a text from me (actually his mom) telling him he had to pay for his broken retainer and that she would be picking him up soon. I guess he pieced it together then, and when he cursed me out over text, I knew it was over because he would never curse at his supreme leader. Prank successful, imo", "summary": "I pranked my friend by putting my number under his moms contact and grounded him for spring break. He figured it out when his mom texted him under my name."}
{"id": "t3_53fxiq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my BF [27M] 3 months, sometimes guys hit on me in front of my BF and insult him in the process. How to react in the moment and afterwards?", "post": "Hi Reddit,\n\nSorry if this isn't the right place for this. I think I saw a thread with a similar question but I can't seem to find it now so any advice is appreciated.\n\nI started seeing my BF about 3 months ago and he is really incredible. He's witty and kind and I find him incredibly, incredibly handsome and dashing. I think I'm a fairly average looking woman and get hit on from time to time, but I've noticed that it has gotten more aggressive or nasty with my boyfriend around? When a guy hits on me, I'll usually just say thank you but I'm not interested or I have a boyfriend. If my boyfriend is there with me, some guys will give him a full once over and say something along the lines of \"This guy?\" or \"You're outta his league\" or \"I could show you a better time\". Something completely disrespectful to my bf. I don't know where it's coming and he doesn't usually react. I'm not the most confident person so I'll usually just say that was rude or ignore it, but I want to know how I could react or what I could do to reassure my bf in those times. I know if it were me, I'd probably be a bit self conscious or upset but he hasn't said anything. I've tried to bring it up but he brushes it off like it isn't a big deal and maybe it isn't. I don't want to make it seem like a big deal if he's actually not upset, but I also want to make sure he's feeling good about us after this.\n\nSorry for the rambling! So people of reddit, I'm just wondering how you would like your SO to respond to those guys or what you'd like him/her to do afterwards or say to make you feel secure in the relationship.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Guys hit on me in front of bf and insult him in the process. How to react/respond and reassure bf that he's my jam!"}
{"id": "t3_3nj93z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 F] feel like I deserved to get hit by my dad.", "post": "First off, I'm on mobile so sorry for any errors.\n\n I've been dating my current boyfriend for 3 and a half years and things are going great between us. We're both seniors in college and we're just honestly so excited to see what life has in store for the both of us. But I'll just admit this here: I've been sneaking him in so we can spend alone time with each other. My parents didn't know any of this was happening until my dad came home super early from work Friday and caught us. I was in the shower while my boyfriend was in my room, which is downstairs. I opened the window and made him hop my fence before my dad could see him. Needless to say, my dad and my mom have been very disappointed in me (for good reason) but my dad built up his anger against me and let it all go today. When he drove us home from the baby shower my sisters and I went to, he yelled at me for not picking up my phone whe he called it. My excuse  (albeit a bad one I admit) was that I was helping my aunt and the rest of my family clean up their apartment's party room after the baby shower and I couldn't feel my phone vibrate. When we got home, he made faces at me (like he always does when he's angry at someone) he then asked me who came over Friday. I told him that it was a guy. He asked more questions like how long has this been going on, and why did he leave without seeing him. I answered him like \"a while now\" and \"because I was scared about what you would say\". I was crying a little at this point because I was just so scared of him and thats when he lunged at me with his fist. Thankfully my mom came just in time and I told her what happened.\n\nI understand I did something wrong and I really should have told my dad I was dating someone. Because of all these lies and shit I said and done I feel like I really deserved to get punched. I'm also really scared now and I just don't know what to do from here.", "summary": "Dad caught me sneaking in my bf of 3.5 years, bottled in his anger until today, tried to punch me but feel like I deserved it. I'm scared to deal with him right now. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_1xr4b1", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "[NSV] Finally broke the compulsive eating cycle", "post": "I've been struggling for some time with compulsive overeating habits. I've been sticking to a reasonable 1,700 calorie diet over the last 5 weeks with the aim of making a lifestyle change and hoping that, as a result, my weight would drop too. This morning I finally stepped on the scale and saw I was worthy of my first flair (after 5 weeks) yay!\n\nBut then I had a crappy day at work, ate too much for lunch and on the way home all I could think about was a giant, comforting meal of  pizza, or french fries, or mac and cheese, or Chinese food, or anything fatty and greasy. When I got home, my roommate even asked if I wanted to order dinner later and I initially said yes. Then I thought long and hard about what I really wanted. I wanted something that made me feel cozy and comforted, that was warm and rich. So I changed into my favorite pjs, fired up the kettle, made myself a giant mug filled with chicken broth, and curled up in bed. As I sipped the broth, my bad mood passed, I felt satisfied, and no longer wanted take out or crappy food. I made myself a giant salad for dinner instead.", "summary": "When cravings hit, think about what the food you're craving really represents. Have a healthy option (food or otherwise) on hand that can fulfill the same purpose."}
{"id": "t3_xy4au", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I am in the financial and insurance industry, but is looking to go back to school to become a vet.  Any suggessions?", "post": "I'm not 100% sure if I have what it takes to make this huge change, but I feel like being a Veternarian is something I really want to do in life.  \n     A bit of background. I'm currently 24, graduated with a finance degree 3 years ago. I'm currently a financial rep focusing on selling insurance.  Even though I don't hate my job I feel like it doesn't fit my personality.  But I stuck with it for a while because I don't like to quit easily. The idea of becoming a vet happened when a chinchilla of mine \npassed because I didn't take it to the vet in time, and I really love \nanimals. People tell me I'm a warm person and great with kids and \nanimals. I feel like this is something I came up with myself and not what other want me to be.\n     So back to reality, I did a tiny bit of research on this. The closest grad school that has this program is Cornell university (I'm located in NY) I'd probably need to do an undergrad in science or medical field.  I'm a little unsure of 8 more years of school, but I guess if there's no other choice.  Another concern is money, I only have about 10k in bank, I cannot touch my retirement and life insurance money. I'm not sure if I can qualify for any federal grant. I may also need to move back with my parents. One idea I have is to just brokage product with high residuals while I wait to get into a school. I'll also appraciate any insight and experiences from a vet or a person going back to school.", "summary": "I'm a finance major out of college for 3 years and wants to go back to school to become a vet, am I nuts?"}
{"id": "t3_1xzflt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] 1 year, LDR trial separation", "post": "I need to get this off my chest and get some advice from the community.\n\nMy gf and I have been doing long distance for about 5 months and dating for 1 year. We will be living in the same city again come June hence why we decided to give a LDR a try. \n\nThe time we spend together has been great and we usually see each other for long weekends every couple of weeks. \n\nA few months ago I found out that my gf cheated on me (she kissed another guy in a club). I decided to give her a last chance but if I'm entirely honest, since it happened I have not taken the relationship as seriously as I used to. \n\nThis weekend, I went down to see her (hadn't seen her in 3 weeks). I got her flowers, chocolates and a card for valentine's day. She spent most of the day with her friends and I didn't even get a card in return. In the evening I cooked her a nice dinner, then we had a bit of a fall out and she spent the rest of the evening hanging out with friends. \n\nNeedless to say, this morning I was pretty fed up and have initiated a 2 week \"trial break-up\". She was really upset. We won't be talking for 2 weeks and will then meet up to decide whether to end it or continue.\n\nAm I being perfectly reasonable here or am I just being overly sensitive? Obviously I love her to bits and the text above is only really showing her in bad light - but these are the things I'm picking up on. Our sex life isn't great either. She has a slight cold and so there was no love making this weekend (even after not seeing each other for 3 weeks).", "summary": "1 year relationship, LDR for last 5 months. Things have been going downhill so just initiated a 2 week \"trial break-up\"."}
{"id": "t3_3k1lcg", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Would like some advice and help on an apology based on depressive behavior and women ,to women. Women who have had depression would be a HUGE help", "post": "About a year and a half ago, I found I hand depression. Now depression to a person that has never had it and just hears it might label it as being sad and angry and down alot. \nDepression is actually much more than that, and it is hard to explain so I have a link here on 13 things to remember about a person with depression \n\nBasically, without creating an excuse, I was a bit rude,pushy and angry plus other things to some wonderful ladies I have met. One who has been absolutely incredible and I appreciate so much. I like talking to them and hanging out with them when I can. They have helped alot, I am getting better \n\nI dont ask here because I would not treat a women different when apologizing or that I want to sound stupid, I just want them to feel like my apology was genuine not like im giving them crap and will still be that way. What does everyone suggest I say? Do I tell them I have depression?", "summary": "Was rude to great ladies, found I had depression and want to apologize so they understand what I have been going through and know im not giving them crap ,need help"}
{"id": "t3_eate4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's the stupidest thing that you've done that has caused, or could have caused a severe injury to you?", "post": "With me, it just happened yesterday.  I woke up early in the morning with sharp stomach pains, thinking I had to pee or something and that my bladder was just too full.  After going to the bathroom it still hurt really bad and I was literally sobbing.\n\nI didn't want to go to urgent care because I was sure they'd send me home saying I just had super bad gas or something else embarrassing.  Thankfully my boyfriend talked me into it, and upon finding that Urgent care wasn't open yet we went to the ER and got there within an hour after my pains started.  After getting there they started to calm down, so now I was even more sure that it was somethign dumb and I was just going to be embarrassed.\n\nAfter getting bloodwork done and a cat scan, the doctor comes in and informs me that I have appendicitis and need my appendix removed.  I was in surgery by 12:30 and have been on pain killers since yesterday and will be released either tonight or tomorrow.\n\nSo, if it wasn't for my boyfriend being more stubborn than me I could have had my appendix rupture and died, since we only have one car and he brought me to the hospital 20 minutes before he would have had to leave for work.", "summary": "I had appendicitis and didn't want to go to the hospital because I was embarrassed thinking it was just horrible menstrual cramps or gas or something, but my boyfriend made me and I got it removed on time."}
{"id": "t3_1dzbn2", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Confused virgin, initiating everything with girlfriend, feeling bad afterwards.", "post": "Okay....so me and this girl, we've been dating for two months now. She's a virgin, and I'm a virgin. Hell, she's so innocent, it's not even funny.\n\nBut, we've recently started to get a lot more physical. From about the second week, we've been sleeping together. As in, we would cuddle and then sleep in the same bed. We might make out a little bit, but it was mostly the cuddling and the sleeping.\n\nThen, I started with the dry-humping, and she reciprocated, and clothes started coming off. Only above the waist, however. I quickly learned how to properly take off a bra.\n\nAnd then, just within this last week, we moved to third base. It started with me rubbing outside of the shorts she wore to bed, and then I asked if she minded me moving inside the shorts, and she said no, so I did. And she's given me a handjob before too. Mostly, though, I feel like it's been me.\n\nAnd I want it, in the moment. And she wants it--she never hasn't wanted it. But, afterwards, I always feel like shit. I wouldn't say I regret it, but I feel like a bad person. I feel bad for initiating it, and for almost pushing the boundaries.\n\nI guess, what I'm asking here more than anything, is that should this be happening? Is this one of those things that should just *feel* right from the moment you're doing it? Like, when you're doing it and when you're not? As bad as this sounds, could it be a sign that she's not really \"the one\" and that, knowing that, I should break up with her?", "summary": "I've initiated all of the physical stuff with my girlfriend, because I feel it in the moment, but don't afterwards. Is this something that I should break up with her over?"}
{"id": "t3_z75xr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Bestfriend [M/19] gets girlfriend, drops me [F/19] like a rock", "post": "We've been friends for about 4(ish?) years. We've always been pretty close. Unfortunately, whenever he gets a girlfriend he starts ignoring me. This time is worse than usual though, since we're both in college in different states.\n\nBasically, this summer we took a class at my school (cheaper for him since his school is out of state) and he stayed at my house (because gas). Class lasts a month. When the class ends, he goes back to school and I pretty much haven't heard from him since. \n\nIts been a month, and I've tried texting him and calling him but he ignores me. He called once to say he was sorry and make excuses (he's \"busy\") and he referenced things I told him in my text messages, so obviously he's reading them, but just not bothering to respond.\n\nI just don't understand what's going on with him. I go from talking to him every day to being completely cut off. I can't just talk to him about it because he'll just ignore me. I don't know if its because he's got a gf now so he doesn't need meanymore, or if we're just doing the whole \"growing apart\" thing way more rapidly than I expected. \n\nI really just want to get some perspective on this, because its really upsetting me. Also, last school year he didn't have a girlfriend and we talked pretty much every day. So I'm just assuming this has something to do with her.", "summary": "Best friend gets girlfriend, goes to school in another state. Goes from talking to me every day to ignoring me for a month."}
{"id": "t3_4wwbp1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16 M] want to supportmy grieving girlfriend[15F] after an abortion, but she wants space.", "post": "I understand that she needs space to grieve, and that she needs to come to grips with what happened, after the abortion, i was her only shoulder to cry on,of course her parents were there to support and talk to, but she didn't want to due to fear, shame and embarrassment. \n\nSo after the abortion we thought it would be a breeze, that wasn't the case, it happened around 3/4 months ago and our relationship hasn't been the same, for around 3 months after it was constant battling at eachother and tears of what happened but i'd always support her.\n\nMy mum and a close friend have told me to not text her at all, wait for her to come to, open the door, then come in and pick everything up again. But i had to text her and just let her know im waiting for her and would never abandon her, any hour of the day i would be here. The reason im worrying is because she has one therapy session a week, and she doesn't talk to her mum about it as much as she should, she's even admitted shes depressed and i could see it.\n\nHer exact reply to my text was \"That definitely put a smile on my face! So nice to hear that fro you, you mean everything to me still and just for you to understand that honestly makes me the happiest person alive\"\n\nThe problem is, i don't want her bottling everything up and not speaking to anyone, i hate knowing she could be sat upset, feeling alone, and of course i don't want,after all this space, her to think i was never here from her, feelings to go,and to get a wrong impression of me.\n\nWhat shall i do?\nShould i call or text her at all?\nShould i just let her come to me?\nThanks!", "summary": "How do i support my girlfriend who went through an abortion, who wants space but could be getting worse, or better..?"}
{"id": "t3_35gg52", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So I just found out my girlfriend is unhappy in our relationship [4-1/2 yrs, 24/m 23/f]", "post": "I really hope you guys can help me on this one.\n\nSo I'm very technology savvy. I have worked in computer repair and the IT field for the last 7 years.\n\nI met my girlfriend her freshmen year of college (I was a sophomore transfer) and we've been dating each other our entire college career. She's graduating this year (I graduated last year and came back for an MS). I worked on her computer about a month ago because it was running slow, freezing, etc. so I looked at it over a night. While I had her computer, my curiosity got the best of me.\n\nI found myself in a junk folder that had a lot of misc stuff in it, under which I found a pro-con list that turned out to be about myself; the things she liked (pros) and the things she didn't like (cons). I saw it and it kind of shook me up. I didn't sleep well that night, as I drempt she broke up with me. The next morning I told her about the dream. She consoled me and said she wasn't breaking up with me anytime soon.\n\nMoving on, I found she had created an account on a dating advice forum, and I found all of her posts. The first ones were from back when she was in high school. Later on she posted about us. The most recent one was a day before our four year anniversary. It was asking for advice on how to break up with me because she is no longer happy in the relationship. In it she states that some of her friends and family have been telling her to break up with me for well over a year. We're involved in a lot of the same things, so it would be awkward for both of us to break up.\n\nIt's now 8 months later. I have never seen any signs from her personally that she is displeased with our relationship. I love her so much, but now that I've seen this, I feel she just puts up a front to make me happy and not make life a living hell while we still spend time together.", "summary": "I found out my girlfriend isn't happy in our relationship anymore and I don't know whether to talk to her and let her know that I now know she isn't happy, or just let things continue until she decides to end things."}
{"id": "t3_2ny6b4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (19 M) Girlfriend (17 F) of 3 years reveals that she was much more sexually active before we dated than I previously thought. How do I get over this?", "post": "I know its stupid and I know its just sex but Ive never felt so much grief in my entire life. I guess I feel this way because she was my first and only and knowing that she's been with kind of hurts.  \n\nI feel stupid for feeling so upset about it.  How do I get over it so I can move on with our relationship?  I don't even see her the same since she told me and I feel like I'm pathetic for not being 100% okay.\n\nShe's already given me an STD but I just assumed it was s fluke because she told me she'd only had sex 3 other times.\n\nHelp please", "summary": "girlfriend lied about how sexually experienced she was, a lot more than what I thought.  How do I get over this?"}
{"id": "t3_xek76", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "X-post from r/relationships: [Throwaway] My housemate has been evicted, but seems to be refusing to collect his stuff. What now? (United Kingdom)", "post": "Am located in the UK. \n\nTwo weeks ago, my housemate was evicted after a spate of horrible behaviour and 'forgetting' to pay his rent. The landlord is taking him to court over the late rent payments (which amount to several thousand pounds), which he didn't think he'd have to pay if he moved out right away.\n\nHe has left everything apart from his laptop. That includes bedding, clothes and loads of personal items that I'm sure are worth a lot of money. He doesn't seem to understand that he needs to come and get it, saying that he'll \"come when he wants\". As far as I know, he hasn't even contacted any housing agencies to try and get a new place.\n\nI don't want to be stuck with his stuff until he finds a new place; I have new tenants moving in! I've contacted the city council but they just said to wait and see if he came to get it, which wasn't really helpful.\n\nDoes Reddit have any advice at all? Anything would help!\n\nThe general consensious on r/relationships is to box it up and leave in on the curb after a set date. Does this sound okay?", "summary": "Housemate evicted 3 weeks ago, didn't take his stuff. Doesn't seem to see why he should come to get his stuff. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_y2y8u", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, What is the craziest/most hilarious thing you have done with your immediate family?", "post": "So being a kid about to leave for college in a week, I was just thinking of all the ridiculous things that have gone on with my family and friends. One of the main things that still sticks in my mind is the one time that my dad took the entire family on vacation up to a lake in Central PA. On the last night, my dad had gotten properly drunk with some of the locals. On his way back he insisted that we go \"quilling\". \nFor those not familiar with this sport, it involves a car, a bunch of drunk friends, some towels, and a shit load of porcupines. Basically, my dad convinced my mom to drive around backroads at about 230 in the morning trying to find porcupines. When we saw some on the road, my friend and i would jump out, chase them down and whip them with towels to see how many of their quills we could get. (their quills grow back and its painless for them, bring on PETA). All in all we came back with 200 some quills and a bunch of good memories.", "summary": "Dad got smacked with townies, convinced my mom to take us to whip porcupines with towels, to gather theirs quills at 2am. Ended up getting around 200, For science!"}
{"id": "t3_19nvyd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I[22M] Completely hung up on friend[25F]", "post": "Hey Reddit!\n\nSo, for some back story I've been going out with this girl for sometime. We met about a year ago, went out a few times, i'd say we hit it off and I definitely liked her. We decided not to \"date\" for a few different reason but did the friends with benefits thing for a few months. She ended up trying to see someone else a few months ago and contact pretty much stopped between us. We would talk here and there, all started by me, but that was it for the most part.\n\nAround mid January we started to casually do things again. Turns out what she was doing with this other guy didn't work out and I was happy because I had my friend back. We have since gone out a few times and some of the nights we even ended up hooking up again. Coming to last weekend, we went out and at the end of the night it was awkward. I tried to initiate a kiss with her and she didn't want much to do with it. The next day we talked for a while through text, and decided that were good friends and doing things probably isn't going to end up well, which i agree with.\n\nMy problem though is that I am so hung up on her. I definitely have more feelings for her than she realizes and i'm in a strange spot and have no idea what to do. She is an extremely important person to me, and I don't want her out of my life but I am killing myself with these thoughts and feelings that I keep having. I know i have to \"man up\" and get over it, but how am I supposed to do it when we are good friends, and I don't want to stop talking or hanging out with her in that capacity?", "summary": "Hung up on a friend, no idea how to handle it. Don't want to lose her and still want to be friends with her but it's hard and I don't know how to handle it."}
{"id": "t3_gqtda", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, can you help? Bridesmaid trying to get to wedding that starts nr Baton Rouge in eight hours, stranded in Memphis due to cancelled flight.", "post": "Writing this from London, feeling completely helpless. Two of my friends are getting married later today near Baton Rouge, Louisiana, and one of the bridesmaids is currently stuck in Memphis due to the bad weather. Her flight was cancelled last night, she's been on stand by for flights all morning. At the moment, Delta are trying to get her on a flight to Atlanta and then on to Baton Rouge, but it won't get her there until very late in the day and there's a good chance she'll miss the wedding. Still not confirmed that she has a place on the plane from Atlanta...\nCan anyone help?", "summary": "bridesmaid stuck in Memphis, trying to get to bestfriend's wedding this afternoon nr Baton Rouge. Need help!"}
{"id": "t3_16pxuv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "F[24] in a long distance relationship with M[23]; How do I deal with this?", "post": "My boyfriend of two years and I had been in a long distance relationship even before I came to settle in California. But before I settled in this country (for my mom's sake) we were doing okay with the distance. I occasionally visit his country when I have the time and the frequency of our skype chats were on a daily basis.\n\nHe hated the idea that I had stay here because I have mommy issues. We were okay on my first week here but then he started to drift apart. He doesn't even go online anymore or even try to on most days. He tells me that he's busy with school work and that he wants to pass this semester so that he can graduate. Although before he makes it a point to say hello and chat. Now, I do all the effort with long distance texting but he doesn't seem to want to reply to me so we could talk about it again.\n\nIt's sad that he's not putting effort anymore and I need advice on how to deal with this. Should I break up with him? \n\n(He also had problems expressing himself and I think he'd want me to break it off rather than he do this. )", "summary": "My boyfriend and I are on LDR and he's being distant now that I've moved again. How do I deal with this?"}
{"id": "t3_35n1sw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(23/f) I have a huge crush (33/m) on my ex-teacher. Went out on a date and fucked up REALLY REALLY BAD. Should I apologize or chalk it up as a loss?", "post": "We flirted all throughout class in the most passive ways and then I asked him out on the last day and he said sure! We went to this bar and I got too drunk off of two drinks. I don't usually drink hard alcohol and he said I could have beer but for some reason I said \"No, that's fine\" and proceeded to drink gin and absinthe ... I DON\"T KNOW WHY I DID THIS. I really like him. He is so intelligent and sexy.. Then I got too drunk and started saying everything that is awful. Like how I didn't like the kids in our class, I live with my parents, my parents have money, how I *WASN'T* planning on telling him about all this. JESUS CHIST. And this is only the stuff I remember. I texted him when I got him and told him I had a good time and we should do it again. He said he did too and sure. I'm not sure he's just saying that or....? I asked him to go to coffee Sunday (yesterday) and the event happened Monday. I know really close together, but I wanted to apologize to his face. Should I? Like:\n\nI am so sorry for Monday. I am embarrassed. I think you are intelligent, interesting and sexy and I would like to get to know you more. Please don't judge me on Monday and go to the art museum or zoo or something before you leave the state? \n\nIf he doesn't text back in a week is a text apology as a last resort ok? \n\nYes, I wrote it out. I am so fucking embarrassed...", "summary": "went on a date with a 33yr old I am hardcore crushing on, got way too drunk, shared too much, should I apologize? What if it's just over text?"}
{"id": "t3_z7qb4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[17/M]How do I start a conversation with a girl[16/m] who goes to my school and climbing gym.", "post": "I joined a rock climbing gym over the summer and climbed a month before school started. When I first started to go there I saw this girl but didn't have any feelings for here. School then started up and noticed that she went to my school. I pass her in the halls a few times a day, which is always a little awkward when I kinda know someone but never really talked to them. One day out of no where I just started to really like the way this girl acted and looked, I have no idea why. I want to talk to her but I don't want to come off as forcing a conversation or some creep.", "summary": "How to start a relationship with a girl I know at my school and gym I've never talked to without seeming weird."}
{"id": "t3_31hby0", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Feeling really empty for the past little while.", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nI'm an 18 year old high school student who's in their final year. About 2 months ago I was accepted to my dream school, and as such I'll be going off their in August. I'm extremely happy about it, it's one of the best schools in my country, and the place itself is beautiful. Needless to say, this relatively early university acceptance was a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders. \n\nBut for whatever reason, I can't find it in myself to be happy. Most kids my age would be ecstatic and hopeful for the future. And while I am happy that I'll be moving out on my own, I can't help but feel incredible emptiness. Every night I just waste away the day browsing internet forums or listening to music. My usual hobby of videogames can't grip me like it used to; any time I try a new game I lose interest after a few hours, maybe a few days if I'm lucky. The only thing that can hold my attention for more than a few days is reading books, but even with that, I have to take a break every half hour or else I zone out.\n\nDo you guys have any advice for me? I have nothing to be sad about, my life is great as it is, but at the same time I don't feel happy about anything. I usually feel comfortable with my friends, but we've been talking less and less recently, due to conflicting schedules at school.", "summary": "18 year old male student got accepted into fantastic university, life seems incredibly boring and empty for the past few months, what do?"}
{"id": "t3_1jm5pi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26M] just started a new relationship, but not sure if I can trust her [26F]. Is this a red flag?", "post": "So I met this girl at my best friends wedding two months ago. We really hit it off and I went to visit her across the country a week ago. I'm head over heels for her, but I don't want to get hurt.\n\nA particular situation is nagging at me though. Last night she went to a movie in the park with her neighbor and his friend. I met them on my journey out there and thought they were weird but harmless.\n\nShe tells me today that they all got pretty drunk and one of the guys was hitting on her, the neighbor kept trying to put his arm around her, and one of their friends tried to make a move to kiss her at the end of the night. She said that she declined all of these advances and I don't have any reason to doubt her, but what bothers me the most is that the she let the guy who tried to kiss her sleep on her couch.\n\nShe says she's only interested in me and that she found those guys, desperate and creepy, but it bothers me that she didn't see it to begin with and that she didn't just flat out kick them out of her apartment. Is she just overly flirty/nice. Is this a red flag?\n\nI already have trust issues and the LDR thing is compounding them. I'd love to have an honest discussion about it, but don't want to seem controlling or overly jealous.", "summary": "new relationship and possible red flags. Neighbors came on to her and her friend and even though she said she denied their advances if bothers me that she let it get as far as it did."}
{"id": "t3_192mfi", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Feeling discouraged and a little lost - Need some advice.", "post": "I'm sure these types of posts crop of from time to time, so I apologize if you've seen this all before.\n\nI'm looking for a little advice.  To begin, I'll give you some background information.  I graduated in 2002 and joined the Air Force.  While I was in, I worked on Radar Jamming Pods and their Test Stations.  I was young and it was my first time away from home, so I didn't pursue my Associates like I should have.  I was Honorably Discharged in 2006 and I moved back home.\n\nJanuary 2007, I enrolled in the local community college and started an AAS in Biotechnology.  I gave up on that, changed my major, and instead, graduated with an AAS in Electronics Engineering Technologies in May 2010.  I looked for work in my field, but ended up as a Shipping Supervisor for a bakery in October 2010.  I'm still here.\n\nWhat I'm looking for is direction...I want to work in a field relating to computers.  I've put off getting any Comptia Certs, because I don't know if they're worth the effort / money.  I just withdrew from CTU's Online program, due to time constraints and a lack of instruction from the courses I was taking.  I did take a Web Design course during my time there and I enjoyed it.\n\nShould I try and obtain a second AAS?  A Bachelor's degree program is likely out of my reach, due to work and money.\n\nI'm including my resume for any pointers you may have.\n\nThanks in advance; sorry for the wall of text.", "summary": "I need a new job.  I have some computer / IT experience and an AAS in Electronics Engineering Technologies with related military experience."}
{"id": "t3_uuast", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, when I was young I was tested for my IQ and I was told it was in the upper 140s. Nowadays, I don't feel as smart. Is video games really killing my intelligence?", "post": "When I was young- 1st grade, maybe even before, I was tested for my IQ. I remember how my parents used to be so proud to tell me that the doctor said I had a higher IQ than even his. I don't remember the exact number but I know it was in the upper 140s, likely 146. During most of grade school, I felt as if I was that intelligent. However, during my final year at high school and my years so far in college, I haven't felt so smart. My mind feels sluggish at times and it doesn't seem to react with the same speed it used to. It's like a hazy feeling that I should be able to think through a problem that's giving me issues and it takes a lot more effort than I'm used to. I don't know what to think of this but I try to brush it off as simply being out of practice with the subjects I'm thinking about. I don't know if this is really it though. I don't do many harmful activities- I only drink sparingly and I don't do drugs. I exercise daily and eat healthily. The only thing I really do is play a very very large amount of video games and be on my computer for hours. I saw a comment on another thread and it made me think about this again. So, what is my problem? Is there anything I can do to regain my sharpness and should I start cutting out my excessive hours of video games?", "summary": "I was told I was super smart and I always used to feel that way but for quite some time I don't, so is my excessive computer playing to blame?"}
{"id": "t3_1z57mr", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Getting a new job where I need to incorporate (S Corp) and am lost when it comes to taxes and salaries (and dividends, oh my!)", "post": "Hi /r/personalfinance! I'm going to be starting a new job soon at 130k a year, with a rather special circumstance. As part of the terms of me being hired, I need to set up a S Corp, and essentially be business to business in terms of the relationship with the company.\n\nI know it sounds super sketchy for a company to require me to do that, but it makes sense in context. I am 20 years old, and HR would never green light 130k for a 20 year old dude, so this is the solution that was proposed.\n\nI understand that I take on more taxes because of me being self employed (the other half of the taxes normally paid by the employer), but I am lost as to how to count anything. I should be paying myself a salary, and then paying the rest through dividends correct? Are there any sort of step by step guides on how to do this correctly?\n\nAlso, is there a way (short of sitting down with a CPA) to calculate my take home pay when counting dividends and federal/state/local taxes? I looked online at tax calculators, and they either seem too simple, or vary wildly. Some say that I would owe 10k total per year (seems too low) and some say that I would owe 50k total per year (seems wayyy to high).\n\nFurthermore (sorry for the wall of text), I'd like to setup some sort of retirement account (or accounts), but since I will be self employed I'm not sure what avenue to take.\n\nI have contacted a CPA in the area to setup an appointment to get incorporated, but was looking for some advice from more voices on the questions above. Thanks!", "summary": "20 year old dude got new job for 130k a year, and needs to setup S Corp. Not sure of what to do, or how to pay myself, or how to calculate my taxes, or how to handle retirement."}
{"id": "t3_275cl8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[19F] believe I am bi-sexual, should I come out? Identified to bf[20M], and I don't know how to proceed. [x-post from /r/sex]", "post": "Well. I will start off by saying that I told my SO that I thought I was bi-sexual today, and he seemed to treat it as water off a duck's back. I was thoroughly surprised since he is a little jealous sometimes when it comes to other men, but I guess he could just call it \"hot\" if he really isn't taking me seriously.\n\nAnyways, that's not the point, I was always a little curious, but never acted upon the fantasies I had. I always would think of women giving me oral, or I always thought that breasts were so nice, and kind of got turned on by them.\n\nHere is where things get a little complicated. I do believe I am bi-sexual, but never got the chance to act on it. Once when I was in high school me and one of my closest friends got drunkenly dared to kiss each other, and we did. What would she think if I came out as bi? And my best friend is gay, we never did anything, but would this complicate the relationship? I'm pretty scared to tell people- should I?\n\nAlso, some parts of my family aren't that accepting of non-heterosexual relationships, so if I came out, should I just keep it to my close circle of friends?\n\nHow would I go about it?\n\nI don't know what to do.", "summary": "I think I'm bi, and although my boyfriend doesn't care, I'm afraid my friends will because of history."}
{"id": "t3_2vnzp8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When should I [M24] offer to start paying for things at my girlfriends [F26] place? Or at all?", "post": "We've been together officially for a little over a month now, but have been dating for closer to four months. I've known her almost three years now.\n\nSince things became official I've been spending nearly all my time at her place. She gave me a key and has said that it's half my home too. So my dog and I are there now all the time. I still have my own apartment (six months left on the lease). We've talked some about me moving in, which will happen officially once my lease is up. But if I'm spending all my time at her place, using heat, water, electricity, etc... Shouldn't I help pay for something? Or is it too soon to talk about that kind of thing?\n\nHer internet is very slow DSL and she's off contract.. I've thought about offering to have my much faster cable internet moved to her place and just keep paying it myself.. Thoughts?", "summary": "Basically living with my girlfriend. When do I start offering to pay for utilities/etc at her place since I'm spending all my time there, even though I still have my own place?"}
{"id": "t3_30c9om", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Would you consider it unhealthy to hate people?", "post": "It's not like I'm talking about going around and murdering random people, but I don't have very many nice things to say about them.\n\nI think they are pieces of trash that are led by personal and selfish desires and if deemed necessary Would not hesitate to kill a motherfucker. So maybe I sort of lied about the murdering thing, but I really don't believe that people are worth keeping around. We sit around and manipulate each other until we get what we want. I see most people as mindless animals that are just taking up space and fucking each other so that they can produce more mindless garbage. It just sickens me to see and hear what people do to others.\n\nI mean sure there are the people who actually go out of their way to make a difference and try their best to be good people but I feel like those people are so few and far apart. I believe that all people have the potential to be amazing, but I also believe that people have the potential to be horrible monsters, and I think that most people go in the bad direction.\n\nI don't know, maybe I am just some dumb high-schooler (17 years old in case you were wondering) who is too stupid to see that people aren't shitty. Maybe you people can show me the way. Do you guys have any suggestions on how to not hate people?", "summary": "I absolutely hate people. Is this view unhealthy and if so is there something you can say that might change my mind?"}
{"id": "t3_2cmuvl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (16F) boyfriend (16M) hasn't gotten me a gift yet... our anniversary was a little over two weeks ago.", "post": "I don't know whether my being upset is valid or not, and I'd like some insight.\n\nOur 2 year anniversary was July 20th and I got him a cologne, a little bag of the candies he likes, and a new CD, along with a few more personal items. He has yet to get me anything, although we've made a plan on what he will get me. Our plan was to go to sephora together and he'd buy me $30 worth of products.\n\nIt sounded perfect to me. But we start to make plans before he gets his paycheck, and he always says he will have X amount left over for gas and my present. Yet every time he gets paid he doesn't have the money. He always says he is going to ask to borrow it from his parents/keep it from his paycheck but something always comes up and he can't take me. This has happened at least 3 times already. Honestly I've lost excitement in going because I feel like it's never going to happen.\n\nI can't bring it up to him because whenever I do he gets really upset and apologizes a lot, which I appreciate, but I just would rather him say that he can't take me (if that's the case) rather than continue to drag this out.\n\nI feel bad for being upset, because he's 16 on a 16 year old's paycheck. But it doesn't change the fact that he's been promising and not coming through, which is upsetting. \n\nI need an outsider's opinion so I can have some unbiased opinions to look through.", "summary": "Boyfriend planned to take me for anniversary present, hasn't, and is now a little over 2 weeks late with it."}
{"id": "t3_18if53", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "My fitness pal help needed.", "post": "I have just started a journey to a new an healthier me as I realised that turning 25 being 236lbs at 5'9\" was not a good way to end a year. \nI have been cooking healthier meals and working out almost daily for 25-35 mins of cardio, and I recently started using fitbit and MFP together. \nI am as honest as I can be without kitchen scales (which I am buying this weekend) about the weight of all the foods and therefore the calories that I am eating but I find that MFP is nagging at me to eat more. \nToday I have cooked a HUUUGE meal for lunchtime that I think would serve about three people. Lots of fresh veg, a bit of skinless chicken and some quiona, when I put the amount of food into MFP it tells me the calories are too low and I am putting my body into starvation mode, I am not sure I will be able to eat even half of this meal, but I am worried that if I don't eat more my body won't be able to repair itself.\nOn an average day I will eat about 1200 calories, consisting of porridge & honey for breakfast, lunch of a meat, veg and quinoa/couscous and dinner of fresh veg, meat and sometimes potatoes. \nI don't often find myself hungry and I drink about 2-3l of water a day, if I have less I get a massive headache from the central heating system. So I was wondering if anyone else finds MFP nagging at them to eat more calories. Even on the meals that I cheat with and have a pizza MFP is still telling me I am under my calorie limit although those days are the only days it doesn't nag me about starvation mode.", "summary": "MFP nags me to eat more calories, but I don't think I can whilst remaining in my healthy diet. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_2n1wm4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with men - Can't trust them", "post": "My relationships haven't worked out lately and I have realized that I have never NOT been cheated on by someone. I struggle with depression, have been to therapy, and know I am not always easy to be around but I know I don't deserve this. \n\nI am having an increasingly difficult time forming healthy relationships because I just don't trust men with my heart and in turn, I can't let my guard down and really let a relationship develop. My self-esteem is pretty wrecked, too. I am really unsure what to do because like everyone, I want connection and love. Advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Been cheated on in every relationship I have been on. Preventing me from forming healthy bonds and being able to trust any guy."}
{"id": "t3_20u6uh", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "NSV, I now take a bike and the stairs to work.", "post": "As far as my weight goes, the short story is that I somehow got to be over 260 pounds at 5'9\"-ish, and then lost about 80 pounds. That was a few years ago. I was in damn good shape. Could run, was thinking about joining the armed forces. Everything was awesome...\n\nA few years later, and I fell off. I turn 24 next week, and I was recently juuuuust over 300 pounds. I live almost exactly 100 miles north of New York City. Last semester IU started commuting to the city for work and school. I still live up north, because I have another job up there. Train tickets got expensive, so I saved money by biking instead of taking the subway.\n\nI only just started eating healthier a couple weeks ago, but I'm down about 10-15 pounds right now. Just hit 286, and I'm very happy. I know it isn't really progress, but it's nice to know that it's all improvement from here. I've done it before, and I can do it again. I know I won't let myself fall off.\n\nSo the first few times I took a bike a few miles from Grand Central Terminal to my job, only a few miles, I was so tired the next day. Mostly just my legs (Coat + Backpack didnt help >.<). Anyway, it has been getting easier, and I think now that it's warm I'll take up some weekend leisure rides. :)\n\nAlso, about 20 minutes ago, I took the elevator down to street level to go buy some food, and realized I forgot my wallet, which means I forgot my elevator key. I could have asked the door man, but instead just took the stairs 21 floors up. I was almost out of breath at the top, and I'm sure I will get muscle cramps tomorrow, but it was so worth it. :)", "summary": "I bike a few miles to work now, and finally took the stairs 21 flights up. Mostly just an \"I'm excited\" kinda post."}
{"id": "t3_g7y1e", "subreddit": "books", "title": "I'm going there: I cannot bring myself to finish LOTR.", "post": "**Notice: I mean no disrespect to fans so please don't take this the wrong way.**\n\n...but I'm more than open to having my mind changed if someone can explain to me what I'm missing.\n\nMy job has an hour-long commute, so I joined the library and have been going through podcasts and audiobooks like crazy. \n\nWhile sifting through their audiobook collection I saw they had all of the LOTR books, which I've never read -- I wanted to as a teenager but never got around to it. I never watched the movies because I wanted to read the books first because I'm a nerd like that. I knew absolutely nothing about the series other than the brief introduction I had to it while playing the Interplay LOTR adventure game on PC in the mid-90's for half an hour once.\n\nSo for the first few discs I found it a little monotonous. Lots of awkward singing by the narrator, lots of painfully long descriptions of the Shire and lots of genealogy for minor characters, which I found odd. But I assumed it'd pick up since I had 14 discs left to go.\n\nI'm currently on disc 9 (right as they're getting to Rivendell) but I absolutely cannot get interested in it, though not for lack of trying. Each commute it gets more difficult for me to keep listening rather than just throw on music or the news. Every time I get to a new disc I feel like I just finished several hours of homework and I have to bargain with myself to start the next one. \n\nIt's not that I don't like it. I like Tolkien's style, the characters are ridiculously well-developed and I can appreciate how groundbreaking it was in the 1950's...I just can't figure out what's so interesting and exciting about it to so many people, and I certainly can't imagine spending 50+ more hours finishing out the entire trilogy. \n\nCan someone change my mind before I bail and take it back to the library on Tuesday? \n\nIf it matters in your analysis, my normal taste is Philip K. Dick, Kurt Vonnegut, David Sedaris and non-fiction about science, politics and religion. My favorite book is Good Omens by Gaiman/Pratchett.", "summary": "Can't get into Lord of the Rings but I'm open to giving it another shot if someone can tell me why I should. "}
{"id": "t3_3an29p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my Boyfriend [22M] 4 years, he wants to move in together and I'm not ready.", "post": "So like the title says, we've been together 4 years, since we were 18 and all through our college years. Now that we've both graduated and are landing steady jobs we are looking to move out. He thinks it would make the most sense to move in together and has also mentioned getting engaged but not getting married for a while. I don't want to get engaged or married until my late 20s (that's always been my plan). I also side with my traditional mom and grandma who do not think moving in together is okay until we are at least planning a wedding. \n\nI can totally see myself marrying him if we are still together in several years. But I can also see things coming between us. I'm dead set on living in another country, and I might actually have to spend six months in another country within the next couple of years. He has always mentioned that he wants to stay in the town we live in now. I am also very chronically sick (nothing terminal, but sometimes debilitating) and he doesn't handle that very well when I'm going through a flare. \n\nI definitely love him with my whole heart and everyone thinks we're perfect together, but I'm still hesitant. How do I tell him I don't want to move in together and get engaged yet without hurting his feelings and making him think I don't love him?", "summary": "BF wants to get engaged and move in together, I don't but I don't want him to think I don't love him."}
{"id": "t3_3274j5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M/18] think my stepmother [F/44] is overstepping her boundaries", "post": "For the past couple of years my father [M/52] has been married to my stepmother [F/44] and I [M/18] think she is overstepping boundaries and is taking advantage of my father in many situations.\n\nNow, first of all, she isn't some horrible step mother, but she isn't great either. She doesn't have any kids of her own so she tries to punish me as if I was her kid, which my father allows. This would honestly not be a big deal, if she seemed sane...\n\nShe nitpicks at everything I do one week, and then loves me the next. The littlest thing can trigger her, such as what happened tonight.\n\nI ran out of batteries in my remote, so I replaced them with the batteries in my dad's remote, which were in his bedroom. I do this a lot, and then hide the used batteries somewhere obvious so he puts them in and then the remote still doesn't work.\n\nNothing happened for a while, so I assumed they just replaced the batteries, so I fell asleep. I was awakened to screaming and yelling and slamming of the opening of my door. My stepmother was yelling about how 'going into their room was an invasion of privacy'... I would understand that if the door was locked... Or closed... Or not wide open... Or if I was never allowed to go in there before... But, no. It had never been an issue before. She now told me that she doesn't trust me, and doesn't think she will be able to sleep in the same house as me...\n\nShe walked out, still yelling and shouting, and I told my father that I think it is essentially bullshit what she is doing, but all he does is nod and agree with her and say 'I need to stay on the same page as her. That's what a marriage is.'", "summary": "I can't stand this anymore, and I think my step mom is being manipulative of everyone around here. My father is letting it happen. She might not be sane."}
{"id": "t3_496gnp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my ex[20 F] did I handle this correctly?", "post": "So we broke up about 2 weeks ago after 4 months or so of dating because she said she wasn't feeling the way she did before to which I said fine but I would remove her from everything (not blocked or anything) we used as communication because I did not want to deal with the one sided feelings in order to get over it, she said for me to do whatever I need.\n\nThing is the past few days I've just been wondering was this the right thing to do? It was my first real relationship so I don't know if I come off like an asshole by doing what I did as i'd like to be friends with her later when feelings are not involved.", "summary": "broke up with first \"real\" gf 2 weeks ago or so, removed her from most things (not blocked) in order to get over this, am I justified in doing so or did I come off as an asshole?"}
{"id": "t3_2gteic", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by assuming the toilets in my building were \"fits it ships\" toilets", "post": "This happened a few months ago...\n\nI'm a grad student, so I work most weekends. This is important later. Over the summer, I had made it a habit of going poo in the second floor bathroom. It's a single toilet and the best in the building. Knowing I could easily clog my home toilet during my healthy eating binge and having heard from my male friends of the industrial flushing power of the campus toilets, I decided to make using this toilet my routine.\n\nUntil the fuck up. This one particular poo did not fit nor ship, thus rendering the toilet useless. It was a Friday afternoon, and the cleaning crew doesn't come in on the weekends. And Monday was a holiday. Ugh. Oh well, I thought. I still had the men's room. Weekends weren't busy, so I wasn't concerned.\n\nSaturday comes around and I use the men's bathroom as a backup. It didn't fit nor ship on Saturday, either. After that, I had to walk to the opposite side of the building and down a floor to use the bathroom until Thursday because they had to call a professional plumber...", "summary": "I took two massive poos and clogged two industrial toilets, eliminating everyone's toilet access on that floor for almost a week."}
{"id": "t3_nor8f", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "After finishing Week 3 Day 3 of C25K I am noticing an unintended benefit of my new lifestyle....(x-post from r/C25K)", "post": "Every day of this week, I have pushed myself to increase my pace while doing the workout. I am running on a treadmill since I already have a gym membership so I can measure exactly how much faster I am going. I went from day 1 at 6.5 miles per hour to Day 2 at 6.7mph and then today all my run intervals were at 7mph. Even though each workout is the same, I found that this keeps it challenging instead of resorting back to the idea that its something I've already achieved.\n\nSo here's the unintended part: I have noticed that with my continued success in losing weight, dieting properly, and keeping to my exercise goals that my confidence in myself is going up. I know that is to be expected but its also effecting my ability to be better in other areas of my life that I never could stick with like my hygiene, my schedule, my budget, keeping in touch with people, etc etc. It's like seeing that when I am determined to do something I can achieve is pushing me to reassess those other things and know that I can improve them too. I get more enjoyment out of striving to be an all around better adult and improving myself now so I have seen much more improvement in all aspects of my life. It's a great feeling as there things have been nagging me for years.", "summary": "By forcing myself to be better about my exercise and diet in order to lose weight, I am noticing I am much more motivated to be better in other, unrelated areas of my life."}
{"id": "t3_1kog0l", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[23/f] I think my [22/f] friend needs therapy, but I'm not sure if it's my place to tell her.", "post": "We will call her Rita. Rita and I have been friends for almost 5 years. During the beginning of our friendship she had told me that she was recovering from depression but it had gotten a lot better. Throughout our friendship there are a few things I have noticed about her. \n\n1.\tShe is extremely insecure, recently she lost a lot of weight and I tried to tell her she looked great, however she couldn't accept the compliment and be proud of what she has accomplished so far. That is just an example but it runs a lot deeper than that.\n\n2.\t I'm not sure if her and her boyfriend want to be together anymore or if they are staying together because they have been together for so long/ fear of being alone (been together since grade nine)\nIn regards to the boyfriend, he has broken up with her 3 or 4 times and she always begs for him to take her back and he always does.\n\nHe just recently purchased a house with his father without consulting her on location or her desires for their home. The house is outside of the city and away from all of the things she values and she has told me that she is very upset about the purchase. (I just found out this information last night)\n\n3.\tI found she has become stagnant in her growth, she never steps outside her comfort zone and doesn't believe in herself.\n\nI haven't talked to her in almost 8 months because she was becoming very frustrating with all of these factors. Always complaining and never feeling good about herself. Well last night she called me to see if I wanted to get some coffee with her. I agreed but I'm not sure If it's my place to bring up that I think she needs professional help, or if recommending it would be a good idea.", "summary": "I think my friend is depressed and needs professional help, is it my place to tell her and if so how to I bring it up?"}
{"id": "t3_1s5ttv", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Charge-off, Paid in full on my credit report; can I get this removed?", "post": "Hi all,\n\nJust under a year ago, I moved states, and brought my credit union account to zero with the intention of closing it. However, before I was able to follow through, Paypal used the bank account to withdraw funds from Christmas shopping. This was maddening because it was my secondary account and not my primary. Anyway, I didn't discover this for months, since my credit union allowed my account to remain overdrafted to the tune of $450, and I wasn't checking that balance anymore. So now it's listed on my credit report and I'm trying to buy a new car, so it would come in very handy if it were removed. Please help!", "summary": "How do I get a $450 charge-off, paid in full, incorrectly detailed item off of my credit report?"}
{"id": "t3_2xgwbu", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by starting an oil fire in my kitchen", "post": "This fuck up happened a couple years ago before I knew of reddit and now I feel compelled to share it. \n\nSo it was new years eve and my husband and I didn't have much food in the house. So I decided to make some homemade potato chips to munch on while we watched a movie. I used a pot and heated up some oil. The chips turned out okay I can never seem to cut them thin enough. I turned off the stove and returned to the couch to watch our movie. \n\nSo the kitchen in my apartment was hiding behind a corner, so there was no way we could have noticed the flames any sooner. \n\nI see a ominous orange glow coming from the kitchen so I casually walk over and turn the corner and...\nOH SHIT! FIRE! FIRE!\n\nI literally panic like an idiot. And thank goodness my husband was there to take care of the situation otherwise I would have surely burnt down the apartment. Turns out I hadn't turned off the burner, but had left it on the highest setting.\n\nSo my husband bolts into the kitchen and grabs the  pot of oil that has ignited. With some quick thinking he grabs a nearby pan and attempts to smother the flames whilst running out of the kitchen towards the door. I open the door and finally in the breezeway of the apartment complex my husband tames the fire.\n\nThere was black soot coated on the vent hood of the stove and my pan was destroyed. I am just glad I didn't start the new year by burning down the apartment.", "summary": "Nearly burned down the apartment on new years eve because I left a pot of oil on the burner and when I thought I turned it off it was actually on the highest setting."}
{"id": "t3_10gqk6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What can i do about an abusive owner?(I work in a restaurant with illegal employees)", "post": "Like any other restaurant there is a lot of crazy shit that goes on semi-regularly. The owner is an italian immigrant, who has little respect for his employees. Last year he got arrested for beating up one of our 17 yo bussers. He will pretty much do anything he can get away with. All of our kitchen and now bussers are illegal immigrants from Honduras and El Salvador. These dudes are the hardest working chillest bros out there. Favorite people in the restaurant by far. I've even learned semi-fluent spanish from them. My biggest deterrent to reporting my boss for an array of abusive actions, is my concern all my buddies will get deported or something. The servers tip out the bussers every night yet the bussers never see this money. When i confronted the manager she informed me it was used to pay their hourly wage. Our carry-out guy gets tips from time to time directly from the customer. I learned today that he has to give those tips to the owner and the credit card tips are just ignored by him. They tried to tell me the same thing when i covered for the carry out guy this morning. I confronted them then, and was told i could talk about it later when the carry out guy wasn't around. I dont know what to do. Can i report the management or owner with out my foreign buddies getting in trouble.", "summary": "I believe i have enough to report my employer for an array of abuses. Can i do this without having some of my illegal immigrent co-workers get the shaft?"}
{"id": "t3_t7vwi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Living with Negativity....26M", "post": "Alright so here is the quick and dirty\nMe - 26 M\nHer - 32 F\nMarried 2 years this July.\nTogether 5 years this October.\n\nWhen we first moved in together I had alot of things that I had to work on as far as being a better husband and communicating with her better, doing my part around the house etc.  Each time it was brought up it devolved into fighting but we figured that this wasn't working so devised a solution, a list!\n\nThis worked, my behaviours changed for the betterment of the relationship and myself and I feel like a better person for it.\n\nNow me, I am a generally positive individual, I try my best to maintain a relatively positive outlook on things and just be humorous.  When it comes to serious stuff I am serious but otherwise I love to smile!\n\nThe issue I am having now is that we have been having ongoing discussions for the past 6 or so months about her attitude which has been getting progressively worse.  She is employed, currently paying down her student loans and stuck with a job that she hates while she does so.  Understandably not the best situation but I am always here for her and to support her, I've helped her get her food blog started, helped her get the implements for her baking etc.  \n\nInstead of a happier more positive wife I have someone who constantly looks at the negatives, refuses to discuss our future together because it is depressing and just in general has issues showing emotion.\n\nWe have discussed this time and again, I'm getting sick of it, she is too and I'm just not seeing much improvement.\n\nI love her, I care for her but for my own mental health I am having difficulty wanting to actually spend time with her when it feels like she just hates life.\n\nKind of a can't see the forest through the trees kind of thing.\n\nI'm open to any suggestions Reddit may have on this.", "summary": "= Wife has a very negative outlook on life when, aside from her job, her life is actually pretty good and I'm trying to get her to see that/change her outlook."}
{"id": "t3_3ya1ij", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting beat up by a girl", "post": "This JUST happened. So I was at a party and I got pretty drunk. Couldn't drive home so I walked to one of my bestriends place that wasnt too far. Ive came unannounced before and spent the night numerous times before, I know where she hides her spare key. So its like 2am and homegirl fell asleep watching tv the couch(where I usually crash when I come over.) So I crash on her bed. Heres where the FU happens. She woke up middle of the night to get water and moved to her bed without noticing me. Both of us are asleep in the same bed and I spooned her. She then freaks out and grabs a lamp and attacks me with it. She got on top of me and threw a few more swings, I was yelling \"STOP STOP STOP\" but she kept on going at me. She then realizes it was me and stops. She patched me up, we had some cocoa, laughed about the whole situation and she went on to fix the bed before going back to sleep. Now here I am buzzed telling the people of reddit how I got beat up by a girl. Happy holidays everyone!", "summary": "Got too drunk to drive home, slept in my friends bed unannounced, spooned her, she freaks out and beats my ass."}
{"id": "t3_4nxxvu", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Our kitty is so picky, we've given in.", "post": "Our rescue cat, Abby, has always been picky with food. When we first got her, she was quite ill and didn't like to eat anyway so that was even more difficult. Every time we think she likes a food, she stops eating it within a week and won't eat it again (Only after we have bought a months supply...).  \n\nThe thing is, we've tried to out-stubborn the cat, and it was a game of chicken we were never going to win.  And then came kitty number two, Ollie, who is just the jabba the hutt of kitties.\n\nNot only will Ollie eat any left over food in Abby's bowl, but Abby doesn't want it and actively gives it to her baby sister.  It got so bad that Abby was vomiting clear bile out of hunger at night... we tried separating them, getting new foods, giving dry food to snack on... it was no use, she didn't eat. Before anyone asks, she HAS been to the vet and they just said she's picky.\n\nFast forward to us getting a gift pack from our vet for the baby when we took Abby in to see if there is a problem. It has royal canin weaning kitty food, and we thought we'd see if Ollie liked it. Guess who likes it? Abby. It is kitty crack cocaine I don't know. We started sprinkling it on top of normal cat food, and guess what.. she eats it. It's like a seasoning.\n\nSo here is our doubt, is this ok to do? The vet seemed really passive about it, and I don't know how good this is to do. I looked up its ingredients and it almost seems just like a vitamin packed dry food. We are sprinkling so she doesn't eat more than a a few grams.", "summary": "our rescue cat won the food battle and now we give her weaning kitten food to get her to eat normally, is this ok?"}
{"id": "t3_3dfeo5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Had a great date with a guy [26M] that I [23F] met online, and then out of the blue he goes completely no contact two days later. Do I reach out for closure?", "post": "I have been texting and snapchatting a guy I met on OKCupid for 2 weeks before we decided to meet and go on our first date. \n\nWhen we met, we clicked. Our sense of humor aligned, we both have the same views on religion and politics, and never ran out of things to talk about over the course of the day. (We went hiking and picnicking, so we were together for about 7 hours on a Saturday.) At the end of the night, there was a perfect first kiss, then some making out later, and talks of a \"next time.\"\n\nWe texted back and forth a little on Sunday, and then Monday I get radio silence. He finally texts me back these one word answers, and then eventually just stops responding. I check on Facebook to see if there's anything going on (as he's a fairly active user and uses Facebook a little like Twitter) only to find out I've been unfriended. \n\nThat was two days ago, and I'm afraid I've been a mess ever since (I know it's silly to get attached that quickly, but we had in depth conversations over the course of two weeks and I've always worn my heart on my sleeve anyway.) I know it's over, I just have no idea why. He gave me no indication that anything was wrong, and if going on that date with me was just acting then he deserves an Oscar. \n\nDo I reach out to him again for closure? I don't want to be the clingy girl that can't take a hint, but I'm kind of heartbroken that I don't at least know WHY.", "summary": "Had a really great date with a guy I met online, then he goes no contact two days later. Do I reach out as to why or just try to process this on my own?"}
{"id": "t3_3uhh8z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [37M] ex-wife [36F] started dating someone that doesn't want her seeing me. To respect his wishes, she has cut off contact and I can't see my stepson [15M] that I've known for nine years.", "post": "My ex-wife and I have known each other for nine years. For those nine years I have also had the wonderful opportunity of building a father/son relationship with my stepson.  My son's mother was/is the best friend I've ever had. Sometimes relationships have their issues so we divorced. We have stayed friends and have been able to be a part of their lives. \n\nAround the end of June and beginning of July she started to date someone seriously.  All I wanted for her was to be happy, which she was. At the end of July she told me she needed to speak with me. We met for lunch and the first words out of her mouth were, \"You're going to hate me.\" At that point she told me her new boyfriend didn't want her seeing me, but that it was her choice. She then told me I wouldn't be able to see my son, who I would see at least once a week to hang out, work on homework, or use the season tickets we had to one of the local sports teams.  Afterwards, she told me she would re-evaluate the situation in four months and that I would be able to see my stepson one more time to speak with him (under the supervision of his aunt). After the meeting she blocked me on all social media and had my son do the same.\n\nI was devastated because I had lost two of my best friends. \nThe last 16 weeks have been some of the most difficult I've ever faced. I contacted my son's aunt and she told me her sister hadn't told her anything about the agreement of seeing my son and that she didn't want to get involved. I'm fine with that, I don't want to cause any rifts with her family. \n\nThis Monday will be the end of four months. I have some ideas on how I should approach the situation but I would like anyone's opinion on how to proceed.", "summary": "Ex-wife's new boyfriend doesn't want her to see me, because of this I am unable to see my stepson."}
{"id": "t3_3el3z6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22f] girlfriend pays her little sisters 100$ phone bill every month when we can barely pay our own bills. She refuses to bring it up to her parents.", "post": "I'm 22m and my girlfriend 22f have an apartment together. We have a rent, phone bills etc. Both of us work full time to pay our bills. The problem is my girlfriend has been paying her little sisters bill as well as her own and we never have any extra money. We can't go to a dinner or movie at the end of the month because we have bills and food. Her parents are not the best off but they make at least 5 times as much as we do. They have pot (which I have no problem with ) and do other recreational activities. Her little sister is 13. \n\nI understand a cellphone is necessary with buses and stuff but why is my gf fronting the bill. She refused to bring it up to either of them and I've talked to other people in her family and their on my side.  I keep telling her to please bring it up to them. I didn't mind before we had all these bills but now that we're trying to start a life every penny counts.  I don't want to bring it up to her parents because I'm not exactly in the position too but this is effecting our bills. Not to mention I want her to be on my significantly cheaper service provider. \n\nHer mom also does little things like say she's coming over then shows up her, her boyfriend, his son and his sons friend. We have a tiny one bedroom and this ruined my night because I couldn't even sit on my couch and relax after work. She's also told her little sister Her and her friends could stay at our house while they attended a con which we could not house or feed. (They didn't enzd up staying but it's the principal) My girlfriends sister is family but I don't think it's her/our responsibility to care for her. The main issue though is the phone bill. What should I do guys?", "summary": "my girlfriend is paying 100$ a month for her little sisters phone bill even though her parents can afford to pay it and we cannot. "}
{"id": "t3_293vfs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my Roommate [24 M] 5 months, We agreed to a certain amount for rent. I ask for rent early and he says \"i'm not an atm\". Need some advice.", "post": "A little bit of back story. I am in a situation where I do not have to pay rent or utilities for my house.\n\n I decided to let my friend move in with me as long as he pays 150 dollars a month to me for rent. Today I just asked him if I could get the money early because I need gas and to get some other stuff. He basically told me that I use him as an atm. I don't understand this. We agree'd to a certain amount. I told him that I hope he didn't see it that way, because I don't see him that way at all. He has lended me 15 bucks for a leash for my dog a while back and I told him he could take it off of rent, but that's the only time I have asked for any sort of early rent from him or any sort of money beyond the agree'd 150. What's the deal and what can I say? I'm kind of upset about it and it felt like an accusation of sorts.", "summary": "Roommate says \"I'm not an atm\" when I ask him for rent money early. I don't know what to say."}
{"id": "t3_2tottt", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Get paid in cash/silver+gold bullion, not sure how to file taxes.", "post": "So I'll be filing my won taxes for the first time, and I'm a little confused because of the way I make money. I work online and get paid with either btc or paypal. When I get paid with bitcoin, I sell in on localbitcoins for either cash or gold/silver bullion. I've had some issues with paypal before, and because of this I don't add all my personal/banking info. Each week I use the money on paypal to purchase around $3500 of gold/silver bullion from ebay. All of which I keep in a safe. I have money in my checking/savings account that I use for bills/expenses, so all the money I have made this year is in gold/silver. I know this seems really silly or might be a stupid thing to do with my money, but collecting gold and silver is a hobby of mine and I've just been stocking up. \nI started keeping detailed track of the exact dollar amount I was making about 4 months ago, but earlier than that I was stupid and didn't write anything down so I don't know the exact amount of money I made. \nIs there something I should do if I don't know how much I have made, and don't have a W2 or any tax info? Do I mark down that I'm self employed?\nI know this seems really confusing, so I understand if your advice is just \"hire a tax professional\"", "summary": "All the money I have made in the past year is in gold/silver bullion. Not sure how much. No employer, no W2, no records. Anything I need to know when filing this year?"}
{"id": "t3_2rgy2n", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I am a fucking dumbass who can't read numbers", "post": "I mixed up two of the digits when I sent the text message.\n\nI am in a student organization that helps build primary and secondary schools in rural areas in Honduras. I went on a week long service trip last winter and it was the most amazing week of my life. I can't describe why, but being in this organization and working towards my fundraising goal has been just about the most important and fulfilling thing in my life over the last year or so.\n\nI was supposed to head back to Honduras in 5 days. For now I am home from college over winter break. I noticed last week that I made the colossal mistake of leaving my passport at my college apartment (~5 hrs away). Thankfully, I had a roommate still there who could mail it to me. With over 10 business days before leaving on my trip at the time, I figured mailing it was not much of a risk (I realize now how stupid this reasoning is).\n\nOf course, today, I checked back over my text conversation with my roommate and noticed I got the fucking address wrong. 2 numbers swapped places. I don't know if I read it wrong or typed it in wrong. The address I sent does not exist. I am a fucking aerospace engineering student but I can't fucking read a fucking 5 digit number apparently. \n\nI am lost for options at this point. It will be near impossible to track it down (it's in an envelope, no tracking #). It will most certainly be returned to my college apartment too late to get in time for my flight.\n\nI realize that this only happened because of a special series of idiotic errors that only I am capable of. I have wasted a years worth of fundraising, over a thousand dollars worth. I spent so many mornings at bake sales and sponsored events. I worked so hard and now I will spend the week at home feeling sorry for myself. I want to crawl under a rock and die.", "summary": "I made the stupidest, simplest mistake and now after a year of hard work I will miss out on one of the most incredible weeks of my life"}
{"id": "t3_553n6i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [21F] break up with my BF [21M] of two years? First relationship.", "post": "It's over. \n\nIt hurts to admit it, but it's true. We fell in love fast and hard, and were completely absorbed in our relationship for a while. And slowly it's just been fading. I love him, but I'm not in love. \n\nThere's no romance. He always gets upset at me for things that shouldn't be an issue at all (like wanting to go out and have a girls night). He spends his days sleeping and playing video games, he has no interest in working or working out or taking care of himself (or me). I feel like I'm scared to do anything because he always finds reasons to yell at me. I'm just not happy. He has told me multiple times that he doesn't trust me, and to a point I think he is very controlling (or tries to be). \n\nIt's hard. We live together, and have spent 99% of our time together for the last two years. I love him, and he loves me, but I just can't do this anymore. I need to experience being single and doing my own thing and having freedom. Maybe I am making a mistake and maybe I will regret letting go of someone who loves me, but the fact that I can't get these thoughts of breaking up out of my head is a big sign. \n\nWhat do I say? I don't want to hurt him. I've been putting this off because I don't want to have to go through the stress of one of us moving out or explaining to his parents (who treat me like a daughter). How do I even bring it up? I have never done this before and I don't know how. \n\nAlso- my biggest fear- will I regret it? \n\nThank you for any advice or comforting words.", "summary": "I want to break up with my first BF, together 2 years... I just don't know what to say or when to say it."}
{"id": "t3_18pk9p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (24) have found out my bf's (25) mother abandoned their family. How do I be supportive?", "post": "I am in a new relationship (4 months) and discovered through my boyfriend's friend that his mother abandoned their family when he was very young. One of his friends let this slip to me after a few drinks at a party. My boyfriend has not told me yet.\n\nPreviously I knew there has been no contact with his mom and the subject is very touchy. I haven't pushed him to reveal anything. We had spoken about our pasts before, he was upset but said in time he will be able to tell me things and I am ok waiting for him to share. \n\nHe's also been hurt in former relationships and I think this has really affected him being open with me as he avoids in-depth or emotional conversations.\n\nI come from a family where my parents are still together and have no idea how to approach this or help him feel more at ease with me. I care about him very much and want to make this work. Any help is appreciated.", "summary": "Boyfriend's mother abandoned family when he was young, he hasn't told me this but I found out through a friend. How can I be supportive of him?"}
{"id": "t3_3fus5q", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I need some advice about a few things", "post": "The whole starting point of everything happened when my dad walked out on my mum after cheating. It's been an extremely messy and complicated divorce that is still not settled 4 years later. My dad has depression and has some perceived victim complex when talking about the divorce to people - to some he will lie and act as if they are still together (he didn't even tell his own family, they found out by trying to contact him through us). To others he says how my mum is the one who cheated - but HE is the one who cheated. He has also been keeping secrets and lying for many years before he left. He has lied constantly throughout the court process and won't agree to settle anything because he wants to destroy my mum - even the mediator says his behaviour is absolutely fucked and can't understand why he won't just settle things. That is only some of it - but I don't speak to him at all anymore. He hasn't supported me one bit throughout this entire process or even tried to.\n\nA knock on effect is that now my mum and sibling have depression as well. All 3 of my immediate family have depression and I do not.  It is very difficult to live with her sometimes and I don't know what to do.\n\nDue to all of this my mum is now trying to support me and the pets we have (sibling moved out of home)singlehandedly but money is extremely  tight all of the time. Due to me being over 18, my dad is not legally required to help me at all... It creates a lot of stress and I did have a job but lost it due to no hours for me. Now I have zero income. I am trying to get through uni - 4/5 days a week 1h30mins away, and do 5:30 starts most mornings leaving me somewhat sleep deprived. Moving is out of the question due to combined home circumstances, but the fuel cost is really difficult. I have only got the work experience of the job I just lost - 3 months weekend casual worker.", "summary": "how do i handle living with a family member with depression + is there anything an unexperienced student can do to try to get some extra money so I can afford to get to  uni?"}
{"id": "t3_36q1yk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15 F] with my ex-bf [15 M] 2 months, having trouble letting go after getting dumped", "post": "Basically I was dating another guy (John) for a year- not bad for a first relationship- but he broke up with me in a pretty harsh way (just dumped me out of the blue on the first day back to school. I was a wreck for months). Then my new ex (Mike) comes along, and kinda lifts me back out from my depression-esque mentality. So we're both attracted to each other, but I was scared to date Mike because I didn't think I could go through anotehr breakup. But after a while, I finally relented cuz I couldn't bear to see him with other people, and he kinda said, \"If we break up, I'll make you hate me or something so it'll hurt less.\" Either way, we got together, but I was a bit clingy and needed a lot of his time, so he said he couldn't deal with it. Broke up with me gently, and said we could stay friends (we were pretty good friends in that period where he was helping me get over John). Now I want to be friends again, but I feel like I'm trying too hard. Also I still like him, and it's only been... about exactly a week. I've actually just started no contact for about 3 hours (shoulda done it right away I know, but it was hard), but I already feel like shit. \n\nAny advice? I need to let go and stop making a fool out of myself, especially because we have so many classes together. I can't keep my eyes off him and everyone says it's creepy. Help!", "summary": "He broke up with me, said we could remain friends, but I still like him and I'm making a fool out of myself by hanging around all the time. Tips for staying away (and hurting less)?"}
{"id": "t3_2bv9qb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I know my girlfriend [18/F] of 9 months cares, but she just doesn't put in any effort and I [20/M] am sick of it...worth breaking up over?", "post": "Been seeing this girl since November, she is so much fun, absolutely gorgeous and very well-intentioned...but I think she's just fucking lazy. I'll ask her out and get turned down because her parents won't let her, she has work, she has uni or she's with other friends, to the point where I've stopped trying.\n\nPart of the issue is me, because I'm too spiteful and refuse to be the one always asking. I asked two friends out to lunch today and just didn't bother asking my own girlfriend, simply because there was like an 80% chance she'd say no for whatever reason and I'd get pissed off.\n\nI tried to break up with her a few months ago for the same reason, really, and I've had words with her about it since too. I know she cares, I know that I mean a lot to her and she doesn't want to lose me...but she just doesn't show it at all [when she's not with me]. When we're together everything is really good, great even. We have heaps of fun and clearly love each other's company. But once we part ways, it might be for the whole week despite us living like a 20 minute drive away, and 90% of the time we'll only see each other if I keep asking.\n\nI've had this issue for a while but have told myself I'll wait until the end of August since by then we'll have had a few weeks with her parents out of the picture to see if the relationship actually changes, but I don't know if I can even hang in that much longer. I asked her to come over on Thursday since I hadn't seen her for a week and had been away - she was going to be at work that night and my place is closer than hers from there - but no, she was \"too tired\" to stay with me.\n\nSince I've brought it up before and nothing's really changed, should I even go through the same speech again? I want to love this girl but I just spend so much of my time being pissed off.", "summary": "girlfriend puts no effort into seeing me, tried to break up with her previously but she said it would change, it hasn't. Do I just end it?"}
{"id": "t3_47x3z3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27F] am upset with something the man I'm dating [30M] texted. Am I overreacting?", "post": "I [27F] have been seeing a new guy, John [30M] for a month and a half. We see each other once a week, often on weekends, and text each other every day after work, usually telling the other one what our day has been like. He is the one initiating the conversation most of the time; not sure if it's relevant, but just saying in case it is. We didn't have the exclusivity talk yet.\n\nYesterday he initiated the conversation again and started telling me about this woman at work who wanted to set him him up with someone. I asked him if she showed him pictures of the woman in question. He replied: \"Yes, she looks terrible. **I lied** and said I just started seeing someone.\"\n\nI am very upset because of the \"I lied\" part of the sentence but didn't tell him anything about it yet. He didn't seem to be joking at all.\n\nAlso, I think it's worth mentioning that our first date was outside and awesome and lasted six hours but that the dates after were mostly dinner at his place.\n\nDo you believe he is seeing me as a fuck buddy and thinks I'm cool with it, or is there any chance that he is testing the waters to see how I am going to be reacting to his behavior?", "summary": "New guy I'm dating is either being a tactless idiot or a douche, but somehow I want to figure that out."}
{"id": "t3_40nsi8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19F) just got stood up by the guy (19M) I've been seeing for 5 weeks.", "post": "So I just got stood up. \n\nHere's the deal. I've been seeing this guy for about 5 weeks now and we've really been hitting it off. So far everything has been really good, no problems, and we planned last night to meet up for lunch during my 12-1 break today. We texted and had unrelated conversation this morning, then at 12 I left class to go meet him. \n\nBy 12:15 he's a no-show, so I text to make sure everything is ok. \n\nBy 12:30 I'm pretty pissed off, and a friend passes by so I accompany him to lunch and text the guy id been planning to meet that I had to leave to get food since I had class at 1.  He responds about 10 minutes later with something along the lines of \"sorry, I'm awful, I got caught up in schoolwork and lost track of time\". I haven't said anything yet. \n\nI'm pretty angry, and those who know me in person know that I never get angry about anything. I don't know what to do. I really liked him and things had been going really well. If it wasn't for that I would have no trouble just not responding and never seeing him again, but I do really like him. What do I do/say?", "summary": "got stood up by guy who I'd been seeing for several weeks and had we had really been hitting it off. Don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_50m4jz", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being weirdly obsessed with coin orientation", "post": "I was about 10 and my friend and I saw a cool infomercial (no idea now what they were selling) where a guy flattened a penny with a hammer. (If you think you know where this is going, you are absolutely right.) For some reason, we thought it would be a great idea to try that, only we couldn't find a penny, so we decided to try to flatten a dime. Shockingly, dimes and pennies are made of different materials, so we weren't making much progress, but like good little elementary school kids, we were taking turns swinging the hammer on the sidewalk by my house. When it was my friend's turn, I noticed Roosevelt's face was angled about 40 degrees away from her, and for some reason it seemed really crucial that he be facing her dead on, so I rotated the dime. I was a neurotic, whiny kid, so when my mom heard me crying, she assumed it was something minor and came out rolling her eyes before she saw all the blood. Luckily, I didn't break any bones, but I had a cool hangnail with which to gross out all the boys on the bus for the next few weeks.", "summary": "Tried to smash a dime with a hammer; stupidly got in the way of the hammer; got my pinky smashed in."}
{"id": "t3_cwgoi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear reddit: Cute girl at the bank I want to ask out.", "post": "The bank I go to has the cutest teller working inside during the afternoons, and I try to make up reasons to go just to see her. The problem is that when three tellers, or whatever, are working, no guarantee I'll get her window. I can't really just tell the person behind me, 'No no, you go ahead, I'm waiting for the cute one.' Anyway, We've talked a few times and flirted mildly. I was super-thrilled to see that she had a copy of an R.A Salvatore book - the fourth in the Drizzt series. So she's really pretty AND into geeky fantasy? I'm there!\n\nSo the question is, well two really, How to I find enough excuses to keep going back till I get her window? No guarantee she'll even be working that day anyway. And secondly, I feel kind of creepy hitting on a woman who's working. Like, she can't get away or whatever.", "summary": "how do I ask out the cute girl who works at my bank when I might not be the next person in line to get her window?"}
{"id": "t3_193ycd", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Why aren't men interested in me? [f/20]", "post": "Now, I don't really even know where to begin with this. I'm a 20 year old woman and I believe i'm a great person, but I just can figure out why men aren't interested in me unless they're just trying to hook up. I've had my fair share of hook ups, but never with someone i've just randomly met and i've continued to have good friendships with these men without having any desire to make a relationship out of it.\n\nI am a full time student trying to get my degree, even doing that I have plenty of time to myself for other activities. I also am a mother. Sure I had my child young, but it's the one thing that changed my life for the better. I was not in school pre child and now my life has come together more than I ever could have hoped for. My child's father and I have a great friendship, and that's all it is. We co-parent very well together. Thus also leading me to have lots of time for myself as our time with our child is split 50/50.\n\nI'd like to think that i'm a great person with a great personality. I enjoy pretty much anything and would be willing to experience new things. I've also always been told that i'm a very attractive woman. Now what am I missing here? I definitely don't need a man to make me happy, as I already am. I just know that i'd love to have that person who makes my life a little brighter.\n\nSome of the men that i've been involved with recently (but not too recently) or interested in always seem to find a way out and I can't help but think it's either something to do with the fact that I already have a child or it's just something about me. I have my entire life in order. I live in my own home, no debt, I attend college and am very close to getting my degree. If  I can tell you one thing from that is that I have my life in FAR better order than most people my age and in my situation. Much better than most of my friends too.\n\nSo, any advice would help. I'm not really sure what i'm looking for, but it's something.", "summary": "Have my life in order, mother, on track to get my college degree, what am I doing wrong in my life that men aren't interested?"}
{"id": "t3_120wzc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What's the best way to get over being jealous of GF's Gay best friend?", "post": "22M, Girlfriend is 21F. We've been together for a year and a half. Her best friend is gay. At first I was uncomfortable with him since I don't know that many gay people, but the more I hung out with him (only a few times) the more comfortable I've been with him. We have complete trust in each other. Girlfriend actually went out with him when they were in high school together, then he cheated on her and then that's when he came out of the closet. They've remained best friends and like to go to gay clubs together. I feel this problem would be less of an issue if I went with them, but I work really late 5 days a week, (til 3am on weekends).\n\nMy only problem with him is how much he likes to drink which I feel like has an influence on her. I've brought that up to her but she says she will only keep drinking when she wants to. When she would instagram pictures of them together hanging at the club or wherever it made me feel uneasy. I felt it was unhealthy to feel that way and getting addicted to seeing what she would post so I stopped going on instagram completely. \n\nThe reason why I get jealous is because I feel like she has more fun when it's just him and her vs me and her since he makes her laugh so much. Does anyone have any advice for learning to accept the idea that it's okay that maybe she does have fun with him more, since he is her best friend and all.. \n\nRe-reading what I wrote here, makes me feel like this whole thing is silly, but I still would like to hear what others have to say. Thanks.", "summary": "22M worried that 21F gf has more fun with gay best friend and not sure how to get over that."}
{"id": "t3_fmwzk", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Fresh out of college and can't seem to land a programming job", "post": "I graduated in Dec. 2010, and since then have been unable to get a programming job in my area.  Since my area is the state of Mississippi I decided to look elsewhere.  New Orleans is close by but all my attempts have given me nothing.  I have a friend in San Francisco and have started looking for work there, but so far nothing.  I haven't applied to many places in SF though because I'm unsure of the quality of many of the places.\n\nI'm worried that no REAL work experience is hurting me.  Only experience I've got under my belt is fixing computers and setting up networks for local businesses.  I did that for money since high school.  I've placed in two competitions for innovative design for two projects at school -- one of which won first place ($3500).  Other than these things I don't really have much else.\n\nIf anyone has any pointers or knows of some places to submit a resume to I'm ALL EARS.  I'm currently working a minimum wage job helping out a friend, and am getting tired of looking like the town idiot who has a degree but no job.", "summary": "Graduated Dec. 2010 (Computer Science), can't find a tech job in MS, New Orleans, or San Francisco. Looking for tips/places to apply."}
{"id": "t3_41l782", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [35F] with my husband [40 M] of three years, weirded out by friendship with co-worker", "post": "This is my second marriage, his first.  We have two kids.  For a couple of years, I've gotten a bad vibe from one of his female co-workers.  They are good friends, and get along really well.  They're both musicians.  He really likes her and wants to be able to hang out with her after work, like grabbing a beer with her.  I know he texts her sometimes outside of work hours but not sure how often or what about (he's pretty secretive with his phone).  It makes me super uncomfortable and he knows this. \n\n We had a pretty big blowout a few months ago when she was throwing a party and I asked him not to go.  He thinks I'm totally irrational about her and gets angry whenever I try to talk to him about this.  He was going to go to the party regardless of how I felt about it so we ended up going together and it was fine.  \n\nI have tried to just drop it since the party.  I feel like he knows how I feel and that's all I can really do.  He hasn't been going for drinks with her or anything, which I appreciate.   I have recently found out, though, that this woman has a reputation for being a \"home wrecker.\"  My husband said it's because she went one a date with her married friend while he was separated from his wife.  This is making me feel even more uneasy about her and my husband's friendship.  I know rumor mills can get carried away, especially in a small town.  But I can't help but feel a little justified in wanting them to not be friends now that I know this.\n\nMore relevant information.... My first marriage ended because he met someone else.  So it's entirely possible I'm over reacting about this situation because of that.  I've been in therapy for over three years and feel like I've made great strides.  My husband occasionally goes to therapy with me but it hasn't been very helpful.  He gets impatient taking about the same thing over and over (his words).", "summary": "Husband's relationship with female co-workers is bothering me.  He thinks I'm irrational.  I'm not sure.  Where is the line between an innocent friendship and something more?"}
{"id": "t3_2fj2mz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] have been dating a girl [19 F] for about two weeks; her crazy ex has been threatening the both of us.", "post": "I met a girl on Tinder for a casual hookup. There ended up being good chemistry between the two of us and we transitioned into dating. We've had five dates so far and everything has been quite well except for her abusive ex of 8 months getting involved. She had broken up with him about 4 months ago and I was her first venture back into the dating scene. As soon as word got to him about the two of us, he began calling her phone and leaving very threatening voice-mails and demanding answers to some very private questions.\n\nShortly after that ordeal he got a hold of my number. The two times we've spoken he told me in a very threatening manner that he happens to have friends in various biker gangs and doesn't appreciate me seeing her. He then gave me an ultimatum to either stop seeing her OR to not set foot into \"his city\". I've only talked to him for 30 minutes or so; but I've come to the conclusion that he isn't the most mentally stable individual.\n\nI'm not a fan of getting involved in situations like this; I tend to avoid conflicts because my time and effort is better spent doing more productive things. And because of my lack of experience dealing with threats and unstable individuals, I'm reaching out to you /r/relationships. She has told me that he has never followed through with any of his threats over the past few months of being broken up, but I feel as if him seeing her with a significant other might be enough to give him initiative to actually do something.\n\nSo, what would my best course of action be? I really do like this girl, and have a date in the city planned with her on Sunday. But on the other side of things I'd rather not put myself in a situation where I may be at risk.", "summary": "Crazy ex of the girl I am seeing demands things and threatens action towards her and myself. What should I do?  Do I have enough to justify a restraining order?"}
{"id": "t3_f0ja1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I caught her with another guy by using the Find My iPhone website. Not sure if ill ever trust her again.", "post": "30 year old male here about to break up with the girl I saw myself marrying.\nSo I have had issues trusting my gf, we have been together for 2.5 years now. in march of 2010 I caught her coming home (we have lived in my place together for entire relationship) and she was out drinking with an ex boyfriend. I sucked it up and accepted her apology and have been dealing with it ever since. This is about the time I registered her phone with the Find My Iphone service.\nFast forward to Monday night- I get texts form her saying she was going out to pick us up some food. I come home from work late around 7pm and she is not home. she wont answer my calls or texts. I know where she is cause I pulled up Find My Iphone website and she is at the local bar down the street. I wait for 3 hours and finally get a text of her saying she was at her girlfriends house and she will be home soon. LIAR! I had enough and stormed off to confront her at the bar. Didn't see the car she was driving in the parking lot so I'm starting to think im wrong, But there it is parked IN THE BACK. as if to hide from me.\nI found her and a guy she works with (restaurant, typical for sleeping with coworkers).\nNow we are a mess and Im about to throw her out and start my life over, Sucks cause I wanted to marry this one.\nShe doesn't know I tracked her with the iPhone. And I don't think Ill ever trust her again. Is it still cheating even though I didn't catch them having sex? In my eyes she lied to be with another guy while i was at work and that's cheating in my book.\nAny advice is appreciated.\nAlso this is my first ever post to reddit and im using a throwaway account.", "summary": "My GF was fooling around with her ex 10 months ago and I installed Find My Iphone on her cell. Used it to track her and catch her cheating on me again."}
{"id": "t3_nsea0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Finally got a date with a crush of 7 years, but it comes with a catch.", "post": "So me of 21 finally got a confirmation that the girl(21), will allow me to take her on a \"date\".  That made me extremely happy was finally able to \"grow the balls\" and ask. Which in return she said yes. Things are going great so far as a long distance relationship.\n\nThere are two major problems though. The first is that I'm currently in Germany on a tour for another 4 months. So the next time I'll be able to see her and actually take her on the date will be when I come home for PCS leave(In the army). We talk every day Via Phone and Skype etc, which is nice even though I've known her for 7 years this is really the first time I have been able to see her personality for what it is, and it is amazing. She really is Liking the LDR, because she says the last couple of boy friends she has been with sex has been really involved and obscured what she has really wanted. She says she brags about me all the time about how I'm Sweet and charming and thing of the like. What are your problems, success stories to help motivate me in that way. \n\nThe second thing is as much as I like her, she has HSV-1. With the amount of research I've done on this topic I'm skeptical about it. I am clean. I just don't know what to do. I like her...way to much for my own good, just to drop it off because of cold sores down below. As i mentioned above do you guys have any success stories, problems with a situation like this? I would really like some advice and other out looks then the obvious one of dude shes got the herp, just leave it, don't ever touch it.", "summary": "I like a girl of the same age, but it's going to be a LDR for 4 months, and she has Herpes Strain 1."}
{"id": "t3_3lefau", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(22/M) Just recently out of a relationship with a (22/F), looking for a silver lining if it exists. Please help", "post": "I dated a girl (22) for a year and a half. We split in summer because I moved to Florida for summer. She got a job in Panama city, right when I came home from Florida. \n\nI'll spare the details but she met up with a boy who she met after knowing on the Internet for 6 years. He lived 3.5 hours away from her. The day they met in real life he asked her out. She said yes. \n\nFast forward 1 month... he moved in with her and they say I love you to eachother and I only found this out after creeping on her tumblr. Big mistake. But she'll text me every fucking week trying to be friendly I want nothing to do with her. But I still love her and haven't moved on. I was hoping she would eventually come back up to philly and we would work on things. Because I thought her behavior was extreme and just a front and irrational.\n\n How could a relationship with a stranger from the Internet work when he lives 3.5 hours away? Well after two or three weeks they live together and say I love you to eachother. Now I'm really depressed and feel like shit. Can anyone help, or try and explain what's going on?", "summary": "basically a girl I dated for a year and a half moved to Florida, got like 3 more piercings dates a stranger from the Internet they live together and say I love you after a month"}
{"id": "t3_17saa3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[F29] Is there something in between casual sex and LTR?", "post": "Three years ago I ended a 6 yr relationship, and it left me with a lot of trust issues. A few months after the split, my ex felt he needed to \"clear the air\" so that we could have a chance at reconciling. That involved my learning I had been completely oblivious to cheating, lying, and an arrest (yup, he went to jail for a few days and I had no idea). I know what you're thinking, that I am just super dumb. I wish that was the case, I'm college educated and have a professional career, just plain old gullible. In the aftermath, I have spent a year having exclusive relationships, the next having one night stands, and the last online dating. For the record online dating does nothing to improve trust issues, I had on guy tell me he slept with Cameron Diaz and another try to steal a set of golf clubs (and those are just the gems). \n\nThis afternoon the guy I have been seeing on and off for the last six months finally agreed to keep things casual. Now, I am free to date and see whomever I choose, and am contemplating whether I want to go the online route again. My casual relationships thus far have involved ignoring lies because the details aren't important. This isn't one sided, I fib about where I am when I'm out with other guys. Unfortunately, when I notice them my history and fear makes ignoring feel self-deprecating, and I struggle to forgive myself for ages after the bad ones.  On the other hand, I am just not ready for the LTR I want, one missed text or phone call and I flip, but I'm not attracted to someone who caters to my every wish in the long term. So Reddit, I need suggestions on what to do next. \n\n- Side Note \u2013 During this last relationship I was in a place to tell my SO about how scared of lies I am and it got a lot better, so I know that in time it will get easier.", "summary": "Super gullible w/ trust issues, not ready for LTR but casual involves too many lies, what direction should be next?"}
{"id": "t3_yi3jj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What alarming/unusual thing has happened to you to make you rethink certain travel destinations?", "post": "A couple months ago I went to Miami with a female friend of mine. Little did I know I would encounter creeps everywhere - literally men waiting on the side of the road to approach us at night. On the second day there, we were walking to the parking lot to add more time for the space. It was about 6PM and there was a lot of foot/road traffic in the area. I can't remember if I was looking down at my phone or not, but my friend was walking a few feet ahead of me. Suddenly, a couple of guys pass me pretty close and I hear an aerosol spray and smell nothing but ether/paint thinner (no idea). Almost instantly I feel nauseous and have a strong head-to-toe light headed feeling, like I'm passing out. When I caught my breath I turned around and saw the two guys lingering by a parking meter watching me, then they walked away. My friend didn't see/hear anything happen, and I didn't tell anybody else walking around. I instantly felt freaked out and didn't feel right for the next hour. Needless to say, I left that night. I felt like I was in Taken 2 and there was no Liam Neeson to save my ass. I'll probably never go back to seedy Miami.", "summary": "went to Miami and got sprayed in the face with ether(?) by a stranger, almost passed out before adrenaline kicked in. Never found out what happened."}
{"id": "t3_32932f", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Why would anyone want to call themselves a gamer? (Rant)", "post": "I play video games; I have since I was a kid starting with Pokemon red. I still play them everyday, yet I refuse to call myself a gamer.\n\nThe way I see it, gaming has become more popular than ever. There are more people playing then ever before and subsequently more self-proclaimed gamers. However, since it has become so main stream, I don't see how it's much different than saying \"I'm a TV watcher\" or \"music listener.\" Now if you said you only played tabletop or something, that'd be different.\n\nThe truth is that it isn't about being hardcore or even playing games. It's about wanting to be in a nerdy subculture that pretends it's niche when that couldn't be farther from the truth. Playing games is as mainstream as it gets.\n\nNo, it's about the culture that I think is frankly ridiculous. It's a bunch of nostalgia circlejerks and pseudo inside jokes for things that are actually quite popular (took an arrow to the knee, etc.) It doesn't matter if the latest call of duty (for example) is good or not, what matters is whether it's popular with \"gamers.\"\n\n\"CoD is the same every time but the new Pokemon is pretty swell.\" \n\nThis hypocrisy and favoritism makes my blood boil. I've never played call of duty because it's not my cup of tea, not because \"that's what casuals play.\" The whole PC master race also irritates me. Who really gives a shit what someones console preference is?\n\nI can't even finish my rant. It frustrates me that I ever called myself a gamer as a kid anyway. It's just so dumb.", "summary": "it's about overused memes, politics, and inside jokes, not the act of gaming itself. It's not niche anymore so stop acting like you're part of some cool subculture. What's the point, anyway?"}
{"id": "t3_3rjkon", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] am in love for the first time and it hurts.", "post": "Hello, \n\nI'm a 16y/o male and im in love with a girl [16]. This is the first time i'm in love and it is really exchausting. I am 100% sure i am not ready for a relation yet and i don't want it either. I almost never talk with her so our relationship is non existing. Another thing is that someone else also likes her and it keeps getting in my head because they regularly chill with each other. I am at a point were i am so in love that i can't  focus on school anymore. I never had this feeling before and its a first time for me. The feeling i get is really exchausting. My heart rate goes up really high and i get a weird feeling in my stomach.\n\nI started to like her about 5 months ago and i am really in love since 1 week ago. I don't know what to do and i don't think this will go away soon.\n\n(Sorry for the really bad english grammar i'm not native.)", "summary": "im really in love with a girl but i just cant live with this fact. I don't know what to do!"}
{"id": "t3_3f2a3i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "M25 needs help asking F23 out on a date. But it's more complicated than that.", "post": "Hello! I'[M] 25 and single. I was wondering if you guys could please help me out with some advice on asking a girl out. I met this [F23], Elizabeth (pseudonym), last year at university while she and I were in a one year program together - we never met prior to this. We spent the better part of a year in close proximity, having mutual friends and hanging out. From the moment I saw her I was attracted - she was smart and pretty. Unfortunately, I could never get myself to ask her out. A part of me kept saying she's not interested because I never talked to her everyday, just whenever there was the occasional get together with mutual friends would there be some small talk. With the program over since last December 2014, I have never been able to get her off my mind. I have her on Facebook and I have her cell phone number, but I've never messaged her. I really want to ask her out, but I don't know what to do. Also, she lives in a different city than I do (~45 mins away). What should I do? Your help is greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Was in a one year program with a girl I met last year. I want to ask her girl out, but I've never really talked to her outside of occasional hang outs (none happening any more). What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_1o4cpd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I wrong in my convictions about jealousy?", "post": "24,M / 23,F\n\nIn two of my previous relationships, I was the jealous type and have greatly learned my lesson from being that way. I am currently in a 2 year relationship in which my girlfriend and I live together. I love her, but because of things I've experienced, I am no longer the jealous type. I won't let myself behave like that again. She gets upset with me because I don't get jealous. Don't get me wrong, if a guy were to touch her I'd knock him out. But she tells me that it makes her feel like I don't take pride in her or value her because I don't get jealous that another guy might think she's attractive or something. Am I downplaying jealousy too much? I don't feel that there is anything healthy about jealousy in a relationship, but it seems she does.", "summary": "Girlfriend thinks I should display jealousy. Due to past experiences with it, I don't display petty jealousy and feel it's nothing but harmful in a relationship."}
{"id": "t3_2ekrc0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[26 M] My girlfriend is coming over to break up with me in 2 hours please help me find the words to make her change her mind.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for 5 years. She is my best friend, and she is about to leave me. She went on a trip out of town for 12 days and barely called me. When she got home she was distant, hanging out with friends avoiding me. I grew angry and confronted her. I've always felt like I was second string to her friends, but I don't care about any of that now. I just want her to not leave a relationship we both loved and cherished for 5 years over a cold fight that lasted a little over 6 days. I've loved her since the moment I saw her, I just want her to give this more time.", "summary": "I can't lose my best friend in the world. How can I make her not throw a 5 year relationship over a fight that I am willing to concede?"}
{"id": "t3_3bpvyg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girl [25 F] with Male [28 M] can you go back to the getting to know phase once you have had sex?", "post": "I wanted the internets opinion because my co-worker and I argued at length about this and got nowhere. \n\nSo guy meets girl and they exchange numbers, talk and flirt all that jazz. They keep trying to organise a date but both are really busy. She suddenly decides to comes cover to guys house late one night, stays the night because he lives close to her work. They have sex.  \n\nNow my question is can they go back to being a cute and trying to arrange a date and get to know each other or is she now a fuck buddy?\n\nMy view is she is now a fuck buddy. My co-worker says if he is really keen on her he will still take her out on a date because now he knows he will definitely get some.  I think he is just saying that just because.", "summary": "Once 2 people have sex, can you go back to the getting to know each other phase and still go on a date and meet up for coffee....stuff like that. Is it possible to \"start\" agian? "}
{"id": "t3_kxxio", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Do American kids have a \"dinosaur phase\"?", "post": "I'm from New Zealand. It's pretty much a secular country, ie politicians speaking about God is a big no-no. A lot of people are Christian but for the most part they are not fundamentalists, and most of them believe in evolution. Evolution is taught in science class in high school.\n\nAs a kid in New Zealand, pretty much every boy (and probably some girls) go through a \"dinosaur phase\", where they are really into dinosaurs. Their parents buy them dinosaur toys and book and computer games. The primary appeal is obviously the fact that dinosaurs are awesome giant scary monsters, but they also end up learning about the Cretaceous period and the Jurassic period and how many millions of years ago the dinosaurs lived.\n\nSo I read that [almost half of the American population doesn't believe in evolution] Coming from a scientific background, this just seems absolutely insane to me. Regardless of what you believe, the [body of evidence for evolution] is enormous enough that a person who denies it is denying fact and reason. But I don't want this is to turn into an evolution debate.\n\nMy question is, if a large portion of America doesn't believe in evolution, then do they still let their kids learn about dinosaurs? Do the kids still have a \"dinosaur phase\"? I know Creationists have a few ways of [justifying dinosaurs without evolution] but it just seems to me that the topic of dinosaurs is something that most Creationist parents would want to sweep under the carpet. I don't know.\n\nCaveat: I know things are different in different states and different communities. If you don't want to generalise, tell me about your specific upbringing.", "summary": "many Americans don't believe in evolution. dinosaurs are closely linked to evolution and the age of the Earth. do American kids still have a dinosaur phase?"}
{"id": "t3_2gkuo2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32F] with my BF [35M] three years, he broke up with me suddenly via email and then asked to stay together still.", "post": "Up until last week everything seemed fine to me. We were not fighting and there were no major issues. Then seemingly out of the blue he was depressed/upset for a few days, then he broke it off with me via email. A day later he asked to talk about it and he decided he wants to stay together to work on the problems together (apparently he felt like he was losing himself and it was all about me, although he said I did nothing to make him feel that way, it was his mindset).\n\nI ended up taking him back but I am not sure if I am ignoring a huge red flag here. This was completely out of character and I feel like everyone makes mistakes, but am I being a doormat?", "summary": "35 yr old bf broke up with me via email then I took him back. I am afraid I am ignoring a huge red flag and being too forgiving."}
{"id": "t3_3etoec", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Realtionships] Me [21 F] with my husband [31 M] of 1 1/2 years, keeps trying to suckle my breasts during sex and doesnt really respect my boundaries.", "post": "We were intimate after I apologized for being very nitpicky and argumentative lately and he said he really wanted to suck on my breasts (which I know he loves and I do let him do sometimes) He attempted to once and I stopped him and continued but once the second time came around (attempting to do it again) I pushed his face away got upset and stopped sex. I asked what he was doing and he claims he was not trying to do this and \"doesnt know\" what he was trying to do.  He also got upset that he didnt climax and I got upset that I felt I was disrespected and made to feel uncomfortable and then guilty on top off that.", "summary": "Husband wants tits in his mouth I do not and I feel he doesnt respect that. Am I overreacting/What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2f2xd8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 F] with my boyfriend [22 M] of one year, I can't figure out if we should stay together or not.", "post": "So I have no doubt that I love my boyfriend. We've had a really tough first year. Lots of short break ups. I've been dealing with a new anxiety problem and its been tough on both of us. \n\nAt one point we broke up long enough that I met someone very interesting, went on a date, had the best sex of my life. I remembered what it felt like to be lusted after or wanted.\n\nEver since that break I can't decide if I want to be with him or be single. What I love about being single is feeling wanted. I know my bf loves me but he never lusts for me. If I ever have doubts he never fights for our relationship. He tells me he just wants me to be happy, but if he showed some passion towards being with me it would fufil that need to be wanted. \n\nAlso our relationship is kind of stagnate. Were both in the same exact situation as last year. I'm worried that he isn't focused enough on becoming successful. \n\nBut our relationship provides love, comfort, support, the best friendship I've ever had, openness. These things I know I won't find from dating. And these things are so important for me. \n\nFor some reason feeling wanted makes me feel like I'm at my best. I'm the most confident I can be. I feel good. And this need is enough to make me doubt wanting to be in my relationship. I literally cannot decide which is more important to me.", "summary": "My relationship doesn't make me feel wanted. Enough so that I can't decide if we should stay together or go our separate ways."}
{"id": "t3_2zev6h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29/M] with my girlfriend [32/F] 2 years, her ex-boyfriends family.", "post": "my current girlfriend of two years as a close relationship with her ex-boyfriends family. And she wants to go hang out with them (ex won't be present) me personally don't like the idea and I think is wrong and disrespectful. She knows I don't like it that's why she has not seen them since we been together but still talks to them biweekly at least once. She invited me to come with her but I don't think that's a good idea and it will be really awkward. But she says she's going to see them soon with or without me and I don't know how to deal with this. What would you do if you are in this position? Also do you think it's worth leaving somebody over it?", "summary": "would you be okay with your current boyfriend or girlfriend hanging out with the ex's family if he/she wasn't there?"}
{"id": "t3_1fstco", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My coworkers do not ask me[f21] to go to lunch with them", "post": "I am a 21 year old female programmer intern at a very small company. This is my second time working here after interning in a previous semester. I get along well with a majority of my coworkers but I'm timid and I dont know how to say \"Can I go to lunch with you guys?\" When a group of them leaves to get food together. Every day one of the guys who started working here while I was gone comes in and asks a few of the guys to come to lunch with him. But no one ever asks me if I'd like to join. \n\nThere are also 2 other interns. One of them makes it very clear, indirectly, he has no desire to interact with me socially (He was here last time). The other one is new and I havent said more than 10 words to him since we started, but I would like to try to be more social with my coworkers by going out to lunch with them and I dont know how to approach this situation without coming off needy or something? \n\nsorry if this is the wrong place; direct me to the right subreddit if there is a better one?", "summary": "I am too timid and scared of being rejected to show my coworkers I want to go to lunch with them when they go together; they do not ask me if I want to come."}
{"id": "t3_1jxmwb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I [24M] move forward with live-in SO [34F]?", "post": "The points: \n\n* I work in IT and am a pretty solitary guy, having her in my life makes me so much more at ease.  I have general anxiety so this is important.  \n\n* I've never really felt \"love\" from anyone but her, I had a messed up childhood so having someone this close to me is new and exciting\n\n* My college days were relatively intense, I'm yearning for the excitement of being single again but don't want to hurt SO, I'm constantly thinking about peers my age, eyes always wandering, not sexually attracted to SO anymore\n\n* She's from another country on a student visa, been living with me for 8 months.  she moved in because she was living with 6 other girls in a 2br place, all worked at the same whip-wielding restaurant to pay for school\n\n* Obviously hurting someone sucks and the feeling of being alone is terrifying (new city, no close friends)... but I do feel trapped, like I could be growing a lot more.  Was formerly polyamorous, jumped into this on impulse.  \n\n* I told her I never intend on getting married or having kids.  She accepted that, we've been monogamous for 18 months \n\n* she doesn't know many other people so I offer some level of security, but taking that away by breaking up would ruin a big part of her life, she might go back home", "summary": "feeling trapped/antsy/cheaty with live-in SO, I want to go out and mingle and make mistakes and experiment, but I don't want to ruin this girl's life"}
{"id": "t3_heuqq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "14 Tillion Dollars, What Does Reaching the Debt Ceiling Really Mean?", "post": "Aparently on monday the United states has reached its debt ceiling of 14 trillion dollars, and while i'd like to consider myself fairly well informed on how it got into this position of massive debt im not entirely clear on what reaching a debt ceiling means for the American economy.\n\nProposals from both sides of the political spectrum say that a reduction of spending is needed (with democrats proposing raising taxes in the upper braket?) but how big of a chunk of an anual budget would really be needed to put a dent in 14 trillion? You dont accumulate that kind of debt over night and i have difficulty seeing exactly how any reduction could even allow them to break even let alone start reducing this debt load given the rather large deficit administrations have been running.\n\nAnd lets say for a minute that they cant figure out a way to ease off this debt ceiling, what are the consiquences for inaction? What are other means of solving this issue?", "summary": "what does reaching the debt ceiling mean for the American government? How big a budget cut is going to be needed? what ae the consiquences of allowing debt to grow significantly beyond 14 trillion?"}
{"id": "t3_1kjgoq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[18F] want to help my little brother [17M] with ideas to come closer to a [16F] girl in school.", "post": "My brother has a crush on a girl for at least a half year. She has start the same school as he but they don't hang out in the same groups. He does text with her on facebook and on the mobile, but he don't know any ideas for getting them to know each other better. He has been on dances and even danced with her one evening, but when he asked her if they could be together she said that she don't know him so well yet...\n\nThis issue is something that he only speaks to me about, not our mother and I will be moving to another town in a couples of weeks and I just want to help him. I'm not so good in dating tips, because I just talked with my now SO of soon 2 years one night and met him the next day and then we were together. (Short story). \n\nHe and I live in a small village and she lives in a village maybe 15 km away. The nearest town is about 45 km away and we live in Finland. They both have only mopeds and every cinema, bowling hall etc. is in the town 45 km away (30 km from her house). He doesn't want my mother to know everything, because she's very annoying with these kinds of stuff..\n\nAny advise, like things they could do, tips for him? I'll be very happy if I could help him a little. :)", "summary": "My brother has his first crush on a girl and when he asked her if they could be together, she answered that she doesn't know him so well yet. Any advise for him?"}
{"id": "t3_54ch4e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18 M] Ex [18 F] of 3 months says she misses me but doesn't love me. Can I start feelings again?", "post": "My ex broke up with me because she lost feelings. She tells me that it was a good relationship and she wishes she didn't lose feelings but she had to do what was right and not stick around just for my sake, which I understand and am thankful she didn't. \n\nMy Ex and I still talk almost every day, and recently I sent her a snaphat of one of 'our songs' with a funny caption. She texted me almost immediately saying that she is upset and misses me heaps, but she still has no feelings so we won't be able to date again.\n\nMy question is, how to I start those feelings up again? I miss her too and wish we didn't break up so I want to try and get her to catch feelings again but I don't know how to go about it especially when it seems like she is rejecting the idea of trying?", "summary": "Ex says she misses me, says she wants to get back but doesn't act that way. How can I reignite feelings?"}
{"id": "t3_2wwfsc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my friends [20sF] of 6 years, am I just being ridiculous?", "post": "Last summer I met a girl online who we'll call Jo. Jo had just moved to my city, and we met up and became friends. I introduced her to my friends and she started coming to our group get togethers.\n\nOver the months, I started realizing that Jo was extremely high maintenance and controlling. I felt like every few weeks she would be angry at me about something trivial.\n\nThe final straw was when I offered to introduce her to one of my single guy friends. She asked me to find out if he was interested. Unfortunately he was not, and when I told her this she took it out on me like it was somehow my fault. That was the final straw. I felt like our friendship was toxic and told her that she was too demanding and I couldn't be friends anymore. This was about three weeks ago.\n\nI didn't tell any of my friends in the group (except for one because I sought her advice) because I didn't know what to do. Now I feel like she's doubled how much she's hanging out with my friends and I am going to run into her this weekend.\n\nR/Relationships, please give me a reality check here. Is it completely wrong of me to tell my friends what happened? I feel bad putting them in a position to choose, but on the other hand I have been friends with all of them for years and want their support. I don't really know what to do. I've never been in this situation before.", "summary": "I had a friend break up with a toxic person. She's in my friend group because I introduced her to everyone. She's now doubling how much she's around, and I feel caught between a rock and a hard place."}
{"id": "t3_1dv4nl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (20M) become ok with my GF (20F) texting other guys", "post": "We've been dating for almost two years. My GF will often have 2-3 guys she is \"texting\" at a time. I assume they are all harmless convos but I cant get the worst case scenarios out of my mind like she is cheating on me with these guys or something. She says they are just friends but it doesnt ease my mind much. And I know she doesnt mean any harm by it. She's an attention craver. I think it stems back to daddy issues since she didnt grow up with a dad or much attention as a child. Anyway the problem is that sometimes she'll receive a text and I know its from one of these guys. I feel like this shouldnt be a big issue but I have a lot of insecurities when it comes to girls texting other guys. Ive had bad relationship exprriences with this in the past. Anyway my first instinct is to badger her about it. Asking things like, \"whos that?\" or \"is that a guy?\". Its just the way I am to be nosy like that but its not good. Any time I ask she gets really defensive and irritated that I ask so many questions and feels like I dont trust her. I know that me being like this is only hurting my relationship. \n\nHow do I get over these insecurities and stop being so nosy?\n\nIs this normal?\n\nDo I have a right to ask these questions? \n\nThanks!", "summary": "girlfriend has guys she texts to and I cant help but be nosy and ask questions and I can see its starting to hurt the relationship. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_13ejkp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I[f21] tell my parents that my SO[m22] is traveling across the Atlantic to visit me while I'm in Europe?", "post": "My parents are Indian, and though they are fairly open-minded with most topics, they don't approve of my white boyfriend who I've been dating for almost 2 years (I told them about him 1 year ago). I am now doing a short internship abroad for 3 months, and he is planning on visiting. Should I tell my parents about this visit, especially if it will upset them greatly and disapprove of our decision to get more 'serious'? I know the easier thing to do would be not never tell them he visited, and to enjoy his company without having to deal with family drama. But is this a cop-out?", "summary": "Indian parents don't approve of white boyfriend, and I'm wondering if I should tell them he's visiting me abroad, staying in my room, etc."}
{"id": "t3_2lojrl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22F] need advice about my sister [20F], depressed college drop out furry.", "post": "Last week my sister told me that is now a furry. \n\nMy sister dropped out of university after one semester two years ago. She's been living with my parents since then. She goes to a community college, but she has failed most of her classes there. She has almost no friends, and she spends most of her time alone in her room. She is very into anime, cosplay, MLP, and is now making a 'fursuit'. I'm very concerned about her. She seems to have no goals, dreams, or ambition and she keeps falling into weirder and weirder crowds. I've suggested that my parents kick her out into a student apartment, so that she will be surrounded by other girls her age. \n\nShe will be 21 soon, on her way to adulthood, and she has shown no sign of growing up. She finally got her first minimum wage job about a month ago. My parents have saved up around 20K for her college fund, so she has the resources to go to college, but she cannot seem to pass her classes. She began taking Vyvanse for ADHD a few months ago, but I do not know if that has made any improvement. She has had boyfriends, but every one of them has been jealous and abusive.\n\nShe had an extremely abusive boyfriend a few years ago, who apparently beat and raped her before my parents got her out of that relationship. She has been in counseling because of that, and was diagnosed with ADHD and PTSD. I'm sitting here with my Mom and we're pretty much at a loss here on how to handle this.", "summary": "Sister is a dropout loser who was abused by an ex-boyfriend and has now dipped into the furry fandom. Aside from counseling, what would shake her out of this?"}
{"id": "t3_4dm0iz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22 F] father [47 M] just told me he is dating someone my older sister's [25 F] age. Feeling conflicted with the information.", "post": "My parents are separated and have been for going on three years. My mom moved away and I still live with my dad while I finish University. \n\nMy dad has been seeing someone and when this person comes over he asks me to not be at the house. The other day, after a few nights of this, he told me the reason that I couldn't be there was that the girl he is seeing is 25 and she thought I would judge her.\n\n I feel like I have been put in a very awkward position because my older and younger sister don't know about it. I want to talk to them but I also don't want to tell them because I would have honestly preferred not knowing about it.", "summary": "My dad is dating a girl the same age as my older sister and I feel creeped out and awkward about it. I talk to my sisters about everything but I don't know if I should tell them about this."}
{"id": "t3_39z88t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] broke up with my SO [19 F] of 3 years a month or two ago.... Where do i even start to rebuild my social life and look for new relationships?", "post": "I poured all my time into her and my hobbies, i have a few friends online that have moved far away and no one in person currently to spend time with at all. I don't know how to meet new people currently. I'm fixing to be going into Bartending but i don't necessarily want to meet people at my job... Where do I begin? Its at the point that i might be ready to start dating again, but i'm not sure where to start with that either... \n\nI'm quite the nerd and enjoy lots of stuff other people would think is geeky or nerdy so this MIGHT be a factor to consider.", "summary": "No idea how to meet people that i'd want to be friends with or how to meet girls i might want to be in a relationship with due to me being socially awkward and nerdy."}
{"id": "t3_2ytgj1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my almost-boyfriend?[25M] met at one night stand, been seeing for a week, great guy, scared of him drifting away", "post": "Been with this guy for a week. Knew him previously, but didn't really talk. We both got it on at a party, now we're seeing each other, kind of. Still extremely fresh. Since then we've hung out a couple of times, at the beach, and talked for hours. I'm actually starting to really like this guy and want to be with him and get to know him better. He's got a business trip for 10 days as of tomorrow though, so we won't be able to hang out. Should I say anything? Should I text him much? He has been the one taking me places for us to hang out and stuff but I don't want to seem clingy or annoying, it's one of my peeves actually. We text a couple of times a day and he always responds with really long texts.\n\nI had a bad experience a few years ago and am still a bit scarred mentally. When I was with him today we were quite intimate with hugging and kissing and I'm scared I came off as \"awkward\". So I told him very superficially what happened in the past. He just looked at me for a long time and gave me a long hug.\n\nI'm scared to scare him away, nobody seems to give me long enough for me to \"open up\" and get totally comfortable with. And this guy is really worth it. I know it's super early yet, but I want to give it my all, and I'm scared he'll drift away because of how I might act or whatever.", "summary": "Fresh relationship, guy leaving for 10 days, scared he might drift away, really want to maintain things \"active\" during those days. What should/shouldn't I say or do?"}
{"id": "t3_1feykg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Dont know if I [M,24] should end it with my gf[F,23]", "post": "My gf works at reception in an hotel, so she only has 1 day off work. This week they gave wednesday and she went with Two friends [m,f] to some restaurant/bar, afterwards she went with them to his friend apartment.\n\nThen they started to smoke weed and she tells me she got uncomfortable and left because she has never tried it. She was previously drinking and it was 5am, so she wasn't in her best condition. so after some time of walking and looking for a cab she was stranded in an unknown place, maybe not that secure. \n\nShe called me but I was half sleep and we weren't speaking for some previous discussion. I didn't say much and she didn't told me what was happening but her voice sounded like she was sobbing.  Anyway, the following day she calls and tells me that same story but that she called his ex bf because she panicked, and he picked her up and left her in her flat. she says they didn't do anything, that he just gave her a ride to her flat.\n\nWe been dating for 5 months and been together as a couple for 7; I think we have a good honest relationship, sometimes we argue but after a few days we are ok and have a great time together. Also his exbf is sort of a douchebag and previously cheated on her, and uses coke so not really a trustworthy person.", "summary": "she went out with some friends, then  called his ex bf to pick her up because she was stranded in some sort of insecure place. "}
{"id": "t3_cjqf5", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Thinking about therapy, implications for employment? Specifically: Peace Corps.", "post": "I've been thinking about seeking some type of therapy (most likely CBT) for awhile now to help me deal with some social anxiety and negative thinking issues for some time. I've never done this sort of thing before and while I think I'm doing pretty well in bettering myself on my own, I'd like to make more progress and get an outside opinion on some things.\n\nMy concern is that if I seek therapy, and use my insurance to help pay for it, that this information could somehow be used against me when looking for employment. I just submitted an application to the Peace Corps and as part of that application it asked if I had ever seen a psychologist and if so, the date I saw them last. I answered no, which is true, but if I now go see a therapist and don't tell them, then I'm likely breaking rules that if they found out, could lead to my termination (and I guess possibly fines/jail).\n\nIs there any way for them to find this out if I don't tell them? I really feel that it's a personal issue that doesn't concern them and I don't want it to influence my chances. Thanks!", "summary": "Thinking about going to therapy for confidence issues. Concerned that if I do, that it could somehow risk future employment."}
{"id": "t3_2nhq5l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] and my boyfriend [20M] for almost 2 years, broke up due to long distance; left it in a bad place", "post": "We were together for almost 2 years at uni, and we even lived together. But I moved across the world for a year abroad of uni, and after about 3 months the strain became too much. \n\nWe mutually broke up, and we were both  ok. But afterwards I didn't take it well; I drunkenly text and rang him. So I decided to delete him off facebook to stop myself from embarrassing myself further. \n\nThis didn't really work, and the last time we talked was when I tried to call sober to clear the air but he was angry that I was contacting him again. He said we'd talk in a few months when I was over it but I told him I didn't want to be friends.\n\nThat was a few weeks ago and I don't know what to do. I feel so awful that I have lost not only my boyfriend but my best friend, and the idea that we can't even be friends really saddens me. I know I was in the wrong and I was so over dramatic, but I feel this is mostly to do with the fact I'm not really enjoying my time abroad.\n\nI kind of wish I'd never left my home country and him, I was happy there. I don't know what I expected to find here but I haven't.\nShould I just leave this and move on?", "summary": "Mutual break-up that I grew to regret, then I was too childish meaning I have lost him even as a friend. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1jzx1t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[18M/F] with my ___ [18M/F] duration, short-description", "post": "[Previous Post](\n\n---\n\nSo I snooped again because I saw a text pop up from him last week on her phone.\n\nLast Saturday night, she texted him out of the blue just before 10pm saying \"what u up to tonight?\". This is a week after he last texted her and she didn't respond. This was in a 20 min gap when she wasn't with me. She was drunk too.\n\nShe then met up with me shortly after at 10pm so didn't respond to any of his texts for the rest of the night/she got too drunk to function and I had to take her home.\n\nThe rest of his texts were about asking her to meet up etc with last text being at 1am. This is when I saw the text as I was still up and her phone was on the table. I decided not to snoop further at that stage.\n\nShe hasn't text back since then.\n\nI know all of this because I only decided to snoop last night because it's been bugging me ever since. She got blind drunk last night so I had to meet up with my mate and her on the street and help her get home. She was in memory blank drunk mode. On a work night too. Which just made me think wtf is going on with her so I snooped when she was passed out.\n\nAlso remembered something she said to me a few weeks ago, she said\n\n\"I used to text other guys when I was with my past boyfriends, because basically I got bored, but with you I don't have to because you're so fun\" or something like that.\n\nAnd ever since she said that it's been in the back of my mind, contributing to my insecurity, and has me thinking oh is this the start of this sort of behavior.\n\nI think you guys are right that I don't trust. And I have to admit it too. I don't trust her that much at the moment due to her behavior and my insecurities.", "summary": "2 weeks ago, guy was texting my girl sounding keen as to meetup. gf didn't text back. I snooped on her phone"}
{"id": "t3_2ykct8", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by zoning out and burning myself", "post": "This fuck up happened less than 30 minutes ago... do I get a prize?\n\nBackground: I am a high school student and I generally pride myself for being part of the upper group as far as intelligence is concerned, but after my fuck up, I have been considerably humbled. \n\nThe Fuck Up: I was in chemistry today and we were doing a lab. In this particular lab we were using a little bowl called a crucible.  The crucible was still wet after being washed at the end of the last class, therefore the first instruction was to heat it over a burner to dry it out. \n\nWe heated the crucible for the required two minutes and sat it at the table to cool, as it was cooling I began to read the instructions for the next step, which required us to find its  mass. My mind had begun to wander from the lab, when I remembered what needed to be done. I promptly said \"Let me just mass this.\" I grabbed the crucible. The blazing hot, just heated by fire for two minutes crucible. It burned, seeking to remove it from my hand and stop the pain. I flung it to the ground and it shattered. \n\nThe looks I received from my teacher and the other students were those of bewilderment. They were bewildered at how I could be so stupid as to grab an incredibly hot crucible. I am shamed, and my burned finger hurts.", "summary": "I forgot what I was doing and grabbed at very hot thing, I burned myself and got looks from other students that make me feel dumb."}
{"id": "t3_1yrlga", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do i not screw this one up?", "post": "**Backstory:** im in my second year of college, i've been known to go out and sleep with a lot of girls.. not really my idea of a good night or anything, but it just kind of happens. havn't really had any real dating experience since freshman year of highschool, 4 girlfriends total, all cheated with close friends, i now have some trust issues, and generally just have sex with people (i have numerous fwb) \n\n**The Situation** so few weekends ago, at the usual bar with a couple of pals, my usual buddies but with some more people from our program. get to dancing with one of the girls, start flirting, figured id try and make a move, but kept being interrupted and she ended up getting really drunk and leaving, but afterwords she added me to facebook and started chatting. girls really cool, valentines day she texts me pretty upset, the guy shes screwing around with told her shes a side chick, ( something i to myself would probably do), so i comforted her, cheered her up abit, got to shooting shit. get the stones to ask her to come watch a movie, she comes over we cuddle for abit, chat all night, and she leaves, we've watched movies and cuddled every night since. \n\n**Where im at right now** ive told all of my fwb that its over, i genuinely do not wanna hurt this girl, and i have feelings for her.she just left from our \"first date\" i made her supper, we watched a movie, cuddled, she wants things to go slow because shes weary. but im falling hard.. \n\n**The Question**soo.. what can i do to help further this, without seeming desperate and overly attached, because with her its not even for sex, i just want her around 24/7.. \n\nSorry that this got so long..", "summary": "im kind of damaged good, who might have a shot at a relationship with a really really cool girl, how do i not fuck this up"}
{"id": "t3_49fnw6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[26M] fianc\u00e9e [27F] is upset I stayed out late after a concert, I think she is over reacting.", "post": "I am in a long distance relationship with my fianc\u00e9e. I really like concerts, and go often. I went to a concert on Friday night, and meet an adorable couple at the show. We really hit it off with them. I liked him a lot, he was really cool, and she was really sweet/precious. We ended up staying out till 5 am and had a blast.\n\nI normally text her when I am home, but apparently I passed out without properly hitting the button. (The message was all typed out and everything.) When I woke up at 9, I apologized for not texting her, because I know she wants me to be safe.\n\nLast night, she basically said I was stupid and unsafe for doing what I did. I didn't know them, and I was not being smart. I told her that I really trusted them, and that they were harmless. She said she didn't care.\n\nI have traveled the world. I have been to over 20 countries and backpacked with strangers for weeks, in the mountains. This makes me nervous that she thinks this was so dangerous, as this seems like such a small thing to me.\n\nAm I thinking about this wrongly?", "summary": "My fianc\u00e9e was extremely upset that I stayed out till 5 am with a couple I met at a concert, because it wasn't safe."}
{"id": "t3_4aoe9l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20m] and my ex [20f] broke up due to her parents beliefs.", "post": "This had been going on most of our relationship (6 months) but her parents go to a Church of Christ and long story short, if I'm not on par with their religion, then I'm not allowed to date her. They've met me once and didn't see that I was good enough so it wasn't allowed no matter what she tried telling them.  She's suffocated by them and doesn't know where she is on religion due to them forcing it on her. She definitely doesn't agree with a lot of their beliefs. \n\nWe have had very strong feelings for each other, especially for 6 months, and I still have that feeling I got the the first week we dated. Now she broke up with me because we have been hiding it the whole time and she started getting frustrated with lying and being scared of them figuring out because the consequences would be pretty great.\n\nNeither her or I are in the position to move out so options on how this could work are very limited. Talking to them really isn't going to do anything because they're so deep in religion, that there's no if, ands, or buts. We're in a rough spot and are both really stressed out and would like to be together but them finding out would not be pretty. Does anyone have an suggestions or experience with this? It'd be MUCH appreciated as I'm very upset and just want this all better.\n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Gf parents are VERY religious and will not allow me to date her unless I'm on the same level as them. Gf doesn't agree with most of their beliefs."}
{"id": "t3_zkgrq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[m24] currently dating a very young girl", "post": "Currently I'm in a pretty good relationship with a girl who is younger than the \"half your age plus 7\" rule. Actually she has just hit the age of consent (16) and we have been dating pretty seriously for 5 months. Honestly I felt pretty bad about it in the beginning because when I was younger I always despised older guys dating really young girls. Now I have become what I once hated.... \n\nI truly felt when I was going to first meet her Chris Hansen was going to show up with some cameras.\n\nBut no, we have not had any sexual relations yet. However, I can honestly say I do like her for much more than that. She is much more mature,  honest and straight forward than other girls my age, which I find really attractive.\n\nShe has also told me her mother met her dad at the age of 15, married 5 years later and were happy ever since. This gives me some kind of hope.\n\nDo Parents Know?: Currently her mother is only aware that we \"talking\" but not the depth of the relationship. I know her mother personally since she is a friend of the family. However, I have not introduced myself as her daughter's companion yet. I would rather do the whole meet and greet the family when she turns 18.\n\nI'm wondering if there are currently any other redditors out there that have had a similar (successful) experience?", "summary": "Dating a very young girl. Like her for who she is and wondering if it can still work out and if anyone else has had a similar experience."}
{"id": "t3_3cqusb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20/F] with my boyfriend [20 M] of 1.5 yrs, want to end things now during long distance though we'll be in the same city in two months.", "post": "I have been dating a guy for about year and a half. I have been having feelings toward ending the relationship for some time now (and I've mentioned this to him). We are currently in different cities for the summer but we'll be in the same city by September (where we both attend school). I'm sure the physical distance between us now hasn't helped, but we visited each other recently and I didn't feel the spark that i used to. Is it terrible to end it during long distance when we'll be seeing each other again so soon? Do i wait and give it a chance to be saved when we get back? We are starting to feel like only friends. \nI know he does not want to end things. I feel stuck. I've met someone in this city whose sparked my interest. I feel guilty, but mentally this relationship has felt distant to me for some time.\n\nNot sure if I should wait, doing it in person is usually suggested, or bite the bullet and do it now.", "summary": "Do i end my relationship during long distance, or wait two months until we are in the same city? I don't see a future together."}
{"id": "t3_39w22d", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Wrongfully sent to collections. Please help.", "post": "Just checked my credit score. Instead of the usual 679, I see 587. I start freaking at see that I have a collection agency after me for $679. T-Mobile sent me to collections on a phone that I returned to them months ago. I called them multiple times months ago after I got collection notices about it. The last rep I spoke to, probably 3 months ago, told me they received the phone back and all was fine. Then I check my credit score today, and this. I'M FUCKING BEYOND LIVID\n\nWhat do I do? If I dispute it and they remove me from collections, will my credit go back to 679?", "summary": "Returned phone to T-Mobile, got sent to collections even after confirmation of them receiving it. Credit ruined. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1mw30s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[26F] with my husband [38M] of six years, yells more and more everyday. How can I make it stop???", "post": "My husband turned down an offer and hasn't received another one in two weeks. He has applied at 100+ places and is stressed. He has begun to yell. \n\nMy husband grew up in a family where the dad yelled his wife and siblings into submission. I do not want my husband to become his dad. Within the last few weeks though he has. Today he even tried to yell me out so I'd succumb to his desires. He also has been turning things around and blaming me for everything. \n\nI want my calm loving husband back. Instead I have a man who yells. How can i solve this?", "summary": "I miss my non yelling husband and am concerned he'll become verbally abusive like his dad is. How can I fix this?"}
{"id": "t3_3szwub", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/m] I am in my freshman year of college with my girlfriend [18/f]. I am having an easier time adjusting and it's putting a strain on our relationship.", "post": "I'll try to make this as brief as I can.\n\nMy girlfriend and I started dating during our junior year in high school and we ended up going to the same university. When we first moved in, we were both a bit overwhelmed, and it was really helpful to the both of us that we had each other during the transition. \n\nSince I have always adjusted pretty easily to new situations, I started to become pretty comfortable around week 3. I have gotten know a ton of people, I've made new friends and I've been doing very well in all my classes.\n\nShe, on the other hand, has been having a tougher time. She feels like she hasn't made any friends, is really struggling in her classes, and she's feeling pretty lost. I've been doing everything I can to be there for her, and spend all the time with her that I can, but it seems like we're on two different wavelengths.\n\nOne of the main reasons we're running into trouble is that since I'm meeting a ton of people and having a great time, she's worried that she's holding me back from everything. The thing is, I want to meet new friends and everything, but I wanna do it with her. I always try to get her to hang out with my friends, but she never seems happy. When I ask her why, she always says \"they're your friends, you all know each other.\"\n\nIt's beginning to feel like I have to choose between her and my friends, and I don't want that. I love being with her, but it seems like lately, I'm all she has. \n\nAny advice would be greatly appreciated! Sorry for the long post!\n\n(", "summary": "I'm making new friends, girlfriend isn't, and it's feeling more  and more like I'm having to sacrifice having a transformative college experience for her to be happy.)"}
{"id": "t3_187d6t", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "How do I start moving from college/parents to financial independence? (US)", "post": "I'm starting this by saying that I realize I'm extremely lucky, and I don't want to fuck it up. I don't have a precedent for my situation, so I need your collective advice:\n\nIn a few years, I'll be leaving college with no debt. I've managed a very small part-time job in addition to being full time student ($2400 in 2012, which I will file taxes on!). I'm looking at ~$3000 for 2012, + an internship stipend (which won't be much).\n\nI've been depositing my checks at a 2:1 Savings:Checkings ratio.\n\nI don't have a car and I won't need one. My room and food is taken care of (I even managed to get free housing for the summer) while I'm in college, and my parents have offered me a (rent-free) couch while I'm job-searching post-graduation.\n\nBasic goals for post-graduation:\nOut of my parents' house by winter, into an apartment, with a job.\nIt's not very realistic, but some recent alum from my department have managed it.\n\nWhat else do I need to consider? What do I need?\n\nI've been reading posts here, but I haven't seen too many very beginner posts, and I did check out the FAQs, but I don't exactly have money to do anything with.", "summary": "Graduating college next year without debt, no credit cards, small bank account. What do I need to do to become a financially independent and fiscally mature young adult?"}
{"id": "t3_o9obg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Furniture suggestions...long term project", "post": "Hi there Just moved from NY to SF with my wife and we are going to start out on our first place together since we stopped being broke-2nd-hand-ikea-furniture users. Starting out so on a budget and honestly, have no idea how to think of interior design so looking for help.\nThis intends to be a long term project, one where i post pictures of before and after, compile a list of stores and design ideas!\nDescription: live in SF victorian apartment (well, plan on, once we find it! still in a sublet), not terribly large\nSo, first task: what are the core pieces of furniture in each room? For instance, in the bedroom, i am guessing its the bed that would decide the color and kind of accessories like chest of drawers? And in the living room, i suppose i should get a couch before anything else?", "summary": "new house, building it out from scratch, looking for help from reddit, will post all advice/pictures i collect over time...long term project"}
{"id": "t3_10aw9z", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My apartment is infested with mice and management has done very little to help. What are my options?", "post": "So I moved into my apartment back in May. Things have constantly gone wrong since day one. Now usually when something goes wrong they take a couple days to come fix which isn't a big deal as long as its not something serious. Shortly after moving in we noticed mouse crap in the cabinets. Then we stated seeing them. We told maintenance and they came by and put traps down. We caught a good 3 or 4 mice. Then we started catching 1 every couple of weeks and seeing/hearing them every couple of days. The apartment management just kept on sending us traps. Now the mice seem to have had babies because we see mice multiple times a day and they are getting into all of my food. management seems to think that providing us traps is all they have to do and its our problem. This is a serious problem that traps won't fix. We need an exterminator but they clearly don't want to pay for one to come. But this is a health risk in my opinion. Is there any sort of legal action I can take? Or at least threaten to take to get them to act?", "summary": "Horrible mouse infestation in my apartment to the point of being a health risk. Management only wants to lay traps. Is there any way I can make them call an exterminator?"}
{"id": "t3_1uqtx2", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Not sure if I should approach my girlfriend about cheating on me [21m/f]", "post": "This is something that's been eating at me for the last few months and I just want to get it off my chest.\n\nSome back story. She had a boyfriend before me let's call him, John. She and John and a pretty rocky relationship from what I was told and witnessed myself. Anyway after a while they broke up and we got together and it was great. Fast forward to when I was away on holiday during Christmas 2012, she ends up seeing him and says how nothing happened between them. However after another incident in August she let me read through her texts and I found one from that day saying \"Last night can't mean nothing. What was i thinking. Im not that type of person\" And then a day or so after he sent something saying \"Sorry about your neck\" (she was big on biting necks and loves it done to her too)\n\nSo yeah she says she didn't sleep with him when she told me about this when it happened. But I don't think I believe her just because how she's lied to me in the past about seeing him and especially after reading those messages. Should I bring it up with her somehow or what? Thank you for reading it feels good to get this out.", "summary": "Gf saw her ex last christmas, said they didn't fuck, but found questionable texts months later, wat do?"}
{"id": "t3_1bmpmh", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My boyfriend (23/m) cheated on me (21/f) over webcam after four+ years", "post": "So me and my boyfriend have been together for four and a half years! We recently moved out together and have our own lovely apartment... Out relationship seemed to be like no other.. I never questioned the love, loyalty, and honesty we had for each other. We never hit rock bottom and we never had serious issues together. Everything was near perfect. About a month ago, I was on his computer and came across his Facebook.. Which was logged In already... Found mail from a girl that lead me to look on his Skype. Went onto his Skype and found something I wish I never found! My boyfriend had a very intimate Skype call and convo with a girl he got off a webcam site! The things he said to her really hurt me... He said things I have never heard him say! The call lasted 15 minutes and they were both naked on the call, doing you know what.. I do classify this as cheating and surely he would have known i thought that.. I am having a lot of trouble forgiving him... he tried to convince me at first how he thought it was not cheating, he has since tried showing me he made a big mistake.. But I don't know if I can get past this.. It's ruined the special relationship we had together and I don't feel like I love him the same way.", "summary": "my boyfriend of over four years masturbated with another woman over Skype, in need of advice, has something like this happened to you before?!"}
{"id": "t3_54bcpq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (17M) asked a girl (16F) to homecoming that I hasn't gone to our school for over a year. How do I break the ice so it won't be so awkward when we meet?", "post": "So I asked this girl I had a huge crush on last year to hoco via text. We didn't really talk much last year but getting to know her via internet she's a really cool and very intelligent girl and I grew the man power to ask her to go with me. \n\nHere's the problem, I haven't sent her in over a year and she lives half an hour away how do I break the ice so it won't be awkward when we see each other face to face. \n\nWe're both really socially awkward and I feel like I set myself up for an awkward night. But she was really stoked I asked so I feel like she may have feelings for me.", "summary": "asked a girl to hoco I haven't seen in a while and I'm wondering how I should start up conversation or break the ice when we meet"}
{"id": "t3_20c4kv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with [20 F], she apparently wants to meet me but I have no idea what to do.", "post": "So I'm a student at a university and I've seen a girl around a few times from a distance who I thought was absolutely gorgeous. Since she is in a sorority and me a fraternity, I know a lot of her friends and when I asked them about her they were quick to tell me she's the perfect girl personality wise for me. So, one of our mutual friends who is really close to this girl told her about me and told me she wanted to meet me, gave me her number, and said it would be okay to text her so I did. We had a decent conversation going and it abruptly stopped. It was late, she probably fell asleep. So I followed the double texting rule and waited three days to try to reach out again. After I got the conversation going I asked her if she would like to meet me for coffee and she said she wouldn't be able to that week because of how busy she was with a weeklong philanthropy event. Even though she kept the conversation going for a while (that abruptly stopped again) I took it as a rejection and decided I wouldn't press it again. After that, I told another mutual friend who sits next to her in class and she said she actually was really busy with this philanthropy event and not to take it personal and that she'd talk to her about relationships without mentioning my name. So they talked and this girl told her a guy had been mean to her and she wanted to focus on school.\n\nThis was about three weeks ago, and her close friend said she'd give it one more try. I want to. This girl apparently is super sweet and has a great personality and I really want to get a chance to meet her but I don't know what to do and I'm scared of coming on too strong and creeping her out. What's your take?", "summary": "Mutual friends try to set me up with a girl and I'm not sure how to deal with it. Need an outside opinion."}
{"id": "t3_33cmyi", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "We did it! Review + Pictures!", "post": "My husband (!!) and I tied the knot April 9th, we planned every little detail ourselves and paid for it ourselves. (Well with some help from my parents). And all decor was DIY'D. It was a LONG year and a half, but seeing it all come together was worth it!\n\nSome things that went well...\n\n* Seeing my husband's face during our first look. He bawled like a baby and it was the most treasured moment of the whole day and probably my whole life. \n\n* Our officiant killed it! We had guest after guest comment on how beautiful the ceremony was, some said it was the most emotional wedding they'd ever been too. And a friend's mom said our vows made her question her marriage (yeah, that was a weird comment). But it was worth it to custom curate our ceremony with our officiant, it was so special and even though I was so nervous I'm glad we wrote our own vows. \n\nThings that went wrong...\n\n* My father in law hit my day of coordinator's car before the ceremony... I didn't find out about it until we checked into our hotel that night. But during our first dance it was funny to hear my husband go \"I have so much to tell you...\" Everything was fine though! He just scraped the side of her truck with his, but she handled it like a PRO. She just told him well, today is you son's day so we'll exchange info later and take care of it tomorrow, let's worry about the wedding first. She really was just fantastic all around.\n\nAdvice...\n\n* Get a day of coordinator if you can. It is SO much easier than taking care of it yourself/having a friend or family member do it. We paid $500 for a DoC to setup/break down everything and she really made the day go smoothly and kept us on top of everything.\n\n* Make as detailed of a timeline as possible. It was a little stressful coordinating who was leaving the hotel with who to the venue, etc. Also my husband had to pick a lot of people up at the airport, so maybe pay a friend from your area to be a designated taxi. It was different with us since 90% of our guests were out of town.", "summary": "My wedding was the best day of my life. Hands down. All the stress, planning, everything was SO worth it. :) "}
{"id": "t3_35gz3l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (17m) not sure if I still love my gf (17f), and I think I have a crush on our good mutual friend (17f)", "post": "So my gf (let's call her Amy) and I have been dating for over 3 years. We've gone through a lot of things together, good and bad. She was my first kiss, first gf, and I lost my virginity to her. We have had many talks about the future and getting married to each other. \n\nWe regularly hang out with the same group of friends in and out of school. It consists of roughly 10 people. Around 3 of them are guys. The thing is we are all very close and hang out pretty much all the time. I've been getting very close to one of the girls in the group (let's call her Nancy). I was friends with her before I started dating Amy. Recently, I've gotten very close to Nancy. I've told her many things that I wouldn't even tell Amy. Some people have accused us up of \"flirting\" and have told Amy, who easily gets upset. Now, I'm a friendly person to begin with. I'm fine with making contact with all of my friends and I mess around with all of them, so I don't think of it as flirting. \n\nThis has put me under a lot of pressure recently though. Since our group is mainly girls, I talk to girls pretty much everyday. But I feel like I have to act differently due to my gf. I feel like I can't laugh as much or talk as much, so Amy won't get jealous. \n\nNancy trusts me and I trust her. We're pretty much best friends. But I think I might be developing a crush on her. \n\nI've started to care for Amy a little less, but I'm pretty sure I still love her. Breaking up with her would also be very awkward because we hang around the same group of people and our class is very small (97). Thank you.", "summary": "I'm not sure if I still love my girlfriend.  I might have a crush on a mutual friend. Breaking up would be awk because we have the same friends."}
{"id": "t3_okv1j", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just got a call about my grandpa...I need your help reddit.", "post": "Growing up I always knew there was something off about him. I loved him to pieces, but he was always adamantly anti-government and anti-corporation. I know a lot of us redditors are too but as time went on its manifested its self in different ways.\n\nWe went to the movie theater one day and he complained that someone took a picture of him. He thought he was being spied on and wanted to leave. (There was no one there, it was in his mind)\n\nOur family got a call yesterday, and it seems now he won't even leave his trailer to get food. He told the neighbor that the voices told him to stand in a hole in his house to keep people away. He's getting worse, and tomorrow I'm going to be going with my mom and anut to help deal with the situation.\n\nI was reading on wikipedia that only .3 - .7% of the population is effected Schizophrenia; which is what we believe it is as this point. I'm really hoping I can find someone to help me out here. Have you known someone who has had Schizophrenia, how did you deal with it? Any advice you can give us?", "summary": "Found out my grandpa has Schizophrenia, we're going up to try to help him tomorrow, need tips and advise. "}
{"id": "t3_2dtt71", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25F] just amended bad blood with my ex [27M] and now desperately need help with a response.", "post": "My ex and I dated for 6 1/2 years and it ended HORRIBLY! He started all but dating this other girl while we were still together (emotional cheating, never anything physical). The thing is, the whole time I was reading his texts behind his back and saw his conversations with the girl, our mutual best friend, and his sister all shit talking me while having this relationship develop. I felt so crazy constantly reading his texts but everytime I would look I would find something for months. Finally, I got the strength to dump him, told him I hate him and never talk to me again, and got a new BF about a month later and we're so happy together and living together now. The ex is still with the same girl. \n\nTODAY I contacted my ex for the first time in a year and a half. I just said I don't hate you and I'm sorry for how I reacted. He said he was so happy I didn't hate him and gave me some updates about his life. It's been friendly messages and it feels like this weight is lifted off my shoulders because I don't have this burned bridge out there in the universe. (my current bf knows everything and is perfectly fine with me getting the closure I need). \n\nHere's the thing: I've always, always thought for the last year and a half that I will finally be completely healed once I can tell him that I reacted so strongly because I was reading his texts and knew the whole situation. He only told me that he went to the library with her once, so he thinks I just reacted in a crazy strong way over that. I need to say to him: Look, I reacted so strongly because I was reading the texts between you and her, you and our mutual friend, and you and your sister. I saw all the shit you talked about me and I thought that you hated me which made me want to hate you. I need to say something like that to him now to finally put this all behind me but I don't know how to say it without making myself seem insane and like I'm still living in the past. I need advice on this desperately please help.", "summary": "Ex bf and I just made amends but I still need to tell him something for my own healing and don't know the right way to go about it."}
{"id": "t3_3z81v0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24, M] with my girlfriend[23, F] have been together long distance almost a year, needing advice on long term plan.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together almost a year, but it's been entirely long distance (9 hours apart) with us taking turns seeing each other on weekends twice a month, and spending a week together on a couple occasions. \n\nMy girlfriend was job hunting at the beginning of this past summer when there were two jobs opening up. One about 20 minutes from my house, another an hour further north of where she had been living. The job that was further away gave her $10K more a year than what she would've made living by me. I had no problem encouraging  this path because we had only been together a few months at that time, and wouldn't want her throwing her future away for me. \n\nDue to some unfortunate circumstances (my dad being in the hospital, her having to work multiple hours of overtime, a couple deaths in her family, etc.) we haven't been able to see each other this month and during the holidays. She told me a few weeks ago that she felt bad that she couldn't come home to me and felt lonely even though we can and do Skype, and basically that the distance is hurting her. I had already been thinking about moving up there, but was going to wait until the school year is over so I don't leave my employer in a sticky situation.\n\nI'm a teacher at a private school, and even though my pay isn't awful, I'd be the one to make the move since it's an easier move for me. It also helps that I have friends that live in and around the same city she lives and works in. I want to offer to move up there, but don't know how to bring it up to her as we've been somewhat distant with everything going on.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I have been together almost a year, entirely long distance, need to figure out how to bring up an idea on a long term plan and me moving to the city that she lives in."}
{"id": "t3_2qbd4z", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by contaminating an Indian village's drinking water source.", "post": "So this happened a few weeks ago on my holiday to India. Back story: Indian toilets don't usually have toilet paper and are more often than not simply a hole in the ground that you squat over. I went to deposit a particularly nasty load of liquid shit or what the locals refer to as \"Delhi belly\". I'd also recently been given some very expensive glasses by my parents and was under pain of death not to lose them. So I was squatting down unleashing this never ending torrent of diarrhoea when my glasses dropped off my head and fell down the hole. In a state of blind panic and fear I shoved my hand into the bottomless pit of shit in an attempt to find my glasses and, after dipping my arm elbow-deep in shit, eventually discovered them and pulled them out. As they were covered in shit I didn't put them on and instead stumbled around outside half blind to find somewhere to wash them off, finding a small shack surrounded by what I assumed was a queue of people with a huge urn of water inside. Pushing through the crowd, I quickly rinsed my shit covered arm and glasses in this urn of cold water, returned the glasses to their rightful place and, feeling rather pleased with my lucky escape, strolled outside. I then realised my FU....the queue was full of people holding various jugs and cups and a sign on the shack read \"DRINKING WATER\" in bright red bold letters.", "summary": "Dropped glasses in shit, washed them in communal drinking water urn for the needy and poor. Feel like an asshole..."}
{"id": "t3_4e4yv3", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Combining finances with my soon to be husband, but I owe him $25,000", "post": "My fiance and I are beginning to combine finances and working through our plan for that. That's not the problem. 1 year ago my fiance paid off my car loan to help me with the accumulating interest. I had/have every intention of paying him back and now I'm in a financial situation where I can. However, our incomes are now going into our joint bank account and it's basically \"our money\". We talked about putting the repayments into a seperate account that is essentially \"his\", but we're not sure if that's the best way to go about it. I will not be able to pay this off completely for a couple years as we are saving for a house as well, so we don't want to wait until I finish paying him back before combining finances.", "summary": "I owe my fiance $25,000 and we are completely combining accounts and finances, how do I pay him back now that it's all \"our money\".. "}
{"id": "t3_yqxur", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend want to give me an \"allowance\". [F 18]", "post": "Throwaway for identity reasons.\n\nMy SO [m 18] and I [f 18] have been dating for five, almost six years and are very serious, despite being so young. We don't live together and he works all week, so we don't see each other very often either. Out of nowhere he starts telling me I need to accept more from him. More gestures, gifts...money. I didn't know how to respond. I've heard of a husband doing this for his wife and vice versa, but never a boyfriend for his girlfriend. After refusing this multiple times, he said *this*, \"It'll make me happy.\" How would it make him happy? How should I respond? Should I take it?", "summary": "SO wants to give me an allowance of $20 a week for no apparent reason. Don't know how to respond."}
{"id": "t3_2nag1d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19F] with my boyfriend [22 M] 6 months, he constantly posts half-naked pictures on instagram", "post": "So he and I both have instagram but I don't post anything just because I like to keep my life private and I'm not crazy about the whole social media thing. \n\nI have no problem with him posting stuff, I like to see all the cute stuff he posts, and he often posts pictures of us. But he also posts shirtless pictures of himself, and sometimes girls will comment saying how attractive he is or whatever. \n\nAm I right to be uncomfortable? I haven't said anything because I don't want to be controlling and I don't really think it's my place. But really, I compliment him all the time and tell him how good looking he is, why does he need constant validation from random strangers on instagram? \n\nMy ex was not into social media that much and I liked that about him. Maybe there are just different types of people, and I am not really compatible with current bf? The attention-craving attitude is really a turn off for me.", "summary": "Bf constantly posts half-naked pictures on instagram, he posts pictures of us too, but the attention he gets from girls makes me uncomfortable and it's making me question our compatibility. Am I being unreasonable?"}
{"id": "t3_u4hqq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Last night I got promoted at work...twice. I've been working there for a week. What are some of your work success stories?", "post": "As is custom, I'll start. \n\nFor one reason or another, my full time job ended up not having any work for me to do during the summer, so I decided to take a part time job. A statewide-famous sandwich shop in my state decided to open up a new store in my town, and I applied and was hired immediately. I started training last week, and we opened the store up for the first time this week.\n\nYesterday, while pulling a double covering for someone else, my boss informs me that I've been promoted, including a raise and further duties with closing the store and sending reports off to the franchise at the end of the night, etc. I'm pleased, since a promotion in a week seems like a good thing to me. Fast forward two hours, and my boss has a personal emergency. He pulls me into his office, explains the situation, and says, \"I hate to drop this all on you tonight, but I'm gonna need you to take over as manager. I figured it'd happen anyway, but wanted to give you more time to ease into it. You gonna be okay to do it?\" I accepted, and he left to handle his business, with me in charge of two teenagers who'd worked there just as long as I had.", "summary": "Took part time job at a new sandwich shop a week ago, got field promoted twice when boss had to leave."}
{"id": "t3_1um6ng", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is there a non-creepy way for me [26M] to approach her [24F] at work?", "post": "Hi there, I'll try to keep it short.\n\nThere is a girl who works at my go-to grocery store who I would like to get to know better. She really brighten's up my day when I go there and I'm absolutley stunned by her everytime I go there. I know it's hard to approach people at work, but the last thing I will do is creep outside the store until she heads home - HELL NO.\n\nI've been thinking of a way to approach her but everything seems kind of creepy, like just going up to her out of the blue and telling her that I think she's cute and that I would like to get to know her better. Is there a smoother way of doing this?\n\nI know nothing about her except for her Name and her Age. But something tells me that I would like to get to know her more. I've never done nor felt the urge to approach somebody outside of a bar.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Trying to make contact with a girl who works at my go-to grocery store, trying not to come off as a creep."}
{"id": "t3_13v1o7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24,f] want to be friends with my best friend from HS [m, 24], but don't know how to without leading him on.", "post": "My friend traveled around the world in the 6 years since HS and we didn't talk much. He recently moved back to our hometown, which gave us the opportunity to hang out this weekend over the holiday. Before I saw him in person we had started texting a bit. It was pretty harmless, but it is clear that he still as feelings for me. When we hung out this weekend it was a bit awkward. I'm not sure if that's because he's not as into me as he thought (I suspect he held onto strong feelings form HS that may or may not hold now) or maybe it was uncomfortable because he does still have feelings for me. Maybe it's something else...?\n\nSo now I'm unsure about how about to handle this. I'd like to continue talking to him, but I also don't want to give him false hope. If it's possible, how do I nurture a friendship without leading him on? Do I let him be the first to call or text? If he cares about me it seems shitty to never initiate contact, but then again this may make him feel false hope... Is this even possible?\n\nI should also note a couple things. There is another female in his life, but she is in another state and they're not in a committed relationship. Also, my partner of 7 years [m, 24] knows that we've been talking and that I hung out with him over break. He is totally find with me talking and hanging out with him.", "summary": "I want to rebuild my friendship with a HS friend, but don't know how to do it without leading him on. How reddit?"}
{"id": "t3_4vsc62", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my bf [24 M] 3 years, Am I wrong to be confused at why he didnt walk the dog?", "post": "MY bf of 3 years are going through a timeoff, my intentions was for me to decide if I wanted to leave or stay. We are 5 days since he moved out. Today he offers to walk the dog while I'm at work. I told him he didnt need to, he insisted.   \n\nSo i've walked the dog at 9 am. He comes over at 3 in the afternoon, and instead of walking the dog right away he stays plays with the dog for a bit and plays computer games for 2 hours. \nHe only takes the dog for a walk at close to 6 pm and only for 10 mins.   \n\nSo I asked im Why did'nt he take the dog to pee right away. He said lazy , it was hot, he played with the dog. He says im not appreciative at all that he made all this effort. I said I dont understand why you let the dog wait 8 hours to pee when you were there earlier. \n\nHe starts saying im domineering, says fuck a lot , tells me i have to always do things my way. Tells me he doesnt deserve this treatment . If I want to do things my way ,I should do it myself.", "summary": "He said he wanted to come and walk the dog, plays computer games instead, walks the dog hours later. He gets upset with me?"}
{"id": "t3_t2s8t", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it weird to find it hard to give sympathy?", "post": "Kind of feeling like a psychopath here...A house burnt down in my town killing all but one survivor. I feel absolutely horrible for all involved but people in his neighborhood who saw the fire happening but aren't particularly close with the family, are up in arms, hysterical, etc. I look at them kind of wtf? They weren't primarily involved and I think it's very selfish of them to be so...affected? by something that doesn't directly have an impact on them. I understand they're upset naturally, but I feel they should be focusing on helping rather than crying. So am I some weird monster who can't feel empathy?", "summary": "I find it hard to feel sympathy for people who aren't directly involved in a tragedy but are extremely upset by it anyways...weird or no?"}
{"id": "t3_4zy8xc", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Waiting on job offer after interview, need advice", "post": "Not sure if this is the correct place to post this, but I am having a bit of an anxiety fit over my current situation. If there is a more appropriate sub, please direct me to it.\n\nI recently graduated from a specialized technical program and since graduating have had a ridiculous number of job offers and interview requests. I have actually turned down a number of interviews. \n\nI had a job lined up several months ago, but it was honestly not something I was very enthusiastic about, I only took the offer because they were the first to contact me and I was not sure what the job market in my field was like. We'll call then company A.\n\nLong story short, I interviewed with another company last week, let's call them company B, and they exceeded all expectations and are basically a dream come true. They paid for my flight to their facility for the interview, put me up in a hotel and paid for a rental car. I had also previously turned in my notice with my current employer at the time, because company A, which I had already accepted an offer from, had expected me to start this coming week. I left the interview with company B feeling confident but without any offer in hand. Fast forward to today, I have notified company A that I won't be able to start with them and so am officially unemployed and awaiting some word from company B.\n\nAm I insane to expect that company B is going to make some kind of offer? Should I be scrambling to find something solid? I have enough funds to keep me going for a few months if absolutely necessary.\n\nTo add some clarification, this is completely out of character for me, I have never left an employer without having a guaranteed job lined up already. I have no experience in this field but have a good amount of general management experience.", "summary": "Had offer from company A, accepted offer, got interview with company B and decided to drop company A and also leave current job without securing new employment. Need advice please."}
{"id": "t3_kx89x", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my suite at college just got busted for a small party. I was in my room doing work not drinking, should I be reprimanded?", "post": "There were approximately 15 people in the suite playing *water* pong and drinking a few beers, doing shots, playing music. All but 1 was underage. \n\nI was in my room doing work because I am a loser and have 3 tests on Monday to study for. \n\nThe RA came in and said party's over and told them to dump the beer, wrote down everyones names, and told everyone who didn't live there to get out. \n\nShe was REALLY nice about it and kept saying that we were all being really cooperative and polite and that would go on the report. \n\nThere was a friend of ours who is an RA there who had just stopped by and got fucked by the timing. There was a girl who will probably get kicked off a sports team, and there was the guy who was 21 who could be in trouble for drinking with minors.\nThis is all of our first offense.\n\nI talked to the RA personally and she said that if my roommates vouch for me not drinking and not being involved that will help my case, but I would probably get in trouble for just plain having knowledge of the party. But technically I never came out of the room for the one and a half hour that the party was going on for.", "summary": "Should I get written up / be in trouble like the rest of my suite-mates and the people involved in a busted party if I wasn't drinking or involved?"}
{"id": "t3_clw37", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need your help - met a 94 y/o woman who is awesome! but she does not have a shower!", "post": "I was at the grocery doing some trading and while waiting for a friend started some idle conversation with an elderly lady. (my friend thought I had already gone, so we talked for a bit). Her parents lived till they were 105 - both of them! She is still kicking so much ass at life- She cooks her own meals, dresses her self, has a great short term and long term memory, still opens the window to yell at the punk kids w/ their loud music. This 94 y/o gal has been through depressions, wars, technological revolutions. she is so happy and sharp, so being a young man I asked her a few questions (how was your teens, travel, work,) one of which was \"is there anything you miss\" and she said well taking a shower. WTF! \"I have a shower but dut to my arthritis I cant get my legs over the side of the tub, so I just use a warsh cloth... you get use to it after a few years\" (she didn't smell so I guess she did a good job of it)... but this made me really sad. I talked to a guy who said if I can find out who owns the building he would call him and make the shower thing happen (walk in shower w/chair and hand rails etc). He knows most every one in town and can call in some favors. so thats where I intend to start - and if the landlord is a slum lord then I'll will find a way to acquire a walk in shower and install it myself! Can you help me find out who owns these apts? I've looked and asked around and... nothing. its gotta be public info some wheres... right?", "summary": "shes 94, lives alone in section 8 (public housing) with a fixed income. Her daughter just passed away (at 80!)"}
{"id": "t3_12hu4b", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[15, almost 16/F] My boyfriend [17/M] and I need to find out how to sleep together in a bed.", "post": "First off, I want to say that yeah, we're kinda young but we take naps together a lot. We're a lazy couple.\n\nWe're both used to sleeping on our stomachs or sides, but I'm finding it hard to find one position that works best. I hug things in my sleep, so spooning with him in the back doesn't really work unless I have an extra pillow, and we don't. However, when I'm in the back, I can't get my bottom arm under him without hurting his side (I have bony arms.) Us facing each other works for a bit, with him hugging me and me holding my arms between his and my chest, but he likes to surround me and I find myself running out of air. I can't think of any other position to sleep in except me lying on his chest, but last time we did that, we both got stomach aches. \n\nI'm hoping that this will help us out once he gets his own place and I start to spend the night there. If we're having troubles napping, I can only imagine how we're going to pull off sleep through the the whole night as well.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Boyfriend [17/M] and I [almost 16/F] like to nap together but fail at sleeping together in a comfy position for both of us. Suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_3eivmw", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Me 18M and 17F girlfriend. Afraid to lose virginity. How can I help her not too freak out?", "post": "I've been dating my girlfriend for eight months now and the topic of sex has come up quite a bit recently. She is really afraid of getting pregnant and she doesn't want to have sex yet. I'm not trying to convince her or push her or anything, I want her to be 100% comfortable when it happens. \nShe is really afraid that she is going to freak out before it happens, or during. She says that it will happen and I've seen little freakouts from her if I get too close to her. I just really want to know how I can help her not freak out, or if she does, how to calm her down enough to continue and be comfortable.\n\nHere's some background info if it helps.\n Her parents sheltered her from sex completely telling her it was bad and making it seem weird and out of place by not talking about it.\n\nI've been helping her get over the \"weirdness\" of the sexual things we do and it is really hard, but we get by.", "summary": "girlfriend was sheltered from sex, dating for 8 months, I want sex, she will freak out before/during. How can I help her through this as comfortably as possible?"}
{"id": "t3_1ifjtr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you respectfully flirt with a woman?", "post": "Lately I have seen a lot of posts about women getting creeped out by guys flirting with them, taking \"no\" to mean \"yes\" and similar things. I agree that women should feel more comfortable with rejecting advances, and all around should have way more freedom in our society to be individuals.\n\nNow, I want to try and be a bit more flirtatious, my best friend who is just naturally friendly, is mock flirtatious with pretty much every guy and girl, and pretty much everyone loves him.\n\nI'm not saying I want to try and be him. But I know that I pretty much never flirt because I feel like if I flirt at all or give any kind of compliment, it could be taken as \"verbal abuse\". For example, I say \"Hey so and so, I love your hair, it looks really good\". There was one time I actually just genuinely liked how a girl's hair looked, it was a unique color, and wanted to compliment her on it. I asked a female friend of mine who was nearby if it would be okay if I told the girl, and my friend says it would have been creepy.", "summary": "How do I flirt with a woman, or even give a member of the opposite gender a compliment, without coming off as creepy or making her uncomfortable?"}
{"id": "t3_21q91n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[19f]Keeping an innocent (but somewhat significant) piece of information from my boyfriend of a few months [21m]...", "post": "Honestly, I'm not sure how significant this piece of information is in the context of our relationship.\n\nI've been dating my boyfriend for a few months now, and he doesn't know that the drunken dance-floor makeout we had a little over a year ago, the first time we met, was my first kiss.\n\nI've kissed plenty of other people since then, so it's not like he's the only person I've ever kissed. I told him that we had kissed on the dance floor last year and he barely remembered it, which I don't have a problem with. \n\nBasically, my first kiss was not that significant emotionally (but it was pretty good), but the fact that I'm dating the guy I had my first kiss with is...interesting. It wasn't his first kiss. He's my first boyfriend; I'm not his first girlfriend. Also, he's the first (and only) person I've had sex with, while I'm not the first person he's had sex with.\n\nShould I tell him that he was my first kiss? Would he find it a funny coincidence, or be a little weirded out that he's been my \"first\" for all these things? I don't want him to think I'm super clingy or that I planned this all out or something. It's true that I was a little extra interested in him the second time we met because of our past encounter, but that definitely didn't become the basis of my attraction to him. \n\nI'm debating between not telling him at all, or waiting until we've known each other for longer. The topic of first kisses may come up at some point before then, though.", "summary": "Should I tell my boyfriend that he was the first person I kissed? (Not the only person; the kiss happened way before the relationship began.)"}
{"id": "t3_1f7zxw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "People who have posted about issues regarding SO's past: do you ever get over it?", "post": "From the very beginning of our relationship a year ago, bf [25] was uncomfortable with my [23] sexual/dating history.  Complete double standards.  I've done nothing he hasn't, and he's been with a lot more people.  But he's always recognized that he's being irrational and that it's something he needs to get over.  But we don't know what to do to help him get over this, and whenever we talk about it it only makes it worse.  It's been a year and he insists he still needs more time to even know if it's possible.  At what point do I walk?", "summary": "BF has always been uncomfortable about my past.  It's been a year and it's not getting any better.  Will it?"}
{"id": "t3_2gm5ke", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24f] having trouble bringing up the status of my relationship with the older [32] guy I'm seeing", "post": "So. I've been seeing a guy now for a few months. I met him right as I was getting out of a messy relationship that really fucked with my head. But he's made me so happy since I've started seeing him and I can really see a future with him. But we haven't yet talked about where we see this going. We've both said we aren't sleeping with other people, but we haven't yet said whether or not we want to be in a relationship. I'm having trouble bringing up the subject. Mostly because my last relationship ended so badly and it makes me nervous to let someone else in. I'm also worried that our age difference might be too much for him because every once in a while he'll make a joke about how young I am. \n\nI know that being scared to have this conversation seems stupid and most of you will probably think that I shouldn't be with someone I can't have this conversation with. But I guess I just can't decide if having this talk after only a couple months is rushing into something or if I'm going to sound crazy. I guess I just need a pep talk or something. Any advice is greatly appreciated", "summary": "Seeing an older [32m] guy for a couple months. Nervous to have a conversation about where we stand. Pep talk or advice appreciated.."}
{"id": "t3_31lqvk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] with my girlfriend [30 F] of 1 1/2 years, found her online dating profile, not sure what to do", "post": "I've been seeing this girl for 1 1/2 years, mostly long distance.  Recently found her facebook and while digging around I found an online dating profile with pictures of her.  After confronting her on the phone and skype, she tearfully said her sister made the profile without her knowledge.  But most of the pictures on her profile is not on her FB and the description on the profile sounds uncannily like her.  Like the writing style is like hers.\n\nHonestly, I never thought of her as the type to cheat on me.  But when I read the profile, I didn't have any doubts it's her.  Also, why would her 26 year old sister, married with children, want to create a fake online dating profile with her older sister's photos?  I can't explain it and neither could she.\n\nNever thought this would happen (again) in my life.  You'd think by the time people hit their 30's this shit would stop.  Why do I feel like I'm still in high school.  Fucking relationships suck ass.\n\nNow I'm not sure what to do.  I think I should just dump her and move on.  Having a hard time believing she'd do this, but I'm also having a hard time believing her sister would do this.  I need some advice reddit.", "summary": "Found supposedly fake online dating profile of my girlfriend.  She claims her sister put it up.  WTF.  Need advice."}
{"id": "t3_44z0oo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my girlfriend [24 F] of 5 years, have different sleep patterns - says im selfish", "post": "I've been with my girlfriend for almost 5 years and we recently bought our own house and moved in at Christmas.\n\nI've always ran on about 6 - 7 hours sleep, and prior to moving in, I'd always do my own thing when I got home.  I'd play games, learn some code until I was tired which was usually until about half 12.  \n\nMy girlfriend is always tired and wakes up early for her job, she's usually up at 7 and out of the house by 8.  She goes to bed at 10:30 so gets about 8 - 9 hours sleep a night.\n\nI've been trying to get into this sleep pattern, but I just find myself lying awake at night or being shattered the next day from too much sleep.\n\nI'm wanting to spend some time playing some games, and with most people my age, the only time we get is later at night - hence the reason I was usually playing games from about 10 - 12:30.\n\nNow we're living together, she complains that I either wake her up because she's a light sleeper, and how it's unfair for me to go to bed later because I should be thinking about her.\n\nPersonally I think this is wrong to simply demand this, but she's as stubborn as they come, and trying to talk sense into her just results in an argument.  I've tried explaining the above, or using the fact that when she wakes up in the morning, her alarm wakes me up, as does her getting dressed etc so I end up waking up an hour earlier due to her.  \n\nI should add that I work from home in a stressful job, but she uses this as an excuse as to why I should respect her sleeping hours and go to bed at the same time (even if i lie awake for hours).  I can't go to bed later, I can't use my laptop in bed to code, yet she has to have the TV on to go to sleep to (I can't stand this)\n\nI don't really know how else to tackle it, as everything gets turned into me being the bad guy and its all about her", "summary": "GF & I have different sleep schedules.  She expects me to go to bed at the same time as her due her getting up for work, and me going to bed later wakes her up."}
{"id": "t3_3mpxie", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] broken up about break up with girl [21 F]", "post": "I have already posted about this girl previously but just for quick background, we have known each other a while, dated for about 4-5 months, although she has had feelings for about a year. A few days ago she ended things with me and I suppose I am writing this more to vent, since I was numb to the break up until today.\n\nFor a few weeks before I could tell she was pulling away. She said she felt pressured into being official, and was scared due to a very large amount of outside stress, mainly due to her grandmother being very sick in the hospital for months. About 2 weeks ago we had a large fight, where she was very iffy about making plans for a date and I was annoyed because she had been flakey about dates recently. We talked a few days ago and she said that she had intended to give it time and see where it went but after that fight she suddenly lost feelings.\n\nBeing honest, I am devastated. I had fallen hard for this girl and the idea that I had pressured her into things and caused her to lose feelings is a tough pill to swallow. That being said, I doubt there is much I can do to \"fix\" things and try again, and she is so guilty about hurting me I doubt she would even tell me if she did still have feelings or redeveloped them. Still, any advice, comments, words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Girl I had been seeing said she lost feelings suddenly and ended things. I am feeling pretty lost and hurt, looking for advice or at least to rant and blow off steam."}
{"id": "t3_1ljwp9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by letting my 7 year old sister crash her friend's go kart into his dad's porsche.", "post": "I'll start off by giving you a little background.  I am 16, and my little sister is 7.  She was bored and wanted to go hang out at her friend's house down the street.  So I took her there.\n\nWhen we got there, her friend insisted on showing me his new go kart. So I said sure.  We went to his garage, and he showed me his go kart.  I asked if I can try it out and he said sure. I rode it around for about a minute and then got off.\n\nThen my sister asked if she can try it. I was skeptical at first because she's never driven anything like this.  But then I thought, *\"It has four wheels. It's not like she's gonna flip it or anything.\"*\n\nSo I told her she can. I showed her all the controls. How to steer, how to go, and how to brake. Then I step away and let her go.\n\nShe then proceeded to drive straight into a Porsche. Her friend's dad's Porsche.  Everyone freaked out, and ran inside to tell him.  And to make matters worse, they exaggerated a lot and told him the scratch was ***huge*** and she was going ***super fast*** when she crashed into it.\n\nThe dad was super nice about it, but I felt guilty as fuck. I said sorry multiple times. And I told my sister to apologize but she never did.\n\nThen about 20 minutes later as we were leaving, I told my sister to go say thank you for all the snacks they gave her and for being so cool about everything.  But instead of saying thank you, she started crying because she didn't want to go. The crying then turned into screaming and yelling and calling me names.  I finally had to carry her out of there because she refused to leave.  I kept on apologizing as we were leaving.\n\nI've never felt so fucking stressed out and embarrassed in my entire life.", "summary": "My sister crashed her friend's go kart into his dad's Porsche, and didn't say sorry. Then as we were leaving, she started to cry and scream because she didn't want to go yet."}
{"id": "t3_qhum8", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "GF of 5 years probably moving away, wants me to go but I said no.", "post": "A little bit of history: I'm 23/m she's 22/f and we have been together on and off for 5-6 years now. This girl is my best friend and I will probably always love her no matter how things end up. She graduates from school in a few months and has this really great chance for a 1yr + internship in Boston, NY, or NJ (we currently live on the western part of the country) and may end up staying out of state beyond the 1yr if she finds a grad school she likes out there. Now the hard thing is that she wants me to move with her to where ever she ends up going and I flat out told her I wasn't comfortable with that **at all!** I don't even feel comfortable with moving in with her right now let alone leaving everything else behind to move across the country. I told her to go if she gets the opportunity because I'll be damned if I'm the thing to hold her back. The hard part about this is that we already tried the long distance thing at the beginning of her schooling 4 years ago and ended up breaking up for the first year that she was gone. She wants to go and would be willing to try the long distance thing again and keeps asking about my thoughts on doing LDR again. She also wants to try even though she seem hopeful it would work based on past experience and quite frankly I don't even want to try a LDR again (horrible shit). Every time she brings it up she basically leaves the decision on me about what we are going to do and I don't know what to do Reddit. Every time I think about it, something in me can't help but start counting down to the (final) end of our relationship even though I don't want it to end. Any advice? (sorry for the giant wall of text) and I will be happy to clarify anything if need be. Thanks in advance.", "summary": "Girlfriend is probably moving across the country for school/work, wants me to go but I'm not comfortable moving. Neither really wants a LDR so this could be the (unwanted) end of the relationship. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_2v7yod", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU and flooded my bathroom", "post": "This happened about 20 minutes ago.\n\nI was in the mood for a hot, foamy bath. I go into the bathroom, hop into the tub, add some bath salts (and no, I'm not craving for human flesh) and some of that thing that produces foam (I'm not English, sorry!) and lay on my back, eyes closed.\n\nI should mention by now that our drain plug is chipped and lets water leak from the tub into the drain, so I usually take it out and put a plastic bag. It worked like a charm. Until today.\n\nAfter 2-3 minutes, I hear bubbles in the secondary drain (the one on the floor made to prevent floods. Ironic, huh?) and realize that the water was at half the original level.\n\nNo biggie. I reach for the plastic bag to adjust it and realize that it'a gone. I look to the bathroom floor only to see it entirely flooded. The plastic bag was sucked into the drain and clogged it. By now, the tub was empty. I jumped out and ran to grab some towels. To my relief, the bag was flushed down and the water started going down the drain.\n\nBut I didn't finish bathing. And guess what? No hot water left. After a manly cold bath, I get out, dry myself and prepare for the worst. \n\nMy house has a pretty weird structure. It's made by two buildings. One hosts the bedrooms and living-room, and the other hosts the kitchen and bathroom. They are connected, but there is no door between. From one to the other is a 10 meter walk. And I had to walk slowly since the ground was frozen, and it was cold as fuck outside. \n\nNow you may be wondering why I bathed in cold water instead of showering tomorrow morning. It's because my overly-protective parents forbid me from bathing/showering immediately before going out to prevent me from catching a cold.", "summary": "Tried to seal bath tub drain with a plastic bag which got sucked in and flooded the bathroom. Had to take a cold bath and a walk through the yard."}
{"id": "t3_s88zh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, BT is trying to charge my family \u00a3140 because the phone+hub they have given to us has failed. it has never worked from the day we have had it, and we pay line rental fee's for the phone but can't use it.", "post": "BT provided us with a \"homehub\" (router) which has a built in phone. The phone has never worked, and yet we can only use that phone to get the 'free' calls that we pay for. Because it doesn't work it means we have to use a second phone, which means we receive very high charges.\n\nMy father called BT support up and asked them if they could repair it and, failing that, replace it, because the damage is nothing to do with us, and any and all filters on the phone have been checked and replaced, yet still nothing. They said \"we will repair the phone happily, just pay us \u00a3140 and we will send out an engineer\"\n\nObviously we don't want this, we would rather just have a new hub, i mean it has to be cheaper for both sides for them to just replace it? it must cost them what, \u00a340 to produce?\n\nanyway, down to the point, they aren't budging, is there anything anyone could suggest we do to make the robbing bastards give us what we pay (heavily) for?", "summary": "BT are robbing bastards, broken equipment, they want to charge us \u00a3140 to repair something that's their fault. How can we get them to fork the bill?"}
{"id": "t3_3alt1e", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trusting a fart.", "post": "This just happened. I don't write very well, so please excuse my grammar. \n\nWe'll start off with my morning. I wake up late for work. Had to be at work for 0730, woke up at 0710. I work for an ambulance service as an EMT and I am currently in paramedic school doing clinicals every other day I'm not working a 24 hour shifts on the boo boo bus. So I'm rushing around trying to get my uniform together when I fell a dart brewing. Ok seems innocent enough. No. It was a bubble of doom. I knew instantly as it was coming out that it was too late and I had just destroyed a nice fresh pair of boxers. So the boxers get thrown away and now I'm wasting even more time sitting on the toilet. My bowels are doing back flips and now I'm even more late for work. So I finish as fast I could then frantically find a new pair boxers and finish getting my shit together and get out the door for a 20 min drive to work. \n\nWhen I get to work I remembered I keep a bottle of pepto bismol in my box. Thinking it would help settle my stomachs and colon I decide to take some. Well that was possibly the worst idea I could of had st the time. Someone had decided to play a joke on me and put hot sauce in my medicine. Instant burning all the way down. My stomach is now doing front flips and back flips and side flips and any other flip you could possible image. Now I need to vomit. Made it in time to the bathroom luckily. That pepto was the only thing I had in my stomach and it felt like I was spewing hell fire. Now I like some spice here and there but this was hot hot. Not a flavor hot. So now I feel even worse and I just started my 24 hour shift. Yay.", "summary": "I shartted this morning and I drank a half pepto half hot sauce mix drink that came right back out."}
{"id": "t3_tgzuh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Drama with my BF's roommates", "post": "My boyfriend lives with four other guys, one of whom he shares a room, Max. A few days ago, we got into a heated argument that almost resulted in us breaking up. We didn't because most of the issues we have  are because of Max, a 22 year old stoner who spends the majority of his day playing video games. Max does not have a job, go to class, and lives off of his parents money, most of which goes to weed and eating out. Because of Max's influence, my boyfriend has started gaming and smoking more. At Max's request, I've stopped coming over as much and doing certain things that bother him, such as coming in from the backdoor, knocking on the window to have someone unlock the door, bringing over extra changes of clothes, etc. All of these requests are reasonable enough but they have brought stress onto my relationship nonetheless. Other than that, we get along OK.\n\nWhile my boyfriend and I were fighting, I called Max \"a useless piece of shit.\" It was unnecessary and I certainly regret it, but it was honest. However, though we were outside, one of my boyfriend's other roommates overheard when he came to smoke a cigarette and told Max what I said. My boyfriend isn't asking me to apologize to Max, but obviously that's what he would like me to do.\n\nSo here's my issue: I don't mind apologizing to Max but I feel like the informant roommate shouldn't have said anything to Max in the first place. My words weren't meant for other people and the other roommate knows that Max and I get along for the most part. Do I have a right to be angry at the other roommate?", "summary": "I called my boyfriend's roommate \"a lazy piece of shit\" and was overheard by someone else, who promptly passed the word. I'll apologize, but I feel like I shouldn't have had to in the first place."}
{"id": "t3_2f6n4z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (22 M) like everything about this woman (23 F) but her weight.", "post": "Backstory: I'm originally from Maryland, but I just came back from doing a summer internship in Boston. In late July, I met this woman from OKC.. we were sexting pics within a couple days of first contact and at first I thought all this was going to be was a hookup because of the way things started. When I first saw her in real life she ended up being a lot bigger than I anticipated and I quickly noted that she was not my ideal body type but I still enjoyed the sex.\n\nAfter sex, we just laid on my bed and talked for about 3-4 hours. We found that we had a lot in common and I realized that I actually enjoyed her company. She even bought me Chipotle afterwards. We decided we wanted to keep seeing each other, even though we both knew that I had to go back home to Maryland soon to finish up my last year of school. \n\nFast forward to last week (Aug 24), she ends up coming down to visit me for the week at my parents' place in Maryland (where I'm staying for the next 2 semesters). She's met my parents and sister.\n\nBasically, I find that I really enjoy her company, her personality, the way she supports me in my hobbies/aspirations.. everything except her body type. We have TONS of sex (2-3 times a day) but one time I couldn't finish and she asked if I thought she was unattractive and honestly I don't really find her body attractive but I think she has a gorgeous face. Of course I didn't tell her this I just said that I think she is beautiful. \n\nI like everything about this woman except her weight. She is about 5'6 and 155 and I am that same weight but I am 5'9. Sometimes I feel like I'm settling in the looks department (is this shallow?) because up until this point in my life I've only dated skinny/athletic women. Am I just scared about what my friends will think about her weight? \n\nI don't want to just cut her off since I really do like her but her weight bothers me slightly. What should I do?", "summary": "I like everything about this girl except her weight and I am a little insecure about what my friends may think of her."}
{"id": "t3_v8iax", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Looking for a Good Cat Feeder/Toy", "post": "Hey everyone!  I need some help.  Me and my girlfriend have two cats who have gotten a little food obsessed.  They were both kinda fat at one point so we, with the advice of our vet, put them on a diet of organic wet food (we use Prowl, the dehydrated stuff that you add water to).\n\nWell, they're getting a little obnoxious now.  We used to keep their food on top of the fridge, but once they went on a diet they figured out how to climb up on top of the fridge, knocked the box over and ate like a half a box of dehydrated cat food.  So, we moved it to our laundry room, on top of the washer/dryer combo.  If we ever left the door cracked they were up there again, tearing into the box.  The final straw came this weekend when we had left the door closed but they got it anyway!  How you ask?  Well we live in a loft, and they actually climbed on top of the bathroom (there's like four feet between the bathroom ceiling and the loft ceiling) found their way in the laundry room through the roof of the closet and tore open the box of food.\n\nI think partly they need something to do!  We both work a lot and I take care of my grandma on the weekends so they're home alone a lot.  I want one of those toys that you can put treats in and they have to play with it to get them out.  I've tried Kong stuff, and while they love to play with the \"snowman ball\" they don't seem interested in/able to get out food I put in it (it came with some kind of salmon paste).  I need a good toy that will let a little food out at a time to keep their attention away from raiding the food box and keep them entertained while we're gone.  Anyone have something that works well for them?\n\nThanks in advance reddit!  :)", "summary": "Need a good toy that lets out cat treats slowly to keep cats entertained and stop them from obsessivly trying to get into the box their food comes in."}
{"id": "t3_4z9ro2", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "having intense anxiety about possibly moving out, need advice", "post": "Hello all,\n\nSo first of all thank you for reading this, now let's get into the meat of my dilemma\n\nI'm currently going to college and my parents have graciously allowed me to live in their home while I'm going to college so I can save the maximum amount of money possible, for which I am very grateful. \n\nMy father lost is Job about six months ago and has been vigorously looking for a new one. He recently has had two opportunities for employment come up. the problem is that one is in the middle of nowhere in the state we live in. They have invited me to go with them to which I have declined; I would like to stay in my current city and finish my degree. \n\nmy anxiety has been running haywire.\n\nlogically I make enough money to live with a roommate, pay all of my bills, have extra fun money, and STILL save money. \n\nbut my mind has been wracking itself with self deprecating thoughts and its honestly annoying. I was in the army and I managed just fine, so its not like I haven't been on my own before. I really don't know where this is coming from.  \n\nI'll honestly be fine no what. I would honestly enjoy the option where my parents stay and I keep wracking up savings but I'm also fine with the other option as well, but my mind keeps telling me otherwise.\n\nso I need your advice. How do I quell these thoughts of doom?", "summary": "Parents may be moving, I'm staying here to finish school, have enough money to live with roommate but my mind is very anxious and fears doom. how do I quell these thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_4y1hn1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [35f] ex [34m] is physically abusing his girlfriend [30somethingF]. Should I talk to her?", "post": "My ex and I were together for six years, which culminated with him holding a gun to my head threatening to murder me while he was under the influence of a drug (MXE). He has a lot of mental health problems and the drug abuse certainly does not help. \n\nSince the end of our relationship three+ years ago, he's been in a relationship with one woman and told me that he had gotten clean, which I've since learned is a lie. We have very little contact. Last weekend a mutual friend was with the ex and his gf and he was intoxicated and choked his gf in front of other people. The gf said it's happened a number of times. The next morning when everyone was sober, the gf tried to brush it off and act like everything was fine. She lives with him with her two young children. He still has guns. I'm absolutely terrified for her. \n\nOn one hand, it isn't any of my business. My life changed substantially for the better after getting out of the relationship with my ex and I don't want to involve myself in any drama. I dropped him and everyone associated with him (other than this one mutual friend) back then because of how messed up I was after the gun incident. On the other, I feel like I should tell her about what happened to me so that she knows exactly who she's dealing with (although she may already know). His behavior is clearly escalating, he has guns, and he's still abusing this drug. My current boyfriend, whose opinion I value immensely, says that I should leave it be, but he is obviously biased.\n\nI can't look at this situation objectively. What, if anything, should I do?", "summary": "Ex is abusing his current gf and I want to warn her about him holding a gun to my head and threatening to murder me."}
{"id": "t3_3v3nr2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] new at dating [30sM], when to start going dutch?", "post": "Need some perspective! \n\nI've been in 2 long-term relationships since high school, so I've never really done the adult dating thing. I recently got out of my last one in the summer, and started casually dating in the fall. I've been having a lot of fun going on dates. For a while it was a string of first-dates and nothing serious, but recently I've been seeing a guy for a month and it's been going really well.\n\nI enjoy spending time with him including going for dinners as we both are foodies, cooking dinner at his place, going out to the bar with his friends, that kind of thing. This past weekend he was acting off-standish and today he said that it bothered him that I rarely offered to pay. I mean I've paid for coffees and movie tickets and a few ones offs but when I thought about, I never did the whole fumbling-with-my-wallet thing very much. He would usually pick it up, but didn't say much after that. We talked it over and I told him of course I would pay for my share from now on. I wasn't even aware of it - I guess in my eyes, we weren't exclusive and if he wanted me to pick up my tab, he would have asked for separate bills or something to the tune of, \"Let's split it.\" I would have been more than happy to - I'm not going out with him for the free ride.\n\nI wanted to get some perspective from outsiders: is there a timeline when the girl should start paying? Is it right away, or after a month? Or totally depends on the guy?", "summary": "Dating n00b - didn't know that I was coming off as ... a non-paying dating mate. Is there an expectation or timeline for when to start splitting?"}
{"id": "t3_104ss0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My roommate is blackmailing my girlfriend and I over stupid shit. We've decided we're not going to take it; any ideas for payback.", "post": "Throwaway account just in case.\n\nShort story and context:\n\nGirlfriend is here on a working holiday visa that was recently renewed. To renew said visa we had to call in a favor from a friend. Girlfriend being the trusting type she is told people she was close to including roommate (who up until recently was our friend) about the details of this process.\n\nSituation in the house has been gradually deteriorating for a number of weeks due to silly reasons. Finally we decided to leave and look for our own place. Girlfriends birthday is coming up soon and I decided id like to throw a birthday party for her before leaving. Roommate was totally opposed to the situation, saying there was no day over the next 2 weeks this would be permissible because he had work and other plans blah blah blah. Situation escalated when he started aggressively demanding his way and I called him a tyrant. \n\nHe threatened that if we even so much as have a single person over without his permission he'll go to immigration and try have her deported.\n\nUnfortunately he's a bitter enough prick that I think this is a credible threat. My situation now is this: we have 2 weeks left till we move out, how can I fuck with him as much as possible and make him pay for being a vindictive asshole without him actually carrying out his threat.", "summary": "roommate threatened to have girlfriend possibly deported if we have anyone over to celebrate her birthday. 2 weeks left till we leave, need ways to fuck with him"}
{"id": "t3_u2f7m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, a girl with a fake facebook identity is seducing unknown people on facebook for no reason. What should I do?", "post": "So I was added as a friend on Facebook by a girl who looked very cute, but I didn't know her. I asked how she knew me, and she said she had made a mistake, and mid apology threw in, \"you look cute.\" Basically we texted back and forth for a few days, and she was extremely, extremely flirty. My suspicious were halted when she would talk to me for 3-4 hours a night on the phone and text me virtually all day. \n\nI was suspicious, but she had a few hundred friends, a twitter account with a bunch of followers that tweeted at her, etc. It seemed legit, but I noticed one too many red flags.\n\nLong story short, I got suspicious enough I did a few reverse image searches on Google, and sure enough she is using a fake name, has real pictures, but fake info, and has added enough friends to look legitimate. This is truly a work of art. She claimed to live about 45 minutes from me, go to my University, work in a city about an hour away, and even knew a bunch of stuff about our supposed mutual church, etc. Now I realize she lives in Texas, is in a sorority, and it's all lies.", "summary": "I have her the phone number and real information of a fake girl who apparently goes way out of her way to lead people on and seduce them. What should I do? Subscribe her to cat facts?"}
{"id": "t3_2s78mi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex (F21) just broke up with me (M23) because she needed to find herself. But I still want her - how do I eventually get her back?", "post": "So I (M23) had been dating her (F21) for two years. Recently, she had become immature and rude to me. She then went back to the US for Christmas break and days before she returned, she said she had to tell me something. She got back and said she went to a party, got black out drunk and was taken advantage of. I believe my ex 100%, but I feel this was just something extra she did to push her over the edge, to give her that excuse to say what she ultimately wanted which was to break up with me. Her rudeness and immaturity that had \"developed\" wasn't enough to push me away so that I would do the break up, so I guess I interpret this event of her getting taken advantage of as her excuse so that she could do it. When she told me this, I realised she was PARTLY the victim here and was turning to forgive her. But then I asked her if she still loved me and she said she didn't know. She said her views on what love were had changed, she didn't think it existed anymore and she felt she had completely changed. She said she had to find herself, go travelling, see the world and get some perspective. She comes from a very messed up family and suffers with anxiety issues so I understand that she needs to figure that out before she can be with someone. But I am not just losing my girlfriend, I am losing my best friend too and I do not want to lose both. I would love for her to come back to me as my girlfriend but obviously not until she has found herself. Can I still be friends with her while she tries to find herself? I don't want to completely lose her. If anyone has any like 5 steps plans or strategies, please, I would really appreciate it. And also, for those who want to call me a pussy or are just going to insult me, please don't, I'm having a hard enough time as it is, and please just constructive advice. Thank you.", "summary": "How do I get my ex-girlfriend back who needs to find herself? Can I still have her in my life as a friend while she finds herself? Constructive, strategic advice only please."}
{"id": "t3_339oww", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Friend wants me to pitch in money for gift", "post": "I belong to a friend group and when one of our friends found out her mom's cancer was no longer being helped by chemo and her condition was terminal apparently someone decided we'd send an edible arrangement. Don't get me wrong I think it was a nice gesture but we're poor college students and it was going to involve each of us pitching in $12. In our group chat another girl and I said it was too much and maybe we could find something else. That was the last I heard of it until our friend who left sent a message thanking all of us for the EA. That was in February and I've forgotten about it until now; the girl \"in charge\" just texted and asked me to pay her the $12 for the EA. \n\nI don't want to be an ass but I didn't agree to paying for it and yet I'm still expected to. I sent our friend something little on my own thinking I wasn't included in the fruit. I know $12 doesn't seem like much but I'm pretty broke plus honestly I don't really think it's fair I have to pay. the girl who asked for the money and I aren't really close so I don't know how to handle this.", "summary": "My friends pitched in to send our friend an Edible Arrangement, I didn't agree to it but I'm still expected to pay; should I or can I tell her no?"}
{"id": "t3_46oz01", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So my girlfriend (29F) broke up with me (29M) about 6 weeks ago. She keeps giving me mixed signals about getting back together, what should I do?", "post": "So she decided we needed some time and space from me on the weekend I was planning to propose (she didn't know about my plans), we got to talking about our relationship and some issues that had been swept under the rug for a while finally came to light on both our ends. After 2 weeks of space and time I started reaching out to try and work things out, she said she needed more time I said we should work on things together, after a bit of a discussion she decided if I can't give her the time and space then it's over and broke up with me. It's been a total of 6 weeks including the time a day space. We've stayed in contact the whole time and some days she seems to be hinting at getting back together and other days she's very standoffish and says we'll never get back together, just give up hope. With all the back and forth, I heard she was dating someone now so I asked and she said she's not, she's just friends with a guy but they're talking a lot and getting to know each other but that's it. Then the next day she's telling me how much she loves me and got upset that I deleted our pics off social media (yet she had unfriended me weeks ago). She says she wants to keep a friendship with me but I told her I can't, not with how in love I still am and specially not if she's talking to someone else because I think it's BS she won't try to fix things with me, but is willing to give someone else her time and attention. I love her, more than I've ever loved any woman before, she's the first and only girl I've ever bought an engagement ring for. My family adores her, my kids have become attached to her and call her mommy, her son has done the same with me and calls me dad. I just don't know what to do now, I'm tired of feeling depressed and being on this emotional Rollercoaster of getting my hopes up one day, and shooting me down the next. What do you guys suggest I do?", "summary": "GF and I have been separated for 6 weeks, I want her back bad, she keeps giving mixed signals. Give up or continue pursuing?"}
{"id": "t3_1ivdue", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M/] got cheated on by my girlfriend of 2 years [18/F]. We broke up.", "post": "I'm a mess. She cheated on me with someone she met in Spain at a festival. I absolutely adore this girl. I've known her for about 7/8 years, and there's always been something between us. We properly got together 2 years ago, and it was the happiest I've ever been.\n\nShe's my best friend, the person who I could tell everything to. I don't have anyone else to talk to and now I'm just falling apart. She told me yesterday and I didn't sleep at all last night. The pain is unlike anything I've ever felt, and the only person who I could possible talk about it with was her. I feel more lonely now then I can ever remember.\n\nWe were supposed to be going on holiday next week together, that's out the window now. It was with my family and I have to tell them today. My family adored her.\n\nI'm just at a loss right now. I never would've suspected she would do something like this. I am so angry at her but at the same time I want to stay with her with all of my being. I don't have anyone else to talk to.\n\nShe's been my life for 2 years, and now in an instant she's gone. I just feel empty and this is the most emotional pain I've ever felt in my life. I don't know what to do, who to talk to or where to go. Please help.", "summary": "Girlfriend of 2 years cheated on me. Most pain I have ever felt. She was my best friend and I don't have anyone else. I don't know what to do"}
{"id": "t3_f90z2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What do you programmers / engineers think of your project managers?", "post": "Hey all,\n\nI wanted to start a legitimate conversation about how coders view project managers and why they have those views. I am coming to the end of my senior year and I begin grad school in August where my focus will be in project management within the information technology realm. \n\nI myself have some background in coding (Java, Javascript, C, C#, VB .NET, some HTML / ASP .NET, SQL / MySQL) but not enough interest, drive, or skill to go out and do what you all do. I feel I have always been more of a people driven worker, and my passion for technology has helped me to decide to stay involved with it; this is why I landed in the world of Project Management. However, it disturbs me to see how many members of project teams despise their managers. \n\nI am asking you all this because I am finally able to start putting work in to really accelerate my learning in this sector, and one of the things I strongly believe in is getting information from the source. So I'm ask you all now;\n\nWhat do you think of your P.M.'s? Why do you think it? What would you suggest to make them better? \n\nI'm doing this so  when my time comes, I can be the best manager possible, so please no flaming.", "summary": "Going into project management. Want to know what software devs. think of their PMs, why, and what they suggest to improve; this will in turn help me be a better PM later in life."}
{"id": "t3_10ju7w", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "OK PEOPLE LISTEN UP! What do you believe Beauty to be? How do you define Beauty?", "post": "Ok people listen up! I am doing a survey about what people perceive beauty to be. So here's the bottom line post a discussion so that I may reap the benefits and generate a discussion. \n\nnext, you either PM me or comment. If you can send me a picture/ preferably send me a picture of what you believe beauty to be. anonymously or not, upload a photo or not, do what you wish, as long as as it relates to this question: What do you think beauty is? Maybe it is a little much to ask but I would like to have honest answers. If you don't want to be honest that's fine, I like funny shit. \n\nHere is the kicker, I want you to define what beauty is to you. I don't mean what you think is beautiful but rather what you perceive to be the definition of beauty pertaining specifically to your own life. Please post pictures as that is the main purpose aside from the notion of generating discussion. \n\nyou can also submit your photos and videos to the tumblr survey. Although I know how a lot of you feel about tumblr. For those interested it's as follows:", "summary": "?: What the fuck do you think beauty is huh? Tell me about it, no! better yet, show me! fucking show me what you think beauty is. "}
{"id": "t3_rkp81", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "Why did I not come here before?", "post": "I was referred here during finals week last semester, but I never actually got around to looking at this sub until today. Seeing all of the posts, I can't help but feel awe and shame. Why do I take each day for granted and not strive for greatness like you do? I used to think myself a perfectionist because I force myself to be discouraged when I am not perfect, but that isn't the point of having the goal of perfection. The point is to keep moving, to welcome the defeat and criticism and just move forward and up. That's why I was reminded of [this,] and I just wanted to thank you all. My rugby club is in the playoffs now, and seeing all of these posts reminded me of what I need to be doing to improve myself and my skills.", "summary": "You guys are as awesome as anyone can get, and you reminded me of how I need to be again. Thank you"}
{"id": "t3_n2w7m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What the hell can I do?", "post": "I teach art lessons to underprivileged youths at a nearby elementary school through an organization at my university. After only ever teaching in middle/upper class areas, working with these kids has been a very eye-opening experience. I'll cut to the chase though... Today was my last day working with this particular class of kids, and one table started talking about when they were afraid of their parents. Two girls admitted that their parents regularly belted them, with one also saying her dad whipped her with metal wire, too, and the other saying her dad pounded her hand with a brick. When I tried to tell them that it was wrong for their parents to hurt them and told them it's illegal, they disagreed and thought it wasn't illegal. Yet another started crying when she got a somewhat poor progress report she had to take home for her parents to sign, saying her dad was going to beat her like he usually did. A different girl also told me that her mom calls her a \"fat bitch\" and that her dad was deported and went to jail after trying to kill her mother.\n\nI asked the graduate student who serves as supervisor of the other undergraduate mentors like me what, if anything, I should do. Her exact words were, \"If you didn't see bruises, you can't say shit.\" In a sad way I agree, and I realize I also have no proof that these kids are telling the truth, although they seemed serious. But thinking about some man taking a brick to a 9 year-old girl just makes me sick.\nSo I thought I'd ask you, Reddit. What can or should I do? I need some peace of mind.\n\nSome background notes: I am a 20 year-old white female in California. My kids are 5th graders, primarily Hispanic, and low income. I am not an official teacher or counselor-- just a college volunteer mentor.", "summary": "Have heard MULTIPLE testaments from my 5th grade mentees that their parents abuse them. What can I realistically do? (that won't just be a bunch of useless paperwork that angers the parents more)"}
{"id": "t3_15gzyp", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I've lied to all of my friends and built a false image of myself for anyone I have ever met.", "post": "I don't know when it started. I don't know why it started. Most people put on masks or armor when dealing with others. I have so many mask and so many sets of armor. I can't pretend to be a real person anymore. I can't pretend that people know and understand me anymore.\n\nLet me try and give you some background.\n\nI am an 18 year old senior that had a chance to go to MIT full ride. I'm reasonable intelligent, 5;10, lithe wiry musculature, 140 lbs. I play sports, I did martial arts, I took advanced placement classes and I was friends with everyone. I did not date because I kept telling myself there was no one I really liked. That is what helped bring this all to a head.\n\nIt's not that there wasn't a girl that I liked enough to date, it's that there wasn't a single person around me who I could open up to. Who I could explain that I was a fake. That I lied about my childhood to everyone. That I lied about my adolescence to everyone. I've had plenty of friends, if you can call them that. I've had flings with women, if you can call them flings. I've been the life of the party and the main actor in a spotlight.\n\nI've never been me.\n\nMoving on now to the internet, I've been browsing for about eight years now. I was the generic kiddo on the internet for the first four. I quickly grew tired and developed yet another false identity.\n\nI was a 16 year old Asian girl that went to my school for years. Some of my friends still don't know mostly because we haven't talked in a while. I took on a maternal role for a forum, quickly becoming a therapist in a sense. People would come to me and ask me for life advice and other nonsense and I would lie to them about who and what I was and give them their idiotic advice. Some would come back with success stories. Others would come back for more advice.\n\nI'm really just rambling now and have no clue where i wanted to take this.", "summary": "I'm a habitual liar and have never had a real personality. I mold myself to what others want and need and have never truly been myself."}
{"id": "t3_30apnl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] with my parents [50s M/F]. Father is emotionally abusive to my mother-questions", "post": "Sorry for wall of text.\n\nThis is an issue that has been ongoing for most of my life. My father, while incredibly successful and a great provider, has always been emotionally abusive to my mother. Luckily it has never turned physical (AFAIK), but whenever I visit home, I hear my father scream at and berate my mother for every little thing. For example, my father is an incredibly reckless driver. Whenever my mother comments on something he did that was unsafe, it turns into 2 hours of him screaming at her for constantly criticizing him. He also screams at me and my siblings about mundane things e.g. not cleaning something properly, dropping something, not using utensils correctly (?? who knows).\n\nI'm at a loss at what to do. I absolutely adore my mother and my father is enjoyable to be around when he is not angry, but I'm tired of seeing her screamed at by him. Whenever I bring up this issue, she always tells me that he is working on his temper and has other good qualities. However, my mother consistently tells me that he wasn't like this when she married him and if she had known how he would turn out, she wouldn't have.\n\nI've already told her that when I have children I will be extremely hesitant to leave them alone with my parents. Their relationship has affected my own views on relationships greatly. Beyond that, I'm not sure what I can do. Cut off all contact until she leaves him? Just continue to ignore it for the rest of my life? I have no idea what the protocol is for situations like this.\n\nAny help would be greatly, greatly appreciated. I'm tired of being a passive bystander.\n\nSummary of what he does: demeans her opinions and beliefs, always believes he is right, yells constantly, doesn't care about feelings, constantly makes threats.", "summary": "My father is emotionally abusive to my mother, with a ridiculous temper. She won't leave him. Advice on what to do as their child."}
{"id": "t3_2un1wr", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by falling in love with a lesbian", "post": "This happened last summer at UConn. I live in Connecticut.\n\nMy bestfriend has a girlfriend, who has an apartment at UConn. I like to drink and got really drunk walking around after we tried to sneak into a bar without paying the upfront tab.\n\nWe tried to get in through the kitchen. It smelt like buffalo wings, I led the way.\n\nNon-sequitur. \n\nWe got kicked out almost immediately. Being my drunk self, I lost my friends and made new friends, which I believe were frat boys. \n\nDrunk dancing like the left shark in the Super Bowl and started talking to hot black girls. They say they have a lesbian friend. Drunk JJ only hears Barney Stinson(I love HIMYM) say \"Make a lesbian straight. Legen-dary.\" \n\nMeet lesbian friend, hook up and dance, fall in drunken love with a girl who is cool. For the first time in my life, my hook up meant something. We talked and I actually liked this girl. \n\nFast forward 30 minutes later to a random dorm. She's hooking up with another random dude. And another dude. \n\nShe hooked up with 3 other dudes after me. I don't think she was a lesbian. \n\nDrunk JJ doesn't care. She jumps on my lap and starts kissing me again after these other dudes. I liked it till I get that I'm being played.\n\nMy heart was broken until I realized there's a lot of lesbians I can turn straight. \n\nAfter leaving this random dorm, I got attacked by a deer. A deer in the middle of UConn's campus jumped me. I ran away and lived to tell this story to reddit.\n\nI was so lost and drunk my best friends girlfriend had to find me. In the meantime, I ran into a skunk who ran away from me. I believe it was because of the fake lesbian smell.", "summary": "got drunk. Hooked up with a \"lesbian.\" Lesbian kissed other guys and ditched me. Got jumped by a deer."}
{"id": "t3_1xhqet", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with a girl [16 F] who I don't know how to let down.", "post": "There is a backstory behind this so let me give it to everyone straight. I'm 17 M never dated anyone before. I have made posts prior to this one based around my issues with being able to date.\n\nMy biggest issue is that once a girl peeks my interest I pursue her until she develops the same feelings. Once I understand she is interested too I sort of back off. A friend of mine called me a \"chaser\" which is what I feel I am.\n\nNow I have this girl that I know, really sweet, really smart, talented, the whole thing. I found recently she has feelings for me and we talked a bit about it after I mentioned I was aware of them. \n\nWhen we talked I gave her the impression that I wanted to date her and that we should talk in person and hang out a big more to be dating. The only issue is my gut AGAIN like always is telling me I'm not interested even though I really want to be, I'm just not.", "summary": "I don't know how to let this girl down after already giving her the impression I wanted to date her. I feel absolutely terrible about it."}
{"id": "t3_4p6ad4", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Petty pool day destruction", "post": "So yesterday my girlfriend and I were at a public pool trying to relax a little bit and maybe catch up on some reading. Unfortunately it started raining so we took shelter under a little poolside gondola that fitted two people. The two of us were sitting and talking and having a nice time when a tennis ball bounced over to us. I noticed a group of about five boys around the age of 12 looking at me so I assumed they had accidentally overthrown it and rolled the ball back to them. \n\nTwo minutes passed and another ball flies up to me. Again I rolled it back. After the third ball I knew something was up and I started to watch as the boys would wait until we weren't looking and throw a ball at us and then run up and retrieve it. After multiple throws, one of the balls flew up and smacked my girlfriend right in the chest. I threw all of the tennis balls I collected over the fence and glared at the laughing kids. \n\nThe lifeguard walked up to us with a smile and told us to let her know if they threw another ball because she would love to kick them out. She also mentioned that she had berated the kids. \n\nTwo of the kids came up and gave us a meek apology but my petty revenge was already plotted. The kids had not thrown a ball after the lifeguard's talk but on our way out we stopped by her stand and told her how they threw more balls at us. My girlfriend and I watched triumphantly as their pool day came to a sudden close.", "summary": "a bunch of kids keep throwing tennis balls at me so I get them all kicked out of the pool even after they stop."}
{"id": "t3_267rqb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure if this is the right place. My [30m] SO [28f] doesn't think she's pretty.", "post": "I recently saw a commercial on TV for Dove soap. In the commercial a statistic came on the screen that stated, \"9 out of 10 women do not think they are beautiful\"\n\nMy gf [28f] falls into the 9 out of 10 women who think that. \n\nShe is blonde, blue eyes and petite. Has amazing curves in all the right places. Big breasts and a great ass. She exercises three times a week. Loves to dirt bike and shoot guns!  (I think her personality is just as beautiful as her body)\n\nWhen we walk down the street,  almost every guy we walk past checks her out. She doesn't notice this. My guy friends have all let me know I'm pretty lucky to have found a girl as good looking as her. Her female friends are jealous of her body. Her bi friend has even expressed interest in having sex with her!\n\nWhat I'm getting at here is that she is clearly beautiful to everyone but herself. :(\n\nShe recently has expressed the desire to get botox done on her forehead and between her eyebrows. Preventive measure she'll tell me. \n\nI don't disagree or think it a bad idea. I just feel like she's doing it for the wrong reason. That reason being that she feels like she's not pretty. \n\nShe had a breast reduction in the last year. And recently started getting her eyelashes extended. I think this is relevant. \n\nWhat can I do? I tell her all the time she's beautiful. I'll send random texts, leave notes in her lunch, flowers. Everything I can to get her to accept she's pretty. \n\nI want her to feel pretty before she needs to change her entire body.", "summary": "my girlfriend doesn't think she's beautiful. She is to everyone but herself. How can I help her see herself the way everyone else does?"}
{"id": "t3_334ntb", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Should I be concerned about my friend's one time use of MDMA?", "post": "So I've always had the \"traditional\" view on drugs I.e. all drugs are bad etc. When I met my friend, who smokes weed, I've attempted to open my mind somewhat about drugs. I don't have a problem with her smoking weed in fact I've tried it with her a few times.  \nHowever, last night she told me that a few weeks ago she and a couple of friends did MDMA. I'm not sure how I feel about this. Because of my upbringing, I always thought MDMA will fuck you over big style, but after I did some research I felt a little better. I'm still uneasy though. She did say \"I probably wouldn't want to do it again, it was fun and all but ehh\"  \nAm I right to be concerned that she's going to have no qualms about trying even harder stuff I.e heroin, crack, meth?  \nThere's a certain uneasiness I feel in addition, which I can't quite pin down, I think it stems to the fact that my wonderful, awesome friend is trying things I'd never considered her doing, and that opens a new side to her I've never seen before. But thats my problem, not hers.", "summary": "Friend tried MDMA, said she liked it but probably won't do it again. I'm still concerned that she may do it again too soon, do other things which will fuck her up and seriously harm herself one day."}
{"id": "t3_2wge9r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my gf [19 F] of 6 months, communicate too much?", "post": "we've been speaking to eachother practically every day, atleast every few hours for the last 6 months and this morning she just started ignoring me? i see her active on social media yet she doesnt respond to anything i say, which is weird. but im starting to realize just how much we communicate so maybe this is healthy? \n\ni dont think ive ever really been in a \"healthy\" relationship before, my last gf of a year cheated on me the one and only night we decided to go off to separate parties in a year long relationship, and we communicated daily. so should i say something, or... am i being too clingy?", "summary": "is texting eachother every few hours unhealthy? we haven't spoken in 12+ hours and im feeling antsy and paranoid... am i being too clingy/psychotic?"}
{"id": "t3_2c0tmr", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting high and petting my dog", "post": "Me and my brother got high this morning and decided to plug in the ole gamecube to the tv, so we go to our garage to find it. We find it and we decide to take it upstairs. \n\n(We have some stairs that lead from the house into the garage, and we did not realize our dog followed us down the stairs to the garage.)\n\nAnyways I tell my brother I will carry her up the stairs and he can keep taking the gamecube to the room.\n\n(I got a big golden retriever dog thats pretty old so she doesn't like to climb up stairs, shes around 80 pounds or something like that)\n\nAnyways as I go to pick her up, and me being high as fuck still thought she was very soft. (I was also shirtless so it felt really good)\n\nSo I start rubbing against her and hugging her and all of a sudden my garage door opens up and three construction workers were staring at me, shirtless, in the middle of a garage, rubbing against my dog.\n\n(apparently there was some work being done today I forgot about)\n\nThey just started in awe for a little bit then one of them was like \"well give you a few more mins\" and they walked away for a bit, two of them looking confused as fuck and one of them chuckling...", "summary": "I was shirtless rubbing against my dog in my garage and 3 construction workers opened the garage and thought i was probably into some bestiality"}
{"id": "t3_2nc3g6", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Hotel room next door won't turn down their TV...", "post": "I moved into a super crappy extended stay hotel for a week because my apartment lease ran up on friday and I can't move into my new place until Wednesday. Horrible management, ghetto furniture, weird smell, half working heater, but whatever I'm a single guy right? Suck it up, save a few bucks by staying in a cheapo place.\nWe'll along with all that are paper thin walls and a horrible neighbor that moved in yesterday. They have a dog that barked all day yestersay and when they finally got home they turned their TV volume way up. I went and knocked on their door twice asking to turn it down with no result. Didn't get to sleep until 1 when they finally turned it off.\n\nCut to today, I've had 3 more hours of dog barking until they got home and then dancing with the stars cranked way up followed by what I think is Nancy Grace coverage of Furgeson and they won't even answer the door this time. I'm done at this point so I hooked up my laptop, maxed the TV and hit play on a 30 minute Nyan Cat loop. I'm ready to fight dirty. Up next is heavy metal from my high school days. \n\nMuted the TV at the end of typing this, I've won! They turned it down!", "summary": "hotel room next door are jerks and won't turn down tv or quiet their dog, 30 minutes of Nyan Cat full volume. Now quiet tv and quiet dog."}
{"id": "t3_s5qxp", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Studying in Madrid this July, have a free week after. What should I do?", "post": "Basically, as the title says, I'll be studying in Madrid this coming July through a program with my (American) university. \n\nI have a free week after and am trying to figure out how I would best spend it. I realize it's not a lot of time, but I'd like to hear what you would do if you had an extra week.\n\nI'll probably have seen enough of Spain (and a little bit of Portugal, probably) to be happy, so I'm thinking of traveling elsewhere in Europe. However, I'm a Brazilian citizen, which probably doesn't affect much, but it's worth considering if I have to cross borders. \n\nI don't expect to go backpacking/hiking/scuba-diving or anything like that in such a short amount of time, but I'd be very happy being a \"fish out of water.\" I love beaches and mountains, really any scenery or cities would be cool with me. \n\nBasically, this would just be a good way for me to whet my appetite with a little bit of Europe. Probably I have enough time to explore maybe two cities or so counting travel, maybe see a good museum or two and eat some interesting food. \n\nIf you have suggestions (anybody know anything about getting into the Paris tunnels?) about any thing that I just **need** to see/visit/eat/dance or something, I'd love to hear it. Also, my birthday falls during this free week, and I don't know if I'll have any companions with me as of yet, but anything I could do to celebrate my birthday would be cool as well.", "summary": "Have a free week July 28-Aug 4, will have been studying in Spain, want to see cool/interesting stuff and celebrate my birthday."}
{"id": "t3_2zqwvb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] FWB [23 M] secretly took screenshots of my nudes. I want them deleted, he said no. What do I do?", "post": "Throwaway account. I have never posted on Reddit ever so please be gentle on the formatting! I am trying my best.\n\nI met Nick* on Tinder. I was just checking it out for fun, my best friend loved and used it etc. I met up with him and we just hung out. He's a nice guy and I just had broken up with my ex. So we became friends with benefits.\n\nSince I left that summer for college, we just sext a lot. And often it was just texting but sometimes he would ask me for some pictures and I was naive  so I thought a 3 second picture on snapchat should get the job done and keep me safe.\n\nThree months into this; snapchat notified me with the little triangle symbol that he had screenshoted it. And I **FLIPPED OUT**. I told him it made me uncomfortable and so the next time we met up, I had him deleted them off his computer. And I thought he understood that I didn't like the fact that he saved the pictures. He said he would stop. \n\nRecently, we met up and I asked him if he saved any of the pictures. And he said that he didn't. However, I saw on his phone that he had one of the apps that allows you to secretly screenshot snaps without letting the other person know.  \n\nWhen he returned, I asked again. And he said maybe he saved a few and that he only did it because he really liked them and he saved them for fun. I begged him to delete the pictures and he said no. So I left. And he deleted me off snapchat. \n\nThis guy that I trusted, has nudes of me. I am terrified and I understand I should never ever taken them in the first place. But I never thought he would be this kind of person. He was so sweet in the beginning. I fear he'll share them and ruin my career. I had a nightmare last night that he had cameras in his bedroom and that he has videos too. I don't know what to do anymore.", "summary": "Sexted with a fwb on snapchat; he refuses to delete them. I am in fear of him distributing them. How do I convince him to delete them?"}
{"id": "t3_mt40b", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Guilt about loans: holding me back, or keeping me from being a moron (again)?", "post": "I graduated college with no debt 5 years ago (majored in English Literature, mistake number one), then threw that all in the garbage by taking out a large student loan to start a graduate program I subsequently quit.\n\nI have been working whatever part-time jobs come my way since then. I promised myself that if I ever go back to school, I would save up my money first and pay my own way because I felt so stupid about being in debt with this loan for no reason.\n\nBut I have recently decided what I want to do with my life. I want to go back to school to get started on this path, but my current job pays less than 10 dollars an hour and I can't imagine how long it would take to save up enough money to really get started.\n\nShould I go ahead and take out loans to finance my education now that I know what I want to do? Or is my guilt and hesitancy about debt rational? I know I'm miserable right now, but nothing is guaranteed and I feel like I may just be setting myself up for more misery and even deeper debt down the road if I still can't find a decent job later on (I want to go back to school to become a teacher and I know sometimes it's difficult for new teachers to find work). I really can't see finding a stable decent job with the degree I already have. I'd appreciate any advice.", "summary": "Paying off a loan for a degree I never got, now I want to go back to school but I would need to take out more loans. Should I go ahead?"}
{"id": "t3_28mk8x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (25F) and my guy (25M) of 6 years are in a bit of a huge argument due to another girl who has caused problems before.", "post": "Let's see my ex SO of 5 years and I have been trying to work things out, but there are some factors that pretty much scream RUN. It starts off during the middle of our relationship when he talked to this girl during us dating, it caused us to break up because I would constantly bitch to him about how its fucked up he is talking to another girl so much. It turn out that I was right in the end about them \"talking\". Well we got back together not too long after I found out, because he was begging and promising that he did not know what he was doing and that he would drop it and I was in a tough place because I lost someone(death). Well years have passed, and we had broken up again. This time he told me that he had liked her, months later we started to try and rekindle things and then I saw him talking to her again, but he claimed he was fighting with her because she was talking to a kid he did not like. I asked him why he cared so much, and he said it was because she was his friend and he despises the kid. Which I know it total bullshit, but yet we were still trying to work on things. After months have passed, we still are trying until he started hanging out at her house, and she has been attending parties at his with her boyfriend and all because they all have mutual friends. He will talk to her, and continue to hang with her and friends. This is all no problem since we are technically not together. The issue is he does not understand why I would not be with him if he was friends with her, and he thinks it would be okay to be friends with this girl if we did get back together. Can someone give me their opinion as to what you think about all that?", "summary": "Ex broke my trust multiple times with this girl, and does not understand why I dont want to be with him if he is only friends with her?"}
{"id": "t3_39ma54", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my bf [24M] of 2 years are having issues because of my personal problems", "post": "I have a history of ending relationships out of nowhere. I'm not entirely sure why besides that I just get scared of the commitment that comes with long term relationships.\n\nAs of recently, I have just been feeling really not myself. I have good days and I have bad days where I feel really low. On the good days I'm convinced that I'm just being weird and that it will pass. On bad days I feel really negative and agitated.\n\nAs of recently the low days are outnumbering the good days. I feel very irritable and I feel so bad for how my bf has to deal with it. I sometimes don't feel like being touched. He is so loving and just wants to be near me and snuggle all the time but it just makes me push him away and get agitated. The more I push the more he tries to fix it and by being more loving.\n\nI have zero sex drive and I end up declining his advances because I never feel up to it. We talked last night and he said he feels like I don't care about him as much anymore. That broke my heart because i feel absolutely terrible with how I have been treating him.. being distant and not wanting to have sex. And I know he has to feel that way based off of how I act but I am having a hard time dictating how I feel and why.\n\nI don't think it is the relationship unless I just don't like being smothered with attention but it feels more than that. I quit my recent job because it was too emotionally draining and I feel like I want something but I just can't put my finger on what.", "summary": "I have been feeling \"off\" and it makes me agitated and distant towards my boyfriend who in return feels like I care about him less. I don't know what's wrong."}
{"id": "t3_2j6jlq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23M] am seeing a girl [20F] unlike any girl I've ever seen before.", "post": "I met a girl on OKCupid. We met up, clicked, and have been out around 10 times together now. We both live at our respective homes, me as I pay off my student loans, whereas she is a commuter at her university. \n\nWe've expressed multiple times how it would be great to actually finish a date and spend the night together but sadly it just hasn't happened yet. We are exclusively seeing one another and I'm very happy.  \n\nI am in a situation I've never been in before, as she is a very independent girl and I'm used to ones that are more communicative and open with what they are feeling and doing. I have a hard time trying to figure out what is going on in her mind. Because of this, I'm not sure if I'm being too distant or too clingy when I message her or see her. \n\nCan anyone else who has been in this situation before, shed some light on what they did to put themselves at ease while seeing someone independent? I like this girl a lot but don't want to scare her off by encroaching on her \"me\" time.", "summary": "I am seeing a super independent girl and am not sure how to toe the line between keeping in contact and friendly banter and being too clingy and smother her."}
{"id": "t3_35glxc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(M/17) How to let go of a shitty friend (F/15)?", "post": "I been friends with this cute girl for about a  2 years now. Although I am somewhat a little romantically in love with her (we hold hands, cuddle at home, give light kisses to each other but not  in the lips), I still get jealous when she hangs around with guys and does stuff without me. Although I care for her deeply.\n\nSo far she's been doing stuff that I don't agree with which includes doing illegal drugs, drinking alcohol excessively, having sex with other girls, and hanging out with the wrong type of people like the druggie, gang-banger, shady type of people. I feel like telling her parents or reporting her to the police for drug possession so that she can stop endangering herself with these type of people, since she is and acts far too young to be doing all this.\n\nEven though she is one of my best friends and I tell her to stop doing these things but she goes on how I'm being a too much of a \"goody goody\" in her words, I no longer want to be associated with this type of person, but I cannot help my self to break contact with her since I see her everyday at school, we talk almost everyday, she lives near me, and she is the closest I ever had to a girlfriend. \n\nWhat can I do to ensure that I can successfully break away from her? And should I tell her parents about his?", "summary": "One of my best friend keeps doing illegal activities, how do I take her out of my life? and should I contact her parents about it?"}
{"id": "t3_1dlvct", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My girlfriends Bday is coming up. I have access to a 3D printer. IDEAS!?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for a bit over 3 months and her b-day is coming up. I'd like to do something special for her. It's been a huge struggle to figure out what to buy/make for her as a present because she literally doesn't want ANYTHING. She is a very charitable person and is always looking into volunteering and donating. At first I was thinking of donating to a charity/organization of her choice, but I decided that I actually want to do something instead (or maybe along with donating). I have access to a 3D printer that my buddy owns so I was thinking of making something using that. However there are a couple of problems which is why I am making my plea to you redditors!\n\n1) I have no artistic capabilities and can not graphically design anything. Thus it must be something that already exists (for example things from thingiverse.com) (Or if one of you amazing redditors can make me something that would be beyond amazing!)\n\n2) I want it to be thoughtful and a tiny bit cheesy, but something that tailors to her charitable, nice, intelligent traits.\n\n3) I have about 20 days to make and paint whatever object I decide upon.\n\nHere are a few ideas I saw on thingiverse.com that caught my eye:\n[Heart and Key](\n\n[Nice Bracelet](\n\n[Twisty Bracelet](\n\nI looked around for a good subreddit for this and I feel like this is somewhat of a thought-provoking question, hence why I posted it here.", "summary": "Need ideas for girlfriends b-day that can be printed on a 3D printer. No artistic abilities thus must be already made."}
{"id": "t3_364v07", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my close friend [31 F] became intimate but now things are awkward.", "post": "So I have been in a serious long term relationship for 4 years with my girlfriend and by serious I mean I am thinking about proposing within the next year.  However, about 2 years ago I met a really amazing girl, lets call her C.  C and I have been getting closer - we text regularly, are able to make fun of each other like I do with my bros, and we usually go out for drinks at least once a week (i let my gf know this of course).  We really connect as we have the same career (finance) and she is one of the more interesting individuals i have ever met and understands me (very few people do as I think I am quite complicated).  Anyways, the other night we went out for drinks and ended up at her place.  We had a few more drinks and we end up making out - this was one of the most passionate make-out sessions I've had in a long time.  The next morning, we sober up a bit and now things are a bit awkward and I feel like shit for cheating.  She says to me that if I have no intention of being with her, its best that we don't see each other anymore. She's out of town for the weekend as she has family matters to attend to and we will talk when she's back.  \n\nI know this is selfish but I don't want to lose C as a friend and also don't want to break up with my current gf.  I'm aware that it's not fair to C but it feels like my best friend just suddenly died.  I'm not sure which direction to go ie \n\n1) break up, date C\n\n2) Never talk or see C again\n\n3) Do shit all and go with the flow\n\nAny advice on what to say when I meet up with C or advice on what to do is appreciated, thanks.", "summary": "In long term relationship, made out with close friend, close friend wants to be more than just friends but I am confused right now which way to go."}
{"id": "t3_2qgp0f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (27 F) shed a lot of hair and my boyfriend (37 F) wants me to pick up every single one of them in the bathroom each time.", "post": "If you ever lived with a girl before or you are one, you should know that girls shed a lot and their loose strands can be found pretty much anywhere in the house. \n\nUnderstandably, my boyfriend gets incredibly annoyed that he finds so many of them in our bathroom. So now, every time I'm in the bathroom, I always make sure to pick a bunch of my loose hair on the ground and then throw it away. I also brush my hair daily to make sure that I can catch the loose hair before they drop to the ground.\n\nI don't manage to pick up each and every loose strand in the bathroom and that's what he finds unacceptable. The bathroom floor has to be completely free of my hair but the problem is I shed a lot and so often that I can't be spending all of my time cleaning up all my hairs.\n\nIs he being unreasonable?", "summary": "I do my best to pick my loose hairs in the bathroom but the fact that I don't pick up ALL of them is unacceptable to my boyfriend. Is he being fair?"}
{"id": "t3_wyg0k", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey, Reddit, I feel like I have a lot of repressed and most likely misplaced anger towards female gamers/nerds. People who may feel similar, do you consciously know why?", "post": "Obviously, it can't be all that repressed if I'm making a thread about it right now. The anonymity helps me to speak about it more openly, I believe.\n\nFrom that Nerdy Nummies chick on YouTube to pretty much 90% of the women I've raided with in WoW. Even the woman that I play with in league and know IRL irritate me greatly, even though I'd never admit it out loud.\n\nThe only motive I can think up that would make me so upset is that they are applauded for embracing their \"geekdom\" while most males are criticized. Which is pretty stupid since I like women and playing with them should be enjoyable. They tend to have pleasing voices and be more willing to play support roles(100% personal experience).", "summary": "Please tell me why it's okay to be annoyed by women who play games so I can refrain from dealing with the fact I'm a misogynist neckbeard who's unsatisfied with his own manhood or something like that."}
{"id": "t3_4czrr8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [29 M] don't think I'm falling in love with my [28 F] new gf, same as last time. Worried I've got a pattern", "post": "Been seeing this girl for about a month, but we're not committed because I told her I'm not ready. She wants to be in a committed relationship. \n\nShe's had enough experience to know she won't have sex until then, which is okay with me (though not how I usually do it). \n\nWe have a lot in common: get along, have similar interests, etc. She's pretty cute and just finished grad school. I guess she fits the bill.\n\nBut I'm just not that excited about it. Lukewarm.\n\nBack in January I broke up with my girlfriend of 5 months for the same reason, and a year ago I did the same with a girl of 2 months. All 3 girls wanted to keep dating me. \n\nThere have been a few girls I've been excited about after a date or two, but they weren't that into me.\n\nI'm afraid I'm victim to the old Groucho Marx quote, \"I don't care to belong to any club that will have me as a member.\"\n\nThese girls are catches and I'm beating myself up for not being that into them.\n\nMaybe this is normal and just called dating. Should I break up with current girl right now? \n\nDo I just need to be patient and wait for feelings to build? That didn't work last time.\n\nShould I just be patient and hold out until a girl knocks my socks off? I think I've really gotta \"fall\" for them. But maybe my standards are too high.", "summary": "This great girl really likes me but I don't think I'm falling in love with her, same as happened in previous relationships. Is this is a neurosis, a pattern & practice, or just normal?"}
{"id": "t3_4re92h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] gf [20F] sent me a really cryptic message about something she wants to talk about, but won't talk right now", "post": "I'm currently long distance with my gf for about two months since she's interning elsewhere. Last Friday I went to a workshop in another city (and am still here), and I noticed she just ceased all communication over the weekend. I sent her some messages asking what's going on, and she finally responded last night with the following sequence of messages.\n\nher: Ill talk to u when u get back from dc\n\nme: huh why\n\nher: I have something i want to talk to u about but not while youre there so ill wait for u to come back first\n\nme: i can Skype you now\n\nher: No, ill talk to u when youre back\n\nme: why does it matter where I'm at\n\nher: Oh, didnt see this\nIll just talk to u when u get back, i dont want to talk about it right now\n\nme: you said that already\n\nher: I dont have anything else to say atm\n\nI'm going back home in two days (to my place, not where she's currently at), but I can't stop thinking about this today, and it's distracting me from other things. I don't really want to press her further if she's unwilling to talk, but on the other hand I need a better understanding of what's going on right now.. if someone can help me decipher the cryptic messages she sent, it would be much appreciated.\n\nWe've been apart for nearing two months now but I have a flight to visit her in a little under two weeks.", "summary": "long distance for two months, visiting her soon, but she suddenly stopped communicating over the weekend and now says she has something she wants to talk about but won't talk about it right now"}
{"id": "t3_x83ws", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Deep physical and emotional connection...but we don't want a relationship? Can someone explain?", "post": "I (male, 26) have a very good friend (female, 25) that I've recently gotten much closer to. Over the past month and a half or so we've come to realize that we are able to communicate and understand each other on a deeper level than with anyone else. We are incredibly similar, in all of the ways that truly matter. We see each other usually a few times a week, and talk every day, for most of the day, including at night for several hours. \nWe're also both physically attracted to one another, but she is just coming off of a breakup with a long term partner, and I am recently divorced, so we don't want to do anything with one another right now. But the desire is there.\n\nThe thing is, though, that we both agree...we don't feel like we want to be in a romantic relationship with one another. We don't want to \"date\". It seems...weird to us. \n\nSo my question is, what is this relationship? If we get along so well, have such a profound connection, spend so much time together, and are physically attracted to each other, why do we not feel like we want to date each other?", "summary": "good friend and I have all the makings of a great romantic relationship, but neither of us wants to date the other. Why? What is this relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_3glhd3", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Things to do in Vienna?", "post": "In end of September or start of October girlfriend and I are going to Vienna. My cousin has a flat there so accommodation is taken care of as well as transport (train). Thing is I really don't know what is there to see apart form Madame Tussaud, Prater and Starbucks which girlfriend insists we go there (there are non in my country). Heard also something about the Zoo, is it worth it? We are planing on 5 day stay and we want to cover as much city as possible so if any one can list a local website for public transport that would be great or any info sites(aside of vienna info) Apart from all the sights any good restaurants near the center (or main train station as the flat is somewhere near) or any local pubs where young people like to gather? If any one can list a bit ''less tourist-y'' locations or less known yet still interesting it would be also great. \nI don't speak German well, is it possible to communicate with locals in English? Girlfriend does speak German but I'd like to participate in talking. And what are prices in general there?", "summary": "Planing 5 day trip to Vienna, interested in all known and less know locations, good yet not to expansive restaurants, pubs welcome as well."}
{"id": "t3_2aa4l7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [mid twenties/F] with my overseas family--is it okay if I don't make initiative anymore now that several months have passed by since I last saw them?", "post": "I love them dearly and our family is very close despite the distance, but because of my headspace (ADHD and past history with PTSD and anxiety) several months later, I don't feel connected like I used to because I haven't seen them for such a long time and my memories have drastically faded since it's been half a year now.  \n\nI used to reach out a lot, but now I don't feel the need to reach out at all.  Is it okay if I don't make the initiative with them anymore now that several months have passed by since I last saw them?  I'll probably see them again in less than a year.  I don't want it to seem like I'm upset at them or anything, I just feel like my 'needs' have changed.", "summary": "Me [mid twenties/F] with my overseas family--is it okay if I don't make initiative anymore now that several months have passed by since I last saw them?"}
{"id": "t3_1v73lh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[18F] do not know what to do with my boyfriend[20M] of a year and a half , with him going away for school.", "post": "So my boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. And everything is perfectly fine. We have a great relationship with no problems, never broke up. We're really happy!  \n\nHe's a junior in college and I'm a freshman in college, I commute to a local university and he went away to school then came back  commuted to a community college for a year and now he recently got into a university where he has to go away again. We talked about it and I was really upset but I understand it's what he has to do. \n\nIt's not even distance will be the problem, it's not that far away at all, Problem is, is that he's never been single going in college and wants to try it out. He's been in relationships starting from like his sophomore year of high school. He dated a girl for 6 months, then dated a girl for 2 years, and then met me right after and we instantly clicked. But on the other hand he said really loves being with me and what we have is really good! \n\nHe doesn't know what to do. I do not know what to do.  He knows if he breaks up with me it will probably never be the same and that he will miss me, but he's telling me that he's so unsure it's eating him up. He said he kind of wants to realize he needs me by being away but I really want to stay together and see how it works out and then decide. He leaves in a week. What do you guys think we should do? Anyone have any similar stories or went through the same thing? Opinions?", "summary": "My boyfriend is going away for school, not sure if he wants to stay with me or be single, need some advice"}
{"id": "t3_2q02qz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 F] went out with this guy[25 M] and now I fell in love with him..", "post": "We're known each other from the internet for 7 years, exchanged pics, talked a lot in the past on the internet, liked each other a lot, but in the last 2 years, none of us kept in touch. \n\nWe work in different cities, 6-7 hours car distance. \n\nA few months ago, my job offered me the opportunity to work in his city, for 5 months. One week before I left, I contacted him and asked him out; he didn't know I was there. He accepted and we stayed like 6 hours to talk without any sexual or romantic topic. \n\nAt the end of the \"date\" he asked me when I'm coming back and he said that \"now you have my number, you can call me at any time\". And I told him that maybe we will see each other again and he said \"of course we will\" and that's it, he hadn't contacted me since and I don't know if I shoud do it, but I dont wanna push things... \n\nNow a little of myself: I'm recently out of a 5 year relationship and planned to relocate in that city and I feel stuck with this guy in my mind, because he is as I always known him: smart, interesting, people person, handsome etc. \n\nThe relocation means professional oportunities for me, but I'm not sure my boss will let me go and lately I also consider relocation for this guy but when I try to conclude things, I get extremely confused because I'm not sure he likes me more than an old internet buddy", "summary": "In love with an old friend, living in different cities, not sure if he REALLY likes me and I consider relocation there, so where do I go from here ? Am I immature?"}
{"id": "t3_17spu9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24M] am afraid to become over-attached to [22F]", "post": "We have dated for 5 month now and she is my official GF for 1,5month and I am afraid I might get over-attached and that I am turning into someone I do not want to be. One example, an old-highschool friend visited her and they went out partying (I went somewhere else) and he spent the night at her place (we dont live together and he doesnt live close). I am totally okay with that and I know that since she only has one huge bed and no couch that he slept in one bed with her. I trust her and I know that she would never cheat on me but still I become paranoid. She accidentally called me by his name today (and she was so embarrassed and sorry) and that freaked me the fuck out. I know that she loves me a lot and she told me that she never felt that much in love before and I believe her. Why do I still become paranoid? I couldnt sleep tonight because I was creating scenarios in my head in which she cheated on me or something else bad happened.\n\nDo I have self-esteem issues or something?\n\nI am someone who needs a lot of freedom in relationships. If I wanted to visit a female friend and platonically spend the night and I couldn't because my GF wouldnt let me, I would be so annoyed, so it seems just natural to me to give her the same freedom I am expecting of her but why can't I just be cooler about this? It feels like my emotional shields protecting me from my own paranoia are completely shut down. It feels a little like I am tripping out on MDMA or something.", "summary": "I want to give my GF freedom, but I somehow freak out about nothing even though I trust her. How do I keep my cool? I dont wanna turn into an over-protective over-attached asshole."}
{"id": "t3_ktrdt", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Mediocre problem with my \"girlfriend\" or whatever you may call it.", "post": "So.. this seems like a very mediocre problem but it has been bothering me for the longest time.\n\n1. We've been together for about four months. \n2. She isn't my girlfriend. She says she doesn't like the title of being a girlfriend and that her first boyfriend was awful. So she was only \"dating\" the previous \"boyfriends\" she has had. (So technically she has only had 1 boyfriend and the other guys were just relationships)\n3. She never has time or makes the time (She says she's incredibly busy). We probably hang out about every two weeks unless I push hard for some time to hang out. \n4. I don't know what else. She's someone I thought I would actually like and it kind of just happened. Before, she used to think I was this cool, super outgoing person (things she said before I had an interest in her) while she was this super shy girl (who actually seemed to waver on the social side). But now I'm interested in her in ways I never would've thought because of her personality and her drive and how different and unique she is to just about any other girl I have ever dated. \n5. I'm also afraid that maybe we moved too fast. Was sex on first date bad? Did it make it so it becomes hard to build a relationship since there was no tension building up on it?\n6. She has never introduced me to anybody and shoos me out whenever she is expecting anybody. \n*I just want to build that she is the type that spent her life alone from middle school to high school. Would this be the reason she treats me so? \n7. Am I just a fuck buddy to her?\n\nThe real question I'm asking is whether she isn't making the time for me because she genuinely doesn't have an interest for me and I should end the relationship or make some kind of ultimatum. Or if it is because she really is busy and really doesn't expect much time out of our relationship but she actually does hold an interest. We also live only about 3 blocks away from each other.", "summary": "In a relationship with girl; not girlfriend. Doesn't show any interest and never has time. Has sex a lot. Is she into me or am I just a fuck buddy?"}
{"id": "t3_3ybrcd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [20 F] of 6 months is scared that i [22 M], might cheat on her!", "post": "My girlfriend is in another country for a few months and she is scared whenever i go out that i might cheat on her with someone. I love her a lot and i would never even think about doing such thing, i'm always telling her where im going, we are texting basically 24/7 and video chatting etc. I sometimes send her pictures from the places i go to and the people i am with. \n\nBut today she told me that whenever i go out she is thinking that i might cheat on her. I told her that her insecurity might cause problems in the future. I don't know why she would think like this, i would do everything for this girl. \nI asked her if in the past releationship someone cheated on her, but she said no, but who knows what happened right? Maybe she was the one cheating and now she is worried that it will come back to her or something... Any ideas on how to solve this problem?", "summary": "Gf thinks i might cheat on her when i go out while she is not home for a few months, We text, skype 24/7 but for some reason she has stupid thoughts about me cheating on her."}
{"id": "t3_15xnol", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25/m] Enamored of my best friend's sister [21/f]", "post": "Using a throwaway just to be safe. Mostly.\n\nI've known one of my friends for around 10 years, and though we no longer live near each other, I make an effort to spend time with her a few times a year. She's practically a sister to me. In that time I've become close to her family, including one of her sisters, let's call her Olivia.\n\nOlivia may or may not have been fond of me for some time. In recent years, my friend sent me teasing texts like, \"When are you visiting again? Olivia misses you.\" At the time, I liked Olivia as much as one likes any annoying-but-somehow-endearing younger sisters of your best friend, so I rolled my eyes and humored her. I figured it was a phase, and it probably was.\n\nWell, as it happens, I hate myself; Olivia has grown on me. After teasing Olivia through her college years for being in a related discipline embroiled in a conflict with my own, she switched to my major. Funny, that. Having the ability to share in obtuse conversations certainly enabled us to spend more time together, and I find myself stupidly grinning at even the worst of her puns.\n\nFast forward to the present. Olivia and I are both graduating in the spring. Part of me knows that keeping my mouth shut is the safer course of action, and much of this could just be me projecting, but I still want to open up to my friend before we all part ways. I'm trying to conceive how best to broach the topic with her, as it's going to be awkward regardless. I know all the risks involved, and I even considered the cataclysmic scenario in which it's my friend and not her sister who has feelings for me, which is ridiculous, but you know what they say about truth and fiction.", "summary": "Falling for my best friend's sister, not sure if the feelings are reciprocal, deciding whether or not to potentially shoot myself in the foot by opening up to my friend"}
{"id": "t3_3u3c2k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My cousin [f31] is getting married in June and asked me [f21] to be her maid of honour. I have no free time and don't know what to do", "post": "So my cousin is getting married and while I'm really happy for her I don't think I'm responsible enough to take on the MOH role. I'm in school and also have a job. I've never even been to a wedding! Her friends organized a surprise engagement party for her and I feel horrible for not partaking. I just feel an immense amount of pressure and to be honest I don't necessarily want the responsibility. \n\nMy cousin knows this, yet still gives me hints that I should start organizing something. I don't even know where to begin. I have too much on my plate right now really need to get my shit together. I know she will get really upset if I tell her I can't do it. \n\nWhat do I do Reddit?", "summary": "cousin asked me to be MOH at her wedding. I have too much on my plate to organize anything and I know she won't forgive me if I bail"}
{"id": "t3_3ymn51", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Insecure about every opinion I have about art and entertainment", "post": "I'm extremely worried about my opinions on anything related to music, movies, books, shows, or otherwise related to matters of taste and culture.  I'm worried that I'll say the wrong thing and that what I like or dislike will somehow reflect negatively on my intelligence or worth.  There's a sizeable chunk of the internet that seems to hold an unwritten notion that the minority of smart people like one set of things and the \"idiot masses\" like another set of things and never the twain shall meet.  I don't know if I'm smart or if I'm part of the ostensibly vast masses of idiots that are, according to various rants I've read, apparently responsible for the death of culture and the plummeting quality of everything.\n\nTo make things more difficult, I don't know which opinion I read on something is the \"smart\" opinion.  So I don't even know what I should even be looking for.  All I know is I've seen a couple of movies recently and I've been scared to death to say anything about them lest I confirm my nagging doubts about my intelligence and perception (or, rather, lack thereof).", "summary": "I'm insecure about my opinions in entertainment.  I don't know if I'm smart or not, and if my opinions will reflect negatively on me in that respect."}
{"id": "t3_2c3ndb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 M] am very certain my gf [20] is going to break up with me tomorrow. What would you do?", "post": "We've been together almost two years now and it's only recently been getting really rocky. \n\nI screwed up a an outing (concert) by getting too drunk and not really knowing the what was going on. \n\nIt wasn't the first time I got too wasted, but never liked to drink before, she kinda reintroduced me into it. I accept responsibility though. \n\nShe said she didn't know how to feel about us anymore and wanted time off. \n\nI've been devastated ever since. I left town to visit relatives the day after and am returning home tonight. \n\nIn that town, our mutual friend is there who happens to be my gfs best friend. I contacted her to ask for advice. \n\nGf told me she found that unattractive and immature of me, I told her I was just in search of a way to fix the problem because I love her so dearly. \n\nShe asked if I was back in town, I said no. She asked me to tell her when I get back because we'll have to talk... \n\nWhat do I do?", "summary": "I have reason to believe my girlfriend is going to break up with me in person tomorrow. I want to do everything I can to save this relationship. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_hpahk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Carpooling is financially beneficial, but I can't deal with my coworker all day long every day", "post": "My coworker and I have to drive to a city over an hour away every day for work. So financially it makes sense for us to take turns driving. The problem is, I can't stand this guy all day long. I come home from work every day exhausted--not from the work but from being around my coworker for the whole day.\n\nHe talks too much, either about meaningless bullshit or really, really weird things for which there are no good responses. He complains all the time about who's not doing enough work or how others are doing their jobs, etc, no matter how many times I tell him to quit worrying about everyone else and just do his own work. And this is all made worse by the fact that we have to get up really early to be at work on time and I do not do well with that.\n\nFrankly, it'd be worth the financial hit to not have to spend every day with this guy.\n\nAnyone have any advice on how I can nicely break the carpooling setup or something? He likes me a lot and he's the one who got me this job, so I don't want to be mean and tell him the honest reason why I don't want to drive with him every day.", "summary": "can't stand coworker all day every day, need to find a way to break financially beneficial carpooling arrangement without hurting his feelings."}
{"id": "t3_49nwvy", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Can I refuse to sign an amendment to my Employer contract which was not pre-agreed? (Location: UK - Wales)", "post": "What are my options in relation to changes being made to my employment contract? Can I refuse to sign something I did not agree to without it affecting my employment?\n\nBackground:\nMy employer pays for our exams and training. It has not been stated that we would need to repay these costs until recently. It was announced last month  (2 days after I booked my next exam) that we would be liable to repay costs in the event we leave the company within 36 months of the cost being incurred. Today we have been given a document stating it's an amendment to our contract amednmnd the changes are to be implemented immediately.\n\nMy problem is I have an interview lined up 31 March. I've had a first interview with the company (1 march) and they have called me back for a second interview. \n\nI calculate the costs I would owe my current employer as \u00a3530. I only earn \u00a31,106 at present and cannot afford to lose that amount from my pay or I cannot afford to pay my half of the bills/rent and my SO wouldn't have the available funds to help me out.\n\nCan I refuse to sign this document? What is the smartest move here considering I did not agree to these costs prior to taking the exams and certainly wouldn't have sat them if I had known?\n\nMy issue is that I don't want to kick up a fuss and create tension if I don't end up getting the job. But on the other hand, the interview is promising (I have a friend at the company and the Directors I've already met have apparently gone up to her and told her how impressed hey were... so I'm hopeful).\n\nI think that's enough info.... but happy to expand if necessary. New job would be a  \u00a34,500 pay increase; walking distance so less fuel costs; less travel time etc.", "summary": "employer is making changes to my contract and they have asked me to sign it. How can I refuse and would this affect my employment?"}
{"id": "t3_3ygbh9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my ex [19F] of 2 years, when we decided to break up for the semester, we said we'd talk during the winter break, but...", "post": "My ex girlfriend and I dated for 2 years and broke up at the beginning of September, we ended in good terms and stayed in touch throughout the semester. When we broke up though she said she didn't want us to stop talking, and we'd talk about us in the Winter break... \n\nHere comes the winter break, and 2 weeks later we've hung out twice. Once with all of our friends, and once just the two of us (we didn't talk about us just had lunch and caught up. It went well and i even noticed she's still wearing a ring i gave her on our 2 year anniversary). \n\nNow though, I asked her if we could talk yesterday and she didn't respond at all and it's almost like she's avoiding talking about it. Today, she wasn't in a good mood when i texted her to see if we can meet and talk about us. Caught off guard, i told her if she didn't want to talk about it right now, i'd back off. She responded with \"That would be nice.\" \n\nI'm just confused with what's going on. It seemed like we were going to get back together, as she was still wearing the ring, and well I may just be blinded because i want her back. But now I'm just unsure, confused and a little hurt. I'm going to back off as i said i would, and contact her again in weeks to come.", "summary": "Ex Gf and i said we'd talk after a break up of 4 months-ish, but she seems to avoid it. Do any of you guys have any thoughts on this? I'm just in need to talk to someone."}
{"id": "t3_3f5dit", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] can't help being jealous of my best friend [20 M] and it's hurting our relationship", "post": "My best friend from high school, let's call him Harry, is really successful. Like, ridiculously so. Self-made multi-millionaire at 20 after starting his own business at 18 while also graduating from university 2 years early. We were rivals in a bunch of things at school, and it wasn't a problem, but had a big fight when I was rejected from my first-choice university after Harry also applied and got in with a very similar resume, even though he had no intention of going. We made up, and later he offered me a chance to join him in starting his business (part-time while studying), but I declined.\n\nIn hindsight, I think that not putting enough effort into university applications and not being willing to commit to the work associated with a start-up are two of the worst decisions I've made. I'm fairly high-achieving by most standards: have ended up at a top university anyway, getting good grades, currently working a well-paid internship, etc. Of course it's difficult not to be comparative, but by itself the fact that I'm jealous of Harry is something I think I can deal with. What's making it really problematic that his successes are closely correlated with my own biggest regrets. Since we're living in different countries right now, it takes some effort to Skype and stay in contact; but because of those associations and the emotional response I get when thinking about them, I'm increasingly hesitant to do so (he talks about his academic and corporate work a fair bit, since they're very big parts of his life right now), and have to focus on pushing down those feelings when we're talking. Of course this is my problem not his, and I'm not sure it's the sort of thing I'd want to discuss with him, but I'm wondering how people would recommend dealing with this.", "summary": "Want to be happy for my friend's successes but they're reminding me specifically of my own regrets; advice for dealing with this?"}
{"id": "t3_49lw9q", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Protecting my brand - question", "post": "I'm starting a business (only local and online at first, no brick and mortar) and at first this will only be selling apparel. \n\nI have a name of the business, a name of the apparel line, and a logo. I've check trademarks and everything is fine - do I need to trademark the name before I sell anything? \n\nThe trademark (I believe has to be done separate since the names are slightly different between company name and apparel line name) is expensive I think (700 up front maybe?) - didn't know without doing that if I had any protection if someone stole my name and or logo.", "summary": "if I start an apparel line and don't trademark the name or logo, do I have any protection against someone stealing my name/logo? [USA] [Pennsylvania]"}
{"id": "t3_2265nt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my Ex-Fiancee[27 F] 5 years, how long until it doesn't matter?", "post": "Fairly new Redditor here, and a private person so posting something like this should show the level of lost I'm at...also sorry if format is wonky. \n\nAnyway, had a relationship with an awesome girl starting Jr year of college and extending through 3 years after graduation. A little bickering but no big fights and we got along really well 95% of the time. We had moved in together, both had stable jobs and were engaged to be married in 7 months time. (Had been engaged about a year at this point.)\n\nOne night she wakes me up 1-2 AM and simply says \"I'm done.\" No clue or hints leading up to it, just two words, goes downstairs to sleep on the couch, and has packed essentials for a move to parents house while I am at work the next day. In 6 months she's married a new guy but claims all that happened \"after us.\" Come to find out her parents resented me for... reasons (honestly never clear on the what or why) and basically had been telling her to do better for a few years. YEARS! \n\nSo...it's two years later and I'm with a wonderful girl for almost a year now. Problem is I go into these funks where all I can think about is what I lost, what could I do different, etc. This sounds bad but probably 2-3 times a month I wake up and my first waking thought is crippling disappointment that she's not there next to me. I am 100% committed with my current girl, but deep deep down I don't know how I would feel if relationship prospects with the ex weren't 100% killed. How long (or how do I) get back to \"normal\"? Any advice on ways to stop dreaming/imagining about the life we were planning?\n\nThank you fellow Redditors.", "summary": "Ex fianc\u00e9e left me 2 years ago, how long until it stops weighing on my psyche/life in general?"}
{"id": "t3_htosk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have lost all my motivation to go to work", "post": "I recently switched jobs (5 months) from a larger institution to a smaller company. Over the last month I have gotten very disillusioned with my new job, I miss the camaraderie of my old job as well as the lower level of stress. Also the old job was much closer to my house.\n\nFor me the most important thing is not my job, I don't have the ambition to be in a super high paying job, I like having an average job if it means I have the energy and motivation to do that and extracurriculars.\n\nI recently applied to a different job posting at my old company. I feel totally unmotivated to go to work and I've called in \"sick\" about 3-4 times the last month....\n\nI guess what I'm asking is; how do I stay motivated to keep going to work right now, at least until I get another job, and should I just go back to my old boss and ask him for my old job back (as opposed to trying for this new position). He mentioned I could do that because he likes me.", "summary": "got new job, don't like it anymore, can't motivate myself to go, should I beg for my old job back?"}
{"id": "t3_1rdlia", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [20 M] went on a date but was it really a date?", "post": "So first a little bit of backstory to put things into context: I recently started university and got along well with a girl. I subsequently asked her out for dinner to which she accepted. It wasn't explicitly mentioned that it was a date but I guess I assumed it was implied which probably was a bad idea. The \"date\" went extremely well and I did have a wonderful time with her and although I really do like her, I get the impression it's one sided.\n\nDuring the date, I told her that I considered this a date and whatnot and well I feel like I've put my foot in my mouth. How do I now tell her that I don't really care what happens and I would rather keep her as a friend than be awkward around each other?", "summary": "Went on a date which may not have been a date in her eyes. Let her know and now it's a little awkward but would prefer it not to be. How do I go about talking about it?"}
{"id": "t3_35ober", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[HELP] My girlfriend's dog isn't trained, and she refuses to let me train him...", "post": "Her dog has been with her since it was 8 weeks old. He is always at her side and she spoils him.\n\nHe also has the bad habit of begging for food when we are eating because she gives him food from her plate. She believes dogs in nature just expect humans to share food with them and she is completely okay with letting him lick the plates and bowls clean \"if he didn't beg\". Which just means if he lays by her feet and stares at her, she will eventually give him food. How can I break this behavior?\n\nHe also doesn't use his dog bed to sleep in, instead he humps it. And she allows him to hump it. He humps sheets, pillows, anything and she doesn't scold him at all. I'm afraid to get a cat because he might start humping it.\n\nUpon the front door opening he makes a break for it. He doesn't wait, doesn't hesitate. And just runs for it, which makes me afraid I might come home from work and he will run out and I'd have to chase him down.\n\nHe also barks randomly at random times even after being let out or played with. It's quite annoying when I'm trying to sleep and he is barking up a storm and scratching the bed I'm sleeping on.\n\nHe sleeps on top of the couch and I try to make sure he stays off the furniture but according to her \" thats just what he does\"\n\nIf he is on my bed or the couch he will also start trying to dig and I dont like him doing that to my sheets because he's a dog with nails and I don't want my sheets or couch ripped.\n\nEvery time I try to bring these issues up to her she tells me it's her dog, not to yell at him, don't push him down when he's jumping on things, etc.\n\nHow do I fix this situation? Or am I overreacting?", "summary": "girlsfriends dog is not well trained and she believes it is fine. But I believe a dog should be trained. Am I overreacting with the dog's bad behavior?"}
{"id": "t3_eupn9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just found out my best friend self-harms. What do I do?", "post": "A bit of background on her: seventeen, in high school (as well as myself). Straight-A student, probably going Ivy League. Quiet around most people, loud and hyperactive around me. Likes to read. Popular, but I've noticed she seems to crave attention a lot -- she's a self-described 'camwhore' with a 'god complex', and I've seen her do various 4chan tinychats with thirty or forty guys, even though she was [doxed] once. I don't ever say anything about it, as it's her business. She was also homeschooled as a kid -- didn't go to public school until age fourteen.\n\nShe has panic attacks and cuts typically when her parents tell her she's doing something wrong, whether it's minor or not. She says she 'doesn't like to think [she] does things wrong, just different' and she 'wants them to know she cares.' I know she cuts because she sent me a picture. I deleted it, even though I know now I really shouldn't have.\n\nI also know I have to tell someone, but I don't know who. Her parents wouldn't believe me, and she's convinced that cutting is the only way to release pain, so she won't get herself help. Can I help her? If so, whom should I go to? I'm not sure the school counselors are of any use -- I've been through this a few times with different people and different issues, and they're very negligent in these sorts of matters.", "summary": "friend self-harms, need to know how I can get help for her, I'm fairly certain I'm the worst friend ever."}
{"id": "t3_1ug8jp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The (shortened, not-so-detailed) story of me [16M] and my ex [15F]", "post": "Four things before I start: 1. I'll be using faux names, me as Jack, her as Kit. 2. It was short, but wonderfully amazing. 3. I am a junior, her a freshman. 4. She is bisexual\nSo, me and Kit met at band camp, and quickly became friends, mostly because we both play clarinet. Apparently, she really liked me from the start. I liked her as well. Jump ahead about a month, and you find me and Kit at an after-game party. She soon asks \"Hey Jack? Would you like to be my boyfriend?\". And I reply \"who wouldn't, Kit?\". Soon, we are cuddling on a nearby bench.\n\nJump ahead about 2 weeks, and you'll find Kit slowly unzipping my pants(we are both needy on the sexual side). Soon enough, I get a good sucking. And a little later, she gets a good show of my finger tricks. Again, jump ahead a week or so, and you join us in an adventure:\n\"Hey, Jack?\"\n\"Yeah?\"\n\"Where's the quietest place we can go?\"\n\"Follow me, my lovely Kit\"\nI lead her to the guest bedroom. She hops on the bed, and tells me to undo my pants. I do so, and then she follows. As I lean her back, I mention how sexy she is. It gets sweaty in that room for a few moments.\n\nSkip ahead, again, 2 weeks, and you'll find me sucking her breasts. Again(for the laat time), skip ahead a few weeks, and you'll find us hardly talking to each other.\n\nI'm gonna need help to get over this, guys.\nWe are friends, as in we still contact each other, and, plot twist, she would like to go to prom with me", "summary": "found a cute freshman at bandcamp, got intimate together, lasted about 2 and a half months, break up, depression for me."}
{"id": "t3_3mh2dr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Found out my (28F) best friend (29F) of 20 years had cancer for the past 7 years through a Facebook post. At a loss for words.", "post": "First, the goods news. She is no longer living with cancer!\n\nThis morning when I woke up and for some reason grabbed my phone and checked Facebook immediately. I rarely do this. This first post I see is from my best friend announcing that today is a good day because she is cancer free. I was in shock because I didn't even know she had cancer!\n\nClearly she has her reasons for not sharing this information with me, but I feel like an absolutely terrible friend that she felt she could not tell me. Furthermore, I have known a lot of people to get cancer in the past 7 years, and I always would tell her \"so and so has cancer and I'm really sad, hoping she/he will get better soon\" and if I'd known she also had cancer I wouldn't have brought it up so much!\n\nA bit of background on our friendship and why I feel I've been an insufficient friend to her:\nWe met in elementary school and were bffs. During my second year of high school, I had to move so we stopped seeing each other as much. We still hung out when we could and she was always my best friend. At the end of high school I started dating a guy who turned out to be abusive. We were together for 5 years, and throughout that time period he slowly isolated me from my friends and family, and said mean things about the people closest to me. (Things like my parents didn't really love me and other fucked up things.)\n\nAnyway, I got out of that relationship, so i started hanging out with her more again. It was a relief to me that she didn't completely hate me for my time spent being distant. For the past five years we've lived in different cities, but we still see each other once in a while and write letters to each other. (We've always sent each other snail mail)\n\nI'm currently working on a reply to one of her letters, but I don't know how to approach this topic, since I found out through social media and not a personal message. I already feel terrible that I haven't even sent her a text.", "summary": "My bff had cancer for years and I never knew. Feeling insecure and like a horrible friend. Not sure how to express to her how happy I am that she is OK."}
{"id": "t3_te0xa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Managers and/or military personnel; please help. What do you do when someone you're in charge of just won't listen to you or do his work?", "post": "I'm in a leadership position in ROTC and we are in charge of drilling and marching cadets. I have a slacker who just won't pay attention or listen to rules. He is always half-assing everything, and in turn other cadets follow his influence. My colonel is chewing my ass because I'm responsible for him. \n\nNothing I do phases him; he's the kind that was forced by parents into ROTC, and he's the kind of person who never follows rules and does drugs and has attitude problems. \n\nI try being nice to him, but that doesn't work. I gradually became stricter and stricter, even issuing push ups, and he flat out gave attitude to me and refused to do them.\n\nHelp?", "summary": "In ROTC, a slacker refuses to listen, and in turn my colonel chews my ass. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1i2p7t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[18M] I think I want to end a serious relationship, need advice. Her[16MF]", "post": "I have been dating this girl on, and off, for over 5 years, some may say it's probably not serious, but it is. But my ex [18F] has recently re-kindled a strong passion I had for her for a while, about 6 months. I want to give it another shot, but I don't know how to cut the ties with the relationship I am in. I really love my current girlfriend, but I want to give my ex another shot, and I have no idea what to do. My current girlfriend is very attached to me, and I don't want to lose her, so I need real advice.", "summary": "Recently started talking to an ex, want to give it a try, don't know where to end the current one I am in."}
{"id": "t3_2foe4n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] - cannot handle my friends [same age, M/F] hanging out with my parents", "post": "Hi - kind of a weird question / situation. I'll try to be brief.\n\nI am from country A, did high-school in country B, and am currently in the United States for college. My friends from country A are doing a month-and-a-half long trip to country B. Since my family lives in country B, I suggested that my friends, when they get to the city we live at, stay at our house so they don't have to pay for hotels and my parents could show them around.\n\nThe problem, as I found out, is that I *cannot deal with it*. \n\nI cannot stand the thought that my friends and my parents are making memories (in the most literal sense) without me. Like, these are two groups of people that have only come together because of me, and the fact that I am not there and that they are doing (fun) stuff together unrelated to me is making me really anxious. Basically, my parents are taking them out to restaurants/attractions and are basically being awesome for showing my friends around the city.\n\nI remember having this as a kid too, it just hasn't surfaced in a while. When I was about 6 or 7, it was my mom's turn to carpool the kids from school and everyone got to the car before me, and hence waited for like a minute until I got there. When I found out that they had all waited together for me (for a really insignificant amount of time, no one cared) I broke down and cried. I remember everyone being really confused and didn't understand when I tried to explain.\n\nSo, definitely something I need to talk to my therapist about, but I wanted to know if anyone has ever encountered something like this and what are people's thoughts on this.\n\nIt's like a weird mixture of FOMO/jealousy/homesickness. I realize this is not normal.", "summary": "my parents are being awesome for showing my friends around while I'm not home, and I cannot deal with them having fun and literally creating memories in which I am not present or related to."}
{"id": "t3_4ku8yj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my Girlfriend [17 F] of almost 3 years, suggested taking a break?", "post": "A large group of our friends are going to this weekend camping festival and due to the size of it and how we are all arriving on different days it is unlikely that I am sharing a tent with my girlfriend.\n\nShe recently suggested that we \"took a break\" for the festival. At first I was shocked and didn't know if it was because she didn't want to spend time with me, had stopped liking me and even wanting to go out getting with other boys.\n\nI obviously said no and asked why she wanted that and she just said she trusted me however didn't trust my friends and thinks they would egg me on to get with other girls and fool around a bit.\n\nI'm really confused about the whole situation, she says she was \"testing me\" to see if I would want to take a break however that feels like she doesn't trust me. Also I feel like maybe she doesn't like me as much as I thought seeing as she suggested we break up so I can fool around..\n\nI'm really confused about this whole situation and just want some outsiders' opinions to sort of guide me through it.", "summary": "Girlfriend suggested we \"take a break\" so that I could get with who I want just for the weekend and has left me very confused."}
{"id": "t3_1npgmj", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20M] I may have just lost a friend [20F].", "post": "A little backstory from a post about a month ago \n\nSo here is what's going on now. About a week ago, she took a break from her boyfriend. She came to my house and we fooled around for about 6 hours. It was amazing, but I feel like a horrible person for doing it. She says she loves me more than anything and wishes we were together, but she's too afraid to leave the position she's in now because it's \"too risky\". Now she's done with her break and she wants to stay with her boyfriend. I love her so much, I just don't know what to do anymore. I told her that it would be difficult being friends because at the end of the day, she'll be going home to her boyfriend and that's going to break my heart. Sorry guys, I feel like a total bitch looking for advice because I usually stray from this kind of drama that I somehow got sucked into. I just don't know what to do anymore. I guess I'm just hoping that thing don't work out for them, and that makes me feel incredibly selfish. Anyways, thanks for anything.", "summary": "The love of my life is dating my friend and chose him over me despite having a stronger relationship than him. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3sxs3k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21 M] My friend won't hang out with me because she is on makeup break? [23 F]", "post": "She is a cosmetologist. She wears a HEAVY amount of makeup. All the time. Recently she started breaking out in acne, that is what she told me. She told me she cried for an hour because of it and she has never had a break out this bad before. So she is on a \"Makeup Break\" I asked her how long and she said a week.\n\nI asked to hang out and she said she couldn't because of makeup break. I told her I didn't care if she didn't wear makeup, she said that I would care. I don't know, our friendship is just platonic right now,\n\nSo now I feel kind of hurt and weird. Is this even normal? For a girl to not see her friends without wearing make up first? What am I supposed to say? I'm kind of upset actually, I feel played with.", "summary": "Female friend won't hang out with me because she can't wear makeup right now because of acne or something, taking a makeup break. I'm confused."}
{"id": "t3_52gr1m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [23/m] is a picky eater and I'm [23/f] sick of it.", "post": "My boyfriend is a horrendously picky eater, both when we cook at home (most of the week) and when we go out (once or twice a week). He'll eat only white chicken meat, steak, pizza, spaghetti or a hamburger. Green beans are the only veggie he'll touch, and he has to be vigorously persuaded to eat any fruits, after which he expects to be praised as if he's done something wonderful.\n\nI'm an adventurous eater, and I work out hard during the day so that I can enjoy something I like for dinner. I love sushi, curries, gyro, pho, ramen, etc etc. Boyfriend won't even try any of these, for a plethora of excuses.\n\nI'm fine if he contains his picky eating to himself, but I'm sick of always going to his restaurants because I can find something I'll tolerate on their menus, and he won't go near any of mine. I want to be able to cook more adventurously at home (usual menu is chicken breast, rice or potatoes, green beans- BORING) without him whining and just eating a muffin or frozen pizza instead. I'm worried about his health and I resent not being able to do something I enjoy.\n\nIn the past, we've had very nonconstructive conversations about this. He got defensive, I got snarky. I need a way to reframe the issue, maybe some scripting help or practical compromises. Any ideas?", "summary": "boyfriend is a picky eater, I like a bunch of foods he doesnt. I usually let him have his way, but I'm over that. Help please?"}
{"id": "t3_ldnps", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "G/F refuses to move away from the city ever", "post": "My current g/f (she is 24) of 5 years and I (am 28 turn 29 in Jan) are living together. She works in the financial business at a call center and I work at a engineering company designing and building plants. I am a recent grad and got a job here in the town she grew up in and where we both went to college. We have been talking and I told her at some point I will prob wind up in the field or will move to a job site for awhile to gain experience to advance. She straight up said if your career means that much to you then go. She refuses to leave our area b/c of family. I then asked what if I go to field and come home every other weekend or every weekend if it is close enough (a bunch of people do that in our office) and she said no, she doesn't do long distance relationships. She called me selfish and I should want to be with her. I tried to explain at some point I will need to go to advance my career and I cant work at the same job and the same area my entire life and her response was just find another job in the area. She responded we can't just get married and buy/build a house and just turn around and sell it, that it makes no sense we might as just rent. I am not looking to move nor do I want to really atm. If I do I want to come back to the area eventually. I just feel if the opportunity for a better job or good experience was come along in a different area i should be able to take it or at least discuss the options at the time and have the ability to maybe take it but she is basically say no now. I know it is kind of hard to play the what if game but feel this is something we would talk about before we think of marriage which i have been thinking about.", "summary": "oneday my job i might need to move for work but g/f basically says i refuse to leave the area no matter what."}
{"id": "t3_4f9cnh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27F] told my younger sister [18F] to break up with her toxic boyfriend [19M]. My parents are now mad at me for \"breaking up the family.\"", "post": "I could tell from the start my sister's new boyfriend was a toxic individual. I wanted to tell her to break up with him, but I was scared to do so. I built up the courage to tell her after 3 months. She was just in a fight with him, and I told her to break up with him because he was a toxic person, and she was just starting to realize that. The next day, she broke up with him.\n\nWhen she told our parents that she broke up with him and I had really helped her, our mom was *furious.* She went off on me and yelled at me for about 10 minutes because I had \"broken up the family\" and that her boyfriend had been a perfectly nice person and was not toxic. Our father was on her side, but my 4 siblings (including the sister mentioned) were on my side. They said they had realized he was a toxic person, but hadn't spoken up.\n\nNow, I don't know what to do about my parents. They're threatening to go no contact with me because I'm an embarrassment to the family. Do you have any advice for me, Reddit?", "summary": "I told my sister to break up with her toxic boyfriend. My parents are now mad at me for \"breaking up the family.\""}
{"id": "t3_3dnykk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "25[m] Need advice on dipping in family biz ink.", "post": "For the record i've always been against doing this for obvious reasons.\n\nAnyways- there's an employee at my Family business  that i've had my eye on for some time. I don't work there but I come in on a regular basis.\n\nI want to ask her out but never do because:\n\n*1. she's busy doing her job whenever i'm there\n\n*2. I can't find an opportune private moment that won't make it fucking awkward for her and potentially embarass her (and me)\n\nMy question is.. would it be completely bush league of me to ask her out over a FB message?\n\n... I have always been an in person type of guy but I literally cannot find an appropriate time to ask her out for a drink.", "summary": "Want to ask employee from family biz out for a drink, Can't find appropriate opportunity to do it, considering asking her out over private FB message but am conflicted over it being so informal"}
{"id": "t3_2dqqbx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 1.5. Today, my girlfriend is modeling for the first time. How do I remain supportive without letting my jealousy ruin our relationship?", "post": "A bit of background on myself: I am a photographer by trade.  Somewhat as a joke, my girlfriend has always playfully been very against my taking photos of her.  It hurt and annoyed me at first when she played coy, but eventually I just stopped trying to involve her in my work.   \n\nShe is a very attractive girl - to the point of being openly approached constantly whenever she's out at no matter the setting (work, etc).  That said, she grew into her good looks and somewhat enjoys the attention she gets now.  Recently, she was asked to model for a clothing company startup she is a fan of.  Excited with the idea, she agreed.\n\nAt the moment, I am a mixture of supportive, jealous, insecure, and unsure.  The photographer inside me is against the idea because it's unpaid and I feel they're taking advantage of her.  The boy in me is jealous that she is so enamored with the idea and was so resistive to me (taking photos) initially.  I'm also just not that comfortable with my girlfriend choosing to be ogled by people online - perhaps a bit possessive/insecure, but I just don't love the idea of her half naked all over the internet and lastly... The boyfriend in me is being supportive and pushing her to do something she wants to even though I really feel bad about it.  \n\nI don't want to push her away and I want to see her happy.  How do I deal with my own insecurities and jealousy with this situation.  She's at the shoot right now and having a great time.  I'm at home in knots.", "summary": "My girlfriend is modeling today for the first time and really enjoying it.  I'm insecure and jealous because she's never shown the desire to do that with me and I feel uncomfortable with her choice to be ogled."}
{"id": "t3_36xvrk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] and my girlfriend [16 F] are going to sleep together for the first time. I'm anxious.", "post": "I'm a very anxious person in general, sometimes to an obsessive degree.\n\nWe've been together for over two years without having sex. At first she was too young (14) and now she wants a time when she is free of stress so she can be relaxed and not have to worry about anything else. The.. event itself will take place in about a month, after she finishes her exams. We've considered it now and then through the time we've been together but always decides to wait.\n\nNow it isn't being put off any longer. And, while it has been a TORTUROUS wait for me (worth it, to be with someone like her), it suddenly seems... rather sudden and immediate. \n\nGod knows I want to, and I definitely don't want to wait any longer, but at the same time I don't know how I'm going to be fully ready by the time it happens. \n\nI understand on an intellectual level that it is not that big a deal. Just sex, right? But emotionally it seems like a great deal more than that.\n\nAnd I know that it is for her. We're very open in discussing these matters. To her this is a really big deal; her virginity is something she can only ever give to one person and she wants it to be meaningful. It's sharing a more intimate part of herself than she ever has before.\n\nI understand and even agree with her. But that kind of adds pressure to the situation. I don't want to screw up and make her first time something she doesn't want to remember. And I don't know if worrying about it will just make it more likely to happen.\n\nI'm not even sure what I'm asking here. As much a chance to just talk about it as possible,I guess; my only confidante aside from my girlfriend is asexual, and as such she can't give much input here. But do I really have anything to worry about? Just how badly CAN I screw this up? And is there anything I definitely, definitely shouldn't do?", "summary": "there's a lot of buildup and pressure surrounding my first time and I don't know how to think about the situation."}
{"id": "t3_4jcq48", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] have deep feelings for my friend[23 M]. How to get over them and is it possible to still be friends?", "post": "I met him in October last year at university. We immediately clicked and since we have the same major, we took the same classes. I think he liked me at first, he would text me all the time and ask me to hang out on weekends. He is a very nice guy and I really enjoyed his company and looked forward to getting his texts everyday.\n\nAt the beginning of this quarter, things started to change. He started texting me less and no longer asked me how my day was and that's when I realized that I have feelings for him, and it shocked me how intense they were. I was thinking about him 24/7 and it affected me in a negative way. I no longer wanted to hang out with anyone, I got bad grades in all my classes and I just slept all the time. The texting almost stopped right now. I still see at school everyday and we spend our breaks together, he's nice when I'm with him and still teases me and jokes around.\n\nRight now, I don't know what to do and I'm not sure what he's thinking, I sometimes wonder if he just doesn't want spend our break time with me but is too nice to say so and I wonder if I pushed him away when I was having a hard time controlling my feelings when I'm around him by being cold and ignoring him. I want to stop thinking about him and move on. I really want to focus on school and get good grades since is not too late.\nDistancing myself from him is not an option at this point since we are taking the same classes. Also, I can never be in a relationship with him because of some circumstances. How do I stop being so miserable all the time? How do I stop waiting for his texts when I know he won't be sending me anything? Is it possible to get over him and still be friends? He hasn't done anything wrong and it doesn't feel right to be mean to him. Please help me!!", "summary": "I have feelings for a friend that I see everyday and they're affecting me in negative way. How do I control/stop these feelings without losing him?"}
{"id": "t3_12ztm8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My roommate has told me many disgusting band camp stories and so I'm curious: What are YOUR most horrifying stories from band and/or camp?", "post": "The main story that stuck with me involved my roommate and this guy that everyone in the band absolutely hated. For the life of me, I can't remember his name, so I'll call him \"Dave\". Dave apparently was an asshole to everyone and if there's anything to take away from this story, it's to not piss off band geeks.\n\nMy roommate's high school band was traveling by bus to a school in a different city for a competition. Dave had been messing with the people in band all week and as a band member himself, would be accompanying them to the competition. The bus ride was going to take around 4-5 hours and a group of trombone guys (including my roommate) decided it would be a great opportunity to get back at Dave. They sneaked into the band room, opened Dave's trombone case, and stole his mouthpiece.\n\nOne by one, the guys took turns jacking off into it. One of the them stuck it up his ass. Another pissed on it.\n\nThey made sure to wipe off the more obvious fluids, but didn't rinse the thing out. Instead, they stuck it back into Dave's case and watched as it was loaded into the storage section under the bus. There, the mouthpiece sat. Did I mention it was May? It was fucking May. For 5 hours, that mouthpiece sat roasting in shit and piss and semen like a fetish-loving prostitute in the trunk of a car. When the bus finally stopped, Dave took it out and played his trombone as if not a single thing was wrong.", "summary": "Roommate and his friends subjected a mouthpiece to the bodily excrement trifecta and left it to roast in the summer heat for 5 hours."}
{"id": "t3_er6tz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My thoughts on my own Christmas this year - am I doing the right thing?", "post": "Firstly - sorry for the 'downer' on a day like today - just really on my mind.\n\nWell Reddit, another year has come around and its Christmas - I work in retail so I'm surrounded by people that are talking about doing everything with the family and friends, buying presents for everyone, so on and so fourth.\n\nWith my career, and it being my own choice, I sometimes have to move to different places to manage stores, its still a yes/no choice but to move up its something that I have to do and shouldn't really say NO to, as its something that is somewhat required of you (see of it as, what are you willing to give up to get a chance of a life time) - although I'm starting to think just how much of my own life am I giving up to chase my dreams?\n\nI don't live with my family anymore, and I'm roughly 1200km from them (not much, I know, but we are talking about $600 in flights, possibly more for return) - my girlfriend is now even further away, and shits getting pretty tough there too with the distance and not being able to be there for each other.\n\nI left most of my friends, and rarely hear from them now (could be partly my fault not speaking to them either, but frankly I'm pretty busy most of the time and we just end up drifting apart).\n\nSo reddit, without giving you the entire life story, I ask for your guidance:\n\nMy job could potentially give me (X) amount of money to live comfortably for the rest of my life, filling a dream that I fill I would love to achieve - but in the process losing the closeness of friends, family and loved ones - but possibly getting them back in the end?\n\nOr do I get out now, move back to family and loved ones (in an area possibly without as good job prospects and in some ways settle for 'second best' or have to work even harder to get where I want to be?\n\nIf you have any questions, I'll try to answer them - I mean, I don't have anything to do today on Christmas, right? I'm alone and self reflecting!", "summary": "I'm doubting my choices and its not even the new year - stay with my current job (possibly dreams/aspirations), potentially lose loved ones/family OR leave all that and go back to them"}
{"id": "t3_2hwy2t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my wife [27 F] of several months, and a tax disagreement?", "post": "I'll do my best to keep this concise.\n\nMy wife has a chronic illness. As a result she doesn't have a 9-5 job, doesn't earn much money, and really, really needs health insurance.\n\nOur state didn't expand Medicaid, and my employer offers health insurance but it would cost an arm and a leg to cover her with it. She qualifies for subsidies on the market as long as we can bust our asses and keep her income high enough.\n\nThe trick is she would lose those subsidies if she has any other way to get coverage - i.e. my employer. Long story short, she's going to lie on her taxes and file as \"Single\" and obviously I have to as well. \n\nI am incredibly uncomfortable with lying on my taxes but both she and her mom (who was, to be fair, a tax attorney) think it should be okay for one year. I would imagine most people wouldn't lie to say they were *single* on their taxes, so I guess there's that.\n\nI don't see a realistic way for us to afford coverage through my employer, unfortunately. I'd love for this to be a \"put my foot down\" moment but if that results in her losing coverage I don't think I can justify it.\n\nWe all have to make sacrifices in marriage ... is this a reasonable one for me to make? I guess worst-case scenario is we get caught and busted for a large fine. Which puts us back on square one (or square 0.5, due to the fines ...)", "summary": "I have to lie on my taxes for my wife. Is this just a matter of sacrificing for the wife, or should I put my foot down? Anyone else (come on throwaways) had to do something similar?"}
{"id": "t3_19307c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F24] am not looking for a relationship, but am infatuated with my coworker [M26]", "post": "I [F24] moved overseas for work about 18 months ago, breaking up with my boyfriend of 5 years to do so. I'm convinced the break up was the right thing to do, but it's hit us both very hard and I don't feel ready to move on yet.\n\nWhen I started working at my new job, I immediately noticed that one of my coworkers, Mark [M26] was pretty cute, but didn't give it much more thought. The two of us are the youngest members of our team by a significant margin. We happen to come from the same country, he's been here for about 3 years. There aren't many young single women in my industry, so for the first few months I was swamped with suitors, but Mark (as is proper for a coworker) never showed any sign of interest.\n\nAbout 6 months ago my team moved offices, and I had to start sharing an office with Mark. Naturally we started to casually chat more once we were crammed in the same 12 square yards for 9 hours a day, and I've slowly started to develop an irrational infatuation with him. I get unjustifiably upset if he calls in sick for the day, or even just shows up a little late in the mornings. He's perfectly friendly with me, but has never shown any sign of wanting to have any social interaction outside of a work context (I do meet with other coworkers outside of work sometimes). He's straight but been single the whole time I've been working here.\n\nThis infatuation is stupid, I'm not ready to start dating again, I know that coworkers are totally a no-go zone, he's shown no interest in me, and I don't actually think we'd even be particularly compatible. I haven't let my infatuation get in the way of my work, if anything I'm working longer hours because he tends to leave later than I would otherwise. I know I have to get over him, but I just don't know how to go about it since rationally I don't want to look for or get into any kind of non-platonic relationship with any guy right now. Advice, please!", "summary": "I'm obsessed with my countryman office buddy, but don't actually want to date anyone right now. How do I get over him?"}
{"id": "t3_drh8z", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm great at small talk, but how do I move past that?", "post": "Reddit, I'm great on first and second dates when a lot of it is asking questions and getting to know about the other person. In fact, I love meeting new people because I'm pretty decent at small talk. After the first or second date though, I seem to run into a wall about what to talk about. \n\nIs this a problem of just 'chemistry' (fuck, how does it work)? I'm great hanging out with friends and with girls that are in that damned friend zone. I just can't seem to make it work on a one-on-one setting with a girl I'm interested in, in a date situation. I'm just wondering if anyone had any tips out there. Thanks!\n\n(Note: I have been in relationships before (21 years old), but I feel that this seems to be part of the reason why they don't go anywhere and just kind of fizzle out.)", "summary": "How do I come up with stuff to talk about when dating a girl once all the small talk introductory stuff is out of the way?"}
{"id": "t3_47md7h", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Put a deposit for a Kitten way back, found out I'm allergic to Cats. Advice?", "post": "Okay I believed that I was not allergic to anything after being told by my parents and everyone in my family that I do not have allergies and had tests done.\n\nI put down a deposit for a Ragdoll Kitten, $350 for something not even born yet.\nNow I just found out I'm allergic to Cat Dander. \n\nI don't know what to do. I want to get a refund but I'm first gonna ask you guys and do research. Should I get a Ragdoll even if I am allergic? I've heard all stuff about them being great cats for people with allergies and I heard the exact opposite as well. I know Cat Dander comes from saliva. \n\nI fell in love with Ragdoll Cats so this is just difficult for me to come to terms with. \n\nI just need extra insight and advice.", "summary": "Put a deposit for a future Ragdoll Kitten. Tested positive for Cat allergies. Should I keep the kitten, or get a refund?"}
{"id": "t3_2p0kd7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Difficult situation. I (m29) am in love with one of my best friends (f28).", "post": "Here's my situation:\n\nI am in love with my good friend and coworker. We've both worked at the same ad agency in NYC for several years and over that time have developed a really solid friendship. We often talk, half-jokingly, about how we should travel together. Now there is a chance that our company might send us both abroad to work on a project together. I know she also really values our friendship, but I can't tell if her feelings go any deeper than that, like mine do.\n\nThings are a little complicated by the fact that as long as I've known her she's had a long-term boyfriend, except for a short period last year when they took a \"break\".  It's also complicated because we're all part of the same friend group so I often have to see them together, which is usually torture for me. I'm not exactly buddies with her bf, but we have many friends in common. \n\nSo, what do I do?  Do I just tell her how I feel and risk alienating myself from our group and possibly losing her as a friend (while still having to work with her)?  Do I wait and hope that things eventually fizzle out for good with her bf? Or do I just accept that I might never be with her and try to enjoy the strong friendship we have.\n\nThanks in advance for any advice.", "summary": "In love with my good friend and coworker, who has been unavailable as long as I've known her. If I tell her how I feel, I risk losing friends, including her."}
{"id": "t3_12we4d", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My 12 year old brother recently confessed that he was molested by his doctor. My mother does not want to press charges because she doesn't want to put him through any more trauma; I think it is better to deal with it now. Reddit, how can I convince my mom to press charges against this doctor?", "post": "Throwaway acct.\n\n6 months ago, my younger brother explained to my mom that he found the doctor that he had his sports physical with \"creepy\" and that he didn't want to go back to him again.  He explained that the doctor had touched him for a long time, but my mom thought that it was just his reaction to having his first physical without her in the room.  6 months later, after learning of similar charges being brought against the doctor by others, my mom talked to him and he confessed that he knew what the doctor had done was wrong, and that it had really scared him.  I won't go into any details, but what he described was indisputably molestation.  My mom is afraid to press charges because she doesn't want him to have to describe the situation any more than he already has.  Personally, I think that not dealing with this now is going to really fuck him up down the road.  Reddit, do you side with my mom, or me on this?  If there are any professional lawyers, psychologists, etc that have dealt with this, what is the right decision right now?", "summary": "Younger brother molested by doctor.  My mother thinks we should shove it under the rug; I think that dealing with it now and pressing charges will be best for him long term."}
{"id": "t3_17yxf0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you deal with people who are trying to have a life competition with you?", "post": "I am in college, and am a photographer, I had this girl last year who I became friends with because we were both into photography, she asked me many questions, tips, advice all that stuff because I had been doing it longer and I was completely ready to share everything with her, while not really gaining anything in return accept a kind of satisfaction from someone wanting my help.  \n\nShe now constantly talks down to me, not just about photography but about everything, and literally just treats me like shit unless it suits her to do otherwise (basically never) I have a hard time being a bitch, and I always end up just being nice when I want to stand up for myself.  She has literally shoved everything about her life that I don't have in my face her family/friends/home/money/boyfriend (she has rich parents/family who have bought her every piece of equipment she has and paid her way through school, this only bothers me because I have worked very hard for what little I have, and she always whines about money, while I often am broke and rarely bring up financial problems)  \n\nShe is also (after having done photography for only 6 months) getting paid work, I have yet to have this, and it really is sheer luck but the very first \"collaboration\" we did together she had a model and invited me along (all fine) I said \"hey I know this awesome spot, and I have all this paint, and here is some awesome stuff we could do!\" then she posted all her photos before I did and didnt mention me so everyone thinks I copied her, and it has worked that way for many things to follow and I am just wondering how you people deal with being enraged at someone who you cannot avoid, also I think if I blatantly stop talking to her the rest of the people around us will think I am the one being a bitch, which also bothers me, what do I do?", "summary": "Competitive bitch used me for inspiration, and now treats me like a follower and is very spiteful and condescending what would/have you done/ what should I do? "}
{"id": "t3_1m4zs3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend[18/F] of 1 month, told me[19/M] that she doesn't believe in love, but I do!", "post": "So I've known this girl for about 3 months. She blew me away from the minute I first met her in my friends house. We hung out a lot (4/5 nights a week) over summer, just as friends. I asked her out about 1+1/2 months ago and things are going good!\n\nBut there's one thing that has been bugging me. She openly admitted to me about 2 months ago that she doesn't believe in love. She said she thought she was in love in a previous relationship, but now realizes she wasn't at all.\n\nThis is bugging me because I know I'm very capable of loving another person. I'm worried that if I grow to love her after a while, she won't feel the same.\n\nIs this an opinion that a lot of people have about love? Do you think I can change her opinion? Or do you think I'm wasting my time and I'm asking for my heart to be broken?\n\n.. I'd rather clear this in my mind while I'm still in the early stages..", "summary": "Girlfriend doesn't believe in love, I do. What happenes if I love her and she doesn't change her view?"}
{"id": "t3_2c9c6z", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (27F) have a question for you about the landmarks in your relationship(s).", "post": "*Not sure if this belongs here, but /r/relationships does not allow general questions, so....help me out please!*\n\nI've been dating my SO (34M) for about a month so I don't need to worry overly much about this right away, but I like to be prepared. I'm looking for the time frames that you experienced with landmarks in your relationships, to give me a ballpark. Examples include:\n\n- When did you exchange keys?\n- When did you first say \"I love you\"?\n- When did you start to feel like your respective homes were a place you could \"feel at home\", i.e. you would do dishes or help with chores even though the place wasn't your own?\n- When did you start farting around each other?\n\nThings like that. What do you consider landmarks? When did they happen?\n\nWe spend most of our time at my place for convenience and he seems to fit in to my home nicely. He is comfortable making breakfast or doing dishes and has offered to help with other chores if I happen to need to do them when he's over. So far I've turned down his offer to help with other chores, but I do appreciate the gesture.\n\nI have a history of moving in too soon, so I know I need to wait QUITE a while before I ever even consider that move. Like, over a year. At least. I just don't know how the rest of it should/could play out. I do expect some widely varied answers, so any details as to why you think it was good timing/later than normal/sooner than normal would be much appreciated.\n\nWe started farting around each other almost immediately. What a relief!", "summary": "What do you consider the landmarks in your relationship(s) and when did they happen? Do you think they happened right on time or sooner/later than average? Why?"}
{"id": "t3_28b1cb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I love my wife [29/f] but I feel like something is missing [28/m].", "post": "I have been married for about 3 years now and I absolutely love my wife. She has been the best partner I have ever had. We have had ups and downs but we always seem to work things out and we have a healthy sex life. Things are going well but I just can not seem to shake the feeling that I want more. I have lived a prim and proper, mostly conservative lifestyle up until my later years in college. I got a taste of different types of lifestyles and I have always been amazed by them. My wife was the typical break away who decided to distance herself from her family and enjoy any experience she could. There have been tales of hitchhiking with hippys and free love and all that. She has a view of people that I never had (I have been fairly cynical) and it has enabled her to meet some very interesting people from all walks of life and allowed her to make very intimate connections with these people. Well she eventually met me and she changed my outlook on the world. \n\nWe were married right after we both graduated from college and we have taken up a fairly traditional lifestyle. She has mostly transitioned away from the past. After I had a brief chance to experience what she had experienced and after all of her stories, I was a bit jealous. I feel like our marriage has cut me off from having those intimate experiences with anyone other than her. There is a sexual aspect to this but it is also about simple intimacy. Neither of us hinder each other in the formation of new friendships but sometimes I wish we could have more. We have briefly discussed additions in the bedroom but I have never been sure if she was actually interested or if it was just her indulging me. Plus, neither of us would know where to start. I have not really discussed this with her because I don't want to hurt her and she has a way of avoiding discussions like this. \n\nI have maintained the status quo and told myself that those times were over. I thought I would move on from it but even several years later I can not shake the feeling that I have repressed something within myself.", "summary": "Loving and amazing wife who has had more interesting life experiences and intimate interactions, and I cannot get past the desire to have those experiences as well."}
{"id": "t3_399w5p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23/f] have been seeing someone [26/M] for a couple months and not sure how to move forward.", "post": "I've been talking to someone for about two months now, maybe less. I'm not the best at dating and what not, such as knowing what happens. Especially online dating. We have met already and have hung out multiple times as well as gone on a date or two. Our hang outs have been dinner, movies, and other random stuff, but we've only really been on one or two dates. The other times were with other people, so it wasn't really one-on-one. I've slept over his place a couple times, but have only had sex once. We used to talk every day, but more recently it has been every other day or every couple days. Which is fine, we have busy lives. He especially has a very busy life. \n\nHowever, I'm not sure how dating really goes. I'm not really sure what he wants, nor am I sure how to bring it up in a conversation. I deactivated my dating profile a few weeks ago because I came back to over 100 messages one day and there was no one I was really into. Also, I was a bit hung up on this guy. I recently just reactivated it, due to boredom and unsure if this guy was into me, and I've noticed he's online almost every night. I'm very much into him, but not sure if he feels the same. I'm not sure when in the \"talking\" stage, I bring this up. It seems like he is into me and I sort of had a conversation with him the other night where he said he wasn't interested in a booty call. \n\nAm I overthinking it or should I just let it happen and see where it takes me? Do you think I should bring it up? Do you think it's too early to think about this stuff? Give me your advice.\n\nI'm terrible at dating.", "summary": "Been talking to someone for a couple months. When's the best time to ask what they're really looking for or if they want to take things to a more serious level?"}
{"id": "t3_3mnppg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 F] with my dad [60 M]. Useless relationship.", "post": "Not sure if I posted in the right subreddit...\n\nI've always felt like my whole life that my dad has hated me and not wanted to be a part of my life.  I can't even \nsay, \"hi.\" to him without it being weird.  I have never had a full conversation with him.  When I was younger he \nwas an asshole to my mom to the point even family couldn't believe she put up with him.  Like, he's an arrogant \ndickhead.  He thinks he's fucking perfect and never makes mistakes.  He has no problem calling anyone stupid for \nany reason.  I'm 30.  I didn't live with my parents from 18 to 28.. Recently had to move back because I couldn't \nafford to live anywhere else.  It's so weird that we can't even say, \"hi\" but he'll gladly yell at me for random \nthings.  I asked my sister recently if she felt the same way as me and she did.  I also asked my mom if he even \nwanted children.  She said he did but I don't believe her.  I just feel like what the hell did I do to make you \nhate me??  I talk to friends about this weird relationship and actually have one that has a similar one but \neveryone else doesn't.  I still even try to do nice things for him!  Hate myself for that... so I stopped. \nIt's pretty pathetic, I'm trying to not even acknowledge him anymore.", "summary": "Am I the only one with this useless relationship?  What's the best way to handle it when you feel like your own father hates you?  I know that people have it way worse so should I even be concerned?"}
{"id": "t3_1xemcb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm leaving my boyfriend of three years because he refuses to flush the toilet and wash his hands.", "post": "My boyfriend and I are best friends, and I've never had stronger feelings for another individual. Three months ago we got a place together, and I'm already regretting it.\n\nThe burping, I can handle. The farting, I can live with. But I will no longer put up with his terrible hygiene (or lack of it). I constantly feel disgusted and uncomfortable in my own home. Every time I step into the bathroom, I get to see his bodily fluids in the toilet. And he never washes his hands, even after taking a shit, unless I tell him to. Like a three-year-old child, I have to tell him to wash his fucking hands, or else I refuse to let him touch me or come near me.\n\nI don't understand why it's so difficult to do. ~~If he really loved me, he'd want me to live in a comfortable and safe environment, right?~~ I've talked with him about it so many times that it's like he doesn't understand words (and he's not a stupid man; in fact, I'd consider him to be the most intelligent person I've met). He'll say \"okay\", the conversation will end, but then he'll \"forget\".", "summary": "Boyfriend won't wash his hands or flush after using the bathroom and doesn't care that it makes me feel disgusted, so I'm out."}
{"id": "t3_2ih04u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with my new friend/crush [31M] of one month, he has been showing obvious signs of interest towards me for the past month. Two days ago he told me he has a long-distance girlfriend. So confused, Reddit help!", "post": "A little background about myself: I have not been in a serious relationship since I was 21 and have only dated casually since then. I am open, available and looking for a more long-term relationship.\n\nAbout a month ago, I started hanging out with this guy who I've discovered to be the most caring, kind, and encouraging individual that's been in my life recently. Signs started to show early that there was some kind of attraction between us. Here are some things that have happened in the last month (some still happening):\n\n-prolonged eye contact and lots of easy, fun conversation\n-prolonged or tight hugging\n-after saying goodbye, our eyes often meet once more before departure (with smiles)\n-texting everyday starting in the morning and lasting into the evening\n-he has said things like \"you are the nicest person I have ever met\", \"I see you as one of the people who will always be in my life\"\n-while on a weekend trip with friends, he threw his arm around me while sleeping (multiple friends sharing a bed)\n-he said he would treat me to dinner (which he then turned into a group thing)\n\nA couple days ago he told me he would be gone the next week because he was going to see his girlfriend (who lives six hours drive away) and expressed that they have been having difficulties for the past six months due to the long-distance. I learned that they have been together for 3+ years. \n\nI love that he shows an interest in me but realistically I feel that it is unfair and that I'm being led on. I'm scared to say something because I don't want the attention to stop, but I know I am in a vulnerable position. I secretly want him to break up with his girlfriend. Reddit, any advice is welcome, please!", "summary": "Just found out the man I'm interested in, and thought was interested in me, has a girlfriend. What course of action do I take?"}
{"id": "t3_2hm109", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] and my boyfriend[29 F] of 1yr 9m, I don't see him as a lover anymore but I don't want to break his heart by leaving.", "post": "My boyfriend is lovely and quirky but for a few months now I have found it hard to be physically attracted to him. He makes me laugh and we have interesting conversations, but I now think of him as a close friend. \n\nHe has low self esteem when it comes to our relationship because I suspect his ex made him feel like he didn't deserve her. \n\nI couldn't tell you when I first felt the lack of attraction towards him or if there was some kind of moment that sparked this in me. He is the longest relationship I have had by just over a year. \n\nWhat makes it worse is we always blatantly talk about marriage and kids, so it's like we're already settled down. It's nice to be comfortable with someone as I've never really been good at making friends or even interact with the opposite sex.\n\nMy main fear is hurting him as I do love him, I just don't want to lie to him or to lead him on any further than I already have.", "summary": "Gorgeous human being that is my boyfriend will be hurt if I leave, how do I rekindle my sexual attraction or how do I leave?"}
{"id": "t3_2jz4xl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my co-worker [22M] - I made it awkward, any advice?", "post": "Got a new job. Trained with co-worker, we're friends, he's cool. Hang out sometimes. Drink after work with other co-workers. Briefly think he likes me. No idea if he does. Don't really entertain the thought. \n\nWork there for 3 weeks, briefly see co-worker daily, always nice interactions.\n\nCo-worker invites me over to hang and stay the night. That sounds like code to me, so I mentioned I thought he was cool and that I'm not keen on staying the night because seeing other guy. Never brought up this guy before. Pretty personal to be sharing at work, my dating escapades. Co-worker must not have figured it out or stalked me online enough.\n\nCo-worker is sad. Short sentences, suggests we don't hang out. Feel like I did something wrong. Mention the convo is weird, we \"reset\" and he invites me over again. This time another friend of his is coming. I've met him, we all get along very well. So everything is fixed right?", "summary": "Assumed my co-worker liked me, mentioned we couldn't date. I hope I didn't break a friendship. I totally get why girls like to be friends with gay guys."}
{"id": "t3_3zsmvm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (20sf) with smelly gym guys (20s? 30s? M) duration a couple of weeks.", "post": "I'm (20s f) a pretty avid runner. My apartment building has a small gym that I run at every day, the same time eacy night on week nights. I can't run outside as I am 9/10 on call for work and must be within 15 minutes of my laptop at all times. \n\nA couple of weeks ago 2 guys (20s? 30s?) started coming to this small gym at/slightly before the time I go. Great for them! Except they smell like sweaty funky taint marinated in ball funk. It's horrendous. I've seen people gag coming into the gym. Their miasma of stench is so pervasive you can almost taste it. Like I don't see how if you shower, launder your gym clothes, and wear deodorant you could possibly exude such a god awful BO fog. I suspect they don't do any of these things. \n\nIt's a small apartment gym. There's really no gym management to complain to. Would it be an asshole move to talk to them about this? I'm not generally good with people and I can't think of a non terrible way to tell these guys they fucking reek. I'm normally anti passive aggressive notes but would a note do it?", "summary": "2 new gym goers at my building's painfully small gym smell like raunchy rotten fromunda cheese, how to address their tremendous funk"}
{"id": "t3_ybil1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When does the guy stop paying for dinner?", "post": "I [27/M] recently got into a huge fight with my--now ex-- girlfriend [24/F].\n\nWe'd been dating for about 2 years at this point and I still largely pay for all of our meals as well as our apartment + utilities. I have a nice luxury loft apartment and she keeps a very small--think glorified storage closet--apt in a bad neighborhood. She literally never goes there except to pick up and drop off clothing because I don't have enough closet space for two people. She doesn't pay a penny to live in my apartment or drive my car (we split the gas costs even though she drives it 80% of the time for her work and I walk to work.)\n\nWe both have good jobs. I make about twice what she does, but I have crushing student debt that I'm trying to pay off as fast as possible. I pay off about $3.5K of student debt a month, which really cuts into my cash flow, as you can imagine. She has about 1/10 the student debt I have.\n\nI recently started suggesting that we split our food bills more evenly. I suggested that she could pay for her own meals and I'd pay for mine. Obviously we'd still go on dates and I'd pay for her meals, but on a day to day basis, I suggested that we split the food costs.\n\nWe ended up getting into a huge fight and then lots of old, old stuff came out and we ended up breaking up.\n\nAt this point, the relationship issue is moot, but she was my first really seriously, long-term relationship.", "summary": "When do you think is OK for the couples to start splitting the bill? I don't know if I was out of line or not."}
{"id": "t3_490qg9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[16/m] How should I approach this girl? [16/f]", "post": "Let's start with background information about this girl\n\nThere's this girl that I really like. We're in science class and I have free period with her. I also sometimes pass by her on the way to class everyday. In Science Class, we show little glances of each other. I'd usually look at her for a few seconds and when she looks back, I either smile or look away. Sometimes we see each other and we both smile -- but it could be that she's talking with her friends as well.\n\nIn Gym class, we notice each other but she's with her group of friends and I'm with my own group of friends. Kind of hard to get to know her. Today in gym, we actually lined up against a wall and I was next to her. I was nervous since we were both talking to our own little group of friends I guess.\n\nWe always make eye contact in some way and I feel like she might show some interest in me too. I really have a huge crush on her. What's also interesting is that prom is coming up in about a month and I really want to ask her to it -- but then again I don't know her very well. Any advice?", "summary": "I really like this girl and I think she may like me back and I want to know how to approach her. How should I do it or do you guys have any advice"}
{"id": "t3_pobnw", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Stay put, or explore?", "post": "So, Reddit, I have a query for you. I am twenty years old, I have worked for the same company building high voltage electrical components for two years, I have good job security here, my employer, and the owner of the company like me personally, and are satisfied with my work. It's somewhat of a dead-end however. The best paid technicians, which is what I am, only make $35-40k a year. I could stay there and be financially secure, and make enough to get by, and facilitate some lesser hobbies of mine, but I don't think i'd ever truly be happy working there, as my co-workers make it somewhat high-stress. \n   I've lived in mid michigan my entire life, A close friend of mine has been on a few different internships to Aspen Colorado over the past few years, and she asked if i'd like to move out there with her. She says i'd love it, and quite frankly, I think that I would. I would love a fresh start in a new place, with new people, I'm a generally well liked enough person, and would have little to no problem making friends anywhere new. Should I seek employment there, and move on out to colorado on a whim, or should I stay here and continue to work for the same company, and not experience any other areas?\n     I would like advice on this from anyone who's ever made a big move, to a new place, with little or nothing to go on. I have about six thousand dollars in cash saved up, that I could use for the initial move and expenses, but is it worth it? Should I pick up and move half way across the country simply on a hunch? I know i'll never be truly happy at my current job, but for all I know this whole thing could go crashing down in flames, and I would be broke, jobless, and a hell of a long ways from home, and the little close family that I have. This plan has just started forming today, I apologize for the lengthy post.", "summary": "Should I stay at the same relatively dead-end job, or move across the country on a whim, to experience other things while i'm young?"}
{"id": "t3_2k3zi1", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Revenge on a New Roommate", "post": "I share an apartment with my boyfriend. There are two spare bedrooms which are a constant rotation of friends-in-need. We recently invited a friend to stay with us while she figures out what her next step in life is. \n\nNow, I want people to feel at home in my apartment, but she keeps moving things around so we can't find them, using things that aren't hers, and ruining our possessions. Her version of an apology is an explanation of her actions followed by, \"So I'm sorry if I am guilty, but I don't think I am.\"\n\nLast Sunday I got around to sorting through laundry she took it upon herself to wash. She ruined an expensive pair of fingerless mittens knit with alpaca yarn and she lost a prized shawl, gifted to me for being the Maid of Honor in my best friend's wedding this past summer. When I explained as much, and how I knew she was the guilty party, she insisted it wasn't possible she was at fault, and if she was, I shouldn't be upset with her for things she did weeks ago. \n\nYou can understand, I'm pretty annoyed and generally disinterested in her disrespect. \n\nSo I'm keeping all of her clothes that were mixed in my laundry that she washed. I won't even wear any of it, but if she feels no remorse losing my shawl, I don't feel too guilty either.", "summary": "New roommate washed my laundry without asking \"to help me out\" and is unapologetic when I point out that she ruined some irreplaceable items, so I'm keeping her clothes that got mixed into the load."}
{"id": "t3_r5vnj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have I been friendzoned?", "post": "Before I begin,  let me tell you that I am a girl to avoid any confusion later. Also,  this is the boy I consider(ed?) my best friend. \n\nSo me and this boy have been friends for 6 years and we're really close. We are both seniors in high school. He asked me out in October and dumped before Christmas. He gave me reasons like \"I don't want to be in a relationship that will have to end when we part for college\", \"I'm done with high school dating\", \"I need to focus on myself right now\" and the infamous \"I just don't want to ruin our friendship\". As much as it sucked to hear,  I accepted it. He kept sending me messages about how much he wanted me but couldn't have me. Fast forward to yesterday when he tells me he's dating someone. An ex-girlfriend. What?We still hang out and talk like we did before we were dating.", "summary": "Dumped by best friend/ex-boyfriend because he \"doesn't want any more relationships\", and dates ex-girl friend soon after. "}
{"id": "t3_3seooh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My BF [29 M] who has a history of abortions, told me [25 F], his GF of 6 months, that he no longer wants to have sex due to his fear of getting me pregnant.", "post": "This weekend my boyfriend confessed that the reason why we haven't had sex in a couple weeks is that 'when things start going well' he ruins it by getting the girl pregnant.\n\nI am a very sexual person and if I had it my way, I'd have sex everyday, multiple times a day. So when he drops this bomb, I really don't know how to take it. I take the pill religiously, however we do not wear condoms. \n\nHe has always been very upfront about his past --- including the abortions that he's had with multiple exes. However, when he told me that he doesn't want to have sex until we're married and ready to have kids, I was taken aback.\n\nI want to be there for my BF and support him in anyway possible. Is there anything that can help him with the guilt and anxiety that he's feeling? Have you ever experienced this personally? Any advice would be appreciated. \n\nThank you!", "summary": "BF [who has a history of abortions with exes] doesn't want to have sex until married due to his fear of getting me pregnant. Any experience or advice on how I can help my man out would be appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_1kx1tq", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Reddit. I'm a 29 year old girl from the UK whose long term relationship has just ended. Where the hell do I even start dating?", "post": "I was in a relationship with the same guy for long time years. We were never suited. Made a massive mistake, we broke up. Lost all but two friends who are already in relationships and settled. That was three months ago.\n\nI don't want to pick up guys in bars, I hate clubs. I work with older women that are settled with families, babies and belong to nappy clubs or whatever parents do.\n\nOnline dating seems good but also from old work friends experiences it can be tedious. I'm willing to give it a go despite this but have no idea what to look out for. I also don't know where to meet single people in real life.\n\nAlthough both my exes have told me I'm pretty, I really don't think I am so there the whole self esteem thing. I'm friendly and flirty, but would wait for a sign someone liked me. So if I were sat in a bar I wouldn't just walk up to a strange guy and give him my number. Once I know someone I've got no problems with making moves. The thought of speed dating fills me with fear.", "summary": "Was in a relationship for years. Now single. Feel old. Weird mix of shy yet flirty. No single friends. Where do I start?"}
{"id": "t3_q0ts5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I've been friendzoned by the only girl I've ever considered to be marriage material. What do I do?", "post": "So here's how it is: We met in high school. Became friends. Dated briefly in Year 12, but it didn't work out because we were young and I was kind of stupid. \n\nSince then we've always been close, despite living 3 hours away from each other. Over about 4 years, I have had spouts of falling in love with her again, only to give up after always being friendzoned.\n\nNow I should be clear: in the past this girl has always been a bit insecure, and she dated plenty of boys to feel better about herself. After she woke up and realised how unhealthy that was, she made a decision to be single for at least a year. Now, she's happy with herself, because she took steps to change her life (yep. she's a keeper.)\n\nSo here's where I'm at now: we're both single, and we both enjoy that for now. But we're also really, REALLY close. I am crazy about her, but I have no idea whether I should give up and drift apart, or whether this could turn into a relationship in the future.", "summary": "I am friendzoned by the girl of my dreams, who wants to be single for a while . Should I cut loose from her, or wait for a chance at a future with her?"}
{"id": "t3_151e86", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Feeling a bit under appreciated. How do I hint to him?", "post": "So my SO and I have exchanged Christmas gifts quite early this year. I was pretty damn excited about him opening the gifts I got him -- all wrapped and tied with a bow and shit. \nWell, he pressured me to open mine. He told me to close my eyes. And at this moment, I'm all excited and shit. Then, he puts my hands around it. I open my eyes and its a little bottle of Honey Jack. Now, I love alcohol as much as the next person, but my heart just fell. I had gotten him something.. more sentimental. \nI got him this awesome Indiana Jonesy leather covered flask and a nice bottle of Abercromie & Fitch's Fierce cologne.\nWell he opened his gift tonight,  and to see his face light up made me feel so happy. But I couldn't help but feel disappointed and not as appreciated. I'm really not a naggy, whiny SO. But this feeling leaves me a little sad and unimportant.  \nBtw, we've been kinda together for a littler over a year.\nWhat should I do? Should I tell him straight up? If I do and he gets a gift, ill feel like it's only because I told him and that would just defeat the purpose.", "summary": "SO and I exchanged gifts. Mine was more sentimental, his a bottle of alcohol. Feeling under appreciated. If I tell him how I feel, how do I do it?"}
{"id": "t3_mor78", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My wife of three months threatened to move out.", "post": "Backstory: Been with her for about 4 years, things were great.  3 months ago we get married. We both work a lot, opposite schedules, and rarely see each other.  We bought a farm together, and have been settling in there too. Gradually she has withdrawn to the point of frigidity, and basic intimacy, holding hands, kissing, smiling. She comes home exhausted and sits there, at times I have to wrestle basic sentences out of her.  She says it's stress from work, and not to worry. I started picking up her end of basic work around the house and farm to help her out with stress. Still though whenever I try to do anything special, or social with her she always resists it, with rules, stipulations, or being negative, and an overall close-minded downer. Not her personality at all, but there it is time and time again. Conversely, she also will go and hang out with her friends over night regularly with carefree ease.  \n\nYesterday, as I serve her breakfast she says that, she doesn't take care of me.\n\nWhenever we have time off she flees from my presence. Today, Thanksgiving was no different.  She talks about driving over an hour away to her friends McMansion for a Walmart thanksgiving. I reminded her of years past when we have done that and she ended up being exhausted at the end of the day, she just got off a 15 hour shift. She also never framed it within the context of me coming along, and left me saying she was only going to be there a few hours. \n\nEven though she works at a grocery store and finds it impossible to bring food home. I went and got ingredients for at least a home cooked meal tonight.  Well I fell asleep, waiting for her. Got a text at one in morning saying that she was going midnight shopping.  So I finally called her out for being inconsiderate, and wish her a happy thanksgiving. \n\nShe now wants to come get her dog and leave. Then goes on (via text) about how she constantly fails and pretends to be happy around me for months, and she should just grab her dog, who is attached at the hip to my dog, and leave.  \n\nWTF?", "summary": "New wife has gone frigid, and seems to have regrets about life, as a result treats me like shit on a regular basis. Now wants to leave. "}
{"id": "t3_2ydv4z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] was with my new girlfriend [17F] and I couldn't perform when it counted.", "post": "So I haven't had the best luck with the ladies in my life, but I finally got a girlfriend and I'm crazy about her already. She's hot, smart, funny, everything I wanted in a girl. \n\nSo we're at my place and things get hot and heavy and we begin kissing and taking off clothes. First off, the furthest I've gotten with a girl before this was a blowjob when I was drunk at a party. Anyway, clothes are off and I'm hard as a rock waiting to go.\n\nI go down on her and I'm still rock hard and she climaxes and she's ready to return the favor to me. When she goes to blow me I start to go soft for some reason. I;m trying to concentrate on her and the generous, hot action she's doing but I just can't focus. I'm so confused and to compensate for that I go down on her again and the erection returns.\n\nShe says she wants me to fuck when I'm done going down on her and I get up to fuck her and I lose the hard on again. After that she was accepting and said we could wait (I'm still a virgin) for the next time we get together. I'm not sure why I kept losing the hard on when it mattered. If it changes anything I always over think things and I'm in my own head a lot. \n\nI talked to my best friend about and he said that I was probably nervous, but I'm completely ready to lose my virginity.", "summary": "Hooking up with new girlfriend, get hard when I go down on her but soft when she blows me or I'm about to fuck her. What is the possible reasoning behind this?"}
{"id": "t3_2bo1jo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] dating a [19 F] off and on for a year. Experiencing intense sadness and anxiety when away.", "post": "I've been dating a girl off and on for about one year now.  Things have been complicated for a variety of reasons but it's finally stable and we've been going at it for about a month.  \n\nI feel crazy for feeling this way and I acknowledge that, but I can't help it.  When we're hanging out it's fantastic, really fantastic for both of us.  Through everything we still have a stupid amount of fun together.  \n\nThe problem is that whenever I'm not hanging out with her, I become really sad and anxious thinking about the two of us and I can't stop it.  I assume it's a personal issue but I don't know how to fix it.", "summary": "I'm dating someone whom when I'm hanging out with have a fantastic time but when I'm away experience intense sadness and anxiety.  Has anyone dealt with this and how do I better the issue?"}
{"id": "t3_2xo7yl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Let me [20m] tell you a story and afterwards ask you this: is Paula [18f] being a bitch?", "post": "Let's say there's a guy called John [21m]. John kinda likes Paula and he wants her to think of him as a nice guy, get a good rep with her and such. John mentions Game of Thrones to her, and she says she's really into it, and also that she even read a few books before the show started airing.\n\nJohn gets excited, because them both like the same thing a lot! Then he offers to lend her the dvd box of the second season, to be a nice guy and maybe win her heart little by little. She accepts!\n\nPaula then proceeds to carry out the dvd box to another guy's house, watching the series with him as well as making out, on John's expenses. Is Paula a bitch?", "summary": "John lends Paula some dvds in the hopes of having her into him, and she instead goes out to watch them with another guy, making out with him. Is she being a bitch?"}
{"id": "t3_2w6vkr", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Thoughts on a prenup", "post": "I proposed last weekend. We've talked about it for a long time, I just finally got around to doing it. \n\nNow to the important stuff. We've been together for over 5 years, lived together for four. She's extremely responsible with her money, which is one of the reasons I haven't really thought I needed one. She pays me a set amount a month for rent, we just kind of split other things like groceries and such. I'd say I generally pay for going out to eat, vacations, etc. But I make a lot more than she does, so I don't have a problem with that. Even though we have separate accounts, I'd say we both consider things ours. I do own a house, but like I said, she's paying a little over a 3rd of that payment a month.\n\nI don't want to sound like I have love blinders on, I'm a pessimist generally, but I can't really see the need for one. If something ever did happen where we got divorced, which I really can't see but I know people change, should I still get one? Honestly if that happened, I know myself, and I'd be civil and fair about who get's what, I could guarantee that. I really couldn't see her being any other way either, we're a lot a like that way.\n\nWe're not going to have kids, and if we did split, I'd feel she was owed at minimum, all of the money she paid towards the house, if not half of the house itself. \n\nSo, should I still look into getting one? Feel free to be as critical as possible about my views on things. She already asked me if I wanted one, as I technically have more assets than her (even though I consider them ours), so getting one wouldn't be an issue. I feel the fact that she asked that speaks to her financial responsibility.", "summary": "have a financially responsible fiance. Can get a prenup if I want, but don't feel like I should. Should I?"}
{"id": "t3_2aawhs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] have a crush on my [18 F]friend, not sure if she has a crush on me too.", "post": "So, I have a crush on this girl since I met her in our freshman year of highschool. I think she has had a crush on me too, but I'm not sure.\n\n \nShe once put her phone on my cellphone without me asking for it. She gave me a nickname which none of my other friends use, and I love when she calls me by that nickname (I also have a nickname for her, that only I use). She would also sit beside me in all classes. She liked to hold hands with me \"because of the cold\", but then, no matter how the weather was, I would just grab her hand, or she would grab mine, just for the sake of holding hands. A friend of mine (female) always said that it was weird. \n\nThe problem is, she's living in another city now. She is visiting her mom in my city, and I asked her out last Sunday, and I was planning to tell her about my feelings. But I didn't. We had a great time, talked for a couple of hours that felt like a couple of minutes, but in the end I couldn't say anything. \n\nShe's leaving this Saturday, and I said I wanted to see her again because I had something to tell her. I think she already knows what it is about (after this text, anyway).\n\nWhat do you guys think? Is it possible that she has a crush on me?", "summary": "I'm not sure if this girl has a crush on me, but there are some signs out there that she does."}
{"id": "t3_3btr97", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Foot swollen after Salicylic acid wart treatment", "post": "Hi there,\n\nBasically, I have had a plantars wart on my right big toe for almost two years and the past couple weeks I have been fighting it pretty relentlessly. I have been doing freeze treatments, applying salicylic acid, and removing layers of dead skin.\n\nThe last time I removed skin was on Monday night. I got deep enough that I felt I was almost at the base of the wart. In an attempt to get closer to the bottom, I picked at the wart with my pocket knife (consistently disinfected the knife and my foot with lots of rubbing alcohol and wore gloves). I got deep but only deep enough to draw a tiny amount of blood. I then started reapplying my Salicylic acid treatment to the area from that night until this (Wednesday) morning.\n\nToday, my toe was very sore all day at work, and stung fairly sharply on the spot of my wart. I figured it might be from the salicylic acid, so when I got home from work, I soaked my toe in apple cider vinegar in an attempt to remove the dried acid. However, this didn't get rid of all of it. Also, at this point, I realized my toe and was getting fairly warm and swollen, and that the rest of my foot was getting a bit warm as well. After this, I took some isopropyl alcohol and a knife, and gently rubbed/peeled away all the visible dried acid left on my toe. However, my toe doesn't feel any better. I am currently laying with it raised and covered in neosporin.\n\nLong story short, should I be concerned about some sort of infection or anything? Or could this just be a normal response to my treatment? I have no known allergies, other serious medical conditions, or anything like that. I am a 20 year old white male and am (hopefully) healthy.\n\nThank you!", "summary": "Did a bit of self surgery/salicylic acid treatment on my plantars wart. Now my toe is red and swollen. Should I be worried?"}
{"id": "t3_1ky0nd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[23F] was dumped 4 months ago. Need some advice about getting back into dating", "post": "My boyfriend left me four months ago. We had been together almost three years. I really felt that the breakup was devastating. It took me a bit of time to get to where I am now. I realized that our relationship was unhealthy and my SO treated me poorly. I finally feel like my self again and I am happy in my life.\n\nI'd really like to go out and meet new people. I'm not really sure where to start. I'm worried it is going to feel strange. I'm worried about being awkward. I was completely committed to one person for almost 3 years. It seems it will be hard to open up. I'd love any advice on how to get back out there.", "summary": "long term bf left me. I took the breakup hard, but I am finally at a good place. I want to start dating again and I'm not sure where to begin. Advice would be lovely."}
{"id": "t3_20q08i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] was dumped by my [23 F] on my birthday and now she is in a relationship with my friend.", "post": "She broke up with me on my birthday 7 months ago, ending a 7 month relationship, because I didn't contribute to the rent, I stayed at her apartment and went to my college classes. She said 3 days earlier that she would breakup with me if I didn't find a job in 2 weeks, she broke her word. She said that I wasn't mature enough for a relationship. She told me not to get stuck on her and that I would find another girl. \n\nThen as of recently we stopped being friends with benefits because she has a new squeeze: my friend who I introduced her to. He told her to ignore me and she complied and now I am being treated like the bubonic plague. She threatened to throw out some of my clothes if I didn't give her marijuana and ever since(a full month later) she is still ignoring me.\n\nI would really like to get her back, but I understand that might not be an option. I am struggling for the first time in my life to be independent and will soon move to a state where I can start the business I want to but it will take some time before I am successful enough to support her and give her what she gave to me. \n\nPersonally it hurts but it seems like the best option is to move on, still I am having a hard time getting over her and I feel like she is telling me to fuck off. I think we both made mistakes but I think that her actions are unacceptable.\n\nHow should I deal with this and how do I have healthier relationships in the future? And how do I deal with this heartbreak?", "summary": "She broke up with me because I didn't pay rent, now she is with my friend and ignoring me. I don't know if it is worth it to salvage this relationship or if I should just move on."}
{"id": "t3_3cbmvj", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Help a middle-aged new college graduate improve my situation", "post": "I'm not actually graduating until next spring, but I thought that this would be a good time to ask, so I have plenty of time to get things in order or to possibly pursue some of the things that are advised.\n\nHere's the story: I'm 35 years old, a Marine Corps veteran and a married father of 3. At this time, my wife doesn't earn much at all and we're barely making it on my blue-collar income of around 43-48k/year (depends on overtime availability).\n\nI hate my job, and I'm finally finishing up my degree so that I can move into something else. Unfortunately, I've heard too many horror stories about recent grads being offered $13-15/hour and taking it because it's actually pretty good, relative to other offers or opportunities.\n\nI'm terrified that despite my education, I won't be able to move into anything that pays more than I'm currently making \"right out of the gate\", so to speak.\n\nI'm not afraid to move if I have to, and I can learn pretty much anything I need to. My BA will be in \"Integrative Leadership Studies\", which is just a generic Adult Degree program at my college.\n\nI'm not afraid to continue on to a graduate program, but I'd like to leave my current job first, if at all possible.\n\nDoes anyone have any advice?", "summary": "Help me to escape my dead-end, blue-collar, criminally-mismanaged, racist-filled job when I graduate next year, please."}
{"id": "t3_3dw22g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [38 M] with my Fiancee [27 F] of one and a half years, I found out she cannot leave me because of financial reasons", "post": "About 8 months ago we had a very bad fight. She had caught me in a lie (nothing about cheating, but it was something I lied about my past that was important to her). She was on the verge of breaking up with me. All of a sudden, we were fine about a few weeks later, and we rarely fought about that reason. \n\nNow, I just came to realize after a breakdown she had, that she may actually want to break up with me but she can't because she relies upon me greatly (much greater than I thought) for financial reasons. Basically she'd be out on the street and so would her mom (she sends her money from her part time job). If it were only her she said she could be \"free\" in her own words (but I think she might have been implying that she *would* be free if she had the chance.\n\nI'm not 100% sure what she was saying, that she *would* definitely not be with me now if it weren't for financial support, or that she is just upset because she doesn't at least have that choice. \n\nI can't figure it out, and I am devistated obviously! She just went to sleep and I don't even know what to do. \n\nI don't want to force someone to be with me while they don't want this, love isn't a one way street. Even if she tries to \"make the best of it\" to be with me, I only want someone with me who's in it 100%, especially since we plan on getting married. \n\nWhat to do? If I leave her because she's not 100% (or so I think) I would feel guilty, on top of that, her and her mom on the street (or at the very best couch surfing with relatives).", "summary": "My fiancee might be stuck with me and not be 100% \"into\" me, but may be staying with me due to her financial situation"}
{"id": "t3_2nieag", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can my [25/m] boyfriend and I[23/f] split the holidays?", "post": "I've been seeing my boyfriend for about 3 years now. For the last 2 years, when Thanksgiving and Christmas came along, we spent it with our own families. His family lives 5 hours away from my family, so it's not very realistic to spend one day with one family, and then go to the other one's the next day. I would really love to spend a holiday with my boyfriend, but I feel bad for my parents. His family makes a much bigger deal out of holidays than mine, and he likes his family a lot more than I like my family so I can't convince him to come spend the holiday with my family. Thanksgiving is tomorrow and I could still go with him to his parent's house over mine, but I hardly ever see my parents. My parents are currently spending a lot of money on me to put me through school, so I feel like it's really selfish of me to ditch my parents to spend Thanksgiving with my boyfriend and his family.\n\nSo I guess the main question is: Should I go ahead and finally spend a holiday with my boyfriend of 3 years, or should I spend it with my parents since they've been such good parents and I feel bad?\n\nAnd for another question... How can my boyfriend and I split holidays in the future so that everyone is happy?", "summary": "We are not used to spending the holiday without our parents and feel bad about doing it, but we also want to finally spend a holiday together since we haven't in the three years of being together."}
{"id": "t3_1iqlpj", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I hate a majority of the females in my age group.", "post": "23 year old male here. I don't know what else to say about this other than I hate the personalities of the 21 to 28 year old female population. A majority of them are completely superficial and have no drive beyond being the pretty girl or the object of physical desire. Having a conversation with them is like pulling teeth and hardly consists of any real or meaningful topics. Drinking, social media, and 'pretty' things. Basically the only three things that matter to women in this age bracket.\n\nI know I know... This is not true for everyone/fuck stereotyping/everyone is an individual bullshit. But seriously, take a look at your Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter account. You'll find a majority of this to be true. And of course you'll find the great ones who are just awesome people, but I feel like they are rare and very much exceptions to the rule. \n\nI compare them to the women I work with, who are around 30+ years of age, and the personal experiences I have had with them. A higher percentage of these women are incredibly funny with a deeper sense of humor, enjoy a broad range of topics in conversation, and treat people with much more respect. \n\nI guess the", "summary": "is basically how much I want to be out of the twenties and not be surrounded by people that are so vain it's almost painful to watch at times."}
{"id": "t3_d2iki", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Filming inside an airport, is it illegal?", "post": "Ok, heres the story:\n\nI was flying from Fortaleza (Brazil) to Stockholm (Sweden) with a connection in Lisbon on Monday evening. Once I got to the Fortaleza airport the flight got delayed a couple of hours but the TAP staff guaranteed us that we wouldn't miss the transfer flight in Lisbon even though it would be a very tight time schedule. Once in Lisbon we (pretty much everyone who was going to Stockholm) ran to the gate just to be denied boarding under the excuse that our luggage wont make it to this flight so we couldn't board, when asked if they could just let us board anyway and then send our luggage the TAP staff girl just said they wont do it. We all went to the transfer desk, pretty upset, only to find a huge line of people from other flights already complaining about their situation. From the 3 attendants in the transfer desk, only 1 was working and the other two just calmly said to us \"We cant help you, you should get in line and wait over there.\" There were pregnant women, people with babies, elderly and everyone stressing out because it has been over 2 hours and the line hasnt move a thing. Soon enough chaos starts and I hear the TAP woman screaming to a customer \"You shut the fuck up! And you too sir!\" (in portuguese). \n\nThats when I pick up my phone and start filming when a lady which was in line with us says: \"You better put that down, you dont have any permission to film here and if you continue, I am allowed to throw your phone away.\" I said it would be illegal of me to publish it but Im filming it to myself and I can do it. She said she was from the press and she knows the law and I cant do that. I didnt want any trouble because it was already a mess over there so I put my phone down and told the lady to fuck off and so we stayed in line until after much trouble, we managed to get home the next day. \n\nSo reddit? Is it wrong to film inside an airport? Was she right and I wrong?", "summary": "During my flight back home, I started filming after a small incident at the Lisbon airport to which a lady said I couldn't do that and threatened to throw my phone away."}
{"id": "t3_4x02ii", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [24/F] wanted to break up with me [23/F] - did I wrong her?", "post": "We've dated for about a month and a half. She wanted a serious relationship. To preface the situation - she told me about a time when she was having exams, and she vomited. Her parents or boyfriend at the time would take care of her.\n\nI came down with a bad fever and was coughing blood. I took a week off school and work. She took time off studying to spend half a day taking care of me. Two days later, she has her final exam. While I'm at home recovering, she calls me to let me know that she feels extremely ill and threw up in the middle of her exam. I tell her that she should call 911 immediately as I won't be able to come to her and she does that, and is hospitalized for the day. I do not visit her, as I feel quite sick and fear that I may have passed something to her.\n\nThe next day, she goes home to recover, but is still feeling quite down. I go to visit my parents to pick up some mail. I ask if she needs anything at this time, and she declines, telling me that she doesn't need me to help her now.\n\nA week later, she tells me that she wants to break up over the situation. Her friend had to take care of her in the hospital, and he asked where her boyfriend (me) was. She also pointed out that I was feeling good enough to visit my parents. I was still coughing blood and had a fever at that point, and wasn't thinking very clearly. I had feared that I may have passed something to my girlfriend and that visiting her in the hospital could be bad for both of us.", "summary": "Girlfriend takes care of me while I'm very sick, then vomits during final exam 2 days later. I didn't visit her in the hospital, and she wanted a breakup after that. Am I negligent in this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_2htgtu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] with my friend/ex [24 F] \"together\" for a year put the nail in the coffin.", "post": "I was just staring at this text box for the longest time. Just thinking about what I wanted to say. and in the end its not like a long drawn out story will make any difference. I just want to vent. \n\nThe title says what happened. this girl i had been associating with we were a great team, always fun, always laughs always a good time. we were close. she came onto me strong out of her relationship. but in the end decided to go back to him.\n\nperhaps not directly, but her life is such a mess and he is the only one that can give her stability because he does everything she asks him to. always awaiting a command always willing to let her if need be even cheat on him so long as it suits her needs.\n\nI didn't let that happen. and its caused such a rift between us that its now over. and here i sit. day 5 into no contact. not because i want to get her back but just because i can't deal with the pain knowing her ex is always around or some other guy is always around. the questions the insecurity the sleepless nights wondering if she's snuggling up to another man that's not me. \n\nShe contact me on the second day of no contact sending me a video of her doing cute things basically a movie version of a selfie and how she couldn't stop thinking about me. I ignored it answered the next day saying \"loved the video\" and that was it. She keeps liking my pics on instagram its like she's still with me but not. its just silence. \n\ni'm a wreak, drinking, smoking non stop. but all i can do is drown out the pain. and hope for a better tomorrow. Nobody needs to respond to this. I just wanted to vent.", "summary": "girl broke up with me for her ex who she broke up with him for me. , no response needed i just wanted to vent."}
{"id": "t3_23k9om", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18M] Girlfriend [17F] lives in an abusive household", "post": "Hello, Reddit.  I usually don't post much but this is a big problem for me and I would like to get more points of view, information regarding the situation, and any possible courses of action I could take to help.\n\nFirst off, I would like to say I love reading both this subreddit and r/longdistance. I love seeing how supportive you guys are and it restores my faith in people quite often.  I like reading both subreddits when I'm upset.\n\nMy girlfriend, lets call her Samantha, has a lot of issues with her home life.  Her mom is bipolar and quite frankly nuts, she has these episodes where she physicially abuses Samantha and her younger siblings that live with her.  She has gone as far as throwing razor blades and glass objects at her.  Samantha does everything she can to make her mom calm down, but sometimes this is just met with even more violence.  Her mother will hit the younger kids as well and Samantha does her best to protect them and stand up for them.  \n\nEven when she isn't going through an episode like this, Samantha's mother doesn't treat her well in any respect.  She gives her the responsibilities of an adult, yet treats her like a child.  Samantha has 2 facebook accounts, the initial reason being that her mother wouldn't let her talk to her dad and his side of the family, but now she uses it a lot to talk to my mom and I.  Her mother knows the account information for her original one and goes on there and reads her conversations and such.  She does everything she can to control every aspect of Samantha's life.  It seems like she's even trying to break us up, but I doubt that's going to work out for her.\n\nMy mom told her that we would all come up with something together to do to help her, but I honestly don't know what kind of a solution could be presented.  I would love to hear reddit's opinion and if you guys think there's anything we can do to help her.  We are all here to support and and do whatever we can.", "summary": "GF's mom is abusive and controls every aspect of her life that she possibly can.  Would like to know how I can support her/possible courses of actions I could take to do anything about the situation."}
{"id": "t3_50r8lr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [M20] worried about emotional manipulation from girlfriend [F20].", "post": "I've found recently that my girlfriend has been saying things which make me feel uncomfortable dye to the way they're said. We're not doing great at the minute so I'm concerned this is changing my thinking. \n\nEssentially, we had an argument recently and now talking between us is more stilted (we're in different countries right now, by the way). The things that have me worried are when she says things like she needs to talk to me to distract her from thinking about hurting herself and that she \"hopes I know\" she's depending on me to make her happy. \n\nI don't want to seem overly selfish, I'm concerned about that. Of course I want to help and I have for as long as we have been dating (around a year and a half now). It just feels like some of these things are more of a threat than asking for help. This is partially caused by the fact that when I try to offer suggestions they're met with rejection as being too hard, not what she wants as the solution or simply as not going to work. \n\nI feel guilty writing this and I feel guiltier that I've been considering the future of our relationship recently. It feels like she's making sure I know just how guilty I should feel if I left. This is made worse by her recently accusing me of fostering her dependency on me while I'm not dependant on her (I'm not sure how I did this and when I tried to offer her ways of becoming more independent they were shot down). \n\nAm I being selfish here and thinking too much about my self, not enough about her? I do want to help and I don't want to make it all about me but these thoughts keep coming back to me. I'm not sure what to do so any advice is appreciated. \nHas anyone experienced anything like this before?\nAm I wrong here and being overly defensive or is this manipulative?\nMost importantly, where do I go from here?", "summary": "It feels like my girlfriend is threatening me to ensure I stay with her. I don't feel like this is right but I'm not sure if I'm being overly selfish. "}
{"id": "t3_1bgiup", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "I think my beagle is sick. Can anyone offer any insight/share any similar experiences? (x-post /r/beagle)", "post": "So last Friday (March 29th) my 5 and a half year old beagle, Miles, started acting weirdly. He would start shaking and quietly whining. My family and I chalked it up to being in a new environment since we brought him to stay with us overnight at my grandparents' new home. This wasn't too worrying to us, since Miles is epileptic (relatively common among beagles) and we assumed he was having a mild seizure. But the problem persisted through the night and every couple hours he would start shaking again on every inhale. Also, he refuses to jump onto the furniture he knows he's allowed on; he chooses to stay on the floor and whine or I have to pick him up to be on the furniture with me. What I noticed starting yesterday is that he seems to be in pain around his bottom ribs and haunches. I tried lightly poking him in those areas every couple of hours and every time I do, he yelps. \n\nThroughout all of this I noticed what worries me the most. As any beagle owner would know, beagles can't shut up around food. Never before has Miles acted calm around food, let alone slept in his kennel during Easter lunch in a strange environment. He won't run up to snatch a treat out of my hand, either. I have to offer it to him a few inches from his nose, or, if I throw it on the floor he might be bothered to mosey on over and chomp it up very slowly. \n\nDoes anyone know what may be wrong with him?", "summary": "5 and 1/2 y/o epileptic beagle showing pain and loss of appetite. Never seen symptoms like this in him before"}
{"id": "t3_3wvwv9", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "[insurance] I can no longer afford insurance for myself and my family", "post": "Okay... Long story short.\n\nMy wife was a school teacher but hated her life. At this time i was working full time and working on my degree. Well things flip flopped around and I ended up going to part time at work because I needed 50 credit hours to graduate and it was either get it done in one year or, because of prereqs, get it done in 2 1/2. After I moved to part time we got pregnant (planned) and my wife decided that she couldn't do the teaching thing anymore so she switched jobs. We were not thinking of the insurance implications. \n\nWe went from $90 a month to $750 for the three of us... thats right $750. We tried to split it up because coverage for her and the baby is $320 and my employer will offer me insurance for $380. We still couldnt budget that. So i go to the healthcare.gov website and apply but because my employer offers coverage i get no discount. I am now officially paying $175 for the worlds worst insurance only to avoid paying premium increase on our house and car insurance as well as the stupid tax for not having any. At this point I am wondering if it is even worth it to have a job because even though I would lose my part time income of 29k we could save 12k per year in day care costs and who knows, maybe get free health care (this of course really isn't an option)\n\nI would like to know if there is some sort of advocacy service that can help me navigate the insurance system so that I can get my family affordable insurance without paying over 15% of our annual  income.\n\nSorry if this comes across ranty but i just get discouraged when two people who try to plan, go to school, contribute to society, and stay employed end up getting shafted this hard when they simply want to get a pair of glasses and some back adjustments.", "summary": "My wife and I decided to get degrees and have a kid. We apparently made bad choices because now we owe 12k per year in childcare costs and our insurance went from $90 per month to over $500. "}
{"id": "t3_42bt93", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26F] with my boyfriend [37M] of 11 months, long distance relationship says I'm being to needy.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for 11 months, the first few months of which we lived in the same city. He recently moved away for work and we are now living in different countries.\n\n  If I had my way we would be texting trough out the day because that's just the way I operate and when something noteworthy happens, he is the first I want to tell. That doesn't go over well with him because he feels like I am bombarding him and he can't get other things done, which I'm fine with. I've been trying to keep my texting to minimum. \n\n We've also had other issues where he was feeling suffocated when I wanted to spend the night with him most nights, but we worked through it.\n\n So right now we are trying to make this long distance thing work and I know he doesn't like to text or be texted a lot so I suggested (after reading a whole bunch of long distance relationship tips online) that the first person to wake up or go to bed would text the other goodnight or good morning. That way we know we are thinking about each other and it's a way to keep our everyday contact alive even if we are thousands of miles away.\n\n While he initially liked the idea and texted goodnight and good morning he has not done so these past couple days. I brought it up to him and he got very defensive and said that I was being needy and that he doesn't want to text me because he HAS to be because he WANTS to, which I totally understand. Except when I've tried to just let things flow I'll get one text every two days and that's just not enough I feel to keep a long distance relationship alive. So I would like an outside opinion on this; Am I being to needy? Should I just be grateful for the attention he gives me and leave it at that?", "summary": "Boyfriend that lives in different country doesn't want to text me good morning and goodnight. Thinks we should just let things happen naturally but then never texts if we do."}
{"id": "t3_1eu8ci", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Dog with sore paw.. not a happy pup! Please help?", "post": "So tonight I have to take my dog back to the vet, for his wee paw. He has been ill today and keeps 'fighting' with the cone he has on to stop him licking the sore part of his paw. My problem is that i have to get him to the vets tonight, we're getting a taxi but I'm not sure how to get him from our house to the car! basically when i go near him he gets very agitated, so my question is how do i calm him down enough to pick him up ? Because he cant walk on the paw its the only way I'll get him out to the taxi :/", "summary": "how do I calm my dog down enough to pick him up so I can safely get him to the vets without further damage to his paw?"}
{"id": "t3_e6dmd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How shitty of a person am I?", "post": "This is a throw-away, and as kind and respectful as you are Reddit, I want your honest opinions.\n\nOver the weekend, I ended up sleeping with two different girls within about a 14 hour period.\n\nThe first girl was early in the day, maybe 1-2pm.  I was talking to her and asked her to come over and get lunch and make out.  Her and I have sort of dating the last year.  I say sort of because it has never been official, we've discussed it numerous times and never decided to make it exclusive.  We have sort of a cutesy relationship in terms of how we act around each other, so it's not a clean pump and dump.  She lives about an hour and a half away, and I see her maybe once a month if that.  We're kind of on the tail-end of whatever it was we've been doing for the last year or so.\n\nThen later that night another girl called and asked to hang out.  She has a thing for me, and I'm conflicted.  She's cool, and a solid friend, but sometimes attractive to me, sometimes not.  Everything was normal, and we watched a couple episodes of LOST, and then I told her I wanted to go to sleep (asleep sleep).  Then jokingly asked her if she wanted to start drinking, somehow we ended up drinking, and 2 hours or so later, she told me she was tired and we needed to go lay-down.  We have a slight history of hooking up.  Like twice in a couple of months.  Anyway, she obviously stayed the night, and we ended up sleeping together.  How should I feel about myself for doing this?", "summary": "I slept with two different girls within 12 hours of each other. Both have feelings for me, and have a vague sort of ending relationship with one.  Am I shitty person?"}
{"id": "t3_3ir7rl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] am confused as to what I want with my gf [18F] of a little over a year", "post": "We started dating my junior, her senior year and have been ever since. Now I am a senior and she is away at a college within reasonable driving distance. I love her and she loves me. While we are content with each other (we like to see each other, like some of the same things) I do have a few concerns about us. \n\n1) I have never had another serious relationship with anyone else. I feel like I cant make an informed decision of weather I an truly happy here unless I take some time to sort me out and try dating some other people to see what its like.\n\n2) While some of our interests overlap, other things don't mix, our love languages are different (I'm big on touch, her not so much, but she puts up with it to an extent), we like different kinds of movies and stuff etc\n\n3) Our families are from different socioeconomic classes, mine higher than hers. This isin't a big deal to me, but it adds stress to when I think about a possible future for us (how we would deal with bills/stuff, her family (and extended family) structure is different, much larger than mine and just a completely different dynamic).\n\n4) While every time I have told her I love her, I have 100% meant it, I think I'm too young to choose a forever partner. I think I need to build my own life and see what else is out there.\n\nI have been discussing this with her and we considered an open relationship so I can see what else is out there, and while she agreed at the time, I don't think she is ok with me being with anyone else while we are \"together\", which I completely understand, but in that case I don't want to string her along if the end goal is to just be \"ok\" this year and break it off when I go to college net year. \n\nShe says I'm selfish, and I agree, but I'm having to weigh my love for her vs. doing what is best for me.", "summary": "Cant decide weather to stay with gf of a year while she goes to college, or break it off and explore other options. But I do love her and don't want to lose her."}
{"id": "t3_1ai3o2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [22M] confront my friend (and ex girlfriend) [21F] about my remaining feelings for her", "post": "Recently myself [22M] and a friend of three years [21F] (not close, on and off) hooked up and from there began a relationship. We dated for four months before she called time on it in January because she \"wanted to be alone\" and by herself for the last few months of our last year of University (although she followed this up by saying she would probably \"regret\" her decision in a few weeks and that I was \"the best\" boyfriend she'd ever had, great closure, huh?).\n\nI understand all her reasoning behind it, the last year being stressful and to add a relationship onto that would be extra tough. However, although I agreed to still be friends with her, I still have strong latent feelings for her. I have attempted \"No Contact\" a few times but keep getting drawn back into texting/messaging her. Every now and again I will feel like I'm over it only to see her around, get a text or be at a party/gathering with her and have everything rush back.\n\nI'm sick of this, and so have resolved to bite the bullet and confess that I am still attracted to her, and, though I'm aware that at the moment she just wants to be alone and be friends, its not something I can change for now.\n\nI don't, however, know how to approach this. I obviously shouldn't (and don't plan to) do this over text or messaging. However I also feel a phonecall would be too impersonal and wouldn't get my point across properly. I was thinking of inviting her to have lunch at a neutral location (a cafe on campus or similar) and talking to her there.\n\nSo, the crux of the matter is what do I say and how do I go about it? I don't want her to feel like its her fault or that I'm going to ignore her / be a dick about it. If anyone has any ideas or suggestion it would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Still have feelings for a friend and ex girlfriend and want to know how I can tell her this without alienating her completely or coming off as a dick."}
{"id": "t3_3bpwqh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M/F] with my two best friends who date each other [22 M and F] of 4 years, found out one cheated and need advice", "post": "Hey reddit, obvious throwaway just to be safe. This is an odd situation with me.\n\nEarlier today I was at work having lunch, when Kate decides to tell me and another co-worker a secret of hers. It went something like \"2 years ago, Adam that used to work here engaged in sexual activies\" - she knew I was friends with Adam, she did not know that he lives with me however. \n\nNow, normally I would confront him about it, ask him wtf he is doing, he's my best mate - but he tends to not always think with his head. The problem lies with the fact his girlfriend is also a very good friend of mine, and so if I confront the issue between them, im walking away without a friend. \n\nI know he's better than this, but I am extremely upset. Furthermore, if it was something that happened 2 years ago, I would accept he fucked up and moved on, but Kate decides to tell me that he contacted her this spring. Which means, once a cheater always a cheater. His excuse for it was pathetic, Kate knew she fucked up and declined any more efforts of his.\n\nSo reddit, what should I do? Part of me is inclined to erase this from my memory, it's none of my business, it's between Adam, Kate, and Adam's GF. On the other hand, Adam's gf is crazy about him, wants to marry him, and seeing her waste her life away on this guy is heartbreaking. If I told her, I am scared of what he might to do - he lives with me and it will get ugly, as he has anger issues  (albeit, not as bad as they used to be) and tends to act on impulse rather than with his head. Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thank you.", "summary": "Best friend cheated with a co-worker, his gf is also my best friend and I am stuck in situation where want to drop the issue, it isn't any of my business, but I feel she deserves to know."}
{"id": "t3_4zo31j", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying all six sliders at Steak & Shake", "post": "This actually happened when I was young, but you understand. \n\nIt was about 1 in the morning and I was out with the boys. They were playing cards on our table at Steak & Shake while I watched. We order our meals. I was indecisive and so I told the waiter \"1 of every slider!\". He put down his pad and said \"Really, dude?\". I don't tolerate this kind of disrespect and saw it as a challenge. \"Yes,\" I said, \"All six, with cheese!\" About 35 minutes pass and I've drank all my water. No refill would be given to me. The boys finished their meals and we're ready to leave. I said \"Hold on fellas, let me eat! but they wanted to leave NOW. So I crammed the last 2 sliders, a buffalo and a frisco, right into my mouth and swalloed. However, they got caught in my throat. Having no drink I could not down them. My instincts kicked in and I projectile vomited onto the table, including on the man's tip. I got up and said to my buddies \"We gotta get out of here, boys.\" They asked me why just as the waiter came to the table and began to gag. We ran. And since then the boys refuse to buy me lunch or even take me to lunch.", "summary": "Steak & Shake Sliders slided at a high velocity from my mouth, drenching the table and money in vomit."}
{"id": "t3_ielvl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I want to understand his point of view on this monogamy issue...", "post": "ok.  We have been together 5 years, me and his both 24.  I am his first serious relationship and only sexual partner\n\nQuick and simple: I have never made a big deal out of sex, and, in general, would not mind an open relationship.  However, my SO would never ever allow me to be with another man, so because of that, in this case, I don't feel comfortable being in an open realtionship with him.  Because he knows my views on sex (that I don't care all that much about monogomy) he considers this to be me playing tit for tat with him, and considers it unreasonable.   He is young and has only been with me, I understand him wanting to explore sexually.  But again, I would not feel comfortable in a one sided open relationship.  He said its not about me, this is something he wants, why am I making it about myself, tit for tat, etc.  \n\nSimilar example: he got upset when I mentioned i wanted to go to a bar some years ago and said he's not comfortable with it. I respected that.  About a year later, he asked to go to a strip club with his friends. Here's the thing, do I care about a boyfriend I am with going to a strip club?  In general, No.  I get that it's all fun.  But again, I would expect that same freedom to be granted to me.  Because he would not even allow me to go to a bar even though I don't drink and would just go with friends to hang out, yeah, I told him no don't go, I don't feel comfortable. Again, another fight about how I'm fucking him around playing games with him.  I'm really not trying to, it's just with this particular situation I would have felt entirely disrespected.  He said it's my fault for feeling disrespected.", "summary": "boyfriend wants open relationship but wouldn't feel comfortable wit me being with other guys.  Claims I'm playing tit for tat to deny his request"}
{"id": "t3_2o9kca", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU: By recognizing a girl i went to HS with on Reddit and telling her.", "post": "throwaway for obvious reasons. THIS HAPPENED TODAY.\n\nShe posted a pic of herself celebrating something and decided to share on the website, and got alot of points for it. Thus, being seen by alot of people. I.E ME. My first reaction was \"oh good for this person, that's amazing\". My second reaction was something like...\"wait I know those eyes\". This was around 2 AM. So the genius that I am decides to message her pretty much stating (insert name here)? I thought to myself, that's not creepy right? It probably is, but she'll understand. if anything she'll ask who this is. NEVER HAVE I BEEN SO WRONG IN MY LIFE. Since i'm still up I decided to log back in and see if I had gotten a reply. she NOPE'D outta there and deleted her account. So I probably made her **SUUUPER** uncomfortable, and people really don't need that. if you happen to read this know that I'm incredibly sorry and I will never do that again. uhh. congrats. ... :(", "summary": "PM'd her. She nope'd outta her account. probably feeling insanely uncomfortable, because who does that. only stupid people do. **IM SORRY**"}
{"id": "t3_mzcfr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Laid off after two days on the job, what's a entry level person to do?", "post": "Fresh out of college, trying to get a job as a server though I have little to no experience with it. I really wanted the job because serving is a skill I want to have experience with. This local business hired me, I told them upfront I had no experience but was a quick learner. They started me off first day as a dishwasher, and I handled it fine. The second day they wanted to start training me as a busboy and ease my way into a serving position. I was so excited for this opportunity to move up that quickly. I paid close attention, asked a question for clarity when I didn't understand something, and made sure that the guests were well attended to. At the end of the night they told me good job and though there were a few things I needed to work on they didn't expect much for my first try at it. \nI go into work today and the manager (who wasn't there the night before) sat me down and told me that they were letting me go because they didn't feel I wasn't good enough and that they needed someone with more restaurant experience. Though I only worked there for a few days I was devastated. It's a shitty shitty feeling when someone tells you you're not good enough. I mean, I'm smart I'm competent I feel like I'll pick things up once I get a hang of things. \n\nI've been scrolling through Craigslist the past few hours looking at more restaurant positions and all of them say the same thing \"2+ years experience required.\" Even a dish washing position is required to have multiple years of experience. I feel like the problem out there isn't that there aren't any jobs, there's tons of them I just looked at. It's just the pool of unemployed is so large that businesses are demanding the highest of qualifications for some of the most entry leveled jobs. So my question is how is someone who isn't as qualified compete in our world today?", "summary": "Got laid off for not having enough experience, how can someone who is \"inexperienced\" compete in today's job market?"}
{"id": "t3_x4k9p", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Texting charges? USA to europe", "post": "Not sure if this is the best subreddit but I'm at a restaurant in Italy on my iPhone and I couldn't find anything better. I have AT&T and paid for 500 texts for while I'm here. I just checked my at&t app and it says I've used 57/500 texts, but I'm pretty sure between sending and receiving its been more. Does it charge for both, or just sending?\nI've been texting my boyfriend who is in California, he has Verizon. Does it charge him to text me while I'm here? I figured it would charge me both ways and the 500 I bought would cover it but now I'm concerned since it only says I've used 57. I haven't counted I'm just pretty sure it's more.", "summary": "does it charge someone in the US to text someone who is visiting Europe (that is using an american phone)? Even if the person visiting Europe paid for 500 (international?) texts?"}
{"id": "t3_2i1q6p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I am [19F], and my mother wouldn't approve of me 'online dating'.", "post": "I'm so sorry this is all so muddled, I just don't know how to explain it properly. Also wasn't sure what to flair this as, so I just put it as 'dating'.\n\nI am a 19 year old female, never had a boyfriend and only had my first kiss a few months ago, so I'm relatively 'innocent'. I know Tinder isn't really a \"dating app\" but I installed it a few months ago just for fun, until it turned into me actually agreeing to meet up with guys who I hit it off with. But I'm facing the problem of my mother, who I haven't told that I'm meeting people online, because I know she would get angry or not allow me to meet people.\n\nI've only met one guy from Tinder in real life, and the only reason I did was because I lied to my mum about where I was. Today I was supposed to meet up and have lunch with another guy I met on Tinder, so I told my mum I was having lunch with a boy in the city. I was contemplating just saying I was having lunch with friends, but decided to tell her i was going with a boy, but not that I met him online. Then I realised that i made a massive mistake, as now I have practically dug a grave for myself, when i told her I met him locally when he actually lives nearly and hour and a half away, and became really evasive about other details. So I ended up cancelling the date, and I'm going to be questioned SO much by my mum that i'm going to have to confess that I lied and that I met him online, and that's going to cause a bit of strife.\n\nI feel so pathetic about virtually needing my mother's consent to go and meet people! I know about 'stranger danger' and am safe when it comes to this, so how do I go about meeting people from online with my mother being so over-protective? I honestly don't know how anyone my age does it.", "summary": "Mother isn't approving of me meeting people online and I ended up digging myself a hole by lying. Should I tell her I met the guy online? How should I tell her? And should I stop 'online dating'?"}
{"id": "t3_1ys9ul", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] She [22 w],Made out drunk, wanted more but couldnt.", "post": "I was on her birthday party. We liked us for a year and saw each other in a couple of small house parties but i wasnt sure how much she liked me. \n\nWell the moment i entered the party she made it pretty clear where we both stand. \n\nShe was already drunk and was quite touchy. When we were alone i went for the kiss and we made out a couple of minutes until she had to go back to the party. \n\nWell over the time of the party we made out on and off when we had time and space. \n\nWe both were now pretty clear that we wanted more. \n\nThe problem was that we had to wait for the party to end. Wellll that didnt happen. I eventually left at 5 in the morning tired we agreed that i d call her the next day. \n\nMe leaving her alone wasnt the best feeling but staying was a torture i couldnt have made it without falling asleep.\n\nI called her today. We will meet this week.\n\nI think we know each other quite good but i believe she doesnt know me aswell as she may think and that freaks me out.", "summary": "Finally made out with a girl i liked. Both wanted more didnt happen left her at 5:00 in the morning in a cab."}
{"id": "t3_42e8ro", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by throwing my shitty slipper at an old lady.", "post": "This happened 10 minutes ago. I was walking home from the grocery store\u2014 a full bag of stuff ranging from milk to toothpaste, in either hand. This stuff was really heavy, so I wasn't really looking down, scanning the road for potential shit for my feet to squish; I just wanted to get home quickly before my arms separated from my body. You can probably guess what happened next, I stamped on a surprisingly large piece of dog shit. Or maybe it could be human shit, who knows. I don't know my shit. I didn't know what to do. My house was just two blocks away, but I didn't want to keep walking in my shitty slippers. So I decided I'd try to shake most of the shit off of it. I shook. Nothing happened. I shook harder. Nothing happened. This shit was made of super glue. I see the old lady who always wants to start a conversation with me for some reason; she's approaching me. I freak out. My arms pain really bad. So I shake my slipper really violently, and it comes off and flies right at the old. It hit her left boob, shit side up. I didn't know what to do, again. I was freaking out even more now. I had two options\u2014 wait, apologise, take my shitty slipper home and have a fucking long conversation with the annoying lady; or run home one slipper less. I really didn't want to talk to the lady, and eh, I could buy new slippers. I had just a few seconds before she approached; the shock of the flying shitty slipper was still with her. I committed, and ran\u2014 nay, wobbled like a penguin wearing one slipper. This still isn't over. The handles of one of the bags tore. It fell off. I lost my wobble-rhythm and the other one fell too. I lost my balance and fell with it. I just left all the stuff there and sprinted home.\nI don't know what I'm going to tell my mom.", "summary": "Stamped in shit, tried to shake it off. It hit an annoying old lady. Dropped all my stuff while trying to run home."}
{"id": "t3_38ubfn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [16m] tell her [16f] how I feel/felt? Ready to move on/make last ditch effort after 2 months of flirting", "post": "Male 16. So I've been talking to this girl for a few weeks now, and we really seemed to click. A few weeks ago she was being really flirty, and seemed like she wanted me to ask her out. I was waiting for the right time to ask her out, but she was never just by herself with me to ask. \n\n   A week went by and I tried talk to her and she just seemed really distant, like she almost wanted nothing to do with me. We had this off and on relationship of her being really flirty and then really distant. This has lasted 5 weeks. This [thread] I posted in r/teenrelationships sums it up pretty well. \n\n   Anyways, I'm ready to make one last ditch effort/try to move on. What I'm asking for is advice on this one matter: Should I tell her how I feel? I think it could help me get my feelings for her off of my chest and make it easier to move on. On the other hand, if she gets all touched and stuff and wants to go out with me after that, then hey, that's great.\n\n   I do realize that telling girls how you feel isn't really fair to them by overloading them with all of that baggage. I do realize that I could create a completely irreparable relationship with this girl. I'm just ready to make one last ditch effort, or make an effort to move on.\n\n   What do I do, r/relationships? Do I tell her how I feel, or do I just soldier on?", "summary": "Off and on relationship with this girl, ready to make last ditch effort/try to move on from her. Need advice on whether to tell her how I feel or not."}
{"id": "t3_2t8zc5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my married online friend [30 F] 3 months, strained emotional relationship", "post": "I posted a few weeks back but deleted the post. The summary of the situation is this: I met a female gamer playing an mmo who is currently married with two kids  and is in an emotionally abusive marriage. She has been in this marriage for 10 years. My insecurities caused a rift and our contact has become strained. \n\nWe became close, feelings were very strong and we professed our mutual love for each other. We chatted and Skyped often. \n\nIn time, though, my insecurities and unease with the situation placed stress upon us both which has brought me to where we are. I tried to break off contact two weeks ago and stated as such. She was devastated and I ended up being unable to follow through. We decided our best bet was to try and remove the emotional side from it and I have been unable to do so.\n\nI've really struggled with everything. I feel like I love this woman and I know that my constant worries and questions caused the rift. It became very hard to not feel sad when her husband would call and interrupt our Skype sessions. Or when she suddenly changed factions in the game we played and seemed no longer wanting to play with me. I would make my feelings known and she tried to reassure me. It all became too much, as she felt as if it wasn't enough and she couldn't be enough. \n\nThis past week, I told her that I couldn't handle just being friends right now and I should try to take some space. She explained that she doesn't feel the same as she once did and she doesn't know what the future holds. She said she isn't able to write things off for good yet but space and time are important. \n\nMy questions are this:\n\nIs there hope or is it worth holding out hope for a future? \nAm I wrong to feel so bad about how I handled the situation?\nHow can I overcome my insecurities relative to this situation?", "summary": "I've struck up an emotional relationship with a married woman and couldn't handle the situation. Looking for advice on how to preserve our relationship or move forward."}
{"id": "t3_2c100k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I sent my estranged friend an anonymous letter and I don't know how to process the response. Advice would be appreciated.", "post": "She and I met in freshman year (I was 18, she 17) as neighbors in our dorm. We lived together for several years (about 3) but at some point started to have our insecurities interfere with our relationship. Our friendship faced several set backs and pretty much fizzled out in a rather dramatic fashion. At first this was okay. I was angry and couldn't communicate or forgive. At the time I didn't want to acknowledge that I had made mistakes too. \n\nA long while had gone by since I'd thought about her. I've been dealing with a lot and have kind of gone down this hermit path, I honestly have no friends in the city I live in. In my loneliness, the thoughts of our good times came to mind and I just started missing her so much. Now go to several days ago - I sent my friend an anonymous message on tumblr basically saying I loved them and always will. Of course this could be interpreted both as friendship-love or romantic, so this could have been unclear. A few messages later (still anonymous) it was basically said that she had realized who it was and that they had let it go (meaning our past problems). \n\nQUESTION: Now in my note I had hinted I wanted to rekindle our friendship so, should I take this 'all is forgiven' attitude as she is over the past and that's it- no chance; or, is the person over the past and open to something? Sorry that was pretty drawn out or if this all seems petty. It's just this person meant so much to me at one point. My feelings got hurt and I hurt their feelings, and then it was just done. Time has passed, making reconciliation that much more unlikely.\n\nAm I being delusional or weird for holding on to some memory of a person?", "summary": "Sent friend an ambiguous and anonymous letter on tumblr in hopes to rekindle relationship; don't understand the response."}
{"id": "t3_4dlg74", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 F] boyfriends [26 M] past haunts me.", "post": "Basically I want your opinion on dealing with a significant other's past. \n\nI hate my boyfriend's past. I hate his past relationships, friends with benefits, and friendships with other females that he had before me. I hate the girls he used to be infatuated with, the girls he was attracted to, etc.\n\nI'm the type who asked him for all these details, but ultimately hearing them made me upset and obsessed and filled with hatred.\n\nI snooped on his computer, his old profiles, and found things that I didn't like.\n\nMind you, this is the PAST. All these things that happened before me, shady or not, are a thing of the past: nonexistent. \n\nWhat do you think of your partner's past? How do you deal with it? Do you even care about it? \n\nI hate my behavior and would love to hear other people's perspectives on this issue.", "summary": "I want to hear other's opinions on dealing with their partner's past/history with other people so I can get some perspective and hopefully mature a bit."}
{"id": "t3_512cex", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my boyfriend [25M] of 5 years. I think I want to move on, but I'm scared and feel guilty.", "post": "I really love my 25M boyfriend. We've been in a great relationship since the start. We live together. I've now finished school and am unsure of where the whole thing is going. Nothing is really wrong, but I don't feel satisfied. Am I chasing a golden goose?  \n\n**Here's what I love about my relationship with him:**  \n\n* I love the guy and he loves me\n* My parents and family love him, which is very important to me\n* We agree on all fundamental values & beliefs\n* We talk about getting married in general\n* He makes me laugh\n* He is so smart and caring\n* I trust him with absolutely no reservations \n* He is the kindest, most wonderful person in the world and I've never met anyone who didn't like him  \n\n**But**  \n\n* Though we've talked about marriage, there's no proposal/engagement/plan with real goals\n* We've been together for so long that I don't remember what it's like to be myself\n* I'm attracted to more than one person outside of the relationship, and that terrifies me\n* I hate it when I feel like I have to drag him to go out and have fun/justify wanting to go out and have fun (like at bars, dancing, etc)\n* He still has 3 more years of school left and that seems like such a long time to wait to settle down\n* I feel like I'm trying to justify being unhappy because our relationship is wonderful on paper and I feel like I'm just a shitty whiner/guilty about wanting something different  \n\nSo what do you think?  \n\nThis is just what happens to people our age, right?  \n\nI'm just a big whiner, right?", "summary": "Long term relationship. I really have no idea what's right. I think I want to move on but not sure if I'm justified/can handle the disappointment and grief."}
{"id": "t3_3irukr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F, 24] had a falling out with friend [F, 23], have anxiety when I need to see her in group situations. Help!", "post": "I'm coming to you with a weird problem which has probably occurred before. However, I am curious to see what others think about this problem, and if anyone has any tips for dealing with it.\nA few months ago I had a falling out with someone I considered a great friend. I won't really go into details other than to say that we were both at fault with our shitty behaviours. Nevertheless, I am trying to put this episode in the past. However, we are no longer friends at all anymore.\n\nHowever, we have a lot of mutual friends. I have purposefully kept quiet about the situation to avoid drama, but my former friend seems to have been gossiping to her close friends about me. So it appears that there's a whole group of people who think I'm not worth being around.\n\nNormally that wouldn't annoy me, because I have a lot of good friends and not a whole lot of free time due to my job, career prospects, etc. However, I do occasionally have to see this former friend at parties. Usually her group of friends is with her and I can't help but feel anxious when I know I'm going to be seeing her. However, these gatherings are the only times I get to see some of my other friends, so I don't want to avoid them altogether.\n\nHas anyone ever been in similar position here? How did you deal with it? I have a feeling that even if I try saying a polite hello, my former friend will just ignore me. Should I even try to be polite? I want to avoid awkwardness but it's difficult when you have mutual friends who don't know what happened. But I can't help but feel really keen anxiety when I think about having to interact with her. I really don't want to, but I want to see my friends. \n\nDo you recommend talking to my friends about what's happened, or just staying quiet for now? I didn't want to stir drama but was thinking that maybe at least some of my close friends", "summary": "Had falling out with friend, still have to see her at parties with her group of friends, feel anxiety about going but still want to be social. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_1fjtze", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Finally took the plunge and started NC", "post": "It's just over a month since I broke up with my SO. We've seen each other a couple of times since our mutual breakup and he has helped me through some tough personal times since then, but things got really hard for me after I slept with him over a weekend trip away with some mutual friends. I just miss him and regret ever agreeing to our mutual breakup without ever really voicing what I wanted. \n\nI'd like to think that we will still remain close and supportive friends, and I hope we do, but being able to see his Facebook and follow his every move was just destroying me and making my depression all the more difficult to deal with. Which is why I've (finally) decided to start NC and just get on with myself. I've unfriended him and it was hard but very liberating. I know I'll certainly see him in person in the near future again due to our mutual friends and common interests, but knowing that I don't have to speak to him again unless it's on my terms is both painful and good.\n\nIt has been a horrible, painful, depressing ride but lurking around here in /r/Breakups and seeing that I'm not alone has helped a lot. Thanks everyone.", "summary": "broke up a month ago, stayed in contact, made things difficult for myself. Finally initiated NC and feel better even though I want to keep talking to him..."}
{"id": "t3_4fplod", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[NSFW] BF [22 m] and I [23 f] can't agree on this boundary", "post": "Together 2 years.  I'm using a throw away because this is a bit of an awkward problem I don't want associated with my main.\n\nMy boyfriend and I are pretty good at compromising, and have always been good about approaching the problem as a team. However, the current discussion we're having is something we've been unable to compromise on.\n\nMy boundaries are pretty strongly associated with interaction. So while I have no problem with my bf looking at porn or gonewild or whatever, commenting or messaging someone on those or other mediums is not okay. \n\nI found out fairly recently that my bf downloaded mods for a popular game that allow you to \"have sex\" with other characters, and that he had specifically downloaded characters, characters with certain appearances, and some characters resembling celebrities. \n\nWhen I found this out I was very upset. Maybe a bit of an overreaction, but I think that's because I saw his comments on subreddits talking about these mods and characters, and a comment that basically crossed the line for me because it was on a nsfw photo album. \n\nWe discussed it, we cried. I reiterated my strong feelings about interaction and commenting and he apologized and said he understood. He suggested he should uninstall the game and mods.\n\nNow he wants to reinstall the game, and had been planning on re-installing the same mods. \n\nWe can't come to a compromise. He feels that the modding is basically porn and is therefore fair game and none of my business. I feel that the modding (and involvement with selecting new mods, new characters and involvement with the modding community) is too interactive and is something I'm not comfortable with, as I feel it crosses the boundaries of our relationship.", "summary": "Boyfriend was using sex mods on a video game and somewhat involved with the community and wants to continue. I'm not comfortable with that. Is there any way we can reach a compromise on this?"}
{"id": "t3_23rrcs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my boyfriend [21 M] of 7 months, only likes to text me to talk. Driving me crazy", "post": "My bf only likes to talk to me through text. I'm all for texting with people about small stuff, but having a conversation via text is difficult. It's impossible to say everything you want to say without writing an essay and there is tons of room for miscommunication. I find that the conversation are very superficial when texting. Mostly they go like \"Hey\" \"How are you what are you doing\" etc. I'm getting bored with superficial talk. I crave more deeper and intellectually stimulating conversations. He says he hates talk on the phone and when I call him, he has nothing to say and sounds bored. I offered to video chat or something, but he doesn't want to try. \nWe don't see each other often, so we end up going long periods of time without seeing or hearing each other, only texting. I feel no connection when we text. He sees no problem with this. Am I wrong to be annoyed?", "summary": "Boyfriend only likes to talk through text. He sees no issue with it. Am I wrong to be annoyed by this?"}
{"id": "t3_1dgok4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "For people who are atheists (r/atheism), why do you poke fun at Catholics for believing in the Catholic God?", "post": "While I don't condone every negative action of the Catholic religion, I think its cruel to be mean to them. \n\nWhile I am Atheist, I can understand why some people follow religion. I don't hate or make derogatory terms to people who choose to believe in a god. \n\nI don't make fun of Catholics because I can understand why they believe in a religion. They want a reason to believe in life after death because death is a scary concept. A lot of people on reddit make it seem like religion is a horrible thing. While I am firm on my atheist stance, I love the fact that religion existed because it defines our history as a human race. People need religion to explain things they cannot understand or cope with. Whats wrong with not facing reality?\n\nAs an atheist, we have to accept that we are just a tiny speck in the entire universe. I think its logical to assume that people refuse to believe that because it sounds negative. Why must we poke fun at the uneducated and delusional?", "summary": "Why can't Atheists understand that some people need religion because they can't cope with reality? Is it alright to make fun of people who can't cope with reality?"}
{"id": "t3_4bmiu7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help me save this situation!!!", "post": "Hi guys,\n\nSo this guy [21M], say Chuck, and I [23M] know this girl [21M] Gloria, let's say. Chuck and I hang out at this regular spot and so have chit-chatted and learned that Gloria has flirted with us both on separate occasions and both of us agreed that she was a helluva catch -pretty, witty, musical, etc. The way that we talked about her was in a respectful \"man, I'd like to get to know her, she's really cool\".\n\nAnyways, up until yesterday, we didn't know Gloria was available. So my buddy comes up to me a few days into it and says \"guess who swiped right?\" It was her! Now he's not very good at starting tinder conversations, so I just up and tell him to give her my number (as a joke, but play it off). I'm thinking to myself \"hell yeah I want her to have my number!\" \n\nAnyways, he texts \"Jimmy wants you to have his number 555-5555 and here's mine 555-5555\" and I feel like this is still in the realm of funny. But then he goes ahead and puts \"choose wisely\" which I'm worried might be too dead pan. I'm initially not too worried about it because when I last saw Gloria, we had the comfort level (with each other) of cracking sex and masturbating jokes. \n\nI can play this off in person, but text is pretty hard. And if we scare her from coming back it might come to this. So, over tinder, unless how can he do a follow-up to reconcile this situation and/or let her see the situation as the stupid fumbling of two young dudes that it is?", "summary": "2 guys like a girl. One guy gets a swipe right form her on tinder. Other guy convinces his friend to send their numbers as an ice breaker. How do we convince her this is a funny and not creepy scenario?"}
{"id": "t3_298sjb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [22/M] is a little uncomfortable with me [22/F] returning my ex's things. [dating for 4 months]", "post": "Hey r/relationships, slightly petty concern ahead!\n\nI recently told my boyfriend very candidly and openly that I needed to return my ex's stuff. My boyfriend had mentioned early on in the relationship that he was nervous about my feelings towards my ex considering I moved into this relationship just 3 months after I broke up with him. When I heard of these concerns, I immediately deleted my ex off facebook and my phone hoping I could quell his worries. He is still friends with his ex on facebook, and I have not said anything because I am trying to not let stuff like that bother me. \n\nHe has some trust issues, and when I mentioned bringing my ex's stuff back he fell silent. I asked him if he trusted me and he said \"I'll have to.\" I asked him how I could do it to make him feel better and he suggested I tell my ex to pick up the stuff from my place. I agreed that I would try but while I think that making him feel is my first priority, I feel a little rude for asking my ex to make the trip. \n\nHe promised he would work on these trust issues, but when I mentioned it to him, he kindly said that although he knew what kind of person I am, knew what to expect, but I had to \"build a rapport\" to maintain and prove that the trust was warranted. I was a little confused because I felt like I deserve to be trusted initially, as I trust him, but perhaps we have different viewpoints.\n\nAre his views on trusting people warranted? Am I an idiot because I trust people too easily? What else can I do to build this trust?", "summary": "My boyfriend doesn't want me to go and drop off my ex's things because of trust issues and wants me to ask him to drive by and pick them up."}
{"id": "t3_1fbs0a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27f] want to propose to my boyfriend [25m] on our 5 year anniversary.", "post": "Boyfriend and I have been together for almost five years (August 30th!), in the most loving and amazing relationship I think anyone could ask for. We value the same things, make each other laugh until we cry (or fart), love each other's families, share interests, and respect one another's personal time and space. I can see myself with this man in 60 years, two old farts having a laugh at our grandchildren's expense. He is my guy, and I am his gal. That's really all there is to it. Also, the sex is AMAZEBALLS.\n\nI know he wants to marry me, but I feel like he's waiting until the \"right time\". Waiting until we are a little more financially stable, until blah blah blah. I think within a year or two we will be financially ready to move into a larger place and get a dog and do all that \"pre-kids\" marriage stuff. A nice long engagement, and we're all set.\n\nI want to propose. Personally, I think he'd get a kick out of it. He comes from a long line of feminists. I don't think he'd say \"no\", and really my biggest fear is that I'd steal his thunder. I have something truly spectacular in mind, but would like Reddit's take on it before I do something crazy.\n\nWhat do you think, guys? Should I go for it, or wait to see if he possibly pops the question first?", "summary": "I want to propose to my boyfriend of five years, but don't want to steal his thunder. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_1jbgpm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey guys, do you know how to get a ridiculous hospital bill reduced??? Details inside.", "post": "I had a bike accident and broke my wrist and separated my shoulder and some road rash. I went to the hospital where I waited 4 hours to get an x-ray. I was also given pain medication that was injected to me without telling me how much each shot would cost. They injected me about 4 times total. They also cleaned some of the road rash and put a temporary cast on me and referred me to another doctor. This cost me $1867. This seems a little unfair. I did not ask for pain meds nor was I told how much it would cost me. Do any of you know if I have something going here? Do any of you have a success story from a similar situation???", "summary": "Hospital charged me a butt load for stuff, one of which I did not even ask for nor was a told how much it would cost. Do you know what channel I should go through to get my bill reduced?"}
{"id": "t3_e74mh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Perhaps you can help with my medical problems", "post": "First, stomach cant burp almost. It wants to, but the mechanism to burp seemed fucked up. It cant burp, so I get sick, and it tries to eject everything instead. I hate eating now, since it hurts from the first few bites. And then after I eat a meal it hurts. Lots of discomfort. I have to force myself to eat sometimes. But, could that be due to saliva or something? I noticed when I throw up its...weird. Its like a blob of spit almost...could that be due to swollen tonsils? They stay big, but when I get sick, they get even bigger and hurt. I cant eat or drink for a few days. Also, my lymph nodes kinda get like a ball shape you can feel...\n\nAnyway, that one is not so bad I guess. Ive been smoking MJ, and even with that I cant eat. But If I smoke a LOT, then I can at least eat a few bites. So, found a fix..\n\nThe sleep problem seems to be destroying me right now. I cant sleep from the time 11-2 is seems. For the last year at least. I have hypnagogia, so I play a \"movie\" or dream before I fall asleep fully. Ill be in the deepest thought you can ever have, and it will play automatically. Its sorta like inception. But after the movie, usually around 30 minutes, ill wake up. but lately ive been catching myself even before that. when it starts, ill think, wtf am i thinking about, and then be like, DAMN. When I finally fall asleep, i feel im not sleeping deep. Or if I do, no more than a hour. I wake up exhausted. I never get the tired feeling/sensation/chemical until the day. I take a nap, and I feel so much more rested after a few hours. But I cant take naps during the day everyday. Even if I dont nap, Ill be god damn tired all day. Then 11 comes and im fucking wide awake. Its hell. Weekend or weekday I cant sleep at night. Ive tried just about all the things they tell you to do. None work.", "summary": "cant get tired to trigger at night. only during day. and if wait until night, it goes away. also something with tonsils, but dont worry too much about that."}
{"id": "t3_2adscz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Update Me [38 M] trying to figure out if my wife [34] of 2.5 years, cheated on me in the past", "post": "[Original post](\n\nOkay I finally talked to my wife. I was really nervous and tried to set up a good opportunity. When it got as good as I though it was going to get I just said \"So, did anything ever happen between you and dude?\" Not the smooth delivery I had hoped to make.\n\nShe said \"You mean like romantically? No, no never.\" She seemed very sincere, and I believed her right away.\n\nI went on to tell her all of the reasons I was worried, and she was very understanding. She was upset that I didn't trust her.  She did start crying when I told her about my fears that our daughter might not have been mine. She was upset that I would even think that, which is what I anticipated, and one of the main reasons I waited so long to tell her.\n\nI put her in my shoes and asked how she would feel if a female coworker of mine acted in a similar way. It seemed like she hadn't considered that, and she admitted to being jealous and insecure in the past, which made me feel better.\n\nShe made lots of reassurances that if she was ever unhappy enough in our relationship that she would think about seeing someone else, that she would let me know things were bad way before it got to that point.\n\nIt's hard to describe how you can tell someone is telling the truth, but I could really tell. Unless she is some kind of amazing liar, which I think I would have known about after 16 years.\n\nShe did defend her douchey friend's actions a little, which I was bothered by. She said he always says things like that and doesn't really mean anything by it. I still think he's just a dipshit. I told her I didn't want to hang out with him and his wife anymore. We have moved 1200 miles away from where they are now, so it doesn't really matter.\n\nSo, yeah I am the paranoid insecure jackass that I was hoping I was.\n\nThank you all for your thoughts and advice.", "summary": "I asked her straight out if anything had ever happened between her and tactless shithead. She told me no, very convincingly. I am the ass."}
{"id": "t3_2e6kkv", "subreddit": "running", "title": "There's something to be said for some time off", "post": "Last month (July 19th to be exact) I went for a 6 mile run and totally blew my knee. I RICE'd it and saw my PT, but no matter what I was doing I still had to take some time off of running.\n\nI got really depressed pretty much right away and in an effort to keep myself sane I turned all of my normal running energy to strength training. I had been running about 25 miles per week, 5 days per week, and did two short (15 minute) basic calisthenics workouts on short run days.\n\nWhen I had to stop running I started working out 4 days a week doing about 30-40 minutes on a hill climber set to maximum incline and resistance and was doing about 30-40 minutes of core and upper body strength training. Over the last 5 weeks, no running, I have unintentionally dropped about 3 pounds with no dietary change. I tripled the number of push up I can do and I quadrupled the length of time I can hold plank.\n\nBut here's the amazing part- today I went out for my first run since July 19th and I felt so good and so light, yet strong. I felt fast but I told myself that it was probably just because it'd been so long. But when I checked my pace at the end- sure enough it was about 25 seconds faster than my old \"normal\" pace. In fact, my pace was the fastest I've ever run that distance (3 miles). And I didn't stop running because my body had to, I felt like I could've kept going for another hour at that same pace! I only stopped because I didn't want to go from zero to 60 and risk reinjury. I feel like a million bucks!", "summary": "Took 5 weeks off for an injury and concentrated on strength training and my first day back to running was fast and easier than ever before!"}
{"id": "t3_1wi662", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my boyfriend [27 M] of 1 year, on a break because of his lost desire for sex.", "post": "We went a few days without talking at all so I finally ask him what's up. He keeps saying he can't explain it but he's sorry and that the fire is gone from the relationship. We meet up to talk about it in person and he says he lately has no sex drive, asks me why we need to have sex every time we hang out (2-3 times per week usually).\n\nThis made me feel really insecure and took my self-esteem down a notch but told him I wanted to fix it. His solution was to keep on doing everything else the same but just take a break from sex to see if that fixes things. I feel that there is an underlying issue with the relationship such as him just losing interest because we've been together for a while. So I suggested a break from seeing each other/talking entirely and see how it feels.\n\nOn my end it feels like shit. I want to call him just to talk about our day or to say I miss him. I don't want to sound pathetic or desperate to him. It gets a little easier each day so I'm wondering if I should break it off completely so there's no lingering hope of getting back together. That's the only way I see myself truly moving on.\n\nShould I stay in a relationship where he is confused about his feelings and physically uninterested? Or should I break things off and try to move on?", "summary": "No sex drive on his end, wondering if this is underlying emotional problem and whether I should stay in the relationship at all."}
{"id": "t3_43jw7h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Person I'm dating (both 24[f]24[f]) broke our exclusivity rules. Worth saving?", "post": "Been together approximately one month, however have not firmly spoken about the boundaries of the relationship apart from deleting dating apps and saying we weren't seeing anyone else. We decided we weren't ready to use any form of labels or terms yet\n\nIt's been going well, met each other's friends etc except today she discloses that she slept with someone approximately 1 week ago. It's someone who she previously was interested in a romantic relationship but rejected her. She stated that she was enjoying what we had etc, and she feels this person would not have a relationship with her,\n\nAt the moment I have let her cool off (she's feeling a lot of guilt, confusion) and have told her to have a think. I think I'm happy to continue if she is able to prioritise and choose me, and really work on this. This might involve having to drop contact with the person she cheated with However it feels so early to be having to work on our relationship. I feel like if she doesn't immediately know then it's not worth it\n\nWhat would you do? Say? Would you even consider continuing? Under what conditions?", "summary": "been together less than a month, she cheated and is appropriately remorseful. However has a soft spot  for the person she cheated on and I've no idea what to do"}
{"id": "t3_xj9lv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what kind of effect do you think that crime shows/movies might have in reducing the occurrence of thought-out, \"intelligent\" crime?", "post": "I had this thought a few days ago when watching an episode of NCIS and they did the usual \"create a super high resolution image from a very low resolution image.\" I got to wondering how much of it is real and how much of it is fake (or, conversely, how much might be under-exaggerated). Based on these types of shows/movies (bank robbery, conning, etc.) where the bad guy nearly 100% of the time gets caught, only an idiot would think it would be a good idea to do any of this stuff, and from my [limited] knowledge of the general criminal, I'm under the impression that they are mainly uneducated people in dire situations (or psychopaths/mentally unstable.. but I'm thinking mostly with regards the heist type of crime -- not assault or murder) that are driven to extreme lengths to make the \"easy\"/\"quick\" dollar. So I wondered, is it possible that these shows/movies that show the criminal, no matter how smart and creative, almost always getting caught could actually be (subconsciously or consciously) reducing the amount of more well thought through crime throughout the world?", "summary": "Could broadcasting hugely technologically advanced law enforcement always being able to catch the criminals be a way of making \"smarter\" people automatically not consider a life of crime?"}
{"id": "t3_4a7qz1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] don't understand my crush [25 F] absolutely anymore", "post": "So I've known this girl for almost 3 years now. We dated a little while when we met, but as soon as things started to get little bit more serious, she moved to Australia for 2 years (in my defence, she had the tickets bought before we started dating).\n\nNow last november she came back, at that time I was at sea (working in the Navy). Since February we've been seeing each other again, been to the movies, restaurants, just hung out at each other's places etc, it's been fun. \n\nCouple days ago I asked her, what does she think about a relationship, to which she replied that she's not really looking for anything serious. I reluctantly agreed. Since we've known each other for some time now, I won't start ignoring her just for that, better to stay friends. \n\n2 days ago I had a party at my place, to which she came also. By time others fell asleep, we stayed up the whole night, drank and watched some stupid cartoons and spooned like there's no freakin tomorrow (got horrible blue balls from that). For a girl, who told she's not looking for a relationship, that was kind of odd thing to do, am I looking at \"friends with benefits\" kind of invitation or something? Confused af.\n\nSorry for long post, let there be a invisible potato.", "summary": "girl i've liked for a long time told me that she doesn't want a relationship right now but 2 days later proceeded to spoon with me the whole night."}
{"id": "t3_360oxo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my wife [26 F] 5 years together, Third week into our trial separtation", "post": "5 weeks ago I came home from work and my wife told me that she would be moving out in a week and a half. \n\nWe are in the third week of her moving out. I am in our house that we bought 2 years ago and the daily reminders of her being gone are finally settling. I feel like I am the only one trying to make this relationship work right now. My heart broke when she left and I am trying to rebuild trust in her so that we can be happy if she decides to come home. \n\nShe has been in therapy for 2 years and I just started 4 weeks ago. I am coming to many realizations and am confronting the issues that I made in our relationship. I know that now that I have seen that fear was controlling me I never want to go back to that dark place again. She tells me that she is afraid of feeling trapped in the relationship and not being able to keep her voice to ask for what she wants. \n\nTonight we had a phone call. (The happen every 2-3 nights) I asked her if she was leaning to one side or the other in terms of coming home. She is against the relationship right now. She isn't working on rebuilding the relationship, she is trying to figure out if she wants the relationship at all. \n\nShe is the most important person in my life. I love her so much and it hurts an unthinkable amount that she doesn't want to try.\n\nHow do I maintain my trust in her with her crushing my hope so heartlessly? What do I have to say to let her know that I am making so much emotional progress and positive growth?", "summary": "Wife left for a trail separation and just told me she is leaning away from even trying to rebuild the relationship. How can I keep the hope and trust alive? How can I let her see I am changing for the better?"}
{"id": "t3_2pbqx7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[30 M] Can a relationship work with no chemistry?", "post": "I'm kind of a unique situation... 30 years old never had a gf, never done anything sexual, just recently started online dating.  (Reason for my lack of experience is being extremely shy, low self esteem)  Reason I've started online dating is an attempt to salvage what's left of my life.. figured even though I wasted so much of my life at this point there's no reason I should just die as a lonely virgin, so i decided to at least TRY.\n\nAfter about ~5 or so weeks I've met two girls so far, got at least one more to meet in the near future.  Problem is, I am a bit awkward (Ok, I am a lot awkward.)  I feel like I do not \"click\" with anyone, and would not really know how to flirt, etc.  Question is this: how important/real is this \"chemistry\" thing?  If I don't feel anything, is it possible to develop these feelings over time?\n\nIn other words, should I force the relationship forward just because I so desperately want one?  Or should I move on when I don't detect this \"chemistry\" thing, and have the gross audacity to actually *turn down* an attractive female when I'm a 30 year old desperate virgin?\n\nDating and relationships are just so alien to me and I have no idea what I'm doing or how to even interact with the opposite sex.  At times I feel I'm being irresponsible even trying, and I have no right to date anyone :/", "summary": "Can a relationship work without chemistry if you and your partner do not \"click\" with each other?  Can these feelings develop over time if you force it?"}
{"id": "t3_3h9fij", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By trying to have two females hook up in my backyard.", "post": "So this happened about 20 minutes ago.\n\nI was in the back yard, replacing a damaged sprinkler head. I dug up the old one, and removed it when I noticed that the hole was slowly filling with muddy water. It was so murky, I could not see the bottom of this 5 inch deep hole. So, I get the new sprinkler, attach a 1 inch male coupling to the bottom, and then attach another 1 inch female coupling to that, so that the new sprinkler would sit a little higher, therefore be more visible while mowing. I lower this into hole, and start twisting, hoping that it will snag onto what I had assumed was another male end at the bottom.\n\nAfter doing this for about 2 or 3 minutes, I am starting to get frustrated. I reach in there to feel around, but the hole is too narrow for my grizzly-like hands. I try using towels to get the water out, to no avail. I try to widen the hole by using said water to turn dirt walls into mud, so that my hand might fit better. At this point, I am ten seconds away from making the hole larger using a shovel, and possibly having more dirt and debris fall in, when I look up at the old sprinkler head. I realize my foolishness. Attached to the bottom of it is the male coupling that I had been attempting to attach my female coupling to.\n\nI pop off the new female coupling, sink that sprinkler in, give it a good twist, and vam, bam, boosh. Filled up the hole, and am now sitting here, glad none of my friends were around. After realizing my mistake, I had it done and said with, within 1 minute.", "summary": "Tried to get two female couplings to fit together, wouldn't work, got it to work by getting male in there."}
{"id": "t3_4fx598", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Costa Rica, Nicaragua, or...?", "post": "R/travel, you guys have been good to me, helped my wife and I put together a killer 2 week tour de Spain, both of our first times out of the country.\n\nNow we are looking at a 7-8 day trip in 2016, maaaybe early 2017. Weighing out what both wife and I want, ideally we could get:\n  -relaxation \n  -zip lining (wife says zip lining is a must)\n  -relatively easy travel from west coast (avoiding jet lag on such a short itinerary)\n  -no car rental (fine w cabs/ trains/ bus)\n  -if we're doing a relaxing vacation, I'd love if we could be on the beach\n  -other activities: day hikes, snorkel, kayak??\n  - good food/ drink hopefully!!\n\nI was trying to figure out where to get started on a Costa Rica itinerary, when someone strongly suggested Nicaragua. Part of my downfall is trying to do too much, so help me keep it simple :). 1-2 locations over 8 days would be perfect.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "need destination for 8 days of beach relaxation, good food, and some adventure. Flying out of SAN or LAX."}
{"id": "t3_2y72rm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my romantic interest [18 F] 2 weeks, not sure what to do", "post": "Hello /r/relationships. I've been dating this girl for 2 weeks (only had one date, we're both in the army so it's kinda complicated), but we've known each other for two years, and been great friends for over a year. We've had a hiatus after some ugly things surfaced, but lately we got in touch, and I decided to ask her out, because I'm 18 and never actually had a girlfriend or even a date before.\n\nSo we went out and whatnot, but no touching or whatever occurred. While I'd usually be concerned she's not interested in me, knowing her personality, she's quite shy and somewhat fears touching and whatnot, so it's understandable. \n\nTomorrow we're going on another date, and I was wondering if to just flow with the situation, or somewhat push forwards and ask her if she wants a more serious relationship, i.e. actually be a couple. While she shies away from contact, when you approach her with these things, she's honest and says whatever's on her mind. So I was wondering if I should or shouldn't do so - because we've been good friends for over a year, we know each other well, so is it worth bothering going on regular dates or should I just try and \"force\" the issue on her?", "summary": "Known her for over two years, been on one date, want to know if to try and force the issue of relationships onto her or not."}
{"id": "t3_19tfte", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18m) asked her (18f) to marry me a month into the relationship, and she said yes, but...", "post": "I'm (18m) roughly a month into this relationship with a girl (18f) who has turned my entire world around, and we can't get enough of each other. We go to college together and see each other all the time. We agree on every single issue that has come up in news and in society: abortion, marriage rights, how to raise kids, religion, etc, etc. We spend easily over 6 hours together a day about 5/7 days a week and have told each other things we have never told anyone else before. I have no doubt in her, nor her in I. And she did say yes to my proposal.\n\nHowever, my parents, and her parents both know that we have only been together about a month now, and I am just curious how it is we should clue them in on this situation in the least freak the hell out sort of way possible... Her and I both more or less come to a blank on this. We also don't plan on getting married until 2015 when we're out of school, or at least transferring. Any help on this would be great.", "summary": "I asked a girl to marry me very early in a relationship, she said yes, we're excited for it but don't know how or when to tell family/others."}
{"id": "t3_12vzes", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redditors: Have you been hit on by a manager that's different sexual orientation that knew you were not the same preference?  Good or bad outcomes that came from it?", "post": "While in HS I worked at a theme park over several summers.  I went back one more year in college and a former supervisor had been promoted to a very high up position.  I was living close to his house and he asked if I wanted to hang out sometime.  I didn't think anything of it.  I knew he and his wife had divorced and figured he wanted to have an excuse to go to the bar.  \n\nWe had a few drinks and went back to his place for a couple more drinks as the bar closed.  He switched from beer to some heavily poured mixed drinks at a fast pace.  He began to talk about his life and got into some DEEP shit, and got emotional.  I just kept listening trying not to be a douche, thinking maybe I am helping.  Then he started saying \"I haven't felt so close to anyone like this before\".  I said \"that's understandable, you are talking about some heavy stuff\". He kept going saying \" I feel like I want to hug you.  Maybe hold you if you want to sit over here\".  I told him I was comfortable where I was.  He kept going and I politely got up to leave and he changed his tune quickly.  He tried to give me a hug at the door but I switch it to a handshake.  I felt bad but not much I could do.  He was ten years older, two levels higher than my boss, and most importantly I am straight.\n\nA couple of weeks later I did something at work that would have been cause for immediate termination (one of those bureaucratic safety things where no one could have been hurt but it's just a rule).  He was in charge that day and he changed the violation to a lesser offense that allowed me to keep my job.", "summary": "My boss' boss' boss' (male) hit on me (straight male) and I turned him down during his emotional moment.  He saved my job a couple weeks later."}
{"id": "t3_45siru", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [20F] and I [22M] of over 1 Year are having issues regarding differing views on Sex before marriage and living together. I really need some advice or other experiences here, please help Reddit.", "post": "Essentially, my girlfriend believes in the whole Sex after Marriage and no Living together till marriage whilst I believe the opposite and after 1 Year and 2 months it's starting to get messier. \n\nTo start off, a little back story; my girlfriend is of Christian background and I'm not, and she did tell me she didn't want sex before marriage about 4 months into the relationship. A but late, but I respect people's decisions and don't want to push them into these things. She's a Virgin, I'm not, but I thought this girl was awesome and though \"fuck it, not worth breaking up just because she doesn't want sex\". \n\nSo recently, Valentine's day, I (stupidly) brought up the situation of living together and sex before marriage, I always saw sex as an important part of a relationship and a way to intimately connect with your S/O and express your love. I also feel that living together before marriage is a great test, because some people cannot stand living together even when in a relationship. My girlfriend believes all this should happen after marriage. \n\nA part of me feels like it's her parents who are also heavily influencing her decisions, she always brings it back to disappointing her parents with her decisions. Whilst I respect that, some times I feel her parents are controlling her indirectly. Am I wrong to think this?\n\nSo after an argument last night, my girlfriend and I came to the point of \"do we break up, or wait till marriage\". And I'm left here really confused and stuck. I don't want to break up but at the same time I'm so worried,confused and I feel like I'm missing something now. Have you been in this situation? Do you have any advice that can help me? What are your views....I'm at a stump and I'm scared I'll make the wrong decision.", "summary": "My girlfriend believes in sex after marriage and living together after marriage, I believe the opposite, arguments happened, might break up, what do I do? Don't want to make the wrong decision."}
{"id": "t3_49xoji", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure if husband [25M] is angry at me for not being sure if I'm in love with him or not.", "post": "I love my husband sometimes, but I don't love him all of the time. I may feel bad for him sometimes, and try to love him out of pity, but I know that isn't love. I just had to get that off of my chest. \n\nMy husband knows that I loved him enough to have given my virginity to him. \n\nI don't like it when he guilt trips me to try to get into my pants faster when I don't feel like having sex.\n\nSometimes I'm not sure why I married my husband. I hope that it's not out of pity. I'm scared that if he ever finds out that I get guilt tripped easily into \"love\", he'll get angry that I may not love him as much as he loves me.\n\nWhat should I do? I'm scared that he has already figured it out that I may never love him as much as he loves me.", "summary": "Not sure if husband [25M] is angry at me for not being sure if I'm in love with him or not."}
{"id": "t3_1pq03v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[28]Female with this guy[31] I've been dating for 3 months. He has so many beautiful friends that are girls...Hard to not be jealous/insecure.", "post": "So I've known him for a few years now, but only recently have we started dating. He's definitely someone that I care about and he hasn't given me any reason to doubt his sincerity.(so far)\n\nBUT, the hardest thing is that he goes out dancing a lot (that's where I met him and we do that regularly) and has SO many friends that are girls. They are beautiful, smart, fun, creatures and sometimes it's just really hard to trust that he's really just interested in me only. \n\nHis Best Friend is a girl.. that CONSTANTLY facebooks him \"I love YOU!!\" etc... and it's just so uncomfortable.", "summary": "What should I do?? I really don't want my insecurities to ruin this, but it's just so insidious- this feeling."}
{"id": "t3_2jrg3m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The guy (25 male) I've (24 female) been seeing for a month went through my ipod (the photos) after I accidentally forgot it in his car, how upset should I be?", "post": "I had given him the passcode the day before while I was driving so he could change the music.\n\nPrior to this I had been very clear about having trust issues and really enjoying my privacy. He claims that if the tables had been turned and I looked through his photos he wouldn't have cared in the slightest. \n\nIn his defense he was slightly sleep deprived...and although he apologized he thought most people he knew wouldn't react the way i was and thought I was being overly sensitive. \n\nFor the record, there were no inappropriate pics but there were some embarrassing selfies i had taken while drunk, lol. So I'm pretty mortified and honestly that's contributing to my anger. The bottom line is that I feel it was an invasion of privacy and it says a lot about him, what do you guys think?", "summary": "Guy I've been dating went through the pics on my ipod after I forgot it in his car, should I end it?******"}
{"id": "t3_1fkpep", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it normal for me(21m) to be uncomfortable with her(18f) posting nude pics of herself on Tumblr?", "post": "My gf of just over a year sometimes posts nude pics of herself on her Tumblr and I'm really uncomfortable with it. I feel like such a hypocrite because I was fine about us posting in r/GW, It was my idea. posting pics of yourself to anonymous strangers for shits n' giggles is fine with me, But when it's on her Tumblr it isn't really anonymous at all, it's mostly her friends, be it male or female. She isn't posting smut, It's pretty tasteful for the most part. I'm just really uncomfortable about the idea of her friends seeing her naked. Is it normal for me to not be ok with this, or am I just being stupid and jealous? How would you feel in this situation?", "summary": "gf posts nude pics of herself on Tumblr, I'm not really not ok with it. Am I overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_2xcwac", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Don't know if (or how) I [22F] should tell my boyfriend [25M] I really don't like what he got me for Christmas.", "post": "Yeah I realize it is now a long time since Christmas and this part of my dilemma, which I guess is my own fault. So for Christmas my boyfriend (of ~10 months) got me a gift certificate for a \"makeover and photoshoot\".  I can't really imagine doing anything much worse than spending my day having my hair and make-up done than having my photo taken for two hours. Okay, maybe a bit dramatic but I'm really not that kind of girl and my boyfriend does know that. I guess he could be hinting that he wants me to dress up a bit more but I didn't really think he cares \u2013 I think it is more likely that someone told him it was a good gift idea or something he got for an ex that they really liked.\n\nAnyway, I pretended I liked it and hoped he would maybe forget about it and I wouldn't have to use it. But, more recently he keeps asking me when I'm going to go and if I've booked it yet. I'm all \"oh yeah I'll do it soon I'm so busy at the moment\", which is obviously not an excuse I can carry on forever. So my question is should tell him I don't want to go? I would feel bad because it has been a long time now that I've pretended and he probably did put quite a bit of thought in what to get me. Also what if I do tell him, what would be the best way to bring it up without sounding like an ungrateful bitch? Or should just suck it up and go? Obviously I could make it through, especially if I had a drink or something before to help me enjoy it a bit more but I really don't want to. Any advice is appreciated.", "summary": "My boyfriend gave me a gift certificate for a makeover and photoshoot that I really don't want to go to. Don't know if (or how) I should tell him, or if I should just go."}
{"id": "t3_4wsu0i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] having a crush on [22 F] and I need advice", "post": "Ok, So I need some advice here or just someone who tells me its gonna be OK.\nI have a hard time talking about feelings and such with my IRL-friends so here goes: Im 29, been single for 2 years now (been through some hookups/one night stands and such). I met this girl a couple of months ago,we had sex on the first date,the second but not the two times we have met after that. And I havent been thinking about this girl alot but recently I have, we text and we snapchat, and im starting to feel something. Problem is she's seeing and sleeping with another guy, she's open about that and thats ok.. Ive slept around a little aswell since we are just dating,its quite casual as you would say. But im not dating/seeing anyone else but her. I dont even know how much I like this girl, she's 22, and thats too young. Anyway, recently my life's been going downhill, Im a bit lost, dont really know what job I want and such.... fuck this isnt even making much sense, I know im supposed to be cool with it, I know its casual,I know we are not exclusive. I know all this. this is eating me up!", "summary": "dating a much younger girl,shes dating another guy at the same time, and I feel messed up. Need advice or maybe I just want to ventilate..."}
{"id": "t3_r9ubw", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I think i fucked it up, salvage advice/confirmation of negligible potential sought", "post": "My story is, (24m)i have been out of relationships and even have had literally no sex life for a while.  I met a girl(22f), who i think is awesome, and she has a boyfriend.  That isnt the problem.  I respectfully act as a platonic friend to the girl i originally had feelings for, and to a lesser degree her boyfriend.  Now, somehow or another while i was drunk and we were all hanging out at a bar one of her friends(19f) came up to me and started giving me compliments and all that, she posts on a sexual comment i made on fb later on that night, i get her number not very long after (next day, first time we talk on fb).  We have been meeting up to see eachother with other people around and she always kisses me, which i am loving.  I even got her to go see a big concert with me in a city thats 30 minutes away (she brought her friend tho, and we didnt do anything but kissing/a little dancing)  Yesterday i txted her early in the day and she said \"Im in a terrible fucking mood\".  I ask why, she sais its personal, so i say ok, you dont have to tell me if u dont want, as long as you still talk to me.  she sais \"okies\"  and i guess i may have danced around it to see if she would let anything else out.  \"so what are you pregnant?\" lol gawd no etc etc.   well, i finally send her a last one saying to hmu if she wants to hang/talk/wtfever.  she didnt, and instead made open facebook posts about how happy she was and shit.  \n\nheres where i fucking blew it reddit:  seeing the fb posts i txted her \"hey u up? i wanna talk to u im gettin this wierd feeling that i missed my chance or somethin...\"\n\nits 730 am.  should i just go get drunk or something and try not to think about it? cuz im kinda stewing in what closely resembles highschool style rejection.", "summary": "this girl has been meeting me, kissing me a lot, i think she met another dude, what can i do to help myself in this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_g3osh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I convert a print book to an ebook?", "post": "There's a book I'd like to read that isn't available as an ebook.  I'm perfectly willing to buy a DRM-laden ebook version of this book, but it's simply not available.  I bought hard copy of this book (actually 3 books, but that's splitting hairs) but, being a techie, I'd really much rather have an ebook.  Preferably in .pdf, .doc, .rtf, or some other flexible, easy-to-use format.\n\nThere has to be some way of turning a physical book into an ebook other than individually scanning each and every page by hand.  I'm sure there's some kind of specialized machine that can do it, but I don't have one.  I'd be more than willing to pay for temporary access to such a device; maybe mail the book away, or bring it to a Kinkos-like place.  The thing is I can't manage to find any service that does this.  Maybe my google-fu is weak, but all I can find are websites and programs that convert one ebook format to another, and 1 or 2 services that are only intended for authors/copyright holders (and they make you sign a thing certifying that you are such).", "summary": "I own a physical paper book that I legally bought and paid for.  I'd like to convert it into an ebook.  How can I easily do it?"}
{"id": "t3_347hex", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Dating a girl with a dog that hates men - How do I overcome this adversity and make this pooch at least tolerate me?", "post": "Been seeing this girl and it's gotten the point where we're sleeping at each others places.  She has this dog, kind of a poodle or something (not exactly sure on the breed, small, white, kind of curly hair).  She (dog) is cool in the dog park, pretty decent on a leash, but in her own dwelling, does not like men.\n\nDog has no history of abuse by men, but the dog does not like men.  She is pretty territorial and barks when I even get close to her closet door (where she keeps the dog when I'm around, it's a huge closet, no sketchy neglect or anything).\n\nGetting to the point where I have to meet this small beast and make nice-nice.  What is the best way to do so?  Apparently, she nips at hands/heels and will just stare me down and growl the entire time.  Should I arrive with treats?  I've raised pups on my own and never had a problem but mostly German shepherds and Dobermans.  Never thought I'd struggle with a poodle.  \n\nAny help or tips would be great.", "summary": "Dating a girl that has a dog that hates men and I have to overcome this, or at least attempt to do so."}
{"id": "t3_3lgd8j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my fianc\u00e9e [27 F] 3 years, she proposed to me over a year ago and has been pressuring me to \"counter propose\" ever since.", "post": "Our relationship has been great the past 3 years.  We rarely fight and we have a lot of fun together.\n\nBackstory: over a year ago I ended up helping her with a medical issue and took her to the hospital to be treated for dehydration.  Carrying her in my arms, the whole nine yards.  She felt extreme gratitude afterwards and decided to throw tradition out the window by buying a pair of wedding rings and proposed to me, taping the whole thing using her laptop and recited a speech for me.  She liked it, so she put a ring on it.\n\nWe've been pumped about getting married ever since then, and have been waiting for her to be done with graduate school before we officially drop the money to tie the knot.\n\nThe problem is that in my mind, and from what we've been telling everyone, we are officially engaged and that she proposed to me.  She's been wanting me ever since to do a counter-proposal, where I basically propose back, and have a whole long written confession of my love for her.  Now, I obviously have no problem in doing so, but she said she feels like until I do so our engagement is \"fake\" (her words).\n\nI feel like it's a bit messed up to have that sentiment.  Maybe I'm being paranoid, but I think that whatever proposal I come up with is just going to fall flat of her expectations, considering the magic of the surprise will not be there.  Not to mention, it kind of kills the mood if she is literally *asking* me to propose to her.\n\nAm I being an asshole?", "summary": "Fianc\u00e9e proposed to me, wants me to propose back but has been pestering me.  I feel like the engagement is already set, and being asked to propose kills the mood.  Am I wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_3ljh2h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (27m) am dating a married woman (27f) and we've been seeing each other for four months now. I don't know what to do.", "post": "I'll keep this brief. I always wanted to be married, want a family and kids, that hasn't changed. Dating has been crappy for me as I've been so focused on working since I come from a very poor family. I'm 27 now, doing well with my career (well enough for now anyways) so I have more \"time\" for dating.\n\nUsed Tinder for a while, had some fun flings, met a chick who was in an \"open marriage\" and just wanted to date. I thought it would be easy sex, went along with it. One thing led to another and now I love her, and she loves me. She admits this, but does not want to leave her husband (which was the first guy she ever dated, and according to her friends screams at her and manipulates her and is garbage, but it's her decision)\n\nSo, she doesn't want to leave him, loves me, I love her... I've been dating her for around four months now and I've been keeping it going hoping to build a bond with her and when I can have a 'very' serious talk with her about things I'll have more of a potential for her to consider my words about our future.\n\nI need some advice. What should I do here? Should I stop seeing her?\n\nOh, and a side note... I'm terrified this woman is my soul mate. I've been in love, dated... and never felt a connection in my life like I do with this woman. So there's that. (Sorry for broken jumbled post)", "summary": "I'm worried a married woman is my soul mate, we love each other but she also loves her husband, I'm confused, she's confused and I don't know what I should do."}
{"id": "t3_37t0w2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me(22F) with my sister(18F) and her boyfriend(17M) Should I say something?", "post": "My sister and her boyfriend have been dating for a little over a year now. They are each others first relationships. \n\nI recently got out of a 3 year abusive relationship. My anger toward my ex might be clouding my judgement but I'm not sure. \n\nFor a while I've been noticing dysfunctional things in their relationship that remind me of my ex. Her boyfriend is acting like a typical 17 year old boy and is really into the physical aspect of their relationship. My sister is borderline verbally abusive to him. She says things like, \"I don't know why you love me, maybe you shouldn't.\" I feel that she treats him poorly, is rude to him and expects way too much out of him. She tells him that we, her family hates him. I've heard them talk about getting married when he turns 18 so they can have sex without getting in trouble with my conservative Christian parents. \n\nMy sister leaves for college in the fall and I think that's creating more strain. They fight a lot more often. \n\nSo I'm wondering, do I say something to the boyfriend? I've talked to my sister but she doesn't listen, she just assumes all my words mean I hate her relationship and her. I think there's potential for mistakes, heartbreak and regrets on both their parts and I don't want that to happen. Should I talk to her boyfriend, tell him we don't hate him, we just have concerns?", "summary": "sister is really mean to her boyfriend; boyfriend wants to get married so they can have sex. I want to say something before this all blows up in their faces."}
{"id": "t3_103e7p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Reddit, I need your help with an over-protective mother.", "post": "I'm 17, and recently started seeing a 20 year old. We've become extremely close, and since I met him I've been much happier and more motivated to do well in other areas of my life. I already get good grades at a difficult school, play sports, and have never had problems with drinking or drugs. Our relationship is what keeps me balanced.\n\nMy parents have been divorced for several years, and I live with my dad nearly full time. My mother is a bit over-protective, so I anticipated some difficulty, but not like this. She thinks that the age difference is too great for somebody my age, and doesn't want me to date him. This, I understand; it's her prerogative to be concerned. It can be worked around. The real problem is that she is now trying to attack my dad legally for being a bad parent, neglecting my safety, etc. On top of this, she refuses to talk to me about how we can compromise, just insists that this is in my best interest in the long run. \n\nI've been looking for articles about how being in a stable, loving relationship is healthy for young adults (articles seem to be the best way to get through to her), but I can't find many that address the pros of teenage relationships. What I really need is to convince her that this is a healthy thing, something that falls in line with her need to 'shape me into a good young lady'.\n\nAny ideas?\n\nNote: \"you're 17, you're too young to be dating, just enjoy life and don't feel like you need to be with somebody...\" Yes, yes I know. This boy fell right out of the fucking sky, and I care about him and trust him more than almost anybody. I'm not going to give up on this just because of some age/family issues.", "summary": "my mother won't support me dating a guy 3 years my senior, is now legally attacking my dad because of it. I need to convince her that relationships like this can be healthy and good, I need her support in this."}
{"id": "t3_171byh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Roommate's boyfriend never leaves, but its more complex than it seems. Please help!", "post": "I live with some college girlfriends in a small city in a very old home. I pay rent, utilities, (which include water, gas, heat, cable, internet, etc) and my own foodstuffs since I'm on a specific diet. I have known this girl for 5 years, and she has a boyfriend that NEVER leaves. It's not like he's a typical mid twenties burnout either - he's a teacher in a great school district, makes good money, and has his own place sans roommates less than two city blocks away. \n\nBasically, he is always here. Never leaves for more than his workdays and to pick up clean clothes from his place. He literally lives here, showering, cooking, doing laundry, and hanging out in the common areas even when his girlfriend isn't here. PLus, they have loud sex every night, which doesn't really bug me, but its getting a little annoying when you have early mornings and you are awoken to a slamming headboard at 2am every night...\n\nHere is the real problem though. Many other sites that address this problem suggest that the boyfriend should chip in with rent and/or utilities. Here is the kicker - the roommate doesn't pay rent since its her fathers place. She has a joint bank account with her Dad (who is my landlord) to which she pays me the utilities that are in my name. She is a new grad and unemployed, so I know she isn't paying rent with her own money.\n\nMyself and the third roommate are getting seriously frustrated. We both work hard at out entry level jobs to make ends meet, plus the work in maintaing the house. I basically feel like I am financing their love nest, and I'm sick of it. \n\nSorry that was so long, I feel much better getting all that out.", "summary": "Roommates boyfriend never leaves but roommates Dad is my landlord. How do I get them to spend more time at their place or have him pitch up with the cost of maintaining the house?as"}
{"id": "t3_3c0grc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Missing a suitable excuse to see my[20M] long distance girlfriend[20F]", "post": "Sorry if this is the wrong subreddit for this...\nSo my girlfriend is in our home town at the moment and I'll be traveling there to see her. We both haven't told our parents about our relationship, we have talked about this so we're both comfortable with it. My parents would react extremely surprised and would immediately want to know everything about her and meet her the same day.\n\nI need a car from my parents for the whole day to see her and really need an excuse firstly why I'm in town altogether and secondly why I need a car the whole day... Can you think of an excuse that might work? I still have friends there if that helps.", "summary": "I need an excuse for my parents to use their car and see my girlfriend a whole day without them knowing I'm seeing her."}
{"id": "t3_54i2x9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my _Friend__ [23 F] 2 years of something confusing", "post": "These past couple of years I had it very rough when it came to socializing and being happy. Well, friends kinda used some drugs and I was left alone for a while I later found out...but, before that....\n\nI started to stay away from it as I lost confidence, had low self esteem,etc. I eventually and mutually met someone. I was shy but she was outgoing so I guess it evened out somehow.Asked me alot about myself and it felt good. We were going to be meeting more often so next time....when that came she randomly came over and hugged me and introduced me to some friends. We talked for a bit,said she was a bit concerned with her apperance and then she blurts out...let me give you my number, we will get lunch soon which we did. Went well. \n\nI bonded with her more and more as I saw her, got a random selfie with her which was odd, but also was called sweet for a thank you I gave her. \n\nNow there was times she was very rude or inconsiderate. She is known by others to be immature but I look past that most of the time as she did help me out. \n\nThe weirdest event was her kinda following me. I was going to a game with friends and invited her and her friends like a week in advance. Gave her a heads up and she said she was busy, so I left it at that. I go to the game and was walking around and look down and saw her and all her friends. Okay someone else could have had an idea to go but come on that was a bit weird that she showed up then and there when she basically said no. \n\nI dont want to go into too much detail to things unless needed but I didnt know if I was being played here or she liked me or it was her personality or I dont even know what. I personally grew to like her but have not seen her in a while for certain reasons.", "summary": "Met somebody for them to be nice, and rude and curious all at the same time and dont know what I should do now"}
{"id": "t3_17wnni", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Has screen-sharing been throttled on Skype and are there alternatives?", "post": "Hello friends!\n\nI am in a long distance relationship and as such Skype has been a major boon to the quality of our lives. This has been downgraded somewhat recently.\n\nMe and my girlfriend would screen-share so we could enjoy movies and episodes together. It might not seem like much but we cherished the ability. I subscribed to the Skype service solely to keep that for us. \n\nSome time ago screen-sharing just stopped being able to cope with running video. I think this was around the time Microsoft acquired Skype although I'm not sure. This is confounding since both of us still enjoy good web connections and use high definition webcams that stream very well under normal conditions. \n\nFurthermore we have discovered that if we screen-share for any reason our call is seemingly throttled and we have to recall to regain quality.\n\nI have googled this to no avail and I was wondering if anybody has any knowledge about this situation and/or knows a working alternative?", "summary": "Is the Skype screen-sharing service throttled now and are there alternatives for watching video together over the internet? Thank you."}
{"id": "t3_2msoub", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (M20) don't know of SO (F19) of 4 years is being fair.", "post": "A few months ago, we had a pretty big argument. She was upset over it, and I asked her repeatedly if there was anything that I could do to help. She said that she was fine and during the week we had tons of fun so I genuinely believed she was fine. The next few days she messaged me telling me that she's horribly sad, and that she can't believe that I let her feel sad when we were together. \n(Oh! Quick note, she lives in a college a few hours away, and comes to visit every other weekend along with her best friend.) \nNow, this isn't the first time she gas done this, this happens weekly, where she does not communicate clearly how she's feeling and what she wants me to do, then she explodes on me. \nI was furious that she would have the nerve to tell me that I didn't try to make her feel better when I had at one point begged for her to tell me how she was really feeling, so I ended things with her compulsively (over text, so a total dick move on my part). She then called me a few seconds later telling me she was sorry and that she was wrong. I told her that I made a super compulsive decision when I \"ended things\" and that I was sorry and didn't mean it at all. That I just acted without thinking.\nEverything was fine and dandy, until recently.\n This is the problem:\nNow she's telling me that she is VERY sad because I broke up with her (even after I apologized to her for doing so, and practically begged her to believe that I didn't mean it) and she says that she is feeling insecure about the relationship because I had \"ended things.\" She wants me to make it up to her by doing this grand gesture for her as a way of showing her that I really do love her (which I do) and to make her secure of this relationship. She wants me to make her feel better. And she's very upset that I have not done it yet.\n\nIs that fair of her? I don't understand how it could be, but maybe I'm wrong. And what can I do to solve this issue?", "summary": "GF is sad that I broke up (not really) with her, and now wants me to make her feel secure about the relationship again by a grand gesture."}
{"id": "t3_y2663", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[update] Gf doesn't think I put an effort into spending time with her.", "post": "Ok here is an update of a post I made yesterday. \n\nI'm 27 and she is 28.  We've been together 2 1/2 yrs. and we live together.\n\nYesterday she got mad at me over the phone for not wanting to go to the beach the next day (she was on a lunch break). After we hung up she texted me and said I never try to spend time with her. I apologized and said let's go. She said she was over it and will go with friends. \n\nAfter that she texts me and says she is going out after work with friends and wont be home until late. She also said she can't go to my friends wedding next week. \n\nShe doesn't come home  till midnight last night and when she walks in she doesn't speak to me and proceeds to watch tv in the living room and then she slept on the couch. \n\nIn the morning I wake and she is in the bed. I try to hug her but she pushes me away and says  nothing. I fall back asleep. When I wake up again she is in the living watching tv. I say good morning and she doesn't reply back. \n\nNow I'm in the bedroom and she is on the couch watching tv. I don't want to fight with her but I want us to talk out the situation.\n\nI don't know what to do reddit. Is this acceptable for a partner to be like this? Should I talk to her?", "summary": "Gf got mad at me yesterday for not wanting to go to the beach. She has ignored since then and we live together."}
{"id": "t3_4alii9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by flooding my classroom and forcing my entire class outside for 2 weeks.", "post": "Okay so to start things off this didn't happen today, more like 12 years ago. \n\nSo I went to a small country primary school in Ireland. We had maybe 200 students total, if even that and my class (6th class, highest grade in the school, we were all roughly 12) shared a room with 5th class. The school is just outside of a small town and on rare occasions the water would turn off completely. This has only happened maybe twice while I was at the school.\n\nOne day the water went, towards the end of the school day. We had PE outside at the end of the day and afterwards some of us stayed playing until we were getting picked up. I went in to get my stuff before going home and went to wash my hands. Turned the tap on but nothing came out. At this stage the school was basically empty and the teachers were gone home. I didn't notice that the plug was in the sink and didnt think to turn the tap off again as there was no water coming out.\n\nShoot forward to the following morning and the room is completely flooded. The room is about 90% carpet so that is completely soaked and starting to stink. Its early june at this point and while I know Irish weather gets a bad rep it was a nice summer. We had to spend the last 2 weeks of school outside (literally no there room in the school for us) and while we did do some actual work we mostly got to play. We had taken our exams for secondary school already so there was nothing to study for. \n\nI never told anyone it was me but I knew immediately that I had done it. I spose it worked out for me but I know it probably cost the school a good bit of money seeing as it was a small school. Principal also took the blame for it cause she used to check to make sure the taps were off to avoid this. Felt bad for her but it was pretty good for me.", "summary": "Flooded my school when I was 12, had to spend 2 weeks outside, teacher/principal took the blame for it and cost the school some money but I was never found out."}
{"id": "t3_3cm29c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23M] sister [20F] got engaged 4 months after I did, am I wrong for being upset?", "post": "My sister and her boyfriend have been dating for almost 4 years and lived together all through their 2 years of college (canada), and my fiancee and I have been together for 2 1/2 years. We got engaged 4 months ago after living together for 1 year. My sister brought it up to me that she wanted to know if I had any problems with her getting engaged since I just got engaged, at first I told her I was happy for her and then before it happened I told her I'm mad about it because I feel like they are going to take away our moment and showing off our engagement. When I told her I was mad she apologized and said there is nothing she can really do and that she doesn't want to or plan on taking away from their our engagement, but i'm still upset and feel like they only got engaged to one up us and because we got engaged.\n\nAm I in the wrong for being upset about it or is she being a terrible sister?", "summary": "My sister and her boyfriend[20M] got engaged 4 months after my fiancee[21F] and I did, and I'm not happy about it."}
{"id": "t3_f8x9a", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I tell my professors that I missed two weeks of class because I was going through opiate withdrawal?", "post": "From sometime in October until just before school started up again two weeks ago I was hooked on pain killers. I started with morphine and eventually got to a point where I was doing almost any opiate I could get my hands on, with the notable exception of heroin. \n\nI made the decision to stop after the holiday break because I saw how my world was falling apart: my grades dropped, I became a farcical character in my social circles (became \"that guy who's always high\"), and I had a couple close calls with the police.  These, among other reasons, prompted my family to tell me how worried they were about me, so I decided I could just go cold turkey and it would not affect my studies too much.\n\nWrong.  I have missed almost every class since two weeks ago, with little to no contact with any professors.  The few classes I did attend I went a sweaty, detached mess of a man.  My problem now is that I need to pass these classes, preferably with decent grades.  This is my last semester and I really want to be done.  \n\nSo, I come to you, Reddit, with the hope that some one out there can point me in the right direction, so I might get my shit together. I don't really know how to approach anyone about this in person, and I'm absolutely terrified of facing my peers and my instructors. Also, to the best of knowledge there is nobody, including parents, friends, etc., that knows the full extent of my problem.\n\nIdeas?", "summary": "I started started getting fucked up, I quit getting fucked up. Now I need advice on how to tell my professors so I can get my shit together.  Help?"}
{"id": "t3_25p3yq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "18f. Am I going insane? Are my relationship expectations too high?", "post": "I hope I am posting in the right subreddit for this. Lately I have been feeling....anomalous(?) regarding what I want out of a relationship. Another fling of mine was recently ended because he 21M did not want to \"marginalize his friendships.\" When I am in a relationship, I want a Tabula Rasa -- a complete clean slate. I don't want my significant other to be facebook friends or have any contact whatsoever with previous ex-girlfriends and/or people he has slept with. I provide the same respect. I am accepting of friends of the opposite sex as long as there is not a sexual or romantic past. It would make me uncomfortable if they were to hang out independently though, and I would prefer a group setting. \n\nIt's as if my ideals are from another planet. All of the men I have met seem to think my relationship expectations are absolutely ludicrous. I, on the other hand, do not think it is expecting too much of a person. I am feeling lonely and as if there is something wrong with me. Am I being overbearing? I would really appreciate some objective opinions.", "summary": "I don't want SO to have contact with ex's and all the men I have met find this to be controlling. Am I wrong for wanting what I want?"}
{"id": "t3_3kga4r", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "(M) Kinda new to having a female friend...", "post": "-Sorry if this isn't the right subreddit but I figured it was a good place to start-\n\nSo I just started my college career (woo) and one thing I'm not sure about is female friends. I had friends who were girls in high school, but all of my REALLY close friends were guys. I'm on a co-ed floor, and I'm getting pretty close to a girl who lives near me. I have a girlfriend (goes to a different school) and she knows that, so she knows that I'm not interested in more than a friendship (I would hope), but I'm really interested in being close friends. However I'm not really sure what I can/can't do with a close friend who happens to be a girl... Like if I went to get food with a close guy friend or took a bus from campus to a store to get something with a guy friend it wouldn't be weird, but are there some things you don't do with a friend who's a girl that you'd do with a friend who's a guy?\nThanks for the help, I don't wanna like lead her on or something that would ruin a friendship because I really would like to be friends with her.", "summary": "I just started college and am currently getting close with a girl who I only wanna be friends with (I have a gf), how do I not fuck it up by making it weird."}
{"id": "t3_1prvzc", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "So I have this friend...[M]", "post": "One of my best friends, lets call him Greg, has a routine. Once he meets someone he wants to be friends with he ditches all his current friends and becomes best friends with the new guy. \n\nAfter about a month, Greg comes back to his old friends with the new friend and integrates him in to our little group. Everything is great; everybody is friends. \n\nBut after a while, Greg stops being as close with new friend in order to make the new friend, say Allen, feel like he messed up and lost his chance to be friends with Greg. Allen is mad and acts like a dick to Greg and Greg does it back. After a while, Allen decides to stop being friends with Greg, but that would mean losing all his new friends who he met through Greg, who he likes better than Greg anyway.\n\nUnfortunately, all of Greg's friends are on Greg's side because he put them though the \"best friend\" routine too and they have turned in to his brown-nosing army. \n\nAllen can either apologize and keep his friends, but be caught in Greg's manipulative trap again, leading to the same outcome or stop being friends with all of them.\n\nWhat should Allen do?", "summary": "I have a friend who is a selfish manipulative sociopath and a pathological lair who turns his friends in to dick-sucking monkeys"}
{"id": "t3_2u4dlj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (27m) relationship questions!", "post": "Hi reddit. I have been doing a lot of self reflection lately, having just come out of a 1.5yr relationship 2 months ago. \n\nThere's something about myself I developed during this relationship that I don't like and I think it's unhealthy. It's hard to explain but I became very attached to this person, so much so that I would get very anxious when they were away from me. It made me uneasy when ever she was out or away. I kept thinking she would meet someone else. I felt as though she is wasn't really interested in me, and I would do things to make her jealous. \n\nI had really high self esteem going into the relationship, but it got lower and lower during my time with her. It felt as though she always kept me at an arms length, saying she has to maintain her independence. She kept secrets, and didn't really communicate to me. She would flirt with other guys. When I told her my feelings that I don't appreciate that, she said that she can do what ever she wants that she's a grown woman. \n\nIt's confusing me because with my ex-ex-gf, it was different. I loved when she would go away and I had time to myself. I missed her still, but it wasn't crippling and playing on my mind all the time. I could still relax and look forward to having her come home. \n\nCan anyone identify what is going on here? I don't want this to carry on into future relationships. Any more info needed or questions I'll be  sure to answer! Thanks", "summary": "I would enter a state of anxiety when apart from my ex. Very unhealthy. What can I do to not carry this over into future relationships."}
{"id": "t3_1skudx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] and my ex gf [18F] have just broken up and I need some reassurance", "post": "Will start with a little back story:\n\nI had been with my gf for a little over a year, and it has honestly been one of the happiest years of my life. My gf adored me and made me so happy. I moved away to university in September whilst my gf stayed at home and we've seen each other semi-regularly since I've been away.\n\nSince I moved away however it has felt different. Don't get me wrong, the amount I love and cared for her hasn't changed, but I have been beginning to feel that I am not ready for a serious relationship at my age. There are many things that I would like to do whilst I am still young that I couldn't do with a serious gf and I was beginning to not be able to be the bf I wanted to be for her because my heart wasn't 100% in it. It had gotten to the stage where I just knew I had to end it because I was, and have been for a while, staying with her to avoid upsetting her, as opposed to it being what I truly wanted which are not the right reasons to be in a relationship.\n\nI know that my gf is completely crushed. She straight away blocked me on social networks and now I am scared she will never talk to me again. I know I have really hurt her, but I want nothing more than to remain friends with her eventually, but the hurt I know I have caused kills me inside, even though I feel I have made the right decision because I wanted it to end on good terms (well terms that weren't fighting terribly etc.), I still feel like shit because of what I know I have done to her.\n\nI am just looking for some reassurance that my gf will be okay from people that have maybe been in similar situations themselves, because right now I feel like a terrible person and it's horrible.\n\nSorry if this message isn't the best written, but thank you for reading if you've gotten this far.", "summary": "Broke up with gf, I have crushed her, need reassurance that she'll eventually be okay because I feel like an awful person."}
{"id": "t3_18eekf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [22f] break up with my long distance boyfriend [26m] before or after Valentine's?", "post": "We've been dating for a little less than a year, on and off, and have been FWB for two.  Have broken up once before, got back together at Thanksgiving.  We don't have plans to see each other on V-day - he'll be working all day, and lives a 12 hour drive away, and I have to work this weekend.  I told him I would drive up next weekend, and he is planning our \"V-day\" already.  I am certain that I want to end the relationship; however, he does genuinely care about me/love me and I want to minimize the damage.  Would it be better to get it out of the way now, via Skype, or should I drive up next weekend and then tell him? I'm worried that it will be worse if I come up, he's planned a great V-day event, and I ruin his weekend.  Is it a dick move to end it via skype?  I know the timing is terrible, but I really don't want to hold out, miserably, for another month just because of a Hallmark holiday.", "summary": "Should I break up with my long distance boyfriend via Skype before I drive up for a planned V-day weekend, or in person after coming up?"}
{"id": "t3_o2vo1", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "So...the month of December was pretty much a giant middle finger to my progress so far. Time to pick up where I left off!", "post": "This is my first post here so I'll fill you in on my story so far:\n\n5'10\", male, 23 years old, currently 173 lbs (in the normal range, but I've still got more fat to lose to reach my goal).\n\nAt my heaviest I was 235 (in 2008) which I slowly brought down to 200 by July of 2011. From August to November I got more serious with my diet and exercise and got down to 165.\n\nThen came December:\n\nFinal exam season hit, and along with it came copious amounts of coffee, energy drinks, and general bad eating habits as well as lack of exercise. However, I was alright with relaxing my diet as I was stressed about exams enough already.\n\nThen exams finished and I went home for Christmas, where my mom had a fridge full of terribly delicious foods and snacks. Chocolates and candy were everywhere for guests (and me, apparently.) \n\nCombine that with seeing friends from home and drinking every other night, eating out most of those nights (and not making sensible choices, no less!), plus Christmas parties, Christmas dinner, New Years Eve party, etc. \n\nLong story short, 8 pounds gained. In one freakin month!\n\nThat's pretty much a whole month's progress. Gone. Not to mention the wasted month that I could have used to lose ANOTHER 8 pounds. I'm so frustrated with myself that I let it get that bad.\n\nBut I've now moved back to my place, where I have control over my grocery list, and I'm getting back on track. The chicken and vegetables are back on my list of staple foods, and its goodbye to all the sugary, processed, or deep-fried garbage that I inhaled last month. \n\nThanks for being here loseit! You guys are what make it possible to say no to my previously unhealthy lifestyle and strive for a better life :) Wish me luck!", "summary": "December was a perfect storm of events in my life that I used as excuses to eat/live like garbage. Now all temptations are gone and its time to lose it again!"}
{"id": "t3_30ooqy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU: By looking at my GPS.", "post": "So I was driving to Upstate NY to help my SO move some of her deceased grandmother's possessions home. I had just driven from CA to VA without an incident. I was 13 minutes from my destination. A police officer was passing me as I looked at my GPS, which is on my phone, which was resting on my knee. He pulls me over. Mind you I was going the exact speed limit in the right most lane. \n\nTurns out that in the state of NY, I dont live there and I have obonly been there like 2 times prior, that driving while holding an electronic device of any type is illegal. So he takes my license and does a check in his car. It takes forever for him to do the lookup. While he was doing the lookup another officer pulls in behind him.\n\nI have watched cops before. It is never a good sign when backup arrives. I am thinking that I have some hidden parking ticket or warrant. Great I think,  as I soil my pants just a little. The officer comes back up to my window. He hands me my license and apologizes that he is force to give me a ticket. He is nice enough to give me the DA's number and lets me use his pen, so long as I dont stab him in the neck with it. I asked if it would get me out of the ticket, had I stabbed him in the neck. He said no. \n\nI thanked the officer and asked if I were allowed to drive while holding printed instructions. He informed me thst in NY, at least, I could be drinking coffee, smoking a cigarette, eating breakfast, and read the Sunday paper. I just needed to keep one hand on the wheel. I thanked him and went on my way.", "summary": "Ticket for driving perfectly, but was holding a GPS. Learned I can drive and perform open heart surgery, so long as I dont hold an electronic device, but keep a hand on the wheel."}
{"id": "t3_wdd3n", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "why do people not acknowledge other people when passing by?", "post": "I was going to the store today, and i just happened to pass by woman who was a little above average in looks, and height, nothing really special about her. I have a habit of making eye contact and smiling to most people I cross paths with just because its nice, and theres no harm in smiling. Anyway, as soon as we made eye contact she immediately her head down, and looked away, but as soon as we passed she put her head back up again and continued as if nothing happened. This has happened to me a lot before, but for some reason today it really struck and bothered me. So Reddit, what is your take on why people do this?", "summary": "tried to be nice and polite by smiling to a stranger, she immediately averted her gaze. why do people do this?"}
{"id": "t3_2lbel1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [17 F] of 4 months told me [19 M] her education is more of a priority than our relationship.", "post": "The day before she said this, she was at my house and I was complaining about how she never does anything when we're alone together, she always waits for me to do something. She doesn't touch me ever and she doesn't ever make a move. I need my physical stimuli haha! \n\nAnyways, that day I just felt so alone. She would literally stare into blank space instead of looking at me. She wouldn't acknowledge me stroking her leg or anything. All she wanted to do was play mariokart it seemed like. When I started complaining, she said that sometimes she feels like she doesn't know me and that she feels like we have way different takes on how a relationship should be. \n\nShe had to go home and we didn't finish the conversation, but I told her we need to talk about this face to face and not over messaging and she said okay. The problem with that is, she never has any time to talk face to face because she is in color guard at her school, but I was willing to wait until she did have time.\n\nThe next day, I tried talking to her over messaging, not about anything just a \"Hey, How was your day?\" and she blew me off. She said she had too much homework so she couldn't talk to me. I said, \"Okay, sorry, but real quick, can I pick you up from school tomorrow?\" and she said, \"I have things I need to do tomorrow, sorry\".\n\nI said, \"What about our relationship though? We really need to talk.\" and that's where she said, \"grades go out Friday, my education and eligibility for color guard are more of a priority right now\".\n\nI haven't talked to her since then. Should I give her some space? What should I do?", "summary": "We had a disagreement, and I wanted to talk about it, but she said \"my education and eligibility for color guard are more of a priority right now\". Any suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_2brgjw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 F] with my boyfriend [21 M] one year, I am paying for a vacation that turned out to be more expensive than I thought.", "post": "I have been with my fantastic boyfriend for one year. He is amazing, I am pretty sure I love him even though I have not told him yet. Months ago I bought tickets for my friend and I to go to portland in August because they were so cheap. Turns out my friend can't get the time off and the tickets are non-refundable so I ask my boyfriend if he would wanna go and I say I'll pay for his plane ticket. He says he \"would love to go with me\". Well my boyfriend doesn't have a job right now so I feel bad making him pay for half the hotel room, I tell him I will pay for the hotel room all three nights without thinking. Now things are going to cost me at least $850. I just keep thinking he has not told me he loves me either, for some reason I just can't stop thinking about the fact he probably would not spend $850 on me. I feel like a fool for spending so much on him. I am worried I am going to start resenting him over this. I don't even know how to approach the situation or what I want my end game to be.", "summary": "About to spend $850 on my broke boyfriend to go on a vacation with me. Can't stop thinking about how he probably wouldn't spend this much on me if he did have the money."}
{"id": "t3_2lg4fb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [18M] going to a party where an old middle school crush [17F] is also going.", "post": "Story time! Back in the summer after 8th grade, I hung out with my group of friends everyday for the whole summer. There was this girl in the group and I really liked her. Like I had the biggest and dumbest crush on her. I was only 13 so I didn't know shit, but I was thinking she's perfect for me, I gotta marry her and all this dumb stuff. The puppy love was so strong I wanted to be a part of her life and I wanted her to be a part of my life. I never had the courage to ask her out, and we went to different high schools. Eventually we stopped talking but during high school I never really liked anyone else. Every other girl felt dull compared to her. I still get nostalgic thinking about her and what would've been different if I had the balls to ask her out. Anyway I'm going to a party this Friday and I heard she's coming. I honestly don't know what to do to so this goes great and eventually ends up in a relationship.", "summary": "really liked girl from middle school but too much of a coward to ask her out. Gonna meet her at a party and need advice on how to not screw up and get this to end in an relationship"}
{"id": "t3_1800td", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Apparently I want to sleep with my two best girl friends who I can never touch.", "post": "Sorry, title sounded a little awkward but I guess it makes sense. So basically the other night the girl I've been sleeping with (call her F) regularly comes over and stays over, we have sex and then pass out before we have class the next day.\n\nI have a really hard time sleeping, especially staying asleep, and so a lot of times I'll wake up, but F is a really sound sleeper and it never really bothers her. I remember waking up at least twice, and both times F was snuggled next to me, her head on my chest, but when I looked at her, it wasn't her. \n\nI'm in a fraternity and so we have sweethearts who are some of our best friends, but one of the things is that we absolutely CANNOT sleep with them or have sexual or romantic intimacy, since that would put the relationship between the girl and the entire chapter at risk. BUT, both times I woke up, I saw a different girl. Two of our sweethearts (call them S and B) both have a lot of physical similarities to F, all short brunettes who are cute, and so somewhere along the line of waking up I saw first B, then S, instead of F when I woke up. \n\nI loved it. I like F a lot, but we're just keeping things casual so we're not in a serious relationship or anything, but I spend so much time around S and B as friends, with no romantic or sexual stuff between us (except one time with S before she was a sweetheart). But, I can't act on the feelings I have towards either one, which is that some days I feel as though I might be in love with one or two of my best friends, and that maybe the girl that would be perfect for me is standing right there, and I can't do anything about it.\n\nI just wanted to tell someone this, because obviously if I tell any of my brothers/other sweethearts shit might hit the fan and people would look at me differently.", "summary": "instead of seeing the girl I was sleeping with when I woke up, I saw my two best girl friends, and now I'm worried there might be a deeper feeling than just friendship, at least on my part."}
{"id": "t3_2yccml", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28F] want to do something nice for my boyfriend [26M].", "post": "I've been a real pill this semester, cause my stress levels have been through the roof with schoolwork. My boyfriend has been nothing but amazing: giving me time to study when I need it, helping me figure something out when I'm in tears, and just being super supportive. He recently went to PAX East and got a book signed for me (I didn't ask him to and didn't know he was doing this) because I was really sad that I couldn't go. I really want to do something nice for him, but I'm having a hard time thinking of ideas...my head is too full of school things ;-;\n\nAbout him: physics phd student, loves biking and running, (and forces himself to swim), enjoys reading (favorite book is The Name of the Wind), watching neflix, and casual gamer.\n\nI don't have a whole heck of a lot of money, since I'm in school full time, but I do work too, so I can spend a bit on this. Maybe like ~$100? Spring break is in a week, and we live about an hour north of Boston!\n\nGive me your fun ideas!!", "summary": "I've been a stressed-out crazy girlfriend this semester, and I want to do something nice for my boyfriend, but need help thinking of ideas!"}
{"id": "t3_2lfj9r", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My [24M] girlfriend [20F] has depression and refuses to get a job.", "post": "So I am stuck and dont know what to do. Im not asking for a solution im just asking for your opinion.\n\nI have been seeing this girl for about 6 months now and it started out well. She was unemployed and actively seeking employment and living a healthy lifestyle with regular exercise. She is a nice girl and my freinds like her and get along with her well.\n\nShe had a previous relationship that ended badly and she got abused by her partner. She is on heavy medication to treat her depression and sometimes will cry for hours for absolutly no reason. I do my best to comfort her but it is hard for me to understand how it feels as i have never really felt bad depression.\n\nI have been helping her look for work but now she doesn't even try. She has done self harm in the past and has bad scarring up her left arm. She has also stopped exercising and gained weight but she is still the kind person she was when i first met her.\n\nI have talked to her about work and exersise and she gets upset when i mention her weight and just says she is still looking when i ask about work. She texts me at least 40 - 50 times everyday when im at work because she is bored. She says things like \"promise you wont leave me\" and \"i dont know what i would do without you\" things like that a lot.\n\nI have tried talking to her parents aswell but they baby her too much and wont push her to do anything which i think may be the cause of the problem.\n\nIf she is away from me for more than 2 days she gets upset and depressed. It is starting to affect my personal and work life but i am honestly scared she will harm herself or go off her meds if i break up with her. To be honest i dont want to break up beacause i like her a lot. I only want to help her but how can i do this if she wont help herself?", "summary": "my girlfreind has depression and wont get a job or exersise and has a past with self harm. I like her and dont want to leave her but she is starting to drag me down with her."}
{"id": "t3_2xd7hg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22m] decided to break up with my girlfriend[22f] and I don't know if it's a good moment", "post": "I wrote a post yesterday explaining that I want to break up my 4 years relationship.\n\nI said that I don't feel the same, because she hates my friends and she is living miles away from me because she doesn't have money to stay in the city to continue her degree.\n\nToday she has failed an exam and she is coming next monday to see it.\n\nIs it a good moment to speak about my feelings?\n\nI'm not sure if it's the right moment but I don't know when I'm going to be face to face with her again. It could be months.\n\nI need advice.", "summary": "Is it a good moment to break up with my girlfriend if she failed an exam today? I could not see her during months."}
{"id": "t3_1q5scv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm stuck with what happened tonight. I don't know what to think. (This is all over the place, I'm sorry.)", "post": "I'm 32/F he's 29/M, together 1 year friends for 2 before that off and on. My guy we'll call Luke and I went to our first pregnancy appointment today. I'm about 6 weeks. We've had a crazy day with his car not working right, supposed to be fixed but the hood flew up and crashed into the windshield while on the highway. Took it to his mechanic and we got another car to get home in. \n\nOn our way to my place there's this stray cat in the road and it darts back across the street in front of the car. Luke doesn't even brake or swerve to miss it. We've talked about moving in together but he doesn't want my cats to come along. He's never had indoor pets or much of pets while growing up. Cats have been my companions all my life. My first pregnancy 9 years ago I went it alone and because of where I was living I had to give up my cats then to have the baby, alone. I gave them up. It wasn't feasible then. So here we go again. He wants me to give them up because he doesn't want inside pets. My Harley has food allergies and is racking up lots of debt for me with health problems and expensive cat foods. Mallory can be obnoxious sometimes. \n\nHe lives with his parents has for 7 years now. I have my own apartment and bills and such. He's never had to be responsible or adult until now. He won't have a civilized conversation about keeping the baby or not. Is this really a good choice, what's the right answer? He says we can do it but the cats have to go. Even then he still wants to maintain two apartments. I get SSI Disability and am looking for work. He has a stable job. We need each other to do this right. But his lack of empathy tonight with the stray cat leaves me feeling scared of him. \n\nAny advice? This is my first time having a partner to have a baby with but I feel like I'm doing all the sacrificing.", "summary": "Bf and I are expecting and he wants me to get rid of my cats. Tonight he tried to hit a cat with his car."}
{"id": "t3_1ulbeq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When did NC start working for you?", "post": "first love [24m] and I [20f] broke up 9 months ago but only decided to initiate strict NC 3 weeks ago. I still think about him and miss him constantly and I know he's been seeing another girl so that makes it about 100 times worse. I lost a lot of my social circle due to the breakup so I'm alone a lot while he's with good friends all the time. I just feel crappy a lot and constantly have this lingering pain and him in the back of my mind and I'm scared it'll never go away. Can someone share some personal stories of hardship so I feel less alone? Will NC eventually do what it's supposed to at some point. I don't feel much different now than I did when we initiated it.", "summary": "Need some reassurance that NC will do what everyone says it does because I'm afraid this lingering pain and lonliness I have will never leave."}
{"id": "t3_2ymzxe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[26m] want to break up with my girlfriend[36f] of 20 months, but still love her and feel extremely guilty", "post": "I love my girlfriend dearly, but she has kids and I have no children of my own.  I don't feel like I'm right for fatherhood, I'm a very irritable person.  I feel she wants to get married and settle down, and because of her age it's fairly important to her.  I'm not ready for this, or to be strongly tied to anything.  The only thing stopping me is the guilt, I love her and fear I might crush her... and make her jaded, emtionally insecure for future relationships.  Am I being weak? Am I being to considerate?  Will she be OK ?  I appreciate any advice, thanks redditors", "summary": "still love girlfriend but want to break up as I want a different life path than her.  I havent been able to end it as I fear I'd crush her, please help thanks"}
{"id": "t3_2jrjn0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (21F) with my boyfriend (22M) of four years, in love but I have an intense fantasy of having sex with a woman.", "post": "at the start of my four year relationship, I thought I was completely straight, realised I was also attracted to females, but never had any desire to experiment. as I became more sexually experienced I realised I wanted to have sex with a girl. it's something that has been on my mind for about 2 years and I can't seem to get over the fantasy. \n\nmy boyfriend knows about this, though probably not aware of how strong my desire is. I don't think I could go my whole life without doing it, I mean i could, but I would definitely feel like I am missing out on something. it's started to affect how satisfied I am with my relationships sex life (we still have sex frequently, and I enjoy it, but I find my mind wandering to how it would feel if it were a girl). \n\nmy boyfriend has actually said he would be okay with me doing it, and thinks it would be hot. he's even suggested a threesome (not sure I could do that) or him just watching me with another girl. I'm more inclined to the latter option, but if the girl was willing to include him in it as well, I might consider it, although the idea is a bit nerve wracking for me.\n\nso my question is, is it possible to explore your sexuality outside the relationship without damaging it, and if so, how would I even go about finding someone that would agree to sleep with me (us), no strings attached, possibly have my boyfriend watch or join in?", "summary": "in a relationship with my boyfriend for four years but fantasising about sex with women, want to make this happen in real life but not sure if I should/how to proceed. "}
{"id": "t3_2uqagt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do I [20 M] tell my SO [20 F] that she has gained weight?", "post": "Let me preface this by stating that I have nothing at all against fat people. It's a body shape like any other and should be respected as such.\n\nThat being said, both my girlfriend and I would prefer to stay in shape. About a year ago we agreed that if one of us were to even start putting on weight, the other would let them know. Well, over the past few months she has been getting a little heavier. Nothing crazy or off-putting by any means (I'm attracted to her regardless) but I can't help but think about when we made that promise. \n\nWe're very close and communicate well but she can get rather emotional sometimes so hurting her is the last thing I want to do. She mentioned to me that her mom had just recently commented on her weight and she (my SO) seemed pretty offended. \n\nFor background and to preemptively answer some comments that may pop up: We don't live very close to each other and have relatively busy schedules so asking her to join me at the gym would be difficult. She's active through other activities but her diet isn't great.\n\nShould I say something? If I did, how would I bring it up?", "summary": "Girlfriend put on some pounds. I don't mind but we agreed (some time ago) to let each other know if this were to happen. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_1munm0", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I am just so confused", "post": "So last month at a party for my grandma's birthday, my grandma says there is this girl that she wants me to meet.  I'm apprehensive because my grandma is famous for setting my brother up on a date with a one armed girl. No offense to the one armed ladies out there, it just took my brother by surprise.  I also haven't dated much (read: at all), but I finally got a handle on some major depression and anxiety that has ruined my life for the past 10 years, so I agree to meet her.\n\nSo we go on a few dates, and awesomely enough she is not only cute as hell but fun to talk to and hang out with.  I have an awesome time, and as far as I can tell she has a great time too.  Couple of days after we last get together she asks if we can put off getting together again while she hunts for a job.  I say of course, because that seems pretty understandable to me.  \n\nI text her a few times, asking how the hunt was going, or seeing if she had time to get dinner blah blah.  Didn't ever hear anything back.  5 weeks go by, don't hear anything.  O well, she is either still on the job hunt, or just not interested I suppose.  Then this morning I get back from the gym to see she accepted a facebook friend request I sent her a long time ago.  According to my notifications, she accepted the request, liked some status I made yesterday, then unfriended me.\n\nSo I write this to repeat that clich\u00e9 of I don't understand women.  Also, I'm letting facebook news bother me, so that's pretty cool too!", "summary": "I'm a 25 year old with the problems of a 16 year old and want to complain like a 10 year old."}
{"id": "t3_la3tj", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Reddit, where the hell should I get married? Help!", "post": "* My fiance and I live 300 miles apart; he lives in St. Louis, and I live in Alabama. \n\n* In seven months, I'll be moving to live with him permanently.\n\n* Our tentative date for the wedding is May 2013. \n\n* We have no idea where to have the wedding. \n\nI'd been leaning towards having it in St. Louis, since by the time of the wedding, I'll have been living there for a year. Also, the city has more of a \"party\" atmosphere in general. Many people in the South (parts of my family included) can be a little uptight when it comes to alcohol. I want the wedding to be a drunken celebration, and I want to attract a fun crowd.\n\nMy mom really wants me to have it here in Alabama, because she thinks most of my family won't be able to afford to go if we have it in St. Louis. She says it's customary to have the wedding where the bride's family lives. \n\nAnother argument she has is that my family is much larger than my fiance's, so I have more people to accommodate. She tells me to have the wedding where I want, but I know she'll guilt me forever if I don't have it here.\n\nI wouldn't mind having it in Alabama, but I think it would make planning harder. I would love to have my family/friends to be able to come, but I also want *his* family/friends to come too.\n\nMy fiance is little help and doesn't have a strong opinion either way. His parents aren't picky where the wedding is either.\n\nI've asked others for their opinions, but I was hoping that maybe Reddit can provide some magical answer that I haven't thought of yet. Or maybe some insight I haven't yet considered.", "summary": "My mom wants my wedding to be here in Alabama, but I kind of want it to be in St. Louis. Can you please help us?"}
{"id": "t3_1z6lkw", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Hey r/jobs, I need some advice on an upcoming promotion!", "post": "First off let me say that I love my job.  I get to do what I love, in a killer place, but I don't really make a lot of money considering the field I'm in.  I work in a non-profit museum institution doing video production, and AV technical support as a secondary element to the job.  My salary is barely ok for an entry level position in my field (~30K), even though the work I've been doing up until this point is quite beyond entry level imo, but that's neither here nor there.  \n\nMy predicament is that my boss is taking a job elsewhere, his title is manager of AV, and they want me to take his job, but keep the creative responsibilities I have now.  While I agree I do want to keep making creative videos, I'm weary that they're going to try and dump his work load (relatively little in comparison) on top of mine with a minimal raise.  There is very much a rank non-profit culture here, very top heavy, and upward mobility is notoriously difficult (just as a caveat to anyone who might understand the particulars).  \n\nAnd so my question is, how do I figure out in a cordial and non-confrontational way how much is fair for them to offer me for the promotion with additional responsibilities?  I realize I could just ask my current boss how much he's making but that doesn't seem proper or legit, plus he's been here for 20 years so they can always pull the seniority card.  Any advice would be appreciated, thanks in advance!", "summary": "I'm in the mix for a promotion (taking my current boss' job who's leaving the company), don't know how to negotiate the upcoming salary offer.  "}
{"id": "t3_1wptri", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[16/m] I can't decide whether or not I should break up with my partner [16/f]", "post": "I've been debating on the topic on if I should end my relationship. I'm not sure if what I feel for (let's call her Kelly) Kelly is genuine love, yet I have a strong feeling that it really is. Perhaps it's just because I'm going through high school and this is just the result of raging developing testosterone, but I digress. The kicker is that Kelly is near-depressed and mainly relies on me for emotional and moral support because of her abusive family and she can be self-abusive if she reaches a certain point of sadness (Note: when we broke up before it was because of her abusive father getting mad at her and out of emotion she broke up with me since I didn't come to offend her. In retrospect, she felt guilty about it and decided to re-start our relationship. She said she became a shut-in and didn't eat for two days, looking back that seemed somewhat ridiculous.) I feel like she also expects too much of a person like me with no type of job and her unneeded materialistic ideals are malicious to both my psyche and my bank account (I have no job). More and more, we are having arguments and fights starting for no apparent reason; just earlier today she got angry at me since I decided to hang out with my friends instead of her (but I was going to see her in a few days anyways). I also feel like that she'll become terminally depressed since she tends to be over-dramatic about things and do dangerous things to herself... I care for her, but her security, well-being, and health may be in danger if I end our relationship. Please respond, Reddit.", "summary": "I don't know if i want to break up with my girlfriend but I worry for her future and her well-being if I do decide to cut it off, yet I've been feeling more miserable with her lately."}
{"id": "t3_kchpx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "lol at `smart`women....", "post": "So i was browsing plenty of fish . com today just for the lulz and maybe some scene hoe jack off material.... when i came across a lot of girls profiles....\nalmost all were `education : some uni/college `and then id look on occupation and see shit like cashier, hostess LMAO why the fuck would you go to uni and then have a shit job like taht..... first of all if i was even interested in you i wouldnt even date a chick who is too dumb to finish college or uni.... fuck sake ill work my ass off and you make minimum wage selling shoes and fries%\n? fuck that shit", "summary": "bitches out on dating site are fucking losers in my eyes and i wouldnt date them at all... would you fellow redditors?"}
{"id": "t3_2t0y4a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [15 M] was broken up with by my Girlfriend [15 F] after only dating for a month, friends act like I should feel bad", "post": "I dated this girl for only a month, and she broke up with me because she decided she might be a lesbian. We've only been broken up with for a little over a week now, and I've accepted it since it wasn't for that long and we broke up on good terms\n\nHowever, everyone acts like I should be completely heartbroken. She was my first girlfriend and I did really like her, but I'm nowhere near as bothered by it as people think I should be. I keep hearing people say I need to take time out to find myself and that I'm rushing things by wanting to find someone else now.\n\n Is it really wrong for me to move on so soon, or am I just doing things at my own pace?", "summary": "First girlfriend breaks up with me because she's a lesbian, friends think I'm moving on to quickly, I disagree and want to know what reddit thinks."}
{"id": "t3_1lyor2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[25M] with my EX GF [18F] 2 years, We broke up because I flirted with another girl", "post": "# Part 1\nI'm finding it hard to understand something. My ex GF broke up with me 6 months ago, I tried winning her back for 6 months. We would see each other once every 2 weeks and we'd get on like 2 peas in a pod and she kept leading me on, however 2 days after seeing her she would tell me it was a mistake and that we can't speak anymore. This of course was really unfair and caused me great depression. \n\n# Part 2\nAfter dealing with this for 6 months I decided to completely cut her out, and I've been doing good by not messaging her anymore. She still messages me almost every 2nd night. I don't get it.. She doesn't want anything to do with me however she still messages me. Surely if someone wanted to cut someone out of their life they wouldn't go through all the trouble of constantly messaging someone? \n\n# Part 3\nI guess what I'm trying to get at is, does anyone have an explanation as to why someone who broke up with me keeps messaging me even after I said goodbye for good? \n\nThanks", "summary": "Brokeup with ex 6 months ago because of something I did, fought for her for those 6 monthts. Finally let go as she wanted and she still messages me. Why?"}
{"id": "t3_3n2ygy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31F] with my fiance [48M] of 2 years, finding it more and more difficult to work together at our job.", "post": "We met at our job, with him being a supervisor and I, an entry level worker. I have worked there for seven years while he has been there for four years. We fell in love quickly and have went strongly together ever since. \n\nHowever, a few months ago I was promoted to supervisor, too. I was happy because it meant more money for us to accomplish our goals. I thought he was happy as well. Only now he takes to arguing with me at work and shaming me when I make a mistake or take too long to complete a task. I kindly let him know that I feel he isn't addressing me respectfully and he says nothing in response. \n\nA few of those blow up times have been in front of other coworkers, which I find embarrassing and unprofessional. The next day, of course, it's like it never happened. \n\nIt makes me feel like a complete failure and my heart breaks every single time because this is the person I love more than anyone else in this world. I don't want our work arguments to affect our relationship together but he literally gets so mad at me he stops talking to me altogether. \n\nHe has been married twice. I'm a late bloomer. This is the first (and I'm hoping the last) long-term relationship I've ever had. So I'm having trouble understanding how someone who loves you can speak so harshly and get mad so quickly for the tiniest things.", "summary": "Fiance/coworker makes me feel horrible at our job and I'm afraid not finding a solution to the issue will hurt us both inside and outside of work. "}
{"id": "t3_1eiydb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it too early for me [27m] to buy a plane ticket for my SO [25F] for a major vacation?", "post": "So I just met this girl about two months ago and everything has been going great.  We see eachother everyday, common interests everywhere, amazing sex, etc.  Problem is that in about a week, my work is sending me to Japan for 5 months.  I really like this girl, but its obviously unfair for me to expect a long distance relationship this early in the game.  We've both said that we aren't going to be looking for anyone else while I'm gone, but that we can't really apply any labels once I leave.\n\nThat being said, my work is not only paying for all of my airfare, but they are also giving me a pretty hefty bonus for going there (about $20,000 plus incidentals and living expenses).  She has toyed with the idea of getting a ticket and coming to visit me, but I know the cost is a big concern (its about $1200-1400 from where we live).\n\nWould it be weird for me to offer to go in on it with her or pay for half or something?  I feel like I'd really like her to come and I know she does too, but I don't want her to feel like I'm pushing too hard this early.", "summary": "I'm very into this girl I've known for 2 months.  My work is sending me to Japan and paying me extra for it.  Should I offer to help pay for the cost of her airfare so she can visit?"}
{"id": "t3_25ouet", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20M] have been on two dates with her [20F], she seems very shy and insecure. Should I run?", "post": "I met this girl through a friend, and we've been on two (double) dates with two of our very close mutual friends (my best guy friend & female friend are dating, this is my best female friend's friend.) Each time in person she's very quiet and distant with me, and really doesn't talk a whole lot.\n\nI understand some people are naturally shy, and that's okay, but she consistently texts me [very pessimistic things about herself] I'm wondering if I should let it play out, or take the red flags and run. She's otherwise a really nice girl, so I'm a little stuck on what to do.", "summary": "Been on a couple of dates with shy, insecure girl. Do I let it play out, or accept red flags and run?"}
{"id": "t3_tkrcp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So Reddit, what is the most awkward way you've handled someone asking you out?", "post": "So reddit, how have you awkwardly handled being asked out? I think I set the bar pretty high from my awkward and anti-social self:\n\nI was sitting and eating lunch in the cafeteria of my school when a girl I had a huge crush on asked me out. I was super suspicious since I'm known as a smart but nerdy person. I said, \"I don't know.\" and she responded pretty much by saying,\"Okay, you can think about it and tell me later\" with a surprised look. I was nervous, because I had recently told my friends I liked her, and if I said yes, and it was a prank, then my reputation would be screwed. I ended up saying, \"I don't know\" for around 3 days when she stopped asking me if I had made up my mind. I still think it was a dare because when I asked, she said it was for \"personal reasons\". If it was actually genuine, then  I hate myself.", "summary": "girl of my dreams asked me out, I said \"I don't know\" for three days. She says she wants to date me because of \"personal reasons\". I thought she was being dared."}
{"id": "t3_1rz6sn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19/f) live in a different state as my family with my (20/m) husband. Having major issues with my in-laws and Christmas.", "post": "Sorry guys, this is going to be all over the place. I'm on my phone and I'm not very good at writing stories. \n\nI married my high school sweetheart 3 months ago (yay!) And moved out of state to follow him in his travels with the navy. I didn't care to leave because I knew we would always go home for the holidays, and if he couldn't, I would just go home by myself.  I'm very close to my family and would be miserable without visiting! Unfortunately my husband isn't so close with his parents because they're crazy racist. He's white and I'm hispanic. So racist to the point that they won't even allow me in their home. They say the nastiest things about me and the hispanic community to my husband and his younger siblings. My husband always defends me or just walks away. We got married at the courthouse and both of our families were invited to come witness it. All my family showed up and not one person from his even did so much as to call. My family absolutely adores my husband, they're very loving and open. And they of course want us to come stay with them for Christmas. He loves my family, but his parent's want him to stay at their home for Christmas.... Without me. I can't even described how much it hurts that he's actually considering it. Though I understand that he wants to see his younger siblings. I don't want him to go. I want him to come home to my family with me. My home is somewhere  we're both loved and accepted. His family makes me feel like scum and disgusting. Which is crazy because his family is trailor poor/white trash and I come from a very well off and civilized family. \nI feel like it might be selfish and bitchy of me to ask him not to stay there. I know that its his family, but they're so unreasonable. Am I wrong for being hurt and wanting him to come home with me?\nAlso, other than this we have an awesome marriage. This is basically our only issue. And we've been dealing with it for years.", "summary": "My husband's family is super racist and hates me and want him to spend Christmas away from me and that make me feel sad."}
{"id": "t3_yedtm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How does a college student move states?", "post": "To begin, and give context, it seems now two years after graduating high school that I am just sick of where I live. (No this isn't a *wah me* post.) So, I have always had the attitude, that if I don't like something in my life, I want to change it. \n\nI don't like being around people I grew up with. I am subscribed to my city's subreddit, and it seems that people only talk about where they would rather be, due to extreme heat and lack thereof things to do.\n\nHowever, now I am asking you redditors for help and to see how you guys have moved on your own.\n\nBeyond actually *deciding* which city I would want to move to, (I have narrowed down my decisions,) I need help on how to finance the move because right now, it seems completely unrealistic for meand it pains me. I feel somewhat trapped here. Now I have the transportation to move, and I could quite possibly put down one months payment on my lease. However, only being a college student, I don't have the experience to be considered for a job that one could just accept via the telephone. I would need an entry level job. It seems I would need a job previously to moving, because I can't spend weeks without pay scrambling to find a job.\n\nI find myself in a catch 22.\n\nI need success stories. Have any of you redditors out there moved all by yourself without the help of affulent parents or have handy tips for me to make my dream a reality?", "summary": "A college student who really feels like he needs/wants to move, however, is unable to make this step financially."}
{"id": "t3_1ti21o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (28f), my husband (29m) and his family Christmas Party.", "post": "My husband and I have been married for three years.\n\nWe moved back to his home town shortly after getting married. One of the downsides to moving to his home town is that we are insanely far from my family, but our job prospects were better there, so we went. He has a very large family of Uncles, Aunts, and cousins galore. All very nice people, no real issues there.\n\nThe problem is that they have a yearly Christmas party and I have very bad anxiety issues. The past three years I've sucked it up and gone any ways, ending our visit with very bad panic attacks and my poor husband has had to cart me away back home (not that he complained).\n\nWe tried to compromise last year a little bit with going for two hours, but I really felt like I was ruining the party for my husband, who really only sees his family this one time a year, regardless of how close we are.\n\nThis year, I said that I'll just stay home and he can go as long as he wants. He's reluctantly agreed but is worried about what to say to his family about my absence. He doesn't like to lie, so he doesn't want to say that I'm home sick, but he also doesn't want to have to explain my anxiety, because thus far his family hasn't put that together yet and they would likely (this is just a guess) say that I should be going any ways to get over it. He doesn't want to argue with them the entire night about the benefits of treatments for anxiety disorders.\n\nSo my question is, what should my husband tell them when they ask where I am?", "summary": "Anxiety keeps me from the party. Husband doesn't want to lie, but feels the absolute truth would just cause a non-stop discussion about my anxiety (not fun!). What should he tell his family about me not being there?"}
{"id": "t3_1z7qx6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] and a newly met girl online [22F] What do i do now?", "post": "So I recently posted on CL looking to meet with someone new in my area for nothing too serious but something that could develop in the future and I got messaged by a girl who was interested. We Exchanged numbers but have been talking online more. \n\nOur plan was to get to know eachother and then maybe meet up and go on a date but in the few days we have been in contact she hasn't been engaging me in any convos. I text her and she doesnt respond but does when she is online through skype. I don't know if its a change of heart without telling me or something else but I really want to talk to her more but not come off like im pushing too hard or acting like a stalker.\n\nShe initially gave me her number and sent me a photo of what she looks like without me even asking so it doesnt seem like she isn't interested, and when I do initiate a convo she replies to me, but every time I bring up the idea of talking in person or arranging to meet up she seems to either not reply or ignore answering the question, and I cant work out why seeing as our main intention was to meet up!\n\nSo what do I do now to get her to talk to me and/or want to meet up without seeming like im being forward?", "summary": "Met girl online, both interested in meeting up but she makes no effort to talk to me and disregards when i ask to meet up."}
{"id": "t3_2fe06d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my GF [18 F] since 3 month, in a long distance relationship, she's depressed", "post": "Hi, first of all, sorry for my english ...\n\nso i'm dating this girl that i really, really love, but we are living in different countries and can only see each other on vacations and like 1-2 week ends each month, wich is hard but wont last more than a year since i plan on moving in nearer.\n\nBut there was this last week end when i came to her house for the first time (She usually went to mine) and met her family, everything went smooth and all but now she is super sad because she misses me a lot apparently, and she got intrusive thoughts like she'd preffered i didn't came that week end.\n\n I don't think i'm losing her but i want her to be happy again. And all my listenings and advice don't seem to help a lot, even if it used to solve everything until now... \nWhat else can i do to show her ?", "summary": "What can i do to make my \"depressed\" (she didn't go to the doctor so nothing official) happy ?"}
{"id": "t3_td5c0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How soon is too soon to meet a SO's parents?", "post": "I've been dating this guy for just over a month, but we've spent pretty much every second of our free time together. As in 6 sleepovers a week, and Friday night - Monday morning without a second apart. So it feels a lot more serious than your average one-month relationship. \n\nHe invited me to spend Mother's Day weekend with them. They live a few hours away. I would not be going home for the holiday anyway, so that is not a factor.\n\nMy questions:\n\n1. Is it too early to spend a whole weekend at his parents' home, regardless of the holiday?\n\n2. Is it too early to spend what I consider to be an important family holiday with his family?\n\nMy instincts are telling me that I should just wait at least another month, but I don't want my declination to put a damper on the relationship or hurt his feelings.", "summary": "Dating guy for a month and he wants me to spend Mother's Day weekend at his parents' but I'm afraid it's too early for that."}
{"id": "t3_1jzj82", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Could use some advice...", "post": "Fair warning, this is my first post to Reddit, and I'm on mobile. Please bare with me.\n\nA week ago, I decided to start a (hopefully) lifelong journey to slowly yet steadily improve my life. I bought a scale, and weighed myself at 340lbs. I wasn't nearly as upset as I probably should've been, considering I was expecting closer to 400lbs.\n\nThat very day, I took the first step. I made a myfitnesspal account, and tracked a typical day for me, with no changes. I was very, very quickly disgusted. I discovered two things that fascinated me. The first being, that I DONT over eat. I do however, drink incredible amounts of calories. I found I was drinking TWO THOUSAND calories on a good day. Well, clearly I've established what I need to change most, right? Right.\n\nThe next day, and every day since, I've completely stopped drinking soda, and went into what I believe was a sugar/caffeine withdrawal. Years of drinking hundreds upon hundreds of calories worth of soda has left me more than a little messed up. I allow myself 1 glass of coke a week, and so far this has kept off any cravings, yay! \n\nNow for the advice I need. As I said, I've been tracking my progress with myfitnesspal, hoping to lose 100lbs within a year. Myfitnesspal puts me at approximately 2500cal/day at a loss of 2lbs/week. And I'm actually having trouble meeting this. Just wondering if I should be concerned if I'm not even coming close to the calories that are suggested I eat in a day. Note, I do NOT feel hungry.", "summary": "Having difficulties meeting my calorie goals, and sometimes end up 100s below an already low goal (for someone my size), should I be concerned?"}
{"id": "t3_4xomti", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (23F) with my boyfriend (26M) - how do I get over something that wasn't his fault but is still causing anxiety and insecurity?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for about 6 months, and now, things are wonderful. However, while I logically acknowledge his, it's hard for me to feel it emotionally. \n\nEarly on in our relationship (March-mid June), he underwent a lot of life stress that caused him to become a completely different person - he was distant, doubting the relationship for no good reason, regularly 1-3 hours late to meet me, etc. We talked about breaking up (amicably) but we didn't. During this time, I tried my best to be understanding and I basically put aside my needs (e.g. affection or wanting to hang out more) so that he could have space to deal with his stress. As a result of everything, I became a little depressed and also incredibly, frequently anxious about everything.\n\nNow, he is back to being wonderful, affectionate, supportive, and considerate again. However, because I've been habituated to negative norms for those 3 months, I have a hard time re-setting and accepting the new norm. Even though things have been good for 2 months now, I'm still  cripplingly anxious. I still don't give him the benefit of the doubt. I still worry that we are on the edge of breaking up. \n\nWe've talked a lot about this and we don't know what to do. I know that his feelings and actions in his stressful period are no longer relevant or applicable. He's debunked some of my worries, like my fear that he doesn't think our relationship is good. He's working to address my needs. I know I need to get over the past, but I don't know how. My pent-up emotions are now bubbling over and I'm more irritable, negative, and accusative, but I don't want to be. It's not that I can't forgive him, since he didn't do anything wrong, but I don't know how to change my fearful, anxious mindset and cognitive distortions of the present. \n\nDoes anyone have any thoughts, advice, or similar stories? Thanks!", "summary": "Boyfriend went through a super stressful time that put a strain on our relationship. Now things are wonderful but I can't get over some of the mental damage it caused."}
{"id": "t3_2y4mc7", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [17/M] have a crush on a girl [16/F], we're good friends and I wanna get a relationship going, how/where to start?", "post": "Hello everyone, this is my first time asking the internet for advice on something but I really want this to work out for me.\n\nSo basically; this girl and I have known each other for about 4-5 years and we're pretty good friends and we get along pretty well, I'm good at making her laugh and she's great to talk to.\n\nWhen it comes to relationships, I've never even been in a semi-serious one before, although I'm after a stable, happy relationship that revolves around actual love and caring for each other, rather than the increasingly more typical \"whoo, relationship means sex!\" kind of relationship, what I'm trying to say here is I want this to count.\n\nI don't really want to go into too much fine detail here, but I'm after advice on how to get the ball rolling, whether digitally or in person. (I know in person makes them feel more special, but if I can't muster the courage, nobody's gonna be feeling special but me after I blow my chance.)\n\nWould it be better to ask her on a date? Just tell her how I feel about her and see her response, then move forward or withdraw depending on the response? Or the typical \"Will you go out with me?\" kinda thing.\n\nNow let's say we get this going, then what? We're both currently attending school, I don't have a job, so I have little to no income, so movies and dates can't really be a common thing, maybe occasional... maybe...\n\nI'd just like to reiterate that I lack confidence with relationships to the point I am actually slightly depressed (Not attention seeking, just elaborating on the case, haha).", "summary": "How to get a relationship going with an unsuspecting (I assume she doesn't know) crush, if something does start, where to from there, as students?"}
{"id": "t3_habsi", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Is he just not that into me? 26f", "post": "(repost from /r/okcupid because I'm dumb)\n\nOk, I feel like such a high schooler having to ask this, but I was hoping reddit could help me out here. I'm newly single and I feel like I'm completely lost trying to get back into the game.\n\nSo, I met a guy on okc. Things seem to be going really well. His picture wasn't that exciting, but we had a lot in common so I gave him a shot. He's funny, nerdy, loves all my favorite stand-up comedians, loves Firefly, blah blah blah. On paper, the perfect man. In person? He's also freaking GORGEOUS. And still funny and nerdy. He's the first guy I've met on okc who I felt genuinely excited about, rather than just cautiously optimistic.\n\nSo here's the rub: we've been on four fantastic dates, but he hasn't made a move. Not even a peck on the cheek. I'm starting to wonder if he's not attracted to me. He seems like the type of guy who's been a nerd his whole life, and doesn't realize he's hot, so his confidence might not be there. I'm tempted to make the first move, but I also suspect he's just old-fashioned, and that would completely turn him off. What do I do? How many dates do you all usually go on before it feels right to make a move? How do the men of reddit feel about the woman initiating?", "summary": "I've been on four dates with a man who I want to hump into a stupor. I would do awful, unspeakable things to him. He has not even kissed me yet."}
{"id": "t3_21oly0", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Potential employer asks for a photo of me. This is illegal though. How do I refuse his request politely?", "post": "Some information, I was applying to a job and they requested I send in a cover letter, resume, and recent photograph. However this is not a modelling or entertainment company. It's a marketing intern position. \n\nI just sent my letter and resume and felt that if they were really interested, they will contact me. \n\nThey did contact me, but not for an interview but for a photo.\n\nI checked labour laws and it states unless its a modelling or entertainment position, they cannot ask for a photo.\n\nHow do I politely decline sending a photo. I want the job still but I don't want to come off as rude. I was thinking of writing \"how about I come in for an interview instead?\" But would that be rude for me to impose that on him? And if he says something like \"we need a photo before extending an interview\" can I just outright tell him that question is inappropriate by labour law standards or should I say \"not applicable\" ?", "summary": "I want the job but don't want to send in a photo. How to tell him \"no\" with potential to still get job"}
{"id": "t3_5193zh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19F] my father [61M] sometimes seems to not care about me, and it really hurts.", "post": "Im not even going to bother post all the abuse he's done to me, posted that in other places. But\n\n-first visit to the gynecologist, (was 19 then too, thought there was something wrong, wasn't. Lol yeah right, like I'll have sex before 25) and the doctor prodded and was super rough and I came out crying and my dad told both my mom and I \"forget it! It doesn't matter\", \"drop it now!\", etc.\n\n-I had a boyfriend for a year. My father never bothered to meet him. Didn't seem to get too mad at all when I told my parents my boyfriend abused me.  \n\n-I have heard nasty things my father said about me when he thought I wasn't listening.\n\nI am in college but there's no way I can move out.", "summary": "I don't think my dad cares about me and it hurts. I have no other male family to turn to, as my dad moved us thousands of miles away from my only family (other than parents)."}
{"id": "t3_4auqcg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 F] with my BF [26 M] 5 years, I'm no longer sexually attracted to him", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together 5 years, we met in college and had one year together since then we've been long distance going from seeing each other every month for a weekend to now we have 7hrs between us and we see each other every 4-6 months. I will be graduating (Masters degree) in June and we had planned for me to move down to where he lives.\n\nI truly love my boyfriend but our relationship has become stagnant, he's been depressed for a while and started taking meds for it (relevant in a bit), he seems to think that everything will be great when we're living together but the last two times I saw him (Christmas and Thanksgiving) had me reconsidering my relationship. He got absurdly drunk at two events we attended and it was mortifying, he stated it's because he's stressed, depressed and knew we would be parting soon, again. \n\nBluntly, I am not attracted to my boyfriend sexually right now. Sex with him was a chore the last two times we saw each other (if I'm completely honest it's always not been the best), he couldn't finish because of his meds. Usually he can't finish inside me for whatever reason and instead jacks off which does nothing to make me feel desirable in this relationship. \n\nI love him but I question how well I know him, he is very closed-off and whenever I have pointed out concerns/issues he says it'll be better when we live together...\n\nHow do I fix this? I don't know what to do. My entire adult life so far has been tied up in this guy. I love him deeply but I feel dread at the thought of a lifetime of our current relationship/sex life. I tried to keep this concise, if you have any questions I can answer them in the comments.", "summary": "I love my boyfriend deeply, we are long distance, barely see each other, our relationship is stagnant and I find myself no longer attracted to him. How do I fix this?"}
{"id": "t3_zmft1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, at what point, if any, do you believe artificial life should be considered \"alive\" and unlawful to destroy?", "post": "I was reading the artificial heaven question on this subreddit, and it got me thinking...too much. I've been watching a lot of scifi TV shows lately, and keep debating with myself about the point at which artificial life should be given the same rights humans have.\n\nI thought about it for a while, and concluded humans are similar to robots. From what I know, we have signals going through our bodies and neurons interacting to give us everything that makes us human (consciousness, self-awareness, etc). So I figure any type of artificial intelligence that reaches this level should be given the same rights, right?\n\nBut at the same time, wouldn't artificial intelligence just be a computer's imitation of consciousness, self-awareness, etc? And is that all we are too, except our brains imitation?", "summary": "At what point should Data or Marvin be considered \"alive\" instead of just a computer imitation of humans? And if none, isn't that all we are, a neurological system's imitation of those same traits?"}
{"id": "t3_3cej6m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "26f woken up by fire alarm & 28m passed out drunk on couch", "post": "I (26f) have not been getting enough sleep lately, so knowing I had some free time last night, I decided to take 3 melatonin & get some actual good, deep REM sleep to reboost. My boyfriend (28m) was drinking beer and playing video games with a friend as usual. Did not think too much of it. Fast forward 6 hours later, and I wake up to the fire alarm blaring. I run to the kitchen to see a giant pan of ramen burning on the stove. The kitchen was filled with smoke so I turned off the stove and rushed to get the windows and doors open. \n\nHe almost set the fucking house on fire. It took me a *long* time to wake up from the alarm because it made its way into the setting of my dream. I took 3 melatonin. I normally don't wake up for anything. I am so shaken up right now. We have a dog and two cats. I know it could've been worse, but how do I get him to see the seriousness in this?! His drinking has gotten out of hand and I'm worried he's going to brush it off as not a \"big deal\".", "summary": "Bf almost set house on fire in middle of night, how do I get him to see his drinking is out of hand (he's in denial)?"}
{"id": "t3_1fhooz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need help recovering after the affair. (23/f)(31/m)", "post": "My boyfriend had an affair. We've been together nearly 2 years. It's been several months since the affair ended and we are working on it. He's given 110% to proving himself and getting help for substance abuse issues as well. Things are better between us now than they've been in awhile. \n\nSometimes I have a really hard time coping with it. I guess I wanted to see if anyone had any advice they could offer? \n\nIt's like this awful rollercoaster sometimes. I can't believe he did such a hurtful and selfish thing to me, and to the other woman. She and I have talked at length, and while it's been helpful at answering questions, it's also just something else to be sad about. \n\nI know he regrets what he did. He's taken full responsibility for it, he hasn't shied away from anything I need to ask, and he's gone the extra mile to show me he wants to earn my trust back. \n\nHonestly sometimes I just feel so broken. And I don't want to keep throwing it in his face because he's well aware he fucked up and it's something we can either move past or stay stuck at. \n\nI want to move past it. I am obviously hurt and angry with him, but also with myself. I feel like by staying with him, I am making what he did okay. Or that I'm not respecting myself. On the other hand, I know people fuck up, and I've never been one to give up on people. \n\nIs this just going to take time? Am I being an idiot?", "summary": "Boyfriend had an affair. His actions show he's trying to fix things, but I still feel hurt months later. Anything that can help?"}
{"id": "t3_1n0asc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How involved are you in the nonprofit sector or Not-for-Gain Organizations in your country? (btw - it's my cake day!)", "post": "I can't believe it's been a year already. I've seen some moderate growth on /r/nonprofit over the past year. So please, come by, say hi, and give us your feedback!    \n    \n    \nAlso in the last year, we got to see this TED talk make some waves: [Dan Pallotta: The way we think about charity is dead wrong](\n\nWhile some of what Pallotta said is still under scrutiny, a great idea is propagating: if we invest in the infrastructure of a nonprofit, it can grow immensely. If we give nonprofits and NGOs  the means to do their own research, their work will be more effective at *solving* problems, and not just providing \"Band-Aid\" solutions. \n\nHowever, we must demand transparency -- there are a few scams out there, as uncovered by \"[America's 50 Worst Charities] Basically, things like the \"Kids Wish Network\" making money by pretending to be the \"Make-a-Wish Foundation.\"\n\nWhile Bill Gates made the odd choice to invest even more money into better condoms, he also signed \"[The Giving Pledge] this year -- a cohort of high net worth individuals pledging to give away half their wealth in their lifetimes. (Certain members, naturally, are also under scrutiny, but it's still a big deal). \n\n**Finally, and most importantly, there's the Reddit community's involvement** in the \"[third sector] By raising awareness of articles like [this] you are helping to reshape the culture. The biggest asset you have, Redditors, is your input. Your ideas. There are many energetic young people who would be very valuable at any one of thousands of charitable organizations across the globe. I don't believe you have any duty or obligation to get involved. I'm not here to preach.  But I do believe your input is invaluable.", "summary": "What do you think about not-for-profit organizations and the work they do? Are you involved, or have you thought about getting involved?"}
{"id": "t3_3makqz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] want to tell my girlfriend [24 F] about my mother's medical condition", "post": "I have been dating my girlfriend for eight months now, initially casually and seriously since two months. She is American and we both live in the US, but I'm originally from Spain and my family still resides there. We are both going on vacation to Italy next week and have an eight hour layover in my home town. Although we haven't decided what to do during this time, it is quite likely that she will meet my parents.\n\nMy mother is disabled due to a severe stroke she had a few years ago and can no longer speak, walk, nor take care of herself. She stays at home with my father and has a nurse take care of her while my father works. I have not yet mentioned this to my girlfriend, partly because I have not found a good time to bring it up and partially because I am very reserved about sharing this information with other people. I believe I have also not completely made peace with the situation and have only ever confided it to my best friend and my now ex-girlfriend.\n\nMy girlfriend's family also has various medical issues, which she has always been very open about. Although I know that my situation is nothing to be ashamed of and that I have every right to avoid telling her until I feel comfortable, I can't help but feel a bit lousy about not telling her earlier. I just hope that she doesn't feel that I did not trust her enough to tell her without the pressure of her meeting my parents and that this has a negative effect on our relationship. The truth is that I absolutely trust her with this and that she is one of the most important people in my life, it's just that whenever I tried to tell her I got cold feet.\n\nI guess all that I am looking for with this post is some reassurance that she will probably completely understand why I have withheld telling her and that I didn't do anything wrong or questionable.", "summary": "Girlfriend will be meeting my mother next week. Withheld telling my girlfriend that my mother is disabled until now. Looking for some reassurance that I have not done anything wrong or questionable."}
{"id": "t3_53a9fq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [18F] jealous of my friend [17F] and it's taken a toll on my self-esteem and the friendship", "post": "I'm on mobile and new to Reddit so if anyone could show me how to add flair/direct me to a more appropriate subreddit that would be very appreciated. \n\nI've always had low self-esteem. I'm 5 feet tall and slightly chubby, but still within what is considered a \"healthy\" weight. I've suffered from acne for most of my life and while it's calmed down a bit now, I still have scars and occasional breakouts. I even posted to r/amiugly and... the results were less than satisfying. I also have anxiety and some minor depression which makes everything 10x worse. However, I'm blessed enough to have a loving and understanding  boyfriend who prefers my body type and makes me feel beautiful.\n\nMy friend is tall, thin, and pretty. She's always been loved by just about everyone she meets, while I've always been shy and quiet and generally forgotten about (seriously, if you asked anyone in my high school, no one knew who I was and everyone knew her). She's perfect model material, so much that she was scouted (during a shift at McDonald's, no less! I hate how the uniform makes me look, but she's model material even at work). Ever since she got scouted, I've felt worse about myself. I always knew I wasn't as pretty as her, but now it was confirmed. I'm the ugly friend. \n\nI've since been... avoiding her. I feel horrible about it, but I can't bear to look at her. The fact that she had this opportunity handed to her on a silver platter because she won the genetic lottery makes me incredibly angry and jealous and sad. The fact that I'll never be beautiful and recognized as such makes me feel worse. The fact that I'm being so petty over this... you get the picture. I don't know what to do about any of it. I can't bring myself to talk to her about it. I'd love any sort of advice.", "summary": "my friend is a model and I'm jealous. It's brought down my self-esteem and made me want to avoid her."}
{"id": "t3_2637gy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] with my Girlfriend [17 F] having problems trusting again after being cheated on by ex", "post": "Not using a throwaway because who gives a fuck\n\nA while ago my (ex)gf of around 7 months cheated on me.\n\n Now, I understand that I need to get over it, and I pretty much have, my problem is trusting my now girlfriend, lets just call her S, because she goes to a different school around 30 min away from me, and lives that far away too. She has a \"party\" background, while I on the other hand don't.\n\nHowever, she says the partying days are pretty much done, but I suspect that is because she goes to an online school, but that will change at the beginning of next year when she'll go back to a real high school because it looks better to graduate from.\n\nLike today she, without telling me, went to a \"pool party\" as she put it, that consisted of her, 2 of her friends (both girls, and 4 guys. That made me extremely unsettled. Am I over reacting, or am I justified in being unsettled by this? I feel weak and insecure when I keep telling myself that I shouldn't be. Any advice on how to get over this?", "summary": "I have severe issues trusting people, especially in relationships, after my last girlfriend (now ex) cheated on me after around 7 months. I need advice."}
{"id": "t3_kzmdm", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Advice On Approach", "post": "I'm 22/M and she is 20.  We both go to the same university.\n\nFirst let me preface this by saying that I haven't dated in about 4 years.  My last relationship was during my junior/senior year in high school and it lasted almost 2 years before it ended badly.  Just thought you guys should know so you have some background info.\n\nNow for where I need advice.  I haven't quite met this girl yet, but I saw her at my roommate's ex-girlfriend's apartment.  My roommate and I live just a few doors down from them.  Based on what I can gather from friends that went to high school with her and a quick glance at her facebook page, she seems like she would be a pretty good match for me.\n\nSo I guess the question that I am posing is how should I go about getting to know this girl?  Should I just outright ask my neighbors about her and if they would be willing to set me up on a date or invite her to a group get together type thing.?\n\nIf the latter option happens (group get together), any advice on how to know if I should ask on her on a date will be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Girl I want to pursue is a friend of my roommate's ex.  Not sure how to approach getting to know her."}
{"id": "t3_4tdw1u", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Help I [23/M] made the worst mistake of my life. GF [23/F](serious)", "post": "I fucked up. I have been with my gf for 4 years and I was happy. I just threw all of that away 2 nights ago. I was drinking with some coworkers and it was this one coworker. I instantly regretted it and the morning of I told my gf my mistake. She cried and just ran out. I myself hate cheating too. I have a biological father who did that to my mother and I fucking did the same thing. She's on the other coast right now we were suppose to go together but I fucked up the previous night. We were planning on moving in together in September but I fucked it up. We haven't talked since she left. She said were on a break right now and we'll talk when she comes back in a week. I hate myself so much that I think the only way to make this right is if I just end myself so I can never hurt her again. I tried twice. My biggest fear right now is even if she takes me back it won't be remotely similar to what we had before. I don't think she'll be happy like that. I honestly don't know what will happen and I don't know if I can live with the results.", "summary": "I cheated on my longtime girlfriend who I saw my future with. I'm scared and hate myself. I love her."}
{"id": "t3_1ym7dr", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm (18m) having trouble asking out my best friend (18f)", "post": "I feel that this is going to be a long post. To start we're both in our senior year of high school and have known each other since sophomore year. When we first met I really didn't notice her that much and didn't talk to her until another friend introduced us to each other. After that we really hit it off well and I just thought we could be really cool friends.\nFast forward to next year and we have the same class again so we hang out constantly and try to partner up because we're both awkward around other people. (Side note we both are also on the swim team at our school so we naturally hang out a lot) People immediately notice and assume we're going out but we both fervently deny it as we're just friends. I was considering asking her out at this point, but was crushed when I found out she had just started going out with another guy before I could even ask. They break up at the end of the year because he was an asshole to her. \n\nFast forward to this school year and I finally get her number so we're chatting pretty regularly and not relying on school to talk anymore. I'm finally getting my confidence up to ask her to homecoming just as friends so she wouldn't feel awkward when she tells me her friend introduced her to a football player from another school. They never date but he decides to take her to homecoming so I never even go just saying I hung out with friends that night. Except that my best friends date never showed up, and that she was forced to tag along with a friends group. At this point I'm getting frustrated and want to protect her from more bad relationships but I don't want to ask her out and ruin our friendship should it not work out. I only recently asked her to prom as friend after mustering my confidence and want to be able to try to ask her out then. I've never been in a relationship before because I hate the awkwardness that it causes but I really like her. Is there anyway I could tell her how I feel without ruining our friendship?", "summary": "Trying to ask out best friend but don't want to ruin our friendship should it not work out. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1nglgt", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[24/M]I am having anxiety over the girl I'm seeing (24/F) because she's afraid to take the next step.", "post": "Hello people, I am in need of some relationship advice.  To preface this I have to start by saying I've been cheated on in the past by 2 different girls one of which I was just shy of getting married to before she came clean...so I'm not the most trusting person in the world anymore.\nI have been seeing this girl for about 3 months now and when I first met her roughly 4.5 months ago she still had a boyfriend. I am aware that this looks like a rebound thing but he was a long distance bf and we've taken things very slow because I wanted to ensure that I was not a rebound. Things have been going smoothly with us and we get along very well. Over the summer she got another job and is moving to a new place (which is closer to her work and to me coincidentally) so she has not had as much free time to spend with me the last few weeks. Here is my problem, she is afraid of commitment especially since she just got out of a 2 year long distance relationship and she does not want to commit to becoming official. Another reason is that she has very little free time lately because of the new job and getting her house ready for the move. I have a growing fear that she doesn't want to commit because she wants to \"shop around\" I have this anxiety even though we have had the exclusive talk.  \n\nSo how do I bridge this gap of where we are in the relationship?", "summary": "She won't commit, I am having anxiety over the possibility she is \"shopping around\" even though I really don't think that's the case."}
{"id": "t3_2txodh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by Being Nice", "post": "So I met this guy at the beginning of the school year, thinking that he was a pretty cool dude to hang out with. I was nice to him, cause he was nice to me.\n\nFast-forward to a few months later. I'm sitting in class, next to him, and I see flecks of white stuff coming out of his mouth. Like those little wet white boogers that you sometimes get. I was concerned about this, not for his sake, but for mine, as I didn't want any of that crap getting on me or my stuff. I decided to keep a close eye on him from then on.\n\nI wonder now whether or not if knowledge is better than ignorance, cause I go through a living OCD hell of one huge dilemma; getting the fuck away from that disgusting boy.\n\nHe rotates his jaw while his mouth is closed, and then professionally blows out a ball of condensed phlegm, just like how those Amazon tribes blowdart animals for food. He spits out his inner mucus around his radius of 5 feet, splatting everything with that fucking disgusting fluid of his. He spits on the inside of his shirt, on his hands, on his pants, on his comb, on his backpack, on other people; basically everything.\n\nI could perhaps tolerate his presence if he didn't spit on his dirty fat paws, and start using them to touch other things. Worse, he's a very touchy feeling kinda person, so he tries to touch other people and me. I try to avoid him like the plague, but he has some kind of a homing sensor and he pops out everywhere I go.\n\nI don't know what to do. I fucked up by being nice to him, and he's trying to get close to me; literally and physically. Redditors, what should I do?", "summary": "Was nice to a kid, turns out he's the grossest motherfucker I've ever known and he's trying to become close to me (in more ways than one). FML"}
{"id": "t3_106z5g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21] made a mistake and lost some trust from my gf [20]. What will our relationship look like now? When will the relationship begin to be fun again?", "post": "I really could use some insight. \n\nIf you look in my history, my girlfriend was disillusioned to my friendship with my ex. I since cut off contact with my ex, have had many long talks with my girlfriend. \n\nMy girlfriend is still upset. Very upset. I have taken her on a few dates and we still spend time together, but she isn't really enjoying herself. She wants me to \"wow\" her with well-planned dates and extra time and effort.\n\nThat's fine with me! If that's my penance, I am not afraid to do it. However, since the event (a week ago) she hasn't contributed anything to the relationship. She's happy on dates and upset when I don't plan anything.", "summary": "I want to keep trying and win her over.  Does anyone have any ideas on how long I should keep planning dates, how long I shouldn't expect her to contribute, or anything else to keep in mind?"}
{"id": "t3_4i1v8n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17/F] don't know if it's appropriate to give my number to a guy [18/M] who went on a couple dates with my friend's [17/F] older sister [19/F].", "post": "About a year ago, this guy asked my friend's sister to prom. He was interested in her, and she basically had no interest in him. She said yes, but only as friends. Even after this he clearly still had feelings for her. She didn't really have any interest in dating him, but she thought maybe she'd try going on a couple dates with him. She wasn't sure if she genuinely wasn't interested or she was just scared because she hadn't really had any relationship experience before. \n\nI know this guy because we have a class together and we sit together. He's somewhat shy, but sweet and funny. We've spent some time together, we co-led a group of kids at a volunteer event, and obviously I'm around him every day. I definitely have at least some feelings for him, and I can't really tell if he reciprocates, he's just generally a very quiet person.\n\nHim and my friend's sister went on a few dates, and as it turned out it was somewhat awkward and very very platonic. Neither of them attempted to make any move on the other, and things were generally very tense. Like, sitting down and having a pro-cons conversation about kissing eachother and then not kissing eachother tense. She plans on breaking whatever this is off with him the next time she sees him, but she doesn't even know if this will be necessary because they haven't even hung out in a month. Any interest that either of them had is dead.\n\nAs I said earlier, I kind of like this guy. Graduation is soon and we'll soon be going our separate ways, though we'll still be in the same area. Should I just give him my number, whether it turns out to be platonic or not? Or should I just steer clear?", "summary": "Have a bit of a crush on a guy who I see every day and won't be seeing soon, he went on a couple platonic dates with friend's sister, should I even bother giving him my number?"}
{"id": "t3_236r9x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my boyfriend [26F] of 3 months, how do I get over my insecurities around all of the interests/activities he and his ex share?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been \"official\" for three months, dating for five months. He is still friends with his most recent and \"big\" ex. I have hung out with her at a couple of parties and we even had dinner together just the two of us a couple weeks ago to get to know each other better. She has been really nice to me and told me she is happy that he found me, wants us to be friends, etc, etc. Both of them have assured me that there are no residual feelings and I have no reason to doubt them- that isn't the issue here. \n\nThe issue is that I feel insecure with all of the history/interest that they share that he and I don't share. For example, they dated for 2 years, traveled internationally together, have the same friend group, have a lot of the same interests like mountain biking, going to music festivals (e.g. Bonnaroo), and they are even working together on some local events (e.g. planning a TEDx). \n\nHe and I get a long really well, communicate well, and have even done a 6 day trip to the Mexican jungle together, but I can't help but feel intimidated by all the aspects that they share that he and I don't. It makes me feel kind of like the odd man out? For instance this summer they will probably go (with other people) on mountain biking trips- something I am just not into. I hesitate to bring this up to him, because there isn't really anything he can \"do\" about it. \n\nSo, how do I stop feeling insecure about this and start feeling better?", "summary": "Boyfriend and his ex share a lot- friends, interests, event planning and I feel insecure about it. How do I get over it?"}
{"id": "t3_219b7k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "32/m with 31/f for 6 months - She is secretly checking her ex's facebook every night, texting/crying once a week.", "post": "I'm wondering how to handle this situation and if my GF is really ready for a relationship based on some of the things I have seen. She spends a lot of nights over at my place, and I noticed that whenever I went to take a shower before bed, after I came back she would be on my laptop and quickly close down some open tabs. I didn't think much of it the first few times, figuring maybe she was looking at something embarrassing, but then I noticed it turned into an every night thing whenever we spent a few days together.\n\nI checked my browser history, and she is looking at her ex's facebook. Specifically, her ex, and her ex's new girlfriend. I know that she had a rough breakup very shortly before we started dating. She was married to him for 6 years and said that he was very controlling and not a good match for her, and when she wanted to leave he put her through a huge guilt trip and made it difficult. I've noticed that about once a week she will exchange a few texts with him and be off in the bathroom crying about it. \n\nThat said, she has told me how happy she is with me and doesn't know why she is still sad about a bad relationship ending. I figured some of it was just curiousity over what her ex was doing and who he was with, but coupled with the crying about it makes me wonder if she is just not over him.\n\nI don't know what to do about the situation because when she does the weekly crying routine, she is emotionally wrecked for the whole night and it sucks. I've tried to be understanding and give her space, but it's not getting better. The Facebook thing also affects her. During the day/evening she will be flirty and talking about all the stuff we're going to do in bed, and then after I get out of the shower and she's been on his Facebook, it's like she's emotionally unavailable the rest of the night.\n\nI really love her though so I want to try and make it work, it's just I'm not sure of the right way to handle this situation.", "summary": "GF is looking at her ex's facebook all the time and texting/crying once a week with him. How should I handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_50iiei", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (25,m) confused about my relationship with my ex (23,f), who I dated 7 years ago.", "post": "This girl (we'll call her Claire) was my first gf ever back in hs. We dated for about a year but distance drew us apart. Our breakup was a little messy and for a few years we didn't talk. Fast forward and we began texting again 'as friends'. We both moved back to our hometown after college and I expected us to have a great friendship, as that's what we both wanted. In my eyes a friendship would consist of hanging out, doing things together, etc.\n\nEver since she moved home she refuses to hang out with me one on one, as she believes it's 'too close to bf/gf'. As much as I would try to get closer with her she would equally push me away. However, her and I text all day every day, she tells me all of her closest secrets and innermost thoughts, we talk on the phone about her problems etc.\n\nI'm really confused about all of this. She treats me 'like a boyfriend' via text/phone but she treats me as LESS THAN a friend in person. I finally decided to bring my frustrations up to her and mention that 'it's our last year possibly ever in the same state (before grad school) and that I wished things went differently etc. She took this as me confessing my love and told me 'too bad but I don't feel the same way.' Basically a generic 'friend-zone' response that she has sent to multiple guys before.\n\nI really don't know what to do anymore but it's wearing on me. I have tried to bring things up to talk about what relationship we have and she completely blows me off month after month. And yet I'm still there anytime she needs to talk about issues or even other bf issues (which i told her to not bring up to me multiple times) On one hand I feel like I need to do what's best for me. Which includes slowly cutting her out of my life. On the other hand we've been 'friends' for so long now that I'd feel awful 'abandoning her'. I feel like I love this girl and it sucks. Idk what to do anymore.", "summary": "dated girl for a year, she came back into my life as a friend. Refuses to treat me like an actual friend. Maybe it's because I'm in love with her? Please help"}
{"id": "t3_3paky3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by bumming a guy two smokes", "post": "This was about an hour ago, here's some context\nI'm at a Mini Makers Fair which is a family oriented event that showcases technology, kids programs and other things associated with \"makers\".. basically creative tech fair for yuppie families.\nWhatever.\nI was helping display my friends interactive musical sculpture.\n\nMy point is I was at a nice family event and not just hanging out on the streets of downtown or somewhere more likely to get swindled.\n\nI was taking a cigarette break and piddling around on my phone.\nA guy cursing, looking into his empty pack spots me and asks if he can \"buy a couple smokes off me\"\nOn average the going rate for an American Spirit is $0.35, $0.50 if someone is feeling generous.\n\nI, out of habit, act put off whenever someone tries to bum smokes off me. This is to give them a chance to rescind their offer without me saying \"No\" outright. \nIt's something I started doing with my friends who are chronic bums so they realize I'm not an endless free cigarette machine.\n\nBut, the guy offered to buy right? He had his wallet out, right? \nI busted out two smokes for him which he takes with a thanks me briefly.\nI'm still kinda absorbed partially in my phone but notice he pauses and then starts to walk away.\n\"I'll be right back with something for you\" he says.\n\nI guess I figured he might work at one of the booths that have some cool, silly swag for me? But I remembered thinking it was weird he took his wallet out and then didn't give me any money.\nMaybe he didn't have any single dollar bills?\nI waited around for quite awhile after.\n\nJust lame because I'm generally pretty generous but it's situations like this that make that generosity go into hiding for awhile.", "summary": "guy offered to buy smokes off me and then just took off without giving me anything instead. I blame myself for being ignorant of peoples petty greed."}
{"id": "t3_1j2hrb", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[WA] Landlord failed to transfer power service after promising to do so", "post": "I recently switched to a different apartment complex that is owned by my rental company. When I went into the leasing office to sign my new lease I asked if I had to do anything special to change my power utilities account to my new apartment. They said that all I had to do was fill out a form that they had with them, and they would transfer the service for me.\n\nWell, they didn't transfer the service, they only added an account, and I got charged for 2 months of power for an apartment that was leased to someone else. I called my utilities company and they told me to take it up with my rental company and that they couldn't do anything about it. I am going to see my rental company tomorrow, and want them to reimburse me for the two months of electricity.\n\nThey have been sort of rigid in the past, does anyone know of any recourse I have against them telling me no?", "summary": "Rental company said they would transfer power service, but only added a new account. I have 2 months of utilities charges for which I should not be responsible. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3ipf37", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "What is this \"power play\" thing?", "post": "So I took a gal out for dinner at a casino. She ordered two appetizers (didn't share), a bunch of drinks, then steak and lobster, which came with a salad. Over the evening she didn't really let me talk, but she mostly complained. She ignored me 28 times to txt on her phone. Our food came and she sent back the lobster and had it replaced with shrimp. So she ate the shrimp, did not eat the steak, nor the accompanying veggies. She gave me an attitude that after we ate when I didn't give her money to gamble. She was really into her video slot so I said I had a good night, and told her I was leaving (politely). She gave me a half hug, did not look up from the machine to make eye contact nor did she thank me. Some other odd things she did: told me to tip more (15% wasn't enough) then complained about the service, how her legs got sweaty because it was too hot, smoked and blew towards me when she knew I am asthmatic, then ordered more complimentary bread at the end of the meal and ate it.\n\nSo I walked out of there thinking ok, we didn't click, she wasn't interested in me, I definately wasn't interested in her, as I found her behavior repugnant. No big deal, no big loss. (well actually HER loss) So a friend asked how it went and I said eh, not going to happen. Told him what happened and he said, \"oh she pulled a power play on ya.\" I didn't think much of it at the time, but is that a new dating thing? Kinda like playing hard to get? But instead you act all domineering or self absorbed to get attention?", "summary": "I thought I went out with a (female dog), because she treated me like crap. Now I'm wondering if how she behaved was her actually doing some new dating thing called a power play."}
{"id": "t3_2yq3zu", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Seeking advice for non-traditional co-ed shower", "post": "My fianc\u00e9 and I don't like the notion that the wedding is all about the bride \u2014 he's getting married too! So, for instance, we will both be escorted down the aisle. \n\nMy mom and some friends are hosting a wedding shower for us. I am adamant that it is not a *bridal* shower \u2014 it's for both of us. In keeping with our non-traditional-ness, **we would like to invite people who are important to us, no matter their genitalia**. \n\nMy mom thinks we should invite all our friends' significant others, since it's a co-ed shower. But some of these people we haven't met or have only met a few times. They certainly wouldn't make the list of \"people most important to us.\" \n\nThings get a little complicated if we don't invite the SOs, because my mom wants to put \"co-ed shower\" on the invitation (so she doesn't get inundated with calls like this: \"Wait, did you mean to address this to Amy AND John?\"), but **I don't want people with long-term SOs to feel shafted because the SO wasn't invited**. We don't exactly want it to be a \"couples shower\" \u2014 just a gathering of people close to us. \n\nAny advice? Maybe an alternate name we could give the event so people still understand it's a shower and that it's okay to come if you're a man? We don't want the guest list to get so big that it's basically another wedding. (Plus, space is an issue; it'll be held at my parents' house.)", "summary": "We want to have a co-ed shower, but we don't necessarily want to invite all our friends' SOs. "}
{"id": "t3_1brdkk", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "How would I(m18) salvage friendship with girlfriend(17f) after breaking up with her after 1-1/2 year relationship?", "post": "I've(18m) never had much luck with girls but I've been shaping up my life together and would like to be a little more adventurous when it comes to the relationship world. I broke up with her(17f) after a 1-1/2 year relationship and told her that this was why, ensuring her that it wasn't her. Obviously she was still upset, and now she's giving me a choice of either actually going my separate way and possibly losing her completely, or being with her. I don't want to be in a committed relationship right now, but I also love her still; neither of these options will work. I'm trying to make my own option, where we remain friends and possibly, after college, think about becoming more serious. Is this possible? And if so, how can I do it?", "summary": "How can I(18m) salvage friendship for possible future relationship with ex(17f) after breakup of 1-1/2 year relationship"}
{"id": "t3_3688w0", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [26/f] in US and my best friend [32/m] is not. We discovered we have deeper feelings...he went home, now wants to step back. how do you deal with it?", "post": "Someone I consider to be a best friend and I actually \"met\" here through reddit. Some time later, we decided to meet despite a great distance between the areas we live in. After spending time together in person, we discovered deeper feelings we have for each other, and I think we were both a bit surprised. It was very intense and very real. \n\nNow, he is back and we're apart again. I thought it would be fine because we could still talk, skype, etc. Not the same, but I'd rather have someone like that in my life in some way than not at all. Well, he is asking if we can \"cool off.\" I'm so confused! We had conversations before parting that we would continue talking, that things wouldn't change, etc. \n\nDo I just back off for awhile and wait? Do I cut all contact?\n\nPart of me wants to say \"forget it,\" because I was probably was being naive and stupid, but then our friendship alone means a lot.\n\nI'm sorry this is vague and probably a rambled mess.", "summary": "Met a guy on reddit, became best friends, met, discovered deeper feelings, he went home, and now wants to change things."}
{"id": "t3_556i5b", "subreddit": "college", "title": "CC transfer student need help with deciding on major.", "post": "Hey everyone, \n\nThis is my third year at community college and I'm going to be applying to colleges this year. \n\nThroughout the years at community college, I've been thinking about what kind of major I should be doing or career path after college. I've never had solid grasp on what I wanted to do, so I usually followed what my parents and friends guided me towards. \n\nIn my first year at CC I thought about majoring in computer science, but after taking some programming classes I was shocked to find out it was completely different from what I thought computer science was. \n\nThen in my second year, I thought about doing electrical engineering because my dad told me it was a safe and stable major to choose, also because he works in a engineering company himself. I thought to myself this was going to be the major I'm gonna stick to, but after getting obliterated by physics classes I was discouraged and changed my mind about engineering major. \n\nNow here I am in my third year, still debating what major I should be considering. However, I was considering maybe majoring in mathematics because it is somewhat related to a career path I was interested in, which is cryptography.  \n\nHowever, I've read about some stories about math majors who've went onto upper division classes and ended up changing their majors because it was not what they expected. I'm aware of what the upper division courses for maths are like because I've looked up some problems people post, and it does terrify me quite a bit. \n\nI guess I'm worried because if I do end up majoring in mathematics, I may end up switching my major when I transfer because I don't have enough guts to handle it. \n\nI'm sure a lot of people on here had similar problems or anxiety like me, having doubts about one's ability, how did you guys decide on your major and what advice can you guys give me? \n\nSorry for my disorganized post, my thoughts are jumbled up so I can't put together my thoughts well together. I appreciate any feedback or comments.", "summary": "A CC student who will be applying to colleges this year. Worried about what to major in and worried about my ability to do well after transferring. Need guidance."}
{"id": "t3_3i230d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Update 2] I [18 M] want to ask out a girl [18 F] out on a date, general tips needed.", "post": "[Original](\n(Clarification on this one, I didn't mean the one as the girl I wanted to marry)", "summary": "Girl ignored me again, I cease conversation. Happen to run into her on campus. Should I try talking to her again?"}
{"id": "t3_2mv0mx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] really depressed, can't get ex off my mind, can't seem to want to move on.", "post": "My ex dumped me about a month and a half ago. I have been with three women in the past three weeks but it really does not feel the same at all. I talked to my ex on the phone about a week ago, just telling her that her new boyfriend is a piece of shit and that he's brainwashing her into not talking to me, etc. It might sound crazy but the only reason I was with those other women was because I thought it would win back this ex that I was seeing a lot for 2 months.\n\nShould I write my ex a love letter telling her how I feel? Should I call her once a day? Or should I just move on and try to find another girl like her? I do not want her to be the one that got away, and cannot seem to move on no matter how hard I try. She was basically my polar opposite, but I suppose that's why we were so attracted to each other.\n\nDoes true love just fade away? Why hasn't she even attempted to contact me this past month and a half when that's all I've been trying to do is to get a hold of her. Life seems so meaningless without her and I really don't know how to deal anymore. There are tons of suitable partners around me but I don't feel the same way about them to any degree.\n\nI'm really just looking for any kind of advice. I love her, she loves me, but she can't seem to get over the fact that I asked if she was being unfaithful a couple of times. When the fight occurred I was 2 weeks behind on all of my school work and in the middle of a project, so I was stressed as hell in the first place, and then she being REALLY SARCASTIC which I struggle with regardless. These two things coupled together make me unbelievably furious, and I completely over-reacted. Not to mention how little sleep I was getting while I was with her. Should I be afraid to just show up to her house and give her the love letter I've been working on?", "summary": "I really miss my ex and can't seem to get her off my mind. Should I wait for her to break the no contact (because I already have), or should I just go to her house and see her in person?"}
{"id": "t3_24vgno", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18/M] having trouble with gf [18/F]", "post": "Me and my girlfriend we're in the back of my car making out when she says she has to go home to check in, I being the idiot I am convince her to stay a couple min. Acouple min later the unthinkable happens her nazi of a mother rolls up and taps on the window. Her mom takes her home and gets her phone taken away along with most of her stuff. so we don't talk till Monday(happened on Friday, and we don't talk at all barely made eye contact in our same class. And don't talk at practice. When I confronted her about not talking at all. She said that she can't get in anymore trouble, and that it's complicated. What does this mean?? Is there another guy? Did this one incident and three days just kill the whole thing?", "summary": "nazi mom catches me and girlfriend takes daughter home. Won't talk to me, and dances around the question when asked. "}
{"id": "t3_35zamy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by sending my girlfriend a photo of a shirt", "post": "So, this just happened two weeks ago, and I'm just now facing the shit-storm.\n\nMy girlfriend does wild land firefighting. Well, so needless to say we are in a short-term long distance relationship. \n\nBack story: her and I have been friends for two years. We got together in March (Pi Day!), and she spent her vacation with me during spring break. Well, she and I had lots of sex and clothes were thrown everywhere.\n\nLast week I was cleaning my room and I found a shirt at the foot of my bed, but inside the corner of the bed frame. So, I sent my girlfriend picture of said shirt and said, \"You left this here.\" Well, she went home yesterday, and started looking through her stuff, and she had both shirts she had brought.\n\nShe sent me a text that said, \"We need to talk.\" This is also known as, \"The four words that make your buttcheeks clench.\" She calls me and tells me she has both shirts and has no idea whose shirt I have. I told her, \"Well, that makes two of us.\" I honestly don't know. \n\nI'm not fucking around on her. The last time I had sex was in December (more than likely this one's), and then there was that fooling around thing with that girl from work at the beginning of January, but no sex happened. I'm not fooling around on her, but I don't want her to feel like I am.\n\nHer tone says she is going to let it go, but I'm not trying to give her a reason to doubt me.", "summary": "sent my gf a picture of a shirt I found in an obscure place in my room, and now I think she doubts me. I am fucked."}
{"id": "t3_4elywy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I (21f) doing what is right for my daughter (3f) now that her father (23m) is dead or am I just ruining her life and my chances at potential relationships?", "post": "My daughter is 3. Her dad (23m) is dead. Her dad and I(21f) were no longer together,(we were together two years but had been broken up for two years) however I am closer to his family than my own due to years of abuse and neglect with my family.\n\nMultiple different men (26m&28m) are saying that if I want things to work out with him then I would need to cut my daughter's dad's family out of both of our lives because he and his family is going to take over their role.\n\n (Just to be clear I am not slutting around a lot, my daughter hasn't met any of these men... I just start talking to a guy, make it clear about her dad's family's role in her life and they basically tell me how they are going to take over that role and how her dad's family will start to not be involved. Then due to them saying how they don't want her dad's family in our lives I stop talking to them because I love her dad's family.)\n\nTheir basic reasoning is that her dad's family would undermine him and compare him to her deceased dad all the time. He doesn't know her dad's family and I know for a fact they never would. Also, the other part is that he believes he would become her only dad because he will be the one there for the majority of her life.. I feel as if they are wanting me to pretend her dad never existed and I don't feel comfortable with that. \n\nAm I being unrealistic thinking that all of this is wrong and that I need to avoid talking about my daughter's biological dad around her? Should I be acting like he never existed? I thought I was in the right to keep his spirit alive with my daughter because she really does act like her dad. And because I don't want her to forget him. But now I am worried that my view on this is skewed.", "summary": "My daughter's dad is dead, should I pretend he and his family never existed like these \"prospective\" bfs want?"}
{"id": "t3_4fgayu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [15 M] and my friend [15 M] have been acting \"gay\" for each other as a joke between us, but he just came out and is actually gay.", "post": "I have been friends with this person for a few months now, and we honestly get along very well. He's a funny guy, and we play a lot o' games together as bros. Whenever we're out together or at some sort of group gathering, we jokingly always act as though we are secretly deeply in love with each other and get all touchy. And up until now I thought he was straight, so I didn't really think much of it. (For reference, I am a bi-curious straight male.)\n\nAnyway, today he finally came out to me and a select few as gay after realizing he felt this way roughly 2.5 years ago. I was really happy for him, because it was honestly a huge weight off his shoulders and it makes me happy knowing that he feels better about this. However, now I feel incredibly awkward. I'm not sure whether or not it's still okay to do the whole \"gay couple\" act with him at this point, because I don't want to play with his feelings like that knowing that it might not necessarily be an act on his part.\n\nI am going to try talking to him when I get the chance and see what he says, but he's notorious for not giving very clear answers and I don't want to pressure him so soon after he has built up the courage to come out to me and a few others. But I don't know whether or not it's still okay to do this, and I'm not sure whether or not he might even have feelings for me, since he doesn't really do the \"gay couple\" thing with anyone else. I really don't know what I'm supposed to do here.", "summary": "The friend I used to pretend to be \"gay\" with is actually gay and now I don't know how to act around him."}
{"id": "t3_izojx", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "A question of character", "post": "I (24f) have lived a very sheltered life,have been quite abused (in all categories), and struggle with many health issues. What I am beginning to see in not just my SO of 5 years but others is how different their characters are from mine. \n\nFriends, it does not really bother me much. I mean i sometimes trip out on what they say and their selection of words but I don't seem to judge them as much as my SO (obviously). \n\nI have been noticing that my SO, in various situations would do something that in my opinion would be morally wrong. The thing is, all of them are literally hypothetical. Like we would watch a movie or read about something and he would say, \"oh if that was me I would have totally done blahblahblah\". Usually the blahblahblah part is something that I find totally the wrong thing to do morally. \n\nI was raised in a very abusive household and yet i'd not hesitate to open doors for elderly, try to help out homeless, and I am not against the world at all. My SO is opposite but he is totally affectionate to me and it just seems like his words do not match his actions towards me and those who are close. \n\nShould I be worried about this? I understand everyone is different and I totally respect people for their choices but it just seems like my SO would be a villain in most hypothetical situations whereas, I would be a hero. \n\nHas anyone ever encountered something like this? Is it a red flag? I mean he has loved me through all my faults, disabilities and handicaps which I think takes someone special to do so. Also, he is not abusive or negative to me or anyone at all.", "summary": "My SO is more of a Slytherin whereas i'd be in Gryffindor for lack of better example. His hypothetical choices scare me."}
{"id": "t3_2qyju6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22M] girlfriend [22F] says she wasn't initially physically attracted to me. What should I do?", "post": "Just like it says on the tin. My SO of 2.5 years recently admitted to me that she didn't initially find me attractive, although she claims that changed after she got to know me.\n\nI certainly understand that a person's overall attractiveness is a function of their personality, and one's level of attraction to a person can change over time, I'm very upset that she never felt any *physical* attraction for me. \n\nIt's great that she's \"attracted\" by my personality and all, but I can't help but feel that this isn't good enough. I thought she was physically attractive right away. I feel pretty terrible about myself that she didn't feel the same way. I don't want to go on in a relationship where I feel that I'm not good enough for her.\n\nI still love her very much, and I know she loves me. I'm pretty crushed at finding this out, and I don't know what to do about it. It seems to me that she was immature to think she could have a satisfying relationship with someone she didn't click with physically. I want her to be happy, so I can't help but wonder if we need to break it off so she can find someone who actually works for her physically.\n\nIs this an overreaction? I think I'm emotionally compromised because I'm so upset about this. So I'm hoping for advice from a few smart people here.\n\nWhat should I do? Is there a way of understanding what she's told me that doesn't make it sound so bad? What am I missing?", "summary": "girlfriend didn't feel any initial physical attraction to me, but says that changed when she got to know me. This bother me. Am I overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_n37jn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How did you escape disaster? I'll start.", "post": "8 years ago, as a sophmore, me and my buddies went to his car and smoked a bowl between classes, we show up to our next class about 5 minutes late, and the teacher being a bitch said we had to go to the office and sign in, so we do, and the office secretary obviously knew we were high so about 10 minutes after signing in, we're called into the office, I had a pipe and a 10 sack in my backpack so at this point I was shitting bricks, they placed me in this small ass 4x4 printer room with the yard duty. I knew I was screwed because the room was so small I had no chance to hide my stuff. I opened the small pocket of my backpack where everything was, and took out a pencil. I started twirling the pencil around in my hand and noticed that the yard duty was watching the pencil, so i keep doing that and then I flick it up in the air. As it falls to the ground, I reach for it, and with my other hand I grab my pipe and slide it under the printer. When my principal was done interrogating my friend I was called in. She had just escorted him to another room to sit until they figured out to do with us. I walk out the printer room, see she is across the room from her office, so I B-line into her office grab the weed and put it on the book case. Cop gets called in to search my things, and he's tripping because he keeps saying he could smell it. It was literally behind his head nose level. After searching my stuff 4 times he gives up. They lock me in the office and tell me to wait while the police officer talks to my principle. When I was alone for about 5 minutes, I took the weed off the bookcase and hid it in her desk drawer. I ended up getting suspended for being high and they tried to tell my mom I have a drug problem and wanted me to go to rehab. My mom pretty much laughed in her face and told her it's just marijuana. Never heard about it again, but the teacher did \"resign\" at the end of the year.", "summary": "Got sent to office for being high, hid pipe under printer, hid weed behind cops head, then in principles desk. She resigned at the end of the year."}
{"id": "t3_3jmnus", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Moved into guy's Apt and Moving Out 1 month in. Who finds replacement?", "post": "Hello,\nI don't know if this is so much a legal question or more of a responsibility question- So I moved out of my studio last month paying $650 per month in Chicago. I moved down the block to someone off of Craigslist because I thought the place was great. A house in a city with a porch! I love porches! But living there for a few days, I found that I didn't inspect the place well enough- the place is pretty ratty for a number of reasons, and my roommate doesn't seem that motivated to make improvements. He's a nice guy, but not really the cleanest. The situation is kind of awkward since when I brought up making improvements or contacting the landlord, he didn't seem that enthusiastic and basically responded that the landlord was unlikely to respond to fixing our broken sink and things like that. Well anyways, I found a much cheaper place ($300 cheaper per month! It's just not nearly as convenient a location: 2 miles from train instead of a block). But the people are already my friends and I think I could be a lot more relaxed there. The newer place would actually feel like my place instead of living in someone else's place.\n\nMy question is this- since my roommate described it as a month to month deal, here are my questions- \n\u2022\tWhose responsibility is it to find someone to take over my room?\n\u2022\tHow much advanced warning should I give my current roommate without making this too weird? Immediately?\n\u2022\tShould I tell him I'm leaving cuz the place sucks or should I say I found a much cheaper living situation?\n\u2022\tHow can I protect myself in this situation?\n\nI literally have not signed a thing and my name is not on anything. That may have been really irresponsible since  I don't really have any protection but I don't have any responsibilities either necessarily.\n\nIf I posted in to the incorrect subreddit, lemme know.\n\nAny advice would be helpful. Thank you!", "summary": "Moved in at beginning of September to month to month rental place without lease, decided I'm moving out end of September. who's responsible for finding new tenant- me or other roommate whose lived there whole summer?"}
{"id": "t3_2q9ebl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [m/18] got involved with a girl [f/19] in a relationship, but she doesn't know how to leave her bf.", "post": "A couple of months ago a friend and I started developing feelings for each other. She had been in a relationship of 3 years and often told me how unhappy she was with the relationship and how poorly he treats her. Things between us started getting serious and their relationship started falling apart. \n\nBeing college students on winter break, we began hanging out every day for the past month. I could tell she was finally accepting that she could leave him. We make each other very happy and often discussed our own relationship and the future. \n\nJust as I thought she was finally mustering up the strength to end it with him, his mother was diagnosed with cancer. Being together with him for 3 years, she is very close with his family and thinks leaving him would be too much for him to handle. She told me she doesn't want to lose me but can't risk hurting him right now. \n\nObviously it's a difficult situation and I'm understanding, but I can't help being upset knowing that she isn't happy. I want to make her happy and I know I can but I'm not sure what to do at this point. And no, I don't want to hear that I shouldn't have gotten involved with her in the first place.", "summary": "got involved with a girl with a bf of 3 years and just when she's about to leave him for me, his mom is diagnosed with cancer."}
{"id": "t3_4l0bal", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "19f with fiance 20m and roommate 19m- fiance and I recently got infected with scabies and have started treatment, roommate refuses", "post": "Recently, my fiance  (20 m) and I (19f) moved into a new apartment with a mutual friend (20m) and somehow contracted scabies (don't know how). We've both been itchy af and have been to the doctor who confirmed that it was scabies for the both of us. Our room mate (20m) has not had symptoms of scabies bites appear yet but I have asked him to get treated as well and to treat his clothes and linen so that our apartment does not get reinfested after treatment.\n\nMy room mate refuses to buy the lotion needed to kill the mites on his skin (if there are any on him) and refuses to rewash and dry his linen and clothes. I'm scared that if he does not get treated the infestation of our apartment will not go away. I'm almost there to asking him to move out if he refuses treatment . He is not on the lease.", "summary": "infestation of scabies mites in apartment, roommate refuses treatment and I'm scared of reinfestation. I'm itchy af D:"}
{"id": "t3_192h7m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My best friend's boyfriend is being controlling. Breaking me and my best friend apart. Any ideas?", "post": "I'm 17, she's 17. Her boyfriend is 16. Me and her hang out constantly, we also share some classes together. I've also known her longer (1year). They share no classes, he's younger, and they've been dating for 1 month. \nThe thing is, I write a FACEBOOK post about her and I jump-starting her car because we killed her battery;\n\nAnd he gets off on a storm to her about how that's \"disloyal\" or something. \nHe's messaging me now as we speak about the post and how he \"doesn't want any problems, because it's our 1month anniversary\". Fuck his problems. Any advice on what I should do? I understand that I should respect their relationship, AND I DO. But the fact that he got worked up over that is a red flag to me.", "summary": "My best friend's(F17) boyfriend(M16) gets extremely jealous over facebook post, shoots my red flag up sky high"}
{"id": "t3_1sawys", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Giving my[29m] gf/fiance [23f] an ultimatum - am I wrong?", "post": "She has extremely controlling/manipulative parents, and she's from a foreign culture. In practice, this means that she can't actually do anything with me beyond spending a few hours together, though we've been a couple for the past couple years. \"It's not right\" for her to spend the night at my place, even though I reside pretty far away; \"It's not right\" for her to go on a trip with me to visit my family in Los Angeles, which is pretty far from the Midwest; \"It's not right\" for us to go on weekend trips, because that would look bad to the gossipy neighbors/community.\n\nThis is from her and her parents. I asked her to get married a while ago, and she agreed, though said she wouldn't tell her parents until after she got her Master's degree, which is a couple years from now, as she somehow owes it to them to finish not just a regular college career, but all of graduate school, before she gets married.\n\nIt's been a while, and I have her the ultimatum: either we get married next year, you give up this cultural stuff that keeps us apart and actually do some things with me, or we part ways.\n\nShe's upset, of course, and doesn't like that I've given her such an ultimatum. I feel guilty about it; should I? Am I doing the wrong thing? I love her, but I don't know how long I can go with this semi-relationship dominated by the wishes and desires of her parents (who, by the way, she resides with).", "summary": "Gave my fiance an ultimatum: marry me, forget tradition and spend time with me before marriage, or part ways. Is that really mean?"}
{"id": "t3_4xygl7", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting run over by an ice cream truck", "post": "So, obligatory this did not happen today.\n\nYou should know I'm a guy with his pride. So when my SO started mocking my coordination for tripping over stuff, I got pretty mad and decided to prove to her that my coordination is perfect. Needless to say, just a few days later I was roaming the neighbourhood on my brand new unicycle while juggling some tennis balls (3, to be exact). \n\nThat's where the fuckup begins. One sunny day I was riding around the area when suddenly this ice cream truck appears from behind the corner and heads for me. I could do nothing but watch the kid behind the steering wheel desperately try to stop the truck - luckily, at the last moment he realised he can simply turn the wheel, so he did not break every single one of my bones, just a few ribs and a hip dislocation. \n\nTurns out was also the time when a lot of illegal immigrants began to come over here - god bless you, Merkel - so some employers felt like it was a perfect opportunity and 'hired' many those people for some shitty money without any contract or training. What's even worse is that the kid driving was quite literally this - a kid. \n\nWe finally agreed not to call the police after he promised me a free vanilla scoop every time he was around. My SO was super mad and my unicycle went straight to the garbage can, but damn me if it wasn't worth it.", "summary": "Recently got hit by an ice cream truck that was driven by an under aged illegal immigrant while I was riding my unicycle and juggling tennis balls."}
{"id": "t3_3ll9wf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By drunkenly making out in someones bathroom", "post": "So this literally just happened last night and I am typing whilst recovering on my sofa. I go to pretty intense Uni, UWO, both for work and for partying and last night I went to a friends house warming party. People were chilling music was bumping etc. Essentially I consumed 1/2 a bottle of Jack Daniels and 1/2 a bottle of tequila and somehow managed to chat up a girl, will call her J. One thing lead to another and we headed to the bathroom. As we were furiously making out and taking of our clothes, I somehow managed to slip and fall straight into the tub with her, which would have been fine, if not for the fact my head slammed against the soap holder in the tub.\n\nThe thing smashes into pieces and my head starts bleeding. A lot. My entire chest is covered in my own blood in a very short span of time. I can't feel much because of the alcohol and now J is kidda freaking out (understandably). She gets toilet paper and gets we to put pressure on the wound whilst she calls an ambulance. When we are leaving, the whole party is freaking out because they think the cops will show up. I essentially spend all night at the hospital, getting stitches whilst J (bless her) keeps me company. I ended up with 18 stitches on the side of my head. But I did get to stay at Js after I got released from hospital!", "summary": "Went to a party, got much drunker than I should have, ended up leaving the bathroom looking like a scene from a horror film, now have a new set of scars on my head but potentially wifey material"}
{"id": "t3_3xnc8h", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "USPS mysteriously sent me someone else's package - readdressed it to me [US]", "post": "Mysterious situation. Sorry about the text wall. Located in the United States.\n\nA few months ago, I bid on (and won) an auction for tools and other supplies on a popular online auction website. The package was mysteriously delayed during shipping at one of USPS's sort facilities due to what I assumed was the rather extreme inclement weather.\n\nOnce I received the package, I found a letter from the postal service INSIDE the box stating that due to a mishap at the facility there were packages that became dislodged during shipping. If any problems arose to send a letter to their complaint department. The package did not contain the tools but rather an incredibly large number of sealed DVD sets to a very popular TV show. \n\nI contacted the seller and he had no idea what I was talking about with DVDs. He stated that he sent only the items pictured in the auction. I have no reason to believe that he was being disingenuous because when you compare the price of both items on Amazon, the overall value of the DVD sets is much, much higher.\n\nAfter some back and forth with the USPS I was able to reach someone who started an official search at the three USPS sort facilities in the region. After three months they terminated the search and stated that my item was not found. I also inquired what to do with the DVDs that I received. Initially they said to keep them sealed because if my original package was found, they may need me to send the DVDs back to the sort facility. But later they essentially told me on the phone that they didn't know what to do with the DVDs.\n\nMonths have gone by, and I decided to try and recoup my money so I've started selling them locally. I've only sold a handful, but I began to wonder what kind of legal ramifications I could run into ? Also I became paranoid that the DVDs may contain some kind of elicit or illegal material so I unwrapped several of them and skimmed through them on my computer. I could not find anything out of the ordinary. They appear to simply be the entire DVD set of the TV series.", "summary": "Mysteriously sent huge box of boxed DVD sets of a popular TV show. USPS lost my original package. Seller had no idea what I was talking about. Want to sell DVDs to get my money back."}
{"id": "t3_13n32b", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "She [17F] likes me [17M] back but her best friend also likes me :\\", "post": "For the past few months, this girl (Girl 1) I go to high school with has been flirting with me and things have been going pretty well. Recently, she told her best friend (Girl 2) that she likes me and how she wants to be with me etc. \n\nWell, it turns out Girl 2 started liking me a little while before she found out that Girl 1 and I have been flirting for the past few months. Being the good friend that she is, Girl 2 decided to keep quiet about liking me because she didn't want to ruin/get in between me and Girl 1. \n\nHowever, recently Girl 2 finally cracked about how she liked me and told Girl 1 everything. Now Girl 1 is acting distant because she doesn't want to ruin her friendship with Girl 2. But the thing is, Girl 2 is encouraging Girl 1 to not give up on this relationship because Girl 2 knows that Girl 1 really likes me.\n \nAt this point, both me and Girl 1 are avoiding each other and I'm trying my best to kill these feelings I have for her because I don't want to ruin their friendship. The thing thats killing me is that we both like each other and everything would be perfect if it wasn't for this one detail :(\n\nEven Girl 2 wants us to be together and she is mad at herself for liking me and telling Girl 1 about it in the first place. \nI'm stuck in the middle of all this and I don't know if i should back off or if I should still have hope in this entire situation.", "summary": "Me and this girl like each other but her best friend also likes me and now things are messy because no one wants to hurt anyone else."}
{"id": "t3_2a1k22", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 M] broke up with my gf [22 F] of less than a month because of the trauma of being woken up by her seizures", "post": "In the beginning of a wonderful relationship, I was woken up one morning by my (ex)girlfriend convulsing beside me. She had two \"pre-seizures\" and though I supported her completely I was mortified. It was a terrifying experience. I knew that she had had them some years back, but was not warned that this might happen.\n\nThe spark was gone - it permanently changed how I felt about her, despite my efforts to keep it alive.\n\nThe relationship had been awesome up until that point, and now I can't shake the feeling that either A: I'm an asshole and/or B: I screwed up what could have easily been the best relationship of my life to date.", "summary": "Traumatized over awesome gf's unexpected (but life-long) seizures one morning, we broke up. Am I an asshole? Could I have prevented this in any way?"}
{"id": "t3_27zmo3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [21M] torn between where to go. Confused about 2 women, both [20F]. Been in a relationship with one for ~1.5 years.", "post": "Hi all. So I've got quite a long story here, but I'll try and keep it as short as possible. \n\nSo to begin, me and a woman I dated for 3 years broke up nearly 2 years ago. Contact was cut completely within 3 months, and I haven't spoken with her since. Around that time she began dating another guy. A while after this, I also began dating another woman. \n\nSo me and this woman have dated for the past 1.5 years roughly, and things have definitely had more downs than ups. We have fought constantly, never seen eye to eye, and don't share any hobbies. \n\nMy ex and I, on the other hand, completely got along, would have a few big fights here and there, and shared mostly the same hobbies. \n\nMy current girlfriend and I have been on and off for the past few months, and right now we're in a hiatus. But, for the past few weeks, I've caught myself thinking about my ex more and more, and I'm not sure why. I hadn't thought about her in a long time, and lately I can't seem to get her out of my head. I legitimately miss her.\n\nSo through the grapevine, I've heard that my ex and her boyfriend aren't exactly doing the best, and things are falling apart. I want so badly to text her or something. But I just don't know if it's right. \n\nCan anybody give me advice here? I'm absolutely lost and confused right now. Thanks to anyone who can help!", "summary": "Been broken up with ex for 2 years and dating another woman for 1.5. Really thinking about ex lately and need advice on if I should talk to her.."}
{"id": "t3_naj6l", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "This is my mom's amazing giant kitty Bart. (He was named by the shelter.)", "post": "My mom adopted him in late 2009. He was sent back from the shelter TWICE, despite the fact that the shelter strongly warned the adopting families that Bart was a mature, independent cat who didn't do well with children and needed to be the only pet. Apparently, when he was returned, it was because he was \"mean.\" My mom adopted him, let him do his own thing in the house, didn't get in his space at all, a month after she adopted him he jumped into her lap.\n\nNow, he follows her from room to room. He's friendly and loving to both me and her, and loves sitting in our laps- which can be a problem, because he's a HUGE cat who weighs like 18lbs! He's a giant panther cat stalking around, but he's a sweetheart, and even acknowledges and accepts strangers now (if they offer attention)!\n\nPoint being, if you're going to adopt, PLEASE make sure you listen to the shelter about the temperment of the cat. Cats are wonderful, loyal, loving creatures, but they are NOT submissive, they are NOT dogs, you CAN NOT \"train\" them (past a certain point), they will not BEND to you. You can support them and take care of them and they WILL love you undyingly, they will follow you around, purr in your lap and constantly try to attack your feet from under the bed. Just acknowledge that they are little people with personalities. :) Bart is a CHARACTER for sure. :)", "summary": "My mom has a beautiful giant cat named Bart. He was sent back twice and almost euthanized because people DIDN'T LISTEN TO THE SHELTER, but thankfully my mom saved him. :)"}
{"id": "t3_16n9ka", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Help me plan our honeymoon, South America in summer?", "post": "Hey /r/travel!\n\nMe and the gf are getting married june 1st and are trying to plan the honeymoon. We have 8 weeks from end of june to middle of august to spend. Our plan is to spend 1-2 weeks home in Sweden and then go somewhere semi-adventurous for the remaining 6 weeks\n\nOur initial plan was to go to South America, maybe start off in mexico and then finish off in peru or chile. From some reading from wikivoyage i got the feeling that most of SA has rain periods during summers.\n\nMy questions to you /r/travel are:\n\n1. Will it rain a lot in central/northern america during july/august?\n2. What would you recommend us seeing in these parts of the world? \n3. How far in advance do we need to book inca trail?\n\nOur interests are mainly hiking/outdoors, adventures, sports and living some of the local cultures.", "summary": "Will Central/South America be good during summers? And what should we not miss during our 6-8 weeks there?"}
{"id": "t3_25va35", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How to be the peacemaker during mine [26/m] and gf's [26/f] terrible fights.", "post": "I've been dating my gf for 11 months now and for a while I've been commuting 3.5 hours on 4 day weekends to stay at her place while I was in grad school.  Now that we spend all days together, we seem to bicker a lot.  In addition to the bickering, we'll have long 2+ hour arguments (at least once a week.  Sometimes 2 days in a row) that always, ALWAYS end with me thinking \"this is fucking crazy\" and just apologizing and eating my words and feelings to settle down the argument.  \n\nIn 11 months, I don't think once she's started the compromise/apology/or anything to end the argument.  She thinks I'm generally selfish and that I \"paint her out to be a bitch.\"  And sometimes she'll straight up lecture me like I'm a child.  \n\nIt's really hard to always have to be the first one to say sorry.  And then take the blame for the whole argument.  \n\nSometimes she even throws stuff when she's really mad.  I'm also beginning to think she doesn't respect me at all.  \n\nThe worst part is - I'm TERRIFIED of being alone.  Before I met her, I had no real friends, no life, I spent way too much time on the computer.  With her, I can be engaged soon, be living with her in an apt, have a dog (her awesome dog), and cool friends (her really nice friends).  Without her, I'd live at my parents for a while, have very rare hangouts with very few friends, be lonely as hell.  She's a great package deal.  And the thing is, I really don't think I could do better than her at all.  She's beautiful, smart, and when we do get along, it's like a fairy tale.  We have a real strong connection and compatibility when we're getting along which is about 85% of the time.", "summary": "how do I make peace with being the peacemaker and come to terms with swallowing my pride every time?  What do I do about the fact that I'm so much better off with her?"}
{"id": "t3_3m8l4d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Our friend [22M] is an an abusive relationship with [21F]. What can we do?", "post": "I am friends with a soft spoken guy - we'll call him Chad - in our social group (all friends from college) who is in an emotionally abusive relationship. His girlfriend Christina pushes him around, dictates his schedule, speaks on his behalf, and has no qualms with tearing him down in front of everyone. A few incidents have occurred over the past few months that have really made the fact that Christina is emotionally manipulative and abusive hit home. The only problem? Chad either doesn't see it, or he's too afraid to leave for fear that we will choose her over him.\n\nMy boyfriend and I want to help Chad, but we worry that Christina is keeping him from interacting with us. Our invitations to him to hang out have gone unanswered and he often seems nervous to speak with us when in a group setting. We've decided that the best course of action is to get him alone, to talk to him, and to tell him that *we are here*, we see what's going on, and we want to help. He won't be alone if he leaves Christina; he will still have us (at the very least) there as a support system.\n\nOf course, if this goes badly (if Chad doesn't leave and Christina finds out what's happened), it will cause **massive** chaos in our friend group. We will probably be unceremoniously punted from our social circle. \n\nWhat should we do? My boyfriend and I have discussed this at length, and we genuinely feel that someone needs to reach out to him and let him know that he is not alone. Emotional abuse can be absolutely soul searing, and we want to offer him a life jacket if he needs one. At the same time, we realize that this may be the beginning of the end of our group of friends. How can we approach this delicately?", "summary": "Our softspoken friend is in an emotionally abusive relationship. By bringing this up to him and encouraging him to leave or seek counseling, we risk destroying our friend group. How can we delicately navigate this?"}
{"id": "t3_tsiud", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I become unstuck?", "post": "So, I live at home and work at a job I'm not too crazy about. I've been applying to jobs I want for 2 years now, with 0 luck...I spend hours on my cover letter (even researching organization mission statements), I tailor my resume, I research the recruiter's name (but not always)...but everything feels like a dead-end. I think its because my current job is at the bottom of the totem pole and isn't related to what I want to do. I have 2 degrees and I've started a hobby website related to my career interests, but so far, still no luck.", "summary": "I'd like to move out and start my life, but nothing seems to be working. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks!"}
{"id": "t3_wnm1y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Past and present drug users/abusers/ and dealers, what are your craziest drug-related stories?", "post": "An ex-friend of mine (let's call him rob) got hurt real bad a while back and was prescribed perc's for the pain. He wasn't into the idea of getting hooked on them so he barely took the pills. One day someone asked him for a free pill, and that's where the downfall began. Eventually and slowly Rob started to distribute the pills and began selling them. After seeing how fast the money came (over 20 grand in one month) he pretty much was the biggest perc connection in the area. \n\nAt this point he was buying them illegally rather than getting them prescribed, so when his suppliers weren't able to meet the, he got about 20 grand together and flew to florida to get his pills. After finding a \"reliable dealer\" and testing some of the perc's, he was happy and bought them, then flew back. \n\nFirst deal back in my state, was a major one. Rob went to meet up with the buyer, and when they went to exchange the product, the pills... Were fake. All of them. In a single blow all his business was gone. \n\nNow this is where Robs luck truly runs out. Being a semi-small town where this was all happening, the cops caught wind after a few months. Rob had quit the dealing due to the fake pills, but barely a few days later, while Rob was at a fellow drug-dealers house waiting for pizza, things got suspicious. Their regular pizza guy wasn't the one deliviring, but it was a guy in his mid-40's. For some reason Rob opened the door, and immediatelywas bum rushed by 10 cops. \n\nBoth Rob and his friend were placed under arrest. The cops found the 10000 fake percs, and looked like they hit the jackpot, thinking they were real . Fast-forward after court, percs were found as fake and all Rob got was a year in jail for possessing fake drugs.", "summary": "guy starts dealing percs, goes big fast, gets ripped off for 10000 fake pills, gets arrested by cops with them, and gets away with only 1 year of jail."}
{"id": "t3_3pnq90", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Sketchy job offer", "post": "Long time lurker, first post ever. I'm looking for a bit of help trying to figure out if this potential job is legitimate. Regardless of my desperation, I'm typically rational when it comes to making big life decisions but last week, I received an email from a recruiter about a potential \"Project Management\" position from a VC from Delaware and all I had to do was apply on their website if I was interested. I was already sketched out but 2 things checked out: 1. Recruiter had a corporate email and 2. The website seemed really legit, so I thought that it wouldn't hurt to apply. There was no financial information requested, only my address and phone number as well as my references.\n\nOn Monday, I received another email, asking to schedule a phone interview. At this point, a lot of emotions take over and I request for a call at their soonest availability. The next day, I receive the call right on schedule by a female with a heavy Russian-ish accent. I was asked a couple basic questions like my typical workday and my career goals. It was very brief, 8-10 minutes but I immediately felt that I was being scammed. After the phone call I do even more research and found that the site has been active for only 21 days.\n\nToday, I got an email about the next step from a Sr. in Human Resources. Attached was a contract for a one-month paid training which is apparently a part of their \"screening process\" before they decide to hire full time. Again no financial info was asked from me, just e-sign the document.\n\nThe document says that the corporate address is in Kowloon and I haven't been able to find ANY contacts on linkedin but they included a bunch of address for the new office in Los Angeles. I'm going to call all the numbers to see if I could speak with anyone. How should I go about all of this to find out if this is a real job and also a what is the best way to protect myself if it isn't?", "summary": "Got a paid offer for training, can't find any info on the company but they've passed every test I know on typical job scams. What should I do to check and/or protect myself?"}
{"id": "t3_3jw3kq", "subreddit": "college", "title": "[Freshman Advice] Partying/Early Social Questions", "post": "Hey everybody!\n\nI'm going to preface this with the fact that I'm a great student, I'm on top of my studies, and I'm currently in the process of applying to clubs and getting involved with organizations around campus, that said:\n\nMy first two weeks of college has been, well, much more uneventful than I expected. I have been looking for opportunities to go party on the weekends (nothing too stupid I promise) but I can't seem to find anything. It feels like frats run the party scene at my school (UF), and the only way to have any fun on a Friday/Saturday night or tailgate is to be a part of one. Basically", "summary": "as a freshman does anybody have advice on finding parties and that sort of thing? (To be fair I've only been here two weeks but a lot of people I know were finding stuff on the first night)"}
{"id": "t3_2v0nke", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What is an appropriate and healthy way that I [31 M] can officially break up with my ex GF [30F] of 2 years.", "post": "GF on and off for 2 years and I have had major issues with her flirting through texts and various forms of social media... Every time I confronted her about it she only hid it better or took it to a different social media platform.... Have broken up many times and got back together with the intent on her working on it... This last time I decided this is it, however we said we would take a month 'break' of no contact to see if we really wanted this, then meet up and talk about our plans.....\n\nI don't want to meet up but she keeps insisting we do, seeing her would make my heart decide for me and I know I will end up with her again, or at the very least, sleep with her again... I know thats not healthy. I love this woman, deeply, if not for the lack of trust and her decision to continue the flirty behavior, I would more than likely marry her. I want her to really work on herself and grow and be happy with her life after this break. I want to break up formally with her but I'm not sure how to do so in a healthy way. She says she needs closure but I don't know what to say. I'm not going to see her face to face, I dont even want to talk on the phone. But I want to break up in a healthy contructive way where we both leave this better than when we came in.... \n\nHelp?", "summary": "I don't know how to break up with my GF of 2 years in a healthy way. Want to look for a constructive way to break up. help"}
{"id": "t3_37pj1q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M17] have dated this girl [F17] twice in this year and she dumped me twice, we are still friends, I realize I still liked her a lot, should I just ask her out again? Help", "post": "We're both currently enrolled in high school. Me and her dated for several weeks during the end of the last year's school year. After summer break, school started and we had classes together and we both became friends again, eventually we got back together, but then she dumped me again only after a short period of time (less than a month) cause of something I did which was not serious at all. Semester one passed , we are still friends to this day. And I feel like I still really adore her and such. I'm just wondering whether I should just tell her that I like her again or should just forget her and start new relationship.", "summary": "This girl dumped me twice in one year, but I still really like her, wondering if I should ask her out again."}
{"id": "t3_3i7isn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "This girl I'm seeing [26F] wants to stop seeing me bc of my financial situation. I'm [24M]", "post": "So I've been seeing this girl for almost a month and we really like each other, but ever since I've been hanging out with her my credit card dept has increased by 1500 dollars....on top of that I also owe 10000 in dept to student loans + car payments. I want to get rid of this dept asap, this way I'll be able to build my capital. \n\nSo when I told her that I want to cut down on my spending she said that it was a huge turn off for her and that what I said is a dealbreaker. \n\nSo should I just let the two of us break up, while I'm still not fully emotionally attached to her, or should I find a compromise with her? Or should I allow us to break up without resistance because she couldn't understand that I need to work on my finances (knowing that this issue would cause problems in the long run)?", "summary": "I'm in dept and want to cut down on spending, and because of this she wants to breakup with me."}
{"id": "t3_ox929", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dropped out of college as of a weeks ago, what can I do?", "post": "*week\n\nI was looking to major in Computer Science Engineering but couldn't even get through my statistics and Physics course.    I now have 33 credits and a C- average.  My college was one that was wellknown for it's engineering program.  I've made one SQL database in my entire life, and have only had novice experience in Java.  I am lost and don't know what I want to (and still can) pursue at this point.\n\nI am feeling dejected and down.  The college was all I ever wanted, it gave me grant that paid for the tuition completely and most of room and board.  I am regretting and blaming myself for being unmotivated and didn't seek help until it was too late.  I know and it's all my fault.\nI also cannot pay for college out of my own pocket.\n\nReddit, what can I do?", "summary": "Thanks, I'm going through a rough patch, just need someone/a community to talk/listen to, anymore advice please?"}
{"id": "t3_2uqa23", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not paying attention to my Facebook messages", "post": "I am currently deployed to Afghanistan, and the military life has been pretty hard on my marriage. I've been having a lot of my mind and you could almost say borderline depressed. There is a lot of stuff that I can't just tell my wife, especially over a social network site, but I don't lie to her. I tell her I have a lot on my mind and I will tell her all about it when I get home. I didn't think it meant anything beyond that. My job here is a desk job, and I get a phone call from my supervisor about the 15th rumor of when we are actually going home. So, I message my wife, \"oh my jesus, I just don't care anymore!\" What I then noticed is that she sent something just before that that went along the lines of, \"I think I know what's been on your mind. I know we haven't had the best marriage due to your deployments but we've been through too much just to give up.\" Of course right after I see that, I attempted to correct myself. I typed 2 words and then, out of nowhere, power outage. Our internet went down for numerous hours and I think my wife thinks I really don't care about our marriage anymore. When it finally came back up, I got to send the message I meant to send and apologized. She hasn't messaged me back yet...", "summary": "Didn't pay attention to a previous message from my wife and made it look like I didn't care about our marriage."}
{"id": "t3_43lz06", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24M] told my roommate to move out by May, my girlfriend [29F] wanted by the end of February, and is now calling the relationship over.", "post": "Long story. Ultimately, my girlfriend who I have been with for about 7 months now, has never liked my roommate and thinks he is the devil, full of darkness. I will grant her this, his drinking habits do bring in some darkness and have caused problems. I see this need for roommate shift, and me wanting to live alone (and eventually with her) as our lifestyle choices no longer matching up. To her, I choose my roommates wellness over hers. I gave a date I felt comfortable with since it is my grad school graduation month, which I decided going in I would want to live alone afterwards, but to her, I am a pussy and surrendered. I see it as me having a heart for a long time friend.", "summary": "Girlfriend wanted my roommate to move out by February's end, I gave a different month, now the relationship may be over."}
{"id": "t3_1u3f8x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] may have some serious feelings for my hairdresser [21-23 F] I want to spend new years together and I need some serious advise!", "post": "So currently I am 19 years old. I think she between 21-23, not married, and has been cutting my hair for a few months. She always gives me dollars off my next hair cut and hums ever so sweetly. She talks to me about making up our own stories and intrigues me ever so. I can't get her out of my head and as I was walking out I heard her say \"no\". As I left I got a burst of inspiration and wrote my name with my phone number. Rapping it in a dollar I told the other person to make sure she gets this. There is a small chance I may have wrote the wrong number down. Regardless, I want to call up the hair cutting place and ask if she is there. If she is, I can buy some hair jell and ask her out. Would this be wise? I need advise!\nStill no call the next day...I really want to spend new years eve with her. Should I put forth more effort to contact her? I really hope that I can build a relationship and explore my sexual fantasies with this individual. She is all I can think about. Reddit, I really need advice to handle this situation. I am so lost.", "summary": "I have bad feelings for my hairdresser and want to spend new years with her. She is amazing. I gave her my number but no response. May have wrote down the wrong number...*"}
{"id": "t3_2mgt9n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "an old flame [27M] and I [21F] are considering a FWB situation, but I'm a little uneasy.", "post": "brief background: met James earlier this year through OkCupid. we went on a phenomenal date, had great sex, and were both pretty into each other. James is bipolar and lives two hours away, and a few days after our great date, he told me that he didn't think he was stable enough for a relationship with that much distance (he's an artist so money is sporadic). I was pretty bummed, deleted him off of Facebook, and moved on.\n\nfast forward to last week. I started dating someone after James and that relationship ended last week. by coincidence, a few days later James reached out to me to ask how I was and to say he'd been thinking about me. we decide we should hang out in the next few days and meet in the middle at a hotel (to spare the distance and because I needed to get out of my house). we get drunk, have sex, cuddle, have a great time, even spend the next day together going to a few shops.\n\nnow James and I are talking about striking up a FWB arrangement, but I guess I'm a little concerned. the emotions weren't there when we hung out last week but I think that has a lot to do with my relationship recently ending and I have a feeling that if we have sex regularly knowing that we already had strong feelings for each other at one point, it's going to turn into a relationship. I guess I just don't know if you can have one without the other in this situation.\n\nany advice? anyone been in this situation and can share their experience? I wouldn't be opposed to a relationship with James way down the line and I think he knows that, but obviously with the distance and his instability, it's a little hard to gauge.", "summary": "old flame and I hook up after ending things due to distance. want to pursue a FWB arrangement, but not sure if you can have a true FWB with someone when you both have feelings for each other."}
{"id": "t3_40366g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [30 F] colleague [28 F] is cherry-picking my responsibilities at work - what do I do?", "post": "I've been working at my current company in the marketing department for 5 months, colleague in question has been there for one year. The company is a start up and only two years old. \n\nRecently, my colleague was given a lateral promotion of sorts: She's going from running our digital marketing to managing brand communications, as the former role wasn't really working out.  The head of our department (who hired me but didn't get along with her) resigned a few months ago. My colleague is temporarily being managed by the CEO, who told her to write her own job description.\n\nSince this shift in her role a month ago, she's been suggesting to me and others that she now has some management authority over me and the work I do. It started with unwanted suggestions on how I should do my job and her cutting me off in meetings (she talks LOADS) but now is escalating to her trying to take elements that were originally in my job description for herself (i.e. blogger outreach) and delegating tasks to me. She's positioning herself as middle management but as far as I know no one has officially given her this authority.\n\nIt's clear to me that she has no direction in what she's supposed to be doing and is therefore trying to make herself look busy/important, but I'm finding it increasingly challenging to deal with her. Some of my colleagues have noticed this behaviour from her too and one said she's toxic to the business, so I'm trying not to take it personally.  However, the management team love her so I'm hesitant to say anything to my temporary manager. I realised today, though, that I am now miserable in a job I used to enjoy. What should I do? Should I try to talk to her or just bite the bullet and go to my manager?", "summary": "Colleague is overbearing and it's driving me up the wall, but key managers (including mine) think she's great. How should I handle this so I don't go from being a top performer to  fired over this?"}
{"id": "t3_2fj9u1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[17/m] Lost [16/f] contact info!", "post": "Okay so i am asking, and i'm going to try to request advise in the most non-creepy way i can think of. Here goes nothing. So basically i am 17 and i went on a vacation with my family. While in branson i met the most amazing girl in my life. She looked stunning and we had everything in common i.e. we talked the entire day without really doing much else. I could tell we were an instant click so by the end o the day she gave me her phone number and she told me where she lived which, coincidentally, is about half an hour away from me. When we said our goodbye it felt like the da best eva especially considering i didn't know what would happen. The next day my phone crashes and by the time i get it fixed my parents changed the carrier company so my sim card got wiped. I started freaking out because i don't remember her last name or her phone number. The thing i have to go on is her first name her neighborhood what high school and what she looks like. Does anyone know how to i can find her? I already tried social networking but to no avail.", "summary": "I met a chick who clicks with me and i lost her contact info. I need a new way to find her."}
{"id": "t3_2rx0pz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Agreed to meetup Saturday but haven't heard from since", "post": "Hello reddit..\nI need some advice. I've been talking with this girl for about 2 weeks now. We went out last weekend and it went great. We were working on setting up another date and she told me that she was concerned about distance (its about a 30 minute drive). I messaged her back and said that i agree with her but there are ways around it. Anyways, after that she messaged me that sue would like to try and said that maybe we could set something up for Saturday (tomorrow) i replied that that sounded great and i was looking forward to it. I havent heard anything since (this was tuesday night). Ive texted her a couple of times just wishing her a good day at work (no more than once a day). I'm not sure what to do. Part of me wants to text her again but its now been about 5 texts since her last response. Any advice would be appreciated!", "summary": "Went out with girl. She was concerned about distance but decided she wanted to try anyways. Set something up for saturday (no set time etc.) Haven't heard from her sense. 5 texts now with no response"}
{"id": "t3_32o68g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] hanging out with a bunch of girls too much a bad thing?", "post": "I came home after being away the last couple of years. During my time away I developed a lot of confidence particularly around girls. I have been getting a decent amount of attention from girls who I feel are expressing interest, and I have dated some of them, whilst being friendly and texting others. \n\nI'm currently single and I wouldn't mind having a girlfriend but I'm just kind of going with the flow right now. Basically, I see a lot of potentials but I'm not really worried about making any moves, however I can sense signals. I'm just worried about making friends with too many girls and fear that I may be leading some on while I'm just happy being friends. I find myself hanging out with a lot of girls, I just enjoy their company more than guys. Is it bad to have too many friends that are girls? \n\nI am not trying to brag. I'm just a little concerned as to where this may be heading. Does reddit have any ideas/thoughts/ways to handle this?", "summary": "Hanging out with a bunch of girls, I just enjoy being friends but fear I'm leading some on. Is it bad, what should I do."}
{"id": "t3_40dish", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24/M] and my closest friend [20/F] of 1 1/2 years - she doesn't want a relationship (with anyone, just not me) but has feelings for me.", "post": "Her and i got into a fight a few months ago and we both told each other we have feelings for each other, so naturally I asked her out. She told me she doesn't want one even though she has strong feelings for me. Whenever her and I get really close to each other she pulls away and we fight. this is a continuous cycle. I finally asked her why she does it and she told me it's because she doesn't want to get hurt again. she wants to be friends but is too scared to date again.\n\n   I do like her but just being friends is also torturing me. I want to prove to her that some people can be trusted. She said she doesn't want to lose me but I just don't know what to do. I told her i needed to be alone for a while to think of my next move. I don't want to lose her either but just being friends isn't enough.\n\n   Maybe I'm being childish but its killing me inside that she won't even though she flat at told me she does. Should i give her some space? Maybe I need to move on. I just don't know.", "summary": "best friend and I have strong feelings for each other, but she is scared to date. Should I continue trying with her, or let her go."}
{"id": "t3_221o5t", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "foreman won't talk to me", "post": "Hey so I started this job two years ago. I am thinking of going elsewhere. I just wanted to confirm with you guys that I'm making a good choice.\n\nWhen I started there, there was a co worker who started 4 months before who would berate me and yell at me and my foreman would go around telling everyone that this co worker was the best and best worker they have ever seen.\nI went and told my boss about the verbal abuse and harassment after a month this co worker quit.\n\nFor the next 8 months this foreman than would glare at me and tell me to work harder and tell me I wasn't a good worker, among other things.\nI did tell him to treat me fairly and that hey this isn't right.\n\nSo things settled for a while. Now for the last three months. He doesn't even talk to me at all anymore. He will talk through our work lead to talk to me.\nI have tried talking to him but all i get is one word answers\n\nI take it he's either just hates me or is intimidated to talk to me cause I stand up for myself.\n\nI have been looking for a new job and might have a new one in two months. But it does eat me up a bit that it has gotten to this point and oh yeah he is nice to everyone (just wish he would grow up and talk to me about the problems he's having in his head with me)", "summary": "foreman glares at me still, doesn't talk to me, has to tell our lead if he needs to say something to me, responds in one word answers"}
{"id": "t3_4381l5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Long distance BF of 3 years (18M) doesn't seem that excited to see me (18F)", "post": "My long-distance boyfriend is home for the weekend but he doesn't seem that excited to see me. I met him on his way back from the coach station yesterday evening, after I'd been at college and work. I just wanted to hug him and kiss him straight away, but he kind of just ignored that / didn't reciprocate. Example: I pulled him towards me and kissed him when we were walking up my street, just because I haven't kissed him for 3 weeks and I wanted to. It wasn't forced or anything, but then he kept saying we should stop because we're in the middle of the street (it was 10:30pm, no one else around) and we should 'save it for later' (I'm at college/work 'later').He also said the same thing, and that I was getting 'carried away', when we were kissing after he walked me home. Isn't that a good thing?\n\nHe is pretty shy and does tend to internalise a lot, but we're very close and open with each other. \n\nWe've only been apart 3 weeks this time but found it more difficult than other times. It was all 'I miss you' texts, but now he's home... I don't know. \n\nI don't know if I've just got unrealistic expectations of what his reaction 'should' be. I kind of want him to jump on me and hug me and kiss me. I guess I just didn't feel that wanted. BUT I don't know if I'm just over romanticising / idealising the situation. \n\nNote: we've been together 3 years and have been long distance for 4 months.", "summary": "my long distance boyfriend doesn't seem that excited to see me. Are my expectations of what his reaction 'should be' unrealistic? Thanks in advance x"}
{"id": "t3_1hku9p", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Me [29:M] recently broke up with my gf [28:F] and now I don't know if I'm regretting it or just missing her...", "post": "Here's the post about our breakup a few weeks ago - \n\nNow I find myself thinking about her more and more each day. I know there were parts that weren't great, because I can read that post. However, we've had a little bit of contact here and there, but nothing about the breakup. Just chit chat things about finding a place to live and stuff. We're still friends on Facebook and Twitter and she *seems* like she's doing all right, but maybe she's just doing that to make me feel less guilty...? I don't know.\n\nI guess I'm just not sure what it is I'm feeling. I thought I'd be able to just move on and be fine because I was never really emotionally invested. Am I just bothered because she *seems* all right or do I really care more than I think I do? I want to send her an email (yes, an email of all things) and tell her what I'm going through and that maybe I'd like to hang out some time soon. I'm just afraid of building her hope (and mine?) up and then letting us both down if that feeling isn't there again...I'm not sure what i want to do here and I just don't know exactly what it is I'm going through. \n\nShould I send her an email? Should I try and get together with her and see if something is there? Should I even try? Or should I just delete her from social media and invoke a strict NC? Any advice would be decent.", "summary": "broke up with my girlfriend a few weeks ago, thought I'd be fine...now I don't know what I'm feeling. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_1kg35v", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by fishing down my top for money to pay for cigarettes.", "post": "My mother and I recently passed an enjoyable week in Spain. On our last evening there, she remembered that my father had asked her to buy him some tobacco, as it's cheaper there than at home. So we wandered along the city streets of Madrid until we found a tobacco shop. I waited outside, then after a while she beckoned me in. She was twenty euros short, and remembered that she had given me 50 euros for emergencies. Which I had placed in my passport-carrier around my waist, under my clothes. While in airports getting out my passport simply involved lifting up my top slightly to remove my passport, on this evening I had chosen to wear a dress. Given that reaching under my dress to the purse would involve flashing my underwear to a shop of Spaniards, I decided that the most decent option was to plunge my hand down the top my dress, rummage for a while finding the zip on the passport holder, extracting the note and closing the zip, then to slowly remove my hand holding the 50 euro note without accidentally pulling up the dress. This attracted a fair few stares, and I was thankful to leave shortly afterwards.", "summary": "Money needed to pay for father's tobacco was in pouch under my dress, had to rummage round with my arm between my boobs to get it out."}
{"id": "t3_3rnogx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my GF [20F] for 4 years, she wants to explore the outside world but I still love her so much", "post": "My girlfriend who has been with me for 4 years since we were 16 started showing signs of lost interest, her texts are short and short and simple despite me sending long texts and she sometimes find me clingy and annoying although I didn't do anything different from the past 4 years. I txted her my feelings and she said we should give each other some time and space, and that she doesnt want to commit to anything for her life because we're only 20 and she wants to explore since we're both each other's first.\n\nI still love her a lot and we agreed to just give each other a week but I cannot resist myself from sending her our memories or wanting to talk to her. My heart stings really bad because she was a big big part of my life for a long time and now my life feels meaningless when I go to work or school. \n\nI feel horrible every minute especially when I wake up and when I'm at home alone, what should I do about this? Should I wait at her house or txt her today ( its been 3 days )? I feel so helpless, lonely and sad and all I want is her..", "summary": "GF for 4 years since 15 wants to explore the outside and doesnt want to commit to me forever yet, I still love her a lot but not sure what I can do"}
{"id": "t3_559mc2", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(19m) I have some unresolved issues and it is plaguing my relationship with my (18f) girlfriend...", "post": "So, I don't usually post this kind of stuff but I honestly don't know who to turn to for help. Since I was 14 I have had a crush on my best friend (well... more than a crush) and she has had the same feelings for me. However, we were both too scared to make the first move and entered a bit of a stalemate for four years before she got asked out by some guy and I tried to move on. I started dating my girlfriend shortly afterwards and it lasted about 8 months, then things fell on the rocks on account of an acquaintance of ours and she dumped me. We are giving it a second go but things are still really shaky and one of the biggest problems is the situation with my aforementioned best friend... We still have strong feelings for each other and almost every night after she's had a few and I'm honestly too exhausted to give a damn (pretending not to have feelings is hard ok?) we always turn to talking about how things could have been and how we each wanted the other to make the first move. My girlfriend has started to notice the tension and fully expects me to dump her though I have no intention of doing so... Also I should mention that one of my exes came out of the woodwork, falsely accused me of sleeping with and impregnating her and told my current girlfriend who now has no faith in me at all. Her parents also hate me due to the original scandal with the mutual acquaintance and for some reason, she is blaming herself for all of this and wants me to dump her while also not wanting me to dump her... CAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME? Thank you in advance...", "summary": "I'm trying to date a girl despite all odds and still having feelings for another person whom I know I'll never get with and its ruining my ability to treat her like she deserves... advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2blhi2", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Hit a wall, or fell off a cliff, during my marathon training", "post": "I have a problem with running and am hoping to hear that my problem is fairly common and that there's an easy solution. I'm not sure. \n\nI am currently training for my first half- and full-marathons, in Chicago this September and October. I have been running consistently for the last few months. Maybe not as much as I should, but running 8 miles at 80 minutes was no problem and something I did a few times per week. I had a 14 miler that had some walking, and many shorter ones. \n\nTwo weeks ago I left to do some traveling. I packed my gear and intended to do some serious running while away. But I was quickly frustrated because I couldn't seem to run more than 2 miles without losing all steam. At first I thought I just had a bad day. But it's been two weeks now, and not once have I managed three straight miles. \n\nThese are all my guesses: \n\n1. Switched time of day that I run: I was running late mornings, early afternoons. During my trip, I had to shift to the early mornings. I figure this was needed anyway, since the half and full marathons are morning runs. \n\n2. Change of bed? \n3. Stress due to travel? This was all in the northern midwest, though, so I wasn't grappling with significant climate or elevation changes. \n4. Change of diet? I had been eating fairly lean before, but then was wiped out by a hard run for days at a time. A friend told me I should be eating a lot more. I increased my diet, and my running plummeted. \n5. Reduction in alcohol consumption. Yeah, this one is weird. I was drinking too much and cut way back, down to nothing for a week (which is a long time for me). Energy plummeted a few days later. \n\nAny thoughts? Anyone have a similar experience? Should I be worried?", "summary": "Could run 8 miles with no problem, often more. Some changes happened, can't run 3 miles. Not sure why."}
{"id": "t3_2nq1dc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [23 M] started dating a lovely woman [23 F], what does she mean?", "post": "OK, so I've started to date (4 dates so far) this woman who is really nice. We met at a college extra curricular lecture and things have been going swimmingly. My issue is me I believe, and I really could do with some advice.\n\nSo I'm really inexperienced with women and I'm pretty much flying by the seat of my pants right now and just trying to keep my head above the water so I'm doing my best to try and not scare this woman away. In my quest to do this, I've realised that I haven't really initialised any physical contact and it has all come from her. So for instance, at the end of the second date she gave me a peck on the cheek as way of saying good night. After the fourth date, I was still scared of offending her by holding her hand and putting my arm around her (I not a smooth man!) and she ended to date by just gunning for it and sucking my face off (totally not complaining!). Anyway, I decided to text her that I really like her and that the reason I haven't made a move yet is because I wasn't sure she'd appreciate it. She text back saying that she's not looking to rush into anything and moving slowly is maybe the way to go but she really enjoyed the evening as is looking forward to our next date. What does she mean by this?", "summary": "I'm awkward, woman kisses me, I apologise for being a wimp, she says she's not looking to rush into anything, what does that mean?"}
{"id": "t3_i8vay", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Tricked into monogamy", "post": "26, f here. I started having sex with this 31 year old guy I know through friends, thinking he was casual about relationships. 1.5 years later I suddenly find myself hearing about how I'm spending too much time with other guys and he doesn't feel like I'm that into him. I do try to make him feel loved, but I thought we agreed from the start that this isn't what we want.\n\nWe both want this relationship, but disagree on the terms. I don't want to be exclusive, but I want him. Why is it that the one who wants the exclusivity always seems to be more in a position to make demands, even when otherwise was specified from the start? The advice I get is \"Leave, you want different things\" or \"If you like him he should be enough\". Why is the jealous one assumed to be the one who'd have the hardest time giving the other person what they need? \n\nAnd yes, we have talked. He won't have it and he's making me feel like the one that's breaking us up. \n\nI'm not talking about fucking lots of guys, even kissing is off the table.", "summary": "After falling for a guy I discover that he doesn't want to be as casual as he told me from the start and now I have two less than tempting options."}
{"id": "t3_3hz4lj", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(18/M) Don't know if I should pursue her(17/F), some opinions would be nice.", "post": "So I just want to clarify that no I'm not a anti-social guy who is being friendzoned by a girl who is out of my league.\n\nSo I'm taking a friend of mine who is super pretty to my matric dance(prom) and I started becoming more interested in her after I asked her to go with me on a date. So I asked her and we are planning to go on a date after I finish writing my exams and before the dance(prom), and she seemed keen when I asked her so I guess that's something to go on. Also at the beginning of the year my one friend tried to set the both of us up to go out and from what he told me she was interested in me but it never happened because we just weren't comfortable with each other then and it was difficult to speak to her at first.\n\nNow the problems start with the fact that I'm moving next year to another city 12 hours away from where we live to go to varsity. Now I stay committed when I get into relationships but long distance would be tough on me and I'm not sure about her. I brought it up with her before I asked her out that I'm going to be leaving and she seemed pretty disappointed by it.\n\nThe second problem for me is that this year was also the first time I've been in love with someone and the first time a girl rejected me when I asked her out - this is a long complicated story I don't wanna explain XD. Anyway some days she would pop up in my mind and I would get bummed out about it and also somebody in my grade is bringing her to the dance so that kinda sucks a little. After I stopped speaking to this girl that I fell in love with the girl I'm taking to the dance seemed to become a little bit more interested in me and started talking to me more often.", "summary": "Not sure if I should go for this girl as I'm moving next year and there's some issues with a past love interest."}
{"id": "t3_1zjxt3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (22M) girlfriend (20F) of one year can't be alone and I am afraid it will drive us apart.", "post": "I wanna preface this by saying I have two different questions,  but they both seem to stem from the same issue. \n\nI've been with my girlfriend for nearly a year now and the relationship has been great. We're both pretty different people,  but we have been able to work out whatever issues have come up except for this one; she cannot be alone and I feel like a dick when I need alone time. \n\nI spend nearly every waking moment with her and while I love the time we spend together,  I need some time to focus on myself and do some things I enjoy, like video games, that she doesn't want to be a part of. I rarely get any such time because she needs someone to be with her. \nShe has some pretty severe depression and while shes on medication for it, there are times that it only helps so much. There have been nights where she has talked about killing herself or starting drugs and I rush to her. When its normal and I leave, she is sad, but tells me its okay. I feel like a dick for taking time for myself and worry because I want her to be okay. I don't know how to convey that I need space for myself without making her think I don't want to spend time with her.      \n\nThis leads me to my second problem; I'm leaving for law school in about six months and im very worried about leaving her alone and being unable to be there for her. \n\nI have tried to bring it up before,  but she threw it back to me and said I was calling her crazy and that I wanted to break up with her. I'm just very scared of her doing something serious to herself when I can't be there for her and I don't want any resentment to come from this. I told her she needs to work on this, but her reasoning is that shes going to be okay the next day so it's okay, I disagree though. She has admitted that she can't be alone which frustrates me even more that she won't try to get help. I don't want to do a long distance relationship only for her to tell me that she needs someone around.", "summary": "my girlfriend can't be alone, I don't know how to tell her I need time alone and can't always be there, Im also leaving for law school and scared for her and our relationship that I can't be there."}
{"id": "t3_2oyl0a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Having relationship problema because of too much sex", "post": "Its kinda odd that our relationship has been starting to hit rocky shores because of this topic but it seems very reasonable. My girlfriend and I (both 17) are starting to have relationship problems, as we are starting to fight more, get in more arguments and just frankly not get along too well. \n\nWe've been dating for more than a year and our sex life has been better than excellent. But it's starting to come to the point now that she feels that all I am interested in half the time is just having sex since it is all we do. Whenever were at each others houses we always have sex like its a given as to what we would do that day. She thinks that it's starting to take a toll on our relationship as we can't do anything but have sex like hangout without it. Obviously I love her so very much and don't want our relationship to end but it seems its very close to the finish. \n\nI really want to change our ways because I do believe half of it is my fault because of how horny I am. (trust me she is also very horny too) I don't know why but it always seems I get too heated in the moment and want to rip my clothes off and have sex with her but I really need to control that now since she sees the negatives of only having sex. we both go to school at the moment so we don't spend that much time together other than school so when we do see each other we are going to have sex. what should I do if I want to try and fix my relationship as its too based on the sex we have? (ofc its not the ONLY thing we do but it is a good portion) I love her and I really want to fix things as I understand how she feels and how she thinks our relationship is too based on sex. Would love to hear some of your guyss opinions and stories.", "summary": "always had a lot of sex with my girlfriend, she is starting to think that's what our relationship is based on and is unsure if she loves me anymore."}
{"id": "t3_3qx7mo", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by letting 13 year old girls play with my DJ set before my show.", "post": "So I was playing a bar mitzvah, it was actually my first DJ gig as an official DJ, I'd played house parties and stuff but this was my first time getting paid. Anyway, for all the parties I used a pair of computer speakers, Alesis Elevate 3s if you must know, but this was a bigger venue so I decided to use a different setup. \n\nI used my big huge Klipsch kt-lcr speakers but I couldn't find an amplifier, so I used my AM/FM stereo, a fairly nice one from the 90's, I'd been DJing with this setup in my bedroom for a while and everything worked fine if you kept the bass down a little. \n\nI got to the party a little bit too early and I was still setting up. The bar mitzvah kid's twin comes up with one of her friends and asks if they can play with my set. It's all setup so I thought \"Eh, what could possibly go wrong\" I delve under the mess of wires and cords to setup a few lights when I smell a plasticy smell and start to see smoke.\n\nThe noise starts to spontaneously weird out, the bass cutting in and out, until it just stops altogether. Anyway I come out from under the set and look at my board, the girls had cranked the bass and were scratching. I couldn't really tell about the bass, the speakers were pretty bassy and they were scratching. I shooed them off and thought maybe they were messing with the high-pass. I cue up another song and I hear a groan from my setup and then smell more smoke. I finally see it.\n\nMy FM/AM receiver is in flames. I immediately unplug it and start waving away the smoke, the fire has already started to go out. I wait a couple minutes for it to cool then try to play something else, but the lights on the stereo won't even come on. I had to play the rest of the show through the bar mitzvah's crappy bass amp.", "summary": "Let two 13 year old girls play with my set before the show, they jack up the bass and burst my amp into flames so I have to play the show on a crappy bass amp."}
{"id": "t3_17p5a7", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "I need some advice!!", "post": "I wanna start off with a back story. I've been overweight for as long as I can remember... I really first noticed it when I was about 9-10 years old at that point I tried to become more active but shortly lost it when my dad got a new job. Around that same time I had also expressed to my mom that I felt food was the only friend I had and was the only friend that could move with us. Fast forward to when I was a freshman in HS I became increasingly more active because I didn't have a bus to take me to school and back. At this point my mom decided to put the family on weight watchers and we got a gym membership.  I went from being 230 lbs to being 175! I felt awesome but still had a bit more to go! I kept most of that weight off for a year until my mom stopped trying anymore and started making and buying crap foods. \nI'm now 22 years, 5'11\", and a whopping 250 lbs. I'm done with it! I want to lose the weight! I envision myself about 100 lbs smaller! My biggest road blocks at this point, my husband doesn't need to lose weight, healthy food is expensive, and I have a slipped vertebra and bulging disc in my lower back.. exercising too much causes excruciating pain. \n\nBasically I need advice.  What should I do, how should I do it, is there anything that's helped jumpstart your weight lose endeavours? I know I just need to do it, but how?  How can I just do something when it feels like all odds are stacked against me...?", "summary": "been overweight most my life, gained back all weight lost and then some, healthy food costs to much, have medical problems, need help! "}
{"id": "t3_42eskt", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19F] I have a gross girly crush on a co-worker [21M] but I don't know whether to give up or pursue", "post": "Throwaway because my manager is a redditor.\n\nI started work at a college job a few months ago, first started off because I needed money, but now I really love it and I would hate to leave my job. My shifts are timetabled around availability and lectures so sometimes I won't see some of the people on my team for weeks at a time. Worked my first shift with one of my coworkers a couple months ago and my first reaction was that he is totally my type but I should just get over it because I should be professional. Work a couple more shifts with him and we talk during the breaks about our interests, and he'd always greet me with a smile and ask me about my day. He's quite a quiet guy and I see him around every now and again on campus outside of work, but not much.\n\nThen I fucked up and caught feelings. \n\nHere's the kicker: because of timetabling availabilities, I haven't seen him since mid-December and I don't know whether it's weird for me to have feelings for him even though we haven't talked or seen each other for almost a month and a half. He graduates this year so part of me wants to pursue it, but the other part of me really really doesn't want to make things awkward at work. I also know that he's busy with extra-curricular activities and his degree as well, so I don't want to waste his time. I've been to some nights out where I thought that he would go as well with his friends as so I could 'coincidentally bump into him' but he doesn't show for most of them so I haven't hung out with him outside work.", "summary": "shy, awkward 19 year old female too young for office romances. I assume this is how romcom characters in office romances feel."}
{"id": "t3_1f2uk8", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (21m) seeking advices with (21f) i've been seeing/dating.", "post": "so i (21m)'ve been seeing this girl (21f), we went on couple dates and its pretty clear that we like each other, the problem is that after our lunch date today, she drove us back to her college, and about to go to a show with her friend, i was gonna meet up with my mate from the same college, anyway, of the all the recent times we caught up, we either end it with kisses or at least hug, but nope she didnt do either today, the scenario was us two and her friend, i thought she was in a rush so didn't worry about it coz i was planning to see her again after i caught up with my mate. i asked her when does the show finish, she told me its 3hrs ish, i told her i might still be around, told her to text me when it finishes. time forward 3hrs(we actually studied in the 3hrs time), didnt get a reply from her, so i started leaving her college, on the way out, of course she is on her way back, this time with our common friend (20f), so we(3 of us) chatted for a bit(like normal friend convo for couple minutes) it was getting weird, so i was like ok im gonna go now, i was expecting she'd come give me a hug or something but nope again, she's acting like we are normal friends and still havent heard from her....\n\nso what do you guys think? we actually never discussed what we are, but i know for sure she's not that type of girl who wants a fling, she wants something serious. now i think about it, when there are people around us who know her, she wouldn't hold my hand or anything intimate, only when we are alone, she'd let me hold her hands and make out.", "summary": "been on dates with a girl, but never discussed what we are, and she doesn't want her friends find out about us, but her mum knows about us, what should i do?"}
{"id": "t3_pefdj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit, what are some things you've done to blow  your GF/BF away for Valentines day?", "post": "Im taking my GF(you know that girl that you finally get a chance with and recently just started seeing and so far she has been nothing short of amazing...yeah that's this girl) out for a 4 course Italian dinner with bottomless champagne. \n\nWhat can i do to really impress her besides the dinner? She fucking hates flowers and sappy ass shit. \n\nI'd like to hear both the success stories of what worked and the failed stories of what definitely doesn't work. At the end of the story please share your current relationship status you have with the person from your story...", "summary": "Tell us wtf you did for someone on Valentine's Day whether it worked or not and if your still in a relationship with that person."}
{"id": "t3_1w630j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend (M/19) talking to girl that hit on me (M/19) previously. Do I tell him?", "post": "So I am extremely good friends with one of my bros. I used to work at a low paying job and I knew this girl who also worked there. She texted me multiple times and it was kind of weird. She seemed a little bit like a slut but I'm not one to judge. I was 100% not interested in her but she kept texting. It never went anywhere just so you guys know.\n\nHowever, my friend went out on a date tonight and I found out that it's the same girl! I know if she ever hangs out with our \"friend group\" she will recognize me and it will be weird. Should I tell him that the girl tried to hit on me? Do I sweep it under the carpet and not tell him? I personally don't think it's a big deal but it could get weird if they become more serious. I want the best for my friend and I don't want him to have his heart broken by a girl who is a slut and doesn't want the best for him", "summary": "My friend is talking to a girl who might be sketch and hit on me. I want the best for him so should I warn him even though he is super into her?"}
{"id": "t3_vtyc4", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Playing tug-of-war with kids over stuff they're not supposed to be playing with... what do?", "post": "I don't have a ton of experience babysitting, but I'm about to become an au pair and I want to work out a couple kinks.\n\nHow do you deal with kids who won't give you something they're not supposed to have when you ask for it? For example, I'm babysitting my little cousins tonight and I had to yank the remote control out of a 20-month-old's hands. I asked her for the remote (her brother was watching the TV or I wouldn't have cared) and tried to take it from her gently, but I ended up having to yank it away from her with more force than I would have liked to use with someone so little. The resulting tantrum was epic. I didn't like grabbing something from her somewhat harshly and was wondering if there's a better way to go about getting them to drop something they won't return. Or am I just being a sissy?\n\nThanks!", "summary": "How do you get a little kid to drop/ give back something they're not supposed to play with without yanking it out of their hands?"}
{"id": "t3_1l7ijx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (M/23) have serious troubles (on my part) communicating and relating to my mother.", "post": "I have never really been able to talk to my mom easily. My parents divorced when I was about 3, and I have always been a bit of a troublesome and angry kid (and now adult). She is way more extroverted than I am and talks far more than I do. She has always been understanding, helpful, and supportive of whatever I do (despite being quite controlling of my life), but for some fucked up reason I resent her. Whenever her and I are alone I feel agitated, frustrated, and annoyed, so I just can't have a proper conversation without getting sarcastic and snippy, and shooting down what she says.\n\nI honestly have no idea what is wrong with me, and it has been eating me up for my whole life and I don't know how to fix it. It feels like there is a mental block in my mind that prevents me from having a positive relationship with her, and I feel like I need some sort of therapy to fix it. She has been nothing but tolerant of me my entire life, despite me being a shithead most of the time.\n\nThe thing is I want to be able to relate to her, and I know that's all she wants, but my mind will absolutely not let me do it. Whenever I'm by myself I hate myself for being such a bad son. Has anybody had any experience with this, or have any advice about it? Thanks.\n\nI'm fully aware of how much of a bad son this makes me, but I can't change it.", "summary": "Something about me makes me unable to communicate with my mom in a nice and constructive manner, and I don't know how to fix it."}
{"id": "t3_2wwkj4", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by falling asleep in my bros bed", "post": "Alright, so this happened two days ago, on saturday afternoon. To set the scene, I go to a pretty large school in the south and the weekends pretty consist of drinking a lot and socializing. I got to the house where a few of my bros live at around 4 and to kill the time we decided to through a movie on and chill until it was time to start drinking and go out. HBO recently started carrying Bulletproof Monk so we throw that on. Turns out its fucking awful. I end up falling asleep on the end of his bed laying ~~horizontally~~ like a dog.\n\n     Falling asleep was the beginning of my fuck up. I briefly remember a nightmare of being chased by some hellacious creature, I turn back to look at it while running, but cannot find it. I look forward. BANG I hit something.\n\n     So I come to stumbling up the stairs of my bud's house with a massive headache, not knowing what the fuck has happened to me. I  rub my head (much to my chagrin it feels like its been beaten worse Denver in the super bowl last year) and find my hand covered in blood. I basically fall into the living room where all my friends are drinking and ask what the hell is going on and what happened. I simply can't talk and am concussed as fuck. I walk into the bathroom to find a major gash at the top of my head and blood all down my face. The next thirty minutes is comprised of me being in complete shock, not knowing where I am, and wondering what happened to me. I finally gather myself and start cutting up with my friends. This is when the guy who's room I fell asleep in walks through the front door holding a golf club... Not pointing fingers, but seriously, i'm suspicious now. \n\n**TIFU** by falling asleep on a bed doggy style, having my best friend hit me in the head with his golf club and being majorly concussed.", "summary": "Fell asleep on the end of a bed, had a nightmare, probably rolled off the bed, split my head open, and got a major concussion."}
{"id": "t3_10mqgj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'[M21] worried and she's [19] confused", "post": "Me and my girlfriend have been going together for a little over one month and things have begun to get a little hot and heavy. Passionate make out sessions, heavy petting, etc. Now as things got pretty intense I see the definite signs of arousal, erect nipples, heavy breathing, dilated pupils, and she seems to be getting a little wet under her jeans.\n\n We break from anything more serious because time has become a factor but we just talk about what we enjoyed i learn some things about what turned her on but then she drops that she has considered herself asexual, but based on what both of us have seen that night she's in an interesting place.\n\nTo me she was clearly aroused and might have proceeded further, and she's not too sure what happened either as it's not how things usually are for her. I'm giving her time to think about everything and don't plan on pressuring her one way or another. I care about her enough to be fine with her if she feels like having sex with me or not. I just want other peoples input to assuage my worries, I'm just a worrying person.", "summary": "My girlfriend considers herself asexual but seems to be sexually attracted to me and really doesn't understand. I'm just looking for what others think about it."}
{"id": "t3_3yt5jt", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Can we have a \"Post Your Dress\" thread?", "post": "Hello /r/weddingplanning!\n\nI am very new to this sub and I am obsessed! I'm not engaged yet myself but SO and I have talked a lot about it and it is in our near future for sure :) ANYWAYS. I'm specifically fascinated by all the wedding dress photos that people have been posting. One thing that I find myself constantly wondering as someone who will be shopping for one is 'WOW, how much does that beautiful thing cost??' **So I'm wondering if y'all would be ever so kind as to post photos of you wearing your dress as well as including the following info: dress name, cost, place of purchase, size?, and any other info you'd like to include regarding the dress.** I think this will be great to see all the posts in one place (and feed my new wedding planning obsession) :)\n\nI realize that there are already subs dedicated to wedding dresses but they are so small. So I'm posting here in the hopes that we can get many people posting their dresses and then we can all gush over them in one place. \n\nAnd a side note on future individual dress posts:\nIs anyone interested in making a 'requirement' that dress posts include 'stats' in the post title? Similar to how /r/progresspics requires body stats so we understand the context. This would include things that I mentioned above like dress name, price, place of purchase, etc. Can even include dress size for more context (unless poster is uncomfortable sharing that info). What do you think?", "summary": "Post your a photo of you wearing your dress and include info: dress name, price, place of purchase, and any other info. "}
{"id": "t3_hq11r", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why don't self posts get karma?", "post": "I understand that they used to and that people [complained] because there were lots of \"vote up if\" type posts that were getting karma. Removing karma from them, however, does not appear to have changed things. They've always been reported and deleted (none are on in the pages [archived by archive.org] for the time before it was removed). They still show up from time to time (despite it actually saying right above where I'm typing this \"*Beginning your title with \"vote up if\" is violation of intergalactic law.*\"), then they get reported and removed.\n\nHowever, one effect that this has influenced is the creation of rage comics and an increase in screenshots. I've even noticed that increase just over the last year. Now, I'm not saying that they wouldn't happen if self posts got karma, nor that they are always inappropriate, but it is evident that there are some things that would be better as self posts that are instead posted as screen shots or rage comics and it's hard to not think that the lack of karma for self posts plays a part in this.\n\nSo, I think we should revisit this decision. It seems to me that self posts add original content to reddit and should be encouraged. This very, and very popular, subreddit is a perfect example. It accepts nothing *but* self posts. [IAmA] is another perfect example of a popular subreddit that is affected by this that is also quite popular. So, is there any reason we shouldn't start letting self posts get karma? If there is not, what kind of karma would be the most appropriate for them?", "summary": "Removing karma from self posts doesn't seem to have had the intended effect and may have caused other problems, why not give it back?"}
{"id": "t3_46z3fw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By not checking the showtimes online", "post": "Little backstory: I live in Malaysia, work in Brunei (Google it if you don't know where these countries are)\n\nSo I watched Deadpool last week during the holidays with my friends and it was freaking awesome. Now that my holiday is over and I'm back at my work place, I've decided to watch it again with my colleagues.\n\nI was hyping them up with all the fun Deadpool facts on the way to the cinema and they were super excited to watch it. Until we reach the cinema and noticed there were no showing of Deadpool. A quick Google revealed that it is banned in Brunei. Now I got 5 angry co -workers blaming me for getting them all excited for nothing.", "summary": "didn't know Deadpool was banned, hyped up 5 co - workers for the movie and they are about to un-alive me"}
{"id": "t3_njcdl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend has never instigated sex.  Not once.   Advice from women pleeeasseee.", "post": "I am 21 and she is 20, we have been dating for about 19months.  \n\nThis being said, we are a very sexually active couple, being a 21-year old male, I have the sex-drive of a 21-year old male.   Because of this I know she is completely comfortable with sex, never once has she denied it and she is always into it, but not even once in almost *two years* has she instigated it.  I have brought it up to her so many times and everytime she just says sorry, but then it's instantly forgotten about and *nothing* changes.\n\nI can't figure out what to do because theres clearly not much I can do to fix it if telling her about how much it bothers me has never changed anything in the long course of time that she has known its bothered me.\n\nIf you are wondering why it bothers me it is quite simple: I see sex, when in a relationship, as a very important thing and as the most explicit way to show someone you care about them if you're willing to let them see you completely naked and you will please them.  Therefore I get greatly bothered by her never putting even an ounce of effort in to starting it off, not even making out.  I have *every single time* for almost 2 years.\n\nAny advice would be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "After almost two years of a sexually active relationship, girlfriend has not once instigated the sex, not even made out, I have had to start it *every single time*."}
{"id": "t3_3vymlo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] with my girlfriend [24F] for ten years broke-up six months ago; now I feel angry to myself and can't talk to people", "post": "Hi.\n\nWhen I was in fifth grade, at 2005, a beautiful girl asked me to be her friend; and we were together until six months ago, that's around 9-10 years. I can't remember the times I wasn't with her. I don't have a memory which doesn't include her.\n\nI was never comfortable around people, and only with her I was relaxed, I could talk comfortably only with her, and we always said that we won't leave each ever. I was very happy.\n\nAnd things start to get bad. I couldn't met her expectations. She got depressed, and I couldn't help her; I couldn't find correct words to say to her, and I couldn't make her happy. After the treatment for her depression, she (correctly) left me, and blocked me everywhere except one messaging service.\n\nAfter that, I was just making myself believe that she'll be back, we'll be together and happy again. But she clearly isn't. Recently she told me that she's with someone else, he loves her very much etc. \n\nAnd there's me now. My only memories are with her, I don't talk with anyone except my coworkers. I don't feel *anything* since she left me, I'm not sad, I just don't want anything. I have a job and working for M.S degree, and I just *continue* them, without doing anything for my life. Every day I think about her for a few minutes, and I just feel angry, I don't know why.\n\nShe isn't returning, she made it pretty clear. But it left me in a pretty bad situation, without anyone to help. This is the first time I'm saying these.\n\nActually I don't know what I'm trying to achieve with this post. Maybe writing about it helps.\n\nHave a nice day everyone.", "summary": "I was in a relationship for all my life, she dumped me, and I don't know what do to know."}
{"id": "t3_3qhhhk", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by having my friend change one word in a document", "post": "So since it's hack your school network week I figured I'd make my first post this. This happened last year and there is a little backstory . My school has a gaming club and they download computer games (illegally) and put them on a folder in the commons folder on our schools network. So any ways me and my friend would always go to his moms room (she is a computer teacher and has a bunch of computers and let's us on our phones and shit). We on occasion would play games from the gaming club folder  until one day all the games were deleted because they were pirated but they left a note saying why they were deleted. Here is the FU.anybody is able to edit the document so I tell my friend \"hey you should change one word.\"(badass right). He agreed to do it and changed. 2 days later the gaming club lady is at his moms room pissed off. When he changed the word it apparently said he created the document. Anyways she had our IT guys inspect every computer to see what actually happens and then proceeds to tell us \"this is what happens to my gaming club when kids decide to hack the school server\". needless my friends mom was really pissed when we told her what actually happens", "summary": "I tell my friend to change one word in a document, gets accused of hacking and gets his computer privalages banned until IT searches every computer he uses."}
{"id": "t3_nzaae", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redditors, have you ever thought of a genius invention on your own, that later in life you found out made someone else rich?", "post": "Hi reddit, I'm 19 and I currently go to Virginia Tech University in the U.S. Ever since I was little i would always come up with inventions in my mind that I didn't have the ability to make myself and would never share for no particular reason with people that could. One that I remember, that recently I found out had been invented was a machine that would tell people how many parking spaces were available and where those parking spaces were in a parking garage. I'd always hate going to the mall with my family and being stuck searching floor after floor of the garage for a spot, and thought that what if someone could create a small sensor like an invisible laser that you could install over every parking space to signal whether a car was under it or not, if the space was free it would light up and direct cars to it. This was 5 or 6 years ago when I was in middle school. The first time i saw one of those boards that tell you if a garage was full I thought to myself, wow that could've been my idea that got me rich, if only I capatilized on the thought. Yesterday as I was parking my car I noticed green lights over spaces that were free and red lights over spaces that weren't...someone had invented what I thought of years ago and put it into reality. Of course someone else deserves the money for the hard work, it just sucks to think that could've been me. Any of you have any similar stories to share?", "summary": "I came up with an idea to speed up finding spaces in parking garages years ago, never did anything about it and someone else invented it recently. Any of you have similar stories?"}
{"id": "t3_vx4lp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend and her ex.", "post": "Hi,\nThrowaway account. I'm M/22. I was with my girlfriend for about a year then we split because she went travelling. We are now back together and met up overseas and travelled for a few weeks then she has a few weeks travelling by herself before she returns home.\n\nI have noticed she keeps in touch with her ex-boyfriends, one in particular, who she has told me a bit about but overall been very closed about it. She is going to his country visit. All she has told me is that she is staying with a \"friend\" there who she met when she lived there. I'm about 90% sure it's him.\n\nMy issue is not that I mind her seeing an ex boyfriend, it's that she is not open about it and still doesn't tell me when I ask her who she is staying with. \n\nWhat is the best way to bring up the fact that this makes me uncomfortable? I am going to try to address this on skype.\nI've tried not to blather on too much but ask if I have forgotten any important details.", "summary": "I think my girlfriend is going to be staying with her ex-boyfriend in another country. How do I tell her I'm not comfortable with this?"}
{"id": "t3_2b2chw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "3 weeks later, my boss still hasn't given me a contract to sign. WTF should I do?", "post": "This is a post that first started here:\n\nI like my new job, it's with a respected firm led by a well-regarded local professor . . . but it's been three weeks and I still don't have a hiring contract to sign. I'm not sure what to do. He asked for all other hiring documentation (I9s, proof of insurance, voided check, etc.) but hasn't gotten a proper hiring contract for me to sign. He's been \"editing it\" since last week. I wrote to him in an informal email that the end of the week (today) is my personal deadline to complete paperwork, and it's almost 11 (Half day) and I don't have anything. I'm confused and hurt - this is not how you treat people, especially build trust with new employees. He's really well-respected, and this could be a lucrative post-graduate career should I stay, but how can I (and him) respect myself if I do without a contract for much longer? \n\nI plan to send an email saying that I've enjoyed the work thus far and am available next week as planned pending the receipt of a contract to sign, etc. Is this too demanding for a newbie? Am I a pushover? \nWTF do I do and still hold my head high, here at work and in general?\nAlso, if I send that email, will it fuck up our relationship as mentor-mentee?", "summary": "New job, great job . . except no real hiring process! I'm \"on the team,\" but boss is slow with paperwork. Should I stay?"}
{"id": "t3_2x8mv5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I respond to people I work with asking how old I am? (26f)", "post": "I started college when I was 17 and knew what I wanted to do right off the bat, so at this point I've been in my field for nearly a decade (I had a job in college in my field). I also got married at 19 and had my first child at 20, and I'm very good at my job (I'm a graphic designer/marketer) so I am in a position in life that is usually normal for someone about five or more years older than I am.\n\nI feel capable at my job and in my element running meetings with men twice my age, but every once in awhile someone I work with in some capacity will ask me how old I am. Frankly, I don't want to tell people, I'd rather it be ambiguous. I've noticed a marked difference in the way people respond to me once they have confirmed that yes, I'm younger than they think I am and don't just have a fantastic skin care regimen. How do I respond? Do I lie? Do I just live with it? Is there any professional way at all to respond to that question without saying 'none of your business'?", "summary": "nosy people want to know how old I am, how do I tell them they're not supposed to ask people that."}
{"id": "t3_1plmc5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "ELI5 Why is it some people get assignment done in no time and others take forever?", "post": "I always considered myself pretty average when it comes to assignment (you know like 5 page long essays) I really never had any motivation, but I can tell you for sure, and this holds true even at university: It takes me 1h per page, search / planning included. \n\nIf I have a 5 page essay, it will take me 5 to 7h (depending if I take breaks)\n\nToday, I did 3 assignments of 4 pages in 14hours, two of which I had to research sources. \n\nI really don't mean to brag and this kind of \"ability?\" always made my work feel worthless, as I feel like I'm putting no effort in it.\n\nWhen speaking to classmates, they planned 3 days for 1 of the assignment, now I do proclaim the same thing to my family, but truth is the 3 days would be spent playing video games and what not, and the actual work will pretty much always be done day before due.", "summary": "Is it just me being somehow \"talented\" (I doubt it) or is there some kind of trick my subconscious mind plays to keep me from failing my assignments? "}
{"id": "t3_hskpa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I met my soul mate and was so in awe with him.. until I found out he dropped out of community college and has been a full-time cashier ever since. I'm a doctor who makes six digits.", "post": "We talked for hours and shared our interests, many of which we share. I became so infatuated with everything about him.. he is literally a male version of me. Then I found out he dropped out of community college and has been working as a cashier at a convenience store ever since.\n\nReddit, is it wrong that I suddenly became unattracted to him? Comparably, I have a high-paying job and I feel like taking this relationship any further, and even possibly to marriage, just couldn't work out. I feel *terrible* but does anyone understand my situation that can offer advice on what I should do? Am I wrong to think about it from a logical point of view, rather than a \"this could be my soul mate\" point?", "summary": "I really love everything about him, except his career/income. I make 6 times more than he does. Would you give all of this for true love?"}
{"id": "t3_22xqj7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M 18] just found a girl [F 18] whom I've only met a few times on FB recently-after two years of not talking.", "post": "So the first time I met this girl about 2 years go at church- I felt an instant connection with her. I finally found her on Facebook and we've been talking. She's ok with hanging out-and I dont think I'm in the friend-zone because she's so open to go out. But she just posted a relationship update to make it \"Facebook\" official. What would be a good plan? We're getting together in a little over a month to shop around at a record store, a hippie shop, etc. I just feel like even though I don't know her that well it was like a spiritual and emotional connection. But she's in a relationship which I assume is serious. Should I assert my feelings for her when we meet up? I'm not sure what to do-in my mind she's life partner/wife material because she seems perfect for me. At this point in y life I really don't want a girlfriend or children but she makes me think otherwise.", "summary": "Girl feels like soulmate, in a relationship-meeting up soon to hang out for a whole day. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_17w8he", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, who is the most important person in your life, and why?", "post": "Mine is simple, my kids. I will always remember the one day my daughter made me feel like the best dad in the world. I sometimes have to go back to work late at night to attend meetings (I work for a place with offices around the world) and one day I was home before my family was done with school. I decided to make some dinner and leave it for them and while I was making it I spotted some cookie dough in the fridge. I thought it would be nice to leave them cookies. So when my wife picks the kids up from daycare she said my daughter seemed to have a rough day (as rough as a 5 year old can have, I guess) and was very grumpy/sad. When they got home my son smelled the curry I had made and got very excited and then my daughter found the cookies. I had left a little note saying to enjoy the cookies and sorry for having to work late. My daughter started to cry and said she was so happy. My wife took a short video and sent it to me at work. I have never felt more needed and counted upon, then that. I know that these kids will cause me all kinds of worry throughout our lives, but I wouldn't trade that feeling of unconditional love for anything.", "summary": "My kids think I am awesome cause I can make curry and cookies, and they are the best thing that ever happened to me."}
{"id": "t3_xssj5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My disabled little sister is getting bullied. What advice can I give her?", "post": "My little sister is 14 years old and has cerebral palsy. She is functionally fine except for her legs. She's been in a wheel chair most of her life but can walk, albeit not very far, with a frame. My mum is quite overprotective of her and she doesn't go out of the house except for school and the times I take her to the movies or whatnot. \n\nHer only real friend is a kid named Jordan who she only knows because he is the kid of one of my mums friends. He's a few years younger than her and they don't go to the same school.\n\nI live with my girlfriend and don't see my sister as much as I once did but when I went to visit last weekend she told me she was getting bullied at school. Apparently a lot of the kids have taken to calling her a lesbian and this is upsetting her quite a bit. I asked my mum about it and she said it's been going on for awhile and she's spoken to her teachers about it. But this doesn't seem to have done anything.\n\nWe didn't actually discuss whether she was a lesbian or not, apart from the fact that that is just not a conversation I want to have with ANY person that is 11 years my junior, especially not my baby sister it's just not something that really concerns either of us. We've talked about being gay in the past, as our next door neighbors are a gay couple that come over just about every other day, and she is very much of the opinion that it just doesn't matter who you love, as long you're happy.\n\nThere wasn't really a lot of advice I could give her outside of \"aim for the throat\". I too was bullied at school and eventually it stopped because I started to pummel the people doing it, but as you can imagine that's not really something I can tell my sister to do, even if she was actually capable of doing it.\n\nSo basically has anyone got any advice I can give to her?", "summary": "14 year old sister, in wheel chair, called lesbian at school, knows there's nothing wrong with that, more the fact she's getting bullied."}
{"id": "t3_tj2pz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Whats your best \"control your fucking kid\" moment you have ever seen? Here's mine..", "post": "So the people across the street from me have ended up adopting about 5 kids. The youngest one (about 5) constantly runs all around the neighborhood annoying the shit out of everyone. Her parents are never home and she is allowed to do basically what ever she wants (I'm pretty sure she has some metal issues as well). So about an hour ago I hear some sirens and I look out the window to see an ambulance in front of the house down the street. I go outside and stand on the driveway to get a better view and what do I see? The little brat of a kid is running around the EMTs and actually trying to go into the house where they are working. While all of this is happening her parents and older siblings are no where to be found. I really wish they would just move already...", "summary": "Little kid is allowed to run around the neighborhood, gets in EMTs way while they are presumably trying to save someones life."}
{"id": "t3_dwuhh", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Any got a snappy, subtle comeback for a juvenile and jealous fellow suitor? (in text?)", "post": "So this girl I know was in a picture with me in one of those poses, you know, where one of you is holding the camera at arms length? It got posted on facebook, real cute. Anyway, another guy we both know who is younger than us by 4 years has a massive crush on her. He spends way more time with her than I do, because I work a lot, and it's pretty obvious to everyone.\n\nThing is, though, this girl is real flirty to other guys, particularly me, partly because I'm the next-most present person, but also because I'm just swell. He doesn't like it. And as the immature bozo he is, he takes potshots at me occasionally (in words of course) especially when the flirting is afoot. Now, I'm not one to bother getting into it with him (he's like 6'5'') because that will surely get me nowhere.\n\nThat was my position on it UNTIL he commented on the photo. In it, we happen to be dressed as avatars for a halloween party, and it just so happens that I have reddish long hair so I just braided it rather than get a black wig. I commented in the pic that I look crazy. Well this wise guy, who was also at the party as an avatar painted blue, decides to comment on it with, \"you're covered in blue makeup and have your hair braided like a kindergarten school girl... I think your crazy is more internal than aesthetic.\"\n\nWTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  If I thought he was a friendly dude I'd laugh it off, agree and all. But no. Now it's posted on facebook for the internets to see it. LAME NO THX. So I feel the need to post a snappy but subtle comeback. AND YOU CAN HELP!", "summary": "i'm in a pic with a girl on facebook, jealous guy is jealous, posts snide comment. Help me reply with wit and subtle jabbery!"}
{"id": "t3_3p7ucm", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by having a shitty morning and going to McDonald's", "post": "About two days ago actually I had a really shitty morning.\n\nFirstly my alarm does not go off. So I didn't have breakfast. Rush to the train station and I miss my train by 15 seconds.\n\nSo, minding my own business as I finally make it to my campus I decide to hit up McDonald's (their hash browns are really nice in Australia).\nSo as I'm walking down campus to get breakfast I hear a whirling sound. Wheels. Roller blades?\n\nI turn my head around and for about half a second I spot a little girl maybe 4 or 5 years old on a scooter. Then suddenly everything stops and I hear a sickening bang. I didn't feel anything so I thought I imagined it but sure enough she had fallen over, her little razor scooter tipped over with her.\n\nI freak out and ask her if she's okay, if she's bleeding, if her parents are nearby. On the inside I was swearing like a sailor.\n\nLuckily her dad was not too far behind, along with the girl's little sister. She wasn't hurt, there was no bleeding and by the end of it they're all consoling me instead.", "summary": "I thought I nearly killed someone because I was walking along minding my own business before they collided with me. Don't go to McDonalds for breakfast."}
{"id": "t3_2ltkud", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[28/F] Trying to be classy. And date several guys at once.", "post": "I recently got out of a long term relationship and am sick of being a serial monogamist. My goal for right now is to go out on actual dates (dinner, drinks, coffee) with different men, and go out on several dates and get to know them as people, and then selectively get physical with them if it feels right. Its working pretty well: I've made it clear to them that I am in no way ready for a commitment and they've each acknowledged that.\n\nExcept I finally slept with one. And he's very into me. And texts me all the time. I hate texting in general and frequently don't return texts.  (I have told him that I suck at texting but still texts me all the time). Now I'm feeling like I'm going to break his heart, even though expectations were on the table. \n\nDo I (1) need an attitude adjustment because I've been clear about my expectations with each person or (2) am I playing with fire and potentially being irresponsible by engaging with people in a romantic context and then only responding to their texts/calls when it suits me? (I'm also a genuinely busy person).\n\nI am open to general advice as well on actual dating and balancing sex and communication. (The only person I know who went on a lot of actual dates is my very old/old fashioned grandmother, and she definitely could not relate to a Tinder world.)", "summary": "I need tips on how to classy date, communicate with several different men in a limited amount of my time, and not break hearts. Oh, and potentially sleep with several men at a time while maintaining my dignity."}
{"id": "t3_21e1dy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[31 F] with friend [24 F] want her happy but don't want to lead her on", "post": "We've seen each other around, but only recently are we friends.  Yes, there's attraction there (she's lesbian, I'm non-cis). \nI'm in a long term committed relationship (friend is aware).\nShe's in a 2 yr committed relationship.\nHer girlfriend treats her poorly. She's aware of it.  She's unhappy.\n\nI'm a supportive person, and even the most basic nice things you say to friends (you look nice! thanks for the delicious dinner! It's cool you like \"x\") is shocking to her. \n\nI want her to find someone who treats her right.  Treats her how she deserves.  It's too early for me to butt in specifically. But I want to drop hints that she deserves better, without implying that I am that something better.\n\nWhat makes it so difficult is that if I had met her earlier in my life this wouldn't even be a debate.\n\nAny Ideas?", "summary": "How do I tell the most amazing girl that she deserves better than current gf, without implying I'm that something better (because I can't be, not because I don't want to be)?"}
{"id": "t3_s3ufg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just noticed I don't have full access to my boyfriend's facebook profile. Should I be concerned?", "post": "I'm pretty sure this is a stupid thing to be concerned about in the grand scheme of things, but I could use some input.\n\nI was looking for one of his friends who got married recently (couldn't remember her amended last name, but I knew they were facebook friends) so I went to his profile to check his friends and locate her. But I could only see our mutual friends. And I thought it was weird. And then I noticed that his profile was pretty much the only one where I could not see a complete friends list, so I'm thinking he's got privacy filters set. \n\nNow, I KNOW he updates his filters regularly (a long while back we were having some relationship issues, and I was blocked from seeing most of his profile for a brief period of time), and he has coworkers on his friends list and screens his posts from some of them. \n\nThe thing is, I don't think I'm an overly clingy girlfriend (and he has said numerous times that I'm not). I don't try to control every aspect of his life. So I'm not sure why I no longer have full access. \n\nI'm concerned because he's had a habit in the past of poor communication (which he has attempted to work on). But he does tend to close off, and if he DID have something he wanted to keep from me, this seems like one of the ways he might attempt to do so.\n\nIs it acceptable to ask if it was just an oversight or if it was intentional? Is there a good WAY to ask? Is it possible/likely that it is just a mistake? Or is it possible he has something to hide? I'm not going to fly off the handle; it's just that his track record has been such that this could be nothing, or it could be SUPER HUGE, and I won't know until it's too late.", "summary": "Can't see my boyfriend's full facebook profile for no good goddamn reason; should I be concerned/call him on it?"}
{"id": "t3_2ze5q0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by taking my ex out for dinner", "post": "Ok. So like many posts this FU was not today, but back in December. \n\nBACKSTORY: I had dated this girl freshman year of Highschool. Things were good, but I broke up with her out of peer pressure. I was a self conscious Freshman with little self esteem. I regretted it for years, and the fact we ended up being FWB a couple times did not help. \n\nSo we both get through our first semester of college, myself at a school in Tx, her in Ok. Didn't see each other often, but we did snapchat back and forth once and a while. Well over break she says she is tired of being single, her ex was shitty, blah blah blah. I offer to take her out.\n\nWe both dress up, and I took her to this little seafood restaurant, and go see a movie after. The movie I wanted to see so that wasn't really a problem. But I paid for all of it. Every dime.\n\nThroughout the course of the evening all the repressed feelings I had resurfaced, we kissed, it was a bomb time. \n\nAt the end she asks me to drive her to her ex's place. Are you kidding me?!? Which then she calls me right after break to tell me she's dating him again. \n\nSo cool, now I have this slight feeling of desire, mixed with the burning hatred from being screwed.", "summary": "took an ex out to dinner, brought up old feelings, got played, now I want to hate her with the fire of 1000 burning suns but still can't completely despise her."}
{"id": "t3_1xpd3f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17 M] just read a comment that makes me feel quite hopeless.. /r/relationships, is it true that it's always the same experience you have with someone you like?", "post": ">Those who have dated a lot (and the people who made Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind) will tell you that you end up desiring the same type of person over and over again. It's the same restaurants, the same conversations, the same jokes, the same view of familiar places, the same stories of your childhood told to a slightly different person with slightly different looks and habits. A slightly obscure author said, \"I like young girls. Their stories are shorter.\"\n\nIs this true? Because it makes me lose all hope of ever having a meaningful relationship with anyone if all I'm ever gonna find in someone else is just some lesser version of [this](\n\nHell, I got depressed watching Her because the main character seemed to be doing and saying things almost exactly the same as I did. So if she (a girl I liked ) is all that  I'm gonna see in someone else, then what's the point in any of this?", "summary": "In your experience, does it always feel the same when you like someone, as in do you act the same way? Say the same things?"}
{"id": "t3_2gh4mj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my [26 F]. Chemistry/kissing problem. Is it just not meant to be ?", "post": "A girl that I've known for a few years and I began hooking up recently. I'm extremely attracted to her; we have tons in common and just generally get on great and have become very close. However, the kissing is just..awkward. \n\nWe both have different styles and both want to seem to lead. We acknowledged it and tried to work on it. I kissed her my way and she tried to follow suit but we just weren't synching up and couldn't get into a rhythm. She got paranoid then and wouldn't kiss me the way she usually goes about it.\n\nShe's pretty much conceded that it's a deal breaker and that we just don't have sexual chemistry. I'm not so sure. Yes, it was awkward but I wanted to work on it and hopefully we'd eventually get there, and I was still turned on during it.\n\nEverything else is perfect apart from this one thing.  I really thought I might have something with this girl.  It's something that's never ever happened either of us before.. kissing just comes naturally right? Or at least you usually adjust to what's happening. Maybe we put too much pressure on fixing it?\n\nJust wondering what peoples thoughts are on this? Are people sometimes just meant to be very good friends? Is it a sign of no sexual chemistry?", "summary": "hooking up with a girl I really like and she likes me, kisses just arent synching/awkward. Is it a sign that we're just not compatible or can it be fixed ?"}
{"id": "t3_29hvmz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my [25F] together 5 months and she has issues over FB photos and posts from past relationship.", "post": "So this girl and I have been in a pretty serious relationship for the past 5ish months. She is a little older and has a 5 year old girl from a past relationship that I have just fallen in love with. I have always wanted kids and this has given me a taste of what it is like to be a Daddy.\n\nWe both love each other very much and the kid and I both love each other as well. I have taken the little girl fishing, to the zoo, on walks with the dog, etc.\n\nMy SO and I have lived together about two months and it has been a little rocky because of our situation but in terms of the relationship between us it has been great.\n\nWe met each other in detox and I went to rehab for a few months. We talked while I was there and when I got home we got together.\n\nNot too long after we started getting serious and I started getting involved with the kid she started asking a lot of questions about my ex because of things she saw on Facebook. She believes that my ex is still in love with me and that since we were together so long and still has a lot of pictures up of us together, of which I was also guilty. She asked about a couple casual conversations that my ex and I had in the last few months and I told her honestly that it was just casual conversation.\n\nShe seems to think the contrary and believes that it is only a matter of time before we end up getting back together. I tell her there is no way in hell I would do that regardless of being in a relationship or not but she is persistent.\n\nShe is so afraid I am going to break her and her daughter's hearts.\n\nI don't know what else to say to her at this point. I deleted all our photos, unfriended her, told her to please take hers down.\n\nThis has not done anything to persuade my SO otherwise.\n\nI just want a little perspective on what this is all about or what the next possible moves on my part could be.\n\nI really love this woman and her little girl and I dont want to lose them.", "summary": "SO is paranoid that I will break her and her daughter's hearts because of old photos and minimal to no contact with ex."}
{"id": "t3_lyl7v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Small community org trying to get teens involved. ideas?", "post": "so this is a little bit of the old \"le sigh, how do we get teens to care\" and part of it--well, no that's most of it.\n\nI work for a small community organization in Brooklyn, NY and my job is to try to get high school kids involved in our programs and the community (and programs involving them being involved in the community)\n\naside from making our posters say \"come to our super cool program\" and making the background a cat, what else can we do that kids could get interested in? I don't just want programs they come to (yes, those too), but I want them to feel empowered and I want it to be more than JUST because of marketing--though I'm happy to take marketing ideas as well, I'd love getting more people to know that we're doing super cool things    \n\nthe community is famously homogeneous but I'd like to avoid pandering to stereotypes ideally I'd like to get the entire community involved in something environmental and local (growing cucumbers for pickling for example), helping clean a local place of worship...  \n\nI'm sure others have had lots of experience with things that have worked (or maybe could/could've worked).  \nwhat have you got?", "summary": "? How do I go beyond giving high school kids something to do for an evening and move them towards giving them *something to do*?"}
{"id": "t3_3llhf7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [43 M] with my new partner [37F] 3 weeks duration, first time trying to be intimate I had a failure to launch due to psychological block.", "post": "So here is my issue. First some background, I am fairly recently divorced (1 year) coming out of a really bad marriage of 15 years. It was a bad breakup with lots of bitterness on both sides, add to that 2 kids who I now don't get to see as often as I would like. I went from that right into a horrible abusive relationship with a much younger woman (24 F) who essentially saw I was incredibly vulnerable and used me for financial gain while filling my head with how I was a really terrible person which is why I ended up divorced and that she didn't know why she stayed with me. The end result was any self esteem I had was ruined but I somehow got addicted to her. \n\nI finally left that relationship 3 months ago after I just couldn't take it anymore. I really worked to try and improve myself and have lost a bunch of weight and my general outlook on life has improved. I met a really nice woman a couple of weeks ago and we clicked. I really like her, she likes me and hey things seem to be looking up. \n\nSo the problem, we decided to become intimate and things seemed to be going good but I couldn't get hard. I was into it, wanted it but it just wasn't happening. First time ever for me that this occurred. I have no problem getting an erection if I masturbate so it's not physical but psychological. I still have in my head the crap my ex gf used to tell me plus I guess lingering guilt over my divorce. So how do I overcome this, because I really want to develop this into a healthy relationship.", "summary": "History of bad/ abusive relationships, met nice new woman experienced failure to launch due to psychological block first time we tried to get intimate."}
{"id": "t3_gl4cv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Current bf of 4 months wants to go on vacation without me and the thought of it is eating at me", "post": "I'm a 17 year old female and he is a 21 year old male. We've been dating for about 4 months and we're madly in love with each other. He's never had a gf before me and i even took his virginity. We've never been apart for more than a day and when he mentioned the idea of him going to Austin, it kinda crushed me. I'm always telling him that he should hang out with his friends and i'm always supportive of whatever it is that he's doing so of course i acted like it was no big deal and i told him that i'm really excited for him and that he should definitely go. He could hear it in my voice that i was upset but i kept on denying it. \n\nHE'S ONLY GONNA BE GONE FOR 1 WEEKEND. Like i feel so dumb that i can't even handle 2-3 days without him. I feel so clingy and desperate. I trust him 100% but i DON'T trust the people that he's going with. One of the people going is his friend that i do not like at all. He's EXTREMELY rude to me almost every time he's comes over and he's rude to my sister and he's even a dick to my bf. He's vulgar and he's constantly getting sloppy drunk, and starting fights. He's a fucking cokehead for God's sake. \nAnd another person that's going is this girl that, for some reason, i have myself convinced she likes my bf. She's really flirty towards him and has pet names for him and everything. I don't trust her or anyone for that matter. \n\nI know all of them are just gonna be rude to him and take advantage of him while they're there but he doesn't see that. Ugh i feel so retarded.\n\nTell me i'm over reacting", "summary": "bf wants to go on vacation with people i don't trust without me and i've never been without him for more than a day"}
{"id": "t3_16j75y", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Should I encourage my boyfriend to exercise and eat better or is this his own issue to deal with?", "post": "When I met my boyfriend almost two years ago, he was fit and in shape. We used to run together and go hiking all the time. He was stressed out for awhile and drank a lot, and six months ago he had to move away for a different job. His new location doesn't have nice places to exercise outdoors, and he hates exercising indoors. He has gained about 30lbs since I met him and I know it affects his self-esteem. He recently found out that he is \"overweight\" and he constantly calls himself fat. I tell him that I love him and that if he is unhappy with his body image, he should exercise. But, he always makes excuses. I wonder if I should encourage him more. Is this a good idea or should I let him deal with this issue on his own. I don't want him to take my encouragement as \"I love you less because you're overweight.\" That's not the case. However, I do worry that if he continues to gain weight he could suffer health consequences since his family members have Type II Diabetes. I also just want him to feel better about himself. Any suggestions?", "summary": "Boyfriend complains that he's fat but won't do anything to get back to his healthy weight. Should I encourage him or let him deal with this alone?"}
{"id": "t3_3fp4fz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "It pains me (22F) to see an ex (22M) of 3 years, in a relationship with someone else. How do I move forward?", "post": "As mentioned in the title, I'm having trouble moving on from someone I dated 3 years ago. It's been a while, I'm in a good relationship now, yet one part or me can't shake this feeling of \"what could have been?\" With said ex. When I see him with someone else (online/school (we go to the same school)), I can't help but feel loss. \n\nI know my ex isn't right for me. I know I don't want him. Yet for some reason, I'm having trouble letting go of the last few feelings for him.\n\nFellow redditors and relationship gurus, can you give me any advice so I can help myself finally move forward and fully appreciate future relationships?", "summary": "still wonder what could have been with ex of 3 years. I know he isn't right for me but I'm having trouble fully moving on from him. Advice appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_2v0mg7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Just broke up with my [20F] boyfriend [21M] of 2 years for what I think was a good reason, I feel so horrible and empty.", "post": "My boyfriend,  well I guess ex bf and I dated for a bit over 2 years, during which we lived together. We were not perfect and had many problems but were committed to working it out. We did argue frequently but both knew that we loved each other. I don't know how it happened but over time, my romantic attraction towards him decreased to the point that it's pretty much non existent. \n\nHe's my best friend. I love talking to him and being around him, but when it comes to sex or intimacy I just can't do it. I thought long and hard and chose to end the relationship half out of respect for him. I feel everyone deserves to be in a relationship where both parties want each other equally. I can't offer him that and want him to be happy in his future . As well although I know he was never mad about it. I was also feeling increasingly guilty over the lack of sex in our relationship because of me. \n\nTo me these are all logical points ( correct me if I'm wrong),  but my emotions are getting the best of me. I wish I could change the way I feel. Now I just have this horrible void in me. He was such a big part of my life and I'm just hoping I made the right choice.. Please give advice/opinions, he's saying I just didn't try hard enough. I just want to lay in bed forever. .", "summary": "Broke up with bf of 2yrs due to a lack of intimate interest , trying to decide if I made the right choice ."}
{"id": "t3_1beto7", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I fixed something! One stupid little thing that I broke to begin with is now working again.", "post": "As the new admin of IT at my library, I inspire confidence in all the employees just by being here while they work on their computers. When anything electronic needs any kind of maintenance, repair, instillation, etc. *I ride down from Mt. Olympus and activate my powers of computing to quicken all the digital world.*\n\nThe only problem is that **I am shit with computers.** I have no idea how I got this job because most of you reading this probably know better how to use them than I do. I broke explorer by trying to install an update. *I'm that bad at it.* \n\nBut I fumble through this and everyone cheers! \"Great job, Crazybay. You are vital to our staff, CrazyBay.\" \"Do you want another raise? No? How about we just buy you subway once a week, put you on salary, and pay your cell phone and internet bills?\"\n\nI recently screwed up one of my bosses computers pretty bad (it may have not actually been my fault but probably was). After a full weekend of stress and reading dozens of pages of stuff on support.microsoft.com, I not only unbroke it, but I also installed the ghetto new circulation system on her office computer!!\n\nThis shouldn't matter as much as it does to me but now I feel just the slightest bit validated in receiving the beef-up paycheck that came with the job.", "summary": "I got an IT job (that I am severely underqualified for) and I am delighting in my small victories of repair and maintenance success!"}
{"id": "t3_1pprvu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [44 F] with my friend [44 F] 32 years, I lied to her 25 years ago and having anxiety about it now.", "post": "She and I have been best friends since we were children and have been through a ton of shit together and are still best friends to this day. \n\nShe liked a guy when we were 19 years old and they had slept together a couple of times.  He didn't want a relationship but she did, so she ended it but still had feelings for him.\n\nI do not remember the time in between but he came on to me and I slept with him.  She had moved away by this time. Word traveled fast and she found out and confronted me on the phone.  She asked if it was just once and I said yes.  She asked if I was drunk and I said yes.  Both are not true.  It was twice and I wasn't drunk.  No excuses.  I broke the girl code.  I was so afraid of losing her that I thought this way she would know kind of what happened and I had a better chance of retaining the friendship.  I am honest when I say there was no maliciousness involved in not telling her.  Truth is, I was and may still be a coward. Come to find out years later I trickle truthed her. \n\nI have generalized anxiety.  For whatever reason lately, this incident is first and foremost in my head when the anxiety hits.  I keep thinking I should tell her but it may just be to assuage my own guilt and a way to reduce the emotional pain.  I have spoken to my psychologist about this and he said that it was so long ago and she knows the act that happened that there is no need to hurt her again unnecessarily.  He seems to think that my anxiety is looking for an outlet and has latched on to this event.  I honestly hadn't thought of the event in years.  So much has happened in both our lives (marriages, children, etc) that it seems like ancient history. I don't know what to do and would appreciate some outside perspective.  Thank you.", "summary": "Broke the girl code 25 years ago and lied about it.  Anxiety is shining a spot light on it and I'm not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4dut5w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my boyfriend [21 M] and our 1 year anniversary fiasco", "post": "To keep things short and sweet, we live about 2 hours from each other and today was our 1 year anniversary. I took off as did he and I made the trip last night to go visit him so we could celebrate our 1 year together. Today however, we did nothing but look for clothes for his new job as a server.\n\nWe woke up early and tried to make things snappy, as 4PM rolls around we're finally wrapping things up but we're both frustrated because we wanted to have a day together to do 1 year anniversary things (go to museums, get food, go see a movie). Due to it being such an ordeal going from shop to shop, mall to mall that by the end of it we didn't have time to do any of it because everything would be closed after we battled through city 5o'clock traffic. He had a melt-down because I wanted to go back home and sleep in my own bed because I was exhausted and I didn't see a point in staying if he had to work at 7AM the next day.\n\nMy question to you, reddit; Am I totally out of line for being upset that he didn't really take care of his commitments before hand or am I just a needy little bitch? Please help me understand his side because I so badly want to get over this but I just cant understand his train of thought when I stopped my multiple projects a day early so I could come on Wednesday night and not Thursday morning.", "summary": "On our 1 year anniversary, we shopped all day for clothes for his new job. Am I a baby back bitch for being upset?"}
{"id": "t3_13q7tp", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "18 year old guy, first relationship. Please help.", "post": "We split up in the middle of the summer because she was leaving for the semester, and she wasn't into me anymore (or so she claimed). We got back together at the end of the summer temporarily when our families stayed at the same hotel for a week during vacation.\n\nShe left for the semester, started hooking up with a douche who eventually cheated on her and got expelled. I made a terrible decision and hooked up with one of her friends and had a brief fling with another one. I was incredibly depressed and looking for someone to cling to for support. She had a brief fling with another guy and is currently pursuing a third. We talk a lot over email and chat, although it's mostly me who initiates contact. Towards the beginning of the semester I asked several times if she wanted to get back together and she said it was too early to tell. The last time, I pressed her for an answer (was a month or two ago), and she rejected me pretty brutally.\n\nShe came back for thanksgiving break and didn't particularly want to see me, although she wasn't totally opposed to it. She went to a random party and hooked up with several guys but apparently they weren't particularly desirable. She posted a bunch of shit on her tumblr about lost love and missing someone. She could mean me, or could mean the guy she's currently pursuing. I have no idea. She posted a picture with the caption: \"You used to be alright. What happened?\" and said \"[name], lovie, this is for you.\"\n\nThose are the facts and I have no idea what to make of them. I think she still has feelings for me, but is also angry/disgusted with my hooking up with her friends. I've apologized and explained myself to her, and I don't know how best to help the situation now.\n\nI would really like to get back with her when she gets back, but I don't know if that's possible or how best to go about doing that. My idea was to give her some space for a month (aka no contact) and seeing how she feels when she gets back. Am I an idiot? What should I be doing? I have no idea what to do. Please please help.", "summary": "my girlfriend and I broke up for the semester, I got with 2 of her friends briefly (huge mistake), but she may still have feelings for me. Is it even possible to salvage something?"}
{"id": "t3_1xlbk0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17f] cannot figure if crush [19m] is interested in me or just bored. How can I ask?", "post": "So I've been chatting on fb almost weekly for substantial periods of time (20 min - 1 hr) with a boy who graduated from my school last year for almost a year now and I can't tell if he actually enjoys our conversations or feels obligated to respond and wishes I would leave him alone. I've been able to see him in person a couple of times since he left for college (once when I visited his city and asked and once when he came back and said he'd try to see me, which he did.) over Christmas break I tried to see him and he was busy (legitimately so, I believe, but there was no mention of trying another time) and when I messaged him he took much longer than usual to reply so I decided not to try contacting him in case he was trying to get rid of me (I almost always start the conversation.) A little over two weeks later, he messaged me and we talked for about an hour. I messaged him about a week after to say our school had posted a baby photo of him (he's the son of two teachers, that's why it was posted) and we talked for a while. There wasn't a clear ending to the conversation as we seemed to miss when the other was online but we were having a good conversation when he just stopped responding. It's been three days and he hasn't even read the message. \n\nI can't figure out what's going on here. Does he actually want to be friends or does he just like talking to me when he's bored or am\nI the annoying girl who can't take a hint? Can I ask about it? I'm worried to say anything because it'll probably come off as needy (and maybe it is) and I'll look extremely insecure but at the same time I'm tired of constantly wondering about this. I hate that I get worked up waiting for him to reply and I'd just like to know what he's thinking so I know if it's even worth it to continue making an effort to be friends. \n\nWhat should I do? Is there any eloquent way to approach this or should I just let it be?", "summary": "I want to know where I stand with a guy but his spotty replies are making it really difficult to find out. Do I ask?"}
{"id": "t3_1d8rmc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "F/20 Should I be worried about our future together?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for six months and we're planning on living together this coming fall. He and I won't see each other during the summer months since we'll be in different states working, and we'll move in together right when he gets back. I am one hundred percent ready to make this leap with him, but what makes me hesitate is that he recently told me that his love for me comes and goes in waves, and that he feels more fulfilled when he is alone because he is more productive. This brought on the topic that he thinks that living together like this will either solidify our relationship or end it. I think it's a bit strange to bring this up while still planning on moving in together... Our relationship has been a bit rocky because of the lack of productivity together. When we're together, we just want to BE together: not be bothered by friends, school, etc. Just be in each others company. This has made both of our grades suffer, and friendships. Which has soured the relationship. We both said that when we look back on our history together, it's been great but not as great as it could be because of how little we have actually done. I am just worried that this isn't the right step to take in our relationship if he feels so rocky about it, and if our relationship is based off of a history of non-productivity. \nHave any of you been in this situation? And what did you do to fix it? Or can it be fixed?", "summary": "In relationship that is leveling up: moving in. Boyfriend mentions love has wavered. Have problems with being productive together, want to fix it before the inevitable.  Advice!"}
{"id": "t3_y1vip", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21m/22f] Dating for 18 months, no plans for the future...?", "post": "Hi /relationships, this is my first post. I read the rules, but please let me know if I missed anything :)\n\nSo I've been dating this wonderful girl for about a year and a half now. She absolutely adores me, would do anything for me, and I would do the same for her. We're both college grads and live near each other in a bigger city. \n\nBut as much as I enjoy our relationship and feel devoted to her, when I look to future I can't see us together. Whenever I think about moving in together, or even getting engaged, I get a sinking feeling in my stomach. I can't picture marrying her. I can't picture marrying anyone right now.\n\nI think what we have is just a \"comfortable\" relationship. But when do I need to either commit to the next step or break it off? She was looking at apartments online the other day and started using words like \"we\" when describing moving into them. We had a talk about how I wasn't ready for anything a few months ago and she seemed to be on the same page, but lately she's been hinting at the long-term kind of things, and says her family is asking her about me and our plans as well.", "summary": "happy with my girl for 18 months, not ready to move further. Do I keep going at this level or break it off?"}
{"id": "t3_3nuf9x", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by calling out a line cutter", "post": "I was at a grocery store last night, picking some stuff up for a date, and I got in line at the express counter, but a man came over and stood in front of me. At first I thought I'd let it go, but then decided to say something, so I said something alone the lines of \"hey, um, sorry, I don't mean to be rude, but I was standing right there when you came over and got in line . . .\"\n\nAnd he let me go in front of him, at first apologizing but then said \"it's not a big deal, you don't have to have a cow about it.\"\n\nFirst of all, WTF is this, 1998? Second, I wasn't having a cow, I was trying to be as polite as possible in letting him know he'd cut me in line. So now I am a little agitated, and said \"well you don't just cut people in line!\" and we got into an argument about whether he knew what he was doing. He said \"fuuuuck yoouuu\" and I said \"fuck you too,\" and he flew off the handle, started calling me a bitch over and over as I was paying for my stuff. It was really, really terrible and I was badly shaken by the end of it.\n\nI know I wasn't nice, it was a bad idea to engage after he made that \"have a cow\" comment, should've given him the benefit of the doubt when he said he didn't see me, and I really didn't need to return the f-bomb he hurled at me. Should've just let it go.", "summary": "told a guy he cut me in line, got in an argument, things got ugly and he swore at me and called me a bitch repeatedly."}
{"id": "t3_1fqll0", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I[m19] want to know best way to not get boring to a girl [f22] who I kinda have a thing with", "post": "So im starting to get to know this girl[f22] better and I[m19] want to make sure I dont get boring, it has happened to me before.  We just spent 2 weeks together at a spring class thing that was in the mountains.  There was about 10 of us that built a pretty tight nit group but me and her hit it off real well.\n\nSince we were with each other basically 24/7 for two weeks, we didnt have to text to talk(could just talk in person) or have to plan to hangout, it just happened but now that were back home I want the \"thing\" to go somewhere but im afraid I will get boring.\n\nWhat do you all think i should do to not get boring and to get this to go somewhere.  Oh and one more thing, she does have a slight concern that where to far apart in age but she doesn't consider is a huge deal and she seems to be interested in taking it further as well.", "summary": "spent 2 weeks basically with girl 24/7 during a off campus college class, theres a spark but I dont want to get boring and her to lose interest...suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_331opp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [18M] is very angry at me [18F] because I don't like jewelry.", "post": "We have been together over two years, but got in a very large fight today. We have large fights occasionally where my boyfriend just gets blinded by his anger. \n\nI have never ever liked jewelry, and haven't worn a single item of jewelry since elementary school, my ears aren't even pierced. Even with this fact, my boyfriend continues to buy me jewelry.\n\nI haven't been rude about it up until this point, because you shouldn't ever really refuse a gift. But I do make a point to him that I don't like jewelry, and never wear it, while trying to be as polite as possible. For some reason, he can't understand this about me and continues to get angry that he buys me jewelry I don't wear, etc. etc. He just seems to not understand I don't want this type of typically \"nice\" gift. I still thank him for the original intent, but at what point should he start treating me as a person with individual likes and dislikes? He just expects me to like typical \"girl\"  things. He's very upset with me and calling me ungrateful. Sigh. Maybe he's right. It's just something I will never be able to like but am expected to be grateful for anyway :/ \n\nAlso, I would understand if we just started dating, but it's been two and a half years of this. I don't want to lie to him about my interests though.\n\nHe is also trying to break up with me right now....but he does that every time he gets angry.", "summary": "Boyfriend, after 2.5 years....still can't accept that I do not like jewelry at all. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_1dxn8p", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "F[19] Met a very nice guy, but he is leaving very soon!", "post": "Basically, I've recently met this very nice boy that I instantaneously fell head over heals for. He's very sweet and I feel that he is perfect match for me and he feels the same! We've only known each other for a month and we are both 19.\n\nUnfortunately... we're both young and in college and he is moving back in with his parents for the entire summer, starting on the 21st or so. So we'll be roughly 4 hours apart for around 4 months.\n\nMy question is, what should I do now? At this point I feel like I'm falling harder and harder for him, but I'm afraid that I'll be really sad and lonely when he leaves. Should I stop seeing him until he gets back? Or should we keep in touch? Help me not be irrational, because if he asked me to be in a long distance relationship with him, I might consider it.", "summary": "Falling for a guy who is leaving far out of town for 4 months. Unsure of what I should do about it!"}
{"id": "t3_3ealg7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] with my boyfriend [19 M] of 2 months and am having second thoughts about it", "post": "I've been dating my boyfriend for two months now. We started dating a month after we started talking, and at the beginning it was rough because it was summer after college and we were both home, not being able to see each other for a few months. After coming back for school (a few weeks now), I realized that being together isn't all that great. I feel like we having nothing to talk about, differences in humor, he's prone to \"teasing me\" (makes jokes about acne, weight, etc.) that became increasingly irritating. I don't actually feel like I like him emotionally, but since I've never been in a relationship before, I can't tell if this is just me being too picky and having high expectations. Should I break it off, or is 2 months of dating too short to really know if I \"like\" someone? I mean, when we're being nice and actually talking and laughing, I feel great, but other time, I have to constantly ask myself if I'm actually enjoying the relationship or just wasting my time.", "summary": "Dating for two months, not sure if I like the guy. Too early to tell, or should I break it off?"}
{"id": "t3_4rij3l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I 29F am feeling very insecure about my 32M boyfriend 3 years because he had cheated on me in the past. I need some tips and advice.", "post": "Parker and I have been together for 3 years. Very very early on he cheated, and we went to couples counseling because he was very determined to make me feel important and make the relationship work. It ended up helping a lot and we have a good relationship.\n\nBut there is that just nag in the back of my head that I am so insecure. I am open with him about being insecure at time but he just says I need to not worry about things, and that he has done what he can to help me with my insecurity but he doesn't know what else to do and it is up to me to get over my insecurites. Which I get that, he said it from a place of love and I wasn't upset.\n\nEvery relationship I have ever been in I have been cheated on. Which sucks, and it sucks that it happened with Parker but I am just a little screwed up from being cheated on so much.\n\nI want this to work with Parker, and I trust him but sometimes I just feel so insecure. Last night a pretty girl at the bar we were at who he is friends with came up and started talking to him and it was harmless and whatever but on the inside I just felt so insecure.\n\nI have a great career and a good life and yada yada. I just don't even know what to do. I know I will kill the relationship if I continue on like this. \n\nHelp :(", "summary": "Insecure, and have been cheated on in every relationship I have ever been in. Need some advice to get over my severe insecurities before I ruin my current relationship."}
{"id": "t3_2t9tzk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] have been with my girlfriend [19 F] for 2 years. She just told me that she was not a virgin the first time we had sex a year ago. Am I crazy for feeling betrayed and wanting to end the relationship?", "post": "To preface, I was really open about sex in the beginning of the relationship. I told her that while I do not mind if she had done it with anybody before, she should let me know as I had never done it with anyone before her. I also made it very clear that I wanted to give up my first time with somebody special, and a year into the relationship, I decided she was the one. I had 3 fairly serious girlfriends before her, but I never got to the point where I wanted them to be my first. \n\nI honestly feel a little sick looking back on our relationship now. She would joke about how she took my v card and how I took hers. She always said how she was happy I was her first. I feel really betrayed that she could lie to me so easily for so long in the relationship. I believe this is the end of the relationship. \n\nAm I crazy for feeling so betrayed? I'm talking to my girlfriend tomorrow to likely end the relationship.", "summary": "Girlfriend lied to me constantly that I was her first. I want to end our relationship because of her ability to lie straight to my face."}
{"id": "t3_2fytrr", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying a social experiment", "post": "to start off and give context I work got a seasonal job at a big amusement park chain of which I wont name for privacy purposes. as an employee we get free tickets and passes. one of the rules that come along with them are that we are only allowed to give them away and not sell them. well on Facebook i tried to see how many people who i don't regularly talk to would suddenly want to be my best friend when i offered to sell these passes at a discount rate. after a few hours of it being up and getting the results i was expecting i deleted the post. \n\ntoday i was called into the security office of my job and they interviewed me in a small room for about a 1/2 hour before telling me that i was suspended and would be under investigation. kept my cool because i did nothing wrong and never actually sold them but still it means less hours this week and a smaller pay check", "summary": "pretended as if i was going to sell free shit given to me from work and got suspended from work while they try to find a reason to fire me."}
{"id": "t3_rirfd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is hypnosis as  learning possible?", "post": "I've happened to see/read a lot about hypnotists being able to \"instruct\" people to do things while in some form of a hypnotic state (like the classic sleeper agent spy who will perform an act when his hypnotic state is activated). There have been plenty of movies and entertainment TV shows that showcase this, including one I saw a while back that purported to show that it was possible and effected. There's also the use of hypnosis as for drug/alcohol/mental status therapy that has plenty of anecdotal evidence to support this.\n\nHowever my question revolves around whether students could be hypnotized and taught material as is in a normal class and usefully retain that information when not in a hypnotic state? I'm a college student and (no surprise here) the idea occurred to me while cramming for an exam.", "summary": "1) What's the scientific evidence surrounding hypnosis, if any? And 2) Can hypnosis be used to effectively \"instruct\" people in complicated subjects for use while not in a hypnotic state?"}
{"id": "t3_1gfwsm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[20M] and my girlfriend [21F] of 9 months tells me she does not want me in her life seemingly out of the blue.", "post": "A little background.  We have been dating for almost 9 months and have had ups and downs with stresses of attending school and both doing hard science majors.  \n\nBasically she claims that I only do nice things for her when something is going wrong and that when she does nice things (like a small note) I don't say anything.  We have had arguments of this before and it had seemingly been resolved.\n\nNow that it is the summer and she is back home with her family about 5 hours away from me.  I visited about 3 weeks ago and we had an amazing time.  We both wish we could have spent the whole summer together.  \n\nLast week she was agitated with her family, specifically her dad and brothers and I had spent a lot of time talking to her about her frustration.  She said she did not feel like she was loved enough.  So for the last week or so I have been trying to do nice things for her here and there because of this (like sending a handwritten card, and flowers).  As this has been happening she seems to be getting more distant with me.  I try and get at what is really bothering her and she is does not give me a straightforward answer. \n\nThen last night she just goes off on me late at night.  Saying I am not good enough for her and that I am a self centered a-hole.  Telling me to f off and she doesn't need me.  Just continues to say all of these extremely hurtful things to me.  I didn't try and reason with her much, just told her that whether you ever believe me or not I care for you deeply (and things along those lines).\n\nIt seems like she is taking all of her anger out on me from other things going on in her life and I do not understand how to respond.  Should I try and talk to her or just leave her alone for while?  I am at a loss of what to do because it seems like it is coming out of nowhere.", "summary": "All of a sudden my girlfriend who is normally a very loving person says she does want me in her life and that I am a self centered person because of previous events."}
{"id": "t3_3x9w36", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by studying for finals", "post": "This happened yesterday, after a 6 long day marathon of studying for three finals that are right after each other, I was ready to begin my winter break. I called up my uncle to pick me up and two hours later he finally showed. He asked me to drive since I know my way around my campus more so I did. Little did I know, 12 cans of Monster, 4 hours of sleep and the adrenaline pumping through my veins because of the excitement of winter break would impair my driving skills. As I pulled out of the parking space, I drove directly into a cement pillar causing $3000 worth of damage to the front of my car. I didn't even get out of fucking parking garage. I had to use my shoe strings to keep the bumper from falling off and hitting the front wheel. On the bright side, I got high marks this quarter.", "summary": "I studied too much for finals, drank too much caffeine and didn't have enough sleep causing me to ram a cement pillar in a parking garage."}
{"id": "t3_3qyf5l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25F] wasn't invited to birthday gathering of 5 months [25M]", "post": "Hi, my feelings are a little hurt and I think this is a sign I should end this situation with a guy I'm seeing but I need some help in organizing my thoughts.\n\nI seen this guy about 1-3 times a week for the past 5 months and we communicate every single day. Last week I started getting weird vibes from him (he doesn't cuddle with me as much and looks at his phone more). After I left his apartment, he hasn't tried to initiate any conversation for about 5 days. His birthday was coming up and he was inviting his friends to hang out (both female and male) and did not invite me. I messaged him the day of his birthday  to congratulate and asked if he was doing anything. He explained again he's going to hang out with his friends, but made no mentioning that he wanted me there. He also later in the night hung out with coworkers as well to celebrate.\n\nIn the past I've planned things for us and asked myself to hang out with him but generally if he's already out with people and I ask to join,  he has a reason I shouldn't be there. He takes a lot of initiate so I think he just didn't want me there at his birthday.\n\nI feel like if I express my feelings I will seem needy. He's not my boyfriend. I feel like I don't seem important enough in his life to want me there to celebrate for him.\n\nI would like to continue to be his friend, but how do I express that I get the sense he doesn't like me as much anymore and it's better to end it now and the lack of invitation was a sign he didn't want me there?", "summary": "guy of 5 months didn't invite me to meet him and his friends on his birthday. What's the best way of ending this?"}
{"id": "t3_155a00", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Getting mixed signals from a girl I'm interested in [21/m][25/f]", "post": "I went out to a bar last night with a coworker, her boyfriend, and her cousin. The night started off okay, me and the cousin where chatting and getting along pretty well. Then her 'ex' (they talked for a while but he told her he wasn't looking for anything serious) showed up and they spent a while talking to each other. He eventually left and I ignored her for a while (I mean c'mon she shunned me for an ex). Next thing I know she grabs my hand and we are alone outside the bar making out (I assumed it was a \"I hate me ex I'll just make out with you\" type thing, but she is cute and I had a few drinks in me so I went with it).\n\nAfter the kissing ended I mentioned her ex and she apologized profusely and said she had no idea he was going to be there and she just isn't sure how to act around him yet. She said it's totally over between them. We talk about how we both are looking for a real relationship and we are definitely interested in getting to know each other more. We exchange numbers and make plans to see each other today, but nothing was set in concrete. My coworker asks me today what I thought of her, I said she's pretty cool and ask if she said anything about me, apparently \"i'm a good kisser\". \n\nSo I call her this afternoon and ask about a time to hang out, she says she is going to lunch with a friend and will get in touch afterwards and let me know a good time (I was at work till later the evening anyway). She then texts me a few hours later saying she forgot she had plans with a friend and she is free tomorrow if we want to get together then. Now I have become pretty jaded with dating and the opposite sex in general, so I immediately doubted her \"prior plans\". Not too mention I'm not the most confident person in the world so I immediately assume that she's blowing me off. \n\nAm I over thinking things? Do I have legitimate concerns? I'm definitely interested in this girl and I want things to work, but I don't want to waste my time either.", "summary": "Met a girl, watched her talk to her ex, we kissed, exchanged numbers, made plans, she forgot about prior plans with a friend. Does this seem odd? I'm f'in confused."}
{"id": "t3_4kafwy", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I (24, female) found out that my boyfriend (23, male) responded to a male seeking male casual encounters ad on Craigslist while out of town. Advice needed!", "post": "Background info: He and I have been dating for a little over 6 months. Basically fell head over heels, and moved in quickly together. We had plans to move to a new city in August where I will be starting my first year in law school. We have an apartment reserved and everything is taken care of. I have never had any suspicions and he treats me better than anyone I've ever been with. He makes me feel beautiful and worthy of companionship. \n\nA couple of weeks ago he was sent out of state on a short 5 day business trip. He works for a retail company and was helping to set up a new store. \n\nSince his return, he's just been a little off. I felt horrible (and still do) but I did something shitty and went through his phone. \n\nFound out he had responded to a man looking for man casual encounters ad on craigslist. His email sounded very comfortable, as he knew the acronyms and typical format. He sent it the day he got out of town. The man responded 3 days later, to which my boyfriend offered to host. There is no other communication that I could find.\n\nWhen I confronted him, he said that he has no idea why he even responded to the ad. He said he didn't want to actually meet up, but had the urge to talk to someone online only. He claims that what I have read is the only communication he had and that he has never physically cheated on me. He also said that this is the only instance where he was interested in talking to a man sexually. \n\nI have no idea what to do. I love and care about him deeply and I have never connected so easily with anyone. I do not know what to believe and whether what he is saying is bullshit.", "summary": "Caught boyfriend responding to ad for sex with a man while away on business. I am happy for the first time and have no idea whether to work through this or walk way"}
{"id": "t3_1xgsti", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My boyfriend M(22), and I F(21) have been dating for 3.5 years but I suffer from an anxiety disorder and this has given him severe performance anxiety. How can we stop the positive feedback loop?", "post": "I suffer from an anxiety disorder, which has recently gotten much worse with both of our college graduations coming up, my classes being very work heavy and fear that I might be doing poorly at work. Because of this, I burst into tears when he is unable to become erect (which used to only happen rarely when he was too tired but now it happens every time). He told me he becomes incredibly anxious when we are about to become intimate because he really wants to perform well and he really really does not want to make me cry but this makes it impossible for him to become erect, then I cry... \n\nYes, I have really tried very hard to be supportive and pretend like it doesn't bother me but that is really difficult (and frankly, I am a terrible liar). Especially when he can hear me sobbing in the other room afterwards. I cannot stop it from happening! I try to hide the crying from him but I know he knows, and that makes him anxious which makes him unable to perform next time.\n\nHow can we stop this positive feedback loop and have stress free, enjoyable sex again?", "summary": "Positive feedback loop of performance anxiety mixed with my own anxiety when he is unable to perform. We would like to be able to have stress free sex again."}
{"id": "t3_vykp7", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "22 and whining about parents... (ranting ahead)", "post": "I spent four years living half a country away from my parents, and those four years were great, but expensive. So when my parents moved closer to me, I moved in with them, looking to save money and finish school. \n\nIt's been going pretty well. I go to church with them once a week (they're fundamentalist Christians), I don't drink or go to parties and I work to pay for school. They cover my room and board, and occasionally drive me around. \n\nLast week however, I had a friend come up from Toronto, (about an hour and a half away.) I went to a movie with said friend (Magic Mike) and told my parents I was going to see Abe Lincoln. Ignoring the fact that it's not as terrible as it sounds, that I'm 22 and lying to my parents, my mother somehow found out. \n\nNow she's all cold and \"I'm too angry, we'll talk about it later\" and I want to be like \"no! We're not going to talk about it later. We're not going to talk about it ever, because it's none of your business.\" I appreciate what they've done for me, and they've been a huge help, especially in the last few months, but sometimes I want to tell them that parts of my life have nothing to do with them. \n\nI'm tired of not dating because they won't approve of the guys I date and sick of listening to her every single week, \"will you be in heaven with us?\"", "summary": "my parents are being weirdly controlling about movies I see after I stopped drinking, dating and dancing when I moved in with them."}
{"id": "t3_1cdysu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's your, \"Everything happens for a reason\" story?", "post": "My story:\n\nI was not the most hardworking kid in highschool and therefore found it extremely difficult to find scholarships or grant money for when i actually started going to college.\n\nIn November 2011, I moved in with my grandparents. Almost immediately, i got a job in order to pay for my college expenses. At the time my grandparents were having an incredibly hard time supporting themselves, let alone me. I had been basically fiscally abandoned by my parents with little to no money, to my name. Anyways my grandparents were beginning to think about filing for bankruptcy. My grandfather was on his way home from work one day early in October (2012), fell asleep at the wheel and was killed in the resulting car crash. His life insurance settlement paid off for nearly 500k. My grandfather whom i loved with all my heart, wanted nothing more than to see me get a college education. Now just shortly after 7 months later, I'm graduating with my associate's degree with a 4.0. Hopefully in another few years, i'll be on my way to being a surgeon, and making enough money to take care of my grandmother, who has helped take care of me.", "summary": "No money for college. Grandfather dies in an accident. Resulting life insurance policy takes care of my college expenses. Everything happens for a reason."}
{"id": "t3_i7fa0", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Is the extra attention you're getting actually slowing down your progress?", "post": "Hi all! I'm 25/m 5'8\", been dieting and exercising for about 12 weeks now. Dropped about 20 pounds, starting at 240 and currently standing at 218 this morning. When I started, I stayed away from a lot of social gatherings and just focused on my program. Well honestly I was just a bit self-conscious about how much I gained. I also have a skin condition on my face that causes rashes to break out a lot. Anyway, I skipped out on a lot of birthdays, graduations, etc. Around week 8 I felt confident enough to start going out again, the diet has pretty much eased the rashes on my face and I'm more clear than I have been in awhile. My friends noticed my weight loss immediately. These days I'm starting to attend more gatherings and kind of regretting it, haha. I find it hard to stay away from all the drinks and snacks that come along with it. From starting at a pace of 2-5 pounds lost every week, I haven't lost any weight in the past 2 weeks. Thankfully I haven't gained.", "summary": "Now that I'm more socially active, I'm finding that I cheat my diet a lot more than when I started. Anyone else struggling with this?"}
{"id": "t3_13y89l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I get a solid response from a girl I've asked out 3 times and gotten an iffy response in return, but I KNOW is interested in me?", "post": "I met this girl on Okcupid. We hit it off and after a few messages I asked her out to dinner in which she replied \"I'm really busy for the next couple weeks, but I'll see what I can do\". I figure she's letting me down nicely and never expect to hear from her again.\n\nFour days later she messages me back with her number! Word. We text back and forth a few times over the next few days and I ask her out one more time and I get the same sort of response. However, I figure she's being honest because she not only gave me her number in the first place, but has talked about sex, that she wanted to teach me how to dance, and all this other stuff that proved she was really interested. If anything, the fact she keeps responding to me, someone she's never even met, tells me she's being honest.\n\nSo after this, I go on vacation to Florida where I am currently (it's been almost two weeks). I asked her if she was busy next week again, but made a rookie mistake, gave her another thread at the same time, and she latched onto that instead of the real inquiry I was interested in. Oh well. A few days later (about 3 or 4 days ago) I ask her again and she replies \"I'll see what I can do :)\".\n\nSo here I am today. I get back on Friday. I've been talking to this girl somewhat for roughly 3 weeks. What do I say to get her to commit to a date on Saturday? If she gives me another iffy response should I keep trying MORE? I mean as long as she's responding, she's clearly interested right? I just don't want to come off as pathetic seeing as this is like the 4th time I've asked her out.", "summary": "How do I word asking a girl out who's given me an iffy response 3 times, but I KNOW is interested?"}
{"id": "t3_2ismfp", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By Texting My Sister.", "post": "This happened last Friday night, but the consequences didn't fall upon my person until today.\n\nBit of a back story for relevance - I am temporarily living with my Mother again and she stared dating this guy, we'll call him \"Stew\". Stew is a major doucher and uses her, then makes her feel like shit, when I come home from work I have to deal with it. They've been on and off dating for 5 months now.\n\nSo last Friday night Stew and my Mother have another falling out, where my Mother comes home all upset because he is being a major asshole again. After she settles down and goes to bed, I text my sister about it. I wax poetic of how much of a prick Stew is and how I am tired of having to run damage control.\n\nJust as I send it, I realize that instead of starting a new conversation with my sister, I actually responded to an old group text my Mother sent to me, my sister and... Stew.\n\nThe next day when I come home from work my Mother says she was pretty pissed at me, at first, but then realized I was right and told Stew this was wake up call for both of them. From the way she put it, it was implied everything was fine and they even made plans to go out of town next weekend.\n\nSo today I come home from work and my Mother is in tears, informing me Stew just broke up with her, and he used my text message as an excuse. She then goes on to tell me she'd rather be treated like shit then be alone.\n\nNow my whole family hates me.", "summary": "I sent a bitchy text about my Mother's asshole boyfriend... To my Mother and her boyfriend and broke them up. Now my family hates me."}
{"id": "t3_rn7xh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What to consider when preparing a roadtrip from SoCal to NorCal?", "post": "My spring break started yesterday and I am planning to go from Southern California to Northern California stopping at various universities along the way.  I'm coming from Los Angeles and will be stopping at UC Santa Barbara, UC Berkeley, and finally stopping at UC Davis.  I am planning on going the entire week so I will seperate out the car trips, so it would be 4 hours each trip to each location.\n\nI have taken into consideration food and gas fees.  Was wondering if I would need to know the location of hospitals and emergency rooms just in case.\n\nThis is my first time planning such a trip and I will be going alone.  I also need help convincing my parents to let me do this.  What should I tell them?  I am 19 and consider myself responsible.  They used to be very leniant but have recently cut back due to increasing stories of teenagers getting in car accidents in my area.", "summary": "Planning socal to norcal trip, what do I need to consider?  How do I convince parents to let me go.  I am 19 years old."}
{"id": "t3_2c7dlw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by texting my mom a pornhub video link", "post": "Alright, so I couple days ago i was browsing the hubs, if you know what I mean, on my phone. To be honest, I was in the mood for a quick boosh before I hopped in the shower. I was looking for videos to go along with my boosh and I noticed the video would not play. I copied the video link to try it in a few different browsers.\n\nFast forward to today, My dad and I have been looking for a car to purchase. We both went to look at one today and both my mom and aunt wanted to know what it was like. I texted my aunt first, explaining how it went. This is where the fuck up is. After i sent the message to my aunt, i tried to copy it so i can send it to my mom too since i'm too lazy to type one seperate for her. You can probably guess what went wrong. IT DIDN'T FUCKIN' COPY. I go to my mom and I's text conversation and I paste the pornhub video link (when i thought it would be what i sent to my aunt) and hit send immediately after i paste it. Lo and behold, I send a pornhub link to my mom.\n\nI started to panic, not that i would be embarrassed or anything, but it is my mom i sent it to. That is a little weird. After i sent the link, i simply texted \"Woops, meant to send something else\" and then I pasted what was meant to be sent in the first place. She didn't say anything about the pornhub link, so I think she was completely oblivious to it. I haven't spoken to her in person yet, hopefully i got away with it.", "summary": "I sent a pornhub link to my mom when I meant to send something I sent to my aunt that supposedly \"copied.\" Not."}
{"id": "t3_3jkwvx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF [26 F] wants me [26 M] to back out of lease with my BFF [27 F]", "post": "I've been dating my girlfriend for two and a half years. I've recently had to move because I'm attending a graduate school partly because I wanted to remain close to her. The graduate school I got into was also the same graduate school my best friend who is a girl is also attending. This year I was trying to save money by living with a roommate and I thought my best friend would be great since we have spent alot of time and know each others habits. Originally my girlfriend gave the OK to live with my best friend, but now with two weeks before me and the best friend were supposed to move in we get into a huge argument and she says she doesn't want me to move in with my undergrad best friend. I don't want to back out because I gave my best friend my word and I feel like a jerk backing out in the last minute, but if I do live with her I know my girlfriend is going to resent me for the rest of the year.", "summary": "What should I do if my girlfriend [27 F] doesn't want me to move in with my best friend [26 F] I've already promised to live with?"}
{"id": "t3_4tlhqw", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Credit cards and Credit History. Is it safe to close old accounts?", "post": "Hello!\n\nI hope that someone can lend me some advice for a situation that I find myself in. Here's my situation:\n\nAbout 10 years ago as I was traveling, I applied for my first credit card which was an AMEX delta card. For the years after, I traveled often, and got benefits from this card.\n\nNow, after I have recently graduated college, and landed a full time job, I no longer have time to travel as much, and therefore have no need to use the Delta card. Last year I paid off my balance with the card, and haven't used it since.\n\nRecently, I had to pay the $95 annual fee, and realized that I should perhaps consider another credit card. I thought about closing this account and applying for a cash rewards card.\n\nNow my issue is that this is my ONLY and OLDEST credit card account. I would like to close the account and apply for a Bank of America cash rewards card as my checking/savings accounts are with them. However, I am concerned with how this will affect my credit report.\n\nWill closing this account greatly affect my credit score?\n\nI even spoke with the reps at AMEX about downgrading to a cash rewards card with no annual fee, and apparently I cannot do this as my AMEX card is linked with the Delta account. I do not want this card, I'm stuck in a pickle...\n\nAny advice would be appreciated!", "summary": "I want to close my oldest credit card account for another credit card that offers cash back rewards. Not sure if this will negatively impact my credit score. Is it worth it?"}
{"id": "t3_2i5aro", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Landlord sold property - New landlord trying to increase rent during lease period.", "post": "My fiance signed a lease with three friends last year, that started June 1st, 2014 (through May 31st 2015).  A month before that time, after being diagnosed with cancer, the landlord sold all his properties to a rental company.  The new company stated at that time that they'd honor all the old landlord's leases.\n\nFast forward to today, October 1st.  In this college city, leases that start on June 1st get signed in October for the previous year.  My fiance and her roommates intend on renting the property again (June 1st 2015 through May 31st 2016).  However, the rental company not only wants them to sign the lease for the next year, but sign one of their leases that superseeds the current one.  This wouldn't be a problem, except for the fact that they are also trying to raise the rent on the *current* lease by $30 per month.\n\nMy understanding is that a lease can't be altered by either party unless it is mutually agreed upon.  I don't know if that's the case if the property is sold, however.  Anyone have experience with this?", "summary": "Old landlord sold the property after lease was signed, new owners want to increase the rent on the current lease.  This legal?"}
{"id": "t3_1eoldm", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "\"Getting back out there\" sucks.", "post": "It's been two months since I (29m) broke up with my ex (23f). Since I have done a lot to improve myself. I doubled down on my schooling, lost 27 pounds, and have been doing more things that I enjoy. \n\nThe issue is my breakup was amicable. We were just two people going separate ways. While it was mutually agreed upon the pain has still been pretty raw until recently. I now feel like I am in the position to start dating again! That's a pretty big step for me the only problem is I'm only meeting two types of women. The first group are women who aren't looking for anything at all besides friendship. That I am totally cool with but having the door open for a possible relationship would be nice. The other type is what gets me. The type of woman who wants to be in a relationship NOW, wants kids NOW, and wants it all delivered to her by a charming prince on horseback. The worst part is that this has happened a couple times in the last week and a half! \n\nIt just seems like I can't find a happy middle ground. I really don't want to rush into anything and sitting around talking about some girls' guy troubles gets old quick when you have your own problems.", "summary": "two months past breakup and am ready to date again. All women I meet want to be just friends or want to be married after a week. Thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_4s7fll", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Fiancee [30F] wants an expensive wedding. How can I [30M] talk her down without looking cheap?", "post": "My GF recently became my fiancee.  I am sure she's been planning this day for a while in her head, but the only two details I've heard so far is that it is a \"$60k wedding\" and \"the groom/his family\" pays for it.  For reference, she is not from the U.S. originally (although she became a citizen in her teens), so her culture is weighing in here.  Her culture (middle eastern) is big on over-the-top events and the professional success to back it up.\n\nWe can technically afford this wedding, as between us we make about $300k/year, but I come from a lower middle-class background and spending $60k on a single event just seems preposterous.  It might even cause negative feelings with my family because no one has had a wedding that cost even half that much.\n\nThe problem is that I don't want to just say \"no\" because then I would look cheap.  I believe that she should get the day she wants, but I also think she could have just as great of a wedding on less (maybe $20-30k), so my challenge is to convince her that she could be happy, especially if it means we can keep it from impacting other milestones.  For example, she has already started talking about buying a house in the next 1-2 years.  Well, the average house exceeds $1 million in our area, so an expensive wedding is going to push that timeline back by a year or so if we are to contribute equally to the downpayment. (I'm 100% footing the bill for the wedding, remember).  We also both agree on trying to become financially independent of work as soon as possible, and are in general frugal people.  For example, we live in an old, cheap apartment, and she recently bought a used car.\n\nWhat can I do here?  Advice from people with non-American partners is particularly appreciated", "summary": "Fiancee wants an expensive wedding, possibly for cultural reasons, and I think we can be happy with less.  How to make her believe this?"}
{"id": "t3_22kik2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [35 M] dating [36 F] for several weeks, she said \"I'm too available\"", "post": "I recently started dating this woman, or rather started dating this woman again. I asked her out three years ago and we went on a few dates, and we didn't click. We remained friends, and we recently both found ourselves single. So, she asked me out to rekindle what we had going before. \n\nWhat attracted her to me was how much I had changed. Three years ago I was really immature with no real direction in life. Now, seven months after a devastating break up, I completely turned my life around. I've lost over 50 pounds. I'm exercising, eating clean and all around taking care of myself. Life is going awesome for me now.\n\nSo, she's back in the picture. Things are going really great between us. I'm trying new things with her that I haven't done with other women. I used to be a somewhat cold, cerebral person and not very affectionate. Now, I'm taking chances. I'm not overanalyzing and looking for \"signs\". I got handsy on her on our second date, I took a chance and kissed her. These things would take months in previous relationships. \n\nI've also decided to be more communicative. She likes to text, so I've reciprocated by texting her quite a bit. I've never been really chatty on text, but again, why not, I'm going to text as the mood strikes me, rather than again overanalyzing. We'll probably send each other like ten texts a day, although I find myself texting her more.\n\nShe gave some feedback to me which has got me thinking. She said that I'm too available. I'm not much of a challenge. Now I'm getting back into overanalysis mode. I sense I might be beginning to turn her off. How can I adjust my communication pattern with her to not be so \"available\" and be more \"challenging\"?\n\nI'm a person who goes all out in self-improvement and my work, where my enthusiasm has brought tremendous results, but I'm sensing this might not be the best approach for relationships.", "summary": "I think I might be turning my girl off by being too available, but I don't want to turn her off by being too cold. What's the middle ground here?"}
{"id": "t3_2zxj0l", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I wish I could tell her.", "post": "It's really kind of ridiculous. We'd been friends for so long, and when feelings started developing, I wasn't really surprised. I told her how I felt and she said it was the same for her, so we became a couple and it was really great. She was the first I'd been with that really supported me in my decisions, and I supported her in hers. \n\nWhen she left, it was so sudden I was really taken aback. She only ever said anything doubting us months beforehand, and when I asked to try and talk it out and help her feel better about it, she shrugged it off. I told her I would do anything to help make things the way she wanted them, but she said everything was alright, and for a while it was. \n\nWe still talk sometimes, but god, every time I'm screaming in my head wondering what I did wrong. It's not even that I feel the need to be with her again, because I feel like it's important for us to find out the kind of person we want to be with and she decided I wasn't it. It's rough, but that's her decision. \n\nI just want to know why she chose to end it when it seemed so great. Now we just stay quiet and pretend it never happened, which is the worst part because we used to be so open with each other, well before we ever had any romance. Now that old friendship is gone.", "summary": "Things seemed great, but not the case. She left, and I'm left wondering why. Now, it feels fake to be around her."}
{"id": "t3_fhfaz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I'm think that my friend is taking advantage of my goodwill.", "post": "( *My mom came to me today with this question. I told her reddit might help her out. This is what she typed:* )\n\nI have a friend through theatre, that I help regularly with designing lights, set, and directing for a very small amount of money (stipend).  She is a high school theatre teacher who doesn't know much about technical theatre, so I have helped rescue some of her shows, that were pretty bad.  The principal has even told the teacher how impressed he is with my work (I get program credit for designs).  I love what I do, and I don't mind helping the program and her.  \n\nThe most recent show is a large scale musical, that requires hundreds of hours of research and construction, with lights and set.  **She is asking me for my sketches and other materials to put up in her classroom to \"teach\" her class how it is done.**  She likes to come in to the shop and try to change things.  \n\nFirst of all there is no time, because she waits till the last minute to do everything.  \n\nSecondly, she doesn't know what she's talking about.  \n\nI feel like my methods (along with creativity) of designing are part of why my designs stand out.  I don't really want to share all of my research material with her because:                              \n\n**1.** I worked really hard getting my degree in design and graduated with honors, and I don't feel responsible for teaching her how to do her job better. \n\n**2.** If I give her my info she will most likely come into the shop more often telling me how to do my job, wasting more time that I never have. \n\nWhat do I do without jeopardizing the relationship?", "summary": "If I help my friend by giving her my research for free, I'll be making her better at her job while I still get paid a fraction of what she does. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4brqpt", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (22/f) am crazy about my boyfriend (27/m), but we haven't been dating long. Should I wait to tell my family how close we are?", "post": "Reddit, I am so insanely, head over heels in love with my boyfriend, J. \n\nHumble bragging about us: We met when I moved to a new area for my job in July/August. We had been really great friends for months and ended up getting together on Valentine's day. We got very serious very quickly and have spent nearly everyday together since (admittedly, it's a little bit much but it's the honeymoon phase and we can't get enough of each other).  I don't think I could have dreamt of a better match for me. J's brilliant, creative, confident and unbelievably kind. His humor is clever and nerdy and immature in all of the right ways. He is so thoughtful and amazing at communicating, which is especially important because that is not my best trait. I've never been able to talk to anyone the way I can with him... And I've opened up more with J than I ever thought I would (with anyone). I could go on for pages just gushing about how infatuated I am with him. \n\nNeedless to say, we're both serious about this... we've said the I-love-you's and started looking for apartments to move in together in June. We're talking about long-term plans and I've already met a huge chunk of his family. It's real. I never would have imagined myself to jump into a relationship this quickly or intensely, but it's really real. And I'm thrilled!\n\nI want to yell it from treetops and tell the world... but I'm worried that people might think I'm being silly or naive and rushing into it. I am very close with my family and desperately want to tell them that I love him  and how serious we've gotten but I would be really upset if they wrote it off as some sort of tryst. \n\nSo that leads me to my question: Can I tell my family about my intense, new relationship? Or should I wait it out and bring it up on a more \"normal\" timeline?", "summary": "I love my boyfriend after ~6weeks of dating him. The 'pace' of the relationship doesn't bother me but I'm worried my family will write this off if I told them about it now."}
{"id": "t3_4eds4k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] met the right person [19F] at the wrong time.", "post": "So, currently in college (that's our way of saying before university in the UK) and i've been with this girl for a year and a half. I love her, and think she's amazing. But the downside is, i'm 18. I want to go and experience lots of different things in lots of different places, but I can't go and travel and do amazing things with her. I want to go and do these things myself and make new friends. \n\nI'm worried however, that if I approach her with this she'll go for it, but when I come back she'll have moved on with the relationship. We both feel the same way about each other, that's clear. Another point to make is that she has made plans to go and travel around Australia herself. \n\nThis may seem like a very selfish post, however I hope you can all understand that i'm young and want to expand my knowledge of the world and have my own individual experiences. For this to happen i'm looking at 2 or so years. Which is a long time I know, but as the title says, I met her too young. I'm not looking for criticism, i'm looking for people's own similar experiences and how they went about dealing with the situation. Thank you for reading, if I don't reply, i'm sleeping.", "summary": "I met my gf too early, I love her but want to take a break and go travelling for two years and refine myself as person. What are your past experiences and how did you deal with them?"}
{"id": "t3_2bre6l", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Is my plan reasonable?", "post": "First, thank you everybody. I lurk in this sub a decent amount. And have learned tons and gotten out of debt due to your discussions.\n\n30 y/o. No debt of any kind. Single, no children.\n\nOwn a reliable vehicle paid off. No large property owned aside from the car.\n\nIncome $6780.84 a month before taxes, SS, Medicare, etc.\nRent & utilities is about $1200 a month.\nI save $1542 every month into my emergency fund (Currently at $14,909.26).\nDeposit $1458 every month into Roth TSP (Currently at $3,745.84).\nDeposit $458 every month into Vanguard Roth IRA Target Retirement Fund 2045 (Currently at $11,460.24).\n\nThe remainder I save in my checking account and use for food, fuel, and any other costs.\n\nAfter I have $20,000 saved up for my emergency fund, I'd like to save at least $50,000 for a down payment on a home. I don't see myself purchasing a home anytime soon but would like to keep the option available by preparing for it.\n\nThe nature of my profession requires constant relocation. So I won't buy a home probably till I retire or decide I'm tired of moving every few years and change careers. Is this a good course of action? \n\nIf yes, is there a recommended method to save that $50,000 while earning interest safely and ability to withdraw it without penalties?\n\nIf no, what other options should I consider?\n\nThanks again!", "summary": "Want to save for down payment on a house, best way to do it? Or am I stupid for wanting to do it?"}
{"id": "t3_1kopoe", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "20 (m) with a 19(f) girlfriend, need urgent help", "post": "Hey guys I need some serious advice on something, my girlfriend of 6 months is losing her sex drive big time, and its really putting a damper on our relationship.\n\nWe both have talked about it numerous times but at the end of the day I can't shake the feeling that whenever we do it (1-2 times a week) its only because she knows I'll be upset if we don't.\n\nIt never used to be this way when we first started dating, and then she went on BC, which we have both discussed as a possible reason for the decline in her sex drive, but she doesn't want to go off of it and she doesn't seem to mind the lack of sex. \n\nWhat truly bothers me about all of it is that I genuinely feel like she doesn't even enjoy it anymore, and therefore the sex itself is sucking, a lot.  \n\nAll I wanna know is if laying off of initiating, (which lately has been every time were alone in my room, and getting denied like 40-50% of the time) will help, or if she will merely see it as a relief and be content with rarely ever having sex anymore. help reddit!", "summary": "Girlfriend of 6 months is losing sex drive and doesn't seem to mind, how do I make her want to have sex again?"}
{"id": "t3_2t0e9s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend of 2.5 years [28F] wants to have kids with me [28M] I don't. I haven't told them I've had a vasectomy.", "post": "We've always used contraception (her taking the pill) but over the last three months she's forgotten taken her pill three times. She's been taking the pill ever since she was a teen, I can not conclude if they've missed it by accident or not. Since she's forgotten her first pill I've worn a condom since.\n\nShe has now finished her packet and isn't going to get a prescription so for the foreseeable future (she see's me wearing the condom as good enough, and wants a \"break\" from artificial hormones).\n\nNow recently, more than usual she's been talking more about wanting to have a family. She's known since the start of our relationship that I do not wish to have one (Do I need to explain to Reddit why? Everyone usually demands an explanation). She thinks I'l change my mind about the topic in the future but I'm certain I won't.\n\nI've never let them know I've had a vasectomy. Do I tell them? Do I keep it to myself?", "summary": "We've always been on contraception. She's been hinting about having kids recently. They don't know I've had a vasectomy."}
{"id": "t3_1cd1st", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [22f] ditch this guy [27m], or am I jumping to conclusions too quickly?", "post": "We've been dating for about a month or so.\n\nThe good about him: he's taken me out to dinner, parties, breakfast, etc. He texts me nearly every day. He seems to communicate well, he's told me that he is looking for a relationship and that he likes me, etc. He told me that he doesn't like to 'hook up' with girls, that he likes to take it 'one at a time.' He said he likes being in relationships.\n\nThe bad: the last time we hung out, he seemed disinterested. I felt like I was having to carry the conversation. He didn't actually say much at all during dinner, and we just went home and passed out. One time at a party, I saw him going downstairs with a girl. I followed, and they were hanging out with a bunch of people smoking weed. It got me suspicious. He hasn't mentioned anything about us getting exclusive since we last talked about it awhile back. He seems to party a lot. He doesn't really compliment.\n\nThe thing is, I like him, but I don't want to get hurt.\n\nAm I just being over-analytical or is this guy a douche that is just leading me on? Also, how would I tell him that I no longer want to see him? We just hung out the other night, and I acted like everything was fine and dandy. It was when I got home and thought about it that I second guessed this guy.", "summary": "New guy I'm seeing seems really cool at first, then after a month things start to only be about sex. The other night at dinner he seemed distracted, and I just don't really want to set myself up to get hurt."}
{"id": "t3_3cxvib", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20/F] would like to have more 'close' friends [M and F] but I am afraid it'll be bad for my relationship with my SO [23/M] Advice?", "post": "Hey everyone, \n\nI have been in a relationship for about three + years now. \nShort summary: Long distance relationship, will live together in a month, happy relationship, skyping a lot daily; result of that is that I have only 1 close friend (who's moving 300 kilometers away this august) and 2 friends I do not see often. Because I skype a lot and don't do sports anymore I do not have many contacts outside my SO/family. \n\nI miss laughing, netflix'ing and being lazy with someone (other than my SO) to socialize with. The thing is, he's kind of jealous (distance makes it hard to not go crazy sometimes) and he thinks everyone I meet (example: at work or study) is somehow into me. I do not engage into a social/more-than-colleague relationship because I do not want to cause any trouble. \n\nDoes anyone of you have advice for me about finding a balance? Or how to make my SO accept male-friends/contacts? Make him less jealous? My relationship is very important for me and keeps me going every day. \n\nSometimes I just feel like talking about the stuff going on in my head other than my SO [he knows everything anyway] and want to hear another opinion. Right now I feel like I have no one to talk to beside him.", "summary": "How can I make my SO accept that I want to make/have close friends [M and F] without being jealous or anxiously about me leaving him/others hitting on me?"}
{"id": "t3_4ywra7", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I (33M) after recent breakup, don't know if I'm ready for dating again", "post": "Hi everyone.\n\nRecently my long term relationship ended, and I'm still struggling with some issues after the break up. Let me summarise:\n\nI was in a relationship for 8 years, half of that living together, which seemed to go very nicely as we were even organising our wedding just before the break up. But important changes in life (mainly me moving to another country for a new job) ended up revealing some insecurities, lies, and finally ending the relationship due to lack of willing to go forward by my ex-partner.\n\nThis happened 6 months ago, and even if at the start it was very hard, suddenly living alone in a different country when months ago I was planning a wedding and considering having kids, I was lucky as I joined a very nice group of people at work and my old friends even if far away have helped a lot.\n\nAfter the first months of missing my ex, it transitioned to just missing being with someone, and then I was able to just focus on myself, enjoying life and improving both my body and mind.\n\nAnd then... I started considering looking for women and dating. The problem is that I'm not really sure that I'm really prepared for a new relationship, or if I'm looking at it because I feel alone. This was my only serious relationship, so this is unexplored territory for me. Thinking cold about it, I kinda believe that I should wait until I don't feel the need to not be alone (6 months after 8 years is not that much after all). But at the same time I think that this relationship has showed me how much a family guy I am and that I really want to share my life with someone. And being 33 I'm starting to think that I don't have that much time if I want that type of life too..\n\nMy question is, how do you know when you are ready to date again, if wanting to be in a relationship is something that you are not going to just forget?", "summary": "unexpected breakup after 8 year relationship, I feel the need to be with someone but I don't know if it's too soon."}
{"id": "t3_4k4uu8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20F] housemate [19F] is dating a guy [23M] who I found on a dating app", "post": "Hey all! I'm just looking for a little advice on what to do. \n\nI just recently moved into a new apartment, and I get on really well with my new housemate, lets call her April. She's funny, and really easy to chill with. I'm hoping we can become good friends. \n\nRecently (the past 3 months) Aprils's been dating this guy, Greg, that she met on a dating app. She's been turning down other dates and claims that it would be wrong to see other men as she's so into Greg. They hang out regularly, text often and all that good stuff. \n\nMe, thinking that she had such good luck on the app downloaded it as well. I saw Greg. He was online and had put out a date request, but I can't tell how long ago that was posted. From what I can tell he's still looking for other people. \n\nThe thing is, I don't know my new housemate very well. I understand her to be monogamous, but don't know their relationship dynamic. I don't want it to be weird if I say something, but I also don't want her to get played.", "summary": "My housemate seems to think she's exclusive with a guy she met online, I saw the same guy online still actively looking for people. Do I tell her?"}
{"id": "t3_1lk5jw", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Told off my friend/boss, what to do?", "post": "So I was at a party with my friend (who happens to also be my boss) and the girl I've been seeing/hooking up with. It's a pretty big party and everyone is drinking etc. My girl is acting kinda weird, flirty with other guys and generally not too attentive to me. I tell her I'm feeling tired and want to leave. I walk outside briefly and when I return she's making out with my friend/boss. Basically ended with me telling him off, to go fuck himself, that he fucked up etc and with her begging me to get in the car with her. I ended up getting dropped off by someone else altogether. They both seemed fairly sorry but I still haven't really talked to either one since. Not sure what to do, lots of mixed feelings, work is approaching on Tuesday and ill have to see him.", "summary": "My friend who is also my boss kissed a girl I'm seeing and I told them both to fuck themselves, don't know how it's gonna be returning to work on Tuesday or what to do "}
{"id": "t3_43rdx4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27M] just became exclusive with [27F], how can I figure out if she likes public affection without suggesting it?", "post": "I'm sure it's obvious but I'm new to relationships so excuse the question if it is something blatantly obvious. I'm neutral, but I understand people usually have a preference for whether they like to show public affection or not, eg holding hands/kissing. The girl has been making me take the lead on most things and I'd rather not do it if she isn't overly into it. I also don't want to just naturally do it in case she misunderstands that I prefer to do it.\n\nI'm meeting her for our first date since becoming official later today. Should I perhaps just casually text her asking before we meet, or is there better way to go about it?", "summary": "Should I just ask if she likes to show public affection? I don't want her to misunderstand that I like to."}
{"id": "t3_2ysjjg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my ex [25 F] 8 months. I'm really struggling with what she wants from me.", "post": "Okay, so I have a lot of feelings still for my ex, not in the \"HEY LETS DATE\" again way just emotion I suppose, we broke up (she ended it with me) but used to get angry if I would date someone else. \n\nShe wanted to be friends but yeah, she'd get angry and block me if I went on a date with someone and she found out. It left me in a very weird situation because I like my ex, she's a nice person and I'd prefer her to be in my life rather than completely gone.\n\nfew months ago she went out with another guy which is fine but I'm not sure why, the guy she went out with was everything she hated in a guy and I felt like she did it to kind of wind me up by letting me know what they're up to etc. \n\nLow and behold we had an argument as she found out I was now in a relationship with someone else and we're going great :). when my ex found out she hit the roof with stuff, refused to meet up and talk everything through like adults, wouldn't pick up the phone and eventually blocked me on Whatsapp, Twitter, Facebook etc, saying don't contact her. \n\nSo I haven't it's been over 2 months but recently she's unblocked me on these things and I'm weirded out as to why she would? I did what she told me with not contacting her, but now she's unblocked me on all these and 0 contact for that time I'm worried as to who should maybe say the first words? I want her as a friend, she's been a big part of my life and helped me through a lot of difficult times and our relationship seemed good.", "summary": "We got in an argument, she blocked me on everything saying don't contact her, few months later she's unblocked me and I'm wondering if I should maybe try and reach out to her. "}
{"id": "t3_2m2r7b", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "She(22f) confuses me so much, I(22m) don't understand what she wants.", "post": "Me and this girl have been friends for a little bit. I felt like there has been an attraction between us so I asked her if she thought so. She said she thinks there is something between us but she doesn't want to pressure it.\n\nI asked her if her if she wanted to see where it could go, no pressure. Then she said she's doesn't know and wants to stay friends. I'm okay with that.\n\nNow we hung out again, and she says things that seem like she wants something. Like she's implying that she wants me. For example, We were talking and i mentioned that im slighty younger then her(by 9 months) and she says, \" I dont know if this is going to work out between us, i dont go for younger guys\" in a flirty way.\n\nWhat does she mean? I dont get it. Should i make my move next time?", "summary": "I told a girl i was liked to her, she said she wants to be friends but now shes saying suggestive things like she wants something more."}
{"id": "t3_3oei3x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18/M] am wondering if I should ask her [18/F] again.", "post": "I dated this girl and it was amazing. She was diagnosed with an apathy disorder earlier this year and...We broke up due to her wanting me not to be troubled with her mental disorder. I said to her that it won't bother me but she really wanted it as she wanted to focus on her studies and because this may be my last year she said she thought hard about it and wanted to break up.\n\n2 Months later we talked about it and I asked her questions. She said she still had feelings for me and that over time it will go away. I confessed and told my feelings. I just wanted to know. I told her I won't bother her about it anymore but...I just can't bare to see the feelings go away over time as it is painful...\n\nI want to get back with her but I have this conflicting feeling of not doing it due to what she said of how she does not want to. Should I atleast tell her how I feel about all this? Right now we are good friends and we enjoy each others company, but due to this complicated scenario I just can't stand the thought of us breaking up not due to incompatibility but due to how she decided that I can't handle her mental disorder.\n\nI would love some advice.", "summary": "I dated a girl and broke up due to her having a mental disorder. We still both like each other but are not dating each other. Should I ask her out again?"}
{"id": "t3_zfqf4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have absolutely no idea what to do with my life, and it stresses me out almost daily. [22 M]", "post": "Pretty much what the title says. I'm about to graduate junior college. I want to start my life with my girlfriend very badly, but I just don't know what to do. All of the things I've had interest in have been deemed un-attainable by friends and family. My best friend regularly tells me not to get my dream job, but to get some office job and shoot for 3 figures. Also: I'm retarded at math, so my original major choice of Astronomer, and my computer choices thereafter are kind of a bust. I thought about being a Writer, Voice Actor, and pretty much every job in the video game industry that doesn't have anything to do with math (not many). Everyone says \"Those jobs are really hard to get...you should just work at [insert soul-sucking job here], or in the Oilfields (local industry with a bunch of high-school drop outs, drug addicts and other terrible kinds of people).\" Every birthday that goes by it presses down on my shoulders further. Friends complete degrees, start families, own homes, and here I am: 5th year of Junior College because I don't know what to do.", "summary": "I don't know what to do with my life, and my friends/family and math ineptitude haven't helped. As I keep getting older this worries me more and more."}
{"id": "t3_36r8gg", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[HELP][VENT]The vet told me my dog is EXTREMELY aggressive. What steps should I take?", "post": "So back story about the dog, His name is lei and I adopted him from my local humane society about a month ago. He's a 4 y.o. shiba inu who, from what I have seen, is the sweetest dog. He also gets along quite well with my cat(he will sometimes bark and try to play with the cat -.-) but other than that they will lay right next to each other and go to sleep. So after having the dog for 2 weeks I thought I would bring him to the vet to turn in his papers and register him in the system. Before doing so, my dog has been around 20+ new people and I've never had any issues with aggression. (No hand biting, growling, snapping, etc) He is really shy around someone he first meets but other than that he's fine. As soon as I got to the vet my dog was clearly nervous/scared/anxious. After waiting for almost an hour to be seen I managed to calm him and have him sit next to me on a bench. Once our name was called, however, the noise from inside scared him out again.(trying to go back out and having his tail down) The lady who takes my dog is clearly irritated at the type of breed I have. She talked to me as if I knew nothing about the breed and snapped angrily about how aggressive the breed was. After waiting for the nurse to return with my dog she proceeded to tell me about how my dog is EXTREMELY people aggressive and ill have a lawsuit on my hands if I don't fix it. Then handed me 50 million pamphlets on dog trainers in my area. What should I do? What's the best course of action? Get my dog evaluated? Or go to a different vet? It' crazy because I've been going to this one my whole life and never had an issue.", "summary": "Rescued a 4yo Shiba. Haven't had any issues yet. Vet told me my dog is extremely aggressive, told me to get the problem fixed. Have yet to see aggression, extremely confused.  What do?"}
{"id": "t3_srsiq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's your worse travel story?", "post": "Several years ago, a few drinking buddies and I were driving to Virginia on vacation. After driving for nearly 16 hours straight, we stopped for dinner one night in Maryland. I forget the name of the town or the eatery, but we ate at this little cafe right on the main drag. We were too tired to realize it at the time but the place only served vegan meals. Being the incredible dumbasses that we are, we neglected to read the menu and instead ordered cheeseburgers in the hope that we could eat quick and get back to driving.\n\nThe meals come out and we scarf them down, totally oblivious to the  other patron's horror. We pay for our meal and get back on the road, intent on making our destination by morning. About an hour later, we all start to feel rumblies in our tummies.\n\nWhat happened next will go down in legend.\n\nSimultaneously, the four of us get violently ill inside my buddy's truck. Somehow, and to this day I thank him for it, he gets off to the shoulder of the road and we all sprint for ditch. For the next half hour, anyone on 95 going South could see four rednecks losing their non-vegan, vegan chef prepared meals in the most horrible way possible. It was so bad that even after we were done, none of us could eat or drink anything besides ice chips the rest of the trip", "summary": "Four rednecks mistake a Vegan restaurant for a burger joint, get food poisoning by said restaurant, make an ass of themselves on interstate.*"}
{"id": "t3_3d0wk7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my [24 F] hopefully more than one date", "post": "Recently, I met someone from an smartphone dating app (not tinder, but similar). We talked for a few days and realized we had a lot of similar interests so we decided to meet up yesterday. We both had a great afternoon and she's someone I'd really like to get closer with. Only problem is she lives 60 miles away, so close enough for a day trip but a little too far just to go for dinner or something like that. I dont live in a major city either and 60 miles is a few counties over.\n\nMy question is how can I get to the next level with her despite living an hour away? I dont mind driving but at this point we're still getting to know each other and have to be doing some kind of planned activity to feel comfortable, which is difficult to coordinate when you dont live in the same place and are two busy people.\n\nAny advice is appreciated!", "summary": "Met a girl I really like and get along great with. She lives an hour drive away. How should I go about the initial dating stage?"}
{"id": "t3_2kyfp1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by helping my dad split logs", "post": "2 years ago hurricane sandy came through, and we actually made out pretty well. A fucking massive tree did fall on my house, but it hit another tree on the way down, and that kinda softened the blow. In any case, after a lot of other stories, we got the tree off the house.\n\nMy family is pretty good at making the best of things, and we thought \"well, now we have a few thousand pounds of firewood!\". We have a fireplace that we like to use.\n\nYou can't use the logs right away because they have to dry out. I honestly don't remember if we split any last year, but even this year we have plenty left. So, I figured I'd be a good sport and help out, and split some logs.\n\nMy dad was in an accident recently, and broke his wrist, so wielding an axe isn't exactly something that's very comfortable for him. Another incentive for me to help out. It's at this point that I should note- He got a brand new handle for the axe about 2 weeks ago.\n\nI grab the axe (actually a maul but whatever) and the sledge, and he gives me some pointers. I hit like 4 logs off center, and make real crappy attempts. At this point I'm feeling like I'm not helping much, but he's cool about it.\n\nOn the 5th or 6th log I over swing, and BAM I bust the head clean off the handle. I casually tossed the handle down, looked at my dad, and said \"well, looks like I owe you a handle.\" I felt pretty damn bad.\n\nFortunately he was cool about it, and said that's part of learning.", "summary": "Tried to help dad who can't really split logs due to injury, busted the axe apart, he was pretty cool about it."}
{"id": "t3_1183hq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's your most regrettable \"Socially Awkward Penguin\" moment?", "post": "So I was visiting San Francisco for the weekend, and I sort of got sucked into attending a \"Florence + Machine\" concert. I wasn't too excited to be spending my Friday night there but I dealt with it. We were in the assigned seating section and I was glad to see that my seat was next to a very cute blonde gal. After a few minutes, this girl giving me signs that she might be interested in me. As the night went on, these signs became more and more obvious and I wanted to strike up a conversation so badly...but instead I sat there awkwardly the entire night, too afraid to even look in her direction. At one point I thought that if I consumed some alcohol I would think of something great to start the conversation with, but I ended up acting becoming even more awkward. The reason I regret this is because now that I'm back home from California, I have absolutely no way of knowing who she was, where she was from, or if she was actually interested. Plus I'll never be able to explain why I was such an awkward asshole! \n\nI have to finish with saying that I work in a job that requires me to constantly socialize with people so I have no idea what the hell happened to me to make me freeze.", "summary": "A very cute girl I saw at a concert spent an entire evening trying to get me to talk to her. Instead of getting to know her, I spent the entire night being very awkward, not knowing what to do or say."}
{"id": "t3_1ee8vd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do my (F25) parents need to meet my SO's (M27) parents?", "post": "So my SO's mother lives over 5 hours away from us and my family. She is coming to visit and has made a point of saying how she expects that she will be invited for a dinner or something with my parents.\n\nWe have been living together for close to a year, probably going to get married, though I'm not really sure yet. \n\nI would prefer to wait until we decide to get engaged for this meeting to happen because his mom is bat-shit crazy and talks endlessly about random shit like stories about people we do not know and never will know. \n\nAt the same time she makes no effort to get to know us. She says that \"she loves me as her own family\" yet really knows nothing about me because on the occasions when we go to visit she doesn't let me get a word in and doesn't seem to want to talk about anything of relevance.\n\nI know my parents' personalities wont jive with her personality, and worry that them getting together is a shit-show waiting to happen. Add this to the fact that I'm not 100% sure on whether I want to marry this guy, I just don't think I should be forced to set up an awkward meeting between my parents and his mother.\n\nWe did have a discussion about it before, but he ended up just getting frustrated and dropping it so as to not jeopardize our relationship. But I still feel he is resentful about this and I'm sure it will come up closer to the time when his mother is going to visit.\n\nAm I being fair? How can I explain this to my SO without coming off as being stubborn?", "summary": "I don't want my boyfriends crazy mother to meet my parents until I'm completely sure he's the one I'm going to marry."}
{"id": "t3_4wym9v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [36/F] coworker [late 20's/M] who inappropriately hit on me just asked me to write him a letter of recommendation", "post": "I am in a very happy relationship and a guy I work with flirted with me a few months back.  He said that he found me \"stunning,\" but he said it in a casual way in the middle of a conversation when we were consulting about something else that was fairly serious.  I was very uncomfortable with it and told my boyfriend about it, which then made him uncomfortable.  He said I did nothing wrong, which I agree with, and since then I've tried to avoid the co-worker as much as possible.\n\nAlso since then, it came out that he hooked up with a colleague at work and then treated her poorly, causing her to be so upset she quit the job.  I have noticed many many more ways that he is inappropriate, has horrible boundaries and moreso just has huge issues.  We work in the mental health field and I have a higher position and degree than him so it REALLY bothers me to see how he acts.\n\nToday he asked if I would write a letter of recommendation for him to go to counseling school.  I personally think he could be a good clinician, if he had more training, so I think it's a great idea for him to learn boundaries, ethics, theories, etc.  However, I feel really weird about writing him a letter of recommendation, mainly because my boyfriend was uncomfortable with him flirting with me, and also because I don't think he has good judgement at the moment, but he could eventually have it with the proper training.  I'm a people pleaser so in the moment I said yes.  But now I feel awkward, what do I do?", "summary": "Guy at work hit on me, has horrible boundaries now he wants me to write him a letter of recommendation to go to school in the mental health field."}
{"id": "t3_2ynenq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [21/M] been dating this girl [21/F] for three weeks and I'm not sure if we're moving too fast.", "post": "We both have amazing chemistry and it seems we're almost always on the same page. We're both pretty infatuated with each other. Never before had I had the urge to text a girl almost daily (and I'm known as a horrible texter), see a girl often or really get to know them.\n\nWe both have never been in a relationship before and are typically scared of commitment. I mentioned last week that I felt we were moving too fast and we should take it slow. I told her I don't want to hurt her if we don't work out and she said she's strong if it happens, and that she said we'll see where time takes us. \n\nWe had one drunken talk this past weekend and admitted our feelings to each other. I said I was falling in love with her and she said she really liked me. At one point in the conversation, she almost said I love you...but stopped. She started getting emotional and started crying and I wasn't sure if it was out of happiness and/or sadness. She said she never gone this far with a guy and I mentioned the same. I said for us to be monogamous but not official to determine if our feelings are real and not circumstantial. \n\nAt these times when I talk about the state of our relationship, I feel like she always agree with what I say and doesn't give any dissent. I don't know if this is a good or bad thing. \n\nI'm probably being an asshole right now. I feel like I'm trying to fight the feeling of falling in love/being in love because I've never felt these feelings before and things are going too smoothly to be true.", "summary": "I've been dating this girl for three weeks and we both have never been in a relationship before nor gone this far with someone in terms of dating, thoughts? "}
{"id": "t3_31gtio", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (26m) have had a falling out with a good friend (25f), but I need to tell her something.", "post": "Hello everyone, first off, sorry for the vague title, I suck at titles apparently, let's hope I don't suck at typing the rest ;)\n\nObligatory mobile/non native sentence.\n\nLong story short, I have/had a very good friend (25f), we had a very good bond but for the past few weeks we had a falling out. \n\nThe problem however is that she is in a bad situation with someone else, her dancing teacher, whom she had an argument with. \nI know her teacher personally as well, so I know every detail of the situation since a few days (before that I wasn't really digging into their problem but it came up in a conversation).\n\nNow the thing is, I know what to say to both of them so that they can resolve their problem, something I know will make my friend a lot happier. \n\nHowever, I know she won't like me (or anyone for that matter) interfering with her life and chances are she won't react positive towards me nomatter the outcome.\n\nSo what do you guys think I should do?\n\nOption A is I keep completely out of it, nothing changes.\n\nOption B is I do what is necessary for them to fix their problem.\n\nHonestly I care more for her being happy (dancing is a BIG thing for her) then her being pissed at me, hell, I'd see it as an heroic sacrifice, she'll hate me but her she can go back and do something she loves.\n\nSo I'm leaning towards B, get myself involved, fix this for her, nomatter the fallout. \n\nSo people, advice please, are you going to talk me into it or out of it?\n\nCheers!", "summary": "friend and I aren't talking, I know a solution to a big problem of her. Should I help her even if it won't help me?"}
{"id": "t3_1jx3t0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the whole 'WakeUpNow' business opportunity and how legitimate is it?", "post": "Recently a couple of people I know started promoting this business called 'WakeUpNow'. They were explaining to me how they are this business that offers discounts on travel, groceries, and many other expenses, and it is an opportunity for you to make money by marketing their business. I was told that the system works by getting a certain number of friends & family to 'sign up' with this business, and then when you have enough people under you then you can start earning $600 to $10k a month, just by solely marketing the business & signing people up, and supposedly they offer you take vacations at huge discounts, just by \"taking a picture of the receipt and posting on a social media website and claim 'in a business meeting', and then the company reimburses you\". Now doing some research, some people say they are a scam and don't do it, others say it is a legit business and not a pyramid scheme.\n\nI'm looking for legitimate answers. Is it pyramid scheme? How does this company generate money? Anyone on Reddit have experience (good or bad) with this company. **I am not interested in this company**, I'm just digging for details on what this company is about?", "summary": "People I know are into this 'WakeUpNow' business opportunity, some say it is fake, others disagree. What's the whole idea with this company?"}
{"id": "t3_289wq7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21 M/F] Just Started Seeing This Girl and Her Ex Is Threatening to Hill Himself", "post": "Met a great girl last week, we've been clicking so fast and I know that we have something great going for us. We went out on our first date and she explained to me her situation with her ex, which had me in awe and I did not really know what to tell her.\n\nShe was about to break up with her ex when I think he started to sense she was going to. They were staying in a hotel for the weekend, and he threatened to kill himself by jumping off a balcony. When she tried to restrain him he threw her away where she ended up going through a glass table. To add fuel to the fire he began telling people she raped him on the trip and he doesn't trust her anymore.\n\nThe worst part is he texts her just about everyday and she is clueless on how to handle it. She doesn't want to feel responsible if she does end up killing herself, and she complies to talk to him just to avoid this. She assured me there are no feelings at all, but she does it because she couldn't live with herself.\n\nI literally had no idea how to respond. I told her I was glad she was sharing this with me, but I really don't know how the handle the situation. Usually when people say they're going to kill themselves over a girlfriend, it's just to find a little glimmer of hope and to hold on to something that is not there. This girl has a huge heart and I think she really doesn't want to feel that guilt.\n\nHow do I go about helping her out in this situation? It seems really tricky and I don't want to get in the middle, but I really like this girl and he needs to back the fuck off.", "summary": "Started seeing a new girl I really like, her ex threatened to kill himself when they broke up, he started harassing her, and now she doesn't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_39j26m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[22/F] suspect my guy-friend[24/M] who wants to sleep with me is still taken and using me to sleep around with", "post": "My friend 'Sean' and I have known each other for a little over three years. We're fairly good friends, but somewhat fell out of contact a while ago when he graduated from our university. We share a pretty large friend group, though, and they usually know how he's doing and trying to invite him to our outings. Through the group I knew that Sean was dating 'Maggie', a younger girl(19) from out of town. \n\nBut last April, Sean contacted me out of the blue and started striking up conversations over messenger, ostensibly to seehow I was. I enjoyed talking to him again after a few months of no contact, and soon after our conversations started he told me he had been thinking about me and wanted to sleep together at some point. I asked if he was still with Maggie, and he said he had broken up with her the past month.\n\nWe continued to banter the following months, and eventually scheduled our first 'date' for this upcoming Saturday. I was pretty excited, and was hanging out with some of the guys from our friend group today. Sean's best friend, 'Matthew', didn't seem to know that Sean and I were seeing each other, which struck me as weird since Sean tells Matthew everything. Later that day, Matthew also offhandedly mention that he had been hanging out with \"Sean and his girlfriend\" last weekend.\n\nI'm not sure if it's a misunderstanding or if I'm overreacting, but I'm worried that Sean may still be seeing Maggie and trying to sleep with me behind her back. I had a big crush on him a year or so ago(which he knew about and did not return at the time), and I'm worried he might just be trying to take advantage of me and my feelings. How do I broach this subject with him without sounding accusatory?", "summary": "I suspect my friend[24/M] might be taking advantage of my[22/F] crush on him to cheat on his girlfriend, and I'm not sure how to get the truth out of him."}
{"id": "t3_yiufm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Spanish/English speakers of Reddit. What are good resources/tools to help a 20 year old Spanish speaker learn basic English?", "post": "I am working with the Migrant Education program in New Hampshire. This boy is 20 years old, a Spanish speaker, and knows very little English. He wants to learn basic vocabulary in English. So far I have been looking for podcasts to put on his Ipod to listen to while he works. However, most of these podcasts are too advanced. He has also expressed interest in watching movies in English with Spanish subtitles, but most of these movies move too fast for him. I am trying to find something that moves slower without being at a child's interest level. His English is EXTREMELY limited. What tools/tricks do you suggest?", "summary": "He is a twenty year old Spanish speaker who wants to learn VERY basic English preferably through auditory or visual means. I'm trying to find age appropriate lessons."}
{"id": "t3_20c1hv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend[22F] told me[22M] \"Why are we still dating if I make you feel angry/sad?\"... We have been together for almost 3 years.", "post": "I've heard that phrase 2 or 3 times and I've had enough. Sometimes I feel like she wants ME to end the relationship for whatever reason. After a small argument we had, it went something like this.\n\nHer: \"Why are we still dating if I make you feel angry/sad?\"\n\nMe: \"Because I love you? Are you telling me that you want this to end?\"\n\nHer: \"No\" \n\nMe: \"So why did you bring that up?\"\n\nHer: \"I love you so much and it's not like I want to solve this by breaking up, but I don't want to hurt you\"\n\nShe's very sweet and she always tells me how \"happy\" she is with me, our sex life is great (she lost her virginity with me), we always have a great time when we are together, etc... Most of our problems are caused by lack of communication or misunderstandings.\n\nLately I've had a \"feeling\" that shes hiding something from me, she's \"acting\" normal, but I just have that strange feeling that something is not \"right\", for example, a few days ago she went out with her sister (that's what she told me, honestly I'm not sure) to do some errands, she was SO reserved when she was explaining me what she was doing, where she was and why she didn't replied to my messages... Some stuff seemed a little bit \"suspicious\".\n\nWhen she goes out with her sister (or her mom) she always messages me \"We are almost home\", but that day she wrote \"I'm almost home\", implying she was alone. Maybe I'm just f****** crazy. We live like 3 hours away so we only see each other like once per week.", "summary": "My gf told me \"Why are we still dating if I make you feel angry/sad?\" after a small argument, I would never say something like that to her. Is it normal? Is it a warning sign?"}
{"id": "t3_hjzk0", "subreddit": "self", "title": "\"Give the goat head\"?", "post": "A coworker of mine said, \"I'll run some preliminary tests first before I give you the goat head\" over AIM. \n\nShould I have corrected him? If so, how should I have responded?\n\nI'm asking reddit because there are a lot of people who have (strong) opinions on grammar nazis and when to behave like one. \n\nMy opinion is that so long as the main message is conveyed well enough, I don't say a word. (For example, everyone knows what a grammar nazi is. Should I have taken the time to find out whether \"grammer\" and/or \"nazi\" should be capitalized? I don't think so.) But I also wouldn't mind if someone corrected me. It's kind of for my own edification, and I think it improves how well I can express myself with words.\n\nSo, in the case with my convo with my coworker, I didn't say anything because I knew what he meant. But I also thought, \"What if he uses that phrase incorrectly again? What if someone corrects him later and he thinks that I don't know the correct usage because I didn't say anything?\" I might be thinking about this too much. \n\nAnyway, what would you have done?", "summary": "A coworker of mine said, \"I'll run some preliminary tests first before I give you the goat head\" over AIM.  Should I have corrected him?"}
{"id": "t3_2lzu8c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] was seeing a guy [26M] for about 2 weeks. I think he took nudes of me, and may have shared them.", "post": "Ok. So I was hooking up with a cowoker (I know, horrible idea) for about two weeks back in August before I broke things off. There were several red flags: \n\n1) I told me he \"loved\" me after about three days.\n\n2) He didn't understand the word no, and I had to either yell at him to stop trying to have sex with me or physically leave the room for him to get the message (made even worse by the fact that I, myself, have been raped and he was aware of this.\n\n3) There were two/three incidents when I was in bed, naked, mostly asleep, he had his phone out and pointed towards me. \n\n4) When I tried to end things, he grabbed my wrists really freakin' hard and pulled me towards him while yelling \"NO!\", and that I couldn't break up with him because he loves me (I'm 133, he was like 200? of solid muscle). Super scary.\n\nNow, I don't know for sure if he actually took any photos of me. But he recently switched to working the night shift, where I work middle shift - so I do still have some interaction with the night shift people. Since he started working nights, people at work have started treating me differently. \n\nSo, I don't know what to do. The last time I saw him at work, I said we needed to talk, but was running late for the bus, so I had to go. I gave it two days and then texted him about it. No response. Any advice? I am partially hesitant to see him one-on-one as he did scare me a lot...but I feel like I have to know what's going on and if he took any pictures of me.", "summary": "Coworker I hooked up with for 2 weeks may have taken nudes of me. May also be talking about me behind my back at work or something. Have tried to contact him to talk about it, no response. "}
{"id": "t3_39cwyy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my boyfriend[26 M] of almost 2 years, live with his parents, we're trying to get healthy. How do I get his mother to understand this?", "post": "So my boyfriend and I stay with his parents, and we are both constantly on the go. We are saving to buy our own place and we live in Hawaii so it is very expensive here. So, just moving out isn't an option. \n\nHe and I are trying to eat healthier (his parents say they are too) but when I cook, I need to cook enough for everyone in the house rather than just the 2 of us. That would mean 6 of us total. \n\nHis mom does the grocery shopping and we do some as well. I am getting so sick of her buying crap food. She buys only cheap and processed food and if I don't cook then they eat crap when I'm not there or if I don't cook. I could do all the grocery shopping but thats expensive for a family of 6. She says she wants to eat healthy but all she buys is crap. Spam, vienna sausages, ground beef, cream of mushroom, and other things.  NEVER buys fruit and when she does, it goes bad because she doesnt cut. it only gets cut if my boyfriend or myself cut it. She'll buy vegetable here and there but rarely because she says they go bad to fast, but thats because she's always trying to make junk food.\n\n And for meal prepping, thats impossible in that house. If you have food in there, and someone wants to eat, there it goes! I can deal with this but its mainly the buying groceries and cooking. I don't know what to do with this woman. I understand she gets home late from work and just wants to throw stuff together but shes going about this wrong. What do i do?", "summary": "my soon to be MIL is lazy and is saying she ways to get healthy but doesn't do anything for it. I don't want to do all the shopping, and cooking for a family of 6. HELP?"}
{"id": "t3_1m0hci", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I got yelled at for standing up at a concert while the people behind me wanted to sit. Am I the asshole?", "post": "I was at a concert this weekend supporting my favorite artist. Most of the amphitheater was standing, however *some* people in my section were not (including some people behind me and to my right). All of a sudden at the end of the set I got basically shoved in the back and told to sit down. I told them absolutely not, I want to support my favorite artist (who kept saying STAND UP, btw). I paid over $100 for these seats and I want to have a great time.. after all this IS a concert. Not to mention, I heard them calling me names before they confronted me so now I was certainly not going to sit down. Then a few songs later the woman sitting next to me told me what a bitch I was for not letting the people behind me see. Was I in the wrong here?", "summary": "I stood at a concert while the people behind me sat and I got screamed at... am I in the wrong? "}
{"id": "t3_qkhfz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I owe Chase 50K and they won't let me pay, what do I do?", "post": "I have been unemployed (or without full time employment) since graduating in December of 2010. In September of 2011 my loans became due. I tried to deal with them then by staggering payments and trying to get an economic forbearance, but they would have none of if. Yesterday I called them again to try to work out a payment plan and they told me that the loan has been \"charged off\", and that I would have to deal with Chase's collections branch. They (the collections office) told me that the loan was now due in full. They added that no payment options were available aside from full payment, financing would have to be obtained through an outside party. I have no credit, I have no job, there is no one that is going to loan me 50K right now. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do at this point. \n\nside info: this is two private student loans, my wife co-signed, I own a house that I'm afraid will have a lien put on.", "summary": "By the time I could make payments on the two loans I had taken out, they went into collections. The bank is not willing to work with me in anyway to resolve the problem other than full payment."}
{"id": "t3_w4ujh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Should my brother of 13 years be allowed to play Skyrim?", "post": "Background: My brother wants to start playing Skyrim. Since I used to be a notorious gamer myself my father has asked me to decide if my brother should be able to play this game or if he really is to young, since its age limit is 16 (in my country). \nNow I'm not sure what to say on the one hand I don't want to be the bad parent to my brother that doesn't allow him to have fun (you know how these kids are) but on the other hand I want to provide a fair evaluation why he should or should not be able to play, to my father.\n\nCould you also name reasons (for instance what parts in the game make it an absolute nogo) for why he should or should not be able to play.", "summary": "Father asked me to decide for my 13 year old brother whether he should be allowed to play Skyrim which has an age limit of 16 in my country."}
{"id": "t3_1soh6v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] am finding myself seeking validation of my appearance from others, while not taking seriously my long-term boyfriend [20M]", "post": "I think part of this has to do with the fact that I spend a lot of time with my boyfriend and his friends, so I'm constantly exposed to the way his friends talk about girls - not in a derogatory way, just kind of admiring certain girls' beauty and bodies.  I feel really immature for getting insecure when this happens because I know I'm pretty and I'm sure any of those guys would say the same. My boyfriend has hinted that his friends have said things about me being attractive before, but he always refuses to go into detail. I just wish every time I hung out with them I wasn't wearing sweatpants with no makeup on, because I feel like then they'd think of me less like a bro, and more like a hot girl. When I talk to my boyfriend about this and he tells me I'm beautiful, it just seems meaningless because of course he'd say that - he's my boyfriend. I feel really stupid and selfish for wanting more because I'm truly in a really happy relationship. I am just sick of my insecurities and I was wondering if this is a normal thing to feel. Does any of this make sense? Sorry, I'm typing on my phone so it's hard to look back and proofread.", "summary": "I love my relationship and my close friendships with my boyfriend's friends, but I keep finding myself wishing that they viewed me as a pretty girl, rather than just as a \"bro\""}
{"id": "t3_40kiox", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting some food.", "post": "Well this happened about an hour ago. I was at a restaurant with family. We ordered our food and sat down to eat. All was good up until we finished our food. At this restaurant they gave us Styrofoam plates and my cousin thought it was pretty funny to write \"suck my ass :)\" onto  his plate and it was directed at me. We didn't think much of it and we figured they are going to get thrown away. At this particular restaurant they didn't have a trash can and we had to give them the plates our selves. We left not thinking about it at all. As we were about to leave the owner or manager of this establishment told us we might as well not come back for the note we left them and now I can no longer go back. The worst part is one of them was a teacher at my school and its a pretty small town. I have no idea what tommorow has in store  for me but I hope it just blows over.", "summary": "I went to eat at a local restaurant. My cousin wrote suck my ass smiley face on his Styrofoam plate. And we are now banned from there."}
{"id": "t3_2k0nb8", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Speeding down highway. Can I get a ticket?", "post": "18, Male, Tennessee.\nI was speeding, like 120 in a 65. Some girl kept trying to speed up with me in a shit car, I drive a turbo g35 it was no match but she wouldn't budge she'd push her little car around trying to pass me, and obviously putting her life in danger, I'm no godly driver but I know my car, and the road. I knew what I could do speed wise, and I constantly took it back to around 80 before she'd speed up. Eventually I had to turn, and she held up her phone, and a piece of paper, I assumed it was her number but now that I think about it she probably got my tags and plans to report or something, I want to know could I get in trouble? \nOn mobile.", "summary": "a girl saw me speeding, sped up grabbed tag number and held up her phone, what will/can happen? "}
{"id": "t3_10e6pr", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Babysat a kitten over the weekend who turned out to have fleas - what should I do?", "post": "I'm looking for some advice - I babysat a kitten over the weekend who it seems like just started getting fleas.  The owner had been aware of the flea dirt, but didn't do anything about it (and also didn't tell me that this was happening).  I found a few adult fleas on the kitten, and informed the owner and told her she needs to treat the kitten.  Now, I'm wondering what I should do about my apartment.  It seems like this was early on in terms of when the fleas started, however, I'm worried because I was hoping to adopt a new cat soon as my former cat passed away earlier this month.  Do you guys have any advice for how to treat my apartment and also how worried should I be about possible flea infestation?", "summary": "Babysat a kitten with fleas for a few days, no cat of my own currently, what should I do to treat my apartment?"}
{"id": "t3_mnbvz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit: What MacGyver moments have made you feel like a total badass? I'll start....", "post": "Just got inside from my apartment balcony after a half hour of trying to fish an envelope off the balcony below me with a tent pole. So I was going to throw my credit card down to my son's mom who was going to buy him some Pop Tarts because I'm on the 3rd floor and she'd just run down with the wrong card by accident and didn't want to come back up. I put it in a random envelope that was on my table just because it felt like the right thing to do before tossing it down and the envelope caught the wind and sailed onto the balcony directly beneath mine, which belongs to an unoccupied apartment. Too far from my balcony or the ground floor for a broom to reach, maintenance guy not available, I ponder 5 minutes or so. A light bulb flashes in my head....tent pole. I inserted each segment of the pole into the end of the other, but ultimately when I held it vertically the weight of it pulled it apart. Pulled it back up, scotch taped each joint (no good tape in the apartment, of course), gave it another 20 minutes, and bam, knocked it to the ground and went down and got it. My son's enjoying a blueberry poptart....Fuck yeah", "summary": "Got my credit card back with a tent pole, some scotch tape and a half hour on my balcony. "}
{"id": "t3_10rmpv", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[18m]Hit off with girl at party, exchanged numbers, she set up a date... Now she says she might cancel due to studying, not sure how to proceed.", "post": "Met a girl last night at a party, we talked ages and then exchanged numbers, she invited me for a drink at a bar this evening, earlier when I texted her about what time she wanted to go she says she might not be able to go due to studying.\nI played it cool and said to text me later to say whether she is coming or not. \n\nI'm not sure how to go forward, we got on really well last night and she suggested the date and location, is her excuse legit? Should I try to setup an alternate date when (if) she texts later or contact her tomorrow morning about a new date? I've read that you should be positive and let the other person know you definitely want to spend time with them. I want to show her I'm interested without seeming desperate to go out with her.", "summary": "I met a girl, swapped numbers, she asked on a date, now she might cancel. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3ccvob", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by watching the film Chappie", "post": "Background: I had some important things to get done today. I had to pay some extra rent on my place, sort out references and paperwork for a new job I'll be starting next month and a new house (I'll be moving away from where I currently live). I have also recently broken up with my SO of nearly four years, so unsurprisingly I'm an quivering, emotional wreck. \n\nI've always liked Neil Blomkamp's movies; District 9 was amazing and Elysium was ok. Chappie seemed like a fun-filled, action-packed hour and a half I thought. How wrong I was. I had *no* idea how emotional this film was. Without ruining the film, there's a lot of scenes when Chappie (a robot) learns about the world and starts asking some thought provoking questions about life. I got to a point in the movie and I totally lost it. I was sat there absolutely sobbing my eyes out for some bizarre reason. I'm a reserved guy, and considering the emotional impact my breakup had I did damn well on the crying front. It all came out during this movie. \n\nTwelve hours later, I have lost the place I was supposed be living at, I'm late sending a contract to my new job, and I forgot to book/schedule a bunch of other semi-important things.", "summary": "Watched Chappie, turned into an emotional wreck, forgot to do a bunch of stuff which basically set my life back a month."}
{"id": "t3_4fn7lc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [28 M] get over my long-term GF [25 F] of 3 years", "post": "So I'm reaching out here because I've been having a hard time essentially getting over my ex, who I felt was the one (it's nearly 3 weeks now since the break up). \n\nWithout warning, we broke up when I found out she had gotten close with someone else during her break (vacation), and she said that she felt different about me when she had come back. I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around having 3 years of good times, shared dreams, fears, and goals, and us working toward our future together, to be suddenly undone by one week being away. \n\nI feel devastated, and having already had trust issues prior due to childhood reasons, and a prior relationship, I feel like they've gotten worse (which I've opened up to her about before). She made me feel secure, loved, and wanted, especially since a lot of family oriented goals were brought up by her first. For everything to be suddenly turned upside down crushed me. \n\nI'm sure everyone feels this way after a breakup, but I'm just not sure how to handle the emotions that come in waves. You know, some days are better than others, but then I just have bad dreams about it nearly every other night. It also doesn't help that she's already moved on, and already in a committed relationship with this other person, and my mind keeps drifting to it.\n\nSo what do I do? I've been wrestling with the idea of reaching out to her somewhere down the line, and trying to seek closure, but I don't think that would be a good idea. I don't know. I'm not really used to this kind of rejection, much less from a relationship that felt like it was going great. Especially since it was someone I felt so comfortable opening up with, and had so much in common with, you know?", "summary": "Found out my ex of 3 years cheated on me with someone during her vacation (broken up for nearly 3 weeks now). How do I get over her? Do I reach out and seek closure sometime? "}
{"id": "t3_1hbpsp", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I (28F) just need to vent about my ex (30M) a little", "post": "So we were together 5 years and living together most of that time. We broke up two months ago because things were pretty bad and he had a lot of his own issues to deal with. He basically told me that I'm an amazing GF but he's just so fucked up right now in his life that he ends up being a terrible BF and I don't deserve that etc. He told me that he still loves me but he could barely keep his shit together let alone be a decent boyfriend. He just couldn't be in a relationship right now\n\nI understood this, and knowing his past and his problems this made a lot of sense. He was treating me pretty bad the last year of our relationship (i don't mean abusive) just inconsiderate and consumed with his own issues.\n\nWell, two days ago I found out he was seriously dating another woman and I feel absolutely shattered. The break-up was a good thing, for both of us, but I'm stunned he's already dating seriously. \n\nI feel hurt because I truly felt for him and the tough time he was going through, I cried with him, and now I feel like it was all bullshit. I feel like he actually just wanted to find someone better than me\n\nAnyway I've never felt more rejected in my life. I never thought it would affect me this way but I find myself utterly heartbroken.\n\nsomeone please tell me this gets better", "summary": "two months after breaking up because he couldn't be in a relationship, my ex is already starting one with someone else.  Rejection and sadness ensue"}
{"id": "t3_2y7kqy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not washing or brushing my teeth for 5 days whilst on a school trip.", "post": "So this didn't happen today like many other posts on here. This happened 5 years ago and I went on a residential at school. I arrived at my room with 6 other friends and we all unpacked. I noticed I didn't have my toiletries bag with me. I thought I must have not packed it by mistake. All I have to do is ask one of my friends if I could borrow their stuff. Only, I decide not to do that. \nIt was an exercise based trip with a lot of sports in the middle of the summer so it was very hot. I went swimming in the ocean, playing football (Soccer), caving etc. \nI speant all my money on the vending machine buying mints to try to keep my breath smelling bearable and I wore a hat at all times because I can imagine my hair was extremely greasy. \nI can't imagine how bad I smelt and nobody told me. Now here is the worst thing about it. My toiletries bag was with me the entire time.  It's just that when I had to pop out of our room when I was unpacking, one of my friends picked up the bag by mistake and instead of putting it back in my suitcase, they stuck it on the floor behind my suitcase and when I pushed my suitcase under the bed, it pushed the toiletries bag back to the wall. I didn't realise until I was packing to leave when I did a quick sweep to see if I left anything, to find that bag pushed up against the wall.", "summary": "I went on a sports trip without my toiletries, only to discover when I was leaving, I had it on me the whole time."}
{"id": "t3_1eomnt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I, 19[f], am in love with my best friend 20[m]. How can i get him to fall for me?", "post": "I have been in love with my best friend since year 2 of our friendship. He is the only person i trust in this world. \nWhenever he describes his perfect girl, he describes me, i don't even think he realizes it. He even goes so far to say \"I want to marry my best friend\". \nIts confusing, because he shows no interest in me thus-far. We get along great, we joke about & have fun.\nI've loved him for the past four years, when i first realized it, i let him know. But he said didn't want to ruin our friendship. Ever since then I've acted like my feelings aren't there. I even give him helpful realtionship advice.\nHe is the only person i know i could trust in this world. \n\nWhat i want to know is how can i make him fall for me too? How can i show him I'm right for him?", "summary": "I, 19[f] have been in love with my best friend 20[m] for the last 4 years. how can i show him im right for him?"}
{"id": "t3_1uizlh", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Dog is afraid of the basketball pole that's always been there? (hasn't been afraid of it previously)", "post": "I have a chihuahua (pug mix) dog, (1 yr/5 months old). We usually take him for walks around the gated apartment complex, where the gardens are at, the neighbors have a basketball hoop (the ones filled with water to keep it standing). One day they left a carpet out in the sun to dry & he quite like it (he was rubbing/nudging on it & I guess when the thing shook/or when I lifted him to hop on the carpet it scared him).  Ever since he hasn't been ANYWHERE near it, he doesn't want to even go outside anymore near that area (he'll just go potty & come right back inside).  I have tried carrying him over there and just holding him walking towards it, but right when I put him down he runs for his life back home. Tail is in between his legs, never seen him like that before.\n\nHe has never been afraid of going over there before at all, EVER, always had to go over there to potty on his usual spots, and has never had a problem until that incident...\n\nI have never seen him afraid of anything before like this.  Also, not sure if this is because recently a neighbor brought their friends dog over to play (near that area/female retriever/poodle mix but he's never seen her).\n\nI have tried to put snacks (in a trail) near there and have him slowly go out so he wouldn't be afraid, but once he eats all the snacks in the trail, he runs right back home.\n\nI have also attempted to put the snacks on the basketball hoop base & he has just eaten the food (or merely ignored it in panic/looking up all the time to see if anything is going to fall on him or something)...\n\nWhenever he leaves his safety area (home) he looks up & around but mostly up... How can I help him see that the basketball hoop is not dangerous? (ie. it's secure & won't fall over anytime soon even in gusty wind conditions)", "summary": "Dog afraid of basketball hoop that has always been there, was not before, need him to not be scared of it so that we can walk past that area or near it. How can I help him overcome that fear?"}
{"id": "t3_2i8pjp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18/F] ex BF[18/M] sent me a video of himself and I think I just cheated on my new BF [20/M]", "post": "(Background) I just started university this year and before summer I broke up with my HS boyfriend of 2 years. I was in love with him, he was my first in everything and he is undeniably good looking. Unfortunately he turned 18 before me and went to the bar and proceeded to cheat on me while drunk and that ended the relationship.\n\nI'm currently seeing someone I met during orientation and it's pretty serious, I like him, he's different but to be completely honest I'm not as attracted to him as I was with my ex. Anyways a couple nights ago he (my ex) commented on an old instagram picture of us, against my better judgement I replied and we started texting (I thought it was harmless) and it somewhat felt like old times.\n\nTwo nights ago I got a message from him and it was a video of him masturbating, of course I was shocked at first but that wore of pretty quickly and I got turned on, like really turned on. He called when I didn't message instantly and I guess we had facetime sex. I felt so horrible when I woke up.\n\nI can't explain it other than I'm still very much attracted to him, he is extremely good looking, I can't not be. I have been ignoring him since then. I had a date with the guy I'm currently seeing tonight but I cancelled because I can't face him, to me it counts as cheating and I was cheated on before and it almost broke me, so I pretended to be sick. I'm pathetic and weak. \n\nSidenote: I know he *(my ex) is flying back home for thanksgiving as well and  our parents are friends and I know they'll force me to atleast say hi to him so I can't hide. It's coming up soon and I'm just so confuse, I can't talk to any of my friends because I'm to embarrass. I don't know what to do.", "summary": "Ex sent me a video of himself masturbating and we had phone sex and now I feel awful, I'm just completely lost as to what to do next"}
{"id": "t3_2rh0y1", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "How do you stay healthy and \"resist temptation\" in a very unhealthy household?", "post": "(bit of a rant ahead) \n\nMy family is *extremely* unhealthy. Both of my parents are obese and my brother is one of those very picky eaters whose diet mainly consists of fast food, frozen junk, and just generally unhealthy meals/snacks. I've been trying for years to get my family to have a more healthy diet, but the most I've managed is getting them to finally buy some frozen vegetables (and I'm the only one who eats them). Needless to say, there isn't a lot of healthy food in my house.\n\nI've managed to avoid becoming extremely unhealthy, but I've always been \"chubby\". I don't know what to do. For a while I said \"fuck it\" and started buying a lot of my own food, but it took up too much room in the kitchen so I had to stop. I still cook almost all of my own meals.\n\nThe thing that frustrates me most is that I know first-hand how much easier it is to stay healthy when I'm not surrounded by junk food. When I studied abroad, living in a family who barely had junk on hand, things like chips and pizza were a *treat* like they're supposed to be. Unhealthy foods rarely crossed my mind.\n\nI know there's not really much else to it besides sucking it up and controlling myself, but any kind words or \"tips\" would be helpful. I've recently gained a fair amount of weight and feel like I have to take this very seriously before I start heading down the road of my parents. I have zero real support from anyone around me, so it's difficult.", "summary": "My house is filled with junk and I have no control over it. How do I avoid the abundance of quick junk foods and stick to a healthy (but quite limited) diet?"}
{"id": "t3_1w2t6v", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "she doesn't know i know -- girlfriend's adderall prescription", "post": "Well. I feel like an asshole due to the invasion of privacy but I'll explain that in a second...\n\nIt all goes back to when I was driving her car because I didn't have one at the time. I was looking for some kind of chapstick and found a bottle of adderall in the storage between the driver and passenger seat.\n\nI didn't say anything for a couple weeks because I had no idea how to approach it. I finally brought up the subject in a \"general\" way and she told me that she had taken it a couple times when she lived in NYC (1.5 or 2 years ago) but does not take it currently. I THEN brought it up a week later, telling her I FOUND IT by accident, and she said that her therapist had prescribed it but she won't be taking it and won't be getting it refilled.\n\nHere's the horrible part:\n\nI looked at her text messages because part of me didn't trust her. What did I find? A text message to her therapist from this past weekend asking the therapist to refill the prescription for adderall. \n\nHow the hell do I approach this? I only ask because I'm not sure if I should be worried. Do I even say anything or do I just respect privacy? We live together. I'm aware this is amazingly hypocritical but shouldn't she be sharing this with me? Or no? This is the best relationship that's ever happened to me... curious if anyone else has experienced something similar.", "summary": "girlfriend told me she wasn't taking adderall, then I found text message to her therapist asking for a refill of adderall this weekend"}
{"id": "t3_httrm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the hungriest you've ever really been?", "post": "[This] thread got me thinking about the \"disgusting\" things I'd eat if I was *really* hungry. I don't mean the kind of hungry when lunch is still two hours away and the coffee you had for breakfast isn't helping anymore and you groan to your coworker *\"I'm starving!\"* I mean hungry like you haven't had a bite to eat in days and you're not sure when you'll eat again.\n\nFor me, it was 1994 and I was 20 years old living with my first boyfriend. We often survived on end-of-day leftovers at our crappy fast food jobs. Business got slow and we both got fired from our jobs and we were just too dumb to think about the fact that the money we were spending on cigarettes and Dr. Pepper should *probably* be used for PB&J. \n\nHe got a part time job at KFC so he got at least one free meal a day, and I'd usually walk there to share that with him. It was almost Thanksgiving and his hours got cut back from 24 a week to 18, then 12, then they let him go altogether. Just before he left, he stole a bag of powdered mashed potatoes. (Desperate times, desperate measures?) We ate mashed potatoes for every meal for a week until it was just gone. Then there was nothing, and it was the day after Thanksgiving and all the food pantries were closed, and then it was the weekend and we were SO hungry.\n\nThose three days with nothing but water were probably the longest of my life. Strangely, after the 24 hour mark I stopped feeling hunger pains and just felt tired and moody. Any time I thought about food, I'd drink water or eat ice. (I found out several years later that while I had been starving, my boyfriend had been secretly visiting his family and having lunch or dinner with them. His family hated me, they felt I stole away their little boy, and there's no way they'd have fed me. My family wasn't talking to me because I was \"living in sin\" with him, so I didn't have backup like he did.)", "summary": "I once went 3 1/2 days with no food. Physically, it wasn't torture. Psychologically, I thought I'd *die* I never want to be that broke again."}
{"id": "t3_2w561s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] is leaving me [20M] for now because she's unhappy", "post": "Hi. My girlfriend and I have been together for three years. Recently, she has broken up with me. She says it is because she is unhappy. To be honest, I have been a shitty boyfriend lately. I love her and she says that she loves me. \n\nRecently, she has been talking to this other guy. However, she says she has been unhappy for three months. She says that she was planning on breaking up with me for a while. She says she is not breaking up with me for this guy. We still live together, she still likes to cuddle. I'm so confused. She. wants her space she says, and maybe in a few months we'll work it out. She doesn't want to work it out because she feels like she needs to focus on herself and that I've had too many chances. I love this girl. Do I keep fighting or just wait it out? I don't know.", "summary": "girlfriend of 3 years wants space. Probably another guy involved. Doesn't want to work it out. Live together. Do I keep fighting or wait or what"}
{"id": "t3_15u5rd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a [21M] in a relationship with a [44F]. But there is a problem on her side of things..", "post": "Not going to bore you but attempt to be straight to the point. \n\nI've been with her around 4 months now and I've met 2 of her children (13M/4M) and I know they're quite young and probably don't understand relationships yet but they're perfectly fine with it and welcome me with open arms (well, the 13 year old anyways, get on with him really well whereas the 4 year old just want to play all the time)\n\nAnyways, only 1 problem is that she has a 21M son who lives away at university most of the year but has been home for the past 15 days or so.\n\nNow I've gotten to see my girlfriend on occasions but not as much because of him being around, but the problem is she's afraid he'll go off the rails if he finds out about me with me being the same age. She said she feels so close to me and can't leave me because it'd break her heart but she's fighting a huge battle in my opinion and I don't want her to lose her son. The last thing I want to cause is a family rift. \n\nI want to be with her so much and I can't decide what to do or what to suggest to her. \n\nCan anybody help or advise me on what I could say/do?", "summary": "Girlfriend has a 21 year old son the same age as me and she's afraid if he finds out she'll lose him"}
{"id": "t3_l7t9y", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Well, I don't know where else to post this", "post": "So I recently moved to a new school and on my second day, met a girl who shall here forth be called \"Kim\". We became fast friends and I realized that was I was starting to develop feelings for her, but these feelings were stronger than I had ever had for anybody before. I was going a little out of my mind keeping my feelings for her in, and finally on Friday I told her my feelings and she essentially said that she gets it, whatever, and we carried on as usual. This was fine with me, and we actually talked all day Saturday. However, on Sunday she ignored me, and today she's been scattered in replying to my texts and other attempts to communicate. This is my first point. My second, is that after I started talking to Kim, she introduced me to her best friend, who we shall now call \"Ruby\". So I was pining after Kim, but at the same time I really wanted to make a connection with Ruby. We shared a lot more interests, but I still had stronger feelings for Kim. Now, when I was going crazy, Ruby really helped me out and gave me good advice. She has consistently given me good advice and been really helpful at any moment in our friendship. Once I told Kim about my feelings, she started to stand out to me. Ruby seemed so... different then. I realized that this entire time, I've tried to repress any feelings I had for her, as I didn't want anyone other than Kim. I have such a different feeling towards Ruby though. With Kim, just talking to her makes me happy, but whenever we fall out of contact, I just start to get deep emotional pain. But I can't really put a finger on my feelings for Ruby. She makes me happy, and I feel such a need to make her happy and protect her from anything. Right now, I am in immense conflict with this, and could really use some advice.", "summary": "I told the girl I have feelings for that I liked her, only to realize that I also had strong, yet different, feelings for our best friend."}
{"id": "t3_1xm5qv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My fiance [27/F] just broke it off with me [28/M] and I'm feeling lost and confused.", "post": "We've been dating for 3 years and we've been great friends since high school.  We got engaged in November and were about to lock up a venue for our wedding when everything came down.\n\nWe talked on Sunday because she had been stalling on signing the agreement with the venue, and she said she wasn't sure she was ready to get married.  She then said that she needed some time to get her head straight and then said that she wanted to take a break for a few months to figure out what she wants.\n\nWe got a house together in July, and things had been going great.  We were both happy.  I feel like she is scared of the responsibility and commitment that a relationship requires.\n\nI don't know how to get her back and I'm terrified that I won't be able to.  I love her to death and the last few days have been brutally tough.  Any advice or thoughts on this to help me out would be much appreciated.  I'm in the dark here.", "summary": "Friends since high school, dating 3 years, engaged for 5 months, fiance broke it off saying she needs time to figure out what she wants.  Feeling lost."}
{"id": "t3_13n6ou", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I dont know who I am", "post": "Not in the amnesiac sense.  I just dont know what makes me me anymore.  I always remember being the smartest person in a room, but now with my new job, my inexperience makes me the dumbest person around.  I used to be really in to Jiu Jitsu, I started in college.  I had the same partner for four years, and we even started dating.  Then she went to a different section of the united states, and I started trying to set my self up to be able to move to her.  She left me, and married her instructor in like a three month span.  I dont know what to do, it almost feels like there is no point to do the martial art anymore.  I always prided myself in being in the number one fighter of my social circle.  I know, being half a country away, they arent in my circle anymore, but as the very least my ex is a fellow Redditor. (so of course im using a throwaway.)  I cant find new employment, I cant move out of my parents house.", "summary": "all the things about myself I took pride in/was hopeful about, all the things that were a the defining aspects of me, are gone and failed."}
{"id": "t3_23n0cc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my SO [30 M] 1.5 years, Those who have been on a break due to depression/needing space, and really love each other. How did you make it work? How do you navigate a break?", "post": "My SO (30 M) and I (23 F) have decided to take a break due to his holding back for months that he was getting depressed. I have had mental issues my entire life that include OCD, Anxiety and Depression so I understand how hard it was to him and where it was coming from. \n\nHe didn't want to lose me from his life, and I didn't want to lose him. We love the hell out of each other.\n\nNeither of us have had a \"break\" before, and we want it to work/be beneficial.\n\nas he said \"I want to look back on this one day with you and agree that it brought us closer and made us stronger\". \n\nSo, we decided that the onus of contact is on him, and he calls me twice a day to talk. We met up today {had the conversation on Friday} because he *really* wanted to see me. I'll admit i wanted to see him too.\n\nSo those who have been on a break, and it was successful please advise!\n\nWhat were your ground rules, how long was your break, what do you *do* to make sure its successful?", "summary": "SO and I , very much in love, needed a break to deal with Depression and OCD {His depression, my OCD}. How do we navigate this?"}
{"id": "t3_32r9i3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23M] friend [20F] invites/begs me to accompany her on unnecessary shopping trips then asks me to pay for gas.", "post": "I come from the city so I'm a veteran public transportation rider. I attend a University where the public transportation isn't in abundance but still reliable. \n\nRecently my friend has gotten a new car and in excitement, has been using it frequency. This has led to her asking, and later begging me to join her on trips to the store/mall/anywhere off campus. \n\nAt first, I agreed to these trips since she was still in that \"freedom\" phase of owning a car. After a few weeks, she'd started demanding gas money for her service. \n\nI would normally pay for all my goods and services, but I'm baffled at this. She invites me on this little runs willingly, and mostly to places I do not need/care to go. I have told her often that I would rather use the public transportation as my University student fees pay for it. When I turn her down, she asks again or passive aggressively comments on not spending time with her. \n\nI do not have a lot of money compared to her. She comes from a rich family and has a fair bit of cash on her at all times. \n\nI do not understand the underlying issue or how to address it.", "summary": "Well off friend invites, then begs me to go on unneeded shopping trips. When I do go, she demands I pay for gas. "}
{"id": "t3_13x5tl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I stay or should I go (24f)", "post": "Hello reddit. Sorry for the throwaway, my boyfriend (m27) is the one who introduced me to reddit, so I'm sure he'd find this post if I used my real account. \n\nMy SO and I have been dating for a year and a half. We met at work and saw each other pretty much everyday. Recently he took a new job about 200 miles away so we see each other about every 3 weeks.\n\nMy dilemma is that he WILL NOT talk about the future. Ever. Not at all. Nothing. And it's hard to be in this LDR without any plan of physically being in the same location again or even knowing that thats something we both want. When we were with each other all the time the future didn't seem to matter as much. But now that he's gone and we're trying to stay together I feel like I need some reassurance as to WHY we're engaging in a LDR with no foreseeable end. Some reason that it's worth doing it.\n\nI have tried talking to him about it. He mentioned that he didn't want to be one of those people who start taking the next step in their relationship because they reach a certain age. He also said he can't tell me he knows he wants to be with me because he doesn't know, and that he doesn't know what will happen in the future. \n\nI just don't know if this is a waste of my time and energy. I know that if it was one of my friends asking me for advice I would tell them to let him go and move on if he can't make up his mind about you. But for some reason it's harder to see when it's your own life. I know he loves me and I know he's indecisive about almost everything else. Maybe he's taking me sticking by him for granted? I just don't know.\n\nSo should I stay or should I go? Any insight or advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Long term, newly long distance boyfriend won't make any plans for the future. I think I might be wasting time and energy."}
{"id": "t3_17upp6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My husband is suddenly way more into my dirty asshole than I am anywhere near comfortable with and I don't know what to do. (M24, F31)", "post": "We've been married for four years, together for five. Suddenly all he wants to do is sniff my asshole and armpits regardless of when I last showered. I love him a lot of want to make him happy but it makes me feel so fucking gross. I've tried to be GGG about it and just let him but it really turns me off and the last thing I want is to have sex with him afterward. I just find myself getting angry and feeling used.\n\nThese days it's like he hugs me and cuddles me and them gets on his knees and shoves his face into my ass crack, or he hugs me and tries to shove his hand in my ass crack. I asked him if he could maybe build up to that instead of going for it right out of the gate but he doesn't seem amenable to it. I've started to turn him down every time he reaches for me because I don't want to be sniffed like a dog. I don't even want him to touch me anymore.\n\nHe confessed that he really wanted this when we were drunk one night and I said I would try it but I just can't get into it. He wants to stick his tongue into my asshole then kiss me and it makes me want to fucking vomit. He's hinted at wanting to try piss play too. I have absolutely no interest in that.\n\nI don't know what to do. I love him and I feel like I've tried to be as GGG about this as I can but fuck. There is SO MUCH kinky shit I'd be happy to try but why does it have to be this? Bodily wastes and armpit stank just have no appeal for me. I mean if he wanted to do all this shit fresh after a shower, sure, but he doesn't. He seems upset when I shower before bed now.\n\nSeriously, at a total loss here. When the fuck did I marry Napoleon?", "summary": "Husband suddenly only wants dirty asshole play and armpit sniffing, it grosses me out; what do?"}
{"id": "t3_4qj5ij", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need insight... Is my(21F) boyfriends(24m) view on marriage normal?", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend nearly 3 years, lived together for two.\n\nI've pretty much been ready to get engaged for the last few months, he is not,  which is ok because we are still young, don't really wanna rush into things and I'm ok with waiting. In pretty sure he's my soulmate.  \n\nLiving together has been smooth sailing, we just signed a lease for another year. We're both tidy enough, split chores evenly, finances in order. Normal stuff. We don't really fight. \n\nAnyways, we were talking about marriage and the future and he thinks that being married will be hard. I asked why he thought that and he said living with another person is hard. I asked him if living with me currently was hard, he said no. This didn't make sense to me obviously. So he goes on to say that after about 4 yrs of being together then \"biologically\" staying together in a marriage is just about having \"sheer willpower\", as if it's a struggle staying together longer than that. \n\nOk I know marriage can be hard, I watched my parents stay in a shitty marriage for years with constant fighting. I know things change after the honeymoon phase (pretty sure we are past that by now). But I don't think people only stay together because of \"willpower\". It kinda makes me feel sad that he has that expectation of me in the future. \n\nIs there any truth to this point of view? Is he mistaken? I just don't understand where he got that idea, his parents have been together for 27 years and are very happy it seems. \n\nAm I just naive to think marriage won't be that bad? I mean we already live together, how much more will things change?", "summary": "my boyfriend thinks being married to me will be so hard it will take sheer willpower to stay with me. Anyone have an opinion?"}
{"id": "t3_2ol54n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my Girlfriend [19 F] of 1 month. I think it might be me, but she's acting differently. What gives?", "post": "I'll keep this brief, but when I had met my girlfriend we would hang out non stop, text often, etc.. Sadly her grandfather had passed, so we put things on hold for a couple weeks.\nNow she's been a pain to text, and to try to hang out with. However there are a few days where she'll text me and ask to hang out. I understand that she doesn't like to text much, but say last night; she invited me out to an even with her family, we had a great time and I had texted her that I did last night, and to thank her family for inviting me. I got nothing back, which means she probably was asleep, so I figured I text her and ask her to hang out today since I know we both didn't have work. Yet, 8 hours later still nothing.\n\nWhat gives? Sometimes she'll text me a lot, so I'm a bit confused. Should I try not to message her until she messages me?", "summary": "New girlfriend sometimes goes days without texting me more than a couple of things, which is a complete change from weeks prior. Haven't hung out as much either.(an hour or two a week)"}
{"id": "t3_23dpox", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Any advice for which college program? Information technology. I need someone with experience in the field.", "post": "Hello my name is Daniel. I am 24 years old and i am going to be going to college for the first time! I am finally able to go as independent so now is the time to get help with tuition. I start in the fall!\n\nI would like a little guidance from the community here. I decided to go to a community college first, as to not load myself up with debt. I am looking to go into the tech sector. \n\nThese are what i'm looking at:\n\nSoftware Development A.A.S. Degree\nI am looking at computer programming #1. I am not the most creative person, but i can definitely create something with the correct inspiration. And.... i love computers and solving problems.\n\nWith an Associates in Applied Science, i should be able to get work pretty quickly if i do well if what I've researched is correct.\nBut if i we're to attain this degree, what can i do to advance my education and achieve a bachelor's degree or get a better job? Is a bachelor's even needed to move up in the industry?\n\nComputer Support and Network Administration A.A.S.\nI'm also good with people and would love working in a field that is actively working with people to solve problems.\n\nIs there way to advance my education past the AAS in this field? What can i do to advance my education and achieve a bachelor's degree or get a better job in networking? Is a bachelor's even needed to move up in the industry?", "summary": "Based on your knowledge, experience, and expertise, what would be your opinion to assist me in my ignorance on what i should do in my college plans to set myself up for work now and advancement later?"}
{"id": "t3_4ah847", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19 F) am scared of smothering and loving my bf (19 M) too much. ((End of honeymoon stage?))", "post": "My problem is extremely simple, and has been on my mind a little bit. \n\nThey say that after a while of dating and being together you start to ween out of the honeymoon stage and start to have a simple relationship with one another. But we have been dating for almost a year now, next month, and I feel like that stage hasn't ended for me yet, though it does seem to have with him.\n\nI go to school about 2 hours away from him, so we only see eachother now and again on weekends. But when we are together, I tend to love on him all day. I watch him play games, cuddle, watch movies/shows with him. Even when we hang out with his friends or are in public, I tend to want to hold his hand and give him kisses.\n\nHe on the other hand is of course past this. He has said that he both likes and dislike my lovey-doveiness. Sometimes he loves it because he feels important/special/wanted. Othertimes it is kind of annoying or clingy.\n\nBut I'm just not sure what to do about it. I always want to show him how much I love him and how happy he makes me, but I also don't want to be a smothering gf.", "summary": "I love on/smother my boyfriend a lot and want to know how to ease back on the love, but not completely stop."}
{"id": "t3_2vz2lx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by answering my phone", "post": "Actually happened yesterday. So theres this girl I've met on the internet and we were already chatting for a couple of months. She was the kinda girl that *really* liked talking on the phone. I told her many times that I usually don't like talking on my phone that much but she kept calling me two to three times a day. So one day she couldn't hear me, no idea why. I tried sending voicemails and other stuff but it seemed like my microphone was broken and i told her that. Later that day I just tried restarting my phone and everything worked again, thing is, I never told her that. I lied to her and said something about a repair that would cost 60\u20ac and I didn't want to spend my money for that. Fast forward a few weeks, She asked me out on a date. I've never seen her as a potential girlfriend but decided to meet her anyways just so see how it goes. So the date was going meh, and when she went to see the toilet I wrote my friend a message that he should call me about an importent appointment I forgot to get myself out of this date a quickly as possible. She came back and two minutes later I recieved the call from my friend. Afte I exchanged some words with my friend, I realized what I just did. The girl looked at me as if I just killed somebody. At this point, I knew there was no going back. I lied to her because I didn't want to spend time talking to her and she knew that now too. She looked pretty angry, ran out of the restaurant and I haven't heard anything from her since. Needlesly to say, I'm not going to see her again.", "summary": "Told a girl my phone doesn't work anymore, just so I don't have to talk to her again. Answered a phonecall at my first date with her."}
{"id": "t3_rmvdh", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Can loseit help me lose 15 pounds?", "post": "I just bought my prom dress online, and to my horror I found that it didn't fit properly. Sadly, the dress went through 3 countries before I got it and so the deadline for sending the dress back is long past. Therefore I'm hell-bent on making the dress fit. I want to lose about 15 pounds before prom in June, and wondered if loseit could help me!\n\nI'm 17, F, 5 7\" and about 185 pounds. In other words overweight. I've always been of the muscular type with a somewhat bulky (\u0ca0_\u0ca0) upper body, and I want to lose fat, and not so much muscle. I got access to a modest gym with the most basic equipment, and now that it's getting warmer I'm also open to doing stuff outside. What I *don't* have access to, however, is proper food as I live in a host family as a poor student. I therefore can't afford to buy a lot of fancy food.\n\nDoes loseit have some healthy tips as to what what options I got with food, healthy snacks and stuff, and what do do in the gym to reach my goals? :)", "summary": "F, 17 years old, 5 7\", 185 lbs, with access to gym, needs help to lose 15 lbs in 2 1/2 months"}
{"id": "t3_4lxdax", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(15m) want to talk to girl(15f) I have a crush or interest in..but..", "post": "Sorry for horrible writing. Not my best work, but I'm tired and I'm about to go to sleep.\n\nI go to a small highschool only for freshman (Also known as a ninth grade center) and There's this girl that caught my eye. I don't know her name because I don't have her for any classes, but we see each other every morning and make eye contact, but never talk. In fact, I don't think I've seen her talk with anybody before. She's bilingual so I'm starting to wonder if bad English is the reason why or if she has no interest in meeting anyone or if she's mute or other reasons. I'm over thinking this, but to explain why I'm over thinking this I should talk about myself a little and continue.\n\nI'm a shy guy.. Like a really shy guy with anxiety and shit i don't want to get into, but I've never really had a lot of friends hardly any my entire life, and always was insecure about myself and didn't want to bother anybody with my presence so yeah I basically am a mess with few friends and I'd like to meet this cute girl and Maybe ask her out if she seems interested.. Though there is a bit of a problem. School is about to end and I can only see her in the mornings for a couple minutes and I feel like I wouldn't have time to introduce myself enough to make her feel comfortable enough to exchange social media to talk outside of school so I don't know what to do or what to say or how to even get the courage to walk up to her, introduce myself and Strike up a conversation without messing up or worse.\n\nAny ideas or tips or like suggestions on what I should say or how to uh basically not fuck up.\n\nP.S highly unlikely but paranoid she's reading this.\nP.S.S. throwaway because I'm ashamed that I'm making this because of a simple situation when most things on this thread are serious..", "summary": "See cute girl, Want to meet her, Asking reddit for help on what to say or how to have courage because I'm a pathetic loser."}
{"id": "t3_rjg7p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My gf (19) never comes in to the liquor store of a guy we know to buy alcohol. Is this legit? (I'm 19) Note: We live in Michigan, drinking age 21 here.", "post": "My gf and I go to the liquor store of a guy we know about once a week, and I usually go in to buy beer or whatever we're drinking. It never really bothered me until recently that she always sits in the car. The guy we know is a mutual friend's friend. I asked her about it a couple of months ago, and she said she just didn't want to get in any trouble. \n\nAt the time, this was somewhat legitimate because she was here on an H-4 visa (her dad is here on an H-1 visa and her status is dependent on him). However, about a month ago, she received her green card. I asked her why she couldn't come in with me to pick out our drinks now and she still says the same thing. \n\nNaturally, I point out that we would be in the same amount of trouble if we got caught, which we wouldn't anyways since we've been buying consistently for well over a year from this guy. I know there's no sense of both of us risking our necks to get alcohol, but it annoys the shit out of me that she seems to think that I should have to go inside to buy our drinks because she doesn't want to get in trouble. \n\nI don't mind paying for the drinks since I get paid a lot more than her, but I can't help but feel like she thinks she's more important than me or something because she doesn't mind if I risk my neck to go get alcohol, but she absolutely refuses to even come inside with me.\n\nInput? Advice? What should I say or do? Or just suck it up?", "summary": "I have a problem with the fact that my girlfriend wants me to take the risk of buying alcohol that she would not take herself."}
{"id": "t3_42vl6c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my gf [19 F] of 6 months, is it bad of me to reconsider the relationship due to her low sex drive?", "post": "Me and my gf met on tinder and have been dating for ~6 months now. The start of the relationship was fun, and best of all was the sex. We both loved it. She was a lot more experienced than I am, she has slept with 8 people where I have only slept with 2 (current gf included) but that was never an issue.\n\nAbout 2 months into the relationship we both moved cities for university, coincidentally we had both been accepted by the same one and now live just minutes away from eachother, as opposed to the 45 minute drive before hand. But then the relationship changed - she started getting more jealous, we argued a lot and it seemed like we were going to lose eachother but we both stuck through it. \n\nWe had to start searching for a house in the private sector rather than in University accommodation for second and third year study, and I felt like it would be sensible to get separate houses with friends just to be safe, as we are in a new relationship and this was my first 'real' relationship, but when I told her she took it as an offence, like I was trying to get away from her. It took me a while to reason with her, and though she still doesn't agree with me, she is accepting of my decision.\n\nWe've been going steady for a month or two now without arguing but the relationship is different, there's no spark. We seem to just sit and watch tv, and the sex is down to about once or twice a fortnight. I know that can be classed as the honeymoon stage passing but the sex just feels forced. Like we only do it because we haven't in a while. I have tried a few times to mention that I would like to have more sex but she doesn't seem as enthusiastic. Am I a bad person for saying this? We are happy together but this has been bugging me for a while.", "summary": "gf's sex drive has dropped dramatically after moving to the same university, is it bad of me to reconsider the relationship over this??"}
{"id": "t3_3hwspf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What to do about SO's terrible family?", "post": "SO (21M) and I (20F) have been together 5 years and talk about marriage somewhat often. We love each other very much and are always happy thinking of our futures together. However, every time I think about our future especially the idea of a wedding, I get worried due to his family. They are emotionally (and on occasion physically) abusive people who take their hatred of each other out on their \"unwanted\" son. They have caused horrible psychological scarring in my SO and I hate being around them. They've never been very kind/receptive to me and I get terrible anxiety whenever I have to be around them. They are your purest form of white trash. SO knows how awful they are and has frankly said that maybe we should just never tell them if/when we get married. Just wondering if anyone out there has had to deal with a similar situation and how to handle the possibility of a wedding without one of the families involved?", "summary": "SO has problematic trashy family that we don't want to be involved with. Advice on future wedding planning/living without them?"}
{"id": "t3_i3u3p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit. What is your scariest vacation story?", "post": "Personally, I recently visited the Bahamas. We did an all-day scooter rental and covered the whole Nassau island...that is until my scooter broke down. I was at one of the private beaches, and asked a bus driver if I could use his phone to call the rental place. He looked me dead in the eye and said \"No, but let me tell you something. If you know what's good for you, you'll leave this beach immediately.\" everyone in the beach was looking at me with wide eyes. Needless to say I rigged a towing system from my buddy's scooter and got the hell out of there.", "summary": "Rental scooter broke down on a private beach in the bahams, was told to get the hell out ASAP."}
{"id": "t3_152pru", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(24) really appreciate my gf(22), but I don't know if I'm wasting her time.", "post": "We've been (me M/24, her F/22) together for almost a year now and I've been very happy and excited in the beginning. I appreciate her, because she likes the whole me with every flaw I have. It's worth to note that I'm her first boyfriend.\n\nThe problem is that I really don't think that I love her as much as I did before and she certainly loves me way more as I far as I can see it.\n\nI think I might be wasting her time, because I'm constantly thinking of being with other women, but I would never act on it, these are just thought, but they're there nonetheless. I really think this is unfair to her on my part. \n\nI had only 2 relationships in my life counting this one too, so I'm not experienced one bit. A few people with whom I discussed my problems said that these are not good signs. **What's your opinion?** Would you break up so you don't waste her time or try to work it out somehow?\n\n*Thank you for reading!", "summary": "Been together with girlfriend for almost a year, I'm her first. I'm constantly thinking of being with other women, but would never act on it. I think this is unfair to her."}
{"id": "t3_1c2ssu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need Help Understanding Relationship M[21] with F[21]", "post": "Relationship time: 5 months\n\nHey /relationships,\n\nSo I met this girl at OSU earlier this year, and we both fell deeply in love.  This was my first real relationship, and I was smitten completely - I fell hard for her, and she did the same for me.  Now, at around 7 days, she said I love you, and I returned it, for I really thought that I felt that way.  Around 2 months in, we were talking about marriage and getting engaged, and formulating plans together for the future.  \n\nNow here is the issue.  I no longer am sure about getting engaged or married.  I definitely still want to be with her, but I am finally coming to my senses and realizing that 6 months is way, way, Way too soon to get engaged, and that I want to know her for a few years before I am comfortable with being married.  We're just beginning to get to know each other and commit to each other for life right now would just be laying the grounds for a potentially unhappy and unsuccessful marriage.\n\nWith all of that being said, I know the general consensus will just be to talk about it, and keep both parties on the same page regarding the relationship, and this is what I would do, if I knew that she wouldn't freak out completely.  She has deep abandonment issues and trust issues which we have been working through together, and I know she would view this as a violation of her trust and love.  I've always assumed honesty is the best policy, but I'm just not sure about what to do in this circumstance.", "summary": "5 months relationship between 21 year olds - moved way too fast at the beginning - want to slow things down massively but not sure about girlfriends mental state regarding the change.  "}
{"id": "t3_31pehd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Going on a date in an hour.. Super nervous need help", "post": "I got out of a bad relationship two months ago that lasted almost a year. I haven't been on a first date for over a year.. I met this girl on Tinder and made it clear I wasn't looking to just hook up. We've been talking and share a lot in common, down to the fact we both smoke pot and love cartoons from the 90's. I've been pretty smooth on the phone but in real life I'm very shy. I think I've gotten a little less shy since I got out of my last relationship, but I really wanna wow this girl. We're going to see the new Fast and Furious movie.  We're both passive people, as I'm very shy and nice and she seems to be just like me in that she doesn't like to be the one making decisions. I don't like making decisions either, but I made the decision of when and what movie to see. What should I do?", "summary": "going on a date, haven't been on one in a year. What should I do? I'm super nervous for reference I'm 22 and she's 23."}
{"id": "t3_1j3bai", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (28/f) girlfriend opened up to me about her past and now I (31/m) feel like I've lost respect for her. I want to let it go and stop judging her. Any advice is appreciated.", "post": "An amazing woman entered my life a few months ago. We hit it off right away and have been discovering new facets to our chemistry ever since. It's been mind-blowingly great in just about every way. She is absolutely crazy about me, and I felt the same about her until she recently opened up to me about her past. She told me that she's been with tons of guys, saying that it was often an 'obligation' for having been taken out on a couple dates, that she could easily separate the emotional and physical aspects of sex.\n\nI really feel that I've lost a great deal of respect for her, and I don't fully understand why. I've always associated such feelings with jealousy, insecurity, or mistrust, but this doesn't feel like that to me. It just feels like I think less of her. I want so badly to let it go. She's absolutely incredible in so many ways that are important to me. \n\nMy brain tells me that feeling this way is immature, stupid, and extremely unfair to her. I have a past too. I have no right to expect anything of her before we met. But her past is of the type that I have specifically avoided in my own life, generally feeling that it was a matter of self-respect. I've always thought it was important to reserve sex for meaningful relationships. \n\nAm I being overly judgmental? Is any part of what I'm feeling rational?\n\nHow do I forgive her past? Maybe forgive isn't the right word, because I don't necessarily think she's done anything wrong. But how do I let it go?", "summary": "The best relationship of my life fell into my lap and my inability to get over her past is threatening to ruin it."}
{"id": "t3_49wvak", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25] with my \"exclusive\" FWB/GF [27 F] three months... ignoring me while she's out of town for spring break.", "post": "Everything was fantastic before she left, like I literally had one of the best times of my life with her early this week. \n\nThe night before she left I asked her if were exclusive, and she asked if I was worried she was going to cheat on the trip. I played it as calm as possible \"a girl is going to do what she's going to do,  I can't stop you either way... but I like you and.. blah blah blah...\" Although it wasn't fully aired out, the cuddling/kissing combined with \"just trust me baby I'm not gonna hurt you...\" talk made me feel like we were. \n\nIDK, I thought we were cool We had sex since I asked her that...  then she went out of town and I haven't heard from her since day one. \n\nLike she sent me a trivial  text, I responded 5 minutes later, then didn't get anything else for over 24 hours, when I texted her again... a \"what'sup, having fun\".\n\nNo response, going on three days now since I last heard from her Tuesday morning.\n\nI don't text her again right? It would be too clingy? Is it time to start assuming the worse?  \n\nWould a \"are you okay...?\" kind of text leaning on I'm worried for her safety be a good thing to try?", "summary": "G/F on spring break (visiting family), ghosting me for about 72 hours now. Should I text/call her and just say I'm concerned about her safety? Or stay quite? I like her a lot..."}
{"id": "t3_2b0rpg", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[PA] Serving an \"underager\" as a Bartender", "post": "I'm a bartender at a restaurant/bar which can get pretty busy on friday night.  So, we have a bouncer who cards everyone at the door.  As he is the one in charge of this process, I'm assuming, probably incorrectly, that he assumes liability for anyone allowed in underage. This carding includes looking at the IDs as well as swiping.  PA IDs, or so I'm told, are generally difficult to fake so if he gives them the okay, I don't usually double check.  \n\nApparently, two girls came in one Friday night and the one was underage.  We only discovered this because the girl's father came in and was complaining that she got served because she's only 20.  Assuming he reports this, what kind of legal trouble could I be looking at?", "summary": "Bouncer let in and stamped an underage girl, I didn't know and served her.  What could I be looking at?"}
{"id": "t3_2c0ju1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Single again and lonely :/", "post": "I realized today that I (21 f) seriously have an issue with dependency. My ex bf (26 m) broke up with me about 2 weeks ago. It was a LDR and kind of feels like we broke up for no reason. I went to visit regularly but I suppose it wasn't enough for him. It hurts even more because we haven't kept in contact even though we're \"Friends.\" We were only together for about 9 months if you count the period of time we started talking. Right before getting into that relationship, I was with another guy (22 m) for about 3 years. We also don't keep in contact.  And before that, I was kind of with a guy (23 m) that was in jail for about a year. Basically, I haven't been completely single in 4+ years. How do I get my mind off my exs and guys in general? I don't really want a relationship anytime soon. Was considering a fwb but I feel like I deserve more than just being someone's fuckbuddy. I don't really have friends so I feel stuck. What should I do?", "summary": "haven't been single in more than 4 years. I don't want really want another relationship but I don't wanna be so alone."}
{"id": "t3_3khqhu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my (friends with benefits?) [18 F] confused.", "post": "So let me start off by saying I've been \"seeing\" this girl for about two weeks. She's sweet, a total tomboy, and she's real cool. Now normally I fall head over heels for girls, but after our first date she made it clear she wasn't necessarily looking to date. Fine by me, I'm in a phase of my life where I'm fine without a girlfriend, but the problem is I'm a virgin and plan to stay so (until I find someone I love enough to give it away). That makes hookups difficult. This girl has slept over on weekends, and I've gone out drinking with her friends, it's a good time, but I'm realizing now that I kind of want a relationship. It doesn't have to be with her, but I care about her, and she had one of those drunk spill all moments the other night. She basically said that she cares about me way too much and wants a relationship but is scared and so she'll never date me. She said however she would date me if we eventually had sex. This scared the crap out of me. If you like me, date me because you like me, not because you want my sex. It's so confusing.\n\nOn top of this, there are two girls who I know for a fact would love for me to ask them out. I could do this as I don't have any immediate attachments to the girl I'm fwb'ing with (if you can call it that), and they're both definitely looking for a relationship. It's strange because I usually fall head over heels for the girls I'm seeing very quickly, but this time it's been different. I'm just really confused. I think I'm going through a phase or something. Thanks guys. Appreciate help in advance.\n\n-Kirby1056", "summary": "Am friends with benefits (for lack of a better word because we just fool around) with a girl who doesn't want to date me. I want a relationship. Other girls want said relationship with me. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2ip0wi", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Interested in my ex's good friend", "post": "I dated a girl who we'll call Jane for 8 months and was very in love with her. To make a long story short, over the summer we broke up and I was devastated but, as is part of life, I had to move on. So I started talking to other people and the one person in specific I started talking to was her friend - let's call her Nicole. So Nicole and I got to talking a lot and rather quickly I became really interested in her. So one day, I invited her over to my house thinking that we would just hang out as friends because that's all I really thought of it but things started getting pretty flirty. I brought attention to a vodka bottle I had in the cabinet twice not for the purpose of convincing her to drink some with me but just pointing it out. The second time she suggest we have some so we did. We both got a bit tipsy and nearly kissed but instead both decided that on account of Jane that would not be a good idea for either of us because I admittedly still had feelings for Jane. Despite this decision, I continued flirting with Nicole and she continued flirting with me. We started hanging out a lot and cuddling and doing essentially anything but actually kissing. Again, to make a long story short, over the past few months we've hung out a lot and flirted a lot and cuddled but we keep getting stopped by something. Despite knowing that this thing is Jane I decided to ask Nicole today. So we went for a walk and talked and she said that if it were not for Jane she would definitely be interested in me but that she can't do that to Jane. I want to have something more than a friendship with Nicole but because of my relationship with Jane which, to restate, she ended Nicole doesn't see that happening. I basically want to know if there is anything I could do to convince Nicole otherwise.", "summary": "I am interested in my ex-girlfriends good friend and she has said she would be interested in me were it not for my ex. Looking for advice on how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_zyblb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "my SO [f/21] was talking to another guy and lied to me. what is a fair response/continued actions?", "post": "My SO and I live together. together for about a year. SO has had a friend who she claimed to be nothing more than a friend. I have meet him and he seemed like a nice enough guy. For a time she talked to him all the time to the point of neglecting me. I confronted her about how I feel and the problem seemed to be done. but i never fully trusted their interactions. A few days ago he sent her a text and I read it. Leading me to read the rest only to find that they have been sexting back and forth with a lot of detail. I don't know how long this has been going on. The only redeeming fact was that they never talked about cheating. My SO and I had just had a great week where we had found a whole new level of trust(Opening up about our sexuality etc.) So naturally I feel hurt and betrayed etc. In trying to show that I could still trust her I told her that they could still talk as friend. We are working on it and I forgave her. She is doing a much better job than I expected trying to show me how much she loves me and that it was just stupid text that went to far. But i can't stop wondering what they are talking about? Am I in the wrong to ask to see their text's back and forth? I don't know if i'm Overeating to this whole thing and obsessing or I'm right to be so paranoid about them. thanks reddit.", "summary": "SO was talking dirty in great detail via text to guy she insisted was just friend. Lied about it etc. Am I wrong to want ask to see current conversations and be so paranoid?"}
{"id": "t3_1p7xbz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my girlfriend [26 F] of 3.5 years has been supporting me financially and emotionally since losing my job a few months ago. How can I show her how much I appreciate her?", "post": "Today was a tough day in particular, after waiting three months on what I thought was a very positive interview, I realized I did not get an offer to my top choice of jobs. I have been applying to many jobs, as many as I can, with a few bites but nothing especially promising. We didn't know me being unemployed would last this long, which has been taxing on both of us.\n\nMy girlfriend has been here for me: financially, emotionally, and everything in between. I know it must get frustrating for her, especially after so many negatives on my job front. I clean around the apartment, go grocery shopping, do laundry, and do my best to make sure she comes home after work and is able to relax. \n\nHow can I show her how much I care about her, and how much I appreciate everything that she's done and is doing for me? I want her to know, especially after being dealt this particularly huge blow. Lord knows she deserves to feel special.", "summary": "Didn't get my top choice of job, girlfriend has been supporting me along the way, and want to show her I care."}
{"id": "t3_3jp98l", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25/F] getting married, bridesmaid [25/F] won't get back to me!", "post": "Hello,\n\nSo I [25/F] am getting married in about 2 months. I had planned to have 3 bridesmaids and a maid of honor. However, one of my bridesmaids [25/F] has been really out of the loop (not answering calls/texts/emails/fb messages). This was also the case when I was trying to ask her to be a bridesmaid (a process which took months to get in touch with her!). My fianc\u00e9 and I recently moved to another state, so most of our people from our wedding party are from out of town (which I understand limits what they can do to help); however, all my bridal party have gotten matching dresses (of different shades of blue) and she still hasn't even responded to any of their messages either. She always comes up with lame excuses (her phone broke/ she got a new computer- which SHE WOULD STILL BE ABLE TO CHECK FB MESSAGES AND EMAILS!). \n\nShe has been a very close friend since we were young (since 11 years old!). I love her to death and we have always had the kind of relationship were we don't need to talk or hang out every weekend to be able to maintain our friendship (we have always been there for any crisis and told each other everything even after months of not talking). I feel like she is really dropping the ball on this tough\u2026 It's not like I'm asking her to help with ANY PREPARATIONS for the wedding, just get ANY dress that is blue... I would even help financially but she doesn't respond to ANYTHING.\n\nI have thought about asking her to step down because I find it really rude of her BUT HOW if I can't even get in touch with her?! I am also scared about messing up the friendship\u2026 but\u2026 I think she already has.", "summary": "Bridesmaid [25/F] won't get back to me for weeks and has lame excuses. Known her since we were 11 years old\u2026 Should I ask her to step down as bridesmaid?"}
{"id": "t3_3guzht", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend is turning 21 and wants me (21M) to throw her a party. How do I break the news that no one will show up?", "post": "Birthdays have always been hard on my girlfriend.  She's had a few parties as a child where no one showed up, and since moving states in the middle of high school she hasn't made close friends.\n\nHere at college, she tries hard to make friends. She talks well to people on a superficial basis but doesn't have any real friends.  She's never been invited to a college party and has often missed out on many typical activities.\n\nWe've been together for 3 years, since freshman orientation.  I don't have friends but I'm happy that way.  I like keeping to myself if I'm not spending time with her.  Since she's naturally extroverted, she spends her free time with me, or at club meetings trying to connect to people.  \n\nShe's asked if I could put together a small party so I invited some acquaintances, my roommates, etc.  everyone said no.  I gave the invites well in advance too.  I don't know how to break the news to my girlfriend, she's been so excited.  She thought providing free food and drink would be a great way to make friends.  But people don't want to come for even that.  What can I do?", "summary": "My friendly but friendless girlfriend wanted me to throw a 21st birthday party for her, but no one accepted.  How do I still make this a special day?  How do I tell her without crushing her?"}
{"id": "t3_4r447m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18F] \"girlfriend\" is acting pretty weird with me [18M] lately", "post": "Hey Reddit! Over the past week or so my SO of 6 months has been acting pretty out of the norm with me... We normally always say goodnight before bed and say we love each other but this past week it just hasn't really happened, I've said it but it's not been reciprocated at all. On top of this there's been this guy she's been talking to [26M] who she says used to be nice but then got weird and sends her nudes all the time but she has never told him to leave her alone. As well as that, she doesn't like being known as my girlfriend or that I'm her boyfriend even though we do all the stuff, spend time together, go on dates etc. But she changes so much around our friends, and this has not just been recently this has been since we started speaking to each other. This comes then today, she was at my house and she tried to initiate sex, after messaging the guy, I said no because I thought something had happened in the messages but she insists all the time that he's the only one being weird. Shortly after I apologised because I didn't want it to seem like I didn't want her and then she broke down crying saying that it was because she was gonna miss me a lot when she went to uni, but the thing is that she's never done anything like it before, whenever I've been upset she's always been comforting and said that we'd still see each other, so that prompted me to think further that something had been said in the messages and she'd acknowledged that I realised. She's now at home and flaming me for apologising and wanting a reason to initiate it, when before she did, nothing was going on, I'd went to get us a drink and we'd actually had sex about 2 hours before and both gotten off. I'm really confused about what's going on, please help.", "summary": "My SO has been messaging a guy and telling me not to worry, tried to initiate sex after talking to him and then got really upset when I said no and is now ignoring me"}
{"id": "t3_4d76c8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [36F] with my \"bff\" [37F] She moved away and she always flakes on me when she's in town visiting other people.", "post": "She and I have been friends since we were 8 or 9 years old. We went through a lot together and were even roommates for a few years and then she moved away.\n\nSince she moved away, she has been consistently flaking out on me after saying she wants to see me, with all sorts of random reasons for doing so. When I had addressed this in the past, I was accused of being selfish and living in a bubble, whatever that's supposed to mean.\n\nWe reconciled a few months ago after she had taken my abusive mom's side during an argument we had, and she later apologized after someone else did the same to her. I really thought that things would get better, but in the past few months, she's been in town twice, left me for last in her planning and then - you guessed it - flaked on me. AGAIN.\n\nMy question is: should I just give up on this friendship? I'm so tired and hurt by this behaviour, and don't even know if she actually gives a shit about me, or what? Tired of getting my hopes up just to have them dashed an umpteenth time.", "summary": "Longtime friend moved away and can NEVER seem to keep any plans with me when in my town. Should I just give up?"}
{"id": "t3_36k2aj", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "He says he's happy, but he knows I'm not what he wants", "post": "Hey guys, \n\nI'm in a tricky situation.\n\nI'm with a guy right now and we have a lot of fun together and we never fight and we have a great time together usually. \n\nHe told me that he's happy with me right now and he's not sure how long it will last but he knows I'm not the kind of person he wants to marry one day... it really hurts. I feel like I'm not good enough. \n\nOne day he asked me if I loved him, and I told him I do and when I asked if he loved me he said No. \n\nIt was devastating. Am I self inflicting myself with this relationship? I love spending time with him. We laugh a lot... I'm hoping that if I can just show him the person I am that his feelings will change maybe and one day he'll realize I'm the one? \n\nI'm not saying I want to marry him, either. We havn't been together for very long but I do enjoy the time I have with him right now a lot. Am I just overthinking about the future? I go into relationships not wanting to waste my time - I'm looking for someone to love for the rest of my life... I hate jumping around. Soooo... am I just overreacting the future or should I step back from this thinking of \"am I/will I ever be good enough?\".. We're both very honest with eachother a lot and he shows symptoms of aspergers syndrome (I think he has it?) so I'm usually very blunt/honest with him as well as he is to me.", "summary": "In a relationship with a guy who doesn't love me, thinks he doesn't want to marry me and says one day we'll eventually \"separate\" because he knows he's not the one he wants to marry."}
{"id": "t3_197znl", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "You shall not pass!", "post": "I was driving home from work in San Antonio when I noticed this jerk in a sports car tailgating, honking, flashing lights, and in general being a major pest. We pulled up to a red light and he gunned it right through the intersection, somehow managing to not cause a major accident. I fumed for a bit but figured that was the end of it.\n\nTen minutes later I pulled into my apartment complex gate (it had one of those bars that raises and lowers after you put in a code) and there he was, idling next to it. I don't know if he was just visiting so didn't have the right entry numbers or what, but he was just waiting for someone to come in so he could slip by on their pass.\n\nI pulled up to the gate, put my code in, and saw him inches from my bumper waiting to race in behind me. The gate raised up, I went forward, he followed intently, and I stopped with my rear bumper just barely in front of where the gate would fall.\n\nHe fumed in his front seat while I waved, the gate lowered blocking him out, and I pulled away happy.", "summary": "Ass-hole drove like an ass-hole, got stopped at my apartment gate, tried to slip through just after me, but I blocked him."}
{"id": "t3_10e5ri", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Hey, r/loseit, what are our thoughts on supplementary pills like Slimquick or other \"diet enhancers\"?", "post": "I know, I know. Eat healthy, exercise, and you'll be fine. Your weight will plateau sometimes but you'll just have to get over it (literally). Do your best, cut carbs, make life changes.\n\nI've done those. I'm still working on them. But I was wondering if any of you have tried any supplementary diet pills (like Slimquick) and what you guys think of them. Do you think they would help? I'm particularly interested in them giving me some extra motivation - a reason to look back on the day and be like, \"Well, you don't need to eat any more today - and that pill will help you even more!\" sort of motivation.\n\nWhat do you think? Any of you have experience with Slimquick or others? Please let me know, I've been debating this for a few weeks and I think I could use the pills as motivators. Or I'll just be out 20 - 30 bucks.", "summary": "considering using SlimQuick on top of my diet and exercise - any experience on your guys' front? Stories? Words of caution? Let me know what you think, thanks!"}
{"id": "t3_3gvbc1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22M] girlfriend [18F] recently found out her last boyfriend was cheating on her the entire time. I feel like a consolation suddenly.", "post": "So my better half recently found her last boyfriend was cheating on her. This guy broke up with her by text and flaked on her constantly for 75% of the relationship (from what she told me) and she was suspicious of cheating the whole time. \n\nSince they broke up (January or so) he completely ignores her unless he asks for nudes/tries to hook up. \n\nBut even so while they were dating she was desperate for his attention and validation. She recognized what she was doing sticking around was not healthy but she did it anyway. Really liked the guy. That's important information.\n\nAnyway, so when she found out the other day that for the entire time he was seeing other people she got really down. Think it's entirely her fault. I'm trying to be supportive; being cheated on sucks. I've been telling her she's not to blame at all, etc etc. \n\nI've wondered why she picks up his calls when he tries to \"apologize\" (from what she told me he says it wasn't that big of a deal and she should give him a second chance) and I've asked her why she doesn't just delete him. She says she does but hours later she unblocks him or whatever. \n\nBut what really *really* gets me is that he said he wants to redo last year and treat her right. She allegedly shoots him down and says she moved on to better things but it is driving me up the got-damn wall knowing he's trying to get her back under his thumb again.\n\nAm I going bananas or is this something I should genuinely be concerned about?", "summary": "my girl's less than stellar ex is trying to halfheartedly apologize for not being an ideal partner and am irrationally worried about it"}
{"id": "t3_3cgij4", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Should I cut deeply into my savings and pay off my student loan or keep paying in increments?", "post": "I have ~11K in savings and a remaining balance of ~3K in student loans with a seemingly steep interest rate.  Even though I am 'paid ahead' until July of 2016, I am still incurring interest hits with each payment (generally pay $100/month towards the loan and about 87 goes towards principal and the remaining is interest).  Should I go ahead and pay off my remaining balance of 3K now, leaving me with 8K in savings?\n\nThings to consider: I just moved across the country for grad school.  I am currently unemployed and seeking work.  I can (and probably will have to) take another loan out for grad school in the next two months.  So I wouldn't be flat broke if any major expenses came up.   The only main concerns I have to worry about (aside from standard bills and insurance) are rent of ~625/mo, a dog who is now 7, and a 1999 car which seems to be surviving ok right now, but who knows.", "summary": "would it be better for me to completely pay off this one loan before taking out another, even though paying off this one will cut into my savings a good bit?"}
{"id": "t3_3bwd28", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My brother (M30) wants me (F25) to write a check from my recently deceased Grandmother", "post": "update from this:\n\nMy grandma passed away today.   My brother says he needs about $15,000 to finish paying for this semester (? how that works I have no idea since it is July) and is really laying the guilt on thick -- he can't come to the funeral because he needs to stay and look for a job, he is so worried he won't be able to get a loan by the time this payment is due, etc.\n\nThis is much larger than any previous check I'd made at my grandmother's request.  I'm feeling very uncomfortable but don't know how or what to say to tell him no, I'm not going to to write a check she never told me to write.   Or how to deal with the fall out from my mom and dad, because I feel like they will be upset and not understand why I'm not OK with this.", "summary": "My brother was going to school on my grandmother's dime; now that she has passed away, he wants me to continue to pay out of her account."}
{"id": "t3_3vjiaz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23f] need to have a serious conversation with my bf [23m] of two years about marriage and our future. What topics/comments/things to avoid at all costs?", "post": "Hello, I do know I am on the young side of the spectrum to be considering marriage, but my boyfriend and I have been in an LDR (different countries, four hour flight away) for the past half year, and will continue to be for at least two more years, minimum. I feel that a serious conversation about marriage and our future is necessary soon. \n\nNow, for context, we started this relationship knowing that we would be an eventual LDR and with the assumption that we would probably get married in our mid-late twenties. However, we're about to hit a point in our lives where there might be a big change, depending on whether I get the job I applied for or not. i want to talk to him and figure out our options together. \n\nSo this was how I thought I'd proceed. \n\n1. Tell him that I want to have a serious conversation about our future in general, and marriage (children, our own families), our values (religion, abortion, homosexuality), our finances (current and potential future), and our future(what happens if only one of us gets the job, what happens if neither of us get the job, can we survive the two year separation that's left, etc). \n\n2. Give him a few days warning so he has time to think about it. \n\n3. Sit down and have the conversation at home, cuddled on the couch, and with a beer each (only one each so we don't get drunk) and quiet music. \n\nHowever, are there any topics, questions, comments, or attitude to avoid (that is not blatantly obvious)? Or, are there any additional topics,questions we must go over?", "summary": "LDR boyfriend and I need to have a serious conversation about marriage. What are the things I must avoid/ask?"}
{"id": "t3_rbg5s", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "ex took me for granted, is now 'changing', and wants me back. Help?!", "post": "My boyfriend (22) and I (22) had been dating for almost 4 years. There was a short breakup in there about 11 months ago in the Spring because I was unhappy/didn't feel appreciated/could no longer put up with his lengthy list of bad habits and his attitude. After that breakup he 'changed'. He did everything the way I pictured a relationship should be. So we got back together a few weeks later.\n\nFast forward to the Fall: He is back to his old habits but worse. But there are still good times so I ignore them. And our relationship continues. But come Winter, we just are not happy. So we break up about a week ago.\n\nAnd then it all happens again. He 'changes'. He say's most of the change is because his doctor told him he needs to shape up, and he blamed most of our problem on the fact that he'd gotten fat and self conscious about that. Now he's running, and working out, and eating well, and stopping smoking, and is being more exciting and seems happier, and listening to me, and we have actual communication, and he shows affection, and sex (yes, we're broken up, I know it's bad and confusing), and he deleted his video games, and stopped sitting on reddit for endless hours(no offense, reddit). All the things that weren't there before.\n\nHe's doing what he did last time that worked to get me back last time again, but with much greater effort and what I think is more sincerity. \n\nI don't want to be a fool. It is nice spending time with him, now that everything is what I wanted in a relationship. But with us, it seems like we're better a bf/gf when we are broken up. I am really at a loss as to what to do. I don't want to not spend time with him. But I don't want to jump right back into it and repeat the cycle. Did he change, and is that change enough to make us work, or is this a failing relationship which is bound to be prolonged? Please, may I have some advice? I don't know what I want.", "summary": "Boy was a bad boyfriend, we broke up, Boy is now a good boyfriend, this happened once before, I don't know what to do!!eeek."}
{"id": "t3_1u8fie", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(21f)Accidentally spilled out a drunken 'I think I love you' to my new boyfriend (21m). He handled it better than I did.", "post": "My boyfriend and I just started dating a few days ago. He asked me out nye (super romantically, it was pretty adorable tbh)\nWe only recently met (2 months ago) but have ended up very close. I'm a very emotional person and he's very reserved and I'm cool with that. While super drunk last night in a total lapse of judgement I blurted out 'I think I love you' in kind of a half joking way (because obviously we still aren't THAT close being we've really just met) but it definitely caught him off guard and made him feel super uncomfortable. Being drunk I immediately went into 'holy shit I'm sorry wow that was stupid I'm an idiot' mode and got pretty upset, it's the first time I've gotten that way around him and It kind of spiraled into me feeling even more shitty about making him uncomfortable which in turn made him feel worse. He's an absolute sweetheart and was very honest with me, telling me he was uncomfortable with it but he's not thoroughly turned off from the fact I said it, just that he can't say it back. He hasn't had much relationship experience and I do know he does like me, but I also know that now I've compromised my calm and collected attitude and made myself look vulnerable, which leaves me with a lingering anxiety about how he's feeling and what he may not be saying. \n\nEverything is fine this morning, he kissed me goodbye and I went off to work and I'm going back to see him tonight, but I feel that I've thoroughly fucked everything up and can't really go back from this. Is this feeling in the pit of my stomach valid or am I just overreacting?", "summary": "blurt out the L word drunk to brand new boyfriend who obviously doesn't reciprocate. I freak out for making him feel bad, everything seems fine, but I feel like I dun goofed.  "}
{"id": "t3_1n5jds", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] with my dating person [24 M] of ~5 months, wondering how to / if I can even ask him to delete nude vid I sent him", "post": "Started dating one of my closest guy friends (known him since I was 5 years old) on in May this year. We hit it off great and generally we are happy together. He asked me for exclusivity, and I gave it. He hasn't directly asked me to be his girlfriend though, so I assume that we're just dating, exclusively.\n\nI'm not the type to post a lot of pics of myself anywhere. It's a personal thing that I dislike doing. But he often asks for them. I usually just decline and tell him that if he wants to see me, I'll hang out with him in person/online (Skype and stuff). \n\nThen one day I got curious and made a < 30 second vid of me naked (just me showing off my body and playing with my tits/ass). I sent it to him and he really liked it. Mind you, I hesitated for several hours before sending that video. After a few days though, I began to realize why I never did those things in the past. I regret sending him it and ***I just want to have him delete the video for good, right away!***\n\nI don't know how to do this. I don't even know if it's fair for me to. I just regret it so much (and needless to say, I will never do anything like this ever again).", "summary": "I want him to erase all existence of a nude vid I sent him. How can I do this without causing any friction between us? CAN I even do this?"}
{"id": "t3_1yysqt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [34M] am going to visit my friend [32F] in another state in a few weeks. There could be relationship potential, but when should I say something?", "post": "So I'm going to visit a friend of mine in another state in a little over a month. We've been friends for over ten years and we've always gotten along really well. She's smart and she's attractive, we know how to make each other laugh and we have a lot in common. I think that there could be more than just a friendship here, there could be relationship potential.\n\nA little background: This girl and I have known each other since college. She used to date one of my best friends, but we've known each other since before that relationship and have kept in touch since then. We drifted apart for a couple of years after they broke up but have gotten back in touch and have grown closer as friends over the last couple of years. I would have said something to her sooner, but I was in another relationship anyway until about two years ago and until know I've been reluctant to pursue someone my friend had dated.\n\nThe question is, when is the best time to bring this up? The tickets are purchased and I'll make the trip regardless. I have no doubt that it will be a fun visit either way. Should I say something before I get on the plane to go visit? Should I wait until I get there and can ask her in person? (Should I make a drunken pass and see how she reacts? :-P ) Help me figure out what to do!", "summary": "Going to visit a long time friend out of state. How and when do I tell her I'm interested in a relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_3us5mf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21m] recently found out my semi-LDR girlfriend [19F] of a year has depression. She has started acting cold and uncaring when we are apart.", "post": "Not really sure what advice im looking for.... am I overreacting? should i be worried she is fed up?  \n\nGirlfriend is in college during the week and we only see each other on weekends when she is back home. About 3/4 weeks ago she was not answering my texts or just being very aloof with me. When we met up at the weekend she eventually admitted that she has had depression before and is going through it again so she wanted to break up because in the past she has treated her boyfriends like shit during these periods and didn't want to do that to me. I said no, thanked her for telling me what was happening and then said we would get through this rough patch.  \n\nSo since then she has gone from texting me and talking throughout the day to maybe getting a text or two in reply to something I sent during the day. I know this sounds stupid but we have ended almost all of our texts for the past year with an \"x\" but she is even rarely doing that now. She is even purposefully ignoring texts as I get the read notification and if i get a reply it can be hours later.  \n\nOne part I can't understand is, when we are together at weekends things seem almost normal as she seems happy to see me, we hang out, sleep together etc.  \nWe even talk about possibly moving out together in the summer.  \n\nI know she told me she would be rough to deal with during this time but whenever I have asked whats up she says everything is fine. But I know during the times she is ignoring me she is actively talking to people on facebook/text etc.  \n\nApologies about the wall of text but this whole new behavior is driving me insane! And I don't know if Im worrying over nothing", "summary": "Girfriend seems to care about me less (even seems annoyed by me) when we are apart since depression diagnoses but acts almost her usual self when we are together. How do I deal with this?"}
{"id": "t3_gjasu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, Forrest needs your help identifying a genetic disease.  Calling those with superb internet skills and a passion for cute things. Pics inside.", "post": "Four weeks ago, a mouse I adopted had six babies.  All the babies looked like [wrinkly pink jelly beans]  Nothing was amiss.  \n\nDay 6 or so, we thought it was safe to [begin handling the babies]  All babies looked fit and healthy and [were all the same size]  It appeared as though they were having trouble moving their hind legs, but I chocked that up to them just learning to walk.  I noticed it especially in the dark grey-brown ones, but in hindsight, maybe I had been handling the same mouse every time thinking that they were different.  The only female was the white one, the rest were males, which made it even harder to differentiate between the three ones of the same color.\n\nOnce they really started growing hair and we handled them for hours at a time, we noticed [this guy]  Do you see anything odd about him?  How about if we [compare him to his brother]  At first we thought he was paralyzed, but it soon became clear that was not the case.  He could move his tail and his hind legs freely, but he didn't do it often.  When he did decide to move his legs, the movements were stiff.  He could curl his toes.  He used his whole leg like a flipper to push himself along the table.  We named him Forrest, after Forrest Gump, because he is a determined bugger who can't walk or do any mouse things as well as his brothers.  \n\nNow, he is one third the size of his family.  He developed slower than the others after day 12; his eyes opened about 4 days later, he took the longest to wean, and he is the least adventurous (understandably). \n\nAs with most random mouse pregnancies, there is a chance of the litter being a result of inbreeding.  His body size makes me think it's not an environmental or physical cause, which leads me to genetic disease.  Do his symptoms sound like anything you know about?  My google-fu has failed me, but I am only a trainee.  Thus, Forrest and I turn to you for help.", "summary": "Baby mouse is crippled with an atrophied hind end, is 1/3rd the size of his brothers, developed slowly.  What disease could this be?"}
{"id": "t3_4e471z", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "I feel like I'm going to be trapped in retail. Am I a failure?", "post": "I graduated in 2013 with a BA in Political Science. When I started college I thought I wanted to go to law school, but I realized that I only wanted to attend law school for my parents. Then I thought I'd want to pursue a career in international relations or something like that, but I just didn't want to go into more debt with more school. About a year after I graduated, I started to work as a substitute teacher, so I figured I'd pursue teaching. While getting into an alt cert program, I started working at Ross (the store) in October of 2014. While at Ross, I had so much pressure on me to find a teaching job with health insurance. Fast-forward to August 2015, I finally got a teaching job! But that job was hell on earth. I suffered from anxiety and panic attacks, so after two months, I had to quit. I went to a therapist (which I'm still seeing) and I'm doing much better, so now I have a job at Sears.\n\nI'm thankful for my job, but I'm 25 going to be 26 in May and I'm still living with my parents. I've been trying to save money, but I have a $450 monthly bill that I have to pay for that alt cert program. Luckily, May will be the last month I have to pay on that. I've been trying to apply to teach English abroad, but I just got rejected by EPIK, so I don't think that's going to work out.\n\nI just don't want to work in retail anymore. I'm not saying that retail is all bad, but I just want something a little more. But now I feel like this is all I can do right now. I'm starting to feel like I'm only qualified for retail. No other area will hire me. I've been looking for jobs out of state (I live in Louisiana), but I can't afford to move out yet (despite me desperately wanting to). I just feel like a failure who doesn't know what to do.", "summary": "25 year old woman still living with parents with a BA in Poly Sci. I work at Sears and I have no direction in life (and I desperately need direction)."}
{"id": "t3_2w1bt6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19M] am having trouble dealing with my girlfriends [19F] helicopter parents and could really use some advice.", "post": "So we are both college freshman and have a fantastic relationship (almost half a year in). But the only problem I have found in our relationship is her parents. College to me seems like when we become more independent and on our own. For me that is for sure the case and I love it. But **her parents are literally in everything she does**. She calls them and tells them about every class and assignment and then they usually and way to mean and tell her to study harder and do better. She sends them assignments to look over before submission. They shove religion down her throat when she doesn't want to be part of it. For Valentines day they send a few candies and the job listings section from a paper...\n\n**They treat her like a child and make me feel like I am dating a child.**\n\n^ That is pretty much the main problem. I feel like I am becoming an adult and moving to the next stage and then there is her parents pretty much babying her through everything. **I know for a fact if we want to move into together in a couple years it will be a matter of asking for their permission rather than \"We decided to move in\" which is insane to me.** An important factor I think is that they are rather well off and pay for all her things, including all college expenses. She has never had a job. I am from a poor family and worked my way here which makes me feel like we are different somehow. Any advice could help me so much, thank you.", "summary": "Her rich parents baby her; me coming from poor background feel like she is being treated like a child and am finding it difficult to handle. We have to ask permission to do things together which drives me crazy."}
{"id": "t3_1yqzk6", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (23/F) have been dating an inexperienced dater (23/M) and I have no idea what's going on.", "post": "So, we met on the ever popular OKCupid about a month ago, and have been on around 8 dates since. On our second date we ended up going home together, and having sex, but there was no awkwardness afterwards and arranged another date over coffee in the morning. \n\nOn Thursday last week, we had a bit of a \"where is this going?\" conversation, in which he confessed he's never really had a relationship or dated extensively. I have dated and had relationships in the past, so understand that it's a bit of an awkward new world for some people. I'm really into him, but he doesn't seem available outside of face to face dating. When we're together we have a great time, lots of fun and good conversations, but when we're apart he ignores my texts, doesn't speak to me often and seems bored when I attempt to strike up a conversation. It's leaving me a little confused and frustrated.", "summary": "I really like this guy, but I don't know if he's not interested or if he's just socially inept when it comes to dating."}
{"id": "t3_2uyk9a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27 F] can't get over the fact that my SO [28 M] of three years had a pet name for his ex but not for me", "post": "I know this is probably an irrational worry/concern because aside from this \"little\" thing, we have a great relationship. \n\nSomewhat early on in the relationship I found out from old facebook posts/albums that my SO had a pet name for his ex with whom he had an LDR for about half of the time they spent as a couple (about two years). He used to call her his \"kitty\". I love nicknames and terms of endearment like this. It makes me feel special and close to another person when they call me something other than my given name. My SO and I have been together for three years but he's never even tried calling me anything other than my name. I've already told him how I feel about pet names but still, nothing. I've even tried calling him silly or cute names but nothing has ever really stuck. I'm at the point where I don't really want to force it because I feel like stuff like that should come naturally. Which makes the whole ex-pet-name thing something that's bothered me for the longest time. He doesn't know that I know (because at this point I feel like it would be creepy to bring it up). Also, the name \"kitty\" really gets me because he loves cats. (not surprising, I know) So much so that every time that he sees one he'll say \"kitty\" in almost a baby-talk cutesy voice. \n\nSo I guess I'm feeling like I'm not as special/close/precious to him as his ex was just because he doesn't have a pet name for me. I don't know if it's even worth talking about with him because as I said, everything else is great and it's not that I don't feel loved... my scumbag brain just won't leave me alone about it :(", "summary": "my SO's pet name for his ex is the cutest thing ever and I'm jealous because he doesn't have one for me"}
{"id": "t3_mu1sj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Question about work. I may be in trouble.", "post": "Here is what happened . . . \n\nI have been working at a company for 3 weeks. I was assigned a project by my boss's boss's boss who never gave me a due date. While I was working on the project, my boss's boss told me that I should have someone look it over before turning it in.\n\nThe next week I sent an email to my boss's boss's boss (the big man) giving him a short answer in case he needed it right away. Later that day I had finished editing my project. At the end of the day, the big man told me \"I look forward to reading your project,\" while he was walking out the door. I panicked and sent him my project. \n\nThe next day my boss asked me if I had sent the big man my project and I said yes. She told me that her boss (my boss's boss) told her that all my work had to go through her. \n\nI want to ask reddit\n\nA. Does anyone think I will get fired for this?\nB. What would you have done differently to avoid this situation?", "summary": "Big boss asked for my project. I gave it to him before I had my boss read it like I was supposed to. Am I in trouble?"}
{"id": "t3_1x8pg8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I keep my parents' cigarette smoke off of me on my way to a college scholarship day, where I will be interviewed?", "post": "This Saturday (Feb. 8) my parents and I will be driving to the college that I will be attending this fall, which is about an hour and a half drive from home, give or take. My parents have been smokers for my whole life, so I am pretty desensitized to the smell, but many instructors and just random bystanders have commented about the scent on my person. This will not make a good impression on the committee (at least I think it is a committee. either way, it will be noticeable). I tried to ask very nicely if at least my mom would consider not smoking, but she kind of laughed at me and made a bunch of rude, sarcastic comments about how it's not really that noticeable, and my character should be enough to win over the interviewers. 1. My personality is not the best, and I'm not too great at interviews and 2. If the competition is tough, I am pretty sure that it WILL go down to the first impression that is given, and the smell of cigarettes is NOT going to give a good impression, even if I apologized and that my parents were smokers.\n\nSome suggestions that I have been given by instructors/counselors include: chewing cinnamon gum, packing my clothes and covering my hair until I get there (which I'm not too keen on, because I don't know where I would really change or anything like that), and putting cooking vanilla in the car? I'm not too sure about that one. Will any of these work? Other suggestions are very welcome.", "summary": "My parents won't NOT smoke in the car on the way there, how can I keep the smell off of me so that I won't make a bad impression in my interviews?"}
{"id": "t3_4kszrg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I tell if She [22/F] is uninterested or just shy after first date with Me [22/M].", "post": "I've just come out of a 4 year relationships a month later set up a date with a girl I've had previous dates with. Our previous dates were always a bit awkward because we were both nervous and I've always found it hard to talk to the opposite sex (so lots of silence).\n\nSo I began talking to her again last week and I decided not to beat around the bush and asked if she wanted to catch up for coffee to which she agreed. So the beginning of the date kind of started awkward i found her eyes kept moving around the room and wouldn't keep eye contact for long, there were moments of short awkward pauses like before, she asked me questions about my family and about other things but I felt I was asking her more questions. The second half i felt we became more comfortable she kept moving her hair behind her ear, would smile more and kept eye contact more and we ended up talking straight for just over an hour. But after the date was over I feel disconnected or not reaching the level of intimacy that I feel i should've.\n\nI'm not sure if because of my low self esteem/ confidence of a bad breakup I'm overthinking or over expecting things or seeing shyness as being bored or uninterested, Or if shes sending me hints she wants to just be friends.\n\nAlso is it appropriate to send the night of the date a \"I had a great time, we should catch up again soon\" message?", "summary": "Went on date. How do i tell if She is interested but shy or uninterested? Also appropriate time to send a \"i had a great time should catch up again\" message?"}
{"id": "t3_2f871v", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Misuse of plates/unregistered vehicle in Massachusetts.", "post": "Recently I was pulled over while driving an unregistered vehicle with another vehicle's plates on it in MA while driving from NY to CT.  \n\nMy mom had bought the car a couple days prior and was having issues getting temporary registration so the plates from another one of our cars was put on it temporarily so it could be driven to CT and gotten registered.  I went so that both the car driven up there and the \"new\" (used) car could be driven back.\n\nWhen I was pulled over I was issued a written warning for passing at an unsafe speed (definitely my fault as I made the large mistake of slowing down while passing another car because I saw a police officer) and for \"unregistered MV\".  The officer took the plates and the car had to get towed.\n\nI have the number of the tow company so I/my mom can return and get the car after paying for the tow (I don't believe the car was impounded but if it was then I suppose we have to take care of that too) and getting temporary plates in CT.\n\nWhat I haven't been able to figure out by asking Google is how to get our old plates back and what repercussions we'll be facing.  We've been trying to get through via phone to the police station in the town I was pulled over in but we've had no luck so far.  If anyone has any suggestions/answers on how to get the old plates back/get us able to drive our old car again and what we'll have to do (what fees or other legal problems can we expect) I'd be way appreciative.", "summary": "Got pulled over with another car's plates.  What do I do to get the plates back?  What other issues do I face now?"}
{"id": "t3_3arm1k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with the girl I've been dating[20 F] for 5 months... Just realized she looks alot like my mom", "post": "Title pretty much explains it, I've been dating a girl for the last four months and have really enjoyed spending time with her.  We have alot of common interests, the sex is great and I'm happy around her.\n\nBut the other day I came to the realization that she looks ALOT like my mom.  They both have short curly hair and similar figures.  My moms skin is alot lighter, and she is a bit shorter...  Buuuut, I can't get it out of my head now.\n\nMy family wants to meet her and I'm afraid to introduce her to them...  Could really use some insight or advice.", "summary": "Girl that I really like looks like my mom.  Now my family wants to meet her and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_16lx83", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[23M] I fucked up hard", "post": "Met up with 22F I've known for 8 years and liked for most of that duration (feeling has been mutual in the past, not sure about now). Noticed a bodily feature that is not normal (I brought it up because I thought it was fucking cool, I think she is the most beautiful girl in the world FFS) and mentioned it. She is super shy and stuff but even then she reacted really coldly to my remark, but I changed the subject. That was on Friday, and now I get up at 3AM to find a facebook msg from her older sister (like 26 or 27) where she is literally fucking yelling at me for hurting her lil sister by pointing that out and how she deserves better than this. I know for a fact that if this is what is coming from her older sister (who doesn't show much emotion either), the girl I like is REALLY upset.\n\nThis is coming to me after I've spent last few days thinking about this girl and being lovesick to the point where I couldn't properly do anything besides lie in my bed punching pillows and reading love novels and shit. I don't know what to do at this point. I know I should apologize but, how far should I take this? Do I just apologize? Do I tell her she is pretty? Do I tell her how much my heart hurts every night thinking about her? Do I tell her she does deserve better than me? I'm clueless. Help me out.", "summary": "Like a shy girl, pointed out there is something weird with how she looks, I'm the biggest asshole ever. How do I properly apologize to her?"}
{"id": "t3_3syi5q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19m] moved to London back in May, and facing a terrible situation", "post": "I moved over here for work, into a house with 4 people already living there - The ad for the room said: Professionals only.\n\nAnother guy [36m] from Romania lives in the house, and wanted his wife and 3 kids to get into the house.\n\nOur landlord [50m] Egyptian, accepted it as a way of 'helping his family over here', which we all said was OK.\n\nNow it turns out, they plan on staying in the house until ATLEAST next summer - and we all pay the same rent and share bills (approx 1300$ a month)\n\nTo make it even worse, his 3 kids [1/3/4] are ALWAYS awake until midnight, sometimes later, and they are so noisy it wakes me up all the time throughout my sleep, and causes too big of an exhaustion to go to work.\n\nOur landlord put the father on the council papers and contract, and since we're too many living in the house, I'm not able to get on the contract.\n\nWhat would the best solution be to actually get his kids to shut it this late?\n\nSo far I've recorded the last 3 nights - 10 minutes in the hallway, 15 minutes in my room, with constant noise from the kid - Is there anything else I can do to make our Landlord realise that it's just not okay.\n\nI don't have the money for the deposit to get another room somewhere elsez", "summary": "I got a house full of kids, noisy until midnight and past, got recordings, I'm not on the Council papers, room was advertised 'Professionals only' the rent is high, what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2qsr28", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Im a [21 F] at my wit's end and in desperate need of advice for my relationship with [21 M] boyfriend of almost 4 years; is it time to move on and how the ef do I even begin to do so?", "post": "How do you break up with someone if they are the only person you've been close to in the past 4 years, if they have a shit family or no place to really call home? I am afraid I will ruin him. I can't think of life without him yet I feel we are toxic to each other.\n\nMy parents do not approve of him, say he brings nothing to the table for me and that I am not responsible for his life. It has put so much strain on our relationship throughout the years and I have found myself exhausted. Their strict rules have also been extremely troublesome/stressful for us and I am often pushed to my limits in order to maintain a balanced relationship between family and bf but more often than not one of them suffers.\n\nI do not know if I'm trying to make things work between us because I feel guilty and responsible for him, or if I'm just afraid of what will happen if I let him go, or if we are actually meant to stay together and work through these hard times. Things have escalated in the past few weeks and this fate has become more imminent than ever. His unstable living situation is putting so much stress on the both of us. We have dealt with distance for the past 3 years horribly. I play a division 1 sport in college and have a ridiculous schedule while he has not been able to hold down a job for more than two months because of unfortunate variables relating to his shitty living situation. It will be a huge pivoting point in both of our lives if things end but I feel as if we are stuck in some awful loop of shitty circumstance and I do not know how to get out of it.\n\nI'm sorry if this sounds pathetic this is the first time I've tried writing this. I really have no one to talk to and am in desperate need of advice. \n\nI am at my wits end. He is so important to me and I just want to do what will be best for both of us in the end.", "summary": "Am I staying with him because I love him or because I am guilty and scared/I don't know what to do"}
{"id": "t3_hdmo8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I hope this is appropriate for AskReddit, but I'm looking for last-minute summer research/work. Anyone have any ideas on what I could do?", "post": "I'm living at home with my parents in Houston, Texas. I'm a post-bacc student at UH, taking classes to get into a CS master's program, and I've already graduated from a top school with a BS in geophysics. I've also worked for years doing web dev and have a broad range of experience, and I can program decently well also have extensive web development experience.\n\nThere's lots of internships I probably *could* have gotten if I hadn't waited so long, but since this is the last minute I don't know what to do. I can't work from home, really. Any ideas? Pay isn't important, if I can get good working/research experience. Although pay would be nice. :)", "summary": "sorry if this is a lame question for AskReddit, but I need something to work on this summer, pay or no pay. Hopefully something CS-y. Any ideas?"}
{"id": "t3_50xc7z", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "[22] and pregnant, what would you do?", "post": "I'm a moderately high achieving community college student and president of a club.\n\nI'm currently eligible for three AA degrees, my plan is to get my Bachelor's in zoology, then go to vet school.\n\n/endbrag\n\nAll signs point to not having this baby right?\n\nMy boyfriend of four years is super supportive and really wants to have this baby. He said he would do everything he can so I don't have to stop going to school. However he said he would support me with whatever decision I make.\n\nCurrently I live with my parents, I expect to get kicked out which wouldn't be terrible I guess because my boyfriend and his family are moving up north closer to the school I want to transfer to.", "summary": "I'm doing really good in school and I have a bright future, I don't want to give up on my lifelong dreams but I would also feel selfish having an abortion."}
{"id": "t3_2fyinf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I could be the other guy [26M]. She [25 F] wants me, but has a boyfriend (now long distance) of almost 3 years. I need opinions on what I should do", "post": "I will try to be brief.\nWe met, we went out 2-3 times, great chemistry but at time I could feel she would give me mixed signals. I held back, eventually (after 4 dates) asked her to dinner to my place while I made it obvious what my intentions were... she told me about BF... I could see it coming but didnt blame her for it, since our first few dates could have been interpreted as friendly ones (.. as if she didnt know what was going on)... I told her I respect that and backed off. She said shes struggling with it so naturally I have kept myself around, but have not been looking for her, yet we text a couple times a week, and have hung out a few times after that...\n\nCurrent situation is\n\n- she knows i like her\n- I know she likes me\n- last time we hung out and i dropped her off she sent a message asking if shes a bad person for wanting to kiss me (i just avoided answering that and said something else related to the night, even though i wanted to say more)\n- I am still assuming shes still with the guy. Havent texted or seen her since...\n\nat what point would it be reasonable for me to put pressure on her again? do I just let it run its course and fucking suck it up as long as I can, do I wait for another situation where she clearly wants to be with me, and act on it?\n\nI like this chick, and I feel that if she cheats on her bf with me, I will always have that in the back of my mind if I got in a relationship with her.... but at the same time, I dont wanna wait around indefinitely", "summary": "Im being respectful, and letting her figure it out on her own, but shes starting to put me in a situation where I dont know how long I can hold back. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_xfiay", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "22(F) and 29(M) Casually seeing each other, but he keeps asking me to go on romantic dates?", "post": "Hi Reddit, long time lurker, first time poster. Throwaway account. I am a 22 year-old female and he is a 29 year-old male. We have been casually seeing each other for about six weeks now.\n\nWe initially met through a friend at a bar, and things were awkward at first, but we ended up going for a late meal and hitting it off. After we met we began texting quite frequently (maybe once a day) and went on a few dates. We first slept with each other on the third date and it was great. Since then, we have gone on a few dates, that almost always end with us sleeping together. I consider all of this to be casual and we have never discussed a relationship or anything more. \nBut here is my issue: he keeps asking me to go on all of these really nice, fancy dinner dates. I do enjoy his company but I do not want to pursue anything more than what we currently have going. He is attractive, generous, and sweet; but we do not seem to have an engaging connection and I got out of a very long and intense relationship at the beginning of the year (so I want some time to be single), among other reasons.\nMy question is: when would it be an appropriate time for me to bring up my concerns? He invited me to go on a date this week. Should I go and tell him there? Or should I decline and tell him right away that I think these dates are a bit much for our given situation? My personal philosophy has always been don't discuss being serious unless the other person brings it up. He has not brought it up. I guess my biggest concern is that he pays for our dates (I try to pay for my half or my drinks and he never lets me) and it seems unfair if I don't want to be official in the end. He is a great guy and I would like to continue seeing him without any strings attached.", "summary": "Casually seeing someone, we have never discussed a relationship, I don't want one. He keeps inviting me out on fancy dates. Should I tell him that I am not interested in a relationship and want to keep things unofficial?"}
{"id": "t3_13hkiz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "For any Girls out there... Will you help me in my quest for knowledge?", "post": "I'm a Soon To Be 18 Year Old male and I have always have had a urge to know \"everything\"... well, recently I've been wondering what it'd be like to live as a/be a girl. Now, I'm not homosexual in anyway, but my brain just hasn't let up on this simple fact of my urge to learn the \"mysteries\" of a man. Now, onto my question, Do any one of yall reading know if/how a man can grow breasts (I'm not looking for anything too big, just something to give me an idea). I don't want to do anything costly, I.E Implants, and I don't want to do anything to noticeable/permanent.", "summary": "I'm a guy, and I want to know how to grow breasts to know what it's like to have them."}
{"id": "t3_wsjwz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Trying to keep my brother out of jail", "post": "His ex-probation officer called him today to tell him he failed an etg (tests for alcohol consumed in past 72  hours) in April. It is now two months after he was supposed to have been off probation and he now finds out he has a warrant and is looking at a maximum of thirty days. \n\nSo long story short I am trying to raise money for him so that maybe, with a slight bit of luck, I can cut down how many days he has to spend in jail after he is sentenced. Maybe pull the cool scene like in the movies where someone posts bond but he doesn't know who.\n\nMy goal is to buy wristbands and sell them for donations. We have A LOT of hoodlum friends in our city and I know I could at least make a couple hundred.\n\nI guy what I am asking of you guys is what should I write? First instinct for me was \"fuck cops-free (my bro)\". But do you think people will hesitate to buy something like that or jump on it?\n\nAlso, any recommendations for who to go through or what type of wristband? I'm thinking the engraved ones like the livestrong ones so they last but they get pricey fast. I looked on Google but I kept feeling the first couple sites were trying real\n hard to fuck me", "summary": "court system is dicking my bro around and want to sell wristbands to get him out of jail sooner. Looking for advice"}
{"id": "t3_3mwnhs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [32 M] with a great [30 F] girl and I want to settle down but never stay satisfied with relationships more than a year or two", "post": "My past three relationships have all been about 2 years, and I've ended all of them because of a combination of problems and me losing interest. \n\nThe current girl I'm with has mostly everything I would want in a relationship - but I'm feeling myself starting to lose interest anyway. She does have a fairly bad jealousy problem, but some of it is warranted and I feel that everyone has to have some personal defects which should be forgiven.\n\nOne factor which I think contributes to feeling unsatisfied is that I tend to get what my friend calls a \"wandering eye.\" Even though I'm happy with my gf I can't help noticing other girls around and being drawn to them, even catching myself flirting at times. A lot of it is sexual attraction and desire - it seems horrible but after being with my gf almost a year I'm less interested in sex and occasionally get a rush of excitement when I notice another girl showing interest in me. \n\nI could just date indefinitely but I do want to settle down and have kids. I just always get the feeling that I can't stay satisfied with my relationships, and if I'm getting this restlessness after only a year or two I can't imagine how it would be over the rest of my lifetime. \n\nAn obvious answer would be to decide which is more important, dating different people or settling down, and then have the self control to stick to the decision. It's just that long term I *want* to settle down, but I can never escape the feeling of wanting to pursue other girls. A few years back I told someone older this and they said \"you must not be ready,\" but I can't help feeling like this isn't going away, and I really would like to start a family.", "summary": "Want to settle and start a family but start losing interest in relationships after a year - any advice or experience with this would be appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_y8el7", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Thought I had an offer: Did my other recruiter screw me over?", "post": "I've been working with a recruiter. I lost contact with him 1 month ago.\nI applied to another job through recruiter #2. Had an interview last week, went very well. Expected an offer on Friday (that's when they said they would contact me)\n\nToday I get a call from recruiter #1, asking me my situation. I tell him I might have an offer and may not need his services. He asks \"mind if i ask which position and company?\" I tell him (I don't know why I did).\n\nA couple hours later, I get a call from recruiter #2 saying I didn't get the job. WTF. He says he has no idea why, since I had such a great interview.", "summary": "GREAT INTERVIEW,  99% sure I would get offer FRIDAY -> old recruiter finds information about this, I suddenly get a rejection call today out of the blue."}
{"id": "t3_2n93j2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] see/ remember only the good parts of our 3 year relationship while she [18F] sees and remembers only the bad parts", "post": "My gf and I dated happily throughout high school and we're now doing long distance in college. We've been having some issues because she feels like I haven't done her much good.\n\nWhile I look back on our years together and see love, happiness, hand holding, kissing, and everything nice she sees lies, fights, separation, and everything bad.\n\nHow can I help her see my point of view? Bringing up good memories and feelings can only make her happy for a night. Most of the bad things about our relationship is stemmed from her not being able to let anything bad that's ever happened with us go. She just feels sad with me.", "summary": "My girlfriend remembers old bad memories (fights etc) which makes her sad about us and I don't know how to help her see the good like I do (nostalgia doesn't help)"}
{"id": "t3_48h6vz", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Oklahoma] Contract Dispute", "post": "I'll try to keep it short for you all. This is in Oklahoma.\n\nBefore we started building we agreed upon the terms and signed two contracts. We signed a Construction Agreement and Specification Agreement. The first one lines out the overall terms of the contract, the second one lines out the specifications that the home is to be built to (construction materials, quality, etc). Both of these documents have a total sales price listed on them, however the price is different on each one. The Construction Agreement has the price listed at $200K, which is $6K higher than the price that is listed on the Spec Agreement.\n\nThe main dispute we are having is over a septic system. When we entered into the agreement we agreed that I was going to install the septic myself and save us $6K. However after construction started we had a hiccup with our guy and we ended up letting the builder install it for us.\n\nOn the Spec Agreement (the one with the lower price) he actually has in there that one of the things he agrees to is to install a septic tank, even though when the contract was signed he wasn't going to do that. This Spec Agreement says the sales price of the home with him installing septic is $194K.\n\nWhen I saw the discrepancy in prices I thought he'd just forgotten to take the $6K off of one contract, but not the other. When I talked to him about it he said it was a typo and the price on the Master Agreement (the higher price) is the correct price and the price on the Spec Agreement is a typo, plain and simple.\nWhat he is trying to do now is to charge us the higher price ($200K) plus an extra $6K for installing the septic. I'm not trying to get anything for free here, I'm just wanting to be fair.", "summary": "The Master Agreement has the price as $200K without a septic tank. The Spec Agreement has the price at $194K and says he is to install a septic tank included in that price."}
{"id": "t3_2h4wkk", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Need help to get away from bully bosses", "post": "Im in my early 20s and I make loudspeakers and amplifiers for a living. I have worked here for around a year, learning how to do the job from scratch with no experience. My two bosses are awful people who shout, swear and pretty much make my life hell. It is a very skilled job but I am paid minimum wage, less than people who work in supermarkets etc! I was told after 6 months I would be given a pay rise but this did not happen. I decided not to bring it up and just try and get a new job. I have been trying for months now but to no avail.\n\nOn the 4th of august I broke my ankle, meaning i literally cannot work as I am required to stand for 9 hours a day. My boss has rang me numerous times basically bribing me into coming into work, telling me how I am not playing ball and basically not committed to the company. This spurred me on to apply for jobs, and I have an interview for an admin job tomorrow. Can anyone give me some advice? \n\nSorry about the wall of text....", "summary": "Bosses are abusive liars. I break ankle and all of a sudden I am bad guy as I cannot work and now I have an interview for an admin/office job."}
{"id": "t3_1i7agg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (19F) hung up on (20M)...still", "post": "I'll try to keep this short and sweet. In the last few weeks of term at college I met this guy. We were basically unstoppable together. Spent every waking hour together, went on adventures, were a big bundle of energy, so alike in every way, amazing amazing sex. \n\nProblem was, he's a pro skier and is gone for 3/4s of the year training nonstop. We didn't talk about things before we left, but kept talking on the phone, texting for a while. \n\nThen we decided that we had to break things off. It would be almost a year before we would be in the same place again. Skiing is incredibly emotionally consuming. It was fine. I understood, it was for the best.\n\nBut it has been a month since we decided to break it off. It doesn't feel like I'm getting over him. Sure, I have a few moments here or there that are temporarily alright, but they are just tiny distractions from the fact that I miss him. We've barely talked in the past weeks. I'm so afraid that I will never find anyone that gives me such energy, that fits with me so wonderfully. I don't even know if I want to get over him. I don't know if he wants to get over me.", "summary": "Standard whirlwind romance cut off prematurely, is ending up to be more than a brief infatuation and I have no idea what to do with myself. "}
{"id": "t3_fxqgp", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Moving From One Coast To Another - fml :(", "post": "Wasn't really sure where to ask, but r/travel made the most sense from what I could find.. anyways..\n\nI'm moving from NYC to either Seattle or San Francisco in June, and am scratching my head as how the hell to actually do it. Right now I'm planning on road-tripping it with a couple friends (one who's flying over for the trip, another moving from ATL who may be using a U-Haul). I don't have a lot of things to move- mostly boxes of things I plan on shipping, and then a bit more (valuables, etc.) that I'd just take along for the ride. Basically, I want to travel light, but will take the things more fragile and whatnot.\n\nI guess I'm looking for insight on the following:\n\n-Rental companies (for cars)\n\n-Does it make sense to even rent a car for that distance (buy used??)\n\n-Ways to save a buck in lodging (I love camping!)\n\n-Shipping companies; items (clothes- ship most of them, or take?)\n\nI don't know. This is such a new thing for me. I guess if any one has attempted and completed this crazy thing that is moving across the country, any insight would be of help.", "summary": "Moving from NYC->SEA/SFO/FML need info on things a newb wouldn't think of first time around.*"}
{"id": "t3_1fv9qi", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Accidental non-petty revenge.", "post": "This is the story of how my plan for a petty revenge accidentally got my victim arrested.\n\nSo I met an old bully at a night club a year or two ago, and he came up to me and tried to be all pally, despite the fact that he made a few years of my life hell. I told him to fuck off, and went on with my partying, but his mere presence ruined my night, so I planned some petty revenge.\n\nI knew the owner of the club, and some of the guards, so I told a guard that I thought he might be dealing drugs in the bathrooms to get him thrown out. Little did I know that he was selling drugs in the bathrooms, and things get a bit out of hand.\n\nThe guards check it out, and realize that he is selling drugs, so they try to stop him. He punches one guard and locks himself in one of the stalls (and even though he is in the bathroom he does not think of flushing the drugs).\n\nThe police comes and while arresting him, he breaks one of their noses. He was charged and convicted of aggravated assault, assaulting a public official, resisting arrest, selling cocaine, ecstasy, amphetamines and weed.", "summary": "I try to get a guy thrown out of a club by saying he is selling drugs. Turns out he is selling drugs, he assaults a guard and a police officer and gets arrested."}
{"id": "t3_4lq1s6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] been on a path of self-improvement but struggling with the opposite sex", "post": "I've never been a big time ladies man or anything but I've generally had a decent love life, my fair share of relationships, girls having crushes on me, etc. A year and a half ago I had a bad breakup and realized I didn't like who I had become. I was out of shape, emotionally unstable and generally unhappy.\n\nSo with this introspection I set on a path of self improvement. I work out daily now, did some therapy, graduated uni and got a great new job and even improved my wardrobe. I've made new friends and reconnected with old ones (male and female), and I've been on more fun adventures in the past year than I probably had been my whole life.\n\nYet somehow with all that, I feel like I'm become less attractive to women. I haven't done anything sexual with a woman since my breakup a year and half ago (hooked up with my ex a couple times post breakup but that's it). For a long time I didn't let it bother me as I was focusing on myself and making myself a whole happy person, but now that I'm finally 100% where I want to be, it's starting to erode my confidence and almost hurt my progress. I'm the type of guy who's been to bothered by my lack of height (5'7) but now I'm suddenly really self conscious about it since it's the only thing I CANT change about myself. Is it just that in this tinder-age sex revolution some of us are just bound to left behind? Am I self-sabotaging myself somehow? Is there some part of my self-improvement that I'm missing?", "summary": "Been trying to improve myself since my breakup but while my personal lifestyle has improved my love life has taken a nosedive. What am I missing?"}
{"id": "t3_jpbqa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Work advice", "post": "Me 26 F, My 2 co-workers 45 F.  I've been at my job for 3 months and management is very impressed with my work.  So impressed, that they've put me in charge of one woman and they want me to learn another woman's job.  These two women have been at the company for 3 years and it's quite obvious that they hate me.  They've yelled at me, told co-workers that I don't know what I'm doing and are insulting me in Armenian.  I'm trying to be as nice as possible about the whole situation.  It's understandable why they are upset, but I'm having a hard time not taking it personally.  Advice, please?", "summary": "New girl at work is put in charge of 2 veteran employees.  They are upset and taking their frustration out on me.  How do I not take it personally?"}
{"id": "t3_2xcfj9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] kissed my girlfriend's [17F] close friend while we were on a break. I confessed this to her and she doesn't trust me anymore.", "post": "I was on a break with my girlfriend after some difficulties and I kissed one of her close friends. Although I thought I would not be getting back with my girlfriend, I regretted it immediately. Sometime afterwards I got back together with my girlfriend and I told her last night what had happened as I couldn't deal with the guilt. She started crying and said she has lost all trust in me. I feel sick. Just to be clear, she was seeing other people on the break too. I guess since it's one of her close friends I crossed a boundary. What is my next move? I hope you can help!", "summary": "I [18M] kissed my girlfriend's [17F] close friend while we were on a break. I confessed this to her and she doesn't trust me anymore."}
{"id": "t3_kihvu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "The worst person is in my math class. What do I do?!", "post": "This semester, I'm in a higher level math class, which is a pretty OK course. It's a class of maybe 30 students. I (and quite a few of the other folks in my class) have found it increasingly difficult to concentrate, however, due to one individual. This guy is a non-traditional student. He sits in the front of the room every day, but there's always a small ring of empty seats around him because he has serious personal hygiene issues. B.O. combined with the smell of a pack's worth of cigarette smoke emanates from his body.\n\nTo make matters worse, it seems that he has some sort of autism. He'll rock back and forth in his seat during class which is both visually (he sits in the front) and audibly distracting (the seats creak).\n\nThe cherry on the cake, however, is that for long stretches of class he will breathe exclusively through his mouth. I have no idea whether this is a health-related issue or a psychological thing, but his breathing is loud enough to make it hard to hear the (albeit soft-spoken) professor.\n\nWhat do I do, Reddit? These seem like issues that shouldn't really exist, but can anything be done?", "summary": "Loud-breathing, chair squeaking, smelly man in my math class is going to make us all fail with his shenanigans. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_429l9k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it insensitive for me (17f) to break up with my boyfriend (20m) because he's moving away to help his mother?", "post": "I'm copying this from /r/relationship_advice\n\nMy boyfriends home state is Michigan and he recently (in October) moved here, to NC. We met soon after he moved and we started dating on Thanksgiving night. Last week his mom got into a car accident (minor injuries to her) and is getting sick (I don't know what with). She has to either fix her car or buy a new one, and she's already late on rent. So my bf is moving back home to help her out.\n\nHe told me he wants to get her in a better financial situation, and get himself into a better one too. I understand it fully, and I don't blame him one bit. I just don't want to be in another (I've been in two!) long distance relationship. I can't handle them well. And I know we won't be able to see each other much, and I just feel like its a bad idea. But at the same time I feel a bit selfish and insensitive. Am i?", "summary": "bfs mom is broke so he's moving back home (another state) to help, I don't want a ldr so I'm breaking up with him but feel insensitive"}
{"id": "t3_xloav", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Today, I realized why I am so calm and collected during times of chaos and disagreement. My body turns anger into sadness, reducing me into a sobing mess every time I get angry. What horrible decisions does your mind make for you that you can't control?", "post": "From what I can remember, my childhood environment was filled with distrust, yelling, judging, anger, confrontation and control, \n\nany attempt at voicing my opinions or becoming angry was useless and ended up worse then it needed to.\n\nSince then any sign of anger was channeled away and eventually filled with sadness and severe depression. I'm not an angry person, nor do i concern myself with things that stress me out, my life is vary vary stress free.\n\nRecently after I looked back on what brought me here and why my body reacts the way I do its pretty clear. Any immediate bout of anger instantly turns to sadness and tears involuntarily.", "summary": "I can be as serious as I want and tears will start flowing and my chest will start convulsing from sniffing while I'm talking because my anger involuntarily turns to sadness."}
{"id": "t3_2aj9mc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "23M- girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me. Thinking of getting an escort- good/bad idea?", "post": "For the first couple weeks I was so depressed I could only sleep 1-4 hrs a day and couldn't stop overthinking things. Now for the past couple days I've been sleeping okay and have started thinking forwards. I still miss her, am a bit sad, and have dreams of her almost every day. Though the majority of the day now I'm fine.\n\nI've also been really horny lately as I haven't done it for a month now. Am thinking of getting an escort. I was looking to get into a one nighter or hookup for the past week but have had no luck. No matches on Tinder really brought down my self-esteem too though I think I'm above average looking. Feeling stressed out, should I get an escort for a night or will it be a huge mistake?", "summary": "Broken up, miss girlfriend and sex, really horny, no luck with a hookup, am lonely, should I get an escort?"}
{"id": "t3_45imu0", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "11 years since my heart transplant, and i'm tired of medication's side effects", "post": "When I had my heart transplant i was 12. I remember I was always tired and i can't breath properly so my mother took me to the ospital. We found out that my heart was larger than normal, they put me on transplant list and 3 weeks later there was an heart available for me.\nNow I'm 23 and I almost spent the majority of my life with a new heart. I'm grateful for that, but sometimes i feel like it's an heavy bag on my shoulders. Sometimes I feel guilty, because when i was sick i prayed for a new heart (and it means that i prayed that a child would die to take me alive).\nSometimes I just feel \"normal\" and then reality comes back and hit me in my face with a new complication (my medication take me alive but they have a lot of side effects)\nI don't plan my life, I just live it day by day, knowing that one of this days my doctors can tell me some bad news.\nIf i must describe what i feel, it will be a mix of angriness, resignation and a little bit of fear, knowing that life took my innocence away when i was a kid.\nSorry for my bad english but I'm italian", "summary": "Since my heart transplant i feel angry and depressed at the same time, knowing that medications save me and kill me at the same moment"}
{"id": "t3_273kpy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[28/f] How do I become relationship-type and more feminine?", "post": "I don't think I'm relationship-type.  I'm also insecure about my level of femininity.  \nMen that I meet (work/socially) are hardly ever single.  The ones who are and that I get to know, I almost always develop a crush, but try so hard to hide it that they just end up becoming a good friend of mine.  They usually make it clear that they are attracted to me, but I disregard it.  I make it so easy to be comfortable with, the start sharing secrets and life stories and I do the same.  And that's where I know I screw up.  I also think I am headstrong, brazen and outspoken.  I'm very opinionated.  Also, I'm not as feminine (clothing) as other women.  I wear makeup, do cute hairstyles, wear lipstick, do my nails, wear jewelry, I have a perfume collection, etc.  But I do not wear skirts, dresses, or heels and open-toed shoes.  I think it is all beautiful, but I feel so alien like with it on.   I'm not a tomboy, I just don't like super girly attire.  I've had a male friend tell me that he and a lot of other men would date me if I was more feminine and submissive.  \nAlso, I've dated a couple of guys in the past who refuse to get serious with me.  They don't take me seriously romantically.  It seems like they'll try to hook up (9/10 times I'm not putting out) but not make anything exclusive.  I'm starting to feel real insecure.  Am I crazy and just don't know it?  Do men really only date super feminine women?  Am I too friendly?  How can I become more comfortable?  What do men like?  I'm at a age where I want to be in a relationship and fall in love, but I'm not sure if someone will ever accept me for me.  Sorry for the pity party.  I've been single for so long, I have to accept it is my fault.", "summary": "I can't get a date, not feminine enough, too outspoken, will someone ever like me for me or should I change?"}
{"id": "t3_2cne01", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by visiting an ex", "post": "This is a throwaway.\n\nI dated a girl from January to August of last year.  We were pretty intimate, and had sex regularly that often ended with me finishing inside her. (It was mutually enjoyed, as she was on contraceptives.)  We had a pretty nasty breakup, and we didn't talk for awhile. \n\nIn May of this year, she sent me a random text apologizing for things she said.  Feeling pretty frisky (and I suppose somewhat lonely), I offered to meet up and catch up with her.  I had no intention of rekindling our relationship, but hey, possible sex.  So we met at a bar, and I ended up going to her house.  We had sex in our normal fashion and proceeded to stay over for the night.  The next morning, we discussed our situation, and I confessed I didn't want to advance our relationship.  She somewhat reluctantly agreed.\n\nI've been seeing a new girl for about a month now, and things are amazing!  We click on every level, she's gorgeous, and I find myself thinking about her constantly.  I don't think I've ever been so intrigued by somebody after such a short amount of time. I think I've found the perfect girl.  Except...\n\nToday my ex called me.  She's pregnant.  She had secretly been off birth control for awhile, and she admitted that she thought a kid would be a way to \"keep us from fighting\" and to \"make us close again.\"\n\nYep.  I think I fucked up.  I don't know what to do, or how this girl I'm seeing will take it.", "summary": "Had a one night stand with exgirlfriend. She was crazy enough to stop taking contraceptives to purposefully have a kid with me without telling me."}
{"id": "t3_1z815m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] with my GF [25 F] She broke up with me, I found out she was cheating. Should I confront her?", "post": "OK so first the background details. We've been together 4 years and live together. I truly love her and had planned on proposing to her later this year. 2 weeks ago she broke up with me over a silly fight. Said she need time to herself blah blah blah. I was devastated as I didn't see it coming. The weird part is she currently has been living with me after the breakup and will be here until next week which is when she will move out.\n\nNow for the juicy part. Today i opened her laptop and she was signed into her email. I found numerous chat logs of her and a male co worker talking sexually and she even had sent him a nude photo. These texts go back to November. Normally i don't like to snoop around so I feel super guilty, but I had been having suspicions all along. I remember about 3 months back her entire attitude had changed and she became more distant which is around the time she had also mentioned that there was a guy in her office who liked her. This is the guys shes been chatting with.\n\nNow, even though we are broken up I don't know what to do. Should I tell her I know? Even though it means exposing myself as having gone through her email? Should I just let it go? I feel like shit because this coworker of hers is married and basically I think instigated this whole ordeal for her to break up with me? Either way I'm at a loss.", "summary": "GF broke up with me 2 weeks ago. Still living together and now found out she had been cheating. Should I confront her or let it go?"}
{"id": "t3_4fqaqs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [21/F] is having a mental breakdown, how can I [21/M] help her?", "post": "My girlfriend is going through a rough patch in her life right now. She is a university student doing an extremely hard subject. She has a lot of pressure on herself right now due to fear of letting her parents down.\n\nTwo weeks ago she started having obsessional thoughts about death and not existing. This prospect scared her to the point of having several panic attacks every day. She isn't religious and does not believe in an afterlife. Going to church seemed to help at first, but she is simply too inquisitive and scientific-minded to genuinely believe in an afterlife.\n\nNow the panic attacks seem to have subsided but she is still having these thoughts. It usually manifests itself as an hour long period of not being able to function and then suddenly gathering up the energy to study for hours. She doesn't feel comfortable talking to her parents about this anymore because they tell her she is crazy. She has told me herself that the feeling is so unbearable she wishes that she just didn't exist sometimes.\n\nI am encouraging her to get as much physical activity as possible and showing my support, but I feel clueless what else I can do to make her feel better? I try to avoid the subject of death now because nothing I say makes her feel any better; she counters anything I say with \"so what's the point, we are all going to disappear in the end.\" When she isn't having these thoughts, she is fairly normal, but they happen often enough to affect her day-to-day functioning.\n\nGoing to the doctor isn't a realistic option right now for various reasons.", "summary": "Girlfriend recently developed a fear of not existing after death, this is on top of exam stress and some other problems, how can I be a supportive boyfriend for her?"}
{"id": "t3_17loda", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17m] feel like I lose connection with my girlfriend [17f] during the week, but it flares up on the weekends. Lack of PDA problem?", "post": "My girlfriend and I were friends for a very long time and in the last two months have become a thing. I really really like her and as far as I can tell, she is really into me, but we have a problem. \n\nShe haaaaates PDA which is kind of a problem because we spend a lot of time together during the week in classes and other activities. To be fair, I don't really like PDA either but she hates it with a passion and refuses to let it happen. Consequently, I feel like we drift apart during the week. But wait there's more! On the weekends we will get together 2 or 3 times at either her place or mine and good god do we get together. There's so much passion when we're together on the weekends (alone) but then come Monday morning (in public), everything shuts down. Do you have any advice on what I can do to remain intimate during the week without PDA?", "summary": "A lack of PDA during the week and totally insane weekends have me feeling all over the place about this relationship. How can I keep things interesting during the week?"}
{"id": "t3_35j19m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34 M] with my coworker [29 F] working together for 3 years, How do I get back to being just friendly coworkers?", "post": "edit typo: Me [24 M]\n\nWe've been working together for about 3 years and I just started to feel really attached to her in the last 4 months. I never told her and I did the best I could not to hint at anything because she is already in a relationship. I accepted that we will never be together and I'm starting to feel less shitty when I'm not around her. \n\nThe problem is. We still go to lunch together and see each other about once or twice a week. \n\nAny tips on how to forget about romantic feelings for her?", "summary": "I [24M/single] need tips for burying my romantic feelings for female coworker [29F/in relationship]"}
{"id": "t3_4rcpyt", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Overly frustrated with soon to be in-laws, wedding planning in general", "post": "Hi everyone,\nI proposed to my girlfriend this past March and we have done zero planning for it so far. I always wanted a big wedding until I came out and then the reason people get married completely changed for me. Now I just see it as I want to spend the rest of my life with her, not go into a lot of debt (neither of our parents are helping pay for it) and be stressed out, just so we can wait for the day to be over to move on with our lives. We're also saving for a down payment for a house. We were thinking of going to the courthouse and then throwing a party for everyone but that's  not good enough for her parents. because then aunts and uncles may feel excluded because we can't bring a million people to the courthouse and she's the only daughter so her dad wants to walk her down the aisle. I have three sisters, so my dad has been there done that. We were then thinking of a destination wedding but it would be really expensive for her parents to pay for her brothers to come (three younger brothers, still in college/hs) and her parents tried guilting her about her brothers not being there. Really, if we could go and get married today and move on from it and do nothing for it we would. But it seems unless we do wedding/reception everyone's going to be mad. \n\nSorry for the long rant, but does anyone have advise on what to do? Has anyone done/seen the \"screw you we got married at the courthouse now moving on from this\" move? How has it worked out?", "summary": "we both just want to go to a courthouse, her family wants this to be a huge deal. How to compromise when it's you paying and planning for it."}
{"id": "t3_536y2y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Afraid of my (29f) husband (27m) leaving me at his cousins wedding.", "post": "Okay well, not *leaving* leaving. I'm not very good with crowds- they make me incredibly anxious to the point where I'll have a panic attack. Knowing my husband will, at least, be there with me usually helps me feel more comfortable around crowds. I'll know a fair bit of people there, so it's not like I won't have anyone to talk to. It's just the sheer amount of people that makes me freak out. \n\nMy husband, however, doesn't understand this. He enjoys going from one set of people he likes to another, and usually in ways that would a) be impossible for me to follow him or b) make it very creepy if I were to try. He always tells me I should just try opening up and talking to people without him, but with the amount (even over 20 people) will start to make me nervous. \n\nI don't want to hinder him in any way, and I don't want to be a \"ball and chain\" to him. But I also feel like he's a little bit obligated to me as his wife to reassure me if I'm scared or anxious. What should I do? Is there a way of explaining this rationally, or am I just being unreasonable.", "summary": "Husband and I are going to a wedding with lots of people. He likes moving around and talking to people, and I hate being in crowds. Is there a way we can reconcile these, or am I being unreasonable?"}
{"id": "t3_1cbuw2", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(21/f) Husband (23/m) is honest and attracted to a coworker", "post": "I have been in a relationship with my husband for 3 years now (married 1year) and we have a child. We fell in love in college but our relationship started with him choosing between me and another woman (we started as FWB) and after a bit of drama (nothing to dramatic really) he chose to be with me in a commited relationship. Fast foward to last year around october, we are enjoying sime alcoholic beverages and he lets it slip that in the very early days of our relationship he cheated on me...3 times. Of course I was shocked, hurt, angry, ect but we were married at this point and he was very ashamed so we talked about it and I decided to just try and handle it. I let him know that his trust card had been revoked and it would take a lot of work and time to get it back. well here we are now, he has been working at this place for 2 years and recently told me of a woman that works in the pffice upstairs for weeks her name kept coming up and I even gave him a book to give to her on a subject we are both interested in. Yesterday he confessed they were attracted to one another and that he felt bad because she flirted with him and he let her and he flirted back. He told he had been working up the courage to tell me for a couple weeks now and he tells me he will tell her today he can no longer be aroumd her or talk to her because of their attraction. Problem solved? \n\nI told him I was happy he told me and did not freak out on him because I want him to tell me these things in the future but my self esteem has always suffered and now it is even more crushed. I do not know what to think or feel or how to get over his past cheating and become a confident person. I feel lost.. Help?", "summary": "my husband with a history of cheating is attracted to another coworker and my self esteem is nonexisisent at this point"}
{"id": "t3_27lpd0", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Reddit, am I in trouble with the law?", "post": "Hi ! I was just DD'ing for my friends on a saturday night. I have expired plates as of may 30th and my insurance proof was at home.  A cop pulled me over to tell me that my plates were expired. I understand I should not have been driving but I have been late on getting them renewed (this is in canada by the way).\n\nThe officer took my license and asked me for my proof of insurance, I did not have it so I told him so. He gave me back my license and did not ticket me or anything, he merely told me to meet him at the station before his shift tomorrow and bring the insurance proof. Currently am I in trouble? \n\nThe problem is the station is way across the city and I don't want to drive without my plates renewed. If I did not make the trip to show him my insurance proof tomorrow as he requested will he be able to ticket me or arrest me, he does have my name and license number and all the information on the license but the address on my license is not mine.. what I really want to know is that as of right now if I do not drive my car until I have my tags and insurance up to date and do not provide the documents the police officer asked me to provide will I be in trouble", "summary": "Police pulled me over, technically I committed an offence, did not receive a ticket or a citation. Is there anyway I can be charged for the misdemeanor after the fact ?"}
{"id": "t3_39uvju", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me [22M] cut contact from a girl [23F], she ended up texting me today.. need advice", "post": "Cut contact with this girl because she still had a boyfriend.  I let her know that I saw us as more then friends and that when she becomes single for her to contact me and if not best of luck with everything.\n\nthree days later I get a text (legit 10 minutes ago).  \nShe said, \"Just so you know we broke up.\"  (meaning her and her boyfriend.)  Now, I do not know how to respond, do I ask why, ask her how come, ask her when... \n\nThing is we have been friends for a few months and I just could not do the friends thing anymore, so I decided cutting contact would be in MY best interests.  I can not ask her on any dates though because she is in Florida till october, and I just need advice on how to approach this situation.  Such as how to handle, stay in contact, be there for her, all the while keeping attraction up to what it was beforehand so that when she comes home our lives can intertwine again.\n\nThanks Reddit,", "summary": "cut contact with a girl because she had a bf, told her text me when single if she ever is going to be, texted me today, need advice"}
{"id": "t3_ddoay", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is there a name for this phenomenon?", "post": "I went to the bar last night for a friend's 21st. When I returned home, I went to sleep.\n\nDuring my sleep I had a very intense dream about myself and several friends being held hostage in my own house by 14 armed men (probably because my thoughts were still on the fact that my house was burglarized yesterday morning). In this dream, I kept trying to escape the hostage-takers, but consistently failed. Then, when the dream got to the part where I was supposed to be shot, I jolted awake and realized I hadn't set my alarm before going to sleep.\n\nThinking I was very late for work, I panicked, jumped out of bed, and looked over at my alarm clock to see the time was 8:25am - 5 minutes before the time my alarm clock would have gone off had I remembered to set it.", "summary": "Is there a name for the phenomenon where a person wakes up right when they were supposed to without using an alarm clock? Is it different if you fall asleep drunk? "}
{"id": "t3_113ik9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Second-guessing my AWESOME relationship and I need help reddit!", "post": "I'm a 24/m in a great relationship with a 19/f. We've been together for almost 10 months and things are good. She's WONDERFUL and I couldn't ask for anything more. She's cute, smart, funny, independent and so supportive it's almost scary. However, I find myself second-guessing our relationship. Thoughts almost constantly plague me about whether or not she's \"who I'm supposed to be with.\" To be honest redditors, I'm scared. To make things more complicated she just moved in(after having BIG problems with her previous roommate and not having anywhere else to really go). I want her around, I want her in my life but I just don't know what to do(or not do). I find myself with \"grass is greener\" syndrome and every other mildly cute girl I see I wonder if it'd be better with them. I have no idea what better would be though. I love her and my family loves her yet I find myself doubting this good thing we have. I want to get out of my own way and be happy. Any suggestions? I REALLY want this to work.. it's the best relationship I've ever had!\n\nThanks guys", "summary": "I'm in a great relationship but scared that it's not \"right.\" We just moved in together and I find myself full of doubt even though it's a good thing."}
{"id": "t3_s2bt1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "It's my Dad's Birthday, and I'm out of ideas!", "post": "So going through my head trying to think of the things I have already bought him and what he needs, but now I'm stumped! He's a guitar teacher, so obviously he's very musical, he likes old movies and red wine. I have managed to be super creative in these categories for the past 15 of his birthdays but seeing as he has seen nearly every good pre 70s movie under the sun and he's bound to get really nice wines as gifts from his students, I just wanted to be a bit more creative this year. So, any ideas? :S\n\nCheers! :)", "summary": "It's my Dad's birthday, he likes music, old movies and wine, I need creative suggestions for a present as I am out of them."}
{"id": "t3_ciqdi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I am a narcoleptic who has lost hope", "post": "So, I never thought it might come to this.\n\nI have narcolepsy. For the longest time, I felt that I had it under control. In school, my condition was misunderstood and I was ridiculed by my peers as well as my teachers. I overcame and found a nice job. I was laid off because of the recession and took up a job with a certain job with a certain game-related company. I tried my best to excel at my job, to the point where I became the Go-To-Guy for information on technical resolutions and policy matters. \n\nToday, I was demoted because my narcolepsy sometimes gets the better of me and I miss work. I cannot afford medical insurance nor the medicine to make it less of an issue ($500 for a month's supply). I was told that the ADA did not apply because attendance was a hard requirement for being a higher level agent. Our HR person told me that any job I get will have a requirement about attendance and that the ADA will never side with me. I am forced to assume an entry level position in a job I used to love. I feel as though my hard work will never pay off now, because my narcolepsy will also stop me from advancing and that ADA does not apply to me. \n\nI still feel like I'm being discriminated against but if what HR told me is true then I do believe that any career I take will be hampered by this condition, which cannot be cured. \n\nPlease, tell me there are options. I feel as though I'm about to slip into a state of depression that I had left behind me so long ago. I don't want to be there. Please, tell me that there is hope.\n\nThrowaway account for obvious reasons..", "summary": "Demoted to entry-level position at work because of narcolepsy. Losing hope in my ability to hold a career because my condition will hamper me eventually and I will become unreliable in the eyes of my employer."}
{"id": "t3_3x4uq0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] boyfriend [20M] is failing out of college and I'm not. I have absolutely no idea what to do.", "post": "Hi guys. I'm gonna keep this short for privacy reasons. Also throwaway. \n\nMy boyfriend is a wonderful, sweet, caring person, but no matter how hard he works, he is just not good at school. We go to a competitive college (his dream school) and he's currently stuggling. If he has one more bad semester, he'll have to transfer to a smaller school and live at home for financial reasons. \n\nOn the other hand, my grades are pretty good. I'm no scholar, but I do well. \n\nI have no idea how to be there for him through this without sounding like a jackass. I can't really empathize with him because I've never been through that. I can tell he's frustrated and disappointed, but he also doesn't want to talk about it. \n\nI love him so much and it kills me to see him like this. Anyone have any ideas about how to make him feel better? Should I let him work through it on his own? I'd really rather talk to him about it to show that I care about him and that I'll be there for him. \n\nHow do I bring it up? How can I help him to not feel so bad about this? How can I let him know that if he has to transfer it'll be okay? I don't know how to bring it up without sounding like I think he's definitely going to fail out?", "summary": "Boyfriend is failing out of the college we met at. It's his dream school. I'm doing fine. I have no idea how to be there for him."}
{"id": "t3_24p1uo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (21/f) broke up with my bf (23/m) a week ago. Was it the right thing to do?", "post": "note: throwaway because he's a reddit lurker.\n\nme and my boyfriend would have been together for a year at the end of the month. We broke up after a conversation a week ago about our happiness came up (I asked if he was happy and what was happening to us after a weird patch). We mutually decided to end it and stay friends but I'm starting to regret it.\n\nI'm worried that our unhappiness was merely due to my health problems and school stress getting me down and his sister is dying making him unhappy. I have felt worse than ever since and I just want to be with him. I told him I missed him last night and he told me he misses me too.\n\nAlso, a big part of me not thinking it was exactly the best idea to work it out was that next year i'm leaving for a month or two to travel then in 2.5 years when I finish studying I plan on leaving to find a new home somewhere in this big world. He says travelling doesn't interest him when it's my whole life plan to travel. Yet since meeting him my life plan wants to include him, what if he doesn't change his mind?\n\nDo you guys think it's a good idea to talk to him about this all? I'm worried that if I do and he doesn't want to work this out the friendship we have will go to shit and I will be left COMPLETELY alone - note: i have very little friends as it is, none of which I can talk to about my health problems, he's my guy. I don't want to lose my friend.", "summary": "broke up with my bf, want to tell him how i feel but don't want to lose my best friend."}
{"id": "t3_2kipo8", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [20f] think I might have fucked up a friendship and I don't know what to do.", "post": "So me and my best friend, \"Jane\" [21f] have been best friends for about a year, prior to us knowing each other she dated \"Paul\" [23m]. They broke up, but they're still friends. The three of us took a summer class together and we were pretty much inseparable. Get back to main campus and \"Paul\" dates this other girl and \"Jane\" is upset and doesn't talk to him for a month. Flash forward a year to present, the three of us are still very close, hangout most weekends. Now I kinda like Paul now, but I've been ignoring that because he dated Jane, so I know I shouldn't and I casually date a few other guys. Well this past weekend Jane goes home (we're college students). So friday night I'm texting Paul and we discover we're both about to watch the same movie. He asks if I wanna watch it with him, and I know I should have said no, but I didn't. So we watch the movie at his place and then go to a friend's and everythings fine. He drives me home and then tells me he's had a crush on me since my freshman year, when he was dating Jane. I told him I liked him too, but we couldn't do anything because of Jane and we had a good thing going and we should keep that way. He agrees and apologizes several times that night and even the next day.  What I'm wondering is do I tell Jane, I tell her everything, but I think telling her may hurt more than help, since I kind of suspect she has some residual feelings. Also I think I hurt him because I feel like hanging out with him on a Friday night lead him to do this. Right now we're still texting and I think we're just ignoring it, but he left early for his class today instead of hanging out with us. I feel so guilty and selfish and I dont know how to make this better.", "summary": "My friend and I recently discovered we have feelings for each other, but our mutual friend (my best friend) dated him and now it's awkward and Idk if I should tell my best friend or not. Any advice is appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_3jpfzn", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not wanting to be rude to a hairdresser", "post": "This happened about an hour ago. I went to get a haircut as my hair was getting too long, I usually have it cut by the same girl but today I got booked in last minute and had someone new. She sat me down and asked what I wanted and since I've only really had one hairdresser for the past two years I've gotten used to not saying what I want. So I say \"I don't know\", but she still fires questions at me and I reply as best I can saying \"Not to short\" and \"Yes she does use clippers\" (referring to the other hair dresser). Eventually she gets started, and this is where I fuck up. She takes number 4 clippers and takes a chunk of hair out of left side of my head, I only expected her to trim around the edges but she went all in, I should have stopped her but I just don't have it in me to be rude. So I try to stay calm and let her finnish, after all, she is a professional. She completes the final touches... And it looks terrible. I have a long face, if that makes sense, and the way she cut it makes it look even longer. Now I'm sitting inside not wanting to venture outside for at least 3 weeks, but I have school in 2 days. Do you think I'm overreaching a bit?", "summary": "I got a bad hair cut and I should have been a bit rude to the hairdresser to save it."}
{"id": "t3_3i75pt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] think I want to end my relationship with my Father [46 M]", "post": "So growing up I have always had a good relationship with both my parents. They were great parents and there's nothing I can honestly complain about with how they raised me. I was also really close to my Dad when growing up. Please believe me when I say he wasn't always a jerk. He was a good Dad and husband. He taught me a lot and helped me to become the independent person I am today. \n\nUnfortunately, he is not that person anymore. Over the last two years he has just kind of been gone. He would not come home. for days. If he did come home he was always really drunk. Later I found out he was also under the influence of some drugs. He also cheated on my mom with a girl around my age. \n\nSo I watched my Dad go from a happy-go-lucky guy to a sad, pathetic drunk. In May this all came to a head. It was a really tough time for my family. My Dad eventually told my Mom and I he was going to stop and he was going to get help. So, we tried to rebuild the family. \n\nI actually got to see my Dad happy again. He stopped drinking and doing drugs. He seemed to be making progress and I was getting ready to forgive him\n\nWell, long story short, he was caught cheating again and doing the previously mentioned things. I just can't handle it. Why did he not just leave back in May? It could of been done with months ago. I just feel even more hurt now. \n\nI know he does not want me to cut him out of my life, but I don't know what else to do. I guess I am just wondering if anyone else has been in a similar situation? Also, would it be better to just cut him out of my life completely? \n\nSorry for the rambling. This is all pretty fresh still.", "summary": "Over the last two years, my Dad has turned into different person and for the worst. He has been cheating, drinking and doing drugs. Is it time to just cut him out?"}
{"id": "t3_1xkxji", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend's [27M] girlfriend has a serious issue with me [27F] for no reason. He won't address it.", "post": "I've been very good friends with my friend, Chris, for 4 years. We met through my ex and we've always had a completely platonic friendship (I was also good friends with his ex-wife at the time). He's been in a relationship with his current girlfriend (Angela) for about a year and a half. For numerous reasons, I've only met her once about a year ago and she was very sweet and friendly. Since then we haven't seen each other because she travels for work and that's when Chris and I catch up; additionally, she has her own social life and on days when she wants to be alone with her friends, he and I will grab dinner. She never has a problem with that as far as I know.\n\nAnyway, I went out with Chris, Angela, and another couple on Saturday and when we were exchanging hello's she just glared at me. No response. I was shocked, but I thought she was in a bad mood and let it go. Throughout the night, however, she ignored me and didn't even look in my direction once. She was bubbly and friendly to the other couple but excluded me. When I did address her at one point (trying to be civil) she merely glared again and didn't respond. \n\nThe next day, I asked Chris what happened. He acknowledged that even the other couple noticed what was going on and texted him about it at the table. I assumed that he and Angela must have discussed it, but apparently he didn't raise the issue at all. I was shocked and hurt, and he defended his decision not to ask because he has bigger priorities now (they're having problems-- no wonder). This is out of character for him.\n\nI've never done anything to warrant this type of treatment and I'm concerned because we'll be at the same event in a couple of weeks hosted by his brother. I feel like I deserve an explanation, or at the very least, someone should raise the issue with her.\n\nHow do I discuss this again with Chris? :(", "summary": "My (f) friend's (m) girlfriend ignored me at dinner and I have no idea why-- he won't ask."}
{"id": "t3_4gn9vk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 F] started seeing someone [24 M] for the past couple months, should I be concerned by the age gap?", "post": "What do you make of this age difference?  In the beginning I wasn't bothered by it, but I'm starting to wonder if maybe there is something wrong with this relationship. \n\nWe get along great and share a lot of the same interests.  He has a full time job and I just started uni.  I'm conflicted because I like him and feel that we have great chemistry, but we are in two very different places in our lives and I don't want to be taken advantage of.  He's never made me feel like the lesser individual in the relationship but I'd appreciate any input on the situation so that I can proceed in a way that is healthy for us both.", "summary": "I am dating someone 6 years my senior, I am a freshman in college.  Do you think this is weird, or a cause for concern?"}
{"id": "t3_44blw7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[19M] There's this girl [19F] I like. Does she likes me back?", "post": "We go to german lessons together, I met her a week ago. Our 'german group' is really small (only 6 people) and we're actually the only people talking to each other. \n\nShe is very kind and friendly towards me and tries to initiate chat. She laughs hysterically(!) at some of my jokes (she doesn't laugh at ALL of them). She says \"hello\" in a very seductive way, yeah I know that's a stupid thing to say but I've never been greeted by a girl this way.\n\nNote that this girl is BEAUTIFUL. And I mean perfect 10/10 and probably gets any guy she wants. I gotta say I'm an average looking guy, slightly above average in best case. I'm really not that funny guy, I don't lack social skills but I'm a bit weird, in a positive way. \n\nIn normal circumstances, I'd say she's into me. But I really have nothing to show her what other guys don't already have! \n\nIs she maybe pranking me?\n\nOr does she genuinely likes me?", "summary": "I don't know if this girl likes me or not. She's very hot and I'm average by all means."}
{"id": "t3_v0yy8", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "I need a gift idea for my daughter's first day of kindergarten. Help me, Reddit.", "post": "My little girl was born 7 1/2 weeks early (which was also six weeks past the age cutoff for our school district).\n\nAfter two weeks in the nicu and a month on heart/lung monitors at home, she completely caught up and surpassed pretty much every growth metric for actual age (forget about adjusted!).\nNow, at 4 1/2 she's reading books designed for late first-grade and doing late-kindergarten math, mostly just on her own volition.\n\nWe've been terrified for a while of her having to wait an entire year for her to start kindergarten because she'd probably end up a huge discipline problem and start-off her entire school experience on a terrible foot.\n\nAfter months of looking, we finally found a private school willing to bend the rules for her and that we can afford.  Once she's through kindergarten, she'll be set for public school and we're off from there.\n\nSo, aside from my huge sigh of relief, I desperately want to give her something on her first day of kindergarten to show her how proud and hopelessly attached to her I am.\n\nBut, I'm drawing a blank.  I've thought about jewelry, but what can I find that would withstand a kid that young and be something she'd want to keep as she gets older?\n\nHelp me, reddit!  You're my only hope.", "summary": "Daughter was born pretty premature but has thrived. Now, despite being slightly too young, going to kindergarten in August.  I need a gift as special as she is."}
{"id": "t3_q41lk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, i need your help with a girl.... its complicated.", "post": "alright so some background info - im 19 and just finished school, i live in australia and am going to college in a couple months in Canberra (australias capital). About 4 weeks back i went to Europe with my family - we went all over Europe on holiday (zermatt, then chamonee, then paris then...\n\nthen we got to saint brieuc. My sister went on French exchange there and had a lovely family with three sisters, (one 19 one 21 and one 24) my sister is now 23. Our plan was to stay there for 1 week (in their house because they insisted) and then it happened.I met the 19 year old and... i fell for her. the second i saw her i knew... Reddit, ive had girlfriends before but ive never met a girl who made me stutter like this, or a girl who made me so happy like she does and did..\nThe cutest thing about it was that we both had done 3 yrs of french and 3 yrs of english each, so our talking was very funny ^.^ and there was often a dictionary close by... for the longer sentences we used translators on iphone.\n\nnow to the question : \ni have dreamt of her every day since i got back from france, and every time i do i find myself smiling.\n\nReddit... what do i do?\nim not happy here, i cant find purpose in my life without her and even if she doesnt feel the same way just to be near her would be enough for me.. just to be her friend and see her smile...\nbut i dont have the money and my parents refuse to send me on any elaborate holidays... i also wouldnt be able to get along in france without knowing the language..\n\nim lost reddit... and ive come to you.", "summary": "i fell in love with a french girl who lives thousands of kilometrees away from me and who doesnt speak my language."}
{"id": "t3_4c0a3k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Long distance girlfriend [24 F] of six months is moving again but not back where I [30 M] am.", "post": "I got into a long-distance relationship about six months ago, right before my girlfriend made a temporary move. We were just getting to know each other at first, but things kept snowballing as we got to know each other and we got more emotionally involved. She has been back once since then and things kept building to the point that we were talking about life plans when she returned.\n\nThe problem is that she's now not going to return for several years.\n\nThe plan was that she would be back here for graduate school, but it turns out that she got an offer she can't turn down somewhere else. It's going to be a multi-year commitment of lots of work, and there's no guarantee she will ever be back here, even though it's currently part of her long-term plan.\n\nSo the options now are to give up or go with her. Neither really feels like the right choice. I encouraged her to go to the school because the offer was too good to pass up, and I'm not about to ask her to take out substantially larger amounts of debt so we can be together. But with her going to school, she will be locked in for several years and maybe longer once she starts her career. I can travel to see her more often than we have so far, but ultimately, I would have to move at some point. \n\nAs for me, I'm further in my career, and it's unfortunately not one where good opportunities come up very often. I also have friends, connections and a current job where I am and wouldn't have chosen the city she's moving to for myself if I were to move. I worry that if I go, she will be all I have in this new place.\n\nWe both want to be with each other and have said that we thought this could be a lifelong relationship. We are both heartbroken at the thought of giving up, but staying together doesn't seem to be an option either.\n\nAny words of wisdom from someone who has made long-distance work? Or from someone who has moved solely for another person? I'm heartbroken and distraught all at the same time.", "summary": "Long-distance girlfriend is moving to a new city, and I'm not in a mobile situation to join her. It's either give up or go with."}
{"id": "t3_1sfkno", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (22/F) and my boyfriend (31/m) of 2 years. Feeling rejected.", "post": "Hey r/relationships, I need your advice. I'm posting this on mobile so I'm sorry in advance for any formatting errors! \n\nI met my boyfriend, L, 2 years ago. We hit it off instantly and the chemistry between us was insane. I know the age difference seems a little strange, but we've made it work with very little struggle until now.\n\nWe moved in together in August after dating for about 1.5 years. When we first started dating, we were having sex every time we saw each other. That was 5-7 times a week. Naturally as our relationship matured, the sex slowed down a little bit. For the past year and a half, we have sex maybe twice a month, and I have to initiate it every time. Since we've lived together (4 months) he has initiated once. Now I'm not naive, and I know he watches porn and masturbates daily. I've come across the porn on his phone. I've been trying to tell myself that I'm perfectly ok with this and that it doesn't hurt me at all. But I can't lie to myself anymore. I am hurt. He chooses porn over me daily. I've tried to talk to him before about how the fact that he never initiates sex with me hurts my feelings and makes me feel unwanted, and those conversations lead to him giving me a thousand excuses and initiating once the next day and everything goes back to the way it was for a few months. I've never brought up the porn because I'm really scared he will choose it over me... He really is the love of my life and other than this, our relationship is nearly perfect. He is a very caring man and I know he is who I want to spend the rest of my life with. R/relationships, how do I fix our sex life? I want to have sex more often, and I want him to initiate it more. I know I need to have a conversation with him, but I don't know where to begin.", "summary": "My boyfriend's porn habit is really hurting our relationship. How do I talk to him about it in a way that doesn't make me seem crazy?"}
{"id": "t3_47srf8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex [20 F] of 3 years, asks me [20 M] to drive 500kms and get them.", "post": "My ex and I have been ex's for about 5 months. She broke the relationship off, she said her feelings for me had faded. I was truly heartbroken and I am still progressing this, but feel less for her every day now days. Within this time we've talked a little, mostly basic questions like how eachother is doing.\n\nI figured out a couple of days ago that I still have a couple of things at her place, a grillpan, and a couple of other things. Now we live about 500 kms apart, so get it is really not that easy. So I messaged her about it. It goes a day or two, she messages back that she can't find a box that big for the pan to fit in. I replyed that she can buy a large box, she claims she does not know where to buy one big enough.\n\nIn the next message she askes \"Stupid question, but you wouldn't be able to come here and pick them up? :)\".\n\nAs much as I still have still feelings for her, but certainly not as much as before. I wonder what she really wants. I don't want to be rude either, we handled this breakup like two adults. I don't know if I want to see her, as she was my first love of course she will be special to me. What can I reply to this?\n\nIf a longer version is needed, I think I can provide one.", "summary": "I still have stuff at my ex's place since the breakup, she asks me to drive 500kms and get it."}
{"id": "t3_foasu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Teachers vs. Unions - What do you think?", "post": "Here are some thoughts, and feel free to chime in - this is a discussion not a debate.  I believe teachers should be well paid, based on merit.  They should have to take examinations and re-up their credentials on a regular basis.  They are, after all, the most important people in the world.\n\nHere's the dilemma.  Teacher Unions are the scummiest, worst organizations in the world.  Yes, they protect teachers (some of the time) but put most of their effort in making money from (underpaid) teachers in order to perpetuate the myth teachers will die without a union to back them.\n\nSadly, in the US, teachers would likely get ass-raped by the powers that be if they didn't have a union at all.  So it's kind of a catch-22.\n\nWhat do you folks think?", "summary": "Teachers should be paid well based on merit and examinations for re-certification : Unions should die in a fire."}
{"id": "t3_2uwnne", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my crush [23 F] 1 month, I like my big sister of the fraternity I'm in?", "post": "I am in a co-ed fraternity and I got paired up with this girl I didn't know was going to be so amazing. I could talk to her and carry a conversation without having any trouble at all. I feel like she is so easy to talk to about things that I have trouble telling my best girlfriend. She makes me smile, laugh, and just makes me happy when I'm around her. However, she's my fraternity big sister so that could potentially be weird. I know she doesn't like dating within the fraternity but will do it if the right guy comes along. Any advice would be helpful. How can I approach this situation?", "summary": "I like my big sister in fraternity. How do I tell her I like her without things being awkward because after all she is my big sister?"}
{"id": "t3_4qz4ea", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Donating land out of Revenge. How will this help my tax returns?", "post": "This is my first post ever on Reddit so please bear with me. \n\nA little backstory to begin, when I was a child my father bought 2.3 acres of property in a school district that he wanted us to attend in South Carolina. The hope was one day to build a house, however, as time passed that never materialized. We've owned the property for 20 years and over that time we've paid property taxes, sometimes late in the face of financial instability. Currently, we're doing better but still its an unnecessary financial burden and we'd like to capitalize on the property value having doubled since when we purchased, valued at $30,000 currently. We hired a realtor to sell the property a couple months ago but it has sat without much interest.  \n\nWe discovered our neighbors have been removing the for sale signs because they don't want someone to build on the wooded lot. We have left letters in the community's mailboxes detailing the problem. Without knowing which neighbor is doing it, we can't report them. Though the property is listed online, I'm pretty upset that there's not a on-site advertisement. In my frustration I was trying to think of alternatives while possibly irking the neighbors. I came up with an idea that actually was feasible and not too dramatic. We could either donate or sale the land for a reduced price and use it as a tax deduction; we considered Habitat for Humanity or Helping Hands. The problem, I know very little about about the tax deductions allowed/ how it would be applied. I read the full market value of the land is deductible but what does that mean in terms of tax refunds come next year? \n\nI want to do some good for the community; I have a BA in architecture and during college I was involved in community building and designed low income housing for those in need. My father has a similar sentiment but is business oriented and wants to reclaim his investment. I feel like this solution scratches both itches. Also, I would be lying if I didn't get some enjoyment at the prospect of inconveniencing the neighbors. Any ideas or information is welcome even if they aren't directly related to this idea. I just need advice on how to move the property with the maximum benefit for all (except those dick neighbors.)", "summary": "If I donate a piece of land to charity out of spite, can I deduct it from my taxes and if so, how much of the value would be retuned as a refund (all, none, some?)"}
{"id": "t3_3e7t2a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 F] chose to date my boyfriend [21 M] over dating my best friend [19 M] and now I'm afraid I made a mistake.", "post": "I've had my best friend [19 M] friendzoned for 4 years. We met when I was dating my ex, so I never really saw him as anything more than a friend. He's been there for me for everything. He's basically been in love with me since the moment we met. He would do anything for me if it meant that I would be happy. I never thought that I would have feelings for him like he has for me. That is until a couple months ago.\n\n I developed feelings for him, while also developing feelings for my current boyfriend, [21 M]. Everyone told me to give my best friend a chance, but I was afraid of losing our friendship in the process, and I had stronger feelings towards my boyfriend. So I told my boyfriend that I would date him, and now my best friend will barely talk to me and wants to kick my boyfriends ass. Also all my friends are mad at me for the decision I made. I regret not giving him a chance, but I feel like if we were to have dated, I should have feelings for only him, and not anyone else. My boyfriend said he would fight my best friend if that's what he really wants, but I don't want them fighting over me. I'm afraid I lost my best friend and made a mistake in not choosing him, now I don't know what to do. Any advice Reddit?", "summary": "Chose boyfriend over best friend. Now best friend wants to kick boyfriends ass. I'm afraid I made a mistake not choosing my best friend."}
{"id": "t3_g6dno", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the male equivalent of flowers?", "post": "Basically, I want to do something sweet and romantic for my boyfriend. Here's the long version: \n\nAccording to the weather forecasts, it's going to be a beautiful day today. My boyfriend and I decided to go to a local park we've been meaning to visit for months - the weather just hasn't been nice enough until today. The park's right near a relatively swanky area, and since today's payday and we haven't had a \"date night\" in a while, we decided to get a pseudofancy dinner afterwards. I'm really looking forward to it. Things haven't always been easy or simple in our relationship, but I think we have a really good foundation and we're really making sure we put time in with each other to maintain it.   \n\nWith that in mind, I'd really like to do something special and sweet for him. He's more of a romantic type than I am, so I think he would appreciate it. However, I'm not sure what to do - if the situation were reversed, and I was a boy wanting to surprise a girl, I'd definitely get flowers. But I don't think that'll have the same effect...call me crazy if I'm wrong :) So I was wondering if Reddit could do me a favor and weigh in on what they think the equivalent of flowers are, for a guy. Suggetions are welcome! It's not a special event like an anniversary or anything, just a night out. I'd really love to hear what you have to say on this: I want to surprise him AND get him something (do something for him) he'll really appreciate.   \n\nI know some people are going to respond to this with \"sex\" or \"bj,\" but if you can help it, please refrain. He's already going to get laid tonight, and probably getting blown for foreplay. I want to do something _besides_ that. (Or on top of that, heh.) Besides, I don't think sex should be a special-occasion-I-love-you surprise. That implies some shitty things about your love life, imo.    \n\nThanks for reading...please help me out!", "summary": "going out for a date with the bf. want to do something special for him. please don't say \"sex,\" etc...that's already on the menu. let's go above and beyond here!"}
{"id": "t3_j5pf5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the single funniest moment you've ever experienced?", "post": "I have one that stands out from all of the rest.\nI was 13; Me and 2 friends were at a minor league baseball game in the mediocre city of Columbia, SC. It was a diabetes benefit game that had rides and games set up out in an open area by left field, which included a bouncey-house thing and an enormous inflatable water slide contraption. At around half time, me and my dickhead friends decided it would be hilarious if we unplugged the bouncey-house while nobody was looking.  Nobody was remotely near it so we figured it would just a quick laugh and nothing dangerous.  My friend J pulled the plug out from a power strip on the ground, and we waited for about 5 minutes for something to happen, but nothing did.  We were just turning to get back to our seats when literally hundreds of parents started screaming and running to the giant waterslide behind us.  It had tipped over on its side and about 30 small children were clinging to the side as it deflated on top of them.  Terrified, we fled the stadium and sat outside.  A firetruck and 2 police cars showed up, so we ran and hid in the woods behind the parking lot.  An hour later, we returned to the stadium and learned that everyone was okay.  I laughed for so long and so hard that I was sore for days after.", "summary": "Me and some friends collapsed a giant water slide at a baseball game.  Somehow nobody got hurt...Funniest shit ever"}
{"id": "t3_ghcem", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What can you do if your company you paid for your domain name let it lapse just one month after you paid for it?", "post": "A bit of back story.  I have been using this company to register my domain and host my site for years.  Its a little site, nothing special, just my home business.  I am really attached to my domain name, so when I returned to school I kept up payments but didn't keep much of a website (just the basic info on some pages, more brags than business)\n\nThe company billed me for the hosting automatically.  That reminded me I should update a couple of pages.  It was gone, and it was parked!  I did a whois and found they bought it less than a month after I paid last year for two years.  I did update a couple of pages after I paid last year so it was working for a bit.  \n\nI contacted the company and they were snarky.  They said that the CC payment hadn't gone through on the 24th of may.. which was true, for some reason the CC company thought using the CC online was suspicious, due to the fact it had never been used for that before.  It was cleared up and worked the next day.  I pointed out to them that the second payment had gone through.  Got a snarky reply that I had no idea what I was talking about and I must not have got the \"it didn't work email\"\n\nSo the CC was contacted and provided a statement for that month, which clearly shows the payment went through and was charged to the account.  Armed with this knowledge I emailed them back saying I had the statement, and would a scan do or did they need it mailed to them.\n\nThat was 2 weeks ago.  What should I (can I) do?  I am just so bummed I really liked that domain name.", "summary": "I paid for two years hosting, they took my money didn't renew my domain name.  What, if anything can I do.  Bummed my name is now parked."}
{"id": "t3_4kimto", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (27/F) fooled around with a boy(25) that I like, but just met two weeks ago - do we talk about it?", "post": "My roommate introduced me to his newest coworker about two weeks ago, and he's become a regular visitor and occasional overnight guest at the house ever since. We get along pretty well, and I think he's really cute. Definitely someone I would love to have in my life in some manner or another. I feel as though he's everything I've been wanting in a guy, but it's also a little early to make that call. Perhaps it's just the loneliness talking. We haven't spent much time with just the two of us.\n\nAnyway, we're all kind of transient in our living situation at the moment - he's camping and I'm sharing an RV with my two roommates (a couple). It was snowy a few nights ago, so he crashed with us. I offered to share the couch bed so he didn't have to sleep on the floor (really just a ploy to cuddle). \n\nWell, I was just planning on cuddling, but the next thing I know he's slyly moving his arm around my waist, and hinted for me to make a move. I didn't object. One thing leads to another and we end up fooling around. \n\nIt was great, and I'd totally do it again. I want to have this kid in some way, be it FWB, casual dating, or a long term relationship. Thing is, neither of us have mentioned it yet, and I'm not sure if I should? We've just been carrying on like nothing ever went down, but I'm afraid if it doesn't get brought up, I'll miss my opportunity. I also can't really read how he's feeling about it. \n\nWhat the hell do I say to him? Anything? Suggest we do it again? Send him a sexy text message? Keep quiet and wait for him? I'm bad at boys.", "summary": "I messed around with a guy, and I'd like to either do it again or date him, but I don't know if/how to address the elephant in the room."}
{"id": "t3_99p0e", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My 10 year wedding anniversary is coming up and, unfortunately, we'll be totally unable to have any sort of real celebration. What can I do?", "post": "So, long story short, we've been together more than 15 years, married for 10, no kids yet, and we love to travel. We've always traveled kind of thriftily, but I was planning a 10 Year Balls-to-the-Wall something or other until we got a little bad news: she needs back surgery, and she needs it fairly quickly. I started working to move my plans up on the calendar, no matter what the changes cost me, but then I found out that she's on strict orders not to travel while awaiting surgery. FML.\n\nHer recovery time will be a small number of months, but in the mean time I'd like to commemorate the date with something a little more special than a really nice dinner, etc. To make matters more complicated, the surgery is only a few days after our anniversary date and it's happening in another city (Houston), so we'll be several hundred miles from most of our friends and all of our family except for her parents.\n\nAnd I have absolutely no idea what to do. I've looked into getting some of our friends to come down and have some sort of a party, but I couldn't get anywhere with that for a variety of reasons (not least of which was the aforementioned hundreds of miles of travel). I've rescheduled our whirlwind trip for as soon as she can reasonably be expected to be capable of travel, but that won't be for several months.\n\nWhat can I do?", "summary": "She's having surgery on our 10th anniversary and we'll be in a largely unfamiliar city (Houston). I have a very expensive trip planned, but it'll have to wait several months. What to do to celebrate RFN?"}
{"id": "t3_2oqccj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 M] boyfriend and I [20 F] have been dealing with alcohol/cheating related issues...", "post": "So my boyfriend and I have been together for around 7 months now....it's pretty serious and we're really in love. I can't imagine being with anyone besides him. We get along beautifully and he always knows how to make me feel better. \n\nHowever, the first two weeks of school, one when I was here and one when I wasn't, my boyfriend got so incredibly black out drunk and cheated on me twice.\nHe has a history of alcoholism in his family and he has always been a heavy drinker, so his blacking out is not uncommon.\nIn the first instance he was at school a week before it started so he was just partying. He got so drunk that a girl who raped him last year (before we were together) I guess found him again and the same situation played out. They had sex but he really didn't remember until this past week. \nThe other situation was him being blackout when I stayed in and his phone died so he couldn't answer my messages or calls and he called me at 4 AM from the floor of his apartment looking for me asking me where he had been all night and I, of course, couldn't answer. Turns out he had seen his ex girlfriend and she gave him a blowjob.\nIt honestly disgusts me so much that that happened but I have always chalked it up to his drinking. He's getting better with it, but now it just causes all of our fights because he is so ridiculous when he drinks.\n\nI am not sure what to do....", "summary": "my boyfriend has history of alcoholism in his family and drinks heavily, we have great relationship except when he drinks and has cheated on me twice while under the influence; what the fuck do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_mu564", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help with bringing a pseudo-outdoor cat indoors?", "post": "This cat currently lives on our front porch as our outdoor cat, we acquired him pretty recently. He was abandoned by a neighbor's brother, and has more than likely only been an outdoor cat for a few months. He wants to come inside desperately, and we want to let him inside. He's fully clawed, so we're worried he might tear the place up, and also wondering if he'd take to a litterbox. We could always get him declawed, but the housetraining thing is my real concern. He's extremely friendly and obviously very accustomed to people, and has always been very well-behaved when we let him indoors to warm up (winter is approaching in my neck of the woods). Any thoughts or tips?", "summary": "Want to bring outdoor cat (that was previously an indoor cat) inside, worried it will scratch everything up and piss everywhere."}
{"id": "t3_4lsll4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 F] am still thinking about my ex-boyfriend [23 M] of 5 years almost everyday. How can I move on?", "post": "My boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me in early April. It came out of left field for me but apparently he hadn't been feeling the same about me for a while. There were no signs as far as I could tell, everything seemed normal. We had even hung out the previous weekend and everything was fine. Maybe I was missing the signs.\n\nAnyway, since then I have not been able to stop thinking about him almost every single day. I'm not depressed or unable to enjoy life (surprisingly since i've battled depression and anxiety in the past) and am even having some really awesome things happen in my life. But he's always in the back of my head. I think the way he broke up with me really messed with me. I'm mostly confused and disappointed as to why and how he ended things.  \n\nHis explanation was all over the place and although we met a week after he broke up with me to clear things up, I still have a ton of questions that I feel deserve answers. \n\nMy question is, is it best to just continue what I'm doing which is focusing on other things like work, family, friends, myself, etc.? Or should I try to contact him to get a better explanation of what went wrong?\n\nWe had said we would try to remain friends but we both needed time and agreed that when we were ready we would contact the other person.", "summary": "Boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me very suddenly. Left me feeling confused. It's been almost 2 months. Should I just focus on myself or try to reconnect to clear things up? "}
{"id": "t3_2w5djb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] recent ex [23M] of 3 year relationship suddenly has an attitude about moving out. I am so uncomfortable. What should I do?", "post": "My boyfriend of 3 years was blatantly ignoring me and apathetic and I decided to break up with him because I was the only one putting effort into keeping the relationship together. He hurt me (flirting with exes, lying, trying to berate me) way too often and enough was enough. We live together, but he said he would be the one to move out since I'm recovering from an injury and I have fish that would be a pain to move. I told him I want to cut ties and I do not want to talk to him anymore. I do not want to be his friend.\n\nI have heard him sobbing in the other room almost every night since the breakup. We have exchanged some letters but his letters don't make sense. He keeps saying he loves me and he doesn't know what he wants... That his emotions say he's \"making a continuous mistake\" but he is trying to be rational and needs space. He doesn't seem to accept the reality that I am DONE. It's over. I'm ready to move on. I feel like I don't love him anymore. \n\nTonight I confronted him because my alternative plan fell through. He said that moving out was not a priority for him. He was very cold about it and seemed to be putting on an act. Is he trying to get in a last ounce of control? \n\nWhat are my options? I live in a city where it is hard to find decent rent prices. My cousin agreed to move in with me here, but my ex doesn't seem to want to leave. I need to give my landlord 30 days notice before leaving. I feel like I should just give her the notice tonight and abandon the apartment and just settle wherever I end up. I could squeeze into a studio but I'm a student and would be paying way more than I am now. I might reach out to my family to help fund an apartment by myself.\n\nWhat should I do?", "summary": "I broke up with my boyfriend a week ago and we agreed he would be the one to move out. Now he's changed his mind and it feels like having an unstable stranger in my apartment."}
{"id": "t3_1debqs", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (20f) am having a hard time coping with my baggage", "post": "I have the greatest boyfriend (19m) in the world right now. He is thoughtful, kind, he does everything in the world to make me feel important and special and I try to do the same for him. We have been together for about eight months now.\n\nHowever right around the time we met I was exiting a really bad relationship that ended in me terminating a pregnancy. My current SO knows that that happened, and accepts me for who I am now, which given my past might be more then I deserve. On top of that from about feb-mid april my hormones were really nuts causing me to just be what felt like a shadow of who I was, but after some recent medication I feel a million times better.\n\nI suppose my problem is that a part of me wants to run away from this relationship because I think I might have jumped into it too soon. But I know I truly love my SO and I'm afraid if I tell him what I'm feeling he will take it the wrong way and it will hurt him. I know that communicating what I'm feeling would be the best thing for us, but I just don't know how to have that conversation.", "summary": "I goofed up in the past, my SO accepts me. I may have rushed into things and I want to talk about it with him, but I don't know how without hurting feelings."}
{"id": "t3_2aajb0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my GF[20F] When would you stay with crazy?", "post": "I'll try to keep it somewhat brief. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years. Once we were dating for awhile I realized she wasn't the most stable person... at all. She had very bad depression, anxiety, and migraines. She also gets jealous easily, has trust issues, and is slightly overweight. It took me a long time and a lot of effort to get her to go to her doctor to start taking meds. I tried to get her to see a therapist as well, but she only ended up going a few times and then gave up. When we were in college together still, her depression/anxiety was so bad that she gave up on going to classes and flunked out. She doesn't have her license, she currently works a minimum wage job and it's been 1-2 years since she's been in college. She was supposed to go last spring but that didn't work out, and she's supposed to go an upcoming semester but I'm not sure if she'll follow through. Her family is also pretty crazy which doesn't help the whole situation.\n\n---\n\nI see many people give the advice of leaving someone who seems depressed or has anxiety because \"they're crazy.\" I don't really see these people as crazy unless it's a serious case and they're doing extremely immature, insane things. To me, it seems a little rude to just assume they're crazy and tell people to run away. For whatever reason I decided to stay and help her instead of running away. She's definitely improved a lot, but still has some issues. I guess I cared about her enough to spend a lot of my time and energy to stay and help. My question to you is: When would you stay with \"crazy\"? What would make you stay, what would make you leave?", "summary": "Everyone seems to say \"seems crazy leave\" in a lot of the posts I read. When would you stay?"}
{"id": "t3_4cfqow", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "**A personal finance tax, income, and asset brain teaser**", "post": "Surveying /r/personalfinance for possible creative solutions or interesting perspectives on a unique situation. \n\nThe subject is a 62 year old widow. Here are the measurables:\n*Assets*: $800,000 in real estate. A primary and secondary residence of approximately equal value. Approx $1,200,000 in relatively liquid assets, roughly $700,000 of which are in tax-deferred accounts. \n\n*Income*\n*~85,000 (before taxes)\n\n*Expenses*\nSubject makes an approximately $1,200 contribution to a tax deferred account each month, but otherwise spends almost all or most of her income to maintain the lifestyle to which she is accustomed. This includes upkeep of both properties, travel, and general enjoyment.  It is unlikely that a change in lifestyle is possible. The vacation property is rented on occasion. \n\nHere is where it gets interesting: Subject has approximately **$400,000** in a tax loss carry forward.  Subject's investments have not been performing terribly well as of late and subject does not have much in the way of capital gains to offset the tax-loss carry forward. Additionally, Most of subjects liquid assets are in tax deferred accounts.  Subject has about $570,000 in a taxable account. \n\nSubject would need to realize an approximately 80% gain in the taxable account to use up all of the tax loss (in addition, $3,000 each year of the tax loss can be applied to ordinary income). \n\n**Questions**\n1) How can subject position herself to make the best use of her tax loss?\n2) How should subject be allocating her assets to maintain her lifestyle and prepare for retirement? She plans to work 8-10 more years.", "summary": "A 62 year old widow has a lot of assets, a decent income which she spends almost all of, and $400,000 in tax losses that currently can't be used, what does she do? "}
{"id": "t3_ysa6j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M/18]Should he really be mad about what I[F/18] just asked about?", "post": "My bf and I have been together 2 years. We are currently in a LDR and he is in Hawaii but possibly moving back soon. Haven't seen him in 3 months. \n\nThis isn't even a big deal. Of course I get jealous of him talking to other pretty girls...but really, who doesn't? \n\nSo, I was on Facebook and it constantly pops up on my newsfeed that he is liking all these other pictures of these girls he is friends with. (Note: most of his friends are girls. He has always been that way AND he has had huge crushes on all of them at one point in time before we started dating.) And I was a little jealous because I want more attention from him. So, out of curiosity, I asked about it. At first he said he didn't like any pictures. But then he said his brother does it most of the time.(His brother goes on his account often) Then he got really pissed at me over it. I didn't even sound mad about it. I kinda made a joke out of it when I asked. It's just frustrating because now he won't talk to me.", "summary": "I asked my bf why he seemed to be obsessively liking other girls pictures and he got mad. Did I go too far? or did he?"}
{"id": "t3_3sky5n", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Job change question", "post": "Hello everyone, I hope that you guys can give me some guidance on an important decision I have to make. I have been working for 11 months at a big accounting firm. My background is in IT and wanted to do something more closely related to technology. I started interviewing and I received an offer for $7K more than what I am currently making. This came as great news, except I just learned that HR is going to get me an opportunity within my current firm to do something a lot cooler but I'd keep the same salary. The problem with the new offer is the distance to my current place and where my SO lives. I live currently close to Downtown and she lives 30 minutes south, the new job would be 40 minutes north west of where I currently live. Just before I got the offer I was looking to move closer to her, but that would mean about 1.5 hrs of driving every day. I have made numbers and the raise covers the price of gas. Is there anything I should do in addition to that to be able to make a better decision? I feel like if I stay at my current firm I'll be able to get an even bigger raise if I move out in the next few years, but not sure that this is the case. I'm confident since unemployment numbers are steadily going down every day. What would you do?", "summary": "Got an offer 1.5 hrs away from where I want to move to that is $7K higher than what I currently make. Not sure if I should make the move because of all the driving."}
{"id": "t3_2ne0g2", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I've only ever liked 1 girl, and i can't get over her?", "post": "Hi. I'm 23, male.\n\nI knew her since i was like 14, she was a year younger than me. We used to hang out almost daily for years - she lived just down the road from me. We were really good friends, and our friendship lasted until i was about 19. I was a really naive teen, and never realized she had feelings for me, even though she gave some massive signals. \n\nI had strong emotional feelings for her too, but i didn't really understand them at the time. I was a late bloomer. I went through a lot of hardships  and i slipped into a bit of a destructive state. I ended up pushing her away, i did it to protect her, but it ruined our friendship. I imagine she hates me now. \n\nI've only seen her once since (been 5 years), and we both completely blanked each other. I haven't attempted to contact her or anything, i could quite easily, but i don't want to talk to her and find out she hates me now. I still think about her a fair bit, and even have dreams about her. (non sexual). I know it's weird, but i'm not stalking her or involving her in any way so it's not hurting, right? \n\nWell, that's the past. The present is the problem. I don't feel attracted to anybody, sexually or emotionally. I have options, i'm not bad looking and i get interest on nights out, and a couple of friends who like me. But none of them interest me. \n\nI know this is really pathetic, but i don't know what to do. I want to get over her, but i still have the problem of not finding anyone else attractive. I've only slept with one girl ever, and weirdly, she looked a lot like the girl i liked. Still the sex was no more enjoyable than masturbating, and was all very average.", "summary": "Used to have a big crush, pushed her away, regret it horribly - haven't spoke to her for 5 years and still obsessed with her. Don't find anyone else attractive."}
{"id": "t3_22e1xh", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Am I an asshole or wrong to stay friend with my straight best friend of 4 years (22M) if I'm (21M) gay?", "post": "I'm gay. Just came out. I'm 22. My best friend for years has been a straight guy.\n\nI don't let my orientation define me. I hate saying I'm gay. But I always think about this. \n\nI've crushed on him since the day I've met him. I've just dealt with it since he means a lot as a friend. Usually I don't associate with crushes for the heartache. But this time I am. \n\nI feel bad because no matter how much I try not to its just biology that my feelings for him will change how I act as a friend. I'm naturally just gonna feel a bit different around him because of the attraction. \n\nWe tell each other everything. Our relationship is reciprocal. We hang out. Text every day. Make sure we see each other when we both busy. We share feelings. He talks about his girlfriends with me, etc. I try to protect him and be a friend and he protects me too, but I can't help but feel like I wish I could have him. I don't let those feelings change how I act though. \n\nHe knows I'm gay and doesn't care. He knew a year ago before I told anyone. \n\nI just feel like an asshole if I'm going to try to find a boyfriend but in my head I love another guy I still see and talk to all the time. \n\nI always make male friends. I like them more. But I always crush on them eventually. I have a lot of love. I feel like this is wrong too.\n\nI get told its weird, cheating, wrong, etc. And I get told to find new friends and a real boyfriend. \n\nI feel like I'm doing something really wrong and that our relationship is extremely weird compared to most other peoples friends.", "summary": "I'm gay and trying to figure out if keeping my straight best friend I crush on is healthy or makes me an asshole or would be cheating if I'm going to get a boyfriend?"}
{"id": "t3_d3y40", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My boyfriend wants to hang out with someone he used to have a crush on.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for almost six years, and we're in college now. When he was a junior in high school (we had been together for 3 years around this time), he developed a crush on a girl in his class. He liked her for a while, and didn't tell me until 6 months later, when he was \"kind of getting over it.\" It's been years, and he hasn't really spoken to her, but today she IMs him out of nowhere and asks him to go with her to get her tattoo. He accepted and then told me about it. Although she is not into men, this has caused me some distress. Am I being paranoid?", "summary": "My boyfriend wants to hang out with a girl he had a crush on in high school, but has since gotten over, should i be worried?"}
{"id": "t3_37dw6r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my GF [25 F], duration 9 months, girlfriend is hanging out with a guy who likes her and it's making me really jealous", "post": "My girlfriend (25) and I (28) started going out about 9 months ago. We moved in together after about a month or so and it didn't work out. We broke up after about 6 months because neither of us were happy. About a month after we broke up we started hanging out again and found that we both still really cared for each other and became FwB. After a couple of those sessions we had a talk about what we were doing and how we were feeling. Long story short we decided that we wanted to make the relationship work and to take it slow. We also told each other the people that we had hooked up with while we were on break so to be completely honest with each other. \n\nOne guy she hooked up with really liked her and asked her out. They knew each other through work and initially she thought he was gay (this was when we were dating the first time). \n\nFast forward to last night she told me that he'd called around 8.30 and they'd spoken on the phone for about 90 minutes, mostly about work, some about me and some about other stuff. I have been really unsettled by this since she told me. She called and we talked about it on the phone but I still can't shake this feeling of jealousy. Thoughts?", "summary": "Girlfriend hanging out with guy and I'm getting jealous because I know he likes her and they've hooked up in the past"}
{"id": "t3_3c0rrs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] and my SO [21F] are having issues because of her sister [23F].", "post": "Basically my GF and I are fighting because her sister does not want her to move to the city that I live in. My GF wants to pursue school and her sister is trying to make her stay at their hometown.\n\nShe insists that her sister is limiting her opportunities, which for her is becoming a celebrity in anyway possible, and that going to school will end it. Of course this makes me rage because I and my GF believe that school would be a better option.\n\nI am not sure what to do because I am trying to respect her sister. But I am on the verge of raging and telling her what I really think. She tries to pursue unrealistic dreams by basically selling herself to 60 year old millionaires.", "summary": "my GF [21F] and I [23M] are having relationship problems because of her controlling sister [23F] who despises me"}
{"id": "t3_4etjlm", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(FL) Cashier won't do her job properly. I want to fire her but HR says no because of religious reasons.", "post": "Hi, legaladvice. I can't believe I'm in this situation.\n\nI was recently promoted to Store Manager of a grocery store after the original manager quit (I was assisstant manager before for about 6 months).\n\nWe hired a woman, let's call her Sally, a couple of weeks ago. She's not terrible at her job (just basic cashier stuff) but she refuses to process payments that equal $6.66. I know, it sounds crazy.\n\nOur store prices everything ending in 28 cents as a ploy (kinda like Brandsmart). So anything priced at $6.28 will ring up to $6.66 after tax, and it happens quite often that people will buy just that one item (which I've learned after Sally started working here).\n\nEvery time this happens, one of the managers or supervisors has to take over because she refuses and sometimes it throws a spanner in the works. I brought it up with HR and they said I can't do anything about it because it's her religious freedom (since 666 is the number of the beast in Christianity).\n\nThe thing is, we have the same religion; we even go to the same church! But I don't think she should be able to use that excuse to not ring those transactions. I've offered to move her to another part of the store but she doesn't want to stock or do anything else.\n\nHR warned me not to decrease her hours or I'd get in trouble, but I just don't see how I can do my job properly if I have to take care of petty stuff like this.\n\nIs there a law or something that says I'm right? I don't want to go back to HR without knowing I'm 100% right that she shouldn't have the job if she can't perform all aspects of it.\n\nAnd if I'm wrong, I suppose I can bear it even if I do think it's ridiculous.", "summary": "Employee does not process payments of $6.66 due to her religion, HR says I cannot fire her even though it's a major inconvenience and we have to get someone else to do it each time (multiple times a day)."}
{"id": "t3_456xec", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I (23/f) leave the man I love (27/m) to take my dream job halfway around the world?", "post": "So I have just under 48 hours to make a decision that could forever alter the course of my life.\n\nI've been offered a financially lucrative position in a beautiful country that I believe I could enjoy living in. Personally, things aren't so great at home, so were it not for my boyfriend, I would be jumping at the offer.\n\nI've been in an on-again/off-again relationship for four years. He was my first kiss, first everything. I fell hard and never really got back up. We recently decided to try dating again after about a year of pretty much dating without the label.... however, I don't think a relationship (not just with me, with anyone) is what he wants. I think I pressured him into it.\n\nSo I have this offer. This dream job. But on the other hand, I have a chance at stability and finally being with the man I love more than my own life. I've never lived in a foreign country and honestly the thought terrifies me. But... what if I stay here? What if the relationship doesn't work out and I'm left here wondering.... what if? for the rest of my life? What if I move and, again, I'm wondering what if? but this time about the relationship?\n\nI really just don't know what to do. I'm so torn. I can't eat or sleep, it's almost some sort of cosmic joke. Why would this offer come right when I have a chance with the person I've dreamed of for years? I just... I don't know what to do.", "summary": "Trying to decide whether to leave the man I love and everything familiar to me to take a job in another country (a year-long contract; I don't see him waiting for me)."}
{"id": "t3_2hgad5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with the guy I've been seeing [22 M], unsure because of mixed signals", "post": "This guy and I have been hanging out for 3 months now. We work together and have known each other for a few years before that. \n\nIt started off as a once or twice a week hang out where we would also have sex. He eventually asked me out on a date, we went to the movies and dinner, for which he paid, even though I tried to offer. From there it escalated to texting, even briefly, everyday and for the past few weeks we have been hanging out three or four times a week. He is super affectionate and is always doing things to help me, whether it be at work, or smaller things when we have been hanging out. \n\nI'm currently confused though because we hung out Monday night at his house and we were both super tired, so we did not really get into any deep conversations. We just kinda hung around, watched tv, and eventually fell asleep. Usually we will hang out every other day or so or at least there will have been an effort to do so. I texted him last night to see what he was doing, and he responded that he was in a weird mood and feeling under the weather. I responded saying that I hope he felt better thinking that was the end of the conversation. He asked if I was doing anything yet for the night, and I said I didn't have any plans, but that I just thought of hanging out with him. He responded \"I was planning on that too earlier, sorry :(\".\n\nI am just at a loss of what to think. Am I overthinking this and he just is having a bad week? Or could this be the beginning of a fade? I guess I'm just also disappointed because his dad is gone for the week and he has the house to himself, so I wrongly assumed I guess that we would be hanging out more than once, which I am also worried is clouding my judgment of the situation.\n\nShould I even bother trying to text him again to hang out? Or just give him space and wait to see if he contacts me?", "summary": "Guy I'm seeing is sending me mixed signals, is it just me overthinking things or is he possibly not interested?"}
{"id": "t3_2onahv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My long-distance GF[17F] wouldn't tell a guy(who apparently has a huge crush on her) that she's in a relationship with me[19M] so he could buy her gifts, and wouldn't tell me of this. Was I crazy to be upset?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 6 months now and everything always goes fine between us. We made it a point to always be honest with each other no matter what, and I have always been faithful to that.\n\nI found out from a mutual friend of ours that a guy she knows has a very big thing for her and has been into her for a while now. I was unaware. This mutual friend also told me that this guy bought my girlfriend gifts, and she told me her mother bought them for her. The reason he buys her gifts is because she's not telling him that she's in a relationship with me, so he's been trying to woo her over. Quite frankly, I was hurt she was keeping our relationship a secret, especially to guys who like her.\n\nShe lied to me about the gifts and refused to tell me about all this because she wanted to avoid a conversation about it. Was I right or wrong to be upset about this whole ordeal?", "summary": "GF won't tell a guy who likes her that she's with me so he could buy her gifts, and wouldn't tell anything."}
{"id": "t3_4ek607", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Family using painful nickname and i want them to stop. [25F] [24F] [28F]", "post": "My Uncle passed away last week. I loved him like a father and he helped pay for my college. He called me 'Ladybug' as a nickname and always has. Since he has passed, I just don't want to be known by that. My sister [28F]  [24F]and cousin have been calling me this because it reminds them of him. \n\nWe got into an argument over it. I told them I don't want to be called Ladybug, it's something special I shared with my Uncle. I want to be known as Ellie, like they have called me for [25 years]. \n\nI am not really willing to compromise on this. At this point I kind of want to take a break from them. I am mourning and they keep reminding me of him in painful ways. \n\nAny idea how to handle this?", "summary": "My uncle called me a special nickname, now my sister and cousin are using it. It bothers me and I want them to stop."}
{"id": "t3_4iv5od", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [27 M] GF [25 F] of 3 years just told me she has problems with sex because of past relationships", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been sleeping together since the beginning of our relationship, and recently I've started trying to gently introduce more in the bedroom. she's always had a toy, but i've been trying to introduce more positions and experiences to make things a little more fun.\n\nthe other day we started fooling around and she abdruptly stopped me saying she didn't like anything I was doing (same thing I always do), she doesn't like making out, and she doesn't want anything new. She completely shut down and wouldn't say another word to me after this.\n\nthe next day she text me saying that she's had \"really terrible relationships, including really scary sex\" and that \"she has a problems with sex because of past relationships\"\n\nI'm not sure where to go from here, she won't talk about it, I also now have no idea what she wants in bed (she says normal sex is all she wants). Ideally I'd like for her to heal in some way and open up with me. Should we stop having sex all together for a while? I could suggest her see a therapist but I imagine that not going well.", "summary": "Girlfriend told me she's had relationships involving \"really scary sex\" which is keeping her from opening up and trying new things with me. Not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1xtykn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my ExGF [21 F] were together 5 Months, Dez. last year we broke up, now she texts me one day before Valentines Day", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nFirst of all, i want to excuse myself for any grammatical mistakes iam \n\ngoin to do here, english is not my motherlanguage :D.\n\nSince my ex gf and I broke up in Dezember (She tought we dont fit \n\ntogether... i thought the opposite thing... but okay..)\n\nwe had no contact, no calls, no messages,..\n\nAnd today out of nothing my ex gf send me a picture she took, with a\n\ncat who has a mustache. \"Like a sir^^, i had to think of you when i saw\n\nthis \", she wrote.\n\nAfter that we had a little smalltalk, until she wrote she is out right now \n\nand wishes me a good night.\n\nDo you think she send me the picture on purpose? Does she want that \n\ni make a move? I mean today is one day before valentines day.. I dont \n\nunderstand very much of women,but i think when a women does \n\nsomething like that, she would do this on purpose and not just out of the blue? \n\nAm i right on this?\n\nPLZ HELP ME :/", "summary": "ex gf send me a pic of a cat one day before valentines day,   should i make a move?"}
{"id": "t3_1yot9f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] am finding that when I meet a girl, I get turned off if I find out that they are in a sorority", "post": "So I'm in college and trying to meet as many people as possible.  For some reason, I tend to immediately get turned off if I find out that a girl is in a sorority.  I am personally not the most social person and don't really like going out to many parties, but that is exactly what a lot of these girls love to do.  \n\nSpecifically, there is this girl in one of my classes that I like and we get along really well, but she's in a sorority.  Let's say, for example, we started to date. I don't know how comfortable I would be knowing that she would be at these party's, while she, and many other guys, would be drunk. \n\nIs it in my best interest to not pursue girls who are in a sorority? Or do I have a false sense of what some of these frat and sorority parties are like and give it a shot?", "summary": "Tend to get turned off when I find out a girl is in a sorority, mainly because I dont necessarily enjoy parties very much and that's what a lot of sorority girls love to do."}
{"id": "t3_14zllz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27M] have been the lover of someone with Borderline Personality Disorder [26F]. Recently recognized all her symptoms of BPD so I need advice, possibly from those who have been in a similar situations.", "post": "For the last year, I have been in a very sexual relationship with this girl in whom I now see the symptoms of BPD. She's got a boyfriend and while I'm relatively open with my relationships, she gets extremely jealous. There were a couple of times where she tried to blame me for some problem that I really couldn't see myself at fault for. And then possibly as a revenge measure for me not giving a crap, she goes rebounding with some other guy (not even her bf). However after that in her calm episode, she regretted doing that on an impulse and even accepted that she might have BPD after we had a talk.\n\nSo now here's my problem. I'm a student of human behavior and after observing her behavioral patterns, researched a lot on BPD and Histrionic Personality Disorder. There were a few AMAs on Reddit as well and majority say to get out of there and cut all contact. Most of the guys there seemed to have been in serious relationships with the women in those instances. I'm in it for the amazing sex but people say that the manipulation will start setting in. I've already noticed that I've been investing more time with her over the last few months. \n\nShe's agreed to treatment so should I bother being a support figure for her since she's got a bf anyway? Or continue with the sexytimes til things get crazier?", "summary": "Fucking a girl with Borderline Personality Disorder (recognized this only 2 weeks back) for a year. Continue til things get crazy or leave immediately?"}
{"id": "t3_3cegxf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [27 M] long distance gf [24 F] is hanging with her ex [23 M]", "post": "We have known each other for a year, dating for 6 months.\n\nMy girlfriend moved back to her hometown 4 months ago, where her ex, who she dated for 5 years, also lives. We have been doing the long distance thing as best we can and I have even scheduled a trip out there.\n\nI recently found out she is getting texts from her ex all day long and even goes and hangs out with him. She and I talked about it and she assured me she doesn't like him anymore, but considers him a dear friend. She says that she is not interested in him, but she doesn't want to rock the boat and tell him to stop.\n\nI do not like this one bit. I of course do not want to giver an ultimatum, but I have tried saying I do not like it and she does not seem to get it only to tell me I have nothing to worry about. At this point I want to cancel the trip and say goodbye.\n\nMy question: Am I overreacting and need to grow up and get over it or should I just put an end to all of this drama and end it?", "summary": "my girlfriend is hanging with her ex and she doesn't seem to want to stop and I don't know if I am over reacting"}
{"id": "t3_2dvg2f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31F] with my Husband [38 M] 12 years/4 Married, Talking about divorce. Outside of infidelity, why did you get divorce?", "post": "My husband and I have been lightly talking about divorce for a while now but it looks like I may be going through with it soon. \n**Details:**\nMet in college. He worked the same job until we moved out of the country for 2 years after I got laid off. I've always earned more money, paid more for things, until we lived out of the country- he earned more money. I stayed at home, had baby. We're back in the states- hes getting degree and we're planning on going back overseas with his new degree so he can earn more money. He's now studying and I'm the only one working. I came back 5 months before him to try and get settled first. So we spent that time apart. He came back in Jan. 14.\n\nWe have a 19 month old and are currently under a lot of financial stress (I'm filing chapter 7 soon, 1 income), he is trying to start a new career (teacher) and we are living with my parents and teenage brother. We have little privacy and very little time to ourselves, with or without the baby. We sleep in separate beds often because of the baby and we barely have sex (maybe once every 3 months), we're both faithful however.\n\n So all these are all factors...but this weekend after letting him go out to meet with a lady that he met at a teachers thing and hang out with her at an art museum all day he came home with a migraine so I let him rest. This morning we go out for brunch and he's a complete asshole to me because I don't want him to rush our brunch/mess up my semi-planned day so he can go meet up with one of his students (male) and he mentions divorce again while in the car. This triggers me to get pissed and actually go online and look into filing. \nIt's hard to actually pull the trigger. I'm trying to figure out if it's the circumstancel that we're in (which is temporary but taking longer then planned) or if it's really just over. \n\nI'd just like to know what to do- How to figure out if this marriage is over or not.", "summary": "Couple in tough a financial/living situation, but after husband is rude all weekend I'm considering filing for a divorce /What would you do?"}
{"id": "t3_3q78l7", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Really like a great guy with herpes. What should I do?", "post": "Hi girls. Need some advice and never been in this position that I know of before. We've hung out for almost a month now. Never been sexual besides some kissing and light touching and he just recently told me he has had herpes for a while and for him it is very manageable. I could tell it was very hard for him to tell me. He is a big strong guy and had tears in his eyes telling me. He said he isn't on meds but he'd b willing to for sure. \n\nHe seems like such a great guy, he has a good job, is very attractive and we click so well. We are both in our late 20s. What should I do? I know the worst part of this disease appears to be the stigma and like one in five people\n\nOr so have it. I am scared to let him walk but obviously I don't want herpes myself. I just know if he didn't have this condition we could really be something. We have a ton of common interests and he seems to have a lot going for him. But I don't know what to do.  Any advice???", "summary": "Guy I really like has herpes. I don't as far as I know but I really like him. Not sure how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_16wwkl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (17m) don't know what to do about a pretty good friend (16f), of about 2 years, who's drifting away. Nothing romantic.", "post": "So I have a group of friends from a couple of schools who have formed around a few peoples friendships, basically hipsters and nerds, who just kind of ended up hanging around each other a bit, sharing a lot of interests , etc.\n\nAnyway my friend came into the group kind of latish and is always saying that she feels separate, coming from a completely different school from everyone else and says she recently got very socially awkward.\n\nShe had drifted away for almost a year and I hadn't seen her for months and months so I decided to message her a few times and just see how she was doing, if she wanted to keep talking or what.\n\nI helped her through some stuff as well as I could and she seemed to appreciate it. We kept talking and she annoyed me a few times, a combination of me having a couple of bad days and her being a bit stand offish. One of these times I unloaded a tonne of my issues onto her, basically telling her to fuck off and get off my back in a polite way. She messaged back very contritely and said she was always there for me.\n\nYet it doesn't seem like she is, she rarely starts conversations with me, about twice in the last 3 months and I just don't think she actually cares for me despite everything she says. Actions are worth more than words right? So currently, I've decided to stop talking to her. If she wants to talk to me, great. Otherwise as I'm the only one from the group she was talking to recently, after my 18th birthday party which I will invite her to because I've already said so, that'll be it for our friendship. Am I doi.g the right thing? I haven't really talked to her about this because I dont wanna be really needy and should I have to talk to her about it when she's ignored my problems other times?", "summary": "my friends drifting away. As much as I don't want to lose her I don't want to be needy or the only one in the friendship who cares. I'm going to start ignoring her unless someone has a better idea. "}
{"id": "t3_449vig", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25/F] with my fiance [25 M], tells me he's not sure if we should get married-wedding in less than 4 months.", "post": "We met in college and have been together for 6 years. Last summer we got engaged and we're planning a wedding for this coming summer. There have been a few ups and downs in our relationship- mainly I have an issue with him drinking and cheating on me in the past (it happened twice). He had a rough life growing up and not the greatest role models or guidance, so his coping skills occasionally include drinking, which really bugs me. I encouraged him to seek counseling instead of drinking and he did for a while, but then stopped. Also the cheating was very early on in the relationship and then once last year. He was extremely tearful and apologetic, so I (maybe naively?) forgave him.\n\nSo, fast forward to now. Things have been really great or so I've thought. He hasn't drank in at least 8 months and has been really taking care of his health. Until tonight I thought we were really happy. I was woken up to him being loud on the phone and I got up to ask him to be quiet. When I saw him I knew instantly he was drunk. We got in an argument and I shut down and left the room crying. He followed me and by this time he was also crying and saying he just \"didn't think he could do it anymore.\" And that he's not sure if it's the right thing to do. I asked why  and basically he said because he's never seen a successful marriage (true) and that \"someone better might come along.\" \n\nI am so heart broken. Obviously I know this conversation shouldn't have happened like that and in his state, but it did and now I don't know what to do. Is there any hope in this at all?", "summary": "fiance got drunk and said he wasn't sure he wanted to get married. Our wedding is four months away. Should we call it off?"}
{"id": "t3_14hijw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Today, I told a story about something that happened a long time ago, then talked to my brother about it and found out I wasn't actually there. Now I feel crazy guilty and may have overreacted.", "post": "I remember an event from my childhood with immense clarity. I saw an AskReddit about something similar today, and I told the whole story. What happened, how I was involved, how it felt, and how it ended up. I told them a fantastic story, one I'd never really gotten to tell before.\n\nI talked to my brother about it later. He got confused and informed me that I wasn't even there. I'd apparently overheard my parents talking about what had happened and dreamed about it. Then I assumed that dream was what really happened.\n\nI freaked out and logged back onto Reddit, only to find someone had figured out where it had happened. In a panic, I deleted my story of it altogether, and then deleted my account for good measure. I didn't want to get karma for it, and I didn't want that information out there.", "summary": "Misremembered an event from childhood, told Reddit, found out I wasn't even there, panicked, and deleted my account so as to not get undeserved karma. I'm an asshat."}
{"id": "t3_145i9v", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/m] I love a girl (19/f), but I'm in an atypical friendzone. Go for it or don't risk ruining the friendship?", "post": "She's amazing. Funny, super cute. She likes me, a lot, and we have a lot of physical contact. The problem is her family is super-Christian, and she, while not a fanatic, is very religious. I'm an atheist. It doesn't really bother her, and her religion doesn't really bother me. But it has restricted the bounds of our relationship.\n\nWe talked about the possibility of dating, and the way she sees it is that the relationship will never go very far, i.e. marriage. Not that she wants to go into a relationship only if she thinks she'll marry, but that she thinks that we can never break that barrier. She agrees that we'd be great together, and that we might date for years, but that eventually she KNOWS we would never go further than that.\n\nMy opinion is that we should take the happiness while we can get it. She doesn't want to go into a relationship knowing it will end, which seems pessimistic and a little illogical to me. Love is about risk, and in my opinion you go for it and if it hurts in the end, the happiness was worth it.\n\nI think that she thinks we're done talking about it, but I'm thinking about bringing it up again. Should I risk losing her friendship, which I don't really think would happen, but would be awful, in order to state my argument better?\n\nAdditionally, I'm totally not good enough for her.", "summary": "She doesn't want to go into a relationship knowing it will never go to marriage. I think we should take the happiness while we can get it. Risk the friendship to state my case better?"}
{"id": "t3_4zatih", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "after a year my [19/F] druze boyfriend [21/M] won't/can't tell his parents about me, and tells me we can't have a future, what should i do?", "post": "already posted but im looking for more advice.\n\nI am a non druze female who was in a relationship with a druze male, we dated for a year and for both of us it was our first love. Even though we're still young it truly feels like he's it for me and vice versa. However, recently we hit a crossroad and he decided to end things. Since in Druze culture you are unable to marry out of the culture and if you do you are no longer considered a druze, and then you and your family are looked down on and shunned in the community. However, some people i talk to say in druze culture it's different for guys and it may be acceptable for them to marry someone outside the culture. He doesn't really follow his religon/culture, he's just scared of how it'll affect his parents, he says he can't loose them or let them down. He doesn't want them to die unhappy, feeling like they failed. I really dont think they'd completely disown him, and i think he knows that, he just wants them to die content and they apparently can't if hes with someone outside the culture. But then if he chooses to abide his parents wishes he says he'll just be alone and not marry, meaning he isnt going to be happy... so confusing. But by being appart its destroying the both of us, im unable to move on and let go of him, i just can't give up hope. And he is regretting his choice everyday, but he's so torn. He tells me \"maybe one day we can be together but i can't bank on that\" which makes me feel like him and i can be, i can't let go.. I feel like hes just scared and he always stresses about the future, so maybe he's just having a quater life crisis? Any help of what we should do ? id really appriciate it, i dont think ill ever be able to get over him.", "summary": "druze and non druze relationship, don't know if we can have a future but we want one. if anyone is in the same situation or have any advice i'd truly appriciate it."}
{"id": "t3_1ocxvc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24M] my girlfriend [25F] of 1 year, doesnt trust me anymore", "post": "I've screwed up. \n\nI've been going out with her about a year and we have lived together about 6 months.\n\nI've told my girlfriend a few times that I would be home by a certain time on nights out by myself and for various reasons ended up being home much later.\n\nIt's happened a few times now and each time she gets more and more angry. \n\nThe first time I just stayed out because I was really drunk and I forgot what I'd told her. When I came home she was really upset and after a few days we made up and I promised to not let it happen again.\n\nThen a few nights ago I went out on my own, told her I'd be home by 1am.\n\nShe was skeptical but I was adamant that she could trust me and I wouldn't do what I did last time.\n\nBut I ended up getting lost, couldn't find the right bus (we're very low on money), then had to wait over an hour for a cab, and ended up getting home at 4am.\n\nNow she says she'll never believe a promise I make etc and she thinks I just went out to a club and didn't give a shit about her etc.\n\nI can't prove that I couldn't get home and I can see why it looks like what she thinks (that I just said fuck it and went out till 4am and took a cab home), even though I know it's not true.\n\nShe's now not talking to me, and last time she was this upset we almost broke up.\n\nHow can I fix this?", "summary": "went out solo, promised gf home by 1am, got lost, ended up home at 4am. She thinks I just got super drunk like last time and isn't talking to me and says she will never trust me"}
{"id": "t3_31g6t1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Tifu by leaving a shit storm", "post": "So I have been working at a restaurant known as Jimmy John's for the past 3 years. 2.5 of them being a manager.  For those who don't work at jj we get a visit from corporate once about every 4 to 6 weeks. The guys was a little late in coming but we had been preparing for him for the past week. Last night I had the luxury of closing with a new guy and a worker we hired about a month ago. I can usually close the store and get out around 945 with it looking good. Well last night having a new guy and having to do double the work we didn't get out till nearly 1030. I thought it looked good but I would come to find out the next morning that wasn't the case. I go in to pick up my phone charger and the look in the assistant managers eye could kill.  I thought he was going to break down and cry.  I then find out we got a low 80. Now I don't know what to do. I could have very well just cost everyone a 750$ bonus.", "summary": "I closed the store and thought it looked good but to find out it was bad and now I may have every manager upset about losing money."}
{"id": "t3_2cjxgn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "F(23)-Feeling hopeless.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for close to 4 years now, we have lived together for close to 2, and I feel like I have let myself go. When we first met, I was 20 pounds lighter and nearly never left the house without making sure I looked good. I took pride in the way I looked, now I hardly even wear makeup and even though my boyfriend loves me and constantly tells me how beautiful I am, I feel like I've let myself go and have no idea how to find the motivation to get back to finding myself again. I need help...I'm scared one day he will wake up and realize I'm not the fit, pretty girl he fell in love with.", "summary": "feel like I have let myself go since being in a long term relationship, I've lost the sense of worth and independence I had before. Suggestions? Feeling hopeless..."}
{"id": "t3_3yixlh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (28f) boyfriend (28m) watched porn excessively and was caught. Now I keep looking at his phone and invading his privacy out of insecurity. What do I do? Help! NSFW", "post": "Back story: we have been dating for 2 years. About a year and a half into our relationship I was checking his internet history just to find an old website with a recipe I made for dinner before. I usually don't mind my boyfriend watching porn. It's completely unrealistic to think guys don't fap. But I found out he had been messaging the girls on the subreddit complimenting them. I flipped out naturally because that was crossing the line. He said he was addicted to porn. He went to talk to a therapist who said he didn't need to be treated. I felt betrayed but still forgave him. \n\nFast forward 6 months: I find myself constantly needing to check his phone and computer to see if he watches it still or messages girls. I feel more insecure than ever. He caught me looking on his phone history. I was honest and told him that I was looking to see if he still is watching porn in random moments like he used to. What do I do? I don't like being like this. I want to trust him. I'm scared he is going to keep on doing it behind my back. \n\nAm I overreacting?", "summary": "my boyfriend messaged girls on sexy subreddits and I caught him. Now I'm wanting to check his phone and I hate myself for being like this. How do I move on?"}
{"id": "t3_3uqti1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Girl in friendship group [18/F] has randomly switched and friendzoned me[18/M] please help?", "post": "I've recently started uni, had eyes on this girl from the start, we got talking, flirting, (to be fair she said right from the start she didn't want a relationship, I wasn't phased by that though I did want something exclusive) but then we began to meet up a couple times, we kissed, texted everyday flirting, etc. but all of a sudden she's now decided she wants to call things off, we're in the same friendship group but this didn't affect us at the start and I think were both mature enough to not let that affect anything. She wont deny liking me but says since she doesn't want a relationship she doesn't want to carry on with what were doing.\nI had some bad news in the family recently and since I live away from them now I feel I sort of clung to her due to the affection she gave the past few days, I fear this has put her off.\n\n-----Most people you ask will say I'm attractive, confident and funny - I do not mean to come across arrogant it's just to give you an insight to what I'm like! She is a nice girl, a virgin, by the way, not a player-----\n\nThe question is, I really like her and I don't want things to go that easily, how can I sway her views, and look to atleast get a date and maybe more from her? I really don't feel up for the friendzone... Do I need to make her jealous, if so how? Or at least, how do I recover?", "summary": "We've been texting, flirting a lot recently and have also kissed, she's your traditional nice girl but has decided she'd rather be friends, I think I've been a bit needy recently, any way to recover?"}
{"id": "t3_w60yx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Whats your worst/best prank that back fired on you?", "post": "I was in high school and went all year without getting in trouble. (First year since 2nd grade...suspended, detention, write up...). Well, on april fools, my first class i convenced my teacher to write me up for punching my sisters best friend in the face. My mother would have believed this since we did not get along at all. I had the teacher sign it, the principle and the school officer. I then received premission from the principle to go home early as if i was suspended. I called my mother 20 minutes after school started at told her i was suspended for fighting. Assuming my mother would pick me up and ground me for the day until i told her the truth after school was out (so i could sleep all day)....I was wrong. My mother called the police on me to arrest me for assult. I had to explain to the officers and my mother it was a joke. I was grounded for 3 weeks becuase of this.", "summary": "I told my mother i was suspended for fighting on April fools day thinking i could go home and sleep the rest of the day, instead she called the police to arrest me for assult."}
{"id": "t3_4chqca", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girl [19F] is mad at me [19M] because I posted a picture of a different girl to my Snapchat.", "post": "All right. So this has a little backstory. The \"friend\" is someone I have been trying to date for the past month and a 1/2. She said yes to go out with me, but when I invite her out on a date, she says she wants to get to know me better before we jump in to anything.\n\nOk. I get that. We just start hanging out here and there. Get to know each other. I learn that she's had issues with her weight. It's a big problem for her. Not a problem for me. Fast forward to last Saturday (3/26), and she tells me that she's failing school and wants to focus on herself right now and isn't looking for a relationship. I was pretty broken up because it came out of nowhere and I thought things were going great.\n\nI've still talked to her these past few days like nothing happened. Nothing relationship related, though. Just talking. Then, yesterday (3/28) I posted a picture of a coworker of mine, whom she also knows, and my friend captioned it, \"Bae\" and it had a heart eyes emoji. Everyone knows that her and I always mess around and say things like that. She has a boyfriend and is not my type anyways.\n\nLast night, she sent me a snap that just said, \"Wow.\" Then she texted me that she deleted me off of all social media because I'm going to be posting things like that. I came back and I tried to explain that it was a joke and that we weren't in a relationship anyways and asked why it mattered.\n\nI asked a few of my friends about their opinion on the situation and they said she's just trying to control me. I just have no idea what I should do. Hell, I'm still confused and not sure how I really think about it.", "summary": "Girl I've been trying to date, but doesn't want a relationship right now, got mad when I posted a picture of another girl. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_2d3v90", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[Serious] What value are men to women?", "post": "This is a serious question, not a troll.  I've completed a stage of therapy, and my lesbian therapist has informed me I am not really lesbian or even that strongly bisexual, but instead I am emotionally unavailable.  She says I kept attracting gay and bisexual men because it was a way of telling and proving to myself I was open to dating men while also remaining safe.  She also said I tend to see relationships and men in very dire, pessimistic terms (she's correct), and am not yet open to seeing them positively.\n\nTherapist wants to begin the next stage with me and calls it healing my emotional unavailability.  \n\nI'm pretty scared and feel like it's worthless to even try.  Yep, I was completely over attracting gay guy after gay guy after mind game player after misogynist over psycho after headcase, but I feel \"healing\" this unavailability will just make me open to even worse exploitation.  So far I've experienced heterosexual men as brute, primitive, stupid, sex-obsessed oafs who prefer throwing a sports ball to interacting with women and see us only as dolls and toys -- or obsessive stalky maniacs who want to suffocate, smother and use women.  I know this is not healthy and not true.\n\nIf it's in you, Reddit, please in a serious, hopefully somewhat compassionate way list some ways heterosexual men are of value to heterosexual women.  I'll use these lists to work on my intellectual resistance to healing.  Right now I don't see any connection between women and men at all, I see no value whatsoever to men except as business partners and buddies, and I see marriage and other types of heterosexual relationships as women-exploitative.\n\n(And yeah, I know you'll see the opposite as just as horrible, but please skip those kinds of answers right now.  I'll just use those as fuel to further hate men.)\n\nInstead I want to see true ways men can be of value to women, so that when my resistance comes up in therapy over the next months I have a ready list I can confront my misandrist inner voice with.  For all compassionate, serious responses, REAL GRATITUDE.", "summary": "In therapy.  About to do emotional unavailability healing.  Scared.  Need a genuine list of ways men can be good for women so I can use them to re-open and heal.  Thank you <3"}
{"id": "t3_urxsh", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[22m] had sex with a person almost a year ago and got hpv. cant get over that fact and my dating life has been non-existent. need insight/advice", "post": "hello all. like the title says, i got hpv from a girl that i had been in love with for a long time. she didnt know about it till she went to her doctor and found abnormal cells in her uterus (yes, this is the strain that causes cancer :(\n\nlong story short, her and i went our seperate ways i have vowed to be a good person and not pass this on to anyone else. my dating and sex life has been non-existent and i just tried to focus on school/work to keep my mind off. now, im feeling very very depressed and lonely and i dont know how to deal with this situation.\n\ni have a prospect i really like. i just cant seem to get over this hurdle and let my feelings show in fear that i will hurt her. has anyone else dealt with this before? i could really use some advice.", "summary": "got the cancerous strain of hpv a year ago. no sex life. interested in this girl. dont want to hurt her. what do?"}
{"id": "t3_k74f4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "book about a cat that eats typewriter keys, shoelaces?", "post": "I had a book when I was a kid in the early or mid 80s ... about a cat that has a bad habit of eating shoelaces.  It tells a moral story about gluttony/overindulgence and the cat gets bigger and bigger.  I think it also ate typewriters, or maybe just the keys.  The cat's parents are involved at some point.  The cat is reproved -- maybe by a doctor? -- who convinces the cat to eat such treats in moderation.  There might have also been turnips?? but I might be confusing the turnip part with a different book.  The book ends with the cat losing weight, and he only *occasionally* indulges in a typewriter key.   I remember the drawings -- a cat with shoelaces hanging all out of its mouth, and I think there were a variety of typewriters and different-looking keys.  To my recollection the drawings were black and white, pen-style.  Obviously this book left an impression on me.  I was hoping to give it to my nephew as a present, but I can't find it anywhere.  You would think the terms \"cat\", \"typewriter\", \"shoelaces\" aren't usually combined and would easily point to something.  I can't believe this book isn't a hit that immediately pops up on Amazon or google.  I loved it enough to still be talking about it almost 30 years later.  My family thinks I'm crazy, but I don't think I'm even creative enough to make this up... \n\nReddit, can you please help me find this book?", "summary": "cat, typewriter, shoelaces, turnips?, gluttony-themed children's book.  Did I just dream it?"}
{"id": "t3_270x2m", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by eating Taco Bell and feeling the aftereffects", "post": "Back when I was about 13, I was absolutely insane for Taco Bell. We decided to eat there after a long day of soccer and I ordered my grand 3 hard tacos combo and ate up.\nLater that night, the tacos thought it would be a fine-ass idea to retaliate and make me feel worse than Billy Ray Cyrus felt about the progression of his shit daughter Miley. Trying to ignore the wrenching stomach pains, I went to bed and expected to wake up fine in the morning. \nI woke up at about 3AM, stomach pains pounding in my interior.\nWell, knowing things couldn't be good, I expected to puke. Being the lazy-ass thirteen year old I was, I thought \"fuck-it, Ill hold it in and go back to bed.\". Well, what a great idea that I pulled out of my ass.\nMinutes later, puke gushed out of my mouth like Niagara Falls, hitting the left side of my bed and forming a nice pile.\nStill being the lazy-ass thirteen year old I was, I dismissed the idea of cleaning it up right now and thought \"Hell, I need some sleep, I'll just do it in the morning.\"\nSo I went back to a peaceful slumber.\n\nThe next morning, I awoke with a disgusting stench and finally comprehended what had gone on the night before. I looked to where the puke should have been, but there was only an orange stain and a bit of chunky leftovers there. Fuck you, Taco Bell.\nI immediately look down and see puke all over my blankets, clothing, and even bare skin. Being the movement-filled sleeper I am, I must have rolled around in the pile of puke during my sleep and successfully got it all over my bed sheets and body.\nFeeling defeated, I shamefully took a long ass shower that morning and washed my bed sheets.", "summary": "Ate Taco Bell, puked at 3AM in my bed, was too lazy to clean it up and woke up covered in puke from rolling around in it."}
{"id": "t3_rvjq2", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Help me lose those last few pounds!", "post": "Obviously swim suit season is fast approaching, and I'd like to be in my best shape this summer. Here are the facts:\n*I'm 21, female, and pretty much any extra weight I carry in my stomach.\n\n*I'm not overweight by any means. I'm about 5'5\" and fluctuate between 120 and 125 pounds.\n\n*My body is...disproportionate, which will tie in with the first two bullets. I have very long legs, and a pretty short torso, which means pretty much ANY extra weight is visible in my stomach (since, as mentioned, I carry weight in my stomach).\n\nHere's where r/loseit comes in. What do I do to lose those stubborn pounds in my stomach? I'm very active, I play soccer and ultimate frisbee all the time, so it's not a big deal to exercise, and I eat fairly well, though I will splurge here and there. Are there specific stomach-targeting exercises or diets that have worked for other people? I feel like I've been carrying around these same 5 pounds for half a decade now.", "summary": "I carry weight in my stomach, and only need to lose about 5 pounds. What exercises/regimens have people used that have worked to get those last few pounds off, specifically from the stomach region?"}
{"id": "t3_13erm4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend all but purposely makes me aware that he watches porn. I don't know how to broach this without sounding cray. (22f/23m)", "post": "Let me first say, as a female, I very much enjoy porn. I watch it often. I do not expect my boyfriend not to watch porn when I am not around. It's normal. I am 22 and he is 23. We have lived together for 2 years.\n\nHOW FUCKING EVER,\n\nEvery time I open my god damn laptop, there's porn.  I unflip the iPad, there's porn. I feel like every time I use a piece of technology for the day, he has already used it, beat off on it, and left the porn open for me to see.  I have come home to my laptop covered in astroglide. I open to pages of forums where he has sorted through 8 pages just to find titties when he is \"using the iPad for homework\" and can't be bothered to converse with me.\n\nI don't know why I am hurt, but I am. I am a very reasonable girl and I have expressed my concern; I don't want to see the girls you beat off to. However, every chance he is presented with to make it subtley known, he takes it. Most delete their history, this son of a bitch rubs it in my face time and time again.\n\nIs this passive aggressive? I don't see how he could be so forgetful when I have expressed my discomfort.  Wat do? How could I confront him? Do I try to shrug it off? I don't like to make a big deal out of something so stupid, but gah.", "summary": "my boyfriend leaves the porn he watches open and I have expressed the fact that I don't want to see the hussies he faps to, but it never seems to stick."}
{"id": "t3_35g6xb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20F] Boyfriend [20M] Said He Doesn't Love Me", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for 1 month and 1 week, on a date this Friday we were going for a walk and I told him that I love him. He seemed caught off guard by it and he didn't say he loves me back, which was upsetting but I didn't want to make him feel bad for not loving me back so I tried to just change the topic and continue on with our day. Now today we've been texting about it and I asked if he feels like he loves me, and he said he doesn't know yet and that he's confused, we haven't been dating very long and stuff. I felt offended by that since he was basically saying that our relationship isn't special to him in a way, and that he doesn't feel like it's serious or anything. Do you think I said it too early in our relationship? Or am I right about him not being committed by not saying it back? Keep in mind we were sort of \"dating\" for a couple weeks before the 1 month and 1 week even, that's just when we became official.", "summary": "My boyfriend said he doesn't love me back after I told him I love him, now I worry he's not serious about our relationship"}
{"id": "t3_4lg48k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 26M with my girlfriend 25F of 4 months, wants me to go to her grandmother's funeral but i haven't met her family", "post": "So my girlfriend has anxiety and is very emotional. I tend to solve problems more logically etc. Anyways, she asked if I'd go to her grandmother's funeral depending on when it was. Her grandma is currently in hospice so the time is coming soon. I've never been to a funeral before and I've never met my girlfriend's family.\n\nThe twist is that she doesn't have a good relationship with her dad and refuses to talk to him. This creates tension with her mom and her sister who live with her dad. I don't really think it's appropriate to be meeting her family at a funeral and I don't know her grandma at all. I told my girlfriend I'd take off work or whatever possible to be there for her after she gets home from the funeral (we don't live together). However, she started crying saying she really needs me there and needs someone to hold her hand. \n\nWhile I understand the logic behind this, it's also a big deal for me because 1. Her dad and her are in a feud and I really don't want to be a part of any sort of family drama at a funeral. 2. Meeting her mom and her sister or any family at her mom's funeral is going to be weird to me. Everyone's going to be crying and I don't know any of them yet, so the first time I meet them all it's going to be really sad. 3. I've never been to a funeral before and the closest thing is being in the room while putting my favorite childhood dog down with my family.\n\nGirlfriend got really upset when I told her these reasons and said she expects to have a boyfriend who is there to support her. I understand her perspective which is why I offered to be there for her after she gets back. But she really wants to hold hands during the funeral itself.\n\nDon't know what to do! I told her I'd think about it more, but she is still upset that she might have to 'ask someone else to go with her'.", "summary": "Girlfriend wants me to go with her to her grandmother's funeral but I havent met any of her family. She says she *needs* someone there with her even after I offered to give her support when she gets home."}
{"id": "t3_2j8jfq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by graping a guy in the head", "post": "So I live in Chicago, and I fucking hate taxis. Like a lot. I swear to god those little yellow bastards are the source of all evil. The Holocaust? Taxis. Ebola? It was the taxis. My fourth grade teacher who told me my nose was big? Fucking taxis. \n\nI live in a 24th floor condo in Lincoln Park, and on one fine summer afternoon, I had a bowl of grapes, a balcony, and an opportunity. My burgers on the grill, I reclined in a lounge chair on the balcony and began my assault. I tossed my first grape at the first taxi, and missed. Of course, but hey, it's the thought that counts. \n\nA couple of grapes later, I tossed a juicy purple ball of death down, aiming for the sickening yellow roof of my sworn enemy, when along came a convertible. Nice car, I thought as the grape soared down to its target. Then the wind gusted. I lost sight of my weapon as it traveled to its final destination. I finally found it just before I saw the driver of the lovely white convertible swerve, clutching his bald head. I'm now holed up in my office after I heard sirens and saw a cop car pull over next to my accidental victim.", "summary": "Threw a grape off a 24th floor balcony and hit a dude right in the head, and got the cops called on me."}
{"id": "t3_1r7xvi", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "My friend's sister [WI] is being scammed by an Internet lady claiming to live in Oregon. Is there anything we can do?", "post": "It's a long story and it doesn't really matter but essentially my friend's sister (lives in WI) met someone on Match.com and has sent somewhere in the neighborhood of $30k to this Internet woman who claims to live in Oregon.\n\nBased on [this Travel.state.gov report] (not to mention *common sense*) it is beyond a doubt that this person is a scammer.\n\nFor anyone who finds this thread in the future, a [quick search] of Reddit turned up the following similar old threads: [1] [2] [3] [4](\n\nThe scammer *IS* a real person, a white female with a foreign accent who claims to be Italian-American, has talked to my friend's sister on Skype, and based on some basic sleuthing has a phone number that seems to be a land line in Oregon. She claims to run an antique business that does appear to have a website, but there is zero actual information on it so it pretty clearly looks like a shell.\n\nSo far here are the best tips I've seen:\n\n* Reverse image search this lady's Match.com photos\n* Investigate the land line and antique business (not sure how)\n\nI would *happily* post this scammer's personal information on 4chan or wherever if I really knew how that worked but I understand the \"not your personal army\" business.\n\nIt has gotten so bad that my friend and other members of the family are saying that this sister needs to give them financial power of attorney so that she doesn't keep sending all her SSI checks to this sketchy woman. It's a good step but if the sister doesn't go along with it it'll never happen.\n\nI've seen advice on here before that ultimately going after the scammer isn't going to lead anywhere, and the problem needs to be fixed at home. I'm just asking to make sure.", "summary": "My friend's sister is obviously being scammed. What do we do? Is there any precedent for bringing legal proceedings (or anything else) against someone like this?"}
{"id": "t3_3z42i4", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[NY] Am I required by state Labor Law to take a meal break after 6 hrs of work?", "post": "Or can I elect to work through my so-called \"legally mandated\" 30 minute unpaid meal break without penal rescourse againt my employer?\n\nI write full-time for a New York newspaper owned by an out-of-state conglomerate. I am paid hourly. My workplace is not unionized (except, for some reason, the mail room).\n \nThe explanation I have been given, which seems similar to one given to r/BrainStewYumYum in a [post] from Pennsylvania, is that a previous audit exposed the company to fines and repayment for not properly allowing meal breaks.\n\nI rarely have time for an uninterrupted meal break, given the unpredictability of calls and schedule limitations of officials and often informal, chaotic schedule. I eat of course, but frequently in small poritons on the fly over even an eight hour period, often nothing more than a midday snack after breakfast at home on a sixer.\n\nEssentially I clock 3 hrs weekly of untaken break. At a paltry $13.50/hr, that's a significant yearly loss of roughly $2,000. I have been threatened with three verbal warnings for the violation, a fourth will elevate discipline to a written warning.\n\nAm I at the mercy of the company's self-proclaimed workplace statutes on this one, or am I permited under Labor Law to be paid for the time worked?", "summary": "I don't have time for uninterrupted meal breaks due to my occupational requirements, am I legally obligated to take them, or would doing so expose my employer to penalty?"}
{"id": "t3_fc70g", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "The dreaded semester abroad", "post": "So I've known this girl since middle school, and I've been hopelessly in love with her ever since. I mean I don't know if it's love, because what is love, blah blah blah and so forth. But anyways, we were off and on in high school, we went to different colleges and we've both been with a bunch of other people, but we always come back to each other. She's told me a bunch of times that she loves me too, and that she doesn't want anybody else, but at the same time it's never really been exclusive and I don't think it would last too long if we tried to make it exclusive. Neither of us has ever lasted long in a committed relationship.\n\nShe's going to Australia next week for a semester, I'm not gonna talk to her much for a few months and she's probably gonna meet a bunch of guys who surf and play guitar on the beach and wrestle crocodiles for fun. I'm a little bit beside myself, but at the same time I want her to go and have fun and get the most out of it.\n\nI wonder if anyone's ever had a similar situation? I'd like to give her something she could take with her that would make her think of me once in a while, whenever she takes it out and looks at it. Something really sweet that'll make her go \"aaawwww!\"  I know it's kind of an obscure request seeing as how nobody knows either of us, but it doesn't have to be something personal. And any ideas might help me think of something. I know this is something I should come up with on my own, but romance was never my thing and I don't have much time left. \n\nAnd honestly it doesn't have to be a gift, it could just be something we do before she leaves, but the gift idea seemed good to me. Like I said I'm really bad at this. Please help me!!!", "summary": "Girl who means everything to me is going away for a really long time, what's one last way I can show her I care?"}
{"id": "t3_3uzpad", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by shooting a friend 2 Times in the head by accident", "post": "So, this happend not today, but on the weekend. We went out to play football (if you're American, you'll call it soccer) on a field nearby. The game was quite even, noone scored. So we decided to take penalty shots to determine the winner. I went for the shot, kicked it hard and hit my friend straight in the face. His nose startet bleeding and he went deep into rage, while I was feeling sorry and the rest laughed thier ass of. Anyways, later that day, we played counterstrike together. He went out mid, I was playing awp, he walked into my shot, boom teamkill headshot. His rage in Teamspeak went over 9000 while our team (same guys from the football game) died laughing. My friend however got so pissed he ragequitted the game and we lost. This way I lost a good friend and my CSGO rank.", "summary": "Played soccer, delivered the ball with highspeed to his face, played CS afterwards, shot him in the head with an awp. Lost CSGO match, rank and good friend."}
{"id": "t3_p4hni", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, tell me about your douchebag friend stories. I'll start", "post": "So I just kind of need to vent, and I can't imagine that I'm the only one with douchebag friends.\n\nSo heres my story about... Let's call him R.\n\nR. is a constant show-off. He's had sex with 3 girls. 1 borderline chick who faked pregnancy every month, 1 ugly chick, who was another friends ex he kept bragging about, and his (now) ex-girlfriend.\n\nSo his girlfriend recently broke up with him, because generally, he's a douchebag, smokes weed all day, and lies alot. I can't believe they've been together for over a year, because she's actually a really nice girl.\n\nThe week after they broke up, he tells me he got a girls phone number. 'Lookie me, I'm hot stuff, I got a girls phone number! She was totally into me!'. I tell him grats, good for you, and carry on. 2 days later, he tells me he got 4 other phone numbers from extroardinally hot girls.\n\nHe tells me the story of how he got the number for each girl individually. By the third girl it's getting old, but eh, I'm his friend, so I'll sit and listen. He then proceeds to tell this same story to ALL our other friends, making everybody hear the story like 3 times.\n\nR. is not a very good looking guy. He dresses poor, he IS poor, actually, and doesn't pay attention to hygiene a whole lot. Yet he constantly keeps bragging about getting girls phone numbers, and then asks me what the last time was I had sex. (I came out of a long relationship,", "summary": "Don't stick your dick in crazy. And I just don't want to be with a girl at this point in my life)."}
{"id": "t3_26yrpe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [M 20] ex [21 F] is a close part of my friend group. Makes no contact near impossible and moving on more difficult.", "post": "So I recently went through a somewhat messy breakup with my girlfriend of 6 months where she kinda cheated on me or at least I felt cheated on. Before being my girlfriend, she was my best friend for a year and close friend for many years before that. \n\nNow my high school friend group is a really close group of friends that she is a part of that has stayed close even throughout college. We all still see each other and hangout often. \n\nSo after the breakup I prescribed to the No contact thing. We both agreed to cut off all texting and social media contact which has been really helping me for the past three weeks. The only problem is that if I still want to see my friends as often as i'd like, I do have to see her in group settings and the last two times it happened it has sent me into an anxious wreck because I see her texting or snapchatting the guy that she cheated on me with. I get that she's free to do what she wants but I just feel so betrayed and horrible everytime I see it. \n\nI don't know what t do reddit. I can't just never see my friends and become a shut in. These people are my closest friends in the world for a long time but I need help dealing with the minimal contact very week or every other week I need to have with her for a night of hanging out.\n\n Also I should point that the group is usually more than 5 or 6 people and I'm not trying to be friendly with her. I'm civil with her for the sake of it not being awkward but I don't by any means want to be close friends with her. I like the idea of no contact.", "summary": "Exgirlfriend of 6 months cheated on me. Went no contact completely except we have same group of friends so I have to see her sometimes or pretty much lose my friend group."}
{"id": "t3_2aq871", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by farting at the wrong time", "post": "This actualy happened yesterday night but anywho. Me and my SO had a friend coming over but we decided to have a quickie before our friend arrive. So etc things happen and then my SO gets a call from our friend saying that he was close to me and my SO's apartment. The thing is that right before the call happened I was at my climax and so when my SO answered the phone i was left there for barely 30secs but felt like hours. After the phone call is done we finish what we started but as I came to release a squeaky long fart follows. \n\nI couldn't believe that this happened to me, I have read stories about this happening on alot of sites like 9gag and here on Reddit. I was dying of embarassement.\n\nWe just laughed it off and now here I am laughing by myself writing this for you Redditors to enjoy!", "summary": "Friend was coming over, me and SO went for a quickie, close to climaxing, got a call, continued our quickie and let a squeaky fart while releasing."}
{"id": "t3_3dxygm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend [17 F] likes me romantically but I [17 M] am just not attracted to her at all. How can I let her down but stay friends?", "post": "I've had a suspicion for a while that she liked me and it was confirmed a few days ago when her friends told me that she did. She has a bit of a history of mental problems like anxiety and depression, and I don't want her to fall back into that because of me (It happened before with another guy.)\n\nI'm just not attracted to her so I'm not going to start a relationship with her but I want to let her down easy and in a way that we can still be friends. I'm pretty inexperienced with this so I have no idea how to go about that.", "summary": "Female friend likes me, I'm not attracted to her. Don't want to start anything, want to let her down easy and remain friends."}
{"id": "t3_2njv0k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A new girl [16 F] just started at my work. I [17 M] tried messaging her but she won't answer", "post": "This girl started at my work last week, she is a pretty girl and we seemed to hit it off. I added her on Facebook and sent her a message. It's been a couple of days now and she's been online a few times but I haven't gotten a reply. She might have seen the message but forgot to reply but it says she hasn't opened it yet. I don't work the same shifts as her and we don't go to school together otherwise I'd ask her number and I don't know how else to get a hold of her. Should I send her another message?  What should I say? Or does it seem like I should just forget about it? Thanks for your help", "summary": "I've got a crush on this girl that started working with me but she won't answer me on Facebook and I don't know what to do"}
{"id": "t3_2wivr3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I( f/25) hooked up with my boss (m/53). Now how do I act?", "post": "I hooked up with my boss. He is the CEO of the company I work for. I knew he was married but didn't find out until later he had like 8 kids. Ack!\n\nI have no intentions to be a home wrecker, so that's done with. However, he was the one who invited me to his hotel room and since we were both attracted to each other, we pretty much hooked up then and there. \n\nNow that we hooked up, he calls me every so randomly to meet up with me some more. Professionally he is hard to me in front of everyone. Then he would take me aside and ask me out for drinks. \n\nAnyway we haven't hooked up since that night because I never gave him the chance. How should I put it to him lightly that I don't want to hook up anymore? Deep down I'm still sexually attracted to him, but I don't want him to know because he will keep pushing it.", "summary": "hooked up with boss, only to find out later he has 8 kids. Now I want to quit but he keeps calling me and I want to go back to a professional relationship without jeopardizing my job."}
{"id": "t3_u2meq", "subreddit": "books", "title": "I've fallen back in love...", "post": "This is just a personal achievement for me, but I have just read my first book in months.\n\nEver since my uncle passed away (he was like a father to me) I haven't been able to pick up a book and read. This is an issue as I had what my family rightfully explained as \"book cravings\".\n\nI would actually get antsy if I hadn't read for a day or so, which meant that being employed full-time I found myself reading smaller novels, mostly aimed at teens (yes this includes all those vampire fictions, it was interesting to see whether the storylines differed. I'm female which made it seem less weird I guess!), just to satisfy my mind. \n\nThe week after my uncle's funeral I engrossed myself in as many books as I could, as the previous week was spent helping my mum, grandma and sisters plan his funeral\n\nThe last novel I read was about a week after he passed away, was \"Cleo\" by Helen Brown. I am a great cat lover but it was more than a story about a cat and the antics it gets up to. It's about healing. And it was also the first book that almost brought me to tears. But since then I just couldn't read.\n\nI still borrowed books but they stayed in my bag until they were due back.\n\nAnyway, today I walked into a bookstore on a whim, and picked up \"After Cleo: Came Jonah\" as I loved \"Cleo\", and hadn't realised she had released a second book.\n\nIt was beautiful. It didn't make me want to cry, and the feel of the novel was different, but it worked so well. I actually now physically feel lighter after reading it (I started it about 5:30pm, it's now 9:50pm! Not a bad time!) and it's funny how I didn't realise I had this dark weight above me.\n\nJust feels good to get back in touch with the book-craving me again :)", "summary": "I read my first novel in months after not going for much more than a day of reading for as long as I can remember. Feels good, and a weight has been lifted off my shoulders."}
{"id": "t3_381l5j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She [F24] went silent. I [M27] have no explanation why.", "post": "1. Tinder meetup. \n1. A couple of casual dates. Enjoy each other's company + conversation. Interest is still there in both directions.\n1. Nice restaurant dinner date. Perfect evening + flowing conversation. Interest increasing in both directions.\n1. Home cooked dinner date (at mine) + movie + sex. Having a very nice time with this woman.\n1. Friday evening restaurant dinner date. More easy + deep conversation. Go to a bar for a few wines. Walk her home, hang out for 15 minutes, listen to some music etc. She was visibly tired from a long dayshift so we end the evening. Kiss on the lips good night.\n1. That was over the course of 3 or 4 weeks. I've had complete silence ever since (10 days). She has not blocked me anywhere, just complete lack of response. I kept contact to a minimum once I realised something was not right (we went from daily SMS in the week preceding to nothing). Two days ago I tried calling, no answer so I left a final SMS and plan on leaving the ball in her court.  \n\nWhat reasons could she have for going completely silent?    \n\nPossibly relevant points: Came out of a 5 year relationship approx 1 year ago. Is very intelligent. I did not detect any signals that her interest was waning.", "summary": "Tinder hookup. Great dates over the course of a month. Final date: wined + dined + happy days, kissed goodnight. Stone cold silence ever since. Why?"}
{"id": "t3_3qj8lr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I believe Me [21 F] and my Boyfriend [23 M] of almost two years are about to breakup.", "post": "Everything is perfect between us, me and Paul. But I am realizing that our personality differences are creating a gap that I cannot see myself able to get over for the rest of my life. All it really comes down to(in EXTREMELY simplified terms) is that I am passionate and sociable, and he is quiet and secluded. I consistently feel that I have to tame myself in order to keep him happy, and I know that in the long run, this is only going to damage both of us. We've had many conversations about how we shouldn't try to change the other person, but I am worried that if I don't leave, I /will/ change and I am not okay with the person I would need to become. \n\nSo  I think it's time to end things, soon....the issue is we live together. Our lease isn't up until February. How am I supposed to do this? How am I supposed to explain that, yes, even though everything is perfect, I can't do it anymore?", "summary": "We live together, everything is perfect, but  I feel like I need to sacrifice my core to make it work. How do I end things or SHOULD I even end things?"}
{"id": "t3_3frxj1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [20F] going to a funeral for the first time, for my [69F] grandmother's [75F] best friend. I don't quite know what to do.", "post": "Hi all. Sorry in advance for formatting, I'm on mobile right now. \n\nVery recently my grandmother's best friend died. She was like a sister to her, and I was also very close with her since I was young. The way she died was absolutely horrific, and my grandmother held her in her arms as she passed.\n\nThis Friday an open casket funeral is being held, and my grandma asked me if I would like to go. I told her I would. I have been asked to be at funerals twice before in my life, though I've refused, for (very) distant family.\n\nMy problem is that I don't deal with death/the dead well. I am not religious but spiritual. Seeing any type of dead body makes me extremely anxious and uncomfortable. I don't believe that any part of a person or 'soul'  stays in a body after they die, only that the body is a remaining vessel, not really the person themselves... If that makes sense. My grandma and most of my family understand and respect my beliefs but at the same time, it has always been custom for them to at least view, if not touch/kiss the forehead of their loved ones one last time. I don't think I can touch her body, let alone see it. I can't really describe what it's like, but I just get such a bad feeling from bodies, and I have never seen someone I've loved in a casket before.\n\nBasically, I'd just like some help on how to act appropriately at the funeral, while also avoiding (as much as I can) making myself uncomfortable. In addition, it would also be cool if I could get some tips on etiquette in general, what is appropriate to wear, things like that.", "summary": "very close family friend died, I have never been to a funeral and have a difficult time dealing with death in any form. What can I do to support family while also not making myself uncomfortable?"}
{"id": "t3_54iqt6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "me [29m] with my downstairs neighbour [30sf] and her pot smoking habit", "post": "I purchased a condo about a year and a half ago and have been having an ongoing problem with the lady who lives downstairs. She smokes pot A LOT. She has told me she has a prescription for it; though we do live in an area where smoking pot is illegal. Her living room is immediately below my bathroom/bedroom. The building is old and has poor insulation which therefore means every time she smokes it fills my bathroom (and bedroom) with the smell of pot. When I first moved in I enquires with all the owners at a meeting (very small building and it's not professional managed) and each one claimed they don't smoke pot. I knew someone was lying as it cannot be smelled while outside, only inside my unit. One day I approached my neighbours door for something unrelated and was hit with the smell of pot as soon as I approached. She's since confirmed that she smokes pot but refuses to stop or smoke it outside. \n\nBeside the fact that I've never done pot and find the smell disgusting, I'm intending to apply for my city's police department. They have a very strict policy regarding drugs (for example, cutting out family members who do drugs, asking someone who rents to move, etc). I am very concerned that by ignoring this problem and smelling pot all the time I will be affecting my chances of being hired. \n\nI do not want to involve police if possible. It's a small building and this would cause a lot of animosity. \n\nI am looking for advice on how to escalate this and hopefully come to a resolution. I have already brought it up but she will claim she's not smoking and has no idea why I'm smelling pot. I'm not sure what my next steps should be (formal complaint, written complaint, etc)\n\nAny advice in how to approach this and (hopefully) maintain an amicable relationship would be appreciated!", "summary": "pot smoking neighbour smells up my condo - she will deny she's smoking currently and refuses to stop. Claims she has a prescription. I want to be a cop and want to deal with this peacefully if possible"}
{"id": "t3_3yxvmh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not locking my phone", "post": "It's the last day of the year. My family is quite big and most people live apart from each other. So for this year they decided to meet up at my grandmother's house: it's 21 people in a not so big house. I should mention most of them are also extremely right-wing, which made it hard for me to tell them I'm gay, so I kept postponing it.\n\nI should mention that my phone keeps dimming the lights when I read, so I put the screen to dim at 10 minutes but to lock at 15. It's usually not a problem since I always lock it manually when I put it down.\n\nWell, today I was sexting with my boyfriend on the bathroom. After a while I was super horny, so I threw my phone on the sink and went to take a quick shower. Once I finished it, I went to the room I was sharing with my cousin to put on some clothes.\n\nWell, as you may have guessed, my phone was untouched long enough to dim the lights, but not enough to lock itself. My cousin took my phone and saw a bunch of dirty texts between me and my boyfriend.\n\nAnd he told on me. He told on me hard.\n\nThey didn't say much to me, just a bunch of judgemental looks. I'm spending the night alone since it's too expensive to transfer my flight.", "summary": "Was gonna spend new year's with my entire conservative family, they found out I'm gay, gonna spend the night by myself"}
{"id": "t3_3hdugw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to let go of a feeling that is just starting?", "post": "Me (23 woman) dated a guy (29) a month ago. We didn't like each other at first sight, and I really can't remember the reason why we went out to the movies on the first place, but what I know is that after that day everything changed. \n\nI am really sceptic when it comes to love, cause I promised myself I would never feel again the unbearable pain of love rejection. He tried to hold my hand that day, I didn't let him (didn't feel right), the second time I saw him he tried to kiss me (didn't let him again).. that day wasn't even a date, we just saw each other casually on the street. So after that he stopped texting me.. I'm guessing he didn't like that conservative part about me... but come one.. it was only two times.. when a guy really likes you he makes an effort to see you again and earn your trust, your kisses.. \n\nSo I realized the thing women never want to : \" he just wasn't that into me\".. and it was okay I was really good when it came to protect my heart.. but what I didn't know was this time I wouldn't be able to do so. I kept seeing him randomly and occasionally (cause I forgot to mention an important fact of the story: WE WORK TOGETHER). \n\nWhen we see each other at work it gets random at first, but at the end he keeps flirting with me.. it is so CONFUSING! Never been in this situation before, don't know how to react... And you guys don't need to tell me what I already now.. **HE DOES NOT WANT ANYTHING SERIOUS AND HE IS NOT THAT INTO ME**... so... why does he keep doing that? why does he keep trying to kiss me when none is looking? why does he touches my hands on purpose just to hold them for a short amount of time?", "summary": "what can I do? I don't want to ask him cause since there's NOTHING going on with us, I will look like a crazy person. Is it possible that he likes me?"}
{"id": "t3_1uufkb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20m) need help. I acted extremely selfish and I hurt my girlfriend(20f) with my insecurity about our relationship.", "post": "We have been long distance after almost a year of being together. Once we began long distance the relationship became ten times harder and I began to question myself if I could do this. \n\nThis led to many many fights and every single one hurt my girlfriend more and more until last night when I poured my heart and realized so many things about myself, I realized how selfish I was to her. But it was too late, she said that she was just too hurt and couldn't be with me anymore. \n\nThis broke my heart because the only person to blame is myself. I told her I'd wait and I'd have to prove to her that I am going to do this. I don't want to go out on weekends, I don't want to and meet women all I want to do is get on Skype lay in bed and read to her until she falls asleep. Why the fuck couldn't I have just done that before without pushing her away so far away. I was just so insecure about our relationship while she was just so sure about her feelings and about herself. I felt like she was falling from a cliff and I couldn't grab and pull her back.\n\nI want to make her feel loved, every single day and every single second I'm not around. I'm not here to ask how to get her back. I'm here to ask how can I better myself and finally become a man. I want to become a man to make her feel safe at all times, to never be afraid of me and she always has someone to go to. She said I was supposed to be her person and as much as it breaks both our hearts, I wasn't. I want to be her person and her man. Not her boyfriend anymore.\n\nHow can I better myself for the good of our relationship?", "summary": "I pushed my girlfriend so far away and now I need to man up to get her back. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1eryuy", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Cat getting hot spots.", "post": "Hey all. I'm calling all cat nutrition experts. \n\nMy 7 year old orange shorthair developed a hot spot on her neck. Before I knew what a hot spot even was there was a running joke about how she would not know when to stop rubbing her head on stuff because she'd sometimes rub herself into a little scab. \n\nAs far as I can remember she always would over do rubbing her head like that. It wasn't until recently she started rubbing that spot on her neck like that. \n\nWe went to the vet to get her checked out. When I saw what she had done to herself I freaked the hell out. they sent us home with an ointment.\n\nI didn't know that certain foods could cause a cat to start getting really itchy spots on them like that.\n\nWe have two cats. The 7 year old and a 13 year old. The 13 year old had never had any problems like this. I suspect that it has something to do with the 7 year old being a little undersized, maybe a runt. (she was also pretty undernourished when I found her 6 or so years ago trying to cross a busy street. Perhaps not the brightest.)\n\nWe feed both of our girls friskies prime fillets. mostly turkey or beef. They don't like fish too much. We used to feed them fancy feast but seemingly out of no where both of them decided they didn't want to eat it any more. We have meow mix hairball control dry food out for them. I feel like we've always fed them meow mix. \n\nOh! Another thing. The two girls fight a bunch. It's never anything too out of control. They just both seem to love the same square of living room. When it gets too rough they usually cut it out or i'll intervene with a spray bottle of water. The older cat doesn't have her front claws but the younger one does. As a result the older one will nuzzle the younger cat to get her to cut it out. Could that be the reason? If so why the spots on the her ears. I've never seen the older cat go after those spots when they are playing. Again, the older cat hasn't had any issues like this. \n\nAnyway,", "summary": "does any one have any information on either of these foods causing a reaction like this? Could it be the two cats playing too rough?"}
{"id": "t3_32o3ac", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25/M] dealing with a group of friends ranging 19-24", "post": "Hello there, r/Relationships,\n\nI've got kind of a serious question that has been more or less wrecking my life in the last few weeks. I guess I'll start out with a quick back story. Started a study abroad program in January in Tokyo and have met some of the most wonderful people during the first 3 months of the program. We got along just fine and became fast friends. Fast forward to a few weeks ago, half the group has left while the remaining half is still here.\n\nHere's the problem. While I had an interest in one or two girls in the group [ages 23-24] that had remained, it seems that their interests are on the other guys. Now, I never really voiced my interests for the sake of maintaining the status quo of the group, but I knew things were going on. I wanted to give them their space, but because of it, I've grown resentful.\n\nAs a result, I feel that they've become more exclusive to themselves and as such, I've told one of the people that I felt really close to my troubles. He says that no, it's not that they're trying to exclude me and that it's all in my head. There shouldn't be any problems between me and the group, but yet I still have that weird feeling that I shouldn't be treading in this territory. They do things on their own and yet, I feel that I'm more or less put on the wayside.", "summary": "Frustrated that I couldn't get my feelings out and now feel weird trying to get back into the group. How would I go about mending these bonds?"}
{"id": "t3_2g2i0f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with a girl I've been dating [20 F] a 3 weeks, is telling me she has broken up with her old BF. But it appears she is lying.", "post": "I am currently in college and I met this wonderful girl. We have gone on a few dates and everything appeared to be going great. She wanted to taking things quite slow because she was getting over a recent ex boyfriend.\n\nHowever when I met her roommate she brought up that this girl has a boyfriend who has been acting rather shady towards her. He goes to another college and he has been spending the night \"on the couch\" at this other girls place frequently. He also has recently been posting on her wall and now I'm rather confused.\n\nI know something is up but I really don't know how to handle this. I would really like to be straight forward with her but she seems dodgy whenever I do. I really am beginning to over think things and I almost feel like I was just there to shove in his face.\n\nI really hate this situation because I feel like I could have a legitimate relationship with this girl.", "summary": "I'm dating someone who says she's getting over a break up now it appears she is still with her said to be exbf. How should I proceed?"}
{"id": "t3_11967u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend waits too long in between our sexual encounters. (both 30)", "post": "Together 2 years. \n\nWe have sex like, once every 2 weeks. Tops. We used to do it more often. I try to initiate and it goes nowhere so I drop the subject. When he initiates though, he gets super butt hurt when I am not interested.\n\nIt's been 3 weeks at this point. For the past two weeks I've been trying to seduce him. It wasn't working, so I stopped all sexual things and just gave him non-sexual physical attention and taking care of my orgasms on my own. \n\nYesterday he wants to get busy. At that point, I'm not even interested. After being turned down for weeks I become indifferent. Then, we have sex and it starts all over again. I get excited, try to initiate, get turned down, and as soon as I'm \"over it\" he wants to go again. I've tried just NOT initiating at all (maybe the chase turns him on) and that doesn't work either. \n\nWhat the fuck can I do here? Yes I have talked to him about it only to hear \"I'm sorry, I'll work on it\"", "summary": "Boyfriend wants to have sex once every 2-3 weeks. I stop wanting it after a couple weeks of trying. When we do have sex it reignites my passion, but the cycle of getting turned down starts all over."}
{"id": "t3_3hakm2", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by letting my dog into the front yard", "post": "Happened 2 hours ago. Moving out tomorrow morning so I emptied my water bed water of 10 years into the back yard. Didn't want the dogs messing with that nasty water so I let them out front. Baily, the adventurous one, decided to chase a skunk. Now I'm moving to a new place tomorrow and new people are moving into my place tomorrow and I'm trying to make my house and dog not smell like skunk. Best part is I had already moved most of my stuff out so I had to run to wall greens and buy soap baking soda and hydrogen peroxide because I guess its the magic concoction.", "summary": "15 years in my house with dogs and the night before I move out and new people move in my dog gets skunked."}
{"id": "t3_3i490r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my husband [26M] 6 years, found out he had been sexting with an old co-worker of his before we got engaged, need advice", "post": "Hi, I've never done anything like this before...like at all. So I'm not even sure if I'm doing this right, didn't realize there would be a list of rules to read!But I've heard from friends that these things can be helpful, so I'm giving it a try.\n\nLong story short, my husband of 1 month now, have been together 6 years. We have been through many ups and downs, and have been very open with each other and have really grown in our relationship. Which is a big reason why we got married.\n\nA few days ago I found naked pictures of a girl he used to work with on his phone. They were from 2 years ago, and the date suggested about 3 months before he proposed to me.\n\nFirst I know it was stupid of me to even be looking on his phone, though I wasn't looking for him cheating. Just something that is irrelevant to this problem now. But feel free to speak openly about this to me as well.\n\nSecond, I have confronted him and he has told me in phases about what happened. Though my concern is that he's not being fully honest with me or him self, because he's answered a lot of my questions with something like \"I'm not sure, it was a long time ago\" or \"To the best of my knowledge, this is what happened.\" He said it was a time in our relationship when he wasn't sure where we were going, and we weren't really having a lot sex. But honestly, he never clued me in on that time in our relationship much, especially since he proposed only months later. He said he knew it was wrong immediately and feels so guilty. But he kept those pictures, and I know he never stopped his friendship with her. \n\nNow we're only a month into our marriage, and I'm worried about how we're going to deal with this...how I'm going to deal with this!", "summary": "I just need help deciding if working through this is the right thing, and if so, need good advice on how. If not, need advice on how to end it."}
{"id": "t3_r77re", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is the weirdest thing you have seen on the subway?", "post": "I got the idea from another thread in here where someone claimed that the NYC subway wasn't that bad. One day, I was headed into the city to go see one of my favorite punk bands at the time. In order to get to the venue, we had to take a train downtown. While some of my friends and I were sitting on a train, I hear a woman scream and a group of people immediately walk towards the other side of the train with looks of disgust. Now, I focus my head to see what could be so bad, and it's a homeless guy. Someone else on the train is helping him on and yelling \"this is a human being, i was like this man once, etc.\" I couldn't figure out why these people would react this way towards a homeless person. Out of nowhere my friend yells \"fuck this\" and runs off the train. That is when the smell of puss and infection hits me like a cockslap from Zeus. The man's foot was swollen to the size of a basketball and discolored if not rotting. Now, besides the smell and the sight, what really does it is the fact that something in his foot has popped and he is leaving a heavy trail of some brownish blood all over the train.", "summary": "Went to the city. Got on train. Man had one foot the size of a basketball that stunk of infection and bled on everything."}
{"id": "t3_2spcom", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] have no idea how to read the situation with guys I like, or even ones I want to be friends with", "post": "I just became a university student a couple months ago, and due to distance, my long term boyfriend of 2 years and I broke up. I'm pretty introverted, so he was my only friend, and he held a grudge. So here I am, introverted and alone in a STEM school which is guy-dominant, and I don't know how to interact with them. I really think it would be good for me to get out there again, but I've never been good at making friends, let alone the whole dating scene.\n\nI joined a few clubs at the beginning of last semester, and met a group of three guy friends[all 20/M] who live together, and do everything together. I feel comfortable enough around them now, but still get nervous even asking them to hang out, because I get paranoid that I'm a nuisance. I want to become closer friends with all of them, but don't know how to go about doing that.\n\nIn particular, one of them I can't help being drawn to. He's extremely passionate, and talented, and just amazing to talk to, and he and I are a lot alike. He's not the kind of guy I usually go for, and I'm not sure what it is about him that makes him stick in my mind so much, but I can't help thinking about him. \n\nMy problem is that he also got out of a long term relationship recently, I don't know how to get him alone without scaring him off, and I'm pretty sure he just sees me as one of the guys. One minute he'll be really honest, and be having a pretty deep conversation with me, and the next, he's laughing it up about some joke he made at my expense. \n\nAny advice at all would make me very happy.", "summary": "I'm completely stupid and shy when it comes to getting closer to people both romantically and non-romantically and need help, please"}
{"id": "t3_17zij4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex-girlfriend [21] broke up with me a few weeks ago, yet still wants to hangout with me [22] every day.", "post": "Hey all, I just recently was on the receiving end of my first breakup. After about five months I was told the reasoning was chemistry and her not being over her old boyfriend. The breakup wasn't dramatic, and she moved out shortly thereafter; however, she still keeps in contact with me via text in the mornings / nights, and I see her at least once or twice a day. She knows full well how I feel about her, and how I am still in love with her, but I can't tell if she's flipped the switch and \"friendzoned\" me that quickly or not.\n\nI'm all for giving her space to do her own thing, and figure out her own issues... however, I can't help but feel a sting whenever we part without so much as a hug. Being the schlep that I am, I would still do anything for her and keep her as company for as long as possible (unless she started to date somebody else).\n\nI guess I would just like to know if it's possible to rekindle the romance, or if she is just looking for the chase again.", "summary": "Girlfriend breaks up with me, then keeps in contact every day. She knows I am in love with her, and its beginning to tear me apart that we aren't labeled as a couple. Should I be worried about the label?"}
{"id": "t3_1zxq1h", "subreddit": "self", "title": "My brother thinks entitled to a car", "post": "He's been asking for a car from my parents, punching and making holes on the walls for years. Problem is, we can't afford one right now. We're struggling to pay bills. If he wanted a car, he should work for it. In the past month, my mom took a house keeping job just to keep up with day-to-day living. Instead, she poured all that money to get a car. The car was a non-op, used car (it ran, it just didn't have smog clearance yet, so we can't get it registered and insured yet). It's been a week sitting in our garage. Today, he just raised voice on mom telling her to shut her mouth because she's not letting him use the used car. My mom's reasoning was it's uninsured and failed smog test but he kept arguing that he won't get caught or get in trouble. Again, my mom can't afford to fix it yet. She just bought the car a week ago! He said he's been walking for miles and riding the bus just to get to school but not really. He gets dropped to school M-F everyday, and picked up from his friends house after school (3-4 of the 5 days). He doesn't realize my mom looking up for him and all he does is raise his voice and argue his false points. He thinks he's entitled to a car because he's 17.\n\nHe thinks it's bad. I'm 21, have a job, and still does not own a car. I go to a community college and wake up at 4AM, ride 2-3 buses just to get to school. Going back home is another 2-3 buses. All the money that I earn, I pay the house bills.", "summary": "Brother wants car because he's tired of taking a bus twice a week and because he's almost 18. A spoiled kid."}
{"id": "t3_nljuw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit: What Queued Your Worst \"Late to the Party\" Feeling?", "post": "I'm a twenty-four year old white male and this past Summer met my father for the first time as an adult; from him, I learned my father was addicted to methamphetamines during the period he impregnated my mother, probably until he left our lives. She herself was addicted to crack during the whole 9month period and evidently was until I was around seventeen. We've oft been isolated by people who got to know my mother; family members, people who she gets to be friends with, neighbors, and were shunned due to this and I never really understood why.\nShe's never had close friends, relationships, rarely had let me out of the house, would get mad if I tried speaking with her, barely ate and thus had barely food in the house. I was made to follow this path.\nShe is such a sweet person, I never knew anything was off with all of this and even though I have been out of the house since nineteen, it took two years to start seeing how exactly all of that was bad and the adverse effects it had on my person. \nI recall a time making fun of crack babies in high school; looks like the jokes on me, hurr hurr.\nAlso, since this revelation I have been much more tolerant of people who have been intentionally indoctrinated considering my unintentional indoctrination. It's hard to know more than what you know sometimes.", "summary": "Learned I'm a crack/meth baby with crazy mother, didn't realise anything was wrong with her/the raising."}
{"id": "t3_139gqi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Men and Women of the military (past and present), what are some of the most ridiculous methods used, that you have seen or heard, to get out of the military?", "post": "In recruit training, SanDiego, 2 males in my platoon were found giving/receiving oral to each other intentionally during our shower time.  Whether the two were legitimately homosexual or not is out of the question because there was no discreetness about the act whatsoever.  We had 3 shower rooms and they had left a couple minutes before everyone else to take their shower.  Fastforward a couple of minutes and there out in the open are the two guys giving each other fellatio for everyone to see.  Here is the best part about it all...instead of kicking the 2 out of the Marine Corps like they wanted...The drill instructor told them that they were both getting a 1 way ticket into the navy where they could perform these kind of acts where it is deemed normal.....(this is what was said, not in any way a hit to the navy).\n\nSo Reddit, do you have any similar stories that you have heard of or personally saw?", "summary": "2 recruits in recruit training purposely get caught blowing each other in hopes to leave the Marine Corps and get sent to the Navy instead."}
{"id": "t3_2k211w", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by eating spicy chips", "post": "This happened about twenty minutes ago. Let me start off by saying that I am a male in high school and enjoy self pleasure. So I am watching Doctor Who and the urge comes to me. I was eating takis at the time. For those of you who don't know, takis are a really delicious tortilla chip with a LOT of chile and lime seasoning. So I go at it not realizing what was on my hand for about 30 seconds. Pain kicked in and I had no idea what to do so I took my water bottle (luckily right next to me) and apply water onto my boys. Pain gradually subsided however still stings a bit.", "summary": "Ate spicy chips. Got horny. Got burned bad down south. Watered down the situation. Today I fucked up."}
{"id": "t3_2gqtoo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] and boyfriend [24M] are having problems with our sex life.", "post": "Our sexlife has been normal for the first 5-6 months. We had sex like every day and it was good. \nBut since I got that birth control shot I don't feel like having sex that often. And I felt really bad and tired the last few weeks.\nSo I understand it seems like I'm making excuses but that's not what happens. \nSo anyways. The last time we had sex is 4 days ago. And he says we only had \"good sex\" twice since 2 weeks.\nI really am sorry for it but there's just no feeling of having sex sometimes. He keeps asking me why I couldn't just let him try to make me horny but it's not about the being horny part it's about that I don't even want to be horny.\nWe had two fights about it since yesterday cause he thinks I'm controlling our sex life which is kind of true but what's so bad about doing what I feel like and telling him if I don't want something. \nHe was yelling at me and I kept saying that I'm sorry but apparently he didn't hear it.\nHe said he wouldn't even want it anymore and just left the house.\nI was planning on having sex with him, just like yesterday, but not like this, it just makes me want to leave.\nHelp.", "summary": "I don't want sex as often as I used to two weeks ago and my boyfriend gets really angry about it. We keep fighting. Help."}
{"id": "t3_fpg1w", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I have a totally irrational fear... How do I pull myself out?", "post": "I have this fear of being murdered, in my own home, but it goes well beyond that. It all started when my car was broken into, in my own drive way. My laptop, radar detector, GPS, system, amp & sub were all taken from my car in the middle of the night. I really felt stupid for leaving my things in my car, in plain view. Following the incident, I would go outside on the back porch to smoke and almost immediately have a panic attack. I'm usually up until 4 - 5AM, so it was quite dark when I'd go out. One of my dogs would usually go out with me and she would bark at shadows. That's what triggered it. Even with every landscape light & the lights from my porch on, I'd panic at the thought of what I couldn't see beyond the lit areas. I'd race inside, usually throwing my cigarette to the ground while flailing my arms about & slam the door. From that point on, I'd have to constantly make sure the doors were locked. Every light in my house had to be on. I'd make sure my dogs are awake & alert. I'd usually wake the next morning in the recliner in my bedroom, sometimes with a knife (which I now sleep with close by). \n\n*NOW*, I have quit smoking. I thought that would help and it did for a few days. Unfortunately, I still freak out, every single night. I cannot be home at night without every light in my house on, in a complete panic. It's even gotten to the point that I grab all four of my dogs & stay at a friends house quite frequently. Should I seek therapy for something like this? Any home remedies for curing this kind of fear?", "summary": "I have a fear of being murdered in my own home, at night. It's gotten to the point that I avoid my home quite often. What can I do to get over this?"}
{"id": "t3_4rcskw", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "From a 678 to a 615 in six weeks?", "post": "I recently shopped around and went to a dealership to see what kind of financing I could get for a vehicle on their lot that I really liked and thought I could get a good deal out of. I requested a $10,000 loan.\n\nThe way my credit was at the time, I had 100% on time payments with a 12 month credit history of payments, I also had a new line from Best Buy credit that has been going two months now. Prior to this loan request, I had a 678 score. \n\nShortly after talking with the dealer and running my credit, I decide that I'm not financially set enough to be buying a car. To add insult to injury, I find out over the next couple weeks that they contacted 18 various banks and credit unions for financing...all denying my loan. I would read each letter stating the reasons for denial and seeing my score drop... 658...647...630...625...and now finally 615 where I'm at the end of the inquiries. During this time, I managed to miss ONE payment from Best Buy which resulted in a single interest charge and double payment that I caught up on the next month. I am current on the payment of that now. \n\nI also applied for a credit card and I believe I was approved (since it was through my current bank) and I should be receiving one next week.", "summary": "I have 18 hard inquiries from a car loan and one late payment. Is this normal to drop a credit score over 60 points?"}
{"id": "t3_24tor8", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[16/f] deciding whether to stay at home unhappily or risk living with boyfriend (19/m) which might not be the best financially/might cause parents emotional pain", "post": "Me and boyfriend (Lets call him R) have been together almost 2 years and I am seriously planning on moving in with him when I turn 18. \nBUT, I was raised in a Christian home and dont want my Christian mom to feel like a failure with me moving in (and of course breaking the marital sex rule) being not very Christian-like. It hurt my mom when both my older sisters moved out at 18, but they were different situations. They both disliked my mom because of spoiled and entitled personalities even though my mom did everything they could to give them a good life. So my mom feels like a failure with both kids hating them when they moved out and one of them heavily getting into drugs right before she moved out. I have a theory that she views me and my younger brother by two years as the good, successful kids, since we were from her current husband and not her asshole ex-husband. And we didn't get pregnant at 18 or get into drugs.\nI have no hard feelings towards both of my parents, I just want to become independent and live with R. Thats where I'd feel happiest and if this didn't go through then I'd feel resent towards my parents for holding me back. \nFor backstory, R wants to be a psychologist and is getting his Associates degree in accounting so while going to school for psychology will earn good money as an accountant. He's mature, logical and understandable. I don't think there's any risk in that area. He's a freshman in community college now, hes not a bum.\nHis mom I've talked to this about and she made a goo point saying \"If you keep trying to make them happy instead of *myself* happy then I'll never be truly happy.\n*I also haven't told my parents about my plans and they think I'm staying at home through college.\nBut this is a huge decision and I want as many opinions as possible. I've asked teachers, my two cleaned up older siblings and R's mom. But you can never have too many second opinions on a serious and life changing decision.", "summary": "Choosing between moving out with responsible boyfriend but risk mother feeling like a failure with teaching me morals *or* staying at home, financially safe, but unhappy and resentful towards parents."}
{"id": "t3_hris5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my mother stole money from me to ruin my family. What do I do?", "post": "Repost because the last one got caught in the spam filter.\n\nSo, in February of 2010 when I was 16-17, I was the victim of a screwup at the pharmacy, which landed me in the hospital for about 4 days. I received a decent amount of money for a settlement for the screwup, and it was placed in a bank account with my mom's name on it, to be transfered to me when I turned 18. Starting in January, before my 18th birthday in March, my mother started behaving very nastily towards my father, and eventually filed a restraining order, saying he had become \"violent,\" and \"kicked in her door.\" I never saw any of this. He never raised a hand towards her, even though they argued frequently. He had been sleeping in the garage in the winter to avoid upsetting her, and was asking to sleep in the house. Turns out, she withdrew almost $5000 from my settlement money, to be used for college, to put a down payment on a divorce lawyer the next Monday. Now she's saying to the court that it was a \"loan,\" even though I wasn't even aware of it until months later. I think I'm going to press charges, but I figured I'd ask what everyone else thinks. Theres a lot more to the story I'm probably missing, so if you have any questions, feel free to ask.", "summary": "My mother was entrusted with my settlement money, and used it to hire a lawyer to start an unnecessarily harsh divorce against my dad."}
{"id": "t3_zzrg4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20f] was rejected for saying \"I love you\" and am feeling a little low. How can I look at my situation in a more positive light?", "post": "I [20f] have been with my boyfriend [21m] for six months. He's incredible, it's the best relationship I've ever had, and I love him. But, he doesn't feel the same way, and admits to being afraid to think that way because he's graduating at the end of the year and most likely will be leaving me.\n\nI've had guys say they love me and then take it back, so I appreciate his honesty. Unfortunately, the logical part of my head doesn't control my tear ducts.\n\nAdmittedly, I really had my hopes up that he'd be saying \"I love you\" soon. I was looking for something to differentiate me from the other girls he knows. My boyfriend has a lot of female friends, and he's extremely affectionate with all of them. He practically dates them all  - takes them on one-on-one outings and stays up all night with them when  they're going through a rough time. He's a good friend, and I love that about him.\n\nBut on the other hand, I feel like the only thing that sets me apart from his friends is that he fucks me. And that doesn't feel so great.\n\nSo how can I look at this differently?", "summary": "I told my boyfriend I love him and he rejected me. Now I don't feel like I'm special to him."}
{"id": "t3_4ne9lx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Unsure if new relationship will work out, need advice", "post": "(I'm 15M she's 14F) So I started dating this girl 3 weeks ago, and I'm unsure if we are compatible. She doesn't seem to trust me by what she says, and we're really different from each other I feel. She's said things like \"I see us lasting a long time\" and stuff like that but yeah. We don't really fight but I feel she's just kind of all over the place as a person. We had an off and on \"thing\" 2 months before we got together. \n\nShe seems pretty happy with us but I'm unsure if I am. She keeps saying things like how she really loves me, and how she think I'm \"the one\" and stuff like that. She's also a little clingy, texts me a little too much. Sometimes her actions and what she says are little too much,(talks too much) gives me this \"woah calm down\" feeling inside. We had sex. (Yes I know I'm too young don't have to tell me) But this is only because she really really wanted to. I've done it with someone else already but she was a virgin. I'm a little worried that this will complicate things, even though we talked about it and how it wouldn't stop us from breaking up if something went wrong.\n\nNow the other part...I realized I still have feelings for another girl that I liked before I dated this girl, and she likes me as well but she's also in a relationship, her relationship is going to end soon though. I think I like her more than my girlfriend...idk how bad that is but yeah. I just really don't know what to do and would love some advice.\n\nAidan", "summary": "started dating girl, dont think we work well together, she seems to be getting attached, i like another girl more, help plz <3"}
{"id": "t3_2ngbsm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] with my GF [28 F] 2 years, she says I'm too paranoid, but I don't think it's totally fair.", "post": "My GF flew off at me the other week.\n\nI asked her if she was texting another guy and me asking this question almost made her breakup with me.\n\nThe reason I thought she might be is that she has suspicious phone activity. She uses it a lot when I'm not in the same room and quickly stops what she's doing when I come in, she recently started putting it on total silent when she comes home and she leaves her phone screen side down. This has only been happening past couple of months. Put this with the fact she has never acknowledged my existence in a public sense in anyway in 2 years and I felt a bit sus.\n\nWhen I asked her if something fishy is going on she exploded and said I don't trust her etc etc went to stay at a friends house, and pretty much implied we were breaking up.\n\nNow I feel if I have a problem with something or if I am a bit suspicious I cannot ask about it or she will instantly dump me.\n\nIs it fair? I feel like I should be able to talk about what's bothering me. Am I too insecure with asking about her phone habits?", "summary": "I questioned GFs phone habits... She went apeshit... now I feel I can't talk to her about stuff like that."}
{"id": "t3_3up9tx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend (M24) keeps calling me (F19) his life partner. 2 year relationship, I don't feel the same way.", "post": "So basically my boyfriend and I have been dating for two years and he keeps calling me his life partner. He believes we will be married someday and would totally be okay with being engaged and living together right now. \n\nI, on the other hand, don't really plan on him being my \"forever\" due to multiple reasons (money, he's very critical, insecure) so it makes me very uncomfortable when he says this. However, it would start a huge endless argument if I ever brought this up to him so it's better to leave it alone. \n\nMy problem though is that I don't want to waste his time when I don't plan on this lasting forever, but I also don't want to break up right now because we have a great relationship and it's a nice thing for the time being. \n\nAnother wrench to throw in is that he has absolutely no friends besides me. This puts a lot of pressure on me to constantly be there for him and be his only source of happiness, entertainment, and companionship. This sometimes makes me feel trapped in our relationship which is a feeling I really don't like. I don't like that feeling since I'm only 19 and have been in this relationship and one before this meaning I have always been in a relationship ever since I was 16. Sometimes I get curious about being single but I feel like I can't even consider leaving him when I'm his only source of friendship. \n\nI'm not suggesting I want to end our relationship. But I don't like the feeling that I basically couldn't if I wanted to. Anyone else had a similar situation or general advice for how to continue in a relationship where each partner has different expectations or if it should continue at all? \n__________________________________________", "summary": "Boyfriend plans on marrying me, I don't feel the same. Been in relationships since I was 16. Current boyfriend has no friends besides me, I feel trapped like I couldn't leave if I wanted to."}
{"id": "t3_35msz8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girl [21 F] that I [23 M] have been casually seeing for a while slept with another guy, and I have no clue what my next move should be", "post": "A bit of backstory: I've been with this girl for around 5 months. It started out as a purely physical thing where we'd just hook up on a regular basis then go our separate ways, but both of us wanted to keep it exclusive. Lately we've been spending more time together and it's been getting a bit more serious, but nothing drastic. I do enjoy spending time with her though if we're being totally honest.\n\nJump forward to last night, we're at the bar with all our friends, and this guy she used to have a bit of a fling with is there. She's drunk, giving him a little too much attention, and I can see that he's trying to get laid. So, being the aggressively jealous person that I am, I freak out & yell, we get into a big argument, I say something hateful to the guy, and I storm out in a jealous rage.\n\nThis morning, she tells me that she ended up getting blackout drunk and they hooked up. Something about how she practically had to be carried home, and she woke up naked with the guy. She seems remorseful though, and judging from the story she gave me, it sounds like he really took advantage of her drunkenness. But I don't know what actually happened, and I probably never will. Which really makes me think I should've knocked that son of a bitch out when I had a chance, but that's life I guess.\n\nIt still makes my blood boil when I think of it though, and due to the fact that our relationship isn't all that serious, I don't know if I should cut ties, or try to put it behind us, because to be honest, the sex is amazing, and I don't think this is going to happen again. But on the other hand, our one rule was that we keep it exclusive, and she broke it. I kind of have a tendency to torture myself with this type of thing as well, so my willingness to \"work it out\" might just be my inner masochist talking. Feedback would be great because I'm feeling pretty torn.", "summary": "Girl I've been casually seeing for a while got way too drunk and hooked up with an old flame, but seems remorseful about it. Don't know if I should break it off or try to put it behind us."}
{"id": "t3_3ksswu", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My friend (20M) have a problem with a girl (20F)", "post": "I'm currently trying to help him move on from her.\n\nLong story short, my friend met a girl in uni. They talked a bit before but only on FB (talked a bit in class also but that's about it). They went on to being in different classes due to one of them failing a year. She told him on FB that she'll hang out with him. After a while she met her current BF. Now my friend says that it's not fair that she gave her BF a chance before him even though she hasn't met either one of them. They argued about it a bit. She blocked him and unblock him after a while to help him move on.\n\nNow it has been more than a year, and he still tries to message her in whatever way possible, to the point of harassment. She would open up accounts under her name, open up other accounts, post pictures of himself and tag her in it, etc. She has contacted the police twice, and the police has talked to him twice, warning him but he doesn't care. He has specifically said he doesn't care about going to jail, as long as she will explain why she didn't give him a chance. The police also warned that he'll be kicked out of school, but he doesn't care.\n\nI've been trying to talk to him but his mind is locked onto this, and he said it'll basically continue until she gives him a reply to why, which she has multiple times, but he thinks she's not being truthful. I'm not sure how to help him move on, as he clearly cant and I don't want him to get kicked out of school/going to jail because of a girl..", "summary": "Friend met a girl, can't get over her not wanting to hang out with him. Harasses her for more than a year, police threatening doesn't scare him. How would I help him move on?"}
{"id": "t3_1pnh0y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my gf [17 F] of eight months broke up the other day because of her dad found out we had sex", "post": "Alright, well this Sunday, the 27, I picked my girlfriend up to take to my house. Halfway there she receives and call from her mom and I have tot take her home. I didn't know what it was about, so I drop her off and take her home. I get back to my house and her father texted me that based on some information he had received, he didn't want me to see his daughter anymore. I'm here think, \"Well f***.\" \n\nI call my gf later to see what happened. It turns out that her parents snooped around her room and read the messages off of her iPod (which receive her texts as well as her phone). We were talking about how we had sex and yada-yada. So her parents yelled at her and then her dad texted me that. \n\nYesterday we officially broke-up because I argued with her father about the whole scenario (I know, stupid me) because I couldn't handle how he didn't see me right for his daughter just because we had sex. So she ended it because it was between me or her father. \n\nSince then we've still been talking and there's a lot of feelings going around - neither of us want our relationship to be over. How do I convince her parents that we should continue dating? I know I could get over her but I really don't want that to happen. A lot of stuff happens in eight months.. I honestly think I love her, but maybe I'm just young. \n\nSeriously though, can anyone help me with how I should handle this situation? I really want to stay with her.", "summary": "Parents found out we had sex and they made us break up. How do I stay with her or get back on their good side?"}
{"id": "t3_4ta1dy", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I Want to Move Out of State?", "post": "Hello everyone. So I am looking to move out of Pennsylvania. I've lived here my whole life. I'm 24 now. Have a job I don't like much. There's not many good jobs around here. I don't have many friends, and lack family (I have one best friend) , so nothing is keeping me here anymore. I want to get a fresh start in a new area, where the people are friendly, plenty of job opportunities, and the weather is warm. I was going to go to school for health information management. The program is going to take probably a year to finish and I don't know if I can stay at my current job for that long. However, I don't think it's wise moving out of state with only having data entry and warehouse experience. The states that I was recommended were Texas, North Carolina, and Arizona.\n\nShould I stick it out with my job until I finish school? Have you ever moved out of state because you were unhappy? Was the grass greener on the other side? Please share your experiences =)", "summary": "Have you ever moved out of state because you were unhappy? If you did, how did you go about doing it? Did it work out in your favor?"}
{"id": "t3_40dd48", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "I have social anxiety and am doing terribly in interviews. What can i do to improve this?", "post": "This has been happening to me a lot lately. I'll get an interview, and the person who has seen my resume tells me right off it looks like my experience is a great match for the position, before we even start. \n\n(I'm just applying for customer service jobs for the most part, and my resume includes a lot of that, plus some lower management in a customer service job)\n\nAnyway, I do just fine with actual customer service, for some odd reason. \n\nOutside of work, i don't really have a social life. I'm perfectly comfortable interacting with friends through text, but i rarely see any in person. When i do, i get a bit weird, but that's around people i'm friends with. \n\nJob interviews though... My mind goes blank. I try to mitigate this problem by researching what the particular company i'm working with uses for interview questions, and preparing and practicing my answers ahead of time. This doesn't work. My mind goes entirely blank, i stumble over words, it's pathetic, and every single time someone has indicated that they definitely want me to work for them based on my resume, by the end of the interview they've changed their mind. \n\nWhat can i do about this? I don't have the luxury to just keep practicing and get better, since interviews don't come around that often and i need to actually get a job fairly soon because i'm currently without an income (due to moving to a new area and taking a seasonal job which ended)", "summary": "I'm a great employee and have references to back that up, but interview so badly no one will hire me. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_ihasx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, am I being unreasonable about situation with friends staying in my house?", "post": "So here's the background.  My parents moved out of the country for business (temporary) and left me to live in the house to take care of it.  It's a big house and lonely alone, so I asked if my friends could move in with me.  My parents agreed to friends A and B, but were hesitant about also allowing friends C and D because they did not want that many people living there.  All those friends lived together before, so A and B did not want to ditch C and D.  I managed to convince my parents, and they said fine, but that they would charge everyone $300/mo as rent (which basically just covers utilities).\n\nAbout 2 months ago, friend A's brother comes over without A telling anyone.  I assumed it was just for a few days, but a few weeks later he was still there sleeping on the couch the whole time.  I asked A and he said he was only staying for the hockey games.  At this point my parents figured out he was here (my brother told them) and were upset that no one asked them if someone else could live there.  I told them the situation and they said fine.  \n\nIt is now 3 weeks after the Stanley Cup finals, and he is still here.  My parents are pissed that he is still here and with no definite plans on when he is moving out.  I talked to my friend about it, and he thinks my parents are being unreasonable.  Meanwhile, I'm placed in the middle of it all and am stressing out over the fact that I'm taking shit for this from both sides.  So reddit, am I being unreasonable about this?  Is there a better way I can explain this to him so he gets it?", "summary": "Friend's brother has been living with us (with no advanced notice) in my parent's house for 2 months with no definite date to move out.  Friend thinks my parents are unreasonable for not wanting extra people living here."}
{"id": "t3_4afzwt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] Not feeling much for my girlfriend, but living with my her [22F] girlfriend and not sure what I can do at this point.", "post": "Hello,\n\nI'm a 22 M and have been dating my 22 F girlfriend for about 11 months now. What started off smoldering has really faded out the past few months. She was originally going to go to California for Grad School and decided to stay where we live to be with me essentially. I didn't ask her to do this, I advocated for her to leave. Ultimately I supported her decision because that's what you're supposed to do. Fast forward a couple of months later we are living together and everything is great, but we've only been together a few months. Over the course of the past few months I've become increasingly annoyed by her for no apparent reason. She's extremely needy and clingy and wants words of affirmation/kisses/cuddles constantly, but I don't feel the want to kiss her very often. I have begun to see her as more of a great friend whom I love, but I'm  not sure if I am in love with her. Are there any tips for becoming less annoyed from anyone in a similar situation? She honestly does nothing wrong and I'm extremely appreciative of everything that she does for me. I'm just not entirely happy. Any advice?", "summary": "girlfriend of a couple months stayed in my state instead of moving to california for school and I live with her now and not sure what to do as I don't feel much for her anymore."}
{"id": "t3_151xdu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He [22] ended it before it started. I [20F] want to show him it could work.", "post": "Hi guys. Need help here. I am an exchange student, and teaching my native tongue to a guy who was considering going for a year abroad in my uni. We...started dating. (This was not even two months ago.) We have wonderful chemistry, he makes me laugh and really started opening up to me. \n\nTwo weeks ago, he started considering other options for his year abroad. Not leaving, for instance. Or another place. And he told me-a few days ago- that he doesn't want to feel pressured to go to my uni because of me. That he had a girlfriend last year who was also an exchange student and that he had made serious plans to follow her, but they ended it and he changed everything at the last minute. He told me \"better now than later, trust me\"; \"the less I see you, the better\". \n\nSo, basically, I'm sorry he was hurt. But I really think this could work, and that we could be happy even if only for a while -and I'm trying to work up the courage to tell him, but I need advice : is this even a good idea? Any chance this could work? How can I word it?", "summary": "scared shitless at fighting for a guy I barely know who is trying to not get hurt by avoiding a relationship with a necessary expiry date."}
{"id": "t3_4pxxza", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Paying off $24k of debt", "post": "Starting a new job on wednesday paying AUD $24.11 p/h + 9.5% super, 8 hrs a day with 30 minute lunch break 5 days a week. Its a call centre job, not cold calling.  We answer queries from customers about their utility bills etc. The contract for this job is for 6 months (probationary). I have been told that i will be offered an extension on the contract after the 6 months as long as i do my job well and not slack off. I also have family friends in company so lets just say that i will have my contract extended for the purpose of my query. Im also looking to do a networking/system administration certification in the upcoming months (which will cost around $2k, give or take). \nI have roughly $21k owing on personal loan with a 7 year repayment period and $3k owing on a credit card. I want to pay these off as quickly as i possibly can. Currently im paying rent on a place i no longer live at until August 23rd at $193 per week, roughly $85 per month for phone bill and $55 per month for something else (up until the 16th of oct). Currently only paying around $58 per month for the credit card (has been stable around this figure for quite sometime so im thinking this is just the card fee as i dont actually purchase anything with the credit card anymore) and $217 for the loan (i think this is monthly). So presuming the credit card fee stays the same, what would be better to pay off first?\nAny help with this i am really grateful for.", "summary": "Owing $21K on personal loan and $3k on credit card, what is the best way to pay these off with my upcoming salary? "}
{"id": "t3_2yetym", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to smell lube out of curiosity", "post": "It began when my uncle asked me to help redecorate the house with the new furniture he got from his friend. Being the good nephew I am, I happily obliged.\n\nNow here's where trouble begins. The furniture my uncle's friends gave to us, still had a lot of stuff in them (mostly clothes). So we had to take out the clothes and put them in garbage bags in order for us to use and carry them. Out of sheer luck, I found a bottle of lube.\n\nThe labelling on the lube said \"**strawberry flavor**\". I don't have much experience with sexual things and so I got really curious. I wanted to smell the lube. Yes you read that right. **I WANTED ITS FRUITY SMELL IN MY NOSTRILS**.\n\nLittle did I know that water-based lube actually has a very watery-like viscosity. Despite it clearly saying that, I still thought it had a lotion-like viscosity. So opened the cap and tried to squirt a bit into my hand.\n\nInstead, a grand deluge of lube came down all over my body and the furniture--the fruity smell pervasive throughout the vicinity. As this was happening, my entire family stood and watched with mixed expressions of horror and confusion. I told them to relax as it was only water-based lube but my clarification only added to their horror.\n\nThey then asked, \"Why did you open it?\" to which I replied nonchalantly, \"I just wanted to smell it.\"", "summary": "Found lube while cleaning out new furniture. Got curious and tried to smell it. Instead spilled it all over myself in front of my family."}
{"id": "t3_24iacz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A good friend [17 M] became very religious, I [18 M] don't know how to handle it", "post": "Hello /r/relationships,\nI had a few conversations over the last week with a very good friend of mine that I know for 8 years now. He's an Arab, I'm a Turk.\n\nHe always was a chill guy. We would do everything together that was funny, like literally everything. We would go out to smoke waterpipe with another friend. We would talk about anything, we would talk about girls, make fun of things that we would all find funny.\n\nHe has changed now, though. No more smoking waterpipe, no more trying to have sex before marriage, no more dating girls as it seems. He talks about why all women should wear scarfs and why they should be capped everywhere on the body. He tells me to stop consuming alcohol. He tells me to stop running after that one girl and rather go learn. He tells me to stop smoking.\n\nHe's still kind of chill and responds quiete normally when I ask him about that girl I want to date and get closer to but he also said that if he was me, he'd stop having contact.\n\nHe even sent me a video about the Islam and what you should do. I friendly said 'No' and also told him that I respect him for the way he thinks if he thinks that it's the right way but I know for a fact that I won't change and that I'll also go out to smoke with another friend later today.\n\nIt's still very strange how he has changed so quick. We would have smoked together like 1-2 months ago and now he just became like that. I don't know how to handle his behaviour. I mean, I don't really think he's going to become an extremist but he seems to be very bullheaded when it comes to religion.\n\nLike I said, I'm a Turk but I take it all easy and also consider continuing to smoke, consume alcohol and having sex before marriage because it's and would all be just part of my life.\n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Friend became very religious recently. He has changed, will never go out to smoke with me again. He tells me to do things that are right in his opinion. He sent me a video of what direction to live is the best."}
{"id": "t3_2a60rj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18F] girlfriend is starting college and I [19M] over think everything about her safety when I deploy at the end of the year.", "post": "So I'm in the Army National Guard and was gone fall semester of my freshman year for training. \nI took classes in spring and now in the summer. I haven't really done the whole college experience and I'm not into that stuff. \nMy girlfriend (of 3 years) recently started drinking and partying a lot with just her friends. \nI really despise alcohol due to a long history of alcohol abuse in my family. But If she wants to have a drink with her friends I don't really mind. \n\nShe just had her orientation for college and is telling me know she is planning to attend a lot of frat parties and house parties.\nI wouldn't be apposed to going with her to a party because she will do it regardless and I'd feel safer being able to be there. \nThe catch is my unit deploys at the end of the year for 10 months. \nMy greatest concern with her starting college is that she will drink and something will happen to her or she will do something she'll regret. \nAm I just extremely paranoid. Or am I alright in my concerns. Again I don't know how the college life is I just hear stories from frat guys I work with about the number of drunk girls they have slept with at these parties. \nI love this girl to death and trust her. But she is very inexperienced with alcohol and I fear the worst. Please advise.", "summary": "my girlfriend starts college and plans to drink and party. I'll be gone for 10 months in December. I worry for her and our relationship."}
{"id": "t3_zap55", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help! I feel like that crazy girlfriend and know something needs to change.", "post": "I am 21F and my boyfriend is 22M. We've been dating for about 9 months now but have been friends for 4+ years. I'm his first girlfriend. \n\nIn my eyes, our relationship is like a wonderful dream. I've been in a long term relationship before (2 years) and it ended fairly amicable, but I know how shitty dating can be. We have so much in common, share wonderful memories and crack up together. We are in love. I'm cynical when it comes to relationships because I've experienced failure after failure, not to mention my parents are divorced. \n\nWe argue, a lot. Over almost anything. Usually, its my fault, but he's admitted we both can be childish at points. Our fights are passionate, usually quick, and we move on within the day. This taints the better part of our relationship, but not enough for either of us to want to end it. Although, we did break up about 5 months ago for maybe a week. (It was a drunken break up)\n\nIf I were to describe our relationship from his point of view, you all would probably think I was a psycho. I'm clingy and have a temper. I can be too sensitive and crave attention. Honestly, I hate it, and he knows I hate it. Change isn't easy to come by, and there are some emotional/depression/self esteem issues I should work out on my own.\n\nI guess my question is, how can I change my attitude to be a better girlfriend? Or should we break up for a while so I don't feel so attached to him? I see so much potential in our future together and love him dearly. I just want to make the right choices.", "summary": "I feel like that crazy girlfriend and want to be better so I can have a healthier relationship. Should we break up to save our potentially awesome relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_4in5ps", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30F] can't get over my ex [29M], and it's making me physically sick", "post": "I feel silly even writing this - I dated my ex nearly two years ago for a while before I moved away. We kept in contact, sexted and met up again last year. It didn't turn into anything more as we were both living in different places, and I was dealing with taking care of my sick mother. He entered into a relationship with someone else following that, which ended in January. Since then, he has again has been in contact with me, texting often, asking if I had moved back in town, and wanting to meet up again when I'm coming to town in a few weeks. We've been really friendly with each other. The thing is, I know he is hooking up with other girls right now, and it makes me really sad. \n\nI don't want to meet up with him and get hurt, but the thought of never seeing him again is really hard. I can't seem to shake him and I don't know why. I guess we never really fell out of contact so its been hard for me to get over it. I don't why I keep hanging on. He seems able to enjoy time with other girls obviously, but I can't date - just the thought of being with someone else makes me really sad. I try to move on but my heart isn't in it. When I find out through mutual friends of him hooking up with someone, I go to a really low place. I beat myself up, I tell myself I'm not good enough/pretty enough/whatever enough to him, I really hurt myself. \n\nSince last year, I've lost about 10 lbs just from going through depression and anxiety. I've gotten a really great new job, and things start to look up for me, then I focus back on him and I'm really sad again. I don't want to obsess over him, but I do. I feel I've come off so pathetic still talking to him and carrying this on - I've thought of meeting up with him again but just really don't want to get hurt. Feel like I come off so foolish. Why can't I shake these feelings? How can I stop feeling so unreasonabl hurt over him?", "summary": "I dated a guy two years ago that I'm still hung up on; I can't move on and I make myself sad and sick over it - I want to let this go. How can I?"}
{"id": "t3_paexl", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I need some relationship advice :(", "post": "i am having a confusing relationship with my ex-boyfriend. We had a neutral break-up, and agreed to stay as friends. The cause of the break-up was that, he felt that he was tied-down, and wanted more freedom as we are both just in our teens. I've tried to change his mind, but he was persistent. So right now, we are just suppose to be friends, and I'm okay with that. But now that we are not in a relationship, he treats me really well, and sometimes when we are alone, he will kiss me and hug me. He still shows that he really cares for me and likes me a lot still, but in front of his friends, he is a bit cold to me. I'm really confused, what should I do? Does he still like me more than a friend?", "summary": "My ex-boyfriend treats me like I'm still his girlfriend but doesn't want to stay in a relationship with me or any other girl for that matter."}
{"id": "t3_27agax", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it worth starting a relationship with a good friend [22, M] if I [22, F] know ahead of time our end goals are different?", "post": "I met my friend in college a little over a year ago. The first night we hung out, we stayed up talking almost all night. We started hanging out more regularly (never anything sexual though), and then we graduated. I haven't seen him in person since then because we live far away. \n\nHowever, we text and Skype frequently. Skype conversations are never shorter than 2 hours and often last up to 4. Basically, we really understand each other and like each other's company. Seeing each other in the future is not completely out of the question... currently we live very far away but he wants to move closer to where I live for a number of reasons. And we'll be going on vacation together in a couple months. \n\nBoth of us are recently single and craving both physical and emotional connection. But here's the thing: he is very, very opposed to having children in the future. I, on the other hand, want kids. It's completely irrelevant right now, but I'm wondering if it's even worth pursuing if I know our end goals are so different. I don't want to have to persuade him to change his mind about such a serious life decision.", "summary": "The guy I'm into doesn't want kids in the future and I do. Should I pursue a relationship or not?"}
{"id": "t3_2raaoi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 F] with my boyfriend [21 M] of 2 years. We live together and he has made a huge decision he just expects me to be OK with.", "post": "SO my boyfriend and I have been living together, for 6 months now. We both work in the food industry and hes planning on going back to school in 2 weeks. \n\nA little background on our jobs, its important to our disagreement. I am a salary manager in a very popular corporation and he is an hourly manager in another popular franchise. We both make enough money to make ends meet. With my salary I can pay for m half of the bills. He is an hourly manger but is working overtime, so he can make his ends meet as well. \n\nWell, he just put in his 2 weeks notice at his job today because his boss accused him of stealing from him and threaten him of \"breaking his fucking hand\" if he ever stole from him again. My boyfriend on the spot told him he is leaving in 2 weeks. \n\nNow I wouldnt mind so much if we were in a better economic state. I have about 2500 in debt right now and I am now worried about whats going to happen to our apartment. If we cant pay for it, its really going to affect us on our future like our credit score. Also our electricity bills and internet is under our names so that will affect us too. \n\nNow we just got over a heated discussion because he said I wasn't supporting him on his decision. He said, right away I told him he was wrong for leaving the job. That I didnt believe in him cause he kept saying \"things are going to be ok.  I can find another job, its not a big deal\".  \nWe also got in an argument about him thinking his team is going to follow him into whatever new job he has. I told him, in a restaurant youre by yourself, theres no such thing as a team. \n\nMy question is, am I making a mistake by freaking out about whats going to happen? Did I react too harshly to the news?", "summary": "boyfriend quit his job without another job lined up. We can make ends meet with his job right now but Im still freaking out about the future. Am I wrong for freaking out?"}
{"id": "t3_3af93w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (f35) stay interested in my partner (m42) while he's away for extended periods of time?", "post": "My partner and I have been together for over a year, living together for 2 months. He is a professor so he gets summers off to go work on his service and research. I love him dearly, and I am very much into him when we are together.\n\nHowever, when he is gone longer than a week (and this summer he's been gone 3 weeks so far), I just kind of lose interest. Not in a way that I want to see other people, I just lose any kind of bond we have. This may be in part because we are terrible at keeping up with each other when we are apart.\n\nI visited him for a few days about 1.5 weeks ago, and it was perfect. It takes a day or two to reestablish our connection, but it was wonderful. He's going to be gone a month longer with no visit. I don't know how to keep it up without being totally estranged when he returns. \n\nI'm not angry with him, I don't want to break up. I just feel... apathetic? Like he's just a distant person who resides in my home. I don't know how to explain it other than apathy. I don't want to feel this way about him.", "summary": "When my partner and I apart, we are terrible at keeping up with each other, so I end up feeling apathetic toward him and I would like to know how to maintain the love I feel for him when he is away."}
{"id": "t3_tax1c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the most badass thing your mother or father has ever done?", "post": "My father used to live in Chicago. He owned a furniture store. There was a large business across the street, and the business didn't have very good parking. So, this one employee would always park in my father's parking lot.\n\nMy father asked him everyday for a week to please stop parking there, because it took parking spots away from his customers.\n\nOn the first 4 days the guy says \"yah, sure. I won't park here.\"\n\nOn the 5th day, the guy says, \"Fuck off! This is a free country!\"\n\nSo, my dad waits for the guy to park in his lot again the following Monday.\n\nThe guy parks in my father's parking lot, flips him off, and then storms to the business across the street.\n\nSo, my father being the natural badass he was, sprays water all over the car. Keep in mind this is in CHICAGO. In the FUCKING WINTER.\n\nWhen the guy comes out from work a few hours later, he finds my dad standing there with a hose, smoking a cigarette, with the douchebag's car almost completely frozen.\n\nThe guy flips his shit and tells my dad he's calling the cops, and my father just says nonchalantly \"It's a free country, isn't it?\".\n\nThe douchebag's car was frozen in my father's parking lot for the rest of the winter. It was actually in the news, but I can't seem to find it on the internet, considering it happened in like the 60's.\n\nNeedless to say, the following spring, the guy didn't park his car in my father's parking lot.", "summary": "Guy parks his car in my father's parking lot and refuses to stop doing it, so my father turns the car into an icecube."}
{"id": "t3_3wkjlz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M 21] dont know how to convey to a girl that I like her and want more than a friendship.", "post": "Basically my issue is that I'm terrible at telling someone I'm interested in them in ways more than a friend. I'm not sure what it is or why it happens per say, but I just cannot break that barrier. I'm great at forming long lasting friendships but they form due to my interest in the girl as more than friends. \n\nAs stupid as it sounds, I quite literally get \"stuck\" in the \"friendzone\" as a result of my own inability to act on my feelings and tell the other party I am interested in more ways than just friendship. \n\nLately I've been wondering if this is just something I personally deal with or if its common. Any help/advice/tips/changes I can make to myself/my perception would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "suck at telling someone I love them, probably cause too afraid/dont want to ruin the friendship. need help fixing this."}
{"id": "t3_3azvpj", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I don't feel like my wife [32/f] can be emotionally intimate with me [32/m]. Can we get there? If so, how?", "post": "I'm [32/m] a pretty intimate person with my friends, strangers, and family. I tend to overshare easily, introspect often, and have no problem connecting with other people who are like me very quickly and on a deep level. \n\nUnfortunately, that doesn't include my wife [32/f]. She comes from a closed family and doesn't easily open up. This manifests itself in all aspects of her life. She's wary of sharing details with strangers, tends to talk about basic things with me, and is quite bored/ uninterested in sex. But most of all, I have been nagged for years by the feeling that we don't have a \"spark\" - an emotional connection that makes me want to do everything for her. \n\nI have got to the point where what we have feels increasingly like a friendship rather than a deep emotional relationship. I have suggested that I'm not willing to be in a relationship that's not fulfilling emotionally and have told her that I have considered a separation. \n\nOur therapist thinks that my wife needs to get better in touch with her sexuality in order to open up more, but I'm not sure. That feels like treating the symptoms rather than the root cause. I think the problem is deeper than just sex. I think she's not able to be intimate emotionally with me. \n\nI know that stereotypically, it's the guy who can't be emotionally intimate and the girl who seeks it. But I just wonder, is emotional intimacy something that one can \"learn to do\"? Or is she just likely to always have a hard time opening up? And finally, is lack of emotional intimacy grounds to divorce someone?", "summary": "Emotionally capable guy [32/m] has closed wife and relationship that lacks intimacy. Wants to know how/ if wife can open up more and if she can't, whether he's crazy for wanting a divorce."}
{"id": "t3_3pfwei", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The new guy I'm seeing [24/m] likes to sit on the same side of the table as me [20/f]. Weird or cute?", "post": "I've been seeing this guy now for about a month or so (note: we're both in our 20s), and when we go out to eat he likes to sit on the same side of the table. Personally, I think it's cute; most of the other guys that I've dated have never done this. When I asked him why he likes to sit on the same side of the table he said he feels its more romantic. However, my friends think it's weird. They say it's normal for being out in a group to sit next to your SO, but not while out to eat alone together. I don't want to be judged at restaurants, but at the same time I don't see what the big deal is. Since this has become somewhat of a debate, I thought I'd ask Reddit! What do you all think? And if you all think it is  weird, how should I explain this to my new man?", "summary": "dating someone new and not sure if this is a weird thing that they do until my friends made fun of him for it."}
{"id": "t3_1foqwk", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Don't try to tell me what I can't do.", "post": "Earlier this year, I applied for a summer job at my university. It paid decently but allowed me to take classes offline, which I preferred to do, so I went for it. At the same time, a friend of mine (we'll call him Jack) was applying for the job.\n\nJack became a dick about the job really quickly. Told me I wasn't really qualified (even though I'd been working for the department this job came through for a year) and that my customer service skills were lacking (even though he's seen my boss praise them). Needless to say, I was unhappy and pride mode went into overdrive.\n\nOriginally, my plan was to go in and just talk about what I knew and how I could be of service. But his lack of faith made me step it up a notch. I talked to people who had the job in the past. I did research on the people hiring me. I even went to one of the old hirers to get some tips. I was running at 110%.\n\nInterviews end and we find out the results. I got the job. Jack didn't. I went to go talk to him about it but was pulled aside by my friend first, who showed me tweets Jack made saying I was cocky and didn't deserve the job. His reasoning was that I said I wish I knew if I got the job sooner than the date we were expected to, because I just wanted to know so I could get on with my life and stop stressing. He took it as me thinking I got the job.\n\nKnowing about the tweets (I don't use Twitter), I decided to be the lesser man in the situation. At this time, Jack and I were roommates. I walked it and he was quiet. Obviously pissed at me. So I go next door to our friend's room and just shouted \"[FRIEND] I GOT THE JOB! I'M SO EXCITED!\" The walls of our dorm were small. I know he heard me. Walked back in and he just glared at me, but I didn't care. He was a dick.", "summary": "Friend\" tells me I can't get a certain job that he's applying for. Becomes colossal dick. I get the job. He doesn't. I yell about my success to people."}
{"id": "t3_13plx3", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Broke up over a month ago. Still bummed out sometimes. Advice?", "post": "Hey guys,\n My SO broke up with me over a month ago. The first week has been hard but I got over it. Problem is that from time to time I still think about it and it really bums me out.\n\nTonight, I randomly started thinking about the offer of having sex that she gave me 5 days ago to which I declined. I think it was a good decision for the both of us but I might have been a little harsh by saying \"it would be weird to hook up again\". In some twisted way, I might have said that to convince myself I'm over her.\n\nI don't want to get back together because of the long distance, her inability to express emotions, her controlling and her manipulation of the insatisfaction of her own truth but I still have the remainder of some feelings.", "summary": "Being horny leads to reconsider the offer she gave for sex which leads to missing her which leads to insomnia and feeling like crap."}
{"id": "t3_4zvchc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24f] BF [28M] of three months only wants to hang out 1-2x a week, which means we only have sex once a week. I need more. What do I do?", "post": "BF and I have been dating for a few months. at first we hung out all the time and had sex every day, sometimes twice a day.\nFor the past two months we've been hanging Out less and less. Probably 1-2x a week max now. Usually if we hang out a second time it's with other people so we don't have sex, meaning that we've been having sex literally once a week.\n\nI can't really handle it. I need it 3-4 days a week ideally. I've told him before that he can hit me up for sex whenever but he has never done that. We also used to have sexy convos by text all the time but now we basically never do. I finally told him some time back that I want to start doing that again and he agreed but we haven't. A few times I've tried to start something naughty over text and he didn't really go for it.\n\nI think the big problem is just not hanging out enough, but I don't think he wants a relationship where we're seeing each other every other day.", "summary": "BF and i don't have enough sex because we don't see each other all that often and don't have sexy convos via text in between. I need more sex but don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2di73u", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by peeing", "post": "Happened just now. I happily skip up the stairs, getting ready to head to bed. I brush my teeth and then feel the sudden urge to pee. I drop trou and let it go, spraying my urine all in the toilet.\n\nMidway through, as I was about to go no hands, I see a spider crawling up the toilet roll. I panic, and jolt backwards, making my urine go all over the place. Then, with my baby maker out, stir dripping my urine, I grab the nearest deadly thing to banish this monstrosity. Air freshner. \n\nI spray it as it crawls away. Then I lost it. So I pulled my trousers back up and ran. I'll clean the floor when that bastard is dead.", "summary": "peed, got attacked by spider, splashed my urine like a fat kid jumping in a paddling pool, ran."}
{"id": "t3_4c7i4j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "First relationship [19M] with my GF [19F], been going out for 3 months - what do we do now?", "post": "Ok, so first off let me just say that things are going great. We've been on dates, we hang out loads and we genuinely really really like each other (maybe even love?).\n\nUp till now, everything sorta felt like we've been climbing up this relationship ladder, but right now it seems like, short of marriage and children, we're as high up as we can be. I guess what I'm trying to ask is - what do we do now?\n\nDo we just keep on going as things are (it's definitely not stale yet btw) or what? I guess maybe I also don't know how much time I should try to spend with her coz I don't wanna come across as too needy (sounds stupid I know). Basically I'm just a bit confused about what to do with our relationship at this point. Any tips/suggestions would be greatly appreciated! :)", "summary": "Gone out with a girl for 3 months, confused about where/what/how to progress the relationship. Feel free to ask more questions about the relationship!"}
{"id": "t3_3j9r4h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18 M] girlfriend [18 F] of a year and I decided to break up for college about 5 days ago. I think I want to try long distance.", "post": "We had been dating for a year, things we're going well but she was always a very flirty person. I developed trust issues because of her being so flirty so when we went to different colleges I pushed for a breakup.\n\nShe had been 100% willing to try and make long distance work, but I just couldn't get over my doubts. After a week apart, I realized I would always regret not at least trying to make things work, so I decided I'd try to get her back. I looked up a train route to her university, found a fancy pizza place(it's her favorite), and an ice skating rink in her area.\n\nI called her up that night, spilled my heart out and asked if she'd take me back. I explained that if she said yes, I'd take her on the best date of her life, and if she said no that she should know I'd still feel way better than I had been.\n\nShe told me that first I needed to know that the previous Friday she had a drunken one night stand attempting to get over me. She said she regretted it and that it meant nothing, but it crushed me. I thought the worst she could say was no, but this was far worse.\n\nIt had literally been days after our breakup, we had been talking the entire time, we had even said that we loved each other the night before. I still love her, but I don't know if I could ever forgive her. I know it wasn't really cheating because we didn't have a title, but it was like the first opportunity she had, she left me behind.\n\nI'm extremely emotional and distraught right now and I don't know what to tell her. Any advice/comments would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Broke up with my girlfriend due to moving away for college, decided I wanted to try long distance, she told me she's already hooked up with some random guy."}
{"id": "t3_1cg1as", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A serious communication problem between me[M21] and my girlfriend[F19]. Am I being an asshole to her?Or something else?", "post": "My gf and I have been dating for more than 1.5 year and were friends for more than 3 years. I know a lot about her and she does the same about me. She's a really great person. I could spend the whole day describing how much I like her and how much I am lucky to be with her. But there's an issue in our relationship that I can't get over or keep up with. The issue is her crying during the majority of serious/heated conversations. When we strongly disagree on something and struggle to reach an agreement, I try to calm down, explain my opinion more precisely and ask more questions about the parts that I don't understand about her opinion, but instead of doing the same as I do, she starts getting frustrated, and cries. Reasonably it's the end of the talking, but for her it's not. She asks me to stay and listen to her expressing her frustration about the situation and me not agreeing with her (while she continues crying) instead of calmly discussing the actual problem.  \n\nYesterday I tried to talk her about her crying problem and how her actions are unproductive in solving anything without hurting her feelings, but I apparently couldn't. She shifted the blame on me and accused me of not caring about her and not want to spend time with her. She stormed out of the house. Now it has been 24 hours since our fight. I called her at least three times but she didn't answer my calls. She probably staying at her parents' house.", "summary": "When we are having an argument or heated disagreement, girlfriend cries a lot instead of trying to solve the actual problem. Am I unintentionally being an asshole to her? Or Is she being manipulative? Is it possible to solve this issue?"}
{"id": "t3_3ycohl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21/F] husband [23/M] is always on his phone, getting me super irritated. Advice?", "post": "(Sorry if this is rambly, I'm just super annoyed!)!My husband (24) and I [21/F] have been together 5 years. Lately, he has been really irritating me lately with his excessive phone use, and it's starting to get under my skin! He is constantly on his phone, either playing his stupid game or on Facebook or God knows what else. \n\nWe have a 1 year old son, and it's gotten to the point where he'll sit on the couch and play on his goddamn phone while my son tries to play with him. And it's ALL night. I am mainly the one playing and taking care of our son. He wasn't this bad before, he would put his phone down while our son was awake, but lately it doesn't matter.. I rarely have my phone. My son is usually throwing it around or it's on the floor. I only really use it when my son is napping or at night when my son is in bed. I DONT want to be one of those parents who's always on their phone, that's why I rarely have it on me when my son is awake. Plus, he's a handful enough already lol. Anyway, my husband is really irritating me with his phone use. And sometimes he can get a little weird with me touching it too. it always has to be in his reach. It's starting to make me wonder if maybe he's doing more than being on FB :-/ \n\nIve tried talking to him so many times about it. I've tried to talk to him about it nicely, and not so nicely. I bring up my concerns, but he usually stops for a couple hours or maybe one day, than goes right back. Tonight, I told him to please get off his phone and help with J (our son, he has a really bad cold) and he got mad, tossed his phone and just sat there and was all mad. It's getting ridiculous and I don't know what else to do.", "summary": "Husband always on phone, will barely help me with our son, wont let me touch it, unsure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_443xcb", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by telling a tinder girl she didn't have to shave", "post": "Been on tinder lately. Well i matched with a girl that looked decent and had potential. We talked for awhile over the app and then she decided to come over. She had asked me if it was ok that she hadnt shaved, now i am a mature adult so a little bit of hair is no big deal. She shows up, not quite as good as her pictures which is typical, and sounds pretty manly. We hang for a bit and then start getting into it. I reached in and felt bush but that doesnt bother me anyway so everything is good. Eventually her pants come off and now i see why she said she didnt shave. Her pubes ended around her knees and i could smell her. I tried to muster through, trying to avoid hurting her self-esteem by asking her to leave or stopping. I eventually got it up by thinking happy thoughts and covered my jimmie, went for a few minutes and then she wanted to get on top. When she did so i was forced to view the garden and went limp. I said that i had to pee before and thats maybe my problem, it wasn't, so i went into the bathroom and started getting myself hard again, fake flushed the toilet and rushed out to get back in there. Again within a few minutes i was soft again. At this point i decided to tell her that i have this problem if i have jacked off recently and told her i did an hour before to last longer, not an actual problem for me i promise, and told her that i probably wont be able to finish and eventually sent her on her way. Hopped in the shower and cleaned the smell off of me.", "summary": "Tinder chick had been rubbing Rogain on her legs since birth and bathed in fish juice. Told her i have a 'problem' with getting it up and sent her away."}
{"id": "t3_1cq11l", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "18 month old daughter consistently screams for 1-4 hours every night at bedtime. HELP!", "post": "My daughter has been screaming for 2 hours so please bare with me as I try to articulate how I feel and what is going on. \n\nI am 30 weeks pregnant and essentially a single mom ( husband is in the oil field). I really need to be able to sleep!\n\nMy daughter has always been a handful at bedtime to say the least. I have tried later bedtimes, comforting every 15, 20,  45, 60 minutes and it only fuels her tantrums more. I  currently doing the 'cry it out' method but haven't been able to stick with it for more than a few days on the past. \n\nI feel awful just leaving her cry herself to sleep ( when it works). I don't want her to have lasting issues because she thinks no one loves her. \n\nShe has always had a very consistent bedtime routine. I have always prided myself on that. Her actual sleeping habits are straight from hell, since the day she was born. \n\nHer routine:\nSupper: 530-6\nBath: 630-7\nQuiet time: books, a tv show \nTeeth, new diaper\nBed: 8-830\nScream: 8-12\n\nThe only part in her routine that has ever changed is the hour we put her to bed and it has only changed once from 730, that was 8 months ago. \n\nShe has never consistently slept through the night, she doesn't sleep past 6 ever...even if she doesn't fall asleep until midnight.", "summary": "My (18m) daughter screams for 1-4 hours every night. She has always been a nightmare at bedtime but I am 30 weeks pregnant and need my toddler to sleep more than a newborn! HELP"}
{"id": "t3_1hmn8w", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not wanting to be late for work.", "post": "I work midnights at a gas station so I'm the only one there on most nights. Meaning I cannot afford to be late or the person I'm replacing not only gets pissed off but can risk going over on hours (god forbidden the damn place pays them an extra dollar for not clocking out on time). While getting ready with about 10mins until I had to leave I had the need to shit. And I of course made the mistake of deciding to hold it until after work (hence why I'm posting here). \nLuckily this is not a \"I shit my pants\" story, I was able to make it to work and a few hours in my shift with mild discomfort but no huge problems. It was around 3am and very slow (we stop selling beer at 1am so after that its dead). I decided now was the prefect time to take my shit. About 5mins into it I heard the door ring... FUCK...\nIt was the point of no return though, they could wait a few minutes. Then I heard the dreaded \"HELLO IS ANYONE HERE?!\" I quickly finished up and came out. It was my bosses 20yr old spoiled bitchy brat. Fuck everything. She makes a hugeass deal out of it saying she was waiting for 10 minutes (which is bullshit) and that \"My mother will hear about this\". She's the kind of person that overreacts to everything and hopefully my manager will understand that... Hopefully", "summary": "Didn't take a shit before work and manager's daughter came into store while I was shitting. Made hugeass deal over waiting 5 minutes."}
{"id": "t3_1qlsyn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23M] feel disconnected from my three-year-long relationship with my [25F] gf.", "post": "I apologise in advance but this will be a long one.\n\nOver the last few months, I feel as though I'm just a passenger in my relationship with my 25 y/o gf.\n\nWe have been together for three years, but aren't living together yet - because our job situations don't lend themselves to moving in. We have discussed it and we would like to when the time is right. (I'm in an entry-level position with opportunities to move in six to twelve months time and she has just secured a management job in a retail store.)\n\nI feel disconnected from her because of how she has been when we communicate.\n\nWe came back from a two-week vacation a month ago - the holiday was great. But since we have come back it's as if she's not making much of an effort for our relationship.\n\nBeforehand we used to text each other romantic/lovey things all the time. Now if I ask her to send me a 'nice' text she puts something generic or says she doesn't know what to put because she doesn't want to repeat herself - repeating herself would be hard to do because she doesn't say things in the first place.\n\nOne example - last night I told her I really wanted to have sex with her and her reply was along the lines of lol really?\n\nOur sex life isn't great. The last time we did was on holiday - so just over a month ago. I saw her at the weekend and we had planned to do stuff but she wanted to watch films instead and then before we realised it I had to take her home.\n\nShould I be worried about this lack of intimacy, or is it a common occurrence in relationships which have been this long?", "summary": "GF isn't saying lovey/romantic things as often as she did. Sex life isn't great. Don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2k060a", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by screaming at a random lady on the phone at work", "post": "So, this happened yesterday and I didn't have time to write out until now. A little background \u2013 I work for a call center that reviews car insurance policies, mostly for the renewals; we do both inbound and outbound calling. I also have the wonderful privilege of working from home. I have 2 cats and a 10-month old German Shepherd/Lab mix puppy, the latter I usually keep with me in my home office to separate her from terrorizing the cats while I'm trying to work.\n\nThere I am, working like normal. Pup decides it's a good time to be real annoying and jump everywhere, making dumb puppy noises. Now, all of our calls are recorded and we are \"coached\" on 5 calls per week. These are just weekly reviews of 5 supposedly random calls that we are graded on by our managers. I must do well in order to keep my status of no pants, lay in bed all day work flow, or just keep my job in general (cuss words would get me fired.)\n\nAnyway, here she is going nuts and then an outbound call pops up. I introduce myself and begin explaining the reason for my call, whilst fighting off this 80lb demon dog child, and right as I'm done with my introductory spiel, I press the mute button on my headset and yell, in my angriest dad voice, \"GO LAYYYYYYY DOOOOOOWWWWWWWNNNNNN!!!!!\" She saunters off and I direct my attention back to the call, looking down to press the mute back off and noticing that in fact, the mute button had not been pressed and I just told this random lady to go lay down after asking about her car insurance. I heard an \"Uhhhhh\u2026.\" on the line and promptly hung up in my embarrassed and anxious panic after the damage was done.\n\nIf this call gets \"randomly\" selected to be reviewed this week, I could be in some deep shit.", "summary": "muted myself on call for work to yell at pup, didn't actually mute myself and yelled at innocent stranger on phone, might get in trouble for it."}
{"id": "t3_29wxkt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [19/F] find self-worth in the dull relationship I have with my partner? [25/M]", "post": "We've been together for over 2 years, but just lately things haven't been great. As soon as we get home, the TV's on, laptop's are on and we barely speak a word to each other. Without sounding harsh, I feel that I genuinely make all the effort, but he's not so interested.\n\nFor example, I'll start up a conversation, and he quite literally stares at the TV and won't respond. When I tell him I would like a response and I'm wondering if he heard me, he says he \"has nothing to say\". I don't interrogate him, I just talk about different topics I have in mind!\n\nAnd then he says we'll go out for a walk together, go to the beach etc and when the day comes to do these things, he ends up telling me he doesn't want to. \n\nI have depression, panic attacks and my dad passed away end of last year so I'm not in a position where I feel overly confident about myself. If he looks at the TV whilst I'm talking to him, I take it to heart. When he spends more time making plans with his friends than he does with me, it really hurts me. \n\nHe knows all of this, and that I've put him on a pedestal because he's all I have right now. I've put college, Uni and my passion for travelling on permanent hold because those things weren't going in the same direction as he was, and he knows this.\n\nIs he taking advantage of the fact he knows he can get away with an easy life because I'll never leave? To me, he's a genuinely sensitive and loving person, but I think he favours doing things the easy way and making life as comfortable for himself as possible. How do I resolve all of this?", "summary": "My boyfriend shows no interest towards me and is enjoying the way things are, and I'm just happy that he's happy, despite the fact I'm doing nothing with my life."}
{"id": "t3_wp1gg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit can pull some great advice out of almost anything, what can you say about my life?", "post": "I'm a seventeen year old going into grade twelve, and I don't know anything about my future... I really don't know where I'm going career-wise. That's one thing; I also have a girlfriend of 2+ years and we have yet to kiss, I haven't gotten even my learner's license yet, and throughout my life I have refused to use any drugs/alcohol to this point.\n\nNow, I've been really satisfied with all this untill today, when an old friend and I got together and met up with our third friend (who turns out to now smoke weed/is now on a two month light-every-day streak). This lead to a messed up day of following them to dealers and near fights, small town gangs and free kijiji kittens, all leading to getting some friends together to light up.\n\nI did nothing but follow and listen to them today, and what an average day for any one of them amazed me. I left and thought about my current life, and now I'm here on askreddit while laying in bed.\n\nBasically, I want to know how normal I am.", "summary": "I don't do anything in my life, and I spent a day following friends function through their weed related day to day activities. This 'normal' teenager life contradicts mine a lot. Am I still a normal person?"}
{"id": "t3_1lkwex", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20F) think I want to break up with live in boyfriend (20M) of two years.. not sure how to do it", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for over two years, and living together since we were together around 6 months. \nEverything was awesome, we rarely fought and there has rarely been any huge issues aside from a few times I've come across him text messaging other women inappropriate things, which he apologized for and I forgave him, etc. (I'm surprised i did, i have serious trust issues)\n\nNow, lately, I've been feeling very upset and frustrated, and generally unhappy.\n\nI feel as though I need to be on my own, I want to travel and explore and do all kinds of things that he's not interested in. I find myself thinking things like \"if I was single I'd go do this\" or \"if I became single again I'd go here or try this\" & I'm realising that if I ever want to do those things, it likely won't be while I'm with him.\n\nBut, here's the hard part - I have no idea if he feels the same way - he knows something is wrong because I've completely shut down over the weekend, my mind is so jumbled and I'm so confused that I didn't eat anything yesterday so I'm obviously not feeling well. Hes been too sweet to me, massaging my back before I fell asleep last night, etc, so I feel like this might completely blindside him.\n\nDon't get me wrong, there's lots about him I love, he's kind (most of the time), he can always make me laugh or smile with his goofy sense of humor, but I really don't know if I csn do this anymore. I feel held back, trapped! I know I could go do all those things with other people while still with him but I fear the rarely seeing eachother due to our schedules would just end in a breakup anyways..\n\nSo what I need is advice - How do I do it? We live together so this will be incredibly hard... I'm so scared to break his heart, I'm scared he'll get angry. I'm terrible at confrontation, so i'll likely break down and be bawling before I even get any words out...\n\nPlease help :(", "summary": "want to break up with live in boyfriend of over two years.. no idea how to do it or how the conversation should go.."}
{"id": "t3_4dke9n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [21F] has been incredibly controlling lately, what should I [19F] do?", "post": "I have been with my girlfriend for 1 year and a half, and I love her dearly. I truly believe she is my soulmate and that I will spend the rest of my life with her. However, she has been incredibly controlling lately and I don't know what to do about it. \n\nShe goes to college about 2- 2 1/2 hours away from where I go to college, so I see her when she comes home on weekends. When she's up at school, she has to know where I am, and if I'm not in my room doing homework, she's mad that I'm not talking to her. If I'm with my friends at all she gets very angry because I could instead be talking to her. And by talking to her, she means like Skype. I text and snapchat her pretty regularly when with friends. She will claim I am making her depressed and anxious, and will be very distant toward me if I don't talk to her the night prior. The most ridiculous thing she's done in regards to control is telling me she drank and drove the night before because I wasn't talking to her so she wanted to spite me. \n\nI told her if she doesn't stop I will break up with her. She told me she couldn't and within 5 minutes she called me and begged for me to come back to her house because she would do everything in her power to fix it. \n\nAccording to her, this controlling thing is because she has severe anxiety. She is so insecure and anxious, so craves my attention to reassure her. Though this may sound like bullshit, she legitimately does have really bad anxiety and gets panic attacks very frequently.  She claims once she comes home from school (she graduates in a month) that she won't feel this way anymore because then we will be in the same city. \n\nI love her to death and don't want to break up, but this situation is stressing me quite a lot. Any suggestions? Thanks in advance.", "summary": "Girlfriend is controlling me through manipulation, I don't like it but don't want to lose her. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_2l3bv2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my boyfriend [18 M] of 9 months, He loves me, I said I do too, now I don't know if I still do?", "post": "Wanna keep details brief: Both guys, been together for around 9 months now. Somewhere around 4 months in we start saying \"I love you\", and at the time I assumed I really did because I've never been in love before.\n\nThings have developed and he often says how madly in love with me he is, but I don't feel I can say the same back, heck I don't think I really do love him.\n\nDon't get me wrong, he is AMAZING and I really think he's the nicest guy around, and this relationship is awesome. I want us to still be in a relationship but I can't honestly say I love him, and he's started noticing I don't reply \"I love you too\".\n\nHow can I go back on what I said in the past AND STILL keep this relationship?", "summary": "Told my BF I loved him, now I realize I don't. I want to stay in a relationship with this amazing guy, but I can't lie by continuing saying \"I love you\" back to him. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_ezbew", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So unfortunately I turned in 3 huge assignments on friday RIGHT after the teacher left...", "post": "So last week, I had 3 huge assignments due for one of my teachers. These assignments have made the past week pretty much one of the most stressful weeks of my life, and I didn't even finish until Friday just about when school ended. When I went to go to her to turn it in, it turns out she had health problems and checked out 30 minutes before class ended, leaving me in what I would call an FML state of mind. I rushed to the library and emailed my teacher as soon as possible explaining the situation... but so far she hasn't responded. And it's Sunday. I'm worried sick, Reddit, and I have no idea what I should do. Surely she must understand and not flunk me just because I barely missed her leaving her class... but I'm in doubt. What should I do?", "summary": "My teacher left before school ended so I couldn't turn in  gigantic assignments that my grade depended on. I emailed her but she still hasn't responded. I'm at a loss."}
{"id": "t3_20k9s4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (f20) think I'm in an emotional relationship with my friend (m20). I don't know how I should handle this.", "post": "I have a really close friend who is a guy. We've been friends for 2 years and we're neighbors who spend most of our weeknights together. He is honestly one of the greatest people I know-- I trust him with my life. We're moving in together (platonic) in a few weeks in a new city and we're both extremely excited, but I'm nervous about our relationship.\n\nPeople tease us already that we're dating and his mom is convinced that we're together. We usually just deny it and laugh it off, but I feel like there's some subtext that we're not addressing. We'll playfully tease each other or he'll tickle me randomly when we're hanging out; we're pretty touchy/cuddly with each other but nothing over the top or scandalous. We talk about everything and I feel it's safe to say we're best friends. \n\nThere have been moments where I've wanted to kiss him and be relationship cuddly, but there's always been something holding me back. Like, I can't picture having sex with him at all (not that he's unattractive, I just literally can't see it). I want/can picture kissing him, but the second I try and imagine something more sexual, I can't.  \n\nFuthermore, I can't say I'm too thrilled about him getting a girlfriend either. It's not like I'd ever sabotage anything for him, but I'm not too keen on the idea of sharing him or spending less time with him. I know that mindset is unhealthy, so I'm trying my best to keep it under wraps. \n\nI'm afraid I'm in an emotional relationship with him and I'm concerned about what might happen when we move in together. Any advice or opinion would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "I'm afraid I'm in an emotional relationship with my soon-to-be-roommate. Not sure what I should do or how I feel."}
{"id": "t3_26ujoj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex (27f) and I (27m) mutually broke up about a week ago and she is already trying to find a new relationship", "post": "My ex and I were in a relationship for one year. We now discovered many differences between us and decided to stop our relationship (in a rather negative way, i.e. big fight). She said that she got nothing from this relationship and wondered why she got involved with me in the first place.\n\nOne week later, she posted on fb that she is looking for a new relationship. And I feel very sad about that. Although our relationship was troublesome toward the end, it has its moments that I still cherish. I did care about her and wanted to be with her while I was in a relationship with her. But it seemed like she did not feel the same way. Her wanting a new relationship so quickly hurts my feelings because our relationship appeared not to be that meaningful to her.\n\n* Was what she has done right? or was she being inconsiderate/insensitive?\n* Am I supposed to be feeling like this? Am I too needy/clingy?\n* How should I cope with this?\n* I'm still \"friends\" with her on fb, should I just remove her? I little part in me still wants to go back to her so I don't really want to cut all connections to her.\n\nIf you could be the judge and analyze my situation and provide some feedback, I would greatly appreciate it. I can give more information in the comment if needed.", "summary": "My ex (of 1 yr) and I recently broke up, and my ex is already looking for a new relationship."}
{"id": "t3_1s6z6l", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Tried to teach my dog to play dead. Instead gave him a complex.", "post": "A few months back, I was reading up on how to teach your dog to play dead.  The whole guiding him onto his back with a treat, then reinforcing with praise and reward.  I figured I'd give it a shot.\n\nSo I get home from work and get down to business.  Ozzy's catching on pretty quickly.  Within 10 minutes, I have him rolling onto his back on command.  I was pointing my finger at him and saying, \"BANG!\" as a cue.  Suddenly though, as he's lying on his back, he pees a little.  (In my excitement to teach him a new trick, I forgot to let him out to pee!)  He's obviously ashamed of himself, even though I didn't get mad at him as it was my fault.\n\nAfter we've cleaned up and gone out for a pee break, I attempt the trick again.  Point my finger at him and say \"BANG\".  Ozzy tucks his ears back and slinks underneath my computer desk.  No amount of calling, bribing, or coaxing gets him out until I leave the room.  Since then, he gets stressed when you make a finger gun at him, or if you say the word bang.  He will often try to slink under the computer desk or go into his kennel.\n\nSo my theories on what might be going on:\n\n* He somehow associated the memory of wetting himself to the cues I gave him\n* He's afraid of fireworks and thunderstorms and the loud \"BANG\" is too harsh of a cue word\n* The word \"BANG\" sounds too close to the word \"Bad\" and he thinks that when I point at him and say it, that he's being punished for something.\n\nIn any case, it's been months and I can't even bait him to lie on his back anymore.  Get him to lie down and try to move a treat across his shoulder?  He just goes \"NOPE\" and gets up and looks for his safety desk.", "summary": "Tried to teach my dog to play dead, he wets himself and is now terrified of gun fingers and the word \"bang\"."}
{"id": "t3_4sdsov", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] contacting biological family for the first time", "post": "Hey all, \n\nI wanted to get some advice on how to reach out to biological family members that I've never met. Basically, my mom got pregnant with me with her boyfriend of three years and he told her he doesn't like kids and didn't want to be involved with raising me, which I don't have any hard feelings about. My mom remarried and my step dad adopted me, so I had a father figure who treated me like his own. \n\nI've always been curious about my biological side of the family though and found them on Facebook. I have never reached out because I didn't think I was ready but recently have been thinking about contacting them. I know about a half sister I have from my bio dad's first marriage and she's in her thirties and lives really close by. My bio dad lives across the country. Would it be weird reaching out to her over Facebook? Or should I contact my biological dad first? I don't know if she knows about me so I don't want to shock her with the info or create a riff in the family. I'm really just a stranger to them.", "summary": "Never met biological father or his side of the family. Is it weird to reach out to half sister before making contact with biological father?"}
{"id": "t3_16w61w", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [19/f] am going to college soon and my boyfriend [18, m] of a year doesn't seem to mind.", "post": "So, my boyfriend [18/m] and I [19/f] have been together for over a year. We are very in love...but things are going to be changing soon. I am a senior in high school and he is a junior (we both started school late). I am applying for college and will more likely than not be out of state. He has said that he is ok with that and wants to stay together no matter what. We seem to talk more about him going to college than me...when I am the one leaving in 6 months. He seems less upset than me about my leaving. Sometimes I just think, what's the point of staying together? Another reason I am upset is that last week we went out with some friends and he told everyone that he was leaving in the summer for a month to do an internship across the country. I had to leave and started crying when I got home. I was upset because he didn't even think about telling me this privately first and also because he's leaving before me and doesn't seem to mind. He is still adamant that he will love me no matter how far apart we are... but I'm not quite as secure. Of course, I want to be supportive, but I think it will take time. I sometimes get into phases where I get really insecure, especially in our relationship. This may be one of those phases...but it feels different. I need advice. Am I blowing all this way out of proportion?", "summary": "boyfriend and I will grow distant when I go to college and he goes to an internship. Is it worth staying together?"}
{"id": "t3_4iqygu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 F] with my boyfriend [17 M] He is being mean to me and it's my fault", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together little over a year. I love him very much and I think he's a wonderful person. Lately he's been very mean to me and it hurts but I do deserve it. Early in the relationship I sexted an old friend. My boyfriend agreed to stay with me and move past it. \n\nSince then I have cut off my relationship with that friend and he has access to all my social media. I have not messaged anyone like that at all or done anything suspicious. I feel very guilty over what I did and take 100% of the blame. \n\nThese past few weeks he has been threatening to leave me, making me beg him to stay, calling me stupid, weak, a whore and ugly. I know I did a bad things so I am putting up with it because I know he gets angry about it. He does this when we fight, but otherwise he is the sweetest person I know. I really mean it, this is the only bad side to him. \n\nRecently I've been feeling really depressed and bad about myself. I'm scared to open up anymore because I don't want to be yelled at or lose him.", "summary": "My boyfriend has been mean to me months after I cheated. I realize I deserve it but what should I do or say, if anything?"}
{"id": "t3_20tqos", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I really need some words of wisdom.", "post": "Me 18 her 20. We were so happy together relationship ended and just a couple weeks ago we started talking again back to the way it was it was great. She randomly tells me today that we we stopped talking her ex was talking to her about getting engaged. I live this girl so much I tell her do what you will make you happiest. She tells me that I treat her better than he does and she told him that. \n\nDo I let her try and be happy with another man or do I fight to try and have her back. This woman is the first girl I feel on love with and first I made love with. She has told me for weeks she wants to be back with me. But the other guy wants to marry her.\n\nI just want her to be Happy no matter what she does but I don't want to let her go.", "summary": "woman I first loved if faced with a choice to be with her ex asking her to marry her. Or start dating me again"}
{"id": "t3_221ovc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (21m) dated a 19f for a month, i ruined things and pushed her out of my life, no i want to be friends again what should i do?", "post": "Hey, 21 m here, dated a 19f for a month,\n\nSo a few months ago I met an amazing person, she was everything i could have asked for, we started dating, and i really rushed things ( sexually and labeling whatever we had). After around month she ended things with me. And 5 months later i'm justt starting to get over her. I want to apologize to her for so many things but i feel its wayy too late that i could be giving out the image that i want her back, i don't.\n\nI want her in my life again as she's an amazing person and a great friend\nBut i feel its wayyy too late to apologize to her after 5 months of barely speaking to her.\n\nShould i try to make amends?\nOr should i accept the fact thats its over and just get her completely out of my life even though its all my fault?", "summary": "dated a girl messed things up for rushing it. Pushed her out of my life because i'm emotionally vulnerable, now i want to apologize and ask for her FRIENDSHIP back."}
{"id": "t3_xpbzd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Relationship of conflicting faiths.", "post": "So I've been in a relationship with this girl (Me m/18 her f/17) for about 2 months. Prior to that we dated for a little over 3 months nearly exactly a year ago. The first relationship ended abruptly when her father banned us from seeing each other because I'm an atheist and her father is a pastor and her faith mean an awful lot to her. \n\nThis time her father has been a whole lot less protective of her by allowing us to be together. Unfortunately he still doesn't trust me at all. We aren't allowed to be together alone. My mother or some member of her family have to be with us at almost all times. If we go out in public her twin sister comes with us almost always. He has told me before that this has everything to do with my faith. In the beginning I totally understood his distrust but I thought it would get better over time. Prior to the relation ship we were friends for about 2 years and I had many conversations with her father on various topics.\n\nThis alone would be fine but she also pushes me very hard to change various mannerisms that I have. When she's around I can't really be myself at all. I find myself censoring myself very very often because she would get mad at me. Whenever I listen to my music around her she starts to get uncomfortable whenever the music has profanities or any themes really more than \"G rated\"(I listen to lots of punk rock if that gives you a better image).\n\nI really like this girl but I find myself not being able to be myself around her at all. Anything that I would usually do/say around my friends is everything that she disapproves of. So what do I do? I honestly can't figure out what to do. Any help would be awesome! If you need any clarifications just ask.", "summary": "Dating the daughter of a pastor as an atheist. Dealing with trust issues and her trying to change me as a person. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_49vhdy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [20M] and I [22M] got in a fight and now he wants to talk it over. But I kind of want to stop being friends but don't want to hurt his feelings.", "post": "So a little over two weeks ago, my friend got upset with me because I preordered movie tickets, you can [Read more about that here] but basically, my step dad wanted me to preorder our tickets and then tell him where they are so him and his uncle can preorder the seats beside us, he ended up telling me I was rude and such and I got pretty upset about it as well. We have been having really stupid arguments for the last few months and I'm kind of sick of it, so I figure that even though he is my only friend (he doesn't know this, but he says I'm his only friend he can really hang out with), it's best to just end things.\n\nNow yesterday he texted me saying \"Hey shelcod\" and I stupidly replied back with \"Hey\" because I was curious as to what he would say. He ended up asking to get together to talk face to face and I told him I am unavailable until next week.\n\nNow the thing is I have thought about it more and realize that no matter how I tell it to him, it will end up hurting his feelings and I don't want to make anyone sad. So I've come up with 3 ideas. Would it be better if I just disappeared and said nothing more to him, should I tell it to his face, or should I go and make up with him and then just casually blow off all communication?", "summary": "I got in a fight with a friend. He wants to discuss what happened and I just want to end this friendship."}
{"id": "t3_3l1sy6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (22F) want have sex (again) with my married boss (38M).", "post": "During summer he lives in my hometown and has office here and in his hometown, 100km away where he lives rest of the year. But comes in my hometown regularly.\n\nI approached him. We were fuck buddies during summer before I went to college. No feelings. Usually sex is always better in my head, but this was different, it was damn good. He wasn't married then.\n\nI went to college. He got married. He said that we can continue our 'relationship' but during summer I travelled and worked abroad. Repeated that for 4 years. Minding my own business. We lost touch.\n\nIn June we met in our neighbourhood and he offered me a job. I was planning to go abroad again and he said that I can start when I want. This is my last year at uni, classes are easy and aren't mandatory. So I thought great, it is good job, good money and, most important, it will help me gain experience.\n\nI work there 6 weeks. I want him to fuck me. Now I sit in office, with two other co-workers, he is in his office few meters away and I imagining how he fucks me. No comment.\n\nHe flirts a little when we are alone, nothing inappropriate, we have lunch sometimes... He said that if I want, I just have to send him text and that was it. Didn't mention it again.\n\nI planned to work here until I finish uni and then I will move abroad for good. I have some dates, 'good' old Tinder, but nothing interesting.\n\nShould I quit? Or just shut up and stay strong? \nWorst thing is that I can't trust myself. I am all good for 5 days, don't even thing about him and then in one second everything changes and I am sooo close to click 'send'.", "summary": "my ex fuck buddy gave me a job and now we work together. He is married. I want to have sex again, but that will be just a mistake. How to resist?"}
{"id": "t3_11yvml", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/m] My girlfriend [19/F] is a abstinent, I am not.  This is causing some problems in our relationship, and I need some advice.", "post": "We've been dating a little over 2 months, and she is the sweetest, \nmost perfect girl I know.  The only way I can describe her is that she is the kind of person everyone wanted to grow up to be.  She's never had sex, she's never even tasted alcohol or touched a single drug.  \n\nThis has caused a problem with our relationship, because she wont have sex with me.  At the beginning of our relationship she told me to give it six months and it will happen, however she recently told me that she wants to remain a virgin until she is married.  I don't know what to do.  I really like her but this is a problem for me. I go from not being in a relationship and having sex fairly regularly, to doing without while im in one.", "summary": "Girlfriend won't have sex with me.  I really like her but it's a hard thing for me to do without."}
{"id": "t3_4hb7mq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I am [27/f] in a relationship with a partner [31/M] who hates himself because of a disability.", "post": "I am a 27/f grad student who works part time. My boyfriend, who I am technically broken up with now, is 31 and is currently unemployed but taking classes part-time. He wants to have a full time job by the end of this year. \n\nWe both have our issues and that is putting extra stress on the relationship, but my boyfriend's constant negativity and lack of motivation has become a massive problem. My boyfriend was born with greater than 50% hearing loss in both ears and cannot hear many things without the assistance of hearing aids. He wasn't able to hear well at all until his teenage years and he received better hearing aids that helped him hear many things he could not hear before. While he has graduated from college and held jobs, he still views himself as a victim, even though he can hear well at this point in his life.\n\nHe is seriously the most self loathing person I've ever met. I have tried to encourage him but I'm losing patience. In the beginning I didn't care that my boyfriend was hearing impaired since there wasn't a communication problem at all, he can hear well with hearing aids, and he seemed to be a pretty confident and social person despite his hearing impairment. Now, I am starting to think that he was faking it for the first few months, and he's really just content to be an angry and negative human being. He gets mad every time he thinks someone is looking at his hearing aids, or asks well-meaning questions about his hearing loss. We both know it's going to happen once in a while, but every time it does he just gets mad and shuts down. \n\nHe can be a wonderful boyfriend when he wants to be, and I still believe he is a good person with a big heart. We've decided to just be friends for the immediate future, and try again when we're both ready, but I don't know if I should just forget him completely, or support him from a distance. He has a lot of positive qualities, he is very intelligent, and he is compassionate and thoughtful. I still believe he can turn his life around, but I don't know if I'm getting my hopes up too much.", "summary": "My boyfriend is hearing impaired and is angry at himself and the world because of it. I care about him and think he's a great person,  but I don't know if I should just give up."}
{"id": "t3_v31z4", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I want to cut things off because they will end by the end of the summer, but I have no one else in town.", "post": "My guy (20) and myself (20) are incompatible. We argue over small stupid things, have different personalities (introverted vs. extroverted), and I think are on two different planes of maturity.\n\nWe have been together for about 1.5 years. Met in college, he ended up dropping out by the end of the semester due to grades and family issues. We stayed together LD until the end of the spring semester. I \nended things between us by the middle of June; I couldn't handle it.\n\nWe ended up together again this past December, still a LD situation. We made some great progress in communication and thinking of the other person in our choices and stuff. It was a very different relationship this time around, much better.\n\nThen he told me in late March he would be not be attending the university I am currently enrolled in (like I was anxiously anticipating), but another in our hometown because it was a better situation for him. \n\nFast forward to now. He was officially accepted two days ago. He says he doesn't know how to act or what to say around me anymore because things have just begun to crumble. \n\nWhy would I want to stay with someone I know I won't be with in the fall? Why not let us both be free from the frustration?\nWe love each other still. I'm glad he's going to this other university; it will be a more successful environment for him. But it hurts. I have no friends where I live. My good friends all live a couple hours away, and I don't have the time or money to devote to going out to see them, as much as I'd like to.\n\nWould it be worth it to try to stay with him? Or cut things off now?", "summary": "Socially incompatible relationship ending in August due to unforeseen-ish circumstances. SO is only pleasant friend figure in town. Should I stay or should I break it off?"}
{"id": "t3_39phcf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by forgetting which CD I was listening to when my head unit died", "post": "This wasn't today, this was in the summer of '95.\n\nI was making decent money living at home and lifeguarding during the summer.  Had a car that I had saved up to install a sound system.  I got Infinity speakers, Alpine V12 amp, and a [Sony CDX-C910] head unit.  This head unit was the most expensive, therefore best (teenager, remember) thing I could buy.  It had to be professionally installed by an authorized Sony installer to not void the warranty (or some such bs).\n\nAnyway, it is an amazing CD player, hooked up to a nice amp, powering decent speakers in a bad environment for music; I loved every bit of it.\n\nNow for those who can't imagine it now, we used to have to go to the store to buy CDs.  I lived in a smaller town, but we had a store within about ~10 miles that i bought some of my rarer imports from.  Stuff you wouldn't find in the mall.\n\nOne day my head unit died, no display, no power.  I didn't think to try and manually remove whatever CD was in there.  I scheduled an appointment with the installer of the head unit and a few days later, took it in.  I didn't have a ride, but it was my day off, so I grabbed some CDs out of the car and went into their sound room and chilled out for a few hours reading magazines.  Yes, I said hours(!).  About 3 hours later the installer comes out and finds me.  He explained that they thought it was something simple like a blown fuse.  They found a blown fuse and replaced it, but the sound was horrible.  They troubleshot the whole unit before replacing it.  Twice.  They couldn't figure out what was going on until they swapped out the CD.  That's when he held up the CD I was listening to at the time it died, [Nine Inch Nails - Closer to God (halo nine UK import)] disc 2, and I it all hit me.\n\nFor those that have never heard it - here's the first song on that CD ([Nine Inch Nails - Closer to God](", "summary": "They could have saved themselves some times by using a reference CD of their own, but if only I had remembered what CD I was listening to, I might have saved 3 hours of my life getting a blown fuse swapped out."}
{"id": "t3_1leysd", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "[NSV][PIC] Frustration, determination and the perfect pair of pants.", "post": "So, I started running.  \n\nMore specifically, I started the C25k program in hopes of becoming a *runner*.  Sometimes, it still feels like I might not make it through those last intervals of week 3.   However, after week 1, I learned how tolerable running could be if I just never looked at the timer.   *(\"I still have THAT much time left?  Fff.\")*  Instead, I would zone out, not look at the clock and think about awesome, motivating things.\n\nSince starting on this road, every Monday I would muster up the courage to step up to the scale and be faced with my destiny, my frustration, watching the numbers move in tiny increments or sometimes, not at all.  The numbers shouldn't have mattered so much to me, but they did.  I would get discouraged and lose focus on the fitness goals I was truly trying to achieve.   \n\nI stopped looking at the scale, too. \n\nIf I'd had to guess at what the scale would've said then, it wouldn't have been much different from 2 months ago...  and then my capris humbled me.  \n\nSo, I bought these awesome capris a while ago that had sadly been stretching out in the wash over time.  I loved these capris.  (When you find bottoms you like, you never let them go.)   Hoping to find another pair, I go back to the store and there they are...  one last pair tucked away in a sale rack, but the tag reads 2 sizes too small.   Perfect for \"goal\" clothing! \n\nIn the modesty of my bedroom, I try on these capris to see how far I have to go to get into these babies.  I don't know which emotion was stronger, dismay or delight, when they fit slightly loosely around my giddy little self.    My happy dance quickly turned into: *\"Ergh... now I have to find something else that fits me this well...\"*  Which subsequently turned back into a happy dance after I realized how much easier it's going to be to find clothes that FIT now...", "summary": "Stopped relying on the scale to determine my feeling of progress, kept up with my regimen, and now the perfect pants are too big.  Sometimes, ignorance really is bliss. "}
{"id": "t3_55asbj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23M] have had a crush on [21F] for 2 months without having met or seen her at all. Can it count?", "post": "As title says, I've only been in contact through text (I don't know how she looks). I've known her for around 2 years, but a lot of time has passed within those 2 years without us talking. We recently began communicating more often, and related to that, I fell in love. I've been in love before, but only with girls who I've seen and talked to the \"normal way\". I mean love as in \"I'm prepared to spend my meager student savings to fly across half of the world just to meet her for a day and hold her hand for a second\" love.\n\nIf you asked me what I love/dislike about her, I would be able to list things that I don't love, but they seem irrelevant to me at this moment, and most importantly I dont want to turn this into a study of her, since I would unavoidably skew it to get the answer I want.\n\nShe knows how I feel but highly doubts that I love the \"real\" her in any relevant way. I have my reasons to believe that personal reasons she previously revealed to me before I confessed shapes her opinion in the matter (which is why I'm here for a second opinion). Reasons that are private and really not relevant as long as you accept the premise. Her feelings are ultimately equally irrelevant for this specific question.\n\nMy question is: Am I LIKELY loving someone that only exists in my head? In a way I guess we all love/hate people based on personal perceptions, but you get what I mean. I know she isn't a reflection of me, it's her differences that excite me the most (I think). \n\nI know 2 months is a drop in the ocean, and I could just wait and see if my feelings disappear as quickly as they came (previous experiences hint towards years of feeling like this before it fades).", "summary": "Fell in love with someone I've only communicated with through text. Should I listen to my feelings or should I get over someone who doesn't exist?"}
{"id": "t3_41faao", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] trying to choose between two girls, and I need advice. [16F and 18F]", "post": "I'm a senior in high school, so I'm going to preface this post by saying I'm not looking for something long-term, but I want to have a fun relationship to end the year. \n\nGirl 1 is 16, so she's a little young, but she's very attractive, and we share lots of interests/ have similar hobbies. I've had a bit of a crush on her for a while, but never really did anything. (dating an 8th grader as a sophomore seemed a bit weird)The thing is ,though, I am friends with her older sister, so I don't know if this will end up being a problem.\n\nGirl 2 is 18, and I was told from her best friend that she wants to hook-up with me. She's a very funny girl and also very cute but I've heard from multiple people that she's still not over her ex. She's also much more experienced sexually, which is a positive.", "summary": "Need help choosing between two girls. Girl 2would be a definite hook up, but possibly nothing more, and Girl 1 would be a relationship, but not a long one."}
{"id": "t3_3hbivb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my group of best friends since childhood [26 M]. Our interactions have grown boring, stagnant, and apathetic. I want change, but I don't want to leave them behind.", "post": "Recently, I was taking stock of what I did this summer, and the answer was...not a whole lot.\n\nI have a group of about eight guys I grew up with and consider lifelong friends. People that have met us have said what we have is really rare, some Stand By Me shit. I love them. I was the best man in one of their weddings.\n\nSome have moved and got married, and one in particular is going through some difficult financial times. In those cases, I can understand why I don't see and do things with them as much. It's a natural part of getting older.\n\nStill, though, there's a group of 4-5 guys I see every single weekend. But the problem is we can never decide on doing anything. One person doesn't like clubs. Another doesn't want to spend cash in a bar. Another hates beaches. There's always fighting about what to do. There's always dissent. And it always ends in the lowest common denominator---sitting in one of our apartments drinking and watching TV.\n\nAnd I've reached a breaking point. I'm single, and I really don't have any social circle outside of them. I went to college on the other side of the country, and while I have friends there that I keep in touch with, I see them once a year.\n\nI honestly don't know what to do? I don't even know how to make friends at this point. And I don't want to abandon my friends that I love. Up until a few years ago, things were fun! But for a 26 year-old, single guy living in the city, my life has become so boring and routine that I want to scream.\n\nHelp!", "summary": "My best friends growing up are boring and would rather sit and drink all day then do anything new or exciting. And I'm at my breaking point."}
{"id": "t3_20r858", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my boyfriend [23 M/F] of 3 years doing long distance - i'm loosing faith and getting suspicions.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 and a half years and recently, I've had to move away because of my job. Its only a 2 hour distance but from going from seeing each other everyday to once in a week or in this case, one in 3 weeks ... its hard. He has many more girl friends than boy friends and i am completely ok with that. but recently he's been seeing more of this one friend. today he says that its a good thing because her best friend has got a bf now and therefore, she feels alone and he feels alone too so it work out for both of them to spend time together. \n\nI completely trust my boyfriend and he's never given me any reason to doubt him but i still can't help but feel uncomfortable. I don't know how to address this because I feel its totally unfair of me to say that he cant see her that often or that I am uncomfortable with it coz she is a good friend of his. On top of that, our communication sucks. his phone is crap so he doesnt recieve my texts half the time and he's shit at calling anyone. I don't know how to deal with this and would really appreciate some advice.", "summary": "Long distance relationship. boyfriend spending time with another close girl who's a friend of his since they're both feeling lonely. I'm, very uncomfortable by this and don't know what to do"}
{"id": "t3_4p3n8x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Many of my [25M] friends [~25Fs] want to cheat with me. What is going on?", "post": "First, a little background information about me:\n\nI was never that popular in primary and high school, not a loser mind you, but never super popular.\n\nMy parents are pretty religious (I'm not at all) and strict, and I went to all-boys schools. Because of this, the friends that I had were mostly guy friends, and most girls I knew I thought of as acquaintances.\n\nAfter moving to the big city to attend university I made a decision to not be the weird loner in class, and began the 'fake it til you make it' thing - and I really did make it. I got myself a bunch of really nice close friends and we do lots of stuff together all the time. First time really having female friends.\n\nNow here comes my problem:\n\nMost of my girl friends are in, what I would call, pretty serious comitted relationships, and weirdly enough they want to cheat on their boyfriends with me!\n\nAnd I'm not misunderstanding any weird signals, they are very direct:\n\n* \"My boyfriend isn't home for the weekend, do you want to come home with me tonight and have some dirty fun?\"\n* \"I only asked you to come outside with me to make out with you, if you'd like.\"\n* Etc.\n\nI always turn them down - I never liked the idea of cheating and they know this. One of them even told me the next day that she respected me more now.\n\nI find it really weird that it isn't just one fluke, but many of my friends that try this. And mind you, not the female friends that are single, only the ones in relationships.\n\nWhat I'm wondering is, why do they do this? Is it some kind of weird test of my ethics?\n\nThis isn't normal is it? Am I sending some 'cheaty'-vibes?\nDo I just treat it as a compliment?", "summary": "Many of my girl friends (whom are in relationships) want to cheat with me (single). Why? I'm confused."}
{"id": "t3_1us3o9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF [18F] and I [17M] plan on breaking up before college. Don't know what to feel anymore.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for just over a year and will soon be starting our last semester of school together. Sometime earlier this year, we agreed the best plan of action going into college would be for us to break up, not because we were unsatisfied with the relationship but because we both accepted we needed to develop individually, we could end up geographically really far apart and other things like that. Odds tend to stack against relationships from high school going into college. \n\nI don't know how I feel about this anymore. It doesn't feel good though. \n\nI love her. I fall in love with her again and again every day and the closer we get to this agreement, the more I love her. It seems stupid to love her with the expiration date attached to the relationship, but it feels real and I can't stop. \n\nWe've tried to talk about this quite a few times but the conversation doesn't tend to go much of anywhere because I don't know how I feel anymore. It hurts to talk about it, too. I know what its like to have to leave people close to me and it hurts knowing that know they're just images on my computer or words on my phone or photos on my desk. I don't know if I'm ready to make her a memory.\n\nWhen we first talked about this we were both so certain that, despite the fact we loved each other, a breakup before college would be best. But now I'm wondering if want I really want is to try to make it work past graduation. I need help sorting out my own feelings about the relationship and thoughts about the reality of the situation.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I plan on breaking it off before college despite being in love and all that good stuff, I'm really confused about my feelings and need advice."}
{"id": "t3_4362qv", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by looking like an asshole at the GreatClips", "post": "Today I got a haircut. \n\nI was going to give the Asian lady who cut my hair a tip so I asked her to charge $4 extra on my card like I normally do at this place. Little did I know, they had changed their system to what most consider a normal tipping method where you write your tip on the receipt. \n\nAfter filling out the receipt and handing it back to her, I asked (referring to the new style of tipping), \"How is that for you?\" At first she didn't seem to understand so I repeated it louder, \"How is that for you?\" She looked at the receipt, quickly nodded and said equally loud that the tip was much \"good, good!\"\n\nI was given weird stares on the way out by the other eight or so people there. I didn't realize my mistake until I closed the door. The worst part is that she gave a really good haircut and probably deserved more of a tip but I am poor.", "summary": "While trying to make small talk, I inadvertently asked a foreign hairstylist if my tip was good enough for her while others listened."}
{"id": "t3_gnz6j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "x-post from AskReddit: Girlfriend of three years made out with two people over the weekend. . . What to do?", "post": "I was told to post this here for more advice. \n\n[Original thread](\n\nThe title says most of it. . . We were partying with some friends, and about halfway through the night, one of my buddies asked me if she and I were still together. We'd been having some rough times over the last few months, so I figured they were just asking how that had turned out. I said yes, and so did she. Over the course of the evening, a few more people came and asked me the same thing.\n\nAt the end of the night, one of my good friends came to me a little sheepishly, and told me my girlfriend had gone up to him and just made out with him with no warning. A couple others told me she was \"all over them,\" and I walked in on her making out with another kid that I didn't know so well.\n\nWhen I confronted her the next day, I asked what was going on. She said she \"didn't know what came over her\" and that she was sorry. But I don't buy it. You don't just do that stuff if there isn't something under the surface, right?\n\nI could really use some advice on what to do, how to deal with what's gone on, and where to go from here. She always told me that she'd dump me on the spot if she found out I was fooling around with other people, and that she thought it was completely unacceptable and there was no excuse; so I never thought I'd be dealing with this with her. I'm pretty pissed off, and a little hurt; hypocrisy has always driven me up the wall, so I'm really not sure what to do.\n\nThanks in advance, Reddit!", "summary": "My girlfriend made out with a good friend and another kid at a party and was \"all over\" a few other friends. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_ly4vn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "21 year old female, job interview at GameStop, any other workers who could answer questions?", "post": "I have a job interview at GameStop, I was just wondering if anyone could tell me how much I should dress up for this interview? I don't want to under/over-dress. Also, is this something that I should bring a resume to? I have turned in my application and have gotten the interview, but I also want to get the job. I have previous experience including 3 years as an assistant manager at another retail store. I have since moved out of state for school and left on good terms. I would REALLY like to have this job. Any advice would be appreciated!", "summary": "Job interview at GameStop, looking for advice on how to dress and what to bring. (i.e. resume, any other paperwork)"}
{"id": "t3_ueqq5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Guys buying my girlfriend drinks at the bar", "post": "My girlfriend likes to go out quite a bit, mostly going to bars to hang out with friends or meet people there. Many of the times, I am not with her but she always comes home to me and is faithful. She told me today that she was invited out for some drinks with a guy friend of hers, but she didn't have any money to buy drinks. He said that he would buy her a few to help her out.\n\nHere is where I chimed in. I asked, \"Don't you think its a bit weird for guys to buy you drinks when you have a boyfriend.?\" She doesn't seem to think so and lets guys buy her drinks at the bar all the time. She doesn't mind if strangers buy her drinks at the bar either.\n\nI just think its a bit weird that she lets other guys buy her drinks at the bar when she clearly has a boyfriend. Is it weird for me to think this way?", "summary": "random guys and guy friends buy my girl drinks at the bar when I am not there, is it wierd?"}
{"id": "t3_1buxdn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend (M17) constantly talks about how attractive other girls are, and really messes up my (F17) self esteem.", "post": "We've been dating for fourteen months. My boyfriend has always been very honest with me about everything, which is one of the things I first loved about him. If I asked him a question, he'd give an honest answer, no matter what. My problem with this started about six months ago, when he told me that he liked another girl for the first month of our relationship, and the only reason they aren't dating is because she turned him down twice. It broke my heart. But he's started being honest about things that I really don't want to know the answer to, or question I haven't asked, such as telling me how hot another girl is, or how she has an awesome chest or ass, or along the same lines. Like, I get it. They're all very attractive. He'll always send me links from porn that he finds really attractive.\n\nBut the problem lies in the fact that I have absolutely terrible self image, and with good reason. I have little to no curves, and a bit of extra chub on my stomach. I'm not fat by any means, but definitely not skinny. And every single girl he likes, or thinks is attractive, has a massive chest with a huge butt and is perfectly skinny. Think Victoria Secret model. And if they aren't curvy, they're short and cute and skinny and blonde, which is the exact opposite from me.\n\nThe real kicker came yesterday, when he decided it would be a good idea to tell me he's in love with a fictional character. I freaked out, probably a bit more than I should, but I'm just so tired of it. Once we started fighting over this, he started trying to eat his words, saying that he just meant that she's \"fun to play with\". He had been talking about how she's so cute and perfect and attractive with awesome cleavage for ten minutes before, which is just suppose to traslate into \"fun to play with\". I don't know what to do. I love him so much, and I'm tired of feeling like I'm a second choice behind all these other girls. What can I do? I'm can't feel so worthless for much longer.", "summary": "Boyfriend is very clearly attracted to girls who look nothing like me, and is now in love with a girl from a video game."}
{"id": "t3_38zxdi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (f/23) ex-boyfriend (m/22) of 3.5 years is depressed, but I don't know if I should be there for him.", "post": "Let's call my ex- boyfriend James. OK first off, I don't really know if he's really my ex, since we are pretty much in contact and he keeps saying he will come back to me when he's done growing up. \n\nSo recently, James's father has not been well, and needed to get surgery. Living in Canada, health care is pretty much free, so hospital bills are not the problem. However, because of this illness, he will be unable to continue working for the next 3 years. James has just finished his bachelor in electrical engineering, but has no internships or related working experience. His mother who is also working, says she can't afford working alone to support their family of 5 and is pressuring him to find a job. I don't know what she exactly said to him because I wasn't there, but James last week, cried to me over the phone, saying he needs to find a job and grow up, and to do that, he wanted a break.\n\nJames, for the years I have been with him, has sort of slacked off, and would sort of treat me like shit occasionally, for which I would reprimand him. But I've always felt the need to help him however I can. It's partially my fault, that he has become the way he is, because I was the one pushing him to apply to jobs (I would make his resume and cover letters as well as apply for the jobs for him). He would get interviews, but unfortunately would not pass them. Because of my success with finding jobs and his failure, he sometimes tells me \"you're only getting hired because you're a girl\". \n\nAnyway, he's been feeling really low on himself, but he doesn't really have anyone to support him except me, but he just wanted to be friends until he can figure things out. \n\nI wanted to distance myself from him so he could get the peace he wanted, but he calls me and wants my company, so I don't understand... Why he wanted a beak.\n\nShould I keep supporting him, or do I leave him be?", "summary": "ex just broke up with me because he needed time to grow, but now he's showing signs of depression and wants and needs my support. What should I do? Leave or stay."}
{"id": "t3_2jfmx9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by almost getting run over by an ambulance", "post": "So like many other TIFUs this happened awhile ago. I beleive it was my freshman year of high school when it happened.\n\nI live near my high school so I always walk to and from my house to school. It's about a 10-15 minute walk, and there happens to be a small old persons and adult only hospital on my street. \n\nOne day after school, I was walking home as usual. I had my earphones on and was blasting my music full volume cause I like listening to music as I walk home.\n\nI was just crossing the street on green when I finally noticed that I was the only one crossing and even the cars had stopped. Okay? I though.\n\nSuddenly I look to my right just in time to see the ambulance coming from my street break just before it hit me. It was literally a few inches away from me. I froze for a second, but then broke out of my daze and hurried by.\n\nI still feel so incredibly bad for that, and since then I've never had my music as loud. And I've never walked with both earphones is either..", "summary": "Blasted music with both earphones in while walking home, didn't hear ambulance siren and was almost ran over by said ambulance."}
{"id": "t3_ix1nv", "subreddit": "self", "title": "After nearly a year of countless applications...", "post": "I finally got a job! I've never been so happy to piss in a cup before in my life. I am convinced that even though online job sites have openings in seemingly entry level jobs, that they really aren't hiring. After checking sites like craigslist (only restaurants, everything else  on there is pretty much a scam) and Indeed.com and applying to every position that I qualified for the only place that ever called me in for an interview was McDonald's... and they didn't even hire me! I even tried through a temp agency for a while to no avail. What really pissed me off about the temp service is that the only job they ever wanted to offer me was an over-night housekeeping position at a hospital. I have experience as a housekeeper but I was being upfront and honest when I said that housekeeping isn't something I was interested in doing anymore. I suppose beggars can not be choosy though. Just as I was seriously considering this job, I saw in the newspaper (hey, I was looking in every resource I could get my hands on for a job!) that they had not only one but two ads for jobs that I would much rather do than house keep! One was an administrative job and the other was a production job. When I had called to question why they never offered those positions to me (I was very poignant and called the temp service twice a week to see what was available); they said that was just so that they could get people in to put in applications! I said, why do they need more applications when they can not even find jobs for the people that have already signed up!\n\nAnd I really want to say thanks to reddit because I did take a lot of advice here to heart. I wish I could link to the posts and give due credit. One post was something along the lines of: (Dealing with confidence issues) \"Just fake it until you make it.\" Another post was a very informative post on askreddit about tips for when you actually do get interviews that said that s/he added at the end of the interview, when asked if s/he had any questions said: \"What can I do or say today that will give me this job tomorrow?\" (I totally said this!)", "summary": "I am seriously loving life right now because I found a decent job after 11 months of disappointing searching. Don't give up! Thanks!"}
{"id": "t3_2isoo6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my SO [28 M] of 2 years, don't know if this is all in my head or not.", "post": "Basically my SO and I have been together for roughly 2 years. Our relationship is fantastic, very open and honest. But, around a week ago we were sat talking on the sofa and he took his phone out to show me a photo of his cat. While he was scrolling i noticed a photo of a scantily dressed unidentified female in his camera roll. He clicked on it and was like \"wtf?\" and I was just speechless. Couldn't say anything, didn't know what to say or do. \n\nInstantly he said that he didn't know how that got there and was really confused. He genuinely looked really upset and confused by the situation. I said maybe he accidentally saved it from some website or w/e. He said that he didn't know and couldn't remember watching or looking at porn of said image. I pretty much shut down and just couldn't say anything else for a while. Eventually he tried to talk to me and apologised for me feeling so shitty and said that it was understandable I was upset. I was very upset, but managed to hold my shit together. We had a talk about it and I pretty much said that I knew he wouldn't do anything like that to me etc.. \n\nAnd to be honest I really can't see him cheating on me and having a picture of her on his phone or anything like that. And it wouldn't bother me if it was just an image from porn. But I can't help but feel upset and uneasy about it. I have a lot of doubt in my head, and I don't know if it's unfounded. He's never given me a reason to doubt him before. And I know I probably shouldn't now. \n\nAm I crazy to feel hurt?", "summary": "SO and I stumbled across a risque picture of another female on his phone. He says he doesn't know how it got there but I'm just not sure."}
{"id": "t3_4n20ne", "subreddit": "college", "title": "I have to take an online class (no other options). The professor wants to do an online meeting. I'm a commuter student, and my internet speed is worse than most of the US.", "post": "I failed a math last semester, but just found out- today- that I have to take it immediately again. Summer classes start tomorrow.\n\nI already have summer classes to take, and am going to be doing the online math class before/after those. \n\nThe problem is an email I got:\n\n> I would like to have an on-line meeting on Tuesday, June 14 at 8:30 p.m. using my virtual office\n\nMy other summer classes don't last that long. I'd rather not spend another 9 hours on campus after that... I live off-campus, 30min commute on a good day. \n\nThe biggest thing is that my internet speeds are ass. Just, pure ass. It takes an hour to load a 20min youtube vid at 144p. [Speedtest.net says my internet is worse than 98% of the US.] It's a data softcap. I get 10G of the regular speeds (1mbps) a month. Once that 10 gigs of data is used, it's back to ass speeds.\n\nHowever, I do get unlimited internet from 12am-5am (which sometimes starts at 10:30? or 11? sometimes 3am???).\n\nThe local library closes at 8pm.\n\nI don't know what to do, or what to tell the professor.", "summary": "prof wants to have an online meeting but my internet is so slow i could cry, i live off campus, and the local library closes at 8pm; how do i tell the prof"}
{"id": "t3_2tnwur", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by buying a safety razor.", "post": "I'm the type of man that uses an electric shaver to shave and never have used a safety razor, but yesterday I saw Pawn Star Rick Harrison's single bladed safety razor at the checkout station in Walmart. It looked like a man's man razor and being the alpha male I am I bought it. I brought the safety razor to my jaw and swiped to the right it was the closest shave I've ever had in my life.\n\n After that I started shaving other parts of my sexy body and eventually it got the point where I shaved my beard,chest, arms,legs,ass,pubes, and yes even my balls after feeling like a new man I then hopped into the shower and admired my self in my mirror for ten minutes and then crashed.\n\n I woke up this morning and immediately I realized I fucked up it feels like I have sunburn and tiny paper cuts all over my skin and it fucking burns! My only guess as to what caused this complete fuckup was I didn't apply shaving cream when I was shaving or after shave is this what razor burn feels like?!", "summary": "I bought Rick Harrison's Safety Razor and shaved every inch of my body with it, but forgot shaving cream, and aftershave..."}
{"id": "t3_aspa1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit: I want to lose weight....but am lacking the motivation to just do it...any suggestions?", "post": "I've always had a slight issue with my weight. My lowest weight was when I was 16 at 109lbs and more recently when I was 24 I weighed about 122lbs, now Im closer to 180 (and I'm 27 now). I blame this on my sheer laziness and grad school life as well as my inability to say no to candy and yummy tasting food. This **needs** to stop though because I *feel* unhealthy. \n\nI used to be a gymnast when I was younger, and was super flexible...with this in mind, I decided to go to a yoga class 2 weeks ago and was absolutely wrecked after it to the point where I couldnt do anything physical for a week. I have lost all my flexibility and I'm totally out of shape :( \n\nI want to try a weight loss/exercise program that will work and keep me motivated. I was thinking about combining Weight Watchers with P90X...but honestly I don't even think I could do half the moves in the work out video. Other than that...I am a pretty attractive girl, have a bf who loves me no matter what, and I'm in my last year of my Ph.D....I just want to be healthy and less fat.", "summary": "I'm a lazy chunky grad student female that wants to get in shape and needs redditor energy to get me motivated."}
{"id": "t3_jd0hz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you deal with a dying friend?", "post": "I made a friend back in the forth grade with duchenne muscular dystrophy more than a decade ago. Since then we have been best friends. I knew early on that he was not long for this world but there was never a given time line. I've watched him from being able to lift his hands above his head to not being able to move them at all. He's always been a good conversationalist as his mouth hasn't weakened due to his condition. Now 25 years old he struggles to sit up for more than an hour at a time. I just spoke with his mother and its beginning to sound like my friend won't make it to the end of the year.\n\nI always pictured him dying of a quick complication or something sudden. I pains me to see him reach this state of being, not being able to do anything he loves but mentally all there to feel the pain and frustration. He has lived a pretty good life given the hand he was dealt, it just doesn't seem right for it to end in frustration.\n\nMy friend is a trooper though. He will sit through his pain in a room of his friends than to lie alone in his room sleeping it off. He had me set up his computer in his room so that his other friends would still have something to hang around on even though his confined to his bed for most of the day.\n\nMy friend and I are really close but his death has never been a subject we've discussed and I never hope to. I think we both enjoy discussing video games and televisions show more than wasting time talking about unchangeable facts. \n\nHow have you dealt with the on coming inevitable end of a close friend?", "summary": "my friend has had a terminal illness and is on his last leg and after having the 'its about time' talk with his mother, I needed to get it off my chest."}
{"id": "t3_4c1ae7", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by bathing in my cats' feces.", "post": "Actually happened today!\n\nSo I had surgery last week to repair a torn labrum in my shoulder. I've been mostly lounging around and was starting to feel anxious, so I decided to start cleaning up a bit.\n\nEventually I come up with the brilliant idea to clean my basement, where my demon feline children house their litterbox. I decided that, because I was futilely attempting to clean in the first place, I may as well wash out the litterbox beforehand.\n\nEnter fuck up.\n\nNow an intelligent person would have seen the limits of their powers after barely half dragging the litter box to the dumpster \n\nand asking a small old lady to help me dump it.\n\nNot me though. I got this shit.\n\nAfter bringing casa de feces back to the basement I realize it's still caked in its fair share if shit, piss, and other goodies. I realize that the only way to remedy this problem is by filling it to the absolute fucking top with water and scrubbing the sides with an old rag.\nKeep in mind that this is in and old sink probably about chest level.\n\nAfter I had scoured the box clean and was satisfied with my concentration of piss/shit water, I then realized I only had one arm to dump every thing down the drain. No problem of course, \nshouldn't be any hassle whatsoever.\n\nI was wrong.\n\nAfter carefully starting to tip Shitanic to the side I immediately lost all semblance of control or a plan. As the entire container went over in one fell swoop I quickly realized the the shallow sink was not going to hold this cascading waterfall of terror.\nBefore I could even think about moving, but coincidentally just slowly enough I could open my mouth, I'm hit full on in the face with an Old Faithful of my cats' Seafood sensations lunch of yore.\nEver inch of me from head to tow covered in nasty ass piss and shit water. I even got the opportunity to taste some Friskies after extended marination.\n\nI can feel poop in my eye", "summary": "I dump the water I used to clean my cats litterbox in a sink, ended trying out a new bodywash."}
{"id": "t3_1quz66", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/m] My girlfriend (21/f) asked for us to be good friends, with the possibility of getting back together.", "post": "My girlfriend (or ex now) asked for us to take some time apart. But by time apart, she means time out of relationship. \n\nWe met about 2 months ago and dated for around a month. This was the first relationship for both of us in several years and we were both very excited to start. However, she began feeling too much pressure. She needed time to think if she truly likes/loves me or not and she wasn't able to have that time. \n\nThe strange thing is she wants us to be close friends. She believes that a relationship can only be strongest if two people are very good friends already before establishing the relationship. So she wants to become good friends with me first. We moved along very quickly but she still barely knows who I am and vice versa. Two months isn't exactly enough to get to know someone so deeply. She still wants to spend a lot of time with me. But she doesn't want the burden of a relationship just yet. She said that she doesn't want to be forced to like me just because we're in a relationship. She wants her boyfriend to be her best friend as well.\n\nBut the thing is, she said she wants us to be good friends before we get together again. I also made sure to point out that I'm trying to get back together with her, and she accepted that as well. We only met each other recently but we've grown extremely fond of each other. Just too much stress I guess. \n\nI want to know what to do. I want to know how long I wait before I try again. She didn't give me a time. These things can't be measured in a specific time frame. I really like this girl and she's one of the most amazing people I've ever met. How do I know if we can still work out?", "summary": "Girlfriend wants to become friends, wants boyfriend to be best friend, wants me to grow as a best friend before entering the relationship again, says there is still a chance we'll get back together. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4ifozq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My parents constantly check in on me (21F) when I'm on a date with my boyfriend (20M)", "post": "I'm an only child with very over protective parents. I've been with my boyfriend for 6 months now and I recently started going to his house to hang out.\n\nThe first time I went there, I had a lot of fun watching movies until late with him and his parents. Late as in 2am. I forgot to check my phone till on the way back at 2:30 with 6 missed calls, 4 voicemails, and multiple texts if I was ok. I find that quite excessive. He's not my first boyfriend, nor my first serious boyfriend. I told them where I was going, so it wasn't like they should he surprised as he stays at my house till 1-2am. \n\nYesterday, I went deep sea fishing with my boyfriend and family. I told my parents where and what boat I was going on to try and help out, plus the times we'd be out to sea. I texted them after I got off of the boat and posted pictures on facebook. After that, my phone dies and it was roughly 7pm on the way back to his parents house. I shower, watch a movie, and it roughly 11pm and I remember my phone had died. I plug it in and receive multiple texts if I'm OK, where I'm at, and a phone call. Then the texts start to get rude from my dad saying \"Your mother told me you were shopping for her mother's day present, you better pull it together for her tomorrow whatever the hell you have been doing!\". Obviously he knew what I was doing and I have already bought her something. It was just rude and was sent after I told him I was OK and at my boyfriends parents house. \n\nIs all of this excessive or is it just me? How do I handle this? I don't have to check in when I'm with friends...and I didn't have to with my prior boyfriend.", "summary": "Parents getting my to check in where I'm at with my boyfriend constantly. How do I handle this? Is this excessive or is it just me?"}
{"id": "t3_1gw41o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How does a guy fix the distance growing between him and a female friend?[M26]-[F22]", "post": "I work with her, and she is a good friend. And I actually did grow feelings for her but won't say anything until I leave the job. The thing is, maybe I've been giving too much attention, because she doesn't go look for me anymore, or text me as much. She use to initialize the texts as much as I did. Maybe she already has a hint on how I feels? Overall how do you bring back that closeness you had with a female friend? She's fun to talk to and the thing I don't want is to become distant.Maybe it's the me withdrawing because of my feelings and I'm over analyzing.", "summary": "IDK if it's just me over-analyzing it. We just don't seem as close as we use to."}
{"id": "t3_z70f5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm that other dude, too.", "post": "Hey there Reddit.  \n\nSo about a week and a half ago I met this super awesome girl.  We didn't really hit it off right away.  Guys were swarming all over her.  She asked for my number and we've been seeing eachother and talking on a regular basis ever since.\n\nA few nights ago she met me at a concert and we hit it off right away.  Dancing, kissing, grinding, the works.  For the rest of that night we were holding hands, acting like we were together and it really felt \"right.\" \nShe ended up staying the night at my place.  We stared romantically into each other's eyes, kissed quite a bit, and fell asleep in each other's arms\n\nThis situation seems too good to be true, right? That's because it is.  \nShe went back to her hometown yesterday to apparently see her boyfriend, says her roommate.  She told me she was going to see and spend time with her family.  \n\nI don't want to be wasting my time on a girl who could do the same thing to me, but at the same time I am really falling for her.  \nHow do I confront her about this (or should I even confront her about this)??\nAny other advice?", "summary": "Falling for girl with boyfriend.  Need help evaluating if it's worth it. If it is, how do I confront her about said boyfriend?"}
{"id": "t3_4qj9mp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26F] need help with dating and finding a good LTR. Tell me what to do.", "post": "I've spent my life focusing on more serious endeavors and the last 4 years have been used to study for a degree, volunteer to boost my resume and so on. So most of my choices and actions were to set myself up for the future.\n\nNow I have never had a serious relationship and don't know where to start! I've no regular hobbies to meet men, my friends are also having trouble with dating and my closest friends have also been perpetually single so they can't introduce me to anyone. \n\nI have very little planned for the next 3 weeks and now I'm going to let you all tell me what to do. I mean within reason. What actions should I take to meet some nice eligible men? Throw your suggestions at me!", "summary": "No clue how to date or meet men. Allowing redditers to treat my love life like an interactive story or create your own adventure game. Tell me what to do."}
{"id": "t3_cqrly", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So I bumped into a homeless guy and he spilled his drink... am I an asshole?", "post": "I'm walking down the street in New York, and there's a steady stream of foot traffic going in either direction. Out of the corner of my eye, I'm watching people coming at me when I bump shoulders with a guy and hear a splat of what sounded like some kind of drink behind me. Recalling what I had previously seen, it looked to be an emaciated man carrying an old black plastic shopping bag that I had bumped shoulders with. Thinking nothing of it, I keep walking. Then I hear someone say \"excuse me\" from behind, and realize that I may have knocked the plastic bag out of the homeless-looking man's hand by mistake. Two thoughts pop into my head about what might have happened: 1) this guy is trying to scam me, and probably \"accidentally\" bumps into people and drops things all the time, hoping that they'll overcompensate him for what they've \"damaged\" 2) I genuinely knocked something out of this guy's hand. In the case of the latter scenario, my response is still going to be something like \"well, you should really carry your things away from oncoming traffic if they're that important to you,\" but I figure this homeless guy isn't the type who's going to listen to that kind of reasoning. So I ignore him. I pick up my pace to walk quickly like someone who's in a hurry, but not quickly enough that he could accuse me of trying to evade him. Then I hear \"excuse me\" again. At this point I'm thinking \"fuck, this guy is persistent, and he's definitely not the kind of person I want to get into an argument with on the street.\" I also note that I'm only one block away from the subway station, so I decide to keep my pace up and continue to ignore him. I duck into the underground pathway leading to the turnstile and I hear it again, with heightened urgency: \"excuse me.\" So I make a dash for the turnstile, swipe my card, and jump on the first train out of there.", "summary": "I knocked a homeless guy's stuff out of his hand by accident, and I essentially ran away from him when he wanted to make a big deal out of it."}
{"id": "t3_3yh4dv", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not checking my junk email", "post": "This happened today. If you didn't know, you need a letter of approval/visa to travel to Vietnam. This can be done easily by any one of the search results from Google. I knew that and paid for my visa well in advance. Got my confirmation email and didn't think twice about it until a couple days before my trip. \n\nI went back to my inbox to print out the letter, but it wasn't there. Searched. Nothing. Went through all my email accounts. Nothing. Curses. I emailed the company and tried to Skype them two days before. No replies. Panic mode. \n\nI went to another website that offers expedited visas and paid. My letter should've arrived with enough time for me to board. \n\nNope. I emailed the company and they at least got back to me in a timely matter with bad news. Immigration had a meeting so I would get it later. Double curses. \nI did eventually get my visa and booked the next flight (on standby).", "summary": "Check your junk mail when expecting important emails. Junk mail will typically delete itself after 30 days. Set a reminder and follow up immediately. Don't let it happen to you."}
{"id": "t3_lxmwf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure what to do..", "post": "*I apologize for the shitty, nondescript title*\n\nGirlfriend and I have been dating for about 6 months now, both early 20s.  \n\nShe was in a LDR with a guy for 2 years, and cheated on him a few times with these two different guys.  She dated both of them separately for a bit, broke up, but still hung out with them afterwards.  \n\nShe maintains an awkward relationship with them, and they clearly want to hang out with her still (and are most definitely still into her).  She wants to hang out with them too.  I do not get along with these two guys, they are shady as all hell.\n\nWe have a good relationship now, but lately these guys have been popping up a lot more often and it has been causing me problems big time.  \n\nIs this normal?  Am I being overly jealous, or is hanging out with guys you've cheated on your ex boyfriend with okay?  I also will be away from her for a few months pretty soon, and I'm worried something might happen while I'm gone.  \n\nI'm at a loss, I don't want to lose her but I really can't handle the stress this is bringing me.", "summary": "Girlfriend wants to hang out with ex boyfriends that she has shady past with.  Don't want to limit who she hangs out with, but it's driving me crazy."}
{"id": "t3_3vwz1e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my girlfriend[18F] who is angry on me", "post": "Everething started last friday, we were on the party and I drunk to much, she was angry for me for that, but I apologized her and she said that she forgives me. \n\nAnd last week I said I take her on the concert, but I need to get tickets first. And I got the tickets. My mistake was I tell her about it day before the concert and she said she can't go. In day of concert She was angry about it and she said that I prefer go without her but with friends and I lie to her. I said that is not true and from the begining I wanted to go with her. I feelt bad for that she even could has thoughts like that. She was angry but later she said that ok. I said that I don't know now if I want to go to this concert by myself, and she said that I should. \n\nThis morning I said her that I was on this concert but I couldn't enjoy it. She said that I want to arouse pity in her and she doesn't want to talk. What should I do now?", "summary": "My gf said that I want to arouse pity in her and she doesn't want to talk. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3b3i0y", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by moving my paraplegic wife", "post": "This happened 4 days ago actually but I was so scared in the past days that i didn't have the hand stability to write on a keyboard\n\nMy wife and i had an accident and she's on a wheelchair (she started moving her legs again but still a long way to go) so it was nighttime and she asked me if i can turn her upside down, when i am moving her suddenly the weight of her leg shifts her lower body and i hear a crack... (like when you crack your back) the first thing she says is... I can't feel my legs.. I almost fainted right there, I try to calm her but I know what that means (I am en EMT) so i do the sensible thing... its 1 am and i have to call an ambulance.\n\nOnce we arrive at the clinic she's crying because she knows what this means, i speak to the doctor and tell her the situation, the doctor says \"uff\" confirming my deepest fears, she has X-rays done and an MRI, we had to wait almost 2 days for the specialist to arrive but i had already seen the X-rays and saw no changes on them, after the specialist saw the MRI said there were no changes, and we could breathe.\n\nThey sent us home with anti-inflammatory medicine and our regular exercise schedule, a day later (yesterday night) she said \"Baby i can feel my legs again... i was happy and today she said, I can move my legs as i used to... I could finally breathe.\n\n(Sorry if english no good, english me not first language)", "summary": "Tried to move paraplegic wife, cracker her back, sensation in legs gone. Exams show no lesions, 2 days later she is moving her legs again."}
{"id": "t3_1c8xob", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is this fling fizzling?", "post": "Both in our mid 20s. I have been sleeping with a girl for over a year now. We work together and when it started when she still had a boyfriend. It happened under circumstances I am not proud of.  She came to me when her relationship was fizzling out, and I think she needed me to see if there was any hope of re-igniting a flame of passion that she has not had in a while.  I was the other man for almost 6 months.  Then we decided that had to stop.  \nWe took a pause for a few months, but since we work together, we still constantly saw each other.  So when I find out she moved out of her shared apartment and broke up with her boyfriend, we start it up again. \n\nThings are great for a month, but then something happened.  I can't pinpoint it, but the passion is gone.  We both used to stare at each other with passion, and we used to make love with passion.  Over the past month, she has stopped doing anything romantic, surprising or spontaneous.  \n\nI think I have a high sex drive, and I like to have sex everyday. For the first few months we had sex 3 times a day, but now, after about 4 months of this, we only have sex maybe 1-2 times a week.\n\nI care about her a lot, and I was kind of hoping that it could be something more. She says she still isn't ready to get into a relationship, which I understand.  We had agreed at the start of this that we were just going to keep it to casual sex, but we both understood that we had feelings for each other. \n\nNot sure if I should just let her be for a while, move on or keep with it for a while longer.  Again, I felt like I was falling for this girl a few months ago, but I feel like now she is fighting it.", "summary": "Relationship that started under shady circumstances actually has a chance now, but doesn't seem to be sustainable/realistic...should I give it time or just drop it. Thought I was falling in love."}
{"id": "t3_16h9mo", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What was the fallout after a person you were dating dropped \"I love you,\" and you lied when responding \"I love you too.\"?", "post": "This happened last week, after dinner and drinks, and during sex. She said it, and I fucked up and responded in kind. Told her the truth tonight, and she stormed out. It's over. \n\nI feel horrible, but she did drop that on me right in the middle of a drunken melee. I should feel honored and lucky that someone feels that way about me.\n \nWe dated a couple of months last year and had only recently started dating again, and this happens. Tonight I acted like she didn't say it, and when pressed, I told her the truth. \n\nI only hope I haven't fucked her up too bad. She doesn't deserve it. \n\nI'll start another thread about why I'm so wishy-washy, but here's this: Has anyone else experienced this? How'd it work out?", "summary": "Girl says \"I love you\" during sex last week. I lied and said I loved her too. Told her the truth tonight and she bolted."}
{"id": "t3_3v1oe1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being an Insensitive Jerk", "post": "So like many others, this happened last year but I am still mortified as our office just recently had a congratulatory card recently that reminded me of the tragedy. \n\nI work in a corporate office building, and many times theres a designated person that walks around getting all the employees to sign a happy birthday, get well, congratulations card. \nOne day I was extremely busy with audits, reports, reviews, and the girl designated for this card signing approaches me. As I am multi-tasking, she in her ninja ways sneaked up and whispered, \"hey sign this\". without any saying anything else. I didnt take a very good look at the card, and opened it up, and didnt really read or even glance what other peoples comments are and what they wrote, the girl asking me to sign the card didnt say what its for. \nI signed Happy Birthday! Enjoy - My name, gave it back and went about my work.\n\n15 minutes pass by and I get a minute to breathe, I overheard one of my staff members talk to another, saying, its so sad.. I hope they are doing ok... it was then that I noticed I fucked up. I immediately got up and asked them what they are talking about.. and they told me so and so's mother passed away. \n\nIt hit me... I just wrote happy birthday on a condolences card... \n\nI told a few specific people in the office hoping they would relay my apologies to the person I decimated with my insensitivity, but I never worked up the courage to apologize to that person face to face. No one has said anything since, but I am sure they hate me deep down.", "summary": "I was multi-tasking and not paying attention and wrote happy birthday into a condolences card for a co-worker."}
{"id": "t3_2b5h8x", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "A bill paying trick that helps me track and lower monthly expenses.", "post": "This may be obvious to some, but it has helped me get a much better picture of my finances. For years I struggled with paying bills, sometimes because of low income but just as often because I was disorganized. After making simple changes to my bank account structures I don't miss bills, have lowered my spending and can understand my expenses better.\n\nThe trick is pretty simple. Open a checking account for all your reoccurring expenses. Then go about setting them all on auto-pay. Most of the time you can connect the bank numbers or use a debit card to automate payment. If you need to pay an individual or have to pay by check most banks have a bill pay feature that will send scheduled payments by check.\n\nAt first you'll need to overpay into this account because your expenses estimate might be off and you need a buffered balance. After a couple of months you'll be able to pay in almost exactly what you need. Then you can setup automatic deposit to cover all your expenses.\n\nCongratulations, your financial life is now completely automated. Did you remember to pay such and such bill? Yeah totally. Analyzing your accounts it looks like you're paying for a lot of online storage. Google sells space cheap. Consolidate accounts and save. Get hit with an unexpected bill? There's plenty of buffer in the account, just pay a bit more in to make up and move on.\n\nIt can take a while to move all your accounts over, but once you do the benefits of organization are massive. Also, once you make that one or two payments into the account per month (pay into it right when you get income) whatever remains is your spending / saving money.", "summary": "Get an account for reoccurring expenses. Set the account to auto-pay all your bills, rent, car payments, etc. It's much easier to see how much you spend and much harder to forget to pay a bill."}
{"id": "t3_3w2jvy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] am confused about my feelings towards my best-friend of almost a year [24 F]", "post": "I met my current best friend online almost a year ago and we just got along instantly. We shared personal thoughts and feelings and got to the point where we talk every day, usually multiple times. We'll watch TV shows together on Netflix, play video games together or just talk when we're bored. We live a couple hours away (by car) but have spent two weekends together in person and both had a great time. When I met her, she was in a long term relationship and I was totally happy with just being her friend. She's recently single and I have been struggling with trying to figure out if I just love her like a best friend or if I'm in love with her. \n\nI've dated a couple girls in the past but have never connected with one like I have her. I'm just afraid of regretting losing this opportunity to see if we want to be more than just friends. At the same time, I'm afraid of \"What if things didn't work out?\". I wouldn't want a failed relationship to ruin our friendship. While her last relationship of many years was a very long distance relationship (different country), I don't think she'd want to jump into another one even if I only live a couple hours away. When she was going through her break-up, which she is still slightly struggling with, I remained completely neutral and was very supportive of her to choose whatever option that makes her happy. I love her and all I want is for her to be happy. But now, I find myself being sad at random times over the confusion about my feelings. \n\nHas anyone been in a similar situation? What should I do so I don't regret my choice in the future? I could tell her how I feel, I'm not really afraid of whether or not she feels the same but more afraid of how her not feeling the same way would affect our friendship. I know she uses Reddit just about as much as me, and she would totally know this is about her if she read it, so I'm going to just hope that doesn't happen. I didn't really know where else to go to ask for help.", "summary": "I'm not sure if I just love my best-friend like I should a good friend or if I'm in love with her."}
{"id": "t3_s0s8x", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Found postage, who wants mail?", "post": "So yesterday I went to the post office to mail out some packages. I used the APC (Automated Postal Center) like I always do [saves time dealing with the lines]. I purchased some shipping labels and went to grab them below. At first I thought the machine had printed the first label wrong, but then realized it was an extra. Someone had mistakenly left it - I guess they didn't understand how the machine worked. So now I have an extra label/stamp for the city of Syosset, NY (11773). I'd be happy to send a random letter/postcard to anyone in this area. I hate seeing things go to waste. Feel free to P.M. if you'd like. Thanks.", "summary": "Have $0.65 postage to Syosset, NY (11773). Need to use it. P.M. me if you live there."}
{"id": "t3_3axy3r", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by writing a fake TIFU", "post": "So, I thought I'd see how easy it could be to write a fake and yet relatively believable TIFU.\n\nAbout an hour and a half ago I had finished my masterpiece, ready to deceive all of you. This fake story involved me having sexual intercourse with two of my cousins a couple of years ago and some supposed pictures I'd taken on a disposable camera which i'd kept. The fake story went on, detailing how while I was away my mother decided to develop the pictures on said fake camera, as in this made up world we'd recently lost some family photos and she had hoped there would be some on there. In this fake story of course she went mad once eyed been developed and she's seen the non existent photos. \n\nSo now you know about the fake story, I can go back to when I'd just finished writing it - happy with my work, I went downstairs and decided to take the dog for a walk, i was about 35 minutes. I get back, my computer was off - all cords unplugged, everyone out of the house, phone off the hook. Clearly, one, or all of my parents have read this and phoned someone or something. Sorry this is terribly written I'm writing this from my phone and not in the most coherent state right now. How the fuck do I explain this one..", "summary": "I made a fake TIFU detailing false incest threesome, my family have seen it while I was out, now I'm fucked."}
{"id": "t3_cduzh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is stashing a bag of dirt in my sister's luggage a bad idea?", "post": "My sister and I have a game that's been going on for the last decade or so where we hide a bag of dirt among each others possessions.  She's going travelling in the fall and I wanted to hide it in her luggage so she'd have to cart it around for the two and a half months she's planning on going for.  I was wondering about possible implications with customs, other than a few odd looks.  She's going to Australia and the Philippines for sure as well as a couple other countries in southeast asia and I assume she'll pass through the US.  Would she get any grief about bringing in foreign contaminants or whatever?  I realize she could just throw the bag out if need be, but I don't really want that to happen.  It's a small ziplock bag of very dry soil with a bit of mulch in it, probably less than 25 grams total (<1 ounce).", "summary": "I want to put a small bag of dirt in my sister's luggage but don't know if that will get her in trouble with customs."}
{"id": "t3_1mhje2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend (24M) thinks I (18F) should be 'better' than him? What..?", "post": "A little about both of us:\n\nTogether for 6 months. Its been a great learning experience for both of us and we come from similar backgrounds with a lot in common, however\n\nI tend to push him in areas where he lacks like school and work. He appreciates it and says he wouldn't be where he was without me, however, he nags me CONSTANTLY about going to the gym (I go twice a day), my eating habits(vegan), sleeping habits, and grades. His are admittedly much worse than mine.\n\nWhen I tell him \"I like you the way you are and I want you to want to improve yourself first. I don't feel like I have the authority to tell you those things\"' he tells me he holds me to a higher standard than himself.\n\nI've encouraged him to come on runs with me (he's lucky enough to be in great shape, but who doesn't want to look and feel better) buy him protein drinks to bulk up ( he says he wants to) , left him alone to study, make goals for the future to work harder, encouraged him to hang out with friends, etc, and he sits in the house all day and brushes it off.\n\nWhat do I do if I finish college before him (which is likely) or bypass him in any areas of life later down the road? How do I make him want to be better before I think I'm too good for him and leave? Is this even normal?", "summary": "boyfriend thinks I should be 'better' than him, says I'm better than him and asks why I even like him."}
{"id": "t3_2zxt2d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [17 M] new girlfriend's [16 F] parents won't let us see each other", "post": "So me and this girl began seeing each other about a month ago, and have gotten quite serious quite fast and we are completely head over heels for each other.\n\nThe problem here is that we never get to see each other due to how overprotective of her parents are, she is literally never allowed outside the house . At first this wasn't too much of an issue, we'd skype everyday, she'd see me for 10/15 minutes after school at my bus stop (even this was limited as my friends would be there). Recently though, her parents have found out about me, and deemed that I am too much of a distraction from her studies, and that she is no longer allowed to see me or even Skype me.\n\nWe're now questioning where this relationship is going, and if there is anything we can do, because we're both so desperate at this moment in time. Unfortunately at this point she doesn't seem to be willing to lie to her parents so that's out of the question at the moment.", "summary": "New gf's parents are overprotective, won't let us see each other, how do we make this work"}
{"id": "t3_2h4de7", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [M/18] am fed up with one of my friends'[M/19] behaviour. Am I thinking to much about this ?", "post": "So, I have been friends with this guy since 6th grade. Because he lives 14km away and went to a different school than I we only talk online in voice chat room and meet IRL sometimes at a party or go for a movie night with some othe guys. But since we both finished school this year and there is a 3-4 month period of nothing to do between end of school and university starting, we have been hanging out online every day. He is rather slow and relaxed, but gets pissed really quick if something is not to his liking, which, while playing online games, happens quite often.\n\n Now most of the time I am not the target of this, but when he sees me as the cause of his anger and lashes out towards me, I react and it ends with us shouting and one of us leaving. This happend about 4 times in 7years but when it does, he goes into his sulking phase where he activly avoids me and then after a week or so, when I want to talk to him, tells me that he needed \"time away from me\". And when he goes into his sulking phase I just know that this is the phrase I am going to hear sooner or later. The cause of our anger are seldom big matters, for example I joined a rival clan of his because they asked me to be a member while his clan rejected me although I know their leader IRL. Trivial, right ? Or I denied knowing two close friends of his in front of a group of new people I met, because they made neo-nazi statements.\nThe current event was about him thinking of me as urging him to hurry up after he made some friends and myself needlessly wait on him and me calling him out on that.\n\nSo, r/relationship_advice. Are these just normal clashes among friends ? Am I thinking to much into it ? Should I change my behaviour ? As someone who doesnt become friends with someone easily and values his friendships above all, this is an important matter to me.", "summary": "Long time gaming/IRL friend actively avoids me for a week after small fights, returns saying that he needed time away from me. I am pissed about his behaviour and want to know if its justified."}
{"id": "t3_2szb56", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "17/m I'm the other guy, need help.", "post": "Hi, I am a 17 year old guy in junior year of highschool, and the other day I might have done something not all that great. I have this friend named (lets call her Patrice) who has this really shitty boyfriend(lets call him Doug) who has forced her to do some really terrible things, for instance he forced her to suck his dick, and when she asked to stop, he told her to shut up and consistently sends dick pics to other girls. To further add details on this, she's extremely dependant on him and fears to be alone which is why she hasn't ended up breaking up with her. So, anyways, my friends have been trying to hook me up with her because they want her to stop dating him, I didn't really know much about her except for that she is really fucking hot, so of course I agreed. I invited a bunch of friends over to my house to have a party. Most of them didn't end up coming, but Patrice did. We were chatting it up, until I made the grave mistake of asking her to make out (don't judge me i'm an idiot).  She was hesitant, but looked at her friend for confirmation. She, the friend, said its fine, which then led up to Patrice saying don't tell Doug (I don't really know the name suits him), so we made out. Afterwards, she felt really guilty because she still thought that she still loved him even with all the things he has done. My friends still want me to go out with her, but I don't really know how to approach it. Any advice would be great.", "summary": "made out with a girl whose boyfriend is a cunt and in a way abuses her, and I'm really questioning my ethics\u2026 Am I in the wrong?  Did I mess up?"}
{"id": "t3_1b247r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I (19f) selfish for being worried about my boyfriend's (18m) sudden lack of concern about school?", "post": "We've been dating for a little over a year, and recently he started to smoke weed again (he stopped at the beginning of our relationship because I had a problem with it, but now I don't mind, it's up to him, ya know?), and since then he's started to really care less about school. He hasn't gone to a single class in over a month, he sits around smoking and playing video games. I'm afraid for him, he had kind of a rough fall semester, and if he doesn't maintain a certain GPA he gets kicked out completely of the college. I really don't want to see him mess up like this, but the few times I've tried to bring it up, he tells me not to worry, he can make his own decisions, he'll be fine, etc. Of course I'm genuinely worried for *him*, and what his life will be like if he does flunk out but I'm also worried for personal reasons. Whenever he gets stressed, he tends to be kind of a jerk to me for a while. I get ignored, lashed out at, he doesn't want to be around me, and things like that which is one of the reasons I'm worried - no one likes being a target. I'm also worried because if he flunks out, he'll have to return home and that would effect our relationship. We've had disagreements about other things and he's told me that I tend to be really selfish in our relationship (even when I don't think I am), but am I selfish for being concerned about his school because of how it would affect us? Is there anything I can try to do to make him get his stuff together?", "summary": "My boyfriend has stopped caring about school completely, I'm worried about him for genuine reasons, but I'm afraid they're coming off as selfish."}
{"id": "t3_z11sp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Past issues I thought I had come to terms with came back to the surface and I wasn't prepared.  27M 20F", "post": "About 10 months ago my GF(20F) of 1 year told me(27M) about her past as an escort.  It was completely against her will and started as just rapes organized by her at the time BF.   I thought I had dealt with this.  Literally didn't think about it for months now.  \n\nThen we were watching Drive and she started acting funny when the shoot out started and as he's holding the girl down on the motel bed.  She was reacting to the gun violence, but it triggered my mind.  And it all came flooding back.  To be clear I'm not upset with her.  Never blamed her, still don't.  Her life was hell and when you have no support bad stuff happens easily.\n\nHowever I can't stop thinking about wanting to bring harm to her ex.  I've caught myself looking for him as I drive to work (he works down the street) again.  Literally feeling sick today that this guy is out there walking around enjoying life like nothing happened.  Also upset with myself that I am this obsessed with wanting to crush someone's world when I've never even met him.\n\nI love this girl to death, she means everything to me.  She's off her meds now and dealing with it herself so she's not as willing to talk about it at the moment.  So I feel completely stuck.  I've dealt with it before but I had her help.\n\nAnyone have any advice?  We move 1.5 hours from home into an apartment together in 4 days so at least driving by the motels she used to be taken to is not going to be an issue anymore.  But that guy is still just down the street.  I know the obvious \"talk to her\" and will be, but right now I'm so stressed with Moving, work, getting my car fixed, etc to really have a proper conversation.", "summary": "Thought I was over GFs troubled past.  Came flooding back a few days ago and I've worked myself sick thinking about it.  Looking for advice on how to get over this again."}
{"id": "t3_3snsmf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [35F] with my husband[40M] and parents [60sF/M], married 10 years, Thanksgiving plans crisis", "post": "My husband and I have been married 10 years and have two kids under 6. We live about 90 minutes from my parents. I'm not super-close with them but generally have a good relationship. \n\nFor the last few years, we've hosted my parents and sister for Thanksgiving. We enjoy cooking and hosting, and honestly it's easier and more comfortable for the kids. We were going to do the same this year. \n\nBut this year, plans are suddenly up in the air because:\n\n* My mom just got out of  the hospital for something fairly serious, and is a little iffy on making the drive.\n\n* My sister moved out-of-state over the summer and is driving back on Thanksgiving, but won't make it to their place until around 5 in the evening. My house is even further.\n\nSo my parents would like to host this year, both to save them the drive and so Sis can be at the dinner more easily. My husband says dinner can be at their house but he wants to make the turkey. I told my parents this and they basically think it's a lot of trouble. I also think it's a lot of trouble and borderline rude to insist on bringing the main dish. My husband was pissy when I told him this. My suggestion he talk to them and work it out did not go over well. (Possibly because I was pissy about him being pissy by that point.)\n\nSo, what should I tell my parents to avoid this turning into a huge fight where everybody feels insulted? I honestly don't care who makes the stupid turkey as long as I get to eat some.", "summary": "Husband wants to make T'giving turkey. Parents also want to host meal. How do I keep everybody happy?"}
{"id": "t3_4eyqpd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18/M] have made mistakes making my intentions clear to [18/F] and I may have made it unnecessarily complicated", "post": "I have known this girl for about a year, and I am certain I like her and I am almost certain she likes me. She has done all kinds of things convince me she likes me. \n\nWe had food together (just the two of us) a few weeks ago, she got tinder the moment I mentioned it in a conversation, and she kissed me on the neck and cheek at a party the other week. There seems to have been some attempts to make me jealous. My friends mentioned her and another friend was about to go into a relationship when that clearly wasn't the case, they were both clearly not really into it. When I was mentioned in a similar context she almost died of embarrassment (she hid under her arms for a few minutes and went bright pink). We have also told each other very deep and painful parts of our lives, and she has been very good with me about it and said she would always be there for me.\n\nHowever, I think I have not been responding in the right way. When she kissed me I was tipsy and quite shocked so I didn't kiss her back like I really wanted to. I also told her I didn't want a GF a few months ago, when I did but thought that she was too high up socially, and later on she said she didn't want a BF for very similar reasons to me. I also got interrupted today so I didn't get a chance to ask her out like I wanted to. She seems to have been quite down in the dumps this week, and I have only talked to her twice. She told me some sad things about her and I wanted to hug her so badly, but If I had I think I would have been laughed at by others.\n\nI really haven't got any idea of what to do, and I don't see her again until Monday at least. I don't want to ask her out by text since that is really impersonal. Ideas?", "summary": "She likes me, I like her. I have made a ton of mistakes and made my intentions unclear. Unsure how to solve."}
{"id": "t3_1l4i4x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [18F] overreacting about my boyfriend's [20M] relationship with his past fling?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for a while, but had a breakup in January after he started his first semester at a new school. During the time we were broken up, he had a fling with a girl over a period of close to two months. He would spend the night at her apartment frequently but as far as I know, it didn't progress past making out and some groping. She admitted she had feelings for him, and he ended the physical part of their relationship because he didn't feel the same way. We got back together in late June.\n\nMy issue here is that they are still best friends, and he hangs out with her, or her and her roommates (who are also his friends), nearly every day. I'm not a jealous person when it comes to his other female friends, but because of him being back in the place where our relationship ended and his physical involvement with this other girl began, I can't stop feeling horrible. I trust him, and I love him, but I don't know her well enough to trust her. His opinion is that I need to just \"get over it,\" but that's been really difficult. I asked him if he could potentially cut down on the time he spends with her to two to five days a week instead of every day, which he felt was an \"unreasonable request.\"\n\nI know I'm being jealous, but the amount of time he spends with this girl is really bothering me, and the way it's causing me to feel is putting our relationship in danger. Help?", "summary": "Boyfriend wont cut down on hanging out with a previous fling he had during a break, and it's bothering me quite a lot recently."}
{"id": "t3_iytz2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dropping everything and leaving my life behind tonight, any suggestions?", "post": "I'm packing up my shit and leaving tonight. I'm a 20 year old male who's been dicked around by just about everyone in his life (\"omg 20 years old get over it\"), and is sick of it. I'm not stupid, I realize this is a bad idea, but I really have nothing left. My parents have been promising to sign school loans for three years and have yet to fulfill that promise (which is fine, I don't care anymore). I have been living with my grandparents house and sharing a car with them for about a year now, which is making me feel worse, because who wants to share a car with their grandparents? I was going to move in with my girlfriend in a week and start a new job in the city, but she changed her mind and said she \"wasn't ready for us to move in together\" after knowing each other for 10+ years, so I decided breaking it off with her would be for the best. I'm not doing this as some pretentious, angst-driven statement against my parents or anyone else, I just want some different for myself, and this isn't cutting it for me. Anyway, my question is, any tips for someone who's about to take off with $200 in their pocket and a duffel bag full of clothes? Have any redditors ever done something like this before?", "summary": "$200 to my name, bag full of everything I own, making my own way with no one else. Tell me what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1zyfd3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I (18/M) write to this girl (18/F) i met at the club the other night?", "post": "Hey guys\nI'm not sure if this is the right subreddit, but here it goes.\n\nSo this past week I was in a foreign country with some friends. We went to a club one night and met a group of girls and shared a table with them. \n\nThis one girl and I started dancing and in no time we were making out. I don't know for how long, could have been 5 minutes, could have been 30 (too drunk to remember). I don't remember how we were separated either. \nWe were supposed to meet them again the day after, but for some reason we were late and many of them just went home. She didn't though. \n\nThey were three girls who had waited for us. We went to a bar that night and I sat down next to her. We talked, but the conversation didn't go to any personal level. \n\nWe ended that night with a quick hug. The day after I (and my group of friends) went back home. I added her on facebook.\n\nIt has now been 4 days since the night we were making out and I just feel so empty. Now I'm always tired and quiet and just can't stop thinking about her. I want to write to her, but I don't even know if she feels the same way. \n\nSo my questions are\nDo I write to her or not?\nIf yes, what do I write?", "summary": "Met a girl at a club in a foreign country. Now I'm home and don't know if and what I should write to her."}
{"id": "t3_hgarw", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Reddit, how can I deal with my bitchy roommate?", "post": "I live in a two bedroom apartment with two girls in each room bedroom. Recently, one of the girls from the other room decided that the best way to tell us things was through passive-aggressive notes put in certain places as seen here:  (those are not the only ones). \n\nOn top of that, she now decides that she hates my boyfriend because he comes over too often (in MY room, where she doesn't even have to see him), and because he doesn't lock the door when he leaves. She has called him a \"douchebag\", \"faggot\", \"dick\", etc. straight to my face, and told me to tell him to go home. She has no reason to even think that because all he's ever been is respectful to her and has even done favors for him.\n\nThe thing is, if she had been nice about it and told me directly that she had problems with something, I would be much more susceptible to change. But when she simply leaves notes all over the place and then blows up and bitches people out when things don't change, I have no respect for her.\n\nWhat should I do? :/", "summary": "Roommate is a passive-aggressive bitch who lacks communication skills and brain cells. Apparently hates my boyfriend and doesn't want me to have him over. How do I deal?"}
{"id": "t3_4nzkkh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my girlfriend[19F] 4 months, long distance ideas?", "post": "Me and my gf met each other online and still have not seen each other in person. That has not stopped us and we video chat often, and even fall asleep to each others faces on Skype. \n\nI will be leaving for the military and am putting together an \"Open When\" letter box for her and stuff to hold her over while I a away. Yes, I know it usually works the other way but I wanted to surprise her.\n   \nAnyway, I will be putting things like photos and gifts. She is worried because she has gotten used to falling asleep with me like over the phone. I want some ideas on how to like... be there when i'm not there. I don't know about a video or voicemail that she will play on a loop because I feel like she will over play it and it will lose it's meaning. What are some ideas for a long distance couple that wants to feel like the other is there when we can't be?", "summary": "video chat a lot and sleep together over phone. How can I simulate this \"being there\" when she cant call me?"}
{"id": "t3_xauqd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is there a chance that I [19/m] am screwing this up with my (19/f) girlfriend?", "post": "We've developed an extremely strong semi-long distance relationship. She only drinks on very few occasions and only smokes hookah every once in a while. I smoke weed/tobacco, drink, and do other drugs almost daily. She says she doesn't care, but I still refuse to smoke a tobacco product in front of her. We both fully plan on staying together throughout college and eventually ending up together. She seems to truly not care and we both believe that I will calm down as I develop more of a routine and grow up, and I believe that at this age if we are to stay together this age is the last chance I have to do these 'wild' things.", "summary": "Do you believe that I should give up this habits right now, just in case she is bottling up feelings and actually DOES care about those things, or should I just allow myself to naturally quit?"}
{"id": "t3_41fz0l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] with my girlfriend [22F] of 7 years have vastly different sexual pleasures. Is this something that will become a constant sore point for the rest of our lives?", "post": "Me and my long term girlfriend have been together for a little over 7 years now. We have been in a long distance relationship for the past 3 years due to our studies. We long our virginities to each other and from there we began to explore a bit.\n\nI have been watching porn for 10 years and have built up various fetishes and sexual desires. My girlfriend on the other hand had barely begun to touch herself when we met and had little to no idea about what she liked or what she wanted to try. So we used my 'knowlegde' to try several things and see what we liked.\n\nDuring this time we tried several things ranging from your normal passionate sex to public sex and from mild bdsm to anal. What became clear after several years of exploring is that we both have quite different tastes. She prefers passionate normal sex and occasionally being restrained. I'm into things such as anal play and exhibitionism. She is very specific about what she likes now and I'm still very open and willing to do pretty much anything. This is starting to bring a bit of conflict as I become bored with all of these restrictions she has now put in place so that she stays in her comfort zone.\n\nIt's difficult for us both to enjoy sex to its fullest extent at the same time as I want to do certain things that she won't do and she wants to do things that we've done a thousand times and don't really excite me anymore.\n\nI'm not going to pack in the relationship over this as I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I want to know if this is going to be a source of conflict for the rest of our relationship, and if anyone has any advice or ideas regarding this?", "summary": "Me and my girlfriend are into different things in a sexual sense. How do we reduce or deal with conflict regarding this?"}
{"id": "t3_1eez79", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Former roommates took my returned security deposit. What do I do?", "post": "Hello Reddit. The problem in the title has been presented to me recently and I don't know how to approach it. Last August I was desperately looking for an apartment before college started and settled on moving in with two friends, who were a couple. Here's a breakdown I'll try to keep as unbiased as possible.\n\n* We each paid $367.\n* The girl in the couple was preggers at the time.\n* I did not physically sign the lease because I had no means of transportation at the time. I sent them the money and they signed it. \n* The lease was for August through the end of April.\n* I stayed until January. An individual apartment that I had originally wanted and applied for way before I took the apartment with my friends opened and I took they opportunity because 1) They said they were fine with it and 2) They needed room for the baby\n* During my stay, the girl had a job some of the time, I had a job the entire time, and the guy didn't have a job because he played baseball at the university.\n*Also during my stay I paid for cable/internet to be installed and paid all of the cable/internet bills. They were ~$100/month. They paid for utilities (~$50 or less/month) and did give me some food from time to time. (They had food stamps). \n* I told them when I moved out if they need help, to ask me.\n* Found out today when checking about the deposit, they claim they had to pay $400 to clean the apartment (which was already pretty spiffy, just a few carpet stains), $100 for cleaning supplies, and the guy had to sell his car to make ends meet. \n\nWhat do I do in this situation? I'm in a bind where I need my money back. I also don't want to be a dick and make them pay me back. I don't know what to do.", "summary": "Former roommates took my security deposit without telling me. I need the money, but don't want to be a dick. Some expensive claims were made."}
{"id": "t3_47qbx9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by accidentally overdosing on dextroamphetamine (ADD medication) on the day of my endwork presentation. [NSFW]", "post": "So yesterday was a rough day. I still had a LOT of work to do, things like making the actual scale model of the home design I presented today and the powerpoint presentation.\n\nI was able to make a presentable presentation, but only got 4 hours of sleep because of it. I think the lack of sleep is what caused my body to be incapable of processing my normally prescribed dosage this morning.\n\nSo today as I arrived at school I already knew I was sweating a hell of a lot more than I was supposed to. Feeling cold and sweaty is a miserable feeling. Though I assumed it was just a common cold or something. That all changed when I checked my armpits. Seriously I regret wearing a gray shirt today.\n\nMy armpits were just *drained* with sweat.\n\nI could feel the sweat drip down my arm pits drop by drop every minute, what just made more nervous. After an hour my sweater was no longer able to contain the sweat, and it was so visible I didn't even need to lift my arms for people to notice. It didn't make me feel awkward towards my friends, I just laugh it off with them.\n\nBut then it was time for me to present my design to the external jury. 7 well respected teachers and architects gave me 30 min of their time for me to defend my work.\n\nI just know that they noticed it and it distracted them and it distracted me. Too awkward for them to mention it. Too awkward for me to not ignore it. Yet I accepted the awkwardness and was able to give a somewhat terrible presentation because I got verbal ticks along with the overdose. But they loved the design at least after I explained everything twice.\n\nAfter school was done I took a piss before I went home, which was also a bad idea. It felt like passing a kidney stone and gave me a throbbing painful erection for a good 30 minutes.\n\nNow here I am, sitting at home because I can't stop sweating, feeling exhausted, heartbeat still around 100.\nI'm just having a bad day.", "summary": "Overdose, Cold and sweaty, Verbal ticks, during and after my cringe-worthy presentation. Having a bad day."}
{"id": "t3_3g95ja", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Urgent: How to best take a beating in a fist fight?", "post": "I only need/ can use advice about defending myself.  \n  \nBack story:  \nI serve in the military (not US) right now, and have lately been threatened by someone, after an unfortunate exchange of insults.  \nI am noticeably bigger than him, and none of us have practiced martial arts, other than basic melee training in the military itself.  \n  \nI tried to defuse the situation more than once.  \nI can't \"snitch\" about it, because that would create hostility between me and his friends.  \nI am near this guy 24 hours a day for the next 6 weeks.  \nI cannot go on the offense in any shape or form, otherwise I will be sent into military prison and loose a bunch of hard earned privileges.  \nMy only hope to come out clean is to take a beating and wait until a superior comes to defuse the situation, with the other guy being sent to military prison and such.", "summary": "I'm between a rock and a hard place, need to make sure I don't break anything, any advice is appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_4ey30q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17M] with my long distance girlfriend [15F] of six months, I'm leaving for two months and I want to make it easier on her", "post": "In three months I'll be leaving for Navy boot camp; in boot camp you can write letters daily, but that's effectively it for communication on the outside. Now, I'm sure we'll make it on fine through it, seeing as we're a very strong couple and the letters will make it much much more doable, but I was wondering if there's anything I could do or could send before (or after) those two weeks come, because I know it's going to be stressful on her part.\n\nWe Skype and sleep on Skype every night, always send big good morning texts to each other, and are simply very involved in each other's lives, and this is going to be a big change for her and I would really love to hear anything and everything people have to say.\n\nThank you for all the help that I may get, friends!", "summary": "I'm leaving for boot camp for two months and I want to do all that's possible to give my girlfriend an easier time while I'm away."}
{"id": "t3_4g2sto", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20'sM) think my cousin is going to tell me she (30'sF) is having a kid, I'm worried that my true feeling will show.", "post": "My cousin is very close, like a sister, we were raised together.\n\nShe announced a few months ago that she and her long-time BF (30s) wanted to have a kid despite the fact that she has for her entire life said that she never wanted kids (we both had rough childhoods).\n\nShe has invited me and my Dad over to her and her BF's place for dinner next week, despite the fact that she almost never initiates those kinds of things, and that their money is pretty tight at the moment.\n\nOther things (including the weird dinner invitation) have led me to believe that she is going to announce something big, and one of the few things I can think of are that she is pregnant.\n\nI, for various reasons, don't think her (or her BF) would make good parents. I'm not going to argue with them about it, or make a big scene, or even make mention of my feelings. It's their decision, and nothing I say or do is going to change their decision.\n\nWhat I'm worried about is hurting their feelings by not being immediately happy for them. She is kind of emotionally fragile, and uh... Histrionic?\n\nI'm not good at hiding or faking emotions like this... It really has me worried. What can I do?", "summary": "My cousin might be having a baby, I'm worried I will hurt her by not being excited when (if) she announces it."}
{"id": "t3_43d41d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] new girlfriend [21F] lied to me about using protection with other guys", "post": "I'll keep this short:\n\nI've been hooking up with this girl for half a year now, and we've only been official last month. When we were just fooling around, I told her that if she ever hooked up with other guys, I just wanted to know that she used protection.\n\nThere's this one guy in question that she said she blacked out and can't be completely sure, but she thinks she did. I trusted her and we ended up dating.\n\nNow I find out from her friend (who screenshot their text conversation) that she did NOT use protection during that night in question. She clearly wrote it to her friend.\n\nI feel like my trust was betrayed. I'm a little disgusted with this. She probably didn't want to tell me because she wanted to keep seeing me (and now we're dating), but she knows I'm serious about these things and I can't believe this happened.\n\nBeyond that, we've been pretty solid. \n\nHow should I deal with this?", "summary": "fuckbuddy turned gf had unprotected sex while we were fuckbuddies. Did not tell me this even though this was important to me. Found out through her friend."}
{"id": "t3_1gabyz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Ex-cheaters of reddit, is it honestly possible to ever rebuild trust with your SO? If so, how?", "post": "A little bit of back story.\n\n So I've been with an amazing girl for over 3 years now but back when we met I was a stupid 16 year old boy who had just started getting attention from girls. So like an idiot i fooled around behind her back with a few girls and she later found out, and by later I mean 2 years later when I finally confessed. She always had suspicions but I was never man enough to admit to it. Now the problem is that even though its been a year since she found out there is no trust in the relationship. She doesn't trust me to do literally anything. If there are any other redditors who have ever been in a similar situation, is it even possible to get past this? I'm older now and I realized that she means the world to me and I just want to move forward in our relationship but it feels pretty hopeless right now..", "summary": "16 year old dumbass me cheated on my SO,  several years later there are still trust issues, is there anything I can do?"}
{"id": "t3_lftsn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I want to join the police, specifically AFP, would joining a branch of the Australian Military help me?", "post": "As said in the title, I'm an Australian, I'm 19 almost 20, haven't got my license yet and I'm working a dead end office job. I have always wanted to join the police though they said they prefer people 21 and older with life experience, so I am sitting in this shitty job with my shitty life, and hating it, so I decided maybe joining a branch of the Australian Military would help me, would that be something they would love to see on a resume?\nIf so, where in the military should I join? Typical Army? Become a sniper? Or maybe Navy, I want something active and never boring.\nI know this isn't the most typical question, but I'm desperate, I need something new and have always considered joining the military for a back up plan but this would be something good for my resume when I go to join the police, yes?\n\nAny information would be greatly appreciated, tips, inputs and just your opinion on the matter would help.", "summary": "I want to join the police, get out of my dead end life, thinking of joining a branch of the military for something good on my resume that shows I have had a lot of experience."}
{"id": "t3_2tn9y8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my GF[24 M/F] of 2 1/2 years, broke up and I do not know how to analyze my emotions.", "post": "We were college sweethearts and we always had a solid relationship. She is the shy nervous type, but I loved that about her. After 1 year and 7 months I had to move for school, which led into a long distance relationship.\n\nThe distance really was difficult for both of us. She worked a night schedule and I worked a day schedule but we still managed to call every night. After a while, I tried to convince her to move to my side of the state. She did not really like her job that much (under payed) and I had a hard time finding a job on her side of the state (2 hours away). \n\nShe expressed a feeling of not knowing what she wanted to do with her career, leading her to not be able to commit looking for work near me. She was always really nervous with decisions and really feared drastic change. So I didn't push her, even though the distance was getting too both of us. She has to do whats best for her.\n\nSuddenly, that excuse ended up ending the relationship. She acted distant randomly as I visited her for the week (this was later in the week) and I called her out on it. She told me she doesn't know what she wants for her life and wants to be alone at this point in her life. She told me she loved me and as I left her house, I told her I hope shes finds what makes her happy and that I loved her. We were both in tears as I walked down her porch.\n\nIt has been a week since then and I am up-and-down each day. Happy,Sad,Confident, Self-loathing, miserable, ecstatic and most of all confused. I do still love her and I really don't know how to analyze what I am feeling. The breakup was out of nowhere. I just want to know that this type of things happens..because I personally don't understand it completely.", "summary": "Me and GF Broke up after two years for a reason that is hard to swallow. Why are my emotions so all over the place and does anyone have a similar story I can relate to?"}
{"id": "t3_3sc8ix", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] cannot be myself around my family, because everything I do is \"strange\".", "post": "I am a senior biochemistry major, enjoy old music - huge deadhead- and really love writing. However, my family is nothing like me. They are narrow-minded straight ticket Republican voters, none of them have ever gone to college, and they all love modern pop country music; not that I mind, I just think that says a lot about a person.\n\nNow, I could deal with those differences if they stopped there. The deeper issues are grounded in their ignorance of my intrinsic personality and their obstinacy towards simply trying to understand. I was diagnosed with Major Depression Disorder with psychotic features in high school and then Bipolar 1 later on. On many days, all I can do is lie in the dark and list reasons to continue living.\n\nThis frequent inability to do anything is viewed as lazy by my family, and the way they berate me makes it so much worse. However, I have a 3.8 GPA and have been accepted into a few PhD programs for neurobiology. I have had steady jobs with good pay, but they refuse to believe that I can make it on my own.\n\nI have stayed with friends on multiple occasions, and the depression seems to subside, or at least lessen immensely, almost the instant I am out of the disapproving gaze of my parents. During these times, I feel like a completely different person, like being drunk without drinking, thought patterns change and even the air is lighter. Yet, when I come back home still stimulated with the residual joy of temporary freedom, there must be something wrong with me, and they interrogate the individuality out of me.\n\nI really just want to leave and try to live a happy life, but I feel like a human whom Pavlov experimented on. How do I get out of this mindset and become the person I want to be?", "summary": "Parents treat me like a child and refuse to let me fulfill the potential that I think I have. How do I approach the issue in a way that won't incite an argument?"}
{"id": "t3_1iiebc", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I think I have some form of PTSD?", "post": "I'm not sure if that's what it is. Sorry if that's offensive to call it that when it's probably something else. \n\nJuly of last year, my friend was texting me constantly on her roadtrip. Her friend rolled their car and my friend was rushed to the hospital and went into a coma for a few weeks. She ended up being ok but I originally thought she was ignoring me or lost service. In September, I was texting a friend of mine when she fell asleep and died in a house fire. I didn't know about the fire until a few days later, I kept texting her thinking she was ignoring me. Two months ago, I had text my friend in the morning and he agreed to meet me at my house later that afternoon to hang out. When he didn't show up, I kept texting him and calling him. I thought he was ignoring me, turns out he had killed himself a few hours before. \n\nNow whenever I'm texting someone and they don't reply within a few hours I freak out. I panic, start crying, call them, call someone who might know if they are still alive/ok. Basically full blow panic attacks. It's really embarrassing when they tell me to stop freaking out they just fell asleep/lost their phone/were riding unicorns. Should I talk to someone about this? Just get over myself?", "summary": "People have stopped texting me in the past because they are dead or in comas. Now if someone doesn't reply quickly I have panic attacks. What do I do."}
{"id": "t3_2hdos6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26/F] with my boyfriend [28 M] 2 years;Will he propose on vacation?/Why won't people stop asking me that?", "post": "BF and I are headed on a two week vacation to Europe, leaving Friday. We have lived together for six months, been together two years, and many of our friends are now married or engaged. \n\nGetting engaged on vacation seems to be en vogue these days. So now, I've had multiple friends, and most recently my father(!) as me if we're getting engaged on this trip. \n\nThis is terrible for a number of reasons. \n\n1) Thanks friends for putting that thought in my mind!! \n2) How do I know? \n\nAnyway, I am ready to be engaged. He is my one. We've discussed everything from parenting styles to wedding seating (if you have aunts Sandy, Irene, Rita and Katrina, you HAVE to have a hurricane table, right??). \n\nHe is financially comfortable, we are both at stable places in our lives, and we are very happy. So is he going to do it? \n\nBut I also don't know if he is ready, and that is fine with me! I would very enthusiastically say yes if he asked, but I wouldn't want to actually tie the knot until at least 2016. \n\nThe problem:...these people have put the thought in my head! Now I'm afraid I'll ruin my vacation by expecting something at every romantic moment. How do I deal with this? How do I brush it off and just enjoy my vacation?", "summary": "I wasn't thinking about getting engaged on vacation until everyone started asking me about it. How do I not let that planted seed ruin my enjoyment of vacation?"}
{"id": "t3_3wdu29", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Hearing Issues...", "post": "Hello!\n\nI am a 28 year old male that has had ongoing issues hearing people talking, on tv and directly to me.  I hear other noises, but talking is somewhat difficult, especially if there is any other noise going on at the same time.\n\ni.e., I'm listening to music on my computer, next to a window that is very minimally open.  I'm about 50 or more feet away from the cars driving past, but when they do, my music goes into a muffled sound and I can't make out the words being sung.\n\nAdditionally, talking to people, I'm constantly being asked to repeat myself.  I'm also been told to turn the TV down pretty often.\n\nI'm not on any medication that would be causing these issues.", "summary": "I have a hard time hearing people talking to me in person or on the TV.  I hear other types of noises mostly uninhibited. When there is noise and someone talking, I hear the noise and the talking goes muffled."}
{"id": "t3_2hmujq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F22] just started dating my friend [M23] and I'm uncomfortable by his attitude towards his female friends/other women.", "post": "So my friend and I recently decided to start dating. We had a casual, non-exclusive relationship for a few weeks, and last night I told him I wanted to be exclusive.\n\nThe thing is, he talks a lot about how attracted he is to other women. He told me pretty much any time a woman is wearing X or Y, regardless of who she is, he'll be horny. He keeps a lot of female friends on Facebook simply so he can look at their pictures (and I guess masturbate to them, I dunno, based on what he's told me before). He still talks to his ex's. \n\nAnd last night, after I had said I wanted to be exclusive and we were talking about something else, he said something along the lines of, \"The physical half of my would fuck anyone who would fuck me. I'd fuck a pile of dirt if it felt good.\"\n\nAm I weird for being upset by this? I understand being attracted to other people is part of life, and that doesn't bother me. I don't mind him watching porn or anything like that. It's the attitude of being willing to fuck pretty much anything that moves, having sexual feelings towards his female friends\u2026 I guess it's more personal than I'm comfortable with.\n\nIt just made me feel really shitty. Is this normal? Am I supposed to be okay with this stuff? I don't think he'd cheat on me, but I guess it makes me feel like sex with him is nothing special, and I don't like that feeling in a relationship. All of this just came to light last night after I told him I wanted to be exclusive. If I had known this stuff beforehand, I'm not sure I would've jumped into it.", "summary": "Recently started seeing a guy and I'm uncomfortable with the way he feels towards his female friends/other women. Not sure if I'm being dramatic or if I have a legitimate reason to be upset."}
{"id": "t3_1qxz7x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my ___ [20 M] 1 year 8 months, broke up three months ago, I can't get over it.", "post": "I asked my now ex-boyfriend for a break while he was backpacking for a month after having been abroad for two months. I felt neglected and powerless. The relationship seemed entirely one-sided. I needed time to think if he was what I really wanted. We didn't talk for six weeks. When we finally talked, he was not interested in addressing the core issue. He implied that he didn't love me as much as I loved him. I can't seem to get over how much that hurt. \n\nI keep waking up, three months later, forgetting that we've broken up. Then I realize and get emotional. I know that he is what I want. I've known it for a while, I told him and he wanted nothing to do with me. I just feel like a terrible person for everything that happened. I hate myself. I just want him to be happy but I can't seem to move on. I really need help. I have a previous issue with self-mutilation (but I haven't cut in four years).\nAny advice for moving on with my life?", "summary": "Broke up with boyfriend because I felt neglected, now I regret it and he doesn't love me. I can't get over it. I need help."}
{"id": "t3_53c8qp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] with my GF [21F] 10 months distance relationship, need your point of view of this breakup", "post": "Hey. I and my GF have been together for around 1 months. The probem is the distance between us, and we will have the distance between us for another 10-15 months(minimum) so it is really hard and annoying. The problems I am facing is, she is so deep in love with me, it hurts to see her in pain because of the distance, I have a lot of problems at home right now so can't really visit her or vice versa, but we tak around once a week now. We used to talk around 5-10 times a week before, but it is not possible due to my problems at home. She has asked for a pause before because she was have been in pain for so long, I said that we will fix it. Time has passed since then, and I have realised that my problems at might be for another 3 months at least. My thought was to break u, so she can be free from the pain I have caused, but when I talked with her about it I realised that she will be in more pain if I break up. But somewhere deep inside me I know it will be better to let her go, she might be in deeper pain for a month or so, but it will slowly get better. Instead of being with me in pain everyday, until we can move in together. \nI would really like to have your advice and point of view, am I thinking like an idiot? Am I thinking right? Do you have tips to solve this problem even better than a break up?", "summary": "Long distance relationship - Should I break up with her? Can't see each other often due to problems at home, trying my best to solve this in the best way possible. I want peoples thoughts on this problem!"}
{"id": "t3_3ji3zr", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Utility Payments that aren't really mine", "post": "Good Morning/Afternoon r/advice, \n\nNever posted on Reddit before at all, but I figured (based on the overall reliability of you nice individuals) that now would be a good time to start. \n\nAbout a year ago I moved away from my Midwest town to the west coast for work, and have just recently moved back. I was calling the Utility providers in my area to set up the gas/water/elec for my new place, but I was informed that gas could not be set up due to owing a past amount. \n\nI am generally good about keeping up on those things, but am only human so I assumed I would have a small sum to pay. Maybe one months worth that I missed at the end of a lease or something like that. I was alarmed however when  I was told that the value was around $500.00 from a home that I shared with friends in college. They stated that this amount was accrued in 2013.\n\nI have spent the last 3 days trying to find the exact time when we moved from that specific house ( it was college, so we had a new place basically every year) and just now found out that the lease was over on 05/31/2012. Basically, whoever took over residency didn't change the service into their name and I did not request cancellation (first house, never had to pay utilities in the previously \"managed\" apartments as they were included in rent, other excuses). \n\nMy question is, am I really on the hook for these fees and what recourse could I possibly have? I cannot afford to pay it, but I also don't think that it should be on me TO pay it. Any advice is truly appreciated as I have not had any experience with this type of thing before.", "summary": "Didn't cancel gas from a house in college. People lived there afterwards using gas in my name. I \"owe\"$500.00 but can validate that I did not live there at that time."}
{"id": "t3_17x2sr", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Any hope for the elusive lesbian man? (20 M/MtF)", "post": "For most of my life I was pretty hopeless about dating, mostly because I could not be myself when with women; I put on a man act because I was afraid of losing their interest.\n\nI thought I was gay, but the only thing I'm missing is an enjoyment for sex with men.  I've tried it many times and couldn't stay hard.  I was resigned to being a foreveralone with no hope and I was pretty hopeless about life.\n\nI used to joke to myself about being a lesbian in a man's body, but it turns out that's not far from the truth.  I'm going to be transitioning and living as a female in the next 6-12 months with the help of hormones and a lot of work, but I feel like I am unable to form meaningful relationships with women in the mean time.\n\nI don't find straight women that appealing because they prefer, and expect, masculinity from me and assume the submissive role that I would normally take in a relationship.  But while dating a lesbian girl who assumes the dominant role would be perfect, they don't find me attractive now and may lesbians seem to have a militant aversion to trans women.\n\nIt seems that either I somehow must act masculine and have women attracted to me (hasn't worked, would rather play in traffic) or I be myself and no one will want me for at least another 1-2 years when I presumably pass as a woman at some level.  How can I make female friends and possibly more than friends in the mean time?", "summary": "I am the woman in the relationship but I am presenting as a male.  Will any straight women find my personality attractive?  Is my only hope lesbian-leaning bisexual girls?  Any advice for making it work?"}
{"id": "t3_3mgwmw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 26M I haven't met anyone else after my live-in ex two years ago", "post": "She was my first serious long term partner and eventually cheated on me.  Our breakup was shitty, and we didn't really remain friends.\n\nIt took a while to \"get over it\" but since then I knew I was ready and open to date someone new.  I really wanted to be in love again and find someone I could share my life with. But in the two years I've been single: I just haven't. \n\nIt sucks, because I see tons of attractive women, I meet lots of interesting people, and I know rationally there are a lot of people out there that would make good matches.  So it doesn't make any sense to me why I haven't been able to meet anyone that I've felt romantic about in longer than I can remember.\n\nAt this point I feel like I've kind of resigned myself against the possibility of meeting anyone anytime soon.  I've had FWB's, dated a few people for a while, but just haven't dated anyone that I've felt a romantic connection with.\n\nFor the past year, I tried to just not put any pressure on it and just let it happen.  But at the same time, it seems like it's starting to feel like it's been a long time, and at this point I'd really like to love someone.\n\nAnyway, at my current trajectory, I could easily see myself going down this path for the next five or ten years.  I'm not really sure what to do.  I lift weights and am in pretty good shape, but I don't really seem to attract the kind of people I'm attracted to (so basically, attractive women, making me like every other dude).\n\nAnyway, I thought about this because recently my ex friended me on facebook and, while it wasn't a serious thing (she's had a new bf for a while now), I wrote her last week just to catch up and she immediately unfriended me and never replied.  I kind of sat there thinking like \"man.  My love life is such shit.  All I have after the last two years is the hope of friendship with a woman who wants nothing to do with me, and I still can't find anyone I'm attracted to to date.\"", "summary": "Feeling down because I just haven't met anyone I've been romantically interested in since my ex girlfriend. Not hung up on her, just feeling down that it's been (what feels like) a very long time."}
{"id": "t3_51hphl", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by renting my apartment to the weedman", "post": "Last week I rented 1 out of 2 rooms to my weedman and his girlfriend. It was only supposed to be till the end of September. \n\nSunday noon this guys calls me and tells me \n\"Hey man, my girlfriend left me. I'm not going to stay at apartment anymore, I want my money back!\"\n\nI don't really have backup funds for emergency situations like this due to the fact that I just started working as an apprentice one year ago. My mother pays for the apartment.\n\nNow here is where the fuck up happened. He payed me around 500\u20ac for one month. The rent was already payed and I decided to spent the money on clothes, electronics, booze and of course some herbs. And I also didn't tell my mother about. \n\nThis dude has the key for the main lock to the apartment. Unfortunately this is a universal key. He can open the door to the building, to my mail and the door. Fortunately I didn't give the key for the second lock. \n\nAfter trying to tell him that I don't have his money, he went berserk. He threatened me via text and phone calls. \n\nI panicked. Closed both locks. Went to my parents house, because I didn't really felt safe there anymore. My parents are out of town till the end of September and I beg to God that I can sort this situation out. \n\nMy mother will probably kill me if she finds out, the dealer most likely too. Drugs are bad mkay kids?", "summary": "rent a room to a dealer, he wanted the money back. Got threats via text and phone calls.  Dealer still has one out of two keys to the apartment. "}
{"id": "t3_2dgg1s", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by standing up to the school jerk.", "post": "I am a college student in a very small Institute. (Graduation class of less than 50) Well there is this particular guy who is the biggest jerk of the school. He has to \"one up\" everybody and is constantly demeaning and disrespectful. \n\nWell, this particular discussion began over the recent tragedy involving Robin Williams death.\n\nHe had mentioned the incident and said that those who take their own lives are \"Shameless Cowards\" and those people shouldn't waste time on Earth if they can't handle life. Also the families and loved ones of those individuals should be ashamed and embarrassed.\n\nI then was very upset and told him that I have had people very close to me take their own lives, and You can imagine what that person must have been dealing with. He proceeded to say they were simply weak. At this point I went off and can't remember everything that was said. Well a nosey student went and told a director that I was Verbally assaulting an innocent student. (of course) this student was an underclassmen who did not know the situation nor the history of this person. They also lied and exaggerated the story.\n\nI was called into a meeting where I was suspended for the next 3 days. Upon my return on Monday I have a meeting with the program Director to discuss further repercussions, aka Expulsion from a College I have paid to go to. \n\nThis college is a joke. The teachers act like high school students and gossip like no teenage I've ever met. the favoritism and exaggeration is outrageous. I am being threatened with expulsion on the false grounds of bulling with no proof of the entire incident and the guy that was involved didn't even come forward to complain about it because it was simply a heated discussion in which were both involved.\n\nI guess the lesson here is, You can't stand up to Bullies because you look like a bully and then are kicked from a bullshit college that you have paid $30,000 to attend.", "summary": "I stood up to a bully, now I'm being falsely accused of being a Bully and I am facing Expulsion from college. (because this is high school, right?)"}
{"id": "t3_1msaqv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[19M] with my Girlfriend [19F] of 3 years, She is unsure if our relationship is worth saving - Help", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nme and my girlfriend had been together for about 1 year when i started to ignore her problems and be a bit selfish, denying that we had problems and letting my own insecurities out on our relationship.\nThis carried on for another year and she put up with it.\n\nat the moment we currently aren't together and she kind of likes another guy, goes out with him and hang around together, she says that she still loves me and wants me to show her that we're worth saving but i really don't know what to do.\n(I'm quite emotionally naive with these kind of things)\n\nAt the moment i really don't know what i should do, if i should fight for our relationship and show her that we're worth saving, or just move on with my life without her.\nI'm pretty much at rock bottom at the moment\n\nShe is literally my whole world and has been for the past 3 years\n\nPlease help Reddit", "summary": "girlfriend is having doubts over relationship because i was a massive cunt to her for too long and she found someone else to fill the gap i made"}
{"id": "t3_4cff5a", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Does debit card insufficient funds fee affect my credit in any way?", "post": "First time posting on Reddit and on mobile, formatting might be a problem.\nYesterday, I checked my bank account online after my card was not accepted for a payment. Turns out I have a balance of -$60 on my debit card because of a purchase done on a subscription I didn't even know I had subscribed to. I only had 0.23\u00a2 (irresponsible, I know) on my bank account, and the subscription costed $12. So apart from the $12 fee, I got an overdraft fee of -$34, and another more for -$15 after not paying the first fee a week after I got it. So now I have a $60 fee, and I have no idea if it will affect my credit or my debit in any way. I do not have a credit card, I have never had any, and I plan to pay the debt today. Will this fee affect me and my credit in any way?", "summary": "$60 overdraft fee, no idea how it will affect my debit, bank account, and credit, even though I have never owned a credit card."}
{"id": "t3_4h857r", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Can I legally shut down someone's social media accounts if it is giving me a bad rep?", "post": "My first and last name is pretty unique. I only get about ~500 page results when I Google my name. Recently, some idiot who apparently has the same full name as me (i have no idea who he is) opened up twitter and facebook accounts under his name so that when I search for my name on Google, the first page contains links to all of his accounts, which have the same name as me. Now, I usually would have no problem with this. The problem that I have is that (1) all of his posts talk about him doing drugs, smoking weed, drinking, partying (2) he has pornography all over his social media accounts (3) several pornographic websites of his account appear. (4) he says a lot of racist stuff that I don't agree with (5) and every other word is a curse word. I'm completely the opposite of this, and this obviously does not give me a good name considering that I'm in my second year of university and am starting to look for jobs soon. I'm worried employers would see it and automatically reject me.  Can I sue him for defamation? I've tried reporting the accounts, but I failed because twitter and facebook say that  I do not have rights to take down his account. Is there anything that I can do?", "summary": "Guy posts stupid stuff on social media accounts, which pop up in my name's search results and give me a bad rep. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_29ller", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20F) was a horrible person in a relationship because of my past", "post": "My boyfriend (19M)  broke up with me (20F), after an 8 month relationship, a little over a month ago. The break up was bad. I was hysterical and acted like a child. At first I did not know why he had broken up with me (his answers to my questions were not very clear). \n\nAfter a while, and a little soul searching, I realized that out relationship fell apart because of my need to be in control. I was constantly nagging him to do things and I constantly micro-managed not only my life, but also his. \n\nI have been going to counseling ever since the break up. It has made me realize that my behavior comes from a controlling parent. I do not want to be controlling and am working on living life without worry about something not going right. So far, I am actually enjoying my life more than I have in a very long time.\n\nI had not thought about my ex for quite a while. About a week after the break up I decided that it was time for me to pull my life back together. Now that I am feeling much better, I have started thinking about him again. I would like to try again in a relationship with him. I am sure he is angry and hurt by the way I treated him. I do not want to have the same relationship we had because if it did not work once, it is not going to work again. I could go give him  the whole \"I've changed\" speech, but I feel like I need to say something different than that. I do not know what to do to try and win him back, and let him know I actually want to have a good, healthy relationship.", "summary": "I was controlling because of my parent to one of the best people I've ever met. After some therapy and working on changing, I think I want to try again with him, but I don't know how to approach it."}
{"id": "t3_222fr0", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Invited to go out, but I have major anxiety...", "post": "My friends finally decided to invite me out for a night out, I usually hang out with this group but the only thing is that they're all planning to sleep over at someones house who I'm not to familiar with. They're all close to these people living in the house, but I would feel extremely uncomfortable staying there. I'm not even sure if he's okay with it, my friends just told me that they were going too.\nI don't have anywhere else to stay because we're going to a different city (college campus), I want to go out with them, but I'm not sure. I'm hyperventilating just thinking about it...", "summary": "Just wondering if it's weird for me to sleepover at someones house whom I barely know, not sure if I even want to go now..."}
{"id": "t3_54bjtz", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "I've lost weight, but I want to tone up and start eating healthy. Before after pics included.", "post": "I went from 195 to around 150. \n\nBACKGROUND: I very recently started working out, but dieting is where I fail. I eat real bad, yesterday for example I had 2 bags of chips, 15ish Hershey kisses, an ice cream sandwich, pizza, and fried chicken. That was a pretty average day,  I've done 2 pints of ice cream no problem, but now I'm trying to slow down on my sugar intake. I don't calorie count. \n\nEating right seems to focus on creating healthy yet delicious meals. But that's not me, the tastiness doesn't outweigh the time spent making. I just want to get what I need. Hence why I eat so much fast food and junk. Need x amount of carbs? Drink this it takes no time prepping. Need x amount of protein? Take this pill and you're good for the day. Don't get me wrong I'm not trying to take shortcuts, I just don't care for food and the more time needed to make a meal the less likely I'll do it.", "summary": "Daily vitamins, minerals, nutrients without meals? I mean dam if anything I'll even blend a chicken into a shitty shake if that only takes 1 min."}
{"id": "t3_w4zi7", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Friend put me down as a personal reference for a car loan. What should I do?", "post": "Someone I hang out with but that I don't know very well put me down as a personal reference for a car loan, and the dealership (a national chain known for financing people with bad credit) called and left me a voicemail to call them back. I have never had to put down a personal reference for a car loan, and I don't know why they are calling me. What type of information are they looking for? (I am definitely NOT cosigning or anything like that; this was out of the blue.)\n\nFor the record, I don't know this friend very well. He tells a lot of tall tales about his family and claims to own a luxury car and a house \"back home\" in another city but seems to be just barely scraping by here. He also recently started his own business, but I have no idea how well it may or may not be doing financially.\n\nSo I guess if I called the car dealership back, I wouldn't have anything good to say about his financial situation. To me, it seems like he has no money, but I don't want to tank his chance at getting a car. Should I call back and lie, call back and tell the truth, or just not call back at all?", "summary": "What info is involved in personal references for car loans? Should I give a reference for someone I don't know very well?"}
{"id": "t3_z2l2d", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "He doesn't trust me because he's cheating on me. Duh.", "post": "Seriously, I'm an idiot for getting myself into this.\n\nWhen I fall in love I just automatically give the person the benefit of the doubt, and my trust. Y'know, I thought if you love someone then that automatically means you should be able to trust them. If he tells me he doesn't trust me because he's scared, I'd just believe that shit without a second thought.\u00a0\n\nAm I really that much of an idiot to just believe that? This guy is totally fucking around, I can't believe I'd be stupid enough to believe otherwise just because of love and just because *I'm* faithful. Stupid, stupid, stupid.\n\nBut now, I'm just going to numb myself out. I'm really good at that. I'm going to constantly assume the worst. I'm going to allow myself to keep falling in love with him (because honestly I couldn't stop myself if I tried) and I'm going to stay just as faithful as I've been this entire time, *but I'm not trusting him for shit*. Fuck that.\n\nI already know what's coming. I've probably been getting played since the beginning, and I'm definitely being played now. I'd be a fucking idiot to think this guy actually loves me.\u00a0\n\nI mean really, why did I think I was special? What made me think I was so special that he would want to be with me exclusively? I only believed it because that's what I wanted, but what the fuck? Could I be a bigger fucking idiot? Damn.\n\nI'm just going to enjoy it while it lasts. Sooner or later it'll get more obvious that I'm being used and I'll be discarded, or the betraying will become apparent. Whatever comes first. So at least for now I can love him without being fully aware of how I'm being fucked.\n\nIt'll actually be cool to get my heart broken because then I can really numb out. Any faith I have in people would be sucked out and replaced with cold detachment. I'll shut people out of my heart in the name of defense. If I don't trust anyone to begin with, then they would have no chance to fuck me over. Awesome.", "summary": "Just because I'm \u00a0in love and faithful doesn't mean I'm getting the same respect in return. Fuck trust and fuck being gullible. I'm being betrayed."}
{"id": "t3_3du1qg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] my long term boyfriend [30 M) of 2 years lied about using dating sites.", "post": "I recently discovered my boyfriend of over 2 years has been logging onto a dating site daily. We had spoken before about this account a few months into our relationship and agreed that as long as it wasnt being used there was no reason to deactivate it. \n\nA year later i logged into mine to  look at a friends potential date, and saw he was online. I went back the next day and there he was again. Over the next few weeks i checked in daily and he was online up to 3 times a day. I mentioned I saw him on there and he lied to me, saying it was once off answering a friend. He got angry that I brought it up and accused me of being paranoid and untrusting, and that he would have to shut it down because of my issues and i securities.\n I havent told him yet that I know he lied, Im trying to come to terms with his response and not blow up. I genuinly dont believe he is cheating on me, but the fact he is browsing other women, and choosing to lie to me and put me down instead of admit it is a huge red flag, and not in line with the love he claims to have for me. I feel disrespected and upset that my relationship is not based on honesty like I thought. I have just left a job to move across the country to be with him, and now Im unsure about my decision. He knows honesty is non negotiable with me, this has seriously damaged my idea of our relationship.\nAny advise or insights?\n*Ive never been insecure or untrusting in relationships. Wondering If Im picking up on something this time round?", "summary": "long term boyfriend on dating site daily and lying about it. Dont think hes cheating but world rocked by his lying, now questioning our relationship."}
{"id": "t3_50exk4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M24] have been dating F[20] over summer and don't want to continue seeing her romantically. She is very attached to me. How can I let her down easy?", "post": "I've been seeing a girl over the summer. Shes really sweet but has been giving hints she wants to make our relationship official.  I've given it some thought and I decided I don't want to take it to that level with her.  Like I said, she is really nice, but we're in different places in life and I just have a gut feeling that I don't want to take it any further.  She has gotten really attached to me though and I know this is going to crush her.  She also lost one of her parents recently which makes the whole situation worse.  I've been in a shitty place too so we've been really helping each other emotionally.  So some part of me really doesn't want to do this since I'll be more emotionally isolated, as well as her.  I would love to keep things casual, but I don't think that would be healthy for her since I'm afraid she would say yes with the hope I would change my mind.\n\nHow can I let her down easy, or as much as possible given the situation?  Is it possible for us to still be there for each other after the dust settles?", "summary": "How can I gently tell a girl I've been dating, that is very attached to me, that I don't want to be her boyfriend?"}
{"id": "t3_t0s7b", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, need help against my Catholic ex-roommate", "post": "Reddit,\nI moved in with a good friend of mine in November of last year. Before moving in with me he knew I was gay. However in February he told me that he became very religious (joined Knights of Columbus) and could no longer live with me. He asked me to 'control myself' until November at lease end or he would have to move out. \n\nI never had anyone over while he was at the residence and you would never know I was gay unless I told you. This all started because I had a straight friend over and the entire time he 'freaked out' thinking of what I might be doing with him. I was so furious at the time I told him to just move out.\n\nHe moved out, I could not find another roommate so we were forced to give notice to the leasing office we would be leaving. He continued to pay bills, rent, etc. \n\nHere is my problem, there is a $1000 dollar cancellation fee, he is to pay half and I have to pay half. I think it's ridiculous though because he is the one that broke the lease contract on his own accord based on his views, I did not want too. My attorney says the same and says the state will agree with me in small claims court. He sent my roommate a letter stating that he must pay or we will pursue civil law suit action. However no results. \n\nMy attorney is suggesting I send him a letter basically saying 'If you are a true Catholic as you say then you will pay him the money because it's the right thing to do. He suggested I quote some excerpts from the bible. I'm not religious so I'm not too versed on what excerpts I could pull out. \n\nI would appreciated any help you guys could give me!", "summary": "good friend who was my roommate and knew I was gay moved out because I'm gay, need help with leasing contract."}
{"id": "t3_syb3v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I've been asked to take part in a TV show about drugs, on drugs, would you do it?", "post": "A well known TV channel has approached me and asked me to be on a special debate show about drugs. They say that it's looking into the therapeutic value of a certain drugs and there will be lots of experts on the show who support legalisation of said drug. \n\nThe producers claim to want to get the opinions from \"The Street\" and say that we'll be given enough time (in an interview with a news-man) to put our own views on the subject across. Everyone in my country takes or has taken this drug and the fact it's illegal when the real social damager alcohol is still available seems pig headed by our government. \n\nI currently run my own business, so answer to no boss. However, although I initially agreed to be in the show I'm now starting to think that I might be misrepresented or that I might regret the whole thing in later life.\n\nOn the plus side, I'd like to be the person who says \"The Emperor's wearing no clothes!\" and stand up and make a statement for the people of my society, who I know think pretty much the same as I do. \n\nSo would you do it?", "summary": "asked to be on TV show about drugs, on drugs - can't work out if to do it or not, so asking if you would and your opinons..."}
{"id": "t3_2p63xv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [M 15] GF [F 15] My girlfriend of three weeks doesn't know what she wants", "post": "She tried to break up with me yesterday. She said it was because we act too much like friends and that it looks like I don't care about our relationship because it looks like I don't like her. I called her and told her I really liked her and didn't want to lose her and promised we'll start being a couple. She said she believed me and that she wanted to hang out with me. When we hung out I asked her if she still liked me and she said yes but when I asked her about why she tried to break up with me, she said she didn't know. I asked her if she really wanted to act like a couple, she said that she didn't care (wtf). I asked her straight up what she wanted and she said that she didn't know what either. What do? Nonetheless we had a great time hanging out.", "summary": "Almost broke up with my GF for reasons. Says now she doesn't care about those reasons and she doesn't know what she wants."}
{"id": "t3_uqvym", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's the most awkward/shitty experience you've ever had with a group of friends?", "post": "One time I called my friend to see if he wanted to grab some lunch and we talked on the phone a bit and he said sure so he told me to meet him at subway, but wait because he was going to take a shower. So I waited and waited and eventually an hour went by and I never heard from my friend. I called my friend numerous times to see if he was out, but he never picked up so I decided to go to subway alone to pick something up. As I get to subway, I walk in and see my group of friends sitting there (Including the one I called) and he just says \"Oh mannnn\" he stands up gives me a hug and says \"Sorry\". I ordered my food and left being that it was really awkward.", "summary": "I was supposed to go to lunch with my friend who ignored me and saw him there with my other friends as I was uninvited"}
{"id": "t3_4f68zb", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Mom was hurt at work, I think it's something that is a little past worker's comp. Any advice?", "post": "My mom works at an old navy for something upwards of almost ten years. Over the span of her working their they have been lingering in and out of being abusive employers. Not that this isn't something I wouldn't expect out of a big corporation, something happened recently that I'm close to positive should be lawsuit worthy or something in my mom's favor. \n\nThe other day on the clock my mom was cleaning one of the bathrooms and while taking the garbage out there was a faced up syringe under some paper towels! She found out after jabbing her hand with the syringe and noticed that there was preexisting blood on this syringe!!! She was then brought to the hospital (obviously) to be screened for all sorts of diseases and had the option of starting intense medications to prevent the microscopic chance of that needle being contaminated with HIV though the medications would make her very ill. All old navy did about the situation was lock the bathrooms so the public can't use them.\n\nIs there anything about this situation that my mom can use in her favor? She didn't turn the syringe over to Old Navy because they were being very nonchalant and dismissive about the situation.", "summary": "mom was cleaning a bathroom at work and got jabbed by a hidden bloody syringe in the garbage. Is there anything we can do? Also location is in NY"}
{"id": "t3_jtdtm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear Reddit: Have you ever HAD to be an asshole for a moral/ good cause?", "post": "I'll start, but I'm sure there are better stories out there.\n\nI recently dated a girl, who I had high hopes for; she was quite interesting, sensual and fun. Unfortunately, she had a past/baggage that really affected her on a daily basis. In terms of social behaviour, she just wouldn't have fit in with my family or friends... In addition our long term goals were not the same. Problem was, I liked her a bunch and it was hard to come to grips and tell her how I really felt. In the end, I told her everything and was probably too straight forward, and really hurt her feelings... But I knew it had to be that way or it wouldn't be \"final\"... Anyways it worked, was called a real asshole. I don't regret it, thinking it was better off this way, but still made me feel like crap.\n\nAnyways probably more amusing stories out there than this sappy one. Let's hear it!", "summary": "liked a girl but recognized it wouldn't work out in the long run. Turned her down for moral reasons and was branded an asshole."}
{"id": "t3_54caux", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 F] with my boyfriend [32 M] 7mo, finding more details after the affair; do I confront or let stand?", "post": "Found out about emotional affair with ex.  Details in previous question.  He cut her off, we moved forward together.  Two months in, I found out he wasn't completely honest about how deeply this thing ran.  It's a lot of the same issues, but upon rereading what I found, I found that he was way more involved than he let on, and was leading her to believe that I was the one being unreasonable and jealous, while telling me negative things about her.   It escalated during a rough patch between us.\n\nWe talked about all those things already though.  I confronted him about that, and about everything else.  We moved forward, but this still opens an old wound and makes me question everything.  Had I known, I might have left.  I'm wondering if I should leave now.", "summary": "After working through the aftermath of an emotional affair with the ex, I found more details about what went on.  Should I address it or leave it alone and keep moving forward?"}
{"id": "t3_3dqzmh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend (29F) of three years and I (28M) broke up recently. I'm a weird guy in a weird situation now.", "post": "She really, really loved me. At 28, I've never had anything close to \"love\" or even infatuation for anyone, really.\n\nI'd tried to break up with her a couple times in the past for her own good, but could never really get it to stick. It's hard to choose to hurt someone AND render yourself bored/alone and I wasn't strong enough. She finally realized recently that I really DIDN'T want to live with her or get married and all that, and we decided to split fairly amicably.\n\nI'm really, really unbelievably bored now but I'm pretty sure I'd just put any future person in the same shitty position. Even now, there's a girl who seems interested in me and I have exactly the same lukewarm feeling about the whole thing as I did last time (or any other time in the past).  I'm tired of feeling like I'm screwing up the lives of the people who care the most about me.\n\nI find it doubtful that some magical \"right person\" is going to come along and change all this and really have no idea what to do at this point.", "summary": "Am I doomed to a life of forever-alone boredom because I feel so little in a romantic sense? I'm really confused."}
{"id": "t3_x6hmi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my family is at our wits end over an issue with my apartment complex. What can I do to make everything right?", "post": "We found out a couple weeks ago that our home has bed bugs, living in the master bedroom. We have had no issues before living here, and we have been here a while. After looking up some information, we saw other residents are experiencing this pest problem as well. \n\nWe reported the problem to the complex very early on. They had a guy come out and spray for 15 minutes, when they told us he would be there for 2 hours. To prepare, they essentially made us back up our entire home and flip all the furniture,  which took a full day of our schedule. A couple days later we had no follow up from them, so I called and explained again. They said another spray has to be done, and then professional carpet cleaners will come. I'm thinking, awesome it should be fixed! \n\nSkip to today. The cleaners came, and now the problem is worse than ever. Their solution is to keep coming in and spraying for less than 15 minutes. \n\nOur bed is ruined. Our couches are ruined. We have a 5 month old child who cannot be around when they spray for a full day. And we do not have the money to buy all new furniture at this point. \n\nWhat can I do to get my life back to normal and pest free?", "summary": "Apartments are huge slackers and their pest problems have ruined my personal property, how can I get them to make this right?"}
{"id": "t3_482h5n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] am having crushing anxiety and guilt about if I should break up with boyfriend", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend for over three years. Last week, it hit me almost overnight that I had to end things. I don't want to, but I feel like I have to. All day last Sunday my boyfriend was annoying me. He wasn't doing anything wrong, just everything he did annoyed me. When I got home it hit me that I didn't feel the same way and I literally had a panic attack. All week I have had awful anxiety about it. I can't shake this feeling that I've falle out of love with him. I don't think it is his fault, he has been fine. He doesn't abuse me or disrespect me. I think I've just come to realize that I can't make myself feel the same way about him as I used to. \n\nLast night when we had sex, I felt like I was having sex with a stranger. I just wanted it to be over. I feel crazy because three weeks ago I was so happy with him and was so in love, and now I have these thoughts and I don't know if it is a lapse in judgment, or if love can change and fade so quickly. The thought of ending it makes me cry and cry, leaves my heart feeling like it is on fire. Like I'm a failure for being with someone three years with nothing to show for it. I can't stop thinking about the thought of him with someone else, or the thought of him no longer in my life and it is so incredibly upsetting. I feel like I am in this limbo. Like I love him, but not enough to marry him or spend my life with him. \n\nOn Valentine's Day we went to a hockey game and all day he was so nice, so loving. But I just kept thinking to myself that this wasn't right. Like yes he loves me, but I don't feel as in love with him as he does with me. \n\nHas anybody else felt like this? Did I fall out of love, or am I just out of the honeymoon stage? After my panic attack last week I went to the doctor and got on lexapro, and I just keep trying to tell myself that I'm depressed and that it isn't my boyfriend but I don't know.", "summary": "don't know if I should end things. Terrible anxiety and sadness maybe meaning I shouldn't or that I should???"}
{"id": "t3_cpjq2", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is it offensive, when given signs, to not make a move or show interest?", "post": "There was this babe who apparently is into *BATTLESTAR GALACTICA* and *FIREFLY* in my lab class this past semester who kept giving me the looks and body language that she was probably interested. We never actually spoke, because in that class I actually enjoyed the material, and was working with all the dudes on the opposite side of the room; my persona was pretty alpha because all the guys liked me and sort of looked up to me (this isn't normal), they listened when I spoke, I helped them with their work since the subject is kind of my thing, laughed at my jokes, etc.   \n  \n  \nThe class only met a total of 7-8 times, some of them she didn't show up so even fewer opportunities, but between the work, exams, scheduling, and most of all me bitching out, we never spoke to each other. It took a couple of weeks but eventually I started to forcefully forget about her.   \n  \nI'm taking a summer course now, and a couple of weeks ago I saw her in the hallway, we made brief eye contact, I ignored it because I was in an important meeting/conversation with faculty and stuff, but mostly again because I bitched out. She passed by a few more times and I still didn't step out.  \nI tried to man up and sent her a facebook friend request, but she ignored it. Is this because she's offended or otherwise not interested in me? I'm pretty sure she's single.", "summary": "Ignored a chick giving me signs, sent a facebook request *way* later, she ignored it. Is she upset with me or something?"}
{"id": "t3_1b03vu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend's (19/f) parents are control freaks and won't let me(18/m) hang out with her alone.. Together for 11 months.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for 11 months and going on a year in 2 weeks. In the beginning of our relationship, she was allowed to come over to my house, hang out, play with my siblings, and talk with my parents whenever she wanted to. However, as the relationship progressed, her parents cut her off from going to my house AT ALL without a valid reason. It's been 4 months since she has stepped foot in my house and it is really starting it irritate me. Her parents are nasty control freaks and make her text them every minute she is out of their house, even at school. I can no longer hang out with her alone and can only if she has a friend accompanying her. These new \"rules\" came out of the blue and her parents didn't even give me a reason and my girlfriend doesn't know why they did it either. She has a 4.5gpa, is the valedictorian of our school, and does many things for our community so it's not like she is this bad person. We will be going to college in less then 4 months and I want to spend as much time together as we can, but they are preventing this from happening. We already decided that we will be doing a LDR, but I don't see how it can work with how much her parents control her life.\n\nIs there anything I can do to change this? I would go and talk to her parents but I'm afraid that they will never allow me to see her again.", "summary": "Girlfriend of 11 months suddenly isn't allowed to hang out with me alone or allowed to come over to my house because of her strict controlling parents, but I'm allowed to go over there."}
{"id": "t3_jbxuz", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Two HUGE NSVs", "post": "Hey /r/loseit.  I'm just checking in.  I haven't posted anything major here in about a month.  My last check in was a [100lb milestone.](\n\nSince then, I've lost another 10 lbs.  \n\nLast week I was featured in an ad campaign for my gym.  Full page advertisement, all week in the area (4 parish area) newspaper.\n\nThis week, my wife and I went to the mall for a haircut.  My stylist was busy, so we went and looked at jeans.\n\nI've been wearing 36x30 Levi 501s.  The waist is quite loose now, but the legs keep getting progressively tighter (dang squats).\n\nIn order to find jeans that would accommodate my newly skinny waist, I had to find larger leg jeans.  That kinda made me sad, because I used to have to wear Levi 569, and both the legs and waist were tight.\n\nI pulled some 34x30s off the rack and slid them on with ease.  I had quite a bit of room in them too.  I decided to try on the 32x30s, just for kicks and grins.  **They FIT!**  I had plenty of room in the waist (pulled up to my belly button), but the legs were a touch snug in both the calf and thigh (DANG SQUATS!).\n\nAs a reference.  One year ago, I got my current job.  My previous job required that I wear slacks and a tie every day.  My new job was polos and jeans.  I had 7-8 pairs of slacks, but no jeans.  A year ago this week, I went and purchased a pair of Levi 569s.  They were 46x30.", "summary": "I was featured in an ad campaign for my gym and found out that I've lost 14\" off my waist in about 1 year."}
{"id": "t3_4xzwuv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] with my boyfriend [32 M] of 6 months, we hardly ever have sex and it's killing my self-esteem. Need some perspective.", "post": "I'm in a fairly new relationship with a great man. He's not perfect but neither am I and for the most part I think that things are going very well. We laugh a lot together and I definitely miss him when we're apart. In a short time he's become an important part of my life that I don't want to lose. \n\nAll that being said... the last 2 months or so we have only had sex probably 4 or 5 times. I know that for a lot of people who have been together a long time that wouldn't be unusual but for a relatively young couple who have only been together 6 months I feel like we should be doing it much more often. I am always the one who initiates and he often will huff and act like it's a chore but give in to make me happy. Last night it had been 2 weeks and we were finally about to be intimate again but he wasn't able to stay aroused. I was mortified but tried not to make a big deal about it because I didn't want him to be embarrassed either. At this point I'm really starting to think that he's just not sexually attracted to me. He's a British expat (I live in Texas) and doesn't know many people here so I'm thinking more and more that he's with me just so that he's not alone on the weekend and that he may not have sexual or romantic feelings about me at all. I can feel myself becoming more self conscious and withdrawing from him but I don't know how to stop it. If I try to speak to him about it he just rolls his eyes and tells me that I'm over analyzing everything. \n\nI know enough about men to logically understand that this may not be about me at all but might be about stress or something else that he's dealing with on his own but I can't help that every time he rejects me it feels like a slap in the face. A sexless relationship isn't something that I'm willing to consider long term so I want to nip this in the bud before that's what we're left with. Any advice is appreciated.", "summary": "Boyfriend rarely wants to have sex and I take it personally every time he rejects me. Now I'm wondering if he's attracted to me at all."}
{"id": "t3_m001r", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help! Chronic weight loss!", "post": "Hey. I'm an American Male, 22 and until a month ago I ran 8 miles a day, off-road (trail-running) and did upper-body workouts every other day. I am vegetarian, although I only eat goat cheese and honey every few weeks, so I suppose I am almost Vegan. I had a super healthy diet with a few gallons of water daily, no processed food and I followed the O-Type diet religiously. I was 153 lbs steady and 5' 10\" (177.5 cm for my lovely friends ~~across the pond~~ everywhere else.)\n\nA month ago the love of my life and I ended our relationship with joint cooperation, although I was still devastated. I lost my appetite and stopped exercising. For almost a month (Read: 24 days) my daily diet was been liquid, with 400 calories of pure fruit juice and maybe 300 calories of soy milk a day. I lost weight and I may have hit close to 120 lbs. During the last five days I started eating solid food such as fruit, rice and quinoa, and no matter what I have diarrhea or throw up. I'm not hungry at all, but I don't wanna die you guys. Medicine comes up as well. Daily, every morning, once at lunch and two times at dinner. I am a poor student with no living family or healthcare. Is this the end you guys?", "summary": "Solid food and medicine won't stay down. I am losing weight and I have no healthcare (or access to healthcare.) What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1z8jvx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I (29M) a fool for her (28F)?", "post": "Here's the Story:\nI(29M) meet girl (27F) online, we enjoy chatting with each other.  She tells me she is in the process of getting a divorce with an alcoholic, to whom she's been married a little more than a year.  \nI say \"whatever, I'm cool with that.\"\n\nWe go out on a date.  We hit it off amazingly.  We can't stop talking to each other on the phone.  The \"relationship\" develops, (\"relationship\" because she's still too fresh off the marriage) We became amazingly close. Honestly, there is a lot of future talk going on. We both know there is something wonderful here.  \n\n(More information:.... She's a RN)\nJanuary 2014: Her ex-husband gets into a BAD accident. She instantly rushes to his side.... Brings him to her home and takes care of him.  All the while I'm left to myself, only receiving calls when she is completely out of earshot of him.\n\nFebruary 5, 2014: She tells me \"I need to figure out who I am\"\nFebruary 12, 2014: Calls and says \"I miss you too much\"\n\nFebruary 28 2014: We've been taking for two weeks.  Seems to me like we're more friends now than anything. (and we are complete opposites on paper)\n\nTo be truthful: I'm a SAP who hasn't had many meaningful relationships, and want to know what to think of this one.", "summary": "Girl I'm dating went to aid her ex husband, Need to know if I'm really that big of a SAP."}
{"id": "t3_2x09jc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 19 months are attending her brothers wedding. They hate eachother", "post": "Hey /relationships. My first time posting here since I really couldn't find a better place to ask a question like this. I apologize if there was a better place to post this but it seemed most appropriate in here.\n\nAnyways, my girlfriend and I have been dating for 19 months and just moved in together last November. We are really close and have both met each other's families etc. Except for one thing, I haven't met her brother yet. From what she's told me, the two of them get into verbal and physical confrontations basically everytime they're in the same room as each other. For example, last time she was home and he was there, she was in the kitchen and her brother asked their mom \"When is that retard (my gf) getting out of the kitchen?\" He never speaks to her directly. Always makes insults indirectly at her. \n\nA little background about me, I am the oldest of three kids in a very tight knit family. I treat my younger brother and sister with the utmost respect. I love them so much and would never do anything intentionally to harm them or their feelings. So this behavior/relationship my gf has with her brother is completely out of the ordinary for me.\n\nNext weekend we are going to his wedding which is taking place at their parents house. This will be my first time meeting him. I come to you to ask what is the appropriate way to handle her brother? My plan is to just treat him with respect as if I know nothing about her relationship with him. But then what if he starts making remarks about her? What do I do? It's his wedding weekend at the house he grew up in so me making a scene would be a really bad idea, right?", "summary": "My girlfriends brother's wedding is next weekend. They hate each other. How do I handle their verbal/physical altercations?"}
{"id": "t3_3evmi6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 M] can't calm my [20 F] girlfriend down. She is in the Army, I'm in a city known for nightlife.", "post": "My girlfriend here in Israel is 20, and I'm 25 (American). She is on her base all week, and I see her on weekends usually, which has worked out well so far. We talk often. I'm very much in love with her and she is with me.\n\nI just moved from a boring place to the absolute center of Tel Aviv, and it's become clear to me that the change in my circumstance has her nervous... because that's exactly what she said to me.\n\nThe first night I was in my new place I was invited out by a roommate, and so I went obviously because I'm new in a foreign city and desperately need friends. She called while I was out and so I found a quiet spot and talked to her for a bit, and since then she has been distant.\n\nWhen I talked to her this morning I tried to explain that no matter where I am or who I'm with, she's completely #1 for me, but it doesn't help. She says just talking about it makes her nervous.\n\nShe has said many times that \"All the women will look at you and try to steal you\" etc., so maybe it's the sudden proximity to a lot of single girls, but really it doesn't matter if Bar Rafaeli herself approached me... I'm a man of my word and I literally only care about this one girl. I could see myself marrying her.\n\nI just can't seem to get past these weird fears she has that somehow I will find someone else, and now it's making me nervous also, because I don't want her to see our situation as hopeless either!", "summary": "Younger girlfriend who I am 100% in love with thinks my new living situation puts the relationship at risk, and I can't convince her that's completely false."}
{"id": "t3_3aegv4", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me [34/F] got frustrated with my boyfriend [34/M] last night. He rebuffed my advances.", "post": "We've been dating for 4 months, but we knew each other for several years prior to dating. Before my boyfriend went to work in the morning we had a quickie, but that left me wanting more. All day yesterday I had been telling him he left my craving more and that I wanted him when he got home at night.\n\nSo the night came, we were cudding on the couch and I made my advance. It should not have come as a surprise because I had been telling him I wanted him all day. I started kissing him and rubbing on him, but I could tell he sort of wasn't into it. I don't know why but I got really frustrated, I stood up and told him \"Fine, I see you don't want to play, so I am just going to leave you alone.\"  I walked away for a few minutes and then I came to sit back down with him. At his point he had his head down and started crying. I felt really bad!\n\nI apologized and we talked. He has told me he is trying to take it slow because in his past relationships he always had a lot of sex and they ended up breaking his heart. He is somehow associating that if he has a lot of sex then the relationship will go sour. He has assured me he wants things to work out for the long haul and is serious about our relationship, I'm just trying to figure out this part.\n\nAnytime he approaches me when he is horny I am glad to satisfy him, but when I approached him last night I felt rebuffed.\n\nDid I overract? Should I try not approching him for a little while, like giving sex a break for a few days? \n\nHe is a very sensitive guy, and I know that already. I want to be considerate of his feelings. Yet at the same time I want him to understand my needs as well.", "summary": "Got frustrated when bf rebuffed my advances, I walked away from him, he felt hurt and so did I. Did I overract? Should I try not approching him for a little while?"}
{"id": "t3_1n2xrt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20/f] Grandad [85/m] recently went into hospital following a health scare. I'm having trouble with the thought of his death.", "post": "A little bit of background. I've always been very close to my grandparents on my dad's side and have always lived within 10 minutes walking distance until I went to university two years ago. I now attend a university 200 miles away from home.\n\nRecently, my 85 year old grandfather went into hospital because of a fall but more tests are being done due to his memory and his confusion which he's been dealing with for years but it has gotten worse.\n\nI'm not at home at the moment so have been getting updates from my mum about how he is and apparently he is going to be getting home soon which is fantastic news but, it's hit me that sooner or later, I'm going to have to deal with the death of my grandparents and I'm terrified and haven't been able to stop crying for the last few days.\n\nMy granddad on my mum's side died when I was only 10 so I don't think I was really emotionally mature enough to really understand it - obviously I was incredibly upset but I don't remember much from that age. My nan on my mum's side is also fit and well so I've never really worried about her before.\n\nI'm going home in a couple of weeks so will be making sure that I see my grandparents whilst I'm back but right now I just feel incredibly scared and I'm not sure how I'm going to deal with death when it happens.\n\nI'm sorry if this doesn't make much sense but I've been quite upset about the whole thing.", "summary": "Grandfather in hospital, will be coming home soon but it's made me realise that one day I will have to deal with his death and I'm scared and upset."}
{"id": "t3_1to7lr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a 20 year old girl and I have PTSD and it's interfering with my partner [21 M]", "post": "I have severe depression, Post traumatic stress disorder and severe anxiety due to being physically abused by my sisters for so many years and in high school I was forced into a sexual relationship with a boy for 6 years. I was also locked in my room on many occasions by my mum until i screamed and passed out.\n\n***\nMy relationship with my partner (whom I've been with for over 5 years now) was very rough at first but all is good, I've become more patient and so has he. We understand each other and we love each other but I have one problem, I have no sex drive and I'm finding it hard to accept his touch even if it just a small pat. \n\nI want to with my heart and soul but my body reacts differently. I've seen my doctor and its a side effect of my medication (anti-depressants and anti-anxiety) but there must be a way around it.\n\n \nI'm all open to suggestions and questions.", "summary": "[20 F] Girl with emotional problems and traumatic past can't be touched and can't have sex even though I want to with my [21 M] Partner of 5 years"}
{"id": "t3_1ceb1g", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Dealing with a frenemy who just. won't. go. away.", "post": "I'm in graduate school, and over the past several years, I've had what I would call a 'frenemy'. This girl has been hot and cold with me for as long as we've had classes together - sometimes she would invite me to spend time with her and her friends, and then completely stop talking to me, claiming that she's busy (which, as I've come to learn, 'busy' is 99% of the time a cover). She says a lot of nasty things about people, and then turns around and spends time with them. \n\nThis past year was really hard for me due to personal issues, and while she and I were never that close, we became closer. She became supportive and would listen to me. I thought maybe she had grown, and I started to trust her.\n\nThat all changed when one of her male friends (that she has a thing for) told her he was interested in me - and he and I never met. She completely stopped talking to me, and the only reason I know this is because of a mutual friend.\n\nI asked her in general if things were ok and how she was doing, and she said everything was good - so she wouldn't address this with me directly. I didn't want to directly say that I knew what her problem was, because I figured at this point, she should just be able to tell me what was up. \n\nMonths later, out of the blue, she texts me and says that she's been really busy and not to take it personally that she hasn't been around. I said that I do take it personally, and then she responded back with how she doesn't have the energy to deal with me because she's so 'busy'. \n\nI'm SO done with her, and I've totally disconnected from her, as I find this response to be seriously rude and dishonest.\n\nThe issue is, we have a lot of mutual friends. How can I handle my disdain for her gracefully?", "summary": "Grad school frenemy is mentally a middle school bitch, but we travel in the same social circles. How to deal with her?"}
{"id": "t3_3bs11p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F/23] have had only 1 relationship and don't know what to do relationship and sex wise with date [M/25]", "post": "I'll try to make this short(ish).\nSo I have had only one committed relationship in my life; my high school AND college sweetheart. We were together for eight years. He is the guy I lost my virginity to and the only boyfriend I have ever had. However, we broke up this January. I am completely over it now. Haven't really dated since, just some coffees and lunch dates. Decided to get off the pill because it was terrible for my mood, libido and was causing some physical complaints. Haven't had sex since January, fine with me.\n\nBut now I started dating this guy and I really like him. It's actually scary to admit because I have only experienced this beginning phase of love ONCE: almost nine freaking years ago. We have been on three dates, kissed and I hope to call him my boyfriend in the future.\n\nHowever this shit is frightening me. I thought I was super experienced due to my eight year relationship but turns out I know nothing. It's been three dates and we haven't had sex. My girlfriends are telling me I am weird en prude for not having sex yet and that he'll probably won't want a fourth or fifth date. It's not even the sex itself that I am concerned about, it's the damn pill. I don't want to rely on solely a condom, but I only got off the pill three months ago and my period still isn't perfectly regular. I just don't want to fuck up my body again but maybe I should to keep him happy?\n\nAlso, when do you start thinking about being boyfriend-girlfriend? It's only been three dates over a course of 1,5 month, is that extremely short? Long? Normal?\n\nBasically I am a giant noob and need advice.", "summary": "had only one long relationship, don't know what to do with sex and being exclusive after 3 dates. Don't really want to get back on the pill but think maybe I should."}
{"id": "t3_z5sab", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So I just asked my girlfriend [21] to tie up loose ends with her ex. I [24] need opinions if I did the right thing.", "post": "Hear me out here.\n\nA few days ago my girlfriend and I were having a heart-to-heart talk and we suddenly got to the topic of relationships.  I got uneasy when she started talking about her past relationships, but she was fine with talking about it so casually so I was like, why not.\n\nThere is this one guy she keeps mentioning though. It was her ex before me. Her longest relationship too, albeit being an on-and-off thing for 2 years. She told me a LOT about this guy, how they were doing, why they broke up, how they went back again, broke up and went out again..the usual on-off jazz. And then it ended for good because it just didn't work for her, and that was that.\n\nHere's the thing though: she told me they talk occasionally online. Usual chit-chat I guess? She told me she treats him as a friend, that it's not every day or week they talk. About a month or two before he resurfaces and talks again.\n\nThen it bit me: what if the guy wasn't over her yet? I talked to her about it and she told me she doesn't like talking to the guy except she feels obligated to do so because, you know, friends right?\n\nI felt horrible though. Why would he? I mean, I know people check how their exes are doing every now and then, stalking I guess but never talking, but when they want to talk..should I be worried? So I asked her to tell the guy off. Like, close it completely and move on and not talk to her any more.\n\nI was just wondering: I've never asked her anything that..important, I guess..to not talk to another person. It eats me away inside, but was it right for me to ask her to do that?", "summary": "I asked my girlfriend to tell her ex to move on since she's got me now and to stop talking to her. But I feel horrible. Was it right for me to ask her that? WHAT I DO."}
{"id": "t3_1jq7je", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [22F] has lost interest in sex with me [22M] completly", "post": "We've been dating for 4.5 years. For the first 3 years things were great, we'd see each other during the week or on the weekends and we never had any issues, maybe had 1 or 2 fights the whole time. \n\nLast year we moved in together and since then sex has dwindled down to nothing... Over christmas we moved back to our folks place until we found another place to live, and have been living together since April. \n\nSlowly sex has started to die off. Since about 2 years ago she's had on and off problems with UTIs/thrush and now we haven't had sex (or anything) in over a month. She now feels that she can't be bothered with sex as it sometimes leads to her in pain and hurting. We recently had a talk and she's said that she just isn't a very sexual person (not the impression I had from the first 3 years together). I know she owns 2 vibrators (one she keeps hidden in a drawer in a different room) and I know they get use.\n\nI can't help but feel depressed about this. She says she's not sexual but it just seems to me that she is, but just not involving me. Sex, or any physical affection, is fairly important in a relationship to me, but neither seem to be to her. What do I do...? What can be done...?", "summary": "Sex has died off after 4.5 years. I know she still masturbates, just no physical affection towards me. I'm not feeling like part of this relationship anymore..."}
{"id": "t3_1yuzn5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm 25, she's 23; just need female perspective. Ladies, I had an amazing first date with this girl (it appeared that way to me) is it possible that her not responding to a text for 24 hours isn't a bad sign?", "post": "Just to be clear, I'm not clingy, I don't care if I don't text someone for days, I'm just trying to figure if we are on the same page or not. I like her, a lot. It's been 7 years for me since my last real relationship and this is the first time in that 7 years that I've felt this way about a girl. \n\nIf it isn't clear by now, I over-analyze *everything*. If you want the honest truth, going 7 years without feeling this way for a girl will make you do some crazy things, hence this post. Even if it's bad news, I just need to ease my mind because not knowing is stressing me the fuck out. \n\nI realize I probably sound crazy and too emotionally invested, but like I said, this doesn't happen often, and I just wish I could know if the feelings are mutual, because at this point I'm kind of assuming the worst (bad habit).\n\nI cannot stress enough that I don't care that she hasn't texted me back, people have lives, etc etc, I get it. but it just kinda worries me that it's a bad sign and I'm curious if the females reading this think not responding to a text for over 24 hours now is probably nothing, probably means something not-so-good, etc. \n\nIf I'm being fucking retarded and you think 24 hours is no big deal and you think she could still be really into me then just say so, you aren't gonna hurt my feelings.\n\nBasically need some kind of reassurance either way, because 7 years without this is a long time and this is stressing me the fuck out, lol.\n\nThank you for tolerating my shenanigans.", "summary": "I'm being ridiculous, I know, but I'm trying to figure out if this girl is on the same page as I am and a lack of response to a text is discomforting."}
{"id": "t3_4lt1fi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My husband 42M with his daughter 18F, conflict over attending high school graduation", "post": "My husband and his ex had a very contentious divorce and it took them 10 years after the divorce to get to the point where they were being polite and reasonable with each other. \n\nMy stepdaughter lives with her Mom in a different state and visits us multiple times a year, per the visitation agreement. My husband and his daughter don't have the best relationship but they do love each other and get along well, or so I thought. \n\nWe were planning on driving down to stepdaughter's city and attending her graduation, so she'd have her father, step mom and half siblings cheering her on in addition to her Mom and stepdad. DH has been asking her about graduation details many times so we could plan our trip, but she kept avoiding him. Though she didn't say anything, eventually he got the message that she didn't want him there. I have been encouraging DH that we should still go and attend since the ceremony doesn't require tickets. \n\nThe graduation is in 4 days and DH got invited by his ex to attend. I think that's a big gesture from her part because she is usually pretty rude to DH. While it was nice of her to invite him, she made it clear that I or our kids (stepdaughter's half siblings) are not welcome. DH tried reaching out to his daughter to ask what she wanted and she's simply avoiding him. \n\nDH has decided he's not going to go to the graduation. I worry that he's going to regret this. I am pushing him to go by himself, attend the event, take pictures and fly back. While I am pretty upset that I am not wanted there, I think it's more important that DH not miss this milestone. \n\nAm I wrong in trying to convince him to do this? How big a loss will it be if he skips this graduation?", "summary": "Stepdaughter didn't invite father and family to graduation. I think he should still go and attend, he's choosing not to."}
{"id": "t3_s54rp", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Should I go for it even though my time is running out?", "post": "So basically there's this girl in my class whom I'm attracted to and I think that there is a chance that we could end up being a couple, but there seems to be a few things that can prevent that from happening. \n\n1. I've heard rumors that she is in an arranged marriage (Her family is Middle Eastern; Haven't confirmed this from her, as she is private and most likely wouldn't want to say anything on the matter)\n\n2. We have a few months left before she goes back home for a couple months and then will be going off to college (I'm only a Junior), and I most likely won't see her ever again unless we end up going to the same college 2 years from now, which does seem likely as we plan on going to the same school. \n\n3. It seems that she's been hurt by a previous guy from what she has told me, and she's told me she hates most guys at our school. \nMy question is: Should I try to start a relationship with her? A lot of people might say hell yeah live life to the fullest and all, which I totally want to do. I just don't know if she feels the same and I'm also looking for a serious relationship, and a few months isn't enough time to do as such. Thanks for reading! :)", "summary": "people: I like a girl who might be in an arranged marriage and I only have a couple months left with her. Should I go for it? Also, I'm 16 and she's 17."}
{"id": "t3_e28wr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Waiting is the hardest part.", "post": "Dear Reddit,I am kinda confused on what to do here so I am seeking your advice. (this is a long one by the way)\n\nThere is a girl who I like very much and still have deep feelings for. We had been dating for a year and four days when we broke up/went on a break as I needed to figure somethings out with myself and needed to take a breather from the relationship. \n\nWe remained close friends (Still are to best of my knowledge)and on three seperate occasions had sex while not technically being together. Fast forward to the current time, I have recently (A week ago) told this girl that I am ready to be in a relationship with her again and still care very deeply for her. \n\nHer reply was that \"I am currently in a relationship\"and then soon added but he leaves for Hong Kong in two weeks for 9 months. I then enquired if it was possible that we could be together at somepoint in the future.She replied that\"Anything is possible and you never know what the future holds\" \n\nNow that being said I still love her very much and am currently waiting for the guy she is seeing to leave the country.I feel that after this happens I will be in a better situation as her friend to win her back.\n\nNow a little about this girl,she can't really deal with seperation and as Hong Kong has a 12 hour time difference and her re-bound is going to be busy with work and developing a social network out there and well won't have that much time for her as a whole. \n\nI am hoping that due to this she won't be  able to handle being in a relationship with this guy and perhaps comes back to me. I know it is a lot to hope for but at the moment I am biding my time awaiting for this guy to leave. \n\nWell Reddit I ask you what would you do in my situation,would you wait as you said you would and waitfor the re-bound guy to leave, before talking to her again and take it as friends (Like I am currently doing) or would you do something else. \n\nThanks.", "summary": "broke up , still like girl , re-bound guy leaving for Hong Kong (for over 9 months) still friends with the girl hoping to get her back...what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2ujy8r", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being lazy and gettin my 290x urinated on", "post": "So this story started a week ago and concluded today. I live in a house, and my neighbours are 1 abbandoned house(some lady emigrated to Canada) and the other one is still a construction site, and its being like this for atleast 2 years since i moved in. That means there are lot of mice  nesting in those 2  buildings. Being winter those little buggers always try to get in my house via the open door. Usually they are murdered by my trustworthy cocker spaniel but somehow this one kept escaping her  for about a week. My wife started nagging me to get some traps and get the motherfucker, but i always said that i have faith in the dog. \n\n  Today after i came from work, while my wife was cooking dinner i was browsing the inernets, suddenly  my monitors black out, and the fan from my video card goes full throttle. I have a 290x reference so  the fan goes real loud like 2 vacuum cleaners and 2 hair dryers all on max speed kinda like this  . I power down the pc remove the panel and check the video card. I switch the bios from UBER mode to normal and power the pc again trying to determine if it was a bios issue. The fan goes again 100% and a mouse jumps from unused hdd bays. I power the pc down, remove the video card and see some mouse piss on it. \n\n  The little fucker literally pissed on my card. I took the isopropyl alcohol and  washed the back of the card real good the used a hair dryer on it for about 3 mins. Plugged in and it freaking worked!! Meanwhile the little fucker was laying dead in the middle of my living room with my dog wagging her tail proudly.When he jumped from my pc case he jumped right in front of my dog and got what it deserved by pissing on my precious. Also found out that he got inside the case by entering in the slot where i had a tv-tuner which i removed and forgot to put the back plate.", "summary": "mouse got inside the house, was lazy catching him, he pissed on my 290x  and made it go full fan speed. Mouse crushed to death by my cocker spaniel."}
{"id": "t3_hzfwr", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Using ATM's in Europe: A guide to Chip & Pin cards", "post": "Hi guys.  I am using this post for personal reference but I also want to open it up to everyone as it is a current theme for Americans travelling in Europe and is great information for the people who need it.  I suspect this information will only come from insiders who know and have experienced the true problem of chip & pin requirements that Europe is converting their ATMs to.\n\nWith that said, please post a reply in the following manner:\nCountries:  Still Works [atm names] / Requires Chip & Pin [atm names]\n\nI will be travelling to London, Paris, Brussels, Amsterdam, Berlin and Munich so if anyone has input on those cities please respond as I'm leaving in two weeks :)", "summary": "Many European ATMs are requiring a chip in addition to the PIN to authorize a transaction.  Which ATMs do and don't require the chip?"}
{"id": "t3_1bupxn", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (23F) moved to a new city with my boyfriend(28M). Was I wrong for doing this?", "post": "I have been dating my boyfriend for about 2 years now. We met online and had instant chemistry. We had a rocky start because he is very progressive and I am extremely old fashioned. The first time he told me he loved me was, I think, more of a cover up for the fact that he also revealed he'd gotten a girl pregnant just before dating me. He told her he didn't want anything to do with it and that I was his priority. Probably my first indication to run. \n\nLater I found he had been talking to ex's back in his hometown(very far away from where we are) and I wanted to call it quits at that point. I decided not to because I had already fallen in love with him and trusted him when he said he's change. \n\nDon't get me wrong, he makes me ecstatically happy, otherwise I wouldn't have stayed. We talk about marriage and children a lot. Now we have picked up our lives and moved together to an entirely new city so that we both could have better jobs, but I think I need a fresh start and probably a break from men who do not know what it means to be exclusive. Also I find he texts women from work more often than he should. He has a lot of female interaction on his job and I don't trust him with it. This is what sparked my post.", "summary": "My boyfriend of two years has betrayed my trust on several occasions. How do I begin a new life after moving away from everything?"}
{"id": "t3_3erfke", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] recently discovered a work consultant [40/M] is faking his whole Instagram and using it to work his way up the business. What should I do?", "post": "Here's a bit of background. I work for a small startup who hired a marketing consultant who I always felt was a bit full of shit. He always references these brands he works for but has no website and  no history of his work via a business website or history online, for example on LinkedIn.\n\nI recently was on his Instagram and noticed it seemed off. After a bit of research I can conclude that 95% of his followers are fake and he buys his likes. On top of that I have I proof he has stolen photos of private jets, fashion shows around the world etc.\n\nAt work he brags about how great he is at social media. Here is the kicker, I was recently let go because I think he wants his company to do my work and he used his \"credentials\" to make an impression that they are great at what they do. I don't want to look like an asshole for pointing his fake profile but how could I do this in a reasonable way to my employers? On top of that he is friends with the boss.", "summary": "I found out a company consultant  is faking his Instagram to grow in the company. I was recently let go most likely because of him and because he wants to bring the work I did to his company. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3tdxgy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my girlfriend [19F]: How long should we stay together?", "post": "Basically I would just like to get the general opinion of everyone here on the forum.\n\nI met my girlfriend around 2 years ago our first year in college. Within a year after that, we really hit it off and we've been dating ever since. We celebrated our one-year anniversary last month.\n\nWe haven't explicitly talked about this because she's been abroad this semester, and I haven't felt the need to bring it up amidst all the stress she's going through. But I wanted to ask everyone here what my best course of action would be.\n\nBasically I think my girlfriend and I know that we're going to break up at some point - probably after graduation. We make each other really happy, we get along well, and we have a great time together. The sex is great too, and we've been in love a long time.\n\nWe basically started dating for the fun of it: we liked each other, and we've only grown to love each other more and more. The problem is, our long-term goals don't mesh. \n\nShe doesn't want to pursue academics immediately after graduation. I do. That will inevitably create some distance. Also, she's told me many times that she doesn't want to have kids. I do want to have kids. Finally, our religious and philosophical views don't exactly line up.\n\nSo what do you guys think I should do? Right now, I think we're both assuming we'll be together until graduation. We can't really see ourselves with anyone else at the moment. And to be honest I don't think I'm going to find my life partner at my school if it isn't her.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I have incompatible long-term goals and religious/philosophical views. Should I stay in the relationship until graduation for sure, or end it early to look for \"the one\"?"}
{"id": "t3_4sj7u8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex-friend [30 M] is sabotaging my [28 M] professional and romantic relationships. What should I do?", "post": "Hi, /r/relationships.\n\nI had a falling out with a friend and business partner, call him John, who I've known for almost a decade. He was controlling, condescending, manipulative, and unfair. When I told him that I didn't appreciate the fact that he naturally assumed a position of power and belittled me, he didn't respond saying that he didn't do those things. Instead, he threw a temper tantrum and asked me why things ought to be fair. I disappeared shortly after. I did nothing wrong to him, I just didn't care to play his games any longer and decided to finally stick up for myself and part ways. I have nothing but contempt for this sorry excuse of a human being.\n\nWe have a lot of the same friends. On one occasion, I asked a friend if I could play a gig. He contacted John behind my back, he told him \"I wouldn't work with Red Cloak,\" and I never heard from that friend again. I know this because John told me. He has also spoken to managers about me which has affected my employment and cost me money.\n\nJust recently, I was talking to a girl [27 F]. We were communicating for a couple of weeks (she lives out of town). She's good friends with John but didn't know we had a falling out. One day, everything about her changed. She brought texting to a halt, stopped returning my calls, and acted very detached. I asked her why and she gave me the whole \"I've just been busy\" routine. I have good reason to believe that she asked John about me, because they still talk/hang out, and he told her to stay away from me. \n\nI don't know what to do about him. I'm not going to apologize for ditching someone who was doing me a great deal of psychological damage. I thought it would be over but I guess he's still looking for blood. What can I do? My anger is tearing me apart.", "summary": "Parted ways with \"friend\" for my psychological well-being and he's preventing me from establishing professional and romantic relationships and I don't know what to do about it."}
{"id": "t3_1e9ald", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "LDR [F18] Goesn on date date prom problems [M21]", "post": "First time posting here so sorry if I mess up.\n\nI've been a relationship with my girlfriend for just over 10 months, Im from England [m21], and shes from america, we met up at a summer camp and hit it off well. All was fine we visited each other often when we could,\n\nShe tells me she's going to prom and going with her girlfriends which I was fine with since the rest of her friends are single and have no-one to go with, this was the plan until the day before prom when her male friend decided he wanted to go and would be going with them. (They've been friends for a few years in school Im sure he did have a crush on her at one point)\n\nThe message said \"I might be going to prom with matt now\" which to me says I'm going with this one person as a date. I told her I didn't like it but she said that it was more of he's just joining her and her group of friends for the night and he would only come if he got to say he was going with her.\n\nProm night comes and goes all is ok , until the next day when I start seeing pictures, first its of them stood near each other which hurt but I passed it off as ok. \n\nI started talking to her about the photo's and how there were non of them together in a couple like shot and she said \"yeah no way i wouldn't do that\" ... well she did and now I'm really mad and not sure how to confront her.\nShe did offer to not go with him but since she stated it wasn't a date or she was even going with and it was simply him joining her friend circle I told her no as I didn't want to come off as controlling.", "summary": "Gf went to prom with a group of friends and a guy who wasnt a date but they were going and took all couple photo's even though she said she wouldn't do that, how to confront her?"}
{"id": "t3_2o7y4v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34 M] with my Wife [30 F] 8 yr relationship 2 years married. Was I cheated on and how do I go forward?", "post": "Marriage has gotten a bit rockier in the last year or so and during this harder time (financially, emotionally and sexually) wife got bored and found an online boyfriend she would chat with. This included sending naked pictures, chatting and telling her friends she was so in love with this guy. I found out through her just acting strange one day and just kinda unraveled the whole puzzle. \n\nWe have always had 100% trust and honesty as our #1 mission statement so obviously this has hurt quite a bit, although I can still rationalize it as just something to just fill the emotional void I wasn't able to or didn't fill.\n\nWe have discussed the situation and are trying to work on our marriage but I still feel like I'm being an idiot. I would for us to work out more than anything but I'd hate to just set myself up for a future disappointment.", "summary": "Wife found an online boyfriend, I'm not as hurt as I maybe should be because nothing physical really ever happened but that trust is hard to work with right now."}
{"id": "t3_3b97ba", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Auto dealership may have screwed my transmission and is assuming I will pay for the repairs. (All $4900.00 worth.) Not sure how to proceed.", "post": "So a couple of weeks ago I received a notice in the mail from GM stating that my 2006 Pontiac G6 needed to be taken to a dealership for services pertaining to recalls. Nothing was seemingly wrong with my vehicle, but obviously I took it to my closest GM dealership to get the appropriate services taken care of. One of the recalls dictated that the transmission cable required replacement. Within the next week of getting my car serviced, my transmission stopped working. (The vehicle worked perfectly fine in reverse, but not in drive.) So I have it towed to the same dealership to have it looked at. Im not saying I am absolutely positive this dealership screwed up their work on my transmission, but it would be a huge coincidence if they didn't, right? They take a day and a half to get back in contact with my wife after diagnosing the problem. What is the diagnosis you ask? \"Your transmission isn't working.\" Then they tell my wife that it takes 14 hours to take apart a transmission and figure out exactly what the problem is at $100.00 an hour for labor. Plus $3500.00 for a new transmission. But my wife doesn't think to bring up that it was very likely their fault during this conversation. (She was at work and told them to contact me once they were finished with the diagnosis anyway.) And the dealership sure as shit didn't acknowledge that it may be their fault. So, my question is, how do I proceed when I show up at the dealership at 8 A.M. tomorrow?", "summary": "Dealership may have fucked up a recall service and seems to be expecting me to pay for the labor and parts. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_x704s", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Broken up for over six weeks, will inevitably run into her in the coming week... What to do?", "post": "It's been well over six weeks since she (f 19) dumped me (m 19) and flew to another country to study over the break. But the new university semester is starting next week and I just know that we will eventually cross paths.\n\nWe dated for about a year and she was my best friend ever since we were first years. We had some trust issues and other trivial fights about her friends and her constant need to go partying and clubbing. I prefer quiet nights at home rather dark night clubs with crap music and drunks. I loved her very much but I was pushing her away with my distrust and paranoia... She couldn't handle it so she left me. She broke my heart.\n\nI study Engineering and Physics and she studies Law and Arts, so we'll unlikely bump into each other around campus. However the problem is that we are both apart of many common clubs and societies at uni. We are also executives for 2 certain societies, so I will inevitably see her board meeting and events... I don't know what to do... I don't think I will be able to face her... \n\nShould I skip out on these events and meetings? Should I attend? What do I do?!", "summary": "Girl dumped me 6 weeks ago and went overseas. She is back in the country and I will eventually cross paths with her at university for social clubs and societies executive duties. Should I avoid these meetings?"}
{"id": "t3_2vdl26", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(24/F) I hate losing arguments to my bf (27/m)", "post": "I just got into another heated petty argument with my bf of 3 years! He started telling our roommate a story about someone, I was sure he was thinking of something else, he stops dead in his tracks and tells me that that's not what happened. I said more details of what I remembered, he told me again that I was wrong and I should believe him because it's a story that happened to him. He said what he always does, \"why is it that when we disagree you assume I must be wrong? Why don't you ever consider that you could be wrong?\" \n\nBy that point I had realized it was possible I was wrong, but I absolutely did not want to concede that to him or offer him any slack. I don't get like this with everybody, but my bf and I both have this stupid trait of never backing down! And I hate admitting I'm wrong to him because I feel like he acts super smug and condescending, when I make a mistake he laughs at me in an \"oh, you\" sort of way that INFURIATES me. I know I overreact to this sort of thing but I don't know how to improve!", "summary": "I hate losing even tiny arguments to my BF because I feel like he thinks he's superior to me and it drives me crazy!"}
{"id": "t3_11a2l0", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "20[M]. Cute girl in class. Not sure how to approach.", "post": "There is a really cute girl in one of my classes that I'd really like to ask out. There are a few problems though. I have a really good female friend in the class and we talk a lot and I always walk with her to her next class or whatever and she's completely unchill so if I tell her what's up (don't wait up I'm about to ask this girl out) she'll totally blow it. Also the one day I struck up the nerve to talk to her I discovered that every lecture when it's over she makes a beeline for the exit and disappears like a god damn ninja. All of the above are also, while true, excuses for the fact that I've never asked someone out cold before. I don't know how people can just walk up to someone they know nothing about except their name (or sometimes not even their name) and be like \"hey, let's go get lunch?\" The only way I've ever done this before is to just make small talk with them about something interesting in the class or something on their person and then at the end of the conversation see if they want to do something. I'd say that I should just take something from class that was interesting and say \"what do you think about X\" but it's like the most boring god damn class ever (professional writing).", "summary": "I'm having trouble asking a girl out for a bunch of reasons both practical and nerves related. How do I overcome these problems in 10 minutes because I have a class right after?"}
{"id": "t3_nsjq0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can we stop with the wedding showers and start with the life showers?", "post": "So the whole point in wedding shower is to come together as a community and help a couple start their lives together. My question is why do we have to wait until we are getting married? My best guess is people (especially women) didn't start their own lives before marriage. But the world has changed! I've graduated college, am living on my own, and working. Life has already started for me. It would be really nice to have my friends and family help me to establish a nice place for myself. I am doing it on my own, and there is a lot of satisfaction in the independence of it. Still, it seems kind of unfair to have to wait until engagement for community support. Reddit parents who have a son or daughter who is becoming or recently financially independent, tell your friends and family to skip the wedding shower and throw them a life shower.", "summary": "Life starts before you get married. Lets come together and help people, rather than couples, start a nice life for themselves."}
{"id": "t3_2trspq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Sexless marriage (28/F) and incredibly horny (36/M). Advice please.", "post": "I (36/M) have the sex drive of a rabbit.  I'm horny all the time.  For the last 2 years, my wife (28/F) has developed anxiety issues and also perceives our marriage as more of a friendship than lovers.  We have sex maybe once every 2 months, and even then, its not a good time.  Its like she feels like she's having to do it to make me happy and I just want her to want to have sex with me.  We get along in every day life and we hang out and whatnot, but intimacy has dwindled to almost zero.  She has pretty much checked out, sexually and has no desire to make things better in the bedroom.  I do not want to cheat on my wife, but I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.  Im incredibly horny every day, I dont want masturbate every day so I can function, and I really yearn to be intimate with a woman.  Like even kissing and making out and making love would be awesome.  What else is difficult is that I'm a fairly good-looking guy so getting women is not a problem.  I really just want to have sex with my wife, even 3 times a week would be great.  But she wants nothing to do with me and I've resorted to just watching porn and jerking off every day so I'm not an angry bear.  I really hate the state of our marriage and intimacy and want no one else other than my wife, but she literally has no sex drive and I dont want to feel like I'm making her do anything she doesn't want to do.  I kind of feel like she's not really contributing to this marriage, but I'd be an asshole if I went out and sought intimacy from another woman.  Any advice would be appreciated.  Thanks", "summary": "She's never horny, has no sex drive.  I'm always horny.  Dont wanna cheat, but its becoming more difficult not seek intimacy elsewhere."}
{"id": "t3_4g8wkd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M/F] with my SO [25 M] of 3 years, quitting smoking", "post": "I have known my boyfriend for about 8 years, we have been together for 3. He has been smoking from about age 15.\n\nEven before we were together he has said that he want's to quit smoking. He has been doing this thing where he says he will quit tomorrow, or that he he has to finish the pack and then he will quit or similar. He says that at least once a week. Then he won't really try. He will get new cigarettes that same evening.\n\nI hate that he smokes, but I don't think I can really help with that. That is something he needs to do on his own.\n\nProblem is that I really dislike being in this limbo. I am the kind of person who likes everything to be clear. So this constant 'I'm quitting smoking, but not really' can get on my nerves. Most of the time I let it fly over my head, but sometimes it really annoys me. \n\nHow do I deal with this? Is there any way I can help him?", "summary": "BF want's to quit smoking and is not really trying, but constantly talks about it. It annoys me and I don't know how to deal with situation."}
{"id": "t3_ert84", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I had to defend a friend from being called a negative nancy tonight when he was in a downswing in life. What is with people?", "post": "This irks me quite a bit regarding the nature of people. I understand that \"negativity\" can be inferred as a trait amongst certain types of people, however, how does it help the situation when the same person receives a barrage of name calling such as \"negative nancy\"? Shit, is it even a \"trait\" at all? Perhaps nobody has actually helped this person see the positive light of things since the beginning of the downswing in their life? Is it hard for people to be uplifting to others when they clearly know that this person is having a difficult time in their lives? Actually, you don't even need to know whether someone is having a downswing in their life. It's just downright rude to call someone \"negative\" straight to their face when you aren't even aware of what may actually be going on behind the scenes.", "summary": "Don't call someone, especially someone you don't even know, negative to their face. Things might really be in the gutter for them."}
{"id": "t3_3rdhd7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My unconfrontational self [22 F] confronting my noisy upstairs neighbor [20ish M/F] who plays the drums.", "post": "This is not the traditional relationship, if there's a better place to post this, educate me.\n\nFirst, let me describe my relevant living situation. I live in student-style housing in the Netherlands. My room is located in a corridor that is locked by key on either side, which is relevant.\n\nSo, the issue:\n\nThe past couple of weeks, my upstairs neighbor has taken up drumming. Whether it is drumming on actual drums, tapping his desk, or an equivalent, I have no idea. I can, however, hear it. Is it in my right to do anything about this? They're in their own space, it is not an ungodly hour, but I don't want to be subjected to this! I am not a confrontational person, calm or otherwise. Things I have tried to send a message to my upstairs neighbor that their drumming is undesired:\n\n* Hitting my ceiling with a broom \n* Hitting my ceiling with my palm\n* Hitting my ceiling with a water bottle\n* Hitting my ceiling with a can of sausages\n\nUnfortunately, my revolutionary tactics have failed. This could be due a lack of fucks given, they're dumb shits who can't take a hint, or they can't hear my attempts to save my sanity. It has crossed my mind to go knock on their door, which scares the living shit out of me anyways. However, I can not. The only way I could go knock on their door is to get through their locked corridor door or ring their door bell. BUT, I don't know their room number. It a terribly designed building, so the numbers are not consistent from corridor to corridor.\n\nSo, c'mon reddit! Let's hear those creative ideas. How do I get my neighbor to shut the fuck up?", "summary": "My upstairs neighbor drums. I can hear it. I don't want to hear it. I am not confrontational. Canned sausages are not working. How do I get them to stop drumming?"}
{"id": "t3_36oxxj", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm (16/f) really scared for my current girlfriend (16/f) who likes older guys", "post": "first time using reddit guys; wish me luck. anyways, i'm terrified, and i'd like your help. my current (and first) girlfriend who is bisexual   says that she'd be fine with dating guys that 20-27. She's dated this drug dealer in the past when she was younger, and it didn't go well. she says she can handle it, and sometimes she said after we break up she won't date guys that old, but for some reason i don't believe her. She's also depressed and has been clean from smoking and other drugs since we dated, but I'm pretty sure she'd go back into that if she dated guys older than her. To be honest, I'm terrified. I really just want her to be happy and safe, but I feel like she wouldn't be. She always points out 20 year old guys that are hot to me. It's kind of worrying. Is there any way I can convince her not to be with older guys who I know would treat her like shit?", "summary": "my girlfriend likes older guys and i know they'd treat her terribly. any way i can convince her to date people her own age?"}
{"id": "t3_3jkrii", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My [26F] bf's [27M] best friend [27M] is selfish and takes advantage of him and doesn't appreciate anything we do.", "post": "My boyfriend's best friend of over 10 years is a selfish, center of attention type person. He always needs to be in the spotlight and leeches off of my boyfriend and I. My bf doesn't have a job while he does. He asks for rides to the gym, when we're going for lunch, dinner, rock climbing, etc, uses my bf's netflix account (and asks us to get off when netflix doesn't let him on so he can watch a show with a girl he is currently dating at the time). My bf would lend his bed to him for a night and his friend would have sex in it with his gf (at the time). He complains about how expensive rent/gas is for him yet goes to bars, takes girls out on dinner dates, etc. and it comes across as it justifies him to leech from us.\n\nIt was his birthday a couple of months ago and we were moving out the next day. We still weren't fully packed for the next morning, but all he wanted to do is hang out with my bf. He came over for dinner (which we made), talked about the girls he was dating and didn't care for things I had to say. He rushed my boyfriend to pack a couple of things then they left to go back to his place while I stayed behind to pack up the rest of the night. We still weren't ready for the next morning. He really should've just come by and helped us pack since my bf helped him unpack when he moved.\n\nOf all the things that I have done for him, he has never tried to return the favour or done anything to show how appreciative he is. He's that guy who comes by, steals your wifi, your food, your netflix, and peaces out once he gets what he has because he doesn't want to spend a dime himself.\n\nI really don't know how to express this to my bf, especially since he says he doesn't mind his friend's behavior. I don't need my bf to stop seeing his best friend, but maybe try to influence him to treat people better.", "summary": "Bf's friend is a leech and doesn't care about anyone else but himself. It's causing a dilemma for me because it's his best friend."}
{"id": "t3_3h9931", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Race Report: First Marathon!", "post": "Hey /R/unnit,\n\nJust wanted to follow up and post a race report for the Yellowknife Overlander Marathon (which was my first ever marathon) that I finished today!\n\nAfter running my first half 6 weeks ago and getting 3 weeks of training before my taper I was woefully underprepared but I set out only to finish. My final time was 4 hours and 20 something minutes, I sadly was so caught up in the moment that I didn't take a look at the clock but I will get my results in the next week.\n\nI woke up at 5 AM today and had my usual long run breakfast of a bagel + energy drink. The weather was between 10-20 celsius, gradually warming up as the time ticked on, but very bearable with the overcast and wind. \n\nMiles 1-13: Fairly uneventful and basically was just warming up at a 10 minute pace or slower, minor irritants like my foot getting a pinch on every step (nothing painful I could just feel it) and my stomach being grumbly.\n\nMIles 13-20: At this point I was starting to feel a bit of fatigue as the miles started to pile on. Around mile 13.5 I got a major cramp in my foot and I had to retie my shoe way tighter which alleviated the issue for the most part. At mile 16 I had to use the washroom really bad and was lucky to snag a toilet out on the route (these were spread out very few and far between) which saved my ass when I felt I was going to burst.\n\n20-24: At this point I felt I had good energy but the wear and tear on my muscles was reaching new levels. Hips, my left knee, my feet, my nips, hamstring were all seizing up and it was some of the most mentally challenging parts of the race.  \n\n24-26: Flat ground and smooth sailing, I was sort of hobbling to make it back but I never walked once! \n\npost 26: I am in bed and everything hurts, theres nothing that isn't aching and I want ice cream...", "summary": "Woefully underprepared for a race, worked my ass off and finished in a better time than I had expected, feel great (except my entire body is aching) and I am totally doing a second."}
{"id": "t3_ehstm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Just broke up with ANOTHER girl... Am I a sociopath or something???", "post": "Hi Reddit, I feel like a jerk.  I'm 23 and just broke up with another girlfriend.  We were going out for ~ 6 months.  Basically she had 80-90% of what i look for but a big issue was that she wasn't opening up and made it hard to build a deep emotional connection with her.  I had brought it up to her before, and given her time, but it just isn't something that i can do without in a relationship, so i ended it (even though i have feelings for her still) ... She said i blindsided her, and was basically devestated.\n\nThis seems to be the same story with every girl i date.  I break up with them because i no longer see a future with the relationship.  They're always crushed.  I always feel bad for hurting their feelings, but not about ending the relationship.\n\nI've never been dumped, and am beginning to think that maybe somethings wrong with me for leaving this wake of emotional destruction with any long term relationship i have :(", "summary": "Im always the one who breaks off the realtionship.  And am beginning to think that somethings wrong with me for never really falling for girls the way they seem to be falling for me."}
{"id": "t3_44peap", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17M] need help understanding what to say to GF[16F] or what to do to make things better after depression.", "post": "So me and my girlfriend have been dating for a little over 7 months now and things have been great but in the past month now things have gotten sour. She has said that I'm manipulating her when I don't think I am. Mr and her talked that through and said that we want our relationship to work. But she has said that she wants space because she says she has lost herself completely. I have very bad depression and at times I would get upset with her for no reason and I've been trying to fix that about myself. She keeps saying that the only way things will work is if I get better and not to worry about our relationship.\n\n But it hurts me evreyday now because I'll see her at school and I can't talk to her because she thinks we should only text until she is ready but it's making me worse because I feel like I've lost her and I don't know what is gonna happen. I just wanna know what to do or say. I've tried and it keeps going back to me getting better but I can't with her being on my mind a ton and not being able to do anything about it.", "summary": "Girlfriend says thst the only way that we will be okay is if I get over my depression and get better but I can't because she says she wants space and we can only text and our relationship is getting bad. Need help"}
{"id": "t3_4omszz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26/F], question about wedding expenses after death of mom[64/F]. Sister [30/f] is getting married soon and we don't know what is asking too much of my Dad", "post": "Hey everyone, long time lurker, first time poster. First time posting on reddit at all actually. I'm posting on my sister's behalf really because she doesn't really get this site. \n\nLong story short, my sister and I have a wonderful relationship with our parents. Very healthy, very loving. Unfortunately, my mom passed away very suddenly a couple of months ago which has hit my family really hard. Not to get into it, it was very unexpected and completely devastating.  My parents were married for 43 years, and were such a role model for my sister and I. My dad is struggling, we all are, but we try and support each other. \n\nMy sister has recently become engaged...she and her fiance are both employed. He is making pretty good money and my sister is doing okay. Not terrible. \n\nAnyway, my parents had retired and were living pretty well off of their pensions. I know they have investments, but I don't know the extent. I obviously didn't really inquire too much about their business.  With the death of my mom, my sister and I worry about my Dad's finances. My mom's retirement and pension was a lot more than my dad's, so we know he took a hit financially. My Dad is a wonderful man, and would pay for the whole thing if he could, but my sister is anxious about asking too much of him. She's stuck because she knows if she doesn't let him pay for anything it'll hurt his feelings but she also doesn't want him paying for too much. \n\nI guess we're just not sure how to approach this. What is normal for parents of the bride to pay for? I was thinking he could help with the venue and her dress but I have no idea. And how do we let him help but not let him give too much?? I'm the maid of honor for my sister, and I'm trying to plan with her, but I'm completely at a loss and any input would be greatly appreciated. I don't know if I gave enough info, I'm pretty scattered. If you have questions I'll be happy to answer.", "summary": "My mom passed away suddenly, dad took a financial hit. Don't know what is expected at this point in regards to wedding planning."}
{"id": "t3_2lvve4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] am invited to Thanksgiving dinner after my parents disowned me over a year ago.", "post": "This is a terribly long story, so I'll try to shorten it and will add follow-up information if needed.\n\nTo start, my parents disowned me at 18 due to religious reasons and the fact that they didn't like my boyfriend (this is the part of the story I'm shortening). They told me to go pack my things, neither me or my boyfriend were ever allowed there, and that I wouldn't be able to talk to my younger siblings until they were 18. At the time my sister was 16 and little brother was 13. \n\nI have since seen my younger siblings a few times, but only while my older sister and/or mother was there. I've emailed my mother a few times and though things aren't peachy, they are certainly better than they once were. If it weren't for my siblings though, I wouldn't speak to her at all. \n\nHer and (more so) my father have been emotionally and verbally abuse to me and the rest of my siblings for as long as I can remember. I no longer have a desire to fix the relationship I have with them, because I have tried many times and it's at the point where I have to stop subjecting myself to the hurt they spread. \n\nI got an email from my mother yesterday asking if I wanted to come to Thanksgiving dinner and I have no idea if I should go. I want to go for my younger siblings, because I love them and love when I do get to see them. However, I don't want my parents to think they are allowed to pretend like nothing has happened and that they've been good parents (they still refuse that they've ever been anything but good parents or see how they've done anything wrong). I also don't want to give them the wrong idea that there's a salvageable relationship between us. \n\nShould I go? Any and all advice would be appreciated.", "summary": "My parents who disowned me want me to come to Thanksgiving dinner. Not sure if I should go or not. "}
{"id": "t3_wx3g6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, is finance a pseudoscience?", "post": "Through my studies (bachelors), I have become more and more disturbed about the \"scientific\" nature of finance. \n\nQuick, what percentage of mutual funds \"beat the market\", i.e. perform better than the index? Studies generally find the number to be between 20 to 30 percent, but in 2011 the number went down to 14%. If these people are so armed with expertise and knowledge, why do people who don't understand anything about financial theory get more just by passively investing in an index fund? If anything, financial \"knowledge\" seems to do more harm than good.\n\nWhen looking at the stuff they teach in universities, you have to wonder how they keep on believing these theories despite the mountain of counterevidence. Stocks are assumed to generate returns relative to risk, quantified as beta in CAPM. Yet, beta has had almost zero correlation with stock returns starting in 1982. If you look at the studies that confirm beta's predictive power, they all used data from the 1970s. But people still use beta to create portfolios.\n\nHow about efficient market theory? Under the theory, stock bubbles should not exist since everythingn is properly priced. But they do exist. Instagram valued at 1 billion despite having no revenue? Definitely properly priced.\n\nEven option pricing models are ridiculous. One model assumes that you can borrow money at the risk-free rate and stocks only generate risk-free rate returns. The black-scholes model also assumes that risk is normally distributed, without looking at historical data, leading to black and scholes' own bankruptcy. \n\nWanna know how we price stocks? We pull magic numbers out of our asses and make it interact with other equally bullshit number to come up with an arbitrary value. Then we try to convince other people that our bullshit is, in fact, legit. The only way stock valuation models are accurate is if stock analysts are clairvoyant and can see 10 years into the future. But even then the analyst won't have to calculate anything and just tell us the stock price.", "summary": "Financial theories need supernatural clairvoyance and are based on arbitrary assumptions that ignore real world and data. Monkeys throwing darts at random perform better than financial experts when it comes to stocks."}
{"id": "t3_1c3dcm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Need help with adopted cat.", "post": "Hey everyone, I recently adopted a cat (about two weeks ago now) She's a 4 year old and is TINY. We set her up in the bathroom because we thought the small space would make it easier for her to transition. So now the problems, she only sits by the toilet when my Fiancee and I are around; She eats in front of me but only if I place the food in front of her and only stands up after extensive petting. She will immediately sit after I'm done petting as well. She's extremely jump and the tiniest noise causes her to curl into a ball and hide her head behind the toilet. She doesn't play, at least not with me, and a laser pointer causes her to go stroke mode and again, hide her head behind the toilet. She doesn't hiss at anything that I've found out yet.. So my question is, does my cat just need more time to get used to her space, and what can I do to get her to come out of her shell? Her history at the shelter says they found her as a new appearance in a Feral colony, so they thought she was a stray. I don't think she's feral because she lets you touch her (not pick her up; and bring your face even close to her is a nono...) She also hasn't tried to escape the house...or leave the bathroom at all (except one night when she tugged my electric shaver down and it caused her to run laps around the house.", "summary": "Adopted a shy cat who is the biggest wuss I've ever met, I don't think she's feral, need HALP."}
{"id": "t3_3sn28t", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Got an associate's in psychology. Transferring to 4 year. Want to go into school psychology. Worried about choosing a college and finances.", "post": "Ok, so I currently have a 3.5 and a recent grad from CC and I'm not sure if it matters which 4 year school I get a bachelor's from or if I go to the school from which I will get a bachelor's, if that will make it easier to get into the masters or Ph.D. / Ed.S. or what have you at that same school. (Probably, I assumed.) My CC and the local 4 year are pretty buddy-buddy and have credit transfer deals and generally help its local students out. But while they have a general psychology bachelor's program, they only have master's and PhDs in counseling. Also, I hear that you can go directly from a bachelor's into a doctorate program, if you have the GPA, undergrad research or enough experience, and good GRE scores. (I like this idea because I'm a relatively poor student and rely heavily on financial aid and small loans.) I'm also wondering about internships and the stipends that come with some of them? Is that just for doctorate programs? I would prefer to baby step it from a masters to a doctorate, I don't want to do anything I'm not 100% ready for. (Sorry if I sound ignorant, I'm the first in my family to get this far.) A friend of mine in agriculture biotechnology is currently attending grad school for her masters mostly because of her internship / job at the school so she can live cheaply off campus.", "summary": "Basically I just need advice on how to make sure my academic costs will be covered at least enough to get a masters. (I hear nightmares about ending up with just a bachelor's in psychology.)"}
{"id": "t3_2n0y1q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[21M] am not sure if I'm dating this girl[20F].", "post": "I had a horrible break up nearly 2 years ago and I'm totally out of this dating for a longer period thing. After my ex broke up I became the guy that went only for the short adventures but this time it is different but I forgot how to do this the right way. I need your honest advice how to act to not destroy this. Here are some more details.\n\nFew weeks ago I met this girl at a party and we talked a lot and I had a great time with her, so I asked for her number and got it. After that we started to text each other a lot and I asked her out to the movies and it was basically great but nothing serious happened.\n\nNo Kiss - just a hug.\n\ntbh I haven't done a right approach since I kinda got shy somehow. It's weird because normally I'm the complete opposite.\n\nThe next time we met she invited me to her place and we watched a movie together. Things got more \"touchy\" - we cuddled and were more playful but her family (including younger siblings that disturbed us) was at home so a kiss on her cheek was the limit.\n\nNow here comes the part where I need your help. I know I like her very much and haven't felt this way for a long time but I don't know if she feels the same for me.\n\nI will meet her this Sunday at a quit romantic Christmas market. What is your advice to get this flirt-thingy to the real dating and how can I really ask her how she feels for me?", "summary": "Please give me advice how to get this flirt-thing to real dating with the girl I've been seeing for a while."}
{"id": "t3_3pteln", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [19/M] convince my girlfriend [18/F] that it's over, because she refuses to accept it.", "post": "My longdistance relationship of 1 year ended today. We live 2 hours away from each other and we dont talk on the phone, so I texted her and explained why I couldn't take it any longer and that it was over. We're two different persons with different interests and views, so naturally it just doesn't work out, and I want out. So I plain out told her, and now she refuses to accept it. She says that she is willing to work it out and that we can get together, and to which I respond that it really isn't her decision and if I don't want to be together we're not together. You cant have a relationship where only 1 person really wants it. As simple as that. So what do I do? What do I tell her?", "summary": "Girlfriend of 1 year refuses to accept that it's over. What do I tell her? What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1rxhco", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Help! Photography dilemma!", "post": "Sorry for the wall of text......\n\nMy fiance and I are on a budget.  The most we can spend on photography is $1,500, but our main concern is just to get good ceremony shots and a few good shots to hang on our wall.\n\nI found one photographer in our area that is pretty new to the biz.  He and his assistant will do an engagement shoot and an entire wedding day of photos for $1,200 (getting ready - cake cutting). We like his photographs, they would be good and acceptable. I have been talking to him, and think we would get along pretty well.\n\nMy sister recommended a different photographer, a woman she had previously worked with.  Her photos are AMAZING, and have recently been featured in style me pretty and other such blogs.  Her normal package is $2,900 for an engagement shoot, herself & an assistant, all day photos, and 200 4x6 prints.  I've been talking to her today (she's doing a $500 off cyber Monday deal), and she could get it down to $1,500 - this would cut out the second shooter and the prints. \n\nI'd jump on the second photographer immediately, but my fiance seems to be excited at the thought of having getting ready photos (he originally didn't care, but after thinking he COULD have it, he started to like it).  I'm also not sure if not having a second photographer would be a big mistake!", "summary": "Is it worth it for the guys to have their own getting ready shots, and is having a second photographer a really good thing?"}
{"id": "t3_4ozvws", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is my friend [20/f] a cleptomaniac?", "post": "I [23/f] have known here for quite a while and this is something particularly that I dislike about her. She is really dear to me but knowing these parts makes me feel unpleasant in her surroundings. Whenever she travells, she comes back with bunch of stuff such as shirts, earrings, bracelets, shorts and all the stuff you could put in your bag. The other day she asked me if I wanted to go with her in chinese shopping mall and steal stuff for summer, I said yes just to avoid further asking because I needed to think about it. I never really stole anything and that is not what my parents taught me. I just dont support it at all, especially if its material stuff that im stealing. If I have to steal one necklace, I don't even need it at all, it would always remind me of the bad ''small krime'' i did. However, today she came back from short trip with her friends in nearby village, with a really nice necklace and I asked her where did she find it since it really looks appealing to me and also, my style. She said, with such a nonchalance, that she stole it in an open-air store. That was the moment where I thought ''Why do you keep doing it''.\n\nShe comes from pretty nice and harmonic family, she is a student and we all live in a students dorm. Her parents send her enough money for food and I guess she could always ask them for more money.\n\nDo you, dear redditors, consider her a cleptomaniac? What are the causes?", "summary": "My really good friend is often stealing stuff and I am worried if she was cleptomaniac and also, i feel like i might can't trust her anymore as I used to."}
{"id": "t3_17buud", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (m19) can't stop comparing my new SO (18) with my ex (22).", "post": "The title says it all, my ex was the only girl I ever loved. we were together on and off for 8 months. She loved me , I loved her, we broke up for good about 2 months ago, I started seeing a new girl and have had sex with her, she is pretty, but opposite of my ex, where as my ex is Asian, my new SO is strong italian blooded.\n\nEverything I do with my SO I mentally compare to my ex, the hugs, the kisses, the hand holding, and the sex, both girls are vastly diffrent down there, my ex having larger lips, where as my new SO is much tighter.\n\nIt is just killing me, because I shouldnt be mentally comparing anyone to my ex. And I just dont know how to stop it? Even when I think I got over it, it still lies dormant in my mind and sometimes I cant enjoy time with my SO (whether it be sex or just chilling and cuddeling) because I just compare it to my ex.... Yes I belive my new SO could be just a rebound but at the same time I really do like her. Any ideas on how to resolve this? Me and my ex are currently not even speaking anymore as of last week.", "summary": "Broken up with my ex of on again off again 8 months, dating a new girl and cant stop mentally comparing everything with her to my ex. Any tips with how to deal with this?"}
{"id": "t3_2g92d2", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me [18m] and my girlfriend [17f] are looking at the same college, could we stay together?", "post": "I know lots of people will the title and think I'm considering continuing our relationship after high school, into college. This isn't entirely true however. Here are the details. \n\nOne of the colleges on my list is a fairly close but competitive state school. I have already applied and expect to be accepted under automatic acceptance rules. She went on a day visit recently with a close friend, and stated she likes the campus a lot. However, she is paying for her college herself, so her plan is to attend community college for a year as a cheaper way to complete some prerequisites.\n\nWhile I absolutely love being with her, and couldn't be happier with our relationship, as seniors I expect the worse come graduation, when we go our separate ways. I have heard that it is a drag socially to freshman who try to hang on to their significant others at different schools. But suppose the two in the relationship both end up choosing the same school, for reasons outside of the relationship, would it be feasible to try to stay together? I know this is far down the road, a lot could happen in between now and then, and like I said she would be at community college for a year and I wouldn't see her for that time. But I'm curious to know if anybody has succeeded in this.", "summary": "Me and my girlfriend have a slim possibility of ending up at the same college. Could we keep dating, or is it a bad idea socially?"}
{"id": "t3_3m0axw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21/F] having a hard time maintaining friendships. I think I forgot how to have friends?", "post": "Hi r/relationships! \n\nI am a 21 year old female and ever since leaving high school, I feel like it has become impossible for me to keep friendships. Up until age 16/17 I was generally liked in school and had a few extremely close friends. I was loud, childish and loving life. Unfortunately I developed mental issues (I'm bipolar) and scared/pushed most of them away for many different reasons. After getting treatment and leaving for university (age 19) I decided to have a fresh start. New city, new friends right? But since then, I struggle.\n\nI do have acquaintances at uni, even some girls that you could call friends. But I am missing these intense friendships from school, people I could completely trust, where I could just let myself go and have fun.. basically some best friends.\n\nI am generally liked on my course but I do think most people see me as very serious, too mature, too stiff... People I hang out with often say how \"middle aged\" I am. Which is fine because I guess it is true and it has its reasons. I would love to be less serious and enjoy life more spontaneously but it scares me and reminds me of some horrible manic things I did. \n\nIt is hard to sum this up to some precise questions but basically I'd like to know what I can change in order to find true friendship again? How can I let go of my fears and find a middle ground between crazy outgoing and lonely hermit? And this last one just came to me in the process of writing: I've dropped many things that were \"classic me\" and all that's left is this weird middle aged career-driven me. Do I need to find myself/my passions first before I can go and find people that could be my good friends?", "summary": "I was a loud obnoxious kid in school, got treated for bipolar and moved away. I've become a quiet old lady and have no close friends. How do I change that?"}
{"id": "t3_2b9p2k", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My [20/m] Girlfriend [22/f] might not get into the grad school she wants to.", "post": "Basically, my girlfriend might not be able to get into her desired grad school due to certain academic and financial complications. She has one or two courses with an undesirable grade, and wants to retake those courses. But with college tuition costing as much as it does today, it's putting her in a difficult position because she can't retake the courses for an improved grade. I honestly wish that I could help her out and pay for everything, but I have my own increasing tuition fees to cover plus housing.\n\nI'm trying to support her and help her through this the best I can, but it just seems like there isn't much I can do... Or at least, none comes to my mind. This is pretty major source of stress and unhappiness right now, for the both of us. She's been crying about it almost every night, she's also become irritable and somewhat cold and detached. I've been giving her more space, and just being there when she needs me. But I can't help feeling extremely useless and helpless right now, and it's probably one of the worst feelings I've ever experienced. Is there anything I can do to make things a little easier, ease the stress a bit. I just want to see her smile again...", "summary": "Girlfriend is worried she won't get into grad school, extremely stressed out. I want to help in all ways possible, but it seems like there just isn't a lot that I can do for her."}
{"id": "t3_2y2463", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me and my wife [30 M,F] with my parents [60's M,F] are spoiling our baby (8 months) and won't listen to our parenting plan/rules", "post": "We are all from a different country living in the USA. So when my dad actually found a job here my parent's moved with us (it was less demanding, only 3 days a week). They thought it would be good as my wife was pregnant and they could help out. They would've come here for a few months to help out anyway but this seemed to work out very well. \nNow they have been here 2 years and while everything else seems to go smoothly we seem to clash a lot on parenting methods and rules. They always carry the baby around the house don't let him play on the floor, pick him up when he cries, do not let us try things out such as baby led weaning etc. We are having a lot of arguments in the last few months because of that. I am not sure how to handle this.\n\nI don't really want to ask them to move out as it it considered disrespectful in our culture. We moved into a big house after they came and it would also put a small financial stress on both parties. My wife would also have to quit her job that she just started (it's non-paid and she is just doing it for work experience) if my parents left so she can train him for a couple months before leaving him in daycare. I wish there was a better solution but it seems to be the only thing I can think of now.", "summary": "My parents who are living with my wife and I, do not listen to our rules and ideas of how to raise our baby."}
{"id": "t3_h4130", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit you're my only hope.  How does one remove  years-old cum stains from painted drywall?", "post": "So backstory...\n\nWhen I was a teenager and masturbation was just becoming a regular thing for me (about 8 years ago), I used to do so in bed all the time.  My comforter made this nice ridge along the outside of my mattress so I could come on the other side of it and let it dry there without having to worry about rolling over in it or anything.  Our family's maid washed the sheets once a week, and since I wasn't doing this every night, I figured I was leaving no trace.\n\nTurns out I was wrong.\n\nI should mention here that I slept in a bunk bed, on the top bunk.  There was no one sleeping on bottom, I just liked sleeping up there.  In any case, when I was in high school, long after I'd moved on from masturbating in bed, I noticed some stains on the wall when I was in the bottom bunk reading.  It looked like someone had dribbled coke or something on the wall and the syrup had dried into these little browning streaks.  I couldn't see their origins, but it was clear they'd come from above.  I investigated and found several impact sites, unmistakably wrought by my pubescent self-exploration.\n\nI freaked out a little and tried scrubbing them off, but when that didn't work I realized that it probably wouldn't ever matter; no one ever had any reason to get close enough to this wall in my room to notice and I doubted my family would ever have a need to move the bed, thereby discovering my embarrassing secret.  I turned out to be wrong about that too.\n\nI'm at college now, and my mom recently informed me they're redoing the carpet in my old room this summer.  That means they're definitely going to find it.  I'm going back to house-sit next weekend though;  my family will be gone.  It's just gonna be me and whatever cleaning methods you guys can come up with.", "summary": "Blew my load (a lot) on the wall as a kid (inadvertently), now my parents are going to find it if I don't clean it*"}
{"id": "t3_42e0if", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "10+ yrs of relationship, 2 kids. Trust?", "post": "First time on here. I (m28) with my girlfriend (f28) for 10yrs+. We broke up for about a year a couple of years back (1 kid at this stage) obviously both went off on the single scene.\n\nWe got back together and had another kid together. Recently I found out she was with a guy that she worked with years ago. They had been \"friends\" and texting each other on and off over the years. But when  we weren't together she ended up sleeping with this guy. He had a girlfriend at the time, think he still does.\n\nI recently confronted my partner about this and she told me that she didn't see any harm in texting him when we were together originally because \"nothing happened\". I'm finding it hard to believe that a guy would keep interest after 8 yrs (when they originally met) if he wasn't getting anywhere (unless they were just friends)\n\nUsually if this was one of my friends in this situation, I'd say fuck her. But the problem is we have 2 children and I can't bear the thought of not seeing them everyday. Or them growing up in a broken home.\n\nI don't know whether to believe what she is telling me or what to do. I can't think properly about the whole situation, I'm lost! \n\nTo make it worse, I found out where the guy lives and the temptention to fuck him up is going through my head. Have thought about finding his girlfriend and telling her. (They have been in a longterm relationship aswell as far as I know)\n\nSorry if this read seems a bit all over the place but I've never had to do anything like this before. Any advice would be great", "summary": "Don't know if I can trust longterm girlfriend, worried about leaving my 2 kids. my head is in a bad place, need advice plz"}
{"id": "t3_1gpdml", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I feel so great. I just got over a past relationship in the least likely possible way.", "post": "So I broke up with my SO about 4 months ago - it was the cleanest possible breakup, due entirely to conflicting schedules and lack of time, so there was really no impetus for me to move on. We tried to be friends afterward and did our best, but communication quickly tapered off. I assumed from the lack of emotions I was feeling toward her and the lack of communication that I was getting over her.\n\nThen this week she visited my city.\n\nShe invited a bunch of our old friends (and myself) out for dinner, so I figured, sure, why not, let's cement her status as a friend. This will be casual enough.\n\nAnd it was. We had a great time, laughed like crazy, and found ourselves finishing each other's sentences like we did when we first fell for each other. It was a really fun night, closed with a loving goodbye hug.\n\nI say loving because the second I go, reality smacked me in the face. I was still in love with her, just as much as when I broke up with her. I spent the night brooding over it, and decided that the best course of action was to be blunt about it. I texted her the next day telling her in fairly simple terms what the night had done for me - it made me realize I was still head over heels for her.\n\nAnd she never responded.\n\nI'm entirely okay with that. Hell, I'm happy about that. It put things into perspective. Four months of acting like I was okay with being friends with a girl I never even had the chance to see that way wore on me. I realized how much self-respect I was abandoning just by keeping up this charade and allowing her to be how I validated myself.\n\nAnd, honestly? Fuck that. I'm awesome, and I don't need her to tell me that to know it. I feel like I've lifted a weight from my shoulders, and for the first time in four months I'm genuinely happy to be single. For the first time in four months I feel like a man instead of a teenager. I'm free from love because I told her I loved her.", "summary": "Got over my ex because I told her I still loved her months later, realized how much of an idiot I was being, and am breathing the free air once more."}
{"id": "t3_1wsx0h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm(f/17) crazy in love, but how to explain this to my family?", "post": "Hi Reddit, I need your help!\n\nJust a few weeks ago I met this guy(m/23) and we had this 'click' right from the start. I was at a small party and I met him there. I was the youngest, I knew, everyone called me a 'jailbait' so I knew everyone was at least 1 or 2 years older than me.\n\nI had come there because a good girl friend of mine(f/20) asked me to come, and said it would be fun. I didn't want to go at first, but she begged me to, so I thought I'd just go to make her happy.\n\nThe guy I met and I talked for hours straight. When the party was over and I was back home again, we continued whatsapping, facebooking and skyping for hours nonstop. We have so much in common - we say the same things at the same time, we feel the same way about basically everything!\n\nNow, I have two problems here. First one is, that the girl that wanted me to come to the party, is a lesbian, I never thought anything of it - but apparently she's fallen in love with me. She is one of my closest friends. How do I politely tell her that I'm not going to date her? She's pushing me into it, I've been with a girl once for 4 months or so, but she knows that I'm not into girls anymore, but I guess she thinks she can force me into becoming a lesbian. At least, that's what it feels like.\n\nSecond, I really like the guy. I found out he was 23 later because he was ashamed of his age at first. We didn't really mention it at first because we just didn't think about it - we all knew I'm a 'jailbait' and I knew he had to be at least 18 or older, apparently our age difference is 6 years. I'm stressing over it. \n\nFor Valentines day he's going to take me out. I'm really excited for it and if we have the same click again, I think we will become a couple. Just... How do I tell my mom?", "summary": "Raging pushy lesbian tries to turn me into one, I've fallen in love with a dude 6 years older than me, who's basically my soulmate. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_118h2d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[25M] Falling out of love with my GF 25[F], we have lived together for six months, how do I break up with someone I live with?(2yrs)", "post": "Alright,  me and my gf have been living with each other for about six months and been dating for 2 years roughly. My name is the only one on the lease and I am the bread winner at the moment. My gf moved about 30 miles away from home to live where I am.\n\nNow to get to the nitty gritty.\nRecently I have been becoming less and less attracted to my gf. She put on a good amount of weight in a short amount if time, now usually this wouldn't bother me all too much. However, when coupled with her lack of \"drive\" in life the unattractiveness doubles. She doesn't seem too interested in advancing into some type of job with benefits and is comfortable with working her low wage-10 to15 hour workweek. \n\nSecondly there are huge issues with my family and her, now unfortunately I'm on my phone so I'll make it short, she is not interested in mending problems with my family members that have occurred in the past year or so. These unmended problems cause a bit of stress for me and have actually strained relationships with family members of my own.  \n\nHow can I break up with gf of two years? When she lives in my apartment, the majority of the possessions in the apartment are mine. She owns the decorations,  the bed, and various knickknacks. I own the electronics , couches, bureaus, etc.,", "summary": "unattracted with gf, wish to break up, my name is on lease most possessions are mine, she has no car, how do I break up!?"}
{"id": "t3_1pe330", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "If you were starting a local non-profit which would provide middle-school-aged kids a place to learn basic programming after school(HTML, CSS, Javascript, etc.), what would you name it? (a.k.a - we're starting one and need a name!)", "post": "As you have more than likely deduced from the title(for the love of God I hope you did at least), we are starting a new non-profit in South FL. Our goal is to provide middle-school-aged kids from our area a place they can come after school a few days a week(we will have schedules for ages/classes) and learn the basics of web/mobile design and programming(and intermediate classes as well).\n\nOur number one goal is to provide this for free to kids in low-income households, heck even families making 60k a year in South FL still cannot afford more than a small 2 bedroom apartment with the cost of living down here, forget about the cost of sending your kid to get programming lessons. We will have a small fee for kids whose families can afford it (our initial thought is around $100 a month).\n\nWe already have a location central to the schools in our area, and easy to get to from anywhere. We are working on getting the necessary licenses and completing the needed paperwork... and here is where we need our name.\n\nThe foreseeable future will be digital and children who can get a head start in learning the basics of programming and web/mobile design will have a distinct advantage as they continue to grow into productive members of our society. We want to provide an avenue that would not be available to these kids otherwise--many of which do not even have a computer or the internet at home. If they can get a head start, they can improve their situation in life, and maybe they will have an idea they bring to fruition that improves the lives of people everywhere... that's our dream at least.", "summary": "Reddit, our new non-profit needs a name--please help us, or live the rest of your life in a miserable guilt ridden existence."}
{"id": "t3_19nrro", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Some advice for an inexperienced 17 year old male needed.", "post": "Ok so here's the situation.I went to this fancy dress party last friday with a friend and some girlfriends(platonic) and met the girl[also 17] in question , shes friends with my buddy.So we talked a bit there , she payed quite a bit of attention to me throughout the event and asked me for my facebook username which i gave her.So she added me on facebook , needless to say i accepted , we talked quite a lot firstly just about general stuff but i had a hunch she liked me.So yesterday night she asks me if i have anything going on relationship wise and i said that i'm not in a relationship but have someone on my mind and she actually asked who she knew her and offered to talk to her(i'm pretty sure that's weird or is that just me) i kindly declined.And today(monday) while chatting(light flirting) she asks me maybe i'm actually into her and not the other girl, i was kinda surprised and replied by saying we should go out some time and see.\n\n * So now to the actual questions: Did i handle it well in general? Should i go out with her?(I guess i have nothing to lose right?) keep in mind she is generally attractive physically but i don't feel like i know enough about her. What is your general opinion on how she behaved after her knowing i was into someone else.\n \n* Note i have little to no experience with relationships so anything is helpful! Thanks in advance.", "summary": "Met a girl a few days ago she hit me up on facebook seems interested should i follow up?But please read above for a better perspective."}
{"id": "t3_3gd2me", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] and my ex [21M] are going travelling together in three weeks...am I overthinking things?", "post": "For some backstory, I lived on campus for uni. My ex ended up moving in next door to me and we quickly became really close. He was on exchange for a year from a university in England, and we hit it off FAST.\n\nBecause of the fact that our units were next to each other, we ended up living together. We cooked together, stayed together every night, studied together etc. But we knew that he would be have to go back to England to complete his Masters. We discussed this early into the relationship, and decided on a mutual breakup for when he leaves. At the time I thought, \"yeah, I can handle this. I have a lot of time to prepare, we'll just enjoy this while it lasts.\"\nI was very wrong. We fell so in love with one another, and he became my best friend. He's been back in England for almost two months now, but we still talk like we are a couple, and we ended up planning a trip together. In about three weeks, I am going to England for two weeks to travel with him (his suggestion, but we had both talked about it before)\n\nI'm not really sure how to approach the time in between, before I go to England. We act like a couple, skyping/messaging (he recently sent me a letter telling me he loved me and a handmade bookmark from a tree in his garden) but we haven't explicitly talked about what this is. \n\nI mean, I don't know if we are casually seeing other people? Just the other night he said he was meeting a female friend to catch up, but he messaged me when he got home and that was almost 5 am his time and kind of left a bad taste in my mouth, because I automatically assumed things, despite how every other day he tells me he misses me and talks about all the things he is planning for when I am there.  \n\nDo I wait until I'm there to have that conversation about what this is? I know communication is absolutely key, but I don't want to risk awkwardness/disappointment before going there, and sometimes things are miss-communicated when not talking face to face.\nAdvice?", "summary": "met english guy, fell in love, broke up because he moved back, now we are going to travel together and I don't know what to do about the time in between."}
{"id": "t3_1wrc83", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25F] got left behind by my [24F] SO for no reason.", "post": "First time ever submitting, I just need some extra advice on this!\n\nI dated this girl, let's call her C, for about a year. We never made things official but we were loyal to each other (as far as I know...). Things were amazing, we went out a lot, never fought, and had great chemistry. Then it all ended.\n\nShe was having family and work issues so things weren't too great at her home. She was being distant and I knew something wasn't right. I get a text from her saying how she thinks it's best for us to be friends \"for now\" because too much was going on and she couldn't handle dating. I completely understood and figured I should support her. But things just got really messy afterwards. \n\nI would find out she'd be talking to other girls, flirting and even opened up her dating profile again. I felt like she was trying to move on and meet new people. She kept insisting that she wasn't looking for anything but her actions showed otherwise. I even found out that she ended up hooking up with a friend she visited on the East coast, this was while we were still sort of hooking up too.\n\nI asked her what exactly happened between us, if I did anything wrong because it was just so sudden. She kept insisting that I did nothing wrong. I was amazing to her, treated her amazingly and it was nothing against me. I can't wrap my head around that. She's told me I'm everything she looks for in a SO but yet it was so easy for her to just leave. \n\nWe had stopped talking because she ended up getting back together with her ex (before me). None of her actions make sense to me. She keeps insisting I did nothing wrong but I can't help but feel like something must've happened. I think me not knowing makes it harder to let her go. We are talking again, sort of, but I just don't know what to do, or think.", "summary": "SO left me after a year, didn't give me a real reason why, says I'm everything she wants in a girlfriend but only sees me as a friend."}
{"id": "t3_2r37yb", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Are scholarships and grants awarded per semester or year?", "post": "I am starting my third semester of college soon and do not quite understand how grants/scholarships work.\n\nMy first was in the previous academic school year over the summer and I just completed my second at the start of the current academic year.\n\nFrom what I've read online it sounds like scholarships and grants are awarded one time a year, but are split up into two parts and refunded to you in those parts at the start of each semester.\n\nSo I got ~$2,500 from just the Pell Grant last semester(which went straight into my bank because scholarships pay for it all), does that mean ill get another check of ~$2,500 at the start of this upcoming semester or was that first check all i get for the year? The wording on the sites for these grants is a little strange.", "summary": "Are grants split into 2 parts and given to me at separate times throughout the academic year or is all of it given at the start?"}
{"id": "t3_13rpku", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How many of you search for jobs and opportunities daily until you feel sick?", "post": "I have been doing tons of job searching lately with the rest of my graduating peers and I am noticing we all have the same issue. We research job sites until we are just strung out on stress. Some sites are truly better than others are, but for the most part, they lack the one thing we are all looking for a direct connection to hope.\n\nI want to start a website just for people to post their background education/training/other, their current job, their job search process sites/interviews/etc, how they feel they got their job, and etc. Distill down the actual details of what a candidate similar to the one who posted their experience can expect to fair. There is just too much voodoo job-hunting out there. People can post if the entry-level position they applied to really wanted 5 years of experience or if they walked in fresh faced and were told not to worry. I want a site for average people seeking employment to come and find out the truth. My wife even says that further down the road we could integrate connections where you can offer to mentor a certain number of similarly people to yourself and help them enter into jobs at your company or others that may be of the same industry.\n\nThere is just too much BS out there and people are getting sick of it. I want to make a job site by the people and for the people.\n\nIs there a site like this? In addition, if I just small budget it and build it in wordpress or phpbb will people come? How should I lay it out?\n\nI really want to help people because I do not like the suffering going on right now.", "summary": "People are suffering and breaking down in the current rotten job search machine. I want to help them. Will my help be accepted and utilized?"}
{"id": "t3_51icvr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (22M), just got out of a 2 year relationship where I lived with her (20f) for pretty much the entire time, went on a few dates, don't know how to feel anymore?", "post": "She left about a month and a half ago then I went away on orders with the army. Ever since I've gotten home to the empty house though everything feels completely empty. I got used to living with her, then the boys when I was with the army, and now it's like nothing. I only got one local friend left cause the rest moved away and so it kinda just piled up on me. So anyway, I went on a date today, and I've gone on a few others but I feel nothing towards these girls, almost like I'm numb. I'm not sure if I'm just emotionally overwhelmed or if this is normal? I feel completely lost lol and I'm not too sure where to turn or if this is normal and I just need to power through it?", "summary": "got out of a 2 yr live in relationship and I feel completely lost. Gone on a few dates but felt absolutely nothing. Is this feeling normal?"}
{"id": "t3_3z1wtc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [25m] approach my sister [23f] about dating her friend [24f]?", "post": "I am looking for advice on how I should approach my sister about dating one of her good friends. I am not looking for an opinion on whether or not it's a good idea. \n\nMyself and said female spent some time together recently (innocently) and have seemed to have hit it off. We are both obviously attracted to one another and interested in seeing where things go. She is one of my sister's very good friends and I don't want to move forward without her blessing. Does anyone have any advice on how I can approach my sister about moving forward with hanging out with this girl on a more personal level?", "summary": "Hit it off with my sister's good friend. Interested in pursuing. Need advice on asking my sister for her blessing."}
{"id": "t3_h5cad", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Question about Fair Use related to using copyrighted music. Can I use this music in a video that I make for the purposes of reviewing/ commenting on said music? (Re-post from self.AskAcademia)", "post": "I am just starting a website for a project I am doing where I am listening to music albums that I normally wouldn't listen to and trying to appreciate them, and basically doing a review of what I thought of them, if I liked them, etc. Doing this to expand my music library, practice writing reviews, learn about different types of music, and just to have fun. Since I'm not really that familiar with Fair Use Laws in the USA, my question is this: Can I use portions of the music from the albums I listen to in a \"video review,\" type thing? What is or is not Fair Use in this type of situation? Any knowledge on Fair Use is appreciated. I'm finding limited information out there, but I know there are people in the Reddit community who know this stuff so I'm putting it out there. Come on Reddit! Will you help me out?", "summary": "See title -OR- Looking for any information on Fair Use related to using Copyrighted Music in a \"Video Review,\" type video."}
{"id": "t3_3r40xj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 F] with my girlfriend [29 F] 15 months, is it right to breakup because I still am not over my ex and I know it hurts her?", "post": "I've been with her a little over a year. She's gorgeous, she's amazingly supportive. I love her. I'm 1000% sure of that. The problem is, I'm not sure I'm IN love with her. I love her SO much that I want to make sure I do what's best for her. I've hurt her a lot during our relationship without ever meaning to, simply because when we met, I was not with my ex anymore but still in love with my ex ( pronouns are hard with a lot of \"hers\", so I'll try to stick to \"her\" for my current girlfriend and use \"my ex\" otherwise). But I was very into her and tried to move on with her. But it's been, as I mentioned, a year and a half and I still am not entirely over my ex, to a degree I can't even hide. I just am sad a lot. Or I bring my ex up in conversation despite trying to remember not to (we were together for a long time, 7 years). And I know it hurts her. But the only alternative is to hide it, which feels extremely insincere. I can't even tell if it will ever get better or go away. How can I stop hurting her? I want to, but I don't feel like I can even trust my own healing process here. Is the only right thing to do to leave her and be alone and... just wait until I get back to neutral?\nI hate that my last relationship feels like it's poisoning my current one.", "summary": "How do I get over my ex enough to be with this new person? Does the fact that I struggle with this, on its own, mean I should leave her?"}
{"id": "t3_53dpvb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (F39) mum (F67) is very mean to me and my husband (M37) about our career choices.", "post": "My mother has always been a mixed bag. She's borderline mean a lot but I don't want to cut her out... When i was 18 I decided instead of going to law school like my mum wanted me to I went to study to become a teacher. ( I now am a teacher) ever since then she constantly berates me that I \"can do better\" and that I'm going to be poor (even though I have a masters degree-meaning I get paid more then most teachers) she also says \"I'm wasting my life\" and that she \"raised me to be successful, not babysit kids\" she also is mean to my husband who is a teacher-librarian at a elementary school ( I teach high school) she says \" I could have married a more successful man if I wanted to\" it makes me so so fucking sad. I've considered cutting off contact with her but my son loves her ( and she's very good and nice and awesome) with my son. Just not me and my husband.. I don't know what to do...", "summary": "my mum is mean to me and my husband but super nice to my son. I have no clue what to do."}
{"id": "t3_22n0qc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [26/m] am worried I don't love her [26/f] enough", "post": "The other night, my gf (26) told me (26m) she doesn't feel like we spend enough time together, and that she doesn't feel that she's very high on my list of priorities.\n\nThe trouble is, I'm somewhere in the middle. I'm not head-over-heels in love with her; she's not dwelling in my every thought. But I do love her; I think she is a wonderful person. I enjoy spending time around her. I want to make her happy and make her feel as special as she makes me feel. But I'm also incredibly busy. I also deeply cherish my alone time. I pretty much constantly feel like I'm running around. \n\nStill, I've made sure to have some manner of dedicated date night each week, as well as a night or two where we stay together or tag along to one another's functions/events/shows/gatherings. On average, I'd say we see one another three times a week.\n\nEven more frustrating is that she often outright rejects some of the nice things I try to say. She'll cringe or roll her eyes when I compliment her, and even the other night said she didn't believe me when I said I'd been looking forward to seeing her all day. At first, it was kind of sweetly self-effacing, but I'm starting to feel undercut, like I'm just fighting this uphill battle to let her know she's special to me. \n\nWriting this out, it sounds like she's in the wrong, but I truly feel guilty about how disproportionate our relationship is. I think I am making an effort, and I do nice things and try to show that I'm thinking of her, but I'm still constantly aware of how much more she likes me and how much more invested she seems in the relationship than I am.\n\nI know this is kinda a lot of stuff with no concrete issue and a lot going on at once; any insight would be appreciated.", "summary": "I love her, but she, like *loves* me, and now I'm worried I'm hurting her."}
{"id": "t3_u9uzs", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redditors that have received an OWI, what's your story?", "post": "First off, I'm not bragging about anything, and I'm very disappointed in myself and learned my lesson. I was 18 years old in high school, and we had a snow day from school. My buddies called me and said \"let's drink, my parents are at work and I want to have beer cracked by noon\", so I said let's do it. It was a Wednesday. I had to work at 4:00, but figured I'd have a couple. I was young and dumb, and ended up getting completely hammered playing minefield all afternoon (a game consisting of a lot of drinking). I don't know why I did it but I kept drinking, and left my friends house at 3:30. On my way to work, I dropped my ipod on the floor while changing the song and began deviating into the lane next to me, thank god nobody was around, except for the police officer behind me who immediately pulled me over. He came up to the car and could smell the alcohol immediately, and the entire process for the DUI began there (sobriety test, cuffed up and put in the back of the cop car and brought to the hospital for a blood test). My father picked me up with a cigar in his mouth, a month after he had quit smoking. When I asked why he was smoking, he responded \"You made me\", the utmost disappointment I've ever experienced in my life. I learned my lesson and it'll never happen again. Everybody in school heard about it, and I had to call my boss to tell him I wasn't making it to work, and for some reason or another he didn't fire me, and I can't imagine what would have happened if he had since I had this hefty fine, alcohol assessment and class, ridiculously high car insurance and towing fees to pay. I'm extremely thankful I didn't hurt anybody and I learned my lesson when I was young.", "summary": "I got a DUI at the age of 18 on the way to work at 4 in the afternoon on a Wednesday, lesson learned."}
{"id": "t3_3gixkg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[13M] My grandmother [56F] recently started smoking after already having quit years ago, trying to make her stop.", "post": "My grandmother (whom I live with, if that's important at all), a very interesting lady, has recently started smoking again. For about a year or two she didn't smoke, which ironically enough she decided to do herself, and as far as I know, she quit cold turkey.\n\nRecently, however, she's taken it up as a habit again, and I'm really worried for her health. I've learned many of times about all of the harmful effects that cigarettes have on your body, and my grandmother has already beat cancer once (when I was too young to remember) and I really don't want to have to endure that again.\n\nShe always smokes out on our front porch, so it's relatively easy to catch her smoking when I'm around the house, but I start school in a few days and I know she'll use that time to smoke when I'm not home. Even when I am around, she gets really mad whenever I catch her. Apparently, me forcing her to put out the cigarette and lecturing her about how she can die is not enough to make her quit like she did before.\n\nIs there anything I can do to make her stop? I'm really worried that she could get ill, and I'm not really at a position where I'm ready to lose another parent. (referring to my biological parents, my grandfather is still around but only on the weekends and is seemingly okay with the smoking)", "summary": "My grandmother recently started smoking again after a few years of being clean. Trying to convince her to stop, but she's too stubborn to listen to anything I say."}
{"id": "t3_3cfm9n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (21F) boyfriend(27M) of just over a year joined a social/dating website a month ago. I don't know what to do.", "post": "Ok, so I know my boyfriend has a fetish for thicker, curvy women and with round stomachs (pregnant included). At first I wasn't too worried about it because everyone has things they're into but I'm a slender girl and always have been. \n\nJust this morning, I saw an email pop up on his screen for a social/dating site called Feabie and the email was for account activation... and he did activate it last month according to the welcome invite. \n\nI automatically feel betrayed and angry, why would he need to join a social/dating site of any nature? I'm not comfortable with the fact that he's most likely on there to get off or make new 'friends'. \n\nI don't want to appear like I was snooping, because I wasn't, it just popped up on the screen. But I also feel I need to address this because it's already starting to brew negative feelings towards him. He makes comments way too often about how much he dislikes fat, and how he wouldn't date a fat girl but here he is on a new \"feeding\" social/dating site... wtf?", "summary": "BF has fetish for round stomachs/curvy/thick women. He recently joined a social/ dating website for this. Should I be angry or concerned? How do I talk to him about this?"}
{"id": "t3_23m9va", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21M] still cannot get over my ex from a year ago and am in a relationship with someone else", "post": "So i'll try and keep this short.  Last year I met the girl of my dreams, she was the only girl in my entire life I legitimately enjoyed talking to, and would use any excuse I could to do so.  We went out for a bit and it was amazing at first but I was so head over heels I said and did some really embaressing things, got clingy and made an idiot of myself like I had no idea I was capable of.  Looking back I would have broke up with me too I looked like a nutcase.  Fast forward a year later, I've been seeing this girl for a little over 3 months and I can tell things are getting serious from her end.  And while I really liked her at first and enjoy being with her, along with everything that comes with it, I still can't get past my ex.  Everything she does I just remember how my ex did it and how much more in tune I was with it.  Everything she did just made so much sense to me, and this one (even though she is great and I am happy with the time I've spent with her) just doesn't make me feel that way.  \n\nHow can I get some closure on this? I'm not sure if I'm not interested in her or if it is just a barrier I'm putting up due to not getting over my ex.", "summary": "can't get over my ex, in a happy, healthy relationship but don't ever feel the way about her that I did for my ex"}
{"id": "t3_2ltzfc", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by dating a crazy.", "post": "As usual, this did not happen today, or even this year. Probably was about 4 years ago, making me around 15.\nI'd been dating this girl (let's call her Emma) on and off for about a year, and by nature of being a stupid 15 year old male, didn't decide to bail permanently during any of the previous breakups.\n\nSo about a month after we get back together once more, I'm at her house, hanging with her and a pair of mutual friends.\nOne of these friends decides to make what he decided was a hilarious comment comparing the nearby beach to the wet spot that had developed on her whilst sitting on my lap.\n\nI laughed.\n\nShe promptly decided to hop up, and walk into the kitchen. Nothing unusual yet, so I'm sitting talking about stupid teenage stuff with my friend, whilst her friend has gone to check on her in the kitchen. They've been in there for a while when my friend decided he's gonna leave, and so I'm left alone, which suits me fine because my teenage brain is hoping I'll get time alone with Emma.\n\nAbout a minute later, Emma emerges with a butchers knife and a smile. It was not a great combination. Her friend is in the hallway behind her, she's watching in a bit of shocked horror. Sensing that my welcome had run out, I stood up, at which point Emma announced she was going to castrate me as a punishment for being a horny teenager.\n\nThe following few moments of my comprehension of the statement and my rapid running the fuck away from her passed very quickly, and in my rush I took a wrong turn and ended up in a linen closet. Fuck.\n\nTurns out that as she was chasing me, her friend tried to grab her arm, got nicked by the knife, and went into shock.\nEmma breaks out of crazy mode and calls out for help. Apparently her protective instincts only extend to her female friends.\n\nAnyway, I end up consoling her friend whilst we wait for her mum to arrive and drive her to the hospital on the pretext of a cooking accident with knives.\n\nNow heres where it gets really bad. I still dated her for another year or so.", "summary": "dated a crazy, MY friend unintentionally set her against me, she chases me with knife, cuts HER friend, I have to act as councilor because she's in shock. Still didn't break up with crazy."}
{"id": "t3_25l9o9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my GF [19F] 4 years, Help me look ahead", "post": "I have been in love with this girl for a number of years, we have a really strong history together. We've been friends since the 8th grade, dating since early highschool. But we've grown together, she was there through my moms alcoholism, I was there for her emotionally abusive mother. She dealt with my religious turmoil, I dealt with her trust issues. We've even broken up, dated other people, and concluded that we simply prefer each other over the rest of the population. It's so corny and cliche that we were each others first kiss, first love, first lovers. I'd gag if I wasn't so in love with her. Anyway, I feel a little in over my head. \n\nI'm worried i'm not equipped to handle a relationship of this caliber. I have no doubts regarding my commitment to her or whether we are right for each other, I'm just worried that I'll be young and dumb and muck it up. Am I worrying for nothing? Are there common mistakes that people make in the transition to long term relationships?", "summary": "We've drug each other through some shit, still love each other, how will I fuck it up if I fuck it up?"}
{"id": "t3_4hc0xw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [16M] try to get back together with my ex [16F]?", "post": "First time posting here, sorry if I screwed something up.\n\nAbout a year ago my girlfriend of roughly 6 months broke up with me. It wasn't the perfect relationship. We both made mistakes, but I really loved her.\n\nA few weeks before the breakup she started being very distant and quiet. I tried talking to her, but she just never wanted to say anything to me. She just shut down whenever I tried to talk to her.\n\nThe breakup was nothing noteworthy. She just walked up to me one day, said she was done with it, and left. It really broke me down and I spent a very long time moping.\n\nThe following months were summer vacation, so we didn't have much contact and I just went around being sad. \n\nThe first few months of school were really tough for me because we have many mutual friends and classes so we saw each other a lot. The only contact we had were occasional glances and uncomfortable conversations between classes.\n\nThen she started dating one of my close friends. Seeing her move on really hurt, but I knew I couldn't get mad about it. I tried to find love in someone else, but there was nobody that made me feel like she did. Their relationship ended after about two months.\n\nIn recent months, we've been having longer conversations and I'm much more comfortable with her now. One thing I have noticed is that she talks to me more if we're alone, not really if there are many people around. I'm getting mixed signals from her.\n\nMy friends have encouraged me to ask her out again, one of which is the guy she dated after breaking up with me. We are both different people and I've learned a lot, so I know I can be better to her than before. I still care about her, and I feel like a part of her still cares about me.\n\nOne of my worries if I do this is that she'll just shut down again one day. Once that happens it's like she puts up a wall that is impossible to break down. \n\nI am overly analytical and I've been running through this in my mind for months with no results. I need help making a decision.", "summary": "My girlfriend broke up with me a year ago. I still care about her, but I don't know if she does. Should I ask her out again?"}
{"id": "t3_53l0i0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "People are giving me [25F] a hard time about my boyfriend [26M] and I not wanting to move in together.", "post": "My boyfriend Robert and I have been together for two years this coming October. Last November, he moved to another city 3 hours away for a better paying job, but he totally regrets the decision and now is actively looking for jobs in the city that I live and we met in.\n\nI just graduated from college in August and I'm currently renting out a room in a couple's townhouse, but have already started making arrangements to move in with a girl friend after she graduates from college in January. Naturally, since I'm in a LDR and just graduated, people ask me questions about how Robert and I are doing and what I'm doing next. After I tell them that my boyfriend is moving back, they ask if we're moving in together. I say no, and most people are pretty shocked, asking me why wouldn't I want to move in together since we must miss each other so much? People will actively engage in a conversation with me about how weird we are and it really annoys me. I never thought people would be so shocked at mine and Robert's decision.\n\nRobert and I have talked about the possibility of moving in together and we both agree that neither of us are ready. We're both trying to build our careers and think that going from LDR to living together is way too drastic of a change. Also, Robert broke up with me last year around my birthday; we got back together six weeks after. Although I've forgiven him, I still have suppressed feelings about it and deep down it still hurts a bit. I'd be lying if I said that doesn't factor into my decision not to move in together just now.\n \nMy question is, what's the typical timetable for a couple to live together? I know every couple is different, but what is the general consensus? Also, we're not the type of couple that needs to be married before we move in together, that much we know for sure.", "summary": "People feel some type of way about my boyfriend and I not moving in together. What's the general timeframe for couples to cohabitate?"}
{"id": "t3_1ohrfj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] wanting to have dialogue with exGF [19F] of 8 months after 8 months of no talking.", "post": "I separated with my girlfriend back in the beginning of February, and during all of that time I've still been in love with her, but successfully didn't contact her at all.  We were each others' first love, whatever that means, and I know what I did really hurt her.  Since September I've been backpacking throughout Europe by myself, and have had this strong desire to contact her.  We were friends on fb during all this time, but she recently deleted me, which to me just shows that reminders of me hurt, also why I blocked her and chose to not see into her life.\n\nIs it out of line to write her, just to communicate, see what's going on in her head/life?  I'm not trying to force her to be with me or anything, but I miss her and it pulls at me, affecting my life in hindering ways.  I just want to know the person I used to be so close with, if that's possible.", "summary": "Broke up with girlfriend, messy, heartbroken on both sides, now I want to talk to her again after almost 9 months.  What do?"}
{"id": "t3_3d0ubt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my close friends [23-26 M/F] who are lazy and never want to put effort into anything.", "post": "Sometimes I get the feeling that hanging out with this close group of friends is allowing me to miss so many opportunities in life. My friends who I hang out with on a regular basis, and who I've known throughout college, are all pretty large in body size. Some of them are tipping on the edge of being overweight and some are obese. I'm the thinnest and most fit one in the group. I'm constantly out doing stuff, whether it be running and being active or making plans to go do active stuff, i.e. being outside. They never seem excited to do these sorts of things and would rather spend their nights inside, watching Netflix, drinking liquor/beer, or playing video games. It's really frustrating sometimes. They're a great group of people that I genuinely enjoy spending time with because they're good natured, funny, and we all support eachother when someone is going through a rough time. I just hate that they never want to be active and go to events/places like I do. It's always a fight for \"time\" and \"money\" and \"getting off work\", etc, etc - the list goes on. But I know that's it mostly bullshit because they are happy to plan an event where we get together at someone's house just to drink and have fun.\n\nI don't know what to do. I understand that I can meet more people who are into a similar lifestyle as mine (thank god my girlfriend is an active person), but I've known these guys for so long, I just wish I could motivate them into losing weight and being active - they have no idea what kind of life they're missing.", "summary": "My friends are all lazy and don't want to be active - I feel like it's making me miss out on opportunities."}
{"id": "t3_3j6jje", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by loving my SO", "post": "Hello TIFU, please let me point out I'm bad at formatting, in a rush, and tired so please be kind. Now let's get started\n\nToday I was waiting with my gf after school at her bus stop so we started to play (not in a sexual way you pervs). Here's the scene, I'm a reasonably well built guy and my SO is very short and very skinny. I'm holding her with my arm and I poke her nose, then she pokes my noise, then I poke her nose, then I we start saying random phrases like \"meep\" or \"boop\" or \"oy\". Suddenly our principal comes up and says:\n\n\"Keep that up and you'll come to my office for a nice loooong chat\".\n\nNow he's known as being quite a jokester so I just laugh a bit. After about 15 seconds he hasn't broken his cold unforgiving stare with a smile that's becoming creepy. I get a slightly confused look on my face and look to my gf for backup and of course she's looking elsewhere. I ask him:\n\n\"Wait, sir I'm confused, what's happening exactly?\"\n\nHe get's very close and says:\n\n\"You better let her go or else you're coming with me.\" No smile, murder in his voice.\nAt this point I imagine a mass effect choice menu with these options: point out we're dating, let my go of my gf and nod my head and say okay, pretend I only speak Russian, become a ninja and spin kick him in the throat. I froze up and just muttered 'okay' and let my go of my gf. Then he says 'better' and just walks away. After he left we just sort awkwardly laughed it off and we're joking about it right now.", "summary": "holding your SO and playing a game of boop = assault/sexual harrasment but it all ended well."}
{"id": "t3_4lqy0e", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "3 car accident and I was put at fault. What do I do?", "post": "No point in explaining how the accident went down. I was in a 3 car accident and the insurance companies put me at fault for the accident. I tried fighting this but I could tell it wasn't going anywhere..\n\nI live in California, and the accident took place in a fairly wealthy neighborhood. My car got t-boned and the first two other cars I hit were essentially totaled (mine included). The last car drove away with a dent. I only had partial insurance so my side of the insurance only covered a small portion of the damages. \n\nYesterday I received a letter from a law firm explaining that I need to pay the rest of the damages (something in the $11,000 range). I'm a poor college student and have never even seen half of that amount in my bank account. I'm too scared to even respond to that letter, I can't afford that much money and I know that there is probably going to be a second letter on the way..\n\nWhat do I do?", "summary": "got in an accident with only partial insurance. Im expected to cover the rest of the  damages and I can't afford that insane amount."}
{"id": "t3_2dmjeu", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "What should my next move be?", "post": "Sorry for the wall of text, it's hard to summarize.. \n\nI (21F) met this guy (21 or 22M) back in March visiting my friends at their college. We spent the night together. We didn't have sex, but we did fool around a bit. He seemed genuinely interested in me and sweet and even walked me back to my friend's apartment in the morning. While talking we figured out that he's moving to the same city I currently attend college in for a really good job. \n\nFast forward to now, he's here and texted me. I live in a suburb not too far away and am going back to school for the semester on Wednesday. I texted him a couple times since March, but he only reached out once in July to tell me he was here. I asked him out, I thought it went well, but he insisted he was too busy to see me before I went on a 2 week vacation abroad. I just got back yesterday. So.. do I text him? Or wait for him to come to me? I don't want to scare him off, but I am interested in pursuing this further. He seems really great despite us only having met once. It's rare I crush on someone that would actually probably be good for me. Please help.", "summary": "Met a guy back in March, he moved to the city I go to school in and live near by, we've texted, but haven't hung out yet.. now what? "}
{"id": "t3_3qtbmi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] with my boyfriend [18 M], acts like we don't have sex enough", "post": "Hi reddit, first time posting. I have been lurking for a while.\n\nI've been with my boyfriend Alex for 12 months. We live together, and have a good relationship apart from little arguments about chores and stuff.\n\nLately he has been acting like we're not having sex enough. He will drop things in the conversation about how he doesn't feel attractive, and if his weight is a problem (it isn't, he's pretty ripped) and asks why I don't touch him more. Just general things like that. When I try to tell him I don't think we have sex too little, he agrees with me and acts like nothing is wrong, but in a way that tells me he just doesn't want to upset me.\n\nI do reject him 50% of the times he tries to start something. I have a weak immune system, and I get sick alot and don't really feel like sleeping with him. Another thing is I recently went through losing a 5 week old puppy I rescued and bottlefed to parvovirus. I don't want to bring this up to him because it will sound like an excuse, but I nursed that little guy and syringe fed him for 2 weeks and losing him really messed me up.\n\nI'm rambling a bit, so my main problem with him acting like this is I think we have sex more than enough. On an average day, we have sex 4-5 times in a long session, rather than multiple single times a day. I'm wondering if maybe he doesn't see it as much because it's all in one big chunk. I make sure we do it so much because I want to keep him satisfied, even if I'm not feeling 100%. I can't help but feel a bit unappreciated. \n\nMainly asking this so I can read your responses and see high libido perspectives, and so we can see what people think after we have a talk about it.", "summary": "boyfriend doesn't act like we have sex enough, we do it 3-4 times a day on average. Want to show him redditor views"}
{"id": "t3_shv8w", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "I can't stop binging lately and I am starting to feel worthless...", "post": "Some background: I started my weight loss back in September (starting at 164lbs) and have lost about 35 pounds now. I did this by calorie counting, portion control, C25K and weight lifting. Currently 5'5'/f/130ish lbs, running 20-30 miles a week, lifting about 1-2 times a week and added in cycling 1-2 times a week. I'm also training for my first half marathon that's in June.\n\nSo, the actual story: For the past few weeks I have had some major issues with binging. I will just open up the pantry and just start eating handfuls of everything in sight. I'll munch on chips, cereal, crackers, peanut butter... Last week I just sat with the peanut butter and a spoon and just ate straight out of the jar, probably around 5-6 servings. Two nights ago I sat on the couch with a box of cereal and ended up eating half of the box. \n\nLast night was awful and my worst binge yet. I thought it would be nice to make those [individual bacon egg bake] that I can eat for breakfast. I ended up eating one, which is fine. It barely put me over my calorie limit for the day. Then I decided I was going to make that cookie mix I had sitting in the pantry. I ended up eating about 1/4 of the cookie dough and had 3 cookies after they were done baking. After eating all of this I felt horrible and actually made myself throw it all back up. \n\nI feel like this is my lowest point I have ever been in my life. I'm just not sure where to go from here. I'm not actively trying to lose like I was in the beginning but this is not healthy, especially after what I did last night. I tell myself I need to stop eating but its like my hand cannot stop shoving food into my mouth. I never had any issues like this in the beginning and actually had no issues stopping after having 1 serving of chips or 1 cookie. \n\nI really just need some advice, encouragement, motivation or how you got over something similar. I need to stop this madness and get back on track!! :(", "summary": "Lost 35lbs since September. I have been binging a lot lately and last night even made myself throw up after my binge. I feel like I am starting to become depressed and need to know how to get back on track!"}
{"id": "t3_1qeq2u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23F] boyfriend [26M] of 2 and 1/2 years dropped the bomb that he wants to break up", "post": "My boyfriend of two and a half years dropped the bomb on me that he wants to break up.\n\nI've supported him through everything.  From losing his license, to getting laid off at work, to finding out his brother is an addict, to dealing with a crazy ex, and more.\n\nHis reasons are he is frustrated by my poor stress management and also he has just decided that he doesn't want a long term relationship anymore. \n\nI have anxiety, it's something I've had my whole life.  I went to therapy for it years ago and also last year again and I admitted that lately I have dropped the ball with it.  I have been talking to my doctor recently about exploring some new options, maybe considering medication.  His situations don't help with my anxiety or overall stress but other than that the relationship has been awesome. We have a lot of fun together and we share a lot of the same views about life and where we want to go in the future.  We have so much in common and our personalities go together great.  He has been a great boyfriend up until the last couple of months.  When I brought it up to him that things are getting a little one sided that's when he told me he wants out.\n\nLast week he did have a pretty big falling out with his best friend over some stressful stuff (friendship ending type stuff) and on top of that he said he has been under a lot of stress at work.  I'm wondering if this sudden decision is just him poorly handling stress and trying to shut down and not deal with our situation instead of resolve it.\n\nI managed to get him to think about reconsidering this week and we would talk again on Friday.  Obviously I am hoping he chooses to try to work things out but honestly I think I am going to get broken up with a second time.  \n\nAlmost everyone I talked to about it thinks there's another girl he's not telling me about.  I want to break the silence we are supposed to be keeping and ask but I don't want to drive him away even more. I also don't think I can hang in there until Friday.\n\nhelp.", "summary": "boyfriend breaks up with me out of the blue because he claims I have poor stress management and doesn't want a long term relationship anymore."}
{"id": "t3_3d8735", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My \"friends\" [17 M, 18 F, 17 M] played an incredibly cruel prank on me [17M] and my boyfriend [18 M]", "post": "The entire group is currently staying at 17M's house for a week long vacation. There are two couples- me and my boyfriend, and the host with his girlfriend. There is one fifth wheel.\n\nLast night at around 1 AM, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in our room. Suddenly the fifth wheel barges in, totally unexpectedly, yelling an inside joke and throwing a condom at us, and running away. We were fully clothed, but PISSED. It was incredibly fucked up and we were both shocked. It was obviously the idea of all three of the remaining group.\n\nMy boyfriend and I confronted them, after we both calmed down. We cant understand how they thought this would be funny, as it is so fucked up on so many different levels. We could have been doing anything from sleeping to being naked. What did they expect to see? Did they expect us to just laugh it off? \n\nWhat bothers me most is that the host doesnt seem to be remorseful at all, even though he clearly agreed to this and suggested the idea. He blamed the fifth wheel for everything and said that he doesnt owe us an apology. This shocks me because its completely out of character for him, hes usually very politically correct and gentlemanly. He was a perfect host up till now and we were incredibly grateful for everything hes done for us during the vacation.\n\nAnyways there are 2 days left in the vacation and I dont know what to do right now. Its the morning after so we need to see them soon. Obviously we need to talk as a group, but I really dont know what to do if the host continues his attitude.", "summary": "Group thought it would be funny to barge in on me and my boyfriend at 1AM during vacation, as a joke. We are pissed. Dont know what our next course of action should be."}
{"id": "t3_izgpc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "how do I get this girl's number", "post": "So last friday, when i got off work, a girl stopped her car near me and offered me a ride.\nIt turned out that she lived near my place and often saw me waiting for buses.\nI was kinda surprised and didnt get a chance to ask for her number on the way home (the ride was about 15mins), but we did have an enjoyable conversation.\nWhen she was dropping me off, she told me that she's moving to somewhere else and this was prbly the last time she d give me a ride(also the first time :S).\nAfter that I rlly regret not getting her number...I spent 2 hours on facebook trying to search her profile (I at least got to know her name obviously...), but it doesnt seem like she has one.\n\nBUT this morning, I saw her getting off the car near my workplace, it turned out that she just works across the street!\nWhat a coincidence! But as I was already 20mins late for work, I was in such a hurry, didnt get a chacne to ask her num.\n\nNow, at work, I ve been thinking for whole day what I should do to approach her.\n\nShould I wait for her after work and start a convo? Or should I leave a message that has my number on it and have \"text me :)\" written on it?\n\nThis could be big for me. She is a white girl and I'm azn, and u guys can prbly already tell english isnt even my first language.", "summary": "A girl gave me a ride home last friday. Did not get a chance to get her number. Saw her this morning again. Turned out she works across the street. WHAT SHOULD I DO?"}
{"id": "t3_1bsh7f", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (27F) have a bit of a dilemma with my roommate (30M)...", "post": "Throwaway cuz' I have friends on here.\n\nI've lived with my roommate for a month and known him for as long. Long story, but I was in a bad situation and desperate to get out, he was also, so when someone recommended we be roommates, we jumped at the opportunity. Despite not knowing each other before moving in, we've realized we're a lot alike and we've actually become pretty great friends. He's a cool person and I enjoy his company.\n\nHere's where it gets a little complicated. I've slept with him. Three times. And most nights when he gets off work, we snuggle together on the futon and watch a movie and end up falling asleep spooning. I figured we just had FWB type thing going on while we're both between GFs/BFs, so I've tried to not be weird about it and just act normally. Tonight though, while we were snuggled on the futon watching a movie, he laid his head on my lap, kissed my stomach and my thigh, then told me he loves me. I kinda tried to chuckle it off, because I figured he was high/supertired/half asleep (although I don't honestly think that he was) and didn't know what he was saying, but he asked me if I heard him then he repeated it. I just stroked his hair and told him to get some rest and he went to sleep. What do I do now? Do I pretend like he didn't say it or I didn't hear it and wait to see if he brings it up? Should ***I*** bring it up? And what do I say if he does? I seriously don't want to compromise or complicate my living situation, since I have nowhere else to go.", "summary": "Roommate I've only known a month and slept with a few times said he loves me, I don't now how to react."}
{"id": "t3_2v8z31", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by stabbing my crush with a pencil", "post": "Obligatory this wasn't today, it was actually years ago in third grade.\n\nMy crush (let us call him Gary) offered to let me borrow a pencil when I didn't have one, and of course, I was excited as hell. Later that day in class, I wanted to tell him something (I sat next to him) so I tapped his shoulder with what I thought was the eraser end of the pencil. Well, it apparently was more like a stab than a tap and it was with the freshly sharpened end of the pencil.\n\nIIRC, Gary yelped and the whole class looked at me, including the teacher.\n\nFortunately, my teacher didn't make me flip my card, and I don't think any blood was drawn from Gary.", "summary": "in third grade, crush gave me pencil. Tried to get his attention by tapping his shoulder with the eraser later, accidentally stabbed him with pointy end."}
{"id": "t3_42q7l4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my Girlfriend [16F] of 10 Months, To Argue or Not to Argue", "post": "Disclaimer: I am new to this subreddit. Help would be appreciated :)\n\nThis is my first relationship, and I do not want to break up with my girlfriend. I know this is a very simple thing to say as a high schooler, but my question is whether I get mad at her about is justifiable. \n\nRecently, she has been more distant with me and has not been replying to me as fast or with the same upbeat attitude she's had in the past. As a result, I do not feel the love in the relationship as much as I once did. It seems like her attitude is affecting me to not be as talkative which has led me to call her out on this. I've asked her multiple times to tell me why she seems more distant and if it's a problem with me, but she keeps saying, \"idk, sorry\". At this point, I got tired of it and told her that I won't talk to her until she wants to start a conversation for once and not seem like I'm boring her.", "summary": "My girlfriend seems distant, so I called her out on it; thus, I told her not to talk to me until she could start a convo with me and not sound like she's bored."}
{"id": "t3_1vhl0m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to have difficult conversations? (m27, f28)", "post": "Long story short - a few rumours went around about my boyfriend cheating on me. Soon after a guy who I know wants to destroy our relationship and keeps putting my hand down his pants told me that it wasn't cheating, that it was such a full blown affair that I was in fact the other woman.\n\nAll I want to do is get to the bottom of the situation so we/I can move on with our lives in the fashion most appealing to us (which for me would be to work on our relationship and move forward with that). However, I need the honesty of the situation to do that. But this is difficult. I don't want to go in guns blazing, but I want to protect myself. I'm trying to impress upon him the fact that honesty is the beginning of the healing process, whatever that process looks like. And I don't want my own insecurity to sabotage a good thing.", "summary": "How do I impress upon my boyfriend the importance for honesty, while stopping myself from getting pre-emptively defensive when he's trying to give it?"}
{"id": "t3_2hctms", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Friends of single people: please don't try to set said friends up with other friends who are \"uh...not conventionally appealing\" or \"Well, I'm not into her/him...but I think you'll like them\"", "post": "This happened to me today and it was immediately upsetting. I even cried about it when I got home. It was upsetting every other time someone has said something like this to me, too. \n\nI feel like there is an inherent judgment of MY worth when you do this kinda thing to me. \n\nWhy don't I deserve to be with someone who's \"AWESOME!\" or \"Wow, I totally love this guy/girl. I would be with them if I was single!\". \n\nI work on myself. I take pride in developing as a person and bettering myself. \n\nYou don't have to set me up with a supermodel but...but...God Damnit at least try to set me up with someone you don't think is the human equivalent of leftovers. Set me up with someone who's working on themselves and trying to develop as a human being. I'm not even really into being set up anyways. Maybe don't set me up with anyone at all.", "summary": "When you try to set me up with people who you describe as \"ok\" it makes me feel kinda inferior. Why don't I deserve someone who's \"awesome\" to you?"}
{"id": "t3_4hsa6f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 F] with my ex-BF [16 M] of 1.5yrs. I cheated on him and hid it. He found out and broke up but now wants to get back together.", "post": "My boyfriend asked me to homecoming sophomore year. I said no but I texted him later that I couldn't go but I'd date him. We dated for 1.5 years and I love him. I met another guy at a state event and started texting him because he was nice and was a new friend. He kept calling me hot and attractive and I texted him to quit being horny with a ;) face. My boyfriend saw the texts and broke up with me. I told him that I still love him and that I still care. He now wants to get back together but I don't think I can emotionally handle it knowing that I hurt him. I need advice on what to do.", "summary": "I cheated on my boyfriend. He broke up when he found out and now wants to get back together. I still love him but want to be friends because I can't emotionally handle a relationship with him. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3yvxa2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [17 F] boyfriend may or may not have lied to me [18 F] about losing virginity?", "post": "This is my first post, and on a throwaway account because boyfriend and I are both redditors. \n\nMy boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship. We met online and talked for a few months before meeting up, and it was amazing. I didn't agree to be his girlfriend until a few months after we became an official 'thing' due to trust issues I have from being in a prior relationship where I was cheated on. My boyfriend understands these problems as he was cheated on as well, and swore to never lie to me or cheat on me (in writing, lol). \n\nWe had sex 8 days ago on my birthday, and he was my first. He says I was his first as well. \n\nHowever, upon my random stalking of old reddit posts of his (I do this when I'm missing him), I found that he posted on a subreddit asking for advice on how to get custom condoms sent to his house because 'blah blah brands give me the red ring of death'. I can't understand any other reason as to why he would have done this other than the fact that he had sex with the girl he was with before and lied to me. This also confuses me because he said they never even kissed or held hands but were a 'thing' for nearly a year. The post was a year ago. \n\nHe's sleeping right now and I've texted and called him (he's a heavy sleeper). It's 1:00 a.m. my time and I can't even focus on anything other than being miserable right now. How do I proceed? Should I even entertain his possible explanation?", "summary": "My boyfriend claims he lost his virginity to me but posted on reddit about needing custom condoms sent to him over a year ago."}
{"id": "t3_i6omx", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Staying friends after a break-up", "post": "So my girlfriend of just over a year broke up with me today because she just doesn't love me in the same way anymore. I'm 19 and she's 18 and we managed a semi LDR quite successfully for nearly 10 of those months.\n\nThe qualm is that we are both best friends and dont want to lose that. She still wants to talk just as much as we have and snuggle up on the sofa and watch movies and stuff.\nThings seemed to be going downhill for a while I guess (can barely remember the last time we had sex) but she had exams and was stressed so I was just hoping for her to snap out of it but apparently she isnt going to.\n\nWhat Im asking is what is the best way we can remain friends without me getting my heart broken. I'm suprisingly ok with the breakup so far perhaps because things have been getting more and more platonic anyway so we are just friends even if I want to be more than that.\nIm just rambling now though so any and all advice welcome.", "summary": "Girlfriend of one year who is also my best friend broke up with me but we still want to be friends - how can it be done?"}
{"id": "t3_29iqqh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (F/21) am not allowed to go to my SO's (M/23) grandfather's funeral.", "post": "I'm sorry if this is too long or too short, but I am so pissed right now.\n\nWell, we found out papi (My so's grandfather) passed away last friday. His mother told us to hold on to making any plans until we know for sure when the funeral actually was. Today, he got a call from his mom saying that the funeral will be this friday. We live in NC and the funeral will be in his hometown in FL. The kicker is, he's leaving tomorrow morning (his birthday) and won't be back until sunday afternoon; and I'm not allowed to go, period. My SO and I have been together well over 3 years and we have a 9 month old baby together. So it's not just like he's leaving ad coming right back, he's going for a whole week...leaving me stuck at home (with no car and no phone) until his family is coming back. I have no idea how to take this. \n\nIt also makes me mad because his sister got married last october, and he just ditched me at my mom's even though I spent lots of money finding a nice dress and shoes that fit me right (I was a week away from my due date) only for him to leave me with no contact until the next day.", "summary": "SO is leaving me home alone with my 9 month old and no ride or contact to a fuberal in a different state for a week"}
{"id": "t3_1cu402", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[m18] have been dating this girl [f18] for just over a month and today she can me an ultimatum, really confused and sad. What should and could I do.", "post": "BACKGROUND info on her. She has daddy issues and has a case of depression. Doesn't seem like she is able to open up, afraid of being settled. Tells me she feels claustrophobic.\n\nI've been dating her for just over a month and today we were about to have sex and went through foreplay and I couldn't get a hard on because I just wanted feeling it. She took this as it was her fault I couldn't get it and lost all mood and blamed it on herself and I told her it wasn't but because I was nervous a bit because I liked her. She then tells me she hasn't gone down this road in a relationship before, she is afraid because she might ruin it and what not. She tells me either we can just be friends and have no more kissing/sex or we can just have sex and no emotion with it. She tells me if I pick the sex one then I have to be okay with her getting with other guys and I'm not okay with that because I like her and truly would be jealous. It's just a part of me. We then laid in bed for a solid 20 minutes silent and then I broke the silence and I could tell my her body position she was closing herself off. By the end the mood became more cheerful, we went through some old photos of us. BUT at the end of the night when I left, there was no goodbye kiss, just a solid goodbye. I feel sad because I really really like this girl and she is my prom date too which is in a month and if things go south I just feel like I can't emotional be around her because it will hurt me too much.", "summary": "Girl I'm with is very conflicted on where she stands with me and gave me the choice of either being friends or open relationship fuck buddies. What can I do!"}
{"id": "t3_3f196b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21m) cant seem to get over my ex-girlfriend (21f). And its taking a toll on my life.", "post": "Hi guys, ive been lurking here for a while but i didnt really think id need any relationship advice because i considered myself strong enough to handle these problems. It seems im wrong about that.\n\nBackground: I met my ex (well call her Jocelyn) when we were both in grade 9. We fell for eachother very quickly and were inseperable throughout highschool up until our last year when she told me had feelings for someone else and we ended it.\n\nWe reconciled in the middle of first year university and were together for about 3 more years until she finally broke up with me again, stating that she just couldnt see herself marrying me (which was what we both discussed would happen eventually). I took this very hard and ended up isolating myself from friends and family and fell into a small \"hole\" as i like to call it. A lot of drinking and marijuana was involved, which only made my situation worse.\n\nI started to gain back my confidence about 5 months after the break up when she contacted me again and asked to speak about our situation. Being the spineless person i am i agreed, and we only got together twice before she said it was a mistake and we should remain friends.\n\nI was fine with this (although quite annoyed) and we continued to speak regularly, which i admit was a horrible idea. She told me about 3 weeks ago that shes seeing someone and we shouldnt speak anymore, ive agreed with this as it would be innapropriate to continue speaking. However, ive found myself in that \"hole\" once again. \n\nI continually think about her during every aspect of my day, even though i know the pain ive been through when ive been with her. I know i shouldnt and cant rely on someone else to give me happiness, but im not sure really what to do at this point. \n\nSo after my huge ramblings (i havent really talked to anyone about all this recently), does anyone have advice on how i can get her out of my head? Its gotten to the point of obsession and it needs to stop for my own mental well being.", "summary": "I cant get over my ex girlfriend of 5 years and its causing many problems in my life. Any advice would be appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_4g9imo", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[17/m] in a sticky situation with her [17/f], my Asian parents, and the school administration", "post": "Over two years ago my girlfriend and I started dating in secret. We were in secret because my parents are (racist?) in the way that they only want me to date people from an Asian background like me, and she is white. Eventually, because our school is super small and rumors spread like crazy, the staff found out maybe about a year ago. We went and made sure they knew not to go to our parents, and they all agreed. Fast forward to now and the principal and guidance counselor have called my parents and spilled the entire story to them. They apparently even had to use generic words like \"girlfriend and her mom\" instead of saying names to get around privacy rules. After talking it over with some of our close friends, no one has any insight or heard of anything that could cause them to do this, and it's very uncharacteristic of them. My parents have told me that the school administration has said things such as, \"She's in a lower social class, he can do better,\" \"She's bringing his grades down\" (I have a 4.0 GPA), etc. While my parents have also said things such as \"She's white trash,\" and \"She's a gold digger,\" I know for sure that those are both incorrect. Heck, my parents haven't even spoken to her for more than 3 minutes. Now that the jig is up, I'm not sure what to do. Do I secretly talk to her and risk losing everything except food and school supplies for the next year if I get caught? Do I  make arrangements to get back together in a year? Or Do I just give up and accept it as over? All of this stress is really getting to me, and I  have no idea what the best choice is. Thanks for reading all of that, and giving me any feedback!", "summary": "My \"racist\" parents hate my 2 year white gf. The school principal called them and ratted us out for no reason. not sure what to do"}
{"id": "t3_4n3jnz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] squeeze my girlfriend [19 F] of 4 months', legs just because she likes how it feels, but she won't return the favor", "post": "My girlfriend and I have our own small physical contacts that we both enjoy. I like it when she lays on my chest, she likes it when I squeeze her legs, things like that. I also like it when my hair is squeezed with a tight fist (put not pulled after the grab). I had told her I liked the feeling of that before, but never asked her to do it directly. One day when I was laying in her lap I asked if she would squeeze my hair, and she said no. When I asked her why not, she did not respond.\n\nI was a little hurt by her denial of my simple request, not because she didn't squeeze my hair, but because she wasn't willing to do something I though it felt good, with out a justification as to why. I don't actually like to squeeze her legs, I find it painful after an extended period (she knows it hurts, I've told her), but I do it because she likes it.\n\nUntil now, I had never specifically asked for any of this kind of physical contact, but once I told her directly about my desires, she actively avoids it now.\n\nWas I wrong to ask that of her?\n\nWas my request unreasonable?\n\nShould I feel hurt by her denial?\n\nWas I expecting something I shouldn't?", "summary": "I squeeze my girlfriends legs, but she won't squeeze my hair. Is it wrong that I expected her to rerun the favor?"}
{"id": "t3_1bal64", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I would like to know Reddit's opinion on using Federal money to put a police officer in every primary and secondary school in the United States.", "post": "Hey Reddit! Thanks for reading my post.\n\nI personal view police officers an important resource in society and that having an officer in every school would be great. I have two reasons for this, one is that they can provide protection and the second is that they can be role models for kids that might not have one. So the protection part is pretty obvious, the officers have guns and bad guys avoid guns, but what people don't think about is that an officer can identify and take action against domestic violence. Another thing that gets overlooked is how much of a need there is for police outreach to kids in America and a police officer can do just that. By placing officers in schools you give the kids a chance to see that they are just normal people that want to help you, especially if you teach the cops how to tutor and put them in a basic Algebra class every now and then, that would turn so many lives around.", "summary": "Officers can provide protection from criminals and domestic violence while doing public outreach by being role models and tutoring lower level math classes. "}
{"id": "t3_44e99i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [30 F] girlfriend of 5 months just gave me [29 M] a deadline for our relationship.", "post": "I've been dating this girl for 5 months now but I've known her for 3 years. It has been going really great and both of us have said that we are in love. We don't meet that often, maybe twice a week with a sleepover about every other week. I feel really good about the relationship and have been trying to increase the time we spend together to know her better and trying to introduce her to more of my friends.\n\nHowever, the last time we met, she told me that she wants to settle down and needs to know where our relationship is going. She's under some pressure from her family to get married and said that I have 2 months to either propose to her or break up. I said that's not nearly enough time for me and there's no way I can make that promise. We almost broke up there but then she said that I can have 4 months and I said I need a few days to think about it. She said that she doesn't want to move in with me before marriage but will live with me for a few weeks if I want that.\n\nThis is crazy right? I feel like I was in a car accident. I don't know where this came from and why she doesn't want to give our relationship some time instead of having this deadline. I really do like her and don't want to end it but I'm really confused. Saying yes to the 4 months thing will probably put me under a lot of pressure for that time and I think it would just be bad for our relationship.\n\nI'm not opposed to working towards marriage but I can't do that with these artificial deadlines. I'm meeting her this weekend to talk about this more, but I'm really not sure of what to say.", "summary": "Girlfriend of 5 months has given me 4 months to propose or break up. I don't want to end it but I think the pressure of a deadline would be really bad for our relationship. Please advise."}
{"id": "t3_2c022d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] and my girlfriend [20F] have been dating for about a year how do I tell my strict parents", "post": "I moved out of my parents house when I was 18 to go to university which is about 700km away from home. During my freshmen year I met my girlfriend and we started dating ever since then, I have had to keep my relationships with ANY girls a complete secret from my extremely religious Muslim parents. The real problem is that we want to move in together but I'm sure if I tell my parents they will not let me go back to school away from home in September. The main reasons I don't just tell them to F--- off is because they pay for my tuition and the fact that I really care what my parents think. \n\nI don't know how to tell my parents I have an Asian girlfriend that I've been dating for over a year and we want to move in together. I'm pretty sure they think that I will end up getting hitched with some girl my mom picks for me, like my sisters did (and we all know how great their marriage's are).", "summary": "have an asian GF that wants to move in and my strict racist Muslim parents don't know about and need advice on how to tell them. FML"}
{"id": "t3_37wfyw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by opening my water bottle.", "post": "Some preliminary notes \u2014 this happened yesterday at school, and it was actually my friend who caused this whole ordeal (his bottle, his attempt to clean it). Regardless, I'll share my bland point of view since I was in attendance the entire time.\n\nIn the morning announcements, we were all instructed to empty out our lockers by the end of the day or risk losing whatever we failed to reclaim. Two friends and I \u2014 one friend, Zed (not his real name), being the character of importance \u2014 shared a locker, and the only remaining articles were our history textbooks and Zed's running shoes and opaque water bottle. Zed had told me throughout the year not to touch his bottle because it's \"a bomb\", and I never thought much of it until that day.\n\nDuring our break between second and third period, the three of us returned our textbooks and went with Zed to the bathroom, who intended to wash his bottle. He unscrewed the top and dumped the contents into one of the toilets \u2014 some pale orange liquid that, to me, faintly resembled vomit. He then proceeded to the nearest sink and left the now-empty bottle under some running water. At this point in time, there was nothing in the bathroom that smelled particularly bad.\n\nAlmost instantaneously, the air was pervaded by the most putrid stench conceivable, and, by split-second deduction, we pinpoint the cause to be whatever he poured out into the toilet. Half the people in the bathroom start coughing and grunting after mere seconds, many already trying to push past me and run out. I grabbed my friends and stumbled backwards with them out into the hallway, which was already completely obstructed by people who had retreated or were reluctant to enter (the odor had already seeped well out the doorway).\n\nSoon enough, you had a whole nauseated crowd lingering outside the bathroom, with no one besides us really knowing what was discharging that terrible redolence. I stood on the side laughing for a good ten minutes while the crowd (but not the stink) gradually thinned out, while Zed tried to save any familiar-looking soul that intended to enter the abyss.", "summary": "friend plans to wash his old water bottle, ends up saturating the building with the aroma of year-old Thai tea and unleashing olfactory Armageddon."}
{"id": "t3_qzj7a", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Need to convince a coworker that I watched \"Mamma Mia\", and I have no intention of watching it myself. HELP. (Likely Spoilers)", "post": "A sweet sweet secretary at my work knows I'm gay so she always tries to go out of her way to make me feel welcomed. As a result, she convinced herself that I REALLY wanted to watch the movie \"Mamma Mia\" because I'd love it SO MUCH (...because I'm gay).\n\nNow, I don't normally watch movies, let alone movies without explosions or decapitations. The back of the movie made it sound even more boring (Random chick getting married goes on a zany adventure to find her real father - with madcap muscial results!) I have no intention of sitting 90+ minutes through a fucking musical, so I am appealing to the good folks at reddit to help me to trick her into thinking I watched it. \n\nWhat are some scenes I can reference to make it seem like I watched it, or things I can say (thinking along the lines of \"Wow...Meryl Streep really had a tour de force performance!\" or \"Collin Firth is such a cad...and such a dreamboat!\") to make it seem like I gave two shits about it. I know I can read reviews online, but I need specific scenes or themes that will work in a small talk like conversation.", "summary": "I am too guilty to admit I don't want to watch Mamma Mia, but too lazy to actually watch it."}
{"id": "t3_2rls9c", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Loose skin (discussion)", "post": "Every progress pic I see is incredible. And I'm really motivated by seeing the results of others. Its truly inspiring to see people making healthy choices and achieving their goals. Its also great to read about obstacles overcome by sheer willpower. However, when I scroll the comments I notice that there is an overwhelming concern from everyone about loose skin after weight loss. I'm assuming that it has much to do with a fear of appearing unattractive to potential partners. I could be wrong.\n\nThis post is meant to lead to  a healthy discussion to help calm the nerves of those that might be scared of losing weight because of loose skin. \n\nPersonally I have been there. In the past I have been afraid to start getting serious with losing weight because of the idea of loose skin.  \n\nI have decided recently that I will cross that bridge when I get there, and that the lesser of two evils would be to have a healthier body. I'm trying desperately hard to change my life. Every day is a battle, and I'm actively choosing to disregard those negative voices that whisper to me \"but all that work will be for nothing\".  \" Why try, its too late for you to look that good.\" And \"Nobody will ever be attracted to you, you're a piece of garbage.\" As you can imagine, I've dealt with a lot of self image issues because of my weight. I've been picked on, and I know that I'm not the only one to have had such terrible experiences whilst being overweight. That's why I open this discussion up.\n\nPlease upvote for visability. This discussion could reach someone that would otherwise give up on their goals and aspirations. \n\nI hope that comments from the community might help support and motivate others to lose weight, regardless of what may happen with skin. \n\nI'm looking forward to gaining support from this community, and a greater feeling of togetherness. This may be the only supportive resource for some of us, and this discussion could help people tremendously.", "summary": "The idea of having loose skin after losing weight is scary. Let's talk about it, and support each other in this process."}
{"id": "t3_t75dw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you handle people who continuously lie?", "post": "Do you call them out on it or let them have their \"fun\"?\n\nThere's this girl who is part of my group of friends.  I'm not super fond of her, but there's always someone in a group who rubs you the wrong way.  My biggest issue with her is that she lies constantly.  Sometimes about the most inane shit.  \n\nMostly I just keep quiet while she exaggerates or just flat out makes shit up, but this morning she really pissed me off.  We went to the same tech school culinary class in HS.  There was a guy in our class that ended up dying.   This was years ago.  Now one of our friends is dealing with a death in their family and I don't know if liar is jealous of the support and attention our other friend is getting, but she bold faced called this guy who died in HS her boyfriend.  Not only that, but made it out as if it was some epic love that they had.  She goes on about putting on a brave face and all this other shit.  Basically pulling from her imaginary experience to offer up advice.  \n\nI remember her back then.  They never dated.  If I'm remembering correctly she was kind of a bitch to him actually.  I can usually tolerate her blatant bullshit, but using this guy for attention or wtfever she gets out of it is really bugging me.  I thought if I took some time to cool off I'd stop being so pissed about it, but it's over 3 hours later and I still thinks its really fucked up.\n\nHow do handle people like this?  Do you call them out?  I don't know exactly what it'd accomplish besides a huge fight, but I might feel better....or is it better to keep the peace and just let it go?", "summary": "Someone I know is lying about having a relationship with someone who's died.  Call her out or get over it?"}
{"id": "t3_qhfbk", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Roommate relapsed", "post": "I moved in with this guy (I'll call him Stan) about 6 months ago.  \nHe said he was a recovering alcoholic at first and he had been sober for a year or two.  \nI learned later on that he was also a heavy narcotic user in the past, but he's put all that behind him years ago.  \nHe and his partner (I'll call him Pete) went on vacation a ways away for eight days and are returning tomorrow (3/5/12).  \nLate last night, I got a call from Pete who said that Stan had relapsed and was drunk and/or using drugs.  \n  \nWhat I'm looking for right now is how to approach this situation when they return.  \nApparently, Stan feels really bad for what he did, but Pete doesn't want me to admit to Stan that I knew anything about what had happened.  \nAnyone know what I should do?", "summary": "My new roommate relapsed on drugs and alcohol after being clean and sober for a few years.  How should I handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_wrouf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Fiance not a fan of my best friend and her fiance...need advice!", "post": "Me-(27 Female), Fiance-(26 Male)...I introduced my fiance to my best friend Marie (26) and her fiance Mark (32) about a year ago.  One of the first times we hung out as couples Marie was kind of whiny about some things and put a damper on the day for everyone.  Since then my fiance has had a bad taste in his mouth about her.\n\nAfter that point he expressed to me that he was disinterested in spending time with them in the future (even though he finds Mark to be a perfectly nice guy).  I understood his point of view, but since she's my best friend I encouraged him to give her another chance.  From that point on we've enjoyed several dinners, BBQ's, etc. with them and she's never done anything to be rude or annoying to him.\n\nHowever, he recently confessed to me that for the past year every time we have had these \"couple dates\" he has solely done it to \"keep me quiet\" and that he really does not want anything to do with them.  In the same convo he told me he thinks they are both very nice people and he does NOT dislike them, but that he feels he has nothing in common with them.  He says he likes spending time with all of my other friends but said he no longer wishes to spend time with Marie and Mark.\n\nI do not want to try to tell him who to be friends with, but I guess I just don't see why if he likes them, he has to withdraw from any future time spent with them.  It would be more understandable to me if he had a strong dislike for either of them.\n\nMy question in all of this is how do I handle things now with my friends Marie and Mark when suddenly all of our time spent as couples is now reduced to the three of us?  It makes me sad because they really like my fiance and truly consider him a friend.  They have no clue that he wants nothing to do with them and has felt this way all along.  \n\nHas anyone else experienced this?  How can I avoid hurting my friends' feelings and this being awkward for me? \n\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "Fiance wants to be excluded from any/all time spent with my best friend & her fiance, but has kept quiet about it for a year now how do I explain the awkwardness of him being mysteriously absent to my friends?"}
{"id": "t3_2h2rdy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[EX] Me [23 M] with my Ex[22 F] 3.5 years, i want her back.", "post": "Ok fellow redditors, here we go;\n\n6 months ago my ex broke up with me because \"she didn't feel the way she was supposed to feel anymore\"\n\nbut..  \n\nAs stated in the title, i want my ex back, probably sounds pretty generic but i cant help it.\nWe broke up 6 months ago, i was fucking pissed and got into a new relationship, thought it was a good idea at first i had great sex and great talk with my new girlfriend but something was missing all the time. \nFound out my \"new\" girlfriend was a just a rebound to my ex so i decided i should end the relationship between us.. Also as a matter of fact i thought about my ex every single day during our relationship, about how it would be if she didn't break up with me and hearing all the voices of friends and relatives inside my head at the breakup; \"its a shame, thought you would get married soon and get children and such\" and all that crap.\n\nAfter all, i miss her every day so god damn bad i'm thinking of asking her out just to check out her interest in me, maybe its something and we could start over again? right? \nAfter all its the only person ever in my life i felt comfortable with in a relationship, in my eyes she was perfect.\n\nSo yeah, maybe its my head messing with me or maybe she is the one.. i don't really know anymore i feel that this post doesn't even make sense to you guys.\n\nI still have about weekly (friendly) contact with her at the moment\n\nWhat do you think? I'm just so fucking confused..", "summary": "Broke up, got new GF, broke up again because cant stop thinking of the love of my life; my ex."}
{"id": "t3_1axus1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [17F] girlfriend, despite an otherwise perfect 4 month relationship, seems completely uninterested in anything beyond making out despite explicitly telling me otherwise. [17M]", "post": "So my girlfriend and I have been together for a little more than 4 months. Everything has been great, we get along fantastically, share similar interests, and love doing things together. When making out things are great, it's just fun, never awkward, and we really have a good time. However, whenever I attempt to instigate anything beyond making out she subtly pushes me away (shifts positions, pulls shirt down etc.). I've talked to her about it and she says that she's totally fine and comfortable with doing things beyond making out (although I know she never has), but in the moment she never seems to want to. How would you recommend I bring this up again and talk to her about?", "summary": "Dating for four months, says she is okay with \"doing stuff\" but never acts like it. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2765b0", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Texas- car towed, took it back without asking.", "post": "A few weeks ago, my friends and I went to go see a DJ. We parked in a lot with a gas station, on a side parking spot facing the street. There were no posted signs about towing, and there was clearly space for it.  We went to the show and came back to find our cars towed. Apparently this took place within minutes of us walking away. \n\nBeing 4 kids in our early 20s on the wrong side of town at night, no money, and no transportation, we found some local police to help us out. They understand our predicament and took us 10 miles away to the tow yard. \n\nWe arrived and got in line with around 20 others there to pick up their cars.\nMy friend stays to pay for his car, but in the moment I saw the tow company as essentially a group of thugs who just stole my car and were trying to extort money from me. \n\nThe gate was open next to me where people were walking in. I saw my chance and followed them. Found my car and drove off the lot.\n\nMinutes later I get a call from my friend, still on the lot, saying they, the tow company, had called the police and had a squad of cops and tow trucks looking for me. Luckily, I arrived home and nothing happened.\n\nI was a little frightened, but everything seemed to work.out fine.\n\nToday I received a letter from the tow company saying they had filed a report with the police that the car was stolen from their lot. \n\nIn the letter they requested the $270 for the tow and said that if I didnt pay up in the next 10 days then they would \"take further action\" against me. \n\nAlso, the tow company cc'd the letter to my cars finance agency.", "summary": "tow company stole my car and asked for a lot of money. Just walked in the open gate and took it back."}
{"id": "t3_j9xvk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit, maybe you can help me get these for my classroom?", "post": "I teach theatre design at a performing arts magnet school in Tampa, FL. I took over the program last year after it had been on a downward spiral for several years and I'm rapidly turning it around. \n\nThe problem is that we, of course, get little to no funding for the basic things that we need for our program/classroom. I have a Donor's Choose account, and currently have two open projects that need funding for the upcoming school year:\n\nThis one is for new drafting mats for the drafting desks in my room. Since the program hadn't been maintained in years, all of the old mats were drawn all over and cut to shreds. I want to teach drafting as a part of my advanced class this year, but without these it's impossible.\n\nThis project isn't *as vital* but it's still important. It's model building supplies so that my students can learn how to build scale models of the theatre and their scenic designs.\n\nThe other thing that I really need help with is computers - I really want to get 12-15 computers (ideally iMacs, but high end PCs would work too) but I am having a nearly impossible time getting them from the school. Does anyone have any leads on some kind of grants or any ideas as to how I can get new or used machines for my students to learn CAD on?", "summary": "Theatre design teacher looking for some funding help to get his new classroom functional after years of non-use and no support. "}
{"id": "t3_2gjg8n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M]e 27 with LDR SO [23F] that I just reconciled with after breaking up with her for 3 weeks moving in next month.", "post": "I have posted before. My SO has visited me a few times and stayed lengthy times each visit. We had an argument over a non romantic female friend a while back and I broke up with her over it.\n\n During the break I hooked up multiple times with a FWB and told my SO about it. She said it hurt her but she can be over it and she wants to move in with me. \n\nMy question is now that I have sacrificed for her but also hurt her by having sex with another women during the break up how should I handle it? Should this just be a fresh start for us or should we sit down and talk about it in person once she gets here?\n\nI do feel guilty but at the time I didn't think a reconcile would happen. After  talking to her again I realized how much I love her.", "summary": "girlfriend is moving in with me next month. I had sex with another woman during a 3 week break up I had with her and told her. She forgave me."}
{"id": "t3_1ajq9s", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I need help keeping the type of girls i like.", "post": "I'm a genuinely nice, considerate, and polite guy. I'm not a pushover by any means, but i find that being this way is what i'm most comfortable with. I'm kind of proud with the level of awareness i have when it comes to other peoples feelings. That said, i'm into girls that are kind of the opposite. Like bad girls, who might dress kind of gothy, have raunchy humor, and are assertive. \n\nThe problem is that when i go for these types their personality \"adapts\" to mine. They maybe try to seem nicer or polite than they really are, even though that's not their true personality. I think they see how i am and they fear i might judge them for not being like that. That's not true, and i know any kind of relationship won't really work if everybody's trying to be something they're not.", "summary": "How do i go about making them feel more comfortable being tmeselves, without them turning overly self-conscious of how they act around me?"}
{"id": "t3_nk7z0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you sabotage your workplace?  I'll start.", "post": "I work as a cook in a restaurant and ever since my old boss got fired, the new guy has been a real prick.  Even so, he's been pretty lenient about making food for yourself on the job, but has been increasingly stingy about making food for servers, runners, etc.  Not to mention he tried to short me on a paycheck.  Anyway I was never shy about taking food from work, but now I do it more than I ever did or would need to.\n\nTaking a meal home is frowned upon--and I do it anyway--but I also find myself taking home food that isn't perishable (jars of nutella) or that I don't even want and won't use (coconut milk?!?).  Also I took a shit-ton of saran wrap for my windows when it got cold.", "summary": "On top of stealing shit I need and use, I steal shit I don't even want because my boss is a dick."}
{"id": "t3_10f42n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M17] and [F17], emotional problems on my end", "post": "So she and I have been together since we were 13, and she moved away a while ago. We have been in a long distance relationship for a while but it has began to fade. She already broke up with me a few months ago, but I managed to win her back. She visits only every few months.\n\nShe will be coming back soon, but I find myself attracted to another girl who I have never even spoken to before. My current girlfriend is great but we barely see each other and she says that her love fades everytime she goes back.\n\nWe talk every day and she likes all the things I do. I do not know if I am looking for some excuse to end the relationship before her just so I can pursue this other girl (who I have not even talked to yet). So the attraction is superficial to say the least, but I have a deep feeling that if it was not for my morals and conscience, I would have already tried to contact and talk with her. \n\nI am stuck. I cannot make an objective decision because if I try to justify our fading relationship it feels like an excuse to try and go pursue this other girl. It might be just a passing thing, and I do not know what to do.", "summary": "In a long distance relationship, feels like its fading, been broken up already once, but girlfriend seems to be okay right now"}
{"id": "t3_28naic", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19F] with my BF [20M] of a year, and he keeps Facebook creeping other girls", "post": "So a few days ago I stumbled upon his Facebook search history. I scrolled down to see the list, and there are about 3 girls (friends) that keeps coming up. Every month there'd be a few times where it says \"___ searched for CuteGirlA \" . but one girl got more searches than the other ones... \n\nI then confronted him. He lied about it at first until i showed him the proof.  and he said that he has a \"creeping addiction\"? and that he feels bad every time he does it but can't stop himself.. But he said its merely for entertainment and not lust..is there such thing?  \n\nHe apologized many times, and said he really does love me.  and he would do anything to earn back my trust, and he even deleted Facebook for me. but I feel very betrayed and I don't know what to do that'll make me feel better.. can i trust him again?", "summary": "he has a \"creeping addiction\" on Facebook for a few particular girls (one more than the other). he apologized and deleted his Facebook. but I still feel betrayed, can i trust him?"}
{"id": "t3_36ss4f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (m17) Girlfriend's (f18) of 4 months family is poor... What do I do?", "post": "Should I even get involved? My girlfriend comes from a family of two little sisters, mother and father. Her parents are separated, (her father seems fine) but her mother is really poor off... We went to her mother's house today and there was a notice from the water company, saying they owe hundreds and their water will be shut off soon. They have a hard time putting food on the table, but her mother just bought a new car. \n\nWhat I'm confused about is whether or not this is an issue of her mother not being able to budget/prioritize properly, or if she just doesnt make enough money...She's a high school teacher and also picks up hours at Home Depot when she can. My girlfriend has a job, and her mother takes nearly all of the money she makes from her bank account without asking. Her mother also seems to be housing a \"boyfriend\", I use that term lightly, because I don't think he adds any income to the house and is mooching; he sleeps there, and when he is not in the house, he has their car. My girlfriend has found marijuana in their car after he's been smoking in it (something no one in that house does). Her mom hasn't commented on this guy's situation yet.\n\nI really worry about the safety of the girls in their house, because their front door doesn't lock and the \"boyfriend\" refuses to talk to the girls or me, which only leads me to believe he's shady. \n\nGot any ideas as to what I should do? I want to make sure the girls are safe, and I don't want their water shut off. I'm in no position to give them money, and that's not what I want to do, but this situation really is putting stress on our relationship. I'm very ok with her venting about the situation, but I would like some answers or advice to give her. I'm really trying to be a man here, but I don't want to get too involved and take on responsibilities that I can't handle.", "summary": "My girlfriend's mom is poor, can't pay the water bill, and is letting a \"boyfriend\" who smokes pot to live there without paying rent or helping with the bills. What do I do, if anything?"}
{"id": "t3_448nrn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend's [22 M] roommate/brother [19 M] has been stealing from him for weeks, and he doesn't feel safe in his own home.", "post": "I'm mainly asking for my friend because a) the parties involved don't use reddit, and b) none of his close friends really know what to do.\n\n**Some background:** A couple months ago, my friend and former roommate (from here on referred to as B) had a call from his mom (who lives several states away) that his younger sister (we'll call her C) had been violent and abusive towards her. She had a history with drugs (meth and heroin) and theft, but her parents were unwilling to just put her out on the street. \n\nB agreed to take her in for a couple months to get her away from bad influences back home, and things were looking up. C started at a public uni with a clean slate, and B began a new job working long hours to support rent for two. C also began to identify as a male around this time (not sure if that's too relevant). Our friend group was supportive of both of them, and they would come hang out together from time to time.\n\nSeveral weeks later, B told me privately of C stealing marijuana and prescription painkillers from his (locked) room. I was shocked, because I had thought things were on the upswing judging from the few times I had seen them, but apparently C had failed every single one of his freshman classes. \n\nC began verbally abusing B and disrespecting (and stealing) his belongings in their apartment and leaving it a mess. B has replaced his locks, but confided in me that he has begun to hate living with C. His lease does not end until the 4th quarter of this year, and I hurts me to know that he works so hard for his sibling and gets treated like this in return.\n\nI've offered to keep some of his valuables at my place away from C, and couch space if he just needs to get away. I just wish that I could do more. How can I help him, reddit?", "summary": "Friend's brother moved in with him several months ago to get away from drugs and toxic relationships back home. Started well, but is spiraling back down into drugs and theft."}
{"id": "t3_3v92g6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] whose is needy around women, and seems very co dependent. **tl;dr**: Mandatory summary/question!", "post": "Dear r/Relationships,\nHey people it seems like whenever i meet a girl or pays attention to me i end up becoming really needy of their attention and in a sense co dependent. I help them with everything no matter. I also never say no and hope that things i give will make people like me. For example, at my job i get a lot of food, which i then usually give away, for 3 reasons. 1. I dont really want it, 2. i want to be nice, and 3. is because i really want people to like me and i think i can get them to do that by giving them food. \n\nIt feels like whenever i make a new friend guy or girl i keep inviting them to places or to come over for dinner, yet they also keep saying no. In my mind i think i am the stereotypical nice guy, and i realize that i just have no idea how to get out of the place and into just the guy.\n\nThanks", "summary": "19year old whose needy whenever a women is nice to him, and a sterotypical nice guy, doesnt want to be these things anymore, please help"}
{"id": "t3_1ny30e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my ?? [25 F] weeks, - she's moving faster than the Starship Enterprise.", "post": "Ok so after breaking up with my partner of 4 years last month, my friends/family encouraged me to get out there, meet folk, be merry. \n\nI did this, at the suggestion of one of my friends I joined a dating site. I met someone who despite living far away said she often visited my area for work. We had a good time chatting but honestly I just got this real strong friend vibe from it. \n\nWe casually flirted, she was really graphic on what she wanted to do, and like an awkward idiot I just kind of nodded and said \"wow great.\" \n\nWe talk everyday and she'd been hinting towards the idea that we were dating (we've never met in person). I don't know why but I was like ok and I went with it. I didn't see a harm in it. Unknown to me, she meant that we were an item, a couple if you will. I thought it meant we were two people seeing if we wanted more. I could handle that. \n\nNow she's telling me about how her sister has seen me on Facebook, her family and friends know about me, and like I haven't told anyone bar one guy about her and even that was \"Well she's nice but there's no spark.\" \n\nThe problem is, and I'm not proud of admitting this, I worry that if I say I just want to be friends I will actually lose the friendship. She is great to talk to, and we have a lot of good conversations but there's just not that spark on my end, she just feels like one of the guys to me. If I'm brutally honest, she's really helping me forget about my ex and while there's nothing romantic there I really could see us being great friends. \n\nWhat on earth do I do?", "summary": "Idiotic man failed to spot warning signs and fell into relationship he did not wish to be in, now trying to careful exit the bear trap lined ditch he has fallen into."}
{"id": "t3_41dxec", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 F] with a guy I like [30 M] three weeks, first date after meeting online - am I being unfair and sending him mixed signals?", "post": "Met up with a guy I met online and we spent pretty much the whole day together.  At one point we went to a bar and were close to each other and he started holding my knees, I enjoyed it and was surprised by how nice it felt (I haven't dated in three years). He then leaned over to kiss me and I turned my head to the side and looked down as I felt shy. He then said \"I want to kiss you\" and I kind of shook my head. Later in the night we went to another bar and he tried to kiss me again and I moved my head to the side and he kissed my cheek. Then again as he was leaving he tried to kiss me again and I said \"I'm just shy.... and it's been 3 years\" and he said \"all the more reason to let me kiss you\". We gave each other with a hug and a promise to meet again soon. I let him know when I got home and thanked him for having a lovely time and he replied he should be thanking me and he wants to meet up soon. I wonder if to some I am considered some kind of a tease or something? A friend has said I am giving mixed signals and need to make up my mind what I want.", "summary": "Me [30 F] with a guy I like [30 M] three weeks, first date after meeting online - didn't allow him to kiss me on a first date. Am I being unfair and sending him mixed signals?"}
{"id": "t3_3xrn1m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[23f] My [24m] boyfriend of 5 years refuses to help with house work.", "post": "Been together more than 5 years. Lived together 4 years. We met online and I moved 9 hours away from home to be with him.\n\nWe are currently on the market for a house. I am freaking out. There's so many things wrong with our relationship. And buying a home is such a large commitment. We are doing this because we are sick of renting an apartment that will cost us the same as a house. \n\nProblems with our relationship: He does zero chores around the house. He can't even feed our dog, or take out the trash. I constantly ask for help, in the nicest way possible, with still no help. It wouldn't be such a problem if I could handle being in a messy home, but I can't. It stresses me out to no end. I can't even sleep well knowing our apartment is dirty.\n\nIn his defense he does work A LOT. And his job isn't easy. \n\nHe is a single child and was spoiled his whole life. I am terrified it will never change. Any time I bring up my worries he makes me feel guilty. Explains how he makes \"SO much more money\" than me. That all this house work should be on me. Puts me down for not working more (I already work almost 40 hours a week). I cook dinner for him every day, meals I can't even eat (Pescetarian), keep his home spotless, and I still never receive a \"thank you\".\n\nWhen my concerns are brought up, and he knows I am close to just giving up and leaving, he will fix his problems. For a week, tops. He will clean up after himself, take out the trash, thank me for dinner. But 7 days pass and he's back to the same old shit. \n\nFive years may not seem like a lot to some, but it was a lot for me. I sacrificed my family and friends to be here with him. And I would hate to see it all go down the drain. Is there a way to fix this?", "summary": "In the process of finding a home. Afraid of the commitment with someone who won't help me with house work."}
{"id": "t3_3tginb", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by calling my best friend's grandmother a nazi", "post": "This FU happened in December of last year, so forgive me, and is possibly one of my worst.\n\nSo my very closest friend in the world (let's call him AssHat) loves to troll me. I, in turn, enjoy trolling him back. Recently, he received a dare to post something serious to his facebook as part of a prank. The way the prank works is that if somebody messages you about the serious thing you posted, you are given something by them to post on your wall. The joke spreads around like that, and is sort of stupid in my opinion. A few days later, I see he has posted to his wall \"My Grandmother went to heaven today.\" With the odd wording, and me hearing nothing of his grandma's ill health, I assumed it was another one of his prank posts to lure more people in to his silly joke. I thought it would be rather funny to mess with some of the believers in the comments of the post.\n\nI type \"Good riddance\" into the comments and, within seconds, I receive a reply from one of his friends I did not know saying \"That's horrible. Why would you say something like that?\" With a lack of better judgement, I decide not to hold back. I go on a rant spreading lies about his grandmother: \"She was a horrible person and a menace to society\", \"She even ran over my cat and never apologized\", \"I went to AssHat's house and saw alot of German WWII related items.\", \"That monster was literally a nazi!\", \"She's scum of the earth and we're better off without her.\"\n\nI felt pretty accomplished with my trolling, not even considering the possibilty his grandmother could have actually died. Later that night, I returned to facebook only to see my comments had been deleted, and AssHat's comment about the awful things I had said. Turns out his Grandmother had actually died that day, and I was the worst best friend in the world. I of course apologized profusely, and attempted to explain myself, but he was still ticked at me for a couple of days.", "summary": "I called my friend's dead grandma a nazi only hours after her death thinking it was all an elaborate joke. Yes, reddit, I am the worst friend ever."}
{"id": "t3_4v3n3g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my [29 M] freeloader. Heres a update!", "post": "**Original Post**\n\nWow, was this four months ago? crazy!\n\nAnyway, I took the advice in the comments and stopped replying to Mr. Freeloader. In short I started seeing someone else (that didn't work out but oh well! another liar for another time!) and starting ignoring Freeloaders messages. He became more desperate and would ask to see me. I suffered with a heavy blow of Glandular Fever so used that as an excuse as to why I couldn't come and see him. He made no effort to come and see me.\n\nHe launched into a massive rant about how his sheltered housing was now \"dangerous for him to live at\" because someone involved with drugs/witnessed a murder was in there for safety. He whined \"that its not exactly good for me is it? I need to know whats going on! I need to get out of here and have a safe place to stay in don't I?. He knew that my house was free as my parents were away, a massive hint drop if ever I saw one. So I brushed it off and said \"I hope you find somewhere\" as sad as I was for him, I certainly did not want him at mine outstaying his welcome and going through my things, helping himself to food and toiletries. He kept on for a few days and then obviously realised his efforts to see me and his hints were futile. \n\nSo now I haven't heard off him for the past 2 months. No calls, no texts, no Facebook messages. He's very absent on Facebook and last I saw he was moaning about not being able to play Pokemon Go on his \"POS phone\" \n\nThank you for the comments guys, I certainly do not associate with him anymore. When I tell people about him I often get back \"yea he's like that. Now you won't help him with money or lodgings he's not interested\"", "summary": "Dropped the freeloader. Now seeing a wonderful guy who has his own job, place and much more going for him. Happier and better for it."}
{"id": "t3_2twhki", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My [24M] gf [24F] of two months got a job offer far out of town and says she doesn't want to go because of me. What should I do?", "post": "This is pretty fucked. She just found out and told me about it, and they want her to start on Feb 2nd. We are going out to dinner later tonight to discuss it. In the case that this is a career making job (I will find out tonight), I almost feel like it is my responsibility to break up with her and let her go pursue her career. After all, its only been two months. The fucked thing is that I've really started falling hard for her and she told me that she loves me last time I saw her (pretty early in the relationship I know, but she definitely has extremely strong feeling for me). Is it appropriate for me to make the decision for her, as I know we are both still young, and potential career opportunities are important at this stage of life? Or should I let her make it on her own (probably stay)? Thanks in advance. I'm already starting to tear up for the first time in years.", "summary": "girlfriend got job offer far away, but doesn't want to go because of me. Should I break it off so that she can pursue her career?"}
{"id": "t3_24xeln", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 m] and my girlfriend [16 f] have been having issues.. Then she does this.. I need help.", "post": "First of all, I'm fairly new to this subreddit so I apologize if this post doesn't look like a normal one. Also, I know some might think say that I shouldn't be in a serious relationship at 16, but hear me out.\n\nSo me and my girlfriend have been dating for 10 months, and completely love eachother. But, lately we have been fighting ALOT. I think jealousy is a major cause in our problems. We fight over stupid little things, and way too often. Last week, we discussed our issues and both came to the conclusion that we weren't happy, and should possibly take a break. Ok, thats fine. \n\nNext, is where I need help. \n\nBefore we dated, she had been dating a guy for awhile and she claims that she had in fact been in love with him. Fast forward back to now, he just became single again, and they (my SO and him) have began talking again. They had never really talked while he had a girlfriend (No, I know she was not secretly talking to him). \n\nShe tells me that she (very recently) had talked to him about our relationship problems, and basically getting comfort from him, but she still claims that she has no feelings for him, past being a friend. \n\nHe knows that I absolutely hate him, yet he told my gf \"I dont want to interfere with your relationship with OP\". She even told him that I need to get over the fact that they (Ex and my girlfriend) are friends. \n\nI really dont know what to do. I love this girl like no other, but I really dont think I could handle the jealousy of them being friends.\n\nSorry for this being so long.", "summary": "OP goes on a \"break\" with SO. SO begins talking to an ex of hers. OP can't handle SO being friends with said ex."}
{"id": "t3_2hg0kk", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Quick question about websites like Kayak, Travelocity and the like.", "post": "Hi all. I'm doing a brief project for a class in which we plan a weeklong vacation within a certain region (traveling from NYC to Tunis, Tunisia and then to Fez, Morocco and then to Marrakech and then back to NYC again, but it's not really relevant to the question).\n\nThe thing is, like in real travel, she's given us a budget and my hypothetical expenses are adding up. I only need a one-way flight to my initial city - in this case, Tunis - and I need to include pricing for accommodations. I'm setting the dates for sometime in June, if it's relevant.\nI'm under the impression that you'd save some significant money doing a flight + hotel package, but everything I see offered on the websites includes round trips only, as far I can see. It wouldn't make sense for me to backtrack to Tunisia once I travel to Morocco. The budget is $4,000 USD for everything not including meals.", "summary": "Do any websites offer one way flights and hotel packages? Would it make a big difference in the expenses anyway? Also interested in adding a car to the package."}
{"id": "t3_35l8js", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[19/m] do I have a chance of reconciliation with [19/f]?", "post": "Me and my ex broke up 2.5 months ago, due to her feeling very stressed out due to having so much going on, which made her decide she wasn't ready for a relationship. We had slight contact after that, but 4 weeks ago I went strict no contact to move on. She messaged me 2 weeks into it, cause she was pissed off that I deleted her from social media, but then decided that that's my decision so she'd respect it.\n\nI went straight back to nc until a week later, she messaged me, apologising for being so horrible since the breakup to me, and told me how much she missed me and how upset she was, she said about how showing feelings has never been a strong point for her, so she found it too hard to show them. She told me how sorry she was, and how she wished it worked out differently, and was really hoping that we'd be friends. After this, I told her that maybe things will be different again soon, to which she agreed. She then made the conversation for the rest of the night, which is good, we hadn't had any proper conversation in a long time and it felt good to speak, in fact, we discussed things that got between us towards the end, and it's clear that won't be a problem anymore! we've spoken every day since.\n\nMy problem is, I don't know if she's interested still, it seems it, but like I said, she isn't good at expressing feelings, and she's always been quite a blunt texter. I want to arrange dinner somewhere, just a small catch up, and hopefully it'd lead to try working on slowly becoming more than friends again, maybe not however, but as I have no clue on what she feels, I don't know if asking would be a good idea or not! I don't want to ask and make things awkward if she doesn't want to, I'd only be asking for an innocent catch up, so surely I don't know why she'd say no if it were to just be friends, but I'm still very nervous about it.", "summary": "me and ex speaking every day as friends, want to ask to meet up over lunch, but she's bad at showing feelings so I'm unsure whether she's interested or not."}
{"id": "t3_1rxfr6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Angry people of Reddit, have you ever destroyed, mysteriously disappeared or given away for free some of your SO favorite stuff out of anger?", "post": "Last night i went to Walmart to buy my niece a present, on the way out, as I'm walking to my truck i see a giant imperial AT-AT toy (Star Wars fans will know what I'm talking about) along with various other toys, all from Star Wars, disassembled in a shopping cart. As soon as i saw them i walked directly towards the cart, when the parking lot attendant asked me if i wanted to take them, that Some lady took them out of her car, said her husband doesn't need them anymore, all you need to do is put them together. The loot is well worth over 400$ US of Hasbro toys.", "summary": "last night i found in a parking lot over 400$ US worth of Star Wars toys a lady wanted to get rid of because her husband didn't need them anymore."}
{"id": "t3_386f1z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My best friend [19 F] is starting to not hang out with me [19 M] because the thinks it's wrong...?", "post": "So I met her about a year and a half ago at college. She had a boyfriend, but we were always platonic. We still are. So up until this summer, we would eat every day multiple times a day, and hang out constantly since she was away from home and her boyfriend. Now she's back home, and I happened to be going near her so I asked if she wants to get lunch. She told me she thinks it's wrong for me and her to eat lunch together alone since she has a boyfriend. I really don't get it. We ate together literally every day for like 9 months, mostly just her and I since we didn't have many friends. We've also talked at least once a day since summer started. So it's not like we're just not friends anymore.. And I can't just ask her why she thinks that, because she's always been super sensitive about her relationship. She said she would eat with me and her boyfriend, but I'm not her boyfriends friend, I hardly know him. I'm her friend... So does anyone have any clue what's going on?", "summary": "Friend doesn't want to get lunch with me because she thinks it would be \"wrong\" since she has a boyfriend. Super confused."}
{"id": "t3_2oucva", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My date [M/28] tried to kick me [21/F] off the bed?", "post": "I write this one mainly to chanel my frustration, but also because I'm confused as hell whether this is so inappropriate I should treat it like a major red flag.\n\nI've been on some dates with this guy, and the last couple of times I stayed over at his place. He doesn't have a double-sized bed, only two person-sized beds, so after doing the deed, and falling asleep right next to each other I usually just move over to the other bed (mainly because he starts spazzing and snoring).\n\nThis last time we were out drinking, so we came back to his place drunk (me more than him), undressed and got into bed fast. As I said I usually can't stay the night next to him, but thanks to the booze this wasn't a problem now, I slept like a baby. I still woke up once or twice when I felt I was almost falling down the bed, and once when he climbed over me to get to the other bed.\n\nWhen I wake up in the morning, I look at him on the other bed, and he's there playing with his phone with a really stern look on his face, and giving me the stink eye. I understood I probably did something in my sleep, like snoring or kicking, so I said \"Sorry, did I chase you away? I've been sleeping so deep I wasn't feeling anything if you were poking me or something\", and he answers \"Yeah, I didn't have enough space so I tried kicking you off, but didn't succeed, so I had to move from my *own* bed.\" I would think he was kidding, but his tone was really serious, and he was still giving me this cold look. I tried to talk about it, but then he just brushed it off, and sat down to work, ignoring me for maybe another hour (while I was still lying in his bed, I'm horrible!). \n\nNow everything's alright and peaceful, but what the actual fuck was that? Who does that?", "summary": "Guy tries to kick me to the wooden floor for taking up much place in my sleep, and then keeps sulking the following day"}
{"id": "t3_1t9r7k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend said he was going to \"wingman\" his friend?", "post": "We're both 20, I'm a female, he's a male, we've been dating for a little over a year.\n\nMy boyfriend was talking with a couple guys about what he was going to do for his buddy's birthday.  The guys asked if he was going to wingman his buddy, and my boyfriend said \"No, he has a girlfriend!\" and then he smiled and said, \"Well, we'll wingman him anyway!\"\n\nI asked him what he meant by that later, and if he just flirts with girls when I'm not around, and he said that it was just guy talk and that his buddy doesn't love his girlfriend like he loves me.  I know that my boyfriend rarely even talks to other girls and I trust him, but that comment rubbed me the wrong way... Should I be worried?", "summary": "Boyfriend said he wanted to wingman his buddy even though his buddy has a gf...is this just guy talk or should I be worried?"}
{"id": "t3_46ar0w", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Update] Indiana Oral Lease?", "post": "Here is the OP: \n\nI spoke with an attorney. His legal advice was that we did not have a lease but it would be best to keep this out of court.\n\nI agreed completely. I wanted legal advice before the meeting in case things went pear shaped.\n\nI came to an agreement with the landlord. We are going to pay Jan/Feb and call it a day. \n\nI always set personal feelings aside when it comes to making decisions for the business I own. My feelings don't matter, I have to do what is best for the business. What was best was settling this matter to ensure that my manufacturing space was not put into jeopardy.", "summary": "Retained an attorney, followed his advice. Business is safe but had to pay a bit for it. Lesson learned, my landlord is shady."}
{"id": "t3_3s39yl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my girlfriend [21F] - LDR for 3.5 years, we've never fought before", "post": "Hello /r/relationships! I'm afraid I don't have anything dramatic to entertain you with, just some minor nagging questions I'm looking for some advice on.\n\nSome background: I've been with my girlfriend for a little over 3.5 years. We started dating right before we both left for university about 7 hours apart. Although long distance hasn't been much fun, we do our best to see each other as much as we can during the summer and winter breaks. The relationship is great, minus the distance -- I feel like I love her more and more every day, I've never felt so connected to someone else in my life. Someday down the road, I think I'd like to ask her to marry me.\n\nHere's the thing: it almost seems *too* perfect sometimes, you know? We have never had a fight, not even a small one, and I can't help but worry about it sometimes. It's probably silly, but I don't know if we're just really good at preempting conflict or if we just naturally always get along or if it's a \"calm before the storm\" situation or what. Hopefully, we'll be able to move in together in about a year, and I just wonder if suddenly everything will be different. I mean, it will be, obviously, but what if we're not as good at living together as we are at living apart?\n\nSo basically, I'd just like to hear from others who've been in peaceful relationships and/or long-term LDRs and how those turned out when the distance dropped to zero.", "summary": "Never had a fight with long distance girlfriend, wondering if that means anything worrisome or if I should just be grateful. Also wondering about the transition from being long distance to finally moving in together and how that could potentially change the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_51abc3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] in a tough spot with my coworker [21F]", "post": "I posted here a couple weeks ago about how I thought my coworker might be interested in me. Turns out that I was right. Just two days ago she went ahead and kissed me. I went along with it because I didn't know what else I could do.\n\n She told me she doesn't care that I'm younger than her. But I do slightly feel bothered that she's much older. I'm supposed to be meeting her for lunch in a few hours but I also feel hesitant about going. I don't want to hurt her or use her for anything. I don't feel comfortable about starting a relationship with her either since I'm still recovering from a break up that happened a few months back. She's a really good person and there's nothing wrong about her. But I'm not over my ex completely yet. I feel like a horrible person for kissing her back, but I really didn't want to hurt her feelings in any way.\n\nI can't end everything with her either, or else it'll be too awkward at work. I just don't know what to do or what to say. What would you guys do in a situation like this?", "summary": "My coworker is interested in me but i dont know how to tell her that I dont want a relationship without hurting her feelings."}
{"id": "t3_43yz6n", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Tifu By not reading the time", "post": "This isnt a bad fuck up since i had time to stop off at McDonalds for breakfast. But still a good fu.  Last night I stayed up later than normal. 3 hours later than normal. Skip 6 hours my alarm went off, I hit dismiss. 45 minutes later my 2nd and final alarm went off, I do my usual routine of got to the bathroom, take a whizz, do my teeth. Now I go back to my room and pick out some clean underwear and a towel. I lay on my bed, switch on the morning news and drift back to sleep..  Now where the fuck up begins. The usual time i have to set off to work is 8:15 am and the latest time I can set off without being late for work is 8:25. I wake up and check the time. See the time is half past the hour. I didn't check which hour. But it was half past. I panic, call the taxi company and ask for an urgent taxi. Usually when I'm late there is a 15 minute delay. Today is not the case. The taxi is waiting outside my house in 5 minutes. I think this is a little odd given the morning rush but just forget about it in the panic of wanting to get to work on time. Whilst in the taxi I check my phone. Then it hit me. I'm an hour early. The time was 7:30. That's when it hit me. I'd fucked up. I was at work a whole hour early.", "summary": "Let myself watch tv whilst tired. Fell asleep. Thought I was late for work. Called a taxi urgently. Ended up at work a whole hour early."}
{"id": "t3_pgiu4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "On the subject of the circlejerk/elitist dichotomy.", "post": "In the past day or so I've come across some rather troubling sights. One of which I saw in r/vinyl, the only sub I tend to visit with due regularity. There, a redditor made a thread to discuss the mastering of an album compared to it's digital counterpart. He was met with a response that it sounded 'funny' because the band sucked. The antagonist to the OP then went on a thorough, but juvenile, nit picking of his distaste for said band. It lead OP to call r/vinyl 'r/elitistmusiccirclejerk'. While the sub can be helpful in discussion of vinyl and listening tips, it's also a place where people share their collections, to the jargon of a good few.\n\nLast night in r/music I was reading comments in a thread wherein OP had up to enough with people posting popular music. Others suggested that he check out various, more specified subs. This was met with people saying that sharing links to other subs leads those of 'inferior' tastes to their smaller subs, ruining them.\n\nThe same can be said of just about any sub that deals in pictures. Particularly r/WTF, which 'goes back to it's roots' about once a month instead of people just going to something more suitable. Any sub that hits more than a few thousand subscribers seems doomed to turn in such a way.\n\nI find it disheartening that people feel this way. That some will complain about the content of a sub and others well be upset when alternatives are proposed. Seeing as Reddit is a community based in connection and sharing, with many options available to provide with an acceptable feed, I find the battle between those that circlejerk (post what they like, and know others will) is met with such fierce elitism (a hatred/dislike of those who appreciate similarities, even on a base level).\n\nHow do you feel about this? Discuss!", "summary": "I often see a tug of war between people that are perceived 'base' tastes (circlejerkers) and those who see themselves as superior (elitists). How do you feel seeing this happen in your favorite subs?"}
{"id": "t3_15o00t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need help with not letting my (31M) past relationship experience ruin this awesome one w (25F)", "post": "So I am a 31 y/o M and have been dating a 25 y/o F for 5 months now.  We have a fantastic relationship, and she really is everything I could ever want from a woman.  She's smart, funny, caring, and most importantly accepts me for who I am, and loves me for who I am.  I am 2 years removed from an 11 year relationship with a woman who was the basically her opposite..  she was overbearing, funny but at my expense, selfish, and tried to make me who she thought I should be..  In the end, she cheated on me with a friend of mine for several months before we split up and I was left not even knowing who i was anymore and seriously depressed.  Fast forward to now and I am truly happy.  I love spending time with my current gf, and honestly can see myself spending my life with her.  She feels the same for me.  Everything is for lack of a better word perfect. My issue is that I have this underlying trust issue now due to my experience with my ex.  I have explained the situation to my current, and she is VERY understanding.  She does everything she can to make sure I am comfortable and at ease with situations.  I seriously have no reason to not trust her, and I DO trust her to be honest.  It's more of a self-worth issue I think, this little voice in my head telling me that this amazing woman is too good for me and will realize it one day and dump me.  So how do I get over this annoying nagging voice?  I don't want my own internal issues to cause problems down the road.", "summary": "Was in a shitty 11 year relationship that ended with her cheating on me for months.  Now in a fantastic relationship with an amazing woman, but I have internal trust issues due to my ex. "}
{"id": "t3_mjyg4", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "What do you use for flea control?", "post": "My family has tried literally EVERYTHING to control the fleas in our neighborhood (Frontline, Advantage, Diatomaceous Earth, Dawn Dishsoap, etc!) and nothing has worked. I have spoken to lots of pet owners in my area (I work as a vet assistant) and many are reporting similar results, where fleas are becoming resistant to the usually recommended treatments. The only thing that has worked so far is Comfortis, but I've read of several dogs having reactions to it that can be pretty severe. My dogs are fine, we've used it for about a year now, but I don't like the idea of harming them or putting them at risk. \n\nGiving them baths with blue Dawn dish soap does kill all the fleas, but it does nothing to prevent more from coming back, obviously. It only kills on contact, and we are NOT going to over bath them because that isn't healthy either. We're looking for something that lasts.\n\nDoes anyone else have experience with this, or any detailed information on Comfortis and if it does serious damage to your pet's system? Yes, I know I am a vet assistant. My boss strictly recommends Frontline and literally will not listen to me when I tell him it doesn't work and my dogs are still covered in fleas and we have to use Comfortis because it is the only thing that gives them relief. He is not a resource in this case. \n\nJust wanted to see what other pet owners (specifically ones in San Diego) do for fleas...the ones we have here are mutants or something, because almost nothing works on them!", "summary": "the fleas in our town are becoming resistant to generic flea treatments like frontline; comfortis is the only thing that works but can have serious side effects. Just looking for more info on Comfortis or possible alternatives."}
{"id": "t3_42dwva", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] getting flirty/talking a lot with [~20 F] roommate of high school friend (different schools)", "post": "So, to get right to the point, a friend of mine goes to a school about 2 hours away from mine, so I visit around once a quarter, sometimes more. The past two times (around November and 1 week ago) I've stayed at her house and gotten pretty friendly with one of her roommates. Nothing physical but just getting to know each other and a bit of flirting. Now in the last week we've been snapchatting quite a bit, again nothing too risque but definitely some flirting. \n\nI guess my basic question is, what would be the best way to \"escalate\" the relationship? Of course I would be down for a casual hook-up, but I think even better would be to start an actual relationship, which I don't have much experience with.\n   \nTangential question: what are some good ways to flirt via text/snapchat that doesn't come across as weird or over-eager?\n\nOr should I just play it cool and not try any escalation until I visit again?\n\nLet me know if more information is necessary, I'll do my best to provide anything.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "How do I escalate a semi-long distance relationship that is nothing more than talking and snapchatting at the moment?"}
{"id": "t3_2kkqbg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I get out of this situation?", "post": "Just started my first university year. It's been around 5-6 weeks and would enjoy it a lot more if not for this issue.\n\nBasically this girl likes me on my course and I don't like her back in the same way. I see her as just a friend - nothing more. She asks me to wait for her before lessons and I do, being her mate and everything. \n\nHowever, a lot of people on the course seem to think we're going out and I want to dispel this rumour as soon as possible. \n\nAny sort of help would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "girl on course likes me. I don't. Everybody else thinks we're going out. How do I make them think otherwise?"}
{"id": "t3_4roqly", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22m] want to know how to better comfort and support the people I love.", "post": "Hello /r/relationships,\n\nRecently a close friend of mine has been going through a tough time and I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing to offer support. Most of my friends or family I contact through text or messenger so touching or bringing food or anything of actually being there is out of the picture. Sometimes they are also many miles away. \n\nI know the classic \"Do you want to talk about it?\" Or \"Just know I'm here for you\" lines but what the heck does that even mean? What usually happens is I say those things, they say something, I say sorry you are feeling that way, then they say something else and I'm stuck for words. I can't just keep saying sorry over and over. There's just so many times I can say \"Oh no.. :(\" or \"That's not good.. :/\" I know being supportive and comforting means to listen and be there, but I just find it really difficult when it's all in text and I'm not able to just hold them or just nod and give them my full attention. \n\nCan you guys please tell me how I can be the best support I can be?? The do's and don'ts.", "summary": "I'd like to know how to provide support and comfort to the ones I love when texting or messaging is the only option."}
{"id": "t3_xvlju", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Can someone find my mojo?", "post": "I'm admitting I've been very lazy the past 2.5 months.  I haven't done any runs.  I haven't been to the gym. \n\nI'm most upset about the no running.  That was my \"me time\".  I recently had a major change in my daily routine. I went from not working or doing anything during the day for the past two years... to being a nanny for 7 weeks from 6am-5pm and then working at a local retail store.... to then finding a full time job that is PERFECT for me.  \n\nI'm having a really hard time adjusting to the schedule and simply put... I just don't want to do anything when I get home from work. \n\nIts also summer on Long Island and its like a sauna 90% of the days.  The air is thick and humid. \n\nI don't know if part of my issue is also that I'm not eating correctly and taking my supplements lately.  I'm a gastric bypass patient.  Almost 15 months post op.  Down 188lbs.  I feel like my body is done losing and I think that is also part of my problem. \n\nI feel like I need an ass kicking or a reboot.  \n\nI need my mojo back.  I need to get back on the pavement.  I miss it.  My body misses it.  My back has been killing me and I know its because I'm not releasing the tension.  \n\nI'm just having a hard time getting back into it.", "summary": "Major change to my daily routine.  Need to run but too lazy/tired.  Making excuses.  Someone kick my ass please."}
{"id": "t3_s1qza", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Needing help with an absent father", "post": "I have never had a solid relationship with my father. The relationship I have had is also pretty depressing. I have seen him in person four times and not once in the last 10 years (I'm 19). When I was younger, he would send birthday presents and Christmas gifts, but throughout the years, the letters and gifts stopped coming. Then, the phone calls stopped too. From fourth to ninth grade I was so confused that I did nothing. I was too young to even comprehend what was happening and that it wasn't my fault. In 9th grade, I decided I would give him a call. When I did, we talked for a little while and of course he promised to call more often. However, he never called again. Four years later (my first year in college) I decided to call him. \n\nI had found out he attended the same school I do now, only to flunk out after 6 weeks. When I called him, we talked for hours and kept in contact over the next couple months. One day he called me crying and saying he was so sorry for everything and he wants so badly to be in my life now. However, that seemed to change when I flew up to Washington to visit him and he stopped answering my calls and never returned any of the calls after I left to go back to school. To be the adult, I sent him a letter explaining I would have a relationship at whatever rate he felt comfortable with and today, I received a response.\n\nHe rambled on for SIX pages of writing about absolutely nothing. He even had the nerve to say that the only person who has loved him these last two decades has been his new wife. I want so badly to have a relationship with my father but at the same time I am so incredibly angry at him for everything he's put me through. I've been to therapy for this all but I still have no idea what to do or say to him.", "summary": "Should I tell my dad how I really feel or just proceed to cover up my anger so I can have a relationship with him? Help."}
{"id": "t3_39dt1z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Meeting someone online that lives long distance SAFELY? [me: 22, him 19]", "post": "So I met this guy semi-recently. On Tinder. We only matched because he's been down south for his monthly army-whatever, which is only a few miles from my house. We've been talking and snapping constantly for a bit now and he would like to meet up and go out on a date. The thing isss that he actually lives in an apartment a good few hours away. It seems silly to drive so far for a dinner [even a dinner and a movie] and then drive all the way home.  \n\nSoo what do you do in this situation? I would love to stay up there for a night on the couch or whatever and then hang out again the next day. But the possibility of unsafe people is so ingrained that I'm kind of terrified to. Probably for good reason.  \n\nBut I get pretty good vibes off this guy. The way he talks, the things he says. I know his full name and address and he doesn't know either of mine. I know he isn't lying about name cause I've seen probably a hundred snaps by now with his name on his uniform. We aren't fb friends but I did stalk him and I liked the things I saw and the things he has on there. I would also like to clarify that I'm not worried about what to do if I just don't end up being interested. I can handle that fine but I am worried about safety.   \n\nI genuinely **feel** safe. But I also know how unpredictable and potentially harmful this shit can be. I have a badass cutthroat knife I carry, as well as mace. And have three friends [i could find even more if I wanted] that are down to be my safe call. Soo what do I do? What are my options? Is it **so** naive of me to think this is potentially an okay idea or what? Is there anything I can do to be **more** safe? Or can you guys offer up other options for me? I do nottt have the funds to pay for a hotel right now and probably won't till fall time. So what do I do?", "summary": "Guy lives hours away. Seems silly to drive so far for a dinner and then drive all the way home. Is staying the night an option at all or am I basically retarded for thinking that's okay?"}
{"id": "t3_3zb3yx", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "sublease scammer (central pa)", "post": "Hi everyone at /r/legaladvice[1] I hope you are having a good new years.\nI am currently under going a sublease scammer, that coincides with the information here.\n\nBasically how the scam works is that they don't ever contact you over phone, but by email. When sent an email they ask for your information. Name, phone number, address. After providing this info to them, they then send a bank certified check.\nThey overpay you and eventually ask you to send the remainder of the money.\nThe check eventually clears out to be fake. And the money that you sent to them is now is in their hands while you won't be paid by the fake check.\nI want to scam the scammers. I will be leaving the country to not return. Maybe return to the US in about 5 years.... Do you think I can scam the scammers without recourse?\n\nI've been exchanging texts with this person and they are still committing to the ruse.", "summary": "Certified check was sent to me, 100% scam. I want to scam the scammers. Will I get in trouble for scamming the scammers?"}
{"id": "t3_140gj0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I get jealous when my BF watches porn (23M/23F)", "post": "We have been together for 2 years. When we first got together he had never had a proper gf before and mostly slept around. I knew he was a huge fan of porn and in the first few months of the relationship I was fine with it. Once we got to know each other more I was able to express my feelings about his porn watching and he told me I was being insecure and that the girls didn't compare to me. However, I offer him sex or blowjobs every day.\n\nHe knows how upset I get and burst into tears when I found out he had searched porn. He told me he doesn't deserve me because I'm \"such a good person\" but to be honest, I don't feel I am because I made him feel this way. I don't ever want to see him like that again and it took me by total surprise. The only reason I get so upset about it is because he knows the names of porn actressess and searches them. This makes it more personal to me. I noticed he has liked the actressess on facebook which really annoys me. I get jealous of him jerking off to Divas in WWE.\n\nI wish I didn't feel this way and I don't want him to feel this way either. If it's what he wants to do then I have no right to stop him. I can't help how I feel about it and it will never go. Sometimes I think I need to find someone who doesn't watch it at all. I love this boy more than anything and he has stopped watching it because he loves me too but I don't feel right about it.\n\nI understand it's common for people of our day and age to jerk off to porn. It upsets me him looking at them. Maybe if it was more random I wouldn't mind so much but he searches for women with massive asses and huge tits. This makes me feel more insecure because I don't have either.\n\nPlease provide some advice to help me stop being so jealous.", "summary": "I'm upset about my bf watching porn but understand he should be able to do what he wants with his own body. Please help me so I'm not so jealous."}
{"id": "t3_20rtpl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My depressed divorced mother [55 F] can't let it go - what can I [27 F] do?", "post": "She and my father divorced 3 years ago under (relatively) amicable terms.  He was married again within 1-2 years.  They speak very rarely.\n\nThe issue is this: she is very depressed and can't move on with her life.  She's relatively functional in her professional life, but she's made it clear she misses having someone to talk to the way that she talked to my dad (both are very smart people, and she has a hard time getting that with her friendships and colleagues).  She has a tendency to drink too much and I catch her with 'bummed' cigarettes.  She's made a few attempts at online dating, but has always found her dates to be dull or socially inept or uninteresting.  Personally, I think the problem stems from the fact that she has been with my father since she was 19 and therefore never had to develop dating skills...she's probably shy and would rather avoid it.  Not to mention that exuding unhappiness makes you a pretty dull date!\n\nI'm worried because I'm moving to a different state soon and I want her to be on an upswing before I leave.  She's halfheartedly tried therapy and stays on antidepressants for a while but it never seems to go anywhere.  I think the bottom line is that she's unhappy, has low self worth, and is exceedingly picky about men.  What can I do to move her in the right direction?  I know that this has to come from within, but it's driving me insane watching her wallow in sadness.  I want to be sensitive but it seems so obvious she just needs to toughen up, put herself out there, and realize that she deserves happiness!", "summary": "Sad mother divorced 3 yrs ago.  Lonely and misses company but won't date.  How can I push her in the right direction?"}
{"id": "t3_4kpime", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 F]have a [24 F] roommate with anxiety, what have I gotten into? How do I fix it?", "post": "Backstory, I am moving out for the first time, spent some time home saving up money and all that good stuff. I've never had a roommate. I have no idea what this all entails, but I assume(d) that the general rules of relationships would apply. My Roommate is a friend(yes, I know...\"she won't be your friend after living together\") However, her anxiety and personal issues have resulted in some issues....\n\n    Having my boyfriend over, for example. We are private people and generally stay in my room reading books together. However, my roommate screamed that he is not allowed over at all, because it would make her uncomfortable. Now, I am paying my fair share of rent, we've split it evenly, even though she gets the bigger room. I feel that I should be allowed to have him sleep over on occasion so long as he isn't disruptive, noisy, peeing on the toilet seat, or putting the TP under instead of over. We have currently negotiated 4 days a month. She also does not want my friends over, ever.\n\n    I originally had plans to move in on Thursday/Friday, however due to last minute plans, I had to switch to Friday/Sunday. This resulted in us being there together Sunday. I was met with stomping everywhere she went and silence to any questions I asked....She is now saying that there will never, ever, be plan changes ever again. The first plan is the only plan. I have tried reasoning with her, telling her that she could have told me no to moving in Sunday, instead of throwing a temper tantrum, but she is set. When I tried reasoning with her, she told me that clearly I cannot think like an adult, therefore she is taking away my privileges to change plans. Lunch plans, dinner plans, general hanging out plans....etc. Meanwhile, she has bailed on me nearly every single time we make plans together, often only an hour or two before.\n\n    What have I gotten myself in to??? How can I navigate this to come to a compromise with someone so unwilling? I'm already stuck with this, since the lease is signed. I just need a way to make the best of it.", "summary": "My  roommate suffers from anxiety and as a result has become unreasonable, and taken away my \"plan changing privileges,\" since I allegedly cannot think like an adult. She is also denying my ability to have the boyfriend or friends over."}
{"id": "t3_3u04zk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [23F] stop feeling nostalgic and sad whenever I see reminders of my ex [24M], who was my first?", "post": "We dated for 4 years and were FWB for about a year and a half afterwards. We were each other's firsts for almost everything. I've recently started seeing a new guy [20M] and I really think it has potential to go somewhere. Unfortunately, my ex also recently told me that he has started to have feelings for me again (after I essentially \"waited\" for him for a long time). I didn't have the same feelings back so I went no-contact with him yesterday. \n\nToday, I saw that he had blocked me on FB and probably everywhere else. It instantly solidified what was happening and I felt a pang of nostalgia. When will this go away, if ever? He has been in almost half my life and a quarter of them essentially with him. Realistically, I know it's going to be hard to get over your first love and that I will occasionally have these nostalgic and sad thoughts ... but what things can I do to show my new man that he is the one for me?", "summary": "went no-contact with ex after 4 years dating and 1.5 years fwb - feeling nostalgic about reminders of the \"us\" but really want to show new bf that he is the one for me :)"}
{"id": "t3_jq2xw", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Dear Reddit, superglued my wedding ring to my foot. Need help.", "post": "If you're married, you'll understand.\n\nI was attempting to fix part of the bathroom mirror.  My wife, whom I love very much, heckled me a bit and joked about how I'd glue my hands together.  I don't want to give her the satisfaction of being right (as she always is).  Esp. when it comes to my abilities as a handyman.\n\nLong story short, while opening the superglue bottle, I poked the front and squeezed and it shot out and nailed my hand, ankle and foot. I was trying to reduce the damage and took off my ring and proceeded to try to wipe away the mess. Next thing I know, the ring is glued to my foot pretty darn good.  I tried to pull it off but it broke skin and caused a bit of bleeding. I just want to get this off before she comes back.  Need a way to dissolve the glue safely ASAP.", "summary": "Superglued wedding ring to food, dog ate it and I need to figure out how to stitch up the dog before police arrive."}
{"id": "t3_51tnyw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24m] having existential stress regarding my girlfriend of 8 months [20f].", "post": "So my gf and I have, for the most part, been doing great. We've said the \"i love you\"s and have awesome times together.\n\nMy main problem is that she is very independent and it leaves me feeling uncared for. For example, today we had lunch plans. I texted her a reminder and she said she already ate because she was hungry but that i could meet her at the library to hang out a bit. I feel fed up because many times she has set up a date only to cancel it or change it without seeming to think of me. \n\nI believe she isnt doing it purposefully and is just self focused. Still, i feel like im constantly stressed about our relationship and cant get a good read on what she is feeling. I want to get through to her but when i try to talk about our relarionship i just feel like im spoiling the mood. My question is: should i just accept this as part of her? Or is it worth fighting about? I consistently feel neglected but i know she loves me. Maybe im just too emotionally dependent.", "summary": "Gf is very independent, doesn't seem to realize my needs aren't being met. Not sure if im just too needy."}
{"id": "t3_3hntcg", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "How concerned should I be about making sure a new business name is available?", "post": "About 2 years ago I took up homebrewing as a hobby and recently I've been thinking about giving my operation a name and investigate possibly going pro a few years down the road if everything goes well. \n\nI recently thought of a name I love, but a short Google search shows that some homebrewer has already used the brewery name on untappd.com and brewshuttle.com. It appears that the only person interacting with him/her are friends and family. Neither account has been used in at least 12 months. I've already checked the surrounding states for similar businesses or trademarks and came up with no results. Should the few uses on the websites be enough to make me rethink the name? Or is this worth pursuing?", "summary": "If someone used a business name on some online websites a year ago but hasn't registered it with a state authority, is it worth investigating using that name for a new business?"}
{"id": "t3_2rwyz6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [18/F] am in a very weird relationship with my friend [18/M] right now...", "post": "Me and him started out as friends, then it became a little bit more.\n\nA bit of background information about myself. I do not want to enter into romantic relationships, ever. I want to remain friends with him, and that is my final resolve. However, at my age, of course, I want to have sex.\n\nLast night was the first time we \"slept\" together. No, we did not have sex; we simply slept in the same bed while hugging each other I suppose. Yes, why indeed did I allow this to happen if I want to remain friends with him... Well to be truthful, the whole time, my mind was on sex. I wanted him to touch me. The problem is, I feel like he wants more than a casual \"friends with benefit\" relationship. He was extremely careful not to touch me unless I implied that it was ok. I don't believe I have actual romantic feelings for him because my genitalia seems to be the only thing dictating my actions.\n\nBaseline is, I want to remain friends with my male friend but my hormones are leading him on. I want to have sex, but he thinks otherwise.\n\nWhat the fuck do I do.", "summary": "I want to be friends with a guy, but my sexual urges are leading him into thinking I want something more--what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4v9odb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I (F22) an asshole for dating my ex's (24m) kind of best friend (22m)?", "post": "So I broke up with my ex a month ago, relationship was 10 months. Was absolutely amazing, we were so compatible and my silly fantasies actually made me really believe he was the one (still feel that way). But there was a pretty major dealbreaker that I couldn't overlook (not relevant) and we split up. Tried to be friends but currently not talking (my idea) because I thought we needed space from each other to get over the break up. With the expectation that we'd try to be friends again in the future. \n\nEnter mutual friend who has been there for both of us throughout this whole break up. My ex and I both tell him everything, both vent to him, etc. He's our go to when we need to talk to someone. I met him before I met my ex but this friend, John, was friends with my ex longer than with me (we all worked together). So two completely independent friendships. Anyway on to the issue....\n\nJohn has really been making some moves lately and one day while we were smoking he just kissed me. John told me there was no way he was telling my ex and assured me that this would only be strictly casual (which I'm okay with).\n\nI guess my question here is am I a terrible person for not telling my ex? Or for even considering this with John? I just can't help but think that I don't want to hurt my ex at all and I know he would be if he finds out that the guy he confides in about us and his loneliness is hooking up with his ex. I still love him more than anything so I guess I already know the answer but I could still use the input.", "summary": "Mutual friend with ex wants to date casually without ex knowing. Should I tell him? Or tell John to tell him? Or should I not even consider this?  "}
{"id": "t3_4s48xo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "my (25f) Dad (48m) is having a baby with a girl two years younger than me (23f obviously) and I am just broken hearted over if. I can't lose him but I can't forgive him either.", "post": "So as short as I can make it, I've always been super close with my Dad. My mom was clinically crazy and we were both the victims of her abuse until she finally took off and left us when I was 13. I've always felt that it's been he and I against the world. \n\nWhen I got home for 4th of July I knew he was nervous and avoiding something important. And then bam out of the blue a young girl shows up at the house and she's his girlfriend. Yay!! Oh and not only that they've been dating since January and the cherry of everything...she's due in October. \n\nOnce my dad relaxed and I caught my breath and the week settled in (my dad was very respectful of my opinion and pre-arranged for her to stay with her family---who apparently approve of this situation) I could tell he was very happy and excited, in fact more so than I'd seen him in years. When I discussed the details he said that she worked as an intern at one of his suppliers and thier age difference actually gave them something to talk about as opposed to it being an obstacle. She's in college, she comes from a good family and she's made it clear that prior to them getting marrried, we all meet with a lawyer so my dad's estate is fair to all of us. So at least by her word she's a decent person who is not after my Dads money.\n\nAll of this would be awesome if she were 45, 40 or even 35...but she's 23. And it just seems weird. And it makes me sad and it makes me feel like I'm losing him. I'm having a hard time forgiving him for taking \"him\" away from me. \n\nI would LOVE any help.", "summary": "My Dad is dating a girl younger than me and she's pregnant. He seems happy and she seems like a good person but it just seems do wrong and I'm so hurt by it."}
{"id": "t3_3kxcp1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by spraying insect repellent on my hat.", "post": "This happened a couple of months ago, when it was still reasonably warm here in Alaska. Up here, the state bird is the mosquito, they are vicious and come in unrelenting waves. One can only protect themselves with copious amounts of bug-dope.\n\nSo we were out camping and I was fed up with all of the bugs still biting my face during the night, and I had a wonderful idea to drench my fleece cap in bug spray to hopefully stave them off. I proceeded to get into my sleeping bag and pull my fleece cap over my eyes to block the sun. \n\nFast forward to the morning. I wake up feeling wonderful, I just need to rub the sleep out of my eyes. So I give my sockets a good palm rub and stretch my back a little. Upon opening my eyes again, I still cannot see anything, it's like I'm looking through the plastic sheeting into one of Dexter's kill rooms. I start to panic and rub my eyes frantically, only to make it worse because now it hurts and I can't see. So I ran over to our water container and dosed my face with water for a while, it didn't help much, but I started regaining my vision slowly.  \n\nIt took about 3 hours butIt has returned to normal, needless to say, I have learned a valuable lesson.", "summary": "Sprayed insect repellent on my hat that I pulled over my eyes to sleep with, woke up in a blind mess of pain and confusion."}
{"id": "t3_4ei3vt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friends think it's weird that I (26/f) haven't met my BFs (27/M) family yet, and he hasn't met mine. Am I weird?", "post": "Throwaway because some know my regular user. Long story short I have been dating BF for only 5 months, known him 6, and we both had a discussion on how it's a big deal to meet each other's family, so it wasn't anything we both did right away. We wanted to focus on getting to know each other first. \n\nI'm not a very needy gf, he lives maybe like 12 miles away but has a wonky work schedule so I really only get to see him 1-2 a week, and I'm okay with that because hey...that's life and I really like him. My friends know this and think it's weird that he hasn't introduced me yet to his family, considering he uses the 'L' word and has talked about his future with me in a pretty serious manner. I know that his parent's get attached to his gfs so that's part of the reason he wanted to wait. I think or thought this was all reasonable but now my friends have me second guessing that it's fishy. Should I just tell them to mind their own business or do they have a point?", "summary": "Friends have me overthinking the fact that I haven't met his parents yet, need to know if this is as absurd as I think it is or if they have a point."}
{"id": "t3_175p66", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I (30) tell my husband (29) that I'm no longer attracted to him and I'm not satisfied sexually?", "post": "He's always been a big guy, and when we first started dating it wasn't really an issue. I was so in love and blind to all of his physical characteristics that his size didn't bother me. We've been married now for 6 years and the blinders have come off a bit. I still love him a great deal but I'm just not attracted to him anymore. He doesn't take care of himself. He doesn't shower enough, dresses like a hobo and eats like crap. I get kind of disgusted by him and I feel awful about it because I really do love the person he is on the inside. \n\nWhat's bothering me most is our sex life. I'm horny all the time, just not for him, and I'm starting to notice other men and that scares me. I want to be attracted to him and do all the kinky stuff I have in my head but I look at him and am so turned off. That, and his size makes sex very difficult so we've resorted to just using our hands and oral. It is so unsatisfying. \n\nHe is a *very* sensitive guy and I'm understanding of it and I don't want to hurt him but something has to change. He's noticed a difference in me and my lack of affection/desire but when he asks me about it I just blame it on something else. I have talked with him before about how sexy it'd be if he got in shape a little. I told him we could start eating right/working out together. I try to be as compassionate as possible but he either gets horribly offended and withdrawals from me or exercises for a day and then goes back to his old ways. \n\nWhat can I do? It's getting serious and I don't know how much longer I can be with a person that I find so repulsive. I know everyone will tell me to just be blunt and tell him how I feel, but it's not that easy. He's had a rough life that I won't get into (unless someone is interested of course) and i can't hurt his feelings like that. I just can't.", "summary": "my husband's weight/appearance/hygiene is turning me off and I'm finding myself looking at other men and i don't know how to talk to him about it effectively without hurting him."}
{"id": "t3_yogtm", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Anyone else either engaged for under a year or getting married young?", "post": "Hey guys! I'm 21 (as is my fiance),and we've been together for about two years. In total, our engagement will span about nine months, and we've got three months left (November 2012). We are choosing to do this because we love each other, we work well together, and we plan to be traveling a lot in the next few years (which you have more rights to each other as spouses than not, so we feel more comfortable). We are not particularly religious, it's not a shot gun wedding, and neither one of us is terminal. I rarely meet others who are either engaged for such a short time or who are young. Anyone else out there who's kind of like us? (Realistically, I appreciate all sharing!) Thanks guys! :)", "summary": "I'm getting married at 21 and am not super religious, pregnant, or dying. We seem to be unique in this. Anyone else out there?"}
{"id": "t3_2dlukz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M/ with my Ex [18 F] 2 years, Nothing eases the pain of missing her.", "post": "We've had a very rocky past 4 or 5 months, and have been very off and on. But about 3 weeks ago she flipped her car, and walked away. But it really made me reconsider everything about her. And now I understand how devastated I would be if I lost her. She broke up with me on the 5th and since then I have gone to the mall 3 times, seen 2 movies, gone out to do something everyday, worked about 40 hours, and hung out with friends. But nothing eases the pain. I feel depressed everywhere I go. Sometimes I have to go in the bathroom at work and regain control of myself. I can hardly fall asleep, and when I do I dream about her and it wakes me up.\n\nIn the past week i've been averaging about 6 hours of sleep a night, lost 8 or 9 pounds, and have had multiple breakdowns a day. \n\nIt doesn't seem like she's going to come back to me this time. Last night was the first time she had talked to me since she broke up with me, I told her how I felt and how I wanted to change and what I knew I needed to change and why it was actually going to change. I told her I loved her and she hesitated to say it back to me. She told me to call her if i needed her. But today she said she didn't care, and that she wants me to leave her alone.", "summary": "GF of 2 years dumped me, we've broken up like 6 times in the past 4 or 5 months. But this time it's really affecting me. I can't keep her off of my mind no matter what I do."}
{"id": "t3_4a4de2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (26F) best friend (25F) told her fianc\u00e9 (26M) personal and secretive stuff about me. I'm hurt and embarrassed.", "post": "My best friend, Sally, is engaged to Brian (names changed). Sally is a wonderful friend, and I'm friends with Brian, as well. The three of us hang out together a lot. \n\nI'll make this part short and to the point. I was recently told by my psychiatrist that I have PTSD. I am having flashbacks of childhood trauma and abuse- I'm not sure if it occurred, and it's very traumatic. Sally has been fantastic throughout all of this. She's listened to me, told me I'm not crazy, etc. \n\nLast night I found out that Sally has told Brian about what I've told her. I'm... Really hurt. This is very private and sensitive, and I didn't expect her to go and tell Brian. At the same time, I get telling your fianc\u00e9 everything, not keeping secrets, etc. But. This was my secret. My story. Even beyond my hurt, I'm embarrassed that she told him. This is very hard for me to process, and I've gone through many moments of feeling like \"am I crazy?\" \n\nDo I have a right to be upset? Should I confront Sally?", "summary": "I'm going through some traumatic stuff right now. My best friend told her fianc\u00e9. I found out last night. I'm really upset and don't know if I should confront her."}
{"id": "t3_3l42fh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15 M] Thinks Everyone Looks Better than me, and is better than me.", "post": "So...Where do I begin? \n\nI am 15 years old, 5'11, 160 pounds, and I really like a girl...(less relevant) but, I am too nervous to ask anything because I feel like every guy is better for her than I am and that compared to them, I'm nothing. I'm funny, and I know I look good (on many occasions called gorgeous) but...I just cant see it myself, It may be true..but I cant see it.\n\nI dont play a sport for my city, I dont play high in sport leauges, I dont do anything really phenomenal (other than..Caring and..I am an expert in Java) So, to me I can't see why she should take me over, a great sports player...And I am deathly afraid that if I do ask her out, she would much rather prefer another guy over me...I constantly think \"Oh, this guy looks way better than me..\" Even though people tell me that it is simply not true...I dont know why im like this and I need help with that...\n\nThanks Guys", "summary": "Think every guy is more skilled/looks better than me (even though thats not true) and that I will be no good vs another guy for a girl I like"}
{"id": "t3_iiptm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have any of you done a leadership course? If so, do you feel like it benefited you at all?", "post": "I graduated from uni in 2009 with a communcation design degree. Since then, I've been working at a building company doing admin work trying to find a graphic design job so I can quit. I'm still at my current job because a) I'm a slack bitch and haven't really applied for enough jobs/worked on my portfolio, etc and b) there's not many jobs for junior designers in my town.\n\nMy friend gave me a call a few nights ago telling me about how he went to a leadership course and it 'changed his life'. He said that he was more proactive after the course and said I should go along to the information session at his place. He also told me that the 3 day course costs about $600 which I technically have but don't really want to spend that much money. I'm still debating whether to even go to the information session.", "summary": "Graduated uni and still don't have a design job cause I'm slack/not many jobs. Friend is telling me to come to an info session for a leadership course and I'm hesitant about it."}
{"id": "t3_4shx9v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24M] with my girlfriend [23F] of 7 years have a good relationship, but I feel like I want to meet other people", "post": "So as I'm nearing my second quarter of a century, I'm starting to have a little \"quarter-life crisis\". \n\nI love my gf of 7 years (maybe not as passionate as in the beginning) and we mostly get together pretty good. Some minor stuff here and there, but nothing we can't get over. We were each other's first, lost our virginities to each other. But I can't shake the feeling that I'd like to know other girls, that I don't want her to be the only girl I've been with for the rest of my life, or maybe try being independent for a while.\n\nAt the same time, I don't want to lose her and I feel like I'd make a big mistake if I decide to leave her just for this (I know she won't accept me going solo for a year to try things out and then come back to her). And I also don't want to have the same question in another 7 years.\n\nHave you ever been in my situation? What did you do? How do you decide what to choose?", "summary": "want to meet other people, but relationship is not that bad as to leave it without remorse. can't decide what to do and the ambiguity is making me unhappy"}
{"id": "t3_32qrhf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 F] is scared meeting with online guy [23 M]", "post": "Hi everyone, I have two issues I need advice for: Thanks!\n\nFirst:\nI am a college student and I go to school in New York so there are TONS of high quality guys around. I've used Tinder and other social apps to meet guys online. The only thing I am worried about is that I don't know if a guy is truly single or not! I like dating guys older than me and I am afraid they will have a gf, or even married! I always tried to look them up on FB before talking to them, but most of them does not put their relationship. I will never be the third wheel in a relationship (it's who I am and I cannot forgive myself if I become one) and I hate dramas with other girls but I've encountered guys who have girlfriends who are chatting girls up online! If you have experience with dating online, can you give me some advice on how to avoid this?\n\nSecond:\nI've met this awesome guy and we have chatted nicely and everything for a couple of days. The chemistry is definitely quite strong with this one, except he is incredibly good looking and seems to be out of my standards (I found his FB). He haven't seen my picture yet, but I am really not the attractive type. He have all the qualities girls are looking for: good looks, good education and steady job out of college. I have a feeling he's been talking to other girls too, and I know for sure those girls are better looking than I am. I am really insecure about meeting up and have been avoiding it. I know all guys weight attractiveness very importantly...and I know I don't meet up to those standards. Our chemistry is awesome, but I don't think that is enough if he's not attracted to me....what should I do? Will the chemistry weight out the other factors...maybe?", "summary": "Need tips on how to avoid taken guys online; I am not attractive enough for the guy I am talking to online. Should I meet him?"}
{"id": "t3_3ojk3d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I[20F] buy a guy[25M] Ive been on and off with the past 3 months a expensive bday gift?", "post": "Me and this guy have been \"talking\" for a couple months. The last time we broke things off was because I felt like he was putting too much pressure on me.We did no contact for a lil over a month and just started seeing each other again last Thursday. \n\nFor his bday(It was Saturday) he wanted a pair of Jordans nikes.I agree to get them not knowing they cost $180. Sooo we get to the mall,I have about 50 bucks on me(broke college student) and then he shows me the shoes. I refuse to pay cause they dint seem worthy of that much money and I dint have that much money. I give him 40 and he pays the rest(he pulled out 1000's). He called me a liar and cheap and blah,blah,blah.I even put my ego aside and told him I just could not afford them and now he wont speak to me.\n\nIm not this mans gf and this happened 2 days after the no-contact ended. am I wrong for lying or is he for asking for something that expensive.", "summary": "guy I kinda like is mad i cant afford to buy him expensive shoes. am i wrong for saying i would buy them before i knew the price?"}
{"id": "t3_3ijznc", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Asking a barista out", "post": "I met this barista at a coffee shop I used to work at and she was just covering a shift (its not her location). We spoke for a bit on her breaks and I think we really hit it off. She asked to trade phones and creep each others pics. I also noticed she kept playing with her necklace while we talked. We talked about what we do with our free time, and our career goals and other misc topics. I foolishly didn't ask for her number. I went to her main store once but it was crazy busy, in fact its always really busy there is never any downtime (down-town mall location). Does anyone have any ideas how to get in and out asking her for a date/number? I don't want to put her on the spot in front of a large crowd of customers.", "summary": "Op thinks he hit if off with a barista, doesn't ask for number. Now wants to go to her store, but its really busy and doesn't know how to get it in a fast paced environment."}
{"id": "t3_173uge", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Anything I can do to improve?", "post": "So the title says it all. I am not new to running by any means. I want to get better at running and I know the general answer \"Run more\". I have ran a couple of 100 mile weeks but I'm down to about 50-60 mile week due to injury. I hope to be running ultra marathons in the next few years.\n\n I know this seems like a silly post but I've never really had anyone coaching me or anything so if there are any little things I can do to improve just a little I'd be happy to know about them!\n\nSome general information....\n\n**I am an 18 year old male** \n\n**I am a vegetarian** (I don't really think that matters but it'll cut out or add some dietary advice)\n\n**Injury I had: Hip pain** (Never really looked into it too much but the pain is gone now)", "summary": "I am not new to running and have had experience doing high mileage. What can I do (Besides run more) to improve? Any little thing helps!"}
{"id": "t3_3vex4x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "New bf [27M] not helpful with my [27F] family", "post": "We were out on a date which had to be cut short because my dad was not feeling  well. My mom asked that I come back home and send him to the hospital. We're barely two months in this relationship but my mom roughly knows that I have a bf. I asked if he could help... Help to support dad walking to the car and sending us to hospital. Kinda shocked when he said no. It seems more like nervous over meeting the family more than anything :( and maybe because we're still relatively new. He said he would meet my family soon but in better circumstances. However, if you could help, shouldn't you help? \nThere's also a few other instances where I felt he could help, but he doesn't seem to want to. Im not sure whether this is just cause we're new or should I be worried? He's perfect in every other way though.", "summary": "New bf. Family had an emergency. Expected him to help, but he did not want to because he was nervous. "}
{"id": "t3_2m77a9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [22/M] haven't had many relationships need advice on how to make and progress a healthy one", "post": "Ok so to start here's a brief synopsis of my past relationships: \n\nmy first official one was about a year ago she [20/F] (I was 21 at the time) was shy and lived in the next state over, and didn't have a car but worked with me to find good times to meet and I made an effort to visit her regularly. It was both our first real relationship so things didn't go very far in the physical department. when the fall semester started we were able to meet more frequently and I though things had been going well but suddenly it ended with her saying that she doesn't have romantic feelings for me after some introspection on her part. I reacted badly and too emotionally (crying and asking why, similar bs) mostly due that being my first real breakup. \n\nMy second relationship went better [21/f], we hung out a bit during summer (we lived closer and met more often and played some online games frequently) and got comfortable being close to one another but when college started back up I barely saw her. I tried every other week to set aside time for us but she consistently replied that she was too busy with work and school, I told her we could meet any time I wasn't in class but she rarely (once in 2 months) worked with me to find a good time. At this point I became rather dejected but kept it to myself and felt like she either didn't really like me and just wasn't telling me or I had done something wrong, but she said I hadn't done anything. So after a few weeks and only texting, with her changing the subject every time I tried to tell her how I was feeling and going out of my way to make time for us even if it was minimal and non romantic I broke up with her by basically saying that if she couldn't put any more effort into the relationship than she already was that we should just be friends. I was mad at her but I kept it to myself.\n\nI feel I should also say that I'm a high functioning autistic (NLD/NVLD) who has adapted well but still has a lot of trouble interpreting body language and nonverbal cues.", "summary": "I want a healthy relationship but am unsure how to best progress to that point, my previous relationships did not get to the point where we were emotionally or physically comfortable with one another."}
{"id": "t3_1nn4k2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] with my Boyfriend [20 M] of 1y, needs advice", "post": "We've been together for a year now and things have turned to shit. It's like he's not interested in me anymore. He used to hug me, or tell me he missed me. None of that now. We don't talk. We just sit there sometimes.\n\n---\n\nBut I don't want it to end and I've bought this to his attention by talking with him. He says that his mind is already made up but wants to try and fix things anyhow. We've had talk after talk, yet nothing changes, and all I want for him is a little more effort.\n\n---\n\nWhat I want to know is what can I do to make him interested again? Is there anything I could say that may help? I really don't want this to go down the drain, but if it does, how can I deal with this break-up?", "summary": "Boyfriend knowingly ignores me and wants to fix things but doesn't put effort in. Need to do/say something to fix things."}
{"id": "t3_1tj2lp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (22M) am having trouble deciding if i want to do about a girl (22F) i have been having relations with.", "post": "I (22M) have a crush on this girl (22F) in my University. I have asked her and she is interested in me also. We have had sex and things have been going on for 3 months.\n\nBut here is the twist, she is bipolar. She basically have these periods where she changes personality and won't talk to me and totally ignore me. These periods can come whenever and it's driving me crazy.\n\nThing is, I really like her. I can't get her out of my head and when she is \"normal\" we have a great time together and the sex i great. But I don't know if I can handle those \"periods\" anymore. They really hurt me emotionally. \n\nAny suggestions on what to do? Should i dump her or should I stick with it and \"ride the storms\"?\n\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "I like a girl, she likes me. We have been having sex but she ignore me sometimes and it hurt my feelings. Should i dump her?"}
{"id": "t3_53drje", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] boyfriend [19M] gets really upset over homework and I want to know how to handle it.", "post": "Carl and I have been dating for four months now. I love him a lot and he loves me a lot. I think he wants me to he around for a long time and I feel the same way. \n\nThe only issue with our relationship is school. He's taking a really tough class that just doesn't click with him. Normally you'd think this wouldn't be an issue, but it is. \n\nWhenever he's doing homework for this class, he gets really depressed and angry that he can't figure out the problems. Starts saying things like \"I hate myself\" and \"You should just kill me\". \n\nAs someone who has gone through depression, I see some symptoms in him and really wish he would see a counselor. I suggested it to him, but he said he could handle it himself and I'm not going to give him an ultimatum because I know that those aren't healthy. This is the only time he acts that way. He's almost always happier in person.\n\nI feel like he's upset because he feels inadequate because he can't do this class. He's not happy with his major. He's looking into other lines of work, but for now he's stuck in this class. \n\nI have no idea what to say to him when he gets like this. Humor doesn't work. Telling him that's it's going to be okay doesn't work. Telling him that everyone still loves him regardless doesn't work. He's tried tutoring, talking to the professor, anything. None of it has worked. I get sad whenever he talks this way, and being cheerful and upbeat about it takes energy. I've tried asking him what I should do in these situations, but he doesn't know. I'm a psych major and I don't know the first thing about the topic he's studying.\n\nI want to be as supportive as I can, but I'm at a loss here. \n\nAnybody know what I should say to him?", "summary": "Boyfriend gets really dark and upset because he can't do well in a class, I don't know how to support him."}
{"id": "t3_2qquhx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with my girlfriend [25F] 1yr, fucked up by talking to someone I shouldn't have. Need to rebuild trust", "post": "I've been dating my gf for a year. we've lived together since September.\n\nFrom mid-October to end of November, we were in a really rough patch where we were both working our asses off. She had family things happening at the same time, and it all came together in a perfect storm that took itself out on our relationship.\n\nUnfortunately, her stress was often vented onto me so I felt pretty inadequate. Our sex life suffered, I felt like I was turning into a really horrible boyfriend when I wasn't really, and I was feeling pushed away. Angry and in need of some kind of positive attention, I turned to a friend living overseas who I had had an on/off casual relationship with for 2 years, which ended 1 yr before I started my current relationship. I initiated and we sent messages back and forth here and there for approximately 3 weeks. They were long messages, sometimes lightly flirtatious, which is what I was looking for. After a week or so I knew I was wrong to have started it but I was enjoying catching up with a friend--which is what it had become.\n\nThe friend was home for Christmas and we both suggested meeting. I downgraded from a drink because i thought it would be inappropriate, and if we had actually decided to have lunch I would have asked my girlfriend's permission and finally spilled the beans on what I had done, kiboshing the entire thing if she said I should. \n\nInstead, she caught me red handed. We talked things through after i had a sleepless night on the couch and we are staying together, despite what she feels is emotional cheating. I love my girlfriend to the moon and back and this was a major mistake. Obviously rebuilding trust is a long process, but any advice on small acts or suggestions for things I need to keep in mind would be welcome.", "summary": "rekindled conversation with an ex out of anger and resentment; was caught in the lie and need to save my relationship. Advice needed but please hold the vitriol, I feel worse enough as it is. "}
{"id": "t3_2xs1jt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] Can't commit to anything serious.", "post": "I had a relationship when i was around 17 yr old. She was my first real love and i was so in love. When we just decided to get serious and be an official couple, it took her two weeks to dump me. \n\nIt made me extremely sad and i had problem sleeping and just functioning overall. This is probably kinda common for people after breakups, but i took it really hard. Worst part was i had to spend last year in high school together because we went to same class.  \n\nThis was three years ago and since then i have been dating girls. \nIt got serious with two of the girls. They were both perfect and everything was working fine between us. But with both girls it just changed overnight, without any reason, and i just felt i needed to end it before it went any longer. I couldn't commit, and i think it's partly because i'm terrified to get heartbroken again.\n\nHave anybody else been in this situation or have any good advice?\nJust ended it today with girl number two and i feel like shit.", "summary": "Got dumped by my first love three years ago and since then I cant commit to any relationships because i'm afraid to get heartbroken again."}
{"id": "t3_500g0r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[28/M] Being single is starting to drive me crazy. Looking for advice?", "post": "This whole not being in a relationship thing isn't really working out for me too well, especially with my mix of social anxiety. I have been single for over a year and a half now. I just really miss the day to day part of being in a relationship. Just like random trips to the grocery store or the mall together. Or waking up next to someone every morning. There are things I want to go out and do, but I avoid some of them because I just know they would be more fun if I had someone to do them with. So I just end up staying at home by myself a lot of the time instead of going out. Unfortunately for me, the prospects of me finding a girl to date and hopefully turn into a relationship are not very good right now and I don't really see them improving in the near future. Just looking for some suggestions or advice to help me get out of this downward spiral.", "summary": "I've been single for a year and a half, starting to isolate myself more and more. Don't see any dating prospects in the near future. Not sure what to do. Suggestions? Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_l8xye", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Am I in the wrong here?", "post": "Alright, so I've been dating this girl for a couple weeks and she comes to me with a problem. Her ex somehow got her number (which he probably already had seeing as they dated for 3 years) and started texting her and calling her a bitch because he heard she was talking about him behind his back to his friends. \n\nSo I ask if she did and she replies \"Lol yeah. I called him a fatty with chink eyes because I know it pisses him off.\" And now because I told her it wasn't cool just to randomly go off and say something like that, she's mad at me. Am I in the wrong or what?", "summary": "Girlfriend talked shit about ex behind his back, ex found out and got mad, girlfriend mad at me for telling her to stop talking shit about ex for no reason."}
{"id": "t3_2nwma9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (18f) hooked up with my long distance ex bf (18m), and i'm not sure where to go from here...", "post": "Last weekend, my ex was in town for a party i was at as well. I spent the whole night helping him because he drank too much, and he ended up passing out at my house. \nWe hooked up in the morning, completely sober, and acting like we were dating again. \nWe talked yesterday, but just trivial conversation. I know he's avoiding talking to me because we didn't speak for so long and this is so sudden. I know it brought up old feelings for me, but i'm not sure about him. The way he acted, i figured it was a possibility and that's why he is so awkward.\nHe's a naturally awkward person though, i was thinking, should i wait for exams to be finished and to see him in person to bring it up and see where it goes? There will be a party next month we will both be at.\nor should i just leave it to him to bring up? i know he avoids \"feelings\" discussions, so idk what to do. I really do want to continue things with him, but honestly this is driving me insane.", "summary": "ex bf and i hooked up and he's long distance. not sure how to bring it up again with him, but i want to continue things."}
{"id": "t3_2gp0hz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (30sF) husband (30sM)'s co-worker (30s?F) is claiming they had an affair. I don't think they did.", "post": "So I got a weird email today from \"Amy\" my husband's co-worker.  In this email, she's claiming that she's been having an affair for over a year with my husband.  She even kindly provided the dates that they were supposedly together - here's the catch, on several of these dates we were out of town.  And not just out of town but a few hundred miles away visiting his family.  Also, I just don't think my husband is the kind to cheat - we have a pretty decent marriage.  It's not perfect but I think I'd know if something was going on for a year.\n\nHe's mentioned Amy a few times before but nothing beyond normal chit chat.  I never met her and I don't even know how she got my email.  I'm debating whether or not to show him the email when he comes home or if I should just contact the company's HR department or their boss.  Or tell him and then contact them.  There was some pretty explicit stuff in the email and I'm uncomfortable just getting it from her, even if I think it's probably a bunch of lies.\n\nAny advice on how to deal with this?", "summary": "Husband's co-worker emailed me a dirty account of an affair she says she had with him the past year, but the dates don't match up.  Trying to decide how to handle this."}
{"id": "t3_cg4yb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What are your worst/best breakup stories?", "post": "Story time for Reddit! Give me your worst (or best) break-up stories!\n\nWorst: One girl and I had been together for a while and had a rocky relationship with ups and downs. I wanted to marry her, but she thought she might still be in love with an old flame that was leaving for the Navy in a few months for a six year leave. She had a hard time choosing, but I figured I'd make the choice easy for her. Told her \"we need to talk when you get home,\" so she decided to get totally hammered. When she got home, she was slamming doors and yelling at her roommate. When I finally said the words, she spent the next 20 minutes chewing me out in her drunken, slurred speech and slammed the door in my face.\n\nThe next day she called me saying she couldn't remember what happened the previous night, so I had to do it all over again.\n\nBest: Wasn't working out. Got break-up sex, which turned into friends with benefits. Woot", "summary": "WORST: She was drunk, cussed me out, and had to do it again the next day. BEST: Break-up sex to friends w/ benefits"}
{"id": "t3_49f2tt", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Choosing between ~120 dollars from \"student aid\" or a profitable job (swe)", "post": "So the situation is as follows:\n\nI am an 18 year old living in Sweden. I am in my last year of high school level studies and I am graduating in June. I work as a private tutor 2 times a week, making me about 150% more after taxes than the government aid given to students here. Due to a change of teachers, my school schedule now overlaps with my most profitable client, with one lesson. \n\nThe lesson is a one hour session in Religious studies, with one of the worst teachers I have ever had. Basically, all the information we get is from the book and is nothing more than what I was taught in elementary school. So I could easily \"catch up\" from that lesson myself at home. \n\nIf I would choose to skip the lesson for work, I would loose my students aid. Here, I can get ~120 dollars every month, if my attendance is high enough and I have legitimate reasons for being absent. Illness is approved absence, working is not. \n\nMy client has already a really tight schedule themselves and cannot move their weekly session with me. Most likely, my school will not allow me to skip one lesson a week, no matter what. I will most likely have to choose between my student aid or my client.\n\nMy parents are strongly against the idea of me intentionally missing out on my student aid. They think that it will encourage me to skip even more classes and that it is extremely immoral to not prioritize school when \"high school is my full time job\". I do not have their support if I choose to work. I still live at home and will probably do so for another 4-5 years because of university studies. My relationship with my parents is already frosty and I got the job from the beginning in an attempt to be a little more independent. The money in question is purely my own pocket money so nobody is relying on it to put food on the table.\n\nI really do not know what to do at this point. Any proper adult who can talk me in to what the right decision is?", "summary": "I have to choose between ~120 dollars in government supported \"student aid\" or roughly the same amount, after taxes, at an extra job as a private tutor. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_bpvcz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Am I being too picky? Internet dating question...", "post": "I (25/f) recently joined an internet dating site, because the college town I live in is very cliquey and it's pretty hard to meet new people outside of my social circle. I'll come right out and say that I'm attractive and in good shape, so I got quite a few responses within the first few days of being on the site. I briefly chatted/emailed with a few guys with the intention to meet up soon, as I didn't join to become someone's online pen pal. In their photos, all of the guys seemed relatively attractive, but when I met up with them in person, not so much. Out of the 3 I've met up with so far, maybe one of them I could see myself being physically attracted to if I get to know him better. The other 2 were so nice, but there's no physical attraction on my end. There's nothing wrong with them, per se, they just look different (and not as good) in real life than they did in their pictures. A little softer and rounder, too. They're all definitely attracted to me. I've always thought of physical attraction as a main motivator for a romantic relationship, but these experiences have left me feeling very superficial and weird.\n\nI had been in a long term relationship for 3 years until last fall, and I never really \"dated\" before that, so I don't know how to tell these guys I'm not interested in a nice way. I don't really even want to be friends with them. They're calling and texting and I'm trying to be non-chalant about it but I don't want to string them along. Am I being way too superficial? Should I give these guys a chance even though I'm really not attracted to them? I don't want to lead them on if they're destined to the friend-zone. Give up on internet dating already?", "summary": "Trying online dating but the guys I meet are way more attracted to me than I am to them. Advice on how to let them down easy? Or, how to be less superficial?"}
{"id": "t3_3rzbu1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [21 M] wrong to feel upset with my girlfriend [21 F] of 7 months when she has lunch with a friend during the time I really needed to see her?", "post": "Today I had a really shitty day. Not devastating, just run of the mill awful day. My girlfriend and I had planned lunch during the 1.5 hour break I had between 6 hour shifts at work. I walked 30 minutes in the rain to the restaurant, and find out she brought along one of her friends she knows I don't get along with. The wait at the restaurant is 30 minutes, and I tell her I don't have time to wait that long, but she decides to stay with her friend and eat there. I walk home to eat.\n\nI was really looking forward to that lunch to help me through a really stressful day, and she knew I was stressed and frustrated with work. I feel like she shouldn't have asked her friend to come to lunch. On the other hand, I feel selfish for wanting to keep her from seeing her friend today, because they don't hang out all that often.Am I being selfish and needy, or do I have a decent reason for being kind of upset with her?", "summary": "Girlfriend wanted to spend time with a friend she doesn't see often during the time I really wanted to spend time with her and offload from work."}
{"id": "t3_hj4ax", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Refinancing possible?", "post": "I have pretty bad credit that I have slowly been repairing.\n\nA year and a half ago my old car died and I need to get a new car... like an idiot I decided to see if I can buy new instead of used.\n\nBecause of my bad credit I got a terrible APR on the thing and made the deal anyway... because I had it in my head that I wanted a new car. So for 60 months I'm paying $574 per month on this car - I can afford it, but it's at the point where with everything I make enough to pay my bills and not really a lot of room to put much money at all away in savings.\n\nAs of right now I have 42 payments left on the car. I added everything up and it basically means so far I have been paying for the interest on this car loan and still owe more than what the car was even worth new. The car is a 2009 Kia Sportage that I bought for around $22,000 with an APR that was around 20%.\n\nI'd like to get to the point where I can easily pay $250-300 per month if possible.\n\nWhat should I do? Can I refinance it successfully? Should I look into trading off the car and trying to get a used one? If I refinance is there any recommendations on how to do that process?", "summary": "bought a car that cost me 22k, after a year and a half I still owe over 24k if I make the normal monthly payments - is there anything I can do?"}
{"id": "t3_1opii2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend trouble (20F) (24M)", "post": "Boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months now. He has suffered from depression for a few years now and when I first met him he was suffering from a (one-off according to doctors) psychotic break that consisted of grandiose delusions. He went to a hospital and stayed til he was better (2 weeks). We have a quiet, boring relationship, hardly any sex due to his low sex drive, but thats okay. I still adore him.\n\nI give alot more than he gives in the relationship but I consider it worth it because I love him alot. He was also horrible at communication during our relationships. Not many calls or texts but we never went over a week without speaking.\n\n2 weeks ago, during (and what still is) a very stressful time for me (end of uni, court cases, birthday, moving out of home) he stopped talking to me. After a week I called his parents whom I was in contact with due to his mental illnesses, and was told he flew to Sydney with his father. He sent me 1 text joking he might get me a present. According to his parents, he got back 2 days later. I didnt hear from him again for another week. I figured this was his cowardly way of breaking up with me. \n\nI admit I may have gone a little text crazy but after deciding he has dumped me, I sent one last \"I'm sorry, I wont text or call again\" text. 2 days later he messaged me saying \":'( I'm so sorry. I know I'm horrible, I can't stop crying\", I left it a few hours, and texted back that it didnt really clarify anything for me as to whether we are still together.\n\nHe still hasnt messaged me yet and I'm unsure what to do or what he is meaning. Is he crying and feeling bad because he loves me or because hes dumping me? Regardless, I just would like to know.\nI'm looking for some perspective on his actions or what actions I should take.", "summary": "my boyfriend hasnt spoken to me in 2 weeks other than \":'( i'm so sorry, i know i'm horrible, i cant stop crying\". is he dumping me or?"}
{"id": "t3_4heegv", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "What could explain my difficulties with women??", "post": "23 m\n\nI'm not socially awkward, but I am fairly introverted. It's not that I don't like to talk, I just don't usually talk unless I have something to say. That aside, women never talk to me first nor can they keep a conversation going. Even in group discussions in class, usually only the guys will discuss the topic with me. \n\nHere's the bizarre thing, I have a TON of gay friends that hit on me all the time. Why are the men so forward and confident, but women are all shy or uncomfortable / anxious around me? Tbh, I have the same amount of close gay friends as I have close straight guy friends. And obviously that ratio is pretty lopsided. And literally only women that I'm not very attracted to will try to be friends with me and they're always way cooler than most above average looking women(from my perspective). It's like there's some kind of tension there when I'm around attractive women. I don't know if it's what I say, or if I put off bad vibes, but it's usually only around attractive women. It's like even if I'm actually trying to hold a conversation, they don't contribute.\n\nMy luck has been bad enough to where I had sexual relations one time with my only best female friend and she has avoided hanging out with me ever since. I'm not sure what the problem was because we were pretty close. She didn't even give anything a chance, but I suspect this had to do with her relatively recent breakup.\n\nEvery women I've been with or been \"talking\" has said I'm too attractive for them. Idk if that's even related, but it's like they think they aren't good enough for me when I try to become more than friends. Sometimes I think how much easier it'd be if I was gay lol. Gay guys always find me one way or another, it happens all the time ha.\n\nAlso, my field of study has an inherent lack of women. That probably has a lot to do with the lack of women in my life in general. \n\nSo, what could the problem be??", "summary": "I have a lot better luck with gay guys befriending me and talking to me than the same with women. Why??"}
{"id": "t3_2xds5z", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by browsing reddit while laying in bed with my girlfriend", "post": "So this literally just happened. My girlfriend had a long day yesterday and has been catching up on sleep. I'm up, but didn't want to get out of bed and wake her up. She's cuddling on my chest and sleeping away while I'm just silently mourning the loss of Leonard Nimoy.\n\nAnyways, I've got one arm under her head while the other is holding my phone. So my phone is right next to her ear.\n\nI'm scrolling through and I see something that says \"Japanese Cooking in 3 seconds.\" Seems interesting enough! I open it up expecting a gif. Did I mention that my phone, although on silent, had the media volume turned ALL THE WAY UP?\n\nSo this video starts playing, and right when I realize it's a video, this fucking weird ass music starts blasting out of my phone and into my girlfriend's ear.\n\nFUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. No matter how much I tapped the screen the volume button wouldn't come up. So my girlfriend wakes up to this weird, loud Japanese music fucking pissed. \n\nNo amount of sorries could stop the glare she gave me.\n\nAnd now I'm sitting here typing this for you with no snuggles to be had.", "summary": "Tried to snuggle and browse reddit while girlfriend was sleeping, freaky Japanese music, no more snuggling for me this morning."}
{"id": "t3_1y77nu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How many dates exactly before you need to call someone to tell them you're not interested in seeing them anymore?", "post": "That's it really. Went on 3 dates with a girl. Was really 2 too many but she was very eager to see me again, came to my part of town from across the city for the 2nd and 3rd dates, all happened over the course of a month. \n\nShe was persistently texting me (many many texts per day), and she wanted to see me for another date. I finally texted her that I didn't think we should see each other romantically anymore. \n\nShe lost it. Probably 20 - 25 very angry texts, said I should have called her. Said I wasn't \"man enough\" to do it. Meanwhile I was at work and busy, not that I thought this warranted a call anyway. I've dated girls for 2/3 months who \"ended it\" over text, and never thought it was a big deal.", "summary": "Went on 3 dates with girl. Told her over text I didn't want to see her romantically anymore. Girl loses it."}
{"id": "t3_wnobc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "He (24/M) paid for me (22/F) to fly across the country to visit him, but now he's very emotionally distant.", "post": "Background: We've been in an on/off relationship since he first broke up with me early this year. He suggested that we try a LDR the day before he moved across the country. Now it's a month later, and I flew to this town to visit him (he paid for the tickets 2 weeks ago).\n\nProblem: I'm leaving tomorrow afternoon, but he's still preoccupied with work. He's also emotionally distant (no physical contact at all, not even sitting closely together) and we hardly talk to each other. The only time I feel close to him is when we have sex, because he'll initiate by being more romantic. He also introduced me as his \"friend\".\n\nI need to maintain a friendly relationship with him for other reasons, but I feel so lonely right now. I know we're not going to last. What should I do for the rest of the trip to maintain my sanity?", "summary": "I visited the guy I'm seeing for the weekend, but a break up is imminent. What should I do while I'm still in town?"}
{"id": "t3_2duhxh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by leaving a conference call on while I went to pick up my wife. (NSFW)", "post": "Around 4 months ago I put in for PTO time so I could take my wife and son on vacation. After making all my arrangements my boss came up and asked if I could reschedule my vacation because there was a very important meeting the week I scheduled my vacation. I told him I couldn't really reschedule anything and finally we settled with me being on a webcam/conference call type deal for the meeting. \n\nI agreed and went on vacation, well come time for the meeting I set up my laptop in the hotel room. The meeting was fairly early in the morning so I woke up and I dropped my wife off at some tourist trap she wanted to see. The place she was going wasn't for kids so my son stayed and slept. I came back to the hotel and the meeting started. The meeting went well for the most part.\n\n1 hour into the meeting my wife called and needed picked up. I told my boss I had to go get my wife id be back in 20 minutes. So I left to go get my wife, I left my son in the hotel and told him id be back in 20 minutes. I screen locked the laptop, I didn't know they could still see and hear everything with the laptop locked but they could. Long story short after I left my 13 year old son decided it would be a good time to jerk off, so he did. In front of my boss and about 20+ other employees on the conference call. They seemed to be OK about the whole situation and I wasn't fired. Still however the most embarrassing thing ever.", "summary": "My kid masturbated in front of my bosses and some other employees.                 "}
{"id": "t3_2pxodh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by yelling something I shouldn't have", "post": "So as /r/TIFU tradition dictates, this event happened a few months ago. I'm on my school's cross country team and we're at this meet which generally has a pretty large turnout (it's a yearly event). One of the other teams has a uniform which is characterized with a ton of K's covering a black and white checkerboard pattern (the team name begins with a K). So, with my friends and I being the high schoolers we are, we decide to nickname this team the KKK. The meet has gone on for a couple hours now and we're still waiting for our race to start. So to pass the time we're cheering our teammates on. In the very final 100m of the race, one of our team members (who is black) is about to be passed by none other than a member of \"team K.\" In a moment of excitement I yelled \"Come on [X], don't let the KKK beat you!\" I immediately realized what I had said and my coach gave me a stern talking to and said if anything else happened there would be an open spot on the team.", "summary": "tried to cheer on a teammate about to get passed at the end of a cross country race, ended up being accidentally racist"}
{"id": "t3_1mhlil", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it possible that my brain cannot learn grammar?", "post": "All my life I have struggled with grammar and was wondering whether it is possible to be gramar-disability or something similar.\n\nI speak four languages because we moved a lot when I was a kid. I picked all of them up by ear. However, it was very hard for me to pick up a language in a classroom setting (three years of French and I can barely string together a sentence without errors). I also bend and break grammatical rules in all the languages I speak, and don't have much of an ear for correct and proper sentence structure. I don't speak any of language perfectly.\n\nI ended up studying Indology, a subject that I love. Though the literature, philosophy etc is very easy for me, grammar is my huge stumbling block. I have a feeling that I have been learning the same basic grammar for years and still haven't got the hang of it. I keep on messing up even the very basics. (The language I study is a dead one, so I can't learn it by interacting with locals). Without the grammar I am unable to read texts independently, and this basically rules out any future job in the field.\n\nSo I was wondering whether it is possible that my brain is lacking something? Is it possible to be gramatically-challenged? (I am also mathematically challenged and even have problems with basic division). Anyone else have the same problem? Or am I just doing something wrong? Is there a better and more efficient way to learn grammar?", "summary": "I struggle with learning and understanding grammar, am I doing it wrong or should I just accept that this is something my brain is bad at?"}
{"id": "t3_1nhb1m", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [F21] have a crush on my superior at work [M25]. Halp.", "post": "So I recently started interning at a new place and really hit it off with the guy who is one of my two direct supervisors. By \"hit it off\" I mean that when we're not busy, we're usually talking on gchat, he says things like \"You're the best intern ever\" and \"I don't know how I got so lucky to have you as my intern,\" we went out for drinks with a couple other coworkers today and he bought my beer, and he really seems to like my ideas and work. When I was walking into our office building today he ran up behind me and sort of poked me to scare me. That sort of thing. Nothing super flirtatious, but we're more like pals than super professional, stiff coworkers. And I know he's single, too, so there's that.\n\nThe thing is, this is a really small office and I want to parlay this internship potentially into a real job. Socializing after hours isn't frowned upon at all (my other supervisor and I just went to a concert a couple weeks ago, but we were friends before I got this job), but I have a feeling dating would be. I know for sure that a full-time employee dating an intern would be. Basically, I have no idea what to do. I click with this guy pretty well (and we're of a similar level of attractiveness, which is cool - I'm almost always crushed out on guys who are way out of my league), but I also *really* like this job. Should I just wait until December and see what happens? But what if the spark goes away before then? I have no idea what I'm even doing but I know all my options are going to be disappointing in one way or another.", "summary": "I like my coworker, but dating him openly would be bad and also I don't even know if he's interested in me WTF DO I DO. Question mark."}
{"id": "t3_1c071i", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "How can my boyfriend bond with my skittish dog?", "post": "I have 2 dogs. One loves everyone (after he growls and barks at you) and the other one trusts NO ONE but me. I got them both from the SPCA. The skittish dog is a Shiba Inu/Italian Greyhound mix and he's always been afraid of pretty much everything. \n        When I brought him home he immediately hid underneath my bed but I won his trust with some bread crusts and after that he's been my shadow. This dog follows me EVERYWHERE (besides the bathroom, he hates baths). If I go upstairs, he goes upstairs. If I sit on the couch, he sits on the couch. \n    Problem is, I've been dating my boyfriend for soon to be 3 years and have lived with him since November. My other dog loves him but my boy Haku doesn't really trust him or anyone. He won't sit in his lap or next to him and won't run or play with him. He only wants to be with me. I know it's gotta be frustrating for my boyfriend because he does try to bond with Haku but Haku doesn't really let him. Haku has become less afraid of him but still won't do much with him. I'm just wondering if there are any good ways for them to bond more. When we go for a walk, he walks Haku. He gives him treats and everything. But more than that, Haku won't have it. If he tries to run with Haku with him leashed, Haku will whine and look back and be miserable. \n    Is there any way to get my dog to want to be with my boyfriend more than he already does? Or is he just a one person dog and that won't ever change?", "summary": "My dog is like a shadow to me and wants to do everything with me. Doesn't trust or love anyone but me. Wondering ways my boyfriend can bond with my dog?"}
{"id": "t3_3h8xe8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [30 M] Ex[25 F] and I have been broken up for 3.5 years with next to no contact, shes now coming to visit me - Advice/Help Please", "post": "Me and my ex have been broken up now for about 3.5 years. About 3 months ago she re-established contact and things were going great, but she started getting mad at me when I couldn't talk because I was at work or busy with other things, so I cut contact again.\n\nIn the last week she has left her fiance, and texts or calls me regularly; at present I am just ignoring them. But now she left me a message saying she is planning a trip to come visit me. We live across the country from each other.\n\nI know I still love her, and that I probably always will, but I just don't know what to do in this situation. I would love to see her, but I think that whatever happens it will end up hurting one or both of us. I can not see a future where we can be together, no matter how much I want that.\n\nDo I re-establish contact to tell her don't come? What if she still comes? Do I embrace what shes doing? I am at a complete loss.\n\nAny help or suggestions are appreciated", "summary": "That I love my Ex and dont know how to deal with her anymore. After extended non contact it seems that we are drawn together, but I dont know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4pdlhi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "my [22F] sister [24F] is dating someone who makes me uncomfortable, and he [40somethingM] has essentially moved into our house.", "post": "My sister and I both live at home. I just graduated college and I move out again to a different city in August. Hopefully this move will be forever. \n\nMy sister's boyfriend is twenty years older than her. He does not have a home (he bounces around between his parents, his sister, and our house). He has been divorced twice, and has three children between the two marriages (whom he has very little custody of -- it's an every other weekend situation). He's a chain smoker. I find him very rude and abrasive and I find that he is disrespectful to his children. I just have a \"vibe\" about him that says \"creepy.\" If I was about to pass this guy on a sidewalk, I'd cross the street. \n\nI don't really care that my sister is dating someone creepy. We are not close, we are not friends. If she sees something in this guy, fine. Good for her. \n\nMy problem is that since he does not live anywhere, he essentially lives here. I come home from work wanting to relax and there he is, reeking of cigarettes and eating the food I bought for my dinner. He makes me feel uneasy. I try to leave the house when he is here, but recently that has started to be all the time. My sister has asked me if I care if he stays over -- I have said yes, that it makes me uncomfortable. In response she just gets accusatory and yells at me for not liking him. I just don't know how to survive these few months living with this guy.", "summary": "My sister's boyfriend is old, smelly, creepy, and technically homeless, and has recently moved into our house. How do I bare with my sister's deadbeat boyfriend until I move out?"}
{"id": "t3_e658o", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Burned out - How can I keep myself motivated?", "post": "So, I started this semester with what I thought was just a normal class load, but it turned out to be several times worse than any of the previous semesters by far.  As a result, I've worked my tail off for the first 2/3 of the semester, staying up super late every night as a result (on the order of 3-4 am every morning).  There was exactly one day off this semester, during which I, you guessed it, worked some more.\n\nNow, with three weeks to go, I'm burned out to the point where it's all I can do to even focus in my classes and get my work done.  I know I need to get things done earlier/faster, but I am forced to use [Leechblock] to forcibly prevent myself from just wasting time online.  \n\nAnd yet, I still find ways to get around doing my work until it's very late at night.  How can I motivate myself to get out of these doldrums and finish these next three weeks strong?", "summary": "I worked my ass off for most of this semester, and now I don't feel like doing anything productive.  How can I motivate myself to do better?"}
{"id": "t3_264t0r", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My [21/m] girlfriend[22/f]'s dad has a crucial operation next month. Doctors say it's risky. How can I approach her?", "post": "*My problem is not as dramatic as other redditors and I understand if you want to help and give advice to them first. However, I would be very thankful if you would take the time to realise my situation.\nSorry for my spelling and grammar errors, English is my third language*\n\n*Background info* :\nI'm in a long distance relationship with my SO for about 8 months now. I live in the Netherlands, she in Australia. Given the fact I am a typical student, I only have words in my arsenal. \n\nI've visited her and her parents in April and I must say that I've never met such a wonderful caring family as hers. I'm not 100% of the details, but I beleve the dad has a kidney transplant with the mother as donor, leaving my SO as a carer. \n\nProblem with this surgery is there could be several outcomes. They could open him up, say ,,no we can't do it'' and he can be on dialysis everyday for the rest of his life. They could do the transplant and the body could not accept the new kidney anyway, it could work or he could lose his legs or he could die. \n\n*Current situation:*\nWe spoke today and she refused to be positive. She said that she is trying to be positive but it's not as positive as it sounds. She is very scared and has trouble sleeping, and messages me at night because of that. She tries to find comfort through talking but I do know not what to say and I end up talking about paying back the money I owed her.. stupid >.< \n\nI've send her some photos i've found at /r/babyelephantgifs (bless this subreddit) to cheer her up, but that is all. \n\n*my question:*\n**How can I convince her that whatever happens, she has to stay positive?", "summary": "SO refuses to stay positive before the kidney transplant of her dad, it eats me up not being able to comfort her at night."}
{"id": "t3_1reivt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[22m] dating [19f] not sure if I should be feeling more than I am?", "post": "We're dating.. not calling it BF or GF.. although that's what it basically is after about two months now. Sometimes I'm really into her and other times I'm less. She is the first girl I've actually \"dated\" (in that we see/talk to each other almost daily / are exclusive) and she REALLY likes me. I just feel like I should be feeling more affection than I do? Is this something that will occur later on as we see each other more?\n\nI never expected this to be a super serious relationship with marriage potential or anything in the first place, but I feel like I should be feeling more affection towards her than I am.\n\nAnother issue is that this girl is a real sweetheart and is super nice happy person. Her family already knows about me and all of her friends etc. If I were to end this in the coming weeks or months I would feel like it would really hurt her -- which is not something I want. *IF* I decide it should end is there a way to break it off in a non depressing way and maintain her as a good friend?", "summary": "How affectionate should I feel two months into dating (with sex being involved for the last few weeks)? Is there an easy way to end the dating if need be while not hurting her and maintaining our friendship?"}
{"id": "t3_1ycqzh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my [22 F] short term relationship broke up and I'm having trouble.", "post": "So I began dating a girl right before Christmas. Things were absolutely perfect for about 6 weeks.  By far the best relationship I have ever been involved in in my life.  About two weeks ago I made some mistakes of overreacting to small things.  She started to pull away and I just kept making it worse.  A week ago we really talked things out and everything seemed to be better again.  Then Saturday night I overreacted over nothing again and Sunday morning she broke it off with me.  I sent her a really sincere and honest text Monday about how it was my fault and I was insecure.  \n\nI haven't spoke to her since but I realize what I lost and how it was my fault.  I was planning on texting her in two week just to see how she is and not make anything of it because I am actually leaving the country for a week.  \n\nShe said when we broke up she was upset that we lost what was so good at the beginning. I really want to show her I'm not that guy and I am really as laid back as she is. Is this a good idea or am I just grasping at straws?", "summary": "! Had a great girl.  Messed it up.  Want to give her space and see if we can try again.  Should I do this or not?"}
{"id": "t3_1zbov6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [26 F] thinking about contacting an old friend [25 F] that moved overseas but am unsure if it's a good idea.", "post": "I [F25] recently have been thinking about getting in contact with an old friend [also F25] that moved overseas back in 2010. \n\nWe were really close throughout middle school, high school and afterward (been friends nearly 10 years) but had a bit of a falling out when she made plans to move countries to be with her BF at the time. \n\nWe basically had a fight about her going. I wanted to rent a place together, I told her about it plenty of times and even tried helping her find work to pay for her half. \n\nOne day she told me that she suddenly had plans to go be with some guy on the internet that lived overseas, she was leaving the following month. I told her it was a bad idea and she should just stay and get a place with me like we talked about before. She then told me I was a bad friend for trying to keep her from pursuing her BF. We stopped talking, she dropped all contact with me and that was it. \n\nTime went on; I went through my old high school things at my parent's place and got a bit emotional looking at old photos of the two of us with our other friends. \n\nOne thing led to another and I tracked her down on facebook. From the look of it she still lives overseas and is now married. \n\nI'm at a cross roads now about contacting her. I want to apologise and continue our friendship but I think it's a little too late now. I feel like an ass now for implying she was wasting her time going there in the first place.", "summary": "Friend moved overseas to be with bf, told her she was wrong to do so, dropped contact with me, time skip to now, look through old photos of us, find her facebook, not sure to contact or not?"}
{"id": "t3_4zjbg0", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I[25F] invite my friend [24F] to a party without inviting her man friend [26M]", "post": "I genuinely enjoy being around my friend and I want to invite her to a party I will be having. However, I really hate her pseudo-boyfriend and do not want him there. The first time I met him she brought him to a previous party I had and he was completely awful - I mean he arrived intoxicated, was rude to my boyfriend, was rude to me, and I overheard him making comments about how lame we were. After we invited him into our home and have him free food and alcohol! He was so obnoxious that he literally broke up the party...everyone there expressed distaste with his demeanor and people were actually leaving because they didn't want to be around him.\n\nSome options:\n\nDon't invite her at all: difficult because she lives with another friend of ours who I do plan to invite and I won't be able to invite one without the other. I can not invite either but I am sure they will hear about it through the grapevine or someone will post something on social media, and I don't want to have to lie to them because I like them.\n\nTell her that this guy sucks: we are co workers and I don't want to make that awkward. Also, all of her other friends have already told him he sucks and she has been hard headed about it.\n\nI realize this sounds petty but I really don't want to spend any time around this Martin Shkreli wannabe if I don't have to.", "summary": "How do I invite someone to a party without inviting their significant other, and if there is no tactful way, how can I handle having an obnoxious jerk in my home, killing my party vibe"}
{"id": "t3_2d14cm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my gf [21 F] of 1.5 years, pulled me aside and implied breakup over me and her busy schedule.", "post": "Okay this may be a bit complicated but here it goes.\n\nComing home from a date yesterday, my gf told me that \"this might not be the right time for us. I'm so busy and I feel like I can never please you. I feel like you always blame me for not spending a lot of time with you.\" When I asked her if she was breaking up with me she said \"I never said that. But we need to figure something out.\" \n\nShe is a very busy girl and I totally support her in all the great things she does. And I've told her this many times. I don't mind being put on a backburner sometimes because that gives me some freedom to chill out with my friends. But me saying that I haven't blamed her for anything would be biased, however I don't think I really have. I think she blames herself. On a side note I have noticed she has become increasingly distant but she says that she still loves me. I haven't contacted her since I dropped her off at her place. I really don't want to break up with this girl. Any help or advice on how I should continue would be great. Ugh.\n\nThank you", "summary": "Girlfriend is implying breakup over her schedule, and says we need to figure something out. How to continue? What to say? What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2zm1b5", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being observant on a friend's porch", "post": "So winter has seemingly been coming to an end where I live and yesterday was probably the nicest day of the year so far.  It was one of my friend's birthdays so we gathered at his house and cracked a few beers.  All was going well so we decided to move the small celebration to the front porch considering the refreshing warm weather.\n\nThe streets were fairly bustling in the college neighborhood and people in general just seemed grateful to be experiencing spring.  Cars were coming and going, women were rollerblading and men were long boarding.  What an enjoyable day so far!\n\nIt was beginning to get dark out but the temperature was still favorable.  Across the street and in between 2 cars was a curb sewer, kind of like [this] .  I had been looking in that direction for whatever reason when I witnessed the biggest raccoon I have ever seen crawl out of the sewer.  I initially thought it was an average-sized house dog.  It was HUGE compared to any other raccoon I had seen before.\n\n\"HOLY SHIT! LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT COON!\" I was so impressed by this thing's presence.  When my friends also spotted it, their reaction was nearly identical.  We were all standing at this point, laughing and pointing toward the sewer, screaming about the size of the damn raccoon.\n\nThe car that was parked right behind the sewer turned on.  It took us by surprise as I guess we weren't expecting anybody to be in it for whatever reason, probably because we were intoxicated and didn't notice it when it originally arrived.\n\nThe driver, who never saw the raccoon, rolled his window down as he passed the porch to reveal himself.  He was a large black man with his middle finger up, screaming \"FUCK YOU, YOU RACIST MOTHERFUCKERS!\".  From his perspective, a porch full of young white men suddenly noticed him and then stood up to shout absurd racial slurs at him.", "summary": "TIFU by excitedly acknowledging the size of a raccoon while there was a large black man in that direction (who did not see the raccoon)"}
{"id": "t3_1qk71b", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How long can things on my debit history such as insufficient funds stay there and hurt my credit?", "post": "Okay Reddit, I'm trying to switch to a local credit union from the Devil (AKA Bank of America ) and in the online application process it told me I would be unable to open a checking account with them due to a recent history of insufficient funds.  I've had my BofA account since July 2011 and have only had one occasion where I was declined, this was September 30th of this year. I also applied and was denied a Target credit card earlier last month. My main question to you guys is this:  How long do things like this stay on my history and can affect me? Specifically the insufficient debit fund one.", "summary": "how long after I have a declined debit transaction do I need to wait before applying to open an account at another bank/credit union?"}
{"id": "t3_jfz20", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the most ridiculous misunderstanding you caused?", "post": "More of a literal misunderstanding:\nMy dad needed me to borrow a drill from my neighbors. I was good friends with one of the kids, \"Herpsworth Derpsdriguez\", that lived there. His family was very Dominican and most of them hardly speak English. \n\nSo I rang the doorbell hoping Herpsworth would answer. Instead it was his mother. She looked at me and I said to her \"I'm from next door Ms. Derpsdriguez, I'm wondering if you had a drill I could borrow.\"\n\nShe looked at me flabbergasted with horror and I stood there confused. After about a minute of staring and attempting to hold my fake smile, she finally exclaimed \"... DRUGS?\" and shut the door in my face.", "summary": "Knocked on non-english speaking neighbor's door to borrow a drill, slammed door in my face thinking I wanted drugs"}
{"id": "t3_t7drn", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Those awful hamstrings (advice needed!)", "post": "I know there are some older posts on here about tight hamstrings and running but they didn't quite apply to my situation.\n\nBasically, the past week to two weeks i have significantly (basically, restarted for more than 15/20minutes) running and other various exercises (squats and abs almost exclusively), ans specifically, the past three days really been working at it.  Yesterday when I woke up bilaterally both hamstrings weretight, but i was able to just sit and stretch hands to toes for 5 minutes and they were fine.  sore but fine.  This morning i woke up and literally fell because my legs woulnd't support the weight.  they are still very tender now and it takes me around 5 minutes of straight walking to walk without limping.  i've been drinking plenty of water to increase my BMR but i am at a loss to really specifically what to do.", "summary": "EXTREMELY tight hamstrings bilaterally all the way from knee to ankle, having trouble extending completely and bearing weight/walking."}
{"id": "t3_49jxvn", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [23 M] like someone [22 F] who is in a relationship, what the heck should I do now?", "post": "Good afternoon, everyone. I have a question for you all and I was hoping that I could possibly get some closure and advice on the subject at hand. \n\nAs such, allow me to set the mood. I met \"Sabree\" during my psych class last semester and at that time, I was not looking to date anyone or get into that scene you know? However, once I found out that she works fairly close to my place of employment and naturally, I decided to speak with her just cause. \n\nNonetheless, after a period where I jumped back into the dating scene and failed, I saw her working at her job two Sundays ago and made a very difficult decision. And that was to ask her out for some coffee on Friday and get those digits. However, I had to catch myself because of how nervous I would be. \n\nAs such, after a brief period I finished the mission and boom, got the digits! Excellent, right? \n\nNevertheless, we started to speak and then on Wednesday the bombshell dropped! Originally, we going to reschedule the \"date\" for a later date and she told me the following word by word, \"Sorry! I would try to make it back from Eastern on Friday but I wanted to visit my boyfriend\" \n\nRats, not this again, you know? Nonetheless, she did in fact make it back just in time for us to chill at Starbucks which was her first time there allegedly so I felt pretty cool about that with me stealing a moment away from ole' boy plus giving her the prequel trilogy of Star Wars to watch over so perhaps down the line, I can watch the OT with her. \n\nNonetheless, the point of this question is what the heck should I do going forward? Move on which I plan to do as soon as I can lock in on a few potential women to date or should I continue on and plant the seeds with a slow burning method?", "summary": "got a girl's number, found out that she is taken but we went out last Friday, what's the plan of action from here?"}
{"id": "t3_n56ey", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I think my family is being stalked", "post": "I'll try to make this as short as possible. For the last few months about 330-4 in the morning my wife and I have heard a car drive by. It has an after market muffler so it's very loud and can be heard in our room (which is on the opposite side of the street.) In September she had our baby so that is when I would occasionally hear it while feeding the baby in the middle of the night. I had just assumed whoever this was, was going to work, but the other night my wife was feeding the baby and saw the guy stop at our driveway, pull in and then turn around and leave. Obviously it was the same car because of the muffler. So last night my wife wakes up at 3 and goes into the living room to see if she can see if they do it again. Just as she was about to say screw it and come back to bed she hears the the car, and sure as shit it pulls in our driveway, and leaves. At this point my wife wakes me up quite frantic. So I have her call public safety and see what we should do. They had a detective call her back and they said they would patrol the neighborhood tonight and see if it happens again. Now we do not know if this happens every night or what, but it's kinda creeping me out. We have an alarm and I sleep with a .9 mm under my bed, but we have two children and this is fucked up to say the least. So tonight we are going to wake up at 3 and go into the living room and see if they come back and if they police get his ass. We live in the back of a quiet subdivision, hell I leave my keys in my truck, and nothing has ever been stolen, so for this area where we live it's quite odd. I also cannot think of any good reason this person would be turning around in our driveway. So anyways that's my story. Figured Reddit would be the perfect place to share my story. I will post what happens tomorrow. My question is what in the fuck is this guy doing? Your thoughts are welcome and anticipated. Thanks for reading.", "summary": "Some person keeps turning around in our driveway at 330-4 in the morning. Called the police and they are going to try and catch him tonight. Will post tomorrow if anything happens."}
{"id": "t3_4453jm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "To go or not to go? Old friend (f, 23) getting married, I (f 23) don't want to because I have to go from here in the Netherlands to USA.", "post": "So, I have had this friend for a long time and we have always been there for each other. But about 6 months ago I moved here to the Netherlands to be with my partner (m23). This is our first place together here and we had to buy our own furniture. Needless to say we don't really have any money for trips. \n\nMy friend is getting married in March in the USA and I feel really guilty out of obligation but I really don't want to go. I don't have the money for it and I don't want to leave here and miss my partner. \n\nReasons for not wanting to go:\n\n1. Money\n2. Missing my partner. \n3. Being incredibly bored once I'm there! I won't have a car or a way to get around, so I'll just be sitting in my parents house all day. \n\nI know it's bad that I don't want to go, but I am just really dreading it. \n\nReddit, what do I do?", "summary": "! Friend is getting married in march in the USA, I would have to go there from here in the Netherlands. Don't want to go!"}
{"id": "t3_22dpbn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The woman [21] that I [20] am seeing wants to know about my messy break up with an old friend [24] of hers.", "post": "I've been seeing her for about 2 1/2 months now, and we've really clicked and she brought up the talk about getting serious. Early on we happen to stumble on the fact that my ex used to be a really good friend of her's and they still keep in touch. Last week my ex and her friend (note that I haven't talked to her in around 3 1/2 months) spread some bullshit around campus about me. It got back to the woman I'm seeing now and I've noticed that she's immediately started treating me differetly. She wants to talk about exactly what happened betweenmy ex and myself. I would you proceed in this situation? Is this a lost cause? It's really worrying me.", "summary": "ex is old friend of woman I'm seeing, spread rumors about me that got back to current love interest, she wants to talk and it scares the hell out of me."}
{"id": "t3_2q0982", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I being unreasonable about my [26F] boyfriend's[26M] behavior?", "post": "A few weeks ago our neighbor, who is also our friend, invited us over for her friend's going away party that she's hosting. Her friend is moving across the country. \n\nMy boyfriend knows our neighbor's friend because his ex girlfriend slept with her (cheated on him with her, sort of). He's seen her around town and he tried to sleep with her long before we got together. He's made a few comments on her looks in the last few days before the party -- big boobs, big butt, \"she's actually pretty attractive\". This doesn't bother me, but I know I'm not his go-to type. I'm petite, but I bust my ass at the gym doing squats to try and get the booty going for us.\n\nLast night was the party. He was out late working until 1:30 AM or so. I left the party around 11. When he came home I was already in my robe. He's not super social and prefers to stay home and relax with me, but for some reason he expressed the desire to stop by our neighbor's party. This was weird because he doesn't really care about the people at the party and in previous situations had passed on seeing them. He had been standing for four hours solid, hauling his heavy gear, and it was 2AM. He insisted on going anyway, which I was fine with.\n\nThis morning she added him on Facebook and he accepted. This made me uncomfortable when I looked at the culmination of things (previous flirting, the comments the week before, and that he went out of his way to talk to her at the party and tell me about it when he got home. He was only at the party for 15 minutes or so). I expressed my discomfort and he got defensive and angry.\n\nAm I being unreasonable?", "summary": "boyfriend has a history of flirting with a girl, she adds him on Facebook, I feel weird about it. Is that wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_38slck", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by writing a smartass final paper", "post": "So actually happened a few years ago...\n\nSALLLYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!\n\nwas my Freshman writing seminar instructor may her name be cursed for a thousand generations. The topic was \"great new books.\" Being an open-minded starry-eyed freshman, I thought this would mean \"fiction.\" Nope. Poetry. Shit. \n\nSo Sally always insisted that all of our analytical essays were full of cultural stereotypes. This was really difficult to avoid and got on everyone's nerves, particularly because all the poetry we were reading was really heavy stuff and had to do with race, inequality, poverty, etc. It felt like we couldn't even mention race without being \"insensitive.\" Fast forward to the final paper.\n\nSally has a friend who is an impoverished poet, and Sally assigns us her book (called \"a vertical interrogation of strangers\") to read. The book is basically a collection of poetry based on the author's interviews with anonymous Indian women regarding their (often abusive) relationships to men. I choose to write about this book for the final paper. I have had enough of Sally and her lectures on \"stereotypes\" at this point. In fact, I am so tired of her that I become convinced that her friend's book is a giant cultural stereotype. I think you can get where this is going...\n\nYup I decide to write my paper on how my professor's starving poet friend's super artsy feminist book is actually a cultural stereotype and unfair to Indian men. At the time I thought I made a pretty good argument and was looking forward to changing my professor's perspective on things...\n\n...C-\n\nfreshman mistake", "summary": "When I was a Freshman I decided to write my final paper on how my professor's friend's feminist artsy book was actually a giant cultural stereotype and unfair to men. Freshman mistake."}
{"id": "t3_2om1b0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm extremely crazily jealous [20/F] with my bf [20] and there's no reason at all, I know he wouldn't cheat on me, but I can't help it. Long distance love btw.", "post": "Almost every day we discuss/fight about my fears, about being cheated or changed, or being left behind. Our clocks are 7 hours difference and that makes it even worse.\n\nI know he loves me, and he wouldn't never hurt me, I understand it, and I'm fine until I start to overthink and I get insanely crazy about it. I'm also pretty secure about myself, i have a good self esteem, but when I think about other girls they suddenly look like they have something that make them better for him than me. \n\nIt gets so but so so so hard to deal every night, I dream about him fucking random girls and \nI'm afraid of losing us every night.\n\nIf someone have read \"the unbearable lightness of being\", I'm exactly Theresa, but without the real cheat from her partner. \nDeep inside knowing that is all bullshit, not true and is just in my mind.\n\nHe's most of the time really patient and supportive with that, but I'm afraid he's getting sick of it, like it's obvious. \nI'm also getting so tired I have suggested several times to break up, not because I want to, but because it seems to be the only way to let it go and being relax again. But he's telling me we won't break up because of this. I'm really exhausted of this thoughts because they're there every second.\n\nI've spent weeks reading about jealousy, and it haven't help.\n\nI need to stop and I really don't know how.", "summary": "I know my bf would never do anything to hurt me but almost everyday i find myself crying imagining he will. I need an advice please."}
{"id": "t3_1wug7r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[22/F] friend[24/M] keeps looking at my chest, how to get him to stop?", "post": "So occasionally when I[22/F] hang out with a good friend[24/M] (No flirting he knows my boyfriend) I caught him staring on a few different occasions. We've been friends for a year. I don't wear low cut shirts, but when I bend over to pick something up and look up he's staring. If I put my knees up to my chest when we're watching a movie on the couch he looks over. It's not even a subtle look just a blank stare. I don't know how to act it makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable. \nI called him out on it once and he said he wasn't staring.. So I'm not too sure how to bring this to his attention. Any ideas?", "summary": "Caught guy friend staring at my chest, called him out he denied it. Caught him recently, how can I bring this to his attention?"}
{"id": "t3_4npxid", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [M/18] go back [F/18] with my ex?", "post": "So we broke up due to I haven't showed her much affection. She brought it up, she lost hope. And then after, I talked to another girl, but we talked and she got all flirty, I stopped talking to her cause I know she'll get too attached. She's attractive yes. \n\nAfter that, I realized I still need to get over my ex. However, in some way we managed to talk, Reddit, do I love her? Yes I do, I still have some feelings for her. She's gorgeous and the personality is gold. But she broke up with me for some reason, I wasn't showing affection. I'm scared of that, I wont be able to give her that, I don't feel like I would go in full heartily. Because the last of couple of months, I've been stressed about school, work, what college to go to (it will be distance if we get back together) and most importantly, I am not myself for this past month. \n\nI feel like I've lost myself. And that I am tired of relationships, I feel like burned out, I don't know what to do. I love her yes, maybe not like before, and she's great yeah. Should I get try to get her back and build it slowly there or just break it off? I'll be meeting her later today.\n\nAnd I feel a little guilty of wanting to talk to the other girl, maybe cause I miss talking but I'll ignore that for now. \n\nI'm just trying to fill everything up right now so you guys understand, but any thoughts? Questions?", "summary": "We've talked back and forth, I know she loves me, I know that I love her, but I don't feel like the way it used to do. Butterflies and shit. What should I do."}
{"id": "t3_1pdtr9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, how can I fix myself?", "post": "To put things short, I've had a pretty inadequate life so far. I'm ugly, short, underweight and not all that intelligent either.\n\n I have very few skills or interests, I have very few friendships (most of which are dwindling rapidly), I can't speak to women without either mumbling unintelligibly and apologizing in my head to them for daring to come into their presence, and I cannot for the life of me imagine a future where I don't end up killing myself. \n\nOver the years I've developed an almost crippling fear of people my age to the point where I can barely introduce myself to anyone who isn't at least forty years older than me.\nI am ruled by a subconscious council of people who mocked me in the past and I'm pretty much keeping my behaviour in regulation of how they would expect me to behave. I am living as the caricature they established of me, I am fulfilling the future they planned out for me.\nI have almost forgotten what it's like to be content with life, I am ruled by an enormous apathy for my own existence. I can't eat properly, I can't sleep properly, I've tried going to therapy but I always find myself switching off to whatever's said as I believe my perspective to be infallible. Am I really not meant for existence? Just some genetic mishap that wasn't meant to continue living? \nWhat can I do to? I'm pretty much coming to you guys because I have no other outlet to express my pathetic rambling, for almost half a year I've dedicated most of my life to mindlessly browsing Reddit, seeing the interesting lives of others and wishing I had the same. I guess it would be fitting that the life-changing advice that I've been sifting through countless platitudes for comes from the place I most frequent.\n\nI don't particularly want to end up as 'That guy who killed himself' but it's looking more and more likely. I don't want to end up living the life that's apparently been allotted to me. \n\nI'm sorry you read this far.", "summary": "Some random cunt rambles on about his pathetic existence, begs for compassion and/or an enlightening epiphany."}
{"id": "t3_27rmkx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (18M) sister (23F) is going through cancer for the 3rd time and I'm terrified.", "post": "I've been through the rounds so many times that everything just feels dull whenever cancer is brought up. My 23 year old sister is going through her 3rd kind of cancer in her life and I'm at the point where I don't know how to feel anymore.\n\nWe came to America from Syria when I was very young because both my sister and my twin brother had cancer at the same time (him, testicular, her, brain) for the better medical treatment options available in the states and we've been here ever since trying to deal with a new life and new surroundings. Sadly, my twin died when we were around seven,  but my sister survived both the brain cancer and the pancreatic cancer that sprang up on us about five years ago.\n\nSurprisingly still, she survived that as well, but as far as I can surmise, some of the tumor was not removed and it ended up growing around the stomach. Recently, she has barely been able to eat more than a bite for the entire day and if she tries, she ends up throwing everything up. She's nearing barely eighty pounds and is always in pain.\n\nI'm constantly surrounded by the emotional trauma and stress of a family in crisis and I don't know what to do anymore. My dad has worked himself dry trying to support a family and a sick child, and we've all come out of these struggles with more scars than we can count.\n\nI love her dearly and even though we don't talk and aren't the closest, simply imagining her not being a part of my life anymore makes me shut down. She's going for her first appointment to schedule chemo tomorrow and because of how I've dealt with all this I have a horrible aversion to hospitals.\n\nHow am I supposed to show her that I care? How am I supposed to be the strong one in this family? How am I supposed to keep on going? I can't do anything and I feel like everything is crumbling around me.", "summary": "my family has dealt with cancer for my entire life and I am at a breaking point. I just wish I could find meaning in all this."}
{"id": "t3_4lnlo6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22m] brother in law [30m]hit my sister", "post": "Hopefully I can depict this well enough.\n\nBackground, they've been married for 3 years, in laws dad lives with them because he got into an accident ..in law always seemed like a good guy. \n\nOkay, so 2 months back, my pregnant sister called our house the day before her birthday, telling us to come pick her up.\n\nWe went and first thing I see is everything is messed up...she's crying, he's laying on the bed. We ask him whats wrong, and he says he doesn't want to talk about it.\n\nWe leave with my sister and she tells us she was pissed off at taking care of his dad 24\\7, and an argument took off from that, nothing happened for a while but they were laying on the bed when my sister was looking at pics of our grandma that past away recently...she was crying and he thought she was crying because of the fight and hit her to prevent \"harm\" to the baby..and apparently this is the second time it's happened.\n\nWe came home noticed her nose was bleeding, she was so determined to get a divorce, but she changed her mind a couple of days after he sent a letter \"apologizing\". \n\nI feel guilty because maybe I shouldve hit him for touching my sister, but I have a habit of ruining relationships so I didn't do anything.\n\nNow my parents are back and idk how but they talked thru it and now want us siblings to forget about it and act as if everything is normal.", "summary": "my in law hit my pregnant sister the day before her birthday and now my parents want us to act as if everything is okay."}
{"id": "t3_3e3vsv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (24F) just started seeing a guy (31M) that considers himself polyamorous. I don't know what to do.", "post": "So I've been talking with this guy online for a few months, and things have been going really well.  I have some intimacy issues, but it's amazed me how able I was to be upfront about my issues with him (as he has been with me) before even having met him. I have definitely been developing feelings for him.\n\nI finally met him last night, and it was amazing.  We cuddled all night long, had amazing sex, and I just felt so safe and content.  I am developing feelings for this guy fast.  The problem is, he confessed that he's polyamorous, meaning that he doesn't feel fulfilled unless he is able to have several 'committed' relationships.  I don't have any problem with this idea in theory, but in practice, in my own life, I'm struggling with it.\n\nIt might help to know that I shut out dating due to trauma and those intimacy issues for a long time, and I've only recently started dating.  I've had nothing but horrible luck up to this point in the guys I've seen, and this guy feels like something different.  Like I could actually see something develop.  But due to my deep insecurities and intimacy issues, I don't know if/how I could do this.  I am already in therapy for these issues, by the way.\n\nHas anyone been in a similar boat?  Would you be able to do this in my shoes?  I want to hear whatever your input is, because I'm totally lost.", "summary": "Don't know if/how I can start a relationship with someone who is polyamarous.  Any input is greatly appreciated!"}
{"id": "t3_3j2djl", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Tifu by not asking out a girl sooner.", "post": "DISCLAIMER: I am in highschool and this happened a week ago.\n\nThere was this girl who said she liked me and that she needed someone to talk to because \"everyone hates her\", so we started talking. After a while we got close, I would walk her to classes and she would give me a hug every time i walk her, but after a while she stopped talking to me because some guy made a move on her. So apparently she was in-between me and this other guy at the time. She picked him, over me even though i would walk her to classes, even ditch one to see her this one time, but in the end he won. She started to not reply to my messages even though i made it clear to her that I would want us to be just friends. A while later, i went to start another convo on facebook with her, and it had appeared that i couldn't reply to her anymore, nor could I view her profile. I had found out she had blocked me. I'm assuming her new bf told her to block me on all social medias because he probably saw our previous messages, why i assume this is because we had talked before and whenever I would bring up the girl he would make an angry facial expression and also because he had also blocked me. So after I found out I was complaining to a best friend about this and he messaged the girl about how she had me blocked and she said \"I didn't know\". So fast forward till this day and she still has me blocked even after my friend confronted her. Well I guess I'm not going to talk to her anytime soon.", "summary": "A girl told me she loved me, she ended up picking another guy over me, that guy badly influenced her, and now I'm here alone thinking what could've been."}
{"id": "t3_3tj6se", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my wife [22 F] , has problems recognizing when she treats me bad, and finds it difficult to apologize", "post": "My wife is mostly super nice and caring to me. However, she can have very bad mood swings over the most stupid stuff. Today she got mad at me and then we talked about it. However, 3 hours later from when we woke up from our nap, she asks me to check the weather and then yells \" Hurry up!!\". I immediately got annoyed and told her to check herself. She then left to work without saying bye. I didn't text her or talked to her not even when she was back. She tried to tickle me and be silly but I just wasn't having it. She never apologizes and I've talked about this with her. I've told her that I do not like being yelled at. She says she was stressed out and that I made her mad because I didn't want to go to the mall to change 3 shirts she bought.\n\nHow can I show her that I really am angry and will not tolerate shit like this? I am the type of person that speaks up whenevers theres a problem or I am upset. However, she tries to avoid it by saying whatever or just justifying her actions. I've tried talking to her but she just says \"ok\" and then forgets about it.", "summary": "My wife often yells at me and mistreats me over stupid stuff, I tried talking to her but point doesn't get across"}
{"id": "t3_3nxhny", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] really like a girl [19 F] from my uni. Is she bad at texting or is she not interested?", "post": "So I've [21 M] recently begun falling for a girl [19 F] from my university and when we're in person we get along fantastically. I've known her for about a year now but only just recently started talking/hanging out more after we both showed up to a party where we knew literally nobody but the host and we just ended up talking a bunch (mind you aside from this one instance at the party we've only hung out in groups of mutual friends thusfar). But after I got her number it seems that she is pretty bad at the whole texting thing. What I mean by this is just basically if I text her she will either take quite a while to respond to my message or she just won't respond at all (even sometimes if the text has a question in it). And so far after probably a little more than a month being decent friends she has NEVER initiated the texts, it has always been me. Recently at a school bar night we were both drunk and she literally dragged me to the dance floor with her (which is extremely abnormal for me) so I'm thinking this was a sign of interest. But even after that the texting still continues to be the same.\n\nBasically I'm worried because most everyone I've talked to says \"no girl is bad at texting, if she actually likes you she would initiate/text you back/respond in a timely matter. Get over her she's not interested\". So I guess my question really is, is it possible for someone to be a bad texter like that but still be genuinely interested in me? Or should I just accept the fact that if she did like me she would put a little more effort into texting me?", "summary": "Get along well with girl in person, but she seems to be bad at texting. Is she really just bad at texting or is she not interested?"}
{"id": "t3_443s0u", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by forgetting my keys in locker", "post": "This happened just a few hours ago. \n\nI went to my school's gym today like any other day, and today is leg day. Wonderful. I must also note that I was tired from staying up all night finishing an assignment, but I had a good 6 hour nap at school since I finished early today. Did my work out; leg press, leg curls, leg extensions, calf raises, etc. As I was walking back to the locker room, I saw a group of females coming through. Must be the girls' volleyball team. I went to grab my stuff to go shower; towel, body wash, and shampoo, and before I realized it, I locked my locker with my keys in them. It didn't process until I turned on the water. Now here I am, luckily with a towel, realizing I forgot my keys so I decided to go to the front desk. Luckily for me, our gym was small so the front wasn't too far. Unluckily, the girls' volleyball team was still waiting in the halls as the gymnasium was being set up. I went to ask if they would cut my lock for me, and thinking my towel was wrapped tightly enough, it broke loose...in front of probably 12 or 15 girls, and a few other pass byers...I booked it straight back into the change room, and just sat there and let everything process slowly. The guy at the front couldn't stop laughing, said he felt so bad for me and that all the girls are laughing as well...\n\nAll I can hope for is that no one else knew me, and everything will just disappear and nothing ever happened. I don't think I can show my face at school tomorrow...", "summary": "forgot keys in gym locker, had nothing but a towel, ask for lock cut, dropped towel instead by accident in front of girls volleyball team."}
{"id": "t3_29j54n", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Founder of my company has lost my trust...", "post": "I have been working as a developer for a company for about a year of less than 10 employees. During that time, someone got put into a managerial role (that I did not agree with) and got fired afterwards; another developer has left; my founder has talked behind the backs of two other employees; my founder has not shown any recognition for hard work that has been done by employees (including myself); has shown a lack therefore of general leadership qualities (acknowledgement, compassion, direction, motivation, or hardwork);  and most of all I haven't got paid for the last 6 months (2 of which I was on medical leave) -- with hopes to finally get paid this week *crosses-fingers*.\n\nThroughout this time, the founder has not acknowledged there is actually a money problem and commonly would issue checks that would end up bouncing at the end of the day just to make people quiet. Even to this day, how things are currently running is a mystery with the team being remotely scattered.\n\nThe founder is also an old friend of mine, but things have run pretty thin from this experience due to the lack of general respect.\n\nWould you quit and move on? or would you give another chance at trying to continue with this job? I feel like I have already chosen to leave but I am having second thoughts.", "summary": "Founder is a friend, has made some extremely poor leadership decisions and my trust has been hurt. Is there any hope to save this, or should I just find a new job?"}
{"id": "t3_1zgl0b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] am too needy with my boyfriend [21M]. How can I stop?", "post": "**Background**: I have been dating my boyfriend for half a year - it's my first relationship.\n\nWe get along great when we're with each other (2-3 times a week), and text each other moderately when we're apart. Mostly jokes to make each other laugh. We communicate pretty openly and don't fight. But there's something I don't want to talk about with him.\n\n**Problem**: I'm incredibly needy when we're apart! I constantly wait for his texts and invitations to hang out, and am disappointed when he doesn't for a few or several hours (but he texts me at least a few times everyday). Not only am I disappointed, but I get scared he's losing interest in me! Sometimes I feel offended, like he doesn't put the effort in anymore to talk to me while we're apart. It makes me feel painful, alone, and sad (ugh). But then we meet in person, and everything - having fun, getting work done, the sexy times, talking - is great 90% of the time, with minor bumps here and there. So it's become obvious to me that, because this is my first relationship and I care about him quite a lot, I have become paranoid and overly needy (uggghhhh).\n\nHe's already assured me many times he likes me, and I know that neediness/clingy-ness in any relationship is annoying and tiresome to deal with. Also, breaking up is really sad, but not the end of the world. Still, I can't resolve my feelings. \n\n**Question**: I can't believe I ended up being this type of girlfriend! What can I do to get my bf off my mind all the time, and how can I not be bothered by his lack of texting when he's busy/tired/doesn't have much to say? Has anyone else had this problem?", "summary": "I'm needy and disappointed when my boyfriend doesn't contact me often enough when we're apart. But expecting him to do more to reassure me is just being unreasonable. How can I mentally slap myself to stop these clingy feelings?"}
{"id": "t3_2y5sf4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] GF [23F] of 5 months, just got a job a few hours away. Need help on making a LDR work", "post": "So my gf and I have been dating for 5 months and it has been incredible. She is honestly the sweetest, best person I have met, and we just click! I am currently in a crazy part of my schooling where I am constantly busy. She has been amazing with it, has never nagged me when all I could do was come over and study, and for that I am so grateful as school has cost me 2 relationships already.\n\nWell she has been wanting to move to a city 2 hours away from us since I met her, I just never thought it would happen this fast. I have been planning on moving to the same city for about 2 years now, just need to finish my schooling. Well she just got offered a job so will probably be moving in the next few weeks. I am beyond excited for her, but I am stuck here until August at the earliest. After this term my crazy schedule calms down ALOT, so that will let me go and see her.\n\nWe have both talked, and we both love where the relationship is, and want to do the long distance thing until I move to the same city. She has done the long distance thing before and said it was bad, it was a few states away, for a year and a half, and was hesitant to do it again, understandably. We talked and I said I am not 20 hours or more away, I am 2. This isn't for a year and a half with no end it sight, it's until August or september, I have planned to move there as well since before I met her so it wouldn't be me following her. She then sounded much more at ease about the situation. \n\nWhat I am wanting to know is how can I make a LDR work well? I plan on visiting her whenever I get a chance, which is sparingly, but what else can I do? This girl is seriously wonderful so I want to make this as easy for her as possible.", "summary": "Girlfriend is moving 2 hours away, I can't move until late august/early september, what's the best way to make a LDR work in the mean time?"}
{"id": "t3_2e1dno", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'd [16 M] hate to have feelings for her [16 F].", "post": "I know, I know, it is generic. We have known each other for about 5 years now, and in that time we have become the best of friends. We've established that no matter what happens in our friendship, that we will never cuddle, kiss, or have feelings for each other. \n\nBut recently we have been communicating non-stop and sometimes I just feel like I may have feelings for this person. But I am afraid to say something about it or point it out in the event that she won't continue being my friend, which is what's more important to me than dating her. We were talking the other day about what we look for in a partner, and I listed some things, (I am [trait], enjoy [verb], and have [noun].) and her response to that was basically, \"But dude, I am [trait], enjoy [verb], and have [noun].\", with the EXACT same things I listed. It made me pause and think that maybe she said that in the hopes I would get a mother fucking hint. But I dunno. She told me she did some stuff with this guy, and for some reason it really set me off.\n\n And now I can't stop thinking about her, but at the same time, I know I shouldn't think about her in this way. I wish I could simply tell her how I feel. It's basic Middle school bullshit, but it's driving me nuts and starting to stress me out. It's like this little guy tugging at my shirt telling me to be sad about it and stuff, telling me to not be able to enjoy my life without her.", "summary": "I'm afraid I'm falling for my best friend, sometimes I feel like she feels the same way but if I told her how I feel, I may lose her as a friend."}
{"id": "t3_3sm16t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my [22 M] 2 month, roommate and I'm sick of him having friends over to smoke weed and use our stuff", "post": "Kind of an unconventional post here, but here it goes:\n\nMy roommate is a guy that smokes a ton of weed at just about any hour of the day. In fact, I heard him fill up his bong at 9 this morning in the sink near my room. I'm cool with him smoking weed, I mean you do you, bud. What I'm not cool with is his blasting music when I'm trying to do work (we share a wall), the awful smell that comes from his room seeping in to mine (again, right next to each other), and the sheer number of people that come over for an indefinite amount of time (the door is literally unlocked so his friends can walk in whenever). These guys use our water at a rate that I'm not okay to split with my roommie at our agreed 50-50 rate. These guys use our toilet paper at a rate that I can't afford and have been stuck in a situation where I've had to hobble out to the drug store to buy more twice so far. These guys order pizza every night and then my roommate makes a big deal when I ask him to buy dish soap or do a fucking chore. In fact, as I was writing this, another guy walked in and he cleared his bong. IM. FUCKING. DONE.", "summary": "Roommate smokes weed with his friends. Super disruptive. Won't pay for anything and makes a big stink about me asking him for help."}
{"id": "t3_31jsu0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21M] here. GF [19F] who I've been dating for 2 months is now acting strange. What to do?", "post": "Hello everyone. I've been dating this girl for about two months and I liked her very much (still do). From what I understood she liked me very much too (even maybe more). From the very beginning she was super friendly, almost always texted me first, and so on. She even initiated our first kiss herself. \n\nNow here's the problem. About a week and a half ago she started to act weirdly. When asked why, she said she's exhausted because of the things in her university and lessons at the choir she's singing in. And yeah, she's been really busy, a lot of concerts and blahblah. She also said, that she's sad or something, springtime sadness she called it.\n \n\n6 days ago I asked her (through text, because she has a free week and is at family's home in different city) to tell me if she still liked me or is she tired of me, because I'm not a fan of her being like that. She said, that she's confused, kind of isolated from people or from communication and doesn't know why is she like that.\n\nI was told by her to relax because she's thinking about things and doesn't want to do a mistake and that everything will be clear after that free week of hers. Then I told her \"I kind of sense where this is going. Tell me when you're finished thinking. See you don't know when\". She said \"OK, see you soon\". It's been about 6 days without any contact and that free week is ending tomorrow.\n\nSorry for the long text and for my bad english, but I'm feeling really sad and confused, trying hard not to text her. What should I do? Have anyone ever dealt with something similar? PLEASE HELP.", "summary": "Girl which I really clicked with became distant, strange and said she's confused and doesn't want to do a mistake. No contact for six days. Help please?"}
{"id": "t3_vvfpk", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is it always best to save the confrontation/doubts? (4 months relationship)", "post": "Besides what I'm about to say, there is absolutely nothing wrong with our relationship (me 21/m and her, 21/f). I feel there is very strong love between us, and we've pretty much exposed every part of our lives to one another.    \n\nShe's a heavy user (not poster, but rather \"stalker\") of social networks. A lot of the time she quickly \"homescreens\" when I look at her using her phone, where I'd catch a glimpse of Facebook/Instagram. When using my PC/iPad, she'd sometimes clear the brower history after use.    \n\nIn a relationship where we've agreed to be open about everything, I just find this little thing biting away at me.    \n\nShould I just feign ignorance since nothing is wrong? Or should I confront her about it?", "summary": "GF likes to cover her tracks/generally secretive when using social networks. However, nothing wrong is with our very open-to-each-other relationship so far. Should I confront her?"}
{"id": "t3_32qqeo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] wondering how to proceed with asking out a girl [16F]", "post": "Okay, so I'm not really the kind of guy who's too open about feelings and relationships and all that, but there is this girl who I see at school and sit next to in class that I really like.\n\nWe share one class together, sit next to each other and often have conversations. We don't really see each other outside of class, walking in the halls and all that, but when I walk into class and sit down, she will ask me how I am and I will return the question. She seems generally cheerful to see me, but I don't know if this is in a romantic way or if I'm just being hopeful. \n\nI really like her and would like to ask her on a date, but I'm not sure how to proceed. I know how to cook and was considering asking her to dinner (and then cooking said dinner). I also have had no previous relationships so I'm not sure if this is a good thing to do (dinner), and I'm not sure how to ask her. Help me please.", "summary": "Girl I share a class with and have a friendly relationship with. I want to ask her to dinner (my cooking), but I don't know if I should or how to ask. 1st potential girlfriend. Super nervous. Help."}
{"id": "t3_mbffe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need help/advice - how do you cope with the sense of loss over the threat of 'breaking up' with your best friend? (xpost from /r/AskReddit)", "post": "Basically, over the course of the last 6 months or so, I've slowly started to come to the realization that we may just not really have much commonality between us anymore. It seems we pretty much subscribe to different philosophies for almost everything, and while in the past 15 years this has never been a problem, lately it has been escalating. Part of me wonders if I'm just being the asshole that can't just overlook the differences anymore, but she's become increasingly defensive of her viewpoints even when no argument is taking place (partly catalyzed by her boyfriend whose philosophies are exactly in line with hers, so even when it's just the two of us hanging out it feels like a two-on-one - and I know part of my feelings from this are jealousy). I am just deeply disturbed by the idea of losing her as a friend due to some what SHOULD BE insignificant differences and I'm feeling more depressed than ever since that last big argument. I could go on and on but seeing as this probably won't even be read by anyone, I'll keep the details for later if there is actual interest.", "summary": "I need help figuring out how to cope with sense of loss from the fact that my long time best friend and I are slowly \"breaking up\""}
{"id": "t3_j7aim", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend is trying to stick his dick in crazy. The crazy mentioned is myself. Please tell me how to stop him.", "post": "Throwaway, because my main account is known to people in RL who should probably remain ignorant of this. Large amount of text to follow:\n\nI am 19, female. He is 20. We have known each other since elementary school and were best friends starting in junior high. We have a great relationship and are mutually supportive. However, he has recently been expressing an interest in me that I do not reciprocate.  \n\nHe's constantly touching me, bringing up the topic of sex (porn he's watched, asking what I like, etc.), and joking that he can't wait to sleep with me. When I came out as lesbian, he thought I was lying to make him stop, which was completely untrue. This makes me uncomfortable, to put it lightly, and I've asked him to cease and desist numerous times, but he always sort of shrugs it off. \n\nHere's the summary of my brand of crazy: I am diagnosed with rapid-cycling bipolar I disorder, which is the mental equivalent of getting every STD at once. I've been dealing with it for most of my life now and the meds give me an ultra-low sex drive. I also have a massive aversion to being touched because of physical abuse in my youth. I do not come to my friend with my emotional problems; that's what my therapist is for, and I don't want to burden him. He knows the details, but he has never personally witnessed an episode because I am always doped up.\n\nHe kind of presses all my buttons in the wrong way. Last time I rejected him, he threatened to 'deprioritize' me on his list of friends, saying that if we weren't taking this relationship any further then he didn't want to invest so much time in it. He apologizes afterwards but I do feel scared and sort of lost. \n\nReddit, he is literally my only friend and I don't want to lose him. More importantly, I don't want to lead him on. I'm not ready for a relationship of any sort - I have uni and personal demons to face. How can I get him to back off and stop trying to stick his dick in crazy?", "summary": "I am a lesbian with low sex drive and personal space issues. My only friend is hitting on me and this makes me sad. Please tell me how to gently dissuade him without alienating him forever."}
{"id": "t3_3dr4zn", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Being pushed to quit my job", "post": "I have a job that was just supposed to be for the summer, they knew from when I started a few months ago but I wasn't getting the hours I needed from there so I applied somewhere else too so I would have around 20 hours a week. My manager seemed fine with it but just needed the person that does scheduling to know that I'll only stay there on weekends. I was told later that day they that I don't have tomorrow off or a week off to go on vacation with my family. They knew I needed these days off at least a month ago and they said it was fine that I can't come in. They also wanted to transfer me closer to where I'm going to school which would be fine but they want to do it now and I can't drive 45 minutes a day to work a 4 hour shift at most. The other place I applied to knew that I would be working two jobs and I think they called in to the store as a reference to see what kind of worker I was because they also knew where I applied to without me telling them the name of the other place. I feel like they gave me a bad reference because I haven't heard back from the second place yet. Should I quit before they transfer me too far away and won't be able to show up and get fired?", "summary": "Feel like I'm being pushed to quit my job because I was looking for a second job to get more hours before school starts"}
{"id": "t3_3ya4an", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31 M] is mad at my girlfriend [31 F] for egoism. Do I overreact?", "post": "We spent Christmas time at our own families and agreed that I would drive 3 hours to her after I did the same route on 23rd from her to my place. \n\nShe went out with friends to party last night and I asked her to not go completely crazy so when I drive another 3 hours on 2nd day of Christmas, we can spend some time. Turns out she came home completely drunk at 6:30 am. I just feel really mad and I can't help it. \n\nI find this to be very egoistic as I sacrifice time with my family and friends just to be with her while she stayed full time with her family and on top got super drunk at the school reunion.\n\nI am planning not to drive there today and spent at least one more day with my family but I would want to do this mostly because I want to show her I am mad.\n\nShould I not got today and wait another day as some sort of punishment or go anyways?\n\nThis is not how I imagined Christians to be :/ \n\nThank you and merry Christmas.", "summary": "GF reacted egoistically and went out party like crazy while I make sacrifices and try to drive to her on christmas. Should I not go see her today but only go tommorow?"}
{"id": "t3_37c8yd", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "IUD Experience?", "post": "Hello everyone. I am a 22 year old male and my 21 year old girlfriend of ~9 months has decided to begin IUD birth control. We have done research on it and along with her Gynecologist she has decided that this is the direction she wants to go. \n\nShe is getting the procedure done today and I'd like to do something nice for her when shes all finished. Does anyone have any experience with IUD's and the procedure associated? I want to know what to expect after the procedure. I know she will be sore and can expect some cramping, but are there any pieces of advice you may have for me as her boyfriend? Any snacks you desperately wanted, over-the-counter things that you HAD to have, etc? I appreciate any feedback about possible gifts/goodies for her or the procedure itself.", "summary": "My girlfriend is getting an IUD today. What can I expect as a boyfriend and what could I do for her to make today better?"}
{"id": "t3_m39x5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Serious question time: should I keep my current job or get something else?", "post": "I'm a truck driver, and usually make a pretty good living. But I just moved to a new town and had a hard time getting work because as a driver, most companies prefer to hire someone who \"knows\" the area.\n\nI got a job with this person who owns one truck and has a single contract for that truck. When he hired me he told me I would have work coming out my ears, but it's been over three months and work has actually slowed down. And it doesn't look like he's trying very hard to drum up more work.\n\nMoneywise, He pays me enough to cover my bills, but that's it. BUT keep in mind some days I don't work at all and I usually average about 3 hours worth of actual work per day when I do work so in fairness I'm getting the better part of the deal.\n\nBut here's the thing. I believe he's starting to have money troubles as all I can get from him for gas is 100 dollars at a time. And this time he didn't put the money into my bank account until I pestered him for it today.\n\nAnd it was from a different family members account too.\n\nSo should I confront him about it, or just give him two weeks notice right now and look for something better. Keep in mind I actually like the guy for a boss and have had no problems at all with him work wise. And he has paid me promptly and on time so far. I just found the use of someone else's bank account a red flag to me", "summary": "my current boss may be having money troubles. should I talk to him about it or abandon ship even though I have no problems with him."}
{"id": "t3_1jhtr9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[25F] want to break up with my SO [23M] of 2 years but I'm broke and don't have many options.", "post": "So we dated long distance for a year, then I moved, and now we have lived together for a year. I think it's a pretty standard case of me finding out that we're actually not compatible. There are no glaring problems, I'm just increasingly not happy in the relationship as a whole and I know I would be much happier single.\n\nThe problem is that I don't have any money. When I first moved, I couldn't find a job for 6 months. The city I moved to has one of the highest unemployment rates in the country and despite a university degree and literally hundreds of applications, it took me a long time to finally find a part-time job in retail. During those 6 months, I used up all my savings even though my SO paid for the majority of the expenses. He can afford it since he has a very high paying job.\n\nNow I've reached the point where I've paid off my debt but just don't have the savings to live on my own. My city just happens to also be one of the most expensive places to live and I'm starting school again in the fall. I just can't figure out what my options are. My family doesn't live in the same place and I have commitments where I am so I can't just move back home.\n\nI've been keeping up appearances in my relationship for a couple months now but it's not fair to my SO and it's draining for me. What on earth should I do?", "summary": "I want to end my relationship with my live-in SO but I don't have the money to live on my own."}
{"id": "t3_3due2f", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU while going for a movie", "post": "This is my first post in /r/TIFU, so please bear with me.\n\nLike your regular FU, this takes place few hours back. The scene is i'm waiting for my parents to get out the house and i'm running a bit late for a movie. So in my anxious wait. i decide to speed up things a little by taking the car (rented one) out of the porch and outside the gate to minimize anymore delay (Mistake 1). So while reversing, i noticed one corner was a bit too close to the gate so i asked my watchman to stand there and see if its all good. I see him through the mirror and he signals me saying it's all good, so i happily continue reversing (Mistake 2). After a few seconds, i hear a breaking sound, immediately stopped the car and got out to see one half of the bumper guard (an additional bumper infront of the main car bumper) broke off as it got caught in the gate while reversing which i couldn't see. Hearing the breaking sound, my dad comes out and sees the bumper, and hasn't said a word about it yet. I googled the replacement bumper and it costs around $140. My dad and I are not exactly on good terms so i don't know how or when he is going to react and i'm still in college, so I can't exactly pay for the damages.", "summary": "Running late for a movie, ended up breaking a $140 rented car bumper, dad hasn't said a word, Mindfuck"}
{"id": "t3_u9pcw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend and I are away from each other for the summer. Even though I trust her fully, I still get these feelings of angst and fear that the relationship will not last. Help?", "post": "My girlfriend (19) and I (19/m) have been dating for 5 months now. I was given this awesome opportunity to work as an intern halfway across the country for the whole summer, from May 18 - August 25. I took the offer. My girlfriend and I have a very stable and happy relationship but we have never been away from each other for more than a week. Now we are away from each other for 3 months. We either text, call, or skype on a daily basis.\n\nMy girlfriend is incredibly beautiful and there are obviously guys who take interest in her. Sometimes these guys still pursue her even though they know that shes dating me. I don't believe my girlfriend is much of a flirt and she draws the line where it needs to be drawn. I have FULL trust in her. Bottom line: I have NO apparent reason to doubt her or have any fear of losing her because we constantly communicate and are honest with each other.\n\nLadies and gentlemen, I love this woman. I could potentially see myself spending the rest of my life with her. I don't understand why I still have these feelings and fears that I will lose her even though i put my FULL trust in her. I have talked to her about this and she has told me that she sometimes has the same exact feelings of insecurity about me being with other women even though she puts her full trust in me. Have any of you experienced this? What can I/we do?", "summary": "Girlfriend and I are halfway across the country from each other for 3 months. I still have fears that the relationship wont last even though I have no reason to feel that way and put my FULL trust in her."}
{"id": "t3_3063hx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I (19 m) being too controlling of my gf (18 f)", "post": "Hey reddit friends. I need some help. \nSo there my (now ex) girlfriend moved into New highschool. She didn't move houses just schools. There was this boy that ended up befriending her on every social media. FB, Instagram, Twitter.  He began liking a lot of her pictures and she liked a few of his. I asked about him, and she said she didn't know him but was just returning the favor to be nice. I didn't think much of it. \n\nFast forward until about 2 days ago. I saw a text pop up on her phone, and it was the same guy. They weren't talking about cheating or anything, just hey what's up and stuff. So I talked to her about it and she ended up telling me that she actually did know him and and talked to him a few times. She told me she thought he was cute, and that he told her friend he liked my girlfriend. so I asked her to unfriend him on everything and she agreed. She did. \n\nToday I saw she again friended him again. I asked her ABout why she did that and she got extremely mad. I told her I was not okay with this given what she has told me and She said to me that \"I don't get to fucking decide what she does\". And then she called me an inconsiderate controlling asshole. I told her we wanted different things in a relationship. \n\nWas it wrong of me? Or was she just not caring about my feelings. Was communicating with this one guy so important that out whole relationship is over? Reddit help me. Was I in the wrong for being controlling? We were dating for 9 months. Was I right for calling off the relationship?", "summary": "idk if I am being too controlling of my gf, or is she is not caring about how I feel after lieing to me."}
{"id": "t3_2a6n3c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [18 F] of 2 months, her mother is not acting like a mother should.", "post": "Me and my girlfriend have been dating for 2 months now since the 4th, and the relationship between her and I is wonderful. We get along extremely well, and love each other very much. \n\n-\n\nShe has had a hard past, and even present. Her father left the family when she was young, and she hates every thought of him. Her mother had to support her two daughters for many years working many jobs, which led to not much one-on-one with her loved ones. All of my girlfriends life she has been scarred by past events and it has left her a very sensitive person which I completely respect.\n\n-\n\nHer mom remarried to a different man and they had 3 more children, so the total is 5 living in one household. Financially they are stable, but sometimes not everyone gets along and the love often feels distant for her (my girlfriend). \n\n-\n\nHer moms attitude towards her is usually very negative, and they even physically take it out on each other - her mother starting most of the trouble. She takes most of her anger out on my girlfriend which I am less than okay with. She shames her, hits her, and is the main cause of her mild depression. \n\n-\n\nOverall, the relationship between my girlfriend and her mother is growing distant and she is actually scared of her. Her mom puts her down on almost every occasion, and makes her feel like everything bad and terrible that has happened to her is her fault. I love my girlfriend to death and only want to see things get better for her.", "summary": "girlfriend is in hateful relationship with her mother, and can't even see her; only want to improve their relationship so we can move on and make my girl happier"}
{"id": "t3_egkbs", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Reddit, I need your help... I almost walked in on my live-in GF cheating...", "post": "Throw away account here. Im going to make as short as I can because I am too broken up to even sit at my computer right now, Its been a real rough night. So last night me and and my gf of 3 years who I live with decided to do our own thing. I was supposed to crash at a close friend of mines place for the night but decided against it last minute. I had tried texting and calling my gf during the course of the night to no avail. I wasn't very happy about this but just figured she was drunk with her girlfriends and that I would just catch her at the house. Well when I got home I walked up to my front door to see my girlfriend walking in the house with some dude I have never seen before. He splits when he sees me and me and my girlfriend fight all night over it. She can barely stand up or talk because she is so wasted and eventually passes out. So, I don't know what to do. Should I take her back? How do I handle this? We have been living together for 2 years and together for 3. Most of my life revolves around the relationship and Ive honestly always thought that I couldn't find a girl who would do as much as she does for me. She makes more money and pays most of the bills and yet doesn't look down on me for it. She has always been extremely supportive of me though everything and I feel like she loves me for me. I have severe anxiety and she has been there to hold my hand in the hospital through many panic attacks. Im closer to her than any person on the planet. This morning she woke up and is destroyed by what happened and is begging me to take her back. She says she was getting a ride home and was going to pass out but who knows. I don't know what to do but the trust is broken. So guys, if there is anyone I can rely on for advice it is you... Please help.", "summary": "caught my gf of 3 years who i live with bringing a guy home to our place when i was supposed to stay out. help."}
{"id": "t3_1815sz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [21M] and I [22F] keep having little fights over nothing, but there's nothing actually wrong in our relationship.", "post": "21M/22F So a little background. We've been dating for 8 months, but we've been friends for several years and we've never had problems. We still don't really. We get along super well, have lots in common, see our futures going the same way, and are overall madly in love. Lately though we've been having these weird little arguments over the dumbest things. They're not even really arguments because we don't get angry or yell or anything. We just bicker. I know everyone does this sometimes, but we've been doing it a lot lately and we're not sure why or how to stop it. Does anyone have advice for figuring out how to stop bickering in an otherwise loving, stable, and healthy relationship?", "summary": "Been dating for 8 months. We don't have problems or arguments, but we bicker a lot lately for seemingly no reason. Why?"}
{"id": "t3_4xta7n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26F] BF [28M] of a year lies about things", "post": "A lot of the time he is honest, but sometimes he just lies about things that in my mind he doesn't need to lie about. It worries me because the third big lie happened last week and its making me doubt how much I trust him. The 3 lies I know for sure are:\n\nMy BF was sleeping with someone before we got together, now that's none of my business because we were not together and I am 100% OK with that happening, but when I asked him about it he told me he had not slept with her. I later found out he had.\n\nWe got into an argument one time and I caught wind that he told one of his friends something that is quite personal to me. I asked him if he had done this and he said he hadn't. I later found out he had.\n\nHe's learning to play Tennis and goes to an indoor court with a female friend that he has known for a long time once a week. He went twice last week and said one time he went with one of his friends from work rather than that female friend. I later found out he had gone with her both times.\n\nWhy is he doing this? These are pointless lies that he doesn't realize I know he is lying about. It is really making me not trust him and I now wonder what other lies he has told or will carry on telling...", "summary": "Boyfriend lies about pointless things, after the third big lie I am now wondering why he is doing it and how I am ever going to trust him."}
{"id": "t3_4w9i88", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [25 F] learn to just let go?", "post": "So, last xmas an old woman knocked on my door saying she'd found some keys and didn't know what to do with them. I said I'd keep hold of them in case anyone claimed them. 6 months went by no one collected the keys so I threw them away.\n\nLast night my next door neighbour confronted me screaming that the keys were hers why didn't I give them back. She was absolutely vile. I was so stunned that I just apologised. She threw her hand up at me and turned her back. I walked into my house, shut the door, made dinner, carried on with my night.\n\nProblem is I'm bloody fuming. I'm so angry that I'm struggling to just let it go. I'm mad that I apologised, I didn't know they were her keys, I didn't do anything intentionally wrong or bad. \n\nI know I can't change her attitude I can only change mine. Having a go at her won't help, I need to ignore her and get on with my life.\n\nHow do I just drop it now and stop obsessing about \"should have\" and \"why didn't I\"? I've had barely any sleep and can't focus on getting on with my day. How do you calm down and move on?", "summary": "I'm still angry about a minor fall out with my neighbour. I don't know how to just let go and stop being so angry."}
{"id": "t3_3cxe0z", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[FL,USA] I signed a lease than 24 hours ago, how if at all can I break the lease?", "post": "Hello r/legaladvice, I'm moving to a new town for college in Florida and signed a lease yesterday for a room within a 4/4 Apartment in a larger apartment complex for students, through a private company/corporation.\n\nI was given the last available room within that floorplan but was refused disclosure of who my room mates are until after signing (dumb idea, I know). I was assured they were \"random people\" which is in fact not the case, it's a group of 3 people who know each other and come from a different culture, I already contacted them and it was made clear to me that they'd rather not have me there.  There are several other problems with the apartment/room that are now starting to show also, such as a lack of power outlets in the walk in closet (I was told I could put a fridge in there) and a few other things.\n\nI haven't taken possession of any keys yet and my lease doesn't officially start until August, all I really did was sign off on the lease, a few addenda and a guarantor form. What's my legal standing in this instance and is there a way I can break my lease? If need be I can pay some fines but there's no way I could pay off the whole lease or something to that extent. \n\nAny help appreciated!", "summary": "Just signed a lease 24 hours ago for an apartment, several verbal agreements have already been violated, I haven't taken possession of keys or anything else yet. What are my options in the state of Florida?"}
{"id": "t3_1o8fww", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, broke my friends mac, what do I do? More info inside ...", "post": "Ok I'm shitting a huge one. \n\nTwo days ago I took my pal a cup of tea, as he was working on our kitchen table.\n\nThe mug was wet, slipped from my hand, hit the table and splashed tea on his MacBook. \n\nImmediately I grabbed the laptop, turned the thing upside down (moisture away from electronics) and did a force power off. \n\nThen we cleaned up, he wiped off the mac, and said it would probably be fine - not to worry. He then powers the mac back on. Mac works.\n\nA few hours later he goes to plug in to the charger, and realises the battery won't charge. The power lead keeps the mac on and powered but won't charge the battery.\n\nSo now I'm really bricking it. He books into the 'genius' bar to get the thing looked at. Repair estimate - \u00a3570 (GBP.) Can't get it fixed elsewhere as this will void warranty.\n\nI am a student and have less than that in the bank to pay for rent etc, have a part time job which pays the bills. \n\nDo I lump up all the money? Does he have to take some responsibility ? He has no insurance. Any advice would be great, cause I'm not going to sleep until I have this sorted.", "summary": "got tea on mates MacBook, do I have to pay the whole repair (he has no insurance) and I feel really bad. Please help. :("}
{"id": "t3_40ux6l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Two sisters [19F/19F] are interested in me [21M] sexually. Not sure how to go about this.", "post": "I recently got out of a long term / long distance relationship and found these two girls have had a thing for me for quite some time. I am attracted to them and they both are attracted to me sexually. I've asked each individually and they want sex more than a relationship right now which works great for me, however I have no idea how to proceed. We're all in college as well. I've gotten to third base with both of them and nothing is awkward between us when we all hang out. I don't think they've told each other either.", "summary": "Two girls who are sisters are interested in me sexually (and vice versa) and I don't want to ruin the friendships between us. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_n34tf", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "How to ReStart a Relationship", "post": "not sure if reddit will be particularly interested in my story here... \nI'm a 19yr old [M] and just broke it off with my girlfriend after 13 months. I, a few weeks later, want to try and restart said relationship.\n\nThe reason I decided to break it off was that she was unhappy despite the fact that our relationship was great in and of itself. She felt neglected and lonely when I would hang out with my friends (male and female) or seem to enjoy myself without even when she couldn't be there. She has friends, but not to the same capacity that I do and didn't always feel like hanging out with me and my friends. \n\nEssentially, I broke it off because I couldn't resolve this dynamic in our relationship that seemed to be getting more and more unhealthy. The thing is, I would very much like to get back together with her and I think she feels the same way despite it not ending on very good terms.", "summary": "I ended my relationship because my GF felt neglected when i was with my friends despite us having a very good relationship otherwise."}
{"id": "t3_143g0e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "M(26) head over heels for F(26), but she is blowing hot and cold. Advice on What to do", "post": "So it goes like this. I'm in love with this girl. We work at the same Office. We share an amazing chemistry. I've told her about my feelings. But she is indecisive about it. She just got out of a relationship before 6 months. \n\nWhen I'm with her, she seems like she doesn't value my company. I'm there for her because she definitely needs someone to hold her together. I know this because i have seen the difference in handling of her problems with and without my presence. \n\nWhen i'm not with her, she would be like calling, texting and telling me she is thinking about me. And when we meet later, She is like too much close to me. \n \nI feel like she is using me(Unintentionally) to get her Ego Boost. I know this because I make her feel like a Queen, say the most amazing things about her. \n\nI want to continue being friends with her and whenever i start to move away slowly from her, she comes that much closer to me. I have other awesome women in my life whom i've been ignoring lately because of this woman, with the intention of a good friend, but \"scumbag heart\" doesn't let me be and I go back to my **\"Feelings\"** for her again. \n\nDon't really know what i'm doing. Would really appreciate if some one would provide a perspective on this. Ladies, I would like your perspective as well.", "summary": "M(26) had feelings for F(26). She is indecisive. So continuing as friends as she needs me. But if i go too far, she wants to"}
{"id": "t3_1u4vm6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18/f] boyfriend [24/m] is a magician. He did the \"kiss trick\" on another girl.", "post": "I have been with my boyfriend for almost a full year now. We are so incredibly close and have spent nearly every single day together. I have never been so close with someone, even past people I was in love with. \n\nAnyway, he has a pretty cool job - he is self employed, and does magic for weddings and restaurants and corporate events - classy, adult close up magic. None of that bunny in the hat stuff. He is young and very very cute, tall, and gets a lot of girls giggling and winking at him, which I understood when entering the relationship was part of the deal.\n\nHe used to do this trick, which he once did on me when we first met, called the kiss trick. Where he pretty much puts a card in his mouth and another card in a girls mouth, they kiss, and then the cards are switched. He's asked, and I've told him, this is not okay with me. He can flirt for tips all he wants but kissing crosses the line. He has plenty of other tricks. Hundred of them. He agreed. However, a week ago he was doing a wedding and ended up going a kiss trick on a bridesmaid who asked him to, who had seen the trick done by another magician before. He told me and was honest but I can't help feel betrayed and upset. We agreed on this from the start :/ I love him and have no desire to leave him but want to handle this in a way that shows how serious I am. Please help.", "summary": "magician boyfriend kissed another girl as part of his act when we both agreed he would not do this. Unsure of how to act. "}
{"id": "t3_1ce7da", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Even though our relationship is doomed, I don't want to break up with my boyfriend [m/21] because of how happy he makes me when we're together. Is this crazy? [f/21]", "post": "Is it crazy that I'm thinking of staying with my boyfriend, simply because of how much fun we have together. I have no problem being single, and I have tones of other friends, but nothing compares to the stupid/crazy/weird sense of humor we share, and the things we do. \n\nHe lied to me a couple times, and I can no longer trust him. I still love him completely, but I think we have to break up. But I dont want to lose him as a friend. although if we remain friends, I know we're going to fall back into the same relationship, just by being together. So is it completely insane to think I can keep this relationship going, just because we have so much fun together, even though we both know its going to end eventually?  \n\n(I know he'd be okay with it. he claims to be completely in love with me, and even though I've told him we're breaking up in 3 weeks, he is still sticking around because 'he wants to spend as much time with me as he can before its over')", "summary": "has anyone ever stayed in a relationship you knew was doomed, for the sole purpose of just enjoying your SO's company so much?"}
{"id": "t3_fkqf1", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Just Bought A Garmin Forerunner 305 For What I Think Is A Decent Deal. Thought I'd Share.", "post": "So I did some looking around at different models of wrist mount GPS units. Cost and functionality were the biggest concern. I finally decided on the Forerunner 305 since it would do everything I wanted and was a good price (even though it's huge).\n\nBest price I found online was through Amazon for around $130, with free shipping if I wanted to wait 1-2 weeks. It was available at the local Best Buy for $150. Did a quick search and found a printable coupon good for the month of February at Best Buy for 20% off all \"Health & Fitness\" products.\n\nWent in to Best Buy and the price was $160 on the shelf. I found an employee (just happened to be a cute girl) nearby and told her I wanted to get the 305. She said she had that model and loved it...even more than some of the more expensive ones she tried (even though it's huge). She said she has run some marathons and we chatted a little bit about how I was just starting to run. She told me about some of the runs in the area, how the best ones tend to end with beer, and overall was very pleasant and informative while waiting in line at the cashier. I definitely hope to meet more cool people like her while pursuing this sport.\n\nSo I got to the cashier and the 305 rang up at $160 as expected. I mentioned the web site price was $150 and he price matched it. Then I gave him the 20% off coupon and it wouldn't scan. He tried typing in the number and it wouldn't take it. So he tried again and it accepted the coupon, but didn't apply the discount to the 305. He read the coupon, looked at the GPS, manually entered the 20% off and had a supervisor approve it. Super easy, out the door for $120.\n\nThe coupon should work on any \"Garmin Fitness GPS\" (that's an actual category on the Best Buy website), as well as any heart rate monitor or other brand of fitness GPS.\n\nHere's a link to the coupon. Hopefully it will be useful for someone out there within the next couple weeks. It expires on 2/28/2011.", "summary": "20% off Best Buy coupon got me a Garmin Forerunner 305 for $120. Coupon should work for anything \"Health & Fitness.\""}
{"id": "t3_259rfh", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[20M/24F] Kind of a pathetic question, but calling/texting after getting a girl's number", "post": "So, I've had girlfriends before, but never met a girl that I didn't already know from school or work. I'm kinda lost.\n\nAnyway; I got a cute girl's number last Wednesday. She seemed either a little shy or a little pressured (even though I just asked \"would you like to meet up sometime?\"), said she worked often and very late, I said I do the same, which is true. I actually work later nights and also very often, so I kind of need to be up on scheduling stuff with people ahead of time. Anyway, she said yes and I got her number.\n\nThat said, girls don't really seem to like scheduling too far ahead - I'm guessing it kills any feelings of spontaneity (sp?)... So I texted her Friday, asking if she wanted to meet up Sunday (today) because people never pick up when you call them these days. No response. It's not like a lot of time has passed, but still, 2 days is plenty of time to type out a text.\n\nI'm kinda thinking I could call her (can get a straighter response, and I prefer it to texting anyway) this afternoon. But I don't want to ruin anything by calling, either. I'm not afraid of rejection, but I hate not knowing.\n\nWhere I live, it's also common to not have a plan for your phone, so instead you'd fill it with a bit of money and use that up. She might not have any money on her phone, and thus can't reply. Probably wishful thinking...\n\nIs she just not interested? Think I might as well give her a call? My gut feeling is saying that if she's interested it doesn't actually matter that much what I do, but I don't want to make a big faux pas already. Unless I already have.\n\nI'm probably overthinking this. I know getting a number isn't a huge accomplishment, perhaps this girl never even wanted to see me at all, so it feels kinda off asking this question in \"dating advice\". But some general ground rules, if nothing else, would be really helpful.", "summary": "got number Wednesday, texted Friday about meeting up Sunday, no response as of yet, could I just as well try and give her a call or should I just give up?"}
{"id": "t3_21y3r9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M20] want to go on a trip with my girlfriend [F19] for 3-5 days once we get out of school. I have 250-300 dollars to spend, and I want it to be perfect. Tips?", "post": "Hey guys! So I've been dating this wonderful girl for a while now; we both go to college together. The semester ends on May 16th. However, she is transferring in the fall and we both start summer courses on the 21st at different schools, so I want to treat her to something really special before we start that business.\n\nWe currently go to school in Ulster County, NY.\n\nShe's really into the outdoors and music. I wanted to take her to a music festival, but thats just a bit too rich for my blood. It would be cool to take her hiking/camping somewhere, or do something similar, and maybe a show somewhere in there. But I'm just testing the waters to see exactly what $250-$300 can get me, because I'm sure travel expenses/camping won't cost that much, especially if I'm going somewhere in the tri-state area.\n\nI know that this is incredibly generic, but if there any other suggestions of what to do with the remaining money, that would be much appreciated!", "summary": "Have $250-$300, want to spend it on a mini-vacation for my Girlfriend. Any tips?"}
{"id": "t3_y3h95", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Girlfriend broke up with me so I rebounded...now the rebound girl won't leave me alone.", "post": "Here's the deal, I slept with this girl and we ended up hanging out a lot afterwards. The entire time I made it very clear that I was not looking for a relationship (and by that I mean I said those words to her multiple times.). Anyway, I started to lose interest so we weren't talking as much as we were before. One week later after no communication she calls me up crying/bitching about why I don't like her. So naturally I'm all like dafuq bitch?, but here is where it gets even crazier. She starts randomly texting me about how she thinks I'm angry and abusive towards her. I have never done a mean or abusive thing to a woman period. Also I feel like since I was honest with our relationship she has pretty much no right to be so angry with me...also she has been telling her friends I'm her boyfriend...WTF! Any tips on how to get rid of this person?", "summary": "Rebounded with a girl she made false accusations about how I treated her and now tells her friends that we are a couple help me get rid of this shitty shitty person."}
{"id": "t3_18tffu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend [25M] is married, but can't get over feelings for me [22F].", "post": "I  (22f) was briefly enrolled in a graduate program this fall, and am still in close contact with a lot of friends I made while I was there.  One of these friends is a 25 year old guy from China.  \n\nBecause English was not his first language and I could tell he was a little isolated, I was careful to be nice and invite him to events.  We started hanging out some on our own, but mostly just to discuss school/world politics; nothing too personal.  He asked me out a few times this fall, and even though I assumed he was single, I turned him down nicely-- just wasn't interested.\n\nAfter the final time I turned him down he got a little clingy and weird, so I tried to create some space between us; I didn't really speak to him over Christmas break.\n\nImagine my surprise when my presumably single friend comes home from China married after Christmas!  Turns out he'd had a girlfriend all along and they tied the knot while he was there.  I assumed that settled things, and went back to occasionally spending time with him.\n\nLast night, he admitted to me that he's jealous of the guy I've been dating and has feelings for me.  I sort of just apologized and ignored it, but now I'm frustrated and not sure what to do.  Normally, I would just cut things off with him since he doesn't seem to be able to have \"just friends\" feelings toward me.  In this case, though, I feel guilty, since he really doesn't have many friends and seems to put a lot of energy into maintaining contact with me.   So what should I do?  Just end things?  Pretend it never happened?  All I know is that I certainly wouldn't want MY husband spending time alone with a woman he had feelings for.  I don't want to cross any lines.", "summary": "Married friend isn't over me.  Do I cut off all contact, or keep hanging out with him since I don't think he has many friends?"}
{"id": "t3_2l0nqp", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Every time the scale goes up...", "post": "It is so disheartening to be trying to lose weight and see the scale go up. Sometimes it goes up several days in a row and there you are, first thing in the morning, sleepy and naked and standing on the scale thinking, \"What the actual fuck?\"\n\nThen you try to shake it off and you start the water running for a shower and you tell yourself, 'It's okay, it's just a temporary rise, I will keep trying.' And then you go on about your day, LIKE THE GODDAMN WEIGHT LOSS HERO THAT YOU ARE. \n\nTo track my weight loss over the last 4 months I made a graph in a spreadsheet program. It's not a straight line down, it's actually peaks and valleys. The *general* trend is down (28lbs today - holla!) but what I've noticed is that every time the \"whoosh fairy\" visits me and gives me a nice chunk of weight loss, she takes back some of it over the next week. Then she gives me just a *bit* more - enough to keep the graph going down. Thank you, Whoosh Fairy. I love you.\n\nI've noticed this time and time again so I keep trying, even when the scale goes up despite my best efforts (and even when it goes up after my *worst* efforts).", "summary": "keep trying. It's not a sprint, it's a lifetime marathon. Keep chugging along all you heroes out there."}
{"id": "t3_24z15x", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Ramon?", "post": "I changed my cell phone number at the beginning of this year because of personal reasons. Unfortunately, the new number came with some baggage.\n\nEvery few days, the same person would call and ask for a Ramon in Spanglish. Having taken 7 years of Spanish, I've patiently explained to him numerous times in both English and Spanish that this is no longer Ramon's number and that I'd like time to stop calling. \n\nAfter the 11th time of 'ello? Donde es Ramon?' I promptly hangup and wait for the next call. Sure enough, a few minutes later, I get another call from the same person and I answer in Korean. \n\nIt's important to note that I have absolutely no how to speak Korean except for what my friends have taught me.\n\n'Annyeonghaseyo?'\n'Donde esta Ramon? Ramon?'\n'Kimchee saranhaeyo. Oppa Oppa na!'\n'I want to uh speak with uh Ramon. I know he is there.'\n\nAt this point, I've exhausted my Korean knowledge, so I turn to my extensive anime background.\n\n'Dattebayo! Konbanwa minnasan! Suzuki Honda kage bunshin no justsu!'\n\nI begin spewing out the lyrics to Just be Friends until I hear a muddled apology and the phone clicks.\n\nI haven't received a phonecall looking for Ramon ever since.", "summary": "Changed my number and someone keeps calling for Ramon. I get sick of it and answer in Korean and Weeaboo until they give up."}
{"id": "t3_44e7xd", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By tickling", "post": "So the fuckup was yesterday, had my friend over lying around watching movies and YouTube. Being playful I tickle her and try to make her laugh and giggle. She wriggles and moves her knees up to her chest, in a sort of fetal position on her back. While she does this out of no where a silver metallic object falls down and hits her  square in the face. The silver object was a Mac book Air delicately balancing  she sticks her finger in her mouth. I ask if she is alright, with a slight smirk on my face and ask her to open her mouth and show me but she won't. Eventually after a long while standing by her side at a mirror in the bathroom she shows me a tiny little chip at the bottom of her front right tooth. She is tearing up abit but handles it well and asks if I can take her home because it hurts.", "summary": "Chipped the tooth of my friend using a Macbook Air while trying to make her happy and realized how much of a bad I am a for smirking."}
{"id": "t3_179cxa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Been dating him [25m] for 7 months. Now he cut off all communication with me [20f]. What do I do?", "post": "I'll make this short. He and I have been dating for 7 months, and I am absolutely in love with him. He moved 5 hours away about a month into our relationship, but I had been driving to see him every few weeks. We had been discussing moving in together next year (2014, because I like to plan ahead). We've had some problems, but nothing that would indicate that this was going to happen.\n\nOn Monday, he texted me asking if I knew how wonderful I was, how much he loved me, etc. On Tuesday he and I were talking and texting before I went into work. When I got off work, I was blocked on facebook, skype, and he wasn't answering my calls.\n\nI finally texted him saying that he has my pets (which he does, because he volunteered to watch them for me) and he said that he needed time and that he would watch them until someone came to get them. \n\nSo, am I dumped? It feels like it, but I really don't know if it's just time apart or not. I also don't know if I want him back if he's going to pull this kind of act, but I love him and it hurts. I kept asking him if he was breaking up with me, and received no response.", "summary": "Boyfriend and I live apart. Were texting one morning and it was fine, that afternoon he blocked me. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_jtxy3", "subreddit": "self", "title": "My best friend, and beer may have saved my family's lifes last night.", "post": "Yeah, so I missed a call from him earlier. When I called back he said he'd call me back in a bit. So I'm farting around, looking for something to do. Watched TV in the basement for a short time and went back upstairs. I was chilling in my bed, messing with my phone when he called. He asked if he could run something by me and I asked if it was beer because I was out of beer. We decided that I'd just go over to his house so I could drink his beer and he could run something by me. When I went outside, I smelled something burning. Not just *something* burning, but it smelled like cigarette butts burning. I had recently smoked a cigarette on the back porch and outside the basement door, so I went to check. Nothing happening on the back porch, but there was a softball size glowing red wad of cigarette butts where I put my cigarette out about 10-15 minutes earlier. I realize now how unsafe our \"ash tray\" is now because it is just a flimsy plastic thing that a plant would come in, it was over stuffed with cigarette butts AND it was sitting in a bed of pine straw! So I grab the hose and easily extinguish this glowing butt fireball of death and breathe a sigh of relief.\n\nSo who knows what would have happened if I hadn't decided to go to my friends house at about that time. I would've come outside within the next half hour or so to smoke, an hour at the most and would have smelled it then if it was still smoldering. But like I said, it was a glowing ball of death in a bed of pine straw, so it could have easily ignited and then who knows what would have happened.\n\nOh, and my wife is out of town. Imagine making that call. Honey, umm, I uh, I burned the house down. *shiver* Can't even think about the fact that all 4 of my kids were home at this time.\n\nI will absolutely get a can of some sorts to put our butts in to reduce the risk. Should just fucking quit smoking.\n\nThanks dude. Oh, he was contemplating refininancing his house and wanted to discuss it with me.", "summary": "Out of beer, friend calls at just the right time, I smell smoke outside, house was about to catch fire."}
{"id": "t3_1i4po1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I need advice on how to advance this...", "post": "So, a little back story for all of you. \n\nI met this girl [16] (I'm 17 Male) about 3 1/2 or 4 weeks ago and it was a really casual thing to start out with. She was only a friend of a friend to me at first so I was like, \"Oh okay, she's just gonna chill with me and my other 2 friends.\" so I thought nothing of it but she was pretty chill so we talked a good while while just skating around town, getting coffee, and then going back to my place to just relax and listen to music.\n\nI started to like her more and more as the day went on because she's a very talented musician, very laidback, skates, and ADORES animals. She's perfect.\n\nWell, fast forward to now, we've hung out alot since then, gone to a concert, the mall, and hung out almost all week in a couple cases, and we're still just pretty close friends. \n\nI'm not too worried at the moment because we talk alot and always skate together and such but I'm just wondering, how do I advance this without overstepping my boundaries? She's had bad experiences with relationships in the past so I've been very careful to not do anything that'd upset her. \n\nAnd no friends, I'm not stuck in the friendzone, I've been made aware from her friend that she's interested in me as well, she's just shy and careful around people she likes.\n\nI would have totally taken her out for dinner already, but the only thing is that I'm currently unemployed...\n\nSO, my question to all of you lads and lasses out there is: How do I advance our relationship without making her feel uncomfortable? \n\nThank you in advance all of you. <3", "summary": "I met this girl a few weeks back, she's the fucking bees knees, she's had bad experiences with previous relationships, how do I advance our relationship without making her feel uncomfortable?"}
{"id": "t3_54hx4r", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Don't even know where to start -- very overwhelmed.", "post": "Making a one-off account, for some \"privacy\". \n\nSo I've been lurking on this sub for a while, and there has been a lot of great advice, including on the sidebar. My problem basically is -- I don't even know where to start. I know that we (my wife and I) aren't doing a good job managing money, and we've been \"trying\" to fix it for a while, but both aren't very good at this. With a little one on the way, it's really time for us to get on track.\n\nSo I've tried Mint, YNAB (can never get it working right so that I can actually use it successfully), and spreadsheets. I'm most comfortable with the spreadsheet, at least for now. It'll really be on me to manage, as my wife isn't very tech or financially savvy, but ultimately would love a way for her to access & manage. That's later...\n\nSo -- I know my income and the fixed expenses (rent, insurance, etc.). What I struggle with when creating a budget is the variable costs such as my wife's income (she's full-time, but paid hourly and paychecks vary depending on holidays, sick time, etc.), gas/electric (which changes pretty dramatically month-to-month), etc.\n\nWhat about factoring in things like doctors (co-pays, etc.), prescriptions, etc. that also happen every month. I also have some ESPP, 401K, credit card debt (for the first time ever, due to multiple unexpected things happening at once... long story, doesn't matter),  Student loans, etc. One problem is that I think the money is too \"spread out\" over multiple accounts.\n\nI'm thinking that one of the incomes could cover most of the expenses, and the other can cover leftover debt & savings, but would like to account for every dollar to make sure that is happening/can happen.\n\nI'll need to make another post once I get all this sorted out, but where is the best place to start? If I can at least get some of the basics down that would be great.", "summary": "My wife and I are overwhelmed with budgeting, especially with a baby on the way. Need help getting started sorting things out."}
{"id": "t3_1ut0n0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO [24 M] has an old friend that I [23 F] am not comfortable with. Need advice.", "post": "I'll try to keep this short and sweet. My SO was \"best friends\" with this girl in college, but he was also in love with her at the time. The reason why they didn't work out is because \"she didn't want it.\" She came to visit him a few years ago when we were dating for about 6 months at the time and things went down that made us go through a really rough time for our relationship (he didn't cheat, he just treated me like crap and she was kind of a bitch to me). It's been 2 years since then and things have been better than ever, yet when I hear her name, I become filled with anger. I thought they stopped speaking because I haven't heard about her in a while and I hear about all of his other friends but I found out last night that they have. I asked to see a couple of messages, and all of them were along the lines of, \"you are so amazing!\" and \"omg I love you!\" I can't tell him to stop talking to her because she was his best friend, but how can I help myself not be so angry and be okay with this? If you need more information let me know, I didn't want to write too much BS.", "summary": "Bf is talking to his old girl best friend again which I am not comfortable with due to a sticky past situation."}
{"id": "t3_4v9h2h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27f] want my boyfriend [26m] of almost 2 years to say \"I love you\" first.", "post": "My boyfriend was very shy when we met but slowly has bloomed into someone even more social than me. Watching him find his confidence has been an incredible turn on for me. \n\nLately I've felt like he's wanted to tell me he loves me. He initiates long conversations that end with awkward pauses while he looks into my eyes etc. So far he hasn't really worked up the nerve but he's been saying things like \"I love... about you\". I've been finding opportunities to reciprocate those sentiments by saying things like \"I love when you...\" and such. He made me a playlist where the majority of songs very heavily talk of loving someone.", "summary": "Should I let him off the hook and say it first? Is it ok to hold out because I really relish the thought of him having the confidence to say it to me first? Is there something I can do to encourage him?"}
{"id": "t3_4c1alr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 F] with my SO [28 M] five years, he shared a bed with another girl every weekend for around 6 months, with me in the next room.;text=. **tl;dr**: After he spent six months sharing a bed with someone else, but having sex with me, should I move to Canada with him?", "post": "My SO [M 29] shared a bed with another girl every weekend for around 6 months, with me in the next room.\n\nIt started about December. One day he went on a night out and didn't come back. I found out later he had been playing video games with a girl all night. She was bi and had had a long term girlfriend so I didn't think too much of it. \n\nThen I went home for Christmas and when I came back she was there, in the flat we had bought together, and it was obvious she had stayed over. I felt bad for leaving him over Christmas so just left it. But the seal was broken. \n\nNot long after that she started coming over every Friday and Saturday night with her", "summary": "After he spent six months sharing a bed with someone else, sometimes referring to me as his flatmate, but having sex with me, should I move to Canada with him?"}
{"id": "t3_1mdt5t", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I left my sister in South Korea with no one", "post": "I was in South Korea for two months this summer, studying abroad. I chose to go there partly because my older sister happens to live in South Korea as an elementary school English teacher and I wanted to visit her. Saved up for a year to scrape up enough money to pay for half of it (scholarships covered the other half).\n\nI stayed with my sister for about one month of it. I understood that we'd both changed during the long time we didn't see each other so I shrugged off various things that would have bothered me otherwise, and we had a great time hanging out together and catching up and having fun. Anyway fast-forward to today when I've been back in the states for a month and she just messaged me saying that she got into a toxic relationship a few days after I left, cropped up with a host of health problems, and just found out that she has a stress-induced hernia (whatever that may be), and part of the reason is that she couldn't handle me leaving. \n\nAs soon as she told me all this, she tried to blow it off and make light of it, especially about the relationship she's in (what details she did tell made me really uneasy). On top of that she decided to re-sign her teaching contract and stay for at least another year. I know I'm responsible for part of this situation (especially since I gave her the idea to teach in South Korea in the first place) and I could have done more to help her out but at the time I had no idea that she had counted so much on my being around. She's four years older than me and we didn't even become friends until recently. I always looked up to her because she was always taller/more beautiful/more mature than me and I was so busy being excited that she was treating me like an equal to see that she was having a lot of other problems.\n\nI keep catching myself planning to go back to Korea as soon as I can just to try to help her out. But I can't go, because I'm in the thick of my senior year in university, I have no money anymore for travel, and I can hardly think straight myself because of school expectations.", "summary": "I'm worried out of my mind about my older sister because she's self-destructing and she's alone in Korea with no family and few friends, and I feel responsible."}
{"id": "t3_11wlmg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "This might sound horribly ignorant or stupid, but I was wondering about normal interaction with Muslim women.", "post": "I am a pretty friendly and outgoing guy, but I am confused about something. I usually smile at people and say hi cordially (even strangers), but when I see Muslim women in headscarves, I am worried that they will take offense to me smiling and looking them in the eye. So in the end, if I accidentally make eye contact, I quickly look away so I don't feel like I am offending them, but that seems even more rude.\n\nI am in the US, and my heritage is East Indian (Hindu). I live in AZ and women with headscarves probably already have such a hard time with discrimination in this state. I just want to do what is right. With my Indian background, I look similar to Muslims, and I am worried that that may create even more offense, as if I am leering or something when I am really just a nice guy.\n\nMy fiancee and I were at the mall yesterday, and it came up. I smiled and said hi to the women behind us in line, and they looked a little taken aback. Did I fuck up?", "summary": "Is it rude or offensive for a male to smile and say hi to a woman in a headscarf, or is it okay to act cordially like I would with any stranger?"}
{"id": "t3_va9x8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Does anyone have experience with cell phone repair companies?", "post": "Yesterday, I accidentally dropped my Motorola Atrix 2 and the screen cracked really badly. My phone is still fully functional, but it's a bit difficult to see what I'm doing when I'm texting or web browsing, etc. \n\nAnyway, I stupidly didn't buy insurance for my phone and I'm not eligible for an upgrade until next May! AT&T offers some options as far as getting a no-commitment phone at a slight discount, but spending $300-$600 for a new phone isn't really in the budget right now. I know when you start a new contract, AT&T offers their phones at a fraction of the price (i.e., $100 for a $500 phone) so would I be able to take advantage of that? It seems like I wouldn't, but I'm a little confused with how their policy works that way! I was thinking of visiting my local store.\n\nSo I was looking at [Motorola's repair center] and they said they won't repair phones that have been physically abused - so that means dropped, submerged in water, ran over, exposed to heat, etc. \n\nI found a couple websites that will repair your phone if you send it in. [Doctor Quick Fix] will do it for $110 and I'm still waiting on a quote from [CPR](\n\nSo my question is, have any of you used this company, or know anyone who has used it? Should I trust these companies? Do you have any recommendations? What should I do to get my phone fixed?", "summary": "I dropped my phone, cracking the screen. I can't afford to buy a full price phone, so should I try the above repair companies? What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2d7q17", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Why do I [23M] feel so bad hearing about how well and happy my ex [23F] is, when she was the one who cheated?", "post": "Hey guys, so I've posted on here a few times about my ex so I'm sure you can easily find it in the post history if you really want to know the context of it all and how we broke up.\n\nLong story short, she's still with the 18 year old that she cheated on me with and I regularly hear from mutual friends about how happy she is and how she says that he is the \"true one for her\" and that shes never been happier in her life. I feel absolutely awful hearing how great she is doing and progressing because I guess there is a selfish part of me that wants her to be in a much worse situation than I am in for what she did. We were together for 3 years and speaking of marriage, which was entirely her idea to begin with.\n\nShe and I have been officially broken up for about 7 months. I understand that everybody wants to be the one who does well after a harsh break-up but I feel like my life, despite going to the gym and trying to get out more and be social after all this time, is seemingly going nowhere with no love aspects on the horizon. While she, the cheater, is out living life to the fullest with her new boyfriend.\n\nI feel the majority of me is over her. I no longer have longings and wishes of being back together or reminisce the happier days with her. There are no romantic feelings towards her anymore which in itself has been a huge step forward for me. However, I just don't like that the person who did all this and ruined everything and crushed me so horribly with a terrible act seems to be so much happier than I am. In truth, despite getting over her romantically, I still don't think I'm anywhere near happy like I used to be.\n\nIt's late and I suppose I just needed to get this off of my chest as it has been bothering me for awhile. Maybe some other people who have been in the same or a similar situation can tell me what they did to overcome these feelings", "summary": "Having terrible feelings knowing that my ex, who cheated and ruined the relationship, is much happier now and seems to be living a much more positive life than I am."}
{"id": "t3_tz6xo", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "When is it okay to attack your significant other?", "post": "Hi Reddit, this is my first post on AskReddit. Recently, my brother's girlfriend and I was listening and eventually talking about the Rihanna song featuring Chris Brown on the radio (I think it was called birthday cake). Anyways, I was still shocked about Rihanna getting back together with CB after what happened. I said that Rihanna should have never gotten back with CB after what he's done. My brother's girlfriend said otherwise and stated that \"it was love.\" I have never been in a relationship so I'm not in a favourable position to argue. So Reddit, under what circumstances (other than the circumstance of self defence) are you deemed socially just when you physically attack your significant other?", "summary": "Me and bro's girlfriend argued about Chris Brown and Rihanna getting back together. Bro's girlfriend said it was okay due to being love. When do you think it is okay to attack your significant other?"}
{"id": "t3_1b15gq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How to make my [F,20] relationship with my boyfriend [M, 20] more exciting again.", "post": "I [f,20]  have been with my boyfriend [m,20] for over 2 years now, and at the beginning of this year, I moved hours away for college. The distance has been a struggle. Communication is the hardest thing. Our work/study times cross over so if we do have time to talk in the day, its very brief. \nWe are very comfortable with each other, so with that we are used to what we have in this relationship. There doesnt seem to be the excitement anymore, and it is very hard to maintain that while in a LDR. \nLately, we have been getting really short with each other and end up arguing over the stupidest, most minimal things. \nThere may be a chance for me to transfer my course somewhere that isnt so far from his town, and we may be able to see each other more often. \nI am seeing him for a week from tomorrow, and I really want to do my part in making the relationship more fun, flirty and exciting but dont really know where to start or how to do that? \nI dont want to give up just saying the relationship is 'boring' if I/we havent done anything to try fix that.. \n\n**bold", "summary": "relationship not exciting anymore. Wanting to bring fun and flirtiness back into the relationship, rather than just giving up."}
{"id": "t3_352brp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [21F] make my coworker [22M] feel comfortable talking to me again?", "post": "Last night I went out bar crawling with several of my coworkers. One of them, Harry, got heavily drunk so I offered him my couch to pass out on because it was just a short walk away. He happily accepted, but I told him that first I need to just double check that it was okay with my roommates and my significant other. He immediately said, \"oh you have a boyfriend?\" and stormed away.\n\nAn hour later I got this text:\n\n\" It would be for the best if we didn't speak again. I'm sorry for being the asshole that I am. I did a lot of stupid things tonight, and I'm still in the process of doing something stupid. I'm so sorry for putting you in any kind of awkward position, you don't deserve that. I figure I should say all this before I get too sober and clam up.\"\n\nNow I understand that he probably had a crush on me and was upset to find out that I have a boyfriend, but I did not lead him on in anyway before this. I also realize that this was blown out of proportion for him because of how much alcohol he had. \n\nHow do I respond to his text in a way that let's him know that it was okay to have a bad drunk night and that I don't think any less of him for it? I'm at a loss how to do this since I know about his crush. I have to continue working with him so it would be awkward if I can't resolve this.", "summary": "my coworker got drunk and freaked out when he found out I have a SO. I want to let him know he doesn't need to be embarrassed."}
{"id": "t3_49mtji", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to have a serious talk with an SO?", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nMy SO [25F] and I [30M] are great about 95% of the time. Sometimes she does little things that bug me and I'll let her know that they bug me on the spot and she'll recognize what she did, apologize, and correct her actions. She's just as communicative with me when I annoy her with my stupid antics and I'll apologize and correct whatever it is that needed correcting.\n\nHowever, the bigger issues like money, marriage, sex and overall feelings tend to be \"sit down\" conversations. When she brings up an important issue, I listen intently, take a moment to process and build a proper response then tell her how I feel and together we come up with a course of action. \n\nOn the opposite side of the table, if I bring up an issue with her she completely shuts down. She doesn't speak, doesn't look at me, nothing. I think she's doing everything she can to hold tears back. I've told myself that I'd write a letter in the future expressing everything I felt but the conversations aren't exactly planned. I've even tried to wait it out and we both sat there for *10 minutes* in silence. Not joking. Literally 10 minutes because I told myself after 10 minutes I'd say something.\n\nWe've never yelled at each other and I love her dearly. I'm hoping there's a method or some kind of way that she'd be much more reciprocating during an important conversation. I certainly don't want to have an important conversation about how she's non-responsive during important conversations.", "summary": "My SO shuts down when I bring up an important issue. Need help coaxing a response or a technique that will allow her to speak more comfortably."}
{"id": "t3_1aj58k", "subreddit": "books", "title": "Help me pick books for my mom.", "post": "I apologize for the wall of text, but I want to be thorough with this.\n\nMy mom is 56, retired last summer, and kind of lapsing in the intellectual department. She's got nothing to do that occupies her time aside from watching TV. She's been doing more reading lately, even had me pick her up a booklight so should could read while my dad is asleep, but she's reading stuff that's clearly not intellectually challenging. She bought ~10 Debbie Macomber books at a garage sale and has been consuming then nonstop. She expressed some interest to me in reading something that's less fluffy, but I'm kind of at a loss on what to get her. \n\nI work in a bookstore, so you'd think that I'd be good at making these kinds of suggestions, and I've been trying with her. I tend to pick standard book club fodder, *The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society* was a book that she claimed to like, but there are other things I've picked up for her that she hasn't seemed interested in. \n\nShe also doesn't want anything \"dark.\" She's constantly complaining about the media that my father and I consume being too dark, too creepy, too violent, too sad, so on and so on. She doesn't seem to want anything that is too deep on the emotional scale, so I don't know what to do. I tend to feel like a book is really great when it rips my heart into a million pieces and puts it back together again in a different shape. I don't think my mom wants that. \n\nI'd like to get her a series, I've been thinking about *The No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency* by Alexander McCall Smith, but I'm not sure. I haven't read them, so what with them being mysteries rather than romance, I'm afraid she'll think they're \"too dark\" all over again. She's voiced interest in some \"good nonfiction\" but I'm not sure where to go with that either, since reality is often darker than fiction.\n\nThanks in advance.", "summary": "Reading material for my middle-aged, retired mom. Preferably a series. \"Not dark\" but still intellectually stimulating. She's been reading fluffy romance, but I'd like to help her branch out."}
{"id": "t3_1g1knv", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Question about Wells Fargo Private Loans", "post": "Hey everyone, I recently graduated with my Bachelor's degree in Nursing from a private, 4 year college. I had to take out the Government loans as well as private loans. I have a question about my private loans. As you can see here,  this shows my principal balances, interest rates, and current interest accumulated. \n\n The 13.250% loan has a fixed interest rate, the others are variable. I would really like to pay off both my private and government loans as soon as possible, and I am trying to figure out the best way to do it.\n\n I am a little confused over the wording of the paperwork I have on them. For the loan I took out in 2009, the wording about prepayment is \"Prepayment will not result in a penalty. If you choose to pre-pay, you will not be entitled to a refund of any loan origination fees or any finance charges accrued through the date of repayment\" Does this mean, if I were to pay it off, I would only need to pay the current interest and the principal balance? The paperwork says that I would end up paying around $19,344 if I pay it over the 15 years, but if I pay it off sooner, I would pay less?\n\nThe other 3 loans have different wording. \"If you pay off your loan early, you will not have to pay a penalty. You will not be entitled to a refund of part of the finance charge\". To me, that seems like, even if you pay it off earlier, you would still need to pay all of the interest that would have accumulated over 15 years. Are my thoughts correct? \n\nAlso, considering all this information, how should I go about paying back my loans? I have $27,000 in government loans, + interest, plus these private loans.", "summary": "confused about the wording of my private loans, and want some help figuring out how to pay back my government and private loans."}
{"id": "t3_1qerzg", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "What can you tell me about my cat?", "post": "We adopted a stray kitten that my sister found in the local Taco Bell parking lot. After watching for missing signs and seeing nothing, we decided to keep him. Great, cat, whatever. But things have been happening that, taken together, are intriguing.\n\n1) He looks like no cat we've ever had. Slightly different gait, facial structure, and is very large. He's only about 4 months and is already probably north of 10 lbs by a bit.\n\n2) He can't genuinely meow. He can purr, but when he tries meowing it's almost like a series of small chirps.\n\n3) He is EXTREMELY people driven. He loves attention at all times, will go limp as a rag doll if you pick him up, plays fetch, and compulsively gnaws on your hands as you pet him, like a puppy might--no broken skin.\n\n4) He is apparently hypoallergenic. My fiancee is intensely allergic to cat dander and doesn't do well with long furred dog dander, even. Yet she seems able to play with him with impunity.\n\n5) The final, most bizarre thing, isn't even something he did. My aunt took him to the vet and the vet asked \"How much did [blindfire40's mom] pay for this cat?\" As we got him for free from under our tires, it's certainly odd that the vet would ask that.\n\nTo assist in identification, I've attached a [few pictures] of him. It may be that he's simply a bizarre tabby, and that's fine too, because we certainly love him. But Mom's got this idea that he's one of the intergrades between domestic and a wild cat, for the reasons listed above.", "summary": "My cat is weird. Lookit the pictures and please tell me if you think he's anything but a normal housecat."}
{"id": "t3_1r80tk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [28M] motivate my GF [26F] of one year to take care of herself?", "post": "Some background:\n\nAlthough she is making large strides toward taking the world head on, she has extreme issues with self-image, self-worth, and an overall complete lack of confidence. She could be absolutely gorgeous if she wanted to and leave me in the dust for a much better looking guy, but she does absolutely nothing to take care of herself. She rarely wakes up before 9am, brushes her teeth about every other day, she might shave her legs once every few months. She maintains absolutely no upkeep on her body. \n\nShe has beautiful long red hair, yet I have never once seen it in any form other than parted directly down the middle (think Millie from Freaks and Geeks). She owns absolutely no type of hair holding mechanism, any kind of makeup, and virtually no clothes. Unless she is working, she seldom wears anything other than pajamas. She seems to spend most of her days lost in the dream world of the future, making lots of grand plans, but doing nothing to follow through on them.\n\nLet me be well understood that none of these things are required by me, but it was my understanding these things generally help women feel better about themselves.\n\nI spend a lot of time trying to motivate her by telling her she's beautiful, smart, capable, and how much I love her. I sometimes buy things and put them in the bathroom/shower that I think she may like or may be interested in using (facial cleansers, luffas, etc.) but nothing seems to work. I am a very motivating and positive person, but most of the time I feel as if she is just ignoring my attempts to help her take life head-on.\n\nWhat more can I do to help her gain confidence?", "summary": "gf won't take care of herself. rarely shaves/cleans/leaves pajamas. what do?"}
{"id": "t3_3gfil2", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Starting a relationship with a minor depressive disorder.", "post": "I was assessed with minor depressive disorder a few months back. I work out, do yoga, sleep well ect. I'm perfectly OK right now, but if any of you guys are familiar or have experienced depression how long/diffulcat it can be to feel like \"you\" again.\n\n Anyways I'm absolutely terrified of starting a relationship because if things even go remotely bad I fall apart. I'm really sensitive to the idea no longer being \"liked\" by the person I care about. \n\n I have repetitive cycle I always slip into; It basically goes like this. \n\nHappy, Healthy & Confident (me right now)> find a girl I really like > date girl for 2- 4 weeks > things go bad > 7month - 2 year(max) long depressive episode > Happy Again > repeat.\n\nI've honestly experienced this cycle for the last  10 years of my life, I've **dated** about 5 girls. Then I'm a bit of wreck afterwards. It's something that I think about a lot, whether or not I will ever be able to have any sort of lasting relationship.", "summary": "scared to start dating again because theres a very good chance I will end up with me being depressed. I enjoy not being depressed."}
{"id": "t3_40xe9u", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Can my Financial Planner potentially screw me over?", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nI really hope this is considered the right subreddit for this type of question.\n\nLong story short, my current Financial Planner is an old friend of mine. We recently had a fairly serious falling out and now I'm worried that my funds could potentially be jeopardized because emotion is involved.\n\nThe guy is more or less acting like everything between us is fine, however he's incredibly young (21) and in some ways childish. I can't help but worry that there may be some resentment there which ultimately leads to poor decision making or even malicious intent towards me.\n\nObviously the only real solution here is to disconnect entirely, which I will. What I'm really wanting to know is if there's anything I should be worried about in doing so, or if there's anything he may be able to do as I really don't know how much control a Financial Planner has over funds or how protected we are as clients.\n\nFor the record I live in Australia, if this changes anything.", "summary": "My Financial Planner used to be a very close friend. We had a falling out and now I'm worried my funds are in jeopardy."}
{"id": "t3_4z2988", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going to a Coldplay concert.", "post": "As some of you may know, Coldplay played at the Rose Bowl yesterday on their tour. I got tickets months in advance and I guess you can say I was pumped for this event.\n\nI woke up a tad bit late so I just ate cereal and left for the concert. Upon arrival, we walked around a bit to check out the stands and it was moderately hot outside. When I got in line with my friends and parents the line wasn't moving much because the gates haven't opened yet, so I was just standing in the beating sun. I was thinking about buying a bottle of water, but it was $6 for that and $8 for lemonade!!! \n\nAll of a sudden, I felt my body slip and my vision start to get foggy and I blacked out and faceplanted straight into the ground. I woke up about 15-20 seconds later with ambulance people around me. Long story short I ended up taking the ambulance to the ER, I got stitches for my chin, a minor concussion, a loose front tooth, and chipped tooth all because I was dehydrated. So the lesson here is to keep yourself hydrated out there and sit yourself down if you don't feel right.", "summary": "Went to Coldplay concert, water prices hella expensive, blacked out, went to ER, crappy day and missed the concert"}
{"id": "t3_3zkt9l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[18M] am worried that my [17F] girlfriend is being dishonest with me, and going behind my back.", "post": "Hey r/relationships, throwaway for the usual reasons. I've been with my girlfriend for close to a year now (10th months) and things have been good. We are both seniors in high school, (i know, high school problems) and plan on staying together after high school ends. \n\nIn the summer she started a new job in the local mall, where she became friends with a co-worker there. Before he knew how old she was He constantly flirted with her. He was 22 at the time. Whenever we were together he would be constantly texting her and she would often talk about him, and stories he told her. Not long after he met he told her about how much sex he has and things like that, and he was very open about it. \n\nNow, this made me very uncomfortable as he was both over the age of majority, and flirting with my girlfriend. I told her this, and she told me she would stop but she would still bring him up while we were together, even after she started a new job (previous employer didn't treat her very well.)\n\nThat brings us to last month. While I was using her phone to call mine (lost it) he texted her. Curious, I opened it (I know I probably shouldn't have, but what's done is done) and they had been talking about as much as we usually do. The worst of it being that she flirted back from what I saw. \n\nWhen I confronted her about it again she said it wouldn't happen again, but today her phone lit up while we were having lunch and it was from him. I didn't open it, but I now feel pretty hurt that she lied to me about not talking to him. \n\nWhere do I go from here?", "summary": "Guy from my girlfriends work hit on her, he's a lot older, it makes me uncomfortable. Told my girlfriend, she assured it wouldn't happen and it still does."}
{"id": "t3_g4n7z", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Best way to sneak in tons of pages to cheat from on a midterm?", "post": "The teacher doesn't watch over us and instead tells us to give her our stuff and bring only what we'll need to take the test (paper, pencil, pen, eraser, etc.) I have an insanely hard midterm to do where the teacher chooses around 20 words out of almost 100 and tells you to appropriately define 10 thus I was supposed to memorize nearly 100. Then comes two essay questions based on the books/lecture and you choose one.The papers I have for the definitions and whatnot come out to be around around 10-25. Anyone know the best way to sneak them in?", "summary": "How can I sneak in 10-25 pages of notes into a room without backpack (so basically inside my clothes or wallet/pocket if it will fold I would assume)."}
{"id": "t3_16hwfj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why do people hate poor tippers??? (mostly applies to the U.S.)", "post": "I'll just start off by saying I was a waiter and a part time bartender (who isn't lol) And I have no problem with people not giving tips BECAUSE I'M PAID TO GIVE SERVICE ALREADY. (no matter what you think about human dignity and etc, being a waiter at a low/medium end restaurant is a low skilled low pay job. it's not worth shit. Now if you want to earn some real money, go to waiter school and etc and get into a high end restaurant. those people make 25-35k+ a year not including tips. which can push it to over 50k a year easily.)\n\nWhen people go into service jobs, they get paid to give great service to the customers. (or shitty service if they're feeling self entitled) It's part of their job. Why do people feel that unless they get a great tip in return, they'll ignore their basic job description and responsibilities and give shitty service to the customer?\n\nI know that this is way more valid in the states that forces businesses that employs people that receive tips to pay minimum wage (yes... there are states where you're allowed to pay less than minimum wage if the job has tip earning potential)\n\nAlmost every country I've been to, tipping has always been optional and in some countries it's not even an option (japan, china, etc to list some countries). Hell. When my friend tried to leave a tip in Japan, the waitress ran out with the money thinking he forgot it there... and waiters still doesn't get paid shit there either. (In China, they would just keep it but not as tip or anything. more like they found money on the streets)\n\nWhen I don't give that large of a tip, people always think i'm a penny pinching asshole. (I do in bars for the bartenders since they deal with so god damn much... way worse than restaurants...) I just simply don't see a reason to give great tip when the service mostly is mediocre.", "summary": "I see no reason to tip great when their job is to give good/great service for their hourly wage. (a thought shared by many other countries)"}
{"id": "t3_1rgj6j", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Want School to Write for Online Grad Degree, How to Write Proposal", "post": "Hey all.  I have been working at my current employer for almost three years.  My employer is very generous, and they send us IT technicians (I am a help desk guy, but we are a small IT group and get involved in many projects doing a lot more than that) to training yearly.  This is a job abroad and this means most of the tech training must be done in region in another country or far off in the United States.  Others with a higher pay grade get tuition benefits, I do not.  I am not complaining, my first job out of school would not even pay for training down the street ...\n\nSo I want to write a proposal that I can plan out an online MS in Computer Science, that every year would be cheaper than flying me out, putting me in a hotel, and paying for an expensive training course.  Does anyone have experience with this?  What format should I use?  Anyone know where to even find samples?  Not sure what to call this.", "summary": "Want to write to my employer saying I can do grad school cheaper than yearly training sessions.  How would I write a report/proposal to ask?"}
{"id": "t3_4fv4vf", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "My computer is fucked but I don't know what to do.", "post": "Hello reddit. I have an old Acer laptop I use daily and recently it stopped working. I followed the instructions to refresh it but that didn't fix anything. I don't really want to take it to shop because I was really into 4chan a while ago and downloaded a lot of porn and Nazi imagery. (Not an actual Nazi in fact I'm half black) I dont want the repair guys to see that stuff as hate speech is illegal where I live and all the tech guys are Indian. I'm also only 17 so my dad might find out too. I want my files and computer back, but I'm not sure that's going to be possible.", "summary": "computer is broken and it has a bunch of porn and Nazi stuff that I really want back but I also don't want the repairman or my dad to see it."}
{"id": "t3_37tyfh", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[26/m] just broke up with my girlfriend [23/f] because I caught her sending nudes. Am I in the right and what next.", "post": "Been dating this girl for 6 years. We both agreed it would be best if we both had stable jobs and completed our education before thinking about marriage.  \n  \n\n2 months ago I caught my girlfriend sending text messages to a 'friend' from church. It wasn't the fact that she was texting a man it was what they were talking about. One message from the other read something like 'i hope we can be in a relationship in the future'. Even after this she still continued to talk to him. Once I saw the message I confronted her about it and she acted naive and said she would end it.  \n  \nFast forward to last night. After a date at a concert and a couple beers she receded to the bedroom. As I was not ready for bed I walked into the bedroom to grab my charger and a night shirt. I found her shirt up and pants down. I asked her what was going on and she replied that she was just taking a picture. I brushed it off and went back to what I was doing.  \n2 hours later I climbed in bed and noticed her phone was still playing music. I reached over to turn it off and noticed that her indicator light was flashing yellow and she had a snapchat. By this point I was concerned that the picture taking was related so I opened snapchat to a single message 'wow I was not expecting that'.  \nCurious as to who this guy was, and I admit at this point I am in the wrong, I searched her messages for the user name. It came back from a Facebook message from a guy who is friends with my sister and they had met at my sister's wedding 9 months ago.  \nI woke her up asking who was so and so and why he would send her that message. Her reply was '... I didn't send naked pictures to him tonight'  \nTo make a long story short I broke up with her.", "summary": "girlfriend texting guy with more then friends details. Gets caught. Acts naive. Does it again with a different guy and naked pictures.  "}
{"id": "t3_3edolt", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by forgetting to shut my bathroom door overnight.", "post": "I moved into this house about a month ago, renting a room and a bathroom. Landlord is my age, didn't know him before I moved in. His dog. 8 month old lab. Pain in the ass. Tears apart everything, I've lost five pairs of flip flops already since I moved in thanks to this shoe shredding dick head.\n\nI forgot to shut my bathroom door last night. I'm an extremely clean person but for the past two days I have forgotten to empty the trash in my bathroom because we've been out doing shit and not home.\n\nMother nature is here for this girl. I woke up at 4am this morning to the little idiot barking at his dog house outside, for whatever reason he's deathly afraid of it but it's too hilarious to burn the damn thing. So I got up to let him out, and what do ya know. Every piece of trash that was in my midget garbage in my bathroom was shredded all over the floor. Everywhere.\n\nRemember how I said mother nature had arrived with her monthly? Yup. Garbage all over my bathroom and the SHARED living room. That includes a few stupid plastic tampon insert things. THAT HE CHEWED UP. NO USED TAMPONS.. just the plastic inserts.\n\nGood news: I clean them before I throw them in the garbage because ew if not. But still.. Bad news: I had to search every inch of that house before roommate landlord bro woke up for work. Prayed to the Heavens above that the little prick didn't bring any into his room. Or his bed.", "summary": "Didn't shut my bathroom door overnight. Landlord's dog chewed up my trash. Including a few tampon insert things."}
{"id": "t3_2b1zi0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my boyfriend [23 M] of 5 years are on a break I initiated but now I can't cope", "post": "I suggested a break after not receiving the attention I wanted in a relationship. I constantly felt lonely when with him because he'd be too busy doing things that seemed more important. \n\nHe never wanted to cuddle or talk about anything other than work. It got to the point where I had to ask him to kiss me and he'd sigh. I was hurting for a long time before asking for a break. He cried and told me he loved me (something i hadn't heard before) and it hurt that I had to break it off to finally hear him say it.\n\nIt's been a week and I'm mad at myself because I've made contact and at first I was in control but now it seems like I'm trying to keep in touch and he's barely responding. \n\nI know the right thing to do is pull back but I feel lonelier than ever and after 5 years, it's become a way of life to have him there. He's taking this time to work on himself but he doesn't know when he'll be ready. \n\nHow long do I wait for? How should I act towards him in the meantime? I'm afraid that he'll forget me.", "summary": "On a break from the bf so he can work on himself but I can't deal without hearing from him even though it was my idea"}
{"id": "t3_1lcgp6", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I'm sure every woman goes through this....", "post": "Although I am extremely happy and excited for everyone's engagement, wedding, pregnancy, 2nd child, etc...it definitely puts some perspective on what I want to do with my own life. I can't even begin to describe how scary the thought of \"growing up\" is. Yes, I have more adult responsibilities, and I have to commit to a schedule to make money, however, I still see myself as a kid. At 25, I definitely take life seriously, but...committing to something/somebody for the rest of your life? I suppose I'm not mature enough to make that kind of decision.  I feel as though it confirms our mortality. You graduate, get a job, get married, knock out some kids, then you're done. I just want so desperately to hold on to my youth. Is this a bad thing?\n\nTo those who have already taken that step, do you just KNOW that you're ready? And please understand I am not trying to steal your thunder or rain on your parade, I just kind of want some sort of understanding as to HOW you reach that certainty.", "summary": "All my peers are getting engaged, married, pregnant and it's reaffirming my own mortality, which in turn, is freaking me out."}
{"id": "t3_tk8e0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriends sex drive tanked the moment we became official. What could have happened, and how do I deal?", "post": "I and my girlfriend are both 20 years old. I am a male and she is female. We've been together for about 3 months now and both of us go to the same college. We started off as a friends and would constantly flirt, talk about sex, wrestle, and cuddle; pretty much every indicator that we both wanted sex to happen. And eventually it did; we became friends with benefits.  The sex was amazing, and daily. We even decided to try for having sex 100 times in 100 days. At day 20 we'd had sex 27 times, and this included being apart for a week. She was insatiable, I could barely keep up with her.\n\nEven before we started having sex I'd always had a thing for her, and as time went on we started spending more and more time together. Finally I asked her if she was willing to make what was already a relationship in all but word, official. To my joy she said yes. \n\nAnd almost immediately after we actually became a couple, her libido bombed. Circumstances beyond control forced us to cancel our attempt at 100 times in 100 days, and in the three short months since we've become official we've gone from sex one or two times a day to having sex maybe once or twice a week. More than that, she's no longer as receptive or interested in flirting the way we used to before we became a 'we'.\n\nI'm a very, very sexual person, I feel that a healthy, frequent sex life is essential to a strong relationship. I also feel that communication is important, so I've approached her and discussed whats happened with her. Neither of us have any idea what's going on, and neither of us like it. But I'm so tired of having my sexual advances being rejected by my girlfriend that its getting to the point that I don't even want to try to initiate sexual contact anymore.\n\nSo my question is, what could have happened, and how do I fix it? And if I can't fix it, what are some tips for dealing with the physical rejection?", "summary": "A great new relationship is being ruined by a boyfriend's super sex drive and a girlfriend's sudden lack of one. How can I either bring the first down or the second up."}
{"id": "t3_2z6k09", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I'm a 17 yo and need help with what to do.", "post": "Hi all, \nFirst time poster long time lurker, I am a 17 year old guy living in the UK and have got offers to go and study at university next academic year (starting September). My parents over the years have saved me around \u00a33500 for when I start to make my way in the world. I currently don't even have any form of current account or savings account in my name. My main goal is to put away maybe \u00a32500 of this into a savings account and try and earn some decent interest. I also hold around \u00a3700 in premium bonds and wonder if it is better to pool all my assets into one savings account whilst having around \u00a31000 in a current account. Essentially what I am asking is what is the best course of action for someone in my position from the perspective of someone with a lot more financial knowhow than myself? My studies will primarily be funded by the government tuition fee and maintaince loans.", "summary": "I have savings and bonds but don't know what to do to get the most out of them, suggestions on account types ect. would be great"}
{"id": "t3_2pxj3b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/F] with my former teacher [50ish?/M] who touches me during conversation in a way that is making me uncomfortable.", "post": "I'm a classical musician and I began studying with this teacher when I was 12. So I mean, I understand if he has a sort of fatherly view towards me. However, recently we started doing a gig together and I noticed that he is now touching me sometimes during conversation in ways that makes me quite uncomfortable.\n\nDuring performances for example, it is common for musicians to congratulate the person sitting next to them on a well-played solo by patting their own leg in a sort of light-clapping motion. After one of my solos, in the middle of the piece, he reached over and touched MY leg. No one does that. And he didn't really pat my leg, he sort of wiggled his fingers on my leg in this sort of \"tickle\" motion which was kind of weird. \n\nI had a very large solo in this piece we played, and later after the piece ended, he then put his hand rather intimately on my back, leaned over until his face was literally an INCH away from my face and whispered, \"Beautiful.\" That definitely made me feel quite uncomfortable.\n\nThis in addition to other such gestures has started to really grate on my nerves. However, he was my teacher and mentor for six years, has still been helping me with musical things by hooking me up with gigs and a great many other things that I'm truly grateful for. I don't think he means these physical gestures in a sexual way (OMG I hope not...), but how do I broach the subject without totally offending him or making things beyond awkward? At the same time, I don't think it's right for him to be doing that. I highly doubt he touches his male students in such a fashion.", "summary": "Former private teacher/mentor physically touches me or gets way too close for me to feel comfortable. Don't know how to tell him to stop without offending him or making our relationship super awkward."}
{"id": "t3_1rp8pq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] have a huge crush on my counselor.", "post": "I understand the whole transference thing and having a crush on your counselor is fairly common.  \n\nBut I swear to god that the feeling is mutual.  I've had counselor in the past and none have been like this.  I've dated many girls and I know the queues.  Yea I could be way off but this isn't the main reason for my post.\n\nSO because I have it in my head that it is mutual, I keep having these fantasies of firing her as my counselor and asking her out.  She is only a registered clinical counselor so there is no law that she has to wait before going on a date.  I totally understand that this sounds completely outlandish and it most likely is soooo... \n\nMaybe this should be part of my counseling.  I have read all over the internet that if you start developing feelings for your counselor that you should tell them.  I feel extremely shy to do it.  I literally honestly do want to date her, if we met under any other circumstances we probably would.  \n\nSo what do I do?  Just tell her?  Fire her and ask her on a date?  Just ignore these feelings entirely (don't like this one because it's hindering).\n\nMainly it would be nice to hear from someone who went through something similar?", "summary": "I want to date my counselor.  I have a crush on her and I swweeaar the feeling is mutual. Should I tell her in session about my feelings, or should I just ignore them?"}
{"id": "t3_1rtg6s", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/m] How do I shift my girlfriend's (18/f) views that we can both be financially responsible for ourselves?", "post": "I don't really know to format that title but I'm in college and she's in high school and she has no clue why I'm poor all the time and why I complain about money. I paid for her homecoming celebration (200-300 at least) and that pretty much emptied my bank account for the semester...in late October.\n\nWe went on a date last night and I asked her if we could split checks and this made her *livid*. \"I guess this isn't a date\" she said. I asked her why it's so hard for her, a girl with TWO jobs and a dad with an endless bank account, to just provide for herself when I'm struggling with money *every fucking day* and will be for 4 more years at least. She was annoyed and fiddled with her phone while I made attempts at conversation again until she said she can \"get used to my money situation\" because *her dad* explained that I was going to be a poor college student for a while.\n\nAnd that brings me here. This girl sits on her iPhone at school and picks and chooses Nordstrom boots to buy with her dad's credit card (not even her own) and has the audacity to get ticked off when I can't afford a dinner date because it all goes towards helping me survive to the next day at college. What can I say to help her understand how ridiculous this is?", "summary": "High school girlfriend has endless money while college kid me has no money from shit I've spent to either see her or provide for her already and is annoyed at me for not having money. How do I fix this?"}
{"id": "t3_efrgc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's the best way to find a great deal on flights only?", "post": "So, I'm flying with my boyfriend from PHX AZ to San Jose CA right after Christmas so he can meet my family for the first time.\n\nWe're avoiding travelocity/expedia/whatever other 'discount' websites because 1. Southwest always has better deals straight through them, and 2. I've heard horror stories and don't want our vacation to tank.\n\nI was wondering if anyone had any tricks for finding great deals?  So far I'm finding $78-$117 per ticket (one way) as the cheapest, which isn't so bad.  But I'm curious to see if anyone has any tips or tricks I'm not aware of?  Or possibly a promo code that could help me out?\n\nI've been searching and going nuts trying to find a good deal, so now I'm turning to reddit to see if someone can help me out!", "summary": "I need tips on how to find a cheap flight without going with one of those shitty discount sites (i.e. travelocity)"}
{"id": "t3_4yb8ku", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "M[20] confused by F[20] sending mixed messages regarding meeting up", "post": "So a couple weeks ago I got with a girl I knew from high school at a club. In the morning she gave me her number and we've been texting a fair amount since then. \n\nLast week I asked her out for drinks and she said she may be busy but might be able to do Friday. She bailed on going out on the Friday as she'd been out the night before but said she'd definitely see me this week.\n\nSo I asked her tuesday if she wanted to do something Wednesday and she again said maybe as she thought she already had plans with her friend. She then text me late yesterday afternoon to say she's busy.\n\nSo I went out with my best friend who works with her and he got the impression that she doesn't want to go out with me. She said she's going away to study abroad for a year in a few weeks and thinks I've forgotten and doesn't really want to get into a relationship. She had mentioned both of these things the night I got with her but she'd also said she didn't like one night stands so I have no idea what I was.\n\nHonestly I just can't quite understand why you'd say your up for going out with someone then do everything you can to avoid it. I'd begun to think she didn't want to as she wouldn't give me an idea when she could go out when I tried to ask her.\n\nJust looking for some advice on what to do next. I feel like she is attracted to me but doesn't want to get to deep into things. Should I just ask her if she doesn't actually want to see me or just stop trying to set stuff up with her and move on?", "summary": "Asked a girl out I've been texting for a while. Says she up for seeing me but her actions imply she doesn't actually want to."}
{"id": "t3_2d563h", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Cheat meals (need advice!)", "post": "So my basic diet (which I started about 3 weeks ago) is mostly just calorie counting.  According to everything Ive seen online, my BMR (or TDEE...I'm actually not sure what the difference of them are) is somewhere around 2500/day.  On Sunday-Friday I shoot for 1400-1700 cal/day.  On Saturdays I'll have a light breakfast and light lunch, and then a cheat meal for dinner.  My overall goal is to keep Saturday under 2700 cal.  \n  \nSo, yesterday was cheat meal.  I planned the whole day out to be 2400 cal.  For dinner we went to chili's and I got a bacon cheeseburger and swapped the fried for corn on the cob.  I also had 3 diet cokes.  I wake up this morning, and I'm nearly 3 pounds heavier than when I weighed myself yesterday.  \n  \nDoes this represent an actual 3 pound gain, or is it probably just food and drink sitting in my stomach.  Should I be doing something different in cheat meals? It was a really good meal, but if its going to undo an entire week its not worth it.  Its kinda frustrating because everyone who is successful seems to really repeat the calories in, calories out thing, but that equation doesn't explain a huge overnight weight gain.", "summary": "Went way above normal cal/day (but still very close to BMR) for cheat meal.  Three pounds heavier the next morning.  Problem with meal? Problem with scale? Normal reaction?"}
{"id": "t3_374fap", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "First kitten... my brother and I disagree on something.", "post": "My brother and I adopted a kitten from a friend who's roommate next year is allergic to cats. Everything's fine so far, since we grew up with cats (We know what we need to take care of them), but we disagree on what I think is a fairly major issue.\n\nMy parents, when raising cats back home, would leave out a bowl of dry cat food and a bowl of water in the kitchen. That's how I wanted to feed our kitten, by just supplying a little in a bowl and keeping it at a near constant level as we notice it going down. My brother, deciding that the way our parents fed our cats contributed to our oldest cat's weight gain (He's been with us almost 16 years now, and has been fat since he was 2 or 3, and my brother has seemingly forgotten how often my mom treated the old cat with turkey and other cat treats), is trying to tell me that we need to only feed the kitten at certain times, and in certain portions.\n\nThat just feels wrong to me, since it's obviously going to still be growing, and I don't think he should be worried about weight gain in a kitten. And I'm not trying to tell him to leave a full bowl out all the time, but to just leave some in there for when the kitten gets hungry at a non-brother approved time.", "summary": "Bro wants to put kitten on a scheduled/controlled diet, I think we need to just let it eat when it's hungry."}
{"id": "t3_3hzltt", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Move my stuff for your own? what?", "post": "okay so yesterday I was at a local baseball game and I was sitting with a friend of mine. Since no one was sitting on the bench next to me, I put my purse and water bottle next to me. About 2 innings in, a woman comes up to me and asks me to move my stuff. \nMe, being a kind person and assuming that she was going to use that seat for sitting, I put my bag and water bottle on my lap. \nThen the woman PUTS HER OWN PURSE on the bench where my stuff used to be and sits down next to it (mind there is plenty of space further down the bench). \nI'm socially anxious so I was not about to confront the whale but she can enjoy my overly obnoxious gum chewing and foot tapping for the next 7 innings!", "summary": "self entitled woman asks me to move my stuff only to replace it with hers, has my gum snapping in her ear for the rest of the game"}
{"id": "t3_153mos", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "What could she have meant by saying this (20f, 20m)?", "post": "Hi all, I had a sloppy make out with a good friend and developed feelings for her over the next day or so while hanging out.  Time went by, I tried to let those feelings go by dating two other women, but I could only go back to thinking about that one night with my friend.\n\nI ended up actually talking to her best friend about it while drunk and like most normal humans - her friend mentioned that I said something to her - she replied **\"I don't want to talk about it because we are like best friends\"**\n\nYet we still tease the hell out of each other and get really touchy/flirty when we are near another in group outings.  Is it time to tell her how I feel? Or try to get her to go out on an actual date before I say something?", "summary": "She's confusing the hell out of me and I don't know whether or not to tell her how I feel over the phone or skype, or if I should ask her out and talk then.*"}
{"id": "t3_zgnp8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "24F: 26M boyfriend wants to reconnect with the girl he was seeing when we started dating?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. When we started dating he was seeing multiple people. He ended it with them about a month and a half into our relationship. I never knew he had been seeing other girls until months later. It has been a source of pain for me in the relationship (our first kiss or date don't feel special knowing he was sleeping with someone else the night before)\n\nOne in particular, he has built a bit more with. They dated about a month. When he ended it with her she was very hurt, which suggests that there are unresolved feelings on her side. They did not know each other prior to dating, and have not spoken since.\n\nWe are moving overseas in a month. My boyfriend has decided to go for drinks with this girl to say goodbye. He has expressed a desire to tell her what he is up to because she would feel proud. He also said that although he has no romantic or sexual feelings, he still feels emotions for her.\n\nI am very uncomfortable with this. I dont understand why it is important to say goodbye to a closed chapter that he hasn't spoken to in over a year. I am uncomfortable with the fact that his train of thought was how proud she would be of him.\n\nI suggested either emailing/phoning her, or me being introduced to her before they go out, but he turned down both of this options, saying he wouldn't want to put her in the awkward position of meeting the girl he left her for (even though she never knew he left for another girl). Shouldn't my own uncomfortable position be taken into account?\n\nAny input would be greatly appreciated. The fact that we are moving makes any red flags even more important so that I don't make a mistake.", "summary": "my boyfriend wants to have an intimate dinner or drinks with the girl he was dating when we met, and I am not allowed to meet her."}
{"id": "t3_35eusg", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "First date ever, going to the beach. Would like some tips", "post": "Hey Reddit! I (20M) would like some tips, because I have my first ever date tomorrow (although I've had a gf for 3 years, but no actual dating happened), and we're going to the beach.\n\nI met this girl, we have mutual friends, at a festival a few days ago. We didn't kiss, but we talked, held hands, danced a bit. I asked her to go on a date with me, which was super hard as it is the first time I've asked this to anybody. What I mean to say is, it's not like a standard *first* date because we already spent some time together.\n\nI'm really nervous and excited. I'm going to pick her up tomorrow, we're cycling to the beach which will take 30 minutes, and then what? I'm a bit scared. Should I bring something (the weather, although no rain and sunny, is not super so no swimming), should we do something. I'd like all the tips I can get. Thanks!", "summary": "First date after 3 years in a relationship, going to the beach, terrified. What to bring with me, what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_3key8a", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I got 1/2 of the credit cards I wanted. Should I get rid of the secured card with a monthly fee?", "post": "I had this $500 secured credit card with PNC for almost two years. I also rode along my mother's car loan.  Earlier this year I applied for PNC cash builder and was denied, but was approved for target credit card (5% at target), sallie mae (5% at Amazon), and Amazon credit card (I did this one before learning about sallie). I was initially given 300 limit for target but they upped it to 800 after five months. Amazon and sallie both gave me 3100 limit.\n\nI recently applied for pnc cash builder again and got denied again. They really don't like the loan amount vs my income. Anyway, now that I have some real credit rolling, can I go ahead and terminate the secured credit card? It charges $3 monthly and I don't see a reason to use it now that I have cards that give me rewards. I would like pnc cash builder because that's the checking account branch I use, but I don't see the car loan going away in less than two years. I suppose there's citi double cash card but I doubt I'll qualify now that I had so many hard checks this year. The secured card is the oldest credit line I have so my credit score will probably take a hit when I get rid of it. Sallie/target won't take the cards back though right?", "summary": "About to cancel my secured card with monthly fees, now that I got big boy credit cards. Is there anything I'm forgetting?"}
{"id": "t3_10d1eb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit, what are the silliest things you've gotten into an argument about?", "post": "My Boss just sent me home because I was trying to clarify exactly what he wanted me to wipe down the tables with. Of course it didn't start out as an argument, but when I was attempting to double check what spray cleaner to use (so that I didn't ruin the finish or anything like that) he decided instead of flat out telling me to just continue to yell at me for the amount of times he had to ask me to wipe them down. I am a sensitive person (okay fine I'm totally a cry baby) and my eyes started to well up as I was attempting to defend myself/just figure out what solution to use so I could start wiping them down! No tears fell, and I've explained to him before that I'm an emotional person, that just because my eyes start to well up does not mean I don't have a hold on myself, my tear ducts routinely betray me! This made him even angrier and so now I have the afternoon off I guess.\n\nI don't normally wipe the tables down, thats not in my job description, and I usually arrive after the morning shift completes the task, so I've never seen it done before. I'm assuming he was just stressed about something, but whoooo boy did he get mad at me!! I guess clarification questions are more inflammatory than I thought.\n\n###", "summary": "Clarification of Cleaning Solution escalates to Boss in a tizzy. (It was the Windex the whole time!!!)"}
{"id": "t3_3233yl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Relationship seems to have hit a speed bump between me (19M) and (19F)", "post": "All right, here's the deal. When the semester started, I met this girl in my Chem lab and we started talking. Infrequently for a while, but around a month ago started to pick up to the point that it was every day for the past few weeks. Anyway, I was very much into this girl. She's very pretty, and shares so many interests with me, it was a little surreal. \n\nTwo weeks ago we went on a date, which went really well, we ended up kissing at the end and I was a happy man. Ideally we would have had a second date this weekend or last, but it was easter and she went home, and this weekend is out for other reasons. So here's the problem. Starting earlier this week, our contact started to taper off, effectively not talking whatsoever this week. Obviously I was a little concerned, given how much we'd been talking before, so I said I'd like to talk to her, and she said she wanted to talk to me as well. \n\nSo we talk on the phone a bit, and here's the issue. She tells me that she wasn't sure if we were a couple or not (something we hadn't discussed, and I wasn't clear on either), and that she didn't feel ready to be in a couple. She said that she was still emotional over her last breakup, and she didn't feel emotionally ready to be in a relationship with me yet. This is followed by saying that she does really like me and wants to keep hanging out and talking and all that jazz. I of course understand that you can't control feeling not ready, and told her that, and saying that while disappointed, I wouldn't guilt trip her or pressure her into anything. \n\nAnyway, the vibe that I got was that a relationship wasn't off the table, just not right now. I feel that any relationship we would have would be a healthy, lengthy, and fulfilling one. So I suppose my wondering here is what I should do to make it clear that I am open to a relationship and fostering that relationship potential, while maintaining the friendship and giving her the time she needs.", "summary": "Girl doesn't feel ready for a relationship yet, I don't want to just give up on the idea. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_4hsltd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I want to be single but I'm dating someone", "post": "I  (18F) was in an off again on again relationship for roughly 2 years. It was abusive and horrible for both of us and I recently ended it a few months ago. I wanted to be single badly. I'm mildly attractive, I get the occasional compliment. Im still in my first year of uni and I've been dead set on having my \"hoe phase\" that my girlfriends have been encouraging me to take but I haven't done anything for four months. I could have but I just haven't. I really like being single, I had forgotten this type of freedom! Recently I met Dan. He's shy, sweet, and fun to hang out with. Initially I told him straight off the bat I wasn't looking for anything serious and just wanted a casual fling. He said he was okay with that. We've been dating and hanging out a lot more recently and I think there might be feelings involved. I am the first girl he's ever been with and he's still on the awkward side when it comes down to physical things. I like him but I still have the itch to flirt and be single. Not sure how to proceed", "summary": "I want to be single but am kinda dating this guy. Not sure what to do, is it worth it to get into a relationship again?"}
{"id": "t3_326emz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [30 F] word going NO CONTACT with my ex [35 M], broke up two weeks ago, he still contacts me from time to time. I need to heal.", "post": "I broke up with him because he treated me like crap and would've never broken up with me because he benefited a lot from me being there for him. I was very unhappy and was truly the worst version of myself. Hated it. So i finally broke it off. \n\nNow, it's an emotional roller coaster. I feel a lot better at times. But I miss him constantly. I love him. But I *know* that I don't want him back because I don't want to be that unhappy again. I've paid my dues and gave him way too many chances. \n\nIt's been two weeks since we broke up and i saw on his FB page that he's been making \"special\" friends. He's moving on and it really pains my heart to see it. I stopped following his feed but what's to say i don't slip and look at his page again and fall into this depressive cycle again. I want to eliminate him from my life for the time being. \n\nHere's my dilemma. I deleted his number and I do no initiate contact. But he texts from time to time and tells me he misses me. I don't see the point of us communicating and it honestly just makes the love-drug impossible to leave my body. I need time and space to heal. \n\nPlease help. I have a fear that I might sound rude and this is preventing me from affirming myself and standing up for myself. I want to tell my ex in a message that although we've agreed on staying friends, can that happen later and can I have time to heal?", "summary": "How can I word a polite and stern message to tell my ex that we can't be FB friends anymore and I prefer a NO CONTACT period so I can heal."}
{"id": "t3_3k8ho5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] have have a massive crush on a girl [17 F], is she too young for me?", "post": "For the last 2 years I have been working with this girl. In that time we have had a lot of time to chat to one another and for the past year I have really wanted to ask her out on a date. The trouble is that she is 17 years old  (18 shortly after new year) and I'm concerned that the age gap is too large considering how young she is. A 23 year old dating a 17 year old seems a bit predatory to me.\n\nWhen it comes to dating, I have almost no experience and she could be the first person that I ask out. I am very introverted and find it hard talking to anyone let alone someone that I am attracted to. However I find this girl much easier to talk to than anyone and I really feel that she is perfect for me. We independently have discovered and watch the same television programs and even programs on the radio! (How many young people do you know that listen to the radio?). She is even about to start studying for the same degree as me.\n\nDo you think that she is too young for me? Would it be weird if I asked her out?\nI think about her all the time and really want to ask her out but I'm not sure what other people (my parents, her parents and our friends) would think about it. And I'm not sure how she would react.", "summary": "I want to ask a girl I've known for a long time out on a date but I'm worried that she is too young for me."}
{"id": "t3_t3hm2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I hate myself.", "post": "I have been dating my amazing boyfriend for 9 months. We are in our early 20's and have just recently started using the big \"L\" word. \n\nSo this past weekend I went out with some friends and ended up getting blackout drunk. I literally do not remember the night except for a few bits and pieces. My one friend, for some reason, kept trying to hook me up with one of her boyfriend's friends, even though she knows I have a boyfriend and that I was not at all interested. Anyways, as it turns out, later in the night when I am past gone, the guy decides to take me home with him. One of the things I do remember is him asking me to \"get out of here\" and saying no. But my next memory is of standing outside of a cab in an area I didn't recognize. The following memory I have is him unwrapping a condom and then after that the memory of getting dressed. That's all I know.\n\nI am beyond distraught and have been a crying mess for the past few days. The first thing I did though, was head to the clinic to get an STI test. The nurse told me it was too early to test but because I came so quickly they could give me pills to cure Gonorrhea and Chlamydia \"just in case\". The guy has also emailed me over facebook and I have confirmed that we did have sex and that a condom was used. \n\nMy question for you, Reddit, is how/should I tell my boyfriend about this? I love him so much and I feel so used and dirty about this. People keep telling me it's sexual assault but I can't help feeling responsible for it. I should know my limits when I drink. Please help!", "summary": "Got blackout drunk with some friends and had unwanted sex. Not sure if it counts as sexual assault. Need help explaining to boyfriend."}
{"id": "t3_54s627", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Things are moving with this girl (18F) for me (20M)", "post": "A week ago I hadn't kissed a girl yet. \n\nSince then I've gone on 4 dates, made out numerous times with this girl I met and even had her over and took off her bra and had some fun. \n\nBut for some reason my attraction is waning. Shes incredibly nice. Showed more interest in me than any other girl. But she already wants me to meet her family. And she messages me every hour. \n\nShould I trust my instincts or am I being self destructive?\n\nWhen she snaps me I no longer get that bubbly feeling. I just think: Oh I should probably respond to this. \n\nI was rock hard during my first kiss with her? How is that I was soft with her nipple in my mouth?", "summary": "Having all of my first experiences with this girl but she seems way more invested in me than I am in her. Do I say something?"}
{"id": "t3_1xlp3c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "First real break-up; regardless of how clean it was.", "post": "So, this is what it feels like to be broken up with. God it sucks. I (20/F) had gotten dumped this weekend by my ex-bf (21/M) of about 4 months. He told me that it was the right thing to do and that because we weren't compatible, it wouldn't have worked out anyways. In short, that is basically what happened. We talked, we cried, he tried to make me feel better, and he gave me some shaky reasons why we needed too. \n\nWhat bothers me the most, is that this conversation came out of left field. I was not prepared for this and I was thrown for a loop. I thought things were going okay, but I never saw a problem with it. We had said before that it wasn't going to last and I knew that going in, but this was a complete surprise. \n\nHe had time to think about it where I didn't so here I am. Single, right before Valentine's Day. I don't think it could get anymore depressing than that. But how do get over someone who lives in the same dorm as you? And especially if we are trying the whole friend thing out?", "summary": "Break up after 4 months, very emotionally attached, lives in the same dorm, and trying the friend thing. How do I get over him when I live down the hall from him?"}
{"id": "t3_2olrac", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19M) wanted to ask out friend of couple months (20M) only to find out his ex (20M) is moving in", "post": "I'm a student at college and I was going to confess all my sappy gooey feelings to a guy (Let's call him Mike) and ask him out. We hang out as much as we can on weekends. I've known Mike for a few months now and like I said, gooey feely blah - I was going to ask him out. \n\nSo as we were driving to a restaurant for dinner, he tells me about his new roommate(let's say Joey). Joey and Mike go back to elementary school. Turns out, they dated in high school and when Joey's parents found out about his homosexuality, they took all of his communication (phone, facebook, email everything). Mike tells me that nobody's seen or heard from Joey in years and messaged him through a fake Facebook account and Joey is moving across the country to get away from parents, but in doing this he is moving in with Mike. \n\nSo I'm shocked at dinner and the rest of the drive as Mike also talks about the huge probability of them being together. I couldn't say anything about me so I left earlier than we planned. My fear is that they are getting together and I'll be left in the dust. (Prob'ly happening anyway) and I still have all these feels for Mike but I don't want to ruin our friendship or get in the way of this soap opera story. I feel like it's my last chance to tell him. Should I? Is it a good idea?", "summary": "I got feels for guy. His ex appears from out of the blue to move in with him. I still want to tell him about all my feels."}
{"id": "t3_1qgzkv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it too soon [3 mos] for me (24/f) to tell my bf (26/m) that I love him? Should the woman even say it first?", "post": "Hi Reddit! I am using a throw away because my SO is a redditor. \n\nSo, I have been in a relationship with a wonderful man for 3 months. We are both very busy and career-driven people, but we eat dinner together every night and spend every night together. (We have not slept separately in over 2 months). He makes me insanely happy; he is my best friend in a lot of ways, and I already cannot imagine my life without him. \n\nFor the last couple of weeks I have wanted to tell my SO that I love him, but I am afraid for several reasons. \n1) It may be \"too soon.\"\n2) I feel vulnerable. \n3) I actually haven't told someone I love them since my last LTR (which was two years ago). \n4) I have never said it first, and part of me thinks that it might be because I was brought up to believe that men should say it first. \n\nAlso, in his last relationship, he told his gf that he loved her, and she decided shortly thereafter that she did not want to be with him anymore because she did not feel the same way.  I think he's hesitant to have the same thing happen with me. \n\nNow, I really feel that he loves me too. The way he looks at me, how thoughtful he is, the little things he does for me, all leads me to believe that he loves me too. I've met all of his significant family members, I've met all of his friends, we dressed up in a couples costume for Halloween, etc. But on some level I do not really know because he has not said it.  \n\nI guess I just want to know if it's strange that I am so scared, and if you all felt that it was too soon to tell him how I feel. How do you feel about women saying it first?", "summary": "When is the right time to say you love someone? Should I (a female) be afraid to say it first?"}
{"id": "t3_2ue9qh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (17 M) close friend (16 F) who I previously had a relationship with has become hostile to me for dating another girl who happens to be a close friend of hers", "post": "I know people in this sub tend to look down on teenage drama but this has been bugging me recently.\n\nMy old SO, we can call her Jane, were in a relationship for a significant length of time during middle school. Post relationship, I maintained a sort of \"gay best friend\" friendship with her; a very very close platonic partnership. Jane was supportive me of in my quest for love through high school, and I tried to help her out as well, but she has yet to have any luck whatsoever.\n\nRecently I started dating a third girl, who we will call Jill. Jill is in the same small friend group as Jane is, and I gained interest in Jill at the beginning of this year of high school. Jane was supportive of me, but she had big doubts about my chances will Jill, until it slipped out that Jill knew I fancied her and wouldn't mind a date. Even though I have seen images of these conversations, Jane has been telling me that Jill doesn't want to date, which I know is false because we began chatting up and are prepared to do an official first date soon.\n\nAs soon as news of this broke, Jane began to be more hostile to me that usual. We went from chatting every day for a few hours to twice in the last 2 weeks. She also insults me more (this is significant because although we maintained a very sarcastic attitude with each other, she has begun to cross a line and be mean). Jane is stonewalling my efforts here; it is unfair of her to intrude on this new relationship of mine. However, I don't know how to deal with this, because Jane is possibly my best friend but still is being a big nuisance.\n\nI don't know what to do here; I don't think I have to pick between Jane and Jill but it seems that I have to make that choice. Can someone explain what is happening? I have been out of the dating game for some time so I don't really get what issues are happening.", "summary": "I am split between Jane and Jill, and need help understanding Jane's issues so that I can properly deal with her and her very apparent jealousy"}
{"id": "t3_4ymepv", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(VA) We are breaking our lease and discovered water damage after moving furniture out. Next steps?", "post": "I apologize for any typos and formatting issues, writing this on mobile.\n\nWe signed the lease for our townhouse in January. Our landlord is the owner of the property, there is no middle management company. We are breaking our lease to move back to NC due to financial reasons and have had a great line of communication with our landlord since day 1. She has been working with us to find new tenants to take over the lease and understands that we are taking steps to adjust to our budget issues without missing any payments. She is empathetic to our budget issues, but not very lenient or forgiving of the rent payments.\n\nWe are taking off in the truck tomorrow, and after removing the furniture from the (fully finished) basement, we noticed warping from water damage on the wall panels. The two walls affected are exterior walls, and the damage is just below ground level, indicating foundation troubles. It's not so bad that our furniture was damaged, and the carpets are not wet, but there is definitely moisture in the walls.\n\nWe do not have new tenants signed for a lease yet, though we have shown the place to a few. We are responsible for paying rent until the either new tenants sign a lease, or our current lease ends in January. We cannot afford another month of rent here so it is very important we find new tenants soon.\n\nMy question is do we tell the landlord that we noticed it tomorrow, before they do the walkthrough Monday? We will not be here after Sunday. What we are worried about is 1) will we still be on the hook for rent if it becomes un-rentable while the repairs are being made, and 2) are we responsible for any damages if we don't notify the landlord, despite it being a structural/building problem?", "summary": "We are breaking our lease because we can't afford to live here anymore, discovered moisture in exterior facing walls, leaving the state for good tomorrow and don't know if (or how) to tell the landlord."}
{"id": "t3_2sgta8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] got dumped hard by [22F] friends for eight years, together for one or two, Long Distance", "post": "Basically, I met her on this dive of a chat site, initially for roleplaying and we both kind of stuck around,became good friends. About two or three years ago she mentioned that I was \"boyfriend\" material, so we decided to give it a try. She was a big Otaku, nd for a while,it was nice. Had fun,traded pictures. Dreamed of meeting one day. (She has...anti-social issues.That's all I will say)\n\nWe had rough patches like all relationships do,and I tried my best to keep us together. But last week it just got worse,and after having enough of being called an idiot, I pushed back,metaphorically, a night or two ago. I spoke some harsh words to her..and I guess fate was sealed. \n\nWe ended it just last night, and she emailed a mutual friend(also female)Who got pissed at me as well, and joined her in cutting off all contact with me", "summary": "I fell for a British Otaku(I'm Canadian), we started to fight alot last week. She's cut off all contact,and I feel like a sack of shit. "}
{"id": "t3_4rjpxj", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by buying my pregnant wife cleaning products for her birthday", "post": "At 7:30am today, I got a call from the delivery company.  \"Damnit, this is super early,\" I thought to myself.  My very pregnant wife rolled over and asked who I was talking to on the phone.  I informed her there was a delivery truck on the way.  \"Happy Birthday!\" I exclaimed with a shit-eating grin.  \n  \n*sigh*  \n  \nI had spent the last few months tirelessly researching my purchase.  Our household had been plagued by constant beeping sounds coming from the laundry room at all hours of the day and night.  So much so that we had been unplugging the decade-old washer and dryer when not using them.  It had been going on for years.  I resolved myself to fix this problem.  I'm a problem solver.  It's what I do.  There are 4th of July appliance sales.  My wife's birthday is around the 4th of July.  She would *love* it if I got one of those fancy-schmancy laundry sets with the steam and pedastals, right?  Great gift, right?  Come on, guys, at least humor me and pretend I'm not an idiot for a second.  \n    \nSo I splurged and bought the bestest set I could find and had it delivered as a present.  On my pregnant wife's birthday.  At 7:30am.  Waking her up.  \n  \nShe groggily comes downstairs so see my present...  \n  \nHer:  \"You bought me CLEANING SUPPLIES?? ....  FOR MY BIRTHDAY???\"   \n  \nMe: \"...\"    \n  \nHer: *disappointed look*  \n  \nMe: \"Happy Birthday...?\"  \n  \nHer: \"This is insulting\"  \n  \nMe: \"I'm sorry\"      \n\nYeah...  I am not a smart man.  We haven't spoken since the the delivery occurred.  I don't know if dinner plans are still on...", "summary": "Had a new washer/dryer delivered at 7:30am as my pregnant wife's birthday present.  Hilarity did not ensue."}
{"id": "t3_4ryq2i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (26M) fiancee (31F) is snooping on Facebook on guys she has had one night stands with. Im supposed to be \"cool\" with it.", "post": "We've been engaged for going on a year now, been together for 5 years. Im at work while she asked me to look up something on facebook. I forgot that she was using my phone earlier to log into Facebook because she couldn't find hers.\n\n So I go to the search bar and click on it to type in the friends name for the status she wanted me to read. Low and behold it shows that she looked up two guys yesterday that she had past one night stands with (well more or less booty calls ). I know this because we've both been very open about our past to each other.\n\n So I let my anger get the best of me and I confront her immediately through text. I ask her what she is doing on facebook and what's the reason that she is looking up these two guys. After much texting back and forth I get the bullshit answer that she was just nosey. I told her we'll talk about it when we get home. \n\nI get home and the conversation practically boils down to as previously that she was just \"nosey\" about what they're up to. I was told that it shouldn't really bother me and that I should be \"cool\" about the whole thing. \n\nWell im not fucking \"cool\" about it. I feel hurt and angry and jealous and confused all at the same time. I want to know why and nosey is an answer that just doesn't cut it for me. And on top of that, she claims that she looks at the one guys profile all the time because she grew up with the family during her childhood and she's seeing if any pictures were posted of them.\n\n Im not okay with this at all, I feel that there is something more. Maybe im looking into this too much but id like any insight that you guys can have for me.\n\n Thanks! \nOh and by the way if the formatting sucks im sorry, on mobile. Also knocking back a few beers now too, so spelling might suffer too..", "summary": "Fiancee searching past flings on facebook. Says she's just nosey. I'm supposed to be cool with it. I got angry and now im sleeping on the couch. Am I being too jealous?"}
{"id": "t3_4avjj4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[24 M] have been with my gf [24F] for 2 months, recently found out she is seeing her ex. Seemingly dates.", "post": "This girl ive been seeing has been awesome and ive never had a reason to not trust her. Her ex has been in the picture since I began dating her. Now we are exclusive and she agreed to be my gf. I have been noticing she still gets the odd text/snap from her ex. If were watching tv and shes next to me when she checks her phone i can see his name come up. Im not snooping. She hasnt brought anything up about how he still talks to her. \n\nFast forward to this week, i found out through one of her friends that she was at his house last wednseday getting high and watching some tv. Last Saturday he took her on what seems like a date. Feeding birds and then to a restaurant for supper..", "summary": "gf of 2 months still talking to her ex and going on what seems like dates. Is this a sign to drop her and move on or is there still hope for our relationship. What are others experiences?"}
{"id": "t3_3nsia0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My F(22) family didn't tell me my cousin M(30) was having a baby.", "post": "I come from a small, dysfunctional family. I know every family is dysfunctional in their own ways, but perhaps a little more than most. Anyway, I really only have about 5 relatives. My parents (divorced), and my aunt and uncle and their 2 kids. And my grandpa. \n\nWe're all pretty close and I spend my holidays with them. I live a state away at this point but try and keep in contact. My younger cousin and I are the same age and I consider her like a sister (I'm an only child). We grew up together, spent countless summers together, and even had similar friend groups as we grew older. I try to text her and call her but she rarely responds. Last time I saw her was in December 2014 and it was really fun. We always have a good time together and have good talks but when we're not together she disappears.\n\nI called my aunt last week because there were some pretty big family problems I wanted to talk with her about but no one answered. She called me back tonight and we talked. She dropped the news on speakerphone that my guy cousin was having a baby. In January. It's October, so they've known for quite some time and chose to not tell me. \n\nI acted excited for him and asked a lot of questions, but part of me was so hurt and faking my excitement. I don't understand why they didn't tell me months ago. This is a huge thing to happen in my family (first grandkid) and I just feel left out. I'm pretty removed from my immediate family (have a bad relationship with my mom), so it sucks feeling like the only family I have doesn't care.\n\nI obviously didn't want to make this announcement about me, so I didn't say anything but I'm having a hard time processing it. I've felt distant from them for some time, but I don't understand why the change and how I should proceed moving forward. I don't want to be bitter about it, but I don't want to put in effort if they don't seem to care.\n\nJust mainly venting because I'm sad.", "summary": "My cousin is having a baby in January. No one in my family told me until today. Upset and don't know what their reasoning could be."}
{"id": "t3_3wd3ms", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] am experiencing something confusing towards my roommate [20F]. I've gone from being completely impartial towards her to something I can't explain.", "post": "Hello /r/relationships, I'll try to keep this as short as I can.\n\nThree months ago, I moved into a house in England with three other people from my country, 2 girls and 2 guys (including me). I had little to no attraction to either of the girls, one was too dull to talk to properly, and the other I had little attraction to. For the sake of this story, I'll call her Liz.\n\nAll four of us are on good terms, haven't had many problems or serious rows, so we get along well. Recently (a week or two ago), however, I started to become more and more attracted to Liz - we talked a lot, discussed quite a few things, and I understood why she was the way she was (which is to say a bit unusual, she's a bit strange at times with how she behaves). With that insight into her personality, I realised that although she's not stunningly attractive, I really, really like her. I haven't felt anything like this for a while, and I genuinely don't know what to do, or whether the feeling is mutual. Yesterday we were sat in the kitchen for hours discussing love, relationships, sex, all that, and I wanted to do something right then and there.\n\nI will definitely talk to her about this, but it's a question of timing. She's leaving tomorrow morning - heading back home -, and will be back in just under a month. I don't think that now is the best time to bring this up, seeing as she's getting ready to leave, but I honestly don't know what to do.", "summary": "Moved in with roommate, thought little of her, then recently realised that I have become really attracted to her, but don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1priij", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16F] with my boyfriend [16] - Problems with Arguing", "post": "Me and my boyfriend were together for 4 months before we broke up because we argued too much. It had been 1.5 months since we broke up and I decided to contact him again seeing as I was still madly in love with him and missed him so much. It took a while to 'convince' him that we wouldn't argue any more but eventually we got back together. A few weeks have passed now and we were literally so happy being back together; I thought he'd changed because now we talk more and see each other more and generally have fun. However, sometimes he doesn't speak to me for days on end because he feels I'm 'moody' and doesn't want to 'start an argument' which is fair enough, however he doesn't understand that not speaking to me is one of the reasons I get annoyed and feel unwanted.\n\nAnyway, we started arguing on Halloween and because I was playing hard to get I decided to text saying 'we both need to change otherwise it's not going to work' and he agreed and unfortunately we broke up yet again. I don't want this at all and I have messaged him a lot of times trying to talk to him and sort the argument out- however he doesn't understand and sometimes will not reply. I know he loves me and we both want to be with each other, however sometimes he can be a little too stubborn and will ignore me and not speak to me for long lengths of time. I want to be with him and 'moving on' is not an option. At this moment in time he is still ignoring my methods to talk to him and will not see sense. Is there anything I can do?", "summary": "Boyfriend and me broke up for a while because we argue and now we got back together and are arguing again, need help!"}
{"id": "t3_1m7eqj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24/F] together with fianc\u00e9e [26/M] for 3 years, getting married on Saturday. He isn't excited, and I'm worried.", "post": "My fianc\u00e9e [26/M] and I are getting married on Saturday after dating for over 3 years and being engaged for one. He used to be so affectionate and demonstrative (random love notes, saying how \"lucky\" he is to be with me, hugs for no reason) and as the wedding gets closer, he seems to shut down more and more. He's taking a very active role in the wedding planning, but he doesn't seem to be excited at all about actually getting married. \n\nWe are fairly young, and I want him to be excited about this new and significant step (marriage). What if he's like this when we have our first child? I don't want to be with someone who can't express their joy at life experiences/milestones. I'm just feeling depressed. Is this what I have to look forward to?", "summary": "my fianc\u00e9e is blas\u00e9 about getting married in 4 days, I'm questioning if I can handle that attitude forever."}
{"id": "t3_436vm5", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Starting to question moving my money to a Wells Fargo IRA.", "post": "I have some money from a former employer that was put into a 401k through Fidelity.  Long story short (partly because I'm not sure what the complete story is) the money in the 401k got moved to a cash account and was doing nothing but sitting there, and I want it doing something.\n\nBoth my father and grandfather have accounts with Wells Fargo, plus Wells Fargo has a location in my town with advisers.  So I figured this would be the way to go, I have family that seems to like them, and I can actually go in and talk to someone in person.\n\nAfter a hassle of them seemingly not knowing how to transfer the money from Fidelity, I get to talk to the adviser, and he basically just suggests a mutual fund through American Funds, and seeing that I'm 31 years old recommended an aggressive plan (which is at least one thing that makes sense).  He gives me some pamphlets about American Funds, mentions that payment is a rate of 5.75%, and basically sends me on my way.\n\nIn trying to understand all of this, I came here and started reading through the info provided.  I'm seeing that apparently Vanguard has much better expense ratios and potentially no loads, so I'm starting to think I should get out of Wells Fargo asap.  It's frustrating not entirely knowing what I'm looking at, or where to find information.  Like trying to look on Vanguard's website briefly, and I'm not seeing all fund options, or what ratios or loads they may have.  Same with looking at these American Fund pamphlets.  I just feel like I'm still in the dark.  Then I read on here that investments depend on what your goals are.  My goals?  I don't even know what kind of goals I should be making.\n\nI guess I'm just looking for some advise and more information.  It seems like there's just so much to learn and I can't seem to make any connections yet.", "summary": "Transferred money to a Wells Fargo account, started reading here, now questioning the WF decision.  Still confused and could use advise and more info."}
{"id": "t3_2r84qj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22f] am clueless how to casually date! Tips and advice would be greatly appreciated.", "post": "Like the title says I am a 22f and newly into the dating scene! I am a serial monogamist and I really don't want to be. My last relationship lasted a year and we broke up in November. I feel like I am in a place in my life were I am super busy and not looking to work too hard on a relationship. Don't get me wrong I love to nurture my relationships with my friends but I don't have the energy to deal with romantic relationship problems and heart break. I had a really rough year last year, didn't get into any specialty programs, parents divorced, my dog passed away and my dad got a new girlfriend. Oh and at the end of the year a very painful breakup (loved him dearly, just not compatible in very important was) so basically I'm just looking to be happy and working on being happy.\n\nRight now I am loving my hobby (pole dancing!), working full time and finishing my degree part time. This doesn't really open me up to many opportunities to meet guys. I've been going to meetups every once and awhile but for the event not really for meeting people. \n\nSo reddit, how in the hell do I meet guys without online dating (freaks me out) and without getting into a LTR? I guess also how do I flirt? I'm not super awkward, I am actually pretty outgoing. I am just not really forward or flirty unless the guy is being ultra flirty then I can catch on.", "summary": "girl wants to date around without it turning into a LTR, what the frigging frick do I do? How do I meet guys and flirt?"}
{"id": "t3_52uchc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my boyfriend [21M] of just over a year, recently started constantly fighting, how can we make it work>", "post": "Boyfriend and I started dating in first year of university. We really had a lot of fun together, everything was great until recently.  \n  \nIt just seems like every time we're together now, we'll pick fights with each other. It'll always be about the stupidest things, and afterwards we'll always resolve it, but it's really taken it's toll on our relationship.  \n  \nI know it sounds like we should just break up, but I really want it to work out. Actually he's a really good guy, and we have the same sense of humour, values, and sex is great. I just don't know why recently we can't seem to stand to be with each other.  \n  \nWe both recognize the problem, and have discussed it. Neither of us want to break up or are interested in anyone else, and we really want to fix the issue.  \n  \nI think it's a problem of ego since our arguments are usually I'm right, you're wrong which then goes on to why did you say this, what did you mean when you said that. It's really about the most trivial things, but we don't seem to realize it until after we've fought and hurt each others feelings.  \n    \nHas anyone else experienced the same thing? What did they do to move past it?", "summary": "Boyfriend and I have been getting into arguments about silly things. How can we stop and just enjoy our time with each other?"}
{"id": "t3_lyll7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My Friend is Slowly Being Killed By His Roommate, What Do?", "post": "My friend needs your advice.\n\nFirst off, We are college students at a Tech School in the Pacific Northwest. Our school does not provide dorms so we all have to get our own apartments while we attend.\n\nAt first his roommate, let's call him Bill, was a decent guy, kind of socially awkward, but he did his part and they all got along well. Over the last two years Bill slowly started letting the place go. He stopped washing clothes, he stopped cleaning dishes, he stopped doing nearly everything. He puts food in the fridge and forgets about it, hiding it in the back or in the shelves.\n\nBill has piles of filthy laundry pushed against the wall. Stacks of molding plates, glasses with spoiled milk, bags of month old snacks,   half eaten take out surround his bed. Their apartment smells like a landfill, their windows and door have to stay open to ward off the smell.\n\nAbout three months ago, when semester started again I noticed that my friend, Bob, developed a cough. I figured it was back to school sickness and would go away; it didn't. About three weeks later I took Bob to the urgent care center. They said his cough was caused by some sort of contaminant, that he must have been breathing it for quite some time. And that because of it he had developed a mild Asthma.\n\nFast forward two months, Bob is still coughing, Bill is still living in his filth. Bob wants to kick him out but is afraid that Bill will not be able to find somewhere to go. He wants to torment Bill, to make his life as 'uncomfortable' as possible. Bob's end goal is to make it so Bill decides to move out and saves him the hassle of forcing him out.\n\nHow have you dealt with filthy roommates?\n\nHow do we make his life hell?", "summary": "My friend's roommate is a filthy person, who gave my friend health problems. We need to force him to move out. How have you dealt with people like this?"}
{"id": "t3_1t2plh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a [29 M] with my now ex-gf [30 F] of 8months, we broke up and I can't stop thinking, I let the best thing to happen to me, slip away.", "post": "Me and my now ex had both been very stressed in lite the past few months. I had just gotten laid off and her workload was crazy high.\nShe needs personal space when she is streesed and I need companionship. \nWe couldn't give the other what they needed to help cope.\n\nWe fought a lot. We both wanted to give the other what they needed, but struggled too. This caused even more stress. \nWhen time were good they were amazing though.\n\nThen I screwed up. Booked a flight 3 days before her 30th birthday. Simple missreading of my calander. When I tried to correct the mistake she wouldn't let me. Saying the damage was done. and it wouldnt mean the same even if i did re book it.\nThen we decided to end it. Nether wanted to but we both thought we should.\n\nSince, I can't stop thinking about her. Today was her birthday and all I wanted was to be with her. i miss her smile and laugh and company so much.\n\nAm i deluding myself? Can something work when our needs are so different?\nI feel like we gave up. Didn't try enough... But I also don't want to hurt her any more and cause her stress with my actions and needs. We are working on still being friends. If I ask to give it another try am I being selfish?", "summary": "we broke up because we had different needs but I think it was a mistake. Can you make different needs during times of stress work?"}
{"id": "t3_203ykh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20/F] cheating on my [20 M] 3 year relationship, he cheated first, is it okay?", "post": "I have been on and off with my boyfriend for 3 years. he was my first. He has sort of the bad boy personality because he grew up with a pretty rough life. Last year we went through some really rough patches (fighting/jealousy) and he had sex with 3 girls while we were on and off. \n\nSince then, he went to rehab for 3 months and has really cleaned up his life for me. I think being with those other girls made him appreciate me. \n\nHowever, I used his cheating as an excuse for myself to cheat. I had never been with anyone besides him, but now I have been with 3 other people besides him. I never told him about my indiscretions. I know that if I tell him, he will likely cut me out of his life forever and never trust me again. He is not emotionally mature enough to handle the truth. Even though he cheated on me first, I have an insane amount of guilt on my shoulders. I don't know if I should tell him and lose him forever, or keep this my little secret. Either way, I know the truth always comes out eventually... Should I tell him?", "summary": "My boyfriend cheated on me first, I cheated back but didn't tell him. The guilt is driving me crazy, but if I tell him I might lose him forever. "}
{"id": "t3_1ko95h", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Integrating a New Dog", "post": "I have a 2 year old Shiba Inu male. We recently offered to foster a 2 year old pit female. They are around the same size, although she outweighs him (even though shes a tad underweight). After a rough start (he snapped and growled at her when meeting) they seem to be playing.\n\nHowever there are some behaviors she exhibits that have me concerned. When playing he likes to be chased and she will chase. Usually she will stop when he turns on her and stand there staring. Sometimes however she will start jumping on him, trying to roll him and then force him down and when he starts snapping she will growl. At this point I will break it up.\n\nShe will also follow him everywhere and sometimes try to put her head on his back. He will snap at her when she does this.\n\nIs there something I can do to help them play better together?", "summary": "Foster pit is alpha rolling my dog and it starts to escalate. What can I do to make them play better together?"}
{"id": "t3_2lqx5p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my boyfriend [21 M] of 2 \u00bd years, not sure if I should be worried about weird FB post...", "post": "Okay, so my boyfriend tells me he is ping away for a week with his family to a remote location where there is no cell service or wifi so he won't be able to talk to me until he gets back. This is totally fine with me because we only see each other every couple days as it is and we aren't constantly talking to each other anyway. However, I was  on Facebook after he had left on his trip and a friend of his who lives near me posted a picture of him at a party with her. Considering he's supposed to be in the middle of nowhere, I'm a little confused? Our relationship is pretty solid and I like to think if he just wanted to go party or something without me or if he needed space that he'd just say so but now I'm not so sure? Should I ask him about this Facebook post? Thanks for any advice in advance :)", "summary": "boyfriend says he's going to be out of town but strange FB post says otherwise. Should I ask my boyfriend about it?"}
{"id": "t3_44gcw6", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by riding a bike with a broken seat that almost cut my balls off", "post": "I was 9 years old and during a time my brother used to take me with him to spend the afternoon at his friend's house. There was this guy who had a house with a big ramp that goes to the garage (which was also the main floor of the house).We would ride a bike as fast as we could all the way down the ramp until the front tire hits a wall (not very clever I know, it was hell fun tho).  \nIt turns that we only had this old bike with a broken seat - it didn't have anything covering it up, so the three tiny irons that work as the structure were exposed.\nAfter riding the ramp a couple times I noticed that something went wrong. At that moment, I only noticed a small cut on my thigh. But I started to feeling that there was *something else* . I was afraid of finding out what actually happened and I was feeling really embarrassed to ask for help (I thought my brother's friends would make fun of me or something). So I stayed behind a small wall near the gate while they were playing on the street (I didn't have a plan, I don't know what I was doing lol). Then a neighbor sees me there, hiding and crying. She immediately tells my brother about it, I don't say what is going on so he takes me home. Once mom gets home I have to tell her. When she looks at it she got desperate and 30 min later I am at the emergency room getting 9 stitches on my scrotum. \nI got a Y-shape scar.", "summary": "I was riding a bike with a broken seat all the way down a big ramp. I hit the wall and the seat cuts my sac. I got 9 stitches on it."}
{"id": "t3_14t80l", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[17M] Apprentice at small company, not a lot of social leads", "post": "Hello!\n\nI am a 17 y/o who lives in the UK and work as a web designer for a small company (10-15 people). Naturally there's not really anything going for me at the office and I would really like to meet some girls my own age.\n\nI had two relationships at school, the first lasting about 18 months each and I got dumped the first time (I still think about her a lot) and the second about 2 months, however I broke it off due to me missing my ex a lot.\n\nI find it extremely hard to talk to people my own age, but find it easy to talk to adults that I've never met before, I don't really want to date an immature girl and would love to meet a geeky girl as I'm a geeky guy. \n\nI want to know how I can create a means to meet people my age, but hopefully more intelligent and mature girls, not the chavvy girls who seem to live near me.", "summary": "Geeky 17 y/o wants to know how to meet mature, intelligent girls his age, don't go to school so that avenue is non existant."}
{"id": "t3_mt7d7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is a good thing to bring to a friend in the Intensive Care Unit?", "post": "Heya, about 2 weeks ago a good friend of mine was involved in a motorcycle accident that left him in critical condition with many broken bones and brain damage.  His condition has improved enough that his family has OKed (and encouraged) other visitors.  We aren't sure which part(s) of his brain have been affected (if there is any long-term damage), but here's what I do know:\n\n* He is able to breath without a ventilator, and is using a mask.\n* He is not paralyzed, but at the moment is still experiencing limited movement to his left side.\n* He is able to squeeze your hand.\n* He is able to make eye contact, although his eyes generally aren't open for more than a few hours a day.\n* He has laughed at some conversations the family has had around him, and tries to speak but is not speaking coherently... it does seem that he understands what people are saying, though.\n* He is able to sit upright.\n\nHe is moving from the ICU to the neuro department within the week, but it looks like he will be staying in the hospital for at least the next several weeks.\n\nHave any of you been in the ICU yourself, or have had a family or friend in the ICU?  How did you help them pass the time, or feel cared for, or missed?  I want to be careful not to bring anything he can't interact with at this time.", "summary": "My friend is in the ICU and I want him to feel loved - any ideas for a little something to bring to him to help pass the time? "}
{"id": "t3_15tmw9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My wife [23] threatened to leave me [21] a few months ago. After 3 years of marriage and a daughter.", "post": "She said \"I can't take this bickering anymore\" and told me to find somewhere to be. \n\nWe talked and she said I'm too clingy and jealous of our roommate [22] who is lesbian and only wants my wife and doesnt hide that fact. She spends all her free time with said roommate ( or so I feel) and screams at me at the smallest thing. The roommate is her best (and ONLY) friend she has who lives in our area code and they do nothing but air at the house and RP(roleplay) characters they created on IM \n\n She said she wants to try again with us and apparently didn't think breaking it off meant divorce or that I would want nothing to do with her besides our daughter. \n\nShe doesn't work and and my paranoia has me thinking the only reason she took it all back is because of the fact I am the primary income, our roommate refuses to pay more the 150 which isn't even 1/4 of our bills\n\nThe sex is gone, we rarely do anything together. It all started going down hill after the birth of our daughter, I don't blame her for the sex issue because I honestly beleive it is the birth control \"implanon\"\n\nI am a good father\n and only wants what's best for my daughter...I fear the best would be our divorce.\n\n..as we speak she is in another state for the week with roommate visiting roommates family...any advice?", "summary": "I feel my wife doesn't want to be with me and is only with me for the support I provide and can't face the pain of divorce"}
{"id": "t3_2phesd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24/F] with my fiance [27/M] of 5 years, how do I start over?", "post": "My fiance and I have been together for 5 years, engaged for 2, and living together for 2.5 years. We've had a lot of problems and are currently trying to work things out. We're both in individual therapy and couples therapy. \n\nWe've talked about giving ourselves one more year to figure things out (this was over this past summer). In the last 6 months I've come to realize that we aren't really compatible as partners and are looking for different things in life. We've talked about this and what it would mean to go our separate ways. \n\nWhat I'm wondering is how do you even start over after 5 years? This is my first serious relationship and the first time I've lived with someone other than my parents. I guess I'm just looking for similar stories and advice on restarting. Thanks in advance!", "summary": "Fiance and I are trying to fix our relationship but it's becoming more evident that we're not compatible, have already talked about an amicable breakup if things don't get better, and wondering how to start over."}
{"id": "t3_wud43", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by pissing on myself at work.", "post": "So I had a pretty hard day at work.  I babysit insane old folk, and the one today was a nightmare.  I had been holding in my pee for several hours before having an opportunity to use the restroom.  At this point, I'm tired and have a headache and just want to go eat something, so I'm running my piss break on autopilot.  My stomach is cramping from holding it in so long.  After pissing a minute, I think I'm finished, so I stand up to wipe, and then a surprise extra squirt of pee comes out.  It catches on my thigh and dribbles down my leg, soaking the upper part of my pants.\n\nI had no spare pants, and had to walk around for four more hours after that, smelling like piss.  I wiped some liquid soap on it, hoping to mask the scent, and pulled my shirt down as far as possible.  Luckily, if anyone smelled anything, they'd just think it was the lady I was sitting and not me.", "summary": "was too hasty taking a piss, and got it all over my pants.  Had to walk around in piss pants for hours."}
{"id": "t3_2be5c1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] broke up with my girlfriend [18 M] and I feel extremely guilty because she can't let go", "post": "This is my first relationship, so all the things about breakups that I know of are entirely from asking around or reading up on it. I have no first hand experience.\n\nI broke up with my girlfriend stating very plainly that although I still loved her very much, I couldn't see a future for us and I didn't want to prolong our relationship because every passing day will only make the inevitable separation that much worse.\n\nShe's a romantic, and told me during the breakup that while she wasn't going to stop me, she believed that there is only one special person for every person out there, and I was that for her. I know this is probably her youth talking, but knowing her, she takes the stuff she says way more seriously than the average girl. \n\nI'm afraid she'll take it very hard and her process of recovery will be much longer than it should be. Hell, I'm afraid she might never actually let this go. I don't know.\n\nI feel extremely guilty because she's begged me to come back since, and I told her a straight out no, because I didn't think the relationship would last long after this. It's only been a few days, and I'd say I've made significant progress recovering (it's been very tough though), but she hasn't turned up to school or spoken to many people. She only confided in a couple of friends and bawled her eyes out at them.\n\nMy friends told me that most breakups are one-sided anyway and it was inevitable that I'd be the asshole in the situation. But that's not really what I care about. How do I handle this? She still very much expects that somehow sometime I'll be running back to her. I've made my decision and I'm adamant that I won't, so how do I help her find \"closure\" without destroying her completely?", "summary": "My ex-girlfriend won't let go of me even though I explicitly stated my intention was to move on, and I feel responsible for everything."}
{"id": "t3_437w3w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31 M] with my Girlfriend [28 F] being distant. I am using no contact..how long to wait?", "post": "Recently the good morning and good night texts started to disappear but when she does its \"Goodnight babe (kiss face)\". Girlfriend being distant and not texting back on a couple occasions. \n\nNot sure what's going on, maybe I'm coming off to needy lately. \n\nLast time I texted she told me she was super busy with work. I told her to text me when she is free and wants to hang out. \n\nHavent heard from her all week. Nothing at all. \n\nLast we texted, she was still using the word \"Babe\" in texts. \n\nIts Friday tomorrow, should I keep the no contact rule, if so how long, or should I text her and say something like:\n\n\"What happened to my beautiful amazing girlfriend who use to texted me all the time? Everything alright over there baby?\" \n\nOr \n\n\"Hey your week get better?\"\n\nIf she wants to break up, well fine, whatever, I like her but I don't like being in limbo, but how should I approach this?", "summary": "Girlfriend being distant, how long with no contact, when should I contact if she doesn't contact back and how should I approach it."}
{"id": "t3_2zzn76", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Without my [20M] knowledge, my girlfriend [20F] opened up to my sister [32F] that she had an abortion, knowing that my sister has miscarried.", "post": "My girlfriend of one year (who has only met my sister once) had recently started messaging her about some personal topics. She eventually told her that she had an abortion. \nMy sister had a miscarriage late into one of her pregnancies that hit our family hard. I was only young at the time and I know I've never been able to recover from it. However my sister has understandably always had a problem with abortion since.\n\nIt's hard to talk about so I haven't told my girlfriend directly about it, but she did know that I lost my nephew.\n\nYet of all of the things to say to my sister. I only learnt from my mother today after she managed to find out why my sister wasn't fond of my girlfriend anymore. \nApparently after that message my sister told her to no longer talk to her.\n\nI'm conflicted between my girlfriend who I do love, and my sister who I've always been close with.", "summary": "My gf told my sis that she had an abortion knowing that my sis had a miscarriage and is very anti abortion."}
{"id": "t3_2q69hg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [23f] am thinking about my relationship with my boyfriend [26m] after he said some hurtful words. What should I do?", "post": "I'm on my mobile, It's hard to write a lot without having to autocorrect everything. So long story short. My boyfriend and I had an argument and we takes briefly in between. However, I asked him why did just called me and did not meet me in person to talk. I went beck home to moms house and I expected him to show up to moms house, flowers or not, to apologize. He said he has too much work to do and his.job needs him more and that I should have come to him! Even though we are both working. I then asked if I went missing for a week, would he come after me or call me? He said no because it was my choice? Even after a month, he said he would not come after me!! This is what broke me down. Basically, if I just up and left, he would do nothing!! This sounds so wrong and I'm hurt. Does this make sense?", "summary": "Boyfriend, 26m,  said hurtful words to me, 24f, and now I'm not sure what to do? We have been dating for 2 years and living together for a year"}
{"id": "t3_531h6p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F20] have never dated or kissed someone and feel like an outcast", "post": "I don't know if this is normal. It doesn't seem normal. I have never dated or kissed someone and I feel like an outcast. Most my girl friends have done a lot of things and here I am, done absolutely nothing.\n\nI should probably approach guys much more, but I'm scared and insecure. I know that I'm plain average or ugly, so not many guys are interested. I never get approached by guys while many of my friends are approached whenever we are out. I remember being younger and out with my friends they all got to talk with guys while I was sitting there for myself and no guy would ever talk to me.\n\nI know that I have to suck up and realize the genetics didn't work in my favor. I'm an average looking girl. It's so hard to accept though.", "summary": "I have never dated or kissed someone and feel like an outcast. Never approached by anyone, doesn't approach anyone because I'm average in appearance."}
{"id": "t3_2es5j5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my girlfriend [20 F] of 2 months, and parents are disapproving due to religion and distance and asked to end it.", "post": "So I recently broke up with my girlfriend of two months. We are currently in a semi-long distance relationship (1 hour away) because she goes to school in LA (her hometown is 6 hours away from me). I drive to visit once a week and my mom was starting to get a little angry because she says it's a waste of gas and I should only visit her once every 2 weeks.\n\nIn addition, my parents had two conditions for me to stay with her (1. She converts to Catholicism and 2. She agrees to move to southern California if we get married). Now my mother told me that I had to ask this right away before things get hard on me later. \n\nI personally don't care if she converts or not because I respect her own beliefs and I know that she respects mine. However, I really love my family and it made my mom sad at the thought of me possibly moving far away from her in the future and that she is of a different religion. I know that she is scared that I will get hurt because a long distance relationship is pretty risky but I really love this girl. My gf is really easy to talk to and really makes me happy. I have never met someone that clicks with me like her and I know that she feels the same way. The thought of us ending without closure makes me sad and I do not want to give up. \n\nMy gf said that she does not want to convert and that she does not want to be tied down on where to live in the future. She believes in just seeing where life takes her. \n\nI know my mom will get over the religion thing but I do not know how she will handle me possibly leaving my hometown in the future. I really do not want to end this relationship but at the same time I am scared because my parents will be disappointed in me if it messes up and I get hurt. \n\nI guess I am asking for some advice... Should I keep trying this relationship out and see what happens? Or should I just give up and move on.", "summary": "Parents made me break up with girlfriend due to long distance and having a different religion from me. Want advice on whether I should just try it out anyways."}
{"id": "t3_3jy57r", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by Making a Girl Trip as She Tried To Return a Bag of Chips", "post": "This story took place two years ago, a couple of months after the bike incident I had with another girl. This girl was just a friend. Being the immature teenage boy I was, I teased this girl. I remember meeting her and talking to her for a little while at an Interact service (A community service club in my high school). After a week or two with us going about our lives, I was walking down the hallway and she just saw me holding my bag of chips and was like \"You owe me chips,\" as a friendly gesture.\n\nAgain, me being the immature guy I was, I played along with it. Whenever I saw her in the hallway, I would be like \"You owe me chips!\" and she would say \"No, you owe me chips wtf.\" One day after school, I started doing this in front of her friends and embarrassed her. She thought I was just being funny and enjoyed it. One day, I bought myself a couple bags of chips and I tried giving one to her, but she rejected. Although I was pretty persistant about giving it to her, she still said no. Now that I think about it, even though she said no playfully, I now know that she was getting pretty damn annoyed.\n\nThe next day during lunch time, I walked by her table and threw the bag onto her lap. I kid you not, this girl got up and started booking it to me with the intention of trying to give it back to me, so I went along with it and started a chase. After maybe like 50 feet, I hear a slam on the ground. I look back and I saw that she ate shit, in front of 70+ other people. Her three-week old phone cracked, elbow scrapped, knee bleeding. Yeah, it was a pretty bad fall.\n\nI walked her to the nurse's office, embarrassed as hell and expecting her to yell the shit out of me, but she didn't, thankfully. I helped her clean up her wounds, bandaged them, and apologized. Since then, she hasn't said a word to me and just ignored me when she saw me. I had no game in high school as you can tell by my previous posts.", "summary": "Girl tripped and ate shit as I tried running away from her as she tried to return me a bag of chips. High school was a time of immaturity and innocence."}
{"id": "t3_t60nv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend says it's a red flag if I have any friends who I *might have dated had I never met her*", "post": "M27, F25. The title basically sums it up. We've been dating 5 months. I care about my girlfriend (\"Jane\") a lot, but I'm exhausted by how jealous she can be sometimes. \n\nI would say that 70% of my friends are girls, but my two closest friends are guys. The other day, Jane and I were together and a friend of mine walked by. I said hi to her like I do with all my friends, but later Jane said that my face \"lit up\" when I saw her and that I was obviously attracted to her. I denied being attracted to the friend (I am not) and tried to change the subject because this conversation has never ended well. \n\nShe started a line of questioning.\n\nJane: In a hypothetical universe where you had never met me, would you have dated \"friend?\"\n\nMe: No.\n\nJane: But you obviously think she's pretty.\n\nMe: Why does this matter? There are lots of pretty people in the world.\n\nJane: So you do think she's pretty.\n\nMe: Do you think she's pretty?\n\nJane: Yes.\n\nMe: Fine, she's pretty.\n\nJane: So you're attracted to her.\n\nMe: No, please don't put words in my mouth.\n\nJane: Obviously you'd date her, and that's not okay with me.\n\netc...\n\nI've never cheated on her nor would I. At the moment I don't see how these hypothetical scenarios could ever be good for a relationship. At the same time, I want to be sensitive to Jane's feelings. \n\nI have told her how I feel about this.", "summary": "Girlfriend isn't comfortable with me being friends with attractive people. I am friendly but trustworthy and the questioning and suspicion is wearing on my patience."}
{"id": "t3_1f1hoa", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/m] 4 year relationship with poor physical attraction to partner (21/f). Attracted to others.", "post": "My girlfriend and I are both 22 and have been together 4 years. We go to different colleges and it has taken its toll on our relationship. We're in the process of applying to medical school and the idea that we might be very far apart come summer 2014 is scary. There is still love in our relationship and we deeply enjoy each other's company, but the sexual aspect/physical attraction is much weaker than in the past. The lack of sexual attraction (for me) is due to significant weight gain on her part. Long story short: We were both VERY fit. She gained weight (from birth control and less exercise) and I have stayed relatively fit. Despite gently discussing the lack of attraction, she has kept the weight. At this point, the relationship feels very much like a friendship with mostly unsatisfying sexual encounters (for ~3 years). We care for each other, but the passion seems absent and we are worried about the future.\n \n*Enter attractive friend*. Since the sexual aspect has been poor for awhile, I have become increasingly drawn to other women. I have never and will never cheat, but the physical attraction to my friend has become much greater than with my girlfriend. I can resist her (she is also attracted to me), but I just feel physically unsatisfied. \n\nI feel like a douchebag for being interested in another girl, but I have also been clear with my friend that I will never cheat. That is understood and she has not tried to make any further moves on me. We are considering \"taking a break\" for a month to see how unbearable it would be to be apart. I feel confused about my attraction to my friend and lack thereof (but love) for partner.\n\n**Another detail:** I basically had a girlfriend for 3 years, was single for two months, and went into this relationship (again, 4 years).", "summary": "4 year rela with poor physical attraction and future problems. Attracted to other girl. What might help? Month apart? See other people? What do?"}
{"id": "t3_2omk4d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "22F here. Boyfriend 36M is the sweetest most caring guy ever but is somewhat insecure. Is this normal?", "post": "The problem is: \n\nHe has trust issues. He says he trusts me, but that he doesn't trust the guys around me. And although he trusts I won't cheat on him, his qualm is that I like any type of attention I can get from guys. I'm around more people more than he is because I'm still in college and yes, I do get attention from college aged guys at work, school, social media etc. \n\nHe's particularly jealous of a co worker in his 20s who happens to be really fit and my math buddy whom I study with sometimes. Last week, when I studied with my math buddy he kept asking me several questions about our hang out and I became annoyed to the point at which I told him that if he didn't trust me he was going to ruin the relationship. \n\nI also told him I had looked up articles and was starting to wonder if this was a red flag trait of a toxic relationship. He then told me he wanted to trust me and he wanted to work on his trust issues and to be supportive of him. I did reassure him and say I wouldn't trade him for any of these guys because he is special to me. He does however, admit he has these trust issues and is willing to work on it.", "summary": "Boyfriend has trust issues. At what point do trust issues cease to become normal and is a RED FLAG sign of a controlling relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_2sr1nq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by giving an orgasm to my gf", "post": "This FU didn't happen today but it's not like the title says otherwise. Anyway it was last summer.\nMy girlfriend had recently moved in with me, like, a month before this story happened. It was a nice Sunday, so no work. Plus, it was my birthday. If you do the math, (sunday+birthday+just-moved-in girlfriend) you can see why I was expecting some sex.\nSo when I heard \"Happy Birthday\" and I saw my girlfriend with a really naughty lingerie, I was pretty happy. Anyway, we get going. It was the best sex we had ever had. I saw she was about to have an orgasm, so I started going faster. When she reached the climax, one of her leg started shaking. I'm not gonna lie, it was really hot and I felt like the god of sex. I was basking in my abilities, when all of a sudden \n\n**\"MEEEEEOOOOOOOW\"**\n\nIt was incredibly loud and it scared the crap out of us. Apparently my gf had kicked over a lamp with her leg, and that cockblocker of our cat decided *that* was the perfect time to crawl out the bedstand he was hiding under. The falling lamp knocked him out. He wasn't moving at all, so we got up and started dressing. While my gf called the vet (who thankfully is a close friend and lives quite near), I checked the cat: i could feel his pulse, so I put him in his transport cage and then we rushed to the car.\nHalfway there, and, thank God, the little bastard woke up with the cutest meow.\nWe arrived at our friend who checked him and reassured us everything was okay. My girlfriend spent the rest of the day hugging the cat and crying. Since then, before having sex I have to search for the cat and lock him out of the room, which can kinda kill the mood", "summary": "gave orgasm to gf, almost killed a cat, got blueballed on my birthday, now I have to find a pussy if I want to have sex"}
{"id": "t3_d2zb8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit:  How many of you know a completely illiterate person who functions in society?", "post": "A little background:\n\nI work at a cast-iron foundry in N.E. Ohio, and for those of you who don't know, foundry work is some of the dirtiest, nastiest, toughest work around.  10 hour days are the minimum around here, and guys routinely log 60+hours a week like it's no big deal.  We've got one crew who averages 13.5, 6 days a week.  If it's 90 degrees outside, it's 140 next to the metal.\n\nAnyway, it recently came to my attention that one of the guys around here is illiterate.  Straight up, can't read or write.  He rides his bicycle about 18 miles (one-way) to get to work if he can't find a ride.  He's in his early 50's, prepares molds for finishing, and drinks a case of PBR every single night.  That's ALL I know about this dude.\n\nSo I got to thinking:  How the hell does he survive?  So much of society today depends on basic reading and writing skills.  I don't want to ask him because I think it'd be a phenomenally rude thing to do, and in my experience people that can't read or write get pretty defensive about it.\n\nI'm over the fact that he never picked up these skills earlier in life.  Whether he's stupid/lazy, has a learning disability, or just had a set of circumstances that prevented him from getting this basic education.  I've put that from my mind and am now just trying to wrap my head around how he operates in the world.\n\nHow do people like this sign a lease?  Buy things in stores?  Manage money? Navigate to a new place? \n\nNow, immigrants who don't speak English and mentally challenged people are a different case. Usually they've got a support network to fall back on, or someone to watch over them.  As far as I know, this dude is on his own.\n\nSo Reddit, any insight, or anecdotes about people you know in the same situation?", "summary": "I know a dude at work who can't fucking read or write.  How does he survive in the real world on his own?"}
{"id": "t3_gnoxt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What in your boyfriend's or girlfriend's sexual history makes you uncomfortable?", "post": "So I recently started dating a girl that I like a lot, and for the most part everything's going great.  The other night we had the 'dating history' talk that seems to pop up when relationships start getting serious.  After I briefed her on my (admittedly meager) tally of sexual partners, I expected to hear something close to my own experience (she's 21).  Instead she dropped a number that I didn't expect, given what I know about her.  Not quite double-digits but on the margins.  I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since, and it's driving me crazy.  It's not an extremely high number and I like to think I'm open-minded about sex, but the fact that this has been consuming me makes me realize how many hang-ups I still have.\n\nSo, Reddit, what in your partner's sexual/dating history makes you uncomfortable or upset?  How did you manage to get past it?  And has anyone been in a relationship where you've lived in blissful ignorance of your partner's past?", "summary": "Girlfriend has been with more guys than I anticipated, and it has mind-fucked me.  What in your SO's sexual past makes you uncomfortable?"}
{"id": "t3_1gdlw8", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "I have read the FAQ, but I still have no idea what I am doing. Sorry for the stupid questions!", "post": "Just wanted to say sorry again for wasting your time helping me out! I know I'm probably blind or something. >.<\n\nI read the FAQ, and I was able to do some of the things to get started but many of the things I am still confused on. I was able to calculate my BMR (By the way is there one calculator that is better than the others? I got a few different numbers.) However, when I went to the link on the FAQ to calculate my BF%, the page was gone. Is this necessary? However, I know even without my BF% that I would be classified as \"skinny fat\" at 5'9 and 156 pounds with a decent layer of fat.\n\nThe next part I am confused on is diet. Most of the provided resources provide diets to try don't seem like they would lend themselves well to everyday/lifetime eating. I don't know how to eat healthy. The last time I tried to truly get in good shape I did it all wrong. I'm talking eating only 800-900 calories a day, counting obsessively, cutting out all my favorite foods, and interspersed with bouts of binging on aforementioned foods. Today, counting calories freaks me out because I fear that I will go back to that. \n\nI am trying to get into real fitness, like going to a gym or bodyweight fitness, but I cannot afford a gym membership and I can't seem to find something study enough to use as a pullup bar for bodyweight. What are my other options because I do want to build muscle.\n\nMy final question is that I have no idea what I am truly aiming for. I want to lose my layer of fat and build muscle, but I am not sure if there's a goal weight involved or what sort of time table I am looking at or how many calories I would need to eat. This brings us full circle as I restate that I have no idea what I am doing.", "summary": "Not sure how to even sort of begin other than showing up here. Need loads of questions answered that I couldn't seem to find. Sorry for the inconvenience!"}
{"id": "t3_49mdkl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [33 M] with my wife [31 F] 7 years, can't find happiness in our relationship", "post": "To start, I love my wife and want her to be happy, but I am not.  We have a son, who is honestly the reason we got married, that we both love dearly.  We were living together for two years before we married, but at the time I was dealing with real self confidence issues.\n\nWhen we got together I was barely making 40k a year, which is pretty respectable in hindsight for a mid-20's single Midwesterner.  However I poured myself into my studies and work and now have a master's and make over three times that.\n\nThe issue I have with our relationship is while I am driven and always looking for something new to learn, she is the opposite of that.  I've attempted several times over the years to get her back to school (she dropped out before she met me) or to get a job (hasn't had once since being with me), or to get involved in the community, she refuses.  She says she has no interest in those things.  She is constantly asking and dreaming of travel, new places to eat, and constantly fills our families weekends with so many activities I don't have time to do the chores she hasn't done.\n\nTo make matters worse, she really has no interest in sex since our son was born.  She's so afraid of another child that it's destroyed her libido.  I've tried to talk to her, ask her what she wants, what would make her comfortable, but all I ever get is \"I'm just not interested anymore\".\n\nI'm not perfect, I try to be patient with all of this, but I do end up angry because I feel resentful of how relatively easy she has life compared to the hours and sacrifice I put in to provide everything.\n\nSo the question is this: Am I really a horrible person for wanting to get a divorce?", "summary": "Two people whom probably don't belong together had a kid and got married.  One became successful and wants to leave the complacent one despite still loving them.  Wants to try to resolve the heaping guilt."}
{"id": "t3_34vs0e", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by Pretending to like a girl I didn't have a crush on", "post": "Throwaway account for reasons Im about to explain..\nLike other TIFU posts, This happened to me about a month ago now.\n\nI'm a pretty quiet guy, usually sits with some classmates from the same program in the resource center and always have a friend who tries to talk me into contributing to the conversational talks. Now here's where the TIFU comes in, the people at the table were talking about who they liked, had a recent crush on etc. For some reason I got it in my head to tell them I had a crush on someone (I didn't actually, I just wanted to contribute to the talks ._.) I tell them I liked, let's call her 'Amy' in the other stream of our program, who I think is actually a really cool,sweet girl,sociable,friendly and she even sits with us most of the time for lunch, except today. Everyone at the table is shocked that I liked someone, even more surprising that it was a girl (They were under the impression I was..like 'THAT' I'm not.) I end up having to ask Amy out for a coffee. (Here's where the SECOND FU comes in) I asked THROUGH FACEBOOK CHAT with everyone looking over my shoulder to make sure I HAD asked her, It becomes marked as 'READ' as they're eagerly awaiting a reply..Minutes pass and my friend 'Lisa's\" phone immediately goes off a few minutes later, it's 'Amy' texting her that I had just asked her to go for coffee. Amy immediately tells Lisa she only thinks of me as a friend, to which Lisa read the text out-loud at our table and everyone sat down from the awkward quietness after which I'm sitting in my seat in embarrassment as everyone tries to feel sorry me for about the outright rejection.\n\nThe next day, Im walking to a morning class and bumped into her in the hallway and failed to realize ahead of time how awkward I made things since we sit at the same table because we were like deer caught in the headlights. I went through the last two weeks of the semester avoiding her after this. (we used to just wave or say hi).", "summary": "Tried to contribute to a conversation with classmates, Told them I liked a girl I didn't actually like and got rejected by said girl all at the same time, made things awkward with said girl."}
{"id": "t3_22yzuj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] On the first date of my life [24/F.] What's a realistic goal for me on the first date?", "post": "Obviously, I will be learning more about her. I work with her, so I've learned a few things about her already. Anything worth discussing with her?\n\nWe are going to eat at pretty decent restaurant, I am expected to pay for our meals correct? How about picking her up from her house? How should I present myself, dress casual?\n\nWhere do I go from there, after the first date? At what point should a woman meet my friends? My friends go to movies, restaurants, and bars pretty often. We like to get together and socialize as much as we can.", "summary": "Going on the first date of my life, not really sure about how to go about dating women. Of course I've had women as friends, but none that I've dated."}
{"id": "t3_3czw8z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Did I [24/F] miss an opportunity [24/M]?", "post": "So I met a guy in this city that I moved to for college, I find him EXTREMELY attractive physically, and VERY attractive personality wise, though his political views are opposite mine and he's a little less mature than I usually go for. When he first gave me his number we texted A LOT, mostly because I kind of thought we were flirting, but later he said he was like that with all his friends. I said it was fine because he ships out for USMC boot camp in January and I've been there done that with marines. We've spent some time together since then and I've decided I like him, but it seems like he's just not really interested in anyone at the moment (except for MAYBE his ex). So now I'm moving back to my hometown and I'm just wondering if I missed an opportunity, if there ever was an opportunity, or if I haven't passed the point of \"fuck it, ask him out, see what happens.\"", "summary": "Should I just ask out this guy I like who seems kind of uninterested or just leave it since we're both leaving town soon anyways?"}
{"id": "t3_2ftwd7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My(20f) boyfriend (20m) of four years is great when we're together, but we are long distance now and it doesn't feel worth it. Help!", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend for four years and when we're together I'm very happy. We've gone through a lot together and he's really great.\n\nWe are now doing long distance, he moved to Virginia, I'm currently studying abroad, but go back to our home state Oregon in a few months. He is incredibly busy, can barely make time for a phone call let alone Skype. He keeps piling on more activities, so it'll only get worse. He doesn't show affection whatsoever unless we're together and he can do so physically. \n\nI feel as though I don't have a boyfriend at all, really, and we'll be in this type of situation for at least 2 more years, but I love him so much. What do I do?", "summary": "I love my boyfriend, he's great when we're in the same city/state, but we are now really long distance and he's very absent/busy."}
{"id": "t3_4n83y4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23/M] estranged grandmother [70s/F] wants to reconnect", "post": "I am the legal guardian of my cousin [10/M]. We were both abused by my uncle/his father, who is currently in prison far away from us, and his mother signed over her rights to me. I've been Cousin's guardian for two years now, and we're doing well.\n\nRecently, our grandmother (uncle's mother) has tried to get into contact with us again. I cut off a huge swathe of my family during the trial \u2013 essentially everyone who was not explicitly on our side \u2013 and my grandmother was part of that. Grandmother wants to make amends for her \"ambivalence,\" and that she is not talking to my uncle.\n\nCousin loves Grandmother and was upset when I cut contact with her, even when I explained the situation, and I want to do right by him. But I do not trust her at all. If my uncle even finds out a smidge of information about Cousin, I will not be responsible for my actions. We do not live in a state with grandparent visitation rights, so I am not worried about legal repercussions, but I don't know how to approach anyone on that side of the family.", "summary": "Gained legal guardianship of my cousin because my uncle was abusive. My grandmother, who cousin loves, wants to reconnect but I do not trust her."}
{"id": "t3_395v70", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I've [24F] ruined my friendship with [23M]. I don't know what to do", "post": "**Background**: we were friends for a long time and talked a ton, every day. Things started to get romantic between us, he was very enthusiastic but often got sad about us being in different cities. Then certain circumstances come up, making it so our long distance situation is extending -- so he put our relationship \"on hold\" until we're near each other again. \n\nI asked if we could just have fun this summer instead of being so serious about everything; he said he doesn't want just fun and wants something more long term with me, but knows him and long distance are a recipe for disaster. Okay, fine! I ask if our friendship will be okay. He's all \"I'M fine with continuing to be friends... do YOU think you'll be okay with being friends? *I* still want you in my life but if you can't do it that's okay.\" Reddit, I'm really good about moving on from romantic situations and I assured him that I just wanted our friendship to be back to normal. But...\n\n**Current issue**: After we decided to put the romantic part on hold he said that our friendship would be just fine, but it's been the opposite. I tried to act as if the whole situation never happened but would get either one word or no responses to our usual platonic texts -- even if he was the one initiating the conversation. I gave in and asked twice if everything was okay, but he snapped both times saying he doesn't want to talk about it even if I do, and that he's fine. But things don't seem fine at all! Am I nuts?", "summary": "Is it possible to salvage a friendship after it has crossed romantic boundaries? Should I just drop contact with him for awhile?"}
{"id": "t3_2xr5rq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By Taking Drugs at Work", "post": "So, I pulled a total bonehead maneuver today. Background: I take pills daily for blood pressure, cholesterol, acid reflux and Parkinson's. Most of them I take around 5, after I'm home from work. Two of the Parkinson's I have to also take when I wake up at 5, then at 9 and 1. Usually, I fill up the Pill daily box on Sunday night. But I was feeling lazy and I had missed the evening of Saturday and the afternoon of Sunday, so I had two doses ready to go. I figured I'd take the morning dose from one of those and refill for today, then do the whole week tonight. So, I'm up at 5 but not awake. I take the morning dose fine, but when I went to fill up for the missing daily does for today, I find a bottle of carbo/levo in the Target bottle.\nSo wait, there's more setup. Target fills the prescription with non-generic but I have switched to the mail pharmacy my health plan likes cause I get three months for the price of one. The Target bottle pill is smaller and a white table so I think, that's what the real thing should look like. What the heck, I have to use up those, so I put in it. And that's the one I take at 9 a.m.\nThe problem, Target does sell me my Ambien prescription and it puts it in the \"You're Never Going to Open This Sucker\" bottle. I had gotten tired of opening that bottle, so I put it in a all-used up carbo/levo bottle. I don't take my sleeping pills daily, just when I need them, so I know they're kept beside the t.v. Well, I know when I'm awake.\nI took the pill while I was on a email call, which aren't too hard, but I find myself losing focus. I get off the call and I get my review with my lead who has since moved on to another position so it's been a while. I'm feeling sick and falling asleep. I leave work wondering what the heck is wrong with me now and don't remember the bottle switch till I'm on the bus.", "summary": "Ambien makes you sleepy, is not a proper replacement for carbo/levo and phones can be heavy machinery under the right conditions"}
{"id": "t3_frbm0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "To Italian Redditors: Wondering about Striscia la Notizia/Berlusconi", "post": "I was wondering what the perception of Striscia la Notizia is among the Italian intelligentsia. I realize they must look down upon it, but how many channels out there are not in support of Berlusconi? It seems the liberal voices must be all but completely silenced. \n\nAlso, this is just out of curiosity :D. I am a fan of Giorgia Palmas for obvious reasons...and yet, I wonder what the media perception of her is (or at least among the intellectuals of Italy). Is she seen as a \"bimbo\" or just another attractive woman? She did win Miss Italy, so I do wonder if her image is tamer than that of the other showgirls/veline. \n\nThanks.", "summary": "How much non-Berlusconi media is there?/What is the perception of Giorgia Palmas?"}
{"id": "t3_1sz22x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [19F] been talking to a guy [21M] for a few days, and now I'm confused. Help?", "post": "I have been talking to a guy for about a week now, and we got along really well throughout the week last week. Sending texts/snapchatting... etc.\n\nThroughout the week he was sending me messages saying how beautiful/cute/funny I am, and that he liked me.\n\nHe came over to my dorm (College dorm) on Friday night and we watched a movie and cuddled while talking about random things. Towards the end of the night, we kissed a few times while saying cute things to each other.\n\nHe asked me on Friday night if we could hang out Saturday, and I said yes. Then I knew he was going to be busy for part of Saturday, but he said he might be free that night. He ended up being where he was almost all night, so we didn't hang out.\n\nHe called me Saturday night saying he really wanted to see me today (Sunday) before I go home (2 hours away) for a couple weeks tomorrow.\n\nAll day today he has been playing League of Legends with his brother in his apartment, saying that he wants to hang out with me, but that they are on a winning streak so he doesn't want to leave.\n\nPlease help me understand what is going on. I really like this guy, and I felt like we had a fantastic time Friday night, but now I feel like he is just blowing me off.\n\nI usually over think things a lot, so I'm thinking I may just be reading too much into this. At least I hope that's what's going on. I'm not sure.", "summary": "I (19F) have been talking to a guy (21M) for a week, he said he liked me a lot, now all of a sudden is blowing me off all weekend. What's the deal?"}
{"id": "t3_4r9jgv", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Toddler deliberately peeing on floor", "post": "2.5 year old (at the time-- she turns 3 in September) was nearly potty trained, but fully regressed to diapers when her baby brother was born. We let it rest for a couple months, but have begun working on potty training again. She starts preschool in 5 weeks and must be \"potty trained or nearly potty trained,\" otherwise she will be forced to leave. We got an amazing deal due to a need based scholarship, and so being kicked out would be very problematic, as we can't really afford preschool anywhere else (and I work part time so we need childcare regardless).\n\nShe has been doing well with potty training again-- poops and pees on the potty if we remind her, but she also will pee in her pull ups all day long and not even notice. So today we switched to full time undies so she'll notice when she's wet. We were expecting accidents, but we weren't expecting her to *enjoy* them. She has had 3 accidents today, and each time says something like \"Uh oh, something's on the floor... It's... PEE PEE!!\" Very excitedly and with a big smile on her face.\n\nWe have been making her clean the mess up as a \"natural consequence,\" but she thinks that's fun so I don't know how much of a \"consequence\" it is to her. The third time, my husband sent her to her room, essentially punishing the accident... I've heard that you shouldn't punish a child for accidents, but he thinks she's doing it on purpose. I don't necessarily think she is-- I mean, maybe she is, but maybe she really is having an actual accident and just thinks it's funny. I don't know. \n\nShe's very verbal and definitely understands that you *should* pee on the potty. She does notice when she has to go sometimes and successfully makes it to the potty. Other times we will remind her and take her to the potty, and she can pee \"on command\" upon sitting down. So I'm confident she is physically developed enough to potty train as far as communication and bladder control.\n\nThis is day one of undies, so I figured I'd get some advice here before we screw this up too badly.", "summary": "Almost 3 yo thinks it's funny to pee on the floor and enjoys the \"consequence\" of cleaning it up."}
{"id": "t3_3clxfs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/M] am the one who asks to hang out and plans the date with [20/F]. Does this make me needy? More of just a self reassurance post than anything else.", "post": "I met her at school earlier in the year and we have been dating for 3 months now and have been exclusive for 1 month.  Things seem to be going great and there is no rush to take things to the next level.  I recently realized, however, that I am always the one who sets up a day to hang out or to go on a date.  I think only once she kind of mentioned the fact.  Usually any day I pick she agrees to and when she is unable to show we always meet up the day after.  Another thing is that I moved to her town 10 months ago and she grew up there so while I am working and travelling a bit, I don't have many friends here so I have more flexibility with my weeks, where as she has her whole life here and is always busy.  I guess I just needed to write this out to come to a conclusion that I am not being needy and that things are just going pretty slow because we are both busy, but anyways, some advice could be of use.", "summary": "I make the plans always but she always says yes and if she says no I don't make a big deal out of it.  Wondering if this is still a needy quality?"}
{"id": "t3_gwdkn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "WTF is up with these birds?", "post": "So, outside my window there is a cornucopia of bird. Seriously. I have 2 Blue Jays, 2 Cardinals, 3 Doves, a shit ton of Sparrows and a Robin. It's like the 12 days of Christmas in my little inner-city pine tree. \n\nEverything is hunky-dory during the day. Peaceful, quiet. The occasional dove song (which is just lovely) at most.\n\nHowever, when I head to bed between 1-4am the birds go fucking nuts! It's like they're having a party every night of the week and I'm not invited. \n\nIt's really affecting my sleep. So what the fuck is up with these mother fucking birds. Why they no sleep at night?! I didn't think these types of birds were nocturnal.", "summary": "Birds make too much noise outside my window at night and I'm going crazy. Why is this? What do I do to shut them up?"}
{"id": "t3_1kejsj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[18M] with my girlfriend[18F] of 8-months breaking up before I move away", "post": "My girlfriend and I started dating in the middle of our last year of high school. We're both going to school on opposite sides of the country and we're going into different fields.\nWe talked about going long distance and I enjoyed the idea of going further with her.\nI broke up with her because at the end of college there was no guarantee we could be together. I told her that I wanted her to do everything she could possibly imagine with her degree and her life and that I did not want to get in the way of that. \nShe said she'd follow me and I told her I couldn't let her throw away her dreams to come with me on my adventure. I couldn't ask that of her--especially at this age.\nI did it because I care about her and want her to do everything she can with her life, and I just need to hear some other opinions. \nDid I do the right thing?", "summary": "Broke up with girlfriend because I didn't want to get in the way of her dreams. Did I do the right thing?"}
{"id": "t3_4f5w25", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] of a year, she wants to include others in the bedroom and I'm a little concerned.", "post": "So a bit of background; I am currently away at college, and my girlfriend, \"Elise,\" back home is going to a different school. She and I have had discussions about the limitations on our sexual relationship and have agreed that we can push them, but now I'm confused.\n\nI woke up this morning to a text message telling me that a few of her close friends from her school, \"Dina\" and \"Jim,\" who are currently engaged, have invited the two of us to have four-way sex with them.\n\nNow, I've always been interested in something like this, the idea of sex with a group has always turned me on. But, I'm not okay with other men being involved with Elise--in fact, the idea kind of makes me upset. So we preliminarily agreed to make it a kind of sex at the same time and place deal, where there will be no touching between the couples, but there is watching and talking between them.\n\nNormally, I'd be very okay with this idea, but we've never done anything like this before and I don't really know Jim or Dina very well at all. I'm also scared that involving others in the bedroom is a bad idea regarding the health of my relationship with Elise, or the relationship of Jim and Dina.", "summary": "My girlfriend wants to watch another couple have sex and maybe take it further from there. What limitations should I set down and/or should we even do this at all?"}
{"id": "t3_j8w7m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "International Relations, Economics, or Computer Science (or combinations) and why?", "post": "Well respected Redditors, your advice would be most appreciated. \n\nAfter my HS graduation, I went immediately to a Military Academy hoping to become a pilot.  I completed two years before having to leave last summer due to complications with an injury (can no longer serve/fly, but I am fully active, no real disabilities outside military life, etc).  I am now completing my degree at a well-respected liberal arts college.\n \nAt the moment, I am determining where to place my major and minor concentrations.  Due to the restrictions at my institution, I can either have 1. A major and a minor, 2. A major and two minors, or 3. A double major.\n  \nBetween International Relations, Economics, and Computer Science (I am at the point in my college career that I can make any of these 3 fit into one of the above listed configurations without delaying my graduation. They are all of interest to me.), which should I place where and why? (for example: International Relations major, minors in the other two\u2026. Economics and Computer Science double majors, dropping the IR\u2026 Computer Science major with IR and CS minors\u2026 etc.)\n\nFor the record, I am planning on going to grad school for a Ph.D. if I can (in any of the above subjects), or at the very least for a Master's (if possible right after college).\n\nI have completed research on my own, but I would like to hear \"real world\" advice from intelligent people in today's workforce who won't give me any BS.", "summary": "International Relations, Economics, Computer Science, which should I major/minor in (or just drop) and why??"}
{"id": "t3_mnbrf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Caught wife dirty-texting with co-worker.  How do I get past this?", "post": "41M, married 2 years to 35F.  She's pregnant and had started a new job when we found out a few months ago.  \n\nAbout 6-7 weeks ago we were sitting on our couch talking and she gets a text asking if she's the type of girl that likes to \"make love\" from a number I didn't recognize.  I busted her then, she peddled bullshit for a bit but eventually admitted the whole thing and said she would stop.  I wanted to believe her so I did, but my trust was shaken.\n\nAbout a week later I noticed she wasn't messaging me during the day as often as she had been and wasn't responding in her normal, flirty way.  I popped into her IM account (we each have each other's passwords) and saw a slew of messages between the two of them.  I let this go on for a few weeks, for a few reasons: while she was definitely flirting with him, she constantly reminded him she was married and would never do anything.  I believed she would be faithful even if she was playing out of bounds.  He kept pressing, flattering her and teasing, and they started having lunch together a couple of times a week.\n\nThen last Friday she crossed the line.  They went out to lunch and she got tipsy on a glass of wine, and when they continued their IM conversation later in the day she finally relented to his teasing and told him she had fantasized about sucking his cock or being taken from behind by him.  When I picked her up that night, I immediately confronted her about it and we talked it out.  She agreed not to continue and I really, really want to believe her, but it's driving me nuts.  She cried, she apologized, but I don't trust her anymore and I'm not sure I'll be able to continue in our marriage.  Help me fix this, Reddit.", "summary": "wife has been IM'ing with a co-worker after she said she'd stop, then she crossed the line between friendly flirting and pursuit."}
{"id": "t3_38f5pq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24F] am in a relationship with [24M] that we know is ending, what do you even do?", "post": "I have been with my SO for five years. It's been an amazing relationship in parts but unfortunately our long-term goals do not align (they haven't for years and we just pushed it under the carpet and said love can overcome everything) and neither of us are willing to compromise. That, and we just argue over insignificant things which just highlights our incompatibility.\n\nAnyway, we graduate this year and after the summer it will be over. It's been half a decade of our lives that we're just going to throw away. My gut instinct tells me that it is the right thing to do and that we'll be happier with other people. So I want to go ahead with this. But how do I push past all the doubt and the guilt and move forward without looking back?", "summary": "I know my relationship is ending but I don't even know how to come to terms with it or how to begin to move on?"}
{"id": "t3_uwbfm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What would you do if an ex SO lied to you from the begining of the relationship and knowingly gave you AIDS?", "post": "Throw away because this is relevent to me.  I found out my ex lied to me about several things from the begining of our relationship.  So this morning I went and got tested for all STDs the results don't get back until NLT Monday.  All I do right now is think the worst, and waiting until Monday is stressing me out.  All I can think about it is this crazy story I've made up in my head.  Now a little background, I'm 22 I have some rather big plans for my future and someday having a family is a high priority amoung those plans.  I would never dream of hurting anyone, I work with young kids at a taekwondo school in my town on a regular basis in addition to my big boy job.  But for whatever reason, I keep picturing getting the results back and them being positive for something uncureable and killing all of my future plans, effectively ruining my life.  I then go to confront the ex about it and find out they knew the entire time and knowingly gave me an uncureable terminal disease (I know AIDS isn't technically terminal itself and you can live a long time with it if you stay healthy, but what the hell is the point if you can't achieve your goals with it?).  As you might be able to imagine, my blood goes to instant boil at the thought of losing my future because this insolent fuck took it upon themselves to lie and cut my own life short.  I don't know if I would actually be able to do it, but the scene that continues plagueing my mind is, after hearing that my ex knowingly gave me this, I brutally kill them with a knife and accept whatever consequences ensue.  But after my blood cools off, I feel like shit for even thinking about doing it.  I'm stressing out like a mother fucker. >: /", "summary": "Stressing out over the possibility of losing everything.  It's most likely nothing but something to think about.  Thank you for your time and consideration on this matter.  Happy fucking Monday."}
{"id": "t3_1hibtu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [25/F] go about this when he [29/M] has his heart set on somewhere else?", "post": "He is from the Northeast and I am from the South. We started dating December 2012. He is here in the South for medical residency. We got along so well. Had so much in common, laughed at everything, and always wanted to be with each other as much as we could. We just clicked right off the bat. Then we had a misunderstanding in February 2013 and we parted ways.\n\n2 months go by and I contact him again because I still had feelings for him and wanted to know how he was doing. I didn't expect him to agree to hang out with me again but he did. We hung out and picked up right where we left off, laughing, joking, teasing and flirting with each other. Later that night he makes the first move and kisses me and then asks to see me again.\n\nHe hangs out with me all day the second time. We are now holding hands and freely showing affection. During this time I find out he has his heart set on living in the West Coast and that he will be in Europe for a month. He then asks me to hang out for the third time.\n\nWe hang out the third time and I'm trying to figure out how I was going to tell him I had feelings for him still since he was leaving for Europe the next day. I also saw certification paperwork in his luggage for the West Coast, which I probably wasn't suppose to see. So later that night I tell him how I feel and I'm crying because I'm upset. He feels the same way about me and is tearing up too. Tells me \"I don't know what is going to happen between us, we should keep in touch and you can visit me wherever I am.\" He leaves the next day and says \"I miss you and I'll be thinking of you.\"\n\nI know we didn't date for long but I wouldn't depreciate it because it was short. When you know, you just know. I feel like he'll be the one that got away. I just feel like a month away from someone is enough to make him forget about me.", "summary": "Got in touch again with a guy I had been dating earlier this year because I still had feelings for him. He makes the first move and kisses me and initiates hanging out with me 2 more times."}
{"id": "t3_2yk9rt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] met a great girl [16 F] online who lives in the same city. Problems are: she's moving away, I want to meet her, and the obvious age gap.", "post": "I don't want to go into too much detail, but enough that you guys can make out what my dilemma is.\n\nI met her online (certain app). We live in the same city, we talked for a while, found out we have a lot in common, and she's extremely nice. We only text chat, we almost know nothing about how the other looks, and at this point we don't really care. Here are some of the problems I'm facing now:  \n**1.** She's 16. I'm 20. There's an obvious age gap, and I don't know if it's completely ethical to continue trying to get with her.  \n**2.** She's moving to her home country in less than a month. I only just got to know her and she's already moving away. It seems like she's completely fine with continuing to talk to me while she's there, and I don't mind that. But...   \n**3.** She told me we can't meet face to face. I really want to meet her before she leaves. She said it's hard to do so here + her parents might not like that. I didn't want to insist, even though I had ideas on how to meet up in secret. I still really want to see her.\n\nSorry if there isn't enough info, I kinda rushed through this. I'm looking for advice on what to do. Is the age difference a problem? If not, what's my best course of action right now?", "summary": "Met girl online, she's significantly younger than me, I want to meet her before she leaves the country but she said it's not possible."}
{"id": "t3_2xpp8d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19/f] Don't Like How my Friends Talk about my Boyfriend [19/m]", "post": "I've been with him for 7 months and when we first started dating my friends would make comments about how hot he is (not to him, but to me and to eachother) and I was okay with it then but I expected thrm to stop once things got serious, and they didn't. They still make comments about him all the time and it makes me uncomfortable, one of them even tries flirting with him sometimes. She also comments like little emoji things on his pictures on instagram. He doesn't flirt back or anything but it still pisses me off, a lot. How can I tell them I'm not okay with this without seeming like a bitch? I'm a passive person in general so I've never even mentioned that it bothers me, but it really like eats away at me and I want them to stop.", "summary": "My friends talk about my boyfriends looks and even try flirting with him, I don't like it, I want them to stop but I don't want to seem like a bitch"}
{"id": "t3_4zgt7q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my ___ [22 F] of 9 months, caught her lying about a guy.", "post": "So my girlfriend and I go to the same college. Now she tutors Chinese (shes a foreign exchange student) and this one guy she tutors keeps hitting on her (hes like mid 30's old looking and fat) and she has told me about it before. They became friends and she hangs out with him in a group setting usually. Whenever he would hit on her she would text me about it, tell me in person, send screenshots, whatever and been up front and honest. She stopped a little bita go because she knows how mad it gets me that she still talks to this guy but I trust her. Recently theyve been hanging alone, I told her I'm against but she has told me he got a girlfriend and I should just be ok with her since I know her and know she wont do anything. Which I still believe, shes not near him on the ratings scale to even put the guy in her league. Still I get jealous so I checked her phone while she was in the shower and I found basically saying \"Oh man if I did [ACTIVITY] with you we wouldve had a better time. I should be your boyfriend.\" I semi confronted her about it with questions like is this guy really not trying anything with you? He hasnt hit on you? Talked shit about me? Told her she should date him recently? And she said no he has a girlfriend why would he hit on me.\n\nIts at this point I ask you guys do I confront her and tell her I snooped her phone and caught her lying to me repeatedly, or just trust her not to do anything with him.", "summary": "Girlfriend caught lying about creep she hangs with (with information I got by going through her messages) do I trust her or do I confront her"}
{"id": "t3_2iwl2i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure if I [28M] should break up with my girlfriend [21F] of over one year because she never does anything for me.", "post": "Hello all. I've been with my girlfriend for over a year now. I feel like I've done a lot of things for her. We traveled a lot, I take her different places all the time for instance restaurants, museums, show her new things, etc. 95% of the time I pay for everything and everything we do is my idea which I have no problem with. I buy her little presents here and there, when she is sick I bring her medicine/food/soup to her work without her asking. I do small things for her all the time.\n\nHowever about 4 months ago, I thought about our relationship and I could not really think of a single thing she has ever done for me. I had a talk about it with her and her response was basically \"I'm a girl, I don't know what I should be doing.\" So I told her, \"do little things for me from time to time, you don't need to buy me anything. Bring me lunch to work one day and surprise me, that will make me happy, it doesn't need to be anything major.\" I may be a bit overreacting, but I feel that when you're in a relationship with somebody you should be doing things for them from time to time. 4 months have passed and nothing has happened.\n\nWe had another talk, and her response was basically similar to what she told me 4 months ago. I told her that I need to think about things and I haven't talked to her in 3 days. \n\nI'm not sure if I'm overreacting, but I feel like my efforts are not be reciprocated in any way and I feel like this is a one sided relationship. She tells me that she loves me, which I believe, but at the same time I need for that love to be shown in some way. Not sure where to go from here, I was hoping she would change a little bit as the relationship progressed. I understand there's an age difference and that could be part of it, but I think she's old enough to know how relationships work.", "summary": "Girlfriend never does anything for me, while I take her to all kind of places and do small things for her. I feel like this is a one sided relationship."}
{"id": "t3_35msae", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me: 19[M] Her: [19F]. It's still over, right?", "post": "All right, so there's lonely little me who manages to somehow arouse the interest of a pretty girl for awhile. She even kissed me a few times one night. Of course, over the weeks I managed to screw it up by being too afraid to be assertive and she started losing interest in me. She stopped being the first to text and would hardly respond when I texted her. And yes, after the night we kissed all we did was text each other for a week or two because we were probably both waiting for each other to be the one to take things further.\n\nThe people here told me I dropped the ball and it's over. They said she was being too immature to come out and say it's over, probably because she felt she was in too deep because she offered to take my virginity. But then I worked with that girl last night, seeing her for the first time since things went sour. As we left for the night, she gave me a hug, said I can come over with her and a coworker if I changed my mind (even though she never asked to give me a chance to say no in the first place which makes me suspicious), and told me to text her. \n\nHalf an hour later I texted her saying I changed my mind and wanted to come over. She said the coworker (some weird guy 30 years older than us) was mad so she was leaving. Although she still could've been sitting on his couch chatting with him for all I know.\n\nI need you guys to slap some sense into me. Because she hugged me and told me to text her, I have this little misguided sliver of hope. It's still over right, and she's still just too afraid to reject me? What do I do now? Do I text her now? What do I text her? She said she wanted me to text her, but I bet if I text her now I'll be getting one word and effortless responses like before.", "summary": "Girl who turned unresponsive hugged me and told me to text her after I was convinced it was over. Still over and she's too afraid to say so yet? Slap some sense into me."}
{"id": "t3_1785j1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[17/M] Not sure what to do", "post": "Right now, I like one girl in particular at my school, we will call her X. We have been very good friends for almost a year now and we have a lot of fun together. However, before I knew her well, I told her I liked someone else, let's say Y. X gave me a bunch of advice for asking Y out, but I couldn't follow through. Over the months I found that I liked X much better than Y, so I told X that I gave up on Y. Also, X was in a relationship for most of our friendship and just broke up with the guy (who I don't really like) about a month ago. I asked X about it and she mentioned the possibility of dating someone else before we graduate. I really want to ask X out, but I'm not sure if it would be a good idea considering the circumstances. Help me out?", "summary": "I like a girl, not sure if now is the right time to tell her due to my previous like of someone else and her fairly recent break-up."}
{"id": "t3_tpa4g", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "First date advice needed, how to stay confident, conversation ideas and general tips", "post": "A girl I liked accepted my invitation to a Baskin Robins. So tomorrow afternoon, we're headed there together. We've been friends for a few months, not close but in school, and we're both Juniors in Highschool.\n\nIt's not normally like me to be shy, I've done a lot of nerve wracking public events, and everyone knows me as that guy that isn't afraid to do anything as well as acted in the school play.\n\nThe problem is recently around the girl it's been getting really akward, for both of us, I just choke up and can't think of anything to say, I can still add in a few witty comments here and there to make her laugh, but I'm really worried! It seems like all we can really say now is \"hey\" and \"how are you?\" and nothing really passed that. Any tips are appreciated! Maybe some conversation ideas for a ice cream shop setting.", "summary": "First date with girl I like at ice cream shop, loosing confidence and I'm at a loss of words when we speak, I really want this date to go well, all advice appreciated!"}
{"id": "t3_2ddo2n", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Young with terrible credit", "post": "Hey PF\n\nI'm 22 years old, and have managed to drop my credit score to below 600. This started with a Best Buy Credit card that my 19 year old self \"knew\" I would be ok obtaining. I ended up unable to keep up with payments, defaulted, it went to collections, and I was eventually able to pay it off after a generous tax return, but not after taking damage from it.\n\nAlso, I am currently in a position where I am unable to make payments on my student loans, and I think this is what has wrecked me so hard. I pay my car, phone, rent, and credit card payments on time (my card is constantly maxed out as well) but my score stays low due to my student loans, which are about $7000 all together.\n\nMy reason for posting is this; What are some suggestions to getting back on track? I'm currently trying to save up to get my real estate license to bring in more money (I was offered a partnership with one of the top realtors in my area) But I'm really struggling to even put that much extra money together, which amounts to around $1400. \n\nWhat info can I give to you guys that would give enough information to get a little advice on how I can better my score and start saving better?\n\nThanks in advance, and I'm sorry for the length of the post.", "summary": "Credit card and a small amount of student loan debt drowning my score, can't afford to keep up. What do I do now?"}
{"id": "t3_451qh1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What can I [21 M] do about my insecurities? I want to date this girl [21 F], but she likes to go drinking and clubbing. I like neither. I'm afraid to date her for something might happen and she might cheat on me.", "post": "I have never been in a relationship before. In essence, I have low self-esteem and am afraid. There is this girl who I have liked for years. Recently, we've been talking and I have a huge chance with her. Unfortunately, I found out she likes to go clubbing with her friends. She goes about once a month (or so I've noticed) and like to drink over there.\n\nI understand, from reading, that clubbing is \"fun.\" That girls go there to have a great time with their friends. There is nothing to be afraid of. Yet, I am. I am afraid of the guys who will be hitting on her. I am afraid that she may get too drunk and cheat on me. I know this is wrong, but I can't help it. If I can't get over this feeling, I won't be able to date her.", "summary": "I like a girl who likes to drink and go clubbing. I don't like either. I'm afraid to date her for she might cheat on me. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4ps4rg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my Girlfrind [22F] of two years, was kissed by another guy. What to do?", "post": "My girlfriend is in another country for a couple of weeks with her university. While she was there, another student told her that he liked her. She explained she had a boyfriend, me, and that she wasn't interested. \n\nA few days later a group of them went to the club and apparently he was getting quite close with touchy etc. Nothing happened that night but the next day she messaged him laying down the ground rules reminding him that she had a boyfriend and wasn't interested. \n\nFast forward to yesterday. The group went out for dinner and were drinking. They were all squished together at the table and she says she didn't notice the closeness because she was tipsy when he then leaned in a kissed her on the mouth. She then got up and said that that wasn't okay and left.\n\nMy girlfriend has been very straight and honest (From what she's told me) but we're fighting. It is a bit hard over messenger. I know she didn't do it on purpose but I'm still very hurt. I've been cheated on before, and while this isn't quite in the same category it's bringing back all those old emotions. \n\nMy question is am I over reacting or am I within my rights?\n\nI've tried to provide context and best I can. Please ask if you need any more clarification. Thank you in advance", "summary": "Girlfriend of two years was kissed by another guy while overseas. I'm confused with how I feel and what to do next."}
{"id": "t3_30gg6p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What should I [22f] know about couples counselling with my bf [23] of two years? He is adamant about needing to live alone. We tried for a month and I just can't.", "post": "When we lived apart for that month I lived with my parents. I'm already not goo with change and it literally uprooted me from all I was comfortable with. I thought living alone was space enough for him but it was basically like we weren't even in a relationship. He thinks that if he wants to go a whole week with no contact whatsoever then I should allow that. It just wasn't a relationship in my eyes. I tried breaking up with him but he didn't want that. So we moved back in. It's been a month and everything seems fine. But he still says feels the same when we discuss it. It really hurts me and I'm scared to renew our lease together because I don't want things to end up fucked up.  \n\nSO we agreed on counselling. Basically we want an idea of whose feelings are more abnormal. He says that if the therapist agrees that his feelings are abnormal for a relationship then he will work on whatever problems he has. I'm not sure how to word that. Because obviously the therapist won't \"take sides\" at least as far as I know. I just wanna know what I should expect from our session[s]. I'm not really looking for advice from this sub in our issues. I don't need more thoughts floating around in my head. I would just like a professional opinion on our situation. Thanks guys!", "summary": "How do therapists give advice on relationship issues. What generally goes on in sessions? Do they offer insight or opinions on our feelings or just help us sort through our feelings on our own?"}
{"id": "t3_ntwnj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I've made a huge mistake...", "post": "My friend and I have been friends since elementary school. Without delving too far in we started hanging out less around college but still share interests. In college I lived in the dorms fine and a house with 5 guys fine as well. More recently I've graduated and moved into a 1 br apartment and furnished it completely. A few months back I had a slight concern I wouldn't be able to fund it myself and looked for a roommate, naturally I turned to my friend. Unfortunately at that time he couldn't so I lived on my own. Since then I've been able to position myself to not need his help.\n\nWell a few weeks ago I forgot that he said at this time he would be interested in moving in. As a good gesture I mentioned it to him and the idea took. Now we are sharing a room in my small apt. I don't hate him or anything but I have grown to enjoy my solitude and the fact that I could have people over if I wanted. \n\nThe first few nights were fine bc he was on the couch, but now we split a room together. We picked up forms to make it official however we haven't signed or done anything with them yet. It may be selfish of me but I have grown accustomed to living on my own and being independent. I would like to have my apt back but I feel like it would be a dick move and I don't want to ruin the friendship.  Please help me reddit, you're my only hope!", "summary": "I live in a one bedroom apt and added a roommate I didn't need. Now I miss my freedom but we haven't made it official yet."}
{"id": "t3_3qvkya", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17 M] broke up with my GF [16 F] of 4 months, Tumblr has other ideas.", "post": "Hey all, kinda new to this so I'm not sure exactly what I'm doing, but I was hoping for some help. Hopefully I've come to the right place.\n\nSo basically, I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 months a few weeks ago. She was always really clingy and attached to me, even after I dumped her.\n\nWhile I was dating her, I made a Tumblr account by her suggestion, which is where my problem lies. When I dumped her, I made it very clear that I didn't want hide nor hair of her in my life anymore. But, she never bothered to unfollow my Tumblr, and it makes me slightly uncomfortable for a couple of reasons. The first one is entirely my fault -since she's still following me, I can't help but to keep checking back on her blog. This makes it really hard for me to forget her, and let her go, because no matter how many times I tell myself to stop looking, \nI can't control myself. The other reason can't really be helped -even though I made sure she knew I don't want any part of her in my life anymore, she still goes through my blog and likes my posts.  \n\nAll of this makes me really uncomfortable, but I'm not sure how to go about dealing with it. Should I just block her? Confront her? Am I overreacting? Am I being the dick here? I really don't know, and some help would be nice.", "summary": "Broke up with ex, ex still follows me on Tumblr, which makes me really uncomfortable -Not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4bu9gp", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Fianc\u00e9 accidentally signed up for credit card..", "post": "So my fianc\u00e9 was grocery shopping at the commissary and cashier asked him if he wanted to get what he understood was a points card. He even asked to make sure it wasn't a credit card because we are about to close on a house in a couple of months and do not want anything to affect our credit. She said it wasn't and he signed up. \n\nHe didn't think much of putting his SSN in because in the military it's your identity number and his rank and all showed up when he put it in, and then he discovered it was a CREDIT CARD. Is there anything we can do to dispute this. It's already popped up on his credit report and he doesn't want another credit card..", "summary": "fianc\u00e9 thought he was signing up for a points card but in fact was a credit card and we are closing on a house in June and don't want anything to affect his credit score. What can we do?"}
{"id": "t3_uqsxm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So a company printed off 500,000 flyer bags and distributed them... with my number.", "post": "So this is a bit of a odd question, and a bit of a moral one as well.\n\nA local company named ARC is in the Nashville area. They are similar to goodwill in the respect that they will pick up your clothes for a tax break.\n\nThe branch of the group here prints off yellow bags with their number here on the bag to call and schedule pick ups of the bags. (They employ mentally handicap members of society to do most of the labor of the company.)\n\nThey have put instead of their number on the bags, my cellphone number. In a slight defense to them it is only one digit off. However I'm receiving over 30+ calls a day from angry individuals wondering when \"their shit is gonna be picked up.\" \n\nAfter speaking with the district manager who thought I was lying and making the entire thing up until she went and found the bag with the wrong number on it she offered to take my phone number and =>> HAVE ME PURCHASE A NEW ONE FROM MY PHONE COMPANY <<=\n\nThis did not set well with me.", "summary": "Is it possible to sue for harassment for a non profit organization that employs mentally handicap individuals since they've printed my number on 500,000 bags and distributed them?"}
{"id": "t3_24xnpt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my ex [25 M] of 6 mos, this is letting go", "post": "Dated my ex for about a year, we went on a few trips together, met each other's family and friends, and essentially lived together for a short period. I was going through some big changes with graduating college and finding a job that was fulfilling for me- my hopes and dreams were a bit unrealistic, and I only worked on and off during college so it was a stressful transition. Anyway, I leaned too much on him for emotional support because we were always around one another and I didn't consider the amount of strain it would put on the relationship. We had other problems, namely expectations of his friends and family. I'm kind of a proponent of the idea that expectations skew reality, but whatever, people still see what they're primed to see.\n\nI think we both wanted to take the relationship to the next level but the reality is that we're not logistically at the same point in life and we might never be. Thiiiis noob was always on my case about how I needed to be more assertive and secure in our relationship, but he didn't have the gall to do the same. He's an extreme people pleaser, and he's becoming a total beefcake who's been swept by the upgrade mentality. Patronizing jerk.\n\nI used to swear that we were made at the same time (close bdays). And If I could go back, I would teach little me all that I needed to know in order to be ready for him to come along- after talking with some of my favorite revolutionaries, because this is all fantasy anyway. \n\nNow, I know it's not entirely my fault that I didn't wake up to some realities until it was too late to make a 180, but it still sucks knowing that I was left because of some bogus preconceived ideas. Change takes time. Breakthroughs don't happen over night, Einstein!", "summary": "Ex came back after 6 mos to fill my head with nonsense and disappear, this is my reaction. More details in comments. Please reply if you've experienced problems with love or friendship that were related to outside forces."}
{"id": "t3_2perrd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/m] Struggling with a strange relationship/non-relationship FWB thing [22/f]", "post": "My best friend's girlfriend introduced me to a friend of hers on a blind double date setup a couple of months ago. That night went fantastic, we hit it off immediately, got a kiss goodnight, everything was looking up. We go on a few dates, walk in the park, dinner and a movie, etc and things continue to look up. The one problem we continued to have was not really communicating, we would not talk/sparsely talk for a week or more between dates, it seemed like we just didn't have a lot to talk about. We had sex, the sex was great, we both left extremely satisfied. But despite that, and the fun we had on dates, we continued to not really talk. Both of us, realizing this was strange, apologized for the lack communication and promised to improve. Yet we still kind of drifted apart I guess, meanwhile we still meet to have sex. I'm not sure who's fault it was really that we didn't talk as much as we should, probably mine regardless. So I broke it off,  so to speak, because I felt like we were both putting on a facade as far as the relationship side of things goes and I offered to continue our friendship. She was relieved to hear all of this as she was feeling the same way but she requested that we still be available to one another sexually if either of us was getting horny or whatever. We had an awesome productive conversation about it and agreed to be FWB for the time being. Fast forward a month and we have continued having sex once a week or so. Sex continues to be good. I know very well that she is not interested in more than a FWB relationship, and I remember a time very clearly when I honestly felt nothing toward her romantically but despite the logical side of my thinking telling me to move on, I feel an aching love-sickness especially now as her Ex is in town. I know that I should not feel this way, but I honestly cannot help but get that dreadful tight feeling my chest thinking about her with someone else. What do I need to do reddit? Any advice would be more than amazing, Thanks for reading.", "summary": "Blind date leads to attempted relationship which fails due to lack of communication and turns into a happy FWB situation. Apparently still have feelings for girl. What do."}
{"id": "t3_3e0w1c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it wrong for me [32M] to skip my sister-in-law's wedding [26F] so I can go on a once-in-a-lifetime guy's trip with my friends? Wife [30F] not happy.", "post": "I'll be honest. This wedding has been in the making for the last year, and the trip I want to go on is sort of last minute. I've never formally agreed to go to the wedding, but realistically it's always just been accepted as a given that I would be at the wedding since it is my wife's sister. \n\nOne of my college buddies just recently told our group of friends that he's going to Australia in October for business but plans to spend an extra week there just kicking around and exploring. One thing lead to another and two friends from our group decided to join him. I've wanted to go to Australia ever since I was in college, but I never could get a group together. It looks like that's finally happening! The problem is that I'll have to miss my sister-in-law's wedding because it falls right in the middle of the week we're planning to go, and it wouldn't make sense to leave early or go late. It's an expensive trip, but I can make it work. I think it would be money well spent. \n\nOf course my wife is not happy about this, which I can understand. She's very close to her sister, so I can see why the wedding is a big deal to her, but I don't think she really understands my position. I like her sister, but we're not close. The same is true for her fiance. I have nothing against them, but the only reason I would be going is for my wife. Normally, I'd be okay accepting this, but I have a chance to go on an awesome trip with good friends that I don't get to hang out with that often. I think I'm justified in wanting to go and am being both reasonable and fair.", "summary": "I have a chance to go on an awesome trip with my friends to Australia. Wife doesn't want me to go because I'd miss her sister's wedding."}
{"id": "t3_j1v9x", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Parents/College Students of Reddit: How did you deal with your/your parents' empty nest syndrome?", "post": "I am leaving for college in about three weeks, and my mom is already freaking out quite a bit. In fact, she has been getting progressively more upset ever since I graduated from high school in June. I feel awful because I know that she's upset, but it's really starting to drive me up a wall. Some background:\n\n* I am my mother's only child. After breaking up with my father, she eventually got married to my stepdad. They have decided not to have any more kids, though she does have two small dogs to nurture.\n* As my mom has pointed out, I have been in her life longer than she's been without me. (My mom got pregnant at 17, and I'm currently 18.)\n* My stepdad has a strange need to update me every time that my mom cries or gets upset about my leaving, and the guilt is really getting to me.\n* Both my mom and my stepdad seem to have some jealousy over the amount of time that I spend with my boyfriend, which I find to be unreasonable because I'm usually out with him when they are at work or in the evenings, when they are tired and reading or sleeping. The guilt over this is also starting to get to me.\n* I suspect that all of this is complicated by the fact that my college is about a 14-hour drive from my home.", "summary": "What are the best ways to deal with a parent who is experiencing empty nest anxiety? As a parent, what would make letting go easier on you?"}
{"id": "t3_3jilwp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Tomorrow is my birthday [30M], and I'd rather just pretend that it didn't exist instead of my wife [28F] and friends doing anything about it.", "post": "When you're a kid, you look forward to birthdays.  Your friends and family do something special for you, you get a few cool presents, and have something to eat.  \n\nBut now that I'm older, I'd rather pretend that my birthday doesn't exist.  I fear getting older and irrelevant, and hate knowing that my youth is behind me.  A few of my friends are around five years or so younger than me, and it's so cringe-inducing when I realize that they aren't familiar with the movies or music that I grew up with.  Turning 30 tomorrow is a milestone I'd rather not have to deal with.  I really am turning into a damn old man, at least mathematically, and I hate it.\n\nI've always gotten kind of depressed in recent years when my birthday is coming up.  It reminds me that I'm drifting further into irrelevance, that my best youthful days are behind me, and that another year has passed without me doing anything great with my life.  I'd rather just not acknowledge it.    In my head, I'd prefer to think that I'm still 19 years old without a care in the world.  Of course, a 40 hour a week office job and a mortgage makes that impossible, but at least I can dream.\n\nMy wife brought it up last week and asked what I wanted to do for my birthday.  I told her I'd just like to have a nice drink at home and watch a movie with her or just grill out some burgers with our friends or something like that.  But I know that they've probably got something crazy planned since I'm turning 30, and I honestly just dread it.  I don't know how to approach it, and I'm already kind of a nervous wreck over getting older anyways.  I feel guilty about it because I know they mean well, which is kind of hitting me and making me even more depressed about the whole deal.\n\nAnyone have any suggestions on how to approach this?  How did you deal with a big age milestone?  Did it make you depressed too?  How do you suggest I go about this?", "summary": "I'm turning 30 tomorrow, and getting older and irrelevant is making me depressed.  I suspect my wife and friends have something planned for me as a surprise, and I'd prefer to not acknowledge how old I'm getting."}
{"id": "t3_1g5grc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My live-in partner of ~2 years [27M] and I [23F] have hit a rough patch. How do I know if it is time to talk about ending the relationship?", "post": "My relationship with my boyfriend (~2 years) has been great. We have had a lot of fun together and we have been respectful and honest throughout the relationship. For the past month or so there has been a change. We are shorter with each other, we aren't as physical, and we seem to be generally less excited to be around each other.\n\nI have been considering bringing up the end-of-relationship talk. However, I am incredibly unsure if that is even what I want or is best for us. This past month of lackluster relationship could conceivably be a rut that we need to wait out. I have been unemployed for three weeks and I know that I don't feel like the best version of myself. Maybe my own insecurity is being reflected in our relationship.\n\nHe gets home in a couple hours and we will have to talk about our unfinished disagreement from this morning. He didn't sleep well so I did the morning chores so that he could sleep in. When he did get up he was short with me because I didn't make the dog a raincoat and he swears he asked me to do it weeks ago but I had absolutely no memory of him asking. I was really surprised that we were disagreeing over a silly and easily rectified miscommunication and was hurt that he was blind to the ways in which I was actively trying to make his life easier. We didn't get to finish talking it out because he had to go to work. It just seems like there has been one silly disagreement after the other that we have to work out. We never let the little stuff bog us down before.\n\n**So my question is this, r/Relationships-** How do I know it is time to start talking about the end of an otherwise loving relationship? Furthermore, how do you end a relationship well?", "summary": "I love my boyfriend but we seem to be drifting apart. How do you know that a relationship has come to its most natural end? Is there a good way to end a relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_1eq6rg", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Ex GF's meth addict mom moved in to our vacant apartment with her BF under my GF's name without permission.", "post": "So we broke up a month ago and she moved out and left me there, I decided to put in the 30 days notice and just move home. \n\nNote: the 30 days was put in 4/16 so we were to be out by 5/16, no problem. \n\nAbout 5/10 and I'm sleeping in the apartment alone, it's almost completely empty and ready when my ex GF's mom shows up with a sob story about how she's homeless just quit her job (making 2000+ a paycheck) and just needed a place for a few days. Well she had helped me in the past so I said yes. Over the next few days I finished my packing told my ex about her mom and told her to take care of it. \n\nNow here we are my ex said her mom would move in under her own name and that she would talk to the landlord and everything and my ex believed her, I told her no way is that true and asked her to please call the landlord, turns out her mom lied and it's still in my GF's name.\n\nI'm really at a loss of ideas here is this even legal? As a side note she hired someone to break into and rob her last place a few months back then coincidentally while my ex was out of town her place was broken in to... Her mom called right away to let her know she would never do something like that....\n\nI'm sorry if this is jumbled I'm writing on my phone and honestly just confused and worried right now. So, advice?", "summary": "My ex's mom is staying in our old apartment without permission and I want to know how to get her the hell out?"}
{"id": "t3_45sb9q", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [18/F] can't tell if my first date went well for him [21/M] or not.", "post": "We met on tinder and we've been talking on and off for about 2 months now. We made plans in advance for yesterday and we agreed that it would be a date/hangout mix. He let me know in advance that these sort of things made him a bit nervous and that he's a little shy in person. He drove about 30 minutes to get here. \n\nSo as soon as we met, we grabbed some dinner. With better lighting, I could see him more clearly and he was super attractive. It was about 8pm when we got in, and we literally stayed in the restaurant until it closed at 11 just talking. He paid for the meal while I was in the bathroom. After that, we decided to just drive around. I asked him if he had to be home at any time and he said it really didn't matter. \n\nThe whole date was just a lot of talking and getting to know each other. Near the end of it there was a lot of humor and teasing. He asked me if this was one of my better Tinder dates, and I said definitely. I asked him if he would wanna meet again sometime and he said for sure. However, when the end of the date came (12:30am, my curfew),  and when we were sitting in front of my house, I was super confused with the body language. I felt as if I was being really awkward because I unbuckled my seatbelt and looked at him and lingered for a while. He did look into my eyes and at my lips a couple of times, but then he'd turn away and look out the window. We both awkwardly/nervously laughed.  I'm used to guys kissing on the first date it if goes well so I felt bad at this point and so I went home. Wasn't sure if he wanted to kiss or not so I didn't go in for it.\n\nHe texted me when he got home \"You're probably asleep, but, OH MY GOD. IM FINALLY HOME. Let's just say I'm stupid and made a very wrong turn lol\"\n\nWould he have made an excuse to leave earlier if the date was going badly? Do you think he's still interested?", "summary": "Met up with a guy I've been talking to on and off for 2 months, hung out from 8 to 12:30, but there was no end of the date kiss. Was he not interested?"}
{"id": "t3_3dxbbj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] can't get over boyfriend's past [25 M] relationship with his gf a year after they broke up", "post": "I really love my BF, but he told me something about his past a while back and I can't get over it.\n\nHis previous girlfriend cheated on him right after they started to live together. It's been several years since then, but he at first told me that they never had sex in the year they kept living together. Then he came out and told me they had sex everyday and he was high most of the time living with her, trying \"everything but meth\".\n\nI have gotten over it in some way by saying \"it was the drugs, it's not entirely his fault\". I am addicted to smoking and trying to quit, so I started vaping. I told him I didn't want him to do it too because it bothered me because I was worried he would do it as an escapist thing and it made me think about that past situation. I caught him doing it by the sound via skype and got really upset with him. He tells me I need to get over it, but gets jealous when I vape because a male friend gave me a unit (when I use his I hear the sound and get upset because I remember it). I just didn't want him to do it because I thought \"what happens if it's not enough\"? It would just be a gateway for him to do other things, and since he was previously using a lot of drugs I get really worried.\n\nI don't know if I am being too unreasonable. I just don't know how to get over it and it's killing me. I know it has nothing to do with me, but the fact that he was able to do something like that just drives me crazy. I don't know how to cope with this, but I do want to be with him. We are trying to have a longterm relationship and I have met all his family. I don't know if I am the fucked up one.", "summary": "BF tells me he fucked his exgf everyday for a year after they broke up. How should I cope with this?"}
{"id": "t3_2pumiv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I don't know how to have friendships- or how to interact with people (F 19)", "post": "Alright guys, so here's the deal. I am nineteen years old, and I've learned a lot this past year about things I need to learn in order to become a healthy, happy adult.\n\nOne of these things is coming to terms with the fact that my relationship with my family, especially my mother, has been emotionally abusive.\n\nThis lifelong relationship has basically fucked me up, and I have an incredibly hard time putting my trust in people. Hard to be vulnerable to anyone when you've been hurt so many times by your primary caregiver, y'know?\n\nBut I want to change. I want to change so that I can be happy.\n\nI am INCREDIBLY lucky to have a boyfriend who is kind and loving and endlessly patient, and his unconditional love has made me try very hard to be the same kind of person to him. Seriously, I feel like I won the lotto. God is real, my boyfriend is proof.\n\nRight now we are in a long distance relationship while he is off at college. I still live at home. My plan is to get my associate's degree, get a job, and get the heck out of here. \n\nI dream about a life where I am surrounded by loving and accepting people who I can count on and cry to. I'm so tired of holding things inside. I want people to cuddle with.\n\nI WANT healthy friendships. But truthfully speaking, I am very, very scared. I don't know who to trust- I don't know how to gauge if a person is trustworthy or not. I don't want to get hurt anymore.", "summary": "Abusive parents make it really hard to connect with other people. I want to make IRL friends, but I'm scared. Words of support would be really great."}
{"id": "t3_27zorz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [21/F] ask the guy [24/M] I'm seeing to take down his \"single\" status on Facebook?", "post": "I've been seeing a guy pretty consistently (about once a week) for around three months now. I'm pretty inexperienced in terms of relationships, and I brought up exclusivity way too early (at around the 4th date), because we started doing physical things, and I wasn't that comfortable doing them without exclusivity. When I asked then if he was looking for exclusive things, he sheepishly said, \"I don't know.\" But then he said he really respected that I didn't want to do physical things without exclusiveness--that it was rare for this time and place... (um, ok.)     \n\n     \n\nAnyway, it seems like he's been leaning more toward exclusiveness in the last two months. When I found his okc profile, which he hasn't signed on to since Jan, he said, \"maybe I should take that down.\" I think I shrugged in response, and said a half-hearted, \"yeah.\" He also said, \"I'm not seeing anyone else, if that's what your'e afraid of.\"      \n\nRecently, I texted him, \"do you want to see other people?\" and he said, \"not necessarily. I mean, I'm not approaching people in grocery stores anymore.\" (That was how we met...)      \n\nI was like, \"ok,\" or something like that. I honestly don't even know if I want to be exclusive with him, it's just that things have gone further physically than I'm comfortable with without exclusivity. (I lost my v-card to him...) It's not that it means that much to me or whatever, I just feel like because it's the first time I've done it, I'd like some exclusivity.      \n  \nSorry for the ramble! Anyway, I just wanted some opinions on whether it's reasonable to ask him to take down his \"single\" status on Facebook. Not to put \"in a relationship,\" but to just leave it blank.", "summary": "Girl who's relatively inexperienced with relationships wants to know if she should ask the guy she's been seeing to change his \"single\" status on Facebook to blank."}
{"id": "t3_2nztjj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Found out my (28f) ex (32m) is having a kid, and now all I want is to sleep around and I'm very depressed.", "post": "I dated this guy last year. He impregnated a 20f pretty quickly after we broke up and when I found out, I got extremely sad and jealous, because I wish I was on my way to having a family. We broke up because of infidelity.\n\nNow though, all that I want to do is go out and get plowed by pretty much any guy. I don't want a relationship, I just want to go out and have revenge sex. Why is that? I think I'm just so upset, and angry. I don't know what to do, or really how to handle this.", "summary": "I'm extremely jealous of an ex having a kid, and I pretty much don't know how to handle this and I'm afraid it'll sink me into a deep depression. advice?"}
{"id": "t3_4hcm4z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A [29, F] girl I started dating (1 month) wants to be friends with benefits now that I told her that I [25, F] don't see myself in a relationship with her. Am I crazy to pursue it?", "post": "She's fairly attractive, I like hanging out with her, and the sex is awesome, but I felt myself shutting her out. I told her that I wanted to just be friends and she suggested FWB. \n\nI'm not really ready to be in a relationship with anyone.  I have loved being single for the first long duration of time in my gay life. I also will likely be moving in a year, so I don't want anything to hold me back (in a relationship, I consistently give up leaving my home state). I think a FWB might help me stay single while also letting me safely enjoy intimacy.\n\nI'm not super concerned about falling for her because she isn't truly my type. She's butch, and I like femmes. \n\nShe also seemed super cool with us not being a thing anymore. She's only been with two women, both as part of relationships, so I was surprised how chill she was with the news.", "summary": "Am I crazy to start a FWB relationship? I want to be friends with her, but what boundaries should I enforce?"}
{"id": "t3_rs1y4", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Father's custody of an unborn child, without being married?", "post": "Looking for some advice on the topic, or specifically if someone knows a good lawyer in the Riverside, CA area for this, that would be awesome.\n\nMy step son is having a kid, and the mother-to-be is the victim of harassment by him.  He has a history of domestic violence when he lived with us (I had him arrested as a minor), and he has a history of domestic violence with her.  They are unmarried, and he is now threatening 'all out war' to get full sole legal custody of the child when she is born.  He is even pushing to break a restraining order, and get an early judgement on visitation and custody rules.  \n\nHe has threatened to retain a lawyer, which there is a 75% chance he can not afford to do and is using it as a stalling tactic.  A new restraining order hearing was postponed today when he said he was retaining counsel at the end of this week, and it has been pushed to mediation (for custody issues, not RO issues).\n\nHe's great at playing the system and the people that work inside of it.  I am all for getting her a lawyer to fight against this but I am wondering just what we're in for.\n\nHe will not be named on the birth certificate.  \nThere is no paternity test, just that they both agree it is his.\nHe has no stable support system or family to help him out.\nShe is surrounded by a supportive family, and his mother and myself.\n\nIs he facing an up hill battle here to get visitation and possible custody, or is she?", "summary": "= Boy meets girl.  Boy knocks up girl.  Boy beats up girl.  Boy threatens girl.  Boy wants to take girl's kid away.  Girl needs help keeping kid."}
{"id": "t3_3flfhb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Getting back with my ex", "post": "My girlfriend and I had a very strong loving relationship of 1.5 years, I am 18 and I am her first boyfriend whom she lost her virginity to. 3 months ago I went on my overseas experience and we agreed the before I left we would do long distance, unfortunately a week or so ago my girlfriend broke up with me saying she doesn't love me anymore (although I believe it's because we've had no physical contact, or that she's frustrated I'm on there) I followed the no contact rule and in just 2 days she messaged me saying she wants me back I accepted and then a few days she broke up with me again saying she doesn't love me (I believe it's because I allowed myself to look weak, she's not trying to screw me around she's just confused about her feelings) anyways I am in just in need of advice on how I should handle this second breakup she said she understands if I don't want to be friends with her and I said I do, however I have only let her contact me and have replied in a friendly and light manner. At this point I am wondering in order to make it more likely that I get her back as I am coming back from my travels in 1 and a half months and will be able to give her that physical contact whether I should continue being friends and have light chats or whether that we'll turn her off more and put me in the friend zone, or should I just drop contact with her for a month and then try talking to her after, I will see her again in 1 and half months anyways I just want to maximise me chances. Please help me out guys, thanks!", "summary": "long distance is putting a strain on the relationship I am returning to her soon and want to maximise my chances of getting her back"}
{"id": "t3_3j68bv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "me [17 M] and my Girlfriend [19 F] of 1.5 years are facing issues because of her parents.", "post": "I have been dating my girlfriend for 1.5 years. Things have been going great until this past Saturday, when her parents and her got into an argument and her parents blamed me for her being \"negative\" (A common theme in their arguments, bringing my name up). \n\n(My girlfriend's parents and I have always had a rocky relationship. They don't like me because I do not like to party or drink like they do. They see this as a weird behavior I guess. )\n\nMy girlfriend and her parents got into a simple argument and my name was brought up as the cause for my girlfriend's \"negative\" attitude. My girlfriend later texted me saying she can't handle how her parents hate her because of their not liking me. She wants to break up with me because she can't pick me over her parents. I don't want to lose her, and she doesn't seem like she's fighting for us at all.", "summary": "Girlfriends parents don't like me and fight with her over it, she wants to break up so they won't hate her anymore. How do I mend the situation and make sure my girlfriend wants to stay with me?"}
{"id": "t3_15u5gu", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "M/28 dating 26/F. GF has trust issues with me. That Facebook stuff too...", "post": "Never thought I'd be posting something like this but I'm at my wits end. \n\nHave been seeing the woman of my dreams for about 5 months now. Just flew 15 hours to meet her parents in another country and we had the best time ever. Our holidays were nice nice and everything was great.\n\nYesterday morning, my GF woke up crying to me, telling me she is crazy. And that I was going to kill her. I thought she had cheated on me or something horrible but it wasn't as bad as I had imagined. But still a shocker of what she admitted to me. \n\nShe REACTIVATED my Facebook account. That means she had the password resent to my email address then logged into my Facebook after the new pswd was generated. So she could read my messages and whatnot. When she told me, I just stared at her and then kind of laughed it off, just because I didn't want to have a bad day before I had to go back to work the following. \n\nI was pissed inside. I knew she was insecure a bit but didn't think she'd do something like this. Just to clarify, I haven't given her any reasons to go snooping. I don't go out much. When I do it's once in a blue moon. I always answer my phone. I always text within a reasonable amount of time, and don't have randoms contacting me or anything sketchy to give her reason to be looking into me. \n\nI want to stick up for myself but don't want to ruin things by flying off the handle. In her defense she \"has to know everything and wants to know everything about me\".....which is fine, but I feel she is ruining something amazing between us. \n\nI don't want to distance us from each other but I feel betrayed and all that crap. I offered for us to see a counselor just to talk through things, but tha's pretty serious. But I am serious about her. \n\nWhat are your thoughts? I do love this woman and she loves me too, but I'm sad about this crap. Glad she admitted this to me prior to me finding out.", "summary": "GF reactivated my FB account. Admitted to me prior to me finding out. I feel betrayed. She's insecure. I want to work through this, but wow."}
{"id": "t3_18ha95", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "39/f, think IFU by having sex too quickly.", "post": "I'm a 39/f who went without sex for 5 years following a painful divorce. I did not have any clue about how to date, and my confidence was so low that I didn't even feel like a woman any more. Soooooo, I got sick of being overweight and eventually lost 35 pounds. \n\nMet a great guy when renting a U-Haul (he owns the rental place) and he flirted with me. I didn't think anything of it cause I didn't think he could possibly like ME. Then, he asked me over to watch a game one night...and we never made it to the end of the game. He apparently liked my body even if I didn't, and I was on cloud 9. Went out a couple more times, then he inexplicably dropped off the face of the earth for 4 weeks.\n\n  I was hurt, but took it philosophically and signed up for a dating site - I am very sexually oriented, so I found a few \"encounters\" and started to relax a bit and enjoy being single. \n\nThen, he called me up & we resumed a ?relationship? - and we truly like each other as people, but had sex every time we met (apparently strong attraction both sides)\n\nRecently texted me & said he wanted more than just sex, and wanted to get to know me more. I said I wanted that, too. He then said that it would not be in my best interests to spend more time with him. Huh? What? My brain hurts. I asked him point blank if he wanted to break things off, and he said \"by no means!\"\n\nI like him lots, he is a good person, he has brought himself out of a lot of dark places, and I didn't expect to like him so much. \n\nI think IFU by having sex with him too soon. Is it fixable?", "summary": "I had sex with a guy on the 1st date, thought it was casual at first, but feel more now. He says he does, too. Is it too late to back up & have a do-over?"}
{"id": "t3_4ds86w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] with my bestfriend[18 M] for life, is starting to date a girl that treated him bad in a past relationship.", "post": "My bestfriend, lets call him Carl is a womans man. He's never really had any issue getting girls. Carl isnt a big fan of partying either, sometimes he likes it, sometimes he doesnt. What im trying to say is, he always has a girlfriend and thats just the way its been. 1-2 years ago he broke up with his gf and then he was single up until Januari where he started flirting and, not dating but very close to dating a girl in his class.\n\nIve met the girl and shes pretty and nice and everything, but i think she treated him rather poorly. Not in a abusive kind of way, but more taking him for granted just because he liked her. \n\nShe got angry pretty quickly, and didnt like when Carl went out to party with us but she took every chance herself to go out and party. She never had any time for him but always had time for her friends and her partying.\n\nThis was about 2 months ago. She was at a party, me and carl was at a nightclub so it didnt really matter. Except she kissed a dude at the party. Not just a random dude either, but a guy that had been flirting with her for awhile. \n\nMorning after they had a fight and SHE \"broke\" up with him. He was ready to forgive her as long as it didnt happend again and everything. \n\nI told him to ignore her, just dont say a word to her, do absolutely nothing. He did, and now 2 months later she wants to get back together with him. \n\nMy problem here basically is that i dont like her, i dont think she deserves Carl but, Carl really likes this girl and i just want my main man to be happy.", "summary": "My bestfriend for life's \"ex\" wants to get back together, she treated him bad, but he wants her back."}
{"id": "t3_44sfsv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19 M] cousin [7 M] is an easy target for bullies but I don't know if I should do something.", "post": "First of all, I'm sorry if this isn't appropriate for this subreddit. I'll make sure to delete/repost if I get pointed  towards a better sub.\n\nSo my seven year old cousin is about to enter a new school. He's the kind of kid who bullies love to, well, bully. He likes things (shows and toys) that aren't exactly aimed for boys of his age.\n\nI personally couldn't care less if he likes Batman or Barbie. But even though I think that kids will always be mean little demons and that teasing/moking is part of growing up, I don't want him to get targeted too much. I'd obviously prefer sparing him that.\n\nOf course I don't want to tell him to just change how he is. Should I say something to him? Maybe tell his parents hoping they know what to do? (Which I highly doubt....)", "summary": "I don't want my little cousin being bullied at a new school for what he likes but don't want him to \"not be himself/loose confidence\""}
{"id": "t3_3nngqa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] with my Girlfriend (?) [17 F] for like a week, read comments (it's complicated).", "post": "So I'm 16. I never thought I'd realize what people meant about how it sucks, but it does. I'm trying to juggle crew rowing, 3 APs, and a social life. The stress is high. Recently, a lot of my friends have been talking about how they've started making out with girls, and I got a little jealous. I WAS 16 and I'd never kissed a girl before, and to be fair I'm a tad nerdy.\n\n   So yesterday I'm hanging out with my best friend, also 16 although he goes to a different school, and a good coxswain (someone who steers the boat) friend (girl), a senior at a different school than me. After I drop off my (guy) friend, I start driving her back home as well. Since we're actually good friends, we start talking candidly, and eventually the conversation moves to kissing and relationships (she broke up with her boyfriend.)\n\n \n   Before I know it, I'm asking her if she'd ever kiss me, and she said only if I don't tell anyone. So we start making out for the next 10 minutes. But today (the next day), I'm in a bind. I've texted and snapped her a few times but she's hardly replied, and her and I are meeting up again this saturday for her birthday. But I'm worried for many many reasons.\n\n1) I feel like we're taking things too fast and it'll just ruin what we have\n\n2) Although she does reply, I have to initiate the conversation first. \n\n3) I feel like she's using me as a fuck buddy (she literally said she'd bang me saturday) until she can get a permanent boyfriend.\n\n   Thoughts?", "summary": "One of my best friends, a senior girl (I'm a junior guy) made out with me.  I don't know where our relationship stands at all, and I don't know if she's using me."}
{"id": "t3_4tno8t", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[FL] Moving out, roommates staying, I don't get my deposit back until everyone else moves out?", "post": "So I am relocating to a new apartment in a few weeks and I'm trying to get everything straightened out. The company that is renting out the house I'm currently at is saying that since I'm moving out 'early' there won't be a new lease, and instead I'll be dropping from the current lease and declared 'vacating'.\n\nThat would be fine, since it's all the same to me, but they are asking me to sign a waiver saying the following:\n\n> \"Vacating Tenant agrees to relinquish all rights to any sums which Landlord may be holding on behalf of Vacating Tenant including but not limited to a security deposit, advance rent, any prepaid\n> fees or charges and agrees that nothing is owed to Vacating Tenant by the Landlord or its agent(s).\"\n\nI e-mailed the company and they say that the deposit cannot be withdrawn until everyone moves out.\n\nMy roommates are only living there for 6 more months and they are close friends, so I'm okay with dealing with this when they move out since it's only a few hundred dollars. I'm just worried about potential issues with the state of the house come that time and how much my deposit will be included in damages they do in the coming months.\nGetting the new guy (that's replacing me) to just give me the share of the deposit also doesn't exactly work, since we do not know how much of the deposit would be used in the current state of the house. When I move out it will be 2 years at that house.\n\nWhat should I do in this case?", "summary": "After 2 years I'm moving out, but I'm being declared as 'vacating' since my roommates are staying for 6 more months. Agreement has me signing away my deposit."}
{"id": "t3_10erz1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Whats something a Store Clerk/Salesperson has done or said to you that just drove you inside on the inside? I'll start.", "post": "So I'm a reader. I went to Barnes and Noble a while back & picked up a Mark Twain book.\nAnyway the lady who helped me said to go to the front to pay (I never went to B&N before this event) Its also good to note I have a stutter, so shit like my name is a pain to say.\nAnyway the lady in front said \"Do you want to sign up for our email list?\" I said No but she persisted so I just said it.\nI had trouble telling her my email, so I asked if I could write it down and she told me to just say it.\nAs I'm trying to get the letters out of my mouth she grows this smile that made me mad. It wasn't like a \"take your time\" smile it seemed like she was forcing a smile which made me pretty angry a the time.", "summary": "I have a stutter, Cashier at B&N wouldn't stop asking about my email for the email list. Gave me a smile I knew she didn't mean at all. Haven't gone back since."}
{"id": "t3_43hdns", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The new guy M(31) I'm F(23) seeing is pretty awful at texting and it confuses me.", "post": "We met online and have been going on dates for the past month. Some of the dates have last entire weekends, or whole days. He has a unique personality and I adore his sense of humor. When we're together we laugh for most of the day. He's probably the most positive and uplifting person I've ever met.\n\nBut when we're not together, it's like radio silence. He'll text me maybe once late at night with a picture or something random. He usually takes a while to respond if we text earlier in the day. Totally understandable because he has a high pressure job, and I'm not into the whole text-all-day ordeal.\n\nThis morning he flew across the country to visit family, and I figured I'd hear from him when he landed (maybe just a confirmation text that he got there safely?) but I haven't heard from him all day. I don't want to bother him if he's with his family. He has called me quite a few times, and I enjoy talking on the phone with him. \n\nLast week after one of our dates we were lying in bed and he asked me if I had missed him (somewhat as a joke, because we saw each other the day before). I told him I did miss him, and he said that he missed me and was thinking about me all throughout the day. So I asked why he didn't text me or talk at all, and he said he was also busy with work. I don't think it's that he's not serious about me. Although we haven't had the exclusive talk, I've met his parents and his friends, and it seems like it's heading in a great direction. I'm already developing strong feelings for him.\n\nI figured that would've prompted him to communicate a little bit more, but it hasn't. He's going to be away for 2 weeks, so I guess we'll see how the communication is, and if he doesn't make any effort, we'll talk when he returns. I'd like to be on the same page about it. What's the best way to approach this?", "summary": "New guy I'm seeing doesn't really talk to me when we're not physically around each other, and it's making me worried that he's not interested."}
{"id": "t3_2gw8zv", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU at work", "post": "TIFU: In the kitchen of the restaurant where I work (today was my 7th day), the county mandates that we have to wear gloves when handling food, no exceptions. So, when trying to fill cups of tartar and sour cream, I have some issues flipping and separating the cups. I thought I had a great idea: since the cups, much less the outside of the cups, are not food, let's not wear a glove; thought that cutting the tips off would be more fun. I neglected to remove my hand from the glove, and snipped the tips off my left index and middle fingers before I transformed my left ring fingerprint forever. That knife, as with all of our knives, are PARTICULARLY dull, so I had breezed that one through the (shitty) carbide pull sharpener a few times when I got in.\n\nWhen going to get a napkin to staunch the flow and then ask for a bandage, I slipped on the freshly mopped area just outside the doors.\n\nNot 20 minutes later, when returning the bucket of sour cream to the walk-in cooler, I again biffed on the freshly mopped floor of the cooler.", "summary": "Attempted to make finger-less gloves with my hand in the glove, and fell twice on wet floors, which I had not done in the last 2 years."}
{"id": "t3_10p3b8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Cousin about to marry his first love and the whole family feels it's a huge mistake.", "post": "My cousin (21M) and his fiance (18F) are planning to get married in April, they have dated 10 months now. His fiance is from London and on her father's visa. I have tried to talk with them to help them get everything together for greencard application. They refuse any outside help and insist that she will be able to stay on her fathers visa once they are married.\nMy whole family feel as if they are both making an awful mistake. His fiance is very manipulative. An example from her facebook, \"Beautiful flowers my fianc\u00e9 bought me \u2665 He bought me flowers and donuts because I wouldn't talk to him :) I was playing with him and he thought he did something wrong. How cute! \u2665\" He had just borrowed money from our grandmother to put gas in his car and same day he went and bought her a gift because he thought she was mad. \nHe went from being very good with money to being in debt and begging family for money. He then turns around and spends it on her.\nNobody can approach him about it. If they try he cuts them out of his life. They have an us against the world mentality. \nI am at a loss for how to even approach them at this point. We all grew up as neighbors and very much like siblings. It is like watching my brother go down the rabbit hole. \nI know that this is kinda jumbled so I'll provide more info upon request. Thanks for any advice", "summary": "Cousin (M21) and his fiance (f18) are making a huge mistake and won't listen to anyone."}
{"id": "t3_1yt9av", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by unlocking the front door", "post": "This past Saturday, my wife and I went out on a bike ride with two of my friends. She had just ordered some new clip in pedals and wanted to try them out. However she never practiced clipping in and out of the pedals and she ended up falling several times. Her last big fall, she ended up having a big scrape on her butt. She's been asking me to help her treat it since apparently my wife isn't that coordinated with cleaning a wound while looking at a full body mirror.\n\nFast forward to today. My brother-in-law and sister-in-law ask to come over to get some headache medicine. My s.i.l. wasn't feeling well, so I said sure. I wasn't aware that my wife was in the shower at the time. Out of habit, they both visit quite often and I usually unlock the door for them to come in. \n\nWife comes out the shower and asks for my help once again to clean her wound on her butt. I'm still very hesitant to do it for her, but I give in. She comes in to the living room and lays on her stomach with neosporin and peroxide, ready for me to clean it. PRESUME THE CLEANING! Peroxide goes on and my wife does that \"SSSSSSS\" sound when something hurts, but you don't want to let out that sound. Still, it's loud enough for others to hear since she doesn't have a high tolerance for pain. Then I proceed to put the neosporin on her butt wound. As soon as I start, front door opens and brother and sister in law are coming in. First words they hear are \"Now doesn't that feel better?\" as I rub the neosporin,a bunch of thick white pain relief cream, on the wound. My wife jumps up out of embarrassment, and runs in the bedroom to isolation. My b.i.l and s.i.l just stare at me in all sorts of what the hell did I walk in on. To save the embarrassment and awkwardness of the situation, I just gave them the headache medicine and apologized profusely.", "summary": "I unlocked the front door for my brother in law and sister in law and they end up walking in on me putting a thick white pain relief cream on my wife's ass to clean a wound."}
{"id": "t3_446ppy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Him (M43), me (F40), crossdressing, fetish, no reciprocity. Duration 16 years.", "post": "Tonight I came home a bit early and found my husband in a tiny skirt. \n\nApparently he bought it just last weekend as a lark when I was traveling for work. But now he says it might be that he wants to wear women's clothing every day at home. This is all a bit sudden for me.\n\nHe has always had a pantyhose fetish. He wants to include pantyhose in sex; otherwise he has trouble staying focused. I'll wear them, but what he really likes is him wearing them. I'm okay with this but not EVERY time we have sex. Unfortunately, he mostly seems to be interested when we include the hose.\n\nHe insists on me accepting him as he is and his fetish. Which is as it should be, but for him accepting it means he doesn't have to try sex any other way. He does not go down on me because he doesn't like it. We have no spontaneous sex because for him it's a big production with the hose and the dressing up and the setup. For two years I've asked him to indulge my super vanilla fantasy of having sex in the shower, but no - he says sex and water don't go together and that he's just uncomfortable. Basically, we do it his way (in bed in the evening, lights on, curtains drawn, with the hose) or not at all.\n\nI've always been attracted to him though because he is a big masculine guy and that is my type. I like strong masculine men. But now he wants to be feminine. Every day. At home. I have no idea how I'm going to be sexually attracted to that version of him. And he says I am cruel and unaccepting if I can't.\n\nI also cannot help but think that this is something that has been going on for a long while and he's been hiding it from me. It's hard to believe he got his first item of clothing just a few days before I caught him wearing it. And now I wonder what else he's hiding. \n\nAm I a horrible wife for having trouble with all this?", "summary": "husband has a fetish, now also wants to crossdress, is not giving in bed and is calling me cruel and unaccepting when I say I might have trouble being turned on by the new him. Am I?"}
{"id": "t3_3pfnor", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "[Discussion] How to help my sister who I'm pretty sure is depressed and in a very unhealthy and repetitive lifestyle", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nNot sure if this is the right place for this, but I feel like posting here would bring a few helpful responses so here goes...\n\nMy sister is now 25 and has basically had the same routine since she started working full time 5 years ago. She works as a chef and because of that she gets odd days off which affect her very small and very limited social life. She mostly lounges around the house watching tv and not doing much of anything and she doesn't seem to want to change it.\n\nNow I have to mention that me and her both share a handful of learning disabilities with a couple of differences, but the major ones affecting our lives would be a difficulty to communicate our thoughts and feelings accurately and the fact that we're both pretty slow thinkers. Processing information and then figuring out the proper course of action takes a while and can be easily disrupted due to horrible attention spans which makes many ordinary tasks very difficult and intimidating. Currently, her way of life is really taking a toll on the whole family (Me, my mother and father) because we all want her to not just become a slave to this unhealthy routine.\n\nThere's a lot more to this, but this is already a fairly long post so I'll try and sum things up quickly.\n\nI'm pretty sure she's depressed, so I'm going to ask her if she wants to talk to a therapist or some sort of professional, but I don't want to intimidate her into becoming reclusive about the subject. So my question is, how can I bring this idea up to her and also what else can I do to try and help her out?\n\nIt really makes me sad to see her like this. So any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Also any other subreddits that you know of that may be of help would be good to know too.", "summary": "Pretty sure my sister is depressed... How can I talk to her about seeing a therapist in a easily digestible manner and what else can I do to help her?"}
{"id": "t3_232dbu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] broke up with my [20F]. Trying to work things out then she drops this bomb on me.", "post": "Long story short me and my girlfriend of almost a year broke up for two months. In that two months I realized what I did wrong in the relationship and wanted to try and fix things. Fast forward 2 weeks after I tell her I want to try again and we are taking things slow. Then tonight she tells me she needs to be honest with me. She proceeds to show me texts from my best friend [20 M] (when we were broken up) to her about how he has always wanted to have sex with her and that he wants to come over right now and then details I'd rather not type out. This texting went back and forth for an hour or two with her feeding into everything he's saying and then the last message from my friend to my ex was \"this conversation never happened\". I had to remove myself from the whole situation after telling them both separately that they can fuck off. The thing is she claims to have been just \"playing along\" and seeing how far the conversation will go and both said they never had sex and he claims to not remember much of the convo because of drinking (which I think is bullshit). Honestly I don't even know what responses to expect, I don't want anything to do with either of them right now.", "summary": "Best friend tried to fuck my ex while we were broken up and now I find out about it after already telling her I want to work things out."}
{"id": "t3_4wc9nt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [38F] teenage boys are constantly fighting and hurting each other, and my husband [42M] continues to allow it.", "post": "My husband and I have been getting into a lot of arguments about this lately. I work most of the day and come home a little later at night. He does at home work. \n\nWe have 3 teenaged boys ( 17, 16 and 14) who are very full of energy. They love to do anything that involves being physical (sports, and working out) and I would of thought that would of supressed some of their hormones, but they still have a horrible tendacy to fight. \n\nI am not talking about the typical playful \"boy fights\" that boys seem to do, but full on fist fights. Yesterday I got a call from my husband saying my two youngest were in the ER. Apparently older brother had broken their noses in a \"little fun fight\" they were having?? This has been going on for far too long honestly, and I know boys will be boys but I don't want my boys to keep hurting each other like this, even if they claim it isn't \"serious\". \n\nMy husband says he hears them doing this but that they should learn to work out their problems, so he doesn't stop them. I'm not sure If its just me being a mom and overreacting? I can't seem to get through to him that he needs to STOP them when he hears them playing too rough. So we don't have more incidents like yesterday.\n\nIm not even sure if this is normal behavior for teenage boys. They'll seriously be angry with one another and fighting one minute, then a few hours later will be back upstairs playing video games together. \n\nI have been considering maybe taking some time off work so I could be at home a little more.", "summary": "Our teenage boys are constantly fighting and hurting each other all the time. My husband hears and sees them doing these things but does nothing about it."}
{"id": "t3_3beupx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] posted on another website looking for a blow job and my gf [18 F] saw my post.", "post": "We have been dating for 7 months now and overall things have been ok between us. The other night I came across another sub reddit which is used to give blowjobs. Long story short I posted and my gf apparently knows my reddit account and saw.\n\n   I would never cheat on her and I love her, but for some reason when posting A thrill comings over me and I just get excited thinking about all the possible responses I will get. I'm not gay, but I've even posted on men seeking men Craigslist before, just because I was horny.\n\n   I would never cheat on her, but I just wanted to post because it's a personal fantasy of mine I guess? Maybe even a fetish? I'm not sure, but I think she is going to breakup with me and she still hasn't responded. What should I do?", "summary": "posted looking for a bj because of a personal fantasy and my girlfriend saw. She is now probably going to breakup with"}
{"id": "t3_31wqqy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by speeding past a cop.", "post": "I don't know man, I was in the heat of the moment and had to choose between looking like a major pussy or being a man and owning up to my decision. What would you have done in this situation?\n\nI just got off work (12AM) and started heading home on my usual route. I enter the highway, blasting my tool CD. There was this asshole behind me who had been trying pretty damn hard to pass me even though I was already speeding and I wasn't going to let him pass (I like being alone on the road while I enjoy the music and night scenery).\n\nSo the bridge of the song comes on and usually it makes me drive faster so I'm thinking peace bitch as I press the pedal down in the Mustang GT (only an 06).\n\nSo now I'm going 140 - 160KM (I'm in Canada) and I see these two cars up ahead. I catch up to them very quickly and think I'll just slide right through these guys and be on my way. \n\nTo my horror.. \n\nI see the back of a cop car. I know I'm fucked now. It was so obvious I was speeding.\n\nNow I'm thinking, Jesus Christ, do I just slow down right beside the guy like the worlds biggest pussy and just start cruising with him? That's hella fucking embarrassing. I just said fuck it, I can't do that.\n\nSo I slow down a little and as I'm passing him I throw him a thumbs up (as if I might get lucky and get a cool cop lmao)\n\nI pass by at 110KM and instantly the lights come on.\n\nFucking unreal. I ended up getting a ticket for speeding. At least he was pretty cool about it.", "summary": "I was speeding on the highway at night and caught up to a cop and didn't know whether to slow down or man up and try to get lucky."}
{"id": "t3_1k1x6t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[21M] with my exgf [20F] - She said we couldn't talk or hangout anymore, but I am almost positive its someone else telling her this.", "post": "Me[21M] with my exgf [20F] - It was a clean breakup and we tried to be friends afterwards. We talked a lot and hung out occasionally. Recently just got a text from her saying that we should hold off on talking and hanging out for awhile. She has told me before that her current boyfriend (she started dating him less than a month after we broke up) is insecure and feels uneasy that we have been talking and stuff. I responded with something like \"If that's what you want\". Got another text later that night on the lines of \"It's not what I want\". I don't know what I should do. Should I just go with the flow and try to ride this out, or just forget about her and try to not be her friend (but she is cool and fun to hang around and really do consider her a friend).", "summary": "Think my Ex's BF doesn't want us to talk/hangout/be friends... not sure to just drop all contact or what?"}
{"id": "t3_1alt3j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend [22f] has lost all sex drive, but only after she started dating me [25m]", "post": "Title says a lot of it.\n\nShe was dating a guy when I met her. We became good friends and were able to talk pretty openly.\n\nShe would tell me she \"needed\" to have sex roughly once-a-day, good for her and for the guy.\n\nWinter break of last year comes around and she's unhappy in her relationship and cheats on the guy with me (I, to this day, feel terrible about this and have let the guy know how awful I feel about what I did). \n\nIt wasn't just a fling we were very attached to each other and I knew I loved her very quickly into our relationship. I know she loves me as well.\n\nWe never had a very good sex life (I bombed the first few times) and it has never recovered. I've tried talking about it, spicing things up, being spontaneous, etc. Nothing works. She says she wants to have sex and that we need to do it more often, but it really doesn't happen. I believe she has sex with me just enough to keep me around and keep me from having the conversation again. (roughly once a month)\n\nI want to fix this because I do love her, but she's already slowed down her sex drive. If we were to get married and have kids it would affect it that much more. \n\nAny advice?\n\nOH, i forgot to mention, her reasoning behind the lack of sex is: \"You will pay attention to me even if we don't have sex, he would just roll over and go to sleep if I didn't have sex with him\". I'm being punished for being a better bf I guess.", "summary": "GF was a once-a-day girl with her ex, sex is roughly once a month with me. She obviously enjoyed it better with him, and I can't figure out how to fix it."}
{"id": "t3_2bx087", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO [25M] of 3 years just lost 3k on a real stupid purchase, now he's mad with me [23F] because I'm not being understanding enough?", "post": "He went and bought a motorbike without getting a mechanic to check it out. A week after he loaned $3000 to pay for it, something fucked up and he had to take it in. Turns out the stupid thing has a cracked head in the engine block and is a complete write off. Worth nothing. My boyfriend said he knew that he should've had it looked at before he bought it but he was impatient and just wanted it. The guy he bought it from doesn't want a bar of it (the transaction is done). \n\nSo, I'm annoyed about the whole thing. I didn't go off at him whatsoever, but expressed that I felt disrespected, because he considered the risk he was putting both of us in (we share incomes), but went ahead with it anyway. Now he's pissed at me because I'm not being understanding and want him to find a way to fix the issue. He says that I'm getting angry. I thought I was just telling him how I felt.", "summary": "Boyfriend loaned $3000 for a motorbike without getting it checked out. It turned out to be a lemon, I got annoyed and now he's pissed off at me."}
{"id": "t3_swkig", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Promblems. What do? Also, what are your crazy prom stories?", "post": "Taking a girl A as friends to prom (she has bf in college) and semi-dating other girl B at high school. Girl B and I aren't going because we agreed to go with our friends' groups. Girl A and I are really good friends, have been all year. Turns out she might have the hots for me, but she also seems to be pretty flirty with most people (but a little more physical with me). Girl B has been sort of busy lately/distant, but still seems interested. Girl A is hotter than Girl B. Who should i try to hook up with?", "summary": "taking girl with college bf to prom, have thing with other girl, who should i try to hook up with? Also crazy prom stories."}
{"id": "t3_154o3e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Why hasn't he made a move??", "post": "I'm 25/f and he's 34/m, both of us are single parents. We've been quite a few dates without the kids. We've also gotten together a few times with the kids. The most physical contact he and I have shared is a hug at the end of every date. Last week we went we out 4 different times and we text everyday. \n\nAnyhow, he invited me over to his house this weekend to watch some movies (without the kids!). He's the first guy I've gone on more than just a few dates with (I've been single for way too long)  and I think I've forgotten how this works, ha. Why hasn't he made a move to hold my hand or kiss me? I'm going with the assumption that he's into me on some level (considering how often we talk and go out) but what's going on? \n\nShould I make the first move this weekend? HOW do I make the first move?! What if he hasn't made a move because he isn't actually INTERESTED. Oh my word, I need some help! Am I overreacting? I probably am.. Any advice would be super.", "summary": "Single mom (25) and single dad (34) talk every day and see each other a few times a week. Not sure why he hasn't made a move yet."}
{"id": "t3_2hg5aw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] of four months, she doesn't trust women around me.", "post": "My girlfriend and I met at work, but got together after I switched jobs so that there wouldn't be any workplace drama. We have been together for 4 months this last Sunday. I have another female friend who I've known for 2+ years who I hang out with fairly frequently. She is straight, but we have no romantic interest in each other whatsoever, and we are both cool with that.\n\nAbout a month and a half ago, my girlfriend approaches me very angry saying how she's upset that I sat next to my friend while watching a movie (even though I was actually sitting in the middle between the both of them). I try and find out why she's upset about this, and apparently she had been holding in her frustration for a while. Before she moved back into town for our college semester to begin, my female friend moved in a week early. Having not seen her for a large amount of the summer, we hung out a lot during the week before school. My girlfriend was not in town for this whole week, and when she arrived that weekend, I got a call that I needed to come home for family reasons. My girlfriend described her anger with this situation as \"You got to hang out with HER for a whole week, and when I got here, you leave me!\"\n\nAfter a while of fighting, I ask her why she's not upset when I spend time with my large amount of other friends (some of which are also female). She said that \"I don't hang around other girls. I don't trust them, all they do is make drama. Girls and guys can't be friends without any romantic interest. I'm tired of girls stealing my boyfriends from me, and I don't want to lose you.\" She now gets upset about me texting my female friend, sitting next to her in any situation, or even bringing her name up in conversation. She's been going through a lot of family problems lately as well, so I don't want to break up with her and shovel even more problems onto her shoulders. What do I do?", "summary": "Girlfriend doesn't trust women, especially around me. Gets angry whenever I mention my female friend around her. She currently has family issues and I don't want to add more problems by breaking up. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_osqmv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Care to share an event you experienced as a kid but never knew what really happened until recently?", "post": "Events which really needed some insight in order to figure out what really happened (nothing too traumatic).\nHere's mine:\n\n* I wasn't a really great student back in grade 2 and the teachers really were scared of me. One day we had a math test; and math was just *not* something that I grasped at the time. For some reason I understood what was to be tested that day, I didn't really buckle down and study, I *just understood* out of nowhere how to do the questions. The teacher marked our tests really quickly and handed them back so we could go over the answers. She comes to me to share what I did for a fairly \"complicated\" question and then asked me how I got it right. **I couldn't tell her why**. I wasn't a great learner at the time and couldn't give her a logical reason, but clearly, I had work written out for that question. I said I forgot how I did it, and the teacher eyed me and said \"Hmm, that's weird I guess that happens sometimes, when students just *forget* how to find the answer\" and she moves on. So I think about it today, and it's very obvious she thought that I cheated; and at such a young age too! Sort of explains why I wasn't a very favored student among the staff.", "summary": "Surprisingly does well on a math test, couldn't explain to the teacher how I found the answer --> Teacher thinks I cheated but never confronted me about it"}
{"id": "t3_1v9a4d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[19 M] found a Woman [26F] I like, but i think there might be a problem", "post": "So like It says, I found a woman that I like, and she likes me, but there might be a problem\n\nSo first some background:\n\nI met her a couple of days ago through a mutual friend. We'll call her M. Me and M got to talking and we both seemed to feel kind of an instant spark between us. Besides the age difference we both have a lot in common, we both like video games, animals, watching movies, you name it. \n\nSo the potential problem: \n\nWe were talking tonight and during our conversation she told me she had been diagnosed with BPD ( Borderline Personality Disorder) which is a real mental health issue. So my question is, even though we get along great, and really like her, should I cut loose? Or should i give it a chance?", "summary": "Met a great woman, but turns out she had BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder), should i stick around or bounce?"}
{"id": "t3_1mac5s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[f/24] am introducing my son[3yo] to my BF[23] of 1 month next week... Would like some advice please!", "post": "Okay, a short back story for clarity:\nI have never introduced a significant other to my son since his father and I split up a couple years ago. I've tried to make it a point to not parade men in front of him, and to be honest, I haven't felt serious enough about any of the men I've dated to even consider bringing them around.\n\nSo I haven't really spent a lot of time considering the possibility of what could happen when someone finally does meet him. \n\nMy current boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a month. I had toyed with the idea of bringing up meeting my son to him, but decided it would be best to wait until he brought it up, because that would mean he's ready for it.\n\nHe did bring it up, and now we are planning an outing to the zoo together, just the three of us. \n\nHere's where I need some advice, or perhaps a similar situation that one of you may have gone through to comfort me a little. \n\nI'm definitely beginning to fall for this man. He is wonderful in every way so far. But what do I do if this ends up being too much for him to handle? I would like to be able to talk to him afterwards and ask him if he is still sure he's interested in pursuing this relationship after seeing a glimpse of what my child is like. Is this an appropriate thing to ask/talk about, and if so, how soon should I bring it up? \n\nI feel it's important to mention as a side note I bought him tickets to his favorite musical as a surprise (and they were not cheap!) and was planning on giving them to him as a \"Thank you\" after our date, but I am afraid that if he decides he isn't ready for something like this, he may feel obligated to stay with me after I had spent a small fortune on him... Should I still give them to him then, or wait?", "summary": "New boyfriend is meeting son, need to know when it's the right time to talk about things, and if its appropriate to give him a gift."}
{"id": "t3_3hslqt", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Any way I could make a girl feel better by telling her she looks good?", "post": "This girl I know well has often said she looked bad. Be it clothing, weight,her dress choice,etc. I have said she looks great after telling me she improved on her weight, she still was kinda nervous like adjusting her clothes and hair and trying to make it seem like she never mentioned anything, she did smile a bit and said thanks. Her dress according to her was bad so she changed it for a different one and I said you looked great and she told me how she exchanged her dress for another and why, going on and on. I told her dont worry you looked nice and she seemed okay. \n\nI feel like I could say something to her so it just makes her feel good or boosts her self esteem.Its not exactly low, just an effort could help. Do I just tell her she is beautiful or gorgeous? Or should I do it some other way like compliment her clothes? I know body parts are a definite no. I have heard girls like compliments overall and it makes them feel pretty and good, not generalizing, but saying that being nice could not hurt\nAny ideas or advice would help me here", "summary": "Girl is very conscious about herself and how she looks. She naturally looks good, but how can I tell it to her so she feels good about herself?"}
{"id": "t3_22hsg5", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "The rest of my family is pretty overweight...I'm not sure how to tell them I want to lose weight.", "post": "This has been a problem for me ever since I started wanting to lose weight - I started taking birth control and gained weight back to my highest, which really is only 30 pounds over my GW and technically not even overweight. \n\nMy mother, father, and sister are all overweight - my sister unfortunately did not get my genes, and has been this way all our lives despite eating basically exactly the same as I did. My mother has been overweight my entire life. My father as well, though even more-so now that he's getting well into his 50s. \n\nWhenever I want to tell my family that I want to lose weight, I feel guilty, almost ashamed. All I can think is that I'm insulting them. I'm 'the pretty one' according to my sister, my mother has tried to diet and has failed, and going to them, saying I want to lose 30 pounds when I'm technically not even overweight (I'm relatively close - 5 or 10 more pounds would do it) feels like a slap in the face. I love my family. I don't want them to feel like I'm judging them. My sister is gorgeous. My parents are wonderful, beautiful people. I would like to have their support, but I don't think I can ask for it. My father, especially, wouldn't give up junk food if I asked them to do it with me...and asking them to do it with me feels like an even bigger slap in the face. Like my own weight loss goals are just a ploy to get them to eat healthier. \n\nThe problem is when I'm home, which will be really often soon, there's all kinds of junk in the house, and my mother hates to cook so will often want to opt for take out or order in stuff that's really high calorie. I'm worried it'll only make my weight loss harder. \n\nMy mother is really sensitive, and so is my sister. I'm kind of lost here.", "summary": "My family is wonderful, but not necessarily fit. I want their support, but I don't want them to think that I think they're ugly and fat, because I don't."}
{"id": "t3_2ixf91", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[19 M] with my[23 F] friend who has a LDR, wants to keep hanging out.", "post": "I first met this girl through an mmo mobile game, called ingress, where you have to meet others in order to play the game, near March of this year.\n\nWhen I first saw her, I couldn't believe she was actually playing the game to begin with. In my mind I kept going, \"what are you doing here, you are defenitely out of place\".\n\nI just shrugged it off and didn't think much of it, because I never thought that I would ever really create a relationship with her to begin with. A few months pass and I decide to chat her up. \n\nSuprisingly, she responds and we end up messaging each other past till one o'clock some nights. Eventually we hang out and we head to an ingress related event in another major city close by. \n\nBut, before we leave she hits me with the boyfriend card. So the entire day of the event, I was devastated. \n\nAfter the event, I\u00b4m still talking to her and hang out with her a few more times. It was all fine until, one day her bf, when we were hanging out, flipped out on her and they had a huge arguement about him being jealous. \n\nAfter that I\u00b4ve tried my best to cut down on communicating with her, which is tough because she still plays ingress as much as I do, and avoid hanging out together so her bf won\u00b4t get jealous again. \n\nBut now, she wants to hang out again, and I\u00b4m starting to think that she only wants to hang out to fill that void, that her bf can\u00b4t fill since he is somwhere else or she is just trying to make him jealous again. \n\nSo I just wanted to ask if I should hang out with her again or bail on any plans that she wants to make.", "summary": "My attractive friend wants to keep hanging out even though she has a LDR and she knows that he get's jealous."}
{"id": "t3_33g1qd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[28m] My girlfriend of 1 year [25f] has been out of town all week and has barely contacted me. Should I be concerned?", "post": "She left for Boston last Thursday. We finally talked on the phone for about ten minutes 4 days later on Monday (after calling and texting Sunday night and never getting a response), and once before that for a couple of minutes when she was drunk and wanted to bitch about her friend. But other than that she's almost avoided contacting me entirely.\n\nI texted Friday night and she didn't respond at all. I saw she logged onto Facebook through her phone about 4 times after though, so she had to have seen it. She finally texted back the next morning saying she went bar hopping with friends and her phone died, which was a lie since she logged into facebook intermittently all night. I also saw through instagram that she was at a party, which she left out.\n\nWhen she HAS texted me, it's been short sentences, and it's only been in response to me. If I hadn't initiated contact the few times she's texted me, I'm not certain I would've talked to her at all.\n\nShould this be a concerned? Should I just stop contacting her and see what happens, or is that too passive aggressive?", "summary": "girlfriend out of town and doesn't seem to want to talk to me. Says her phone keeps dying but I can see that she's on Facebook mobile"}
{"id": "t3_50n7ap", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do you move on from an emotionally abusive relationship?", "post": "My BF (24) and I (F: 25) had been officially dating for about 2 years and been together almost 3. Since the beginning of this year he's been lovey dovey one minute and as soon as an issue comes up and I try to fix/discuss it with him (usually about him staying in contact with his crazy ex who tried to break us up and come between our relationship), or we have a fight, he threatens to leave me. I have been anxious and on edge for this entire year and I have been incredibly unwell both physically and mentally as a result. He officially left me just now (again) over an Instagram instant message after ignoring me for almost an entire week (ignoring is a method he likes to use sometimes - when I get \"too much\" or too \"annoying\" he threatens to ignore me or leave me and I have to be the one to apologise or come running back). I have been nothing but loyal and we have had some super amazing times together, we really were best friends but what I've been put through has really damaged me and convinced me I'm a horrible person and everything is my fault. All I've tried to do is resolve issues and fight for our relationship so we can be stronger, but he just wants the relationship when it's \"easy\" (his words). He has pretty much gone for good this time. How can I get over something that has caused me so much anxiety? We spent so much time together so there is a massive void in my life and I feel so lost. I do hang with friends, have hobbies and bury myself in work but I need some guidance - something to motivate me to keep going. My strength and fight within myself is just gone and I don't know who I am anymore. TYIA", "summary": "how do you get over an emotionally abusive relationship, where everything is always blamed on you? How do I get over that void, the pain, the fear and my anxiety and move on to happier things in life?"}
{"id": "t3_1dodvl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My(23F) Roomate(20f) is sabotaging relationships with mutual friends and I don't know what to do anymore.", "post": "Hi; first of all I live with my boyfriend in his mothers old house which we rent with 3 other roommates. This girl just so happens to be the girl that took his virginity 3 months before we started dating... so it's a little rough for me to be living with her in the first place.\n\nLately she's been really catty and treating me like shit. She gets really snippy, yells at my dog, and had a bitch fit because I was doing laundry yesterday??? Well, I overheard her talking shit about me to a friend, saying I'm annoying and all I do is eat the food in the house. Ok; first of all, I'm 10 weeks pregnant, yeah I'm going to fucking eat. Secondly, she doesn't buy fucking groceries anyways, I only eat what my boyfriend and I buy.\n\nAnyways; now all of our mutual friends are treating me weird whenever they come over, like they are afraid to talk to me. I pulled one of them aside and asked wtf was going on... and he said that she's having a cow over living with me and that she can't wait until I move out etc etc. Which whatever, I'm happy to get away from her too, but I don't give a shit about her.. I care that she's potentially trying to turn people against me that I care about.", "summary": "roomate is a catty bitch and I don't know what to do about her making our mutual friends not talk to me anymore."}
{"id": "t3_1271aj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, did I act like a douchebag?", "post": "So my girlfriend and I were done with dinner and decided to go to this micro brewery bar. We walk in and this large bearded bartender yells at us \"We're closed!\" I think \"Uhh what? it is Saturday at 6:30.\" However, the bar was pretty empty and it looked like majority of the patrons were tabbing out. I, thinking this is probably a joke, continue to walk in with my girlfriend. The burly bartender again yells, \"We're closed!\" but a little louder this time. I think \"Eh, well that is weird\" and start to walk outside and say to my girlfriend \"Come on baby, they're closed.\" As I am just about to get to the door I hear someone, probably the other few bargoers, telling me that the bartender was just joking. I get outside and my girlfriend says \"Come on in he was just joking.\" I say \"Fuck that that was disrespectful. I can spend my money somewhere else.\" Later, she told me she wished I would have sucked it up and gone in and gotten a beer with her but wasn't overly upset with me for how I acted.\n\nA part of me feels like a douche, but another part feels like I was justified to be somewhat insulted and not wanting to spend my money there. I felt stupid for believing that they were closed and being able to be tricked and didn't want to go in and hang out with those people. What do you think?", "summary": "was tricked by a bartender into thinking a bar was closed, walk out, girlfriend tries to get me to go back in and I refuse."}
{"id": "t3_kvbkq", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "[x-post from r/AskReddit] Every day I see a kid getting bullied, and I don't know what to do.", "post": "I get the bus to work most days, and each time I'm on it, there's this group of rowdy schoolboys sitting in the back seats, shouting and swearing and generally being teenage boys.\n\nThey get off at the stop that this sweet little boy (let's call him Fred) gets on at, even though they all go to the same school. Fred is tiny, only about 4'6\", whereas these others boys are well over five feet tall. When they get off, they push him and shove him around, laugh at him and shout his name and cat-call and whistle at him. Every day, he gets on the bus close to, or in, tears.\n\nI realise this isn't the full extent of the bullying, it's only the tiny portion I see, and nothing makes me angrier than a group of bullies ganging up on some defenseless kid.\n\nI really, utterly detest the thought of just being another onlooker, watching the mob and doing fuck all to help the victim, but I have absolutely no idea what to do. I know Fred's first name and his and the bullys' school, so realistically I could call them up and do something about it, but I feel like that would be interfering and I'm worried it might make matters worse for Fred. I've considered talking to him on the bus, but again I don't want to interfere and I don't think Fred would appreciate knowing just how visible his pain is to people.\n\nShould I just let it slide and mind my own business, or should I try to take action?", "summary": "little kid is getting bullied by big kids, I'm a bystander and don't know if I should get involved."}
{"id": "t3_225fj5", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[27 M] with my friend [24 F] of 2.5 years, can't tell if she wants to just be good friends or something else.", "post": "My friend has a cheerful and flirty personality, and lately we have been spending more time together. She is usually the one setting up these platonic hang-outs. I genuinely enjoy her company, and am satisfied with being just her platonic friend. However, I've always found her stunningly gorgeous, and have often day-dreamed about what it would be like to make out with her. But I've always held back, not wanting to ruin a meaningful friendship.\n\nToday she asked what my plans were for the evening, and after telling her my two options, she said, \"ok I may join you at either place\"  And recently, she's made it a point to tell me when she's made out with someone, which I suspect might be a move to make me jealous.\n\nAm I being oblivious? Does she want more, or does she just want to be good friends? Would I ruin a friendship by attempting to kiss her if the moment is right?", "summary": "Can't tell if my female friend wants to be more. I want to make out with her, but don't want to ruin the friendship. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4yvctc", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Is 4.8% APR high when the contract rate is 4% on the mortgage?", "post": "quick background:\n\nBuying a house, going conventional with 3% down to avoid lifetime PMI on an FHA loan. Pretty far into the process and the broker runs some numbers (he said they were on the high end) where the contract rate was 4%, the APR comes out to 4.8% and that seems like a pretty big jump from contract rate to APR, almost a whole percent.\n\nTalked to the broker on the phone and said it seemed like a pretty big jump and he thought i was looking for hidden fees or something, I really wasn't. Although he suggested that it may be higher because I was only putting 3% down.", "summary": "Is there a general rule of thumb of how much higher the APR should be over the contract rate? I feel like 4.8% on a 4% contract rate is high for 3% down on a conventional mortgage."}
{"id": "t3_zwu1s", "subreddit": "college", "title": "No social skills, is that a problem?", "post": "r/college, I'm a natural introvert.  I don't really have much in common with my generation.  I don't like rap, I can't dance for shit, and I don't really like the taste of alcohol.  Add some social anxiety to that and you've got my current situation.\n\nI'm a month into college, and for four Fridays and Saturdays, I've sat in my dorm room doing absolutely nothing.  Browsing Reddit, playing Xbox by myself, usually offline (the wifi is spotty on the 12th floor), things like that.  I look all around me and see people connecting.  I have made two or three friends while I've been here, but the awkwardness and hesitation plays into me not really actively trying to hang out with them.  I'm usually okay on my own, but lately I've been feeling kinda lonely.  I really don't know how to push myself to go do things or meet people I don't expect to have anything in common with.  \n\nIs there anything I can do?  I WANT to meet people.  I WANT to find someone who I really do connect with.  College is usually the place to do that, but it seems I'm not doing well with it.  Part of the reason I feel so isolated is because my major is Language Studies and I want to get into the JET program to teach English in Japan, which inevitably means I'd be leaving the States after college.  It feels like anything I would try to create now, relationship or friendship, would automatically have a time limit on it.  I'm not the partying kind of person.  I'm not a drinker.  I don't smoke cigarettes.  Haven't met anyone who smokes weed but I really don't want to get caught high/in possession, especially my freshman year.  I'm sorry for the wall of text but I needed some place to vent tonight.", "summary": "introvert me has made a grand total of 4 friends while in college, high school friend who came here included.  Don't connect with others on almost any level, feel like social pariah.  Wat do?"}
{"id": "t3_1u746o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] broke up with my girlfriend [21 F] of 1 year. Her immediate rebound and history of depression is worrying me.", "post": "I broke up with my girlfriend a few weeks ago. It wasn't sudden, it was something that we had talked about over the last month. She was absolutely devastated though, and completely heart broken. As much as I still care about her and remember all the great times we had, it was something that I needed to do.\n\nWhen we broke up she said that she loved me more than anyone before, and wouldn't be able to easily get over it.\n\nKnowing that she has struggled with a lifelong battle of depression, I wanted to make sure that she was doing okay by checking in with her friends. To my surprise I find out that she has started dating a heavy drinking and druggy kid she knows and removed all of our pictures together on social media outlets just days after the breakup. I can say with confidence that there was no prior kindling of a relationship between them beforehand.\n\nI don't feel good about this. Especially with her history. I got to know her very well, and I loved her for a long time, but this, its not right. I am very worried about her.", "summary": "My ex-girlfriend with a lifelong history of depression seems to be rebounding in a very worrying way. What can/should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_29m16w", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Ladies, should I confront him about his baby that's on the way?", "post": "I have a coworker [M, 25] that likes me [F, 25], and he's been trying to go out with me for months now, ever since he broke up with his ex GF. He first asked me out at the end of last year, but I told him I don't think it's a good idea to date coworkers (especially since we work in a very small office, and I didn't wanna be his rebound anyways). \n\nHe's still unrelenting - always complimenting me, flirting with me, suggesting date ideas, etc. Honestly, I like him too, and I was just about to finally give in when... \n\nAnother coworker in our office told me that this guy is expecting a baby with his ex-GF. She's about 6 months pregnant now, which means that he's probably known about it, and HID it from me, the entire time he's been coming after me. Everyone in the office seems to know except me, which is weird because he usually tells me all his secrets and doesn't tell anyone else. The other day, in front of a new coworker, he flat out DENIED ever getting a girl pregnant when the subject happened to come up, and I desperately wanted to call him out on his lie. \n\nDo you ladies think I should confront him about it? I feel used/deceived. Why would he know he's got a baby on the way, yet hide it from me and still try to ask me out? Even if I didn't like him like that, why would he keep it from me as his friend? It's hurtful that he would feel the need to exclude this life-changing event from me. \n\nAdvice? Thoughts?", "summary": "coworker who's been trying to go out with me for months has a baby on the way with his ex-GF and is actively trying to hide it from me. Should I confront him about it? "}
{"id": "t3_1rsn5b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my boyfriend [23M] of 3 years. Feeling financially insecure around the holiday season.", "post": "This one won't be too long. I am finishing up my bachelors on Dec 15th, but also working a [very] part time job at my local vet hospital. So basically, I have a very small income after I pay my bills (unfortunately, bills are still due in December!). My boyfriend G, has been helping me pay for some of my family's christmas presents and he knows that I am unable to reciprocate for his family. He has a pretty good teaching gig and makes a steady paycheck. He told me he doesn't want my money (in regards to paying him back for my family's presents). I still feel like this isn't right. After graduation, I will be working more hours. Should I let this go? He really is helping me out A LOT, but we're not married and I don't want him to feel like he has to give me money for things like this.", "summary": "Boyfriend has been helping me buy xmas presents for my family that I can't afford on my own. He is helping out a lot and I love him. I just feel really bad and don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1erxmm", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Girlfriend [18F] is too attached for me to leave her. Please help.", "post": "So the other day my girlfriend for 6 months and I [18M] had a bit of an argument which lead to us talking about us breaking up. She told me that if I ever left her, she would still love me and wait for me to love her again even if I was dating someone else. She said she would never date anyone else again after me and even if she did, she would still have feelings for me and try to find some parts of me in that other guy.\n\nWhile this was an incredibly sweet thing to say, it comes at the wrong time for I feel myself losing feelings for her. I fear that we don't have enough in common (in fact we're opposites and in this case opposites don't attract). \n\nI don't want to treat her poorly and get her to leave me and stop loving me because I can't do that to her, but I feel like we should just be friends. How can I do this without treating her terribly while also getting her to lose feelings for me after time too? I don't want her to be the kind of obsessive ex. \n\nI've been trying to give her subtle hints that I'm not happy with her (no sexual contact, trying to keep the conversations short, spending less time with her).", "summary": "Girlfriend says she will always love me right when I'm losing feelings for her. How do I break up with someone who's so attached to me without treating her poorly?"}
{"id": "t3_2f5nxl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my girlfriend [22F] of 2 months, mild ex problems.", "post": "Last night my ex (who of which broke up with me a year ago and in somewhat neutral terms) has been texting me quite a bit more since my current relationship began. My ex invited me to a party but I declined. She then mentioned how she missed being able to call me at 5am to talk about any problems and such. Most of this she texted to me at 5am. \n\nI don't really know what to say to my ex. She mentioned that she doesn't want  to intrude, and I understand that. But I don't think it's necessary to cut ALL contact from her, it would hurt her if I refused to speak with her at all. \n\nI showed my girlfriend the text messages she sent. I was not going to hide this, she has every right to know. My GF was really hurt and pissed off at her, explaining how disrespectful it is because my ex was being very personal to me especially that she messaged me so late. \n\nSo now I'm in the kitchen alone 4 hours after I showed her the messages. I asked my GF if she was feeling better, she isn't. I'm giving her a little space at the moment while she sleeps so hopefully it helps. She's being very distant both physically and emotionally. It's hurting me too. Advice?", "summary": "My GF thinks I'm \"talking\" to my ex, even after I told her three times that I don't."}
{"id": "t3_u1rjv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Looking for a Sushi Rice recipe that incorporates mayonnaise in the rice itself.", "post": "I used to frequent a sushi place in Nashville, TN called Samurai on Elliston place.  The owner was Korean and his name was Mr. Kim (Yes, I know that's about like saying Mr. Smith).  The last time I went in, a number of years ago, I found that he'd sold the place.  I was told that he moved to Alabama.  If this rings a bell with anyone, I'd love to know where he ended up.  \n\nAt any rate, it was the best Sushi I've ever had and I know he put Mayonnaise in the rice.  So, does anyone have such a recipe?", "summary": "Would like a sushi rice recipe with mayonnaise like the one at my favorite sushi bar that was sold some years ago."}
{"id": "t3_2lpp83", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [21M] follow up with her [18F] about a date?", "post": "I met here on okcupid, we've been texting/talking for a little over a week, there is some. On Thursday I asked if she was doing anything this weekend she said that she was probably going out with friends but she'll get back with me on Friday to see if we could go out for coffee.\n\nFriday, I shoot her a text following up, she said she was busy so she couldn't. I just said you can't blame a guy for asking, she just said yea and laughed. I left it at that, now I don't know what my next move should be.\n\nI don't know if that was a straight rejection or if she's not interested. She seems cool and has no problem talking with me. I really do want to meet her in person. Should I cut my losses/fade or should I text her asking for another meet-up/date?", "summary": "Talking with girl  I \"met\" on okcupid, not sure if she's interested but I still want to meet."}
{"id": "t3_d0z82", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Stolen Laptop--Any Igoogle Gadgets to log IP so I can find who stole it?", "post": "My Laptop was stolen over the previous few days out of the back of my car and I am wondering if there is any way I can track this guy down.\n\nI have iGoogle set as my homepage and if he is stupid enough to get online and use any of my browsers he will arrive at iGoogle.  If there is a gadget that can be used to track IPs and times when they were accessed that would be exceptional.  \n\nI have already checked the link at the bottom of Gmail that lists the last activity on my account and it has turned up nothing unusual yet.  I'll continue to monitor that link for anything suspicious, however I am a bit scared here.\n\nI use xMarks to save my bookmarks and passwords and have already changed my pin and password for that, however I am just wondering if there is any way to track this guy down.  Only days ago I found out about logmein and installed it on my desktop and was putting off installing it on my laptop until the weekend--a little too late :-\\\n\nReddit, I need your help on this.  I'm a computer science major at MTU and would really like you guys to shine through.  The laptop has my only copy of an Android application that I have been working on for the past semester as I wasn't keeping it on our CVS server.  I need this laptop back and have filed a police report already.\n\nAs a reward I give you this video and will give upvote karma to those who deserve it.", "summary": "I am looking for a way to track this guy down and I feel that an iGoogle gadget is my best chance at this point as it is my homepage.  I need your help, Reddit."}
{"id": "t3_16twp4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [M/22] convince my GF [F/20] that we can manage long distance?", "post": "My gf and I have been dating for a little more than a year after meeting at university. About about halfway through, I graduated and left university. Since then, we've been doing long-distance, but it's only about a 2 hour drive (I understand this is not a vast distance). Since then, I've tried my best to visit, sometimes she does (once every 3 weeks at most, typically every two weeks with back-to-back weekends not uncommon). She can be a bit needy and clingy. I try to cater to those needs, within reason. I send care packages, talk to her often, and do my best to spoil her when we do see each other. I do my best to keep our romance.\n\nHowever, when we are apart she finds herself sad and second guessing the relationship. She's apprehensive about our future because it is highly likely that we won't ever be in the same city for the foreseeable future. In spite of this, I'm fully committed to her. She is a good person, the type of woman I want to be with and have a future with. Unfortunately, she's apprehensive because she sees sadness as a component of being long-distance. For me, I'd rather try my hardest and potentially fail doing long distance. For her, she'd rather get out now than to hurt more later. However, she says she sincerely wants to be with me, but is unsure and unconfident in my abilities to fulfill her needs in a relationship.\n\nWhat can I do? How can I show her that we can do long distance and still have a healthy relationship?\n\nOr do I have to accept that this just won't work out? That the best thing I can do for her and me is to just let things go? I just have a hard time accepting \"long-distance\" as a reason to break-up, when I know full well how happy we are when we are together.", "summary": "GF thinks being long-distance involves being sad for a majority of the time. How do I convince her that it's still worth it?"}
{"id": "t3_3dow9f", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "I have a question about work related injuries...", "post": "The statue of limitations may be up, but I got injured on the job a year and some months ago. I slipped and fell at work and landed straight on my butt. I was okay after it happened, but later on the nerve pain hit. I finished my shift and went home. The next day it was awful and I went to talk to the manager about going to the hospital. She was totally rude and so was another manager. That's a whole different story. I was only able to go to one place (manager told me this), so I went. I got x-rays done, they thought I broke my spine. I didn't, just some serious nerve inflammation. It did show that I was starting to form DJD. Ever since that accident, I've had chronic back pain and chronic sciatica. I'm pretty sure this helped speed up my back issues. I am now disabled to the point I have to walk with a cane and at times a walker. I'm 23 years old with degrees in Healthcare and can't get a job in TN at all. (It's an at will state. I walk in with a cane and they'll say \"You don't have enough experience, sorry.\" My degree has some HR background, I know how it will go.) I'm just wondering if there is anything I could do. I went through hell with that company (big chain). I was discriminated against, talked down to by management  (GM for that matter) and I feel like this has ruined my life. Just because they didn't want to clean properly. Like I said though, statue of limitations might be up, but I'd like to see if I have anything before contacting an attorney. I kick myself in the butt I didn't back then. Any advice given would be nice. I appreciate everyone who read this wall of text! I can PM details if need be.", "summary": "Company didn't clean properly. Fell and busted my ass. My back permanently screwed at 23 and can't work anymore."}
{"id": "t3_2lq032", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [20/m] am in love with a girl[19/f] with a sex problem (commitment issues?)", "post": "Background on her and our relationship: she didn't have a glamorous childhood. parents were divorced early, went through multiple marriages and significant others each, abandonment from her father who recently has come back into her life, and worst of all she was sexually assulted/raped as a teen by a neighborhood friend which cost her her virginity. We have been together for about a year and a half now. I'm not her first long term boyfriend, but she often says that no one has ever shown her love like I have. \n\nWe have recently been through some turbulence, as we've recognized issues within our relationship we find unhealthy and are working to either correct them or move on. After weeks of feeling like we were finding our way on the right path, yesterday she broke down to me and admitted that she thinks she may have a sex problem after confessing to sleeping with another man (who she also slept with while we were dating) In her own words, \"I know I love you, I know you are the perfect person for me, and I know it's must be hard to understand, but when someone gives me their undivided attention and shows me that they love me, even if I know they don't, it's hard to say no when they come onto me sexually.\"\n\nRegardless if we date again or not, above everything else, she is my best friend, so when she came to me with this problem I wanted to do anything in my power to be there for her and support her through this. I know admitting that to me wasn't easy. so my questions for you, reddit, are:\n\n1) how should I approach the situation to most benefit her\n\n2) Has anyone been in my shoes before, and if so, do you have any advice?\n\n3) Has anyone been through what she is going through, problems with sex or commitment, and if so what got you through it? Is there something you wish you or someone such as a close friend would have done to help you?", "summary": "(ex)Girlfriend having problems with controlling sexual urges/ staying committed, and need advice on how to help her through it."}
{"id": "t3_2sny9f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my ex [18F] of 3 years, says she still loves me but has a sort-of boyfriend, not sure what to do", "post": "sorry for the really bad title, it was pretty hard to try to explain this situation in a sentence.\n\nbasically been dating this girl for 3 years in high school, overall it was a good relationship; we had fights every now and then and ive had my doubts but overall it was good. then college came and she moved across the country. we tried long distance but decided to break up. \n\nfirst quarter of my college passed. Im a commuter to a small college while she dorms in a college in a large city. i basically made 0 friends while she found plenty of male attention. long story short, one night stands aside, she has a boyfriend of sorts (not official but basically) now.\n\nwhere I come in is that when we saw each other again during winter break, she told me about her life and it really hurt my heart (even though we were technically no longer together). week or two later were acting like were dating, she and i basically fell in love all over again. now she is going back to new york to her other boy, and saying since the relationship, even if we make it an open one, wouldnt work we should be just friends.\n\ni have no idea what to do, should I hold onto her as just a friend that I talk to on facebook or skype, should I hold on to the hope that she will just come back to me, should I just forget all about her and try to move on with my life? our connection is still very real and she said she would treat me the same way whether were friends or in an open relationship or not. im emotionally crazy right now, im on top of the world when shes around and lamenting the thought of her not being here with me and potentially never being so when im not with her. all of this stacks onto my anxiety, self-esteem issues, and my crippling fear that i will never find a girl as great as she was /is.", "summary": "still in love with my ex, she returns my feelings but still plans on going back across the country to her college and (basically) boyfriend, no idea what to do"}
{"id": "t3_j6c2i", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Finance advice for someone living in Mexico?", "post": "Been lurking for close to a year now, I recently found this subreddit and the advice I've found around here is simply fantastic. I think this is the subreddit for this, if not, sorry!\n\nI've devoured most top links and started reading \"I Will Teach You To Be Rich\" and I'm loving it so far (A Random Walk, Intelligent Investor, and Millionare Next Door are on the list). It comes at great time since I've been meaning to get my first credit card and savings account. \n\nNow, the thing is that while the advice is sound and I can follow the general outline of it, things in Mexico are different. For one, I can't seem to find anything similar to a Roth IRA in that it's tax free. Also, creditdit lines, APYs and pretty much everything is inferior.\n\nI guess what I'm asking is, can anyone recommend a book or point me in a direction where I can find good relevant info about funds/bonds/banks/good investing companies or even ways to invest in the same way as if I lived in the US without getting gang banged by fees would be truly appreciated.", "summary": "Always had in mind investing, a lot of advice doesn't really apply to Mexico. Sources or plain advice will earn you enchiladas."}
{"id": "t3_2bh6ks", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Interview Question about online university", "post": "So I had to finish my last 2 years at university online because of affordability and illness. It was in a regionally accrediated state school out of state (so it was still 100% legit, and all my exams were proctored). I got better after the first year, but I had to finish online because many schools around me require the last 60 units to be done from them, so that would have required an extra year in school for no reason.\n\nAnyways, they always ask me \"How was it there? How was the weather?\" There was one interviewer that seemed turned off by the idea saying I was sick for a year and that's why I had to do that, I even mentioned I'm no longer sick. I couldn't tell if it was because I said online or because of my illness.\n\nSo is it smart to only bring up that I just couldn't afford the university I was going to before? Which is true. Do I not bring up the fact I was sick? Do I mention that all my courses were 100% the same as on campus students?", "summary": "Went to online school (regionally accredited) because I was sick/poor, how do I assure employer that it's the same thing?"}
{"id": "t3_12ob4q", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I (23/M) be more comfortable with my girlfriend (19/F) seeing other guys", "post": "I'm using a throwaway because my girl will go on reddit sometimes.  Title pretty much says it all.\n\nWe've been together for about a year and a half.  The first year was great, we lived close to each other and spent most of our time together.  Then she had to move with her parents ten hours away from everything she's ever known.  So we've spent the last six months long distance.  She started school and everything was going well for the most part.  We've had our issues here and there but we've mostly worked through them.  Things have still been pretty good despite our random arguments.  I would say we're both a little over protective of one another, probably even more so now that we're about 500 miles apart.  And here's where I need advice.  She recently started talking with one of the guys in her class and they want to get together and work on a take-home test with each other.  Because of my past, I've had some trust issues and this situation seems all too familiar with me.  Previous ex went and \"studied\" which really was just her studying the guys dick.  So because of this, I'm feeling uncomfortable with my girlfriend going and studying with this new guy she met.\n\nI understand deep down that my fears are irrational and its not fair to her to compare her to my ex.  I want to be okay and be care-free about who my girlfriend hangs out with and stuff but I'm just uncomfortable with it all.  It's really consumed my thoughts for the past few days since she told me about what she was going to do.  I feel that if she was going to study with a girl, I'd be perfectly fine with it, but since its a guy, I  feel uncomfortable.  I would never tell her to not go and study with him because I don't want to be that guy and that would probably only push her away.  So how do I overcome these thoughts about what could happen?  How do you be comfortable with this?  I feel that these are probably my insecurities talking, so what do you do to become more secure?", "summary": "Long distance girlfriend is going to study with another guy and I feel insecure/uncomfortable with it.  How do I become okay with this?  How do I become more 'secure'?"}
{"id": "t3_2701jy", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Disqualified. Now what?", "post": "I got a letter in the mail saying I've been passed up for being hired for my dream job. I wanted this job for 10 damn years and now it's over. I've trained my body, mind, and soul for this job and just through a simple letter, I've been removed from that process. \n\nI was in good standing with getting hired. Passed everything with flying colors. Nailed the interview, scored good on the tests, passed my background investigation. All that stress and time I put in for this job was for nothing. \n\nWhat am I going to tell my co workers? My friends? My family? How am I going to deal with this? \n\nWhat am I going to do with my life? I've worked so hard since I was 14 to get this job so it's pretty much the only thing I'm good at. I've made so many sacrifices to get it and for nothing. \n\nI needed this job. I need to move out of my parents house. I need to pay off my debt. I can barely afford my car payment.  \n\nNow what? Am I to live with my parents the rest of my life? Am I to never get my dream car? Am I to just keep my job where I only get paid minimum wage while I make the company tens of thousands? \n\nI don't know what to do. I mean my second dream job would be to work with penguins, but I don't think that's possible for me. \n\nAnyone have any advice for me? What should I do?", "summary": "I followed the yellow brick road  for half my life and ended up at a complete dead end and I can't turn around to go back."}
{"id": "t3_dwzzz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hello Reddit, I have a serious question on the topic of introversion versus extroversion", "post": "Something I often see discussed on Reddit, especially in threads about relationships, is the idea of introversion vs extroversion.\n\nThe scenario typically involves the OP asking for some sort of dating advice because they have never been good at talking to girls, have never been in a relationship, or something along those lines (in other words, the \"nice guy\" problem).  In almost every such thread there will be someone who brings up the idea that OP and the vast legions of us who share his problem, are introverts.  An introvert being someone who is content being alone and pursuing solitary hobbies, as opposed to an extrovert who is most comfortable in the presence of other people.\n\nI was thinking about the idea of introversion and there's something I don't quite understand.  A lot of the self-proclaimed introverts seeking relationship advice are clearly unhappy with themselves, or at least, unhappy with their current situation, and see their \"introversion\" as a curse.  But by definition, wouldn't a true introvert be someone who is genuinely content with their relatively solitary lifestyle?\n\nIs it possible that a great number of struggling \"nice guys\" are not truly introverts, but rather, people who strongly desire the company of others, but merely lack the social skills to obtain it?  Does it make sense to describe someone as being a frustrated extrovert unable to satisfy their social desires?\n\nI don't know much about psychology, so it's entirely possible that I don't properly understand what it means to be introverted or extroverted.  I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on the subject.", "summary": "By definition, isn't an introvert someone who is CONTENT with a solitary lifestyle?  Can one truly be an introvert if they are unhappy with themselves for being so?"}
{"id": "t3_2v5tqs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (22F) boyfriend's (23M) disability might be causing friction...", "post": "Hey /r/relationships,\n\nFor some background, my boyfriend has oculucutaneous albinism. Essentially he has pale and sometimes translucent skin, very light blonde hair, and his eyes move back and forth due to a related condition called nystagmus. \n\nMy boyfriend thinks that he has faced a good deal of discrimination due to his disability. He goes as far as to say that people don't want to really get to know him because of how he looks. He has very few friends, but the ones he does have are very close friends. I'm not sure if he's right or not, but I do know I enjoy spending time with him and really can't see why his personality would turn people off. \n\nNow for the friction. He and I have decided we are going to be entirely honest with each other. This means telling each other things that aren't always pleasant. \n\nThe fact of the matter is I have a good friend who has told me flat-out to dump my boyfriend because he looks weird. (She even pointed out the moving eyes and hair) I have a few others who have disapproved of me dating him because they don't find him attractive enough. Of the several friends who have met him or seen his picture, only one hasn't implied or outright told me that my boyfriend is unattractive because of his condition. \n\nI have told him about all of these interactions because we both promised total honesty. Also, I think I may have made a mistake recently. A guy in one of my classes was hitting on me (even though I told him I have a boyfriend).  My BF asked me who I found more attractive and I told him that I find him more emotionally attractive but I find the other guy more physically attractive. \n\nNow my boyfriend is acting very distant and I'm not really sure why or what to do. Please advise reddit.", "summary": "BF has albinism. My friends want me to dump him for it. I told him about it and now he's distant."}
{"id": "t3_45zq34", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my ex teacher[37M] we kind of dated for 2 months, and now he wont leave me alone", "post": "So i made the mistake of having a small fling with my professor. I know this was extremely dumb of me and I regret it. I was insecure at the time, feeling lonely, it was exciting.. I made a mistake and gave in to what was wrong. Nontheless, as soon as I got my head on straight I ended it. It was never 'healthy' and I was just confused. He was in a bad place in his marriage and enjoyed talking to me and misinterpreted friendship for something more and went after it. I, being young and just not in a very good place, was curious and gave in. We hooked up for a few months and I really hated the person I was becoming. I ended it and he did not take it so well. Its been 5 months since I told him I was not interested in anything but a professional relationship with him. And he still has not accepted no for an answer. He emails me and begs me to reconsider and give him a real shot one day. That he will wait for me. I'm not sure how to make myself more clear. He says he needs to talk to me and get closure. That he has things he needs to say to me that he's kept bottled up for the last few months and needs to get off his chest. I told him that he wouldn't find the closure he needs by talking to me. That he really should talk to a therapist or a professional because I am not qualified to deal with this. He has this delusional idea that he's in love with me and claims we are soul mates. The last thing I want to do is add fuel to the fire.", "summary": "I was a dumbass and had an affair with my married professor and now he's not handling the fact that ive ended it."}
{"id": "t3_vzp1s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "New girlfriend going out on a ladies night, is this normal?", "post": "The short story here is that I don't have a ton of dating experience. I was in a relationship out of high school where I ended up getting married, fast forward eight years (25 now) and I am dating someone new (same age as me). I guess it should be fair to mention that my ex did cheat on me (not physically but had an emotional affair) and I'm no longer with her.\n\nI've been dating this new girl for a few months, she's incredible, we spend a lot of time together, and I've got an amazing connection with her. Truthfully I know in my heart that she'd never cheat on me like the last, she's genuinely a great girl who's never given me any reason to not trust her, but I think I am now carrying forward this small bit of trust issues from my previous relationship. I never used to be a jealous person or have trust issues and I'm getting smalls bits of it with this new girl which I know isn't fair but the feelings are hard to fight. \n\nSo she's going out on a ladies night, and I find out that she's going to be drinking with her bud at this event and dancing. Am I crazy for not liking the fact that she's dancing with other men? She's made it clear that it's country dancing, line dancing, etc, nothing like how I'd normally dance (grinding and whatnot) and that it wouldn't be with just one guy and has said all the things I want to hear like she'd make it clear she has a bf if they bring it up etc, but I just personally feel like dancing is an intimate thing and am having a hard time coming to grips with being cool with her out dancing with other guys.", "summary": "Girlfriends going out on a ladies night, dancing with other guys and I'm not really cool with it.  I've approached her about this and she doesn't see it as a big deal, am I overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_2s6e0u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] have been stressed about feeling like a \"sugar momma\" to my boyfriend [23 M] for months now", "post": "I know money shouldn't be a problem aspect in a relationship but it has been really bothering me. We have been together for almost 6 years.\n\nMy SO has been struggling to find a stable job and bought a car too soon and any money that he does make goes to the car. He bought the car 6 months ago thinking he'd get a job which he didn't. He's struggled with having a good job for the entirety of our relationship. I can understand when we were young, but he finished post-secondary before me and has had double the time to look for a job than I have. This makes me think he's lazy.\n\nHe doesn't mooch and he never asks for money unless he is desperate - he has never asked *me* for money. I've been paying for all of our meals out and even his fast food/snacks when we're together for a few months now. I would feel guilty if I didn't because I don't want him to go into debt or feel he can't enjoy himself with me and our friends.\n\nI know I shouldn't be that typical girl that thinks \"oh the guy is the one who should be the supporter\" - I'm all about equity in a relationship and splitting things financially. It's hard to not want my guy to take care of me though. I'm all about being a strong and independent woman but when I see or hear about other relationships where the girls are always being taken care of financially it's hard for me to not want some part of that. It really bothers me to think that I'm like his \"sugar momma\" right now. \n\nI want to move out of my parents house and buy my own but I can't and don't want to do it alone. Right now I feel like I am. This stresses the hell out of me. How can I deal with this? I personally gotten him two jobs (through my own connections), both which haven't turned out - what more can I do?? How can I not let money bother me in our relationship?", "summary": "Paying for myself and SO for meals, entertainment, etc. Saving for a house and feel like I'm alone. I feel like a \"sugar momma\" and I hate it."}
{"id": "t3_2b821s", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [17/m] feel guilty about my feelings towards my recently single friend [17/f]", "post": "Crossposting from another sub because this seems more suitable.\n\n**Sorry in advanced for any typos or unclear sentences, I'm drunk and typing this on my phone.**\n\nOk so flashback to the day before yesterday. One of my close friends [17/f] broke up with her boyfriend (another friend of mine) because he treated her like shit etc. She called me [17/m] up before she did it because she wanted me to be at her house for emotional support. We hung out for a short while but I had to get home before it was too late because I had work really early in the morning. The next day (yesterday) I got off at 12 (short shift) and went over to her house because she wanted to hang out again. We started watching a bunch of movies (we have a giant list that we want to watch because one of us hasn't seen it), but halfway into the second movie we were a bit buzzed from wine (not enough to cloud judgement) and we started playing this weird game (or whatever the fuck it would be) where we try to not have the other person blow in your ear and the one who was trying to blow into the other's ear was \"losing\". Idk, shit was weird. Anyways, this led us to a lot of contact and getting very close to each other. There were points where I was so close I could feel our lips slightly touching and I wanted to kiss her so, so bad (and I think she might have wanted to as well) but I didn't. Once we both started to lose energy we just lied down on the couch and started kind of spooning while she was grasping my hand. This part was post buzz (about 4 hours after alcohol kicked in).\n\nI loved that day. We had so much fun. I want to start a relationship with her. I felt the same way about her 9 months ago but I thought I was over her. But I know it's wrong. It's wrong because she just got out of a relationship and it's wrong because her ex is one of my friends. What do I do?", "summary": "didn't realize I'm still hung up on my friend, who just got out of a relationship, and I think I may be getting some very strong mixed signals"}
{"id": "t3_1x33n1", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Feeling agitated about the lack of communication skills exhibited by the contact person at the service that provides our officiant (All Seasons Weddings). [my first Weddit rant]", "post": "Edit: what a convoluted title. \n\nI am so frustrated. We received an email from our wedding coordinator informing us that it was time to choose an officiant from the service (All Seasons) that is on contract with our venue. We went to their website and selected an officiant that really jumped out at both of us and submitted their web form, formally requesting him. A week later we received an email from them saying, \"[Venue] has contacted us to say you are getting married there. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding, it's time to pick an officiant and confirm all of these details regarding the location, date, time, and overall vibe of your ceremony.\" I replied back saying I had already been in contact to request an officiant and I answered ALL of her questions, and said that we were still in the process of confirming our ceremony time and that I would let her know ASAP. The next day I emailed again to confirm ceremony time, and within ten minutes I received a reply from her saying, \"Thanks for confirming your ceremony time, can you answer everything else now?\" Uhm, I already did. So I replied back answering all of her questions again and reiterating our interest in this one specific officiant. Three days go by and I receive ANOTHER email from her saying, \"Great, now all that is left to do is confirm your ceremony time and we can check if the officiant you want is available.\" Arg! I just don't understand why they can't pay attention to the things that I've emailed them. Should I send back one email reconfirming all information start to finish? I think if I get another email asking me any of the same questions again I'm going to go nuclear. How hard is it? We are paying you $380 to officiate our wedding, I'd think the least you could do would be pay attention to us when we contact you.\n\n/rant.", "summary": "Officiant service keeps sending us emails asking the same questions over and over and I'm feeling pretty agitated about it all."}
{"id": "t3_4gjv7y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [19 M] having trouble forgetting my [19 F] ex of 2 years at same small college.", "post": "I've been dating this girl since my junior year of high school and we always had each other in mind when going off to college.\n\nNow we go to the same school and I broke things off with her after 2 years because I started to realize she didn't care about my personal interests and I did not get to enjoy a lot of things with her.\n\nHowever, she has been my best friend for 5 years now and I just can't forget about her. I went to a party at another school and met someone else but I had to stop talking to her because my ex is still on my mind. She has also been telling me about the great times she has been having since we broke up and she's \"living life.\" Maybe it's jealousy, but these thoughts never escaped my mind.\n\nI've been very frustrated with her trying to tell me how great her life is. I tried talking to her last week about this, but she saw a physical mark on my neck from said party and she refused to talk to me for a week until I begged her to let me explain.\n\nNow that she listened to me, I don't know what to do with myself. She sort of hates me but I'm still craving the relationship we used to have or even just to have her friendship back.\n\nI know most people on here and other people I've talked to say let her go, never speak to her again, but I see her everyday and my emotions get the best of me.\n\nSo my question here is what should I do about where I stand with her and what should I do to move on?", "summary": "Broke up with gf of 2 years, been best friends for 5 years, see her everyday and can't get her off my mind. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_1gyvsd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30/M] always have a bit of trouble sealing the deal: transitioning from flirty talk and clear signals of interest to actually doing something about it", "post": "Let's limit my question to parties where there are a bunch of folks who at least all share the host(ess) in common (as opposed to bars). I have no problem connecting with strangers in this type of situation and love to engage people and talk.\n\nOccasionally, I'll click really well with someone. We'll have had a great conversation, a lot of flirting, and there's clearly some interest. But when it comes time to actually ask the person out/suggest they come home with me, I freeze up and end in a, \"Welp! Great talking to you!\"\n\nI find this applies both to potential casual hookups and potential dates. Though there is more pressure if it's a potential hookup.\n\nI feel like there is never a good time to ask either question. I feel like everyone around us is watching me and listening in, waiting to hear me ask this person this question and either ready to laugh or shake their heads in solemn shame.\n\nThis happened twice this weekend. Saturday party, met a fantastic woman, but could not bring myself to ask her out (though, she is the sister of a friend, so that added a bit of pressure to it). Then, Sunday BBQ at my own apartment, cute girl shows up, is clearly into the idea of maybe sticking around until morning (the hints were not very subtle, and I was totally into the idea), but I just can't make it happen because she's my roommate's girlfriend's friend, and I feel like they'll get all judgy. Even though they'd probably encourage it in the end.\n\nI met my last girlfriend at a party in this sort of situation, but could not bring myself to ask her out in front of people, and instead found her and messaged her on Facebook (which she was surprisingly ok with). I'd like to not have to do that again and just ask someone out like a normal person.\n\nAgain, I generally have no social anxieties and can hold myself in a crowd of strangers. But this triggers some sort of fear in me.", "summary": "How can I get over this perception that I'm being watched and judged every time I try to ask a girl out/over? This strikes more fear in me than actually being rejected by the person, honestly."}
{"id": "t3_4gussq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [00 M/F] with my ___ [00 M/F] duration, short-description Me (16 M) with my girlfriend (16)have an almost 1-month long relationship, and I've got quite a problem missing her...", "post": "Well, it's not like this is going to be a long story or anything, it's just that I'm having quite some problems missing my lovely girlfriend. Our relationship started in the beginning of this April, in that time we've both had a week of vacation where we didn't see each other (we did text though, so no worries there ;) ). And now she's going to England for another 8/9 days, and this really is very hard for me. Mostly because I just want to be able to physically be with her... \n\nIt's not as if I don't want her to have a good time in England or anything, it's just that I really don't want to not see her for more than a week. And I just don't really know how to deal with this emotion.\n\nAdditionally, I'm pretty concerned about the potential consequences not seeing each other enough in the first weeks could have for the rest of the relationship.\n\nAnd, just in case you were wondering, I really love her and I'm not planning on leaving her anytime soon :)", "summary": "How do I deal with missing my loved one? And can not being enough with each other at the start of a relationship become a problem in the future of the said relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_3azsc3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25/M] am not relaxed with my girlfriend (25/F], but very relaxed with all other women", "post": "I have been dating my girlfriend for 2,5 months now and everything is pretty great. She is very relaxed, wants to have fun without worries and has never actually given me the reason for not being relaxed with her. Yet i am. \n\nWhen we started out, i didn't care much about it and where will it lead so i just went with the flow and been perfectly relaxed with her, teased her, joked with her...Now that i truly care for her and she is constantly on my mind, i have become unrelaxed in order not to say the wrong thing, not to fuck it up, not to give her any kind of wrong impression. \n\nI am very relaxed with all other women, even those who try to hit on me, because i don't give a damn about them, i simply do not care what they will think of me, so i come from a place of grounding where i can joke around, be playful, tease, laugh, smile a lot...\n\nReddit, how do i fix this? I have tried convincing myself \"not to give a damn\" about her as well, but when i try to adopt that mindset, i suddenly, well, start not to care anymore, stop being thoughtful, stop giving her attention etc...\n\ni have tried relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, but it seems to only work partially...", "summary": "i am unrelaxed with my girlfriend, but very relaxed with girls i don't care about - how do i fix this?"}
{"id": "t3_4lerye", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] with my [19F] Date canceled is this a flake (Chat log included)", "post": "So the title is pretty much the whole story we set up a date and the day before I wake up to this:\n\nHer: Hey I'm so sorry but is it possible to postpone coffee tomorrow until another time. One of the girls last night cut her hand open and i have to cover her shifts.\u200b\n\nMe: Yeah sure no problem\n\nHer: I am super sorry\n\nMe: hahah all good some other time then :)\n\nHer: Definitely\n\nMe: Do you work full time?\n\nHer: Well i will be for the next few weeks. Not normally though\n\nIt sounds like a pretty legitimate excuse to me but the last comment has me thinking this is her way of pretending to be busy. I just wanted to see what you guys thought she seems like a nice girl but i'll be honest I can't be stuffed talking to her for the next few weeks trying to get a date in.", "summary": "We had a date set up and she canceled the day before seem's like a flake but not 100% sure."}
{"id": "t3_4i1ynk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] mother [50sF] uses the wrong name when she's upset with me", "post": "I realized tonight that I can't seem to figure out this situation.\n\nI'm transgender (female pronouns), and have been using a new first name since about October. She's very supportive and uses my new name all the time. Sometimes she slips up and uses my old name, but corrects herself right afterwards.\n\nThe problem is when she's upset with me. Every time, without fail, she uses my old name without correcting herself. It feels like shit and makes things worse because it doesn't exactly put me in a mindset to try to resolve things.\n\nI'm recovering from a long period of depression and inactivity and there is A LOT going on in my life right now. I'm trying to stay afloat at a new (wonderful) job, which is difficult after such a long time of inactivity. Coming home, I just want to hide in my room and shut down for a bit. Instead I'm expected to help with anything she wants me to do at a moments notice, and when I say no she gets upset and calls me by my old name. \n\nI told my boyfriend about it and he thinks she does it to hurt me. I found myself coming up with all sorts of excuses for her behavior. She only does it when she's stressed or unfocused. Then again, today she used it three times in a row. When I corrected her, she said \"Sorry.\" in what felt like a rather unapologetic tone. \n\nI need some outside perspective here. I'm looking for rooms to rent to live somewhere else, but I don't know when I'll be able to find anything. Am I being unreasonable when I need time alone, and refuse to drop everything whenever she needs something done? Does habit and stress excuse her from calling me something that's hurtful to me? I really don't know.", "summary": "My mother calls me by a name I had for 21 years that I severely dislike whenever she's upset with me. Is she trying to hurt me or does her stress excuse it?"}
{"id": "t3_4xyzod", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Wife not interested in sex two years after her emotional affair", "post": "I [M40] have a very beautiful and sexy wife [33] and have been married 8 years. We have two young children of 1 and 5. About two years ago i found out that my wife was having an 'emotional affair' with someone who she worked with. This lasted about six months and he even left his wife, at least partially for her. She denies that anything physical happened, but they went on coffee dates etc.. and there were clearly inappropriate moments and probably text messages. She refuses to go into detail saying she doesnt want to hurt me. \n\nI cant change what happened and actually dont think I really want to know the extent. She said she is sorry for what happened but doesnt take full responsibility and partially blames what happened on my long work hours and work stress which she says affected our relationship. We had a very rough patch but she eventually ended contact and they no longer work together. We had our second child after that, but things have never been the same. \n\nWe hardly ever have sex (about once every 4 to 5 months) because she says that she doesnt have any libido and has also suffers with very bad dyspareunia. She is pretty affectionate but she resists any physical advances from my side and says that she needs more time. She has been seeing a gynecologict for over a year but things are not better. \n\nI am at my wits end. We used to have great sex, about twice a week at least. I cant help but think that there is more going on. We have tried therapy but things are not better. I have considered hiring a PI to follow her and find out if something else is up. I have directly asked her if there is somebody else or if she has contact with the 'other man' who is now divorced. She denies anything and this has led to huge fights. I am desperate to have my wife back!", "summary": "Wife had 'emotional affair' two years ago. Despite ending this we still have almost no sexual relationship. She blames this on libido and dyspareunia. Worried that she still has contact with 'him'"}
{"id": "t3_2max6q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [27F] tell a guy [30M] I haven't met yet I've lost interest?", "post": "This dude [30M] and I started talking on OKCupid back in August and it was fine, we chatted and decided to meet up sometime except he kept picking really inconvenient dates I couldn't make so we haven't actually gone out on any dates yet. But we kind of kept talking, and over the course of our conversations, I discovered out that, he texts a ridiculous amount and is persistent to the point where it's kind of annoying, and also at 7 am. I have my phone on don't disturb, so I don't really care, but seriously, who texts that stupid early? \n\nAll that (and the fact that when we text or call, the conversation is never really that interesting and I get kinda bored) has caused me to lose interest. For a while, I was actually super busy and wasn't able to really respond to his 'hi' texts for a solid monthish. Or his phone calls. I was secretly hoping that he would lose interest, but oh well, he didn't.\n\nI don't want to actually meet up with this guy. But I don't want to be a dick about it and string him along (I don't really think I have because we still haven't met up or anything, and haven't really talked that much). How do I tell him politely that I've lost interest and am no longer interested in meeting up and get him to stop texting me all the damn time? Is there a nice way to actually say these things? I feel kind of bad for not saying something sooner, but oh well. That's why I'm asking here. It's not like we're even breaking up or anything because there wasn't really anything there to begin with.", "summary": "Met a dude, talked for a little bit, never met up, lost interest in him and no longer want to meet up, how do I tell him to please stop contacting me?"}
{"id": "t3_1aam4z", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Gf (24/f) won't give me (25/m) BJ's.", "post": "In honor of steak and BJ day, of course...\n\nWe've been dating for 6 months or so. Other than the occasional small argument we may have (nothing major), things have been good. She's probably one of the smartest girls I have ever dated. Our personalities are pretty similar and we get along well.\n\nI would say she is somewhat \"sheltered\" when it comes to sex, it seems. She isn't into wearing lingerie or anything, and when we first started dating she told me she had never seen porn. For Christmas I had playfully suggested my present should be her in sexy-times clothes. Yeah, don't think so.\n\nOn top of this, it became incredibly obvious after a few months of dating that a BJ was never going to happen. I mean, not only has she never made a move, but after bringing it up I was immediately told it made her feel \"uncomfortable\".\n\nSo, here I am, on steak and BJ day... and I really want a BJ. This is actually the first girl I've ever dated that has not gone down on me, and ironically, it's the one whos company I enjoy the most. I should also point out I have no problem with going down on a girl, and I have even done it to her once, but I obviously am not going to continue go down on a girl that doesn't return the favor.\n\nI guess I have 2 questions:\n\n1. Am I being ridiculous for ultimately thinking this isn't going to work in our current state;\n2. Has anyone ever even worked themselves out of a situation like this? I mean, even if she did give me a BJ, I can't imagine it is going to go well, or that it would happen often (at all?).", "summary": "Gf won't give head, never has, it will probably be terrible anyways. Other things good. Sex is important to me. Breakup?"}
{"id": "t3_26adjh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M18] don't know how to feel about this.", "post": "Not sure if this is the right place for this but here goes. \n\nOkay so I have been going out with a girl [F18] for over a couple years. I thought all was okay, we've had arguments here and there but nothing abnormal. This girl was in love with me as she stated and basically what happened hit me like a freight train. \n\nWe've been going through a rough patch lately and she's recently told me that she wants a break. Her reasoning being that she is too dependant on me and needs to learn independence for herself. That she has to learn how to be okay without me. This really baffled me since I thought the point of a relationship is being and going through things together. I thought the point WAS to be able to depend on your SO. \n\nShe says she's been thinking a lot about our relationship lately and listening to others about things (who knows what to possibly lead her to this) and she decided on a break. \n\nThis shocked me completely. I'd have never thought she would do this. She's told me I was the love of her life and we've been through so much together. And I honestly just can't understand where she is coming from. \n\nTo me this just feels like an excuse, but I don't know. I'm lost, torn, broken. I'm not sure how to feel about losing this girl. \n\nTo me, her asking for a break was as if Mr. Rogers had just flipped everyone on his show off and burned his sweaters: You'd think that would never happen.\n\nBut it did, and now I'm stuck in a state of confusion and sadness. It really sucks. I'm not sure what to do or how to feel. \n\nSomeone, please shed light on this situation for me. Is it over for good? Whats really going on here? What do?", "summary": "Things were seemingly going well when suddenly girlfriend of a few years wants a break from our relationship, and I just can't comprehend it."}
{"id": "t3_2qxyi3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to stand up in a loft bed while a fan was on at full speed.", "post": "This actually happened on Saturday, but I'll get to the story. It's about 2 AM on Saturday and my SO and I are having a good time up in the loft bed. I'm on top and my SO asks me to spin around. Instead of spinning around as I usually do, I (like an idiot) decide it would be a better idea to stand up and get back on again obviously forgetting that the fan is on, at full speed naturally. \n\nAs I attempt to stand up, the fan clocks me right in the side of the head just above my temple. My head whips to the side from the force of the blow and I fall down clutching my head. As I'm laying there trying not to cry, I hear me SO ask if I'm okay. I try to compose myself before asking and my SO asks me to please say something or at least make a noise.\n\nMy SO is freaking out because I might be knocked out and it would be weird to try to explain to our parents why I had to go to the hospital. Through gritted teeth I manage to say \"I'm trying not to cry\" as I sniffle and the waterworks start. My SO holds me and tells me it's okay and I'll be fine. Then we both start laughing after my SO says that even though it hurt, this has to be the funniest sex injury. But boy did that kill the mood. \n\nThe next morning I wake up to a numb on my head about an inch or two long and about a half inch tall. Swallowing hurts, chewing hurts, yawning hurts, and basically anything that requires jaw muscles hurts. I think in a couple days my head wound will be completely gone, but I can manage a lot of things with a minor twinge of pain.", "summary": "four days ago I stood up in SO's loft bed during sex while fan was on, ended up with a large bump on the head that has not fully healed."}
{"id": "t3_jt8fh", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I feel like I was mocked by my college advisor.", "post": "I took a break from college. Got some work experience, and this year I decided to go back. I have difficulties. I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis when I was 17 and got it treated, but it's left me with severe stomach discomforts like IBS. I've found ways to manage my symptoms. Primarily each fresh foods, eat at certain times, and make sure I have a toilet ready at this particular time. If anyone else has dealt with this and can give me some advice on further treating or managing IBS those are definitely welcome.\n\nAnyway, as my title read. I was talking to my advisor in his office today and I told him about my situation and told him that I have extreme difficulties leaving my house to attend 8am classes. He told me that I would have to \"go cry and beg to\" <insert chairman's name>. I feel like he mocked me and after dealing with IBS for 9 years I don't appreciate it. It has actually upset me a bit. I feel like I should man up, confront him about it, and tell him that I don't appreciate what he said. My first day of classes are tomorrow and I have a giant gap I can use to talk to him.", "summary": "I feel like my college advisor made fun of my IBS, and I don't appreciate it. What would reddit do?"}
{"id": "t3_13jm2g", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the most ungrateful thing you e ever see a Person Do?", "post": "I have this friend who lives in Europe. we were friends since around 9 and we still talk. so I get a call from him (note he is a ps3 gamer just like me) and he asks me to get him a game called ghost recon future solider. I knew that games in there cost double and I'm going to see him in the summer so I say why not and buy him the game. Fast forward to the summer I go and see him and I give him the game (along with a few other games that I don't play) He seems really happy so I go and watch him set it up. After he sets everything up he starts raging because the DLC passport for multiplayer is region locked meaning he couldn't play online. Being a gamer myself i seem sorry because I know that's why he plays games but he then try's to exchange it with a game store in another CITY! Since I was getting tired I ask if I can stay at his place and he says yes. Come morning I fix the problem by logging in my account and downloading it on his ps3 he thanks me and plays it like there wasn't 1 hour of rage last night.", "summary": "Op buys game for European friend DLC to play online is region locked, he rages and tries to exchange it i end up downloading it with my account"}
{"id": "t3_2rad2l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28/m] with my [27/m] friend (2+ years). Did I mess up trust?", "post": "So I have a close friend of mine of a few years who was talking to me about his girlfriend, and told me a few things. Said not to repeat it to anyone. Fine, no problem.\n\nHowever, a random friend I have mentioned something about the girlfriend along the lines of \"hey shes cute! What do you think?\" (just random guy BS talk), I simply stated that \"you wouldn't really like her I think\".\n\nHe of course, asked why. I replied with \"just some things I was told in confidence, cant say\".\n\nI feel like I screwed up. My friend of course dropped it, and that was it. It's just I feel I should of said something silly, or stupid, to blow it off, not what I did. It was the first thing I could think of without saying anything I shouldn't. Am I just being stupid here? I just feel bad about it.", "summary": "Friend told me a secret. I feel like I indirectly mentioned I \"knew a secret\" but couldnt say it to another friend. Did I betray his trust?"}
{"id": "t3_3xuk5o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] got dumped by my significant other [18 F] 3 months ago. She found someone in 2 months.", "post": "We are both in college, but we went to different colleges and agreed that we will work things out for the long run. However after a month into our semester she called me and broke up with me out of nowhere because she didn't see us lasting forever. The first month was surreal, I didn't know what to do so I just ignored it. The second month I started drinking a lot especially by myself and my grades suffered a lot. \n\nOur winter break started and we live in the same hometown. So I wanted to hang out with her to see if I can change her mind, but wanted to wait till she had time to hang out with her friends and family as she usually leaves for a week for Christmas. \n\nI then got a text saying that she met someone a month ago and that they're dating. I'm heartbroken when she said this, worst of all is that I asked her if she can say that she doesn't love me anymore so I can start moving on but she said she has feelings for me and that she doesn't love the new guy (only a month into the relationship so I guess that makes sense). \n\nI want her to still be with me, I want her to give me a chance, I don't know what I should do. If I should give up on her then how do I move on? I've had insomnia the past couple of days and lack of appetite since she has told me.", "summary": "Girlfriend of two years breaks up and finds someone new after two months. However she admits to still having feelings for me, and I want us to still be together."}
{"id": "t3_2d0nrn", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Losing a lot of weight has really made me understand why hot girls are so bitchy.", "post": "I have recently lost a good amount of weight [cw 138 lbs. sw 205lbs].  I was a sweet fat girl and I'm still nice.  I've been getting a lot more attention from guys lately.  Recently I went to my SO's 10 year high school reunion where upon my husband was openly congratulated by a drunk guy for 'scoring' me. I thought this was super flattering and would never imagine in my wildest dreams this would happen to me in real life. I was having a reasonably good time until my husband decided he needed to go to the bathroom. I was sitting alone at one of the party tables playing a game on my iPod touch when ol' drunky comes up from behind and places his hands squarely on my shoulders and says, \"Where's your husband.\" After telling him he's in the bathroom drunky says, \"Well that's too bad.\"  In a super fucking creepy voice. So I move to shrug his hands off of me and they don't budge.  So I get up and start walking and drunky starts following me!  He stopped following me when I walk up to a group of guys talking.  At first I thought this incident was funny.  *Haha some drunk guy being silly* but then it really scared me.  I was practically invisible before , just another fat girl. But now, people see me, men see me and most of them are nice but some of them are definitely not.  I've never had to really fear for my safety until recently and it's truly bizarre.  I really understand why hot girls are such assholes all the time now.", "summary": "Drunk guy aggressively hit on me and scared the crap out of me.  Scared for safety and now know why hot women are assholes. [More] on how I lost the weight."}
{"id": "t3_3kqje4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 MF] wants to break up with me after about [29 F] 5 years of knowing each other and several months relationship, wants to break up if I don't become a feminist.", "post": "Last night I was talking with my girlfriend, things have been rough this month. Everything was going smoothly, nothing out of the ordinary and we began discussing about feminism. I don't actually remember how it came about that but it did. I asked her if she was a feminist and she responded with of course I am. We both live in separate countries (me USA) and my experience with feminism is extremely toxic, she lives in Sweden where its #1 country for feminism (I'm not surprised). She was saying things like how women get paid less, etc. Me trying to not argue with her, doing my best to be logical. She told me don't you want women to have equal rights? I'm like yes of course, but that doesn't make me a feminist. The word itself 'feminism'- isn't equality by itself, that is fighting for women's rights- I'm not going to go into that because that's just- another topic.\n\nSo after discussing about that she kept telling me, you're either a feminist or I'm breaking up with you. My brain 'blue-screening' figured she was just making up an excuse to break up with me but shes being dead serious I believe. Everything else makes sense, her attitude towards me at times or how I just want sex only, it really bothers me and I tell her that. I've been in a feminist relationship before and it was pretty toxic and feel like if I try to reason with her it's just going to end bad now, now that we know we aren't both feminists. \n\nI just don't know why I can't agree to certain aspects without calling myself a feminist cause I'm not, there are problems too with men's rights and not just women's.", "summary": "GF wants me to be a feminist like her but I don't completely agree with feminism, agree that genders should have equal rights, gf wants me to be feminist or we break up."}
{"id": "t3_26hygq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M], want to break up with my girlfriend [29 F] of 2 1/2 years. Is it bad to wait it out until after her college grad?", "post": "Alright, so I've been dating my girlfriend for the past 2.5 years, but I've decided that it just isn't working out. We both want to go in different directions, with her settling down and having children, but me still wanting to visit the world that I have been saving up for the past few years.\n\nThe only thing is, I've been thinking about for months, but I can never see a proper time to do it. Important events to her keep popping up, like Valentine's, her birthday, or in this case, her graduation (coming up on June 6th). The thing I'm wondering is, would it be better to wait it out until a \"restful\" time comes, or should I break it up as soon as I can?", "summary": "Been thinking about breaking up for months, but can never seem to think of the right time to do it, and could use some advice."}
{"id": "t3_3nq645", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] just broke up with my GF [21 F] of 3+ years and I feel like ive made a huge mistake.", "post": "Towards the end of our relationship it just seemed like she was always mad at me. It got to the point where we would argue about literally everything. Her birthday just passed and I spent close to $400 on it, and yet she still had an attitude and gave me the hardest time and that when I realized that maybe we just are not on the same page anymore. \n\nIts been about 2-3 weeks since we split and at first I was okay but now I don't know anymore. The past 2 years of our relationship have been long distance since we both have gone away to college and I'm sure that has some affect on everything. \n\nPart of me desperately wants to get back with her but the other part of me knows how she acts and idk...there's more fish in the sea...but i love this fish.", "summary": "Me and my gf of 3 years split. She always had an attitude. Maybe I made a mistake. I dont know what to do ."}
{"id": "t3_1yt2c4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my girlfriend[19F] of almost two years, not sure about how I feel right now", "post": "I've been dating X for almost two years now, but I'm undecided as to whether I want to continue the relationship or not. \n\nShe's perfect on paper, intelligent, pretty, gets along with my family etc, but I'm not sure if my heart is in it any more.\n\nShe seems fairly intent on marrying me, but I don't think I'm ready to even fathom the idea, I think it's way too early and I don't even know if she's the one. I like her and I know she's quite the catch, but I'm not sure I'm ready to stay in a relationship until marriage. She brings it up quite often and seems to be really forcing the idea. Am I just feeling smothered? How do I remedy this?\n\nI'm at a point in my life where my decisions mean a lot to the outcome of how the rest follows through. I'm deciding where I want to go to school, what I'll take, etc. I'm afraid that I'm not making enough of my own decisions and deciding what I want to be happy. \n\nRecently I've been in a bit of a funk and haven't really been as happy as I'm used to. There's nothing really devastatingly wrong in my life so far as I can tell. But I feel like something in this relationship isn't right and it's contributing to my depressed feelings.\n\nWe get along well, it's never been awkward, never felt forced until now.  I'm not really sure what started it but I don't think I'm in this relationship as much as she is and I'm questioning continuing it at all.\n\nIs there any way for me to get back into a relationship I seem to have fallen out of? If not, how do I go about breaking up with her? I'm really just looking for insight into the situation and maybe another point of view. If you need more information just ask, I wasn't really sure what to put in here.", "summary": "I don't know whether or not I should stay in this relationship. At a point in my life where I'm making a lot of life long decisions. Looking for some insight or a second point of view."}
{"id": "t3_2pnocc", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By Thinking I Could Jump Off A Playground", "post": "Ok like many other stories this was set a long time ago when I was a kid.\n\nIt was like any other day at school, at recess I decided I wanted to eat more now and have less at lunch so I put my lunchbox on the playground jungle gym sort of thing, at lunchtime I realised I never bought it back to class so I asked my teacher and left with another kid we'll call him Brian to go collect my lunchbox. The playground was surrounded by a row of hire huts that our school was using since the music area was being renovated. So I climb up the ladder to the top of the playground (It's really not that high) and collect my lunchbox, now I'm a badass so I decide Ive jumped off this thing before why not do it in front of Brian? So I go \"watch this\" and jump, I immediately feel pain I landed balls first into one of the ladder sticks, \"What the?\" I mumble I start to walk a few steps in front of a bunch of kids who watched this unfold they're asking if I'm ok. For some reason I can't here them I then just fell straight onto the floor, Brian just runs to go notify staff or something but I don't see him again. The crying begins I've realised what just happened and the pain is incredible, I get walked to the nurse and since she's a girl I have to self-examine myself it BLEEDING! WTF? I tell her and my Mum picks me up the shame is awful I get rushed to a emergency appointment at my local GP and that day of every 365 frickin' days a year they have a uni nurse, my GPs a man and the nurse is a woman, ugh... So my Mum says it's fine if they both examine my nuts really? They really couldn't do anything and they didn't want me on painkillers so I just had to wait... Later that year I had testicle torsion. I haven't reproduced and am not sure if I can anymore :(", "summary": "Decided to be a badass and fell balls first into a ladder, balls bled and later on I suffered from testicular torsion."}
{"id": "t3_3vuz22", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27f] with my boyfriend [32m] of 6 months. Third time addressing issue of sexting random women online/texting. Should I give him yet another chance or just move on?", "post": "Everything seems to be going really great with my boyfriend. We've met each other's families, we're spending a lot of time together, we have sex regularly and things seem fine. I'm worried because this is the third time I've caught him sexting other women. \n\nHe reactivates POF and OKC accounts, gets phone #s from ladies on there, deactivates the accounts and then sexts them. Each time he insists it's just to masturbate, that he has no real intention of emotionally investing in any of these women or meeting in person. I guess that's better than if he were actually meeting up with them, but i feel so betrayed and disgusted. He swears he will permanently delete his online accounts and contact info for these women and \"just watch porn like everybody else\" (his words). \n\nAm I being foolish to give him another chance? Does anyone have an experience like this where the person actually does change their behavior?", "summary": "Boyfriend of 6 months habitually sexts other women. From what I can tell, there is no other emotional connection other than sexual. I just addressed this issue for the third time. Can he actually change?"}
{"id": "t3_4h3i7q", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Overweight Cat", "post": "Hello everyone! One of my cats is about 10 years old now, she is pretty much strictly indoors save for some time she spends on our screened in porch each day. (She likes to watch the birds in the yard while she suns herself by the pool, quite the princess). Anyway, when she was younger she was very active and quite small, however with age she has put on a pretty hefty amount of weight. I feed her indoor cat food for weight control, I've switched brands a few times trying to find something that works, I've cut back on feeding her by a lot (she gets very angry and demanding when she wants food but I don't give in) however, nothing really seems to work. I've tried cat toys, and bought a harness thinking I could try to walk her but she just lays down and looks at me like I'm stupid. Basically I just want to know if you all have any suggestions for exercise or food. I care about her and don't want this to get any worse. I also have another cat that eats the same amount and type of food as her and is a completely normal weight and only a year younger, however he is a male, not sure if that makes a difference in predisposition for weight gain. They are also both fixed.", "summary": "my indoor female cat has put on an unhealthy amount of weight with age and my attempts at diet change and exercise don't seem to have any impact. Suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_2jqw0q", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Sister Issues", "post": "So I've posted here before venting about my sister... as she hasn't been the nicest about my wedding planning/engagement. For example: having massive meltdowns about how everyone else's life is great except hers, constantly encouraging us to have a longer engagement for all sorts of reasons (including financial, saying we're too young, waiting until we have stable jobs... etc.)\n\nMy sister got engaged last weekend, and I'm super excited for her, but still honestly a bit annoyed, partially due to some of the ill feelings from events prior. Nonetheless, when she announced her engagement, nobody in our family was excited. Literally nobody. I think there are a lot of things feeding into this, including: she has been such a monster towards me, saying that this was going to be happening any time for the last 2 years, our family was literally the last people to know, her FH didn't ask my dad, and when they originally announced their engagement, they were planning on getting married in March (our wedding is in June).\n\nAfter talking her today, for the first time after the engagement (like I said, bad feelings over other wedding stuff), she told me that our whole family was really shitty about it. My dad called her selfish, my mom freaked out because she was one of the last people to know, one of my grandma's basically yelled at her for being inconsiderate about my wedding. I have very mixed feelings about everything - I'm so excited for her, so I feel bad, because her engagement should be an extremely exciting time in her life. However, I look at it and see that to some extent she got what she deserved, even though I would not wish that upon her. So basically I'm having a lot of emotion about this and am really confused about how to feel.\n\nAbove all else, part of me wants to do something to help make her feel better about this all. Because I am excited for her, and want her to be able to be excited with me too. However, I really don't know what to do to help make this all better for her.", "summary": "crazy sister got engaged and family reacted poorly, so I want to do something that will make her excited and feel like our family is excited for her despite all of the crap that she has done to me."}
{"id": "t3_33yn37", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Two teens liking each other, but still nothing happens", "post": "Boy this is one hell of a roller coaster of shit...\nOn a new year's camp 2014-2015 I met a girl, who liked me (a lot), but I didn't quite like her back, I tried to get to know her since it's quite uncommon for girls to like me, the camp went on, we didn't quite click and I just acted like it was nothing special... But we got in contact immediately after the camp via WhatsApp (she lives over +50 km away or a 2,5-hour-trip via Public transport), and found out she likes me way, WAAAY more than I had thought, after a month of chatting and stuff I fell for her too. I met her twice after that, but I just didn't know what to do since she didn't show almost any signs of interest and/or I was too much of a pussy to do anything. I quickly after the second meetup just simply confessed to her, she still liked me according to her, but once I met her again nothing had changed, no signs of interest, no nothing (though this time her friend was with us). After which I was sick and tired of messing around and wanted to get things established and I simply asked if she would like to even be in a relationship, she said yes, after this and today when I saw her, still nothing has changed which has become quite frustrating for me, I just couldn't find the confidence to initiate anything, which is why I feel huuuuge regret of not doing anything. Should I even bother? I have no idea what I'm doing or what I'm supposed to do. She shows only little signs of interest. I can only see her a very limited time for very specific dates. I still feel strongly for her and I'm sure that she does for me too, but with both of us being so awkward and inexperienced, who can't just get the gears working, should I still pursue her? I don't need immediate or exact answers, in fact, only reason why I'm posting this is to get some more POVs about the subject.", "summary": "I like a girl who lives far away, she likes me, we are both fully aware of eachothers' feelings, been like this for two months, some establishment, no real progress"}
{"id": "t3_2xyqws", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] being falsely accused of cheating on my [19 F] girlfriend of 3 months, she seems to believe it and I don't know how to convey the fact it's completely incorrect", "post": "Been with my girlfriend for 3 months now, and we're having some problems. To start off, I'm a guy who pretty much exclusively only has female friends, and my girlfriend knows this, and previously seemed okay with it. \n\nRecently one of her friends saw me on a night out with a group of girls, and told my girlfriend that I 'was all over' one of them. This wasn't true, the girl who told her already dislikes me and constantly gives me dirty looks etc. The girls I was out with were my 3 best friends, and I have absolutely no romantic attraction to any of them, plus they're all in relationships and I've been friends with them for most of my life so you can see why this irritated me.\n\nImmediately my girlfriends attitude towards me seemed to change, she is already quite an insecure person so I immediately tried to reassure her, I told her I only wanted to be with her and noone else and after a few weeks everything seemed okay between us, and I thought I'd sorted it out.\n\nA few nights ago, however, she told me there's been more rumours of my infidelity. We had a long phone call argument where I essentially told her (or tried to) that I never cheated, never will and I wanted to stay with her. She asked me whether I wanted to end it and I obviously said no. Some further background is that my last two girlfriends have cheated on me, so you can see how annoying it is to me to feel like I'm in the wrong without doing anything.\n\nI just don't know how to get through to her that she needs to trust me and believe that I'm not a cheat, never have been and never will be. Any advice would be great.", "summary": "girlfriend thinks I've cheated on her due to rumours, I haven't and it's caused friction in our relationship that I don't know how to get past because I don't know how to tell her that it never happened"}
{"id": "t3_51ai12", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [21/F] need help crafting a message ending a friendship with [22/M] because my fianc\u00e9 [20/M] isn't comfortable with it.", "post": "I have a very co-dependent relationship by nature with an old friend from high school. We never dated, but he was generally always in my life for about four years (15-19 years old). I would classify him as a best friend at that time, but it was volatile, and we ended up both getting hurt and cutting ties. \n   Two years later, we reconnect on Facebook, and my fianc\u00e9 expresses that he isn't comfortable with me talking to him because I'm in a very unstable place of my life, and he (the friend) has a tendency to be cruel and manipulative. \n   I agree with my fianc\u00e9, but after having talked to my friend for a few weeks now, we already have a daily banter established- and he does seem to have changed his ways since being in college.\n   I'm struggling crafting a message, and feel guilt for simply \"not replying\" for about three days now. I just don't know what to say without seeming... Invalidating, or offensive, or dismissive.", "summary": "What should I say to a reconnected friend explaining why I'm terminating our seemingly meaningful friendship over my fianc\u00e9's concerns about past issues that don't appear to be issues anymore?"}
{"id": "t3_3nsfsb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[25M] Just started my first serious relationship with my new GF [25F]. What kind of feelings should I be having?", "post": "Just got into my first serious relationship with my new girlfriend (I'm kind of shy). Been seeing her about once a week for roughly 5-6 weeks now and we've been messaging each other multiple times everyday since the first date and only recently started being exclusive. We can be ourselves around each other and can talk about anything. However I don't think I'm experiencing that rush of love, that head over heels feeling that some people seem to have. Is this normal? Do some people just don't go through this phase? Is it because we only see each other about once a week (she lives almost an hour away)?  We've been very intimate but haven't had sex yet.\n  \nAlthough we can be ourselves with each other and talk about anything, we don't have that much shared hobbies (as far as I know at least). However that shouldn't be that weird since some people have good relationships this way (including some of my friends). Could this be why? If so what are some ways to get around this?  \n  \nFinally, how do I keep her interested and the relationship fresh? Spontaneous dates? Just be myself?", "summary": "First serious relationship, but not feeling head over heels about girl. Is this normal? Moving forward, how do I keep her interested and the relationship interesting? Do I just be myself?"}
{"id": "t3_3c416v", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not making sure my rats couldn't escape.", "post": "A little background, I have 4 rats; 2 albino, 2 black and white ones. In the last week or so, one of the albino ones (mind you, they are practically blind) has been learning to jump from her cage, which is three feet up, and then explore our room. We've tried a bunch of solutions that didn't work, but yesterday we switched out the table and thought now she wouldn't be able to jump down, and she didn't for about three hours.\n\nThis morning we wake up to find the glass of water on my desk (which is about 15 feet away from her cage, and about 3 feet off the ground) is tipped over and the water spilled onto my gaming pc. We found her under the bed and put her back.\n\nNow, I open my PC and dry off the parts with a q-tip, the wires, everything is dry it seems. I turn it on, motherboard, GPU, CPU,", "summary": "Didn't do a good job of not letting rat escape, she spilled my glass of water and fried my gaming pc hard drive."}
{"id": "t3_41adsr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Any strategies for dealing with roommates who don't do their dishes? I'm 26F, they're 27M, 29F, and 23M", "post": "I live in a house with three other people, we're not students, we all have jobs, and are seemingly normal, functioning adults in society. But the dishes *never* get done. I've written notes, I've sat down and talked to people, I've tried taking away my own dishes... it just is so discouraging. I love cooking, and I love how big and bright and beautiful my kitchen is, but it's always so gross, and the sink is always filled with dirty dishes for days on end, and there's food caked on the stove, and it's like the people I live with are completely incapable of cleaning up after themselves. It's to the point where some of my pots and pans are scratched and damaged for sitting with food caked in them for days, and my baking pans are damaged beyond repair because of my lazy roommates. I don't want to move - I really like the space I'm living in, I've moved a lot in the past three years and dishing out first and last month's rent takes a huge toll on my meager savings. I just want to know if anyone out there has lived with roommates who don't seem to know how to do their dishes, and how they handled that, and if there were any successful strategies. I feel like I'm at the end of my rope.", "summary": "Roommates don't do dishes. I'm looking for strategies because talking to them, leaving notes, and taking away my own dishes doesn't seem to be working."}
{"id": "t3_29v8hp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my now Ex girlfriend [18F] left me for another guy again after 2 years. Need help with recovering.", "post": "On mobile and in a rush please forgive me\n\nI need help. After a relationship of 2 years with a girl who I thought was honestly the one for me I get dumped for another guy for a second time. I know that if I take her back again it'll be another mistakes, I don't plan to either.\n\nI feel worthless. Even after everything we did. All the time we spent together, she didn't find me good wnough. I tried so hard to make her happy. I did everything possible to make her feel like a queen. This is a fact, everyone I've talked to about this has said that I didn't do anything wrong and that it wasn't my fault. Even though I know that this is true My self esteem is destroyed. I'm usually a very chipper and funny person to be around according to my friends and right know I feel like they don't want me around because I can't be happy now. I want to know how to cheer myself up.\n\n I've tried distracting myself with almost everything I can but for some reasoning keep thinking about her and her new guy fucking. It's a guy wrenching feeling and for some reason my thoughts keep going back to that. He is more attractive.That he will make her happier. That he will please her better. That I am inferior in every way possible.  How can I stop thinking and picturing anything to do with her?\n\nAnother problem I'm having is that after being with her for so long and being in such a small town I feel like no one will take me. It is known that her and I we're together by everyone and I feel that I am now undesirable. That on top of the fact that I never really learned how to e single. Is there anywhere I can learn how to flirt. Learn how to at least not be completely inept with the opposite sex? Like an r4r but not physical. I know it's an odd question but it's something that I just thought", "summary": "Got dumped by someone I cared about for another guy and not I feel worthless and am worried about just being single in general. All help is appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_34s8a2", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not washing my hands after hot wings.", "post": "TIFU because my mom thought it was a great idea to try the new Atomic Hot Wings from a pizza place around here. Apparently the Hot Wings are so hot that you are required to sign a waiver before purchasing them. Knowing me, the hot sauce fiend - no problem! \n\nWhen she got home I immediately scarfed 3. They were EXTREMELY HOT WITH LITTLE TO NO TASTE, TOTALLY NOT WORTH IT AT ALL. Either way, I felt manly as heck. I had hair on my chest and everything. \n\nLater, I lied down in my bed and I started feeling myself up for no reason (you know you do it!). All of a sudden I start feeling this wicked burning sensation which at first felt kind good...not so soon after. All of a sudden there is a massive burning which I can only explain to you as a volcano erupting from my urethra. I rush to the sink and I start pouring cold water on it to no avail, my lil guy was literally burning it down. \n\nAfter an hour or so it went away after much sitting in the shower and weeping for my sin - when I came out everyone knew what was going on. My sister thought it was a good idea to tell everybody in the house, and they're all calling me Volcano Dick now.", "summary": "Ate waiver-worthy hot wings and touched my dick after, erupting it into flames, got a new nick name from it."}
{"id": "t3_17bs0y", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "I want to take my parents on a trip as a \"thank you\" gift. Where should I take them?", "post": "A few years ago I quit my job to go back to graduate school. I knew going back to school would allow me to further my career but I also knew that during my time as a student I would have to live on a significantly lower income. There were some months where I just couldn't make rent, the car needed repairs, etc. My parents came to my rescue each time even though I knew they didn't have much money themselves (my mother is a nurse and my father is a civil servant). I am extremely thankful for them and I want to return the favor.\n\nNow that I have finished school and gotten a great job in my chosen career I want to take them on well deserved vacation. Here are the rules:\n\n1. They have never left the east coast United States so I would like to take them on a trip abroad. Domestic travel is ok too so I wouldn't mind hearing some suggestions.\n\n2. My parents are still young and in good health so suggestions on physical/adventurous activities are greatly appreciated. However, I don't think they would like camping trips or roughing it in the wilderness for an extended period of time.\n\n3. I want this to be a \"trip of a lifetime\" so I certainly don't mind spending money as long as they have a great time. We're not a very wealthy family though so let's keep the suggestions reasonable. \n\n4. Mostly I want a destination with a lot of culture, relaxation, interesting cuisine, and picture taking opportunities but I know that goes without saying.\n\nAnyway, I hope you guys can help!", "summary": "My parents have gotten me out of many financial jams in the past. Now, I want to return the favor by taking them on a kick ass vacation."}
{"id": "t3_3ahc54", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my boyfriend [31M] 7 months together, been thinking I need to leave the relationship.", "post": "I want to start by saying my boyfriend is wonderful in most ways. I'm just starting to feel like I'm not a priority to him and at this point in our relationship, I think I should be.\n\nFor the first 3 months of our relationship we didn't go two days without seeing each other. Now we see each other about once a week. This isn't okay with me. I've made my concerns known for the past two months. His typical response is \"Really, lizabethbathory? This again?\" But nothing changes. I bring it up a lot because if I don't see resolution, it's still clearly a problem. I've explained to him that I feel like we should be spending more time together, and getting closer at this point in the relationship. His excuses are he works a lot (this is true), and he has sports, and also needs to see friends. I've met his friends, he's never met mine. We haven't met each others families. I've also expressed concern about this, as family is very important to me.\n\nI've definitely fallen in love with him but I don't want to continue in this relationship when he's not ready to commit his time to me. The thought of life without him is terrifying to me. When we are together, I feel amazing. My soul feels happy. But we're apart more often than not, and that hurts my feelings pretty badly. I'm having a hard time leaving because I'm scared of my future without him in it.", "summary": "Brought up two months ago that we need to see each other more, still only seeing each other once a week. Not making me and our relationship a priority."}
{"id": "t3_2h9nzw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex [19 F] broke up with me [20 M] it's been a year and we've tried to be friends.", "post": "I dated my gf for a year and a half before we broke up due to my unconfirmed mental disorder. hell broke loose fights and tears were shed as we both realised it was the best/worse thing to do.\n \nGot diagnosed. I have MPD with high traits of narcissism. She believes the whole year and half was a lie and that I never loved her. que more fights and tears back and forth. \n\nOver the year we've been apart we've tried to be friends as we both have a lot of laughs and things in common, but for that year she wanted me back and I knew in my head that it's safer for her to find someone new, even though I did want her back.\n\nNow to today, she's found someone new but the connection we felt together has gone like the light has finally gone out. It's painful because she's now someone completely different and I don't know what to do or feel.\n\nDo I stay friends, break everything off or something else?", "summary": "GF broke up with me, been a year trying to be friends, she finally moved on, connection gone, what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_3l5qxx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not having any balls", "post": "This is the harrowing tale of me and how I proved to myself that I don't have any balls.\n\nSo earlier on today I was at university. In one of my classes is a girl I like, but unfortunately due to the class, there is very little chance to talk to her. \nSo the class in question is philosophy, which is very boring to sit through. At the end of the class the tutor says that he would like some of us to volunteer to present the next classes info to make it more interesting for us. \nI think to myself 'great this will be a good opportunity to show this girl how brave and confident I am' (ha). As I'm about to say that I'll do it, she jumps in and says she will do it!! \nNow, I know what you're thinking (because I was thinking it too) 'awesome, if I volunteer too then I will get the chance to work with her and get to know her a bit'. Well as the seconds tick by after her volunteering my brain shuts down. Literally I couldn't move or say anything. I tried, and failed, to volunteer myself up as tribute but didn't have the balls to say in front of everyone that I wanted to work with her. \n\nEnded up spending the rest of the day hiding in my car beating myself up for not having the balls to volunteer.", "summary": "had the opportunity to partner up with a girl I like in class but freaked the fuck out and sat there like an idiot. Cried myself to sleep in the car after class."}
{"id": "t3_2cu7o8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my really good friend [19/F]", "post": "I've been really good friends with this girl for over 5 years, and we slept together about a year ago and left it as that since we're at different universities, I had a girlfriend when I slept with her and now I don't have a girlfriend but she has a boyfriend who it seems she is not that bothered about, but I do really want to go out with her, but the different universities is holding me back and I don't know what to do. I have a year at university left and she had two, what should I do?!", "summary": "I don't know what to do with my childhood sweetheart who I really like, please tell me what you think I should do!"}
{"id": "t3_3vid33", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I too much of a pushover?", "post": "So, I've had a shitty week/month/year regarding women and I'm starting to think it's just me...\nso, I'm 25 year old male and I've had this ex who had strung me along for over a year. She dumped me because she didn't love me anymore then dated someone else and came back to me for a year before I put a stop to it. I didn't talk to her for over 8 months and during that time I went on several dates, all ended with the first date and no second one. Then, I meet this girl, she goes on several dates with me and just cuts off contact and never responded to my text (no, I didn't blow up her phone, I just stopped texting her after she never responded.)\nAfter not hearing from her for a month or so she text me out of the blue on wednesday, asking if I want to see a movie. I said yes and today, when we were going to see it, she told me \"I'm so bad, I saw it with my brother, I'm sorry\" I said no problem, we can do something else. Its turned into nothing but excuses so I just said fuck it, not going to push for it.\nNow, today, my ex hit me up to hang out and talk. I said ok, we talk, go out to lunch and she said \"you promise you won't get mad?\" I told her to just say it. She said \"I'm dating another guy, but if it doesn't work out do you want to get back together?\" I just walked out without saying a word.\nI have aspergers, but I'm very high functioning, just bad social skills. I feel like once the initial physical attraction wears off, I'm bland and boring. I don't know what I'm doing wrong or if it's not me. Are girls normally like this or have I just been unlucky?!?!\nI'm \"very good looking\" from what I'm told so I think that's what scores me the dates, but my personality is shit. and yes, they know I have aspergers before I go on dates with them.", "summary": "I don't understand if it's me or if I'm just unlucky with women. I'm constantly told I'm super awkward. "}
{"id": "t3_qjb8t", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Next-door neighbor making unsubstantiated complaints against my wife and I. Need advice.", "post": "In January my wife and I moved into a town home so we could be closer to school/work.  Since we have moved in we have received three \"friendly\" reminders from the leasing office regarding: number of parking spaces used, our animal not being on a leash, and a noise complaint.  \n\nWe are alloted two spaces for our vehicles plus one for a guest.  Since we have moved in we have only had guests twice and both times they all came in the same vehicle. Add that to the fact that my wife and I work completely different shifts and the only time both our cars occupy our spots are from around 11pm-7am, otherwise one car is there at a time.  \n\nSecond, we received another reminder stating our dog was spotted off the leash and had defecated on another tenants patio.  This never happened.  Our dog uses training pads and the only time she is outside is on our closed in patio with us watching her.  \n\nThe noise complaint we got was on Super Bowl Sunday when we were out of town.  \n\nI have had one interaction with our next door neighbor since we moved in and it was just a hello and goodbye.  I have no idea why she would want to do this. When we see her we always wave.  I've talked to the leasing office twice about it but they don't seem to believe me.  I don't know what talking to her would accomplish or if it would just make things worse. What I do know about her is that she never leaves her home and never turns any lights on. She also makes a habit of looking out her front or patio door every time I enter or leave my home.", "summary": "My next door neighbor is filing complaints against my wife and I that have no truth to them and we do not know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_3bu3aw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [36 M] want to know why it's worth it.", "post": "I am 36 years old. My longest relationship was in HS, lasted a little over a year. I have been through the death of both my parents and helped someone raise a child for a year before finding out it wasn't mine. I have done this with no one \"by my side.\" I've grown, I've improved my life, I've found happiness and joy, strength in adversity, hope, etc... I didn't need someone to \"never abandon me\" or \"to stick with me\" while I did this. For the past year I have actively avoided dating with nothing but good results. My life is bigger, I've accomplished the majority of my goals, I've become a better man. \n\nMy life seems to fall apart, however, when I try to date or romantically connect with someone.  Some people feel this makes me pathetically dysfunctional. Maybe they're right.\n\nLast week the internet exploded with \"LoveWins\" and all I can think is \"Wins what? Every married person I know is miserable.\" They've been cheated on, lied to, died on and disappointed. I hear constant complaints that they want out, they're only there for the kids, their SO has held them back, they wish they'd chosen differently. They can't agree on friends, activities, living arrangements, or sexual patterns. There is a constant stream of lamentation about how inconvenient and difficult relationships are.\n\nI never hear people talk about what makes relationships worthwhile.\n\nIf getting into and suriving a relationship is such a humiliating, terrifying, frustrating, and heartbreaking ordeal, what's the payoff?\n\nIf you are in a relationship, or know that you want one, could you share with me why? What appeals to you about them? What have you gained from them? What makes you stay/keep looking?", "summary": "I've given up on the idea that relationships are worthwhile. Help me see what I'm missing. What makes your relationship worth it?"}
{"id": "t3_49k885", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Passport \"undeliverable\"", "post": "Hello Reddit!  \nI need some advice/support/encouragement regarding my girlfriends passport situation. She submitted a renewal application a couple months ago leading up to our trip in April, she got her old passport back and the enclosed documentation said she should receive the new one shortly. We kind of forgot about it and just checked last Friday (3/4) on the status, and USPS has the package marked as \"**undeliverable as addressed**\" on 2/23. There was no further tracking after that, so the USPS has no idea where it is and assume it was sent back to sender.  \nWe called the passport office and have been told a few things:  \n  \n1) Report the passport lost/stolen and request a new one  \n2) Report the passport as undelivered and let the USPS and passport agency attempt to track it down.  \n  \nI have also heard of success in going to a local passport agency and getting an expedited one, but you cannot get an appointment until 2 weeks out of traveling abroad. We still have like 4 weeks until we travel, so i don't know if the agency will see us, and i don't want to wait until the last minute.  As of today (3/8) we have sent in a form to declare the passport undelivered, and they are supposed to be looking into it, but not sure what the outcome will be.", "summary": "Girlfriends passport wasn't delievered by USPS due to wrong address, traveling in 23 business days, how can we get her a passport in time?"}
{"id": "t3_11j7op", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What would you DO with the money you won if you hit the lottery?", "post": "I would begin by getting a proper wingsuit and parachute.  I would then drive a four wheeler to the highest peak I could find and drive straight off of the cliff (making sure it will not hit anything below beforehand), then spreading my arms and taking flight.   \n\nAfter my first flight I would then purchase a turbo charged Hayabusa street bike and take it to the desert and feel what it is like to drive 180 mph.  \n\nNext I would purchase a massive yacht and begin to tour the world, stopping at places along the way and going backpacking to meet new people and see places and cultures, staying in hostiles and visiting pubs along the way.\n\nOnce I have accomplished several of these goals I would finally have the funds to dedicate all of my time and energy to my music.  Music is a part of me, I sing and play many instruments.\n\nAfter making music and recording albums for several years I would likely become a humanitarian worker and spend the rest of my life teaching people how to build ovens and provide their children with proper food / how to get clean water / helping out the needy of the world.", "summary": "Get all of the fun stuff out of the way first through adrenaline, then travel and learn about people and cultures, then help the needy/hungry of the world for the rest of my days."}
{"id": "t3_qo2rt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Rejected by a girl because of her BFF's lying. Regardless, am I in the wrong?", "post": "To begin at the beginning:\n\nBoy meets girl at college social event. Boy likes girl. Boy is unaware of girl's response to boy's potential advances. Boy is especially reluctant because of Forever Alone issues. So boy texts mutual friend of boy and girl to check if she might be keen, so he can act on rock-solid information.\n\nResponse: 'Sorry, Derp, she's my best friend. I'm not passing on anything that we share. **It's none of my business.**'\n\nLater I get a text from potential soulmate: 'Herpess told me about how you felt. Yeah, look, not looking for a relationship right now. Goodbye, good luck, etc.'\n\n**'None of my business'**, my pointlessly shaven balls.\n\nSo, I was lied to. Did I deserve it by not being upfront from the get-go by trying to act through a surrogate?", "summary": "Looked for a go-between to not be forever alone, go-between lies to me about not sharing information, lots of bandwidth lost to Redtube."}
{"id": "t3_2qlbz8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18F) often feel the need to go up to people (often strangers) and give them specific life advice. They always know what I'm talking about. Am I going crazy?", "post": "So I guess this is a relationship between me and society. \n\nOften I'll be in a class, or on the street, and feel the need to speak to someone, to tell them something about themselves. Ill see somebody and just know I have to go up to them and say \"Hey, that person you've been fighting with? Tell them you are sorry.\" Or \"He loves you, dont be afraid to love him too.\" They know what I am talking about, and thank me. I'm afraid though. Is it just coincidental, and I'm going crazy? I often ignore these urges, because I don't want to seem crazy in front of my friends. I also don't want to become some spectacle that people come to, asking about all their petty issues. What should I do?", "summary": "I often feel the need to go up to people (often strangers) and give them specific life advice. They always know what I'm talking about. Am I going crazy?"}
{"id": "t3_35di45", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21M] long-distance crush [22F] keeps telling me about the other guys who hit on her. How am I supposed to respond?", "post": "Okay so I know the usual answer is \"she's trying to make you jealous... make a move\" but there's some backstory that changes things.\n\nSo I've known her since October. We met online (gaming) and she had a boyfriend at the time. Her and I fell for each other and became really close.\n\nShe's single now, and \"isn't really ready to let another guy close\". So she's not ready for a relationship. I've asked her about \"us\" and she told me she wants to remain friends \"for now\" but definitely still has a thing for me.\n\nThat was a month ago. She told me last night that her ex finally stopped messaging her and pining after her and that she was happy. \n\nThe weird thing now is that she keeps telling me about other guys who hit on her. At first I thought she was trying to make me jealous, but I can't understand why she'd need to do that when she knows how much I like her + I try to _show_ her how much I like her quite often?\n\nI don't know if I'm friendzoned as _fuck_ and she's telling me about _other guys_ or if she's trying to hint that she wants me to compete (even though she's always kinda put me on a pedastal for being _better than anyone before_). She said that these guys, and one guy in particular have expressed their feelings for her but she's told them that she never ever wants anything more than friendship from them. She also said that these guys are \"persistent\". She seems to see persistence as a good thing (she's mentioned that she liked persistence in past boyfriends).\n\nAm I supposed to react in some way? All I said was \"I told you so\" because I often tease her about her online admirers. We were laughing about the whole thing at the time but now I can't help but feel like she was trying to _do_ something when she told me this stuff.", "summary": "Crush (who apparently likes me too) keeps telling me about guys who're crushing on her who she isn't interested in. Is she trying to manipulate some sort of reaction from me?"}
{"id": "t3_27pea5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my (hopefully soon to be SO) [? F] less than a day, how do I ask her out?", "post": "Last night I was studying with my friend at one of the residence halls at my campus. 4:00 am rolls around and we start getting hungry and need a break so we decide its as good of a time as ever to go to the 24 hour corner store. On our way down we pass by a study room with a glass wall and I see a very cute girl studying and her friend laying on a couch.\n\nWe go to the store, buy our stuff, and on our way back we pass by the same room only this time we ended up making eye-contact. I decided, since I'm single, to write a note to her saying that I thought she was cute and good luck on her finals with my phone number at the bottom. I walked back to her study room, taped it to the glass wall, knocked on the glass twice to get her attention, and a few seconds after her seeing me, I walked off with my friend waiting around the corner. \n\nI ended up getting a text this morning around 8:30 from an unknown number saying \"Thanks. good luck on finals too\". I honestly didn't think it would work and I would never hear from her. I don't know her name, or anything about her but she is really pretty and I know I want to ask her out. \n\nMy question is how should I respond seeing as we don't know each others names or anything about each other, other than we probably go to the same school.", "summary": "Wrote a cute note to a girl I've never talked to and don't know her name, she texted me but I'm not sure how to respond."}
{"id": "t3_2ru5iw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [25 F] deal with my romantic friend [24 M] when I need alone time?", "post": "I have been dating this guy for maybe a month. We aren't in a serious relationship, just dating here and there. I'm not in the mood to be in a serious relationship now.\n\nIn the last week he has been texting me a whole bunch, enough to make it somewhat annoying (10 texts every hour or something. I reply here and there). I just don't want to talk to him all the damn time. I want to hang out with my other friends and such.\n\nJust today, I was playing this online game with another friend. First time I got to play in a couple days, and when he sees me online, he watches me play the game itself (the game has a \"spectator\" mode, which means people can watch you play), and keeps asking me to play against him. About a couple hours later, he gives up and says \"fine, guess not\" which makes me feel bad. I really just want to play by myself right now (or with my other friend, whom I haven't talked to in a while). Honestly, him watching me play in spectator mode kind of felt like someone watching what you're doing over your shoulder. It felt kind of uncomfortable.\n\nHow can I deal with someone like this? I want to keep dating the romantic friend, but this is sort of starting to get annoying. I'm not sure how to explain without being rude.\n\nAnother thing to note: He was virgin when we met and we had sex a couple times. He was really nervous about it, so it wasn't good sex. Not a big deal to me at all. I want to make sure I can be as nice about the talkative issue as much as possible, and make sure he knows it isn't about the sex or whatever.", "summary": "Dating someone. He wants a lot of attention, it kind of bothers me. Not sure how to get him to stop."}
{"id": "t3_ywjup", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/M] girl in the group...awkward scenarios", "post": "Hello reddit,\n\nSo earlier in the year an old school friend of ours came into the group with a long distance BF and nobody was really bothered but soon the \"hatin'\" came up. After a while she broke up with the guy and I watched as some in my circle tried for her. Initially I wasn't interested but she is genuinely good so I tried for it. Everything went well till she flaked on me so I moved on, found out later it happened to another who tried the kiss-ass method...\n\nFast forward and everyone still hangs out but theres a veil of passive aggressive and I see folks still going for her. To make things worse one friend keeps obsessing over her in my presence and it hits at my underlying loneliness since I never had a true relationship. I feel like I need another group of friends to chill with but I don't know how to go about dealing with the consequences of such a move.", "summary": "liked a kinda flakey girl, got over her. Feelings keep resurfacing due to obnoxious friends and don't know how to deal with them without being left with a \"slow, long term burn\"."}
{"id": "t3_445a5y", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I [24 M] take my relationship to the next level with this girl [19 F] I know?", "post": "I know this girl for a week now. First time we met I noticed we had an instant click. We had fun. We laughed. But I didn't know I liked her so much. I'm not a person to fall in love that easy but after couple of days I found out I really like her. I would like a longer relationship with her.\n\nBut there are problems. She is not from here. She is from Italy and in couple of weeks she is going back to Italy. By the way, yesterday I met her again. We had a great time. We talked a lot, we hugged, laughed, and we even had sex. I already sub communicated I like her more than a \"fling\" but I don't know if she wants long term relationship especially since she is moving back to Italy soon.\n\nIn couple of weeks she is going back to her own country. How can I tell her that I want to have a long term relationship without freaking her out and coming off needy/creepy? In the last couple of days I can only think about her although I don't even want to think about her.", "summary": "I like this new girl I met. How can I move the relationship to the next level without coming off as needy?"}
{"id": "t3_32rlg2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] boyfriend [24M] keeps physically hurting me ... am I overreacting?", "post": "My boyfriend keeps getting physical with me when he's upset. The first time he really injured me was just a few days ago and it took me until tonight to talk to him about it.\n\nHe pinched and twisted my fingers until I started crying and asking him \"why would you do this to me?\". Yes, I was purposely annoying him while he was driving (touching his face) but I thought I was being playful and goofy. \n\nWhen I brought it up with him tonight he made it clear he meant to hurt me and offered justification rather than an apology. Finally after I explained \"You are my boyfriend. You should never want to hurt me. You should feel awful if you hurt me. You should be upset at the thought of me being hurt\" he apologized and I thought it had sunk in.\n\nJust a little while ago I was teasing him and he dug his fingers into the back of my head, pushing me down. He did this in front of a mutual friend which makes me think he doesn't realize the gravity of what he's doing.\n\nWe do horse around a lot but if someone expresses they are hurt it stops immediately. This feels different. This feels like he's purposely hurting me, even if it's not overly violent.\n\nAm I over reacting? I've never had a boyfriend behave like this with me before. I don't know how to approach this subject considering we **just** talked about it.\n\nWe've been together for 2 years and he's never behaved like this in the past but I have no intentions of putting up with this in the future/letting it evolve.", "summary": "Boyfriend is hurting me. I've talked to him. He's still hurting me. Am I over reacting? What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2gxc8h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with my ex-boyfriend [25M], he is texting me to tell me about the people he is planning to sleep with this weekend", "post": "I just need to get this off my chest.\n\nI dated my ex for about 6 months before my kidneys failed and I had to start dialysis (11 months ago). I told him that my first priority was myself for the time being, and didn't think I could really commit to a serious relationship. We hooked up a few times after, but while I was on dialysis, I felt really self-conscious (I had a tube coming out of my stomach) and was generally pretty tired and not that interested in sex.\n\nWe stayed pretty close, and I had a kidney transplant 2 weeks ago so I should hopefully be returning to some form of normalcy soon. Before I had my transplant, he told me he didn't want to put any pressure on me, but he would like to continue the relationship when I was better if that's what I want to as well. In any event, he said he at least wanted to stay close friends. I still really love him and do want to pick things back up, and I told him that. \n\nBut tonight, he started texting me that he was going to sleep with another guy (including sending a picture of the guy), and then told me he is planning to have a threesome tomorrow night with two really attractive guys. \n\nAm I being too sensitive? I don't really care if he sleeps with other people right now, but I don't want to hear about it. I just don't understand why he would tell me this, or if he was just leading me on a few weeks ago when he said he would like to continue the relationship. I understand it's kind of a weird situation so I don't want to be too judgmental of him. Should I just tell him I don't want to hear about this? It just seems kind of insensitive.", "summary": "ex-boyfriend and I talked about picking up relationship when I recover from a kidney transplant, but tonight he started texting me about other guys he is going to sleep with this weekend. Am I justified being upset?"}
{"id": "t3_1krnth", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me(18M) and My girlfriend (18f) want to get back together after we broke up, but there is a problem.", "post": "So my girlfriend and I broke up about 2 weeks ago, but we haven't stopped talking since then. She told me she wanted to be a \"thing\" which wasn't too serious at all, but meant we would try and only want each other. She goes on vacation to the beach where many of our friends, including my best friend is there. I tell her I can't be just a thing with her because I want more. So the next day she gets drunk and tries to hookup with my bestfriend, he declines thankfully. She calls me about 45 minutes after it happens asking to get back together and then telling me what happened. I blew up on her, and was completely outraged. Then later in the night after a long fight of freaking out on her, I couldn't fight the feeling I still wanted her. Should I forgive her and try to work things out? Let me add she and all her friends said she missed me so much and wanted me back. My best friend was talking to her about our relationship for me, and that's when she asked him from being drunk and her excuse of \"missing me\" is why she did this. Should I tell her to fuck herself, or keep our love strong?", "summary": "Gf and I breakup, few weeks later drunkenly tries to hookup with my best friend then instantly calls me wanting me back after."}
{"id": "t3_1uvdd6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 F] I drive myself crazy when in a relationship", "post": "I think I have unresolved issues, but I don't know what they are.\nThe problems I have, only surface when I'm in a relationship. At the beginning I'm sort of in love, but after a while I'll doubt.\nWhen I'm longer in a relationship I'll just doubt it the whole time, but when the relationship ends I'm really really hurt, like dying from emotional pain hurt. While when before I'm like: no, if he breaks up with me nothing would change much.\nI do not seem to realize how much I care for someone until that someone breaks things off. I'm confused by my emotions.\nOh, in the relationship I also tend to get very critical (like, nothing is good enough?I'll think he's is too clingy and then he changes that and I'll be like ' You ignores' me too much'. Or I just don't like how he looks, talks, laughs, I seem to search for things). \nI'm a person who constantly tells how she feels. So everything I doubt the relationship, I'll bring it up and the my SO just feels really shitty and doesn't know what to do, but I don't know what to do either. And I can be really bitchy (I'll lose my temper quickly). It also may come because I can't handle stress and pressure?  When I'm happy I'm less critical, but when I'm feeling depressed I'm doubting everything, especially my SO. I don't think anyone CAN help me, but I just wondered if there were more people feeling like this? And if there are more people, how do you deal with this?\nI also thought I might just be getting cold feet because 'I choose an SO' and will be 'stuck' with that person forever when there could be someone else for me who's better. Maybe I just watched too many Disney movies.", "summary": "I think I have unresolved issues, but I don't know what they are, relationships suffering because of it. Are there people with the same problem?"}
{"id": "t3_2buzj8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [24M] am a shallow piece of sh*t and need help with my girlfriend [26f]", "post": "Basically I'm a shallow piece of shit and need help. I don't really find my girlfriend attractive. All my life I've only gone for looks, which ended in breakups with my ex'es. \n\nWe've been together for 7 months. I thought I knew what love was before I knew her, but she has made me feel what REAL love is. \n\nI've actually never been happier. But... I don't really find her sexy. In the beginning when we started dating, (and you're gonna hate me for this), I actually covered her face with a pillow when we fucked or only wanted doggy. (This has changed ofcourse). \n\nShe isn't an ugly girl, she looks good, it's just I've been so stupid and shallow with girls my whole life. \n\nI'm wondering if anyone else has experienced something similar and overcame it? I want so badly to find her sexy, beucase she is so perfect in every other way. I want this to work!", "summary": "I've been shallow my whole life and don't find my girlfriend attractive. I NEED your help to overcome this stupid hangup of mine. I'm so ashamed of myself."}
{"id": "t3_1k3kl4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My(21f) SO(21m) doesn't try to make contact with me unless I make contact first", "post": "So me and my SO have been together for 4months now and everything seemed to be going great. But I started to notice that he doesn't text/call me anymore unless I text/call him first. We we started dating he would text me all the time or call me just to see how my day was. I thought it was sweet. I would of course take the initiative too and text or call him. \n\nNow it all seems very very one sided I'll text him and about four-five messages later he'll stop replying. Recently, I decided to wait and see if he'd text me. Its been three days and all I've gotten was a like on a facebook status. I know he's not busy because he's on summer break frm school, & only works like 2days a week. \n\nNow I'm not the kind of girl who constantly needs attention but a \"hey\" maybe every other day would be nice. I dont really want to make a big deal out of this because when we're together hes very attentive and sweet.\n\n Am I just being crazy, is this normal from guys?", "summary": "my bf doesn't really seem to make an effort to contact me. Am I acting crazy for wanting him to at least try to text me every other day?"}
{"id": "t3_rxm7p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's your Socially Awkward Penguin moment?", "post": "As I was walking to work today, I see a seedy looking character holding a bag running towards me. Roughly 15 meters behind him there was a lady chasing him.\n\nI immediately assumed the bag he was holding was the woman's purse and he was robbing her. Thinking quickly, I attempted a Good Guy Greg and went to stop the guy as he ran past me. However, my best intentions were all for naught, as he completely knocked me over.\n\nInstead of him trying to keep on running, he started yelling at me and repeated that 'he should punch my face in'. Turns out, he was actually running to stop the bus and that the lady behind him was his wife.\n\nI apologized, (still lying on the ground) and got up and went to work. haven't told anyone in person because I'm too embarrassed because I was an idiot, and because I almost got beaten up.\n\nAnyone else have any Socially Awkward Penguin stories?", "summary": "Tried to stop a running man from stealing a lady's purse. He was running for the buss with his wife and I almost got into a fight."}
{"id": "t3_3niro6", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Don't piss off your younger brother...", "post": "I only recently found this subreddit and I am hooked so I'd thought i'd share my story..\n\nFirst off, this happened about 5-6 years ago so parts may be a little hazy.\nA bit of a background story to why I did this... My older brother would always annoy me by doing stupid little \"pranks\" and one day while I was eating dinner he thought it would be hilarious to pull my chair from underneath me (the oldest trick in the book). \n\nSo i decided that enough was enough and needed to plot my revenge. Given that I have more intelligence than he has and could only come up with old tricks, I wanted to put some thought into getting my revenge. One thing I noticed was that when he came back from work after a long day, he would always launch himself onto his bed to relax.\n\nOne day when he went to work, I spent about an hour or so turning everything (figuratively speaking) in his room upside down including all his pictures, alcohol bottles on his table, his TV (don't know how you can't notice this), posters and most importantly his bed.....yeah flipped it over so the base was on top and the mattress on the floor. I then remade his bed to make it look as normal as I possibly could so he wouldn't suspect a thing.\n\nThen I waited with much eagerness to fulfill my revenge and around 2 hours later he arrived home and surely enough went straight to his room. As my room was next to his, I was being as quiet as possible so he didn't know I was home and so I could hear my work coming to life.\n\nThat's when the inevitable happened......all I heard is a scream followed by a WTF!! Turns out the force of him landing and the hard impact onto the \"hardened mattress\", he also smashed his head. It wasn't until I came in laughing my ass off with a shit-eating grin from my proud work that he had also realised that everything else in his room was upside down. He then had to spend the next 1-2 hours putting everything back up the right way much to his annoyance.\n\nLets just say he stopped annoying me after that.", "summary": "Brother pulled chair underneath me, I flipped his bed over and he smashed his head on the base. Me 1, Bro 0"}
{"id": "t3_vtsmv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friends think I'm using my BF for sex...but I think I found the \"one\", what do you think?", "post": "I met my boyfriend in Dec 2011 at our university.  We had sex shortly after we met (not my brightest idea) and I just felt like he was the only guy i've connected with ever (this includes all my previous boyfriends).\n\nHowever, previous to him, I had had sex once.  Now with him I have it every other day basically.  It took us a few months to get me to be able to orgasm (first ever!!) but since then sex has been overly satisfying!  My friends think I only love my boyfriend for the sex.  It is true we have sex a lot for college kids, but I really feel like I want to spend my life with him.\n\nWe understand eachother so well, I feel like I never have to say things with words around him because he usually knows how I am thinking.  I am not as well with reading him, but then again I just suck at being with men in general.  It has taken me a while to get around to some of his ways of life (his music, sports, style) but now I love him more than ever-I love him more everyday.  I have grown to love the music he likes (country in case you're wondering) and still working on the trapshooting and motorcycling.  \n\nI really do want to spend my life with him, I want to marry him even though I prefer my last name to his...but I'm sure in time I will like it ;)\n\nAnyways, from what I have said here, does it sound like I'm using him for sex? One more tidbit of info: we are currently an hour apart while on summer break, so we don't see eachother much but we talk hours a day and text 50 hours a day.  We see eachother every couple weeks and if we want to (which lets be honest we are like sooo horny for eachother) we have sex.\n\nAm I too young (19 he's 18, 19 in just 8 days!) to know who I want to marry already? We have been dating 6 months now.", "summary": "My friends think I'm using my boyfriend for sex-I think I love him, the only man I've ever really loved, and I want to be with him forever."}
{"id": "t3_xy7bb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Stayed at my girlfriends parents house, was feed and taken care of while we were visiting. Would like a Spanish speaker to help me day thank you.", "post": "I looked for a \"help me translate this\" subreddit but could not find one. Since this had to do with my relationship this was the best place I could think of for posing this question.  So my girlfriend is moving to cali next week(ldr) we came to say hello to her parents and introduce me to/saybye to her friends. Instead of staying at a hotel and her staying at home, they kindly offered to stay with them. They fed me, took us out etc. the works. They don't speak much  English, and I don't speak great Spanish (I'm a horrible Mexican). So I was hoping someone would give me a nice way to say thank you got letting me stay and being so hospitable.  Would really appreciate it. Thank you in advance", "summary": "Girlfriends parents gave me a place to stay and fed me when we went to visit them instead of me staying in a hotel. Want a nice way to say thank you in Spanish."}
{"id": "t3_2vxyh8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [16 F] best friend [18 M] got a college girlfriend and doesn't speak to me anymore.", "post": "Throwaway since he knows my username.\n\nSo my friend (let's call him Jake) left for college a few months ago. Jake has been my best friend for the last couple of years, and I took it pretty hard when he had to leave. He promised to visit every so often, and we still texted/ facebook messaged quite often. We cared a lot about each other; we helped each other with our problems and he was just a lot of fun to be around. \n\nHowever, maybe two or three months after he left, Jake got a girlfriend. \n\nShe seemed really awesome and since this was his first girlfriend, Jake was over the moon. He told me everything about her. And I honestly could not have been happier for him. \n\nIt started getting a little frustrating when Jake would visit, as he would be texting his girlfriend the **entire time.**\n\nNot even exaggerating. I would be talking to him, and he would just nod his head and stare at his phone. \n\nI didn't want to bug him about it; I knew that he was happy about having a girlfriend and they seemed really good together. But slowly, the facebook conversations stopped. He didn't visit anymore. And every single time I tried to talk to Jake, he was with his girlfriend. \n\nThe last conversation I had with him, I asked if he didn't like talking to me anymore, or if he was tired of me. He said no, but we haven't talked since. \n\nI did see him one more time after that over Christmas break at a game night a bunch of my friends were at, but he brought his girlfriend with him and he didn't even look at me. \n\nSince the majority of my friends have left for college, I've been incredibly lonely. Losing my best friend has just made everything worse, and I can't think about him without getting super upset. As far as I know, it wasn't anything I did that made him stop talking to me, but I can't help but feel that it's my fault. How do I get my best friend back?", "summary": "My best friend left for college, got a girlfriend, and doesn't talk to me anymore. I don't know why. How do I get my best friend back?"}
{"id": "t3_3hb0c0", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Being interviewed by the same person from last time.", "post": "Hi Reddit.\n\nI've accepted an interview for a sales role at a corporate company that I applied for over a year ago. \nThough, I've just found that I'm being interviewed by the same HR Exec as last time.\nThe last interview didn't go well. It was awkward, short and my worst experience to date. I was given poor answers when I asked questions. We just didn't click. \n\n*Example question: What does the company offer for progression?* \n\n*Answer: You're free to do what you like. We're not chaining you here. -silence-*\n\nMaybe it was a bad day or maybe she just didn't like me. It was strange. I've been interviewed many times (usually by managers or directors), I always do the homework and find common ground with my interviewers; I've rarely been given negative feedback. \n\nEither way, I won't be reporting to her if I got the job - which I'm confident in getting. But is there any advice I could get in overcoming the HR hurdle?\n\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "Being interviewed by same HR person a year on. We didn't get on last time. Need advice on handling her 'style' and avoiding potential awkwardness if she remembers me."}
{"id": "t3_2pj5hp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend (25M) wants to move out of our apartment but stay with me (24F)", "post": "So my BF (25M) and I (24F) have been together for three years and we have been living together for about two years. \n\nEverything has been great, the relationship is fine. It's been convenient that we've lived together because his car had broken down and we have been fortunate enough to get by using only my car. He's able to walk to school and use my car to get to/from work. \n\nNow the opportunity for him to get a car has presented itself and he is considering moving back into his parent house to save money. He wants to stay together, but doesn't want the financial responsibility f living in an apartment. \n\nI'm devastated for multiple reasons. One being that he'd move out and I love having him around to come home to. And two, because although he doesn't pay much rent/utilities he does help out and the money he gives me every month definitely helps me get by. \n\nIn my eyes it seems selfish to move out when I know he'll just be over all \nthe time anyway like he was before he moved in. Except now he won't be \"living\" with me so won't have the financial burden. He says he wants to live with me but has to look out for his best interest. But what about mine? The biggest reason I'm still in this damn state is because I love my bf and want to stay until he done school so we could start our lives elsewhere. \n\nI've sacrificed a lot for him, and now I feel like he's just looking out for what's convenient for him. \n\nBarring the financial stuff it really hurts my feelings he'd want to move out in the first place. I feel like him moving out is like backtracking in a relationship. And I wonder if it will suffer because of it. \n\nI need help reddit. I am in a world of confused emotions and I dot know what to feel", "summary": "my boyfriend wants to move out for financial reasons, but wants to stay together. I might suffer financially if he does."}
{"id": "t3_2xiqwa", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "How to recover for an all nighter, and prepare for another one very soon?", "post": "I have a very busy schedule this semester, so I've had 4 tests this past week, and another two tests in 4 days. \n\nI understand time management would have prevented this, but I felt overwhelmed and had a breakdown which wasted even more time.\n\nBack to the point:  I got about 3 hours of sleep and about 2 hour naps everyday for 5 continuous days because of a very hectic schedule this week.\n\nShould I listen to my body and not set any alarms, and just sleep until I naturally wake up? Or should I get 8 hours of sleep and drink coffee if I find myself getting tired (in order to maintain a structured sleep schedule)? I slept for about 15 hours today, which I could have used to study but I could hardly keep my eyes open.\n\nAlso, are there any huge health risks from this one week (first time I've ever done this) that I should worry about?\n\nThanks reddit.", "summary": "got about 3 hours of sleep a night for 5 days, should I let my body recover and just sleep until I wake up, or should I try to get back on a normal sleep schedule?"}
{"id": "t3_24caom", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [26F] with my Bf [26 M] of a year and half. I'm terrified our relationship will end because he's asked me to be 100% responsible for our sex life.", "post": "We fell in love years ago as kids and after a decade of friendship we decided to give it a real go. I learned fairly quickly that he was not nearly as sexual as I am. This was a huge shock to me. Through the years we would flirt with each, send sexy texts and sometimes photos. He seemed to love it. He offered so many compliments and truly made me feel sexy. Now that we're together he has instigated sex twice. Of course we've talked about it but the conversation always ends with him asking me to do a better job turning him on. I'm getting exhausted and feel it's completely unfair to ask for one person to hold the weight in the relationship. Are we not adults?", "summary": "Finally ended up with my soul mate. Turns out a relationship to him requires me to do all the sexy work. Need help!"}
{"id": "t3_13lbuz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20m) want to say goodbye to her (19f) and don't know how.", "post": "I met a girl 10 months ago on r4r. Good times, bad times, and okay times, and everything in between have been had. I love her with everything that I am and our relationship is wonderful. However I am not a good boyfriend, a good worker, or a good anything for that matter. She is everything that any person could ever want and I want to say goodbye so she can survive without this burden that is me. \n\nShe reads these forums and since I am a slight coward when it comes to goodbyes the impersonal post may be the best. \n\nI love you Sarah. Please continue being awesome.", "summary": "There is a large container of bleach and ammonia next to me and i'm fixing to go to sleep. This is my goodbye."}
{"id": "t3_3f7zfx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [18 F] of 8 months, I'm having a problem with her believing and i don't know why", "post": "Hello Reddit. Thanks in advance for reading my post and thank you so much for answers. I have been with my girlfriend for 8 months and we love each other so much and i can't imagine myself without her.\n\nI'm not beliving in god, and she is christian. Her religion is not causing any trouble actually. She don't talk about it with me and she accept i don't believe. I can't really explain my problem. I just feel a bit scared about religions in general after watching movies and documentaries about religions and how they can in some cases be very bad. I know these movies is taken to the extreme, and that most religions are nice, but still they scared me because i'm for some reason generelising all religions which is totally wrong.\n\nNot only movies changed my mind, but also other people telling bad stories. I'm not as open-minded as i used to be. And i just want to be, i really wish i could just not think about it.\n\nEverytime i think about her believing i get a bad feeling inside. I have tried to talk with her about it, but it makes her sad. I know that Christian people are good people, and i really don't know why i feel this way. I want to be more open-minded. I want, but don't know how. How can i stop this bad feeling inside me?", "summary": "Having a bad feeling inside that i can't fully explain, because of my girlfriends belief. I want to be more open-minded and get this feeling away."}
{"id": "t3_40cfd4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] with my girlfriend [19F] of a year and a half have found out she has gotten pregnant from when I came home from leave from the military.", "post": "I am in the Navy and stationed domestically, but several states away from home. I came home for a couple of weeks, had a lot of sex, and now she's pregnant (according to a test she bought).\n\nMy dad, my stepmom, their son (my half brother), and everyone they interact with dislike her for stupid reasons. My mother loves her to death.\n\nI am scared to tell my family. I am scared that my family will disown me. My dad's family has disowned his sister, and I am afraid that they might do the same to me one day.\n\nI am scared that I'll be like my mom and either become an alcoholic or leave my child. And it wouldn't be hard being so far away from home.\n\nI am scared that my girlfriend and I will grow up and hate each other or be forced into a marriage we're not ready to be in yet.\n\nI am scared I'll be a failure. I just got into the Navy, got into my first command recently, and I'm afraid my performance and everything will go to shit.\n\nI'm afraid I won't ever go to college and get a good job. I'm afraid that I'm leaving my girlfriend with a kid at home and she'll resent me for still being able to pursue my career and ambitions, and she's at home taking care of a baby instead of following her own dreams.\n\nI'm scared people will make fun of her for getting pregnant so young.\n\nI'm scared I won't be able to provide adequately or be a shitty father.\n\nI'm scared that I didn't realize I was so stupid and not careful.", "summary": "Got my girlfriend pregnant. A lot of my family dislikes her. Oh, and I'm in the Navy, which means she gets to deal with the pregnancy and baby while I'm away working and getting an education."}
{"id": "t3_3xs5uv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29/f] with my ex-bf [25/m] should i go see him?", "post": "we broke up about a month ago and went no contact for a few weeks, until he messaged me to say he wanted to let me know how much he missed me. he also told me he had sex with someone else and it made him realize how much he treasured our time spent together. understandably it made me upset but i thought him reaching out could be the first step towards reconciliation. we made plans for me to visit him (part of the reason we broke up is because we were in a LDR), but on the night before i was to go, i brought up the girl he hooked up with, and what he expected for our future. he was confused about what he wanted but by the end of the conversation decided in the absolute we weren't getting back together. \n\nhowever, he called me this morning and asked me to come visit him after all, and that he didn't care what happened after, as in the emotional after-effects of seeing each other again.\n\ni get the sense he's using me to abate his own loneliness, but so am i. should i go see him?", "summary": "ex-bf wants me to visit him, but it's almost 99% positive we're not getting back together. should i still go?"}
{"id": "t3_137uxi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Reddit, how do I (22F) stop my boyfriend (22M) of two years from determining my mood?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for two years now, and a few months ago went through a wee hiccough. We're back together now and enjoy each other's company more than ever.. \n\nBut I can find myself falling back into the old routine of things. I'm obsessing over him and want to see him every day. If he's unavailable, I find myself getting really upset, and if he doesn't text back I feel really down. I DON'T WANT TO BE A STAGE FIVE CLINGER!!! (I don't tell him he makes me feel this way 'cos I know how irrational I'm being). On the other hand, when we're together and he's showing affection I feel like the luckiest girl on the planet..\n\nI know this is unhealthy, and I *do not* want to depend on him in this way.\n\nI want to know how I can break this habit; Reddit, can you help?", "summary": "Feel my moods depend entirely on how my boyfriend treats me, how do I break out of this habit and regain my independent emotions?"}
{"id": "t3_4nqlxp", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I desperately want to leave my job. Looking for advice", "post": "Thank you in advance for anyone taking the time to read/reply to this. Last August, I (29M) started working full time after a LONG period of unemployment. Before that I worked freelance as a graphic/web designer and photographer but it wasn't enough to make a decent living. I own professional equipment and have 5 weddings under my belt, but my biggest problem is self-promotion and advertising (I'm not the most confident person when it comes to selling myself). At this new job, I'm working 40+ hours a week making $15/hr. The job is related to my field (graphic design), but it's not a creative position. I'm basically pumping out orders for this company based off of templates. The first few months were okay since I was learning new techniques and a new program, but now I feel like a robot and this place is sucking the life/energy out of me. There is no sick time, no personal time, the building itself is not well-maintained, and there is nowhere to move up in the company. The only thing keeping me going is the idea that it's not permanent. My plan was to make it a year at this place, save some money, and figure out the rest when the time came. I live with my SO and am lucky to have very low expenses (<$500/mo) I've managed to save around 15k in the time I've been there. I miss the freedom that came with freelance work, but having a steady paycheck is certainly nice. It's very tough to find a job in my area, so on one hand I feel lucky to be in the situation I'm in, but on the other I feel like I can do much better.", "summary": "I feel like I'm losing my mind working full time, I have marketable skills but no marketing skill, I'm torn on whether or not I should leave and pursue freelance work or stick it out as long as I possibly can.."}
{"id": "t3_11hwjk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm naturally lazy, how do I get motivated to work?", "post": "I'm a self taught programmer, never finished college because I'm lazy at school. I don't feel studying back then because I think it won't do me any good with my chosen career (I was taking up library science but really like programming anyway)\n\nNow I'm working as a web developer. And often time I just spend my time playing console games or play league of legends or browse reddit instead of working. I just don't feel working. It's not that I hate work, as a matter of fact I think I have the best boss in the world. The pay is good. All the good things actually. But I dont know why Im lazy.\n\nReddit, how do I get motivated at work?", "summary": "college d.o, self taught programmer, working now as a web dev, plays video games instead of work, please help me become motivated."}
{"id": "t3_jzwi6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I tell her?", "post": "Hi Reddit.  Let me begin my question with a story.  I apologize that I am skimping on details, but I dont want anybody to find out who I am.  Anyway, I met this girl last summer in South America.  (We are both from the US).  From the second I met her, I immediately thought that I had never seen anyone as gorgeous as she was.  I'll spare you the gooey details, but just assume that I became immediately crazy about her.  We became really close while we were there, but our vacation ended with an abrupt halt after two and a half weeks.  I was madly distraught on the plane flight home, and was a wreck for weeks over how much I missed her, and how sad I was that I never really told her how I felt.  I told some of my friends, and they all said that I would get over her in due time.  Well, it has been over a year, I haven't seen her in person the whole time, and I'm still as, if not more, crazy about her.  The only times I really get to talk to her are our rare Skype \"dates,\" but other than that, nothing.  We were so close in South America, but I don't know if she still feels the same way that I do.  How do I tell someone I haven't seen in over a year that I am still crazy about them?", "summary": "Crazy in love with this girl, haven't seen her in a year, how do I tell her I still have feelings for her?"}
{"id": "t3_5355nq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34 F] with my partner [36 M] 5 yrs, kinda bored, are we settling?", "post": "So we've been together for a bit and we're solid house partners and friends. No drama, v. little fighting. We split housework and financial responsibilities. We're both gainfully employed, me teaching middle school, him teaching college. The small tussles we get into are pretty easily managed--usually just grumpy sniping at one another, pretty infrequent. \n\nSounds perfect, right? We've been talking about kids-- I'm at the age where I kinda need to fish or cut bait. I'm into it, but not, like, chomping at the bit. \n\nHere's the thing. We're not very, well, INTO each other. We had constant sex when we were first together and now it's infrequent-- though still good when it happens. We spend a lot of free time doing things separately, and sometimes it feels like we're just roommates-with-occasional-benefits. I grew up with parents who were relentlessly practical about relationships and I feel like I've kind of settled into their pattern.\n\nWhen we talk about kids, sometimes there's this little tiny voice that kind of goes, \"Um, do you really want to be in this relationship forever?\" I'm the sort that becomes more like the person I'm with than I think is good for me-- being with him is drama-free, but it's also pretty sedentary and not very spontaneous. I had two awesome, adventurous parents and I loved my childhood. I worry that we're sort of bad influences on each other. Also, the thought of co-parenting with an ex sounds awful (no offense to folks who are divorced or had divorced parents).\n\nAm I crazy to complain? At my age, shouldn't I be happy to be with a drama-free friend who's also a good partner? Or if I go into it bored, will it get worse?", "summary": "Partner and I have a \"slowing\" effect on each other, though we're solid partners otherwise. Thinking of kids and wondering if it's a good match for the future."}
{"id": "t3_24rlqb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] just started talking to a girl [20 F] that I've known for awhile. We started chatting on FB and said we should be friends, but I'm attracted to her.", "post": "So I've \"known\" this girl since like middle school, but we never talked until I started messaging her on Facebook recently. I would just spark up short conversations here and there asking her questions about our common career path of nursing.\n\nHowever, last night I actually felt like our conversation was more than what it usually is. The feeling became more friendly and informal. We talked longer than usual too and even agreed literally at one point that we should \"be friends\" and \"hangout.\" I told her we should even get lunch at one point.\n\nHere's the thing, I've been single for 2 years now and I'm a bit attracted to her. I like the idea of being platonic friends at first but I have a feeling I will unconsciously do something that will give her signals of my attraction toward her. I've been contemplating whether or not I should pay for our first lunch as well. I don't want to creep her off, so I'm not sure what I should do? Should I strictly keep it platonic? Won't this automatically friend-zone me if I ever want to start something in the future with her?", "summary": "Want to be friends with recent girl I started talking to on Facebook, but I'm attracted to her. Keep it strictly platonic or make a move?"}
{"id": "t3_w6zvk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need some help: GF is mad at me because I told her that something she did in bed didn't feel good. She's barely talking to me now, what do I do?", "post": "I'm 22, and so is she. We've been dating for about a month now. She was doing something with her hands while giving me head and I told her that it didn't feel good. She got really upset and left my house. \n\nLater that day, I was talking to a friend of my and vaguely described the situation. She said that it was understandable that my girlfriend got mad, and in retrospect I understand now too.\n\nLast night, I was talking over the situation with my girlfriend over the phone and told her that I was talking to a friend of mine about it. She is now madder than ever and doesn't want to talk to me.\n\nShe's upset that I'm not going out of my way to correct the situation, but I honestly haven't been doing much thinking about it.", "summary": "Girlfriend isn't good at giving head, got mad because I told her, now doesn't want to talk to me because I talked to a friend about it."}
{"id": "t3_1cyd80", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "So I accepted a position, knowing I might be changing my mind...", "post": "I'm soon to graduate, and have had a few interviews with companies all in rapid succession. All have gone well. I got an offer on one very quickly, and feel very confident about the other two. \nThe one I got an offer on is basically my backup plan. It'd be a fun position, but it's lower pay than what the other jobs would be, fairly significantly (10-15k, if not more). I delayed them as long as I could; I was told by one to expect an answer within 2 weeks, and 2 1/2 weeks later, I've heard nothing (contacting their HR recruiter after the 2 week mark just got me the answer that \"they're still deciding\"). \nI can't afford to be unemployed on graduation, so I went ahead and accepted the position on the last day I was given to make the decision; I stalled them as long as I could knowing it wasn't my first choice. I also know I can't count on the other two jobs coming through. That said, if either of the other two come through, I'll almost certainly tell the company I accepted an offer from that I changed my mind and take the other offer.\nHow badly would this be burning a bridge? Are there other potential negative repurcussions that I'm not considering? I really didn't want to do it, but, from my POV, I didn't have much of a choice if I was going to make sure I had a job lined up.", "summary": "I felt forced into accepting my backup plan position, knowing I'll be \"changing my mind\" if I get another offer I'm expecting. Am I shooting myself in the foot here?"}
{"id": "t3_10rjpb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "What types of things can we do together?(20/m&f 3.5+ years)", "post": "Me and my boyfriend have been together on and off for almost four years now. We've been really really great since getting back together- we've actually been better than ever. But let's cut to the chase. We don't have a lot of hobbies we can partake in together. We usually smoke a little bit, watch some things on Netflix, browse reddit, go out to eat sometimes, we hike occasionally... He tends to feel very dragged down by excessive sitting around a lot- I'm very complacent, I could be fine doing almost anything really. Our problem, though, is that neither of us have a lot of money to spend seeing as we're both trying to save up and we're unsure of what things we can do together. \nI'm really terrible with hand eye coordination and thus tend to suck hard at video games or things like that. I'm also not terribly talented at athletics for similar reasons. Any sort of suggestions would be much appreciated.", "summary": "We're great we just need more things to do together. I suck with things requiring hand eye coordination and atheltics."}
{"id": "t3_2weufp", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "What could be causing this 'Phantom Smoke' smell?", "post": "Age: 18 Sex: Male\n\nDuration: Half a year more or less\n\nI've been smelling smoke that isn't there for a while now. I can never seem to pinpoint a cause or even a correlation. It just comes and goes randomly. They're very brief smells, but they can be very strong.\n\nI got it checked out by a GP in November last year, who then recommended I go see an ENT. ENT isn't free until January.\n\nFast forward to January, I see the ENT. He checks my ears, nose, and throat. He cleaned my ears, and stuck a thing (don't know what it's called) up my nostrils to check for tumors in the nasal passage. Everything was clear, and he figures it might be a damaged nerve. He said that it might fix itself in time. Which didn't make sense to me since the smells have gotten more frequent and stronger, yet still random.\n\nTells me to get a CT scan done just to be sure there are no tumors. Got the CT scan done, fast forward a week or so, got a call from the ENT and says that it's all clear. No tumors.\n\nNo tumors is great, but surely there's a definitive answer as to what is causing these phantom smells, right?\n\nI've read up about migraine auras and how they usually come before a migraine, but I ruled that out since I don't get migraines after the smell happens.", "summary": "I've been smelling phantom smoke (smells kind of like cigarettes), go to ENT and then get CT scan, no tumors. Can't figure out could be causing this."}
{"id": "t3_140i9m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My 29 year old boyfriend lives at home", "post": "My boyfriend (29) and I (28F) have been together for about 7 months. We have a really great relationship and have many things in common except for one...I have my own place and he lives with his mother. \nBefore we made our relationship official, I did bring up his living situation and he told me he only moved back to her house a year ago after he and his long term ex broke up. He told me that he's saving money and plans on getting his own place soon. That was over 7 months ago. \nI've never seen him look for a place or a room mate or even mention it. I also have doubts that he's saving money because he waits tables and talks about being low on money. \n\nNOW, so you don't think I'm being a shallow, bitchy girlfriend, I do want to add some of his backstory...\nI know that he can get a better job than the serving position he has at a restaurant. He was in the Air Force for 4 years and decided not to reenlist. I don't blame him for that because he saw a lot of fucked up things while he was deployed. He now has the opportunity get paid to go to school (with the GI bill) or he could get a contracting job that pays well.  \nAm I in the wrong for wanting him to use his full potential? I feel like he is so unmotivated but I don't want to offend or nag him about it...he's pretty sensitive. I could easily see myself marrying this guy but this is definitely something to think about for our future.", "summary": "My 29 year old boyfriend lives with his mother, although he has opportunities to find a better job and get his own place. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_vtrk0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "To those of you currently struggling with an /r/aww addiction, and those of you in recovery, is this how you got hooked?", "post": "Keep in mind, that i only found reddit about two weeks ago (the eternal war thing brought me, and i've been trapped here ever since). Up until two days ago i was raging to myself about having to sift through all these damn cats and \"karma machines\" on the front page, thinking to myself \"what's the deal with all the cats?  You gotta be some kinda nut to post a picture of a cat.\"\n\n...and now here i am with this post... \n\ni'm browsing the front page, see a post with a picture about a cat eating through the bag to get at the food,  and immediately my brain goes: \"Hey, we've got a picture of our wife's cat doing something like that, we should post it!\"\n\nBased on the sheer volume of /r/aww posts, i have rationalised that this kind of behaviour is more habit forming than smoking or crack or heroine.  i don't even like cats:  the little bastard my wife had, used to piss in my shoes.  Ever put your foot into cold cat piss first thing in the morning, half awake cause you slept in, and already late for work?  No sir, i don't like 'em.\n\n\"Best we don't play with fire, kid.\" i tells my brain, and i put the idea aside, and go about my business.\n\nThat was yesterday. \n\nToday i am apparently STILL thinking about this damn picture, and i gotta ask, is this how you got hooked? \n\nWhat kind of warning signs should i look for in myself and others, that they may be at risk of doing /r/aww, or may have already developed a problem with /r/aww?\n\nWhat kind of supports and treatments are available for those addicted to /r/aww? Is there a twelve step program?", "summary": "saw post from /r/aww about a cat doing something, reminded of wife's cat doing something similar, shares unrelated cat piss anecdote (f u cat!) ,  asks questions about addiction."}
{"id": "t3_xjrg5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Conflicted.", "post": "Hi reddit,\n\nI am a 30/m and I've been in a relationship for 6 years with a girl younger than me, but not by much. I love her. She is the most pure, kind person I'll ever meet. She understands me, I understand her and we have always considered each other soul mates. I am very, very lucky.\n\nWhat brings me here, then?\n\nLast weekend, I went out for afternoon drinks with some friends. They all left quite early in the evening and I decided to stay out drinking on my own. Not usual for me at all but I've been feeling a bit jaded in general lately.\n\nI ended up meeting a girl at one bar I went to and I felt that same damn spark I haven't felt in a long time. She knew about my relationship from the start and nothing physical happened between us. We just spent hours talking and going from bar to bar with some of her friends. The subtext wasn't as innocent however.\n\nIn addition to a good dose of well-deserved guilt, I am now completely conflicted. Everything I thought I knew isn't. Or, I was in denial and the truth just hit me in the face. Or, nothing much happened but I was so drunk it seemed amazing. I'm not sure what to believe.\n\nThis girl gave me her number, \"if ever things should change\". I threw it out in a panic when I got home and the trash had gone when I went back to get it. Part of me is happy about that. Part of me really wants it back even though I'm not sure what I'd do with it.\n\nI don't necessarily want a relationship with this other girl. I *really* don't want to end my current relationship. All I know is I would like that feeling of excitement in my life more often.\n\nCan anyone offer some advice?", "summary": "I'm with someone I love but I met someone new and I had a lot of fun and want it to continue."}
{"id": "t3_39jb7q", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(KS) Video without consent on youtube, reuploaded with a blurred face", "post": "Okay, so my younger brothers were out and about when they passed some teenagers who yelled obscenities at them. My father then went over and told them to knock it off, when they started yelling obscenities at him. My dad, with a small amount of temper, got angry and yelled at them. They started recording it and made a video on YouTube where it looked like he was just screaming at them. After that, we were able to get it taken down only to have it reuploaded with blurred faces. We have in no way given consent to be in this video. Is there any way we can get them to take it doen?", "summary": "My brothers were harassed by teenagers and then my father went to the teenagers and they uploaded a video of him making him look like a bad guy. Is there any way for it to be taken down, even it they blurred his face?"}
{"id": "t3_o91nf", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Just starting, trying to stay positive..", "post": "Hello all!\n\nSo my weight as of late has gotten pretty high. Im 5'9\" and Im at 280 and its really driving me crazy. As of the past week I started doing the elliptical every day. Started at 15 minute sessions, then going to 30 pushups (3 sets of 10) and same for sit ups. Ive worked up to 30 min elliptical and 5 sets of 10 of pushups and situps. What else I can I do to burn some fat? Im tracking/logging meals throughout the day and not breaking 2,000 calories each day which feels right. I guess im getting a bit impatient but I guess i have to keep adding more time to my elliptical and do more and more on the ground with pushups and situps. Any thoughts on this? All are welcome!", "summary": "What else can I do besides elliptical (adding time day after day) and situps and pushups? I dont have free weights or elastic bands or anything."}
{"id": "t3_2pclv0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22 M] girlfriend [18 F] of 3 months was manipulated into breaking up with me. Advice needed.", "post": "Before my girlfriend and I started dating she (in her words, kinda) liked a guy named Bill. Her and Bill never worked out due to age differences of what I am understanding.  I start dating her shortly after and things seemed to be going smoothly.\n\nFast forward 3 months, she tells me that she wants to break up. She says that our relationship isn't as close as she would want and doesn't feel connected. She also tells me that she has been feeling this way for 2 weeks. I respond by telling her to think about it (since this type of situation can be worked out) and if she still feels the same way I'm not going to be angry or anything about her breaking up with me. I completely felt at fault and tried to think about when I was being distant with her.\n\nThe next day I talk to her the story COMPLETELY changes. This time she tells me that Bill told her that our relationship is flawed and we seem distant (we all work at the same place.) He apparently convinced her that I was not right for her.  She also tells me that he ended up kissing her about a week before this.  She also adds that she started to like him during this same time frame. She emphasizes that she fell for me though and truly does not want to break up. \n\nI was more upset that she wouldn't tell me that she had any issues with our relationship and instead bypassed communicating with me just to break up.\n\nShe tells me that she isn't talking to Bill anymore and, again, that she fell for me.  \n\nI'm a not very knowledgeable when it comes to relationships but I personally feel that if she can't voice her problems to me, there is probably a problem.  I also feel that if she can be this easily manipulated, there also might be a problem.\n\nOn one hand I want to give her the benefit of the doubt because I truly do enjoy spending time with her. But on the other hand this type of situation could've easily been avoided with some common sense to just talk to me.\n\nI would love to hear any thoughts because at this point I'm just trying my best to figure out the best solution.", "summary": "Girlfriend breaks up with me.  Turns out she was manipulated by her (slight) crush.  No idea were to go from here."}
{"id": "t3_1jv6un", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Gee, thanks for inviting me.", "post": "I invited this girl to a theme park with me. Things got a bit strange there, as we held hands together and she grabbed me and hugged me on a couple of rides. After the theme park she goes, \"omg thanks for the best theme park trip ever <3 :).\" The next day she asked me to go to some youth thing her church is having. I said sure and she went on and on about how \"this meant a whole lot to her\" and how \"we're gonna have a great time :).\" I thought it was gonna be fun too, but at the actual thing she left me alone to my own devices, with total strangers (I wasn't sure about going for THIS EXACT REASON.) The next day was worse... She brought another guy with her and not only did she ignore me and ditch me again, she started getting all touchy-feely with this guy. Gee, I can see how much my presence means to her... I know we aren't actually dating yet or anything but man, that sucked big time to see her like that. I am contemplating not going anymore (its a week-long event) but the discussions and \"sermons\" are actually enlightening and to not go would basically ignore the teachings of said sermons - but I don't know if I really would enjoy seeing her like this and what effect it will have on my feelings in the long run (so far I feel hurt and neglected...)", "summary": "girl invites me to something she ditches me at; forgets I'm a human being at one point or another."}
{"id": "t3_1sk28x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21/F] loaned my sister [21/F] money, instead of paying me back she got me an expensive gift.", "post": "I loaned my sister $200 because her pay from the military was delayed when all that was happening a little while ago.   \n\nOn Black Friday she called me and let me know she just got me a really great gift. I told her I didn't know what I was getting her, but not to spend a lot, and she said \"Oh you don't have to get me anything else, you've already got me something. Don't worry, the gift is worth the money\" or something like that, saying she spent the same amount that I spent on her.\n\nIt's conflicted me ever since and I don't know what to do- $200 is a lot of money for one Christmas gift, as that is what I was planning to spend on my family altogether. But also, $200 is a lot to spend on ME. I never told her it was a gift, and we talked about when she would pay me back at the time I loaned her the money.\n\nShould I say something? Ask her to return it? Are Black Friday deals returnable?", "summary": "Instead of paying me back $200, my sister bought me a $200 Christmas gift and I don't what to say without hurting her."}
{"id": "t3_2ral00", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my best friend [18F] she's wanting to get back with an ex, unsure how to react?", "post": "I'll start with the basics. Me and my best friend (Call her Rose from now on) have been really close friends since September now. Several people have even assumed us as being in a relationship before we are that close.\n\nShe started going out with a pretty good guy in October, it was long distance though and just didn't work out so she broke up with him before New Year. \n\nHardly a week later she gets a message from one of her ex's who she went out with before me and Rose met. From what she has told me she was really happy with him. He was great in many ways for her, they had good chemistry basically. But he dumped her after 9 months because they hadn't had sex yet. Rose told me that had he waited she feels like they would still be together even now. She clearly really likes this guy still and I want her to be happy.\n\nBut I can't shake off this feeling that he's a scumbag. I just think it's despicable to dump someone just because they want to wait a bit longer before they're comfortable to have sex. Surely if you really cared about them and not just about the sex you'd wait a bit?\n\nFor a bit of context this is the UK, so legal age is 16 and they were 16/17 at the time of their relationship.\n\nSo what should I do? I want her to be happy, but I think getting back together with this guy, even if she was in a very happy relationship with him previously, is the wrong thing for her to do.", "summary": "Best friend started talking with ex who dumped her for not having sex, she wants to get back with him. How to react?"}
{"id": "t3_j4pcm", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Anyone have any advice on how to get my terrier to stop being a douche to other dogs?", "post": "I have a four year old Cairn Terrier, and for the first year and a half of his life, he was perfectly fine around other dogs. I would even have friends bring their dogs into my house, and he would be fine. I went back to school for my senior year of college, and when I came home for break, my mother explained that he just growls and snaps at other dogs whenever he sees them.\n\nHe seems to be fine with dogs his own breed and even terriers around the same size, but having him lunge at a random dog across the street when I walk him is something I can't deal with anymore. On top of that, I was hoping to be able to get another rescue, but obviously I can't do that until he calms the hell down. I've started being more forceful about establishing myself as Alpha and making sure he walks correctly on lead, and have even gotten him to stop barking on the few occasions we run into dogs on his walks by focusing his attention on me. I'm just looking for more advice on how to do this. He was completely fine before, and I'm hoping to help him get to that point again, but I have no idea how to start.", "summary": "My dog freaks the hell out whenever he sees another dog. How do I get him to not have the urge to growl and attack?"}
{"id": "t3_ftjz0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I am leaving home to go to college soon and don't know how to deal with it.  Help?", "post": "I am going to attend the University of Texas next year, which is a good three hours from my hometown of Houston.  I've forgotten how to make friends, as I haven't had to do it since 6th grade.  I don't know how to do my own laundry, cook, or do anything involving living on my own.  Any helpful tips in these areas would be...helpful.  However, my primary concern lies in my relationship with my girlfriend.  Yeah, I know, HEY EVERYBODY THIS GUY HAS A GIRLFRIEND and all of that stuff.  But the main problem is, she's going to Texas State, not UT, which is a good 40 minutes to an hour away, and she is the only one with the car.  Now I love her to death, and she loves me too (otherwise we wouldn't have been dating the last two years and such), but I am worried about our relationship.  We go to different high schools now, but I still see her at least two or three times a week.  Going to different colleges, I am not sure that we will see each other nearly that much without her sacrificing her life at school to come to Austin to see me.  I feel that every time we bring up the topic, the outlook is bleaker and bleaker.  I just really don't know how to handle the whole situation.  I want to stay together more than anything in the world, but I really don't want her to sacrifice her social life or college experience either.  People of Reddit, what should I do?  As I said before, and help would be very....helpful.", "summary": "going to college, need tips.  More importantly, what to do about gf going to college an hour away."}
{"id": "t3_1e57sm", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Crushing on friend's(who was a FWB) best friend.", "post": "So I met this girl about half a year ago. We got along great. On the third or fourth time hanging out we had sex, I lost my virginity to her. We dated for a little while 1-2 dates. But we established that we're just friends. We did have sex a few more times after that, but have stopped (been a month or 6 weeks or so) \n\nWell I've been crushing on her friend, like I just think about her all different hours of the day. I asked my friend about three months ago if she would be okay with me dating her best friend. She got upset, but she knew I wasn't hers, and did get over it. But she said she would be okay with it, so long as she didn't hear/know about it. Well last night me and her best friend hung out last night. Actually it was the three of us, and she left, leaving me and her friend at the hookah bar together. We just chilled and talked. It was really great, she seemed to have been enjoying herself quite a bit. I feel like its the wrong thing to do, to want her. But I know myself to an extent. And I don't crush like this over any girl. She is someone special, not like she means the world to me, but she did get me to feel about her like most girls don't do. Is dating her wrong? Should I talk to someone about this? Talk to one, or both friends about this? This girl has been on my mind for months, I don't think her place there is going anywhere. Should I suppress my feelings?", "summary": "Lost virginity to friend, had sex a few times, never had anything serious with her. Interested in dating her best friend. Asking for advice or just a voice that can relate."}
{"id": "t3_mxjah", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I want to look into some education options for system administrators.  Can someone elaborate on my options for me?", "post": "A little bit of background for you.  I graduated with a bachelor's in technical writing but did tech support for Dell for about a year before getting into my tech writing gig.  I've always been the guy that is never sure what his strengths are, or what he wants to do for the rest of his life.  I know I love computers and after transferring out of my tech writing position into a sales position, I know that I want out.\n\nI have the option of going back to my old job, but even then I don't really see myself there long-term.  I am looking at some AA degrees from my local community college.  \n\nIn case you are still with me, here is my dilemma.  I know I am a professional adult who is employable, but I don't know which field really interests me.  The available tracks are: cisco and telecommunications, Microsoft certified systems engineer, unix/linux system administration.  Unix/Linux admin & MCSE interests me more than Cisco.  I'm very interested working in a Windows environment (but that is probably just because what I am used to... I rarely use linux).\n\nThoughts? Advice? All is appreciated.", "summary": "i want the education to become a system admin, but I have no idea what I want to do.  Seeking advice to diagnose my strengths/interests in an effort to launch myself into a new career."}
{"id": "t3_oxiwb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "A girl I like went away today, I couldn't say some things I intended. Am I a coward if I write to her?", "post": "So, long story, but this girl I like went back to where she is from today. \n\nI've been liking her for many months, I think she knows very well that I do like her, because half this time I made many attempts to be with her.  \nShe now is my friend (we share friends) and I know she cares for me. I don't want to be one of those persons that complains about the \"friendzone\", I like being her friend but it hurts sometimes.\n\nAt least I would like her to acknowledge that I have feelings for her, and that she treat them with respect.\n\nOf course, I think that deep inside me I would like her to acknowledge that she likes me, but the truth is that she doesn't...\n\nSo reddit, should I write her? even if it's something short? I don't know if I'll meet here again, it could be that she comes back in a month, or maybe I'll never see her again.\n\nI feel guilty for not having the courage of asking her for a time alone last night and said all these things. Also, I'm trying to be more confident, and I feel that taking the \"easy\" way of writing would be counterproductive.\n\nThanks everyone for some insight in this, I'm confused. Also, I'm not an English native.\n\n**She 23, me F 26 (sort of SAP)", "summary": "I didn't have the courage to explain myself before a girl I like went away and I'm trying to be more confident. Should I write to her or should I suck it up and try to move on?"}
{"id": "t3_2u23d4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [18 M] having difficulty interpreting signals from a girl I'm interested in [18 F] who has limited English skills (Thai)", "post": "For the past few months, I've been intermittently attempting to court a classmate of mine. We see each other every once in a while and we have built up a pretty solid rapport. The issue is that she can be incredibly hard to read. It's difficult to tell if her over-friendliness is flirting or if she is compensating for her verbal impediment. Since her first language is Thai and she struggles with English (able to hold a conversation but often misses a lot of information), I've had to adjust my way of speaking and it's difficult to talk to her with the confidence I'd normally have. At one point, I tried to ask her our, but halfway through, it became clear that she didn't know I was asking her out so, out of embarrassment, I backed away from the subject.\n\nI'm usually not the sort of person to be bold and direct when it comes to these things, I'd only ask someone out if I were sure they were at least a little interested in me. If she were any other girl, I'd be certain she was interested. But the amount of factors that come into it are ridiculous. I don't know what to expect from her. I don't know what sort of guy a Thai girl would be interested in (if I could make such a sweeping generalization) or what the differences in dating customs are. And I can't tell if she has a genuine interest in me or if the \"signals\" I get are her using body language to compensate for her English skills.\n\nI'd appreciate any advice on approaching the situation (whether it's specific to ELL relationships, Thai culture, or just dating in general).", "summary": "I like a Thai girl but can't tell if she's really flirting with me or just accidentally flirting due to limited English skills."}
{"id": "t3_2b8cg5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/F] I'm his boss, but was he trying to ask me out?", "post": "Bear with me here, there is a bit of a story. \n\nSo I am a part time manager at my movie theater job (one step above staff member), My general manager has a \"managers can't even be friends with staff\" rule which I frequently ignore. In my opinion he has no say over what I do when I'm not at work as long as it's not effecting my job performance. \n\nThe other day I was working as the only Manager on duty and I spent a lot of the day talking to this one guy, we'll call him Joe. Joe and I often talk a lot on shifts but never really about anything personal, more like latest movies, what we did on the weekend etc. \n\nAt the end of his shift I brought Joe into the office to balance his cash drawer and he waited until we were in there alone and said out of no where \"Do you want to see deliver us from evil\"\n\nI didn't think anything of it and responded by saying \"I do want to see it, I like scary movies but none of my friends will ever watch them with me.\"\n\nTo which he responded \"because I kind of want to see it...\" At that point someone else knocked on the door and we weren't alone in the office anymore so that was it. \n\nNow he's away on a family trip for the next 2 and a half weeks. \n\nWas he trying to ask me if I wanted to see that movie with him? or was he just making small talk?", "summary": "I'm his boss at the movie theatre, he asked me if I wanted to see a movie and I don't know if he meant see it with him, or just see it in general."}
{"id": "t3_37qw8t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 F] am worried that I should break up with my boyfriend [19 M] of 3 years because long distance is causing him to lose confidence and trust in me.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 years; we were high school sweethearts and just finished our first year of college long distance. This is my first serious relationship. Our first couple years were great and honeymoon-y. But lately we are constantly arguing primarily because he thinks that I am not as committed to the relationship as he is. \n\nHe tells me that I don't include him when we are together, I lack empathy, and I deliberately make jokes at his expense. He is also worried that I will leave him for a macho guy who is more reserved with his emotions like I am because he knows how much it bothers me when he brings up these flaws of mine. \n\nI should also mention that through this first year of college he has become depressed and insecure with himself. One night when he was drinking with friends he saw his buddy and buddy's girlfriend get into a fight because the girl said she knew a guy who was more attractive than her boyfriend. My boyfriend then asked me over text if I thought anyone was more attractive that him. I thought he would know I was lying if I said no one, so I told him I did and he demanded that I tell him who. I listed 2 people and he has not been able to trust me the same ever since. His confidence is now squashed beyond repair and he thinks more than ever that I'll leave him for someone better. \n\nI love him so much and just 2 months ago I could see us getting married and having a future, and that's a major part that makes the idea of ending it so difficult. But the more he accuses me of not being committed, the more I think he is right and feel like I should just end it. I don't want to prove him right that I didn't care about him enough, and I don't want to intensify his depression by bringing his fears to life. but I also don't want to stay in a relationship that is unhealthy and doomed to fail anyway. \n\nI'm not fishing for affirmations here, feel free to tell me that I'm being a dick. I just have no idea what the right thing to do is. Advice?", "summary": "Should I break up with my long term boyfriend who no longer trusts me? Or is there a way to calm him down while staying long distance?"}
{"id": "t3_3mkcsr", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by cleaning the bench", "post": "So this actually happened today. I work at a large sporting stadium, normally as a bar tender and today I was working in a kiosk i hadn't worked at before. At the clean up point in the shift one of the satff asked me to wipe the '....' i did not hear what she said, It sounded like benches, but that didn't seem right so i asked \"did you say clean the benches?\", to which her response was yea the benches. I was looking outside the kiosk at some of the park benches around the stadium thinking ok, this is wierd but whatever. At some bars I had cleaned tables outside the bar, and i was just like whatever, if that's how it works over here. Turns out that's not how it worked over there. when she confirmed benches, she meant the kitchen benches. Hind sight is a bitch. at this point she just explained to the other staff that i was just outside the kiosk scrubbing at a random bench. They all had a good laugh and poked fun for the rest of the shift. The fact that some of the girls there were also quite pretty made the embarrassment even worse. Felt pretty retarded after that. Really hoping i don't get rostered there again any time soon.", "summary": "misheard a direction at work, clarification phrase did not clarify, ended up scrubbing at a random bench and looking like a tard for 1st impressions."}
{"id": "t3_yqkdq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend is angry and confrontational. I'm a doormat", "post": "My boyfriend (26) is the kind of guy who doesn't put up with crap. He calls out people when they're wrong, yells at bad drivers, and uses the word \"dumbass\" very liberally. I should clarify that it's never excessive, violent, or directed at me. I kind of admire his assertiveness sometimes. A lot of people would probably see this as a reasonable level of emotion, but I have some problems dealing with it.\n\nAs I mentioned, I (24) am a doormat. I very, very rarely get angry at anything. My usual response to conflict is to curl up into a ball and cry. I was also physically abused by my father as a kid, because of his anger management issues. When other people are angry, I feel awkward and terrified. I'm working with a therapist to try to get over some of my emotional problems. So far I can successfully deal with anger from/get angry at my sister and my best friend without it being a big deal. With other people, any form of conflict just sits in my mind and scares me.\n\nMy boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months. He knows all about my issues, accepts them, and is always very kind and collected when we're working out minor problems together. But he still gets very angry at other people, and himself. We have similar interests, and I feel more comfortable talking to him than to anyone else. Our relative anger levels just seem incompatible.\n\n I've talked to him about how people getting angry scares me, and he's very understanding of that. I know it's not right to want someone in a relationship to change. I know that's part of who he is and I admire it a bit, but I don't really want to have to become agressive to accept it either. Most of all, I'm terrified of either one of us becoming angry with each other. I know it probably has to happen eventually, and I don't want to get scared and end the relationship.", "summary": "Agression scares me. Boyfriend is on the agressive side. How to productively deal with conflict without getting scared?"}
{"id": "t3_1ihhsn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[23M] with my girlfriend [23F] 7 years, girlfriend has put on a lot of weight", "post": "Over the past few months, my girlfriend has become quite overweight and it's affecting our relationship.\n\nI love her more than anything in the world, but it's affecting our sex life, our social life, and so on and so forth.\n\nShe's aware she's put on weight and has altered her diet, but I know that to see results she needs to exercise. When she's not working (she only works 3 days a week), she lives a sedentary lifestyle. She doesn't go out, she just sits on the sofa.\n\nI've tried to encourage her to run, cycle, and go for walks, but she won't do it.\n\nI used to be overweight, but lost all that weight by exercising daily and eating better, so I know it works...\n\nWhat can I say or do? We've been together seven years and this is the most stressed I've felt in the relationship.", "summary": "Girlfriend has become overweight, it's affecting our relationship. She's eating better, but how do I tell her she needs to exercise too?"}
{"id": "t3_4t9bsj", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "How To Move To New Home W/ Puppy?", "post": "Hi all,\n\nSo, I got a new puppy a bit over a month ago. She's a 13 week chihuahua She's got a great attitude, very friendly, and she's pretty smart. She already knows \"no\", sit, down, shake, \"drop it\", and how to let me know when she needs to go out.\n\nUnfortunately, I am working for the summer (at a pet supply!) and do not have a steady schedule, so I decided not to crate train her. She sleeps with me. She used to wake up a few times at night, but I guess her bladder is more developed and now she wakes up at 6:30 every morning. She knows how to wake me up to take her out. \n\nRight now, when I'm working, I put her into my bathroom. I keep the light and radio on, put in a puppy pad, water, and a frozen kong among 2 or 3 other regular treats to keep her company. I also keep her crate door open so she can get to everything and doesn't feel trapped.\n\nI'm a college student and will be living in an apartment with three other women, one being a friend. I just want to make this move as painless as possible for both of us. I want to know how to make sure she isn't whining while I'm in class (which will be a lot less time than when I was working), so that we don't get complaints and I have to get rid of her. I still would rather not crate train as she's pretty used to her routine sleep with me, but can anyone give advice on this??? I don't think she whines in the bathroom while I'm at work, but my only evidence is that when I come home, she's completely quiet and when I open the bathroom door, she comes running out her crate. \n\nAlso, I'm sharing a bathroom so I will probably not be able to do it in my bathroom, but start leaving her in a portion of my bedroom. She was accidentally left in my bedroom once while I was away and she didn't really destroy anything so that's hopeful.", "summary": "how do I make sure my dog's not whining while I'm away after we move to a new apartment without crate training??"}
{"id": "t3_vgvhf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the best way you have ever received good news?", "post": "My whole family was home one weekend and we were all playing croquet. I went away for a phone call then came back and continued to play. My sister and her husband had been trying to have a child for some time. When it was my turn, I walked up and notice some oddly arranged sticks. Upon closer inspection, I realize the sticks read, \"Baby H.\" Due to my stupidity/randomness, I think nothing of it and turn around. My sister was just standing there staring at me with that, \"Aaaand he's gonna get it in 5..4..3..2..\" and I finally got it. It was a really cool way to find out I was going to be an Uncle. What is the best way someone has delivered good news to you?", "summary": "My sister arranged sticks on the ground to inform me that my brother-in-law had implanted his seed in my sister and I was going to be an Uncle."}
{"id": "t3_1amwdf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I(16f) be just friends with him(17m)?", "post": "We met a month ago and hung out the next weekend with a couple other people. I at the time was into his friend and that's why we hung out. It didn't, however, work out with the friend. \n\nI got over him and a week later I started talking to this guy. We began flirting and went on a date on the 8th. Things really didn't work out with us either. We both really like each other, but there are a lot of complications. He's a virgin and I'm very sexual. Also, I've slept with his friend so that makes things weird. \n\nAfter a bunch of fights and discussing we've decided we should just be friends. That's hard for me though because I'm not sure exactly what kinda friends he wants to be. How do I proceed here?", "summary": "we kinda started heading towards a relationship but it didn't work out for several reasons. Now we've decided to just be friends, but I'm not sure what kinda friendship he wants. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_u6b0n", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "How do I get over an ex-girlfriend of 3 years. *Who hates me now*.", "post": "I dated this girl for three years and we had a good run. Well, she cheated on me three times that I know of, and she would make up these white lies every now and again, which is no problem. But at first she would throw these fits about lying whenever she'd find out I made up a little something (like quitting cigarette smoke). She would also talk to a lot of guys, and I mean a lot. And wouldn't let me have any girlfriends. I was no pushover though, I was just really lenient and didn't mind her going out partying much, and also never made a huge fuss when she would cheat. I would just talk us through it. Anyway, we broke up the last three months we lived together because of a number of problems and I may have told her to drop dead, I don't know. So after a couple months I tried to reconcile, if you will. Now, I try to keep in touch and she feels like I was the worst piece of shit to be spawned to this planet. She ignores my texts, didn't call or send her condolences when I was hospitalized and I still try to keep in touch. How the FUCK do I go about my life and forget this girl ever existed? Because she clearly doesn't care about me and I'm killing myself here.", "summary": "After everything, I did for this girl she ignores me and for some reason acts like I'm the spawn of Satan. How do I move on from this selfish, cheating, lying whore?"}
{"id": "t3_caeo1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Would you be willing to start an internet spawned social/political revolution?", "post": "When the internet began to pick up speed in the days of the 56k modem, I remember fearful talks about how this new technological tool would revolutionize the contemporary era. \n\nOutside of highly accessible porn, mass mp3 theft, and the rise of troll culture I don't really feel that the internet has lived up to its expectations. \n\nI look at the recent financial crisis, the BP oil spill, and the state of the US energy infrastructure at large and I can't help but wonder if the internet will one day provide us will an effective tool to apply collective social pressure to stop these travesties. It feels like a far off utopian ideal. \n\nYet I see places like reddit full of people that at least seem like they care. \n\nIn theory the internet is the ultimate tool for social connection and information exchange. This makes me believe that technological solutions are out there which we simply haven't bothered to enact. \n\nThis then leads me to the thought that maybe if we collectively put our heads together we could either 1) devise a way to apply political pressure from the web or 2) organize to effectively solve glaring social and political problems ourselves (particularly since it is clear that banking and oil interests have a death grip on the current political structure).\n\nThe ultimate obstacle is then motivation to act (hence the title question). \n\nHowever I recognize the possibility that people may not want to put in the effort to change the status quo. There is also a distinct possibility that people enjoy the status quo enough to discourage the risk of change. \n\nHence I ask, \"Would you be willing to start an internet spawned social/political revolution?\"\n\nWhen I ask this I do not want the opinion of \"people\" or \"society at large\". I am wondering how you personally feel about taking on such an endeavor.", "summary": "Would you be willing to put in effort to make the internet a stronger tool for social/political change? (No solutions offered here, just a poll of interest)"}
{"id": "t3_32c2x8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend [25M] gets upset when I [21F] don't spend enough time with him when I see him", "post": "Together for 6 months.  We both live with our parents.\n\nI come over to his place every weekend. My parents are conservative and wouldn't allow me to bring a guy over.  We usually spend the night grabbing or making dinner, watch Netflix, then have sex.\n\nSometimes, however, his sister will be around and I'll chat up with her for a bit.  Meanwhile, bf waits impatiently on his phone looking upset.\n\nOther times, I might get caught up talking with his family.  Or I'd have to do homework.\n\nI'd ask him about it, and he'll say he wanted to spend his weekend hanging out with me instead of waiting on me.  I'd tell him if he can make other plans, he should.  I don't want to get in the way with him spending time with his friends.\n\nStill, he'd say he'd rather spend time with me.\n\nI like him, but I feel like he's starting to get clingy.  We already see each other every day as we have classes together.  I'm thinking of spending less time with him and not coming over as often.", "summary": "Boyfriend gets upset whenever I come over and don't spend enough time with him.  We already see each other almost every day and I come over every weekend.  What do?"}
{"id": "t3_2dritb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How to get over the fact I [m/22] think I'm going to lose my best friends [m/22] and [f/21]", "post": "So basically my two best friends are a couple. I however knew the guy a year before the girl. Eventually the girl found her way into our group of friends and became close with all of us for about a year before she started dating the guy. 2 years later they're still dating and the group fell apart for the most part except for us 3.\n\nThey really are great people and never make me feel like a third wheel (probably because I was friends with both prior to dating) and over the last 5 months we got real close I feel. They both helped with with a huge medical scare (I suffer from Crohns) with the female friend always being there to talk and even go with me to the hospital. I have also helped them both out and I know they have told me things that I doubt anyone else knows. We are all very open.\n\nThe problem is they will be moving back away for school 40 mins away. And this upsets me greatly. Since April we have all hung out probably 2-3 times a week every week and even went on vacation together with a few other friends. I feel like the shift now to seeing eachother maybe once a month is going to kill our relationship. I'm worried maybe I'll be replaced by their new roommates or something. That we will slowly drift apart.\n\nI've expressed this concern of wanting to stay in touch and how i'm worried it wont be like that. They have both said they will prove me wrong.\n\nAny ideas how I can get over this?", "summary": "Bestfriends are moving back to school 40 mins away. Going to go from seeing them 2-3 times a week to maybe 1 time per month. Worried I'll be replaced or forgotten about."}
{"id": "t3_gw2d1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My husband's nephew has aspergers, his parents won't get him diagnosed or get him help. What to do?", "post": "The kid is 18 years old, about to graduate high school and is going to a decent university in the fall. He's really smart but utterly socially inept. The boy has aspergers, everyone knows it, but he is not professionally diagnosed. The parents think if the son knows he's aspie, he'll feel stigmatized or it will ruin his college/goals if he knows. The kid has never had friends, has problems with girl obsessions & not taking cues that girls think he's odd/aren't interested and is starting to look like a stalker. I'm afraid he'll not understand his actions and do something not socially acceptable. \n\nI think knowing would help him tremendously. He could understand why everyone is repelled by him, learn some life skills and possibly have a shot at a more normal future. I'm afraid he'll get to college and get so wrapped up in social issues, figuring out how to dress/feed himself, etc. he'll end up depressed, overwhelmed and ultimately fail.\n\nThe parents don't want to hear suggestions at this point. Anything I can/should do?", "summary": "Nephew has undiagnosed asperger's & his parents won't get him a diagnosis or help. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_1ovft9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my GF [19 F] over 2 years, I'm thinking about taking a break", "post": "We've been together over two years, I am a 20M in my third year of college, she's a 19F in her first year. She has been saying that I am distancing myself because of my job (I am an RA at my college, and she goes to a different college). While that may be true, I have a job to do, and I can't spend my time worrying about myself and taking on her tribulations (she's having a hard time making friends at school and uses me as a \"safe harbor\" to avoid her school and potentially new friends, which is a problem considering if I cut her off, she will have nearly no social life). I think if we both take some time for ourselves (a year or two), then we can get rid of all of this stress, and if it's meant to be then we'll get back together.\n\nIs a split-up the best plan? I've been thinking about this a lot and that's the best option I've come up with, which is unfortunate.", "summary": "she and I are both stressed from school and work, I think we need some time off to worry about ourselves and not about each other."}
{"id": "t3_2prb6p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Ex (42M) of 2.5 yrs broke \"no contact rule\" and made me (27F) a financial offer he knows I can't refuse", "post": "A bit over a week ago my ex and I broke up. He is very business savy and wealthy. \n\nWe had lived together for a full 3 weeks, but being with a traveling business man is not easy, and he felt pressured into commitment. He being 42 told me I was not right to be his future wife, so he kicked me out. I am in my late 20s and very much in love with him. \n\nHe is cold but showed his love in the form of helping my company get off the ground. He invested time and money getting things set up for me. Suddenly he wants me gone but still hopes to participate in my business ventures. I begin no contact and he is shocked. I admit I stalked his facebook, he was depressed up until yesterday. Today I launched my online store and made a Tinder account (I found him there a week ago). Today he emails me a very business-like email saying how it's stupid talking through assistants when he could just contact me about my business plan. He offers all the financial and business help he knows I need. \n\nA part of me knows it's because he wants in on my future business (it's fucking genius) a part of me hopes it's because he hates waking up alone and being completely alone. He was incredibly depressed the last few weeks we were together. I was worried and asked him to get psych help. Now he's throwing money at the situation, asking for nothing in return. He knew I needed a couple of thousand for a lawyer, a bit more for merchandise, etc. He writes a detailed pricing email explaining me my business model but says he wants nothing more than my success and maybe a bit of his initial investment. \n\nI'm lost without him both emotionally and business-wise but somehow could make it work without him(loan from family), although not as well as he ever could, not a marketer at all. He knows this. Right now there is nothing tying me to him, except my feelings and need for business help. What to do?", "summary": "my ex is smart, wealthy, and offers me something I can't refuse but is not offering a relationship, nor is he saying I'm sorry for kicking me out of his life :("}
{"id": "t3_1m0lpw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend[23/M] group-hanging out with party girl [23/F]... Reasonable to be bothered or not? [5 year relationship]", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. Everything is 90% good. \n\nHe hangs out with his 4 male friends on a regular basis to play a game that I don't like playing, so I never come. At times, those males bring their girlfriends or just female friends along, and it's always been fine with me.\n\nNow, however, a girl [23/f] \"Trisha\" is interested in becoming a regular part of their hangouts. The hangouts would be 4 guys (including my boyfriend) and now her. I barely know her, but from what I've seen of her on Facebook, she (based on the pictures):\n\n1. drinks a lot and flaunts it\n\n2. has stripped to her bra and underwear before with my boyfriend's friends\n\n3. grabs her boobs (through clothes) and holds them up for camera at a party environment \n\n4. stands on table while doing similar obnoxious behavior\n\nSoo... I don't think my boyfriend would cheat on me, but it makes me uncomfortable to imagine her becoming a regular part of their group. I also feel like it's almost disrespectful for him to be around someone like that on a regular basis. I've told him that it makes me uncomfortable, but he (he has had more social interaction with her than I have, but still pretty limited) says that those pictures are just pictures and don't represent who she really is. And that she is \"just one of the guys\" and not to worry about it.\n\nBut here I am, worrying and writing about it on Reddit. Is it unreasonable for me to be bothered by this girl becoming a regular part of their hangouts? And how wrong would it be for me to request that my boyfriend does not hang out with her, or significantly limits it, rather than having regular hangouts with her involved?", "summary": "Boyfriend[23/M] group-hanging out with party girl [23/F]. Not sure what is a reasonable reaction here.... Him and I have been in a relationship for 5 years."}
{"id": "t3_2a2j28", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/m] My girlfriend [20/f] has become very distant and weird", "post": "I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for a little bit over 1 year. We recently had a breakup because I was distant and she thought I was cheating on her (which I wasn't). Before the breakup, she wanted to spend as much time with me as she could, but recently she has been very distant. We used to go to eachothers places overnight almost daily, but nowadays she does not want to come over to my place or want me to go over to hers (We both live on our own). She also used to talk to me all the time on facebook, but now she pretty much only replies to what I talk, and does not try to keep the conversation going. She has became pretty slow at replying, but when I'm with her, she replies instantly to her other friends who text her. \n\nI'm really lost at this situation, because I feel like she does not want to be with me anymore. I know that she's taking SSRI medications at the moment for anxiety. But she was taking them before we broke up for couple weeks. Her explanation for this situation is that she wants to spend some time alone, because she is working so much and never has time to be alone. This bothers me because she used to want to be with me all the time she could, and now she does not even try to schedule time for me.", "summary": "gf has became very distant after we got back together, even though before we  broke up she was really into me."}
{"id": "t3_uni3e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He ignored a comment I made about claiming the boyfriend title.  Where do I go from here?", "post": "I'm a 25 female, dating a 23 male.  We live in the eastern United States, I'm attending grad school, he's attending law school.  We've been dating for 3 months now and have been exclusive for the past month and a half or so.  At this point we don't call each other boyfriend or girlfriend, but he does stay over every couple weeks and I've stayed over his place on multiple occasions.  He's very affectionate in person and in his text messages, he opens car doors for me, we hold hands in public, kiss etc.  I have only met one of his friends, but he's shown my picture to a couple of his gfs.\n\nAnyways to get to the question.  He was asking me what I was doing and I told him I was listening to my friend tell me how she was FB stalking our high school classmates who had hot boyfriends.  And he said \"so she's stalking you? haha jk\" I said \"to answer you, yes :)\" and then \"does that mean you're claiming the boyfriend title haha?\"\n\nHe completely ignored that boyfriend text and moved on with the conversation.  I haven't brought it up again, and don't plan to anytime soon.  I'm assuming this means he's not ready to claim the boyfriend title.  But how do I bring it up again without making him feel like I'm some pushy, clingy girl? By the six month mark I'd like to be considered his GF because otherwise I'd feel like the relationship isn't moving forward.  For me the boyfriend/girlfriend title wouldn't change our relationship, it would just reinforce my confidence in our relationship.  I'm not going to worry about it for now, but would just like some advice as to how to broach the subject again if necessary and/or why he's not ready to claim the boyfriend title (myriad of possibilities I know).", "summary": "Ignored a comment asking him if he was claiming the boyfriend title, how and when should I bring up the topic again if necessary?"}
{"id": "t3_kkyww", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, how can my brass choir raise money to travel to Albania and help grow their music education?", "post": "As the title says, I need help coming up with ideas/resources on how to raise enough money for a twenty-student brass band to travel to Albania/Greece. The trip is going to cost about $3,000 a piece, and most of us poor students just don't have the cash for that. Any info on corporate donations or huge fundraising ideas would be great. \n\nBack Story: Last year, one of the trumpet teachers (who is a good friend of my trumpet professor) came to my school in order to study with professors in America and expand his knowledge. He teaches at the only conservatory in Albania, The Albanian University of Arts. Even though he is a great player, there are so many things that he just doesn't have access to. This includes all the different teaching methods and equipment. For instance, he was in an opera over there, but the trumpet he had when he came here would have been considered a \"beginner's\" model here in the states. He was fortunately able to purchase a new one with the grant he received. He is also now the first person in Albania to own a piccolo trumpet, which is a standard thing for performers here. I can't explain how cool this is!! \n\nNow that he is back in Albania, he is begging our brass choir to go over and visit. Doing this would propel their brass program forward, as they don't have access to the quality of players that we have. It would also give the students over there a chance to interact with American students, which would be very beneficial to them (as well as us).\n\nIn addition to working with the school, we plan on giving concerts at the embassies as well as around Albania/Greece.", "summary": "I need to know how I can raise money so our university Brass Choir can go to Albania in order help improve the education of their brass musicians."}
{"id": "t3_27oh2a", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going to McDonald's.", "post": "Gross story on both ends, btw.\n\nI have apparently contracted some sort of stomach virus, and as such, am sick as a dog.\n\nWhen I'm sick, I don't really care what I eat, because it's going to come shooting out of one end or another.\n\nI get there at 12:00.\n\nIf it matters, I used to work there, but haven't for two years. (Thank the fucking lord because I swear to Christ if I would have had to spend one more day there I would have probably gone more insane than five and a half years of working there had already made me). I did not know the name of the employee who I interacted with. Another side note: when I worked there, if you didn't wear your nametag it was an insta-writeup).\n\nI got sidetracked, sorry. So I went into McD's and waited for six minutes. apparently they're short staffed. This part, I understand. but what I don't understand, and found quite disgusting, was displaying a bleeding arm, explaining that they were bleeding, and cleaning with the same type of rag used to clean the tables. What I don't understand, also, is trying to get me to come back when I've said \"never mind\" and am dashing out of the store on the verge of puking.", "summary": "Montezuma's revenge finally relented for a split second, long enough for me to get food.  Hurricane Nausea set in and I turned into Sonic the Hedgehog to get the hell out."}
{"id": "t3_2iob6z", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by ordering toys", "post": "So I just realized this happened and I may or may not be royally screwed.\n\nBit of backstory, I live on campus at a university near an hour away from home. Parents said they were leaving out of town this Thursday, and I, as the typical horny college guy, tell my SO to come over for the weekend and we can have a great time. I've been planning stuff I was going to do and running the gist of it by the SO and she was ecstatic. All I needed now was to buy the toys, lube, and more toys! \n\nOf course I go to trusty Amazon and order it all there, one problem though. I ordered it and thought all was good, order says delivered, check my post at the school, says no package. I thought that was weird, and I immediately got scared. I checked Amazon and I realized I ordered it all to my house, and not my dorm. Somehow my dumb ass put the dorm address on the billing address instead of shipping. My parents don't leave until Friday afternoon and I'm dreading seeing them now, because I know they always open all my packages and letters.", "summary": "Ordered super happy adult fun time stuff, shipped it all to parents house and they've probably already opened and seen it all."}
{"id": "t3_2s69od", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] new girlfriend [24F] of two months is showing some signs of being 'clingy'. How to bring it up without hurting feelings?", "post": "To start off, she has a lot of amazing qualities and I deeply enjoy the time we spend together. I like her, but at this point, I am just trying to feel out the relationship and kind of see where it goes. On the other hand, she seems to really love me already. She wants to see me all the time, talks about how her parents will really like me, is planning vacations with me for the next summer, just got me an expensive holiday gift, etc. Apart from her many positive qualities, I find this very unattractive. I need to have a conversation with her about our expectations for the relationship and that I would really like to slow down and just take time to enjoy each other. I'm worried that my lack of such a fast commitment will leave her feeling led on. What's a way to approach that would allow me to express myself effectively, while also not making her feel like I don't care or that she is unwanted (because I do want her)", "summary": "My new lovely gf is moving too fast for me and I find it clingy. How to bring it up without ruining everything?"}
{"id": "t3_qcw9v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend wants to see the world, I do not. Are we incompatible?", "post": "I'm 25, UK have done a lot of travelling in my younger years (i.e pre18). She's 22, we've dated 1yr and a half, lived together for 4 or 5 months before she finished her Uni/Work placement and decided she wanted to travel. She's gone to Oz for 6months or so and I didn't want to give up my well paid job to go with her, just to come back to unemployment\n\nThe problem is that she doesn't know if she ever wants to stop travelling. I always planned to move to wherever she was when her career finally kicked off (I can work anywhere) but she can't say when that will be. In a way she feels bad for making me wait. She knows I want to settle down and have kids, and shes getting the \"I'm young and only have one chance to see everything in the world\" out of her system\n\nI cant conceive of any situation where the two of us would break up, and we both love each other a substantial amount, so I guess my question is: do you think this is a situation that can work out? Will the strain and guilt pile on for her the longer she's away and I'm waiting at home? Will some sort of resentment grow for each other because neither of us have said no to our dreams (hers to travel, mine for family) to be with each other from now on?", "summary": "She wants to see the world, I want to get a house and family. Can we stay together while shes away travelling for an indeterminate time without resentment growing for each other?"}
{"id": "t3_1hoyov", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Please help force me to leave her. Me[31M] with my wife [32F] of 13 years and a kid, she cheated again and I need to get divorced, but I just can't.", "post": "She says it'll never happen again. But she said that last time too.  This last year has been good. We've been relatively happy. Going to therapy and taking her meds. She's bi-polar.\n\nI went out of state to visit family. She was hanging out with friends, including the guy she cheated on me with a year and a half ago. He gave her his #. She called him, then went to his house, (just to hang out as friends), and they had sex. A few times during the week. \n\nWhen I got back I knew something was up. She was being extra nice and we actually had good sex, which was unusual. I attributed it to her missing me, but... I checked her phone and found that she had been calling someone. We made a therapy appointment the next day to clear the air. Her therapist and her weren't going to tell me what she did, but I figured it out and called her on it. She didn't deny it, so I threw my wedding ring and walk out saying it's over, that's after she begged me not to leave her. \"Please don't leave me. I love you. Please don't leave me.\" \n\n She said it happened because she's a messed up person. That she's an idiot. \n\nBut my willpower just left me and now I don't want to get divorced. We have a house together, a daughter, we're just started to get ahead on finances. The logical part of my brain knows I'll be happier with out her.  But the other part of brain knows it wants to stay with her. I feel like I have no pride, no self-respect. We grew up together, half our lives. I have no clue life will be like with out her. \n\nOn the other hand. I don't want my life to change. If she does do the right things in the future, can't we be happy again?", "summary": "She cheated on me again and I said we were done with, but I still can't leave her. I texted last night that I wanted to work things out."}
{"id": "t3_1advni", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Not sure what to do in this situation. Would love some help from Reddit.", "post": "Hi reddit. I'm a 20 years old male and I would love some advice, I'm sorry if this is the wrong subreddit to post this.\n\nI will start out with the background info.\nI recently got out of a long relationship and the reason it fell apart basiclly was that there was a rumor that said I hooked up with one of my closest friends which is a girl lets call her Emma. This never happend, both Emma and I  got a lot of shit because of it in both our reletionships. My relationship failed when my GF was deadset that this rumor was the truth and cheated on me because of it as a sort of payback. I can not deny that there is a attraction between Emma and me, but we have never acted on it. Emma just got out her relationship aswell because she got tired of her BF being a douche about this rumor. \n\nThe problem\nEmma and I always sort of hanged out with other friends when we both had a partner. But I got a text from Emma tonight asking if we should hang out just the two of us tomorrow night playing video games, watching movies and drink some. This will propbably lead to us hooking up and I would not be far out by saying it will probably lead to sex aswell. I would also not be far out by saying this will lead us to becoming fuck friends aswell. While I can honstley say that I have fantasized about having sex with her, now that the opportunity has presented itself I'm not sure what to do. \nOne part of me wants to have sex with her and see how it is since it ruined my relationship and I wouldn't mind having her as a fuck friend(she is smoking hot). But another part of me wonders if this will make it akward to stay friends, I really treasure her as one of my best friends and I really don't want to lose her as my friend because of this. \n\nAnd that is my problem Reddit, what do you guys think I should do?", "summary": "I'm afraid of losing a friend by becoming fuck friends with her, yet I want to have sex with her to see how it is to have it. What to do in this situation Reddit?"}
{"id": "t3_2njo0b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23f] am severely depressed and don't think my illness is fair to my boyfriend [25m].", "post": "My boyfriend doesn't have a perfect life but he is doing well. He has a great paying job to cover his own expenses, and has life ambitions. He has finished university.\n\nMe, I am in university. I am doing an internship right now that has been abysmal. My mental health has been a trainwreck. I am severely depressed. I have realized, working 9-5, that this is NOOOOOOOOOT for me. This lifestyle is not for me. These jobs are not for me. I am soooo soooo soooooo unhappy with how I am living. I have an office admin internship right now and I absolutely despise it. My degree (a business degree) is really not equipped for other types of work.\n\nMy boyfriend wants\n\na) kids\n\nb) to travel\n\nc) to buy our own home.\n\nI do not think I can provide him these things. In my future, I see under or un-employment. I think at best, I will work part time in a position. My depression probably isn't the only reason I am hating work. It's NOT for my personality. He wants us to have enough money to afford a home, kids, travel......\n\nAnd I can tell you that I probably will never earn enough money to have these things. His salary can't support both of us + kids, and I DO NOT expect him to pay my way thru life.\n\nI am very sad. I think he deserves better. someone he can have these things with.\n\nWe've been together 6 years. I love him to death. He loves me. But I am so depressed (and out of options; tried therapy...failed. Tried therapy AGAIN...failed. Tried meds. Not really helping. Do not have enough money for specialist psychologists or anything else). \n\nI think he is better off without me.\n\nWhat should I do? Set him free so he can pursue this life he wants?", "summary": "I am depressed. I am very unwell, and have been unwell for 10+ years. My partner wants a great life and i do not think I will EVER be in the financial shape to help him achieve this goal."}
{"id": "t3_r3dzo", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help me Reddi-wan Kenobi, you're my only hope :(", "post": "Ok, so in the grand scheme of things this may seem like a rather insignificant little problem, but its the most troubling thing for me in my life at the moment apart from my studies. \nSo I'm in high school, 11th grade, a sophomore basically (not sure if sophomore or senior, Aussie here) and I have a girlfriend. Yeah, I know, how silly of me. The thing is, I really like this girl, but she seems to be way more into this relationship than I am. I am considering breaking up with her but then it would be so awkward for both of us as we are in the same class together for Biology and do our experiments and what-not together. She is also very emotionally unstable at this point, very conscious of her weight, has been known to cut herself and doesnt have a very good relationship with her parents. Anybody who is or has been in a similar situation please, you're my only hope.", "summary": "I have a sort of psycho girlfriend who I dont really fancy as a partner anymore. How do I go about breaking up in the least harmful way?"}
{"id": "t3_1iwhoy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[23M] after breaking up with my girlfriend [25F] of half a year had realization, are relationships a mix of 'freedom vs security' or 'freedom vs responsibility'?", "post": "I've been having a relationship with a girl for nearly half a year and we recently decided to break it off. After not being in a relationship much since high school, and having many casual hookups, I rushed into a relationship after a life changing event. I was surprised and shocked as I discovered how similar we were, but didn't really know what I wanted in a relationship. I guess after being single for so long, you realize you have a great deal of freedom. Freedom to do whatever you want without any real repercussions other than your own guilt. But when you're in a relationship, you trade that freedom to do anything with the security of having another person to confide in, to hold against the darkness of the universe. I guess I felt like I was losing my identity as I precipitated from a 'me' mentality to a 'we' mentality. Perhaps the 'me' mentality is a symptom of being a young adult, and at some point you realize that security is more important as you age and experience the world, but you have to want to make the transition. I feel like I lost her because I wasn't able to meet my responsibilities for the 'we' part, and I wasn't always there when she needed me. \n\nI guess my question is two parts. How do you reconcile the loss of your self identity to meet it in the middle with your mutual other? \n\nThen also, is the 'freedom vs security' a valid way to look at modern day relationships? It's really 1 person vs 2 people, which is the stronger model? Also, is security interchangeable with responsibility because you have to be responsible in order to gain the benefits of security? This kind of matches the constant struggle in the political spectrum where we try to pick a perfect balance between freedom (doing whatever you want) vs security (being safer) or responsibility (standing up for what you think is right despite what may feel good).  I mean, are there any abstract examples or ideas out there that very closely match the balance of a good relationship?", "summary": "After a breakup, trying to see what I can learn from the experience as it relates to the classic political dilemma of 'freedom vs responsibility/security'"}
{"id": "t3_2lwyde", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by telling my pregnant wife I wouldn't cheat on her.", "post": "This basically happened... oh... ten minutes ago or so.\n\nMy wife is 9 weeks pregnant and well into the morning sickness, sick headaches, hormonal/emotional mess that the first trimester brings. Her self-esteem has taken a hit and her nerves are pretty frayed because she basically feels like ass 24/7. Her nausea usually hits her the worst in the afternoons and evenings, so today after work, she decided to lay down in bed and read until I got home from work about an hour later. When I got home, I crawled into bed with her and we started cuddling and chatting about our days.\n\nNow, sexy time usually happens in the evenings or before we go to bed, but the last month or so, my wife has felt so crappy in the evenings that she usually just passes the fuck out as soon as she hits the pillow. Being the understanding husband I am, I of course let sleeping pregnant ladies lie and let her get her much needed rest. Growing a person is hard work apparently! She has expressed regret, though, that we haven't had sex in awhile and today was no different. As we were cuddling in bed, she apologized again that we haven't had sex in awhile and said she wished she was feeling better so she could, and she said this in a joking tone, \"attend to her wifely duties.\" \n\nI kissed her on the cheek and, in the same joking tone, said, \"Don't worry. I won't cheat on you.\"\n\nShe looked at me with complete horror and kind of choked out, \"Wh-why would you even say that? Are you? Omigod, are you cheating on me?\" Cue the crying and sobbing and blubbering. She kept repeating, \"I wouldn't blame you. I'm gross and fat and ugly. I haven't felt good enough for sex. I would understand. I wouldn't blame you.\"\n\nI of course started apologizing profusely. I have never apologized so much in my life. She finally just said, \"Okay. Okay,\" a few times and quit crying. But she asked to be alone for a while. \n\nReddit. I fucked up.", "summary": "Told my sick, emotionally strained, pregnant wife I wouldn't cheat on her after she apologized for lack of sexy time. Cuddling to crying in 0.5 secs."}
{"id": "t3_35ltqd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [20 F] of 14 months. I can't figure out a solid reason why I should stay in (or break up) this relationship!", "post": "My girlfriend is kind, loving, sweet, really hot etc and tells me she loves me all the time, but I can't shake the feeling that she's not the one. I know I'm young and so is she, and being my first girlfriend this is probably a pretty generic case. I don't know why I feel this way which is why the prospect of breaking up is so hard, I'd want to give her a reason other than \"I just don't feel the same\"!\n\nOne thing that does bug me is the fact that she says she loves me SO much, like, at least 2-3 times an hour when we're together. I feel like she doesn't trust that I'll say it back? I also feel sometimes that she wants to keep me for the company, as she doesn't have many friends (she wouldn't have any trouble getting any if she put herself out there a bit more) of her own and is often alone in her flat. I, on the other hand have no problems being by myself for a length of time. \n\nOh, and I'm moving to Sydney for 5 months in 8 weeks or so.\n\nI feel like I'm answering some of my own questions simply by typing my thoughts out here, but I'd much appreciate other people's opinions.\n\nThanks in advance.", "summary": "I am much more independent than my S/O and feel as though she is fooling herself into loving me because she is scared of being on her own."}
{"id": "t3_35yyav", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I'm confused and I feel violated, help?", "post": "A bit of background: I (f) am in a long term relationship with some I love more than I ever thought I could. I've recently had to change up my friend groups as well for various reasons. Anyway, I went to the pub with a few new friends last night and we all got very drunk and had a good time. We went back to a friends house where I ended up falling asleep. The problem: I went to bed alone (he has a spare bedroom which he let me use because I lived half an hour away from him) but in the middle of the night I woke up being in between two of my male friends. We were fully clothed so I just assumed they would rather share a bed than just sleep on the floor, which didn't bother me, but the friend behind me was touching me in very private places (he didn't go under clothing though). I could hear him whispering things to himself and it was very obvious he was horny. I felt very uncomfortable about this and panicked so I pretended that I was still sleeping. This probably lasted for about an hour and even if I moved to try and get him off of me he would just pull me back.\nWhat I'm asking now is, what do I do? I didn't confront him about it this morning and I also haven't told my partner. I also feel like if i say anything i am going to cause a rift in the friend group which i really don't want to do. I'm confused and quite stressed by what's happened so any advice would be appreciated", "summary": "I was touched up whilst sleeping by a friend even though I'm in a serious relationship, what do I do now? Also, my friends all know that I am in a relationship."}
{"id": "t3_mb2v5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help; My uncle has been missing abroad for 20 years. How could I look for him?", "post": "Hello, Reddit.\n\nHere goes\u2026 My dad's brother left Europe to work in Australia in 1978, long before I was born. During the time he was in his early 20's. My dad and the rest of the brothers escorted him to the airport, watched him take off and never heard from him again\u2026\n\nLater on my relatives have tried to search for him in different ways \u2013 through Australian authorities, other relatives living in Australia, Red Cross, etc. without success. We know he got to Australia. We know he had a job waiting there. Other than that, the authorities at least won't tell anything. All we're left are the immigration selection documents and a bunch of photos taken at the airport.\n\nI gather there are two possible scenarios; a) he somehow died and went missing or b) he went missing willingly and had kept under the radar. Nobody knows why he would've done such a thing, though. Others think the authorities would've told had he died. It's been a long time since and we understand there's good change he's passed away but many of us still stay positive. The 70's were a lot different time and you probably could've disappeared if you wanted to.\n\nNow, I know the internet is a powerful tool and at this point, I turn to you and your advice. How would one use the internet to look for him? I don't think creating a Facebook page would do squat but I don't really know where to look from\u2026 Please help.", "summary": "Uncle travelled to Australia for work in 1978, went missing. How could I look for him via internet, or otherwise?"}
{"id": "t3_z0aqt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Need help diagnosing a medical issue I've been having", "post": "Ok soooo... where to begin?  A little over a year ago I started experimenting with \"K2\", or synthetic marijuana basically, and started experiencing some very odd things.  A few months after basically daily use I started to have some issues with my stomach where I couldn't eat.  I would get hungry but have an overwhelming feeling of nausea at the same time to make me want to not eat.  It got to the point where I almost didn't eat for a month and a half straight.  I haven't used the substance for a year now but the problem has been persisting for about a year as well, having periods of ups and downs where I'll suddenly be able to eat and then the next meal get insanely sick again.  I've lost almost 50 lbs. now (172 pounds down to 127 at the moment) and I see no end in sight to what I'm going through and quite frankly I'm starting to worry.  I haven't gone to a doctor because I have no health insurance and I have a minor phobia of doctors to begin with, and I guess a part of me is a little scared I'll find out it's something really bad and really expensive.  So if there are any doctors, nurses, paramedics, anyone who can possibly help me narrow down what's going on with me and a way to fix it I'd be in your debt.  Any questions I'll try to answer.", "summary": "I started smoking K2 and started having constant nausea after eating that has been persisting over a year and have lost 50 lbs.  Asking anyone for help"}
{"id": "t3_3gnsg3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [26 F] seeing a guy [28M] who's treated me better than anyone I've ever dated, but he just wants something casual in spite of if feeling v serious. Do I let him go?", "post": "I met this lovely guy on tinder (I know, questionable origins) and he's treated me better than anyone I've ever been with. From our very first date he said he was only in the market for casual however, so I've been understandably weary. But regardless of our casual status, we see each other weekly, have Scrabble nights, pig out and watch Netflix... Plus he invited me to his brother's wedding and asked me to go away for the weekend with him, among other very coupley things. Plus he's just so nice to me, always telling me I'm pretty, plus he seems to find my daftness charming (I'm not used to this).\n\nAnyway, in spite of it all, he doesn't want to commit, and he's still on tinder. Apparently he used to be pretty overweight and has had really long dry spells, so he says he wants to make up for lost time. We've only been dating 2 months, but I can feel myself becoming attached. I don't want to let him go though, because he gives me everything I need (beside the title of girlfriend) and I'm scared I won't find another guy as nice as him. I've been with quite a few dudes, and at this point in the relationship they usually fade on me or start to treat me like shit. \n\nI'm just not sure if I should let him go because we want different things at the moment, or if I should stick it out for a little while longer and see if he changes his mind, since it genuinely feels as if he really likes me. Any advice/anecdotes would be greatly welcomed :)", "summary": "I'm seeing a guy who I really like and he treats me extremely well and it feels pretty serious, but he maintains he wants something casual. Should I end things or see where they go?"}
{"id": "t3_s2qud", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's the scariest interaction you've had with a stranger? I was chased through the desert..", "post": "In January 2007, my wife (then girlfriend), best friend and I drove 2,000 miles to attend a playoff game in San Diego. Along the California border, I had the bright idea to take a side road between Interstate 10 and Interstate 8 to save time. It was about 3 in the morning and there were no cars within miles on either side of me when all of a sudden I see a car come speeding up with its left turn light blinking. I slowed down to let it pass but instead the driver started creeping up to my bumper and refusing to pass. No big deal, waited for a passable zone and slowed down to allow him to pass. By now, I'm going about 25 in a 60 and he is still riding my bumper. Freaked out a little bit, I sped up to 85, he's still on my ass. We're hauling ass through the Imperial Sand Dunes Rec area when all of a sudden another car comes up with its emergency lights flashing. The car that had initially followed me now started trying to box me in on the left side and run me off the road. I kept swerving back and forth to make it really difficult.\nAs I neared the town of Brawley, I decided I had to make a move. I slammed the brakes with both cars right on me, they swerved and stopped about 50 feet in front of me, just sitting there. I sat in the middle of the road facing either direction while they watched us for about 10 minutes. Finally they started to pull off, unfortunately I still had to go in that direction so I floored it to about 100 to avoid an ambush. The adrenaline rush got us all the way to San Diego in the wee morning hours. I was scared shitless, there are other stories but this is the one that takes the cake. What's the scariest interaction you've had with a stranger?", "summary": "I was chased through the desert by cars trying to run me off the road with my pregnant girlfriend. It was scary."}
{"id": "t3_51l64i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my ___ [18F] duration, short-description", "post": "last summer i fell in love for the first time with my girlfriend, i wanted to marry her, I still love her, shes the kindest person on earth, she cared so much for me like no other person, but there were ups and downs, i didnt like her dressing sense, she put up with me for a while, then suddenly she said i dont love you anymore, I said id do anything she asked me, even dresses which i had a concern for, but she doesnt want a relationship anymore, she said she lost love.\n\ni told her ill change all she wants, but she doesnt want me, the thing is we've cuddled and did things and i can't do that to anyone in my life than her, im so obsessed with her, i Love her so much more than anything in this world, All i want is a life with her, shes my life.\n\n Is it even possible to get someone back who doesn't love you anymore? I've vommited 6 times over this break up, i've cried, my education and life is getting affcted, when she talks i feel like im in heaven, My friend says once a girl hates a guy she'll never like him again... Is that true, i've tried suiciding 3 times but i still have faith in her, i just want her back, idc if she loves me or not, she moves my world night and day, I miss her :(", "summary": "How do i get back someone i've been with over a year who just broke up? what's the best way, do i give them space?"}
{"id": "t3_xd3td", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Housemate leaves used tampons in toilet and is a nasty b*tch - please help?", "post": "this is a throw away account because my house mate is pretty cray cray.  We are both 26/f\n\nA little while ago I found a used tampon in our toilet bowl and confronted my housemate about it [(see first post)]  \n\nAfter the wonderful words of redditors I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt - maybe it a was mistake - even though in my other confrontations with her she's been a total nasty b*tch - so I had a feeling this was done out of spite but I didnt say anything.\n\nToday I woke up to find yet another used, bloody, nasty tampon in our bowl.  Flipping gross.  I texted her \"I need you to flush your tampons if you are going to put them in the toilet bowl\" (we have been having drain issues because she is flushing her nasty tampons and she refuses to stop).  \n\nShe replied, \"Oh I must have not pushed the handle down hard enough\" - the lid was up when I walked into the bathroom so I'm not buying that bogus line.\n\nI wrote back, \"Thanks in advance for making sure that does not happen again.\"  to drive home the point that I'm serious.\n\nCame home today and she 1.  didn't apologize for subjecting me to her nastyness and 2. refuses to talk to me and is blasting her music (ie sending the non verbal message I'm pissed).  I dont really care about our friendship that much (anyone who doesnt own up to leaving their used sanitary napkins in the toilet of a shared bathroom isn't a person I need to have a long term friendship with) but I do care about my standard of living.\n\nheres my question:\n1 - Can I somehow make this gross behavior stop so I don't have to see her used tampons anymore?\n2 - if she retaliates (which I have a feeling she will...she's pretty passive aggressive) with something worse - how do I protect myself?  What if she starts leaving her poo in the bowl or leaving something else gross around the house?", "summary": "living with passive agressive gross housemate that leaves her used tampons in the bowl and when I confront her she gets pissed at me.  How do I protect myself from her bad behavior?"}
{"id": "t3_4us8k2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with my friend [30F] of about a year, her relationship is unhealthy and I'm not sure what to do.", "post": "I [25F] met my friend [30F] last year, and quickly realized that her relationship that I assumed was healthy (we have mutual friends) is really codependent and toxic. She acknowledges that she's a shell of her former self, he verbally abuses her, manipulates her in weird/unhealhthy ways, and has isolated her from all of her friends. A few of our mutual friends think it is abusive.\n\nI was really happy to be friends with her, until her drunken boyfriend lashed out at me for no reason. He randomly started telling me I was a worthless person. I'm sure he was just jealous she had a friend. I managed to be patient with the scenario since I wanted her to have support, but eventually I was too blunt about my disapproval which upset her, and our relationship kind of faded out.\n\nI'm not sure what to do. I valued her as a friend, and at the least would like to be supportive. But I think her boyfriend is an abusive asshole. I don't want to hang out with someone who would personally insult me, and I don't really want to talk about him either. We haven't talked for a few months, I'm not sure how to start things again.", "summary": "Friend is in unhealthy relationship. Not sure how to be supportive but also avoid her abusive jerk of a boyfriend, so we haven't talked in months. How can I help her?"}
{"id": "t3_q66u9", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Can the cops throw me in jail without giving me medical attention after a car accident?", "post": "Last week I was in a car accident on a snowy evening.  It was dark and the road was horrible, and I managed to rear-end another driver.\nI don't really remember much of what happened after that since I smashed my head on my steering wheel and the air bags didn't deploy.\n\nSo the cops arrive on scene and decide I'm drunk, taking me straight to the station and then to jail.  I only blew a .06, which is under the legal limit.  My lawyer told me that they shouldn't have even put me in jail or set my bail at $5000 in this situation, but he also said that they were under no legal obligation to call me an ambulance or take me to a hospital despite the fact that I had sustained a head injury.\n\nI had to be bailed out and then taken to the ER, the cops were just going to leave me in jail.\n\nI wanted to get a second opinion since that seems just plain wrong to me.", "summary": "I got in a car accident, blew a .06, cops threw me in jail without medical attention despite the fact that I was injured."}
{"id": "t3_2dr66s", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [29/f] and my girlfriend [29/f] and I can't tell anyone we're together", "post": "Okay, this may take some explaining but please bear with me, I could really use some solid advice.\n\nMy girlfriend and I have been together since we were in school. In fact we're celebrating our 14th anniversary this year, and we couldn't be happier with each other.  We're just as in love now as we were when we first got together.\n\nThe problem is that everything in those 14 years has been a complete secret from everyone we know.\nWhen we first got together I told me mother I was bisexual and she hit the roof.  In all other respects she's an amazing parent and I love her very much, but she absolutely forbid me to do this.  So, we kept our relationship a secret, neither of us really expecting it to last forever.\n\nWhen I left school I suffered a medical issue that has left me disabled and stranded at home with my mother (who has cared for me amazingly). I'm without the means to get a job or support myself properly.  Because my mum is a generally cool lady she allowed my girlfriend to move in with us a few years ago, but as a friend - nothing more.  Our relationship was, and is still a secret.\n\nMy girlfriend has a low income job that couldn't possibly support us if we moved out, and my mother is still as adamant as ever that homosexuality is wrong.  As we're soon to be entering our thirties together, my girlfriend and I would love to get married, and rent a place of our own, but if I just straight out tell my mother she'll blow her top and kick her out and we wouldn't get to be together at all, any more.\n\nNeither of us know anyone that would put us up, and we both rely on my mother a lot for anything from advice to health care, but at this rate it just feels like we're going in circles and getting nowhere.  Please, help, Reddit. Is there any way out of this mess that we're missing?", "summary": "My girlfriend and I are in love and tired of keeping it a secret, but there are no other options that we can see."}
{"id": "t3_1r5mdy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23f] with [23m] 2.5 years LD. In what circumstances is it acceptable to go dark?", "post": "I've been dating my SO for 2.5 years, all long distance. I don't want to emphasis our issues as I've already made my decision. But I don't know how to execute.\n\nHe's been emotionally abusive and manipulative to me for the last 6 months. It's become unbearable. He plays mind games. He's emotionally and physically cheated on me. He would ignore me for days, weeks as punishment. He would break up with me and when I would plead, he'd take me back. Long story short, it's a very unhealthy relationship.\nI've been through some traumatic experiences with men, particularly him. I'm wondering if it's okay if I just disappear. I don't have the courage nor the strength to officially end things with him. I will get pulled back in. He doesn't love me. He doesn't care about me. He just likes the affection, my attention, and the feeling of control. He wants me to chase. I quit. Is it okay if I just block everything without saying a single word about it? He would never come to look for me. He really doesn't give a damn. He's never come to see me. I'm the one who did the traveling.\n\nLast night, I got my clarity. He broke up with me again and recanted it. I told him okay and went to sleep. He texted me this morning with a cute message. I really don't want to respond. I know a lot of people on Reddit believe that's unfair and will tell me to \"woman up\" but I don't trust myself. I need help and I need to get away from him. I love him but he's toxic. He's toxic to me and I need out.", "summary": "Is it ever okay to not officially end things? emotionally abusive LDR. When is it okay to just stop responding?"}
{"id": "t3_4adv2s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my ex [20 M] of 5.5 years. He left me for someone else, now wants to come back.", "post": "Hi there,\n4 months ago my partner of 5.5 years left me to pursue a relationship with a girl from work. As I know, he didn't *actually* cheat on me, however in my heart it feels the same--if not worse because he actually PURSUED a relationship, not just sex. He said he regretted it pretty early on but they continued to be together for two months, and not once did he try to contact me to work things out. \n\nIt was short lived, apparently, and he's back saying he fucked up and he realized his mistakes and \"realized\" that what we have is a once in a lifetime sort of thing. I'm hesitant. I feel so hurt and betrayed, and I feel very disillusioned about our relationship in general. I love him and I am still so very much in love with him, but I just don't really feel as though he won't ever experience grass is greener syndrome again. But then again, we are still young and immature with how we handle things so maybe he did really learn?\n\nSo what I'm really asking is to hear about others' experiences with a situation such as this. Is it worth giving him a second chance?", "summary": "my ex left me for \"greener pastures\" after a long term relationship and now wants to rebuild our relationship. I love him, but I'm torn."}
{"id": "t3_iy28r", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Divorced parents issues :(", "post": "Briefly, my parents split up about 6 years ago, and to say it was an unfriendly divorce is putting it extremely mildly. My dad remarried about three years ago. My mom has not and is quite happy being single. The only people IRL who know my SO and I are engaged are my mom and my sister (this is only until the ring is finished in the spring-ish).\n\nNow that my fiance and I are discussing more details of the wedding (like venue, kind of wedding, photography, etc), I've realized that this is probably going to be a big issue.\n\nIn the past my mom has said things like 'I don't want to go if your father is bringing her' (which I told her was unreasonable), 'I don't want her in any family pictures, she had nothing to do with raising you' (understandable but still perhaps irrational), etc. And it occurred to me that figuring out seating is going to be problematic.\n\nI'm not even sure how people are traditionally seated at weddings but I thought that the  in-laws sat at the same table? I don't think this will be able to happen, and I'd feel like a huge jerk seating my dad and his wife at another table while my mom and my fiance's family sat at the same table. And equally I can't cut my mom out and have my dad sit with my future in-laws, she would be really upset.\n\nWhat do, weddit?", "summary": "How do you handle having divorced parents at your wedding who have quite happily not acknowledged each other's existence (except through lawyers) for years? Any other potential pitfalls I should keep in mind? :/ Thanks for any tips."}
{"id": "t3_4bo1o9", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Sorry, not sorry.", "post": "So I've just moved to a new area from Montana. While I've read tumblr/4chan dumps and whatnot, I really never thought this would happen to me.\n\nSo i go to a Wendy's after work for some fries and a frosty to have with me when I go Folfing right after. Long line through the drive through, so i go in. As I approach the door a younger woman is coming in behind me.\nNow, my reaction to ANYONE coming in a door behind me is to open/hold the door open for me. \n\nWell fuck you too FEMALE. Holy shit guys. I didnt know real people would get \"triggered\" by a common and nice gesture... i mean damn, i woulda held the door open for anyone, but i guess holding the door open for some \"dog kin pentasexual\" person is, \nA. A rape.(hily shit what?)\nB. Supporting a patriarchy  (wtf?)\nC. I said \"sorry maam\" which is a normal responce to doing something a woman (or something that portrays a female externally. ... i guess) doesnt like.", "summary": "its now a crime to open doors for people and I retract my apology nor will I be sorry for doing a kind act. Fuck that."}
{"id": "t3_4xfqj9", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[CA] Can I have a car that is parked in the red towed?", "post": "I live in an apartment complex with a gated parking lot that has its only exit onto a very busy street. The drive way that lets out of the parking lot and onto the street is flanked on each side by a red no parking zone about 2-3 car lengths long so that cars pulling out can have a clear line of site of the oncoming traffic. A few of the apartments face onto the street and legal street parking can be hard to come by. Some of my neighbors consistently park in the redzone adjacent to the parking lot's only exit, which makes it hard to see oncoming traffic. More than a few times I have almost been t-boned by oncoming traffic since my view is obstructed and I either cannot see the cars with enough time, or I have to pull out farther to see around the illegally parked car. I can't imagine that I am the only person in our complex who has had this problem. I am currently writing a note to put on the cars that park there to ask them to please park elsewhere or a tow truck will be called.\n\nMy question is, am I allowed to call a private towing company to tow the car away or do I have to contact police? I would hate to waste police resources with something so trivial.", "summary": "What can I do to get rid of a car illegally parked in the red zone that is obstructing the view of people trying to leave a parking lot?"}
{"id": "t3_444uhs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my Girlfriend [22 F] of 4 years, scared to leave", "post": "All right, I'm sure by the title it sounds like I'm being physically abused. And while there is emotional abuse at play here, that's not what's up.\n\nWe've been together since our senior year in high school, four years now. The entirety of her college career. But I don't feel the same way about her that I used to. I love her still, I really do. But I don't see us together in my picture of the future. I want to go out and do things on my own for the first time. I've never lived by myself, and I need to do that.\n\nWe moved in last June. Things were okay for a while, but it's just gone downhill.\n\nI know it's not fair for me to keep this going when I clearly am no longer invested in the relationship, but it hurts to think about being without her in my life. It hurts to think about the pain it's going to cause her. And mostly, I'm fucking terrified of being on my own after breaking up.\n\nWe moved to a city where I don't have any friends, and all of my friends and family are two hours away. I don't have anyone I can go to in person.\n\nI'm scared I'll never find anyone else. I'm scared of being alone after four years, and not having that person I can go to with anything. I'm scared of waking up each day alone in bed. It just makes me so fucking sad to think about.\n\nSo I was wondering if there was anyone here I could talk to who's gone through something like this? I really need help. This is tearing me apart inside. I'm having anxiety attacks almost daily, and she doesn't know a thing.\n\nHelp. I don't know what to do.", "summary": "I need to get out of my 4 year relationship with the person I love, but I'm scared of what the future holds."}
{"id": "t3_1994tw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Talking and being with my girlfriend [19F] feels completely vapid and almost like I'm [17M] interacting with a machine, however it gets a bit more complex. What do?", "post": "Right, so I've been with this girl for a bit over two months now; she's attractive, we share the same general interests and I should be loving her to pieces. The catch? I'm not, honestly this whole thing feels completely vapid, every time we kiss or even just talk I don't feel like I'm getting any satisfaction, and that I may as well be talking to an inanimate object. Her replies to things are rarely longer than a few words, and even sex felt rather dull when we got round to it.\n\nSo yeah, I took heed of this and decided to tell her that it wasn't working, she cried a bit, and we generally left on good terms, it all felt pretty decent. Then I did a really piss-poor thing and decided to get back with her. Why? Because I felt bad, and I won't deny that this whole thing is anybody else's fuck up than mine.\n\nNow to the actual question: What do? Going in and simply breaking up with her again would look ridiculous, and would most certainly put us on bad terms with each other for the foreseeable future, considering that we have a few close mutual friends, that would also cause complications. I need some advice here, if any can be given.", "summary": "In relationship, feels empty, broke up once then guilted into getting back with her, still feels empty. Help."}
{"id": "t3_2vzv2f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20 M] girlfriend's [19 F] ex won't stop leaving her alone.", "post": "Hi first post here and english is not my native language so don't kill me if I have bad grammar.\n\nShe has been telling me that her ex keeps telling every one to that he regrets cheating on her which he did a lot and to take him back. \nHe does not only do this by talking to her, but also by talking to her family and friends and basically make her look bad for not accepting him back because he is a sweetheart in front of them.\nShe knows better and told me that he has always been manipulative like that. \n\nHe took it so far that he told his mom to arrange a meeting with her (basically them and their moms are going to meet and the moms are going to leave them alone). She already told him that she is seeing me.\n\nHonestly I have mixed feelings about this but I trust her and she told me that she is sick of seeing his face and wants him to stop bothering her. He is probably going to be sweet to her that day.\n\nAs I am far away from her right now, I don't know what to do. I can't be there to accompany her if anything happens and I'm honestly sick of him trying to manipulate people around her to make her forgive him for cheating and take him back. My gf and I agrees that he is a scumbag.", "summary": "Gf's ex is trying to get her back in a really manipulative way and I can't be there when they meet"}
{"id": "t3_rmj8a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So, my new Girlfriend is 2 months pregnant. I'm lost and confused!", "post": "Hey Reddit!\n\nI'm really lost and confused here. Me (M) and She both early 20s. \n\nI've been dating this girl for about 4 weeks, 'speaking to' for about 8. Today she tells me that she is Pregnant, from a fling, considered an abortion, but decided that's not for her, and she will become a parent by the end of the year. (She discussed this with me shortly after she found out herself).\n\nI don't know how to handle it, or how I'm supposed to fit into this life of hers. Obviously it means massive massive life changes in a few months time, and a massive shift in priorities either which way. \n\nBut at the moment I'm so confused at to what this means for me too. Last we spoke, I needed time to think, but I need a bit of advice from others external to the situation who  can see things 'fresh'.\n\nMy thought process at the moment looks like this?\n\n* I'm not sure if I want kids\n\n* How do I date someone who is Pregnant / New Mother (especially when the child is someone elses)\n\n* How would I handle this if this was my own baby?\n\n* What does she need from me in terms of support?\n\n* Would it be unreasonable to 'break up' and 'cut my losses' as it were? \n\nEt Cetera, et cetera... \n\nSo, I'm struggling with the whole \"thinking\" part. I know at some point we need to sit down and talk together, that is a given. But as it stands now I don't know how to organise my thoughts in a sensible and coherent manner. Any advice?", "summary": "My new partner is pregnant, and has been for the duration of the time we have dated. I'm not sure what to think. Advice welcome!"}
{"id": "t3_4j7z99", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16F] was dumped by my boyfriend [16M] after a year of perfection and now I'm lost", "post": "When we met last year we knew of each other but we had never talked but because of a group project we were forced to talked and we instantly started flirting and we knew we had something special. After awhile we started sating and we were each other's first real relationship so we took everything slow. \n\nAs we dated we liked each other more and more but as teenagers we both agreed that we didn't understand real love and we knew we would not last through high school but we made each other happy so we were together. We got serious about 5 months in our relationship and truly knew that we loved each other. We thought that this was the ideal relationship and we even thought we could last. \n\nWe had our problems alone the way like jealously and being too clingy but we got over them. In December he started to change and became more like a teenage boy and stopped being romantic and emotional to the point where he got annoyed if I told him I loved him. He became mean and distant and I did everything I could to keep us together because I still loved him.\n\nHe only got worse from there and said he did not love me anymore but loved me for what we used to have. He broke up with me a month ago and ever since then I cry everyday because I miss him and us. He said he wanted to be friends but he's still really mean to me and today I told him off and now I feel empty and don't know what to do.", "summary": "In love with my ex who doesn't love me back and is very rude. He's in my friend group so I'm forced to see him but I'm still heartbroken and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_petjv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I have a question about a really weird experience my friend had that makes no sense, maybe you guys can interpret it.", "post": "A friend of mine goes to to dance up in Nashville every now and then and recently met an older couple. She says this couple is very friendly and they really get along well. But last Saturday she said that the wife in the couple came up to her and looked terrified and demanded that she talk to my friend in private. The lady goes on to say that she believes in reincarnation and believes that my friends soul and her soul are connected and she goes on to tell my friend that she forgives her for anything she has ever done that might hurt her and then asks my friends forgiveness. She said that their souls being connected was not a bad thing but they had to stop some spirits of some kind. I am in a genuine state of WTF right now and am wondering if you guys have any clue as to what religion or belief system this lady follows.", "summary": "Crazy lady tells my friend that she believes in reincarnation and thinks that their souls are connected and that they have to stop some evil spirits so nothing bad will happen."}
{"id": "t3_4vn3f0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27 f] cant handle this, I am completely alone in this, I thought I could, but I can't. I need advice.", "post": "Some clarification first; \n\nMy hobby is being a makeup artist and now I am doing a friend [26,m] (Lets call him Andy) a favour to help him with his new movie. \n\nMy health is ridiculous and it keeps me from doing daily activities. I have IBS, Stomach issues, Migraines, Stress and above all Borderline and no good stamina/condition like normal people. \n\nNow I am helping with my SO [24,M] and a large film group working on this movie. This is my first day and I already had to wake up at 7 and the director (Andy)  doesn't communicate at all with me about what I can expect to do. I had to sit on the train back and forth per half hour, from 8 am to 3 o clock. Now normally ofcourse I can handle sitting in a train, but I get motion sickness really fast, specially when not focussing on looking out the window. I had to change makeup after every take while sitting in the train. I fet so bad, nearly threw up. I just went and sat in a chair until the actrice came up to me and asked me if I was alright. My SO was not present, but Andy was. He didn't even ask me if I was alright, nothing. Only her and another crew member helped me by getting me water and an apple. Now I still feel sick, and tired. Since I also had to assist with the lightning. Honestly, I already feel exhausted. \n\nI am supposed to stay for 4 days. Today we aren't finished until 11. Tomorrow we start from 10 am til 4 in the night.\n\nI am on the verge of crying. I feel really dissapointed with my friend. And I don't want to stand in my SO his way, since he is incredibly busy and also happy with it. \n\nI am scared to say anything, I want to fight this and continue, but I am afraid that I overestimated myself and collapse in front of all these people. I already get comments like you look tired.", "summary": "Having major health issues. Doing a friend a favor (helping him and his crew making a movie for 4 days straight and also working in the night), and I can't handle it and too afraid to say or do something."}
{"id": "t3_3weya3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by designing an educational brochure", "post": "Obligatory \"didn't happen today\"...\n\nAbout 2 years back or so I was in charge of a big portion of marketing at one of my previous companies and was the only graphic designer. We had just recently kickstarted a community outreach and educational program for parents and their children.\n\nWell, there were community/educational brochures I designed to mass-print in a quantity of 10,000 brochures. These would go out to churches, rec centers, elementary schools, libraries - you know, community orgs and entities. \n\nWhen designing the brochure I inserted a placeholder phone number that was just a random 800 number for proofing purposes (it wasn't meant to stay and was meant to be replaced by a real number to our location). The brochures were approved and sent to print. That placeholder number stayed.\n\nWhen they came in, my manager and I were REALLY excited to see how they turned out (I worked really hard on them). We opened up the FedEx box, pulled them out and my boss turns to the page with the number and says \"Oh! You purchased a new number for this brochure?\" - I acted dumb to play it off and I couldn't say much but \"oh noo....\" \n\nShe picks up the phone and dials it and the good news here is that it turns out it's not a fake number...the bad news was that it was a number to a phone-sex hotline.\n\nI didn't get fired and my boss kept her composure quite well and just said \"okay...let's see how we can fix this\" - so I ordered a bunch of tiny permanent stickers to put over the brochure phone number.", "summary": "Designed brochures, used a placeholder phone number temporarily to get approval, forgot number was there, printed 10,000 brochures with a sex hotline number on the back panel."}
{"id": "t3_20kz11", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I am a hypochondriac/OCD sufferer who has a chance to have regular sex with a really hot guy, but it's DIFFICULT when all you think about is STDs...", "post": "**So, he's really, really hot.** And since I'm not the only one who thinks so, he has been with a lot of girls, and even a couple of guys. More than 100, he said. He doesn't quite know.\nBut! He gets tested (urine samples) regularly, the last time he checked out clean was three weeks ago. The bigger things, like HIV and Hep, he says he tests less frequently, but we live in one of the world's safest countries, there were only 122 new cases of HIV among sexually active men in 2012 (most recent statistics - gay or straight - yeah, I checked), and socialized medicine and strict rules makes it almost impossible not to be alerted within a relatively short timeframe after having had sex with someone who was positive.   \n \n**I know this.**  \nI also know how condoms work. However, I don't trust them. I think they'll break, or that something bad will happen somehow. I lube up, I (or he) puts them on the right way, we take every precaution - but I don't dare letting him finish. I have to tell him to quit, and then I finish him with a handjob or something. He says it's okay, but I hate being *that* girl, and I actually *want* him to fuck me long and hard, I just... I'm too scared. I even had him promise that if the condom broke, he'd go test himself for EVERYTHING just to be sure.   \n  \n**But here I am, freaking out.** Thinking the next time we have sex (if it's fair to even call ten or eleven thrusts sex), the condom will break and I will get AIDS.    \n  \n- - -   \n**... And this guy is literally the nicest guy I have ever met.** He is thoughtful, kind, patient and he knows what he's doing - and he's totally honest. I want him bad. I don't know how to deal with this.", "summary": "Hot man wants to bang, I want to bang, but I'm afraid of diseases and don't trust condoms, feels like shit, wish I could be normal."}
{"id": "t3_2orn9u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 F] with my ex [33 M], he broke up b/c I have a mental illness and I want to get better and get him back.", "post": "My boyfriend of 1.5 years broke up with me recently because I have mental issues and other problems, and wasn't working on them. I also need to quit my job and have major surgery, but I cannot do either of those things for another couple months and have a plan for how that will go down. He's very ill himself, and he said my constant sadness was really wearing on him.\n\nI have an appointment to get my blood drawn to see what's wrong with me physically. I am always fatigued, never get enough sleep, rarely feel good and energetic, and always have headaches. I made another appointment to go to a psychiatrist because I think my issues with depression are not just physical. They tend to get worse in the winter, and a month ago I seriously talked about killing myself, so I think that's what set all of this off. I don't think the illness *itself* bothers him, just the fact that I'm not trying to get better.\n\nI want to maintain my dignity, but I also want to let him know that I'm working on things to the best of my ability. What's the best way to let him know I'm making progress, and to see if he wants to continue things?\n\nI'm thinking of just sending him a quick summary email in about a month to see what he thinks. I texted him this weekend (not the best idea but I'm OK with it) and he said there's a 2/3 chance he would take me back and that he still loves me.", "summary": "Ex left because I wasn't working on things, how do I let him know I'm getting better in a dignified manner?"}
{"id": "t3_2kinrv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm not sure what to do about my current situation.", "post": "I [25/m] have been dating my girlfriend [21/f] for nearly 10 months. This is my second longest, first being 4 plus years, and her longest currently. When we first got together I had been experiencing severe anxiety and panic attacks and they only got worse. She would always ask of I was ok or feeling alright. At first it was great, but soon turned into me feeling like there was something wrong with me when that's all we talked about. It's another story but the shortened version is I quit drinking, 1 month sober yesterday, and I'm in much better health. The issue is that for a few weeks now she's been really worried and concerned about our relationship and it's progressively getting worse. It's turning into an all the time thing. All I hear is \"are we ok?\" \"We're good right?\" \"You still love me?\" And so on. It's driving me up the wall and I keep telling her to just go with it. That I'm getting over anxiety and a 3 year drinking binge. I also have no clue where this came from. I asked her and she always says she was just checking or it was on her mind. Any tips or input? Male or female perspectives welcomed. I'm not looking to break up cause I love her. Maybe just know what she's going through and all that jazz.", "summary": "dating a girl for 10 months. Love her. She's driving me up the wall with her constant questioning on the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_3gvvzw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/F] with my bf [25M] 10 months, is it wrong that I want to talk to his ex to find out why they broke up?", "post": "His ex lives in a different city, and I've never met her, but I found her on Facebook and have gotten into the bad habit of checking up on her every day to see what she's up to. \n\nShe seems perfect, and she and my bf dated for like 5 years and he really loved her. A part of me thinks he still does because the relationship ended abruptly after she was unfaithful to him. He doesn't talk about their relationship. \n\nI know he shouldn't, but I'm so curious to know what he was like with her, and what caused her to cheat on him. I'm insecure of their relationship because I've never dated before I met him, but he loved someone else.", "summary": "Boyfriend dated girl for 5 years. Is it wrong for me to contact her on facebook to see what bf was like in their relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_21pi8g", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Contesting a failure to yield to emergency vehicle worth it?", "post": "I got my first ticket for failure to yield to emergency vehicle. The violation code is 21806 (a) (1)  \n\nI was driving less than a mile away from my house in the slow lane of a 2 lane divided highway road, and I noticed two stationary cop cars with lights on in the slow lane more than halfway away from what seemed to be a blocked intersection. I change lanes to get out of the cops way into the fast lane attempting to follow another car assuming they were going to make a u-turn to avoid the traffic accident up ahead.\nAs myself and the other car had passed the two stationary cops one rushes in to get between me and the car in front of me and the other cop behind me. The car in front stops in the fast lane and I signal and pull over by the side of the curb turn off my car.\n\nA cop walks to my window and asks me whose car this is and where I was going. I reply and tell him where I was going, and he asks for my ID and insurance/registration and walks away for about 20 minutes. I notice during the wait that there are more cars making  u-turns before the intersection and told to stop  but they managed to continue making their turn and then to be told to turn the car around and one vehicle going straight through the intersection somehow without being pulled over.  I notice the car that had stopped in the middle of the road got a ticket and eventually the cop comes back hands me a ticket without explanation of what happened with a smile on his face and nicely asks me to sign it, and I do so out of fear so I can just go back home. :(\n\nWould it be worth it to fight the ticket in court or pay the 490 dollar fine + 57 dollars for traffic school. I'm on a fixed income and can't afford a traffic lawyer.", "summary": "Myself and another car get told to pull over, I signaled and pulled over and got a failure to yield to emergency vehicle."}
{"id": "t3_3coocr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with my fiancee[32M] adopting his brother anxiety", "post": "So, i'll try to make this as short as possible. My fiancee and I are planning our wedding in a few months and hope to be trying for a baby soon (like within the year). We both have decent jobs and live together. \n\nHis 16 year old brother recently came to visit us because he lives with a relative (both parents passed away). Now he is saying they do not treat him fairly, he is uncomfortable there, etc. Naturally fiancee wants to help his brother and told me if anything he will take is brother and raise him.\n\nI know i sound self centered and i'm really trying not to be, because i know family comes first, but how can he make this decision that affects my life as well without consulting me? He never asked how I felt about it, or if i would even be willing to step in and help. I understand how he feels, and would do the same for a sibling in a heartbeat, but I would never just spring it on my partner like \"take it or leave it\". I think that is so effed up. Why should I have to put our plans on the backburner???\n\nHe is a great kid and it isn't anything personal, but we live in a cramped two bedroom one of which is currently being rented out, and the person is moving out soon, so we can prepare the room for future baby. Now it would essentially become his brothers room. I feel like what i want, and all of our plans are completely irrelevent and its his way or the high way. \n\nPlease try to help me not see this as badly as I do, i know i sound horrible and self centered and I feel horrible about that, but i feel steamrolled by all of this!", "summary": "My fiancee is planning on adopting his brother, i need ways to not think selfishly about how this will affect plans I had made for fiancee and I"}
{"id": "t3_23sjn5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] want to build my social environment back up but I don't know how", "post": "Hello there people,\nToday a friend asked me if I got time to hang out with him. I said 'No I don't want to today' as a joke but I followed it up with 'Wait please, I'll take a shower quick' so I thought he sees that I was just joking. When I was done and ready, 1 hour later, he said that he doesn't want. So, I asked another friend but he was busy. My other friends are studying/learning for their last big tests.\n\nNow the thing is, I can remember when 2-3 years ago people here in my town liked me and would always talk or say 'Hello' to me on the streets. I got along very with other people here but mostly I just kept my best friends close to me although I don't hang out with them every day or many days a week, just sometimes right now.\n\nI was able to talk to girls without any problems or I could just laugh together with other guys in my age. In the last few years I just backed off completely. I gained weight. I was weighing 117kg last year in march. That was the point when I told myself that I have to change something. I'm weighing 96kg right now and I'm about to get my prefered weight but I just don't know how to get back to where I was when it comes to having more friends.\n\nI feel alone sometimes.", "summary": "I have a few best friends but I feel alone sometimes and I want to build up my social environment again. I just don't know how."}
{"id": "t3_48nhl6", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I [27M] cheated on my gf [25F] 3x during a weekend. It doesn't change that I love her", "post": "So we got into a fight on a Thursday. She threw a huge tantrum and was just out of control. Because I'm a lawyer I stay rather calm, even when there's a fight and hate when it gets too emotional and dramatic. After an hour everything that can be said, is said. It just makes me feel so weird, when she keeps going. I just hate it. I don't make her responsible for it as a person, because every girl I've been with long enough has her moments.\n\nAnyway. We got into the fight on a Thursday. On Friday she came around and she was being cute again. I didn't feel like it was over for me and I was annoyed that she thought it was okay just like that. Anyway, I left town the same day and stayed in San Diego over the weekend. The result was that I fucked 3 women until Sunday was over. To be honest, I didn't enjoy the sex that much. It's so much better with my girlfriend. Without emotions it doesn't mean much.\n\nThe last time I posted it, everyone told me to confess it, but I never planned to do that and I will not do it. There is no way to prove that it happened, not even I could prove it. She doesn't suspect a thing. I picked up the phone to talk to her even when someone else was there, so she thinks I was alone the whole time.\n\nSo I came back and now it's going better than ever. I realized that I want her and that as her boyfriend I am able to control her emotions a fair bit. Not in a mean way, but I want her to feel appretiated and happy, and not the need to start fights to get what she wants. Also I feel like that weekend gave me a chance to think about us and what I want. It's definitely her. She's beautiful, smart and 99% of the time super loving. I wouldn't want to miss her.", "summary": "Cheated on my gf 3 times during one weekend after a fight. But I feel a lot better about our relationship now and think it will work out well."}
{"id": "t3_428w5v", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I was charged several hundred dollars by a public college because my mother got cancer", "post": "Some background: I'm a high school senior taking college courses because my school ran out. Most colleges I applied to require me to take four subject years and hopefully it lowers my college costs. I pay for these with my summer work money. It is currently the week before midterms in high school which is nonstop work, especially taking all max level classes. \n\nAbout two weeks ago, registration opened up for nonmatriculated students, so I signed up immediately. Last week, a fairly large operation was performed on my mother because of suspicious pains. \n\nThe college emailed me a bill Friday, which saw on Tuesday. I did not see a deadline, just had an enormous amount of homework to complete for that day and was under pressure because my mother was still recovering. That day, an appointment was yesterday. Several details implied bad news, which caused considerable stress. I was with my family for much of the time after the school day ended, after which I worked on my school work until I had to leave for it. \n\n The diagnosis came yesterday, with one of the deadliest forms, which basically consumed the rest of the day. \n\nThe college called me at the end of the school day today to say next Monday is the deadline to pay. I checked my email shortly after to see that they had added an additional multiple hundred dollar late fee, despite billing me last Friday. I tried to call them again, several times, but their lines were full. \n\nSeveral of my full work days just disappeared as a result of the college billing me within the week that the operation and diagnosis were performed. I'm really pissed off because now, considering the likely cost of treatment, is when they would have made the most difference. There is no way for me to contact them now or before the payment deadline, so I have no choice.", "summary": "Not knowing I had two days after seeing a bill to pay it, which were occupied by my mother's cancer diagnosis and nonstop schoolwork, I lost days worth of money as it became more important. I just needed to vent."}
{"id": "t3_3edzur", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my bf [20M] of ten months never posts pictures of us, just of his car, etc.", "post": "This may seem silly, but it's something that is bothering me. \nWe have been happily dating for ten months, and I love him. I know he loves me. We have a healthy sex life, and we can talk about a lot of things.\nSomething as \"little\" as this shouldn't bother me, but it does.\nHe never posts about me or us on his social media. His last post of us or me was back on valentines day. And it wasn't even a romantic pic, just one of me helping him out with a chore of his.\nWhat is the one and only thing he is posting about?\nHis damn car. Every day, multiple times a day, there is a new car pic, new tire pic, new pic about something to do with his car. It hurts, makes me feel like I'll always be second to his car.\nAnother thing; he doesn't have me in any of his profile pictures.\nAnother?; he doesn't have me tagged in his bio, our anniversary date or anything.\nWhile all his friends do that, with profile pics and bios of their girlfriends on their pages, I get nothing. They post sweet things of themselves with their girlfriends, and I get nothing. I have mentioned this to him, and he just says \"its not who I am\". I asked him to try, to which he said he would. But I have seen nothing. I feel like he is hiding me, or doesn't want to show the world we are dating, which I am confused about, as when we first started dating, I was all over his social media. Now, nothing. I don't know if I am over reacting to this, but it hurts.\nAny advice would be great, but please no one telling me I'm crazy, because I already question that about this issue everyday lol.\nThanks", "summary": "Boyfriend of ten months never posts about me on his social media, tag or put me in his bio, or his profile pic, and I am hurt by it."}
{"id": "t3_3llgcu", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by having a crazy friend (poop, piss, trash and fleas)", "post": "This happened a number of years ago. One of my old buddies kind of went crazy (too many hallucinogenic drugs) and he became super lazy. He stopped taking his dog outside to go to bathroom, so the guest room became the dog's poop and piss room. My friend also decided it was too much work to take the trash out to the dumpster so he started throwing the full trash bags into the poop and piss room too.\n\nEventually his power got shut off because he wasn't working or paying bills. This was in the middle of summer in Alabama. Needless to say the apartment became super hot and the fleas from his dog multiplied at an alarming rate. My friend eventually left, but didn't bring his dog with him.\n\nMy other friend and I had to go save the dog from the hell hole apartment. When we walked in, we were instantly covered in fleas up to our shins. It was terrifying! We grabbed the dog and ran. Not sure what ended up happening to the apartment, but I'm sure the people who cleaned it had to go in with haz-mat suits on haha.\n\nMy friend, whose jeep we used to rescue the dog, had to live with a new problem; his jeep got infested with fleas. He tried everything he could think of and eventually just had to set off bug bombs in his jeep. That jeep smelled like death for months after that.", "summary": "Friend let dog poop and pee in guest room. Friend threw bags full of trash into the poop and pee room. Power got shut off and the apartment turned into something from Fear Factor."}
{"id": "t3_1uik1u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 F] keep thinking about my ex [23 M] and all the stupid what-if's.", "post": "Friends for 2 years, dated for about half a year. Chemistry was there. \n\nGo out-of-state for a summer internship, get dumped via text. He says something about an epiphany and how he knows who he actually wants to be with. \n\nHe is part of an organization that I am in and we see each other often. I pretend he doesn't exist and he does likewise. No contact, the routine after break-ups. \n\nSuddenly, half a year later, I'm hit with a torrent of what could have been and all that shit. I'm too prideful to ask him to take me back, especially since he desires someone else, but the thoughts won't stop. Everyday, I walk out of my house expecting him to be there like before. I want to call him\n\nI impulsively talk to him today when I see him (facepalm). I speak with him the way I did in the past, full of jokes and an overabundance of info/commentary. I also am overly straight-forward and ask him to verify the name of the girl I think he wants to pursue. I don't care that he's realized I have feelings for him. I just want these stupid thoughts to leave. I would also prefer not to have feelings for him at all, ideally. Remember, for me, it feels like everything just suddenly hit me out of nowhere. \n\nMy question would be what can I do to reach that state of \"moved on\"? Any creative ideas? I have many hobbies that I partake in and interact with friends regularly, so I would prefer not to get responses like \"find a hobby/friends\".", "summary": "I've become pathetic, pining after a guy. Would like to reach state of less pathetic. If more info is necessary, please let me know."}
{"id": "t3_4i5r20", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "BF (30/M) made fun of me (27/F) during oral sex and now I feel ashamed", "post": "This will be a quick one (I hope) so bear with me.\n\nRecently, I discussed with my boyfriend that I felt we weren't having enough sex anymore. We have been together for 2.5 years and the past few times we have hung out, we have not had sex or he rebuffed my advances. He chalked it up to low energy and stress a few things which I understood, but it just felt very off. Not only could I not recall when we were having sex but when we did it wasn't good at all. At first he didn't agree with my sentiment about less sex, and in fact decided to point out my own shortcomings (regarding domestic tasks) but he took the initiative to initiate and it's been great. In fact, we've been having some  of the best sessions we've ever had, and I feel that he used techniques he's never used before (sorry if it's TMI). I thought we were happy.\n\nThe next morning, we were joking around and it came to the point where I jokingly mentioned that he was trying to turn me into a housewife and he mentioned I was trying to turn him into a sex slave. That threw me off, but I let it go because I assumed he was joking. However, the very next day we were recalling the previous night's session and how much he enjoyed it. I casually brought up the sex slave comment. He then goes on to show the apparently grotesque face I made multiple times and how I was basically forcing his head.\n\nIt seemed like it was in the vein of joking but I felt humiliated. I feel sex is such a vulnerable state and his comments made me feel that he wasn't really into it and having a laugh at my expense, perhaps even resentful that he had to.  When I brought up that what he said was rude, he noted that he was just kidding and didn't mean anything by it. But isn't there a truth in joking? It makes me feel like I can't voice my concerns and now I feel insecure about doing those acts. Am I just being over sensitive?", "summary": "let my BF know that I felt our sex life had fallen off a bit, tried to rectify this but then he made rude comments that made me feel insecure about bringing it up at all."}
{"id": "t3_242g9t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] with my boyfriend [21 M] wants to wait for marriage now after a year and a half of being sexually active", "post": "My boyfriend of a year and a half and I went on a beach holiday a couple of days ago where he told me he would like to stop all sexual activity. We have a good relationship and a seemingly good sex life, he wasn't a virgin when we started dating and i'm finding all this hard to understand even though we've had a long conversation about it. He has a fairly high sex drive so i'm sure its not that he's disinterested. He claimed that it was because of a couple of things that he wanted to do this. Firstly because he was raised in a fairly religious household where they constantly preached marriage before sex and that he felt guilty for breaking that and was now trying to make up for it. He said mostly though it was because he felt like he needed to respect me and the relationship more by not being so focused on sex. \n\nI respect his decision in all of this and am willing to wait if thats what he really needs. I've also never seen him as happy as he was after he made this decision, he said he felt like a weight had been lifted off him and that he could finally love me properly. I don't want to take this away from him but i'm scared for what this means in our relationship. Its one thing for a relationship to progress knowing you both want to wait for marriage, but another thing to go backwards from that kind of physical relationship. I was happy in our relationship and how it was but i now feel restricted, like there are now boundaries that i can't cross and i now can't be fully relaxed and me. I don't want to have to repress my sexual desires and needs but it sounds selfish to say so. I'm really not sure how to go about this because i love him and i won't leave him over this.", "summary": "Boyfriend wants to cut all sexual activity and wait for marriage, I feel uneasy about this decision, How will this impact our relationship? How should i handle this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_50ebs3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [28M] is unaffectionate! Am I [27F] wasting my time trying to fix things? And did I totally ruin things by being so paranoid!?", "post": "My BF [28M] And I [27F] have been dating a little over a year and he is very emotionally detached and very unaffectionate.  I always feel like he's not really into me and his actions totally show it but then when I confront him about it we just fight and he says he wants to stay with me and just isn't an affectionate person?  \n\nI really like him because we do have fun together when we do hang out but I feel like lonely and unloved majority of the time and it's shitty!  And he can go days without talking to me or seeing me.  Wouldn't you want to spend time with your gf!?  I ask him that too and his response is he doesn't miss anyone it's not just me but in the beginning he used to tell me he missed me...\n\nShould I just end things or are there ways to maybe fix it? I mean he says he doesn't want to break up but like it's unfair to me how unavailable he always is! \n\nAnd it's not like he's doing something important he just would rather be with his friends over me.  Idk maybe it's me! Maybe I'm super lame or something!  I can't say he's keeping me around just to get laid bc we don't alway have sex when we do hang out? \n\nI guess he lost affection towards me bc I can be a little paranoid and I accuse him of cheating on me when he is away but only because he's unaffectionate so when you think someone's not into you your brain will take you places!", "summary": "I think my relationship is going nowhere but I want it to work, should I just let it go and move on?"}
{"id": "t3_1o0wye", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19/M] Think I've fallen for her [19/F], but it's become complicated. Need some advice what to do.", "post": "Hi. I met a girl several months ago at College on an academic fieldtrip where we went abroad with our course for a week. We got on while we were there, but when we arrived back home neither of us spoke to each other for a while.\n\nA few days later she started speaking to me and we really began to hit it off. It got to the stage where we were speaking almost all the time, whether it was by text or by Facebook or face-to-face, and one day we got onto the topic of relationships with a mutual friend. I found out that she was not looking for anything, and neither was I, so I thought nothing of it. \n\nWe began to speak less and less over time, and more recently we've been speaking once every few days; a quick text here or there. Earlier on she text me and we got onto the conversation of our plans for the evening. This is when she told me she was going to a guy's house who she was romantically interested in. I was happy to hear this because I love her as a friend and I truly want the best for her, but I can't help but feel a sickening feeling in my stomach, and I can't put my finger on it. \n\nI think I've fallen for her, as hard as I tried not to, and I'm feeling pretty shitty at the moment. I don't take it personally that she likes this guy and I'm happy things are going well for her. My emotions were all over the place about this. I just wish I told her when I had the chance about my feelings for her. I don't know whether I should be cutting contact with her or being there as one of her best friends and supporting everything she does. I love her too much as a friend just to cut everything. I'm feeling so conflicted and need help with what to do. Thanks", "summary": "I fell for one of my best friends, and she's now on the verge of seeing someone. I feel sick inside and I don't know what to do now."}
{"id": "t3_1hud54", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (23M) am having a hard time understanding GF's (23F) \"connecting\" behavior", "post": "So I've been dating this girl for about a year. Things are good, and I think we get along very well. We have our tiffs but hey what couple doesnt.\n\nWhat bothers me though is that shes claims that she must meet as many people as possible; shes really obsessed with \"connecting\" with people. \n\nThe other day when we went out with a bunch of her friends to a bar, she got the number of numerous guys. From what I saw, it was rather innocent in context, but it just bothered me a bit that it seemed like she was actively coming up with \"list\" of people she can get with after we're done... I feel like if I did the same, shed be uncomfortable too.\n\nWhen I asked her about it, she said it was just for friendly encounters and that she just wanted to \"connect\" with people. Now mind you, she does do this a lot. Shell just go to some random store owned by a man clearly in his 50s/60s and will be very friendly with him because she wants to connect... I dont think this is sexual in nature.\n\nI just dont know if this is normal behavior but anyway.\n\nBefore me, shes dated plenty of guys which is fine. But one gets to me more than the others. Apparently on a trip to thailand, she wanted a lay and hooked up with a hostel bartender. Then after the vacation, she went back to further \"connect\" with him. But it seems now that she has no desire to connect with him, and Im starting to think her hyper \"connection\" behavior is some sort of odd... I dont know scapegoat for something. \n\nAm I being a bit too jealous? Should it bother me that shes still actively seeking male friends? (its really the motive that bothers me). It seems really strange to me that someone is so desperately in need to connect with people.", "summary": "gf is obsessed with \"connecting\" with people. Trying to figure out if its an excuse with sinister motives... or if she just is that friendly."}
{"id": "t3_3nd0of", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure if I want to stay in my LTR", "post": "Backstory: my boyfriend and I dated for 3 years in college, broke up because I (28F) cheated. Got back together 5 years later, now have been together 2 years and living together for 5 months. \n\nThe problem: I don't know if I want to stay in the relationship. \n\nHere's why: \nI recently came to terms with the fact that I'm an alcoholic (sober 4 months). I also have bipolar disorder (medication/therapy managed). My father died 6 months ago and that sent me into kind of a tailspin. I then moved across the state to be with boyfriend and closer to my mom, and started a new job (which I love). I've been away from therapy for a few months due to this transition. Adjusting to living with boyfriend has not been easy...I require more space/alone time than he does, and once you live with someone all the things that bugged you about them before become more pronounced. All this to say that I've been more moody/touchy/unstable than I was for the past year. Previously I had been ready to get married and spend my life with this guy, then about a month into living together it's like everything changed out of nowhere. And now I'm avoiding sex with him like the plague and sometimes the thought makes me physically ill. Confession: I started to develop feelings for someone else and I'm not quite sure if it's because he has been helping me in early sobriety or if it's more than that. Anyway, the point is that I now have some good days/weeks where I feel like my old self and am ready to marry this guy again, other weeks I can't stand him. I feel guilty because I'm the one who cheated years ago, then I'm the one who begged him to take me back, so how could I leave after that?? So there's a lot of shit going on and I don't know where I'm at or what I should do. I'd appreciate some advice.", "summary": "not sure if I wanna stay in my LTR and have a lot of personal turmoil in the past six months. Need advice please."}
{"id": "t3_1zy5p0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (f23) and my boyfriend (m32) of roughly a year, work the same shift and same days off at a shift work job. He wants to switch shifts, it could be years before I can follow", "post": "Like I said we've been together just over a year, living together for 4-5 months. Since we began dating we've been both working afternoon shift with the same days off, which really works out to a lot of time together. \n\nNow he wants to go to midnight shift, because it's less stressful. Now I agree with that, but it could be years (probably 1-3) before I could switch. That would leave me coming home to an empty house, eating dinner alone, and going to bed alone every evening after work. \n\nWe've discussed in depth how much that upsets me, and how important it is to me that he not go through with this. However, he feels it's very important to his mental health that he not miss this opportunity. \n\nMy suggestion was that he just wait for a bit until we can both get midnight shift. But his is that he takes it as soon as it's available, and I just wait until it's available to me. \n\nNow, I've never asked him to do anything big for me. I called off a wedding, broke off an engagement, moved out on my own, and recently we moved in together... All because I wanted to be able to spend more time with him. This is the first important thing I've asked for, and I feel dismissed. \n\nHe says he will gladly give me whatever I ask for, at any time, but this is something he can't budge on. All I want is his time, so I don't see how he could make it up to me", "summary": "Boyfriend wants to switch shifts, I don't want him to. There has to be a winner and a loser here"}
{"id": "t3_3imp1z", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me [15/m] with my friends [15/f] [14/f] and something's very different.", "post": "Hi, I'd like to ask for some advice on a strange feeling I've been having. I met these two girls a few weeks ago and (they are sisters, btw) we hit it off great, we had an awesome conversation and everything. We're going to be vacationing with them and another *male* friend of mine next month. However, this Saturday, we're meeting to discuss plans for said vacation.\n\n     The thing is, something's different about the feel of these new friends. My parents went to a party for another friend where they were at (I couldn't go) and they got to know each other more, and said they're \"best friends\" with the whole family. I haven't seen the whole family since those few weeks ago. I'm starting to get strange feelings that there's something wrong....I don't know what. Maybe that they were faking liking me as a person, I dunno. It's super strange considering I've only been around them once and it went so great. But something just feels....off. \n\nI'd like to state that this is a friendship only and nothing more. Maybe this is teen angst. Any advice or answer given is very appreciated, Thanks.", "summary": "I met two nice girls a few weeks back and we hit it off great, but now things seem a bit off even though that's the only time I've talked to them."}
{"id": "t3_2hpdgk", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Should I [21/f] ask my boyfriend [24/m] if he lied about something that happened in the past in our relationship?", "post": "We've been dating for 2.5 years and are getting pretty serious, but I believe that this thing happened in the beginning (four months in) of our relationship, and it just keeps bothering me. Basically my boyfriend told me he was going to be somewhere else, and I think he lied and went to go see this girl he used to have a lot of feelings for who just broke it off with her now ex. I asked him one night after we both drank a lot if he went to go see her and he said no. I'm pretty sure he lied about it, and I've been going back and forth for months about whether or not to ask him while we're both sober. I just can't get over the fact that he wasn't really committed at the beginning of our relationship, and if he really did lie, then this adds to the list of lies he's told me when Ive always been honest with him. \nI want to ask him because I'll finally be at peace with what really happened.\nI don't want to ask him because it is in the past, and I already brought it up once.", "summary": "Asked my bf once if he went to go meet a girl, but i think he lied. Should I ask if he lied?"}
{"id": "t3_ypyuz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Gf (20) Broke up w/ me (27) last night. Need advice, please.", "post": "We've only been dating for 5 months and I know that the age difference has caused her stress. I've never met her parents and she's convinced that they won't accept me and will potentially disown her. I've only met one of her friends, for only a few minutes and things were cordial but apparently that friend is also disapproving of our relationship. \n\nOver the past couple of weeks she's been extremely affectionate, constantly telling me she loves me when we're together and texting/calling to tell me how much she misses me when we aren't. This was a big deal because before she said it for the first time she was convinced that she'd never be in love with anyone. The first time she told me, she cried hysterically. \n\nSunday night we got into a small argument which turned into a breakup argument in which she told me that she's not positive she's in love with me and though she likes me \"more than a lot\", she isn't always happy in her life and thinks that she should be happier. According to her, it \"isn't enough.\" \n\nI should add that this is the 3rd time we've broken up under similar circumstances. In the past she's always regretted her decision and come back. I love her but I don't know how much more of this I can take. The way we left it, she told me she wasn't sure if she wanted to break up or not and just needed time to think, but she sure seems to be leaning in the direction of ending it.", "summary": "Big age diff w/ gf has caused stress. She says she loves me and then takes it back. We're probably breaking up. I'm lost. Thanks guys."}
{"id": "t3_31vmvs", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Just not into me?", "post": "Throwaway cause she reddits.... Basically I met her through work (different departments so rarely do we interact and we have different bosses) and we talked and had some things in common. Afterwards I emailed her to see if she would want to climb the next day, she texted me and we went twice over the course of a week and a half. Our third time hanging out we also got dinner and drinks and when I drove her home I kissed her goodnight. Thought things were going well. We texted a little the following days and then I asked about plans Sunday night (on Thursday or Friday) she said no plans so I texted that I'd love to get dinner. Didn't hear from her so Sunday afternoon I retexted and she basically said she couldn't make it, so I said that's fine how about getting together Monday or Tuesday. Haven't heard anything back. I have this weekend off so would love to hang out with her. Is it worth trying again? Do I wait to see if she gets back to me?  Like I said we did have some good texting after our last date so I am confused as to what happened. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "met a girl, had three good dates, kissed her goodnight after the third, we then texted the next couple of days but now nothing. What happened? What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4yrkrl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] - enjoy being single too much, but is it time to settle down and start looking?", "post": "So I have been single for almost 5 or 6 years now, where I have really learned to love this life. I have gotten to travel wherever I want, do whatever I want, I have a stable career, spend my money wherever, etc. However I'm approaching the big 30, and parent's are starting to tell me to settle down - to the point now where they're looking around for me and setting me up on casual dates. I'm not sure if I'm in the right frame of mind, or if I should really change my mindset and start looking. I do want to settle down eventually, but wonder if I will ever get to the mindset of looking. I always feel like someone will kinda just naturally fall into my life, but if I'm not looking I wonder if this will ever happen.", "summary": "Getting old, parents want me to settle down, enjoy being single too much, do want to find someone eventually. Should I start looking?"}
{"id": "t3_1izm08", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Returning to College", "post": "I've always been socially isolated (usually a small group of close friends, made up of people who are themselves social outsiders.) In the past two years, I've been on one date; in the past four years, I've been in one relationship; my last sexual encounter was now over six years ago.\n\nI'm now 24, and am about to return to college following a three-year absence (I flunked out cause I wasn't doing any of the work.) I plan to be quite busy, as I'll be pursuing double majors in math and computer science, and would rather not delay my graduation any more than I already have. Still, I figure this is a good chance to get back into the world.\n\nI have a few rules/hangups that might interfere with the, er, sketchier advice people seem to give college guys; they basically boil down to \"I refuse to mischaracterize myself or my intentions,\" \"I refuse to have any romantic or sexual contact with anyone I don't genuinely respect.\"\n\nPast that... just looking for general advice on getting out there, meeting people, and moving things forward. I really have no idea how most of this stuff works; I've only been in two relationships, and both of them came about because me and the girl fell for each other so hard that the actual details of what I said/did didn't really matter. I'm woefully unimpressed by what I've seen of the way most people go about this, and am looking for more... open, mature and honest strategies. Theoretically I'm interested in either serious or casual stuff, but it feels like almost everything I have going for me applies more to serious relationships.\n\nMore info (my relationship history, my strengths and weaknesses, my looks) on request, but I don't want to make this any longer than necessary. Brutal honesty appreciated, especially if you see a weakness or shortcoming that it doesn't look like I'm aware of.", "summary": "Life-long loner going back to college, looking for advice on how to get into dating and stuff. Insists on playing nice."}
{"id": "t3_1gyf5t", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "How do I keep two corgis entertained when they don't seem that interested in each others' company?", "post": "The quick rundown is that I don't live with my two dogs anymore so I have to make the most of the time that I see them.  When I visit, they get really excited for a few hours while I run around and play with them.  After a bit, they seem to get really bored and become super depressed.  The following days they just mope around bored and depressed -- they already know I'm around, it's not exciting anymore, they're just bored.  They don't even play with each other.\n\nOccasionally I invent new games for them to play and it's pretty amazing.  I played the shell game with my older dog (his name is dante) and it was like he came alive for the first time.  After a few hours he was cheery straight through the next day, but after a few repeat games he got bored of that too.  I see them so rarely, I want to be able to keep them happy whenever I do show up.  Does anyone know of some unusual dog games?", "summary": "My dogs get bored of things very easily, so I need some clever games to confuse them and hold their interest.  Give me your best games for dogs"}
{"id": "t3_1np6hm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] just asked out my best friend [20/F] of four years, last week. How long does it take to know a relationship would work?", "post": "We have been best friend for 4 years, both have had a serious relationship with other people during that time. During the last 2 years we have been single but have had flings with other people.\nI have secretly liked her for the last 2 years but decided to stay a friend because I didn't want to ruin things between us.\n\n---\n\nI finally confessed and told her I couldn't be her friend without having feelings for her. Initially asked her how she felt about me and she said she only saw me as a friend. I gave her an ultimatum, we try dating or I stop talking to her and move on.\n\n---\n\nIn the end we decide to give it a shot. She wants to take things slow. How long is reasonable time to give this? How many dates?\nI fear that because I have liked her for so long and feel like if I wait too long and end up being rejected that it will hurt me more.", "summary": "Asked out my best friend I have liked for 2 years. She wants to take it slow. How long does it usually take to see if a relationship would work ?"}
{"id": "t3_129g4e", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (21M) perfectly set the board, but continuously fail at execution. Talk some courage into me! How can I overcome my hesitations?", "post": "I am 100% certain this girl, let's call her Emily (19F), likes me.\n\nWe have been on a date, and had a couple of \"afternoon hang-outs,\" over the past three weeks. Hopefully, we are going on our second proper date this Friday evening. \n\nProblem is I suck at physical escalation. I never know when it's \"appropriate\" to take her hand, or put an arm around her shoulder. As a result, we still have not kissed (I tried at the end of date 1, but she turned her cheek as it was sort of out of left field), and I keep failing at getting physical. I did finally hold her on a walk home after a party last night, but chose not to kiss her goodnight because I felt I should properly earn it when we are both sober. \n\nPart of my problem stems from the fact that Emily is shy. I notice at practice she only talks a couple other girls for instance. I find it cute, and don't mind in the slightest, but it it also means I have a harder than normal time reading when is a good time to \"move in,\" as she tends to show less emotion. \n\nI am certain she still likes me, and have received enough positive signs to know I have not yet been placed in the dreaded \"friend zone.\" We text daily, she got me birthday chocolates, and she positively mentioned our first date a full week after we went out.\n\nNow, however, I know I need to make a move. I need to kiss her on Friday. I need to spark physical attraction to kiss her. I need to find courage to stop-doubting myself and just take her hand to spark physical attraction. I have analyzed and over-analyzed the situation, and am really confident we can soon be dating. I just need to find inner-strength and stop hesitating. So talk me up, and how can I overcome these lingering self-doubts?", "summary": "Second date with a girl I like coming up this Friday. I need help finding courage to get physical, so I can properly end our date with a kiss, and hopefully more."}
{"id": "t3_1a3ghj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My best friend [f21] demands too much attention and I [f22] don\u00b4t know what to do.", "post": "Hello there.\nThis girl [f21] and I [f22] have been friends for almost 6 years. We share a lot of common interests and hobbies and we work together. Our relationship has had some ups and downs (My ex fell in love with her, she rejected him and I forgave him, just to dump him later) but lately, there is something that has been bothering me.\nI cannot speak with her the way I used to; I do not want to tell her about some things I do, about the guy I am dating, or about anything else that is not related directly to her. She got angry when I told her some things about my life, and she seems to need the assurance that I am going to be there for her all the time. Also, she knows how to manipulate me and make me feel like everything bad that happens is my fault. I know she has problems at home but I am simply not able to give her that much attention, specially since she is the type of girl who gets a lot of attention for being pretty and interesting and all that.\nSo, right now, I do not know what to do: I don\u00b4t want to \"save\" her from her problems, because I tried and it only went for the worse, I just want to stop feeling like I am walking among eggshells with her, and that anything I do in our relationship is wrong or it does not fit on what she wants.\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Best friend [f21] needs a lot of attention and I cannot give it to her, I don't want to hurt her but I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2lside", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [22M] buy hockey game tickets for a second date with a girl [20M]?", "post": "We had an great first date, she was really easy to talk to, and we briefly made out before she left.  She seems like like an awesome girl.  \n\nI learned she was a huge hockey fan, so I asked her a few days afterwards if she wanted to go to a game with me. Her response: *\"You are so sweet, but I feel really bad as I definitely wouldn't want you to buy my tickets! I would love to go see a game. I'm happy to do anything, it doesn't have to be as pricey!\"*\n\nI told her that of course I would pay for the tickets since I had invited her to the game and that I was happy to buy them.  But she responded saying she still wanted to go out but she couldn't accept my offer to buy the tickets. (We are talking about $50 tickets here, nothing too outrageous).\n\nWe agreed to watch the game on TV instead together.  **Should I surprise her and buy the tickets anyways?  Or do you think she actually doesn't want to go like she says?** \n\nAlso, she is going to study abroad in January (she is still in college, I graduated), is it even ok to be going out with her?\nThank you!", "summary": "Should I buy hockey tickets for a 2nd date with a girl even though she said she didn't want to go to the game because it was too expensive?"}
{"id": "t3_dxfg1", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Need help picking out a new laptop for college.", "post": "For most of high school, I've been the go to \"computer kid.\" I'll be the first to admit that I know a lot about how computers work, and often fix things for teachers before the IT guys have a chance to get a whack at them. I worked at a computer repair shop for half a year as a technician. I've done the typical tech guy thing and drooled over new computers that come out (read: Wired/PopSci/2600 articles and centerfolds). \n\nThat said, I have NO IDEA what kind of computer to get for college. I've always wanted to buy a ton of parts and build my own \"super\" desktop, but I for sure need a laptop. If everything goes according to plan, I'm enrolling at Champlain College next Fall to double major in Computer Network Information Security and Digital Forensics. \n\nA lot of you probably already know this, but this major involves a lot of virtual desktops. Essentially I set up entire networks on my own rig and then go in and play around with them, all from one computer. It takes a lot of processing power and hard drive space.\n\nOver the years I've built up several stereotypes about different brands, operating systems, products... Recently, my mind has been opened back up and I'm willing to take a look at anything, even a Dell or an Asus.\n\nIt's recently been brought to my attention that Macs are actually pretty good. I've always been a notorious Windows-only-guy. I finally decided to bite my tongue and take a look under the hood, and my god are these things powerful... I guess it really does help making everything but the processor in-house.\n\nAnywho, what I really need is suggestions that might work well for my major, hopefully staying under a budget of $1600. Also, what are the big differences between a MacBook and  MacBook Pro?", "summary": "I'm double majoring in computer disciplines that involve a lot of virtual desktops. Any suggestions on a powerful, cheap, reliable laptop?"}
{"id": "t3_43mlrd", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Handicapped Hell", "post": "First time poster, please be gentle!!\n\nSo a little backstory, I'm 17 and I have a handicapped placard because back in July I broke part of my spine in a weird, stair-related accident. I'm perfectly okay now, but walking long distances still hurts. I generally try to park without using the placard, but if there are no spaces or the only spaces available are really far away, I'll park in a handicapped spot. \n\nNow, I live in a town KNOWN for having almost nothing but old people and beaches- it's basically a retirement community. A lot of the old people have handicapped cards just for being old. I tend to get a lot of glares when I walk out of my car after parking with the placard up because I appear fine. \n\nToday, I went to the grocery store and was looking for a spot to park when I noticed someone had parked across two handicapped spots and a crosswalk. I was in more pain with my back than usual, and this really pissed me off. \nSo I did what any logical human would do. \nI parked a few spaces down, went to the cart return, and absolutely surrounded their car with at least 20 empty carts.", "summary": "I surrounded some asshole's car with empty carts bc he took two handicapped spots and a crosswalk with his stupid car."}
{"id": "t3_4gfyyd", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Discouraged applying for jobs after being laid off. How do I get re-motivated to do anything?", "post": "In June of 2015 I was laid off from my job. I was lucky enough to be paid out through the end of August and collected unemployment thereafter. Unfortunately, prior to being laid off I had a lot of medical issues (2 endoscopies, an ambulance ride, and a colonoscopy) so needless to say the lay off was really bad timing. \n\nNow I'm totally drowning in debt, and feeling defeated. I've applied for so many jobs had a bunch that went to 3rd and 4th interviews, but nothing has amounted to anything. It's been almost a year since I've had a job and I have a hard time doing anything productive every day now. I just look at my computer and freeze up.\n\nI am lucky enough to have a very supportive girlfriend and parents who are helping me how they can. Even with amazing support, I feel depressed, defeated, and as low as I've every felt.\n\nHow do people find the motivation to keep at it after so much failure and financial stress? I'm really reach for any sort of guidance I can get now because I'm completely lost.", "summary": "Laid off almost a year ago, up to my ears in debt, and trying to figure out how to get motivated every day to do anything productive and find a job."}
{"id": "t3_2esfey", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(20/F) Me and my SO [25/M] had an argument.", "post": "Two days ago me and my SO of 1.5 years had an argument. Nothing weird all couples have arguments, and we have had others. \n\n*For some back ground info: He is a full-time student who's mom pays for everything he wants, and I work 180 hours a month on the overnight shift, so I am not home a lot.* \n\nThis one was different though. We argued because he lied to one of his friends about me. I asked him about it and he explained he did not mean me, he meant his ex and forgot to put it. Later on I asked if he wanted to go with me to a family function, to which he replied \n\n* \"actually can you drop me off at my friend's (same friend he lied to) house on the way instead? \n\nI replied \"K\" because I was insulted and mad at the same time (He does this all the time.) to which he said never mind then. After that I told him that I did not like that he asked to go to the friends house that he lied to, especially since he never set it straight. \n\nThat resulted in him turning it around on me and making me feel like shit. He made comments about my weight, me not trusting him, the fact that he has paid more of the bills than me, that I'm not a house SO that stays home all day and cleans it. \n\nWe argued some more and then seemed to just talk it over, however I feel numb towards him now. I don't want to have sex, I do not want to kiss him I do not want to even speak with him. I don't know why I am feeling this way but I want it to stop and I have tried to get over it. Mind over matter right??\n\nHow do I get over this?? Has this happened to you? What did/would you do??", "summary": "Had an argument where he berated me, got over it, feeling emotionally numb towards him now. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3a4t6r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26M], wanting to know the rules of 'Internet dating '", "post": "Ive been online dating. .. getting closer with one girl but still texting and meeting others. \n\nThe girls ive been meeting are all nice in their own way,  but what should i do if i end up being exclusive with 'Mary'?    \nDo i drop all contact with the other girls because they may be attached emotionally?   Or do i keep talking to them ?    Im very undecided.  \n\n'mary' knows ive been on a few dates apart from her.. and it makes her second guess how i feel for her. \nHave not had sexual encounters with anyone.  Apart from Making out with 'Mary'", "summary": "seeing a girl.. not official yet..  while talking /meeting others.  What do i do about the 'others' if Mary and i become closer?"}
{"id": "t3_2zzt1g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [16 F] of 4 months, is her in high school, me in uni weird? Is she taking her friends words too seriously?", "post": "Alright, so my girlfriend of 4 months, it's nothing super serious as of yet, but we're really close and she's perfect, laid-back, doesn't complain when I hang out with my friends and don't talk to her for a couple of hours but, last night she sent me a weird message and I wasn't sure how to take it.\n\nThe message read \"Do you feel like you dating someone in highschool whilst you're in uni is going to hold you back from anything?\" (I asked her what the anything was and she put emphasis on girls, and just things in general).\n\nI gave her a long response about how I really feel and in a nutshell she would never hold me back from doing something, and if I thought about being with other girls, I shouldn't be in a relationship.\n\nShe responded basically with just \"Glad I won't be keeping you from anything\" and she thought she was the reason my friends and I had a little argument last month, but she had nothing to do with it.\n\nI personally feel maybe it was an underlying attempt to get me to think about our relationship, a lot of people have mentioned our age difference which is about 1.5 years and to me that's nothing really, my Nanna and Grandad met when they were 18 and 15, but times do change. And I feel she maybe has taken what people have said about the small gap really hard, but she's never mentioned it until now.\n\nIt's only a small time of dating, I'm her first boyfriend and maybe she doesn't know what to expect, I've tried to like, be understanding if she's feeling awkward in certain situations to help. \n\nI'm unsure of what her message meant if anything, did she really just want me to think about that or did she want me to re-evaluate my choice of dating her rather than going for new girls at university, but I have no interest in them and I haven't even thought about leaving her to explore other options in my new environment.", "summary": "Girlfriend asked me if she was holding me back from meeting new girls, seemed odd to me, I wouldn't date her if I thought about it. Am I overthinking this being a way to break up?"}
{"id": "t3_33o66q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "NONROMANTIC Me (20s) having issue with friend (20s) being a SAHM", "post": "Greetings,\nFirst off I will point out I am not against stay at home moms, I want to make this very clear.\n\nMy friend who I have known since college got into a relationship, married and had a premie child in under a year, since then she has insisted that she cannot work, and that her husband work 60+ hours between 2-3 part time jobs to support them. \n\nSince the child was born she has become a helicopter parent, very rarely letting others watch her child, claiming the child has several disorders (some have been diagnosed, others haven't) No one is good enough to watch her child.\n\nIt's been over 2 years, and she is still insistent on being a stay at home mom even though her husband brings in under 30K to support them and is very rarely home. She is constantly complaining about communication and financial issues to me, I keep suggesting she looks to find work as currently neither her nor her husband have health insurance, the toddler is covered by government support. \n\nAny time I bring it up, she gets very defensive and claims that \"family is the most important thing\" and she \"doesn't want a stranger raising her child\"  She will make excuses that childcare is to expensive (which it is pricey) but many moms do go back to work.\n\nTo make matters worse, she knows I am fairly well off, and will often \"attack\" me for not understanding financial hardships, or not understanding being a mom. While I have been lucky, I have also been living off of about 900, to 1500 a month while I'm finishing school. So it's not like I haven't (or am) experienced budgeting, or being low income.\n\nI've been losing respect for her as I think she could help with the financial issues they are currently facing. She has a college degree, he doesn't.  On top of the low income, they have several loans to pay off. Am I horrible for wanting to cut ties? Has anyone else been able to keep a friendship in this situation? \nI feel very stressed by this friendship currently.", "summary": "SAHM friend doesn't want to work even though her husband brings home less than 30K, to support them. I am losing respect for the friendship. How do I solve this?"}
{"id": "t3_2xkco1", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Court House/Backyard Wedding advice needed!", "post": "Hello!  I apologize if this post is kind of all over the place, but trying to quick explain the situation. \n\nMy FH and I are both military (LDR for 4 years) and stationed at different bases.  We have been talking marriage for over a year, planning on doing a simple backyard ceremony within the next year or two.  Fast forward to recent times, and he has gotten overseas orders, leaving in fall of this year.  I am unable to go with him unless we are married.  \n\nTo top it all off, I was recently deployed for 6 months, and at the end of my deployment, my FH deployed to a different area.  By the time he gets back (late spring) it will have been a year since we've seen each other. \n\nAnyway, after discussion, we have decided to get married before he goes overseas.  Then, either I can try to apply to get orders with him, or I will be eligible to go be with him after my contract is up next year. \n\nHe is coming to visit me after he gets back from his deployment, and we have been discussing doing a court house marriage at that time.  The problem with this, is that both of our families would not be able to make it at that time (both his dad and my grandma are dealing with serious illnesses at this time).  We do not want to disappoint our families by getting married without them, but we absolutely cannot wait on the marriage due to the military. \n\nSo now for the advice....would we be terrible people for eloping/doing a court house wedding by ourselves....but only announcing engagement to everyone at that time?  We would plan to do a backyard wedding in fall before he leaves so that our families would have time to plan and be there.  Would 3-4 months be enough time to plan a simple backyard ceremony/reception?  Anybody have experience with either elopment or backyard weddings?", "summary": "Boyfriend and I are both military, trying to plan a last minute wedding before he goes overseas.  Would we be terrible to elope soon, and do an actual wedding later this year so that our families can be there?"}
{"id": "t3_1n1et7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my Friend [20 F] Don't know what to do need help.", "post": "So theres this girl i know that i really like. I think she likes me by the fact she comes to talk to me when I'm working at my school, gives me passionate hugs, We spend all our free time together, and we talk all night.\n\nI would ask her out soon, but she told me awhile back that she doesn't believe she is ready for a boyfriend (we have been very open with one another) she says that she is too immature but still continues to flirt and do all those things listed above,  She has even invited me to her home an hour away to a BBQ that her parents do every once in awhile.  We've also gone out for lunch just the two of us. \n\nI would like to ask her out soon, but I want to do it at the right time. But i also don't know how to ask her out, I'm new at this never had a girlfriend, wanted many but none of them ever worked out.  I just want some advice on what to do. BTW known her for a month.", "summary": "Like a girl think she likes me back, tells me she is immature even though she acts like were predating, don't know when would be a good time to ask her out, Known her for a month."}
{"id": "t3_51atek", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (M22) broke up with my girlfriend (F21) because she told me she was not attracted to me. Did I make the right choice??", "post": "This is my first post on this subreddit, and I really need some insight on whether or not I'm in the right mindset here. \n\nWe've been together for a year. She was my first \"I love you\" relationship. Early on, I did have hunches that she didn't find me attractive very much but that insecurity always blew away somehow and I didn't think about it again. Recently though, I've noticed that we haven't had sex in a while; she's also been pushing me to work out recently, too. \n\nJust 10 minutes ago, I asked her if she's ever had sexual attraction to other men. She said yes. I asked her if she finds me sexually attractive right now, and she said no. Then she said she values personality over looks. She doesn't think physical attraction is a huge aspect in a relationship. \"People get tired of each other after 20 something years of marriage; attraction shouldn't matter much then,\" she said. \n\nI, on the other hand, value physical attraction a lot. I think it's a core facet of a relationship, and it wouldn't be a relationship if it weren't for that romantic/sexual factor. That's what separates things from a friendship. \n\nI feel like I'm young, and I shouldn't stay with someone who isn't making me happy. I also feel like she deserves someone who she finds attractive, and I deserve someone who finds me attractive. \n\nBut Im a little bit unsure about whether or not I made the right choice. \nAm I missing anything? \nDid I make the right choice?", "summary": "my girlfriend told me she's unattracted to me and I broke up with her. Did I make the right choice?"}
{"id": "t3_2x18nr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24F] want to do something special for delightful man [30M] I'm seeing.", "post": "I've been seeing Ryan* for a couple months. It has truly been unlike anything I've experienced before. We are compatible like you wouldn't believe. I get butterflies thinking about him. This relatiomship is going somewhere and I'm excited. \n\nI also have this problem where I don't half ass things. Wonderful in some aspect, comes off as obsessive, I think, in other ways.\n\nAnywho, this Ryan, he just won a huge national competition. It's a big deal for him and the place we work for. I'm ridiculously proud and want to do something special to reward and honor his hard work.\n\nMy plan is: he walks into his wonderfully clean home after a long trip out of the country, sushi dinner and his favorite libations on the table, candles scattered about, his favorite music playing. Massages will be offered and dog will be calmed down from a long run and a thorough brushing. \n\nI'll make sure this will be cool with his roommate, whom is also a friend. Ryan asked me to watch and exercise his dog while he's away, so I have permission and access in his house.\n\nAny other good ideas or things you would enjoy coming home to? Is this too much? \n Thank you, you lovely redditors!", "summary": "like omg, we connect on, like, so many levels. How do I appreciate him without coming off as clingy/crazy/too much?"}
{"id": "t3_11uh34", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I tried helping my Girlfriend and she broke up with me", "post": "Hey reddit, this has been really getting me befuddled about this whole situation. To begin my gf works at a clothing store and 2 months ago they hired this old, stupid woman. She would be mean to customers her boss and of course my gf, for about 2 months after every shift my gf would come home and complain for a solid 3 hours about this one girl. Eventually my family and I got tired of hearing her bitch, so I tried something to get her fired. I went on their website and sent a complaint email trying to get her in trouble (I know very immature :P)\nThat being said I told my gf what I did, she seemed cool but the next morning at work she phoned me, crying her eyes out. \"YOU HURT HER FEELINGS!\" \"I KNOW IT WAS YOU I HAVE TO TELL HER, ITS ON MY CONSCIENCE\" She ends up fucking telling her. Her of all people, 2 months known and she hates her, I've known her for 2 years and we \"Love\" one another. After all that she acts higher than the fucking pope and says you need to think about what you've done, so we're breaking up for now. What do you think reddit? who's at fault? and what do you think I should do?", "summary": "I tried helping my girlfriend, she broke up with me and sided with an old leather handbag shes known for 2 months"}
{"id": "t3_rxdpj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit knows all.", "post": "So, I was with my hetero life-mate looking at some used cars from craigslist. We went to look at one that was in a slightly shady part of town and everything was going great. However, I guess he accidentally left the driver's side window of his car cracked open just far enough for someone to slip their arm in and unlock the door. When our meetup/test drive was finished he couldn't find his Nexus anywhere. We frantically searched all of his stuff and we asked the lady if she had seen his Droid but no such luck. She even let us check the car we came to see and we TORE IT APART looking for the damn thing. We immediately went to Verizon and did everything necessary to report it stolen. This was all just yesterday BTW. Today, he has a brand spankin' new Nexus (gotta hand it to Verizon for being johnny on the spot) and he's re-downloading his apps at counting his losses for his amazon purchases.\n\nCompletely out of left field, the lady showing us the car just called to tell me that she found it in the trunk... sigh... I told my buddy and he agreed that if I paid the balance for his new one I could just keep his old one. Problem is: I'm pretty smart phone illiterate and was planning to get a new one after I got a car and re-saved up the money for it (rockin' a pre-pay tank of a Nokia like a hipster). So is there any way I can set it up so I can have and use his old one? Keep in mind that we did report it stolen.", "summary": "Buddy lost his phone, reported it stolen. It was found but he already got a new one. He agreed that I can have it but how do I set it up since it was reported?"}
{"id": "t3_eeqnf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear professors/college graduates, I need your help", "post": "Hi Reddit,\n\nI'm currently a 2nd year undergrad student majoring in bio. I thought I wanted to be a pharmacist back in high school, but I've found tht bio isn't exactly my thing. After fall quarter, I'll be on academic probation for the second time under the school of biology. A part of me is really hard-headed and doesn't want to admit that due to my past disregard for my academics, I can no longer achieve a competitive GPA unless I buckle down and shut out the world for the next 3 years. Realistically, I don't think that's going to happen. Though I have some interest in bio, I have no passion for it.\n\nMy parents keep on telling me it's do-able with hard work, and they've been such a big source of support and motivation, but other than them, I have no motivation for staying in bio. My parents always tell me that while I have the oppurtunity, I should aim for the highest possible accomplishments since I'm attending a good university, and I agree with them. But I don't know if I should aim for that under bio. They really want me to stay and become involved in the medical field since \"that's where the money is.\" I don't argue with them about that point since I know how important money is to support a family, but I know that I'm not fit for the medical field. \n\nWhat I've always really wanted, but locked away because I knew it is impractical, was to become a teacher. Becoming a high school teacher is fine with me, but I'm looking to be able to support myself with no ones help. I don't know if I can with their salary. Recently, I've come up with a solution to this problem that will make my parents happy, as well as myself. My idea is to become a professor in something I'm passionate about. So... what should I do? I'm contemplating switching into philosophy or something in humanities. I know that I'll definitely be happier if I do, and I see myself achieving more in that field versus science. Also, are there any professors out here that would like to share their story with me? Tips and advice from anyone else would be appreciated as well.", "summary": "I want to switch out of my bio major to become a professor in philosophy or something in humanities, against my parent's wishes. Tips, advice, and stories are really appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_4mcbeh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my fiancee [21 F] 2 months engaged - arranged (she lives abroad) marriage stuff - and I saw a hooker", "post": "Hi...(repost from /r/confessions)\n\nSo I have been setup for arranged marriage (I was initially enthusiastic) and have been engaged since end of March. We're muslims so obviously no sex before marriage, and as this is arranged we have not developed emotional closeness like a standard BF/GF couple in West has. We live in different countries, talk on whatsapp etc, but thats it, \n\nYesterday, I saw a prostitute. This was after 5 months (almost) of being clean, just sticking to standard porn etc. Before those 5 months i.e. prior to January, I regularly saw prostitutes, and I just was getting tired of it, of the emotional tiredness.\n\nTalking to a friend, one solid course of action to take, as it seems I have commitment issues and am unable to work on myself, is to cancel engagement now, despite wedding being in 2 months, deal with backlash which will be limited, and figure things out alone, rather than bring the poor girl on the end of it into things.\n\nOther option - shut up, put up, try and carry on strong as wedding comes up, and hope/pray/make best effort that I will not cheat or do this stuff again during remaining engagement period and ultimately never again in marriage....\n\nEasy decisions for a sleazeballlll\n\nWhat should I do?", "summary": "Engaged in arranged marriage, messed up with prostitute, now what do I do? NB - have history with prostitutes prior to engagement"}
{"id": "t3_1zz9oj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19M] ex [18F] has just entered a new relationship, and it's tearing me apart.", "post": "So, my first ever real relationship started when I was about 14, and me and her were together for nearly four years. \n\nWe lost our virginities to each other, and we thought we'd be together for ever, etc. We split up about eight months ago due to our relationship falling apart quite a bit, and the fact that I was moving away to university acted as a catalyst as well. \n\nNow I've been at university for around six months, and I thought I'd moved on completely, until now, when she told me she is now in a new relationship. It feels horrible knowing that she's being intimate with someone other than me. I don't think I'm still in love with her, but I don't know why I'm feeling like this, I've been sitting in my room feeling sorry for myself all day, and I just can't shake it off.\n\nOur break up was by now means clean and simple, and it took a while after we broke up officially to actually stop seeing each other and having sex etc. \n\nAnother relevant detail could be that the guy she is currently seeing, she had a slight thing with at a festival when we were together, and there was always a bit of tension about him when we were together.\n\nCan anyone help me with trying to get over her? Or working out why I'm feeling like this? I know this isn't a huge issue, and it's probably really common, I just don't know where else to go for help. Thanks.", "summary": "My first (and only real) grlfriend is in a new relationship, and I don't know how to deal with it. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_wryjt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Revenge ideas for a pompous boss.", "post": "Dear Reddit:\n\nHeres the sitch. So my co-worker and I made a friendly bet with one of our bosses. We work in a Physiotherapy Clinic and we have 3 members of the same family coming in to see him so I piped up and said ?I b et you can?t get the mom to make an appointment? and so it began. We drew up a contract that stated that the mom must make an appointment before 5pm on Thursday July 12, 2012. If she made the appointment my co-worker and I would have to call our boss ?Supreme Master of the Universe? for 2 straight days. If she did not make the appointment he had to sing every single request for us for 2 straight days. So she leaves and makes an appt for her and we all think the bet is over. He won. He cashes in on his bet for the next 2 days. It is now 3 days later and I find out she cancelled her appointment but he never told anyone. I need a seriously good retaliation for this. It will not go unnoticed. He can definatly take a joke and is extremely pompous. I need your ideas to exact revenge.", "summary": "Boss didn?t win a bet but cashed in on our punismnet anyways.  How to get him back?"}
{"id": "t3_1nrtmr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[23 M] I was just dumped after a year and a half. My first serious relationship. She [24 F] said some awful things. I don't know what to do", "post": "Alright. So the abridged version is basically we got into it because I looked at a celebrity gossip website randomly and she thought that was weird. Told her I looked at it because I'm fascinated by celebs (who hasn't thought it be cool to b a celebrity?) and she said she can't be with someone who want to be a celebrity so bad (I don't). So she asked to look through my phone history to see and I mentioned I delete my history. (I do. No real reason just always have. Not hiding anything) she says I'm sketchy. I say I can't be with someone who doesn't trust me. She throws my phone and starts walking away. I get in front if her and lightly push her to stop her from walking. Some random guy outside screams \"hey don't touch a girl like that\" She then proceeds to squeez my arm with her until it bleeds. She then slapped my head several times. After this she said she wanted to go home and I offered to give her a ride.  On the way home she proceeded to call me the scum of the earth, said she can't believe the way that I treat her. And I'm abusive.  Told me I don't deserve anyone because I put my hands on her.  What should I do I've never been in love before and this is my first real relationship.  I feel like my whole world is falling apart.  Any advice will be helpful", "summary": "girlfriend of a year and a half dumped me. Said extremely hurtful things. I have no friends. I don't know what to do.  "}
{"id": "t3_44fra6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22M] girlfriend [20F] was called fat by a personal trainer at the gym and I'm not happy about that...", "post": "My girlfriend was at the gym when a personal trainer approached her and he said she had a good shape and was working hard but that she was fat and offered to do something about that by giving her free training sessions.\n\nTo me this seems like an intentional put down to make her eventually want to pay for his sessions. She was happy about getting offered free ones, but with her history of bulimia I'm pretty angry that she's being called fat like that by someone who's trying to exploit her.\n\nI had started expressing my concerns but I could tell it was annoying her because she wanted this to be a good thing but I had to get this off my chest and so sent her a message saying the above and that I loved her and it bothered me someone's insulting her like that.\n\nShe hasn't replied to this yet. Am I in the right here or will she be thinking I'm the asshole now?", "summary": "Girlfriend called fat by a personal trainer offering free sessions, I think she should avoid this guy - am I being a bit too precious here? "}
{"id": "t3_1cflh0", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Friends with benefits question", "post": "i broke up with my ex girlfriend of four years in february. quickly after that, i started texting a friend who was going through a similar situation with her boyfriend. we started texting all the time. i usually don't text all that much, but it was at work, after work, first thing in the morning. it's been like that about a month and a half.\n\nafter a lot of sexual tension building up, we ended up sleeping together. we still continued talking just as much with the only difference occasionally talking about sex with each other, instead of sex with other people. we both decided that we would continue having sex when we are able to see each other (we live in different cities) but it hasn't been the focus of our conversations; it does come up with the occasional sext session. we had a very strong connection to begin with after being there for each other during difficult times in both of our lives. there have been times where she's been hot/cold on the sexual stuff, but the amount of texting has remained fairly consistent.\n\nthis weekend things seemed a little off. the amount of texting, and the responses i was getting were different. a lot fewer, slower responses, and they were much shorter, as to not keep the conversation going. that continued through today, and she has nearly stopped talking to me altogether today. she said she's busy and has a lot going on, she does, but she's been busy since we started talking. between work, her ex situation, she had a death in her family, she's always texted, until now. even without the sex, i do miss having somebody to talk to so i stayed occupied after the break up, but i'm trying to give her space.\n\ni have a trip planned to see her this weekend, i have refundable tickets, so it wouldn't be an issue to cancel, but i would like to see her.\n\nafter all of the back story, here are my questions. should i brush off the lack of communication and go with it until it either picks back up again, or becomes the new normal? should i offer to cancel my trip since she is so busy?", "summary": "was constantly texting friend, started having sex, texting continued for a couple weeks, now suddenly stopped. should i cancel my trip to see her?"}
{"id": "t3_4sl2u5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (20F) boyfriend (20M) is coming down to visit in a few weeks. I want to do something special, but I'm terrible at planning and cooking. What do I do?", "post": "Title pretty much sums it up.\n\nMy boyfriend went to go live with family in another state after we got evicted for awhile and so we're doing LDR visit stuff I guess. For context, we started dating in March 2015, and I moved in with his best friend in June 2015. He moved in too, and we got evicted in May 2016 from our own place. \n\nI'm someone who loves to do special things like go out to eat, swim, spend time, ect during special moments. He is an introvert and we are both broke, so I want to avoid going out and spending money. Garb loves Italian food, and spending time inside playing video games. \n\nI'm a terrible, horrible cook. I can cook 3 things really well. Everything else is ungodly most of the time. It sucks, but it's not everyone's thing. I want to make a special meal for him, but I don't want to waste a bunch of money ruining stuff until I get it right. \n\nI also have no idea what to do. I don't want to spend all day inside playing games and not saying much to each other and whatnot, cuz that was what we normally did when he was here. Going over the top isn't what I'm looking for, I just want to do something out of the way and sweet, but I'm at a loss. We both play Pokemon Go, so that's definitely stuff we're gonna be doing,  but I want to put more effort into making this sweet.\n\nWe are both Nintendo nerds big time, and like a lot of youtubers that do stuff similar to our tastes.", "summary": "newly LDR boyfriend is coming for a visit. No idea what to do since we're both pretty broke and introverts. Help thy fellow nerds out! Please? Hahaha"}
{"id": "t3_228lxw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my ex-boyfriend [21 M] of almost a year, I cheated once with my ex & now we're in a no-contact phase.", "post": "I slept with my ex (let's call him Kurt) in June, 3 months into my relationship with my current ex-boyfriend (who we'll call Harry). I cheated because I thought the relationship was going nowhere & that I was going to end it. But then things changed.\n\nI did not sleep with Harry until that August (after the cheating episode with Kurt). Soon after I fell in love with him & sleeping with Harry was amazing.\n\nHarry dumped me in March for a trust issue, which turned into my confession about the cheating with Kurt.\nI no longer talk to Kurt in any way, shape, or form.\n\nHarry was extremely hurt, for good reason. We're now in no-contact this month and it's killing me. I have been unfollowed on Twitter and unfriended on Facebook. Is this due to the no-contact protocol, or do you think he's trying to move on?\n\nI want nothing more than to start over with Harry. I love him. It was a one-time offense and I am truly sorry & have changed. I'll do anything and everything to be the best I can be for him.\n\nSo, thoughts? Suggestions?", "summary": "I cheated on my boyfriend once with my ex and regret it immensely. He dumped me. I love him and I want to reconcile the situation and start over."}
{"id": "t3_1mm6mw", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I think I'm experiencing dating fatigue...", "post": "For a bit of background information, I am a 23 year old female who is currently in graduate school at a small arts school. After about a year and a half of being single, I decided recently I should try to get myself back into the dating arena with the goal of finding a fulfilling long-term relationship. For some context, the last relationship I had was in a different state when I was at a different school and didn't end particularly well.\n\nI've been having a really hard time meeting people in my new state / city / school for various reasons, some of which I'm guessing at. In order to combat this, I decided to try online dating. I had been on OKC before (which is actually how I met my last boyfriend), but I hadn't had much success in my new area so I decided to shell out the money for Match.com. It's been going... alright. I live about an hour between two major cities so most of my matches are within one or the other. I have been talking to one guy quite a bit, but due to conflicting schedules and the distance, I haven't actually gotten the chance to *meet* him, and probably won't for another week or so. \n\nBasically, I'm posting this for several reasons: 1. I am burned out from the dating. I would love a relationship, but I hate the kind of work it takes to get to a person you want to be with. How do I have fun with dating? 2. I feel like I need to give more people a chance, especially this guy I've been chatting with, but at what point do I need to just say, \"we need to meet or I'm out\"? Or for that matter, how much of a chance should I give *anyone*? How do I know when I'm being too picky? 3. How do you meet people you might be interested in a small area with a busy schedule without much opportunity to branch out of your regular community?\n\nThis is sort of a rant as well, so I apologize if anything is unclear and feel free to ask me to clarify or go into more detail. I'm just pretty frustrated about the situation and would love some thoughts, or just to talk it out. And if nothing else, thanks for listening Reddit.", "summary": "I'm having a terrible time dating in my current life situation. How do I make it easier on myself, or even enjoyable?"}
{"id": "t3_12bpox", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit...Tips for reaching orgasm with my lady? (NSFW)", "post": "I am a healthy 18 year old male, who is in a relationship with a very special lady-friend. We are sexually active, and have pretty good sex. She comes around 4-5 times throughout our sessions, but most of the time, I can't come at all. \n\nI have ejaculated once, but it was from my own during after she was sore, and she wanted to see me masturbate, but when I did, I had a hard time getting off, as if I was shy or some similar effect. I find her so attractive and I like the sex we have, but I often find myself having sex for around an hour or more (until she gets sore), and can't fully enjoy a good sexual experience.", "summary": "I can't come when I have sex with my girlfriend. But I can when I masturbate, how can I fix this?"}
{"id": "t3_3jien8", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Why do hotel booking websites advertise one price, then suddenly hike the price of the room on every hotel I click on?", "post": "It's kind of self explanatory but it's really very frustrating. \nI am going to Bangkok on the 9th and I'm trying to book a hotel. Now I'm not a total dweeb, I have booked loads of flights, hostels, hotels, buses and trains on a very tight budget before this. I feel like I'm alright with dodging the usual scams and tricks, clearing my cache and history to try to avoid trackers, using incognito mode in Chrome, but this time it is just not working. \n\nAfter narrowing down the thousands of options to four hotels/hostels. I picked my favourite, then looked on the booking sites all at the same time (via Quidco to save a few bob), they were all a similar price so I decided to book. \n\nThe first one said this \"Due to a change in availability, this rate has increased since you made your selection\" so onto the next one, what a surprise, the same thing... or words to that effect, it has happened on each website I have been on. They all conveniently went up to the same price. \n\nI have tried it with eight different hotels on each booking website, and every one has done the same. How can they get away with doing this? As it's clearly not people booking in the time of me clicking on to the website and then onto book. \n\nMore importantly, is there anything I can do to get around it? Have you guys had similar experiences?", "summary": "booking websites advertise rooms at one price, then when I click to book they hike the price up on every single hotel I try."}
{"id": "t3_1o45in", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Myself (16/m) and my girlfriend(15/f) have hit a little problem, her mother, and we've run out of options.", "post": "Girlfriend's mother blocks all electronic communications between us (My number, email, youtube, even my imgur account has been put on some kind of watchlist, preventing me from talking to her without GF getting in trouble. Her mom refuses to be an adult and talk it out, rather she would be a brick wall. We live an hour apart from each other, none of us can drive yet, and even if I could, she's not about the #renegadelyfe and wouldn't sneak out, and she wouldn't be allowed out. Her mom doesn't let her go to 99% of school events, just because of the POSSIBILITY that I am there. Please note, I am not \"that kid\". I don't do drugs, I try to be respectable, I'm (to my knowledge and at my friend's opinions) not an asshole. What do, reddit? And yes, she is worth it.", "summary": "gf's mother is being a quite literal brick wall, gf and i cannot see, and barely able to talk to, each other for minuscule amounts."}
{"id": "t3_11g1f0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO [18m] and I [17f] have been dating for the last three years. This next semester will be our last semester in highschool. How do we handle college?", "post": "My SO and I have been dating for three years. He's my best friend and the one person that actually gets me.\n\nHe's been there for me through my parent's divorce, through my grandmother's episode with cancer, and through my stressful life at school. I started this relationship with no intentions or dreams of it ever lasting. I always thought we would break up senior year. Now that senior year is a reality, I honestly can't imagine being without him. He's a part of me and as cheesy as it sounds, I actually love the fuck out of him. (take that as you'd like). We've talked about college and he has this idea that he wants us to move on (if we go to different schools) and meet new people and try out new relationships so that we know that what we have is better than anything out there. \n\nI'm being realistic here--people can change a lot in four years. Is it wrong for me not to want to try and work this out and try a LDR? I am sure there are a million guys out there that I could be compatible with, but that's the thing. I don't want compatibility--I want him. He has this grand idea that we will come back together after college and everything will be perfect. I know he's scared--we've never dated before our relationship and we've never known anyone else the way we know each other. I just don't want to risk what we have on a unrealistic idea. I love him, like honest to everything in life, love him. We get in fights, things aren't always perfect, but we have the same set of principles and we believe in the same things. We are from two very different cultures and I think both of us have learned a shit ton from each other. I know that we're teenagers and we have our whole lives in front of us--but I'm tired of fighting the stereotype or the general consensus that teenagers don't know what the fuck love is. \n\nReddit, please tell me how to go about doing this because if it goes the way it's planned. Summer 2013 is going to suck ass.", "summary": "In highschool, about to finish senior year. Dated for the last three years. Scared about the future and college. We have two different ideas. He seems to live in an unrealistic world--what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1v37v2", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Should I take my cat with me?", "post": "I have been away at college for two years and have been thinking about moving my 12 year old cat from my parents house to my place that is 350 miles away. \n\nMy parents feed her and let her inside if she wants, but they do not pet her or love her. Nobody except for me likes her (she is a bit of a bitch.) Since I've been home for break, she has been sleeping on my bed and we have bonded. I am the only person who likes her and the only person she likes. \n\nThe problem with moving her is that: 1) my apartment does not allow pets, but I am pretty sure the landlord will not find out 2) she has lived on my parents street her whole life and I fear she will not like living somewhere different.", "summary": "Do you think my cat would be happier in a place she has always lived and is used to or with someone who provides her with unconditional love?"}
{"id": "t3_1k4ezs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19M) am having trouble dealing with my GF(19F)'s mother (40F) because she keeps harassing our relationship", "post": "About 2 years ago, I started dating my current girlfriend.  She was amazing and I really like her, but I also hung out with other females alone as well. (never anything sexual and did not have feelings for them) She was not happy about this, and I didn't know it made her unhappy, so after she told me to stop doing that, I did.  That was my mistake in not asking her if it was okay for me to do that.  I apologized, and she forgave me.  Things were okay after that.\n\nHowever, she was confiding in her mom about this situation. She knew what happened for that and how I was supposedly cheating on her daughter with them two even though I wasn't, and now a year later, still brings it up, and it makes my GF really unhappy.  It has gotten to the point to where I don't know what to do anymore.  Her mom constantly doubts what I'm doing and where I am, even though there is proof of exactly what I am doing and that I have never cheated on her daughter.  What do I even do?", "summary": "Hung out with other girls (nothing sexual.)  GF's mom found out.  GF's mom is harassing her and me about it now"}
{"id": "t3_4jx5as", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my girlfriend [27 F] of 18 months, is it possible to work through these problems, or is it a lost cause?", "post": "My girlfriend really likes going out, while I like staying home. I will (and have) admitted a video game addiction that I am trying to rid myself of. She says that I don't spend enough time with her, and I have been trying, and she admits to that.\n\nI feel the reason other than video games is because I have been turned off from the relationship because I don't feel appreciated. I do all of the housework, but we both have jobs. I work at home, she works at a restaurant. I have asked repeatedly for more help with the housework, but she doesn't really do anything. She says it is because I do it all before she has a chance to, but I only do it all because I know she won't do it.\n\nShe likes hanging out with male friends, and one of them she used to have a crush on. I have told her repeatedly how uncomfortable this makes me, to no effect. She seemingly has no remorse for anything. \n\nI do not believe she has cheated on me. She is very honest with me and I have always trusted her, unlike past relationships. She has been better to me than past relationships, and things used to be different.\n\nI do one other issue with this relationship, but I need to resolve how I feel about this one first.\n\nIs this something that I should try to work on with her, even though we have fought about this several times, or should I give up?", "summary": "She likes hanging out with guys and doesn't help around the house, and I don't know if I should continue the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_3s7xpi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[25/F] found a pretty ring that I'd like for Xmas from my [26/M] boyfriend of 3.5 years but I don't want him to think I am trying to get him to propose", "post": "I am not good for figuring out presents for myself but I recently saw this ring online that caught my attention. It's not entirely expensive, about $120. When I saw it I thought it was cool. It's actually black and has these cool gothic looking flowers on the sides but technically it is an engagement ring, it says so on the website. \n\nI really don't want to seem like I am passively aggressively asking for my boyfriend to propose. Because I am totally fine with and would almost rather continuing to be a live-in couple. My boyfriend isn't interested in marriage. His ex was a big traditionalist and would always go on and on about her dream wedding with him. Showing him dresses, rings and venues that she wanted to get married at. This always upset him because he said he doesn't like traditional romance and she would berate him for it calling him a bad boyfriend and saying things like \"he must not really love her.\" Besides her, he also isn't religious and doesn't want us to mingle money because he feels it would cause more arguments partially due to us having very different spending styles. All of this is fine with me (I actually earn more than he does). But I am rambling a bit. Should I just show him the ring? Should I just say fuck it and buy it for myself and ask for something less \"controversial\" or should I ask him but preface it with \"I know it's says engagement but I am not suggesting you propose.\" \n\nSeems like a very small issue and it really isn't a big one. I just don't want to ask people I know IRL because I don't feel like getting the \"WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST GET MARRIED! Why SHOULDN'T he propose???\" etc.", "summary": "I saw a ring I want for Xmas that is an engagement ring but I want the ring just to have it and don't want him to think I am trying to get him to propose."}
{"id": "t3_1r0enc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [21/f] in a 5 year relationship with [22/m], don't know how to show I'm still trying without being clingy.", "post": "* I am horrible at explaining things, so I'm sorry if it doesn't make sense.\n\nI love him, first off.\nLet's get some backstory out of the way.\nWe met in high school, he's my first relationship, I'm not his first. We've been together for over 5 years now, we want to get married, blah blah blah.\n\nI think he feels that I'm not trying in the relationship anymore, because we've decided we want to be together forever.\nI don't know.. how to do that without being clingy.\n\nHe's had 2 friends-that-are-girls throughout our relationship that he's had crushes on. I think it's because I get jealous and I start pushing him away, so he latches onto them to fill the void. I know this is my fault. We talked about this last night. \n\nI'm overweight. I shower once or twice a week. Don't shave as much as I could. I'm honestly stressed out about some family/job issues happening, but I didn't realize how much I let myself go.\n\nHe told me all of this last night, and it makes sense. I made a mental decision that I was going to take care of myself. I'm going to shower regularily, shave often, dress nicely, and find time/motivation to work out.\n\nWhat's really bothering me is I don't know if that's enough. He told me he wants to be with me, for the rest of his life. And I want to be with him. How do I show him I'm trying without being clingy?\n\nI'm okay with him flirting, and hanging out with girls, but I don't want him to fall in love with someone else.\n\nI know I'm insecure. I just... wondered if anybody has some tips for what kind of things I could do, to show that I'm trying. Because I want to try, I just don't know what to do.\nI don't want to smother him, and I don't want him to think I don't care anymore.", "summary": "BF of 5 years doesn't think I'm trying because I'm comfortable with our relationship, how to I try without being clingy?"}
{"id": "t3_528mis", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [15M] am having trouble talking to my [15F] crush.", "post": "I am in my last year of school before sixth form and last year my crush and I were talking quite a lot in class. It was fun, however we only sat together in one class. Now this year I don't sit next to her in any of my classes.\n\nYou may just say why don't just talk to her outside of class, but that's why I'm having trouble. At break and lunch I only see her when she's with about 3-5 of her friends and no less, because I don't know them its hard for me to go and talk to just her when shes with them.\n\nI'd say i'm liked in school, but not popular. People think i'm a nice guy, but as I said not popular. However my crush is popular and she's always around people. They always talk to her and never really leave her alone (not in a bad way). Therefore I can't really talk to her unless she sits next to me in class or I see her on her own (which would only be a few minutes). I do go to a thing outside of school where there is a lot less people and not as many of them talk to her, but the ones that do talk constantly.\n\nI think she thinks I'm a nice guy, but doesn't know me well enough to want to talk to me outside of class. \n\nSo what should I do here? I don't want to let go just yet. Help is appreciated. Thanks.", "summary": "Crush is popular (I'm not that popular), can't talk to her outside of class, because of too many people talking to her and that she doesn't know me too well."}
{"id": "t3_3uik3x", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by wearing contacts", "post": "This was yesterday morning when I was getting dressed for a ROTC event. I was in my bathroom and just got done putting my uniform on when I remembered I need to shave before I left or I would get my ass chewed out by drill instructors. So I went in my cabinet and grabbed my razor and my shaving cream. Then I thought to myself \"oh well let me put my contacts in so I can see what I'm doing. That fellow Redditors is when I fucked up. Now you have to realize it's about 5:30am at the time so I'm tired as hell. So I get my contact put it on my finger and go to grab the solution so I can put a drop or two in the contact before I put it in my eye. So put it in my eye and instantly feel the pain of 1000 needles and go blind in one eye. That's when I realize my tired ass self put shaving cream in my contact instead of solution...not fun.", "summary": "Put shaving cream in my contact instead of putting solution in. Then put it in my eye and felt so much pain."}
{"id": "t3_4r5rqp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16M] feel completely alone ever since the Winter began in my country.", "post": "Ever since the Winter began in my country, which is located in South America, I've been feeling kind of depressed and lonely. I don't feel by any means good, and the situation keeps getting worse and worse. My main problem is I can't seem to get rid of my past: tiny and non-important situations that I shouldn't be feeling bad about at all. Just please, help me. I feel like I'm a complete mess that only creates problems to other people and on top of that I'm useless. I've made people I do really care for worry about me, but it looks like they've been getting tired of it as well, and I can't really blame them. Every single Winter is the same thing, I always get nostalgic and solitude just seems to be always by my side.", "summary": "Feeling really bad. I believe I'm useless and just cause other people problems. People that care about me are getting tired of all this mess. Every Winter has been the same. Help."}
{"id": "t3_47audz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] want to go to a dance with my girlfriend [16F] of three years. She doesn't want to go. Not sure what to do.", "post": "So we are both in high school and we have a dance coming up. My girlfriend isn't really into dances and stuff. I'm not too much of a social person but this dance only happens once every four years so I kinda want to go. It's not prom, it's another type of formal. The problem is my girlfriend really doesn't want to go to the dance. It's a girls ask guys dance and I had to try to convince her to go. She tentatively agreed to go, but told me she wouldn't be having fun. She just found out she has a five hour practice the day of the dance, which is on a Saturday. She could go, but would be super tired. On Sunday she will have an all day tournament, so really her schedule is not helping at all. I don't know what to do. I really really want to go, but not without her. And I would feel bad for \"forcing\" her to go, especially with all of her things.", "summary": "I want to go to a dance with my girlfriend, but she's busy and doesn't want to go. Any ideas for a compromise or alternative?"}
{"id": "t3_16uta6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Growing lust for room mate [21F] driving me [24M] crazy.", "post": "7 months have passed since she moved in. Right from the start, we'd joke about sex, but were very clear that room mates should not get together. Seeing as I am not really attractive, a virgin and she recently broke up with her long-distance relationship, I am 100% sure to be stuck in the friend-zone. \n\nAs our friendship grew, she talks more and more about her sexual frustration. While it would be great if we did have sex, I'd rather have some advice on how to reduce these cravings for her. \n\nThe last weeks have been hell. I have started craving her so badly that I am having perverted fantasies and dream about her regularly. I am even starting to have difficulties satisfying myself through my normal porn routine. This is the first time this has ever happened to me and I am getting really sexually frustrated. \n\nI badly need some help before I do something stupid or even creepy. \n\nTo put it into a nice question:", "summary": "My methods of satisfying myself are failing, leaving me sexually frustrated, because I have started lusting for my room mate. How can I reduce my lust for my room mate or satisfy myself better?"}
{"id": "t3_470rr0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21/M) know I've met the one for me, but I just can't get a crush from high school out of my mind.", "post": "First post here. Seemed like the right place for this, so here it goes.\n\nMy girlfriend (24/F) and I (21/M) have been long distance for over 2 years now, and I know she's the one I want to spend my life with. I'm a student finishing college, she's graduated 2 years now with a steady job a few hours away. We have a stronger bond than I ever though I could have with another person, better than most couples I know seem to be. I know that I will marry her after college one day.\n\nBut, despite this, I still think about one girl (21/F) in particular from high school. I had a crush on her during a difficult time in my life, and I want to move on but I can not. I've seen her in my dreams, sometimes even cheating with her there. I have not seen or talked with this girl in years either, so why is she so strong in my brain? Why is this happening? I don't know what any of this means, but I need it to stop. Any help would be very welcome. Thank you.", "summary": "My relationship with my girlfriend is being inturupted by strong, baseless feelings for another, long forgotten crush and I need help forgetting her."}
{"id": "t3_4l7l4a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[21M] need some advice on how to talk to my gf [24f] about birth control.", "post": "I've been with her for almost a year and a half now. Things lately due to life made us feel a little distant (more her than me) but things seem to be picking up now. \n\nHere's the thing, we only use condoms as our form of birth control. I'm getting more and more paranoid now about her getting pregnant to the point that I ask her to take plan B once in a while when I'm unsure of something and it's so bad that between her periods and when we aren't having sex I'm suffering anxiety over the idea of getting her pregnant somehow and having mild panic attacks over it. Especially when her irregular period gets weird like this month.\n\nUnfortunately she's a little bit hesitant about getting on birth control. She feels like it will add more stress to her life with the symptoms, possible adverse effects and so on. I don't want to deny either of us sex but I don't think I can continue having sex with her comfortably unless she's on birth control. I don't know if I'm being all wrong about this or what. Any advice? I'm worried that by asking and not being comfortable otherwise I'll be the downfall of our relationship", "summary": "Gf isn't on birth control and hesitant about taking it. How do I ask her to take it without being an asshole?"}
{"id": "t3_tujzr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm currently messaging a girl on facebook, and I need some advice", "post": "Hi reddit. I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask this sort of question, but I would like some sort of advice on how to go about this situation.\n\nLong story short, I'm basically getting to know this girl that my co-worker was attempting to hook me up with. Unfortunately every time we tried to meet each other, she'd end up not going (she's incredibly shy). This was a problem since I'm now out of the country and in the middle east for vacation with my family. I wanted to meet this girl before I left, but that didn't happen. However, I knew that she was interested in meeting me, so I added her on facebook. \n\nThrough that, we've started messaging each other and getting to know each other. She's a pretty cool chick and seems like an incredible match for me. However, it takes a while for her to reply to my messages. \n\nI recently got in touch with my (now ex) co-worker and she's told me that this girl has been talking about me and says that I'm interesting. But she suggests that I hold out on asking her out due to the fact that she might not be over her previous relationship and is currently only looking for a friend. But she told me to keep talking to her and to ask her out just a little bit before I get back home, which makes sense.\n\nBut I'm a bit wary, I get friend zoned a lot when it comes to women. I just have that kind of...personality that only attracts friends and not lovers :P I'm just worried on how I'm gonna keep talking to this girl on facebook and sort of....keep away from the whole friendzone deal. I'm still out of the country for at least a month, so the messaging will go on for a while. \n\nSo reddit, what advice could you give me? How can I make myself stay away from the friendzone while chatting with this girl whom I've never actually met?\n\nI'm not sure if I worded this whole thing out well, but if there's any questions needed for clarification, please feel free to ask :)", "summary": "Messaging a really cool chick who may or may not be ready to go into a relationship yet, but is interested in me, as I am with her. How do I not fuck things up?"}
{"id": "t3_13sxjb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21f] boyfriend [22m] says he's over sex. Help me understand.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating just over a month. We started having sex just before we started dating. We're in a (minor) long distance relationship at the present and while visiting him most recently, we had an argument about sex.\n\nPrior to dating him, I was a virgin while he'd had sex with multiple girls over the years. My sex drive is pretty high and considering we only see each other for weekends at a time, we generally have sex at least once a day. However, he said he's over that. \n\nHe got the \"sexxing\" out a couple years ago and that people in \"real relationships\" don't base their relationships on sex. What I don't understand is what this argument is trying to achieve exactly... because people in \"real relationships\" have sex too. It's making me feel like I'm not attractive enough for him to want to have sex with or that when we do have sex, it's not good enough to keep his interest. I don't think that's his intention though, so can someone please help me understand the thought process behind this is?", "summary": "My boyfriend said he already got his \"sexxing\" out a couple years ago and thinks I crave sex too much."}
{"id": "t3_4drmqd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] Her [21 F] Please help give me some advice on dating when neither of you can talk.", "post": "So I am currently teaching english in an asian country, I have made friends here with varied english speaking ability and found I can communicate supprisingly well with little english. All is going well and I'm having a good time.\n\nFriend of a friend contacts me and we talk online (written is often easier than speaking and there is always google translate) we connect and agree to meet.\n\nMeeting happens and it quickly becomes clear she can't speak any english, but the mutual friend is here to help. It goes well and we meet again. This time no friend, but we play silly drawing games and have a good time for serveral hours, it was sweet.\n\nWe want to keep meeting but I am worried the novelty will wear of and the obvious language problem will be insurmountable. I know this isn't the necessary foundation for a lasting relationship but I am enjoying it whilst it lasts and I want to prolonge it as long as I can.\n\nAnyway...any advice? Anyone been in this situation?\n\nThanks", "summary": "Travelling, meet girl, no shared language, have dates that go well, what can I/we do to not loose the excitement and be left awkardly unable to talk?"}
{"id": "t3_2r1n9e", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to use an air horn", "post": "So last night, I was over at a friend's house to celebrate the New Year and had brought over an air horn that I would blast when it was midnight. I had already used the horn to scare some of my friends earlier, and was planning to use it again as a joke for when a couple of my friends finished their game of Smash Bros. Right as they finished the match, I raised it and pressed down on the button. Instead of being met with the screeching noise, however, a large PFFFFFT came out of the nozzle. A lot of the gas used in the can then came out of the sides in between the can and the actual horn, which sprayed right onto my hand. I yelled \"OH, SHIT!\" and ran to the bathroom to wash my now freezing hand and get rid of the chemicals.", "summary": "My last screw-up of 2014 involved the death of my air horn and it spraying bad stuff onto my right hand."}
{"id": "t3_4picnl", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going out on the boat", "post": "Yesterday I went out for an afternoon on the water with my wife and two young boys. I pulled the boys on the tube all the way over to a swimming cove I scouted last time out (we didn't swim then because it was a cold day).\n\nI anchored and we swam for about 20 minutes before someone came down to the shore and started yelling that we weren't allowed to anchor/swim there. They were really upset so I tried to be courteous and we left promptly.\n\nI figured we'd get the boys back out on the tube and cruise around for a bit before heading home. However, the boat just wasn't working right... it wouldn't ever get up to speed. No matter what I tried I wouldn't go like it should.\n\nSo we abandoned the tubing and decided to head to the dock with visions of expensive repair bills dancing in my head. As we came in toward the dock I started prepping the boat (putting bumpers out, etc.). It was at this point that I realized my fuckup. Hanging from the bow cleat was my still-attached anchor rope! In my hurry to leave the swimming spot I totally forgot to pull up the anchor and been dragging the anchor all around the lake!\n\nI sheepishly pulled up the anchor and was so flustered by my abject failure, that I made several more critical mistakes in docking and recovering the boat:\n- I put the bumpers out, but then docked on the wrong side and got a few new dings in my gelcoat from the dock\n- I forgot to lift the prop up all the way so it drug on the pavement as I pulled the trailer out of the water\n- I parked on the edge of the parking lot while I surveyed the damage (since all the boat trailer parking spaces were full) and got an earful from the park ranger", "summary": "What started as a fun day on the water turned into a comedy of errors, with each fuckup causing a lack of concentration that lead to the next."}
{"id": "t3_1k3pr0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[18M/F] with my ___ [18M/F] duration, short-description", "post": "My SO and I are both 23 and we've been together for almost a year and a half now. He's rather introverted and private, and I try to respect this. We barely have any pictures together on Facebook, we're not listed as being in a relationship, and he's never made any sort of grand romantic gesture proclaiming his love for me. This is fine. I understand that different people express their emotions differently, and that the big shiny cheesy things belong more to romance movies than reality. \n\nThe problem is that my SO used to be different. He dated a girl from 17 to 19 and seemed to be effusively vocal about his love for her. There are pictures of them smilingly posing for the camera, pictures of them cuddling and kissing, pictures of him holding up signs on top of mountains and writing elaborate messages in the snow about how much he loves her. He talked about how much he wanted her, how much he needed her, how he would always love her... all in a public forum that I can still see. They're still friends too, so it's not really as if she's strictly a part of his past. \n\nI do trust him, and I believe him when he says he loves me. I understand that people change over time. I understand that, at the end of the day, what matters much more is how someone treats you on a daily basis. He's not completely unromantic either. We celebrate things like Valentine's Day and birthdays, he tells me that he loves me often, and he treats me kindly. But it seems that the passion and spontaneity he displayed in his relationship with her is completely gone now. I can't tell whether that's just a consequence of maturing, or if it simply means that he doesn't love me as much as he could love someone. I would appreciate your thoughts.", "summary": "Boyfriend is sweet but not super romantic. Wouldn't be a problem except that he used to be insanely romantic with an ex. Am I reading too much into it?"}
{"id": "t3_tzh4b", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I can't tell if I'm supposed to step in or not when it comes to my roommate's love life. What do you think, Reddit?", "post": "Obviously, this is a throw away account.\n\nSo I have a roommate who is also an ex-fuck buddy. We are now simply friends. I am a 24 year old female and he is 20 years old. \n\nWe stopped our 'actions' because he decided to become more dedicated to his LDR girlfriend, who he's been off and on with since December of last year. He was confused (aka, young and doesn't know what he wants) while we were together, but I helped him understand that he really did want this girl. I had listened for DAYS about his absolute love and devotion and about how this girl saved him and how sweet she was and....blah blah blah.\n\nAnyhow, he was supposed to be staying celibate for this girl until November, which is when he is moving back to be with her. It took all of about a week for him to go to a party and sleep with someone else (last night). I'm friends with his girlfriend, she called the house four times last night and this morning, and I had no idea what to say. I'm an honest and very open person; I won't lie if it doesn't mean life or death, but I kept his partying on the down-low.\n\nI have no idea what to do. He does this constantly. It's a cycle, I guess. He controls what she does via telephone, but does his own thing anyway. I've talked to him, it lasts for a day or so, and he's back to treating this girl like dirt.\n\nI have no idea how to approach him now, or if I should let her know whats going on. People of Reddit, you all usually hit the nail on the head with these issues....help?", "summary": "Roommate (slash ex fuck buddy) is cheating on LDR girlfriend (my new friend) while controlling her actions over phone calls. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_3mz0i7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] don't understand the importance of trust in my relationship with bf of one year[27 M]", "post": "this applies to my current 1 year relationship with my bf but is more of a general question. I always hear over and over how lack of trust is the #1 dealbreaker in so many relationships, but I honestly feel like being reserved or holding back is just a smart move for alot of reasons. If for example my bf is out for the night and not responding to texts that's ok and I'm not going to interrogate him or go through his texts when I see him, I just mean in a more general sense, as in I feel being reserved and protecting myself/not trusting him all the way is just the right thing to do generally. I have felt this way in all relationships I've ever had and I see no reason to change really. You never really know someone's true thoughts or feelings, and if you open up you are just going to get hurt, so why not enjoy your relationship while also protecting yourself on some level. He (or anybody else) will never have me completely but I don't think our relationship suffers for it.\n\nCan anyone explain why this is so important to many people? I am not a sociopath I swear, just cautious and I don't see why I should change, but it is a problem to other people I have dated. I feel you can enjoy relationships and love without a deep level of trust and it's not as important to me as it is to others.\n\nETA many are reacting negatively which is what I expected/is unsurprising, I already know people get upset about this. Can someone explain to me WHY this is important? I don't want to hurt anyone by being this way, it's just how I feel", "summary": "i always have trouble trusting people and so many say distrust is a dealbreaker but i just don't understand why you wouldn't want to protect yourself?"}
{"id": "t3_2vf68k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19M] sometimes miss being single, but my gf [22F] doesn't miss it one bit.", "post": "Hey guys, I've never posted anything but this has weighed heavy on my mind for a while now and I really just need to let it out somewhere. My gf and I have been together for about 6 months now, but we have been extremely close since I was 17. \n\nI find myself ALWAYS checking out other girls. I miss being able to hang out with my friends whenever I want. Nowadays I'm with my gf almost all day every day, except when we're at work. I don't mind it one bit , don't get me wrong I love her to death. It's just I fear that I'm getting tied down too soon. \n\nWe plan on moving into an apartment within the next few weeks, and I'm extremely excited, but in the back of my mind I can't help but feel at least a little bit nervous. Idk Reddit, I am very confused right now. She also sometimes behaves like we're married already, she gets mad if I go hang out with friends for too long, she gets mad if I even mention other girls for whatever reason, I guess I just sometimes miss my freedom Reddit, what do you guys think?", "summary": "Gf sometimes acts like we're married already, I sometimes miss being single, idk if I'm just being selfish or not."}
{"id": "t3_25bvl1", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "First post- down 32 lbs since Jan 1st. Looking for help on new milestones.", "post": "Good day r/Loseit! First post, I had contemplated posting my journey prior to this but I got caught up with other things and didn't see at as entirely necessary but now that I made my previous milestone I am looking for advice/help/suggestions for the future.\n\nI started Jan 1st at a weight of 286 lbs and being in the Military I had to get my act together...or else! I shook my head at myself in the mirror and got to it. I started small and slow, running short distances at slow speed, rode the bike and eliptical for lower impact exercise. I'm now up to a consistent mid-8 mile split when I do my daily three mile and that feels good. Long story short, lost 32 lbs by the time I had my Physical Fitness weigh in and cut a considerable amount from the mid section. Wearing a belt I hadn't been able to fit since Senior yr in college, granted it's on the last hole... but the one I had been wearing is on the opposite end of the spectrum so I'll take a win where I can get one. 286 to 254 in roughly 3 1/2 months. Lost roughly 4- 4 1/2 on the waist.\n\nMy issue now. Since that milestone I've sort of lost my willpower. I haven't stopped running altogether but nowhere near what I was doing prior to the weigh in. Put on about 4-6 lbs but it's holding steady... which is great considering the amount of crap has made it's weight into my diet again. My next goal is to lose around another 25-30 prior to early August for my friends wedding and ultimately I'd like to finish the yr at around 225-230 and about 15%. I'm around 260 and about 21% right now and would like help getting motivated again as well as healthy ways to lean out and lose weight the correct way.\n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Lost 32 LBS since New Yrs. Previous goal met need healthy ways to motivate and lose to make the next set."}
{"id": "t3_14d0si", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Hey reddit, please help me get my dad self sufficient...", "post": "Ok, so here it goes, my dad (60 years old) has worked a great many years as a floor layer (his entire life basically). Hasn't worked much in the past 5, as his body has basically given out on him.\n\nRight now, he's living in Toronto on welfare basically, but he really *wants* to work. But no one will hire him. He has a lot going against him:\n\n* 60 years old\n* Criminal Record for Assault - hit a guys truck with a shovel while he was in it (in the process of pardoning, apparently it takes 3 years)\n* No drivers license\n* No decent job references (spent whole life contracting, and burnt way too many bridges)\n* Has family in Toronto, but he gets along with very few of them\n* He is quick to anger. He was a great dad, but he never got along well with others who piss him off, which leads us into...\n* Hung out with a lot of shitty people through his life, the type who screw you over when they get the chance. So very few friends :(\n\nBasically I don't know what to suggest for him. Where can he get work? He can't lay floors, too old to function. He can;t do anything customer facing, due to assault record. He doesn't have any office skills.\n\nPlease reddit, I'll take any suggestions anyone has.\n\nOne last point, he is needing to get both knees replaced this year at some point. So aside from being down for about 12 weeks, he probably can't do a job where he has to stand the entire day.", "summary": "Father is unemployed, but wants to work, badly. But he has a LOT going against him. What can I do? "}
{"id": "t3_1ob0m8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] went out with [29 F], but it seems like she's not as interested now", "post": "I'm a 30 year old guy that has been largely out of the dating scene for a while now. Was married, got divorced, had a long term long distance relationship that ended two times because she cheated on me with her ex. I recently moved, and have been using online dating to no avail since I got here until this last week. Met a girl on a dating site, we hit it off I thought, talked for about a week before going out to dinner the other night. I thought that things went really well, we talked for hours, kissed goodnight, and all that good stuff. She said she had a really good time and wanted to go out with me again\n\nThat was Wednesday night, since then she's seemed distant when we've texted, and we haven't talked very much at all. She's shown some interest in going out again, but isn't feeling well today so didn't want to go out later on tonight. Then she's busy all day tomorrow and on Monday as well. \n\nI really like her, but I'm not sure how to take all of this. It's certainly plausible that she's simply been busy with work and her life and hasn't had time to talk to me. But after having been burned previously, having girls show interest and then disappear, along with having been cheated on multiple times, I guess I'm wary at this point. I'm just trying to take things as they come and not read too much into anything, but I'm finding it hard not to freak out at least a little bit. \n\nI'm not even really sure what it is that I'm looking for in posting this, if anything at all. I definitely don't want to come across as clingy or desperate, so I'm just waiting for her to contact me at this point. Feel free to tell me that I'm insane and overthinking things, just be honest. Like I said, I've been out of this for so long that I don't really know how I should proceed.", "summary": "Went out with a girl the other night, thought it went well, but now it feels like she's sending some mixed signals."}
{"id": "t3_2r0jlr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 F] am on a vacation with two different groups of friends who aren't getting along.", "post": "I am on vacation at the beach with some friends. We are staying at a house who was rented by 9 of us, including me. All the people staying at this house - guys and girls - are from my hometown. \nAnd so in another house there are four guys I met at the university and two of them are my close friends. They will show up everyday at the house I am staying at and invite us to have meals and some beers together, but it seems to not be reciprocal. \nThe people at the house I am at clearly show no interest in relating to the guys, for no apparent reason, and so I don't know what to do because I want to hang out with all of them - and it makes me very sad to care about friends who seems just to \"not like some kind of people\" very much. \nWhat should I do, reddit?", "summary": "people don't like each other for no apparent reason. I am the only person both groups know and I am trapped in a beach house for a week."}
{"id": "t3_2nbt20", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Parental rights removed but not in jail", "post": "I just wanted to ask reddit their opinion on this:\n\nShort story is my cousin was caught by my aunt beating and kicking her son (13) to near death in a drunken rage. Authorities showed up, got another call, and didn't come back until 3 days later. Her son (13) and daughter (12) have given MULTIPLE never-ending stories of very graphic child abuse, drug-use, and molestation while in the care of their mother.\nShe has been finally found (after 3 years since the incident of her being caught) to have her parental rights completely removed and the children are now under my aunt & uncle's care.\n\nNow that the judge has found her to be an unfit parent, why is she not in jail for all of the accounts of abuse, drug-use, and molestation by her roommates?", "summary": "my cousin's parental rights were removed for drug use, extreme abuse, and molestation of her two children, but she is not in jail."}
{"id": "t3_2ntvb8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23M] want to buy important jewelry (Greek Lavalier) for my girlfriend [22F]. We've been dating a year and I can't afford it because of her metal allergy.", "post": "Hi, this is my first post to /r/Relationships!\n\nI have been dating my current girlfriend, who I met in college, for just over a year now. We have fortunately had a very strong relationship with few fights. To add a little background, I am a member of a fraternity in college, and I am graduating this semester. I understand this is a controversial topic, but please see me through. A tradition of greek life is to buy a girl who means a lot to you a \"lavaliere\", a piece of jewelry containing the greek letters. However, I am unable to completely afford this before I graduate. I have elected to buy her the necklace chain that this charm will go on.\n\nHowever, she has a metal allergy, which I have not had completely explained by her. From what I know, she is able to tolerate gold jewelry, but not gold plated jewelry.  I don't want to ask her because I'd prefer to surprise her.\n\nWhat I am asking is, does anyone in this sub have any familiarity with this issue, and if so, what karat of gold is reasonable? Must I buy the most pure gold (24K, right)? Or can I skate by on lesser quality? I want to purchase this before I graduate in the next couple weeks.", "summary": "I have about a week to buy my girlfriend a piece of jewelry, but she has an allergy to metals and I don't know what kind of gold is pure enough to not cause irritation but impure enough to not destroy my finances."}
{"id": "t3_1cvmy7", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "The love of my life, please give me advice", "post": "I dated a man starting three and a half years ago when we met at university. He's incredibly smart, handsome, funny, and we really get along swimmingly. However, it became increasingly clear that he was serious that he never wanted to get married and I hate long distance relationships (I have needs that can't be met, primarily intimacy and emotional connection) so we amicably broke it off when I graduated about two years ago. \n\nAfter about four months apart he came to me and said he loved me so much he wanted to make it work. I was extremely reticent but finally consented, because our relationship did show great promise except for the marriage issue and the long distance issue. He had one quarter left and I assumed he'd finish up and get a job near me. He finishes up and for two or three months searches non stop. Gets a few offers, and finally accepts one back in our university town. I consented but said you have six months to a year to search rigorously and find a job here with me or I'm leaving. Our relationship experienced a downward spiral of anger and sadness because he wasn't following through. Finally after a few attempts I just broke it off because the constant depression that his failure to follow through put me in was killing me.\n\nI never told him I still loved him at the end (I did indeed love him before but purposefully began distancing myself to try and protect myself from the seemingly eventual demise of our relationship) and just said he was wonderful and I wished he'd made the choices he said he would. I'm in denial almost about what has happened. I keep expecting him to do some grand gesture and try to win me back. \n\nIs this it you think? Should I tell him I love so he knows just in case? I'm at a loss because I honestly could see us being together forever and am so confused as to why he said he loved me so much but didn't make that commitment. Maybe he isn't ready or I'm not the right woman, but then why didn't he leave me alone a year and a half ago? Why put me through all this suffering?", "summary": "I was with the man I thought I could marry but I had to leave him because being in a long distance relationship with seemingly no end was killing me."}
{"id": "t3_2kzh6c", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Will working for a \"faith-based\" company hurt me later?", "post": "I'm moving to the bible belt for the first time in my life in a few months due to my husband's job relocation (Nashville in fact), leaving my current full-time job to do so. \n\nI've been sending out applications for about a month to see if I can secure a job before moving. So far I have run across many positions and companies that call themselves \"faith-based\" or promote products such as Christian books or movies, probably 50% or the open positions I qualify for. I'm wondering if working for such a company would pigeon-hole me in the future. The rest of my background experience is quite varied at the moment, but it is mostly internships and one entry-level job since I graduated college recently. I likely won't be at this job for more than 3 years (my husband's job will move us once more) so I want to make sure I remain marketable. \n\nFor the record I'm an atheist and I work in the public relations/communications field.", "summary": "Will working are a \"faith-based\" company reflect badly on my resume when applying for other jobs in the future?"}
{"id": "t3_fal7w", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "BF of almost a year is super indifferent about sex -- I'm not.  Help me, Reddit, you're my only hope.", "post": "We're both 18 and in college, and it's an LDR.  I think, in general, our relationship is going really well, especially considering the distance.  We started getting into the sexual stuff around the...3 or 4 month mark, when I went down on him. Every other time after that for a couple months, when I asked, he didn't seem to want to \"go there\" again, but after a talk, we straightened it out and started doing that stuff pretty regularly.\n\nSo before we left for college, I asked him if he wanted to have sex. Both of us were virgins. He seemed blas\u00e9 about it, but we ended up doing it once anyway.  Every other time after that, when I asked, he said he didn't really want to, which made me a little insecure and worried that something was wrong, so I asked him about it and he just said that he's never really cared all that much about having sex and that it's kind of a chore, etc etc. Eventually we ended up having sex one other time, but when I asked if he liked it any better, he said it was the same.\n\nI really don't understand how he can be so indifferent about it, but seem to enjoy our other sexual exploits.  I've talked to him about this a couple of times, but I don't really want to keep bothering him about it; I just really want to understand what he's thinking.  I enjoyed sex (though I didn't think it was the greatest thing in the world, it was still fun because it was with him) and I would potentially like to do it more often with him...I love him a lot, and I don't want this issue to screw up our relationship.  Help me understand what is going on inside his head!", "summary": "My boyfriend doesn't show an interest in having sex, even after doing it twice before with me. I've talked to him about it, but still can't understand why he's so indifferent about it. Help meeee."}
{"id": "t3_jpplv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Holy mother of God, how do I get rid of these warrior-class fruit flies?! They even live IN THE FRIDGE.", "post": "*", "summary": "super-flies infesting house in mass quantities even after all personally-known extermination tactics have been exhausted. Flies collecting at bottom of fridge daily. What the fuck."}
{"id": "t3_1r1ys2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (f26) and boyfriend (m23) have recently hit a road block. We've been together for nearly 2 years but it's suddenly gotten hard for us.", "post": "Things have always been good with us, the start of the relationship had it's up and downs with some health/money/family issues but it never really got us down and we kept going strong. Unfortunately these issues did result in us living together after about a week of us getting together so we never got that new relationship experience with each other. On top of that we also had his dad move in with us so we never got any real alone time. We moved to make the situation better on us and it helped but now it's started to get harder. We're not holding proper conversations anymore and we just don't know what to do when we are together so it gets boring quickly and it's starting to make us unhappy. We've tried thinking of things that can help but neither of us are good at this and it keeps resulting in us blaming the start we had and wondering how we could have that now to bring the spark back, but the only option we have come up with is moving apart and starting again which neither of us really want to do. We do love each other, and this is hurting both of us and we just want to make things better again.", "summary": "me and boyfriend been together for almost 2 years, have lived together for the whole time, spark has gone and we need help getting it back. Suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_1ob5dy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [F 20] deal with my boyfriend [M 19] constantly playing computer games and nothing else, feeling second best", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend now for 6 years. We met in high school and are now living together in the flat we own while we're at university. \n\nEver since we moved in together 2 years ago all I've felt is second best to his beloved computer and computer games. He's studying computer games at uni so I completely understand how he feels about them and have absolutely no problem with that, I don't want to stop him doing what he loves and what he wants to make a career out of.\n\nHowever, it feels as if the only 'proper' time we spend together these days is at breakfast and dinner while we're eating. The usual daily routine is breakfast > uni > dinner > he'll sit on his computer all night! I'll be sat alone looking for something to do > bed.\n\nI've tried explaining how I feel to him, but he always sees it as me starting an argument. He says he understands and will stop being on his PC as much, but nothing changes each time I tell him how I feel.\n\nHow do I stop feeling second best and taken for granted? I don't want us to spend every waking minute together, but an hour a day eating with barely no conversation is not the relationship I want to be in. I've told him i want to take a break and leave which he takes as a joke, and anyway, I dont want to give up on the last 6 years so easily.\n\nSo yeah, any advice as to how I could possibly get him to listen more and maybe not take what I'm saying as a joke would be great.", "summary": "6 year relationship, boyfriend is now never off his computer games and won't listen to how I'm feeling as second best. How do I get him to understand?"}
{"id": "t3_xljys", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Too many \"bad neighbor\" posts lately.  What are your \"good neighbor\" stories Reddit?", "post": "Around 23, I shared a ranch style duplex, attached only by the garages with a 30-something couple. (small 2-bedrooms, but both had a separated LARGE yard.)  I step out for a cig and told my neighbor (who was just finishing mowing his yard) I wanted to see 'George Clinton & the P-Funk' in the mountains, but I only had enough money for gas up there, or the ticket in... I might as well mow my lawn too.  \n\nI thought nothing of it, but five minutes later, he knocks on my door and tells me... \"Here is twenty dollars, have a good time at the show.\"  I tried to tell him it was too much, but he talked me into it, mostly on my promise to pay him back the money when I got paid. Anyways, I got into the show and even snuck in a half-pint of cheap whiskey to mix with free waters. (Yes, people gave me weird looks, when I went into the port-a-potty with clean water and came out with a \"yellowish\" water cup.) I met some good people, got hit on by a variety of cougars, and made it home safely the next morning. When I got home, I noticed my neighbor also mowed my entire lawn while I was at the show. (At least an hour hard work.)", "summary": "Neighbor gave me the $20 I was short to see the P-funk. I had a great time. He even mowed my lawn while I was gone."}
{"id": "t3_4c4ecd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (23 m) best friend (23 m) was being extremely creepy to my girlfriend (22 f) and I don't know what to do?", "post": "I've been best friends with this guy for 7 years. We've always been extremely close and I know he's a generally good guy. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 years and I love her so much too. They're the two most important people in my life. \n\nYesterday I had them both over at my house and we were just having a nice day relaxing, enjoying the weather and we went swimming in my pool. Everything was really awesome, but at one point I left to use the restroom. When I came back I felt an awkwardness to the situation but I wasn't sure why until later. \n\nAfter my friend left my girlfriend told me that while I was gone that he started asking about her nipple piercings, which she said wasn't weird itself but she thought it was odd that he brought it up while I wasn't there. Apparently he then proceeded to ask her to 'show them to him' and when she said that would be weird he said \"you can't just get nipple piercings and not show people, that's a waste.\"\n\nMy girlfriend said that it wasn't a big deal to her because she thinks he was joking, but I feel like the fact that she brought it up to me said a lot and she seemed upset by it. Even if she doesn't think it's a big deal, I do. I just don't really know what to do from here. \n\nShould I call him out? Am I overreacting or is that really creepy for a guy to do, especially to his best friend's girl? I don't really want to lose him over this but I feel like she won't be comfortable around him anymore and he's not worth that.", "summary": "my best friend tried to get my girlfriend to take her top off 'as a joke', but she's very uncomfortable now and so am I, just want opinions on what to do."}
{"id": "t3_12cfji", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[18M] Went on a date with a girl I knew for about a month [18F], asked for another date through text, she didn't respond. Not sure if she lost interest.", "post": "All right, I'll try making this short. \n\nI asked a girl who recently got out of a relationship on a date through text. I didn't say date specifically, she asked midway through if it was, after she gave me a few compliments on my looks. \n\nI said that it was indeed a date. She then went on about how she recently got out of a relationship, didn't know if she was taking a break or not, and told me to not expect anything and that she might break my heart. \n\nBut she did tell me that she will keep me updated. \n\nTwo days later I ask again through text on another date. More than 12 hours later, no response. Is this her way of saying that she's not interested anymore?", "summary": "I ask a girl on a date, she tells me not to expect anything, I don't receive a reply to me asking her on a second date."}
{"id": "t3_wae9n", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU: And fell practically naked into my back garden wherein my next door neighbors who were having a barbecue saw me spreadeagled naked.", "post": "So for some context, I hadn't been drinking at all. But I have some rabbits whom I keep in a pen outside in my back garden. As the night was drawing in I go out to shut them in the pen in my boxers and dressing gown.\n\n As I step over the little wire pen, which is just below crotch height, I don't lift my leg high enough and trip over. And by the beautiful way in which the world works, my boxers snag on the fence and I fall spread eagled into the grass butt ass naked with my neighbors and their friends looking on like I was a alcoholic stumbling around my property.", "summary": "Rabbits taste good in a stew. But they don't taste good when soaked with the tears of my shame and embarrassment."}
{"id": "t3_2g8k8i", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Can my wife take out a loan without my knowledge? (US)", "post": "Background:  Wife and I have been married for 4 years.  We keep our income separate and have separate bank accounts.  We make about equal money and try to split bills evenly.  I pay for the mortgage and car, she pays for daycare and phones, etc.  We only use debit cards, no credit cards.\n\nMy wife recently took out a \"reserve line of credit\" (her words) from her bank.  We typically only ever use debit cards but she was short one month due to a $600+ bill and I guess her checking account has an option to take out the money easily.  It wasn't a whole lot of money but since it's basically a credit card the interest is bad ($1,000 at 12% interest).\n\nI'm more mad that she didn't tell me than I am that she took out the money.  It isn't the first time that it's happened, but we've since paid off the credit from the previous time she did it.  It seems wrong to me that she could take out debt that I could potentially be liable for.  I don't like the idea of having debt that I am completely unaware of.\n\nSo is this legal?  Is there any way for me to protect myself from this?", "summary": "Wife takes out \"loan\" without my knowledge.  Is this legal?  What are my rights in this scenario?"}
{"id": "t3_43h3pq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25f] boyfriend [23m] never want's to do anything", "post": "3 months ago I moved across the country to live with my boyfriend of 2 years (we were in a LDR). I have no friends and family here.  everything is ok and all but we've been bumping heads a lot lately when it comes to going out and spending time together. My boyfriend works  a hard 50 hrs a week as a diesel mechanic. he wakes up at 5am and doesn't get home till about 6-7pm. he is also a Sergent for the army reserves so he has more responsibilities than just the diesel job. he has off (most) weekends. I have a boring job as a security officer. I work 12 hours shifts but I only do 3 days a week. I also do some extra work on the side to bump my hours up to 40+ a week. I usually leave work with a lot of energy to do stuff but I don't bother my boyfriend during the week because I know he is tired and just wants to relax. On weekdays I keep myself occupied.\n\nby Saturday, I am restless to spend time with my boyfriend but all he wants to do is stay at home and play video games. I ask him why he never wants to do anything and he says because he works hard all week and all he wants to do during the weekends is relax at home. ok but... when will there be time for us??? He says when he takes some vacation time off we can do things.\n\nDoes that sound normal to you? Not doing anything at all with your SOs unless on special snowflake occasions? I get that he works hard but I also think he should put some effort into the relationship too. are my feeling validated or an I just being a high maintenance girlfriend?", "summary": "boyfriend works long/hard hours and never wants to go out because of this. I'm dying to go out with him. what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_21ongv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my Long distance Girlfriend [16 F] 6 months, wanting to break up but im also supposed to go and see her this upcoming weekend..", "post": "Found someone online and we hit it off and we have been a \"thing\" since september 2013\n\nIm supposed to go and visit her, she lives about 6 hours away, for the first time. But i dont want to be with her anymore.. I dont like not being able to hold the person or kissing or any of that stuff..\n\nIve been with her through her mom dieing, her sister getting seizures and she always has people leaving her.\n\nI know it will hurt her either way but should i go and visit her or should i call it off before then, and how do leave things better than how i found them?", "summary": "I want to break up with my long distance girlfriend of over 6 months, and im not sure if i should break it off before or after the first visit"}
{"id": "t3_z6ms8", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Just because you're old doesn't mean you don't need to grow up", "post": "The Starbucks crowd can act really entitled, but there's no one worse than this 60+ year old regular.  Let's call him Bill.\n\nBill and I like sitting in the same corner.  I don't know why he does, but I do because it has space for me to put my stuff where it's out of everyone's way and not taking up a chair - it allows me to be considerate.  When I get to Starbucks first, I sit there.  Bill was so openly aggressive about it that I finally just sat somewhere else until he left and switched seats.\n\nBut an asshole is still an asshole, and he'd be aggressive towards me no matter where I sat.  Not to mention, I come everyday and he doesn't, so there are days I'm trying to be considerate and ultimately end up losing out on the seat I like to a third party.  But whatever, it's a seat - I don't own seats in Starbucks and I'm not going to make a fuss about it because I'm a grown up.\n\nWell, after Bill didn't show up two days this week, I decided I'm not waiting for him to have his seat, and he can grow up about it.  He is about 40 years my senior, and there's no reason I should be more mature than him - girls don't mature *that* much faster than boys.  Today I was ordering a bagel - yes, I order as cheap as I can when I'm here - and he saw me and called me a bitch.  And he always throws comments my way, but that was unfairly harsh.  I have done nothing to him other than like the same damn seat and finally had enough of letting him dictate my sitting habits.\n\nI'm starting to bet Bill was raised as an only child and never had kids of his own, because he has 0 signs of maturity despite how old he is.  High road or low, he bitches at me for existing, and I'm not letting him drive me away.\n\nSorry for the rant, but seriously - how do people get to be that old and have the maturity of a two-year-old?", "summary": "Senior aged Starbucks customer acts like he's entitled to a seat to the point that he throws temper tantrums when he can't have it."}
{"id": "t3_3lowok", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (24m) and friend (21f) pretty much fucked up our friendship last night.", "post": "Original post here:\n\nSo last night we go to the bar and end up talking all night, eventually the conversation turns to where i thought it might, about how she doesn't want to marry the guy and how she wishes we got a shot. I thought she was just gonna go for it, and I would have to do all the resisting, but she started addressing all my red flags and telling me that's why she can't just break up with the current BF for me. Because she'd feel like a piece of shit for cheating on this guys after breaking up an engagement for him. She already feels shitty enough for cheating once, and she said its her own damn fault for rushing into the rebound relationship without being sure it was what she wanted. Plus she said she's happy with him, and has no way of knowing if she'd be happier with me so its best to just let things run their course naturally. The night ended with us looking at the skyline on the beach, and it was bad. Like we didn't do anything at all, but the tension was too thick so we left.  So now we're in this odd pseudo relationship where we're trying to be friends, and we both agree it would go well for nobody if anything ever happened, but it is a fucking pain in the ass. \n\nI know I'm under her thumb, but I told her we were \"breaking up\" last night at the beach and that we weren't gonna do this anymore. I know she doesn't mean to lean on me emotionally, its mostly my fault because I haven't had a relationship in about 10 years and I welcomed the company and I can honestly say at worst she's just ignorant of what she's doing. But hot damn, why did one of the hottest girls I've ever met have to do this.", "summary": "Discussed the emotional cheating nature of relationship and broke it off before it started. How do I stay friends, and feel better about this at the same time?"}
{"id": "t3_2cnjf4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [9+ months] is a bad gift giver. Help! [16f and 17m]", "post": "Throwaway because my boyfriend is an active redditor. \n\nI've been dating my boyfriend, 'Tyler', for around 9 months. For each holiday/anniversary that has come up, I have thought long and hard and gotten him many expensive, thought-consuming gifts.\n\nChristmas, Valentines Day, his birthday, and our 6 month anniversary are all things I have spent a lot of time and money making special. I do not have a job so personal income is hard to get, but I have spent $50-$75 each holiday, along with hours of careful planning and gift making. In response, I get a cheap, inpersonal gift, or worse..the promise of a gift. \n\nIt may seem petty or bratty, but I take gift-giving very seriously. I have several components for each gift, and each one takes a long time to do. It upsets me that he has gotten his parents to buy me gifts averaging at around $10 tops.\n\nHe has a job and a steady income, as well as a car. He tends to use those things as excuses. I do not have either of those things, but I still manage to get him something nice.\n\nI don't know how I should talk to him and get my point across without feeling bad.", "summary": "My boyfriend is very impersonal with his presents, and it upsets me because I try to do a lot for him during holidays."}
{"id": "t3_1c28xb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20, M]y sister [17] is dating a friend of my father [26]", "post": "Last week my sister came home after going to her friends way too late. I asked about it, and she went to this guy who is a friend of my father. We also know him a little, and he is a good guy, not someone who would abuse her. She didn't tell my parents, though, but my father suspected something.\nBy the time I'm writing this the following has happened:\nShe went to him twice, lying to my parents where she went.\nI talked to her, and she says she is in love with him. And vice versa.\nShe also said they were going to tell my father some day.\nI told my sister I wasn't sure a relationship with him would be a good idea, because of the age difference.\n\nNow, are my concerns merely social stigma, or should I do something? Should I tell my father, should I tell my sister she should stop seeing him because it's not right?", "summary": "My sister is dating a friend of my father, who doesn't know, and I don't know what to tell my father or if my doubts about the relationship are rational."}
{"id": "t3_3d7tsv", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not using my own clean glass.", "post": "This happened last year, but I feel as though I effed up so hard I should share it with fellow effer uppers. \n\nMy husband and I work opposite shifts during the week. He leaves for work at 4:30am and gets home around 2:30-3, and I leave for work at 10:30am and get home around 8:30. He usually is in bed before or shortly after I get home and has already eaten dinner/lounged around a bit. He'll get tired and sometimes leave his cup or plate from dinner out on the coffee table. \n\nWe don't have a dishwasher so sometimes I will just reuse his cup if we are drinking the same thing. This period of time we were on a cranberry-grape juice kick. I came home from work and made some food, and refilled the cup he had used as it had about an inch  of juice left in it. I finish eating and start chugging the juice and I have a teeny tiny amount left when I notice something floating around and flowing up toward my mouth as I drink. \n\nWhat the hell? What is that? Oh, just my husband's TRIMMED TOENAILS.\n\nI drank a whole cup of dark grape juice that camouflaged anything in it until the very end. There in the bottom of the damned cup were little off white crescents of clipped toenails. I usually ask him to please not throw them on the floor because stepping on them is sick, but what the shit. I'd rather step on them than have my drink flavored with sweaty warehouse worker toe clippings. GAGBARFVOMIT!! I seriously cried a little and then told my best friend who still likes to remind me of the incident.", "summary": "Always check cups before you fill them. Or just use a clean one because washing a cup is not that hard. Today you learned."}
{"id": "t3_2a4vpl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20/m] I annoyed my crush [21/f], to whom I have never confesed my feelings, with a ploy gone terribly wrong", "post": "I've a huge crush on this one girl who is way out of my league.\n\nWe've met maybe twice last year, talked on facebook quite a bit, but she had a boyfriend, so I kind of abandoned all hope. \n\nThis year, however, we went to a concert together in March, and she broke the news to me that they aren't together anymore. We've met once again a month ago, and spent almost the whole day together. Nothing intimate has come out of it. These were the only few successful attempts to meet with her-there were plenty invitations that she dismissed (although mostly for legitimate reasons.)\n\nSo, here's where I decided to try a little ploy: I purposefully put myself in a position where I needed her specific skills to get me out of it. And she did help me out a few times, at first. But then I got too needy, and she outright refused to help me. Now, I don't know what to do. I think of giving her a present, as a token of gratitude for the help, and finally make my intentions clear.", "summary": "never admitted my true intentions (although they should be more than obvious, given the persistence with which I invited her to random things,) tried to use Ben Franklin effect on her, it backfired."}
{"id": "t3_41jnh5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25/F] concerned that my boyfriend [21/M] is doubting our relationship", "post": "So, my boyfriend and I are best friends. He is my entire world and he is always telling, and showing me, that I am his. We live together, and co-habitat very well. I literally don't know what I would do without him. \n\nThe thing is, we got in a pretty bad argument the other day, regarding going out with some friends. Long story short, I ended up telling him to go away, he packed his stuff. He never left, and we talked it out, but I feel like since that's happened we both have been feeling weird. I feel nervous all the time, and I feel like he is questioning whether or not he even wants to be in this relationship. I have tried to talk to him about it, and he says he's not going to leave, but he's been super quiet, and just different around me lately. We don't joke as much, laugh, and he just looks miserable. \n\nI have no idea what to do or think. Should I just let it go and see what happens (while being scared to death and worried) or should I tell him all of this again? How would I even know if he's doubting us or not?", "summary": "had an argument with my bf that spiraled out of control, now I feel like he is questioning whether he wants to be with me or not."}
{"id": "t3_3bsb2r", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Need advice regarding 2 vehicle accidents.", "post": "Hey reddit,\nIll get right to the point. 5 weeks ago i was involved in an accident where a state trooper rear ended me. It took a very long time to deal with their insurance but my vehicle was drivable (rear bumper and trunk pushed in) ive received a check from them and had an appointment to fix my vehicle this thursday 07/02/15. Fast forward to Monday 06/29/15.... I was rear ended again. This accident pushed my rear bumper and trunk in more, possibly sustained more damage. I just dropped it off at repair facilty. What happens next? Does the insurance from car accident #2 cover all of the damages? What do I do with the check received from car accident #1? Thanks again for all your help reddit!", "summary": "Got rear ended twice. Did not fix the first accident in time. Now have check for 1st accident and vehicle at repair facility for the 2nd accident. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2oesbs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I stop caring so much about being single?", "post": "I'm a 23 year old, single virgin medical student. I'm trying to find someone to date but every girl is seemingly either taken here or not looking for anything. Also, I'm reluctant to even ask anyone out because I'm scared of my having my life change drastically by virtue of being in a relationship. Even so, I still get depressed when I meet a nice girl and find out she's in a relationship. I don't want to end up alone in my 30s while all my friends are living happily ever after. How do I stop caring about all this?", "summary": "23M single, virgin, can't find a girl to date, get depressed when I meet nice girls and find out they are in relationships."}
{"id": "t3_4vchv5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] got admitted to university in Denmark. My [18F] girlfriend of 1 year was supposed to study with me, but did not get accepted. I have to choose between relationship and education, and I have no idea what to do.", "post": "Today I received my admission letter, which was saying that I am offered a study place at university in Denmark. I have already payed a material fee of $250 a month ago. \n\nIt turned out that my girlfriend didn't get admitted, and she has no place to study at the moment. I really want to study abroad, but I don't want to leave her. What's worth noting is that I also got admitted to local university, so I can choose whether to go or stay.\n\nI'm young and bad at taking decisions, so I decided to ask you for an advice, perhaps from someone older than me. Thanks in advice.", "summary": "I got admitted to university abroad, my gf didn't. I have to choose between her and studies, and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2hly9o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] starting to date someone [33 F] Im worried about the age gap", "post": "Hi,\n\nIt's not really a problem, more of a \"how do I handle this\" situation and I was looking for different opinions. I have started to date a lovely women, she's gorgeous, funny and intelligent and I really like her but one thing holding me back is the age gap. I'm 26 and she is 33, we are into the same things and such but I have a nagging voice in my head saying \"she's too old for you\". \n\nI've only dated women my own age before so I am worried what other people might make of the relationship. Reddit, Am I being an idiot for worrying about ages with a wonderful woman and how can I get around this?", "summary": "I'm dating awesome older woman, want to take things further but worried about age gap, am I worrying for no reason and what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_27rr6z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not even enough physical attraction to enjoy kissing my (m24) girlfriend (f23.)", "post": "We have been together for three years now, and I can not think of a time that I have ever been actually physically attracted to my girlfriend.  I love her to death, the thought of not being with her makes me feel ill to my stomach; yet I cannot even enjoy sex, kissing, or anything actually intimate with her.\n\nAside from the lack of physical attraction, we do enjoy each other's company. She takes great care of me, heeding to my needs and I heed to hers as well. Our personalities are quite different, I am an introvert and can go a long time without doing social events. She, however, is a strong extrovert and constantly needs to be doing something different. We've recently had arguments about me needing to be doing more activities with her, other than going to the movies, hanging out at the house, and going to the bars with our friends.\n\nTo give it a short summary. I am not physically attracted to her, our personalities differ completely, and I do not feel fully committed to our relationship like she is. I feel like I am doing her an injustice by keeping her from finding a guy that likes to do all the activities that she does. And more over, a guy that will put more of his own love into the relationship.", "summary": "I feel like I am holding her back from a truly happy relationship while I fake being physically and emotionally attracted to her because I am scared of losing her. (or being alone again?)"}
{"id": "t3_3rnh62", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Tip: When in doubt, just ask.", "post": "Short story time. \n\nI made a goof recently with paying my credit card bill. I always pay in full the week prior to it being due. I don't do auto pay for this card because often times I have things being refunded back to it or credited to it and would rather calculate how much I need to pay to hit $0 balance myself. Whereas with auto pay it would likely overpay and I would have account credits. Not a big deal, but something that bothers me.\n\nAnyways. I was going out for the weekend. So I quickly jumped on, figured out what I needed and hit pay, got up and ran out the door without even looking back. Didn't check my email for confirmation and overall just screwed up.\n\nToday I got an email from my creditor (Chase) saying that I was late in paying and was hit with a $25 Late fee. Obviously I was distraught. \n\nI immediately got in contact with them and asked if there was an off chance that since I have never been late before and use this card a lot if they could waive the late fee and interest charges I would likely incur. Without hesitation they said \"No Problem\". They credited me the late fee and are waiving interest for 2 months. \n\nNeedless to say, I was relieved. Even though it wasn't a lot of money, it was stressful. I haven't paid interest in nearly a year and dread the thought of ever doing so again.", "summary": "When in doubt. Give a call, or at least send a message. Even if its only over a few dollars. These places love your business and will lend a hand."}
{"id": "t3_38uyke", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[m23] Me and the last girl I had really a connection to [f23] broke up nearly 2 years ago and I've been having the urge break a year and a half of silence after so long. How should I proceed?", "post": "First off, it'd be nice to mention that me and this girl dated for 5 years, from we were 16 to 21; through most of high school and college. Like any relationship, we had highs and lows brought on by both of us which always became passive aggressive.\n\nAfter one mistaken night, she felt I had taken advantage of her(however, I hadn't), broke up with me, and then proceeded to call me every name in the book to our social circle(abuser, manipulator, cheater, rapist, etc; all things which never happened). So we break up and neither of us take it well and we keep a thin line of communication which eventually breaks down. I start seeing somebody new and I presume she does too but I couldn't say for sure. \n\nAround this time, I find out she's been stalking me through a web service to monitor traffic for a personal blog that I host. It's obsessive, she checked it multiple times a day, even hundreds of times a month. At some point, she finally slows down on it months later, noticeably when she finds out me and a fling stopped seeing one another.\n\nThe kicker ends up being that I've still thought about this girl I dated for 5 years everyday since we've broken up. I want to reach out to her but we had such a toxic thing in the past but I know I've grown as person a long time since but I don't know what good it'd do breaking this near 2 years of silence. I don't have an endgame really; more than anything, I just want to hear from her and see how she's been particularly since she appears to be doing well, however I don't want to adversely affect her and cause more drama and emotional strife.", "summary": "Me and longtime girlfriend break up on bad grounds, we have time apart and silence for 2 years, I want to break it and reconnect."}
{"id": "t3_aznpa", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Weird situation here... I'm trying to help out my friend and just need Reddit's opinion", "post": "Hey Reddit, I was wondering if you could help me out with this one.  \nSo, here's the story so far: I'm friends with a girl (she is a good friend of my girlfriend) who, from my point of view, is a bit in a rough spot right now. She is 28, came out of a rather long, serious relationship (that lasted for about 8 years) a couple of years ago and hasn't had anything serious going for her ever since (apart from the occasional fuck).\n  \nSo, about three weeks ago, she met this guy, who seemed like a regular bloke at first. They are both in their late 20s. So as things go, they started seeing each other quite often. She would sleep over at his place and he, in turns, would sleep over at hers.  \nThere is just one problem though: no fucking.  \n\nYou might say that this is not a problem as such, but you see, things are a bit weird. My friend has tried her best to initiate any kind of affectionate interaction. The closest was her grabbing his dick. He just laughed in return, said that he is a little bit tired and then they proceeded to hug each other and fall asleep (oh yeah they did make out once but did not proceed to sexual intercourse, since this bloke used the same excuse to \"get out of it\")  \nSo, despite them seeing each other every day, despite clear initiatives coming from her side, nothing has happened yet. Weirder yet, my friend has totally fallen for this guy. The bloke doesn't seem to show clear signs of affection. But why would he then continue to see her every other day? Am I just over-analyzing stuff? Its weird, it seems to me that this guy is actually afraid of sex or something of that sort...", "summary": "Friend is seeing a guy who absolutely (nonverbally) refuses to fuck her, despite clear initiative coming from the girls side. They continue seeing each other and the seems to be really falling for this guy... Your thoughts?  "}
{"id": "t3_x9d3c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why do men not back down after a girl states she is not interested?", "post": "Last night I was at the bar shooting pool, a Latin American man in his late-forties or early-fifties complimented me on a shot I had made by shaking my hand and giving me a kiss on the cheek. As a new pool player, and a few drinks deep, I deemed this to be a kind gesture, said thank you and continued on with my game.\n\nLater in the evening he approached me while I was waiting for the single bathroom to open up. He tried kissing me, I nicely told him I was not interested and in order to avoid what was turning into an awkward situation, held a conversation until the bathroom door opened up. After I left the bathroom, he was still in the hallway, called me beautiful, and I said something along the lines of \"That's sweet.  Have a good night\" and went back to meet up with my friends. \n\nOver the course of the night, there were 3 more interactions with this man similar to the one outside the bathroom. After the last time I decided to leave the bar since he was not getting the hint and was making me extremely uncomfortable. \n\nI can't explain how many times this happens to me. I'm a relatively attractive girl in my early 20s and am not a \"bitch.\" In other words, I don't like rudely telling a guy I'm not interested, nor do I feel like I should have to. I feel like it should be sufficient for me state that I'm not interested politely and that be it. \n\nso I'd really like to know why men tend to do this to women?? and is possible for me to turn down a guy nicely and not have the reoccurring, borderline harassing, attempts to be \"picked up\"?", "summary": "Politely declined a man hitting on me, he proceeded to creep me the fuck out for the rest of the night."}
{"id": "t3_1niol9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M21] want to break up with my girlfriend [F23]. I have met someone else, but am not sure if she feels the same way about me.", "post": "I have been with my current girlfriend for about a year and half. I honestly do love her and care about her.  However, we have done everything in this relationship wrong.  We start dating too early, had sex to early, moved in together WAY too early, etc. Everything has just been downhill after our initial \"honeymoon\" stage.\n\nI've been thinking about how to break up with her, since we live together. I honestly don't know how to do it.  She has nowhere to go.  She doesn't make enough money to live on her own, and we have recently moved to another city together (big mistake), so she doesnt have any friends that she could stay with, or even comfort her.\n\nOn the other hand, I am just transfered to a new school and immediately fell incredibly hard for this other girl. We spend lots of time together in and outside of class. To be honest, I have never met anyone like her, or felt this way about anyone (it sounds cliche, but its the honest truth). I want to try everything to get this girl.\n\nSo I guess my question to you guys is, how do I break up with my current girlfriend (whom I live with) and what to do about this new girl?", "summary": "How to break up with live-in girlfriend of a year and a half, and what to do about this girl I have met."}
{"id": "t3_4sxfzv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [20F] of eight months equates porn to infidelity, catches me [M24] watching it.", "post": "Hello,\n\nWhen we first got together, my sweet and lovely girlfriend told me loud and clear that she equated watching porn to infidelity and that she would break up with me if she ever caught me doing it.\n\nI admit straight away that I outright dismissed her message and continued watching porn on occasion; never when she was around and never on the expense of our sex life but behind her back and I often felt a twinge of shame. Yet, I kept on doing it.\n\nIt had to happen eventually. She discovered it yesterday and she has been devastated since then, sobbing uncontrollably for long bouts of time. Yet, she has also been kind, telling me how much she loves me and asking me rather than others for consolation (which I must say I feel very awkward about).\n\nImmediately after the revelation, I owned up, offering her to break up with me because I realized what a let-down I had been. She turned it down, saying that she would stay with me, but it will be over if I ever watch pornography again. Nor can I break up with her, seeing that she has personal issues where my support is extremely precious to her. Walking away could destroy her.\n\nThere's not much more to say. She and I go along together extremely well and I have to count myself lucky that she still wants to stay with me and I will have to work hard to win back her trust. Although I do think her equation between porn and infidelity is forced, I absolutely disregarded her warning and now I am paying the price. Still, I feel wretched, branded an adulterer and I fear that our future relationship will be entirely on her mercy. \n\nThere has been an incredible amount of anger and loathing over these past few days, but I now see that it is my responsibility to set things right. Still, should I just be completely meek in doing so or should I assert that, although I betrayed her trust, I haven't exactly killed anyone? \n\nI just want to hear your take. Is there something I have overlooked?", "summary": "Girlfriend equated porn to infidelity; I watched it anyway. Now I am essentially an adulterer. How to get both myself and relationship back on track?"}
{"id": "t3_2rhaib", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] with my Wife [30 F] of 15 years, are turning into a NSFW post.", "post": "I thought about doing this as a throw away but I never check those anyways. Back story I guess would be a good idea first. My wife and I met in high school and have been together ever since. We had our first child when I was 21. I've got an esteemed job finally two years ago. We're finally out of poverty and our three children. \n\nBetween the first and second child she admitted she was bi and we split for a while. She came back and we've fought the whole way. This year we had both felt beaten down and I found someone else. So I left. Granted I see and take care of my children every day. That is not the issue here, the issue is coming. \n\nSo things are hard. We're looking at one another and feeling the pain of the separation. We stick around one another to do family things and keep the kids happy. Then we start having sex again two months in but we still stay apart. \n\nOn the side she begins hitting up craigslist for men and women and gets hits. She'll go to work and on her lunch she'll fuck someone in the car and then never see them again. \n\nThis devastated me at first. I couldn't believe that she would beg me to come back, fuck me, and then have something on the side. But then I realized I had something on the side. So it go weird for a while and we didn't talk again. \n\nNow we're talking and having sex again, but now I make her tell me, as we are fucking what she did with those other men. And it is the best sex ever. Now we're thinking of letting her get fucked by other men and let me watch. \n\nThis is the kicker. It still hurts but I like it. \nWhat the fuck is wrong with me?\n\nAs a side note, the children are not aware that any of this goes on. I keep them happy safe. My children are first, I am second.", "summary": "Wife and I split. She sleeps around a lot. It hurt. Now it turns me on. I make her tell me what she did with those men. And I like it."}
{"id": "t3_4c2r8p", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Didn't file taxes in 2015. Not sure how to go about it this year.", "post": "So last year I wasn't able to file taxes.  Like I usually do, I used Tax Act to set up my taxes and ended up having to owe both state and federal (which usually happens, but for some reason it was more this year).  Some unfortunate things happened and I was never able to file and pay what I owed.   I never asked for an extension or anything, I basically just fucked up is what it comes down to.  So now this year, Im not really sure what to do.  I have no kids, been renting the same apartment for a few years, have a car payment, work two jobs (one part time) make about 40,000-45,000 a year; so my taxes shouldnt be to difficult.  Im just not sure what to do since I didn't file them last year.  Money situation is kind of tight right now and like I said I owe money to federal and state for the 2015 year.  Not really sure if I will owe this year (I shouldn't because I now know longer have a 1099-G from unemployment to file). \n\n Is there a way I can see If I'm getting a refund for this year so I can pay off what I owe last year?  Can a site like turbo tax or tax act help me in this situation (would they allow me to file taxes for previous year) or am I better off going to a tax place like H&R block.  Like I said money is tight so whatever would make the most financial sense would be great.  I looked in the wiki and searched in the search bar under this sub but couldnt really find anything to help me. Any insight would be great I'm off to work now so ill see your comments later tonight, Thank You.", "summary": "didn't file taxes in 2015 (owe money to state and federal), now its time to file my taxes in 2016 and I'm not sure what to do\u2026and of course, money is tight right now"}
{"id": "t3_1joj8r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (22/M) feel like my relationship with my girlfriend (19/F) of 8 months is falling apart because of the LSAT", "post": "Basically, I just can't see my girlfriend as much because I have a full-time job and I'm currently studying for LSATs. It's gotten to the point where we had to talk about seeing each other more because she wants to see me more but with the LSATs coming up, I just can't go out as much and it's really hard for both of us. She understands what I'm going through, but at the same time, since she's still in college, she says that she can't understand from experience and I really feel like this is why my relationship feels extremely strained right now. I'm even considering going on a break for a month in September since I'm basically going to just study and just telling her she can do whatever she wants and just not tell me about any guys, but then I thought about how that would just be another thing for me to worry about.\n\nAnyone go through this and have some advice at what I can do to make her happy while I'm preoccupied with this test?", "summary": "My relationship feels like it's falling apart because of the LSAT since I can't see my girlfriend as often as I would like. How do I keep my relationship going strong while studying for this test?"}
{"id": "t3_25t3x6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [17 F] friend is dating a [46 M], help!", "post": "I think the title says it all, but I figure I should give some background all the same. I met this girl when I was 17 and she was 13, and we developed a sort of big sister/little sister relationship. She was badly abused as a child, absentee father, but also incredibly bright and precocious. We spent a lot of time talking activism, debate (we were both on the team in our high school) and her life in high school while I was a couple hours away at college. \n\nOver the last year or so we've drifted, but I've reconnected with her a bit as I'm back in my hometown for the summer. She mentioned that she'd been seeing someone new, but I didn't have a chance to ask her too much. We both follow each other on tumblr, and the other day she posted a very explicit paragraph about going to her 'boyfriend's' house, where they'd had sex for a long time and hung out. His age (46) is on there. Naturally my big sister instincts kicked in right away, but I have no idea how to approach the issue. The kicker is this: in our state, the age of consent _is_ 17. \n\nUltimately, I don't know if I'm going to be shut down for this. Can anything be done? Even if it's technically legal, it seems so predatory I'd feel complicit if I did nothing. Thanks everyone for your time!", "summary": "My old friend 17 F has announced publicly that she is dating a 46 y/o man. As creepy as it is, the age of consent is 17 in my state. Can anything be done?"}
{"id": "t3_2ds5u8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] after a long relationship with her [16 F](Friends), decided to go further and try something with her, fail...", "post": "So after a long relationship with my friend, she kinda \"Friendzoned\" me, but i really like her, i just tell her about it but she got mad and really sad, because that would mean the end of the nice relationship we have, she already said no, whats the move now? keep trying? or just go away from her?, i just feel shit when im with her, but she does not feel the same for me, and i just think the better choice here could be to go away from her a little bit\n*English not my native language, sorry if i made some mistakes.\nCome the downvotes!", "summary": "I talked with my friend about how much i love her, and that i would like to have a romantic relationship with her, she didn't take that  really good, shes mad and sad, so do i."}
{"id": "t3_sqq01", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "3 and a half year relationship on brink of disaster.", "post": "Hey everyone, first poster here, but coming to you as its the only place that I know that can help me really, so on with the show.\n\nI am male and in a 3 and a half year relationship with a female, we are both 19 seperated by a couple of moths,, and currently living in uni. We live in seperate flats at the moment, but beofr this we virtually lived in the same flat (1 room with a bathroom), I know this probably didnt help the situation.\n\nOur relationship has had some problems in the past with her being paranoid about other people, and that lasted about 6 months before finally everything was sorted out through the help of a counsiler and self help books. We were ok for a while, spendng a lot of time together and everything going fine, until recently things took a down turn.\n\nI have become the slightest bit paranoid with male friends, because it seems that suddendll her only outlook is towards friends, with her only ever talking about friends, and always seemingly to be on her phone. Our relationship is neglected, we barley spend \"quality\" time with each other (activities, films, ect.) and sex is completely out of the window, being 1-2 months bewteen it. I have moved back out into my own flat by a joint choice, as we feel the room apart will help us become us again. We do talk about it and she feels like she has done wrong in the relationship not being able to forgive her self with the paranoia at the start of our relations, or how she shouts and swears during conversations and discussions.\n\nAs well as this her familty has had a few problems, with only yesterday her dad having a heart attack, and her mum finding out he cheater on her a few months ago.\n\nSo here is the question /r/, how would i go about fixing this relationship and are we on the right lines to doing this?", "summary": "relationship has paranoia, gf not forgiving herself about small petty things in the relationship, we have spent to much time together and are arguing, how would we go about fixing it?"}
{"id": "t3_3cafty", "subreddit": "college", "title": "I'm considering switching my major from English Education to Music Industry", "post": "My University is small, so the Music Industry major is simply a combination of a Music Business and Music Technology. I'm a Sophomore (36 Credits) and I still have a little bit of time to change my schedule before the summer ends. I've been thinking about changing my major from English Education to Music Industry essentially since I discovered that that was a major. I've always had a passion for working with people younger than me and for reading and writing and general English things, and to be quite honest, I'm very good at it - to the point where those classes are too easy for me. However, my main reason for truly becoming a teacher is because I've never had a good English teacher, and I want to put more good English teachers into the world. But then I joined a Music Fraternity; and on my campus, my Fraternity is in charge of all things Sound related - at least Technology-wise. And we essentially \"run\" two out of three variety shows a year, and while I was working these I found myself absolutely mesmorized by working sound and running wires and equipment and everything else. I especially enjoyed the seemingly mind-numbing task of running XLRs along the stage, simply because I didn't really have the know-how to do anything else. But honestly I was so interested in learning more and I just had such a good time running these shows that I'm worried about how much I'd actually enjoy teaching.\n\nIf it helps, I worked out a three-year plan, and I'll graduate on time - assuming I take the Business courses (about four of them) and my Internship (Four Credits) over next Summer. \n\nSo essentially, what should I do? Should I change majors? Or should I stay in my English major?", "summary": "I wanna change majors from English Ed to Music Industry. I'm worried I won't like teaching, because Music was way more fun, but is that a good-enough reason?"}
{"id": "t3_2xoeb1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 F] dont know if a friend [24 M] is worth the effort anymore?", "post": "I have a \"friend\" who has always mistreated me. He constantly pointed out my flaws, mocked me when others complimented me, and just generally has not provided a supportive friendship. I have always tolerated his actions, mostly because I feel as though this was his socially awkward way of developing some sort of friendship with me. He supposedly has been like this with many other people, but only to me in our current friends circle.\n\nI, on the hand, think I have put a lot of effort in being nice back to him despite everything. I have tolerated his unnecessarily mean comments (though I now and then mention that I think he is mean to me), hoping that our friendship would develop into a better one over time. There are some times now and then when he and I get along very well, but it returns to the usual in the couple days.\n\nI thought that our friendship was improving a lot, however recently he acted in a way that I found very insulting. I felt as though he had not respected me as a person and, to an extent, used me. To be honest, I am now unsure of whether he ever valued me as a friend like I thought of him. \n\nThis friendship has a taken a lot out of me over a long time, and now I am uncertain whether I should just give up and kick him out of my life or try to mend it and keep going. I am pretty sure he knows that I have been acting differently (trying to stay away from him), but I also know that he would never take action to see if I was ok. It would have to be me who goes and pours out my heart to him, and hope that he had actually cared for me as friend like I did. \n\nWhat should I do? Is a person like this worth it? I had always hoped that we would become good friends, but if it's a relationship like this, I just end up feeling pathetic. \n\nWould appreciate any advice.", "summary": "Asshole friend who's never treated me great was an even greater asshole recently. Should I keep trying to be his friend or move on?"}
{"id": "t3_2t44fk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Can I [17 M] please get some motivation and a boost back to being myself again", "post": "I've been pretty depressed after being rejected by a girl who sort of led me on and realized I wasn't her type. I guess since she said she was \"busy\" with school and things were getting worse. But she was letting me down easy. Before you guys say \"Just let it go, man\", it's as easy as you think, but I'm not much of a social person. I can't just randomly approach someone and start asking them out and flirting with them. It takes me some time to get back on my feet. I've lost a lot of self esteem and just been really sad because I still like the girl a lot.", "summary": "I need some motivation and self-esteem boost to get back to my normal self again after facing an emotional rejection. It's been a month now."}
{"id": "t3_2bxz5f", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "My Son has Medicaid from Washington but my Local Hospital Will Not Use It, What Do I Do?", "post": "I recently had my two sons over to visit this summer (I am divorced from their mother). While they were here, one of them had to have an emergency CT. It turned out to be nothing, and the ER trip was only about 90 minutes total, so I was relieved.\n\nAfter they left received 3 separate bills from 3 separate entities that allegedly provided service, totaling 3200 dollars. My son has Medicaid from his state of origin, Washington. I gave them his insurance when we walked in.\n\nI live in Idaho.  Every person I talk to regarding these bills says \"we have no contract with Washington and we aren't a contracted provider anyway, so it's not going to fly.\"  When I contacted Washington's DSHS, they told me they \"don't cover anything that happens outside of the state of Washington.\"  Like, if someone's traveling or with their Dad in another adjacent state, they're just out of luck.\n\nI don't have 3200 dollars. I can't even afford to make monthly payments on this, I am still making monthly payments on my own medical shit from years ago, and I save up all year to take my sons in the summer.\n\nIt makes no sense to me that someone could be poor enough to need Medicaid, but a hospital could feel like I could just pay 3000 dollars.", "summary": "son has medicaid, hospitals won't use this insurance, Washington state won't pay it. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1qgah0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my \"friend\" [18F] ( Duration 5 years on and off..and on ):have started talking a little again bit now, however not sure if I am overreacting? Need opinions", "post": "Keep in mind; when I say ' talk ' it usually means through the phone via messaging etc.\n\nA few years back - we dated for like 3 months and things didn't work out well between us ( well for her ). I was really hurt but I moved on trying to get over what had happened between us. However I don't know what my past self was thinking and we ended up becoming friends instead of strangers. This lasted for 3 years.\n\nJust last year - I lost my shit and we got into a huge fight which basically started from her not replying as fast as she used to, it was stupid and I regret it tremendously because since then we have not talked much, like none at all. Which leads us onto this week.\n\nIt just came as a shock when she called up through her phone crying because her pet had died ( like on a Thursday night last week )and as a good Samaritan, I comforted her. Then all of a sudden boom ; we're talking again - like \"friends\". Why did I put quotation marks? Basically \"something\" feels weird between us - I feel as though I'm only there because she needs comfort and someone to talk to after school, but at the same time I feel like she wants to repair the relationship that was broken. I would also like to mention the conversation we have is 'dry' - we don't have much to talk about really.\n\nDon't get me wrong, she's a lovely, modest person and all but sometimes you cannot really help to wonder if she's putting on a facades to get what she want. I'm saying this because earlier she asked me to mind her folder until we had the next class ( which was during lunch breaks ) as she did not bring her bag to school since she finishes early. Am I being paranoid? When the past few months I swear we have been avoiding each other like the plague!\n\nWhat do you guys think? Is she manipulating me or is she trying to fix our relationship?", "summary": "Friend stops talking after an argument. Decides to start talking again after a tragic event. I'm lost whether I'm a rebound for her or if she's trying to get close to me as a friend once again?"}
{"id": "t3_3o6njp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my gf [21 F] month and half, getting used to being in a relationship", "post": "Hey /r/relationships,\n\nHere is my situation, I have recently entered a relationship for the first time since high school (some might say my first ever).  After being single for basically my entire life I am kind of having trouble getting out of the single mindset.\n\nI really like my girlfriend, she has similar interests, very attractive, good major in college, the sex is really good, and we laugh a lot.  Still with all of this I find myself taken aback when I realize I can't pursue other girls.\n\nI haven't had any slips so far, and I am trying really hard to not view other girls in a sexual way, but it can be quite hard when they start flirting with me.\n\nSo my question is, how can I work towards being comfortable being in a relationship?  I want to give this thing my best shot, since I think we are really good together.\n\nThanks!\nfiscal_tiger", "summary": "Recently starting dating for the first time, and I am having trouble adjusting to the new relationship lifestyle.  Any advice to ease the process is appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_2a7e3i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] of 2 years, issues after moving in together.", "post": "So me and my boyfriend have been living together for about 4 months. We live with my daughter and we are both employed full time.\n \n\nHe is a good person and I love him, he gets along well with my 5 year old daughter. He is hard working, driven, and independent which are traits I value in a person. \n\nI'll get straight to the point and say we have had problems ever since moving in together. It started out as what I viewed as strange quirks and now his behavior has actually started offending me. \n\nI moved in to his home so naturally all of his things were here. I barely brought anything from my parents house. I brought one picture I wanted to hang and he was so weird about it. He said he didn't like the picture so it just sat on the floor for a couple months until I finally just hung it up. I just feel so uncomfortable/unwelcome in what is supposed to be my home. \n\nI cook, clean, and do all the grocery shopping/meal planning, most of the laundry and I pay half (I don't think he has cleaned the bathroom once since I've been here) on top of taking care of my daughter and working a full time job. If I don't do it the mess just stays there. I've told him about this, he says he will do it and help out but doesn't deliver.\n\nHe constantly wants to hang out with friends. We will go on a \"date\" and then almost immediately after he wants to make plans with friends. He invites me but sometimes it just gets old. I would like to hang out with him alone for a night for once but he always has to be drinking and getting rowdy. I've addressed this issue and he just says he doesn't want to do those things. I'm adventurous and like to explore and try new things sometimes that don't involve drinking and he is just so negative towards my ideas and doesn't help to make them happen.", "summary": "Boyfriend is very aloof about relationship. He's not great but he's not terrible either./ Is it worth it to stay? I have all the bad things that come along with living with a partner but none of the perks."}
{"id": "t3_21e7by", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Don't get an MIS major.", "post": "Is there anything I can do as a recent graduate in Management Information Systems? Literally every job in any related field requires 2-10 years experience. How do I get this experience? Do I need to go to experience land and ask the experience fairy? It's been frustrating, in a Catch-22 kind of way. You don't get experience because you can't get a job, you can't get a job because you don't have experience. I'm sure I'm not the only one that is frustrated by this. I got an ok job straight out of college, but it's not even remotely close to the field I wanna be in. It's basically debt collections, and it barely pays enough for me to pay my own bills.\n\nI've yet to find the answer to what job I can get if I want to eventually be a (blank) Analyst. (blank) meaning business, data, systems, business data systems. Whatever they want to call it. There's no path. There's no direction. You either have 2-10 years experience or you don't.\n\nAnd don't even get me started on the requirements. Might as well stop looking if you can't code 10 different languages from scratch on 6 different machines. One required that you know all that, and speak English, Spanish and Portuguese. Fuck me.", "summary": "how do I get experience in my  field? Or should I find a new field? I think I'm finally disillusioned. Sorry about the rant."}
{"id": "t3_419uhu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[32 M] moves from Hawai'i to Boston and now seeking help to rekindle an old flame [32 F]. How to avoid friend zone?", "post": "bottom-line up front: [32 M] moved cross-country to be closer to [32 F] long-time best friend and ex-gf. We love each other very much, but there's little romance. Need advice.\n\nMy girlfriend and I (32 F and 32 M, respectively) have known each other for a little over 10 years. We dated for 4 years when I started grad school including 3 years of a long-distance relationship (Hawai'i to Boston; major distance and time zone difference). She broke things off with me citing long-distance as the main issue, but we continued to talk frequently. We'd continue to see each other in person 1-3x per year, sometimes romantically. It's always been very easy for us to get along, and we never had any real fights.\n\nYada yada 5 years go by, I finish my Ph.D. and move from Hawai'i to Boston hoping to rekindle things. She graciously let's me move into her small apartment while I hunt for jobs (and maybe my own place?) We're suddenly playing house like an old married couple, cuddling, holding hands, dinner dates, etc. just nothing hot-and-sweaty romantic. She isn't interested in my advances. She doesn't like to talk about the issue, but says she just doesn't feel attracted to me in that sense right now.\n\nShe tells me she loves me very much, and I definitely share the sentiment. We've gotten to know each other very well over many years. She's my best friend, and I'm fairly certain she could be my future wife. We've talked about long-term plans and raising kids together, but it seems like the old spark is gone. I feel like her husband but not her lover.\n\nI'm worried I'm headed down the road to platonic cuddle-buddy friend zone or old married couple /r/deadbeadrooms.\n\nHow do I save my relationship? How do I rekindle the old spark and fix the broken romantic or intimate issues?\n\nThanks all.", "summary": "Trying to restart romantic relationship with long-term best friend and ex-gf. We love each other, but lacking intimacy and romance. Please help!"}
{"id": "t3_1u6q14", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Having problems with school(college), I don't know what to do.", "post": "So,i'll start of with saying i am fortunate to have everything given to me. My parents have always taken care of everything i ever needed. The problems starting coming up when I was done with community college. Up until last year (fall 2013) everything was going amazingly. Then I applied to my local university and I ran into a problem. I was 3 units shy because one my courses was remedial. I did not know this when i initially applied. I was not informed of their decision until after summer 2013 was done.(this is important)\n\nI get rejected and I decided to apply to spring 2014 for the university while taking a course during fall 2013 at my community college. I pass the course with a B and i receive my units. Unfortunately the university tells me, they don't accept grades from fall 2013 for spring 2014. they only accept them from summer 2013. So here i am, rejected again, and I can't apply to fall 2014 because the school has closed registrations for it. So once again i have failed to get in, but now it will be postponed even more.\n\nI don't know what to do. I am being threatened to be kicked out if i don't attend that school, i am stressing out because where i live, (San Jose California, rent is extremely expensive and full time jobs are almost non existent.(without a degree). If i get kicked out I have never had a responsibility before in my life that involved money.(I.E RENT, bills) I currently have a part time job that i have asked for full time but will not give it to me.\nI really need help, i am stressing and I feel like I've ruined all my opportunities.", "summary": "I messed up all my chances, now i am about to get kicked out in a city that is pretty cutthroat."}
{"id": "t3_x4421", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Should I feel bad about this?", "post": "So I participated in Arbitrary day 2012 this year and the day I got my mach I was already picking things out. She was interested in a couple authors so I went on ebay and got got 5 books from one author. I threw in some candy and a Zimbabwe 100,000,000,000,000 dollar bill as a bookmark. I wanted something else though so I went back to ebay and got another book from one of the authors she listed and it was a signed copy. The thing is that the seller took forever to send it out. I believe the whole event ended on the 16th and the book was delivered on the 14th and I was on vacation so it all got sent out around the 18th. The box cost around $15 bring the cost of the entire gift to about $65. I waited and waited and nothing happened. No message from the giftee, no pictures of the books on redditgifts.com, nothing. I look at the tracking ID I posted and turns out it was missing a number, fixed that and got on USPS.com to see what's up. It says it was delivered but nobody was home so it was stuck at the post office. I sent a message and said sorry a few times then told her what she can do to get it. Nothing. No reply. I waited a few days and sent another message. No reply. In a couple days the post office is going to send it back to me. Should I feel bad for this as most of it was out of my hands?", "summary": "Sent a nice gift. Stuck at post office and no communication with giftee. The gift will be sent back if she does not pick it up."}
{"id": "t3_kywb2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex turned down a job opportunity because of me...", "post": "My ex and I dated on and off for about a year and 8 months. We were 18F (me) and 20M (him) when we met. Anyway, we broke up once, ended up getting back together, and then broke up again. We tried the friends thing for a while and then things got to a point where it was going to be us \"being together\" while we were both on breaks from college and then \"being friends\" while we were at our respective schools. It got messy when he started dating this other girl and I could tell she was getting feelings for him and he didn't care about her, so I told him that it wasn't fair to other people and that he couldn't have both situations (me at home, her at school).\n\n I told him that we could not contact each other for a certain amount of time. It's only been half of that time, but apparently he is taking the timeframe very seriously. (I'm really close with his sister, who is my age. She and I talked about this one night when I asked if he was moving on, which is what I want him to do). He was looking at possible jobs after he graduated over the summer and refused to apply for certain jobs or accept offers because they were out of state and farther away from me and he didn't want to move anywhere where it would put a strain on us getting back together.\n\nI feel horrible knowing that he might turn down his potential dream job with some company just because he hopes we can get back together after that timeframe if up. How do I make sure he doesn't do something stupid like that without breaking the no contact rule I put in place? Is there anything else I can do to kind of help him?\n\nAt this point he's 23M and I'll be 21 soon. I might not stay in state for grad school (if I go) or if I get a job that requires me to move and I don't think he understands that idea.", "summary": "no contact rule for a certain amount of time with my ex, but he is possibly turning down jobs out of state in case we get back together after said timeframe is up."}
{"id": "t3_hsuwc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I 'wake up' my boyfriend? I love him so much, but I feel like I'm just not happy anymore.", "post": "me20f/him21m. Together a year and a half, live separately.\n\nThings were amazing at the start. He made all the effort to make me happy, initiated almost all contact, basically never made me forget I was loved.\n\nNow, he is too comfortable in this relationship. I honestly feel taken for granted. He hasn't got his licence, (is getting it in a month) so I'm always the one driving, I cook dinner for him occassionally, buy him little things, tell him how I feel about him. He doesn't do any little things for me anymore.\n\n(About the licence thing, I know it's stupid but I'm already getting upset about thinking about when he gets it... I'm absolutely convinced he will not do the amount of driving I have done for him. I get this sick feeling in my stomach knowing that I'd still be the one to go to him:( )\n\nI don't want gifts or shit like that, I just want to feel appreciated and loved =( I'm tearing up now as I'm writing this... I love this kid so much. I know that he loves me, but he doesn't SHOW it anymore.\n\nHe said he'd take me to a jazz club. Never did. Said he'd take me to watch my favourite comedian. Never did. Hardly attends any of my family functions anymore simple cause he can't be bothered (He knows family stuff is important to me). I just feel like he does not make an effort anymore.\n\nI don't want to break up with him, but I won't lie, I have considered it so much lately. Just because I feel so fucking unhappy over these little things. I feel miserable. And also stupid, because as soon as we are together we are amazing. Truly. And I think I'm overexaggerating. All these doubts and fights always arise when we're apart. I hate this feeling :(\n\nHow can I wake him up? Get him to appreciate me and show me he loves me like he used to? :( I'm sick of being the boyfriend in this relationship. I want to feel like the girl he'd do anything for again. =(", "summary": "Just want to know if you think I'm expecting too much out of this relationship? I want him to wake up and show me he loves me before it's too late. But how?"}
{"id": "t3_3f6lh9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21m] with girlfriend [19] of 5 and 1/2 years - Cheated on me after drinking too much and taking drugs. Already decided to try make things work.", "post": "Title explains the situation pretty well. I've already decided that I want to try make things work. For a variety of reasons that aren't important for the question I'm asking. I know I will see soon enough whether my decision was right/wrong. \n\nIs it possible for it to work? I feel like a lot of people would break up as soon as they found out. But I'm just looking for some examples or outside perspective. The popular opinion is that it can't, and I understand that. But is their examples of it working out for the better? Is it possible that it was a one time thing that was fueled by drugs and drink? (I guess I should say that she has said that she will never take drugs again and that she doesn't go out with those people anymore).\n\nTime will prove whether I was right/wrong but I guess I'm looking for a little hope.", "summary": "Girlfriend cheated after drinking a lot and ending up taking drugs. I've decided to give her a second change. Is it possible I made the right decision?"}
{"id": "t3_2bhvbi", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18 f] My boyfriend[18m] is moving away for college", "post": "Hey everyone. So my boyfriend and I have been dating since junior year of high school (so abut two years now). We had some vague plans to go to the same college in our hometown but he didn't make it in, so he's going to a school 8 hours away and I will be staying here (but living in dorms). The point is, he's too far away and because we are both very jealous (and sexually active) people, it's not feasible for us to continue our relationship long-distance.\n\nSo now I just have to get over him, right? But it's been hard. On one hand, I want to be \"over\" him and feeling good by the time school comes around (October) so that I can make new friends and focus on academics.\n\nBut the problem is, I'm leaving to go to my home country for one month (all of August). I figured that would be the best time to get over him, but we still have almost all of September before school starts. He and I both want to try to enjoy all the time we have left together, but is it really smart of us to kind of \"hold on\" for the month I'll be gone and then churn out the rest of our temporary relationship? \n\nI've been with him so long, and even now it feels weird and totally sucks that it's ending forever soon. But I still really love hanging out with him and probably wouldn't hang out with many people before college starts, anyways. \n\nI guess my request for advice is: what should my next course of action be? Should we break up and distance ourselves now, or should be try to hold on until summer ends? I know that breaking up will hurt me for quite some time so maybe I could use a month or two as a time cushion.\n\nReally hope this stuff makes sense and I appreciate this community. thanks", "summary": "Boyfriend and I are splitting up for college, I don't know if we should split before school starts so we can get over it or wait until summer ends"}
{"id": "t3_105nd5", "subreddit": "college", "title": "NEED ADVICE: Have a friend who was supposed to graduate with associate's degree but our high school fucked her over.", "post": "I have a friend who is in all college-level classes and is supposed to graduate with an Associate's degree. However, the counselor who is supposed to deal only with students who are graduating with their A.D. somehow managed to give her college-level classes but claim she cannot get her A.D. and can only obtain a general degree. That means that the sixty-two college credits she has earned are pointless. \n\nShe is interested in knowing if she should drop the rest of her classes except for the two required senior classes. Or, should she keep them and graduate with a general degree and have sixty-two college credits to start college with. Dropping the classes will mean that her transcripts have 'withdrawn' on them and that might make her look bad to future .\n\nShe is simply interested in getting advice on the situation because it pretty much sucks that the last four years might end up being worthless.", "summary": "School dicked over a friend and waited until five weeks into the school year to tell her. What should she do?"}
{"id": "t3_3hd7re", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by asking our my best friend of 10 years", "post": "So, the actual thing happened about 2 weeks ago on my birthday but I currently don't know what to do.\n\nI've had a small crush on her for about 3 years now, but never wanted to risk messing anything up between us.\n\nSo it was my birthday and she called me and asked if I wanted to spend the day out with her, having nothing better to do I say yes. It started out with us going to the park and walking around for about 2 hours, then we went and watched a movie, and afterward we were hungry. We decided to go get some food, after about 10 minutes of talking and laughing at the restaurant table... I don't know what clicked in my head, but I decided to ask her out on an actual date...\n\nThe words escape my mouth \"Hey, uh, do you want to go out with me?\" \n\nShe starts crying... She got up and ran out... And while doing so, she accidentally slammed the table and I got a crotch full of ice cold water...\n\nI haven't heard from her since... Won't respond to my calls or texts... And school started back today and she avoided me like the plague... I don't know how to face her...", "summary": "asked best friend out, she ran out, accidentally hitting the table and leaving me with a crotch full of ice water, she's now ignoring/avoiding me."}
{"id": "t3_2890aj", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Trouble opening fingers after making a fist.", "post": "Hey, /r/askdocs I've had this small problem for a while. I have trouble opening my fingers after making a fist.\n I'm a 20 year old female. \n\nI never paid much attention to it as it doesn't happen very often. I can't say whether it occurs in both hands as I never gave it much thought. \n\nI squeeze my hand, as of now my left, and when I try to open it, it slowly opens. I have no pain or tingling, but I have this week feeling though, and it mainly occurs in my middle finger. I looked up trigger finger already not sure it applies as I have no pain. \n\nJust wanted some thoughts on what it might be and whether I should bring it up to my doctor.", "summary": "My middle finger opens slower than the rest of my fingers when I make a fist and open it. No pain or tingling, just a weak feeling."}
{"id": "t3_3lu4x9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] need to get over a girl [24 F], need your help reddit", "post": "There's this girl I like and I'm pretty sure she doesn't feel the same way about me.\n\nWe used to work together and about a week ago she took a job in a city thats 300 miles away. We still talk/text everyday and she's says she misses me a lot, but this is more in \"friend\" way.\n\nNow here's the sad part. I can't stop thinking about her, I can't focus on anything. Its just her I think about all day. This has begun to affect my productivity and I'm sad most of the times.\n\nI know some of you'll are going to suggest to cut off all contact with her, but that's something I really can't do right now. At least for the next few weeks until she's gonna find new freinds cause she keeps calling/texting me every now and then.\n\nI need your help reddit, please.", "summary": "I like this girl and I'm pretty sure she doesn't feel the same way about me. Need to get over her."}
{"id": "t3_xhmv2", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "What do I do now?", "post": "I (F 19) have been friends with a guy (Guy 20) for a while. After my ex and I broke up a few months ago, Me and this guy started hanging out in groups a lot. The past 3 weeks we've hung out everyday, with other people and by ourselves. I've slept over his place (No sex, messing around, or anything) Just cuddling. The other day, we messed around and he fingered me. He told me that he had feelings for me, but i said i wasn't sure if i felt the same way, and i wanted to feel things out, (we're moving over an hour away from each other in a month). I've been on vacation for a week. I miss seeing him a lot, and I really think I have feelings for him. Earlier, he was saying how much he missed me and couldn't wait for me to be back.  Over a 2 hour skype date last night, I told him that I liked him. Since we ended our conversation, he's been really distant, and we usually text all day, but today we barely talked. He said he wanted a nap around 5, and I haven't heard from him since. What do I do now?", "summary": "I hung out with this guy a lot, he said he likes me, I go on vacation, realize i miss him & like him back, I tell him, now he doesn't want to talk."}
{"id": "t3_1mpxoa", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How am I going to do this?", "post": "I [19M]  just moved for College and everything is new to me, new people, new environment and new situation. I met a beautiful Korean girl [18~19 years old], beautiful and just perfect. \n\nI talked to her but I noticed that her English isn't that well and self-conscious (shyness maybe?), the conversation was kinda awkward because she would speak in a really quiet voice and not really understand much... \n\nI told her that I would like to have lunch with her someday but don't think she got that... Usually, I'll get flirty and give light touches but the conversation wasn't too well since she didn't get much on what I was saying so I ended it with \"Nice to meet you, I'm hungry so I'm going to get lunch\".\n\nAnyone would like to comment or help me a bit here? \n\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "Met a girl who cannot understand English and maybe shy, would like to get to know her better (go on a date)."}
{"id": "t3_3sznk7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [18 F] of one year are completely naive on how to deal with the stresses of a long distance relationship", "post": "We've been dating for about a year and a half now, having started in high school, and now we're in college. We ended up going to different colleges, and with that came the stress of a long distance relationship. She is and was my first and only girlfriend, and aside from a short middle school fling, I'm her only boyfriend. On to the problem-\n\nWe both feel that we're 'growing apart'. Over the time from when we started college we've been able to visit each other for a weekend here and there, but never long term. This wouldn't really be that bad, considering when we first started dating we only saw each other for a short time during the week; we mostly communicated through an instant messenger. However, I think that the distance and different circumstances have highlighted a glaring fact- we really don't have all that much in common. When we were in highschool, we could hide this by talking about classes and the like, but now that we don't have any classes, teachers, or experiences in common, our chatting has dried to just about nil.\n\nI am quite the extrovert and can't stand staying inside for a whole day, whereas she is quite introverted and wouldn't mind spending a day in bed doing nothing. I have an array of hobbies (not the least of which is dicking around on this website :P), whereas she tends to try something a bit on my suggestion, and quickly decide it's not for her, and go back to her pastime of rewatching TV shows she's already seen. \n\nI enjoy being around her, and going on dates is enjoyable. We don't have any 'dramatic' issues, and haven't had any fights in the time we've been together. But I think that deep down we are sort of seeing that that might just be a byproduct of the fact that we don't have much at all in common to have any sort of passionate argument about.", "summary": "Girlfriend of 1.5 years and I feel like we are growing apart- is it just a normal feeling caused by a long-distance relationship, or is it a sign that we aren't meant to be long-term?"}
{"id": "t3_2czya5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my [28 M] boyfriend of 6 months - I'm ashamed of my body-impedes sex life", "post": "Throwaway because this is embarrassing. I've always had bad skin, and although my body acne is significantly better than it was as a teen, I still have breakouts and scars from prior acne on my chest, arms, back, neck and butt. I am very careful with what I wear (never anything shorter than short sleeves or open back, and NEVER any kind of bathing suit). I have a regimen to improve my skin, but the scarring is actually worse than the zits themselves - it makes my whole body look spotty and gross!\n\nAnyways, because of this, I have always been EXTREMELY self-conscious of my body. Additionally, while I have lost weight, I am still somewhat flabby (skinny-fat, if you will), and I can only have sex with my BF in the dark when I am drunk (and when I'm sure he's had some alcohol as well... I guess so maybe he won't notice my body).\n\nWe are going on a beach vacation with his family this fall and I'm terrified. I wouldn't be caught DEAD in a bikini and I feel like a weirdo if I try to come up with an explanation as to why I won't wear one around anyone.\n\nLong story short, I don't know if he's noticed the severity of my body issues, but I never let him see me naked in the light of day or sober.\n\nAnyone else have similar experiences/suggestions?", "summary": "I have body issues (body acne/scarring and weight issues) that prevent me from having a normal life without shame and prevent me from having a better ex life with my BF."}
{"id": "t3_2lznn3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20 M] girlfriend [22 F] of eleven months, has been depressed and stressed lately. Her ex also recently tried to break us up.", "post": "My girlfriend has been working really long retail shifts for the last two months and she's been getting extremely stressed out from it. She's been crying in my arms some nights because of it. Her ex also recently tried contacting her to get her to break up with me, but she told him to leave us alone and stayed with me.\n\nI feel like she's been disconnected lately.  Messages I send her usually get a one-word reply.  She doesn't have the same passion for food or games like she used to.  Whenever I spend time with her in-person, she acts like she used to, but I think that she's hurting from the weight of all of these things in her life.\n\nI've been depressed before in my life and I can see the same things going on with her that were going on with me.  I just wish I knew what to do other than be here for her. \nI really want her to be happy, and I've tried to help.  I've gotten her candy, flowers, all of the cliche stuff, listened to everything she has to say, spent time with her together going out on dates and dinners, lunches, etc.\n\nI always try and be there for her emotionally.  I let her know that I love her and that she can always talk to me about how she feels.  She says that I'm the best boyfriend she's ever had.\n\nShe knows that she wants to be a background artist for a video game company, but she can't get a good student loan to go back to school.  She's been really worried about not wanting to end up in a dead-end job forever.  \n\nI think she's really talented and she could go far, but I don't know how to help her with that.  I've showed her some indie projects she could submit ideas to get her started down that path, but so much of her time is taken up by work.", "summary": "I think that my girlfriend is going through depression.  What can I do to help her through it and break her out of the depression?"}
{"id": "t3_1p2pdj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO [27/F] has a lack of communication with me [28/M], it's been mentioned before.", "post": "So, today I tried to plan a night with my SO (of 1+ year), and she tells me she has all sorts of errands to run.  I usually go to the gym on Tuesday, but since I had to pick her up from the Greyhound station last night, she assumed I was going tonight.  She didn't tell me last night that she had made appointments for tonight, or else I would've grabbed my gym bag.  I did in fact tell her last night that I wasn't going to the gym.\n\nThis particular situation is not a big deal, I can just hang out at her place until she's done.  What IS a big deal, is that last week we had an argument about her total lack of communication.  I even said these exact words: \"for the love of everything that's good in this world, please, please, please try to communicated better!\"  I repeated that at different times until I was blue in the face.  Also, it's worth mentioning that I brought it up in a lighter sense a couple weeks before that.\n\nI love her to death, but sometimes I feel like I have to be a psychic and it's gnawing away at all the good stuff.  Communication is one of the most important aspects of any relationship, and, though she seems to know that, she doesn't quite know HOW to effectively communicate.  Any advice on how to talk to her constructively?", "summary": "SO has a hard time communicating effectively.  We've talked about it/argued about it before, and it hasn't improved."}
{"id": "t3_1o8nrg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 22M with my 22 F girlfriend, 6m, she has a friend who wants something serious, but she doesn't want to", "post": "We've been dating for a couple of months. I like her SO much and she tells me the same.\n\nFlashback - She has a friend, who doesn't live in my country, who wants something with her, but she doesn't want to. In fact, he already told her his feeling for her, but she only sees him as a friend (This happened when she was with her ex, last year)\n\nHe told her when she were single, they should hook up. She told him she wasn't interested. They kept talking, she met me, we start dating. Somehow he knows about it, he reclaims her that he asked her to hook up when she were single.\n\nFlashforward - He came to the country to try again with her, even when she told him she wasn't interested. Now, she just told me she was having \"mixed feelings about her situation and our situation, but not about her feelings for me, because she is sure she loves me so much\". And she needs to talk to me. I'm scared of losing her, and I like her SO much.", "summary": "Friend of GF wants something with her, she doesn't want to. Now she has mixed feelings for her situation but not for her feelings for me."}
{"id": "t3_xzglp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(M/19) am trying to pick up this girl(F/18) that comes into the coffee shop that I work at it.", "post": "She's one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen, she comes in kind of frequently, sometimes with her friends, and sometimes by herself. A couple days ago I saw her by herself and I was working the espresso machine and made her a drink and put a heart in it with latte art. She thanked me, smiled, and when I went back to work I saw her take a picture of it and text text text, looking back at me quite frequently and smiling.\n\nNow, when she left I was off the clock and talking to one of my co-workers, but on her way out she kind of motioned towards me like she was going to come talk to me, but she kind of backed away and left, I told her to have a good day and we both smiled at each other.\n\nSo reddit, what was going through her mind when she backed away? Was she just nervous? Didn't know what to say? And what do I say next time I see her? I've never been the talkative type, I've always been really shy, until recently, I've opened up quite a bit. But I'm just trying to figure out how to talk to her, how to get her number, name, all that stuff. All the girls I've gone after, my friends introduced us, so I've never really gone after someone like this before. Thanks for your time in advance!", "summary": "beautiful girl comes into the coffee shop I work at quite frequently, I make her a drink and she loves it, but when she left we had a slightly awkward encounter."}
{"id": "t3_fuohu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I find out if a girl recently became single?", "post": "Quick history lesson:\n\nLast summer a girl started working at my company.  We work in different departments.  When she started working, I took notice and made an effort to get to know her.  After a couple months, I asked her out and found out she was involved with someone......which was verified when we became facebook friends later on.  I didn't take it personal and we simply stayed friends at work.\n\nWell recently, I'm getting a vibe that she's interested in hanging out together.  We never hangout outside of work, we just talk during work and we'll go out to lunch together.  We never talk about personal topics, just current events.  Oh, and I deleted facebook a few months ago.  the reason I don't just ask is because I don't want her to think I'm just staying friends to wait until she's single.....cause that's not the case.  And I'd like to avoid the \"I already told you I'm involved\" response.  Like I stated eariler, we never talk about relationships, so it would be weird for me to bring it up nonchalantly.\n\nAre there methods of finding this type of info out?", "summary": "I asked a girl out a few months ago....she was taken.  Now I think she's single, but I don't know for sure.  How do I find out without seeming pushy?"}
{"id": "t3_21id31", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Victims of IRL Scam Meetups and Conventions, what are your stories?", "post": "Recently, I became aware of the Minecraft Convention scam, \"Meeting of the Mines,\" through BebopVox's [video on the subject.](\n\n(TL;D-Watch: Rich guy by the name of Kevin Roman ran a Minecraft convention. Claimed it was sponsored by Nickelodeon, Red Bull, and Play N Trade. Promised to give away a bunch of stuff, such as 200 Lego Minecraft sets, and 10 Playstation 4's. Only one", "summary": "Kevin Roman screwed over a solid 1000 people, got $50,000 from it, and made a half-assed Minecraft convention that lasted two hours and gave out pens instead of the many prizes they promised.)"}
{"id": "t3_432ltf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] and moving to the same city at my ex gf [22 F], not too sure how to handle it considering I'm still not over her", "post": "My ex and I had a brief relationship (around 2 months) a little over a year ago in college. We ended on relatively good terms. Despite being crazy for each other, we were both at tough points in our lives. Sometimes it felt like we didn't have time for each other. So she wanted to avoid either of us getting hurt and decided to end things. In my eyes it came from no where, since I was at least hoping to give things a shot. But I also didn't do much to try and win her back. I never fully got over her despite dating other girls and doing my best to move on. We had brief encounters in the pursuing months and it proved that she wasn't over me either. \n\nWe both graduated and after a couple months back in my home town, I decided to move to a new city. It just so happens that she lives in this same city. It's not the reason for me moving, I have many other friends that reside in that city, its in the same state as the school I graduated from, so most of my college friends live there too. But now that I've been in the process of securing a job and apartment, my ex has spontaneously started texting me again. She is now aware that I am moving up there and has been mentioning how much she would love to see me. \n\nI'm still not over this girl and I'm scared to get hurt again. I was in a really dark place for some time following our breakup and it wasn't too long ago that I finally felt like I was taking steps towards bouncing back. I'd be lying if I said the thought of us getting back together doesn't excite me, but I can't go down the same road as before.\n\nHow should I go about all this?\nIs the risk worth giving it another shot?", "summary": "Moving to the same city as my ex-gf she wants to see me, but I still have strong feelings for her and I'm scared of getting hurt"}
{"id": "t3_vjsuz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My GF is very depressed and going through a tough time right now. I don't know how to help, and I need guidance", "post": "Bare with me, its pretty long.\n\nAlright, so my gf has had a troubled past; she was raped when she was thirteen by a \"friend\" and as a result, her family completely fell apart. Her father actively despises her for this, her twin brother is an addict, and her parents are seeking a divorce. Her entire life since that incident has been a nightmare, and it shows in her relationships which have ended in her getting used and cheated on. Despite this she is very tough and resilient, but i think that stubbornness has run out.\n\nShe is very depressed and tells me how she has had enough and doesn't care anymore. her tumultuous relationship with her father is at the core of this. She dropped out of high school and just recently got her GED to show her dad she is willing to give schooling a second chance. The agreement was she would go to school and he would give her her car back. But he went back on his word and just yells at her and puts her down whenever she brings it up.\n\nSo now she's jobless without a car to take her to work and school and basically incapable of sustaining herself because of it. On top of that her dad kicked her out of the house for getting a tattoo, while her twin brother is an addict who comes home fucked up on god knows what. She's been living with my uncle since she is childhood friends with my cousin, but she has become completely depressed and demotivated. She feels like her situation is hopeless and has told me she doesnt care anymore. I don't know what to do or say to help, and its frustrating because i really care for her. \n\nI'm really scared guys.", "summary": "my girlfriend has a troubled past of rape and a broken family and is at a point where she wants to give up, don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2lss3m", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By being embarrassed of my smelly feet.", "post": "So, this was actually many years ago. \n\nI was still a virgin and had it bad for my female flat mate. There were 4 of us sharing the flat and one of the guys was a real psycho.\n\nOne evening we (me and said girl) were out at one of her friends for the evening drinking and getting stoned after a night shift (we also worked together in a casino).\n\nWhen it got to time to leave she decided she would stay the night on her friends futon to avoid dealing with Mr psycho, I was invited to share it with her.\n\nThis was after a 10 hour shift in a hot casino wearing cheap imitation leather shoes. Now my feet don't smell like roses under the best of conditions so there was no way I was gonna climb into bed with this girl, who I was truly besotted with, with feet that smelled like ass. \n\nSo I made an excuse and went on my way, happy with knowledge that she was happy to share a bed with me.\n\nI stepped out of the apartment, slipped on the stairs and snapped the tendons in my right ankle.\n\nPainfully and sheepishly and climbed back up the steps and asked them to call an ambulance for me (the hospital was far away, no-one had a car of money for a taxi).\n\nAt the hospital I had a 4 hour wait and stern lecture from the staff about wasting an ambulance.\n\nThat girl ended up being the one that got away, a few months later she was pregnant by her now husband.\n\nI am now happily engaged to a wonderful woman, but we all think about the one that got away, don't we?", "summary": "Embarrassed by smelly feet virgin boy passes up sex opportunity with girl he's been wanting for months, ends up in hospital by slipping on way home and loses chance with girl forever."}
{"id": "t3_1ogcvj", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Temporary Investment income for stay-at-home mom", "post": "30 years old.  Car paid off.  Student loans are paid off.  $45k in retirement.  Great credit.  3 years worth of emergency funding.  No debt other than my house, which holds a lot of value right now in this sellers market where I live.\n\nI don't particularly like my job.  I also HATE the city I live in.  And I'm expecting my first kid early next year. No one in my line of work gets pregnant because it's a male dominated field.  They get their wives pregnant and then continue working long hours.\n\nI'm considering quitting my job, selling the house, taking my emergency savings and moving close to my family where I could afford to pay cash for a new home similar to the one I'm in.  The problem is my job title is practically non-existent back home unless I start up my own gig, which would make this future motherhood thing much easier if I could work from home.\n\nIf I do this, I need to consider that my start-up might take a year or two to take off.  In which case, I'm looking for some reliable investment income that would just pay the bills and health insurance, let's say $2400 a month.  I'm planning on buying a couple properties to rent out, but I want to be sure to diversify with the additional funds I have.  Is it even realistic to think I can generate $1000+/ monthly from stocks/bonds/etc. if I were to invest only $50k?\n\nUp until now I've been playing around on etrade like it's vegas... investing a little here, getting back a little there.  So far my 5 month return has only been $4k, but that was with only an $8k starting investment, and since I didn't know much I kind of feel I just got lucky.\n\nAny help would be gladly appreciated!", "summary": "total life overhaul. Looking to generate $1000+/monthly to pay bills with $50k starting investment.  If that's not feasible, throw a more realistic number at me."}
{"id": "t3_4rucgg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my ex girlfriend[17 F] 1 month, How to move on.", "post": "So my ex girlfriend and myself were close friends for an extremely long time and eventually we got into a relationship (30/12/15) and she broke up with me a few months back (2/02/16). \n\nI loved her a lot and I still do. She really screwed me over and I never got closure from the relationship. We ended on good terms but we now no longer speak because she dislikes me for some reason. I still see her around college talking and flirting with other lads and it really makes me angry.\n\nI get really protective and obsessive over her and I want to get over her before I do something crazy that I will regret. Any advice?", "summary": "I want to get over my ex before I do something crazy that could land me in trouble and I will regret. Any help (p.s, I have tried counselling and all of the generic stuff)"}
{"id": "t3_1qacj1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [21/M] have ALWAYS been in a relationship for about 5 years - how do I begin to have a positive relationship with myself?", "post": "So I'm not sure if this is the best subreddit for my question, but I figure it's worth a shot!\n\nI have been in relationships with multiple women since I was 16 pretty much constantly. The longest I've lasted without any sort of commitment has been literally a week before I've managed to rope myself into something new.\n\nI have just broken up with my most recent girlfriend [19/F] after recognising that I think what I need most in my life for myself at this point is to be 'okay' with being 'alone' for quite sometime.\nI don't think I'm a terribly dependant person (aside from emotionally) as I have certainly made a solid path for myself. More I feel this is a fear that I've avoided and simply never faced.\n\nI have never let myself fully 'get over' someone and let myself go through any sort of heartbreak. I literally dive into the next thing.\n\nI'm very scared at the moment of being alone - despite trying to be rational that I'm a young man with plenty of life to see. I guess it's more fear of the unfamiliar and unknown.\n\nSo reddit, how do I teach myself to be okay with 'being alone\"?", "summary": "Been in relationships all the time for all of adult life. Fear of being alone. How do I be okay with being alone?"}
{"id": "t3_w63mm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "birthday's are a meaningless excuse to have a party and feel more special than you are, and the term cake day is so painfully contrived it hurts.", "post": "(not meant as a serious dissertation; there is little weight or concern on the matter. i just have too much free time sometimes.)\n\nfor several months i was unsure whether it meant IRL, or the anniversary of becoming a redditor. \n\ni think an excuse to have a party and feel special is fine, especially for children, and to a lesser extent young adults. i feel that to use it to beg for meaningless scraps of attention is absurd and unattractive, but so many of them do it they reinforce each other. most times i find it mildly annoying and ignore it and the post, but i wanted to put my thoughts here one time. i realize it's a petty complaint, but i still wish people would behave more like adults. unless it's all teenagers doing it. if that's the case, my apologies. but for some reason i strongly suspect that it's not limited to that demographic. anyone else have a thought on the matter they'd like to share?", "summary": "birthdays are fine for children, but for god's sake grow up already. unless you're teenagers. in that case, carry on. but i still would like the term cake day to fall into disuse."}
{"id": "t3_pnqbp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Feel like me and my GF are stuck in a \"loop\", could use some advice.", "post": "My GF (23) and I (21), have been dating for 2 years and we had been acquaintances for a year or so before hand. We see a lot of each other and spend the night together 80+% of the time, whether at my place or hers. \n\nWe have had a recurring argument for a long time that comes up every 2 months or so about her perceptions our relationship, where she feels that I take her for granted, that she does so much for me that I don't seem to appreciate and that I'm not always there for her. Often the argument comes up after one of us has been away from the other for a couple days. I try to be supportive and talk it out with her because its important to me that I understand her frustrations and make sure it doesn't happen again but when we start getting to the root of the problem (this can take a very long time, since she is reluctant to talk about it) she tends to get more upset saying that explaining herself just makes her sound like the \"bad guy\". When I tell her that its really upsetting to me that she does this (It gives me the feeling that I've done something horribly wrong but it never gets resolved and I never get any indication of how to be a better BF for her) she shrugs it off and we go on until the next time this happens. \n\nIn the mean time she has been busier and busier with school, spending little time with friends, since her free time is usually spent with me (her choice) and our sex life has been less and less active.\n\nI just feel like we're stuck in a loop and at the same time our relationship is faltering in other ways. I'm not sure what to do.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I have recurring fight about me not living up to her expectations that goes unresolved despite my interest in laying it to rest."}
{"id": "t3_1n5eda", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Definitely wanting to change my major but I would like some opinions", "post": "Apologies in advance for the length and I would like to note that I do have plans to talk to various people at my university but I would like to hear from fellow Redditors who have perhaps been in similar situations.\nAnyways, here's my situation:\n\nI am currently a sophomore graphic design major. When I graduated high school I thought for sure that graphic design was what I wanted to do but after getting a little farther into the program and looking ahead, I've decided that it's not something I want to continue with.\n\nFor those wondering why I don't want to continue, I'm honestly just not as passionate about graphic design and the time commitment is causing me a lot of stress. I hate to sound lazy, but I want a major/to take classes that will allow me to have a life. I've even found myself wishing I had papers to write.\n\nWith that being said, I am not 100% what I would want to switch majors to, but I do have some ideas. At the same time, I don't want to completely switch to another major only to find out that once again it's not what I like. I am definitely finishing out this semester in my graphics classes and I plan on putting forth effort, but I'm not as concerned about whether or not my projects are \"portfolio-material.\"\n\nHere is what I am thinking about doing for next semester:\nI have not taken a ton of general education courses so I am wanting to take a variety of classes that interest me and also fulfill general education requirements. Of the possible majors I am thinking of switching to, some of these general education classes do apply to them or fit in the same category. Is this a good idea? Like I mentioned before, I don't want to completely throw myself into a different major in the event that it's not what I'm interested in.", "summary": "wanting to switch majors but uncertain as to what I want to switch to; should I take a variety of general education classes that interest me next semester? "}
{"id": "t3_36i4mb", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting into university.", "post": "After all my applications were sent off I was stuck waiting patiently for responses, expecting the earliest in about 6 weeks time.\n\nSo you can understand my shock when I read an E-mail from one of the better schools saying that I've been accepted unconditionally a few hours ago.\n\nFirst thing I do is call my dad, sheer excitement pouring out of my voice like an orgasmic Niagara Falls.\n\n(Introducing Senor FU) Riddled with happiness I jump up for joy, pull my knees in (I swear I got some hang time) and extend them outwards.\n\nMy left foot lands on the floor, entirely on the left pinky toe. And I collapse.\n\nPain shoots up my left leg like Satan himself had just decided to test it as a new location for hell. As if he were sexually assaulting my foot with a barbed fishhook.\n\nAfter an hour of laughing at myself I decided to go to the doctor, handed in my insurance information and they took an X-ray. Doctor says I might have broken my foot due to how I can't move my little toe, but it might be a fracture or, even better, just a severe sprain.", "summary": "Got into university, and in my excitement I jumped for joy, landed on my foot and severely damaged it. Won't know what's up for a day or two."}
{"id": "t3_10imeb", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Canada] Legality of gay webcam sex between an 18-year-old and a 15-year-old?", "post": "When I was 18, I met someone playing an online game. We had a ton of things in common, one of which is we were both gay. (We're also both Canadian.)\n\nWe started talking; one thing led to another and we ended up jerking off on a webcam together. We both willingly did this a few times.\n\nEventually it occurred to me that I was jerking off with a minor, and might be illegal. Not wanting to end up on a sex-offenders list or spend any time in jail, I quickly ceased all communication with my friend.\n\nFast forward five years, my now 20-year-old friend manages to e-mail me. He says that he's thought about me a lot and thought I hated him. \n\nSo two questions:\n\nWas the stuff I did on a webcam five years ago illegal?\n\nWould it be OK for me (now 23) to renew communications with my friend?", "summary": "Five years ago, 18M masturbated with a 15M male over a webcam. 18yo ceases communication in fear of legality. Five years later, now 20yo wants renew communications. Legal/Not Legal?"}
{"id": "t3_2yrtlw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (24F) know when it's right to move in with SO (25M) of 1.5yr?", "post": "This wouldn't be taking place for at least another year, and we're aware of the practical matters that need to be addressed. My problem is that I use to live with my ex of 3.5yrs, and when we broke up it was very hard on me, since I saw moving in together as a commitment/serious investment in our future. I rushed into it the first time, but this time I'm incredibly gun shy. What emotional / relationship oriented things should I be prepared for or already have established in my relationship prior to moving in? What should we discuss? How do you know if it's a good idea?", "summary": "use to live with ex, bad idea. Plan to move in with current SO, nervous. How can we ensure we're ready?"}
{"id": "t3_3muls2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When should I (M34) tell my soon to be ex wife (F33) that I'm in a new relationship?", "post": "Long story short, my soon to be ex-wife (married for 8 yrs) and I called it quits in the spring. She moved out of the house (for the second time) over a year ago. We've had issues for the past three years. We haven't been a couple for a long time now and rarely talked in the past year since she moved out. She hasn't been taking this as well as I have been. I was relieved when we decided to divorce as it was so much grief for so very long. I was also the one carrying the relationship. Needless to say, I've been living alone and with the encouragement of my friends and family I started dating at the beginning of the summer. As far as I know, my soon to be ex wife does not know. I do not know if she has been dating either. I have found a really amazing women and we have committed to each other and I can see this new relationship going somewhere. My problem is that I do not want my ex to find out I'm with someone else by seeing us out or by hearing second hand. I want to approach this as the adults we are. However, I am afraid that she'll get very upset and try to take it out on me financially throughout the divorce process. My gut says not to say anything unless it comes up but on the other hand, I want to get this off of my chest so I can be more public about this new relationship. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks!", "summary": "Getting a divorce from my wife of 8 years and not sure when to tell my ex I'm in a new relationship."}
{"id": "t3_v5e4e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend's ex-GF wanted to visit him all the way from other end of country- I told him I was uncomfortable and he told his Ex not to come because of me!", "post": "Me 21f and Boyfriend 23m\nWe have been dating for 1.5 years. We are past the honeymoon phase but overall things have been great. He is extremely caring, makes me feel special and we are both in love. We've gotten through some rough patches in the past and I really want things to work out well... but I'm having a hard time getting past this:\n\nHe got in touch with his ex-GF from high school recently. I know he basically loved her and pined for her all through high school and didn't entirely get over her until he met me. They occasionally kept each other updated by hanging out when they were both in their hometown or fb messages. She often says \"I miss you\" etc. which makes me a little uncomfortable. To some extent she enjoyed getting the attention from him in high school and kept him hanging even though she didn't like him that way. I feel like she may treat him the same now when she says things like that. \n\nShe emailed him a while ago that she was coming to visit him. He told me of it immediately. She hadn't given any details but made it seem like her trip all the way was just to see him. I was uncomfortable and wasn't even in town at the time and expressed that to my boyfriend. He immediately told her not to come see him because I said so. It was only then that she revealed that she was visiting her family there along with her current boyfriend and it wasn't a trip just to see my boyfriend. \n\nI was a little embarrassed of this... but still feel like my boyfriend shouldn't have so bluntly told her it was my fault! It felt like he confided in her something that was between us and it just felt wrong! I trust my boyfriend completely but am so scared now that he confides in her things that are personal to us. He still wants to stay friends with her and I won't tell him not to do that... they have been in contact since then too and I try not to let it get to me but I'm having a hard time getting past it.\n\nWhat should I do, Reddit?", "summary": "Boyfriend's ex-GF wanted to visit him all the way from other end of country- I told him I was uncomfortable and he told his Ex not to come because of me! Am I wrong to feel hurt by his honesty?"}
{"id": "t3_2a02xt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [19M] learn to not try to prove I can still get girls even though I have a girlfriend [20F]?", "post": "Okay I know the question is a bit strange, so let me elaborate. I've always had this back-of-my-mind need for people to like/want me. I'm in an amazing relationship with a girl I love more than anything or anyone in the world, but i can't shake this need. The problem is that it mainly manifests with other girls. I don't cheat, I don't even flirt very much, but I have this awful habbit of seemingly trying to prove I can still get some of these girls I'm around. It's almost like I miss the chase, but I don't because I love my girl and would never cheat. Is there a way for me to change this quality? I seriously hate being like this, but I don't know how to stop as I've had this problem pretty much my whole life. It's creating strain in my relationship, and my girlfriend and I have talked about it and I'm obviously going to do my best to get over it, but I'd really like to stop for good and not have to force/fake it forever. Has anybody had this problem before or have any tips for how to do this?", "summary": "I can't stop trying to prove that I can get girls even though I have a girlfriend, and I desperately want to stop"}
{"id": "t3_kr0z5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it possible to burn a dvd in the same manner as burning an mp3 cd? I.E to make a 1,000 song disc?", "post": "Hello AskReddit, I did some preliminary searching and turned up nothing, so if this is a repost, I sincerely apologize.\n  To the point; in the past I have burned numerous mp3 cds for my listening enjoyment. However, a 60 song playlist only lasts for so long. Recently, in a moment of nerd audacity I made the claim that I could burn a dvd disc in the same manner for a total tracklist of ~1000 songs (given the avg size of an mp3, etc, etc.) Am I correct? Or should I notify them that I may have made an error and cannot make an \"infinite playlist\", as it were.", "summary": "Can I burn dvd discs in the same manner as a cd, in effect making a huge mp3 disc? "}
{"id": "t3_4wotdn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "M 16 looking for advice: Overprotective parents stopped being overprotective, not good at things I'm not familiar with. How do I meet and talk to girls?", "post": "My parents have always been overprotective, the only time I really get to see my friends is school r during sporting games, literally no other time.\n\nWe live in a small town of about 3000 people.\n\nBut ever since I got my drivers license, I've been completely free to do anything for some reason.\n\nIn school I'm really not one of those kids who's quiet and doesn't talk to people, I'm actually surprisingly \"popular\" and outgoing, despite not seeing my friends very much at all. \n\nThat being said, I think the reason for this is because it's a really small town and school that I've become familiar with, seeing the same faces every single day.\n\nI really want to go out in the world and into some cities very close to where I live to meet some new people and possibly find a relationship (I'm too good of friends with everybody in my town for them to be relationship possibilities)\n\nThat being said, I need your help. First, where are cool places to meet girls my age to just befriend and possibly something more? The other thing I need help with is just preparing myself mentally for this change in not being overly protected and going out and doing all of this relationship type stuff that I have no experience in whatsoever. I feel as though it's just a more intimate version of friendship. But I can't be sure.", "summary": "overprotected. Got license. Not overprotected anymore. Going to big city to meet people. How2relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_393j1a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my girlfriend [25 F] of 7 years, I cheated, confessed, asking for forgiveness", "post": "I was angry at my girlfriend, drunk, and I made a mistake. I met a random. We did not have sex but I went home with her and we fooled around. We were long distance at the time, but I returned a few weeks ago and had to confess the truth to her, so I told her everything.\n\nShe is obviously very hurt and I am asking for forgiveness from her, but not expecting it. We will be long distance again soon for another 8 months, and she will not be able to trust me. She is a lovely and beautiful person, compassionate and caring, and I don't want to lose her over this mistake, but fear I already have.... I am lost. Where do I go from here? Am I too far gone?", "summary": "I cheated, I confessed, I want to be forgived and keep trying. Is there anything I can do or do I not deserve her?"}
{"id": "t3_zjv2x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF (19) and I (21) are loosing hope that this long distance relationship can work out. How can we restore this hope?", "post": "Dear redditors,\n\nI (m21) and my gf (f19) have been in a relationship for a bit over a year. We have been in a long distance relationship for all of the time, seeing each other only a couple of weeks or days every few months. I have known her for over 7 years now, and I really am in love with her. On paper we are perfect for each other. \n\nThe only issue is that we do not live in the same countries. I grew up in her/our hometown and left to go study in the states 4 years ago, and recently returned to europe a month ago for a phd program. she is right out of high school and wanted to start with college in her hometown. \n\nwe just had a lenghty skype conversation in which our future was a prominent part of the talk. Since she is starting with her bachelors right now, and I am in my first year of a phd program, it seems as if there is no end of this long distance relationship in sight. I really do not want this relationship to end, I know that I will regret it forever, since she has been my crush for ages and is also the perfect girl. I am pretty sure these feelings are mutual. \n\nHere is the question: How can we restore trust in this long distance relationship that seems to never come to an end? (at least 4 more years) I know that quitting my phd program will be a decision that I will forever regret, but I also know that I will forever regret destroying this relationship because I needed to do a phd. I am really at loss for ideas... What can we do? I really want this to work. Any advice?", "summary": "GF and I had the first real talk on the future of our LD relationship, and the meager prospects are destroying our relationship."}
{"id": "t3_1a4k5w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend (22F) spending 1on1 time with random guy i've (23M) never seen or heard of before while I'm out of town. Do I make anything of it?", "post": "I'm out of town for about 2 weeks. A few days ago my girlfriend posts pictures of her and some random guy that I've never heard her mention and that I've never met. No idea who he is. But they're out on a hike together, clearly just them two. We've been talking every day since I've been gone but she's neglected to mention any of this to me, but she is obviously comfortable enough to post pictures etc on facebook knowing I'd see them. Just wondering if you guys think if I should mention anything or if I'm being overbearing. We never really hang out 1on1 with anyone else of the opposite sex and I don't think I'd ever feel comfortable doing so without giving my SO a heads up... let alone while she's out of town for an extended period...", "summary": "girlfriend is spending 1on1 time with an unidentified male while i am out of town, neglected to tell me anything about it but posted pictures on facebook*"}
{"id": "t3_30fb1k", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By trying to carry too much down the stairs", "post": "OK so this didn't happen today, it actually happened a few Christmases ago.\n\nSome background - I was wearing these really corny Christmas socks which were really slippery for some reason \n\nIt was about mid afternoon and we were getting ready to eat when my mum asked me to get some extra plates from upstairs in the loft. I go and up and they are all it a huge box. I didn't know how many she needed so decided to bring the whole box down. After I had got down from the loft, I picked up the box and proceeded down the stairs wearing my slippery christmas socks and instead carefully taking it step by step, I thought it would be clever to carry it in front of my face and walk straight down. I couldn't see anything because the box was so big and about half way down the stairs, I began slipping. I almost regained my balance but started running/slipping down the stairs until I got to the bottom, dropped the box(smashing the plates and smacked my face into the radiator, breaking my front tooth. Since it was Christmas, nothing was open so I couldn't get it fixed until a later date.", "summary": "I tries to carry a box down the stairs wearing slippery socks, slipped and fell and spent the rest of Christmas day miserable with a broken front tooth."}
{"id": "t3_46i38q", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by saying a visitor to our office looked homeless.", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nSo this happened about an hour ago. \n\nI work in a very small office. There's only 6 people in the entire company. Everyone can hear everything from each others desks.\n\nMy boss is away on a conference right now and the 5 of us are at our desks. So when there's a knock at the door that's very unusual.\n\nSo this man comes in, he's wearing this side opened singlet, I can see his ribs, he's got wild, messy hair and ripped jeans.\n\nMy first thought was \"Oh god. A homeless person has walked into the office and is going to ask for money\".\n\nBut then he says \"I'm here to see James\" (not real name).\n\nJames is the graphics designer and my boss' brother in law.\n\nJames is busy on the phone, so this guy starts chatting with me. Makes a comment about my star wars mug and we talk about the new movie. He seems like a nice guy.\n\nJames finishes with the call and says \"Ok, lets go outside and chat\".\n\n15 minutes later James comes back on his own and I say \"Hey James, no offence intended to your friend, he seemed like a nice guy, but when he first came in I thought he was homeless and was going to ask for money\".\n\nJames responds with \"That's my brother in law. Your boss' brother\".\n\nMy face goes red and the entire office has been quiet since the incident.", "summary": "Homeless looking person comes into a small office. I tell my coworker that I thought he was homeless, it turned out to be my boss' brother."}
{"id": "t3_2223m8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my SO [25 M] of 2 years - am I wrong to have thoughts about breaking up?", "post": "24F, SO 25M; duration 2 years. I still love him dearly but I'm unsure if we should continue being together. We are both on medication for depression. \n\nFor the past 7 months my boyfriend has been passive and unaffectionate. He ignored my birthday, never wants sex, doesn't want to go out, doesn't keep small promises, never contacted me during a month of long distance (I had to call/text him constantly to stay in communication). \n\nI've tried to be as understanding as I can, but... I don't think he values my presence anymore. For these past 7 months he wants to be alone 99% of the time and doesn't want to talk or even cuddle for more than half an hour or so. I don't ask him for anything and try to make him happy (give gifts, make dinner, listen and encourage him). \n\nHe says he still loves me and wants to stay together, and that this has been due to his depression. I helped him find a better doctor and a therapist. But our patterns haven't changed, he's still passive and unaffectionate. We've talked about it several times and he's promised that he will change, but he never does.  \n\nI know it's not his fault, it's the depression, but I still feel really lonely and neglected. What should I do?", "summary": "Boyfriend depressed for 7 months; passive and unaffectionate; despite all my efforts and understanding I feel lonely and neglected, not sure if we should continue"}
{"id": "t3_3l0i6u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20 F] boyfriend [22 M] of six months is depressed and thinks everyone treats him terribly and I can't seem to help him", "post": "My boyfriend seems to be struggling mentally recently. He is unhappy and negative most of the time. He's told me a lot of worrying things for example that his existence is sad, that he might have mental illness, and that he's a bad person. Nothing I say comforts him. When he tells me stuff I tell him that his feelings aren't wrong or made up but it's likely that depression or some other mental issue is affecting his perception somewhat, and that I don't think he's a bad person or his existence is sad, etc. He literally will respond \"I don't feel comforted by your words\", and the one time I suggested seeing a professional he got angry and shut me down. So, my first question is whether anyone has advice on how to talk to someone struggling with depression, and how I might be able to suggest a therapist without upsetting him.\n\nThe second thing I want to address is that he feels like pretty much everyone treats him worse than he deserves to be treated. \nFrom my perspective people treat him pretty well. He has had a couple ex-girlfriends that seem to have treated him poorly. Today he texted me \"People definitely treat other people better. That's just a fact. It's something about me\". Just based off our own relationship I feel like he tends to sort of victimize himself. He definitely feels like he gives significantly more than he receives. I didn't realize until recently that this attitude might extend to his other relationships as well. So my second question is to people who have had experiences with people who feel this way. Is this attitude likely to change? I don't want to call him sensitive because that seems very dismissive but I also don't think on the whole people treat him badly and I have a difficult time agreeing with him when he says stuff like that which I think bothers him.", "summary": "My boyfriend seems to be very unhappy with his life and I don't feel able to help him. He also feels that most people treat him especially badly which I just don't agree with."}
{"id": "t3_3h62ym", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [40 F] with my husband [40 M] . . . we have been married 17 years. He has absolutely no interest in going out on date nights, not even for our anniversary or for my birthday.", "post": "I'm just hurting inside. Number one, he doesn't want to spend time with me without the kids. Number two, it doesn't matter to him at all that I would like some time without the kids. You'd think that even if he didn't want to go out, he'd do it at least once a year for me, you know?\n\nWe moved here, 400 miles away from my family, so he could take his dream job. Between work and school he is often gone 80 hours a week. One of our children is special needs with sensory processing disorder and anxiety/depression. I do most of the parenting while trying to run a freelance business on the side. \n\nMy family would often help with the kids but without the family support and with him being gone it's so hard. And he won't compromise. He just doesn't ever want to go out on date nights. He'll happily go to a baseball game for work or go out golfing with his buddies, but he'll never do anything for me. And I get really sad that he doesn't seem to crave any alone time with me.  \n\nAm I being unreasonable to want to get out on a date night? What should I do?", "summary": "My husband doesn't want to go out on dates nights EVER and I am going crazy inside and feeling bad about myself."}
{"id": "t3_30moqi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Relationship] My sext friend of about a year [19f] confided in me [20m] a week after breaking things off, that she tried to kill herself. What the hell do I do?", "post": "I met this girl through one of friends and we hit it off. After a month or so of sexting and flirtation, she moved to Texas. I live in California btw. So we continued sexting and talking for about a year. One day she says \"Bye.\" And doesn't respond to anything I say. \n\nA week goes by before she texts me again. She says she doesn't like me anymore and wants to stop being friends. So she stops talking to me. \n\nNow a week after that (today) she tells me she's sorry and doesn't really want to end things and the reason she tried to leave is because she tried to kill herself. I haven't responded. I don't know what to do. She's two states over, and we can only talk. What..what the hell do I do?", "summary": "my sext friend a thousand miles away says she tried to kill herself and now I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4g88ey", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17F] with my SO [17F] of 1.3 years wants to break up because of distance. Need advice on how to cope", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nSo this was my first serious relationship with this amazing girl and it was almost near perfect. Unfortunately life decisions are causing us to seperate in the upcoming months with atleast a 6 hour difference between us. This distance will not go away for atleast the next 6+ years and I totally realize sustaining a LDR with no end goal is very difficult.\n\nShe said said she would like to break up and become friends as we get closer to going our seperate ways. Initially, I wanted to atleast give it a shot and see what comes of it - and if we were both truly unhappy I would be fine with breaking it off. I understand now, that this will only delay the eventual breakup and I support her decision as well.\n\nI'm having difficulty with realizing what this means though. It bothers me when I realize I wont get to know the little things in her life or be a priority anymore. It bothers me that eventually she will get intimate with someone else thats not me. She was the first person I would tell when something happened to me, now I dont know who will listen to the little things with the genuine interest she had. Again, this is my first long term relationship so I'm wondering does it really get better. Will I wake up one morning and no longer wonder how she is doing? For now, some mornings I wake up feeling physically sick realizing that we will be near strangers in a matter of months.", "summary": "First Longterm relationship (mutual) breakup. Having difficulty dealing with the eventual aftermath. Pls tell me it gets better."}
{"id": "t3_1vi061", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my SO [23 F] of 3 months - seems unenthusiastic when asking me if I want to hang out", "post": "We hang out often, we thoroughly enjoy each other's company, and don't really have any issues in our relationship. Pretty vanilla. But a small thing that's been bothering me lately is how she goes about asking me if I want to hang out with her.\n\nIf she's going out to a party, or out with some of our mutual friends, she will typically ask me if I want to come along. But when she asks - and I think it's something she's unaware of - she doesn't seem like she really wants me to be there. For example, she never explicitly states that she wants me to be there, it's usually just \"Hey, there's a party\" or \"Hey, do you want to come hang out with x & y\". And if I say no, and I give some sort of reason, she never fights to get me to go. She never really shows any emotion when I say yes or no. She just says \"all right\" and moves on. I don't think she's ever explicitly stated that she wants me to go. How i've felt about it recently, is that she acts as if she's completely okay with me not going and that she's asking because she feels she's obligated to, because i'm her boyfriend.\n\nI love that she asks and lets me know almost every time she goes out, but it just doesn't make me feel very special when she words it in that sort of way. I'm going to bring it up soon and tell her it bothers me, but I wanted some input from unbiased people beforehand. I might be looking too much into it, not sure.", "summary": "gf often asks me if i want to hang out with her and her friends, but never expresses that she actually wants me to go."}
{"id": "t3_32xzf2", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by meeting the girlfriend's parents...", "post": "So, unlike most posts, this happened today. I figured it would make a good first post. \n\nA little background: I've been seeing my girlfriend, let's call her Sarah, so 4 months now, and we're both at uni. Sarah comes from a traditional 'no sex before marriage' family, but she doesn't seem to follow that rule. It was quite an important weekend as we're getting serious, and she wanted me to meet her parents.\n\nI took Sarah out for dinner yesterday, and we stumbled back to her uni flat (where I was staying that weekend) after a few drinks to well, you know ;)... First thing we did wrong: we forgot to lock the door... \n\nSo next morning, we woke up and when Sarah looks at her phone and starts to panic. It turns out she forgot to tell me her parents were due in half an hour. She jumps up and goes in the shower (her university has en-suites). A few minutes later I decide I should probably move, realising I didn't have much time, I got up, fully naked at this point, trying to find my bag to get some clothes on, when there's a knock at the door. I thought, stay quiet it'll be fine, & Sarah couldn't hear it over the shower. Next thing I know the door opens, time slows in my mind as I find her family (parents, and her 2 younger sisters aged 17 & 18) stood in the doorway staring at my semi-erect member... As awkward as this is it gets worse, Sarah then walks out the bathroom naked having forgotten her towel, to find me standing staring at the door in silence. She turned see what was there and well... I'm pretty sure she wanted to cry with embarrassment. \nHer family on the other hand, I'm sure her dad was ready to kill me, her mom and sisters were just staring at my body (what can I say? I'm quite well built ;) ).\nAfter an uncomfortable amount of silence, they said they'd be back later and closed the door... \n\nHow the hell do I get on with her family now!?", "summary": "due to meet the gf's parents, forgot to lock the door. Next morning her family walk in whilst I was naked..."}
{"id": "t3_3po7nu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Outside perspective with a friend.", "post": "I (30f) have a friend (25f) and we have been pretty close the last 3 years. She was my maid of honor in my wedding and we hit it off right away quickly becoming best friends. \nThe last few months I have been noticing how incredibly toxic she is. Constantly saying she will do something and then fall through. I catch her lying and she denies it. When her love life is going well, I fall to the sidelines. \nWhen I bring things up to her that upset me she always turns it against me. She does this so often that I start to question if I really am a horrible person for being hurt that she is late, doesn't let me know she won't be able to come while I've been waiting, or being thankful enough. \nI need to find a way to end this relationship, but I worry as she deals with depression/anxiety (as do I) and when another friend finally called it quits she told me how she contemplated sucide. \nI really just need an outside perspective on this as I've been struggling for awhile.", "summary": "My (30f) friend (25f) of three years is toxic and I need help figuring out a way to end things. She has a history of contemplating sucide."}
{"id": "t3_q8s7e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Sex Issues in an Otherwise Great Relationship", "post": "My boyfriend and I (both 27) have been living together and dating for about two years (we started out as friends who lived together with another roommate.) I am a girl. Just need some advice, thanks. :)\n\nThe problem is that he has always had a much lower sex drive than I do. We have sex maybe 3 or 5 times a month, and when we do it is usually satisfying for both of us. But he usually just says he is too tired or that he wants to get up early so he has to sleep instead of sex, or some other barely-believable excuse. I basically just have to wait for him to initiate sex. He claims to be very attracted to me and I am extremely attracted to him. \n\nI still feel a lot of pressure to initiate sex and seduce him, even though when I do it rarely works which usually ends up with me being all excited for no reason. There is a constant conflict in my mind about whether or not to attempt any seduction and risk the rejection.\n\nThis whole situation is slowly eroding my self-esteem and I feel like I am acting like a different person more and more. I have talked to him about it but he takes it very personally (understandably) and I basically have to accept him how he is or break up.\n\nIs this a bad reason to break up? Could this be caused by his alcoholism? Has anyone found any effective ways to deal with such a situation? Masturbation is not nearly as satisfying, emotionally or physically, as sex with my SO.", "summary": "Boyfriend has a low sex-drive and I am considering ending our relationship even though that is the only problem in it."}
{"id": "t3_1a6ar8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it okay to talk to a dead friend's family members about him?", "post": "I had a friend who died in a plane crash a few years ago. He was a pretty young guy, though 8 years older than me. It was very tragic and unexpected. His family has been good friends with my family for many years, and since we met when I was around 10 I had considered him a mentor to me -- he taught me a lot of things related to programming (which I was interested in as a teenager), helped instill a love of learning in me, and gave me a ton of life lessons in general all while making me feel that it was coming from a friend. All in all, he was a great guy. \n\nHis parents still visit mine quite a bit. One time when his mom was at my parents' I brought him up, thinking I would tell her some of my memories of him and basically telling her how much I admired and respected him. She started bawling inconsolably. This was maybe a year ago. This weekend, they were at my parents' place again. Me, my girlfriend, my sister, and his sister were sitting and talking. My girlfriend's socially awkward, high-functioning autistic 15 year old brother has started very much getting into learning about computers, and I try and emulate my friend towards him. My girlfriend's brother somehow became the subject of conversation, and I brought up my friend. I'm not sure how his sister took it -- there was a fleeting instant of very strong emotions on her face, but she shrugged it off and kept the conversation going.\n\nMy questions is, is this a big faux-pas? Should I avoid bringing him up in the future? Reddit, what do you think?", "summary": "A friend of mine died in a plane crash. I brought him up to his mom once making her cry. The reaction from his sister was very brief, but also strong. Should I avoid him as a topic of conversation"}
{"id": "t3_2dkpn9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34 F] with [28 M] seeing for 2 months, started communicating less then gave the we need to talk", "post": "Hoping for the best here but want to see what others might glean from this. We have been dating for a little over 2 months, instant connection, spent a lot of time together the first month and a half. Then he got busy at work and side project and started being around less and responding intermittently to texts. \n\nI sensed something was up (assuming just stressed out) and started inviting him to more things and for him to stay over at my place more - with the intent of \"hey this will take your mind off stuff\" - \"not hey i am needy.\"\n\nAnyways, he was going to be out of town for the day and I sent him a text with a (tasteful and cute) photo of me and texted \"if you want to cuddle when you get back\" - no response. He had mentioned having issues with texts so I texted him a little later and was like \"did you get the photo?\" and he responded **\"yeah, sorry it did. it's not a great time but we should talk about this\"** and I responded that that would be good.\n\nThe next day I texted back that I wanted to talk and thanked him for bringing that up and said I sensed he was stressed which is why i was inviting him out and offering my company and he responded **\"yeah. sorry these projects just crept up on me\"**\n\nSo that is it, his responses were kind of vague so wondering what you all glean from it. I really like him and he has said the same about me, we haven't officially called whatever it is a relationship but i feel like it is, so this weirdness is really stressing me out.", "summary": "Things were great, guy started getting distant, wants to talk  - what does it all mean? is there hope??  "}
{"id": "t3_105yq6", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [17] am starting to fall for my best friend [17]", "post": "Lately I, 17 male, have gotten really close to one of my best female friends who is also 17. I have known her since freshman year of high school and we are both now seniors. I haven't ever had a romantic attraction toward her until within this week.\nI have started to become more attracted to her because we have been hanging out more frequently, other than just IMing or texting each other. A lot of people have also asked the both of us if we are interested in each other or dating, and that has made me reassess the whole situation.\nI don't want to like her because i'm afraid we will end up dating and then it will never be the same between us, if we break up\nShe asks advice from me about other boys that she has her eye on and thinks are attractive, so I'm pretty sure that she doesn't have any feelings toward me other than being her best friend.\nShe is also super indecisive about how she feels toward boys that she does like. At first she likes them a lot but then once their true colors start to show she loses interest.\nI don't want to distance myself but I feel as if I am doing that already.\nShould I tell her how I am feeling? And if so, how do I go about doing so?", "summary": "I'm starting to like my best friend and I would like to know if I should tell her, and if I should, how so?"}
{"id": "t3_1pr8ai", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [25M] being paranoid with the communication gaps w/ my SO [28F]", "post": "My SO & I have been together since June in a LDR, with her studying a broad in Europe (met her online). She will be here for the holidays, so we will be together soon (which were are ecstatic & giddy for)\n\nWe text daily from sun up to sun down & Skype as often as possible. Our future is mostly already planned, but other things like kids will be discussed when she gets here. 1-2x a week there will be a 3-4hr gap minimum between her last text. During that time I still text saying how much I love her, how much she means to me, ask her how her day is going and such. Being that she is 5hrs ahead of me I always take that into account as for gaps.\n\nI'm always worried about her being that I can't physically be there to protect, so that is always on my mind daily. When the long gaps occur I become even more worried, so I text her from every hour to every 30min asking her a question. I don't want her to think I'm clingy, since I know most women hate it. She knows how much I worry about her being that we are so far apart.\n\nAfter 4+ hrs she replies saying \"I luv u\" \"miss u\" \"srry I wrried u\". I tell her it's alright & that I'm just glad to know she is safe...she tells me she loves me always right after.", "summary": "SO sometimes takes 4+ hrs to respond to texts & I'm worried already about her due to LDR (for now) so it makes it even worse. Am I paranoid?"}
{"id": "t3_2m2qhx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (26F) have been recently sleeping with a friend (27M) who is behind my back now pursuing a relationship with a close mutual friend. (20F)", "post": "I don't know how I feel.\n\nI've recently gotten out of a five year relationship, of which the final 6 months he had a seriously full blown emotional and physical affair.\n\nComing out I felt great, I met a great bunch of new friends - a mix of guys and girls. About 5 months into the friendship, I started sleeping with one of the guys. We agreed it was casual, and neither of us would pursue it again. But he did last week, very much so. We slept together multiple times that night.\n\nSo I hear a conversation between him and one of the girls in our group about how he doesn't remember sleeping with me or not. I confront him, and he tells me he remembers 100% of the night, and never said that to her.\n\nHim and this girl, over the days following, are all over each other right in front of me. Tonight, I over hear a conversation between her and another one of the friends, that he asked he on a date. She said she sees things happening between them next month.\n\nI feel total used and in the dark. But don't know if I should feel that way. I've since heard he has no recollection what so ever about the conversation he had with her. \n\nI just feel like he's been selfish, liking this girl, sleeping multiple times with her friend, but still then asking her on a date... I'm so upset, and hurt. And I feel like this is a beyond weird situation. But do I have a right to be upset? I feel like he hasn't cared about her either. Whenever I hang with them if I were to walk in, I'll now always be the girl who slept with her bf.\n\nThey're all using the excuse that he was always the fat, unattractive guy who girls didn't like, and now he doesn't know how to handle his new found 'attractiveness'. I feel like we've all been through that though, and if I were in his situation, I'd make one of the two decisions and keep it that way.", "summary": "Friend slept with me despite liking, and pursuing a relationship with another mutual friend. Do I have a right to be upset?"}
{"id": "t3_4kj1rf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Something weird happened at a party last night - Me [23 F] with my boyfriend [28 M] of 1.5 years", "post": "Last night my boyfriend and I were at my friend's house party. He was playing cards in the living room and I was hanging out in the kitchen but I could still see and hear what was going on. He was sitting next to this girl that we have met a couple of times before but don't regularly hang out with. At one point, she stood up, and apparently her legs were asleep and she fell back onto my boyfriends lap. He grabbed her hips and squeezed them and she sat there for like 3 or 4 seconds before finally getting up and he did nothign to get her off of him. I thought that was a little weird but was willing to let it go...\n\nProbably an hour or so later I went upstairs to go to the bathroom. The girl who was sitting on his lap walked out right as I was walking up to it but just walked right past me without saying anything. I shut the door and went to check behind the curtain to check for murderers (old habits die hard) and my boyfriend was just standing in the shower crouched down. We both screamed and I asked him wtf he was doing in there and he said he didn't know, he was just really drunk. He was supposed to be DD though so he was only going to have a couple of beers and thats really all I saw him drink anyways, he was coming to the kitchen each time he wanted another. It just seems really unlikely that he was somehow drunk enough to be standing in the shower and have no idea what he was doing there. The rest of the night he played up the \"Really drunk\" act and he continued to drink a lot, to the point where he probably actually was really drunk.\n\nIt just seems really suspicious to me but he swears up and down he is telling the truth. When I ask him if he can understand how it looks from my point of view he says he wouldn't be upset because both of those situations were innocent, but I'm not so sure.", "summary": "Girl at party sat on my boyfriends lap and then I went upstairs to find him hiding in the shower right after she came out."}
{"id": "t3_1i843x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it moving too fast for me [19m] to kiss this girl [19f] when I first see her on the second date?", "post": "Okay, like I said I am overthinking things. Normally I do not even think, I just act, but this is the first girl I ACTUALLY like. We had our first date, and I did not kiss her goodbye. I wanted it to be more of a surprise, and not expected. She has visited me every day at work since then, and I have kissed her goodnight.\n\nOur second date is today, and I want to be more prominent with my flirtiness. The first date was getting to know her, and ever since then she was at my work. I want to kiss her immediately when I see her, and since I have kissed her goodnight the past 5 days, I dont really see anything wrong with it.\n\nI just do not want to move this too fast, and I am worried that doing that will.", "summary": "Second date with this girl, and want to kiss her when I first see her. Is that going to be moving too fast?"}
{"id": "t3_paqtx", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Not sure what to do here.", "post": "My current gf and I have been living together for 4 years now, during which she has had a job a total of 10 or 11 months. She's had 3 jobs during these 4 years, 2 of which she quit, 1 she was fired (for not showing up when she was supposed to) and because of this we've had to have roommates to help pay the bills. We are currently discussing getting a place on our own when she finds a job, but I'm not sure I want to risk it given her record of just deciding she doesn't want to go to work. We've talked about this before and she assures me that it won't happen, but I can't shake the feeling. Am I right to be unsure about this or am I just overreacting?", "summary": "gf hasn't been able to hold a job more than 6 months, wants to get a place just the 2 of us when she finds a job, i don't want to be stuck paying all the bills again."}
{"id": "t3_3dxgbf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my Girlfriend [18 F] of 3 months having tension while she away on holiday and its all my fault.", "post": "So my girlfriend had booked two holidays to go away with her friends one to magaluf and one to kavos. Initally i was fine with this as she had booked them before i had known her.\n\nThe first couple of days she had went away on the first holiday it was great, she would call me while her and her friends were getting ready and keep me up to date with how it was going and some funny storys here and there but then after a few nights it died. and me being somewhat clingy i was trying to text her still and got all wound up because i wasnt getting a reply. We'd normally text each other what we called 'cute texts' where we'd basically say how much we miss each other and cant wait too see eachother etc.\n\nshe came back for 2 days before she went on another holiday and so she invited me round hers for one. She was very tired and snappy and did not have a lot of patience. She can normally take good banter and i was just acting like normal and winding her up but i was called an asshole and she slept for most of the night.\n\nI shouldnt of probably went round but she then went away on the other holiday. The only regular contact we had was us trying to keep our snapchat streak going... which consisted of a blank picture of whatever was infront of us and no real conversations.\n\nive told her i missed her a couple of times and rung her once but yesterday i sent her a snapchat saying \"miss you xx\" and she replied with \"stopit xx\". she seems to becoming ever more frustrated with me and i really miss the girl.\n\n Ive talked to a couple of friends that have told me to dump her due to her not seeing it from your point of view and others are saying wait to see how she acts when she comes back.", "summary": "Girlfriend on clubbing holiday has become very distance and short tempered, not as affectionate and lovey dovey before she went opinions/help?"}
{"id": "t3_t1tz9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "First online dating experience. Rating: used", "post": "Edit (at the beginning because I can't read--go me!): I'm 20. The guy in question is 23. I've known him for two months. \n\nSo I decided a few months back to join a dating site because I had seen plenty of success with it among friends and thought I would give it a try. I wasn't planning on anything serious forming from it because I have a tendency to seem like a different (read: cooler, more relaxed, etc) person online. \nSo weeks passed, I talked to some fairly cool people, enjoyed getting a chance to talk to people with different personalities and interests, and then one person messaged me and we instantly clicked. The similarities were astounding: communicating style, interests, political, philosophical, and social beliefs in line. We met IRL, hit it off, hung out a few times, and then he spent the night. We met up 5 times before that, so I didn't think it was moving too fast, plus the physical attraction was there.\nHere we are a week and a half later and I've barely heard from him. He cancelled our last date (hang out? chill time? whatever you want to call it) in favor of going to the bar with his coworkers, and I've attempted to make plans since with no response. \nI suppose the main question here is am I right to feel used? I don't tend to jump towards extreme explanations but it follows, in my mind at least, that his motive in this was sex, and once that was achieved he moved on. It hurts because I thought we really had a chance at a friendship at the very least, due to the ease of conversation, how natural it felt talking to him, things like that.", "summary": "Met a guy online, we hit it off, slept together 5 dates in and now he hasn't talked to me or responded to attempts to make plans in a week and a half. Am I wrong to feel used?"}
{"id": "t3_2w4vqr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my partner [24 F] of two years, considering celibacy to help solve problems caused by my past experiences.", "post": "My ex and I had a very unhealthy relationship sexually, there was a lot of guilt involved. So in my current relations hip I still have all that guilt and fear. I thought time would fix everything, but that hasn't really worked. For a while I felt better, but now I have gone back to being scared every time she touches me. I am still attracted to her. But the fear gets in the way. I don't want to make it worse, but I also don't want to lose her or have her  resent me, and I feel very guilty for even thinking about this, but I am wondering if a break from sexually relations might help. I am running out of ideas. Please anyone with experience or similar problemS tell me what you did. Thank you.", "summary": "Bad relationship in the past causing issues in my sex life now, considering celibacy for a month or two I would like to hear some alternate  solutions or options."}
{"id": "t3_1s7vf1", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "What would you do in", "post": "Me and a few friends are planning on going to Europe shortly and Asia for about four and a half months. The plan would be to start in Belgium, only to see Tomorrowland (a huge music festival). Then we would head to Amsterdam to explore the tourist attraction, this ends the Europe portion of our journey. From there we would fly to India and stay for two weeks, next, Nepal for two weeks. Fly to Laos for two weeks, then make our way into Thailand and spend about a month there. After that we would head to Cambodia for two weeks, then Singapore for three weeks. We would end the trip in Australia and stay for three weeks before heading home. A little less than five months on an ~$12,000 budget, lets say $10,000 to be safe. Where specifically in each country would you go? What would you do? What would you want to see? All of us are very outgoing and into nature. We want to do it all, Full-Moon parties, hiking, scuba-diving, sky-diving, visit some monuments and nature preserves, explore some caves and ancient ruins. The group of us is also not against spending time with locals to learn about culture, traditions and day-to-day life. I've done some research about each country so I have a rough idea of what I'd like to do. But to be able to hear some stories or personal experiences from you guys would be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "India for 2 weeks, Nepal for 2 weeks, Laos for 2 weeks, Thailand for a month, Cambodia for 2 weeks, Singapore for 3 weeks and Australia for 3 weeks. What would you do with a $10,000 budget?"}
{"id": "t3_1a4gob", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (17F) need to find a way to get over him (17M) without spoiling our friendship.", "post": "I met this guy eight years ago when we both started playing the same instrument. Ever since then I've always a bit of a crush on him. I've dated other guys and he's dated other girls, but these last few months when we have both been single, I reaaaallly fell for him. Like, pining over him. ( I realize how stereotypical this sounds coming from a teenage girl, but it's what's happening.) Today, after months of mixed signals, a negative prom response then apology for said response, many turned down date invites, and flirting on both our parts; I finally poured out my feelings for him. I expressed how amazing I think he is and all I got in response was a \"thank you gurll\". He outright told me he thinks of me as his best friend and that's all. So I realize I need to move on and get over him without spoiling our friendship (such as distancing myself and not talking to him). I think at this point I'll always just be his friend and nothing more. Reddit, how do you suggest I get over my feelings for him? Because honestly right now, I'm a mess.", "summary": "I realllllyyy like a guy (17M), but know he doesn't have feelings for me (17F). How do I get over it without killing the friendship? "}
{"id": "t3_3j7h6e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 F] with my bf [26 M] of almost 7 years, has had incredibly difficult trust issues...due to his constant online cheating throughout the years.", "post": "My bf of almost 7 years has always had reaally bad trust and jealousy issues from the jump...i at first didnt understand but he explained to me his first love (which was long term) cheated on him quite traumatically. I thought with patience and reassurance from my loyalty would help him to learn to put down his guards and trust again throughout the years.....but it hasn't..\n\nHis jealousy and paranoia has taken quite a toll on me and my relationships....everytime i go out he thinks im cheating or being deceitful...and i have been nothing but loyal and honest with him...and he will still never fully trust me...\n\nTo add onto that....he has emotionally cheated on me many times either through people i know or online dating..and in turn has now made me paranoid and insecure and jealous...as well...and i am constantly fighting these demons\n\nI dont even know why I'm here explaining all this because its probably clear to everyone I shouldnt be with him....but we are together and want things to work. We have been through quite a lot and do share a deep history and love  for eachother like family and know our relationship is flawed and has a lot of obstacles to overcome....im just curious to hear others stories...i dont really want to be told im being dumb etc because i can hear that all day from my friends so that is why i am on reddit.", "summary": "Im just wondering has anyone else have a similar experienc and if so have you had success in overcoming these issues in a relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_4fek7k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (28M) broke up with my (25F) girlfriend of 9 months last night and I'm completely heart broken. All I want to do now is get back together with her but I'm not sure if that is the right thing.", "post": "This is the first long term relationship I've had. I dated a girl shortly in highschool but then I joined the army. I was too busy training and deploying and living in a state I hated so I never made an effort to date back then. After the army, I went to college and dated a bunch of girls but never found one I was happy with.\n\nDuring my last year of college, however, I found a great girl that I hit it off with right away. She had a boyfriend at the time but eventually dumped him and moved closer to where I lived. We became bf and gf and she has pretty much slept over at my house every night since she moved. \n\nI'm the type of guy that needs a lot of space and alone time and it has been a reoccurring issue in our relationship, where I want more alone time but she is unhappy when we are apart. I decided to sacrifice my personal space to make it work because she is so great but it does make things hard sometimes.\n\nAnother thing that had been bothering me, the most important, is that I didn't know if I was in love with her. We would always say I love you to each other and it always felt right, but then part of me wonders if I'm actually in love and that I might be too inexperienced to know what love is. I often thought about breaking up because of this. \n\nBut now, after last nights break up, I'm absolutely crushed and heartbroken. There's nothing I want to do more than tell her I love her with all my heart and get her back. I really feel this right now but I don't know if this feeling will last if we get back together. I don't know what to do.", "summary": "I have been unsure about my feelings for my first long term girlfriend of 9 months and now that we have broken up, I am completely heart broken and want her back. Not sure if getting back together is the right thing to do."}
{"id": "t3_1vz4nc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Good friend [F, 24] who is in a relationship started to behave weirdly towards me [M, 24]. Why?", "post": "I have a good friend who is currently in a relationship with other guy. We were usually having a good time, laughing a lot, talking about stuff, but recently her behaviour towards me changed quite a bit. She responds to my questions with short answers, tries to ignore my jokes, conversations feel awkward and overall it looks like she is trying to keep distance from me. I can occasionally catch her off guard and things are back to normal, but only for a short period of time. \n\nTo me it feels like she likes me or falls for me(or whats that word), but she doesn't want to end her current relationship. Could it be the cause of her behaviour? Or what else? How do I change things back to normal?", "summary": "Good friend suddenly started to behave weirdly towards me. Why? Is it because she likes me?(My probably wrong guess )"}
{"id": "t3_2ta02v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] can't figure out how to know if I really connect with someone.", "post": "I've been in plenty of short lived relationships before but I just can't seem to differentiate if they are real feelings or feelings I'm forcing myself to have because I am lonely.\n\nI have a really big trust issue because of my mother being a cheater and dragging me into her other relationships when I was young. Also, being in the military I see how quick people are to cheat on and lie to their SO.\n\nI am a really emotional yet reserved person, if that makes any sense? I also have anger issues, which I have been working on but it isn't an easy journey. I try to keep a distance from people because of these reasons and I know I can't be in a happy relationship unless I am happy with myself.\n\nEven though I feel that way, I still feel null and void of so many feelings. It makes it hard for me to truly connect with someone, because I feel like I do it out of loneliness or boredom. I've been through a lot in life already so I think way too much for my own good and I'm a lot to handle.\n\nI'm not trying to rush for a true love or anything like that. I just don't know if I'm even capable of realizing when I really have feelings for someone. \n\nPlus it doesn't help that I'm a lesbian and it hasn't been the easiest road for me.", "summary": "Can't figure out if my feelings are true or just out of boredom. Any advice? Is there something wrong with me?"}
{"id": "t3_4spqm7", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Please help - My employer is selling and the new employment contract is crazy", "post": "My employer announced today that they sold the company. They passed out the new employment contracts and there are some awful no-compete and IP sections (everything you do outside the office belongs to the company regardless).\n\nThe compensation is the same as it was before, but the employment contract brings forth some very nasty differences from the environment/agreement I have been working under for the past 6 years.\n\nI tried to negotiate a very small modification to the contract and got shot down.\n\nI tried to negotiage slightly higher (industry standard) wages to compensate for the negative changes and got shot down.\n\nThey are giving us 48 hours to make a decision. Keeping my same rate of pay and agreeing to this crazy contract is not in my best interest.\n\nQuestion: Would I be eligible to receive unemployment while I look for another job?", "summary": "Company got bought out, new contract is insane, I will be unemployed if I don't agree to new contract within 48 hours - would I be eligible for unemployment?"}
{"id": "t3_3ctuak", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by answering honestly to my little brother", "post": "My little brother is 8 years old. I have always taught him to ask me any questions and that I'd promise to always answer to the best of my ability with no consequent.\n\nSo there we were, shopping in the mall when he randomly asked me \"What does prostituted mean?\". I was taken aback since I know what type of books and videos he watches, so I wouldn't expect him to hear this word. But nonetheless, I begin to explain to him what 'prostituted' and 'prostitution' mean.\n\nI start to explain to him that people really love sex and what 'sex' actually is. I continue to expound that some people love sex a lot but don't have girlfriends/boyfriends/SO/etc to have sex with. Therefore, there are people who offer themselves in return for money or other favors for sex in return. And therefore, they're prostituting themselves.\n\nHe has a dumbfounded look on his face after... He then asked me Why would people be \"prostituted\" to the fullest extent of the law for stealing then. I then notice the sign across from us stating 'you will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law for theft'.\n\nI lose my cool here. I yell at my brother \"YOU LITTLE SHIET, ITS PROSECUTED, NOT PROSTITUTED. LEARN TO READ DIPSHEIT!\"", "summary": "TIFU by having the sex talk with my little brother because he asked me what 'prostituted' mean when he actually meant 'prosecuted'."}
{"id": "t3_1ivr82", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "am i wrong for wantin to feel validated in my relationship?", "post": "I [f/23] am in a relationship and have been in it on and off for awhile [since early teens].\n\nI was explaining to my partner [m/24] the other day that I wanted to feel \"worshipped\" by the person I'm with. This in not in an I am amazing or selfish kind of way but in a way that I feel like he wants me and I mean a lot to him and that I feel validated WITHIN the relationship itself. I say this cause I believe he doesn't act in a way that shows that the relationship is important to him. \n\nWhen I said this he told me that I seem like all I want is for him to validate me all the time as a person to make me feel complete. \n\nAt this I try not to get angry because I feel like I know who I am and am happy with who I am and would be validated as an individual person without the relationship. i just would like him to do more things that make me feel like I am appreciated within the relationship and that the relationship is a priority. \n\nOscar Wilde said \"we should never love anyone who treats us like we are ordinary\"\n\nBy asking my partner to \"worship\" me and do things that show me i am important, am I being unfair?", "summary": "I would like my partner to do more things that's show me that our relationship is important to him, without him thinking it is just cause I need to be validated as a person by this relationship. Am I wrong for wanting this?"}
{"id": "t3_3apvxa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my coworker [early 50s M] for 5 years. We worked at the same level 5 years ago. I went to another company, moved up, and now returned to the previous company as his boss. He's not taking it too well.", "post": "So now I'm his boss, but he goes over my head to my boss and others above me about with issues instead of going through me, he tries to take charge of situations and push me out, he doesn't inform me on issues that are occurring, and he seems annoyed when I ask him to do something. Other co-workers have noticed it and joke with us about it...they'll say something like \"give that to your boss\" and he'll say \"pft\". It's getting annoying. What makes it tougher is that we were really cool back when we were at the same level. So that friendship carries over to now and we talk about common interests frequently. But when it comes to work it's different. I sympathize though. I understand it may hit his ego pretty hard to have to work for someone half his age that was previously his equal. But it's affecting my work and reputation. I already asked him nicely to stop going over my head. He wasn't too happy about it and that only lasted a week. I'm getting to where I want to stop being friendly about it and tell him that I'm his boss and he needs to do what I tell him to, but I'm afraid that will piss him off and he'll try to make my life miserable. Perhaps I should mention it to my boss. What do you think?", "summary": "Previous coworker now works for me. He's not happy about it and goes over my head and tries to run my team. It's getting annoying and makes me look bad. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1fub0d", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I want to find out something about my girlfriend without her realizing it, any help?", "post": "Before anything, not a sad story or anything, I don't think she's cheating or anything of the sorts. My country's equivalent to Valentine's Day is coming and I had this pretty simple idea to surprise my girlfriend and it would involve giving her some roses. The thing is, although I know she would appreciate my intention in and of itself, I don't know if she would like the actual flowers and such, so I wanted to find out if she likes roses and if she would like getting some, but without her realizing it so as not to spoil the surprise. Any ideas on how to get that information out of her?", "summary": "I wanna find out if my girlfriend likes roses without her realizing my underlining intentions of surprising her with some. Ideas?"}
{"id": "t3_3257ta", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "How do you fit social drinking into a healthy lifestyle?", "post": "Hi Loseit!\n\nThis subreddit has helped me make some drastic changes to my lifestyle, but there's one thing that I have a constant struggle with that I need a little advice on. I tend to eat around 1200-1300 calories per day and exercise daily (cario + weight training). My goal is less numbers-based and more about feeling healthy and getting in shape, as I am already at a healthy weight for my height. In contrast, my SO (in the \"obese\" range at 6'1\" and 235lbs, used to be 180lbs freshman year, but gained all the weight after he joined a fraternity due to the drinking culture) constantly says that he wants to lose weight, but so far he has only been making minimal effort by means of eating a little better and going to the gym a couple times a week with me. \n\nWe're both in college and in Greek life, so something that's central to our social lives is drinking. During this past semester, I've been mostly sober, but it's getting harder and harder to tell my friends why I'm not drinking because they don't take me seriously. On top of this, my SO feels like we should drink with our friends since it's our last semester and begs me to drink with him, but he rarely stays within a reasonable number of drinks, often averaging 7-8 beers or mixed drinks in a night. \n\nDoes anyone have experience dealing with situations like this? What can I do to get my SO to stop binge drinking and ruining the minimal progress he makes each week? And how do I help him to see that making changes to our lifestyle is the best way to lose weight? Any tips or advice would be great because I've been stressed out about this for weeks!", "summary": "SO feels like we should drink heavily every weekend because we're graduating soon and we're in Greek life, but it stresses me out because it's undoing all the healthy changes we're trying to make. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2atsxn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with my [30M] 4 months - SO posting pictures of another woman?", "post": "Hi Reddit,\n\nI'm posting this here in hopes that I'm not overreacting over something completely stupid.  I (28F) have been dating my boyfriend (30M) for about four months.  He has been posting pictures of his gorgeous coworker on his instagram, she's posting back hearts, and it's starting to make me feel sick.  It would be one thing if he had told me that he's in love with me and I suppose I wouldn't feel so insecure - I'm pretty laid back, but she's really hot, and it's just striking me as being not cool under the circumstances.\n\nI was thinking that I would nicely say, \"I can't help but notice that you're posting a lot of pictures of that girl.  I don't mean to let it bother me, but it makes me feel like she's important to you in some way which makes me feel pretty awful on many levels\".  I don't even know.  Part of me just wants to peace out.  I'm too old for this and I already feel like I've had my heart trampled.  \n\nHas anyone ever had to deal with something like this?  Did it ultimately mean impending doom for the relationship?  Do you think that my approach is appropriate, or am I overreacting?", "summary": "Boyfriend of four months posting tons of pictures of his very attractive female coworker on instagram and it's making me very uncomfortable.  How to handle an uncomfortable, depressing situation?"}
{"id": "t3_2xt77m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "At what point do I just assume that she [24 F] is just not going to respond to my [24 M] text asking her out on a third date?", "post": "Quick background: We met via a dating app and after a few days of chatting decided to meet up for brunch (her idea) two weekends ago for a first date. I was bit hesitant about brunch for a first meetup due to the time commitment in case it became awkward/uninteresting etc. but it turned out to be one of the best first dates I've been on. Conversation flowed really naturally and we had a lot in common and overall we both had a lot of fun. \n\nWe agreed that we should do it again and after a couple of rescheduling conflicts (we both have pretty busy jobs) met up for a bite drinks after work last Thursday. Again, conversation was great and we had a fun time and even talked about what we should do next time we went out together. \n\nI texted her Sunday asking if she wanted to check out this cool bar we both heard of (one of the places we talked about going to on date 2) and haven't heard from her since. I consider myself pretty good at getting social cues and taking hints, but am wondering if somewhere along the lines I just screwed this up. I've been on plenty of dates before, so unless i completely misread her vibe, i know when they go well and when they don't and every indication so far was that it was former. We're both really busy at work so that could definitely be a big factor as to the non-response, but at the same time she's been pretty responsive to texts before. The last time i heard from her was Friday, when we exchanged a couple of random texts during the workday. I sent the last text that day so it's been two messages with no response.\n\nAt what point do i just move on and assume she did a 180? Is it worth texting her again? I just dont want to fall into the trap of being that guy that is constantly texting her as the next one will be the third text i send to her in a row.", "summary": "Been on two dates with this girl where we both had fun and during date two agreed there would be a third date. Asked her out via text two days ago and havent heard back."}
{"id": "t3_xxce5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(27f) Should I spare my boyfriend (30m) the trouble of dealing with me?", "post": "I have never been diagnosed with anything, but I am an extremely anxious person.  On the plus side, it has made me very high-achieving; on the negative side, I am generally pretty unhappy and minor setbacks are extremely hard for me to deal with.  I have recently started seeing a therapist, but I think she can probably only do so much.\n\nToday is a good example.  I made a minor mistake at work, and have spent the entire day fighting back tears and tearing myself up.  I am completely miserable and nothing is going to make me feel better.\n\nI love him, and I love our relationship.  But he is nothing like this, and I feel like he should not have to deal with my horrible moodiness forever.  I am terrified that when we have kids it will only get worse (have had bad reactions to hormonal birth control in the past).\n\nShould I just spare him the trouble?  I feel like he deserves so much better.", "summary": "I drive myself crazy with my anxiety, wondering if it's unfair to inflict it on my boyfriend for the rest of his life."}
{"id": "t3_558ma4", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "moving out and my car is dying.", "post": "Hello PF! \n\nBeen a reddit lurker for a few weeks and i figured now i will make an account to ask for some guidance as i feel a little lost in my current situation.\n\nI am a 21 year old male living on long island working an 8-5 office job and going to college twice a week (last class till i can graduate with my associates). I currently own a old beater car with alot of problems and im constantly scared its going to die on me. On top of that I have to be out of my house by january. I make $14 an hour, roughly 400 a week now with school, have only $2000 saved for an emergency and a credit card with a $2000 limit i only want to use for emergencies. I honsetly have no idea what to do. Im saving every penny possible until ja uary so i can try and get a decent living situation as well as a new car but it just doesnt seem possibe.", "summary": "i have $2000 in saving, need a new car and a new place to live. What course of action would yoi recommend?"}
{"id": "t3_29f78w", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "600$ in quarters", "post": "I have found that I can save quartars but I have a little trouble saving much else. Well 600$ in quarters is probably a bit much and id like to invest it. I also have about 2000 dollars that I need to get away from myself. And then if I invest all this I would also like to invest about 50-75 a week on top of that. So I guess I need something easy to add to, and completely separate from my retirement.\n\nAnother thing while I'm on personal finance is that I have a collection in 2010 that wasn't reported untiln 2013 . It's for a gym membership that I cancelled multiple times and dutifully I've tried to get it taken off my reports every year. So for now to try to establish some good credit I've got a secured card through a credit union, and a secured loan as well both for 500$. I also have 2store credit cards that I use every 3 months or so. Is there any no fee credit card companies that PF knows that I could apply for? My credit score is about 580. Anything that could bump up my credit would be awesome.", "summary": "would like to invest 2600$ somewhere I could add to easily, but that would be slightly more difficult to take out. Investing period being about 5years."}
{"id": "t3_3asohy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] thought I would be okay with being FWB with my ex [21 F] but I am conflicted", "post": "So I suggested to my ex, who I have recently gotten back in touch with, that maybe she could spend the night over at my house. She's a really great girl and I know she still has a lot of strong feelings for me. \n\nShe acts like she doesn't mind just being friends with benefits, but I know she does and would want a relationship with me if I was open to it. But honestly I don't feel like getting into a relationship because my life is really fucked up and weird right now. Also she is going through a some shit and I don't want to take advantage of her in anyway because I do care about her. Also she is very into sex being an emotional thing rather than just a fun thing.\n\nBut I am really conflicted. Would sleeping with her just make her want a relationship more? I don't want to hurt her, and yeah it would be nice...but do you think it would make her feel worse?", "summary": "ex gf says she's ok with being fwb but she still wants to be in a relationship and i don't want to hurt her"}
{"id": "t3_1ls2gj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "29/f with 25/m, 9 months. Need positive encouragement from redditors regarding our transition to long-distance!", "post": "My boyfriend and I have a great relationship. We don't live together but we live in the same city and see each other often.\n\nHe's just got his dream job in the US and once the visa is sorted will be moving there. He says he will stay for 2 years or so and then come back to be with me. He also says he's dedicated to me and that he won't let the distance ruin our relationship.\n\nWhile I believe truly that he means these things, I've been roughed up around the edges before about loves lost and have a failed long-distance relationship in my past.  I am having a huge amount of trouble accepting that our relationship can last.  He says my negativity is getting him down about it, and that if anything will ruin it, it will be my wet blanket.\n\nRedditors, can it work? Please share some positive helpful stories about long-distance that's really turned out for the best. I hear so much that goes wrong, and have had bad experiences. I need to channel a better outlook about this!", "summary": "Boyfriend moving abroad for work in a couple of months. I'm terrified that things won't work out. I've only heard the bad stories. Should I have faith and trust it will be okay?"}
{"id": "t3_h6n13", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Skills Verification Exam for Programming position?", "post": "So I have a skills verification exam for an entry level programming position coming up soon, and Im curious what it's like and what questions are asked. I did incredibly well on every programming class I took (Computer Science major) and have a really good handle and understanding of C++ with a good bit of C and C#. However, It's been a while since I've looked at some/many topics and given the time frame it's not practical for me to refresh myself on 2-3 years of programming. The things Im fuzzy on I know that I would be like \"Oh Yeah!\" the moment I got inside MSVS or went to actually start working on something but on a pen and paper exam I wont have the resources or time to make that happen. Just trying to get an idea of what I have in store for me.", "summary": "Exam on programming coming up for a job position, a little worried as Im fuzzy on things I havent touched in a while and wondering what's on them."}
{"id": "t3_2sn231", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with my boyfriend [32M] and I no longer like his caress.", "post": "I'm sorry if this in the wrong sub. My boyfriend and I are in a dead bedroom. We used to have great sex like six times a week. It was passionate, hot and heavy. It was wonderful and amazing. I don't think I've ever \"made love\" until I was with him. We have a great relationship. He is so caring and sweet. He always wants to cuddle, cooks for me, surprises me with gifts, and just other nice things. When I'm with him I feel like the only person in the world to him (lame I know).   \n  \nSex now has been dwindling. And now it's four times a month, or three times a month. This month it has only been once and the month is almost over. I feel bad for counting but I this is something that I have been deprived of for almost a year. We have talked about it a few times on why his sex drive is down. He now has a stressful job with is very understaffed. I understand that but he masturbates so much. Now, I know it is much easier just to have wank than to have sex. I'm guilty of it, you the reader probably is to. I've tried many things to try and initiate sex, sexy outfits, new sexy underwear, some role play. I'm tired of masturbating and I'm now so irritable. Lots of little things just set me off and I know I need some sexual relief.  \n  \nNow I've come to the point where his touch no longer excites me. I actually don't want him to touch me. He usually grabs me. He'll grab my ass, my tits, and my whole body in a sensual way but it always goes nowhere. Now I don't want him to touch me. I don't like when he does, I almost always pull away.  \n   \nMy question is how do we get back to normal? Is this normal that I don't want him to touch me? Is the only solution to break up? I don't want to break up, we just signed a lease together.  Everything is so great, he's so much more than my lover, he's my best friend.", "summary": "I'm in a dead bedroom situation. Perfect relationship except for sex. His touch is no longer wanted by me, is this normal?"}
{"id": "t3_28fqhd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She [16F] keeps lying and hiding serious things from me [17M]. We are together for 2 years now. Should i keep up?", "post": "For the last 1 year and some months, she's been doing wrong things from my back and hiding it from me. Things like: flerting with other guys, taking semi-nude pictures with her girlfriend, talking with people i've already said i don't want her to talk to, etc. And then, when i ask her if she did any of this, she goes ahead and says \"no\". So i take out my proofs, like \"it's on your fucking phone! I saw it!\". And then she proceeds to complain about me getting too much into her personal live, stalking her and stuff. Well, the only reason i do that is because she keeps fucking up.\n\nNow, she already said to me a million times that she's going to change for better, and that i should give her \"one more last chance\". I honestly already gave her more last chances that i can remember right now. Her last fuckup was flerting with a guy on skype, saying things like \"we should watch this tv show on bed together, i would love it\". This was the last straw to me and now i want to break up, and once again she says she will change. Now, should i give her another chance?", "summary": "Girlfriend is a lier who keeps fucking things up and saying that she will change, but never does. Last time, fucked up real big and now wants another chance. Should i give it?"}
{"id": "t3_13beh7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Stupid lie... what to do?", "post": "My girlfriend (27) and I (M 26) have been together for a little over a year and are now living together. \n\nOur relationship is going great, but I lied to her and now I'm not so sure about what to do.\n\nA while back when we were back home (home for me, we live in her hometown 10 hours away from mine) we were at a party with a bunch of my friends. She asked me if anything ever happened between me and a specific female friend and I said no.\n\nThe truth is, between the ages of 18 and 21, we slept together maybe 4-5 times total. It was never anything between me and that friend. More of an ultimate backup if we both didn't have sex for a long time.\n\nBecause of the living situation, we see that friend maybe once a year. Also what happened between us was so long ago and so minimal that I don't know if I should just come clean or not.\n\nLooking back, I think I lied because when she asked I realized I should have mention this before we arrived at the party and I didn't want to blindside her.\n\nNow I'm torn because I'm not sure how she would react if I told her. Plus everything else is going really well between us.", "summary": "Lied to my girlfriend about sleeping with a female friend a while back. Nothing between us since way before I met my girlfriend. Should I come clean?"}
{"id": "t3_ig6tw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Choosing apartments - Living above a store/restaurant", "post": "Me and my girlfriend are planning on moving out mid-july to beginning of August. Finding the right place has really been a pain in the ass. It's only the beginning of the month, but we found two suitable places:\n\nApartment 1: Looks recently renovated and very clean. The sinks and the appliances were very new.  The landlord seemed very kind and caring about the building. However, one of the big drawbacks bugging me is that it's located above a store/restaurant. The entrance was separate, but around the corner in a weird spot. It's also a bit smaller than I wanted, and lacked storage space. There are no laundry facilities in the building but there is a Laundromat one only a couple blocks away. \n\nApartment 2: This one was very large for a great price. Although do like it as well, my girlfriend is a little iffy about this one. Some things were a bit beat-up, mainly the hardwood floors. Older appliances but I don't mind. The landlord was kind but I'm not sure how well kept thing will be in the long run. The building in no way looked dirty, but it did look like things could be repaired here and there. There are a few small chips and cracks on the walls, which worries us because we live in a city where bedbugs roam. We worry about those and other bugs coming in that way. I do feel like our view of this one is skewed because we viewed it before they had a chance to clean and paint it.\n\nOur other option is to wait out for other units to become available elsewhere. I'm just afraid of leaving things too long as places have been snatched from me the same day I viewed them. Both places are in the area we like, but I feel like it's a bargain between new renovations vs. size. \n\nWhat do you think? Apartment 1 or 2? Or wait out for another option? Has living above stores/restaurants been a problem for anyone else?", "summary": "Need to pick a new place. Older place+large space vs. Smaller place+newly rennovated."}
{"id": "t3_31jsrk", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "United First Class Upgrade bait and switch", "post": "On 3/31 I went to upgrade the outbound flight on myreservation to First Class- in the amount of $190.98 each for 2 seats (total $381.98).\n\nImmediately after checkout I went to select seats and saw that I could upgrade my return flight to first class for $50 per seat ($100 total). i checked out with my credit card for the second time and selected my seats. I verified on my credit card that there were 2 pending charges from United: $381.98 & $100. I noticed today that the $100 charge has changed to $381.98. \n\nUpon calling customer service and speaking to 2 different people for over an hour, I was told it was a glitch in the online system that showed $50 first class upgrade and they could not honor the price. \n\nI was told the system would not allow them to honor the $50 per seat upgrade. I suggested that in lieu of a refund, I would accept a travel credit in the amount owed to me ($281.98), but they said I had to send feedback through their site.\n\nI fly exclusively United and am a very loyal customer, and I am flabbergasted that such a huge company would bait and switch me like they have done. Showing me $100 then jacking it up to $381.98. \n\nI'm assuming I have no real recourse?", "summary": "United baited me with a $50/seat 1st class upgrade, then charged my credit card $190/seat. Won't honor original price..."}
{"id": "t3_ov1dy", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So Apparently I have a great voice", "post": "Hi friends,\n\nSo I've had multiple people come up to me and say \"You have a great voice\".  Not a great singing voice, just a nice, easy to listen to, talking voice.  The range of my voice is also pretty good as well, able to hit high and low notes on command.  I have even had a few people tell me that I should \"go be the voice of something\".  \n\nI alway just kind of laughed it off, but the other day I thought maybe I would see if I really do have a unique voice.  I'm 25 years old, i've never taken any sort of acting/drama class, I currently have a great career, and i'm just now deciding that this might be cool to try out.  Anyone with some advice on where to go from here?", "summary": "My voice is unique, many people say it's special, I'm interested in finding out if that is actually true and if I could use this voice at some point in my career."}
{"id": "t3_30psb4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Recently I [25 M] has started ERPing with a friend [26 F]. She is married and it's all RPing, but I get jealous when she does it with other people online. Can't sort out my feelings.", "post": "So several months ago I met a friend through a MMO.  I played with her and her husband and we gradually got closer as friends over time.  A few weeks ago, it comes out that she enjoys erotic role playing and asks me if I want to try it out.\n\nThings go great, but I then ask about her husband and what he thinks about all this.  She says it's cool and that he is totally fine with it.  We do with several more times and she even goes as far as to tell me what her and her husband have done on several occasions.\n\nHowever, this is a problem now.  I feel like I'm starting to get jealous of her when she does the same with other partners.  When she talks about what she does with her husband, I don't feel anything though.  \n\nIs this normal?  I'm having a hard time sorting out my feelings on the matter.  If I liked her, would I not also be jealous of her and her husband?  Am I secretly a clinger?  I just feel angry at myself for feeling this way most of the time.", "summary": "Started RPing with a friend, jealous of her online partners but not of her husband.  Having trouble sorting my feelings out, help?"}
{"id": "t3_4h3d5a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] have been told by my friend [24 M] (of about a year) that they have feelings for me. However, I am not interested and they are not getting the message.", "post": "So, I'm a leader in an on campus club at my university. About a week ago my friend, Cameron, (who is male but uses female pronouns) has recently told me that she has developed \"*deep, real, and excessive*\" feelings for me over the course of the past year. \n\nI simply explained that I am straight and not interested, that it doesn't change our friendship, and I take the confession of feelings as a compliment (as to not try and make things weird between us because she is my friend). A couple of days go by without contact or seeing each other on campus (it's finals week and everyone is on weird schedules) but eventually we see each other in the cafeteria. We have a short chat and part ways until as I left she calls out my name and blows me a kiss from across the room, which I had no real response in mind other than just to nod and walk off. In the past couple of days when we've seen each other, she's been very close and personal (more so than before she announced her feelings) and has constantly been complimenting me (also did not do before this event). Ever since the talk, she's just been over the top flirty and making me feel more uncomfortable.\n\nBasically, she doesn't really gets the message that I'm not interested, even after I plainly spelled it out. I'm not sure how to go about this, because I'm also trying to be a friend and not come across as mean or a jerk (and I'm supposed to be a role model to my campus group).", "summary": "My (22M) friend (24M) has announced they have feelings for me, but I'm not interested. However friend does not get the message and I need to get it across while not being mean/jerkish."}
{"id": "t3_3fkgpk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My Wife (F25) and I started a company together & she is upset because I listed on my website & resume that \"I founded\" it. She wants me to fix it. Am I in completely the wrong?", "post": "Her argument is that since we both started it we are both technically co-founders. To be a founder means that there was only one individual in the beginning. I feel like she really encouraged me to start it, but that I did most of the work in the beginning getting it going & she more so took on the role of getting people involved. She said she feels like me putting up that I founded the company completely takes away her role in it and she's very hurt. \n\nIs she overreacting? I didn't see it that way, but am I wrong to have done that?", "summary": "Wife is upset with me for stating that I founded a company that we both had a part in, I'm not sure if she's over reacting or if this is an actual error on my part."}
{"id": "t3_4ps8h5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] ex [22M] little brother [8M] keeps messaging me asking when I am coming to hang out again. I don't know how to handle this because I don't want to be mean to the kid", "post": "Hi Reddit, so this sounds kind of pathetic issue but I have no idea to do. I am dealing with an 8 year old child who absolutely adores me who is my exes little brother. Whenever I would go over to his parents' house he would want to play with me. He really likes me and he would always ask when I was going to Marry his brother. He would always show me his work from school and ask for my help. He has two other sisters who adore him as well, I always noticed they like their little brother a lot more than they did my ex. My ex and his sisters do not get along at all  \n\nMy ex and I broke up because he cheated on me when he went on a business trip to Las Vegas (probably another lie he told). His excuse was \"I had to get some pussy somewhere\". He was gone for a week and we had sex twice on the day he left. So if he can't save sex for a week then I don't know what to tell you. \n\nHis brother keeps texting me from the home phone (it's the household cell phone, it is there for someone to call home if that makes sense). He asks me when am I coming over to play, when are we going to play video games again. The whole deal and I feel really bad for ignoring him. He really likes me and I would love to hang out with him/babysit him again sometime. That would mean having to potentially see or talk to my ex and I can't stand him. I can't stand the sight of him. \n\nHow do I deal with this?", "summary": "My exes little brother adores me and he keeps texting me asking when I am coming over to hang out/play again and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_loi08", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "A company has asked be to get a FBI background check, but they haven't really told me how.  Is that weird?", "post": "So, I've been looking into teaching English abroad, and I've been in contact with the company called Travel and Teach Recruiting.  They've told me that to go abroad, I need to get an FBI background check.  They gave me a link to the FBI webpage and told me to get back to them when I had gotten it taken care of.  However, they didn't give me a fingerprint card and they never really explained to me what exactly I do.  Well, I've been to the police station, and I've called the FBI, and they all said that this sounds suspicious.  Apparently, companies almost always give you a card and detailed information.  Without a card and certain information, I can't really get the check done.  However, when I called the company, they just told me to try talking to the police again and that they should be able to help.  So, I don't really know what to think.  I haven't paid this company anything, so I don't think I'm getting scammed.  But what they're telling me contradicts what everyone else is telling me.  What do you guys think?", "summary": "A recruiting company told me to get an FBI check, but didn't explain how or give me a fingerprint card.  The police say that's weird."}
{"id": "t3_192k9e", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Getting all my wisdom teeth pulled in 10 hours. Any last minute tips?", "post": "Just nervous about it. Anything helps.\n\nFOLLOW UP:  Thanks for all of the tips.  I was taking all of them to heart. It was quite an experience today.  Mainly because I didn't end up getting them pulled.  I got to the office and they started giving me the drugs to prep for the surgery when a dentist who I had never met introduced himself and said he would be the one performing the operation.  o_O wtf??  He looks at the xrays on file while I'm sitting in the chair letting the drugs slowly take effect (which I don't think they were) for an HOUR!  They were constantly checking on me asking how I was then finally the dentist comes back and says that they have to send me to a different office to get a different type of xray, and that I would have to pay out of pocket.  WTF? He said it was important because he was not sure if he would be comfortable pulling my teeth because they would be really difficult to get out.  So my wife drives me over to this other office where we get the x-ray done then head back.  Once back he takes a look at the xray and says, well I am not confident that I can get one of them out, and the others will be difficult but I can do them.... btw I am already livid.  He says I should really go to a surgeon and see what they think, so I say \"OK write me a referral and I'll go get a second opinion on all 4 teeth\"  Suddenly he backpedals saying, \"well I think I can do three of them\" to which I reply \"You think? Sorry, but that's just not good enough for me.\"  I get the referral and walk out.", "summary": "Lost all faith in the skills of the guy who wanted to rip the teeth out of my mouth.  Walked out and will be getting a second opinion about whether it's even necessary to pull them out."}
{"id": "t3_1b6kwj", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Can a Traumatized Dog be Helped?", "post": "One year ago, I came home to see a skeleton of a hound dog stumbling all over my pastures.  I didn't have anything to catch her with, but I am a sucker for animals in need and tried anyway.  It took an hour of walking up and down the same fence before she just collapsed and I \"caught\" her.  We took her to the vet for two broken front paws, but nothing else was wrong with her.\n\nShe was so scared of everything, the slightest sound made her take off literally shitting herself.  A whisper could make her cower in the corner and pee everywhere.  My neighbor also told me he'd seen her thrown out of a truck the day before.  So I kept her, afraid she would be put down if I took her to anyone else.\n\nIt's been a year of taking sweetly, lots of food and treats, going on walks, befriending my other dogs, and sitting and petting her for long periods of time.  *A year.*  She still won't come to anyone but me, and she only started coming to me in the last couple of months, and being very nervous when she does.  She's still terrified of noises, movement, and pee's around anyone else.  She runs so much to avoid (even though they're not interested) my family and friends that feeding her three times a day still has her looking like a skeleton and sleeps standing up during the day to be ready to bolt again.  We had to triple reinforce the fence to keep her in because she continuously rams it to get out in a panic, cutting herself up once in a while, when one of us walks into the yard.  She doesn't even make eye contact, and flips out when she bumps into something like a chair.\n\nI still don't want her to go elsewhere and risk a bad or no future since I know she is really a sweet and loyal dog under all the mess, but I am moving to start over in a couple of months and want her to come with us and start over, too...\n\nIs there anything more I can do for her?  :(", "summary": "Out of all my rescue animals, this dog is the toughest. A year of sweet care later, she is still piss-herself-terrified of anyone, any movement, any sound. What else can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_34v27r", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by talking too loud", "post": "Whatup /r/tifu?\nSo I fucked up by talking too loud publicly. I was standing with a classmate at the busstation and was talking about the next few weeks. The next few weeks are pretty tough for the students in Switzerland, because we're getting closer to the finals. In addition to that our teachers decided to give us a shit load of homework. \nSo we both were complaining about how annyoing this is and out of the conversation I dropped the phrase: \"We're getting fucked harder than in an american prison!\" My classmate got the metaphor, but a man who always is on the same bus in the moring like I am probably just heard this one sentence. After I've said the last word I saw him kinda disturbed looking at me. So he will probably remember me as the \"getting fucked in a american prison guy\".", "summary": "spoke too loud at the busstation, now will be remembered as the guy who got fucked in an american prison."}
{"id": "t3_g2uri", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Should I do anything? Re: sharing ideas after a job interview.", "post": "I interviewed for a job as a moderator for a start-up website in NYC. The website was down the day prior and the day of my interview so I wasn't able to really play around with it.\n\nAfter my lengthy interview I sent a thank you email. I didn't hear anything back but I decided to sign up for the website and give some feedback. A week later I sent my interviewer a decent sized email about things I liked and areas I thought could be improved.\n\nI never received a response but I did notice that there was a poll asking about one of my suggestions and the general consensus was favorable. I thought this was very odd because I never heard back from them until the other day (weeks later) stating that I did not get the job.\n\nI somewhat felt that the interviewer might have just taken my ideas and presented them as her own? Is that common? Should I just continue to brush it off and move on because I feel that I am not really in a position to do anything. Just felt that it was somewhat messed up.", "summary": "Should I do anything? I submitted some ideas about a website after a job interview. Didn't get the job but they appear to be entertaining one of my ideas."}
{"id": "t3_17irlo", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Any advice on taking back possession of a recovered stolen firearm while on misdemeanor drug probation?(FL)", "post": "More than a year ago my home was burglarized and i had some firearms stolen from me. In the months following I was arrested for misdemeanor pot possession(wrong place wrong time). Instead of fighting the charges I took Pre Trial Intervention (PTI) which means i plead NOT GUILTY and enter a 12 month probation program which if I complete the charges will be dropped and with a little more lawyering my file sealed. Recently two of the firearms were recovered, one by a local agency and the other at a pawn shop in the next county. For me to get the firearm back from the pawn shop, I have to buy it from them for the money that they spent on it. The detective in charge of the firearm told me it would be okay for a friend or relative to pick it up I just needed to let him know who would be coming for it, but I also didn't inform him that i was currently on PTI. I'm just not sure of the legality of taking back possession while on PTI or even having someone else pick it up for me, and the last thing I want to do is get somebody else in trouble for doing me a favor. \n\nHas anyone else dealt with a similar situation or able to offer me any insight on what to do next? Would a lawyer be able to inform me of the laws without much of a payment? Its already going to cost me a few hundred dollars to get back my own property that was stolen from me and its not really worth it for me to put out much more for something that i dont think i need representation for. Or if anyone has someone who could clarify things for me off of reddit PM me.", "summary": "GUNS GOT STOLEN AND RECOVERED,BUT NOW ON PROBATION. IS IT LEGAL FOR ME OR A FRIEND/RELATIVE TO GET THEM BACK FROM THE PAWN SHOP?"}
{"id": "t3_3btfn7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Breakups] Should I[28m] get back with my ex[28f]", "post": "I hope I'm doing this right because I'm on mobile, I'm try to make it short. Me and my exgf were together for almost 3 years, we lived together for the last year. Back in February we broke up because she wanted to go live with her sister in New York ( I'm in Baltimore) Anyway she tells me over texts the other day she misses me and wants to get back together. I loved the idea until I found out she slept with 2 other guys. I know, we were broke up so she had the right, that's not what's bothering me, it's picturing it without wanting to and trying to find a way to overcome this and live with this that's bothering me. I love this woman with all my heart and couldn't wait to get back together, until that news. What have you guys done to deal with this. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "ex slept with men while we were apart. How do I move on and forgive her before we reunite the relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_xie5i", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[28/m] wondering if traditional no sex/no cohabitation/no foreplay rules [27/f] till marriage actually lead to a stronger marriage?", "post": "My girlfriend 27 has grown up with a very strong set of beliefs that there should be no sex/foreplay/cohabitation till marriage, subsequently she has never had a solid relationship, has never had sex or fallen in love. To put things in perspective, she had recently achieved (her first) orgasm one night I had helped her though her cloths.\n\nSo here we are dating... going out to dinner a few times a week, making out on the couch like teenagers. If I press her too far sexually, she then regresses back and that is not done for a few weeks. Meanwhile I am thinking, that I will never be close enough to marry her if we are not progressing the relationship (foreplay, spending the night, maybe even moving in with each other at some point).\n\n--------------------------------------------\n\nWhen I asked her values she states the following. :\n\n\"I dont want to be test ridden like a car\".\n\n\"If I am going to act like the wife, why not become the wife\".\n\n\"Its harder to just walk away when you are married\".\n\n\"I would feel less of my self if I was living with someone who did not marry me\".\n\n\"Marriage is great for taxes\".\n\n\"I need to be engaged before we do anything more than we are currently doing\".\n\n\"I know you want to buy a house, but I wont move in unless we are married (once we are married I want us to buy a joint house together so were both on the title and the partner could never say \"this is MY house\".\n\n\"We could sign a prenump if you want\".\n\n--------------------------------------------------\n\nLike this is some formula for a relationship, minus the love that would somehow fall into a good relationship.\n\nI dont see any of this shit above.. I want basic love, love that would flourish into a normal sexual life, and progress into a strong relationship, then marriage.\n\nI currently feel none of this and here is she talking about heavy, outdated formal dating. Dont get me wrong I like this girl, but every time she talks about this I drift further apart.", "summary": "Current (relationship novice) girlfriend is making me jump through all the traditional dating to marriage hoops like its some sort of magic formula for a successful marriage, I am not feeling any of this and see it as a receipt for disaster."}
{"id": "t3_4uakep", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] was using GFs [24] phone for gps and another guy was sending cutesy texts, now she wants space.", "post": "Hey guys\n\nSo last weekend my gf and I went camping and we were using her phone to gps out of the woods back to her place. While I was plugging in directions her phone buzzed with a series of cutesy texts from her coworker (pic of his cat saying it misses her, pics of him and what he was doing that weekend). \n\nA little backstory.. I recently moved over 1k miles to take a summer job and it was a bonus because the job was closer to her, we were long distance for over 3 months and one night she frantically called me because she felt like she was emotionally cheating on me with this same guy. She said nothing happened he just tried to make moves on her while they were out with other coworkers, and she told him to keep it professional.\n\nFast forward a month after that and I see these texts, so I get a little upset and we talk about the relationship. She tells me she she's never done anything with him although she enjoys his company, and doesn't really respond to the texts. While we're talking she mentions that she's clueless about serious relationships (I'm the second longest at 7 months), is confused etc etc, and comes to the conclusion that she loves me but wants some space.\n\nNow this was yesterday and today she's texted me that she still wants to try, but I can't help but think it'll feel like a forced relationship, or that she'll continue to not take the relationship seriously and I'll get hurt.", "summary": "Relationship on the rocks because gf still talks to someone she \"emotionally cheated\" on me with, what do?"}
{"id": "t3_2ziesz", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I passed the pre-employment polygraph, but I'm still worrying.", "post": "Sorry for the wall of text!  This is, of course, a disposable account due to the sensitive nature of my dilemma.\n\nI'm in the process of applying for a non-sworn position at the sheriff's department in my area.  I have gotten most of the way through the process, including having had my polygraph a couple of days ago.  I passed, which makes sense because I was truthful.\n\nHere's the rub:  I revealed some information during that session, and I don't know if it will disqualify me from getting the job.  \nI consider myself a generally good person- I'm no saint, but overall I don't think I've done anything too awful.  (BTW, I'm female, in my mid-30's.)\n\nHere's the item I'm worried about:   15 or so years ago, in the Napster/Limewire days, I downloaded a file.  I don't remember what I was looking for- anyway, this file was named something innocuous and I had no idea what I was getting into.\nTurned out it was child porn.  As soon as I realized what it was, I turned it off and deleted the file.  So, it wasn't deliberate, but it doesn't change the fact that I have seen (\"viewed\") child porn.\n\nI was honest about this in the polygraph, and I think my results reflected that I don't purposely watch anything like that.  I've also been much more careful on the Interwebs ever since.\n\nThe examiner told me that everything that we went over, will be included in her report to the department.  I really hope that this, or anything else I revealed (minor theft, experimented with pot years ago) doesn't disqualify me; I'm having a hard time not worrying about it.  The background check is next; I should pass that with no problem.\n\nDoes anyone have any words of advice?  I need to stop thinking about this!   Thanks in advance.", "summary": "Admitted having accidentally seen child porn, in polygraph session.  Now I'm worried about not getting the job."}
{"id": "t3_1lchbh", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Need help with landlord and lease", "post": "I have a question about a lease my roommates and I signed. We are living in a house off campus that is usually rented to college students. \n\nOur lease says in one section, \" Landlord agrees to furnish the following appliances, if any: 2 Stove, 2 Refrigerator, 1 Dishwasher, 1 washer/dryer, and A/C\"\n\nHowever, our house only has one stove and one fridge. I emailed the landlord company and asked them to provide the other kitchen with appliances since the lease says she should provide them for us. Her response is as follows: \n\n\"Hi X,\nThere will not approve of any change in the lease terms and the rental amount.  I understand your lease states 2 refrigerators and 2 stoves.  But, the refrigerator and stove in the smaller kitchen was not purchased by _____ Properties, it was left by the previous tenants years ago.  Each year the new set of tenants agreed to keep the appliances but recently the appliances have been working, so that is why they were removed from the property... After the work is completed in the kitchen, I will see if we have any appliances (maybe a refrigerator) available at that time.  \nThank you,\nY\"\n\nI'm thinking, the landlord wrote the lease and we signed it without making any changes. Is this not materially complying with the terms of the contract? Since she wrote it, shouldn't it be construed against her (if it that clause is even ambiguous)? Is it a material eviction to not have the second kitchen working? There are six girls living in my house so we would really like to either have the fridge provided or the rent reduced by the amount of the replacement.", "summary": "Our lease says the landlord needs to provide us with two fridges and stoves but we only have one of each. Landlord won't give us the other two."}
{"id": "t3_2e0myi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] with my boyfriend [32 M] together 5 years: he's a dreamer who can't seem to get his act together, otherwise a good relationship but is it time to break it off?", "post": "I've been with my partner for 5 years and we communicate really well and enjoy each other's company, but in this last year I've been wondering if this is actually workable for the long term.\n\nWhile I'm not interested in marriage and kids, I am interested in building a life together and it seems challenging to do with him. Last year he quit his job because it was unfulfilling and I was supportive of him taking the time to find out what he wants to do. The year has gone by and it's hard not to notice that he hasn't made much progress. His biggest breakthrough has been that he wants to create art and doesn't care which means it takes to support himself. Even settling on a career in art wouldnt bother me, but he just wants to create art and is not interested in making a career out of it. Doesn't want any kind of career it seems, but I find myself embittered by how selfish that feels, because I work so many hours.\n\nLong story short he just refuses to think about any practical parts of life, how to sustain a life financially (maybe because he is willing to get help from his parents when he needs it?). In the meantime, I want to be able to plan trips, live together, invest in a dog, etc. Every element that requires planning seems impossible. I get frustrated by the thought of everything falling on my shoulders, but I also appreciate the emotional support and distraction he provides me from my career-driven life. We've talked about these differences a lot but just keep hitting a dead end. We care about each other but also are not sure if we're too different.", "summary": "Are we just too different: Me a career-minded planner and him a free spirit? How do I decided whether it's time to break up after 5 years?"}
{"id": "t3_14ouhu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, when did you realize that the world doesn't revolve around you?", "post": "This problem seems more and more trivial every time I think about it. Now that finals are coming around, I keep thinking back to my freshman year in college. I had just bombed an exam and it was consuming my mind. It was all that I could think about, failing the class, ruining my GPA, hurting my odds of getting into a professional school. Shortly after my exam, I went to volunteer at a hospital nearby for the afternoon. It was a slow day, but eventually I got called to the maternity ward to discharge a patient. Most of the patients at this hospital, like the one I was wheeling out, were Hispanic and didn't speak very good English, but occasionally I would get a little small talk. On the way into the elevator she asked me how my day was, and with my thoughts on my exam, I said, \"alright.\" \"Just alright?\" she asked. I explained to her how I was really worried about an exam I just took. She smiled and nodded understandingly. She asked me what college I went to and after I answered she said, \"Oh, I applied there last year, but I got pregnant so I had to withdraw.\" I was thrown for a loop, she was about the same age as me. After she left with her parents, she tried to give me a tip. We weren't supposed to accept tips, but she insisted I take it, so via protocol, I took it and gave it to the office, and they added it to the student scholarship fund. When I returned the wheelchair to the nurse's station, I overheard them talking about the patient I just discharged. I commented on how nice she was. They filled me in on the rest of her story. She had just spent a month in the neonatal infant care unit because her baby was born premature, her healthcare wouldn't be able to cover most of the costs, the father of the baby had skipped out, and she was turning 19 next week. I was stunned. With so much on her plate, she had the courtesy to ask me about my day and without money to spare, she had insisted on giving me a tip.", "summary": "I was a bitch about failing an exam. Met another girl, same age as me, just had a premature baby, had no SO, would be paying off hospital bills for years to come, but was still extremely nice."}
{"id": "t3_1y1t24", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 F] found out my boyfriend[18 M] of 11 months is jacking off to pictures of my friends", "post": "My boyfriend of 11 months has told me before that he has masturbation and porn addictions and that he's working on them, I try to not bug him too much about this.\n\nI went through his phone today (I know, terrible and crazy of me, I invaded his privacy) and I read an email between him and his friend. My SO was saying he jacks off to slutty pictures of my friends on instagram. I am hurt, but I know that most men do fantasize about girls they know. I don't know if I should confront him about this, should I be angry or am I in the wrong for snooping? Is it normal to jack off to pictures of girls that are friends? Keep in mind he has a masturbation addiction, so this is probably a frequent thing.", "summary": "Boyfriend has porn/masturbation addictions. Snooped and found out he jacks off to my friends pictures. Is this normal? Should I be mad? Or am I in the wrong for snooping?"}
{"id": "t3_2ei2wr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20F] My [22M] SO never wants to spend time with me.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together off & on for three years. We've had our fair share of issues, but I love him and I think he loves me. \n\nWe work opposite shifts, and it really cuts into our time together. Majorly. On the few days we both have off, every other weekend, he chooses to hang out with his friends. He works with his friends on the same schedule, an they are over every single day.\n\n I always feel like I have to force him to do anything with me and I'm getting tired of it. I always complain to him that it would be nice if we could spend time together. But, he just says in over reacting. And that I can hang out with him and his friends. The thing is, we haven't spent a day together just him and I in over a year. I like his friends but I just want a day where we can be together just us. I'm sick of being ignored for his friends, or video games and I don't know what to do.", "summary": "my boyfriend and I work opposite shifts and never see Eachother, on the few days off we both have together, he chooses to spend it with his friends over me."}
{"id": "t3_4dhxxs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "27f when will I learn that on and of relationships (4yrs) would never work out with 25m?", "post": "After 4 years I've been in this madness of up and down for 4 years and each time we would try dating again. Each time he would crush my heart and tell me he have commitment problems. Every time my ex breaks it off with me, I feel my world crashing over and this repeats itself where I can't get myself out of bed and call in sick from work. \n\nEach time we get back together, I truly believe that it will work out this next time. I would trust that he wanted a serious commitment. It would start out great, full of energy, love and affection. Then after this huge fight and a break, he said we should take a longer break to grow. He is afraid of missing out on life because he is young. That is his mentality. I would lash out by saying he just wants to hook up with multiple women. But we are both not the type for one night stands. \n\nI would fantasize about planning trips together, maybe even moving in with each other, etc. and he would rather say things where he doesn't mind living in another country for a year. That's the type of things he would say that would send me into so much hurt and anger. \n\nThroughout the relationship, I'd feel extremely insecure and anxiety because he was never sure in the end about us. This cause me to be crazy and lash out over little things and controlling. And sooner or later we break up once again. He doesn't understand the pain I go through each time I heal and start over again. This time the pain is ripped from a million bandages over the course of 4 years.", "summary": "ex always breaks up when it gets too serious and I get insecure, when will I learn not to go back to this on and off madness and hurt myself all over again?"}
{"id": "t3_3c6vty", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to tell my (18F) SO of two years I(18M) used an escort (and regret it) but it has now made me never want to leave her?", "post": "Some background: I've been having an existential crisis lately where I don't see any point of living other than to reproduce and die. (I don't want to put the burden of life onto someone else either!) I discussed it with my friends and came down to \"enjoy your time here while you can\", so I decided I'd focus on the things I love, which are videogames and sex.\n\n With my GF and I going to seperate colleges in a month, I figured that this would be the end and I would be able to finally get my sex life going and have some fun. (We will be 12hrs apart by car)\n\n So now that I'm overseas I thought I'd visit an erotic massage place and enjoy myself. I recieved unprotected fellatio for 20seconds before I suggested that she wrap it up. We then had protected intercourse. \n\n It was not very enjoyable. It made me realize sex is not just about pleasing yourself or your partner but its about the special connection you share. I really regret not rubbing one out before I left that day.\n\n When I got home that night I realized I had betrayed my SO's trust and I cried thinking about it. How it would hurt her knowing I did this. I realized how special she is to me. (I'm tearing up as I write this.)\n\n I sent her a message that night telling her how much she meant to me and I would stay in a long distance relationship so that we could move in together and that I will stay loyal to her for four years. I meant it and I mean it forever, this experienced changed me for the better. I'm out of my existential crisis now, I realized that my purpose is in life is to build a great one with her, together.\n\n How can I break it to her? I'm a very honest person so I can't go on seeing her each day knowing I took advantage of her trust. I return to my country soon.\n\n(And I'm going to get an STD test even though i show no symptoms, just in case)", "summary": "sex with an escort made me realize I want to spend the rest of my life with my GF who sincerely cares for me and I need to tell her this"}
{"id": "t3_1th3ou", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend (23M) of one and a half years cheated on me (20F). So confused, need advice.", "post": "My boyfriend (23M) and I (20F) have been together for one year and seven months. We both have been cheated on in our past and vowed to never do that to one another.\n\nIn the beginning I could tell he was insecure and had trust issues from past relationships. I kept building him up and reassuring him. \n\nAbout seven months into our relationship he texted me under a new number pretending to be somebody else and I had responded to the flirtatious text. I had to regain trust in him and he was able to move forward. I have never cheated on him. \n\nFast forward to yesterday, I have had a feeling things weren't right. We haven't been seeing eachother as much even though we talk everyday and profess our deep love for eachother daily. I saw his phone had texts from two different women that were very flirtatious and that he's seen them multiple times. \n\nI confronted him and he begged and pleaded for me back and to forgive him like he forgave me. He claims that I have been distant (even though I make time for him) and that hes scared of me moving an hour away for school. He also says he did not have sex with them although one text from one woman asked if she could still come over to his apartment later. \n\nI made him leave a voicemail to one who he claims was his ex that cheated on him. He told her to never text him or call him back as he messed up a valuable relationship. He says I'm the woman he wants to marry, the love of his life, and that they don't mean anything. How do I trust him? What do I do? I dont know what to believe.", "summary": "My boyfriend of a year and seven months cheated on me with two different women because he says im distant and hes scared of losing me. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2r9k7j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Mom (56f) thinks my (29m) girlfriend (23f) is too sexual. Is she on to something or is it an over reaction?", "post": "So I've been dating my girlfriend for about 2 months and I thought things were serious enough for me to invite her to my family's home for the Xmas holiday break. I didn't ask if I could share a bedroom with her, because it was OK with my previous girlfriend.  We moved our stuff into the same bedroom and spent the week there without incident.\nAfter she left, I had a couple days with my parents and my mom revealed she was worried about my girlfriend \"oozing sex\" and being way too touchy feely and that she wasn't emotionally mature. My mom and dad were  upset that we just shared a bedroom without asking. (I have my own apartment and they know that we spend most of our weekends together.)   Now my mom can be overly analytical of this stuff because she's in the counseling profession.\nMy girlfriend is pretty touchy feely but I like it and aren't all relationships mostly physical at the beginning?  I think she's really smart and sexy and fun to be around.  She is a bit younger than me so should I be worried about what my mom thinks? Might she have some validity for her concerns?", "summary": "my mom thinks my girlfriend is too physical and not emotionally mature. Should I listen to my mom and slow down a little with my girlfriend?"}
{"id": "t3_2p7nkd", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by ruining Ian McKellens dinner.", "post": "Okay this wasn't today but in 2005.\n\nMy dad worked for a few production companies in London and often got to meet celebrities through work and as social friends. He managed to get tickets to go see a Pantomime in London which Ian McKellen was starring in as Widow Twankey. The show was a rendition of Aladdin.\n\nAfter the show we got to go backstage to see the cast, and as a 10 year old I was super exited because I was going to see fucking Gandalf in person! Holy shit I was pumped! \n\nWe get into the backstage area of the venue and inside a big dressing room where all the cast were getting out of their make up and costumes etc and sat down in the corner laughing away with Roger Allen was indeed Sir Ian McKellan, who was eating a[ Pot Noodle] on a saucer in a dressing gown and high heels (part of his show outfit)\n\nMy face lit up when I saw him, my dad walked me over to say hi and to sign the booklet about the show with his signature.\n\nAs my dad said who I was he stood up and said 'Ahhh!! Splendid to meet you young Mr_Murdoc!' But as he lent over to shake my hand I accidentally reached out for his and knock his Pot Noodle all over him and his dressing gown. He jumped with an 'oh my!' and began to wipe off all the noddles and sauce I just got all over him. All the other cast members were laughing like crazy.\n\nHe laughed it off as well and said it was alright and to give me the book so he could sign it. We ended up talking about some of the films he did and how I loved LOTR's and X-Men etc... Left with all their autographs which I still have (see below).\n\nIan, if you ever somehow read this, you were amazing. A true gentleman and a friendly person, sorry about the gown. \n\n**Proof", "summary": "Went to see show starring Ian McKellan, went backstage to see hima nd spilt food on him."}
{"id": "t3_2bd7ou", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Always seize the opportunity to help others", "post": "This is my first post so here's a little intro about what I do for work. I'm a security guard. I work the graveyard shift in the downtown part of my city. Nothing special. Being a security guard is easy money. \n\nAnyways, while making my first round I noticed a larger man in a wheelchair across the street trying to make it onto the curb. The transition for the handicapped access wasn't smooth enough and he was stuck. I crossed and pushed him onto the sidewalk. \n\nHe needed to go to the hospital five blocks the road. I called my supervisor and said I'd be back in a few I had to help this guy. I pushed him to the hospital and walked back. \n\nIf I had my headphones in like any other day, I wouldn't have seen him and he'd be struggling to get there. \n\nI'm not sure what was wrong but he had one arm and one leg missing.", "summary": "I pushed a large man with one leg and one usable arm five blocks to the hospital because he was alone and stuck on curb at 12am."}
{"id": "t3_10w6te", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Update (10/03/12) from [30/m] Wife left with daughter, needs space to think...", "post": "Originally posting here -- \n\nSo here is an", "summary": "Progress is being made, not as fast as I would like but at least it's being done. Not sure what else to do at this point."}
{"id": "t3_4rklt3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend (29/m) and I (28/f) have been together for a little over 2 yrs, but he has broken up with me several times. Can this be fixed?", "post": "It hurts very much every time he breaks up with me. This situation is taking a toll on me and I'd like to hear your thoughts about what's best to do.\n\nGenerally, this is what happens: we have an argument and it ends with him breaking up with me. He either goes completely silent or leaves the house for a few days while I am crying/begging him to stay. I know I shouldn't. Twice, I really thought it was over, had stopped all contact with him and he reached out to me.\n\nLast week, right before a camping trip, he threatened to break up with me before the end of the Summer and acted like nothing happened the next morning, being super nice to me. I feel frustrated, because it's like I have to tiptoe around him, he gets angry very quickly, sometimes calls me names in the heat of the moment. He acts nice with me infront of his friends, but otherwise we rarely have one on one dates. I don't mind that he needs alone time since I need a lot of that myself, but it is annoying that he doesn't want to help out with house chores. Furthermore, we aren't sleeping in the same bed nor does he seem enthused to get intimate. For the last part, it might just be my impression since I don't know how I feel about that myself with everything that has happened. \n\nI don't know what to think: are relationships this messy and am I just making too big of a deal out of this?\n\nFinally, I feel very vulnerable since my job contract ended unexpectedly about a month ago and maybe that puts more of a restrain on the relationship. I am looking forward to hearing your thoughts about whether this relationship can be fixed or not. Feel free to ask questions if I left out some important details. Thank you for reading me.", "summary": "Boyfriend and I are together at the moment, but I feel very insecure and confused about everything. I am afraid it's a matter of days, weeks before the next time he threatens to break up."}
{"id": "t3_4kfpkj", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Injury: When to visit a doctor?", "post": "Well, I thought I was being careful, but here I am, confessing at the altar of Runnit, a runner's greatest sin: impatience.\n\nA week ago Sunday I went out for a 4 mile run as I am currently in the middle of a 10k training program. I started the run with what felt like a tight left glute, but I wasn't concerned. By mile 3 I was feeling some pain in my left hip (nothing super concerning), but finished my 4 miles because it had taken a lot of mental fortitude and willpower to get out there that day and I wanted to finish.\n\nI hobbled home and did some massage and stretching. Decided to rest up and heal. I skipped my scheduled Tuesday 3.5 mile, then the Thursday 2 mile, and now here I am going to skip my scheduled 4 mile run again because the pain hasn't really gone away. It's a dull, achey, pinching pain, maybe a 3 to 4 on the pain scale? Feels deep, but not in the actual joint itself.\n\nI've never experienced a sports injury like this before, and so I'm here wondering when and if you would see a doctor about this. I'm kind of crabby, because my race is at the end of June and I really want to at least perform moderately well on my first 10k.", "summary": "Dull achey pain in left hip, a week of rest hasn't resolved the problem...time to see a doctor? Yes/no/how to proceed?"}
{"id": "t3_v8rte", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Gf fucked a random guy; should we have a (ffm) threesome?", "post": "Me (22m)\n\nGf (21f)\n\nDating for 4 years. (Both virgins before hooking up)\n\nGf just admitted to me that she had sex with a random guy while drunk after a party. She is *very* ashamed/ regretful and is afraid that I will dump her (she admits that if I had have done that to her she would have dumped me).\n\nI'm happy that she was the one who told me, and feel weird just how much it doesn't hurt me (it helps that I know she is really sorry). I still trust her.\n\nWe have toyed with the idea of having a ffm threesome before (she is a bit bi-curious) but I decided against it since I knew how insanely jealous she would be afterwards.\n\nNow she will do anything to make it up to me and suggested the threesome. I'm not sure if she is just saying that to relieve her guilt, and don't want her to do something she doesn't want to. And most of all I don't want to lose her.\n\nSo guys and gals, are threesomes all they are cracked up to be? Does having a threesome adversely affect relationships?", "summary": "My gf had sex with a random guy after a party and wants to make it up to me by having a ffm threesome. Does this type of situation ever end well?"}
{"id": "t3_10w8ke", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[24/f] my boyfriend [25/m] is too clingy!", "post": "Hi all!\nSo I have been dating my boyfriend for about 4 years now. He is totally wonderful except he is so clingy. \n\nWhen ever we are alone he is always cuddling me too close and holding me and it feels suffocating. When we are in public he is always trying to hug me from behind and constantly kissing me. He will always try to kiss me on the neck in public and it is driving me nuts! I hate pda. hate it. Its driving me crazy. I have tried to get him to stop but if I mention anything he'll pout and walk behind me. If I get irritated when we're alone he'll ask me if he is a clingy boyfriend and i'll say yes, he will giggle and tell me he's ok with that. I don't want to hurt his feelings but I think I'll explode at him one day.\n\nWhy is he doing this? and how can I make him stop?", "summary": "boyfriend loves excessive pda. I want him to cut it out and not pout when I ask him to stop."}
{"id": "t3_4xsjkw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my friend [19 F] known her for a couple years. I like her", "post": "So I've known this girl for a couple years (about 4) and day by day i realize she's everything I want in a girl. But I don't know what to do about it because I've never had a girlfriend before and never really been intimate with someone. \n\nWe went to elementary together but didn't really talk much. Afterwards she moved and to another country and came back when we started 9th grade. \n\nwe went to the same school through 9th - 12th grade. I liked her back then too but didn't realize it until now how much she means to me. \n\nWhen we still were in school we didn't really talk over the phone much because we hung out at school and some times in the weekend. The problem is that none of us texts a whole lot so communication is kinda weak now and I don't know how to tell her that i like her without risking our \"friendship\". Although it should be noted that she's a very kind and understanding person so I don't know what her reaction will be.\n\nShe's the kindest person in the world, she's funny and caring and is the only person who manages to make me genuinely happy without having to fake it.\n\nSorry if this sounded like a rant but I have so much going through my head while now knowing if she even cares about me.\n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Shy guy [19M] have feelings for friend [19F] of 4 years, never had a gf so don't know how to go about it."}
{"id": "t3_3tjfn2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17M], Picking between long-time friend [17M], her [15F] sister, or her sister's [15F] friend", "post": "I'm in Grade 12 at high school, staying for another year next year.  I don't get around and have had practically no relationships.\n\nI have known a girl [17F, GR12] for 4 years.  Let's call her Jess.  We've always gotten along very well but have never been romantically involved.  She is really fun to be around.  I didn't really notice she was attractive until this year, (eh, big school).  I sit with her and a few others at lunch.\n\nI'm in a class for a musical at my school. There are 79 students in the class, including crew and cast.  I am playing the male lead.\n\nJess' sister [15F, GR10] is in the class.  Let's call her Jill.  She is a nun in the musical. Not a major role, but she does have some solos.  I only met her in passing last year.  This year, I have gotten to know her better.  Whenever we talk, she seems to laugh at all my crappy jokes and might(?) be flirting with me.  She started conversations with me on FB.  She is really attractive.\n\nJill's friend [15F, GR10] is also a nun.  Let's call her Amanda.  I had never spoken a word to her until this year.  I like everything about her.  I try not to stare.  She has a beautiful singing voice, and may have been a female lead if she wasn't busy being a dancer (outside of school) as well.  We talk every day during class, and always seem to have fun around each other.\n\nI want a serious relationship, I don't know who to pick.  Also, I can't pick one, get rejected, and go for a different girl.  Amanda would tell Jill if I asked her out first; Jess would tell Jill if I asked her out first; Jill would tell either if I asked her out first.  \n\nOnce (if) I decide I will post any updates.", "summary": "I am trying to decide between my [17F] friend, her [15F] sister, and her's sister's friend [15F]."}
{"id": "t3_1w80fs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Update: Me [26f] wants to get back together with my ex [41m]", "post": "Update: So the ex sent me a text last night saying that he didn't understand why I had an okcupid profile when I wanted to try and get back together with him, he said that it seemed like I was more \"lonely and sad\" and not a person sho was still in love with him. I created my profile about 2 weeks ago and haven't been on any dates, because he wasn't communicating with me; meanwhile he reactivated the account I met him through right after the break up, and has been on dates.\n\nI tried to explain to him, that I haven't been using the account at all, and haven't  been on any dates, and I brought up the fact that he never deleted the account he had originally (we had talked about eventually getting hitched, so to me it seems like he kept the profile because he never planned on getting hitched). \n\nHe is also convinced that I have narcissistic  personality disorder, which is devastating for me to hear. I have gone to my shrink about this, and my shrink said   no that I don't have this, and that it sounds like my ex is projecting. I told this all to my ex, in an attempt to open communication and to get him to drop this \"diagnosis\", and I even got a second opinion from a counselor that specializes in personality disorders,who also said that I don't have npd, though I do display signs of defaulting into co-dependent behaviours. Even though 2 medical professionals have said I don't have npd, my ex continues to say \"that's classic npd\" when I say something contrary to what he wants.\n\nHe is also, negating anything I say as lying, or thinking only of me, or of changing  the subject.  I know I'm not perfect, and I know I caused him a lot of pain, it's just so hard to try and apologize and fix things between us so that we can move on and rebuild, when he takes anything I say and twists it into the opposite of what I intended it to mean, and that when I try to explain in different ways he says I'm lying or back tracking\n\nSorry for bad link posting, my laptop died, and I'm using a crappy tablet:", "summary": "Ex tested me last night, called me a jerk for having okcupid profile, even though he's been on dates.  Also throws npd armchair diagnosis around."}
{"id": "t3_jwvoi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Whats the worst that can happen?", "post": "So tonight I walk back to my apartment defeated and utterly lack the will to live right now.\nI'm an Intelligence Analyst for the Army National Guard. I hold a Top Secret Clearance. and Im 20.\nI'm already on diversion because when I was sober, I drove a drunk friend home, who happened to have weed on him when I was driving him home, to then be pulled over by the police.\nI'm on a 90 day diversion, 1 UA a month, everyday I call to see if my 'Color' is called to go take a breathalyser test. Tonight, I decided to have 2 shots with a friend (it takes alot to get me even buzzed) who is getting married in a week and I can't make it. Luckily enough, my other friend who was taking us to a place to meet other friends, got pulled over with an open container and breathalysed, and thrown in jail.\nI (being the good natured, newly renewed Christian I am(couple months,trying to turn a new leaf)) told the officer what happened the whole night. \nexplaining that I'd be totally F**ked if anything else happened to my record while on diversion. TS clearance- gone, ADOS job to pay bills - gone, and 1 of 2 other things would happen... A:I'd lose my clearance and HOPEFULLY be allowed to reclass to a different job, and owing the $20k, or B:Be kicked out of the military for not having the job they gave me, and still owe them $20k for the enlistment bonus.\nEither way I look at it.. I'm fucked because doing the good thing and telling the cop I had something to drink and cooperating with him about the night.\nSo my question is.. Why shouldn't I leave the country and just travel the world and leave all my family and life behind to travel and read the bible......\n\nAnd in the meantime.....AMA....I'll try my best.''", "summary": "Got MIP'd, end of career in the Intelligence Community of the USA, possibly get kicked of the military under dishonorable discharge."}
{"id": "t3_3bm9aw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20/M] with my girlfriend [20/F] 6 months, met girlfriend on night out she's with her (guy/girl) friends, she tells me to go back t0 my friends, blames me for not wanting to see her", "post": "Ok so I go with my friends on a night out, girlfriend goes with hers (both are friendship groups have girls/boys in), I bump into her by accident early on in the night, we have small talk for a few minutes, both of us are laughing (having fun), then she tells me to go back to my friends. I haven't offended any of her friends or anything, there's nothing me or my friends have done wrong - just to get that straight.\n'You should go back to your friends', I keep the conversation going, wanting to stay with her a bit longer, replying 'yeah in 5 minutes (etc. etc.)'. Eventually I just go back, respecting what she told me to do and not wanting to question her in front of friends (I always avoid getting friends involved in disagreements with relationships - we both do).\n\nOn top of this she has introduced me to her friends like once - I always respect peoples privacy and keeping friendships separate, but when my girlfriend doesn't want me top hang around with her and her friends, feel devalued by her.\n\nAt the end of the night, I question why, apparently it's my fault as she didn't think I wanted to see her. I make it clear that she was the one who told me to go back to my friends.\n\nWe've also had an issue with meeting each others friends too, she has met all of mine, knows them well etc. But I have barely met hers. I told her a couple of weeks ago, that I wanted to meet her friends. She told me that she would let me meet them etc. etc. It's not like it would be hard for me to meet them - she hangs out with them all the time.\n\nOpinions on why she is doing this? Where do I go from here?", "summary": "Meet girlfriend on night out with her friends, she tells me to go back to my friends, then blames me for not wanting to see her - I haven't met her friends more than once."}
{"id": "t3_2doyrp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19f] girlfriend is breaking up w me because I [20m] searched my ex [20f] on facebook", "post": "Weve been together for almost two years our anniversary is January 4th. Now, me and my ex go to the same college, my girlfriend has trust issues because I used to be a liar and a Jerk, I changed my whole life over the past years and stopped blaming the world for things n treating people like shit, I changed a lot for her and mostly for myself but she has it stuck in her head I'm not over my ex, which was a problem in our relationship. but I'm passed that and over my ex.\n\nShe thinks I'm in denial and love my ex but ik I love my girlfriend. Now about the Facebook my ex chills with a lot of kids in my fraternity so I saw some photos and I went to check them out n see what people were up to. She thinks this is the worst thing n on top doesn't believe me n thinks I was just checking on her because you know, \"I love her\"  and all. She blocked my number and i can facebook message her but id rather see her in person, she leaves to go back to school sunday and i leave to go back wednesday, i feel like a holes been punched through me, i love her so much.", "summary": "My girlfriend has trust issues so she broke up with me when i was just looking at some photos that were on my exes profile of mutual friends that we have, was not interested in her at all."}
{"id": "t3_1mfpyx", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Tired of being used.", "post": "Why do  keep putting myself out there and trying to help people and actually care? For the most part people are just using me to get something. \nEveryone just looks out for themselves. I'm tired of it. People are greedy and will pretend to care just to get what they want. \nIt's been this way my whole life it seems. This is why I shut down and close myself off from people. \n\nI'm not so jaded as to cut myself off from everyone forever, but I'm going to be more careful. And I AM going to take a few days for myself. I'm going to be \"selfish\" for a 2 or 3 days and not bother with anyone. Cut off communication for the most par. Just kind of whatever. \n\nI keep falling into the same trap. Though this time it wasn't as harsh as previous times and didn't last as long. It only being \"online people\" that I haven't known long makes it better in some ways but makes me feel a bit more dumb for putting myself out there like I did. \n\nPeople just don't give a shit. Greed rules over all.  \nI'll stick to the friends I have and go back to lurking in the shadows for the most part.", "summary": "People are greedy, I'm giving myself permission to take a few \"selfish\" days, and no more new \"friends\"."}
{"id": "t3_4ypl9w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend [30M] and I [25F] have feelings for each other but he has someone else. How can I deal with this and not feel envious?", "post": "Well, he and I have told each other we have feelings for each other but he's sleeping with someone else and still is. I don't want this type of relationship. But I see him very frequently and I see him with her frequently as well. Every time I see them together I feel really sad. I go along fine and happy because I don't see that very often but when I do it's ouch! \n\nI have distractions and hobbies and such, and no I can't go no contact as I have many parallel things that I have to do with him. \n\nI've had as little contact as I could with him, not talking much and only about things we have to communicate with. He has no social media which is good. \n\nI'm not so much jealous but more envious of the closeness and how he shares his life and stories with her. We used to be like that and this happened, and I've tried to still be friends but my feelings got in the way. It doesn't seem to be bothering him outwardly, which kind of hurts. Because of that I went to as little contact as possible. He did ask me if I hated him and wondered if we were still friends. \n\nI would like to balance between being the friends we used to be and not being envious over his relationship. I don't know if this going to as little contact as possible is something that is a mature thing to do, and if I've hurt him if he has to wonder if I hated him. I really would like to resume our old friendship, I loved it, but hate the envy and sadness I get now. Any advice would be great. Thanks!", "summary": "Is there really any realistic way to still be good friends with someone you have mutual feelings for and not feel ridiculously upset and sad when you see them with their partner?"}
{"id": "t3_121cgq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need advice on cheating.", "post": "Alright some back information, I'm 18 female I've been in a few really great relationships with some really great girls! I'm currently in one (it's been 2 months) and I have to say I couldn't be happier. My girlfriend is the greatest thing I could ever ask for and more than I'd ever expect from a person. I'm not unhappy at all, not bored at all (of the sex either.. that's just.. amazing), I have no issues really with the relationship and how it is!\n\nThat being said.. why do I think about cheating? I know I have a really *really* high sex drive, but hers is rather high as well. It works out great, and I can't complain at all about what/how she does. \n\nI just have always, in every relationship, felt an urge to cheat. Not to end my relationship, but because *I know* that it's bad. That's why I want to do it? I'm just looking for opinions here, maybe someone else faces the same thoughts? I have dreams that I can control and I'll dream of my girlfriend all the time but some nights I'll cheat in my dreams. There's just this feeling that hits me where it's like.. \"yeah.. I'd do that. It's bad.. but I want to.\"\nAs a side note maybe, it's always been part of my \"fantasies\" to do bad things. (sex with a teacher..coach..married woman..someone else cheating with me) Maybe I'm just attracted to the bad things? \n\nI never would though! I love my girlfriend and I'd never want to hurt her. I'm just curious as to what it means/any advice or thoughts on it. Any questions as well I can answer! Thanks for reading this jumbled train of thoughts!", "summary": "In a perfect relationship, no complaints about sex/love/feelings/I'm very happy! But still want to cheat, maybe because I know it's bad? Just looking for opinions/advice! Thanks"}
{"id": "t3_122ha6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit, I have the opportunity to retaliate against someone who has wronged me. What should I do?", "post": "Earlier this week, something of extremely high value went missing from one of our work facilities. I used an e-mail to make a public announcement that it was missing and I was looking for it. Today, I discovered hard and undeniable evidence of who had last seen/touched my property.\n\nWhen I asked the culprit in a casual and non-confrontational manner, he denied ever seeing it and said that he \"feels my pain\". Then I informed them of the evidence against them, and he admitting to having taken it.This made him visibly nervous. I told him I don't care why he did it, and I just wanted my property back. At this time I am the only person that knows he is the culprit, and I told him that I would keep it that way as long as he immediately did what I ask. \n\nBut now I am having second thoughts. This guy knew exactly what he was doing to me when he took my stuff, because I straightforward told him the repercussions of my loss. For lack of better words, he completely fucked me. Then he had the audacity to look directly into my face and say that he didn't have it, but he felt bad for me. Obviously he didn't feel the need to worry about my problems, and I don't see why I should care about his problems. \n\nThis is someone I see every day. We have the same professional network, peers, and superiors. Basically, all I would have to do is let any of our colleagues know the identity of our department's thief. I am a well-liked and respected member of this \"community\", and somebody that tried to screw me would instantly be outcast. I think that this is fair punishment for the amount of stress and anguish that was caused to me, but that's just my opinion.", "summary": "Someone tried to screw me, I caught them red-handed, and now I can screw them. What would you do?"}
{"id": "t3_270s7x", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My(22F) mentally unstable friend(24F) wants to have a baby ASAP. Should I talk to her? (x-post relationships)", "post": "My friend Danielle was engaged for 4 years in what I can only describe as an extremely toxic relationship (gaslighting and cheating galore in both directions). She finally broke up with him a little under a year ago, and quickly began dating someone new. I have only met the new guy (Mark) a couple of times, but they seem like a far better fit and like they are happy together.\n\nRecently Danielle told me that she wants to get pregnant in the next few months. I didn't say anything about this at the time, but there are a few reasons why I think this would be a bad idea.\n\nFirstly (and least significantly), her and Mark have only been together for about 5 months, and she started dating him really soon after she broke up with her fiance.\n\nSecondly, she isn't mentally stable. I'm not entirely sure what she has been diagnosed with, but it is something like borderline personality disorder or extreme depression. This manifests itself in the form of panic attacks, neurosis, depression and narcissism. She claims that she cannot afford medication, even though we live in a country where prescriptions are incredibly cheap, and you can get free repeat prescriptions. Her not being medicated has led to her being fired or quitting her last few jobs.\nI don't think she realises just how expensive and mentally draining having a child can be. I think it's important that she focuses on getting well before considering having children. I don't think it would be fair to bring up a child in the environment that she can currently offer it.\n\nShould I talk to her about my concerns, or would I be massively out of line for doing so? I'm not sure that she would react well or take what I say on board. I know another of my friends agrees with me, and would probably have another point or two to add, so I could potentially have back up if I were to talk to her. I love this girl and want what's best for her. We have been good friends for about 10 years now.", "summary": "I am struggling with whether I should mind my own business, or mention my concerns to one of my closest friends about her becoming pregnant."}
{"id": "t3_3w9ol8", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "My dress finding story.", "post": "So I did a thing today. (I post the pictures earlier today)\n\nAbout a month ago I was coming home from Therapy and feeling crappy and me and my mum went to a wedding dress shop (the one that used to be renaissance) . We just tried on some dresses. As you can guess they were big and poofy and they were all nice but they were all missing something. \n\nSo my mum got me to try on one and I'm like it fits my criteria (princess sparkerly and strapless) but it had some detail that I didn't like. Anyway I tried it on and fell in love. It was beautiful. It was a stock dress so I could have it for \u00a3800 (which is my budget) ultimately we said no. \n\nSo I've been thinking about it a lot and my mum said we could go back and look. I said it'll never be there, cause it was a stock dress and I couldn't afford it otherwise. \n\nWe went in and the women recognised us. She was with another client. We said we were back to see if she still had the dress. She said she did! And the other girl had put it in her top three!!! In the end the other girl decided against that dress and left without buying one. \n\nI tried it on again and it was still perfect (I've actually lost boob weight since I last had it on. But the woman assured us it's able to be altered and it's the size that she would give me) \n\nI lamented that I hadn't gone shopping with Out my bridesmaids. And she said that I could bring them all in so they could see me in it. Which I totally want to do cause.....\n\nI brought the dress!!!! I have a wedding dress and this feels more real than putting the deposit down on the venue. \n\nSitting here listening to mine and FH love playlist. (That includes such romantic songs as Roxanne by The Police) It's strange though cause I look at the pictures online and I hate the dress and I'm not fond of the pictures of me. But in the mirror and on I feel like the prettiest princess that ever lived. \n\nHave fun wedding dress hunting.", "summary": "I didn't like my dress in pictures and IRL until I tried it on and now I'm in love and it was a stock dress which I did without my BM."}
{"id": "t3_1yru61", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] with my girlfriend [16 F] about a month her parents hate me.", "post": "So we had been face-timing every night for almost a month. Chemistry was great and we're really into each other. On friday I stole my parents car (I don't get my license for another month and a half), picked her up, and went on a date. We basically went to town in the backseat and agreed to go to prom together and blah blah blah. Then I get the fucking retard idea to go drifting in her schools parking lot. Cops show up, shit hits the fan. Now her parents hate me, texted me saying never to text her again, and are trying to forbid her from texting me. What do?", "summary": "I really like girl, but her parents hate me because their first impression of me was seeing me in the back of a cop car. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3wwfdd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[Update] I [19m] met this girl [19f] two weeks ago, I want to tell her how I am feeling about her before Christmas break...", "post": "Link to original post (sorry its long, I'm on mobile): \n\nSo not just 20 minutes ago I had her in my arms, we were enjoying our show that we are watching together (white collar, 10/10 would recommend if you haven't watched it). The episode we are on ends, and I then I stop it from auto switching to the next episode like I always do so we can either decide to talk or watch another episode. I had literally completed this short task, and began to turn my head like I was going to talk with her (although this time I was going to kiss her), when she announced that she better be going. She said she had more studying to do for finals and wants to get to bed early (completely understandable, it IS finals week).\n\nSo that obviously threw me off from kissing her. But in a last effort, I asked her to stay for just a few minutes to talk, which we normally do before she goes anyway, but she insisted that she really did need to go. So no kiss tonight.\n\nHere is where I need advice again. We only have this week till we will be away from each other for winter break. We don't know if we will be able to meet up once more or not. So what do I do, hope for the best? Hope we can meet up one more time, and if not, just leave it? Meet her right before she leaves for break, give her a kiss to think on? Should I try and call and talk to her tonight or another day this week? Should I just give up and not get my hopes up?\n\nI hate it when I catch the feels so easily. Damn me for being so slow on this, and for letting so many opportunities slip by me!", "summary": "I almost kissed the girl, but she said she had to go, right before I was about to go for it. Now I don't know what to do, because of the circumstances."}
{"id": "t3_36mpqk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] went out for the first time with a girl [26/F] after weeks of talking and she tells me she has a 6 year old.", "post": "After weeks of talking to this girl I met through Tinder, we met up at a bar last night. We're talking and she tells me she has a 6 year old. I'm taken by surprise because I felt this is something she should have mentioned sooner.\n\n I'm only 23 and I don't really like kids nor do I want them. I like to be able to play with them for a while and then be able to give them back. I still want to get to know this girl but I don't want there to be any expectations with me having to get to know her kid right away. What would you do in this situation?", "summary": "Went on a first date with a girl I've been talking to for weeks and she drops the \"I have a 6 year old\" bomb on me. I don't like or want kids and I'm only 23."}
{"id": "t3_sp4zu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redditors: Who do you need to ask for forgiveness?", "post": "I was online and reading an [article] about a young boy who asked to be transferred out of a class of a gay (but closeted) teacher in his middle school. The boy had been picked on and harassed by other students for being \"teacher's pet\". He couldn't handle it, so he asked for the transfer.\n\n38 years later, he apologized to the teacher for his disappearing from the class.\n\nMy own story is about a girl with Down's Syndrome in my P.E. class. She was fun and funny. Always cracked jokes and tried to make everyone happy. After spending most of the year with her, I had become the focus of most of her attention. Being a moody teenager, I didn't want this attention and would avoid talking to her.\n\nNear the end of term, she wanted to give me a hug. As she closed in on me, I turned around and walked away. I later wrote a letter to her asking her not to talk to me and to leave me alone.\n\nAs I've gotten older, that letter and my actions make me ashamed of myself. I never apologized to her or even looked at her for the next 2 years. I've tried to find out what happened to her since her graduation (children with Down's are developmentally delayed. She was 21 when she graduated), but I've never found anything. I would like to ask her forgiveness and I hope one day I will.", "summary": "Was mean to a developmentally disabled girl in HS because she liked me. I hope she can forgive a selfish prig."}
{"id": "t3_24fdtr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 F] with my ex-BF [16 M] of close to 1 year, First love/First heartbreak", "post": "First of all, I apologize for any/all spelling and grammar mistakes and sloppy writing. This whole situation has made me a crying, emotional wreck and my writing has suffered sufficiently. \n\nI'm sixteen and dealing with my first heartbreak. Now, I am a very logical and analytical person. I know my fears and worries are stupid. However, I just can't shake the feeling that I'm never going to find someone like him. I feel like I don't deserve to be treated like he treated me. He was the first guy to treat me well, and the only guy to ever make me feel loved. \n\nWell, we met on reddit. We facebooked, PM'd skyped, texted, everything. We talked almost all day everyday. I loved him and he loved me. He was the only person I trusted enough to tell everything to (self-esteem/body image/ depression issues), he was the only one to make me feel happy. He would always tell me that I was it for him. That he wanted to marry me and I was his soul-mate. \n\nWell, we broke up. He told me he would fight for me and that he'd make me trust him again, but he never did. Instead he \"fell for\" my now ex-best friend. Less than a week after we broke up. He's already moved on and I'm miserable wishing that we could be back together. Now I feel worthless and like I meant nothing to him. That our year meant nothing to him. \n\nIt's like being treated like crap for all your life, then suddenly finding that one person who treats you like a queen or goddess. Then, having that person stomp on you then wiping you off of their shoes like the piece of crap you truly are. \n\nHow do I move on from this?", "summary": "Ex-BF (first love) told me I was his soulmate. Now he wants my friend. I feel completely worthless and I have no idea how to move on."}
{"id": "t3_lqdg6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm only 20, but a rocky, abnormal start to relationships has left me jaded. What do?", "post": "(20, Male, University, busy with academic work and a couple of hobbies, good friendship circle etc.)\n\nIt's really hard to describe my feelings towards relationships. I've had plenty of crushes, have acted on them, and have been turned down or used emotionally (I was very naive at the start of university). Now, this isn't going to be some pity-party. That'd be silly. But I must admit that the prospect of relationships is kind of drifting out of my head as a possibility. To me this seems perfectly logical - if the only thing I've experienced has been, at most, girls who really can't decide whether they like me 'in that way' or not, then why would I see things any other way?\n\nBut here's the kicker. I know plenty of people drift quite seamlessly into relationships, even if these opportunities are rare. I know they're quite simple and straightforward, but my past experiences have left me quite jaded and cynical to the possibility of this being true.\n\nI'm not a virgin, and have had a couple of flings earlier in university. When I lost my virginity, it was enjoyable (in a 'finally!' kind of way), but ultimately embarrassing (including her telling me I'm 'weird', then sort of kicking me out of her flat (have no idea what I did wrong...)); and I guess I kind of have a negative experience. The second fling was a bit messed up too (was with a long-time friend), but far more enjoyable/awesome - only her being 'on the fence' made everything really awkward after the fact.\n\nWhat I'm trying to get at is, I have yet to actually have any kind of decent, 'normal', genuinely nice sexual relationship. Coupled with some memories I'd rather forget, I am left probably worse off than having no experience at all.\n\nI'm sure all of this doubt will kinda vanish once I'm actually *there*, *in* a relationship and I get to find out what the fuss is all about, but naturally, the process of getting there (e.g. meeting new people, and so on) is made harder by a really rocky start to relationships.", "summary": "Bad sexual experiences make me in a worse position than I would be without any experiences at all - this makes me cynical about what a 'true' relationship would be like. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_3gx9f5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [24/m] feel guilty I did something and wonder if/when I should tell her [20/f]", "post": "I've very recently started dating this girl - boyfriend/girlfriend wouldn't even be accurate labels. About a month ago I took her out for a date and it was quiet, though it seemed it went quite well (this has since been confirmed).\n\nI soon asked her out again, but she didn't get back to me for some time. I thought this was her shy way of letting me down gently; I've been turned down that way before and failed to recognize it the first time, being quite the socially unaware fool. I felt dumb for not being able to evaluate such an obvious thing and thinking she'd been interested in me - it'd be good to mention I'd had a change in anti-depressants at the time, so my mood was all sorts of whack.\n\nI fell back into a depressive slump for about a week. This passed and I started considering asking her out one more time in person to see if my impression were reality or due only to poor self-esteem.\n\nBut, after failing to work up the nerve for that, I sexted a random girl online, had some fun, and then I found my courage the day after and asked for a second date. We set something up, and we've been on a few more since then.\n\nThe issue is the guilt has set in and I don't know what to do. I feel like I'll have to confess it at some point - not now, we're not that deep into a relationship, but in the future. I understand the general consensus: it's not an issue, technically I'm single, it's not like we'd yet explicitly discussed an exclusive status, dating multiple people isn't unacceptable in the very beginning, etc. etc. But those thoughts aren't who I am, and she's a sweet, shy girl so I suspect it's not who she is either.", "summary": "Sexted a random girl online a couple weeks after the first date but before the second, feel guilty, I want some perspective, and I wish someone would agree that what I did is at least a little wrong."}
{"id": "t3_3pl0b9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by winning the raffle.", "post": "This happened back in Highschool. Grade 10, to be exact; I'm Canadian, so that should be 16? Anyways, I was in PhysEd when our gym teacher gave us raffle tickets and told us to sell them.\n\nWell, I procrastinated hard, to the point that I didn't try selling anything in the two weeks, until just the night before. I started freaking out, and after managing to sell half my lot, I said \"Screw it, I tried.\" Well, just before giving the remaining tickets, and money to the teacher, I got nervous, so I bought three more tickets. ($2 a pop)\n\nThe next day is the day of the Highschool basketball game. I don't care for it, so I head home. I come back the next day and all my classmates are giving me dead pan stares. The teacher stares through my soul and in the most serious voice, he asks, \"Where were you yesterday?\" I'm confused, and told him the truth.\n\nI find out that of the three prizes, I won two. The first being courtside seats on a freaking couch they pushed into the gym, as well as a private box of pizza and sodas for myself and one friend. Second prize was an authentic, Vince Carter signed basketball.\n\nI lost the couch prize, but the teacher saved the ball for me. The entire class was pissed, and the teacher just exclaims, \"You're fucking lucky as hell, you know that?\" (He was a chill dude)\n\nI was leaving the school, and was about to tear apart the packaging to play with the basketball, when the same teacher and a few others exclaimed and ran to me. They started having a betting war right in front of me. The price went as high as $100.\nI declined the offers, and just took the ball home and showed my parents. They offered to keep it stored.\n\nI didn't want to, I know Vince Carter would have wanted me to play with it, but when everyone makes a big deal about it, what can you do as a kid? I'll take a picture of the ball when I can, it's still with my parents. I've moved out when I married.", "summary": "I cheated and ended up winning the majority of the prizes, getting pretty much everyone mad at me. I now have a sweet basketball."}
{"id": "t3_20ebvz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my \"Friend\" [22 F] 1yr, Long Distance-y, make the move? Confusing love for passion? Hoping for some advice.", "post": "* Hi everyone, myself A (23) met N (22) while we were both traveling overseas in South America. A from NZ and N from Eygpt. We hit it off incredibly well and spent the next few weeks travelling together. It was a very intense and passionate albeit short experience. That is a year ago, since then we constantly have talked and skyped with each other. I haven't been able to get her off my mind, and nor her me - so she says.\n\n* We both agreed that as hard as it is we both do want each other to be happy and we would try to be happy for each of us to date someone. As we previously established long distance was never going to be a real possibility. We both looked into making the move and it seemed unlikely -  we both had plans. My plans fell through due to various reasons and now the plans I did have are not there anymore.\n\n* Recently, N just got into a relationship with someone and I didn't realise how much it would affect me. I haven't been sleeping right, it's all I can think about. We have talked about it a few times but it is difficult. I don't know if I am confusing my emotions but all I want to do is head over and be with her now. I proposed this idea to her and she seems kind of willing but hesitant for that it may not work out, that she just started going out with someone, what happens when I have to leave it might make things harder etc.\n\n* I just dont know what to do, has anyone been in a situation like this before? What happened? Any advice or something that can help soothe my psyche?", "summary": "Confused about long distance semi-partner, unsure on what to do, at my wits end. HELP!"}
{"id": "t3_4s4wsj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What on earth is going on between me [15/M] and a romantic interest of mine [17/F]?", "post": "Yes, I know this may be the wrong place to post, and that there's one specifically designed for teenagers. But hang on a second. This is a series of messages we've been sending back and forth.\n\nMe: Hey, next weekend, would you like to go out with me? Or if you're not free, the weekend after? :)\n\nHer, the day after: I'm so sorry I just saw this now but yes I'd love to! I should be free x :))\n\nMe: Alright, sounds great :) x how about [location] on Saturday?\n\nHer: Sounds like an awesome plan:)\n\nMe: Okay, cool. Can I pick you up at yours? And at what time?\n\n*no response*\n\nMe, a day later: So are you still up for [location] on Saturday?\n\nHer: Of course I'm still up for it <3\n\nMe: I'd like to pick you up at yours, if that's alright -- what time should I pick you up? X\n\n*no response*\n\nNow, at this point, I realised that I might have been a bit forward, asking to go to hers on the first date (the idea being I'd get her flowers). Fair enough.\n\nMe, two days later: Hey, if you still want to go -- how about meeting at [different location] instead of at yours? x\n\n*No response*\n\nMe, on the morning we were supposed to go out: Oh, okay. Nevermind :/\n\nNow, the last couple of messages weren't read at all by her, so it could be that she just wasn't available. But hang on a minute, she's been posting quite a bit on social media during the time, so what's that all about?\n\nAlso, this is completely different to what's been going on previously, where we would be talking regularly and often. So this is quite decisively against her normal behaviours. What's going on?", "summary": "Girl seems to like me, accepts a date, doesn't follow up on it when I ask to pick her up at hers, so I change the location, and she still never replied."}
{"id": "t3_4vowyc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "28 [F]: No butterflies when meeting 34 [M]. Confused.", "post": "I [28/F] met this guy [34/M] the other day for the first time after talking for almost a month. We met online, and clicked instantly. Since then we talked on the phone almost every night and slowly grew to really like each other. When we met for the first time, I felt no butterflies... just an instant comfort feeling. I didn't feel like that intense, nervous, immediate infatuation. We did end up having sex, and the entire time we were together, he just kept remarking on how \"good different\" everything was. \nI'm very confused. I purposely searched for guys that are not my type: passionate \"bad boys\" who party a lot. I've had a string of tumultuous relationships where the guy idolized me, fell in love with the idea of me, and once I fell from that pedestal it all crashed and burned. But, he's different. Very different...\nIs it possible to fall for someone without that instant tummy butterfly, fuzzy feeling? Or does this sound like more of just s friendship in the making?", "summary": "Met a guy who seems perfect for me. No butterfly feelings on my end. Is this normal to fall for someone when that fuzzy feeling isn't present?"}
{"id": "t3_3sgcmv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (28f) boyfriend (29m) very rarely will reciprocate oral sex to me despite my efforts to talk about it", "post": "So my boyfriend and I have been together for almost 4 years now and I would consider us to have a healthy relationship EXCEPT that he does not meet any of my needs sexually. Both orally and otherwise. \nBut my biggest issue is oral because the thing is that I go down on him on average about once a day. No joke or exaggeration, sometimes I do it more. And I enjoy doing it for him, truly, which is why I continue even though I don't feel like I should until I start to get more action from him. \nNow, I've tried talking to him about it in numerous ways. I've gently asked what he would do to my pussy next time he goes down on me, and other gentle applications of the subject. I've tried flat out asking him why he doesn't go down more often. I've asked if it has anything to do with my hygiene, tried offering ways to change anything I'm doing, and I'm always met with that he \"loves\" going down on me and that my lady parts are \"totally clean\" and then what happens? We get frisky and he has me go down on him and then I get nothing. And if I bring it up that moment he gets defensive and says things like \"sorry I'm not a better lover for you\" when he has the chance to be right then! But doesn't take it.", "summary": "my boyfriend very rarely goes down on me and I have tried in my opinion very mature tactics to get it back with no avail. And I'm getting desperate for a way to get through to him!"}
{"id": "t3_4d2e3h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 M] girlfriend [19 F] of almost 5 months didn't get me a birthday gift? Is it unreasonable of me to be upset?", "post": "I've been dating a girl at my college for almost the past five months now.\n\nMy birthday was two weeks ago, during our spring break. Before we left for the break (she came to my hometown for a few days), she told me she was getting me a gift, but that for some reason, she likely wouldn't have it by my actual birthday. I figured it was being shipped or something and told her that was no big deal, and that I was just happy that she was getting me a gift. \n\nOn my birthday, we went out for a nice little brunch at a French Restaurant to celebrate. After the meal, I thought we would split the check \u2013 which is what we normally do on dates \u2013\u00a0but she said she would pick it up. I thanked her and she wished me happy birthday. We spent the rest of the day together after that, went to an art gallery, etc. It was a really nice day.\n\nBut since then, there's been nothing on the gift front, not even a nice card. I realize that she may have \"gifted\" me the meal on my birthday, but if that's the case, I guess I'd say I'm not thrilled. After all the meal was like $30 total, and $15 isn't *that* much more than it would have cost in a split of one of our weekly dates.\n\nI would have probably broached the subject already, but there are a few reasons I haven't yet. First off, this past week has been really stressful for my girlfriend, and I don't want to add more to her plate. Further, she's also been pretty financially strapped lately, and it would be pretty awful of me to ask her to spend more money. \n\nWhat do you think reddit? Am I being unreasonable? How can I handle this in a way that is delicate but also effective? Should I wait until she gets another paycheck?\n\nThanks for your thoughts.", "summary": "My girlfriend didn't get me a birthday gift or even a card after saying she had, but she also is really stressed right now and doesn't have a lot of spare cash. I'm feeling hurt. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_nsjpb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Was what Penny Arcade did to Paul Christoforo the right thing to do?", "post": "I guess I'm taking a pretty big risk with my account reputation here...\n\nI just felt like I had to ask the question. I, like everybody else, think Ocean Marketting's PR stallion is a class-A asshat, and I understand that Paul was *particularly* stupid in acting that way towards Mike Krahulik, but I can't convince myself that Mike acted in the right here.\n\nPenny Arcade, and Mike Krahulik through it, command IMMENSE authority with the internet and the entire gaming community--so much so that I feel it could threaten to spread into other realms of this guy's life. Mike decided to power up the internet hate machine, and [some are already starting to feel the backlash.] As Dave observed many times in the original email chain, the Avenger is a fantastic controller, and now the product's sales are going to be affected by misguided hatred.\n\nThat controller was originally designed for the disabled. Is Ocean Marketing responsible for their new product's infamy because they had one awful, reckless marketer associated with it? Moreover, is there the possibility of Paul's actual life (read: not INTERNET life, like the rest of us) becoming endangered because of this and mob mentality? As Facebook, MySpace and Twitter prove to us, his identity and face are no secret, and there are now many, many, MANY people who dislike Paul Christoforo.", "summary": "Was Mike Krahulik justified in bringing the world crashing down about this guy's ears? Should anybody hold this kind of power?"}
{"id": "t3_mgpvs", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "When have you felt old recently, Reddit?", "post": "Let me preface this by saying I'm 17. In no way am I saying that I'm old, or even mature. In fact, let me be very clear and point out that I'm one of the least mature people I know. Including people younger than myself. So, with that settled, onto the story.\n\nAs I was browsing Youtube, I came across the whole \"Star Wars Clone Wars\" animated crap, and I realized that kids growing up with an animated tv series like that will *never* respect Star Wars for what it is. For example, in a lego short of Jango's death, Mace Windu *WINKS* at Boba after casually lopping Jango's head off. That was, quite possibly, the most emotional moment of the new movies, and they *KILLED IT*! IT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!", "summary": "I'm feeling old, reddit. What have you experienced/realized recently that made you feel old, sorry for future generations, or downright annoyed at something that has been killed?"}
{"id": "t3_2dyx4x", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by listening to my sister have sex on a voice memo", "post": "This all happened around three years ago when my older sister gave me her iPhone 3GS because she was upgrading to an iPhone 4. I was pretty stoked to own a smartphone (I had flip phones up until that point) so I immediately went in and explore the features that come with it. Later that night when I got board looking at the main apps I started diving down into Apple's bloatware. Apps like passport, news stand, game center and of course, Voice Memos. \n\nI was not prepared for what I was about to listen to. The first few memos were of my sister  (poorly) singing or saying shitting \"thought provoking\" quotes about life. But the last one was different. Expecting more stupid shit, I listened and heard something shocking. My sister's boyfriend (now ex) was talking to her and saying REALLY sexual things to her and you could hear them kiss. Suddenly, she starts to groan as the distinct sound of fucking was heard. This lasted for a full minute (yeah impressive time bud) and I was left incredibly disturbed afterwards. I'll never look at her the same way again.\n\nMaybe next time sis you make sure you've deleted **everything** before you give a phone away.", "summary": "My sister gave me hear old iPhone. Recorded herself having sex with her boyfriend. I found it. Shit was scarring"}
{"id": "t3_2uf8po", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by drinking coffee", "post": "This happened 12 years ago--I was 14. I was in the 8th grade, and before I left for school that morning I decided to have myself some coffee. I never really drank it before then, but thought, why not? Well, with my mom yelling that my siblings and I were going to miss our bus if we didn't hurry, I grabbed that big-ass cup of coffee I poured and chugged it like there was no tomorrow. Roughly four hours later (about 10 a.m.), my stomach is killing me--at this point, I am certain that a good vom session is imminent. I tell my teacher that I'm going to be sick and haul ass to the restroom (thankfully it was unoccupied). I rush into one of the stalls, get down on my knees, flip up the toilet seat, and take aim thinking I am about to barf like the Dickens at any second. Instead, I let out the wettest fart of my life, which coincided with an awful ass-plosion. Yes, I did not vomit--I shat my pants. And let me tell you, I shatt'em bad. My only reprieve was that I was still wearing briefs and hadn't yet switched to boxers. In shame and terror, I eked my way to the nurses office and told her I was sick (I actually just told her I vomited up a storm, rather than admit the truth). She calls my teacher to tell her I am going home; my mom arrived with 20 minutes or so to pick me up. (By the grace of God there was no stank or leakage). I walk upstairs to my bedroom, legs tightly clenched, and proceed to carefully remove pants and underwear; I stuffed all evidence into an old pillow, which I tossed into the garbage and immediately emptied. I cleaned myself up, took a nap and didn't take a single sip of coffee for a long, long time. To this day, the smell of coffee makes my sphincter wince.", "summary": "Chug coffee, hours later confusing stomach pains. Gonna vom? Nope, shat pants. The worst part of waking up? Folgers in your butt."}
{"id": "t3_2cjrxj", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Quit drinking - no weight loss?", "post": "So, I gained approximately 30-40 lbs after turning 21 - just the past year and 8 months. I would say a good deal of that came from drinking and the drunk eating. Additionally, I moved off campus for my senior year and found it easier to eat out or grab fast food for lunch and dinner rather than cook for myself or go to the dining hall on campus as I did my first three years. During my last semester of college I was easily drinking every day. Typically Sunday-Wednesday were \"light\" nights varying 2-4 beers, with Thursday-Saturday being heavy nights where I may have 8-10 drinks or more in a night. After graduating in early, I have drank maybe 3 times total and each time it was only a glass or two of wine. I've also been more responsible about not eating out (though still not perfect) and exercising.\n\nNow, I'm wondering why I haven't seen any weight loss. I've been trying to take the \"Ease into it\" approach, but it seems like even just cutting drinking I should be losing weight. Beyond that, no late night taco bell and mcdonalds runs, or pizza/pasta for dinner every night should be showing on the scale too right?", "summary": "went from drinking heavily for the past 1.75 year to not drinking for several months and have lost no weight. "}
{"id": "t3_3wlfeg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [20F] manage this possibly-mutual crush on a coworker [19M]?", "post": "6 months ago I started working in the back of a restaurant twice a week to make some extra money.  I'm the only female in a staff of all males, and I've developed a crush on one of the boys I work with.  This is all sorts of inconvenient and when I first started liking him I figured I would try to get over it quickly since I don't really believe in mixing work and play.\n\nWell, that was months ago, and since then the boy and I have managed to become quite close.  We go out after work with other coworkers, play video games together, and text a few times a week.  Definitely not best friends, but we sometimes joke about being bros.\n\nRecently he's been way more flirty than usual (me being the only girl in a kitchen full of 18 year old boys inevitably leads to some flirting regardless) and asked to hang out alone once he returns from vacation after Christmas.  I would really love to do this and would love for this to mean he likes me, too, but am afraid to say something because \n\na) if he does like me back, I'm not sure it's appropriate to be involved with a coworker (even though there are a few other boys in the kitchen who are dating female servers) \n\nb) if he doesn't like me back not only do I risk losing our friendship by letting him know I like him, but he might tell some of our other coworkers and the whole work environment could get quite awkward.\n\nSo do I let him know I like him?  Do I keep quiet about it and try to make it go away?  Do I wait and see how hanging out alone goes?  I feel slightly dumb about this because I'm very good at being direct with boys, but since he's a coworker I don't know how to handle this and I'm starting to like him A LOT.", "summary": "I have a possibly-mutual crush on a coworker and I'm not sure whether I should let him know I like him or keep it a secret because of professional and personal reasons."}
{"id": "t3_1i4i8x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[22M] with my ___ [21F] 1 year, what does this sentence really mean?", "post": "\"I want to be free of constant relationships to be able to make friends and know what I want\"\n\nto me: we are ldr during the summer and all last semester and she has lots of time on her hands. so her wanting to make friends by not being in a relationship is crap. She has nothing stopping her from making friends with anyone expect herself. So, this reads to me as \"I want to be single so I can flirt/hook up with a lot of people and do whatever i want with no consequences. she said its not that and it is just that she wants to make friends.. Except that makes no sense to me.\nHere is the reddit thread that she made. I honestly stumbled across it cause she was talking about a diff thread that the same account commented on. I thought the style of writing was familiar so i clicked it and yea... it reads 1,3,2", "summary": "GF thinking of breaking up to let herself make more friends even though she has more than enough opportunity to. I think its her bad excuse to hook up and mess around with ppl and not have to worry."}
{"id": "t3_112np0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by marching barefoot in freezing water", "post": "I'm in a high school marching band. Today, we were preparing for our first marching contest. It was 7:30 in the morning, it had rained the previous night, and it was about 50 degrees outside. We went out to the football field to practice for the contest, and as I got there, I had realized I had forgotten my marching shoes. Our director was coming out onto the field, so, in the panic I was in, I decided I had no choice but to take my shoes and socks off and go barefoot. I walked onto the field, and there was about an inch of incredibly cold water all across the field. Almost instantly, I felt a certain numbness in my feet, but I kept on. Everyone was either amused or horrified by my decision.\nI did this for 20 minutes. I could not feel my feet at all after a while. When I couldn't stand it any more, I asked my director if I could just wear my non-suitable shoes. He was angry at my forgetfulness, but when he saw my multi-colored feet, he felt pity for me and let me wear them.\nIt's 10:30 at night right now, and no, I don't have frostbite or hypothermia. The only thing that came out of this experience is that I look like a bamf in front of my friends.", "summary": "Forgot to bring suitable marching shoes to marching practice, had to march barefoot in ice water for 20 minutes, couldn't feel my feet, nearly had an encounter with frostbite."}
{"id": "t3_2wzeds", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Damages reported by landlord AFTER moving out, having written down no damages at all (France)", "post": "So, the etat de lieux (basically the French name of the check in / check out when moving in / out) was done and EVERYTHING was noted down as \"comme dans l'etat de lieux d'entr\u00e9e\" or so, basically that EVERYTHING is exactly like it was when we moved in. You get the idea. :)\n\nNow the landlord is claiming that the bed is broken (it was a furnished appartment, he even lifted the mattress during the checkout and looked at everything) the day after the papers were signed (papers done on Sunday, he sent an email on Monday claiming it was broken when he went to bed on Sunday evening).\n\nSince we have papers saying everything is OK he can't make any claims, I assume? Might want to add that he didn't ask ANY questions during the whole etat de lieux, basically walked around the flat and we followed him...but he never asked any questions, at all.\n\nHe claimed his flat back without proper notice too (email instead of registered mail) and we left within 5 weeks, so we made it easy for him to come back to France after getting himself fired in the US for something stupid and losing his work visa.\n\nHe didn't ask for any money yet but I'd like to be prepared in case this comes up. I'm a tad sad since, for once in my life, I tried to help others even tho it doesn't benefit me at all...and bam, we're running into such issues.\n\nThanks for your advice!", "summary": "checkout papers are stating no damages, landlord now claims the bed is broken. Can he make any claims? KKTHXBYE! :D"}
{"id": "t3_284zft", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "My younger brother is getting bullied and has become anti social, I need advice on how to break him out of his shell again.", "post": "I am eight years older than my brother, I'm in my mid twenties and he's just a teenager, but recently he has been getting picked on a lot in school. He's always been a really strict rule follower and if kids tried to cheat or skip class he would tell them not to, and I'm assuming he would tell the teacher. I'm not sure if it's because he has a learning disability, but he has had a hard time realizing that he is losing friends because of it. He has started getting picked on because of his height and weight even though he is quite skinny. \n\nTo try and help him feel more comfortable in his own skin I've been helping him eat better and start weight lifting (I have a bachelor's of science in exercise physiology and a minor in nutrition). While he's become more confident physically, he still struggles making friends and understanding how to fit in. I've had him come with me to social activities, but there is only so much I can do because of the age gap. \n\nSorry that this is such a long brick of text. But", "summary": "I just am looking for ideas of things that I can do with him to get him more comfortable around people and feel more confident as a person."}
{"id": "t3_4rrp6p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17M] trying to be as best as possible to my anxiety prone [15F] girlfriend .", "post": "I just recently started dating Penelope, who is two grades behind me. We met at our highschool during choir and musical; and, as youthful relationships typically begin, we are just wild about eachother.\n\nMy question is dual-faceted but I extend it to /r/relationships with the idea generally being that I am making an honest attempt to cross the schema gap to be the best boyfriend I can be.\n\nFirst and foremost, the most obvious difference between us is our age disparity of two years. This isn't a huge problem between us, but might be an issue in the future, (parents raising eyebrows, peers being skiddish, etc.) So, what are my ethical obligations to her, (being the older of the two,) how can I traverse the two-year gap so that we have more common ground, and what do I do about negative societal judgement?\n\nThe second factor contributing to my ignorance is that Penelope happens to have pretty bad social anxiety. She arbitrarily experiences episodes where she believes that I'm lying and that the relationship isn't real, and has difficulties talking about the way she feels. She experiences occasional anxiety attacks as well. Her anxiety isn't advanced enough for me to consider it a serious hindrance to our relationship, I knew her for a couple months with that knowledge before making the decision to move forward into a romantic relationship. What can I do to make her feel less embarrassed about her anxiety when it strikes? As somebody who does not experience the same issue, what should I know to be more educated and empathetic going forward?", "summary": "New girlfriend is two years younger, (a decent gap because we're still in highschool,) and experiences strong anxiety. What should I know, and what should I do in these regards to improve our relationship in the future?"}
{"id": "t3_4zxtou", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23F) struggling to breakup with my boyfriend (28M) due to his panic attacks", "post": "I don't believe in staying with someone because of a health reason. \n\nMy boyfriend who is a lovely person, but not the right fit for me in the long run due to various reasons including different interests and him seemingly forgetting to put effort into our relationship has panic attacks. \n\nHe shares a very personal story which I greatly appreciated him trusting me with about how when the last girl he was seriously seeing ended things with him, he had a panic attack and ended up in the ER. He had to take a week off of work and had a very difficult time, eventually getting a psychologist. \n\nHe has since stopped going to the psychologist.\n\nI do not see things going well with him. I'm bored with the relationship and were about to enter long distance which I'm just not down for. It was suppose to be our last night together and he fell asleep early. By chance I ended up staying in the city but I was so fed up by the end of that night I decided it was over. \n\nI am extremely worried about breaking up with him. It's not that I think I am his God given world or anything like that at all. For all I know he could want to breakup too. \n\nWe previously got in a large fight when we were drunk and I broke up with him. He said some extremely mean things about my health and I got up and said this is not what I need. \n\nHe broke down crying and couldn't breathe on his bed. I ended up staying the night and calming him down. \n\nThings got better since but I can't see this relationship lasting forever and I don't think it's fair to stay with him.\n\nDoes anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with this? \n\nI'm his first serious girlfriend in 8 years and the first girl ever to meet his family. \n\nThe last girl he had a breakdown over was a FwB who he said he fell in love with. \n\nI've made him promise before that if we did breakup and he got sick, he had to let me know if he wanted and I would want to help him. I do not want to see him suffer and he knows this.", "summary": "boyfriend previously had massive breakdown post last girl he was seeing. I'm the first girl he's seriously seen since and when we talked previously after drinking he had a breakdown. I don't know how to do this."}
{"id": "t3_1pqzkd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23/F] having trouble accepting my BF's [23/M] religious beliefs", "post": "Today after a conversation about religion, my SO of two years told me he sometimes worries that I think his beliefs are 'silly'. I didn't want to sound like an asshole and said that while I didn't share the same beliefs as him, that didn't mean that he's 'silly' to believe. \n\n...But honestly, as an atheist I try to put the idea that he believes in a god at the back of my mind because it's only once in a blue moon we talk about religion (he would never bring it up, he accepts completely the fact that I'm not religious) and it's something that I have a hard time accepting and it's the only aspect of our relationship that I just avoid talking about.\n\nHe then said he sometimes thinks that if I could change one thing about him, it would be his beliefs. I didn't really know what to say to this and sorta fobbed him off, not making eye-contact and said I love him the way he is (which is true).\n\n**My question is: Does it make me a bad person to admit that of COURSE I would change this about him if I could?** We were discussing the idea of what happens after death - I had said I couldn't think of anything more terrifying than continuing to exist for eternity while he said he couldn't think of anything worse than ceasing to exist - which completely baffles me and for the first time I realised that our views are polar opposites and will most likely stay that way. He believes there's something more than just chemistry that makes him 'him' and that he wouldn't want this to just end after death.\n\nI feel like a horrible person for admitting to myself that there's something about him that I'd like to change, while he's perfectly happy accepting the fact that I'll never hold any religious beliefs..", "summary": "SO is religious and I'm not - does it make me a bad gf to want to change this if I could?*"}
{"id": "t3_3u2tge", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Meeting my [21F] boyfriend's [20M] parents for the first time. Dating for 3 months, friends for about a year. Should I bring a baked good?", "post": "So, for Thanksgiving break, originally my boyfriend and I planned on driving down to his hometown, and then I would fly to mine soon after. It worked out because his hometown is on the way to mine, and he lives in a city so there is an airport.\n\nWhen his parents found out, then asked him if they could meet me (I've never met his parents, been dating for 3 months). They said I could visit and sleep on the couch for a few hours before my flight instead of sleeping at the airport. I wanted to be hospitable to them for being so kind without even knowing me. My question is, should I bring them cookies? I already made the cookies to be honest (I like to bake), but now I'm having second thoughts. I can always give the cookies to friends before I leave if need be.\n\nBeing desperate for an answer, I tried googling this. Most people asked about bringing flowers. This is something I would never do. I bake pretty often, so I didn't think cookies would be a big deal, and flowers seem too extravagant. He also has 3 little sisters (under 12) so I thought they would really like cookies. Plus it's Thanksgiving, and you know- food is a big thing. But one of the comments on a thread I read said \"Don't act desperate\", and that scared me. I don't want to seem desperate, even though I really do want his parents to like me. They are pretty conservative. I don't want to seem too far one way or the other (not too standoffish but not too desperate). Thoughts?", "summary": "Meeting boyfriend's parents for the first time. They are letting me nap on their couch before my flight. Is making cookies for them desperate?"}
{"id": "t3_3hj1ck", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Why is my ex moving on so quickly from the relationship when he told me that he was in love with me? I'm very confused.", "post": "My boyfriend (18) and I (female 19) broke up about 3 and a half weeks ago. About two weeks ago I called him for closure and he told me that he had no interest in talking to me ever again. He was clearly very angry and said that he had moved on. We broke p because my parents caught us having sex and he felt very uncomfortable so he wanted out. I saw that he now follows his ex on twitter (his ex cheated on him btw) and she follows him. Why would he do that? \n\nHe had told me before we broke up that he was madly in love with me and that he wouldn't know what to do without me. It was obvious that we both cared a lot about each other, so I don't understand why he wants no contact. Should I reach out to him?", "summary": "My ex is moving on so fast, even started following his ex on social media, do guys really move on within weeks from a girl that told they were in love with?"}
{"id": "t3_3sjtki", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 F] am desperately trying to be ok with my bf [18 M] watching porn, please help!", "post": "Hi everyone, I've been struggling with my bf watching porn ever since he started causing infidelity problems in our relationship. We've been better than ever recently and I've loosened up on the porn and I've been good with that as long as I don't know what he's watching. \n\nI recently saw a few gifs he was looking at on here (reddit) and I've always had a bigger problem with him viewing things like that because he could directly message them (which was a problem in the past). I'm trying to be okay with all of this the best that I can but he knows explicitly how I feel about viewing things people themselves post on the internet. \n\nWhat do you tell yourself when your sig other looks at these types of things? What advice can you give me on this? He always gets really defensive when I have issues about these things so I didn't know where else to go for help.", "summary": "I've been better about my bf watching porn recently but he's viewing irl people posting content on the internet. This is something he knows I'm not okay with because of his past infidelity."}
{"id": "t3_3i6qub", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24/M] think I may have caused a grandmother's death for rejecting her granddaughter [20/F]", "post": "Last Wednesday I hear that my grandma's friend's granddaughter is coming to my town to attend a nearby uni as an international student. I keep hearing things from my mom saying she's pretty, smart, etc. and that her side of the family takes an interest in me (in hopes of marriage). My dad is a very wealthy man in his native land and I attend a reputable school in the states so I guess they like me. \n\nOn Wednesday night I meet her and she is drop dead gorgeous. The craziest part is that her looks aren't even the best thing about her. She has traveled quite a few places in her life so she's very well-cultured and open-minded. We will call her Barbara. \n\nPerfect, right? Cept I'm in a really great relationship right now and wouldn't trade it for the world. So I tell Barbara about my girlfriend as I am introducing her to a mutual friend that attends the same uni as her. I also mention how I will be visiting her next week. \n\nThe next two days pass and I'm off to visit my girlfriend (we are doing long distance). On the morning of my departure I hear that Barbara's grandma fainted. Later that night I hear that she had passed away.  \n\nI feel like a narcissist saying this but I can't help to feel that her grandma's death is my fault. I know for a fact that Barbara told her mom and grandma that I already have a gf and that id be visiting her this week. I can't help to think that I caused the grandma's fainting and death. \n\nRight now I feel terrible for being far apart from Barbara, who is all alone in a foreign land and starting school. But then again I owe my girlfriend a good amount of dates since I have not seeing her for a while. I plan to go back in a few days but am tempted to go back earlier.\n\nWhat should I do? How should I feel? What do I tell her the next time I see her? I feel so lost and confused.", "summary": "Indirectly rejected girl saying I already have a gf and then her grandmother fainted. Is this my fault? What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_199gvx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can we get on the same page about our future?", "post": "I (27/f) am going to lose him (26/m) because we can't seem to get on the same page. We've been together for a year and a half and I think deep down we both want the same thing but we keep missing each other and I can't even explain it much less understand it fully. \n\nHe wants someone he can build a life with and will be his intimate partner as well as his business partner. He wants to make future plans for the financial security of his family and he wants that all to start now. I want that too but he doesn't think I do. He is not convinced by the words that I say, but I truly mean them. \n\nHe doesn't want to live with me right now or even spend a lot of time with me because he's soooo busy with work and educating himself on future security. Among other reasons he is a man who needs quite a bit of space. I can't commit to his picture of a long term future together if I don't even see myself in it in the short term. I don't feel that there is a real commitment now, how can I skip steps and plan a long term future? And I can't seem to get him to grasp that point. \n\nTo him business and personal life are one in the same. I separate the two. I certainly cannot be his business partner if I cannot see myself as his life partner. We're currently separated because we don't see eye to eye and I am afraid of losing him. I might have already lost him. I have never felt so right, so good, and so whole about someone in my life. He is it. He is amazing. WE are amazing when it works and we have so much to give and learn from each other. There is a powerful connection there. However I feel his head is constantly in the clouds while I'm trying for the basics of the foundation. And I fear I cannot get my head in our future if he cannot get his head in our now. What do I do?!", "summary": "Boyfriend keeps dreaming about the long term but wont lay any basic foundations NOW for our future together. It's tearing us apart."}
{"id": "t3_4imohz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My Crush [16F] is throwing me [16M] for a loop. Need Insight!", "post": "2 months ago she got out of a bad relationship with a guy who treated her like crap. She is funny, outgoing, and very energetic. Occasionally she is a bit flirty with some guys.\n\nWe talk every night over text, and we have a class together. We always tease each other, and joke, and laugh. Some of our discussions are really deep. She has told me a lot of stuff that she hasn't told too many other people.\n\nShe said at first that she was not looking for a relationship, but recently she said she is looking for a guy who can show her that he deserves her, because shes tired of being treated like crap.\n\nToday, for example, she wanted me to share a chair with her while we worked on our project together. She would look at me and laugh, whisper into my ear, and get real close to me. She would rest her head on my shoulder. We were teasing eachother the whole time, but she seemed genuinely flirty.\n\nBut when our other group member took notice and asked if we were dating, she quickly and blandly said no, like it was nothing. This isn't the first time either.\n\nShe sometimes talks about enjoying the single life, but also asks me if she will ever fall in love, and about how guys are always interested in her. Some nights she will give me a full layout of info, others she seems aggravated and ends the conversation shortly.\n\nA lot of times she tells me about how great I am, and that she would be dumb to lose such a great friend. But when relationships emerge in the conversation, she usually say something like \"I hope you find the right girl, youre such an amazing person\".\n\nIts just so on and off, and I need a few pointers.", "summary": "She is physically flirty, and has contradicting statements about relationships. She either full on flirts with me or treats me more like a friend."}
{"id": "t3_138omz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I handle my POS neighbor who is now deliberately blasting surround sound/etc?", "post": "My husband, 7 year old and I live in a 100 year old building on the third floor.  It's casual, rent by owner, not corporate.  There is a landlord on site, but he is a puss and is rarely here anyway.  Our new downstairs neighbors have a surround sound system they play video games and watch tv on until 4-5 am.  It shakes our apartment so bad, and it is so loud we can't even hear our tv.  Last night they were hammering on the walls at 3 am.  I knocked on the floor to let them know, hey, not cool.  They decided to make hammering song like crap for an hour as retaliation.  I asked the landlord to talk to them and he said he would go right up, but they still do it, and louder I might add, plus the banging on the walls and you can hear them laughing.  I'm at my wits end, and need advice.  My husband wants to silently get them back like getting deer urine at the hunting store and pouring it in their door frame or something along those lines.  I'm afraid if I show my face, they will key my truck or something of that nature.", "summary": "My asshole neighbors deliberately have their surround sound on and bang the walls till 4am and the landlord talking didn't help."}
{"id": "t3_49lkrt", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I feel stuck in a 3 year relationship that I don't want to be in.", "post": "I (m/31) am currently in a relationship that I want out of.  I would have ended the relationship over a year ago, but tragically her mother developed cancer.  I would have guilted myself to no end if I dumped her while she was going through that ordeal.  \n\nUnfortunately, her mother recently passed.  She's understandably heartbroken and I know I need to be there for her now more than ever, but I still desperately want to be free of the relationship.  \n\nShe's VERY invested in our relationship, which will result in a lot more heartache that I really don't want to put on her right now.  Am I committed to sticking it out with her for as long as she's so emotionally distraught?  Am I in this for at least another year or 2?  I know I owe her honesty, but I just don't know if she can handle any more stress at this time.", "summary": "Girlfriend's mom developed cancer and passed.  I know I need to be there for my g/f, but I really just want to be out of the relationship"}
{"id": "t3_1ixf7j", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "[Rant/Spiritual Awakening] My sister said my wedding dress made me look like a sausage. LADIES DON'T LET ANYONE RUIN YOUR ENGAGEMENT GLOW!", "post": "Yep, my 28 year old adult sister was watching me try on my wedding dress, and I mentioned that I wanted to lose 5-10 pounds before the wedding.  Her response was \"Oh good!  Then you won't look like a sausage for the wedding!\"  Uhh..rude?  \n\nIf any of you remember that AMA a while back about her family shipping her off because she was \"demon possessed\" that was me, so I'm not at all surprised that someone in my family said something hurtful, but it still hurt.  And I panicked.  When I found out I was getting a huge bonus from work, I broke down stressing about whether or not I needed to go get a brand new dress because the other one made me sausage-y.  \n\nWell, you know what?  I love my dress.  It looks amazing on me, and if someone thinks I look like a sausage, they can keep their opinions to themselves because it makes me feel AMAZING.  Don't you ladies let anyone drag you down, because I promise you they WILL try.  They don't even deserve the time it would take you to be concerned about the things they say or do.", "summary": "YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND WONDERFUL AND YOUR WEDDING WILL BE PERFECT BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT!!!"}
{"id": "t3_4v8itu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[23M] GF's[24F] visa to live in the UK expires later this year. Looking for some new perspectives on our situation.", "post": "My girlfriend is Malaysian and has been studying in the UK for the past 3 years. We have been in a relationship for 2 \u00bd years now.\n\nHer visa to stay here is coming to an end later this year, then she will be forced to return to Malaysia despite opting to stay here if she had the choice. We have gone down the job route, to the point that she was offered the job here, but the employer failed to get a license to issue Visas on very petty grounds.\n\nI (and others) have suggested getting married. It is something we've discussed before, and we are both happy to do it except that she refuses to get married before she goes back as she feels like she will just be doing it so she can get a visa, rather than because she will actually be married. She's happy for me to propose in 6 months, but not before she returns. The problem for me is that the delay will mean we are not going to be close to one another for at least a year, perhaps longer, other than for short visits (we both will be working full time).\n\nRight now, I am positive and optimistic about our situation as I think that we can make it work, but two people living in entirely different cultures on opposite sides of the world might mean that we change a lot.\n\nCan anyone offer any advice on how to make this work, or just a new perspective on the situation?", "summary": "Girlfriend's visa is expiring and she has to leave the country for at least a year. Advice on how to make the relationship work and some new perspectives are what I'm after."}
{"id": "t3_3wgftj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my gf [19 F] for a little over a year, I'm graduating and it's causing problems", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nSo this is a pretty short post, but basically I only have one more semester left in college. This has sparked lots of emotions and confusion of what we should do.  I love this girl to bits but we have had our fair share of problems, and a lot of the problems were caused during summer and last year's winter break.  Basically, it is apparent that we cannot handle long distance and we have said it before in the past.  \n\nI should also mention I go to school with her but I live a state away during the breaks.  There is a huge chance I am going back after college to come back home and find a job somewhere which is what my sister did when she graduated college.  \n\nMy question to you guys is I have no idea what to do now, winter break just started and we have already been freaking out cuz the date is getting closer and closer to me graduating.  It sounds like we have an expiration date but it is really hard for me to understand what to do with this situation.  It is really hard to force a breakup when things are not going that poorly.", "summary": "Graduating college next semester, gf isn't and long distance is not an option. I have no idea what to do."}
{"id": "t3_lpa27", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Should subreddits with niche appeal be allowed to become default subreddits?", "post": "For the uninitiated: Default subreddits are subreddits with a certain number of subscribers which makes them visible to people who aren't signed into reddit or haven't added or removed any subreddits.\n\nI'm finding some of the default subreddits (i.e. atheism and politics) tend to be very off putting, it's not even about the principle of what is being argued or discussed but the way in which it is and the communities comments behind them.\n\nBasically they're offputting and can scare away people who don't agree with these set of narrow principles these sorts of subreddits offer. So if you're religious you might be put off, if you're a Republican or conservative in general you might be put off, so on and so forth.\n\nSubreddits which are more neutral and encourage intelligent discussion tend to be far more welcoming to all, subreddits such as videos or funny's are neutral anyway and would probably be a good 'hook' for new users.\n\nI hesitate to recommend reddit to friends because they might see some of the incredibly narrow and arrogant opinions expressed in certain default subreddits and just associate that with me, which is not something I want.", "summary": "default subreddits should be picked based on the quality and neutrality of their content and not on the amount of circlejerking and subscribers."}
{"id": "t3_3wi4tc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Secret Santa Debacle - Me [32F] + Work Colleagues [M + F late 20s/early 30s?]", "post": "I read this subreddit religiously but as my husband and I can't agree on what I should do here and I have nobody I can talk to about it, I'm posting here. Am on mobile so sorry for any spelling/grammatical errors. \n\nI've organised my work secret santa/kris kringle this year as I do every year. Our team has a few interstate people so they're included too. It was all opt-in and anyone interested signed up via the Elfster link so it wasn't like I pressured anyone into participating who didn't want to. It's a $20 limit/budget. It's up to the gift giver too if they want to reveal their identity at the end.\n\nAs I'm friends with a lot of people in the office, I already know who a lot of people have as they've asked me what to get their secret santas. One guy who is interstate (let's call him Dougie) told me he has my work friend Trish. He was in town this week so when I saw him he gave me his gift for Trish so i could hang onto it for him and give it to her next week when we do the exchange. \n\nYou guys - He told me he picked it up from a 7-11 on his way to our work xmas party. It's a little blue wooden clock that looks like he got it from the $2 shop. Not to mention - Trish was with him waiting outside when he ran in to get it and was joking that he was probably getting his secret santa present from a convenience store. \n\nWhat do I do? He's given it to me to wrap and give to her. I really want to spend my own money and give her a different gift (like a word of the day calendar or something she would actually like - English isn't her first language) or maybe just drop it at her desk anonymously the morning of - but my husband is saying it's not my problem. But it's such a shitty present... she's going to be really disappointed when she opens it. Help.", "summary": "Girl at work is going to get a crap secret santa gift. Do I get her a replacement gift instead or try to fix it?"}
{"id": "t3_1vmcys", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] am unsure how to tell my mom [53F] that I plan to move in with my boyfriend [23M] instead of her.", "post": "I'm in my final year of university, and have been planning my next move now that this phase of my life is coming to a close. My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months. We met and began dating in the city where I currently live, and 6 months ago he relocated to a city about 2 hours away for a job. We decided to give the LDR a try, and we've made it work. We have discussed in depth the concept of me moving in with him and looking for a job in his area when I finish school. His area has many job opportunities in my field, and we are both certain that this is a positive move for both of us.\n\nMy mother is convinced that I need to move back home to quickly pay down my student debt (which will be less than $10k). I see her point, and initially agreed - we had this conversation while my boyfriend and I were in an argument, which was a result of the distance, and has since been resolved. Currently, my mom thinks I am 100% moving back with her and my dad [53M].\n\nI don't have a strained relationship with my mom, but our relationship certainly improved when I moved out to go to school. When I do visit my parents, I spend the most time with my brother [17M], who will be moving out to go to school in the fall. I don't think my dad has an opinion of where I go, so long as I am happy.\n\nMy mind is made up about where I want to go - I have given it a lot of thought and after weighing my options, my boyfriend and I decided that we want to move in together. I'm afraid that when I tell my mom what I've decided, she will be hurt and object. I've never had to approach such a topic with her before, and am unsure how to proceed.", "summary": "My mom thinks I'm moving back with her and my dad when I graduate from university, but I've decided to move in with my boyfriend instead. How do I tell her?"}
{"id": "t3_4h6umt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20f] roommate [20f] chews with her mouth open", "post": "This ones pretty self explanatory. Best friend/roommate and I have been living together for 2 years. Her chewing has always annoyed me but I've never said anything, but recently a few friends commented behind her back that her chewing was annoying. She has talked before about being a mouth breather, meaning that it's easier for her to breathe through her mouth than her nose, which is probably why she chews with her mouth open. \n\nI've held off for so long, but I felt kinda bad for her when some friends said her chewing annoyed them. I started to wonder if it might be easier for her to hear it from me than, say, some guy who's dumping her after a few dates or something because her chewing is a turn off. (I know, that's a more extremes situation that's not likely to happen but you know what I mean.) she's a pretty sensitive girl and I don't want her to feel bad. so... Should I say anything? Should I just ignore it like I've been doing? Thanks guys.", "summary": "roommate chews really loudly to the point of multiple people noticing. Should I say something as her best friend or keep quiet to save any hurt feelings?"}
{"id": "t3_23w1yl", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Need advice on tech school socializing", "post": "Hi guys! I am a future freshman from Europe (I am a male and I will study in the US) at a tech school. Although I am smart, I am not very geeky (actually not at all) and I like to have fun. I am not into wild parties every night, but one every weekend (or at least every couple of weekends) is a priority for me. These are my problems:\n\n* Tech school students are not that much into partying\n* I am international so I basically have no idea how to be cool with Americans\n* (because of these two) I don't know how to find the wright people to hang out with (geeks --- wright people --- wild animals)\n* I heard that some weirdos rat people for no good reason, like drinking a beer in the room or coming back from a party drunk, and this may seem like no big deal to citizens, but I am on visa and they will find any reason to kick me out, so how do I stay away from those guys\n* (Q) are there places where each type of students usually hang out?\n\nCould you give me advice on how to deal with these problems and stay away from the dark side at the same time? Thanks!", "summary": "How do I find people with whom I can chill with and have fun at the same time (not like reading a book kind of fun) at a tech school?"}
{"id": "t3_4khs47", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By ruining several thousand dollars worth of clothes.", "post": "A few hours ago I nocked over a can of paint while me, my brothers, my mom and my step dad were moving things around upstairs so we could paint the roof and walls. It splattered all over their racks of clothes and the floor. We filled up the bath tubs with water and put their cloths in them and put soaked towels on the floor. My mom left to get a rug doctor, some paint thinner, rubbing alcohol and mineral spirits from the store. We got the paint out of the carpet but it wouldn't come out from most the clothes. Does anyone know how I can get the paint out with something more effective than paint thinner, rubbing alcohol, or mineral spirits? Also I've been using a sponge to get it out, do you guys know of anything more effective than a sponge?", "summary": "nocked over a can of paint that got all over a bunch of clothes, can't get it out of the clothes."}
{"id": "t3_28aqba", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU when I danced with a girl and tried to make a joke", "post": "This happened within the past 36 hours, so it's more of a T\u00bdIFU\n\nIn my hometown there is a Swiss hall that has annual events.  During the day there is Swiss style wrestling (which I compete in) and at night a dance with plenty of food and drink all day.  At the dance I was trying to build up some manliness to ask a cute girl to dance, and lo and behold, she sees me standing awkwardly a few yards off and beats me to the punch.  I have known this girls family vaguely for many years even though I see them several times a year at the hall.   So we're dancing and having a good time, and she is much better than me.  The music mainly consists of slower dances.  I keep stumbling around (I'm not even drunk) and try to crack a few jokes.  I say that I should cut of my toes so that I stop stepping on hers.  She gives me a strange look and a half laugh and we keep on dancing.  Later that evening I am talking with my best friend who is that girl's cousin.  He hears that I was dancing with her and asks if I knew she had a prosthetic leg. I most certainly did not know this.  Later I would find out that everyone but me was aware of this.   I now understand her uncomfortable reaction to my 'joke' and why she asked her sister if she wanted to switch dance partners.", "summary": "While dancing with a  girl, I said I should cut off my toes so I stop stepping on hers, found out she has a prosthetic leg. "}
{"id": "t3_37mt8j", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by asking my GF of one month for a booty call.", "post": "Im going to green text this cause it's the only way I can explain.\n\n\\> Be me\n\n\\> 17, bored, horny af\n\n\\>Birthday is coming up next week\n\n\\> Pick up my phone and start texting GF\n\n\\> Ask her how her day was, etc.\n\n\\> finally we get to a pause\n\n\\> thisismychance.gif\n\n\\> *hey my b-day is coming up next week, anything you want to do?*\n\n\\>*not really* she replies\n\n\\> *well we could uhhh.... do the do?*\n\n\\> *what?*\n\n\\> abort.jpg\n\n\\> *I have only known you a month you . I don't think I can stay with you if this is how you're gonna act*\n\n\\> fuck me, i am an idiot\n\n\\> Bye for now, don't talk to me in the morning please\n\n\\> relationship.exe has been terminated, no backups found\n\nI swear to god I did not mean for this to happen, I am a selfish idiot. I did apologize, but to no avail. Am I a bad guy for wanting this? I'm probably an asshole.", "summary": "Half-assed an attempt to get some, failed miserably. Now single, and probably hated by EX's friends."}
{"id": "t3_1ohkg7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think my girlfriend is mad at me. What should I do?", "post": "I am 22 [F] and she is 19 [F]. We have been dating about 2 months.\n\nHere's the thing, I know she is busy and probably tired but can someone be so busy as to not spend a second seeing how their significant other is doing? We met online and she lives in Mexico while I live in the U.S., so I understand a that it is harder to communicate. We used to message everyday and now I'm lucky if she messages me back and if she does, she stops after a short while. I do text her to see how she is doing but I feel like I'm annoying and needy and wait for her to go first. I realize this all sounds a little selfish of me but it is clawing at my mind and I am literally crying myself to sleep over this. Does she hate me? Did she find someone else? Am I as boring as I think I am? I don't want to ask her because I'm afraid I'll make her feel bad and make me look like a crazy needy freak. Also, I don't want her to start messaging me more just because I complained about it. I seriously can't sleep and I feel so stupid.", "summary": "I am afraid that my girlfriend is upset at me. I don't want to cause problems so I'm avoiding the issue."}
{"id": "t3_2ultkk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is my [18 M] ex [19 F] leading me on?", "post": "We dated for about 1.5 years, and then decided to try seeing other people. There were some complications in our relationship, but we were happy while it was going. \n\nI recently told her that my feelings for her were resurfacing. We talked tonight, and she said that she felt the same way, but didn't want to get back together. When I asked why, she said she didn't want her friends to judge her. She said she wants to wait a few months for them to grow on the idea, but still wants to text and talk to me like we have been doing the last week (very often, like if we were a couple). \n\nIs she telling the truth? It seems like she is leading me on, but she doesn't seem like someone who would do that? I just need a second opinion reddit.", "summary": "Girlfriend says she loves me but doesn't want to get back together to avoid judgement, but wants to wait and get back together at a later date."}
{"id": "t3_2na39u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24/F] feel so lonely despite my relationship with [20/M] 1 yr together", "post": "Sorry I don't know if this is the right place to post, but I'm feeling so horrid right now. \n\nI have been with my current partner for 1 year now, and I have given up alot to be with him (moved to another country, even). When we first got together we had the most beautiful relationship of my life, I had never been that content with anyone. \n\nFastforward to now - he's asleep, clueless of any problem and I'm lying here wanting to cry...same as every night for the last week. \nWe barely talk any more, he comes home from work in the evening, plays his phone for a few hours (despite my requests to spend some time together/watch a movie/anything) and then he goes to sleep. When we do talk, I feel like it is meaningless small talk (\"oh its hot today!\"), and not lighthearted conversation like we used to have/like couples should have. \n\n...he won't even be intimate with me, and pushes me off when I hug him, saying I'm being clingy and annoying (I probably am by this point, I'm desperate for answers). I have explained how I feel to him, and he tries to assure me he still loves me. I ask him why we have changed and he denies that anything has changed, or says he will try harder but then the next day its back to the same old...\n\nSorry to sound like a neurotic headcase, but everything is different, and I don't know why. I feel like he doesn't love me anymore, and I'm beyond depressed about it. And in turn, worrying that by having this depressed and unhappy attitude will push him away even further because I'm not my old happy self. Its a vicious cycle - I can't pretend to be happy because I feel wretched, and being unhappy around him is sure to make it worse. \n\nNOTE: He doesn't have time/opportunity to meet any other girls so I'm not worried he's cheating, since he comes straight home from work every day/his only mobile is our shared one.", "summary": "I am depressed and terrified my boyfriend doesnt love me anymore. He says there is no problem. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_11c4e0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by leaving the house door open.", "post": "This happened a couple of hours ago, and i'm still a bit nervous about all this. I'm what most would consider a hardcore gamer, and as most people into this, they usually cherish and collect their favorite games and such.\n\nToday I skipped work because i woke up feeling like something had banged on my left side, hurting all over (ear infection, it's a reoccurring thing, I need to get this checked more often than not.) and decided to stay home and rest a bit more.\n\nI stayed home all day and at about 6 my dad rolls around to pick me up to go to the ER to see what's going on with my ear. During the following hour and a half I spent on the ER to get this checked and pick up the prescription the doctor gave me, I get home and find some clothing on my porch, lying on the path to my entrance. My dog was feasting on some plastic bag and at first I thought it was just some kids who'd have thrown a bag of old clothing onto my yard.\n\nAs soon as I get up to my room though, things took a dire turn for me. I froze, looking baffled at what was right in front of me. My monitor was all crooked and the cables were off, and I look to the left and see this gaping hole where all my consoles were. Then it finally sunk into me: Someone robbed my house.\n\nShit Shit Shit!", "summary": "Was sick, stayed home. 6PM went to doctor, left front door open, got my consoles stolen. TIFU."}
{"id": "t3_23peaw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO(24M) didn't get into the school of his choice and I(21F) don't really know how to be there for him because I'm happy.", "post": "Okay, to start off, I know my title is making me sound like an uber bitch. Please let me explain. \n\nMy boyfriend, lets call him Bubba, have been together for almost four years. We've been friends for almost seven. For the past two years I have been living with him and his Mother. My Mom and I had a very bad relationship, so his Mom graciously invited me into her home. For the most past, we really love each other. We do fight, but I can honestly see myself settling with him. He's the most generous man I've ever encontured. \n\nBack to the question, Bubba applied to a very prestigious school. I can't afford to leave the city yet, so I was just going to move downtown and go to school there. This would mean we would be close to three hours apart. I know a lot of people can make long distance relationships work, but I knew I couldn't. It's been making me miserable thinking about not being with him whenever I want. Plus, we have two cats and he would be taking them. I didn't want to split them up because they love each other. \n\nToday he found out that he didn't get in. Of course, he is crushed. He's now doubting his intelligence and the fact that he went back to school. He took off a few years and when we started dating I motivated him to go back. Since he has been back, he has been excelling in every class. Everyone thought he would get in without a problem. To make it worse his sister got in and his parents, unintentionally, tend to compare them to one another. I want to be there for him, but I'm happy. I feel like a sick bastard saying that, but I am happy. I didn't want him to leave. I figured he'd go off and find someone much better than me. I'm being very selfish, I know...\nHow do I sincerely be there for him without coming off fake?", "summary": "My boyfriend didn't get into the university of his choice. How can I emotionally be there for him when I'm happy."}
{"id": "t3_15ovm0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by vomiting in my fiances pants.", "post": "We get home and put the pizza in the oven, while we waited for the pizza to finish I thought I would go ahead and have an energy drink. I downed that in a few minutes. Big mistake. My stomach started to hurt a little but I said what the fuck and went for the nice greasy pizza when it came out.\nSo about five minutes after I finish my pizza I get the brilliant idea to go down on my fiance. She gets in front of me and pulls down her pants and I start to please her. I stop for a second because I think I have to burp. NOPE. It wasn't a burp it was vomit. I threw up the pizza and energy drink I just had into her pants and it ran down her legs. She just stood there and took it. The pain and embarrassment crippled me to the floor and I just laid there and wept for a few minutes while she cleaned herself up.", "summary": "had greasy pizza and an energy drink, few minutes later tried to greet my lady with my tongue and greeted her with stomach rejected food instead."}
{"id": "t3_2nicaz", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I have an urge to kill one of my cats.", "post": "We have 2 cats. One is a fantastic indoor cat. The other one is lives outside. This cat was a gift from a friend who got it from a shelter. It was injured and overall nasty. No big deal, we took it to the vet and nursed it back to health. This is where the weird stuff starts.\n\nThe cat did nothing but sit behind the toilet and shit on the floor. We tried to teach it to use a litter box but it would just go back to pooping and peeing on the floor. Then it got violent. It started hissing and jumping at the kids when they would go into the bathroom. The climax was when it attacked a child while she was just playing video games and ignoring the cat. The cat ran to her and started scratching and hissing at her. I threw it outside.\n\nThis cat now just sits on the deck looking in the window and meows until we feed it. After feeding it leaves for a few minutes and starts the meowing again. More compassionate people than I have let the cat inside but it immediately stands at the door and meows to go back outside. \n\nI feel an irrational amount of resentment for this cat to the point of wanting to put it down. It has seemingly no redeemable qualities and has caused much damage to our house as well as attacking the children. If I were alone I would have done it already. I still may.", "summary": "My cat ruined the carpet, scratched my children, and meows incessantly after I saved its life. Now I honestly want to end its life."}
{"id": "t3_1ickkj", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Rising senior. Can anyone recommend me a major/career based on my description (warning long)?", "post": "I'm torn as I have many interests but none of them seem to lead to a good career. If I am capable of being an engineering major but I don't particularly like the sciences but I prefer the arts, should I pursue it anyway to have a well paying job? Same goes for being a pre-med student although the whole process seems way too long.  \n\nBut that's the thing, as much as I love art, I have zero talent for creating it, just appreciating and consuming it, especially film.\n\nFrom Lars von Trier to Paul Thomas Anderson, Kim Ki Duk, and Dardenne brothers to name a few, I love studying film. My other interests are equally lacking in job prospects such as philosophy, religious studies, women's studies, and literature. \n\nI have average GPA so I can't into top top schools, so I'm already set on my state flagship. I've already taken all the standardized tests. The only thing left is choosing a major or a department to apply for.  \n\nHere are some of my numbers that reflect my academic abilities.\n\n3.5 unweighted (but 3.2 during my last year due to laziness). \n\n4.3 weighted (pretty much every class has been IB or \"pre-IB\" w/e that means) \n\n2300 SAT. 780 Math + 740 Reading + 780 Writing\n\n800 SAT II Math II, 720 Biology. \n\nAP Exam: 5's and 4's on BC Calc, European History, English Literature, English Language, Chemistry, Spanish Language. (Govt + American History from first 2 years) \n\nI've found ^ none of the classes to be interesting. Only class I enjoyed was a philosophy elective when I became obsessed with existentialism, Sartre and Camus (but this seems to be a typical first year kinda thing).  \n\npersonality wise, I'm very good with people and socializing, although I prefer to avoid public speaking.", "summary": "decently smart (hopefully? but everyone likes to think of themselves as intelligent so take this as a grain of salt) "}
{"id": "t3_1y3rul", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26 M] GF [22 F] says she loves me, doesn't mind if I don't love her back", "post": "I have been dating this girl for about 7-8 months.  We have had some conversations about how neither of us is looking for anything too \"serious.\"  I just got out of a very long term relationship about 6 months before I met her, and have had difficulty with relationships since then (ex was mentally abusive and relationship was terrible).  \n\nI try to be a good BF, take her out, make her feel special, and am generally a nice guy.  She means a lot to me, is one of the sweetest people I have ever met and is a really genuine, caring person.  \n\nLong story short, she recently told me she loves me. I was sort of dreading this moment, responded sort of awkwardly of course with a \"thanks\" (not joking, I said thanks). Its not that I don't care about her, I just don't feel that emotion towards her and don't really expect to. I am not a very emotional guy, and have only told one person before that I love them.  \n\nTo my surprise, she just said \"I know\" when I told her this.  She wasn't expecting me to say it back.  She said she doesn't mind at all that she loves me and I don't love her, because she knows how I am.  Not gonna lie, this blew my mind.  Now I'm struggling with the feeling that I am somehow wronging her, or taking advantage of her, because she is more invested than me in this relationship.  \n\nI don't want to react wrongly, but am I crazy for feeling that its just wrong for both parties to a relationship to know that one loves the other, but the second doesn't love back?", "summary": "GF says she loves me, doesn't mind if I don't love her back.  Am I crazy for worrying about this?"}
{"id": "t3_2qxj5g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I (27m) quit smoking pot in order to find a relationship?", "post": "For starters, not sure if this is the right sub and format and everything. So please let me know if I messed anything up here. \n\nI feel like I'm a decent catch. I have two college degrees, a great job in my field, workout 5-6 times per week (and have ~9% body fat and a bit of muscle definition), pay my bills on time, and have a few thousand dollars saved up to buy my first house. I also smoke pot almost every night. \n\nI'm responsible about it. I don't smoke and drive, I take care of my business for the day before I smoke, and I try to minimize tar inhalation as much as possible. Also, I now rarely drink because I simply prefer to smoke.\n\nI'm about a year out of my last relationship and feeling really good about myself. I've gone on a couple dates from OKC, but have yet to find a good match.\n\nI know pot is a deal breaker for at least some women and am wondering whether I should quit in order to increase the number of potential matches. I also feel like there are other reasons to quit like health, job opportunities, etc. But the main one for me right now is to eliminate it as a deal breaker for potential relationships. If it wasn't for that, I wouldn't be considering quitting right now.\n\nShould I change my lifestyle? I don't necessarily see smoking as \"wrong\". But I don't love being a pothead either. What do you all think?", "summary": "Should I stop smoking pot to be more \"attractive\" to women or try and meet someone who approves of my lifestyle?"}
{"id": "t3_34zeh2", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Just want to be loved by my wife again. Insights welcomed!", "post": "Me (M29) and my wife (F29) have been married for just one year, and had dated for four prior. Over this past year, we were lacking in the intimacy department. This was my fault, I foolishly thought that our emotional connection was enough and didn't need sex as much. I was quite wrong and now understand that. \n\nAnyway, this led my wife to feel rejected by me and she fell out of love. After this came to my knowledge, I have changed the way I look at our relationship, and have readjusted my priorities in it. I want nothing more than for us to work things out. \n\nRecently she had an affair with her boss (who is 50 years old and also engaged), and says she has real feelings for him. This sounds bad I know. But I understand how it got to this point.  She is trying to give us a chance, and things are getting better (sleeping in the same bed again, I get a kiss goodbye in the morning, spend time together after we get home from work etc), but she still has feelings for him, and seemingly slightly less feelings for me.  We had a fight about it, I yelled (which I have never done in an argument during my adult life), but I told her that I forgive her even though it hurts. \n\nShe says she cares a great deal about me, but is having a hard time loving me again after being rejected so many times.  \n\nWe're starting marriage counseling next week, and she seems optimistic about it.  I guess I wanted to get other women's thoughts on my situation. What do I need to communicate to her, is there anything I can do to salvage our marriage.", "summary": "I was a bad husband, which led my wife to cheat, wanting to save our relationship and looking for advice/insights."}
{"id": "t3_1jesoc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[20M] with my friend [21F] of one year, Conflicted on what to do", "post": "I am not sure if this right place to post this, if it is not I am sorry\n\nOk so I am gonna make this as short as possible.\n\nThis married woman i have been sexual with in the past via a threesome with me and my ex (she was not married at the time) has come back into contact with me as we get to talking she confessed to me that she has had strong feelings for me since our sexual encounter and i confessed the same. She then tells me she is very unhappy in her marriage and regrets it. This goes on for about two months or so and I am falling for her hard she also tells me that she would be lost without me and she cant go a single moment without thinking of me. The confliction comes in because of my moral beliefs and the fact that I don't want to be the sole reason of a divorce.\n\nPlease pardon any errors, I am using my phone to post this and I have huge fingers.", "summary": "Friend cam back into my life tells me she has feels for me, she is married and hates her marriage, what should i do"}
{"id": "t3_3bx6sm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my three roommates [21 F] and best friends of three years: I was bullied and stolen from all year and am finally moving out next month. Is there anything I should do or say or is this something I just need to move on from?", "post": "My initial post from earlier this year:\n\nSo things never improved since I posted that. They talked about me within my earshot to make me feel bad, stole food and alcohol from me, had parties most nights of the week, and then continued to expect me to be my cheery self around them all year. I haven't spoken to them in two months, but my stuff keeps getting broken and stolen. There's no proof it's them, but it's not like I would hide/break my own belongings. It's been expensive (lost around 500 dollars in belongings) having to live with this treatment. I can't get past my anger about all of this, and don't want to take the financial hit from just moving on and not talking to them anymore.", "summary": "Is this one of those things I have to just move on from? Or is there any way I can't get them to pay me back for the stuff they broke and stole?"}
{"id": "t3_3h381q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21F] boyfriend of 3 years [23M] is making me very uncomfortable with his friend [18F]", "post": "He met this girl at his old job.\n\nShe posted booty pics, bikini pics and constant selfies on her Instagram, and my boyfriend likes every single one of them. \n\nWe've had discussions in the past about his Instagram activity - him following scantily clad models and porn stars which I've said makes me feel uncomfortable because of the level of interaction there. \n\nHe has this girls number and has her on snapchat and Facebook etc, and him liking her bikini pics and booty pics makes me uncomfortable.\n\nHe had a previous friend who posted nudes on her twitter constantly, which made me uncomfortable but I feel like I can't tell him to unfollow his friends so I didn't say anything - for other reasons they are no longer friends and don't talk anymore, so she's off all of his social media, but I feel like this other girl is heading the same way. I can't tell him not to be friends with people but I dislike that he's liking these photos.\n\nAm I being unreasonable? What do I do?", "summary": "boyfriend liking semi-nude pics and literally every single selfie of his friend - I'm uncomfortable, what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2m1gsf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with a love interest [20 F] of 8 months, did long distance but came to visit and found out about her sexually abusive parent and now we can no longer date because she's projecting the past onto me.", "post": "I need a bit of guidance.\n\nI found the most amazing women I've ever met. She's well read, sharp as a tac, beautiful, wants all the same things I want etc etc.\n\nWe've been doing a LDR for a little over half a year now and we finally bought tickets to see each other. She lives in Hawaii so I took 11 days off work and flew out to see her.\n\nWe smashed together like magnets. For the first three days there was nothing that could separate us - and we could tell this was going to happen because of how attracted we were to one another.\n\nSaturday night comes along and we're in bed and things are getting frisky. Nothing crazy just some intimacy and BAM. It hits. She withdraws. We stop. That's it.\n\nWe go to Church the following day everything is fine and then a few hours after Church she withdraws again. Avoiding eye contact, physical contact, conversation, everything.\n\nTwo days of tears and craziness she alludes to some serious sexual abuse as a child. I have no grasp on this. She will not share and my assumption is she is projecting the abuse onto me and it's just a crippling fear I can't help her with. She told me she's horrified of men and that we can never see each other again.\n\nI bought a ticket back home that leaves tomorrow (7 days earlier than planned). I'm holding on by a thread here. I'm not sure how to handle this. I fell for her and now she's so far removed from my life I'm at a loss. The rugs been pulled out and I don't know what to do.", "summary": "Did long distance with this chick only to find out that after flying to Hawaii to see her that we can't date because she's horrified of men."}
{"id": "t3_2hyuwc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My Girlfriend [18F] cheated on me [19M] in our LDR the other day, I want to make it work but need advice", "post": "So my girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year and a half now and we've been doing long distance for the last month and a half. Most of the time we've spent together has been great, although we have had a few rough patches, it's never been anything we couldn't work through. \n\nBut  a few days ago we decided to take some time to ourselves, continue dating, just cut contact for a week to have some alone time to figure things out. We made it very clear that we would stay exclusive and not do anything with anyone else in the meantime. Today was our first day talking again and she immediately told me she had cheated on me the night after we stopped talking. She hadn't been drunk or anything, just made some bad decisions and one thing led to the next, her and this guy, we'll call him Steve, had slept together. \n\n She is deeply sorry and hates that she did it, she wants to try to keep our relationship intact, and I do too. Steve was a friend of hers away at school and they haven't talked since. I told her if she wanted things to work between us, that her and Steve could not remain such good friends. I told her it was okay for them to hang out in group settings because I understand that they have the same friend group and to cut contact with him entirely, she would have to cut herself off from almost all of her friends up there.  \n\nI'm just having a hard time accepting that she would do this, because it's so against everything she stands for. I'm also having a hard time trusting her now because we will have to remain in an LDR for another 2 months, then I will be up there as well and we can be together, but until then I can't bare the thought of her seeing this guy every day or so and I don't know what I can do to just improve this situation in general. \n\nAlso, Steve will actually be in town where I live over the weekend, and I want to confront him, but I'm not sure that's such a good idea.", "summary": "My girlfriend cheated on me in our LDR, but we want to make it work, having trust issues and issues proceeding from here in general."}
{"id": "t3_4jenji", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] and my SO [23 M] have been dating for about 6 months and I'm emotionally drained...", "post": "Here's some background:\n\nI've been told multiple times that I'm unsupportive, I don't care, and that I don't put in any effort into the relationship. Mind you, I've given my SO permission to use my car to drive to X, Y, and Z places without much complaint, picked him up from work, brought him home, and always gave him money regardless of the financial situation I was in due to the burdening costs of commuting to school every day. During the semester I did not work because of my schedule, and the money I had to spend on supplies (Visual Arts major), food and gas was fairly limited. Therefore, I've always squeezed pennies and sacrificed many things that I needed to foot the bill for my partner. \n\nIn addition to the stress of not having money to spend in general, my partner would put pressure on me to get to certain places on time and rarely took my schedule into consideration before berating me for being late. I often found myself becoming very tense and uneasy when we made plans because I felt like I was walking on eggshells if I didn't arrive on time, or if I had to cancel at last minute. If plans were cancelled, all hell broke loose. I was constantly told that I was wasting his time and that I messed up and everything was my fault, even if it was out of my control. Keep in mind that the average time it takes to travel from my house to his was about 45 minutes without traffic. This meant I had to get up extremely early and commute at odd hours of the night as he was dropped off and went to bed as soon as he got home.\n\nI've addressed the topic of inconsideration several times, but of course, I am wrong and I'm selfish for only thinking about myself.\n\nIn addition, I've put up with my partner intentionally ignoring me for long periods of time as he was engrossed in his phone and seemed to be bothered if I made any attempt to engage in conversation. Of course, I was generally upset by his behavior and have put up with this longer than the duration of his past relationships.", "summary": "My partner thinks I'm unsupportive and defines me as a terrible girlfriend although I sacrifice a lot for the sake of his needs. Am I wrong for feeling emotionally drained/upset?"}
{"id": "t3_2s82l3", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Can I begin my Australian Working Holiday Visa trip with only \u00a31500 (Around $2800 AUD) in 3 months' time?", "post": "Hello, I have just got my Australian Working holiday visa. I have my backpack, my sunnies, and most of everything else I need.\n\nI am planning on landing in Perth in 3 months' time where I have food and board covered. I am staying with my aunt for at LEAST the first month where I will hopefully be able to find employment in Perth, even though I hope to get a job secured before I land. (I have years of bar and restaurant experience, as well as experience in retail, I'm sure somebody, somewhere will have a position for me, I am very employable and very determined.)\n\nSo, to begin with, my only expense will be frivolous things such as drinking, and perhaps the odd unforeseen purchase.\n\nMy flights to and away from Australia are already covered. I do not need to worry about those.\n\nI know that most people say that you need $5000 in your bank account when you arrive in Australia to prove to immigration that you can look after yourself, that you will not be a burden on the Australian system. However, subtracting food and board, and my return flight from that $5000, will I still be allowed in with only around $3000? I have read around that this number does have some lee way with all factors taken into account. Push comes to desperate shove, I could locate funds from another source to bulk out my bank account when I enter Australia, but I would prefer not to.\n\nThoughts? Thanks1", "summary": "Most people say you need $5000 to enter Australia on a visa, I have $3000, but have room and board and my flight home taken care of from outside sources. Can I still go?"}
{"id": "t3_41ftjf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] with my _gf__ [27F] 3 years, broke-up, was it a good choice?", "post": "I have girlfriend who is 8y older than me and she has kid with her ex husband. We were in a really good relationship, almost like perfect but today we broke up because today we got some time for only us two and she spent that time being on computer. And i told her like you have been all our free time on pc or phone and well one thing lead to other and ended up basically that way she said im too bad in bed and etc... and i said fine, i don't want to be with you anymore and she said that's great because i don't want to be with you too. Sorry it's very bad and unclear post because english is not my native language.", "summary": "Broke up with gf after 3 years because she doesn't spend time with me and im bad in bed. Was it a good choice or should i fix thing because i really love her."}
{"id": "t3_39ifea", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by promptly breaking up with my girlfriend.", "post": "So this one happened a few weeks ago. Things have been complicated since and maybe not all is lost but the incident was worth writing about anyway.\n\nSo I had been with my girlfriend for just over two years. We have always had problems but there's always been a lot holding us together. I've known her since high school and was secretly talking to her for years without telling my friends or hers (would have made things complicated). So anyway here I am ready to break it off because the differences are becoming too great and \"maybe we just want different things\" you know the drill.\n\nI go to her house. Its really difficult because she's my friend and I love her still. I've rehearsed what I'm going to say and I know if I dont start right away it'll turn into an argument and I'll get lost. I want her to know how I feel and that its not her fault, so when I get to hers we walk upstairs and I sit her down and start talking.\n\nI tell her everything. It turns into finger pointing anyway. I choke up a lot and tell her I want to end it. She doesn't take it very well, and remains ice cold. \n\nAfter a moment or two in silence she says \"oh by the way your anniversary present finally came but I guess i cant give it to you now\". It had been our anniversary maybe 3 weeks prior to that. I took her to an expensive restaurant in the city and we had a good night, but she had said she didn't have a gift and i didn't mind. So I plead with her to show me. I mean we made it two years, the gift was for that, and it still meant a lot to me. She reluctantly walks me to her room and reaches under the bed.\n\nMy (ex?) girlfriend pulls out this big frame with a comic book cover in it. We're on the front cover. Its a professionally drawn artwork of us as the heroes of a story we'd always joked about writing together (where we manage competing slushie / slurpee stores, also fight crime, discover each other and join forces. Its called \"affairs in justice\" [just-ice]).\n\nMy heart sinks and my jaw drops. I'm a fucking idiot, what have I done?", "summary": "Break up with my girlfriend without giving her a chance to give me the most heartfelt (belated anniversary) present anyone has ever given me."}
{"id": "t3_2igfjv", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Canada - From West to East in 4 Weeks!", "post": "Hello everyone,\n\nThe next summer I will be traveling with my brother, mom and dad from West Canada to East Canada with a camper. We got family in Canada which we wish to visit while traveling from west to east. We are starting at Vancouver then head towards Calgary to meet an uncle of mine and then continue our journey to Toronto which is also our final destination. In Toronto I got a lot more family. We also wish to travel through the Rocky Mountains as that is something we really wish to see.\n\nOther than that we still have no clue what we should visit. I did some research and found a couple of interesting places but I don't know if it is actually worth going to so I decided to ask in here. I have been following this subreddit for quite some time and always enjoy reading the stories and advices people give here. \n\nSo now I am wondering if people who have done this before know where we should have a look. I am really excited to visit Canada, I think it is a gorgeous country but I really want to get the most out of it.\n__________\n**Some details:**\n\n**Start:** Vancouver\n\n**Guaranteed Stop at:** Calgary\n\n**End:** Toronto\n\n**Date:** early summer, think July.\n\n**Interests:** the nature, the culture, mountainbiking/hiking (basically experiencing Canada's nature), swimming, no extreme sports (jumping out planes, bungiejumping that kind of stuff).\n____________", "summary": "going to Canada this summer for 4 weeks with family. Traveling with a camper from Vancouver to Toronto and passing by Calgary. What MUST I see?"}
{"id": "t3_kzvm3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I've never job hunted for anything besides a teaching position--any suggestions?", "post": "I've taught for two years (in two different schools) as an English teacher.  Both times I've had to leave because of budget cuts, but left with excellent recommendations.  This last summer I foolishly only applied to private schools for a change, and now it's October and I'm essentially unemployed.\n\nI have a few part time jobs that help pay the bills, but I want a big boy job.  I've never job hunted aside from teaching jobs, and I have no idea if my degree will help me get a job anywhere else.  I would be eternally grateful for suggestions of what kind of positions I could look into or where to find them.", "summary": "What jobs can I apply for that an English Teaching degree and a skill set from two years of teaching experience can get me?"}
{"id": "t3_397zf8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Don't know what to do about my[26F] friend[20M]'s sleeping schedule. I'm trying to help him wake up earlier and get going with his life, but it's not working. It's taking a toll on our friendship [3y?].", "post": "My friend seems to need a lot of sleep. For one thing, though, he stays up quite late playing games with his friends. But then, he often doesn't get up until ~3pm. That's around 12 hours of sleep! Is that normal at all for a 20-year-old?\n\nFor weeks I've been calling him in the morning to wake him up, as a backup to his alarm. The problem is, he doesn't wake up when I call. He speaks to me (albeit groggily, but still), but then *goes back to sleep*. He says he'll text me to prove he's awake, but he never ever does. I always text him first and I've suggested he go to the doctor about it, but the office has weird hours and you can only call on certain days? He's often not up in time for that.\n\nAdditionally, he has been applying for summer jobs but doesn't give himself much of a window because of his extensive sleeping. \n\nPart of me feels I should just give up calling, because he might need to just want to change badly enough. The other part feels like I can't give up on him. I don't want to let him down. However, I am tired of feeling like a human alarm clock.\n\nMaybe this isn't the right sub for this, but under this whole sleeping issue, we are very very good friends. I don't want to become so frustrated that this ruins our relationship. I want to help him, but I just do not know how. (Saying \"stop being friends, he's not doing *you* any favors\" isn't exactly an option.)", "summary": "Friend wants to change sleep habits. I'm trying to assist but nothing seems to be working. Afraid relationship will deteriorate."}
{"id": "t3_41z7wm", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[M19]Need Advice on Showing Interest in Person I Rarely See", "post": "I am a student at college, and there is this girl in orchestra who I think fairly obviously has a crush on me. She seems like she would really be my type, so I am interested in trying to see where things go. The problem is I have only talked to her a few times, I don't have any way to contact her other than our university email addresses, and we sit far apart enough that I would really have to go awkwardly out of my way to talk to her in orchestra. I want to talk with her, but I also want it to be in a way that doesn't make a complete ass out of myself if I am misreading the situation (I'm not exactly a social butterfly). The only thing I could come up with was emailing, with no prior contact with her, something like \"hey, can you help me out with this one part in the music,\" but I thought that might be a little too transparent. Any other suggestions/comments? Also this is a throwaway account because reasons. Sorry for any spelling errors, I'm typing on mobile.", "summary": "I would like to show a girl I think likes me that I potentially like her but I have no plausible reason to talk with her, and I haven't spoken with her very often previously."}
{"id": "t3_2okdih", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Bike tour around the world?", "post": "Hi there redditors! \n\nFirst of all I'd like to apologize for my English, but as you will see (I hope not), I'm not a native speaker.\n\nI'm 23-year-old who recently graduated from university and just stared my first job. Now, you see, my job is interesting and all, but it's an office job and I feel I'm not suited for this. I'm the adventures type, I want something happening around me and going to work from 9 to 6 is just killing me.\n\nThe one thing that I thought of is a bike trip mostly in Europe, Asia and North Africa. The problem is that I'm from a country with an average salary around 350 euros or 450 USD. My salary is a bit higher - around 450 euros, but still not enough according to what I read is needed for such a trip, witch is about 30000 USD.\n\nMy question is if somebody has done something like this without any money and if they have some tips for me. I'm thinking about sleeping outdoors or helping some locals for food and a place to crash. Is this something that could work out? I'm planning to go with my girlfriend and I think not too many people would take us in.\n\nAny help would be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "I'm a broke ass guy who plans a bike tour around the world with his girlfriend but doesn't want to raise funds or beg for money. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3svygk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21m] and my girlfriend [22F] together for 3 months. She's great but its just missing that spark?", "post": "I met my girlfriend a little over 3 months ago. We hit it off and started dating immediately then quickly moved into a relationship. \nI was trying to move on from another girl who was sort of jerking me around but who I really cared for. So in a sense I may have rushed into this current relationship.\n\nMy girlfriend is great and I know she really cares for me. She has already dropped the big L word and I was very confused at that point because those are not my feelings at all right now.  My family really likes her which is extremely important in my eyes. The problem is that I just dont feel that great connection that I've felt in the past with other girlfriends. I'm not sure if its because I was really hurt by the last person I fell hard for and dont want that to happen again? Or maybe that I just am not that into this particular girl. I really can't make sense of my lack of feelings.\n\nI guess the", "summary": "here is: How long do I stick with this relationship to see if I develop the same feelings that she has for me? And is it fair to her that I even stay in a relationship if I am unsure?"}
{"id": "t3_473psv", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by leaving my car in neutral", "post": "This was about an hour ago.\n\nSo my brother has a stick shift honda accord, and since my car was in the shop getting some work done. I borrowed my brothers honda. I was in a rush to get into my local safeway to pickup stuff to make dinner tonight. So not being used to driving stick, I didn't think to put the e-brake up. I just don't have the habit in me. So I leave my car and I'm inside shopping when I hear an employee announcing \"Owner of a Honda accord (insert license plate here) please come to customer service.\"\n\nSo I knew that was my car, I went up and there was a girl there that explained to me what had happened once I had left the car.\n\nHer story:\nShe was trying to back out and noticed a car a few car stalls to her right was also backing out. So she waited and realized this car is still backing out and has plenty of room to leave. And it continued backing and she realized theres no driver. So she hops out of her front seat and rushes to my car and starts pushing my car away from the car that was in the stall behind me. A few other people came to help and thanks to them there was no damage and my brother will never know what really happened while I was borrowing his car. \n\nMonday, am I right?", "summary": "left my car in the parking lot in neutral and didn't put up the e-brake. Went inside to hear my license plate being read because my car had rolled out of the stall."}
{"id": "t3_2cw7kl", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not inspecting the contents of the McDonalds cup", "post": "It was a normal night, I'd just gone to bed and was about to take my glasses off. I set them on the nightstand, but it was wet and sticky. I remembered that we went to McDonalds previously and had left a cup with some coke left in it. It was leaking. It was just pop so I drank it as fast as I could and put my glasses back on the night stand after wiping it up. It tasted slightly weird as I was drinking it, but I was drinking really fast so I didn't fully notice, but when I pulled my lips off the straw, the most intense taste of windex filled up my mouth and I started gagging. I went into my girlfriends room which was right beside it, she was sleeping but I thought drinking windex or whatever cleaning chemicals she put in there was cause enough to wake her, and asked her if she put anything into the McDonalds cup. She said \"no\", surprisingly. I said \"That's weird, because it tastes like chemicals\" to which she probably fell back asleep and didn't respond. I went back to bed and thought about what it could be and fell asleep shortly after, not coming to any real conclusions. I wake up this morning and am about ready to go to work when girlfriend walks in my section of the basement. She lays down beside me and we start talking. She started by saying she's been up since early and that she had some time to think about stuff and that she remembers me asking about the McDonalds cup. Apparently she was so tired when I woke her up that she gives those asleep responses that people give when they're not fully awake and seem to be responding without being conscious when she said \"No\". She said she put two Lysol Wipes in the McDonalds cup. Gross. But the problem is that I remember her talking about having to clean up some cat shit from the basement where we sleep.", "summary": "I drank a McDonalds cup full of Lysol Wipes used to clean cat shit because I thought it was the pop I left in there"}
{"id": "t3_441s0u", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "About to contact Collection Agency to repay debt", "post": "With a decent income tax coming in the next few weeks I've decided to take care of 2 derogatory marks on my credit report from 2 debts that have gone into collections, one for a good 3-4 years at least and the other being from about a year ago, maybe 2 years ago. I am receiving 1500$ in my tax return and would like to handle my 2 outstanding debts of collectively $1000 ($700  & $300 each debt with a different agency.) I've yet to contact the debt agencies as it has been a few years since I've seen any letters and I've never received any phone calls, I've gathered the phone numbers and mailing addresses of both companies but I'm not sure how I should proceed. Its my understanding that I can maybe get a debt settlement on both of these accounts for a much MUCH lower cost than the price of the debt and would like to pursue a pay for delete option and AM willing to pay the debt in full but if I can negotiate the price down a little that would be extremely beneficial. My question is should I contact the companies via phone and request something in writing (Debt verification?) and then reply solely via snail mail? or could I do everything over the phone and have a negotiated payment made and have documentation mailed/emailed to me afterwards to keep for my records? I've read a lot of stories on here of people calling and negotiating payment over the phone as low as 20% of the debt total and not having it come back and bite them in the ass but I guess I'd just like a little clarification or advice on whats the best route to take. Thank's for reading my wall of text up there ^\nreally appreciate it :D", "summary": "Best way to handle Collection  on 2 years old debts ($700 & $300) via phone all at once or through snail mail for paper trail plus paper records."}
{"id": "t3_1e3pqh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by drinking flavoured milks all the time", "post": "I like the little cartons of flavoured milk and before you open then you give them a quick shake to stir it up. I don't usually have soft drink but in the case of a University musical theory exam I thought I could use something fizzy. \n\nI sit down, exam begins. I pick up my bottle of coke and give it two quick shakes and immediately open it, not realising what hell I have unleashed. It spews all over me, my phone and the chick sitting in front of me drenching her. She screeches like a wild yeti and here I am holding a now completely empty bottle with ruined exams in a 3 metre radius. I look like a complete jack ass and the professor didn't have any spare exams left so I will have to do it tomorrow. The chick I soaked burst into tears too, I apologised but it was too late for that. \n\nPhone is toast too.", "summary": "Shook a bottle of coke like I would a flavoured milk in an exam. Ruined exams, phone and social life."}
{"id": "t3_35mzrx", "subreddit": "college", "title": "How would I email my professor about an unfair grade? or how would I convince them to give me a higher grade?", "post": "First off, I apologize for the pretentious title. I don't know how else to word it as it is the truth/my true intent.  \n- *English is not my first language.*  \n- *This college class is an online dual credit class.*  \nLast semester, I made a B in ENGL 1301. I knew it was due to my procrastination and laziness. This semester, my overall grade is an 89%. I hope to make it an *A* with the final tomorrow. The professor stepped it up for ENGL 1302 and my classmates have all fallen behind with *C's* and *D's*.  \nI turned in an essay^1 and got a high grade compared to my classmates. One of our other major projects it to revise one of our two past essays. I followed all of the instructions, got it peer-reviewed, and corrected the flaws I got marked off for on the original essay^1.  \n**I was given the same grade for my final draft.** My classmate with a high *D* turned in her revised essay and received a very high grade that brought her up to a 70. *Except she didn't change her essay at all and her original grade for that essay was an F.* My other failing classmates have received high grades despite barely editing their original essays. I believe that the professor has given them higher grades to keep them from failing near the end of the semester. Their overall grade went from high 60's to low 70's.", "summary": "How do I email my professor to give me a fair grade without sounding demanding or betraying my classmate?*  "}
{"id": "t3_2l9yhs", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Is my recruiter looking out for my interests?", "post": "This is my first time working with a recruiter.  I've been working with her for a couple weeks and I'm not sure what's normal in this process.  I live in San Antonio and the recruiter is in Dallas.  She asked me to come up for an initial interview (Mon.) with her to make sure I was serious about moving to Dallas.  Two days later she called me back to set up interviews (Fri.) with two companies.  When I asked her if the companies will provide any relocation assistance or travel reimbursement she said no relocation and didn't address the travel reimbursement (I unfortunately forgot to ask her about the travel again because the topic shifted).  She called me back for another interview with company \"A\" which they want to set up for next week.  Company \"A\" recruits exclusively through my recruiter, so I know that I'm the only candidate they've asked back.  When I asked my about travel reimbursement this time she said she didn't even ask the company because people don't provide that assistance at this level.  Is that true or is my recruiter just looking out for the company's interest instead of looking out for me and the company?\n\nExtra details:\nI have a BA in Comparative Literature and 2 years of work experience.\nMy recruiter said she's been a recruiter for 13 years.\nI told her that my minimum salary is $42,500 (unless the whole benefits package is really phenomenal and in that case $40,000).  I was previously making $40,000.  The two jobs she got me interviews with would offer $40,000 (I know that one of them has excellent benefits, but I don't know about Company \"A\")", "summary": "I just found out that my recruiter isn't even asking the companies about things like travel reimbursement and I'm having to travel 5 hr (600 miles round trip) for interviews.  Is this normal?"}
{"id": "t3_lgx4e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Passion fading from my relationship", "post": "Hi Redditors, first post, figured I could get some advice.\n\nEarly this summer I started dating a girl whom I've known for about 10 years (met in middle school/high school, apart during college, started hanging out again once I returned home after college). When we started dating, things were really great, really easy, and went really fast. Within a month we were already so close and I could see myself marrying this girl within a year or two (I'm 23, she's 26). We get along great, spend decent time together, and I can tell that she really cares about me. She has all the qualities of a good spouse, good mother, good life partner.\n\nWe've now been dating for 4-5 months and things are starting to slow down and I'm becoming less passionate about the relationship. I want to be with her, but i'm not crazy passionate about it. I don't wake up every morning with a burning desire to be with her, crazy about being with her. I know that it's unrealistic to have this feeling every minute of everyday, but I haven't felt that way since the first few weeks of our relationship.\n\nI also have to admit, even though it makes me feel shallow and a bad person, that my attraction to her isn't top notch. I am attracted to her, and we do have a physical aspect of our relationship, but she's not the most attractive women I know (or dated).\n\nI should also mention that we are both christain and that God is a central part of our relationship. Its something that we can share together and has been a good way to bring us together. I've slept with 2 girls before, she's a virgin, we have decided to wait before marriage to have sex. I'm ok with it, though I do fear that it will have an impact on our intimacy (possibly a source for my lack of attraction?)\n\nSo what should I do? Am i expecting too much from the relationship? Is physical attraction an unimportant thing in the long run as long as we have an intimate connection? If I choose to ignore these feelings, will they come back to haunt the relationship later?\n\nThanks for your help.", "summary": "GF is awesome, good/healthy relationship. Attraction is not super high, passion is fading. Is that a sign of we shouldn't be together, or too high expectation/wont matter in the future?"}
{"id": "t3_n8ksj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "In deep with money issues. Need advice.", "post": "First off, sorry for the length.\n\nI need some serious help. My husband and I have been having pretty serious problems with money. It isn't that we are lazy, we are just in a really tight spot. He has tried posting on r/Frugal, but didn't get any advice other than \"don't spend what you don't have to and you'll be fine.\" It isn't that simple for us. We just don't make enough money to pay off all of our bills each month.\n\nBasically, I've gotten very sick recently. I've been out of work for nearly 5 months because I can't stand or walk on my own. We've been saving money where we can. I even got a buzz cut for the sake of saving water and shampoo (not to mention, I couldn't shower by myself). But despite our best efforts, we can't make it. My husband makes about $1,000 a month. Our rent cost us $650, our cell phones cost $70, and utilities usually cost about $70 (with internet). We still have to pay for gas and food. We've been sent to collections because of my medical bills and a credit card (which we haven't been using for nearly 3 years). We still have 7 months on our lease, and can't ask for any money from family, because I have already tapped them out. \n\nPlease, if anyone has any legitimate advice (no \"just be more careful with your money\" advice, please), I would love to hear from you. Anything helps.", "summary": "In deep shit with money because of collection agencies, and only one income between two people (because I'm sick). Need serious advice before we aren't able to keep our heads above water anymore."}
{"id": "t3_10360u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Mom can't accept me getting back with my cheating ex. [m&f 26]", "post": "So I've recently rekindled a relationship with my ex, M. We've been together for about five months now and things are great. The only problem is my mother. She refuses to see M and constantly says terrible things about him. \n\nWhen M and I were together before (only for a couple weeks) he hugged another girl. I was heartbroken. I was devastated. \n\nI was also 10. He \"cheated\" on me in fifth grade. 16 years ago. We'd never even kissed. I honestly think it's a funny story.\n\nMy mom says people never change, and says I'm being a hypocrite because I didn't support when my friend wanted to take back her cheating husband. She said that my situation is no different and I'm being naive.\n\nShe keeps going on about how people's personalities are set at age 6 and there's no way he could go from cheater to good person. It's put a real strain on our relationship because she brings it up every time we speak. Before this we had a good relationship and she's pretty much stayed out of my romantic life. I would have never dreamed she'd handle it this way.\n\nMy friends and other family are all supportive of my relationship. My dad is supportive, and apparently they've been arguing a lot about this. I just don't know how to deal with my mother.", "summary": "My current boyfriend \"cheated\" on me by hugging another girl when we were 10. My mom hates him for it."}
{"id": "t3_rgkj2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need advice on a strange situation..", "post": "So Im 20 yrs old and have been with my boyfriend for three years now. \n\nHe was my first, and I've never had sex with anyone but him. We enjoy a very active sex life with each other and are in love. In bed recently, dirty talk has consisted of him watching me get it for the first time from other men, and then refined to just this particular guy friend of mine.\n\nIts hot, but today he told me he actually would not only be okay withit but would WANT me to actually sleep with this guy... and i have plans to see him this coming weekend.\n\nWhat do i do? He says he would never expect me to be okay with him doing the same unless it was a threesome, that this would only be a one time thing, and that its only okay bc he knows about it. Also so if we were to get married he doesnt want me to regret never being with anyone else.\n\nHe says for him, he thinks I'm really hot wants me to record my friend and I so he can watch someone go crazy over my body and enjoy that part of me that no one else gets to. He watches porn often and says he wants me to make a video just for him.", "summary": "committed boyfriend wants me to sleep with my friend and record it, I'm worried itll ruin a great relationship and that one of us will regret it afterward."}
{"id": "t3_4wh0gu", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "High blood pressure at 26. Is this genetics or anxiety?", "post": "I'm 26, 63 inches, 110lbs. I run 2.5 miles about once a week, I have a desk job. \n\nI started monitoring my blood pressure since I got a 145/95 rate at the eye doctor. I am prone to white coat syndrome. Whenever I've had high blood pressure at the doctor, I've made that excuse.  But the eye doctor is an EASY one for me. Since I've been monitoring, my blood pressure has never been in the \"green\" range. I take readings at morning, midday, and night. I've been writing down everything I eat and drinking, looking at salt intake and caffeine. It isn't high.\n\nThis morning, right out of bed and before my coffee, 125/112. Wow. I did drink last night and eat salty snacks, but my god.\n\nIn general, I'm an anxious person. I've broken out in hives during interviews and if there isn't a way to order food from a place online instead of over the phone, I don't order. \n\nLately, I have a reason to be anxious. I'm currently facing moving to my boyfriend's home state 500 miles from here. I haven't told my work or my family about it, and I'm dreading breaking the news. I haven't had a good night of sleep in months.\n\nI have nightmares, cheek biting, tooth grinding almost every night. I'm tired all the time. I get headaches. I cry easily.\n\nSo, I guess my question is what do I go to the doctor looking to treat? Could I be genetically predisposed to have high blood pressure, or is the BP another symptom of my anxiety? I've never taken anything for anxiety because I'm afraid to. My mom was taking something years ago and she just wasn't the same person. I don't want to be that way.", "summary": "I'm a generally healthy weight, have a decent diet, maybe I could be more active. But that stress tho. What do we treat?"}
{"id": "t3_28dsy9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [22F] and I [28M] ended our 2 year relationship. She wants to stay friends but I'm still in love. How do I get over her so we can stay friends?", "post": "Two weeks ago my girlfriend of the last 2 years and I seperated. Since then we've been trying to stay friends but it's been difficult. She tells me that I am one of her best friends and that the only thing that's changed about her feelings towards me is that she no longer wants a relationship. She still cares about me and we talk all the time. We hang out every few days and have a lot of fun. But she insists that any romantic feelings are gone. \n\nI'm still in love with her and didn't want to break up. I've tried mercilessly to get her to give the relationship another shot, but she's adamant that those feelings are gone. She is one of my best friends and I don't want to lose her from my life just because I'm having a hard time accepting that it's over. This is my first long term relationship and it's my first big breakup. I don't know how I'm supposed to get over her. What are some things I can do to help me get over the relationship? How can I accept that she's not coming back and dull the feelings that I have for her enough that we can stay friends?", "summary": "Girlfriend and I seperated and we both want to be friends but I'm still in love. How do I get over her in order to save our friendship?"}
{"id": "t3_50x9hp", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "I think my (25F) fianc\u00e9 (24M) is depressed.", "post": "Hello. I've been here for a while but this is my first time posting because the situation is rather pressing.\n\nSince we moved in together I've noticed that he often looks like he just finished crying. When I ask him what's wrong he says it's nothing and that it's allergies. I let it go on his word but I know him. I can tell he was crying but I didn't know how to comfort him without making him feel embarrassed or angry.\n\nHe also has mood swings. He'll be the happiest man on earth one second and then he doesn't want anyone to talk to him. He loses his appetite and he becomes agitated.\n\nHe also can frighteningly easily throw people out of his life. A few years ago his cousin who he grew up with (they always called eachother brothers. I didn't even know they were cousins til we'd been dating for 2 years) told him that he wasn't his brother and my fianc\u00e9 hasn't talked to him since.\n\nHe does not forgive people. You cross him, he's done with you. Period.\n\nAll this I was able to kind of just, idk. Deal with (that probably isn't the right way to say it). But last night I woke up after noticing he wasn't in bed with me anymore. I found him on the balcony outside our bedroom silently weeping. Tears are streaming down his face and he could barely talk to me.\n\nI started crying and asked him what was wrong and he told me he didn't know.\n\nAfter he said that he hurried and wiped his tears and refused to talk about it. We went back to bed and today has been normal aside from that elephant in the room.\n\nIs this depression or something else? What can I do to help him?", "summary": "I caught fiance' weeping last night after multiple incidents of me catching him after he had been crying alone. He doesn't know what's wrong and refuses to talk about it. I think he is depressed and I want to help him."}
{"id": "t3_1fz1nw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[28/m] Protocol on my ex's stuff", "post": "My ex left me 8 months ago.  I'm over that, but whilst digging through my closet I found a bag of her clothes and toiletries.  We don't really talk anymore, she pretty much avoids talking to me as much as humanly possible, with the occasional \"I'm just calling to make sure you're not dead\" phone call.  She has a book of mine.  I just don't really know if the awkward returning of things is necessary.  I sort of feel like a dick if I just trashed the stuff, but she's never coming by to pick it up anyway.  I guess I'm looking for other peoples's experience with that sort of thing.", "summary": "I found a bag of my ex's stuff, she's been long gone.  What do I do with it?"}
{"id": "t3_d68id", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I need your advice! How do i get this prodigy recognized?", "post": "This may not be the best place to get advice on this, but there's this kid in town (19 y.o.) who is a phenomenal soccer player, to say the absolute least.\n\nI don't know his full background, but he came here from Liberia 4 years ago after a U.S. couple adopted him.  At age 15 he was already playing in Africa's 2nd division (not sure how soccer is set up there, but I know it was one step below the major teams).\n\nHe was brought here, to Small Town, USA where barely anyone knows anything about soccer. He was home-schooled so never got to play in high school but did play on a recreational club team for a bit. Now he plays in pick-up games once or twice a week with out-of-shape 30-40 year olds.  Needless to say, he runs circles around everyone.  It's almost sad seeing talent like that in such a talentless group. It's like seeing an orca at Sea World: It's cool to witness but you know that's not where it belongs.\n\nI'm not exaggerating when I say this kid could be playing for an MLS team right now.  He's so agile and fast and controls the ball with so much accuracy.  He can make the ball do whatever he wants.\n\nHe loves soccer more than anything but doesn't realize what he can do with it.  I told him he could play for a college team and he said, \"oh, I can't afford that.\" I was like, \"Dude! *The school* will pay for it.  *You're free*!\"\n\nHe doesn't have a GED yet so he probably wouldn't be able to play for the NCAA right away but he could go to a CC, or just go straight to a club.\n\nSo how do we get him recognized? Do I film him playing against these old guys?  Film him doing drills?  What do I do with the videos?\n\nThanks for any advice you can give!", "summary": "Kid who is freakishly good at soccer is wasting away in a small town in America.  How do I help him chase his dream?"}
{"id": "t3_bieka", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm beginning to think the telecoms are trying to use mobile internet service as a tool to destroy net neutrality...", "post": "Just thought I'd throw this out there and see what opinions arise out of it:\n\nOver the past decade our internet usage has been moving rapidly towards a model that utilizes mobility.  With the release of the iPad and the mainstream adoption of Android devices combined with the construction of nation wide 4G networks an ever increasing dependency on wireless data services is emerging.  My fear is that telcoms will separate this form of data transfer from hardline services such as cable or DSL and will clam that they aren't subject to the same rules concerning Net Neutrality.  I know this is bullshit, you know this is bullshit, but little Suzie must have her new iPhone and what does it matter if the telcom charges her just a little more for the internet service because \"that phone requires more bandwidth\"... it seems, they already do this as the N1 service through TMobile featuring \"Android Web Service\" is $20/month more expensive than the same plan featuring identical, unlimited web service.  Just the fact that they brand it \"Android Web Service\" raises a red flag for me.", "summary": "Telcoms may use public desire for new gadgetry combined with Cadillac data plan services for smartphones to end-around, and eventually attempt to destroy net neutrality.  Agree?"}
{"id": "t3_ktarq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, am I being too protective?", "post": "So my girlfriend and I have been friends for many years and just started \"dating\" a few months ago. Now that we're together I'm realizing how many other guy friends she has. I mean, it's ridiculous, I think she has like 3 close friends that are girls. It seems to me like she treats them the same as she treats me. It's to the point where we'll be hanging out and she'll get a call from a guy and go talk to him for half an hour on the phone. At lunch today she was asleep on the table (she didn't sleep well last night) and the guy on the other side of her decided to grab her and start tickling her right in front of me, and she just laughed as if that were totally normal. Now, I have a good friend (female) and my girlfriend doesn't like her cuz she's kind of a bitch, and a whore, and I honestly can't really disagree. So, I stopped talking to her, and basically all girls in general, because I know how it feels to me when she does that kinda stuff. It's really starting to get to me now. So here's my question: Am I in the wrong for thinking other guys should back off? I've been cheated on before by a girl and it killed me inside. I trust her enough to know that she wouldn't cheat, but I don't trust other guys as much. Am I being too protective?", "summary": "My girlfriend has a copious amount of guy friends, and it gets to me sometimes how many guys she has around her all the time. Am I being too protective?"}
{"id": "t3_ghgkp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Creating a comic & would appreciate your imagination!", "post": "Hello Reddit,\n\nMy best friend (a wonderful artist) and I (at best average writer) have been contemplating for a while, as a sort of hobby, to create our own comic. We understand it will take years to create anything worthy of being read but time is something we have! We've spent some time brainstorming ideas and such but unfortunately are lacking some inspiration. This is where you guys come in! We'd appreciate it if you could pick at your imagination and just suggest anything. Literally. Anything. We'd love to mix and match your many ideas together. \n\nWe'd be sure to keep you guys updated on the progress :)", "summary": "Starting a comic w/ my best friend. Would love if you could pick at your imagination and chuck whatever it conjures at us for inspiration as we brainstorm ideas."}
{"id": "t3_126o6e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(M19) My girlfriend (20) has kissed more than 30  guys including 2 girls. Including her sex life I feel  not very proud of having her, I really like her but  still think to break up.", "post": "My girlfriend(20) and I(19) are together for 2 months but I feel like I know her for 2 years. I really like her and I think im in love. She is really sweet and says that feels the same way about me. She stays at my place very often and some times even cooks for me. She would have been the perfect girlfriend except from this. We always say the truth between us and this is what I learned about her.\n\n* She regularly meets with her friends to party.\n* She lives in a very small town where everybody knows each other. \n* She has kissed 30-40 guys. Including a 30 year old.\n* Also has kissed 2 girls. Including lesbian sex with one of them.\n* She never had a real boyfriend. Just casual flirting/kissing and some times fucking.\n* Before me she never had regular sex. Only 10 times with 4 different guys in total.\n* But almost none of those times were in a bed.\n* She had sex in a park at night. (blowjob/sex).\n* In a car. On the floor. In the school....\n\nAll of this makes me feel really bad. I dont know which part is annoying me the most but it still does. I cant stop thinking about it and some times I feel like im dating \"bad\" girl.\nI am afraid going to her town, because every encountered male may have kissed/fucked her and that just kills me.\n\nWhat should I do? Should I break up? How can I forget this?\nI tried talking with her but I got nowhere. She says she cant change her past and thats true. Her excuse is that she is young and free and wants to try everything, if she likes someone why not kissing him.\nOf cource all of this was before me. Now she is all mine.\n\nNo idea what to do.", "summary": "She has kissed a lot of guys, had sex in public and with girls. I love her and she loves me but I still feel really bad inside. How can I overcome this?"}
{"id": "t3_4fc0tw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30 M] feel I should contact my ex [28 F] to apologize after 10 years apart.", "post": "Without getting too into it, I was kind of a dick to my ex while we were dating. It got real bad towards the end of the relationship to the point where she cut all contact with me and had her friends tell me things for her. \n\nThis was about 10 years ago give or take, and we've both moved on into our own serious relationships.\n\nI feel like I owe her a huge apology for being such an ass. The problem is that I don't want my current S.O. to know as I worry she'll freak out about it. \n\nI'm also not sure if there's even a point anymore, like my ex has most likely moved on and never thinks about me. \n\nI've been thinking about her more lately and even have had dreams of me talking and apologizing to her.", "summary": "Should I try to contact my ex of ~10 years to apologize? Should I tell my current S.O. about it? Am I just over reacting and need to focus on letting it go? "}
{"id": "t3_jxp4a", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Me: Seller on Amazon; Him: Person who doesn't understand that standard shipping isn't a magical teleporter to his door.", "post": "I've been selling old textbooks and the like on Amazon recently to get a little extra money.  Quite a few sold, and quickly.  One of these orders was made on a Saturday afternoon, August 20.  Though I offered expedited shipping as an option, this guy chose standard shipping.  I think, no problem, I'll ship all these books off (a handful of others sold that weekend too) Monday morning, and it'll be fine.  \n\nSince this guy asked for standard shipping, I used Media Mail, which promises delivery within (I think) 8 business days, well within the 14 business day limit Amazon uses.  I didn't get tracking, or delivery confirmation, however.  I know it's recommended, but I didn't figure there'd be too many problems, and I'd rather not spend an extra $5-10 that would be coming straight out of my pocket.  \n\nIn any case, I got a message from this guy today asking where his book was, it wasn't there yet and his class starts tomorrow.  I told him that I shipped it on Monday the 22nd, and Media Mail can take up to 8 business days, so it should be there by Wednesday.  At that point, this guy responds with \"Had I known you would be so slow I would have not ordered with you. If it does not arrive on time or all expect a complaint on your feedback I should have known your 97% ment (sic) something.\"  I calmly reminded him that it's only been five business days, and that I had offered expedited shipping.  I told him that I'd be happy to refund his money if it is not delivered within 14 business days, but that I don't know his schedule or when his classes start, and I shipped it out promptly and according to his directions.  I'm still worried though; if this guy does complain, is there anything I can do?", "summary": "Guy orders book via standard delivery, thinks it's instant, is mad when he finds out otherwise.  What can I do to keep his irrational anger from affecting my seller reputation?"}
{"id": "t3_3i4bkk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] and my potential BF [25M] are taking a \"break\" because of my age", "post": "So I met him about a month ago and we hit it off from the start. We hung out non stop for the first 3 week(4 night a week) and he told me he could really see a future with me.\nour only issue is he thinks I have some growing up to do. \n\nOne night last week we were laying in bed just talking and he says \"you are just too young for me\" and I said \"what do you mean\" he started explaining how I need to work and move out of my parents house.He works 40hr weeks so He feels like im a spoiled princess cause my parents are well off and they take care of me while im in college. Hearing him say that made me feel really bad about myself, as if I was a baby and that I wasnt good enough for him.\n\nThe next morning he dropped me off at home and I text him saying we should take a break until I get on my feet(which was a immature impulse decision on my part cause i really dint want to break things off) and He replied with just \"ok\". \n\nI really miss him like crazy and If becoming more independent is something i need to do to make things work i will. Its been about 5 days since we spoke and I just want to know if i should call\\text him saying i miss him or something cause I could really see myself being with him.", "summary": "broke things off with Potential bf because he called me spoiled and immature .want to know what i should say for him to consider taking me back."}
{"id": "t3_35mi1n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] with someone I've known online for a few years [16F] say we fell in love but are still in high school and have no way of seeing each other IRL...", "post": "I've known this girl (let's call her Jenn) for several years, originally met on a video game in 2011ish. We became really good friends, play video games together a lot, in skype/teamspeak a lot, video chats, have each others phone numbers and IRL info and the such, and both pretty much admitted our love for each other. I just feel really confused, confused because we live in completely different parts of the country, and since we're both in high school there'd be no way to move near each other for some reason (not that either of our parents has any reason to move). We've considered applying to the same colleges, but I don't know because there's always \"what if one of us doesn't get in\" and we really want to go there. I am just confused about what I should be doing. I have really strong feelings but I don't know what to do.", "summary": "Girl I've known online for years. Never met IRL. We love each other. Confused about what we should do as we can't move closer or do anything before we enter or leave college."}
{"id": "t3_23cuna", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24f] am having second thoughts about my relationship with [28m] together for 3months", "post": "I met X from an online dating site, I had just gotten out of a serious relationship and wasn't looking for anything super quick. \n\nAfter about 2 months of being no title etc we agreed to be \"offical\" which was great I really like X, but X is a tough love kind of guy. No romanace or cute little things are done, we don't go out and do things together like movies or date nights.  He always says we will but then something happens and we don't. (Example on my birthday he told me we would go to the science centre. The day of he said we didn't have enough time because he had to go feed the cats and shower before we went to my parents so we'd go shoot guns instead, which we didn't do either.) I've only met two of his friends, he doesn't invite me out with them it's always \"I need to see them first then I'll come over.\"  He has no intention of spending time with my friends.  \n\nBesides those things I do enjoy his company and I do like him but then Y [20m] has come along. Y texts me daily, interested in getting to know me, we have great conversations about anything and everything.  I find Y attractive, but I haven't spent any time with Y because I am faithful to X. Since Y has been around my emotions for X have been up and down. More so with his lack of speaking to me (he is a busy person but lately it's gone from a good portion of the day to a few words.) \n\nI am confused about how I feel. Is Y just a temptation? Is Y filling the void I have for X? Is X worth my time? \n\nSee this may seem like silly nonsense to you but I have not dated for 4 yrs so I feel like a high shool kid.", "summary": "I am dating someone I am interested in another but I like who I am dating he just lacks certain needs. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_geaxm", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Dealing with anger after two stupid breakups", "post": "Throwaway because they both use reddit. \n\nThis is a long story, and I apologize. Basically, I was with a guy for a bit over three years (August 2007-October 2010) and our relationship was excellent, but then he got offered an internship that meant that he had to move away for a year. We decided our relationship was so excellent that we would be able to handle long distance for a year. \n\nI moved apartments (we had lived together before - couldn't afford rent on my own), and became friends with this guy that lived across the hall. Over the next six months I steadily started falling for him, and realized I wasn't being \"emotionally faithful\" to the first guy anymore, so I ended it when he came home for Thanksgiving in October (we're Canadians).  \n\nIn December, I started dating the new guy that lived across the hall. Since we basically lived in the same apartment, we got to be together all the time and that was definitely fun...\n\nBut then, in February, my mom got diagnosed with cancer and I had to move home to help her out for a few months (Parents are divorced, I'm an only child).  My new guy decided that he would be okay with long distance, since I'd be moving back in May (hopefully). \n\nTwo weeks ago, he broke up with me because he wasn't feeling it anymore.\n\nThe problem is now that I'm just really angry with myself for throwing away my relationship with my old guy for this new one. Old guy was okay to hold on to me for a whole year when we were long-distance, but new guy couldn't even hold on for two more months. \n\nI guess I'm just really angry because I feel like I wasted my time, and for chose the wrong guy, and really just for a bunch of things. I know I should just chalk it up to \"life experience\" or whatever, but I'm having a hard time doing that. Advice for getting over myself? I know that it was wrong to drop old guy for new one, so I don't need to hear people berating me for that, thanks.  \n\nI'm F24, old guy was M24, new guy was M23.", "summary": "I dumped the guy I was with for 3+ years because long distance got too hard, only to get dumped by another guy because long distance was too hard for him, and now I feel like shit for dumping the first guy."}
{"id": "t3_1bu8au", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Have trouble trusting gf's [24f] actions vs words.", "post": "Hello everyone.  I'm [26m] having some trouble trusting my gf's [24f] words.\n\nBackground:\n\nWe've been together for one year, and throughout this time, we've struggled with her being \"too nice\" to guys who have been interested in her.  Guys will ask her to coffee or lunch and she'll assume it's friendly and go, until it doesn't turn friendly anymore.\n\nOne colleague, in particular, has been carpooling with her to work three times a week.  He's asked her to breakfast/coffee/lunch, and she's gone, glad to have met a friend.  When it went as far as dinner, that's when I put my foot down and asked her to think if this guy may have ulterior motives.  Since then, no problems.\n\nShe's gone as far to say that he's become annoying and is immature, will say things that are inappropriate at work (nothing sexual in nature, but just inappropriate office gossip) and how annoying she finds him.\n\nToday, she had an office party.  Her facebook updated and it shows her with this guy in multiple pictures, goofing off, her playing around with his tie, laughing, etc.\n\nI'm not jealous of him, but it's that when I listen to her complain about this guy, how annoying he is, how repulsive he is, and how she doesn't like this guy, and then I see pictures of her and him goofing off, it makes me sometimes question her words vs her actions.\n\nShould I even bring this up to her?", "summary": "girlfriend has a colleague she finds \"annoying\" and \"repulsive\" and yet acts very friendly with the guy.  Thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_39z7fl", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "23/f, how to win 20/m easily scared off, back?", "post": "I scared off this guy I got really into 2 months.\nHe told me he's never had a gf before, and has never really fallen for a girl before.\nHe seemed into me but I was cautious, we hung out a few times, then we kind of accidentally plowed (I didn't mean to, but for the first time I got super drunk because I was nervous) in the back seat of my car, and after being talked to by the police under the suspicion I was going to drive (I wasn't we just left out friends house to be in my car) he confessed he actually likes me and invited me over for cuddles. He would say how \"unfairly adorable\" he thinks I am. At a friend big party, he stayed by my side and kept offering me water. One of his best friends said he's never seen him like that with a girl before and how \"weird\" it was to see him like a girl.\nAfter a trip to LA with him and his buddies, him and I got drunk at a friends house, my friend was being negative and said she think he isn't that into me, and I cried to his friend asking \"is he even into meee??!1\" :( ugh. That night he had me over again to watch movies, but after that he didn't message me. People we didn't even know that well would get in our business and ask about us to his face, too.\nI messaged him saying sorry everyone got in our business, and he said \"we should just be friends.\"\nI still see him occasionally and it hurts really bad. If he was once interested in me, surely he can be again?", "summary": "scared off a guy by getting a bit clingy and weird, want to win him back or just get the opportunity to hang out with him alone again but he seems really turned off now."}
{"id": "t3_2necb4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend [24 F] kissed a close friend of hers and is unhappy with the consequences and is now taking it out on me [24 M]", "post": "Hey all,\n\nSome background: my girlfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for about a year now, dating for about 3 total. The distance has certainly been tough, and we tend to only see each other every couple months. \n\nThe story:\n\nWithin the last year, she had befriended one of her coworkers and they got pretty close. She's gone through a rough patch with some health stuff, etc, and he was basically who she relied on to help, since I couldn't be directly there. Recently though, when she was having a bad night, he came over and they ended up kissing. From what she's said, she immediately cut things off there and had him leave. Since then, he's quit their place of work and many of her coworkers have turned on her saying that she \"led him on\". They don't talk anymore so as far as I can tell, she thought of him as a friend and he thought of her as more than that.\n\nNow, she feels totally alienated and has lost a good friend. I'm honestly not even that upset with the kiss, since she immediately told me about it. What I'm struggling with is that now she seems to be taking her frustrations out on me. Last month when I visited, she was incredibly distant, and still really upset regarding losing a close friend and having work now be a tough environment. She basically avoided any and all physical contact, but has said that she still loves me and that things are ok. I've been as supportive as I possibly can be, and I think very understanding regarding the whole kissing another person situation. But honestly, I'm not sure how to handle this. Should I just continue to be as supportive as possible right now? I really love this girl and I don't want to come off as being needy or selfish. Thanks!", "summary": "Girlfriend kissed a close friend of hers, resulted in losing said friend and some others. Has been upset and seems to be taking it out on me."}
{"id": "t3_4v5jqn", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Dating is like the gauntlet.", "post": "This might be a bit ranty\nSo in hockey we have this practise called the gauntlet where everyone lines up on the boards. one person skates through everyone while they throw their hardest checks at you 20-30 people you have to go through. Dating is exactly the same way you go through so many different people all for the same result them trying to knock you on your ass. However when you get through everyone you realise you are on your own and it's your turn to deal out the punishment. Then your back at the front of the line going through everyone again. It just keeps repeating and repeating. Until you make it through without getting your ass knocked down. Sometimes you stand tall with someone and sometimes you don't. But you have to find a way to get back up at the end of the day.", "summary": "you get your ass knocked down, but you do the same as well. Sometimes you'll find someone sometimes you won't, But you have to get back up. "}
{"id": "t3_2ps6vc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 26(f) with ex 30(m). It's a horrible situation. I need help coping with not being jealous/upset.", "post": "Im not going to go into huge detail but basically, I dated this guy from work for a few months, all of a sudden he up and ends it. Citing reasons of \"he needs freedom\" and \"things got serious way too fast\". I actually do respect his reasons. He's going through a huge life change plus it's a busy time of year etc, and it's he was honest with me and told me fairly early on. He wants to be friends for now. \n\nUnfortunately I was further in with my feelings so I still hurt pretty bad (almost a week later) but I have to see this guy regularly at work and tonight I see he's gone out with all the work people, I'm not invited obviously. I understand. But it's making me spiral a bit. I miss him so much! I'm doing the whole no contact outside of work thing so we can be friends later (we were friends before) but it's so hard to see through mutual friends facebook etc pics of his gorgeous face having fun with people I normally hang with, and knowing he no longer cares for me in that way. It's soul crushing. I have zero confidence right now. \n\nI'm seeing my psychologist tomorrow to talk over how I feel but I guess I was wondering if there's anyone out here who can give me advice of how to shut my mind to it, how to move on. \n\nWith my ex's it's always been a bad breakup, so I've been ok hating them etc and could rationalise. It's so much harder here? I don't hate him. He's a wonderful guy who told me early on how sorry he was and how he thought he was ready but isn't. I can't hate him, but I just feel so unwanted it's painful. \n\nAnyone out there who can give me some advice or love?", "summary": "seeing guy at work, it ended amicably, but I hurt so bad seeing him all the time. Please help???"}
{"id": "t3_297r0p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (24) bf's(30) new-ish job causing strain on our sexual relationship.", "post": "*Background: we've been together for 3 1/2 years, lived together for 2. I have a promise ring and we are each other's longest, happiest relationship. On every other level, things are wonderful.*\n\nSo, basically my boyfriend got a job about a month and a half ago, and it's a pretty labor intensive job, with an early start. Our sex life has died waaay down since then and I'm having a hard time adjusting. It used to be an average of 2 or so times a week, with the odd oral session here and there. Pretty healthy for the most part. Anyways, since starting he's always quite tired. Reasonably so, I understand he has a physical job... But we're down to once a week, if I'm lucky. We've had sex/fooled around three times this month. We used to be like bunnies, but that of course slowed over time, but I was never unsatisfied. \n\nNow, the problem is, while I understand he's exhausted from working, I have a hard time not taking it personally. I feel rejected. I feel like he's not interested in sleeping with me. I know this isn't the case, but when you're turned down in a semi regular basis, it starts to get to you and eats at your confidence.\n\nI've told him how I feel and he always apologizes and reassures me that it's nothing to do with me, he's just too tired. But nothing has changed. I'm not sure what to do next. I've told him I wish he's just try once in a while, because even if he's not in the mood, he usually happily comes around once we get going (and vice versa). \n\nAnyways, if anyone has been in a similar situation, I'd love to know how you managed. Was there a compromise? And no, we won't have an open relationship. We are a monogamous couple and happily prefer it that way :)", "summary": "My boyfriend has a new job and is often too tired to fool around or have sex more than maybe once a week. I need more. What do we do?"}
{"id": "t3_27mvi3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO [22 M] works a lot and goes to school, doesn't have time for me [22 F]and I don't want him to give stuff up for me.", "post": "Aside from this, we don't really have any other problems.\n\nHe works 8 hours a day in a factory and also is a dancer at weekend nights. Besides, he goes to university (Product design. I study there too) and whatever little amount of free times he (we) get is spent studying or working on our designs.\nWe attend school at night and three times a week he also trains so seeing each other during weekdays is out of the question.\n\nWe also live with our respective parents, which limits even further the quality of our time together. We end up seeing each other maybe once every two weeks, and due to our family circumstances, get to have sex maybe once every three weeks.\n\nThis has come up several times already, and I don't want him to give up what he does because of me, because I know he will regret it later on. I don't work currently and even so, I have little free time as well, but I can make do and arrange my schedule to see him.\n\nYesterday he told me there was this cultural festival in our town, and he and his friends were scheduled to dance there. I am not invited to go with him. Said we could meet an hour before the festival for coffee, and I'd have to travel 1.5 hr each way to see him for an hour. I said I wasn't up for that since I have to study today, and that it made me sad that we could only see each other when he had a couple hours leftover from all his activities. \n\nSo here's the thing, I understand that the \"I don't have time\" situation is real, but it still makes me sad. He says he feels it as well and is tired of never being free, but that \"it will pass\". I know it won't pass unless he gives something up, but I don't want to be the reason he does.\n\nI am asking you here, reddit, not to tell me to break up with him, that option is already being considered. I just need advice on how to word this to him and work it out without directly and simply breaking up.", "summary": "My SO is so busy he doesn't have time to do almost anything with me, and I need help or ideas on how to work it out without making him feel he has to give things up for me."}
{"id": "t3_2wu9cu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Which should I choose (25f) when it comes to my career", "post": "I have been a Pharmacy tech for years now and still am in school, doing pre-med now. Got a new job that will cover ALL pharmacy school expenses and will give me a stable and well paying job as soon as done. Or I continue with pre-med and become an MD, which I feel like I will love more, but still requires years and years...\n\nWith both I am confident I will be good enough with studying, but one will be completely payed off and with the other I will need to take out a huge loan since I won't want to take away the time form my studies and work.", "summary": "Facing a hard decision about a career choice and I do not know which way to go, the easy one or the hard one that will possibly make me happier"}
{"id": "t3_1bgfs9", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Job fair coming up this week at my college. Do you have any tips?", "post": "I'm a second year student with a year and a half's work of experience in customer service and clerical work. My resume makes me look sort of like a job hopper from my previous three positions (4-5 months per job) because of unfortunate events, like a store I worked at closing and a sudden replacement at a place I was supposed to be employed at again for the upcoming season. \n\nAside from dressing to impress and a resume, what else should I be aware of? Or even protips for the little things, like what colors I should wear or how to wear my hair(I'm female)?  I went last year and snagged a few interviews somehow, but unfortunately I was unaware of family members already working for those companies/businesses, so I didn't get hired.", "summary": "Job fair coming up. I've been to it last year, and got a few interviews, but I would like to to better this year. Any tips or tricks?"}
{"id": "t3_lbjtt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Several of my friends at university are on track to have jobs at graduation or go to high level professional schools. What's your excuse, 99% people in college?", "post": "One is going to UNC pharm school, another will attend Hopkins medical school, one has a job in his field (statistics) practically in the bag after graduating. Yesterday, my friend got offered a job in I-banking and will make 6 figures out of college.\n\nI want to know, why is it that most of you cannot realize that if you are good at what you do, or show yourself to be in the upper echelon of students, you can get a great job and be wildly successful.\n\nDid any of you ever stop to think about how if you stopped complaining, took some classes that teach useful analytical skills (calculus, finance, organic chemistry e.g.) and did well in them, and made friends with professors and people at employer conventions at your school, you would have a great chance of being successful and having everything you want?\n\nIt seems like the self esteem generation is finally getting the message, \"Most of you are losers out of your own fault, and losers have never been successful,\" and they are in denial for the most part.\n\nI do realize there are extenuating circumstances (no college, although national merit scholars are offered boatloads of money, especially if they are low SES), but for the most part college students all seem to be victims of their own mediocrity.", "summary": "Most college grads who can't get jobs have no foresight or are just plain mediocre with no skills of any value."}
{"id": "t3_1pup1q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] Ex Girlfriend kicked Me [18 M] off a pre-paid cruise meant as a birthday present.", "post": "Throwaway because I don't know if the people I know, know that I reddit.\n\nOkay sort of backstory here, I dated a girl for a year and half and for my birthday in December we were planning on going on a Caribbean cruise with her parents. She ended up going to an out of state college at the beginning of September and she not only cheated on me, but said I was no longer allowed to go on the cruise, that was originally for my birthday, with her and her parents. The plane ticket to get to the cruise was a gift from her parents for my Graduation last June, and the cruise had already been paid for. Yet, I was still no longer allowed to go. I had talked to her Mom on whether she had even talked to her about it, and she hadn't talked to her prior to telling me I was kicked off. I even offered to reimburse her Mom for the plane ticket, but she insisted it was a gift that would go unused unfortunately.\n\nFast forward to now. I have a female friend I have known for over two years, and it occurred to her today that the cruise her and her family are going on just may be the same cruise I was supposed to go on. Aaaaand it is. She has talked to her parents about me going with them, and I have enough money for the cruise...but not for the plane ticket. Seeing as their daughter cheated on me and kicked me off a pre-paid for cruise/flight, would it be unreasonable for me to ask my ex's parents for my plane ticket?", "summary": "Ex and I were planning on going on a cruise in December with her parents, she cheated on me/kicked me off the cruise. Is it okay for me to ask my ex's parents for my plane ticket back."}
{"id": "t3_nxj66", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to stop this constant arguing?", "post": "Throwaway account here.\n\nI'm M (20) and she's F (20). We've been dating for about 4 months now, although we have been close friends for 3 years prior to dating. During these 4 months, we've had good times but we have noticed that we argue a lot. They're not usually arguments about big things but generally just many arguments about small things.\n\nFirstly, I admit that I am a person who is a bit quick to anger and I tend to get annoyed by small things. I am aware that this is a problem and have been consciously trying to correct such a bad trait. It's not at an extreme level where I get ticked off at everything, but things like when she decides to, for example, see her friends over seeing me after she has been away for a month sort of ticks me off.\n\nWe end up arguing over things like that and it happens way too frequently. I'd say we average an argument almost every week and I know it can't be healthy for our relationship. I really want to make things work between us but I really don't know how to approach it.\n\nI'm here, requesting advice on how to make everything better. I've grown tired of arguing over small things because I know it cannot be good. I do not mind if I have to do all the work and change myself so that I don't get annoyed so easily, as long as I know how to approach it. Please help.", "summary": "Me and gf constantly argue over small things. I am a person who gets ticked off easily. How to cut down on arguments?"}
{"id": "t3_2vmtsl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[18/F] My friend [18/F] has naked picture of my boyfriend [17/M]?", "post": "This is the weirdest situation ever so please bear with me. My friend was over earlier tonight and she was using my cell phone while I was making food. My cell phone has nudes of my boyfriend on it, I know it's stupid to do that so I don't need a lesson about it please. We've been together for over two years and we fully trust eachother and I'm never doing anything like it again. I had gave her permission to use my phone, she didn't just take it. But I hadn't thought about the pictures, she was just using it to go online on though so I didn't think much of it. I came back in the room and got my phone back and we just went on with our evening.\n\nBut about an hour after she leaves I got some email notifications on my phone, that was weird because I don't have my email set up on my phone in the email app. So I check it and she had left her email signed in, I saw messages from herself to herself, of pictures that was sent around the time she wouldve been using my phone. I know it's kind of snooping but I clicked on it, and she literally sent pictures of my boyfriend on my phone, to her own email. So she probably has them saved on her computer or something now.\n\nI have no idea how to confront her about it because it's the most awkward situation ever, but I have to say something. And I want to make sure she deletes those pictures. I don't even want to continue our friendship anymore if she doesn't. I feel completely betrayed and I think that was disrespectful to my boyfriend, me, our relationship, and our friendship. I haven't told my boyfriend yet as I'm sure he'll be mad at me, but I'll tell him after I resolve this. What can I do?! :(", "summary": "My friend was using my phone, she left her email signed in and I saw that she sent naked pictures of my boyfriend from my phone, to her email. So she probably had them saved on her own computer now. :/"}
{"id": "t3_4uoxso", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I friend guy[29M] who had a crush on me[21F] is dating someone else[30F], I'm hurt", "post": "I'm using a throwaway and sorry for my English\n\nI met this great guy a little under a year ago while i was traveling in France. When i went back to my home country we started talking on Skype and became great friends. We spent hours talking every day and he is sweet and amazing guy and we have exactly the same sense of humor.\n\nAfter a month he told me he liked me but i said i wanted to stay just friends because we lived in different countries and i knew it would end badly and also because he was older than me and i couldn't move to France because I still have many years of university left. We kept talking and became even closer. There were multiple times that he told me he wanted something more but every time i said i don't want to date him\n\nSo last weekend when we were talking he told me he has met a girl \"Jessica\" and they are maybe going to start dating. They slept together last weekend and its killing me. i have been crying the entire weekend. it's so stupid because i kept telling him i don't want to date him and he should find a nice french girl. Today we talked on the Skype and he could hear i was sad and tried to ask what was wrong and after a while asked whether the reason was Jessica. I just hung up the call and started sobbing and sent him a message saying i wish all the best to him and Jessica and after i sent it I deleted him from my contacts,. He has sent messages to me but i haven't replied\n\nNow I'm feeling terrible. I never thought i liked him so much until he ended up dating someone. But i know that it would be wrong to now start pursuing something because he is with someone else. He is a shy guy and isn't really great at meeting girls so i don't want to ruin it if he finally found a great girl (who is near to his age). but I just feel so terrible and sad and I need someone to tell me that I'm doing the right thing", "summary": "A friend who liked me started to date someone, i'm devastated but I know it would be wrong to pursue something now so I cut contact. Need someone to tell me I'm doing the right thing"}
{"id": "t3_22igkg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20 M] with my girlfriend [19F] for 2months..i need help.", "post": "I met a girl 2 months ago, and we talked for long time, 1 month after that we got into a relationship, she had told me all her secrets and that she had a boyfriend before and that she was a virgin, etc... 1 week ago we had unprotected sex, she was a virgin, but i was also a virgin. today i found out that she might still be with the other guy, and she might be playing me real good... my friends told me all this information about her cheating on me and stuff, but no proof what so ever. they went on and on for hours, i really dont know how to feel anymore, because, all the things they said, didnt match the way she is... honestly this girl is so kind, nice...she is everything to me, she just doesnt seem like the kind of person that would do something like that... but anyways, the question for you guys here is... should i still be with her? or what...\n\nbut more importantly is... if she did play me, will she allow herself to get pregnant, because if she does....my life is ruined :(...help me please!\n(her mom was talking to kicking her out of the house in a few months)\n(she told me she was under the birth control pill)", "summary": "my girl might be cheating on me, and we had unprotected sex, if she did play me, will she allow herself to get pregnant?, because if she does....my life is ruined :(...help me please!"}
{"id": "t3_1p8r41", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [20 F] for almost 2 years, have lived together for about a year and a half and she forgot a dinner date tonight and our anniversary in a week and a half.", "post": "To give some background my girlfriend has been working 38 hour weeks and she wasn't used to them before. Tonight I found out that she forgot a little dinner date and she forgot to ask off on our anniversary so she is going to work that whole day. The reason she is working so much is that she's taking a semester off from school and getting into the school's nursing program in the Spring.\n\nI understand she works a lot but I also work and go to school. I try to make time to take care of her needs and go the extra mile. I think of things we could do, places we could go, gifts I could get her and typical relationship stuff. \n\nI feel almost like the more emotionally aware of the two of us and feel like I'm not that important to her. She says I am and I can tell rifts between us affect her but she doesn't handle her reactions like me. I get that.\n\nI want her to want to go out of the way to do things for me. We have a very healthy and great day to day relationship most times. We talk things through and try to work out all the small kinks before they get bigger.\n\nThe thing is though, that I feel unless I do something or push for something it doesn't happen. \n\nI had to basically mediate and tie our relationship together with the way we argue, the way we communicate, and even sex. \n\nI don't really get suggestions from her on these things but she replies when I reach out. \n\nThe thing is though that I don't want to have to reach out all the time to get a response pinged back. I would like her to reach out to me as well. \n\nThis might not make sense, and honestly it's kind of a ramble, but does anyone understand or have experience with these things?", "summary": "Girlfriend forgetting a dinner date and our anniversary became apparent on the same night. I'm reading into it a bit and venting."}
{"id": "t3_3850za", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "thoughts on owner financing?", "post": "i have some land that needs to be sold. i paid 14 k for it . i had to pay in full, or have a foreclosure against my credit, which was not going to happen since i was planning on buying a house. \n\n*back story for those who care* me and an ex bought land, we were a week from getting married. i was on the papers too. this was back in 07, and we split right after from him getting cold feet. we got my name off of the land deed, but i had no idea that i had to also get my name off the bank . so i thought it was all him from then out (he did too) and we went our seperate ways. fast forward to 2 years ago, i get a notice (the first actually) threatening foreclosure becuase he had apparently not been paying it at all. i went to see what the deal was, and my credit had dropped to almost 500 because of it. i had less than a month , so i pulled my savings and bought it\n\nso, here i am  , still trying to sell this land that i want no part of,  and it seems like the only people that are interested are wanting to do owner financing. i'm leary about it, because its in a subdivision. if they have a house built, and stop paying me, then what happens? \n\nsorry this is long.", "summary": "had to buy land to get out of foreclosure, trying to sell but only people interested are asking if i will do owner financing."}
{"id": "t3_4x3psp", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I (25m) broke up with ex (23f) three years ago and I'm thinking of trying to rekindle.", "post": "We were together for two years in college and then we went separate ways since I wasn't ready to seriously commit. It was an agreed upon break up. We've now been apart for three years.\n\nWe live in different states now and we talk from time to time. She sends me messages saying that I should be where she is and that she misses me. I've been with other girls so it's not like I'm super lonely...maybe a little since all I do is hookup. I can't seem to commit to anyone else. \n\nWe've tried to meet up when I took a couple trips to her part of the country, but it's always a long drive and I'm doing other things. I was thinking about asking her to take a trip with me...wherever. What y'all think? Bad idea?", "summary": "I want to ask my ex whom I haven't seen in three years to take a trip with me to try and rekindle."}
{"id": "t3_1cinl2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F20] have found out a guy [M21] I went out with a few times and was going to get involved with used to watch child porn and bestiality.", "post": "We've only known each other that well a month but we got along very well, he was very chatty. The topic came up of what was the worst things we've done, he said he used to watch child porn a few years back and that he is still into bestiality. But he shows little remorse over it other than that it's an illegal thing. So I ended the relationship, but in the interim I had slept with him (before knowing). I didn't want to be judgmental, I wanted to think he could be redeemed and that so long as he wasn't directly harming anyone that it'd be okay, but it's not. I feel so much disgust now. \n\nI seem to keep finding guys like this, who tell me how they want to murder people or hurt people and all of this dark, dark stuff. I don't understand, most people tell me that I come off witty, funny and light-hearted. The only thing I can think of is that people tend to find me understanding and easy to get into an intense conversation with.", "summary": "I keep finding dark guys, and I want someone light. Is it normal for certain people to be secret keepers?"}
{"id": "t3_1ewo4g", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Tough decision, I need some advice reddit", "post": "I'm 20 years old and I need to make a decision about the next two years of my life. Within a week. I currently work for a bank that requires strict sales goals to meet. IF they aren't met three times (three months) you're canned. They pay me 10/hour and it's not unheard of to get a raise in 6ish months. The issue is, **I'm not a salesperson**. That's not my personality. I'm amazing at customer service, I have the most positive customer service \"reports\" done about me in the short time I've worked here. A coworker asked \"do you ask for people to fill these out? you have a ton\". That being said, I have a job opportunity at Chase Bank as a part time teller. What makes this decision so hard is that at my current job, I get 40 hours and Chase could only offer me 20 hours/week. Drive time to my current job is also 21 miles **one way** while Chase is literally 1.8 miles from my house, allowing me to go home for lunch. I do have an apartment and an awesome roommate that I know wont be late on his portion of rent, so paying bills with 20hours a week isn't the issue. It's the spending money and being broke all the time.\n\nI previously worked at Wal-Mart and took home just about 400 dollars every other week. So I know i can survive on this income. I just don't know whether I should go for Chase as I could definitely see myself having a career there. I'm a math major likely going to become an actuary, so Chase could provide excellent opportunities for me **eventually**.", "summary": "should I take a potentially better job that could take up to two years to pay off or my current job that pays twice as much that I dislike?"}
{"id": "t3_43fqlw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [21/M] like my coworker [23/F] who I see one time a month.", "post": "Frist of all I am shy and not very self-confident, but this is something I am working on right now and I have not been in a relationship ever before.\n \nLast year I worked 9 months at the Red Cross in Austria and saw her on one evening in this period of time. \nAs I ended working and started studying I started volunteering for the Red Cross one time a month (weekend shift) and I was surprised that she also works the same day in the month. \nAs I was working I heard, that she had been single since spring 2015. \nI basically saw her 10 times in 2015, but I really feel connected to her. \nOn Christmas I asked her out to play pool/billard with me sometime. She posponed it to a later date, because she had serious exams to do after the chistmas break. \nHence I have my exams now, I have not saw her neither asked her since then. \nThe last thing before I sleep and the first thing in the morning is that I think of her. \nI think I am overthinking the whole situation, how she will react and if I am her type of guy. \nWhat makes me think that is, that she is more the type of girl which is into sports and party on the weekends and I am the IT kind of guy and I use my free time playing video games. \nMy Question now is, how do I know if there is any chance, should I just say it straight forward, that I like her, when we meet up to play pool/billard, or should I try to tease a little bit and get to go slowly.", "summary": "I am shy, like my coworker, will meet her to play pool/billard, do not know how to proceed"}
{"id": "t3_1mp5kt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[23/M] with my \"friend\" [24F] 5 months, not worth continuing friendship if I am nothing but a shoulder to cry on?", "post": "Met a girl at a gaming meetup event and we started a friendship. We've done stuff together (play games and go see movies, meet for coffee) and I enjoy the friendship we've had up until now. I know she's developed feelings for me but I already told her I am only interested in a friendship and nothing else. \n\nHer marriage has been deteriorating and when we are together on an outing or online chatting she's slowly over time been confiding in me very personal stuff (which she should be discussing with her husband and not me). I understand people need to vent, but I get the feeling I'm becoming nothing more than a shoulder to cry on. It feels like emotional cheating, and morally I wouldn't infringe on anything like that. \n\nI already brought it up with her and she's using the pretext as a \"friend\" to continue to divulge personal things... Am I just better off cutting ties?", "summary": "Met a girl who I have had a good friendship with for 5 months. I like her as a friend and only want a friendship, nothing else. However, I get the feeling I'm nothing more than a shoulder to cry on."}
{"id": "t3_2ebogv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[20] and my good girlfriend[20]", "post": "Hello /relationships,\n\nI am a 20 years old, shy introvert boy and I have great ability to see what other people think,  mostly I can \"read\" people's feelings and their feels to others.\nI correctly guessd some duos in my old school (who likes whom), saw girls who like my friends and then put them together. I just see a lot.\n\nNow i am here with a problem. On grammar school I was attending, I found girl who liked me but I wasnt able to speak to her. She is as shy as I am, silent and she was in other classroom than me. We were just 2 or 3 hours a week together and with next 20 students. Now we both are attending high school and I can see her sometimes there and she me. We both are friends on FB but we arent writing too much. We even dont know each other much to keep our friendship there so long. Last time we were writing was before the school leaving exam, year and half ago. In school she always nicely smiles to me. I am sure she likes me and I like her.", "summary": "Can you please give me some advices how to talk with her and maybe get together? When could be the right time? What should I talk about?"}
{"id": "t3_2hal7z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend who is very sensitive/stubborn, how do I respond when she becomes upset/angered?", "post": "Best friend and I have known eachother about ten years, both 24 year old females. She is very sensitive to criticism, and does not handle it well. She does not get defensive but rather has a childish and irrational response when she feels she is being criticized or is offended. For example, she was upset with her current living situation so I asked why she hadn't considered moving somewhere else. Her response was that she was upset I never supported her decisions, I was mean and critical. I tried to tell her that I was trying to help, I didn't understand why she would continue to make herself unhappy when she could change it. She became more frustrated, calling me rude of names and the conversation got worse from there. \n\nI am very bad with social cues and my wording, I can be a little too blunt sometimes.  I am aware that sometimes I come off at rude, but if I upset someone I try to make it very clear that wasn't my intention. \nMy friend has not acted this way towards me till about a year ago. She had some health issues in the past but is alright now (maybe stress has something to do with this?). She works almost everyday, and doesn't take as good care of herself as she used to,  she's often sick or exhausted. \n\nWe've only fought a few times, but when we do I'm not sure how to handle her. She is very stubborn and will refuse to see another point of view. If I don't pick her side she tries to make me feel guilty, and will \"play victim \" to make me feel bad for her. When she gets in a fight she is manipulative, and will twist the other persons words to make her sound like the victim.", "summary": "Friend gets offended easily, acts stubborn and childish. How can I react in a way that won't anger her more, or help her see her see things more rationally?"}
{"id": "t3_4nrw6a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (24 F) move past a breakup that happened over a year ago and stop obsessing over him (36 M)", "post": "We had a very intense relationship that lasted about a year, although we only spent physically about 5 months together (long distance relationship, him in USA, me in UK). We mutually ended things because of distance and age difference, but I was utterly madly in love with him. Although I've given him plenty of space and allowed him to peacefully get on with his life (he's now in a new relationship and moved state and job, successfully forgetting about me) I've found myself completely unable to move on. Every guy I meet on a romantic level just doesn't compare and I don't feel passion for anything since our breakup, not even for my job or my travels or things that used to get me excited. I feel like I've lost a piece of myself and don't have a purpose anymore unless he's in it.\n\nHonestly we weren't even that compatible, we argued all the time, but there was a chemistry and romance there that I've yet to find again. It's obviously something that's just triggered in my head and turned into this unhealthy obsession that doesn't seem to want to die.\n\nI've spoken to friends about this and they've told me that time is the only cure, but it's been over a year and I'm still caught up on him. I so badly want to move on with my life and forget, but it seems so hopeless. Is there anything I can do to make this easier? Move on? Or even just force myself to see this person in a negative light?\n\nIt's a fragile subject for me so please be kind, and I know this is a topic that's likely repeated a lot. I'm simply hoping to get a perspective from strangers or people who have experienced something similar before I resort to any kind of therapy...", "summary": "Unable to move on after a breakup, feelings just as strong over a year later and I need advice as to how to forget."}
{"id": "t3_nnke5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Just out of a 4 year relationship - now have a new girl, but having troubles down below", "post": "Age: 23, Male.\n\nSo I just got out of a 4 year relationship two months ago (I have a 2 year old daughter with that girl). She cheated on me, thats how it ended.\n\nAnyways, I've been dating this girl for the past month who my best friend hooked me up with. We're really hitting it off, shes everything I could ask for and she genuinely has feels for me as I do to her.\n\nThe other night, its the first time we got into sex, and I don't know what is wrong with me. I'm extremely horny and all that, but for some reason, I had a lot of trouble getting 'it up'.\n\nI don't know if it was because I was nervous, because she's new to me, or what but it just hit me so strange because shes gorgeous and it felt right, but I just could not get it up right away.\n\nI kinda had to foreplay for a long while before I finally could, but I do not want this to happen next time :/ is there any tips you guys can offer or insights into the problem?\n\nSorry if this is not the right sub-reddit, I'm not familier with them all.", "summary": "Got out of a 4 year relationship, got a new girl now, finding trouble getting it up now and don't want to embarrass myself or make her feel like I'm not attracted to her. :/"}
{"id": "t3_2mueiz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "After many unhappy months, my [32M] wife [34F] has moved out of the house.", "post": "The past six months have been really bad. My wife and I were fighting a lot. I wasn't giving her the attention she needed. We fought a lot about a male friend of hers who I suspected did not have innocent intentions. \n\nA couple of weeks ago I found out she had a fake facebook account with a pseudonym. Turns out she has been using that as an outlet to chat with this guy for 3 months (she claims 3 months but I'll never know). \n\nShe says she did this because she knows I can easily check her phone messages and email messages. She claims that the two of them only chatted and never had a physical relationship. She claims it was all about receiving his compliments and friendly flirtations. So whatever, again, I will never know the truth. \n\nShe's now out of the house, and we occasionally text each other. I still care about her well being, but I'm very worried about myself. \n\nI'm so broken and tired all the time. I'm drinking too much, trying to cope. \n\nMy question to this wonderful community is this - What did you do to cope when bad stuff happened to you? I have work deadlines, important projects. How do I focus on myself, heal myself, and get back to doing good work. I have a major, major deadline Dec 15th, but I am not pulling myself up.", "summary": "Wife finally moved out, I'm worried about her, but I'm worried about myself, because I'm so broken inside and I'm not productive anymore. What techniques can I use to get feeling better?"}
{"id": "t3_3mmxci", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "American(25 m) fell for a German woman(20 f) while she was working in my city. Need advice on how to proceed next.", "post": "So as the title says I am an American man aged 25 and I fell for a beautiful German woman I met at my work. She was here working as an au pair. \n\nI work on a military base on the western coast of the USA in the recreation department and she would come to my facility a lot with the young boy she watched. We talked a lot and we became friends quickly. We spent some time together in and outside of my work and I developed feelings for her. \n\nI'm not the kind of guy to make a move too quickly and I also didn't want to scare her off. I could tell she had interest but was also being somewhat guarded because she knew she was leaving. \n\nAt the beginning on August she moved with the family to the eastern coast of the United States. Since then her and I text almost everyday and Skype at least once a week. We flirt and laugh and there is a lot of chemistry between us. I have developed some strong feelings for her and think she may have feelings for me too. I haven't said anything because I'm afraid of how she may react. \n\nThe job I work is a seasonal job and it ends at the beginning of November and starts again in March. My idea is to possibly move to the east coast for two and half months to spend time with her. I'm not going to flat out ask her to be my girlfriend or anything. I just want a chance to really get to know her and and see if this is real. That isn't going to happen with just texting and Skype. She goes back to Germany in March.\n\nSo my question for you all is: how should I approach her about my idea? Should I just tell her exactly how I feel? Should I ask her how she feels? Is it a bad idea altogether? How to tell her about this idea without coming off as a total creep/stalker? What would you do in my shoes? \n\nI'm crazy about this girl. She's like no one I've ever met and I feel like I have to at least try or I'll regret it forever. Thank you for reading my post. Any and all help and advice appreciated.", "summary": "Met a foreign woman in USA who now lives in a different state than me, how do/can I make this work?"}
{"id": "t3_msxfj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Please help! Gay man vs. US immigration. How do I go about this?", "post": "So I'm a 22 year old gay guy who lives in Ontario right now. I'm about to finish my last semester of school in December, and graduate with a B.Eng in Aerospace Engineering. I've been with my partner for 2+ years, spent months and months with him over summers/breaks, and I'm planning on moving to be with him come January. I haven't done a co-op job placement, and have no experience in engineering specifically (I've worked retail, crappy cash job at a grocery store, and a dirty factory line worker at Michelin). My partner is ALSO graduating with a B.Eng in Mechanical Engineering this December, but he's done a placement, and he has a job lined up in Kentucky (a -GREAT- job).\n\nMy issue : How do I get into the US/stay there to be with him? I know my degree qualifies me for certain Visas under NAFTA (I don't remember the specific Visas), but with the current economy and my lack of experience there's no one who will sponsor my employment as an international person. The job my partner has is restricted to a specific area, so it's not like I can just find a job anywhere in the US and go ahead and move there, and his job is absolutely amazing for a fresh grad, so there's no way we're passing on it.\n\nI think illegal immigrants are a bad thing, that's for sure, but if I \"visited\", and just stayed, I would only be doing so because I'm treated as less than anyone who is straight and doing the same thing I am. I WANT to go there as a legal citizen and live out my life and work like any straight couple, but I'm at a loss.", "summary": "I'm gay, my partner lives in the US, I live in Canada. Finding work (that will sponsor my citizenship) in a certain very specific area is nigh impossible. How do I go to be with him?"}
{"id": "t3_30rduk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] am in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend [20 F] of 6 months who is very attractive", "post": "I have been dating my current girlfriend for about 6 months but we were casually dating before for about 3 months. We both knew I was moving away to study for one year so we never decided to officially start dating. However I came home for thanksgiving after a month without seeing each other and she had asked if we could try to date long distance and I was all for it. \n\nThings had been going well, we skyped each other almost nightly and we saw each other at Christmas and she came to visit me at school a few weeks back. Everything seemed to be going ok until very recently when she started to act distant and almost secretive. I hear about her hanging out with guy friends and stories of men hitting on her a lot lately and I find it really difficult not to get jealous.  I have never been the jealous type but I find it so hard when it is long distance and because she is absolutely gorgeous. She is the most attractive woman I have ever been with and I know she could date many different guys who happen to live in the same city as her. \n\nI have not informed her of my jealousy or suspicions and I don't intend to, but I really care for her and I know how great things are when we are together. I am just unsure if there is anything I can do to ensure I don't lose her. \n\nI am going to see her in a few weeks again for one week, then we go three months (the longest time so far) without seeing one another and I fear that this could be the end of the relationship. \n\nBased on this I have a few questions for people out in R/ Relationships\n\n* Am I just being paranoid or should I be concerned?\n\n* How do you deal with jealousy when you can't be with your SO?\n\n* How do you deal with men hitting on your attractive girlfriends?\n\n* Is there anything I can do when I see her next to show her how much this relationship means to me, without acting clingy or jealous?", "summary": "Long distance relationship with beautiful girlfriend, she is acting distant, I am feeling jealous, worried this could be near its end."}
{"id": "t3_2463pc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my classmate/potential roommate [20M]. Found out some closer friends want me as a roommate, not sure how to go about letting the other guy down.", "post": "Hi all,\n\nAfter talking with a college classmate of mine about living situations, we went out searching for an apartment to live in. We didn't come to any solid conclusions, but we did narrow it down.\n\nProblem is, I have recently found out that a few friends of mine are in need of a roommate and want me to join them in apartment hunting.\n\nNothing is set in stone with my friends, but if it gets to the point where I need to let the original guy down, I'm not sure how to do it without hurting him.\n\nI'd like to have the talk with him as soon as possible, but I'm not sure how to do it without upsetting him. What is the best approach to this?", "summary": "Might need to ditch the guy I was supposed to get an apartment with for some other friends, dont want to hurt the original guys feelings. How do I manage without coming off as a total asshole?"}
{"id": "t3_2jtgxl", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by making a sexist joke in my women's lit class", "post": "I'm one of two guys in my women's lit class. I usually sit right in front of the other guy, and we're always cracking each other up by making (subtle) sexist **jokes.** (It's one of those in-the-moment things)\n\nAnyways, I'm out of it, having stayed up the whole night before. The professor is talking about the Presidential elections in a few years, how Hilary could be president, etc. etc. He then asks where we were when we found out that Obama was first elected president. A girl raises her hand and says \"I was in the kitchen with my family, we all started cheering\", or something like that.\n\nI turn around to my friend and whisper discretely, \"Of course she would be in the kitchen\".\n\nExcept it's not my friend. He's absent. IT'S THE FUCKING PRESIDENT OF THE WOMEN'S RIGHTS CLUB. She stands up and instantly shouts/announces that she'll be dropping the class because there are certain people in the class who are anti-women, and that she's disgusted that people like me exist. (while staring and pointing at me the whole time, I pretty much wanted to dissolve on the spot)", "summary": "I made a sexist joke to the president of the women's rights club, who proceeded to call me out in front of the class and storm out, now the whole class + professor thinks I'm against women in general."}
{"id": "t3_1lbg99", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[21M] have grown really close to my best friend [21F], who her roommate told me that she is not interested in me. Do I trust my guts and ask her out or trust her roommate?", "post": "Over the past month and a half, one of my best friends and I have become nearly inseparable. We've been seeing each other every day for at least the past two weeks, and when we are not together, we text and chat. Neither have taken the extra step to make this formally into a relationship, but I was planning to tell her my sincere feelings about her very soon. But before I can make that move, i thought I needed some consultation.\n\nThe girl I've fallen for and her roommate have been living together for three years and are the best of buddies. The roommate, however, did miss out on witness the beginning and the maturation of our budding relationship because she went abroad for most of the summer. Two weeks after she came back, I told the roommate in private during a party about my feelings for the friend, and she slapped me in the face, saying that my friend's not interested and that it's a bad idea. The roommate explained to me that my friend grew attached to me because she doesn't have a lot of friends (which is true) and because I was really the only one around her over the summer.\n\nI am confused because I am getting mixed signals inside my head. I would believe that the friend and her roommate talked about me in the two weeks both were together. But we have developed such a comfort level with each other that is expected of girlfriend and boyfriend. I don't know what to do. I don't know if it's worth it to ask my friend out when her closest confidant tells me the contrary.", "summary": "Became inseparable from my best friend, her roommate tells me that the friend is not interested in starting a relationship. I am left dazed and confused and unsure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2n8v9u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26m] with my pregnant wife [27f] or four years, I'm feeling guilty about my flirtatious urges", "post": "Ok, some background. She is 6 months pregnant, everything is going well on that front.  We are both happy to be parents and our professional lives are moving in positive directions.  Overall, we are happy together and only ever have small disagreements. We are very compatible on most levels. \n\nSexually she is slightly more controlling than I would like.  Only likes it certain ways, gets uncomfortable and upset with much experimentation.  We've talked about this but our relationship is more important.  With her pregnancy the sex has dropped off, but my libido isn't super high and I don't think that's an issue\n\nAfter a separation of a married couple we are close friends with, she confided in me that she had gotten drunk and made out with a work friend just before she had gotten pregnant (definitely not sex, definitely my baby) and had kept it from me.  She apologized profusely and I accepted it.  We even make jokes about it now (go make out with your other boyfriend, is that girl gonna be the one you make out with to even us out, etc.) though maybe we shouldn't? Maybe that makes it worse?\n\nRecently I've found myself wanting to flirt and make new connections with the opposite sex.  New friends through old ones, hanging out at the bar, playing games at a game store I go to, Facebook friends I haven't talked to much recently.  I don't really have sexual feelings towards anybody in particular, but I miss getting to know someone on more than a surface level. \n\nI want to get the validation of someone liking me and my sense of humor, but I don't want to cheat.  Is there any practical way to get that thrill of meeting someone new without being disrespectful of my marriage?", "summary": "My man lizard brain wants to cheat on my pregnant wife who made out with a work friend several months ago, I don't.  How do I satisfy lizard brain without hurting my marriage."}
{"id": "t3_48uz44", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (28F) got tired of waiting for BF (27M) to show up.", "post": "BG: So my boyfriend lives in an apartment building that's gated and you can't enter the building without one of those key passes.  As a result, I'm always waiting for him when I drive up.  Even when I give him a heads up that I'm five minutes away, I'll still be parked and waiting between 5 - 10 minutes for him to ride the elevator down so he can let me in.  We've been together 1.5 years.\n\nWe had plans for me to pick up Panera and for my daughter (5) and me to have dinner at his place.  He tells to let him know when to leave work (he typically gets off at 5:30) and I text him at 5:40 to let him know he should leave, since it takes 10 - 15 minutes to drive home.  No response, but whatever.  \n\nI pull up to the apartment at 5:50 and I let him know I'm parked.  15 minutes pass by and I text him that I hope he's on his way.  No response.  30 minutes pass by.  I'm still sitting in my car with a bag of food and a bored, hungry, five year old.  So I text him that I am leaving and do so.\n\nSo he calls five minutes later, while I'm driving away, apologizing about having been pulled into something for work and saying he is on his way home and wants me to turn around.  I'm halfway to my own place (as I live ten minutes away from him), so I say no.  We wouldn't be eating until seven at this rate if I turn around, so I tell him that I'm gonna eat at home, but he can pick up his food if he likes or eat at my house after he lets his dog out.\n\nHe refuses and then calls me stubborn and that I have no empathy because I don't turn around and now he doesn't want to have lunch with me tomorrow.  Did I handle it badly?  I wasn't really mad at him, I just wanted to get home, was tired of waiting and tired from work and want to put my kid who has school tomorrow to bed by eight and staying there would delay that.", "summary": "Waited for BF to get home and left after waiting for 30 minutes before he called and said he was on his way.  Am I a bitch for not turning around?"}
{"id": "t3_1smgwi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] feel like I'm messing something up with the girl I've been 'dating' [21 F] for roughly a week.", "post": "I've had one relationship in my life.  It started in high school, ended last year, and left me in the crap situation of having no idea what I'm doing in terms of dating someone who, as far as I can tell, is really great for me and nails everything I'm looking for in a partner.\n\nAs far as I can tell, she feels the same way about me.  We talk a lot, have a ton in common, and generally have a really great time when we're together.  We met online but live relatively close and plan to meet up next month.\n\nMy problem is that I know I'm being *way* too clingy.  I brought it up and she claims she doesn't mind, but I definitely feel distance and coldness when I'm talking to her while she's doing something else.  I also try to keep in touch with her all the time, exchanging texts when I'm at work or she's in class, and talking online when we're both at home.\n\nI feel like I'm being immature, or in this case very 'clingy', and normally I play piano or games or just browse Reddit/Youtube when I'm bored and not doing anything, but ever since I met her and things started getting somewhat serious, I can't focus on anything else other than \"oh shit what did i do why doesn't she want to talk to me now\".  Little pangs of jealousy kick in when she's doing something I can't do with her, but I know it's absolutely ridiculous to expect her attention constantly.\n\nI want to get this feeling out of my system before it starts becoming a serious problem.  I know she likes me and enjoys my company, but even still I know that too much of it is going to fracture the relationship before it gets high enough off the ground.", "summary": "Trying to avoid messing up with someone I really like, how can I get the 'clingyness' out of my system?"}
{"id": "t3_2rq0ok", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] uncomfortable with dating [29 F] who has active facebook, how about you?", "post": "I just started going out with this girl, we both just met each other too. \nI am a private guy, I like intimacy and privacy. However I just noticed this girl has a very active facebook, and it's making me very uncomfortable when I'm otherwise very secure of myself and confident around her when we're out together.\n\nShe has like 1k+ friends (compared to my sub-200 count, I hate fb.), and any posts she makes (boring/trivial to awesome news/photos) gets like 30 - 50 \"Likes\" , and they're all from dudes.\n\nI really like this girl and I guess I am starting to assume \"why I like her\"... what do you guys think? Should I continue pursuing?\n\nI'm posting and asking 'cause I wanna get a sense what 'is normal'... and I'm struggling if I should just ignore it and own the fact that the other thousand dudes can like her but I'm the one going home with her, or if I should quit it now since I'm looking for a serious long-term relationship and not a playdate.\n\nAlso, it's a 3-5 year \"interval\" between any single date I actually secure, I'm used to getting rejected. So now I'm actually super stoked and treasuring the fact that I have someone that is interested in spending time with me, which is making it even harder to decide what to do...", "summary": "Girl I just started dating has tons of dudes \"Liking\" her activity on facebook and is making me very uncomfortable, can't decide if I should quit now or ignore?"}
{"id": "t3_28rcyf", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Is it even worth pursuing anymore? (24/m)", "post": "So I met this young lady (f/22) at work. She was student teaching, and I am a temp aide who worked closely with the teacher she student taught for. Right away, we got along very well. Because I was in her class just  about every day, we had good conversations, usually joked back and forth, maybe borderline flirted. I was very attracted to her, but obviously had to be professional.\n\nI did some info digging (and by that I mean asked her what she did for fun) and no boyfriend was ever mentioned. I felt good about asking her out, but there was never time. Usually we were around at least one student, or another teacher, or the situation was chaotic and not convenient. Her placement ended but she came back to sub, as friendly as ever, but again there was no time to ask her.\n\nHer last day there, I thought I had a shot. I stopped by during her free period to talk. We were doing our usual small talk about job hunting, and I asked what she was doing that weekend, and she responded work (She had told me worked at Dicks Sporting Goods), and that she was closing that weekend. I was just about to pop the question to do something when she WASN'T working....and sure enough a kid walks in needing extra help!! And of course he stays there the whole period!!!!!\n\nI didn't have a chance after that. Now the school year's over, so she won't be back to sub, and I don't even know if I'll be back at the school next year. I've \"dropped by\" her store at times she would likely be working just to see was there, but she wasn't. (It's a big chain so there's multiple locations in our metro area). These places are about 15-30 minutes away and I can't keep chasing after her like that, lest I come off as desperate or a stalker, which I am not. \n\nShould I keep trying? Try something different? Give up completely? I have had **Horrible** luck with women and am getting frustrated at seeing what looks like a sure thing fade away, but I don't know if I should give up.", "summary": "Met girl through work, very good connection/chemistry, school year is over and am trying to figure out if I still have a chance by finding her at other job"}
{"id": "t3_1hnhft", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[24M] met this girl [23M] at a Physiotherapy clinic I go to. We have been talking for a few months. What do I do?", "post": "So as the title suggests, I met this girl at a Physiotherapy clinic I go to for my back. I go there around 3 times a week. We started talking there and sooner or later I added her onto fb (turns out, we have a few friends in common). So we end up talking for a while, like 4 months. I talk to her a LOT on fb and at the clinic, and we've chilled like once outside the clinic. We open up to eachother and start telling each other a lot of personal stuff. I would have asked her out sooner, but for health reasons, I wasnt able to go out too often. My health has gotten better though. \n\nBut lately, I've noticed that she is becoming a little bit distant, and doesnt talk as much as we used to. I end up initiating the conversation more and more often. In the past two weeks, Ive asked her to hang out, but she said she is busy. Whether she is bullshitting or not, I dont know. My friends say that I'm giving her wayyyy too much attention, and I agree. Im sure she knows that I have the hots for her. And as a result, I've have gotten friendzoned, or something similar, because when we do talk, she really likes to get into it. Hell, I asked her to chill today, and no dice.\n\nNow people are saying that I should stop talking to her for a week or so. Just to show that Im not dependant on her. Thing is, I would like to date her eventually, later on. Did I mess things up completely? or is it salvageable? Some tips or opinions would really help.", "summary": "Girl I met may be losing interest. Is there any way to turn it around? or should I pull the chute?"}
{"id": "t3_1plgl7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [21f] talk to my boyfriend [24m] about the extreme emotional/physical abuse I suffered as a child?", "post": "Basically some really awful stuff went down in my childhood and while it doesn't really affect me outwardly, it is sort of important to know and some things do kind of set me off. He has a vague idea, at least I think so becasue I've mentioned it in passing but I don't think he really understands because lately he's sort of been berating me for things that I'm afraid of that kind of stem from those issues or whatever but I don't think he really understands that. \n\nHow do I explain everything to him without making it sound like I'm looking for a pity party or without completely turning him off to me for being an emotionally high-maintenence mess with slight PTSD?", "summary": "How do I talk about my issues without sounding like a nutcase and making my boyfriend afraid he's sticking his dick in crazy?"}
{"id": "t3_2ile6h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (30/m) girlfriend (31/f) snooped through my email and is moving out", "post": "So my girlfriend asked me for the password to my computer. There isn't one, and I told her as much. \n\nApparently after she got done shopping, she got into my email and searched herself. She found some older gchats from a few months ago where I had talked to a couple of old friends about some fights we had. I didn't say anything derogatory, just explained what happened. These people live nowhere near us and are not in our current shared social circle, and very close to me and not judgmental, so I thought it would be ok to get things off my chest. I also had an email exchange from a while back when we had broken up and (subsequently) gotten back together with my mother, who was just saying it sounds like we just got in a fight, she really likes her, and if we get back together, she'd be happy.\n\nThis very much angered her, and she claims she can never look at those people without feeling shame. Right now she's apartment hunting.\n\nI guess my main question here is if I did anything that terrible. I understand her embarrassment, but it wasn't anything bad, just arguments, that I was talking about. And she's flat out told me she's complained to her friends about me. Friends we used to see often.\n\nThe other thing is that it took a bit of effort for her to find those. Even just searching her name, she had to go through a few hundred messages to find anything incriminating. It feels very violating, honestly.\n\nThanks for reading. I'd like honest feedback so I don't repeat the same mistakes. I don't know if the relationship is salvageable though.", "summary": "girlfriend found some older email exchanges of me talking about some fights. Now she's moving out. I feel like she was kind of out of line, especially since it wasn't anything too terrible."}
{"id": "t3_1huhsb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] am wrong and enraged by my [22 M] bf of 4 years", "post": "He is pretty much always right about everything and always proves it. It's very frustrating. A third of the time, things just turn into arguments, and he always wins. I am enraged. \n\nIf it matters, the most recent fight was about lyrics to a popular song and we both looked up the lyrics and he turned up to right. again. surprise. I am pissed off about it since it's happened several times and I can't just be right once. Is it too much to ask for him to at least let me feel right once or twice?\n\nI can't be immature and lash out at him for being right, but I can't stand to keep being wrong and to keep feeling like shit for always being wrong and getting upset about it. I am too angry to sleep. \n\nAdvice?", "summary": "I am mad about always being wrong in my bf's \"quiz games\" and don't know exactly how to approach the issue."}
{"id": "t3_2oxyhe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my girlfriend [23 F]. She lied about keeping in contact with her ex", "post": "When my girlfriend and I started dating 7 months ago, she mentioned she had a crazy stalker ex who was still crazy over her and would call/text her once in a while although she said she wouldn't reciprocate. I didn't think much of it.\n\nThis past weekend she told me that this guy tried calling her saying he would try to break up our relationship. When I asked her the reasons why he would want to do that, she was not straightforward with me and I felt something was up.\n\nSo I found the number of the other guy and called him up. Surprisingly, he said years ago she used to be madly in love him and went pscyho trying to ruin his life and trying to break up his relationships. He also said that on the friday before the weekend, she texted him asking to give her and a friend a ride from the bar. Furthermore, he said that they do text each other in a while.\n\nWhen I confronted my girlfriend about all this, she confessed and said everything was true. But she said the only reason she talked to him was to keep tabs as he used to be a big part of her life. As for the reason for asking for a ride, she said she was just drunk with her friend and needed  a ride home (I don't have a car). \n\nShe said she didn't want to tell me about the truth because she didn't want me to get upset. But why did she lie and tell me he's a crazy stalker when in truth she was reciprocating? Also I was shocked she asked him for a ride while she was really drunk. She never told me any of this.\n\nIn all honesty, I don't think she had the intention of cheating, but I just think she doesn't want to let go of the past. She still says she loves me and would never want him over me, which I believe.\n\nWhat scares me most is how she lied about the whole situation. I feel like my trust for her has been severely violated and I don't know how to move forward. Is this something I should forgive? Or are these signs that she might do something like this in the future and I should get out while I can?", "summary": "Girlfriend lied to me about keeping in contact with an ex, who she claimed was stalking/harassing her. Truth is she was also keeping tabs on him too."}
{"id": "t3_10nbbm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Oh hey Reddit, I'm getting screwed over (royally) by my roommate, anything I can do to screw him over?", "post": "Back Story\n\nI found my roommate randomly, and moved in quickly. No sublease was signed (stupid I know, but I was desperate) and things have slowly deteriorated. He's super messy, things are leaking, and just plain dirty living conditions. To top it all off, because my roommate and landlord have \"bad blood\" he hasn't be paying rent. This only came to light for me because the Marshall came and took the apartment for 24hours. So, I had been paying him, and he probably was spending it on hookers and blackjack. After the lack of rent paying came about, I informed him that I would no longer be paying him directly, and wanted to pay the landlord instead. Anger flared (on his part, I think it's a legit request), and he told me to be out of the room by Oct 2nd. Thankfully I have a supportive SO who will let me live with him temporally (and NO, it is not an option to live with him permanently), but I'm stuck trying to find a mover for Oct. 1st. and a new roommate situation ASAP. All while working and going to school full time. First world problems, I know. \n\nSo Reddit, whats a clandestine and classy way (AKA not illegal) to screw him over?", "summary": "My roommate doesn't like to pay rent so I am being forced to relocate and really want to send him a nice FUCK YOU."}
{"id": "t3_3xk79g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] found out my girlfriend [18 F] sexually cheated on me and ended it. I feel terrible.", "post": "Every time i brought her ex up she told me a little more. Finally, tonight, she admitted to fooling around with him multiple times while we were dating.\n\nI feel terrible. I ended it and I know she's devastated. It hurt me saying goodbye. I feel dirty. I feel like I lived a lie for such a long time. \n\nOn top of all of this (i can't explain it and i know it makes no sense) but if anyone finds out that her and I were talking tonight, i can be fired. I work at a church and made a commitment to be single for a year to grow as a single man. I know it sounds crazy, please don't dwell on this portion. \n\nI have the option of telling my uplink that I broke my commitment to the church and come clean with a chance of being fired on the spot. I don't know what's worse. Living with the guilt and fear of getting found out... or telling them and coming clean with a chance of getting fired too.", "summary": "Girlfriend cheated. I ended it. I feel terrible. I could be fired. How do I move on and not feel bad for her?"}
{"id": "t3_3azz1f", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU : Not meeting her needs", "post": "I should start off by saying, she broke up with me (over snapchat >.< ) 3 days ago..\n\nSo, firstly I don't have the confidence that many of you have.. As a gamer and not really much more, being with a girl as cute and funny (insert more compliments that makes me miss her ) was apsolutely amazing. But, a month has passed and I hadn't even kissed her.. We'd joke about it and how I was being a pussy but I couldn't do it.\n\nAfter ignoring me for 2 days (I didn't spam, as I figured I'd done something wrong.. Still asked if she was ok) I got a snapchat message saying that it just isn't working and we shouldn't go out anymore. \n\nIf only I had that confidence, I really liked her too.", "summary": "didn't kiss my girlfriend for a month, she broke up with me on snapchat >..< (still can't get over that. So funny) "}
{"id": "t3_1pqzkw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] just broke up with my GF of 6 months [21/F] because the reasons of her past. Did I did the right thing? [more details inside]", "post": "We were very much in love for past 6 months. We practically lived together (she slept over at least 5 days per week), we had some travels, meet the family and everything that makes a real relationship. I knew she had at least 10 boyfriends before me, 2 of them were serious relationships of 1 and 2 years. She cheated her ex boyfriend of 1 year with some guy. After she finished having sex with him she will call her boyfriend and say how much she love him and miss him. I was disguised with that and thinking \"OK, at least she broke up with him and 15 days later she started dating me and we are doing fine\".\n\nWell, last night she forgot to log off from facebook and I wanted to see if she is still in touch with the guy she was having sex. She is not in contact (at least not on facebook) but she is visiting his profile. The thing that disguised me is what she told her sister about whole cheating: She was with her boyfriend brother wedding, got into fight with BF and left wedding and gone by herself to the bars. After a while she stumble upon on guy she was cheating with and gone into back alley and had sex in street. She described how good he was fucking her that night at street. I almost throw up.\n\nI want a princess, not a whore. I need a serious GF. I can't get that image out of my head. I broke up with her and told her everything. She has no regrets and shame for that night for fucking him on streets.\n\nDid I did a right thing?\n\nSorry for my poor English.", "summary": "I found out my GF fucked some guy in back alley 15 days before we started dating so I broke up with her."}
{"id": "t3_ezuy0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What would you do if you were paralyzed tomorrow?", "post": "I was doing some volunteer work for a hospital and met a guy named Connor.  He's 22 and is awesome.\nI was wondering what you would do if you were in his shoes:\n\nAbbreviated Transcript:\n>\"Before my accident I was going to college at RIT in upstate New York.\n>Was going into my senior year.\n>Worked at a restaurant over the summer.\n>I was at a coworker party at a camp.  Dove off a dock with a few of my buddies. \n>There was a rock right below the surface.  Cut the top of my head just right on the rock and couldn't move from the neck down.\n>They pulled me out after I passed out facedown in the water.  Got me to the hospital and then got helicoptered to a couple others.\n>But um, I'm here.\"\n\n>\"Long time, though - I want to be able to walk again.\"\n\nMore information: I've worked with Connor and he's amazingly upbeat.  I've had this video for over a year now and haven't really known what to do with it.  It was just an impromptu mini interview.\nI can't imagine being as upbeat after becoming a quad as he is.  \n\nSide note: I found out today he got kicked from his insurance.", "summary": "What would you do if you go paralyzed from the neck down tomorrow?  The kid above was, but he's a total badass about it. Smiles when talking about getting better."}
{"id": "t3_3mglg6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "M 35, married for 7 years. My wife is having all sorts of male friendships and getting further and further from a joint social life with me. I'm cool with her having her own life but when should I start feeling sleighted?", "post": "I trust her.  But we spend zero time together anymore. She spends more time at a bar with dudes I don't even know, coming home late, and keeping me up all night.  At best when we spend time together, she sits on the couch texting friends.  Last night we had a fight and she left at midnight until 2 am to go drinking when the kids have to get up at 7 am for soccer.  I would love to have a life like that but don't have time to meet anyone because all I do I work, so my social life is her...and she wants no part of it.  I just go to work to pay for the family, then get ignored by her.  It's really really depressing.", "summary": "guess if I was included in the social circle it wouldn't faze me at all but she doesnt want me a part of it...idk... "}
{"id": "t3_12i0ro", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [24f] seeing my ex-boyfriend [27m], would I seem desperate and pathetic if I looked hot?", "post": "I dated this guy for 2 months, and he broke up with me. I'm meeting him soon to get my stuff back and I was just wondering how I should dress.\n\nI told him I would meet him after a meeting, so should I just show up in slacks and a nice shirt? I originally wanted to wear a hot dress and make him drool but I just realized how pathetic it might seem. I was going to tell him I was headed to the bar to relax - that's why I look so sexy - but I'm sure he could see right through it. Yet I don't want to look like a total square and wear nice clothes, you know? But I feel like he'll be expecting me to look hot for him, and I don't want them.\n\nSo professional or hot?", "summary": "I'm seeing an ex, don't know whether I should dress hot or conservative, lest I seem desperate. Thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_54hmqc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [19/m] dont know if i should keep my distance with my friend [20/f] since i feel she is developing feelings towards me.", "post": "Ok so to better explain, I have this friend that is somewhat of a bestie to me, she has been really affectionate to me and only me in our group of friends. \n\nIn the past couple of weeks she and her bf have been having a lot of fights that were really intense for what she told me (and for how obvious her sadness was) to the point of breaking up for a couple of days. I didn't want to butt in (I've known her for a couple months now) so I just told her to think wisely, and she decided to give him one last chance, and I understood since they've been together for 3 years.\n\nNowadays we've been chatting and getting really close to each other day by day in and out of college and I legit don't know what to do or not to do now. I've been trying to not develop serious feelings towards her and I also noticed she is trying to do the same. I don't know her bf personally so no friend backstabbing there.\n\nI just don't want to ruin our friendship since I've done that with most of the few girl-friends I've know in my life. She has told me that I'm attractive but don't want me to find a gf since she wouldn't be able to be as loving to me as now, that tipped me off. Also she has had a lot of boyfriends (and 1 girlfriend) and I'm still sitting at 0 so I haven't got the slightest clue of what I'm to do.\n\nJust please, don't let me fuck this up with her, I really like her, she is smart, funny, an awesome person overall. I just don't want history to repeat itself.", "summary": "A friend of mine is being too loving towards me and she has a bf, i don't know what course of action i should take."}
{"id": "t3_2gxgcj", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I'm a bisexual female [21f] unsure weather to make contact with a girl [23f] I met 3 months ago", "post": "I'm bisexual but not out to many and I have never been with a girl, although I have wanted to for a long time. At a festival I volunteered at 3 months ago I was put on shift with a girl I'll call Hannah. Me and Hannah spent a lot of time together on shift and using her sharp gaydar I'm pretty sure she began to suspect I liked girls, so she dropped a few hints that she was gay and then made a few passes at me. I was too shy to reciprocate, especially because at that point I wasn't out to the people I attended the festival with, who me and Hannah were also working with. I stupidly left my last shift without her number and never saw her again. So today while scrolling through the volunteer group Facebook page I found a post by someone that looked a lot like her had made about a week ago, and it did turn out to be Hannah. (Not that I've been looking for her for the last 3 months, or anything.) Would it be weird to add her on Facebook and try and talk to her, or has it been too long? I feel pretty stupid for still thinking this over this 3 months later and I'm worried that I might come across as really creepy. I know this seems really trivial, but I would love for my first experience with a girl to be with her.", "summary": "Met a lesbian at a festival who was coming on to me and was too shy about my sexuality to let anything happen, not sure weather to message her 3 months later."}
{"id": "t3_3enycf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being too honest", "post": "OK this happened yesterday and I am only posting it because my fiance does not have a Reddit account (I am working on it, she is subscribed to Mandatory so yeah, baby steps) and I have \"*explicit permission*\" from said fiance to post this in her first person, as it was told to me. So I hope you enjoy this as much as I did.\n\nI walked in the back to clock in, and after I did, I realize there was money on the ground  - 2 dollars but still, not my money and $2 is still $2. I ask everyone in the back if they had seen anyone come in recently as I had not seen the money on the floor as I went in to clock in, I saw it *after*.\n\nI must have asked 30 people - \"is this *your* money?\" - finally I decided to go turn it into the manager's office in case anyone lost it. I go in, give the $2 to one of the assistant managers and told her I had asked almost everyone if it was theirs and everyone said no & even if it was just 2 bucks I couldn't keep it because it wasn't my money.\n\nI turn and walk out of the office. About 6 feet down the hallway it hits me: I had just come off break (where I had walked over to the nearby Subway and had a combo meal) and *that was *MY* $2 I had gotten back as change from my sammich!!! I had just turned in *my own money* to the lost and found after pretty loudly stating that it wasn't MY money and \"if it were me, I would hope someone would turn it in\"...\n\nI didn't go back. I will never tell them that was my 2 dollars.  At least it wasn't a *too costly* lesson. I also realized how honest my co-workers are :)", "summary": "Found money, looked for money's owner frantically, turn money into the office, after leaving office realize the money was actually mine. Can't go back because shame, yall."}
{"id": "t3_qkitb", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Advice on upcoming Half Marathon: to run, or not to run?", "post": "I should really say run/walk, I am no where near advanced enough to simply \"run\".\n\nI'll try to stick to the \"need to knows\" and keep this short-ish...\n\nI trained last fall for a half marathon, I ended up not run/walking in the official marathon(financial issues) so instead went to a park where I normally do my thing, I ran/walked the 13.1 miles on my own(my time was 3:11:17). That was in October. November I barely ran (maybe 10 days total, including a 10k, but most of the other runs were 1.5-3 miles). I did not run at all in December or January, and I started running 2-4 days a week mid way through February and have been consistent with that up until last week when I dropped the ball(kind of messy break up).\nSo I haven't ran any more that 3 miles since November, and am feeling really unprepared for this half marathon I am signed up for on March 11th. I have a friend who is amazingly supportive and wants me to go for it, but I just feel I am going to make a fool of myself(we have a 4 hour time limit) or worse, end up hurting myself. \nI know only I know my own body in the end, but with the information at hand, any advice, opinions would be greatly appreciated. I am teetering in the middle so I thought some advice from strangers that know something about running might be able to help.", "summary": "unsure if I am ready for an upcoming half marathon, not sure if I should stick it out, or jump ship and better prepare for the next one. "}
{"id": "t3_1ozjsh", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Need a family lawyer's advice....", "post": "I posted this 5 months ago hoping to get advice in a few subs:\n\n>I'm a 15 going on 16 year old and I have 3 siblings; 13 year old sister, 12 year old brother and a 6 year old brother. Yesterday our parents sat the three oldest of us down and told us they had filed for divorce. I'm not really bothered by it since I saw it coming. My real problem is I don't want to go anywhere my siblings go.\n\n>I don't have a good relationship with my family. My mum and dad >haven't gotten along for years and have always taken their frustration out on me. They didn't want to parent us and wanted me to step up and take care of my siblings.\n\n>My siblings and I hate each other. My brother thinks its funny to wreck my stuff and steal my savings (summer jobs). My sister steals my stuff and is physically abusive (hits and scratches me). If I retaliate I get slapped and if I try to take my stuff back I get yelled at because \"I'm the older sibling and should be the bigger person\". The 6 year old is alright since he hasn't picked up any bad habits from those two and I wouldn't mind him staying with me.\n\n>When my parents split I want to be away from them, I want to be in the custody of the person who doesn't have their custody. I wouldn't mind going to foster homes if it comes to that, I reckon it'll be better than having those two constantly ruin my days. I don't really want to meet them either if my non-custodial parent gets visiting rights.\n\n>I don't know if I'll get asked for my preference when my custody is decided. I talked to me school counselor and she said she didn't know much about it (haven't had any kid come to her with that problem) but said she'd expect the judge to get that sorted. I don't really want to choose between my mum and dad, I just want my brother and sister to not be with me.\n\n>How do I tell the judge this if he asks me? I really want him to take me seriously on this. Thanks for reading.\n\n>", "summary": "Parents have filed for divorce, I prefer my brother and sister to be with one parent, and me with the other."}
{"id": "t3_bgx2f", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Relationship questions (sexuality involved)", "post": "So I've liked men for a few years now, but I've never been in a relationship with a guy, as I live in a very non-gay area. I'm in a position to start a relationship with a girl, but I'm not sure I want to be in a committed relationship yet.\n\nThe reason why I'm confused is because I could see myself in a longterm relationship with the girl in question, but I feel like if I start something with her I will miss the opportunity to find a guy while in college (september). My sexuality is a large part of my psyche and personality, and discovering that I liked men was an important moment in my life. I don't mean to be melodramatic, but I really want to experience homosexual culture while I have the chance.\n\nI know I'm being ridiculous about the timing and I know I'll still have chances to be gay, but I really think that I could end up marrying the girl. She has liked me for a long time, we are very similar, she wants to go to the same school as me, and even her mother has brought up the fact that we should get married (albeit somewhat jokingly) in conversation a few times now.\n\nAnyways, I'm rambling but I just don't know what to do.", "summary": "I don't want miss out on what could potentially be a great relationship but I also don't want to get into a committed relationship and miss the opportunity to be gay. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_kp8fu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My experience with city cops today, what do you think?", "post": "Context: I go to a large state school which is pretty much integrated into a major city.  I am brown skinned (Indian). \n\nToday, I was just sitting at a bench near a bus stop eating a fig newton with my backpack next to me, alone. A city cop comes up to me and starts asking me questions about what I'm doing and stuff. I tell him I'm just sitting here eating breakfast before going to class. He asks me to empty my pockets and show him my ID. I'm not really too worried, and I have nothing to hide, so I show him my college ID and the contents of my pockets. In my pocket I had my wallet, phone, car keys and a small (3in) pocket knife with a bottle opener on the back. He takes the knife and asks me why I have it, I tell him that I have it for the bottle opener and opening boxes (part time job at a warehouse). He tells me to sit down, puts all my stuff on the bench away from me and calls for back up. He clearly states onto the radio that I am armed and dangerous. Two more cops show up in like 30 seconds, one male and one female. The first cop has me stand up and put my hands behind my head and him and the other cop start patting me down. The female cop starts going through my backpack, and finds (surprise) 2 text books, a laptop and a notebook. At this point, my class starts in about 5 minutes, I tell them I gotta go to class and they tell me that they still need me. The first cop starts asking me a bunch of random questions about my family and where I went to high school. And now the female cop is going through my wallet, she finds my military ID and shows it to the other 2 cops, who just realized that I am a Marne. They pretty much immediately let me go, and the first cop apologized to me for wasting my time. \n\nWhat does Reddit make of this?", "summary": "Im brown, eating breakfast, cop thinks im a terrorist and starts searching my shit, calls for more cops, they let me go once they look through my wallet and find my military ID."}
{"id": "t3_jdtrc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can we deal with the looters in England?", "post": "The people that are looting cities across England aren't standing up for any cause, there has been no injustice done to them, yet they feel dissatisfied with the government and take this out on small business owners and retail chains who are not the root of the problem. Some of these people (gang members and criminals aside) justify it by saying that they have been wronged by society, the police, the government. How do you deal with people like this? If you whack them, you just increase the feeling of resentment whilst pacifying them for a while, and if you pander to them and try to placate them, they just feel more entitled to do the same thing again like a spoiled child.", "summary": "How do you deal with rioters/looters when they resent you if you pacify them, and feel entitled to rob small businesses and burn buildings?"}
{"id": "t3_35t1ny", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Background check at consulting firm.", "post": "I was just offered a job at one the larger consulting firms in the US. They are currently doing a background check. 5 years ago I got a misdemeanor for possession of marijuana that was reduced to possession of paraphernalia. Haven't had any other legal issues and can pass a drug test if given one.\n\nBasically, my question is, how likely is it they will rescind the contract offer? During the application I filled out a background check form and was honest and upfront about everything. Am I freaking out over nothing or am I right to worry that my stupid mistake from 5 years ago will come back and haunt me?", "summary": "Misdemeanor charge for paraphernalia from 5 years ago. Got a job offer at large consulting firm and they are doing background check. Should I be worried I lose the job?"}
{"id": "t3_4dfr2k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my girlfriend[21 F] of 5 years, I feel exhausted in our relationship. Is this relationship saveable?", "post": "I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years. Our relationship has always been me giving my 100% all the time. I feel like I am constantly needing to do something to keep her happy. Whenever she gets in a bad mood for no reason, I stress out over how I can help. The problem is that nothing I ever do seems to help. \n\nWe have talked about this too many times. She needs me to provide more in our relationship than i need from her to be happy. It leads to a point where I am doing things because I have to and not because i want to. For anyone out there who has been there, you understand. It is exhausting to be in a relationship where the person you want to please needs so much more than you do to be happy. We talked and she says that \"she is selfish and has been taking advantage of what i give\". Do I just take her word for it? she is more scared of losing me than she is of changing her personality.", "summary": "My GF requires more from the relationship than me. I confronted her about it and she said that she will change ( for the 3rd time.) do i take her word for it or do i finally leave her?"}
{"id": "t3_3l7kcl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [29 M] Girlfriend [26 F] spends more time with her mother than she does with me.", "post": "I've been dating this girl for about 3 years now and I've always thought her relationship with her mother was strange. Most of the girls I've dated in the past would seldom talk about their mothers or even talk TO their mothers, but she is incredibly different. She texts her mom constantly, calls her 3-4 times a day, calls her 'momma' like a kid would and not a day goes by where I don't hear something about her mom. Now, we live right around the corner from her mother and lately she has been spending the night there on and off for the past 2 weeks. She says it's because her mom is lonely and misses her, but I just can't wrap my head around it. \n\nMy first impression was that maybe she was cheating and using this as some form of cover, but she always snapchats me pictures of her and her mom hanging out, watching movies, etc. We barely have time to see each other during the week due to work and school, and then she spends what little free time she has with her mom instead of me? I should note that her parents absolutely hate me, for a long list of reasons. I've basically called them cheap and worthless to their faces for making their daughter pay for her own education and bills, leaving her in crippling debt while they're both making huge money as lawyers. I mean they have multiple boats, four houses in three different states and like six sports cars.. but they made her go into debt to get an education.\n\nBut I digress, what can I do? Am I slowly being weeded out of her life by a manipulative mother? There's a ton I could probably include about this but I wanna keep it relatively short.", "summary": "Girlfriend spends more time with her mother, not sure why, her parents hate me and I think they're manipulating her to get me to break up with her or something."}
{"id": "t3_24v2pb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Hookup [20m] told me he loves me [20f] but doesn't know what he wants from our relationship", "post": "I've been \"hooking up\" with a guy for a little more than a month now. We clearly liked each other when we first got together--I stopped seeing a different guy before I even kissed him--and immediately had an incredible amount of sexual chemistry. We now sleep over in the other's room 5-6 nights a week (we're both in college), sometimes just to cuddle and fall asleep and not have sex. \n\nBecause we spend so much time together, friends have started referring to us as a couple. We've started to have the \"what are we doing\" conversation a few times, but it's always kind of been cut short-- or we've been drunk and decided we shouldn't talk about it anymore. \n\nFrom his perspective, he just finally ended a complicated open relationship with his girlfriend from high school, and I'm pretty sure is afraid of committing to something for the wrong reasons.\n\nLast night in bed, he was falling asleep and told me he loved me for the first time. He said he wasn't \"in love\" with me, but loved me \"in the chill way.\" I told him it's not that I didn't feel the same, but that I knew I was going to get my feelings hurt since I didn't know his intentions with us. He said he didn't know either, and that was the end of the conversation. Is he just trying to mess with my emotions? What should I be doing at this point?", "summary": "Serious hookup of a month+ told me he loved me but isn't sure what his intentions are with me. Am I gunning to get my feelings hurt?"}
{"id": "t3_42gx97", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by allowing myself to be stood up and telling a friend about it", "post": "As always, this didn't actually happen today\n\nI made plans with a girl I had been talking to online for a few months for her to come down and visit me. She didn't live too far but it was still three trains away. Well the day came and she hadn't been responding to my messages. Waited all day, she didn't come. I get a message the next day just: *I have a virus*. I called 'bullshit' and just ignored the message. She stood me up.\n\nThe day after, I was talking to a friend of mine about it. We were friends as kids, family are pretty close, they moved away not so long ago. She asked me whether I was a virgin and I confided in her, telling her that I had been recently stood up. She laughed for a solid two minutes. At first I was laughing with her but that eventually faded. She immediately apologised (she could tell I wasn't enjoying it) but couldn't hold herself any longer. I eventually hung up and couldn't bear the embarrassment anymore. We usually give each other a hard time and laugh but this was just plain mean.\n\nI feel like shit still.", "summary": "got stood up by a girl, told a good friend, got laughed at, hung up with embarrassment. Still feel like crap about it."}
{"id": "t3_vf5m3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Have you and your girlfriend / boyfriend ever had trouble deciding where to live?", "post": "Me: 27F   Him : 27M\n\nI've been with my boyfriend for almost a year now. We just moved in together and everything so far is going great.\n\nWe started talking about how maybe we can buy a house in two years. We both rapidly saw that we want different things.\nI'm a city girl and pretty much want to live and work in the city I'm currently in.\n\nHe wants to move a bit out of the city. He says the city is a lot more expensive, which of course it is, and he wants a bigger house with a backyard. He also wants a quieter life away from the city.\n\nI currently don't have a car. I told him that I'm sure we can compromise and come to a decision. I'll get a car so we have more options, but I really want to stay close to the city.\n\nWe looked at a map together, and he has no problem moving away where it would be a 30 - 40 minutes high way drive to get to the city.\nTo me this seems far and I'm not excited about it at all.\n\nWe agreed that when the time comes, we'll both have to compromise to make sure we're both happy.\n\nI want to make it work, but I'm a little bit scared that we'll never be able to. I don't see how we can both be happy, since no matter what we decide it won't be what one person wanted.\n\nSo reddit, have you ever had a similar problem , and if you did, what did you do?\n\nWhat was the compromise and what was the conclusion to this dilemma?\n\nThanks :)", "summary": "My boyfriend and I want very different things when it comes to deciding where to live. I want to live in the city, he wants to move away. Has anyone else ever had this problem?"}
{"id": "t3_3bc6t1", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [19M] met a nice girl a few years older [23F]", "post": "So I was at a bar with my friend, we had a couple beers and decided to go talk to some people/girls. I went and talked to this one girl and her friends, after a bit, our friends seemed to disperse to leave us as we had really started talking. We talked and walked around together in the bar for a good hour or two. It got late and she had to head back to her parents she was staying with. She gave me her number and I when I texted saying it was nice to meet her, she replied very nicely.\n\nThe thing that stuck out the most is the way she touched me, it may have been the alcohol influencing her, but she put my hands on her several times as we were walking. However, this might have been to deter guys that were hitting on her as she walked away from them with me. I don't think she even really drank much as she appeared kind of sober, and had me finish most of the only beer I saw her drinking that night. (I had a half dozen+) She seemed a bit held up on the fact that she was \"old\", but I reassured her that she wasn't.\n\nWe are both leaving in a week or two, but will be return at the same time in a few months. At the very least, I would like to see this girl again, even if it's just going out as friends (we left on a good note). I'm open to the possibility of more, but don't know how I would proceed or if things could work out.", "summary": "Met a girl a few years older, we got along great, seemed to be some physical attraction, but age may have been a factor holding us back. Not sure what to do now."}
{"id": "t3_1edlz9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [23M] being irrational for being upset with my gf [22F] ?", "post": "Hey reddit, \n\nYesterday afternoon I made plans with my girlfriend of 6 months to go see a pre-screening of the internship after I finished work. \n\nWhen we talked, I informed her that the screeners of the movie always overbook the tickets so it's always full and because of this we needed to get there early, so we agreed that she'd pick me up directly from the train and we'd go over. \n\nSo, she picks me up and we head over. On the way she informs me that she is starving and hasn't eaten all day long and wants to stop before at the whole foods. I tell her that if we don't go straight there we won't get seats, but if we go get our seats first, she could leave and run over because we'd have time to spare. \n\nShe refuses to park first and just drops me off out front. I go in where there's already a line, you have to check your phone (anti-piracy), and long story short it sells out before she gets back just like I knew it would. For the record, you can't save seats because they fill every seat. \n\nHere's the thing, I really wanted to see this movie and she isn't that big into going to the movies. I just started working downtown 9 hours a day + commute and she's just moved home from college. I repeatedly told her to grab a snack before hand because if we didn't go straight there we'd miss it. \n\nIt's just frustrating because it seems like she willfully and selfishly put her needs in front of mine. \n\nI won't try to parallel my behavior with hers for the sake of objectivism, but I know for a fact that I have in the past given her my full consideration for things she's wanted to do, even if I didn't really want to go. \n\nReddit am I wrong for seeing this as selfish at most and thoughtless at best?", "summary": "I missed a pre-screening of a movie because my gf decided to go to the grocery store right before against my firm advisement."}
{"id": "t3_wigts", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend [21] smokes weed. Not bothered by it, but wondering if my [18/f] requests are too overbearing.", "post": "Hi, guys!\n\nSo my boyfriend and I have only been together for a couple of weeks, and he recently told me he smokes weed responsibly(as in, doesn't drive or anything whilst under the influence). I told him it didn't bother me, but was too afraid to request that he doesn't do it around me or be around me while under the influence in fear of it being too overbearing. My reasons behind my request are mostly about legality, not morality or aversion to weed.\n\nWhat does /r/relationships think? Is it overbearing to ask that he doesn't do it in front of me? Or is this a rational request? Thanks, guys!", "summary": "Boyfriend does weed, doesn't bother me, I just don't want him to do it in front of me. Wondering if too overbearing to ask this."}
{"id": "t3_3eqiab", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to get my car door un-stuck", "post": "So this wasn't today but it was a few months ago.  \n\nDead of winter, I often had to bump my hip against the door to get the ice to break so I can open the door. Today was another one of those days. But my door no matter what I could do, wouldn't open. \n\nI began googling ideas. One idea said to use rubbing alcohol. I spent about an hour outside trying very hard to continue to apply rubbing alcohol to help ease the door. No luck. A few minutes later, I ask my wife to come help me. She comes outside in the freezing cold, and I ask her to pull on the door while I pour the rubbing alcohol. \n\nNot even a few seconds later, she grabs the keys, puts them in the door, unlocks the car, and opens the door.", "summary": "Sat outside in the freezing cold for an hour trying to de-ice car enough to open doors only to have my wife unlock the car and open the doors."}
{"id": "t3_1p0iwc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20 M] need help getting over my [20 F] Crush.", "post": "Hello guys. So i'll just start off by saying there is a girl, a girl i've been a schoolmate with for 8 years and have known her for about 13 years.\n\nFor as long as i can remember, i had a crush on her. Thought it was just going to pass, but i liked her more and more, so i worked up the nerve to ask her for her number a while ago. We never really hang out or anything, but we always greeted each other and talked for a bit if we saw each other anywhere.\n\nI got the number, even though it seemed like she wasn't too interested when she gave me it. She made an excuse when i called her to meet up, so i just figured she's not interested, but i can't just forget her, i'm in deep, even hearing her voice when i called her is like a drug to me. \n\nShe studies in a city about an hour away at the moment, which i will be going to with my friend. It's not because of her, we're going just to go out and party there, it's the capital here.\n\nWhich brings me up to my question.\nDo you guys/girls think there is still a chance? Should i call her one last time when i'll be there and ask if there is a chance if she makes an excuse again or what? If not,\n\nHow do I get over a lifelong crush?", "summary": "I have a crush on a girl i know for about 13 years and it's pretty bad, how do i get over her?."}
{"id": "t3_1qv6ob", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my [21F] ex of 4 years is talking to me again after her failed relationship, wants to be friends.", "post": "Long story short my ex of our 4 year relationship wanted to have the single life kind of put me on the back burner, so we broke up, she jumped into a relationship, i went NC immediately and tried to move on and live my life. Her relationship failed, she messaged me telling me if we could be friends again, i don't think much of it so i say yes.\n\nShe tells me how good i was to her and how some lucky girl is going to get me and she wishes me the best. I say thank you and i tell her i hope to find that lucky girl.\n\nShe invites me to hang out with her and a friend of hers, and later he friend told me she was worried my ex would make it weird by bringing up our old relationship.\n\nDoes she want a friendship or something more?", "summary": "ex of 4 years breaks up with me, gets crushed in her new relationship, tells me how good i was to her and wants to be friends. What does she expect from me?"}
{"id": "t3_wa863", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need some advise", "post": "Ill make it short. I've (m25) been with this chick(30) for about a year and a half. she's great but there's some issues I can't get past and don't know how serious I should let it get.\n\nLast year we were both fresh out of long relationships and were taking it slow. we wanted to start dating but she was leaving to go back home and work with her dad for the summer so we decide to wait till she gets back, promising to wait for each other. fast forward to the end of summer, she text me when she gets back that she didn't sleep with any one but her ex left some hickies. I don't press for details and we pick up where we left off just \"officially\" dating. fast forward a few months I find out she blew him the night before she came back. I'm pissed but I reason that we weren't official so I couldn't let it bug me. then later she tells me of her five man gangbang... ouch. that one gets me. I had known of her promiscuous past (50 + she \" remembers\") but this was a bit of a deal breaker. now it all adding up and I can't take her seriously. \n\nI've talked to her about it and she knows how I feel but it gets us no where. and here I am a year later feeling the same way. every thing is good besides and were talking about getting a place but Idk. sex isn't even special with her anymore knowing what I do. it my problem to get over I know but how? it all goes away when I'm with cuz I just can't see her being like that but these twelve hour shift have thinkin a lot and its got me fucked up.\n\nI never would have started dating her had I known what happened when she got back. But I found out after feelings were already there. Now I'm torn. Do I throw it all away or stick with it and hope I can eventually look past it?", "summary": "I FEEL WE HOOKED UP UNDER FALSE PRETENSE AND I'M NOT SURE IF I SHOULD LET IT GET ANY MORE SERIOUS."}
{"id": "t3_4g6jln", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 F] with my [20 M] bf 1.5 year relationship", "post": "Basically, bf (lets call him Andy) and I have been together for about 1.5 years and for the past 4-5 months has been pure chaos. He did something to betray me and I decided to give him another chance and although I do see his loyalty now and I truly believe he is not playing any games, we still fight a lot about petty things (admittedly half is my own fault) and I'm not sure what to do. At one point he is someone that I wanted to marry in the future and he still speaks as if he wants to as well, but all I feel is anger bc I have such a short temper and he knows exactly what to say to make me angry. I do love him a lot but we are both extremely stressed from school and various activities, so we always seem to push each other's buttons. I used to be very mean with my words and I think that now I don't do it at all I do not call him names, but he calls me very rude names when he's angry and claims that \"its not that serious\" when the words (i suppose aren't THAT mean) but really hurt me.\n\nAny suggestions on what to do? Is there any sort of exercise we could do to just calm down and not blow up at each other all the time? \n\nI know that \"break up\" will be something most people might say but I just want to make sure I did all that I could have and tried the most that I could before ending things with someone I love.", "summary": "any advice for someone who doesn't want to break up with SO but constantly fight over little things? Both SO and I are extremely stressed out from school and EC as well as finals coming up."}
{"id": "t3_34hpbc", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "[Auto] Stressful Car-payments", "post": "I read the sidebar, hopefully I'm within ordinance with the rules, if not, my apologies. This maybe long... \n\nThis may sound irresponsible and I lose sleep over it, but about 3 months ago my lovely \"you have to pay for it yourself\" graduation present started to die.\n\n So, since I have a part-time job, while attending college full-time in a STEM degree, which eats all my time up I started looking around for a new car. The dealership my parents got their car at said they could help me. After a few days of back and forth they said they got a brand new 2014 car approved for me. Me being ignorant to my financial ability agreed, along with having a major influence from almost everyone in my family telling me to \"take it.\"\n\nWell, next summer I'm suppose to transfer out and I'll be in Uni, taking 40-60 hours a semester for the next 3 years. The only probelm with this is it will render me unable to afford my $300 a month car payment. My folks have said they would \"pay\" for it, but that's just about as reliable as Direct TV during a thunderstorm. \n\nI'm trying to be responsible and look into my options, but every chance I take I get told that I'm making a stupid decision. I have 6 more years of $300 monthly car payments that is going to be next to impossible. I've thought about dropping out and paying it off, but that throws everything off.", "summary": "have $300 car payment, wont be able to afford come next summer, trying to find the most suitable way of mitigating the damage I've caused; if at all possible."}
{"id": "t3_1ylz47", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] of 2.5 years, dating", "post": "We are really good for each other. I can't imagine someone who is more compatible with me intellectually and by personality, social situation, etc.\n\nThe only thing missing is the spark. We never had that spark. She was a girl that I admired, but I can't say that she ever gave me butterflies. And ever so often, I go out without her and meet someone new or someone from the past who gives me those crush-y feelings. I never act on them by any means.\n\nMy thoughts are that that feeling is something that only ever lasts in the honeymoon stage, so it really isn't important in the long-term of our relationship that I (or maybe we) never felt it. But it does bug me ever so often.\n\nWhat are your thoughts. Thank you :)", "summary": "I'm with a really amazing girl that's very, very compatible with me but it concerns me that I never had the 'butterflies' for her, when I do get that feeling for other girls."}
{"id": "t3_3881ax", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What's this girl's deal??", "post": "I've know this girl (17f) for a few months, let's call her Holly. We've been talking pretty much non stop for those few months. Last month, she told me she loves me (18m). We're not in a relationship necessarily, but I really like her, but we are pretty far away, about 200km. For a girl who claims to be \"in love\" with me, her actions seem very strange to me. \n\nSo she's been going to parties, texting a few guys, having kissed them at parties and whatnot, being very open telling me this. I don't really mind considering we're by no means in a relationship. But here's where I'm a little confused. She tells me she loves me, she has a tinder account and is texting this other guy that lives near her. Does she just like the attention? She's adamant that she loves me and she sees no problem with it. But the guy doesn't know that! He thinks she's only texting him, needless to say she doesn't tell all her tinder matches that she's \"in love\". She's really nice whenever we FaceTime and chat, and I really like her then, but this stuff is just crazy to me. I want to pursue something with her, but really, is it ever worth it?", "summary": "Girl I've been talking to tell me she loves me. Continues to \"hook up\"/text a couple guys around her and use tinder a lot. Jump ship?"}
{"id": "t3_3kgvmy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [20 M] and I think I spend too much time with my gf [21 F]", "post": "She's my first serious relationship, and I love her. She loves me too, and I think I may have a problem with wanting to be around her all the time. We see each other practically everyday and she spends the night all the time. But it's gotten to the point where if I know she's out with her friends and stuff I feel a bit jealous of them because she's with them and not me. And I think that leads me to feel like she's not showing her love or affection as much. I know I should just hang out with friends and stuff but I recently moved here and don't really know too many people. Plus my work/school schedule kind of prohibit me from going out and on top of that I have guardianship over my little brother so i'm basically a dad at the same time. How do I get over this feeling of her choosing them over me, when I know that's stupid but it's how I think sometimes.", "summary": "I think I want to spend an unhealthy amount of time with the gf. Want to know how to break that urge."}
{"id": "t3_2eoy5i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 F] don't like kissing. I've known this for a while now, and no amount of kissing good or bad will change that. How do I bring it up to the person I'm dating?", "post": "Not dating anyone right now, but a hypothetical future person as I'm getting back into the dating game. \n\nA little more about me: I'm bisexual and very sexually fluid. Sometimes I even feel asexual. I'm also a virgin, but I'm really ready to not be. My only problem is I reeeeaalllly hate kissing. I hate the way my mouth feels and tastes. I hate the sounds, the smells, everything pretty much. I *might* like kissing someone I'm in love or infatuated with, but I have yet to experience that. (Most people like to kiss to eventually experience those feelings.) \n\nI've had some dating experience, and I even really liked a guy once who I was seeing. But once we became intimate and made out, I got really weird and I think I scared him off a bit. (I also divulged that I was a virgin, oh well.) He stopped talking to me after that, obviously he was not someone I would've wanted to be with anyway. \n\nSo what do I do? When do I bring this up? And don't tell me I'll eventually like it when I find a good kisser, because I've kissed good kissers and I still hated it.", "summary": "Hate kissing, what do? When do I tell the person I'm dating without scaring them off? And how do I tell them?"}
{"id": "t3_fhgy4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit - If I found a way to help people who are going without medical care because they don't have money, would you be interested in helping?", "post": "I am a banker.  I see the impact medical costs have on people's health and finances. \n\nSometimes I see people who are looking for a loan to cover a deductible for a surgery they need.  Sometimes I see people in pain because they can't afford to go to the dentist to get a bad tooth drilled or removed.\n\nOther times I see people who HAVE insurance who are still financially wrecked because of the part of their meds they still need to cover.  For instance I have a client who has a specific type of cancer.  It is treatable but the meds cost $150,000 per year!!!  His insurance covers all but $18,000, but that still leaves him $1500/month to cover and that's pretty hard when you are not working because you feel like shit.\n\nSo anyway, I am sick of seeing people left behind.  I have seen Reddit help people get medicine, new wheelchairs, cover the cost of funerals when tragedy strikes...yeah you guys are a pretty benevolent bunch.\n\nI am developing a website that will help people out of these situations.  It is still in the conceptual stage, but I sent in my application for non-profit status today.  (THAT was a bitch!)\n\nWhen it launches, I would like to post it to Reddit so you can check it out and support it if you feel like it is worthy.  \n\nBUT - I suck at getting things noticed on Reddit.  My posts tend to drop faster than Charlie Sheen's fly at the Bunny Ranch.  I think I am doing it wrong.\n\nSO - When it launches, where should I post it?\n\nALSO - What do you think your interest level would be in something like this if you could easily establish that it was legit and was really helping people?  Something you could get behind?\n\nPlease message me with questions, if you have any.  And thanks!", "summary": "I am designing a website to help people with their medical costs.  I want to post it on Reddit when it launches but don't know exactly the best way to do it."}
{"id": "t3_4ipgjf", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/F] My boyfriend [28/M] thinks I'm getting a diploma because of \"daddy's money\"", "post": "Hi there /r/relationship_advice , long time lurker here !\n\nI'm using a throwaway because my bf is a fellow redditor.\n\u00a0\n\n   A bit of background : I'm a 22 year old girl from Greece , I  sat the national exams, managed to get myself in a CS Univeristy, which I unfortunately ended up abandoning after 1 year, since I had some personal issues. After a one year break , I decided that I had to do something in my life , and I ended up in a private CS (Computer Science ) college. \n\u00a0\n\nMy boyfriend , followed the same process as me , but he got in a national Technical School ( maybe that's the wrong term  ,but here we have : universities > technical schools , as we call them , or as I roughly translate at least :P ). He is now on his 10th year and he has to pass 1 lesson to get his degree. He is interested in computers , which has nothing to do with what he used to study.\n\u00a0\n\u00a0\n\n**The problem** : Well the obvious problem is that he thinks I'm getting a degree no matter what , because my father's paying a bunch of money. The other problem is that he thinks I'm stupid he explains the most basic stuff like he would explain it to a 4 year old.\n\u00a0\n\u00a0\n\nFor example: \"You cannot do [insert paragraph here] with this command, the database doesn't allow it\" . And I'm like \"yeah , I know, that's pretty basic stuff\".\n\nI'm seriously thinking of not inviting him to my graduation ceremony,  because what's really the point?  How should I handle this situation?", "summary": "Bf thinks I'm graduating only because my father's paying for a CS college.  Bf also thinks I'm stupid. 99% sure I won't invite him to my graduation ceremony."}
{"id": "t3_p03rh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How selfish is too selfish?", "post": "She: 26, Me: 29 together about 5 years, off and on, mostly on.\n\nShe tends to be rather selfish in my opinion in the relationship.  The basic rule is to not talk too much about yourself because it's boring, but she always talks about herself.  Recently I told her how I felt, that I'd like to change the subject more often and maybe stop talking about her all the time.  I do care about her world, but it would be nice if she weren't so selfish in the conversations.  I know females love attention, but honestly, it's about give AND take.\n\nQuestion - am I in the wrong to think she's selfish when our conversations involve a lot more \"I\" and \"me\" and \"my\" than \"you\" or \"our\"?  When I told her what I did she didn't snap and we didn't fight about it, but based on her reaction I don't know if anyone else has ever told her that she's kind of...egocentric.", "summary": "I know women love to be the center of attention, but is it wrong to call them on this so they realize the other person is actually a person not a lap dog?"}
{"id": "t3_1z4dx7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] am getting seriously offended by my friend [16/F] I don't wanna make a deal about it because I'm terrified of being alone for prom.", "post": "So I'm going to prom with this girl I dated from November up to late January. We're still good friends, we didn't stop dating for any bad reason, It was just that she felt guilty about dating me so soon after breaking up with someone.\n\nShe's a nice girl all in all but there's just one thing. She has this flirty thing that she does where she insults me.\n\nNow I can take a joke or whatever but she really goes to far and hurts me.\n\nI'm a short guy, I'm 5'6 and I look young for my age and before I met this girl I had no problem with it.\n\nShe constantly tells me how I'm not actually 18 and that her 15 year old friends look older, she tells me that i'm a midget, she tells me that my voice is too high and worst of all she complains about how she can't wear heels to prom because she's going with me and doesn't want to be taller than the guy.\n\nRecently I'v been getting really depressed about my height and young looks because of all this. \n\nIt's going too far and I wan't to tell her without her getting offended and deciding to not go to prom with me that I'm getting really depressed about the things shes saying to me.", "summary": "Friend is making me feel insecure about my height, I want to tell her how I feel but I don't want to be alone for prom."}
{"id": "t3_2fh0a4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] going to a small festival at which my recent ex-boyfriend [21M] will also be at.", "post": "So, to give a little background to the story, my ex and I broke up this past July after getting together in May.. it was short, however, we fell very hard for each other. Our summer spent together was beautiful, we had an amazing time with one another. That is, until he decided it wasn't worth his time.\n\nAnyway, this post isn't about the break up. I met my ex up in Vermont at his school where my best friend goes to. We all share mutual friends, as I have become close with their friends up there. Everyone is going to this festival, which I'm very excited for, however, he is as well.\n\nI've been doing pretty alright for the most part since the break up. I meditated and severed the mental attachment I had to him (for the most part.) What I mean by that is meditating, imagining a clear connection to the person who you are attached to emotionally, and then severing it. All mental and meditation.. \n\nSo point being, thinking about him doesn't throw me into despair and panic attacks. However, finding out last night that I will be seeing him and quite possibly hanging out in the same group at our campsite might be really difficult..\n\nMy fear is losing my shit if he doesn't talk to me and losing my shit if he does indeed talk to me. I don't plan on staying sober that weekend which might make that even more possible.\n\nI'm not sure what I need to do to prepare myself. I need advice how to go about this entire situation if I do see him. Should I say hello? Be the bigger person? My mind screams no because he really hurt me and took the wrong way to break up the relationship.. but at the same time I really don't want to have a bad time and have others feel negative energy when we're all trying to hang out and have a good time..", "summary": "Ex and I will be at the same tiny festival. Bumping into each other is inevitable. Don't know how I should go about this encounter when it happens."}
{"id": "t3_18ap0z", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25/m] How to deal with nonmonogamous desires in a monogamous relationship?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for 3 years. Although our \"puppy love\" has gone, I love more than anyone. However, I have sexual and (less often) emotional attractions to other people. We have spoken about having an open relationship, but she needs monogamy. \n\nI feel trapped: to leave her would cause me immense pain, but to stay causes me pain on a regular basis.\n\nHow common is it to have these desires?\nHow can I get out of this trap?\n\nI realize this may just be a case where there is no information anyone can give me, but even a little advice on how to come to a decision would be helpful. I've been trying to work it out on my own for months.", "summary": "hurts to stay because I get crushes on other people, hurts to leave because I love her. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_3c8pd7", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By asking a person from my town if he was english.", "post": "So today i was going home  from a  gym tired as hell, when i see a guy walking by. He had a shirt with a team from american football which is pretty rare to find in my country (Denmark). Nevertheless i say hello in Danish and he says hi back. Only, it didn't really sound like he said it in danish. I then  became sure that he was an american since he even had that american football shirt on. I then say \"Oh so do you talk english?\" and he says very frankly \"nej\" (which is the word for no in case you're as dumb as me). I stand there for about 5 seconds feeling extremely awkward about it until i finally say goodbye.", "summary": "I thought that a man from my country even though he talked danish, asked him if he was english, and looked like an idiot."}
{"id": "t3_10x2g2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Am I insane for thinking about transferring from Harvard to a less prestigious university?", "post": "Using a throwaway for fear of my SO seeing this post. \n\nI am a freshman at what is considered a \"prestigious\" American university. Let me just start off saying it has been a wonderful experience academically. None of my classes are larger than 100 people, which provides the support I like to have from my professors. That being said, the social scene has not been treating me well. I have not been making any \"real\" friends and the party/drinking scene here is just not for me. I suppose that might be due in part to the fact that my longterm SO and I are attending school together. Actually, its more like we attend our entire lives together. All of our friends are mutual, our holidays consist of both our families, and we pretty much do most things in unison. I also have been connected to some very influential people because of my SO's family. I have begun to realize that while I have only been here a short time, I am at a major crossroads. Part of me wants to start living my own life but the other part of me says I should simply put up with whatever in order to reach my aspirations (which I might add, are very high for an average 19 y/o). \nReddit, would giving up all the opportunities by transferring be worth it if I were \"happy\"?", "summary": "I basically feel like my whole life has begun to be lived for someone/something else and I have no clue what to do about it."}
{"id": "t3_2b1khq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Bf (24m) and I (20f) just got into a fight because he doesn't understand why I hate it when he checks out other women when he never looks at me like that", "post": "Don't get me wrong. We all notice attractive people. That's not the issue. The issue is...when we're out he points out nice bodies. When we watch tv he drools over the actresses. But then I try to start something sexual, and he has a million and one excuses why not to. I hate it...I know only you are responsible for your self esteem, but mine is plummeting. I'm not unattractive. I work out, and I dress nice every time I see him. I just want him to look at me like that. He always brushes it off when I try to say how this hurts me. He just says I'm being immature and it's dumb to think he doesn't notice people. Once again, i would 100% not care if he could only look at me like that. He claims he has a low libido, but that's not true in my eyes...it's been like this since we got together just over a yr ago and I don't know what to do about it.", "summary": "BF checks out other women, but rarely has sex with me. Probably 2/10 times i try to initiate it he will accept it, and it will be boring passion-less sex."}
{"id": "t3_1ohc32", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I just turned 30 [F] and I am so disappointed by my husbands [30] behavior and gift on my birthday. Together since we were 18.", "post": "My husband and I are temporarily in different countries. He ruined my birthday with some very uncool behavior on his part (that ended up with him threatening to leave me on my birthday).  \n\nWe mostly worked through that until yesterday I went to the post office to get the gift he sent me. It was a week late (which would not have bothered me had he not utterly ruined my birthday) and it was just full of candy and a bag for a show that I sorta like and sorta hate (including the receipt for the bag $6.50 from Hot Topic). Even worse, the candy was not the candy I would prefer. He got me tropical flavored fruit by the foot, and I don't like tropical flavored anything, and peanut butter M&Ms, which are good, but more of his thing than mine. \n\nI wouldn't have been upset about these oversights and lack of a \"real\" gift, except he already ruined my birthday. It just made me feel like he really doesn't give a damn. To be fair, he sent the package before my birthday, so he didn't realize at the time that he was going to ruin my birthday.\n\nAnyway, I talked to him about it, and now I feel bad. I shouldn't be ungrateful and I know I hurt his feelings. Still, I feel like his gift was so thoughtless and uncaring that I can't help but feel hurt. \n\nShould I not have said anything? Am I being terrible?", "summary": "Husband ruined my 30th birthday with very bad behaviour, and I was getting over it until I received his really crummy birthday gift."}
{"id": "t3_xvvdl", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I think my roommate might be brainwashed. Help?", "post": "I wasn't sure where to post this, so if this is the wrong place, just point me somewhere else.\n\nMy roommate went to this \"training workshop\" called [Pathways Core Training, inc.] over the winter break this year.\n\n At first I thought it was just a group therapy organization, and thought he was better off for doing it, but recently he has been behaving strangely. Before this camp he was a lot like myself, and I'm sure many of you: cynical, skeptical, easygoing, and a smidge of socially awkward. In short, a great guy to be around. Nowadays he is constantly on edge (at least towards me) and refuses to accept criticism or any kind of insult. Not that I'm being cruel, we're just guys, and guys do that sort of thing. \n\nDespite all this, he claims to be the happiest and freest he's ever been. He constantly posts statuses involving the word \"blessed\" but if I, or anyone, says something even slightly negative on it, he gets defensive and angry. \n\nOn top of the behavior listed above, he has also been actively recruiting for this \"Training\" workshop. His mother, two of his friends, and his girlfriend of barely a month have all gone since he was forced to go by his then-girlfriend last December/January. \n\nI'm only an undergrad in my psychology program, but this seems to have all the warning signs of someone joining a cult/being brainwashed. Has anyone else heard of this Dallas-based group or had any experience with them? This guy was(is?) one of my best friends, and I'm worried about him. I'm also worried about my friends that he will get to also drink the kool-aid.", "summary": "My friend went to a training thing in Dallas and came back all different. I think he may be brainwashed. What do you think? What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3w6fne", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Should I get rid of my mole? 16 Male", "post": "I have a mole that has been kinda bothering me for the past year or so. I've had it my whole life, but recently I began getting self conscious about it. It is located between [the 12 and 15 spot in the left side](\n\nThe problem with the mole is that it is raised and it is way darker than my skin tone, so it stands out.\n\nI've never really gotten any criticism or teases about it.\n\nIt isn't too big. [It is around the size of this, but way darker](\n\nI kind of want to get rid of it, but I also don't because I feel like I will be missing a part of me when I do. \n\nWhat are you guys' thoughts on it?", "summary": "I have a mole near my chin that stands out, but I am afraid to remove it because I think i'll be missing a \"part of me\"."}
{"id": "t3_1ob5wh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[26F] with my boyfriend[35M] he visits his kids at his ex's house. Is this normal?", "post": "My boyfriend of 3.5 years goes over to his ex wife's house, and stays there to visit his kids. I've tried everything to tell him that I am not comfortable with this kind of behavior, because I think it is not normal. His excuse is that it costs too much money to drive back and forth, so I have offered him money for gas and to pay for activities for him and the kids(I work most days when he has them) so he doesn't have to spend the time there. He still refuses to stop going over there. I am at my breaking point with this and I need opinions.", "summary": "Is it ever acceptable to stay at the ex-wife's house for visitation instead of picking up the kids and going to the park?"}
{"id": "t3_3xqx97", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/F] with my roommate [22F] 7 months, who is unstable", "post": "My roommate lets call her sofie is unstable. Ive lived here since June 2015, and things have slowly gotten worse. Lately, Ive taken to avoiding her. But this recent incident occurred that has really driven me up a wall.\n\nSo I have my good family friend, pretty much my uncle over last night. I have not seen him in a month or two. Him and I are talking in my apartment's living room. Then Sofie grabs her art project and sits on the floor, coloring while my uncle and I are talking. She continues to interrupt the conversation and constantly invalidate what I say. The best part was my uncle asked me a question and she totally interrupted and answered it for me.\n\nNow her and I barely talk. Because she tries to micromanage and control me or she downplays everything I say. I've been avoiding her and she acts like everything is fine when I have family over. She does not talk to me and only did so last night.\n\nFurther examples of what she does\n\n1. My roommates and I have all paid her for utilities and she said she paid the bill. She did not and our power got shut off.\n\n2. My girlfriend at the time was over and Sofie asked if my gf wanted a hug and proceeded to hug her without waiting for a response.\n\n3. She leaves dishes in the sink and doesn't do them. But tells me how to do my dishes. Btw I'm a well paid dishwasher at a fancy pasta place.\n\n4.  Constantly interrupts me and disagrees. Not just normal disagreeing but everything I say she says is wrong. She was at my job and in front of my coworkers interrupted me and invalidated my statement.", "summary": "Roommate constantly interrupted me last night when I had my uncle over. She never apologized and she never talks to me in the first place."}
{"id": "t3_3dhzj9", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Pennsylvania] Wife was in fender bender with uninsured neighbor", "post": "My wife was backing out of our driveway today at the same time as our across the street neighbor.  They collided rear-bumper to rear-bumper.  Neither saw the other so it was relatively high speed.  I was at work already when this happened.\n\nMy wife drives a Prius C and they drive a Highlander with a hitch.  As you can imagine, damage was fairly extensive for my wife and pretty much nada for the neighbor.\n\nNeighbors are a husband and wife, native Spanish speakers.  The husband speaks very little English.  They conferred for a while in Spanish and told my wife that they have no car insurance ... well they have insurance but it's registered in Maryland ... well actually they have no car insurance.  That's pretty much how it was communicated.\n\nThis seems pretty cut and dry.  Make an insurance claim, pay the deductible, get the repairs done.  But we really do not want to cause a whole host of legal/insurance problems for the neighbors.  We would hate to have their lives turned upside down because of a small fender bender which only caused bumper damage to one vehicle.  At the same time, we don't have the money to cover this outright.  \n\nI'm afraid our only option is the traditional route.  Can anyone share how much of an impact this may have on their lives?  Are there any other options I just may be missing?  Thanks.", "summary": "Wife and uninsured neighbors in fender bender.  Don't want to fuck them over but can't cover cost straight up."}
{"id": "t3_2vc9fa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] have a crush on someone [22M] even though I'm in a long term relationship with an amazing person [22M]", "post": "Hey guys. Throwaway, yadda yadda.\n\nI'm a university student who has been dating the same guy, who I'll call Mark, for almost all of college. We celebrated our 3-yr anniversary in December, and our relationship has been 99% wonderful and fulfilling and positively challenging for the entire time. I love Mark so freaking much, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I am so in love with him.\n\nUnfortunately, I'm developing a crush on someone outside of my relationship :( I've known this guy, I'll call him Jeff, for awhile but I only recently started to know him a little better. We have mutual friends and see each other every once in awhile, and he is amazing. Jeff is just an overall incredible person, just like Mark.\n\nI feel so guilty. Of course Mark and I have tiny problems to work on just like any couple, but nothing that would make me want to abandon our relationship. I hate that I feel myself blush and get nervous whenever I see Jeff walk into a room. Disclaimer: I would NEVER, and I repeat, EVER cheat on Mark. Furthermore, Jeff knows that I am in a relationship, and even though I suspect he might feel the same about me, he will never pursue me out of respect for my relationship.\n\nPretty much, the only problem I'm having is that I don't know why I am feeling this way. Mark is wonderful and amazing, so why do I care about Jeff? I am graduating soon and me & Mark's relationship will be under a lot of stress as we try to find our footing in the real adult world, so I don't want to be feeling this way.\n\nIs this normal? Why is this happening? Should I tell Mark or just let it be? Should I avoid contact with Jeff? Thank you all so much!", "summary": "I'm in a great long-term relationship but I'm developing a crush. Why & how is this happening, and how can I make it stop?"}
{"id": "t3_r1qjm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Has anyone had that sense that someone is about to die?", "post": "My story: I was going to visit my great grandfather for a birthday dinner it was two weeks past my birthday I do not remember why. He was 90 and very active would walk every day about a mile. We pull up in front of his house and grab groceries as usual. I had this weird sense that something was not quite right and sort of knew that this was the last of something it was eerie. Walking into the house we heard him calling for help he had fallen or something. Calling the paramedics he was resuscitated and taken to the hospital about 3 hours later he was gone.", "summary": "visited great grandfather pulled up in front of house sensed something was wrong passed away in the house, revived by paramedics. Dies later at the hospital"}
{"id": "t3_3gl1fx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19 M] with my girlfriend [19F] of nearly 2 years, growing distant and unattracted.", "post": "Hi, firstly, thanks for taking the time to read.\n\nI am 19 and we met at sixth form (college?). She then went to uni and I did not.. So we have a long distance relationship which she is currently back from over summer.\n\nThings were great and I visited her as much as financially possible, spent so much money, time and effort into seeing her. We argued ALOT however.\n\nAlso during this time, I began to really take care of myself and my fitness levels due to family reasons which means I work out a lot. However she has done the opposite. Put on a lot of weight during uni and doesn't seem to care, unless it's for a day and then goes back to her old ways.\n\nI have also spoke to my fears and told her I no longer find her AS attractive but it did not go well. She changed her way for about 4 days and also seemed see me as a different person during that time like I had broken her trust or something when I was also trying to help her help herself, as I know she complains about her weight. I also used to be EXTREMELY overweight so I know what it's like.\n\nI don't know if it's the weight, the distance or a mixture of everything and general life taking a toll but I now feel extremely distant from her. She recently went away to see family for 5 days and we barely spoke or texted the entire time, around 10minutes on a night time and a few texts sparingly throughout the day.\n\nDoes anyone have any advice? Does perhaps this situation seem familiar to you? Any advice will help", "summary": "summary: Girlfriend put on weight. Also growing emotionally distant from one another due to a mix of long distance/weight and other shit."}
{"id": "t3_4u0fnq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my fiance [27 F] 2 years, Mom's birthday is on the same day as my fiance's", "post": "So my mom's birthday is the same day as my fiance's, which is a disastrous coincidence.  What's worse is that my mom's 50th birthday is on the same day as my fiance's golden birthday.  Now I'm in an impossible scenario.  My fiance wants nothing more than to go out to eat with me, come home and sit on the couch and watch a movie, eat cake or ice cream or something, and of course  open her nice thoughtful card and gift that I got her.  \n\nMy mom wants everyone (me, my fiance, brother, sister-in law) to get together for her birthday and do something \"special,\" which really means bending over backwards and worshiping her all day while we do something stupid.  The problem is I can't reconcile the two.  My fiance doesn't want to spend her birthday hanging out with my annoying family, which is perfectly understandable, but my mom will probably freak out if I say that I can't do anything the day of her birthday.\n\nLast year I messed this up, I tried to celebrate my mom's birthday the day of her birthday and my fiance's birthday the day before, and it was apparently \"not special\" and what not. It seems that if you don't celebrate it on the right day then you might as well not be celebrating it.", "summary": "Mom and fiance have the same birthday, either way I lose and everyone is mad at me.  Are there any possible solutions to this dilemma?"}
{"id": "t3_jftkz", "subreddit": "self", "title": "In response to the recent posts about people overcoming depression:", "post": "It's all very nice that people can make changes in their lives to make it go away, but for many or most, that does not help at all. If you have been feeling depressed for a time longer than six months, and/or it interferes with your life, see a counselor AND GP. Sure, many have factors in their lives which cause them to feel this way, but many are genetically predisposed to the condition and no scenery change or 'opening up' will change that.\n\nGo to a counselor (not a psychiatrist) to determine whether your problems are psychological, and a GP to determine whether it is at all related to any physical issues that you may have (allergies, diet, et cetera). Go to a specialist at the recommendation of your counselor and GP. Starting with a specialist can be problematic, first because it may cost you unnecessarily, and second because, at least in my experience, someone who limits their field of work can sometimes limit their field of vision. Unnecessary treatment and incorrect diagnosis kind of suck. So, start out with a wide view, and work your way toward a more focused treatment.\n\nDon't just wait for it to get better, and don't expect the world to get better with a change of location. The worst week of my life, I spent in DisneyWorld.", "summary": "It's awesome that some people can make changes to their lives and get over depression. Others can't. See a doctor if there's an issue."}
{"id": "t3_213c46", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16/F] need a second opinion about my bf's [19/M] and my relationship, semi long distance, i'm having doubts?", "post": "we have been dating for about four months (but have known each other a year and I know he's a bit older, that is not something we are concerned about) and he recently moved into Seattle. I live on an island off Seattle and since i'm still in school I can only see him on the weekends. \n\nBut this is the fourth weekend I haven't been able to see him. Our only form of communication is text and he has told me he doesnt like texting. He will usually only text back if I ask him a question (i'm always asking questions...) and it will take him anywhere from two mintues to 12 hours to get back to me. \n\nI haven't been able to see him because since he just moved, he's still getting settled and looking for a job.  I know he cares about me. I feel like I might just be insecure and need to give it more time, but I have been really patient. \n\nAm I wasting my time or am I just insecure? I believe this relationship is worth the wait. What do you think?", "summary": "my boyfriend and I haven't seen each other in four weeks and I am looking for an opinion on whether it's worth it or not"}
{"id": "t3_rlc50", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Almost to my goal, but I've been stuck for the last 2 weeks.", "post": "Hello, I want to say two things. First, the stories on here inspired me to get to 220 from 250 that used to be 225 of almost no muscle. (Fat to bulky to less fat/less bulky) Your stories are hugely inspiring everyone! Secondly: please don't lynch me for my habits that I know are god aweful.\n\nI'm currently bouncing back and forth on and off from 220 - 223 and can't seem to break past it. I have classes from 10 to 3 most days and work on some of those days as well. \n\nDue to having almost no time to eat or prepare something my diet is a makeshift \"college student calorie counting diet.\" Basically: toast with peanut butter before I drive to campus. Two 90 calorie bars. I then usually don't have anything to eat since the commons and food halls close by now to prepare for dinner, so I go run my 2 miles at 8m a mile (I know it sucks, trying to train for a physical test coming up) and then do my muscle group for the day.\n\nThe main problem is I know my diet is terrible, but I am completely at a loss on how to make it work with a stupid busy schedule and being away from home all day. And to make matters worse I must work 12 hours over night (tonight) so rest and clean eating is almost impossible to acheive on nights like this.\n\nI hate to ask for advice, but I'm not sure what I can do to lose the next 20 pounds before the end of May? (Started January 1st) Also, my apologies if I left something out.", "summary": "250 January 1st. Now 220ish aiming for 200 by end of May. Horrible diet, a lot of running before lifting. Job and classes keep me too busy to do anything propper, including resting and eating. SOS"}
{"id": "t3_3qd9q8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] and my ex [22 M] broke up and hope is giving me anxiety", "post": "Me and my ex were together for 3 months, but we were good friends for a few more before that. We had great chemistry in my opinion, and we both loved the relationship. Unfortunately, he's going to grad school next year and he doesn't like the idea of \"crossing that bridge when we get there,\" he'd rather end it now before it hurts more. But I would have rather stuck with it, and enjoyed it as much as possible before it would (most likely end). Since he wanted to break up, we did. We decided to reassess our situation in 1 month and see how being apart it. That was 5 days ago. \n\nFor the first few days, it wasn't bad except for heartache. Today, I found out that he already had gotten his grindr back. I know he isn't a very sexual person, and why would he want a relationship? He probably just got it to talk but it still hurts really badly.\n\nAlso, he posted about maybe going to another year of school here, so it gave me a bit of hope we'd get back together. That hope is giving me anxiety and I can't do anything productive (I'm in pharmacy school, I need to!!)\n\nShould I talk to him about how I'm feeling? Or painfully wait it out?", "summary": "Broke up even though neither of us wanted to, I still have hope and it's tearing me apart. He reinstalled grindr and I don't know what to make of it."}
{"id": "t3_2j32av", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I 23 [f] have feelings for 27 [M] coworker", "post": "I've liked this guy at my job for six months. We'll call him Sam. At first we only talked when we were alone. When someone would walk in while we were talking it would get awkward. Now we talk all the time. We have so much in common. We both love horror movies and comics. I feel like there's something there and I dont know if its one sided. The problem is he has a girlfriend. We have never flirted with each other and he hardly ever talks about her. I normally wouldn't be interested in someone who's in a relationship but Ive only felt this way once. The only person Ive been in love with so I cant shake it off. What should I do?", "summary": "I have feelings for my coworker but he has a girlfriend. We talk all the time at work. We have never flirted with each other. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2vhzqw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] trying to deal with the fact that my FWB [28 M] is leaving in 4 months", "post": "I met my FWB last September, and we decided to keep it a purely FWB relationship. We are seeing each other exclusively and spend the bulk of our free time together. He and I text every day, and he's become my best friend during this last year of grad school. We graduate in May, and he is moving 8 hours back home after graduation. \n\nI told him that I am developing feelings for him, and he said that he liked me too. But right after that, he went on a rant about how he had a LDR with his last ex, and it took a toll on him. He didn't wish that tragedy on him or anyone else again. I understood and never brought up any discussion about feelings again.\n\nIt's starting to hit me that I dug myself a hole. \nHim leaving is going to hurt like a bitch. I can already feel it.\n\nBackground: A few months before I met him, I just got out of an abusive 5 year relationship. I don't want to go through this emotional wreckage again, but I know that losing him won't hurt nearly as much as what I went through last year with my ex. \n\nShould I just let this good thing run its course until July, or should I watch out for my emotional well-being and cut him off now before I fall deeper?", "summary": "I'm falling for my FWB who has turned into my senior year best friend. Should I continue what we have or end it?"}
{"id": "t3_28dyq1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] met a girl [20'sF] on a flight. Need an outside opinion on avoiding being \"that guy\"", "post": "Apologies if this is incredibly awkward...\n\nYesterday I was on a short flight and got into a really nice conversation with a girl I sat next to. We seemed to click on a lot of levels and as she left she gave me a hug. I was beaming for about an hour or so afterwards.\n\nShe gave me her profile on a social networking site that I don't belong to. I'm going into this with a more \"see what happens\" attitude. I feel like she'd be a cool friend to have but I'd be open to a relationship if, as we got to know each other better, we continued to click on these levels. Would it be creepy if I created an account, threw some content on there and waited a few days to follow her?", "summary": "met a girl, really like her, got her contact info but I don't wanna be off-putting in going about contacting her."}
{"id": "t3_jow5h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need advice: SO has horrible breath", "post": "We're both in our mid-20s and have been together several years. My boyfriend is totally awesome and I love him to pieces. However... he rarely brushes his teeth. (He's otherwise hygienic, so this baffles me.)\n\nThe first time I got the nerve to talk to him about it was a couple months into the relationship. I learned then that he only brushed his teeth a couple times a week. I was horrified, and over a the next few months, I pestered him to brush his teeth more often. Eventually, he got up to brushing his teeth most days. Many months later and more pestering, he was brushing daily, flossing a couple times per week, and usually using mouthwash.\n\nBut lately I've been noticing it again. I can smell his breath from a few feet away. It's gross to kiss him. I've had to interrupt foreplay a few times and ask him to go brush. Sometimes I outright refuse to kiss him until he brushes. He's always annoyed and a bit mad when I do that, but in my opinion, he should know by now that he needs to brush his damn teeth.\n\nI feel like this is ridiculous; I shouldn't have to tell him several times a week to brush his teeth. I thought my refusing to kiss him and/or interrupting foreplay would be enough, but this still happens on a fairly regular basis. What can I do to get my point across? I'm tired of acting like his mom on this.", "summary": "Boyfriend has horrible breath and brushes infrequently, despite me asking him often to brush his teeth. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3a4pq0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18/M] Having issues with self-confidence, dating, and an ex", "post": "So, I'm an 18 year old male, and I've had a few relationships, longest one lasting 2 years, and that one ended towards the end of my sophomore year. However, almost all of my relationships have been me dating someone I've been friends with for a while prior to so I've never had the whole classic dating experiance. That being said, I've also almost never asked a girl just plain and squarely out. I've almost always thought it would be creepy if I, as a random dude, saw a cute girl at a mall and just gave her my number, despite having had girls do this to me at least twice in my life now. \n\nAs odd as it may sound, I just have no idea whatsoever how to go about it. I've had a case recently where I saw a girl I really wanted to try and give my number to, but I just couldn't build up the courage to do so. \n\nI'm just asking for advice and how do other people do this? It's a concept I've never had to do.", "summary": "Just an 18 year old who has never had to ask a random girl doesn't know how to, despite wanting to needing advice on how to."}
{"id": "t3_eqatp", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Traveling decision (Cockatiel care)", "post": "I have two cockatiels, one of which is very old, pushing 18 years of age. She is very fragile and very care intensive. She is unable to sleep on a perch anymore, so she usually sleeps in a soft pillow-lined box draped in towels with a number of soft socks and scarves to cuddle up in. I have a cage for her to stay in, but I feel like I'm punishing her if I lock her up in it. \n\nI'm leaving for a graduation trip to another city for the New Years (about an 8 day stay) and I do not really want to take the birds on a 12 hour drive across country. Unfortunately, the only people I trust to proved proper care for the birds (especially my elderly bird) are my parents who are also going on the trip with me. \n\nI'm forced to leave my feathered friends with a companion of ours from school, I trust him as he has been a pet-sitter for a number of other friends and promises to take good care of them, but I am still uncomfortable about leaving my Elderly bird with him. I'm not sure if he will know how to handle her being scared or what to do if she needs some attention...\n\nUnfortunately, my only options are: Leave both birds with him and hope everything goes well, or take the Care intensive bird with me on the 12 hour trip to stay in a hotel room while I go with my family. \nI am afraid the bird will feel I've abandoned her, get depressed and die before I have a chance to come back. What should I do?", "summary": "I am going on an 8 day vacation, not sure if I should take my 18 year-old very fragile cockatiel with me or leave her with a family friend. What would you choose?"}
{"id": "t3_1aryy9", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "A new idea for staying in my exercise routine", "post": "I am a person who enjoys smoking weed and drinking beer. I am also a person who enjoys swimming biking running jumping and lifting weights. I've found that if I allow myself to smoke or drink on days when I haven't exercised, I risk getting lazy the next day and avoiding exercise that day as well.\n\nIn order to prevent myself from slacking on my exercise routine I've started forbidding myself to enjoy a drink or a smoke on any day that I haven't already busted my ass exercising. I think this concept can help others: it's fine to reward yourself for working hard.", "summary": "If you haven't yet exercised today, don't let yourself have that beer that you're craving until you get out and burn a couple calories."}
{"id": "t3_v0vpn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend's Google history shows that he is looking for Glory Holes, what should I do?", "post": "I'm 20f and he is 19m. So basically I looked at my boyfriend's Google search history (I know, I know) and I stumbled across \"glory holes\", he read forums about them and ended up looking for \"glory holes IN [our city's name]. I told him what I found and he said he was just \"being curious\", but why is he THAT curious to look for specific locations of glory holes? I don't know what do to. I don't think he would ever go to one but it scares me anyways. We have had issues with our sex life recently and I think he may be looking for other outlets. What should I do? What should I think?", "summary": "Boyfriend's Google history shows that he is looking for local glory holes, he says it is just \"curiosity\", should I believe him?"}
{"id": "t3_3lfi8p", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Not counting calories this time. Anyone else? 110kg - 76kg - 93kg.", "post": "Hey guys, I was wondering if there is anyone else on here who isn't counting calories? What has been your experience with this? Advice? Positives and negatives!?\n\nBackground: I used to weigh 110kgs (242.5 lbs) and at my lowest I was at 76kg (167 lbs). That wasn't something I was able to maintain. My calorie count was 1400, I did cardio every day for 45mins to an hour, and I weighed myself everyday. \n\nBUT some days I would only eat 900 calories (not often but it's never a good idea IMO) and beat myself up about the scales. Basically, I was starting to get obsessed with the numbers.\n\nI ended up with a knee injury and stomach issues so I had to pull back on the exercise. I also entered a new relationship and didn't want to count calories constantly. So between these two factors, I've put on weight.\n\nThis time around I don't want to count calories and I want to keep my exercise in check (my knee is just... done...). I've set a goal of losing 10kgs in 5 months (totally do-able!) and am just trying to focus on planning out my meals, looking at making healthy choices, exercising in a non-debilitating way  and not beating myself up for having dessert.\n\nMy aim is to make this a sustainable habit, which - for me - calorie counting is not. I think as a short-term, get-the-ball-rolling type of thing calorie counting is great but I'm now viewing it as 'phase one'. It has introduced an awareness around nutrition and portions. And physical activity is now part of my lifestyle (I have a treadmill desk where I aim to walk ten thousand steps per day).\n\nI started on Monday and have lost 0.5kgs thus far, so it seems to be working.\n\nIs anyone else forgoing calorie counting? How's it working out for you?", "summary": "was counting calories and exercising like a demon, realised it was unsustainable for me and am trying to lose weight without calorie counting. Interested in other's experiences/advice."}
{"id": "t3_44xvim", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "So glad I dodged an emotionally abusive relationship. I'm not even sad anymore.", "post": "I always try to see the best in people, and I'll admit that it takes 2 people to make a relationship fail as it does to make one work.  \n\nAfter weeks and weeks of my ex not knowing if he wanted to be wth me, and in the last couple weeks his ex became a factor, I finally let go and set him free to find out what he wants because I didn't want to get in the way of his happiness. \n\nIn hindsight, I realize this was the best move I made. He has a lot of baggage due to family issues as well as past relationships, and though I genuinely appreciate him as a person, I got fed up with letting him project his issues onto me.  \n\nI have baggage too so I would never belittle someone else's baggage, but I'm strong enough to know that how you treat others is a choice, not an excuse or explanation for your pain.", "summary": "I am not one to let my past define me and I am so glad I got myself out of a relationship with someone who lets the past define him."}
{"id": "t3_yp0p8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO's [M 25] constant self-pitying is becoming a major problem for me [F 26].", "post": "I guess what I am mainly looking for is some advice for how I can help him (age 25) cope or how I (age 26) can be supportive without getting annoyed/frustrated. I personally try to always be grateful and look for the best in situations.\n\nWhen my fiance and I met he was working a job he wasn't thrilled with (I think most of us can relate).  His employers were very shady and encouraged unethical business practices.  The entire year he was working there he was searching for a new job so I was glad to see that he was not just complaining, but taking action to rectify the situation.\n\nHowever after taking a stand against the employer's requests to cheat people out of money, they told him to hit the road.\n\nHe job searched for several more months complaining the whole time that there are \"no good jobs where we live\" which is partially true if you ask me, but I encouraged him to take anything to pay the bills since crappy income is better than no income.  \n\nFinally it got to a point where he needed health insurance and was \"forced\" to start working at a family business as a last result (His parents are in the middle of a divorce because his Dad cheated so he has a horrible relationship with his father).\n\nNow he comes home miserable every night with a \"woe is me\" pouty face on and barely wants to talk.  When I push him to talk about what's bothering him he says \"You know my situation, I'm miserable in my job...\"  It doesn't help that he's making no extra money beyond what's necessary to pay his bills.\n\nNow I want to be sympathetic since I know what it's like to get up each day and do something you hate, but at the same time there is only so much pity-party observing I can take.  \n\nOther relevant info: We are planning to move across the country in about 4 months for a transfer with my job so he doesn't want to start something new for that short amount of time.  \n\nAnyway, how do I help get him out of his funk or how do I keep his miserable mood from making me constantly miserable as well?", "summary": "Fiance hasn't been happy with his job/career situation since we've began dating and it's affecting his attitude so much that it's starting to take a toll on our relationship (from my point of view)."}
{"id": "t3_4i22lg", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Ontario, Canada] Abandoned Property (busted car)", "post": "Hello,\n\nMy relative sold a car to someone over the phone. This person sent a money order (that cleared and deposited fine). However, part of the verbal agreement is they had to come get the car. The car is in horrible shape, pictures were shown to the person who bought it before the sale. Many months have gone by and this person still says they will get to it. \n\nWe are convinced he won't and we want it gone.\n\nI want to send him a \"x\" day notice to come get it or we will resell it or trash it. \n\nI figured I would send a registered mail letter to the return address on the money order saying you have 30days to come get the car, ignoring this and failing to get the car will result in forfeiture of the item and no refund.\n\nAm I missing something here or does my plan sound solid? Is it even necessary?\n\nWhenever I google this issue I mostly find people talking about abandoned cars with no owner, or tenants who've abandoned their apartment.\n\nThanks for your time.", "summary": "Someone bought a car, paid, hasn't picked it up, we want it gone in any fashion that's civil, no refunds."}
{"id": "t3_415ti8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my 3 mth [17 F] Broke up would you attend ex's birthday?", "post": "Broke up as she was confused about the relationship, started getting quite distant etc. Should say it was kind of a rebound relationship, however both our feelings were genuine and at least for the first 2 months we did want to make it work. She has had no contact with that ex since their split (too much hurt feelings between the two).\n\nFast forward a few weeks and she's sending messages again saying she wants things to go back to normal and be friends. She's wanting to hang out alot, i've declined three times, but did meet up to go christmas shopping. It was a little awkward and the hug at the end was... not friendly, very awkward. \n\nNow a few weeks after this, she wants me to attend her birthday (sent me a facebook invite and a message) just hoping i can come.\n\nShould also add that she has a new 'friend', who im supposed to know nothing about but unfortunately my friend knows him. He has also been invited, but god only knows if they are in a relationship (i have never asked, as i should not really know). \n\nNow as i'm on here, you can tell i still have feelings for her, but if you were in my position, what would you do? Bearing in mind i only know her and a mutual friend, the rest of the people i don't have a clue who they are. \n\nWhy on earth would a woman want to remain friends with a 3 month relationship (with whom she went distant from)? Should also note it's not alot of communication, it's literally maybe once a week or two since our split 4 months ago (yes 4 MONTHS...)", "summary": "Would you attend an ex's birthday? Bearing in mind i still have feelings but don't wanna get back with her. Also i only know her and a mutual friend."}
{"id": "t3_3ctv5u", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being a racist 14 year old", "post": "So for some back story, I was in my first year of highschool and all I did was sit at home and watch various YouTube channels (I had no life). I was very socially awkward and never knew what to say when made fun of or when something unexpected happened. So here I am in math class on my phone watching FilthyFrank. My teacher was fairly strict and ends up taking my phone and sending me to the front of the class. Now.... Our school has many types of foreign exchanges every year, students from all over the world come to our school. So trying to make light of the situation thinking that people will understand my filthy frank reference, I said \"JEEZ IT SURE SMELLS LIKE PAKISTAN UP HERE\". Funny right? False. Everyone looks shocked, so I look around and notice that there are three students sitting behind me. 2 of which are wearing turbans.", "summary": "immature 14 year old (me) got sent to front of class. Said it smells like Pakistan, 2 students with turbans behind me"}
{"id": "t3_koqmh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is a sub-$800 camera that can shoot high quality video ideal for music video-like appearances?", "post": "[This is a video of what we're trying to achieve.](\n\nMy school currently has a Sony HVR-HD1000u, and compared to that, our videos are nowhere near as good. I understand that things like lighting and color correction play a pretty big role, but even then I feel like our videos are never that clean. I usually can't get 720p clips out of our camera and the slow motion that they have is something we can't even come close to.\n\nOne possible *problem* is that for some reason we can't use firewire to connect the camera to the computer so we have to play the tape on this thing that basically plays it and then we capture the tape playing. I feel like this is probably a huge problem because it's like trying to show a friend a movie by screen-capping from Skype.\n\nSO, should we scrap the HVR-HD1000u and get a Canon T2i (a cheaper DSLR which from the samples I've seen on YouTube and clips from that video, seems pretty high quality), or continue trying to use the Sony?", "summary": "To get music video quality, would it be better to use our Sony HVR-HD1000u or buy a Canon T2i? Or something else entirely (<$800)?"}
{"id": "t3_zoy3j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Best friend started getting really flirty with me, but she's in a relationship M20 F20", "post": "So, my best friend, who I've had a crush on for about 2 years, has started getting really flirty with me. There are a couple of reasons why this is weird to me.\n\nFirst, we've been friends for about 3 years, and has never seemed interested in me. When I first told her about my crush on her, she got really distant, and it took a while just to be comfortable around her again, but now our relationship is as strong as ever.\n\nSecond, she's really involved with another guy, who I personally think is below her standards. However, I try and stay out of the relationship as much as possible and just let them do their thing. However, she has gotten more and more flirty with me as she has been dating this guy.\n\nShe is very, very uncomfortable with touching other people, but recently (as in last weekend), began to put her arm on my shoulder, tickle me, hit me playfully, and is allowing me to do the same. This morning in class, i was tickling her, and she was perfectly fine. Then another of her friends put their hand on her shoulder to ask her a question, and she freaked out.\n\nI've also noticed that she has started talking really quietly around me, forcing me to move my head in closer so I can hear her. When I do this, she flits her eyes between my eyes and my lips. I've also caught her looking at me from across the room quiet often, and even though we are good friends, she looks away as if she's really shy or embarrassed.\n\nI think she may be developing a crush on me, but maybe I'm just becoming really close with her, and she is just becoming more comfortable with me. Any thoughts? Also, if it becomes obvious that she does indeed have feelings for me, is it appropriate to make a move while she is with this other guy (their relationship is about 7 months now)?", "summary": "Old friend is being really flirty with me. The feeling is definitely mutual, but shes in a serious relationship with someone else. How should I respond?"}
{"id": "t3_1b9j0y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Want to repair a relationship with my father ..", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nI have always had a rough relationship with my father. I am a 30/m.  We haven't communicated well with each other over the years and have had many, many falling outs leading to rude remarks. We haven't seen eye to eye on issues over the years.  He's an explosive person, and so am I.  You can say I am just like him in some ways.. \n\nI honestly don't know how to have a good father-son relationship.  I can say that whatever relationship I have with my dad is the same relationship he had with his father.  Not sure if this is a factor? \n\nAny advice from you nice people?", "summary": "Bad relationship with dad over the years, want to repair.  Don't really know how to. Never had a strong father son relationship before and don't know what that feels like."}
{"id": "t3_tcd52", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what are some situations from childhood where you went to great lengths and stress to hide something from parents/teachers, only for it to be way less of a big deal than you thought?", "post": "When I was 9, my dad never recycled anything our huge laserjet churned out.\n\nThe computer room was part of my bedroom. One night I was on a cot near the computer since I had a friend sleeping over in my bed. I got up to pee, but being unfamiliar with the new bed, couldn't find the door in the dark. I panicked, and just peed against the nearest wall. I turned on a desk lamp and saw that I'd pissed all over my dad's precious pile of printer paper. And the wall. And carpet. I was sure he'd be furious. Since he was saving those papers, and this was his office, I figured they must be important documents.\n\nWith piss-stained pyjamas (I couldn't change because I didn't want to risk waking up my friend by opening the closet), I frantically cleaned up my piss and tried to copy by hand all the text on those pages onto new paper with a pencil. But there was no hiding the fact that I'd pissed all over several hundred pages of white paper.\n\nI gave up and went to bed crying, struggling to keep quiet because my friend was a few feet away and I didn't want to wake him and see what I'd done.\n\nMy dad never noticed the next morning, my stomach in knots. Months went by, until we were moving to a new house. He picked up the pile of papers while packing, I froze. He said it looked like they'd gotten water damage somehow. He shrugged, and threw them all in the trash without ever bothering to save any of the information on them. All worthless. FML.\n\nI still recycle paper frequently due to the scar this left.", "summary": "9 year old me accidentally pissed all over a pile of my dad's \"important documents\", found out months later they were just garbage."}
{"id": "t3_4y7awc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my coworker [26 M] 1 year, I have a crush on my coworker", "post": "So I got my first job about a year ago now. And one of my coworkers started a few months before me. I was a bit weary of him at first because he seemed stuck up, but I was forced to interact with him during a travel day together. I had a blast. He even gave me his personal number. \n\nSo a few months go by and we end up hanging out a few times. The second time we spent at my apartment. He cooked me dinner (salmon stuffed with lobster, homemade mashed potatoes and baked veggies - not an easy meal and he bought it all) and then he did the dishes, gave me a back rub and cuddled with me on the couch while we watched a movie. I had a really good night and it seemed like he had fun too (hugged me a few times before he left)\n\nI wasn't expecting anything to come of it but I enjoy his company and would like to see him more. We spent some more time with each other but nothing more happened. I was okay with that as long as I got to see him, as a friend. Now though, he wont respond to my messages about hanging out. He responds to other ones but not those. I don't think I did anything to upset him as conversation about other things goes very well. I know he's busy being a sales person, but I'd like to see him. I thought we were going to hang out last weekend but he suddenly became cold and said he was busy. \n\nI know I have a crush on him because him becoming cold and distant hurts my feelings. I think he's a great guy and fun to be around and even if he doesn't reciprocate my crush feelings, I could see us being good friends.", "summary": "I like my coworker, but either he is super busy or doesn't like me enough to even be my friend. Should I pursue him/try to be friends outside of work or am I reading this all wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_1eziok", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Pain in the side of my leg during and after a jog", "post": "Alright- So I'm doing the c25k thing and have been at it for three weeks now. Today was w3 d3. So last Friday (w2 d3) my jog resulted in this sort of tight pain\" up the side of my left leg, not on top of my shin but on the outside of the leg, sort of like a cramp. Now I stretch before and after every run, so I'm not sure what was going on. I didn't really do anything for it, figuring it would go away but it took three days, a few ice packs and finally a heat pad to get it to stop. \n\nSo Monday, I go for my run and it's back. Not too horrible but there. the runs are longer this week (3 minutes) and my jogging pace that day was barely a jog. I come home stick my leg in the Jacuzzi for 20 minutes and the pain is gone. same on Wednesday. \n\nToday I'm doing my run, going a bit faster than I was before, and the pain comes back. While I'm jogging, it's just small twinges, but when I slow to my walk it comes back with a vengeance. I figure for some reason I'm not allowing my ankle a full range of motion, so I try to relax and walk normally, but the pain gets worse and worse and worse. - I end the run, stretch out again get in my car and it disappears for the most part. It still feels tight in that whole area, but no real pain anymore. \n\nDoes anyone at all experience this?, is there a special stretch I should be doing. I bought some kinesiology tape, but I don't think I put it on the right place.", "summary": "Tight Pain running from the top of my ankle up the outside of my calf, gets worse when I walk after a run, and heat makes it go away- any stretching or other advice for it."}
{"id": "t3_vnedq", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Quick question! not sure which path to take....", "post": "If your here to say \" move on\" dont bother commentating thats not what im asking for..\n\n26 (m) and dated 26(F) for 4 years.\n\nBasically at the beginning of the relationship i was the one always going out of my way to show affection. And over the past 6 months its been her showing affection and i really didnt..\nI did still love her i just was a moron and didnt show it i guess..\n\nAnyways i broke up with her a few weeks ago and she was heartbroken.. she keeps saying she wanted to get married..\nI asked for her back and she says she cant date me anymore because i hurt her to much..\nShe says not to wait for her.. and to lose all hope.\n\nI KNOW she is still in love with me and i really want her back.\n\nQuestion is do i give her space and time and give her the silent treatment kind of thing.. or do i go out of my way to keep showing her i deserve a second chance.. ( yes i will treat her the way she deserves and show her)\n\nWhats the best way to get her back?", "summary": "Broke up, she still loves me but says she cant date me again beause i hurt her to much.. "}
{"id": "t3_fevcw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Facebook is holding my PERSONAL account ransom because I disputed $3,000 worth of advertising that never happened. Isn't this blackmail?", "post": "So I created an ad on Facebook for a new business that I'm trying to get off the ground. I started at $100/day. 3 days later I've got $3,000 worth of charges on my debit card. \n\nI called Facebook to ask them what was going on and they basically didn't want to hear a word I had to say. Their whole attitude was \"deal with it\". My new business received NO new traffic from them during the time when the ads were supposed to have been active (and I've got the analytics data to prove it) let alone **$3,000** worth! I disputed the credit card charges with my bank.\n\nSo what did Facebook do? They deactivated my PERSONAL Facebook account. Don't get me wrong, I'm not someone who thinks that Facebook is the only thing to do online, but it does have merit. I had (have?) something like 700 Facebook friends and losing track of them would be a true-to-life bummer.\n\nI called Facebook again asking about the deactivation of my account and they said (summarized), \"Remove the disputes for the charges and we will reinstate your personal account.\" FUCK YOU!\n\nI am comparatively NOT concerned about my personal Facebook account compared with 3 grand and I don't see why they're doing either of these things, but I'd like more input.\n\nWhat say you, reddit? Is this blackmail? Have any of you dealt with Facebook in this capacity? Are there any tips/tricks/sites you could recommend?", "summary": "Advertised on Facebook. What should have been $300 ended up being $3,000. I received NO benefit. I disputed credit card charges. Facebook deactivated my personal account."}
{"id": "t3_v9fur", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have you ever been furious when confronting somebody and left feeling bad for them?", "post": "I will start this off with what recently happened to me. A car pulled out in front of me on a highway from the driveway of a store without looking. I didn't have enough time to stop but luckily our cars just bumped. After  checking that everybody in the car was ok I got out to check the damage (there was none) and talk to the other driver. It was a little old lady who was leaving Sears after buying a black dress for the funeral of a family member. She immediately started crying, apologizing and asking if I had any children in the car. Because there was no damage we parted ways, and I went from being furious with somebody causing an accident to feeling bad for her.", "summary": "Little old lady caused an accident (no damage/injuries) left feeling bad for her instead of being mad. "}
{"id": "t3_2n68b3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/f] My friend is in love with a guy [20/m] she haven't met and it's ruining her life.", "post": "My friend has been in a relationship for 2 years with a guy she met online on Tumblr. They've known each other for 4 years now but they still haven't met outside of Skype calls, and other online chat service. It's ruining her life. She's constantly crying and complaining about how much this guy messes up. She's always getting drunk because of something stupid this guy did, and I'm always there to pick her up for it. She always get drunk just to get even with him, and at one point she would cheat on him. Honestly, it happened more than once (happened 4 times, with 4 different guys) but for some crazy reason, they are still together. I asked her why she's still with him and she says \"It's cause he's hot\". And on not so rare occasions she would say \"If you love someone you'll fix your problems\". But is it really worth it? For a guy you still haven't met? How can I help my friend at least be happy. Whether they break up or not is not a concern for me. What matters is that she stops crying and stop making bad decisions. Also out of the 4 guys she's cheated on him with, she's still talking to him. The guy goes out of his way to help her. He likes her, and I know it's bad on his part but this guy cares more than her boyfriend does. He even baked her a cake and got her a gift for her birthday while travelling 2 hours just to drop it off. While her boyfriend wouldn't even greet her a happy birthday. It's honestly terrible seeing my friend friendzone a guy that deserves it much more. I don't know the situation completely, but I would love to hear a general opinion based on what guys have seen. Thank you. :)", "summary": "Friend is in a relationship with a dude, and it's ruining her life. She's friend zoning another guy cause she's clinging onto her current LDR."}
{"id": "t3_3kksvz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (37M) boyfriend is addicted to PC Gaming and it's starting to seem like he no longer cares about me (26F) or our child.", "post": "My Boyfriends and I have been together for 3 years. He has always been a gamer. I have too although most of my gaming days were before my son was born. I understand that it's his way to unwind from work. There's this one game he's started playing two months ago with some other guy he met online and since he's started playing, it's like I don't exist. He doesn't want to do anything with me our or son. I've even come home late at night and come back to find our 2 year old still awake at 10:00 pm because he forgot him on the couch. He has a second son that he doesn't pay much attention to either because of his gaming addictions.\n\nThe only time he comes to me is if he wants sex...but I just feel so neglected by him that I'm never in the mood for that. And when I do it, it's just because I feel obligated to him. I've told him that I feel he's spending too much time playing that game, and I've even brought up couples counselling. He's not interested in any of it. And when I try to have a serious conversation he just shuts down and has this poker face displayed so I have no idea what he's thinking, and he never responds to me after these conversations. \n\nI have anxiety issues and depression and with him being so into this game, I feel like he doesn't care about the relationship anymore, and it's just causing me to sink further into my depression.\n\nI don't want to leave him. We have a son together. Also, even though I work, I don't make enough to financially support myself and my son. I'm going to school for the bachelors degree a couple evenings during the week but I am still a few years away from completing that. \n\nAt this point, I feel lost and I don't know what to do. I don't want to stop him from gaming, but I feel like he needs to also focus on his family more.", "summary": "My boyfriend is addicted to PC gaming. I feel like I've tried everything I can to reach out to him and I don't know what else to do. Can someone offer me some advice on the situation?"}
{"id": "t3_4t7o9g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24F] father [57M] needs a kidney and I won't give him one", "post": "To make a long story short, my father is a classic narcissist with a long list of symptoms, which makes this even more complicated. He believes he knows more than doctors and that they're just \"out to get your money\". He's nuts. This ties into him not managing his diabetes like it's recommended and not caring for his feet (he's had two toes and their metatarsals removed because of this). He also smokes two packs a day, has heart disease (& a history of heart attacks), and is overweight. He also hasn't worked in about a decade (for no real reason). \n\nRecently it's come out that his kidney disease is getting bad. To the point where the doctor believes he's going to need a kidney transplant in the near future. Due to his poor life choices, he'll never be eligible for a donor kidney. It would have to be a private transplant. Of the family, I am the only one that is his blood type. He has no friends. \n\nThere is no way I want to give him a kidney. He's absolutely awful, especially to me and my mother. He's been abusive in the past. Besides that, there's no way he'd ever take care of it, he'd continue his same poor health habits. I'd be throwing my kidney into a dumpster. \n\nI live at home as I'm currently in school (2 years to go). I already avoid him as much as possible, but I know that he would resent me if I refused to give him my kidney and those tensions would make the household even worse. He'll hold a grudge for decade. As much as I would love to go no contact, I am at home til school is done and I'd still have to see him on holidays with the family. I don't even know if I'm a tissue match and I'm terrified to find out. My mother is supportive of me not donating a kidney, but is at a loss for how to explain it to him. \n\nWhat do I do? How do I keep my kidneys while maintaining the peace?", "summary": "My narcissictic father needs one of my kidneys and I won't give him one. How do I explain that without him exploding since I'll live at home for another two years?"}
{"id": "t3_2dt6wr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] am in my first serious relationship with my [18F] girlfriend of 4 months and I think I'm out of the honeymoon period so I'v just got some questions.", "post": "So I met my girlfriend earlier this year. We were actually friends originally which is good because I find her interesting on an intellectual level and not just attractive.\n\nI'm not going to go into detail but after a while we decided to start dating and after a few dates we happily became a couple.\n\nWe are still very happy, but at the beginning it was such an insane high, I remember on our first date I felt sick from emotions and first time doing anything sexually we couldn't keep our hands off eachother.  \n\nNow things have finally came down and there's more of a comfortable feeling than a high of butterflies and etc.\n\nI understand that its biologically impossible to be on such a high 24/7 and I do still get the odd case of butterflies so there's nothing to worry about but I'm just wondering is this all normal? \n\nI'v never been in a serious relationship before, only short high school ones so I don't have much experience after this far into a relationship (if it is far at all) \n\nWhat can I do to make things interesting so we still get the odd rush? \n\nIs this all normal?\n\nWhat pros come after the honeymoon phase? (I'v noticed Im not as worried about what I say/how I look now in front of her now)\n\nDoes anybody have any advice for a couple who have just ended there honeymoon phase?", "summary": "I think I'm just after ending the honeymoon phase in my first relationship and I'm wondering is what I'm feeling all normal?"}
{"id": "t3_2ifmha", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23] girlfriend [20] doesn't want me to be in the delivery room when my sister [25] gives birth. How do we get past this?", "post": "My sister is giving birth in a few months and she's asked me to be there when she delivers. Her boyfriend has left her, she has very few friends and doesn't get along with our parents. I feel like I'm the only one she has.\n\nI was happy to be there when she delivers, but unfortunately my girlfriend doesn't feel the same way. She says it's weird and this was something we were meant to share. \n\nRecent text messages:\n\n\"I'm always going to be last. I'm never going to be anyone's first option.\"\n\n\"Was she there to support you the past year when you needed motivation? Was she there when you were stressed?\"\n\nI love my girlfriend but I'm not backing down on this, unless I'm completely wrong, am I wrong?", "summary": "Sister wants be to be there when she gives birth. Girlfriend threatening to break up (indirectly) if we do."}
{"id": "t3_1v6voa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22/F] have been with my boyfriend [27/M] for almost 2 years. I feel like his porn habits have started causing problems in our sex life. How do I bring it up?", "post": "Here's what's up:\n\nOver the last ~4 months, my boyfriend I have barely been sexually active. My drive hasn't changed at all, but he stopped initiating and probably 90% of the time will turn me down when I initiate. After a month or two I finally asked him what was going on, and he explained that the medication he's been taking has lowered his libido.\n\nI accepted that explanation and tried to back off a little, so that he wouldn't feel like I was putting too much pressure on him or being insensitive to the situation. Nothing changed as far as how often we were having sex, but I felt better at least knowing why it was happening.\n\nFast forward to a conversation we had yesterday, where he happened to let it slip that he's been jacking off to porn everyday while I'm at work. I know he's had problems over-using porn in the past (he's told me as much himself.) I really feel like this is a huge part, if not all, of the current problem, more so than his meds since he's apparently still getting horny.\n\nHow do I voice this concern reasonably? I'm afraid it will come off like I'm insecure or jealous of him looking at other girls and he won't take it seriously, or that he'll feel like I'm trying to forbid him from watching porn and will just get defensive.", "summary": "I think my boyfriend is choosing fapping to internet porn over having sex with me. How do I talk to him about it?"}
{"id": "t3_4h9b2j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] and boyfriend [23M]. Is this just sexual incompatibility?", "post": "I will keep it short. My boyfriend often lets things get in the way of having sex: his mood, stress, being tired. I feel like I do this too, but never to this extent. He will have a long day at work and be too tired for sex. He will be feeling sad one day (he had depression) and will be not in the mood. \n\nYesterday we got a hotel room because we had flown out to his home town to visit family. We had started getting intimate but we had to cut it short before we actually got to have sex because we had dinner plans with his friend from high school. He hadn't spoken to this friend for years, and the dinner didn't go super well. He was really excited for the dinner but during the dinner it was clear that he and his friend had really grown apart and had nothing at all in common. It was awkward \n\nAfterwards we get back to the hotel and he's too disappointed with how dinner went to have sex with me. \n\nI try to be understanding because I know how awful it is to be pressured for sex when you don't want it, but I also feel really unsatisfied. What do I do? Are we just incompatible?", "summary": "boyfriend is OFTEN not in the mood for sex for one reason or another.  Are we just incompatible or is there something I can do"}
{"id": "t3_11s7no", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the most amazing thing you've ever experienced?", "post": "Mine is probably not that great in comparison to what I'm sure other people have experienced, but whatever. It was a pretty amazing experience for me. This spring our dog went missing when she got spooked and slipped her collar. She instantly went into \"survival mode\" and although we had a few sightings, she did not recognize anyone or anything from being so out of sorts and was pretty much acting like a wild animal. She was missing in the woods for 2 1/2 days. After we had tried pretty much everything else to catch her, we realized that we'd have to wait for her to approach us. I sat in the middle of a freezing cold, soaking wet hay field with a bowl of food and just waited for her to get brave/hungry enough to approach me. \n\nAfter about an hour and a half, she cautiously made her way toward me. She stopped about 10 feet away from me and started barking aggressively, trying to scare me off of the food. At this point I started to softly and calmly talk to her and slowly held out a piece of steak. I was scared SHITLESS, by the way; my own Great Dane was barking aggressively at me and I only had one chance to grab her when she got close enough...I legitimately thought she was going to sink her teeth into my arm when I tried.\n\nAs she reached out to grab the steak from my hand, the most amazing thing happened. I watched as, within a split second, her eyes went from totally empty to recognizing who I was. I have never seen an animal so clearly have a moment of total relief and utter happiness. I swear, if someone had been filming the encounter it would be the key scene in a sappy dog movie. (Not to mention I was bawling and babbling incoherently while she was jumping 6 feet in the air licking my face).", "summary": "Lost my dog, she freaked out and forgot who I was, then realized who I was right before she was about to chomp on me and totally freaked from happiness."}
{"id": "t3_q2avs", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is your most embarrassing sexual encounter? (NSFW)", "post": "Fortunately, none of my \"encounters\" have been embarrassing, but one of my close friends just recently ended up going home with a girl from a club. They were both trashed and after they finished, he left her dorm room in order to go to the bathroom. Unfortunately, he was on the girls floor so he couldn't use the bathroom. He preceded to leave the floor not realizing the door locks behind him. He ended up pissing on the stairwell and waited there for hours until someone would let him in (all his stuff was in her room and she was passed out). The next day, he learns she left her tampon in and had to go to the doctors because it was stuck. Reddit, what is your most embarrassing story?", "summary": "my friend hooked up with this girl, locked him self out, pissed on the stairs, and learned she left her tampon in after the fact. your most embarrassing story?"}
{"id": "t3_c7ha5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is an English major a bad way to go?", "post": "I've heard that no matter what you do with an English major there's no way to make decent pay. \n\nI've decided I want to be a published author, or a successful enough writer to make a living off of it. I hear it's hard, and I want to improve my writing. My parents are telling me I have to attend college otherwise they can't afford insurance. From experience is it best to pursue your writing in college, or set yourself off in a solid-pay job starting out on your own? \n\nI'm by no means asking for anyone to decide for me, but I feel like I'm wasting money in college, and reading/writing are the only things I enjoy besides movies/plays/video games. I'll take everything with a grain of salt, but even writing tips would be helpful. I hate working and love stimulating my mind. I think constantly which makes work torturous. *I don't want to be rich, I want to live happy and pursue things that interest me.", "summary": "or summarized/coherent version: Can I make a living on my writing, and what's the best way to improve it?"}
{"id": "t3_3kjm7y", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Question for Anyone in the Field of Software Quality Assurance", "post": "Do you guys like your jobs? Does you have job satisfaction?\n\n I found myself working a project where I do a lot of manual quality assurance and have been doing it for about the past year. This wasn't the work I chose to do (I was actually hired on as a BA and did that for about the first month of the project). I enjoy QA sometimes but I find it hard to talk about my job to others (I think that is common amongst the IT profession). I also am not a fan of upsetting people and I'm still working on my delivery method for \"YOUR CODE FAILED. FIX IT.\". \n\nBeing in the oil and gas industry I felt as if I could lose my job at any time so I have been sending out 'feeler' resumes on Indeed and one thing led to another and now I am at the second round interview for a job that could pay at least $7,000 more each year.  However, I know that once I take this job (If I want to maintain my salary and not go back to school) I know that QA will be my career. \n\nSo should I do it? Does anyone out there regret being a manual software tester? \n\nP.S - I'm an MIS major and I have taken a couple of programming classes. I'm not sure how hard it would be to learn to created automated programming scripts, but I feel like I would need more training to accomplish that.", "summary": "Started working as a BA. Got assigned QA work. Sent out resumes for QA jobs. Currently in interview for a job that pays 7k more but I'm worried I wont have job satisfaction. Should I do it?"}
{"id": "t3_1n9lem", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my recent ex [25 M] have a lot of the same friends; how do I hang out with them?", "post": "So me and my ex have a lot of friends that we both know and hang out with. These were people that knew and were friends with him before I stepped in the picture mostly, but some are new that we both met and became friends with. I don't know now that we are broken up if any of our shared friends will want to be with me. I only have a handful of my friends in school still this year; most of them graduated and left for jobs else wheres. I don't know how to spend my weekends. And for almost two years I pretty exclusively met friends through him, despite being apart of a college community, going out and enjoying my personal interests in groups of people with the same interests, and so on.", "summary": "The ex and I broke up, but all of the friends I feel close to were his friends first. How do I enjoy my life, if they all turn away from me? Will they turn away from me? Am I paranoid?"}
{"id": "t3_2u0li8", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting a new phone.", "post": "To start this off, I must say that I come from a fairly conservative home, where my parents believe that their now 20-year-old son is a saint of sorts. I have spent the last 2 years studying away from home, so naturally some self discovery and experimentation is to be expected. Recently got a contract upgrade from my cellular service provider and decided to give my mom my old phone, thinking I had deleted all things suspicious and incriminating. Little did I know that when she re-downloaded whatsapp, it would revert to my account, bringing back all my contacts, groups and conversations. She was not pleased by some of the reading material she uncovered. I never delete my chats, because ain't nobody got time for that. So she pretty much had access to every conversation I'd had in the last 2 years. Guys, a lot has happened in 2 years. None of which they were supposed to know about. A rude awakening for my mom at first. You can imagine how I was shaking with fear when she confronted me about this. Imagine your mom finding out everything you ever wanted to hide from her, in a single evening.", "summary": "my parents found out about the LSD, shrooms, weed smoking, excessive drinking and unprotected sex I have been having away from home."}
{"id": "t3_211i5v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (23F) with ex (23M), together 4 years, apart 4 months. Feeling upset about interaction with ex.", "post": "Me and my ex broke up mid december, we had been fighting quite a bit the month before and we were both very stressed out from school. He broke up with me cause he felt that our relationship wasn't beneficial to each other anymore and that things just weren't the same between us. \n\nIt's been a maybe 4 months now and we haven't talked much at all (he completely blocked me from everything). He is seeing a girl that he's had class with for awhile and I'm dating too. The other day thought he unexpected showed up at my apartment with a package that had accidentally been delivered to his apartment. I was really surprised that he showed up to give me it cause when ever we have decided to met for any reason since the breakup he insist we meet in a public place. He didn't stay for long and he seemed to keep his distance from me (like trying to stand as far as way as possible). We had a good interaction nothing eventful in anyway, but now I'm feeling odd for some reason. \n\nI mean I have been missing him and everything, but have been keeping away form him of course. It just felt very different then any other interaction we have had almost like we were just aquaitence. I don't like the feeling, we were so closed he was my best friend, we shared so much personal, intimate, and emotional stuff. I don't know why this is upsetting me so much but it really is. Of course I want to be friends but this change in the dynamic between us is upsetting and I'm not sure why.", "summary": "had a run in with my ex and feeling upset about how our dynamic is different now, but i'm not sure why."}
{"id": "t3_2cvpay", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26M] with my girlfriend [24F] of 3 years is afraid of losing her job", "post": "Hey reddit.\n\nLove my girl. She graduated from college two years ago, but did get her current job like 3 months ago. The thing is... the field of her profession is very competitive in the country that we live. So she is very afraid of losing her job and be unemployed with all the bills to pay (she lives alone and pay for all her bills, no support for her dad, only I lend some money once in awhile). I felt like that in my first employment, but since there are a lot of open spots in the field that I work, that fear went away very quickly.\n\nHow can I support her in this situation? I always tell her that she is a very talented professional (and she is, indeed), but I'd like to know if anyone has put through the same feeling and if you would like to hear something else. Thanks in advance.", "summary": "girlfriend is afraid of losing her current and first job. How can I confort her that's not going to happen? Or, if it happens, she is safe and will succeed in another job?"}
{"id": "t3_n7mv7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit! I need help with a KFC incident", "post": "Hey guys!\n\nSo about 2 or 3 days ago, a few friends and I were at a nearby KFC when my friend noticed something strange in his meal. Upon having a closer look, he pulled out the \"mystery object\" and it was a feather. A small, white feather was lodged inside his chicken!!! Anyways, we talked to the people working there and they literally acted like it was just something that happens everyday. After a complaint,all they did was give us a free new piece of chicken, which nobody honestly felt like eating any more. After complaining to the manager, we got the same result and they didn't seem to care. So what I ask of you, reddit, is what can we do about this? Could it be proof of animal cruelty or something? However, the problem is that we live in Austria, where lawsuits aren't as common as in America, and people generally don't give a shit about these things. Any advice?", "summary": "me and my friends found a feather in our KFC and we don't know what to do about it. Also, we live in Austria."}
{"id": "t3_4z4r1q", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "How/where to get more clerical and office administrative skills?", "post": "Been volunteering for a local non-profit for about 2 years in the hopes of getting some admin skills to beef up my resume. So far though, I do mostly filing, folding & bundling newsletters at the end of each season, some maintenance here and there. I want/need more experience using computer programs like MS Office and data entry. I've only gotten maybe a few handfuls of computer work in my pocket. The folks where I volunteer are wonderful and I would love it if I could work there. But they seem to have plenty of staff and hiring me is out of their purview. Most computer work is only allowed to the staff. Nothing against them, but I feel like I've wasted the past couple of years there on grunt work.\n\nBeyond typing up college papers on Word and making flyers on Publisher, I've got little practice in MS Office programs. Learning Excel, Acces, mail merge, etc. would be so useful. At a previous non-profit, I learned a bit of html using Wordpress to update their websites. That has withered from disuse. What kind of place can I apply to for office work where the employer wouldn't mind training me? Or are non-profits my only option? If the latter, are there specific kinds that will get me more office work? Mine is part gallery so they need more help outside of the office. Could I take classes somewhere, ideally free?", "summary": "Need more office admin experience. What place will train me? Is volunteering the only way? Classes an option, if so, where and free?"}
{"id": "t3_3lrkga", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20F) finally told my best friend (35M) that I love him", "post": "Me and my best friend have been friends for almost 10 months now, and it has been my best friendship. We talk everyday, he had been my rock, and my confident.  He has had my back through some tough spots, and given me so much advice. A month into our friendship, he told me he didn't think we meshed too well, and probably shouldnt date. I was half way fine with it , because we had started to get intaimate , and i wad fine being Best friends with benefits. \n  Our friendship all this year has had its ups and downs, but we always have greay conversations and sex. But somewhere in this friendship,  I fell in love with him. I have attempted to date , but to no avail, I kept comparing them to my best friend.  But it always worked out bevause he wasn't dating and i could fall back on him. He's a truly amazing man and friend. \n \n\n  To sum up a long post,  he knew I had feelings for him, but told me he didn't share them. Today i told him I loved him and we probably shouldn't be friends anymore.  He told me he didnt want to hurt me anymore , and didn't want to stop being friends,  but it was hurting him too. We talked for hours, i cried and felt terrible. But we got to somewhat better ground. But then he told me, he had a crush on a girl he met two months ago, but it isn't anything more than friends right now.  I trust him,  he's never been dishonest,  and he's always open and forthcoming.  \n\n But im just hurt, and i don't how to get over this, sorry if i rambling.  Im still crying and emotional.", "summary": "I fell in love with my best friend,  and I dont know what to do because he doesn't love me back. But he's a great friend and I dont want to end a friendship over this."}
{"id": "t3_4zskdm", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "How to get two girls, who both like me and are bi, into a threesome?", "post": "So I introduced 2 girls to each other. They hit it off. They are both bisexual. Anyways, they started dating. And on the side, I found out that both like me, and they are both sexually liberal about themselves. So my question, is how do I get into a 3some with the two? \n\nI am not a sleezy douche. I'm just being lost and confused since I'm a virgin. \n\nFirst: How do I bring up the idea of a 3some? I don't know if they know that the other person likes me. \nBoth they do both like me. They told me, separately.  \nAnd if they both agree, how would a 3some work? \n\nI am 20 years male.\nOne girl is 21 years old.\nThe other is 19 years old.\nTheir relationship duration is 2 weeks.", "summary": "I'm a virgin. I introduced two bi girls together. Then I found out both like me. They are sexually liberal. I don't know how to get into a 3some."}
{"id": "t3_3zrdh2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Update] My (27m) best friends (28m) sister(22f) who i saved from her rape keeps makibg advances", "post": "[Original](\n\nBefore i start I would like to thank the people of reddit for the advice i was given.\n\nI went to her this morning to admit my feelings. When i did the longest momebt of silence that ever happened occured. She hugged ne, started crying on my chest, and released all her emotions on me. She said she has loved for a long time and believed that after her attack that i qould see her as dirty, trashy, and used. She feared that because she was quick to give up on herself then i would eventually giv up on her too.\n\nI told her that i would never consider her any of those things and that she could fall as many times as she pleased, but i will always be there to pick her back up. \n\nAfter things settled down we discussed postponning out relationship until shes further down her recovery. Her therapist thinks its best she not have a relationship until shes done with her therapy. She thinks that i am best at helping her recover( other than herself).\n\nI told her famuly this and i was met with sarcasm. \" great job OP, it only took you 4 years\". Her mom said ive had her blessings since sort of, not yet, recovering gf was 18. She grinned as as dad slipped her cash from i assume a bet.\n\nThats pretty much it.", "summary": "Admitted feelings to friends sister. She admitted her's. Postponibg relation ship until her therapy is over. Family was very sarcastic about it."}
{"id": "t3_3l7wkl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] Husband [28M] struggles to get a job and keep it. I read his email and discovered his last job didn't end exactly how he told me", "post": "I met my husband at university when I was 18 and he was 24. We got married straight after. He's great, looks after me and has never cheated.\n\nThe only problem is, he struggles to get work. He has a criminal record and struggles to accept that he can't work in his degree (humanities) field. I did the same degree, but have been busting my balls in sales jobs. \n\nHe was recently working in a call centre, but left for a sales job. I was thrilled- better pay, hours and benefits. He lasted in this sales job for one week. Apparently they didn't think he was up to it, so they got rid of him. He has been very vague about it.\n\nI don't know why I did this, but I went through his emails to try and find out more. It appears that on Monday, the day he got fired, he pulled a sicky to telling his boss he had to look after me in hospital. I do have kidney issues, but I was at work on Monday, and he should have been too- we got the bus into the city together that morning!\n\nI asked him about the details of how he got fired and he said it was in the office, by a guy called Stuart. The emails say a guy called Ed fired him over the phone. \n\nI'm upset he obviously lied to me and that he felt the need to put his suit on, get the bus to work with me, then turn around and go home.\n\nHe has asked why I'm so curious about the details, so he's getting worried. I don't know whether to confront him or not, because snooping isn't really on.\n\nI'm so annoyed he lost his job and now I'll be struggling to keep a roof over our heads, pay the bills etc.", "summary": "Husband struggles to get and keep a job, read his emails and discovered he'd been bunking the day he got fired. Asked him about it, the lies continued."}
{"id": "t3_3c65v7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] really like a girl [18F] but she's going to college an hour away next year.", "post": "Some quick details. I have known her for 2 years now, been good friends for one year, and we both started talking a lot and liking each other within the past 2-3 months. I'm still in high school (senior next year) and she is starting college next year. She moves into her place which is an hour away in 2 weeks and is also leaving to Europe for 2 weeks the same week. I basically have 3 weeks of summer with her and 2 of them consist of her living an hour away.\n\nI like her a lot. She is the best match I have ever found. We are alike in all the right ways and yet are different enough to stay interested. She likes me, not quite as much honestly, but as much as I would expect from 2 months of frequent talking.\n\nNow the issue. She is going to live an hour away. Now a few problems arise. 1. Transportation. Well I can drive and so can she. My parents are kind enough to where if I say that we're dating they'd pay for the gas for me to see her like once a week. 2. It feels wrong, like I'm holding her back from fully experiencing life and the newfound freedom that she has. I talked to her about it and she said it felt the same for her, like it would be holding me back from experiences I could have, with me being stuck on her. And 3. The reality of a long distance relationship, even if its only an hour long. We are both realists when it comes to life. We see what we think the most likely outcome would be. Although I am oddly optimistic about it, she is still being realistic. We agreed, it could work but what we get out of it just isn't enough to justify it.\n\nSo, what's your opinion? Is it worth it? Is it realistic to do?", "summary": "I like her and she likes me but she'll be an hour away and we just don't know if its worth it to really try and make it work or to let it go."}
{"id": "t3_4bklue", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] don't know how to go about with my [20 F] coworker as we continue talking.", "post": "We have been working together for about 20 hours a week at a very low stress part time job and spend a good amount of time interacting while at work. About two months ago my ex broke up with me and so did hers around the same time, so we were open with how we were feeling and supported each other after the break ups.\n\nSince then we have been been getting closer and I have always had the mindset that she would be a great friend to have and to not start a relationship with her, mostly because I am worried about what baggage we might both carry into it.  Both of her previous boyfriends have cheated on her, and I've always told myself after getting out of a relationship where I wasn't trusted that I would find somebody that I know trust won't be an issue.\n\nAs time goes by I am starting to have more feelings for her and I can feel my head trying to rationalize maybe giving a relationship a chance.  She has told me that she likes me and I told her I felt the same way, and just recently we hooked up (just making out no sex) after a long day of working together, and I'm looking for any advice you guys can give me! Is it smart to just give it a chance if its something we're both ready for? When would I know if its time or what signs should I look for to tell me its too soon or it wouldn't work?", "summary": "My friend at work and I have caught feelings for each other after 2 months of flirting/talking a lot and I don't know how to know when/if its the right time for a relationship"}
{"id": "t3_3x7g3o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my gf [26 F] 5 months, gf having too much contact with her ex?", "post": "My gf is talking to her ex daily, pretty much throughout the day (from 09:00 to 00:00) and sees him once or twice every week (sorta feels like thats something mandatory). \n\nThis is mostly due to his emotional state, he's extremely messed up since she broke up, but ofcourse she can choose to simply ignore him for a few days etc. but she doesnt do that so.. i cant fully blame him for it.\n\nI am getting more annoyed by it every day, it's building up.. i've been telling her how much it annoys me and she understands. So she's noticably spending less time on him, but when it comes down to it.. they still talk every day and throughout the day and they will see eachother once or twice a week.\n\nMy frustration grows and grows and grows.. i'm not sure if this is normal, i've never been in such a situation before.\n\nWhat do you guys think? Is it just me, should I 'allow' this to continue and calm down about it, or am i right to be so very annoyed by this?\n\nThanks so much!", "summary": "Gf has daily and ongoing whatsapp contact with her ex and sees him once or twice a week. Am i right to be annoyed?"}
{"id": "t3_2vcpkt", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I called my sister's probation office and told them she was back on drugs. She lost custody of her daughter. I regret nothing.", "post": "My sister was in drug court for a drug charge she got almost 5 years ago. She has a 9 year old daughter. My sister and my niece had been living with her b/f who is in recovery and doing well. Everything had been going fine until I got word that she had been doing meth. I didn't even hesitate, I called her PO the next morning after find out. The way I found out was, her bf finally got sick of her shit, and he asked her to leave. He paid for her phone so he made her leave the phone. He brought the phone directly to my house, and we looked through the text messages. She was CLEARLY buying and selling meth, WHILE on probation. HER PO called Department of Child Services and they made my sister sign over custody of my niece to our mother. My sister is now in jail for violation of probation. I regret nothing. I do however, feel terrible. I just don't want to see my sister go down that dark path yet again, however, my main motivation was to make sure her daughter was safe. My niece's father was living with registered child molesters so I knew they would not send her to her dads. Her other grandmother was one of the people my sister was getting meth from, so I knew she wouldn't be an issue. I feel bad, but at the same time, I fell great!", "summary": "My sister got back on meth, I called her PO, they made her sign over custody of her daughter to my mom. No regrets, bu I feel terrible."}
{"id": "t3_45wwfe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] with my boyfriend [19M] of about 3 months, how do I stop comparing myself to his exes?", "post": "So, like  I said in the title, I've been with my SO for about 3 months now, and honestly things are going REALLY well. I'm extremely happy in the relationship, and so is he...\n\nExcept, I have this problem where  I can't stop comparing myself to other people. I especially get hung up on his exes and girls he's had flings with in the past, but  I mean, I compare myself to just about anyone, really. \n\nI wouldn't call it jealousy. I have my exes too, and that's totally fine, don't get me wrong. I just tend to compare myself. Like, for instance, pretty much all of his exes are a bit skinnier than myself and I feel bad about that, like  I'm less than them for that. I have low self esteem, so  I pick out the things in them that I think make them physically prettier than myself. \n\nI don't want to talk about it with my SO, because  I don't really want to upset him.  I've kind of mentioned it before but he didn't really seem to know what to say/do (he just kind of said \"Aw, no. you don't have to worry about that\" and told me some things he thinks are great about m, which is nice but.. doesn't really help me stop?)\n\nI don't want this to be the thing that tears us apart, because  Ii really do care about him and want it to work, but it's really stressful on me and is causing my insecurities to really flare up and create new issues based on those.", "summary": "I need help in figuring out how  I can stop comparing myself to others before it causes more problems in a fairly new relationship (the first truly stable one I've had)."}
{"id": "t3_1e0fm1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[23F] a self described introvert, insecure 1 month into relationship with more extroverted [25M] boyfriend. How can I stop freaking out?", "post": "We've been together a month, but have known each other for 2 years. working together, not much interaction other than at work. I am a much more introverted person, (although he has mentioned feeling introverted as well) but I can become very outgoing once I become completely comfortable which someone -- which sometimes takes no time at all to a longer amount of time. \n\nI feel insecurities creeping in because of his lifestyle. His family is very close, outgoing, while mine is full more of recluses who love each other, but don't spend endless amounts of time together as a group. I keep encountering situations where I am meeting family members or friends without much of a forewarning, but even if there is, I constantly feel drained and upset because I am so hard on myself and my \"quietness\" upon meeting new people. This insecurity creeps into other aspects as well about myself -- \"am I funny enough? Am I interesting enough? Should I have said that? What is he thinking?\" And I really don't like it. I just want to be me and stop it with these panic attacks about not being \"like everyone else.\" I am afraid I will push him away.", "summary": "Introverted lady feeling insecure about introverted-ness with extroverted boyfriend. How can I stop panicking and be comfortable with myself and accept his love?"}
{"id": "t3_2m822j", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Challenging a blemish on my credit score... made by my college.", "post": "Hello all,\n\nI stumbled upon this subreddit and I've been addicted for a month or so. This is a throwaway, however as a few people know my daily account. \n\nBasically, I signed up for 3 credit reports - great! Everything was fine and I had a good score besides 1 minor thing by ALL 3 reports - When I was 18, I had no money and no parents financing me and my college pushed loads of paper in my hands over and over and made me sign a BUNCH of stuff. I honestly don't remember anything about a loan but apparently they applied for one on my behalf that got rejected as I had no credit history at the time and I was unemployed trying to get into college. \n\nNow, I really want this off my report. I'm going to fight tooth and nail for it but where do I begin and what should I do? I have read a few posts and the FAQ but I feel as though I have a good grasp, I don't actually have a plan in motion. Any help?", "summary": "College applied for a loan on my behalf that got rejected and is messing up my credit score. I want to fight to get it removed..."}
{"id": "t3_3ztj3t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My future roommate [22/F] does not want to live with me [20/F] anymore", "post": "Both of us just graduated from college and we are foreigners. Our previous supervisor from our campus job offered her house for us to rent without lease since we might not stay permanently. \n\nShe's one of my closest friends in college and we used to be roommate our first semester here. However, after our lease ended, the management put us on different rooms. Before graduation, we decided to live together and share a car after graduation before one of us going to buy another car if we find a job. We are going to buy from a friend who is going to move to another state.\n\nAfter graduation, I travelled for a while with my parents. She moved into the house in December while my lease for my current apartment ends on January 22nd. During my travel, I checked in on her about the house and car situation. She said she does not have money yet to buy the car. Today, I texted her that I will pay up the car first because I need it and she can pay me up later. She decided to text me a long message. Essentially she said that she bought the car on her own and is unwilling to share and that she actually want to stay alone. She told me to get another place and she could not say no to me when I asked if she was willing to share the house because I was her friend. \n\nI haven't replied to her message yet and I have only told my current roommate. I am frantically trying to find a place to stay in a short period and I have to find a car on my own. My question is, how should I respond to her message? I am pretty sure that after this, I do not want to live with her anymore. We have the same circle of friends although I'm quite a loner. Our other closest friend is out of state and she still doesn't know about this. I'm completely baffled.", "summary": "My future roommate and close friend decided that she doesn't want to live with me anymore. My lease ends in 2 weeks."}
{"id": "t3_v3xdl", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Last night the Police knocked on my door at 1:00 AM on an \"Unattended Children\" welfare call. I refused to let him into my home without a warrant, to which he replied he didn't need one on welfare calls. Reddit, what are my rights in this sort of situation? (X-post fromAskReddit)", "post": "Hello, I was informed I should cross-post this here.\n\nI live in Texas, and I'm sitting in my study at 1 AM playing a computer game when there is a knock on my door. Now, I don't live in the best part of town, and I'm somewhat of a paranoid man, so I refuse to open the door not knowing whether he was actually an officer or not (It also didn't help that I had no peep-hole and no way to see if he was who he said he was). The officer then claims he is responding to a call about unattended children and wants to come in and look around. I tell him there are no children here but informed him that \"I'd be happy to let you in if you have a warrant, but without one I do not give permission to enter my home.\" He then informs me that on a welfare call he does not need a warrant to enter my home and then threatens to break the door down. I stand my ground and tell him he may not enter without a warrant, which is followed by silence. In this time I go to another room and look out of the window, see the badge and gun, and then go outside to meet him. It turns out the caller hadn't given him the full address and he was at the wrong place. He then (in a very polite and respectful manner) informs me he does not need a warrant to enter my home on a welfare call.\n\nReddit, is this true? If so, then what are my rights if this happens again? Care to expand my knowledge (and most likely that of others) of what to do in this situation?", "summary": "Officer says he doesn't need a warrant to enter a home without permission on a welfare check in Texas. IANAL, is this true?"}
{"id": "t3_52qyh5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(19/M)My Girlfriend (18/F) has shown interest in becoming a stripper. I don't like the idea at all. Any advice?", "post": "My girlfriend has never been any sort of stripper ever, and has only shown interest in doing it because of the enormous amounts of money she can make as one. I have expressed to her that this idea makes me uncomfortable because it would mean she has to be naked in front of other people. I do understand that some people would be okay with their girlfriend doing this, but I don't feel that way. She has said it's only so she can make a lot of money, and that no one would be touching her. Despite this I still don't like the idea. Any thoughts/comments?\n\nWe have been dating since November 2013. Just for those interested in that detail.", "summary": "Is it wrong of me to tell her that I don't like the idea and that I wouldn't appreciate her taking her clothes off in front of others even if it's just for money?"}
{"id": "t3_14m2mr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Where do I (19M) go from here (with 18F)?", "post": "So this past summer, I started a Long Distance Relationship with my girlfriend of nearly two years. As a result, we often fought, a lot, about all types of stupid, pointless shit. On one such occasion (about a month and a half ago), I broke up with her out of anger. \n\nThe very next day, I drive the 120 mile trip (one way) to apologize and fix things. She agrees she doesn't want it to end and all is well. A few days later, she breaks up with me saying she can't be with me. I tried for a little over a week to fix things with her, but she was not interested. As a result, another massive fight ensued, which ended on bad terms for both of us. Consequently, she went out to a frat party got drunk, and proceeded to \"try and meet new guys to forget about me\" (her words). That ended in her babbling on to some interested guy about me until she threw up on him. At that point, she wanted to fix things, but I was too off put by the idea that she had moved on so quickly (trying to meet other people) to want to fix anything. But she begged and pleaded and explained and justified and as of right then, we decided we would talk when she came down for winter. It was mutually stressed that we were not together, nor were things fixed, but that we did think we owe it to ourselves to talk and see where we stood. \n\nLast night, out of frustration (both physical, emotional and mental), i went out and made a bootycall of another ex girlfriend. Afterwards, I felt weird. I felt a tinge of disgust for myself, but I could not really try and make myself feel worse because I was simply a single guy. There were no feelings attached to this incident on either side, just purely physical. \n\nNow my most recent ex is coming down to see me tomorrow, and to talk and see where we stand. Honestly, I do love her and i'd love to make things work between us, and there is a good probability that she feels the same. I guess at this point, i'm just asking where do I go from here?", "summary": "GF of 2 years, LDR of a few months, fight, break ups, booty call, where go?"}
{"id": "t3_4jr9v0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What does a healthy relationship really look like? Me (29F) Doubting marriage with my partner (33M)", "post": "My fiancee and I have been together for 10 years, so I don't know any other serious relationship. We broke up briefly about 5 years ago because of broken trust and poor communication. I thought we had resolved things, but now we are engaged and I am having cold feet.\n\nI guess my question comes to this: what is a normal amount of doubt to feel in a healthy relationship? I know relationships are hard and you will never find someone who is perfect for you, but what does \"good enough\" actually look like?\n\nI feel like we don't fight well, and sometimes I wish I were with someone who had their life more together. My partner has gone through several jobs and I don't fully trust him financially. I suspect he has recently been hiding work issues from me again.\n\nI'm always worried though that I am the cause of our communication issues, or that it is my fault that he feels like he needs to keep stuff from me. But, I am also worried that maybe we aren't compatible, or that some of our issues wouldn't exist if I were with someone else. \n\nHow do I know if I should take the leap for marriage? How do I know if this is the best relationship I will have? I am really scared of leaving him only to regret it later. He has lots of good qualities also, he is so funny and I love spending time with him. I know he will make a good father one day, and he loves me a lot. But, I feel like he isn't living up to his full potential and I don't know how to help him. Is this a normal feeling before getting married??\n\nIf there are any redditors on r/relationships who are in healthy relationships, but I would love to hear from you!", "summary": "I have been in a serious relationship for my whole adult life and I can't tell if my doubts about marriage are normal! What does a marriage-worthy relationship look like?"}
{"id": "t3_2l1jq7", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I am debating blocking the man who bought a $400 plane ticket to come visit me. [x-post /r/advice]", "post": "I began talking to a guy online maybe 2 or 3 months ago and it's progressed very fast. I am only 18 and he's 25, although I have moved out of home and support myself. We talk all day, every day, calling or facetiming pretty much every night. He really, really likes me but the problem is I don't like him as much. It was all fine, until recently I mentioned how it sucks I'll never see him. Fast-forward a couple of days and he tells me he has found a super cheap plane ticket to the city I live in. He asks if I would be open to him coming to visit and not really thinking or wanting to hurt his feelings I said of course! He bought it right then and there and now I am scared. As time goes on my attraction to him is fading and I can see that he mainly likes me because I am his ideal 'perfect girl'. He is not my perfect guy, I do not want to commit to him and I am not sure if I even have feelings for him. If it weren't for the plane ticket I would probably stop talking to him as to not lead him on but now I have this paralyzing guilt that he has spent all this money to come see me and I don't even want him to. I feel like when he gets here I'm going to have to put on this huge facade, because I don't want to hurt his feelings. It takes every ounce of patience within me not to lose it with him when he's being annoying eg- going on about how well traveled he is (keep in mind I have visited 10+ countries, 5 of which on my own. He has never been outside of the Americas), how cool he is, and how so many girls want him. To be honest I feel almost no sexual attraction anymore and it's becoming overwhelming keeping up with this lie. I don't know what to do, how to go about this, or whether or not plane tickets are refundable. I need help but I am too ashamed to go to my friends about this because I'm embarrassed we met online.", "summary": "I met a guy on the internet, he bought a plane ticket to come see me, and now I am rapidly losing feelings for him."}
{"id": "t3_4jczak", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (28/f) SO (27/m) of 2 years broke up with me. Lease is up 7/31, what do I do until then?", "post": "I'll keep this short and sweet, since I'd prefer to avoid riding the emotional roller-coaster as the wounds are fresh and raw.\n\nThis happened last night.   We've been together for 2 years, living together for 10 months.  In this time we've combined so many aspects of our lives -- from our families meeting one another (which was an awesome time!), we merged our careers (both musicians) so we spent a great deal of time working and being together; I know this is a short list, but keep in mind this is the abridged version and if requested I can apply additional details.   These experiences and ultimately the life we've built together (and assumed would continue building together, read: matching career goals, discussions about marriage,  visits to the jewelry store to learn about having his family heirloom ring resized, etc) been the most loving, rewarding, and productive years of my life.   Until a few weeks ago when he said he was moving on without me. \n\nNow I'm wondering what is the logical next step.   I never in a million years knew that he was even considering separating, and for that reason I did not think it was necessary to have an exit plan.   As it is, we have a joint lease that goes through July.  I'm in an even tighter bind as I cannot afford to pay the fine to break the lease, nor do I make enough to pay the monthly rent by my self. \n\nI'm feeling extremely lost and alone, but I truly appreciate any advice you might offer.", "summary": "SO ended our 2 year relationship.  Our shared lease extends through the end of July.  I cannot afford to break the lease or pay the entire rent on my own.  Feeling lost, looking for answers."}
{"id": "t3_123b98", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [24] gain my boyfriend's respect [28]?", "post": "Me [24] Him [28], relationship of 6 months.\n\nIt's not that my boyfriend doesn't respect me.  It's that I want him to respect me even more.  I want him to admire me and for him to see me in my best light as often as possible.  Maybe this is non-sequitor, but there are so many TV wives who are not very respect-worthy.  Wives are often seen as kind of a drag.  I don't want to be that ever in his mind.  What can I do to be a woman worthy of great respect in his eyes?  Thanks for your input!", "summary": "My boyfriend treats me pretty great.  I don't have any major complaints.  I would like him to respect and admire me even more.  How do I become a woman worthy of great respect?"}
{"id": "t3_btrsn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My landlady seems to be going crazy, how should I handle this?", "post": "Last night my landlady (who lives in the unit below mine) called me at 2:30 in the morning freaked out and paranoid.  She asked me if I would come downstairs and sleep on her couch because she was afraid and couldn't sleep.  I'm not sure why I agreed, but I did.  We talked for a little while and she seemed extremely overwrought, paranoid and nervous.  At one point she asked if she could stay in my room until she found a new place to live, to which I politely said no.  Overall it was a very bizarre experience; I sat on her couch until about 6 AM and then went back upstairs to my unit.  There was no sign of any disturbance or anyone outside.  Apparently she also cornered one of my roommates a few weeks back as she was leaving the house and asked her if she had seen or heard anything strange going on.  None of us have seen any evidence of anybody loitering or hanging around or anything.  I've lived at this place for 5 years and she has always been a bit flighty, but since her husband left her a few months ago she has been even weirder, and this is a new low.\n\nAny thoughts on how I handle a potentially crazy and thus potentially very invasive/unreliable landlady without pissing her off or making my living situation untenable?", "summary": "My Landlady (who lives downstairs) seems to be going crazy and is becoming unreliable and invasive, how do I (and my housemates) handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_2v9n8l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I ask my friend[22F] If I[21F] will be allowed a plus one for her wedding?", "post": "Backstory: Bekkah and I have been friends for 3 years and she was the nanny to my daughter for over a year. She is very religious and because of this she is in a huge rush to get married (a different issue all together) and is having a wedding with little to no money.\n\nShe is having children at the ceremony but not at the reception and although my daughter was invited to the ceremony I declined and said that she would probably cause a commotion and I thought it would be best if she stayed at home. Although I did offer to dress my daughter up and for Bekkah and I to do photos before or after the ceremony which Bekkah was more than happy with. \n\nThe issue I am having is that even though it hasn't been officially said I don't think she is giving me a plus one. I do not know ANY of her friends and family or her fiance's so I will be all by myself during the ceremony and the reception. Even if I had chosen to bring my daughter to the ceremony, I would still be alone at the reception, where the socializing happens, as children are not allowed.\n\nThe invites haven't been sent out but she did mention that \"there would be a few tables of random friends\" when I expressed that I wouldn't know anyone there. That hurt. Because of this I am assuming there will be no plus one.\n\nI understand that they are tight on money but honestly I am not sure if I even want to go to a 4 hour long reception and eat dinner so I can socialize with a bunch of strangers and get a total of 5 seconds to see my friend. We are close and I want to support her on her special day but it feels sort of tacky to ask to bring a plus one but then again I feel it is sort of tacky to not include one in my invite. Maybe I am wrong.", "summary": "My friend is getting married and it looks like I won't be receiving a plus one. I don't know anyone else who will be attending."}
{"id": "t3_30nd04", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I had an argument with the gf about a guy getting fired from her job", "post": "32 m 25 f of 1 year\n\nI feel like the gf disagrees with me just for the sake of arguing lol it happens so much that its kinda funny\n\nany way, this guy at her work has been sexually harassing her. lets say that she works at Ross. she told the managers and i guess it stopped. he has been harassing some of the other girls. i guess he has been crude with them. he told my gf that he flat out wanted to **** her. he has pulled out a radio out of back pocket. gf felt uncomfortable.\n\ni told the gf that i will write to the headquarters about his behavior and i hope he gets fired. she said no that he shouldnt get fired because the economy is bad and it sucks not having a job. i told her yeah but he can work somewhere else, not just at your workplace.\n\nshe disagreed and said it doesnt matter if he works there, as long as they dont work the same shifts. then i just said yeah but hes harassing the girls that work there. he should be fired from Ross. this went on for about 15 minutes. back and forth, pretty ridiculous.\n\nwas this even worth arguing? couldnt the gf just agree that hes a creep and he doesnt belong there??", "summary": "told gf that this creep shouldnt work at Ross with her but she argued for about 20 minutes on why he shouldnt get fired."}
{"id": "t3_1aw875", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He's[24M] being distant, am I[22F] over analyzing?", "post": "I'm in a ldr with my boyfriend[24] of almost a year. Lately we've both been stressed...him more than me. He's been living in a place that he's unhappy at, mostly because of roommates. He works a job he's displeased with, one because of coworkers being so drama filled, and two the pay isn't enough to pay his bills. He has his own debts to worry about, plus paying to fix his car. \n\nI don't have a car, so if we want to see each other he has to come to me. I have my own debt that i've been trying to pay off. Also, i have been trying to join the NAVY since October. As far as the military goes its been a long process because of my debt, and me having a few slip-ups. \n\nTo the point; My boyfriend has been feeling less and less confident about the military working out. And in doing so, he seems more distant. He's saying that maybe we should focus on ourselves and our individual goals. I replied saying that we can do that and still be together, and he was iffy about it. \n\nI just don't understand whats going on. We both agree that breaks are stupid, and we love each other too much to breakup. And by love i mean we talk about marriage and long term goals. But what i'm upset about is, if things with the navy were going well, then he wouldn't be saying these things...at least i hope he wouldn't. And then I don't know what he means by the things he's saying? \n\nI don't know what he wants. I don't know if i'm over analyzing or if he's not being as open with me as he should be. Am i being to pushy? What should i do?", "summary": "He's[24m] being distant, am i[22f] over-analyzing or should i be worried?"}
{"id": "t3_2njcwu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20M] am not sure what I am feeling and how to deal with it, kinda about a friend of a friend [20F]", "post": "so the small backstory of my romantic life is I got cheated on. A lot. so about 2 and a half years ago I decided I was sick of relationships and girls, I started focusing on my life goals and what not but over these few years I have been telling myself that relationships are a horrible thing and I just want to be alone and it was working, I am happy being single and don't want it any other way. This is where it gets confusing though.\n\nI met this girl [20F] Saturday night and it turns out we have loads in common, we were talking to each other a lot and got quite close, like arms around each other and stuff, I should point out we were both drunk but we were having a really good time in each other's company. I was told at one point that she was in a relationship, which I'm fine with because I don't want a relationship yet I felt really close to her that night. Nothing else happened and I have spoken to her since then and while we weren't all over each other she was hugging me and showed interest in me.\n\nThis is the issue though, there is a part of me feeling attracted to her and wanting to see her, I'm thinking about her a bit and generic 'crush' behaviour but the other part of me wants to keep my peace and quiet lifestyle and I keep telling myself that girls are bad news but I'm tearing myself apart over this small attraction to a girl I hardly know. I'm angry at myself for being close to a girl while drunk when I knew she was in a relationship, I want to get closer to her, but I don't ever want to see her again just to restore peace to my life.\n\nThis is so frustrating because I have no idea what I am feeling right now, but it is stopping me from sleeping, it's currently 2am and I need to be up at 7am to get to lectures. I need to restore peace in my mind so I can relax again and sleep. I just don't know, I'm in such a confused state right now. Any insights would be nice, just anything that could clear my head. Please.", "summary": "read the last 2 paragraphs, there is no way I can make it shorter. Please help, I can't stay like this."}
{"id": "t3_4uguat", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "brother (28M) and I (26M) recently got into an argument that got physical.", "post": "My older brother and I are in our late twenties and are only two years apart. This afternoon we got into a physical altercation in front of family and strangers.\nWe were coming back from a family trip to Cancun and our seats were separated on our way back. I was sitting in the back and my mother, father, sis-in-law and brother were up towards the front. When the plane landed, they went directly to customs without letting me know. I got off the plane and couldn't find them. I waited around since my phone was dead, assuming they went to the bathroom. Eventually I ran to customs to find them in line. After sprinting to them I asked them why they left without letting me know. My brother got upset with this question and began calling me names in front of our mother and a line full of strangers, calling me immature, stupid and a p*ssy for thinking this way and not going straight to customs. I tried to explain to him why I brought it up, but he shoved me and continued arguing. Eventually I straightened up (I work out and box on a regular basis, while he is more of the sit at home activity/video gamer type) and told him it was not okay to do that. He proceeded to continue arguing and told me to \"f---- off\" and that he was \"done with me and never to call him again\". I was incredibly hurt by his words, but still upset that he would not respect my boundaries.  I'm still up, hours later, wondering if this is a normal thing that happens or if I need to apologize. Please help and be blunt, I respect my older brother and consider him one of my best friends and have never sworn or raised my hand in anger to him. I care about him and his new family (he is recently married to a wonderful woman).", "summary": "brother(28m) and I(26m) got into a physical confrontation after a miscommunication. I asked him to respect my boundaries and he told me to F off."}
{"id": "t3_43d52x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] and girl im hanging out with [23F] just revealed her sex count to me and I guess I am taking this the wrong way, any advice?", "post": "Okay, so me and this girl have been hanging out a lot the last month, and she brought up the conversation of sexual partners. So, of course I tell her mine, 1(7 year relationship). I was not sure If I should ask her... but curiosity killed the cat, and she said 7.\n\nNow, you may be thinking oh 7 that aint shit, I thought the same thing. Until she added that 6 of them were one night stand while in college. and this just ate me alive. I am obviously into relationships, and not casual hookups/sex at all, and this kind of hit me like a bricks because I am not interested in someone who has had one night stands and would rather build something with someone who has had meaningful relationships. I played it off like it was cool, but I got home just now and am like wow... I just don't know how to feel or anything cause we have gotten super close.\n\nJust want to know how to approach the situation or how to ask her questions without seeming like an insecure guy/ shallow person because of her one night stands/promiscuity for the one night stands'.\n\nThanks guys.", "summary": "Girl ive been hanging with told sexual partners, was not a lot, but 6 out of 7were one night stands and this bothers me, how do I approach this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_1aikaf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by fucking in my car", "post": "So I met up with a horny lady friend on the interwebs. House is occupied so we decided that it was all fine to fuck in my coupe vehicle. We shared some bubbles and then went at it on the passenger seat. Things started to get so hot that I had to open the door, as the car was full of condensation and such. Damn car makes a beeping noise when the doors open and the keys are in the ignition, so I switched the key to the accessory position - didn't think much of it. Bucket loads of sweat was extracted all over each other, dripping into the seatback.\n\nLater that evening after dropping her off, I noticed the SRS light on my dash. Damn, must have shaken the car too much and tripped the incident meter. I googled around and contacted the local specialist to visit me the following day while at work to sort it out.\n\nWell, today he turned up and hooked his computer into my dash. \nHim: \"Hmm... looks like theres a reported fault with the sensor\". \nMe: \"Oh, yeah. Damn thing's played up in the past. What's it say?\"\nHim: \"It's reporting a fault with the sensor in the passenger seat.\"\nMe\" \"Um... yeah I was moving some stuff in my car in the weekend\".\nHim: \"Oh, it says here the liquid submersion indicators were set off. Did you get the seats wet?\"\nMe: *blushing* \"um... yeah I also cleaned my car. Perhaps I wet the seat. Ooops.\".\n\n$80 later and he's reset my system, and told me that in the future if i'm moving things about or cleaning to turn my ignition off to not trip the sensors.", "summary": "If you're going to fuck in your modern SRS-equipped car, turn the ignition off or you're going to have a bad time. Or fuck on the back seats."}
{"id": "t3_159fxh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Men of Reddit, what was your most alpha moment?", "post": "Yesterday a friend invited me to go to a club. The music was kind of lame, so I just stood by the bar watching Fight Club.\n\nAll of a sudden, a guy and a woman came up to me and complimented the way I was dressed. We chatted a little and the guy goes out to smoke.\n\nI kept chatting with the woman and asked if he was her boyfriend. She said that he wasn't, and that her boyfriend had just dumped her. And damn, she's gourgeous.\n\nThen a friend of her came to us, said I was handsome and that I should kiss her friend. I said \"no problem\", but the woman just evades me.\n\nThen her friend said \"if she doesn't want to kiss you, I want\". We kiss and she tells me I'm the fourth guy she kissed that night, but I was the handsomest and the best kisser.\n\nI keep talking to the first woman. She invites me to dance with her. Before we go to the dance floor, her friend asks for another kiss.\n\nWe go to the dance floor and she says to me she wanted to kiss me badly, but couldn't because I'm 20 and she was 27. I said \"that's bullshit. Just close your eyes and pretend I'm 30.\" So she kiss me, and says I'm an amazing kisser.\n\nBy the end of the night, I felt like the Overly Manly Man meme should be a photo of me, not that black-and-white faggot.", "summary": "Kissed two beautiful women at the same night, both way older than me and both said I was an amazing kisser."}
{"id": "t3_3dvj2u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my bf [23M] a little over a year, says he's not sexually attracted to me anymore", "post": "So my boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half and I love him more than anything.  We both try to be open and communicative and rarely fight.  \n\nWhen we first started dating we would have sex once or twice a week, but then for a while it was like twice a month.  Now I don't think we've had sex since the beginning of June.  He's gained a bit of weight and he blamed his lack of a sex drive on that, citing that it makes him self-conscious, something that I can easily understand.\n\nLast night we were both drunk, him more so, and he admitted to me that the night before he made out with his guy friend.  It's been an acknowledged problem that I'm a kinda shitty kisser and so I thought it was just because of that.  He admitted though that he realized a few weeks ago that he's not sexually attracted to me anymore.  \n\nBecause we were both drunk, it blew up into the biggest fight we've ever had by far.  He told me that my new hair cut is part of the problem (shaved on sides, long on top- think Ruby Rose) as is the bad-kisser-thing.  He even nearly broke up with me.\n\nWe eventually decided to just go to bed and talk about it in the morning. \n\n So this morning, we talked about it a little more- and 100% more rationally and reasonably.  He was miserable about the way he brought it up and how rude he was about it.  He still loves me, he still loves being affectionate, but sexually it's just not there for him.  This is super disappointing to me, but we've both agreed it's totally fixable and we love each other enough to make it work.  \n\nBut now I'm sort of sitting here grasping at any straw I can trying to find some way to make him want to bone me.  It's super depressing.", "summary": "My boyfriend isn't sexually attracted to me, but we still love each other... I want to figure out how to make this work/how to reignite a spark.  Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3rgbqg", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Verizon FIOS!!!!!!!!........ can go fuck themselves", "post": "i just had a long ass conversation with unintelligible twats about why my internet service is only 1% functional of what I paid for. Called those fuckers up... They told me about you can either pay, pay, or pay for a technician and when I finally got this fucker in a corner to guarantee some shit I bluffed and told him that he better stick to his word because I was recording, at which point he told me that he could terminate the conversation at any time and hung up on me...... What the fuck can I do about this?? they are fucking me over, claim that some cords the technician gave me are technically mine and can be the cause of the problem which they will then charge me $90 for the first hour and $40 every hour after.", "summary": "Even though they are not providing the service that they gave me they want me to pay more and I am fed up with getting fucked over. I would love some help"}
{"id": "t3_2zij1o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(15M) asked out my crush (15F), confused about her answer...", "post": "I've been into this girl for a few weeks. I've seen her around the hallways a few times, but we've never really talked. Recently, I've gotten to know her a bit better, and started to notice she was kind of cute. So, today, I decided to ask her out after class.\n\nI pulled her aside after we had class today, and asked if she'd like to have lunch together sometime, and she just kind of looked at the ground and started giggling, saying, \"I don't know, I don't know,..\"\n\nI was hoping for a ***real*** answer, but this is worse than a yes OR a no. A yes would've been great, and no would've stung, but I'd have been over it in a day or two. But this feels like some sort of weird limbo. I told her, \"If you want to say no say it, you're not going to hurt my feelings.\" But she kept saying, \"I don't know, I don't know\". I feel like this is some sort of weird way to spare my feelings, even though I don't need them spared, I just want an answer. \n\nI had class with her after that again today, and she seemed very, stiff, I guess the word would be. Just kind of staring down blankly at her book, not really moving her head or body, and seemed to(at least to me, although I must admit I wasn't paying much attention)rush out of class a bit quickly.\n\nI don't want things to be awkward between us, but would it be weird if I asked her tomorrow if it was a definitive \"no\"? Or should I just tell her not to worry, and that it's only awkward if we make it awkward.\n\nI **do** want to handle this like adults, and continue to have a friendship with her, but I'm not sure how to make this happen without asking her what, \"I don't know means\". Is this something all girls do, did I do something wrong?", "summary": "Asked out crush of a few weeks, she repeated, \"I don't know\" quite a few times, not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4np667", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [40 F] with my lover [30 M] chose other woman, I behaved badly", "post": "After 8 months, my lover chose another woman over me. We tried to maintain a work relationship, but I just was a total bitch. I don't want to be but then I think too much, and I'm hurt and mad. He's been so kind. I thought I was in love, but how can I love someone I'm so willing to hurt and be mean to? I should be happy for him, and I should want him to be happy no matter what. But why am I so hateful if I love him? Maybe I am just a selfish bitch? He loves me on some level, he's said, I believe him. He just has other obligations to this other woman. I get it, but why then can't I be happy for him, and just love him and move on? Am I incapable of love?", "summary": "I was dumped but we still are in contact. I can't just be happy for him. Does that mean I didn't really love him?"}
{"id": "t3_1dagm1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend (F26) cheated on me (M25). Now I have feelings for her best friend who broke the news.", "post": "My hands are covered in glitter after a project with my niece, hence the username.  \n\nMy girlfriend cheated on me a few weeks ago and it was her best friend that broke the news to me.  We're in a serious relationship of seven months.  \n\nAfter finding out she cheated, I confronted her and she admitted to everything.  She felt terrible and was pretty much bawling her eyes out the entire night, begging me not to leave her.  For the time being, I agreed to try and work things out.\n\nHowever, ever since her best friend broke the news to me, I feel like I'm beginning to crush on her.  She's an attractive girl and she has morals, something my girlfriend obviously lacks.  We've gotten close over the last few weeks and I'm really falling for her.  And she doesn't hide the fact that the feelings are mutual.  We've got a lot in common, she *gets* me - Maybe this is why she decided to throw my girlfriend under the bus?  \n\nHowever,  **I'm not a cheater.**  So I guess I have to make a decision, which is why I'm here.  Would I be an asshole to dump my girlfriend for her best friend?  I'm not looking to get revenge on my girlfriend - I'm not that type of guy.  But I really don't know if I want to fix a relationship that my girlfriend was willing to risk for a sex-filled night with her ex.\n\nI need to make a decision soon.  I don't want to string either girl along.  Do I suck it up and work things out with my girlfriend, dump her for her best friend, or leave both of them behind entirely?  \n\nAdvice is greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Girlfriend cheated, her best friend broke the news to me and now I'm falling for her.  Having a hard time deciding if I should leave my girlfriend for her best friend."}
{"id": "t3_1bpdb5", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "My [27M] first date with [23F] tonight...help me read the signs please.", "post": "My [27M] first date with [23F] tonight, we met online and texted for 4 days before meeting a lot. Lots of similar interests, good conversation both texting and in person. We exchanged pictures before meeting and we discussed her coming back to my house and cuddling to a movie after the bar and she said yes possibly.\n\nSo tonight, we had a few drinks at the bar, stayed for 1.5 hours, and she was getting a lot of texts on her phone, she said her room mates were cooking enchiladas and were being very persuasive for her to go home and eat with them...\n\nSo she bailed on the cuddling/movie, I asked if she wanted to hangout again and she said \"Yes definitely and we should watch Lord of the Rings together since we both love it.\" I walked her to her car, and got a quick kiss on the lips, no tongue.\n\nMixed signals it seems like to me right? Could go either way, her liking me or not?", "summary": "1st date, mixed signals, quick peck on lips, says yes to 2nd date, but bails on our followup plans on 1st date. Whats the story?"}
{"id": "t3_q2nzz", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Examples of casual dining?", "post": "Generally, I choose either coffee, lunch, or drinks for my dates. Or, if I know the person a bit, something that is relevant to them.\n\nRecently, my schedule has been shying towards weeknights being free. Which means I don't want to be drinking, and it's a bit late for lunch.\n\nObviously, fast food is (generally) a poor date choice unless you know the person gets wet for McDonalds. Fine dining is both expensive and over the top, but I'm wondering if anyone can give me some examples of casual dining. Is this like, Denny's kinda stuff? Tony Roma's or Boston Pizza?", "summary": "I'm completely lost when it comes to dinner places, and would love a few examples of places so I know what I'm looking for."}
{"id": "t3_3u3mxy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to be the good guy", "post": "So this happened yesterday.. My best friend ( a girl) started flirting with a friend of mine on Friday. She never told me anything.. I found out when my friend decided to show half the squad their text message exchange. That shit hurt like a mf, this lead to me finding out I have feelings for her. \n\nI had the ability to end what was happening between them but chose not to.. Opting to let it carry on since she was happy. So come Monday they fuck. I should probably mention that my friend thinks I have no feelings for her. By then half the dorm knows what's going on and she has no idea. \n\nLater that night I received a message from her saying we need to talk and that she'd fucked up. This is where shit turns bad.. I let her know that I've known this entire time and half the dorm does too. (She asked me a direct question and I almost never lie to her). She lost her shit. She's now mad at me for not saying anything all weekend and I'm like fuck I was just trying to be a good guy.", "summary": "my best friend hooks up with my friend thinking its discreet, due to my feelings for her I choose to stay away from this. She still ends up being mad at me"}
{"id": "t3_127dpc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help Medical Debt", "post": "A year ago I was my friend was in a horrendous accident and got some wonderful help at kaiser. While staying with him over night there was a stressful moment asking nurses for painkillers. while my friend was pleading for drugs I passed out infront of the nurse. \n\nShe called an emergency code and I was put in a wheel chair and brought to the ER. Once there I caught my breath and felt fine and demanded to be released knowing the test the plained to run in me would cost a pretty Penny. I'm a student with no insurance. they insisted my school would cover me and took my information. 8 months pass and I get a call from debt collection that my debt has already been sold and I owe $1000. since I have savings below double digits I couldn't  pay them. \n\nDoes anyone know of a program or fund I may qualify for that could absolve.my debt? I've ignored it got almost half a year and I fear our may ruin me if I ignore out longer", "summary": "broke student passed out in front of nurses, garnered large debt. Didn't kiaser never contacted me only collection company"}
{"id": "t3_1lmgsm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [18M] not sure how to fix this with my [17F] girlfriend", "post": "The other night we we're outside star gazing and having a good time. We kissed cuddled and everything was great. Once we got in her truck to go home, she begins telling me that she isnt sure that are relationship is going anywhere and that we are at a stalemate. This left me confused since we have only been dating for 3 weeks and we have both been busy from work and haven't seen each other as often as we would have liked to. We have kissed, made out, cuddled, watched movies together, everything besides sex. So im not sure how we are at a stalemate? \n\nAnother point she said was that we are going to slow. We have met each others parents and, once again, have done about everything except for sex (we are both virgins). I dont really know how i could speed things up? Perhaps more time together? \n\nAny advice is much appreciated! :)", "summary": "Girlfriend said that we are moving too slow and that out relationship isnt going anywhere and is at a \"stalemate\". Now sure how to fix this"}
{"id": "t3_2aogkp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27F] called my husband [32m] of 8 years physically unattractive in the heat of an argument. I'm worried I destroyed intimacy forever...", "post": "So my husband and I were arguing about how I don't feel heard/validated in any of my complaints but his get addressed and resolved promptly. I was trying to convey to him that his words towards me affect the way I feel about him sexually and I told him he's not physically attractive to me anymore. \n\nHe is morbidly obese and has been going to the gym daily for 4 months. He doesn't diet. His apathy about his health for the past 6 years has built up for me. We have 3 kids and I've maintained my health/looks. I know it sounds selfish to say that but I want him to take care of himself too. I will admit that throughout our relationship our sex life has been in trouble because of this and my low libido. I'm currently pregnant and want to have sex with everything that walks, I'd like to use this to our advantage because I know sex can be healing.\n\nI know that I was too hard on him when he came to me the morning after and basically told me I had him boxed in. That there is nowhere for him to go from here and how do you restore intimacy after something like that. He even said that after he loses 100lbs its still not going to be the same. He's humiliated.", "summary": "How do I help my husband understand what I was actually trying to say and help him feel less humiliated? I want to restore intimacy and make our sex life better."}
{"id": "t3_3ijdct", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18M) can't seem to make any friends after starting Uni earlier this year.", "post": "Not sure if this is the right subreddit, but I'll shove it here anyway.\n\nI graduated high school last year, and pretty much immediately fell out of touch with most of the people I'd hung out with there. I made some half-hearted attempts at making friends when Uni started up in March this year, and since then, but I just don't have any idea how to go about it. I'm kind of thinking I've missed the bus now, since everyone seems to have friends and I have no idea how to inject myself into an existing group of friends. There's a couple of people that I was in a group with on O-week, who I talk to occasionally, but I don't know how to make the next step there, either.", "summary": "Dropped out of contact with most (not all) high-school friends, and don't have any idea how to make new friends at Uni this year. How do I do that, reddit?"}
{"id": "t3_pa637", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is the craziest thing that you have ever seen, but don't have a picture to prove it?", "post": "I'll go first.\n\nWhile on vacation in South Carolina, my family rented out a house in a marshy area for the duration of the stay.  After spending the day at the beach, we came home and changed out of our swimsuits into different clothes.  All of a sudden, we heard a horrific screaming noise.  We all came together in the living room, at first thinking that someone in our family had seriously injured themselves.  Quickly we realized that the noise was coming from outside.  We walked out to the deck, which faced the marshy lake area, and there we found a fucking alligator with his big jaws wrapped around a deer's leg.  The scream had come from the deer.  My mom was so freaked out that she ran inside and cried.  My sisters, dad, and I were just so freaking intrigued.  We watched the alligator slowly twist around the deer's leg, and every time it would move, the deer would scream again.  At the moment, we were just too freaked out to even think about running to get a camera.  The alligator ate the whole deer.  What the fuck.  Basically every time I tell this story I feel like people don't believe me because it is so crazy.  We should have taken a picture!!", "summary": "My family and I were practically Steve Irwin for a night and watched on our porch as an alligator ate a deer.  "}
{"id": "t3_2rvdmb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] pregnant to my [22M] boyfriend and I want to keep it", "post": "I'll try to sum this up best that I can.  I am a 22 year old career focused female who just found out tonight that I am pregnant to my 22 year old boyfriend.  We have a very tumultuous relationship and he does not want a child anytime soon.  This was a complete accident.  I was on the pill.  I had an abortion when I became pregnant with his child 12 months ago whilst I was also on contraceptive.  I do not think I can go through that again and want to keep the child but not want to upset him or ruin his life by doing so.  I need some advice.", "summary": "Pregnant to my boyfriend by pure accident.  Had an abortion before and don't want to go through one again.  Wat do?"}
{"id": "t3_2xtysy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU Asking an interviewer for a name.", "post": "Earlier this week*\n\nSo, I have this interview for this summer job I really want. I should add it's my first job interview in my life and it's a somewhat competitive position, but I've done other kinds of interviews and Q/a things before.\n\nTry to hype myself up and what not, but all I end up doing is getting to be a nervous wreck. That's usual for me, and it's just something I have to deal with in these kinds of situations.\n\nInterview goes acceptably by my standards. I think I really did fine considering my nervousness. I get home and google what's normal to do after an interview and the consensus seems to be to send personalized thank you cards.\n\nI can't remember a single name.\n\n(I don't people always say they're bad with names, but I'm really bad. Like, in and out one ear bad.)\n\nGo online and search for company. Look up the office number, and find a phone number. Plan on talking to receptionist and asking for name.\n\nHere's the call, Gonna call the interviewer Benedict:\nring* ring* ring* ring*....... silence......\n\nMe: ..... uhm....,Hello?\n\nOther: Hello.\n\nMe: Is this the [company's] office?\n\nOther: Yes.\n\nMe: Hi, uh, I was wondering if, uh, you could tell me the name of t-the person who was doing interviews here today?\n\nOther: Who is this?\n\nMe: uh... AroundCorner\n\nOther: And you wanted to know the name of the interviewer?\n\nMe: Yea, I think it was something like Bens... or...Bens...?\n\nOther: Benedict?\n\nMe: Ah yes, that was it!\n\nOther: That's my name, we were talking earlier this hour\n\nSilence*\n\nMe: Oh, Uh... yea we met half an hour ago.\n\nOther: Is that all.\n\n(I'm really flustered)\nMe: Yea, uhm, (something cringe* about spelling)\n\nOther: okay bye.", "summary": "Had an interview. Forgot interviewers name. Called expecting a receptionist. Interviewer picked up. Thought I was talking to receptionist until the very end."}
{"id": "t3_20xp5m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[24] and my boyfriend[26] are at our wits end.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been fighting a lot lately. We have had a lot of communication problems and I have had issues with giving him attitude making things worse, and him blowing things out of proportion that were such small issues. I get defensive when he gets upset and overreacts over small things instead of apologizing and being considerate that he is upset. Sometimes I will say or do something with good intentions but it comes off as rude to him, and I don't realize it at the time, which makes him blow up, and it gets ridiculous. We can't seem to have a fight with out things getting blown out of proportion. \n\nHe is at the end of his rope and I can't stand to let this relationship end, because we have so much going for us. He wants me to present him with a new way to fix things, and gain trust that this will not be a frequent thing in our relationship anymore. I don't know what to say with out insulting him, or how to reassure him that things will be better in future fights. I had gone to therapy to help deal with some anger I had, and I was able to accomplish a lot. But he says he has heard all of the same excuses too many times and nothing has changed. Someone, give me an action plan to help improve this madness! HELP.\n\nHe thinks it is only me that has to think of a plan at this point. How can I tell him in the best way that it has to be both of us together?", "summary": "If your boyfriend made you think of a \"plan\" to better communication, especially where there's conflict when he's pretty much threatening the relationship, what could I do?"}
{"id": "t3_12f90q", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "think I got gipped? [ex post from /r/relationship_advice]", "post": "Alright, I maybe exaggerating but I have to vent. So a few days ago, I broke up with my gf of 11 months [18/f] and got into a small depression. But then it hit me, the next day I started talking to a new girl, she seemed pretty legit and everything, I kinda edged on that she was pretty chill and got to the point that day we started saying \"Oh you're cute\" and all that mushy shit. She seemed a bit girly saying I was lovely, adorable, etc etc, but the here and now, the next day, started with a good morning text, she said it back, then we talked for a bit there jokingly saying to come over here and make both of us food so we don't starve since she had no power, then it stopped there. Tonight, I decided to text her a goodnight message then I got a text back saying goodnight.. jokingly, I said \"Oh, forgot about me already huh?\" she said \"Nah, I'm just easily distracted\" Now I can't determine whether or not if she's bullshitting or not", "summary": "Talked to this girl the whole day then barely talked the next, any conclusion whether or not she's bullshitting?"}
{"id": "t3_517ak2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26F] partner [35 M] of almost 2 years, has a weight/body image problem and i dont know what to do", "post": "I am planning on moving into my partners house next year, things have been so good between us, we just work as a couple even though we don't have a predominantly sexual or romantic relationship. We are very affectionate with each other though and i think of him as my world. \nWhen we started dating he was definitely overweight but he was working on it and it was very intense and i felt like i had come into his life at a time when he was really trying to do something positive about his body, he wouldnt over eat, drink much and was seeing a personal trainer while working full time - after 6 months he had actually lost more than a quarter of himself which is actually quite allot. he was still big but not to any degree i had a problem with. \n\nthis year however, he has suffered through some heavy depression as well as i and he has put allot of his energy into helping me get through stuff. at some points though i was monitoring his diet and stuff (not in a wierd way just asking him what he was having for lunch) and i noticed that even though he was working 8 hour shifts standing up and moving around, eating small meals and just generally pushing himself, he was actually gaining weight?\nhe is now as big if not bigger than when we started dating? I think its simply the sugar in his diet and i confronted him on this and he pulled away from me. we havent spoken in two days now. \nI was addressing a concern i had regarding our long term future, like - will this be a problem in ten years? is this never going to be resolved for him and if so, do i have to make a decision based on that. \n  \nalso just to add - i never really had a problem with his weight so much, though i have learned how important and big a deal it is for him.", "summary": "really great relationship with partner but concerned about spending the rest of our lives together because of his weight and body image problems."}
{"id": "t3_2yz2cp", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "My mum can't speak English, and is illiterate - what jobs are available for her?", "post": "Hello reddit. I'm curious as to what the anons of the interwebs might have to suggest.\n\nI'm in my final semester of uni, would love to live/work/travel abroad after I graduate, and generally would like life experience away from home  (i.e living independently). \n\nDear mother is illiterate in both her native tongue and English, but can speak very basic English (enough to do the shopping, have a short and simple conversation with people), so is very reliant on me. She's currently on government benefits. She's always complaining about her bad eye sight.\n\nQuestion is - what type of jobs would be available for her? Is there anything she can do to survive independently if I were to move out?", "summary": "Dear mother not literate in English or native tongue, what are some plausible job options for her to make a living to survive on her own?"}
{"id": "t3_2cdfe6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Would you wait 5 years for the love of your life? I am [28 F] moving across the country for school and not sure if it's fair to ask my bf [28 M] of 1 year to wait for me", "post": "So the length of our relationship is complicated... I've known him for over 4 years and we've always been very close, but we've technically only been a \"couple\" for about 1 of those years because of both of us having personal issues that kept us apart (basically he was dealing with alcoholism and I didn't want to be around him when he was drunk all the time, but he's been sober for years now and I've learned to trust him again). \n\nAfter I found out I was accepted into a great program for school was also the same time that I realized that I am actually really serious about this person and I want to have a future with him! Like, we would be married already if it wasn't for me moving away... He's really serious about me, and he's trying to be supportive about me leaving but I know he's worried that it means it's over.\n\nMaking the decision to leave and not just stay with him has been really painful, and now that I've decided to put my education first, I'm not sure where that leaves us. It might be possible that he could join me in 2 years, but not earlier than that because of his own career commitments.", "summary": "i'm moving across the country for school, and i'm not sure if it's fair to ask the love of my life to wait 5 years for me to return, or what we should do?"}
{"id": "t3_30ql2s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M]with a best friend/sister like[18F] \"possible progress\" problem.", "post": "Hello, I think it's important to point out that I'm not your typical \"senior year high school\" guy. I tend to, maybe not stand out, but I'm defnitely different from the others. My town is pretty small, and most people listen to rap, while I'm one of the few who listens to heavier stuff like metal, however I also like Eminem! The point is, I don't really have that many friends, tho the ones I have are great. I'm also pretty shy, which surprises many people because I usually wear full black, with heavy boots and sometimes chains hanging out of my belt.\n\nI have this best friend, she's like a little sister to me, and I'm like a brother to her. We know each other for almost 4 years now. I'm pretty sure she had a crush on me, while I had on her, but on different \"stages\" per say. Many people would often confuse us as a couple, because we acted like one, without kissing, having an intercourse and so on, that's not to say we hadn't had a sleepover. We do a lot of things together,  sometimes even catch ourselves finishing each others senteces, or say the same thing at the same time. Her parents like me so much they lent me a key to their house so I could surprise her with her best(girl)friend on her birthday. Now, my crush has started after 2 years of our friendship, then it kind of disappeared, but started to take effect about a month-two ago. Yet I'm not sure if I should talk to her about it, since her crush \"time\" I believe has long since ended. She didn't talk to me about hers, and I don't think I have the guts to talk about mine. It's a weird situation for me, as I've never really had to deal with those things, because..well, I'm only 19. I'd really appreciate any suggestions, if I should lay everything on the table, if I should forget about it and keep what's at the moment..I'm in a pinch!", "summary": "I'm 19, shy, not your normal guy, who recently \"fell\" again for his bestfriend, little sister like girl, that I know for four years, but have no idea how to come about it."}
{"id": "t3_2246vj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Can someone who's into fitness be attracted to someone who's not particularly athletic?", "post": "I [F20s] recently started talking to a guy [20s] online and we really seem to hit it off. However, simply put, he's really into fitness and I'm not super athletic. I'm nervous about meeting him in person because I'm afraid he won't find me physically attractive.\n\nLet me clarify, I am not obese or extremely overweight; I have some curves and a bit of tummy squish but overall I'm very proportioned and have never had trouble getting dates or having guys find me attractive. I'm just not toned-- I have an ass and hips but I'm generally happy with my figure except for a few problem areas. \n\nI've started to try and fix  those problem areas by adding work outs into my routine. I'm definitely not trying to change for him, I just happened to meet him at this particular moment in my life when I decided to get healthy and fit for myself. \n\nMy whole point is this-- is it likely that a guy who's into fitness can be attracted to a girl who isn't particularly toned? Is my slight squish a problem?", "summary": "I met this guy online that I'm worried about meeting in person because he's into fitness and I'm a little squishy (not toned), but overall proportioned and relatively attractive. Will this be a problem?"}
{"id": "t3_qjzrf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the most profound thing you've overheard?", "post": "Gimme the goods, Reddit, what's something profound you happened to hear while dropping eaves?\n\nHere's mine:\n\nMy parents were visiting me at school this weekend. The weather was terrible, so all we did was drink and eat. On Saturday night, while killing time in a bar waiting for a dinner reservation, my dad started talking to an old man who happened to be a Vietnam War vet. My dad never talks about his experiences to anyone who doesn't have a military background, so while my mom and boyfriend were giggling and drinking, I had an ear turned towards my dad's conversation. The most he's ever told me about his time in the service was in the 6th grade for a report, and that was a stiff and uncomfortable experience. After talking about building firebases, having bleeding and cracked feet during monsoon season, and all sorts of awe inspiring things I'd never heard him breathe a word of, he told the old man that one of his buddies, who was black (and died in Vietnam), told him:\n\n> You'll know what it's like to be a nigger when you go back home.\n\nSure enough, all the stories my mom told me about my dad being spit on, and having to dig ditches because no one would hire veterans suddenly slid in to place. I've always had a huge amount of respect for my dad for never being racist, despite being caught right in the middle of the civil rights movement (we're talking about a guy who has a foot long scar down his side from being randomly stabbed with a box cutter in his high school for being white), but goddamn. This is something that'll stick with me for the rest of my life.", "summary": "Heard my dad liken his experience as a veteran to being black during the civil rights movement, hit me like a bag of bricks."}
{"id": "t3_1tc6fb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I want to quit the band I'm in, what's the best way to handle this situation?", "post": "So I'm a guitar player in a metal band. I've been in the band for about a year now and it's been really fun, but lately I just don't see it going anywhere and I am getting increasingly annoyed by my bandmates. The reason I joined was because the old guitarist who was an original member quit and they needed a new guitarist/songwriter. Since the time I've been in the band, we've gone through 2 drummers and our current drummer is alright, but he's very young and still not quite at the right skill level. Our singer is the only original member, so it's like \"his band\" but to be honest, he seems to care the least about everything. He's completely ignorant about music and about equipment and he really brings nothing to the table since he is consistently broke and not a very bright dude.\n\nThis is where the situation gets sticky. I currently live with the bass player, we have an apartment together and our lease is up in September. Our friendship is basically based off the band, so I'm afraid that if I quit, he's going to be mega pissed at me. I would try to explain how I feel about the whole situation to him but he's kind of stubborn and I predict he will throw a shit fit about the whole thing.\n\nI've worked my ass off holding this band together and I just don't see the point anymore when it's mainly me doing all the work. I do most of the writing, the band uses my van to transport gear, so that means that I am always the one driving and responsible for loading/unloading. A lot of the time I'll get fucked over by one or more of the other guys in the band and have to unload all the gear with just one other person, while the other guys go out to another show or to a bar.\n\nSorry for the wall of text, just looking for some advice to handle this situation as best as possible so I can stay friends with these guys.", "summary": "I want to quit the band I'm in currently but I live with the bass player and don't want ruin our friendship because of it."}
{"id": "t3_hiu0l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Ex asks me to be guarantor for tenancy - what would reddit do?", "post": "I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard jaggy uncomfortable place right now, and looking for a little advice from fellow redditors.\n\nMy ex and I have been divorced for about four years now.  We'd been married for over ten years and had three wonderful kids when she left and started a relationship with a woman she'd met.  At first things were very amicable, however over time I found her partner to be emotionally controlling and distanced myself from them while remaining cordial.  Somewhere along the line my ex decided she would stop my sons from seeing me, much to both my sons and my distress, which resulted in me going to court and racking up solicitor bills over the course of a year to get a contact order.\n\nLately her partner has been stressed out and doesn't want the kids in her house any more.  My ex found a house to let but asked me to be guarantor.  From everything I've read, this sounds like a terrible idea, not to mention the fact this is someone I obviously can't trust given their history, so I say no.  She manages to find another person to act as guarantor but has discovered the day before she's due to move in that they can't do it, so asks me again.  If she doesn't find someone she'll apparently lose her deposit.\n\nReddit, am I right to continue to refuse here?  I'm getting abusive texts from her partner telling me I've got a responsibility to my sons to do this, which is just the sort of s**t I'd expect from her.  My sons can always stay with me, I'd obviously never allow them be homeless... but I don't think it's right that my ex expects me to continue to underwrite her life after all that's happened?", "summary": "ex of four years wants me to sign as guarantor on property let, I don't want to but feeling pressured to do so. Am I right to stick to my guns?"}
{"id": "t3_s364i", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Reddit has become really mean.", "post": "So I've recently got the internet hooked up in my new apartment, which I live in with my girlfriend. Since doing so I've spent most of my time when not working, on reddit. Ignoring my SO while doing so. So she was complaining saying \"Now you're never going to pay any attention to me\" and half jokingly I said \"well if you're on the front page of reddit I will\".\n\n   She took this to heart made an account and a rage comic to try and do so, surprisingly it worked I noticed it and it meant a lot that she cared enough to do so. But she got really upset by the comments, people telling her she was probably not a girl, a karma whore, she should feel bad for making such a bad comic ect. I tried to explain that it was just a bunch of but-hurt bitches who cared about fake internet points a little too much but she said she didn't want to go on reddit anymore. \n\n   So I just wanted to make this self post to say fuck you all you fucking karma caring losers for scaring away a new reddit user that could have made a lot of you laugh with future comics and stories.\nAlso Thank you all of you who upvoted and said nice things of encouragement that also got her to the front page.\n\n   \n  One of the reasons I liked reddit so much when I first came here was the nice helpful community, it seems the community had changed into a bunch of little karma mining little-dicks. I'll stay because I know what reddit can be, but she wont and she might of even posted a picture to gonewild if she wasn't treated so badly for a comic(that quite frankly I've seen so many comics of people just ranting about shit in a comic just to get karma and no one says anything, those are far worse then her funny little story)", "summary": "gf made an account and comic that was popular and was offended by all the mean comments, now doesn't want to come to reddit anymore."}
{"id": "t3_nh86z", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, how can I stop myself from being so judgemental?  I swear it's getting worse ...", "post": "I try to live my life seeing the good in others, and in fact have a reputation for being 'too nice'.  I'm quick to trust, give people a second chance, and I'm happy with being that way.  But, I'm seeing myself making quick conclusions along the lines of:\n\nFat?  You must have bad hygiene, a low sense of worth and a general innability to control yourself.\n\nPoor grammer?  If you don't care about how you are perceived in text ...\n\nMildy chavvy?  No time.\n\nSo, I either need to know how to curb this before I become a miserly old git that hates people, or, learn to trust my instincts and be happy not conversing with fat chavvy folk that cannot spell, which actually sounds pretty sensible. \n\nAny sensible thoughts on the matter?", "summary": "I'm becoming more selective with people, and more inclined to judge as I get older.  Normal, or the sign of advancing Scrooge-ness?"}
{"id": "t3_zur26", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Wife [26] here.  Just found an odd text between Hubby [31] and guy he plays an MMO with... HELP!", "post": "We've been married for two years.  Just recently had a new baby (and 2 year old) Hubby has problems with gaming addiction.  We've had fights about the game and the nights he's spent staying up and gaming.  This guy he's talking to has caused fights for us because hubby gets defensive about him (the guy can do no wrong because he's NEVER met anyone he's had so much in common with).\n\nHow would you interpret this message session?\n\nHUBBY: sorry I had to jump off earlier. lots of shit happening today. Fucking car is broken down now. could just be the battery but I'm no mechanic. When it rains it pours. 7:56 PM\nOTHER DUDE: Yes it doea 8:06 PM\nOTHER DUDE: You did fall for me however 8:24 PM\nHUBBY: not sure how to take that one lol. 8:40 PM\nOTHER DUDE: Yeah mt lol 8:40 PM\nHUBBY: lol. at least I got google voice so I cant text 8:42 PM\nOTHER DUDE: Lol 8:43 PM", "summary": "Is my husband having a gay MMO affair??  Also, it will be hard for me to check up on this, but I will do so as often as I can..."}
{"id": "t3_ups5z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "GF wants kids sooner then I would like them...", "post": "I'm 23, she just turned 25, been with each other for a year and moved north together as well.\n\nWe discussed having kids before but I had mentioned getting my \"tubes tied\" and it set her off thinking about her future. Basically, she wants to settle down and start a family, but doesn't want to wait passed 30 to have kids. She wanted an answer and I told her that I cannot commit myself to that yet. She responded saying that she didn't want to wait around for me to decide...\n\nIdk what to do. I love her to death but I don't want kids, but I don't want to be the person to hold her back. I told her that the only real solution would be to separate...which I don't want :/\n\nDoesn't make things easier that we live together, but our lease is up in October and if she's seriously considering it, we have to figure something out.\n\nAnyone gone through this? I feel lost", "summary": "Gf wants kids soon, I dont, and she doesn't want to wait around. She can't decide to stay or leave"}
{"id": "t3_19rvgj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21f] feel trapped!", "post": "I [21f] feel trapped with my SO [26m], and I am not sure how to go about becoming untrapped.\n\nWe have been together for 3 years. We met in college and he is my first real boyfriend, but I am definitely not his first girlfriend. In fact, he hasnt been single since he was 13 pretty much, which should have been a red flag but of course I was in the \" I am different and can change him\" mindframe. Whatever. I have come to the conclusion that he clearly isnt going to change. He is very self-centered and set in his way. I should add that I am a social worker and he is a racist, bigoted bastard. I have an African-American friend who recently sent me an invitation to her wedding and he said he thought it was a \"help stop aids\" flyer. He is a douche. He is like a child. I spend most of my free time cleaning up after him and doing his laundry, etc. He is 26 yrs. old and can't even write a check out for himself. I know you are now asking yourself well you should obviously leave. My problem is I am originally from another state and came here for college and have 0 friends or family in my area to go to, and I dont make enough money to live on my own. He pays all of my bills and everything so I don't have to worry about that right now. To top it all off he is very unpredictable when he gets mad so I am a little afraid to stay with him until I would be able to move out. If anyone has any advise I would greatly appreciate it. I am sorry if I have left out any key information. I am not sure how to leave him and if anyone has any suggestions I would appreciate it.", "summary": "My [21f] SO [26m] of 3 years is an a-hole and I dont have the financial ability to leave."}
{"id": "t3_4dlalz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/M] Just broke up with my partner of 2 months [20/F] - Have I done the right thing?", "post": "Hi r/Relationship_Advice. \n\nSo, on Monday night I decided to end my relationship with my girlfriend of 2 months.\n\nI had been thinking about ending things for about a week or so now after doubts about whether my heart was really in it started to creep in. \n\nIt was my first *serious* relationship and although we had only been together for 2 months things things had accelerated really quickly, too quickly for me, & I honestly felt overwhelmed by the intensity of the relationship. \n\nI am a self confessed introvert and I am so used to living on my own so being plunged into a relationship was a big change for me to try and deal with - I felt suffocated.\n\nI genuinely and truly loved her and I still believe I have feelings for her but I was beginning to feel like I couldn't give the same level of commitment as her and I didn't feel it was fair of me to lead her on knowing I didn't see it lasting.\n\nI have tried my best to explain my situation it to her but I don't think she quite understands it - and maybe you guys won't either. I was just wanting to know if I had done the right thing in ending it when I did..\n\nThanks.", "summary": "Didn't see the relationship going anywhere & I didn't want to lead her on, was I right to end the relationship sooner rather than later?"}
{"id": "t3_3oh3z2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22m] with my GF [21F] of 1.5 years, can't handle I want to crossdress", "post": "So my GF and I have been dating for about 1.5 years and about 9 months into our relationship I told her I crossdress. This is something that I had done before I met her, and I felt like it was time to be more open with her and let her know this side of me if we were going to move forward.\n When I told her I wouldn't she freaked out, but she got very confused and upset. We have had multiple long talks about this and she is worried about me changing. She has told me how she wants the me she fell in love with, not someone that she doesn't know. She is most scared of me saying I want to become a women even though I say I don't.\nWe have made some progress, she is okay with me wearing panties around her and even finds it mildly attractive. However, she is convinced if I am given a free range I will change into something that is not \"her guy\". \nI believe this is an issue of her not being able to trust me, even though she does in everything else, which is frustrating to me. She also would like me to experiment with everything possibly feminine so I can find out what I want and then she will decide if she's okay with that. This is were I get very frustrated as its not possible to systematically eliminate all things that she might not be okay with, and hurts because she doesn't trust me.\n\nAm I being unreasonable for wanting her to trust me on this? I know I can't give her a definite guarantee, and I love her so much I would give it all for her (she doesn't want me to do that because she wants me to me).", "summary": "I crossdress and GF thinks this will lead to me becoming someone different, not the person she loves. I say she needs to trust me that I will always be me."}
{"id": "t3_326muu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [22F] moving to another state partially to be with a guy [34M] and now he says he doesn't want a relationship with me.", "post": "Throwaway because he's a redditor. \n\nSo my freshman year of college, I met a guy on here after posting on the sub for the city I was going to be interning in for the summer. We became friends after he found me a sublease for the summer and checked it out for me, and we and talked for a few months before I got to the city. Once I got there, he really helped me out and showed me around, and next thing you know we were going out on dates, kissing, having sex, etc. We visit each other often, still basically acting like a couple AND he has told me he loves me. Neither of us have dated anyone else over the past 4 years. The last time I saw him was about a month ago where I literally spent all of spring break with him. \n\nWell I'm graduating in a few weeks and I took a job in his city, and I'll be moving there in June. I wanted to move there anyway, but I had further motivation because of him. Last night we were talking on the phone and I mentioned that I was glad my apartment was close to him and that I was happy we could finally be together as a real couple. But then he said \"well babe, you know not like that.\" To which I said \"what do you mean? I thought that was always the plan\". And he just said \"not right now, ok? you're just young and I'm not sure it's ok, or if it's what I want.\" so I just said \"you literally told me you loved me a few hours ago, how could you say you don't want a relationship with me?\" then he didn't say anything and I got pretty upset and hung up. He called me again today but I can't even deal with talking to him right now. \n\nI just feel like I am completely stupid and naive for falling for a guy much older than me who all of a sudden seems like he doesn't even want to be with me. Am I crazy for being upset about this?", "summary": "guy I've been seeing for 4 years all of a sudden doesn't want a relationship with me even though I'm moving to a new city halfway across the country to start my career and be with him."}
{"id": "t3_x2lbi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What have you seen/heard you friends do/say which has made you doubt why you even hang out with them?", "post": "The other day, my friend was explaining to me that \"Fraping\" (Facebook/rape. Y'know, someone leaves themselves logged into FB, leaves an odd status, profile owner later claims it was \"hacked\".) a gay person would be difficult, because you would have to leave a status update saying \"I'm straight\". Apparently that wouldn't work, because it would be a \"compliment\".\n\nYeah. Apparently, if you're gay, being called \"straight\" is a compliment. I asked him, if he were gay, would he take being called gay an insult, and straight a compliment. \"Yeah, of course! Why would I want to *seem* gay?\"\n\nI had to drop the subject. He's said plenty of stupid things in the past, but he's pushing it.", "summary": "Apparently it's an insult to be called gay, and a compliment to be called straight, regardless of whether you're actually gay or straight."}
{"id": "t3_1n4qbk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend still hasn't proposed. Should I be concerned? (6 years) 29F+29M", "post": "I've brought up the idea of getting married and having kids before and he's indicated that he'd like these things as well but he's never even hinted at proposing before.  Should I be concerned? I know I'm more than ready to take the next step in our relationship and he's definitely the person I want to spend the rest of my life with.\n\nOther than this, the relationship is perfect.  He's good looking, smart, funny, and sweet.  He treats me like a princess and he's always surprising me with spontaneous romantic gestures.  It's not like I need him to propose to validate his love for me; I know that we're the loves of each other's lives and we'll spend the rest of our lives together, married or not.  I'm just a little upset because if he does want kids and marriage like he says he does, why hasn't he proposed to me yet?  Am I overanalyzing?  Is this ok for me to bring up more directly?  Sometimes I'll playfully hint at us getting married and he'll play along but it never goes past playful teasing.", "summary": "My BF hasn't proposed after 6 years of an awesome relationship.  He says he wants marriage and kids in the future.  Should I be concerned?"}
{"id": "t3_m0m99", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Apathy Vs. Activism", "post": "A friend and I were talking about the Occupy Wall Street movement and the presence of business in government.  After much back-and-forthing of ideals and motivations and background of the movement, he ending the conversation by saying:\n\n\"This is stupid anyways.  What's the point of getting all up in arms over it? Protesting is not going to do anything at all.  It's best to just let the government take its natural course and fall apart just like all the other governments.  We're just regular people.  We can't do anything\".  \n\nThis, of course,  spawned an entirely NEW argument, but it got me thinking.\n\n-Is this apathetic attitude popular among people? (I'm around college kids all day, so I'm in a bubble).  \n-Is it better to let the government just \"run its course\"?", "summary": "My friend thinks OWS is stupid because we're normal people and have no power, and that we should just let government \"run its course\""}
{"id": "t3_ytwui", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I saw a guy miss out on 20,000 cash and 25,000 in home makeovers, only to win a shake-weight. What's the most gut-wrenching/humiliating thing you've ever seen?", "post": "We had a foreign exchange student from Austrailia come to play basketball at our school, and he had a sort of bucket list of things to do while he was \"in the states.\" One of them was to see an NBA game in person. So I bought four of us tickets to go watch the Memphis Grizzlies at home play the New Jersey Nets (killer matchup.) it was around Christmas, so at half time they called a seat for te audience to come pick between three presents, a tall, medium, or small gift wrapped box. Once he meandered down from his seat, they informed him there were two money prizes and one item. He picks the smallest of the boxes. They let him open the tallest; 20,000 in cash. Disappointed. He opens the middle box; 25,000. More disappointment, but left with a glimmer of hope in store for the his present.   He pulls back the top and his eyes feast upon a shake-weight. Crushed.\n\nHe hung his head low, but kneeled to the ground and gave the shake-weight the most solemn shaking I've ever seen while walking back to his seat.", "summary": "Fan gets to pick box 1, 2, or 3. Hidden prizes are 20k cash, 25k for house, or shakeweight. Wins a mother fucking shakeweight."}
{"id": "t3_3afl3k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[16 M] just found out my best friend[16 M]of 3 three years is in love with me and i don't know what to do.", "post": "So i just found out that my best friend wants to be romantically involved with me.\n\nThe big problem is that we are both dudes and i'm straight so i don't want to be in a relationship with him but has been my best bro for years and he really helped me through some tough times. \n\nWe had a talk about it and it turns out that he is, according to him, head over heels in love with me and he has assured me that he isn't confused or going through a phase and that his feelings are genuine.\n\nI told him that i was no longer comfortable being his best friend and he responded by telling me how he still wanted to hang out with me even through i didn't want to because he didn't want to lose me. However after that he told me something that worried me; apparently when we first met he hated me as he felt i was stealing his best friend (who is now my best friend) and he has had those types of feelings for all his previous best friends. It worries me because he appears to be very possessive towards his best friends and he wants to keep them all to himself.\n \nhe has also done a number of creepy things like asking a female friend of ours to let him sleep in her bed with her and cuddle. He has also joked about raping me a lot over the few years we were best friends and i always thought he playing up to the fact that everyone at our school called us gay or maybe he liked making uncomfortable jokes like that. \n\nThroughout most of our friendship he has wanted to sleep with me and this is a dude that i have shared bedrooms with and now i'm scared that he may have done something creepy while i was asleep. I can't trust him anymore. \n\nThis entire altercation has also split our very close group of friends apart and i need some unbiased opinions on what actions to take as i'm now having to try and convince my friends that i'm not homophobic or a liar. The worse part is that out of the five people in our friendship circle only one person doesn't know about it.", "summary": "So to conclude i need some unbiased opinions on what to do when your best friend is in love with you. Any advice will be helpful."}
{"id": "t3_119rvc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you deal with an unprofessional apartment manager?", "post": "Couldn't find a good subreddit for this\n\nI live with my fianc\u00e9 and a male roommate. Things are not bad at all. We like where we live and most of our neighbors are really great. My problem stems from the apartment manager. She is rude, unprofessional and seriously starting to get on my nerves. \nThe way we have it set up (between the 3 of us) is that I take care of the house and I am the one who notifies the manager about issues and all of that kind of thing. She has been told multiple times that I am the one to get in touch with about any apartment related things. \n\nShe refuses. I can call her a dozen times and leave message after message and she refuses to get back to me. But she has no problem calling either my roommate or my fianc\u00e9 back. In fact there have been times where I was calling everyday for 2 weeks and heard nothing from her, (the matter was about resigning our lease) my fianc\u00e9 called\u2026and she called him back within 5 minutes. \n\nShe not only completely ignores me and ignores the guys when they tell her to call me, she flirts endlessly with my fianc\u00e9. Asking him out to do things and all of that to which he *always* tells her no. I'm not jealous\u2026but I am getting pissed over the disrespect she is showing not only to my face but behind my back. Now, I also happen to know that she does this with every other couple in the apartment complex. Ignores the woman and hits on the man. \n\nI just don't know what to do about her anymore. Anybody ever have to deal with this, or know how to deal with this. It has been going on (and getting worse) over the past two years. \n\nNote: We don't want to move because right now we can't afford any other place. And like where we live.", "summary": "The apartment manager actively ignores me and constantly hits on my fianc\u00e9, even after repeated discussions with her about it. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3dnakp", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[MI] What can I do about my year old forgery felony?", "post": "Hey all, I'm not sure if there is even anything I can do with my case, but at this point I am willing to try anything. I was a treasurer for a student accounting society for my university, and when some financial hardship hit, I made the idiotic decision to use my availability of funds to help front some money, with the intent to pay it back. However, before I was able to fully pay it back, the academic advisor of the group took notice and turned it over the university police who took it to the county. I was up front with all of my information and did not try to hide anything from them, knowing that they had access to all copies of the checks and had talked to the other student board members. August 14th, 2014 I was sentenced for a felony count of forgery through a county court. Being 23 and dealing with this completely on my own, I had to take a court appointed attorney, who was able to get the prosecutor to drop the other counts of forgery and embezzlement. In total, the amount in question was $4,000 which was paid as restitution in full amount on the date of sentencing. I never spent time in jail besides the 6 hours while I was waiting arraignment, I never had probation or any other court ordered conditions I unfortunately did not look into the possible pros of hiring an attorney versus taking a court appointed one, and now at 24, cannot find work. I took a year off from school in order to get my life somewhat together, I found a low paying job that did not background check, but as I approach completion of school, I am afraid of the non-existence of finding a job that will allow me to survive on my own. I know that 5 years after sentencing I can apply for expungement, but that also means I just wasted my time finishing school if I can't even find a job. Some may say that I got off easy, but looking into other similar cases, I see that restitution was paid and charges were dropped. I am just ready to move on with my life and try and bounce back from this but I feel like I'm trying to swim up a waterfall.", "summary": "I have a year old forgery felony charge, I want to see if its possible to reverse, appeal, or early expunge it"}
{"id": "t3_2ujoxu", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [23m] feel like a therapist for one of my best friends [21f]", "post": "I met 21f through a buddy almost two years ago shortly before moving away. We became good pals through facetime and texting pretty regularly. Last May I moved to a new city and we Would facetime daily since I didn't know\nMany people. It was a huge help. She's had a rough couple of months with a family member passing, I was there for her more than the guy she was seeing even though I'm Six hours away. Lately though, I've started to feel more and more like a therapist to her as she often will ask me for advice, what do to and if she can do certain things. \n\nIt's getting to be a bit much for me to the point I just told her how I feel this morning. She has some additional issues which I won't get into but has now\nTold me she feels bad and won't talk about things anymore. I've tried to talk about things I'm excited about and will often not get a reply or the subject will get changed, I show interest in what she is doing when she's excited. Things just seem one sided and I'm getting tired of it.", "summary": "I feel like a therapist for a good friend and told her. She feels bad and now doesn't want to talk about things."}
{"id": "t3_1ejlaa", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Not sure if this is the right subreddit! (Not sure what to title this)", "post": "A couple months ago, I bought a Cyborg M.M.O. 7 (computer mouse). Nothing out of the ordinary. A few weeks ago, it started double-clicking and the scroll wheel was starting to malfunction. I then sent it back to the company to have it replaced, and they agreed to do so. This week I got a package from Mad Catz, the company that owns Cyborg, and it was another M.M.O. 7! However, they've changed the model, and I really don't like it. It doesn't lay flat on the ground (it's wobbly), and the precision button on the side doesn't work without the plugin (it worked before). \n\nI'd love to know if I can do something about it, like get it replace or something.", "summary": "Bought a mouse, it broke. While it was getting replaced, the company changed the model. I don't like it. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4vba4h", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "19 years old, saved over 20k what to do (NZ)", "post": "Hi. I've been working for over a year now and managed to save a decent amount of money (20k+). I currently still live with the parents, therefore don't pay a huge amount for rent etc hence why I'm able to save so efficiently. Also because I don't waste money on stuff I consider unnecessary (partying etc).\n\nWell anyway. I'm currently working a pretty cool job, though, it is getting a bit boring and I want to start my apprenticeship in a civil trade next year as my current job has barely any opportunities for the future. My plan is to move city next year and start my apprenticeship, which obviously would cost more in living expenses. Luckily with trades apprenticeships you get paid as you learn, therefore I won't get in-debt or struggle to pay bills . With that being said I don't imagine me chewing up all of my savings, therefore what is the best way to use my money wisely. I still would like to have some spending money and have a bit in the savings account for living expenses (especially for next year), but am not extremely worried as I will be getting getting paid as I learn.\nIf you wise men of personal finance reddit were my age with the amount of money I have what would you do with it?", "summary": "Have 20k, current cost of living is low (will be higher next year). What to wisely do with the 20k to assist me in future."}
{"id": "t3_2ixyco", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by banging my co-worker", "post": "I work with a large group of people. We all came from different parts of the country to do the same thing, so naturally our shared experience made us all pretty close friends. Well, a few nights ago, we're all out as a group (about 50 of us), getting tanked and listening to live music. The night takes us all our seperate ways and with our seperate smaller groups of friends. I end up with one of my closest friends here and a few others. This girl is VERY attractive, I'd say out of my league. While I've always been attracted to her, it's never been like, something I've pursued because of the fact we work very closely together, and I genuinely just enjoy her company. Well... After a night fueled by fireball, friend and I end up drunkenly (very, very drunkenly) boning. \n\nthe next morning, we wake up, everything seems... Alright. We laugh it off, say everything is cool and that's that. Fast forward to that evening, our large group is out for a birthday party. Instantly I can tell things are awkward. She won't make eye contact with me, and we don't talk. At all. Which is weird. I make the rounds, say goodnight, and go home. \n\nWell, now it's the next morning and I'm sitting here trying to figure out how to salvage this situation. Sorry it's not humorous, or super cringeworthy, but any guidance others might have in a similar situation would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "drunkenly Banged a super hot friend/co-worker. Wondering how to move past it for our friendship."}
{"id": "t3_2blp1y", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Need advice about a medical settlement", "post": "Hello, I am in Texas and having an issue with my father about a medical settlement from when I was younger. When I was just a little boy, 5 or so, I had an accident at a hospital that doctor's thought would physically disable me for the rest of my life. \n\nLong story short, the hospital was found at fault and there was a settlement reached on my behalf including increasing payments every month for basically my entire life, as well as lump sums every few years.\n\nMy issue stems with my dad who is controlling all of the money, I am much older now, over 25, and he will not release any information about it to me. Any time that I ask him about it, he just talks a bunch of gibberish confusing me. In the past he had said I would get it when I was of age, which I had just assumed meant 18 or 21, and it was no big deal. \n\nHowever, now that I am older than my assumptions, he still will not tell me anything about it. I recently found a document that outlined some of the settlement (It seemed to be some sort of draft) that had a lawyers name on it and gave her a call, where she referred me to another lawyer who has not gotten back to me in about 2 months.\n\nAnyway, I am just curious about what I actually need to do. I don't want to ruin my relationship with my dad over it, cause he is actually a pretty great dad, but what other recourse do I have than to find a lawyer or something? I now have bills and a kid on the way, and access to that money would be fairly helpful in resolving some things.", "summary": "Settlement from a hospital due to their negligence when I was very young that my dad is holding back from me and won't give me any info about."}
{"id": "t3_3emeh5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my boyfriend [21M] of a year-ish, one time boyfriend, one time casual boyfriend has moved on and now I don't know what to do?", "post": "So I dated this guy for about five months, we mutually decided that we didn't have much in common so we ended it. We didn't talk for two months and then we ran into each other at a party and hooked up about three months ago. Over the past three months we've been taking it casually. Mostly just hookups but also a lot of dinners, movies and concerts. I've been kinda falling for him. I've been learning new things about him, things I somehow didn't know the first time we dated.\n\nA few hours ago though, I watched his snapchat story and it was a picture of him kissing this cute guy on the cheek with the caption \"best date of my life\".\nI just feel empty. I didn't realize how much I liked him until I saw him with another guy. I feel so worthless. I want to cry but I can't for some reason.\nThis whole time he was over me and I thought I was too but I don't think I ever dealt with it. And now all I can think about is what might have been and how much time I've wasted on a guy who seemingly doesn't care about me.\n\nThis keeps happening to me. I keep falling for guys who keep me at arms length. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know why I'm submitting this. I guess I'm looking for advice or experience.", "summary": "Had a casual fling for three months with an ex boyfriend, accidentally fell for him, now he's moved on and I don't know how to not feel so terrible."}
{"id": "t3_38jp0u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [46 M] with my wife [37 F] married 8 years, wife had \"affair\" with former boss, now wants reference from him", "post": "My wife recently had a few-weeks \"emotional affair\" with her boss. I'm not sure it was really an \"emotional affair\", because they didn't talk about anything except work. On the other hand, it wasn't merely infatuation on her part, because he knew her feelings and reciprocated somehow. I gathered all this from what she told me, because I have no independent evidence to go on.\n\nAnyway, her latest contact with this character was an (innocuous) email exchange just after she quit the job (which was temporary), in which she asked if he could provide a reference for future job applications, and he agreed.\n\nAfter this, she confessed to me about this thing and insisted that it was all in the past. She agreed not to contact him again and not to reply if he contacted her, which (apparently) he hasn't.\n\nThe problem is that she is now thinking of applying for her next temporary job and has already updated her CV with details of her last employer, naming this guy as a referee.  I'm not exactly happy about this because it could provide an excuse for him to contact her. Even if he doesn't contact her, writing a reference effectively gives him some kind of power to be helpful to her. (I know because I often write references for people at work.) This is a sensitive topic because apparently the main reason she fell for him is that he was soooo helpful at work.\n\nMy wife doesn't see this as a problem because the agent or new employer (not she) would be contacting him for a reference, and she thinks it would look strange/suspicious if she omitted this detail from her job application. I suggested simply stating truthfully that the name is omitted for personal reasons, but she thinks that would also look strange.\n\nWhat is the best thing to do in this situation?", "summary": "Wife had \"affair\" with former boss, regretted it and stopped contact, but now wants reference for new job application. Is it appropriate to name former boss as referee?"}
{"id": "t3_3hu4gb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "27[f] Ran into guy who I went out on a date with a couple of years ago. Want to try again, but is it possible to proceed?", "post": "About two years ago I asked a guy out from one of my classes. He accepted and we went out on a great date. He mentioned he had thought about asking me out but was too chicken to do it. Talked for hours, messed up and did a funny good night kiss, and he said he wanted to do it again. \n\nSo we went out on a second date to a movie. Another great date and driving me home he was so excited. Asking \"when can he see me again?\", \"can he see me this weekend,\" \"let's go to a museum and have a really wonderful time.\" Things like that. I go on dates and I can tell when someone is into to me or not. He was into me. I kissed me good night, and was excited to see him again.\n\nA couple of days before our next date I asked to confirm plans and he said \"we could still go out as friends sometime but he didn't have time for anything else right now\" I said \"I said, I understand maybe some other time then\" and that was that. \n\nSo yesterday I ran into him in the street, he told me just moved to my neighborhood. He seemed not unhappy to talk to me, and he remembered lots of things we talked about. He smiled a lot and was really friendly. Anyways I am still totally into him I discovered after we bumped into each other. Is there any way I can proceed? \n\nSince he called it off last time should I just let it go? Can I ask if he wants to hang out again sometime? Even as friends? Would it be creepy to add him on facebook? Anyways main question, should I just let it go?", "summary": "Want another date with a guy I went out with a couple of years ago, should I just give it up though?"}
{"id": "t3_2fenvb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I (22/f) message an old crush(22/m) from hs?", "post": "Recently Ive run into an old crush twice.  Both times were an accident but they were both at a place he worked. Each time he saw me first and started a conversation.  Although the second time it was a little more business related. Anyway both times he made laugh and smile and brought back feelings from hs. We  basically lost touch after hs. But we are Facebook friends and I know hes single. \n\nBackstory: we were friends in hs and had p.e together.  I think he asked me to prom  senior year but I didn't take it seriously because he said it jokingly.  The next day he asked my friend who he wasn't even as close with.  So I always kinda assumed he actually had meant to ask me. So I know at some point he probably sorta liked me.", "summary": "ran into a crush at his place of work twice. Now I want to ask him to hang out to catch up. But don't know the best way to do it or what to say."}
{"id": "t3_29x233", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my gf [19 F] of 4 months, thinking I could probably do better and feeling guilty about it.", "post": "So I've been with my gf for 4 months now and in the beginning I was so excited to get with her cause we had been friends for a while and I always thought she would be awesome to hook up with. However, things have not gone as planned. She acts very open and adventurous about things so I thought sex would be the same but it's not, the sex is very vanilla. \n\nOn top of that, I'm starting to think I could find a more attractive partner. I mean my current gf is cute, but for a long term relationship I would prefer to have a girl that wows me every time I look at her or think about her.\n\nMy current gf is a great friend, and gets along well with the guys but she's just not... Sexy I guess is the word. Idk I feel selfish and shallow for writing all this, but I'm being honest. Has anyone experienced something similar? Know if I'm just making something out of nothing or panicking? Any advice or thoughts are welcome.", "summary": "my gf, although smart ambitious and fun, is pretty bland sexually and I'm starting to think I could find someone far more physically attractive. Is this wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_3vftpd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[28m] girlfriend[27f]'s posted sex tapes online with her ex[23m]", "post": "I don't know what the hell to do. I made an account to post this here. Girlfriend and I have been together for a year. \n\nOn my main reddit account I had got gotten a lot of karma from a big post. I never showed my girlfriend reddit before, but I wanted to show off how popular my post had gotten. She told me she was familiar with reddit, that her ex actually showed her the website. \n\nIn my competitive nature, I wanted to see if I had more karma than him. I asked her, his username and she told me that it was probably the same as his Instagram. I went on to see his profile\u2026 all of his posts were in gonewild subreddits. I started looking back this guy's dick was twice the size of mine. \n\nNot only that he had posts up of my girlfriend. There was a gif of my girlfriend giving him a blow job (Her eyes/face are blurred out but I can tell by everything else its her), and then her swallowing it all and smiling. This is something she has NEVER done for me. If she does give me a blow job which isn't often she runs to the bathroom like she has battery acid in her mouth. And now here she is doing it lovingly for this other guy.  \n\nThere were other things too, there was one of him with my girlfriend and another girl. All of this was a shock to me. My girlfriend has not ever been that sexual of a person with me. She always told me she wasn't like that kind of girl, that her idea of a fun night was cuddling and watching a movie. However, looking at this she was this other guy's bedroom acrobat.\n\nAfter watching the videos, I asked her if she would ever be interested in spicing up our sex life. I asked her if she would be interested in some of the stuff I saw on the posts of her. She got mad at me and said does she look like a prostitute.", "summary": "there are videos of my girlfriend online that show her enjoying sex with her ex. In the video she does a lot of stuff she has never done with me."}
{"id": "t3_2kb9et", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] have been on a few dates with [26 M]. Starting to like him but should I be concerned about the age gap?", "post": "Will try to keep this short. Went on a date with someone we'll call Jeff over the summer. I had a blast - he was incredibly sweet, we had great conversations, and I ended up staying the night at his place cuddling most of the night (among other things). We would have seen each other again right after that, but that week I had to return to school several states away. We stayed in contact, texting a few times a week and promising to see each other again once I was home.  \n\nFast forward to now. I ended up going on another date with him a few days ago, which went even better than the first. I admitted to him that I was starting to like him and he returned the sentiment. \n\nHowever, I'm finding myself concerned about the age gap (~7 years) between us. Jeff is really sweet, sensible, holds a steady job and really has his shit together. I'm just second year in college. I'm painfully aware of how much I have matured in the last year alone and I'm not sure if I should be worried that someone who has had 7 more years to mature and develop would be interested in me. When I asked him if he made a habit of dating 19 year olds, he said no, never, but that \"if two people connect, they connect.\" \n\nI definitely agree with him there, but I also know I'm young and have a *lot* more growing up to do. I guess I'm just wondering what kind of 26 year old would be interested in someone so immature. I keep thinking there must be something wrong with him for this to be the case, even though he seems to be the perfect guy. As I only have my perspective on this, I don't know if this is normal or not. \n\n**I guess my question for reddit is, is it automatically a red flag for this guy to be into me? Other redditors in their mid twenties, would you consider dating someone my age?", "summary": "Went on a few dates with an amazing guy, worried that him being interested in someone as young as me is a red flag. Could use some advice."}
{"id": "t3_4hf0hc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with SO [27M], he's complacent/satisfied with sex life, I'm not.", "post": "I [27F] have been in a relationship with SO for ~5 yrs. When we were first dating, sex was more experimental and varied. Now it's routine - same 3-4 positions, same sequence of events. Still feels good, but kinda boring. I've actually told SO that I wished we could have more variety in our sex life. He's not against it per se but I'm coming up with all the ideas so sometimes it feels like he's not super into it or just doing things to humor me. \n\nSO says that what we do now works for him and I guess he doesn't feel the need to try anything else. No secret unfulfilled fetishes or anything like that,  I've asked repeatedly and promised not to judge. I can respect his preferences but it's weird to me that his attitude towards sex seems so vanilla now when he was more into experimenting at the beginning of our relationship. \n\nIn his defense, he's been at a demanding job for the last two years. But does that mean sex for him has become an afterthought?  I love him but he's not changing careers so is this it??", "summary": "Seems like SO doesn't care about the quality or variety of sex, just wants me to scratch the itch so he can get on with his day"}
{"id": "t3_2jmy0w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my 26 [F] 6 months, we're having weight issues", "post": "So I began dating a girl six months ago. Really nice girl, we are opposite but attract all good.\n\nWhen we met she told me she was a sports starlet in her youth. I thought it was cool but it didn't impact how I felt about her all that much.\n\nNow I have been trying to get in better shape myself for on off the last year, and I told her this when we met. One day about three months in she said she had decided to do the same, and explained how she used to be in great shape, super hot and had let herself go, showing me pictures etc.\n\nI was pleased for her and asked her to keep me posted on how it goes. So she keeps telling me she's doing all these things, classes, runs, etc, yet there's literally been no change in three months. Whenever we end up eating, she's usually having some kind of fast food or savoury food.\n\nI've dropped some weight and I'm looking good. Meanwhile her stories are getting less and less.\n\nI really don't know how to bring this up without sounding like a dick. It's also lead me to question whether we can move forward because I want a partner that takes care of themselves and she just doesn't seem to be doing so or even want to.", "summary": "Girl I'm dating said she wanted to get in shape. Keeps telling me she's working out but nothing's changed."}
{"id": "t3_215tlh", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Heading to Brazil this summer! What are the must-sees and the off-the-beaten-track gems?", "post": "My family is headed to Brazil for the World Cup this summer and we're starting to set our itinerary. Here is what we know (pretty much revolves around where we have tickets):\n\n- Salvador for the Germany v Portugal game on 6/16\n- Fortaleza for Germany v Ghana on 6/21\n- (Probably) Recife for Germany v USA on 6/26\n\nWe don't know where we'll be for the round of 16 and quarterfinal games, but it looks like we'll be moving around between Sao Paulo, Brasilia, and Rio starting July 1.  Our plans also will include Iguazu Falls at some point.\n\n**What I'm asking**\n\n- Are there any must-sees in the country that I'm missing?\n- What might be some good, interesting day trips I can take from any of those cities?  We like outdoorsy hiking type activities, beautiful landscapes and wildlife, interesting cultural anecdotes, good food...\n- What are some hidden gems in any of those cities (like good restaurants, market places, neighborhoods) that may not show up in a travel book?\n- Logistical advice on getting around, what to look for in choosing hotels (like which neighborhoods?), etc.  We saw that there is a Brazil air pass which we will probably purchase, but any other thoughts are welcome.\n\nI've ordered the NatGeo travel book, Fodor's Brazil 2014 (World Cup edition), as well as Fodor's: Rio, Best 25.  If I'm missing a good one, let me know!\n\nNo specific budget, but let's keep it reasonable :)\n\nThank you!\n\n*<", "summary": "> Looking for secret gems of all sorts in Brazil, specifically in the cities of Rio, Sao Paulo, Recife, Brasilia, Fortaleza, and Salvador.*"}
{"id": "t3_288mb5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A question for guys: Do you do these things when you are interested in someone?", "post": "I have a guy friend who I made recently and he asks to hang out a lot and whenever we go grab a bite he offers to pay. I always say no but sometimes he is very persistent. He also tries to hug me a lot and texts me rather often. I've just recently met him at work so I find his behaviour a bit odd because even though we're friends, I'm still getting to know him and I don't feel close enough to him to be so touchy feely. Also, I think he may be interested in me, which if he is, I don't want to lead him on but I also don't want him to think I don't appreciate his friendship. I do enjoy hanging out with him but just as a friend.\n\nHow do I know if he likes me or is just being friendly? How do I set boundaries without being rude? He is fun to hangout with but I'm not a sentimental person and I don't like being touched. I am also not attracted to him at all.\n\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "If a new guy friend asks to hang out a lot  and pay for things does he like you? How do I make it clear I don't like him and can't accept his gifts? We are both 19."}
{"id": "t3_3httd1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by eating tzatziki", "post": "Obligatory this was when I was in high school. \n\nSo, for those of you who don't know, in Boston there's a shopping area called Haymarket. To all the tourists in the area, it's just Faneuil Hall, which is the crazy cramped food court building in the center of the area. You can get all kinds of foods there, ranging from Irish pub to mediocre Chinese food to sushi to Gelato. My personal favorite is currently the mac and cheese shop, but that's not the point.\n\nWhen I was in high school and come into Boston on my own, I would always make a bee line to the Greek shop in Faneuil Hall. During my first time there, I noticed the food item called \"tzatziki - a kind of Greek yogurt.\" Coming from East Bumfuck, NH, I didn't know much about many other cultures' food stuffs, but I certainly knew about Greek yogurt!\n\nI don't know why I choose this, because I hated yogurt at the time (\"it has live bacteria in it!\" I can't explain the logic in that argument if I tried,) but I decided to order it. The people at the counter looked at me and were like, \"Okay, tzatziki aaaaaand?\" And then I cheerfully replied with, \"Oh, and a Nantucket Nectar!\"\n\nThey just looked at me, reached into the display case, and slid the solid near-2 cup tub of tzatziki over to me. I bounced up and down in excitement, gave them some money (and told them to keep the change! I'm a good person!) And bounced upstairs to eat lunch with a spoon. It tasted great, but after like five or more bites it caused that reaction where your body is just like, \"Okay, you need to cool it with that stuff.\"\n\nI proceeded to order tzatziki every time I went to Faneuil Hall for a solid year. I couldn't figure out why everyone around me looked at me with mild disgust/bewilderment. Until I looked at the ingredient list for an online recipe for tzatziki.", "summary": "I sat by myself in one of the most cramped sections of Boston eating the Greek equivalent of mayonnaise with a spoon. A lot."}
{"id": "t3_1zjwk9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24M] with my girlfriend [33F] of 2 months, trying to support her in a male dominated career/industry/workplace.", "post": "This conversations started the other day with me explaining to my girlfriend that a pair of glasses she usually wears are particularly unattractive (which, I believe, is true and she agrees). This turned in to something much more.\n\nShe tells me that the job she started 3-4 months ago is male-dominated and she feels as if she's constantly being \"stared at\" and wants to be treated as a regular employee. She says that she wears unattractive glasses because she feels as if she's taken more seriously by being deliberately \"non-sexy\" which I absolutely understand. She then began crying and saying how much she hates it and that she has to deal with garbage truck drivers frequently who she feels like are staring at her in a potentially sexual nature.\n\nIt absolutely breaks my heart to hear these things and I'm completely lost on how to support her, which I want to desperately. Quitting her job is a non-option as it's an opportunity she has been working for the past 5-6 years and is a massive career breakthrough for her.\n\nAny advice? Thank you!", "summary": "Girlfriend feels she needs to appear unattractive at work in order to be taken seriously. How can I support her?"}
{"id": "t3_44jd7m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[33M] want to ask a coworker [33F]of one month out but I don't know if my behavior has lowered my chances.", "post": "There is this woman I worked with that I felt an attraction towards.  The work we did didn't allow for much conversation so let's just say I know next to nothing about her.  \n\nThere are some things she does that makes me think she is interested in me.  For example, I notice her looking at me quite often.  Also, she seems kind of shy around me.\n\nHowever, there are somethings that she also does that makes me think she doesn't like me.  She has never made an attempt to talk to me.  And she sometimes seems uncomfortable around me.  I'm not sure if this is due to her shyness or if she genuinely does not like me.\n\nOne day I got into a fight with the boss and abruptly quit.  No one at work, including the girl that I liked, knows why I quit.\n\nBut about a month after I returned to work working on a different shift.  I know longer saw the girl that I liked except once in a while when we change shifts.  One time I was late and running into the workplace when I saw her walking towards the bathroom.  Immediately I made a left turn so it looked like I was avoiding her.\n\nIn my peripheral vision I saw her waving towards me but I ignored it.  I think this might have been seen as my rejection of her.  I've since realized what a huge mistake it was because it would have given me a chance to clear the air about my reasons for quitting.  \n\nNow i want to give her my number and have her call me to see if we can have something outside of work.  I'm not sure if what I did was bad enough that she has just turned off towards the idea of going out with me.", "summary": "Want to ask a girl out at work but don't know if some of the things I've done have turned her off.  Should I take a chance and give her my number and have her call me?"}
{"id": "t3_3xiud3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] in a 1 year relationship, girl wants to take it to the next level", "post": "Okay everyone, I created a reddit account to ask you all for some advice. I've been dating a great girl for almost a year, we get along great and we're both in college, living in separate apartments, and have different groups of friends. \n\nI'm fairly introverted in the sense that being with someone for extended periods of time is exhausting. Because we have such different lives, we only spend 3-5 days a week together and communicate through text/etc when we are apart. This works for us and I rarely get sick of seeing her.\n \nNow however, she wants to take our relationship to the next level and has told me she wants to find a place and move in together. I don't want this at all because I need my alone time and the personal space that living separately gives me. She is very insistent and any mention of my concerns ends with her stating that I dont love her, etc etc. \n\nAs stated I am still very young and I'm not ready for this.\n-Am I selfish or are my thoughts reasonable?\n-How do I tell her I don't want this without it ruining our relationship?", "summary": "Girlfriend wants to live together, I'm not ready for that level of commitment -- how to I tell her this?"}
{"id": "t3_4tbdml", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Above minimum wage Jobs that require no degree?", "post": "I'm in debt due to student loans (yay) and I'd like to go back to school for something I'd actually enjoy pursing a career in. But since my 18 year dumb ass thought graphic design was a great idea in 2008, I'm stuck with a worthless associates degree in graphic design from the art institutes. \n\nIdeally I'd want to be a piercer, taxidermist, working with animals in some aspect, dead people/dead animals, or something that requires an artistic touch. But I have no connections to help me with an apprenticeship for piercing so that's out, I can't go back to school due to debt, and my town is very small and the only jobs I've found that are artistic in any way are screen printing jobs but they only pay minimum wage and are on the opposite side of town. \n\nI guess the", "summary": "version is: Is there any way I can obtain a job in any of the above mentioned career paths without having to go back to school because getting any sort of school loan is not possible for me."}
{"id": "t3_16h9wk", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/m] In a relationship with (20/f) and I need help..", "post": "So I met this girl who's a sophomore my first semester of college and we hit it off really well and became \"official\" towards the end of the semester. She lives 3.5 hours away so I haven't gotten to see her too much since our winter break started. I visited once and it was great meeting her family and friends and I'm looking forward to seeing her again this Tuesday.\n\nAnyway...this is only my second relationship and my first was awful because my ex was very manipulative and cheated on me twice and unfortunately I let her walk all over me because I thought I was being \"nice\". That one lasted for about a year. I never did anything to wrong my ex and she always talked about how I was \"the best bf ever because I actually treated her right\" and then shit happened anyway...this has kinda made me a bit worried about things with my current gf for no reason.\n\nWe've only known each other for a few months but we're already very comfortable together and act weird all the time and it's great. I was very hesitant about things with her because I consider her \"out of my league\" but apparently she's actually attracted to me (I wouldn't say I'm very attractive) but the biggest thing I get from her friends is that I'm actually a nice guy unlike previous bf's.\n\nThe problem is that I get these irrational thoughts of her cheating on me (since I'm not around during breaks) and I get depressed and everything just seems so difficult. It's not like \"she hasn't texted me back in 10 minutes...she's cheating\". It doesn't happen very often thank goodness and I'm dealing with it a lot better than I would've almost a year ago after the last relationship but I'd prefer if it didn't happen at all. My friends are the best because I can talk to them about this (and I do) but I thought I would get some feedback from /r/relationship_advice.", "summary": "I have a fantastic relationship with a girl and I would like to know how to deal with my irrational fears of cheating because I'm worried they might prevent me from seeing what I have right now..."}
{"id": "t3_18mh8b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend(M17) began ignoring me(F18) without explanation, and suddenly wants me to call him, argument ensues. UPDATE", "post": "New account, forgot the other throw away account password.\n\nOriginal Post [Here] (\n\nThanks to everyone who gave me advice on this. I appreciate it! I regarded it but there wasn't much to go off of other than \"he's crazy, don't stick your dick in crazy\" or whatever. (I appreciate it none the less). \nWe messaged for a few hours or so. I got defensive and I retaliated and things got very heated. He ended up cutting contact with me and it felt pretty awful. I said things I didn't mean and lost a good friend. In a sense, I felt smothered by him and I said it. He put out that he just wanted to enjoy my company. I'm really confused because I know I didn't go about this the right way and I want to at least be on good terms with him. \nI'm not sure I can after the things we said to each other. \nI'm not sure I should even say anything. I value our friendship but he constantly tried to act like a boyfriend. \nI don't know what to do.", "summary": "Good friend of 2 years cut contact with me, I feel absolutely awful. Would contacting him make things help or hinder our relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_3qjgkb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 F] with my exbf [24 M] for 2 years, broke up 2 years ago.", "post": "So today it finally happened. My ex hit me up after two years. I decided to respond to his \"hey\" to be nice and fix any animosity between us (relationship didnt end well), and see how he was doing and where he was in life. \n\nHe started saying things like \"wow you look so different in your pictures. like in a good way\" and \"is that you in that pic? idk. its someone.\" and its really bothering me. He is acting cold and unfriendly. Any advice? I am feeling a great deal of anxiety waiting for his replies, I can't even sleep. And it kind of hurts how he thinks im barely recognizable. Am I being overly sensitive? Am I reading too much into it?", "summary": "feeling anxious/hurt that my exbf (2 years ago) barely recognizes me from my pictures. am i being stupid."}
{"id": "t3_n6d24", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Would you feel comfortable with this transaction?", "post": "I'm dealing with an Internet company who buys junked/damaged cars. \n\nThey have made an offer on my beat-up truck. I'm fine with the offer but it's not outrageous or suspicious. \n\nThey wish for me to sign the title and fax them a copy. After this, they will dispatch a local driver to pick up the vehicle, title, and give me a check. \n\nObviously I'm exposed in accepting a check. However, their site appears legit and my phone interactions with them have set off no red flags. \n\nI've also Googled the company, without seeing posts from people claiming to have been scammed. \n\nIt is a relatively small amount of money in play here and it just seems like it would be a hell of a long scam just to get my old truck. \n\nWhat are your thoughts Reddit?  I have left out the name of the company because I wasn't certain whether that was frowned upon. I can provide it if requested. I hope this question is thought provoking enough for Askreddit but I really wanted the opinion of the community.", "summary": "Out of state company wants to buy my old truck. I send copy of title, then they come pick up and pay with check. Legit?"}
{"id": "t3_tyj3l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it selfish to love someone just because they love you?", "post": "I met a guy at a gaming convention and saw him a few times after that at some other gaming events. After my ex broke up with me I ended up sleeping with him. I didn't really fancy him, but I could tell he liked me. I thought that would be that, but he wanted to see me again and told me how much he liked me. He treated me so well and it was such a difference to the way I was treated by my ex, I couldn't help but fall for him. He's honestly the nicest guy; everything you could ever want. A little bit shy, a little bit weird and nerdy (I love that about him), and he really loves me. I wouldn't say that it's the only thing I love about him now, but initially the only reason I went for him is because he liked me. Is that a bad thing?", "summary": "I tried to hit it and quit it, but his feelings for me made me in love with him. Is it selfish to love them just because of how they love you?"}
{"id": "t3_4rgo2a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend (21M) doesnt want to come to my(22F) grandma's funeral", "post": "I am on my phone so sorry about the formatting. \n\nMy grandmother was told earlier this year that she had stage four kidney failure, she was expected to last till later on in the year but her health declined very suddenly and she died last sunday. During the time she was sick I asked my boyfriend of just over a year if when she died he would come to the funeral with me, he said he would. I asked him two more times, once on the day she died and once a couple of days ago, and he said he would every time so I asked my parents yesterday if he could come as they were booking a house to stay in over the time of the funeral. \n\nEarlier this morning he messaged me that he doesnt want to go anymore because he feels it will be awkward as he hasnt met most of my family and he doesnt want to sit around for a couple of days (the funeral is being held in her home town five hours away from where we live) with people he barely knows. I feel really upset that he waited till yesterday to tell me he didnt want to go after we had already discussed it a few times, I kinda want him to just tough it out and go regardless but now he has told me he doesnt want to I dont want to drag him to a small town a hours away for the weekend. \n\nAm I justified in being upset with him? Or am I overreacting and should just let him not go?", "summary": "boyfriend said he would go to my grandma's funeral multiple times but thought it through more and decided it would be too awkward and doesnt want to go anymore."}
{"id": "t3_2y8dvy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (25F) was proposed to after sex by my bf (27M), unhappy about effort", "post": "A little background first. We have been dating since school and have been together over 10 years and have discussed marriage for a while now. We also did a lot of mock proposals with plastic rings and random objects for fun. We chose a ring together last month so I was expecting him to ask soon.  \n\nToday, after we had sex and had our clothes back on he shows me the certificate which I eagerly take a look at in the bed. Then he took the box out and showed me the ring. I said \"cool is that it?\", he then goes down on one knee while I'm still laying on the bed and awkwardly asks in a joking manner \"will you marry me\". I said yes stick my hand out and he puts the ring on. After ogling the ring for a bit I was a bit confused and asked if he was serious, which he said he was. Being a bit disappointed I just let it soak for a bit and then suggested he re-do it tomorrow (at a regular place we go) and basically am telling him how to do it, because I don't want to explain our \"real\" proposal to family and friends.  \n\n(P.s. We don't live together)  \n\nInitially I was quite happy, but now I'm at home trying to sleep, but I can't help having negative thoughts. Such as how little effort and thought he placed into it and how easy it would of been to have done more research into it (he does far more research for his hobbies). Am I right to think he hadn't given it much thought cause he knows the answer will be yes? I can't help thinking I deserve better.   \n\nSorry for my ramblings, I just kind of wanted to know if what I'm feeling is right or if I'm just over thinking things. I'm afraid this will taint what's supposed to be a happy memory.", "summary": "BF proposed after sex, I'm disappointed and asked for a re-do. Confront him about how I feel or wait and see?"}
{"id": "t3_23m83p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] met my ex GF [20 F] who I haven't seen in about a year, who I thought I was over..", "post": "I know there is probably alot of similar posts to this, but I'm out of options here.\n\nSo I was home for the easter holidays and went out to town with my friends. Later that night I run into my ex and 2 of her friends and I end up talking with them for a good while.\n\nI really thought I was over her, been feeling that for a while, but when I  stand there I think to myself \"fuck.. I miss you!\". I was basically just standing there looking at her.\n\nWhen I woke up the next morning, I get a message from her saying \"I know you miss me. I could see it last night\". I broke down reading it.\n\nWe dated on and off for about 3 years, but it finally ended around this time last year. I moved away to college after the summer so we haven't talked or seen each other since.\n\nThis was my first relationship where I really loved someone. We didn't have the greatest relationship, she cheated on me and it was a lot back and forth, but for some fucked up reason I still miss her..\n\nI feel like its been ruining my other relationships. I haven't been able to have a proper relationship after her.\n\nAll these memories and feelings are just coming back. \n\nI thought after a year I would finally be over her. I just don't what to do, how to get over her.. \nIts been a year now and honestly its a bit exhausting.\n\nWhat do I do? How do you deal with this?", "summary": "Met my girlfriend while I was home for easter and realized I'm still not over her. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3rzccf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What can I do when spouse drives drunk?", "post": "41F - me. 41F - spouse. Married 21 years\n\nHi. My husband drives drunk. After he does it, we talk about it in the morning and he swears he's so sorry and won't do it again. Then he does. Over and over.\n\nThe incidents are spaced out over a few months usually. The last time was this past Tuesday. Before that it was probably in May. At that time I talked to him about the money just getting a DUI would involve, not to mention if he had an accident or killed someone. It seemed like he really understood finally. He even used uber a few times.\n\nWe've been married over 20 years and have worked hard to get what we have. I don't want to lose everything because of a stupid choice he makes. I feel like when he chooses to drive drunk he's kind of saying, \"Fuck you and fuck our kids and our comfortable life. I don't give a shit if my bad choice ruins everything.\"\n\nI feel like I have no other tools to use. I've already stopped riding with him if he's been drinking, leaving the house if he comes home drunk, etc. I ask him to not drive drunk, but what if he does? How can I protect myself and our children financially if something happens? We live in Florida.\n\nI'm tired and going to go to bed now. \n\nThanks for any insight.", "summary": "Husband drinks and drives. I'm not in physical danger, but what can I do to make sure we don't get financially wiped out if he gets a DUI or worse?"}
{"id": "t3_10ehc9", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Huge (to us) increase in rent -- what is the best course of action? FL, US", "post": "My boyfriend and I live in a managed apartment community, have lived here for about two years. We moved to this city in huge part because of the lower living expenses. When we moved in, we were told to expect increases of at least $25 on lease renewal, and last year the rent increased $27 which was *totally* reasonable. Currently we pay $936/month for a 2/2, which we split about 40/60.\n\nThe other day I got a renewal offer in my email, the lowest priced option was $1051/month, which is an increase of $115 a month and seems unreasonable. I called and spoke to one of the girls in the front office and was told she can regenerate the renewal offer in a week and see if the prices change, but the manager was not around so I couldn't get any more info\n\nWhat's the best course of action here? For background, we are doing okay financially(0 debt, we each have at least a 6 month emergency fund, there's money left over to save each month but not a ton), but we are planning to get married soon and the extra $115 a month is money I had mentally put aside for modest rings and a short honeymoon. Add to that, we will have about $2k in additional expenses in November outside of our regular bills... so the idea of our rent going up after that stresses me out.\n\nMy question is this -- is there anything we can do about this? I've looked up the law where I live and they are within their rights to increase the rent however much they want as long as they give us notice. I have drafted a letter detailing our excellent payment history, how we've never had any problems, mentioning the cost/risk of new tenants, etc., and suggesting that the max increase we will accept is 5%... but I'm not sure that this would have any effect. The girl I spoke to in the office basically said \"the computer does it\" and that she has no say, but I'm thinking the manager might. Does anyone have any experience with this? Are we basically screwed? And also, am I wrong to think this much of an increase is unreasonable?", "summary": "Rent going up by over 12% in a managed apartment community, what's our best course of action to stop this? Is this truly an unreasonable increase, or am I overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_3rzct4", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by telling my friend what a absolute stupid idea his concept of snapchat was and how no one would ever use it, today its valuation is 16 billion dollars", "post": "This happened in early 2011 after the massive spike in popularity of instagram, a popular cell phone app that was sold for 1 billion dollars a while back, but worth much more today.  \n  \nMy best friend from high school wanted to create a social media app since he claimed it was going to be the next big thing and his \"instagram\". He pitched it to me during dinner. His was idea was messaging photos to each other like text messages without relying on sms service and rather through wifi. I immediately, laugh and tell him what a stupid idea that was and that no one was going to use it because people can just share photos through instagram. He continues to tell me how people can send random moments of their day to each other and I continue with stupid rebuttal ideas such that it would be faster to message people by text instead.  \n  \nAnyways fast forward to present day, the only app he has made is some small game and organizer which he did for fun. He realized that it was just a hobby and nothing serious. We joke constantly that he would be a billionaire if I had liked his idea and that he would bring me aboard.", "summary": "Friend had the idea for a concept of snapchat before it was released, I told him it was stupid and we joke about it daily."}
{"id": "t3_2rqz0u", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "False advertising from Samsung and what I can do about it.", "post": "Samsung recently started a promotion to receive a year of free Netflix when you buy one of their qualifying devices. I've been looking into the Galaxy Tab S for a while now, so I finally took the plunge and ordered it from Samsung's official storefront on Amazon. Upon receiving the package, I entered the required info on the promo website and was told that my serial number is not valid. I hopped on the live chat support and spoke with a customer service representative. He informed me that despite ordering the device in the US and having it shipped to my home in the US, from Amazon's US WEBSITE, that I was somehow shipped an international version and therefore do not qualify for the promotion. The thing is, however, I have read through the official terms and conditions from top to bottom and nowhere in there does it say it must be a US device. It DOES say that I must be a legal US resident, which I am; living in Boston, Massachusetts. I have spoken to 4 representatives now who refuse to let me speak to a supervisor. I have been provided a number for Prize Logic, who is running the promotion, but discovered upon calling it that my only option is to leave them a message. Is there any sort of legal action I can take against them for violating the policies which they have set forth?", "summary": "Bought a Samsung tablet to take part in a promotion. Samsung is refusing my claim despite satisfying all of the terms and condition. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_1a98lh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Can/should I [21F] ask out a guy [20ishM] whom I don't really know at all, without coming off as a creep?", "post": "Hi /r/relationships. Throwaway I guess, but this is my first post on reddit, so go easy haha! I essentially need help deciding if I should/how I should hit on a guy. I searched in this sub and on the internets in general, and no such luck. Most 'hitting on' advice isn't directed towards girls.\n\nOkay. So I met this guy (we'll call him L, I forget his name, how sad!) at his place of work about a year ago. I was tagging along with a friend and my friend had to do some paperwork at L's office, with one of his coworkers. So L and I get to chatting, and I find out that we go to the same uni, he seems nice, but I have a boyfriend at the time. We talk for half an hour, I leave and forget about him. Sure enough, we've started passing each other in the hall in the last few weeks. Took me a day or two, but I remembered our conversation. We've made eye contact a few times, maybe he is trying to place me? I would like to ask him out (I would have before if I hadn't been with my ex) but I would feel... creepy? I don't know.\n\nSo reddit, am I crazy? What would you say if you were this guy? Bleh. Thanks in advance for the advice!", "summary": "Shy girl, cute guy, met him a year ago. See him at school, should I ask him out? If yes, how?"}
{"id": "t3_3dmq0e", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Online freelancing scam, can I get paid? [VA]", "post": "I'm not sure if this is the right community for this, so please point me to a better place if one exists.\n\nI got laid off about a month ago and started freelancing via Elance. My second day, I got offered a regular freelancing gig writing 500-word articles at a good pay rate. I took it on, and because I was so new, I didn't know about or use the time tracking tools Elance has built in to guarantee payment. I know, stupid of me, but so it goes. Over two weeks I wrote about 30 articles for him.\n\nSo I turned in my invoice and, surprise, I never got paid. Elance said since I hadn't used their time tracking tools, all they could do was give me contact information. I tried and got nothing -- no surprise, since all they had was an email address and a fake phone number. So that was a dead end.\n\nBut I was able to identify and reach some of the webmasters who had originally commissioned the articles, and one told me he'd bought it from someone on Fiverr. I talked to the Fiverr person and she said she'd outsourced it to a friend (uh huh) and had no idea it was stolen. She refused to tell me who she'd outsourced it to. I suspect she probably resold most, if not all, of my stolen work. Unfortunately, Fiverr doesn't seem to have a way to see what jobs someone has done, so that seems to be another dead end.\n\nI guess my question is, is there any point in reporting to Fiverr? Are there other legal steps I could take? Or do I just need to move on and eat the losses?\n\nI'm in Virginia. The person who hired me claims to be in California but who knows if that's true.", "summary": "Got scammed into doing free work on a freelancing site. Found someone who resold at least some of my stolen work, wondering whether there are legal steps I can take at this point."}
{"id": "t3_4o5645", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Need to fix my relationship", "post": "Sorry for the long post. Every guy/girl feels that their partner is perfect, I'm just trying to hold on to mine.\n\nBasically me and my girl started dating a few months ago and everything was great. Things were low-key in the sense that there was no PDA on social media and we kept the pictures of trips we shared to ourselves. We enjoyed this obscurity but obviously our really close friends knew.\nIt started with our friends randomly tagging us in couple-y/lovey stuff on Facebook but since this wasnt a lot we didn't mind, plus the feeling a lot of people shipping(?) us felt nice. This is where I feel things turned bad. I kinda got carried away by the whole attention and just started posting romantic stuff on her wall or pictures instead of PMing her like before and the attention and \"awww you guys so cute\" kept on piling up.\nUnknowingly, this also cultivated a culture of people identifying us as one person instead of our own individual identities, she'd be addressed as my girlfriend more than her name and it's something neither of us approved.\nLast night she confronted me saying the relationship had become difficult for her and she was having second thoughts, despite loving me. She feels she lost her individuality as a person and we lost our own personal space as a relationship and there were way too many people involved in this and she felt suffocated and backed against a wall.\nI'm glad we talked out everything in detail especially how our conversations lately got so uncomfortable that it was apparent that we were trying too hard.\n\nShe agreed to give me another chance but told me it's all over if things don't change. The obvious thing is to reduce social media presence again and switch back over to personal messaging and calls. But what else can I do? Also her being on another continent over the summer with like a 6 hour time difference doesn't help.", "summary": "we love each other but we went from a really private relationship to a really public one. Gf feels suffocated ."}
{"id": "t3_25anun", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Last night I[25 M] almost cheated on my gf [24 F] of 2.5 years, I guess.", "post": "And I'm just feeling meh. So many mixed emotions.\n\nI've been dating a lovely girl for about 2.5 years. She is quite attractive, much smarter than I am, and oh so sweet. Unfortunately, we're long distance, and we'll remain long distance for at least another year.\n\nLast night, a girl I know basically propositioned me for sex. I came THIS close to telling her yes, come over, please. This girl is local, lives right up the street from me. She's the type of girl I've always been strongly attracted to (the manic pixie dream girl type, I suppose) but have never actually dated. Ultimately, I did NOT invite her up. But afterwards, I tossed and turned in bed all night.\n\nI feel guilty, for even considering cheating; I feel regret at missing out on what probably would've been a really fun night -- coupled with a sort of deeper melancholy I feel when I consider all the girls I'll *never* know; I feel relief, at not having cheated; I feel sad about what this surely must say about the state of my relationship; and honestly, I don't know which of these emotions I'm feeling most strongly. (To tell you the truth, things *have* been tough lately. Long distance is hard, to begin with, and my significant other is leaving the country for a few months and we'll have even LESS contact; she has been clinically depressed for a while now, and doesn't seem to be getting better, and it's getting harder to deal with; and realistically, we'll probably be long distance for another 1.5 years, best case scenario).\n\nThanks for reading. I'm not sure that I really have a question -- I mainly just wanted to get this off my chest. Your thoughts are certainly welcome, though.", "summary": "in a long distance relationship that's been getting tougher; attractive local girl I know propositions me for sex, I almost accept but ultimately do not; have been feeling lots of feelings."}
{"id": "t3_1u7yws", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/f] I have been in an verbally abusive relationship for almost 10mo now [29/m]. I mistakenly signed a 6mo lease with him and now want to move out.", "post": "I had met my boyfriend while visiting a friend in San Francisco we clicked and began and ldr. Eventually I leave my town to live with him, with out having any friends in the city. As soon as I moved in sooo many red flags popped up, found out he had lied about his age, he would just flip shit over little things, constantly needed to know where I was, constantly called me stupid and a bitch. Now I realized I had made a mistake but I had enrolled in a semester and just began working and so I was stuck (manipulation was also a factor in me not getting the fuck out). A few months down the line thing actually start getting better, living together is working out until his landlord demands I leave by the end of November. Not knowing anyone in the city made finding a place very hard and expensive and he wanted to get a place together so I complied. Of course the abuse came back full force as soon as we moved. So here I am now, cash drained from the move (5k savings gone), completely alone, depressed and being constantly attacked for being myself. Now I am a strong person it takes a lot to break me but I want to get away from him asap. Also I would like to mention since I moved to sf minus the abuse part my life has never been better I went from making <$800 a year to making 60k a year with no college degree and job experience. So there no way in hell I'm letting that go.", "summary": "moved to a different city with verbally abusive bf, now wants to leave but just signed a 6mo lease and is broke af"}
{"id": "t3_130lgl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (21 F) win back my boyfriend (22 M)?", "post": "My boyfriend of almost a year recently broke up with me because he felt like I don't trust him. I've been cheated on in the past and the result was me being very protective of my feelings. I do trust him 100% and I'm usually able to remind myself of that but we've had a couple drunk fights where I couldn't and got mad at him for no reason. I don't know what to do but I love him and I just want to be with him. I just need some advice of what I could say to him so he might consider getting back together or making this a break instead of being completely done.", "summary": "My boyfriend (22 M) of a year broke up with me (21 F) because he felt like I didn't trust him."}
{"id": "t3_2m7z18", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by almost crashing my dad's car", "post": "Ok so this happened a few days ago but then again most posts here rant from today.\n\nSo I Am a learner driver who learning on a manual car, now as you can imagine, I hate hill starts to the point where I'll do anything to avoid them.  Now to the fuck up, I was coming a particular hill which in my eyes was almost vertcle, I was about 30 meters from the light when it turned orange, so naturally I started to panic and speed up. There just so happened to be one of those dick head drivers who was turning at this hill and has already stopped HALF IN HIS LANE AND HALF IN MINE!! So there I was foot down on the accelarator comming up to this guy, my dad told me to stop three times before he watched me swerve away from the other driver and about to run the now red light. This is where I wish it ended but no, because the light went red other cars could go, this is where my dad got really mad! Not only did I swerve one way to get away from the dick driver but I also swerved the opposite way from another car.  \n\nMy da was absolutely furious with me. Made me Pull the car over and swap drivers, he then proceeded to shout at me the rest of the way home. I honestly thought he was going to throw me out of the window", "summary": "I swerved out of the way of two cars almost hitting both of them just so I wouldn't stop at a hill"}
{"id": "t3_1ojulv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My 18/F girlfriend broke up with me 17/M last night out of the blue destroying me completely.", "post": "My girlfriend of 2 months broke up with me last night after I got back home from her place. She said she knew I wasn't the guy she was looking for, and that we probably won't last. Although she said still loved me and wants to stay friends. This completely devastated me. I loved this girl a lot and even though we didn't date for too long. I felt like she was the one. We had so much in common and I loved all the things about her we didn't have in common. And I know this sounds cliche but she was one of a kind. I don't want to lose her, but I told her that I didn't want to stay friends because it would hurt too much to be around her anymore if we aren't dating, but she's very stubborn and won't admit anything I say to be right. \n\nI told her i'd stop by on Thursday to drop off the things she gave me (stories, pictures, etc..) I also am going to give her what was supposed to be her Christmas present. She is trying to convince me to stay on Thursday, but I don't know how I feel about that. I want her back, but I don't at the same time because what if I get her back but I'm unable to meet her standards? What should I do on Thursday guys?", "summary": "My girlfriend broke up with me and I'm pretty sure she's the one, so I'm going to see her on Thursday and I want to know what I should do."}
{"id": "t3_28nlop", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30M] with Humanity, Mental health issue conundrum and attractiveness.", "post": "Recently I have had a falling out with a girl who means alot to me and I dont know whether I want a romantic or a friendship relationship with her. She wants none of the romantic part of it though.\n\nWhen it comes to finding a suitable romantic partner, why is it that when ever I bring up the fact I have tourette, OCD, and AD(H)D to them. It immediately sends up a signal in their head at a subconscious level \"Danger, danger will robinson. Abort, abort\"?\n\nWhen I speak here, I speak for ALL Tourette, AD(H)D, and OCD sufferers with [similar situations and across all gender-boundaries[emended addition thanks to /u/glitter_cunt ]].  Not just myself.\n\nIs it really true that evolutionary traits and the ability for a woman to \"sniff\" out flawed DNA[RNA] kicks in and only looks for males that are socially normal, physiologically sound, and mentally unflawed in anyway? This seems to be a resounding pattern over my last 7 encounters with female-persons. If I am on a 0:7 failure rate. Something is wrong here at a biological/evolutionary level. And I am about to throw up the white flag and deem myself unworthy of any woman out there and live my life alone.\n\nAre there any sane and non-evolutionary-seeking female-persons out there that even realize that I and many other sufferers of Tourette, OCD, and AD(H)D deserve the same treatment as my non-mentally ill male counterparts? I hate living in a forced exile state in this society and world. If the evolutionarily-sound men can live happy productive lives and start families, be a father, and be a care giver. Why the hell cant I be privy to that type of embrace? Im 30 y/o and find myself getting alot of non-preferential treatment out there.", "summary": "I am frustrated at the world not being able to see my side of things and seemingly reject me due to my mental illness when it comes to relationships."}
{"id": "t3_glc3c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My brother won't be allowed to continue his cancer follow-up treatments because he was dropped from my family's insurance.", "post": "I'm a lurker here. I know I don't have the karma to back this up, but I am really real, and I've seen what the hive-mind can do, so I'm going out on a limb and asking for advice on medical and legal fronts here. \n\nI recently moved to the East Coast from Utah. A couple months ago, I was shocked to hear my mother call and tell me that my 27 year old brother (living in Utah) had been diagnosed with cancer. Luckily, he received primary treatments, and his cancer is in remission. \n\nHowever, he was medically advised to get post-chemo treatment to make sure that the cancer hasn't spread (it was a particularly aggressive type). These were supposed to last for 5 years, twice a month for one year, once a month for the next year, and once every couple months for years 3-5. He had surgery to remove the tumors 3 months ago. \n\nHe had been insured under the policy my dad got through his job, but my dad's company tanked recently and my parents lost almost everything they had (including our family home). My brother told me today that he missed one insurance payment last month, and now the insurance company has dropped him as a client. \n\nThis means that he is facing the next 5 years without any medical help. No doctors, no medication, nothing.\n\nThere has to be something I can do, but I'm just kind of shocked. My family are hard-working people, and my brother is a full-time college student as well as a nearly full-time worker. He has looked in to the pitiful excuse for public health options they have at home, but no luck. He *is* a member of the LDS church (I'm not), so if anyone knows of any outreach to the LDS community, or any church-based help for people in such situations, those might be good options. Other than that, I'm just really looking for advice. What should I/my family/my brother do?\n\nThank you very, very much in advance.", "summary": "My brother's cancer treatments were supposed to last for 5 years, but 3 months in he lost his insurance. Looking for any advice about medical services in Utah area that might apply."}
{"id": "t3_330odd", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[18/m]How do I get over someone[18/f] who I still love and who I still have to see almost everyday for the next 2 months?", "post": "So, I really liked this girl(we are both 18) for a year now (we are classmates, now in our senior year), and last month she told me she had feelings for me too.\n\nWe started dating, going out and kissing and all seemed great untill we went to a bar with some friends and she started making out with some random dude she found there, and she spent whole night with him.\n\nI tried to end whatever we had together, but she told me next day that she was really sorry and that she was drunk, so I forgave her.\n\nFast forward till this week, i know she is still constantly talking with that guy, and even seeing him (I'm not supposed to know this). Even more, she started spending more time with her ex, who is still in her group of friends.\n\nI know that my chances are probably gone, and I'm trying to get over her, but the thing is we still have 2 months of classes together and I can't just ignore her, she's a very sensitive person and she always complained to me that she doesn't have close friends around her.\n\nAlso, I have an extremely important exam to take in 2 months, and I just can't focus on studying because I always think about her and what she is doing, I even check her FB and her friends' FB every hour or so.", "summary": "So, the tricky question is, how do I get over her without completely breaking her and without looking like an asshole?"}
{"id": "t3_icxj6", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Is it all over?", "post": "So basically we're both 19 and have both been going pretty hard out at playing the game for the past two months. We have gone out a couple of times and we can go for weeks texting each other novel length messages and not get sick of it.\n\nI thought I had it pretty sweet for a while, our friends refer to us as being bf and gf, but we have never admitted it ourselves, or would reply with 'she/he wishes', pretty much just both trying to not show too much interest in the other. \n\nI should also add that we have both never been in relationships, and he has a history of never really pursuing girls but is most definitely not gay (before you go there haha)\n\nRecently I lost my virginity to him, which isn't something that I regret at all, but this is where things started getting fucked. Around the second time we did it my mother found out (most awkwarddd) but ended up being alright with it, and I told him of this. He started just being awkward and kind of stand-offish, and said 'its so awkward that she knows everything...' and fearing that my parents will slaughter him, but at the same time would say things like 'i want to meet your mum so she can know that she has nothing to worry about' blah.\n\nI've initiated texting since, which is something i would ordinarily rarely do, but his replies have been pretty shit. I'm taking a step back and have ceased contact, thinking maybe he needs space. Based on what i've experienced and everything i've heard about him, he's not the 'love em and leave em' type of guy, but he's being pretty asshole-y right now.\n\nWas I right in doing this? Will he even come back to me? WHAT IS HAPPENING?!?!", "summary": "Smooth sailing up until we had sex and my mom found out, now he's being crazy awkward and I don't know if he's just not interested anymore or if he is being awkward because of the mother thing."}
{"id": "t3_1fyhhz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(NSFW?) How do I [19F] talk to my super vanilla bf [20M] about switching things up in the bedroom?", "post": "Apologies if this belongs in /r/sex - I wasn't sure.\n\nWe've been together ~5 months and have great communication about everything but our sex life, which hasn't been going amazingly. I took his virginity, but he's not the first guy I've been with.\n\n I'm into some basic kinky stuff, nothing too \"out there\", I would just enjoy some light bondage, spanking, dirty talk, etc. A week or so ago I brought up the topic of kinks and encouraged him to talk about specific fantasies he has...all he came up with was telling me his favorite position thus far (missionary, incidentally) and that he really is not into the whole dominance/submission power play thing, which was a little disappointing. Now I feel awkward talking about stuff I want to try because I really doubt he'd be into it...how can I bring this up?", "summary": "Boyfriend is apparently kink free, I'm not. How can I discuss my desires with him without freaking him out?"}
{"id": "t3_1kiotq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "LDR based mostly on texting, is this normal?", "post": "My(25M) gf(F25) and I have a fairly new relationship, and unfortunately it has been a long distance thing from the beginning. Even though our distance is only about 90 miles, we still only get to see each other on weekends, maybe every other if we have some other plans. We mostly text all the time when we aren't together. We have had phone conversations that I have initiated, but it seems like she prefers to only text.\n\n \nI don't mind it, but some things can be taken the wrong way though texting(sarcasm as he biggest one) and it's much less personal as many of you know.\n\nSo the question is do most people who aren't around their SO's mostly text all the time or should I try to push phone conversations more often? She's also fairly introverted, which I think plays a large role in this as well. Thanks for your thoughts in advance..", "summary": "Dating a girl for about 5 weeks long distance, we mostly only talk through texting when not around each other. Standard for most relationships?"}
{"id": "t3_2844jz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21m) finally ended things with semi abusive gf (19f). Just looking for perspective on things...", "post": "Dated for 1.5 years and always loved this girl. However, she has a narcissistic mother who has emotionally abused her since birth. Because of this she has a serious anger problem. When she gets really really mad she'll say anything she can to hurt me. After ups and downs and things getting better and worse, eventually we had an incident where she physically assaulted me. I drew the line there and ended things. After a few days of no contact she called me crying and in tears, extremely apologetic and now rational (surprise surprise...). I explained I didn't hate her but that we couldn't be together. We could always be friends. Then she dropped a bomb on me.\n\nShe explained that the night prior one of my good friends, both very drunk, was at a party with her and followed her home and asked to spend the night. He ended up forcinr himself on her, but she gave in and had sex with him. She then told him to stop and forced him to go home. She apologized to me over and over again but I can't take her back. Especially after what happened that night. \n\nIt's quite obvious how much this girl loves me and how much I love her. But I can't just pretend she didn't do all those things to me. \n\nI really don't know how to handle the friend situation, I feel very betrayed.", "summary": "gf is abusive, finally ended it. Then she gets borderline raped by a close friend of mine and begs for me back. I tell her no but really miss her and don't know how to handle the friend situation."}
{"id": "t3_1n0gut", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 F] am concerned that my finance [24 M] might have a drinking problem.", "post": "I dated my finance for a year before he left for the military. Never had any alcohol problems. Since then we have flown to see each other about 5 times.  We will have a drink or two during the time we spend together but it is never excessive.  \n\nThe fourth time and the last time that I saw him, he got blackout drunk and was very aggressive and controlling.  \n\nThe first incident was at Las Vegas. Being Vegas, I thought maybe it was just the city so I didn't say anything.  The second time was for a Buddy's deployment party.  It was all guys getting drunk so I tried to leave.  And he was extremely controlling. He pushed me and then tried to make me feel guilty by crying and then when that didn't work he started being condescending.  My mom finally came to pick me up.\n\nThe next day he said he didn't remember any of this and promised to never get this drunk again.  Its been about 6 months now since this happened but my mom doesn't let me hear the end of it.\n\nShould I be concerned?", "summary": "The last two times that I saw my military fiance during our vacation, he got blackout drunk and was very aggressive and controlling. Should I be concerned?"}
{"id": "t3_3dqu1a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "me: 31/F, bf: 27/M, together for almost 2yrs... How often do you text your SO while he or she is out with their friends? Whether it's a night out or some kind of vacation/weekend getaway...", "post": "Usually when my bf goes out locally, whether it's drinks after work with colleagues or a night out with the guys, I refrain from blowing up his phone. I think I text about 3 to 4 times that night, just to see how he's doing, if he's having fun, and to wish him a good night (if he's going to be out all night and I'm going to bed). We don't live together and usually see each other on the weekends. He hates texting and so do I, so we don't  text each other on the regular anyways. \n\nHowever, when he leaves the country for work I text him way more. \n\nI'm curious to know how often you guys text your SO when they are out with their friends partying and getting hammered. Does it vary if they are local or out of the country/state?", "summary": "want to know if you guys text SO while they go out w/out you, if so, how often & does it matter if they are in/out the country/state"}
{"id": "t3_1ly8x3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[17M] with my gf [17F] of 5 months, broke up and need to deal with seeing her everday.", "post": "This was my first real relationship, and it met its demise due to my trust issues and her feelings changing based on my lack of trust.\n\nI decided to break things off a week ago after fighting for 8 days non-stop, but due to changes in my plans for my education I am now back in school. (I'm repeating my Leaving Cert year in order to get better grades & points to go to a better college and a better course.)\n\nMy now ex-gf is in this same year so I have to see her everday, she is avoidable for most of the day but we do have classes together. Although I broke it off I still have strong feelings for her and seeing her is incredibly distracting from my studies. What do I do? How do I get over it as soon as possible?", "summary": "Broke up with gf, still have feelings for her, have to see her everday which is distracting me from study."}
{"id": "t3_256aaz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16F] with my Boyfriend [18 M] 6 months, Going away to college. How will it work and what to expect?", "post": "I know I am 16, but I am not ignorant to the fact that most high school relationships do not end in marriage. I am honestly not looking into that at the moment anyway and for a very long time, have not even considered it to be in my future. Regardless, i found myself dating this wonderful guy and I have grown very very fond of him. I am confident in saying that i love him and i know he loves me too. He is a reserved man and relationships have been hard for him in the past, not because he has commitment issues or anything, he could just not connect with the girls he was seeing. \n\nAnywho, we are now together in a healthy relationship and he is going to college in the same city i will be in highschool. I am a junior and plan on applying to a university in the same city. mostly because it is a prestigious university but the fact that he will be nearby is very nice as well.  If i get accepted, i would definitely attend for financial reasons even if it isn't necessarily my first choice. \n\nWe have talked over things vaguely and he says he would really like to stay with me in college. I completely understand if his mind changes and have took tiny steps in preparing myself to let him go should he choose to break up after summer. For now, i guess i'll just go with the time we have together. it's not like he is moving incredibly far anyway.\n\n So reddit, what advice could you give me for the months to come? How have your highschool/ college relationships worked out? please share!", "summary": "Boyfriend is going to college in the same city as me/What should I expect and how did your experiences turn out?"}
{"id": "t3_392a6f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24M] having trouble saying no to my [21M] controlling ex of 1.5 yrs", "post": "Our relationship got off to a hasty start. We moved in together in about a week of meeting each other. We became infatuated quickly and developed a rather codependent relationship. After a week or two he told me about his recreational substance use. I am pretty open minded when it comes to most chemicals. He has been using pain killers since he was a teenager. I don't like supporting that since it influences his mood swings even more and it can be addictive.\n\nWhen we moved in together, we moved to my mom's. They didn't always get along. They both have similar mental health issues (bipolar depression) so sometimes I have a hard time distinguishing their true feelings between their manic phases. My ex seems to think we can work things out. I tried to leave twice prior to this, but agreed to give it another shot at a new apartment.\n\nI couldn't put up with him so I moved back in with my mom (alone). But they kind of despise each other so I can feel them trying to pit me against the other at times. He still has my cat which I had prior to our relationship. He won't give it back since my mom's house has bugs. I also work in hospitality so customer service is a must for me. It is hard to be fun and happy with customers when I have been walking on eggshells for so long.\n\nIt has been about 3 weeks since we split. I still get invited to visit. I still do visit. About a week ago I got a little too drunk and stayed at his apartment. I may have said and done things that led him on. I want to let him off easy but we want to stay friends. I think he wants more than that. He has already been flirting/sending nudes to guys on social apps. He says that doesn't mean anything but I feel otherwise. He doesn't believe me when I say we need a bit of a grieving period to get over each other. Its hard for me to be brutally honest sometimes. Please help me stick to this decision!", "summary": "How do I gracefully end a codependent relationship without losing my cat/job performance? Is friendship off the table for now?"}
{"id": "t3_yaojk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Americans of reddit, what's your stance on gun control, and why?", "post": "I'm a staunch supporter of the 2nd Amendment. I believe citizens have both the constitutional and the natural right to bear any small arms they choose - including assault rifles, machine guns, and even should-fired missiles. I support thorough background checks on weapons purchases, as well as state-issued firearm licenses. However, I don't think people should have to pay special fees or taxes on specified weapons types (for example, the current NFA tax on short-barreled rifles). In short, I advocate firearms being freely available with minimal government regulation.\n\nThe common arguments against gun control involve hunting, recreational shooting, and home defense. I whole-heartedly support those things, but I think focusing on them too much ignores the primary reason for an armed civilian population: PROTECTION FROM TYRANNICAL GOVERNMENT.\n\nWhen writing the 2nd Amendment, the Founding Fathers specifically had armed militias in mind. Such militias played a pivotal role against the British during the American Revolution, and it was assumed that they could play a role in keeping any future government in check.\n\nToday, the media regularly tells us about police brutality and CIA torture. It is now \"legal\" for the federal government to spy on, kidnap, indefinitely detain, and assassinate anyone (including American citizens) it deems a \"threat\" to itself. I don't care what Congress or the Supreme Court says- these things are wrong, and they threaten the freedom of the American people! \n\nIn order to maintain a free, safe, democratic nation, PEOPLE SHOULD NOT FEAR THEIR GOVERNMENT! THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD FEAR THEM!", "summary": "I advocate an armed civilian population as protection against tyrannical government. I'm against any further gun control measures, and believe that the system in fact needs to deregulated."}
{"id": "t3_kpb4r", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Anxious about traveling alone - any tips?", "post": "I'm an American living in Germany, working as an au pair for a relative. I like to travel, and I want to take advantage of the opportunity to explore Europe... but I've never traveled all alone before and it's freaking me out. I was going to take a nice little day trip to Cologne today, but when I got to the train station I just felt so overwhelmed by everything, nauseous with anxiety and like I was going to lose my self-control and start crying if I tried to ask anyone for help.\n\nBy the time I calmed myself down, I didn't even want to go anymore, I just wanted to come home and sleep. I'm homesick and lonely, and if I can't manage a little day trip how can I get myself to Paris or London? I was so excited to come here, but I've practically lost interest in traveling. I'm disappointed and I feel like I can't rely on myself. What can I do to get over this?", "summary": "I want to travel in Europe while I have the chance, but I'm so anxious about it I can't even leave the city I'm staying in. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_1k0lks", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What memory stands out when you think of your parents (or parental figures, for those of you who had to go without)?", "post": "It was my 17th birthday. I was pretty heavy into drumming, and I had been playing for more than a year on a cheap Pearl kit with the same stock cheap-o cymbal it came with. My birthday comes around, and right after my Mom and Brother finish singing happy birthday and passing me a donut (not a big fan of cake), my Dad asks me to follow him into the garage.\n\nI follow him in there, and he reaches up behind the refrigerator and pulls out a bag with a scratched up crash and a dinged ride cymbal. He hands it to me, and says, \"Happy Birthday, son. The drum guy said these are good ones, but they're a little banged up. I'm sorry they're not new.\"\n\nI was just blown away; my childhood hero is scraping cash together to get me a present (that I absolutely loved, by the way), and he's apologizing?! At that moment, I knew that whatever hardship that my Dad and I experienced before and whatever we'd experience in the future was just because he loved me so very much.\n\nJust thinking about it now causes me to choke up. Ever since then I've done my best to live up to his example.", "summary": "It's my birthday, my Dad scrapes cash together to buy me used cymbals and apologizes unnecessarily, and as a result, I have a grand realization."}
{"id": "t3_40iwst", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by watching YTP", "post": "So, around 2012, we just moved into a new house. We had absolutely no internet at that time, but my mom was a saint, she had the magical power of her cell phone, which had internet! Every Monday night, she would let us use her phone to look up random shit. I had tons of awesome memories with her phone, like the reveal of the new Mario Kart and Super Mario game coming next year. It was great...\n\nBut, onto the real story. It was another Monday night, my mom gave us both the phone with unhindered internet access. Now, I watch YouTube videos all the time, it was how I found news about the latest in tech and stuff! As I was searching through the vids, going from link to link, I found this strange video. It's name? \"YTP: Spongebob starts a Farting Contest in class\". What is this beast that lives on my screen? I found out quickly. It was vulgar, it was poorly edited, but most of all, it was hilarious. I tapped on the Youtuber's icon, and I looked at all of his YTPs, which were also hilarious.\n\nI do this until around 11 P.M., and my Mom bursts into the room to tell be something while I was watching a YTP. I quickly turn the phone off and nervously asked if it was time for bed, but before Mom answered, she grabbed the phone out of my hands and watched the entire fucking YTP. She gets pissed, and sends me to bed. You might think I just got yelled at, but NO. What my mom was going to tell me was that I could go out into the living room and have a midnight snack of a cupcake. A CUPCAKE. Let's just say, my pillow was drenched in tears when I finally fell asleep. I'm now 16 years old, and I've found ways to watch YTP in secrecy now.", "summary": "I watch a vulgar edit of a Spongebob episode and miss the perfect chance to have the best night of my life."}
{"id": "t3_yf5i8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Question regarding learning/teaching.", "post": "I apologize in advance if this is not the right sub reddit for this kind of question.\n\nfor the past 2 years, i've been slowly but surely developing my illustration skills. I am 18, recently out of high school, and will be going to college for a bachelors in illustration in likely 1-2 years. \n\nDespite teaching my self to be better, by using resources from the internet/library ext, but improvement has been slow. It can be seen, but I still feel i am behind where i should be at my age, and for how long i have been drawing/painting.\n\nI've met many artists who are self taught, and never went to college at all for what they do, yet i have it in my mind that college will help me greatly, since i learn faster when taught by another, rather then myself.\n\nMy question is, is this actually possible? do some people just have a harder time of teaching theirself? I have the dedication and interest to pursue education, but i respond so much better to being instructed, rather than instructing myself. Is this normal?", "summary": "Do some people just learn better when being taught, rather than teaching themselves? Is it normal to not be able to learn as effectively by yourself?"}
{"id": "t3_2m48y3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21f]with my boyfriend [23m] for 8 months. How much change is normal??", "post": "So a little back story. I met my boyfriend about 9 and a half months ago. We started hanging out and sleeping together pretty frequently and within a month we were exclusive. Things moved pretty fast after that. We've moved in together, bought furniture and televisions and a car together. \n\nHe has had issues with anxiety and depression. He also has a condition that causes physical pain in his legs, ankles and feet.\n\nWe've only had a few issues during our relationship. There's been no cheating, no lying that I know of, nothing to have caused things to go wrong. However it still feels like things are going wrong.\n\nUntil about a month ago we were having sex every day. We experimented and tried new things. He performed oral sex on me at least twice a week. It was great. So when the sex started getting less frequent, I talked to him about it. At first he told me I was crazy and I was imagining it so I gave it time. After a week or so though nothing changed. I talked to him about it again and this time he blamed it on his depression, poor self image and his leg pain. I now get sex once a week if I'm lucky and if we have sex, I'm always on top.\n\nSo on top of not having sex, we don't do anything except sit around, watch Netflix and maybe get high. We never go on dates or take walks or cook together and we rarely talk unless we're outside smoking a cigarette. \n\nOn top of that he is constantly getting annoyed with things I do. Even things that he used to find endearing. He makes me feel like I'm an idiot. \n\nSo basically I'm wondering if this kind of change in a relationship is normal. I've only been with 2 guys exclusively before this one and they were both cheaters and liars and had no respect for me so I'm afraid my idea of normal is not in fact normal. Should I expect better or is this the best I'll get?", "summary": "I know that relationships change but I don't know if this much change is normal. Things moved very fast between us and I'm concerned that it affected the way out relationship developed."}
{"id": "t3_3y1wrh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] can't trust my SO [20M] of 6 months, but I really want to.", "post": "Okay so I've been with my boyfriend for six months, and I really do love him, and I really want to trust him and spend the rest of my life with him. \n\nThe problem is that I am very insecure, and he hasn't helped much with that. He showers me with compliments all the time, but then he'll start talking to other girls, and get pictures of them and stuff. He swears that he doesn't ask for anything like that and it just happens, but I find that hard to believe.\n\nAlso, his best friend is really rude to me, and always encouraging my boyfriend to look at other girls. I have finally declared that I want nothing to do with his friend, but my boyfriend doesn't really care. Even though his friend is an asshole in general, not just to me, my boyfriend still hangs out with him instead of spending time with me. I have a busy schedule and can really only see him on the weekends, and even though he sees his friend every single weekday, he still sometimes doesn't reserve the weekends for me.\n\nAll I want to do is trust him.  It's just that I'm not always around to be making sure that he's not talking inappropriately to some girl again. He tells me that he wouldn't ever do anything like that again and that I can check his phone when I bring it up, but I figure even if he was talking to someone he would just delete the evidence. \n\nIt just seems like as soon as I start to trust him again I find our about another girl or he says something really hurtful or offensive and then we are back to square one.", "summary": "my boyfriend is nice to me, but has proven to be untrustworthy before. He swears that he has changed though."}
{"id": "t3_v9za5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Customer service runaround about a simple UI fix. Anyone want to help me demonstrate the utter laziness of their engineers and customer support?", "post": "Basically, my company pays $1000's of dollars every year to CapitalIQ for access to their financial database. I use it all the time (have to for my job) and have recently gotten frustrated because their customer service is saying they can't fix a simple bug in their web page.\n\nSee here: \n\nProblem I have is that CapitalIQ's website puts a huge notification (advertisements of other services) banner on the home screen that takes up over 20% of the vertical space. You can close the banner, but then if you refresh the page, the banner comes right back. \n\nSo basically, my company is already paying them a ton of money to use their software, and they are forcing me to see advertisements of other stuff they want to sell me. And I have to see those ads over and over and over again, every day, multiple times a day in fact (every page refresh).\n\nI've asked them to make each *new* banner go away forever once I close it. And **their response was effectively for me to go fuck myself for asking, it's too complicated, but they have logged my complaint and their engineers *might look at it in September*, but in the meanwhile, again I should continue to go fuck myself for asking.**\n\nI don't know much java script, but it seems like this should be like 2 lines of code to fix. I would really like to send them what the code looks like just to show them how utterly (a) lazy their engineers are and (b) lame and lazy their customer service support is.\n\nI was hoping a couple people on Reddit might be crack programmers or SW engineers who know enough about java and UIs to help me out.\n\nThanks-\nNazdaq", "summary": "SW company is giving me the runaround about a simple fix in their UI and I'm looking for a crack programmer to suggest what the code would look like to fix the bug. See"}
{"id": "t3_tokai", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I tell my boyfriend that his friends are a bad influence on him?", "post": "Background:\nI'm 21(F) and he's 25. He moved in with his old college room mates about a year ago, and they're a terrible influence on him. Before he moved in there, he used to go to the gym regularly, eat well, and go to church. Since he's moved in with them, he's gained about 30 lbs. To be fair, I've gained weight as well since we started dating, but it's mostly because I started at a University with a meal plan, and later on I could only afford cheap, less-healthy food. I've been trying to work with him constantly for both of us to go to the gym more, eat better, and go to church together.  He ends up going out to eat way more than he should (his friends all have good paying jobs and don't really care about their health, while he's still looking for a job in his field of study), and is just generally negatively affected by the environment. I like the person he is when we're alone a lot better than him around his guy friends. It seems like he just makes a lot of poor choices around this group. I don't know how to go about telling him this...I know guys can be sensitive when it comes to their friends, though he already knows I don't like his friends. They give me a hard time a lot and tend to make me feel like crap- they've actually reduced me to tears a few times. On that note- they're about 70/30 as far as being jerks goes. Maybe 1/3 of the time they're actually decent to me, but I mostly end up feeling belittled and uncomfortable- it's a lot like High School. I've talked to him about this multiple times, and he says that A) I need to stand up for myself, and B) I need to let him know when I get upset, because he genuinely doesn't know what's making me upset, or what they say that sets me off. So, suggestions for how to bring this up with him?", "summary": "My boyfriend's friends are a bad influence on him, and I don't quite know how to convey that to him properly."}
{"id": "t3_2tjvfb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] and my GF [23F] of 2 years have fallen into the same sexual routine. I don't feel satisfied as much and want things to change, but she doesn't know this and I'm afraid to speak up.", "post": "So me and my girlfriend have been together for 2 years. We don't live together or see each other as often as we'd like (distance) but we are very committed. At first we were exploring and experimenting sexually, but it soon faded away and we are now very set in our ways.\n\nIt was going to be a wall of text so I've narrowed it down to this. These are my problems:\n\n* We only do one position now, which is her favourite.\n* I want to experiment with more positions and other things.\n* I asked her what she likes during sex, she seems to have no specific turn-ons or anything she'd like to try. She's happy the way things are.\n* I however do have some things, nothing crazy. (Braided hair, a fave position, her wearing boots)\n* I'm afraid to own up and be open about these things, because she is easily offended. (Once got upset that I said I preferred a different position)\n* She is quite prudish, and may think even these simple things are weird.\n* I don't know how to be open with her. On one hand I'm worried she'll get angry that I haven't opened up earlier or will think I'm unsatisfied (sort of true), and will flip out.\n* On the other hand, if I don't say anything nothing will change and will get worse for me, but she is already happy.\n* I am perfectly happy to do things that will please her too. I don't want to be selfish about it.\n\nI just want us to be open with each other and try new things,  *without* her getting angry about it. What can a guy do?", "summary": "Beginning to feel unsatisfied with sex life with GF of 2 years, although she is perfectly happy. I want to try new things, but worried about telling her as she is quite prudish and will likely be upset."}
{"id": "t3_2fdhdi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with constant traveling job. Anxious about my romantic future.", "post": "Thanks for taking the time to read this.\n\nBackground: I was really never much of a ladies man in highschool/college. Quiet introverted with not much interest in \"playing the game.\" In the past year however, I turned that around. I have been much more successful engaging women, getting their number, going on dates etc... This isn't so much a problem any longer, meeting them is still difficult however. \n\n I am a 25year old dude that travels a lot with work. I'm an engineer with a very cool and good paying job and all that jazz. I chose to travel because sitting on a computer designing for 8 hours a day would probably drive me nuts, not to mention I enjoy what  I do. I tried it for a little but I found it monotonous and un-challenging. Eventually...2-5 years down the line I feel like I will retire to a desk job just because that's where my promotion progression will lead me. \n\nI work on a rotation so I basically work 19 days straight then get 9 days off. It's hard to meet a women, keep them interested long enough and have them wait around for me. If I meet a chick while working, then it turns into a long distance relationship, which hasn't worked out either.\n\nIn the past months where relationships have fallen apart because of my work I have become increasingly anxious of my romantic future. I'd like to be settled down by 30, with having known my potential partner for many years hopefully. For me this timetable might work but I can't get my anxieties of dying alone out of my head. I'm wondering if I should settle for a desk job or follow work that I enjoy doing.\n\nCan anyone else relate? How did you handle these thoughts?", "summary": "I travel a lot, hard to meet keep women interested in me past a couple months. Anxious I will die alone."}
{"id": "t3_sz5yz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have you ever wanted to say a compliment to someone another color but it came out really wrong?", "post": "So the other day we were playing volleyball at my school and since there's people who can't play we're allowed to catch the ball. So I jump and push the ball where no one can reach it, but there's this black guy who dolphin dive and catch it (most amazing volleyball catch I ever saw) Me wanting to make a funny joke, told him he should get back in the NBA ( I actually wanted to say NFL because of that catch) but since I heard that joke about every black people being good at basketball, so many times, the word NBA just came automatically. Now he thinks I'm racist (Which I'm really not) Long story short, What's your worst racial comment/joke?", "summary": "Made NBA joke to a black guy when I wanted to say a compliment about an amazing catch at volleyball and now he think I'm racist."}
{"id": "t3_1c0y5m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I think I may have a sleeping disorder, reddit please help me find an answer.", "post": "Whenever I do activities that don't involve much focus, I get extremely tired and have an almost uncontrollable urge to close my eyes and fall asleep. This happens when in church, in class and even when driving (only in low activity areas like driving between towns). \n\nI love going to church and listening to sermons but am unable to stay awake. I love to drive but again fall asleep. My classes are understandable because most of them are boring but I still have an almost uncontrollable urge to fall asleep. I am only tired when I do these things and as soon as I stop and do something that involves more focus or brain activity I am wide awake and couldn't fall asleep if I wanted too.\n\n I am a 21 year old white male, who sleeps for 8 hours every night. I have a sleep number bed that is only a couple months old. This has been happening since I was around 17. Is their anything that I can do? An actual diagnosis for this?", "summary": "Uncontrollable urge to fall asleep when doing activities that don't involve much brain work or focus. What can I do to fix this?"}
{"id": "t3_3toaal", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[17/F] boyfriend [16 M] broke up with me but we're still kind of \"together\"", "post": "So my ex and I were in a long-short-distance relationship which was causing a lot of pressure on our relationship. We got very serious way too quick and that led to some arguments about trust (whether I can trust his promises about the future). This is his first relationship, which I think makes the whole thing even more stressful for him. He said that when he's with me, we feel like forever and that's why our relationship seems stressful because he's never been with anyone else before. Also, our relationship has the whole world against it--we go to different schools, and I'm at boarding school, so that exacerbates the problem. I see him once a week.\n\nSo we came up with some sort of post-break-up blob arrangement--not defined at all, right? We kiss and cuddle and have sex, he still calls me baby and tells me he still loves me, and the arrangement is all in all very confusing. Moreover, I can't reconcile the idea of him kissing another girl and then kissing me. I understand his point, I support him in his exploration (kind of) but I feel like if he wants to know what life is like without me, we shouldn't be acting like we're still in a relationship. He can't have his cake and eat it too, right? \n\nI really love him. We love each other, no doubt. I know that we're young but we've both sacrificed so much for this relationship--I applied to my second choice college instead of my first choice Early Decision (which is binding) just for him. And yes, I did settle a little bit, but the school I applied to is still incredibly rigorous and a great school in general; he's planning on going to a nearby university. Being without him will be so, so hard and I want nothing more than to be with him but I feel like I'm not actually with him in this arrangement we've come up with.\n\nI guess my final question is: which approach should I take to get him back as soon as possible? Should I go along with our weird blob of a relationship (despite my doubts), or should I cut him off (at least romantically) so he can realise what he's missing?", "summary": "serious boyfriend broke up with me to explore his options, we still act like we're together, don't know whether I should stop seeing him."}
{"id": "t3_3dh2jw", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "He (22/M) never makes the first move but is always responsive when I (24/F) do. Wasting my time?", "post": "Is this ... Normal? I'm (24/F) always the one making the first move. Ive asked him (22M) out twice. The first was with a group of friends and we had a great time and he couldn't make the second. I've told him I liked him and he didn't bring it up or anything. I also offered an open invitation of \"let me know if YOU want to hang out.\" \nBut he never initiates a conversation or asks me out but he's always responsive when I do. So ... Am I wasting my time? If I don't put in the effort does that mean he won't at all? I know it's immature to give someone the silent treatment but Im not sure what to do. We get along so well it's like we've been friends for a long time. So I'm not sure what the thought process is on his end. I'm pretty new to NOT being passive when it comes to dating so .... I'm not sure if I'm too forward or ... What.", "summary": "He never makes the first move to initiate conversation or hang outs. But when I do he's 100% responsive. What's going on? What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_fm3q3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Looking to hear stories of couples who met in HighSchool and are still together!", "post": "Hey everyone, I'm in a relationship with a girl who I met in Highschool my senior year and we've been together for six months now. She's currently a senior (was a junior when we met) and I'm going to a community college that isn't too far away from where we live. She has already been accepted to a college that's about 2 hours away from where we live so in August she leaves for 4 years.\n\n( I should also add that she plans on visiting ever so often because the distance isn't too long.)\n\nI've always planned on staying in this area because everything I need school wise is right here, however she's going to a private college hence why it's so far away. Her and I have an excellent relationship and we both plan on staying together even after she leaves.\n\nI want to know everyone else's story as far as how you guys have dealt with distance relationships due to work or college, if you guys met in high school, or how did you meet? Are you guys still together and has the distanced made you stronger or weaker?\n\nI ask this basically because I want to know how other people deal with it, I know every relationship is different but I want some real examples from someone's first hand experiences.", "summary": "OP has high school sweetheart type relationship, his GF is going to college in August, needs a bit of advice on how to maintain / is looking for first hand examples from reddit!"}
{"id": "t3_54ehjg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20F] Mom [57F] pretended to be my boyfriend's [19M] imaginary ex-girlfriend [22F]", "post": "So yesterday, while at work, I received a very weird message on my phone from a girl who pretended to be my boyfriend's ex girlfriend.\n\nShe trash talked my boyfriend, telling me she lost all her money, friends and family, because of him. That he only used her for her money. That his family is very fake (she met him supposedly) and in the end, they're going to marry him off with somebody from his own ancestry. That he dumps her, because she was older than him anyway. (Like I am) That he's very greedy (about money) and so on. That I have to watch out for him, because he has two complete different faces.\n\nWell, my boyfriend has never had a girlfriend before and I'm the first one to meet his parents and his friends, which has been confirmed. Next to that, he's the complete opposite of being greedy, so everything she said about him was a lie, expect for certain details about us (where his parents live, where we went on our summer trip) His parents are extremely upset by this person. (my mom, but they don't know that yet)\n\nI found out that she talks in the same way as my Mom does and she almost has the same phone number as her at the same provider. When I told her, his supposed ex-girlfriend, that, she immediately deleted her account.\n\nNow, my boyfriend never wants to meet my Mom and I don't know how I should approach this.", "summary": "My Mom pretended to be a supposed ex-girlfriend of my boyfriend to break us apart, and now my boyfriend never wants to meet her."}
{"id": "t3_3l0dyv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I/do I at all [20 F] tell my boyfriend [23 M] that I'm bisexual?", "post": "I've had two serious relationships prior to this one, both with women. They had no problem with me being bisexual and it was something known before the relationship -- my first girlfriend was also bisexual.\n\nI am now in a relationship with a guy. We've been exclusive for about a month. Having never faced this issue, I come to you, Reddit.\n\nIs this something that he needs to know? Is it really relevant to a hetero relationship, regardless of if one of the participants in the relationship is bisexual?\n\nIf you guys think it is necessary, when do you think is the right time? I think my biggest fear is losing him because of it. I know that I should be with someone who is fine with who I am, but I really like the guy and I'd hate for my sexual orientation to be the thing that kills this.", "summary": "in my first hetero relationship. Don't know if I should tell the guy I'm bi, or if I should, when I should."}
{"id": "t3_1cqedn", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Having a hard night...(m23) I just saw my ex's (F25) photo through a mutual friend, she's with another guy.", "post": "I was doing, really, really well until I stumbled across a photo of my ex through a mutual friend. It was a picture of her with another guy, less than a month ago that was a picture of us. \n\nIt feels like shit, my entire world literally shattered again all over from seeing that, all the memories of the breakup came back to my head and all I did was break down. For all the advice that I dole out on this forum its still hard to see this, and hard to keep it together.\n\nIts only been a month and a bit, and the pain feels as fresh as it was then...Her last words to me were \"I need real love\" and when I asked if there was someone else she just said \"Goodbye\"\n\nThe pain of not knowing if there was another person kills me every day, the pain of knowing that five years of a relationship suddenly ends because she needs \"Real love\" kills me.", "summary": "Saw a photo of my recent ex with a guy, felt like it completely ruined any progress I made. Feeling worthless as a man and as a fianc\u00e9 for not being able to provide her with \"Real love\" whatever that means."}
{"id": "t3_kfrj5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Anyone know someone getting rid of a RV?", "post": "So my husband and myself will be doing a year long fundraiser, to help other diabetics Live the Cure, through an active and natural lifestyle. \n\nWe will be climbing everyday for 365 Days across the US to do this. \n\nNow being experienced climbing dirtbags, this is not our first time at the rodeo and we are fully and completely prepared to do this on a shoe string budget and live out of our 84 Toyota Tercel in necessary. \n\nHowever a trip of this size and length clearly would be much more comfy with a little leg room and a traveling homebase to keep other interested via blogs and what not. \n\nSo that being said, if you know anyone that would be willing to donate/loan their (working) RV or Travel Trailer to us for this cause send them my way. \n\nand just so you know I'm not full of shit. \n\n[LIVINGVERTICAL] \n\nIf we weren't trying to make an impact on difference in the feeling of dread that accompanies a Type 1 Diagnosis and just wanted to climb everyday for a year for funsies, I wouldn't be trying.", "summary": "? Type 1 Diabetic. Climbing everyday for 1 year to raise money to educate other Type 1 Diabetics that life doesn't have to suck just because your pancreas does. [LivingVertical]("}
{"id": "t3_wl5m5", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Just Found GF is Cheating on me", "post": "Has the tittle says 1+ Year relationship Me (22) her (19) Even thought it was kinda an on and off  . she was really one of the few persons that changed me and had me really happy. She is a natural flirt( I guess) the kind that would stare at lot of guys and be really social. She had confessed before she had done slutty things on her teenage life including selling weed in high school. Also even thought underage she always loves to drink. Several of those slutty times of her teenage life happened when she was drunk. When i met her i kinda knew what i was kinda getting into. and we tried to worked it out . i tried something i shouldn't have never tried to do, and that was trying to changed her. She did really made a lot of mistakes in our relationship like flirting and staring. but i always gave her several chances and at the ended we worked it out (or that's what i tried to believe i was doing). So now a couple weeks ago she  left with her family to mexico. and we both know our Facebook password. And just today I decided to check it and just found out she actually already cheated on me. and even planning more of it with different guys. I really haven't even processed all of this right now. Its really too much to fucking bared . She was the only thing in my life that made my days and nights. and all of that is gone. I was already going trough the worst time of my life. and now this is gonna bring me lower i don't even know how all of this is gonna work out. Am really an introvert independent unemployed person with no close family, parents and only Friend out of the country.she was my everything. and I just feel this anger of being cheated again. I feel of going on her Facebook and calling herself a slut. even tough i might regret doing it and its sound really childlike . Please Reddit if you can convinced me not to do it. it would help me alto .", "summary": "I found trougth facebook gf is cheating on me and Am really thinking on taking revenge on her Facebook. Please convinced me not to.  "}
{"id": "t3_1uo4pa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What should I do all night? ;)", "post": "So I have a friend whom I only see once a year that is coming down to visit and she is going to spend the night at my place and we're going to pull an all nighter.  BEST THING: we're going to get drunk and have sex, we both already know it and we've even talked about it, it's a for sure thing.  Does anyone have any fun ideas what stuff we can do? (whether or not sex is involved) we are already planning to hot box my car and watch a movie or two. what are some other fun things to do? I want to do as much as possible since I wont see her till next year and this is the first time were doing this. Throw some ideas.\n \nSome things to consider are that I am living with other people so we will be confined to just my bedroom or out in my roomy car.", "summary": "Fuck budy from out of state spending 1 night at my house. what fun activities can we do? with or without sex"}
{"id": "t3_2serap", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by having access to an open bar", "post": "So this past Saturday a good friend of mine got married. At the reception he had an open bar, like all good wedding receptions do. Having left my keys and car at a friends place I figured I would go a little harder than usual knowing I wouldn't have to drive.\n\nThe reception started around 5 and ended about 10, so during that time I had become pretty drunk. Because the reception ended so early, a few of us decided to head out and hit up some of the bars downtown. \n\nThis is where the fuck up begins, and most of this I've had to piece together through third party accounts and texts/calls from the night. Heading down there I began to text this girl I had just started seeing and really liked, trying to get her to come meet us. Her and her friends decide to come out, and get there maybe an hour, hour and a half after we did. In that time I had continued to drink and past the black-out point of alcohol consumption. So we meet up, continue drinking, and around 2:00am the bars close and I hitch a ride back to the girls place. All I remember from being at the girls place is being trashed on their couch and at one point just deciding I was gonna leave. I walked out the door thinking I would walk home, about 20 miles away. Luckily I had some sense, and somehow ordered an Uber ride and got home around 4-4:30am.\n\nRoommates weren't home, and my keys were still at my friends place. Amazingly, all luck goes against me and my phone dies shortly after getting there. So I decide to just pass out in front of my apartment and hope my roommates get home early. They don't, and I end up walking to a 7-eleven to get a taxi to go get my keys and car. Finally get into my apartment around noon, charge my phone, and immediately text the girl apologizing for anything stupid I might have done and that I didn't really remember anything. All I get back is \"It's fine\" and haven't heard anything from her since. So now I'm going crazy thinking I ruined a relationship before it even had a chance to start.", "summary": "Got black out drunk, locked out of my apartment all night, and possibly ruined a new relationship. But I didn't drive drunk, so I got that goin for me."}
{"id": "t3_1b5vad", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [m29] approach my relationship with my father [60] if he is unwilling to do anything for himself?", "post": "My father is a depressive pessimistic alcoholic hermit.  He is currently unemployed. He has been fired from several jobs for various irresponsible reasons, which he will argue are/were out of his control.  He pulls the pity card any time I try to rationalize his situation with him and look for a way out.  I have to admit, I have been enabling him. I have allowed him to remain on my cell phone provider's family plan (for free) as well as utilize one of my checking accounts to pay some of his bills with the small amount of money he has to his name.\n\nTonight I found out that he has overdrawn on the checking account, so I am going to close that tomorrow. I have also since switched cell phone carriers to be on my wife's family plan (to save money), so the cell service is going to be cancelled tomorrow as well, seeing as it is only burning a hole in my fiscal pocket.\n\nI can talk with him until I'm blue in the face. I can take responsible action concerning my end of things. But there seems to be nothing to motivate him. He has had ample time to go out and get a job. He was a big rig driver (all of those jobs he squandered), now he could at least go out and get a menial job just for the income, but he doesn't. He's exhausted his retirement, fails to drawn on his pension (because he believes that he can't 'yet', so he doesn't try...either way I think it is small and he only gets half because of a divorce settlement), and he's in the process of losing his house and everything he owns.\n\nAfter I close the accounts tomorrow, what do I do?!", "summary": "Dad (60) is unmotivated to help himself and is withering away to homelessness and depression, son (29) is seemingly helpless to improve the situation."}
{"id": "t3_3k5lyx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] and my GF [21F] ended just after a few weeks.", "post": "How short does a relationship have to be for one to not care that it's over?\n\nWe met over summer break while she was vacationing in my hometown. We had an amazing summer and decided it was worth a long distance relationship since she was moving to where I live after she graduates in one semester. I bought a ticket to see her this Labor Day weekend on her request.\n\nTwo hours before my flight she called me and ended it. She said that the long distance was too hard and she didn't want to have an amazing time together just to end it after.\n\nI know we weren't together for long, but I can't get her out of my mind. To make things worse, she's is still moving to where I live and says she wants to continue the relationship at that time; but has decided to completely ignore me till then to make things easier for her. Except that doesn't make things easier on me, being a person that relies on some sort of a connection.\n\nI guess what I'm asking is how do I get through the semester while I wait for the girl that I want to be with and she completely ignores me?", "summary": "Got broken up with in a short term, long distance relationship. Still want to be with her. How do I wait?"}
{"id": "t3_1l09iu", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I find myself [21m] more attracted to one of our mutual friends [21f] than I do my girlfriend [21f]", "post": "Obvious throwaway here. Well for a little background information here, I'm part of a friend group that my SO is also part of, let's call her Amber. There is absolutely nothing wrong with her, she has a great personality and cares about me a lot. However another girl, let's call her Melissa, is also part of our friend group that consists of about 14-18 people and we see each other just about every day.\n\nMy problem is that I have found myself each and every day, especially after getting back from summer vacation, more attracted to Melissa than my SO. I have no idea what to do because we're all really good friends and it's not like I'm in an abusive relationship or anything, I just find myself to be extremely attracted to Melissa. Last night I got pretty drunk when we went out to a party and when I went to sleep the only dream I had the entire night was of me spending the night with Melissa and not my SO. I'm not talking about just sex; it was like going out to dinner, the whole deal. \n\nI'm not sure how to figure out if Melissa is attracted to me or not, because I don't want to ruin the friendship of the entire group just because I say/do something stupid. I also don't want to hurt my SO because she is a really great girl and even if I broke up with her I would still care about her quite a bit, but in a different way if that makes any sense. Please help me out here, I can give more information upon request. Names changed because privacy.", "summary": "I'm more attracted to my friend than I am my SO, the only problem is that we're all in the same friend group and it's a pretty tight knit bunch."}
{"id": "t3_m12s0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help, how can I get over being cheated on, while in a relationship?", "post": "here is my situation.. I'm 21 and I've been dating the same guy for over a year now. He's an incredible guy we get along great there is very little I cant complain about in our relationship. Before dating my current boyfriend I was in another relationship for about a year.. In that relationship there weren't many problems we didn't fight much and everything was always pretty good then one day I was asked to come over to talk and I got the break up speech. My ex told me he was no longer attracted to me, didn't love me, literally everything you don't want to hear. I spent 3 months and a summer away from him getting over him and pretty much just accepting the fact that he got bored with the relationship and decided to break up. During our summer apart I received a lot of phone calls from my ex attempting to get back together and I decided not to give him a chance considering not even a week after we broke up he was hooking up with his neighbor.. getting to the point about 3 months into my relationship with my current boyfriend I found out  from him(the girl he cheated on me with turned out to be friends with my boyfriend and told him) my ex had been cheating on me the whole time we had dated. Since finding out this truth which was eventually admitted by my ex I tend to feel very insecure about my relationship (although there is no reason for it). My current boyfriend is quick to reassure me but I experience anxiety when he goes out with his friends and I have a really hard time calming myself down. I guess Im finding it difficult to wrap my head around the fact I was cheated. I was able to rationalize the unexpected break with my ex with the fact that at least he was honest and hadn't cheated on me. \n\nHonestly I just want to know how to deal with the anxiety I experience... what kind of methods can I use to calm myself down? My current boyfriend is very understanding but I don't want to keep putting him through the same conversation about it...", "summary": "I found from my current boyfriend that my ex had been cheating on me the entire span of our relationship, I'm now experiencing feelings of insecurity and anxiety towards my current relationship."}
{"id": "t3_4hqg4m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GFs [20 F] birthday today and I [21 M] feel really bad", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for nearly a year now and it is her birthday today. I wanted to spend some time with her but she didn't bother to reply. \n\nI'm not proud of it but I logged onto her facebook and she was chatting with this guy continuously. I always figured when 2 people are really in love, they'd spend their best days with the other as well as their worsts. I had a lot planned for her and it hurt me when she didn't bother chatting with me. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to fight with her on her birthday. \n\nI know on my birthday, I'd love to spend every minute talking to her. It kinda feels like she doesn't really care that much and she has other people and when things go to shit with them, she'll come back to me. Or am I really stupid and I should let her enjoy her day?", "summary": "Girlfriend ignoring me on her birthday because shes too busy chatting with other guys. Am I stupid to feel bad about it?"}
{"id": "t3_1lunqj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24f] have trouble setting boundaries with non-close friends", "post": "if it's a close friend then I feel comfortable enough to just be bluntly honest with them about it, but anybody else I'm worried about offending them or making things awkward. last time it was my boyfriend's best friend, who just generally doesn't respect boundaries (came from a large family). it wasn't that what he was doing was wrong, it was just that it crossed my personal boundaries (invasion of personal space mostly). now it's his sister (28F) who's moved in across the street. Bf (24m) & I live in his mom (59F)'s house, so technically she can come and go as she pleases since it's her mom's house and I'm the \"guest\" (though I've been living here and paying rent for the past three years now, while the sister only just moved back to this city like 5 months ago, and then moved into the apartment across the street as of yesterday).\n\nI'm probably overreacting and in time things will settle down and normalize. She still hasn't quite gotten all of her stuff moved out of here anyways. But still, it's so hard for me to figure out how to express my feelings without offending anybody.\n\n(The incident I take issue with this morning is she came into the house while bf & I were showering & kitten-napped the kitten who was locked in our bedroom while we showered so she (the kitten) could play with her (the sister)'s cats who had also been temporarily living with us while she was here)", "summary": "i don't know how to communicate my boundaries to people i'm not close to out of fear of making things awkward or causing other problems."}
{"id": "t3_1fb4n9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How should I go about dealing with intense social anxiety?", "post": "I have been an introvert with social anxiety for as long as I can remember. I am self diagnosed but it's pretty obvious from the way I feel after years of, I guess I could call it, suffering. Anytime I am excluded by my friends, intentionally or not, I become very anxious, somewhat depressed and therefore, angry. It became significantly more problematic this past year. I was bullied, to put it bluntly. I was mocked, harassed, and for no good reason, feared for my health and safety. Being in situations like these gives me an intense sick feeling and I want to, in short, curl up and die. I frequently feel as though life would be easier if I didn't exist (even though that sentence doesn't actually make sense...) I am filled with terror at just the sight of some of these people and am constantly paranoid. I try to adopt an \"I don't care\" attitude and sometimes it makes me feel better, but I don't know how to relax and put these things out of my mind. It lead to me treating my best friend terribly and losing her, having no friends in the new place I was living, and lead to compulsive emotional eating, skipping classes (and failing exams, sure enough), rarely sleeping, and resorting to non-lethal methods of self harm as well as alcoholism for periods of time. I am seeking professional help, but I'm hoping someone out here can relate and give me some suggestions, or even just tell me that I'm not alone. I can give more information if anyone asks questions but I'm not sure what else to say at this point.", "summary": "Being bullied makes me feel physically and emotionally sick and wish I wasn't alive. Want to be able to go about my life without constantly thinking of the people I fear and having the thought of them ruin my outlook on life."}
{"id": "t3_y8hnt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(21f) wondering if my feelings for my (22m) boyfriend are lessening or if it's caused by depression", "post": "Hi /r/relationships.  \n\nFor a bit of backstory, I've had a really difficult time recently - deaths of loved ones, family drama/tension, breakup with an abusive ex boyfriend, just an overall awful year.\n\nI've been with my boyfriend about 9 months.  We were friends for years before we dated and developed an interest in each other.  Our relationship has been pretty happy so far, a couple of blips/arguments but nothing too significant.\n\nLately I've been feeling more depressed than I ever have in my life.  I used to be pretty easy-going and cried maybe three times a year.  Now I cry every few days and everyday tasks are hugely difficult.  I've lost interest in a lot of my favourite things - example, I'm a classical pianist who has practiced 2 hours every single day since I was five years old, and I haven't touched my piano in months.  I am going to counselling regularly and don't often tell friends and family about my feelings, instead preferring to just deal with it on my own.\n\nLast week I did break down and tell my boyfriend just how bad it was.  He was amazing and kind and comforting and even cried with me while I told him what was going on.  One thing I can't tell him, though, is that sometimes I feel like I don't feel anything for him at all.  Sometimes I feel a lot of love for him, sometimes I feel like I just don't care.  This isn't just limited to him, though - lately I've been feeling almost no affection for my parents or sister and I have very little interest in seeing my friends.\n\nWhat do I do, Redditors?  With this cloud of depression hanging over my head I just can't trust my feelings at all.  I'm seeing a counsellor regularly but it just doesn't seem like enough to deal with all this.  Anyone ever been in a similar situation?\n\nAlso, feel free to ask questions and I'll try to answer them, I'm not sure if I left any important details out.", "summary": "Had a rough year and have been experiencing some depression.  Not sure if my feelings for my boyfriend of 9 months are diminishing or if it's the depression.  Me (21f) him (22m)"}
{"id": "t3_cjaxb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit, how have you dealt with a close friend moving away?", "post": "He's not really the sentimental type, but I kind of am. He's moved around a lot in life and I get the sense that he'll probably forget about me and find new friends pretty quickly. This makes me happy for him but doesn't really make me feel that much better about my situation.\n\nWe were roomies for the last few months, and going from seeing him every day to not seeing him really at all has been tough :-( He's about 3 hours away for the summer, but is looking for jobs all over the country after that (he just graduated college). Due to work schedules I don't know that I'll get to see him more than once or twice this summer before he's even further away.\n\nAdvice or stories about your experiences would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "I'm having a hard time letting go of my buddy who is moving away. I don't really expect that we'll keep in touch, even though I'd like to."}
{"id": "t3_342ks2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF [25 F] and I [29 M] took a break in January. We're meeting to talk on Friday. I feel broken.", "post": "I became really depressed, bitter, and selfish in my relationship.  Work drove me up the wall and I was not fun to live with.  That's the preface, long-story-short.\n\nShe told me one night that she needed a break.  She moved out, I found a new place, and I've given her time and space.\n\nI told her that I would give her the time and space she needed, but I also said that I wanted to fight for us.  In the three months I've had, I have done a lot of soul-searching.  I have taken ownership of my faults.  I have made changes in my life to move forward in a healthy manner.  But at every turn, I can only think of her.  Every single morning, when I wake up alone... part of me dies all over again.  I'm usually a fairly strong person, but this is crippling me.\n\nWhen I originally asked her if she was done with me... with us, I was met with \"I can't answer that right now.\"\n\nI received the security deposit check from our previous landlord and we're meeting this Friday to cash that and have a talk.\n\nWe agreed that putting a timeline on talking was a bad idea, but I feel like I need to know.  She offered to bring our dog so we could see each other, but I can't help but think that this won't end well for me.\n\nI think that I've been made to feel complacent until she figures out *her* life.\n\nI'm in love.  I miss her to death.  I lead my day-to-day life, actually feeling like the best part of it is gone.", "summary": "Girl and I took a break 3 months ago and are meeting to talk for the first time since the split.  Have no idea how this talk will go.  Any anecdotes or advice would be appreciated and feel free to ask questions."}
{"id": "t3_4r9i69", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Husband [29/m] was cold and distant last night. I'm [29/f] still upset despite him apologizing this morning. Should I bring it up and probably cause a fight? Or drop it and move on?", "post": "I'll keep this short. We had a great weekend away for the long weekend. As soon as we get home he is miserable. I ask for help unpacking and doing laundry, and he huffs and puffs about it. He went from being super affectionate during our trip away to not even looking at me. I ask him what wrong and he says \"just leave me alone\". \n\nI don't get it at all. I end up going to bed alone early because he isn't making room on the couch for me and is watching a TV show he knows I hate.\n\nThis morning he apologizes for being a jerk, but I am still hurt and I don't understand why his mood changed so drastically.", "summary": "husband was mean to me last night. And I'm still upset. Do I bring it up and probably cause another fight? Or do I just move on and pretend I'm fine?"}
{"id": "t3_1pe7ym", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I[23 M] be mad with my GF [23 F] of 2 months. For something that happened months ago?", "post": "okay so me and my gf are great together, we are highly compatible. There is one thing that came to the surface last night and Its really bothering me. Before we were official, me gf and I were seeing each other for a good 4-5 months. Apparently during that time my gf and her coworker kissed. Should I be mad? \n\nHer argument is that we were not official, therefor it should not matter. My argument was that regardless of our status there should have been a mutual level of respect and understanding, and I believed there was until now.\n\n \n\nI just feel like she lied to me by not telling me. We were really close (not as friends) during the few months before we were official.", "summary": "Gf kissed another guy a few months ago while we were \"seeing\" each other. Should I be upset now?"}
{"id": "t3_iqvvi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I was filmed while driving today....", "post": "Today I was driving along, after sitting at a dealership for two hours. I came up on a double-left turn lane, and approached it sort of fast. The arrow was probably yellow, but not full-on red by any means. Other traffic was turning with me. I accidentally put it into the wrong gear (I have manual) and the truck engine-braked sort of hard as I was turning through the intersection. I imagine my nose of my truck dove from an outsiders perspective. None of this seemed odd to me. I shift incorrectly fairly often, but not this bad.\n\nI was half a mile down the road, and driving at a normal clip. From behind, a minivan with a large woman as the sole occupant pulls up next to me, with a camcorder. She is parallel to me across from my passenger window, actively filming me, my face, and my vehicle. I do a double-take, then actively ignore her. I feel my face get hot.  We drive on, then catch another red light. I notice she does not have the camera up, roll down my passenger window, and ask her \"What's the problem..?!\" She says nothing and immediately starts filming again. I smile, laugh to myself, and roll my window up to ignore her again. I am really seething inside! I am so angry I can feel my pulse in my head and all I wanted to do was get out of my truck and rip that thing out of her hand, further escalating what ever trumped-up charges she thought she had on me. I did not do anything that warranted a filming of myself. So I think. \n\nWho would do this? Could anything come of it?", "summary": "Ran a yellow light, some lady pulls a camcorder out and gets all paparazzi on my ass."}
{"id": "t3_25ull9", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "My dog has swollen salivary glands. Anyone have any experience with this?", "post": "Noticed around noon that my greyhound had two tiny lumps within her mouth, and by 2pm they had swollen up to about the size of a golf ball. We took her to the emergency vet since our regular one was booked for the day, and they told us basically just to keep her on the Rimadyl and Tramadol she was already on and there was nothing they could do without surgery.  \nI'm a little concerned; they said she'd be fine until we were able to take her the our normal vet on Monday, but the medicine doesn't seem to be doing anything and her mouth is just as swollen as it was before. The vet seemed very rushed and mostly just looked at her bloodwork and that was it. Is there a way they could drain some of the fluid to make her more comfortable? She can't eat because it's so swollen and I'm afraid it's going to make it hard for her to drink as well.  \nI just feel really unsatisfied with the way that the emergency vet handled this and I'm looking for advice. Does anyone know how much this surgery tends to cost/other treatments? She's really old and I'd love to avoid major surgery if at all possible.", "summary": "Dog has golf ball sized mass under tongue. Vet said to wait until Monday, but I'm still worried. Looking for advice."}
{"id": "t3_2k75ol", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My mother[~60F] is upset over my[21f] pregnancy.", "post": "My mom is angry that I'm pregnant, I'm happily married(for one year) and this is a planned baby. My husband[31m] is extremely excited  about the baby and can't wait.\n\nWhen we told my mother her first reaction was to tell us not to have a baby. She told me it would make my husband hate me.\n\nNow thats she realized I'm keeping the baby, she's trying to force me to have either my tubes tied or a full hysterectomy after birth. My husband and I might want another baby in 5 years or so, so obviously I want to keep everything functioning.\n\nShe cant force me to give up my reproductive rights but how can I make her stop? She's even tried to call my OB. My mom never wanted me to have children or get married, so now she's disappointed in me and tries to make me miserable.", "summary": "My moms[~60f] angry I'm pregnant[21f and married(husband[31m])] and wants to force me to be sterilized after I have the baby."}
{"id": "t3_uip0t", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Today my little girl turned four and my mom reminded me how horrid she is. [rant]", "post": "Today is my daughter's fourth birthday. My mom promised her that this year she would spend the day with her and they would go to the zoo, Monkey Joe's, or Chuck E Cheese. My daughter went to bed early, \"so I can wake up sooner!\" she told me. After she went to bed, my mom called, all excited. \"Hey Bekahbv! I'm at the airport getting ready for my trip to Los Angeles! Wish me luck!\"\n\nShe hung up on me when I reminded her of her promise, saying, \"So now I'm a horrible grandma for missing ONE birthday!\" \n\nI dreaded this morning. I left a note for my husband explaining to him what happened. (He works third shift and can't carry his cell on him at work.) I went to bed, trying not to cry for my little girl. \n\nToday has been terrible. My daughter has been crying all day, since 6 AM. My sixteen year old has been trying to cheer her up She even went to the store with her dad, bought doughnuts, bananas and apples. (Ali's favorite foods) Ali just wanted her grandma.\n\nI know it's only 11 AM here, but I can't imagine this day could get any better for my baby girl. We are broke and were only able to get her one present and we couldn't afford a birthday party.", "summary": "My mom decided to go to Los Angeles the day before my daughter's birthday, after promising my birthday girl a day filled with fun and games."}
{"id": "t3_3es0zc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (27 F) found condoms in my fianc\u00e9's (27 M) desk. We don't use them. Getting married in 54 days!", "post": "Yesterday I was looking for return address stickers in my fianc\u00e9's deck and I found condoms (specifically two 3packs each with one condom missing). I decided to ask him about it, and he said he bought them when we first got together. We only used condoms for the very beginning of our relationship (been together since 2010, and lived together since 2011). We have not used them in the last 4 years, as I got on the pill for us because he \"hated\" condoms. \n\nI looked up on Trojan's FAQs and it said that condoms are good for 4-5 years if kept properly, so these should be expired / about to expire\u2026 not be good until 02/2020 as printed on the box. It also looks like these were manufactured in 2015 if I am reading the box correctly. When I told him that he swore that's when he bought them, and only kept them around in case we needed them. \n\nNo other behavior leads me to believe he is cheating on me, but this whole condom thing is not adding up. We're getting married in less than 2 months. Help!", "summary": "\u2013 Found condoms in my fianc\u00e9's desk. He claims they were purchased when we started dating (back in 2010), but they don't expired until 2020 and appear to be manufactured in 2015."}
{"id": "t3_zuzka", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Just found out I am likely getting discharged from the military, any advice for a soon-to-be unemployed?", "post": "Last week had the interesting sensation of being awake, but not being able to motivate my feet body to move, and after it happening twice talked to a few doctors, had some blood work done and am supposed to have a cmap test done after my next attack, but the only thing they could think of that fit my symptoms is Hypokalemic periodic paralysis. If everything comes back the way doctors think it will I will definitely be discharged, likely only with an administrative discharge (genetic disorder counts as pre-existing condition.)\nNo Idea where to even start planning my life now, planned to have almost 4 more years in the service and another few years of college to convince all my ducks to queue up properly, but instead looks like i'll be  finding a new town to live in, getting  a Mcjob and focusing on surviving for a while. Can't even think about going home at this point, my family would be understanding to an extent, but don't think I could deal with the look that I failed something that most of my family has made a career out of.", "summary": "Woke up one day and couldn't move, hilarity ensues. Getting separated from military once definite diagnosis comes back, looking at no job, no house, minimal savings, what do?"}
{"id": "t3_19p2bq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23M] am in a relationship with [24F] but think I am in love with my best friend's [26M] girlfriend [25F]", "post": "Hi /r/relationships, this may sound confusing to you, it's driving me razy\n\nI [23M] am pretty confused, I've been dating my girlfriend [24F] for over a year now and things have been going well, ups and downs as is usual in relationships. Recently my girlfriend (refered to as G from now) [24F] has slept with my best friend's girlfriend [25F] (refered to as T from now), both myself and my best friend [26M] were fine with this. I have known T for a few years now as well, my best friend was dating her for a while before, then they broke up for a while and are back together now for probably over 6 months or so. I've always been attracted to T but now more so, every time I think about her I get butterflies in my stomach and I have no idea what to do about the whole situation. I don't know if I should stay with G or if it isn't fair and I should end it and wait to see what happens. Any advice or thoughts would be great. Thank you.", "summary": "I have been dating someone for a over a year and am still in love with her but think I have feelings for my best friends girlfriend. Unsure about what to do."}
{"id": "t3_33n8l8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 35M with my 42F spouse of 15 years, she wants her the father of her son to stay at our house for 5 days for his graduation", "post": "Update: I told her yesterday that he could stay here.  Thanks for the feedback everyone.  I felt that my position basically came down to I don't want him to stay here because I don't want him to stay here.  If I can't come up with a good reason for it and it's for a special occasion for my stepson, I should just do what's best for him.  I bet it will be more uncomfortable in theory than in practice anyway.  Thanks also for the replies relating past experiences from the stepson's perspective.\n\nMy wife of 15 years has a 22 year old son from a previous relationship.  He is graduating college this month and his dad will be visiting him from another country for 5 days.  His dad travels a lot and has money for a hotel, yet my wife offered for him to sleep at my place without asking me first.  \n\nShe's brought up the topic 3 times and each time I've said no.  I don't think she'd do anything with him or anything like that, but I also don't want somebody who was in a relationship with her in the past, even the far past, sleeping at my house when there's no real reason for it.  Am I being unreasonable?", "summary": "Wife wants the father of her 22 year old child to stay at our house instead of getting a hotel, which he can afford.  Am I being unreasonable in saying absolutely not?"}
{"id": "t3_heimq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm thinking of applying for Pharmacy Technician position in San Antonio, TX", "post": "However, I wonder if it's worth it.\n\nApparently certification is obligatory in Texas, so in order to even apply for the job, you will need to be certified and registered prior to applying (at least that's what I was told by a Walgreens technician).\n\nLooking around I see books for $40 as a review for the test, $125 for the test, and a recurrent $40 every 2 years to maintain your registry status. Whilst the pay is around $9~$14 (I'm assuming you get $14 only if you have worked for a long period of time). Oh, and taking the test and getting registered seems to take almost if not over 2 months since you have to apply for the exam, take it, get results back, apply for registration, and then 2~3 weeks for it to be processed.\n\nThis makes me wonder if it's even worth the trouble.\n\nI graduated from a university and have a bachelor's degree in Biology with a sad 2.5 GPA which hinders my ability to find a job in my field (or I suppose I lack a good understanding of my field, I've only worked as a research assistant before and that was work-study).\n\nI thought of applying for a pharm tech position because I want to get a good understanding of what it entails to be a pharmacist from a hands on point of view. I considered the possibility of continuing my education (after accumulating some experience since with just the GPA will make me a laughing stock for the registrar office) in pharmacy, but question whether I am up for the job.\n\nDon't get me wrong though, I actually do need a job. 20k in student loans isn't easy to pay off without some dough. Granted, my parents paid off most of it already but now I get to pay my parents.\n\nI'm mostly hoping for advice, or you know, a job if you happen to have one laying around.\n\nI'm also looking at research assistant jobs (I've mostly worked with budding yeast) but haven't received any replies yet or the job postings require experience I don't have.", "summary": "Pharm Tech certificate required in TX, cost quite a bit, salary not much better than cashiers, is it worth it?  I fail at college.  I need a job. Cover letters suck."}
{"id": "t3_1h8cca", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24m] Broke up 6 weeks ago. Back to feeling hopeless and lonely", "post": "I'm not sure the details of the breakup are relevant here. I felt like shit for the first 2 weeks or so then picked myself up. I'd been feeling great and doing more stuff for myself and with mates, going out etc.\n\nI was sick this week and off work until Wednesday. Since then, I'm back to feeling awful, lonely and hopeless and she's back to the front of my mind. I haven't been able to concentrate since I've been back at work and I don't know what to do with myself.\n\nAlso have a really strong urge to call her/see her and try to talk which I know is stupid.\n\nAdvice?", "summary": "broke up 6 weeks ago, felt like shit for ~2 weeks, picked myself up, felt great, got sick this week and am feeling horrid again."}
{"id": "t3_ttigs", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Car accident advice.", "post": "I'm coming here to see if anyone would be willing to give me some advice on my chances of getting the person, who caused my recent car wreck, to pay for the damage to my car. So here's what happened. I was traveling about 30mph about 1 to 1 1/2 car lengths behind the person in front of me. As the driver in front of me was about to pass through our approaching intersection with a red light system, another car (the one who technically caused the accident) blew through his red light which caused the car in front of me to slam on his brakes which didn't give me enough time to stop so I rear ended him. The driver who ran the red light did not hit anyone so he kept on driving. There was no serious damage to the person I hit but my car has some damage to the bumper/hood but not internal damage that I can see.\n\nSo we called the cops, got a report, and they gave me a citation which I expected due to the rear end aspect. Here's the kicker. There was a witness who followed the driver which ran the red light and took down his license plate number. He gave all of that information to the police and gave me his contact information. He told me that he would testify on my behalf if I requested him to. \n\nThe reason I'm trying to find out is because I only have liability coverage on my insurance policy and since it's a rear end, the damage is considered my fault and probably not covered. What are my chances that I could hold the person who ran the red light responsible for my damages? Does having a witness help my chances or is this just a case of he said she said bs? I haven't gotten a quote on my damage yet so I don't know if it's worth the cost of having to lawyer up. If I had to make an educated guess I'd say around $1500-2000 worth of damage and labor. Is this something my insurance company should pursue? \n\nThanks in advance for any advice.", "summary": "Rear ended someone because another driver ran a red light. Have a witness and want to know if I can hold that driver responsible."}
{"id": "t3_v69aq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What do salespeople do that you cannot stand?", "post": "I recently went into a salon with a Groupon that I paid for in advance. After I had my hair cut, I was sent to the register to pay my bill. The girl at the register rings me up, takes my Groupon then asks if I like the products used in my hair. I told her I did and she started showing me the products on the shelves, grabs one and asks if she should ring it up for me. I gracefully declined as even though I made myself get my hair cut, I still am a broke college student. She wouldn't take no for an answer. She went on about how I am ruining my hair by not using their products and that it is a worthwhile investment. I again reminded her that it is not my lack of desire for the product that stops me, but my lack of money. She continues. We went back and forth for a while until I couldn't stand it anymore, it took me raising my voice and saying, \"MONEY, I don't have it\" before I could leave the tip for my stylist and walk out of there. \n\nSalespeople, do not milk my money udders, they are empty.", "summary": "Want to buy? I'd love to, but I just don't have the money right now. But is amazing, want buy? Sorry, not now. Plz want buy? NO. Want buy? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO."}
{"id": "t3_3ovh67", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "How motivation changes.", "post": "I wanted to tell my story of motivation so far, and maybe it will help some folks who aren't sure what/where their motivation comes from.\n\nA few months ago, I had someone I loved very much go away. My heart was broken. Our situations were the cause, so it wasn't something that either would have chosen if they were different. This set something off in my brain. This is when I started my weight loss journey. At first, it was the only thing that distracted from my broken heart. As time went on, I also questioned if my motivation to lose weight was JUST because of this. \nRecently, I was able to reconnect with her. It is nothing like it was, but it's what I desperately wanted that whole time. But today, I had a realization that my weight loss path and the road to a healthier version is more important to me now. I still want to reconnect with that person, but I know now, I am only getting healthy for myself. It was a great feeling. I know I will keep going with or without them in my life. She was the catalyst to start, but not the fuel to keep going. I found that in myself.", "summary": "If you have doubts about your motivations, sometimes the spark that caused the change doesn't matter. It's what fuels you along the path that matters. Find your fuel and trust in it."}
{"id": "t3_13uqih", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (F24) think my best friend likes my boyfriend (M24) and I don't know what to do", "post": "My boyfriend and I are both 24 and have been together now for almost a year.  Recently, I noticed that my best friend acts a little different around my boyfriend.  At first, I didn't think much of it but after I put everything together, I've come to the conclusion that she's majorly crushing on him.\n\nFirst of all, I ALWAYS catch her staring at him.  I've stopped inviting her over to hot tub with us because the second my boyfriend takes his shirt off, she can't seem to stop from staring.  She also gets that nervous laugh when he's around.  Like she'll laugh at every little thing he says and tries to be all cutesy.  Grrr.\n\nThis weekend, I had a party at my house so both my best friend and boyfriend were there.  My boyfriend hadn't been feeling well all weekend so he decided to head to bed early.  So he goes upstairs to my room to sleep and not even five minutes later, my best friend's asking where he is.  I told her he went upstairs, that's when she said, \"Ugh!  He never told me good night!\"  So she marches upstairs to my room to tell him good night.  10 minutes later, she comes back downstairs and says, \"I tucked him in.. he's so cute.  Hehehe.\"  At this point, I just roll my eyes and try to blow it off but it's still really bothering me.  \n\nSo I don't know what to do.  How do you talk to your supposed BEST FRIEND about crushing on your boyfriend?", "summary": "My best friend's being inappropriate around my boyfriend (M24) and I (F24) don't know how to talk to her about it."}
{"id": "t3_1qgj03", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [28M] roommate hit on me [25F], I turned him down, but things are awkward now...", "post": "On Thursday night my roommate (who is extremely attractive) and I were sitting on the couch drinking and watching TV - not unusual.  He started to come closer towards me, which I thought nothing of, and then put his arm around me and started moving in closer.  I wish I could say I was in the right mind and moved away from him, but I was drunk too and, as I said, I find him extremely attractive.  In a moment of clarity (before anything could happen) I looked at him and told him this was probably a huge mistake - we still have six months on our lease - and someone may end up getting hurt if we let anything happen between us.  It was hard for me, due to how much I genuinely like him as a person and how attractive I find him, but I think I made the right decision.\n\nThings have been slightly awkward since, and as much as I am trying to forget about it, I can't stop thinking about him - we are great friends and get along so brilliantly.  I am about 3 months out of a long relationship and never expected something like this to happen with him.  I guess my question is...do I say something to him about what happened or should I just ignore what happened and try to forget?", "summary": "My roommate and I are attracted to each other, and he made a move, which I (begrudgingly) turned down.  Do I ignore it or say something to him?"}
{"id": "t3_zban2", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Where should 16m ask a 16f to go on a first hangout/study/date?", "post": "Hey guys. There is a girl in one of my college classes (early college so we are 16/17, basically juniors in high school, mixed in with normal college students) and she is very cute. I want to ask her out. My plan is to introduce myself in the library (we both seem to hang out there after and in between classes) Then talk about class and stuff... Then leave with an invitation to go out somewhere and hopefully her number but where to go... Neither of us can drive but there is a cafe on campus but it kinda sucks (always full and nothing good to eat) Would it be ok to ask her to go on a short walk (about 10-15 mins off campus, possibly during our 2 hour break) to get coffee/doughnuts(at dunkin doughnuts). Also should I disguise it as a study time instead of directly using the word date? The only issue with this plan is the class that we share (that I know of she may have other classes that I have just at different times) is really easy (world religions) and doesn't really require and studying.", "summary": "I like a girl at my school. Open campus but neither of us can drive. Would a 10-15 min walk (in Florida heat) be ok to go get coffee?"}
{"id": "t3_12pwr0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24f]Am I wrong for bringing up the past when an ex tries to be friends and pretend like its a clean slate?[24m]", "post": "Am I a bitch for telling him i want nothing to do with him? Why i let go - he (24m) never really understood me (24f) and saw me as the perfect gf and after we broke up bc of trust issues he could not talk to me about the real issues (the lies he told me, communication issues, incompatible goals and personalities)...\n\nNothing i was saying was affecting him! he kept trying to chalk it up to circumstances. I was very patient but eventually i realized we should not be friends and told him to leave me alone for good. \n\nHis friends were telling me he was getting emo about me and even though he started to date someone else, he was lying to her too.\n\n1.5 years later I thought we would have a proper adult convo and get closure but he is still trying to blame game, saying that i didnt care about his goals or dreams, etc. \n\nI was doing my best to be objective and try to see it from his side, but after all that time i spent explaining to him he still wouldnt accept responsibility for degrading all my trust i had for him which is common thing that makes people stop caring about each others futures together.\n\nWhat can I do or say to help him move on? I dont want to feel guilty for bringing up the horrid past but every time i try to be honest i end up sounding cruel or emotionless (like telling him to stop running from the past and taking resp. for his actions and their consequences). \n\nHe already apologized but i get angry when he acts like everything is forgotten and that i will see him in a NEW light. I have a hard time being fake nice and sympathetic to someone who wont talk bluntly to me - I get annoyed with casual formalities bc I still see all his actions as FAKE and incongruent with reality.", "summary": "ex was trying to be very nice and start over, not talk about the past but I cant be fake nice and act like we just met for the first time again. I still see him as a liar and a phony."}
{"id": "t3_53ke3i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 F] am scared that my SO [19 M] might be cheating...", "post": "So my boyfriend (19/M) and I (18/F) have been dating for about 2 or 3 months now but I have a gut feeling that something isn't right. Sometimes when we're laying down in bed or driving in the car and he gets a text he'll turn his phone screen to make sure that I can't see it. When he sets his phone down the screen is always facing down and if I pick up his phone even to just move it he freaks out. We had one really bad fight and he left me crying outside, since then we've talked and everything seems to be okay but he still hides his phone and now will take hours to text back and often tries to cancel hanging out. Am I over thinking it or could he be up to something?", "summary": "My boyfriend hides his phone, freaks out if I even touch it, and often tries to cancel plans. Could he be cheating?"}
{"id": "t3_1zl3nt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me, [17/M] has no idea how to flirt/date/ask out a girl who likes me [16/F]", "post": "Alright, so there's this girl I met this year in chemistry, she's a year younger than me (junior in HS) but *definitely* likes me and I kind of like her back. Problem is, I have zero dating experience and have no idea how to \"flirt\" beyond the small talk we're having in class (in chemistry) or whatever else we're talking about.\n\nLike, no clue whatsoever. I'm not sure if she knows I like her, and I'm afraid if I just ask her out of the blue if she wants to go on a date she'll see it as waaaay too forward. So what can I do to be sure of whether she likes me or not? Or should I just ask her out to dinner or something?\n\nAgain, no experience on flirting or dating or anything. Halp!\n\nALSO: I don't really see her alone, it's pretty much always in class, with people hanging out, or in the hallway. So unless I ask her out I can't really talk to her alone I think.", "summary": "Think a girl likes me, I like her back, no idea how to ask her out or gauge if she actually does like me, stuck doing small talk still."}
{"id": "t3_1cq2ok", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Can't seem to get out of relationship [FM 20s]", "post": "Been with SO for two years. We work together and I want out, but everytime I try, SO freaks out, cries, gets angry, so I end up feeling awful and agreeing to keep on keeping on. Why does anyone want to be with someone they know is miserable? Why am I so weak?\n\nI've heard it's best to end it before it goes on too long, but sometimes going on is just what happens to the young and inexperienced like myself. I know I am making a mistake. I just can't help but not want to cause pain.\n\nAlso, I know that SO might badmouth me, have angry outbursts at me, and try to destroy me at work. So there's that. Sometimes I have terrible thoughts about getting out without having to deal with my SO. Thoughts like making myself.... disappear forever. It's just so much easier said than done to \"just break up.\" I can't believe I let it get this far. SO thinks we're fine and dandy. I'm not.\n\nI wish they'd just let me go. Calmly, quietly, lovingly. Just let go. Help?", "summary": "Want to end it with SO, but I am too weak/scared to do it, much less stick with it when I try to."}
{"id": "t3_3faz70", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "I unknowingly took my dosage too early...", "post": "I'm taking Cephalexin 500mg for every 6 hours (it says 4 times a day). However, since I had to wake up early in the morning to take a regular dosage,   I had no recollection of taking it at all when I woke up later. I was so sure I didn't take it, so I took another dosage. After counting my pills, it seems that I actually DID take a dosage early in the morning..so I pretty much took a following dosage 3.5 hours after the previous one. Is this bad? I've been regularly doing 6 hours apart. Will this damage my liver?", "summary": "Supposed to take Cephalexin 500mg 6 hours apart, and I took a following dosage after 3.5 hours. Will this do any damage to my liver or is there any concern?"}
{"id": "t3_2g8vgf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my BF [23M] of 10 months, he wants other women (advice from men, please!)", "post": "If you really love your girlfriend, do you want to have sex with other people? \n\nMy boyfriend admitted to me that longterm monogamy scares him (to the best of my knowledge, all of his previous relationships were monogamous) and that he'd like to have 'something on the side' once a year or so, because novelty is appealing. \n\nI'm a biology nerd and love makes the male brain release vasopressin, which in turn makes a man want to be loyal to his mate. Since the desire to be loyal seems to be lacking, I wonder whether the love is, too. I'm not saying that he would cheat on me - he's a good guy and I trust him completely. But he wants me to sanction him sleeping with other women (a small fraction of the time, but still). \n\nI said that a FFM threesome once a year would be okay, because that would hurt way less than him being with someone else intimately alone and I think I can handle it. \n\nBut I'm starting to have doubts now, because I think that if we're in this really long term (ie: forever) it wouldn't work long-term. I think I might get really jealous and butthurt and that would destroy our relationship. And I really, really love this guy so that would beyond suck.\n\nBut basically I want to know from you guys (the men):", "summary": "If you really love your girlfriend a lot, would you still want other women, too (assuming you've always been in monogamous relationships - this isn't a question for swingers)? Would she not be enough?"}
{"id": "t3_244b1n", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Does 1 'bad' Puppy ruin a Litter ??? (X-Post /r/GreatDanes)", "post": "I have been researching endlessly for almost 6 months before deciding on getting a great dane.\n\nI am in the vancouver bc area and have found a selection of breeders within BC Alberta and Washington. Ive contacted many breeders and found a few that I feel comfortable with and are having a litter of puppies ready for june/july\n\nWe have been looking at a litter of harlequins after seeing them at a local show but am worried by some possible red flags.\n\nThe litter had 7 puppies, 4 with the traditional spotting and 3 almost fully white. The breeder is waiting to have the ears/eyes and other issues that are common with white danes before commiting to any sort of sale. \n\nThis seems like a responsible thing to do however,\nShould I be nervous of these imperfections within the litter? is this any sort of indicator on possible genetic flaws I may be paying for in the future?\n\nAny help is much appreciated, and feel free to ask any questions.", "summary": "Buying a great dane puppy, one is pure white and potentially deaf, does this have any effect on the rest of the litter or reflect the quality of the breeder?"}
{"id": "t3_3oe7dx", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Injury and training questions from a recovering idiot.", "post": "Hello all, and thanks in advance. So, I have been an athlete my whole life, started competitive soccer and other sports when I was 5 (27 now), and have always considered myself physically fit. About 4 years ago, I moved to Hawaii and basically became a beach potato with almost no consistent physical activity for the first time in my life. A year and a half ago, I had a baby with my fiance, moved back to the Mainland, and decided I needed to get my life on track for the benefit of my child (now children). So I quit smoking tobacco and signed up for a half marathon. I was doing my best to follow a training program I found on Garmin Connect, but about 8 weeks into the training I started pushing too hard, running too many miles too fast, a classic rookie maneuver, I know, but it felt so good to build strength in my body and I began to rely on the peaceful solace I found running alone, away from the chaos of raising now 2 small children. Anyway, after a nice long run, a hot shower and a nap, I squatted slightly to pick up my son, and I felt a *pop* in my 2nd toe on my left foot. It swelled immediately, and was painful to walk on, let alone run, for (the past) 6-7 weeks, and although MUCH improved this past 2 weeks, I still feel it occasionally. I did some research and I think it may be either Metatarsalgia or Capsulitis, the symptoms match both somewhat. So my questions are these: would it be stupid to try and run again before the symptoms completely dissipate? and when I do start running again, what mileage is safe? Should I start with a c25k (really don't want to be re-injured)? I was running 5-6 miles 4 days a week, with a long run about 8 miles, again, from not running in years in about an 8-10 week span.\nThanks for the help, and all the inspiration and motivation! (longtime lurker here)", "summary": "How long should I spend recovering from a toe tendon injury, and how many miles should be my starting base, for a first-time half-marathoner, long-time athlete?"}
{"id": "t3_cbnuo", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What do I say?", "post": "Basically, I can't have a conversation with the girl I have immense feelings for because I'm afraid of rejection. I also have no idea what to talk about with her. I think to myself \"She probably won't care at all about whatever I say so why bother trying?\" \n\nI had a scenario today where it was me and her all alone pretty much cleaning up a mess and we didn't say a word to each other other than to pass the soap or whatever. It was awkward for me and I feel as if I should have made conversation but I don't know what to talk about at all. \n\nI will be seeing her tomorrow also so any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "What do I say to make conversation to take my mind off the fact the most amazing girl is right in front of me?"}
{"id": "t3_1g85qq", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [26M] recently got the number of a girl [23F] at the bar only to hang out with her once and fall for her friend.", "post": "First time poster here, I hope I'm meeting all the requirements.\n\nSo about two weeks ago I meet this cute girl at the bar and we chat it up for a bit.  I decide to get her number and see if she wants to go out sometime.  We chat for about a week or so via text and yesterday she invites me out with her and some friends of hers for drinks.  So I go meet with them, and I am not really feeling any spark between us.  I can tell she is into me, and I think shes pretty fun to talk to but I really don't feel any romantic attraction.  Turns out though that her friend that joined us is another story...  This isn't a case of a dude just going for the hotter of the two friends, please don't think that.  Both of them are cute girls, I just felt a definite attraction to her friend. Her personality sucked me right in.  \n\nNow, after I left for the night the first girl sent me a text saying she had a good time and we should get together again. I can tell she likes me, but I just want to be friends.  I'm not sure how to get out of this one without looking like a total asshole, but how can I let her down easy and still have a chance with her friend?  For the record, I have no idea if the friend is interested in me, I'm sure that if she was she wouldn't make it obvious in front of her friend who brought me out as a potential suitor. \n\nThanks in advance.", "summary": "Obtain girls number at bar only to hang out with her later and fall for her friend instead, don't want to be an asshole."}
{"id": "t3_3bqim4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28M] just can't seem to get over someone [27F] and would like some advice.", "post": "I dont have a lot of experience when it comes to dating or romance in general.  I never had a girlfriend.  Because of that I think I might latch onto people that I shouldn't latch onto.\n\nI developed this crush on this girl i met about 6 months ago.  She made the first move, by getting drunk and making out with me.  I was smitten ever since.  When she sobered up however she wasnt so keen on getting together, and strung me along for a few months.  However, I eventually got tired of it and forced her to make a decision.  She said no, and hooked up with some random dude like a week later.  That really hurt.  Now I understand all this but I still can't get over her.  She can flirt with me a little bit, and I immediately swoon again. I eventually come back to my senses, and then I feel like shit again. repeat\n\nThis is so incredibly frustrating.  She's not a terrible person, but logically, I understand she treated me poorly.  Logically, I don't think we'd have a good relationship. Logically, I think the only reason I like her is because she is attractive and is the only girl I've ever known who chose me to be the object of her affection for a short period of time.  I understand all this and yet I can't get over her.  \n\nWhat makes it worse is I have to see this girl a lot because we live in the same apartment complex and our social groups are very intertwined.  I made it for 3 and a half months actively avoiding her, but that just made me constantly think of her because I had to ask around to avoid her schedule.  After the 3 months, she can still just flirt with me a little bit, and all these dumb feelings come up again.  How do I get over this girl once and for all?  How do I not care?", "summary": "I fell for a girl.  I dont think this girl is good for me, but  I can't get over her because I'm so inexperienced.  Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_4pt49r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Stuck in a situation with a co-worker of mine who I like.", "post": "So I'm 21 years old (Male). I started to get feelings for a co-worker of mine who happens to be fairly older than I am. I was getting the impression she was flirting with me so I asked her out. She said I was so sweet, and I got her number. \n\nA friend of mine who works with us said that this lady I'm attracted to told her \"I hope he (Me) thinks were just friends I'm too old for him.\" I didn't find this out until a couple of days later. By that time I had already texted her, and told her to let me know when shes free to go get drinks. I got a reply back saying ok so I thought I was golden.\n\nAt this point I'm playing the waiting game to see when she might ask me to get a drink. If she doesn't say anything for another week should I just ask one more time with a set date? I'm not sure whether I should even continue pursuing partly because of that remark she said to my friend. I haven't expressed my feelings of attraction to her yet. I would have done it by now but the only thing I'm afraid of is if she might feel wierded out. Any advice would be great!", "summary": "Stuck In a situation on whether I should continue to pursue a woman I work with who I'm not sure is attracted to me or not."}
{"id": "t3_1rybxa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15 M] with my crush [15 F] Tips on how to talk to her, how to prepare to talk to her", "post": "Hey Guys! I'm here again to get some advice about talking to a girl that scares me shitless and gives me butterflies. \n\nEverytime I see this girl in the hallways my mind freezes. I get super scared because I want to talk to her but I'm scared of what she'll say, if anything. it almost feels like half of my brain is telling me to just talk to her and the other half of my brain is scared shitless about what the other half will say to her. It's hard to understand haha. I rarely talk to girls and have had very few friends that are girls. Maybe 2 or 3 or something. I can speak to them just fine because I'm not attracted to them. \n\nI just need a huge confidence boost is basicaly what I'm getting at, I just finished a great workout and feel fantastic ( Before I felt like shit because I didnt say hi to the girl I liked, I planned to but pussied out )\nI'm jsut wondering, how do I get super pumped during the heat of the moment? Any tips? Thoughts? Suggestions?\n\n I've never talked to this girl befoer and she doesnt really know me, I'm just kinda winging it hoping for a good outcome. Maybe her phone number or something. I only see her once a day and it's very brief (on the way to lunch/ during lunch). Thanks so much for reading this huge thing!", "summary": "I need some tips one how to get pumped so I can talk to this girl I really like and not fuck up, maybe possibly get her number."}
{"id": "t3_3mm4rf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [33 F] found out my boyfriend [35 M] of six years created an OkCupid account while I was out of town.", "post": "The other week I found out that my boyfriend of 6 years created an okcupid account while I was out of town for work.\n\nI found out about the account because I saw messages from OkCupid when he logged into his email. Later I went to okcupid.com on his computer and he was logged in. No major detective work here. His profile is fairly bare with no picture, but states that he is single, and I can tell that he has looked at other women's profiles and \"liked\" them. He has no messages in his inbox, but you can delete those right? I haven't ever used the site.\n\nI didn't bring it up to him for a few days because I just didn't want to think about it. When I finally told him that I had found the account, he admitted it to me. He said he had looked at women's pictures but that's it. His reason why was that \"I was out of town,\" which is fucking stupid.\nWe are generally a good couple, and though of course we fight about stupid shit sometimes, this is the first time I've had trust issues with him. He's a bartender and often doesn't come home until 7 am, but I've always just trusted that he just gets off work late and then maybe has a few drinks with his coworkers. I travel often for work and never assumed that he was looking to meet up with other women while I was gone.\n\nSo, am I being a total fucking shmuck? What would you do? I will be devastated if he cheats on me, and I'm not even sure that he is trustworthy anymore. Can I believe him if he says it was nothing?", "summary": "Found out my boyfriend of six years started an okcupid account. Wondering if this means our relationship is a sham."}
{"id": "t3_eybvu", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Is anyone else here afraid to drive?", "post": "I am not afraid of the part of operating a two ton vehicle, that's easy. I'm terrified of others driving. I'm a safe driver (do I sound like a douche?) I see other's texting, eating, even changing.. idiots driving drunk. \n\nI would find driving enjoyable if I was the only person who had a car. IF I had my way, I'd take all of your cars and I'd be the only one in the world with one. Heh, :p. But as of now, I find it freaking terrifying! I only drive to work and close places by. It seems to me that I'm the only one not use to it. People are so relaxed, calmed. It's like driving it's a second nature to them. When I get behind the wheel, I don't necessarily freak out but I just get paranoid that I might die because some idiot wasn't' careful or paying attention. \n\nI don't know. I think i'm a weirdo. I've been driving for 3 years now, had close experiences to crashing. The first day mom took me out to teach me some driver skipped his stop and he was a few inches away from hitting my side. I almost shat my pants.", "summary": "I'm afraid to drive because of others. I have been close to accidents before. I feel like I'm the only one."}
{"id": "t3_2imdwo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my boyfriend [22 M] duration, short-description", "post": "My boyfriend (22m) and I (21f) recently broke up from a 3 year relationship because he said he did not see a future and was scared to commit. We love each other and love being around each other but I am scared of being with someone who in the end might not want anything serious from me, which I am ready for. Everyone says I need space, and I know i do but it is so hard to stay away. It wouldve been easier if one of us lost feeling or didnt care, but both of us dont. I make it seem a lot like I want to be with him, but its so hard to feel insecure in such a relationship where you devote all your energy, love and time. We also happen to see each other often because we work within one block of each other in the city. Seeing how everyone I know gives me some biast answer I need the criticism of you fellow redditors. Do I end things completely ( because I too feel like I am leading him on by feeling so happy when I see him) since I do not think we can last with any insecurities or do I give it one more chance and see what happens?? I would appreciate anything anyone sends my way.", "summary": "My ex and I love spending time together but I had to let him go because he doesnt want to commit, but I cannot stay away. Should I stay away for good or give it another chance if he says he will change??"}
{"id": "t3_tpqys", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the worst thing you've \"let happen,\" because you knew the results would be hilarious?", "post": "*", "summary": "I could have helped my dog's precarious situation, thus preventing injury to the love of my life, but I didn't. The outcome was pretty funny. I'm a bad person. "}
{"id": "t3_1xaqbi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21/F] Him[21M/] Am I blowing things out of proportion or is my anger reasonable? confusion", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for over two years now. Just recently he's joined his local gym. Yes it's good for him, him joining the gym getting healthy and improving fitness. \n\nHowever, he keeps telling me how he sees all these girls with nice bums in yoga pants and how very fit they are, how he doesn't intend to perv on them but they just so happen to be in-front of him whilst he's doing his thing. I don't know if its reasonable for me to feel angry and annoyed or whether I'm simply blowing things out of proportion and going overboard with jealousy? Is this a normal reaction?\n\n Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.", "summary": "Bf recently joined the gym making comments on girls asses and how fit they are. Reasonable for me to be angry? or am I simply blowing things out of proportion?"}
{"id": "t3_4ywi5n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] feel like my Girlfriend [24F] is losing interest in sex.", "post": "I already posted this to r/deadbedrooms, but I figured I would post it here as well. \nOk, i'm honestly very confused and I'm not sure whether I'm being childish or whether my concerns are warranted. I (23M) have been dating my girlfriend (24F) for just about six months. For pretty much the entire relationship we have been having sex around two to three a week. The frequency of our sex has remained relatively consistent throughout or relationship, although as of recently is becoming less frequent. \n    Whats bothering me the most though is her lack of interest when it comes to sex. At the beginning of our relationship she would often be the first to initiate via flirty texts, kissing ect. But as of recently She has shown practically no interest in sex. I will try to initiate but more often than not i'll get shut down. And when we do have sex it feels like she does it just to appease me. Like she'll say \"I guess we can have sex if you want to\" which to me is a total turn off. \n     I feel like it is important to note that she has told me time and time again that this is the best sex of her life (she gets off almost every time) and she is completely happy with our sex life. Like I said earlier I'm not sure whether we are heading towards a dead bedroom or whether I am being paranoid. Obviously I have a Higher sex drive then her and although I would love to have sex more often, I understand that her sex drive is lower and I'm fine with twice a week. I just don't understand why it seems like she never actually wants to have sex. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "girlfriend doesn't seem interested in sex anymore. I feel like 6 months is early in the relationship for that to happen."}
{"id": "t3_4656ls", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28M] with my ex girlfriend [26/F] of 5 years, after months of no contact she texted me. Not sure what to do.", "post": "My ex girlfriend of 5 years Amy (26F) and I(28M) broke up at the end of the summer, she suffers from borderline personality disorder and this put a tremendous strain on our relationship over time. \n\nI suffered a great deal of manipulation and emotional abuse over those years and even though we had some good times i know in hindsight I should have gotten out sooner. \n\nDuring the relationship Amy lied about many things large and small, anything from saying someone was just a friend (who would later turn out to be a former fwb, love interest etc) to things like trying to hide smoking and a drinking problem from me. \n\nWe agreed to break up mutually but shortly thereafter she began to message me expecting me to be her emotional crutch and being angry at me for spending time with female friends. After lashing out at me and spreading rumors I just cut contact. A month or two later she reached out and I politely but quickly ended the conversation. \n\nA week ago she messaged me again just saying, 'hey....' I didn't reply yet but I can't help but feeling bad. Despite things turning south after an amicable breakup I still feel bad not replying, even briefly. Also we're from a decently small town so I will run in to her at some point and I'd like to try and keep things civil at least. \n\nSo my question is, should I at least be courteous and reply? Or is just not answering an acceptable, non rude option. I don't want to get back with her, or give the impression that I'm open to regular communication. But I don't want to hurt her either.", "summary": "ex of 5 Years texted me after months of no contact. Don't want to open the door for regular communication but don't want to be rude either."}
{"id": "t3_1nltcz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my friend [20 F] of 1 year, Interested in dating her", "post": "Around this time last year I met a girl in one of my classes and we became acquainted. A short time later she was talking to me about how she was struggling in her chemistry class and I offered to tutor her in it since that's my major and I'm pretty good at it. So I help her out and she's grateful, I'm attracted to her but she has boyfriend at the time so nothing happens but we become decent friends. Anyways after class went out over the summer we didn't talk much up until a month ago when she suddenly starts talking with me again and is asking me to take classes with her next quarter. So I do and we start getting very close texting every day, flirting, and such but I don't have a chance to see her due to conflicting schedules. I also learn that she recently broke up with her boyfriend.\n\nThen two weeks ago class starts and a week later she starts acting kind of disinterested. Which sucks because I've just realized I like her and want a relationship with her. We still get along great when we're together, she just acts a little weird when we text and we no longer do it as often. \n\nI'm going over to hang out/tutor her later today and was wondering if anyone had tips on how I should act around her, assuming I'm still interested. Confessions typically end poorly, correct?\n\nSome other stuff to note is she has never told me about her boyfriend, I found out they were together and had broken through one of her friends and a picture on her facebook (she had her relationship status hidden). Also I asked her out to dinner last week and she said \"We can if you want\" Or something like that. And she is extremely shy, much more so than any girl I've ever known.", "summary": "Friend ended her relationship a few weeks ago and I'm interested in dating her. I'm new to dating and need advice."}
{"id": "t3_3diyt5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[30F] with my boyfriend [30M] of 5 years, not sure if i'm weird, or he is", "post": "Hi! \n\nMy boyfriend used to watch a lot of porn before we dated, and describes himself as \"jerking off all the time\". I know he slowed down since we moved in together. Recently, I caught him masturbating to a coworker's Facebook picture. \n\nHe doesn't understand that I see a difference between pleasuring himself to porn and pleasuring himself with a real person he works with. He doesn't think it's any different and is disorting the issue. \n\nTo me, there is a major difference, and I am not comfortable with the situation at all. \n\nSo I'm wondering... \nGUYS :  Is it a normal guy thing? Do men in general don't see the difference between jerking off to someone you share your environment with, is it just as unpersonal to you as porn is? \n\nGIRLS : Am I over reacting? Would you be comfortable with this?", "summary": "Boyfriend jerked off to a coworker. Doesn't see why I think its different than porn or why I'm upset. .. Any thoughts on who needs to chill?"}
{"id": "t3_1cly93", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is your theory on the ramifications of automated manufacturing/services?", "post": "I've been thinking a lot about automated manufacturing/services, and how it is poised to permeate into all aspects of our society. An interesting example is the driver-less car that Google is developing, not only will it affect everyday commuters, but it will effect industries where driving is the primary source of income, trucking, cabs, pizza delivery, etc. I feel sweat shops in China aren't even safe. Why pay a human being who will most likely get fatigued, burnt out, or demand better pay/working conditions when they can be replaced by machines that only require basic maintenance?\n\nIt will be interesting to see how society and the economy adapts, as automation will turn us on our head. Especially when you think about basic economics, if potentially billions of people are going to be put out of a job in the next twenty years, they will no longer have income. Without income they can no longer buy the products being manufactured, which in turn would cause product manufacturing to recede on all fronts. No matter how you look at it, the current economic model will not be able to adapt well to full automation of the world. \n\nIt's terrifying and exciting at the same time. What are your thoughts?", "summary": "Automation is only going to get better and more precise, leaving billions out of a job, what do you think this will do to our society/economy worldwide?"}
{"id": "t3_emrtb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey reddit! Feel like helping a long-time lurker with some inspiration?", "post": "As my title said, I'm a long-time lurker at reddit (and especially programming as subreddit) and today I'm actually making my first post a selfish one. Sorry about that.\n\nNevertheless, I'm a professional programmer (as in; I work as one) and enjoy programming as a craft. I've worked with everything from large-scale game development studios to small-scale consulting firms and the thing that annoys me is that I've completely stopped doing any kind of hobby development. This saddens me. I truly enjoy coding, but I seem to be lacking the inspiration lately (this has been going on for a year or two now).\n\nInspired by the awesome and intelligent posts here on proggit, I decided to try and ask for help. I'd like to start coding on my spare time again, fighting the good fight.\n\nCan you help me? What I'd like is either personal experiences regarding loss of inspiration (and hopefully how you overcame it) or actual tips on projects that I could start contributing to small-scale. I know this post makes me sound like a lazy douche but I'd really appreciate some help with this. Do you know of (or even manage!) a GitHub/othersocialcodingnetwork project that could use an extra hand, please let me know!\n\nLanguage, platform or technology are not really barriers but lately I seem to be enjoying work in C++, C# (.NET or Mono), Java or web stuff.", "summary": "I haven't been coding on my spare time for a few years now and miss it. Please help me get back into the groove by sharing helpful inspirational mantras or directing me to projects that I could start contributing small-scale to."}
{"id": "t3_1m5hkq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[M20] upset because I didn't say sorry when I [F20] was late", "post": "So we're both college students, studying at our respective locations. He's studying at school and I at a coffee shop. I offered to pick him up at around 8 when the library closes so then he doesn't have to walk  home.\n\nI end up taking ~20 minutes to get to school due to traffic, etc. He's been waiting in the cold for 20 minutes. Then he gets in the car. He asks, \"was traffic bad or something?\" and I reply with \"yeah, there were cars on the --\" blah blah, proceed to explain the situation of traffic. He then stays in a bad mood the rest of the car ride, not talking, then instead of studying together like we were supposed to I just ended up dropping him off because he was in such a crappy mood.\n\nPretty much he was mad at me because I didn't say \"sorry\" for making him wait in the cold for 20 minutes while I was picking him up. I however didn't feel the need to say sorry because I came as fast as I can, taking however long it was because of many cars on the busy street near our school. Plus I was doing him a favor by going out of my way to pick him up. Am I wrong and illogical for not saying sorry? He claims it's common sense to do that, \"Because saying sorry if youre late and caused someone to stand in the cold is common sense\". Because I still made him wait in the cold by taking a while. Or is he overreacting? I'm new to relationships so I don't know what to do :(", "summary": "offered to drive bf home. ended up being late and made him wait in the cold for 20 minutes. didn't say sorry - he got mad because its common sense to do so in such a situation. am i wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_2dk6dr", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Help Me Choose a Destination! (TLDR included)", "post": "Hey guys and gals I'm planning a trip and wanted to hear some suggestions and input from you all. I will describe myself and what I am looking for based on my research as well as I can.\n\nMyself:\n\nI am a 23 y/o white male living in Atlanta and from Florida originally. My previous trips out of the country have all been to either Europe or the Caribbean and while I enjoyed them I am looking for something different this time. I really like the outdoors, wildlife, and thrill seeking. I used to swim and love all forms of water, but also enjoy a good mountain or rain forest. I took a couple years of spanish and could get to a passable level if necessary. I have a lot of vacation days to use before the end of the year and right now am planning on taking two weeks off for this trip.\n\nWhat I am looking for:\n\nThe above section applies to this one as well but I will try to go more in depth here. The best way I have found to describe what I'm looking for is an adventure. I haven't done well in pinning specific activities to how I want this trip to make me feel, which is why I'm asking you wonderful people, but I want to feel any or all of these: awestruck, humbled, risky, unconstrained, unfamiliar. I would like to go some place where I can see/experience a good variety of things and places during my trip, which means I wouldn't stay in one place for more than a couple days. I would prefer to avoid extra flights once there, but if it would open up a lot of opportunities I would consider one halfway through. I think that optimally I would rent a motorcycle or something (and drive a few hours every couple days)as this would fulfill several of my interests(variety of places, unconstrained, (slightly) risky, adventure). \n\nSummary /", "summary": "young guy wants to go on a two week foreign adventure to see/experience as many different awe-inspiring landscapes, thrill seeking activities, and cultures as possible."}
{"id": "t3_2ih8o5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24 M] likes my roommates' ex-FWB [21 F] should I facebook her?", "post": "So my roommate used to have this FWB from Tinder, every time we hung out together we got along great. They broke it off cause she wanted something more serious.\n\nMy dilemma: No smartphone means no Tinder for me, I never got her number, but I was able to find her thru facebook. Problem is, my facebook is a ghost town - I never use it. Like \"I have 2 friends on there\" use it. Do I send her a nice 'we should hang out' message, or is that bordering on creepy?\n\nI'm more than a bit inexperienced when it comes to dating, I never got to figure out what was awkward and what wasn't when I was still in high school/community college, so here I am, trying to find out.", "summary": "Roommates ex FWB is cool, never got information from her while they were together, found her on Facebook, and want to know whether I should reach out that way even though my Facebook looks like a deserted ghost town."}
{"id": "t3_4uuvkn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How best can I [26M] contact an old friend [26F] of mine from high school", "post": "I'm about to move to a big city so naturally a lot of my friends from high school live there as they moved for work. In particular, there is this one girl who I noticed from Facebook is also there. I'd like to reach out to get in touch to at least have some friends in a new city, but I admit I wouldn't mind taking it further if the chemistry works out. In fact, I'm more interested to see if after several years this chemistry might be there, but if it isn't then at least I have a friend :)\n\nNow my problem is that I haven't spoken to her in the 8 years since high school (in all honesty I haven't kept up much with my high school friends). And back then we weren't particularly close friends, but we hung out with the same group of people. We weren't close not due to a lack of connection, but rather because I was close friends with different people than she was.\n\nWhat would be the best way to get in touch? I was thinking of just sending a message once I move to meet up for a drink to catch up as I'd like to make some friends in the new place, but I'm concerned that might be a bit questionable as I have plenty of friends in the city already so why would I be contacting her. Admittedly she can't know this, but because the city is so big and central it is highly unlikely I wouldn't have closer friends there already. Any help would be appreciated. I'm fine with her not caring about me and not wanting to meet up, I just want to make sure I get the tone of the message right.", "summary": "want to get in touch with high school friend to see if there is any chemistry, but bit unsure how to contact her."}
{"id": "t3_1enywg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Seeing my(24m) sort of sex fiancee(25f) for the weekend. Help me figure what to make of it?", "post": "So, long story short, i dated a girl for over 2 yrs, which resulted in an engagement. We were always deeply in love, and to this day we maintain it was something special, and the best relationship weve ever had. However, When my ex's visa ran out, and she returned to her home country(was supposed to be temporary), things started to fall apart. She was adapting to a new life, and i, with starting law school. \n\nHowever, i went to see her over winter break, and it was an incredible time, and we resolved to make things work, but once i left, we fell into the same routine, and parted ways in january. Through out this time, we have kept in contact daily, and have basically acted as we always have, with occasional arguments here and there, and her maintaining she is too afraid of the distance, which to me is just an obstacle. I went through a period where i didnt want to talk any longer, but she always talked me out of it, and when i recently agreed to keep talking, to let things \"flow naturally\" as she said, all of a sudden we werent talking that much. However, she is coming to visit her mother, and begged me to come visit her whe she does, so i purchased a ticket to see her. She seems kind of apprehensive now, and says maybe we should talk in the week before we see each other(i go next weekend), and that shes hoping to figure things out once and for all. \n\nWhat am i walking into when i get off the plane? throughout this time she has refused to remove our relationship status off fb, and hasnt even told much of her family that we split, but has been giving me an attitude and now seems apprehensive lately.", "summary": "seeing my foreign ex-fiancee next weekend, and need help to figure what to make of it. does she still want us?"}
{"id": "t3_47t6qs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriiend [17 F] of 1 year, I realized I've become very manipulative, controlling, and jealous, how do I fix this?", "post": "Hello everyone\n\nI ( 18M ) have become to realize that I am an extremely manipulative, controlling, and jealous boyfriend to my girlfriend ( 17 F ). Things were going great until just recently, about 2 months ago, when for some reason I would just get extremely angry, jealous, irritated for little to no reason.\n\nFor example, we're both track and field runners ( we go to the same high school ). This is her first year of track and she decided to join the distance running team based off my recommendations ( I'm a distance runner, and she really enjoyed her first year of cross country ) But now she has decided to try pole vault, and for some reason, this is making me unreasonably mad and extremely jealous of the fact that that means she'll be spending time with 3 other males training, although she has 2 other girls with her. I have no idea what is wrong with me..\n\nI realize that I am being irrational and I beat myself up mentally for it, and tell myself I won't do it again, but then it just happens again, and the same cycle begins. \n\nI am leaving for college and will be ~2 hours away from home in a few months while she finishes her last year of high school ( She's a junior, I'm a senior ). My theory is I just want her for myself for the remaining 5-6 months before I leave because I doubt I'd be seeing her much more than once every other week\n   \nYes, I have talked to her about this and she told me she has noticed my behavior changing and told me that I might just be having another bout with depression and anxiety, both of which I've had before. She honestly is the best and told me that \"We'd take it one day at a time and get over it together\". I want to know what I can do on my side to make this easier for her and myself.", "summary": "I've turned into a irrational, jealous, angry boyfriend and I'm aware of it, how do I go about fixing this?"}
{"id": "t3_10lwbh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17/M] am starting to \"disconnect\" from parents [54/M] [49/F]", "post": "It just started happening today. Dad (strict) [54] picked me up for something optional at school which I didn't want to go to, exited the car and started walking home, he pulls on my shirt to get me back and I just keep going, tells me I'm walking home and I say \"good\". Mom is starting to really get on my nerves for some reason despite the fact that she is usually leaves for work at 500 and returns after 20:30. Starting to get moody. I'm not sure if normal part of puberty or not. Any ideas of what it is and how I can fix it?", "summary": "Starting to \"disconnect\" from mom and dad and starting to get moody. Not sure if normal or not. Any ideas of what it is?"}
{"id": "t3_2u9xn9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[27 M] and alone my entire life. What now?", "post": "I like myself, which is good, since I spend most of my time alone. But when I don't want to be alone, I'm out of luck. My few relationships have been out of circumstance.\n\nI just want one friend (or better, a girlfriend, but maybe I'm getting ahead of myself). If you can't tell, I dread going to social events since they just seem like a whole lot of noise. But I feel like I'm not going to find anyone else like me, especially one who's also fond of me.\n\nFew people here do anything but go to bars, and the few clubs/meets I have found I am completely uninterested in. I don't like sports, and though I guess I'm nerdy myself, I dislike nerd \"culture.\" I'm back in school full-time, but not to socialize (maybe I should try to take a \"lighter\" class or two?). I tried online dating--let's just say I've never seen someone do worse. \n\nIs \"be someone else\" my only option here? I've tried it, but I also found it very unsatisfying.", "summary": "I prefer being alone most of the time, but when I want companionship I don't know what to do. How can I find someone like me?"}
{"id": "t3_4mgqgk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27F] refuse to let my boyfriend's [30M] mom [60'sF] clean the kitchen and they think I'm being rude.", "post": "My boyfriend's mom is visiting for three weeks from quite a distance away. His mom and I have a decent but minimal relationship. I don't see her often, and she's a little hard to connect with, but in all we've never had any problems. I'm closer to his dad.\n\nIn general, I think that cleaning other people's kitchens is not a good idea. There's too much of a risk that you may misplace or break something, so it's best to just leave it up to the host. This doesn't mean I never offer to do the dishes, but if they say no, I don't push it.\n\nCooking is my hobby. My kitchen is not stocked with your standard Teflon pans and plastic pastry brush pushed into the back of some drawer from disuse. I have handmade, antique, and expensive tools that require special care, and I've learned from experience that I can never trust anyone else to even wash the dishes due to the special care some things need. You wouldn't offer to clean someone's hobby carpentry shop, and I don't want people messing with my hobby kitchen.\n\nThat, and I don't think guests should have to do any chores at all. Not in my house at least.\n\nMy boyfriend's mom sees it differently. She wants to help and keeps insisting on cleaning the kitchen. My boyfriend thinks I should at least let her do the dishes so she feels like she's contributing, but I would likely just have to do it over again. They think I'm being rude by not letting her feel like she has a place to be \"mom\" in the kitchen. My boyfriend thinks I could teach her how to clean, but I can imagine that feeling very condescending to her and being overwhelming and testing for both of us.\n\nAm I wrong to be so protective of my kitchen?", "summary": "Boyfriend's mom wants to clean my kitchen, but I don't want her to because she would break, damage or misplace something. They think I'm being rude. Am I?"}
{"id": "t3_2aer4s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Pursuing a friendship then more.", "post": "I'm a 19 yr old male. I really like this girl(18 yr). I met her through a friend and have a hungout with her a couple times. We get along well and have similar personalities.  The main contact I have is through social media: twitter, snapchat and text. Our conversations usually don't last long except one occasion when we discussed a serious topic of depression and shared how we've had our moments. So we connected on another level (so I thought). Anyway the question is how can I pursue a friendship then more if she won't talk to me much. Is she ignoring me or just a busy person? I feel like we could have something if we tried.", "summary": "How can I pursue a friendship and more if she won't talk to me very long. Is she ignoring me or just busy?"}
{"id": "t3_37vfx0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [M37] son [M17] just told me that he's in love with my fiance [F29].", "post": "Yesterday my son brought me into his room so that we could talk. I was somewhat worried, everything's pretty relaxed in our household, not much you can't say in the lounge room. He sat me down and said that he's in love with my fiance. He said he was sorry and that he didn't mean for it to happen. He was on the verge of tears and I didn't really know what to say, so I just sat down next to him and gave him a pat on the back and said that it was alright.\n\nMy fiance and I have been together for 2 and a half years now. She moved in 6 months ago after we got engaged. Since then she's been trying to do things with my son so that she could feel more like part of the family. I'm guessing some wires got crossed.\n\nDo I just leave it at that? Should I tell my fiance so she can comfort him? I don't really know what else to do. I haven't seen him this upset since he was a kid. I would feel wrong just leaving it at that, but I have no idea what else to say or do.", "summary": "My [M37] son [M17] just told me that he's in love with my fiance [F29]."}
{"id": "t3_1amm6x", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Hello /r/pets, please help me with a poop problem!", "post": "Sorry for the lack of better title... >.> and I hope this is the right section for these sort of concerns.\n\nI've always wanted a dog or cat, and I would discuss all kinds of pet related subjects with both pet owning and non-pet owning friends. One day a friend says \"dogs/cats obviously can't use toilet paper after they do their business, right? So imagine, anything they sit on... Floor, couch, bed, your shirt.... Isn't that gross...??? I agreed, it is a bit gross. It caused my mind to conjure chain events that made me shudder and slightly reconsider the idea of owning a dog/cat. I don't know much about dogs/cats so I am not even sure if there is merit to what he said. I don't know how common these ideas are but I would like to read how people feel about this topic!", "summary": "Dogs/cats can't clean their butts and it's making me worried about how that will affect other objects in my life. Please tell me what you feel about it!"}
{"id": "t3_2yc3sk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [23 F] of 4 months, I lied to her", "post": "I lied to my girlfriend about going to a party and she is very hurt about it. I didnt do anyhting at the party or anything but we had been fighting that day because i went to an event earlier that day that my ex showed up to. I did not invite my girlfriend to the event and she obviously felt bad and she felt like i was excluding her from a family event but the only reason i didnt invite her was because I didnt even know about till last minute. Now that situation has been resolved as I have made it clear to my ex that she repulses me in every way. But yes I did lie and I feel like an asshole. She asked me about it yesterday and I came clean, needless to say she was furious and I understand but I never meant any harm by it. I lie, a lot, to get me out of sticky situations, I try to not lie to her about anything but this one time that I did I feel so guilty I just want her to be happy but I feel like Im always letting her down. What can I do to fix this?", "summary": "Lied to my girlfriend and she found out. How do I apologize genuinely and how do I start gaining her trust again?"}
{"id": "t3_4t7cjy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30F] in love with my [27M] gay friend. Should I spoil friendship and disclose feelings?", "post": "Let me keep this succinct and sweet. Perhaps best with bullet points\n\n- me and said friend work in the same lab (both graduate students doing short-term projects, I'm affiliated with the university, he's a visiting student)\n- became interested in him because, as per his body language, he seemed interested in me (and he is pretty much my type physically speaking)\n- didn't realize he was gay until I finally struck up a conversation with him (he appears very hetero in terms of almost everything) and he made it abundantly clear (didn't make it abundantly clear because I expressed interest but just in context of our conversations)\n- got to know him A LOT better (spending more time together than before) and realized he's even my type, personality-wise\n- he seems to like me a lot back but only as a friend\n- he leaves for Germany at the end of this coming week\n- I want to tell him how I really feel but I'm afraid this will not only spoil our friendship, but he'll think I've only been hanging out with him because of my feelings for him (and ergo, spoil friendship)", "summary": "30 y/o female in love with her 27 y/o gay male friend who is leaving for Germany in a week. Should I disclose feelings or not?"}
{"id": "t3_1hj836", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How long is too long?", "post": "I (26m) am dating a (31f). We've been seeing each other for about two months now. It's clear, at least to me that we like one another and I've told her I want to move on to the next level and be in a relationship with her. Shw tells me that she's still not sure. One reason being that she wants a man who's ready to settle and succesful etc etc. I tell her that i understand and that for me its only a matter of time before i get to that part of life. We act like a couple. Do things couples do. Yet we arent an official couple...just exclusively dating. Im beginning to feel that this may be a wild goose chase. What are your thoughts? What would you do?", "summary": "been dating this woman for 2 months now and she keeps telling me she's not sure where she wants to go with this? How long is too long?"}
{"id": "t3_2ef2pq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (17 F) \"broke up\" with my fwb (17 m) and it broke my heart.", "post": "Yes, I managed to break my own heart. When I was in,a committed relationship (lasted 13 months) somewhere along the lines we agreed to be friends with benefits if we broke up. We waited about a month before we did anything though. No, I wasn't completely over him at the time we started this but about 2 months in I was. I only saw him as a friend and fuck buddy. \n\nHe told me twice, on 2 separate occasions that he liked me and was thinking about getting back together. The first time, I said no. The more recent time, I told him I was  down if he was. But we both needed time to think so its been about 3 weeks- 1 month and nothing.\n\nso last night, I slept at his place and we had sex. I had never slept with him before and when we cuddled, I got mad butterflies and it scared me, so today I called everything off. He decided it was time to move on.\n\nI'm sad cuz I didn't actually explain to him why I didn't want to have sex anymore... And I also haven't told anybody that we've been having sex still. (its been about 7 months since we broke up).\n\nI just needed a vent and maybe some advice on what to do.", "summary": "Broke things off with my fwb (who is also my ex) but we both had crushes on each other. Also haven't told friends or family we've been seeing each other."}
{"id": "t3_nrtau", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just got peed on...what do I do?", "post": "So this might top the list of questions I never thought I'd have to ask, haha.\n\nBackground: Derpina and I have been friends for a year or so, met at a mutual job but only worked together a few months, still see each other every other week or so, more in the last 2 weeks, becoming increasingly interested in her, and it appears to be reciprocal.\n\nLast night (Christmas), we're out drinking like elves, she tells me that she just found out her family has to put her dog down, so I decide to be quite supportive and we have a good night at the pub. She tells me she doesn't want to sleep at home with all her dog's stuff that night, so I offer her my place of course. I offer to sleep on the couch, she insists we cuddle up instead, I'm down. Knowing full well how wrong it would be to take advantage of the alcohol and grief situation, we spoon up and fall asleep. \n\nA few hours later? Warmth. WTF Is that? Reach down...oh shit, she's passed out, and pissing the bed. A lot. I get up, leave her be, change my pants, and sleep on the couch. Get up this morning and she's mortified. I tell her it's no big deal (It isn't, this is why washing machines exist, and I've done plenty of drunk embarrassing shit so I can't judge) and she doesn't say 10 words to me.\n\nSo yeah...what do?", "summary": "Had a ladyfriend over, she pisses the bed, and me, unsure about how to handle this and still have a good relationship, she's mortified and walled off."}
{"id": "t3_1f8rko", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Credit card fraud follow up -- worth pursuing?", "post": "A little over a month ago I had a pending ~$700 charge on my visa from a cell phone company I do not use.  Talked to my CC company and they said nothing they can do until it either posts or goes away.  A week later, the charge finally disappears --- I decided to cancel the account anyway just in case.  No harm done.\n\nFlash forward to today - received a voicemail from a computer company I've never purchased anything from asking if I would like to reorder my attempted order from April (which evidently did not go through because of a 'credit card issue').  Clearly another charge that isn't mine which probably came right as I canceled my original card, or there abouts. \n\nBut they left a reference number for the order in the voicemail so I figured I would follow up.  I wound up getting all the info off of the account -- it included my name, home billing address, phone number and my (now canceled) credit card info.  It also included a shipping address (which is presumably the home address of the fraudster) on the other side of the US.\n\nSo now I have this info but I have no idea what I can/should do with it.  My bank doesn't seem to be that interested because no charge was ever made on my account (though they said even if one was it probably wouldn't change anything) and I live in a huge city far, far away from where the person possibly lives so I doubt getting in touch with my local PD would matter or if they would even care (and like I said, not even sure a crime was committed -- though someone clearly intended to at least try).\n\nAny thoughts?  I have no interest in \"tracking the person down\" or anything like that though would like to try to make sure they can't keep getting away with this.  Or is it a lost cause and just be happy it didn't cause me more hassle than canceling my account?\n\nThoughts?", "summary": "people attempted to steal my credit card info but none of the charges went through.  I have their shipping address but not sure if any authority cares or who, if anyone, to present the info to."}
{"id": "t3_2h1uki", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I have $10,000. Should I invest in solar panels or pay off some of my student loan.", "post": "I recently moved into a new house. From the sale of my old house, I will receive about $10,000 that didn't go into the down payment of the new house. I originally planned on putting that towards my student loan but I am now looking at using it towards solar panels for my house. Financing on the solar panels (about 16k) is 6.5% while my two loans (16,000k at 3.5% variable rate and 19.5k at 4.75%). I plan to stay in this house 10 years so if I were to wait a few years to get solar, then I wouldn't recoup the cost of putting it in. I live in a very sunny area and my normal electricity bill is about $150 a month on average but I'm very frugal with electricity. \n\nFrom how I'm planning it, I will use my tax refund over the next 3 years to pay off the remaining student loans so it's really more of a timing issue. I hate the idea of student loans and don't like being in debt but I also want to get the most of out my house. Student loan payments are about $350 a month if that helps.", "summary": "Have $10,000. Should I put it towards the investment of solar or pay off a portion of my student loans?"}
{"id": "t3_16183d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25F] am considering an open relationship with my boyfriend [30] of 3 years. Is this a bad idea or could this work?", "post": "It's a very long story so I'll try to summarize and provide details when asked. We have lived together since almost the start of our relationship and have always been extremely close. One of our issues has always been sexual needs. We split up a couple of days ago over this because he met someone at work who he immediately wanted to fuck their brains out and felt guilty and like it wasn't fair to me.\n\nI explained to him tonight that every human in a relationship has these feelings at one time or another (correct me if I'm wrong). I too have wanted to fuck other people before but have never considered ending the relationship because of it. I feel like it's important these things remain sexual-only and no emotions involved which he has already stated would be the case with the current girl in question.\n\nHe also didn't have many other sexual partners before me so it's definitely coming into play. This situation is also something I have considered in the past without him (being polyamorous/non- monogamous-not sure?) We have also discussed threesomes and such before.\n\nThe reason none of it has come to fruition before now is because of my own insecurities with my body. I'm trying to reach the point now of knowing its my only body and working it. I'm in the process of losing 30 lbs and have lost weight since we started dating. My weight has always been a strain on my sexual confidence especially in bed with him. \n\nSo on one hand I feel mostly okay with letting him fuck other women (and me fucking other men when I find someone appropriate) but I don't want to be jealous. I have thought all of this out without getting emotional at all so it's all with a clear head. I want to have our amazing and awesome relationship as partners and still be open to other things. I also don't want to be completely neglected by him and find a balance of healthy sex and also occasional sex with others. Is this possible? \n\nIs this appropriate? Would I be better off posting this to r/polyamory or  something?", "summary": "A relationship in which we can fuck other people is something I have always been interested in but I'm afraid of my own insecurity getting in the way. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_4fh8jm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22F] miss my friend [19F, would be 23F] and want to know where she is buried.", "post": "Hi, pretty much just what the title says. I had a friend in high school who took her life at 19 four years ago; without going into detail I miss her a lot and just want to visit her before I move across the country in a year. \n\nI looked up to her so much and her mental fortitude and perseverance gave me the strength to push myself through some of the hardest times in my life. She was my hero, but she never even knew. \n\nI only went to her wake, as the funeral service was family-only-- so I do not know anything about the funeral itself.\n\nI tried calling the foreman of cemeteries in the town that she passed away in, but he said he had no record of someone with her name being buried there. Should I try other towns nearby? Or is it possible this means she was cremated?\n\nI only met her family once or twice, and would feel inappropriate asking. Although they do have Facebook, so if I needed to reach out to them for any information it would be possible--just unsure how to go about doing so. Any advice would be extremely appreciated.\n\nJust want to see my friend again.", "summary": "Friend passed away unexpectedly, want to know if there is any way I can find her grave and say goodbye. I am moving far away in a year so this is very important to me."}
{"id": "t3_2jjt6m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22/F] boyfriend [23/M] makes fart noises with his mouth to mock/try to silence me whenever we're having an argument. Is this abusive?", "post": "It's 'funny', but at the same time it feels like as close as you can get to a physical attack without actually attacking someone. Like, worse than cuss words. It's done mockingly and seems intended to humiliate me. We'll be arguing and then when he gets sick of hearing it he does this noise over any of my words from then on out. I don't know, is this abusive behavior?\n\ncan I get serious replies only please", "summary": "my (22/f) boyfriend (23/m) of 3 years mocks me with farting noises when we're arguing and it's actually really annoying and feels abusive"}
{"id": "t3_4f146v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to tell someone you aren't interested in them when they're being friendly-flirty?", "post": "I (f21) have a new job (part time, been there 2 weeks) and I really like it. \n\nOne of the guys(m24) at my work friend requested me on Facebook and I accepted it. He messaged me and it was pretty casual. just getting to know you type stuff. He said I have a great smile & I just replied with a smile emoji & changed the subject. Then he said we should hang out sometime and I said \"I'm down\". He also expressed how I'm extra nice to him & he usually doesn't get that from coworkers because he's an introvert. \n\nI know it doesn't sound like much but I'm really not interested in anything more than a friendship with this person. I don't want to be a tease which is what I'm most worried about, him thinking I'm interested.\n\nI don't know when I should tell him I'm not looking for anything right now or if I should at all. I don't want to be *that* girl who tells a guy she's not interested when he isn't either. I really wanted an outsiders view because I'm kind of going cazy in my mind, thanks", "summary": "my new coworker showed signs he's interested in me (that's how it feels) and I wanted advice on how to keep it a friendship & friendship only"}
{"id": "t3_3qf0sn", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Am I breaking the law by helping my mother hide her savings from the bank?", "post": "**Background:**\n\nI'm a student in Ireland. I live away from home and keep two separate bank accounts. I don't really use my second account. My parents have just recently made a deal with the bank (to clear their debt if they sell the properties they own). As part of the deal, they get to move to an older home that needs a lot of work. Obviously they need money to do this house up, but the bank watches their accounts very carefully.\n\nMy mom asked me if she could keep \u20ac12,000 in my bank account (\u20ac3,000 at first and then another \u20ac9,000) so that the bank doesn't know about it and take it off them. I said yes because I know they're really stressed about all this and I wanted to help in any way I could. I was kind of worried that I might get in trouble for it, but decided to trust her. She's asked me to take the money out in lots of \u20ac500 euro multiple times a week, so that she can pay the guys who are working on the house.\n\nI know this all sounds very dodgy, but I'm certain this money hasn't come from drugs, robberies, etc. I know that my mom used my name/Personal Public Service Number to pay \"me\" for \"hours that I worked\" in their shop, so I think that's probably where the money came from (probably not much better in the eyes of the law).\nAm I at risk of getting in trouble here? I don't really know anything about finance, or what's actually going on. I really want to help my parents, but at the same time I have to protect myself too.", "summary": "Mom has \u20ac12,000 in my bank account. She wants me to withdraw it in small amounts so the bank don't notice. Can I get in trouble for this?"}
{"id": "t3_2rnls5", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by rejecting an offer to trade a car for a \"The Who\" album", "post": "This was actually in 1986.  Ancient history.   Anyway, I was browsing a thrift store and came across a beat up vinyl copy of \"The Who:  Live at Leeds\".   It looked like a generic album cover, and inside it were a few pictures of the band, a rejection letter from EMI, and, to my shock, a copy of their contract to play at Woodstock!\n\nMother Lode!\n\nI quietly paid fifty cents and contemplated my newly found riches!   This thing must be worth thousands, I thought!\n\nThe fuck up is that I showed the album to a die-hard fan and she immediately offered her car for the album.   It was maybe a $2,000 car.  I knew better and rejected the trade.\n\nI held on to the album for twelve more years, figuring it would only go up in value.   In 1998 I emailed a record dealer about my treasure and eagerly awaited his multi-thousand dollar offer...\n\n\"All the albums came like that.  Sorry.\"\n\nA further gut punch is that there were actually items missing from the album, making it just about worthless.", "summary": "Bought a cheap record at thrift store.  Thought it was rare and valuable.  Rejected offer of a car for it.  Later found out it was worthless."}
{"id": "t3_30t7qr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] of 6 month..she kinda broke up with me on saturday after a small fight", "post": "So on saturday my girlfriend came over to sleep at my place, she got everything with her and i did not think everything was bad at all. We got a fight on friday evening and didnt talked much the first minutes she was with me, after some time passed she started crying and said she wants so leave..\n\nI started asking what that means and she wasnt really sure, she said i constrict her freedome and shes not sure if she is feeling 'it' anymore. Honestly i cant believe her, we were together the whole last weekend and had sex for the first time. On Thursday i was at her place and everthing was fine, we had dinner together and everything was just as it always was.\n\nYesterday, on sunday,  she asked me over the phone how i am, and we both talked about how we are feeling and whats different in our relationship compared to relationships our friends have, everything seems to be normal. Just the normal talk we have after we had a argument. \n\nI dont know how to interpret this whole situation, its the first relationship for both of us, if she really wants to break up with me, dont you plan on do it and not come with all your sleepover things and contact the person the next day. Im not sure what i should do at the moment, im still in love and for me it seems as she loves me too..", "summary": "GF kinda broke up with me although in the week before everything was fine. A day after the 'break up' she contacts me and we talk again. I dont know what to do and how to interpret this whole thing."}
{"id": "t3_19zy9i", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "She's a foodie, I'm a frugal eater.  Is this new relationship bound to fail?", "post": "Ages: 25 male, 24 female\n\nThings are going well.  Although we are not \"official\"/boyfriend and girlfriend, we have spent a lot of time together in the last two weeks. Good connection, great sex, we like each other, and I'm pretty sure we're exclusive at this point (official talk about that coming soon), because we've spent every night together...if she's still dating around, they must be 20 minute afternoon dates, or something!  Either way:\n\nShe's a foodie; she loves to try new restaurants (often pricey ones), knows *a lot* about different types, styles, ethnicities.  She likes exotic and new things in terms of food and frankly, it makes me feel dumb talking to her about food because she knows so much.\n\nI'm a frugal eater.  I cook a rice/beans/veggie combo that I put in the fridge and it lasts me for dinner all week.  I don't really care about trying new, expensive things every week; as long as I'm eating healthy, I want to spend as little on food as possible.  I just don't care about it.\n\nNow, a few weeks in, it's making me uncomfortable going to restaurants and paying a bunch of money.  I don't even enjoy the meal; all I think about is \"wow, I could be saving this 30 dollars but instead I'm spending it on an exquisite meal I don't want.\"\n\nI really want to keep spending time with this girl, but I don't want to eat out anymore, or spend money on food.  I don't mind treating her every now and then, but I feel like she'd quickly grow bored with my eating habits.\n\nDoes this sound like an irrelevant issue that can be easily worked out? Or is this going to cause problems again and again?  If so, should I get out now before spending more time and money?", "summary": "new girl I'm seeing loves to experience bizarre, new, often pricey foods.  I prefer to eat at home for as little money as possible.  Deal-breaker, or can this work?"}
{"id": "t3_4urxhb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my one night stand [28M] It's been four years and I can't stop thinking about him", "post": "I'm a normal, friendly person with solid social skills, but I'm also a late bloomer sexually. I had sex for the first time four years ago with \"Ben\", a guy I was friendly with and had a crush on. We hooked up and it was great, but then he immediately started ignoring me and we never really spoke again. It was really irritating at the time but I wasn't heartbroken by any stretch of the imagination. \n\nFlash forward four years. I haven't had any sexual or romantic relationships since Ben. Then about eight months ago, Ben randomly liked my new profile picture. Ever since then I've been thinking about him a lot and I'm really not sure why. I haven't messaged him or even looked at his profile, but I have this little fantasy where I run into him in my new town and he asks me to meet him for dinner. \n\nI'm posting here because I'm super confused about why I'm so fixated on the idea of this guy who treated me pretty disrespectfully, and who I never really had any emotional attachment to.", "summary": "Four years ago I hooked up with an acquaintance, never heard from him again, and suddenly I'm obsessing over him."}
{"id": "t3_49pwih", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (29m) girlfriend (28f) of 2.5 years has been unemployed for 6 months and it's starting to get to us both.", "post": "She lost her job six months ago through no fault of her own (lay-offs) and even though she has been looking nonstop for one, going on interviews, etc, the hiring process in our city is harsh and there are over 600 applicants for even menial jobs. \n\nI don't know what to do. I don't make a lot (34kish) and I'm paying for everything for us. She handles the budget and food shopping and all of that and she cooks and cleans and does what she can (not all of the cooking/cleaning but most of it) alongside looking for work. \n\nBut there's so much stress and frustration on us both now and I don't know what to do to really help it for either of us. She cries a lot because she doesn't like mooching off me and because she's bored and feels useless (she's not interested in volunteering either, and I don't blame her, it's unpaid labor), and we don't have a lot of chances to have a lot of fun since everything fun pretty much costs money.\n\nWhat can we do? Life's so fucking hard.", "summary": "GF and I are stressed out of our minds because she's unemployed and having the worst time trying to find a job, we're both suffering for it and I don't know what to do. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_2q1hk7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What happened?", "post": "I'm 28m and she's 22F. We have been married for 5 years.\nOk, here is some background.  This morning I'm being super sweet and holding her and loving on her in bed. We get up and I get the kids fed and she takes off with the baby to see our great grandmother.  Well that night we are cuddling on the sofa watching movies and we head to bed. \n\nI come in a bit later after saying good night to my niece. I come in and cuddle up next to her and she is soaking wet... so I start to finger her and then I eat her out until she comes 3 or 4 times. ( hitting all the spots that drive her crazy)  She starts begging me to stop with full body convolutions. I roll over get up and wash up I come back. I'm thinking she's going to return the favor and she suddenly gets pissed at me. ( this is after I washed my face and hands) she just turns over and basically went to sleep.  What the fuck did I do wrong?", "summary": "great day with so. She came 3 or 4 times. She gets mad at me and will not tell me why."}
{"id": "t3_4fj7au", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not finishing my glass of wine", "post": "I woke up yesterday after a 16hr shift and a 5 hour alcohol binge to find my lights on, my shoes and clothes on, and my brothers macbook opened on my lap with red stains all over the keyboard.  I must've passed out with a glass of wine but it couldn't have been more than an ounce or two because there wasn't a drop on my clothes, on the couch, on the floor; it had all been absorbed by my brothers brand fucking new macbook pro.  \n\nspent all day yesterday recovering from my hangover and bringing his macbook around for repairs. thing won't turn on, the charger doesnt light up. macstore said they could replace all the internals for $750 but they wouldn't backup the data.  3rd party store said \"sure we'll do it for $125\" but called today to say it would actually be $350.  i just ordered an internal hard drive disk enclosure for ssd and a screwdriver so i could just take the ssd out and backup the files from the enclosure for a whopping $25 with next day air. lol $350 smd.", "summary": "this really sucks though, i don't have a laptop bc i cant afford it but now im replacing my brothers bc i passed out while listening to his itunes w a glass of wine in my hand"}
{"id": "t3_1nvid1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (18F) trying to find real friends. My ex-friends from elementary school threw away our 8 years of friendship, recently.", "post": "Me: Girl, 18, doesn't use girl logic, has some patience but won't take shit from people, would do anything for (now ex) friends.\n\nTravis: Guy, 18, was closest friend until he started ditching me for the high-school whore (sounds cliche, but just my luck) was okay with it for a couple of instances (friend-code) but, he would treat me like dirt for the longest. We're on okay terms now.\n\nJames: Guy, 18, was the more innocent of the group, very sweet, said he, \"cherished\" our friendship. I babied him to death, eventually he wanted to date (something I've wanted for a while, I loved this guy). Dated for a few weeks, everything was fine, started making out--he freaked out but wouldn't tell me why. Next day broke up with me because he couldn't get passed the, \"friend\" thing. Few days later he's drooling over 14 year old freshman. Tried to talk to him about it, he completely ignored me and wouldn't even talk to me even though he preached about how our friendship meant the world to him...\n\nLet me add that I was at their bedside whenever they got sick, or when they were crying their eyes out when a girl broke their heart.", "summary": "I would do anything for these two guys, they both swear they, \"cherished\" the friendship, really just lied, one guy ditched me for a 14 year old. "}
{"id": "t3_2elhfn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [19 M] \"in\" a class with this girl [19ish], but I may not be in the class in a week. What's the move here?", "post": "Long story short w/ regards to the class: I've been attending a class in the hopes of moving from the waiting list to being enrolled, but it's looking grim right now. And if I do get in, it would likely be a different time than I want.\n\nThe girl: It started off  with me asking for direction as to where I would get a supply for the class,  and I got her number right there. Great! We've texted a bit (nothing significant, maybe 40 between both), but we seemed to really hit it off Monday in class. I would have talked to her after class, but I had to talk to the prof about the wait list situation.\n\nAnyway, I'll go to the class Wednesday, but that may be the last time I'm in there and we don't have any other classes together, so how do I not let this die? Should I maybe text her tomorrow (Tuesday) and see if she wants to hang out (study, eat, whatever) or just wait until Wednesday to do something. If the move is to wait until Wednesday, what should that move be? I know I'm probably over-thinking this, but I'm not really up to here with girls, so any help would be cool.", "summary": "On wait list for class w/ girl in it that seems really great. Probably won't get into class, so how do I maintain a connection with her?"}
{"id": "t3_2u167t", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Can you stay friends with someone who you may be attracted to??", "post": "I have a friend of the opposite sex that Ive known for almost 10 years.  Full disclosure- we did hook up drunk, ONCE,  like 9 years ago.   And we kissed a few years ago when we were both single. And again, drinking.   Besides that we have stayed friends.  We only live 10 minutes apart, but because I have an SO and we know were both attracted to eachother, we dont hang out.  \n\nI have  been with SO for less than 2 years.  Is it wrong to want to keep my best friend, even though we are kind of attracted to eachother?    This is my absolute best friend that I tell everything to.  I have not/would not cheat on my SO.  I dont hide the friendship from my SO.  (And yes, SO knows that we hooked up once, and that kissed a few years ago.)\n\nI have heard people say its emotional cheating if you would rather talk to someone other than your SO.  Is this always true?   This friend understands my awkward social stuff, morbid and generally inappropriate sense of humor,  and reddit obsession. \n\nI dont think about the friend super sexually... but I do smile like an idiot when I think about them.  And we do talk every day.  More than either of us talk to anyone else.  Is this just a normal *grown up* way to feel about a best friend and Im worrying too much and being a weirdo because they are the opposite sex and society says thats bad??", "summary": "Growing up is weird.  Am I being a dirtbag if I like talking to my best friend  more than my SO?"}
{"id": "t3_3p2zoq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20/F] with my boyfriend [20 M] of 9 months I'm against his constant cocaine use and I fear nothing will stop it.", "post": "He told me last night that he used cocaine and I do not approve of that. However he said he wanted to continue to use it the rest of his life. I would be fine if it was an every now and then thing but the way he talks he sounds like he loves it enough to do it often. He used cocaine to try to forget about me lying to him at the beginning of the year...so it is my fault I feel. I am worried because his parents used cocaine and had many issues resulting in them dying from drugs. I love him and want to stay and help him even though he says he will continue no matter what. The other half of me says leave. I am just afraid he won't fight to keep me. I am afraid of hurting him so much he does something reckless... I am do lost what do I do?", "summary": "bf wants to snort cocaine but I won't have it. We live far away from each other and I don't know what to do. HELP"}
{"id": "t3_35r4gv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my [19 F] SO of 2 months, at a really strange point in our relationship and I badly need advice", "post": "I met my current SO about 2 months ago, we go to the same university, but come from different states. Things progressed fairly quickly; after a month she told me she loved me and began referring to herself as my girlfriend- this signaled to me that we were an \"official\" relationship. \n\nAnyways we both come from different states, and would be long-distance during our summer break- we'd both be back at school in mid-august. Before we left, she told me she didn't want to be in a long-distance relationship and that she didn't know if she would want to remain exclusive over the summer break. I saw this as essentially the end of our relationship and I told her that I would be moving on. \n\nThis is where things got complicated, as what I said seemed to really upset her. She asked why we couldn't \"just be friends and talk\" over summer then get back together in the fall, and I ignored her for a few days before I ended up breaking down and resuming contact with her. We are still talking and she has at times mentioned plans of what we'll do together when we come back to school, but I just don't know.\n\nWe aren't in an \"official\" relationship, but I feel as if I'm being used; she wants to be single over the summer, but wants me to hang around so we can get back together in the fall. I think this is unfair and I don't like the idea of us going from a relationship to being friends to back to a relationship whenever she wants. \n\nI do have very strong feelings for her, but I don't like the idea that she wants to be single while we're apart but then get back together if nobody better comes along.", "summary": "girlfriend of 2 months wants to \"be friends\" over the summer then get back to an official relationship when we return to school. I don't like this at all."}
{"id": "t3_1bq2t8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[m25] just went on a great date with a [f29]; afterwards during a phone conversation she gets weird, then tells me in a whisper that she hasn't been on birth control in 8 years. Why did she tell me that?", "post": "I [m25] met a great woman [f29] at my community college a few weeks ago. On Tuesday I found out she was single from a mutual friend and then I asked her out on Thursday. We went to a restaurant, had a great date with good conversation. As we were walking to our cars in the parking lot, she motioned for a hug. Two long hugs later and a denied kiss attempt, we parted ways but we made promises to see each other soon. We really hit it off!\n\nA few hours after the date we are texting late into the night. She calls me after a few texts and then we end up talking for about an hour and a half.\n\nOk, this is the issue or question I have. At one point in the conversation, she became kind of weird and started to speak really softly. I don't know how the topic came up (we were kind of talking around our attraction to each other and past sexual experience), but she whispered very softly to me that she hadn't been on birth control in 8 years. I told her that I appreciate her telling me that, but it was her choice to be on birth control. I think the way she told me implied that she was guilty about it.\n\nI know some women don't like being on birth control. It affects them in weird ways. I'm just confused why she felt the need to tell me that. Is a woman NOT being on birth control a weird thing and/or is it something a woman could feel guilty for?\nAnyway, I also told her that I ALWAYS use a condom. She seemed more relieved after that.", "summary": "Woman I just took out for a great date told me in a whispering, possibly guilty voice that she hasn't been on birth-control in over 8 years. Why did she feel the need to tell me this so soon?"}
{"id": "t3_3v11is", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] broke up with my girlfriend [24 F]of 2 years a few months ago with my girlfriend of 2 years. Now I'm second guessing my decision.", "post": "Back in September I broke up with my girlfriend of two years. We had a fight, but I told myself at the time that the breakup wasn't over the fight. I told myself that it was because of a bunch of little things I saw as \"wrong\" with the relationship. I told myself it was because she was messy, because she may have smoked (weed) and drank too much. This is all despite the fact that there was a lot right with the relationship, same interests, similar personalities, all the physical stuff was great. \n\nBut since then I've just been unhappy. I've dated a bit, but no one has really sparked my interest as much as she did. We've talked a little bit since then and she seems to be the same person she was before. I'm not really sure what to do, was I just blowing things out of proportion before (with the fight making everything seem worse)? Should I pursue her again (if she will even take me back)? Or am I just clinging to something that I think would make happy? Apologies for walls of text, if I've been unclear anywhere, just let me know and I will clarify any point.", "summary": "Broke up with girlfriend of two years, thought it was over legitimate reasons, still unhappy after several months of being single, should I pursue her again?"}
{"id": "t3_3am6cp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] boyfriend [22M] says weird things to me sometimes and I don't know what to think of it.", "post": "I've been with him for about six months and there have been a few times where he's said something borderline psychopathic to me. One time I couldn't stop laughing about something (kind of hysterical but I really couldn't help it) and he told me he'd hit me in the face if I didn't stop, he once told me he was going to tear my ass apart (what does that even mean?) and he said some other similar stuff a few times. \n\nI told him that I didn't find these kind of things funny and he told me they were just jokes and apologized, but then he'll just do it again. \n\nHe's otherwise very thoughtful, caring (bla bla), so I'm wondering if this is a big red flag or if I should just take it as misplaced humor?", "summary": "BF makes weird \"jokes\", I'm not sure if I should see it as a red flag or if it's just weird humor."}
{"id": "t3_1z3b1o", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Feeling down? Give this a thought", "post": "This thought came to me while I was watching the film Gravity. Now I won't spoil it for those of you who haven't watched it, but without giving anything important anyway, there is a scene where our protagonist, faced with almost certain doom, calms herself down by listening to random radio broadcasts coming from Earth. She can hear them, but they can't hear her. It's a nice scene because it reminds you that if you were faced with your own impending mortality, you would instantly miss the most mundane parts of life, and one of its most simple pleasures - the luxury of not having to worry about your own death.\n\nThis scene just made me realise - and you can trade out the protagonist's imprisonment in space for anything, such as a cancer diagnosis or life on death row - these people would trade anything just to get back the opportunity to wake up in the morning of a standard day where your biggest worry is getting to work on time, or finishing an essay for college. They would trade anything just to return back to a normal, boring, mundane reality.\n\n*THIS IS YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW, AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO TRADE IT FOR ANYTHING.* \n\nEven if you are poor, or ill, you have options. You can choose to read this post or you can close your internet browser and run outside and just taste the fresh air. You can learn something new, fall in love, or get blisteringly drunk. It sounds cliched but you'll never realise how much you would value these privileges unless you actually lost them. So if you are feeling down, or depressed, just remember that you are a tiny ant, crawling on a tiny pebble, in the infinite sandy beach that is our universe. You don't have to answer to anyone but yourself, no one is judging you from afar, and you are capable of whatever it is you want to do. If you fail, at least you can sit back, relax, and enjoy the fact you have the time to fail, fail, fail, and fail again. \n\nDon't treat every day as if it was your last, treat every day as if it were your first. Earth has a lot of surprises in store for you, and if you're seen everything and done everything, you still have the potential to change yourself.", "summary": "if a man was in a falling plane and the pilot managed to land it safely against all odds, that man would feel like he had received the greatest gift on earth. You have the exact same gift."}
{"id": "t3_1d4wj9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Cute girl(19) asks me(19) to go to comic con.", "post": "So I have known this girl for about a year and have seen her on a good amount of occasions. The first time I hung out with her alone(she was and still is single)was unintentional because I was expecting a group of friends, but none were able to come. She came regardless of me telling her it would just be me and her. It was an awkward moment for me because I didn't know what to do. So the night ended and she went home. She also said she enjoyed herself which I found hard to believe. Later in the week I asked her if I could make it up to her for the awkward night by making her dinner the following week. I decided to make everything from scratch. I felt some of the things I made weren't as good as I wanted. Once again she said she enjoyed herself. Fast forward a couple weeks and I decided to ask her if she felt the same way as me. She said she wasn't looking for anything at the moment. Although I was a little heartbroken I kept my composure, acted maturely, and just kind of brushed it off. We hung out later with no awkwardness. Fast forward to now where she asks me, my friend, and his girlfriend to go to comic con. Everybody I tell about this tell me it is a double date. I am horrible with reading women and I often misinterpret signals. I would just like some of your guys opinions if possible.", "summary": "girl I like says he enjoys my presence, but I am unsure if that indicates if she also has feelings for me."}
{"id": "t3_52mb8y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] have just come out of 8 year relationship. Feel like I don't know how to date/flirt. Scared will grow old with many cats. Any advice?", "post": "This is my first post so please be kind :)\n\nI know that lots of people often feel confused when they come out of a long-term relationship. They think they have forgotten how to be single, or how to flirt/date.\n\nI am one of these people.\n\nThe problem is, my relationship started when I had just turned 16. I have never been single - as an adult. That might sound silly. But the only time I have ever flirted or dated was as an over-confident, hormone-riddled teenager.\n\nNow I have a pretty demanding job, responsibilities blah blah... And I just don't know how to this!\n\nI'm no way in a rush to get into a new relationship, but that doesn't mean I want to be completely alone in the mean time.\n\nIf anyone has experienced anything similar, or just generally has some advice, it would be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "Started a long-term relationship as a teenager, ended as an adult. Now feel like I don't know how to date."}
{"id": "t3_1bzb0r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19m) want more from a FWB relationship with her (19f)", "post": "So, we met in August at the start of college. We were friends, best friends, then I told her I liked her. She wasn't into it, stayed friends. Then this year she told me she liked me, but then we talked about it and she is still not entirely over her ex from home. We hooked up once, then she said it was a mistake, we stopped for a while. Then over Easter we hooked up pretty much for 3 days straight. Since then we've been up and down over it. I want to go out with her, she doesn't want to go out with me (or anyone else, because she doesn't like the commitment). I asked about the future, she said 'maybe', but she likes how it is now apparently.\n\nSo, I really like her and want to go out with her, but don't think we should do the whole long distance relationship thing over Summer.  She still isn't completely over her ex from home, so she may end up having sex with him, which doesn't bother me too much, I told her she should do whatever she thinks she needs to, in order to help her decide about us. So my hopes right now are that she comes back next year and wants to go out, but for now we're friends with benefits, but it's pretty clear it's something more to me and she said that nothing would have happened if the person were anyone but myself, so you can take that however you see it. I'm not sure if we should keep going the way we're going or stop now.", "summary": "I want to go out with this girl, she isn't sure (about anything).  Should I continue FWB while waiting for her to decide whether she's sure?"}
{"id": "t3_1s31iz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my SO [21F] having problems communicating", "post": "Hello /r/relationships!\n\nMe and my SO for 3 months have been having a hard time expressing our feelings and it is kind of slowly breaking the relationship. \n\nSo a little background: I've been seeing this girl for almost 10 months now, however we didn't officially start dating until this September. \n\nWe click on a lot of levels and have a fantastic sex life.\n\nWe both had long-term relationships before this one that kind of messed us up too.\n\nMy question is, she will sometimes text me stuff like \"<3 <3 <3\" or \"thinking about you ;)\" and I never know how to respond.\n\nMy ex-girlfriend never did stuff like that and it feels weird to me text feelings like that. \n\nSo when I respond with \"ok :)\" or \":D <3\" she will get pretty upset and try to take back what she said because to her she feels like she is being rejected.\n\nHow can I make her understand that its not that I'm rejecting her, I just don't know what to do in that type of situation?\n\nThe L-word hasn't been said, but i've been hinting around it for a while and just waiting for the right time.\n\nI do think that I really do love this girl and want her for the long haul but I feel like this is just making it very hard\n\nAny advice will be greatly appreciated :)", "summary": "Girlfriend [21F] texts me stuff like \"<3 <3\" or \"thinking about you sexy :)\" and I [20M] don't know how to respond."}
{"id": "t3_2jwq0j", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "I am being gifted a car. Need some advice on how to best to handle it when it comes to taxes. (State of Washington). (x-post /r/taxes and /r/tax)", "post": "Story:\n\nMy dad's mom passed in July. He and his brother are to split her estate and all things included in it 50/50. They both agreed that I can have her 2009 Lexus RX350. I will receive it on Saturday. I plan to sell it at some point in the near future and combine the money from that sale and the money from the sale of my own vehicle to buy a newer vehicle.\n\nQuestions:\n\nPart 1: I read that Washington State has no gift tax on the amount that the value of the car would be. However, there is a federal gift tax on values of $14,001 or more. From what I have looked at, this vehicle has a value of $18,000 - $25,000 in my area.\n\nDoes this mean that I will have to pay taxes on the full value of the vehicle being given to me?\n\nPart 2: I am new to the state of Washington, and new to having sales tax. This means I have no idea how sales tax works when purchasing a used vehicle from a private seller. Would it perhaps be more reasonable in terms of the amount of taxes I will have to pay for me to \"Purchase\" the vehicle from my father for the low low price of $10? Would this avoid the gift tax? I probably would still have to pay sales tax, but whatever the percentage is on $10 wont be much at all.\nIs this a good idea?", "summary": "Being gifted an expensive vehicle, is it better to let it be a gift and pay gift tax, or to \"purchase\" it for a very low amount and pay sales tax? Is that even allowed?"}
{"id": "t3_297rxn", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by browsing late at night", "post": "This happened about 20 minutes ago, I was sitting at my desktop at about 11:55. I had been browsing a few threads like \"most disturbing/creepy stories you have\" and after an hour of this i went to get some cereal as all late night browsers do, I quickly realized my mistake as the whole house was pitch black and I immediately started seeing scary shit like figures of people or other hallucinations. Let out a small scream and lost my footing while walking up the stairs and fell while smashing my face into a wooden staircase and spilling cereal everywhere. the only plus is that my staircase looks like a jizz waterfall.", "summary": "browsed fucked up shit, had a bitch fit while getting food, smashed my face up but made a jizz waterfall."}
{"id": "t3_p8gy5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Crazy ex? [NSFW]", "post": "Share your love/dating-stories of pure bullshitery. I'll start.\nOut on a date. After we've been to the movies, we hung out at a party, drank a little bit (I got a little tipsy, but she didn't). We go back to my place, and lay down on the couch. She's REALLY horny, and we start getting intimate. I start rubbing her tits and inner tighs, working my way down her pants, and undressing us. She climbs on top of me, and we start making out, still undressing.\nSuddenly, she flips the fuck out. She screams at me for not stopping her, and \"broke up\" with me, whatever relationship we ever had. We had an argument for about an hour, which she just kept telling me I was \"using her\". 10 minutes after she left, she told me not to take anything she said seriously. What the FUCK.\nShe apologized, and told me she still wanted us to be friends.", "summary": "ex climbed on top of me, and as I was about to put my dick in her, she flipped out, and told me I was using her. We NEVER spoke again."}
{"id": "t3_3gm2ma", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by talking to SO nervously after a rough day a good dinner.", "post": "This happened about 30 minutes ago, it's 12:39 am as I write this and it all started when I texted my B at ~8:30 I was really quite nervous, I waited for her to text back while I was in bed trying to catch some Z's listening to some Redbone when I hear some rap music playing, some random guy was walking down the street with music blasting, that was pretty weird. FF to ~11:59 I couldn't keep waiting so I hoped back on my phone and looked at the message. I waited for a bit before reading old conversations and getting a lil emotional when suddenly... anxiety round house kicks me in the dick I have a panic attack and then I threw up all over myself. I proceeded to get into the bathroom with my jeans at my ankles, I made into the toilet and the seat was closed. I felt more coming up so I tried to open the seat as fast as I could but it was too late. I projectile vomited into the top of the seat while lifting it causing a rainbow of liquid pepperoni and cheese pizza all over the goddamn wall. it was pure filth. I finished shitting out of my mouth then cleaned my face up. it was all over my bed and on every surface of the toilet room. by the time I finished cleaning it up it was 12:30. To put a lil cherry on top I also have an English test of some sort tomorrow and I'm really fucken tired.", "summary": "Hopped into a lil difficult situation with SO, anxiety kicks my dick in and I threw up all over the walls n shit. the end."}
{"id": "t3_3f4ofq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by disobeying my parents", "post": "Alrighty. This was bad. TIFU by disobeying my parents. How, you ask? Well let's just say I am 16 almost 17 years old, and my parents are really strict with people coming over etc. But anyways, my cousin who I have known for since I was born, who is basically my brother, comes over. ( not the person who wasn't allowed to be here obviously lol) So I show him these 2 Asian girls, that I have known from school. He thinks they are cute etc, we ask them to come over later in the night for movies. (Obviously the intent was to try to get some if possible, but not bring it up and go with the flow) My parents are gone until very late partying, and they come over after we waited for like an hour and a half. We begin to watch movies and don't try anything that would ruin the night haha. We get 10 minutes into a movie and there is a knock at the door, which scares all of us shitless! My parents aren't at the door, I'm thinking is it the girls parent or brother or someone? Come to find out, it's my fucking cousin's mother. Coming over to check for the EXACT REASON that she thought we would have people over. My cousin tries to hide them in a closet, not thinking like we should, we could of easily led them out through the back door. Anyways, his mom enters, we try to play it off, and one of our Asian woman friends leaves her shoes on the floor! We notice and make gestures to each other like \"oh fuck oh fuck!\" Well guess what, my cousins mom checks the closet, finds the girls, and, yea. She says hi to them, they say hi back, she takes my cousin home. We try to tell her we had no intent on having sex, (LOL HAHAH) trying to get her to believe us. Anyways, she ends up believing us, and she doesn't tell my parents, after I finally talked her out of it. So Uhm, yea. Dodged a fucking gigantic bullet there. Still feel stupid I didn't lead them out the back door.", "summary": "Parents went out, said no one over, my cousin and I invite someone over, get caught. Cool cousin mom doesn't tell my parents yay, dodged a bullet!"}
{"id": "t3_3vf2tc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my older sister [22F] admitted something and younger siblings [18M/17F] birthday party is tomorrow", "post": "Was working on a paper and have 3 hours until I have to get up but I'm feeling a bit stressed out now. Question: I feel annoyed, almost disgusted at my older sister, what should I do?\n\nGot into bed and my older sister woke up (bunk bed) and she just admitted that she lost 3 wii remotes (2 belonged to family, 1 to my brother) months ago that she borrowed for a friend's party and never told anyone about it. \n\nI can't help but feel disappointed because my younger siblings came to talk to me right after they both got home from work last night to talk about their party (cleaning up, getting the wii remotes back). \n\nIgnoring our bedroom, the two livingooms are a mess because of all of her stuff (she sews and leaves everything everywhere). She just told me that she was stressed out from school/work/wii remotes/cleaning up/buying the cake for their birthday (offered to split with her). She told me how she gets 8 hours of sleep but is always so tired (can't stay up to work on stuff because she gets too tired and passes out in bed) \n\nI told her to tell them about the wii remotes because they deserve to know. \nI'm a bit annoyed because she told me she was just ranting, so I could have slept earlier... I feel disappointed. \n\nI'm so sorry that this is all over the place, trying to post on my phone.", "summary": "older sister lost wii remotes months ago and never told anyone, she's stressed out due to school/work/home, younger siblings are expecting them back for their birthday party tomorrow- what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_kkfym", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can I legally have a house party?", "post": "A few days ago, the police interrupted a weekly gathering I have with friends due to a noise complaint somewhere in the area. This has been a traditional gathering for many years at this house, and we've never had the cops tell us to shut it down. Now we're on a short leash with the law. I don't want to stop having this weekly gathering, but I don't want to get ticketed instead of just a warning.\n\nNormally we charge $5 a cup, pretty much a standard kegger. The main difference between this and a normal kegger is we know everyone that's coming. Usually 20-40 of our friends will show up. Would it be legal if we did the following?\n\n* Still charged for cups\n* 21+ only\n* Avoided breaking other, non alcohol-related laws (noise, littering, etc).\n\nOr is there still an issue with selling alcohol out of a private residence? Could we simply ask for monetary donations to cover costs rather than actually charge?", "summary": "Want to have kegger for just friends (not open door) at my house in Wisconsin, is there a legal way to do it?"}
{"id": "t3_1zhh0k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] broke up with my boyfriend [24/M] of 6 years, and I regret it.", "post": "We were together for 6+ years and had been fighting a lot, among other things. I decided to break up because I thought we couldn't resolve our issues (we'd tried and failed), he told me he thought I was giving up on us, but I disagreed. I really thought I was making the right decision. We agreed not to talk anymore, and he basically disappeared from the radar. \nThe thing is, I regret it so much. I want him back; I had a lot of time to think and reflect about it and realized I made a huge mistake. I know he still loves me, and I'm 90% sure he'd agree to talk to me about us and the possibility of staying together. I just don't know what to say so that he'll forgive me for all the pain that I've caused him... :(.\n\nWhat I'm asking for is advice on how to handle the conversation. I want us to get back together, I love him dearly and I'm willing to do anything in my power for us to be a couple again. But I'm not really good at talking and explaining myself, or my feelings... so I would really appreciate if you guys could give me a few tips on how to handle myself, how to prepare and what to say.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "I broke up with my boyfriend of six years and I regret it. I know he still loves me and want to get in touch with him... I need advice on what to say and how to say it."}
{"id": "t3_3g5d9m", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by forgetting that yesterday was the 6th of the month", "post": "My girlfriend who I have been dating for 2 months had lost her father 5 months ago and overall very shortly before I had met her online. All in all she has not taking been taking it well as one can imagine and it's been a struggle on all fronts. The tragedy took place on the 6th of the month, 3 months prior to meeting her so it really was so fresh. IN addition to having a lot of trouble with it all and every 6th of the month is extremely difficult on her. \n\nYesterday was the 6th and after a super long and busy day I got caught up in my own plans and life. We didn't talk much that day and I had obviously forgotten the date so at the end of the day I received a nasty drunk text message from my girlfriend telling me how badly I fucked up. Sadly when she drinks she gets emotionally abusive and despite me apologizing the conversation got super heated and after a bunch of \"fuck yous\" thrown my way it was clear things were not going well. \n\nWe've had a rocky two months and this isn't the first time her alcohol tendencies tend to be taken out on me. I definitely fucked up but what happened last night was totally uncalled for and now...both of us don't know where this is all leading.", "summary": "Forgot to be there for my girl on the monthly anniversary of her father's death, huge drunk fight may be the last straw in our relationship."}
{"id": "t3_4l79qp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] was instantly attracted to a guy [20M] on my new job. How do I pursue him?!", "post": "I've found myself in an unusual situation. I started my new job a couple of weeks ago and all of my co workers have been awesome. It's mostly people aged 18-23 working there and in midst of everything I've discovered a really hot guy. I'm rarely attracted to someone, but this just clicked when I saw him. I couldn't take my eyes off him and he looked back at me, and I think he understood I was checking him out (awkward as f).\n\nI have no relationship experience since before and I don't know how to approach guys I'm attracted to/interested in. I used to like popular guys in HS but I never had a chance so I didn't even try. So guys and gals, how do I pursue this guy and let him know of my interest? And best of all, how do I get him to be interested in me? I look average 6-7, do you think I stand a chance? How do I charm him?", "summary": "I'm attracted to a co worker at my new job and I don't know how to pursue him since I'm inexperienced when it comes to these things. Please help!"}
{"id": "t3_2zl32l", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Travelling with a cochlear implant", "post": "(X-post with [r/deaf] )\n\nSo this might be a long shot, but I'm looking for a little advice. I'm going to be taking a 2 month trip through Europe with my boyfriend. We are hostelling/airbnb-ing with our backpacks and doing europe on the cheap (as possible).\n\nI am hard of hearing with one hearing aid (left) and one cochlear (right). I've traveled extensively with hearing aids before and it's pretty low maintenance. However, I've only had a cochlear for 3 years now and have yet to travel outside of the Us with one. I'm fairly able to communicate without sign language and my speech is quite good.\n\nI am wondering the following:\n-----------------------------------------------------\n\n1. How should I keep my battery charged: bring my charger / disposable individual batteries / both? It generally takes 1-1/2 hours to charge a battery with the charger. They last for 2.5 days. Batteries where you replace individually them are 2 at a time and disposable and last as long but generally are more expensive than using the rechargeable\n\n2. Do you suggest I bring up my back up cochlear or leave it at home. I'm thinking at home, but bringing some basic things like hooks because they are cheap\n\n3. Are people in Europe generally open and friendly towards disabled persons / hard of hearing members? \n\n4. Is it easy to pick up 675 zinc air blue tab batteries in stores in Europe? I ask because I wonder how easy it'll be to get more if they are stolen / lost / etc\n\n5. Anything else I should consider while travelling with a cochlear implant?\n\nAlso in case it helps, my itinerary: The Netherlands > Belgium > West Germany > France > Switzerland > Austria/Hungary > Czech > Poland > Germany > Denmark \nWe are spending at least 3 days in each place.", "summary": "I am travelling to Europe with a cochlear, any advice? Or am I just a little too worried about it."}
{"id": "t3_13sqs5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Best Friend [19m] is way too chatty with my girlfriend [20f], how do I proceed to make him back off a little?", "post": "My girlfriend and I [19m] have been dating for almost a year and a half. I met her in high school and we ended up going to different schools in the same town. We started dating before my freshman year/her sophomore year. Everything has been amazing, except my suitemate has also taken a strong interest in her over the last semester. They met last year but really only started to hang out this year, which is great because I want all of my friends to like my girlfriend, and I want her to like them. What isn't great is he has begun to text/fb message her constantly. He has even called her a few times out of the blue with no real reason for calling. Also he has also done more boyfriendish things with her such as picking her up from the bus stop while I was at work, then inviting her up to our room while I wasn't around (she politely refused). He has a history of doing this to other people's significant others, so this isn't out of jealousy, it's more to look for a way of creating a boundary and hopefully helping him move on to girls who don't have boyfriends.\n\nI'm not worried about my girlfriend cheating on me and there isn't anything that she does to lead him on. She is just nice to him, like she is with everyone.\n\nMy girlfriend and I both agree that we need to do something, so we were wondering if there is a better way to approach this.", "summary": "Suitemate/friend is becoming more and more clingy with my girlfriend of 1.5 years. What is the best way to approach this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_3olv6u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M22] think my girlfriend [F24] of a year and a half is cheating.", "post": "Ok we meet in a city I'm planning on living in once I finish college.  I had to go back home to finish my last semester. We started long distance in August and at first it was going great.  I mean long distance is shitty but we were making it work, we talked on the phone everyday.  She started her new job and was overwhelmed with working until 7 on some days.  I should mention that there's a 3 hour difference between us, but she still found time to talk before I went to bed.  \n\nThen I came to visit and she was so distant, she had ZERO interest in sex.  We had sex once and she showed no emotion.  We weren't really clicking with our conversations either then I went back home after a quick weekend visit.  We haven't really recovered from that and she has been hanging out with one of her male coworkers a lot.  Now we talk 3 times a week and hardly text.  Every time I send something flirty, she just ignores it.  Doesn't even acknowledge it.  \n\nHas she just checked out?  Maybe there is something we can do to fix the situation.  Do you guys think she's cheating?  What are your thoughts.  Also I'm visiting her again tomorrow so should I even bring this up or wait to see how the visit goes.  Also I'm moving back in 2 months, should I just stick it out?", "summary": "Was fine before we started long distance, now she is distant, hanging out a lot with a male coworker, I'm moving back in two months."}
{"id": "t3_52422y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [32/M], married w/ a kid, am corresponding a lot w/ a girl. Is it emotional cheating ?", "post": "OK, so I am married with a wonderful woman and we have a small kid. We always had a semi-open relationship, in the following sense: when we are apart (eg work trip), it's no big deal if we hook up with a random person. It's a bit of don't ask don't tell. \n\n3 months ago, I traveled to Asia (the other side of the world for me), hooked up with a fun girl for two nights. Since then, we have been writing a lots of emails back and forth, chatting a lot about random things. It did get more personal as we shared some things (not about my family though). It's a new thing for me, as the deal with my wife is hooking up, and usually I don't follow up. Is this cheating ? I have essentially no chance of meeting that girl ever again due to geographical reasons.", "summary": "my wife and I are ok with the other one hooking up when traveling. Hooked up with someone and kept emailing. Is that ok ?"}
{"id": "t3_2bd8pt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my GF [21 F] 2.5 yrs, double-brother sex?", "post": "I just want to say that I've gotten past this (haha maybe I haven't since I'm asking this) and I believe it was just a weak point of her life.\n\nMy girlfriend of 2.5 years lost her virginity to a guy in highschool. Long story short he messed around with other girls and bascially broke her heart/dumped her. \n\nSo she was at a party a couple mothers later and his brother was there. Once again, long story short she ended up fucking his brother out of pure spite. To get back at him. \n\nNow it's been a long time since this has happened, and honestly I don't think of it that much, but it is a little fucked up. \n\nIt's fucked up because she said she enjoyed it, she enjoyed getting the revenge. We talked about this a year ago. \n\nI'm just going to assume she was a weak phase in her life, she is now hopelessly devoted to me and has always been faithful and honest. And I will never hold it to her for stuff she has done in the past, but wow that is something else, especially since she still says the revenge was sweet.", "summary": "Current girlfriend's first sex/love cheated on her, and she fucked his brother for revenge. Tells me a year ago that she enjoyed getting revenge."}
{"id": "t3_2n3n07", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [23 M] trying to spend Thanksgiving break alone to complete the final, hardest part of my taper of a physically dependent prescription. My family refuses to accept any excuses and is suggesting consequences if I don't show up.", "post": "I was prescribed Klonopin daily a few months back, and quitting them is extremely difficult. It's not a surprise, but I'm trying to make the final transition from a small dosage, to none. \n\nDoing this at my job severely effects my work ability, which is unacceptable for it being my dream job out of college, and only a month in. Being around my family would not only have to stop my taper, but possibly even set me back by having to increase it, due to the high amounts of socializing expected at the family events. \n\nMy family does not ~~approve of~~ understand medicine, and the suggestion of having to \"taper\" off something would have them label me as a drug addict, they simply do not understand medications, I know this from past experiences.\n\nMy only excuse right now is that my girlfriend's dad is upset that I haven't met him before me and her move in together (true, and understandable, but that's another issue), and that I'll be spending Thanksgiving with her family instead to meet them (not true). \n\nThey are extremely upset, especially that I've given them such short notice. I would have told them sooner if I had realized how difficult this last tapering section would be, and the risk of being set back at the family events.", "summary": "Do I have any options in this situation? Spending Thanksgiving alone is the best possible thing for my long term situation and health, but it could be very damaging for my relationship with my parents. How can I approach this?"}
{"id": "t3_1pbh33", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "17 M, trying to determine how important virginity really is.", "post": "Okay, r/relationship_advice. I need your help. So there is this girl I've known for the past almost 7 years, and now in the latter stages of high school, we finally \"have a thing\". We would always flirt in middle school, and in sophomore year of high school, I worked up the courage to ask her on a date. She was blunt and dismissive, and told me she had a boyfriend. He was a well-known scumbag, and I thought that she was smart enough, high achieving, and different enough from this kid that their relationship would end soon. It didn't, they proceeded to date for 1 1/2 years and he took her virginity. They finally broke up because he also had sex with his best friend's girlfriend, and he broke her heart. She now has deep trust issues, so that now she is extremely cautious with me and relates everything back to how this one kid broke her heart. But she likes me, and says she wants to continue being with me, but I simply don't know how I feel about how she gave her virginity to this scumbag. Is this a big deal? Should I really be concerned with this? I've been with a handful of girls in high school, and even gotten rather intimate with a few, but would *never* consider going that far with them. So the fact that she did, with this kid, scares me a lot. She's incredible, smart, adorable, and high-achieving, and I just want to know whether this factor should really be affecting me this much. Thanks for your time.", "summary": "Girl I'm in love with lost her virginity to scumbag ex-boyfriend, and it's freaking me out."}
{"id": "t3_17r4gk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [18M] been dating a [18F] for two years and she's changing what college she's attenting for me. I have strong feelings for her but I'm confused about my sexuality.", "post": "We've [18M&F] been friends since middle school and started dating a little over two years ago. About a year ago I started at age 16/17 to notice guys a lot more and today it has evolved to me prefering to watch gay porn rather than straight, don't ask me how these things work. \n\nThat doesn't change my feelings for this girl, she's been my best friend for almost all my teenage years. We shared all our firsts, our sex life is great and she's the only person I feel I can trust completely (except maybe with the gay thing).\n\nEven with all that, I'm terrified I may slip one night in college and hook up with a guy which I must admit intrigues me greatly even though I can't imagine hurting her like that. I signed up on grindr six months ago just to see if there were guys in my neighborhood who I knew on there and that made me feel sick.\n\nShe told me two weeks ago that she can't imgaine being apart for so long every year and that she found similar courses at my college but it will cost her more so I'm not sure how to feel about that or what to do.", "summary": "My girlfriend is changing her college plans for me, I love her but I'm confused about my sexuality and unsure about my future."}
{"id": "t3_4scwk3", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[GA] Medical provider choosing to put lien on car wreck settlement rather than accept P's insurance. Any workarounds?", "post": "GA attorney here,\n\nI've landed a huge tort case involving a guy who was really messed up in a car wreck. The tortfeasor was an employee of a well-known company and the damages are pretty high. \n\nThe one wrinkle in this case (and there's always one...) is that P's hospital has *refused* to accept his group health coverage to pay for his bills and is instead filing a lien on the settlement proceeds. \n\nThis could potentially screw my client over in a major way. He has hundreds of thousands of dollars in medical bills. He pays for insurance so that they can cover these bills. Why on earth is he paying for insurance if the medical provider can simply reject it, take all of the money he gets from a settlement, and leave him with nothing after repayment of medical bills + attorney's fees?\n\nTheoretically we could go to court in a year and lose. How on earth is he expected to pay them back at that point? More likely, we could not win enough to fairly compensate him if he must pay back his attorneys and his doctors too. \n\nI'm a younger attorney and I've never experienced this situation before. If anyone has any ideas on how to approach this and somehow force the hospital to accept payment from the insurance company (who is literally sitting around waiting to pay them), I'd love to hear it.", "summary": "Car wreck case. P's med providers refused to accept insurance and instead put lien on settlement proceeds. Looking for a way to force them to accept insurance."}
{"id": "t3_434ygc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (27F) coworker stinks to high heaven. I don't know what to do. Please help.", "post": "I've been working at my current job for about a year. I like it so enough, it's in the field I want to be in, etc. In other words, I'm not going to find another job over this.\n\nI work with a woman in her 70s that I'll call June. June stinks. It's like she doesn't shower. Her ponytail is always greasy. But it wasn't always like this. It's been reoccurring, but it's never been this bad.\n\nWhen I walk into the workroom I smell her. When I sit next to her desk I smell her. When I have to walk by the two office rooms that we use, I smell her. I went into one of the rooms after she had left one day and I literally gagged it was so bad. One day she stood too close to me and I could TASTE her stink, like I was at a petting zoo.\n\nI have told my supervisor. Others have complained too. My supervisor knows it's an issue and has escalated the situation. HR refuses to do anything. They don't want to embarrass her, and frankly I think they're afraid she'll go after them for firing her for being old. They have said they'll give her a couple of months (!!!) to see if the issue resolves itself.\n\nIt's so bad I lose my appetite for lunch. I'm scared I'm going to go home and my boyfriend will tell me I stink. I think her stench sticks to things.\n\nMine and my supervisor's hands are tied.\n\nWhat can I do? We can't use aerosols because they aggravate people's allergies, so I can't even use febreeze. I've thought about perfume but I don't want to make myself overwhelming trying to block her stench. I've thought about peppermint oil under my nose, but frankly, I don't think I should have to fuck up my skin because the old lady won't shower.\n\nPlease give me advice. When my boss told me she couldn't do anything I wanted to cry. It's been 2 weeks now and I can't stand this smell anymore. I'm at my wits end.", "summary": "I have an elderly coworker that doesn't bathe. HR refuses to talk to her until a couple of months have passed. I'm at the end of my rope and hyper paranoid about her smell rubbing off onto my clothes."}
{"id": "t3_1uu99m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my new boyfriend [26] of 2 months. He's a momma's boy", "post": "Okay, so I've been seeing this guy for just about 2 months and things started off great. He is kind, attentive and adores me. There is no problem in our relationship except his mother. He is a mommas boy, which would be okay if she wasn't into illegal activities that she brings him into and involves him in. \n\nHe has told me that he is very close to his mother and that they only have each other. His mother is 50yrs old and deals drugs. She sometimes gets my boyfriend to do it for her as well, she has also given him drugs. She comes to stay at his house and smokes pot in the living room (I'm okay with being an end but surely she could do it outside). She stays for days upon days and just demands his attention. When I'm at his house she gets shitty if we leave to go do something (like get coffee).\n\nRecently I had police show up while I was at his house (he was at work) because they had found some illegally dumped rubbish that his mother made me dump late at night as they didn't want to pay to take it out to the rubbish dump!\n\nI'm having a hard time handling this sort of activity. I'm not a prude but I didn't grow up around anything like this. My parents were very law abiding, conservative people and this is just a whole new world. Can anyone give me advice on how to deal with this? Or someone with experience dating someone who was close to one parent? I tried having a conversation about this with him but he gets very defensive and so does his mother. He tells her EVERYTHING", "summary": "new bf is a mommas boy which would be okay if she wasn't into illicit drugs and involving him in her criminal activities"}
{"id": "t3_shmsg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I just accidentally broke a mouse's back trying to catch it in a tub. To end its misery quickly I threw it out my 3rd-floor window thinking the tarmac would do the rest, instead it bounced off a traffic warden. Any other fails in the name of humanity?", "post": "Here's the back-story:\n\nWe've had a mouse problem for a couple of months now. Rather than use poison I've laid out a number of humane traps with the idea of relocating them. \n\nI spotted one scampering behind my board games so got a couple of nice big tubs and tried to tease him out, sadly I hurt his back in the process and he rolled over, eyes blinking and looking panicky. Not wanting him to suffer I quickly figured the best course of action would be to hurl him out the nearby open window. I thought 2 seconds of freefall is preferable to 30 second of stom-finding-his-hammer-and-a-bit-of-newspaper.\n\nI tried to lob him into the road but I guess a gust of wind foiled the plan and he drifted a bit and hit a traffic warden on his shoulder (well, tricep, but meh) who didn't seem to notice.\n\nNow I'm feeling guilty, so it's up to you Reddit to **distract me with tales of well-meant intentions gone awry**.", "summary": "Tried to catch mouse, broke its back. Threw it out window for mercy, got an unexpected comfy landing. Feelsbadman.jpg."}
{"id": "t3_449yxy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (32M) taller girlfriend (33F) of seven weeks has recently been mentioning the difference in our heights a lot recently", "post": "I am 5'8\"/1.73m and my GF is 6'/1.83m.  We started dating about seven weeks ago and things seemed to go well for the past few weeks.  This past Tuesday we were talking about something I do not remember and I said that I am 5'8\".  She disagreed and was in disbelief that I am 4\"/10cm shorter than her.  She kept saying that maybe I measured incorrectly and that I am at least 5'10\"/1.78m.  She was ok with the height difference until she realized the numerical value of the difference.\n\nI thought Tuesday was the end of it, but she has mentioned it while talking to her yesterday on the phone and also today while we were walking in the park.\n\nI am uncertain what to make of it.  Maybe nothing, maybe discomfort.", "summary": "GF was ok with me being shorter until she discovered the difference is 4\"/10cm and has mentioned it several times in two days."}
{"id": "t3_wacek", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Too late to set the record straight. Or is it?", "post": "25f. \n\nAbout five years ago, I briefly dated someone my age before leaving for university abroad. We promised to write, to somehow make it work, but two months into the LDR it I realized it was too difficult and we barely knew each other, so it was too big of a sacrifice. I wrote him a sweet but realistic letter and broke it off. Six months later I met the guy (also my age) who I got into my first serious relationship with, we've been together for five years now. He too eventually dated someone he's still with. \n\nWhen I returned home one summer, he immediately dumped his gf so he could ask me out, but I was taken and I wasn't cool with stealing someone's boyfriend, so I said no and he got hurt. \n\nAfter all this time I find out today that he thought I had first dumped him because I cheated on him. I didn't! Half a year passed before I dated someone again! And it seems petty compared to other problems on here, but I'm really bothered by this and I wish I could set the record straight. I didn't dump him because I cheated or met someone else, I dumped him because it was right, and from a long term perspective, I did him a favor.  But I can't set the record straight because so many years have passed, and I dread being \"that\" person. I just wish he knew I was truthful to him when we were together. \n\nI'm torn. Is my gut right about this? Or should I tell him? It sucks that it stuck with everyone that I cheated on him, because he's very well liked in our circle of friends, and apparently all this time I've been \"the cheater\".", "summary": "my circle of friends wrongly think of me as a cheater because of a break-up with one of their best friends years ago, and I don't know if I should bother setting the record straight at this point."}
{"id": "t3_1ivrhg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Has anybody suffered through child abuse (of any kind), and have it greatly affect how they act and deal with situations today? How have you overcome it or if you haven't, how are you dealing with it?", "post": "I've recently started dealing with the fact that I was physically abused by my father for a good 10 years of my childhood. I've never talked about it with anybody or really been aware of how it affects me until my most recent relationship with my current BF. We've been together for 9 months and I would get upset at the smallest and most insignificant things and completely blow up within seconds. \n\nI started seeing a therapist this past March and I've felt it has helped a little bit. These past few weeks have gotten especially bad though as I have begun resorting to self destructive ways (hitting myself, cutting). My bf can no longer put up with my behavior and is telling me we should end things. I can't help but feel at a total loss now that the person I love most is thinking of abandoning me. \n\nI'm curious to know what other people in similar situations have done/are doing? For me, it just seems like a vicious cycle that I can't get out of. The same thing over and over again: Get annoyed, get mad, blow up/yell, calm down, feel regret/apologize profusely. Basically the same process my father would get into when he would hit me. He once told me to try and talk to him while he was mad and say something like \"Dad, it's ok. you're calm. you don't need to do this.\" But it never worked. \n\nI'm afraid I will just end up like him, hurting everybody around me whether it be emotional or physical. A part of me is afraid to have children because of what I could possibly do to them when I get upset. Anybody else out there with similar situations?\n\nI checked and have seen a few threads posted a year ago dealing with the topic of child abuse, but not one really asking how people are coping/have coped with it. (Maybe there were and I just missed them; I'm new to reddit btw so sorry if this post is redudant!).\n\nAnyway, thanks for reading if you took the time to do so.", "summary": "Had an abusive childhood. It's affecting important relationships I have in my life now. Don't know how to cope. Anybody have similar situations? How are you coping/How have you coped?"}
{"id": "t3_31mmp1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Been having a rough time with my SO lately. What should I do? [M/F late 20s]", "post": "So, theres been a lot going on lately with my boyfriend of two years, and I'm honestly not sure what to do. \n\nThroughout the course of our relationship, he has  always been late for pretty much everything, to the point where if we make plans with others, I will tell him a different time so he will show up sort of on time. The worst is with me though. We will plan to spend the day together, and often he will show up at 8-10 pm, hours later than the agreed time making me wait around for him all day with no forewarning that he will actually show up soon. Often we will just end up watching Netflix together because he shows up so late that there's not much open, so we don't really ever go on dates anymore.  \n\nHe also has started to make little effort in actually making contact with me unless it's after 10 pm, when he knows I am going to sleep for work the next day. It feels like I'm always calling him all the time as well. When I've asked him to call me earlier while he's at school if he can't make it home by a reasonable time, he won't take a 5 min break to call me while he's there, and will call late at night.  When I have tried to talk to him about this,  he immediately  gets defensive and doesn't own up to any of it. Then he will go on to say that he should quit school because apparently asking him to be on time and call me before I go to sleep (he often wakes me up) is too much for him.  I'm also in school, so it really upsets me that he uses school as an excuse to not put effort into our relationship. \n\nLately our sex life has suffered as well. I'm always initating and getting turned down more often than not. We've gone from 1-3x a week to once a month in the last couple of months. \n\nHe always says he loves me, wants to marry me and have kids with me, but he has a funny way of showing it. I love him but I'm starting to get very frustrated.", "summary": "boyfriend is always late, not making an effort to sustain our relationship and our sex life is starting to suffer as well. What should I do? How should I approach this?"}
{"id": "t3_3adqvs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF [24F] of 4 years cheated on me [25M] on a vacation, is it forgivable?", "post": "While on vacation with a friend my GF [24F] was approached by a guy at a bar, told him she had a boyfriend and continued talking to this guy, ended up kissing him later in the evening. She texts me that night (5am) that \"we have to talk\", I wake up at 5 pm next day (bc of work my sleep schedule is odd) and she proceeds to tell me what she's done. I'm in shock and dealing with some other really bad family shit (she doesn't know at  this point, I was waiting for her to return to tell her) so we barely talk.\n\nThe next day we talk and she's honest about what happened and Im starting to forgive her.\n\nToday (when she returned), I drove to her house and we talked, it was good, the only part that was off and I reacted at the time but now (hours later) its eating away at me. She said that the next day before Iwoke up she had met this guy back at the bar and they \"made out\" before he made some \"asshole\" comments and they parted. \n\nI was ready to forgive but this second act to me is worse, she wasn't drunk  when she agreed to meet this guy, although she said she was \"devastated\" bc she knew I was going to break up with her. THEN she ended up getting drunk and making out with this guy, Im guessing while texting me about the whole incident.\n\nI want to forgive her, she's very self conscious and doesn't drink alcohol, she's taking this pretty hard as far as I can tell and what she has shown. The second meeting just digs at me. I love her. \n\nAm I crazy for wanting to forgive her?", "summary": "GF kissed guy at bar told me next day, she tells me 2 days later that she met him a second time, same day she told me about first kiss. ***"}
{"id": "t3_2k053x", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Do I [25F] risk losing the friendship I've formed with ex [35M] and sleep with him?", "post": "My ex boyfriend and I dated for 7 or so months. He was always really busy and I felt neglected, so much so that I ended the relationship. We had the best sex I have ever had in my life though. We've remained friends.\n\nThen I began to date this other guy, Tom. Tom and I were together for two and a half years. We lived together and everything was great until it wasn't anymore. He is 28 and I'm 25 and he just stopped being attracted to me I guess, because he would never try to sleep with me. I had to initiate everything and half the time he would reject me because he was on adderall or something. We didn't click sexually. In fact, when I told him how I wanted rough sex, he replied about how he \"isn't into rape\" and made me feel really shitty. I broke up with him last Thursday (it was very civil, he didn't try to get me to change my mind, it's very obvious he's no longer interested) and he is in the process of moving out. He's not staying at my house, he is just packing on the weekends (while i stay at my sisters) and should be out by the end of this weekend.\n\nI have been talking to my ex lately about my breakup and he's really been supportive. Not like a \"I want to get in your pants\" supportive, but just a really great listener. He's probably one of my best friends, but I really want to fuck him. In fact we've talked about it. Neither of us want to date again, we just both agreed it was like the best sex ever. My question is - do I go down the sticky friends with benefits road with my ex? I don't want to \"ruin\" our friendship, but we've already had sex before and I kind of feel like this would make our friendship stronger. He's the most open person ever sexually, we explore all kinds of fantasies. Of course I won't be sleeping with anyone until all of Tom's shit is out of my house because I need to make sure I close that door for real. Keep in mind I haven't have sex for about 5 or so months.", "summary": "I am super fucking horny and am getting out of a relationship with a guy who never wanted to have sex. Do I have sex with the guy who I dated before him, who is now my close friend?"}
{"id": "t3_xymzc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Are there any uncircumcised Jews out there?  I really need to know.", "post": "OK, here's the story.  I'm having my second child.  It's going to be a boy.  My first was a boy.  I didn't want to circumcise him, but I gave in to family pressure.  One of the things I was told was, 'don't worry, everyone does it and everyone is fine.'  Well, after seeing the first emotional expression on my newborn baby's face; fear, pain, confusion... it was traumatizing for me to say the least.  Yes, he's fine now, but that memory will always haunt me.  (And perhaps him too, who knows)  \nSo, now, with boy #2 on the way I am absolutely refusing to put myself and my child through that again!  As you can imagine, I feel I am totally alone in this.  Yes, my husband is standing by me, but he is also being affected by the stress of it.  \nNow, I've been raised Jewish, but I'm not a religious person at all.  I've *always* questioned tradition. I don't keep kosher, I travel on the Sabbath, I don't go to temple, even on the high holidays.  So, I can't justify putting another child through, what I feel is, an out dated traditional ceremony.  It just doesn't feel right.  There is an alternative ceremony that includes the blessings and the bagels ;) but no cutting.  \nOf course there's the issue of both boys being different and if it might cause a problem for my child in the future.  \nSo, my question is, are there any Jewish males out there who have gone through this ceremony and what was it like for you growing up?  Are there any brothers out there who are different in that way and how does it effect your relationship?  \nIf anyone wants to share their story about how they wish they were or weren't circumcised, I'd be interested in hearing it.", "summary": "I'm refusing to circumcise my second boy.  No one is happy with my decision.  Looking for advice from those with experience"}
{"id": "t3_3bldqq", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "My Parenting Opposite", "post": "Tonight I met my parenting opposite and I wish I could say it was a good experience, that we learned from each other, had a good calm discussion and thoughtfully went our separate ways pondering the others perspective.  I can't say any of that.  I can say that she watched her son utilizing public property incorrectly and instead of correcting him and using it as a teaching moment she stood by and watched as my Mom attempted to correct him repeatedly, until finally telling the child she needed his full name to report to the police after they found the park property broken due to his choices.  This woman then had the amazing audacity to come to my Mom and tell her how RUDE it was to scare her child by mentioning the cops!  I jumped in with some words of my own and she told me how this is not how Christ would do things.  I absolutely disagree, Christ was and is a great man because He does NOT accept improper behavior.  He in fact threw the money changers out of the temple.  Being Christlike does not being a doormat and never getting mad.  Being Christlike means teaching children right from wrong even if their parents won't, making tough calls and being brave.  We prayed for that little guy and his mother tonight that they might learn from this, but I doubt she will teach her son anything other than how his ego is worth more than being responsible for your actions and choices.  This is disheartening.  This is sad and this is how children now in our society will not recognize the little areas of black, white and grey and will grow up not recognizing big areas of black white and grey.  My children are not angels and when they misbehave in public, I have them go tell people their apologies and what they have learned rather than defending bad choices. UGH! Parenting my own children is hard but parenting yours is ridiculous!", "summary": "If your not going to watch your kids and discipline them when they are about to break public property and someone else does, you don't get to put Christ in your defense!"}
{"id": "t3_1iqra0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Those of you dealing with a breakup may find some appreciation for this. Or at least some new meaning.", "post": "I need to provide some backstory on myself in order to follow the posting rules for the mods. I[M-17] am still getting over being dumped [F-16], just recently saw pictures of her with my replacement. We dated for eight months. I was watching Eternal Sunshine, and read the poem from which the title was taken from. Basically, it was a pretty cliche moment. Around 2am, I can see the moon out my window. I'd just seen the pictures of her with my replacement, and was watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. There was something so beautifully sad in that moment. I pretty much cried through the entire movie, and I wasn't sure if it was out of sadness, me just being a loser, or out of some appreciation of the beauty in the movie, compared to my life situation at the time. The poem and the ending of the film gave me some sort of solace, especially the poem. It made me wonder how I would feel if I could erase her from my memory, and spare myself the heartbreak. You'd be amazed how you can still feel heartbreak even after over a month of being separated; it's pretty mind-boggling the kind of influence one person can have on your emotional health. Logic doesn't help your feelings in these situations. Especially as young as I am, I understand that this overall is a small portion of my life, yet it doesn't make me feel any different. Although, I believe everybody experiences heartbreak the same way, regardless of age. When I read the poem, especially the following excerpt I've given, I felt at peace, in such an oddly miserable way.\n\nI saw some miserable beauty in this. If you're getting through a breakup, you can understand the imaginative desire to have your mind completely erased.\n\n\"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!\n\nThe world forgetting, by the world forgot.\n\nEternal sunshine of the spotless mind!\n\nEach pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd.\"\n\n-excerpt taken from Eloise to Abelard, by Alexander Pope.", "summary": "If you're going through a breakup, read the poem \"Eloise to Abelard\" by Alexander Pope, and watch \"Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.\" It will do something to you."}
{"id": "t3_4mud7i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (37f) am having a hard time with my BF (33m) keeping in touch with his exes.", "post": "I cannot wrap my head around the idea of why people want to stay \"friends\" with their ex. I have one ex around and that is because of my kids. Otherwise I have told them all to hit the bricks because I wouldn't want it to interfere with my current relationship.\n\nMy current bf of over 7 months thinks that it is no big deal to stay friends with his exes and it bothers the shit out of me.\nI have spoke with him on the subject and he says that he was friends with them before and will be friends always. I see no good in this and I'm frustrated!", "summary": "My bf thinks it is ok to stay \"friends\" with exes and I have a hard time understanding why someone wants to be friends with an ex.."}
{"id": "t3_3aws34", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not knowing the relationship in between two friends of mine", "post": "So tonight for a national festivity in Catalonia, we decided to make a diner and then go to a salsa club with one of my groups of friends.\n\nGiven the place we go I think about inviting people from another group of friends to have a better time, but only.my salsa partner responds affirmatively, the rest either had plans or did reject directly the invitation.\n\nFun things is a girl of the main group does not want to get along with my salsa partner because of a \"bad feeling\" and bad things she has heard or acknowledged of her, so she says I didn't take her into account before making this move (she was the last one to answer tho) and that I let her down, she is a friend I appreciate greatly and don't know how to make up for this mistake.", "summary": "I invited my salsa partner to spend the night with a group of friends I have and a girl from said group does not want get along with her and she says that I let her down"}
{"id": "t3_1omi5h", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why doesn't the government find a loophole to get rid of the Federal Reserve Bank?", "post": "From everything I've heard/read the Federal Reserve Bank (which is not  part of or regulated by the Federal government) is shitty and just makes debt by printing money putting the government (and the nation) in an endless cycle of debt. What, if anything, does the government have to gain from this being a thing still? And why isn't this a bigger deal to everyone? Am I misinformed of the actual power this entity has? What more than an old law and \"word is bond\" obligation does the government have to them and why can they finagle their way out of it, since they pretty much do whatever they want anyway?", "summary": "Why is the gubment ok with being the Federal Reserves bitch and what stops them from sticking their nose in this like everything else I'd actually rather them stay out of?"}
{"id": "t3_2maz4e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34 F] with my husband [34 M] 5 years, he cheated, I left, I'm feeling emotionally abused by everyone in my life about it", "post": "By my ex, by therapists, friends. Everyone is managing to make me feel like some kind of egomaniac or something for having a problem with being cheated on. Because \"its not about me\", he was struggling with   his own issues. He couldn't have chosen me over his affair at the time that I demanded he do so, because he wasn't in his right mind essentially, and he needed to grieve his affair. He was genuinely confused about whether or not he wanted me (due to completely self-inflicted issues) and that by focusing on the cheating I'm not dealing with the REAL problem and I'm just \"running away\". That in the right conditions anyone can cheat and I'm being pompous or something for thinking I never would. \n\nI'm sure my ex fucking loves this narrative, it makes everything all about him 24/7. They have me thinking I'm the disordered person for not being able to grasp all this. \n\nI mean Jesus, can't a girl have some standards? Can't cheating simply hurt too much and cause me to lose all interest? I saw everything about how this other relationship developed, what the other woman was doing, can't I just not be interested in being with a self-involved idiot? I feel like this narrative has been set up about how it worked that I simply don't buy into, and it bothers me that that seems to be what the story is. That my inability to forgive, and my demands for respect, are coming from a place of insecurity rather than strength. And I'm just being too black-and-white in my thinking. \n\nAll in all I made more concesssions than I'm even willing to make normally, in the interests of giving our marriage a chance. But I never mattered. And I'm told that's just how it is with the kind of crisis he's having, and he wants me now and wants to work on his problems that caused this crisis so whats the big deal?", "summary": "Husband indulged in an affair, I don't care what his issues are, that apparently makes me lazy or something"}
{"id": "t3_2suyii", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] of almost 4 years, Ive just fallen out of love, but i dont know why.", "post": "This is my first girlfriend and we've been together for nearly 4 years.\n\nSo basically just before we we're celebrating our 3 year anniversary, it felt like id just woken up and couldn't say that i loved her anymore. We talked it over and separated for just over a month before we decided to try again, this went okay for about another 8 months, now we're not far off being together for 4 years and ive decided its time we talk again.\nWe have spoke about fixing it, but i dont know what it is that needs fixing as i dont know why we fell out of love...\n\nWhat should i do, i feel i know what the answer is, but i dont know what i would do without her, any advice would be greatly appreciated.\nThanks", "summary": "Been together four years but things went down hill just after the 3rd, but i dont know why or what i should do."}
{"id": "t3_2h24fx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by making out with a Catholic girl", "post": "This happened today at around 2 AM...\n\nIt was the first party I managed to actually party at this year, being that I am usually a designated driver.\n\nI met this cute Catholic girl, let's call her Hillary. \n\nThings start off okay, I finally built up the courage to start making out with her. Now the kissing wasn't \"kissing\", it was what two drunk people would call making out. Basically a lot of excessive tongue and lip biting, but whatever -- it was still the most I have gotten in a month. \n\nThings start getting hot and heavy in my friends living room. We were both undoing each others pants and I thought we were both really into it. I started foreplay on my end, and she was doing something with my johnson that I don't seem to remember out of bleak drunkeness. \n\n\"Should we head back to your place?\" I asked, hoping my friend's living room floor wasn't my final rest stop for the night.\n\nShe gave no reply, but as I was about to kiss her again she pounced into the air and ran out the front door in what I thought was Mach 3.\n\n*I just stood there* for a moment in a lapse of utter confusion. My pants around my thighs and an erection making itself visible in my briefs, like a ghost in a sheet.\n\n**Now** I don't know exactly what happened. I knocked on my friends door (Let's call her Marie) and asked Marie what had just happened. \n\nMarie told me about Hillary's devotion to Catholicism,  and how she was planning on waiting for marriage to *get down*.\n\nI have yet to hear from her, and I plan on apologizing for what happened when I see her next. I don't think I am in the wrong, neither of us are, but I think it was just a lack of communication at fault.", "summary": "Haven't touched a girl in a month, finally do and I send her running out the front door in my confusion."}
{"id": "t3_2b2pi8", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I like this girl.", "post": "So in high school I asked a girl out. She turned me down. I still crushed on her for a while but eventually I graduated and went to college. I thought I wouldn't see her again so I gave up. She was different than previous crushes I've had because we still talk on Facebook from time to time. \n\nFast forward 4 years, I'm starting my third year at college and she just graduated high school and came to the same college as me. It's an art school so we are both doing some form of art. We like a lot of the same stuff. I'm crushing on her again but even more so than in high school. \n\nHer and her friend sat down with me and my friend the other day in the lounge while waiting for our next classes. We talked for a while. We talked about a bunch of stuff from video games to what she planned on doing when she graduates. from what I can tell, she is not interested in me at all though because I'm unattractive and she is very attractive. I don't know what to do. I am going to ask for her number when I talk to her next week but I don't want to make things awkward. She probably already knows I like her which could be awkward enough. What should I do?", "summary": "I really like a girl who turned me down years ago. She now goes to the same college as me. We talk but she doesn't seem interested in me"}
{"id": "t3_2hl09a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [23F] tell the owner of the dogs I'm sitting that they destroyed my property?", "post": "I'm babysitting two little dogs through a website called Rover. An owner contacts me online when he is going out of town, I watch the dogs and get paid. These two dogs were with me for 5 nights. I have a full time job. When I went to work, I came home and one of them had completely destroyed my expensive reading glasses, my flats and my EarPods for my iPhone. They did well over $100 worth of damage. A lot more damage then I am getting paid for. They had to jump on a table to get to that stuff, it was not laying on the ground. Do I tell the owner that the dogs damaged my property? If I tell him, should I expect him to pay for it? Or is that the risk I take watching a stranger's dogs?", "summary": "Dogs I'm babysitting did over $100 worth of damage to my property. I don't know if I should tell the owner and expect him to pay for it."}
{"id": "t3_4iyq1s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Doubts about getting married", "post": "I want to start by saying I met my fianc\u00e9 almost a year ago and we immediately clicked. I felt like I've known the guy forever, and that I could say anything to him. I've never felt that way about anyone before. We ended up getting engaged 5 months after we started dating. He was definitely ready to get married before I was, because we are relatively young (24 years old) and I had always planned to get married later in life, but decided there was no point in waiting if I already met \"the one\"\n\nI feel like I'm having doubts about getting married. When we argue about small things, the arguments turn huge. Im not as \"loving\" or emotional as my fianc\u00e9 would like. He's been amazing about communicating that with me and I'm very proud of him for doing so, because I understand that's difficult. And I agree I am not as romantic as he is, and agree to work on it.\n\nThe thing is, sometimes when we fight, he is so stubborn. At first I was hoping it was just my point of view that was skewed and I was just afraid of being wrong, but now when we argue I often sit there quietly just to listen to the things he says. The way he fights isn't fair- even if I apologize for something, he says I'm not apologetic enough. If I stay quiet, he accuses me of wanting to fight and not trying. If I try and tell my point of view, he says I don't listen to him enough. He's wonderful and thoughtful when we arent arguing, and I know everyone argues, but when we argue I feel so helpless to the point where I can't get my point across and we stop talking for hours, sometimes even a day or two. I've only been in two relationships before this, but those weren't nearly as serious. Is this normal?", "summary": "My fiance and I don't fight fair, and it results in us not talking for hours or even days and me doubting our relationship altogether. Is this normal?"}
{"id": "t3_tbnqo", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "I am in Lima and need advice on bus companies and prices to Cuzco. Looking for cheaper companies.", "post": "I am currently in Lima. Long story short, my bags got lost in Mexico City and I only received them last night. 5 days without anything kind of drained my budget pretty quickly and I need to get to Cuzco in the next few days. I have found it is pretty difficult to find out about bus companies without actually going to the bus station. The hostel I am staying in, The Point, only gives me times and prices for Cruz del Sur. It is a very safe and comfortable company, but a little bit more than I would like to pay. Also, just going to the bus station to check it out is an option, but that is another 20-30 soles I would rather not spend. I have about 115 Soles in my pocket and about 500 more available to me for about the next 8 days.  Even if I could get the ball rolling and find a cheap bus to Ica or Huacachina. The safer the better, obviously. Just want to kind of get a feel for prices, it is my first time in South America. \n\nThanks!", "summary": "Low budget, need some prices and advice from someone who has experienced a cheaper bus company. Lima to Cuzco, or anything in between. Gracias!"}
{"id": "t3_3h8wjt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24M] want to break up with my gf [23F] of 2.5 years but I'm having trouble.", "post": "I am in love with her.\n\nShe is emotionally abusive to me. Whenever we have arguments she uses past arguments as weapons against me, saying stuff like I remember that time when you did this or that and you're mean.\n\nShe uses the past, despite us having resolved those issues again, against me as if they were never resolved. \n\nAlso she never lets me have a chance at discussion; whenever she expresses her dislike of something its more of a rant than a discussion. She goes on and on about how she thinks I did something was mean, then as Im about to reply she goes \"...and then also ____\" and its just a rant and I can't even reply.  She makes me feel like a horrible person.\n\nThe problem is the thought of her with another guy and sleeping with him for some reason hurts me incredibly. She's incredibly beautiful so that doesn't help either. How do i overcome this?", "summary": "Girlfriend is emotionally abusive and I want to break up with her, but the thought of her having sex with another man or falling in love with him hurts me. How do I overcome this?"}
{"id": "t3_4dab1a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My roommate's GF [23F] has the flu and now practically lives at our apartment. If I get sick, do I have the right to be mad?", "post": "I [23M] need advice on how to handle this situation. My roommate [23M] and I live in a small two bedroom apartment. He has his GF over probably 5 nights a week. It doesn't bother me. But now she has the flu and has pretty much not left our apartment for more than a couple hours for the past 6 days. She lives on a boat that I've never seen but I think is in disrepair - hence her staying over so much. I get that staying in his bed is probably the best place for her recovery (as opposed to on the boat) but I feel like I'm starting to come down with something. Do I have the right to be pissed at him if I catch what she has?\n\nI've been good friends with my roommate since childhood and I get along with his (relatively new) GF pretty well too. If she had her own apartment I wouldn't feel bad telling him that she needs to stay away until she's better, but since she's living on a unfinished boat, I feel like telling him she has to go would be like throwing her out on the street. Every twenty minutes I can hear her coughing up a lung. I know the flu virus doesn't transmit via surfaces very well, but I don't think she covers her mouth when she coughs. She also doesn't work so is here 24/7 and smokes weed multiple times a day - which I can't imagine helps her coughing get better faster.\n\nWhat should I do?", "summary": "Roommates GF is very sick and is now living at our apartment. I am worried I am going to get sick and want her out, but she has a poor living situation, what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1i51st", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "One cat seems to no longer recognize the other one", "post": "I have two female cats that live inside the house and never go outside. Yesterday night one of them allegedly flew through a window, and we noticed it few minutes/hours later.\n\nI found her wandering in the garden, all wet and dirty. I guess she fell to the pool, as we have a dog outside and maybe scared her and ran away.\n\nThe thing is, once inside home again, the other cat (btw they are sisters and been always together) seems to no longer recognize her, and starts doing a sound like growling after smelling her.\n\nIt could be just because she still smells different and it will pass or could be something else?", "summary": "One cat flew home at night and (maybe) fell to the pool. The other one now growls at her."}
{"id": "t3_1904om", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Why the internet can be a dark and conflicted place.", "post": "I've had way too much time on my hands lately, and have been in a weird state of mind in general. I've been using the internet since the 90's, but I'm in no way saying that I'm some kind of veteran-hipster of interweb depravity. I would consider myself a general user. \n\nOn reddit and other social networking sites, there is a lot of hate and conflict- I think this is because people are terrified. We are terrified of being so close to the inner thoughts of an infinite number of minds. We have been abruptly thrust into a new age of total mental nakedness, living without privacy, and the anonymity factor just adds to the chaos and panic. It's scary, exhilarating and a huge leap in our society as a planet.\n\nWhat I want to get off my chest is this: I love it. I love the hive mind, the good and the bad shit, the trolls, the psycho tumblr users, the wanna-be porn stars, the karma whores and every anonymous rambler. I love you because you are me, and we are all proving we're human as **fuck** on a daily basis. Lurking around here these past few months has helped me through a lot. Thank you for entertaining me, and teaching me about the human condition from the comfort of my living room.", "summary": "I look forward to being telepathically linked to all of you in future. And to being called a fag."}
{"id": "t3_4kivo2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with my BF [25M] of 3 years, gave me an ultimatum of counselling or breaking up. Has since refused to set up counselling.", "post": "We have been having our issues for a while, and while we usually do not have full fights over them, we do tend to get prickly with each other whenever things are unaddressed. Admittedly, we are both not great communicators. \n\nAfter our last real fight, he told me that we needed to go to counselling or we needed to break up. I agreed to try counselling. He has a specific group in mind he wants to go to, so I said to set up the sessions and we would go. This was over 3 weeks ago.\n\nSince then he's brushed off setting anything up, I can't set it up since I don't know the name of the only place he's willing to go to, and we're starting to bicker again. It's now at the point that if I mention something is wrong, or that I would have appreciated if X,Y, or Z had been done, I am accused of trying to start another fight. \n\nI'm at my wit's end here, am I being unfair for pressing him to do the thing he threatened to end our relationship over if it wasn't done?", "summary": "BF demands counselling, then refuses to set up counselling. Meanwhile, we're returning to our bickering and the relationship is suffering again."}
{"id": "t3_2dk1y3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 F] have an anxious feeling my new SO [25 M] may have domestic violence tendencies. What do?", "post": "I have been exclusive with my boyfriend for one month. It has seemed like a fairy tale thus far. He is extremely handsome, fit, doesn't drink/smoke, soft spoken, thoughtful, homebody like myself, supports his mother, and is extremely successful. He has taken me on trips with beautiful hotel suites and fancy dinners, pays me endless compliments, we always have a great time together no matter if we are watching movies or just washing his car together, and he has been there for me during some rocky times. It is the most exciting beginning to a relationship i have ever had.\n\nThere are some concerns though which make me wonder how healthy things are:\n\n1. when i googled his name, it came up with an arrest earlier this May for \"DV INV\" which supposedly means domestic violence. Not sure how to bring that topic up for conversation?\n\n2. He says he is not a jealous person, but i have noticed if i go out with friends, the next day he will hardly text me/not see me if we had plans. Seems like a \"conditional love\"\n\n3. He likes sex to hurt me. Granted this is not the entirety of sex, but maybe 10% of the time, and he stops when i tell him.  I'm understanding of kinks, but i do know this can be a warning sign.\n\n4. He has already told me he wants to marry and have children with me. (granted i've fallen for him, and these things sound wonderful to me too)\n\n5. His father was physically abusive to him and his mother until he was 7 when his mother fled to the US.\n\nIt is very well possible i am being overly cautious as i do volunteer for a domestic violence organization, combined with the fact i feel like this is too good to be true and i don't deserve something so perfect. Where do i go from here? Do i discuss my concerns/his arrest or try to hold back so i don't get hurt? Am i being a crazy person for getting this \"feeling\" that he may abuse me?", "summary": "I have had a \"feeling\", which is new to me, that my SO is capable of domestic violence based on very loose leads, how should I proceed with these concerns?"}
{"id": "t3_19cmx3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Mindset for getting back together with an ex-girlfriend [21m] [21f]", "post": "My ex and i were good friends for 3 years before going out. We broke up up a little over a month ago and the reason behind the breakup was that I was a little too clingy and she needed her space. She claimed that the relationship was unhealthy which now that I look back it is very true. Fact is that I still am very much in love with her and I do want her back in my life but not so the same problem repeats itself. She initiated no contact. At first I was really crushed and confused but I realized that this is a good time to figure what went wrong and how to improve myself so this problem doesn't have to repeat itself. I'm at the point where I realize the relationship is over but now I want to build a better one for the both of us. We went out for half a year. At this point I can accept the fact that if she says no, I am going to respect that decision. Is this the right mindset to go about this or am I just crazy?", "summary": "friends with ex 3 years before going out and she left because she thought relationship was toxic. What is the proper mindset to win her back or am I crazy?  Went out for 6 months"}
{"id": "t3_1lhktt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (24M) found pictures on my girlfriends (22M) computer of naked girls sent to her cheating ex-boyfriend.", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nWeird situation and I'm not sure what to do. Quick backstory, my girlfriend and I have been dating about 4 months and things are going really well. She got out out of a bad relationship where her ex boyfriend cheated on her. As far as she knew it was only with one girl and that's it. They've split up and he's not longer in the picture, we started dating and things are going swimmingly. We're at our \"I love yous\" stage and have been intimate. \n\nRecently I was going through her computer looking for her resume she couldn't find, and I stumbled upon some pictures. They are nudes that were received just around and before the time they would have spit apart. So its possible he was sleeping with more than one girl , or at least messing around with.\n\nMy question is should I bring this up with her. He's out of the picture and it hardly matters now, but she probably has the right to know that things may have been worse than what she thought.", "summary": "Found pictures sent to my girlfriend's cheating ex of girls she doesn't know about. Conflicted on whether or not to tell herT"}
{"id": "t3_308tqq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by pissing outside", "post": "My apartment building has a very strange phenomenon where people will just sit in their cars for extended periods of time.  Why?  I have no fucking clue.  This one lady I know for a fact lives there and I see her every afternoon sitting there when I pull in after work, and still sitting there a half hour later after I take a shower.  The building faces the ocean, but these people choose to back into the parking spot so they are facing the building, middle of winter so it's cold as balls outside, and just sit there.  Doing who the hell knows what.  It's so weird.\n\nAnyway one morning I wake up and my roommates rockin a piss already.  It's one of those mornings where I simply could not wait 30 seconds for him to finish, I had to piss *now*.  I did the only logical thing and swung open the sliding door to the deck (that faces the parking lot/ocean) and do my business in the warm doorway, giving that dirty deck a nice golden shower. \n\nThis happened at 6:15 am.  Before I pissed everywhere I was careful to check out the lot.  Every single car was off.  There was no wind; it was silent. I was sure no cars were running.  I scanned each car individually and they all appeared totally empty.  Perfect, open the flood gates.\n\nBut as fate would have it, on the one god damn morning I decide to piss out the deck door, halfway through my business some lone motherfucker just swings his car door open and hops out like it's nothing out of the ordinary to sit in his car at 6:15am doing literally nothing.  I had my pants pulled down just enough to reveal just my dick; I don't even care if he saw it.  I cared more about cutting off the flow and not dribbling all over the inside rug for fuck's sakes.\n\nWhat the fuck though, does anyone else experience this?  People who live in a nice cushy apartment yet they will just... sit in their cars, regardless of the time of day?", "summary": "pissed out the deck doorway in front of presumed empty parking lot early in the morning before the sun was even up, one guy hops out of car out of nowhere and probably saw everything"}
{"id": "t3_2ys4gc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22/M] got stood up by my date [21/F]. Should I try again?", "post": "Last weekend (before our spring break) we had planned to meet on a Friday, but we re-scheduled for noon on Sunday as it was more convenient because we both had work to do.\n\nIn light of this, I didn't pick up an extra shift at work before going out of town, because I thought I'd be having lunch or whatever with this girl.\n\nWell, Sunday rolls around and it's noon, and I waited for a text but nothing. I waited TWO hours, still nothing. So I texted her, \"Hey what's the deal, are we getting food? If you're not ready I'm going to eat cause Im really hungry\". She says \"Go eat! I'm about to go on a run, and then run errands with [roommate]!\" wtf? \"So let's just plan for dinner, then?\" She never texted back.\n\nNow, this really pisses me off. Like, I set a whole day aside *planning* on meeting up with this girl. I don't care if you dont like me or dont want to go on this date with me, fucks sake just tell me instead of making plans and having them fall through.\n\nSo, yesterday I bump into her on campus. She says \"Sorry! I meant to text you but had to finish an essay! But I'll text you!\" I didn't really respond. An essay, at the start of spring break? I thought about going off on how it was rude to stand me up etc, but I didn't.\n\nSo at dinner tonight I was with a mutual friend and she said this girl, in all honesty, had forgotten to text me. She had forgotten about the whole thing. I've never done something like that before, not even with insignificant plans. It may just be me, but it sounds like a load of horseshit to me. \n\nLater in the evening I got a text from her. Should I ask her to hang out again, or just not respond and tell her (in my head) to fuck off?", "summary": "Got stood up by a girl, friend says she just forgot about the date. Texted me tonight, should I try again?"}
{"id": "t3_2ofnkh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO [23M] is extremely unhappy with his job. How can I [23F] motivate him to find something else?", "post": "My SO and I have been together for three years. During that time, he's had some trouble with jobs. He cannot afford to go to college at this point, and in order to go to school for what he'd like to do we would have to move about an hour away, (which, at this point in time, we cannot afford but are saving up to do so). \n\nHe's currently extremely unhappy with his job, so much so that he seems incredibly depressed all of the time. His boss doesn't listen to him, (he is in a management position), and also has been cutting his hours. I would love for him to find something else, but he feels like he any job that he would get would be exactly the same. He has issues with anxiety, and filling out job applications causing him so much stress that he seems to shut down. I try to motivate him to find something he likes, or anything that will be different from his current situation, but it's almost like he sees no hope in anything. \n\nI want to be supportive, I listen to all of the problems he has at work, and I offer suggestions to make it more bearable. I'm also doing my best to present him with other places in town that he could apply to. His unhappiness at work is affecting him so much at home that I just want him to be able to quit this job and find something else. We would like to have children one day, but ideally when he has a job that he is comfortable and stable in.\n\nHow can I motivate him to really push past his comfort zones and show him that better jobs do exist?", "summary": "My SO is incredibly unhappy at his job and sees no hope for any other workplace. How can I motivate him to seek other work?"}
{"id": "t3_192cuv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Coming up on 4 years, [25M] hates having to treat his SO [25F] extra special while not getting a lot in return. How can I get this point across without sounding \"unmanly\" or needy?", "post": "I am lucky in a few ways: I know she loves me, isn't money-grubbing, and is good in bed, which many will say is plenty, but really those are just the minimums for being a good girlfriend, aren't they? Shouldn't your girlfriend love you regardless of money and make you feel good physically? So those don't count.\n\nShe is often impunctual while I am not. If she's tired she makes me take her home, as though me having fun doesn't count. If we do stay out she sulks. If it's chilly outside she won't dress up because \"she's cold,\" and if she does I have to hear about it the whole time, like she wants to remind me \"look how much effort this is for you.\" Meanwhile I'm just as cold and keeping quiet.", "summary": "It comes down to \"Thing I Do Standard\" is the same as \"Thing She Does And Thinks Is Extra.\" Thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_3ghias", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [29] dad [66] has been seeing a woman [30s] for many years behind my mom's [58] back. My mom cannot drive, has cancer, and is house bound mostly. And I want to confront him.", "post": "So my dad met \"Jessica\" when he worked at a school. My dad used to talk about her all of the time. At the time my mom would get annoyed but would let him have his \"friend\". One day my mom found a secret email address he was using to talk to her and confronted him. He told her it was all innocent but my mom was suspicious as he could have easily just talked to her openly. \n\nFast forward to about a couple years later and he starts talking about a new girl. He at first gives her a different name. However it doesn't take long for my mom to figure it out that it's Jessica again. She confronts him and he says yeah but there is nothing between them.\n\nThen he retires last year from the school. My mom is relieved as he no longer sees Jessica daily. Well, it continues now in secret texts, pictures, and phone calls. He also has started tower her in his favorite \"fishing\" spots. My mom is now diagnosed with cancer, not working, and cannot drive. She confronted him again about it and explained to him how deeply it hurt her to see he is doing this. He agrees, cries, and apologizes. \n\nToday my dad woke me up and called me to drive me to the ER as he was by feeling well. When I took him in, he didn't bring his cell. He is having surgery, so I came home to check on my sick mom. Lo and behold, there is his cell phone. I open it up to check it and he has tons of phone calls back and forth with her under her initials JB. I told my mom but she does not want to confront him. I do. She is afraid because she needs him to take her to her treatments. I just want justice. What do I do?", "summary": "My dad is cheating on my mom and I want to confront him but my mom doesn't want to in order to be cared for during her cancer."}
{"id": "t3_3wvxez", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Odd payment request?", "post": "I'm unsure if this would be the correct subreddit, as it didn't seem to fit in elsewhere, maybe askreddit or legal? If not, here goes.  \n\nA little background, I'm in the military and looking to buy some car parts. I saw on the Perrin Performance website that they have a \"Military and first responder discount\" [reddit!] . To be approved for this, you need to email or call the representative listed with a few requirements and also list the parts you wish to purchase.  \n\nAfter sending all of this I received an email this afternoon statin all of the (newly) priced items at about 10-15% discount (awesome!). The email also includes the following text, which I found incredibly off.\n\n> If you'd like to complete an order, feel free to call or email me with your credit card number, expiration date, and 3 digit code OR send a paypal payment to sales@perrinperformance.com, just put it to my attention.  \n\nI shot the representative an email back asking if he could somehow give me a discount code equalling the amount of the discount I was to receive noted in his email, as it didn't feel right to do either of the options listed. I am also going to call tomorrow to see if he could answer some other questions I may have. \n\nI can't wrap my head around it being a scam, as it is from a reputable company, it just seems odd that the initial payment options listed were what he mentioned.   \n\nAny help or suggestions would be great, or maybe someone has used their discounts before? For all I know this is completely normal, but I've never been asked to send my \"credit card number, expiration, and 3 digit code\" to someone via email.", "summary": "want to buy car parts, inquired about military discount, received email back with discounted prices but asked to pay by email/paypal."}
{"id": "t3_280f0l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My best friend [25 M] and his [27 F] 3 years. Just got engaged and 1 year ago she tried to cheat on him with me.", "post": "Perhaps not the correct sub reddit in theory but I think it's perfect. I need advice from people in relationships whether or not people would want to know if their partner tried to cheat before they got married and how you would react.\n\nCircumstances:\n\n3 of us where out drunk and my best friend and his gf started having a huge fight. Massively awkward for me. She stormed off and we were in a rough area; she is small and petite so my best mate asked to me chase after her and make sure she gets in a taxi and home safe.\n\nWe walked chatted and got a taxi and she came on to me and was very forward.\n\nShe said something a long the lines of, let's go back to yours and I can stay over.I said no that's not going to happen and I awkwardly seen her home.\n\nHe has been my best friend or 14 years and I decided that it was best to leave it because who knows if she would try and flip the situation and lie etc. They were going through a rough time and honestly though it would have a natural end in the near future.\n\nShould I tell him now 1 year on?", "summary": "best friend and gf got engaged; his gf tried to cheat on him with me and I declined. How should I handle it?"}
{"id": "t3_44sur2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26F] fianc\u00e9 [31M] doesn't understand my anxiety issues! How can I explain to him that it's serious and not something completely of my control?", "post": "So, I've dealt with some anxiety/panic disorder issues since my college years. The worst of it was prior to me meeting him where I pretty much had a breakdown and started an antidepressant pill. \n\nI met him about a year after this and because of how well my life was going, and things were stable I decided to get off of the medication and test run how my anxiety was at that point. Well, things have been going pretty great until about six months ago when my medical boards occurred and other life changes to where my anxiety slowly started creeping back in and lately where I've been kind of going through some troublesome moments.\n\nNow, I don't like being on medication unless it is absolutely necessary and there's no other options or coping mechanisms for it. The thing is, he just thinks anxiety can disappear and truly doesn't understand it. His mother has severe anxiety so I'm just surprised he isn't more understanding of when I ask for space or react in different ways. \n\nHas anyone here been in a similar situation where your SO doesn't understand mental health? I'm pretty outgoing but sometimes certain situations/potential health scares will get me thinking and concerned and I can panic.", "summary": "Suffer with anxiety and my fianc\u00e9 of 3 years still doesn't understand my issues and how anxiety affects my life. How can I get him to understand it's not something in my control?"}
{"id": "t3_1ro2th", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my potential girlfriend [24 F] After two weeks, \"Reaching and Settling\" dilemma", "post": "During a game of \"Never have I ever\" the question of \"1-10 scale\" had come up. I gave her my honest opinion. I believed that she was an 8. She told me that she found me to be a 6 and a half. This actually threw me for a loop. I'm generally found to be fairly physically attractive by my partners. My question is as follows:\n\nIs this a relationship that's worth pursuing? In terms of sexual chemistry we seem to fall short. (She doesn't kiss with tongue or like what I like). Aside from that our personalities fit together very well. I'm just curious if this base level of attraction is indicative of problems in the future. If I'm not her type and she chooses to date me what kind of challenges will that bring up later? I do have to admit that I'm bothered by the fact that I (physically) barely meet her most basic requirements for attraction.\n\nAny thoughts/bits of advice?", "summary": "A girl and I met and like each other, but in terms of physical appearance I'm not her type. Is this worth pursuing?"}
{"id": "t3_3g35dp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31F] with my husband [39M] together 11 years. He used to have sex with me while I was sleeping and I can't get over it.", "post": "My husband (39m) and I (31f) have been together since I was a young adult and we have three kids. For a while, in addition to any other issues I might have had with him, he would only want to have sex with me after I had already been asleep. I would wake up to him fingering me or even as he was starting to penetrate me. Each time this happened I would tell him it made me feel terrible and please don't do it again. But he would still do it. His excuse was that he didn't know I was asleep and he thought I was into it.\n\nThere are some other issues aside from this, but generally he is a kind, supportive, encouraging person. He wants me to be happy. He never talks to be in a bad or mean way. Lately he's finally stopped doing the sex while I'm sleeping, but I realize I'm not really attracted to him anymore. In fact, when he kisses or touches me I'm almost repulsed. I feel horrible because he tells me how much he loves me and how good sex feels, I'm honestly not sure I love him anymore.\n\nAnyway, I guess my question to you guys is--Do you think I'm being ridiculous in letting this get to me as much as it has? I know we should do counseling, but we just can't afford the copay for each session right now. Is there anything I can do to get over this while we're waiting to go to counseling?", "summary": "Husband used to have sex with me while I was asleep, now doesn't. How do I get over it and make the marriage good again?"}
{"id": "t3_3fb0l9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by thinking Netfrix wouldn't be such an asshole", "post": "So I just started my new month yesterday on my cell phone plan. \n\nI decide to put on some Netfrix, but I'm currently without an internet connection. I didn't feel like using my phone to watch, so I decided to tether to my laptop and lower the bitrate to the lowest possible setting (Alt+Ctrl+Shift+S in my browser at least.)\n\nI only planned to watch one episode, but I ended up letting it roll on to the next.\n\n3/4 of the way thru the second episode I get a text saying I used all my data.\n\nI don't know what I expected, for some reason I suppose I just assumed, same session=same settings.\n\nFML I now have to go 30 days with the most shit throttled bullshit data. I'm blaming Netfrix, frankly it's the only Damn thing I CAN complain about with Netfrix. \n\nWell.. there is the fact that you can't transfer profiles across accounts... or that you can't delete items off your history without deleting the whole profile. Yeah see Netfrix is preeettty good... Fuck you Netfrix. You're not that great. Also the last season of arrested development was disappointing. My friends ps3 shows different thumbnails for the same shows on the same type ps3 as mine with the SAME", "summary": "I used all my data by thinking Netfrix would actually keep the bitrate limits I set in the same session."}
{"id": "t3_3nlgxt", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Uninsured and deep into hospital bill debt at only 20. Don't know how to tackle the debt. Also, I might have been scammed.", "post": "Hi, here is some background info on me.\nDue to my weight I have gone to the ER for the first time at 19 due to chest pain, and twitching(thought I was dying). The doctors said it was from stress, and that I need to learn how to not be so stressed out. Gave them my insurance info, turns out my insurance was obsolete, mom never informed me, so they billed me about $900. Ever since I have made an effort to try and pay off the debt, even getting a second job, and haggling to a lower monthly premium. Since then however I lost both of my jobs and was unable to pay it. Strangely, they just stopped taking the $75 from my bank account every month. \nIn fact, this has caused me to believe that I might have been scammed because...\nI called the debt collector Grace, she never picks up\n\n * They don't send me letters anymore about the debt\n* Every time I call she seems to be away* Once I called and they said she \"switched directories or w/e\"\n* They don't send me letters anymore about the debt\nI have also been sent another bill from the hospital. I was in a car accident and was hit from behind by a truck. Somehow I lived, but my spine has never been the same. I am nervous about paying this bill because of my experience from the last. I don't even think I can pay it off due to my other debts that piled up from me losing my jobs. I make $7.50 an hour, how can I pay off this money while affording to eat...??", "summary": "Might have been scammed when trying to repay bills, have more bills to pay and not making enough to pay them off, what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_256mrk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22 M] now ex-gf [22 F] slept with her ex 3 days after breaking up with me.", "post": "My ex and I were seriously in love. We dated for about 7 months. She has a troubled past and was hurt a lot by guys.  She wasn't ready for a serious relationship even though she wanted to be and ended it with me. 3 days later she sleeps with a guy she used to see before me. She says it's easier for her to have just a \"physical\" relationship than have both physical and feelings. Hard to explain.\n\nBasically, I'm just really struggling right now. I miss her and I still love her. I'm giving her the space she needs but she still says she misses me. I was starting to try to move on when she texted me saying she misses me. I care so much about this girl even still. I'm in pain but I don't want to lose her for good. Any advice or anything - thank you.", "summary": "My ex whom I love sleeps with other guy 3 days after breaking up with me. She still cares for me and I, her. I don't know whether to move on completely or still be there for her."}
{"id": "t3_3xx1qb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] think my sister [29/F] is irresponsible for letting her children [5/M and 9/F] stay up past midnight. What should I do?", "post": "My 29 year old sister is a single mom of 2 children. She recently moved back in with our parents. I am home from graduate school for Christmas break. I asked my 5 year old nephew yesterday what time his bedtime was and he said he didn't have one. I thought he must be joking. Then I witnessed for myself that they truly do not have a bedtime.\n\nLast night they stayed up until 1am running around and playing on their tablets and cell phones. I couldn't believe she let a 5 year old stay up that late. \n\nIt is affecting me because when they stay up late, they bother me all night long, coming into my room, wanting to play. She doesn't watch them. Half of the time, she goes to sleep and I am forced to stay up late watching them.\n\nWhat should I do about this? Am I crazy to think that a 5 year old and 9 year old should have a reasonable bedtime and not just stay up all night? I know it's Christmas break, but this is really annoying me. Is it appropriate for me to tell her that she needs to get them to bed at a respectable hour?", "summary": "29 year old sister let's her kids stay up late at night and annoy me all night long. What can i do about this?"}
{"id": "t3_29cte5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [Early 30's M] with my GF [Mid 20's F], 2 yr relationship, Hides that I am divorced from her parents", "post": "Been with a girl almost 2 years now. She finally told her parents we were a real thing. I asked her if her parents knew I was divorced (she and her mom are close). She said no, they can never know. They don't speak English, so I don't know them very well. \n\nHas me having doubts again. I don't like keeping secrets, and this is something huge to me. Not to mention it is a matter of public record, so it's not like you can actually hide it anyway. Makes me really uncomfortable. \n\nThis is on a pile of other things that make me think of calling it quits.", "summary": "GF hides the fact that I am divorced from her parents, says they can never know. Not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_175s4r", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Ex-gf started talking and flirting with me over Winter Break but now seems distant.", "post": "So my exgf[21] and I[20] dated for about 9 months last year then she broke things off over the summer. I tried following /r/breakups advice and starting no Contact which killed me to do but still remained friendly to her whenever we saw each other. Then I heard she dated a few other guys which killed me but still never lost my cool whenever she was around.\n\nOver winter break she broke no contact wishing me a merry Christmas and she just started talking to me again. I never initiated any of our conversations but she me if I was ok with us talking again and I said sure since I thought I had myself under control and really wanted to be friends. Then we started talking between 2-4 hours a day and went over why she ended the relationship. It was like we were dating again and I was tempted to remind her that we weren't. She asked if I was dating anyone and she made it clear she wasn't. Also she mentioned that seeing me during the last semester caused her pain which made her avoid me whenever possible. Then a few days before I went back I got a bunch of I miss you texts which kind of caught me really off guard. She mentioned how she wanted me to save her a dance at an upcoming dance and that we'd be spending a lot of time together over the summer if I stayed for summer classes.\n\nWhen I got back she made me dinner and invited myself and a bunch of friends out rock climbing with her. We also hung out a few times but our talking kind of slowed and now we havn't talked in 3 days. I'm worried I was just being used as someone to talk to when she was bored which is driving me insane. I plan to talk to her this weekend about what she meant over winter break and tell her to never do this to me again if she doesn't have any intention. I don't want to go through the pain again.", "summary": "Ex was being flirty with me over break but now that school has started up again she seems kind of distant. Thanks for any advice"}
{"id": "t3_pmpcz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Does the US gov't have the right to force tobacco companies to put warning pictures on their boxes?", "post": "I was reading [this article] about how the US government is trying to make tobacco companies put \"grotesque\" warning pictures on their cigarette boxes.  \n\nThe tobacco companies are saying that it's a violation of their first amendment rights to make them do that.  \n\nAren't there already other countries that do this?  It's been awhile since i've seen a pack of smokes outside of the US.  \n\nI also feel like that the majority of people know that smoking is bad for them and they still do it anyway.  So are the pictures really going to change much in that regard.  It's different from not being able to advertise, which is to get people to start smoking.  \n\nand if people are worried about the nasty looking pictures maybe I'm just desensitized to those things but they don't bother me.\n\nthe article also states that if smoking was discovered/invented today and the government knew about the health risks it would get pulled from the store shelves in a heartbeat.  i suppose you can compare banning smoking to prohibition, and i know drinking isn't good for you specially in excess but smoking is far worse.", "summary": "US is trying to put nasty pictures on cigarette boxes to get people to stop smoking.  tobacco companies say its a violation of 1st amendment rights to do so."}
{"id": "t3_3az7y3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by using my phone light to pee at work with the power out", "post": "So I'm in Jersey and we had some pretty bad thunderstorms and tornado warnings last night.  I get to work today, and the power's out.  I head to the bathroom and go into the stall to pee because our bathroom has no urinals, and I whip out my phone light to see.  Note there's a guy in the stall next to me pooping.  So I start peeing, all is well, I feel relieved - it's a long pee.  As I'm finishing, I look over at the ground and this whole time my light had been casting an enormous shadow of my pissing dick on the floor of the stall next to me.  Right at the feet of the guy shitting.  I get the FUCK out of there and now I'm looking around the office trying to think which of my co workers was in that stall", "summary": "Peed during power outage at work.  Phone light cast shadow of my pissing dick in stall next to me.  wondering which of my co-workers was in that stall"}
{"id": "t3_1pujs8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (28M) told my friend (25F) that I love her, she has blown me off", "post": "The story is more complicated than the title indicates, I'll try to keep it brief.\n\nA few months ago, my best friend drunk texts me that she's interested in me.  I tell her I feel the same way, but there are some complicating factors going on on her end.  We're in this weird limbo for a few months, and then about a month ago she tells me that she thinks it doesn't feel right and wants to just be friends.\n\nI was pretty hurt over it (especially because she brought it up).  We stayed in contact for a few weeks (against the advice of all my other friends).  One night I drunk texted her that I'm still in love with her.  This was about two weeks ago.\n\nShe didn't reply.  She's always good about replying to texts, so this is definitely intentional.  I texted several apologies the next day, as it was obviously a drunken outburst borne of hurt feelings and frustration, and asked if she could just ignore it.  She eventually texted me back a few days later, and her tone was very cold and distant, as she is known to do when she is pissed off.\n\nI give her a few days and then tell her that I'm sad that things are off, and I hope that things can go back to normal.  No response.  Eventually she texted me a couple nights ago, asking me something random.  I replied and asked her an equally innocuous question.  No response.\n\nCan someone explain to me what is going on?  How long is this going to continue for, we're at 2 weeks now.  Before all this happened, I told her that I was still struggling with it and she said that she couldn't imagine not having me as a friend.  She has called me her best friend on numerous occasions.\n\nIs she suddenly just done being my friend?  Do I just stop talking to her until she cools off?  Will she cool off?", "summary": "told friend I still have feelings for her, now she won't talk to me.  will she get over it?  what's a reasonable timetable?"}
{"id": "t3_2i8ze9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28 M] have been in a relationship with my girlfriend [28 F] for a little under a year. I come from a very large family and am very family oriented, my cousins are like brothers and sisters. She is not very close with her family. This is creating problems.", "post": "In our relationship, we have had a rocky Summer and it is becoming an even rockier Fall. There have been a lot of important life events happening between myself (grad school), my friends (bachelor party/5 weddings) and my family (observing anniversaries of deaths in the family). For her, she wants me to compromise in the relationship by not seeing my family so much. I live about 30 miles from my parents and often have family visiting town. She feels like I'm not compromising, since I am often visiting family or they are visiting me. My girlfriend and I spend every day together during the week, but on the weekends we share time as a couple with our friends or family. \n\nHer family lives far away and we have spent a few weekends to visit them. My family is very important to me and she makes me feel like they are a burden or an obstacle to our relationship. But I feel like she doesn't make an effort to get to know them or to get close with them which is something important to me. I've about had it with this argument because we have been going back and forth all Summer about it. Am I being bull headed? I'm thinking this could be a deal killer.", "summary": "For my gf, she wants me to compromise in the relationship by not seeing my family so much. However, I am a family oriented guy and I feel like this shouldn't be a big deal and could be deal killer."}
{"id": "t3_4jnqmn", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (F22) hooked up with a guy (M25) and am not sure what I could/should potentially expect now?", "post": "I'm in need of some advice! Disclaimer though, I know not everyone agrees with casual sex, but all that matters is that I am and that I am safe about it. Please no judging on that aspect :)\n\nThis last weekend while out I ended up meeting a guy and we found out we had some mutual connections,we danced, hit it off (both were drinking though) and I walked home with him to his place. He got my number before we went to his place.\n\nObviously, we hooked up and he said a lot of \"sweet\" things (like constantly mentioning that he loved what was happening and that he really liked me a lot - I know that can't be entirely true though as we only had just met). After we were done, he kept mentioning that sex with me was the best and I said that I should probably go home as I didn't want to overstay, but he told me not to worry and to spend the night.\n\nIn the morning, he kept on cuddling up to me while we were both awake and we kind of just lingered in bed for about an hour because we both weren't feeling 100%. I was going to walk home, but he insisted on driving me, so I let him. There was just small talk in the car about plans for the day (what we were each doing) and about how we both didn't even plan on going out the night before.\nBefore I got out of the car, he double checked to make sure he got my number.\n\nMy question I guess is - do you usually hear from guys like this again? I guess because of the cuddling in the morning, and some comments he made during the night and then the checking to make sure he got my number are throwing me off a bit. I know this very well could be a one night stand, but what do you think from a listeners POV? It's only been almost three days since I last saw him.\n\n(", "summary": ") Hooked up with a guy, he was nice, not sure if there's a chance I could hear from him again or was he just being nice because he felt like he had too"}
{"id": "t3_52so7q", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU getting into the car.", "post": "I appear to have lost the ability to car door today.\n\nWent out to the shops a few hours ago to drop off some bottles for recycling and buy some sweet, sweet Pepsi. Now this is an activity I perform on the regular, so you'd think there would be absolutely no room to fuck *this* one up, wouldn't you? Yeah, that's what I thought too.\n\nThe world, however, thought otherwise.\n\nSo as you do, I place my newly acquired colored sugar water into the backseat, shut the door and prepare to place my body into the front seat. This, however, is where I apparently lose the ability to door, a thing I have done countless times before with no detriment or harm to my person whatsoever. Grab handle, open door--\n\nOne thought promptly manages to enter my brain case: \"Bloody hell I think my head just exploded.\"\n\nYes, I manage to open the door right into my forehead. Not only that, but once I flop into the seat like a bag of particularly pained bricks and inspect the damage, I find my rent flesh is currently attempting to paint the rest of my face bright red.\n\nAt least I wasn't driving and the Pepsi is safe.", "summary": "Bard is a klutz who managed to open a door into his face and split his forehead open. Here, observe."}
{"id": "t3_1otp3z", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Initiating casual-- but not cheap-- relationships. Suggestions?", "post": "Hi all,\n\nI [30M] am at a bit of a transitional point in my life at which I intend to move out-of-state in about a year's time.  I am also finally at a point where I feel I have emotionally \"moved on\" from a previous long-term relationship.  These two factors combine to form my desire to meet and have a relationship with a woman, though simultaneously keeping things necessarily short-term-- I am clean-slating this out-of-state move and I'm not trying to take a relationship with me (if it happens, so be it, but that's not the target I'm aiming at).\n\nThe problem is I don't really know how to do this.  I've always done either a high-quality committed relationship OR 'one night stand' type of hook-ups.  I don't have much interest in doing the bar-pickup 'one night stand' scene at this point just because-- at my current state of person-- it takes a little more than just biology to get me into a girl enough to want to sleep with her.  What I'm trying to achieve is to maintain a casual relationship with a woman that doesn't feel cheap to either side.  I'm not down for misleading.  I'm not down for sleeping with a woman that I can't at least enjoy conversing with during non-sexual time.  I haven't had much luck in the past because the few women that I felt I had this kind of set-up with told me in the beginning that they were okay with the arrangement, only to actually end up wanting a greater commitment as time progressed.\n\nSo...is there anyone out there who has had this work out well?  Am I chasing a phantom?", "summary": "I'm looking for advice on how to achieve a short-term relationship that doesn't feel completely cheap/unfulfilling."}
{"id": "t3_4wi360", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] Is this a normal value to want from a partner, or am I just being prude?", "post": "Hello all! So I always had this mindset even growing up in puberty and stuff that I wanted a partner that didn't have a history of hook ups or one night stands. I never cared at all the number of partners a person had inside of relationships (Unless it was like a huge number of relationships for my age, then that would be a concern in itself.) but the hook up thing never seemed to fit right with me. I personally always seen sex as something intimate and exclusive, but I always made sure to be supportive to my friends and anyone else and how they wanted to share their bodies! I know people can have a one night stand and still have intimate sex with someone they care about. But I guess I just want someone who values sex for a relationship, like me. \n\nSince I'm supportive of other people i'm not dating, and don't care about partner count inside relationships am I still being prude for wanting this? I guess the reason for doubting myself so much is because as a gay male a lot of the community is hook up culture, and I feel prude for even having the desire of wanting someone with these values. But on the other hand some people only want to date Catholics, or save sex till marriage, so it almost doesn't seem unreasonable what I would like.\n\nUltimately do you think its reasonable to look for this in a partner?", "summary": "Is it prude or unreasonable to seek a partner that doesn't hook up or have one night stands if those are the values you want to share in a relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_2ackon", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] have finally asked out a girl [23 F] I work with. We get along great, but I'm having trouble maintaining my confidence around her because I think I might be intimidated by her.", "post": "I have been working with Stacie for about 5 or 6 months now. We have been talking more of the past couple of months since I was moved to the same position as her. A couple times we have spontaneously gone to a movie or had a few drinks after work, and she's also hung out with me and my friends a couple times. \n\nSo I finally forced myself to ask her out and actually acknowledge it as a date. I think she had fun. I did. We make each other laugh a lot. \n\nBut the problem is I overthink everything. I talk to much. She makes me an idiot. I don't know if it's because she's slightly older than me (all my other interests have been my age or slightly younger) or if it's because I actually have my first googly-eyed crush I've had in a long time. \n\nIt's like there's a wall that's preventing me from being fully comfortable around her because I'm so worried I'll say something stupid. All other girls I've gone out with have always gave me clear signals and mostly made moves on their own, and I've always been able to easily being open and myself. With Stacie, she definitely does not broadcast her interest in me, I have no idea what she's thinking, and I'm shit at making any kind of gesture towards intimacy. I can barely look her in the eyes, it's dumb and I know it's dumb, but I cannot break through that wall. \n\nThis has never happened to me before. I know she likes me and we're going on another date, I'm just worried I'll continue feeling this way.\n\nMy thoughts are all over the place. Let me know if anything needs clarifying.", "summary": "Finally took/taking out girl I have a huge crush on. I know she likes me, but I'm overthinking everything and can't force myself to be open and comfortable. How fix?"}
{"id": "t3_1tzxs4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32/M] dating [27/F] 2 months, probably disagree on having kids.", "post": "I [32/M] have been dating a new lady [27/F] for the past 2 months. We recently had the \"define the relationship\" talk, which resulted in her becoming visibly upset and tearful when she found out I don't ever want to have children. \n\nWe met online, where she contacted me first. My profile clearly states that I don't want children, while her profile was ambiguous with an answer of \"maybe\". \n\nWhile it may seem early to discuss children at this point, my past two long term relationships have ended because my partners wanted children. It's important for me to be as upfront as possible about what I want in a relationship to avoid any confusion later. \n\nAfter our conversation, things have gone back to normal for us. We still see each other several times a week and have regular sleep-overs. I'm really confused where we stand on the whole relationship question. Is she sticking with me hoping that I'll change my mind about having kids? Is she just viewing this as a short-term relationship? Is she thinking about what she really wants and just needs time? I've never had a \"define the relationship\" talk that didn't result in either a relationship or a parting of ways.", "summary": "New lady seems to want kids, while I don't. Not sure where this leaves us in terms of relationship status."}
{"id": "t3_4stfv7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] not sure what to say to my gf [18F]", "post": "Some backstory first, when I was younger (14-16) I wasn't really a \"good\" kid. I was smoking and had a lot of friends who were in gangs or that were beating people up for money. And at some point one of my friends took me with him to one \"job\", I didn't know what we were doing because at first he only said he needed some help but I realized later when I entered a dark street that something was going down. So we did that \"job\" and fro  that point on my life changed completely, I started helping as many friends as I could with the fights and they were asking for help because I can hold my own in a fight (trained mma for 5 years). Just a little clarification, when I said beating peopme up for money I don't mean robbing them. Whenever someone that we knew wanted to beat a guy or more up he called us and after it was done he would give us money.\n\nNowadays I'm completely different, at 16 I moved to another country and I realized how bad I was falling and how lucky I was with the moving. When I think about the things I've done I'm disguted and hate myself for it but that won't change anything. The only problem now is that 3 months ago I've started talking to a girl and we've been together ever since and last night someone from my past decided to make a joke and write to her on facebook that if she knew everything she wouldn't like me anymore. She told me about the message and she is supposed to come over tonight to talk about what that means. I'm afraid that if she learns the truth she is going to break up and I don't want to lose her. Should I tell the truth or should I just tell her that someone was just making a joke", "summary": "I used to beat people up for money and now I'm different and not sure if I should tell my girlfriend the truth after someone wrote to her."}
{"id": "t3_1srkma", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] would like to start a relationship with someone but I don't think he [23M] could see past our differences?", "post": "So a little back story. When I was a freshman in highschool I had a friend who was senior. He was nice guy and I kind of had that weird old brother type feeling for him. We shared a few classes and we always had a great time at school. Well, he graduated and started college, we added each other on facebook but never really talked outside that. Recently he's been hinted that he's like to take me out on a date sometime, which I would really like, but I'm afraid he wouldn't be able to see past our differences if he knew how different we really were.\n\nNow, he really doesn't know much about my opinions on things because I'm a little quiet, he however is constantly posting his opinions on facebook, so I know them all too well.\n\nI guess the biggest difference it religion. He's catholic and it's a huge part of his life. I've been an atheist since I was about 14. Now for me personally this isn't a huge deal. My last boyfriend was religious, and we simply avoided the subject, but I'm thinking that this guy is just a little too... uh... devoted to just brush it off.\n\nHe's also constantly going on about being pro life and anti gay marriage. He's started several 100+ comment flame wars by being so forward with his opinions. I'm very pro choice, and my believe that everyone deserves to be happy in regards to love. Again, not a big deal to me personally. You believe what you believe, and no one can chance that but you. Again though, he's not like that.\n\nOther than that though we have a lot in common and both obviously are attracted to each other. I'm just wondering if you guys think it's worth it to try and start a relationship.", "summary": "I'm wondering if it's worth starting a relationship with someone who doesn't exactly see eye to eye with me on some important topics."}
{"id": "t3_1wvniv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my boss [34 M] does he like me or does he like having power over me?", "post": "So here it is. I have a boss who is helping me get a promotion. We spend alone time together and have often talked about personal issues, like family history and childhoods. often getting into personal and vulnerable issues. \n\nThe issue is that he has a long time GF who has told me he is not crazy about. he brings her up from time to time. She wants him to get married and have kids. he wants neither. he said he might just stay because he doesn't like change. he tells me he's lonely, even though she lives with him. \n\nBut he also listens to me... a lot... he thinks about things i say, and he remembers them. (i'm not sure if he does this with everyone). he has also watched my back in the office and does his best to support me and make sure i get my promotion. he offers tons of advice. sometimes our conversations are moody. I often confess a lot of personal things to him, and he will sometimes do the same. it feels very personal and intimate. these conversations can be dark and intense. sometimes those emotions are clearly written on our faces. He has also asked to spend time (getting lunch) with me out of the office. I have never done this with any of my other bosses. \n\nthe other day, i tried to help train a fellow employee and was being kind and nice to the employee. and my boss was upset with me. he lashed out (which he's never done) and asked me if I was bipolar and how i had changed to become such a different and happy person (in front of the new trainee). he then recoiled and withdrew. he asked me to leave his office.\n\nI like my boss. he's taken, but i feel a closeness to him. how can i tell if he is into me - or just likes having a sense of authority and mentorship over me? is there any way to tell ??? \n\nplease help. any advice is helpful. thank you !!", "summary": "think i have sexual tension with my taken boss, but i can't tell. not sure how to approach or what to ask to find out."}
{"id": "t3_1b3oqp", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25/m] How to break up w/ Mental Fragile Person [28,m]", "post": "Please give me some advice. I've been with my current bf for over 2 years. Things have not been good quite a while, mostly on my part. I have regrettably stuck by it for all the wrong reasons. I did not want to hurt him, I usually need a big push to make a serious change, and I am afraid of what would become of him if I ended it. He does not have strong relationships with people other than me, he is very co-dependent, can show aspects of depression and anxiety, etc. For the 2nd time in our relationship I have discovered that he has been exchanging dirty messages with other people. I forgave him the first time because I blamed myself for not giving him adequate attention, plus I still corresponded with my ex against his wishes. This time I cannot look past it, mostly because I am looking for a way OUT. I need to end this relationship for my own mental and emotional well-being. Nonetheless I can't help, but worry that he might hurt himself if I leave him.", "summary": "How to break up with a depressive and co-dependent partner. Additionally, what, if anything, can I do to prevent him from potentially hurting himself if I end it. Any words of advice can help."}
{"id": "t3_1askev", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "At what point is lack of sex a reasonable cause to end a relationship? (25M, 27F)", "post": "I'm 25 and male, my girlfriend is 27. We have dated for over a year and a half and we don't have our own places so it's relatively rare to get a chance to fool around, maybe once or twice a month. She's a virgin (though had two previous boyfriends in which she had manual and oral sex), and the handful of times we tried to have vaginal sex she would ask me to try repeatedly but immediately cringe and push me away because of the pain. She insists she doesn't have any kind of medical problem, and always eventually says we will try again next time.\n\nThis is my first proper relationship and I don't want to just throw it away since I have no idea how long until I'm in another. I also don't know how common this kind of problem is but by now this aspect of the relationship makes me angry. I don't see how I could  explain that she needs to start having sex and enjoying it, or break up. Also I'm worried about feeling that if the relationship is ended I'll feel that I've wasted time hoping the negative things would sort themselves out. Just yesterday I found out that a female friend I was attracted to started dating someone else which bothered me more than it should have, from the sense that doors are closing.", "summary": "1.5 year, first relationship. Fooling around but no sex. Increasingly frustrated but don't want to be a dick by breaking up because of sex, and don't want to hurt her."}
{"id": "t3_37or0g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18 M] girlfriend [19 F] of over 1 year often feels alone when I'm gone. How do I help?", "post": "My girlfriend is often lonely when I'm not around and it doesn't help that she doesn't have any close friends anymore. She's the kind of person to latch onto one close friend, but unfortunately she doesn't have those friends anymore (most of them weren't great people so she grew out of those relationships).The problem is that I am the one she latches on to and I'm not always around. She wants friends of her own to be able to hang out with when I'm busy or with my friends and she also wants to get into some hobbies again. This all sounds pretty good, but she's pretty terrified of people\u2014especially girls\u2014and she's overly critical of her abilities, leading to her quitting out of intimidation.\n\nHow can I encourage her to pursue these things or what kinds of advice can I give? I've been really working on not blaming recently and I feel like saying \"you need to do this\", \"you need to do that\", blah blah, might make her feel less motivated. She used to really be into writing and I told her I'd write some stuff with her (even though I'm trash). This, she said, will give her some confidence in her writing again. My worry is that she'll just end up relying on this so when I'm not around she won't find joy in it anymore.", "summary": "GF no friends/hobbies but wants them. Need to prevent archetype of sad wife that waits for husband to get home. How to encourage without being an ass?"}
{"id": "t3_1pua2n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19m) want to meet a (18/19f) but am not sure how to approach...", "post": "I am currently in university, and this one girl has sat near me all semester. I didn't notice her until a few weeks ago, and finally decided that I want to talk to her. \n\nIt's a fairly large class, but no one sits next to her (the guy who used to sit next to her dropped the class, I assume). \n\nHere is my only problem. Would it be creepy to just sit next to her? I was contemplating on just walking up and asking \"Hey, do you mind if I sit here?\" I'm under the assumption she'll say yes; we have made eye contact a fair amount and when a girl who sits behind her asked me a question, she seemed to perk up and stared right at me as I spoke.\n\nEven if she does say yes, what would I even say? I haven't noticed anything I could really comment on, as that seems to be pretty common advice. She dresses fairly simply (jeans, black sweatshirts and stuff). I'm fairly confident when people are talking to me, the only problem I have is actually starting a conversation. \n\nI guess my main question is, how do I go about talking to her? what are some good ice breaker questions that I can use to ease into more conversation and get to know her better?", "summary": "Girl sits near me in my class at uni and I want to sit next to her. If she's cool with me sitting there, what can I say to break the ice and jump into conversation? thanks!"}
{"id": "t3_2qrjhj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my Date [18 M/F] 3 months, is it the right time to ask her to be my girlfriend?", "post": "Okay so I've been dating this amazing girl for about 3 months. We see each other at least 2/3/4 times in a week and I am pretty sure of what I want with her, and I know that she feels the same way... However I am not sure if its the right time + I don't know what to do in relation to asking it... We both live in NYC and new years eve is coming up and she wanted to go watch the ball so I figured that it would be a great time to make such request. What should I do?", "summary": "Wanna ask my date(3months) to be my girlfriend but don't know if its the right time. What should I give her? Would it be nice to ask her to be my girlfriend on the new years eve?"}
{"id": "t3_3yht45", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "I bought a puppy from a puppy mill. [Help]", "post": "My best friend has been looking to get a dog for sometime now. She has always had huskies, and was ready to get another, as her last dog had passed away a year ago. \n\nAfter careful talking and collaboration with her, we decided that as a \"Christmas gift\" I would pay for her puppy. I am normally against the puppy for Christmas thing, but she wanted a puppy, the time of year just worked out like that. \n\nI have 3 dogs myself, all rescues, I wasn't overly familiar with the process of buying a dog. But I know enough to know that I did in fact end up supporting a puppy mill. \n\nThis pup is a husky, he cost me $350, which is insanely cheap for a husky puppy (Sign #1). The \"breeder\" wouldn't let me on the property to see the dogs (Sign #2). The breeder also had no organization, no contracts, no vet records, no health certificate, nothing. I know I shouldn't have gotten the dog from him. I supported a puppy mill. This poor pup is stained with pee and feces. \n\nSo why did I do it? I was so caught up in getting my friend a husky, which again she knew about, that I looked past my better judgement. \n\nNot to mention, upon meeting this guy to pick up the puppy, I was alone. I had gone to meet him before with my boyfriend and he said he was fine because we were meeting in a public place and he didn't seem weird last time. This time I went alone, he didn't speak much and kept staring at me. After I paid for the dog and took him he told me to give him a hug, being scared I did. Stupid, I know- but I didn't want him to get angry, he seemed a little off. I didn't know what he would do. Nothing happened, but I feel so stupid for putting myself in that situation.", "summary": "I knowingly bought a dog from a puppy mill in order to make my friend happy, but looked past my better judgement and put myself in danger as well."}
{"id": "t3_4tvi36", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "My cousin crashed my boyfriend's car, need help.", "post": "My dad, mom, my boyfriend, and I went to LA for the weekend so my dad offered to help my boyfriend find somebody to leave his unused car to (we live in bad area and the street cleaner sweeps daily so we had to leave the car somewhere else.) My dad leaves it with my cousin and tells him repetitively to just leave it outside his house and keep an eye on it. He gives him the keys and off we go. We're in LA and we receive a call from my cousin that he crashed it against another car (he fell asleep on the wheel) and my boyfriend's car got completely destroyed and towed. My boyfriend had just taken out the car out of his insurance because he was planning on selling it (he doesn't use it) and now we don't know what to do. What are my boyfriend's best options? My dad is willing to take the blame since he gave the keys to my cousin. My cousin doesn't have a car so no insurance, but his wife does.. So IDK. my boyfriend is panicking that they're going to arrest him and whatnot, he has no idea what to do. He doesn't care about the loss of the car, just doesn't want to get in trouble. So what are his best options?", "summary": "cousin crashed boyfriend's car when told not to use it, no insurance on both sides, we were out of the city 7 hours away. Don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_507hxp", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Double standards", "post": "throw away for obvious reasons.\n\nMy[23M] gf [24F] of 3 years has some trust issues from being cheated on in other relationships and has huge problems with me hanging out with girls when she isn't there. She however hangs out with guys but thinks that is okay. I have no problem with her being around other men as I trust her, I just want her to treat me the same way. \n\nI have talked to her a couple times about it and only recently got any traction by using a hypothetical situation for myself that was the same situation she was in the night prior (stayed at a female friend who lives with a few guys). I got her to realize the double standards but she just says that she thinks that other girls are going to try to sleep with me whenever I go out. She says it's not me she doesn't trust but other girls. This over the last few months has been worse and I can't figure out how to make her realize that she can trust me.\n\nJust for some background I have never cheated on anyone and have never given her a reason to think I would. Also, I fully trust her and know she has never has/would cheat on me.", "summary": "Girlfriend isn't okay with me hanging out with girls but doesn't see a problem with her hanging out with guys."}
{"id": "t3_2rsi85", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my boyfriend [30 M] of 9 months, hurt and I don't know what to do.", "post": "Sorry for the long post. I'm really hurting right now and could use some advice or wise words.\n\nTo give a brief background, my boyfriend and I have been dating for about 9 months. He's a physician in an intense fellowship program and generally very stressed/tired/busy, I'm currently in school, and stay pretty busy with an internship and working. We spend almost everyday together, support each other, have a lot of fun and both refer to the other as our best friend (that we enjoy touching inappropriately.) \n\nFor the first couple months we were very happy together. The issues didn't start until I brought up the dreaded question, \"So what are we?\". Then began a bit of a struggle. I always wanted more from the relationship and was greeted by hesitancy, by 3 months I asked for exclusivity and he eventually agreed but only because I was going to leave if he didn't (I wanted something serious.)  by 6-7 months I said I love you, he didn't say it back. This is totally fine, painful, but fine. I said I'd be patient with him until he is ready.  He still hasn't said it back, but now at 9 months he said that he feels like he is falling in love, but isn't in love yet. This progress has given me hope, but not being on the same page has made me feel a bit insecure about our relationship. \nHe has mentioned that he doesn't want to fall in love unless he knows that we will have a serious future together, so he doesn't get hurt like he did in his 2 prior relationships. :( \n\nWe have been fighting a lot recently because: I still haven't met his family (they live 5 minutes from him), he doesn't want to share our relationship on Facebook (not the biggest deal!), he isn't in love with me, we don't really talk about the future, and the quality of time spent together isn't the best due to the nature of his work and how stressed and tired he is all of the time. After expressing my concerns about these things, he said he doesn't want to lose me and will try to open up to me. The fighting is really getting to us both.", "summary": "Basically, I need to know if this is a lost cause and if I'm being foolish for staying with this man. OR if I'm making a mountain out of molehill,and should just chill out? "}
{"id": "t3_tmsx7", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "We didn't have a bad breakup, but I'm having a hard time avoiding my ex, and I'm not sure I want to.", "post": "I'm 24, she's 25. We broke up a couple months ago after a 3yr relationship. It was a mutual decision. I think we loved each other very much, but weren't really in love anymore. I don't regret breaking up, it's been hard, but I feel more like myself than I have in a while. Still, its hard having my best friend ripped away from me. There were no hard feelings during the breakup but I feel like it would have been easier if there were; then at least I could convince myself to dislike her or not wish her well.\n\nA large part of the problem is that we share almost all the same friends. We've unofficially split them up as far as hanging out on a day to day basis goes, but we're both still really good friends with all the same people. Two birthday parties we're both invited to are coming up, then a wedding we're going to together since the invite came before we broke up, and another wedding later in the summer.\n\nAs it is I ran into her randomly last week, we hugged, said a couple words and parted ways, and that was enough to completely break me down. I miss her so much. I know I need to separate and be able to heal, but I honestly don't see how I can do that without abandoning some of my friends, and even worse, there's a large part of me that wants to be able to go hang out with her.", "summary": "Every time I see her it's painful, and I don't know what to do without ceding my friends to her."}
{"id": "t3_1szk0s", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "So, you don't want to change lanes so I can merge", "post": "Yesterday, I was accelerating on the on-ramp, reaching the speed of the flow of traffic (~70 mph, ~110 kph). I look in my mirror to make sure I'm clear to merge, and sure enough there's an 18 wheeler in the lane and isn't moving over. I start blowing my horn, but he doesn't even acknowledge me. At this point, I realize the on-ramp is ending and I have about 500 feet until it ends. I slam on the brakes to reach 50 mph (~80 kph), merge lanes as the on-ram is ending. I gain some space between the truck and myself, then move to the left lane and pass him. I look in the rear-view mirror and see the vehicle thats in front of the tractor trailer is going about 5 mph (~8 kph) below the speed limit. The tractor trailer moves into my lane, at which point I slow down to the speed of the vehicle the 18 wheeler was trying to pass. Once I slow down, the tractor trailer turned his blinker to move back into the right lane; I then sped up and the 18 wheeler turned off his blinker. Once it went off, I slowed back down and then the 18 wheeler turned his blinker back on. This went on for a couple of miles, until my exit came up. In retrospect, this definitely wasn't the safest thing to do but road rage got the best of me. And damn, did it feel good.", "summary": "18 wheeler doesn't move over to let car merge, ends up getting stuck behind two cars going 5 mph under the speed limit"}
{"id": "t3_28kr18", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Looking for input regarding [Invite] timeline", "post": "Hi Weddit! \n\nFH and I have decided on 9/19/2015. We're starting to get more of the details hashed out have come to a cross roads with standard invitation etiquette. \n\nOur guest list is \"large\" (200ish) but includes 80+% family. Most of the family is my side, which is convenient since my parents' house and yard will be our venue. \n\nFH has suggested that we send out the formal invitations soon-ish. About a year in advance. Similar to how STDs are traditionally done. This would have the location, date, etc. We're eager-beaver early planners, so we have lots of these things set in stone already.\n\nHis logic is that our family will plan around it and will know whether or not they intend to come. And that there's no point in waiting to send the invitation if we have a plan.\n\nWe would ask for RSVPs via our website on this formal invite. \n\nCome 2 months before the actual date, we will send out \"reminders\" similar to STDs with the basic details. We wouldn't send them to the people who RSVP'd no.\n\nThis makes a lot of sense to me, but I feel like there's a standard in place for a reason, and if this was so much better, it would already be done.\n\nWhat do you guys think?", "summary": "FH wants to send formal invites for our Sept 2015 wedding now, ask for RSVPs, and then send reminders a few months before."}
{"id": "t3_1b98jp", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[24m] Out on a limb here", "post": "So my gf (21) and I have been dating since last November. It's been interesting to say the least, as we're both almost out of college, and our universities are an hour or so apart. At first we managed to see each other once or twice a week. Things were busy but great. Lately though, I can't get her to talk to me. At all. I'm a theatre technician and she's a performer so our schedules are always busy, especially on the weekends, so I understand that she can't talk much since neither can I. But I can't get more than a single text message in any given day. Phone calls go straight to voicemail. It's been this way for about a month now. I trust her not to cheat on me, but she has been active on Facebook like normal, and still texts my friends. I know nothing is going on with those people because, well, they're mostly gay. Short of sounding crazy/bitchy/clingy, I don't really know what to do.", "summary": "Girlfriend of a few months in a semi-long distance relationship suddenly cut communication with what appears to be specifically me. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3dw5n1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (f/29) am a widow and I'm not sure I'll ever want to date again, but my parents (m/f/60s) keep pressuring me to remarry.", "post": "Long time lurker, first time poster. \n\nI have married my high school sweetheart right after college when we both were 22. We've been married for 3 amazing years and dated for 6 years before getting married. He died in a car crash not long after our 3rd anniversary and his 25th birthday. \n\nI've been widowed for 4 years and I completely lost any romantic and sexual interest in other people. My husband was my first and only and I have no desire to change that. I feel comfortable this way, and I would prefer to stay like this because I have a happy and fulfilling life that I enjoy. \n\nMy parents, on the other hand, don't understand that and insist that I should get married before I'm too old and have children. I've tried telling them that that's not what I want but they so not seem to listen, telling me that I can't stop living just because my husband is dead. \n\nHow do I deal with them?", "summary": "Lost husband 4 years ago, at the moment have a happy and fulfilling life, but parents insist I can' the happy without another husband. How do I deal with them?"}
{"id": "t3_2tsl9m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M27] have been seeing my girlfriend [F32] for four months. Did some snooping on her phone and found questionable messages... Help please?", "post": "My girlfriend has a lot of guy friends, some of whom she has had sex with, others she hasn't. There is a guy friend in particular she always speaks fondly of... I'll call him Chris. She has assured me before that he has never slept with him, that they are simply good friends. \n\nToday I committed a no-no and decided to snoop on her phone. I've told her previously that I would never look through her phone, but I had a funny feeling and chose to break my promise.\n\nA few days ago I had told her that I may be working out of town for the weekend. Apparently she texted Chris and told him that I would be leaving town for the weekend, and he should come over one of those nights and \"watch a movie or just hang out, lol.\"\n\nOne thing to note is that I've never actually met this dude. She is just constantly texting him.\n\nI'm sitting here, confused.I've always trusted her, and I don't want to jump the gun and assume the worst. It could be that she wanted to hang out with him just as friends, and knew that the best opportunity would be while I'm busy out of town... But it seems incredibly shady.\n\nAny advice? For me to confront her would be admittance of me snooping through her text messages. I understand that she's friends with him, but how crazy would it be for me to text a female friend and ask her to come over some night when my girlfriend is out or town? I would never do that.", "summary": "I broke a promise and snooped through my girlfriend's phone... She tells a male friend to come over some night while I'm out of town"}
{"id": "t3_539r20", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [23m] use her [21f] for sex?", "post": "Went on a date with a girl I met off a dating site. She wasnt engaged much in the conversation at all and it felt like pulling teeth the whole time. It got even worse when she asked me what I do for a living and I told her im in landscaping. At that point she spent almost the rest of the date playing around on her phone. \n\nWe walked out of the restaurant together (I paid of course, not even an attempt on her part) and she noticed that my car is a brand new charger hellcat (80k car). All of a sudden she put her phone away and was 110% interested in everything I had to say and asked me how I could afford it being a landscaper. I informed her that I own my own business.\n\nClearly this girl is not relationship material. Im frankly disgusted by her behavior. But shes hot and I wouldnt mind fucking her a few times before I cut contact.", "summary": "Went on a date with a gold digger. Should I fuck the gold digger a few times before I cut contact?"}
{"id": "t3_1uk8zh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it wrong for me [26 M] to feel uncomfortable that my gf [22F, ~1 year] is hanging out alone with her guy friend that most likely has feeling for her?", "post": "We have been together for almost a year now, but currently we are in a LDR. She moved away for school. She used to hang out with this guy friend who she said that she has a hunch the guy might have feeling for her, but he was her good friend. I didn't mind her hanging out with him and I really do trust her. She came back for a month during the holidays. Everything was great.\n\nShe went back last week, and on the first day back, she made plan to have lunch with the guy friend the following day. They went for lunch/brunch, hang out, go tea shopping etc. Again she said that she is pretty sure that he likes her. I told her that I am uncomfortable about this. She said that she absolutely has no feeling for him. I don't think its wrong to hang out with a friend, but I feel uneasy with her hanging out alone with a guy that has feeling for her, which might give him hope. She has many other good male friend and she do hanging out with them alone from time to time which I don't mind at all. This dude is the first one that I feel uncomfortable with.\n\nWe end up having a bit of a discussion. She said she will not be hanging out with him alone anymore because she does not want to risk the relationship. I told her that I really don't mind her hanging out, although it feel uncomfortable, and asked her to be careful, and not to lead him on without knowing.\n\nIs there anything else I should bring up with her??? Is it insecure of me to feel that way?", "summary": "LDR gf start to hangout with a guy friend, he probably has feeling for her, I feel uncomfortable, told her, discussed, she said she won't be hanging out alone with him anymore, conflict feeling..."}
{"id": "t3_15i5et", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(18/m) Hey guys, I really like this girl (19/f) but I don't know what to do next.  Do y'all have any idea?", "post": "Okay guys, I'll try to keep this short.\n\nSo, I've known her / liked her (I REALLY like her) for about 3 months now. We see each other quite often outside of class. I've only been alone with her a couple times: once, we went to dinner because everyone backed out, and another time we had coffee (she brought a girl friend, FML, but she left reasonably soon.) Both times, we had an awesome time. The conversation was fast, fresh, funny...I had her laughing at all of my jokes. And we relate in so many ways. She's really confusing though. She'll text me, seeming really sweet, act like she really wants to talk to me, etc. and then just stop talking to me / act like she doesn't care for absolutely no reason. IDK what's going on.\n\nThe reason I haven't made a move yet is I always thought there was someone else (turns out it wasn't). She mentioned a cute guy she talked to but I don't think that's going anywhere.\n\nFinal note: I asked her what she looked for in a guy. She pretty much described me to a T. She's looking for a nice guy, and I feel like I'm really sincere, and would be really sweet to her. I really want to; she's dated some jerks in the past who really hurt her, and I just want to be with her and make her happy. I have every other characteristic she listed. Is my luck just that bad, or....?", "summary": "I like a girl who seems to, and should, like me, but she's confusing. I don't know how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_1vpo4g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] been together with my girlfriend [19 F] for 9 months, my mind feels so clouded all the time", "post": "Alright, so as the title says we've been together for 9 months. We live several hours apart, not enough for it to be considered long distance but far enough away that we visit eachother during the weekend, and also stay the entire weekend. We usually also see eachother one day during the week, when one of stays the night. \n\nI must add that this is my first actual relationship, and my girlfriends second serious one. \n\nNow since a couple of months, my mind feels so clouded whenever we're apart and I think of my gf and/or our relationship. I don't know how to describe it that well, except for that it feels like a slight unease, and other than that the only way to describe it is just clouded. I can't make much out in my mind, so to speak. \n\nWhenever we're together things are good, no feelings of unease and not really clouded, except when we argue (just the cloudedness, no unease). Whenever we argue and I try to think of an example of something or something like that, my mind feels so clouded and I can't think of much at all, similar to feeling pressured or a lack of confidence (this is nothing my girlfriend is causing, even when we argue she doesn't pressure me or anything). But honestly, other than that, when we are together everything's good. I'm not sure what's going on. I'm very happy with my girlfriend, but this unease and cloudedness sometimes put a damper on that and makes this relationship feel kind of... heavy, those feelings are tiring.", "summary": "Whenever we're apart, my head feels clouded in regards to my girlfriend/relationship,  and I sometimes feel some unease ( perhaps due to the cloudedness?). What is causing this and what does it mean?"}
{"id": "t3_1clsru", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is mean't by \"Make sure you keep in touch\" in response to possible work opportunities?", "post": "I'm a freelance producer/videographer/editor and recently collaborated with a major national radio station. All the producers involved commended my work and were very pleased with the outcome. One producer (from head office) emailed me: \n\n>Make sure you stay in touch, we have plenty of video projects over the year, it's always good to know there is a reliable pair of hands in town and keep me posted on what you're up to.\n\nand another producer (from my city) emailed me:\n>Shoot me through your resume and clips. Let's sort a time for you to come in and have a chat.\n\n>I can't promise you any work or a job but I can tell you how to get work at [NAME]. The fact you produced this for us on a deadline and that my bosses have seen that is a great step towards that.\n\nSo I have email my resume and what not to that one producer but whats the next step for me in \"keeping in touch\" with the other? What do I update him with and how often?", "summary": "Producer said to \"keep in touch\" in regards to possible work opportunities, but what do I keep in touch about?"}
{"id": "t3_107ged", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/f] Boyfriend is (23/m) said I looked too skinny. Should I be offended?", "post": "This morning my bf found a picture of me on my computer from this summer where I was wearing a bikini. I wasn't in the country this summer, so he wasn't seeing my body every day.\n\nI blushed and was a little embarrassed, more or less playing coy but not really ashamed that he found a picture of me like that (I had intended to send it to him since we were apart for so long).\n\nThen he mentions that \"I almost look too skinny\" in the photo. This makes me angry, and I still am a little bit because A) I felt like I looked really attractive there, and B) I'm taking a \"dirty\" picture for him and he responds with a critique. Also, his comment set off an alarm in my head that there's a skinny threshold in his mind that I may have been crossing. Given that I'm a size 10 and 5'11'', I'm not fat by any means, but I'm at least 20 pounds away from being \"too skinny\", which is bullshit anyways.\n\nWhen we talked about it he said that he didn't mean it like that, but when he tried to say what he did mean he couldn't really explain it in a way that wasn't offensive and just kept saying he didn't mean it, he finds me so attractive, and that wasn't the first thing he thought of when he saw the photo, etc. A part of me was trying to justifying it by thinking that maybe he was just trying to make me feel good about my body by emphasizing how \"skinny\" isn't necessarily attractive to him (I've told him I put pressure on myself to look like that before), but that's not how it came across. \n\nOverall, I just feel confused because what he thought was \"too skinny\" was actually quite normal. It was an odd comment for him to make, and as soon as he said it he realized he had put his foot in his mouth. I guess I just don't know if I'm being over sensitive.", "summary": "Boyfriend finds a recent photo from this summer, says I kinda look too skinny, and I feel trapped in a double bind and oversensitive about the issue."}
{"id": "t3_2gube5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my x-gf [22 F], in love with her, had a chance to get her back but fucked it up.", "post": "So I was dating her in college, and then things kind of dwindled apart. A year later, we start talking... we both sort of realize we still love each other. I live on the west coast, she lives on the east coast. She comes to visit, it's fantastic, she wants to get back together, but I don't really fully emotionally release because we're not together. She takes that as - I just wanted her to come visit to have sex and have no interest in dating again. I don't know how to respond to that and I'm unsure we should get back together after spending 3 days together, and so we stop talking for like 3 weeks. Now it's 3 weeks later and I'm kinda going nuts because i had a shot to have her back and I realize too late how much I love her, basically i fucked it up. This has happened before, so she will probably hate me if i just tell her I want her back....what do i do?", "summary": "X-gf wanted to get back together, I wasn't sure, now I want to and it's 3 weeks later without talking"}
{"id": "t3_2g4tpf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] dating [27 M] for a month - really like him but not sure where it's going, started to see other guys but feel guilty?", "post": "I've  been seeing someone I really like for a month - we've been on 7 dates and it seems things were progressing really well. Last weekend he canceled plans the day of our date which threw me and I couldn't do the days he suggested to reschedule on, so I think it came off I was blowing him off. I didn't phrase it well and it was over text. I reached out Tuesday to mend the miscommunication that happened - turns out he did think I was miffed - and we are talking again though not as often as we had been. I'm worried this one blip threw us off course. We haven't made plans this weekend as he has friends coming into town. As its a male and female group I thought hed invite me to hang with them but he hasn't. As I'm not sure if he is feeling it anymore, I've made plans to see other dudes. We have had no exclusivity talk. I'm just worried though he or a friend of his will see me out with a guy and he'll be angry. But at the same time I really don't know where I stand with him. And don't feel ready to bring exclusivity up to him where we are after these past few days.", "summary": "Dating guy for a month but not exclusive - worry he is losing just interest, going to start dating others again but don't want to hurt him?"}
{"id": "t3_40umx4", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By not looking at my drivers license closely for years.", "post": "So I am flying to orlando florida tomorrow for family wedding and originally my family was going to pick me up from the airport to go to the wedding. However there was a bit of a problem/mix up on their end and now I have to get from Orlando to the wedding site.  I am 28 years old and have rented a car on several occasions and it isn't that big of a deal.  Fast forward to me attempting to book said rental car and I pull it out of its little flap which I never do and I come to find out that my license is not only expired but expire by about 9 months.  I have used that ID for months for alcohol, flights, everything without one word said to me once. Not only that I have been paying car insurance this whole time without a word from the insurance company, thank god I am a decent driver.  Now I have to figure out what the hell I am going to do once I get to florida. It doesn't look like there is anything like a shuttle and it would be prohibitively expensive to get a taxi.... Maybe I just play dumb and hope they give me the car... I've really screwed the pooch on this one.", "summary": "Had to make a last minute car rental, look at Drivers license and find it has been expired since April and nobody including my insurance company has said a thing.  Lets see if the rent a car place is as lax... fuck."}
{"id": "t3_35130h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22F] found some questionable things on my boyfriends [26M] laptop.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year and a half now, and living together for a year. We haven't had many issues apart from one big one (even longer story) and this. \n\nWhen he was with his ex girlfriend I know he flirted with other girls because he wasn't happy in the relationship, but that doesn't really excuse his behaviour. \n\nWe just moved recently and I have been looking for a job so I was applying to them today on his laptop and had to download my resume and when I went to open it saw he had naked pictures of some girl downloaded (no clue where from). I don't really have an issue with him looking at porn but I don't really want to see it, especially since it's always BBWs and makes me really self-conscious since I am trying to lose weight. \n\nBeing as upset as I was finding that I looked through his downloads and found a video he took playing with himself that I had never seen before and he had not sent to me. I confronted him about it and he said he didn't send it because he didn't like it. I asked to look through other folders and his phone and found he had more photos of himself in a locked folder most of which were never sent to me. Again, he claimed that he just didn't like them so didn't send them. \n\nWithin the last month or so we haven't really been spending much time together so he's had a lot of time to himself, I noticed he had downloaded a bunch of apps when he was scrolling through one day but didn't think anything of it. \n\nMy issue is I don't know if I believe that he just doesn't like this photos. The naked pictures of another girl bugged me a bit but the fact he had these and the video was in his downloads file seemed a little odd to me. I feel like he may have sent it to someone else but I don't really know what to believe right now. \n\nAm I being irrational thinking this? I don't know what to do because now I feel like I can't trust him and question everything he is doing...", "summary": "Found some naked pictures and a video of my boyfriend on his laptop and phone and not sure how to feel about it."}
{"id": "t3_15gpd7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (F23) deal with my friend (F22) of 20 years copying me?", "post": "I have been close friends with this girl for 20 years, I love her to bits and above all else I value her friendship. For as long as I can remember she has copied me; I know that they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery but it can really get me down sometimes.\n\nIt has got to the point that I'm having to lie about where I bought things from or that I don't remember just so she won't go out and get it. I can wear an outfit one day, see her the next and she will be dressed almost identically. Not only does she buy exact same clothes and shoes, she will copy my hairstyles, jewellery, make-up, and even bought the same car as me. I can even mention in conversation that I want something and she will go out and buy it before I have the chance.\n\nI feel like my identity is being taken away from me, it's like I'm being cloned and I'm really struggling to be flattered any more because it has been going on for so long. Does the issue lie with me? How can I move past it because I don't want to lose her friendship.", "summary": "Lifelong friend copies **every** aspect of my life. After several years, I feel like I've lost my identity, and don't know how to deal with it."}
{"id": "t3_3mregw", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[Discussion] My dog seems sad, need some ideas/advice. More information about what's happening inside...", "post": "Hello fellow dog lovers,\n\nI have a 3 1/2 year old male Lab mix (have had him since he was a puppy) about 9 months ago my husband and I rescued another dog. We got a male 6-7 year old Lab mix. Fast forward 9 months my two dogs bonded so well! Better than I expected. Now, last week we had to put down our 6-7 year old dog unexpectedly. (That's another long story) Pete (he is the 3 1/2 year old) seemed to handle it okay. He was a little sad for a couple days but my husband and I gave him extra attention, walks, and play time. \nSo Pete seemed to handle that change alright. Well now, today my husband moved out (another long story, we are in the middle of a trial separation). \n\nSo here is my dilemma.... Now a lot has changed, I am having to develop some new routines for Pete. Half his pack has dissapeared in a very short time. I am also very busy right now. I go to school 3 days a week and also work 2-3 days a week. So Pete is also having to adjust to being home alone a lot more.\n\nHe is a very well behaved/trained dog so he isn't doing anything negative while I am gone. He just seems...sad and kind of mopes around. I feel really bad for the guy. So much has changed and I know dogs thrive on routine.\n\nObviously, I am also struggling a little with everything that has happened but I am trying to stay strong for my dog and give him more than normal attention. But it doesn't seem to be enough. \n\nAny help or ideas would be amazing!", "summary": "My dog has lost half his pack in a short amount of time and seems very sad. Need ideas on how to help him."}
{"id": "t3_2tqdwi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My grandmother passed away, and I am on the other side of the world. Not sure how to consider the situation. [24M]", "post": "The funeral is in just over a week and I'm not sure if it's better to attend or not.\n\nI was home over Christmas just to see her since it was clear that she was not going to live for much longer, so I did get the opportunity to say goodbye in person. I am studying on the other side of the world and just got back two weeks ago. Uni is in the middle of the summer break right now, so at least I won't be missing out on anything in that regard if I do decide to go home for the funeral.\n\nIt is a very long journey - about 30 hours each way - which is quite exhausting. The cheapest tickets I can find are around $2K since it's on very short notice. I'm slightly worried that going back will leave me jetlagged and unable to be as present as I should during the ceremony and family gathering afterwards. If it ends up this way, it seems it will be more stressful and depressing than what I would get back for it (mentally speaking).\n\nRight now I have no idea if any of this matters in the bigger picture, compared to attending the funeral service. She is the first person this close to me who has passed away, so I can't really tell if being physically present at the funeral is a big deal to me or not. While this could appear slightly self-centered, I don't think she would have wanted me to go if it is too inconvenient and stressful, and funerals are for the living, so it doesn't feel wrong to consider it.\n\nDue to the inherent time pressure of making a decision - I would have to arrive at least a day in advance if it is to be meaningful, after all - I don't feel like I will be able to assess my options properly (I'm not able to think very clearly right now), so if anyone here has been in a similar situation, I would appreciate your input.", "summary": "I'm not sure whether going home for the funeral is worth it. Input from people with similar experiences would be appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_2py1kt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my S.O. [25 M] who says he will always have a thing for this friend in his life", "post": "Background: My s.o. and I have been together for 9 months. \n\nBasically, there is this girl he met in college. They were really good friends but there was a lot of moments things could have happened or that he wanted to happened but they never did. And, all of this happened before me. However, I have slowly been learning more about her and he made this comment that she will always be a problem but certain things wouldn't have allowed it to work out between them. They still communicate infrequently. \n\nI'm not worried about cheating but it's more about does someone really want to be with me kind of concern...So, I am just wondering people's feedback or opinions on the situation. Do you think it's something I should play out or is this a red flag?\n\nThanks in advance ya'll!", "summary": "Friend in his past that he thinks will always be a problem. Not really sure how to take it. Opinions?"}
{"id": "t3_47jej7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20/F] with my Mom [38/F], I failed a class and am scared of being thrown out", "post": "This is my first time posting so I apologize if this is messy.\n\nBasically, I'm in my last year of college and am supposed to graduate this April. The thing is, I failed a class. My professor purposely failed me in order to hold me back because of her personal vendetta against me. This personal vendetta was rooted from the fact that I was one of the students who filed a complaint against her. She verbally abused many of us in the class (we have recordings and transcriptions), hacked into our class' PRIVATE Facebook group to see what we say about her and used that to threaten us after. We took legal actions but the case got dropped, did not even reach the University President's office for that matter, because of her status and connections.\n\nWe'd try to complain again but she already failed five of us and the others are scared she's going to do something to hinder them from graduating too.\n\nMy dad and I tried talking to her, asking for some kind of compromise--but she was unrelenting. She didn't change my grade, which I didn't deserve. I wanted to complain more but she's in a higher position and has connections and everything.\n\nAnyway. I failed a class which in turn restricted me from enrolling two classes I need this semester to graduate. Which means I'm going to have to endure another year of school. My dad already know of this, he was really accepting. But I'm scared of my mom because she still doesn't know. She's actually looking forward to my graduation already, asking me when is it. I can't tell her the truth because she's really strict when it comes to my grades. I'm 99% sure she's gonna throw me out and have me live with my grandma's once she knows the truth.\n\nNow, I don't know what to do because it's already March and everyone else is telling me to admit it to her already but I'm scared of the consequences. Everything is going to change and I'm just so.", "summary": "I'm not gonna graduate this year; Mom is looking forward to it and might throw me out when she finds out. I don't know what to do, please help."}
{"id": "t3_t75hq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should i feel selfish for feeling this way?", "post": "Background Story:\nFor the past 6 months my best friends sister and I decide to start dating. Ive been friends with her too, we've known each other since we were kids and hang out all the time. So in all, we have known each other for 10 years. There is an age difference between us (her 19 and im 25). I see her as an equal maturity wise, hell shes more so than I am. We have seen each other at our worst, we always laugh and have a good time. Plus, we didnt feel comfortable dating other people because we didnt have as much fun as we do with each other, hence why we both decided to see where this would go. \n\nNow to the issue:\nI hardly hear from her. We are both so busy with college and working, we just see each other on the weekends. I work about 50-60 hours a week along with being a full time college student. She works like 20 hours and is also a full time student. I always find time to ask her how her day is and how shes doing, but she never asks how im doing, even randomly or after I ask her. I dont see myself as \"needy\", I dont feel like I have to talk to her every second of the day. A few weeks ago she had an allergic reaction to something and had to be taken to the hospital. I found out about it via facebook. Alot of the times I find out whats going on through her mom. Hell when we are together in person, everything is alright. Ive talked to her about it saying \"well, just let me know whats up from time to time.\" and she agreed (this was before the trip to the hospital). Shes admitted this is the furthest shes been in a relationship.\n\nAlso, I feel like if I asked her to let me know whats up or see how things are going is like asking someone to care. I think caring should be common knowledge, and not bound to how much dating experience you have. It only takes a couple seconds to type out a text message.\n\nThanks ahead of time for the advice.", "summary": "Girlfriend does not let me know how she is doing or ask how I am doing, Doesnt know whether to feel selfish or not"}
{"id": "t3_sbrg8", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Use of recordings in Canada for an academic appeal", "post": "Hi r/legaladvice! I'm having a hard time pinning this one down. Basically, I was in a meeting with a university professor and his administrative assistant for a course I'm taking. I put my phone in front of me for the meeting and recorded it, but did not tell the others in the meeting I was recording it. We're now in the middle of a dispute and I'm considering appealing this course.\n\nCan I use the recording of the meeting in my appeal? The recording was taken for personal notes, and also, to be honest, I was worried the prof might change his tune after the meeting. He's known for saying one thing and doing another. I haven't found anything about this in the appeal process yet, so I've started looking into Canadian Law, but I'm having a hard time figuring it out for this instance.\n\nAny help would be much appreciated!", "summary": "Want to use recording of an in-person meeting for an academic appeal, but I did not tell anyone at the meeting I was recording. Can I use it as evidence?"}
{"id": "t3_2q9zul", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my boyfriend [19M] of 2months has a gaming habit.", "post": "I tried to start a convo with the boyfriend everyday but it seems to be making me a little depress because he's always playing video games than paying attention to me. I'm not trying to be an attention but it's seems to be a bad habit of his. I don't know what to do or how to even confront him about it. Any IDEAS?", "summary": "How can I get my boyfriend attention and tell him that I'm really hurt because he is ignoring m...? Also he really means a lot to me and I want him to understand the same way as I do for him."}
{"id": "t3_4yli2w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30F] with my fiance's aunt [50sF], Her son recently passed away and I just found out she may be attending my bridal shower. Should I/How do I address this sensitively?", "post": "One of my fiance's cousins passed away from cancer about a month ago. He was only 27 and while it wasn't sudden, his mother (fiance's aunt) was his main caretaker at the end and I can't imagine how much pain she must be in.\n\nThat being said, I heard through the family grapevine that she may attend my bridal shower this weekend. Obviously this is a happy time for me and my future husband - we are also expecting our first child! I was going to reveal that at the shower too only...\n\n I haven't seen her since her son died and it is *so* recent that she must still be in a lot of pain. I'm sure she doesn't want me to make a big deal about it, but I also feel like I can't just not acknowledge her son's passing.\n\nWhat - if anything -  should I say to her when I see her? I want to tell her how sorry I am for her loss, but I also don't want to cause her any extra pain.", "summary": "My Aunt-In-Law just lost her son and I don't know what to say to her - or if I should say anything to her when she comes to my wedding shower/surprise baby announcement."}
{"id": "t3_2uk744", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex (21F) had sex with someone else while we were talking about getting back together. Now I (22M) don't know what to do.", "post": "So, my girlfriend (21F) and I (22M) broke up about a month ago. We still talk everyday and we have been talking about getting back together although admitedly I had been a little distant because of school and work being a little overwhelming. We go to colleges about two and a half hours apart which is pretty much the only reason we broke up in the first place. Anyway, yesterday, she told me she had sex with someone else while drinking on Saturday night. I got some of the details, and it crushed me. She told me she felt terrible and that she still loves me and that it meant nothing to her. So I asked her to come visit me next weekend so we could talk about it.\n\nI talked to a friend of mine about it and he said if I want her back, then it shouldn't matter what she did. But that just seems like terrible advice. My question is, am I being too much of a push over if I take her back? Or should it not bother me since we were broken up?", "summary": "My ex had sex with someone else while we were talking about getting back together. And now idk what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1yv13b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] have a crush on [18 F], don't want to scare her off.", "post": "We are both seniors in high school, and in the same friend group. However, we have never been close friends. She asked me to the last formal dance, and it was a ton of fun, but I'm not sure if she has any feelings for me. \n\nShe is super innocent, despite being absurdly pretty has never kissed a guy, so it's hard to tell if she's interested in that sort of thing at all.\n\nI'm considering asking her on a proper date to make my intentions clear, but I'm worried it would kind of freak her out. I'm especially worried because I really enjoy being a part of that friend group, and don't want to make things awkward or uncomfortable for either of us. \n\nShould I maybe try to hang out with her more in a group setting to get a better feel for it? I just don't want to miss my window of opportunity since I think we both had such a good time at the last dance. Help", "summary": "Like a super innocent friend, not sure if she feels the same way or knows how I feel. Don't want to scare her off."}
{"id": "t3_1w05ys", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Help, I know nothing about ferrets and now have two in my basement. Posted to r/ferrets but no replies yet.", "post": "Please read this. It's long. Reddit you are my only hope tonight. Forgive my hasty typing but I have had litter box house trained rabbits and know that setting a good precedent is important from the get-go. I got the ferrets two hours ago from a friend, getting rid of them because her boyfriend hated them. She seemed to have good intentions, however she didn't know shit about ferrets. Just like me. I know unspayed females can go into heat and it can cause a disorder that kills them. I asked if she'd spayed the female due to this and she laughed at me, said no, and told me she'd never heard of such a thing. Am I wrong? I'm flustered.\nHere are the facts: The female is a white black eyed unspayed baby (less than a year old) The male is a \"regular?\" adult one. 2 years old? She said he is unscented. They need baths. They are friendly.\nI want them to have free range of my basement and use a litterbox like my rabbits used to. I want to know how to train them. I like ferrets, I always wanted one, but everyone said \"They stink\" or thought they were creepy. I think they are cool...\nTheir cage was disgusting. I took it apart and put it in my shower and cleaned it. It's drying. The ferrets are running around in my empty guest bedroom. I gave them some toys and a blanket, and put a litterbox in two corners, (at first I put only one box in but found a ferret poo in the opposite corner?) and put out food and water. Please can you tell me what I need to know about getting along with these two critters? They also need baths but I have never bathed anything but a dog. I know I need to take them to a vet but I live in rural Wyoming and that is just not on option until next month. Rural Wyoming knows little to none about ferrets. Thanks for your help ferret lovers of reddit.", "summary": "Obtained ferrets, Need help understanding communication with them, need help caring for them, don't believe in cages unless it's necessary, can't get to vet until at least the 5th of feburary"}
{"id": "t3_v0dme", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "TL;DR Throw Away Time. Not advice, just feel compelled to share about an experience and hoping I'm not alone.", "post": "Throw aways get ready. Me and my best friend (males) were watching Brazzers beating it together. It progressed into stroking eachother. We agreed (during the act) this will never fucking happen again, ever. We will never speak of it. It will basically be the skeleton in the closet until the skeleton is dust and blows away in the wind. It did not progress into anything further. No anal stuff, no kissing, no oral, no part of this was out of attraction or feelings. This entire thing was purely out of curiosity. We both have girlfriends we are in love with (I feel my girl is THE ONE). Despite this experience, I would never consider myself bisexual or homosexual, the idea of another man is by no means enticing, tempting, or gets me aroused or excited whatsoever. As much as I would like to erase this experience completely, what's done is done. Nothing is awkward at this point, still buds, still do same old bro stuff (shooting, off roading, cigars). Curiosity was strongly present is all. Guys of Reddit, how many of you have \"experimented\" (to any extent), but your sexuality is not in question? \n\n**What's Going Through My Head Now**\nHonestly, I'm hard on myself when it comes to anything. Integrity is huge to me, and being integral in all of your experiences is also very important. Obviously not going to share this with my girlfriend, but at the same time, I share everything with her. Reddit, it would just help to know that this is normal, I'm not a freak, and that not sharing this with **ANYBODY**, including my girlfriend, is ok. I feel like I have to tell somebody and discuss it to get it off my chest, and Reddit Throw Aways is the only way I will ever do it.\n\nPlease share", "summary": "Buddy and I gave each other hand jobs out of curiosity, as far as we're concerned, it never happened. Have you guys experimented before?"}
{"id": "t3_4mnqnj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [30/m] being selfish in my relationship with my girlfriend [26/f]?", "post": "I live abroad and am dating a girl from the country I live in. I've been here for 3 years and we've been dating for 1. \n\nWe had an argument today about New Year's Eve, I know it's a long way away but we like to plan our travels in advance. I want to go home and spend it with my friends and family, I'll be home for Christmas which is great, but I don't get to go home very often (I spend about 9 - 10 months a year abroad) and I miss them a lot. She has a big problem with this because in her culture NYE is a very important holiday (more like Christmas) and she really want me to come back for it. \n\nHere's where I feel I'm being selfish: I'll be home for about 7 weeks this summer and she plans to visit me twice, it's going to be great and we have loads of stuff planned. She's spending a fair amount of money to come and see me (she also has to get a visa to enter my country). I live about 1,000 miles from home so it's not MEGA far or expensive. Because she's visiting me twice and I don't want to be back for New Years it makes me feel like I'm being a bit selfish in the relationship. \n\nSo she feels I don't care about her as much because I'd rather be at home for NYE. I feel quite guilty about this and I can totally understand. She's spending X money to come and see me this summer but I don't want to leave my country early to spend New Years with her, as much as I love her, I want to see my friends and family. I miss them a lot, I'll be spending Xmas with my dad but I might not have time to go and see my mum if I leave early. However this is a MASSIVE deal for her and she said she might even think of splitting if I choose to stay at home. \n\nI love her so much and she is such a wonderful, kind person, I don't want to put her in a bad light. This is a tricky situation though.", "summary": "I'm an expat and I want to spend New Years with my family but my gf really wants me to spend it with her abroad."}
{"id": "t3_1xhpb9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my good friend [22 F] of 3 years, wanted to get her and her friends small gifts Valentine's. That weird?", "post": "So Valentine's is around the corner and I found an amazing company that makes delicious chocolates and desserts. I wanted to by my friend and her close friends (who are also close friends of mine) each a small little gift as a gesture of friendship and to show that they do mean a lot to me. It would cost like $20 for all of them combined, so it's not like they are expensive. My main concern is I like one of our friends. My best friend knows already. I just don't want it to be taken awkwardly since this is purely a platonic gift. You all see any issues with this?", "summary": "I want to buy chocolates for my good friends as a friendly gesture since they mean a lot to me. That ok?"}
{"id": "t3_1961ko", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [17] wrong to be upset with my girlfriend's [17] lack of a drive to communicate with me?", "post": "Let me lay down the details here: we've been dating for three months. Nothing big, I know, but there's been some kinks thus far, and as the title suggests, the big one is the fact she has no drive to text or call first. I've always got to be the one who talks first, or ropes her into a conversation. Usually not an issue, because I'm a relatively charismatic kind of guy, and we typically have an hour or so of conversation daily.\n\nFor me, the kicker is that she just got back from a two week cruise without net or phone service, and has been in Texas for two days, completely able to say hello or tell me how it went. She hasn't. She's not said anything to me, and I've only found out that she was able to by her circle of friends texting her when I went to the theater with them.\n\nA'ight, I get it, I look a bit clingy, but I'm upset that she didn't even talk to me. We've gone half a month without saying anything to each other, and it sucks that she's zipped her mouth shut when she's got the chance to talk. So that's my case. Am I in the right to feel a bit hurt?", "summary": "Girlfriend got back from a 2 week cruise. Has chose not to say anything to me for 2 days. I'm a whiny bitch."}
{"id": "t3_yuayj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I want to move to new country - but to take my newly broken-up-GF with me [m/20]", "post": "I am not happy in the place where I live. I want to move to a new city, in a country not too far away (it takes <1h to fly there from here). I broke up with the girl I love for a month ago, for reasons I don't even really understand (i.e. that I am an idiot). We have been together for 3 years. \n\nNow I want to convince her to move with me, and that we move together. She has her friends here, where I have none. But we both love eachother. What is the best way to go around theese things? Has anyone else had a similar situation, what did you do and how did it turn out?", "summary": "I want to move to new country, and want my GF to take me back and come with me. Now wondering if anyone else has experience of this."}
{"id": "t3_n2om3", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "A Fickle old Flame", "post": "23/m 22/f\n\nBeen walking the line with a gal for 3 years now. She is a tough Gal to read, Avoids talking about feelings and presents a tough front. She liked me first and I didint see the signs. I ended up getting interested in a other girls, may have accidentally kissed her roommate...\n\nShe has dated other boys, some who I have known/ been friends with. After a break up she was about to take a semester abroad, we hung out and eventually kissed. Then we talked about some of the feeling from the past. She later kissed a friend of mine, She left for semester abroad and while there sent me some E-mails that were more sentimental then any of our previous communications\n\nI started dating a girl while she was gone and we lost a bit of touch. She got into a relationship as well upon return. We both got into break ups and have been talking again, \n\nWe have hung out, cuddled, held hands but no kissing/etc. She is still kinda on and off with contact and initiation. If she wants to see me its on, but if i want to see her its not a guarantee. I dont know if Im just holding on to the past, but I really do like her and always have wished we could have dated, but am I letting that allow her to use my emotions and attention.\n\nHow should I deal with this Fickle situation, also do you all think she resents me for how things happened in the beginning?", "summary": "Old flame which has been on and off, May be situated to relight it but signaling has been flaky as always."}
{"id": "t3_4ijlo0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22M] fantasized about an ex while having sex with my current gf [22F] and now my brain associates my current gf's name with my ex's. What do I do?", "post": "Hi guys, just wanted to know how I should go about handling this situation as it has really been bringing me down. My current gf and I have been dating about 7 months, and we have known each other for nearly a decade, and everything was peachy until recently. A few weeks ago my girlfriend and I were having sex and I fantasized about my old girlfriend. Ever since then, it's as if my brain can't distinguish the two as different people. Every time I say my current gf's name inside my head or picture her face, something in me brings up the name/face of my old flame. \n\nI really love my current gf, she is everything that this ex was not: caring, loving, loyal, reliable, sweet, selfless. I will do absolutely anything to give us a happy ending and make these thoughts go away. They have started infiltrating the time we spend together now as well, not just when I'm alone. It's like I'm fighting with my own brain. I do not love my ex and there is no future with her, even if I was single I would never pursue her again due to all the lying, cheating, pain, and selfishness. I have discussed this with my current gf and she's been absolutely amazing and is holding my hand every step of the way. I just feel disgusted with myself for letting this past pain poison my present happiness.\n\nSo help me out r/relationships, how do I get back to seeing my gf without bringing my past into play?", "summary": "Fantasized about ex during sex, can't separate my current gf  and ex within my mind despite them having very different character traits."}
{"id": "t3_1lnaw1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I tell my boyfriend I desperately need a night in?", "post": "My boyfriend(M24) is and extrovert and I(F23) am an introvert. We have been in a relationship for 2 years and have been best friends for 2 before that. He loves always having plans and hanging out with people, which I also sometimes enjoy doing but I also need nights where we can just stay in and watch movies or do nothing. Lately we haven't had a moment to ourselves. We are constantly running all over, hangin with people and filling our free time with activities. This week alone we have plans with friends every single night. I like seeing friends but it getting so exhausting trying to keep up with him. Last night I almost had a nervous breakdown at his parents house. This morning I almost had another and while trying to make me feel better I said \"I just feel like we are busy all the time\" and he said \"Life is busy, you're going to have to get used to it\". This caused me to start crying and frekaing out and it seems like he couldn't understand where I am coming from. Everytime I mention that I want/need a night in it feel like he he thinks I'm being lazy or don't want to hang out with his friends. I'ma afraid if I continue trying to keep up with him I'm to have a complete frekout. I don't know how much longer I can try suppressing these current mini breakdowns. How do I get him to see my point of view.", "summary": "Boyfriend is extrovert, I'm introvert. He always wants to go out and I need some nights in. How do I get him to see my side without thinking I'm lazy."}
{"id": "t3_feoif", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Am I being over analytical?", "post": "Since I've graduated college I find myself missing the 'day to day' of class activities. Being a History major and an English minor my analytical skills skyrocketed in my senior year, every assignment I touched involved thought and opinion - get your argument across while keeping the audience sustained and attentive. Please note that while I say this, I in no way mean that other majors or minors don't coincide with building their analytical skills.  \n\nThat being said, here is my issue. I've continued my analytical ways after graduation and into everyday life. Any situation that comes up within my realm of life I think \"hmmmm, here is an interesting situation - this point, that point - my resolution\". I pride myself in being as progressive as I can. I don't like sitting still while there is a \"problem\" to fix. However I can't help but digress and become condescending when I sit still droning at the television while herp de derping at MTV, TLC, or really any sitcom with my fianc\u00e9e. Although I view it as being directed at the show, she is taking my statements to heart and acting as though they are directed at her. This seems to be happening with everything, each and every aspect of day to day life - I always seem to interpret the problem as an overall picture that can be solved with simple steps.  \n\nThis problem seems to be branching off towards my friends too. Some situational drama will arise and instead of being passive or letting things play out naturally. I attempt to control that which I cannot. I try to tell myself that I shouldn't want my influence to reign supreme over others in certain situations, that they should lead completely within their decisions. Perhaps it is just human nature to push one's influence over another. However, because of my over confidence I appear condescending to those around me. This isn't my intention but it keeps happening!", "summary": "Reddit, what can I do to combat my situation? The question itself can seem contradicting given my statements above. How can I just relax, stop worrying so much and let events play out without constantly being controlling?"}
{"id": "t3_rk1tr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "College bound. Could I get some help/advice?", "post": "Hello. I'm a junior in high school and as you can imagine, I'm looking at colleges. I really want to go to Purdue for engineering and was wondering if you could tell me my chance of getting in, and any tips that might help me get in. I figured Reddit has plenty of wisdom about this kind of thing. Anyway, for some backround, I would be an out of state student wanting to live on campus. I have taken(including senior year) 4 years of English(English I-IV), 3 years of social studies including AP US Gov, 6 years of Math(Alg I/II, Honors Geom, Honors Precalc, AP Stats and AP Calc), 4 years of science(Physical Science, Bio., Chem., and AP Physics), 4 years of Band, some irrelevant electives, and 2 years of a foreign language(German).I have a 3.7 GPA. For my SAT, I got a 650 Math, 550 Crit. Reading, and 490 Writing. I'll be taking the ACT coming up pretty soon. ANYWAYS, some questions that I have. Does only having 2 years of a foreign language have a large affect on being accepted, should I retake the SAT, if I do better on the ACT should I send just the ACT or both, and finally what could I do to improve chances and what chance do I have on getting accepted with the above information. Thanks for any help! This is a big decision for me so any help at all would be wonderful.", "summary": "Want to go to Purdue for engineering. 3.7 GPA. Kinda low SAT score but solid academic cources. Chances of getting in/advice?"}
{"id": "t3_1q3qyc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[22 M] dating girl [20 F] for a little over a month, she has a competition coming up and I don't know how to comfort her.", "post": "I've been seeing this girl for a little over a month now, things have been going great! We have been texting frequently and seeing each other multiple times a week. \n\nWe are both extremely busy and dedicated to our school work, which I like, but she also competitively figure skates. So here's the problem, this week on top of tests/assignments/practice etc she also has a big competition that she has said she hasn't had a lot of time to prepare for. I have no figure skating experience, so I can't really feel her pain and I feel like I can't really give her legitimate support. Even worse, her schedule is completely blocked up this week so she can only text. It would be ok if I could see her to tell her it'll be ok, but I really don't know what I can really say texting trying to make her feel comfortable.\n\nAlso, since we started talking, messaging has been pretty consistent. But in the days leading up to the competition, she's been kind of short and dispersed with her communication. I've been giving her space and not texting because I know she's busy, and she's been starting conversations at night. Even though I know she's unbelievably busy, I can't help but feel she is being a little distant. \n\n---\n\nSo tonight is her big night. What the hell can I text her if she tells me she totally bombed her routine? \n\nAlso, do you think the distance could be because she's possibly losing interest? Or am I just paranoid haha. We have a date Monday after she's done everything, I plan on casually asking her about why she was being a little distant when we go out.", "summary": "Girl I've been seeing has a competition coming up on top of her super busy schedule. She's been a little distant and I don't really know how to comfort her."}
{"id": "t3_4owjf3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 2 years, preparing for a disastrous financial situation", "post": "Education:\n\nI am going to graduate this fall with a bachelors in Computer Science, with my girlfriend looking to graduate next spring with a bachelors in Food Science. She plans to get her masters in Business Administration starting fall 2017.\n\nFinancial Situation:\n\nShe needs to pay off her car with monthly payments, pay off student loan, and possibly her sister's financial needs. Her family may not be able to support her 13 year old sister, as the parents are getting sick. They might move out of country if they cannot work. I'm not sure when this can happen, so I'm really scared about the financial implications of my girlfriend suddenly becoming the guardian of her sister. She says that it will be ok and she will handle the costs of her sister, but I am just worried that we might not be able to fully handle this sort of situation. I just learned about the sister thing tonight and I am absolutely terrified. What can I do?\n\nFinancial Endeavors:\n\nI would like to be able to travel out of country with her by our late 20s, as well as start looking for affordable houses on the west coast. Ideally we would have at least $2000 contributed each year to our IRAs and saving regularly. I want us to be debt-free and financially stable by 25, at most. I definitely do not want kids, but that might change as I get older.\n\nAny help is extremely appreciated. Also, please do not just suggest that I break up with her. Thanks.", "summary": "Girlfriend, who hasn't even finished paying off student loans and car, could possibly become guardian of her 13 year old sister."}
{"id": "t3_vrfxn", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "27m Concerning my friend and his ex", "post": "So, my best friend and former room mate (25m) got dumped by his girlfriend (23f) after they dated for about 2 years.  I don't know the exact reasons why but then again I don't need to.  She moved across the country right after she ended it, this was approximately four months ago.  This past weekend she was back in town visiting and I consider her to be a good friend so I made sure to spend some time with her while she was here.  She was very excited when I saw her because she had gotten engaged the night before to her new boyfriend (33m).  \n\nSince it had happened so recently I was one of the first people she told and not many people know about it yet still.  So my question is, should I tell my friend about her new engagement?  He's still pretty upset about the break up, I feel like I should say something to him because I don't want him to get blind sided by a shitty status update or something insincere like that but at the same time I feel like it's really not my place to say anything since it's between them and I have nothing to do with it.  Should I just keep my mouth shut?  Am I making a bigger deal out of this than I need to?", "summary": "My friend got dumped, not long after that his ex got engaged, he doesn't know yet, should I tell him?"}
{"id": "t3_4ywptm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] don't understand how anyone can truly love another person. Is my definition of trust too far? Am I just being selfish?", "post": "My mom just told me that she hates me, and that all I've done is ruin her life. That she should've had an abortion.\n\nMy girlfriend of 5 years just left me because she \"didn't feel like it anymore\". All the happy marriages I ever see seem just so forced. I've never seen a relationship where the parties loved and trusted each other to the extent of which I expected in a relationship.\n\nAnd now that I know that a mother's \"unconditional\" love isn't even always as loving or trusting as I thought it'd be, I'm thinking there's something wrong with MY mindset. \n\nMaybe love isn't as great or intimate as I thought it'd be. Maybe that's just me being selfish. I don't think anyone would ever love me enough to feel like I should trust them back, especially after what's happened. And that's a bad thing.\n\nMaybe I'm just too trusting? That I always win the \"I love you more argument\" in a bad way? Maybe I need to care less about the other person and more for myself.\n\n Maybe in a relationship I need to care less about it, that trusting the other person is bad because they don't love me as much as I thought they did. Because a broken relationship hurts a lot more when you trust them a lot.\n\nI don't know what to feel anymore.", "summary": "I don't know if my definition of love is selfish because I expected a lot more out of a relationship of 5 years that just ended because she \"didn't feel like it\"."}
{"id": "t3_4yoac2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with dad [57M] and step mother [53F]. They told me that I'm receiving half the inheritance my step siblings will receive.", "post": "So a few nights ago my dad called me and he told me that he and my step mother are preparing their wills and he wants to talk to me about what portion I'll be receiving.\n\nFirst let's get this out there that this isn't about money. I'm a high earner and don't need a cent from them. And my dad and step mother are healthy as horses and I hope they'll be with us for 50 more years.\n\nSo he told me that they're considering 1/5 of the amount they're setting aside for children. My step brother and step sister (step mother's children) will receive 2/5 each. I asked why not 1/3 each and he thinks that will be unfair as my (stay at home) step mother has contributed a lot to the family and it's unfair if I'll be getting as much as her children. I asked if he has made half the contributions his wife has, as he's now giving me half but he does indeed think her children deserve more.\n\nI lived with my parents until I was 12 when they divorced, and my dad married this woman shortly after. I lived with my mom after that. I visited my dad regularly and have OK relationship with step mother and step siblings, but it's always fair to say I've been an outsider to that family. This decision just cements that. I wouldn't expect my step mother to include me equally as her own children in her will, hell I don't even expect her to include me at all, but I expected more from my dad. This just tells me he considers me half as valuable/wanted as his step kids.\n\nSo is it ok to be disappointed here?", "summary": "My dad told me I'm receiving half the inheritance that my step siblings are receiving. I'm feeling disappointed and not valued. Is that feeling alright even when I don't even need that money?"}
{"id": "t3_2v9028", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19M] girlfriend [16F] is envious of my past relationships. Not sure how to talk her out of it", "post": "Me and my girlfriend have been together for about 7 months now, and it has been a blast since the very first day. We basically went from rather good friends to an amazing couple without any awkwardness or friendzone-y (?) problems. Because of this, we are both pretty much convinced that we have found \"the one\".\n\nHowever, I recently learned that she is rather envious of my past girlfriends, my last ex in particular. As far as I can tell, her main concern is that I have been intimate in the same ways with them as I have been with her. She can't quite seem to grasp the idea that with her, everything is very much different. Sexual acts are much more meaningful, if that makes any sense, than they were before. \n\nAdditionally, she has a hard time processing the idea that I, at some point, loved and cared for them too in the same way as I care for her now. I tend to be a little \"overly-attached\" at times, so I can't really object to this statement. It is not entirely impossible that I care for her the way I do simply because it's in my nature.\n\nHowever, I am positive that I have never been in love with anyone as I have been with my current girlfriend, and wouldn't want it all to end because of this. I have consoled her the best I could, but I'd rather keep it from you redditors. This way, it might be easier to come up with an objective advice.", "summary": "My current girlfriend is envious of my past (sexual) relationships and I wouldn't want it all to end because of this. How can I talk her out of her envy?"}
{"id": "t3_31t9wy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [36 M] texting her [36 F], while she is in a relationship. Boundaries?", "post": "For a couple of years now I've had an acquaintance that I really enjoy talking to and ended up developing a big crush on.\n\nWe met when we were both married, nothing inappropriate went on. Eventually I found out she got separated and we stopped talking. About a year went by and I ended up getting separated from my wife. After I was separated for a bit I contacted her again and after a little back and forth I asked her out. She then informed me that she was seeing someone else (that really hurt).\n\nEven though she is seeing someone, and it really hurt to be rejected, I still enjoy talking to her. Our conversations have been been limited to email and texting for now. Our conversations are light and simple, some joking around.\n\nI know continuing to talk to her is not the smartest decision, since she is involved, and if she doesn't answer I get paranoid she doesn't want to talk to me. Despite this, I would like to keep some time of communication with her. Is this weird? \n\nI know there are no rules for relationship situations, but does anyone have any advise or suggestions?", "summary": "Like talking to women who is seeing someone else, do I continue to talk to her even if I have a crush on her?"}
{"id": "t3_2s2jcs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21/F] with my BF[23/M] - I said something stupid that I cannot take back.", "post": "I said something stupid that I cannot take back, during an argument, and my boyfriend wants to break up. He told me that he feels like he cannot trust me anymore because of what I said. (He thinks I might cheat on him in the future and he doesn't want to have to go through that.)\n\nI don't want the relationship to end like that - I want to work things out. While he was firm on his decision at the beginning, he decided that maybe he could give it a week to think things through, as perhaps he's just too upset now, but no promises. If he thinks we can work it out by the end of the week, he intends to come down to see me. (We live 2 hours away from each other.)\n\nWhat should I do that might help fix things? What's the best way to work things out? He's a very logical person, if that means anything.\n\nNote: I know that it is my fault and that I have issues that I have to deal with in therapy. I take full responsibility for what has happened, so please don't berate me. I just want to know how to fix this relationship in the best way possible.", "summary": "Said something stupid in an argument with my BF. He now thinks that the relationship won't work out. He's giving this a week to mull over it. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_16ngo5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redditors, what do you think I should do about my ex-girlfriend?", "post": "A little background here : My ex broke up with me after cheating on me over a year ago. Five months after the break up, she worked her way back into my life and spent the next year dating other guys who weren't me and treated her like crap. Her mother has recently died and her father was released from jail around the same time of the break up. Her recent behavior has been convincing me that I am better off without her in my life but another part of me wants to keep her around to look out for her. What do you think I should do?", "summary": "Ex-girlfriend is emotionally abusive timebomb and can't decide if better to kick her out of my life or support her and keep her around"}
{"id": "t3_3ab88l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [16F] Mum [45F] just walked in on me in the bath and I think I'm overreacting", "post": "Sorry for formatting - I'm on mobile\n\nStuff like this isn't really an issue normally. My mum came home whilst I was in bath (it's prom tomorrow so I taking longer because I was shaving and whatnot) so she shouted up to me that she needed to use the bathroom and I told her I'd be 10 minutes so that I could finish up. Not 5 minutes again so was shouting up the stairs to me that she needed to go out so she needed to use the bathroom now. I told her that I'd be two minutes more and she could come in (I had to get out with shampoo still in my hair). She opened the door slightly literally 20 seconds later and said \"are you done yet?\" as I was getting out of the bath with a towel around my body. I said (or more like shouted at her) to not open the door at me when I was in the bath. She laughedand said  that it didn't matter because I had a towel on.\n\nI don't feel like that the fucking point though. She didn't know if I had a towel on or not - she may be my mum but I don't feel comfortable being seen naked by her. Who would? I'm really angry about it. I feel like she disrespected me and my privacy by doing this and especially just to laugh it off because it could have left me majorly embarrassed. Like I said, she's never done anything like this before.\n\nReddit, am I overreacting here? I don't know if I can justify being this angry. What should I say about it when she comes home/should I even mention it? If it was me I would have waited until the person inside opened the door for me...", "summary": "my mum walked in on me in the bath (with a towel on) and I don't know if I have the right to be angry or am I overreacting"}
{"id": "t3_11q2vs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "18M currently using 18F and we both know it", "post": "18M here, just started college, have been having a FWB thing with my close friend 18F for about a year now.  We'e known each other for 7.  I treat her less than any other person I talk to, because I know I can.  She loves me profusely and used to get upset at me for treating her so poorly, sleeping with other girls, etc. but now she says she just doesnt care what I do, as long as we remain friends.\n\nI think this is so fucked up.  I actually go out of my way to be an ass to her and she comes back for more, and even brings me cake.  She's insanely sweet and dependent on me.  That's why I think she's better off without me.  I cause her so much emotional pain and we both know it, but she doesn't want to let me go.  She tells me she's miserable without me, but I feel like it's for her own good to break off this friendship.  \n\nShe cares about me an insane amount, I mean she must after all the crap I've put her through.  Anyway why can't I seem to get rid of her.  Not that it's in my particular best interest.  I mean I use her to satisfy my own selfish desires for sex and emotional support, but I provide her with nothing positive. \n\nShe tells me this friendship is something worth fighting for, no matter what I do.  I feel like I just can't win with her.  What do I do?", "summary": "18M is an ass to FWB 18F, yet she will still do anything for our friendship.  I think this is unhealthy, but can't convince her"}
{"id": "t3_4o46gx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (20M) hypocrisy over a girl I've been casually sleeping with is eating me up inside", "post": "Two months ago I met a European girl in a club. We slept together that night, and since then we've been in touch fairly often, and even done things like going to the beach together and a football match (she's a fan, don't worry I didn't drag her there). However we always made it clear that this is not some sort of relationship. She recently got out of an abusive one with a man she was going to marry and I know she needs some time to be free; I'll be leaving here back to Britain in a month or so too so I can't really date anyone per se...\n\nHowever every time I see her post a photo with another guy on Instagram, it eats me up inside. It makes me feel horrible. This is despite the fact that since I last saw her two weeks ago, I've had sex with someone else I'm planning to meet up with.\n\nAt this point I would like to appreciate that it is me at fault here, but how can I overcome this?", "summary": "Despite sleeping around myself, I can't stomach my casual partner doing the same. How do I get over (what is clearly *my* problem"}
{"id": "t3_2quw46", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Moving to CO, need help deciding on a breed", "post": "I am moving out to Colorado from Virginia in May and I intend on getting a dog, my first dog. I don't know much about dogs and will do a lot of research into training and the personalities of each specific breed but I'm looking for ideas for which breed to get. \n\nA little about me: I'm a 27 year old male moving in (to hopefully a single family home, but maybe an apartment) with 2 other guys in their mid-twenties. I will be living in the Denver area of Colorado with frequent weekend hiking trips in the mountains that I would want my dog to take part in. I also like to go running so that would be awesome to have a dog that could join me in that too. \n\nI would prefer a short haired breed. Also, I would prefer a dog around 40-60 lbs, not too big, but certainly not too small. I looked into Siberian Husky and Shiba Inu, but they both seem like pretty stubborn breeds that are hard to train and the massive shedding is not desirable, although not a deal breaker. Just started looking into breeds today but I thought the Australian Cattle Dog looked like a good breed for me. Thoughts? Any help would be greatly appreciated!!", "summary": "I'm moving to Colorado in May and need help deciding on a breed for the active young guy that has never owned a dog before."}
{"id": "t3_ks8cm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Men of Reddit:  At what age did your parents allow you to decide how you wanted your hair?", "post": "Background info:\nI have a stepson who will be 10 in a few days.  He wants to grow his hair out.  His dad & I have no problem with that, and whenever needed, we trim it around his ears a bit.  My stepson's mother, on the other hand, thinks he looks \"stupid\" (and has used this word at him).  In April or May, she got her boyfriend to shave his head against his will.  At school the next day, kids made fun of him.  My BF shaved his head that night so as not to make his son feel so bad about himself.  My BF got a call from his ex's BF last night (she was apparently CRYING because her son was refusing to allow them to shave his head) saying that their son was being difficult and wouldn't let them shave his head.  After a VERY long and frustrating conversation, it was decided that they would attempt to trim it.  He's ten years old, he should be allowed to choose how he wants to have his hair.  I feel terrible for him.", "summary": "10 year old isn't allowed to choose his own hairstyle because his mother is a cunt.  BF & I don't care how he has his hair."}
{"id": "t3_20mx27", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/m] Should I tell my girlfriend (20/f) that I slept with her promiscuous friend right before we started going out?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been going out nine months and she's not the type to sleep around and she's slightly critical of other promiscuous people (especially those with a track record of going in bare and being reckless). Anyway, she has a friend she's not particularly close to and she made a comment that she would never consider dating anyone that has been with this friend of hers since those men are only there for the pussy, they use her friend, and any man who is dumb enough to fuck her without protection has no standards or any regard for his personal health.\n\nWell, I kind of fucked the friend. Three days before I asked my girlfriend out. She doesn't know. At all. She thinks I hadn't fucked anyone since the relationship I had before her because that's what I told her.\n\nI'd keep her in ignorance because if I could do it again I wouldn't have fucked the friend but we were both drunk and she was down to fuck and I wanted some pussy. Now, my issue is that their friendship is on the rocks and I feel that if shit hits the fan her friend will tell her we fucked and I'll be caught in a lie.\n\nI do know that she wouldn't be dating me if she knew I fucked her friend and she's the world to me. She's foreign and not as liberal with random fucking between strangers (which I'm not opposed to at all but she doesn't know that). I do admit that I find that quality in her super admirable but, again, I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place.\n\nDoes she hear it from me or do I risk her potentially finding out from either her friend or another third party?", "summary": "Fucked my girlfriend's friend and my girlfriend doesn't know. Wouldn't be dating me if she knew. Do I tell her?"}
{"id": "t3_13ubgi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I recently moved cross-country with my job and I hate it! Help!", "post": "Hello everyone ... let me give you a little background. About 2 months ago, my company moved my department, including my job, from New York to California. I reluctantly went with my job because I am young and felt that it would be good for my career. I don't know a single person here -- no family, friends, etc. -- and my job situation has gotten progressively more difficult every day. I really hate where I am living, and my job has gotten me so stressed out and depressed that I need to start taking anti-depressants again. I've even been having major panic attacks. The company was very shifty and unsupportive in the move, but has me locked into 2 years or else I have to pay back the moving expenses. I really wish I could transfer back home or quit, but I can't. What do I do?", "summary": "I hate my job and want to quit, moved 2500 miles from home for it, know no one here, but I'm locked into 2 years. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2qxzq5", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not doing well on the AMC 8", "post": "Happy New Years Eve, everyone! I hope your's is more enjoyable than mine. MAA is slowly posting the high scorers(with the scores) for the AMC 8 on their website. They seem to post school by school. My mother got extremely angry when she saw that they posted a score from someone in my, but didn't post my score. (The highest score you can get is a 25, they were posting any score that 19 or above) She has been screaming at me for the last hour about the whole deal. As a middle schooler taking Precalc, my mother and I were expecting me to score 23 or higher. However, according to the website, I am not a high scorer. This will not daunt me, I will do try to get a great score for the AMC 10. This post was relieve some stress. Thank you for reading.", "summary": "Middler schooler tacking precalc screws up on the AMC 8. Mother screams, middle schooler now determined to do fantastic on the AMC 10."}
{"id": "t3_ap9pk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I am in desperate need of your help.", "post": "Alright, I will try to keep this short while still giving you guys the full scope of my problem. I am a 19 year old male who is healthy in almost every way possible. I am not overweight, I take care of my body and I interact socially with a large group of friends on a regular basis. My problem is that I have been suffering from depression since the begining of highschool (freshman in college now). I realize that many people suffer from depression, and it can be overcome, but depression is not the reason I am here today. Reddit, although it pains me to admit it, I have completely lost any semblance of a sex drive I once had. It has nothing to do with lack of being able to get girls in bed, I am fairly attractive (or so i've been told) and pretty confident and charismatic as well. The problem is that when I get girls in bed, I am unable to function sexually (I can't get hard). \n\nNow initially I blamed this on the anti-depressants, was talking prozac at the time which is an SSRI, but I switched to a non-ssri called bupropinol of which I take 450 mg daily. Reddit, the problem is nothing has changed. I was drinking with a gorgeous girl the other night, and when we got down to it I was unable to function. I ended up just going down on her and we both had a good time, but it was embarassing for me not to be able to do what we both wanted to do. \n\nI am set to see this girl again (later today, possibly tomorrow if I push it back) so any advice you can give would be greatly appriciated. This is not an isolated incident either, this has happened to me a total of 3 times so far. Initially it was just anxiety, but now I dont know what to think. I literally have no motivation to go after girls anymore because I feel like I wont be able to function when I need to. Please help me reddit, you're the only people I feel I can trust to give me an honest opinion with legitimate answers.", "summary": "cant get hard when in bed with girls, healthy life from an outside perspective, emotional wreck inside. pls suggest potential solutions or just give advice or even opinions."}
{"id": "t3_166c45", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Boyfriend (M23) and I (F23) broke up today.We are meeting this weekend for one last talk to \"clear the air\". Should I tell him I cheated on him, or let the relationship go in peace?", "post": "If you are going to tell me what a horrible person I am don't because I already know.\nLength of Relationship-- 5.5+ years\n\nAnyways...I have been in a relationship with my now ex-boyfriend my entire time in college. I have graduated and am currently employed. We broke up today (he broke up with me but I felt the same way). We have had a very toxic relationship for a while. We both have had emotional abuse from both ends. We should have ended it a while ago.\n\nHe wants to get together this weekend and have one last talk. Over the summer we were apart and we didn't speak for weeks. I was in a very bad place in my life and I hung out with an old ex. We didn't have sex but we did make out and things got a bit touchy-feely.\n\nMy question is..Do I tell him this weekend when we get together for one last talk? He is planning on admitting me a few things to me, ( I don't think it is cheating) in order to clear the air. Or do I let things be and not burden him with this?", "summary": "Boyfriend and I broke up today. He wants to get together for one last \"clear the air\" talk. Should I tell him I cheated on him or should I let things go and move on?"}
{"id": "t3_1kcsvw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[F/21]Cheated on [M/22] and just found out, what do I do.", "post": "I had been with my very recently ex boyfriend for 6 years, we dated throughout high school and college and are now entering our senior year of college. Last semester I studied abroad and despite things being very rocky with my boyfriend I was adamant that I didn't want to cheat. I had many opportunities to and many temptations and felt bad I even wanted to but was happy I didn't. After coming home from abroad we broke up for nonrelated reasons. It was my decision to break up and I did so because there were problems in our relationship I couldn't look past when there was suddenly so much pressure on us to get engaged after such a long time together or at the very least make permanent plans together. I knew we needed to grow up if we ever wanted a chance together in the future, and even though I don't want to be together right now I know it is something I always want available for me in the future because he still is someone who is very important to me.\n\nI just yesterday found out that I had too much to drink and kissed another guy. I don't remember anything. I feel awful. I don't know if I should tell my ex because we were together when it happened or if it would be better to keep it to myself. We are trying very hard to be friends and have an amicable break up. I'm worried if I tell him it won't help anything however I feel as if telling the truth is the right thing to do. I don't care what I have to do, I just want to do what is best for him.", "summary": "BF of 6 years, went abroad and cheated while blacked out, came home and broke up, just found out about cheating. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4x9axl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (31m) roommate's (31m) guest never leaves my apartment. Going on 2 weeks now and I'm annoyed", "post": "Hey everyone. My roommate and I are coming to the end of 2 years of living together. Long story short, I will not continue to live with him beyond 2 years.\n\nWe used to work together and I thought he had his act together. Little did I know it was all a front. He hardly leaves the apartment besides to go to work, never buys household goods, barely cleans up after himself, and definitely doesn't do his fair share of things around the apt.\n\nHe's generally a nice guy but he's completely oblivious and can be really inconsiderate. For example we used to smoke (weed) together from time to time. I am for the most part cool with it. Then it started turning into 12 hour smoke sessions where he would sit in his room all day smoking. I eventually asked him to stop smoking inside, but slowly he started to again. Finally one night, I had had enough and I called him out and he's taken to smoking outside.\n\nSo here's what happened. At the beginning of the month he told me a friend of his needed a place to stay for a few days. I obliged under the agreement that she wouldn't be in the apt all day (I'm working from home and interviewing, speaking on the phone with privileged information, financials, etc.)\n\nHere we are almost two weeks later. She's been here almost every day. The one day she wasn't here, he had his FWB staying the night.\n\nI'm incredibly annoyed at this point. I texted him yesterday (as I knew I wouldn't be home when he was.) Yet he never replied. I texted him again this AM and still crickets.\n\nMy friends say I'm more upset than I should be, but I think my anger is justified. It makes more work for me (constantly emptying the dishwasher, trash I only take out, lack of any kind of alone time in MY own apartment.) I'm not sure what to do at this point. I know I have to confront him but I feel like such a nag with these situations he puts me in. Any type of advice for confronting this would be really appreciated.", "summary": "Roommates houseguest has overstayed her welcome. Tried to ask roommate how much longer she'd be staying and he's avoiding answering me. Need advice with how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_137wcp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I've been told that it looks terrible if you quit a job within 2 years. Reddit, when is it okay to quit your job?", "post": "I've been a Marketing Assistant at my company for 5 months now. This is my first job out of school and I couldn't be more miserable. I'm overworked and underpaid and I'm always taking the blame even when I'm not involved. I do not have a good work/life balance anymore. I am looked down upon when I do not continue work at home unpaid while others do nothing. Speaking of, I've taken on key functions of other employees jobs which I am not qualified for but my supervisor doesn't care. I cannot complete these tasks because I do not understand what I'm doing. I want to leave but I don't want potential employers to frown upon the \"5 months\". I can stay a little longer but I can't handle much more. When would it be acceptable to quit and not have potential employers look down upon my experience?", "summary": "I'm extremely uncomfortable at my first job out of college and I want to quit but I've only been there for 5 months. How long should I stay there so I still look like a good, reliable candidate in the future?"}
{"id": "t3_1cg7mv", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Advice please: My two adopted kittens now fight", "post": "Background: We adopted two 8 month old kittens about a month ago from a shelter.  The shelter staff said that as brother and sister they had to be adopted out together, and that fighting shouldn't be a problem.  They are also currently entirely indoor, but in a couple of weeks when the weather improves in UK there going to be able to go outside in the day time.\n\nProblem: They have always done some rough housing, but in the last week this has got much worse.  The two of them seem to constantly been pouncing and fighting each other now, and its gone from playing to hissing and yowling.\n\nIts particularly infuriating because it tends to start at about midnight and keep going till at least 3am disturbing everyones sleep.\n\nI know play fighting is common, and cats need to establish dominance when they first come into a new area but this is getting to be a bit of a problem, and i'm worried the smaller one will get hurt.\n\nAny ideas on how to stop this? is there something I can be doing to help them get along again or at least stop this fighting?", "summary": "Two sibling cats adopted together gone from grooming each other to attempting to maul each other.  Would like that to stop please."}
{"id": "t3_rlguq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Making it 'official'--important or not?", "post": "We're both in our mid-twenties.\n\nI've been seeing her for about 2 months. In the past month, we've spent almost every day together and have been on plenty of dates. We sleep together almost every night and have had sex about a dozen times. We're affectionate, communicative and generally very happy with one another. Essentially, we're in a relationship, but we haven't made it official, or exclusive.\n\nShe got out of a serious relationship about 2 months before meeting me, and she was the one who was broken up with. She has said that she's wary of getting into another serious relationship, as she has been in one kind or another since her teenage years, with little gap between. She seems anxious about us becoming serious so fast, but we seem to be so good together that we've been able to get to this point despite her reservations.\n\n**If I'm fairly certain that she's committed to being romantically involved with only me, should I even make the move to talk with her about making it 'official'?** I don't really care about titles or labels, etc. but I'm afraid of scaring her off by talking to her about it. That said, I want some sense of security. \n\nShould I instead just man up and let it play out on its own (i.e. enjoy the relationship for what it is and wait for a natural progression), or is asking her to make it official a natural move in and of itself?\n\nLastly, what signs from her should I look for that she wants to make it official? She's already said things like \"I love sleeping with you; I love holding and being held by you; You're amazing; We're virtually in a relationship (but not quite); I really really like you\" etc. but she has also said things like \"This is moving kind of fast; You're going to get bored of me; We see each other so much\"", "summary": "Two months in, I really like this girl. Girl seems wary of commitment but really likes me. We're practically in a relationship but without the label. Bring up 'official' talk, or is it detrimental?"}
{"id": "t3_xln97", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "16 year old friend of my brother takes massive dump, uses our vacuum to suck up the shitty water. Mom doesn't want to call him out to protect my brother. What can I do?", "post": "I live away from home. My mom  calls me tonight and tells me this story:\n\nSo he came over for a sleep over. Took a massive dump in the bathroom, saw the water wasn't going down and instead of using the plunger, went back to sleep. Next day he and my mom tried to plunge the sucker but it would not budge. She had to leave to go to the gym and in the meantime he used our central vacuum (not a cheap toy) to suck up the shitty water before it overflowed.\n\nFilled a fair amount of the tank, which is in the garage. Didn't tell a soul. 3 weeks of crazy heat wave weather later, mom goes into the garage and smells death. She thinks \"Hey, I also havent emptied this tank in months, I should check it\". This woman, with a terrible spine, proceeds to lift what she thought was a light tank, and is stuck with 40lbs of liquid. The smell hits her. She somehow manages to unhook it and spends 2 hrs cleaning the fucker. Thank goodness she works in the healthcare industry and knows how to deal with this hazard.\n\nI asked her if she's going to call the kid's parents or talk to the kid. She doesn't want my brother to be mocked as a taddler (highschool is plai ol' retarded and he is relatively popular) so she simply is banning the kid from the house.\n\nI can't just sit here and let this happen without any responsibility on the kid! My dad is gone for a year long tour in Africa so it's not like he can step in and scare the kid straight.\n\nReddit, ideas?", "summary": "kid clogs toilet, uses vacuum to suck the shitty water, mom cleans the tank 3 weeks later, won't call the kid's parents."}
{"id": "t3_3gw8wl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [21 M] shared some of his drink with me [22 F] It feels kind of intimate, but I'm not sure if I'm looking too deeply into it.", "post": "I am engaged, and my friend is married. He is actually more of my fiance's friend than he is mine. He has known my fiance for about 6 months now, and me for a shorter amount of time. He, my fiance and I have spent probably a total of 7 whole days together, and only about 2 with his wife involved.\n\nLast night, he spent the night at me and my fiance's place. My fiance was on the computer, and my friend and I were sitting watching TV. He held up an unopened fruit juice and asked me if I had ever had it before. I said no. He said he thought it was pretty good, then mentioned it's one of the few ways he can get his wife to drink anything that's not soda. \n\nHe asked me if I wanted some. I was genuinely curious and didn't want to say no, so I accepted. I opened it and took a drink. I told him I thought it was good, and gave it back. He drank.\n\nI have never shared a drink with someone who was not my family or SO, so this whole thing seems intimate to me. Is it a big deal or no?", "summary": "Married friend asked me if I wanted some of his drink. He drank after me. Is it an intimate thing, or is it normal around friends, even relatively new ones?"}
{"id": "t3_3ci8wc", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "At what point should you help family with debt?", "post": "Recently, my mother asked for a loan from me and my sibling to get her and my father out of debt, but I'm not entirely sure if we should or not? It's somewhat substantial (around 30k, so 15k from my sibling and me), and while we can afford to do so I'm not sure it's something that we should absolutely do. My mother offered to write up a contract to pay us back over the span of three years; she even suggested a decent annual interest rate of 5 percent. \n\nMy hesitation lies primarily with her spending habits. While I'm fairly confident in her promise to pay back the loan in full, I feel that she is only asking this because she recently discovered our financial situation and realized that we can afford to essentially bail her out. While her spending habits are not too crazy, she often splurges on trips and eats out a fair amount and will often buy things she doesn't need. Currently, my parents are saving up for a fancy motorcycle, although my mother has assured me that they are not planning on buying it anytime soon. I'm worried that she will use our money to pay off her debts without adopting more frugal habits as a result (and perhaps even splurging on the motorcycle).\n\nI'm mostly feeling obligated because my parents paid for both of our college tuitions (at great financial stress), but I also feel like if she adopted a decent financial plan they could pay off their debts on their own.", "summary": "Mother wants to use my sibling's and my financial resources to pay off her debt (with interest) in lieu of the current high interest rates offered by credit card companies. When is this something you should consider doing?"}
{"id": "t3_4i3iq4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24F] SIL [29F] wants nothing to do with me. How do I mend our relationship before our entire family falls apart?", "post": "So I work at a family business that is very quickly growing into a large business. I have been working there for 3 years with my husband [32M], both his parents and his sister.\n\nBasically his sister thinks I have been going behind her back attempting to sabotage her part of the business, and I honestly am blown away that she thinks that. While she was pregnant and on leave I helped build her brand into something that could really take off and she really did not do anything with it once I passed it back to her.\n\nAfter a big dramatic event at work, she did not talk to me and my husband for an entire month.\n\nI finally confronted her about it today and told her I was sorry that it seemed like we were going behind her back, but that was never any of our intention and we didn't mean to hurt her if we had done so and I would like to mend our relationship and sister-in-laws.\n\nShe came back and said that I was young and immature and don't think about other people. I apparently am incredibly inconsiderate and am too ambitious. She also says I never should have had anything to do with her part of the business/brand and that it was my fault that it is the way it is. She says she doesn't want anything to do with us right now and we took too long to apologize to her and her ship has sailed.\n\nI am afraid I am breaking up my husbands family. His parents have only given us bad advice from the start and its really what has gotten us to this breaking point. They kept telling us to move forward with working on her stuff, then when we said we didn't have the bandwidth anymore to the CEO and her boss, thats when she stopped talking to us.\n\nCommunication with her has been out the door since she got pregnant with her first kid. I will admit that my communication should have been better, but she did not make any effort herself.\n\nSo now this whole family fight is my fault and I am the one who just married in and I feel like I am breaking the family apart. How do I fix everything?", "summary": "SIL thinks I went behind her back at work and now doesn't want to have anything to do with my husband and I."}
{"id": "t3_2t8i7r", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I need some advice on improving my living situation and my life in general. (X-Post from /r/personalfinance)", "post": "I graduated from highschool in 2012. I am now 20 years old (21 in June). So about 3 years ago my mom finally won custody over my sister and me after about 10 years of custody battles. The only problem is that all the years before took such a financial toll on my mom. So the past years she's basically been struggling to even be there for us at all. About 2 years ago she lost the apartment that we were living in. I had to live with my bestfriend for the last months of Highschool. My mom and sister stayed with one of her friends from the area. After Highschool we all moved in with my mom's parents. It's a mess really. I don't like going into detail on the living situation, but let's just say its very messy. I really don't like living like this although I have for the past couple of years.\n\nI have a pretty nice job at a high end computer retailer and I'm looking to continue education for a better career. The only problem is I really don't have the drive to do anything significant at the moment. What I would like to do is get my own apartment (Don't care about the size) and start again on my own. I feel like I've been dragged into a pit with the rest of my family that I cannot get out of. I just need some advice on how I can move forward. It probably doesn't help that I haven't been getting along with my mom lately. \n\nIn recent months she has denied my access to use the car (Which I ONLY use for work) and I had to improvise on ways to get to work everyday. It seems to have come to that again and I don't know if I'll be able to keep my job if I can't get there. The next best way would be by train which is a 3 hour ride so I have to get up 5 hours before my shift (Which is REALLY bad if my shift starts at 7am). Even worse the trains dont run at all the hours that I work and I just dont make enough for so many train rides.", "summary": "I have a terrible living situation at the moment. My current goals are simple: Get my own place to stay and a way to get back and forth to work. That's all I want right now."}
{"id": "t3_1gwm03", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I don't think I actually like my girlfriend. Am I right to break up with her?", "post": "I know the title sounds stupid.\n\nI am 35, my girlfriend is 37.\n\nI've been with my girlfriend for 7 years. She is super smart, kind, funny, loyal, and has made me a better person. I do love her.\n\nBut for a few years she wasn't very nice to me (she's now a recovering alcoholic) and in general I would describe her as fairly rude and nagging and in general wound up too tight. To top it off she had very low self esteem and a huge ego. \n\nShe has family members who are the same. It would be fair to describe them as \"difficult\".\n\nI have my own issues of course, and I am sure some of her behavior is a result of my behavior, but in general it's just her personality and overall she just isn't very nice to be around sometimes.\n\nFor example, I have a very stressful job (senior manager in a messed up company). She has an easy job (part-time English teacher). I will come home and tell her about my day. She immediately starts telling me what to do (in an aggressive tone) and gets a bit annoyed if I don't take her advice or I disagree. Every time I tell her about my day I start regretting telling her, even though her advice is often very good. She's just so aggressive with her opinions.\n\nSo this has been dragging on for years and I have been patient with her and she has tried to change (she really has) but I think at this stage it has just killed our relationship. I love her but I don't think I like her. She's rude, domineering, aggressive, irritable, moody. \n\nI should also mention my dislike of her has now entered the bedroom and I don't want to have sex with her, or children.\n\nSo I broke up with her yesterday but I don't know if I am making a big mistake. She is trying. Maybe I need to be more supportive. Maybe it's my fault... I am confused.\n\nThis has been an issue for a few years.\n\nAny advice for me?!\n\nThanks", "summary": "my girlfriend has been a bit of a pain in the ass for so long I don't think I even like her as a person anymore"}
{"id": "t3_s5gz6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, have you ever ate something so good that you will never eat again? (Story inside)", "post": "So I wanted to sweeten up my bosses this morning by showing up early and with a box of doughnuts. Went to the local bakery and asked for an assorted dozen. Well either the baker knew what I was in for or it was just fate. Packed in that floppy white box was a blueberry muffin doughnut with a hint of glaze on top. After realizing that showing up early and getting no thanks for the doughnuts I said screw it I'm going to get one. I chose that blueberry muffin doughnut. I split it in half and took a bite..........I felt like I have never been awake in my entire life until just then.  This was almost 16 hours ago and I can't stop thinking about that doughnut. So much that I don't want to eat it again at the chance it might not be as good as the first time around.", "summary": "Ate a blueberry muffin doughnut and it was so good that I never want to eat it again at the chance of ruining that moment I had"}
{"id": "t3_262ihq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26 M] girlfriend [25 F] of 2 years hates my relationship with a friend", "post": "So I have been dating my girlfriend for about 2 years now.  Seems to be going good most of the time but we have one main issue that keeps coming up.  She hates one of my friends who is a girl.  This girl has been my friend for 6-7 years all through college and the years after.  Me and this friend have never had sex or kissed or dated or anything, it has always been strictly friendship.  After a while my girlfriend told me she is uncomfortable with my and her close friendship and thinks that I am closer to my friend than her.  So I pretty much stop hanging out with this friend and only talk very occasionally.  However it is difficult since this friend is part of my circle of friends and is a good friend of my roommates and also a roommate of one of my very good friends.\n\nTo me this is an issue with her trusting me.  I have never cheated, nor came close to cheating on her with anyone.  I am a trustworthy person, I dont go out late partying or anything like that anymore.  And I know sometimes her ex's text her and she gives them quick blow-off replies and such but I never worry about it because I trust her.  I also don't like the idea of being told whom I can and cant be friends with if the relationship with this person is only based in friendship.\n\nAm I in the wrong here? Is this something I need to respect and just end a friendship even though I completely disagree? Is she in the wrong?", "summary": "Girlfriend doesnt like female friend.  Friendship is not sexual or flirty.  Girlfriend still complains.  Barely friends, still complains"}
{"id": "t3_14ojfn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What have you done to improve your life this year?", "post": "A year ago I pledged to try my best to become a better person and imprvoce my life: I've lost 40 pounds, stopped bitting my nails, saved money to go to any concert I wanted including a cruise, and starting dating an amazing girl.\n\nThis year I will be attempting to improve my speaking skills by learning new words, reading more books, and being less vulgar. I want to save money to pay off my loans. **AND THE HARDEST OF ALL**, I will be quitting reddit. Starting (ending?) with this post. I will not visit the site again as soon as I hit the submit button. \n\nI think reddit is an amazing source for information and one of my absolutely favorite places; However, I do not yet posses the personal restraint to stop it from inhibiting my productivity. I wish you all the best of luck in improving your lives and look forwarding to reading your responses (if any at all) in a year.", "summary": "I did things. I liked what I did. I'm trying harder to do more things. I don't want it to end."}
{"id": "t3_1i3r8i", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Do they ever come back from the 'grass is greener on the other side' phase? Is it worth it to try or move on?", "post": "I (f/18) was dumped via text by him (m/18) after a 2.5 year relationship because he was not done 'partying' and felt as if we had growing up to do. Commonly these are signs of the 'grass is greener on the other side' syndrome. We just recently graduated and plan to attend college this fall (him at a university, me at a small community college about 30 minutes away.) The relationship was honestly very smooth, we were in love, had many plans and aspirations together and our families adored one another. He showed no signs of disinterest until about a week ago, he started partying more, hanging out with more friends that he normally wouldn't.\n \n\nNow, I had no problem with this, I never asked to join in on his fun time with friends, always offered to be a safe drive home and only asked for simple information in return, when he couldn't produce that information that is when it upset me. He started being shady, putting friends/getting drunk before me especially at times I really needed him and finally ended it 3 days ago. All these newly developed characteristics are highly unlike him, if he comes back and gets his priorities in check what shall I do? This pattern could stop and then continue in college, yet I know school is a number one priority for him.\n \n\nI understand when he said we needed to grow. We've been together most of our high school years. But I also know that was just a diversion from the whole \"I want to go out and party\" and there is nothing better than growing WITH someone and if two people can do that it is truly amazing. Does anyone have experience with a relationship like this? What was it like to move on/do they ever come back and realize how dumb they were being?", "summary": "Boyfriend dumps me out of the blue because he wants to continue partying when I never hindered him from doing so. If he tries to come back, what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1bi2p2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18F] am confused/between current [18M] boyfriend and [18M] ex", "post": "My boyfriend of over two and a half years and I broke up right before summer (before going to college for me, before his sophomore college year).  He had been acting different upon returning from school, we grew a bit distant; told him I was unsure, he broke up with me the next day. Almost got back together twice over the summer, he initiated it and ended it both times. I (stupidly) had rebound of my high school best friend over summer, ex-boyfriend thinks he was reason why we broke up and despises me for it.  I leave for school on bad terms with both, ex-boyfriend blocks my number, refuses to talk to me, etc.\n\nFast forward September college freshman, meet and begin dating new guy I meet at school. Fall in love with him and we are together currently, doing well and are both happy.  The ex-boyfriend contacts me approximately two weeks prior, I tell the current boyfriend of our  interaction.  I end up writing pages and pages to ex-boyfriend, and think maybe he has feelings? He wants to stop talking; I get upset; he tells me he still loves me and wants to be together and is sorry for everything.\n\nI feel bad for even considering the possibility of being with my ex-boyfriend again.  My current relationship has its ups and its downs, but is still beautiful and wonderful.  I am going home for work purposes in two weeks, as is the ex-boyfriend, and we are meeting and talking. Is it possible to love two people at once? Am I holding onto residual feelings? I feel bad for my current boyfriend and my ex and cannot distinguish my feelings for which one to be with.  It is unfair to both and I don't want to feel guilty and bad again but I also don't want to make the wrong choice.  I did not consider my feelings for my ex before he told me he still loved me, and I do not want to be emotionally cheating, although I realize that seems as if it is happening. What to do?", "summary": "Ex boyfriend of 2.5 year relationship contacts me during happy 6 month+ current relationship and old feelings seem to be surfacing HELP?!"}
{"id": "t3_164kpu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What are some fun adult tech/hardware projects.", "post": "I was always a huge fan of things like k'nex and fischertechnik as a kid, and loved my \"300-in-1 Electronic Project Lab\" even though I didn't understand any of it (could still follow the directions to do the projects though and had a lot of fun).\n\nI'm looking for something along those lines but a little more advanced. Are there any fun kits out there for adults to build that still give that sought after sense of satisfaction when you finish it?\n\nI've peeked at things like the raspberry pi or the arduino. But I'm not really the most imaginative type and prefer to work through a predefined project than just fiddle around with no real goal. And the variations of arduino boards was a little overwhelming, would never be able to decide on a whim. I have a BS in Comp. Sci. and programming is my full time job, just hoping to get a little experience hardware side in a fun way.\n\nI tried to find a more focused subreddit to ask this in but wasn't able to uncover anything, so feel free to just yell at me to go to some other sub, still appreciated.\n\nMany thanks!", "summary": "Looking for fun kits to build as an adult. Be it a complete box with everything. Or a specific arduino board and a link to your favorite project."}
{"id": "t3_3fq0qw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [20 M] meeting my girlfriend's [19 F] parents, and I have no idea what to expect.", "post": "A couple months ago, I matched with a girl on Tinder, right before I went on a two week vacation. We've talked everyday, and eventually decided to meet up. When I came back, we've been hanging out every weekend, usually on short hiking trips. This past weekend I finally had the courage to ask her out, to which she said yes. Unfortunately, she mentioned that her father isn't too pleased that we're together fairly early on.\n\nI decided the best thing to do would be to meet with her parents, but I am now very nervous about making a good first impression. I have already decided on bringing a gift for the house and some nice flowers for her mom, but have no clue what to do / what to expect next.", "summary": "First time meeting girlfriend's parents, pretty nervous and her father feels it's too early to be dating. No idea what to expect."}
{"id": "t3_2kylqn", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Because of a misdemeanor charge over two years ago, I am having trouble finding a job.", "post": "Almost two years ago, my (now ex) girlfriend got caught stealing a box of condoms. I was not stealing, but I was with her when she did. I did not stop her, but I also was not aware that she was stealing. She got caught, and I went to jail with her. I lawyered up, but the lawyer said that it would be best if I plead guilty, as to avoid a costly trial with Wal-Mart that would likely result in a conviction, even if I wasn't actually guilty. I was told that Wal-Mart goes all-out on their lawyers, and that they would hire a lawyer even if the ends didn't justify the means, so that they could prove a point.\n\nThe judge was nice and didn't sentence a fine or jail time to me, but he did for my girlfriend. I did plead guilty, and that is still on my record.\n\nTwo years later, and I am still having trouble finding employers that will hire me. Lots of my friends have said that it would be better to just lie on an application and that many employers don't check criminal history.\n\nI currently have a job, but as the company will likely go under in the next three years, I am looking for a new career.\n\nIs it best to lie on an application? On all of the ones I have filled out, I have not lied. It seems underhanded, even if I did not commit the crime. What would you guys do?", "summary": "Pleaded guilty to stealing, but didn't actually steal. No jail time, no fine (aside from court costs) no community service. Trouble finding a job."}
{"id": "t3_14vacj", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Dad emails me (28F) and demands I change my name. What to do?", "post": "Little background. Im a 28 Asian(vietnamese) female. Born and raised in California. First generation. Only child. My name has always been \"asian,\" never really had a legal american name. Regardless, around the age of 8, due to my name ending in Dai (Pronounded Die), people started calling me Lady or Lady Dai. So for 20 years, my given name correlated with my birth name.\n\nSo today I get an email from my dad. He wants to change my birth name to an even harder to pronounce vietnamese name \" Thien Kim T. Nguyen\" Personally I cant even pronounce the first word.  Ive stated \" if Im going to change my name to anything, Its going to be Lady or something AMERICAN.\" due to the fact, I work in a business industry, an even more complexed asian name, will not fit, or make introductions to others any easier. \n\nThe problem is my dad is your typical \" Im right you are wrong\". His reason for changing my name is to change my fate. To make my life better, change the course I am on. I don't agree with this logic, and as he is the most superstitious,  demanding asian father, I dont know what to do.\n\nI know I can simply say no. And not go through with the paperwork, but my dad is vengeful. He will make sure my life is a living hell, cutting me off, disowning me. etc. etc. Its all been done before. \n\nIs there a way I can approach him, to get him to understand? Im hoping someone has some insight on dealing with asian parents. As I was more influenced by the American Culture, its hard for myself to speak in a way that could be understood and respected.", "summary": "Asian father wants me to change my name to something even more \"asian\" for superstitious reasons. How to approach him?"}
{"id": "t3_32n4o7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF [19 F] of 8 months is uncomfortable with me[20 M] living with a female friend of several years during the summer. Is it as big a deal as she says it is?", "post": "So I've been dating this girl for 8 months, and we've been best friends for just under two years. I absolutely love her and our relationship is great. \n\nSo I have an internship this summer in a very expensive city, and a female friend of several years, also 20 is working right next to me. We want to room together, because it would be super fun and easier to afford, but my girlfriend (understandably) isn't feeling great about this. \n\nDepending on the place, we might be sharing one room with 2 beds.\n\nWhat should I do about this? I don't want to make her worry or anything over the summer, and I feel like if I push super hard for it it would make it even weirder.", "summary": "My girlfriend doesn't want me rooming with another girl this summer; I don't think it's that big of a deal."}
{"id": "t3_329m5n", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[17/f] A close friend of mine (17/f) recently confessed to me. She wants to see a movie with me; is this a date? What do I do?", "post": "A few months ago, a female friend of mine who I've known since elementary school confessed she had romantic feelings towards me. \n\nI don't really reciprocate those feelings, I think, but I don't particularly care if she has a crush on me or not. I don't feel uncomfortable. I just don't want to hurt her feelings or damage our friendship, you know?\n\nAfter confessing, she said she'd try and forget about it. I don't want to act any differently around her or change our friendship just because she likes me, but she has behaved kinda flirtatiously since that time. Now, a few hours ago, she asked me if I wanted to  \"go on a movie date in town\". \n\nNormally, I would suggest someone else come along, but this is a movie that everyone else in our friend group saw for its midnight premiere. I agreed to meet her but... I don't want this to be a date. I just want to hang out with a friend. I don't want to avoid spending time with her for \"what if\" situations.\n\nSince nothing has been explicitly said, I don't wanna come flat out \"I only like you as a friend\" unprovoked. It seems presumptuous to do so.", "summary": "Girl who likes me wants to hang out. How can I make sure this is a friend thing, not a date thing?"}
{"id": "t3_28272u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31 M] with my fiancee [31 F] of 1.5 years, dealing with alcohol and quasi-infidelity", "post": "Rant follows:\n\nSo my fiancee and I have been in an amazing, intense relationship. We both like to drink and have a good time. That was one of the first things we noticed about each other - in past relationships we both felt like we had to try to act mature and stop partying, but together we just had so much fun hanging out together and going out with each others' friends, etc. \n\nBut this past week she was at a work conference and her company threw a big party the last night. There was an open bar, and she had been working really hard so I guess she just got really drunk and was kind of a mess. She was talking shit about her old boss (who works at her company but is in another department now) to anyone who would listen. Then she started dancing with random guys. She didn't even remember until one of her friends called the next day to make sure she was ok and didn't do anything stupid. She said she didn't kiss anyone or do anything other than dance, but that she was dancing \"scandalously,\" at least for a work setting. Obviously, I was very hurt, but what hurt the most was when she saw I was upset she said \"I shouldn't have told you.\" \n\nThat's when I really got upset and went to go lie down. We talked a bunch and she says she's always had self-destructive tendencies (which we've discussed before) but that she thought that was all behind her because it hadn't happened while we've been together and she said I'm the best thing that's ever happened to her, etc.\n\nShe now wants to see a therapist and stop drinking, at least for a bit and then decide whether to cut back or stop altogether. I guess I don't really have a question, I just wanted to rant a bit. But advice is welcome and I'll try to answer any questions people have. Thanks for listening.", "summary": "Fiancee got drunk, destroyed her reputation at work and danced inappropriately with random guys; is seeking treatment for alcohol dependency."}
{"id": "t3_1cckpk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend (M/33) of seven months asked me how many guys I've (F/34) slept with. Do I have to answer this?", "post": "My boyfriend asked me today how many guys I've slept with in the past. I know that I am the more experienced of the two of us and I really don't want to tell him. I think he's slept with two women and while I love him and love the sex we have, he isn't as great as previous partners and I'm afraid he'll start to compare himself. I've had about five partners, seven if we're not just counting actual penetration. They've all been in serious relationships and one a marriage. I don't feel like this makes me a whore but I'm afraid he will view it that way. I feel like this is a normal number for a guy but maybe a little high for a woman? Should I just lie?", "summary": "I think my boyfriend will think I'm a slut if I tell him how many guys I've slept with. Do I have to be honest about everything?"}
{"id": "t3_29doss", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my ex[26 M] 1 year, need helps.....", "post": "We have been friends since we apart. This summer both of us are not as busy as when we were at school, so we have been texting each other very often. He always initiated the conversations. \n\nI can feel there still a thing between us, or maybe I just think too much..anyway, he is going to study abroad for two yeas at the end of September.  He told me he could not make plans for things after two years. \n\nAnd I know even if he likes me, he definitely will never let me know, because there is only two months left, he is just that kind of person. However, we probably would never be able to see each other after this summer-I'll go back to my hometown next year. I don't know if I should let him know my feelings, I'm not sure whether the result will hurt our friendship. \n\nAppreciate any help, thanks!", "summary": "He's going to study abroad within two month, and I'm not sure whether I should let him know I like him."}
{"id": "t3_34qgih", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [23M] get over my crush [23F] when she's genuinely my best friend?", "post": "Known her 8 months, love her to pieces. Absolutely believe she's pretty perfect for me in every way. Adoreee her.\n\nWe were kinda acting like a couple for about 4-5 months until a month or two ago when she had to deal with some personal stuff. It forced her to put \"us\" aside and since then we've been close and pretty much the same as ever, but not nearly as consistent.\n\nI think I need to get over her, but it's so fucking hard because she still acts the same way she always did around me. I feel like I can't be friends with her because she was or is in love with me and I'm in love with her but for some reason there's always something preventing us from committing to each other.\n\nI can't seem to justify cutting off such a close friend for \"feelings\" in my head but it's so painful every day wishing she'd just tell me she loved me out of the blue.", "summary": "Feel like I should be cutting off my best friend because I'm in love with her but I can't justify it."}
{"id": "t3_3bi9xy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my boyfriend [23 M] of two years, making me jealous of his friends", "post": "So my SO and I have been together for two years and a bit, we're pretty close and I've never met someone quite like him. He's proposed to me, and am now engaged. But to the meat of the story... SO got quite sick for the last few months and I was his primary caregiver during that time, he wasn't able to work or do much without assistance. He was on heavy medications as well. So now he's feeling much better, meds are gone, he's basically back to normal. I get a message this morning as I go into work that he's made a picture -SO is an artist- for his friend who helped him while he was sick. The friend had drawn him something a week prior to this and he basically exploded with gratitude and happiness -I'm an artist too and drew a few things for him while he was sick but never received the reaction his friend got- so to say it stung that, despite everything I'd done for him, all the time, effort, pain and hard work I'd been through just for him. I'm not even the first one he does anything for. \n\nI know I sound petty, but the months he was sick were probably the hardest of my life. I had to maintain my job, plus take care of him. I even ended up getting sick myself with a stress induced attack once. \n\nAm I really being a petty jealous girlfriend? ;-;", "summary": "Boyfriend gave his friend a gift art after he was sick as a thank you, but skipped over me who was his caregiver for that time. Am I petty?"}
{"id": "t3_2bhzup", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my SO [19M] need advice on handling/coping with anxiety to move forward.", "post": "My SO and I just solidified our relationship. It began while he was finishing up the lease with his ex. I met her, and explained that we would be dating, as I didn't want to be the 'other woman', and wanted everything to be cut, dry and clear.\n\nShe understood, and it was three months of dating, helping him pack, find an apartment, etc. Now, yesterday we gathered the final things from his place, and she went insane. Constant calls, emails, texts, Facebook, calling me every name in the book. We've blocked her on all accounts, and I understand her anger. Should she have accepted I was not a fling sooner? Sure, but I don't control other people.\n\nNow, my fear now, is that he's going to regret moving out and away. The relationship was over before me, as it was physically abusive. He'd often come over my house with black eyes, or bruises from where she'd attack him. My fear stems from the past of being cheated on, and knowing the hold an abusive relationship can have, having been in one before.\n\nI should note I'm probably borderline narcissistic. I spent my teenage years with crippling low self-esteem, and built myself back up to a very confident woman. But, this brings back the old feelings of my abusive relationship, where the ex was a prominent figure. I told my SO this, and he understands and assures me and takes everything in stride despite the high-stress of moving and whatnot.\n\nSo I would like to know if you have any suggestions on how I can face this like a proper adult, and not worry, trying only to focus on moving forward in my relationship? I have very little knowledge with coping skills and resources pertaining to anxiety, and was just looking for a bit of insight.", "summary": "Any advice or coping skills to overcome anxiety stemming from an old, abusive relationship, so that I can move forward with my current one, is highly appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_39kvu8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (23f) boyfriend (27) is upset that I post on gonewild and that there's nudes of my ex in our fb chat shared photos history.", "post": "Okay, so he's known for a while that I post there. He mentioned it months ago that if we were to date, he would only be okay with topless pictures, but I completely forgot about that conversion because I'm a flake.  We haven't been together long, so I didn't even think about talking to him about it before I posted again. I've been posting there for a while, and I'm used to my ex being okay with it. I admit that I fucked up here. I should've talked to him about it. \n\nLast night I posted a picture that I had saved in me and my exes fb chat history shared photos, so I had the app open to that. In those pictures,  there were naked pictures of him as well. My bf now thinks that i was intentionally saving nudes from my ex, which isn't the case. \n\nI honestly felt that I had nothing to hide,  which is why I'm not mad that he went through my phone. The only reason he went through my phone was to close out the apps that i had open as he plugged in my dying phone. I'm not upset that he snooped. \n\nSo how do I go about fixing this?  He's really upset with me about all this.", "summary": "Bf is mad about finding that i post on gw and that i have an exes picture in our fb chat shared photos."}
{"id": "t3_4sxwla", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "(F) Pain/Constipation Since Surgery 10yrs Ago", "post": "I'm asking for my girlfriend... struggling to find the appropriate place. \n43, F, 5'0\", 170lbs, White (Non Latino), 10 yrs, abdominal, previous cysts & hysterectomy, no current meds\n\nAround 10 years ago, she had surgery to remove a cyst (I forget what it's called, but she explained it as basically a fetus that ends up growing as a cyst - we weren't together then, so that's the best I can do). This was performed at a rural hospital, and poorly apparently. They told her that during the surgery, they accidentally nicked an artery or vein, and had trouble stopping the bleeding. The surgeon at the time told her that she had to use very large sutures, and following, she had bleeding for at least a couple weeks. Ever since then, she has had irregular bowel movements - in that, she is often constipated for days. Presently, she does show some signs of potential gall bladder issues, but the symptoms in question predate this by years. She has been dealing with abdominal pain and constipation since the surgery. I am wondering if it's possible that this surgical mishap could have cut off some blood flow to the intestines or some other part of the excretory system resulting in the symptoms... but researching this has been difficult. I understand medical terms, but my searches have mostly turned up home remedies for constipation. She has taken stool softener to minor effect, and magnesium citrate to almost no effect. Any ideas are appreciated.\n\nThere is a long history as to why she hasn't pursued the matter previously, but it's beyond the scope of the issue at hand.", "summary": "Girlfriend suffers abdominal pain and constipation since surgery 10 years ago where surgeon admitted to nicking an artery/vein."}
{"id": "t3_1rq61z", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Really like this girl, want her to know that I am interested in physically dating her someday. But for today we live really far away. What should I do?", "post": "So I met her more than a year ago. Just casually through online friends who played the same games I did. We immediately had a lot of in common, we played games, always had something to talk about, talked on Skype for more than 12 hours a day, everyday. And we at least talk 3-4 hours a day still. I really like her but I live in a different state. \nShe is very complicated because of her past but that's what I love about her. Everything that makes her who she is right now. And I really just want to say that I love her and would love to see it go further. But because of us living so far away I know there's not a whole lot of further. But I keep reading about people doing this kind of stuff and I was just wondering what reddit had to say about this.\n\nTo sum it up, as of now we are very close friends who care about each other a lot. I obviously want more. And I don't know what she wants. How do I proceed? ( As of now I have no means of travelling there and seeing her, I will obviously will be able to do it later in life, but I don't want to miss this chance. Because I really like her.)", "summary": "Girl I like very much lives in another state, I still want to date her. I don't want to be friend zoned. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_29wiev", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my boyfriend [28M] 1 year, I found a troubling email in my boyfriend's account and I don't know what to do...", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year now and everything has been absolutely perfect.  I love him more than anything.  His birthday is on Tuesday and we are going to a baseball game.  I wanted to surprise him by having the scoreboard display a happy birthday message from me.  He had logged into his email on my computer the day before, so I went in to find our ticket confirmation to see our seat numbers so that the camera would pan to him when the message came up.  So I went in with zero intention of snooping, I swear.  I noticed he had an email from an old friend of his in the trash (he has mentioned this friend a couple times, mostly about how he kind of \"disappeared\" a couple years ago and they haven't really talked since.  Curiosity got the better of me and I opened it.  His \"friend\" had written him an explicit email about his sexual fantasies about my boyfriend and about how he has great memories of fucking my boyfriend.  My boyfriend didn't reply to the email, but (and I know this is bad) I looked at phone.  All I saw was a text from my boyfriend to this guy asking him to \"delete the pictures\" my boyfriend sent him the other night.  I'm freaking out.  My boyfriend is asleep now and I really don't know what to do.  Help :(", "summary": "Boyfriend receives sexually explicit email from old friend.  Checked his phone and there was only a text asking the friend to delete pictures."}
{"id": "t3_2zyogm", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being a pervert", "post": "First, let me preface by saying this was 5 years ago and I was a messed up person. Also I fully understand why everything I did is super stalker-ish/horrible.\nI was taking care of my friend's dog at their house when they were on vacation. and this friend I think is hella hot BTW. \nSo being the creep and violator of trust I am, I go into their room and use some of her panties to jerk off on her bed. I finish off into the toilet later to avoid a mess and put everything away. \nThat night, at home, I was changing when I realized that my dick hurt like hell and was super itchy and sore. I didn't realize her bed was covered in cat hair, which I'm allergic to. I didn't know they even had a cat", "summary": "Dogsitting for a hot friend and used her panties to jerk off on her cat hair covered bed and had an allergic reaction on my junk"}
{"id": "t3_3mlwg3", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "~190k in student loans. Should I refinance?", "post": "I have around ~$190,000 in federal loans at an average rate of 6.6%. I haven't consolidated yet, so I have loans ranging anywhere from 5% to 7.9%.  I work in law and will be making $175k (pre-tax including bonus) my first year (the salary increases lock-step each year). My original plan was to get onto PAYE as a safety net, but aggressively pay down the loans within 4-5 years (focusing on the higher interest rate loans first), while still contributing to a 401K and Roth IRA. \n\nI'm wondering, however, whether refinancing is a better call. My credit score is in the mid-700s, so I think I'd be able to obtain a solid rate. I was thinking of going with something like variable over 10 years (given that when the Fed does increase rates, it will be slow and gradual -- plus, I can just refinance to fixed if absolutely needed). Is this a good idea? What rates would this make sense at? I did some quick number crunching, and over a 4-5 year period (assuming the bank allows me to prepay without penalty), it would save me around $12-15k in interest. \n\nMoreover, which company is best? For instance, I know SoFi requires that you be admitted to the bar before refinancing, whereas other companies do not. I'm naturally a risk averse person, but if refinancing is objectively the right call, it would hard to pass up.", "summary": "$190k in debt at 6.6%; $175k salary (pre-tax + bonus; increases every year). Worth it to refinance? If so, where?"}
{"id": "t3_1rvhhv", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Who would have guessed, I could need your advice.", "post": "I'm a 21 year old male and I currently live at home.\nLast week, when I was home alone, a girl rang at my door, she 19, lets call her N. She was jobbing as a Representative for a Society for Nature Conservation. It was very cold outside, she asked if she could come in. As my room looked somewhat like Dresden '45, I routed her to the kitchen and offered her a tea to warm herself up. So we both sat down and started talking. After I signed the contract for the Nature Conservation thingy, we talked for quite a while about everything and we had a lot in common, so there was no awkward silence and we laughed a bit. At this point I'm not quite sure, I had the feeling we connected on some level, but I'm such a lousy flirter, that I think I could have missed one or another thing^^.\n But everything seemed against us having a undisrupted conversation, the door rang like 500 times, my brother came home, my grandfather came to visit (but disappeared without a word). Unfortunately my mother had to come home and start cooking. As my mother started to make mothery-awkward comments on our conversation, it grew more and more awkward, so in the end N said that she had to go working again. While I walked her to the door I thougt \"You have nothing to lose, say something goddamit!\". So I said a little bit awkward that it was a pleasure to meet her and if she should be bored on Sunday (her only free day), she could just give me a call and I would meet up with her and show her the town (she wasn't from here). I gave my phone number in the contract I signed, so technically she had access to it.\nYet there was no word from her since then. Now I could use your advice whether I should try to establish contact to her or not. I don't want to force anything and I know that I will let it go if nothing happens. But somehow I am sad that I never wanna see her again if I do nothing.\nSorry for the wall of text.", "summary": "met an interesting girl from another city, talked with her for a few hours and now thinking if I should try to establish contact with her"}
{"id": "t3_xq4ej", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Boyfriend is clingy. However, he has said twice he doesn't want a \"relationship\" anymore. I'm so confused.", "post": "Me, 18F. Him, 18M. Dating for 18 months, on and off. This is my first relationship, it's not his first but by far his longest.\n\n**\"I want to be with you, but I don't want a relationship.\"**\n\nMy boyfriend has said this to me twice. It's heartbreaking. He loves me and doesn't want to lose me, but can't \"handle the stress of relationship.\" We broke up for three months last year because he wanted a stress-free summer. He insists he was miserable, however, and we got back together in September. Now we're getting ready for college and he's started saying this. And I'm not sure how to interpret it, because when I asked what he meant, he clammed up.\n\nReddit, I need your help. I leave for college this week, he comes up the next. (Same college.) I half wonder if we'd be happier single, but when I mentioned this he begged me not to break up with him and began crying. I already know he won't let me end it without more crying, begging, and drama.\n\nPart of the reason he doesn't want to break up is he doesn't want to see me happy with another guy. He already said he wouldn't dump me, even if he wanted to, unless it was mutual because he doesn't want to be remembered as \"that guy.\"", "summary": "My boyfriend doesn't want a relationship, but doesn't want to lose me either. But he will not dump me because he doesn't want to be \"that guy.\" I'm not sure where to turn."}
{"id": "t3_e1sw1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear hackers of reddit", "post": "Around the world, second-hand dealers and pawn shops are required to report all of the information on the goods they buy to a corporation called Business Watch International (BWI). This company has a monopoly over their business, which is simply taking this information, putting it into a database, and allowing access to authority figures.\n\nThe way they get implimented is they shop their software around to police departments and cities, saying they'll give the software out free if statutes are written that requires second-hand dealers and pawn shops to use their service (which they charge for by transaction). \n\nFrom a moral standpoint, It's rather shady to send a bunch of people's information to one unified database housed in Canada. Particularly that their system is god-awful (It is based around use with Internet Explorer, and will not function on any other browser).\n\nFrom a democratic standpoint, there is no choice but to use this service for many shops and brokers. If that's no a clear and flagrant violation of  your rights, I don't know what is. Personal information such as ID numbers, phone numbers, serial numbers, and all other types of numbers and personally identifiable information is sent across this poorly protected (and, did I mention, basically mandatory) program.\n\nI feel that it would be healthy for the system in general to have BWI's database shaken up a bit. The access website for the US is", "summary": "the system used by law enforcement to keep tabs on pawn shops is dangerous and undemocratic, and BWIusa.com could use a good hacking*"}
{"id": "t3_2ru2y8", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Socially awkward. [28m] At what point is it alright to tell a girl how physically attractive I find her to be?", "post": "So I'm a bit socially awkward and have started online dating. I met up with a girl [23f] for a coffee. A younger girl than I might expect to date, but seemed like a nice girl, does a lot of volunteer work etc.  This was my first online dating meetup and for whatever reason I expected her to look much worse than her pictures. She showed up and I barely recognized her, she looked amazing. I was shocked. No handshake, no \"you look great\" probably just an open jaw and a stutter. She's not a super model with a 6 pack, but I find her very attractive. (I'm an ugly 5'10\" and 240#, with a great job and other redeeming qualities, not to seem too down on myself) \n  \n\n  \nAnyway, we had coffee, I never really recovered my composure and after 45min we really ran out of things to talk about and we left. No \"let's do this again\", just an awkward \"see ya\" and probably that same wide open jaw.  \n  \nSo, a few days later, I sent her a message online apologizing for not holding up my end of the conversation like I should have, and I basically said that I was a bit stunned when she showed up looking so great and looking into her green eyes left me a bit tongue tied. If she'd like to meet up again sometime I'd love to and if not I still enjoyed our coffee and conversation.  \n    \n\nShe messaged back and is willing to go out for a drink sometime, which really surprised me, based on how weird I felt I was on the first meeting.\n  \nSo here's my question: I've alluded to it in a message, but is it weird/creepy/unmasculine for me to tell her in person how attractive I find her to be and that I was a bit intimidated on our first meeting?\n\n.", "summary": "Was awkward on a first date with a very pretty girl. Possibly going on a second date. Can I tell her how attractive I find her while on a second date? Or is that creepy?"}
{"id": "t3_29iy93", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "What are some careers in the New York-metro area that are slow-paced, strategic, honest, yet lucrative?", "post": "I'm single and have two years of work experience. I have worked as a risk analyst in New York for a year and each day that I go to work I feel inauthentic- like I'm cheating myself. The paychecks are good, and that's a requirement for me, but I truly seek something more slow-paced, analytical, strategic, honest, and natural. I need more thinking, planning, strategizing, and team-working, way less customer service, blame, stress, thanklessness. I often have Walden Pond-esque fantasies, like picking up and living off the land, hiking the appalachian trail, and WWOOF'ing (likely a knee-jerk reaction to how disconnected I feel), but in this day and age, this economy, this area, and with my student loan debt (60k), I would have to sacrifice my lifestyle, my hopes of owning a home anytime soon, the opportunity to financially provide for a family, and the flexibility to make contributions towards savings and retirement. I'm a thoughtful, honest, philosophical, and natural business professional who just feels disconnected by the hours, the work-load, the stress, and the monotony of my job. It's unfulfilling, I'm too young to be trusted to use my brain, and everything just feels unnatural. I don't mind the business-world, I really just need the right fit. Any suggestions at all? I'm sure most of you have been working and feeling the way I do for more years than I've been alive, but it just doesn't feel right and I wonder if anyone's figured it out and made it better.", "summary": "I feel inauthentic in my life and career because my job is emotionally draining, I have a work-life imbalance, seek a more natural lifestyle, yet will not compromise on the paycheck and the geography."}
{"id": "t3_1ls8xb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[20M] with my GF [20F] duration, Reasonable or Overreacting?", "post": "I've posted this already in askmen, but here we go:\n\nI've been thinking over a situation I had with my gf and trying to figure out, as the title suggests, if I was being reasonable or overreacting. \n\nThe scenario: We are dates for a somewhat big deal type event at my frat (dressed up and whatnot), we both get buzzed while drinking--> she randomly disappears while we're doing an activity together and I wait for her--> I wait for the better part of 30 min --> I search around everywhere to find her, eventually find her in an empty hallway fixing the collar/clothes of another guy really intimately--> the guy and I have a history and he is a massive d-bag--> I play it cool and tell her I was looking for her, she's still drunk/the d-bag looks caught and like he knew exactly what he was doing, backs off accordingly--> my gf and I go to a private room and I tell her how annoyed I was that I had no idea where she was, that she didn't tell me text or otherwise where she was for 1/2 an hour, only for me to find her being intimate and touching a guy who I dislike a lot--> She starts crying--> after some more crying and her storming off for a bit, we eventually reconcile enough to enjoy the rest of the night.\nNow. Looking back on that night, she says that I overreacted and shouldn't have gotten upset/annoyed and that I partially ruined the night. I think that I shouldn't have had to look for my gf/date forever and then find her with another guy. What do you guys think?", "summary": "My gf/date disappears at a party for a long time without telling me, I find her with a guy who I dislike, I get annoyed and she thinks I overreacted."}
{"id": "t3_3pu5di", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Why do I still feel like Me [21 M] and my \"ex\" [20 F] were still meant to be? I don't like this feeling", "post": "She broke up with me, like about a year ago because, even though she still really liked me, \"we couldn't be together\" because of many issues I'm not getting into. Here are some facts:\n\n-only dated for 2 months, it wasn't even ever \"official\".\n-Never even got past 2 base, I liked to take things slow.\n-I tend to be fairly superficial usually so she was the first girl to whom I was attracted to mainly because of personality, hence why i took it slow.\n-When we first met everything went so natural, wasn't even trying to impress her like I usually do on dates, we were just having natural fun, mutual attraction and chemistry was there.\n\nSince we split up I saw other girls, dated one for about 6 months, sex was good, but eventually lost attraction, went on dates with others, etc. By now I should be over her, kind of am in a way, don't think about her all day everyday like I used to but it still really feels like, for some reason we were meant to be together, so much chemistry and things in common, same personality and similar backgrounds. Why am I feeling this way? I know we can't and won't be together, I live in a different town now, is this feeling supposed to 'mean' or indicate something?", "summary": "Dated girl for about 2/3 months a year ago, kind of moved on, saw other women, but still feel like we were made for each other lol. the fuck wrong with me"}
{"id": "t3_103i6t", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My landlord says I won't be able to keep the dog I've adopted because its a dangerous breed due to insurance canceling his policy. As of Oct. 31st in my state, that practice will become illegal. What can I do in the meantime?", "post": "I adopted a cane corso mutt and my landlord (mainly his wife) says we can't keep him. The dog is a gem. He is kind loving and sweet. He socialized with my landlords dog (also on the list of dangerous breeds) and they love each other. Playing and getting rowdy with each other makes both their days. He checked with his home owners insurance and they said they will drop him if we keep the dog, but as of Oct 31st that practice won't be allowed in my state (legislation being signed into law). I can't fathom letting this dog go. He is amazing. Do I have any options here, or is it a fruitless fight?\n\nHere he is", "summary": "My dog is amazing and I don't want to lose him, but due to insurance my landlord says he has to go. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_155lcv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[19] love my boyfriend[19] of about 15 months dearly but am not passionate about him anymore. I've never had a serious relationship and don't know if we should we break up. What do I do?", "post": "I've been considering this for quite some time, about three or four months. We've been together since last September, and met when we were living in the dorms as freshmen in August. He's my best friend and we do everything together, practically living together save for the 3 months of summer. But lately, my heart hasn't been in our relationship. We have sex considerably less and even if I'm aroused, I would rather just be alone. I've been seeking more time apart and crave time without him far more than I have before. Right now, we are in our respective homes during Christmas break (we're from different states), and I know I should be missing him, but I'm just... not. \n\nI've talked to him about the possibility of having an open relationship or going on \"break\", but he hates that idea because he says he loves me and doesn't want to give me up or see anyone else. He fights my every argument, and doesn't understand how I could feel this way when our relationship is \"perfect\".  Now, this is my first serious relationship, so I'm new to this too. I don't know how to go about the way I'm feeling or even if I decide to break up with him, how to do that without destroying our friendship? I can't imagine just severing ties with him.  Can I get some advice on how to deal with post-infatuation stage? How do I know our relationship is right?", "summary": "I'm feeling ambivalent about my relationship of 15 months when he clearly isn't and have the urge to be alone, but don't want to give up on our relationship (romantic or platonic). What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3o6s5b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [27 F] relationship with my [28 M] boyfriend has a cultural trusting problem?", "post": "Hello. I have never posted on reddit before. I am Korean (born and raised in Korea) and my boyfriend is hispanic-american. We have an issue for a long time which he thinks is big deal but I don't.  \nAnyways, many times, when we don't hang out or anything is a bit unusual, I ask \"are you cheating on me?\" Or, \"can I trust you?\" We have been together for four years and he has never cheated on me, but I just want reassurance. It makes me feel safe. Recently he is annoyed and says that \"it is insulting\" to ask. He points out that we have been together for a long time (5 years) so this really shouldn't even be a question. But to me, it is normal for Koreans.  \nSorry if it is confusing but I am not a native English speaker.", "summary": "Is asking \"Are you cheating on me?\" about once a month \"insulting\" like my boyfriend says, or normal? (and why?, I have little experience with non-korean dating before him)  "}
{"id": "t3_2t0y7p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with my ex bf [28M] 1 year broken up, can we be friends?", "post": "It has been 12 months since I have been with my ex bf. During that time he dated another girl and has since broken up with her.\n\nHe contacted me recently wanting a friend. Our relationship was good but we broke up because he didn't trust me and I didn't trust him. We had frequent mis understandings but we loved each other intensely. \n\nI saw him yesterday for the first time in 12 months as I thought I would be over him completely only to find I still have really strong feelings for him. We kissed, almost slept together. It wasn't planned. \n\nI wrote him an email saying I don't think I can see him again because I have feelings for him. I said I know he doesn't want a relationship right now but I cannot help the way I feel about him. I need another 12 months. \n\nHe wrote this email back: \n\n\"Hey so I got your messages. So you don't want to be friends for a another year? Is that what you are saying..... I thought it would be nice to keep in contact and be able to talk to eachother openly about our lives every now and then? Hmm\n\nThankyou for your email. I always liked reading you recount our days together.  I'm not sure how you really feel because you told me in person you didn't want to date yet in your email you speak as if we had potential to be together?\n\nI'd like you in my future. You are unlike anyone else I have ever met and I like that. However I have to stay guarded and I have to keep my distance I have been hurt one too many times lately and I don't think you realise how depressed I have been/am. I think it's best if you stick to what your head says. Mine tells me we can be friends and be there for eachother just not as often or as close as we used to...\n\nWhat do I do? Do I cut contact again or be friends with this guy? He says he only wants to be friends but why kiss me and try sleep with me?", "summary": "Ex bf split with his gf. Contacts me and I see him for the first time after 12 months. I still have feelings for him. He kisses me. Should we be friends?"}
{"id": "t3_3pmjwi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my current GF/EX [22 F] of 3 years. Want to know if breaking up is a good solution to anxiety/distance.", "post": "I've been in a relationship with my best friend for 3 years.  And now we aren't sure how to proceed.\n\nCurrently, we just finished college in May, and have not been able to see each other (hardly) at all.  The biggest problem is that our hours are opposite.  She works from at least 5pm to 11pm, Tuesday - Sunday w/ doubles on weekends, and I work an 8-5 M-F job.\n\nThis might be surmountable, but she has a serious anxiety complication.  While I can help her with it when we're together, being unable to communicate really makes it harder on her.  Add that to the fact that our intimacy has been flagging, and we're scared that we should break it off. \n\nHowever, we still really care for each other and don't want to lose our best friend.\n\n-----\n\nThat's where the complications happen, and where I'm requesting advice.\n\nIf we break it off, we put ourselves in the position of finding other people.  That means we can easily hurt each other more, or even hurt the people we are with (like if we aren't fully broken up, or if we decide to get back together with each other instead of the others).  If we don't break it off, then we (she especially) feel like we can't know whether we are right for each other, or if we will be able to stick through tough times in the future if we do end up together.\n\n------\n\nI know you can't tell me the \"right\" thing to do, but I was hoping you could give me your opinions.  We've just run this topic ragged in circles, and it isn't helping either of us feel any better about our position.  I really just want to hear some things we may not have considered.\n\nI'll be happy to provide more description in the comments, but I wanted to keep it short and simple for you.  I'll also tell her about this so she can add to it if she wants.  Her username is llamaears.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Relationship complications brought on by anxiety and distance.  We can't figure out if it's better to try to make things better while together or apart."}
{"id": "t3_14gwmh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How long should you wait before moving in together? [21m/20f]", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together about 6 months. Things have been going well and she hasn't thrown any red flags. I've been dating her a bit cautiously after a catastrophic relationship with my ex-girlfriend, and I'm afraid of making moves too fast.\n\nShe's a really good girl however, I thoroughly enjoy her company. She's smart, inspiring, and fun. \n\nOver the last couple of weeks, we've flirted with the idea of living with each other since she basically lives with me already, meaning that she's only at her place when she's going to school. After school, I pick her up, and we spend the rest of our time at my place.\n\nSo, how soon is too soon?", "summary": "I [21m] have been in a relationship with my gf [20f] for 6 months, considering moving the gf in since she is always at my house and I feel really good about her."}
{"id": "t3_4ugv0a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Confused about my [21/F] ex-boyfriend [22/M] who is also my best friend", "post": "Me and my ex-boyfriend broke up about a month ago because we were long-distance. We'd been together for about a year with an 8 hour time difference. He told me he couldn't handle being so far apart from me anymore and it was causing him a lot of stress. I felt the same way too; I had a lot of anxiety, and so we decided to stay as friends. We still talked regularly as if nothing had changed, except that we cut the \"I love you's\" and pet names. But 2 weeks ago I found out that he has a new girlfriend. I was more upset about the fact that he didn't tell me about it. I suppose because we were friends now we could talk about anything, especially about something as major as that. He said he was afraid to \"lose\" me if he'd told me.\n\nHe still talks to me regularly. I try to avoid him when I can now. I thought he'd rather focus on his new relationship, and so I started talking to a guy on Tinder. We'd meet regularly, mainly for sex. At some point I just forgot to check my phone so I was avoiding calls and texts from my ex. He then asked me if he'd done something wrong because he felt that I was avoiding him. \n\nWhen I told him I was seeing someone, he became really upset/jealous and even said that I deserve better than a guy who just wants to fuck me. We talked for 3 hours about this, and he admitted that he still has feelings for me, that he really loves me but the distance is holding us back. He said his girlfriend is great but not as \"amazing\" as me.  He missed the connection we had. I feel the same way. And now I think we're equally confused. We're not going to stop seeing our new partners because we'll just go back to square one.\n\nJust at a loss of what to do here. Should we go NC? (it's going to hurt so much) Should I pay him a visit and try again?", "summary": "Ex broke up with me a month a go because distance. We're seeing new people but still very into each other. Not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4a7ehv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] with my GF? [23 F] 1 year, she went to a wedding reception I wasn't allowed to go to and ended up at a strip club (there now) how the heck do I react to that?", "post": "Title pretty well sums it up.  The reason I wasn't allowed to go was because her friend was marrying someone with ties to her ex's family.  Her ex wasn't there but she didn't want it to be awkward.\n\nI have gotten a few texts over about 8 hours.  Asked how I was doing at 8:30, told me I was amazing at 10:30.  I asked her about midnight if she was going to stop by afterwards, she responded at 1:30 that we would see, she's at a strip club.  \n\nI really have no idea who she is with, what club, anything.  Obviously she is at least drunk, if not on something else.", "summary": "Girlfriend went to wedding reception without me, got drunk, ended up at strip club with I don't know who."}
{"id": "t3_4d3ie0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my Girlfriend [19 F] of 5 months, she's not sure if she'll break up with me or not, what do I do in the mean time?", "post": "Before we left for our easter break (we're at university together). I had a go at her by telling her in a calm but unsympathetic way that I felt trapped by her and that I felt pressurised by her to always pretend I was OK even when I wasn't. After I pulled myself together and comforted her (She cried) I told her we should take a short break after the end of the week and not contact each other over Easter.\n\nAbout 2 weeks into the three week break I texted her a long, heartfelt message telling her I loved her and missed her. I received back a 1 line \"love you too.\" After messaging her on and off for 2 days I sent her a similar message and received a similar answer. I asked to Skype and she told me over Skype that since I had talked to her she had felt disconnected from me. She then said she wasn't sure what she wanted and she would let me know when she sees me face to face. I told her I want to start fresh and have a healthier relationship. We also both agreed that we love eachother.\n\nWhat I want advice on is what I should do to keep myself sane in the intervening week. I know I want to work things out and try to see if we can have a better relationship that doesn't make me feel trapped. Also, how should I go about convincing her to stick with me a little longer to find out if we can make it work? should I try to convince her at all? Finally, if she does dump me, is it appropriate to ask to be fuck buddies? because the sex is super amazingly good.\n\nNot a very exciting post but need advice, thanks for reading to the end.", "summary": "She might be about to break up with me, what do I do? convince her to stay, leave her, or just wait and see?"}
{"id": "t3_2yylxj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19f] Friend [19f] Talks Down on My Boyfriend [19m]", "post": "I've been dating my boyfriend for 6 months and one of my best friends always says negative stuff about him and it really bothers me. He is into fashion and acting, he dresses and acts kind of \"feminine\" but he is completely heterosexual.\n\nMy friend would joke around about him secretly being gay, when we first started dating. I tried to make light of it, and I thought it would just fade away the longer I dated him.\n\nIt's not fading away, and she keeps saying rude things about him to me, and has even done so right infront of him. Today I pretty much blew up at her because of how mean she was being, she made a comment about his jeans being too skinny and asked if he even has a dick and how it would fit, Mind you, she was wearring baggy sweats. And she is a sloppy person, and I got pissed at her and pretty much told her she was dressed like a hobo, she's too fat to wear nice clothes and she looks like shit. I do feel guilty about saying it, but she has been saying extremely rude things about him for months and I can't stand it anymore. \n\nShe left after I said that and I haven't texted her or anything since, I don't know if I really plan on it, even if she reaches out to me first. Was I in the wrong or is she?", "summary": "My friend insults my boyfriend all the time and she always makes jokes about his sexuality, I blew up at her after a really rude comment she made about him today and now her and I aren't speaking."}
{"id": "t3_1t6zux", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do deal with jealousy?", "post": "I'm in a relationship of almost 3 months and it's amazing. I love my gf so much. But this problem keeps arising... I'm constantly jealous. The issue is that this is all the time. If she laughs at another guys joke I get jealous of that guy. If she gets help from another guy, I get jealous. If she is alone with another guy, I get really jealous. Now keep in mind this barely happens because she doesn't have a lot of friends... But she does have one who is very close. He is a male of the same age as her and everyday they have a class together in which they spend the time having a good time, just the two of them. She and this guy have been best friends since childhood. She isn't someone to cheat and I know she never would but whenever she is there with him I get jealous to the point where I feel sick to my stomach and I feel depressed. A lot of the time we have boring texting conversations... But amazing time when we are together. I often feel like I'm not enough. \nHow do I make the jealousy go away?", "summary": "I often feel jealous anytime were around men together and she has a really close guy friend who makes me especially jealous. I want to stop being jealous"}
{"id": "t3_3rsxjl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 F] looked at my bf [22 M] of 3 years facebook messages", "post": "To start off, I've never looked at his phone, FB, anything until the other day. \n\nAfter a few instances that made it seem like he was messing around (we talked about it and his excuses made complete sense so I looked past it), I got paranoid. The other day he gave me the password for his computer. I tried it on his facebook and got in. \n\nI looked at his messages and found a conversation between him and this girl. Last summer we had gotten in a huge fight while he was out at a bar with his friends and he got really drunk. Well he messaged a girl and basically told her we had gotten in a fight and asked her to fuck but he was really drunk. They didn't do it because she didn't reply to the message until a day or so later just asking what had happened. This was well over a year ago but it hurts to think that he even asked. \n\nIt is my fault for snooping and I have no one to blame but myself. It was very wrong and completely regret it but feel very hurt for what I found.", "summary": "I looked at my boyfriend's facebook messages and found a conversation between my drunk bf and a girl asking her to have sex with him."}
{"id": "t3_1azscq", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Fuck you Emblem Health", "post": "A little long, but this reddit is for ranting right? So here it goes.\n\nMy fiancee has a herniated disc in her back along with a pinched nerve. As you can imagine, it's extremely painful and has significantly impacted her quality of life. Things have gotten bad over the last few months. Back surgery is out because we can't afford it and insurance didn't cover it (the first fuck you). A back doctor recommended a procedure called a discectomy (it's kind of like surgery, but not as invasive).\n\nAfter us and the back doctor talking to insurance we find out it's approved. Yes! However, they have one caveat that she can't get anesthesia (second fuck you) making the procedure painful, but hey a lot of pain for a short period of time is worth it if it helps her back (and she's been in crucial pain for months anyway).\n\nThis was all booked and ready to go back in January for this Thursday. We've been eagerly awaiting this day because it means she will be able to walk without being in pain. \n\nThen, the big fuck you happens. After getting approvals and confirmations MULTIPLE times from the insurance company. They called today and told my fiancee that they don't cover it after all. No reason why other than that \"we thought we did, but this isn't a procedure that we cover apparently\". This after we had a date booked for 2 months.  Now we don't know what to do. She's crying in the bathroom because she feels so defeated. Epidurals and pain meds haven't helped the situation and this was the light at the end of the tunnel. FUCK YOU EMBLEM. You guys are incompetent greedy fuckers.", "summary": "Emblem approved my fiancee's back procedure two months ago. Two days before the procedure, they changed their mind and she has to continue living in agony."}
{"id": "t3_v12mu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it legal to tow a car that is not illegally parked?", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nMy two roommates and I have been living in a house for about 6 months now. Today we had our first run in with our neighbor (who owns a tow truck) across the street. Our friend came over and parked his car along the curb in front of our neighbors house. When he goes to leave we discover that the neighbor has parked his son's truck inches from our friends rear bumper and his tow truck was parked really close in front. Our friend was basically boxed completely in. We went to knock in the door (we figured it was an accident or something) then out comes our fat neighbor screaming and yelling. He claims that we cannot park in front of his house (it is a public street), and that next time he will tow the car. We tell him that's illegal and he threatens a \"neighbor war\" with us, which is something he will lose (we are all in college). Is it legal to tow a car that is parked perfectly legal? We live in Nevada if that matters. We have considered parking another car there and then letting him tow it, but also secretly film it, good idea?", "summary": "Neighbor with tow truck threatens to tow our friend because he parked on the street in front of his house. Is it legal to tow a legally parked car?"}
{"id": "t3_t1ayk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Please, somebody help me identify who this author is", "post": "Long story short my parents a long time ago gave me a large paperback collection of like 500 pages and around 5 stories from this bald author who made super irreverent children's novels and I wanted to find out who the author was for my sister who is now the same age as I was (6th grade)\n\nDescription of work: I'll write what I remember from memory. One kid was able to see two separate worlds and had an obsession with a chili that was made at this one place and kept going back and forth between a block where the chilli was made. Another was a coney island hot dog shop or something and they were entered into an intergalactic food competition? Another was a kid discovers an underground subculture at night and there is a park where anybody can get up on a pedestal and give a speech about whatever they want and there was a girl obsessed with radios and equipment.Those are a few of the stories briefly from memory. Thanks so much for me and my sister because I'd totally like to read them again", "summary": "magic delicious chilli with alternate demensions, intergalactic food contest, underground speech giving subculture. Name that children's author."}
{"id": "t3_3p9crs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my Girlfriend [23 M] 3 years, After a great relationship, and both of our lives headed in the right direction, she decided to break up with me out of nowhere. Do I leave her be, and just get on with my life?", "post": "We have had a wonderful relationship. She has OCD and I have Bipolar. A year into the relationship I got on medicine which made my life a hell of a lot better. I am now goin to school, I work and im trying to get out on my own. My girlfriend just got on medicine and is now going to counseling. Everything seemed to be going great. She is also attending college. \n\nThis past Sunday we had a wonderful day out on the bay. Everything seemed to be great. It gets me upset just writing it. The life we wanted seemed to be falling into place.  But then Tuusday came; I went to school, and I went to call her after. She never answered. It wasnt until later that night she said she wanted a break, and that she wants to sort her life out. It came out of nowhere and I guess thats what hurts the most. She said there isnt anyone, which I dont know is true. I know her and she doesn't lie, but maybe she just doesn't want to hurt me.\n\nMy brother and her haven't had the greatest relationship, and my mom and her did get in a fight,recently, but I dont think thats enough reason to break up. We also have had our fair she of arguments, but they normal arguments; people arent going to be happy 24/7.\n\n We have been planing out our lives together, and it really hurts knowing its not going to happen now.\n\nShe never said break up, But I cant wait for her, and she did say  she wants me to move on and doesnt want me to wait, and hopes that I stay in school.", "summary": "After a great relationship, and both of our lives headed in the right direction, she decided to break up with me out of nowhere. What should I do? Do I leave her be, and just get on with my life?"}
{"id": "t3_3q9t6z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[17 M] I just got over a breakup and now I'm not sure what to do.", "post": "So I just got over a breakup, and that's swell.  I'm not entirely sure what to do now though.  I'm stuck in highschool for another semester until I can get into college, and I feel like there aren't more fish in the sea.  I've already dated a myriad of girls, sexted a bunch more, and now I really have no idea how to find another girl for a go at a long-term (at least until college) relationship.  I've already taken my chances with all the girls I'm interested in in my classes and whom I've met at lunch.  So how can I go about meeting new people in my last year here?", "summary": "I've overfished and now I'm not sure how to go about finding more fish (potential partners) for the rest of my short tenure here in highschool."}
{"id": "t3_4wek49", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my bf [21M], he lets his best friend [21M] be overly sexual with me", "post": "My boyfriend's best friend is visiting my boyfriend in the college town where we both live for a week or so. I have been with my bf for 2.5 years and he has been friends with this person since high school. My problem is that when I am hanging out with my bf and his friend, the friend will be extremely touchy with me. For example he will kiss me in front of my bf, touch my ass/boobs, try to cuddle me when I am trying to study, etc. He also makes comments about me getting naked or about having sex with me. In the past my bf and I had a threesome with this friend when we were drunk. My bf was very uncomfortable after this happened and we established that it would never happen again. Before this happened the friend did not act like this or make sexual comments. This is the first time he has acted like this towards me and it makes me feel very awkward. When he does these things I either tell him to stop, ask my bf to tell him to stop, or just get up and move somewhere else. However, my bf says that \"since he's already seen you naked\" and \"since you've already sucked his dick\" it doesn't matter what he does/says to me. When I tell the friend directly to stop he tells me that I'm being mean and my bf then expects me to apologize. This is my bfs best friend so I am reluctant to make a big deal about it and potentially cause problems between me and my bf or between my bf and his friend. My question is, how do I approach this subject with my bf/do I approach it at all or just stay silent? Not spending time with them is not a great option since in the we have been hanging out frequently and they will ask awkward questions if I just disappear for a few days.", "summary": "bfs best friend is making me a bit uncomfortable with his comments/actions and I don't know how to handle it"}
{"id": "t3_3k83w2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22M] need advice on whether or not I should end my 6 year relationship with my gf [22F]", "post": "My gf and I have been together for 6 years, in that time we have had 2 serious break ups (one lasting a week, and the next two weeks). The longer break up was last December.\n\nEssentially, I don't think I'm happy with our relationship. When I think about the person I would want to marry I don't see her. But I love her and absolutely hate to cause her pain... She already has more than enough stress and physical pain in her life. She has chronic health problems that cause her a lot of pain. She is unable to go to school or keep a job with her heath issues. She desperately wants to be better, and I want that for her too. But the person I envision marrying is someone more independent like I am, who does what she wants to do in life, a leader not a follower... And I sort of feel like a jerk for feeling this way... But as Ted Mosby says: there is no worth in settling in a relationship.\n\nSo I guess really I have the answer to my question, and I have for a while. I am just scared to do it, and I don't know how. I really don't have a lot of experience breaking up in an effective way.", "summary": "I don't want to marry my gf of 6 years, but I still love her. What should I do and how?"}
{"id": "t3_3yztb2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M], and tinder date [18 F], had our first meet/date, but not attracted to her", "post": "So about two weeks ago I met a girl on Tinder. We hit it off fairly quickly and began texting each other. A lot. We texted all day everyday for two weeks. Today, we finally met up. \n\nBefore I get into that, let me just say that while texting, she sort of fell for me. I like her, too, but still, I hadn't met her so I didn't know how much. I had told her I was looking for more than a hookup, and she said the same. She kept telling me how self conscious she is of her body, how much weight she's gained, and would send me pics of her asking if I was okay with her body. In the pics she sent me, she did seem a little chubby, but still very cute. I reassured her that I found her attractive, because from the pics, I really did.\n\nOn to our date. We had a great time together. Spent about 10 hours in total, including some heavy making out and fooling around. The problem is, she's a lot heavier than I had been anticipating. So much so, that I am just not that attracted to her, and had trouble staying hard when we were fooling around.\n\nWe didn't have sex, because she said she wanted to wait until we were \"official\" as if it was inevitable (and I'll admit, through texting, I thought it was inevitable as well). I just don't know what to do. She's already asking me what to do for our next date, and talking about future plans together, and I'm just kind of going along with it because I'm terrified of hurting an already very self-conscious person. She's such a nice girl, and I feel like if I told her I wasn't feeling it, it would just destroy her. She told me it was the best date she's ever had, and one of the best days of her life. Help me, please :(", "summary": "Not really attracted to Tinder girl, she's very sweet and I don't know how to let her down without hurting her"}
{"id": "t3_16d0wz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "M[21] unhappy in my relationship with F[22].", "post": "I've (M[21]) been in a relationship for a year and a half with F[22] and it really has never gone well.  I think we want different things and we are not overly compatible.  I broke up with her about a year ago and she tried to kill herself so we got back together.\n\nThis week I met an F[19] who I think I'm really compatible with.  She and I talked for a few hours and we have a lot in common.  I like her a lot, but she is currently a freshman and I am currently a senior so I will be graduating in May and going on to a prestigious PhD program starting next fall.\n\nSo here are my questions:\n* What should I do in regards to my current relationship?  I know I need to end it, but I just don't know how.\n* What should I do in regards to the other girl?\n* Do you think my feelings for the other girl stem from my distaste for my current relationship?\n\nI appreciate any help you give me.", "summary": "M[21] Relationship not working and not sure if feelings I have for a new girl are because of my current failing relationship."}
{"id": "t3_3tpknt", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being a Korean rapper", "post": "Long time lurker, first time poster yada yada. So like the trend this did not happen today, happened maybe 2 weeks ago. Over the period of summer, a sudden boredom hit me while listening to  music and I decided it would be fun to make a rap song although I knew it would be shitty but was just between me and my friends no biggie.\n Over the course  of remaining year I would continue making shitty rap songs where my best one so far ended up being a lovey-dovey freestyle about no one but used a certain girl as a description of the girl in the song. \n\n**Now  to the the fuck up**\n\n My buddy and I were chilling in his car and decided to listen to it again when suddenly the girl I used to describe in the song walks over. He calls her over without thinking( If you're reading this I hate you) and tells her about my new rap career  and has her listen. Everybody's laughing and smiling but I knew it was coming. The description of EXACTLY her begins and her expression changes to a blank one and then my friend makes a comment about it sounds like I'm taking shots at her boyfriend. I still can't look her in eye when she calls me rapper now.", "summary": "Rap career made a gorgeous girl think I was either taking shots at her boyfriend and saying she needs a good man or I'm in love with her when she's outta my league."}
{"id": "t3_49zxhc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] having trouble trusting my boyfriend [21 M]", "post": "I recently found out that for a majority of my six month relationhsip with my boyfriend, he's been on and off chatting up other girls on facebook and okcupid. \n\nHe says he never intended to cheat and that he couldn't have and what's more he says he realizes now that he loves me, he told me for the first time a couple weeks ago. He says he didn't realize what he had and he took me for granted. He says he doesn't deserve me but that he's so lucky I've forgiven him. He says he thought he doesn't deserve to be happy and that he was afraid to fall in love again. \n\nAll he ever did was chat with other girls, flirt, and ask them to hang out or hookup. He hung out with two girls but says nothing happened and I completely believe him on that. \n\nI'm wondering if maybe it could be true that he was just cheating because he was scared of a serious relationship? I really want to believe he won't cheat again and he's completely changed in the way he treats me since he realized he loves me, but I've just heard so many stories about how people never really stop cheating. But he never physically cheated so I'm wondering if my situation is different? \n\nAny advice would be much appreciated! Thank you so much!", "summary": "My boyfriend had thoughts of cheating but never actually did anything sexual. Is it possible he truly loves me now and won't be tempted again?"}
{"id": "t3_405c1f", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm 18/m I don't know what to do about my Dad", "post": "My biological father and I have had a lot of issues he and my mother got a divorce when I was ten, it was hard on my family and me. My older brother has had bad experiences with him, and has decided not to talk to him anymore for the most part. My younger brother was about two years old when the divorce happened. My father is a retired marine served a tour during the first gulf war and is manipulative and greedy and he also has PTSD. He helped me a bit when I first started suffering from depression and at the same time he had still been trying to tell me how to live my life he tried to force me to join the  airforce and he was just not an entirely good father. At one point he also was upset with me and my mother and decided he wasn't coming to my graduation which caused tension with my mother and I. He eventually came and tried being Mr. Dad all of a sudden he was whoopin and yelling and cheering me on all of a sudden. He ran out on me and my younger brother he ran away to another state to live with his parents and doesn't pay child support and it feels like he is always trying to make me choose between him and my mother and it honestly tears me apart inside.", "summary": "My biological father who ran out on me usually tries to make me choose between him and my mother and I have a ton of issues with him I don't know whether or not it is worth it to have a relationship anymore"}
{"id": "t3_tou2v", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "My ex cheated on me so I broke up with her. Now everyone is pissed at me because she's telling everyone she got raped", "post": "I think this would be better in /r/relationships, but the mod told me to post this here.\n\nI'm 24m and she's 23. We were together for 3 years. We did plan to get married. I hadn't proposed, but I was having a custom ring made to propose. Good thing this came out early and saved me $10K on the ring and howevermuch on the wedding, I guess.\n\nTwo weeks ago she went out drinking with friends on a Friday night and ended up sleeping with some guy she met at the bar. She told me about it once she saw me and I dumped her on the spot. \n\nFortunately my name was the only one on the lease and I could afford rent by myself, so she moved out immediately.\nObviously I was - and still am - taking the breakup hard, but I knew it was for the best. Then, the next thing I know all my friends and family are mad at me. She went around telling everyone that the guy she slept with raped her, and they decided I'm a bad person for dumping her for getting raped.\n\nI can't talk sense into any of them. We ran in the same social circles pretty much and she was really close to my family, so I'm getting pissed on by everyone. What am I supposed to do? Is just letting it blow over best?", "summary": "My ex cheated on me, I broke up. She's now telling everyone she was raped, so everyone hates me. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_eqn1l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So I failed my first term in University with the lowest average among my classmates, what should I do, reddit?", "post": "I studied in Canada for 3 years now and worked hard to get into a really good university for Engineering. My entire family consisted of only engineers, except for my mother side - who were teachers and medical doctors. \nMy parents and older brother put a lot of hope in me and want me to become successful. They were really happy when I got into University. I've been struggling though, and I didn't want to worry them as my parents are in their 50s and my brother is already working as well. He graduated from the same university I am in right now and is very successful in his job. \n\nThus, being the youngest and least experienced person in the family, I decided to tell them that everything is ok (it's not).\n\nI struggled in Linear Algebra and Physics the most. So I spent a lot of time (maybe a bit too much) in studying them and putting all assignments behind - worrying only about midterms and finals. I overworked sometimes and fell asleep in lectures, late for lectures, etc. I know it's stupid, being only a first year engineering student and already failing.\n\nWhen midterm arrived, I studied with friends most of the time. But although I understand and was able to solve problems - when the midterms came - I couldnt process any of the given questions to answer them. Same thing happened on finals - I studied every day with friends, but my result was unbearably humiliating.\n\nAs for how I study with friends, we each finish a list of questions and problems individually. Once we are all done, we cross-examine one another's works and correct each other's mistakes in discussions.\n\nNow, I failed my first term with the worst average in the class, that is - way below the passing mark. My family did not know about this and they are celebrating Christmas together, as my brother has just got off work. I am going home soon and does not know what to say to my family. I do not want to make them sad - my parents have not seen me for 3 years and my bro for 4 years. As we study/work overseas (specifically - in Canada).", "summary": "I failed my first term in University because I was too naive. My family have high hopes in me, I don't want to ruin their Xmas reunion with my brother. What should I do, reddit?"}
{"id": "t3_2c34by", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by giving my muslim friend pork", "post": "This was about 2 years ago but its a pretty large fuck up. So that day I had a friend stay over at mine and the morning after we went for some breakfast. Theres a bunch of chinese food stalls near where I live and I recommended them for some noodles. He says \" yeah sure as long as its halal\" ( since he was muslim and infact a strongly devoted one too) . I wasn't thinking and assured him that the food was 100% safe for him to eat. \n\nNext thing were eating the noodles and some pork.He's munching away at the pork with no knowledge that it is actually pig meat. He keeps saying that the food here is amazing and the meat is really really good etc etc. I'm not thinking at the time and only till about a day later I realize that I had pretty much fed him pork. Fuck.", "summary": "Gave my muslim friend pork without him or I knowing. He enjoyed it like no other food he had before."}
{"id": "t3_2cguuc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "29 M with my now ex gf 25 F 1 year relationship...so confused", "post": "My gf and I started dating about a year ago. We met in a foreign city where we both were as ex-pats temporarily. After about 5 months I came back to the US, she returned after 8. We were strong long distance, but once we were both back it wasn't the same. We were hours apart but we would travel to each other on weekends.\n\nThe problem was we no longer had anything in common, we didn't have any mutual friends, and she started picking fights about innocuous things.\n\nIt came to a head a few days ago so we took a break for a few days. When we talked last night we both admitted it was over. We talked about how good things once were, how happy we were that we met each other, and how it was sad to see it end. There was no talk of a possibility of a future.\n\nThen she sent me a message telling me how much she missed me, how she wanted to see me etc etc. I called her and she started by telling me how sad she was to lose me, but now she knew how much I meant. She went on for about an hour saying she knew we were something special. When I offered to meet up with her, she said \"No, I don't want to get back together. I need to find myself. Let's call each other in a month.\"\n\nI told her I can't put my feelings on hold and maybe we shouldn't do that. She said nonchalantly \"Ok.\"...And that was it. Why would she call to build up the possibility of a relationship just to cut it down?\n\nIt's NC from here on out. I'm hurting.", "summary": "Broke up. She messaged me saying she really missed me wanted to meet up with me. Spent an hour telling me she wanted to be with me. I acquiesced, she threw it in my face :*("}
{"id": "t3_2m40e6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Update: Me [20 F] with my boyfriend [20 M] of Two years. We'd been dating long distance and He wanted a break", "post": "[Original Post](\n\nSo he just messaged me an hour ago over facebook telling me he misses me like crazy and that he had already bought plane tickets to come surprise me this weekend but wanted to tell me beforehand in case I'd made any plans. I have absolutely no idea how to feel about this. Of course I'm happy to see him and that he missed me but it feels surreal. Over the past few days I'd been seriously considering splitting from him because I wasn't sure I could take it just being on break, not knowing if he was pursuing other women or if he'd already met someone. I figured it would take him months to come back to me if he did at all, but only Two days? Is this a good sign or should we still take a break form each other, because I'm sure the problems he had before aren't just magically gone. Too many feelings over the past few days for me", "summary": "My long distance boyfriend initiated a break on Sunday but ended it today along with the news that he's coming visit this weekend and for some reason I'm still feeling weird"}
{"id": "t3_1fct3q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "We like each other [22M, 19F] but she can't seem to completely break up with her mistreating BF.", "post": "Known each other for a few months but only got to really know each other in the last month or so. We've hung out a couple times and the chemistry was just crazy. We know that we're attracted to each other and yet we can talk to each other like friends.\n\nHer BF treats her like shit. He's garbage. Eats her food, asks her to replace his lost phone (she said no), and manipulates her (trying to make her guilt trip). It's an on and off relationship (2-3 months) and living in the same dorm definitely doesn't help her and makes emotions magnified.\n\nWhat can I do? I don't want to directly influence any decisions.", "summary": "Like this girl, pretty sure she likes me too. But she can't break it off with her mistreating BF."}
{"id": "t3_1j4bzn", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/f] My boyfriend [23/m) is looking at pornographic images while I'm sitting in the room with him. Am I wrong in finding this disrespectful?", "post": "I want to make it clear that I have come to terms with the fact that my boyfriend masturbates to porn frequently. I have done everything I can to try to accommodate this into our relationship, but he's not interested. I get that we all need some \"me-time\" every so often and I will be the first to admit that I will masturbate when he leaves the house sometimes, so I am fully aware of the reasons why even people in happy sexual relationships masturbate a lot. I refuse to be a hypocrite about this so I have worked very hard to be understanding. \n\nBut today, I was just casually playing", "summary": "I don't mind my boyfriend watching porn but I caught him today looking at pornographic images while I'm in the room with him, and that upsets me. Is it reasonable for me to be upset? Do guys do this often?"}
{"id": "t3_41qb73", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31M] with my SO[29 F] 2 months, she suffers from bio polar and her family has a history of mental health problems", "post": "My written English isn't the best. Please ask for any clarification and I'll respond. I've been dating Julie for about two months and have known her for over a year. She's had boyfriend and I girlfriends but there was a connection. We both were recently single and were talking and one thing lead to another. Now fast forward two months till now. Everything is great but she is showing signs of bi polar disorder. She is intensely happy and excited to the point I start to worry. She sleeps all day and wakes up grogy at one in the afternoon. Three weeks ago she was sleeping very little and was getting pretty moody. All the sex and the dire for it changes from week to week.  I have to walk in egg shells in order for her not to snap at me. She doesn't use medicine. But self medicated with pot and sometimes alchol. My question is does anyone have any history with this disorder? How do I apporch her about her disorder? Also when she snaps how do I respond. Currently I just walk away and when we get into arguments I just walk away. I'm no peach either. I have a past and I have problems from it. But I'm a better person and I'm working on bettering my issues.", "summary": "new girlfriend suffers from bi polar disorder, self medicates and her reactions differ according to her mood. does anyone have any history with this disorder or significant other suffer from it etc? How do I apporch her about her reactions?"}
{"id": "t3_n0w5o", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Difficulties with a different college, long distance relationship", "post": "I am finishing up the last week of fall quarter of my second year as an undergrad.  I am in a long distance relationship, eight hours apart.  The college I attend was my first choice for college, though I never had any real reason to want to attend, I just wanted to.  My boyfriend's college is also his first choice.  I was accepted into both.  They are both fantastic colleges, his even being ranked higher than mine.  However, when after talking it over, we decided that me moving away for college, the college I originally wanted to attend would be the best option.  I was to go to his school, and we were to break up, I would feel silly choosing a college over a boy, he would feel guilty for allowing me to make that choice, and overall we would feel awful.  So we decided on doing the long distance thing.\n\nWe have been going out for over three and a half years, and the last year has been difficult.  But we have survived and are even better than before.  Our relationship seems solid.  We do have issues, and they are often exacerbated by the long distance, but we trudge on.  However, through it all, I feel so guilty for putting our relationship through this.  It seems as though this is a relationship that will last, and it would make life ten times easier if we had been in the same school.  He always blames me for the problems we have, because I chose to move away.  I dont really know how to deal with it.  How can I help him move past the decision, and on to fixing the problems that do arise instead of blaming me for my collegiate decision?\n\nSorry for the long post.  It just keeps getting difficult.", "summary": "Chose a far away college, how to help bf get over that \"selfish\" decision to better strengthen our relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_27ahqj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23M) think depression/sadness is getting in the way of my relationship with my gf (22f) of 4 months", "post": "I've not been in a relationship for about 3 years. The last one ended poorly put while I was in it, it was very passionate. Before and after this relationship I've been going to a therapist for some mild form of depression.\n\nFast forward to the beginning of 2014. It seems over the past two years or so depression has gotten worse and everything seems pointless. I decided I couldn't do the single lifestyle any more and found this girl who is very intelligent, kind, pretty, funny. I found out she had an eating disorder and depression and we've been able to talk about these things which has been helpful to both of us, I think. While this girl has been great, I'm not feeling the same spark with her as I was the ex. I know this girlfriend likes me a lot, but I think if she said \"I love you,\" I would freak out because I don't feel that way. I mean, I care for her and respect her and don't want to hurt her, but it's just not as much positive feeling or passion as I know I can be capable of. I bounce back and forth multiple times a week or day on if I should end things with her or not because of a lack of feelings on my part. The thing is that it would be through no fault of her own. What do you think?", "summary": "I don't feel as strongly for my gf as I think I should even though she is great. History of depression and not a lot of positive feelings."}
{"id": "t3_45shqd", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Best option for buying a new car?", "post": "I am just curious about one thing and that is the best way to go about financing my purchase, more specifically getting the loan. For anyone who is curious, the reason I want to buy new is because I plan to start a family in the near future and want something that falls into place with that and can get my fiance and I to work daily.\n\nIf my fiance and I both have limited credit histories (almost 2 years for me, 1 year for her) and scores in the very high 600s, low to mid 700s, would it make sense for her to cosign on a loan with me or should I ask a family member with a more extensive credit history? We have already looked over our finances extensively and decided upon what we can afford together since we are getting married this year, but I just want to know what makes sense in regards to applying for our auto loan. I am looking to get the best interest rate and more than likely looking into a 72 month loan (lower payments but I will pay it off before the term is up).\n\nThe dealer I am looking into has a financing program that gives a 500$ discount to recent grads (Honda), but should I look to get my loan from a bank I have a history with (Wells Fargo) or even joining a local Credit Union since they give the lowest rates? \n\nAlso, if it helps, I am going to be making about a 20% downpayment depending on how much I can afford later this year (already have a good portion saved in a separate account) and I am aiming for an OTD price of $30,000 - $32,000 when I begin negotiations.\n\nThanks in advance guys.", "summary": "Should someone who has a limited credit history cosign a loan for someone else who has a limited credit history to get a better rate?"}
{"id": "t3_3kwzmu", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Should I sell my rental property?", "post": "Hi /r/personalfinance,\n\nI own a condo that I bought in 2008, and initially lived in myself, but have been renting out ever since I moved away in 2010 for a better job. Between the rent, the property management fees, the mortgage payment, PMI, and HOA fees, I estimate that I am paying about $250-300 per month to own this property.\n\nThe tenants in the property for the past couple years are so pleased with it that they're working with a real estate agency (the same I used when buying it) to make me an offer on it. I still don't know the number that they will be offering, but my concern is how to really process that number. There seems to be so much at play:\n\n* Tax breaks I've gotten and continue to get for paying a mortgage\n* Property management fees I've paid over the past 5 years\n* Property tax I've paid over the past 7 years\n* All the mortgage interest that's been paid\n* Taxes that would be assessed as part of the sale\n* 3% agency fees that I'd have to pay for\n* The rent that I didn't have to pay when I was living in the unit, that I would have had to if I hadn't bought it\n\nCan anyone help me figure out how to really quantify the impact that selling it would have? I should also say that I'm in a financially strong position and that owning the property does not put me under any strain. I'd really like to be able to run the numbers and see what it looks like before making a decision one way or the other.\n\nIf it helps to provide specifics about the mortgage and the other costs then say so in the comments and I will.", "summary": "I don't know how to figure out whether I'm losing money by selling my rental property to the tenants who live in it now, how do I reconcile all the factors?"}
{"id": "t3_4a5015", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] with my friend/crush [16 F], friends for about 1.6 years, want to know if risking the friendship for a relationship is worth it", "post": "So I like this girl who I've had a sort of on and off friendship with for a year and a half now. Everytime it's on I develop feelings to some extent and now it's undeniable.\n\nWhen I talk to her we talk a lot about politics and philosophy and the sort, and when it's just the two of us, the conversation always gets sexual. Not directly, but like what we've done, what we like, etc. \n\nI learned that she doesn't do this with most of her friends, but at the same time, she is normally very physical (touchy-feely) with her friends and she's not with me.\n\nI've been told she's trying to get over her ex still, and can definitely tell she has depression and engages in worrying and problematic behaviors at times. I want to be in a better position to help her.\n\nI tried to start texting her a couple of weeks ago. The first conversation went pretty well but the next time I tried she didn't text back. I don't know if that is due to lack of interest or other reasons.\n\nAlso I want to know how to get her want more than just sexual things, because it's possible that, if she likes me at all, she only wants that based on our conversations. (Or she could just be comfortable with me, who knows?)\n\nWhat should I do?", "summary": "Like a girl, girl talks to me about philosophy and sex, is still getting over her ex, has depression and I want to help her. Is it worth it to try and date her?"}
{"id": "t3_1x1g7x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my girlfriend [19F] of 8 months, she is lying to me about alking to other guys", "post": "Hey! I have a bit of an issue with my current girlfriend. We have had some problems with her not wanting to tell me stuff because she doesn't want to \"create problems\". Small stuff like she sending pictures a lot with another guy on snapchat, and telling me that she isn't. When I found out, I told her that it didn't matter to me if she talked to other guys as long as she was being honest to me about doing it, and that she was faithful to me.\n\nProblem is that she is currently on a backpacking trip in South-East Asia, and she keeps telling me that she isn't talking to any other guys. Thing is I know her FB password, and I have seen her talking to other guys, only harmless stuff, like partying together etc. I keep telling her that as long as she is honest with me, I don't care if she is talking to guys. I am starting to get suspicious about why she doesn't want me to know that she is talking to theses guys.\n\nMy question is: Why does she keep lying to me, even though I have made it very clear that I am okay with her talking to other guys? Should I be suspicious, and is this some kind of \"red flag\"?", "summary": "Girlfriend is lying to me about talking to boys, even though I have made it clear that i'm ok with it. What does this mean?"}
{"id": "t3_2eic84", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [17F] best friend [18F] of 9 years died about 12 hours ago, what do I do?", "post": "We met in the fourth grade, we spent every day together for a year and a half before I had to move cross country (summer before grade 6). We kept in touch, speaking almost every day. The last time I saw her (and only time since the last day of school in grade 5) was May of 2013. She was healthy then. \n\nNine months ago, she was diagnosed with a heart/lung condition and was given 7 years to live originally. As her condition progressed, she quickly lost time off of that estimate. Three days ago I got a message from her informing me that she needed a double lung transplant and open heart surgery, without it she would only be able to live between 6 months and 2 years more. I found out 5 hours ago that she passed away. \n\nShe was a compassionate, loving, goofy, accepting,  selfless human being. She was beautiful inside and out. I loved her more than anyone in the world and she was like family to me when my own family wasn't.  I don't know what to do.", "summary": "My best friend passed away yesterday after being diagnosed with between 6 months and 2 years to live only 3 days ago. I am at a loss."}
{"id": "t3_35snp6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So I'm talking to this guy. There's an eighteen year difference. He's forty-two and I'm twenty-three..", "post": "We met through his band. I added him on facebook because of his band. As is with certain genres, he added me. I tagged him in a post asking for advice, and he called me that same night. We had a pretty in-depth conversation. \n\nThe craziest thing is we share so much. He has a depth I have never seen before in anyone else. Which is perfect because I have a depth. We can talk about the deepest shit, and it's totally normal. We share religion. We share music interests. He still dreams. The man still dreams. I have never met someone I have shared so much with. For someone of his age, he is still so young. He has a hunger for life that I just love. He is always going somewhere, and that is usually the beach. \n\nThe best thing is he has no kids. No offense, but it would be awkward if he did. Let's face it, I would only be ten years older or so than his kids. But he doesn't. \n\nThe bottom line is that despite this difference, we resonate. Our spirits are the same. We are the same person. I want so bad to be with him. I can imagine life with him. He knows I like him. And he hasn't run screaming. In fact, he is speaking to me a bit more since he found it. So I'm taking that as a good sign.", "summary": "I am a twenty-four year old woman speaking to a forty-two year old man. And I have fallen hard and fast, yet we've only been speaking for two months. The age difference is my only concern."}
{"id": "t3_p4j3j", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "New to dating, am I in the wrong?", "post": "So, Reddit. I'm 24 and Male. Since 16 I've gone from girlfriend and relationship directly into new girlfriend and relationship. Falling out of one and into another. Recently I broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years and I determined that I was going to take some time to myself and some time to date and \"play the field\". It's been 7 months since the complete termination of my previous coupling. Around two months ago I started talking to, spending time with and sleeping with a young lady who I find rather fetching. We both voiced a lack of desire of a \"facebook\" official relationship and our want of freedom, low expectations, etc. I do \"like her\", as juvenile as that (and all of this) sounds. And I could definitely see being in a monogamous relationship, and she has mentioned similar leanings recently. Lets call her Girl A.\nNow. Here is the complication. \nNot seeing myself as \"taken\"  in any capacity, I continued to wander around flirting and generally having fun and putting myself out there. \nOver the past 3 weeks I've been seeing another girl as well. Read seeing as actions mentioned before.\nBoth of them has different personalities and physical characteristics. \nNow here is my issue. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING.\nI don't want to stop seeing either of them and but I don't entirely feel right seeing the both at the same time. Both of them have been making leanings towards a relationship and I don't want a serious, concrete relationship right now. Despite that I could see myself with either of them.  I've never dated and I've never really been pursued I'm lost in the haze of person interest, minor feelings and fear of damaging others.", "summary": "Normally a one woman, old school, monogamist. Dating/Seeing 2 very different girls that are both relationship material. Both seem to be leaning towards that. LOST"}
{"id": "t3_17ow7e", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I've [23F] recently begun a romantic relationship with my SO [26m] - total dream come true - but unsure of his feelings.", "post": "I'm really confused, any advice at all would be appreciated.\n\nSo. We started out as good friends/best friends for the last year or so, and we've only just agreed to pursue each other romantically (it's only been about a month). \n\nHe's already become quite attached, and is (mostly) convinced that I'm the one for him. I can't say that I'm quite as attached, but things have definitely progressed a lot faster than I expected. Despite all that, I find it hard to believe he feels the way he does, considering that when I first expressed my interest (not too long ago), he responded in kind but was not entirely sure how he felt about me/didn't feel ready to pursue a relationship. He came around soon enough and made up his mind, but I can't stop thinking of his initial doubts.\n\nI'm just really confused because I was burnt badly in my last relationship - he lied a LOT, used me, but was also loving? - and I REALLY don't want the same thing happening to me again. Especially because my current interest is an amazing individual, and I can't understand how I got so lucky.\n\nI don't know if I'm carrying over TOO many remnants of my bad experience into this relationship, or if I am just being cautious by putting my feelings on hold until I can determine how true his are.  I feel like a horrible person for doubting him, even though he tries to prove himself and is very much a sweetheart.", "summary": "Beginning a new relationship, things are moving fast, unsure of his devotion/feelings. Am I a jerk for wanting proof?"}
{"id": "t3_13exde", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "One of my best friends [17F] may love me [17M].", "post": "Not sure how to start, so I'll just tell it as it occurs to me. This girl is truly one of my best friends, and I love her in that respect immensely. We are very open with each other and are aware that physically, we find one another attractive.\n\n On friday night, as we were both fairly drunk (don't chastise for the age, in our country legal drinking from 16) she turned to me and seemed like she was trying to say something else, but in the end just said \"whatever, I dont care, I dont care, can we just hook up\" and so we did. This night, however, was a bit of an odd one, as we were with a few other friends, and several were making out already. So I went for it, and hooked up with another friend afterwards as well. A probably relevant detail is that at a party a few weeks ago we also made out, but accepted it as being nothing.\n\nThat was fine, and it seemed that there was no problem, however I later saw the girl looking at me oddly and we hooked up again, with her initiating. also when we all crashed at another friends house, she came to sleep next to me. The major complications arise in the fact that a few months ago I broke up with a long term gf who is one of this girl's closest friends.\n\nFurthermore, recently (for about 2 months) I have had a bit of a thing with another girl, but nothing serious. On friday she also mentioned that and it seemed she was sad about it, though I assumed it was just because she was sad about something else (unrelated, I wont go into it). I then asked another friend who was there that night, who is very close with both of us if the girl loved me, and she said \"of course, its obvious\" but she may have been meaning friend-love. So I am not looking for anything with this girl, and she knows that nothing can happen, but what do I do? acknowledge that she has romantic feelings and I dont? Or am I just misinterpreting everything (entirely possible)?", "summary": "Best friend may possibly love me, dont want to mess up our friendship, what do I do? Also I may just be misinterpreting."}
{"id": "t3_m892x", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's your worst \"First world problem\" story?", "post": "I'll start. \n\nTonight I went out with one of my roommates to eat at a new restaurant. Turns out it was awesome: TONS of beer on tap, awesome food (I devoured the Sausage and Shrimp platter), and there was a TV at every table. Needless to say, I've found my new place to go to watch away football games. \n\nMy friend and I get in the car to drive home and we're both talking about how stuffed we are. We both have eaten so much, too much, that we almost feel sick. We laugh about it and and head home. Then my phone rings. It's my mom. I go to college in the same town that I graduated high school and it turns out that I was supposed to eat supper tonight with the family and spend some time with them. \n\nI tell her that, yes I'd forgotten due to being busy with schoolwork but that I'm on my way now. I proceed to speedily drop my roommate off, wash my hands and brush my teeth of Cajun spices and then head over to my parent's house to eat with them so that they don't feel worse than they already do for having their son forget about dinner with them. \n\nI think I'm about to throw up having just eaten two full meals...", "summary": "I am about to throw up because I was forced to eat two full and wonderful meals so as not to upset my family."}
{"id": "t3_x89cl", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Does anyone know how to find a personal e-mail for a producer?", "post": "I am at the end of the road. There is not a day that goes by that I do not think about ending my life and how I would do it. I was scheduled to be enrolled in a mental/behavioral outpatient program starting Monday. Then I got fired from my job. I'm getting dropped from my insurance. I had to cancel my registration. My dogs are the only thing keeping me here. I could find them a home. A beautiful life on a farm chasing rabbits and digging holes. Laying in the sun and rolling in deer poop. That makes me think about my life long dream. I want to open a shelter. A shelter for people and animals where they can go to live out their final days, or until they find something better, or until they can get on their feet enough to make it on their own. I want to call it The Farm. From lost without a cause to the terminally ill, I want to provide a place where people and animals can find themselves in the harmony and beauty of a relationship with each other. \nI lost my job Friday and found out today that I no longer have insurance. Against my better judgement and the wishes of the doctors I did see, I decided to get drunk. In a moment of what might have been delusion, I had an idea that if I could somehow find a way to contact a producer or someone like Marjorie Kaplan (the GM of Animal Planet) that they might find this idea as beautiful as I do. I think many people would want to see the story of animals or people coming together when their world is against them to live in a place that they can finally call home. I thought maybe if they agreed with me, they would fund the start up of my Farm, air a few seasons then I could continue the work of giving people and animals something to hope for. Maybe I'm delusional. You tell me. I can't afford healthcare. I looked for several hours and could not find a way to contact such a producer personally. Could you help me?", "summary": "I have an idea for a tv show that could not only be a great reality series but help me achieve my dreams. I just need a way to get there."}
{"id": "t3_3iwxeo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [39M] and my co-worker [F] - will she think that I am making changes for her?", "post": "I recently developed a crush on a married co-worker.  She definitely knows that I like her, because suddenly I was complimenting her haircut, talking to her a lot more frequently (previously I never talked to her much), and on a few occasions I couldn't help but give her some lingering looks.  But I totally respect her marriage and I'm not going to be making any moves on her.\n   \nAnyway, not long ago I posted my photo to amiugly (to see if it might explain why I can't get dates), and several people told me to get better looking eyeglasses, a different hairstyle, and better looking clothes.  I'm not opposed to doing that, however, what might my co-worker think if I did all that stuff?  Would she think I'm doing it all for her?  I don't want her to get the wrong impression.", "summary": "Married co-worker knows I like her.  If I come in with new glasses/haircut/clothes, will she think I'm doing it all for her?"}
{"id": "t3_2ekgyn", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by kneeing my girlfriend in the face.", "post": "So this actually happened a couple years back. Me and my girlfriend had recently just moved in together and had sat down to watch a movie one night. A little ways into the movie she decided it would fun to start tickling me, I'm extremely ticklish so it didn't take long for things to go horribly wrong. I was laying on my stomach and she went for a spot on the back of my leg and in my panic I swung around and managed to knee her in the face.\n\nMostly stunned at first and in some pain she shook it off and we continued to watch the movie, until she noticed a clear like fluid dripping out of her nose. So we went to the emergency room to have her examined and what the fluid turned out to be was cerebrospinal fluid. So the fluid surrounding her brain was leaking causing it to sink on her brain stem and she began to have low pressure headaches.\n\nThey put a drain into her spine to help relieve pressure off of the leak in her skull, but during the procedure the tech had missed his entry point and had mistakenly herniated one of her discs. As a result of this two of her vertebrae collapsed and are now putting pressure on a nerve. It has been over four years since that has happened, she has had a surgery to fix her collapsed septum, and will have several more procedures placing localized pain killers on her nerve endings to help her sciatica she now has as a result of the pressure from her vertebrae. Once they have the sciatica under control they will prepare her spine for surgery and begin the repair process on her vertebrae and herniated disc.", "summary": "girlfriend tickled me I kneed her in the face collapsing her septum and causing a cerebrospinal fluid leak out of her nose, still dealing with problems four years later."}
{"id": "t3_26prcr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] can't seem to get over an event in my gf's [22 F] past.", "post": "My roommates, gf included, were talking about our past and she wasn't saying much (she didn't cause as much trouble as her bff, bff's fiance, and I had). But, one sex-story she did tell hit me hard.\n\nShe hooked up with a guy twice, once in a hotel, once at his place. At his place, he had been drinking a bit and wanted to try anal. She didn't want to but he played the \"you don't know until you try it\"-card. After he started, she said she felt sick and he said, \"I've already started, I can't stop.\" And he finished a minute or so later.\n\nIt didn't bother me that she hooked up with a guy, I thought it was cool/out of the ordinary for her. The part that hit hard was that he forced her into something she felt she couldn't avoid.\n\nShe isn't traumatized over it, she just said that she was sore for a couple days, but I can't get over that it happened.\n\nOther stuff: We've dated for 9 months now, the event occurred last May. She knows it hit me hard and we've talked about it.\n\nAny advice?", "summary": "Gf of 9 months was forced to have anal by drunk hookup before we met; can't stop thinking about it and it hurts to think about it."}
{"id": "t3_3fyade", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [30 F] co-worker [30 M] switched to part time and it's starting to affect my workload.", "post": "I work a pretty great job that has a very flexible set up. While I'm assigned to work on various projects by my manager, part of my time is allowed for the development of my own self-initiated projects so long as they can be used to help the company in the future. My co-worker who has the same set up and whose assigned work is often for the same projects as the ones I work on recently switched to working part-time so that he can have more time to develop his own self-initiated projects. This is great, and I'm happy for him except I've noticed a slow creep in my workload increasing as a result. It's nothing drastic so far, but I'm slowly becoming the person others default to in terms of making requests, asking me to attending meetings, etc. because the my co-worker is now not available part of the week and protects his time off by not answering email, etc. on days when he's out. As a result, my time spent on self-initiated projects is starting to decrease. \n\nHow do I talk to my manager about my concerns over the slow creep of my co-worker's former work into my workload? Even though my co-worker informed me he was switching to part-time, our manager never discussed this fact with me at all or what it means for me. I'm also not really sure what he can say given that there is no one else with similar expertise that can take the burden and our company only hires in April. We work in high enough demand positions where I can easily leave and get a new job if someone were to tell me to just suck it up and take it, but I'd really not resort to that. I just want to have a non-threatening conversation with my manager that at the same time allows me to stand up for myself and protect my time on self-initiated projects but I don't know what to say.", "summary": "Co-worker switched to part time and though I don't blame him, it's start to affect my workload. How do I talk to manager?"}
{"id": "t3_4imys5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (27 M) with my (25 F), co-worker is harassing her and she tolerates it", "post": "My GF works with this real creep. He will call her beautiful and hit on her at work. He randomly messages her mildly inappropriate texts at inappropriate hours. She has told me that he makes her uncomfortable.\n\nim not worried that there is anything going on between the two of them and i trust her. She does not respond to the messages or the advances, but she will not confront him about it or report it to the proper superior. She is afraid of confrontation. She rationalizes her actions by claiming that she does not want to make things \"awkward at work\" and that he is a harmless \"weird guy\". \n\nPersonally, I dont like her being harassed at work and i would like to step in, but i do not want to go against her wishes of course. I am not too sure what to do in this scenario. I am not mad at her because she is the victim in this situation, I just wish i could convince her that reporting him is the right thing to do. \n\nWhat would be the best route for me to take with this situation. Directly get involved and confront him myself or just offer emotional support for my GF and hope she eventually finds the courage to do something about this inappropriate behavior?", "summary": "GF is being hit on/ harassed at work and also over text messages/social media by a co-worker. She is afraid to confront him for fear of making things awkward at work. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3z5y51", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (20M) having issues with my girlfriend (20F). Is the relationship getting stale or am I just getting depressed?", "post": "This may seem like an immature problem, but I am looking for people's different perspectives on this topic. I've been dating this girl for 2 years now (senior year of high school to sophomore in college, same school,  wasn't planned). Everything was going fine and I felt that the honeymoon phase would last forever, but as it always ends up, it slowed down.\n\n I guess that's good because we learned to work on our relationship and we both understood that it's not easy to maintain a relationship. Well, recently the entire texting each other all day to me has become a drag and when I think about that my mind goes places such as \"are you losing interest in her?\" \"are you getting bored?\". So, when she got back from vacation a couple days ago I told her about all of this. She agreed and we also went the route of saying we're both 20 and it's hard because we're in college and we both have different urges. We both agreed that we both wonder if there's anything else out there that is better than one of us because this is the first serious relationship either one of us has had. She said she wished we could take a break for 2 weeks and see how it feels (not like going to go fuck anything that moves break but a see how it feels to be single)  and then go back to normal right after. \n\nThis is impractical. We both value the relationship very much but for me it seems to have gone stale, mainly because we usually do the same thing when we're at school because lack of transportation/laziness. I'm not sure if it's other forces in my life such as not being in good shape, low self confidence in my body, or just the stresses of growing into an adult. I also feel that life is getting stale. Starting to think about a career and everything is stressful, so just becoming numb has become my defense mechanism. This might just be a spillover effect. So I beg for different perspectives and advice. If you need any clarifying answers, I can provide if you ask. This is the first time I've ever said this to anyone and I appreciate anyone who has gotten this far!", "summary": "Problems with relationship. It's getting stale but at the same time I think I'm going through a valley in my life."}
{"id": "t3_30zo9l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34 F] with my _boyfriend__ [30M/] 1 year, I have just found out he has been cheating for 6 MONTHS!!!!", "post": "6months...6 months!!!!! I've never felt so betrayed. I'm everything you would expect heartbroken, angry. I haven't stopped crying since I've found out I'm pretty sure he's in love with her, and he never was with me.  \nI  don't know how to pick myself up, and I desperately need advice on how to cope. I'm afraid I'm not going to recover from this. My previous breakup nearly killed me off, and this well... It makes the other one seem like a cake walk.\n\nBefore you ask I didn't do anything wrong, he just met someone, started a relationship with her (we are not living together) and decided not to mention it, whilst treating me horribly, making me think all that time that him being awful to me was my fault.\n\nI feel so incredibly alone.  I don't have anyone to talk to.\n\nI know this is probably too generic a question, but is there any advice out there from someone who has been through something similar. or someone who hasn't frankly, I'm open to any suggestion that doesn't involve me walking off a cliff. Help.", "summary": "Boyfriend cheated on me for past 6 months/Please help me come up with a way to not shoot my self from the sense of loneliness and betrayal."}
{"id": "t3_2000sv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29F] with my bf [31M] together for 6 years. been broke up for 5 weeks and I just called him. Please help me.", "post": "My ex broke up with me 5 weeks ago telling me he didn't love me anymore. He was a horrible person at all in the relationship and there was no other reason for the breakup. \n\nDuring the break up he did say some horrible things. I was doing the NC but have had a really bad weekend and I ended up speaking to him a second ago. I didn't know what I was going to achieve by this but I asked if he missed me. He Hesitated and then said sometimes. Basically this is really no. \n\nI feel so awful for what I've done to my self. I've no deleted his number and crossed it out where I written it. Why did I do it? What did I think this would achieve?\nI'm being so weak, I'm trying to carry on but why doesn't my mind stop thinking about him? Why when after 6 years he doesn't care why do I care so much? I shouldn't be wasting my time on him when he doesn't want to be in my life, so why am I?\n\nI'm so scared it won't get better and I won't be strong enough to get through this. I feel stupid because I know I shouldnt let this rule my life and I can be me without him. \nPlease can anyone offer a little help I feel like I'm going out of my mind. even doing different things I'm still thinking about him I feel this to much to handle every day.", "summary": "5 weeks since break up and really struggling to pull through. Know what I should do but can't make my mind strong enough to do it. Any help would be appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_pcq8x", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "So how does your body decide where on your body fat will be burned?", "post": "I've wondered this for a long time and am hoping someone with a health background can weigh in... it seems that the areas of your body which at cells get fat are fairly consistent but random, by this I mean you don't get fat from the top down or in some other strange way, it all sort of gets fat at the same rate; I assume this has alot to do with your genetics. So this has me wondering how fat is burned. I assumed for along time that if you walked, you burn fat in your lower body, do sit ups burn fat in your belly etc. But that was always a passing assumption, when I actually thought about it I have no idea.", "summary": "You get fat steadily all over your body simultaneously, how does the body decide which area of the body to burn fat from first?"}
{"id": "t3_1xi9jp", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Breach of contract / legal advice please", "post": "Anchorage, Alaska\n\nSo I will keep this short, as I dont know how active this subreddit is, but also put as much detail as possible in hopes I can get some legal advice here.\n\nI work for a multi million dollar company, one which pays me a percentage of its net earnings after my particular expenses such as rent, overhead, etc.  While most of this was clear cut in the past, and I could track it, double check it, we moved to a new computer system last year and for the past several months money has gone missing, my paychecks have been getting smaller and smaller, while profit has been at all time highs.  My accounting department has consistently called me about mis-allocated funds wondering where they are supposed to go, especially at year end. Every month prior to our new computer system I was consistently owed money due to statements needing to be finalized, and it was corrected on the following check.  Now I am never owed a penny, statements are wrong, accounting calls me constantly, my company is in litigation with this software company and I don't think I will ever recover a dime of the 7 going on 8 months I have been underpaid. I have told my superior who agrees with me, but says questioning it further could cost me my job.", "summary": "I signed a clear cut contract for pay with a multi million dollar company; exceeded quotas and was underpaid, 24 pay stubs to prove it, can anyone help?"}
{"id": "t3_1fm29z", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/m] I want to break up with my [19/f] girlfriend for summer", "post": "We've been dating for 8 months now and I think we spent too much time together too soon (we hung out every single night for the last 8 months) and it fizzled out for me and i'm just not enjoying it anymore. I tried to tell her this but I couldn't go through with it, so instead I told her that I think we should break up for summer because we are both considering going to community college instead of a university for a year to save some money, and I didn't want to be the reason she came back, because I wan't her to make decisions about her future for herself.\n\nThat reason is mostly true but frankly it's more because it's gotten old for me. She's still crazy about me and at first she said she was okay with breaking up for summer, but a couple days later she told me that she understands that I don't want to influence her future but that's not what she wants.\n\nAlso, I want to wait until she's done with finals because I don't want to mess anything up for her, but we only have a couple of hours between her last final and when I have to go home, and she will be with her mom the whole time.  \nI would talk to her about it now if I thought she could handle it without it effecting her grades, but she loves me too much and she cries too easily, it just breaks my heart to think about doing that to her.\n\nI really dont know what to do.", "summary": "I want to break up with my girlfriend, I told her it was so I wouldn't influence her future but really we just spent too much time together too soon and too often."}
{"id": "t3_2klzfh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] broke my leg pretty badly and can't do anything for awhile. My [36M] bf has been helping me but is getting stressed", "post": "So I'm 23 and my boyfriend is 36 (yes, I know, huge age difference, but we've been together for almost a year and it's been going well).  I recently broke my leg pretty badly and will be on crutches for the next 2 months and am not allowed to put any weight on it.  My boyfriend  lives in his own place but has been sleeping over every night to help me before bed and in the morning before he leaves for work.  \n\nHe comes home on his lunch break to check on me and help me with lunch, then goes back to work.  He works from home and does his own projects at night before coming over when he's done.  I appreciate his help because I'm absolutely helpless in these crutches but I'm worried he's beginning to resent me for needing his help. \n\nI've been trying to give him time away from me, trying to get friends to come over and help here and there to give him time to himself but that's only a few times a week. We can't have sex because of my leg/cast, I can only shower occasionally, I cant wear anything but sweat pants.. I'm not looking my best lately and I just want to remind him why he loves me.  I was just hoping you guys would have ideas/suggestions? Have any of you been in a similar situation?", "summary": "Broke my leg, cant have sex, need boyfriend to help me with everything, worried he resents me for needing him so much, looking for ideas to remind him why he loves me/bring back the romance."}
{"id": "t3_1fq6i3", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Comcast has never sent me a bill for Internet service in over 4 months [Pennsylvania]", "post": "Back in February my girlfriend and I signed up for a Comcast internet only package at her apartment.  The apt was already wired for service, they mailed their \"Self-Install Kit\", I hooked everything up, called them, and boom internet.  I was expecting a bill after March, since February would be pro-rated and added to March.  Well here it is June and we have yet to see a bill.\n\nI've logged into the online customer account and upon viewing the billing page it still says something like \"You will receive your first bill shortly.\"  No automatic payments are setup, it clearly states paper bill, and the address is correct.  We've even received promotional offers to the address!\n\nWhat obligations am I under here?  Is my account \"late\" if they have never billed me?  For now I'm just riding it out as long as possible and keeping screenshots of the billing page in case they try to say they sent bills.", "summary": "Signed up for Comcast internet, haven't received a bill in 4 months, all information displayed on online account is correct."}
{"id": "t3_fovqy", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "You're a badass Sysadmin. How do I get you interested in the position, how do I make sure you can hack it? [Xpost from /r/jobs]", "post": "I've got two problems at the moment, both inter-related.\n\n* First, The Job Posting:\n\nThanks to corporate-speak, it's extremely hard to come across as genuine in a business context.  I'm looking for people who enjoy IT, and take a lot of pride in what they do.  I'm looking for the sort of people to whom \"good enough\" isn't.  How do I let these sort of people that they want to work with me?  How do I let them know that my company knows \"pride\" isn't just a buzzword for \"watching the bottom line\"?\n\n* Second, The Candidates:\n\nI'm pretty new to management.  There are a lot of people who are far more experienced at talking themselves up than I am at figuring them out.  It's easy enough to hire someone qualified, you can test for that with a well-executed test environment.  The problem is that will only tell you what they're capable of, not how much you have to fight them to do anything.  \n\nWe're an IT company in the small/medium business market, our clients don't generally have piles of cash to blow on new servers.  There are times I'll have to hand someone a 3-year old server and some extra RAM and say \"The client's budget fell through this year but they still need an upgrade, see how well you can polish this turd.\"  The kind of person I'm looking for isn't just gonna say \"This thing sucks\".  They're gonna say \"This thing sucks, but it's gonna gleam anyway because it's *my* fuckin' turd.\"", "summary": "I'm looking for people who take pride in their work.  How do I get them interested, and how do I separate them from the half-assers?"}
{"id": "t3_3531i7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[26/F] went on one date with a Tinder guy [29/M], not feeling a spark. How do I tell him kindly?", "post": "I really don't know how this is going to go over because it's the old friendzone story and I feel pretty guilty about it. I met a smart, stable, funny guy on Tinder. But I have no interest in kissing him or doing anything intimate with him, even though he's good looking! Of course I couldn't tell I'd feel that way until we met in person. \n\nObviously Tinder guy does want a relationship. And I'm very bad at telling people things they don't want to hear. I haven't dated much and I don't really know how to handle this. How can I approach him without hurting his feelings? How likely is it that he'd want to be friends with me after meeting me in a romantic context? I want to keep him in my life solely because there are so few people I legitimately enjoy spending time with. We chat often by text and on FB but this really seems like the sort of thing I should talk to him about in person. Or maybe not, since we've only been on one date?", "summary": "Girl meets boy, boy seems really into girl, but girl doesn't return the sentiment and is too awkward to know what to do. Is friendship with him possible or am I too much of a walking clich\u00e9? Dammit. Help."}
{"id": "t3_37zf62", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my girlfriend [27 F] of 14 months. She wants to wait until marriage again...", "post": "We started out taking it slow and getting to know each other.  One night we started making out and she informed that she was waiting until marriage to have sex.  I said it was cool, I enjoyed her company and thought she was a wonderful person.  Anyway we progressed from making out to other sexual acts and we started having sex about 9 months into the relationship.  It was great, we were having a healthy sexual relationship.  Then she dropped a bomb on me three weeks ago... She wanted to wait until marriage to have any type of sexual relationship...\n\nShe said that was her intentions from the start and she gave into her desires.  She made it clear that I did not pressure her and that she did it willingly but is now feeling guilty.  She said it was how she envisioned dating.  She had a long term boyfriend  of 5 years before me and they were also sexually active but did not have penetrative sex.\n\nWe had lengthy discussions about it for a week.  I said that I would respect her wishes and try it out but I want to keep this discussion open for the future.  Three weeks in, I hate it.  I don't feel comfortable around her.  She gives me alot of affection and I love her dearly and want to make this work, but I cannot stand not being able to have a sexual relation.  \n\nWe began seriously discussing marriage and that is something that we both want.  I was going to propose in August when we were planning a vacation but now I don't how I feel.  I don't think I can go without intimacy until 2017 or so...  Not sure what do.", "summary": "GF said she wanted to wait until marriage.  We began a sexual relationship.  Now she wants to go back until waiting."}
{"id": "t3_4q7per", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(16M) made fun of my teacher(33M)because he couldn't win me in a race and it turns out he had lung cancer", "post": "Hello, a few weeks ago I saw my teacher(I consider him an older brother rather than a teacher, and let's call him \"J\") in the swimming pool I usually go to so I greeted J and he asked if I wanted to race so I accepted. I won because him ran out of breath and couldn't continue so I asked if he was alright then continued my routine swimming. A few days later at school I saw him and reminded him of his loss and said: \"dead lungs, haha\"(Yes, that sounded horrible and I don't know why I said that AT ALL). Then around a week later I heard a few teachers talking and saying that J has lung cancer! I confirmed that by asking certain people. Now I feel guilt every single day because J PROBABLY thinks I knew about his condition and I knowingly mocked him for it. He hasn't changed the way he treats me, but I feel genuinely bad. What should I do?", "summary": "Won race with teacher, made fun of him for running out of breath(Made a direct comment about lungs), turns out he has lung cancer, I feel horrible because he probably thinks I made fun of his condition KNOWINGLY."}
{"id": "t3_298h9g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I, 25F, feel like i'm putting all the effort into the relationship than my boyfriend 25M. Please Help", "post": "My boyfriend and I have only been dating for 2 months and already I feel that i am making more effort than him. These couple days i have noticed that he dosen't hold or kiss or come near me like he used to.\n\nHe dosen't hold my hand as much. I feel like i am his friend rather than his girlfriend. I have told him how i feel and he responded to me that people dont have to kiss and hug all the time and that just once is normal. which i honestly dont agree with that. \n\nHe also said that hes got into a routine with having a girlfriend and dosebt have to do the things he did at the begging. \n\nWhen i told him that he made me feel special at the beginning and now hes distant and i feel like hes pushing me away, he replied with 'well thats just me, i cant manage yout emotions for you, you yourself can control/adapt them'. \n\nThat really hurt me these words that hes not even willing to do the little things he did like sweet text messages or calls etc I dont want gifts etc just for him to show me affection.\n\nNot too much to ask is it? Its just making me think now if this is a guy i wanna be with", "summary": "i would want him to show that he likes/cares for me. He tells me that  i need to control/adapt my feelings? I find that very rude"}
{"id": "t3_2128iv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20F] SO [20M] of seven months (whom I live with), has been emotionally cheating on me for what seems like the duration of our relationship.", "post": "A bit of a backstory: was in a shitty relationship for 4 years. Basically verbally/physically abused. Have horrible trust issues. Finally am able to leave this hell hole and meet someone who appears to appreciate me very much, until...\n\nI find myself, and my personality, to be attractive. I have (and still do) had many guys want to date, be in a relationship w/ me, etc.. Which is great and all. However, I finally found someone who I thought I could TRUST and confide in, until about 5 hours ago, when I felt the need to check his Facebook messages (mind you, for the first time in our relationship), to find a shit show of flirtatious remarks to other girls including: \"I like your big fake tits\" and \"send me some pics in lingerie\", and of course, \"I want to bang you again\". I feel like absolute shit, and I've never been so hurt. Basically reamed my SO out and gave him the option to leave me, and he didn't want to. I don't know whether to end it or keep it going longer to see if I can trust him again?", "summary": "Finally thought I found someone I could trust, turns out he has been emotionally cheating on me the WHOLE time, don't know whether to end it or not. Am I stupid?"}
{"id": "t3_2buafp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need (mostly from) men's perspective: should I [18F] tell him [20's M] that I like him?", "post": "I'm going to hang out (not a date) with a friend of mine tomorrow, and I've really been wanting to tell him how I feel towards him because it's been torturing me for the past 2 weeks! I somehow need to get this out of my chest.\n\nI don't know if I'm really bad at picking up signals or if he's just being really nice and friendly to everyone else, so I really have no idea if he's feeling the same way towards me, or if he's interested in me at all.\n\nThe reason why I ask for comments/advice from men is that I often hear that men like to do the pursuing, and that if he's not making the first move, then he's probably not into a girl. I know this sounds old-fashioned, but I think it's often true in some sense. I'm not shy when it comes to confessing my feelings for someone, but I don't know if this is a turn-off for guys or whatnot.\n\nSo, guys, what are your opinions on girls telling you first that they like you?", "summary": "I'm going to be meeting up with my friend and I want him to know that I like him, but I don't know if I should tell him or not. Should I?"}
{"id": "t3_3aqmx2", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "s you progress through life, how do you get over the existential pulse of aging and growing up?", "post": "I'm turning 28, recently moved to a new city, and as I've had to start my social circle over (from moving and starting a new job) and I've been getting these overwhelming feelings of \"oh shit, I'm going to die some day.\"\n\nI realize I started to take on a lot of worry, like what if this new job doesn't work out, or what if I can't afford my apartment? I'm now older than my father was when he married my mother and had me, and that thought FREAKS me out! I look at my girlfriend everyday (she moved with me) and see us growing old together, but at the same time I see us being young together. Then I see my grandparents, and their lives and having kids HOLY CRAP its just all so crazy.\n\nI guess, I don't know what to do with this certain awareness of reality now. Time, age, life. This shit is going by fast! It's scary! How do you all deal with these deep existential realizations? Any tips to just live in the moment and enjoy? (I'm trying!)\nThank you!", "summary": "I'm almost 30, recently moved with my girlfriend to a new city, and have been realizing I'm now more of an adult and it's sort of freaking me out!"}
{"id": "t3_52qbei", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[FL] Providing \"Gift\" Money for a Down Payment", "post": "I'm hoping to get some advice on this real estate related question.  My sister and her husband are working on purchasing their first home.  They approached me and asked if I would be willing to help them out with their down payment.  This assistance would be them handing me $5k in cash, and then I write them a check for the $5k and state it was a gift.  They said the broker told them to do this.\n\nPersonally, I don't see why something like this would be necessary, and for lack of a better term, seems to be money laundering.  I don't see how them having $5k in cash is any different from them getting \"gifted\" $5k.  Money is money, right?  \n\nFrom my little bit of google searching it looks like this then requires me to hand over my personal bank records as well to prove where the money came from.  While I don't have anything to hide, it is just more of an invasion of privacy in something I'm otherwise not a part of.\n\nIs this something that is common?", "summary": "Sister wants to hand me $5k cash and have me write them a check saying the $5k is a gift for their new home purchase."}
{"id": "t3_54j0yk", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Should I see my urologist? Or wait it out?", "post": "Hi Reddit! I have a bit of medical history to address super fast, but I'll split it up. Thank you in advance. ( F , 18 y/o )\n\nOctober 2015 I got my first UTI. They started to come back every 4-6 weeks. I was referred to see a nephrologist. He diagnosed me with kidney disease after having an ultrasound and revealing I have seemingly one kidney. Left has grown to compensate for the right that seems to have not worked since birth. Also had what they said to be a \"small stone\" in the right kidney.\n\nI had then been referred to see a urologist if I got another UTI within the span of the next nephrologist visit. Well, I got one again. So I had a scheduled visit there before the nephrologist.\n\nThat was around June, 2016. Not much longer than a month, I had gotten sick from what seemed to be a stomach virus. All the symptoms. Lasted longer than 48 hours, which was strange. I had two ER visits due to pain and what I thought was bloody stool. CT scan revealed a cyst on my right ovary but that wasn't made a big deal.\n\nThen a GI doctor referral. She scheduled a multitude of tests for me. My stool sample test came back positive with C. Difficile toxin B. I am now taking Flagyl for this. 500 mg 3x a day. I have an endoscopy and colonoscopy October 3rd.\n\nToday, I've had a bit of pain in my lower abdomen very similar to what I would say UTI pain. I've had burning sensations when I've gone to the bathroom, too. I'm a bit worried and was wondering if I should see my urologist. The next time I believed I would have a UTI he requested I go to the clinic. \n\nThank you, all advice is greatly appreciated!", "summary": "Diagnosed with kidney disease, recurrent UTI's, stone in kidney, cyst on right ovary, C. Difficile infection, and UTI symptoms while on Flagyl for C. diff."}
{"id": "t3_42f44w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] dating a [25F] and wondering how we should approach a relationship that has no real-life ties", "post": "I've been on a couple dates with a 25F, I'm a 24M. We met on tinder and I really like her. We've only been on two dates and made-out both times. It's nothing serious but when I think about how this might play out, I am a bit confused. I guess I'm just now starting to think about the dynamics of real relationship with her. \n\nA couple factors:\nWe live in different cities about a half hour away, and we both have cars. She works in my city. But my worry is that we have no real connections (ie work or shared hobbies). As a result, I feel that our scheduling of dates is rather forced and there isn't any casual way just to hangout (essentially we are either on a date, or not hanging out at all). Is this normal at my age? This dynamic is new to me because I've never really dated outside of college (where at least we had our studies in common). In the past, it's always just been natural to hangout with things like studying and then schedule actual dates intermittently, but now it seems that \"dating\" is the only way to hangout with this girl. In essence its \"dating to date\" rather than knowing each other as friends and then dating. It just feels forced to me. That said, I'd love to be in a committed relationship and I am up to give this a real commitment. \n\nSo I guess my questions are: how does dating change after college change? in general, are you/the general populace in their mid 20's more inclined to make strong efforts to make a relationship work? How do relationships at this age progress into casual, just sitting in front of a TV sort of thing? \n\nMy inclination as of now is just go with the flow and see how things play out. But a part of me gets anxious knowing that I like her but not seeing a way of making it work", "summary": "Two people in their mid 20's looking to have a serious relationship without having a reason to hangout, other than actually \"dating\". In your experience, how does casual dating change to a relationship for people in their mid 20s?"}
{"id": "t3_18lfo9", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I[m22] like girl A[f19], got caught up in a moment and kissed her sister, girl B[f21]...", "post": "So I met these two girls the same night and we started to hang out in groups. Throughout these hang-outs, I learned that girl B had some sort of 'rights' on me. For example, girl A would take the front-seat forcing girl B to sit in the backseat with me. Girl A was pretty much wing-manning for her sister. One night I was walking with girl B talking about deeper stuff, got caught up in moment, expressed feelings for one another and we kissed.\n\nProblem? I actually like her sister, girl A. Working quickly to rectify this is best I could, I talked to girl B about how things were rushed, I was vulnerable, and it was generally a mistake that we kissed. She took this more in a way of 'lets go back to being friends, and wait'. When in reality, I have no plans of dating her what-so-ever. Now I have successfully seemingly forever barred off the actual love interest,girl A, her sister, as I, being retarded, kissed girl B.\n\nGirl A and Girl B's sister relationship is important to me, I really don't see how I can safely pursue girl A at all, without dramatic things happening.\n\nOnly way I see this happening is if we stay friends long enough for girl B to move on, with the passing of time maybe pursuing girl A would become socially acceptable. Sigh... What if she finds someone else in that time?\n\nNeat info: Girl B told me how her sister, Girl A, talked about me a lot when we first met, and people thought she was interested in me.\n\nWHAT DO?", "summary": "Girl A and girl b are sisters. I am interested in Girl A. I kissed girl B like a moron. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_3d7wc1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The guy [33/M] I [27/F] have been seeing isn't as in touch as he was at the beginning. Is this a natural progression or is he just not as interested anymore?", "post": "I have been seeing a guy I met online since the beginning of April. We live an hour apart, and I will be moving abroad in about a year, but decided we'd like to date anyway. We both have varying, often long, work schedules and are able to see each other about every other weekend. \n\nAt the beginning he was texting me all the time. I mean all day. We have so much in common and it was really exciting getting to know one another. Now, sometimes we'll go for a few days without talking at all. I feel like I initiate things more often than not now. But he never ignores me, still always makes plans with me and is always really excited to see me when we do get together. We have a great time together, he always tells me how much he loves spending time with me.\n\nHonestly, now as I am typing this out it feels a bit stupid and insecure. I haven't wanted to bring it up as we aren't serious and I don't WANT to sound needy or insecure. Is this just a normal progression of things or am I right to wonder if he's just not interested anymore? It's been a while since I've been in a relationship or dated anyone longer than a few weeks.", "summary": "Been dating someone who lives an hour away, doesn't text much anymore, still see each other every other weekend. Is this normal or is he not interested anymore?"}
{"id": "t3_rwxpa", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Keeping your dog entertained while at work", "post": "Hello everyone. I recently got dog who is a mixed breed, 3 yr old female. She has been excellent so far (no accidents, no unwanted chewing), but I would love to have some way to keep her entertained while I'm away at work. I currently leave the television on and make sure she has had at least a 1/2 hr to an hour walk before I leave (it is/will be tough to walk for an hour when I need to be at work at 4:45am--it's not often, but it happens. Generally the later I have to go into work, I make sure to walk her for longer and more frequently). She is used to being left alone for longer periods of time--outside--, according to her previous owner, but since she is such a smart dog, I don't want her to become bored with nothing to do. (I have owned dogs before, but this is the first time that I have a dog who is alone", "summary": "I'm looking for ideas about how to keep my dog entertained while I'm not at home. How do you all do it with your dog?"}
{"id": "t3_1w2fkb", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Maybe a dumb question, but does home maintenance count as a reason to use the emergency fund?", "post": "Obviously there's context here.  Things like a frozen pipe that bursts in the winter are clearly an emergency.\n\nBut there's a lot of things I'm not sure how to classify.  There are lots of costs of home ownership I *know* I will have to incur, although maybe not *when* I have to pay for them, such as:\n\n* Furnace replacement\n* Re-roofing the house\n* Replacing major appliances (washer, dryer, etc)\n\nDo these things count?  Or should I be saving separately for this?\n\nI ask, because I'm finding myself a bit spread thin; I have money auto-deducted from my paycheque that goes to building my emergency fund, savings for my annual gym membership, my RSPs (I'm Canadian - this is like IRAs), my pension, etc.\n\nShould I be budgeting even more money for the re-roof I'll need to do in ~3-5 years, or is that what the emergency fund is for?", "summary": "Known expenses of home ownership - do they get paid out from your emergency fund, or should I be saving separately for each of them as well?"}
{"id": "t3_53uxgl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] have found myself feeling inferior/jealous around my friend [19F].", "post": "Throwaway because I know how petty of an issue this is and I don't want it associated with my main.\n\nSo I [19F] have a good friend that I'm honestly very jealous of. Let's call her Grace [19F]. First of all, Grace is literally the epitome of everything good and sweet in the world. She's the type of girl that doesn't look like she could harm a fly. Just a really sweet, mild temperament. She's very humble and doesn't see what literally everybody else sees in her. She's generous, kind, and an extremely great friend. I seriously have zero problems with her, she's supportive and loyal and everything you'd want a friend to be.\n\nGrace also happens to be 5\"8, lithe (think dancer's body type) perpetually tan, has very nice hair and very pretty blue eyes, and is just generally a really gorgeous person. Nearly every time we hang out I see guys checking her out/staring at her. I cringe every time I see a picture of us together because of the stark contrast between us. I'm 5\"5, pale, still thin but not the same body type as her, have boring brown eyes, and my hair....it's long and wavy and generally just all over the place. I don't think I'm necessarily \"ugly\", but in comparison to her, I'm definitely the inferior looking one.\n\nAs I said before, I have ZERO problems with Grace. She's one of the best friends I've ever had, and an all-around great person. I've just been finding myself feeling insecure when I'm around her lately. She's pretty, smart, kind, generous, has an great boyfriend, a great circle of friends, etc. It's almost getting exhausting being around someone that seems so perfect. I know that no one is actually perfect, and I know that these feelings of jealously are stemming from my own insecurities. I just don't know how to deal with it. I'm tired of feeling ugly and inferior around her. She's such an awesome person and doesn't deserve any negative feelings directed towards her. Any advice/words of wisdom?\n_____________________________________________________________________________________", "summary": "One of my [19F] good friends [19F] is basically the embodiment of perfection and it makes me feel insecure."}
{"id": "t3_1ubj2l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have you ever had to break-up with a SO for logistical reasons? How did it go?", "post": "I am a 24 year old male, I live with my SO right now the UK, and we are both from the US. I have to return to the US very soon while she remains here for another 6 months. The real problem though is that we are moving back to different states and don't think we will ever live in the same place again. Other than that we have a wonderful relationship. We have pretty much accepted that we have to break-up unless we want to be long distance for years. \nSo are there any other Redditors out there who have ended a relationship for logistical reasons? How did it go? Did you remain friends? Did you get back together? \nThanks for sharing.", "summary": "SO and I are moving to different places for many years so we are breaking up. Have you had a similar experience? What happened?"}
{"id": "t3_1qgki3", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Personal ledger vs. online banking -- why actually keeping track of your expenses matters", "post": "I know that keeping track of your expenses is a no brainer...  everyone knows they should be doing that.  But, I wanted to offer a warning to people who are relying on the balance reported by their bank, particularly financial responsibility noobs who have tight budgets.\n\nI have been banking online almost exclusively for several years.  When I first started out, I thought it would be the most convenient, hassle-free, error-free way to keep track of spending... after all, it's all right there for me to see, anytime I'm online.  But, I noticed quickly that my mental balance was different than the balance shown on my account.  Why?  Because purchases don't necessarily happen in real time with real amounts.  Various merchants will sometimes authorize a smaller amount before actually charging the full amount.  Consider the case where I spend $60 to fill my car with gas.  Three days later, the $60 has still not left my account.  There is, however, a $1 authorization charge, which will change later.  If I just go by the balance reported by my bank, I will think that I have more money than I actually have.  This happens also anytime you leave a tip.  **Note that it almost never goes the opposite direction.  You will almost never have more money in your account than is being reported by your bank.  This is a systematic error.**\n\nFor me, at any given time, I would say that my reported balance is about $100 *more* than the money I actually have.  If you're running a tight ship like I am, that's a large margin of error.", "summary": "Keep track of your expenses indepently because the balance reported by your bank is usually an *overestimate* of what you actually have."}
{"id": "t3_2yb31v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a [21/F] and I'v been with my [21/M] Boyfriend for a while, his mother does not approve? Advice?", "post": "I'v been with my boyfriend for some time now and his mother has met me before. We've both decided we wanna actually spend our lives together and have been planning for that day now (our wedding). We're both adults, pay our taxes, work, ect ect. But when he brought up to his mother that he was possibly gonna be moving to where I live, she blew up.\nNow, his reason for wanting to leave was personal. It was to find another job and build dependency because he felt really uneasy being where he was at. He pretty much isn't happy with where his current living condition is and wants to make a change in life.\nNow, some pointers I should tell you guys about is my boyfriend is Chinese. And his mother is from Hong Kong China, so she has traditional values N what not...I'm Hispanic, grew up in a traditional hispanic house hold. \n\nShe was okay with him dating me, she didn't take it as anything serious. But when she saw that we where planning our futures together, she even went as far as cutting his phone service off and refusing to allow him to leave out of the city to see me.\n(Keep in mind he lives with his mother to finish school, he pays for his own schools and pays for the car he drives, however its under her name.)\nShe went as far as pulling the race card, telling him that \"Mexican girls are lazy, and cling to a good man whenever they can\"\n\nI feel hurt, i feel lost, and above all else he's hurting. He's made it clear that she's not gonna have any affect on us being together but she's trying her hardest to restrict him from seeing me or even talking to me...Next week i'm adding him to my phone plan (i have my own) and we're going to save up money together so he can get another car under his name so she can't have any power over him.\nIt just...really hurts. I really need some advice on how I can get through to his mother that i'm right for him. I love this man like no one else.", "summary": "Boyfriend's chinese mother dosn't like me because i'm hispanic, is trying to keep us apart."}
{"id": "t3_102xzv", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[23/m]Solving a guilty conscience", "post": "Hi; sorry if this isn't the correct subreddit, but I thought you would have some advice!\n\nSo I ended up at a random club on Friday, and to cut a long story short, had way too much to drink. \n\nI messaged a girl that was at the club that I met a few days earlier and goes to my uni (also single, recently broken up). All I remember doing is very incoherently asking her (at the end of the night) if she wanted to go out at some point.\n\nI sent her apologies and another message on facebook the day after. I haven't received any replies.\n\nI don't really mind if I don't end up with a date. However, I am the sort of person that gets very guilty about these things. I can't for the life of me remember anything else about the night (It's a miracle I stumbled home...). The fact that I haven't received any replies worries me that I might have done something awful (I have no record of this in the past, but hell, I can't remember).\n\nI know it's entirely entirely my fault for having so much to drink. But I'm feeling very guilty. The way I see it, I have two options: 1) Message her on facebook again asking if I had done anything wrong, and that I feel terribly guilty about it or 2) Leaving it be. I don't want to bug her. Unfortunately the guilt would still tear me up, and it hasn't left over the course of three days.\n\nOn holiday at the moment, so can't contact her physically.", "summary": "Drunken night, minimal memory, very guilty that I've really offended a certain girl. Will another fb message bug her or is it appropriate?"}
{"id": "t3_4yge5q", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[CA] I got a terrible surprise chemical peel, how can I be reimbursed for subsequent dermatologist bills?", "post": "Hi folks,\nI need some help here. I posted in /r/SkincareAddiction and got the advise to check in with you guys here. I don't know the first thing about legal matters or where to start...\n\nThis is what happened:\n\nI went in for a Hydrafacial facial in June. The aesthetician did a Chemical Peel as a surprise upgrade without discussing it with me. The results were disaster. I had deep burns immediately afterwards that left scabs all over my face that took 3 weeks to heal. It goes without saying that during that time I was in a lot of pain as well/took days off work to sit in a dimly lit room and ice my face. The spots where I had the scabbing left red scars after the scabs closed up. I followed up with a dermatologist and he did a V-beam treatment to reduce the redness and it helped.\n\nThe salon has refused to refund the treatment or offer anything to help speed up the healing process. They are insisting that my reaction is completely normal and is a healthy part of the skincare process. The first time I went in seeking help they said that the only thing that will help with the pain and potential scarring is if I purchase their products for which I was quoted another $200! \n\nThe spa manager promised a full refund but ended up only offering a partial refund and has been unreachable since that time. I got fed up after a month of being in pain and dealing with the spa shenanigans so I called my credit card company and requested that they dispute this charge.\n\nWhat do I do now though? Ideally, I would like the spa to comp me what I paid for the dermatologist treatment to fix the scarring on my face that was caused by them and any products I need to use for healing.\nHas anyone been in this situation or know what I can do or expect in cases like this?", "summary": "I got a surprise chemical peel at horrid spa with terrible results, need advise on how to get follow up dermatologist visits comped."}
{"id": "t3_39o4sw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My wife [F/25] has been talking to an ex behind my [M/25] and it's gotten serious, but she has no clue I know.", "post": "My wife and I have been going through a stressful time in life. Almost all of the stress has been caused apart from the relationship, however, we are beginning to grow apart due to the way we have handled the stress. Long story short, she has started to talk to her ex who she dated over 5 years ago and lives across the country from us. They have mentioned how they want to run away together jokingly(He is married as well). My wife and I have been very close up until the last 3 months when our living situation changed. I feel like much of her talking to him has to deal with her venting to him and finding someone to talk to. She has no clue I have seen all of her texts. We are working on correcting our relationship issues and moving on, so far it has gone well. But this is a major setback and a huge surprise to me. How do I approach her about it to find out her true intentions without running the risk of it blowing out of proportion if it actually is what I, and my friends, suspect it to be.. a crutch?", "summary": "How do I approach my wife on who she has been talking to without the truth being distorted due to me hiding my knowledge?"}
{"id": "t3_3e38m4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Stuck in a bad cycle, how to get out?", "post": "He is 24, and I am 21. We've been seeing each other for around half a year now. We both agreed on that we're in stages of our lives where we're not ready to be \"boyfriend/girlfriend\" because we are both total messes, yet we do everything like a couple would. Now don't get me wrong, this isn't one of those \"He just isn't into you\" situations because I'm the one refusing to be his \"girlfriend\"\n\nI know he's loyal, ready to be in a relationship, and will never wrong me. But the same problems we've talked about still exist: He has no passion about anything - I can't let him only passion be me. He is unmotivated and can't fight for what he wants. The list could go on and on but he's basically not what I'm looking for in a partner.\n\nHe's already said I love you, I've said it a few times before as well and I really felt it too when I did. But after we spend time together, I always feel so empty. Like something's missing. I know I shouldn't even be questioning what love is if what I was feeling was really love.. I catch myself Google-ing for answers. I see posts telling me love means seeing past the other's flaws. I know I haven't, and not only that but his flaws are starting to irritate me more and more.\n\nI've tried ending things with him but both of us are too weak to let go. We rely on each other too much and he isn't able to let go. I'm honestly so miserable most of the time, even though we don't fight. He's understanding, sensitive, sweet, and most things a girl would wish for. Part of me just wishes he would cheat on me or do something outrageous so I could break it off with him. I don't know what's wrong with me, why can't I just live in the moment and enjoy it? How do I get out?", "summary": "In a relationship but something's missing. Don't want to hurt him but don't know how to get out either. I'm miserable."}
{"id": "t3_2lvj7j", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Give it a second, it's going to space! My opinion on plateaus, loose skin, frustration and relapse.", "post": "Hi Loseit,\n\nA little bit of a rant because I see so many posts here that are along the lines of I've lost 50, 75, 100+lbs and have plateaued, or about loose skin, or feeling large even though they've lost large amounts of weight, or frustration with where they are fitness wise, and it makes me think of a running joke my partner and I have. Any time something is taking awhile, or we need to be patient for something we tend to say \"give it a second, it's going to space\" in reference to this Louis CK bit \n\nMy opinion is people need to chill a little when they hit these frustrating points. Bodies are natural systems, respect yours, it can only change so much so fast. The changes some people here are making are so all encompassing that encountering these problems means you deserve a pat on the back because they represent just how far you've come. Plateau after losing 100lbs? It makes me think \"oh, you're frustrated? And are you virtually unrecognizable from who you were last year? Are you able to fucking enter a gym without feeling awkward? Let alone exercise without feeling like death?\". The plateau will break, the loose skin will rebound, and mental perceptions will shift, but your body might as well be going to space for how much you're asking it to do. It takes years to get really unfit give yourself time to get healthy, internally, externally, and mentally.", "summary": "Congratulate yourself for where you're at and keep working towards the person you want to be. Don't berate yourself for where you feel you should be."}
{"id": "t3_26hj7u", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My (26M) girlfriend (22F) just started dating, at first I insisted on paying for most dates. Is it too late to shift the balance more equally now?", "post": "*shit, title should be: My girlfriend and I just started dating*\n\nWe started dating about a month ago and have hit it off extremely well. I seriously adore everything about her, and I don't mind paying for most things we do together as I like to spoil her. She is definitely very caring and offered to pay several times for our first few dates but I declined. Now she hasn't offered, which isn't a huge problem, but I'd like her to pay for some things a little more often. \n\nThis is a factor because we go out together 4-5 times a week. I don't care (nor want) for it to be 50/50 but instead maybe 70/30. Right now it's 95/5", "summary": "Is it too late to ask her to pay more often sometimes, without coming off as an ass? What do I say?"}
{"id": "t3_3riqz1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I 22m feel like I can't let go of an on-again off-again relationship (22f)", "post": "It's a very long story so I'm going to summarize the best I can. For as long as I could remember I have had trouble relating to people, so it has been hard to find many intimate relationships. Sometimes I think I'm too boring, or neurotic. That's besides the point.\n\nI got to know this girl in highschool, never able to date her until after highschool though. We dated for a year, even started staying together during college in our own place (too soon), it became clear she was verbally abusive and at the end physical. It hurt me so much to end like we did though, she seemed like my missing puzzle piece.\n\nSo she did some awful stuff, said some bad things about my mom (that she heard), and started dating my friend. She left him soon after we met up for lunch, and for a few months we were steady. It ended rough, not nearly as rough as the first go, and she began dating this guy at her work.\n\nThey dated awhile until he dropped her, and she rebounded on his friend for a few months (even she will say this was a questionable decision). Meanwhile I started dating someone else, moved in with them too quick and we recently separated. I pay the price of having her as a roommate now, something we both wish were a little different.\n\nWell what do you know I have lunch with this old flame again, and now we text. She said she's seeking professional help regarding what happened between us, she seems so genuine.\n\nShe makes me worry about how often I text her, I get butterflies when I know we are hanging out, I get excited. I feel so melodramatic asking myself if I will ever feel like this about someone else. When do I know to try again or keep looking for something new? I've always felt like we have had a bond. \n\nIs this just what people experience when they don't date much people? I have dated 3 people seriously. She's the only person I've thought about consistently since I was 16, she enters my mind from time to time. It just seems like we keep making the same mistakes until they bring us back to each other.", "summary": "thought I found the *one* when I was 16, dated her at 18, split up at 20, dated again before going into a serious relationship, now that that one is over she has entered back into my life."}
{"id": "t3_3e8szg", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by making a vulgar hand gesture in front of my entire class (Kinda-NSFW)", "post": "Hey guys, so TIFU in front of all my classmates and didn't realize it until after my teacher pointed it out.\n\nI'm currently taking an intro to psychology class over the summer at my university. Today in class we talked about Motivation and Emotion, covering a chapter per day as usual. One of the topics is the Drive Reduction Theory of Motivation, where physiological needs cause internal drives and the organism acts to satisfy the need, and tension is reduced. We tied it to sex because college kids, and the issues of meeting online people for sex came up (Tinder, Craigslist, Grindr) and then someone compared that scenario to an Uber taxi, since the driver of the Uber is a stranger. I talked about how one Uber driver locked the back doors of his vehicle and started masturbating next to the female passenger.\n\nExcept I made the hand motion while I told the class that the guy was masturbating. \n\nSo my professor busts out laughing, my friends bust out laughing (our class is like 10 people so we're all friends here) and the guys at the end of the table who couldn't see my hand motion asked me to do it again. They probably thought I'd actually SEEN the video and not just heard about it. I laughed it off but was pretty embarrassed, realized I needed to cut down my guy-friend exposure time, as I've clearly been desensitized to the social norm of not making obscene gestures in a university class.", "summary": "Made jacking-off motion in front of professor and classmates in plain sight while telling story, am made fun of, am embarrassed."}
{"id": "t3_3f93v7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] encouraged my boyfriend [22M] to sleep with another woman.", "post": "We've been having problems. I'm moving back to my home state and I've been more than depressed and anxious for a couple of months. We had 2 huge fights in the last couple of days. \n\nRecently, he started talking to some other girls online. I encouraged that. After this huge fight yesterday, I thought we were good. He called me today and told me he wanted to sleep with some girl. I told him to go for it. I felt guilty because he told me he wanted to experience what was out there (I'm pretty sure I put that idea in his head) and that he was in a rough spot because he felt trapped. \n\nHe said some pretty nasty things to me in our argument last night. We have since said sorry to each other, but this felt like rubbing salt in the wound. He told me he hated coming home to me. That he would rather sleep or be at work. He told me to pack my shit and get out. We talked a little more and ended up staying together. \n\nHe's a generally positive person and he hates being around negativity. I have a terrible habit of being negative and I have started going to therapy to get my depression and anxiety under control, but lately it's been raging. I've been dealing with these problems for years. \n\nI feel guilty because he tells me its my fault that he can't enjoy being in his home state. He resents me because I encouraged our move here and now I'm miserable. I've been looking for jobs lately, but everyone knows what that's like. He's angry with me because I've been slacking on cleaning a bit lately and keep making empty promises. \n\nThe point is that I encouraged him to sleep with another woman and he did. And now I'm deeply hurt and angry. Mostly at myself. I feel devastated and heartbroken. I'm sleeping in the other room in our apartment because I don't want to sleep in the same bed they fucked in. I feel disgusted even looking at him and it's my fault. \n\nI guess I don't really have a question. I just wonder if I'm wrong in all of this.", "summary": "I encouraged my boyfriend to sleep with another woman after we've been having problems. He did and now I'm disgusted and heartbroken. Am I wrong to feel this way?"}
{"id": "t3_21r29b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18m) would really appreciate relationship advice regarding the girl I am with (18f)", "post": "I'm an 18 year old male who has been with a girl for about 3 months now. I should mention that this is the strongest I've ever felt about a girl I've been in a relationship with and that this is probably the most advanced relationship I've ever been in (i.e. It doesn't just feel like one of your typical high school relationships to me, I truly care about her) It's clear that we both really like each other but I constantly worry for a bunch of reasons. \n\nAbout a week or so ago she brought up the conversation of what our label was (which I was too scared to bring up because I was worried her definition for what we were would be much less than what mine was). We both ultimately came up with the conclusion that we are dating. Fast forward a few weeks, I find out from my friends that she  constantly and firmly tells them that her and I are not dating. This made me upset because then I think that she feels differently about me than she says she does. \n\nThe back story to her past relationships is that almost a year ago her boyfriend of two years broke up with her because he was going to college. I know she was in love with him and it pains me that no matter what I could never live up to what he was to her. Do you think this may have something to do with her saying we aren't dating behind my back? Maybe dating isn't even the right word, perhaps we are at the point where we are in a relationship. The other thing is that she pretty much freaks out if anyone if thinks that I'm her boyfriend or she's my girlfriend. She insists that she really likes me and really cares about me, but sometimes I just worry. What do you think of all this?", "summary": "Girl and I come to conclusion that we are dating but she insists to everyone else behind my back that we aren't dating"}
{"id": "t3_4b7j5b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with this girl that I almost dated[18 F] She ended it because she still has feelings for her cheating Ex.", "post": "So we had started dating and things were getting very serious, she had some trust issues because this guy cheated on her with her brother's girlfriend, so we were taking it slow. The two of us are both in college so things usually move quick anyway. Regardless everything was fantastic, and we had our spring Break in which she just went home for the week, which is 4 hours away. \n\nShe still hangs out with the guy that cheated on her and realizes that she still has feelings for him, the day that we return she talks to me to tell me that she would feel too guilty going any further with me, knowing she had strong feelings for someone else. I was totally blindsided, but even though it hurts a lot, my main concern is her going back and getting hurt by this guy again, i don't know how to handle this situation.", "summary": "The girl that I was dating still has strong feelings for her ex who cheated on her with her brother's girlfriend, and not only do I want to keep her but I truly don't want her getting hurt"}
{"id": "t3_3ax1hp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30M] with my Girlfriend [36F] 2 years, I was accused of cheating on her and she's leaving me for it.", "post": "Approximately 2 months ago I was accused of cheating on my girlfriend by an individual who I was on friendly terms with who had expressed interest in dating me several years ago. I made it very clear at that time that there would not be a relationship. The accuser actually showed up at my girlfriends house drunk and dragged her to my home and proceeded to scream and assault me.\n\nSince this initial accusation I've been trying to work actively to reaffirm my commitment to my girlfriend and regain her trust, but we've settled into a 2 steps forward 2 steps back routine which culminated over the past weekend in her returning all of my belongings and cleaning her things out of my home.\n\nI've gone out of my way to give her everything she's asked for and several things she hasn't (fb password, email password, access to mobile records - we're on the same plan).  I've even committed to seeing a therapist for my supposed fidelity/honesty issues and have asked her to come with me.\n\nNothing seems to be working and she's pretty much checked out.  I know this seems like a no brainer, but I love her.  I'd built her a home in my life that I intended to be a long term thing and I'm terrified by the prospect of losing her.\n\nCan anyone offer advice on regaining trust and basically rebuilding a very important personal relationship from ashes?", "summary": "GF had accusations that I cheated on her leveled against me.  Two months running of no real progress on returning.  What can I do to rebuild?"}
{"id": "t3_1rijs4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17 M] need advice with crush [19 F]", "post": "I'm not sure what to do.. \n\nWe've hung out and gone out to eat a few times, we see each quite a bit because we work together, and we text/talk a lot.  It's been like this for several months now, but has heated up more within the last month.  She has told me I'm one of her best guy friends, and she has expressed interest in going to college together so our \"friendship\" doesn't end.  I want to tell her how I really feel, but I don't want work to become super awkward either.  I've never been one for reading signals and hints, so I couldn't tell you if she's been hinting at a more serious relationship.  \n\nIf we didn't work together, I feel like I could just tell her my true feelings.  It's too overwhelming right now because I really like her, but this messes up my approach to selecting a college, and could throw a wrench into my work.  Also some additional info, she doesn't already have BF or anything like that, we don't go to the same school, and we've already talked about going to prom together.", "summary": "Co-worker who I really like and talk to says we are good \"friends\" and I don't know how or if I should tell her how I really feel.."}
{"id": "t3_ksflq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How did any of you, who have completed College level education, go about doing Critical Analytic Reflections?", "post": "I've done compare and contrast essays and I've done Critical Reflections. But never Critical Analytic Reflections. So **What Am I supposed to Write About?** \n\nThis is what our Prof said: \n1) Choose one core idea/concept from one of the readings **Ok Good, that's pretty basic**\n2) Explore \"One Idea\" more in depth than discuss more material but more superficially **Ok, I guess I'll talk about what my idea is and what it's about first to fill up space\"\n3) DO NOT DESCRIBE. ANALYZE. ASSUME READER KNOWS TEXT. **So, I guess my idea above is not going to work...**\n\nLet's say my topic is about Justice. So if I assume the reader knows EVERYTHING about justice, and there is no room for me to say anything about it. Then what should I be saying at all?", "summary": "How do I write a Critical Analytic Reflection paper while leaving out all the details already covered in the reading and assuming everything I know; my marker knows."}
{"id": "t3_2wmf7w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my friend [19 F] has a little bit of a thing but things went badly.", "post": "So there is this girl that I was friends with in high school, we didn't talk much. So basically she started going to the same university as me and we started talking. She told me she flirted with me all of high school and that I showed no interest. Anyways somehow we ended up talking about sex blah blah and we both want to have sex with each other. So I kinda led her on for about two weeks, and at the beginning of this she said that she didn't just fuck around, which is weird because she is in a relationship and us having sex would mean he cheating. Actually given some of the things we have said to each other I would consider that she has already cheated, although not physically. Along the way I hinted strongly that I wasn't interest in her emotionally and that I was not looking for a relationship. Eventually I told it to her flat out and she got upset, saying that \"she's not just a piece of meat\". I guess I set it up so that she would get pissed at me and not sleep with me. I'm a virgin and I think she expects that I would develop feelings for her as a result of sex. I said \"If you wanted sex and friendship but nothing more, then why would you be mad for me saying I wouldn't give anything more?\" She said \"That's not how sex works. We both know it. Plus who said that's what I wanted. I was saying I knew where YOU stood. And for me that's not okay. Because I'm worth everything and more than that.\" and \"Like if it happened it happened but to just come out and say it? You're an asshole.\". I feel like she is mad because I said I don't want to develop feelings for her and I was to keep it strictly physical. Well now it's not going to happen anyways, and I obviously screwed up because I shouldn't be talking like that to someone who is dating someone else, but I wanted to know what people think of this just from reading it. If you think I'm an asshole speak up, if not say whatever you feel, and if you need things clarified let me know, I will try to make this a bit more readable.", "summary": "A friend reacted badly when i told her that even though she wanted sex and feelings with me, I only wanted sex. How should I handle the situation?"}
{"id": "t3_1roeyc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "[Serious] How can I tell my mother politely, that she is dealing with our dog in an inappropriate way?", "post": "My mother watched Cesar Millan a lot before we got our dog, and she acted like she knew everything there was to know about training and raising a dog. \n\nIts been about 2 years with our dog, and he has a problem with barking at the door when people go to open it (doesn't seem like that much of a problem to me). My mother's reaction is to yell at him, or if he does it sequentially, she will strike him in the thigh/rear end.\n\nWhenever I step in and try and take control of the situation, she will get mad, and try and tell me how to handle this kind of thing, because she thinks she is a dog expert. (This upsets me because it feels like I am being talked down to)\n\nThe last strand was crossed today, when I was in the basement watching tv, I heard my dog bark at the door, and then my mother get up and yell at him. He ran into our sun room, which is above the basement, and I could hear her hit him, and his paws skid on the floor. I went up to check on him (he was fine, no damage, happy little guy when he's with me) and my mother yelled at me to put him back in the room where he is to stay \"for a long long time\" because he tried to bite her when she was \"disciplining\" him.\n\nHer solution to my dogs problem is completely inappropriate, and no way to treat a dog. I believe in positive reinforcement, and I am getting very frustrated listening to her complain about my dog, and her inappropriate ways of dealing with his barking.\n\nSo if anyone knows a way I can tell her what she is doing is wrong, or if there is a way I can try and get my dog to stop barking at the door, please let me know.", "summary": "My mother deals with my dogs barking by yelling or hitting. I would like to let her know what she is doing is wrong, or if there is a way to teach my dog to not bark at the door."}
{"id": "t3_2vdvm6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (16 f) want to stop being friends with (16 f) while remaining best friends with her sister (16 f)?", "post": "So I know this problem will be resolved on it's own when I go to college in a year and a half, but for now, it has become a very complex issue that I'm not sure how to handle. I've known these two friends since pre-school and they happen to live in my same neighborhood so naturally we talk often and have all grown kind of close over the years. They are twins, so I've usually hung out with both of them together. However, they each have very different personalities and their traits have even grown more distinct throughout high school and I am beginning to absolutely despise one of the twins (I'll refer to her as A).\n\n A has, over the period of about a year, become extrememly moody, aggressive, and exhausting to talk to. Our personalities conflict and we bicker often. I am usually able to laugh it off; she holds grudges. She has started conflicts with me for absolutely no reason and it has progressed to the point where I no longer enjoy being around her and I automatically feel defensive whenever I see her, because of her offensive attitude. \n\nHowever, B & I (the other twin) are the best of friends. Our personalities compliment each other well, and the conflict between A & I has only served to strengthen our friendship. We get along well. I just don't see how I will be able to remain friends with her if I plan to cut A out of my life (even though they \"hate\" each other, they do everything together and have the same mutual friends). It is incredibly frustrasting and I feel I am causing even more conflict between the two of them. For example, A & B give me rides to school (they share a car) sometimes work as well, but after an argument, A told me she would no longer provide transportion for me. I know B however, will not let that happen, and that they will argue and fight over this for some time. I just don't know what to do.", "summary": "Friends with twins, A & B. A is a bitch. How do I stop being friends with her while staying friends with B?"}
{"id": "t3_448st2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my GF [19F] 3.5 months LDR communication issues.", "post": "So I've been going out with this girl since last July, and in October we decided to make it 'official'. She said she wanted to be my girlfriend (prior to that we defined our relationship as an 'open' one). I asked her if she was sure, and then I told her that I would love it if she was my girlfriend. \n\nWe are both in University approximately 150 miles away from each other, so we don't get to see each other that often. \n\nShe isn't your typical 19 year old who is glued to her phone all day, however she does check it once and a while but rarely replies to my messages. I don't know how to address this issue. We send a couple of texts a day and on weekends we chat on the phone. During the week we may send a couple of snapchats, but that's the extent of it.\n\nI'm her first boyfriend and I'm not sure if that is why she is so bad at communicating. She is very inconsistent and I don't feel like she communicates with me as her boyfriend. Occasionally she'll call me 'hot stuff' or 'babe' but usually it's 'dude' or 'man'.  Her inconsistency in communicating makes me feel like she is not taking this seriously, or making an effort. Sometimes I worry that there is someone else and I asked her once but she said no. I want to trust her, but given my past experiences it is difficult. Especially with the lack of communication on her behalf. Sometimes I think she's just worried we're going to run out of conversation topics and that's why she replies so sporadically. \n\nAm I overthinking this? Is this normal in early phases of relationships, especially long-distance ones? Maybe I'm just used to clingier girls? \n\nAny help, advice, or input is greatly appreciated!!!\n\nThanks guys!", "summary": "GF is very inconsistent in communicating. I'm afraid she's cheating. Is it because she is new to the whole 'relationship' thing? Maybe I'm overthinking this?"}
{"id": "t3_2agth3", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I'm not even 18 and I think I've made a mess of my life already.", "post": "Warning: long\n\nI used to be a good kid. I had good grades. I told very few lies and I was respectful to everyone. I don't know what triggered it. It's like the part of my brain that made me care about stuff stopped working. I started getting bad grades in school. I mean like really bad. I was lucky enough not to get summer school but i still did awful. The worst part is that they spent a lot of money on tutoring lessons for an ap exam and i ended up getting a 2. I also cheated alot on tests. I started lying to my parents and told them i was studying when i was doing other stuff. Then when they started seeing a decline in grades they grounded me. I would usually learn my lesson and pull myself out of situations like these but i didnt this time. I kept doing bad stuff and I started disrespecting my own parents and my siblings who were just trying to help me. I eventually lost most of my friends and i put on a huge amount of weight and I started doing bad things. I started lying to my mom and said that i was walking home with friends/staying afterschool but i actually withdrew money from my bank account and spent it on junkfood/useless shit and coming home late. I'm suprised they still let me do it for the rest of the school year. I also started stealing money from my family members because i had used all of mine. They never found out, but i feel terrible about it. I've been trying to study/exercise but i can never stick to any of these habits.", "summary": "I'm 15 years old, i have no friends, i am a thief, a liar, my GPA/future in education is ruined, i weigh 200 pounds, and I don't know what to do. please help"}
{"id": "t3_24vojb", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Possibly losing motivation", "post": "It's what I wanted from the beginning. People are now recognizing my weight loss and I'm not even half way into my journey. The act of people telling me on a regular basis that I look alot better has been giving me some motivation...but it's been giving me something else. Deep in my mind it's been giving me the idea that if I get satisfied with the compliment...if I say \"Thanks! I've been working out\", that I'm going to feel like I've achieved my goal.  \n  \nLosing fat, to me, has been an asthetic goal all along. I wanted to be seen as something different than just another fat guy. It feels great to be able to run a mile or to see yourself lifting more weights than some other guys in the gym (you know it's true). But when it comes down to it, it's just been about how people see me. Getting this positive attention is what I really wanted. Now that I'm getting it, I feel that I'm going to lose some of my motivation.  \n  \nMy stats are SW:335, CW: 290, GW: ~210, 6'0. I've been at this for almost three months now and I feel that this is going to be the deciding point. I can either slip back to where I started, or be a man and push through until I'm satisfied with myself.  \n\nThis is mainly just me venting, I'm sorry to bother with my insecurities. I don't really vent to anyone so at some points it has to go somewhere. Have some of you been in a similar situation? How did you deal with it?", "summary": "Satisfaction from compliments on my weight loss up to this point may reduce my motivation to keep going. Have you dealt with something similar and if so how did you proceed?"}
{"id": "t3_1ox08m", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My girlfriend [23f] of 3 months is really starting to confuse me [24m].", "post": "So I met this girl on OKCupid around 3 months ago and we really hit it off. I hadn't dated in a very long time so I was really just aiming to get back out there, nothing too serious. One thing lead to another and things seem to be pretty serious now. Much more on her end than mine.\n\nI'm lagging behind in terms of how I feel about her. She really likes me while I'm just moving out of the \"this is a good friend\" stage.\n\n Things like randomly saying the names of her exes (who she claims to hate), telling me about how she gave her actual number to a drunk guy at a bar she was at or how she would definitely date one of her coworkers (that I've met before) if we stopped dating. I'm trying to be patient and let things work themselves out, but she does some things that make me question if I should even allow my feelings to catch up to hers.\n\nSorry if that came off kind of rant-y. I don't have anyone in real life to talk to about this stuff so I just needed to get it off of my chest. I can clarify anything if need be.\n \nI've kind of brushed off each of these things, but I'm nearly positive that if I were to say anything of the sort to her she would flip out on me. Those are red flags right? Or am I just reading to much into nothing. Should I just end things now or let things play out a little more?", "summary": "Girlfriend has done/said some strange things to me about other guys and I am curious if the relationship is worth enduring."}
{"id": "t3_3jrvei", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [36M] am trapped behind my emotional walls.", "post": "I have build some pretty impressive walls around me emotionally. Everyone I've ever cared about or said they cared about me has hurt me pretty significantly. (I know this can't be objectively true but that's how it feels) So keep my distance.\n\nI don't trust people not to turn on me. Hell it took me 2 years to trust my therapist and I pay the guy to keep my secrets. Predictably, this has made friendship difficult and relationships impossible.\n\nI've been trying to get closer to people but it causes a ton of anxiety. I start assuming the person I'm dealing with is pulling away or is going to stab me in the back. I've tried investing emotionally in a few people but it's never seemed to pay out and that just discourages me even more.\n\nHow do I make investing emotionally in people less terrifying and handle things if/when they don't go the way I'd like.\n\nIt sucks, my job involves being around all day and they seem to like me, but I can't just open up and allow myself to let them in.", "summary": "Trapped in my ivory tower of emotion. Its lonely and really windy up here. How the Hell do I climb down?"}
{"id": "t3_3pkwy6", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[23M] First time dating in this country(USA), and it's online dating, advice please :)", "post": "Hi there, first time posting here, a bit of a background info about me.\n\nMoved here a few years ago, had 1 touchy/physical fling (Mexican), 1 GF through mutual friend (7 month relationship, Asian), but never actually went on a date with an white American girl before. Met her through OkCupid. Btw, I'm Chinese.\n\nSo.. I asked her out on next Monday and she agreed to it. And we're meeting at a Mall. But I realize, I don't really know the etiquette of dating. Besides dating with mutual friends.\n\nI read online on some guides, tips, advice, do's and don'ts but I'd like to ask what you personally learned through experience.\n\nHere are my question(s),\n\nCan I tell her that I'm nervous and I've never actually done something like this before?\n\nWhat would be a bad idea to do for a first time date in a Mall?", "summary": "Don't know dating etiquette, never dated someone I've never met. Please enlighten me on some tips and advice for dating."}
{"id": "t3_2nsfem", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (F/19) confused about whether I should stay with him (M/18).", "post": "I'm a girl who has only had short term relationships. I just dated people because that was the thing to do in high school... I'm now in University and have met a guy that I would love to try and go the distance. He says he really likes me and we act like we're dating, but he broke up with his long time girl at the beginning of the semester and has episodes of missing her, I'm totally for waiting and not pushing him into anything but it puts a lot of emotional stress on everything because I don't know if I should be there for him as a friend instead. I know what I want, but he doesn't know and I'm confused if I should move on until he figures it out?", "summary": "Guy breaks up with long time girlfriend. Meets me, we have this dating-type thing, has waves of missing ole girl, doesn't know what he wants and I do. Should I stay or move on?"}
{"id": "t3_12oswe", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So Reddit, what do you think would be the best way to troll someone over tumblr (details inside)?", "post": "A friend of my mine recently found out my tumblr and created a new account made to mimic mine. Same pic, same layout, same theme, and just changed the name by one letter so it's hardly noticeable. He also apparently sends messages to my bf (whom he's also good friends with) to try and confuse him. I'm sure he knows both my bf and I know and it's all in good fun, my bf and I both think it's hilarious, but we both want to try and mess with him as much as we can. One thing I should mention is that I'm currently abroad so the only thing I can do is via the internet, though my bf would probably be willing to step in for some more personal fun, we're both just at a loss for what to do. So Reddit, what would you do to mess with him as much as possible?", "summary": "a friend created a tumblr account to mimic mine in every way possible. What can I do to mess with him?"}
{"id": "t3_3s5c91", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my ex [20F] of 4 years, broke up and I really advices help getting over the shitty feeling", "post": "Hi,\n\nMy ex broke up with me because she didn't feel the same way anymore and wanted to move on and meet other guys, which according to what she told me, did happen already. I am 100% aware that the relationship is over and I am 100% trying to move on right now.\n\nMy friends are extremely supportive and they always chill and distract me until late at night when they go home. I also got new hobbies like lifting, got a new haircut and did changes to my life to try and be a brand new person. However, I am having problems like not being able to sleep at night and even if I do, end up waking up extremely early. \n\nAt night, my heart will keep on pounding like a race horse when I am alone and no matter how hard I try I cannot distract the feeling. When I watch a tv show or play games the feeling stays and distracts me from whatever I am doing. When I finally fall asleep at 3AM I always end up waking up at around 7:30AM~ with strong thoughts on her and my heart pounding really fast again. When I go out and eat with my friends, a regular sized pho is usually an easy finish for me but lately I am struggling to eat even half of it. I lost all my appetite. \n\nI am trying really hard to get over this but it is so hard for me at night and in the morning, is there anything I could do to stop these feelings from getting to me? I have a counselor appointment booked for this weekend but for now I am really trying to get recommendations from all you experienced and amazing people to help me not get those pounding feelings anymore and to be able to eat.\n\nThank you so much for all the responses from my ex post, it really helped me make up my mind and I cannot thank you all enough for helping me through my toughest times.", "summary": "gf broke up with me and is meeting new guys, my heart pounds like crazy at night and in the morning, I can't sleep and I wake up super early and I cannot eat either."}
{"id": "t3_nasdv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I have become physically unable to have sex with anyone but my long time (uncommitted)lover.", "post": "I am a 21 year old male and the female involved is also 21. We have known each other since about the age of five. She was the first girl I ever had a crush on, it is a very early memory but I remember it well.\n\nShe moved away when we were still both very young and I didn't see her until we were about sixteen years old. For the past five years we have been having sex regularly, and to be completely honest, it is the best I've ever had. We have never been \"committed\" to each other and have never had anything resembling a normal relationship.\n\nIt is essentially \"fuck buddies\" but I have always felt an extremely deep emotional attachment. I feel this awesome feeling of understanding and this giving vibe from her. There has been times where were are separated by great distances, yet we both always end up with each other again.\n\nDown to the problem: we are both sluts. We have always slept with other people, and dated other people and our relationship is essentially short and very intense \"flings\" several times a year. Recently though, I have essentially become impotent. I physically can't have sex with anyone but her. I have been in many extremely embarrassing situations where I'll take a girl home and no matter how attracted and turned on I am by the girl I can't get an erection. My body only seems to want to have sex with one woman, no matter what my brain wants...\n\nWe have never spoken of our relationship being any more than what it is, though now I want to be the only one. I have absolutely no idea how I could ever approach her with this request and if she says no I don't know if I can continue this...\n\nAnd if she declines... how do I get over this mental barrier I seem to have developed?", "summary": "Long time lover, never had a committed relationship. I have become physically unable to have sex with anyone but her... how do I A) become the only one AND/OR B) Get over my inability to sleep with other women?"}
{"id": "t3_cj738", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How would I know if I was a sociopath?", "post": "I can provide more details if they're asked for, but I've been obsessing about symptoms so I'm not sure if I'm just over-analyzing things.\n\nI've always been disconnected with my emotions, and I don't remember really feeling true sadness for someone else beyond a very fleeting moment of it. \n\nI've been accused of using people more times than I like to admit, and while I was in denial about it, I can't deny it anymore. \n\nI don't seem to make long terms friends even when I try to do so, and my friendships tend to be only with people of the opposite gender I'm attracted to, because those tend to be the only people I can show an effort in talking to. \n\nI keep people away from knowing details about my life as much as possible, especially if it compromises the image I'm trying to project with that person. \n\nI'm really hoping I'm not a sociopath, because as I understand it, that would make having empathy for others impossible.", "summary": "How would I know if I was a sociopath, and if I'm not, how can I gain more empathy for others?"}
{"id": "t3_3zdkcd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my best friend [21 F], not replying to Facebook messages, despite having \"seen\" them?", "post": "I should probably state that my best friend is also my ex. We were incredibly close during our year and a half together, and had a mutual breakup because we wanted to see new people/ I graduated college and got a full-time job about an hour away. Our breakup was mutual, and after a couple of months of no-contact, we recently rebuilt our friendship. I think of her as my closest friend, and actually, just a couple of days ago, she openly admitted the same about me.\n\nDue to the distance, our only means of contact is through Facebook messenger. Since we started talking again though, I'd find that she'd frequently not respond to my last message, despite Facebook saying that she \"saw\" it. Sometimes we'd be having a fairly in-depth conversation (that she sometimes brings up), or she'd be ranting to me about something, when all of a sudden, her messages just stop. I realize that there are probably a number of reasons why she may not be replying; she's a lot more social than I am and often talks to multiple people at once, not all of my messages warrant a response, or that she's just busy, but it's still fairly annoying to see, especially since I'm the sort of individual that tries to send some sort of acknowledgement to all messages that I receive, or tell them if I can't talk at the moment. Because she doesn't always do this, I initially interpreted that she was sending me mixed messages shortly after we resumed contact.\n\nI realize that yes, we're no longer in a relationship, and that I can't expect her to always be there, but I feel as if this issue also extends to courtesy, and I really would like to talk to her about this without trying to sound needy/ pushy (especially given our former status). Maybe it would be best to just accept that this is how she is? All advice is appreciated.", "summary": "best friend that's also my ex doesn't always respond to messages even after seeing them, frustrating me, not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_in150", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I guess I just don't get it -- What's the benefit of Verizon's new Tiered Plans?", "post": "Frankly, I'm really hoping some Verizon person (preferably one who doesn't like their company very much) reads this and chimes in, but here goes:\n\nSome hijinks occurred, and I feel I recently got screwed by Verizon -- regardless of what their people tell me they can and cannot do, I think that there's some bullshit going on in terms of assigning contracts to lines. I hate being told that \"we just can't do that\" when SOMEONE had to design the bloody system. Also: I'm tied in a 1 1/2 year contract (I think) more or less.\n\nThat's not my real point though; end of story is I've gone from having unlimited (5GB cap, realistically), to having a hellova bout of crappy luck I guess, and now have no data.\n\nFor those who don't know, Verizon's tiers (per month) are:\n\n* Pay as you go, 1MB - $1.99*\n* 75MB - $10*\n* 2GB - $30\n* 5GB - $50\n* 10GB - $80\n\n*Not smart-phone eligible (\"feature-phone\" only).\n\n---------\n\nSo let me get this straight: Verizon has \"a lot of usage on their towers\" (and more so now that they have 4G and the iPhone); but rather than upgrading their infrastructure, they're reducing what the customer gets. Fine, you can argue that back and forth.\n\nWhat I don't get is how this (and this is the argument that a Verizon rep straight up told me) is *better* for a consumer. They said \"Well, your average person doesn't use 5GB, they don't even use 2GB\" (and I have friends who have said something similar). That's fine in theory, to me that means LOWER THE PRICE FOR 2GB SO THE CUSTOMERS GET MORE FOR THEIR MONEY. Oh, you have 75MB for $10? Aside from that (and the pay-as-you-go) being LAUGHABLE prices for bandwidth, you CAN'T PUT A SMARTPHONE ON THEM?!", "summary": "Majority of our customers (and lets face it, we're focused entirely on smartphones) don't use 2GB of data, so we'll make a tier targeting that concept, but make it so they can't use it.\" "}
{"id": "t3_1bxtqh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Another woman (24) is calling my boyfriend (26m) \"Sweetie, Darl and other Pet Names\" I (21f) Feel this is inappropriate due to their past history.", "post": "Hello all, \n\nBackstory - My bf (26m) and I (21f) have been dating for close to a year. During this time he admitted he had feelings for this chick (24f) that were inappropriate for while he was with me so voluntarily he ceased all contact with her. (Around October Last Year). \n\nThey started talking after a month (Only once a week or so and nothing bad - I have access to his phone etc - He let me do this). He has reconfirmed that he no longer has feelings for her and I trust him on this however am still rather wary in regards to her. \n\nI have noticed in recent texts she has been calling him \"Sweetie or Darl and has been saying things like \"I miss our lunch dates etc\". \n\nHe does not return the endearments to her in text but did say I miss them too. A group of friends, my bf and this girl are all going on a holiday next week and I'm cautious as this is what prompted him to tell me about the crush last year. \n\nIs it appropriate for her to be calling him these pet names and how do I communicate this to my SO? \n\nThanks Reddit!", "summary": "A previous crush of my bf(26m) Won't stop calling him sweetie and pet names. I (21f) Feel this is inappropriate due to their past history."}
{"id": "t3_1m35xb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Should reparations be given in the United States?", "post": "The southern argument was that since each State (or the people thereof) had voluntarily ratified the Constitution, they could also voluntarily UN-ratify it -- which is what the secession ordinance did. \n\nAbraham Lincoln's argument (and by extension that of the North) was that the Union was intended by the Founders to be permanent.\n\nEach of these arguments is consistent and plausible. What determined the matter was the war. Lacking any precedent, if South Carolina made secession stick, then it was legal; if she lost her bid to secede by being defeated in war, they secession was not legal. Since the South lost, secession is not legal", "summary": "If the Confederacy had the right to secede should reparations be given to the states that were invaded by the United States?"}
{"id": "t3_dghkw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my shit is not together. Any personal advice, experiences, thoughts? Rude jokes at my expense are welcome too!", "post": "Long time Redditor here. This is a throwaway, but I'm sure some friends will recognize me. I don't mind though.\n\nI'm 20 years old. I got kicked out of my parents' house recently, with absolutely no money to my name. All I have is this laptop, some clothes, and good friends. I'm staying with a friend for the time being, but I don't want to impede his family for longer than two months. However at the rate of my job search, I may have to stay for longer.\n\nDon't get me wrong, I'm not complaining about getting kicked out really. I wouldn't want to go back to my parents' house at this point. I will have to rise up and make a man of myself at some point in my life... but it just feels like I'm facing tremendous odds. I've applied at almost everywhere possible within a 3 mile radius (Outskirts of NYC), most places aren't hiring at this time (even McDonald's hasn't called me back yet). I'm not the kind of person to be above a minimum wage job (or two even!), but even those aren't hiring at this time.\n\nI managed to get sick right after I got kicked out, so I didn't do stunningly at my first interview. I'm also lacking in the official documents department. All I have is my birth certificate and high school diploma (my mother lost my social security card a while back so uh...).", "summary": "Got kicked out, no money, want to be self-sufficient as soon as possible. What would you do in my situation? Or what have you done in a similar situation? "}
{"id": "t3_3e7w0z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (23M) and my ex (25f). Recently had a mutual breakup, felt like I should have spent one last day with her.", "post": "So last Saturday, my ex and I decided to part ways.  We both decided that we were too different on important topics and that too much work would be required to make this relationship work on both of our parts.  Point is, we both knew this was coming.  But it was still the hardest choice I've had to make in a long time.  It was so hard to say bye to someone i was super close to and cared deeply for, even though i knew it was for the best.  \n\nShe came over on Saturday, we talked for 40 minutes, then started packing up all of her stuff at my house.  I was fine up until this point but we gave us each just one final hug for like 10 minutes and both of us just started bawling and kept hugging.  Towards the end she said I'm gonna miss you and gawd dangit that hit me like a ton of bricks.  But anyway we finally said bye about 10 minutes later and that was it.  Been silence on the radio since then.\n\nAs I think about it now, I still stand by my devision that it was for the best.  But I'm thinking back now that maybe I should have spent the rest of that Saturday with her before calling it quits, because just having it end so suddenly felt wierd.  Now when I say this, I don't mean spend the rest of Saturday making out/doing other physical activites.  I mean spend the day with her like you would for a friend who has one week to live.  \n\nThis thought had popped into my head yesterday and since then I haven't been able to get rid of it, like it's a regret, since I don't know if we'll ever talk again.  There's also a few more things I'd like to say to her along the lines of thanks for everything.", "summary": "exgf and I mutually broke up last saturday.  Felt like I should have spent the rest of Saturday with her before calling it quits and going no contact."}
{"id": "t3_i9rc8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I Have Feelings For a Coworker with a Boyfriend", "post": "I'm an introvert guy and usually I'm happy alone but for the past few weeks, I've been very lonely. I don't have any close friends so I don't have anyone to talk to most of the time. Last 3 or so weeks, a coworker of mine asked me to hang out with her after work and I went with her. I think she's also a bit lonely since she's new to the city and doesn't have friends yet. Her boyfriend is temporarily in another city for a contract job. Our cubicles at work are pretty much beside each other so we see each other a lot during the day.\n\nI found that I enjoyed talking to her and she said that she enjoyed hanging out with me as well. So, we've been hanging out a lot after work since then. We would go take a walk in the park, watch a movie, etc and we talk about pretty much anything. She talks about her boyfriend a lot too and I'm genuinely interested in hearing about it --their story, triumphs, and problems as well.\n\nI was happy about all this until lately I've started having feelings for her. What kind of feelings? I'm starting to really really like her and I even get sad and a bit jealous when she hangs out with someone else a lot. There, I realized I am totally fucked. I want her to just be a friend, nothing more, out of respect to her man as well.\n\nWhat the hell do I do now? My mind is just flat: \"No, this is stupid, nothing will ever happen to us, not in a million years, not fucking ever.\" But my emotions can't be controlled.. I don't know how to deal with this. Will I kiss her if she offers right now? Absolutely not. But I think about her a lot when I'm not at work and it just saddens me. Can I get some advice?", "summary": "Have feelings for a coworker with a boyfriend, don't how to deal with these feelings because I just want to be friends with her."}
{"id": "t3_v4jr5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I feel like I'm not allowed to be this happy, and it's straining my relationship.", "post": "I had a very melancholic youth; I had teen parents who never married and separated when I was three. They moved to different towns and remarried. All four have been abusive throughout my life in different ways. I had to be the stable pillar for my two little sisters at my dad's and my little sister and brother at my mom's as I was traded between the two houses. Growing up, I was always miserable and lonely inside but never expressed it. I guess I didn't have it as bad as most, but it still hurt.\n\nWhen I went to college and finally got away, my life drastically improved in every way. I started my first major relationship with a wonderful girl (19M in a relationship with 19F for one year), her family loves me, I got my first job doing something I love, I do great in all my classes. I was finally happy, happier than I've ever been in my entire life. Everyone says I deserve it, and it's my reward for the awful childhood I survived. I can't express how happy I feel every day. \n\nExcept when I'm alone. When I'm alone, I have this awful, terrible dread come over me that I'm about to lose it all. I'm not allowed to be happy. Tomorrow, I'll die in a car crash. My girlfriend will be hurt. I'll lose my job. I'll fuck up my classes next semester. I feel like I'm waiting for it all to go away, any moment now. I struggle to remind myself that it's okay to live well, and all these things are unlikely. \n\nIt's starting to strain my relationship, as I feel like I'm becoming more clingy or watchful than I should be. I'm having a panic attack right now, because she dropped me off at my place and didn't text me that she got back safely like she usually does. She probably forgot is at home playing Fallout right now, but I can't help imagining the worst.\n\nI want this over. I want this done. How do I get over it and come to terms with my own happiness?", "summary": "I have a great job, a great girlfriend, I have a 3.9 GPA at a good university. When I'm alone, I tear myself apart over it."}
{"id": "t3_517c8e", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Needing help finding out what she thinks is the perfect ring", "post": "I (31m) am ready to go ring shopping for my girlfriend (27f). Problem is, I can't find out her ring size or which kinds of rings she prefers. Because I want to make this perfect, I've browsed every damn Facebook post, picture, and Instagram post that she has and can't find anything. Her number 1 friend hates me (for her own selfish reasons) so I can't ask her. \n\nI have enlisted the help of some of her other friends but they all haven't had that discussion, so here's where I need help, kind ladies and gentleman of Reddit. I need ideas on how can I have people pry for this information without it being obvious to her. I'm completely perplexed by how to do this. \n\nAnd FYI I try to find ways to pry information from her passively and she tells me that \"she isn't gonna spill that info, and that I gotta find ways to figure it out\" and she thinks that I definitely should work for it and I'm 100% ok with that.", "summary": "Needing help and ideas on how myself and her friends can pry engagement ring size and preferences from my future fianc\u00e9e / wife."}
{"id": "t3_27441e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25 M] girlfriend [24 F] of 3 months has been on birth control since before we were dating (pill), but still makes me use condoms. Is it selfish of me to want to stop using them?", "post": "I've been dating this girl for 3 months, things have been going really well, we really like each other, I truly feel like we love each other, even though it hasn't been that long. \n\nShe has been on birth control for quite some time, but she still makes me use condoms. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I get that birth control pills have a certain failure rate. It's just that that recent ask reddit thread about what women want guys to stop doing, one of them was bugging them to take birth control so that they can come inside. My girl IS on birth control, but we still don't do that. Is that normal? \n\nI think it would be nice if we could stop worrying about condoms and all the fuss they entail. We are already committed and faithful to each other. She doesn't make me do it for STI concerns, as we are both tested and clean, and anyway, we start without condoms, and usually about half way through we put the condom on. She has admitted to me that it doesn't feel as good after we start using one, and our pillow talk often comes to her wishing \"there was a condom without a condom\" meaning she wishes there were a birth control method as trustworthy as a condom without using a condom. When I point out that the pill is actually more effective than the condom, she says the pill is only for a fail safe in case the condom fails, and she doesn't want that to be our only method. \n\nMy question is, is she being overly paranoid? Or am I being selfish wishing we could do away with the condoms? I just need someone to offer a little perspective, please.", "summary": "My girlfriend, who is on birth control, wants to keep using condoms, and I wish we could stop. Is that selfish of me?"}
{"id": "t3_co8mu", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Meeting Girls?", "post": "So, I have a problem. And it's terribly embarrassing to me. I haven't been laid in a year and a half, and I haven't been in a relationship for nearly three. I'm going nuts. I live in the Pacific Northwest in a city full of young attractive women and I can't seem to meet any single ones.\n\nI'm a reasonably good looking guy, not particularly confident, but good at faking it, and I don't choke up talking to girls (any more). I'm not shy around people and I can appear gregarious when motivated properly (read: by booze). I haven't really had this problem before. I just don't know where to go to meet single girls. All my friends are in relationships. Their friends are in relationships. THEIR friends are in relationships.\n\nI've joined OkCupid. No dice. Not a peep from any of the 50+ girls I've contacted. I go to bars, but the women travel in packs or with their SO's. What am I doing wrong? Do I need a wingman? I do a fair number of activities, when not working. Quiz night, hiking, social events, frisbee golf.  I'm just at a loss.", "summary": "Adequately attractive and interesting early 20's male is distressed by the statistical unlikelihood of his dry spell. Seeks help/reassurance."}
{"id": "t3_1ni9v1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my best friend [18 F], both gone off to uni and have started to have feelings for each other.", "post": "Me and a really good friend have both gone to uni and we have  both realised how much we actually liked the other. Now it's too complicated to organise anything since we live 4 1/2 hours away by train with a cost of around \u00a3100. We have always had this 'thing' between us, but I never thought it was anything more than that until we parted - now it's too late. I could really use some advice on what I could do to get over her or meet her, I just don't know what to do. She says we should start seeing other people rather than waiting for 3-4 years, but the thought of her being with someone else kills me and I, for sure, can't see myself with a different person.", "summary": "Me and my best friend had several 'flings' in college and now we're in uni and separated by a whole country, I want to be with her."}
{"id": "t3_4p1boe", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How can I (22M) get over the fact that my gf (23F) cheated on me a couple of years ago?", "post": "Honestly this is a very awkward situation for me since I've always been a person that said he'd leave the moment he found out he's been cheated on. Couple years ago I got cheated on but for the first time ever I decided to give my gf another chance and I have stayed with her since then. For the most part I've been happy since then but my main problem is that deep down I'm unfortunately still enraged and paranoid about what happened in the back of my head. I thought I'd feel more mature for actually giving her another chance but I've honestly just feel like a shameful pathetic idiot for taking that choice. Unfortunately I just have always had issues with letting my anger die out.", "summary": "She cheated on me years ago. I still have negative feelings about it, how can I finally put this 100% behind me??"}
{"id": "t3_s1izg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What ways have you seen people allow a friend or loved one to publicly humiliate themself?  I know a former-model-turned-paraplegic-pillhead-uberchristian who...", "post": "I know a former-model-turned-paraplegic-pillhead-uberchristian who regularly updates her facebook status to something like \"Jesus visited me last night and he told me I will walk again in 23 days.  Can you believe it?  In 23 days I will be healed, everybody! Who's ready to go dancing?\" It's pretty sad/pathetic, but what's worse is that when she's at a bar after she gets nice and drunk, she will start asking guys to let her give them blow jobs, but that usually doesn't work so it turns to begging and finally crying.  It's like clockwork, and that clockwork has turned her into a joke.  It's a small town, and people know her as 'the crippled blow job girl.'  If you see her at the bar, you know it's coming.  I'm not really friends with her; I just know her through the bar(yes, I was one of those guys she begged), but I've seen it happen over and over again.  The thing is she's always with the same people, so they have to know what's going to happen too, but no one seems to want to tell her that she's embarrassing herself, and they just turn their heads and let her do it.  Sometimes people even encourage this behavior, particularly with letting her believe she's going to be healed by a miracle.  It's bothered me for a while.  I figured someone else has to have witnessed a similar story.", "summary": "a crippled bitch regularly announces jesus will heal her within the month. she also begs for sex at bars while crying. her friends/family don't seem to see a problem with this "}
{"id": "t3_rbz4x", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "What can I do legally to restore water to my condominium!?", "post": "Hi, I live in SE Michigan in a condominium complex. Our water was shut off due to non-payment. (we recieved no notice) and we had to pay all that was due ($1500) We payed this yesterday at 2, they said the water would be turned on immediately. It wasn't. It's now the next day. The lady in our assosciation keeps insisting that the water meter is in another condo. Which we can't access because the person living there is never there (it's being rented) Now we're stuck with no water, no shower, no teeth brushing, no toilets, and no food for certain meals....\n\nPlease help us... What can we do? We called the police and they say that we can file a civil report for the lady not doing her job...", "summary": "Water is shut off in our condo, we pay money, we don't get water back due to meter being in another persons house"}
{"id": "t3_555bew", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] needs advice, badly for [F]", "post": "So, school started a few months ago in late July. Fresh out of sophomore year, ready to kick off junior year. Everything's the same, except for this one girl who the moment I saw her I was... erm... in awe? Don't know what term to use... \n\nI've talked to her about mundane topics, such as school. Asking about work and stuff. She doesn't have many friends, as she is new. I've been really nervous to legitimately start a conversation and ask for her number, snapchat, etc... because I fear about rejection and how I look. I honestly don't think I'm that good looking, but so does everyone else I guess. I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder (diagnosed, I take medicine) and it's really hard on me when it comes to girls.\n\nI really like her, and what I'm basically saying is how do I approach her and ask for her number without coming off weird? She seems a little intimidating but that's probably because I'm crushing hard over her.", "summary": "crushing over a girl and I fear of rejection and fear I'm just not good looking and I want her number to talk to her more."}
{"id": "t3_e4moy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Hey r/relationship_advice - first post here, first use of a throwaway account...I've got an awkward situation on my hands, and need your advice!", "post": "Hey Relationship_Advice,\n\nSo here's the predicament: I've recently been seeing this amazing girl - smart, great body, emotionally stable - she has it all. It's amazing! \n\nWe've been dating for a while now, and we've finally progressed into the bedroom phase of the relationship. Here's where it gets...awkward.\n\nOne of the first few times we had sex, I was behind her, and I noticed a small bit of, well, crap, still hanging out on her butt. Now, I'm no prude, and we were in the middle of sex, so I honestly didn't care. \n\nFast forward a week or two - we're going at it again, and as soon as I take off her pants, I *smell* something...but it's the heat of the moment, and so we just go at it, as it were. I won't get into details, but suffice to say she's a squirter, and did her thing. We did it in missionary that night, and it wasn't until the next morning that I noticed a *skid mark* down the middle of my white sheets. D: Ohhhh no.\n\nFast forward, another few days: Sex again, now I'm worried, I can smell poop, and lo and behold, the next morning, I actually find *crusted shit* on my comforter. :( :(\n\nr/relationship_advice, what do I do? I absolutely adore this girl - her looks, her brain, her calm and cool collected demeanor. What a step up from my ex! BUT - this whole 'my ass isn't clean' thing is **really** getting to me, and I need to know how to break it to her as politely as possible. I'm stuck, and I need your advice!", "summary": "New girlfriend doesn't wipe/clean her ass as well as she should, and is oblivious to it. White sheets/comforter post-sex are now proof :( How do I tell her?"}
{"id": "t3_4cyij0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [33 M] with my wife [32 F] 11 years, I'm falling for my coworker [32 F]. [UPDATE]", "post": "Original post.\n\nAbout 3 day's after my post I read all the comments and realized everyone was right. And I want to be 100% faithful to my wife and this woman is NOT worth losing my family.\n\nSome posters said something may be missing from my marriage. and I thought about it and realized me and my wife don't spend that much time together.\n\nSo I talked to my wife about it I told her how I felt and what was on my mind and we had a heart to heart. We cried a little and I don't want to lose her we made a schedule and are going to work out date nights for us to spend more time together.\n\nAs for Talia.\n\nMe and her met up and I told her the honest truth I'm married and I don't want to do something I'll regret forever. I told her my feelings were getting a little to inappropriate and that maybe we should not talk outside of work.\n\nShe agreed and told me she started feeling the same and that we should limit contact. She said it's for the best and that I'm a good man because most men would have just let it continue but I didn't.\n\nSo we ended our friendship.\n\nIn the mean time I'm going to focus on my family and my wife and distract myself from thinking of Talia. Looking back it wouldn't have been worth it because my wife has been with me through everything.\n\nWhen I lost my job when my parents died when I needed surgery. She's had my children and sacrifices for them and takes care of them without asking for anything in return.\n\nAnd I'm happy with her and I couldn't replicate all those memories with any woman. She's the only one for me and I realized and appreciate all the things she does for me and our family.\n\nThat's the update and hopefully I'll never have to return to this sub-reddit again.", "summary": "got my head out of my ass and realized how important my wife and family are to me. I ended my friendship with Talia and am going to focus on my wife and family now."}
{"id": "t3_pmqhq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what area of your life have you romanticized?", "post": "This question was brought on by an old mix CD that I've been listening to recently that me ex-girlfriend burned for me a long time ago. First of all, I'm assuming (hoping?) that I'm not the only one who does this. But I think we all do have areas of our lives that we romanticize and feel very nostalgic about, where we only remember the good parts. So, what part of your past do you look at through rose-tinted lenses?\n\nFor me, it was 2005. In the beginning of that year, I had this one group of friends that I hung out with mostly. When drama started to ensue within the group, I started talking to this girl that I had a class with, but really didn't know that well. We kept on talking, and I started shifting from that old group of friends to a different group (which obviously included this girl).\n\nWe started dating about a month and a half after we started talking. I think the rush of hanging out with this girl, and these new people just seemed so foreign, but also fresh to me, that it was strangely exhilarating. She also was into a bit of the same music, but also a lot of different stuff than what I listened to at the time (a lot of stuff I wouldn't really even appreciate until long after). She also made me appreciate a lot of other things around me that I'd never really thought to appreciate before. I know it all seems very Manic Pixie Dream Girl-ish, but I'm pretty sure that's just because how it seems to me looking back on it now after romanticizing it.\n\nWe were together for three and a half years, and while I loved her all that time, I think I've looked at that first year, and that version of her, in a very golden perspective. Whenever I listen to certain movies I watched, or music I listened to because of her, it always brings back the rush of memories, and my nostalgic view of the time.", "summary": "I look back at the first year of my relationship with my first girlfriend super nostalgicly. What part of your life do you do that to?"}
{"id": "t3_4quwli", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [42 M] falling deeper in love with [41 F] 8 1/2 years apart, and she is not in my life anymore has anyone experienced this?", "post": "when I first met this woman we were teenagers, i fell madly in love with her, but was always too shy to ask her out.\n\nshe was on my mind, even when i was madly in love with my wife, I would think back to her and wonder what she was doing where she was, was she happy. and I knew no matter how much i loved my wife, for just for the chance to know her again; just know her, that was all, i would leave my wife.\n\njust feeling that way made me feel like a shity person, so i would only let myself think of her every 2-3 years, maybe 4 times while I was with my wife.\n\nTime went on, and i split up with my wife, and when I was just content, not having to get to know someone again, she walked into my life.\n\nI flipped out at how she could be back in my life, after all this time, i had to get her number and find out what she had been doing.\n\nWe started meeting every tuesday at lunch time, it was all i could think of threw the week, my brain went stupid and I couldn't concentrate on my studies, i was 33 mind you, not a teenager anymore.\n\nanyway we ended up dating for a while, and I know from my point of view I made so many mistakes, rather than be myself I was telling myself to do dumb things. just thing contrary to who i normally was and am.\n\nWhile we were together i could not understand what i was feeling, I had never felt anything remotely like it, and could not really believe what i was feeling either. \n\nI believe she is my soulmate because of events in my life, and since the day I left her, she has not truly left my heart, and I fall deeper in love with her.\n\nthere is a lot more to the story, as in some of the reasons why i believe she is my soulmate, and she has moved on to a new guy and is in a great place personally i hear. I just wanted to get some other perspectives.", "summary": "So it's been eight and a half years now, and i miss her more than ever, is anyone going thru a similar experience?"}
{"id": "t3_2xajsw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] am too easy and I don't like it.", "post": "I don't know what it is or why it happens, but if a girl shows me attention for like 2 days in a row then they can just basically have their way with me.\n\nWhen a girl has been talking to me for a couple of days in a row, I feel like they fancy me and we might get in a relationship soon. This is a massive problem for me cause I'm now afraid that when I find someone I won't actually like them, I'll just like the attention they're giving me. \n\nAlso I hate when this happens because I over think stuff WAY too much (e.g. I start thinking 3 or 4 months ahead) and it just messes with my life.\n\nDoes anyone have the same kinda thing? Or maybe some advice or something.\nThanks", "summary": "if a girl shows me a lot of attention then I think they fancy me and we could get together. This messes with my mind and I need help."}
{"id": "t3_r3abq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit, what are some of your crazy hostel stories?", "post": "This happened in the first night of a 3 day stay in a hostel in Florence. A friend and I stayed in an 8 person room. Our shared bunk was in an isolated corner of the room with an adjacent row of lockers in front. My friend had the top, I was on the bottom. I woke up around 5am to find a Brazilian guy wearing only his tighty-whities sitting at the end of my bed. Freaked out and groggy from sleep I asked him, \"Hello, what are you doing?\". He got up and walked towards me. Starting to get scared, I tried to distant myself from him by moving over in my bed. He thought I was making room for him and he crawled into my bed. He started to cuddle and kiss my neck. I thought about screaming rape and I knew the people in the room would help me and the guy would get into a shitload of trouble. Then I assessed the situation quickly and realised this guy was shitfaced drunk and had no idea what he was doing. I pushed him away and angrily whispered to him to fucking leave. He got irritated, rolled over and passed out. Me being a tiny 5'1\" female trying to kick and shove an average sized guy off my bed was impossible. No matter how hard I slapped and jabbed him, he didn't wake up. The bunk started to rock back and forth from the force of my pushing. My friend on the top bunk woke up and confusedly called my name. I'm pretty sure at this point the whole room was awake and thought we were doing the nasty. About an hour and a half passed and somehow I woke him up. He must have finally sensed my anger and he got up to leave in a bit of a huff. An hour later everyone else in the room checked out early. Later on just as my friend and I were leaving the room to go sight-seeing, I heard him wake up and I caught a glimpse of him embarrassingly peeking over the locker partition. I never saw him again.", "summary": "Hostel in Florence, woke up to find a half naked Brazilian guy trying to cuddle with me. Turns out he was extremely drunk. Lucky for him I was sympathetic and didn't cause a scene to have him arrested."}
{"id": "t3_1qlc7w", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's your best advice for my 4yr old nephew being teased at school for being a baby?", "post": "I have a 4 yr old nephew who is his own person.  He's not a fan of playing with most the boys at school cos the play bad guys, and run around with fake guns.  He'd rather hang with the teachers or girls, and play their games.  Needless to say, the biggest boy in class has started picking on him.  The boys birthday is coming up, and he told my nephew he'd get a baby piece of cake, cos he's a baby.  On my sisters advice, he told him that's not nice, and to stop.  My brother-in-law and myself say he should just ignore him.  But now my sis doesn't know rather to have him go to party or not.  My nephew wants to, as long as he gets a big kid slice of cake.  I adore my little nephew and this breaks my heart, fighting urge to fly 2000 miles a kick a 5yr old.  In lieu of that, what's the best advice I can give him?", "summary": "what's your best advice for a 4yr old being teased for being a baby at school?  Should he go to the kids birthday party or not?"}
{"id": "t3_1h2u6j", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Well....I just got dumped...I guess", "post": "Im 22 and shes 20. She hits me up online saying she's seen me at the bowling alley and was too shy to approach me. I find it flattering and she's pretty so we go out. We have a really good time. She's flirting a lot and were touching each other.\n\nI open up to her and tell her I've never kissed a girl and I'm a virgin. She finds it adorable and she flirts all night and makes me comfortable and then we kiss....several times. And again when I say goodbye. I was amazing. Never felt that happy before.\n\nI text her the next day saying I had a really good time. She says she did to and she asks me out for a second date. I text her the next few days trying to get the date going, but she appears busy and hard to meet with.\n\nFinally today she tells me she has been dealing with a lot of drama and personal stuff. Saying she doesnt know if she's looking for a relationship. Another guy she was involved with it in her head too.\n\nBasically I got dumped really early on, which I guess is better than later, but I really liked her and she really liked me. She made me develop a crush on her and now it's over and im sitting her alone.\n\nHow do I get out of this funk. She made me feel so good and not a lot of girls give me that feeling.", "summary": "girl asks me out first 2 dates, says she isnt looking for a relationship and now im out in the dust, depressed. Trying to put it behind me."}
{"id": "t3_3qhkti", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [36 M] with my wife[28 F] of a year and half, causing family issues, unhappy parents", "post": "First and foremost, I'm really just mentally exhausted. I am a good guy and sensitive. My wife cheated on me. And bad. I am giving her a another chance and she has been spectacular in doing the right thing and working to rebuild trust. Here comes a major problem though... \n\nWhen this all happened I reached out to my family for support and now they are less than thrilled with my decision to work on my relationship. My wife and I are separated, have been for 4 months, however continue to see each other and work towards reconciliation. We do not live together. It appears to me that my parents, and possibly brothers and sisters in law may not be able to forgive. \n\nI sent an email last night telling my family that I was working on things with my wife. The only response that I have received thus far is from my mother who has said that she \"will pray\" that \"God's plan for us will be accepted by all\". Also, she said that she is upset that maybe I \"disclosed a little too much\" when all of this went down and now its all coming back to bite me. \n\nI'm frustrated. I understand her point and I don't expect them all to forgive or forget today, tomorrow, or anytime soon. However, I feel like I am the black sheep. I feel as if I have done something wrong by taking my wife back and for giving another chance. I feel like I did something wrong for leaning on my family when times got tough. Isn't that what family is for??\n\nI have a very close family but today that email validated my long held feelings that I am THE fuck up. I married a woman who they hate. I have made horrible decisions myself in the past. I feel like my family looks down on me and today just strengthens that feeling. \n\nI feel angry almost because I have been victimized by my wife's actions but today I was essentially told that I almost did something wrong for leaning on my family. My mom told me that she hurts for me. That she hates to see her son in pain. I understand that... Do I have a chance of ever saving my relationship with my immediate family and my marriage or do I have to choose between them?", "summary": "Working on marriage with estranged wife/family is not happy... What can I do? What can my wife do to help the situation?"}
{"id": "t3_rxfpi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Manager is docking pay for talking. Legal?", "post": "I just had a work meeting last week at my fast-food job. Everything was going normal, until my boss mentioned a new rule that we'll be trying out. If he catches you talking, or slacking off, you get a tally mark, and for each tally mark at the end of the week, 5 minutes is deducted from your pay. I go to school full-time, so I only work part-time on the weekends. It shouldn't affect me because I'm hardly there, and when I am, I'm a hard-worker. The thing I'm worried about is that my boss is a dick and I feel like he might arbitrarily deduct from people he doesn't care for because it seems like a rule with a lot of grey area and no oversight for how the manager implements it. Is what he's doing even legal? And if it's not, what would be the appropriate course of action to take?", "summary": "For every time an employee is slacking off, manager will deduct 5 mins pay, but manager is a dick, so might deduct for fun. Legality?"}
{"id": "t3_371es5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] having troubles with my feelings for a girl [19 F] Even though I have a girlfriend [18 F]", "post": "So to set up the ground work me and 19F girl have known each other on a name basis for coming up to 2 years now seeming me and her are in the same college course. Now me and my girlfriend have been dating for 5 months now, everything great, she is fun and great. I'm enjoying the time together.\n\nNow this is where stuff happens, I've had feelings for 19 F for a while now. But never acted on them because she has a boyfriend and they've been dating close to a year now. Then I met my current girlfriend and started stepping away from 19 F, spending more times with my girlfriend. \nThen I noticed 19 F starting to get pokey and playful with me, starting to hug me and slap my butt, I instinctfully slap her butt back, which I feel terrible for because girlfriend. Then 19 F starts tackling me so I pin her which she smiles too. \n\nSo my question is even though I've wanted to do this sorta thing since I met her I think I should stop because relationships, or maybe I should confront her about this.. ideas?", "summary": "Girl I like even though I have a girlfriend, I've known her close to 2 years, she gets grabby with me when start showing girlfriend attention. Sexual tension ensues. Halp!"}
{"id": "t3_26bfcf", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Secured card to boost credit?", "post": "I'm contemplating applying for [this card] I'm trying to get my credit back on track after moving overseas (from the U.S.) and neglecting my finances back home for years. I already have a Capital One card that's unsecured and has a $2,500 limit. I'm charging Netflix to it to keep a balance ticking over, then have the bill paid automatically every month from checking.\n\nThis has been in operation for something like nine months. About three months ago, I decided to apply for another card I thought I'd qualify for, hoping to increase my overall limit. I was denied. Got an offer in the mail for another one just recently, applied for it and was rejected. Little do these banks know, I have many years of perfect payment history overseas.\n\nAnyhow, I have a fairly huge emergency fund and no debt. I think putting a $3,000 deposit down and getting this secured card may be a good move in my quest to improve my credit standing. As I understand it, the higher limit would reduce my utilization somewhat, but would also show that banks were willing to lend to me (even though they're actually not). One of the reasons cited for rejections has been a low number of open accounts.\n\nIs this smart? The deposit for this card would be placed in an interest-bearing account, according to the terms. There's a chance \u2013 it's not clear how big a chance \u2013\u00a0that I'd be converted to an unsecured account after a year or so. I hope at that point I'd be able to withdraw my money, although astonishingly the T&C don't address this at all. The only downside I can think of is a situation where I'm not able to convert it to an unsecured card in the future but I want/need the deposit. I'm also not clear on whether converting to unsecured would mean opening a new account and closing the original, which it seems would negatively affect average account age.", "summary": "Is it wise to put down a deposit on a secured card to rebuild credit when I can easily afford to and have no debt?"}
{"id": "t3_4hmtly", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26F] with my 35m boyfriend 3yr. police officer dating bartender", "post": "hi, reddit,\n\nI've come here to ask a few questions... And thank you all in advance for reading.\n\nI'm a police officer, my boyfriend is a bartender. We've been together for about 3 years. We've had a lot of ups and some downs. \nWhen we first met (before I was in LE) we would frequently hang out at bars together. Now, I work night shift and my patrol area is a large group of bars where I basically deal with drunks constantly throughout the night.\n\nMy boyfriend is a bartender in that bar area. Lately he's been going out and drinking (mostly beer I believe) until about 1am give or take in this bar district. He does this while I'm at work over night. He does this about 3-4 times a week. \n\nSometimes it hurts my feelings because I work so hard in that area to do my job... Getting cussed, thrown up on, working car accidents, DWIs ect. It hurts me to think about my boyfriend hanging out and drinking at these bars while I'm working my butt off overnight.  If it was occasionally, I wouldn't mind. But it's several nights a week. \n\nI know my job is dangerous and I picked my career so I should deal with it. I don't feel like I deserve any special treatment but it also hurts when he decides to stay out and drink instead of coming by the house to say goodbye or anything at all before I go to work. I'm not saying be there every single day but... Maybe shoot me a text or something atleast.  \n\nI feel bad for letting it bother me, and I don't want to feel this way. I also don't know who he's with or when he'll eventually go home so that adds to it.. He knows my feelings on the situation but I feel that he does what he wants sometimes and will just brush it off or just apologize for it later.\n\nI don't want to nag him, he's a grown ass man... But at the same time, I'm not sure if I could have a potential future with him considering my career. \n\nIs this normal for guys to do and am I just over reacting?", "summary": "I'm a police officer, boyfriend is bartender and frequently bar hops in my \"beat\" while I'm at work."}
{"id": "t3_riqn5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "SAP-ish Question: What to do after an abortive attempt at asking a girl to lunch?", "post": "I'm not a super SAP-type, but I'm very quiet and don't really try to pick up girls all that often. There's a girl who I'm on an informal friendly acquaintance with. I find her attractive and would like to get to know her and I've decided that whether she's flirting with me (e.g. playfully swatting my long hair when she walks past) or just naturally friendly, it'd be worth the mild embarrassment if I made an advance and got rejected.\n\nSo when I stopped at the cafe to get some joe before an exam and discovered she was working behind the counter, this exchange happened:\n\nHer: Hey, how are you doing?\n\nMe: Hey, how are YOU doing? [smooth, I know]\n\nHer: I'm at work, how do you think?\n\nMe: Well, when do you go on break?\n\nShe tells me and I leave with my purchase with the intention of coming back to ask her to lunch or something. That time rolls around and I show up to find the place absolutely slammed. Not wanting to look like a freak, I sit close to the door and start working on some light homework, occasionally looking up to see when she gets cut to go on lunch. Maybe ten minutes later, I look up and she's gone.\n\nMy question: how can I bring this up next week in class without seeming like a freak? Should I even say anything at all or just save myself the trouble?\n\nI feel like there's a small chance she didn't catch why I was asking when she went on break (maybe she thought it was idle chit-chat) or that she just plain didn't see me when she left. I want to express my interest to get to know her without creeping her out and the situation seems kind of delicate to me. \n\nWhat's the plan, then? (Assuming going to the Winchester is out of the question.)", "summary": "I hinted that I was going to ask a girl out and she seemed to have dodged me. She is either oblivious or not interested and unwilling to just tell me. How do I handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_4d3e1y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21M] boyfriend let me [23F] win at a arm wrestling contest, my friend [23F] how it's going to hurt my confidence", "post": "I have been seeing this guy Roman for 4 months now, he is really sweet. His nick name is \" The Gentle Hulk\" not a name he wanted but people labelled him as that \n\nHe is a big guy like 6'8 and is really into body building\n\nToday we were out with one of my friends at a coffee place , and I was talking to Roman about what movie we were going to go see tomorrow. I jokingly suggested a arm wrestle contest, he put his arm on the table and said \" square up\"\n\nHis arm dwarfed mine, it was like a stick compared to a log. He let me win and was like \" oh no you beat me\". He got up a little while later to go do something \n\nMy friend started telling me that, if he let's me win at thing's like that it will hurt my confidence. She was telling me it was really rude how he let me win and she should not treat me as \"weak\". \n\nI have never dated a guy before, but is she telling the truth when she says these things?", "summary": "My boyfriend let me win at a arm wrestling contest, and my friend started telling me that if he continues to let me win / treat me as weak it will hurt my confidence."}
{"id": "t3_3o3vkn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23 M] ex girlfriend [23F] is upset with me because I have become friends with one of her friends[24F].", "post": "So my ex and I dated for over 4 years and broke up about 3 months ago, we said we would stay friends. We work at the same place and have contact with a lot of the same people so I feel like it's impossible that our lives will ever be separate unless one of us finds a new place to work. For awhile I was a bit depressed and she came out as a lesbian about a month after the break up and is dating somebody that we both know and are friendly with. Of course I was a little upset about it, but I wasn't about to tell her that since she already has a bit of an issue with depression, and coming out to her parents has already caused a lot of problems so I didn't want her to feel any worse than she already did. So I just sucked it up and have been as supportive as possible to her through out this and I'm still friendly with her current girlfriend. 4 or 5 weeks ago, her friend and I started hanging out, going to bars, just hanging out together with no motive of hooking up or dating or anything, we are just friends. Recently, my ex comes to me and says that I've crossed a boundary by hanging out with one of her friends, not just because we're hanging out but I guess how close we've become in the 4 or 5 weeks. She feels like this is heading towards us hooking up. While I understand that the concern is warranted, I have tried to reassure her that will never happen and I wouldn't do that to her. I am also annoyed by this situation because I feel like the boundary was already crossed 2 months ago when she decided to date somebody that we're both friendly with from work. I wanted to point this out to her but she already isn't in the best state of mind so I didn't want to make her feel bad about that. Can anybody give me a little insight from an outside perspective? I feel like I'm thinking rationally but I'm way too close to this whole thing to know for sure.", "summary": "Ex started dating somebody we both know from work, I became friends with my ex's friend, now she's upset that her friend and I have become kind of close."}
{"id": "t3_14m2fp", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I didn't care that much that she was logging into my e-mail without permission.", "post": "I don't have anything to hide. Maybe it's a little embarrassing when I flip out and pathetically try to reconnect with old flames, but I think I'm entitled to that.\n\nBut it's worse now. After I stopped talking to her completely, there wasn't anything left to show me she gave a shit at all. But then there it was - she looked at my e-mail behind my back! She still did care!\n\nI knew I couldn't talk to her - we are both too stubborn for that - so I archived everything and left a lone note to myself. And of course for anyone else who might happened to take a look.\n\nBut it wasn't nice, or sweet, or forgiving. It was nasty. I told her to fuck off and called her mean names. And she hasn't looked back since.\n\nMaybe that was it. The last connection we'll ever have. Just her sneaking a peak at my email without permission. But I have the feeling there is one tightly-would clandestine sinew holding something about us together, ready for one final for-better-or-for-worse snap back.", "summary": "Stopped communicating with my ex-girlfriend, but caught her looking at my email account a few weeks later. I left her a message in my own email telling her to fuck off, and she hasn't logged in since."}
{"id": "t3_3gdoup", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23m] am in my first relationship with an older Girlfriend [26] and we have different plans\\views for the future.", "post": "Hey there, so what triggered this post is my girlfriend showing me a list of potential baby names yesterday. I felt very uncomfortable because  \n\na) I feel waaaay not ready to think about children  \nb) I don't think I actually ever want to have my own children.\n\nSo this lead to me staying up late feeling very weird and rethinking alot about our relationship. Being in a relationship with an older women is weird in a lot of ways. She already has a job, while I'm still in University and sometimes it feels like she lives 5 years in the future, while I can't let go of my teenager years. I'm not a theist, while she is catholic and themes like Marriage, children and our perception of the world etc. are not exactly on the same page, but we always said \"we can figure that out when it looks like we'll be together for a long time\" in the beginning. But now it actually looks like it, and I don't feel ready at all.\n\nOur parents are starting to pressure and this is really bothering me too. I told her I'm not sure about children, but I think I know now, that I actually do not want them at all. I do not want to talk about the reasons, please just believe me I thought it through.\nI just had to get this out of my system, because it's really hard on me, but I don't know if I should talk to her about it right now.\nWhat do you think?", "summary": "My girlffriend showed me a list of babany names, I don't feel ready to tell her I don't want children."}
{"id": "t3_2928hn", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by brushing my teeth.", "post": "Last week I got my wisdom teeth out, however this has caused some problems over the last few days by way of food apparently getting stuck in one socket. This caused great pain and inflammation.\n\nI went back to the dentist today and after cleaning out the socket and packing it full of oil clove (which I have not had a good reaction to), I went on my way.\n\nWell, tonight when I got home I took some pretty strong painkillers and thought I would just go to bed to sleep away the horrible day I had been having. It turns out if you are quite tired/ drugged up you don't pay attention to what you put on your toothbrush.\n\nThis is where the fun begins.\nI commenced my tooth-brushing by way of turning on my electric toothbrush when I noted a down right awful taste (not the oil clove). It was soap, I had put hand soap on my toothbrush. Queue power chucking all over the bench as the soap mixed with the horrid stuff in my tooth socket. This was so powerful I then got a blood nose aaaannnnndddd then I fainted. \nSo there I was, oil clove, soap, blood, vomit and a teeny hint of leftover toothpaste all mixing in my mouth.\n\nI begrudgingly cleaned the bench then sobbed on the floor for about 10 minutes and then went straight to bed where I am now laying while still tasting faint aromas of everything. Today has not been my day.\n\nI think I will buy a new toothbrush.", "summary": "Brushed my teeth with soap, mixed with oil clove from dentist. Pain, vomit, crying, blood and a little bit of lost dignity."}
{"id": "t3_1hlfzv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[30M] have been dating an amazing [30F] for 6 weeks. Everything was going great but then...", "post": "Dear reddit,\n\nI like this girl a lot! She is smart, honest, beautiful. Our relationship was going so well on multiple levels and we both openly discussed possibility to take it one step further. Both of us are 30 and we have very successful careers. For the first time in my life I started feeling like she could be the one. It was wonderful! But then she told me the painful truth...\n\nShe used to date her boss for couple of months and they eventually broke up to avoid harming the company. I think he is the one who didn't want to make their relationship public and that triggered the breakup. Since they broke up, they've been working closely together, they hangout frequently as friends and sometime go on business trips together.\n\nI am generally not a jealous guy, and I feel like I could live comfortably with something like that but it turns out that her affection for him is still there. He is a good looking guy with a great sense of humor and they actually seem to get along pretty well. On the other hand, she obviously likes me a lot and wants to be with me. So what is my problem then?\n\nWhen I told her I feel a little uncomfortable with the fact that their romantic relationship has not completely ended and that I worry that at some point they might hook up again... she did not deny it. She even confirmed that there is a very small chance that might happen in the future.\n\nToday I feel more depressed and miserable than I felt in a very long time (I am generally a happy guy). I am in a complex conflict with my emotions and reason. I know I like her even more because of her openness and honesty but I know this situation will make me very insecure or even jealous in the future and that is something I don't need in my life. I feel like I should break up and at the same time I am afraid that I am letting something really wonderful slip out of my hands.\n\nPlease advise,", "summary": "I met the most amazing girl and our relationship was wonderful. Then she told me there is a very small chance she might hook up with her ex again (who is also her boss)"}
{"id": "t3_2p6yyo", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(M 26)y girlfriend(F) 24 is bi and kissed another girl last night. I'm really upset.", "post": "Last night my girlfriend and her coworkers went out drinking and I  was invited. She went into the restroom to talk to one of the girls she works with and that girl started trying to make out with her. My gf got upset came out and told me.and I said it was fine. The same coworker from before drank herself sick and my gf went to check on her without telling me what was up and was in the bathroom with her for a half hour. I became more and more upset as I realized they were together in the bathroom. My gf came out and explained that her coworker threw up some and then tried to make out with her again. I'm mad that my girlfriend voluntarily entered into a situation where she would be alone with someone who was trying to hook up with her. When I talked to her about it later that night she had a massive crying fit so I had to pretend everything was fine. My girlfriend is bi and has done stuff with other girls. I'm mad what do I do? I went into work just to avoid her for a while today.", "summary": "girlfriend is bi and put herself in a situation where she was alone with another female who wanted to hook up with her. I'm upset."}
{"id": "t3_20lgql", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What is the best way to handle our financial differences in our relationship without causing a problem?", "post": "My boyfriend (29/m) and I (29/f) have been together for a year and we live together. We recently had our first argument about our money differences. I am the type that saves money and feel uncomfortable unless I have a decent cushion in my savings account. I rarely buy fun things for myself. My boyfriend is the type who rather spend his extra money and enjoy it. We both have known we have different spending habits since we've been together.\n\nHe has a lot of hobbies; playing guitar, drums, home brewing beer, motorcycle riding, etc. I don't really have any hobbies that require a lot of money to buy those types of things. We want to learn from each other. I need to be a bit more loose with my money and he would also like to try to save more.\n\nMy saving has allowed me to have a good credit score. So I am able to open accounts (ie a new cell phone account, get a loan for a motorcycle). My boyfriend is not able to do these things because of owing money on old accounts or a bad credit score.\n\nIt caused the first financial argument this weekend when he needed to use my bank account for his insurance to be pulled and his paychecks to be direct deposited into my account, as he doesn't have a bank account. I was worried he might overdraft, because the account is in my name. I wasn't very tactful about mentioning this fact. I was condescending , I said \"You can't be using the account for everything because you might cause overdraft fees.\" He was offended that I implied he would do this. He has been using this account for awhile and  I have actually had to transfer money to avoid him over-drafting twice, but I never actually told him this when it actually happened. I brought it up during our argument last night, which isn't fair. I didn't feel like he understood where I was coming from in bringing it up\n\nWe know that money and finances can be a major component of relationships ending. So my question is, what is the best way that we can handle our differences without causing a problem in our relationship?", "summary": "Boyfriend and I got in an argument about our differences in money management and do not want the way we approach this topic to cause a problem in our relationship. What is your advice?"}
{"id": "t3_137228", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is a good toy to keep a dog happy & quiet?", "post": "As a cat person, I do not know much about dogs. Everyday when my neighbors leave for work, they leave their dog outside with food and water and some rope toy. The issue is that my Dad works from home, and the dog barks and whines for the 8 hours his owners are gone, disrupting my Dad's phone conferences. We've nicely asked our neighbors to handle it twice now, and they haven't, so I need your help Reddit. What toy can I buy and throw over the fence for this poor puppy to make him quite and happy? I considered dog treats, but I don't know if he has any specific dietary needs. Thanks for the help!", "summary": "Neighbors dog barks for 8 hours a day disrupting phone conferences, what toy can I get to make him happy and keep him from barking?"}
{"id": "t3_l5c1b", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "I'm embarking on a journey of fate. Tips? (x-post from AskReddit)", "post": "I am a 23 year old who graduated from college in 2010 with no clue about what I wanted to do with my life and have yet to apply for a single job. After spending the last year burdened by family duties and slipping into a deep depression, I am in desperate need for an adventure. I am tired of sitting at home wallowing in depression and letting my family suck what little energy I have left in me. So I'm bustin outta this joint.\n\nI've decided to start in my hometown in California and attempt to hitchhike/CouchSurf/wwoof my way down to South America. I am not making any definite plans and I am open to going just about anywhere while loosely attempting to head south. I hope to CouchSurf as much as possible, but part of the adventure for me is to have the freedom and flexibility of no plans so that may be difficult since I will not have a schedule.\n\nMy original plan was to fly to somewhere in Central America and start from there, but I just can't afford the flight. Which brings up another issue: I am leaving with only hundreds of dollars to my name. My plan is to try to find a little work along the way to keep me going when I can't find a free ride, food or place to stay. Any tips on how to do something like that is appreciated. I would also really love to do some volunteer work along the way.\n\nI have never done anything like this so any tips are appreciated. And yes, I do know that it is a crazy idea but I will go mad if I spend another year at home in this useless fog. I plan to read as much as I can on the topic before I go and hopefully I will also find useful advice from Reddit!", "summary": "Fed up with my current life, hitchhiking South from California to South America going pretty much wherever fate takes me. Tips? Ideas? Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_4rlmdd", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Should I call back or wait?", "post": "Hi,\nI said I, but it's actually my roommates' situation and I want to help her.\n\nShe sent a resume online to a company. They called her and they arranged an interview. When she came back from the interview, she told me the boss told her she was very qualified  and professional so they were glad she applied. It wasn't actually an interview, they told her informations about the company and made her fill some papers. It was pretty much confirmed.\n\nBut they then scheduled a kind of trial or test the next week, they sent her documents on the company's specific methods. It included some examples from employees there, and these employees weren't that good. I also have a bit of knowledge in the area and they indeed weren't so good I could spot many mistakes.\n\nShe studied them and did the trial. She remembers doing two mistakes total during the whole test. She was really nervous even though she's among the best (this job doesn't require a degree, but both her parents got a degree in this area and work in it as well). They offered her part time so it was perfect.\n\nWe're now 2 weeks later and she didn't get any news. She doesn't even know if the boss looked at the reviews and video of her trial (he couldn't be there in person so his employees did that)\n\nThe boss had talked about her starting in October, at first she was supposed to do the test then too. But he decided otherwise because he could maybe fit a few hours during the summer for her.\n\nShe thinks the lack of call and E-mail means she didn't get the job, so she is looking for another job. I try to tell her he is probably busy, and I know a lot of people who only got called back after 1 month.\n\nStill, should she call them or wait? Is calling a bad behavior in a boss point of view?", "summary": "she pretty much got the job, is qualified, but they didn't contact her after a trial. Should she call or write them an e-mail?"}
{"id": "t3_27pb6u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19M]life long best friend [18F] is dating the biggest loser and it's beginning to rub off on her.", "post": "This year I began my freshman year of college and left my hometown for the first time. My best friend had to stay in town for her senior year of high school. When I left she was dating another one of my friends and things were really good for her. She was normal and I didn't have to worry so much of staying in touch while I was in school.\n\nTowards the last month of school I was beginning to get phone calls from mutual friends saying that she was talking to this absolute loser. He's a rude snotty brat that gets publicly intoxicated and starts fights very often. He steals a lot and was generally disliked by most of our high school. When I finally came home I talked to her about it and asked why she would want to talk to someone like this and she just loves how he showers her with attention. Now none of her friends get to see her because she spends all of her time with this kid. She steals a lot and drinks too excess. She's moving to the opposite side of the country in a few months and we're scared she's going to bring him with her.\n\nMe and her close group of friends don't know what to do. I'm scared that if I see this kid in public I might get into an altercation that would surely ruin my friendship. Should we sit her down and talk to her about? Should we let it ride out? What should I do?", "summary": "Best friend is dating a douche bag. It is starting to affect her and her friendships. Don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1dp3py", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "One of my (27f) best friends (27f) is hiding her friendship with my abusive ex (35m).", "post": "I had a bad breakup ~6 months ago with my ex, let's call him Bill, who was emotionally abusive and ended up cheating on me with one of my friends and getting her pregnant. After the breakup, he expected that I'd eventually come crawling back. It took a lot of work not to, but I cut the cord and haven't spoken to him in 5 months now, even when he was sending me death threats. Asshole. One of my best girlfriends, let's call her Alice, knows all about this and was there for me through it all. She would do what all good girlfriends do: take me out for lunch, coffee, come over, cry with me, etc. \n\nAbout three months ago, Alice went through a breakup of her own, and I was there for her every day. \n\nYesterday, I thought it OK to finally unblock my ex Bill on Facebook. Morbid curiosity, maybe? Most of his Facebook posts are private, but he has several photos that are public. Recent photos, some photos that were even taken at the same time that Alice and I were together hanging out. Anyway, it turns out that Alice is still friends with Bill on Facebook (not a big deal), and she has been commenting and liking all of this posts (big deal--wtf?).\n\nI'm 100% certain Alice isn't interested in Bill sexually, as she is dating someone new now and completely head over heels. Her new man is all she can talk about. So her actions with my ex on Facebook really don't compute. \n\nI realize that it's a touch childish to worry about things over Facebook, but this definitely rubs me the wrong way. I can't really think of a good way to confront her about it either, because I'm afraid she'll immediately go on the defensive. As it stands now, I'm just going to put her at arm's length. This really, really sucks.\n\nAny advice?", "summary": "My best girlfriend is still friends with my horrible ex and actively communicating with him on Facebook publicly...as if nothing were wrong."}
{"id": "t3_zikvi", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[18m] needing dating advice", "post": "I am [18m] in college. I have been out and partying a lot recently, and have met some nice freshman girls on my travels. One girl [18F] stands out above all of the rest. We have hung out a few times over a 2 week period, and each time makes me want her more. When I asked her about dating, she mentioned she isn't over her \"summer fling\" [20/M] from her hometown. I enjoy time with her over everyone else, but I still want to get out and \"explore\". Essentially, my question is Would I look like an ass for hooking up with other girls while liking her? Could she be testing me to see whether I stick around? What should I do?", "summary": "Nice [18F] has an \"fling\" that is keeping her from getting serious. Should I stick around?"}
{"id": "t3_2qll1l", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting turned on in a hotel room [NSFW]", "post": "Well I'm writing this from my phone bc I refuse to go back on my laptop out of embarrassment. Backstory: I'm on a trip with my parents and dog and to my disapproval, I have to share a room with them. Two beds, in an exceptionally small room but hey, there's a kitchen. In all fairness though, a room just for me or even for my dog too would be a lot of money, but I digress. This literally happened about 15 mins ago, when I was just browsing the front page. Now, I wanted to keep it clean bc I don't need to be a horned up 18 year old in the same room as his parents. But, gonewild got the better of me. After a few posts, shit, I started to feel some type of way so I decided to check out that site Reddit is advertising, Thumbzilla (not bad). I found a video and as things started to get heated in it, my hand slipped under the sheets and there was rubbin' galore. This went on for about 5-7 mins before I looked past my laptop screen and saw the glint of my mom's eyes staring me dead. In. The. Face. Instantly, I froze, pretended nothing happened, closed the laptop, and rolled over in the bed. Might as well have been my grave. She hasn't said anything to me and I doubt she will but I don't think she can unsee what she done seen.", "summary": "Got horny in a room with my parents, started to stroke the monkey, got caught by mom, awkward as hell."}
{"id": "t3_2q2rdv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26F] with my dude [29M] - he has abysmal self-esteem", "post": "I'm dating an amazing guy and I can see this relationship being long-term for sure. We love spending time together and crack each other up, we balance each other, the sex is bomb, etc.\n\nI am at a point in my life where I am extremely happy - with my body image, my job, my friends, just my life in general. He is not. He has a great job and is VERY successful financially, but doesn't like this city and struggles with feeling lonely. He's lived here for two years and hasn't tried much to branch out and meet people or explore the city. \n\nHe had his heart broken several years ago and I kind of think he's been moving around, switching jobs, running away from how hurt he was. He definitely hides behind how funny he is and I don't think he lets people see that there is more to him than that.\n\nWe had a heart to heart last night about all this and he seemed really touched that I cared and said no one had ever asked him these things before.\n\nSo, my question is, is it risky to date someone who isn't happy with himself as a person yet? Is it possible for him to \"catch up\" or am I setting myself up to be a crutch?", "summary": "I'm happy in my life, dating someone who isn't quite there. Is this okay or am I just going to be a crutch?"}
{"id": "t3_3tq9gg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28M] abused and ill-treated my girlfriend [28F] of one year on her birthday and I can't seem to forgive myself.", "post": "So here goes.\nIt was my girlfriend's birthday. I gave her a surprise visit at her house at 12 AM. Bought her a cake and a dress. The same night, took her to an exclusive restaurant for a nice romantic dinner. We both drank a lot, had an intimate romantic time. As we got done with dinner and were leaving the restaurant, we had an argument and I just lost it. I was driving, dropping her back home, and I shouted at her, calling her abuses, pushed her couple of times against the car door. She has some bruises from it. And then I threw her out of the car in the middle of road at 1 AM in the night. Although, just 3 minutes back I picked her back up.\n\nI just cant seem to live with this memory. Just cant seem to forgive myself. It kills me knowing how I was at my worst with a person who I love the most. I don't want to blame the alcohol. My behavior was totally uncalled for. What do I do reddit? How do I manage life knowing that I treated her like this?", "summary": "Called my girlfriend abuses, physically assaulted her, threw her out of the car (although picked her up in 3 minutes). Cant seem to forgive myself. Help me."}
{"id": "t3_3f4wn1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me [26F] with my Fianc\u00e9 [25 M] 7 years, What should I get him for finishing the bar?", "post": "OKAY SO! My fianc\u00e9 and I have known each other since 2008. I met him the second month of my sophomore year in college, the second month of his freshmen year, we both settled at a small liberal arts college up in Pennsylvania. Through mutual friends from our neighboring hometowns (we lived five minutes from each other, knew one anothers friends, i was roommates freshmen year with the chick he went head to head w/ during some student president election thingy)... but... we never knew each other)... we met through magical circumstances; I was pledging a stupid sorority, and he was just getting in the swing of things...navigating his new environment and acclamating...\n\nOUR RELATIONSHIP (plus 7 years of bickering and kissing and fighting and lots of loving and communication...)\n\n+Studying/Traveling Abroad: Vienna, Paris, Rome/Ven\nice, London, Prague, Amsterdam, Brussels... \n+Graduate College (2012) \n+Got into Graduate School \n+ Law School \n+MY *FIRST* adult JOB \n+GRADUATE, LMSW \n+ENGAGEMENT!!! (4.4.15 it was so personal and meaningful and meticulously executed..I am BLESSED.\n+GRADUATE from Law school\n+ BAR EXAM!!\n\nOur families are close. My family got him this classy michael kors messenger brief case....\n\nHe is my best friend, my life partner, my lover, my big one. I am open to all suggestions!", "summary": "What to get for my fianc\u00e9 who just finished taking his bar exam? 6 hours day 1, 6 hours day 2, 3 hours today! merci bien"}
{"id": "t3_4r8rtm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (32F) husband (35M) likes to put me down", "post": "I've been with my husband for 13 years, married for 8 of those years and he have 4 children together.  We've had lots of rough times over the years over a bunch of things but more so over him trying to hook up with women behind my back (6 incidence that I know of). Over the years my self esteem took a nose dive until last year when he left me. He was gone for 5 months and during that time I found myself. I'm not gorgeous and a bit over weight (5 feet, 140lbs) but I know I'm not hideous and can hold my own.  Fast forward to last week,  my husband looked at me and said \"you wouldn't be able to find anyone else if we weren't together\", I couldn't believe it!  I stood my ground and said \"oh yes, I could!!\" He then accused me of trying to find someone else behind his back, which I didn't! I just know I can!  He then looked like he had tears in his eyes and shut me out completely, he hasn't talked to me since then.  What's his problem?! He's acts as if I NEED him!", "summary": "Husband: \"you wouldn't be able to find anyone else if we weren't together\" .. I think I can.  Why would he say that?"}
{"id": "t3_25citm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] Problems with mom [50 F] and School. Everything is going downhill and don't know what to do.", "post": "Hey r/relationships, I've been lurking this subreddit for a while now and I just had to take this off my chest and just ask some questions.\nThis past 2 semester in school I've been doing terrible, it's my third year in college and before this I've been doing really well with a 3.7 gpa. \n\nI guess it all started once my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she was moving to another state. This broke my heart and I had lost all interest in everything. I stopped going to my classes and ended up failing all 4 of them... which ended up in me losing my financialaid and lost the whole next semester due to my uni rules. All I had was my part time job to worry about.\n\nNow this new semester my mom gave me money to get into the uni again but warned me that if I failed again I was out of the house and had to pay her back. She made me quit my job so that I would just focus on school. This just made me get way too stressed and now... I'm doing terrible, I had to drop a class already and will probably fail another class. I feel so useless. I can't even take a damn test without me freaking out and forgetting a lot of stuff. I've been studying a lot but I don't know what's going on with me lately. I used to be a good student but everything it's just been crappy.\n\nI've been thinking a lot about it lately, I'm talking with my mom tomorrow and I know she'll freak out. I'll start looking for another job or apply at the same place that I was before. I am just scared about my future, I feel like a loser.\n\nI need some advice reddit, I don't know what to do :(", "summary": "Been doing shitty in school, mom will probably will kick me out once I tell her I'm still doing terrible and don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2o7ery", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my EX Girlfriend [18 F] 3 Months, Just found out she was cheating on me with her ex", "post": "Let's start by saying I'm not a good looking guy. But this girl was a solid 9/10. We had so much in common and we got along so well. This was really the only girl I've dated that I have wanted to have an actual relationship with and be with for a long period of time. About a month ago, we just kind of stopped talking and it fell off. We would still talk a little bit, but it wasn't the same.\n\n    Earlier today, I was talking with her best friend (we've been friends for a while too) and was told that essentially the entire time we were together, she was hooking up/having sex with her ex. I have a hatred for this guy, he poured sugar in my best friend's gas tank and has threatened to shoot me on multiple occasions. He is the epitome of white trash.\n    \n    I can't confront her about this without screwing my/her friend over, but I really want to just beat the absolute shit out of this kid. Scrawny little fuck would not stand 10 seconds with me without getting knocked out. I know I should be mad at her because she is the one who did wrong, but I would never in my life touch a girl, so this piece of shit is the next best thing. \n    \n    Sorry for the rant I just really had to get it off my chest. Would've used the rant subreddit but I wanted people who might understand to hear.", "summary": "Grimy, hoe-rat of an ex girlfriend cheated on me with her grimy, white trash ex throughout our whole relationship and now I want to beat the living shit out of him."}
{"id": "t3_1fby7x", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Fight over the Wings game. Maybe I should date a Blackhawk fan?", "post": "(24f) It's a Wednesday night and my live in boyfriend(29) of 2 years has no money, and works @ 6 am the next morning. We go back and fourth arguing about who should go. He finally says that I should go. I've worked the last 13 consecutive days, and Have a day off tomorrow. I jump at the opportunity.\n\nOne important factor that I have yet to mention is my beautiful 3 yr old son, who's fast asleep in the house. The live in boyfriend is not the father. \n\nAs I'm getting changed, he begins to get upset. My girlfriends are already at my house harassing me to hurry up. He acts very childish. This only makes me want to leave the house more. Why should he get his way if he's being a child about it? He then goes to stay that he's burdened with my son and I, and before he met us he had more privileges. I ignore this response and leave. \n\n1 hour .\nHe calls all my friends at the table. When they refuse to answer, he calls the bar. I'm so embarrassed... I finally check my phone that I've been reluctant to look at and there's mean texts and a threat to leave the house with my son at home. \n\nWhen I arrive there was no conversation. He knows that I'm not into confrontation until the following day. It's important to react rationally, not emotionally. \n\nA part of me knows I went to the game despite him. At that moment, I felt entitled. It's just a Wednesday! I spent every day taking care of my son and the man child.\n\n I never really ask him for favors like watching my son. Maybe this is why...\n\nI'm wondering about letting him go already. If there's a foundation that lacks understanding, I'm not sure if I want to be a part of it.", "summary": "Fight over who gets to go see the wings play transpires to evil texts and ends with bf leaving house, maybe for good."}
{"id": "t3_2acg0n", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by encouraging my partner to talk dirty.", "post": "So this actually happened a little while ago, but it's one of my favourite stories.\n\nEarlier in the day, I (male) tell my partner (female) this theory about male recovery time after sex, and how it's shortened if another girl comes in - as if the brain is saying \"Oop, better spread your seed!\". I bring it up like this:\n\n\"I read this interesting theory about male recovery time after sex. Like, you know it usually takes around 10-15 minutes for me to get hard again after I come? Apparently that is totally negated if another sexual partner gets involved.\"\n\n\"Really? Huh. That's interesting.\"\n\nSo, a few hours later, we're going at it, as you do, and she starts very obviously wanting to say something. I encourage her. This exchange happens:\n\n-----\n\nHer: \"Well...\"\n\nMe: \"Go on...\"\n\nHer: \"Remember what you said earlier?\"\n\nMe: \"Yeah?\"\n\nHer: \"That idea really turns me on.\"\n\nMe: \"... *really.*\"\n\nHer: \"Yeah. That's hot. That's really hot.\"\n\nMe: \"Do go on.\"\n\nHer: \"I'd love to make you come and then for the door to open...\"\n\nMe: \"Yeah...\"\n\nHer: \"And for this other guy to come in. And he'd just fuck me, hard, until you're ready to go again.\"\n\nMe: \"Uh...\"\n\nHer: \"Fuck, that's so sexy.\"\n\nMe: \"I think you might have misunderstood the nature of the study.\"\n\n----\n\nThen I laughed. A lot. She got really embarrassed, so I had to explain how we'd sort of missed each other somewhere along the line.", "summary": "I thought my partner was going to talk dirty to me about getting another girl involved in the bedroom. Instead I had to watch her getting off on the thought of being rammed by another guy."}
{"id": "t3_37qo1a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] to break up with my long distance girlfriend [20 F] of almost a year often while we are apart, but once I see her in person I completely change my mind every time. What should I do?", "post": "To be honest, I can't completely vocalize why I feel the need to break up with her when we're apart. Some of it has to do with I don't like the long distance thing in general (although we see each other 1-2 times a month), I also don't really like her lack of communication (which we've talked about, but she still hasn't communicated more), and I seem to be more critical of what she does when we're away.\n\nHowever, once we are together, it's a whole different ball game. I'm simply infatuated with her and we do almost everything together.\n\nWhen she leaves, I do get a bit depressed and then after a week, it's back to silently scrutinizing things she's doing and wanting to just end the relationship.\n\nWhat's wrong with me? And what should I do?", "summary": "Think I want to break up with long distance girlfriend between visits. Once we're together, it's the furthest thing from my mind."}
{"id": "t3_2dhp5i", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by shaving my balls.", "post": "Yesterday morning I was multitasking,\n\nI put milk on the stove and then went \nto the bathroom to shave, which in itself is not a good idea.\n\nWhile sitting on the toilet I was listening to my iPod classic and began\nto put on a landing strip. Approching take off I cut myself and propelled my iPod into the bowl, panicking I get up knocking my head against the mirror door.\n\nSo by this time I'm lying on the floor bleeding at multiple spots and confused as hell. After realizing what has happend I plan on getting my iPod and turning it off. Easier said than done, grabbing it out of the bowl I notice that I got no idea how to accomplish this trivial seeming task.\n\nSprinting to my laptop and getting blood everywhere I hold play on my ipod. Nothing happens. I figure out that I have to hold play and center, wait for it to boot up fully(which is an eternity for Apple products) and then turn it off. After 2 minutes or so I finally succeed. \n\nRemember the milk from the beginning? Well me neither. But my alarm did and comes screaming at me while I'm disinfecting nearly giving me a heart attack.\n\nYou'll probably like to know if the iPod is working.\nIt does, but it displays a firewire not plugged in message from time to time (which makes sense I guess, since firewire isn't plugged in)", "summary": "Shaved balls while listening to music, cut myself, propelled iPod into the toilet, injured my head and burned my milk."}
{"id": "t3_1m5eap", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Landlord using \"Lease Abandonment Fee\" to refuse to mitigate broken lease damages", "post": "The following takes place in the state of Ohio, I'll try to keep it brief but it's a little complicated, thanks in advance for any advice:\n\nMy wife and I found a rental house that was perfect for us to move into in mid September. Our apartment's lease does not end until Nov. 30, however. It was mid-August at the time, we let our landlord at large apartment complex know we planned to move out in roughly a month, and they told us, to my surprise, that our only options were to pay a \"lease abandonment fee\" of 2 months rent from the end of a 30 days notice OR find a replacement tenant to take over our lease, for who they would refuse to do the usual cleaning/maintenance done during typical turnover.\n\nThe first option is virtually no different than paying the remainder of our rent, however, and does not seem to be a good faith attempt at mitigating damages, namely because our apartment could easily be re-rented in a far shorter time. In fact, after I told the landlord's office I would attempt to find a replacement tenant, they contacted me to tell me someone was interested in my apartment since it is the only one of our model that will be available in the near future. The leasing agent said she would try to get approval from her manager to have the new tenant start a new 12 month lease with the apartment cleaned. However, she was shot down and told he could only \"take over\" my current lease, then renew if he wanted. \n\nWell, since we have a cat (he is allergic) he did not want to move into an apartment that was possibly uncleaned (I offered to pay for cleaning - the landlord ignored this and the new guy obviously wouldn't want to depend on a former tenant's word that has no longer any stake). I don't see how this sabotage of a potential new tenant is any different than refusing to re-rent and mitigate damages. Can anyone advise me as to whether they are neglecting their duty to re-rent by doing this and refusing to allow me to simply pay rent until it is re-rented?", "summary": "Landlord refuses to offer anything but a massive fee to break lease or lease \"take over\", won't attempt to mitigate damages even when provided with suitable new tenant."}
{"id": "t3_4rd8wh", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Help with major/associates ideas for what I'm interested in", "post": "Okay here's some back story. 22/F/Austin, TX. Been an esthetician for 3 years and I'm extremely bored. Wanting to start college at Austin Community College and I'm not 100% sure what to major in. I want to do something with technology & science (but not too much, don't want math/science to rule my life) and management. I want to be able to make good bank, a little techy, and lots of management. I've always been fascinated by management roles and how they can really shape the entire operation. Any idea what I should major in? I've read about Management Information Systems, seems interesting...but what would I get an associate's in to feed into that? Dis hard. ACC Councelors won't meet with me until I have all my stuff turned in and take a test or two and I'm antsy so I'm asking y'all", "summary": "Want to go back to school and do something with science, management, tech, and money. What are good majors for this and what should I get an associates in? Interested in MIS degree but may not fully understand it."}
{"id": "t3_1j0oty", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My gf [17F] and I [18M] have been dating for 3 years, how do I end it...again...", "post": "I've been dating this girl for three years and in these three years have had the time of my life. I took her virginity and we both fell in love. Looking back, I fell harder than I should have because in the beginning I wasn't serious about the relationship. Now after three years, I am known by her grandparents, parents, and her siblings as (Her name here)'s husband. I never wanted to drag her through this and I feel like complete shit for doing it to her. She loves me way more than I love her and I don't know how to break up with her.\n\nI've tried to end it 3 times and they all resulted in both of us running back to the other crying and begging for forgiveness/another chance. Right now, things are rocky and we haven't spoken for 3 days. She just dropped off (On my front porch at 1 a.m.) what my little brother is calling a \"Care package\" including some notes I wrote her in my Sophomore year, my favorite candy, two cards she purchased and wrote books in, and my favorite stuffed animal from her house. All of this was along with a giant letter P that she made in art class with pictures of us throughout the years. \n\nLike I said, I know this is going to break her heart, but I've kind've already made a connection with an old friend and I'm just ready to move onto another part of my life being just finished with high school (She has another year).\n\nHow should I end this without making her family and friends hate me? Is there a way? Also what should I do about the dog WE purchased and is OURS?", "summary": "My girlfriend and I dated for 3 years, almost broke up a few times. I'm sick of the relationship. How do I end it"}
{"id": "t3_4r6iwo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19M] girlfriend's [17F] mum [late40sF] walked in on me masturbating.", "post": "Me and my girlfriend have been together for a few months. We were hanging out at her place and she went out to pick the pizza I bought. My girlfriend doesn't feel ready to have sex yet so I thought I would quickly jerk of while she was gone to save me feeling frustrated later on in the evening when we normally watch movies and makeout. \n\nMy girlfriends lives in the granny flat bit below her parents house so we have a ton of privacy. I was happily jacking of to my girlfriends underwear thinking she had locked the door on her way out. Turns out she didn't and her mother walked in (without knocking) and caught me right in the middle of everything. She screamed and my girlfriends dad ran down to see what was going on. \n\nIt would have been comical if it wasn't so fucking awful. I was trying to explain myself and her father was yelling at me. Long story short I ended up running because I thought her dad was going to kill me.  \n\nI got a text a few hours ago from my girlfriend saying she didn't think we should be together anymore.\n\nI am beyond devastated. I love my girlfriend and don't want it to end like this. At the same time this is all so fucking embarrassing I don't think I will ever be able to face her family again.\n\nI also left my bag and my laptop at her house and I really need to get it back asap. My bag has a bit of weed in it and I am concerned her parents might find it. I don't know how to ask to get my bag back while still being sensitive. I was thinking maybe I should apologise to her parents? Like writing a letter saying how sorry I am for being so disrespectful or something?\n\nIs there any way to resolve this?", "summary": "Girlfriends mum walked in on me masturbating. I ran. Girlfriend texted me to say we are over. Need to save this relationship and get my bag back."}
{"id": "t3_28godr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] kissed a friend [22 F], she wants to break off contact.", "post": "There's this girl I met when I was hanging out in a bar with some friends last fall. I discovered that we were in the same lecture and started talking to her and asked her out quite soon. Our date consisted in going to a random lecture in the evening. Afterwards she told me that she was not interested in relationships (or even sex) because she had just had a drug-induced psychosis at that time.\n\nWe began hanging out as friends which was ok for me because I had dates with other women and didn't mind us just being friends.\n\nA few weeks ago we started meeting in a more date-like setting and I started becoming interested in her again.I decided to tell her that I wanted to date her. We agreed to meet late in the evening in the garden in front of her apartement block. There she gave me all this talk about her being complicated etc. All while letting me touch and finally kiss her (like 10 times). I suggested that she took some time to think about our relationship. We met yesterday.\n\nWithin a minute she told me that she a) had never thought about me during the last week b) thinks our kiss was \"unnatural\" and c) thinks we shouldn't meet anymore (even as friends).\n\nI'm confused now and decided that it probably is best to forget about her. She seems emotionally unstable and would probably just suck off my energy in the long run. Do you guys agree? Should I break off all contact?", "summary": "I confessed that I wanted to be more than friends. She agreed, we kissed. One week later she say's that she doesn't want to ever see my again. Should I break all contact?"}
{"id": "t3_2l4n3u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17 M] am really insecure and im worried im going to bore my [17F] girlfriend", "post": "My girlfriend is the person I tell everything to and she tells me everything, I had my first kiss with her and all of that cutsie stuff but am also a really self conscious person. \n\nI think im fat which after we first met she told me was a complete lie (and so have other people), I tend to be really quiet in school (we go to different high schools), and Im just really nerdy/geeky (play video games with my friends all weekend, built my own pc, thought myself how to program in python, etc. -she also says she thinks its cut but eh), I never really went out anywhere on weekends until I met her and the list goes on (I think im ugly, she's really good looking, etc. etc.).\n\nWe have a nice time when we're together and can talk for hours on end but I feel like she's just going to get tired of me eventually.\n\nI don't know if im worrying too much about this or not, I'd really appreciate some advice on how to get over this since I've never really had to deal with my insecurities while in a relationship before", "summary": "Im really insecure and dont know how to deal with it and as a result Im scared my girlfriend is going to get bored of me."}
{"id": "t3_4txeim", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [M/22] read some of her [F/21] texts.... I regret it. But I don't know If i should never think about it again or confront her about it.", "post": "So the basis of my relationship with my current gf is stemmed through friendship. We were friends, she broke up with her fianc\u00e9, needed a place to stay and i offered her my spare bedroom. Granted it wasn't anything more than platonic until about 3 months in. Then it was on and off sex, and I gradually fell for her. Now the ex-fiance never really left the picture, but I didn't understand just how much of an issue it was until now. The only reason I went through her iPad to see the texts (we both have apple products only) was because her ex messaged me on Facebook and sent me some... not very pretty screenshots. However these didn't include a date or anything, so I opted to not believe him. But the seed of doubt was placed and it just grew from there. I honestly thought my girlfriend was only ever talking to me (while we were dating, she said this multiple times). We've only been official for about a month mind you, but I read some stuff that makes me question her feelings for me. Basically she never stopped talking to her ex (even though she claimed otherwise) and was also seeing another guy and telling him that she was \"falling pretty hard for him\". Don't chastise me for going through her texts, I feel like shit for it already. I normally don't do that, but something in my gut just told me to. The worst part is that we have a lease together and theres still about 6 months left. I honestly don't know what to do or feel. The only thing I can say for sure is that the \"sexting\" aspect of these texts really only happened before we were official. It's just, how can you tell someone that you're falling for them, then turn around and announce a relationship with someone else?", "summary": "I went through my gf's texts after getting some suspect screenshots from her ex, and found more than I bargained for."}
{"id": "t3_2310k2", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "\"Friend\" blows off plans without telling me one too many times.", "post": "Warning: potential spoiler for game of thrones \n\nA friend of mine has a bad habit of overextending himself and then not telling people that he considers their plans \"canceled,\" leaving them to figure it out for themselves. He'll then come up with some bullshit excuse the next day explaining why he couldn't uphold his obligation and why he didn't let them know. I've witnessed him do this plenty of times, so unfortunately he's developed a \"boy who cried wolf\" syndrome in my mind. \n\nAnyway, he called me yesterday saying how he hasn't seen me in a while (which is because of him pulling shit like what's mentioned above) and asking if he could come over to hang out and watch the game of thrones episode together. I said of course, and asked if he had any weed I could buy--\"yup, 6 kinds.\" Okay, perfect, 'cuz we're dry. At 7:30 he says he's leaving his house (show airs at 9), I think, \"great, he's gonna be early for once.\" 8:30, still not there, text him, no answer. Uh oh. 9:00, episodes starting, still not here. Call him twice, text him, no response. There it is: he's officially not showing up. Luckily another friend, who really *is* a friend, had come over, had some extra bud and was more than willing to share. We all cheered as a certain scumbag choked to death. \n\nFast forward to 12:30 am, about 3 and a half hours later, douchebag texts me saying \"sorry man I fell asleep.\" Bullshit. My response: \"word. [GoT character] died.\"  I knew he had gone somewhere else to watch it, so it wasn't really a spoiler, but it was extremely satisfying to see him squirm and try to pretend like I had spoiled it for him. \n\nSuch sweet vengeance.", "summary": "douchebag friend blows off plans one too many times, doesn't let me know, loses the satisfaction of watching TV's most hated character choke to death."}
{"id": "t3_2bd2o1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "The girl I'm talking to (potential girlfriend 15F) has a mother dying of cancer. She's depressed... What do I (16M) do? I feel like I'm doing wrong anyway.", "post": "Alright, me and this girl have extremely hit off and everything has been fine. \n\nExcept this girl has a mother with stage three cancer and she's being sent to the hospital for a week. The father won't inform her about where the hospital is for some reason.\n\nIt's put a strain on me recently because I'm worry about this girl, because I care and I don't want to see her destroy herself again. She's been so strong through but she broke down when she said her mother is dying. She is currently over her friends house, this guy, and he's having a bonfire. I mean, okay we haven't met since we've been talking because I have work and she's normally gone. However, we talk everyday and on the phone and she says she loves me and all. Which, it does seem like it as our personalities have worked perfectly together and all of that. I don't believe I'm getting played. \n\nHowever, what am I supposed to do? I keep saying to her I don't want to bother her because I feel like I am. She's depressed I know and I felt like she didn't want me to go when I was saying I didn't know what to talk about. I was just calling to see if she was okay. That's all. She was also saying on her own that she hoped my day will go well tomorrow after I was sent home early. I see she still cares. \n\nI just don't know what do I do in this situation. Plus, she seems to always be with her friends now so I promise won't see her. Plus she was raped so that doesn't help either. Although she's bonded and trusted me. So...I don't know. I don't want to be selfish, I just wanted to show her a good time and have her try to be happy some... But I'm passive and it seems her friends are doing a better job than me. \n\nWe just got off the phone and she said she loves me and will either talk tomorrow morning or in the evening when I'm not working.", "summary": "Girl I haven't seen has a mother who has cancer, mother is dying, girl is depressed, what the fuck do I do? Never been in this situation before."}
{"id": "t3_kv8dl", "subreddit": "running", "title": "My first Marathon in 16 days...need pacing advice on my last 'long run' (a half) this Saturday", "post": "So there's the 3rd anniversary of a full, half, 10k, 5k, etc going on this weekend in strikingly beautiful Shepherdstown, WV, which is near my hometown so my dad (an ex-distance runner...he'd average 3 a year back in the day) signed he and I up and I was planning to run it super slow, as I have 12 on the [Hal Higdon Novice 1 training schedule] this weekend before a 2 week taper prior to Baltimore.  \n\nMy first 20 mile run ever this past weekend felt good, and the 14 the week before felt great.  I'm slightly overweight and not as dedicated as I should be-i.e., I have definitely not 'overtrained'-so my marathon plans are more or less to finish and to try to hit 4:20.  My long runs like the 20 miler were around a 10 minute pace...but I feel really good right now and am thinking I could really kick this half marathon's ass if i put my mind to it.  \n\nI ran it in 1:58 last year (9:03) and if I tried I'm pretty sure I could improve upon that.   The question is...should I try?  All this work has been to lead up to the marathon, and following a schedule I have been astonished with my recovery ability, so I'm looking for advice on this.", "summary": "I have my first marathon in just over 2 weeks, but I would like to get a PR on the half I am running this weekend.  Could I really suffer consequences in 2 weeks by going hard this Saturday?"}
{"id": "t3_24zl14", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need some LDR advice.", "post": "So me(22m) and my(18f) have been together for about 9 months now. 6 of which I have moved to Las Vegas with my parents due to bankruptcy. My grandparents live here and are well of with a spare house they were willing to let us live in. \n\nAnyways, back to the point. This whole ordeal has been very rough on the both of us and our relationship to the point were she has given me an ultimatum. Either I figure out a way to get a job back in Maryland and live there so we can be together or we split up. She says she can't take being apart any longer, but she knew going into this relationship that I would be leaving after 3 months. \n\nThat sums up most of what's happening and I need your opinions. I do love this girl and I don't think I could have lived here without having her as support. We FaceTime regularly and talk as much as possible. On one hand I do want to move back but on the other I have made new friends here and am not unhappy in that sense. I don't want to lose her but I'm so confused. Please give me your thoughts.", "summary": "Moved to a different state. My SO can't handle to space apart. She has given me an ultimatum to stay here and be single or move home to be with her."}
{"id": "t3_4rvc08", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The guy [31 m] I've [28 f] been seeing for over a month just told me he's slept with over 50 women", "post": "So I've been seeing this guy for a little over a month and it's been going great! Initially I told him I didn't want anything serious right away and would rather spend time getting to know him first before I put out. He thought that was super respectful of me and he has so far been an amazing guy to be around. I seriously enjoy every second with him.\n\nSo yesterday I finally fucked him and it was mind blowing amazing! I felt good about my decision as we've been hanging out a few times a week, calling each other and in general he has been a stand up guy. I knew the sex would be good because he told me he's been with alot of girls, it didn't bother me that much.\n\nPost sex conversation leads to me asking how many girls has he actually been with. At first he's like \"I don't even know\" and then I asked \"Is it over 50?\" And he kind of laughed and said \" ooooh yeah\"\n\nThe tone in his voice made it seem like he's closer to 100 than 50 and now that bothers me. Initially I assumed maybe 30 women at most, but damn over 50? That seems a bit extreme!\n\nI really would have liked to pursue something serious with this guy eventually but now i'm not so sure if I want to. Should I cut it off before I get in too deep? I don't know if I should trust a guy who's been with THAT many women. He has had a couple of long term relationships but between them he seems to just burn through women. \n\nThoughts?", "summary": "Interested in being serious with a guy till he told me he's been with over 50 women and now I'm not so sure."}
{"id": "t3_1e4o84", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a 27F involved in a possible catfish relationship with a \"26M.\" Help!", "post": "I'm not sure if this is the right subreddit for this kind of post. If it's not, would someone tell me where would be appropriate?\n\nBackground Info: This catfishing relationship of mine has been going on for about 3 months now. He found me on FB and we hit it off pretty quickly. So far he's sent hundreds of dollars of flowers to my work, and we speak on the phone for hours almost every day. I've been trying to finally meet him, but something always comes up at the last minute every time.\n\nI've met this person's \"sister\" in real life a couple times, who is coincidentally...gay. I've met her AND her girlfriend and of course, they both talk about him like he's a real person. All my other friends are telling me that his sister is actually him.\n\nHis FB, Twitter, and IG all check out...and I've done reverse image searches. But after watching \"Catfish\" on MTV, I guess that is to be expected. I'm just finding it hard to believe that someone would spend all this $ and effort into starting a relationship, and then just never want to meet. It's pretty obvious that I should just let this one go at this point. But there is that 1% chance that he really is who he says he is, and that his excuses for not showing up...really are valid. Also, the emotional connection I've formed with this person is hard to break. The curiosity of finding out who this person is has pretty much taken over my life...and I'm just looking for some advice on what to do at this point.", "summary": "It's hard to let go of a possible catfish relationship, because the curiosity of finding out the truth is taking over my life. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_joej3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, should the wife try get \"custody\" of the soon-to-be-ex husband's dog if the animal is special-needs and he can't take care of it because of his job?", "post": "***I am NOT planning of giving neither of them advice/opinions etc. They have lawyers for that. I'm just curious to what reddit thinks of this case. ***\n\n*The dog is a he, but to avoid confusion I will refer to him as \"it\".*\n\nOn going divorce between a friend and her husband of 10 years. The dog is the husband's (he had it before the marriage). **However, for most of the marriage, the wife is the one who walks it, feeds it, cleans after it.** And when it got sick (I am not familiar with animal health issues, but it has to take certain meds regularly) she's the one who takes it to the vet and also started making raw food for the dog to improve its overall health.\n\nHowever, he feels that the dog is \"his dog\" and refuses to part with it/is willing to fight over it.\n\nSome background, feel free to skip:\n\nThe wife is the stay-at-home mom of two boys. She does some contract work when she could. It is not her first choice, but the husband was never home because of his career and often out of the country. (Which makes him unfit to take care of the dog) After giving birth to the second child, he asked her to stay home so he could focus on his career and she could take care of:\n\n1. Two boys.\n2. The elderly in-laws. (80 and 75 now)\n3. House-hold chores.\n4. The dog. (walking it, taking it to the vet, giving it meds, making food for it)", "summary": "Man too busy to care for the dog he got before marriage, dog got sick before wife asked for divorce, both the wife and him want to keep the dog."}
{"id": "t3_p00n8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What was/is the coolest teacher you've ever had? I'll start.", "post": "My english teacher had gone to an island with some college buddies Lord of the Flies style. He paid a fisherman with a shady boat 10 dollars to drive them to the island and pick them up. When on the island, numerous pounds of cocaine washed up on the shore. The police in the area showed up and picked up the cocaine while my teach and his friends were in the treeline. When they got to shore a couple of days later, they found they had been followed by the police and got arrested for questioning.\nHe also told the officials at a horse race in Italy he was with the press and had a press badge. He showed them his YMCA id and got in for free. (It was an expensive race)\nHe feels free to curse and say orgy cause he doesn't care if he gets fired, \"I can get a job anywhere anytime.\" He's pretty much awesome.", "summary": "Went to an island, got arrested for suspected cocaine smuggling, snuck into an expensive horse race, cusses."}
{"id": "t3_3oy0qw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [M,19] gave me a scalpel \"as a joke\" after I [F,19] told him about my issues", "post": "Long story short, my friend who is a male, gave me a scalpel as a joke after I told him my issues and my mental anxiety. He was so keen to see me, texting me all through out the day telling me that he had a present and a surprise for me. He insisted on going out to grab a drink with our other mates. I was hesitant to go out at first but then I ended up going. When I saw my friend I asked what the surprise/present was, He said\n\n\"I know you have been down lately so I got you a....\"\n\nAnd handed me a scalpel that he stole from his biology prac.\nI was so shocked, as if I was hit in the hammer and I was so shocked and mortified that it took me a while to process what has just happened. There were other people, and they were half laughing and surprised. I didn't know what to do so I just left.\n\nTo be honest, I don't know how I feel. I have been very nice to him all the time. He has got a lot of people that dislikes him and I have always defended him. I always saw the good in him. But now, I don't know how I would be able to see him anymore. Especially after I told him about my struggles and my crisis that I am going through at the moment.  But for someone to tell me go and actually kill myself was very confronting, and not just verbally abusing me but actually giving me the means to kill myself and the fact that he said with no qualms, but laughing about it. \n\nWhat should I do?", "summary": "My friend [M,19] gave me a scalpel \"as a joke\" after I [F,19] told him about my issues and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_36g2o8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (27M) coworker (29F) keeps asking me what to do about her husband's (30ish M) behavior.", "post": "Background:  She's been married for a few years.   It was an arranged marriage.  She has a kid.  She was already a US citizen and her husband wasn't.   He has citizenship now.  I don't know her husband, but I've met him once and I usually follow my instinct when I meet people because it's never been wrong.  I didn't like this guy.  \n\nProblem according to my coworker:  This guy flirts with other girls constantly on Facebook.  He talks to girls back in India and random girls on Facebook.   He did most of this behind her back.   When she found out, she was crushed, but gave him a chance to fix it.   One year later he hasn't stopped and made multiple accounts.  She read over these messages when she gets on the computer. \n\nShe kept giving him a chance over and over because she loves him.   She talked to his parents and her parents because it's customary in their culture.   Her parents were disgusted by his behavior.   His parents said, \"well, he hasn't done anything yet so what's the problem?\"  \n\nShe says that he used her to get citizenship so he can move his family here.   She even signed the papers this year to get them a green card.  She says she doesn't know what to do anymore. \n\nMy opinion:  She should just divorce the guy.   He makes her feel like shit all of the time.   He's cheating on her on an emotional level.  He obviously has zero respect for her.   She's financially stable by herself.  She has resources to take care of her kid.  \n\nCurrent situation:  She keeps asking me what she should do.   I don't know if I should say what I feel.  Her siblings and parents hold the same opinion as me.   I don't understand why someone should even think about staying with someone like that.", "summary": "Coworker's husband is emotionally cheating on her.   She asked for my advice.   I've never been in any relationship so I wouldn't know where to begin."}
{"id": "t3_22eihq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21M) am having a problem breaking ties with a long time friend/short time so (19F)", "post": "I initially knew this girl because we dated in HS, and it went on and off with her telling me she wasn't interested, to showing signs. All of our friends thought we were perfect, and some of her family even calls me an in-law. \n\nAnyways, I don't care much for their opinion as they're not the ones that decide. However after all this time, I'm fed up but I avoid taking drastic measures because our main group is just mutual friends. I invested too much in our friendship/relationship and I'm tired of it (example for reference: her birthday i drove her to a beach, to a mountain, and home. I even made her a cake from scratch. We were out from like 8pm to 5am.) All she does is text me when she needs something. It was my birthday a few weeks ago and she didn't bother/know and made no mention of it. It's obviously a one sided relationship and I'm not okay with that.", "summary": "Don't know how to break ties/contact with an unsupporitve friend/(past SO) with whom I share a lot of mutual friends."}
{"id": "t3_378nr9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I, [28M] with my girlfriend [23F], have been together for six years, I don't know where to go with this relationship.", "post": "We've been together for years, we have lived together for the past 15 months.  \n\nI went round a mates house a few nights back and was hanging out with a few people, lots of drinking and there was a girl there [30F] who tried to get things going with me.\n\nI told her I had a girlfriend and nothing happened, in the end I put her in a bed upstairs, she asked that I sleep in the bed with her and she assured nothing would happen. I said no and went downstairs and fell asleep on the sofa.  \n\nThat was two days ago and I haven't stopped thinking about her, I'm in a bind, was this just a drunken evening thing with no real substance to it? I didn't do the whole go out and sleep around thing when I was younger, I've only slept with three women all of which were when I was in a relationship with that woman.  \n\nThe excitement of the other night I felt was really good and it may be even more so because my current relationship is kind of stagnant, we don't really have much sexual contact.  \n\nThe other part of the relationship I am in is that I can't really plan my future because my girlfriend says that she doesn't know if she wants to get married or wants to have kids because she is too young to think about it. I know my stand point on these two things and I don't want to be wasting my time if this relationship isn't leading anywhere.", "summary": "Should I try and move on from my current girlfriend, maybe play the field a bit and try to find someone who wants the same as I do rather than wait a few years to find out?"}
{"id": "t3_1yqthd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24 M] I'm having difficulty communicating with my girlfriend [24 F] of almost four years. Tips for effective communication?", "post": "My girlfriend and I are having some difficulty communicating effectively with one another. I have a very difficult time verbalizing my feelings and it's becoming a bit of an issue in our relationship. It's very difficult for me to even be in touch with my feelings, much less verbalize and communicate them effectively. It's even difficult for me to talk at length about the small things in life, such as what goes on at work.\n  \nI pretty much only tell people things on a need-to-know basis. I know that's very unhealthy for a relationship, but it's something that I have great difficulty with. I feel very uncomfortable just sharing things about my life and my feelings. My girlfriend has complained that whenever we have a disagreement that they go on for way too long and that they feel like pulling teeth because it takes so long for me to be able to communicate what I'm thinking/feeling. I'm not doing this on purpose and it's very distressful for me. Most of the time, I'm not even fully aware of what I'm feeling. With regards to attachment theory, I'm on the avoidant side of the spectrum and I tend to bury a lot of what I feel. I want to be able to share things with my girlfriend, but it's so difficult for me to open up. This is a behavioral pattern that I've had for as long as I can remember. Is there anything that I can do to change it? It feels so ingrained that it almost feels automatic. Does /r/relationships have any suggestions? I'm already seeing a therapist and it's helping, albeit very slowly.", "summary": "I have a very difficult time opening up with my girlfriend and it's causing communication problems in our relationship. What can I do to facilitate more effective communication and to be better in touch with my feelings?"}
{"id": "t3_219g8j", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Should I [24/m] ask out the intern [22/f]?", "post": "For the past seven weeks there has been an intern at my company. She is doing a graduation internship there for about 2 more months. We talked a bit, she is going to the same college I went to (different degree though) and I made her laugh a couple times. To make it easier I know she's not seein anyone at the moment.\n\nThe reason I'm asking this is because I have never had a relationship that wasn't over the internet. In fact I only had the one online one... \n\nObviously I am not the most socially succesful guy, but the past years I made progress:\n\n- Lost weight (less than 1 kg to get my BMI under 25, that's pretty cool).\n- Went on my first date(s) last year.\n- Bought a car.\n- Got an okay financial situation.\n\nGetting along with friends, coworkers, familiy and random people is no problem. It's just that on date-like situation my personal pecularities are more likely to show as \"odd\". Perhaps this is just some lingering insecurity.\n\nBesides all that: this is at my job. I plan on leaving before I turn 25, but still possibly a bad idea?", "summary": "I have no idea what I'm doing. Is asking a girl you have only spoken to a few times at work a good idea?"}
{"id": "t3_ntjyx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it wrong to think that one of my friends from college can do MUCH better than his current girlfriend?", "post": "I have a friend who wasn't able to return to our college due to financial reasons (my school is not cheap at all) and is finishing his degree back in his home state. He's now in a relationship with this girl that I personally believe is way below is league. I feel like an asshole, because she is probably super sweet, but I just feel like he could do better. I have not said a thing to him obviously, but I'm trying to figure out if what I'm thinking/feeling is inherently wrong. The chances of me meeting her are slim to nothing, but to think about what his other friends from our school would say if they realized, it makes me worried. (Yes I know this makes them not good friends)\n\nPersonally, I think she his overweight and maybe a 4 on a good day - he seems to have actually dropped weight (and he was in shape already) and I think most girls would give him a 7-8. I realize I'm judging her solely on looks, but I feel like he's settled. We're seniors, and it hasn't been happening for long, but I just don't know if it's right or wrong for me to think this. Any suggestions?", "summary": "Friend from college is dating a girl I think is way below his \"league\" and that he could do better - haven't said anything, but I feel like an asshole. Is this wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_1e4z4l", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(23/M), I'm not sure why but most the women I date love that I'm nice, hate that its easy for them.", "post": "I must preface this with where I'm at: one of the biggest party schools in the U.S. and one of the biggest portrayed hook-up cultures I have ever seen. I also do fall for some I date really quickly, so I get a bit more hooked at the beginning, but then mellow out really fast.\n\nI'll define \"nice:\" Actually taking women out on dates, being available, wanting to spend time with them, not ignoring them. Not letting petty shit bother me and letting them do them.\n\nWhenever I try to date women these days it seems like I'm torn between being the \"nice guy\" and being a gentlemen about things and being a complete douche. \n\nWhenever I'm a gentlemen, treat them well, take them out for drinks, and try to spend time with them they back way off. As soon as I pull the plug and back away they come back. As soon as I show lack of attention to them, they seem to try hard to get my attention back.\n\nFor example, one female friend who I've distanced myself from literally offered me sex (She is very attractive) if I would just take her out drinking with my friends. That's a bit of a red flag to me but the weird part is I ignore her for many reasons (one is she is a bit crazy at times and I just don't deal well with crazy) but she still throws herself at me.\n\nThe worst part is the women in my life I confide in tell me that's \"just how it works\" and \"play the game.\" So even though I'd love to spend time with someone I need to just make excuses and be busy 95% of the time? Then one day hang with them? That seems like one hell of a stupid game to me.\n\nQuestion: Should I just approach the dating scene in this atmosphere as, well, not a dating scene? Act like a typical \"Douche\" and confident guy and walk away?", "summary": "Nice guy doesn't work, confident douche who doesn't care does. What should I do when I'm looking for something more serious?"}
{"id": "t3_4s3zva", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] been seeing [20 F] for just over a month, need help understanding relationship", "post": "I've been talking to this girl for just over a month now. We have been working together at a fast food place for about a year now and we have always been kinda just work friends where we say hi to each other and maybe talk every now and then during work. \n\nI would really appreciate some help in understanding how my relationship is going. Is my relationship progressing at a normal rate, is everything I'm going through the usual stuff for a relationship of this length? I really enjoy spending time with this girl so I guess I'm happy but I'm seeking an outside opinion. \n\nI have a legit problem with overthinking things, so maybe that is whats happening here. Within the last week or so I have started noticing some of her tendencies, such as her always judging what I say, never wanting to ask to hangout and instead waiting for me to ask, and every now and then she sends me low effort texts(IMO atleast) like \"ahahah yeah!\" and \"looool true\". \n\nI know that for a relationship to be successful you need to be able to accept your partners faults... however I just feel like I'm putting in a lot more effort than she is. \n\nI know this last part is a bit selfish... but atleast what some of my friends have told me my relationship sexually with this girl is apparently really far behind. After just over a month with this girl all we have done is make out and feeling out and rubbing all over eachothers bodies. We havent done anything sexual yet. Are my friends wrong in thinking that this is far behind where we should be?\n\nI think this is another problem of how I am approaching the relationship. I feel like I always expect the nights to end in an intimate experience. I think this is the wrong approach.. but I don't know how to get the thoughts out of my mind. Maybe its because I've never had a sexual experience before so I'm just really excited and anxious, but the times I enjoy the most with this girl are the times where we just chill, spend time together and talk... not the makeouts and whatever.\n\nThanks for reading guys :-)", "summary": "Been seeing a girl for just over a month, unsure if relationship is progressing at normal speed, need help dealing with her tendencies."}
{"id": "t3_35ffyd", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by pretty much dancing in front of my teacher", "post": "***This a a re-post due to changing accounts*** \n\nSo pretty much what happened was:\nMy friend always gets me food for break (in high school), why? No idea. Just a thing that started happening, anyway. He bought me milk and a doughnut (donut for US) and I got the milk and put it where my fly should be and I went to my band room like that. After getting there I made everyone laugh and then I started laughing and the milk carton went down my leg. Everyone laughed more while I was hoping around the room, kicking my other leg trying to get this milk carton out. I had my back to the door and while I was fucking around my teacher came in and as he did the milk slipped out. I picked it up and turned to leave the room and then I saw him looking quite confused. He asked me \"What are you doing?\" to which I held up the carton of milk and replied \"My water got stuck somehow\" and swiftly left the room knowing I had fucked up and looked like a dumbass...", "summary": "A milk carton slipped down my leg and I tried to get it out in a 'awkward' way on purpose while my teacher had walked into the room and stood there watching me."}
{"id": "t3_35jk5k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] found out bfs [22m] of 5 years most visited website is a BBW porn site. Asked him about it, awkwardness and anger occurred. What should I do??", "post": "Today I was on my bfs desktop opening a new tap to look for a calorie counting site to help me lose weight. When u opened the tab it showed his most visited sites.  One of them was a BBW porn site, the thumbnail was a big naked woman. Now I'm not a skinny girl by any means. But these women were morbidly obese. He was lying in the bed next to me and I calmly said. \"Oh one of ur top sites is a BBW site, I know u like bigger girls, it's that the type of porn u watch?\"\n\nNow reddit we have been together for 5 years and we are really open with each other. He knows my type of porn is hentai and bondage stuff, he watched and read some of it with me. So I was really caught off guard by his reaction. He totally shut down on me, told me to leave him alone and do what I had to do on  the computer and not to ask him about it. His tone was really cold and rude.  I said okay and that I didn't mean to upset him and that I hope he could eventually talk to me about because I would like to know. He didn't respond and went and laid down. \n\n For the rest of the day he wouldn't speak to me and eventually just slept for 3 hours with me just playing games on my phone and DS. I had plans tonight with my mom so I finally told him I had to leave and woke him up. He just looked at me and then rolled over and ignored me. 20mins later I told him again and he just looked  at me again and didn't respond.  So I got up and left. He just texted me asking why I left in such a rush and am always so nosey? \n\nSo I am at a loss here. I was thinking i should just drop it, maybe he was embarrassed. But he knows all my kinks and fetishes I don't understand why he reacted the way he did. What should I do? Should I try talking to him about it and his response?", "summary": "discovered BBW porn site was one of bfs most visited sites. Asked him about it, he told me to leave him and alone and ignored me for the rest of the day. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4e3byw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by taking a drunk shower.", "post": "So during the very early hours of the morning ~2:00a.m. I came back to my dorm after a party super drunk. Decided to take a warm relaxing shower. So since my drunk ass can barely stand I sit down and enter this meditation type state. When I do this meditation like thing I stay awake but I cant hear anything and I pay no attention to literally anything. So finally I decide to get out of the shower and my roommate is there yelling at me that I flooded the room. I go out and I realize that my drunk ass was on the drain so there was water about a cm high on our floor. So I had to for about 30 mins use all my towels and clothes to try to soak up the water. Now it has been 12 hours and our floor is still damp, and because I used my all my clothes and towels to clean it up I have been doing so much laundry today to clean all the dirty clothes I have created. I have used probably about 15 bucks on laundry today FML.", "summary": "Sat on drain the of the shower and flooded my dorm and I have to do an expensive amount of laundry because of it."}
{"id": "t3_2tz0oh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [21 F] painfully shy and terrible at making friends.", "post": "I have a couple of friends that I've known for years, and I'm really close to them, and I live with my boyfriend, but I started university recently and have made no new good friends. There are a few girls that I will say Hi to if I see them, and would probably sit with them if I saw them before a lecture, but we haven't even exchanged numbers and have never seen each other outside of university.\n\nWhen I'm one-to-one with someone I'm much better: I can be myself, joke around and have fun. I'm actually quite a fun person. But when I'm in a group of new people/people I don't know well I feel so ridiculously self-concious, sometimes I just want the ground to swallow me up. \n\nI find it near impossible to join new societies/clubs. I've tried, made it so far as paying for a membership to the hiking society (I enjoy hiking) but haven't picked up my membership card and haven't been on any hikes! \n\nI feel kind of ashamed that I'm not part of a group. People keep talking about their friends and how they're glad they met all these new people in first term, and how friends are great to study with. I'm embarrassed that I don't have that. I usually sit alone in lectures (which is okay by me, as I am usually awkward when talking to people anyway) but I feel like people are judging me for being a loner.\n\nI know the kinds of things I should be doing: joining societies, starting hobbies etc, but actually DOING those things is so hard for me. I've been THINKING about getting counselling through the university for months and haven't acted. I suffered from depression/anxiety for years before going to the doctors and getting anti-depressants (which I am still on).\n\nIf anyone has been in a similar situation and has any advice for me, I'd really appreciate it.", "summary": "I'm shy and awkward and a bit of a loner, and I don't know how to make myself change."}
{"id": "t3_1kglj5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/m] \"cheated\" on girlfriend [19/f], she forgave me, i feel obligated to stay with her?", "post": "We've been together about a year. Around the 3-month mark, I was staying somewhere with friends, including a very short-term ex (who happens to be a male), and one night, I woke up to him holding me and trying to do something sexual.\n\nI know it was wrong of me to not push him off, but I was a pussy and didn't want to hurt his feelings (we were still friends), so after a long time of him wanting to get something, my biological instincts responding positively (I was hard), I muttered, \"go for it\" and he blew me.\n\nI told my girlfriend the next day and she later told me she cried twice after we hung up. But after lots of apologizing and even the guy consoling me, saying he abused(/lightly raped???) me, she forgave me and our relationship was fine again, around two weeks later.\n\nBut a month after the incident, my girlfriend broke up with me, and I asked if it had to do with the incident and she said she's not sure. But she wanted to keep in touch and a few weeks later, we're back together.\n\nBut now, I'm considering breaking up with her (oh god it'll be tough), but because she forgave me for the incident, I'd feel horrible to end it. But it'd be beneficial for her, too, I think she's just too afraid of losing me to break up with me.", "summary": "She forgave me for a confusing \"cheating\" incident, but now I think we should break up; I feel like I owe her. Please help."}
{"id": "t3_1at4mo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F26] adopt a cat and one of my roomates [M25] turns out to be allergic, he wants me to get rid of the cat, i don't. What's our half way?", "post": "Me: [F26]\nDonald: [M28]\nRichard: [M25]\n\nAs the title says, I [F26] adopt a cat one month ago. I've move out from my sister house (you could read it in my username) cause i'm bisexual, all of my family stop talking to me (till now) and i end up alone looking for an apartment.\n\nI ask one of my friends (let's call him Donald) to move out with me [M28] he's such a great guy, we found a great place but we needed another person to rent it, he ask one of his friends (let's call him Richard) to move in with us. The lease it's on my name.\n\nSo we all move in together and everything was \"fine\" untill i adopt a cat. Her name it's Pippi and it's the best cat ever :) she's sweet and i feel so great when i'm with her, after everything i've been through it's soo great to get home with my baby girl :)\n\nDick told me that he's allergic to cats so i left Pippi stay only in my room and never leave it, but yesterday he told me that he want's the cat out cause he can't take it anymore. I understand that he's allergic but my cat never leave the room, not even to poop (she has everything in my room) so i don't believe that she could create such a big problem if she never leaves the room.\n\nI don't wanna get rid of Pippi just because he ask me to, that's my house too, but i also don't wanna \"put myself in that position\" where it's him or my cat. Does anyone else knows any way we could solve this without get rid of my cat or him to leave?", "summary": "I adopt a cat and one of my roomates it's allergic, he want's me to get rid of the cat but i don't want, what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_wxruy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/M] my girlfriend[17/F]'s parents found out we had sex. Help?", "post": "First post, some background:\n\nWe've been in a relationship for about 7 months now, and the physical aspect of it didn't start until about 5 months in. She's always been innocent, as in never done anything in her life sexually. As for me, I wasn't a virgin going into the relationship, messed around with a lot of people before. However, I was completely fine not doing anything for those 5 months, then one day we started doing regular teenage things with our bodies. (not sex.) Things progressed from there, and the past couple weeks we've been having great, regular sex, my parents being out of town and her sleeping over at my house while telling her parents she was somewhere else.\n\nWell, today she calls me and tells me that her parents know everything that's been going on. Her dad is very uptight, strict, etc; and he and I were pretty cool before this all happened. One of those intimidating \"you-want-my-daughter-go-through-me\" type of guys, but we hit it off okay. Her mom is also like that, but less so in that she isn't aggressive. (I should also mention her dad was in the hospital for high blood pressure a few weeks ago.) \n\nAnyway, what should I do? Our relationship likely won't ever be the same again, but it was the healthiest I've ever had with a person. Her parents hate me, and I'm going to college in a month or so, is this just the right time to break things off? We've talked and we'd still be friends, of course, but it's pretty rough. Do I continue the relationship and make it hard on her because of her parents? Or should I try to patch things up with them so I can even show my face around their neighborhood? (Unlikely.)\n\nHelp!", "summary": "She lied to her parents, we had sex, her parents found out/hate me, do we break it off or attempt to make it better?"}
{"id": "t3_34rf97", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my SO [23M] of two years, what do you think about starting close relationships with people of the opposite sex after you started dating?", "post": "My amazing boyfriend works as a server at a high end restaurant. His coworkers are all partiers, we are not. He frequently complains about all of his coworkers and their morals.\n\nApparently these two girls who he used to work with came into the restaurant and started a conversation with him. I have never met them. My boyfriend has started going out for coffee with just the two of them. I've never been invited. \n\nI'm feeling a little jealous. He has said that in the past, he was friends with mostly girls because he liked the affection girls give. Which leads me to believe that's the reason why he wants to hang out with them. I had never even heard about them before at all, which makes me wonder why he is pursuing them as friends. Apparently they have some of the same interests, though. With one of the girls in particular. \n\nBF also said at one point that he wants to have some separate friends. Which I know is healthy, but I feel excluded, and that he doesn't want me around these girls for some reason. We have friends that we are both friends with, of both genders. Why are these girls so different?\n\nHow would you feel? If I'm crazy, just tell me :) I'll work on it. I haven't brougjt this up with him, as I feel like it's my job to own and work on my insecurities. He doesn't have many dude friends.\n\nI'm afraid that my past experiences of SO's cheating is clouding my judgement. I'm also afraid to let him know I'm insecure about this. \n\nThanks!", "summary": "Boyfriend has two girls he is friends with, I'm never invited to come along. Scared my insecurities are making me weird!"}
{"id": "t3_1paesw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my wife [26 F] married for 3 years, she went on a double date type thing.", "post": "My wife went to a pokemon conference thing with a friend while I was away for work for a long amount time, about a month. She told me she was out to dinner. I asked later on if she was with her friend. She said she was and with two other guys. I freaked out a little and called her. She said one was gay and the other was ugly, asian, and nerdy. I still said going out like that felt inappropriately. I admit, I was upset and was a little rude to her. She said I blindsided her and she did not expect me to be upset. I told her I felt uncomfortable with date type situations. She says the atmosphere was not like a date at all. I trust everything she is saying. I still think it was inappropriate. I could just be immature and I am open to what you guys' think.", "summary": "Wife went out with a friend,a nerd, and a homosexual. Two were male. Twas not the friend."}
{"id": "t3_xafw9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's your worst day ever?  I'll start, because I just had mine.", "post": "I went to work and had set up and interview for my fiances little brother with my manager.  Manager forgot.  Little brother shows up and asks for manager, is told by bartender that she won't be in until 5, and she'll be in tomorrow morning at 10 if he wants to come back then.  I tell manager later in the evening that he was there, and asked if she wanted him to come back in the morning like the bartender said.  Manager gets pissed that bartender said this, bitches out bartender and throws \"katelynroxx said\" in there.  Bartender comes back to find me to scream in my face about how I'm a lying little bitch etc. etc.  Over and over again she yelled at me, and she's lucky I was so tired or I would have hit her.  It's my fiances birthday today, and he decided to go to a bar that is owned by my cousins that I don't get along with (giant family feud) so I'm not allowed in.  My neighbor calls and asks if I need beer because he's at the store.  I didn't know what time my fiance was getting home so I asked him to grab me a 12 pack.  Fiance gets home and I ask him if he wants to go next door with me for a beer.  He flips the fuck out saying we only do things that I want to do and he never gets to do what he wants to do (just got back from the bar I'm banned from, mind you)  Then he proceeded to bitch at me for never \"wanting\" to spend time with him.  I work 50 hours a week, 6 days a week, and go to school full time because I'm trying to make my/our lives better.  I have a 3.9 GPA and have worked my ass off to have that, and get bitched at for it.  My only day off is Tuesday and he chooses to go shooting (which I hate, so I don't go) every Tuesday.  Who's not spending time with whom now?", "summary": "Almost quit my job, not sure if I'm going tomorrow, can't go to bar with fiance to celebrate his birthday, get screamed at for having a job and a 3.9 GPA."}
{"id": "t3_3e1g57", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19F] with my long-distance boyfriend [18M] of 1 year want to meet up but my mother dismisses it as immaturity", "post": "Sean and I met via an MMORPG, and dated after a few months of back and forth awkward flirting, stuff like that. We met up for the first time in September last year (he flew over to my country and we aren't actually that far from each other, ~1 hour trip)\nSince then, he has flown over every 2-3 months for about 3 days on average. Because our cultures frown upon teenagers dating, I usually told my parents I was meeting up with my friends for the day. \n\nTo clarify, I only hang out with him during the day and go back at home at night. About 3 months ago, we decided that I should fly over instead, because 1) it's getting increasingly expensive for him, 2) his family wants to meet me for real, and 3) we wanted more personal space during our limited time together. Here's the problem. I have already planned out the itinerary, arranged flight tickets and lodging for both of us, since it's cheaper to book/cancel early. My mother simply *refuses* to entertain the thought of me going to see a supposed stranger in a different country, although said country is an hour away. The trip is supposed to be in early September.\n\nI understand her thinking, as my previous relationship did not end so well, but I want to prove to her that I am mature enough to do this alone. She believes that I do not understand what love entails, and that it is only puppy love. It might be, but I sincerely want to give it my best shot. I adore my BF and his brothers, and would like to see them face-to-face at least once. Any starting steps? I'm willing to add on details if asked.", "summary": "Long-distance relationship, my parents will not let me go overseas alone as they believe I am too immature. I have about 1 month to convince them."}
{"id": "t3_pwmet", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, What is your \"What are the chances?\" or seemingly improbable story?", "post": "Tell me your story in which the chances of it happening were extremely unlikely. Was it a series of decisions that lead to an improbable outcome? Was it meeting someone you hadn't seen for years? Was it an abnormal decision that saved your or someone else's life?\n\nI will start:\n\nRoad trips were very common for my work and they were usually about 5 hours of almost continuous driving in one day. Normally, I would always take shotgun, but this time I decided to be nice and give it to my coworker. I also never fall asleep on these trips but this time I decided to take a nap. This time, I decided to just slouch in my seat and sleep isntead of lying down across the back seat as I normally do. \n\nHere come the fun part. The vehicle we were travelling in rolls over.\n\nBoth the person in shotgun and I had fallen asleep, leaving the driver by himself. I was the only one who sustained physcial injuries, mainly due to the seat in the vehicle I had chosen to sit in. I also wonder if, had I stayed awake, I could have kept the driver entertained and engaged, so that this accident could have been avoided. If I had layed across the seats as I normally do while sleeping, I would have died.", "summary": "Series of unfortunate decisions leads to a car accident and physical injury, but a series of fortunate decisions saves my life. So many variables playing together that result in an odd experience. So reddit, what is your story?"}
{"id": "t3_g85e5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm finding myself becoming more and more misogynistic, based entirely on my interactions with women. It's working for me. What are your thoughts?", "post": "The only relationship with a woman I respect is the one I have with my mother. She's consistent in the way she treats me. It's a mutual love and respect, like any healthy person has with his/her mother.\n\nNow, to explain my post better. I realize the stupidity of title. I realize that misogyny is a higher form of generalization. I realize that it's not based on logic, but just experience. I can't stop it though. I can't stop the way I think.\n\nI'm by no means a social outcast or not in contact with women. I'm apparently attractive (sounds really douchey). Every time I've treated female partners, coworkers, friends with respect and politeness general niceness, I get walked all over. They're never, never, reciprocal relationships. As soon as I started treating girls like shit, with disrespect/generally not giving a fuck about them, the dynamics changed. I don't wait for response I take complete control.\n\nMaybe I'm crazy, I don't know. Women of reddit, tell me in what situations you'd start treating a guy like shit/walking all over them or don't, I don't give fuck.\n\nThere's more to this but I can't be fucked typing more.", "summary": "I started treating women like shit and life got better. When ever I treated women with respect I was disrespected. The relationships were never reciprocal."}
{"id": "t3_49wwf5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend[16 F] of 6 months, potential talk about jealousy", "post": "Hello, lets start with some \"names\".  My girlfriend's \"name\" is Megan, and my 2 friends involved are \"Julia\" and \"Hannah\"\n\nI hope to make this brief.  So my girlfriend and I have been dating for 6 months, she is fabulous, our relationship is really great. However, I learned something today that I found slightly troubling.  Long story short, it seems my girlfriend doesnt like very much when I hang out with my two friends Julia and Hannah.  Today my gf was out of town for something school related, so I hanged with my two friends.  I always gave Megan info like \"yeah i think ima hang with Julia and Hanna when you're out of town\" and she usually says something like \"haha okay sounds good.\"  And I ask her \"you're fine with that right\" and she'd say \"With Julia? Ya of course.\" There has been a few times where like we'd go to Spot coffee and get some food together, always the 3 of us (Me, Julia, and Hannah). I have always believed Megan had not cared... until today.  \n\nToday Julia and Hannah told me that Megan isnt always very nice to them.  Such as, giving \"looks\" to them in the hall.  Or not saying Hi if they see each other.  Apparently Megan only says hello and stuff when Im with her.  Anyway, I never knew this.  As I said, Megan always seemed perfectly fine with me hanging out with my friends.  In addition, she has a good amount of guy friends, so its not like she doesnt understand..  I hang out with Megan a lot, just not ALL the time, I like hanging with friends too.\n\nIn the end, I would like to talk to Megan about this (In person, not text).  How can I bring this out without sounding like I am \"accusing\" her, I just wanna talk about their concerns.  Thanks, I cant be the only guy in history that has had this happen :P", "summary": "GF is probably jealous about me spending time with friends, friends feel slightly threatened by gf.  How can I bring this up to my GF?"}
{"id": "t3_1otdvp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do I [21F] have a right to sell something that my ex [21M] of four years gave/sold me upon our breakup?", "post": "I had a breakup six months ago with my then-boyfriend of four years. Upon breaking up, we did the old breakup ritual of giving stuff back. He said I could keep a Takamine guitar he had been letting me use, and requested that I only send him a check for $25 for it. I did, I kept the guitar, and that was that.\n\nI thought we parted on good terms, but now we don't talk anymore as he broke off contact with me quite bitterly (he's somewhat emotionally unstable). I do play the guitar on a near daily basis. I don't know how much it's actually worth.\n\nThis week, I came home from college, and my best friend just out of the blue *gave* me--for free--a black Ibanez guitar that I absolutely LOVE. More so than the Takamine. For this reason, I'm thinking of selling the Tak--I really don't need two guitars, I could use a little extra money, and I think I have appropriate enough closure on the relationship that I could leave this part of it behind.\n\nMy problem is I don't know if it's acceptable to sell something that someone who you no longer have contact with gave you. If it's not acceptable, then I apologize if my question (or I) was rude in any way.", "summary": "Ex-boyfriend gave (sold) me a guitar, have recently acquired a better guitar and am thinking of selling the one he gave (sold) to me. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_35r3mp", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by buying the morning after pill.", "post": "Alright reddit. It happened yesterday. \n\nAfter an engaging night with my bf, I decided to take further precautions to reduce chances of pregnancy. Walked into Walgreens to the pharmacy counter and said I would like to purchase plan B. The young male clerk walked around the counter and got it from an aisle for me (oops didn't know I didn't have to go to the pharmacy for it), and then proceeded to ring me up. This is where I fucked up.\n\nAs he rang me up, I noticed those little packs of portable tissues were all along checkout counter and were on sale. Soo, as I've been suffering from allergies, I decided I was gonna splurge and said, \"Oh! I could definitely use these too!\" and threw like 6 packs onto the counter. Lmao the poor guy stared at me with a priceless look of horror and confusion on his face. I then realized what I'd done. It took all of what I had to not crack up laughing.", "summary": "Accidentally paired my purchase of the morning after pill and a ton of kleenex, which clearly freaked out the dude ringing me up"}
{"id": "t3_2l95ec", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28M] met a girl [20F] who has a baby. She wants to bring her baby to our first date. Not sure how I feel about it.", "post": "So I met her over the Halloween weekend, she's a friend of a friend of mine. We got along well and she didn't hide the fact that she has a kid (1 year old) despite being so young. I got her number and we agreed to meet up and go out on a date sometime. Cool. Now I asked her yesterday when she's available, she said thursday but she has to bring her baby. \n\nNow I'm not sure how I feel about this. If I was in her situation, I wouldnt want to expose my baby to a random date I would go on and sorta \"check\" the guy first. To be honest I dont know how about this whole baby thing. I really like her, but I'm not sure if I could handle the baby situation if we would take this any further.", "summary": "Met a girl who has a kid, asked her out on a date and she already wants to bring her baby along. Not sure how I feel about this."}
{"id": "t3_1qcpuu", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (18/M) just got cheated on by my gf (17/F) and now she's seeing him.", "post": "I am a freshman in college and had been dating my girlfriend for thirteen months. She's 17 and a junior in high school in my hometown in CA. I'm off to college in Illinois. Our relationship was going amazing, we had little arguments here and there, but who doesn't? Last Sunday she didn't text me all day, and Sunday night she broke up with me claiming that we should both experience other people. This was unexpected, and being away from all family and friends, I've already been extremely depressed off at college. We didn't talk until Tuesday, I texted her because I was confused about how this all started. This called me and told me that Saturday she got drunk at a party and kissed a guy. I broke down in tears on the phone and decided to hang up and call my mom for advice. I came to the conclusion that I could forgive her and try to get her back, so I told her some story about something I wasn't sure had even happened or not. (I had a dream I was fondling a younger friend of my mom and woke up next to her, so I wasn't sure how much was a dream.) Even after trying to call her down and get her back, she stuck to the idea that we should experience others. This was also fishy to me. I did some detective work and came to the conclusion that she was talking to the guy she cheated on me with. It's been a week, and I'm at college with no friends or ways to get out my stress. I've texted my friends back home, but words are just words and the pain keeps coming back. Advice for a heartbroken kid in college?\n\nEdit1: Forgot to mention that this caused an insane downward spiral of sadness which has caused me to lose 10+ pounds in the last week from a lack of appetite. Any advice for that?", "summary": "SO (17/F) in high school left me (18/M) for another guy after cheating on me with him. I'm off in college without friends and have no activities to get her off my mine. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_2drgf0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do i deal with my[28,M] SO's[24,F] of 4 years seemingly dual personalities?", "post": "I'm having issues dealing with what feels like dual personalities of my SO's based on who we're around. I know this is not a novel issue for couples but its causing me a \nlot of unhappiness. \n\nHome life is characterized by my SO being normal, sweet, loving, fun, and friendly. When out and about together with certain people, she turns into a loud, obnoxious, often \nmean person who just seems to be trying really hard to be someone she's not(or who is she actually then?). This side of her honestly scares me. She's had two emotional(or worse?)\naffairs that I know of and both I \nattribute to this other side of her. We've worked past these for the most part but her 'bad side' is making it really had for me to get over them fully. I can't help but\nfeel that if this other side of her still exists, she's still capable of the lies and cheating from a year ago. When she's like this, I get a pretty overwhelming feeling of\npanic, loss of self esteem, and really feel like I need to get out. Her other side of course comes back and all the good things about our 4 year relationship come back and \nI find I lose all resolve. \n\nI feel trapped in a way. I don't who she'll be at any given time but can't seem to do anything about it because I can't bring myself to lose the girl(good side?) i really do\nlove. The plan was to get engaged this sumemr and married next but this issue continues to hold me back. If i marry her, I don't know who i'm really marrying. \n\nIt's probably insecurities that lead her to act like this around other people i'd guess. I've tried to talk to her about it several times but she gets really defensive and denies this\never happens while she just turns it around on me. \n\nAny advice?", "summary": "SO seems like a different person in certain social situations--one i'm not interested in being with. I don't know who i'll end up with if i marry her."}
{"id": "t3_1ur9ny", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Court payment problem (Didn't know where else to put this)", "post": "I owed a $305 ticket and went to pay it today.  Payed 100 cash and wanted to put the rest on debit.  Gave them my card and they swiped it, and the machine printed out a receipt then they tell me since the card didn't have my name (It's a Bank of America card that has the companies name on it but my paychecks get loaded onto it) since my name wasn't on it they said they couldn't take it, and had to go to an ATM to withdraw money.  Now I go to the ATM but it says I don't have enough even though I did.  So I tell them my story about how they swiped my card and canceled it but now I can't access my money, they tell me I have until the 10th to pay it off but sometimes it can take up to 3 days for this all to clear up.  Would I get any more fines on top of what I owe if I'm late since it's there fault?  They swiped the card and canceled the transaction now I have a $200 thing pending that I can't access.", "summary": "Court swiped my card and canceled the transaction, now the money is pending and can't be with drawled, I owe it by the end of the week and if it isn't unfrozen by then will they add more fees?"}
{"id": "t3_ol9r8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "\"Thank you for your service\"", "post": "When someone thanks me by saying, \"Thank you for your service\" it makes me uncomfortable, as if they had just asked me a personal question I don't quite want to answer. I don't understand why--I cognitively realize they're most likely saying it to acknowledge what we've done, but I never know what to say in response (the socially awkward penguin in me wishes they hadn't said anything). I usually just default to \"Don't mention it\" or if in a more professional scenario, a plain \"You're welcome,\" but that also bothers me (I suppose I feel like that's not a profound enough recognition to something that holds significant weight).\n\nDo other veterans feel this way? Where does the discomfort stem from? Finally, what the hell do you respond with?", "summary": "When someone thanks me by saying \"Thank you for your service\" I become uncomfortable and don't know what to say... Why?"}
{"id": "t3_3zenui", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M], [24m]y friend of 4 years. Cannot remove him out of my life although this friendship is a hell.", "post": "This guy is very controlling, starting from small stuff (like eat your meal this way, not this way) to big stuff (like he decided that my gf is not suitable, and he said that he will stop talking to me as soon as we get married).  \n\nUsually, I stop seeing people I don't like. But this time, I really enjoy his company when he is a tame lamp, on many levels, and I sometimes I think I will not get a better friend. \n\nAlso, he has a phobia of losing people, whenever we go on a trip (like a 3 days trip) and the trip is about to end he gets very moody, and fucks up the whole last day/days.  Also, whenever I decide to cut him off, he freaks out, starts crying, calling me over and over again, gets depression and starts fucking up his carrier.  Then I feel guilty and I start talking to him again.  \n\nThis is not easy for me and this made me waste a lot of time.  whenever he got the chance, he would blame my problems on me.  Not to mention the recent insults.", "summary": "This guy absolutely needs to be out of my life, I just cant do it. what do you think I should do?"}
{"id": "t3_u8s1z", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is it time to break up?", "post": "Alright, here's a little background. My boyfriend [19M] and I [17F] have been dating for almost 6 months. We've known each other all through high school, despite going to different schools. I just graduated high school, and he is going into his second year of college. We were really good friends before we started dating. Since we went to different schools that were about an hour apart, our entire friendship and most of our relationship has been long-distance. We've gotten by and fallen in love via Skype and Facebook for the most part. Everything has been good until the last few weeks. I think I'm out of the 'honeymoon phase' now...but he isn't. He still showers me with affection and romantic letters, messages, and gifts, but I don't reciprocate those feelings as strongly. I care about him, yes, but I don't feel 'fireworks' or anything now. \n\nMy thinking started when I realized that he isn't the person I thought he would be from our online chats. Sure, I still love him, but I think I over-romanticized and over-fantasized about how he would be. What I'm saying is, my expectations were different from reality, and now I'm left feeling disappointed and wondering if I should stay or if we should break up. I should also mention that I will be going to college this fall, in a different college than he's at, which we will still be about 30 minutes apart. I love him, but he's just not someone I see something long-term with. What can I do to either save my relationship or find a way out without compromising too many feelings?", "summary": "Long-distance BF different in person than I expected, but I still fell in love. Feeling disappointed and not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_dd5z6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need help with my speaker set up, help me reddit :)", "post": "So i love my music but im on a budget. Being in grade 12 im saving up for expenses that are going to be placed upon me next year at university. i've managed to get a pretty decent second hand subwoofer and have hooked it to my computer with some unorthodox wiring. the standard pc speakers i use have a connection from the left speaker to the right speaker. the right speaker contains the wolume and tone knobs, the port up the back of the right channel speaker that is supposed to lead to the left channel happens to fit the cord for the sweet subwoofer i salvaged. What i want now is to set up my sound drivers so that the left channel (my subwoofer) only recieves signals that are below 500 hz (the deeper sounds i'd like to be produced) and all other sounds besides them (or all ranges of frequencies) to be played by the right channel. This essentially will give me a mono music experience, but it will make the best use of my subwoofer. I'd like suggestions for different types of programs that i can do this with, i'd prefer that be a global driver so that it automatically works with every sound produced by any program, but i'll accept it just happeneing with my itunes.", "summary": "i want my left channel to only play 500hz and below and all other sounds reserved for my right channel, how do i do this?"}
{"id": "t3_37f05e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is my girlfriend [29, MtF] immature, or am I [26, F] just impatient?", "post": "My girlfriend of 1 year is deeply  ($1xx,xxx) in student debt after graduating from a second degree nursing program. She's relying on her parents for food/rent, and I basically pay for everything fun. It sucks, but I keep telling myself it'll even out when she gets a job.\n\nThe thing is, she seems to be treating life after graduation like a vacation. She sleeps in until 2 every day and I never hear about her studying for the nursing boards (NCLEX) or applying for jobs. She graduated in April and she's only applied to 3.\n\nI had a tendency to nag her about studying while she was in school, and I'm trying to curb that, but it seriously seems like she's not putting in any effort. She doesn't even have an NCLEX date.\n\nMy friends think I should wait to end things until she has a job because so much will change. When her school /work stuff is put aside, we're great. All of my friends and family love her. \n\nShe just sucks at money and self motivation.", "summary": "My girlfriend is taking her time joining the workforce while her parents and I take care of her - am I being impatient?"}
{"id": "t3_2q3gok", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23F) am really freaked out over my SOs (25m) friends cheating", "post": "Hi everyone. I am freaking out and I need some advice/different viewpoints!\n\nI'll start by saying I've been with my SO just shy of 6 months, and it's been really amazing. The best relationship I've ever been in. I think we work really well and I love him very much. However, I have had some shitty shit shit relationships in the past that have left me anxious, untrustworthy and I guess a little sensitive. I found it so hard to start dating again before meeting my SO - it's not been easy for me readjusting to being so vulnerable.\n\nAnyway I'll get to the point... My SO and his mates all went out recently for one of their birthdays and he later tells me how there was a bit of a fight with two of his friends over a girl in this club they were both into. I know his friends by now and that they both have girlfriends. He then tells me how one of them gets with her and fingers her (err) in the club. So my immediate reaction is just.. 'He has a girlfriend?!' And my SO says 'yeah.. But he's just like that'. So I got a little distant and he asks what's up and I just say how I hate it and it disgusts me/upsets me to think about and he gets annoyed saying he isn't like that himself. But I have been so freaked ever since, I do believe he's a good guy. Ive just been cheated on in the past and I'm so terrified it might happen again. It's either that or I'm terrified he isn't the good guy I think he is. I know I need to learn to just trust him, his friends actions don't mean he did or does anything but should I be worried these are the type of guys he hangs out with?\n\nI keep trying to tell myself he's a decent bloke but it always comes up again in the back of my mind especially when they go to hang out.", "summary": "a couple of my SO's friends cheat on their girlfriends when they go out - should I be worried mine does too?"}
{"id": "t3_1mnuld", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Help Relationship Advice! My wife [40/F] and I [37/M] are 10 years into our adventure and it's falllllling to pieces.", "post": "Hey RA.\n\nWifernator and I are at our wits end.\n\nI think most people would have already thrown in the towel, but I/we are glutens for punishment - and more importantly there are little people involved.\n\nThings have been spiralling downwards for the last 5 or so years in all departments, except financial.\n\nTo summarize we are terrible communicators whom each feel that they are pulling more weight than the other, sharing a house with a dead bedroom.\n\nWe both acknowledge that if it was not for the small humans we would have split long ago - but I do feel there is something that we can rekindle here.\n\nThe last time we absolved one another of our misgivings I indicated that it was the last time I was going to do so - but, we did not actually do anything to try and change things.\n\nSo here we stand in that terrible place again, she says that all I did on Sunday was make dinner while she was working her way into martyrdom around the house - I was hurt and retreated to my cave, because words hurt (and how could she not see everything else I did?).\n\nWe've been cloistered for the last few days - waiting for the other to make the next move.\n\nSo, I just sent an offering of absolution in exchange for a serious conversation about what we need to do for our grand finale - because this time is the last time and I mean it......this time...really!\n\nMy idea is to have one another craft a list of what we think is working, what we think is not and to lay out what we expect from one another to MAKE THIS WORK.\n\nIts super anti-romantic but I am going to get this down on actual paper and sign it.\n\nI am sure that I am not the first person to want to draft up this type of contract so that is why I am posting today.", "summary": "Wife and I are in hate/loathe with one-another - Is there a proven process that we can engage to achieve some sort of mutual understanding on paper?"}
{"id": "t3_279uhu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my ex-bf[22M] 2.5 years, started to mend our friendship but just told me he doesnt want to talk because of his own problems", "post": "So my ex broke up with me at a friends wedding because he wasn't ready/wanted to do his own thing (ride motorbikes). I was very sad for a long time because we talked about moving in together and we were pretty serious.\n\nI'm moving overseas soon, so I thought I should get my act together and contact him to get his things back, get mine and leave on good terms... even though he broke my heart.\n\nIn the last few weeks we had some contact, texts and saw each other once in which we talked and had a laugh, but today he said not to contact him because he got demoted, he only has one friend, his parents are moving interstate and told him to move out.. and he's not comfortable with seeing me again before I go. It broke my heart a little more.\n\nWhat should I do? Should i leave him or should I go see him? He still has my things, and I his.", "summary": "ex and I broke up, I am moving overseas and wanted to leave on good terms (and get some things). took a bad turn now unsure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_m569p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Should two people who are in love but who have different futures ahead of them try to make it work? I'm begging you guys, help save this relationship!!", "post": "Repost from /r/relationships because I am asking you guys for your opinion.  What should I do about this?\n\nI am 22(f) and he is 27(m) almost 28. Lets call him X. X and I have been dating for three years. We both come from families with an average income.\n\nRight now I am finishing up at college, but am going to grad school near my hometown (which happens to also be where X lives) for numerous reasons. I am probably one of the most ambitious people I know. I am really set on setting myself up to be successful in the future, and so far, everything is going according to plan for me. I have the connections I need for my chosen field and was even promised a job at my desired work location upon my graduation.\n\nWhats the problem, you ask? He is one of the least ambitious people I have ever met in my entire life. He has a minimal pay job that is unreliable and is living paycheck to paycheck. Absolutely nothing has changed with his situation in the last three years. Yes, there were a few failed attempts at a slightly better job then what he is doing now. But as I said, these were FAILED attempts.\n\nWhen X and I first met, it was all fun and games. I had no idea what I wanted from my future so I wasn't really concerned about him not really doing anything all day everyday. But now that I am beginning to think about a career. I am much younger then X and I am getting started on this NOW. It hurts because I see that he might not be headed in the same direction as I am. This sucks. I love everything about him. Minus this one aspect, which unfortunately is important, our relationship is flawless. We NEVER fight (I can think of only one major argument throughout our relationship).\n\nI don't know what to do. Should I stay or should I go?", "summary": "I am on the road to success and he is content with living paycheck-to-paycheck. Should I stay or should I go?"}
{"id": "t3_tlvth", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Mom Issue -- Trying To Motivate Someone to Improve Their Own Health In Terrible Circumstances", "post": "Hello reddit!\n\nI'm having some relationship issues with my mother. She's the strongest person I've ever met, the fiercest defender when it comes to us kids, her husband and our dad, or even strangers.\n\nBut not when it comes to herself.\n\nMy mom has severe allergies. Like can't leave the house very often type allergies. Trouble breathing, heart beat increasing issues  (not sure of the medical term). She's allergic to about 90% of all edible things on the earth. She's down to salt/pepper/chicken/beef and a few vegetables.\n\nAside from environmental allergies and many chemical sensitivities, she's overweight. Not \"on TV\" amount but to the point where it's having undeniable negative effect on her health.  \n\nI want to do what little exercise she's capable of now.\n\nHer reasons for not being able to are quite understandable. She can go several days doing light exercise (she's never been able to last long enough to do heavier exercises) but then has a period of being sick (hard to breath, feels like shit etc) afterwards. She claims she was being careful and I have no reason to doubt it.\n\nBut I feel like she gave up much too quickly. She needs to do it regardless of how she feels afterwards. She has a work at home job that pays commission based. So if she's sick and can't work, it affects her job negatively. My family's financial resources are quire tight so this makes a real difference. I've offered to cover the difference and help out if it means she'll take risks of feeling bad and do the exercise regardless.\n\nI have a feeling if she sticks with a regular routine for 6 months to a year, she'll be a different person at the end of the journey. But I can't convince her to start to continue.... \n\nShe's honestly tried hard but doesn't have the almost super human level effort that's required to overcome something like this.\n\nWe've had a long talk about this lately and I'm at my wits end on what to do. Any advice?", "summary": "Mom has health issues and has tried many medical solutions to help. I want her to just try improving her general health first (lose weight etc) and I can't seem to motivate. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_qduv6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Debit card fraud, are the police taking our claim seriously?", "post": "My wife and I live just outside of Chicago. She used her debit card (run as credit) at a BK drive through in Chicago this morning and shortly afterward I was getting notified of large transactions I wasn't familiar with. I quickly called my wife who sent me a photo of herself at home with her debit card. We called Chase and verified the transactions were from a card with her numbers and they verified they were swiped in person.We spoke with Chase, were credited with the amounts charged and the card was cancelled and a new one issued. We were also advised to contact the police and file a report. \n\nWe had the amounts of charges, the stores and times they were done, and reprints of the receipts from the stores. We also have the store managers' contact info and we were told they have footage for the registers at the time of the transactions they would provide upon police request. One store manager even remembers the particular transaction at his store.\n\nWe went to the local PD and were set to file the report. As soon as they found out the charges happened in Chicago they told us to go to Chicago. Went back to Chicago to be told that first we needed receipts from the stores for all the fraudulent claims. We managed to actually get those. Then we were told we needed to go back to our local PD because that's where we lived. Local PD said go back to Chicago.\n\nAfter hours of back and forth Chicago finally agreed to take our report but made us use the address of one of the stores in Chicago the card was used at because they wouldn't file a report for us unless we used a Chicago address. They didn't want any of the evidence we have, all they wanted was her name, the times and dates of the transactions and the total amount. In return we were given a report number on a page that had \"deceptive practice\" as the heading and a page about how to obtain a credit report.\n\nIs this going to be investigated and taken seriously? Did Chicago screw us by taking the report? What should we do?", "summary": "Wife's debit card was cloned and used at 3 stores. Cops made us jump through hoops to file a report. Now we wonder if anything is even going to be done."}
{"id": "t3_1z1clv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My Pregnant Friend [24 F] is getting abused by her BF [27M] for the last 6 months. How do I get her help??", "post": "They have been together for 6 months only and I have never met him but recently She has been showing up with bruises all over.  He has pulled her hair out and left marks on her face but she does not want to do anything.  He has been in trouble most of his life and I am afraid this will only lead to more and also scared for the baby when he arrives.  \n\nI live in another city 8 hours away but have friends that are telling me what is going on and no one has done anything as they are afraid of getting involved or having him her hurt even more but I believe ignoring it will do nothing to help her and her baby.", "summary": "I am not sure who to contact or what I can do even if she is not willing to press charges but she is a woman that needs help."}
{"id": "t3_1l8apc", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Why should I even try to help you anymore if you just take your anger out on me", "post": "I want my friend back...\n\nHe has a terrible home-life and just all in all emotionally unstable. When we first started talking, we had a lot of common interests and just like that he and I were Bonnie and Clyde. Over the past two years though, he has ended up going through a lot of stuff and I ended up becoming his punching bag, his dump bucket, his shoulder to cry on.. I mean, at first  it made me think that maybe I was someone who he could share his feelings in confidence and we were getting closer. But before long he ended up having so many...issues. It just ended up being too much. \n\nHe always dumped on me with his problems, and I would do my best to help him with whatever. Nothing like that happened in my case though when I needed help. I would just get a \"that sucks\" \"sorry about that.\" Eventually I began to not share my emotions with him. \n\nWe fought occasionally. At least every other month or so. Usually it was a buildup of emotions on both sides. Something happened at home with him and he took out his anger on somebody. He did things that irked me and I confronted him about it. We would slap a band-aid on it and forget it happened. Finally, he did something to me that was just so unforgivable I couldn't just slap a band-aid and pretend things were okay anymore.\n\nThere were many more problems with our friendship and I just finally have to cut this person off because of this. I don't feel good about it. I should but I don't. I want our friendship to be like it was before, but he's just an angry/sad person and I'm just fed up with having to be his punching bag.", "summary": "I want my friend back, but he has so many personal issues and ends up taking his anger out about these things on me."}
{"id": "t3_1j7u7u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23M] SO [22F] met someone on a month-long trip and has a crush [22M].", "post": "My SO and I have been together for 1.5 years, things are pretty great. We live together, we get along, everything is good. However, at the end of May she went on a month-long trip to China with a study abroad group and met some friends. Specifically, she hung out with her friend from before the trip and this one guy, we'll call him Bill, they met when they got there.\n\nWhen she got back she kept talking about how her friend had a crush on Bill but she thinks Bill is interested in *her*. I got my suspicions and finally came out and asked my SO if he had feelings for her. She says he did. I get mad and ask why he would tell her that while she was in a relationship *and* why she didn't nip it in the bud. She says she thinks Bill and I would be good friends and she didn't want to end a friendship. I say OK and end it at that.\n\nWell, sort of. I notice them texting pretty often - a couple times a day - and I fuck up and snoop through her phone. I  see that she told her best friend that she has a crush on Bill and she gets the \"butterflies\" around him that she doesn't get with me (anymore?). I tell her I snooped through her phone and that was wrong but I know she has a crush.\n\nShe tells me it is just a passing thing and it's normal for relationships, which I understand, but I don't see why she wouldn't tell me. We argue for a while and I say OK as long as you don't see him.\n\nAnyway, I still see his name pop up on her phone all the time when we're together and it makes me really upset. I don't see why she can't understand that it makes me uncomfortable and upset that they're *still* talking after all we've been through about it. I don't know how to bring it up anymore without seeming paranoid or controlling.", "summary": "SO has a crush on guy she met on trip, says nothing will happen but they still talk everyday and I've become really uncomfortable."}
{"id": "t3_1xchzd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25/f] my boyfriend [26/m] of 2 yrs doesnt put out and im having trust issues", "post": "I mean what kind of guy doesnt want sex? I constantly have to initiate,  and even when I do I get shut down the majority of times. We've talked about it many many times and he always says he will try harder but its good for like 2 weeks and then goes back to nothing. Ive asked him to go to the doctor and he says he will but never follows through.\n\nnow for the trust part- I know he looks at reddit gone wild and in the past ive found things- I hacked his reddit account (which i know is shitty of me) and found conversations with many girls who post naked pics.  He posted for a casual encounter, which made us break up last year but we've since gotten back together. i also found fb messages asking to meet with a girl he had a one night stand with before he met me. \n\nI know I shouldnt go looking through his stuff but everytime I do I find something.\nnow im scared to look again in case I do. We've talked about all this and he said he doesnt have a reddit account anymore and doesnt do that stuff anymore but I just cant regain my trust in him. I will always feel like hes emotionally cheating on me. We got back together a year ago and I havent looked at anything since then but im always going to wonder if he is still doing it.", "summary": "I dont know why my bf is searching for something else when im right here practically begging for sex. How do I trust that he isnt emotionally cheating?"}
{"id": "t3_3pywmq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by farting at will", "post": "This TIFU happened literally 5 minutes ago, and there have been mixed emotions in my house...\n\nSo as I was laying on my bed, after eating my mums 3 bean extra spicy chilli, I felt a good hearty fart brewing that could easily be used to start world war 3. I was browsing TIFU at the time and was laughing so much that I had completely forgot about the fart, and it had seemed to go away... Or so I thought.\n\nI quickly hopped into the shower and then suddenly felt the nuclear bomb brewing in my arse, but didn't let rip as I didn't want to turn my shower into a gas chamber, so I held it in till it went away.\n\nOnce I got out I went and laid down on my bed, but dropped my phone, which was plugged into my speakers which were blaring out music. Just then as I perched myself on my hands and knees to reach down and grab my phone, I heard a voice from above tell me this was the right time to unleash havoc from my arse, so as I mustered up the courage to release the fart, I grasped hold of the side of my bed, and let rip.\n\nThis was a fart like none other that I have encountered. It lasted for a good 15-20 seconds and sounded really wet and sloppy but stank so horrendously bad, I had to cover my nose with one hand. As I came round to finishing, I smiled at the work of art I had just created, to then have my gleefulness shattered by a scream.\n\nMy mum had walked in with my washing, hadn't seen I was perched unleashing this shit storm and had walked right behind my arse and got full wind of it. She quickly ran out of the room as soon as I realised what had actually happened...\n\nI had followed through with a literal shot storm, and it had sprayed all over my mum. And now I can no longer look her in the eye", "summary": "I ate spicy chilli, held in almighty, world ending fart for too long, finally released it, and shat all over my poor mum"}
{"id": "t3_3ydaa5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Was I [27 M] just a one-time fling with her [22 F] ? What are signs women only wanted a \"Booty Call\"?", "post": "So a week ago a cute cashier that works at the local gas station gave me her number. We ended up going out on a date for dinner and drinks , had a blast and went back to her place that night and had sex.\n\nWhile we were on the date she actually said she was looking for a boyfriend and something long term , as was I .\n\nNow over the past week she has barely been commucating with me. I usually always try and initiate conversation (over text and calls) first and when she does respond its usually quick and not detailed. Sometimes she wont answer me for several hours at a time.\n\nToday she told me she had a fever and wasn't feeling good at all so I offered to bring her some medicine to help her feel better and she said that would be nice. So I went to her house just to find out she was at work at the time and didn't mention it . I felt like such a jackass . So tell me reddit , was I just a booty call or is she just genuinely taking things (super) slow?", "summary": "Hooked up with girl a week ago that now barely responds when I try and communicate or make contact. Was I just a booty call?"}
{"id": "t3_cutng", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Suggestions needed for the perhaps impossible", "post": "so, I'm a pretty nerdy dude to the extent that over the last few months have pretty much intentionally isolated myself to pursue an intense study in applied math/physics with a bit of computer programming thrown in. While I love to help people out and explain things (heck my awesome job is to teach children), I'm kind of feeling taken advantage of recently (and that it is bullshit that the vast majority of the times I do anything with girls it is under the pretence of them receiving math or programming help). In particular, there is one girl (who is of course hot) and she is in very desperate need of C++ help (received 5 texts, none answered , in the last hour). So here is the rub. I am a normal looking, even slightly muscular dude (I previously wanted to go into fashion design so I feel like I have a decent sense of this), so what are the things that I need to do in order to accommodate both her urgent needs for C++ and the relentless carnal yearnings of the male??\n\n(I am willing to say pretty much anything. I don' t worry about losing a 'friendship' because it is already way too asymettric)", "summary": "My 'friend' only calls me when she needs homework help. How can I use this to stop being her bitch and get into her pants?"}
{"id": "t3_26jzia", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my bf [28 M] of 2.5 years. I blacked out, cheated. Can we fix this? Should we?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have enjoyed 2.5 years together. We've lived together for most of that time. We have a life together--pets, routine, plans, etc. . Of course there have been some minor issues on both sides, but the question at hand is regarding something major I did recently. I went out with a girlfriend. Got drunk to the point of blacking out. I woke up in an ex's bed. The ex says we slept together, but I have no recollection of leaving the bar or anything past that. This is my first and only betrayal of my bf's trust. I immediately told him the following day. We're both reeling from this. I'm scared, regretful, ashamed. He's heartbroken, hurt, and angry. It goes without saying that it was meaningless and won't happen again. I've committed to not drinking to excess again. Do you think this is something that, with time and work, can be forgiven? Can we move past this and be stronger? Or did I just irreparably screw up a good thing? Do you have any insight or advice in particular for either him or me?", "summary": "Otherwise solid relationship. I don't remember cheating. Full of remorse. Can we move on, or is it too late?"}
{"id": "t3_33w563", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] am in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend [20 F]. Together for two, long distance is nearing one. I told her how unhappy I'm getting and that there's a possibility of us not being together", "post": "I told my girlfriend yesterday that our long distance relationship was becoming extremely difficult for me. I suffer from depression and thoughts of self-harm but before she left, she acted as my escape. When I opened up to her, I finally felt like I had someone there for me. I couldn't be happier. But then she decided to leave for a college across the state. I was beyond devastated on the inside. I still congratulated her though and decided to stay together since we are so in love.\n\nUnfortunately, I caved into my depression and cut myself today. After growing so close to her, it's hard for me to spend time with anyone else now. I find it exhausting. I'm seeing a therapist and have been taking meds but nothing seems to work... Self-harm is something I still think about day in and day out. It's only made worse by this feeling of being alone.\n\nTo summarize our conversation yesterday, she just started crying and asked me not leave her. While it's sweet to know that she cares about me, I think she missed my point. This relationship is now furthering my depression... What do I do? I want to be with her but I don't think she knows what to do either...", "summary": "Long distance relationship making me more depressed than I already am. Tried talking to my girlfriend but didn't feel like I got much out of the conversation."}
{"id": "t3_3xsuqc", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "What does she wants to achieve with this behaviour?", "post": "So I(m18)'m at my first date and she(f17) starts talking about weird guys... the date was going quite well, the talk was going smoothly and we're having a good time, but then we got on the topic of weirdness somehow. She starts telling some horrific stories of creepy-weird guys, and how they all comment on her boobs and how badly they want her, how some say they want to rape her because of her beautiful boobs and all. \n\nI didn't really expect any boobtalk tbh, so i wasnt quite sure how respond to this. Obviously I told her that this was worrying and that I was ashamed to be a man because of this. Some men are really disgusting!\n\nWe soon started talking about other things again. But she managed to talk a little more about her boobs a few more times during the evening anyways.\n\nLater on I've been wondering what she really wanted to achieve with this, because honestly it seemed like she was trying to talk a lot about her boobs, and how big they were. Making it the focal point of the conversation. Perhaps to advertise it for me, that this was something she was proud of..?\n\nNow, it's gotta be said that it is indeed true that she has a really nice rack, but I did not feel like complimenting her boobs would fit in in this date. First of: it weird af, as I had barely seen her before. And also, the content of her stories. It sounded like she had had more than enough of boob-loving weird guys. But why did she keep talking about then then, and why is it that her snaps now regularly contains some cleavage?", "summary": "she told me stories about creepy guys who love her boobs and says they would rape her. At the same time it feels like she wants to make it known that she has great boobs."}
{"id": "t3_3zgnxj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with guy I'm dating [25 M] four months - I called him (we've not seen each other in five weeks) and his response was 'I'm watching TV, can you not text me' and hung up. Rude or am I overreacting?", "post": "As title says: \n\nNot seen him in five weeks (partly due to me going away for 2 of those) but have wanted to see him. Have only actually seen each other four times in these four months but we text daily and he keeps saying he's interested. \n\nCalled a couple of times over Christmas (2 or 3) and I got home today and thought I'd call. Arrived back in the same city today so we could meet but he says he wants to go to the gym after work this week so can't meet until Friday. As we've not seen each other in ages I was a bit miffed. \n\nWhen I called his response was 'I'm watching TV, can you not text me' and literally hung up. I don't get wtf this is. That felt really rude but he seems to think I overreact. \n\nAm I crazy or was that rude?", "summary": "Is it rude to answer phone abruptly and hang up like this? You're meant to be 'on best behaviour' and chasing the girl in these early stages or am I mental??"}
{"id": "t3_4ih0b7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (20f) handle people asking about my old self-harm scars?", "post": "I'm doing much better now, but two or three years ago I went through a pretty bad time. I ended up with several relatively light scars on my forearms, belly, and upper thighs. Those ones are usually not noticeable and while some people point them out they're pretty easy to shrug off. However, I also have much deeper scars running up the entirety of my upper arms, and now that it's summer again and I'm going out in tshirts and tank tops, people won't stop asking about them. They're raised and heavy and very obviously self-inflicted. \n\nIt seems like everyone from my boss to my Spanish professor (in front of the whole class, which is what prompted this post) has pointed them out. Some people are nice about it, and of course some are really rude, but it always makes me uncomfortable because I just don't know what to tell them.\n\nI've tried covering the scars with concealer and followed some home remedies to make them less noticeable but nothing has really worked so far. I don't think they're going away any time soon, and I'm in the American south so it would be difficult to spend all summer in long sleeves or sweaters. \n\nI don't want to feel like my scars are something I should be ashamed of for the rest of my life. But I also don't want to be stuck explaining a very personal and painful part of my history to strangers all the time. With little kids I can spin some crazy story and laugh about it, with adults I usually tell them they're just old scars, but some people really won't take the hint. One of my coworkers straight up told me I was just looking for attention after I tried to shrug it off. But I don't want attention or pity or a therapy session with strangers; I just want to be able to wear short sleeves this summer.\n\nI guess I just don't know the etiquette on this. What can I say to people to let them know that while I appreciate their concern, I really don't want to talk about it? Or should I suck it up and stick with long sleeves for now?", "summary": "People won't stop asking about the old scars on my arms. How can I get them to leave me alone without being rude?"}
{"id": "t3_2jwkvx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by cutting my skin with an iPad", "post": "[First Post, so I hope this is good]\n\nUnlike most other TIFU this actually happened today. It was a ordinary day in English Class. The class was preparing to get ready for our next assessment. Now, I had a brain wave. Out of a class of 25, I decided to be the odd one out, and be \"The next gen kid\" and do my assessment on an iPad, and the rest of the class did theirs on pen and paper lol\n\nThe class kept looking at me why I did my work, I think it was just for pure jealously as I had the privilege of using an iPad in class. So to piss them off, I spent a couple of minutes just surfing the web just for the fun of it! I then opened up Keynote and got my work done. I would consider myself to be one of the students to know a lot about Technology, so I flown through my work, while the rest of the class still worked on theirs.\n\nBell Rung for lunch. I get up pretty quickly from my seat, open up the box were the iPads sit and charge, and it happened. I cut myself on my hand.... with an iPad. \n\n[INTERESTING PART] \n\nThe case on the iPad was one of those fully protected one. It was kinda hard, but rubbery edges to protect it. While I was putting it back in the box to charge, the edge of the case must a sliced a bit of my skin off while I put it back... ;( While I walked back to my seat to grab to get my money for lunch, I noticed that the top of my thumb started to bleed. When I turned round to look at the class to line up for Lunch, they looked  at my hand, as it started to bleed quite badly. I couldn't understand how it happened as I felt no pain while I was putting it back.\n\nAll I could hear was how stupid I was for cutting myself... with an iPad \"kappa\" \n\nI'm thankfully okay, and don't need stitches. It was only a slight cut, and it healed in no time. The bleeding stopped, and I was fine and dandy after that :D", "summary": "Mock classmates as I got the privilege to use a iPad in class, only to later find out I cut myself with it."}
{"id": "t3_edpnz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm atheist and have been dating a Jewish girl for two years, thinking about future children makes me wonder if I should end it now.", "post": "I also posted this in r/relationshipadvice\n\nSo I'm in a bit of a conundrum. My girlfriend is amazing in every way, and I have the most fun I can imagine when I'm with her. There is no doubt in my (or her) mind that we have real long-term potential. We mesh perfectly in almost every respect, but one respect in which we don't mesh well is the title of this post.\n\nI'm atheist and she's a reformed Jew. She respects my beliefs and I respect hers completely. The thing is she made it clear to me that if we were to stay together and have children someday that they would be raised Jewish (i.e. go to hebrew school, have a bar/bat mitzvah, etc). She is not willing to budge in this respect\u2013at all. I understand that having children is something far in the future but I feel that if it's not going to work in the future I may as well end it now and have fun with other girls.\n\nI'm not sure if I'm in the wrong being completely opposed to raising my children religiously due to my beliefs (or lack of them), but I just can't stand the idea of them being raised in that way. It may have to do with the fact that I was not raised in a religious fashion, whereas she was raised Jewish by her fairly religious mother (my gf is far less religious than her mother, thankfully).\n\nSorry for the length of this post, but I think it's important to point out that my girlfriend believes in raising Jewish children in order to continue tradition, not because of religious beliefs. She also believes that the network one forms when being raised Jewish is important (i.e. temple connections).\n\nShould I end it now? Or should I just suck it up and realize that raising Jewish children is a totally normal thing and that almost all children are raised religiously?", "summary": "I am crazy in love with my girlfriend, but she insists on raising future children Jewish (i.e. hebrew school, bar/bat mitzvah). She will not compromise. End it now or suck it up?"}
{"id": "t3_ebkmu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So a girl I kinda like has tried to cut off contact with me for no reason that I know of. What should i say to her?", "post": "So this girl and I have a little history together, nothing serious, we knew each other for a little while. Went to a high school dance and we danced the whole night together and kind of hit it off (We never kissed though). Then we kind of lost touch with each other. I don't believe I have done anything to anger her or anything, but I find out today that she has blocked me from accessing her facebook feed and posting to her wall. I kind of like her and would like to talk to her again but am really confused by the fact that she has tried to block me. What should I say to her as I still want to be her friend (at least) and talk to her. \n\nWhat's Reddit's advice on the matter? What should I say since if I message her, she will know, that I know, that she tried to blocked me.", "summary": "I know a girl that I kinda like, we haven't talked in a while, find out today she blocked me on facebook and I don't know why.  What do?"}
{"id": "t3_146w3b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Dating and loving an alcoholic.", "post": "I [24f] have been with an alcoholic [28m] for about 6 months. We have a great relationship and I love him very much. He admitted to me on our second date that he is an alcoholic, and that has never really bothered me.\n\nHis problem started with the loss of a close relative. Since we've been together, he has experienced a decrease in alcohol consumption. Whereas he used to get drunk every night in order to sleep, he now sleeps sober when we're together, or maybe has only 1 or 2 drinks. I spent the last 3 nights with him and he only drank on one of them.\n\nMore to the point though, while he has gone several months with great improvement, he is still very self-deprecating. I feel like he has branded himself, and that is holding him back from seeing his progress. I would love some tips on how I can continue to be supportive of him and show him that he's a great boyfriend. So what tips can you give me for dealing with an alcoholic SO?", "summary": "He's an alcoholic who has been drinking less the longer we've been together, but is still very hard on himself. Can you help me with showing him how great he's been doing?"}
{"id": "t3_twsee", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My boyfriend assaulted me. What do I do?", "post": "This just happened and I'm in a state of embarrassment and shock right now. I have been dating him for almost 2 years now and would consider the relationship to be very serious. I love him he's very sweet at times, but does have issues with anger and communication of which I considered manageable.  But now I don't know what to do. \n\nEarlier we had gotten in an argument (which under comparison was meaningless and stupid), which had to be put aside because we were heading to his families barbeque. His grandmother, aunts and uncles were there and all his cousins. \n\nTowards the end of the bbq all the cousins including him and I went into the basement for a innocent game of Uno. There he made one of his younger cousins; let's name her Natasha (9 years old), cry because how he was accusing her of cheating. So Natasha's older brother, Jayson (18) was sticking up for her. It got heated and my boyfriend (23) and Jayson started fighting. I figured I would let them figure it out until a heard the door break. Head over there and Natasha is crying, Jayson is yelling at my bf who was still getting in Jayson's face. \n\nApparently my bf was choking Jayson. They were separated by Jayson and Natasha's mother. When I tried talking to my bf he was yelling at me. Telling me it's none of my business, while I was telling him to let it go and not go after Jayson while he was being pulled away by his mom. \n\nI admit I was using force to try and stop him, when he pushed me against the wall, in front of the rest of the cousins. \n\nI'm embarrassed. I left with Natasha and Jayson and their mom soon after, leaving my bf there. \n\nHe then messages me this: \nI'm assuming the last message was for the wrong conversation. I havent replied to returned his call yet.", "summary": "boyfriend got in fight with his cousin, I tried to help. He pushed me in front of his family. What do I do now?"}
{"id": "t3_3sxtja", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(UK) Small question about some headphones I bought, hope it's not too small for this sub", "post": "September of last year I bought a pair of apple earpods which come with a 1 year warranty. They stopped working after about 6 months and they gave me a replacement no questions asked. The replacement has now stopped working and they say they can't give me a replacement because the warranty for the *original* pair has now expired. Shouldn't the warranty restart from when I got the replacement pair or are they allowed to do this? In addition to this, they are now asking for a receipt or email which confirms when I bought them (in order to check if the warranty is still valid), even though the 4 other times I've been given a replacement (I got through quite a few) they replaced them no questions asked.", "summary": "If I get a replacement for a pair of headphones, does the warranty restart from when I got the replacement pair or does it remain from the date I bought the first pair?"}
{"id": "t3_r45ei", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "hey reddit! what's the longest time you have been  talking to a fake person or talked to others  pretending to be someone else?", "post": "yes,  i am pretty naive. here is my story:\n\nlike one year ago i was bored,  talking to strangers on omegle. so there was that girl (i should have known there are no girls on omegle), and we had a nice conversation. so after she added me on her facebook, which she just made for me, because she didn't sign up yet (i should have known no person, not even from canada - that's where she claimed to live - that is in the internet has no facebook).\nwell, there was only one picture of her and she never added any other and claimed there aren't any other (not very believable neither - yes i know).\nwell so we have been chatting from time to time. i also chatted with her cousin (suuuuure), who kept emailing me from time to time.\nduring that time she told me always about her fucked up life:\n\nThere was her neighbor girl that slept with her father as a revenge for her breaking up with her ex-boyfriend who was the brother of the neighbor girl (complicated) and a lot of other WTF stories.\n\nWhat made me suspicious was that she mostly came online a couple of days after i ve got an email of her cousin and then always a break for 8 weeks or so.\n\nSo today i was bored and kinda remember my quite good chatfriend and how i was always suspicious so i goggled her facebook picture and BOOM, i end up on various brasilian blogs claiming ppl using that picture are fake (as far as i understand portuguese). \n\nYet, that person was sometimes quite helpful (studying spanish) and we really went on fine and there wasn't anything weird like her asking for money or my address or something alike. So here my questions:\n\n1. Have you also pretend to be someone else? If so, why did you do it and for how long?\n2. Have you been fooled by someone else this way? If so, how did you find out about it?", "summary": "chat with a girl i met on omegle for a year, find her pic on a brasilian blog warning of a fake."}
{"id": "t3_eirvm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I get my mojo back, fellow redditors?", "post": "I am a college freshman and I'm trying to get my confidence back after having it destroyed. A lot of people see me as being shy, but that's not technically true. As a kid I was a natural born extrovert, the rare class clown who also got straight A's. I was born with that kind of lion-esque confidence that some people have.\n\nIn middle school I had that confidence beaten out of me, either with fists or with words. By high school I trusted no one and assumed that everyone was out to get me. While I can now see how stupid that was, I couldn't then. Hating everyone didn't get me many friends, or girlfriends. After I lost my virginity I got a little of that confidence back and started getting with girls pretty regularly, but that didn't last long. After the first ugly breakup with a girl I went right back into a shell.\n\nSo now I'm a freshman at a small community college and it's very hard to meet people. I have a few close friends who I rarely see, I'm in a band, and I can feel that old confidence coming back, but it's coming back very slowly. I would appreciate any advice on speeding up the 'recharging process' and also on meeting new people.", "summary": "Born an extrovert. Bullied into being an introvert. Shit sucked, but I got over it. Gaining confidence back, slowly though. All advice on that and meeting new people appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_312vtk", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIP Cop Edition: TIFU by thinking I was being pranked", "post": "So last night some drunk ass Kevin decided to break into my house and instantly knocked over my kitchen table (bitch broke my toaster oven >:/) and proceeded to leave a trail of skittles through the backyard as he left. My roommate heard all this and called the cops, I was fast asleep in my bed on the opposite side of the house. So I woke up at 3:30 am with an officer shinning a light in my face and asking who I was and if I had been drinking, then two more officers came in my room and started looking in the closet, under the bed, etc. In my sleepy state I somehow put together that it was April 1st and that this must be a prank (Totally within the realm of possibility with my friends) so I started to chuckle and said \"Bullshit!\" and pointed at the cop asking me things. He asked me to step outside in my undies and gave me a field sobriety test and then questioned me some more. Couldn't sleep the rest of the night and then had an early class and a fun story.", "summary": "If you're a cop and you wake someone up on April 1st you should probably tell them that they're not being pranked"}
{"id": "t3_16t31e", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[M/28] Dating a [36/F] - I'm fresh out of a year long relationship and don't want to mess this up. General advice?", "post": "I have been trying to break the habit of getting on Reddit for relationship advice. I really think I'm only questioning myself because of the break up a few months ago.\n\nAnyhow, I met this great girl two weeks ago. She is 36, no kids, no divorces, no baggage. Gorgeous, looks 29-30, at most. We have already gone on one date and it went great. Lots of laughs, touching me, kissed a few times at the end of the night.\n\nShe asked me \"We're going to do this again, right?\" It's clear, SHE IS INTERESTED. I had to go out of town for a work trip this week, we went out on Sunday. I literally left our date and got on the road. I haven't spoke to her all week because i've been working 12 hour days and I'm out of town.\n\nShe isn't big on texting, but she will respond always. She had expected I would be back in town this weekend, now I have to stay here work says.\n\nI don't want to play games, but I don't want anything to be too much too soon. I just don't know what the heck to do. I know I should just be myself, and be sweet(my cousin's advice, who knows her.) It would be too much to ask for her to come to me, it's a 4 hour drive and I've only known her for two weeks.", "summary": "Just starting talking to new girl, she is CLEARLY interested, don't want to mess it up. She is 36, although I don't think the age matters. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_ki3m4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need the wisdom of the collective", "post": "A few weeks ago I went back to school, first time after 2 years. I dropped out because of personal reason. social phobia and as a result depression. Now I met this girl who is my age, she has a few of my classes and we have talked a bit with eachother the last 2 weeks. Now I know she has never had a boyfriend and has a general anxiety disorder where shes still fighting with. I have her number, her phone was broken and she needed to cancel an appointment so I lend her my phone(we actually had to swap simcards since she didnt know the number by heart) and said that she at least should give me her number in return and she did. anyway I really want to ask her out but I have no idea how to do it (forever alone youknow), im averted to asking her over the phone or with an sms since it seems so \"cowardly\" and want to ask her in person. so reddit how should I go about this, how should I ask her out and what would be a good place?", "summary": "boy meets girl in school after a 2 year hiatus, boy is foreveralone and wants to ask girl out. boy asks for help on reddit"}
{"id": "t3_ojeig", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear Reddit, I could use some opinions on a potentially life changing dilemma..", "post": "I went to school for journalism but struggled to break into the industry after graduating in 2009. I freelanced here and there while working dead-end jobs, always for free, until I finally found a good job at a software company about a year ago.\n\nThe software job ended up being pretty great, I get to travel for work, make a decent salary, and love the company I work for as it is very small and has a relaxed atmosphere.\n\nBut it's not journalism, and I don't get to write. As far as my day to day responsibilities go, they are boring and largely not enjoyable. But I thought \"hey I'm lucky to have a good job\" and resigned myself to the fact that this is where my life has taken me and embraced the favorable career path in front of me. It takes up most of my time, which has caused me to mostly stop writing altogether. \n\nThen the other day, I got a phone call out of the blue from the Managing Editor of my local newspaper, asking if I'd like to interview for a staff writer position. I said yes, and have the interview tomorrow.  It is not a glamorous position, but it does get me back into journalism and would give me the opportunity to focus on nothing but writing for the first time in my life. This brings us to the dilemma.\n\nI know that the staff writer position would likely pay significantly less than I'm currently making, so if I do get an offer, I will have to choose between a comfortable and promising career doing something I don't actually enjoy and taking a shot at my life-long dream while making very little money.\n\nI'm not looking for anyone to make my decision here, just looking for additional opinions as I way the pros and cons. Maybe some of you have had to make a similar decision in your own professional lives?", "summary": "What's more important, making a good amount of money at something you don't really enjoy or making very little money taking a shot at the career you always wanted?"}
{"id": "t3_fyzb6", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Fathers and fathers-to-be: Have/do you attended all the midwife appointments with your partner? Am I really \"unusual\" for doing so?", "post": "Hi reddit! I need some advice. I'm wondering if any other fathers have found themselves in this situation..\n\nYesterday me and my very pregnant partner went for a midwife appointment. This will be our second child - our first child is almost 2yrs old, and we chose the same midwife this time as we had before. She was wonderful last time. As with the first time round, I have attended every midwife appointment with my partner as I want to be as involved as possible.\n\nAnyway, yesterday, our midwife pointed out several times that this was very unusual and I was the only father-to-be that had ever attended every appointment for their second child. The underlying tone was that I wasn't very welcome (I wonder if she sees me as an obstacle to being able to care for my partner directly) and that there was no need for me to be there.\n\nAs a father-to-be, I feel very strongly that I want to be as involved as possible in my child's life, both before and after he is born. I also want to be there for my partner during the pregnancy, supporting her all the way. And she feels the same. I thought that this was an attitude to encourage modern men to have!\n\nHave any other fathers (particularly in the UK) out there felt the same? Have you been to all (or most) of the midwife appointments of your second child? Am I really as unusual as our midwife says?", "summary": "Our midwife seems to think that I'm odd for attending every appointment with my pregnant partner for our second child and seemed to suggest that shouldn't come to future appointments. Is this really so odd?"}
{"id": "t3_3kqdst", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting angry at bagels", "post": "Today I woke up late and home alone so I decided to make homemade bagels for the upcoming week. They took awhile to make and I was wanting to do something else, but they turned out really hard and horribly stuck on the pan. dammit. So being me I grab a butter knife to pry them off. \n\nI spent the next couple minutes stabbing the bottom on the pan and cursing aloud, and eating the leftover bits stuck on the pan. Then the door leading into my house (which is right next to the kitchen) opens and my roommate comes in and finds me yelling and frantically tearing the leftovers off the pan and shoving them into my mouth.\n\nHe hasn't come out of his room yet, I don't know what to do", "summary": "Woke up, decided to make next week's snack, my roommate comes into the house to find me going caveman on the leftover bagel pieces on the pan, now feel fat and embarrassed in my ways"}
{"id": "t3_1001tw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20/F) found nude pics of my boyfriend's (21/M) ex-girlfriend on his computer which were sent during our relationship. Should I bring it up?", "post": "x-post from r/askreddit.\n\nI was using my SO's laptop watching some videos and such and happened upon some naked pictures of an ex. They were the kind of pictures you take with Photo Booth on a mac, so it had the date listed as the file name, and it was during a time when we were still dating. I just closed it out and didn't mention anything and stayed on the computer as if nothing happened. The thing is, I wasn't immediately upset or hurt by it. I was kind of just shocked and had one of those \"...oh..\" feelings. I don't know if I'm so shocked that I'm just feeling numb to the fact that my SO basically cheated on me, or actually physically could have because we have a long distance relationship and said ex lives in the same city as him.\n\nGranted, the date on the picture was almost 2 years ago, but we've been dating for 3 years. I was also constantly reassured by him, probably from 5 or 6 months into our relationship, that they weren't speaking anymore, and by the time we went to college (they went to different colleges in the same town, I go to college about 2 hours away) that they had no contact whatsoever. So, should I shrug this off because it was a long time ago, or should I bring it up because it was still during our relationship and I want to know what was going on?\n\nRight now I have no doubt that we are currently completely committed to each other, and it wouldn't even cross my mind that any sort of unfaithful behavior would be taking place right now. I'm just confused, maybe very slightly hurt, and curious about what actually happened during that time. If they had sex then my feelings would instantly turn into anger, but right now I'm just unsure. Do I bring this up, or let it slide?", "summary": "My boyfriend of 3 years has nude pictures on his computer of his ex-girlfriend which were obtained 1 year into our relationship."}
{"id": "t3_4egsjl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17F] with my boyfriend [17M] are starting to have a really weird relationship, help", "post": "I'm in a really messed up situation right now. \n\nMy boyfriend and I had been in a relationship for year and a half. Then he broke up with me because we've had many fights and he just couldn't take it. The next day after the break up I begged him to take me back. He was my first boyfriend and he treated me so well and I was afraid I'm not going to find anyone else who cares about me that much. \n\nWell.. he took me back quite easily but we made up new rules for the relationship because he said he was so anxious and wanted more freedom. I was okay with that. But then at one point I got a feeling he liked being single even though it was just one day. I asked him does he want his freedom to include f*cking other girls or something. He said he is interested to experience another girl in that way. (I was his first and he was mine, we haven't been with anyone else). \n\nWe discussed about that topic for a while and I was so afraid of losing him I said that he can be almost single and hang out with girls more as long as i'm the one he comes to at the end of the day. I was so scared of losing him again and at that point it felt like I have to do anything to get him back.\n\nFew weeks after that I said i'm down for ffm experience and he was excited. Then I asked him does he want my permission to f*ck another girl without me, he said \"yeah xd\u2026.\". I got him back and everything's been fine but now that I have him I'm really anxious about that he wants to experience another girl without me like that\u2026\n\nWhat should I do, I don't know how I feel about this. I want to be with him and I really don't want to break up again, I feel like he's The One. We have such a good time when we're together. And he treats me so well..", "summary": "Boyfriend broke up with me, took me back, now want's to f*ck another girl for experience, what should i do i don't want to lose him"}
{"id": "t3_2lkkbh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] broke up with my girlfriend [F] of 2 and a half years 2 days ago, I always feel sick and I just can't concentrate on anything, I want her back so bad but need advice on how?", "post": "So we were together 2 and a half years, yeah we had a few little problems but everybody does, we went out clubbing last Saturday and I got drunk and a bit insecure/jealous about her talking to another guy most of the night and not me.\n\nBecause I'd had a bit too much drink I made a few comments and we ended up arguing but I thought we had kind of sorted it but it was obvious we had to talk. I thought it was going to be okay but we met up at a pub and we talked about something's and she decided we should spend some time apart.\n\nI know it was kind of my fault I kept saying I would do things but not actually doing them, just things like not managing my money properly, saying I would start driving and I think the main one was that I said quite a few times I would work on my insecurities and that but we would always end up having a talk about it because I made a comment or something.\n\nIt's just really hard and I want to change those things but I want her back so bad, as I said I just haven't been able to do anything these past couple of days, I can't even stand being in my bedroom because of the memories and stuff :/ any advice would be a great help, even on the length of time I should probably leave it before talking to her again?", "summary": "broke up after 2 and a half years, mainly my fault, want her back so bad, want advice on how to go about trying to get her back"}
{"id": "t3_k4tla", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, how much does a college degree define a person?", "post": "I'm an undergraduate studying biology at a tier one university in the US. For most of my life I have wanted to make films and act, but when senior year of high school ended I decided that science was the way to go, since I figured I could just act or write/make films without getting a degree. I have decided to go on to biological research and grad school, but I am wondering how narrow this path will be as the years pass. When I do go to graduate school, will I be completely unable to do the creative things I find enjoyable? I currently have many friends who are film students/actors and I am unsure of how solid my choices were. I am also attending school on loans and might be mostly concerned with paying those back when I graduate anyway.", "summary": "I have chosen a busy and difficult career path and I want to know how limited my choices will be as the years pass. How much does a degree define a person?"}
{"id": "t3_2ry3fj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a [18/F] and my boyfriend [22/M] of 2.5 years can't agree on when to get married?", "post": "Ok so for starters yes I know we are incredibly young, and some of you will probably say to wait and experience more people before making a big decision like marraige. We have been through a lot and love each other very much, we get along well and always talk through everything, and put each others needs before out own. \n\nAnyways we both really want to get married, we feel very confident in this decision and feel like this is the right time to take this new step in our lives together. However he wants to marry me now, and I was thinking about getting married after i get my bachelors degree. I do not feel like he is rushing things in any way but I feel like if i get married at 18 my parents would not approve of me, and I really want to have a wedding where my family won't be upset about my choice to get married so young. Also since I am in college it is a very stressful time and it takes a lot of work and energy and maybe it would be better to plan a wedding when i graduate? \n\nI love him with all my heart and i would completely marry him now but a part of me feels like i'll become a disappointment to my family and be super stressed out (my family doesnt think anyone should get married until they are in their mid twenties and i will be 22 when i graduate with my bachelors degree and he will be 26, which my bf thinks is pointless to wait that long simce we both want this now).", "summary": "Should i follow my heart and marry him now? Or meet my family and boyfriend half way and wait till i am 22?"}
{"id": "t3_1iv5rb", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Being propositioned by a girl I used to hook up with, but there's a catch...", "post": "Hey all,\n\nSo this is my first time posting and it may seem like a silly question to ask, but it stems from a lot of other ?'s that pertain to bigger things in my life.\n\nSo I've been with my girlfriend now for a little over 2 years, we've been on and off throughout the entire relationship, and i've tried my hardest to make things work. While things seem to be improving I'm starting to feel unhappy and a bit unsure of whether or not I want this to continue. I'm tired and have recently started to question where I am in life, and it only fuels whether or not i want to continue this relationship. when we're together things are great but once we're apart we fight a lot. \n\nSo I've decided we take a break so i can figure out what i want.\n\nNow to the question.\n\nI just ran into an old friend of mine who used to work with me a few years back, and we hooked up a couple times (which was great BTW). She's inviting me over tomorrow, for some fun, and i'm considering going over.\n\nthe one catch. She has Herpes :/\n\nwhile i'm clean and have always practiced safe sex, and didn't contract the virus from her, I'm always a bit apprehensive.\n\nThough we're on and off, I'm afraid of going through with this and then the worst happening. especially with my on/off situation.\n\nSoooo what do i do?", "summary": "On a break with the gf, girl i used to hook up with wants to have some fun, but she's got the Herp. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_3lht0g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19F] moving out. My dad is having me pay $200/mo on a paid off car. Would like insight.", "post": "A few weeks ago I told my parents that I am moving out and everything is planned and set up to go. As we were figuring out expenses, my dad told me I'd be paying $200 a month on the paid off car I've been driving since I was 16. Before I go any further, let me make it clear that I did not expect this car for free. My mom actually intended to give it to me as a sort of \"gift\" when I leave because it used to be her car, but then my dad got involved. And he is absolutely pissed that I'm leaving. I think $200 is way too steep for the car. I asked him if he'd be willing to do $150, but nope. \n\nHe said he could provide everything in full if he *wanted* to, but he does not want to help a single thing because he is so upset. I did not expect or even ask to provide for anything, but I still think that he was trying to prove a point by saying that. Among the car there are other things he's unwilling to do like co-sign my student loan, etc. All of these things to prove the point that he's mad. All of these things he also supported my other siblings with when they moved out. \n\nI asked him what the $200 would go towards since the car is paid off and he said that isn't my business. I told him again I would really appreciate it if he would do $150, that is a difference between having a day off for school and whatnot, but nope. \n\nMy question for you, /r/relationships, do you think my dad is being spiteful with this? Should I just go through the trouble to purchase a used car and have no emotional ties to the payment?", "summary": "Dad wants me to pay $200 on a paid off car, claims he doesn't need the money but won't tell me where it's going. I want to pay $150. Would like outside insight. "}
{"id": "t3_4dj1i6", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[Help] What are options helping out our dog agressive dog.", "post": "A couple years ago my wife and I found ourselves bringing home a young pit bull. The previous owner had gone to jail a day the poor dog had been in a crate for a week before anybody had known.  So through a coworker we took her in to live with us and our English pointer.\n\nThe next few months are wonderful.  We find out we are expecting our first child, and the new dog is getting along famously with our other dog, our friends 2 dogs and my in-laws dogs.   While walking down the street we have no issues whenever we meet a strange dog.   All of this changed one Christmas while visiting my wife's parents.  Our pitbull was playing in a bedroom and she bumped into their old blind terrier, who was surprised and snapped at our dog.   This caused a quick fight which I broke up quickly after it started.   Both dogs are physically fine, however this lead to our pit bull to become very agressive to any strange dog she meets.\n\nThis brings us to now.  We love very close to our neighbors,  who many have small dogs.   We also go camping often with family or spend time in a mountain cabin.   Our issue is that while we try to keep any other dog fights from happening, we are worried it's a ticking time bomb.  She has gotten into wrestling matches with my brothers lab, neighbors dachshund and chased a few random dogs while camping.  We take measures to keep these issues from happening such as always keeping a leash on while outside and even using a muzzle if we know another dog will be around.   We are very concerned that eventually another animal or person is going to get hurt and she will be put down.  We would love to try to help out the agressive but cannot afford a trainer.  Also we have considered rehoming her, but are worried about liability issues.  So if anybody has any ideas of what we can do to help out this situation please don't be afraid to let me know.    Also we are in the central utah area if anybody has specific knowledge is help in that area.", "summary": "Have dog agressive pitbull and are looking for help in helping keep her out of trouble or finding somewhere for her to find a safe home."}
{"id": "t3_2bgi84", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I was given an out today....I don't know what to do...", "post": "So my boyfriend of about 2 years is dying from cancer, it's in his lungs, his stomach, intestines, probably his prostate ect. It's literally eating him alive. I knew he was sick when we got together, and we've had a couple of great years, but he had some more scans today because he's been in alot of pain lately. He got bad news, it's overtaken most of one lung and about a quarter of another.... I knew this day was coming, I just didn't think it would be here so quickly... and tonight at dinner he looks at me and says I'd understand if you got up and left me, but do it soon if you're going to, so I can go do things if I want to.  \nI should point out at this point that we're both brutally honest people, and he's a bit older then me, thus has move savings to go and travel. \nPart of me wants to stay because I do love him and I want to be around for him, but at the same time, I know if I'm here he won't go do things he wants to because I don't get alot of vacation time, and he does, but he won't go anywhere without me... and I'm totally okay with him going without me with his friends, I've said this so many times and he still just shrugs it off... Part of me wants to go... and I feel guilty about it, really guilty about it, because I don't think he'd eat if I wasnt here to bother him into eating dinner...I'm afraid he'd die faster without me, which is both a gift and a curse... I'm so conflicted, and a little hurt that he'd actually say something like that. I helped him recover from a cancer surgery... I don't understand men...", "summary": "Boyfriend of 2 years is dying, said he'd understand if I left him, but that I need to do it soon, I feel conflicted..."}
{"id": "t3_5422x1", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[Help] My 10 year old rat terrier is acting different.", "post": "I got my rat terrier (Bella) in 2006, she was about 6 months. My parents got her for a early birthday gift.  This was my first dog, and I was in 6th grade when I got her. Recently she's been acting different. I know she's old, but I read that rat terrier's life expectancy is 17-24 years old on google. She hasn't been to the vet ever, my parents don't have extra money for vet fees and pills for dogs. Other than that she has been a happy lively gal.  Here are some symptoms:\n-Walks slow and responds slow; she barely even does what I tell her to do for a treat like roll over or sit. She just looks at me.\n-she has slipped walking to the kitchen on our tile.\n-She pee's quite frequently on the carpet.\n-She lost most of her front teeth by now and her back molars are rotting. \n-She doesn't run to the door when someone rings the door bell.\n\nI am quite worried about her because she could not make it into the house after a walk this morning, a small step up into the doorway. I am thinking about going to the vet and seeing what's wrong with her this weekend. With my own money, I am a broke college student but I can't bear to see my baby like this. I almost had a panic attack on my way home because my mom didn't come straight home after work. She was left alone. \n\nI've been trying to get outside with her, but shes super slow and just wants to go back inside most of the time.\n\nAlso, I want to have her meals cooked fresh (ground turkey and pumpkin or something like that) because of her lack of teeth.", "summary": "My 10 year old rat terrier is acting slow, bearly eats anything, slips on the tile, doesn't respond to my commands"}
{"id": "t3_1dq26v", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Kittens living in our ceiling - how to encourage them to leave?", "post": "Hi /r/cats. You're my only hope! I don't really have experience with keeping pets so I figure you might be able to help.\n\nA few months ago we've had a neighborhood cat give birth to kittens in our ceiling and they've been living there ever since. Mother cat comes to feed them quite often and the kittens, on the rare occasions when we see them, look quite healthy and happy.\n\nNo-one in the neighborhood owns mother cat and we do have a number of  semi-feral cats in the area. I say semi-feral in that they take care of themselves but don't seem to react badly to humans (I don't know if this is the correct term). After doing some research, the advice is that it's best not to feed the kittens so that they don't form a dependency on humans and learn to hunt their own food. Apparently they'll eventually leave, after which I can board up the crawl-space they used to enter the ceiling.\n\nI'd been fairly content to let them take up lodgings there but the room below is now starting to take on a musky odor which I assume is urine. I also have a young child and was told they can catch all sorts of nasty diseases from unvaccinated cats.\n\nA few obstacles:\n\n* The area where they're living is too narrow for a human to gain access.\n* In my location (country/city), there is no such thing as animal services. One bit of advice I was given was just to poison them, which gives you an idea of the general attitude here. Obviously I'm not interested in that option.\n\nI've tried enticing them out with food as well as putting up cat unfriendly smells (citrus, coffee, and the like). Nothing seems to work.\n\nAny advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!", "summary": "Kittens have taken up residence in our ceiling. No experience with keeping animals and no animal services in the area; it's just me and the internet. How can I encourage them to leave?"}
{"id": "t3_i2723", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My fiancee applied for her dream job and didn't get it.  Weird situation around the whole deal. How can I help cheer her up?", "post": "My fiancee applied for a position at a State Museum that she interned at this past year.  Her intern supervisor suggested that she apply for the position of collections management, so she did.  She received a response back setting up a time for an interview.  We prepared for the interview, mock questions dressed nice etc...My fiancee went in for the interview and found out that the interviewer was her supervisor.  Now here is where it gets odd (imo).  Not a single question was asked during the course of the interview.  Instead the interviewer chose to talk about vacation and summer and small talk kind of things.  At the end of the interview, my fiancee asked her list of prepared questions just to show interest in the job and then asked if the interviewer had any questions for her?  She said no, and my fiancee thanked her and left.  My fiancee sent a follow up email that night too.  A week goes by and it is almost time for the supervisor to make their decision on the position.  My fiancee gets an email asking for a digital copy of her resume. No problem.  The next day, my fiance gets an email explaining that she did not get the position.  Very confused and very depressed about the situation, my fiancee wants to give up trying for her dream job.  How can I help her?\n\nSome extra background about my fiancee..\nShe graduated from college with a double major in History and Archeology this past spring.\nShe will be returning to college this fall to obtain her masters in Museum Studies.\nThe position was for a collections management with a flexible schedule.", "summary": "fiancee had an interview for her dream job, went very oddly, got declined for job and not sure why.  She is depressed.  Whats a good way to help cheer her up?"}
{"id": "t3_3enj79", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to unfreeze the locks on a rental car", "post": "[This story of a guy who FU by calling a locksmith] reminded me of my own TIFU involving a locked car. This happened several years ago but I'm still going to post it...\n\nI had just started traveling for business and I was in some random Midwest state for a 2-day visit with a customer. Fly in, rental car, hotel, customer, dinner, hotel, customer, airport , home. Two things are important to this story: \n* My rental car was a white, two-door Pontiac\n* It was late fall, almost winter, the weather was getting cold and there had been an overnight freeze/frost that hit the area \n\nSo...I wake up the morning of my customer visit and head out to my rental car. Put the key in the lock to unlock it...key won't turn. The first thing I think is \"Great, the lock is frozen.\" Why I thought this, I don't know...but it sets me up for the FU. \n\nI decide that, since the lock is frozen, I'll just unfreeze it. Go back io my room, grab the ice bucket, fill it with hot water. Proceed to dump it on the car window, hoping that it will get on the lock mechanism and warm it up so I can open it. Try keys again. No joy. Go get another bucket of hot water and repeat. Still no joy. \nAs I'm walking out into the parking lot with my 3rd ice bucket full of hot water, I look across the parking lot. \"wow, another white 2-door rental Pontiac. What are the chances?\" \n\nA light bulb goes on. I walk over to the *other* car, stick in my key...VOILA. It opens. I glance around...nothing to do here!...and I skedaddle out of the lot as quickly as I can before anyone sees me.", "summary": "I spent 30 minutes or so dumping hot water on a rental car that wasn't mine, to unfreeze a lock that wasn't frozen. Great move, Einstein."}
{"id": "t3_3yaxhu", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Pulled over for speeding by seemingly aggravated cop in Massachusetts", "post": "Driving back from a breakfast outing I saw an unmarked cop car sitting adjacent to us at the intersection as i prepared to turn left, i pointed to the unmarked car and looked to my girlfriend and said \"thats a subtle one but thats a cop\" My arrow went green and i took the left turn and shortly after i saw the aforementioned unmarked cop make a u-turn into our direction only to see his lights turn on shortly after and get pulled over. The offices, seemingly in plain clothes approached my car and without hesitation shouted at me asking why i was going so fast. I replied saying my car was in neutral and i was gling downhill but i surely wasnt going more that maybe 5 over if anything at all. He replied to me \"No not here back there at the light where you turned left!\" I was confused to say the least and he ripped the license and registration from my hand and went back to his car only to return with a ~$250 ticket for speeding which he basically threw at me before storming off. The ticket stated that i was \"Clocked\" and \"Estimated\" going 57 in a 40 which i definitley was not. I could not have come from 0 mph to 57 mph before taking that left turn in the 1999 car that i drive, not even on a good day could most standard cars do that nor would I do that with a passenger in my car on a major road.", "summary": "I think this cop was aggravated and thought I was being rude or something when i pointed at him when we were at the stop light"}
{"id": "t3_13e0ht", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I need some relationship advice... Like bad", "post": "Hey guys, I need some advice from you.\nAbout three weeks ago I started dating a girl knowing that I don't love her, but that I would give her a chance. I am starting to like her, but I am really unsure about how much, while I am pretty sure she is way more serious about this than I am (I feel like she is already having fantasies about a future with me). I  seem to be the first guy that treats her like a real person, and I am scared that she will be overly attached to the point where she won't let me go if I couldn't handle it. I care for her and I don't wanna break her heart, but I really am scared that she will make me go through a potential horror breakup of her threatening to harm herself or me if it came to that. I simply don't know her well enough to tell. And I feel like I should tell her about my concerns but I don't know how. What should I do?", "summary": "how can I tell a girl that I don't know how far I want to go when she is already thinking of a future together?"}
{"id": "t3_1fskxx", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "I feel my mom treats me and my younger brother differently, looking for explanation.", "post": "I [F25] am the oldest kid in the family with a younger brother who is three years younger than me. Now I have grown up and look back into the past, I feel that my parents, especially my mom, has different treatments to me and my brother. She loves us dearly, I am sure. But I kinda sense that she is more protective of my brother.\nMy mom NEVER guide me throughout my life. She always told me that as a human, I am capable of learning anything on my own. So I learned most of the things on my own, through friends, through reading for example. What's interesting about my mom is, she always criticizes everything I do, like I am never good enough for her. I know that learning  something on my own, without guidance from parents, I won't be perfect for the first time but still, she always says I am never good enough. Like for example, graduated in 4 years with two degrees with 3.7 GPA is not as good as my cousin's achievement. These kind of things cause our relationship to be not as close as between my mom and my brother.\nOn the other hand, my mom never criticizes my brother and is always protective of him. But when there is a problem, even for the smallest one like \"changing facebook setting\", she seeks my help, not my brother's.\nSo for parents out there, could you tell me why my mom is tough on me but still when there is problem she seeks my help not my brother's regardless the fact that she has closer relationship with my brother?", "summary": "My mom is tough on me but not on my brother's but she relies on me more on solving her problems. Why?"}
{"id": "t3_3dpmgg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "4 months post breakup with ex GF (18F) of 4 years. Having mixed feelings.", "post": "You can look back on my other posts for the rest of the story. Long story short, she broke up with me (19M) out of no where. I guess she wanted other things; not sure. Since then, she's gained a whole bunch of weight and seems to have developed anxiety and insecurity issues. I used the breakup as motivation and I am closing in on 40 pounds weight loss (started at 220 beginning of summer, now at 186). I also have talked to other girls and I'm talking to a girl that I really like right now. She is prettier, more animated, and we have a lot more in common. I am totally winning right now, but I'm still feeling lingering effects from the last relationship and it's getting annoying. Anyone have good advice on how to kick these negative feelings once and for all? I think I need a good, physical relationship with someone, if you know what I mean. Its tough being 19 and going without that for months at a time. What do you guys think? Thanks!", "summary": "ex gf broke up with me. I've almost completely moved on but I need advice on how to completely detach. I think a physical relationship is needed..."}
{"id": "t3_fdih7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help: There is a leech/moocher in my lab group. What do I do?", "post": "Long time reddit lurker. First time posting. Throwaway account. I will try to keep this short and concise as possible.\n\nI just started first day of semester yesterday. I'm an undergrad lower senior studying Electrical Engineering. First day in lab course, TA allow us to choose partners; total of 3 per group. Now usually I always partner up with my friends (whom I know won't slack) but they already took the course. So I had to partner up with new people (which I am fine with). I found a group and was looking forward to work together. But then this girl (we happen to know each other) came in late and started sitting with... me. So like, we have 4 people in a group now. Then one of the member volunteered to leave to form another group of 3. I know from experience that she does not do work or contribute in any way form or shape. Her written and spoken English is poor.\n\nRight now I don't know what to do. I could talk to the TA but he doesn't seem to care. Every group have 3 people already. I really hate leechers/moochers. I can't wait to get out to the real world and work in teams who actually... work. Any suggestions? Just suffer it and let her ride along?", "summary": "A leecher/moocher in my lab group of 3. TA doesn't care and other groups have 3 already. What can I do? Just suffer it and let her ride along?"}
{"id": "t3_p5bh0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need advice, I am just not sure anymore", "post": "This is going to be long so be prepared. Me and this girl have been on and off for about 2 and 1/2 years now. And this is our senior year in high school. We have finally been able to make things work and we dont have much time because i am staying in state for college and she is moving up north but i really do love her a lot. but we argue a lot. Over stupid things that I dont mean to do. Like if I dont rush around with her to do things for her. And she says i dont do enough or dont care. But recently she acts like she doesn't want me around. But she will turn around and tell me she does and that she loves me too. But this is her birthday weekend and she is currently mad because i cant afford to buy her gifts for birthday and valentines day and take her on two dates and to a movie and the circus and buy her prom ticket on my part time job paycheck. She claims she isnt mad but i can tell she is. And last weekend we were supposed to go out to eat and she decided she didnt want to. But we hung out anyway. It took four calls for her to answer. While i was there another male friend called her and she answered first time and almost made plans with him but didnt. Then when i asked if i could fill the plans she said she couldnt. And I just told her thats what has been bothering me lately and she is now ignoring me and told me to leave her alone.", "summary": "? My girlfriend can be a bitch at times but i really do love her deep down and she doesnt mean to be. What should i do reddit?"}
{"id": "t3_2l68tv", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Cancelling long-term life insurance. I'm doing the right thing, right?", "post": "So fresh out of college, Northwestern Mutual talked us into a 80-year term life insurance plans for 300k each (wife and I). Premiums were around $70 monthly combined. We since rolled 75k of each into permanent life insurance. Now premiums are in excess of 200 monthly.\n\nSo I'm setting up a meeting to cancel all these and get them into a 30-year term plan with them, largely due to recommendations on this sub. That should free up a lot more budget for me. And I plan to take care of a couple debts with the difference, and eventually start rolling the difference into a RothIRA.\n\nI plan on keeping the 30-year insurance through them. But when I get into a Roth IRA, I'll do that through vangaard or something lower fees. NWM is notorious for getting 5% year on year, and I've seen many other options that yield better interest.\n\nHopefully, in 30 years (I'm 27), I'll be pretty financially set, and I'll either take another term life insurance at a higher rate, or ideally have enough of a retirement account not to have to worry about it.\n\nMy financial advisor there, I'm sure, will be adamant that I'm making a mistake. He already alluded to that in an email. I just want to make sure I'm armed with the right info and am confident in my decision going into it, and I\"m pretty new with all this.\n\nI'm doing the right thing, right?", "summary": "Currently spending a lot in permanent and 80-year term life insurance, and want to cut that all down to 30-year term. Right thing to do?"}
{"id": "t3_4kadl9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (24, female) found email from boyfriend (23) of 6 months responding to a casual encounters ad on Craigslist. The ad was man looking for a man.", "post": "Background info: He and I have been dating for a little over 6 months. Basically fell head over heels, and moved in quickly together. We had plans to move to a new city in August where I will be starting my first year in law school. We have an apartment reserved and everything is taken care of. I have never had any suspicions and he treats me better than anyone I've ever been with. He makes me feel beautiful and worthy of companionship. \n\nA couple of weeks ago he was sent out of state on a short 5 day business trip. He works for a retail company and was helping to set up a new store. \n\nSince his return, he's just been a little off. I felt horrible (and still do) but I did something shitty and went through his phone. \n\nFound out he had responded to a man looking for man casual encounters ad on craigslist. His email sounded very comfortable, as he knew the acronyms and typical format. He sent it the day he got out of town. The man responded 3 days later, to which my boyfriend offered to host. There is no other communication that I could find.\n\nWhen I confronted him, he said that he has no idea why he even responded to the ad. He said he didn't want to actually meet up, but had the urge to talk to someone online only. He claims that what I have read is the only communication he had and that he has never physically cheated on me. He also said that this is the only instance where he was interested in talking to a man sexually. \n\nI have no idea what to do. I love and care about him deeply and I have never connected so easily with anyone. I do not know what to believe and whether what he is saying is bullshit.", "summary": "Caught boyfriend responding to ad for sex with a man while away on business. I am happy for the first time and have no idea whether to work through this or walk way."}
{"id": "t3_3zibe7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need advice on how to ask my [23F] neighbors [20'sM/F] to quiet down", "post": "My upstairs neighbor was very peaceful and quiet until her boyfriend moved in. Now, there are occasionally loud fights. More frequently, however, they are talking very loudly into the night and seemingly moving furniture around/scraping up the floors. (My family owns the building which makes me really thrilled about the obvious floor scraping I hear... but that's neither here nor there.) \n\nNow, I recently found out that an ex-colleague of mine is good friends with the girl living upstairs. The ex-colleague and I are on friendly terms--we sometimes text and catch up on each other's lives. There have been times that I want to text ex-colleague and ask her to check up on her friend after hearing a nasty fight, but I refrain because it's none of my business. Anyway, it's important to me to stay on friendly terms with my ex-colleague because there is a very real chance we will become colleagues again in the next couple of years. I also work in a rather tight knit industry, so it would behoove me to just stay friendly either way.\n\nI know that the upstairs girl knows that we have a mutual friend and would report back if I did anything passive aggressive. I don't like confrontation and honestly, being passive aggressive would be my preferred way to handle this. My ex-colleague is the only reason I haven't taken a broom to the ceiling yet.\n\nSo, I come to you. Is there a diplomatic way to ask my upstairs neighbors to please shut the hell up?", "summary": "My upstairs neighbors are loud but one of them knows an ex-colleague of mine. I want to stay on good terms with ex-colleague especially. Is there a diplomatic way to approach this?"}
{"id": "t3_3v1qjk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 F] with my boyfriend [26 M] have been together for 2 years, love each other very much and plan to marry one day but sex has been becoming more infrequent", "post": "My bf and I have been together for about 2 years, in the beginning we took it slow, physically. Not necessarily on purpose, but because we both lived with our parents and our job schedules made it such that we had little time to get intimate.\n\nWhen we started to get intimate, it was very good. He is the best lover I've ever had. Given our living situation and our work schedules, we only got the opportunity for sex maybe 1x/week, at most 2x/week. He was never a sex-crazed guy who needed it all the time or even more than 1-2x/week. I, in some but not all of my past relationships, was used to sex more often, but in our situation it worked. \n\nOur relationship is really really good. He respects me, is ambitious, has a good job, gets along well with my family, etc etc. The problem is that in the last 6 months maybe, our sex life has really been lacking. Recently it's been 1x/month, and I'm afraid that this will end up ruining what I think is an otherwise perfect relationship. When we do have sex, I enjoy it so much, but I can't say i necessarily feel the need to have sex more often. Maybe that's because I'm so busy that I don't think about sex as much as i used to when I was less busy...\n\nWe both still have very different work schedules, he works evenings and I work days, so we rarely have sex at night. Usually it's in the morning but recently it seems that we are too busy even for that. To put into context, he recently started a new job where the hours are longer and we don't see each other as much.\n\nI am worried that we will lose that intimate part of our relationship, to the point where it'll get more platonic. Before him, i was used to having a lot of sex in a relationship, so even to begin with his lower sex-drive was an adjustment. Has anyone else been in a situation similar to this and can give me advice? did everything turn out okay?", "summary": "Perfect relationship with bf of over 2 years, except sex life has been lacking and I don't want that to ruin the relationship"}
{"id": "t3_1mupkp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21M) am not sure if I'm with my gf (19f) because I love her or because I just don't want to be alone.", "post": "First time posting here, so bear with me.\n\nMy girlfriend and I have had an interesting relationship. First off, it's an online one. We actually met on reddit, which grew to skype and texting. Shoot, we even sleep together with skype voice chat on. Been like this since February. She's great, really. Funny, charming, cute, wicked smart, the whole nine yards. We were planning on meeting up on my birthday about 2 months out. \n\nNow, here's the thing. She has pretty bad anxiety. Like, really really bad. I love her, and I do what I can to be supportive of her as much as I can, but as a long distance boyfriend, there isn't really much I can do. I feel like shit pretty often just cause I feel so helpless. Especially when I'm out doing something fun and she's inches from a panic attack because I can't respond as often. \n\nWe're taking a brief break here this morning because of a rough night, and me just needing a moment. Last night, she had a bad anxiety attack. Like, throwing up bad. She said that she isn't happy in life, but she is happy with me. I... well, dammit. I love her. She's a wonderful girl. But I sincerely just don't know if I wanna be with her, or if I just don't wanna be alone. Like the title says. I sincerely don't know. That's what I told her before we took this little break. \n\nI mean... I want her to be happy! I do! And I know I could be a better boyfriend, try being there for her more and stuff, but I just... dammit I just don't know. I need advice here, please. I don't know to keep things going (Longest I've ever been in a relationship here, like 9 months) Or to just break it off. \n\nHelp, please.", "summary": "Long distance relationship, gf has anxiety, longest I've ever been with a girl, feel like shit I can't help more, unsure to keep things going or break it off. Please read."}
{"id": "t3_2vkby9", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [M 18] Family Hates Bi-Racial Couples, My SO is Latino [F 17]", "post": "I have recently started seeing a Latino girl, named Maria, who almost explicitly speaks Spanish. We met through a mutual friend, and Maria conveyed through our friend that she would like to see me again (a date). \n\nSo we exchanged phone numbers and went on a few dates. We really hit it off, and last week she told me that she would like to be with me in a relationship. With her being a very attractive girl with an amazing personality, I told her I'd love to be exclusive with her. \n\nSo we're getting along amazingly, she's helping me learn Spanish and I'm helping her with English. She hopes to be decently fluent in the next few months for her 18th birthday. \n\nBackground info aside, time for the real problem. I come from the Deep South, and a LOT of my family isn't exactly racist, but they frown upon interracial relationships. Some of the more hardcore members may even \"shun\" me.  My mother (who lives not far from where I am now) is in no way racist, so I'm not worried about that. What about the rest of my family? Maria wants to go with me to stay the weekend in Alabama here soon, but I'm kind of nervous about it.", "summary": "Deep South family doesn't like bi-racial couples, and I happen to be dating a Latina who speaks little English. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2f077r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my live-in ex [22F] together 2 years, broken up 3 months, sleep in same bed. But I know she is seeing other people?", "post": "I will try to keep it short and simple.. My ex was great and we had a pretty good thing going. We even got a lease renting a wonderful house together(we are halfway through the lease). After too much time together we kinda got pulled apart. She said she did not have feelings for me anymore and so on. It really hurt but I tried online dating to talk to new people for a change. \n\nI happened to find her dating profile on multiple sites(one of which is a sugar daddy site, which is concerning in another way). So she used to be gone for days on end, and I just figured it was completely over. \n\nAnd suddenly, she starts being sweet again and initiating sex with me, cooking me meals, etc. Beyond that, she starts calling me old nicknames, and acting like nothing was wrong or something. I know she is actively on dating sites, so she must be meeting people. \n\nMy issue is should I continue to to play along? Is she thinking of \"dating\" me again up against new guys? Or am I just a backup lay? At this point, I never thought she would never want to be with me again, let alone starting being intimate again. I definitely do not want to get my hopes up. But at the same time I do not want to get played like a fool. I cannot bring up her dating people, as it leads to a lot of fighting. Which tells me she is seeing people. However, lately she has been on her phone less, and spending massive amounts of time with me.", "summary": "Ex girlfriend is acting like when we were together, but I am positive she is lying and seeing other people. If I bring it up, a high fight starts. Should I move to the spare room?"}
{"id": "t3_2hbvkx", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Help ! Should I travel through India, South-East Asia or China? I have 3 months to travel, but only a week to decide...", "post": "*I'm trying to decide where to backpack for the next 3 months and I can choose anywhere in or near Asia.* \n\nPlease share any and all recommendations for locations and relevant information for Thailand/Laos/Camb./Viet. and India/Nepal. Thanks !\n\n**Which, given my interests, would you recommend between Thailand/Laos/Camb./Viet. and India/Nepal?** Thanks !\n\nI'm a shoe-string budget traveler intending on sleeping in hostels & couchsurfing. I've backpacked Europe before and traveled in Africa, but never this part of the world. I'm not big into partying, but I'd like a night out here or there.\n\nI **love** learning about cultures & connecting with people of different backgrounds. I love nature & seeing beautiful historic locations. I also enjoy meeting other travelers.\n\n**I want this to be a slow, relaxed trip**. I've done fast-paced trips before, but that's not the intention here. (In terms of budget, I'd like to stay under 3K for the trip). \n\nThank you so much for the advice and the insight everyone !!\n\nI also xposted this on a couple other subs.", "summary": "I'm choosing between traveling Thailand/Laos/Cambodia/Vietnam or traveling India for 3 months in slow adventure."}
{"id": "t3_4gblhf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my [18F] sister, isn't considerate about my past relationships or others, not sure how to address without cutting her out of my life?", "post": "My sister recently came down to visit me in college over the weekend. Long story short, my ex boyfriend (21M) and I have a rollercoaster relationship that should've ended completely a long time ago but whatever reason we still hookup which I agreed to (I'm the one with feelings) as long as I was the only one he was hooking up with. My sister wanted to meet him still though. So we (sister and I) hang out with him and his fraternity this weekend, go drinking, I notice hickeys and as I get more drunk--I get more upset and when we get home, I kind of lock myself in my room to cry for a bit. \n\nNow, my sister is still in high school and I am responsible for her this weekend. So while I'm crying, she decides to head over to my ex-boyfriend's apartment building and go to their pool party and hooks up with this guy who I had told her earlier has a girlfriend (who I know personally). She doesn't tell me where she is, I have to text my ex to find out this information. \n\nHer actions really hurt me because I expected her to be there for me (we are/were? really close) and instead she went to hang out with the person who hurt me and decided to participate in cheating (I guess not actively but she knew). My sister recently got out of her awkward phase and is now super gorgeous, but all the attention sort of went to her head which is I suspect part of the reason why she did all this. What do I do? She hasn't apologized and told me she can't talk to me because she'll say something mean (meanwhile I've been like hysterically crying...rough day). I care about my sister so much and it feels like my life has been full of people I care about hurting me recently. Do I keep her in my life? How do I proceed with this? My family is really tight-knit and I've (sort-of, without some details) told my parents and they say I should just get over it and it was partially my fault for leaving her by herself for an hour while I cried.", "summary": "Sister participates in cheating. Hangs out with ex-boyfriend who hurt me. Honestly, I love her as my sister but I have no idea how to resolve this/deal. Am I overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_2g0scp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26M] with my wife [24F], argument about bringing our son to a BBQ", "post": "My wife and I have been married for 3 years, we have a 1.5 year old son. We live kind of out in the country, about 60-90 minutes from the nearest big city.\n\nWe have friends who live in/near the big city and they kind of complained that they haven't seen us much since we had our son, so we have been trying to make plans with them. We finally worked out that we will come to a BBQ they're hosting this weekend in the early afternoon.\n\nWe had already made plans that day to bring our son to the city for his first haircut. There is a place that specializes in kids cuts and they have a salon for mom too. So it was going to be a special treat for my wife, she is going to get a salon day, our son gets his hair cut, and after we all go to the BBQ.\n\nOk so here is the problem. My friends who are having the BBQ told us that they don't want us to bring our son. They tried to be nice about it but they basically said that they just don't want to be around kids.\n\nMy wife is saying that we should take 2 cars to the salon, and she'll go home with our son instead of coming to the BBQ. That seems like a PITA to me, plus I want her to come out and socialize. She stays home with him and doesn't get out much.\n\nSo I am at a loss here. I think we should tell our friends that if we are coming to the BBQ we are bringing our son. My wife says that's rude and she will skip the BBQ. I see her point but I think I would rather not go if we can't bring him since it will be so much hassle. Plus I work 60+ hour weeks and weekends are my only time with my boy.\n\nWhat is your advice? Sorry if this is a stupid question this is my first time on this forum.", "summary": "Friends don't want us to bring our 1.5 year old to a BBQ, wife says she'll skip the BBQ, I think we all go or none of us go."}
{"id": "t3_2y67ib", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to deal with past insecurities [26, m]", "post": "Hello.  I just have a question about some insecurities that are cropping up and how to deal with this as time goes on in my life.\n\nI'm a 26 year old male who has been single for the past year.  I've been enjoying my time but the past few times I've started dating a woman these insecurities from the past start kicking in.\n\nThe biggest insecurity I have is that my last serious relationship (4+ years) ended primarily due to me having to move back in with my parents.  I was 24 at the time and had to go back to school for an internship with a company.  I'm currently 6 months in my new position making $30,000 / year with a good outlook for a raise soon.... but I'm still stuck at my parents place.  The girl at the time soon left me for someone else shortly after that, and gave the \"I don't know what to tell you, it's not you it's me, etc etc..\".  There is certain evidence that this wasn't the case that I discovered later and I believe it had more to do with finances.\n\nSo now that I'm on my way up, how do I stop fearing this kind of occurrence from happening?  I feel as if I'm less of a person due to the amount of money I'm currently making and though I do have plans to move soon I feel like my whole dating life is currently on hold until I become more financially stable.  Any advice on this?  I feel like I don't even want to enter the dating soon out of fear of being laughed at for how much money I make.  I don't have any other real issues affecting my confidence like this.", "summary": "26[M], How to deal with past insecurities of not making enough money currently / currently living with my parents."}
{"id": "t3_3cx4xl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16M] told my gf [16F] something serious and know I don't know what to do.", "post": "I know I'm a little young to post here but I really need some quick advice and I'm struggling a little with my sanity.\n\nSo I've only been dating my current gf for 3 weeks but we have been best friends for a year and would have gone out months ago if not for the two months of exams we have in the UK. \n\nSo anyway, about a year ago, I was diagnosed with a nasty illness and it caused me to lose lots of weight (I was already underweight) but also in some way or another, made me very sad and at one point depressed. After beating the illness with short stints in hospital, I still struggle with happiness now and again.\n\nFast forward to last night, when I had my first argument with my gf. It was my fault as I wasn't in the best place but no one outside of my direct family knew about my issues with mental health. I knew I had to tell me gf and I did; but in a stupid Facebook message and not in person because I live too far away to walk and to be honest, I was scared. Now she knows and is angry that I didn't tell her straight away, I don't know if I should say anything after having a brief conversation on Facebook; mainly making sure I wasn't self harming or anything like that. \n\nHowever, she does know that my first relationship ended because my ex gf was cutting herself and I ,again , was scared. I really don't want to break up with her but I know what it's like to be with someone who is hurting seriously. I just want her to know she can break up with me without her feeling remorse; having told her I feel like I've trapped her in a relationship. \n\nI guess what I'm asking is, what should I do now and is there anything i can do make sure she is ok? I know teenrelationships is a thing but I need an adult and quick answer. Thanks for taking the time to read all this.", "summary": "Told my gf about my past struggles with mental health, I've upset her and need to fix things in a way that's best for her."}
{"id": "t3_v48gc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need advise - relationship going stale?", "post": "Me: 21 M, Her: 21 F, Relationship: 6 Months\n\nHey all, just wanted a bit of advise as I'm really not sure what's up really. Lately things have been feeling like they've been going a bit stale. I'll keep this short and sweet.\n\nFor about a month we didn't see each other much. First she was sick, then I was sick, then I was bombarded with the last couple of stressful weeks of university trying to get all my work in on time. This was when things started to feel off, naturally, as we went from seeing each other at least every other day to seeing each other once a week if we were lucky.\n\nNow that we're getting to see each other more (it's been about 2 weeks of this now) it's been feeling stale, mainly when we're together at my house watching a movie or the usual activities of derping around the house doing stuff. When we're out with friends or out doing something together everything is amazing and feels great, it's just when we're sitting together in my house. Maybe I'm just sick of sitting around my house after the amounts of uni work I had to do while sitting stressing out for weeks?\n\nAnyways, I don't want to break up with her because I know that I still love her. Yeah, 6 months may seem to soon to be saying the \"L\" word to some people (by the way it's mutual and we've both said it), but I don't ever expect people to understand my own relationships when they're not the one involved in them.\n\nSo yeah, I was just wondering if anyone here has any advise or insight as to what is going on. Am I just in a rut? Am I being an idiot? She's an amazing girl and I've never been happier in a relationship.", "summary": "Relationship feels stale, may be in rut, need advice on what is wrong and how to personally work on things as it's only my problem really."}
{"id": "t3_2viax5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[18 M]with my girlfriend [17F] 1 month Not sure what just happened to my relationship", "post": "i am a senior in high school and I have been dating a junior for almost 2 months now. she is the first person I have ever dated for real and she was also my first kiss. But recently she told me that she doesn't know if she still wants to be In a relationship. I made the mistake of asking her to be official only after 3 dates and we haven't even been able to see eachother since. \n\nWe talked on the phone about our relationship toget and she told me that she still liked me but that she doesn't think she wants a relationship right now Because she has things going on in her life that she didn't want to tell me about. I still really care for this girl but I'm unsure of what she wants. We didn't official break up but she did say she didn't want a relationship but we can still talk. She told me she wouldn't be talking to other guys so I told her I wouldn't be talking to other girls. I'm unsure of if she wants us to go back to normal before we became \"official\" like back to just talking and going on dates or if she really wants me to leave her alone for a while. I don't want her to lead me on to wait for something that will never happen. I'm not sure what to do because I still care for this girl and I don't want to lose her. \n\nAlso I already bought her a box of chocolates and a card for Valentine's Day...should I still give it to her?\n\nIf I left something out or if this story didn't really make any since please let me know. I'm new to making posts on reddit", "summary": "I'm unsure what to call my relationship and I don't know if I should keep talking to this girl and to just leave her alone."}
{"id": "t3_2ep6qk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[15 M] I'm about to come out to my parents and sister on my upcoming sixteenth birthday, but it's a little complicated", "post": "Hi! You probably don't remember me [from this thread in /r/relationships about a year ago.] I'm the same guy. Basically, I asked for advice on how to come out to my best friend. Now, I'm coming out to the world. But before that, I have to tell my family, who I'm really close with. \n\n---\n\n**UNIMPORTANT SIDENOTE**\n--\n\nI decided that the age 16 is exactly when I want to come out. It's the year after Freshman year in high school, so I'm already settled in. Plus, it's the year I can start driving. It's also the fourth power of two, and a perfect square itself. Being slightly obsessive-compulsive, and a math nut, it's really a perfect, round age to come out at. Also, I feel much more comfortable with my parents now than I ever have before. It took some remedial therapy to get them to soften up to gays a bit (watching media with LGBT+ representation). That meant sneaking Modern Family into the DVR.\n\n---\n\nAnyway. I think my family may have guessed by my \"abnormalities\" (read: noncompliance to generic teenage masculinity) that I might not be completely heterosexual. I also know that my sister snooped through some of my texts with one of my friends that hints at me liking boys. That's a separate problem, but nonetheless, they may already know about me being gay.", "summary": "If you're a used-to-be-homophobe parent out on their son's 16th birthday in New York, what should he say to come out to you, and what shouldn't he?"}
{"id": "t3_2pr6gj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So me (18m) want to express feelings to a crush (16f)", "post": "So I'll start out saying that I recently met this girl and I'm usually pretty shy, we're only together for about 55 minutes a day (math group) and I seem to be interested in her personality, which she doesn't seem to express much, but since I'm the same way, maybe we could connect in a very similar way... \n\nI used to think this was just a small crush that would easily pass, but every day I talk to her I seem to get more and more attracted, and since I haven't really had much experience in the relationship field, maybe I can get some opinions on how to take a crack at this...", "summary": "I recently met a girl in math class who I'm interested in, New to this and don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2wm3af", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [24/f] with my LDR boyfriend [24m] and just want to know how to deal?", "post": "I think I just need to rant and am being over emotional but here it goes......\n\nWe've been together for three years and everything is great when together except when we are apart and it's my fault. Growing up my parents never really allowed me do stuff normal kids did and we always were moving until 3rd grade. I always made friends but I wasn't allowed to go out with them or have sleep overs etc...It wasn't until senior year of high school where I was given freedom. \n\nNow, in college, I've adopted the same friend habits and it sucks(not saying I want sleep overs). I don't really have any friends except two good ones. One never feels like hanging out (in fact just got a text saying \"eh, no thanks\") and the other lives on the other side of the country. So most of my days are spent studying, stuck in my room, gaming,school, or going alone to a bar street located right off campus. What does this have to do with my relationship?\n\n My boyfriend lived in a small town where everyone knows everyone. He has friends, since elementary, everywhere and is always doing something with different people. This makes me feel happy for him because well, he's got people to be with and that's great but on the other hand I get sad and sort of jealous that I am not as privileged to have a circle of my own that I can just turn to and automatically hang with.\n\n I'm already stuck alone most the time. So it is only when he goes out that I start to feel like crap. I try and occupy my time with hobbies but it just gets old after a while. He does his best to keep time for me and I appreciate it. He's literally the best boyfriend I could ask for but how do I deal with the loneliness? I have brought it up but there isn't much he can do and if I keep bringing it up I'll push him away.", "summary": "how do you deal with the loneliness in an LDR when you've got not as many friends as they have to occupy their time with? I'm starting to feel like a scrappy girlfriend for it."}
{"id": "t3_30n6hj", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by putting some coca-cola in a water bottle", "post": "Tonight I decided I was going to stay up late so I could catch up on some TV shows and watch a couple of movies. \n\nI went to the kitchen to get the food and drink I wanted to take to my room so I wouldn't have to walk through the house during the night and take the risk of waking anyone up. I found a big bottle of cola in the fridge and decided to fill up a smaller bottle (the bottle can hold more than any of the glasses I have in my house). \n\nAfter playing some video games, I decided to settle down and start up the first movie. About 10 minutes into the movie I heard this noise, just like when you open a bottle of cola and the gases release but it was continuous, so I pause it and go investigate. At first I couldn't quite work out what it was and started to get paranoid (I don't know why, I just did). I started looking around my room to find the source of the strange noise. I checked my xbox, because I thought it could have been the fan, I checked my PC to see if it was turned off, I checked the window to see if it was closed properly, but everything was ok.\n\nAll of a sudden I heard this POP behind me and nearly had a heart attack. I turned around and saw that the lid of the bottle had popped off. I guess it was the gases in the cola which had expanded the bottle causing the lid to pop off. This happened about 10 minutes ago and my heart is still beating really fast.\n\nNote to everyone: If you're thinking of putting coca-cola in a bottle, don't screw on the lid!", "summary": "Put coca-cola in a bottle and screwed on the lid, gases built up and popped the lid off, nearly giving me a heart attack."}
{"id": "t3_3idvi9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Tifu by walking into the wrong room at work.", "post": "Obligatory, it didn't happen today (but around a month ago) and I am not a morning person. \n\nInterning at a company. One month in I had a meeting with my boss and his boss. We were to meet at 7 am. I usually get into work at 8:30 so 7 am was early for me (specially cause it's a 1 hour drive)\n\nI get to work at 6:50 and see my boss and he said go ahead into his boss's room (since he will be in the meeting late). I'm super tired and I walk into the room and wait. No one is in this room. 10 minutes pass, 20 minutes pass, and then 4 people walk in and I'm like finally (I have never met my boss's boss) and they all sit down and start discussing some project that makes no sense to me -- definitely not the project I was assigned. And I'm completely flabbergasted. I sat in that room for one and a half hours confused as hell.\n\nFinally the meeting ends and everyone starts asking me who I am, and I explain and then they tell me I got the wrong room. Completely embarrassed I leave and see my boss and his boss leaving the adjacent room. They ask where I was and I explain my story and they just laughed and said that I'll have a one on one meeting later this week since I missed the original meeting \n\nKept my job, looked like a dumbass, all in a good day's work. It's been over a month and everyone in our department constantly remind me of this whenever I go into conference rooms or meetings.", "summary": "I walked into the wrong meeting room and wasted 1.5 hours, while the meeting I was supposed to be in was done without me. Everyone makes fun of me still."}
{"id": "t3_1u5hvy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [34/F] considering contacting the woman my husband [34/M] is cheating with. Is this a good or bad idea? Has anyone else in this situation ever contacted the OW/OM? If so how did it go?", "post": "I made a [previous post] about my situation but tonight I found out my husband's \"friend\" is also making a new start so basically they're both leaving their spouses for each other. \n\nI decided I'd like to talk to her and not only get some answers but also let her know a few things like how my husband was treated for an STD (I'm clean so I didn't give it to him). For all I know she gave it to him but in case he didn't I think she should know. I'd also like to let her know about the texts he sent me awhile back saying he loved me and wanted to reconcile (Obviously these were lies or he changed his mind) because it goes to show his shady character. She has a kid and as angry as I am, I don't want her kid to get attached to them in the event that she discovers he's truly an asshole and breaks it off with him.\n\nI won't lie though, a little part of me wants to send it as a way of telling her I know what's going on but none of the letter is angry, harassment, blame, etc. It's pretty calm and sort of non-judgemental. So /r/relationship, does this seem like a good or bad idea? \n\nDo you have any advice for me on how I should handle this situation? I'm going crazy not having any closure.", "summary": "Want to contact the OW in the politest way possible but not sure if this is a batshit thing to do."}
{"id": "t3_2uqupc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my foreigner ex [28 M] 3 mos. I'm still enamoured", "post": "So for 3 months, my head was filled love and all that relationship stuff. \n\nThe thing is, for me he was just a casual friend who I occasionally hooked up with. For him, I was the \"girlfriend\". I was almost always flattered. \n\nBut who would be? When all we did was get a taxi, book a motel and do it in less than 3 hours for 2 or more sessions! I mean that was all meaningless sex. However, he kept telling me that if he didn't love me, he wouldn't have had sex with me.\n\nBut I've been asking around. And I was right. He wasn't my boyfriend at all. I mean, he never took me out to dinner. He never held my hand. He never really introduced me to his friends. My heart was controlling my every move. Including the other parts. If you know what I mean. ;)\n\nFirst week passed, met with my ex-fubu. You know what would have happened there right. Eventually, his roommate caught my eye. I'm the type of person who says never say never. So I did it with his roomie/bff. Twice. After a month, you could say I did it again. \n\nRight on Christmas vacation. I found out he gave himself such a trashy gift. His new girl. Also he really loves the girl and did things for her which I kept telling him but he didn't do for me.\n\nI was \"stalking\" him on different social media accounts. I guess you can say I cried. Cause he never did those things for me.", "summary": "Anyway, in summary, I know he'll never take me back, but assume if he will: if you were me, what would you do to take him back?"}
{"id": "t3_3n12cq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [33F] tell my completely dependent fiancee [38F] of two years that I need her to move out?", "post": "Me [33F], her [38F]\u2026 together 2 years, engaged for the last 10 months.\n\nI have to break up with her. I'm not happy, I feel used and I feel like I'm her parent. \n\nShe doesn't work at the moment. These moments happen often, she's had at least 8 jobs in the two years we've been together. I pretty much have to ask her to clean the apartment while I'm at work. Just the other day she waited for me to get home from work so I could help her do the laundry.\n\nShe doesn't physically take care of herself. She eats like crap. She has gained 30lbs in two years. I have to ask her to shave her legs and armpits. \n\nThe last thing is that I am having an extremely hard time staying sober with her. I'm an addict; coke, weed, alcohol. I worked extremely hard to get my life together. She does not do drugs and drinks socially. All her friends are heavily into drinking and also into coke. They are always trying to buy me drinks and taking about drugs. I slipped up last week and did coke for a few days. This isn't what I want for my life!\n\nIt's not working.\nThe problem is that she is completely dependant on me. She could never afford rent on her own and this would basically force her to move back in with her parents.\nI feel like such crap. I pursued her hard. I asked her to move in with me and I asked her to marry me. I believe this will be completely blind side her.\nI know I made her sound bad in this but I really do love her, I just can't be with her.\n\nWhat should I tell her? I don't want to list all the reasons I don't want to be with her, that will just cause unnecessary hurt but I really need her to understand I want to break up. Basically I need help breaking up but without hurting her too badly.", "summary": "I financially support my fiancee and am being taken advantage of. Need to break up but don't want to hurt her."}
{"id": "t3_4f4ct5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16 M] like my prom date [16 F], but can't tell if she likes me or is just going to prom with me.", "post": "First off, I haven't known this girl for that long. I asked her to prom and she said yes and we have been texting and snap chatting, but I can't tell if she likes me or is just dealing with me.\n\nShes told her friends that I'm cute and my friends hooked me up with her. Her snapchatts are usually half of her face or her w/ her friends. She also sent me a snap chat of her in the bath today (just legs). Through text she asks me a lot of questing and used plenty of emojis. She hasn't responded to my snapchat for 4 hours now, which is unusual, but I think I'm overthinking that.", "summary": "Like my prom date, can't tell if she likes me the same, has given me some signs. Am I just crazy?"}
{"id": "t3_2oios3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] and close friend [20F] have hooked up a few times, developed feelings for one another but she is unsure if she wants to commit", "post": "Me and my friend go way back, around 8-9 years or so, last year I lost my virginity to her as a drunken one night stand.  We keep being friends and get past all that, I had a brief relationship and so did she. the same thing happened a few months ago too and we hooked up again. This time however we are quite open and flirty with each other over Skype/texts etc (she lives in a different city to me)\n\nLast week we admitted that we had feelings for each other.  She hooks up with a lot of guys as one night stands and that's all cool and fine but she says that she doesn't know if she could commit to a long distance relationship. Because we have been incredibly close friends for quite a long time we decided that she should visit me in January (she is off on a work expedition for a month) and see how it goes. We've booked tickets and everything and I'm super pumped but I still have a little niggle. \n\nShe's clearly open to the idea of being in a relationship with me but still has reservations whereas I am falling for her kinda hard. What should I do?", "summary": "Close friends with 20F for years, we had sex a few times and have feelings for each other, live in different cities and she is unsure if she wants to commit but I am getting stronger feelings for her"}
{"id": "t3_epyon", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Advice on getting renovation plans approved by the town? Is bribery an option?", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nI live in a town that can be pretty strict when it comes to home renovation regulations. The second floor of our bungalo was finished when we moved in, but poorly. We wanted to add a bathroom, two dormers, and insulate it properly to make it a master suite with some closet space.\n\nOur contractor, however, is afraid that the township may want us to upgrade our floor joists from 12x6's to 12x10's. If we have to upgrade the flooring, it makes the job exponentially more expensive and time consuming -- possibly out of our price range. But without these renovations, our house just isn't big enough for us and we're liable to lose money on a sale. \n\nSo the contractor and I are drawing up some plans and we plan on submitting them to the town sometime after christmas. We're not asking about the floors because we don't want to raise any red flags -- we're just hoping to slip through and get approval. \n\nSo does anyone have any advice on who to talk to, beg, or bribe if we don't get approval? Has anyone ever had any luck lawyering their way out of this sort of thing? What are my options?", "summary": "I want to renovate my second floor without having to bolster the floors. How can I get the township to approve?"}
{"id": "t3_2q1c23", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "When applying for jobs, is it OK to say I was hired as a temp. worker when really I was let go before probationary period ended?", "post": "I wouldn't think to put it on my resume except the experience is extremely relevant for my field. I imagine I will end up talking to my future employer/interviewer about certain experiences that I had and knowledge that I gained from this past job. I actually loved the job and wish that it had worked out better.\n\nUnfortunately, I was essentially set up for failure - it was a sink-or-swim type training where management was largely uninvolved. Any sort of outline of job duties/ time management/ expectations were \"in the process of being organized\" and there were several different supervisory personnel who all had conflicting advice/directions on how to do the job. If I asked a question, I was criticized for not knowing already. If I did things without asking questions and tried to figure it out, I was criticized for not doing things a certain way. Finally, the other employees always cut corners and did crap work in order to finish on time. I have a hard time leaving work without my job being done so I would regularly stay later than others not only because I was actually completing my duties but also because I was completing things that others wouldn't finish.", "summary": "I was fired because I didn't work as fast as other employees and I was having a hard time learning how things work (chaos). "}
{"id": "t3_2ctwsz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Unhappy at work, possibly quitting, will need to negotiate a raise and some changes. How do I approach this with my boss?", "post": "Things at work have gotten insane and I just don't like they way many things have been handled. This is a corporate IT job at a Fortune 250 company. My senior developer quit a few weeks ago and I was offered the position, but things have been so insane lately we haven't had time to discuss details. *I'm now solely responsible for a massive, mission-critical application* and that has brought on a lot of anxiety. They need me, and I really don't want to abandon them.\n\nWe'll be discussing things either tomorrow or next week. I'm not sure what to do here. I'm very unhappy and am pretty sure all the extra responsibility will not help. If they were to offer me a shit ton of money/extras, I'd *consider* waiting it out on the condition that several things change.", "summary": "How do I best communicate with my boss that I'm unhappy, on the verge of quitting, but am willing to stay if they offer me a shit ton of money and some things change?"}
{"id": "t3_3debt5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[22F] going on a second date with a woman [28F] in an open relationship", "post": "I went on a date with this insanely beautiful, intelligent, funny, overall amazing woman a few weeks ago. It went really well, and I liked her a lot. She told me from the start that she was married and in an open relationship, and I wasn't phased by that really. I think that I didn't care because I hadn't fully thought through what it would mean to \"date\" someone in an open relationship. \n\nSo now that I'm about to go on a second date with her, I'm freaking out a little about how I'm expected to act. Do I treat her like any other girl I'd date and say cute things and let myself have feelings for her? Or do I try to avoid that and treat it as a sexual relationship only? On the first date, we ended up making out a lot, and I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to invite her back to my place or whether it was too soon, so I said goodnight. I guess this time I invite her back? And then it's just sexual from here out? I've had meaningless sex with guys and that's easy enough, but I'm worried I might not be able to separate feelings with a girl, because they make my heart go pitter patter. Any insight?", "summary": "Not sure what I'm getting myself into dating a woman in an open relationship. Is it just about sex? Do I assume all interactions are more or less booty calls?"}
{"id": "t3_39v7g8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to tell my current S/O (m30) that I (f27) want to meet up with my ex?", "post": "I (f28) love my boyfriend (m30) of 18 months and we plan to get married. I know i want to spend the rest of my life with him. There is no doubt in my mind. But because of where I work, there is a chance I may run into my ex (m29) that I once had very strong feelongs for. I actually want to talk to him to clear some air that was left foggy when we ended things 2 yrs ago. I think talking to him and getting something off my chest would officially allow me to move forward in my current relationship. But I don't know how to bring it up to my boyfriend. Part of me thinks he will understand if I tell him and he will appreciate me being honest with him because that is how he is. But I'm also worried he'd be upset and that's the last thing I want.", "summary": "what is the best way to approach this situation? Do I confront my ex or am I setting myself up for a mess?"}
{"id": "t3_3w8vb9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Just found out my(18M) GF (17F) of 2 years sent nudes to her FRIEND and never told me during our relationship", "post": "Just to be clear, this happened BEFORE our relationship. So basically she told me that she dated her friend a bit before our relation, but never told me she sent him nudes and she still had phone number saved. When I asked her to delete it, she hesitated to delete her number when I told her too but she eventually did after I forced her too. She said she dated her friend but they were platonic (not physical) until today after 2 years I just found out from her friend that she sent him nudes (so probably were physical too) and he even showed me the nudes. What makes me mad is the fact she never thought to mention this during our relationship.", "summary": "Gf of 2 years was dating this friend of her before relation who she sent nudes too but never told me. Just found out today by myself, what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_17emu5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My gf [27] got mad at me [29] because I haven't commented on how she's gained weight?", "post": "So this is a new one for me!  My girlfriend and I have been together 3 years.  In the last year, she has gained a lot of weight, probably 30 pounds.  I've definitely noticed both the weight, and the fact that she feels negatively about her body now - she won't wear tighter clothes any longer, and she makes comments sometimes about how she feels unattractive.  For my part, I haven't commented on her weight, but I've tried to sympathized, and involve her in exercise and things that I do.  She's usually pretty eager to participate, and she has started trying to lose weight!\n\nAnyway, last night she got angry with me that I've never commented on how she's gained weight.  She even asked if I'd noticed!  I mean, I haven't done so in so many words \"hey babe, looks like you gained some weight, thought about losing it?\" but I have definitely tried to eat healthier with her and exercise more.  To be honest, I thought I was totally nailing the supportive boyfriend role, but I guess not?  \n\nCould someone help me interpret what could be doing on here??", "summary": "gf is annoyed I haven't commented on her weight gain, however I have been supportive in other ways - what's going on?"}
{"id": "t3_ef89w", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My judgment and decision making abilities seem to be seriously on the decline.  I'm in my early thirties.  Should I be worried?", "post": "While others around me call me a genius, I feel like an idiot all the time because I am constantly making mistakes in huge areas that affect my life.  Example: I'm currently jobless, after having quit a very high paying job to move to a new state, and have now spent thru most of the available cash on hand - a known risk, but made bigger by lots of unaccounted-for unexpected expenses and poor timing.\n\n  Despite the urgency the situation and the need for great caution, I continue to make lots of huge money mistakes despite knowing at some level ahead of time that they are probably mistakes. \n\n This kind of anti-pattern is prevalent in every area of my life, from wardrobe choices, to daily activity planning, to even driving choices such as what street to turn on.  \n\nIt's as if my brain knows the right thing to do, but then deliberately chooses the wrong thing anyway.  Surprisingly, its worse the harder I try to be more cautious. \n\nI think  its indicative of widespread problems with executive function, specifically judgment and decision making, but I don't know what I can do about it. It has been getting worse and worse recently  and I am finding that I am no longer able to justify decisions after the fact in ways that make them at least seem remotely well thought out.  I am at the point where I feel I should not be in control of the bank account anymore, if that's any indication.\n\nShould I be worried?  Is this most likely a long term  health issue or a short term response to stress situations that I can expect to improve as I settle into my new environs?  Has anyone else experienced anything like this?  What did you do?", "summary": "I've been making a lot more dumb ass decisions lately and am worried I might train wreck my life.  Help appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_26rlue", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 M] have a huge crush on my friend [24 F], she has a boyfriend though. It's starting to become painful to be her friend and I don't know what do do.", "post": "So I'm friends with this girl. I've only met her recently and I have a crush on her. She's so much fun and she's really funny. We have really similar senses of humor and always talk super fast when we're together. She's just as weird as I am. I usually can figure out what she's going to say and vice versa. When it's just her I feel like we could talk for hours and hours.\n\nShe has a BF though, which is fine. I can respect that. She's been with the guy for several years. But the problem is I thought I could be friends with her, but the truth is, it hurts when I'm around her. And she's always weird with me whenever her boyfriend is around. It's like suddenly we're not cool anymore. It's starting to not feel good to be around her cause it's painful.\n\nThe other problem is she's good friends with a bunch of people from my friend group. And we hang out as a group often.  I want to preserve the sanctity of the group so it's not like I wanna stop talking to her completely (otherwise I would). But I also don't want to talk to her too much because it just makes me depressed. What should I do, Reddit?", "summary": "What should I do about dealing with a girl who's already in relationship and for whom I have feelings for but whose lost friendship might rock the rest of the friendship... ship?"}
{"id": "t3_3rnw0l", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "[Text] Today is the day to help someone in need.", "post": "My faith in humanity has been continuously lost and restored, but this instance of it being lost really upsets me. I am so done.\nJust earlier today, I was on the phone with my best friend while she was driving around doing errands. Suddenly, she yells and the phone cuts out. Panic sets in. \nShe calls back ten minutes later. Come to find out that she is perfectly fine, but just witnessed a vehicle behind her flip. My worry for her dissipates, but is replaced with concern for the unknown people in this vehicle, which turned out to be a mother and her two young children. \nOf course, my friend does what any good human would do, parks her car, calls 911, and runs to help, as does about twenty other people. Seems miracles do happen, as they were able to get the occupants of the vehicle out, completely unscathed. \nBut what truly irks me are the assholes that yelled at them to \"move your shit out of the way, I've got places to be!\". \n...really? Fucking really? \nYou see a vehicle flipped and a crowd of people struggling to help them and all you can think about is how badly you need your morning coffee and that these people are in your way of getting that. \nIt always kills me how bothered some people are when pushed to help another. \"No, I'm too busy.\" \"I have places to be.\" \"How does this benefit me?\" It won't kill you to find what humanity you have left in you and reach out a hand to those that desperately need it. \nIt is not that difficult to to help another human being, to actually give a fuck about someone other than yourself.\nIf you see a woman and two young children crying in an overturned vehicle, you get out and help them, damn it. Don't be that self-absorbed asshole that just drives past.", "summary": "if you see someone in need of help, take two seconds to go and help them. It won't kill you."}
{"id": "t3_16qgfc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] think my father [49M] is a pedophile/sadist.", "post": "I've learned a few things about my father recently, and now i'm starting to think he is a pedophile.\n\nWhen my half brothers (Not related to my dad) were younger, he used to pinch their nipples until they whistled, and then he'd stop, my mum would say something or tell him to stop and he'd beat her, one time he smashed her foot in with a hammer and pissed himself laughing\n\nAlso found out that he did that, and some other things, of which were not disclosed to me, to his nieces and nephews when they were young.\n\nAlso, i remember when i was younger, he used to read / watch porn around me, i was pretty young, but obviously old enough to remember it. (4 or 5) He never did it when my mum was home, and i don't think she knew.\n\nCurrently living with SO and my mum, whenever he comes over to visit (Rarely due to my mother not liking him coming over) he'll sit down the whole time, until my daughter needs a nappy change, then he'll follow me to the nursery and watch.\n\nWhat the hell should i do?", "summary": "Father has done a lot of things that make me think he is a pedophile / sadist, the hell should i do?"}
{"id": "t3_2ep66x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with [ 24M] two good dates but I always have to Start every convo... Am I bugging him?", "post": "Met a nice guy online and we went out. \n\nFirst date was great, we stayed for 4 hours and hit it off really well. \n\nHe texted me after saying he had a great time. I texted him later that week asking if he wanted to hang out again and he quickly responded yes. \n\nWent out a second time and it was rockier. He was pretty moody but had just come off an extremely long work shift and texted me afrr apologizing. In all honesty if that's him \"moody\" it's still nicer than 90% of guys I know and I still had fun. \n\nHe has not kissed me EITHER time. I've made it fairly obvious that I'm into him by asking him to hang out etc and nada. \n\nHe's extremely extroverted but seems pretty shy when it comes to other things so I'm not sure if he's just projecting being confident and is actually shy or not. \n\nAlso when he does respond he sends paragraph long texts and asks me questions but eventually stops responding.\n\nI actually really like this guy but I'm worries I'm bugging him. Any tips? \n\nI ALWAYS  have to start the convo. I know he is extremely busy (moving somewhere new and new job) but I mean it takes 30 seconds to text or call someone... \n\nDo you think I'm bugging him? Or should I ask him to hang again? \n\nI don't want to play games and wait for him to text me as a test as that feels wrong but that's what all my friends say to do... It just feels sneaky and weird to me. \n\nAlso even when I've asked him to text me the next day when we've been making plans he just texts me back in that convo. Never iniates anything.\n\nI paid for our last date even though he offered and I said we could split because the server looked horrified at the idea of splitting the bill and he only had a card on him. Said he would take me\nOut again to make up for it. Not sure if he said that to just be nice or not?", "summary": "Guy never texts me first. Always responds when I text him within the day. I know he is very busy but I'm worried I'm bothering him? Or he's really shy when it comes to girls but is also very outgoing?"}
{"id": "t3_2qiky4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[35M] am looking to propose to my GF[30F] for 2 years. But we are in different states currently and I don't have much money.", "post": "We have been dating for over two years. And I am positive I want to marry her. Her family is giving her pressure about marriage and I want to make it clear that I will marry her. Her family is of a different culture and I have never meet her dad (lives in home country). Her uncle likes me a lot and approved of us. \n\n9 months ago I moved to another state for a job opportunity, it looks like I will get promoted to a long term position very soon. She was hesitant to move here. Today I learned that she would have moved if I proposed 9 months ago. I found out form a common friend.\n\nThe current situation is that I have limited money. Basically few hundred dollars in savings. I can not afford a ring right now, but I hope to save enough by March to buy a simple ring. **Please share any websites you know that sell affordable rings**. My job should be settled by March of next year. At which time I will ask her to move here and propose to her. \n\nMy question to you all is: 1) how can I comfort her and her family. She had a long talk with her dad today and was very sad. Most likely because of our relationship. 2) is proposing over the phone as bad as I think it is 3) should I go online ring shopping with her or keep it the ring a surprise.", "summary": "GF is feeling pressure to get married by her family. I want to comfort her. I love her and plan to marry her."}
{"id": "t3_1sb7in", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do you ever feel that maybe you haven't slept with enough people? (24/f, long-term monogamist.)", "post": "(24/f) I have had two boyfriends in my entire life- each lasting 4+ years. Never really got a chance to sleep or date around. I know that men prefer younger women, and I feel the older I get the harder it will be for me to sleep with men I find attractive, and who find me attractive as well. I have always had trouble finding guys I would like to date or sleep with too.\n\nOnly problem is I have a boyfriend right now, we've been dating 4 years. I love him a lot but we've had a lot of ups and downs, he treated me poorly in the past, but I had forgiven him. Even though I had forgiven him, it's still never quite the same. I guess the combination of the past plus the fact we've been together awhile, etc. kind of contribute to me feeling bored with him sometimes. I just don't want to wake up one day and feel I missed out.\n\nI don't really know if I want to dump him or if I should. Like I said, he brings me a lot of happiness and I love him and don't want to hurt him. I feel conflicted.", "summary": "24/F scared of missing out in life for only having 2 bfs. However, I love my bf. I am conflicted."}
{"id": "t3_3klb44", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by throwing a party.", "post": "Alright guys this fuck up happened about a year ago. I had just gone through a break up and seeing as that my friends were her friends, i started networking. I ended up becoming pretty close with this guy we'll call greg. Greg was... a clingy friend. He'd text me goodmorning everyday (treatment i didnt even get from my ex girlfriend), want to hangout all the time, and constantly poke and tag me in stuff on facebook. It didnt really bug me too much as im a pretty laid back guy, i just took it as an excited friend. The problem i did have with him is that when we went to parties, he'd get black out wasted and everyone we came with had to make sure he was okay the rest of the night. After 4-5 parties where this happened in a row, we decided not to invite him to the next one... which just happened to be one thrown at my house. So we're having a great time without Greg there to worry about, laughing and playing kings cup. That's when i get a call... Greg was on my front porch. He apparently forgot his phone charger at my house a couple days before and was there to get it. The party was in the backyard but luckily my lot is pretty deep and not a sound could be heard from the front porch. Quickly, i grabbed his charger and took it to greg, trying to rush him away before the last of the party animals arrived. He asked, \"Hey SequoiaT, know of any parties tonight?\" I just shook me head no while the rest of the squad walks up with two 36 packs and a bottle of rum. He gave me the dirtiest look and drove off. Havent heard a word from him since.", "summary": "Friend shows up at party he wasn't invited to, told him no party, other friends walk up with booze just as i turn him away."}
{"id": "t3_27rlco", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Unfriending her from Facebook?", "post": "So I was seeing this girl for a few months up until a two weeks ago when she cut it off due to her feeling as if she didn't have time for a relationship at the moment.\n\nI wasn't too bothered by it, but it still wasn't easy because I really liked her. However, tonight I was on a night out with my friends and I saw her for the first time since (not entirely sure if she saw me) talking to some guy, a minute later, I look back and they're kissing a few meters away from me. I had to leave the club at that moment and it was then that I realised that I'm not over her in the slightest and think that the best course of action would be to unfriend her from Facebook to avoid that constant reminder of our time together and the searing image of her with someone else lodged up in there too.\n\nIs this a typical thing to do to someone you were dating for a short period of time? I don't want to come off as a dick or anything, as I generally liked her as a person, I just feel it's a necessary action if I'm to move on easily.", "summary": "Dating girl for few months, she broke up with me 2 weeks ago, saw her tonight kissing another guy, is it a standard response to delete them from Facebook?"}
{"id": "t3_y4pd7", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/M] Should I tell a girl I won't see anymore about my feelings for her?", "post": "Story time!\n\nI took an English class at my community college last semester. In that class I met a girl, and from the very beginning I was... interested in her. We chit-chatted in class, we'd walk to our cars together, but when I tried to hang out with her she suddenly said, \"Sorry, I'm kinda seeing someone\".\n\nI mean, on the inside I was kind of upset, but I knew that even if she was equally interested in me that we'd both be going away to school at the end of the summer (Monterey, California for her/Boston, Massachussets for me). So, I just let it pass. But things between us never changed. We still chit-chatted throughout class and walked to our cars together. We'd spend hours sending texts messages about nothing. One of my coworkers somehow convinced me that she probably wasn't seeing anyone and it was just a 'test'.\n\nAnyways, summer is nearly over and in a couple weeks we'll each go to our separate campuses and (likely) never see each other again.\n\nMy question is... Should I tell this girl that I would've loved an opportunity to date her? If so, how should I go about that? And if not, why?", "summary": "I had a class with a girl, she's wonderful. Should I tell her that I have feelings for her even though we're both about to go to school's across the country?"}
{"id": "t3_2ku6px", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20M] am really into this girl [F20]. How can I not appear to be clingy?", "post": "Hi /r/relationships, first time caller long time blah blah blah.\n\nLast Saturday, I met this amazing girl at a Halloween party. Usually I go out to parties to do the one-and-done thing, but this one is something else. We went on a drunken adventure and ended up making out for a few hours behind the house party. We met up again last Sunday and I thought everything was going great. We ended up kissing for a while again and i walked her back to her dorm. \n\nThroughout the week, we've been having little text conversations here and there that go on for a while every day. Then I ask her what she's up to tomorrow and she doesn't respond. I ran into her on campus today and everything seemed well, but she still didn't give me a definitive answer about her weekend.\n\nYou'll have to forgive me if I seem a little naive, but I've never been in a position like this before. Should I just not make contact with her for a day or so? Am I appearing clingy? How often should I be trying to meet with her this early into the relationship?\n\nIf there's anything that I haven't made clear, feel free to ask. I'm on mobile and this keyboard sucks.", "summary": "how often does a guy need to contact a girl in order to be seen as \"clingy\" in the very early stages of a relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_17vdyq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Does 26/M not love me 27/F, or does he not love me in the way that I want it?", "post": "We've been dating for 14 months now and we get along great. We spend all our free time together and communicate well...most of the time. However, I have always felt a disconnect between what I expect from a loving relationship and what I actually have. \n\nI expect to hear \"I love you\" regularly and other such words of endearment and appreciation. I don't usually hear them. I say them often and get them in return, but he won't ever say them on his own. It really bothers me. \n\nWhen I bring it up he makes sure to tell me that he does love me, and that he'll make an effort to tell me more, but then he doesn't. He has told me how important I am to him, how much I mean to him, and how he wants to work towards a future together. But these are only things he says if I bring it up. And never any other time. Ever.  \n\nAdd on top of that, that I want the relationship to move much faster than he does. I want to move in together and make plans together and he's not quite there. I really don't push him. He has to feel it at his own pace. But I am starting to get the feeling that (although he may care very much) he might not be in love with me. \n\nMy feelings on it are this.. I can hardly contain how much I love him. I want him to know it and feel it and hear it. I want to plan and talk about our plans (not obsessively but comfortably). Why doesn't he want the same for me? Is it a sign that he doesn't or that we show it differently?  Maybe our styles of giving love are just too different.", "summary": "My b/f of over a year never shows verbal affection first. I always have to tell him I love him to hear it in return. It bothers me very much."}
{"id": "t3_2a047f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My semi-devout Muslim LDR boyfriend [30 M] said we can't touch during Ramadan. I [32 F] am upset.", "post": "I only see my boyfriend about once every 4-6 weeks. He is a semi-devout Muslim who used to be extremely religious but divorced after 1 year, at an early age (26). Since then he has had lots of partners and does non-Muslim behaviors regularly, including doing drugs, drinking, having sex with married women, and not praying. \n\nFor reasons I will not get into, I am in a sort of cuckquean relationship with him. I am totally in love with this man and his behaviors don't bother me much because he has proven time and time again that he always chooses me over others, in the end. He hasn't said that he loves me, but I can feel that he does. We have total trust. I am prepared to do anything for him; he need only ask. Except this...\n\nWe live on opposite coasts- him in California, me in NY. I arranged a beautiful, romantic weekend for him in Big Sur and Carmel, which I arranged 100%. Last week I wished him a good Ramadan, and he tells me, \"Oh, I forgot to tell you. We can't touch -at all -- during Ramadan. Sorry.\"\n\nThis greatly upset me as he has sinned repeatedly in the past, and including eating during daylight hours during Ramadan except when he's with family. I made such an effort to visit him and arrange a wonderful weekend for him. \n\nI suppose I don't \"need\" sex with him, but how can he have it both ways? He is picking and choosing what it means to be Muslim. It is hurting me. I would marry him and have his children. I would give up everything I know in NY to be with him in Cali and take care of him forever,and even let him be who he needs to be. One of many wives, even (I am agnostic, FYI). I love him. He is declining to even hold me. \n\nWhat arguments can I make to at least be held and kissed during nighttime hours? Or even have sex?", "summary": "My semi-devout Muslim boyfriend is declining to touch me during Ramadan though he sins repeatedly. We are in a LDR and I arranged a big romantic weekend for us. I am hurt because he is cherry picking his religious behaviors."}
{"id": "t3_p4r6b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not attracted to my bf anymore, what can I do?", "post": "I'm 26 and he's 29 and we 've been together for about 2 years now. When we first met he used to do a lot of sport and go to the gym almost everyday. As soon as we started dating he stopped all activities but kept eating a lot of junk food. After 2 years of inactivity he's gotten big and I'm just not attracted anymore but I feel horrible  because he really is a great guy.\n\nI tried taking him to the gym with me since I also go there almost everyday, in those 2 years I managed to drag him with me 3 times. Each time he said he felt great and can't wait to go back there the next day but when the next day comes he just seat on his couch and stares at his television complaining that his muscles hurt and that he will take the \"day off\". Same thing with food. I've tried to make him eat healthy stuff and to stop drinking sugar drinks but he will still do it in hiding behind my back.\n\nI'm not sure how to approach this anymore. It's come to a point where we joke about his belly and he seems fine with it like that. He even told me \"I'm never going to have my abs back, I'm just not 21 anymore\". He's 29, if he feels old already I'm really worried.\n\nWe're not even having sex anymore. It's been months. I've tried to a few times but he says he doesn't feel good about the way he looks...I'm so confused as to what to do. After 2 years like this I'm about to give up. I fantasize about other men when I masturbate so this can't be a good thing. I used to be so attracted to him, I don't know what happened that he stopped wanting to look good for me as soon as we've been together.", "summary": "bf got fat, used to be in great shape, doesn't want to make any efforts despite me trying to motivate him. I'm fantasizing about other guys."}
{"id": "t3_4ttzih", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Negotiating salary while transitioning out of a sales role.", "post": "I currently work for a very large insurance company in the US in a telephone sales role. I want to transition away from sales into more of a salary position. \n\nWhat I struggle with is right now that, with their HR policies, most positions I can apply for will result in a significant pay cut. I'll explain further:\n\nMy base salary is about 36K, however with commissions I easily pass 50K per year full time. \nThe positions I can post for have a base salary of about 38k, and they currently either raise you to the base, or apply a 7% raise, whichever is more. This effectively cuts my annual pay by 10-15k per year. Because \"on paper\" I only make 36k. \n\nThe majority of people in my department don't have this issue because they typically work about 24-30 hours/week. And they usually break even with the raise plus moving to full time. And from talking with a lot of people, usually there isn't much of a conversation regarding pay. It's typically more of an after thought during the process. \n\nRealistically I know it would be a hard swing to get 40% more than their starting pay. But I feel as though expecting someone to give up over 10k/year because it's not \"officially\" a part of their compensation plan is very one-sided.", "summary": "I'm wondering if any of you fine folk have any knowledge or advice to impart on how to approach negotiating Salary from within a company when transitioning from a Sales role to a Non-sales role."}
{"id": "t3_4y1jld", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Tenant Getting Sued by Landlord", "post": "So me and two friends had an apartment for college in NYS. Halfway through our second lease, our landlord threatened to evict us, so one friend and I found another apartment. A few months later, the landlord claimed we caused $10,000 in damages. The house was 80 years old, and he was trying to pin years of renting to college students and neglect of the apartment on us. So we contacted a lawyer who contacted his. After months of negotiations, we came to an agreement of $8,500 just to get it over with, as it was easier to pay the money 3 ways than go to court. We soon found out that the landlord had sold the house, so there is now a new owner. We haven't heard anything from the landlord's lawyer in about 3 months. I was wondering if the landlord would still be able to sue without owning the property?", "summary": "Landlord tries to sue, we come to an agreement, he sells the property, and we don't hear back. Can he still sue?"}
{"id": "t3_2t5se9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my SO [24 M/] of 2 years, says he never wants to get married because he 'doesn't believe in marriage'.", "post": "Last night my SO and I stumbled upon the subject of marriage. He said he never ever wants to get married. This was quite shocking for me because I DO *eventually* want to get married and I figured we were on the same page. \n\nWhen I asked him to explain why he doesn't ever want to get married he said something about not believing in marriage and that it is unneccesary. I couldn't really explain why I do want to get married other then saying its what people do when they love each other. I've just always dreamt about getting married and see no reason not to.\n\nAs far as I know there aren't any failed marriages in his surroundings so I don't believe its his experience with other marriages that turned him against marrying in general.\n\nLet me just make it clear that I do not want to marry right now or anything, we don't even live together and I like how things are now. I just want it to be a possibility in the future.\n\nI worry that this issue is eventually something that will end our relationship and while I am willing to make compromises I just don't understand his reasoning to not get married, hell I don't even fully understand why I do want to get married! \n\nI'm hoping some of you can help me understand why my SO is against marriage in general.", "summary": "SO says he never wants to get married. I don't understand why because I do want to say I do some day."}
{"id": "t3_2l4mba", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 F] S/O [23 M] of 6 months hangs out with his Ex's roommate (20 F) all the time, advice on how NTGAF?", "post": "Hey reddit, \nMe and my boyfriend have been dating for a relatively short period of time, only about 6 months. Met and started dating pretty quickly, all within about two months. We get along great together, share a lot of interests, goof around a ton, and genuinely care for one another. \n\nFrom the beginning it was known that he and his ex gf were on good terms, no hard feelings and she would actually come over to his apartment a lot to hang out with his roommates because they were still good friends. At first this bothered me, but he assured me that it was nothing to worry about and I began to feel a bit more comfortable.\n\nNow he has been hanging out with his ex's roommate (21 female), mostly when me and him aren't together and also at her apartment. Not sure if this is legitimately something to worry about, but for some reason this rubs me the wrong way. I really don't have trust issues with my boyfriend, and believe that he would never cheat on me or anything. I just feel like this relationship (between him and the roommate) would solely be based on his relationship with his ex, and is a person who they have in common and probably talk a lot about. It makes me uneasy, because she obviously would have a bias to talk positively about her roommate/friend, which could in turn make my SO miss his ex. \n\nUpon writing this, I see how I could come across as jealous- i think it's more of me being insecure. I really just need advice on how not to care about this situation, or steps I could take to feel more comfortable about this relationship my SO wants to keep. \n\nThanks for reading guys!", "summary": "Boyfriend continues to hang out with Ex's roommate/best friend (female), usually when I am not around, and need advice on how not to give a fuck."}
{"id": "t3_2voup3", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Back stab me twice? I'll deny you every time.", "post": "Some back story: I had this friend who we'll call LoudMouth or LM for short. Before I knew LM couldn't keep secrets, I had confided a few things to him. On two occasions I told him some things and on both occasions he goes and 'accidentally' tells the the people who I'm especially not trying to let know... My secrets. So I cut this guy from my life... Fk him. He doesn't know this. \n\nNow for the pettiness. Recently a mutual friend, Kevin, moved out of a residential unit owned by my parents as Kevin decided to move back to his home city. In doing so, Kevin left a few pieces of furniture in the unit. Fast forward 2 months and LM is asking me if I can help him take a piece of furniture from the unit. You have the audacity to ask for a fkin favour after backstabbing me twice? Fk you, so I simply tell him I'm busy with 'life'. A week later he asks me if I can ask my parents for the piece of furniture. To this I tell him 'go read up on the residential act pertaining to furniture that has been leftover upon a mutual agreement of termination between tenant and landlord. Unless you can find me a fking bona fide agreement between my parents and our friend, go fk yourself, that piece of furniture is staying with us as it's mine... Bitch!' And damn did that feel good...", "summary": "my backstabbing ex-friend asked for a favour and I used some knowledge gained over the years to shove his favour up his ass."}
{"id": "t3_1hbw4n", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "guy's girl [27F] always hinting at how close she is to guys", "post": "there's this girl in my group of friends. we're in our late 20s and it's a mixed group of people. she's great but i noticed she has this quirk that's starting to get on my nerves.\n\noften when we hang out, she tells us how close she is to different guys in our group (obviously those guys aren't around when she says these things). not in a romantic way, but more in a prideful way.... to show how close and deep her connection is to these guys. it's often about personal things, about how those guys regularly feel comfortable to talk about their dating, family, personal lives with her.\n\nSometimes it's subtle (\"oh, dave and i just chatted about that issue over the phone last night\"), and sometimes it's not (\"he wouldn't do that. joe and i are really close. he's always told me about that thing since high school.\")\n\nwhat's going on here?\n\ni'm not threatened by her closeness to these guys. i'm a dude and many of these guys are my good friends. it's just weird that she's always talking about it and makes me think that it's a clue for some other issue entirely.", "summary": "girl in circle of friends always trying to hint at how close she is to different guys. what is she hinting at?"}
{"id": "t3_yf6r3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Found out so (23/f) cheated on me(22/m). But it's complicated", "post": "On a throwaway\n\nFirst off, we have limited communication in our long distance relationship. She only has internet access at an internet cafe where she is overseas at the moment. We've only been in this LDR for 3 or 4 weeks, but have been together before that for 3 years.\n\nSo we were chatting, and it seemed like she was hinting as something she was hiding. So I pressed on it, since I was very concerned, and being cheated on while she was away was definitely my biggest fear, as I'm fairly insecure. So she tells me that she and some guy had oral sex, still sex, and ended up spending the night together after getting drunk. Now, at this point, I was furious, I did cool down pretty quickly, but I'm still upset (obviously) It's exactly why I didnt want her going alone, and and felt worried the entire time. She tells me that it happened a couple days ago, and she was going to tell me when we talked next, which she did. She also tells me that it only strengthened her want to be with me, since it wasnt the same. I was shocked, I couldnt believe it, and i just wanted to run over there and see why this happened.  Now we ended up talking about it for about 5 hours. Going back and forth between being somewhat ok, and more upset. But I'm feeling hopeful. She tells me never ever ever again. That is wasnt worth it, and that she's much more suited to monogamy with me. So, I do want to stay with her, I love her more than anything, and I want to work through this, because I believe we can. But I do know reddit has a history of having a \"one strike you're out\" policy on cheating. \n\nSo any advice on ways to work on this, or what to do. I'm espcially looking for advice from people who have been cheated on, but the relationship went on after the incident.", "summary": "GF in LDR cheated on me, more than apologetic, we both want it to work out and stay in the relationship. Both still love each other, ect,ect."}
{"id": "t3_33l9fz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 27Fwith my 29M friend (?) a couple weeks - he wants to be exclusive but not \"formally committed\". What is this guy trying to do?!", "post": "I met Peter* a few weeks ago and we completely hit it off and have been talking all day every day since. We have seen each other several times and have had a great time. \n\nWe have slept together and discussed the fact that both of us like each other a lot.\n\nHe mentioned that a girl asked him to dinner, and he turned her down. I asked if it was because he wasn't interested or if it was because of me. He said it was because of me, and that he may talk to other women but he's not hanging out with them or sleeping with them. \n\nHe said that he's still on Tinder for \"shits and giggles\" which makes sense since we send each other funny profiles and it's a funny topic of conversation among him and his friends etc. but he promised he isn't using it to ask women on dates. (Is this bullshit?)\n\nWe established that we're only going on dates with/sleeping with each other.\n\nHe's very honest and upfront about everything even if it's something I may not want to hear (like him still being on Tinder). So I'm almost inclined to believe him. \n\n*However.....* he claims he doesn't want a label. It's like he wants the commitment without the commitment? He got out of a relationship in February so he said he doesn't want a \"formal commitment\" right now ie FB official, boyfriend/girlfriend titles... but I was under the assumption that exclusively dating/sleeping with each other was just that - a commitment. \n\nI don't know if I'm getting played or what. Before I met Peter* I was casually talking to another guy, Steve*. I feel like maybe Peter is trying to manipulate me into only seeing/sleeping with him while he still is out screwing around. \n\nI'm hesitant to break things off with Steve* because I'm not 100% sure of Peter's* intentions.\n\nWhat do you guys think?", "summary": "Guy says he wants to exclusively date/sleep with each other but not have a \"formal commitment\". What is he doing?!"}
{"id": "t3_1tcp3a", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it a dirtbag move to wait in the wings for a bad relationship to fail so I can date the girl I have had a crush on since we were kids?", "post": "This girl who I have known for years, (We have both been in serious relationships, so it's not like I have been timelessly waiting for the moment) has told me that her SO will ditch her to go to house parties, and generally makes no time for her. I have had a thing for her since we were about 15, but never acted on it. Is it a wrong to wait until she is done with the relationship to ask her out for dinner? I don't want to be the reason for a breakup, but I feel like I have a lot more to offer her than this guy and am willing to wait until they break up.", "summary": "Girl I have liked for about 10 years is about to dump her neglectful boyfriend. How long is acceptable before I can ask her out without looking like I am playing off of the breakup?"}
{"id": "t3_4qlabc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am i getting the wrong ideas in this friendship?", "post": "i[15M] have liked this girl[15F] for a quite a lone time. I never really talked to her due to us not having classes till we each had a friend who came to gether and we were heavily involved which lead on to us talking more often. I was upfront about it that i like her cause i had not much to lose and she liked another guy. We talked alot and watched tons of netflix through skype/facetime and at school, she gave me a hug before class. So i started hugging her before her classs and we sat together at lunch. I really started to think she was getting to like me when one time she snuck a kiss on my cheek before class. And then one day at the end of school i was getting to hugh her and she pushed back and went home. When i asked her what was that on text, she simple told me \"I couldnt hug you because my crush was right behind you\". And now ive just been depressed. I feel like its my fault for getting my hopes up too high", "summary": "I really liked a girl and we started talking alot. We started regularly hugging and she gave me a kiss which got my hopes up. Then was going o hug her but she declined because her crush was behind me"}
{"id": "t3_2xvqru", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "M18 with crush on F18 and wanting to ask her to movie but keep chickening out?", "post": "Okay, So I'm a senior in highschool, and so I'll apologize now if this is not the best sub to post this in and I will willingly move it if needed.\n\nThat being said, let me give some backstory: I've had an off and on crush on this girl for almost three years. I've gotten to the point I've wanted to ask her out two years ago, and I tried by asking her first if she had a boyfriend, to which she responded yes, and then I just got nervous/disappointed and just went \"oh, okay.\" and walked away without another word. I haven't spoken to her much since thanks to me being nervous and still awkward about that whole incident.\n\nHowever, now, she's single and I really want to take a shot and ask her to a movie, however, every time I see her in the hall, I chicken out and just keep walking by. I can't even get the conversation started. How do I overcome this fear and is she even going to really hold the whole awkward moment against me? And what's even the best way to ask a girl out like that? I've had girlfriends before, but I've managed to either just date people I've already known, or they ask me.", "summary": "Nervous about asking a girl I haven't talked to much out to a movie and unsure of how to do so and get over fear."}
{"id": "t3_47bam3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23/M] and my girlfriend [23/F], said she needs space to sort stuff out, I don't know what to do.", "post": "I'm sorry for the wave of text you're about to receive. I'm going to keep this as short as possible. We've been together 3 months, and have been fighting like crazy. I work full time(50+hrs/week), and she works/goes to school full time\n\n.\nBefore we got together, she said that school comes first and foremost, and I agreed. So the relationship as a whole went great, we were hanging out a lot, sex was awesome, and for the 1st time in my life I felt truly happy. Well the sex slowed to an eventual stop. She started pulling away from me. This was off and on until a few weeks, and I noticed something was up, then she basically told me how she was super stressed and needed space.\n\nI asked her if her feelings for me changed, and she said they weren't as strong as they were a month ago. I gave her the chance on multiple times to end it, but she didn't. After a week of hell, she sent me a long drawn out text saying how she felt like she was dragging a ball of chain, and how she felt like she had to report to me because I'd ask her questions like, how was your day?, what are you up to?, she didn't like small talk texting everyday because it was distracting.\n\nI would ask her to hangout on certain days that way I can still see her and give her the space she needs. She said that ultimately that wasn't reasonable for her, and that all she asked is for time to sort her shit out. Since the text, we went out to dinner, and still say goodnight/morning and talk a little bit, but I want to get back to where we were.\n\nI have been fighting through this because ultimately I feel that this is worth fighting for, and I don't simply believe in giving up and breaking up when things get rough. She doesn't take any bs, so I feel as though if she were going to break up with me after all this shit, she would have by now. Ultimately I need help reddit, what can I do to fix this?", "summary": "girlfriend said her feelings for me weren't as strong as they were a month ago. Says she needs space for school and to sort her shit out. Need advice on how to fix."}
{"id": "t3_prg5b", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redding, I got totally shit on by someone I thought was one of my best friends. What's the worst way someone's done you wrong?", "post": "Someone I thought of as a close friend for 25 years totally shit on me this week. I've dropped everything to be at his side in his times of need, given him money when he needed it, listened and encouraged him when things weren't going his way; basically bent over backwards to be the best friend I knew how. \n\nLast Thursday I was unexpectedly hospitalized due to a violent reaction to a new medication. I spent two nights in the hospital, had to have an MRI and EEG, and was scared out of my mind. I was unconscious part of the first night, but when I got myself together enough early the next morning I texted my \"friend. ' after getting no reply, I called and left a message. As of today I still haven't heard from him. \n\nI am devastated that he would do this after all we've endured. I've never had any sort of health crisis before, and am totally shocked at having been basically abandoned in my hour of need.", "summary": "longtime friend ditched me in the midst of a serious crisis. How have you been fucked over by a so-called friend? "}
{"id": "t3_rvx5m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "what are your best grown man tantrum stories?", "post": "Tonight a few friends and I went to a kegger in the student housing area around my school. Everyone was having a good time(not to big of a party, about 60 people) and one friend, who was really high at the time, was especially enjoying his take-out chicken fingers and fries. \n\nAnyway he had given a few of the chicken tenders away and someone proceeded to grab his last nugget, dunk it and eat it in one bite right in front of him. Now the friend with the chicken proceeds to throw his beer on the legs and feet of the chicken aggressor and yell some obscenities at him. \n\nThe following conversation included such timeless classics as **\"What kind of man eats another mans last nugget\"**, and **\"Honestly man, you need to grow up and learn to not eat other peoples last tenders\"** and something else along the lines of i need that for sustenance. He than storms out the door and slams it behind. The whole party is now in silence and someone asks what that was about\n\n\"someone ate his chicken\"", "summary": "A friend freaked out, threw beer on someone and slammed the door at a party because he ate his last piece of chicken."}
{"id": "t3_23t1jq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (25f) don't know what's going on with my fwb (27m) situation.", "post": "About 5 months ago, I (25f) met a guy (27m) at a friend's party.  He took me home and we ended up sleeping together and he stayed over.  We've continued sleeping together at least once a week since. We've talked about the fact that we're both pretty wary of relationships.  \n\nThe only times we spend together are at each others' houses or if we happen to run into each other at a public place (like a bar) and then end up going home together (happens very rarely).  When we're together, we talk about our lives (jobs, friends, happenings, family, etc.).  We don't communicate very much when we're apart except to hook up. \n\nThe other day, I invited him over as usual.  We did not, however, have sex.  I tried to initiate it, but all he wanted to do was kiss a bit, rub on me, and go to sleep. \n\nWas he just not feeling into sex that day/super tired? If so, why would he come over if that's pretty much all our relationship has been? Does that mean he's catching feelings? Am I reading too much into all of this?", "summary": "FWB and I hung out and didn't have sex for the first time, and I'm a little weirded out by it."}
{"id": "t3_4gg47h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Dumped twice in 9 days! Advice needed!", "post": "My girlfriend (29F) broke up with me (28M) last week but after some discussions, we decided to try again. We got in an argument on Saturday and she broke up with me again. I left and hung out with my friends. Well I proceeded to get black out drunk and hooked up with someone else... She then talked to me on Sunday and I said I needed sometime apart, we agreed not to talk for 2 weeks and revisit this then. She then texted me later on Sunday saying \"if you hook up with anyone, don't even bother talking me.\" So my questions are, 1) did do anything wrong? I mean she broke up with me again, I was operating that we weren't together and I was incredibly intoxicated. 2) should I tell her now, tell her when we talk in 2 weeks, or bury it deep down?", "summary": "gf dumped me, I got drunk and hooked up with someone else, she wants to revisit but said she wouldn't if I hooked up with anyone else."}
{"id": "t3_3b2ugt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I am pretty sure my (37M) wife (29F) has an eating disorder but I don't know what I can do", "post": "We have been together for 4 years, married for 2. \nSorry for any mistakes or lack of clarity, English is not my first language. \n\nMy wife has always been thin but she always ate and exercised. Recently, her eating habits have become extremely troubling to me. She will not eat in front of me or anyone else now. If we go to a restaurant, she eats maybe three bites, and takes the rest home and won't eat it until I'm asleep. \n\nShe also spends an abnormally long amount of time in the bathroom, and  I searched online for eating disorder symptoms and she seems to fit many of the symptoms of bulimia. Her knuckles always look irritated and I asked her about it and she said it was from her kickboxing class, I also asked her why she wouldn't eat in front of anyone anymore and she got extremely defensive and slept in another room in our house. \n\nI read online also that events can trigger eating disorders if someone has struggled with them in the past. She has never told me she has had issues with eating, I do not know much about eating disorders, but I am wondering if this has to do with the miscarriage she had along with lot of the stress she has had with her work. I am so worried about her but when I ask her anything about it, she gets angry at me and sleeps in another room. Do I tell her family? Or what. I am just not sure what to do.", "summary": "I am pretty sure my wife has an eating disorder that has been triggered by a miscarriage and stress, and I am unsure what I can do to get her help"}
{"id": "t3_2clcly", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] and my boyfriend [23M] want to experiment with different kinks. Suggestions on how to go about this/be safe?", "post": "Throwaway account here, so excuse the lame username.\n\nSo my boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year and a half or so. We decided that we wanted to spice up our sex life by experimenting with different kinks. It's not that our sex life is boring as is right now, it's more that we just both decided we'd like to expand our sexual horizons. We think it could be interesting and fun. (And yes, this is a healthy and stable relationship.) Both of us are into it, but I wanted some advice or suggestions before we started exploring. I'm looking for suggestions as to what kinks to try, how to keep it safe, and anything that could help us.", "summary": "Bf and I want to spice up sex life by exploring kinks, advice and suggestions are needed/welcome."}
{"id": "t3_1eenn9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help with a girl (F)(19) and me male (20) that just started talking. Dont know what to do??", "post": "Im new to reddit, so please excuse me if i didnt exercise proper reddit form. \n\nIve know this girl for about a year. Shes a mutual friend of my good guy friend, so i never really knew he too well. But out of the blue the other day, she texts me (i didnt have her #). Shes a pretty girl, so i was shocked that she initiated the conversation. She just got home from school and is home for the summer. \n\nNow usually its the guy who (in my experience) statrs the conversations, and texts the girl first (she keeps on texting me first everyday, i dont mind its just different from my past experiences). Now im getting a good vibe from her, so i ask her to hang out. Then she stiffs me (something about having to go to LA to see her family). Then i ask her the next day, another excuse. Then ask again, and she keeps saying \"we'l get together at some point\". So i was thinking she just was no longer intested, but she continues to text and talk to me. I just getting weird vibes from it because she hasnt came to hang out yet. Im looking for advice as to what to do.", "summary": "hot girl texts me everyday but wont hang out with me (always has \"something\" going on). Not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_52lkgw", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Lost my passion for what I do after 10 years; Feel very stuck.", "post": "I started my current job as a PT position while in high school. It's in the field of media and video production which I loved growing up. Attended some college while working at my job, but college didn't feel right for me and I dropped out. I've been employed at my job now since 2006. Over the years, as the pay and responsibility increased, I have found myself transitioned into what is essentially a very mundane and monotonous desk job doing programming and transcoding of media files for 40 hours a week, where before I obtained this higher level position, it was mainly creative projects and generating original media for the company which I had control of.\n\nI am now 26 y/o and extremely unhappy in my current position, have that \"stuck\" feeling, and no longer get along well with my superior and it affects my mood outside of work around my family. It's mentally eating me up inside and I really want a change in my life toward employment in a field that will be more active, rather than being at a desk in a windowless room. \n\nThe problem is, I make $18/hr (which for me personally is a good sum of money that takes care of the bills and most of whatever else i need) and my health insurance/benefits are fantastic. I've been dealing with the mental stress of this job for a year or two since losing interest and motivation, but feel chained to it because I don't think I'll find similar-paying gainful employment elsewhere due to my lack of education and specific set of skills. \n\nDoes anyone have any pro life tips for me to conquer this? Do I reinvent myself from the inside to accept the fact that I'm lucky to be employed at all and try to quell back the sadness, or do I reinvent myself by setting a hard quit date say 8 months from now while I work on seeking new skills? I don't want to ever be in this field again.", "summary": "been at my job for ten years. climbed the ladder and hate my current position- don't get along too well with boss anymore, affects my mood and demeanor at home in a negative way."}
{"id": "t3_2fkbil", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] and my girlfriend [23 F] of 6 months, have a conflict with my mom's belief", "post": "Hi I will keep this relatively brief.\n\nMy girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for about six months now. She is a great person, with a rocky past but is trying to move forward in life.\n\nShe recently took a job with an organization that performs abortions. This isnt a health clinic, but a full service center for women and sexual health. She is working on the administrative side and this is a cause she feels drawn to. \n\nI did not want to tell my mom about this situation, but my father accidentally told her through casual conversation (I was just planning on lying to my mom about her new job). So now my mom knows that she is working for this organization. \n\nMy mom is a pretty easy going person... except on this issue. She is very very very passionate about protecting the unborn. My girlfriend does not know that my mom knows yet, and I don't know how to handle it.\n\nMy mom basically said it breaks her heart and that I am breaking her heart by condoning my girlfriends career choice. \n\nI need some help navigating this situation. I obviously don't want to hurt the great and mature bond I have with my mom, but I also don't want to break ties with my girlfriend or for her to be in a hostile environment when we visit.\n\nTo provide more context, my girlfriend and I live in the same town as my folks and we see them at least once a week if not more.", "summary": "My mom is super pro-life and my girlfriend just got a job at a place that services abortions... clash *boom* help please"}
{"id": "t3_4fyxm9", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [21/m] am fresh out of my only relationship [6 yr], I have no idea how to date, how to flirt", "post": "Just mutually broke up with my first and only girlfriend, and now I'm totally lost. I know next to nothing about how to flirt or participate in the dating game played at my age because the last time I actively sought companionship I was only 15.\n\nThe big hangup for me isn't just not knowing what to do or where to go, it's the fact that I'm really not a hookup kind of guy, that's not to say I'm only looking for a wife every time I meet someone new, but everything about my personality drives me towards longer term relationships with labels. I also don't drink which can make finding places to hang out with anyone on a date or just to meet people at my age kind of hard. \n\nLastly I feel like another obstacle is I've built an image with my friends and anyone I might be interested in dating in the future of myself as a very confident and happy guy, but without the support of my now-ex, I feel pretty depressed and very lonely most of the time and I just hide it when I'm with my friends.", "summary": "I was in a long term relationship since I was 15 that supplied me with confidence that I now no longer have and I don't know how to flirt or date without wanting to move towards a more committed relationship."}
{"id": "t3_1jkx39", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "People in long term relationships, are you still attracted to your partner? [xposted to r/relationships]", "post": "I've been in a relationship [me27f, SO31m] for almost 5 years but there has been little sexual attraction (on my part) for the past 2 or 3 years. It's quite frustrating as we have an otherwise great relationship, and he still finds me just as sexually attractive as ever. We love each other, and he views me as the future mother of his children and the woman he will marry one day.\n\nI still find him physically attractive, but there is no sexual attraction at all. It's definitely not a psychological thing because I have found myself attracted to other people. Is losing sexual attraction to a long term partner normal? Is sexual attraction important in a long term relationship/marriage?\n\nHow many of you in long term relationships (2+ years, are still sexually attracted to your partners? Are there any of you who aren't? I can't imagine him not being in my life, but I also can't imagine being with someone forever who I am not sexually attracted to. \n\nI'm just wondering how many of you are in a similar experience or have had a similar experience\u2026it's quite frustrating.", "summary": "In a ltr and sexual attraction has faded on my end. How many of you in lts are still attracted to your partners? Is losing attraction normal?"}
{"id": "t3_2sahzn", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (20F) have never been able to orgasm with my fiance (22M). Any advice?", "post": "We have been together for two years, and before him I only had one other sexual partner, with whom I also never reached orgasm. I've been masturbating for many years without a problem and can always easily get myself off, but it doesn't work when someone else does it to me. My fiance and I have tried everything we can think of; oral, fingering, fingering plus PIV, just PIV. And it all feels really good, but I don't ever feel close to orgasming. The closest I've gotten is fingering+oral, which feels pretty close, but it always reaches a pleasure plateau and I know I won't get off. I recently got my first vibrator, which was awesome when I used it alone, but when I used it during sex and when he used it on me, I had that same plateau experience. Its been very frustrating for me and has led me to feel like something is wrong with me, and I have increasingly had anxiety about it, causing me to enjoy sex less in general. Additionally, my boyfriend is not as sexual as me, and though he is usually willing to have sex when I want, I feel bad about asking knowing that I'm not going to finish; this further adds to my stress about it. I just feel like if I could get off in front of my boyfriend and eventually have him get me off, I would be less stressed about sex. I feel like I'm missing out on an intimate, important part of our relationship. I also think that a huge part of it is a mindset issue for me, and that I'm probably looking at sex in an unhealthy way, but I'm not sure how to look at it differently to reduce the stress. Something we've talked about trying is just having me masturbate in front of him. Does that seem like a good first step? Honestly I'm worried that if we try it that way I suddenly won't be able to get myself off. Anyway, does anyone have any advice about this? Any similar experiences? Thanks a bunch!", "summary": "I've never had an orgasm with my fiance, and I feel increasingly stressed about it, which makes sexy stuff less enjoyable overall."}
{"id": "t3_353l6v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21M] have seen this girl [??F] I know nothing about on-campus the last few days... how do I ask her out?", "post": "So while walking around campus, I've seen this girl the last few days whom I've never seen before but who's really caught my eye. The only thing is that I have absolutely *zero* knowledge about her. Zilch. No idea her name, her age, major, anything. At the same time, I'm going to be leaving college for the summer, maybe permanently (I'm graduating but looking into a way to stay here and get a job), but more than anything, I don't want to leave here with any \"What if?\"s and all that jazz.   \n  \nSo, reddit, what's the best way to ask a girl you only see every once in a while in a way that doesn't come across as creeperish?", "summary": "I want to ask a girl I don't know out on a date; how do I do that without seeming like a weirdo?"}
{"id": "t3_11gi2l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[23f] Just confronted my boyfriend of 5 years [24m] about a text conversation I found between he and another man from earlier this morning in regards to a potential discrete hook-up/fwb. I'm kind of at a loss.", "post": "My boyfriend ALWAYS sleeps through his alarm, yet he always has one set. I wake up this morning to do just that when I notice \"horny as fck\" in a text when I used the pull down screen on a smartphone.\n\nI open it, and see risque/nude photos my boyfriend sent of himself to another guy, seeking a fwb type of thing. It sounded quite eager. They were hoping to meet as early as tonight, when my boyfriend got off work.\n\nI realize this might be embarrassing for my boyfriend so I calmly ask if we could talk about something. He tried to play dumb at first but finally came around. He said he has never hooked up with anyone and would never do so, it just turns him on talking to other guys. I guess it excites him like a fetish. The reason he doesn't flirt and do this with girls is because of me. He always felt grossed out after the fact and always deleted everything. \n\nThe talk itself didn't go well. He was really defensive, shifting the blame at times on me, \"I only do this when I'm too depressed, when I don't get enough attention from you... etc.\" He said he isn't bi, gay, and wouldn't have a threesome with another guy. \n\nOur relationship isn't the greatest and has been rocky for the most part/as of late. We don't have sex often, and I feel like the emotional connection isn't there anymore. Brief background on our relationship: it began abusive and gradually got worse, but after 2 and a half to 3 years in, it got better. Less hitting, more verbal attacking. I'm not trying to dog on him, he's a good guy at times, but more or less I feel like a lot of the times our relationship is a love/hate thing, literally.", "summary": "I caught my boyfriend trying to hook up with another guy via text -- my bf sent nude photos to him. "}
{"id": "t3_2m76l1", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "If you are thinking about joining DirecTV - DONT!!", "post": "Hey all, first time post here.  Just wanted to share my DirecTV experience in the hope of helping out anyone else that might be considering signing up.\n\nI joined DirecTV a little over year ago because I had grown extremely dissatisfied with Time Warner Cable.  One the the incentives/perks DirecTV offers to new customers is a free season of their NFL Sunday Ticket package.  This is a nice perk for many people I guess, but not really useful for me because I follow the local team and all the games are on local broadcast TV.\n\nFast forward to this year, I looked at my October billing statement and found out that DirecTV has been charging me $40/month for the past several months for the fucking NFL Sunday Ticket package that I did not choose to renew! I have auto pay, so I don't normally look at my bill very closely and didn't notice until my October statement. I called customer service and had to speak to four different levels of people before I finally got someone who said she would take care of it for me.  The call took more than 45 minutes and was beyond frustrating.  \n\nTwo weeks later I received my next bill and, you guessed it.  There is another $40 charge on there for NFL Sunday Ticket.  I called back in and found that the first three people I had spoken to on my previous call had noted the account, up to the point that they told me the most they could do was credit me for half of the charges.  The final supervisor I spoke to never noted the account - how convenient.  I ended up spending another 55 minutes on the phone and talked to another four people, but never got anyone to offer anything other than crediting me for half the charges.  At this point I am going to file a small claims suit against DirectTV and will be cancelling my service as soon as my contract is up in July.", "summary": "DirecTV added services to my account that I did not ask for and billed me for it.  After wasting almost two hours of my time, they will only refund half of what they charged for the unwanted services. "}
{"id": "t3_1p4sqw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] of 2 years: he's active on an online dating site. PLEASE HELP!", "post": "He left his mail open on MY laptop, I scrolled but didn't open anything and saw that a girl had \"responded to [his] message\" on a dating website. I'm pre-freak out (just a few tears) because I wanted some advice first. \n\nI know I'm the wrong. I shouldn't have looked. In addition, I had an account on a different site during our relationship that I closed six months ago after he found out (I secretly met up with a lesbian from the site and he walked in before anything sexual happened. He broke up with me but we got back together soon after).\n\nI wish I could \"unsee\" what I saw. Do I talk to him? Do I just let it eat me alive knowing that we deserve our privacy? I feel so betrayed, but also I feel like I deserve it. There's no harm in chatting, but what if it's more than that? Maybe there's a point in a relationship in which both parties have just been too cruel to continue the cycle of shock and forgiveness. What's the protocol for this situation?", "summary": "I met a girl from an online dating site and he forgave me for it, now I find out that he's chatting to girls online."}
{"id": "t3_39lnfx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[25f] needs help with text etiquette with the guy I'm seeing [25]", "post": "Hi everyone! I'll keep this short. Also I'm on mobile so please excuse mistakes.\n\nThis guy and I dated for 5 years. We broke up this past December and moved 2hrs away from each other. Last month we decided to try again and take things extremely slow.\n\nI texted him yesterday morning asking him if he wanted to go watch Jurassic World in the town my sister is in (about an hour away so it'll require some coordination and planning) this weekend. No day was set yet. That was at 10am. \n\nI texted him back to try to see if he wanted to hike and do the movie after in the town because the area is known for being great for hikes. He replied, asking if it would be a whole day thing. I replied that it would be. Then I hear nothing back until I am putting my phone down because I'm about to pass out. This morning I check my phone and he texted me back over 12hrs later asking what time would we leave and that he was okay with my hike+movie plan.\n\nThe problem is that during this entire day's worth (over 12hrs!) of silence from him, my friends start making plans for stuff this weekend that I would like to take part in.\n\nSo my dilemma is this. Am I in the wrong for not holding out for him to reply? Should I not try to make any plans with friends when something may possibly have the potential of happening with him at some point in the future? I know people can get busy but I personally don't want to feel like I'm waiting by the telephone for a guy to respond...", "summary": "Guy I'm seeing doesn't respond to questions about plans until an entire waking day's worth of hours have passed. "}
{"id": "t3_1p50yb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend's [M24] really embarrassed. How do I [F24] explain to him that I still find him attractive?", "post": "This is pretty innocent but he's embarrassed, so I figured I'd ask.\n\nLast night, my boyfriend had his wisdom teeth removed and was VERY loopy after the surgery. I was the one driving him home and taking care of him, so I got to witness the whole thing. \n\nDuring the five minute car ride home, he was zoning in and out and was really quiet. When we got home, I made him go to bed because he said he was tired. So as I was tucking him in, I leaned in to give him a hug and that's when he started crying. Like he literally had his arms wrapped around me and was crying into my chest for ten minutes. lol. Poor thing. \n\nHe's a manly guy and in the year we've been together, that was the first time I've ever seen him cry. He's not the emotional type at all.\n\nAnyway, once the drugs wore off and he woke up this morning, he was extremely embarrassed. Now he's worried that I may not find him attractive anymore. \n\nIs there anything I can do to make the situation better? Do I need to sit down and have a heart to heart talk with him? Or do I just pretend like it never happened?", "summary": "Boyfriend cried for the first time in front of me last night and now he's worried that I find him unattractive."}
{"id": "t3_30hbyj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15M] with my mums flatmate/boyfriend/friend [42M] wondering if we can ever get our relationship back to how it used to be.", "post": "Ok so for a little backstory my mum started dating this guy when I was 4 before she divorced with my father. But after 1 year called it off with my father who later remarried and moved away but this new man has been a father figure to me ever since. So over this 11 year period there have been 8 accounts of both verbal and physical assault of which I witnessed ( most likely quiet a few more) and 2 of them involving  me calling the police and him getting arrested and 1 failed attemp at a restraining order. \n\nOk so after all of this happened about 2010 she was finaly called it of with him which was hard as he controlled her financialy and less than 6 months later I see her phone in the table and a notification on the phone giving a time and address so it clicked she was back to dating him and thus began the cycle again of abuse and break up and this happened up until mid 2014. This is where the relationship stopped for a while until we then move in with him as a flat mate and this I find hard to believe as they sleep in the same bed and have heard them having sex even though we live in a 3 room flat. So can and should I try and forgive and become how it used to be even if he did what he did.", "summary": "should I forgive and try and make up with a man who abused and controlled my mother for years even if he was like a father figure to me."}
{"id": "t3_1jtwqe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[18F] with my boyfriend [23M] of several months, recently got into a fight and he's suddenly making everything my decision.", "post": "A couple weeks ago my boyfriend and I got into a fight over something small resulting in him apologizing for overreacting, but things havent been the same. He's been constantly apologizing about what happened and making every choice up to me, like what movie to watch, where to go, what to do, ect. I dont know if he's just feeling bad about the fight or if he doesnt have the effort to care about our relationship anymore. Normally we are very open with each other and i could just ask him if anything is wrong between us but i dont want it leading to another fight.", "summary": "Got into a fight with my boyfriend and now every decision is up to me. Does he not care anymore or is he just feeling guilty?"}
{"id": "t3_3noewp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my BF [40M] of 3 months, and a lot of things are popping up..", "post": "I met my SO last year during one of our classes at university. He had to go back to university to upgrade a few courses for his job, while I have been working on my program. We hit it off right away! Throughout the semester we hung out, studied together, and made plans to do different activities. Around the start of he summer I told him that I really liked him, and that I really wanted to be exclusive with him. He was open about how he felt and asked how I would feel dating I guy in his 40s. I told him I could careless!\n\nBefore we met, he and his now ex wife of 10 years just broke up. Throughout the our relationship he has had to deal with a lot of the paper work and dealings from the divorce. I have been trying to be supportive and helpful in anyway possible. But, I have been noticing that things have been popping up in the last month. \n\nHe has been balancing the few courses he has been doing, along with work and his divorce settlement. But, for some reason, I just feel like I haven't been any importance to him. He doesn't really want me around when he is dealing with all of the legal stuff and issues with his ex wife. Not to mention, the last couple times we have scheduled to meet up or hang out, he has ended up backing out the day of. We haven't really seen each other in a couple weeks.. Plus, we don't really text a whole lot as much as we used to.. I'm worried that he is getting less interested in me. Am I reading too much into this?", "summary": "Started dating my SO in the beginning of the summer. Things have been popping up on his end lately, and we barely see each other or speak that much. How should I proceed in this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_1elias", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23M) recently broke up with a long-term GF (23F), having second thoughts.", "post": "We dated for 2.5 years since junior year of college. I ended things about 1 week ago because I felt that although she was someone I considered marriage material, I felt I had not dated around enough as I was beginning to have doubts. She was a great girlfriend, and we did have some real wonderful moments. I simply couldn't get past my apprehensions, and on a deeper level I did sometimes feel that we weren't compatible. (we're both very laid back/easy-going so we rarely did anything - kind of realized I needed a much more active, opinionated gf). \n\nI feel like a part of me is gone and I miss her very much. I do realize that this is part of the healing process. We dated for a while and it is weird to not be with her/in constant contact. However, I have struggled as all I can remember are the good parts of the relationship, but not how I felt sometimes that it needed to end when I was in it.  \n\nI can't help but feel like I may have let something slip through my fingertips. Although I have had a few gf's in the past, I have never broken up with anyone for seemingly no reason (such as someone cheated) so I feel its been harder.\n\nHave I made the right decision?", "summary": "Missing ex-gf I broke up with because I was having doubts about our relationship/felt the need to date around and try new things. Right decision?"}
{"id": "t3_11q5nj", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(20 M) I have started having issues with my (19 F) girlfriend after almost 2 and a half years, now we are on a break...", "post": "So yeah i really dont know what this is but i thought this might be a safe place to post considering i dont really know anyone here. It is somewhat relevant, that due to her strong sense of religion we have postponed sexual relationships which is her choice and i respect it. Currently im in a LDR with my girlfriend and it has been like this for over a year. At first, it was great, we traveled, she visited NJ, NY and we even went to Peru, but recently she has been having trouble at school so we havent had a chance to connect. A couple of days ago she we had an argument, she was never able to be there for me and i ended up having to carry our relationship. This is when things took a turn for the worse. During our earlier stages in our relationship, we reached second base, I did not just throw myself onto her but i did not do anything to stop myself. So for the last year or so given the situation we might get to second base ( and i truly saw nothing wrong with it) and only second base. I recently found out that this actually wasn't as innocent for her and she had been keeping quiet feeling that if she said something she might jepordaize our relationship. I truly feel so ashamed of myself, i have begged her for her forgivness i mean i truly feel like i the worst scum of this earth having taken advantage of her but at this moment i feel it is pointless. She asked me for a break and while it has only been 2 days i just cant get rid of this feeling. I know many people here have had worse problems, and i truly feel for all those people but i have no where else to turn so even if no one can help it feels a bit better to just let some of it out.", "summary": "I inadvertantly took advantage of my Gf and now realize the damage i have caused and fear it might not be able to be fixed."}
{"id": "t3_1qve9r", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Any suggestions on how to get a Hayao Miyazaki?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for a couple of years now, but we've never gotten the time to spend Christmas with each other in person before due to international studies and work. We are always so busy during the holidays, but this year we've decided to finally spend our holidays together for one and I'm so excited!\n\nHer family and herself are a pretty well off family in the upper class, while I'm just about average middle class. Why I'm stating this is because when it comes to getting her a present, she's a bit expensive due to how accustomed she is due to her background. I spoil her when I get the chance and I try to pamper her, because I'm absolutely in love with her.\n\nWith that being said, she's a huge Totoro fan and also Hayao Miyazaki fan. My idea this year is nothing that could come that money can buy, but hopefully by the off chance that anyone could suggest me on how I could obtain his autograph on a Totoro picture or anything for that matter?\n\nHayao Miyazaki has made such a huge impact on her life artistic wise and I guess the fact that she's also Japanese, she just feels that it represents much of her culture as well.\nAny suggestions will help.", "summary": "I really want to make this X-Mas memorable for my girlfriend by getting her a Hayao Miyazaki autograph. Any suggestions or connections? :)"}
{"id": "t3_ujybw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(19m) I want advice about approaching strangers, in groups/ alone. I'll explain more...", "post": "...in the post! I like to think that i'm pretty charismatic most of the time, I'm a bit chubby but not threatening. So why is it hard for me to approach strangers in groups? Especially if i'm alone. Like if I go to a pool hall or something I won't talk to anybody unless someone approaches me. I play pool by myself a lot in school. I think i'd be really nice to make friends with people and anybody that I know would tell you that once I get to know you I'm anything but shy. Is this a regular thing?\n\nI figure once I can approach people and groups as a friendly person I might be able to do it with the opposite sex after a while. Also I can do being introduced by a mutual friend but without a necessary cause (work, school, summer camp,etc) I cannot talk to unknown people. Finally doing this without seeming like a creeper would be nice too!", "summary": "Help me talk to strangers individually and in groups as a friend so that I can talk to people that I might want to have sex with as easily."}
{"id": "t3_1rq21q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 M] don't know how/when to tell my parents that I'm moving out of the house... and out of state.", "post": "I'm living with my parents right now, due to some serious injuries I've since recovered from.  I have the opportunity to move for a 9 month internship that might turn into a job.  Even if it doesn't, I'd like to be in the general area where I want to settle down, so that I can drive to future interviews.\n\nI'm planning to move in March, and haven't told my family yet.  I will probably tell my sister first, as she's the most reasonable.  I like my parents, but they're kinda... strange sometimes.  They don't like risk at all, and have told me many times that they don't understand why I want to live in a specific region when I can save money by working locally... even though it's a bad state for my career and I've hated it ever since moving here.\n\nAny advice?  I'm thinking of telling my sister today.  Otherwise I'd need to explain why I'm not signing with her new gym (last day to do it for cheap!) and naming her as referral.", "summary": "Parents want me to stay local.  I'm planning to move pretty far away, and don't know when to tell them.  Should I tell my sister today?"}
{"id": "t3_eqdtq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Father will not allow my older sister to attend Christmas. Feeling lost, and extremely sad for her...", "post": "So I come from a relatively broken family. My mom left when I was in high school, and my sister also chose to live a more frivolous lifestyle during her years of adolescence. Over the the years, she began to live more 'ghetto' lifestyle; welfare, drugs, boyfriend who beat her, went to jail... etc. She recently got married to him, and my father chose to NOT attend the wedding because he was morally against her marrying this individual. \n\nLast year, She was told that she was absolutely welcome at our annual Christmas gathering on Christmas eve. (So long as her SO was not in attendance) Given this relatively strict stipulation, she could not agree to leaving him at home alone last year, but this year, she came to me, as her sister, asking if I could talk to my dad about having her over for christmas.\n\nI spent the entire time trying to convince her that it would NOT be a problem and that, OF COURSE, she would be welcome to attend the family gathering. \n\nLow and behold.. my Dad is NOT okay with this situation. I spend an entire afternoon crying about this situation trying to deal with the estranged relationship that has developed between my dad and my sister. I can't come to understand why he could reject his eldest daughter this way.\n\nHas anyone else ever experienced a family disrepair around the holiday season that has worked out for the best in the end?? I feel so lost and helpless.", "summary": "Father does not want estranged daughter to attend Christmas family festivities. Sister (myself) feeling sad and unbeknownst as to how deal with the situation. Should family trump all?"}
{"id": "t3_1u0vls", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What do I [39 M] do with my concerns about my six month relationship with her [29 F]?", "post": "We're both going through divorces. We both have kids. We met on a dating site about six months ago. \n\nThe good: We share a lot intellectually. We \"get\" eachother on a lot of levels. Laughter, culture, even our vulnerabilities and issues. Plus, the sex is great. Really great. She loves me.\n\nThe bad: We don't have much time for eachother. Because of parenting and work etc., we rush to get in some time twice a week. My kids do not want anything to do with her. We tried a quick meeting and it went poorly. I don't like her kid, I don't appreciate her parenting. And it's awful to say, but I feel like I \"could do better\". (She's a bigger girl). She is more fun than classy, and I feel a little odd introducing her to family.\n\nThe problem: I feel like I don't have space in my life for her. It stresses me out to be around her kid, I'm on eggshells with my kids about her existence. I'm sliding on some things that are important to me in order to be with her (workouts, keeping the budget, housework). On the other hand, I wonder who else is going to love me. I don't want to lose her in my life because she's a really awesome person. And I would sorely miss the sex.\n\nMy issue: I don't know how to proceed. On one hand, I feel like I should break up. Even though she would even likely be open to a booty call based relationship, I don't feel good about that. I aslo don't want to hurt her. And the truth is I do love her. I just don't see anything changing to make this actually workable in the long run. Help?", "summary": "When it's not *perfect* do you break up, and how? Or do you just enjoy the occasional and small joys of the relationship, knowing that it's not sustainable?"}
{"id": "t3_3f0crl", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Girlfriend [19/F] and I [19/M] post fight isssues", "post": "I'll try to keep this as short and simple as possible. \n\nRecently my girlfriend of 6 months got a new job which takes up the majority of her time which leaves us with very little time together, yesterday was our first day together in about a week and everything was good, a few hours into the day she said she was going to leave early to hangout with a few friends, I was acting selfish and childish and got upset since I already see her so little.\n\nI regrettably yelled a bit and we didn't talk much at all until her friend came and got her, a few mintues before her friend showed up I apologized and we made up a bit but things were still kinda rocky.\n\nThe next day she had work so we didn't talk at all and when she got off I messaged her, and she was at a friend's house. I could tell something was wrong and I asked, she said that she wasn't happy after yesterday. I apologized and told her how much an idiot I know I was etc. The more we messaged the more serious it seemed to become, I asked if I could see her tomorrow before work so we could talk and she told me she didn't want to see me right now. She asked for a bit of space  so I stopped messaging her.\n\nI messaged her a few more times just apologizing and telling her I was worried which I probably shouldn't have done. \n\nI love her and don't want to lose her, and I know the consensus is on this sub is when someone ask for space things are done, which I don't agree with but maybe I'm just fooling myself.", "summary": "Girlfriend of six months and I got into a fight, was worse than I realized now she doesn't want to see me right now."}
{"id": "t3_3i1af2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] just got cancelled on for my second date by [18 F]", "post": "Hey guys. I met this girl at an event for incoming first year students. To make a long story short I got her number, we went out on one date a week ago which I think went pretty well (although it only ended in a hug which is fine I guess because I had only known her for a few days). We started texting/calling back and forth and she seemed into me (long thoughtful responses, exclamation marks, the odd emoji). I asked her out on a second date a week ago and she said yes. The date was set to be today, the day after our second freshman meetup so I texted her saying something along the lines of \"Aren't I lucky I get to spend two days in a row with you!\" to which she responded positively.\n\nOur second date was to be today, the day after another first year meetup. I wasn't particularly flirty with her at the meetup but when I got home I sent her a text saying something along the lines of \"I gotta be up early because I'm lucky enough to be spending the afternoon with a special someone! Night!\". A short while afterwords she said she couldn't meet up because her sister (who doesn't live with her, she lives alone) grounded her for not finishing her calculus assignments. When I asked her how her sister could ground her if she doesn't live with her she said \"she told her everything\". I'm not entirely sure if this is bullshit because she is really busy with this course she's taking (she was even doing work at the meetup last night). I said \"that's too bad some other time\". \n\nNow I'm not really sure what to do. I'm going on vacation tomorrow and likely won't be texting her and she hasn't texted me today. I don't know if I should text her tonight or just give up on her. I'm really not sure why I did wrong because she seemed really into me the night before the meetup. What do I do? Am I pretty much shit out of luck? Why has she suddenly changed her mind?", "summary": "Met a girl, went on first date and had a good time, seemed into me and got a second date but she cancelled with a lame excuse and haven't spoken since. What do I do now?"}
{"id": "t3_22pnqk", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Chronically swollen tonsil", "post": "So for the last 2-3 years I have had one tonsil that is always swollen. At first I assumed it was from smoking (I'm not a heavy smoker, maybe a few a day for several years, with plenty of week-long breaks) so I quit. It  got better but not completely better, it was still visible in the back of my throat while the other wasn't. I went to the doctor who prescribed antibiotics (which didn't do much). She said there's no reason to do anything  about it unless it's bothering me enough to want surgery. I probably should've mentioned to her  that I smoke but I didn't think of it at the time. I highly doubt  it's cancer though, I'm young and healthy other than the smoking (I know that sounds ridiculous  haha)\n\nSince then, I've been an on-and-off smoker (mostly during exams or nights of drinking) and sometimes my tonsil is fine but  other times, like right now, it gets really swollen and uncomfortable. I know that I should stop smoking and that's the plan, but for now can anyone offer  any ideas as to  what's causing this? Or any advice on how to reduce swelling? I've tried  gargling water, vinegar etc. without much improvement.\n\nI should mention I've had tonsilloliths before but have not had any (visible/noticeable)  ones in probably over a year.", "summary": "Tonsil has been swollen for the  past few years, gets worse with smoking. Wondering  what is the cause and what can do I do to improve it."}
{"id": "t3_txxai", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Not sure if the broken blood vessels near my eyes are from crying or vomiting.", "post": "F (early 20's) He's a little older. We broke up very very recently. It was completely mutual. It needed to happen. Trying so hard to adhere to the NC rule but I feel like 3 hours isn't enough time to end a 2 year relationship. Why can't we wean off of one another? Two friends had to nearly physically hold me back from driving to his house drunk last night because I got locked out and needed a place to stay.\nMy argument? What's one more night? Our last romp was quick and impersonal. The last night we slept next to eachother, we had no idea that was the last time. I can't stop crying. The few friends I have are nice, but Tullamore Dew is even nicer. I can't stop making myself puke after drinking. Help.", "summary": "It has to be a for sure thing, but what's one more night if it meant even just 6 hours of comfort amidst this mess?"}
{"id": "t3_1t9k1q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] and my boyfriend [23 M] of 4.5 years, disagree on marriage.", "post": "My boyfriend and I grew up in two very different homes. Mine was very conservative and his very liberal. \n\nAs with all couples, we find our upbringing influences our perception of how the world should be, including marriage. I want a wedding, nothing big or fancy, but a public declaration of together-forever and celebration with family and friends. He sees marriage as a legal binding that provides benefits financially and legally to a couple, but does not see that we are in any position to need those benefits at this time. If we were to marry under his belief in marriage, it would only be at a time of the greatest convenience and benefit. \n\nI can see where is coming from, love is love and the title of Mr. & Mrs. doesn't change those feelings (or at least shouldn't). I, also, know he understands where I am coming from, but we struggle to find an acceptable compromise. \n\nMostly just looking for advice or anecdotes from fellow redditors that have or have had non-traditional, long term relationships.", "summary": "Boyfriend and I have different ideas about why a couple chooses to marry. Looking for a compromise or at least camaraderie in this confusing situation."}
{"id": "t3_144k50", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit Do I Save My Dad's House Or Let Him Lose It?What would you do?", "post": "Long and short of it. My dad has been out of work for some time (diabetes among other things) and has not been able to stay current with his house payments. Fast forward he is now in bankruptcy and is more than likely going to lose his house in a little under a month if he does not come current on his house payments (about 15k). \n\nNow I have just enough money saved up so that I could pay off his back house payments but it would leave me with little to nothing left.\nMy concern is that if he does lose the house he would have nowhere to go because he does not have family that would take him in (I am not in a position to take him in), or the means to get a new house or even an apartment. In addition he has lived in the house 25 years plus so it means a great deal to him and myself sentimentally and I really don't want to see him lose it. \n\nI'm at a moral crossroads...My question is do I bail him out or let him lose the house? \n\nWhat would you do?", "summary": "Dad is going to lose house if he doesn't pay off debt, I have just enough to pay his debt. Do I pay it or let him lose his house?"}
{"id": "t3_1fmjfx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU On a field trip.", "post": "Actually a couple months ago. Forgot about it until now. I was on my school trip to DC, it was my first time going there so I was pumped. We went to see all of the main touristy attractions (this is day one) then lastly we go on this big yacht. It is pretty popular but I do not remember the name off of the top of my head. At this point I haven't slept for maybe 48 hours, as I can't sleep in vehicles and it is about an 8 hour ride down. I was sitting with my friend and looking out into the river, on the back of the boat. I lean over the railing and look down. My glasses decide to slide off my face. *Shit what do I do now?* I text my mom to tell her my new glasses just fell through the propeller of a huge boat and are now chilling in the Potomac. This was only at the start of the ride and I couldn't see at all for the rest of the time. Remember this is only day one out of two. I missed on seeing about half of the stuff, including Arlington, the Lincoln, Korean, and Vietnam memorials.", "summary": "dropped my new glasses through a propeller into a river on day one of two of a school trip that cost over $300 to go on."}
{"id": "t3_2jkqnb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24 M] girlfriend's [21 F] jealousy is getting out of hand.", "post": "Long story short, I moved in with my girlfriend back in July. Since then, my girlfriend has slowly been limiting my contact with certain friends (mainly girls). Some of these people are just acquaintances, but a few of them are incredibly close friends. \n\nRecently I tried to get in contact with one of my female friends, let's call her June. June's brother is in a rehab program, and I wanted to see how he was doing. While trying to get up with her, I discovered that June had been blocked on my facebook account. Not only that, but her number had been deleted from my phone.\n\nA little more investigating showed that not only was June removed from everything, but about a dozen other people (that I know of) were completely gone from my cell phone and all social media. \n\nFrankly I was overcome with rage at the fact that she would try to be so controlling. I think this might be the last straw, and I'm seriously considering ending the relationship. I don't want to do anything drastic just because I'm angry, though. I'd like to keep a cool head.\n\nWhat do you think I should do in this situation?", "summary": "My girlfriend went behind my back to try and control who I'm friends with. Should I break it off or give her another chance?"}
{"id": "t3_20wocx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my ex [19 F] of 8 months, she just broke up with me because of music", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for 8 months. It's been great. We fell in love and spent every waking moment together whatever chance we got. I met her family, she met my family, we've been on trips together... you get the idea. \n\nWell, lately, she's been demanding me to make compromises in everyday things (movies, hobbies, etc.) in order to appease her. Now I told her that who she's suggesting I be is just not 'me' and that I'm not comfortable with her dictating how I live my life. \n\nShe insists that she knows what's best for me and that I need to start living like an adult, whatever that means. In the meantime, she starts pushing her hobbies and media interests on me. \"No, let's listen to this\" she'll say in the car while we're playing the radio, or \"Why do you go to the gym so often? Stay home, babe, and watch New Girl with me.\"\n\nThis behavior is starting to aggravate me and I begin denying her requests. She starts getting more belligerent in her remarks and starts guilt tripping me, telling me \"You don't care about me, you're so inconsiderate to my feelings.\" \n\nAbout a week later I'm driving her home and she's playing some god awful pop radio station I've never heard of. I get this funny idea to play \"Kill You\" by Eminem on full blast while we're driving through the neighborhood because at this point I don't care anymore. She starts yelling something at me but I can't hear her over the music, plus I have the windows open. \n\nAll we hear is \"Sl*t, you think I won't choke no wh*re?!? Til the vocal cords don't work in her throat no more??!\". The look of resolve and assertiveness on her face dissolved completely, she was in horror and I was laughing my ass off. At one point she started screeching and assaulting me as I repelled her from the sound control panel. \n\nWell, I drove her home. She ran out while screaming at me and we haven't spoken since. I'm not sure how I feel about all this...", "summary": "Played Eminem on the car radio to piss off my straight edge gf, she freaked out and broke up with me. Not sure if I was an asshole or we had it coming or what."}
{"id": "t3_2uuz5f", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by misreading 2 words", "post": "Hi everyone, I joined recently and after reading the \"Not knowing what a potato was\" post, I remembered this and told a colleague, he told me to post it here since we always read TIFU.\n\nAnyways, this was about 2-3 years ago, I was driving behind a car that had a sign on the back which read \"Heritage Carpets\". there was a little space between \"Car\" and \"pets\" which wasn't too big to look like separate words but big enough to, as my colleague said, \"confuse you\". Me being stupid I read this as \"Car Pets\" and kept thinking and then laughing to wtf this meant, still not realising like a dumbass, I then take a pic so i can show my friends and have a good laugh.\n\nNow the reason for my stupid confusion was because of a car showroom near my area which I used to drive pass a lot and always look at what new car they displayed. The font and colours were similar and I just thought of \"Heritage Cars\" straight a way.\n\nSo after taking that pic, I met up with a friend and showed him the pic, i kept saying \"wtf is a Heritage CAR PET?\" and laughing, he gave me a weird look and said \" you mean carpets...?\"\n\nI felt so stupid, deleted the pic and tried to quickly move on from that subject, he laughed a little but then forgot about it. If it was the other way around I would have been lmao and telling everyone we knew about how dumb he was.... I was lucky it was him alone and not everyone else had met up yet.", "summary": "saw a sign reading \"Heritage Carpets\", read as \"Heritage Car Pets\", told a friend and looked stupid."}
{"id": "t3_2f89b4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(dating) Me [22M] with my girlfriend [22F] have started dating but her previous abusive relationship with my (ex)best friend has her jaded and tied to their history!", "post": "Throwaway obviously.\n \n\"Joy\" dated my friend \"Chad\" for three years. They lived together for 1 year but he was mentally abusive and threatening so they broke up halfway through that year. Living out of state, she had no choice but to live separately in the same apartment. It turns out he was stealing money from their joint bank account which was specifically for rent. She finally moves away but thanks to his shittiness, she's still financially stuck to the apartment.\n\nIt's been almost a year since they've broken up but she still has to deal with threats from the landlords and Chad is using that to try and keep contact with her.\n\nI started dating Joy about a month ago after talking everyday for a month before that. We had been crushing on each other before her and Chad with neither of us knowing the feeling was mutual. I have very little dating experience (another post in and of itself) and I don't know how to support her when she has so much pressure on her from her family ties, career ties, and this burden from Chad. I seriously want to make this work as this relationship had really been slowly building up for a long time but I'm scared it's doomed from its start. She doesn't want me \"fixing\" her and I don't want her \"fixing\" me but I want still want to be supportive despite us just starting.", "summary": "girlfriend still legally tied to abusive ex. How do I support her when we've just started? I'm mentally moving too fast but physically moving too slow for her but we can't focus on that with all the pressure in her life."}
{"id": "t3_3x0vfp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [M/21] be looking for a relationship of focus on myself?", "post": "I've been on vacation for a few days and it gave me some time to clear my mind  and give me some time to think about what I could do for me both in terms of self-growth and in terms of relationships.  \n\nI feel like I should lay low for a while and focus on me. I am overweight and want to lose a few pounds (hopefully starting before school starts up again in January) and do some things to make me more appealing because even though people think I'm attractive, I'm not considered attractive by a lot of the women at my school mainly because I don't have a six pack.  I also wanna be able to save up a bit of cash.  I have a little money but not a ton.  I'm a student with some bills and a job and wanna try to save a bit here and there when I can.\n\nOn the other hand, I wanna be able to make someone happy because I like making people smile and  I want to be able to make someone smile and show that I care about them because I like making people smile.", "summary": "I wanna focus on me, but also want to make someone other than me feel good.  What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3lw45p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Co-worker[F29] is leaving her job shortly. Should I[M26] pursue this?", "post": "So here's the situation. I've worked with my co-worker (Rebecca) for about 4 years now. We don't have the same job, but we regularly work together. We'll often start talking about work related stuff and then get side tracked talking about personal stuff for half an hour or longer. \n\nOver this time I developed feelings for her \u2013 we have a lot of similar interests and I really enjoy spending time with her. I haven't acted on them though, as I wasn't sure if the feelings were mutual and I didn't want to jeopardize our working relationship.\n\nRecently Rebecca has decided to quit her job in order to pursue some life goals that our company couldn't accommodate (sorry for being a bit vague here). \n\nSince she told me this, we've had a couple of conversations that lead me to believe that she might be interested in me. First of all, these conversations have been completely non-work related and the tone was a bit different (hard to explain). Secondly, a co-worker who sits near me overheard a bit of the conversation and said she was totally into me.\n\nThis along with some other stuff (she's called me her 'favorite <my occupation>' on more than one occasion) leads me to believe that she might be interested after all.\n\nOn the other hand, she's a very friendly person and we haven't really interacted outside of work and work functions.\n\nI'm very inexperienced in this domain, so am I crazy? I'm typically very oblivious about reading social cues, so I wanted a second opinion.\n\nIf I do pursue this, given that we already know a decent amount about each other, what's the best way to approach it? Is asking her out for coffee my best option here?", "summary": "I have feelings for a co-worker who is quitting her job and would like to ask her out before she leaves. Looking for general advice about the situation (is she interested? how should I approach this?)."}
{"id": "t3_2568o8", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "How to stimulate someone to be more motivated in life?", "post": "I am writing this on behalf of my parents because I am witnessing their suffering that my brother is causing. So here's a little background to the situation. My brother is 20 years old, out of school for 2 years and works less than 10 hours a week as a stock person at a local grocery store. His daily routine, when he is not working, involves either sleeping, gaming or hanging with friends where he disappears for more than 24 hours at a time. What he does with his friends is truly a mystery but my parents assume that he hangs with his friends to get high (marijuana mainly) which I can confirm, however I feel that I am not at liberty to snitch on him, at least at this point in time.\n\nMy parents and I have gotten into countless conversations/arguments regarding his poor habits as well as the more important topic of what he will do as a career that will allow him to be self sufficient. When these arguments do come up there is usually a large push back from him where he tries to pin the blame on my parents and will try to come up with any excuse to get out of the conversation. Simply put, my brother is lazy and unmotivated and it is because of this my parents are beating themselves up and are beginning to view themselves as failures as parents. With this, I am turning to the reddit community to seek advice to what my parents, as well as myself, can do to try to motivate my brother and push him off this unproductive path.\n\nAlso, it is important to add that my parents understand fully that people learn differently and realize that my brother is less of an academic and more of a hands on technical learner. They tried to use that to his advantage and enrolled him into a technical/trades based high school in hopes to allow him to find something that would interest him. My parents don't care what he does with his life as long as it is productive and he becomes self sufficient.\n\n[", "summary": "] My brother is lazy and unmotivated and down a path with no positive outlook. What can my parents (and myself) do to help him steer towards a path of productiveness."}
{"id": "t3_50hxvj", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Estranged Parents causing me grief, any advice?", "post": "A bit of backstory: \nGrew up in multiple countries as a child, my parents were rich socialites who only managed to have Sunday 'meetings/family days' with my brother and I, otherwise we were raised by maids. At 16, my brother got sent to boarding school in a different country. I was sent to a boarding school at 18. My brother and I were never close then and the idea of family was only something we saw on tv or in movies. \nFast forward to now, I have my own life, job, engaged to be married. My brother is doing really well and has his own family and baby. We reconciled over the lack of family growing up and have a good relationship now. Our parents become nothing more than distant and inconsistent Penpals. (I would always rag on them for never giving us any updates) They live in a different country so it's difficult to even call them sometimes. \n\nAbout a year ago, I received a call from my mother (we had not spoken in years) asking for a bit of cash for an issue they had run in to. Thinking they were in need, I caved and sent them money. I later found out my brother had as well. \nA month ago, I get an email from my mother explaining that my dad has had dementia for the past 2 years, they are in legal difficulties, kicked out of their house by the bank, too poor to afford food... it goes on. My brother and I scramble and send them money. My brother even went out of his way to make sure we weren't being scammed by some distant relatives. \n\nNow I am getting weekly text messages about needing money for food when she barely ever even wished me a happy birthday in the past. They appear to have estranged themselves to their friends since when I attempt to contact any of them, I get ignored. I sent them most of my wedding savings, which I now regret but I am not sure if that makes me a bad person for not wanting to help them more. I have refused the past two weeks to send anything due to having little to share. \n\nWhat should I do? Is it ok to turn them away?", "summary": "Estranged parents begging for money from their children who have barely heard from them in years. It's emotionally distressing :["}
{"id": "t3_llbj3", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Boyfriend and I broke up three years ago and he just told me he's still in love with me.", "post": "I dated this guy when I was fifteen, and he's just a few months older than I am. We dated for maybe six or seven months and then he cheated on me, so I broke it off.\n\nWe stopped talking completely for a year and a half or so and I was alright, I hadn't gotten too attached to him, so it didn't bother me a whole lot. After that point, he got in touch with me and we would talk (as friends) on and off for the next year. \n\nI stopped talking to him again about six months ago and now he's been texting me everyday for the last week. During one of the conversations we had he told me that he was still in love with me and that he hated himself for what he did. I told him that I was pretty much over it and that he should forgive himself too.\n\nHe's told me that the girlfriends he's had since then have all reminded him of me and that he has dreams about still dating me.\n\nI told him straight up that we can be friends, but I wont date him again. The only thing wrong with this is that now I feel like I've obligated myself to talking to him whenever he texts me, which opens me up to more conversations about a relationship that happened a really long time ago. It's just awkward and depressing, I feel like I'm holding him back from being happy.\n\np.s. When we have conversations over text, he still calls me sweetie, honey ect.", "summary": "I broke up with a guy, he's still in love with me. I think it's terribly awkward that we still talk."}
{"id": "t3_2q36iy", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Anything I can do about my parents using my identity? (Colorado)", "post": "My parents have opened credit cards in my name, without asking me, and I never found out until months later. \n\nNow I get hundreds of calls a week from companies about late payments that I am not responsible for. \n\nThey also forced me to take out $7500 in loans, which I didn't see a penny of, saying it would help the family. I was 19 and unemployed so they forced me to lie about having a job as well. \n\nMy credit is surely being ruined, as they are struggling so much that they literally cannot pay for any of the financial burden they put on me. \n\nLegally, is there anything I can do about this situation? I don't know anything about law, but isn't there a way they can relieve me of responsibility for paying these expenses, or something like that? Its not fair that I should get my credit ruined and possibly have to go bankrupt for money that I never borrowed.", "summary": "parents stole my identity to get credit cards and loans, now my credit is slowly crumbling, and I can't do anything about it because I am a 20 year old unemployed college student. What can the law do for me?"}
{"id": "t3_2z7hh7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My fianc\u00e9 [27m] broke up with with me [28f] tonight after 4 years of living together. I am devastated and lost.", "post": "I need some sort of advice. I'm sitting downstairs crying in the apartment I share with my former fianc\u00e9. He is upstairs asleep. We have built a life together and my wedding dress is hanging in the closet. I have no idea how to begin the process of dividing our shared possessions and bank accounts and frankly, I just want to crawl into a hole and never come out. \n\nHe ended it because he doesn't have the \"energy\" to put into salvaging our relationship, which was seemingly fine until this evening. \nWe argued in the past but have had no issues since September. He recently lost his job and we have been going through a rough time financially, but everything else has been great until now.", "summary": "I [28f] was just dumped by the man [27m] I have loved and shared a life with for the past four years. I have no idea how to move forward."}
{"id": "t3_ioozk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to approach sister about her married man...", "post": "So me 26f, sister 29f. \n\nI need some advice on how to approach my sister about her dating relationship. I need something better than \"WTF are you crazy?!\" I just learned from my sister that she's in a relationship with a married man. This sounds bad but it actually gets worse.\n\nWe've talked about guys before and I've never been thrilled with the people she's dated but this takes the cake. She hasn't told me everything, but what she has makes me very concerned. She says that she's in love with a married man. A married man who wants to be separated but is a coward about divorce and hasn't started divorce proceedings yet. He keeps saying he's going to and keeps trying to get reassurance that my sister will be there if he makes it official. \n\nThis \"great\" guy also offered to give her a child but to not marry her. This blows my mind. This guy sounds like a loser and somehow my sister isn't seeing this. The fact that he's cheating on his wife and the fact that my sister is often deployed in the Navy, which means she's not home for stretches at a time, makes me think that she's just his relationship on the side. \n\nI see a huge train wreck coming and I love my sister, but I don't know how to approach it without setting her on the defensive. She often believes that her opinion are right and everyone else's is wrong. I know I can't stop her actions, but I want to try and help her. I know anything I might say probably won't make a difference, but I have to try. She's my older sister and I love her, but she's always had issues with guys, probably stemming to the fact that her biological father abandoned her and my mother. \n\nSo.. any ideas on what to say? How to approach the situation without alienating her? How to somehow try to show her this guy isn't a good guy?", "summary": "Sister is in love with/having an affair with a married man who wants to give her a child. How do I tell her to drop this loser without alienating myself and making me seem like the enemy?"}
{"id": "t3_3sauvy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What is the best way to support him during what is likely to be a rough season? Me (22/F) my boyfriend (28/M)", "post": "My boyfriends dad passed away in early December of last year, before he and I even met. We met in late December/early January, and it actually took me a while to find out that that had happened (his friends told me, because they didn't want either he or I getting hurt). We started dating in the middle of February, and so far as I can tell from what he's told me and the interactions we've had, I don't think he's grieved much since that time, unfortunately we are also long distance most of the time because I'm attending college in a neighboring state. So, the anniversary of his dads passing will be coming up before I'm back in town for winter break (mid December to mid January). I also am not sure if Christmas is a touchy subject, I haven't really brought it up with him because he's never brought it up with me and I don't want to cause him to feel sad by taking about it and asking questions. \n\nIf it helps for advice, he and his father weren't very close, his dad was strict and my boyfriend was a pretty rebellious adolescent, so they were always at odds until my boyfriend got older and they understood each other a bit more. I also am slightly concerned that he feels a small amount of responsibility, for reasons that it's not my place to talk about. \n\nI've never had a close friend who has lost a parent, so I'm really lost on how to give him my support without dragging up a lot of pain. Thank you for any help you can provide.", "summary": "my boyfriends father passed away last year before we started dating, what's the best way to support him as the anniversary comes around this year?"}
{"id": "t3_4jukba", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my GF[25F] of 3 months, Not entirely sure if she is cheating...", "post": "My girl and I have been together for a few months now. However, there is a guy that she still is in contact with that worries me. This guy happens to be her ex LTR. She told me at the beginning of the relationship while we were in the dating phase that she had slept with him. I said I appreciate your honesty and we moved on and we are now exclusive. \n\nShe wants to remain friends with this guy and I told her I found it a bit weird. They were together for a long time and I don't think its my place to tell her who she can and cannot see. She told me anyway that she wouldn't be cutting him out of her life. \n\nI am aware that they are still in contact through social media and text. I had not been aware if they actually see each other but I had a strong suspicion they do during the week. I asked her about it and she came clean. They have been seeing each other platonically about once a week for the whole time we have been together. He is obviously still in love with her. The part that bothers me is that she didn't tell me they were actually hanging out. I think in her mind she covered it by telling me they were still in contact.", "summary": "not sure if what my gf is doing should be considered cheating? it kinda feels like it. Don't know if I am being over sensitive.."}
{"id": "t3_31fedk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my [23M] boyfriend. Problems with his ex.", "post": "I'll start by saying that I have two jobs, so I work a lot. One of them is a retail job, so I have a few customers who come in a lot and chat with me, and sometimes I go see them at our local arcade, and I hang out with them there when I see them. \n\nOne of the guys I met, Harvey, is really cool, and we have a similar interest in downhill longboarding. He told me I should come out and skate with our towns longboarding group. Being somewhat new to the area, I got excited to make new friends.\n\nTwo days later, I requested off of both my jobs (which was granted because I never ask for leave) to go skate. I then get a facebook message from Harvey, firmly uninviting me. It was because my boyfriend's ex, Jessica, is part of the skateboard group and said I'm not allowed to go. Harvey said I can come skate one day with a smaller group a friends another day. I didn't ask any questions, and just said okay. It really hurt my feelings at the time, but I'm over it now. This was a week ago\n\nHarvey came into my store yesterday, and apologized for what happened. He felt really bad. Apparently the day they went to go skate, Jessica just talked shit about me the whole time, even though I've never even met her. Whatever, right? \n\nBut then Harvey told me that Jessica was talking about hanging out with my boyfriend recently. My stomach dropped. I didn't want to seem caught off guard so I didn't ask any questions. \n\nI'm not a psycho controlling bitch. If he would have just told me, I wouldn't have minded. Now it seems really sketchy that he's hanging out with her without without telling me. I don't think he would cheat on me, but I still feel uneasy about all this and don't know how to confront him.\n\nI'm mostly posting here because I'm not sure how to confront him. There's a good chance he will freak out on me if I say something, so I really need advice on how to approach this situation.", "summary": "My boyfriend is hanging out with his ex behind my back. I do not know what to say to confront him about this situation. Also, she's kind of a bitch."}
{"id": "t3_4mm5gw", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(Ca) Real Estate agent flooded a room in our house for sale.", "post": "Mr parents put our house for sale and due to the relocation company were forced to stick with a set real estate company. Well long story short an agent showing the house did not go through it at the end and one of their clients turned on the hot water valve to the washer machine and never fully closed it, which lead to the flooding of our laundry room. Luckily, my mom decided to go back to California to look at the house that day or else the water would not have been discovered for another week eventually flooding the whole house. My parents never shut off the utilities, due to having a pool and wanting to keep the yard in tip top shape. Our real estate agent called the last few people to show the house and of course they all denied everything. Our listing agent agreed to put an electronic lock box on the house which never happened (would document the agents obtaining the key for the house). Our listing agent also made idiotic comments saying \"don't worry the water will just evaporate over night\" when clearly water seeped through the walls and most definitely up the dry wall. She also told my parents that they should just try to hide the damage and hope this wont effect the full offer on the house they accepted the night before the flooding was discovered. My parents doing the right thing had an inspection done and will end up costing my parents thousands out of their own pockets to get fixed.\n\nI doubt my parents are trying to pursue any legal action but possibly if they were what would they be able to do? At the very least is there a real estate equivalent to the \"BAR Association\" to which my parents could report or review both of the agents involved in this incident. They were wronged and do not want this happening to others.", "summary": "Laundry room flooded at the wrongdoing and neglect of our listing agents and other real estate agents showing the house. What legal route can my parents take to hold the ones responsible accountable."}
{"id": "t3_2tm65z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [ 19 F] w/ my Boyfriend [20 M] 2 years cheating finally getting over it now he wants to be friends w/ other girl", "post": "I reallt think i love him, and i think [am pretty sure] he loves me. We've been dating for around two years. on our anniversary we got in a fight because he told me he thought he was in love with a mutual-ish freind. i told him i wasnt sure we could keep seeing eachother if he felt like that.\n\n as the night went on i went home and he continued drinking.\nhe called her then picked her up they spent the night together although he was too drunk to sleep with her. he told me after a couple of days \n\nit hurt but ive slowly come to accept it was a mistake. but now he's saying he wants to call her go out for coffee apologize for not talking to her. they were good friends so i dont want to get in the way of his only female friend. but i think he still thinks hes in love with her. i can see how much it hurts him to lose a dear friend. but im not ready nor do i know if ill ever be to be okay with them seing eachother", "summary": "Boyfreind cheated was okay with it. but now he wants to talk to her they were good freinds so i dont feel okay saying no. but im really not okay with it yet"}
{"id": "t3_2wn68r", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I wish South Park would go back to its roots", "post": "I really think South Park has suffered in quality over the years as they have changed from extreme make believe stories that consisted of things like \"Celebrities becoming giant robots that can only be taken down by Leonard Maltin, Robert Smith and Sidney Poitier\" and other crazy scenarios.  Over the season they have moved to topical stories that involve flooding of an entire town to Debate over the political correctness of The Washington Redskins. \n\nI would kill to see SP come out with a season of nothing but outlandish creativity that brings the boys back to their innocence of asking a million questions of adults to which they cannot answer to alien probes coming out of Cartman's ass.", "summary": "I don't like the topical stories that South Park revolves around, I miss fanciful made up stories that could only happen in a cartoon that doesn't take itself too seriously"}
{"id": "t3_1d958b", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the worst event/series of events that happened to you that led to the most positive outcome?", "post": "In 2009 I was living in florida (I'm from the Midwest) and dating a girl. I planned to ask her to marry me. We were on our way to go on a boat ride a few hours north where I would propose. Exactly halfway between our home and the spot my truck died (the radiator blew) and we were stuck on the roadside for a few hours until a friend came and drove us the rest of the way. We went on our boat ride and she said yes. A month later I was fired from my job. I went home and had a party I had planned a few weeks ago. The next morning she broke up with me and went back to her home in Wisconsin. I drove to my familial home in Iowa to collect myself and get on track. A few weeks later I woke up to find that my dog (my best friend for several years) was unable to walk. He had a spinal embolism and would be unable to walk the remainder of his life. I made the toughest decision of my life and had him put down. I spent a few months working on my family's farm in Iowa. I then went to see my parents for Christmas in MA. I met an amazing women (my younger brothers best friend) and fell in love.\n\nThat was three years ago. Today she is three weeks from graduating college, I have a fantastic job, and we are planning to be married. \n\nI can't help but feel that if the radiator hadn't blown I wouldn't be here today.", "summary": "truck died, lost job, fianc\u00e9 left, dog died. Met girl of my dreams and am happier than I could have ever imagined. "}
{"id": "t3_1go7hx", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Why do I always feel like my relationships aren't good enough?", "post": "Hi Reddit,\nI've been in a bunch of relationships on my day. (Male, 29 this year) and I'm starting to wonder why I get to the point where I feel like I want something new, or some girl catches my eye that I can't get out of my head or want to get to know her well enough to date. \n\nI have been in a bunch of 3 month, 2 yr, 5.5yrs before my current gf of 1.5yrs and they all seem to come up the same. I was an asshole before and cheated during some of the previous ones in my younger days but told myself I wouldn't anymore because it's not fair to them. \n\nBut the feeling of getting out and being with someone new always creeps in and ruins my feelings for my current gf. I love her and care for her but don't know if I should stay, go or figure out what's wrong and try to fix it.  \n\nI guess I'm asking if anyone has had the same thing happen or knows what I might be doing wrong or how to change my way of thinking. I feel like maybe I should just not get into a relationship anymore as it doesn't fully make me happy because it ends,or starts to end this way.", "summary": "Every relationship I have I always feel like I want a new girl no matter how in love I feel with the girl I'm with. "}
{"id": "t3_3wtl5n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[26M]cut off my family but now my dad is trying to force me to make contact.", "post": "After a fight and a verbal and mental attack on my wife[25] and I, I cut off my narc/manipulative mother[50s], enabler father[50s], golden child/narc sister[30s]. This fallout has been a lead up of about 3 years of back and forth, the actual fallout happened on my birthday after I didn't want my sister to watch my son one day.\n\nMy wife and I bought a new house and moved, I changed my phone number but today my dad texted my wife saying I need to call my mom, the doctor ordered immediate ultrasounds and not to let potentially her last Christmas be without her son.\n\nI am still seeking counseling and therapy, I finally feel accepted I need it and I don't think I am ready to open up conversations again... but what if he is right?", "summary": "Cut off family, dad texted saying I need to talk again because something could be wrong with my mom and it could be her last christmas"}
{"id": "t3_3fgip1", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Found this little bird stuck between a rock after my dog tried to kill it. It fell from it's nest... Can I do anything more for him?", "post": "This ( is the little bird I found. After freeing him and trying to return him back into his nest, the nest and baby were back on the ground 10 minutes later.\n\nI currently have him gated off on my porch, where there's shade -- still with the nest the mother had built. In keeping an eye on him, it seems like the mother came by and fed him in this location and I'm a bit worried about moving the nest repeatedly.\n\nSince I have dogs, I can't leave the nest there without the gate -- they would attack him again if they could get to him, but a few places advised in the stage that this bird looks to be in, it's capable of being out of the nest and will learn how to hunt/fly on it's own that way... Would I be hindering it by keeping it in behind a child gate where it can't, obviously, do these things?", "summary": "Found older looking baby who fell twice from nest. Placed baby gate around it on porch to prevent more falls/protect from my dogs. Is that the best place for it?"}
{"id": "t3_3cmv8i", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "I fell of the track and my mom overstepping her bounds got me back on.", "post": "in March~ I started working at a walmart, to save up money for graduate school. working there, specially now that school is over has resulted in very odd hours. Thus, i eat whenever I can and whatever I can find. Before I was working, i found it easy to stave off hunger, cause all I was doing it was sitting around at home. When i was just doing college, I would eat at like...11:00 and then at 5-6. Totally doable. Now its like, I work in the middle of the day for 8 hours then, im back in at 7:00am, it threw me off.\n\nAnywho, before i started there, I was somewhere around 170-172, down from a high of 350+ within a year. Now im like...184 (weighed myself yesterday when I noticed a shirt was a bit tight. I knew I needed to get back on track and fix this, but tonight sealed it for me. My mom was about to go to bed and told me good night, but before leaving she GRABBED MY STOMACH and said \"getting a bit of a belly back, aren't you?\".\n\nI freaked out, felt she totally overstepped her bounds and chewed her out, she didn't seem to know what the problem was. But that was also the wake-up call I needed. Tomorrow (its 11:23pm) its back to clean eating, no deserts/shit food....period. If I have to stand around hungry for a few hours then so be it.", "summary": "mom grabbed my stomach, called me a fatty. Feel like she overstepped her bounds, but i'm glad she did."}
{"id": "t3_2elg36", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my casual relationships in college.", "post": "Hey relationship redditors,\n\nI have a quick and intriguing question about relationships in college. What would you do in this situation? It is kind of awkward once I really think about it. Here's my short story. \n\nI'm 20 years old in college. In our college's honor program enjoying life and utilizing my brain to the highest capacity. I've met some really cool people over the couple years at my college. I wasn't too interested in girl's at first, however I am comfortable around them now. I wasn't before. I still am a little reserved, but that's all worked out now. I've changed up my lifestyle and negative habits and I'm in college to be a doctor! Only black man in my honors philosophy course and everyone else is white. Representing the black community! We need to represented in these sophisticated classes! XD\n\nAnyway, I knew this really nice girl from last semester. We met in the hall after a random instance. I don't know how we got to know each other, but anyway I really like talking to her. However, she told me that she's not too interested in doing anything out. Like going out. She's pretty comfy where she's at now and doesn't want to date. She told me that she liked me, but doesn't want to do that type of thing. It's pretty understandable.\n\nShe has a sister and I can sense that she really likes me! 0.o. It is a weird feeling, but all I do is politely bob my head to say hi and she really lights up when she sees me. And I ended up eating lunch with her. It was a really good meal and we have similar interests. She's a vegetarian and was on a cleanse and ate some really good looking salad! That alone was very admirable! Because I thought, \"wow that's exactly what I'd do!\" She kind of hinted and have me good vibes, but I could be wrong.", "summary": "What do I do? Should I get the second girl's digits somehow even though she is related to a girl that is not interested? Stay aqaitances?"}
{"id": "t3_26e8ii", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] after [22F]- Commitment Issues", "post": "Hey so I've known this girl about a month now, shes really nice we like alot of the same things we get along well together, the first few weeks we talked alot hung out once just the two of us and twice with her friends at the bar we met at, one of the times her friend approached me and asked if I liked this girl and I said I did and I find her interesting, to which she replied that I should make a move and we didnt have this conversation\n\nWe got outside and I didnt really make a move but after a long hung we both sort of just went for a kiss and ended up making out, anyway since then a few things happened in her life, she was ill and her close friend ended up losing somebody etc, Ive been very understanding offering my support just as you should, one other time we hung out we sort of had a small heart to heart I told her about my ex and everything ive been dealing with and shes sorry ive been having to deal with that.\n\nI saw her out last night and we just generally chatted a little bit but she left because her and her friends were tired, I wanted to say to her face but because she left I couldnt so instead of just text her saying I thank her for being there to listen to me talk about my ex because its been hard and she said its fine shes everybodys vent at the moment, I went onto say thats not exactly what I meant I said that she actually cares and shes fantastic and its hard to find in people these days.\n\nShe went onto say that this is why she avoids ruining things, when I questioned her about that she simply said, she has commitment issues, so many of her friendships have been ruined from getting close, so she panics.\n\nIm just not sure where to go from her, shes the first person ive actually felt attracted to since my ex girlfriend, I think she does like me shes just afraid to make that next step incase it messes up another good friendship, any advice would be great!", "summary": "Boy meets girl, get along together, makeout, heart to heart, girl too afraid of commitment values friendship of friends alot, not sure if next step on the cards?"}
{"id": "t3_2nvbwd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My gf (19f) is giving me (19m) a red flag and should I be worried?", "post": "So me and my gf have been dating for 6 months and last night she went to a bar with some of her friends. I couldn't go since I had college work to do.\n\nI text her later in the morning saying good morning. I tell her I'm glad she made it home safe and how was the bar. She said it was fun. I tell her \"ohh cool what happen?\" I always ask how her day is and what happens, so this isn't new. She said \"lots\" and then I ask \"like what?\".\n\nShe tries being cute with me and tries telling me she won't tell me and saying hehe. I go along with it for awhile, but then I ask again. This time she gets defensive and asks why? I tell her \"cause we usually talk about our day and what happens. I don't see why you can't tell me.\" Then she goes quiet and it's been 4 hours since she texted me.", "summary": "Girlfriend went out with friends to bar and when asked what happened she got defensive. Should I be worried or is this a red flag?"}
{"id": "t3_391ded", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm[22F] too passionate and it's getting in the way of my relationships", "post": "Throwaway and on mobile. Not sure how to tag on mobile. \n\nI have had multiple partners break up with me because I'm \"too passionate\". Multiple partners have told me that, when things are good, things are amazing. But when things are bad, they're the worst situations they've ever been in.\nThe last two guys I've dated broke up with me within a month because I had gotten into fights with them at least twice in that time frame. The worst part? I didn't even realize we were fighting because we weren't screaming at each other (this happened a lot in my first relationship. Hasn't really happened since then because I now realize how destructive that behavior is and am much better at communication my feelings). I really do my best to modulate my behavior but something small will happen, I'll be upset, and then I won't/can't get over it. I've had constructive talks with my exes and the best advice they could give me if that they hope I'll find someone who likes my combative side. But I don't like that side of me. \n\nI obviously have a problem if multiple partners have had issues with me and they all said very similar things. This only really happens with romantic partners. I'm not sure why my platonic relationships don't have this problem. What can I do?", "summary": "my relationships are amazing until I have a mood swing and then it's complete shit. Then it will swing back. I feel helpless because I've ruined otherwise amazing relationships."}
{"id": "t3_3wjnf6", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by charging my phone (nsfw)", "post": "I I remember correctly I was 19 and my girlfriend 18 at the time, and we took a few slightly scandalous pictures of each other. (This will come into play) and my mom worked a combination desk/ running around helping do stuff job. I would often sit in her office with her and read a book, or run around and help her help do stuff. \n\n \nThis day was a day like any other except my iphone was a little low on batteries. My mom has a nifty little iphone charging chord dangling from her, work assigned, MacBook so I just go ahead as plug my phone into her computer. The computer does it's thing and asks if I want to download all I my pictures, and music, and get all of the updates that I haven't gotten in the last ten years and my mom just sort of flips it around with a sigh so I can push all the buttons I want to push because at this time in our lives, as well as now, I was better a tech than her. \n\n \nRemembering that I've got my unprofessional personal photos on my phone I request to NOT upload any pictures or music, and just to be safe DONT update my phone. And that was the end of it, or so I thought. \n\nDun dun DDUUUNNN!\n\nI get a call a few days later from my mom \"PROFESSOR! YOU LEFT NUDES ON MY COMP!\" So I rush to her office to see what the hell happened and find that she had a second program, this was a few years ago so I don't remember what it was, that didn't ask if you waned your photos uploaded, it just assumed you wanted it. \n\n \nShe had closed her computer at the first glance of glorious girl meat (I know she's a woman too, she was jut being polite) and let me delete the photos. Thankfully, the only picture that was on the screen was from the waist up, one of our less scandalous screenshots.", "summary": "unintentionally showed off my girlfriends boobs to my mom by charging my phone, which I wrote this story on 3 years later, sorry about formatting."}
{"id": "t3_2fnth6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Did I [19M] treat my ex [17M] wrong?", "post": "I was recently dumped, about three days ago, after weeks of begging my ex not to do it. She had had a thing for me since third grade and we started dating two years ago in highschool. Things were pretty okay, but we did take one three week long break. In that break she started flirting with someone else, and it was awful. We did, however, get back together. That was about a month ago. \n\nNow for the past few weeks she has been dancing around the idea of breaking up with me and I have always plead with her not to. I told her I would never talk to her again, never see her again, that I would never give her another chance, and that I would start talking to someone else, because that's exactly what she did to me. After two weeks of telling her all this about once or twice a day she did it anyway. Today she told me about how she wanted me back, but I told her I was talking to a few other girls at this point. Her exact words were \"Fuck you, have a good life.\"\n\n I feel horrible about this whole thing, we haven't had the HEALTHIEST relationship, but it's still one I never wanted to end. We both had our faults; she would get mad at me for just having friends that were girls, but I'm a very social guy and like to make new friends. I would get mad at her for always delving WAY too deep into everything we ever talked about. (An example of this would be: My ex got upset with me for talking to this one girl, Girl B, purely as a friend, who lived about an hour south of me. I told her that was fine, I would just stop talking to Girl B, again purely as a friend. My ex then got mad at me for \"still wanting to be friends with  Girl B\", and threatened to break up with me so I could \"Finally go be friends with more people.\") I want to fix things but at the same time, I'm worrying that things will never get better.", "summary": "Ex girlfriend and I fight a lot, but I don't want to give her up and I want to work things out with her."}
{"id": "t3_10gzud", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Very stressed about my major and the possibility of changing. (x-post from r/AskReddit)", "post": "I have been in school to get a Bachelors of Science in communication through my school's film/video program. I have always had a love for story telling and filmmaking. \n\nHowever, more and more I realize that I am a storyteller first, and a filmmaker second. I have no desire to be in production. The two things I love are creating a story in pre-production and editing that story in the editing room during post-production. I have no *real* intention on being at production. I have been contemplating whether or not to switch my major. I haven't looked into it, but I know it will push me back at least a year (I am a junior). I am on my own as far as paying for my school and housing. I am worried switching my major is not a good choice, or even feasible without piling on more debt. \n\nOn the flip side, I love to write, I love making up stories and I can see myself doing this for the rest of my life. I could also say the same about post-production in film though.\n\nI was hoping to get some advice on what the best way in figuring out what exactly is best for me to make the best decision for me. Maybe some of you have been in a similar experience and can shed some light on the issue from your perspective. \n\nThank you for reading, and I hope someone can help.", "summary": "I love telling stories but am at a cross on whether I want to go into Filmmaking/Film editing(what I have spent 2 years in school on so far), or switch to writing."}
{"id": "t3_24zqvd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 M] have a great GF [23 F] but cannot forget another girl (not even an exGF), please help.", "post": "Hey guys and girls,\n\nTo give a short summary, I had a long relationship since early teens, but it ended after 8 years, so I was 23 or so with no real dating experience. \n\nStarted dating, had a few girls, but there was one kind of special, lets call her Alice. I was totally into Alice, she was into me too but I completely f*cked that up, being too afraid to get physical and acting insecure. I do not know exactly what happened but one day Alice just stopped communicating with me. I tried a few times to get in touch again but she did not respond, so I blocked her on basically everywhere to stop me from writing to her (and it worked).\n\nIt has been more than a year since, I dated more girls since and found a GF, we are great, but sometimes I just cannot help my brain thinking about Alice. I did not try to get in touch with her (and I do not want to), it just feels weird and bad that sometimes I still think about Alice even though she was not really a GF and I had girls before and after Alice that I got way farther with (relationship-wise and physically) and I do not think about those at all.\n\nCan you please give me any advice on what to do about it ? Let me just point out I love my current GF very much. Thanks a lot.", "summary": "I have a great GF, we live together for almost a year now, but I cannot forget a girl I was on few dates with who just stopped communicating."}
{"id": "t3_4nnyn5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] with my GF [14 F] 1 Month, Causing her future problems?", "post": "First of all: this is an actual problem, not a childish cry;\n\nSecond: she's actualy not my GF, you see, english is not my mother language, that said, i don't know the exact word for someone i've been going out, but not dating;\n\nSo, a year ago i broke up, cause my GF chated on me, from that day i started a \"Pick up, don't fall in love\" way of living, lost my virginity in this road, now, a month ago, i started talking with this girl (later got to know that i had flerted with her some weeks before, and we had some contact in our childhood) and we started going out.\n\nRecently, things got more serious, as she came in my house, and we almost did it, twice, but tonight i thought, i know that we have small chances of lasting long, i mean, if all goes acording to plan, in a year and a half, i'm going to college, states away of my little town, and if i pop her cherry, she may have future relationship problems.\n\nNow, i'm pretty worried, after all that time, i'm feeling something (ain't that sure i'm in love, more of liking, a lot) and i'm worried of keep going and causing future problems to her.", "summary": "I'm liking someone after a long time, and afraid of causing problems to her if we reach th 4th base (base talk sounds childish)"}
{"id": "t3_4c5nza", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "25F brokenhearted over the loss of 22M", "post": "We were together for over 2 years. We started as friends and then started hooking up when neither one of us was ready for a relationship. We had a really great connection and were so comfortable around each other that after a year we had both fallen for one another. Even though we said we were not going to be official boyfriend/girlfriend we both agreed that we were in an exclusive relationship. \n\nHe recently cheated on me and I forgave him enough to try to remain friends. He has continued to see the girl, who was initially a random. I know that it is normal to be hurt and confused and that the best thing to do may be to just walk away completely. But I know if I do, then he will respect my wishes and be gone for good. I have yet to be able to bring myself to pull that trigger, although I do think about it often. He has even recently told me that he feels like he is juggling the two of us and I told him I don't think that is something he should be feeling or doing especially if he is over us and we are just friends. \n\nI just don't understand with everything we had how he can just run to someone else so quickly. I understand the concept of a rebound, but it just seems so cowardly to me. So I am emotionally dealing with all of it and he is just distracting himself and not dealing with any of it. I lost my best friend and my relationship and I just cannot focus or feel less sad. I think that he is young and was not ready to be as serious as we were emotionally, because we never planned for that to happen, and now that there are other people that are interested in him, he is wanting to just play around and have fun. Just feels awful that I had to be the casualty in all of this and that I wasn't enough. Is it possible for us to ever be okay with each other and be okay again? I think this was more of an outlet that actual call for advice, I'm not so sure there is great advice, but I am surely all ears.", "summary": "got cheated on and said we would still be friends. The guy is still seeing the girl he cheated with. Will we be able to be friends?"}
{"id": "t3_3bh03l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my ex-GF [22 F], has anyone every broken up and gotten back together successfully?", "post": "My girlfriend and I just split a few weeks ago. I'm past the initial grieving pain but I just feel like our break up was a mistake in big picture sort of way. I've dated a lot and I have never felt closer or more at home with anyone else. I really think of her as my soul mate on many levels. If I had to say why we broke up I would say it was a breach of trust. There wasn't one big incident like cheating or anything, it was more of a long haul of small mistakes that left it hard for us communicate without being defensive. We had a pretty huge breakdown of communication at the end. We got into some bad habits and weren't able to break them, even though we were aware of them and actively tried to. I know that I can't hold onto her just because I have hope for the future, but I want to believe that once we give our wounds some time to heal, we might be able to come back to it with a fresh slate. Is this something that is totally illogical? Thanks.", "summary": "exgf and I split, I feel like it was a mistake. Any chance couples get back together and work it out?"}
{"id": "t3_2j4oxo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Work conflicts leading to decreased communication in new relationship.", "post": "I am a 23 year old female who has been seeing a 23 year old male for the past couple months now. We live an hour apart so don't get to see each other much in the first place. He recently was switched to 12 hour night shifts 7 days a week. Now we can't talk much let alone see each other. I'm worried that this will put our relationship in a standstill or cause him to change his mind about having a relationship with me. I really like him and see this turning into a really good long term relationship. I also miss him :( Has anyone else been in this situation? Any advice on how to keep the relationship active and growing?", "summary": "23F dating 23M who works 12hr night shift 7 days a week. How do I keep the relationship active?"}
{"id": "t3_4jssza", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "It's time to move out. How to confront my parents?", "post": "Dear reddit,\nlet me explain the situation. I'm living together with my parents & my brother. We're living in a relativly tiny village. Since almost 2-3 years we all can feel that the communal life lost it's sparkle. Our interests spread apart (which is ok & somehow inevitable), the motivation to take an interest in another is low too. \nLast year I finished my school education. After that I started a voluntary service for 1 year, which will end in a few months. Therefore I need to start (actually already started) to look out for an apprenticeship/study. My parents  are making suggestions where I could start and it's always something where I could keep living at home cause it's not far away. But that's not something I want... I want to live alone. I want to move out and start my own life. I just don't feel comfortable anymore at home. \nMy parents know I would like to go somewhere else, they know it's my dream to finally start my own life, they know it but I'm sure they refuse to believe it cause they always come with silly excuses when I'm starting to talk about that topic. My mom always ignores all my intentions to make things clear. She doesn't take it really seriously. My dad once told me that's because she doesn't want to let me go, but hey I can't be her little boy forever.  \n\nHow can I explain them that I'm serious and not just dreaming?  Does someone of you had a similiar situation? \n\nOf course I love my parents and I know they love me but it's time to move out, it would be the best for me and they would benefit as well.\nSorry for some inaccuracies, feel free to ask anything.", "summary": "Unhealthy familiy atmosphere -> I want to move out for a job/ start own life. -> Parents not amused. -> What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2cbdvs", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by jokingly asking my girlfriend to message me a shirtless pic", "post": "Hey there. I am a 15 year old boy who miraculously has managed to keep a girlfriend for nearly 8 months now. I love her very dearly.\n\nAbout two hours ago I decided to sent her a picture of myself in pajama pants just before going to bed. After she responds I say, \"Do you feel obligated to send a complimentary shirtless picture back?\". Normally, I would never say this seriously. It was just a joke, and I thought she saw that. \n\nJokingly, I push the request a bit. After that bit she isn't responding so I let her know it was all a joke. She didn't find it funny; she thought I was being real.\n\nShe has been mad and crying while I have been trying to clean after my insensitive, dick move. I was actually quite astonished to see her respond this way and this harshly. For the past hour I have been apologizing, and I have been trying to console her. Nothing has been helping.\n\nIn the end I feel horrible, regretful, helpless, and disgusted with myself.", "summary": "I joking ask my SO to send me shirtless pics, she thinks I was serious, gets mad, cries, I ~~feel like~~ am a huge smelly butt."}
{"id": "t3_1iqkam", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Myself, [15M], and a wonderful young, [14F] have just confessed our feelings for each other. I don't know how to handle it.", "post": "So the deal is, we have told each other the truth. However there are some complications:\n\n1. She is a family friend, our next door neighbours' granddaughter. Her father her sister, and herself all come down to visit for 3-4 weeks every summer.\n\n2. Her father is slightly over protective. On a scale from 1 to 10 I'd say 5.\n\n3. Her sister [16F] goes practically everywhere with her. There is no alone time.\n\n4. We live in different states, as I said previously, she comes to visit every summer. However, she lives in Georgia and I live in California.\n\nI haven't been in a relationship before and I know one as complicated as this doesn't come up often. Any ideas as to how to make this relationship work? If anyone is wondering she is leaving homeward in 10 days. Any ideas?", "summary": "Two young-ins confess feelings to each other, can never be alone, only with each other for a few weeks every summer."}
{"id": "t3_2s86oy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with the girl I like [18 F], she gets annoyed easily! Someone give me advice?", "post": "Im going to meet a girl im crazy for at the minute, we planned this a few weeks back and she was so excited to see me! Im gonna be staying in her flat!\n UNTIL, these past few days shes being a bit weird, she has gotten a bit annoyed at me for no apparent reason, she says she doesnt love me anymore and doesnt want to do anything when i go meet her tomorrow. You can probably guess how im feeling now! \nShe isnt annoyed at me at the moment but i feel like ive done something wrong but cannot seem to think what it is! Im not in it for the sex im in it cause i love the girl to bits, she makes me happy! How do i go about tomorrow when i go see her?", "summary": "Girl is like is angry at me for no reason! What do I do when I finally meet her tomorrow to make her love me?"}
{"id": "t3_gsowb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The lady had an accident, led to unexpected trust issues.", "post": "I am a 36 year old male, the lady is 43 and our kids are in their pre-teens in elementary/primary school (grades 1-6 here). We've been together since the mid 90:ies.\n\nAbout four years ago she got hit by a car at a pedestrian crossing (drivers fault), leaving her hospitalized for half a year and with permanent brain damage. This was of course a big, unwanted change for the whole family leaving us all shaken. She is now rated with 15% disability, but is working in IT at the same workplace as before. (She chose to, she was entitled to retirement but couldn't stand sitting at home.)\n\nDuring the years that has followed I have noticed that love is over, to put it simply. After a lot of sorting of my feelings I have found that I don't trust her any more. Trust is the most important feeling in a relationship, so no wonder things have gone downhill. Apparently my subconscious has decided that she can't be trusted, as she got herself run over. I'd like to think of myself as a rational human that understands that she has done absolutely nothing wrong and deserves all the respect, love and trust as ever before, but no. This feeling of untrust can't be defeated with rational thoughts, and the struggle between my morals (keeping the family together) and my feelings is really getting to me.\n\nIf anyone has been in a somewhat similar situation, how did you cope and was it possible *or not* to get the relation back on track? How was things resolved?\n\nAnyone with any piece of advice is of course welcome to answer.", "summary": "Asking for advise on struggle between morals as a family man and unfair lost feeling of trust in a relationship where the woman was disabled in an accident."}
{"id": "t3_3aje4g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] don\u00b4t truly love my gf [20F] of 3 months, but everyone seems to believe I do?", "post": "Hey everyone,\n\nFirst of all, I\u00b4d like to ask if this that I\u00b4m going to tell you is a \"normal\" procedure to you. I\u00b4ve had three serious relationships, and when I realize I may not be in love anymore, I usually do the same thing over and over again.\n\nI\u00b4m a very caring person, I love to make my girlfriend feel like she is the luckiest and happiest person alive, treating them with respect, care and giving them the most of me. So, for everyone outside the relationship, it may look obvious that I\u00b4m completely in love with my gf. \n\nWhat happens is, at some point I start realizing that I don\u00b4t truly love her (I guess I\u00b4m still growing on this, as when get into a new relationship, I can understand things better clearer than before), and I have a really hard time with letting the girl go, as I, by that time, have the deepest connection and the greatest relationship with her. \nSo what I do is, I keep being a \"great boyfriend\", and I let the relationship last beyond reasonable, and keep all the obvious feelings and thoughts of lack of love to me. \n\nOf course the relationship eventually ends, but I\u00b4d like to last, do any of you have trouble with letting go, and with having to be reasonable towards your SO? As I\u00b4ve said, I honestly feel like I\u00b4m a great boyfriend, but keeping those feelings of \"this is not true love\" only for me is obviously disrespectful, in the long term, towards my SO.", "summary": "Do you also have trouble letting go someone who is deeply connected with you, and has a great relationship with you, but whom you don\u00b4t love anymore?"}
{"id": "t3_3dukjq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Relationship ended abruptly (23 M)", "post": "I've had a great relationship over the past few months with a coworker of mine. We have texted nonstop and hung out around a dozen times. We really clicked with each other unlike any girl I have met before. \n\nAbout 2 weeks ago, her attitude changed. After being extremely warm and sweet, she started picking on me. I called her out on it and she immediately ceased communication with me. We had a brief conversation where she said she could only be coworkers and not friends. I gave her a few days to get over it and then asked her if she could let go whatever I did wrong and I apologized, even though I don't know what I did. She told me not to contact her anymore and then the next day reported me for harassment at work. I showed my managers our texts so they know I didn't harass her but they told me not to text her anymore unless it is work related.  \n\nI am pretty crushed by this sudden change. I can't believe someone would try to get me fired when we were so close. I really don't know what I did wrong. Any advice?", "summary": "After an incredible 2 month friendship, it ended abruptly for no discernable reason and she has tried to get me fired."}
{"id": "t3_3hmbbh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help me [17/M] understand I don't need my ex's [17/F] affection", "post": "I was in this 5-6 month long-distance relationship over a year ago with a girl I met online. We talked 24/7, I used to visit her every month and I thought she was the love of my life. Only recently did I realise I did not actually like **anything** about her as a person, other than the fact that she *loved* me. She was far too self-centred, sometimes mean and rather immature. She hurt me emotionally a lot, making me jealous and stuff. We broke up in the spring of 2014.\n\nFast forward to this summer: we hadn't talked at all, other than quick Facebook chats every few months that lead to nowhere and a few drunk calls from either one of us. Last month, we met where I live and she stayed at my place for a couple of days (I live alone). We felt great together, had an amazing time and were on good terms when she left. She even said she still loves me.\n\nWe then ended up getting into another fight over a T-shirt she **stole** from me (I would suggest she's crazy, but maybe I'm overreacting) and we stopped talking.\n\nNow, I ask you, why the hell do I still care? Why do I sometimes think of her, when it's clear even to me now that I don't like anything about her? It might be just because I haven't been emotionally close to anyone else in the past 18+ months, haven't hugged anyone properly, haven't had anyone else reciprocate these feelings of simple human affection. Because I think that's what I need \u2013 affection. And I think I associate that with her, which is wrong.\n\nHow do I get over this? How can my brain fully understand that I don't need **her** affection?\n\nI've been reading about Buddhism and pretty much the underlying principle of Buddhism is that you should get rid of attachment, be that to people or things. What are your suggestions towards that?\n\nI clearly do not want or need a romantic relationship, so what can I do to get rid of these wrong feelings?\n\nHopefully I managed to explain everything well enough.", "summary": "Stupid teenage me thought I loved ex-GF, now I realise I only needed affection and that I don't need her for that, but I still associate her with that feeling. Help me get my feelings/thoughts straight."}
{"id": "t3_2pbten", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Asking for a raise, should I be specific or no?", "post": "So I got my review and most of the areas had \"above average.\" I'm apparently an \"asset to the company\" and I was recommended to be in a leadership role in 2015.\n\nI know I have to ask for the raise, they wont be just giving them out. I want a 20% bump. Considering when I started they said they were going to pay me a little low because I was brand new in this field, and now i'm going from unskilled entry level to skilled entry level, I feel like it's justified. Also, i've busted my ass the last year.", "summary": "Tomorrow I will be giving the boss a letter requesting the raise. Do I put 20%? Do I put a dollar amount? Do I just request the raise and let them decide what they're going to give me? "}
{"id": "t3_z86ja", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a pretty small guy[17yo] and I really like this taller girl[17yo]. So small men and tall women of reddit, what are your thoughts on taller women relationships?", "post": "We met on the internet, not through a dating website but through mutual friends on facebook and we have been chatting and skyping for 2 months now. She lives an hours drive from me so we haven't met in person yet. I am a shorter guy(5'7) and she is a taller girl(5'10). We share many common interests but i'm quite self conscious about my height having been teased about being behind on the growth curve my entire life . She wants to meet up in person soon but I feel kind of emasculated about being shorter than her. Do any other short men share this feeling?", "summary": "I am 5'7 she is 5'10. We mutually like each other but I feel slightly emasculated by the situation :/"}
{"id": "t3_4ee0dc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23F] BF [28M] is embarrassed that I don't have a degree yet", "post": "I'm still working on my degree online while I work full time as a pilot. My boyfriend of 2 years and I live together and split everything 50/50, so it's not an issue of financial concern on his part. Also, having a degree won't expand my employment opportunities at all at this stage, it's not a must-have in this industry. We're both well read, interested in the same topics, able to have adult conversations, ect. I spent 3 years attending college in person, so we have common experiences to share. So it's not that he finds me \"unrelatable\" on some level. \n\nYet, he is always putting me down for not having a degree. Also, he says that the degree Im working towards is worthless because online schools \"don't count\". He's mentioned on numerous occasions he doesn't want to date someone without a degree and that it's embarrassing for him.\n\nToday he brought it up again and I came very close to telling him to just not date me then. I'm still heavily considering just leaving. I don't feel like I should have to deal with someone putting me down, and I feel awful that he feels embarrassed to be with me. Do you think this is something we can talk out or should I just move on?", "summary": "Boyfriend puts me down for not having a degree and says it embarrasses him, should I leave or try to resolve it?"}
{"id": "t3_3hub7p", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by giving an ultimatum", "post": "I met this girl at the beginning of the year. We hit it off and started dating, and living with each other right away. Hit a bumpy spot and she left for about a month, but came back.\n\nIm in the military, and could be getting a job in September that would have me move. So, we discussed marriage. She eventually said she liked the idea, and on July 24th, 2015, we got married.\n\nWednesday morning at like 4am, she tells me that she doesnt want to be married to me anymore, ans that she only married me because she thought she was going to lose me.\n\nWe fought all wednesday, and thursday. This morning, I told her of we annul or get divorced, I would never see her again. She said she loves me, and wants to be with me, just not married. I told her again, if we got divorced, we couldnt ever be together. She left me ajd I lost my cool and said soke really stupid and hurtful crap. Now I am so pissed off, sad, and alone feeling.", "summary": "Gave someone an ultimatium that if they divorced me, we couldnt still date. She decided I didnt mean anything and wants the divorce and left."}
{"id": "t3_33bdki", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with girl I like [18F]; I'm going overseas; she tells me it's okay to get with other girls while I'm gone. I really sincerely like this girl and would love to be exclusive; but how do I express this to her without limiting her?", "post": "Hi r/relationships. Some context.\n\nI'd been dating this girl around November last year; it didn't work out initially and we went our separate ways. She contacts again about a month ago and asks if I want to hang out; we do. This time it works out so much better than before; we'd both matured a lot due to finishing school, I'd recovered from depression, and it was really utterly fantastic. I really like this girl, but seeing as the US is cemented; we kinda grudgingly agreed to keep it very low-key and casual seeing as I'm away for so long.\n\nFast forward past some pretty awesome casual dates to tonight; where after it all she confesses that she really does truly like me (as i do her) and that she'd like us to date properly when I get back, in spite of me going to the US. Now; my dilemma. This girl is perfect for me in every fashion. Banter is on point; she's stunning, great sexual chemistry, and we really like one another.\n\nI wasnt gonna go out of my way to bang my way across US and Europe anyway; but I feel as if seeing I'm away for so long; it'd be bound to happen at some point (and she doesn't want me to put it all on hold for her while im gone). However; I'm kinda fiercely loyal, and I don't want to hurt her; but want it to happen when I get back. I also know that if she was to move on to someone else, it'd break my stupid little heart, despite how reasonable it is from her perspective.\n\nWe're not going to cut eachother off (we plan to be in constant contact); but naturally the lack of intimacy is an issue and we're not really suited to Long Distance Relationships. Help me out?", "summary": "Going overseas, girl I like says its okay for me to get with other people while I'm gone, however I'd rather be with her. How do I express this wish for exclusivity without placing limits on her?"}
{"id": "t3_4adsa0", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Feeling unsupported", "post": "I'll try to keep this short. I have been trying to lose weight for 3 years now. The first year I lost 15lbs by running, counting calories and lifting weights in they gym with an irrational fear of becoming bulky. In about half a year I gained 7lbs back and was introduced to powerlifting. Although I have not gone back to my original weight I have still not reached my goal weight. \n\nI was discussing this with my boyfriend and he said that I should just stop thinking about it so much. If it hadn't happened by now it probably wouldn't and I should just try to be more happy in my skin. Now even though I understand that he meant well it left me feeling unsupported and alone. Now I want to try even harder then I have over the last months and prove him wrong but then I also feel that I'm doing it for the wrong reasons.", "summary": "Trying to lose weight for 3 years not much happened boyfriend tells me that I probably won't get to my goal weight and that I should just get more comfortable in my own skin."}
{"id": "t3_2jvdds", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[25m] How to know how intimate you two are atm (casual, close, dating, ...)", "post": "I've made some significant progress when it comes to social interaction (partially due to this subreddit - thanks!), but I think a lot of my mistakes right now are due to not knowing whether she likes me or not, if so how much she likes me. If she see's me as a friendly stranger, as a casual friend, as a close friend etc.\nThis is also relevant since for the first time I have a number of female friends and don't want to put them off by being clingy.\n\nSo I'm wondering if there are any tips/literature on how to assess this better.\n\n**[", "summary": "] How do I know if she see's me as a friendly stranger, casual friend, a close friend or a potential date?"}
{"id": "t3_wa68b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Feelings of drifting apart?", "post": "I've just moved in with my SO of one year.  I am very much in love and am very excited and happy to be living together.  But I've found myself now worried about falling out of love and drifting apart and ultimately losing him down the road.  Is this a normal reaction?  To be honest it has kind of taken me by surprise.  I'm not really sure what to think... I'm worried it may become a self-fulfilling prophecy.", "summary": "Is it normal and natural to fear drifting apart and falling out of love when moving in with a SO?  Does simply having these fears indicate failure at the outset?"}
{"id": "t3_3hw3cr", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting drunk on my first day of college", "post": "This happened last night. I just started college and last night me and a bunch of friends went out to one of the university hosted freshman dances. We all pregamed in the dorm a little bit and went out for the night. I unfortunately drank a bit too much and told my group (10-15 boys and girls) that I was going to go back to my room to sober up a bit but that they should all come back after the party was over to continue the night's shenanigans.\n\nI got back, I was drunk, forgot what I told them, and eventually opened up the hub and started jerking it. Of course, 30 minutes later, my entire floor came running into my room trying to party...and saw me ass naked spanking the monkey. The girls screamed and the guys laughed their asses off before leaving the room. So much for reinventing yourself in college...", "summary": "Got drunk, invited people over to my room to party, forgot I invited them, they walked in on me shaking hands with the milkman"}
{"id": "t3_wqwm8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit: Today I almost walked out on my job due to a mentally sound customer who threw his food on the floor because he didn't like it. Anyone have any good, \"Fuck this, I quit\" moments?", "post": "Granted, I know I didn't quit, but I seriously considered it. This \"gentleman\" who was with his toddler daughter and girlfriend/wife?, ordered Fish and Chips (asked if the fish had bone in them, what kind of fish it was, if it came with fries--told him no bones, cod, and that yes, our \"chips\" are fries), but he didn't like his meal after one nibble off one of the edges of the fish. So instead, he wants a quesadilla, but he doesn't want that because it had sour cream and guac on the plate....not even touching the quesadilla. Take it back, bring him a brand new plain one, without any sour cream or guac, bites into it and then throws it onto the floor. \n\nThroughout this whole ordeal, he almost never looked me in the eye, was extremely rude with his responses to such questions of,\"What would you like to drink?\" and \"How are you today?\". I ended up having my manager handle the rest of the situation and he finally left. Oh, he also wanted our lemonade, with light ice, but after he found out it was free refills, he asked for a new glass of it, with more ice, and kept sucking them down. I think I counted 6 refills in thirty minutes.", "summary": "Customer did not like any of the food brought to him, is extremely rude, and decides to throw his food on the floor to make his point. Almost threw the food back at him."}
{"id": "t3_1kuelt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 F] boyfriend [23 M] doesn't see that he's being an asshole. Am I wrong?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year now, and he doesn't like to sugar coat things. Ever. I admittedly can be really sensitive and hot headed but we usually manage to talk things out and find common ground. \n\nHowever - and I know this may seem like a really small thing, but it really hurt my feelings - yesterday as I was cooking us dinner he said something really hurtful. Let me give you some context:\n\nWe both **love** steak. I love to cook and I make a pretty bad ass steak, which he loves also. I wanted to try something new, something called a gizo which involves putting steak in a food processor/blender with a tomato sofrito. \n\nHe comes into the kitchen just after I sear the steak and sees me about to put it in my blender. **\"You're gonna put that in a blender? What a waste of steak.\"** \n\nI gave him a *wtf* face and told him what he said was uncalled for. \n\nHe thinks I'm overreacting. But it hurt my feelings. Am I wrong?", "summary": "Boyfriend sees me cooking something new, says what I'm making is a waste of steak. Is he being an asshole or am i just being a whiney baby?"}
{"id": "t3_1u1bmi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my ex [24 F] broke up over a year ago but I can't stop thinking about her resently", "post": "Last October (2012) I broke up with my girlfriend of just over a year.  I don't know if it is just because it is the holidays and I'm seeing my cousins and their SO together, or that my friends have been getting engage, or because the girl I planned on talking to and trying to and maybe start something with at a wedding this past weekend has no interest in me or if it's just because I'm lonely but I've thinking about her more and more lately. We broke up because we fought occasionally like all couples do over small stupid stuff but mainly because my friends said I wasn't my normal self when she was around and they hated it. I thought there has to be a better person for me out there that has everything I want and I shouldn't have to settle for what I'm looking for in a wife. I'm basically just wondering what Reddit thinks. \n\nShould I just be patient and keep trying to date other people and see how it works out or talk to her and try to get back together with her and see if there is anything there? \n\nSorry for the run-ons and other horrible grammar/spelling", "summary": "Broke up with gf over a year ago. Can't stop think about her lately. Looking for advice on what to do"}
{"id": "t3_4h084d", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by touching a wall", "post": "Didn't happen today, but a 3-4 years ago.\nI was visiting my Mom's brother and his family in India (I was about 12 years old or so). I lived in another country (not India). Anyways, I stayed with them for about 2 weeks by myself (parents were coming to another city in India later), so I pretty much spent time with my cousins, uncle, aunt and grandma. \nOne day, my uncle decided to take me down to the beach to show me what it was like. So my uncle, cousin and I set out. We left home and walked to the car (it was parked further up a street). It was like 2 pm and there was a lot of traffic on the street. There were 2 trucks blocking our path ahead to the car, which was just in front of these trucks, and there were only 2 ways to get past these trucks - go in between them, or squeeze in between a wall and the truck. My cousin and uncle go between the trucks, but the overly safety-conscious me decides to squeeze in between the wall and the truck. Bad idea. I get through no problem, but I notice something as I reach out to open the car door - there were hundreds of black ants on my left arm. I kid you not, HUNDREDS. My arm was literally black, from wrist to shoulder, and was barely able to see any of my skin. And these weren't just any black ants, they were carpenter ants. I must've brushed past an ant colony, and given them a new home. I frantically started brushing them off, at which point they started biting. I flinched in pain as they kept on biting me. My uncle and cousin, noticing my discomfort, rushed to my aid, and upon seeing my situation, started laughing hysterically before helping me out (they were still laughing then). There were still a few ants on me after we brushed them all off, having spread out to some uncomfortable places. We still went to the beach though, where I rinsed myself thoroughly before taking a shower back home.", "summary": "Tried being safety-conscious, which didn't work as I planned, ended up as a human colony for hundreds of black biting ants."}
{"id": "t3_2v5i6a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(23) everything in my 1-year relationship with gf (21) going good, however, I feel like I'm missing out by being in a monogamous relationship...", "post": "We have a good connection and deeply love each other. This being said, I can't help but feel that I'm passing up on a lot of beautiful women. I was never a handsome, nor charismatic guy in my (relatively) younger dating years and thus, I never really got that much attention from the opposite sex. I guess I've really blossomed and have been having to decline a lot of sexual advances lately. I'm not even out there looking for it: I don't flirt with these other girls (though of course, I engage in polite conversation if prompted) and I'm very conscious about not displaying certain types of body language. I never conceal the fact that I have a GF and often introduce this fact earlier on. My GF and I don't have any problems, especially where sex is concerned, though admittedly, it has become a tad stale. This doesn't mean that I'm itching for more/new sex, it just means that I don't look forward to the sexy times as much as I used to.\nAll this being said, I just can't help feeling like I'm missing out. Polyamory for sure is not an option for discussion with her and I know it would hurt her very much if I tried to initiate that discussion. I've never cheated in my life and never will, but this has been troubling me.", "summary": "In a good, monogamous relationship, though and influx of attention from the opposite sex has me feeling like I'm missing out."}
{"id": "t3_12z5g6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [20f] get over my insecurities I'm having over my boyfriends [19m] exes?", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend for 8 months but we've been friends for around 3years and I've been in love with him for most of that. Thing is I find myself thinking about his exes (or, well...One ex in general - his most recent one). They were together for 10 and a bit months and I'm forever wondering if he still thinks of her, if he misses her, whether he wishes I were her and just general crazy stuff like that. They don't talk anymore and as far as I know she broke up with him but he didn't want to talk about it so I don't know why. I can't ever seem to get him to have a proper conversation about her (not that I ask often, I don't wanna reopen any old wounds he may have.) \n\nLast night it finally got the best of me and I admitted to him that I wonder these things. His reply was \"Well, you know all the answers to those,\" and he smiled at me and that was the end of that conversation.\n\nMy question is, how do I get over this without having to keep talking to him about it? Any advice is appreciated guys! (:", "summary": "I have insecurities about my boyfriends ex because he was super in love with her and she broke it off with him. How do I get over it?"}
{"id": "t3_4vipe1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The dad of a sexting buddy (21F) of mine (26M) responded to me", "post": "This isn't too long or complex, just curious is all. There's a girl I've known for a few years through an event we do. She's cute, shorty, has always had a thing for me. We flirt on snapchat and send sexy texts and pictures. Typical shit, we live several hours away from one another, are both busy working and she's told me flat out she doesn't want a serious thing.\n\nWell this morning instead of her replying to me, her dad did :D! Said I was a \"coward,\" that I \"didn't love her,\" that I wasn't man enough to take her to lunch (???), all I wanted was sex (all true accusations, I assure you all). \n\nIn any other situation I'd kind of just laugh and move on. There's not much negotiating to do here. But I know her family well enough, we've all worked together, I enjoy them in the brief spurts I've associated with them, and it would make going to this event in the future slightly strained, but not otherwise uncomfortable. \n\nIt's strange to me that he's looking through his 21 year old daughter's phone, but I digress because who knows how protective I'd feel of my daughter? It's not my place to say if he was out of line, because it really doesn't matter. I'm not really offended this happened. In fact, I'm literally just now remembering she mentioned something like this happened before!\n\nAnyway, I guess I'm wondering how, or if, I should  respond to all of this. Do I apologize? I'm not particularly remorseful, but I guess I'm sorry he saw something he didn't like. I feel like no matter how I answer paints her in a light he'd find unflattering, which is more unfair to her.", "summary": "21 year old girl's dad responds to she and I sexting and calls me a coward for not being in love with her. OP is at a loss for words."}
{"id": "t3_2p2zrs", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not being able to right type of Chinese", "post": "Well this happened 3 years ago during my first year of University. \n\nI was just finishing my classes for the day and was approaching the main entrance, ready to go home. A chinese girl ran up to me really frantically and she was almost on the verge of tears. She kept pointing as this timetable vigorously and asking me the same question over and over in Mandarin. Now I am chinese yes, but I was born and raised in the UK and I only spoke Cantonese which is what they speak in Hong Kong. Mandarin is a whole new language to me.\n\nNow I replied to her in english, explaining that I have no idea what she needs. At which point she she starts to cry even harder and louder and wraps her arms around her head... I was thinking wtf... Not only was I extremely uncomfortable due to the crying asian stood infront of me, but now all the people walking past think i'm breaking up with the girl who is now whaling like an injured dog and wrapped her own arms around her head like she's being attacked by anacondas. People started to stand there and watch whilst I swiftly made an abbrupt exit.", "summary": "I abandoned a chinese girl who thought I could help because I was chinese too, but I didn't understand her and left her crying in the middle of the Uni campus"}
{"id": "t3_snlwt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO is an amazing man and absolutely perfect for me... In theory. So why aren't I happy with the man of every girl's dreams?", "post": "(A bit of background: I'm 31, he's 32 and we've known each other for just over 2 years, been together a year. We live about 30 miles apart so usually spend time together on weekends because of opposite work schedules. For now. There are plans for my son and I to move there in the near future.)\n\nHe's gainfully employed, owns his own home, doesn't have any real emotional baggage. He's attractive and a genuinely good person. No complaints on the sexy-times front. Yeah, he has quirks such as being a D&D-level nerd, but I knew all about that stuff before we dated. His shameless nerding is actually one of the things I love about him. He adores my 11 year old son and my son adores him.  He's not rich by any means, but spoils me by cooking Sunday breakfast for us when I've had a hard week at work. He remembers things I like and then surprises me with something small related to that (e.g. I'm a huge Cubs fan, he surprised me with a Cubs keychain when my old one broke).\n\nI was married to my son's father (now divorced, obviously) and not sure I ever want to marry again. He's never been married and is absolutely fine with not getting married if I don't want to. He has his own friends, he's not clingy or jealous. He's considerate and affectionate. \n\nThis is what a long-term, adult relationship is supposed to be. Why do I not want this? I WANT to want this. I just...don't. Is it possible that I will eventually if I stick it out for a while longer?", "summary": "My boyfriend is prince charming and I'm just \"meh\" on the whole thing. Wtf is wrong with me?"}
{"id": "t3_2x5wvw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [16F] Sister [18F] Hit my Boyfriend [16M]", "post": "Yesterday I had the worst experience ever, my boyfriend was at my house and I was making something to eat and I heard my older sister from the other room yelling at my boyfriend, I came out there to see what was happening and I saw her punch him in the frigging face. I pushed her away from him, slapped her, and started swearing at her and she tried saying that he stole her money off the table, when it was MY money that our parents had left out for me and I'm the one who took it. She insisted it was hers (it isn't), and she refused to apologize to my boyfriend. A couple hours after my boyfriend left she comes to my room and says oh maybe it was yours, but still you're a bitch for slapping me. \n\nI was so mad I was like wtf you hit my boyfriend and falsely accused him of stealing. She is being a bitch to me now and I don't know how to work this out. What are your opinions on this? And she still refused to apologize to him..", "summary": "My sister wrongfully accused my boyfriend of stealing from her, yelled at him, and punched him in the face. And now she's pissed off at me for slapping her because of what she did"}
{"id": "t3_144jg3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What movie has haunted you for years after watching it?", "post": "So when I was 6 (11 years ago) I was staying with my Grandma because my parents had left town for a business trip and we decided to watch a movie. So her and my sister left to go find one. They came back after renting a movie and put it in. Now as a kid I was a huge pussy, like scared of his own shadow kind of thing. Now if you had read the Goosbump stories as a little kid you will know they are actually fucked.. well my sister had gotten the movie \"The Werewolf of Fever Swamp\" and after about 25 minutes of watching the movie I was fucking terrified. My sister got to scared and went upstairs and it was only me sitting on the couch in a dark room shitting my pants. Now I would of gone upstairs but I was to scared to turn my head (yes I was a pussy) fearing that their was a Werewolf sitting right behind me getting ready to eat me as soon as I looked backwards. Now if you have seen the movie then you would know that their is a scene when the character is running from the Werewolf and the Werewolf falls into a pit of quicksand or something. Well I had recurring nightmares until I was 14 from that scene. I would wake up in a swamp and see a Werewolf running at me and I would start to run away, the Werewolf would easily catch me and then try to eat my face and as it went in for the bite I would wake up sweating and terrified. Eventually these went away after I watched the \"Haunting of Connecticut\" and yes I did go run into my parents room crying about fucking dead people.. oh god how young and innocent and such a huge pussy I was.", "summary": "I was a huge fucking pussy and fuck Werewolfs and dead people and most of all fuck you Grandma (Still love her) (Kinda)"}
{"id": "t3_3wf4wu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My sister[31/F] and I[M/29] don't want to have Christmas dinner with out parents[M-F/51] because they both want to bring their new toys[M/20]/[F/18]", "post": "So, parents have never had a great marriage, cheated on other, etc. They divorced finally 6 years ago. Since then they have been petty and mean to each other and have constantly tried to get my sister and I to choose sides. We've chosen each other. I wasn't close with my sister until I got out of college, but since then she is one of my best friends(Along with her husband) and she and her husband are a part of my social group.\n\nAnywho, both of our parents have new young toys(Not sure how, neither have money. They both look good and keep in shape but still) they have been with for half year or so, I don't really keep up with them, and for the last 2 years my sister has hosted Christmas Dinner for our family. They have been strained, but so far no blowouts.\n\nLast week we found out that our parents have been bickering over the phone and have both decided to bring their new partners into our family dinner to one up each other.\n\nI told my sister and she was furious. Neither of us want our kids to be around this stupidity, so we decided to dis-invite them. Since then we have been getting a lot of harassment from our parents and other family members.\n\nMy grandmother called me today and asked how I could be so heartless, that they are family, and family always trumps problems. She said my sister and I had no right to disinvite them and that our parents have every right to be with us and bring whoever they want.\n\nSo I have been dealing with this turmoil for a few hours now, wondering if we were in the wrong for doing this.\n\nDoes family really trump all, even for this situation?", "summary": "Sister and I don't want our parents to come to Christmas Dinner with their new partners just to one up each other. Family is upset at us. Are we in the wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_1fgao8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [17F] tell him [18M] about an extremely drunken peck that meant nothing?", "post": "Me (17F) and my boyfriend (18M) have been going out for about a year, and I really, really love him. We have as close to a perfect relationship as you can get. It's exam season and to celebrate my friends had a wild party last night, and due to losing several shot games I got incredibly drunk. We're talking can't stand up, room-swaying kind of drunk. \n\nMy friend and I were talking with one other guy and then suddenly she kissed me on the lips. I didn't really realise what she'd done until afterwards. Then later she did it again and I didn't stop it even though I knew what she was going to do. I am completely straight and have no attraction for her, but it was just a stupid drunk moment where I didn't think. I know my boyfriend would consider it just as severe as if I had kissed a boy and react accordingly. She has a boyfriend too but he is okay with it. What do I do? Do I tell him and possibly lose a fantastic relationship? I feel like the most horrible person alive right now and I know I'd deserve it if that was how it ended up.", "summary": "I drunkenly pecked another girl. Do I tell my boyfriend and risk break-up or pretend it never happened?"}
{"id": "t3_472xw4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Relationship with flatmate?", "post": "I'm (19M) at uni, and I've been really close with two of my flatmates (both F) as friends but recently I've been thinking about one of them in a more than relationship kind of way. So when we went out drinking one night, the other friend told me to go for it because apparently she likes me too, so I went for it was amazing but the next day we've just gone straight back to how we were, and she was talking about other guys etc in front of me.\n\n I'm very confused after everything that happened and would like some advice please. I'm not sure whether to really go for it if she's not that interested cause we live together, plus i don't want to make it awkward. Thanks!", "summary": "got with flatmate, both apparently like each other, next day its just gone back to normal, not sure how to proceed"}
{"id": "t3_47u6ya", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21/M] and my girlfriend [24/F] parted ways 2 months ago. Now I need help deciding if I want to give it another shot or not.", "post": "I had a relationship with this girl for like 8 months. Last part of our relationship was long distance. We had great and not so great moments togheter. This was my first relationship and I never felt this way for anyone else, we were really in love. \n\nBut our last weeks togheter were different. She started to be cold towards me. She started to say things like \"we should just be friends\". But after all the things we shared I couldnt be just her friend, and I knew she loved me (at least until that point). So I continued to act normally and one day she got upset when I told her I loved her and after a fight she said we shouldnt talk anymore. \n\nWhen eveything was fine she was the most loving and caring girl ever. But she used to bad those bad days when she got upset and was colder.  She had various unhealthy relationships and bad experiences like past boyfriends cheating on her and things like that. Also she went through some bad stuff lately.\n\nI alredy got asked by my friends if maybe she had a relationship with someone else but Im 100% percent she doenst (She isnt very social she's always had a small group of friends and never was with a guy if he wasnt her boyfriend).\n\nSo we got back in touch and I know that I still love her, I missed her a lot in these 2 months. But even though it would be amazing if we got togheter again and have amazing times like before I dont want to be hurted again. I dont blame her nor Im mad at her but she made me feel bad. \n\nHow should I approach this situation ?. I love her but I dont know if I can/should give her all of me again.", "summary": "Got back in touch with my ex. I still feel something for her but I dont know how should I approach this situation."}
{"id": "t3_1u08oj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think my friend [29M] is reliant on me [23F] for his happiness, and I'm feeling trapped by it.", "post": "My friend moved across the country 5 months ago for work, leaving his other friends and family, and I'm the only person he knows here. We met on a forum online and have been friends for about 3 years. He's a very sensitive person and very shy, which means he hasn't made new friends here and gets offended when I say I'd rather hang out with other people over him. He is my best friend, but I'm starting to feel suffocated. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells around him and constantly make excuses and explain myself. I don't like making plans because I'd rather just do a thing when I feel like it, but he needs things to be very planned and gets upset if something falls through or doesn't turn out the way he expected. I end up apologizing for things I don't believe warrant an apology, and just give in because I don't like to argue. I really like the guy, but I'm starting to wish he'd move away again so I could stop feeling so responsible for his happiness. Because it's stressing me out very much. Besides friend breaking up with him, what can I do?", "summary": "Friend relies on me for happiness because he has nobody else. I don't like letting him down but I can't do all the things he wants me to do and I feel suffocated."}
{"id": "t3_2w0mmy", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Ringing / pressure in one ear.", "post": "This is my first post and I'm glad this sub exists!\n\nAbout six days ago I went for a really hefty workout (martial arts) for about 1.5 hours. After that I felt pretty good, and the next morning I was really sore (pretty usual stuff).\n\nAnyway, now I have an uncomfortable pressure in my right ear with a non-stop ringing (I already have tinnitus, but this ringing puts that to shame).\n\nAnyone know what is causing this? Is it possible I have some kind of head cold or something? Seeing a doctor isn't a problem, I just want to know for sure it's what I should do before taking time off work. It's not terribly uncomfortable but it's not getting better...\n\nThanks guys.", "summary": "have a weird pressure/ringing in my ear after working out Tuesday, only just started the day after. Tips/suggestions on what it could be?"}
{"id": "t3_2s5ebg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17m] dont really know what to do with my crush [17F]", "post": "Sorry this is long, i couldn't express the situation properly any other way\n\nSo. First of all i've known this girl for three years know and i really like her. It has progressed beyond the boundaries of physical attraction to something i can't explain. I've tried to ask this girl out on multiple occasions but cannot bring myself to do it because of my rejection fears.\n------------------------------------------\nAnother problem is that i don't know how she feels towards me somedays she will actively talk to me. Other days she will completely ignore me. She also talks to me differently than other guys. With my friend she is quite loud and boisterous, but when talking to m she seems reserved almost fearful.\n------------------------------------------\nAn example of her \"mood swings\" is a couple of weeks ago. One of her friends got into some really messed up situation. she was \"potentially\" raped. Her, (my crush) was standing outside the counselor's office with another of her friends, who is in my class, crying their eyes out. Naturally i go up and ask whats wrong. Immediately after learning about this whole situation i gave some advice. Her friend smile and thanks me, yet she hugs me. Bear in mind this is the first time she has directly displayed affection.\n----------------------------------------------------\nThe next day i was passing by on my way to class, and saw her sitting in her class, by looking at her red eyes i could tell that she had been crying. I quickly scribbled a note on a piece of paper, telling her that i she needed somebody to talk to, i would be there. She hasn't spoken a word to me since.", "summary": "What do i do. Do i give up and move on, or do i stick through this. Any advice on judging her feelings. All and any advice would be greatly appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_2hxhy9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "College freshman here, with a general question on staying friends with those who didn't go for being more than friends\u2026", "post": "I am a college freshman at a school with a very high female population. In the past six weeks I have met two amazing girls (not at the same time) that anyone would be lucky to have, but there was that awful friend zoning that happen\u2026 It was shitty but I'm basically over both.\n\nAfter talking with a friend, she mentioned that I shouldn't be friends with them if \"it hurts too much\". Now understand that I have fallen on a tough patch with girls in general over the last 4 months i.e. friend zone, after friend zone. Its truly the most depressing thing right now, but maybe this post will help.\n\nMy question:\nOne of the girls is my next door neighbor in the dorms, like 10 feet away. She is in my group of friends and is in the common area frequently. If I were to say that I wanted to not talk to her for a while, how would I go about doing that?\n\nThe second girl is the only other person in my Calculus class who is open for study seshes in the same time periods as I am. She and I also think very similarly when it comes to math, so we work really well together, and if we get really stuck, who ever is available to go to office hours can report back to the other person. If I were to say that I wanted to not talk to her for a while, how should I break things off?", "summary": "I get too attached to girls I really like, and I'm wondering how to stay away in a close nit, small college setting?"}
{"id": "t3_27l48x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Im [f25] having problems with my girlfriend [f27]of 10 months pertaining to her playing with my nipples.", "post": "I know the title sounds odd but I didnt know how else to word it.\n\nMy girlfriend grabs my boobs and pinches my nipples all the time no matter we are doing, I could be cooking, in the shower, in the car etc it usually doesn't annoy me but every now and then they get really sensitive or sore so I tell her and ask her to stop but she still does it anyway.\n\nBut, one thing that I sometimes have to say that has a 99% success rate is \"youre making me horny\" and she stops straight away. I think that's bullshit and it happened again last night and I actually got really really upset about it.\n\nShe knew something was up so I told her and I said \"its just really really weird that if I say my nipples are sore or sensitive you will still pinch them really hard and laugh about it but the moment I say im horny you stop.\" And she said \"oh great so now youre having an issue about sex\" and I said \"no im having an issue with the fact that telling you my nipples hurt doesnt stop you but saying im horny does, it makes me feel like shit how can you not see this from my point of view? If you say you are horny I jump your bones straight away, if I say im horny you stop its just shit\".\n\nSo she stormed out of the bedroom and came back in once she thought I went to sleep and now weve woken up shes giving me the silent treatment.\n\nShould I just let this relationship end? It really does make me feel like shit when it happens.", "summary": "girlfriend wont stop playing with my nipples when they are sore but will stop the instant I say im horny. Is this a major red flag?"}
{"id": "t3_kg2oa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is my internet being throttled?  What is this outside company I am forced to go through?", "post": "So in August I moved into a new apartment, mainly because the internet was included in the rent, and was advertised as HIGH SPEED, I also had some friends tell me the internet here was good.  The first week or so we were getting ~20mbps and it was amazing.  However, a weekish after moving in we had no internet, at least that is how it seemed.  After a while trying to connect to various sites it took us to the [website of this company](\n\nWe went to the front office and they said just make an account with them and we would get internet.  We did this, and when making an account you had to choose a speed package.  The only package available was 1.5mbps...Hardly high speed as they said.  What is weird is Windstream is our ISP, as they were when we first moved in, but now this company comes into the equation for no apparent reason and just slows the fuck out of our internet.\n\nYou cannot connect to the internet here without signing into this website first, and it makes the internet horribly slow.  When we ask people at the front desk about it they basically have no fucking clue what is going on.", "summary": "does anyone know what this [NTC company] is and what the real point of it is? Is there any way to bypass it to get the internet speeds we are paying for?"}
{"id": "t3_2537bo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [22F] stop getting overly anxious when my LDR boyfriend [22M] goes out drinking?", "post": "Hi all. My boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship at separate universities. Being in college, we both like to go out from time to time and drink. These anxious feelings started coming after I visited him once, but before that I had no issues with him going out. It was his birthday so I drove to visit him for the weekend and attend his birthday party that his roommates and friends had planned for him. When we got to the club, I left him to dance and hang out with his friends to get a quick drink at the bar with one of his roommate's girlfriend. Right when I turned around, I see a random girl that he or any of his friends did not know come up, grab him and start making out with him and grabbing his crotch. No hesitation or anything. He was very drunk but he was taken aback so he pushed her off and grabbed my hand immediately. I know that he would never cheat on me and he showed that by not reciprocating. But every time he says he's going to go out, I just think back on random girls throwing themselves at people like that. I get these knots in my stomach and I kind of just dwell on it while he's out. I hate the way I get when he tells me he's planning on going out so I know he probably doesn't like it either. It seems really silly when I type it out like this or talk about it but when the time comes for him to go out, it's like I forget about being rational. How do I just let this go?", "summary": "Random girl threw herself at my LDR boyfriend one night out and I can't get that image out of my head. How do I move on from this?"}
{"id": "t3_3z6kxb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my /Girlfriend/ [18 F] of 6 months, break up after being honest.", "post": "Hey r/relationships, \n\nHere to talk about this since it happened on New Years day. It didn't upset me as much as it confused me. \n\nWe dated in the summer before she went off to college (as I went to college in our hometown). We both agreed to keep in touch and to also look for other people and date others if we feel the need be. We kept flirting off and on through the semester. --- College is over and she comes back down saying how she's still in love with me and wants to have sex.\n\nI broke it down for her, and was honest. Stating that I've been intimate with a girl, and have started dating her like we initially said we should do. \n\nAlthough we both agreed on the gameplan, and I tried to not lead her on, she was extremely upset with me. Now I'm known as a manipulative bastard to all her friends, which is fine, since i never see them anyways.", "summary": "Girl gets upset when I do something we both agreed upon doing and gets butthurt over honesty. Feels good man."}
{"id": "t3_4egqil", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 F] have an unhealthy obsession with stalking my boyfriend's [26 M] ex on social media", "post": "We've been together for over 3 years, but for the first year and a half, he was addicted to alcohol and drugs, which turned him into a pathological liar. He physically cheated on me with 4 of his exes during his addiction and that may have been the root of all of this. Now, he is almost 2 years sober and has constantly apologized/made up for everything he has done to hurt me. I 100% trust that he would never cheat on me again and he has shown me that. Exes have reached out to him and he immediately blocks them and tells me that they contacted him. He has changed and our relationship is the most solid, trust-filled, secure thing on this planet, but I still think about his ex girlfriends. Every single day. I check both girls' instagrams every day, multiple times a day. If they block me, I create a new account and check from there. I can spend all day just scrolling through their old pictures and reading every comment. I check if they have new followers, if they were tagged in anything new, all of it. I know their accounts and their faces better than I know my own. I know their family members' names, places they've lived, concerts they've been to, their other exes, thing that my boyfriend doesn't even know. I'm not sure why I do this or what will ever come out of it. They don't think about me and my boyfriend anymore, so why am I so stuck on them?", "summary": "I'm obsessed with stalking my boyfriend's exes on social media, even though they're not a threat and I know that. What's wrong with me?"}
{"id": "t3_1wf9lg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [M19] wants to transfer to my University next year and move in with me [F20]. We have been together for almost 3 years now, but is it wrong for me to feel very uneasy about this?", "post": "My boyfriend and I got together at the end of our junior year of high school and we are now sophomores in college. We have both been each other's first everything- first relationship, first love, first sex partners, etc. I know that I love him, but at this point I am only 20 years old and don't think I know whether I am ready for this huge step!\n\nHe has expressed that he wants to marry me one day; I have expressed that I don't want to think about marriage until I'm at least 25. I'm a very motivated person and career-oriented and want to accomplish a lot of things before I settle down, get married, and have children. \n\nI don't want to break up with him. There is no one else in my life that I am interested in romantically and my boyfriend is literally the best boyfriend ever. He may lack in the romance department, but has greatly improved since I've talked to him about it. He's a great guy- he goes to UCF and I go to UF and so his transferring would generally be an improvement, I don't really feel bad about that. \n\nBut sometimes I question whether I want to be with him forever. Forever is a long time, and he's the only thing that I know and have experienced. I have other friends that are living with their SOs but they also are already contemplating engagement and marriage, while the idea of that scares me.\n\nWould it be okay to move in with him when I'm not as sure about him as other people are in their relationships? Or maybe do I just have a fear of commitment? My parents are divorced and I haven't witnessed a really strong long-term relationship before, so this is possible.\n\nHELP!", "summary": "I'm feeling uneasy about moving in with my boyfriend of three years. This may seem abnormal, but we're also only 20 years old. He seems very sure about us. What is wrong with me? What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2pg0xl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with guy [32M] I've been seeing for a month, was this too much sexting??", "post": "This is how our convo went... was it too much?? we've only been dating for a month. \n\n**Him**: I can't stop thinking about how amazing saturday was...\n\n**Me**: Me too. I want to do it again...\n\n**Him**: Me too! \nI can't stop thinking about you bending over in front of me. \n\n**Me**: Oh yeah? \n\n**Me**: I'll be thinking about sat night when I go to bed tonight\n\n**Him**: Oh yeah? which part?\n\n**Me**: When you came in my mouth and I was looking up at you\n\n**Him**: That's really hot. I think I will go do some thinking about sat night\n\n**Me**: Put those thoughts to good use :) \n\n**Me**: I know I will\n\nI'm afraid he will lose respect for me.", "summary": "Sexting with guy I've known for a month, afraid I said too much. Would he lose respect for me?"}
{"id": "t3_3m1acc", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "19/M Landed on big right toe while playing sport", "post": "First post ever so...\n\nSkip to last 2 paragraphs if you don't want to read so much\n\nSo I am a 19 year old male weighing in around 140 pounds with a height of 5' 10\", and recently I hurt my toe while playing soccer tennis (tennis with a soccer ball, lol); what happened was that I kicked the ball with a high kick and then landed a bit awkwardly and with most of my weight on my right big toe.\n\nAt first I could not bend my toe and it had begun to swell, next day it had swollen but no bruising, bruising appeared on the next day (mostly on the top had expected the bruising to be on the bottom of the toe), and on the 4th day bruising has disappeared but it was still swollen and basically unmovable/frozen. \n\nAfter visiting the doctor on the third day I was informed that it was very likely sprained and/or broken/fractured but have not taken an x-ray because of laziness. At the end of the fourth day I had begun getting very curious as to why I still could not bend my toe so I started bending it and twisting it with my hands, after twisting it hard enough clockwise I heard a loud pop and regained most movement of the toe, and am now curious if it was sprained/fractured to begin with.\n\nSo I guess my question is \"Why was my toe locked in position after landing on it awkwardly, and if I am able to move it freely with very slight pain is it sprained at all?\" Most things I search on google about \"locked Toes\" come back with Hallux Rigidus which I am pretty sure is more of an arthritis type of thing and isn't caused by injuries.\nI will probably get it x-rayed tommorow... probably", "summary": "Hurt Toe after landing awkwardly,was told it was sprained, got annoyed it was stuck in place/frozen decided to twist it and regained movement. Do I have a sprain if at all?"}
{"id": "t3_25cjmy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20M] cheated on my girlfriend[20F] of a year and got her back, but not sure how to deal with the insecurity.", "post": "In the summer of 2013, i cheated on my girlfriend. We had only been dating for 3 months, but it still hurt her like crazy, because we were so close.\n\nI cheated on her because I am an idiot, and because my \"White Buffalo\" text me telling me to come over while I was hanging out with 2 guys my girlfriend had previously slept with. \n\nNever mind, no excuses. I won her back in December 2014, and we have been dating since, and I have been beyond good; not going to the bar with my buddies, not texting or talking to other girls ETC. And this is fine with me.\n\nI keep telling my buddies; in the future I'll be able to come to the bar and hang out with you guys all the time, but right now, I need to make her trust me again. My friends are fine with this.\n\nBut she has so many guy friends; due to working at a bar, and she is kind of unreasonably close with them. Of course I can't be the jealous type, due to what I've done, but it still bothers me that I can't even converse with other girls, but she can basically flirt with guys, even though I've been amazing to her the entire time we've been back together.", "summary": "I cheated on my girfriend in the summer, she came back to me, and I've been amazing. But it bother me that she can flirt and talk with guys while I cant even converse with girls."}
{"id": "t3_2wupoo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[17f] My Boyfriend's [17m] Sister [19f] Hates Me for No Reason", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for 1 year and 3 months, I'm 17 years old and so his my boyfriend, his sister is 19. Our relationship has been great, aside from one problem. His older sister seems to absolutely hate me, and she has ever since I met her. We both go over to eachothers houses a lot and are familiar with eachothers family, and everyone in my family likes him, and everyone in his family likes me except for her.\n\nI have never been rude to her in any way at all, I try to be very nice to her and I even bought her a small Christmas gift. And she still hates me. When I first went over to there house I had dinner with the family, and she was pretty much eyeing me down the whole time. She's said several rude things to/about me throughout our relationship. Once when my boyfriend and I were having a fight on the phone, I heard her in the background refer to me as \"that stupid bitch\" and she posted a mean tweet about me, she didn't tag me or even mention my name but it was like a subliminal insult. And once she commented on an instagram picture of me and a guy (just friend) she put the 2 eyes emoji thing, i took it as like, she's watchin me? And I know for a fact that she has tried telling him to break up with me a couple times. And she is just so rude to me and I don't understand what I ever did wrong.\n\nI've told my boyfriend about how it upsets me that she doesn't like me and he said he's tried talking to her about it and she's stubborn and he doesn't know whats wrong with her. I feel like asking her why she doesn't like me but I don't want to set her off. Our relationship is perfect aside from this, I definitely want to stay together so please don't suggest breaking up. How can I deal with her and why do you think she hates me? I have complimented her and I'm always nice to her even though she isn't to me, and I treat her brother perfectly so I don't understand why she's like this.", "summary": "My boyfriend's older sister hates me for what seems to be no reason, we've been together for over a year now and she's not getting any better."}
{"id": "t3_2tjz5z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [18 M] and am trying to friendzone [18 F] we have been texting for 3 mounths but she wants to get real", "post": "So I added a girl at work on snapchat, then we exchanged numbers like you do. We started talking about work but that eventually went on to everyday things. She would talk about her boyfriend and I played on as If I actually gave a fuck. When he would not talk to her she would talk to me about her problems. This went on until she broke up with him.\n \nThe following is a conversation with her.\n\n\"good but it would be better if (Her ex) would acc talk to me instead of being with his ex. Your acc quite good looking *crying with laughter face x2*\"\n\n\"Thanks....... you to (smiling face x2)\"\n\nthen we talk about work and it seems that that just came out of the blue and she did not talk about for long. \n\nI not interested in her in the she seems to be with me. I don't want to be in a relationship with her but she is send signals as if she wants to be with me.\n\nThen she sent this.\n\n\"(My name) I need u to be my date for a night *monkey covering eyes*\"\n\n\"*smiley face* Why??? *smiley face* what's up??????\"\n\n\"I have to go on a double date u coming? *crying with laughter face and monkey covering eyes*\"\n\n\"With who??????? *smiley face x2*\n\n\"Me & (her friends name)\"\n\n\"oh who's (her friends name) date?????\"\n\n I don't know if I am leading her on, how can I tell her nicely to fuck of. Help me reddit.", "summary": "May have lead on a girl I have no intention of dating and now want to let her know I don't like her in any sort of way."}
{"id": "t3_2ybdr0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not locking my door", "post": "Hello redditers,\n\nI live in a very busy area in a university town in Canada (hence leaving the door unlocked). Today, while I was watching a movie with 2 of my roommates we heard the door open and someone go upstairs. We thought nothing of it at first as our roommate was out with a friend and it was around the time we thought she would be coming back. \n\nRight in the middle of of movie our other roommate and her boyfriend come downstairs and ask us to help them with the drunk girl. Not taking them very seriously, we continue to watch for a few more seconds until they yell, \"You have to help us, a random drunk girl just wandered into our bedroom and is now puking in the washroom!\" \n\nIt turns out the person who had come into our house wasn't our roommate, but a severely inebriated university student with no shoes or jacket. Turns out she had initailly wandered into the only room with a person in it, and proceeded to attempt to puke in her closet. Thankfully, my roommate managed to get her out of the room in time and locked her in our washroom, where she proceeded to take off her pants and puke all over our floor. Cue the panic. \n\nInitially thinking that it was an upstair neighbour who had just wandered house as a mistake we knock on their door asking if they had lost a person. No luck there. \n\nAfter a few minutes of panic and wondering wtf was happening, I decide to call the cops and paramedics. Thankfully, they come quickly and get her out of the house, leaving only a puked on the bath mat for us to remember her by.", "summary": "TIFU by not locking the door and letting a super drunk university girl come into our house and puke in the washroom."}
{"id": "t3_3esvpq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25 F] boyfriend [25 M] is becoming increasingly patronizing due to some medical issues (not as bad as it sounds)", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for 10 years. I have a mental illness, and medications have left me with some cognitive deficiencies. I am not as sharp as I was when we first started dating, and it's become increasingly hard for me to think and remember things over the last couple of years.\n\nWhen we are having a conversation, I will be paying attention to him as much as physically possible, but I have a hard time remembering small details. For example, today he was telling me about something his boss was saying to him at work. I could remember the overall message his boss had, but I could not remember the finer details. So I had to ask questions to verify some new information he was giving me. He unintentionally (but not apologizing either) became very patronizing and condescending. Lots of \"I already said this,\" and \"Yes. Like I said...\"\n\nHe knows I struggle, but I know he doesn't fully *understand*, and doesn't seem to remember all the time. I normally brush it off, but I realized I shouldn't be feeling belittled over this.\n\nAm I in the wrong and just being dramatic? Or is there a good way to communicate to him that I struggle and he needs to be patient?", "summary": "Mental health treatment left me struggling to remember finer details and communicate effectively. Boyfriend gets frustrated, but is having a hard time adjusting his expectations and instead becomes condescending."}
{"id": "t3_4c2rlh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[26F] little sister [21F] smells like she cuddles 20 skunks at all times.", "post": "I want to start off by saying my sister is an amazing personality and she's a fabulous woman, but there's a serious problem with her when it comes down to her body odor and body care. My little sister has ALWAYS fought people when they bring up her body odor, we've even brought her to a doctor once after we made her shower for a full week in a row to see if the smell will disappear - but it didn't, it actually got 10x worse. The doctor said the smell seemed more with her care of her body and surroundings than anything else, so that was that. After that, every time ANYONE brought up the hygiene issue, she would not make any excuses, she would actually do the total opposite - she becomes verbally abusive, result to names and then make it almost intolerable to talk to her.\n\nCut to two weeks ago, her friend had brought her home from school and I admit, her odor was fairly strong that day. My sister didn't see it, but her friend hosed her car with febreeze and rolled her windows down before pulling away. I didn't tell her, but I sure did bring her odor up again and was met with, again, verbally abusive language and behavior. \n\nAnother incident that happened is my sister went to use the bathroom on a following day while I had friends over. Her scent was SO OVERPOWERING that when my friend went in, he immediately came out and he had a visibly disturbed look on his face. He, having been my friend since elementary school, was honest with me and told me he smelled some really bad in our bathroom. I checked, it was indeed my sister's odor as it tends to linger. \n\nTHEN another incident where we went to the store, she was elsewhere in the establishment and I was in one aisle with another woman, who was 100% perfectly fine...until my sister showed up. She visibly looked uncomfortable and ended the conversation VERY quickly the second my sister arrived and stuck around for at least 15 seconds. I'm at my rope's end with this, I don't know what to do since she is reaching that age where she needs to get her act together for when she looks for work.", "summary": "Little sister constantly smells like hot cheetos and ass on a hotplate, how can I help her smell a little bit less offensive?"}
{"id": "t3_3qfvo7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (F/22) am antisocial - go back and forth between wishing I had friends, and not wanting to deal with the hassle/getting easily annoyed at people", "post": "I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else is like this or if I'm just weird? I'm pretty antisocial in general, don't have many friends, would rather relax at home then go out etc.\n\nsomedays I desperately wish I had a group of friends to do stuff with. Other days I don't want to deal with that. Like if I start talking to someone new and they want to talk every day or ask to hang out a lot I immediately get the feeling they're being clingy, don't want to do anything with them etc and kind of react the same way towards romantic relationships also? \n\nHow do I nicely let people know, no I don't want to hang out with you multiple times a week and talk every day, without coming off as a bitch?\n\nAs I said don't have many friends, also never been in \"a relationship\" and am a virgin (part my antisocialness, part haven't tried, part don't want someone hanging on me 24/7).. And I feel really shitty about it. Like I'm way falling behind other people my age in these departments. \n\nI've tried to push myself to \"get over it\" and just deal/be around people more but ugh. Some days I wish I had someone I was close to and other days it's a relief I don't. I don't think I'm asexual, I have sexual *feelings* but not toward anyone in particular. People just annoy me.\n\nIs there something wrong with me for feeling this way? How do I fix it? It's not that I'm afraid of getting close to people. I do that pretty easily actually.  I know this probably comes off as like I am a really SNOBBY person but I'm not. I get along with most people and am friendly.", "summary": "am I crazy for being so antisocial and not wanting to deal with the hassle of relationships? I wish I felt differently and feel I'm missing out on a lot in life"}
{"id": "t3_4bjuz8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Recently surfaced trigger is about to ruin my [39 F] relationship with guy [42 M] I am dating", "post": "I was in a bad relationship with my ex for 9 years.  I have been single for the past 4.  \n\nI have recently started dating again and realize I have a trigger and I want to overcome it.\n\nMy ex was a serial cheater and it was often with women from work.  Eventually I knew that anytime he was talking about \"my friend from work\" he really meant whatever girl at work he was fucking.  \n\nSo fast forward to dating and met a great guy.  Except when he talks about his female co-workers.  It sets off a stupid trigger in my brain that must be sleeping with them.  I hate it and it really is bothering me.  How can I make it go away?", "summary": "Thanks to my ex, everytime the guy I am dating says he did something with \"a friend\" from work, a trigger goes off that he must be sleeping with them."}
{"id": "t3_hje49", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Reminder: if you encounter great customer service, especially over the phone, be sure to pass the compliment onto the supervisor", "post": "I just had my first experience calling up Virgin Mobile's customer service, and I hadn't heard good things; their horrid customer service reputation nearly kept me from signing up with them.  So I was pleasantly surprised when the representative who talked to me was incredibly patient, helpful, and had a sense of humor; I didn't have my account numbers ready, I didn't know where to find certain things in my bill, etc., but she was patient and didn't grumble.  At the end, when I thanked her for her great help and asked to speak to her supervisor, I could hear a smile break out on her face.  Her supervisor did say that she would be rewarded for my compliment.", "summary": "I probably made someone's day (and maybe got her a promotion) just be pointing out to her supervisor that she did an excellent job, and you should do the same in the future."}
{"id": "t3_i4nch", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Going to the courthouse and we're gonna get married?", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\n     My girlfriend and I are in love with each other.  We have been together for a year and 4 months.  We both want to get married, but are in college and don't have the money for a service.  We wanted to move in together this year to help save expenses for food, rent, etc. and make our housing situations easier.  I'm currently out of a place, and trying to find a place to live.  While she is looking for a roommate.  However, her parents are very conservative and don't think it's appropriate for a \"young Christian girl\" to live with a boy.  (I'm an atheist, and they don't approve.)  \n     The thought of marriage is something we have talked about and feel very comfortable with.  We really to care about each other.  I want to get married for financial reasons.  I also don't want to ruin the grand idea of a wonderful wedding for her by making her legally married to me first.\n     This is where my potential plan comes in to play.  I was thinking that we could go down to the courthouse and get legally married.  We would tell her parents and mine.  They could even be there.  We wouldn't change her name until we had a nice ceremony.  We could tell our friends that we are engaged.  Finally we could have the wedding that she's always wanted and change her name.  We could even change her name and then have a renewing of the vows sort of deal.\n     I am curious as to what everyone thinks about this plan, especially girls (I know most of you like the idea of weddings.)  I think I might tell her tonight.", "summary": "I wanna get married for financial reasons and don't wanna ruin my girlfriends dream of a wedding.  What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_zmtk7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, My military contract ends in 145 days and I am seriously considering getting out despite not having a clear plan. Have any of you taken huge career risks? How did it turn out?", "post": "I like the military for the fact that I get paid pretty decent money for the amount of work I do. I also get medical, dental, life insurance, free (though not very reliable) flights to almost anywhere and am able to retire after 20 years. The thing is though, is that I want something different. I get bored with things pretty quick and I am starting to get pretty bored with my career. Also, 20 years in the military can really take it out on a person and once I'm done, then what? I suppose I could get a job doing that working for the military as a civilian doing pretty much the same thing. I would like to go into business for myself, and I figure if I am going to make a move, I should make it now before I have too much time invested into the military.", "summary": "I'm tired of the military and want get out to do something else but I don't know what yet. Have you taken a leap of faith career-wise? How did it work out?"}
{"id": "t3_i4b86", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why do people who support human space travel in spite of the obvious, monumental technical and environmental hurdles?", "post": "When I hear people argue in support of manned space travel, I usually hear the theme that man's destiny lies with space. I don't really see how that's true in our lifetimes with current technology. \n\n* Mars is a [toxic dump] Perchlorate is some [nasty stuff] even at low levels. \n* [Radiation] in space. People who support space travel always ignore the fact for some reason. Think about it, even a short trip to Mars could expose an astronaut to enough radiation to kill them. Not to mention all the radiation on Mars, which don't have an atmosphere or Van Allen belt comparable to Earth.\n* Space makes no economic sense. Currently mining in one of the most [war torn countries] on Earth in several orders of magnitude more easier and economic than sending a rocket out to some asteroid. The only exception to this might be helium-3, which even if we actually had the technology to use would be easier to mine roboticly. \n* Space is generally a cold barren shithole. There's not much to do on the moon, Mars is to toxic and exposed to radiation, so that leaves to asteroids and moons of Jupiter and Saturn. But really, what's even the point? We literally know of nothing there that would justify a single manned trip.", "summary": "It seems obvious that human space travel is useless at this stage on our technical development, yet some people support it. Why?"}
{"id": "t3_3juyom", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[Help] Strange nibbling/biting behavior with other dog...", "post": "My boyfriend's parents live about an hour and a half away. We visit them regularly (used to be every other weekend pre-dog). Since adopting Cocoa, we have visited them 3 times (we have had her two months). She comes along. She is great in the car!\n\nThey have a dog, a 3 year old collie/border collie cross. She's a bit neurotic and under socialized. And morbidly obese. She's nice enough I guess, and they're trying to bring down her weight, but they only recently started walking her regularly. I suspect she's pretty under exercised but she's also a pretty lazy dog (maybe because of her weight..) \n\nSo the weird bit. When Cocoa is allowed to approach Roxy after they greet/play and Roxy is panting, she immediately goes for Roxy's tongue and mouth and tries licking/nibbling. She does this so much that Roxy gets agitated and the bickering starts. \n\nNote that we have been pretty slow on the introductions in that we keep them separated most of the visit, let them romp outside to tucker them out off leash (they play hard, but lots of bows and positive body language, so they seem to get along), and have walked them together. They have gotten more used to each other with every visit. They just can't seem to settle when off leash around each other. They have to be physically separated or Roxy will approach Cocoa and Cocoa will keep trying to lick her. I am concerned the nibbling and subsequent romping will lead to aggression; it hasn't so far, but we separate them until they settle again. \n\nI just can't understand why Cocoa wants to lick/nibble Roxy's tongue. She doesn't do this to dogs at the dog park. She's pretty independent and happy to leave other dogs alone. Except Roxy. She kind of fixates and the two just can't rest without us physically intervening.\n\nWhat causes this behavior and is it something I should be worried about or can do something to alleviate?", "summary": "my dog wants to lick/nibble at another (obese) dog's mouth and tongue. Only this dog. She gets so fixated we have to separate them or other dog gets annoyed. Why?"}
{"id": "t3_1hwgw7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[28M] lost my gf[34/F] of 18 months due to something I think I am slowly realizing about myself being raised by an Aspergers father. I'd love some input.", "post": "My gf finally gave up on me about a month ago. I've been talking to my parents about this and would like some more perpective.\n\nI was raised by a father with aspergers. He was raised by an ASD mother and bipolar father. Needless to say he didn't have the best examples to learn from considering observation is his main method of learning emotional/loving interaction. My mother tried to compensate for it as best she could, but I think that lead to an overbearing type of love that really has affected me as well. \n\nAnyway. I lived in a VERY religious household until 20. Once I was out I latched onto a woman I met and we got married at quickly. About 5 years later she divorced me. I met another woman and latched on again. Once again she left me. \n\nSo. My recent realization as to what is ruining my relationships (and actual question) is that I have A LOT OF trouble realizing that someone loves and cares about me. I had the two extremes with my parents and reject love in all forms now. I don't trust/believe people that say they admire me or see anything good in me. \n\nQuestion part: What can I do to deal with this? Anyone else in a similar situation? I feel that I don't know how to feel loved or tell that someone really loves me. It's ruining relationships with friends, family, gfs, coworkers, etc. I seem to follow that same pattern over and over and I'm tired of it.\n\nI've also dealt with depression/anxiety for years, but I don't believe those are the roots of my current issues. I think this is a deeper root that I would like to explore and welcome any and all input.", "summary": "The love of my life finally got tired of my shit. It's becoming a pattern in my life. I think it has something to do with how I deal with \"love.\" Help?"}
{"id": "t3_kdu4y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "College age and beyond Redditors:  How many of you went from complete introvert to social butterfly in your high school and college years?  How did you do it?", "post": "I'm asking this because I was just reflecting on how a similar transformation happened to me.  This weekend I am going to visit some friends at my old college, and I am legitimately having trouble deciding Who I am actually going to stay with and how I am going to see all of these people.  I then began to think about how freshman year I was so cripplingly shy that people in my building swore they hadn't heard me talk or even seen me ever all year.  For me this transformation came about by being sick of not being able to make my own friends, always relying on other people to introduce me or bring them around.\n\nI literally sat there reading and studying social behavior and the various theories and techniques out there.  Sure, at first it started like some completely inhuman social experiment, but I slowly began to be able to really form strong connections and actually care about other people in my life.  Empathy was a foreign concept for me (for deeper issues I don't really care to discuss) so i literally had to learn how to be empathetic.  Fast forward to today and I couldn't imagine life without my family and friends as they have become such a big part of who I am now.  So reddit, what's the story behind your transformation.", "summary": "Used to be really anti-social. Used all that alone time to study how to be social. After a year and change of practice, can't imagine being who I was before."}
{"id": "t3_ijrd0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How to let a girl down easily?", "post": "Turning down a girl who's asked me out twice:\n\nThe way I see it, my options are:\n* Turn down / stall her invitation, to see if she can get the message herself. Hope I don't run into her sometime soon.\n* Let her know I'm not interested, but still would be up for meeting if she wants to be just friends.\n* Agree to meet, try to convey my lack of interest and hope she gets it\n* Agree to meet, tell her straight up what I feel if it looks she is trying to push it.\n\nI'm leaning towards option 2, but am not sure.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Girl who travels in the same social circle, asked me out once in person, tried to stall her out, she messaged me again. Want to turn her down gently, but without being an ass"}
{"id": "t3_e18o9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Divorce or Reconcile...", "post": "My husband left October 30th and now resides in a studio motel. I've learned that marriage wasn't what I thought it would be, but have now come to a place of understanding and readiness. He on the other hand has not. \n\nHe is in the middle of the road. He says, \"I don't know what I want.\" He said he'd like to try dating (as we never did to begin with) and see if we belong together.\n\nI believe if you're going to give it a shot you have to at least come home first. I think the longer he's gone the farther apart we'll drift. So, what's the point if only to cushion his fall in the end?\n\nI want to stand firm (for me, for once, not him) and just let him know. If he wants to try we can together. Otherwise he can date someone he has not already married. I am ready to move forward alone or with him, but refuse to stagnate and let this break me further.\n\nShould I give him time or not? I ask this question fairly certain of what the answer to this will be, but I ask anyway. Maybe someone can give me real hope or get me out of my god-awful denial. I feel like he'll come back. I think I might be fooling myself.", "summary": "My husband wants to date me while living on his own. I figure if he isn't willing to work on it at home it's pointless."}
{"id": "t3_1r5pg4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [20F] help my friend [M24] get over his breakup?", "post": "I've been friends with this guy, let's call him L. for a few months, mostly online since we live in different cities. He has anxiety issues, and takes medication for it, including anti-depressives.\n\nHe was, at the time, together with K., and they seemed happy together. \n\nRecently (two weeks ago) she broke up with him because she couldn't stand his problems anymore (and I also think she was a bitch to him during the relationship, belittling him, flirting with other guys in front of him, not admitting they were together in front of people & other similar issues). \n\nHe got off anti-depressants, and he was expecting her to be with him in that time of need, but for some reason she broke it off with him. I've not asked for many details because I don't want to enable him to throw himself self-pity parties, unless he shows signs he does want to tell me in detail what happened.\n\nHe's been incredibly depressed since, threw himself into a drunken stupor (he drinks daily, multiple times a day), hasn't taken a bath in a week, goes from blaming himself to blaming her, from hating her to loving her, from wanting to get back together with her to trash talking her.\n\nNow, he can talk all he wants about her with me, but how can I stop him from drinking? He drinks and drives too, which is dangerous.\n\nI'm way over my head, and I don't know how to help because I can't understand. This is so far from how I deal with breakups that I don't know where to start helping or how.", "summary": "Friend's girl breaks up with him, he's off antidepressants, horribly depressed because of the breakup, drinks excessively. How can I help him?"}
{"id": "t3_12wgy8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What should I do?", "post": "I'm 22 my boyfriend is 20, we've been together for ten months. We've known each other for years. I'm in love with him, he doesn't love me back, which I told him was fine, I'm loving without expectation. I told him I want him to fall in love with me on his own time when he feels like it's right. I've been patient, I've been \"in love\" with him for a few months now. I'm not quite sure if I should just calm my shit down and wait more, but I have grown anxious. He doesn't have to full blown, head over heels in love with me, I just want to know if the fact has crossed his mind yet. I want to know if he's considered falling in love with me. He says he wants to focus on school and not want to be distracted by thinking about, I personally don't see how it would change anything we'd be the same couple with stronger feelings... but I think it's his defense mechanism. It's not like I'm asking for a ring on my finger, I still have my entire life ahead of me, I also want to finish school before anything too serious. We're pretty much past the \"having fun\" mark, I mean i honestly didn't even think we'd last this long, falling in love just kind of happened.\n\nWe're good together, I just don't want to be the only trying in the relationship, basically I'm asking how I should go about asking him if he's even thought about the chance of love yet? But in a way that won't freak him out because it's not that big of a deal, i'm just growing anxious. Or should I chill for a bit and see how things play out? And i feel awkward posting this....not going to lie.", "summary": "I don't know where we are at in this relationship, but I don't want to freak him out by asking."}
{"id": "t3_fwjw9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Girlfriend and I are having some issues (crosspost from /r/AskWomen).", "post": "Alright so here's the deal. I am twenty years old and she is nineteen. She's currently attending the university that I live five minutes away from and plan to transfer to in the fall.\n\nNow she is my sixth sexual partner. I know that's not an astounding number but it's not incredibly low either. It's enough that I have never questioned whether I was at least decent in bed. Most girls I slept with experienced multiple orgasms during the act. I always considered cunnilingus a pretty solid way of getting at least one for her so that I don't finish feeling entirely selfish.\n\nNow my girlfriend is not a virgin but her sexual history is very reserved. She's only had one other partner and from what I can tell it only happened a few times and was never an enjoyable experience for her.\n\nIt has been much harder for her to orgasm than any other girl I have been with. She has still never experienced a vaginal orgasm in her life.\n\nThe first time we had sex was painful for her, especially during the initial entry. She was definitely wet and we also used lubrication, but it just did not want to fit fantastically. She's told me that the more recent times we've had sex (only been sexually active for a couple weeks now) it has only been painful during entry, once it's in she claims there's no problem. Part of me thinks she may be trying to play down the pain though for my benefit (she truly is a sweetheart like that). Part of me thinks the pain may be getting in the way of her enjoyment.\n\nIs there anything I can do to make the experience more enjoyable for her? It kills me that she's not having regular orgasms when we have sex.", "summary": "Never had a problem with sexual performance until recent girlfriend who is not having regular orgasms. She experiences pain during the act. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2mhkj3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by joking that I was gay.", "post": "To preface this, I'm 23 and haven't had a girlfriend.  I've been on a few dates here and there, but just haven't connected with anyone yet.\n\nSo today we went to a large sports bar and grill to eat and watch the Denver game, and I'm with a good friend, his family, and my entire family.  I'm trying to tell my mother about my job, and she just can't understand me.  I try speaking slower so she can read my lips, but that isn't working either.\n\nFinally, I just raise my voice and say \"I'm gay\" as a joke.\n\nMy mother grins and shouts, \"I knew it!\"  My dad starts laughing and says \"glad you finally got that out of your system son; we've been waiting for you to come out!\"  Everyone starts laughing and congratulating me because of my parents' response while I'm furiously looking for a shovel to dig myself out of this hole I've just created.  \n\nMy friend's dad elbows him and laughs, saying \"I guess that's why he spends so much time with you eh boy?\"  \n\nMy friend starts to say, \"I know you're joking dad, but since Trompson admitted it, I guess I'll just come out and say-\"\n\nAt this point I had just stood up and practically shouted \"It was a joke!\"  A few seconds of really awkward silence followed and my mother looked hurt.  I explained \"I know you guys would be supportive and everything, but really; I'm not gay.\"  More awkward silence followed.  I stammered out \"I...I got to go\" and ran for the bathroom.  There's no window in here and now I'm trapped.  And the Broncos are losing.", "summary": "I joked that I was gay, my friend might actually be gay, the Broncos are losing, and I'm camping out in the bathroom for as long as I can."}
{"id": "t3_3jtmrq", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "(Moral Question) Should I include my 1/8-1/16 Cherokee heritage on college and scholarship forms?", "post": "I feel extremely conflicted. I know that some scholarships don't even require that much heritage in order to give some money or take some cost off of tuition, but I don't know whether I would be taking money away from people who are legitimately oppressed or have experienced negative things because of their heritage. My family is asking me to find as much money for college as I can (I have a job, my mom is on disability with a muscular disease, and my dad doesn't want to support me in the way he should attempt), but I'm in constant worry that I won't have enough money to get a start even with scholarships. However, I am still conflicted about putting this on forms, as I don't want to hurt people in different situations. Please help, reddit.", "summary": "I am primarily white in heritage, but have enough Cherokee heritage to qualify for some scholarships, but don't want to harm people in worse situations"}
{"id": "t3_3w3b4l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[LDR] I (16 M) broke up with my girlfriend (16 F) after about 5-6 months. It didn't affect me", "post": "To start off, yeah I know we're teenagers and stuff happens, don't rant about the age. \n\nSo I met her over a year ago, she lives nearby l, I was really nervous to meet her but I was going to try. I took too long, she said she moved to Missouri and probably wouldn't be coming back. I decided that I'd try to make it work. We went through a lot, I got her to stop hurting herself and she seemed a lot happier. Occasionally she told me guys kissed her but shit happens, she's far away and girls like attention I can't blame her. But I \"loved\" her, a lot of people say it takes years so I put quotations around it. Let's just say I cared a lot about her. The feeling was mutual between us. \n\nBut we start dating and not just being friends. We had snapchatted but her dad was protective I guess so she couldn't talk until recently (still haven't talked to this day). I could probably call her now. But to get back on topic we cared about each other but she had guys for friends that were assholes and kissed her knowing she was with someone. She tells me she was feeling unsure about us, I send her a long cute message and sleep. Wake up to her saying I was the only guy she ever wanted to be with and stuff because I was so sweet and whatever else. \n\nFew days go by, pictures on her story of her hugging and kissing a guy. Bothers the hell out of me and it hurts at first. I stop talking to her and it just fell off. I didn't feel bad really at all. Previously I'd be burrowing in depression and being a bitch. But it didn't bother me. I established that we're just friends and I need time. If she moved back I'd consider getting back with her blah blah blah.\n\nThe point was that either I've gotten disattached or just grown out of feeling bad for myself. Still not sure if it's a bad thing but I feel better than ever really.", "summary": "LDR ends when she kisses a guy and starts dating him, I don't feel upset like I previously would be. I feel good now, don't know if it's bad."}
{"id": "t3_4ly1yc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my ?friend? [17 F] she wants a 'festival-length' stand again", "post": "Well this is a strange question, but here it goes.\nI had been with a girl in a festival last year and I quite fell in love with her, we had sex and the next 6 month was quite rough for me since we lived far away and we spoke a lot, but she wanted to remain friends after all. It was hard but I accepted it. Now we'll be going to the same festival this year, and she said that \"everything will be the same\" and I don't know how should I feel about this.\n\nIt's true, it'd be great, but still I know that she does not mean it seriously at all, and I'm looking for a more serious relationship, also I just want to have fun with my other friends. \n\nOn the other hand I don't want to upset her either, which I guess I'd be doing if I said no or something along those lines.\n\nSo what is your opinion on this? What should I do?", "summary": "A girl I was \"with\" during a festival wants to get back together in the same festival this year, but I'm not sure about it. What should I do without upsetting her?"}
{"id": "t3_1oxrad", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend of 2+ years (19F) cheated on me (28M) a year ago, hid it until four months ago, and is taking no steps toward fixing the underlying problem.", "post": "First off, yes the age difference is huge.  I guess I was dumb for expecting a result of anything different.\n\nMy girlfriend cheated on me a year ago.  She told me it was because we were having problems with her feeling anything sexually, and she wanted to see if it was me or her.  She ended up not feeling anything with him (supposedly) and ended it after trying twice with him.  \n\nShe never told me she did this, and hid it from me for eight months until we'd reached a point in our relationship where I felt like I wasn't being a good enough boyfriend to her.  I asked if she cheated, and it took her about an hour to admit it.  We spent three days apart and I took her back on the condition she sees a doctor to see if the sexual issue is a medical problem.\n\nFour months later, she hasn't taken any steps toward this goal.  I bring it up, and she says \"yeah I need to do that\".  But nothing afterwards.  Last night, I had it.  I told her she needs to get it done or I walk.  She made an appointment, but she refuses to admit that something is wrong.  She later told me that she cheated also to see if it was just that she wasn't attracted to me anymore.  She wouldn't even give me the name of the person or where she met him until I pryed it out of her.  \n\nI'm at my wits end.  I know I should leave, but I don't know if I can.  I know I deserve somebody who won't keep things from me, but... I don't know.  I've been one of those \"forever alone\" types in the past, and going back to that scares me.  She says I'm important to her, but she may not value our relationship enough to admit she may be the problem.  She's agreed to couples counseling at our college, but What the hell do I do?", "summary": "She cheated, I found out, took her back because she said she'd try to get help, she hasn't done it after four months.  Do I leave?"}
{"id": "t3_30abb5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] going through breakup with gf of 2 years [21F], can't bear going no-contact", "post": "After browsing this sub it seems that the most common advice for people going through a breakup is to go no contact. However this really is easier said than done. My gf and I have been broken up for about a week now and I constantly find myself wanting to be with her and talk to her. She has been my best friend for years and I see her on a daily basis (we work together). Any time something good or bad happens in my day she is the first person I want to tell (and vice versa), and I want that to continue regardless of whether she is my girlfriend or just my friend. \n\nWe had been having difficulties recently, as she has expressed how she frequently misses being single. We have a very open and honest relationship so as much as it hurt to hear, we talked through it and ultimately decided the best thing to do is break up. We still really care about each other and I just don't believe that no-contact is the best way for us to go through this time. \n\nShe has been the most important person in my life for a while now, and I had always believed that even if we didn't end up together, we would remain an important part of each other's lives. Am I completely unrealistic in thinking this? I want to stay friends with her and let the feelings fade away naturally. Has anyone here ever successfully remained friends with their ex without going no-contact?", "summary": "Gf of two years said she misses being single, we both want to remain friends. How do I healthily move on without cutting her out of my life?"}
{"id": "t3_2zgi0a", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "8th grade science project: my kid's partner's parents spent $90, and want me to pay my share", "post": "My kid and his partner were tasked with making marshmallow shooters in their science class.  They had to design,build and operate the shooter in class, measuring the distance traveled on a shot, the velocity of the marshmallow, etc.  All good.\n\nAs I'm on my way home from work, my son calls me to ask me to pick up some cash to pay for his portion of the project.  \"No problem buddy, how much do you need?\" \"$45, my partner spent $90.\" It's due tomorrow.\n\nAm I alone in my WTF reaction?  I have the money, that's not the issue.  I *can* easily afford the $45, however I think it's completely outrageious. Spending this kind of cash on an 8th grade science project is completely crazy, and out of proportion to what's supposed to be happening in school.  It smacks, to me, of buying a grade.  Further, I don't think this is a good intro to engineering, as most people engineering a solution to problem X, have to find a solution within Y time, and under Z budget.\n\nI wrote the science teacher and the principal, and am meeting with the principal tomorrow morning to discuss this.  I told the science teacher that my kid is not to be paired with the $90 gun project.  We went to Home Depot this morning at 6am, and purchased parts for my kid's own gun, and had the PVC cut for us, for $4.28.\n\nBy way of background, we live in a fairly affluent district.  I can't say the overspending really surprised me.  I do think this teaches kids out-of-whack priorities and habits.", "summary": "$90 for 8th grade science project; out of line, or not? Am I out of line for refusing to pay?"}
{"id": "t3_24ntx2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25] looking to...advance my relationship with [23F]", "post": "Some background: Been with my girlfriend for 9 months now, 5 of which I've unfortunately been on the other side of the country but we skype once a week. She was visiting her sister who I work with where I live so that's how we met. \nShe lives about 7 hours from me and doesn't drive(yet) so I've been visiting her once a month for weekends(not including said 5 months). \nShes a very shy girl, her sister says she's had a boyfriend before but I doubt it went very far, had a sheltered upbringing.\n\nSo basically I got back home a month ago and went up to visit her for a week. Before I left for those months our 'contact' had included holding hands everywhere, cuddling on her bed, making out and has pretty much stayed the same. \nWhen cuddling she seems very protective, pulling her shirt over her midriff and guarding her chest when we make out(would say I've only barely made 2nd base). \nWe've both said we love each other and mailed each other valentines presents including a card where she wrote: 'you are the most wonderful guy i can't wait to see you again, I love and miss you' etc.\n\nI'm quite inexperienced in this as well as her so I need some help here guys, we both want a long term relationship but I need to get her out of her shell without being too aggressive, I have so little time when we see each other. \nShould I try talking to her? what should I say?\nI am trying to get my company to transfer me to where she lives as there's no way she would work here(town of 20000 vs 1 million) but probably won't happen until this time next year.", "summary": "Been with my girl for 9 months, both very shy and inexperienced, looking for advice on how to advance our relationship."}
{"id": "t3_2830py", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "My exclusive hookup of five months is suddenly acting weird...What should I do?", "post": "Ok so i met this girl during my last semester of college (I just graduated) and we have been exclusive more or less the entire semester. It was going great, and still was for a couple of weeks after we went home. We would call each other, say how much we missed each other, but at no point did we ever talk seriously about being in a relationship. We made plans for the summer where we would visit each other, and go to events, and she even came to me to see a Yankee game. Next week she is going to EDC Las Vegas, and has been acting extremely cold, saying how she doesn't really want to put any effort into making this work,picking petty fights, and how when she's away in Vegas she doesn't want to feel guilty if she hooks up with someone there. I told her that I completely understand if she did considering its Vegas and she is going to be there for almost a week straight partying. My question is do I just forget it and move on, or do I wait until she gets back to see if after Vegas she wants to put in more effort? It's been eating me up the past few days and I could really use some more opinions. I have told my friends the situation and they just think she wants to have fun in Vegas and when she gets back she'll be a little more like the ay she was. What does Reddit think? She has told me multiple times how happy I make her, and every single person that is close to her has said how much happier she is. Her family has said how it only took her 21 years to find someone that actually makes her happy. This is another reason I'm kind of stuck.", "summary": "This girl I have been exclusive with for 5 months suddenly is acting strange before going to EDC Las Vegas. Do I forget her or do I wait and see what happens afterwards?"}
{"id": "t3_2qx1fz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with my ex [26F] had a 6 month relationship. Broke up because of grief issues.", "post": "We've been together for about 6 months. The time together was magnificent. We are very similar and connected really good. She's had issues with previous boyfriends and was not capable of opening up to basically anyone. Except me, she felt really safe with me and she told me things she told to no-one. \n\nShe's got problems with her family since she was born. She's got a handicapped sister. About three years ago, her mother was diagnosed with cancer. She barely survived but until this day she's clean. A year after she was done with the treatment her father was also diagnosed with cancer. Unfortunately he passed away a year ago. Shortly after that she broke up with an abusive boyfriend.\n\nAll has been going really well. Until a week before Christmas. Christmas was the time of the year for her family. Unfortunately its also really hard because she's missing her father. Which she did since he passed away, but she's never felt this way before since he passed away. In that very same week, she didn't have any feelings for me, all out of a sudden. She decided to break up because she didn't want to let me waiting until the feeling might come back. This was on Christmas eve.\n\nMy bet is that she's going through a really, really tough time with feelings going all over the place. She doesn't know what to do with it, and because she met me and opened up, the feelings of grief might even be stronger. \n\nThe strangest thing is that, a day before she broke up she texted me that she misses me. During the break up she even told me that she really likes and cares about me, and that she might make a huge mistake. \n\nSo, I have two questions:\n1. Do you guys think we could get back together?\n2. I have the feeling that I have to be there for her, but for the sake of my shitty feelings I shouldn't contact her. What would you guys have done?", "summary": "Had a good relationship. Ex felt like shit because of grief. Lost feelings for me within a week because she felt depressed. Decided to break up because it wouldn't be fair to me."}
{"id": "t3_18r8f3", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Bad kisser or no chemistry? [20F] [21M]", "post": "I have been spending a lot of time with this guy I met about a month ago. I was physically attracted to him from the start, and grew to like his personality as well. We have been on a couple of dates in addition to hanging out as friends, and I really enjoy spending time with him. The problem is that he's great in when we're just hanging out, but if things start to get romantic he gets incredibly awkward and nervous and it just turns me off. When we've kissed I felt no sparks. If anything I just really want to break it off. \n\nI am very inexperienced with dating/relationships. I had never even kissed anybody before him. So, at first I chalked the bad kissing up to awkwardness on my part. After doing it a couple of other times though, my feelings haven't really changed. I'm starting to think I just don't have chemistry with him. What makes it complicated is that I do feel physically attracted to him, but when we kiss it just goes away. Could he just be a bad kisser?\n\nI don't want to lead him on if it turns out we don't have chemistry, but I also want to give this a chance because I like him. Any advice?", "summary": "Can't figure out if I have no chemistry with a guy I've been seeing or if he's just a bad kisser."}
{"id": "t3_1ft6br", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (23f) am suspicious that my long term on and off bf (26m) is cheating on me.", "post": "He has a history of flirting with other girls and I'm not too sure if he physically cheated on me in the past, or if it was just flirtations and nudes via the internet. Today he lied about where he was going, and didn't want me to come along. I peeked at his phone because it makes a neat water dribbling look when you touch it so i was playing around doing that, when it opened to a text msg from a girl, saying they were going to meet. I am not sure if he just didn't tell me because he thought I'd over react if he hung out with a girl? Or if he was going for other intentions. He first asked if he was going to go over to her house, then they decided to meet somewhere else.", "summary": "bf texting other girls asking to go over, planning to meet up with them, is he cheating or is he just hanging out with friends? Am I paranoid?"}
{"id": "t3_167gcz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21M) am falling for best friend (19F) and I'm not sure what to do.", "post": "We officially met about two years ago, before that we had gone to the same high school but never talked much. When we first met she was dating one of my good friends, and she had also got a job at the same place as me. We worked together a lot and would chat and occasionally hang out after work and started to become very good friends. Eventually her and her now ex broke up and I had developed a small crush but tried to repress my feelings for her because:\n\n1.) She was my good friend's ex.\n\n2.) We worked together.\n\n3.) I didn't want to ruin any sort of friendship we had. \n\nWe remained good friends, hanging out a lot with mutual friends or going out to eat or just sitting around listening to music. We started getting to know each other more and more, and seeing each other more and more. She is very similar to me, prideful, tends to be hot-headed but rational, likes a lot of things I like, is vocal about her opinion. We seem to really connect. \n\nAfter the this summer I quit my job and got a new one, while she stayed on for another month before finding somewhere else to work. Even though we weren't working together anymore we were still making plans 3-4 times a week, and I started to be more in tune with my feelings towards her. Now its the start of the new year, and I've accepted that I have very strong feelings for her, but I'm unsure how to proceed. I was wondering who else here has been in any kind of situation like this, and how it worked out for them.\n\nShould I tell her my feelings, or keep it to myself? Is it worth it risking our closeness to pursue a relationship? If we do date how should I handle my friend(her ex)? I have a sort of plan that I intend to put in motion in a couple weeks to ask her on a date. I can provide more details on that if anyone wants to know. \n\nI appreciate all advice and insight.", "summary": "Friends for two years/co-workers for one. I've developed feelings that extend beyond friendship and am unsure on how to proceed. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_1k73vk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it normal to fantasize sexually about your ex? [F19]", "post": "It hasn't been long since my boyfriend and I broke up. We had great sex chemistry and I would often fantasize about sex together throughout the day and before I slept. I guess it's become a habit..?\n\nNow that we're broken up, I don't know if it's okay to. On one hand, I think it's just dirty thoughts, everyone has them. He's been my first and only sexual partner and I'm not really attracted to anyone else right now. On the other hand, I'm afraid it'll make it harder for me to move on.\n\nLately, I've been forcing myself not to, but my sexual frustration is manifesting through my dreams! For 3 days in a row now, I keep having dreams about doing sexual things/having sex/getting physical affection from 3 different guy friends. I don't know what's wrong with me.", "summary": "Been having sex dreams about different guys since I force myself to stop having dirty thoughts about my ex. I don't know if it's normal."}
{"id": "t3_3swmgi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my ex gf [21 F] of 2 1/2 years, trying to take things slowly, not sure if it's a good idea though?", "post": "Sorry if this comes out poorly formatting-wise,doing this on phone.\n\nMy ex and I dated for 2 1/2 years. We met at college and quickly became great friends which led to us dating. Throughout the relationship she stressed that she wasn't one for relationships and was only involved in one with me because she loved me so much (we were each our first serious relationship).\n\nThroughout our time together she kissed another guy once and swore it'd never happen again and broke up with me once only to reconcile a week later and apologize. Around 5 months ago she broke up with me again, saying shewanted to be single her final year of college. She claimed she still loved me and if she had to be with someone it'd be me.\n\nI tried to move on and cut contact but she kept finding a way to stay relevant in my life, even though several times I asked her if she wanted to get back together to which she replied no. She said she jusy wanted to hook-up with other guys, which she has during our time apart.\n\nAs I've said, she's kept in contact despite me asking her to stop and have even had to take her to the hospital at one point. A week ago she showed up at my house saying she missed me and we agreed to meet for lunch to sort things out.\n\nAt lunch we agreed we still loved each other very much and that we should take things slowly. She says that if she finds that I'm not what she wants that she will end it for my sake. It's been a few days now and i just can't help but feel that she isn't nearly as serious about us as I am.\n\nMy question is should i even bother with the relationship at this point? I do love her but she's just such a pain in the ass and has caused me so much grief. I should note we are both graduating in May and are most likely moving to different states. Thanks for any help or insight you can give if you managed to get this far.", "summary": "Gf of 2 1/2 years dumped me for the 2nd time5 months ago, kept in contact and agreed to take things slow. Should I even bother?"}
{"id": "t3_1ge375", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[20M] is curious how to comfort my girlfriend[20F] about her regrets with her ex.", "post": "I have been dating my girlfriend for a year now. This is my first relationship and im new to a lot of things. We are really close and going strong. But every once and a while she gets reminded of her previous boyfriend(she dated for one year) and becomes sad and feels down for a while. She has regrets about a guy that cheated on her and she is having trouble forgetting about him and moving on.\n\n I always tell her that it takes time, and ill always be there for her. We normally settle the current sadness and move on, but I can tell she is still upset a little.\n\nI am really patient and always comfort her, but I am just looking for tips on how to comfort her further about this topic. And am looking for more information on break ups and when its normal to get over someone, and how can I help her more?", "summary": "Girlfriend gets sad over things that remind her of her ex-boyfriend who treated her bad and I am curious on how to help her and comfort her further. "}
{"id": "t3_1rmqsd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 F] with my boyfriend [21 M] 10 months, love boyfriend, but feeling conflicted", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend for 9 months, and even though it's a short time, I still love him so much. There is no one else I feel more comfortable with, and I can see myself being with for a very long time.\n\nBut recently, I've been wanting to be with other people. There was one guy, who is actually a mutual friend of ours, that I've been attracted to and wanted to hook up with. We kept hanging out because I never thought I would cheat on my boyfriend. We drank and did hook up. Nothing beyond kissing. He doesn't know. Neither of us want to say anything because we don't want to hurt him or for things to get weird.\n\nI regret it, but also enjoyed it, which I feel worse about. I'm afraid it could happen again and I wouldn't want to stop myself. I felt this way before over the summer but thought it was just because we weren't together as often. Those feelings went away, but are clearly back again. I don't want to have these feelings because I do love him so much, but they don't seem to be going away.\n\nI don't know if I should end things and potentially lose someone that I love and might not find someone else that could ever compare to him, or I should refocus myself and maybe talk to him about things and work on my relationship.", "summary": "I love my boyfriend. Keep having thoughts of wanting to be single/with other people. Cheated. Don't know whether to stay or go."}
{"id": "t3_1qqrr4", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I started crying again.", "post": "I can't explain why but throughout my childhood my parents harassed me when I cried.\n\nBoth my mother and father would laugh at me and call me names. I was only about 5 years old.\n\nI cried when I was hurt or when I sad and would laugh and call me a \"faker\". When I didn't stop they would get angry and I'd get spanked until I shut up.\n\nI stopped crying at about 8 years old. I just never did it because I didn't want to get in trouble.\n\nMy parents were nicer too. They didn't laugh at me or spank me.\n\nWhen I was 13 my mom died from leukemia. It was really sad, and I did cry when my dad told me she was going to die. I cried so loud the neighbors called the cops. My voice was sore when I said goodbye to her.\n\nAfter that it was just my dad and I. He didn't really know how to raise me. Mom usually did that while he worked. He started beating me when I got into trouble, and wouldn't stop until I didn't cry anymore.\n\nLife wasn't easy. My grades were bad and I was kicked out of school for poor grades. \n\nBut I'm 18 now, and is been almost a year since he's hurt me. I cry when I'm sad now, and it's awesome.\n\nI'm not weak, I'm not faking. I'm sad, and I'm crying, and I feel better after.", "summary": "Parents didn't allow their daughter to cry, lead to a shitty life, now I'm 18 and crying is awesome."}
{"id": "t3_kxty4", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I keep pushing friends away. I Like hanging out in groups, but not 1 on 1.", "post": "I need help/advice. I'm 22 now, so most of my friends are in different states for college. I am anxious most of the time, crave alone time when I'm out with a friend, and can be very introverted. I like hanging out with large groups of friends, as almost anything can be made fun this way. However, due to my location, this is hardly ever the case.\n\nI haven't seen or talked to any of my friends in a very very long time now. The only person I see regularly is my girlfriend. I have friends I talk to, but no actual close friends. I complain of feeling lonely, but if a friends asks to hang out, I feel almost sick just thinking about it. This leads my friends to think I'm being distant, or that I don't value their friendship. \n\nIt's just so awkward when it's me and 1 other friend alone. Nothing fun to do. Mostly quiet awkward talks. \n\nAny advice?...anything? Not sure what's wrong with me.\n\nThank you,\n-Heather", "summary": "lonely/bored. like groups of friends. hate 1 on 1. Only get 1 on 1 offers b/c most friends are far away for college."}
{"id": "t3_1qmja0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M/F] with my ex [23 M/F] of 3 yrs, want to cut ties but I still have his stuff, and he owes me money", "post": "So me and my BF of three years broke up, he's currently living out of town (a few hours away) I'm better off but I still need time (long relationship) \n\na week after I told him he had to pick up his stuff next saturday, (he saw the message but did not reply), that sat at like 8pm he said he could not come that sat I told him to get somebody else to pick it up then. (he left 4 boxes and owes me about $200 for rent and tickets) Nobody came to pick up the stuff. Finally a Day or two ago I had a friend tell him to pick up his stuff and pay me back, he said he would but I'm wary he won't for a long time.\n\n I want to get his stuff out of the house so I can stop thinking about it, move on etc. I also want to start dating again but feel like this is holding me back 'cause I can't move out of this chapter til it's all over.", "summary": "Ex: won't pick up the stuff he left at my place or give me back the money he owes me, and I feel Like it's getting in the way of my \"moving on\""}
{"id": "t3_iqhr6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is the most unusual pet peeve you have ever heard of?", "post": "One day while hanging out with my boyfriend in our apartment, the topic of pet peeves came up. Living together for almost two years now, we pretty much know what bothers one another but decided to recap for the hell of it.  We went back and forth listing the usual annoyances like smacking gum, scraping ones fork across their plate and using the caps lock button instead of shift when typing.  But then I mentioned that I hated the toilet in our apartment because of the splash it creates.  My boyfriend sat back and looked at me as if I was insane and asked \"why the hell would that bother you?\"\n\n I proceeded by saying that I absolutely despise when you are taking a shit and the water splashes on your ass. I explain to him that I angle my ass in a certain way, sitting very close to the edge of the toilet so that it does not make a huge splash and hit me with toilet water, although it is difficult to do in our apartment toilet because it's just like taking a shit in a bucket. He then laughs hysterically at me for a good three minutes and tells me that is the weirdest pet peeve he has ever heard of.\n\nNow I, feeling like I am insane, ask him how he goes about avoiding the splash then. He tells me \"why would I worry about that? So what if it splashes you, you just wipe it off when you are done.\"  Throughout his entire explanation I cringe at the thought of having that cold, possibly soiled water hit my bare ass and decide that there must be others out there who feel the same as I do.  It can't be the weirdest pet peeve out there. In fact I don't know of a pet peeve I've heard of that I can't at least understand the annoyance or distaste for. I would actually like to hear one that I can say \"what the fuck,\" to, so this is why I'm asking.\n\nReddit, what is the weirdest pet peeve you have ever heard of?", "summary": "My biggest pet peeve is shitting in the toilet and having the water splash my ass. My boyfriend thinks that's the weirdest thing ever, I think there could be weirder. Heard of any?"}
{"id": "t3_138rn2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I outsmart the landlady who is thus far failing to provide acceptable furniture and is being passive aggressive?", "post": "I should probably preface by saying that I'm living in France, in case anyone has any habitation rights savoir faire!\n\nI moved into my apartment on the first of October this year, and when I arrived to my 'furnished' flat, I noticed some things were missing... I had no cooker, no washing machine, a broken fridge, no cleaning equipment and no other furniture in my room other than a bed.\n\nNow, for 350 euros a month, this is weird. She got me a second hand, unclean fridge. I just cleaned it without complaining because I needed a fridge. Here's where she starts to get passive aggressive. She managed to call me several times on my number before, but when I started to press harder for the necessary furniture she left a note stuffed in my letter box that said 'thisisrage182, can you give me your ACTUAL phone number please?' (in French of course).\n\nLittle weird... there's nothing wring with my phone. Whenever I call she says that she can't find a cooker, that her husband is working so she can't come over, that she doesn't have a car big enough. I'm living out of my suitcase here, and eating microwave food.\n\nThis week she said that she had found me a better bed (not really in my list of priorities, but I was hardly going to say no) so I asked her to make sure she didn't call me in school hours as I'm a teacher. She called while I was in class and then said the bed will now have to wait because I didn't answer my phone.\n\nLast but certainly not least, today she came directly to my flat to announce that my rent is one day late and that she is considering taking action on it... I asked for a direct payment method to be set up at the bank but they obviously hadn't set it up. Seriously though, coming to my house all fussy over one day and a mistake after living here for over a month!\n\nPlease help me get around this bitch!!!", "summary": "My landlady has left me without necessary furniture and demands that I pay the full rent on time even though she has avoided her own responsabilities for 6 weeks. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_lc3o1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Help me Reddit! I don't know how to fully trust my boyfriend again.", "post": "Really long, sorry.\nI have been with him for over two years and I love him to death. We're best friends and lovers. Anyhow, he has cheated on me twice in the past two years that I know of. Nothing physical, but he invited some girl over after I left his house (she didnt go over) & recently he contacted his ex and got naked pictures from her. He denied both even after I had the proof in front of me. He said he didn't know what he was thinking, but could never give me an answer as to why he did it. A friend of his, who became a better friend to me, told me that she is pretty sure he has cheated on numerous girlfriends. He's super protective when guys he isn't friends with talk to me. I love him more than anything, but lately hes become kinda closed about who he talks to and erases all his stuff before handing me his phone. Idk, maybe im paranoid. He has made many many changes for me & he knows I feel like this because I talk to him about it & all he does is cry & say that I'm his world & if I leave he'll start drinking again (he's an alcoholic) & hate his life. The trust is still lacking & it's really hard for me to get it back. He seems to think that I should be over it because he said he was sorry. What do you guys think? Am i wasting my time? He's 24 & i'm 21.", "summary": "my boyfriend of two years has cheated twice, nothing physical, & im wondering if im wasting my time or if he really is sorry."}
{"id": "t3_3lzpze", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Husband (25m) Unsure of How To Deal With Wife's (20f) Anger", "post": "Hey all,\n\nLet me preface this by saying that my wife had a tough growing up with a mildly abusive father (verbally abusive, mildly physically abusive).  \n\nArguments frequently become heated and my wife has a tough time dealing with her anger.  Seemingly minor things spiral way out of control, leading to her mentally breaking down, throwing things (sometimes at me), sometimes breaking things.  I fear for my safety when this happens; she say she would hurt herself before she touched me, but it's still a very scary thing to be around.  She mentions seeing a therapist, but never follows through and sometimes accuses me of being the problem, usually apologizing later.\n\nI try my best to diffuse arguments before they get this way but I feel frustrated that my attempts to calm her seem futile.  Whereas her physical actions seem minor, I still fear for my safety when we argue because of her mental instability.   I am not denying that I can improve at being a good husband in many ways, but my actions do not justify this behavior.  I'm scared for both of our safety.\n\nExample from our last argument:  She ended up raging, punching the pillow beside my head where i was laying down several times at full strength.  Did she hit me?  No.  Was it still scary as hell?  Yes.", "summary": "wife borders on physical abuse and I feel like I'm putting up with it when I shouldn't be.  She's still my best friend with many redeeming qualities and I want to make it better, though."}
{"id": "t3_4hlysl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my boyfriend [27 M] of 6 moths, suggested I go on an SSRI to help me last longer in bed. Is that normal?", "post": "Sorry if this is TMI but here we go:\n\nI've been dating my boyfriend for about 6 months.  I think the sex is great, but he's more experienced that I am.  So far, he's seemed to enjoy it.  \n\nI do have a bit of an issue with premature ejaculation, but there's ways we can do it to avoid it (i.e. changing positions, etc).  \n\nHowever, the other day, we were having sex (I was the receptive partner) and I finished about a minute before he did.  He didn't notice, and after he finished, he made a comment about it being my turn to finish.  I told him I already had, and he goes \"I thought I might've come first..... for once.\"  It was a kind of off putting.  He knows its a sensitive subject (LOL).\n\nI told him I was trying my best and doing techniques to last longer each time, to which he replied, \"you know, you could just go on an SSRI, that would just fix everything.\"\n\nI kinda laughed it off, but I was really turned off by that comment.   I'm not opposed to medications at all for their intended use, but asking your SO to go on an SSRI seems pretty serious, especially just for the sexual side effects.  \n\nAm I wrong for being turned off by that comment?", "summary": "My bf suggested I go on an SSRI to last longer in bed, and I'm really weirded out by it.  I'm a right in doing so?"}
{"id": "t3_exxln", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Reddit, I need an idea.", "post": "I'm studying film in college and have many lecturers, who teach all aspects of the creation of film and television, all wonderfully relevant lecturers. But we have one class which is dubbed Philisophical Tradition and our lecturer seems to get kicks out of making our class as vague as he can, with as little link to reality as possible. Take for example my notes from our last class which simply say: \"Freud. Noses are the link? Use dreams as example.\" Utter madness.\n\nWell, we have been given a 2000 word essay to submit within the next 3 days. We have been told we have the freedom to write pretty much anything, our only hint on what the context might be is a quote from the philosopher Arthur Rimbaud, \"I am another.\" An interesting quote, but we have been advised that we don't even have to take that into consideration. We could, if we wanted to, write 500 Haikus about Llamas. \n\nI've considered a host of topics to write about but I can't focus on one thing. What I'm now considering is to conduct some sort of experiment on myself and document it.. Something to do with dreams, hypnosis, sleep deprivation etc.\n\n So that's what I'm asking for, an idea for some form of experiment that I can document, conduct within three days and do so without any harm to myself. I'll post whatever I document if this is all goes according to plan.", "summary": "Need to write vague 2000 word essay for vague class. Would like someone to suggest an experiment I can conduct on my self that won't kill me and that can be documented in written form."}
{"id": "t3_2fgy3r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The guy [24/M] I'm dating [23/F] says there's something missing and I don't know what to do.", "post": "I honestly don't know what to do at this point and I feel so empty. I've been in a long distance relationship with him and we've been going strong for 5 months. He visits me in LA and I visit him in Seattle. I recently visited him in Seattle last weekend for almost a week and not going to lie, the moment i saw him, things seemed \"different\" I kept asking him what's wrong and he said nothing is wrong and that's just how he is. That he is comfortable with me. \na little back story: this guy has liked me since 4 years ago and tried to get with me this whole time and I finally caved in and I really like him now. Even though we're far away from each other, I still wanted to make it work.\n\nAnyways, We had our good times while I was there and I enjoyed every minute of it. Our plan was to move in together within the next couple of months. We even talked about it one more time on my last day in Seattle. He said that he isn't ready and that we should wait a bit more. I was crushed because I was set on moving and everything seemed perfect. When I landed in LA, we talked on the phone and he told me that there's something missing in our relationship and that we seemed \"different\" when I was in Seattle. Like we are not clicking. I knew something was different, but I just thought it was him. But apparently, there was something different between us. I'm so confused. Does he still like me? I don't understand. He's been chasing me for so long and now that he has me, he's not really trying? I still want to be with him, but I dont know if Im willing to wait for him to be \"ready\" He told me to give him some time to think about it, but at this point..if he's already having doubts...isnt it over? Please help, I'm really torn about this. I cant eat or sleep. Should I just move on?", "summary": "The guy I'm dating said that he's not ready and that there's something missing. I really care about him and I dont know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_23gw5b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [f,22] boyfriend [m,23] keeps making baby hints?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together a few years. He has a 3 year old daughter from another relationship whom I love as if she was my own, and she loves me in return. \n\nWe have always talked about having children one day, but pretty soon as we are aware I may become infertile. HOWEVER, when we talk about the possibility of kids around his family, he has also always said \"I don't need any more babies\" which confuses me a fair amount. \n\nLast week, his daughter was staying at our house - for no reason, completely out of the blue, my boyfriend tells us both that he wants lots of kids (2 more girls and 3 boys, he later specified), and asked his little girl if she wanted a brother or sister. At this point, she was pretty excited, running around saying \"yes daddy, I want a brother and sister!\" and he then asked her how soon she wanted a brother or sister, to which she didn't reply, but he told her \"anything for you princess, daddy and confusedbabygirl will see what we can do!\" Since then he has continued to be very blunt when i've talked about wanting a child or saying the usual \"I don't need any more babies.\" \n\nReddit - how do I get him to tell me what he's really thinking? I've tried being direct and asking him if he wants kids, but he's really vague and confusing! I'm sorry if this doesn't make any sense, i'm not very good with words.", "summary": "My boyfriend told me he wants kids. He also promised his 3 year old daughter that we'd give her a brother or sister soon, but he's so blunt and vague whenever I bring up the topic with him. "}
{"id": "t3_xt0hh", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [19/f] feel like a third wheel when my boyfriend [20/m] and I hang out with his friend.", "post": "A little history: dated two years long distance, finally going to the same school. He has a lot of Mormon friends, so his friend group has dwindled because they're all on their missions.\n\nBasically, it's down to me, my SO, and his friend (we'll call him Jake). When the three of us hang out one of two things will happen; either Jake feels like a third wheel because my boyfriend and I will hold hands (which is the only sign of affection we ever show each other in front of people), or I feel like a third wheel if we don't hold hands, because my boyfriend will pay more attention to Jake and talk more to him. I try to involve myself in their conversations, but when they talk about basketball and working out there's really not much I can do. \n\nIt's come down to my boyfriend deciding that the three of us can't hang out together anymore because at the end of the night either Jake or I will be unhappy. What am I supposed to do? How do I make things better? I really dislike the fact that it's come down to this.", "summary": "when my boyfriend and I hang out with a friend of his, me or the friend ends up feeling like a third wheel"}
{"id": "t3_1e9pvd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "GF[24] pushes question of future/marriage but I[M26] am feeling rushed.", "post": "I've been dating my girlfriend for about a year now and things have progressed relatively quickly. Within a year, she has told me that she wants to spend the rest of her life with me, eventually get married and have kids. \n\nUnfortunately, I am not yet on that level. I have fallen in love with her but this is the first time I have been in a very committed relationship. I feel that there is no way for me to know if she is 'the one' within a year's time. \n\nThis is a hot button issue for us each time it comes up. She wants reciprocity for the emotions she is feeling but I know I can't give it to her. When I start to give wishy-washy answers (because it's still a big question mark in my head), she becomes upset. It's to a point where I placate her instead of being able to talk honestly. \n\nI find the whole issue frustrating because I am happy with the relationship but feel no need to rush those questions. For her, it's frustrating because she does not want to feel as if she is wasting time with me if marriage isn't possible. \n\nI feel like this is a classic problem many young couples encounter but I am seriously stuck on how to navigate these conversations without heated arguments.", "summary": "Girlfriend knows she wants a life/marriage/kids with me but I am still new to it all and don't know yet. She gets angry at the lack of reciprocity."}
{"id": "t3_1k4dvc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What should I major in? Something that makes me money or something that I'm good at?", "post": "So this might be long but I've run out of people to ask for advice. I am currently going to be a junior in the Journalism School and I'm on track to study Strategic Communication, specifically advertising. I've always been a really indecisive person and I knew I would have a hard time choosing a major. Lately i've been second guessing the journalism route because of a multitude of things, like people and the internet suggesting I won't find a job (I spend way too much time on reddit and it is SO anti-humanities), the fear that the job with be low paying, and the thought that I'm wasting my time in college and should have gone to trade school because I'm not in STEM. I don't want to be scared about my future job prospects. I'm the type of person that needs to feel confident about what I'm doing.\n\nI went to talk to the career counselor about my fears and he was super reassuring. He said its best to do something you're good at and that \"people find jobs\" and I have nothing to worry about. I then asked if he would give the same advice to an Art History major and he said \"Of course I would, they find good jobs as well and nothing is limited by major.\" Is that true? Because it scared the shit out of me. He didn't help at all by saying that. All I could think of was the old \"have fun serving coffee in 4 years, blah blah\" and he seemed to think Art History and Philosophy were excellent choices in major.\n\nSo the other day I came up with the idea of keeping my same J-school major but taking the med-school prerequisite courses as well. I know, you can't just decide to be premed, but I kinda did. Honestly I just want to have a financially secure future and not be worried and I thought it would give me a backup plan. Is this a good idea?\n\nAnd then I looked up the stats for med-school and realized its hard as fuck to get in and my GPA is already lower than what most school want, so theres that.\\ Does anyone have any advice? Major suggestions? I'm so lost...", "summary": "I'm thinking about changing my major because I don't think I will make enough money as I could in other areas, but I'm realizing other areas may now be out of reach."}
{"id": "t3_3hne5e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Serious red flag? My [23F] boyfriend [27M] doesn't take finances seriously?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been living with relatives for over a year. It has been a great way for me to build my savings nest, get on my feet financially and with my career, and of course to have much lower expenses. My boyfriend also recently got a new job. He seemed just as enthusiastic as I did about moving out, saving up, and getting our own place. We also seemed to share the same dislike of frivolousness.\n\nCue my red flag: yesterday he informed me that he spent over 1k on an outfit for an event that we are going to. I don't feel that he will use this outfit enough to justify the price tag. I also feel like that money would have been better spent on the apartment that we have talked so much about getting together. Now I don't think he takes finances seriously, and that he is short-sighted with his money. Am I over-reacting? This is potentially a huge deal breaker for me because I personally feel that bad financial judgement is indicative of larger issues.", "summary": "I feel like boyfriend spent an unreasonable amount of money, now considering that he might not take finances seriously which is a huge red flag for me."}
{"id": "t3_1v7ad5", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by, what else, shitting my pants.", "post": "This is just a plain sad story of a commuter student who trusted one too many farts. There have been many close calls in my career as a commuter student, days where the need to poo struck my bowels with the force of a Rancor, but today was not one of those days. I felt no real need to drop a duece, but I have been somewhat flatulant of late. So right as I pull into the parking lot of school I let one rip. \n\nThen I feel the wetness. Or so I think. Sometimes they can feel wet but not be. So I finger check. \n\nThen I feel the shame. And I feel further shame as I hobble into my first class of the day and sit on the load in my pants. People start looking around wondering what that smell could be....just kidding.", "summary": "NEVER trust a fart, handicapped stalls are the best for underwear removal, and if you ever need a reason to skip class...shit your pants."}
{"id": "t3_1hi2mn", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Light cat food?", "post": "I have a cat who has gotten pretty over weight over the past 7 months. The cat and I moved in to a place with my boyfriend and because it's in the city I don't let him go outside on his own anymore. I don't want him to get hit or lost! So I know that has played a role in his weight gain but also my boyfriend had been feeding him in the morning when he left for work and I would feed him again not knowing that! So the cat was eating 2 cups a day!! So once I realized that I reduced him to 1 cup. We went to the vet and he weighs 13 pounds!! He needs to lose some weight in order to be healthy and I saw the brand of food I feed him has a light version? We feed him chicken soup for the pet lover's soul. I was just curious how other cat owners feel about \"light\" cat food? Or maybe if you have a different food recommendation?!", "summary": "I have a fat cat that doesn't get much exercise anymore. What is your reaction to \"light\" cat food? Do you have any recommendations besides the chicken soup for the pet lover's soul food?"}
{"id": "t3_10yvw1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "The surgeon/lab lost a sample for biopsy taken from my father. Is this normal or negligence/malpractice?", "post": "So my father has been struggling with an unknown skin condition for the past few months. After several doctors visits, referrals, prescriptions, and trying every home remedy and lotion under the sun, it has persisted. The skin is almost leather-like and very thick from his face, all the way down his arms, chest and back,  and he develops painful lumps or nodules under the skin that grow and shrink at various spots along the neck, front shoulder, and upper arm. These lumps start the size of a pea and grow to small ping pong balls and then shrink again over the course of a few days time.\n\nHe was referred to have an outpatient surgery early last week to remove one of these lumps so that they could perform a biopsy and find out what exactly is going on with him.\n\nHe returned today to have his stitches removed and find out some preliminary results. The doctor very frankly said that he was sorry but they have \"lost\" the sample that they extracted from his body. No recourse was offered and my father left the office completely stunned at the situation after having the stitches removed.\n\nThe surgery/referral was covered by his medicare and supplementary insurance, all but $92.00. Now this isn't an obscene amount but we are by no means well off. But I find it very disturbing that my father is still left with no idea of what is wrong with him and now will most likely have to undergo ANOTHER surgery in the near future. \n\nIs there anything I can do reddit? Is this grounds for a negligence or Malpractice lawsuit?\n\nI know that this is no place for seeking legal advice but there has to be someone out there that might have gone through something similar or can offer some advice.", "summary": "Father went in to have a lump removed for biopsy that was lost by the lab. Negligence? Malpractice? What do?"}
{"id": "t3_31ir94", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "I'm sick of this song.", "post": "So, I work at a small restaurant, and for the most part me and my coworkers get along. Except when it comes to music.\n\nIn the kitchen we have a small stereo with an aux cord so we can listen to whatever we want while we work. My coworker, John, has been hogging it like crazy. It's just me and John in the kitchen. I will ask for a turn playing music, and he'll grant it, but usually within 20 minutes his ipod is plugged back in, playing his music.\n\nNow, I can enjoy pretty much anything. The problem is, he plays the same 20ish-song playlist EVERY DAY. On repeat. As you can imagine, that gets old really fast.\n\n**THE REVENGE:**\n\nFor the last week I've been fucking with him. Whenever we're really busy, I'll grab his ipod and change it from \"Repeat All\" to \"Repeat Song\". So instead of just looping his playlist, it just starts looping the same song indefinitely.\n\nSince I do this when we're busy, he usually doesn't notice for a good 20 minutes, and when he finally does, he grabs his ipod and goes \"WHAT THE FUCK, STOP\" -- I'm pretty sure he thinks his iPod's malfunctioning.\n\nHowever long it takes, I plan on making him so sick of that playlist he never wants to hear it again.", "summary": "coworker plays the same playlist on repeat every day. I keep switching it to repeat the same single song when he's not looking, slowly driving him mad."}
{"id": "t3_u0i6v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How to stop stray cats from invading my garden?", "post": "Reddit,\nI need help. Stray cats are coming into my garden and ruining all the vegetation planted, including vegetables and herbs. They use it as a litter box and it is foul. My garden is fenced around but these cats can jump almost 5 feet so it doesn't keep them out. I tried predator urine pellets and that didn't work. I can't install the motion activated water sprinklers because of how the house is set up (hard to explain).\n\nThis never happened before, it only recently started when my neighbor decided to feed a cat he took in. He didn't really take it in, he left her outside. It was only one cat but then another cat came and made kitties (now pretty much adult sized). There is also a little dog-house my neighbor installed for the cats to take shelter in. He never took any of them inside his house as far as I can see and they all roam around the neighborhood and peoples backyards. Yesterday I saw that there are new kittens so the cat probably gave birth again. Can I report this to authorities or something?? I live in NYC.", "summary": "Neighbor has been feeding cats that he doesn't take in, a growing number of cats are invading my block and has been pissing and pooping in my garden killing all vegetation. How do I stop it?"}
{"id": "t3_3mfaub", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "My(f22) partner's(m24) ex(f25) is sending me alarming messages", "post": "I've been seeing this guy, K for a little over two months. We have been going on dates and having sex. It's not just a sex thing, this is definitely something that I see (maybe saw, sigh) moving into a relationship in the near future. We just click. \n\nWell, about an hour ago, K's ex, P has been sending me screenshots of texts her and K were having back and forth. Pretty much, she found a picture of me, sent it to him with a bunch of question marks and asked if I'm his new girlfriend. He replied no, and then she sent him a really long message about trust and broken hearts, and how she thought he wasn't talking to any girls right now. He replied that she wasn't his keeper and he can see anyone he wants. \n\nShe then sent me another screenshot showing her replying to him (can't see what he wrote) and said that she would never hang out with him if he has to text her first to start a conversation. And he said back that those comments were why he blocks her, and that she would be invited over if she wasn't so annoying. \n\nThen P sent me messages saying how they dated for many years, never officially broke up but aren't together right now, but still have sex sometimes. She said he told her it was only them. And he told me it was only me. I do not know where those timelines are in correlation with eachother. \n\nI sent the screenshots to K and he said that's his ex and he will call me and explain as soon as he's home from work. P had since sent me a message saying that he blocked her again. It keeps going on with this girl rambling. I don't know how to go about it, or who o believe. \n\nPlease help! I really like this guy, and this girl is very much unstable. I'll send screenshots in a pm, there's way too many to have time to block out info right now.", "summary": "partners ex is sending me messages that make show they are broken up, and she is bothering him. But she is non stop telling me he is cheating. They were recently fuck buddies. "}
{"id": "t3_3ytkeu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32M] with my SO [35F] <1yr Conflicted with feelings about photo taken while sleeping", "post": "I am [32M] she is [35F]. We have been dating under a year.\n\nWe were hanging out together the other night and I fell asleep while we were watching a movie. Unbeknownst to me she took some photos, which are admittedly funny, of me passed out on her shoulder while she was making faces.\n\nWe have some friends we have a kinda of open and joking relationship with. I found out about the photos when she sent them out in a group text to our friends and me about the selfie we took the other night.\nOn one hand I feel weird cause I didn't know about the photos beforehand, on the other I know she doesn't mean any harm by it. I don't want to make a big deal out of it but at the same time I am so torn between thinking it was kinda weird and thinking I am overreacting.\n\nI kinda want to ask her how she'd feel if I did the same, but I think her answer is it wouldn't bother her, but she may think i was more upset than I am. I don't want to dissuade her being playful and carefree, and in the long run it doesn't feel like it is a big deal, but my immediate reaction was kinda wtf...\n\nAm I overthinking this or is this a discussion we should have?", "summary": "Took photos while I was sleeping, playfully shared with friends, I am conflicted between thinking it was weird to take a photo of me sleeping and appreciating that she was being playful."}
{"id": "t3_4k4rls", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[27F] Unconventional dating question: how to ask out a stranger at the grocery store?", "post": "Dear Reddit, \n\nI'm recently single and not even necessarily out on the prowl, but I came across a situation today in which I possibly could've asked out a really cute guy but didn't know how. \n\nJust for a bit of background: I've dated many people in my adult life and been in a few serious relationships, but still looking for the right one. I'm a pretty confident, outgoing woman and have asked out men on several occasions. I don't tend to be too shy if I really want something, however, can be in some situations. \n\nI was at the grocery store today at lunch time and was waiting in line to check out. There was a woman who was having difficulty checking out with her multiple credit cards and people in line were noticeably getting impatient. There were two people in front of me in line, and the person directly in front of me was a very cute guy. Sometimes in these situations people kind of glance around to others waiting for visual commiseration of some sort, surely many of you reading have probably experienced this. \n\nThe cute guy kind of glanced back at me and smiled but I had one of my headphones in listening to music, so I nodded back. I kept noticing him kind of attempting to look my way (or possibly he was just annoyed and waiting, hard to tell). \n\nI kept thinking, \"huh, I'd love to find a way to give this guy my number\". It's hard enough to meet people you think are attractive or interested in dating. I haven't had any real luck with online dating (especially in my current city, which defaults to a hook up culture) and have been thinking about how to meet people in person. \n\nSo I put this to you: how does one takes this kind of situation to the next level? Is it possible to ask someone out with little to no pre-text? Obviously it's risky, you never know someone's situation, but is it just plain weird or gutsy and admirable?", "summary": "wanted to ask out a cute stranger in front of me in line, but couldn't think of sane, reasonable way to do it. Advice and input appreciated!"}
{"id": "t3_3d5rrd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my ex-gf [30 F]. We dated a year, I cheated and we broke up. I want to apologize or do I let sleeping dogs lie?", "post": "I ended up cheating on my girlfriend during a business trip and she found out. She understandably broke up with me as she was completely trusting of me going on this trip with a female co-worker who was always flirty with me. I messed up bad and beyond repair.\n\nI know the trust is gone and we're not going to get back together, but I want to apologize to her for my shitty actions. I wanted your opinion, is it sensible to apologize or would it just dig up bad memories?", "summary": "Cheated on my g/f of 1 year. Was rightly dumped and want to apologize. Let sleeping dogs lie or apologize?"}
{"id": "t3_2n7djh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What do you do when you get cheated on? Could really do with some advice for a guy who's slowly losing his marbles. 25 (M) she's 23 (F) year and a half close relationship", "post": "Not sure if this is the right format or what, but I really need some advice from someone outside the box.\n \nGirlfriend cheated on me on Friday. \nMy first partner cheated on me too and it took months of work with my current/ex girlfriend for me to open up and trust her not to do the same thing. \n\nNow a year and a half later, ive found myself back in the same boat, but this time with the numbness of knowing that everything I'd accomplished in my head with the self security of not getting hurt, has all been wrong.", "summary": "Everything I've told myself for a year and a half to get over being cheated on in a previous relationship is wrong and now I'm completely lost"}
{"id": "t3_1iuz1y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [21/M] advise my teenager sister [17/F] to avoid risky situations without instilling rape fear or guilt?", "post": "I hope the title is not too bad - english is not my first language, sorry. \n\nMy 17-year-old sister recently put herself in a situation which was quite alarming when my mother heard about it. She was drinking (too much) with 2 of her friends and 5 other people she did not know, on a camping beach, near a lake. Nobody was sober enough and some of them took a midnight bath while clearly drunk. I hope I am not overreacting if I think that it is dangerous, mainly because the drowning risk\u2026 Anyway, I realized that even if I gave her some big brother drinking advice (things like \u00ab if you don't feel like drinking because suddenly, the taste of alcohol kinda disgust you, it is time to stop, no matter what your friends tell you to do, you will not have a good time if you continue \u00bb), I never mentioned certain situations (like drowning while drunk).\n\nIn particular, It made me realize that I never told her something like \u00ab dudes flirting with you while drunk sometimes misinterpret your signals (by clumsiness or malignancy) and bad things can happen to you, so do not get too drunk with people you barely know/trust to be able to react well if it happens \u00bb. I want to tell her that and I want to make her understand that it is serious, but something I've understood by reading feminists books/articles is that many women live in a constant (and horrifying) fear of rape, and when some asshole rapes a woman, this woman often feels some guilt, feeling that it's her fault, that she should have been less clumsy, put on less sexy clothes, drunk less, etc.\n\nI do not my sister to feel that way, and moreover, I do not want to be a part of the transmission of this rape culture which blames victims! On the other hand, I want her to understand that this is a serious issue and that even if, in an ideal world without rapists, she shouldn't have to worry about it, she should be aware of this issue and avoid stupidly risky situations.\n\nHow would you advise me to phrase my advice to her? Again, sorry for my bad english =/", "summary": "I want to tell her that she should be careful when drinking with people she do not know and trust, but I do not want to promote rape culture or terrify her"}
{"id": "t3_2fwpyu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should my BF [26/M] have stood up for me [25/F] against his friends?", "post": "Back story: My bf (26/M) and I (25/F) have been together off and on for almost two years now. The reason for the break was because I left to go teach for a year abroad and to kind of find myself. I'm back now and we got back together. \n\n**UPDATED BACKSTORY** - The break up wasn't me breaking up with him to go abroad. We had talked about me going, staying together for the process, and having him come over on a visa for the last two months to stay with me. Three months into my journey **HE** dumped **ME**. Not the other way around. This was a job opportunity trip that helped me in my field of profession. I didn't cheat on him nor did I talk/sleep with someone after the break up. I focused on my job.\n\nLast night while out with my guy (26/M) at a bar we ran into some of his old coworkers. After some chatting the coworkers realized that I was the girl who left the country. They proceed to tell my BF, in front of me, that he should dump me, asked him why he was with me, told him I was a bitch and that I'll probably leave again. The straw that broke the camel's back for me was when one of them stated \"Well, at least she lost some weight while she was gone.\" \n\nMy guy, though definitely uncomfortable with the situation, failed to say anything or stick up for me. I was left trying to change the conversation onto anything else that I could. They were drunk so I can look past the remarks but I can't seem to shake the fact that my guy didn't say anything to them to try and make them stop. He did apologize for their remarks afterwards but the damage was done. I'm not looking for him to fight my battles but I was very disappointed in how he handled the situation. Should he have stood up for me or should that be something I should do for myself when it comes to his friends and coworkers?", "summary": "BF's friends talked shit about me in front of my boyfriend and he didn't do anything. Should I be mad?"}
{"id": "t3_3qb7ao", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by sending Amazon a pic.", "post": "This actually happened this weekend and I've been thinking about whether or not I should share this with the world but here I go.\n\nI was taking a shit in my bathroom naked when I decided to check some emails on my phone. I had emailed Amazon the previous day to return some hair wax that I bought (the product I received wasn't the one that was displayed on Amazon)\n\nThe email from Amazon stated that in order to proceed with the return, I would have to take a picture of the wax and send it to them. No biggy! I thought and proceeded to finish taking my shit. After I wiped until white, I stood up and picked up the small container of hair wax and took a picture. I sent it to Amazon and went about my day. About a few hours later I receive an email from Amazon and I open it up and it stated:\n\nChoongsam,\n\nWe have reported your message with the picture to Amazon since you sent an inappropriate picture. We are going to close your return request and not authorize it.\n\nTLSS\n\nObviously, I was confused and had to recheck the image and lo and behold, I sent amazon a picture of the hair wax alright but at the bottom of the picture was my dick and balls.", "summary": "Amazon asked me for a picture of an item I wanted to return and I sent them a picture of my dick and balls. Definitely not getting my $20 back"}
{"id": "t3_1jq27b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21m] am nervous about my gf [19f] meeting up with a guy from her hometown.", "post": "Hey guys, been in relationship for half a year with my lovely girl. This is my first relationship so I want to know how to deal with this situation.\n\nA while back I was using her phone and she got a message on her social media website (she knows I know about it, but not that I actually found her profile). A guy she doesnt really know (loose acquaintance she put it) measages her Saying Hes coming to our town. She's from Russia so it's in Russian and she writes blogs on it so I like to read what she says. \n\nSo what he said was that he was going to surprise her with the date he was coming (I later found out using google translate). She made it seem like to me that she didn't really want to hang out with him since he's not even close to her, just a friend of a friend.\n\nWell I looked at her profile (it's public) and found out she commented on his photo being at the airport \"so ambiguous.\" So she messaged him as soon as he got to our city. I got curious and read it. I'm feeling insecure.\n\nShe doesn't know that I know. The guy is a single guy here and my gf is very pretty. I trust her, but this makes me VERY nervous even though I'm trying to rationally tell myself that it's ok.\n\nBut I can't get over that she really wants to meet up with someone she's not close to.", "summary": "girlfriend meeting up with an acquaintance from her hometown and I'm not sure whether or not I should be extremely nervous. I am extremely nervous."}
{"id": "t3_kn6rv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Has anyone had a problem canceling a Netflix account?", "post": "I signed up for a free trial month of Netflix this past June. About three weeks in I decided I didn't really need it for a host of reasons I won't bother getting into here. I canceled my account and Netflix.ca was asking me to re-activate when I logged in, indicating I was successfully canceled. That was that. \n\nFast forward to August, and I notice a payment on my credit card to Netflix for about 8 bucks in July, one month after clearly canceling the free trial. I called them and was reassured that there was some sort of clerical error, and that the matter would be resolved in the next few days. The guy on the phone said I would be contacted with a resolution to the monthly charge, and promised me that I would see no further charges. The only contact I had since was an email asking me to re-open my account, which I obviously didn't want to do. I never did hear about a refund, but life being busy and all I just let it slide.\n\nFast forward again to today when I see yet another Netflix charge on my credit card for August. Another (angrier) phone call and this time was refunded the charge from July on the spot (so she said, have yet to verify) and told that they have no record of me being charged in August. Despite my explaining that I had the bill *in my hand*, she had nothing on her end. I was once again reassured that my account was closed.\n\nI ended up calling my credit card people to get refunded the payment in August, and to prevent any further charges from Netflix. All in all I am far from impressed, and Netflix looks pretty shifty from my point of view. I certainly can't recommend them as a trustworthy company at any rate. Has anyone else experienced this kind of bullshit with them? I feel like I've been scammed.", "summary": "Tried free month of Netflix several months ago, and got charged for it over several months despite closing my account online and over the phone. Netflix has left me feeling scammed. Has anyone else experienced this?"}
{"id": "t3_4600gr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should my husband[33M] and I[23F],married 3 years, have lunch with my former best friend[24F,we were friends for 7 years, haven't spoken in 4 years] who thinks he's a racist?", "post": "My former best friend[24F], Marie has never met my husband[33M]. When he and I started dating she wanted to see a picture of him,when I showed her one she immediately proclaimed him a racist and psycho. Eventually we stopped speak and haven't for 4 years.\n\nShe contacted me last weekend, she wants to go to lunch together and meet my husband. He says he'll go if I want him to.\n\nI don't know if we should meet her for lunch. I miss her sometimes, we were friends for 7 years. But I don't want her freaking out on us.\n\nShould we meet her for lunch or not?", "summary": "I haven't spoken to my former best friend in 4 years, she wants meet my husband who she labeled as a racist without meeting him. Should we go for lunch or not?"}
{"id": "t3_2nayck", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "25F eloped with my now husband 26M and he won't tell his family or most of his friends", "post": "I've been bothered all week about the fact that my now husband and I eloped over a month ago and he still hasn't told most of his friends and family. I talked to my husband about how this made me feel last weekend and he was very apologetic. He told me that he thought I wanted to keep it a secret but now that he heard how I felt, he claimed he would tell everyone. Since then he has told one friend. He told me that his friend was upset and that she felt hurt. I became so angry at her selfishness and I wonder if it's the reason that he hasn't told anyone else. He claims that he thinks most of his friends will be hurt. I now feel like I'm having to prepare to justify and defend my marriage. This time that should be happy and exciting for us has been turned into a guilt ridden, stressful situation that just feels downright negative. My husband is attempting to spare people's feelings, but in turn is hurting mine. I feel like his mistress instead of his wife. Has anyone else been through this?", "summary": "My now husband and I eloped over a month ago and he still hasn't told his family or most of his friends."}
{"id": "t3_52yigo", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [25/m] asked out a girl [24/f] last year but never managed to go out on a date. One year later its happening again", "post": "Hey guys, \n\nLast year I started talking to a girl that I knew via mutual friends and eventually bit the bullet and asked her out. She agreed to go on a date and she said she will let me know when she's available to meet. She never got back to me about the time but she ended up telling me that she cant make it to the date. Instead she offered to go for coffee in uni the next day.\nUnfortunately, we met for coffee on campus, so it was close to impossible to have a decent conversation without a friend interrupting and joining us.\n\nFast forward a few weeks, exams piled up and we were both busy and so the conversations died down. I found some time to go and see her. I told her that if she wasn't interested, there was nothing wrong in saying so. To which, she said she IS interested but she was just busy a lot with studying. I was kind of annoyed at this and so I told her that she should choose a time and place for the next time we should go out and left to do the rest of my exams.\n\nAs the exams went on and the rest of the year went on, we talked less and less and we never ended up going out again. However, during the summer we started talking again because our birthdays were around then.\n\nWe came back to uni last week and I asked her if she wanted to meet up for coffee during the week and she said she wanted to. She said she would let me know the time to meet her. The day before we were supposed to meet up i bump into her and she told me that she would tell me the time to meet up. Surprise surprise, she never did, but in the morning we were supposed to meet up she messaged me to say that she forgot to tell me that she was busy with lessons and so she couldn't come out.\n\nNow I'm sat here writing and re writing this post because I don't know what to do or how to deal with it. \n\nWould appreciate any advice!", "summary": "Girl shows signs of interest last year  but never manages to make it to dates, when I tell her that she can say no to dating me, she says that she is still interested. Now its happening again"}
{"id": "t3_t3wd6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "This morning I had a vivid dream I was inside of Junior Seau's house. I just found out he was found dead. I'm freaking out a bit, do I have powers?", "post": "So, I had a fucking weird dream last night where I was in Junior's house with my mom as she was thinking about buying it. I remember being in his garage looking at some of his weight equipment and jeep lights on a shelf. My mom had like a giant yellow convertible 60's car...like a galaxy or something...that is completely irrelevant. I then had to operate as a spy for some organization in the backyard and make it to the 3rd floor of this building (also in the backyard) of his house. The facility reminded me of the MenInBlack...None of this matters and is all irrelevant...I woke up and told my girlfriend about the weird dream. Then a few hours later around 10am at work I told my office mate and co-worker that I had a weird dream about Junior Seau as well. He even commented at the time \"Who the fuck dreams about Junior Seau?\" well..bam 4pm I click on Yahoo and He's found dead. So obviously i'm freaked out a bit. I just called my girlfriend who also thinks it's weird as shit... The only thing I can think of is... my cousin lives in SanDiego and we've been emailing one another the last couple of days about what he plans on doing on an upcoming trip to NewOrleans. That's it. My cousin lives in San Diego and somehow I've subconsciously had a dream about Junior Seau for no reason at all. I live in Clearwater,FL.", "summary": "I had a dream about Junior last night; told my coworker and girlfriend about it this morning and they are equally as freaked out as me."}
{"id": "t3_106wu5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend [30] introduced me [31f] to his female friend [31], we really hit it off, and are now good friends, then yesterday I found out they used to date.", "post": "I have been dating this guy for about three months.  Last month I went to his buddies [M] house and the three of us were hanging out when their friend [F] showed up crying and upset.  I talked to her about things and we really hit it off, and I was super happy to make a new friend as well as get along with my BF's friends.  I have texted with her and hung out with her, and I genuinely feel she is a real friend.  \n\nThen yesterday my friend since childhood [30F] came over and we were celebrating the end of a string of long shifts at work.  We were pretty drunk.  So my BF and the female friend came over, started drinking too.  My childhood friend asked new female friend if her and my BF went to school together, or how they met, just making drunk meeting new people conversation.  They neither one will say, until finally they admit they used to date.  \n\nMy problem is figuring out how to be grown up about this.  I don't distrust either of them, I have no thoughts whatsoever that they are going to hook back up... I just don't like it and can't sift through my feelings to find the actual reason why I'm so upset about this.  At this point I just don't want to see or hang out with either of them.", "summary": "Boyfriend introduces me to gal pal.  I become friends also.  Find out they're exs.  Now feel shit city over the whole thing."}
{"id": "t3_xrauk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why are we so interested in Mars or space in general?", "post": "The funding behind a lot of thinks is pretty straightforward, in my opinion.  Most biological and chemical research can be tied to understanding/curing/treating a disease or something about alternative energy.  That's what people pay for, that's what people want, that's what people need, so scientists do it. \n\nMost engineering is done for a few purposes: Defense. Commercial computing. Industrial manufacturing and things like...cars. Things we sell, things we make to make things we sell, and things to \"protect us\" or w/e.\n\nAnyway, why do we want to go to Mars? To determine the climate and surface radiation to plan for a human mission to Mars? - why would we want a human mission to Mars?\n\nTo see if Mars was at any point habitable - Why do we need to know that? Why would we spend billions of dollars and countless hours of work to determine that?  \n\nIt's an incredible feat, and space has always fascinated me, but what motivates these studies?", "summary": "Why spend this much money on space? What is it we need to know so badly?  How will this help us?"}
{"id": "t3_2e263w", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "She[18/f] isn't my girlfriend( I am [19/m] ). She came back from a year studying abroad in Taiwan. She made a boyfriend over there. They are in LDR, yet she's having sex with me. Honestly, I don't know how I feel", "post": "I don't like the girl, let me say right off the bat. She is a very dear friend of mine, though. Before she left, we were hanging out often. We eventually began to fool around. Now that she's back, she tells me she made a boyfriend. Cool. I respect that. I won't make any sexual advances. Yet, she made the initial sexual advance. At first I was hesitant because she told me no sex. But I decided to go with it. First time, she felt awful for cheating, ruined the night. We go at it again soon, and several times. She doesn't feel bad, though. She even admits what she is doing is 'heartless'\n\nSo I found out she only knew the guy for the last 2 months abroad and yet she says she loves him and wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. So I'm thinking, \"really? Why are you cheating on him?\" I just don't know what to make out of this.", "summary": "Girl I fooled around with left for a year abroad. She made a boyfriend(2 months together). She's back and we're having sex."}
{"id": "t3_o2wto", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Fannie Mae now owns my (new) mortgage. Do I have any options?", "post": "I just bought a house two months ago, got a phenomenal loan (15 year 3.75%) through USAA, and figured all was well. Reading through the mortgage terms, I knew there was a possibility that my  mortgage could be sold to Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac, but was told by a representative that as my credit was impeccable and my loan terms were so good, it probably wouldn't happen - regrettably, I didn't record that or get it in writing. \n\nMy question is, is there anything that I can do to get my money away from Fannie Mae? I realize that USAA will still service the loan and nothing will change, I just don't like the idea of my mortgage supporting Fannie Mae. \n\nCalled the bank, was told that there was no change in the loan, as USAA was still servicing it. After emphasizing how much I didn't like Fannie Mae, I was placed on hold while the customer service rep talked to her supervisor, and was told that there was absolutely nothing USAA could do, and even if we refinanced it would probably happen again. Emphasizing again that as the loan was serviced by USAA nothing would change from my end, she politely told me not to worry about it anymore.\n\nSo now I ask you, reddit, is there anything I can do without giving up my rather fantastic loan?", "summary": "Fannie Mae bought my mortgage, USAA says nothing to be done. Asking reddit if, in fact, something can be done."}
{"id": "t3_37gakq", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Soon to be homeless needs advice in Texas.", "post": "I screwed up by quitting my job without having a backup. First off, I felt it was a little unethical to work while knowing that I would leave soon. I'm in sales so the ROI on employees is a little further out than is typical in other industries.\nI was literally the last person left. My bosses, engineers, and fellow employees quit all as soon as I started. I was with the company for less than a year and didn't want to burn time on a shit company. I was definitely misled into taking the position.\nSeveral of the people I worked with assured me 100% that I could get on at their companies, but none have come through. That's why I'm in this situation.\nNot eligible for any unemployment.\nSo.. onto the question:\nFor those in Texas, particularly Austin, how / where can I get help (aside from begging) to pay rent / bills until I can get a new job.\nI'm about a week away from being evicted (not a notice, but the kind where the cops kick you out) and have literally negative 60 dollars in the bank.\nI have nothing really of value to sell and expect my situation to be temporary.", "summary": "I quit my job without a backup plan. Week from homelessness. How do I get help to pay rent while I find a new job."}
{"id": "t3_359t62", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23] with my best friend [20F] of over 1.5 years. I have a crush on her and told her I need space", "post": "I hung out with her all day everyday and eventually developed a crush on her.She's been single for about 4 months and has always had the same bf prior. It slowly happened and I tried to prevent it but I can't anymore. I knew I never had a chance and she didn't feel the same way so I told her I needed some space because I started having a crush. She's mad at me because she thinks I was just being friends with her to get to date her which isn't true. She also has no friends in the area except me. \n\nShe can't accept that I need to change our friendship or understand how it hurts me to hang out with her so much. She was very depressed before I told her all this. I really want to be friends but she won't accept that I can only friends with her and not best friends. She's tried to get me to hang out multiple times since and I have to keep turning her down for my own health. I feel like shit and I'm worried about her harming herself.", "summary": "Female best friend can't accept that I have to not be close with her for my own mental health. She's a wreck. How do I get her to accept this with as little damage as possible?"}
{"id": "t3_ebyhb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I teach Japanese swordsmanship and no one cares...", "post": "... and, on the whole, that is in no way problematic for me. I wager a great deal of people here fall under this distinction. \n\nHOWEVER, not owning a school and being forced to sneak-teach (not nearly as suggestive as it sounds) in public parks or sign into a contract deal at a local community center (which I am currently doing) teaching with the very, VERY few students I have is heavy in cost both in time and in money. At this point in time, I am losing money to the community center. 100% of what I take in from student/s covers 60% of the center's monthly fee.\n\nEasy problem to understand. Need to teach indoors due to high chances of inclement weather. Roof cost money. Money comes from Students. Have 1 solid student. No money :C\n\nThe solution is a bit more complicated. It's hard enough generating interest in the martial arts let alone a SWORD art. It's nigh impossible to get someone to understand the benefit of studying swordsmanship when many, many people have already decided ahead of time that they will NOT understand anything you try to tell them because \"I'll just buy a gun OLOLOLOLOLOL!\". It takes a very specific kind of person to earnestly study swordsmanship (I'm gonna say that studying consistently for longer than a year qualifies you as \"earnest\") and finding them is wickid hah'd. \n\nI've tried all of the low cost methods of advertising I could think of which, admittedly, is not many (dropping fliers around, craigslist ads, you know, free things). NOW I am beginning to wonder if a more... I hate to call it \"professional\" considering the many flavors of ads I've seen... let's say \"cost intensive\" approach might be better. Does anyone have any suggestions/ideas/thoughts on how best to approach attracting more students? Totally open to suggestions more abstract than \"place an ad in the paper\". The best ways are probably the simplest but I thought I'd swing by and ask while I was here :D", "summary": "I teach swordsmanship, I have nearly zero students, I'm bleeding money and I suck at marketing myself. How can I continue to teach and attract EARNEST students? Ideas?"}
{"id": "t3_3s2zdq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by eating cauliflower", "post": "I'll try to keep it short and sweet. Nobody's gonna read this anyways, but I felt like I was dying.\n\nPretty much today I ran about 8.75 miles for the first time(I've only run 3 miles prior). I got home and drank about 4 glasses of water. 30 minutes later I ate fried egg, two sausages, and a fuck ton of cauliflower(substitute for rice or quinoa). 15 minutes later I felt my abdomen bloating up, as if someone was pumping air into me. For the next 30 minutes I kept burping because it relieved the feeling, but the gas just kept coming. I honestly didn't think it was serious until my face and ears started feeling numb, and I started feeling lightheaded. I thought I was gonna die. I was trying to work on a paper, but I couldn't think. I couldn't sit. So I started walking around the house burping. Thankfully, after vomiting, I just let it pass and felt better. I almost went to the ER, but good thing I didn't because that would be another embarrassing fuck up in itself. Even now, I still don't know if it was actually the cauliflower or not because it's so hard to believe a vegetable could do such a thing.", "summary": "I ate a shit ton of cauliflower. Started bloating like crazy. Couldn't breathe. Almost went to ER for a lame-ass reason."}
{"id": "t3_2jn8fx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my co-worker [23 F] ~1month, hooked up - now she is hooking up with different employee.", "post": "I just started working at an office job where I am an IT contractor. A female got hired as a temp soonafter and we hooked up twice. Within the first week of her working there. Fast forward like two weeks and she is hooking up with a full time employee now. Kissing inside the building we work at and I found out by questioning them leaving together almost every day. What do I do? It's got me all fucked up in the head and I have to watch this happen on a daily basis?\nWho flips a switch like that so easily and says, \"WELL I THOUGHT YOU ONLY WANTED TO HOOK UP AND I REALIZED I WANTED A RELATIONSHIP.\" She didn't even give me the option or share her feelings with me - just jumped ship. I am so confused and really just need some guidance here on how to deal with this in a work environment. This is a small office of 30 people with HQ located in Seattle so it is very intimate space in which I cannot avoid anyone. Help?", "summary": "I hooked up with co-worker. Co-worker hooked up with someone else in office - am now fucked up in the head because I have to go into work every day and watch them interact."}
{"id": "t3_3aofyr", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me[31f], him [27m] just moved in together... I can't help but fee like he's completely lost interest.", "post": "We just moved to a big row house in a city. We both share the second floor and there are three more people living upstairs and downstairs as well. I do have my own room...Unfortunately everyone is really busy and people are rarely home. \n\nI've tried fun stuff for him...leaving notes, buying him some big purchases (i know, i know), having dinner ready, other surprises.Some sexy surprises too... a lot of the times he'd rather play computer games than have sex with me ( I know, I know... reddit gf/wife syndrome)but even more that that he's just too tired to talk or have sex even. \n\nHe used to be so romantic and cute. Obviously the honeymoon phase is over, but I feel he's not even trying. I've even expressed we could have an open relationship (just none of that junk would happen in the house)... and I've told him how I feel. He says he understands, tells me he loves me, but tit's a lot of talk and no action. He used to make me feel loved and spacial... I don't want to go though the motions. Is the chase over? Having just signed a year's lease makes is so much more complicated:-/", "summary": "we just moved in, afraid he's lost interest. I've tried loads of stuff.. don't know what to do..."}
{"id": "t3_wys9a", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [28/F] 98% sure I don't ever want kids, my live-in boyfriend [28/M] wants kids. Should we \"wait and see\"?", "post": "We're 28, living together for a year, together for almost two years now, known each other for several years. We love each other deeply and have no major issues. Marriage is often discussed.\n\n*My argument:* \nI do not ever want children, and unless something neurological drastically changes, I doubt that I will change my mind. I do not like children, do not want to spend money on them, and do not feel rewarded by the time I spend with them.\n\nI am considering getting my tubes tied at some point (in the next five years), and currently have an IUD.\n\n*His argument:* My boyfriend thinks that I will love children if they have my genes. I suspect he is right: if somehow someone forced me to have children, I would probably love it, because it is helpless and it needs someone to love it, and it is mine after all.\n\nBF says my life won't be ruined as he will be the SAHD, will make sure we have plenty of money socked away pregnancy.\n\n*My Offer:* I told him that before we turn 30, he has to spend a week caring for a child. And if he still wants a child, we will have another talk. It's possible my biological clock will somehow kick in, but it is unlikely.\n\n*His Offer:* BF says he will essentially be a single father if he has to, and raise the child by himself with a donated ovum/surrogate. But he doesn't want to leave me. This seems absurd to me, because if I am with him, I will be the secondary caregiver. His life will be different; he will presumably be a different person.\n\n\"We will work things out somehow,\" is his refrain. He doesn't want to think about how much of a dealbreaker this issue is.\n\n*Questions*: Is it time for us to break up, or do I really need to wait the extra two years? Is my BF's offer reasonable, or could it never work?\n\nI am very grateful for any responses, and if you need any more details, let me know.", "summary": "Boyfriend and I are at odds regarding having children. I am against, he is for. He has made a seemingly absurd offer. What should we do?"}
{"id": "t3_30ad0p", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Bank closed my checking account because I had $0 balance for two days. What to do now?", "post": "I am a single mom.  I get no child support and my job only pays me once a month, so as you can imagine it gets pretty tight towards the end of the month.  I am in the process of paying off credit cards and building savings (thanks to lurking on this sub).  Aside from my monthly bills, I contribute to a 529 plan for my daughter, term life insurance, and a retirement fund.  I budget for my expenses very carefully and usually only leave myself a little bit of wiggle room for incidentals and a little for entertainment.\n\nI had a couple of expenses that went through the other day that just so happened to leave me with exactly a $0 balance in my checking account.  I knew I didn't have anything else that should be hitting my bank until I get paid on the 1st so I figured I'd just let it ride and transfer money in should the need arise.  \n\nI had to write a check today for an unexpected expense and immediately went online to transfer money in to cover it, but my bank had closed my checking account!!  I was completely surprised!  They wouldn't let me do a transfer and claimed that I would have to go into a branch and make a cash deposit and told me that even then it could take 3 business days to open the account back up.\n\nIs this common practice?   I'm worried, of course, that the check is going to be returned.  I'm really upset and really just not sure what to do now.  I was with this bank (Nevada State Bank) when they were bought out a few years ago and I stuck with them through the transition and all of its inconveniences.  I'm thinking maybe its time to move to another bank that will suit my needs and situation better.  What do you think PF?  Can you recommend another bank?  Obligatory apology for the wall of text.  :)", "summary": "My bank closed my checking account after having a $0 balance for two days.  What to do now/Should I switch banks?"}
{"id": "t3_1iktox", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23M) have always found her (21F) to be the most beautiful girl", "post": "I'll start from the beginning.  I was 16 and my family went to a new church for a change, and on our first day there I saw her.  She was tall, fit, blonde hair, bluest eyes, amazing smile and the sweetest person.  Eventually I found out she was the pastor's daughter.  \n\nFast forward a little, we started attending the church regularly.  I was working in my church's nursery.  I've always been great with kids and loved taking care of them.  One day while working my boss said that we have a new volunteer.  It was her, \"Jane.\"  \n\nAt this point in my life, I was 16 years old, 5' 4\", looked 12, and weighed maybe 120lbs.  I had zero confidence.  So, given the fact that I thought I was pathetic and that she was this goddess I never asked her out.  I talked to her, but never made a move.  \n\nFast forward some more.  Our church now is a multi-site church.  This means we are the same church with multiple pastors in 2 different locations.  I have since been attending the new site because it is closer.  I went to school and graduated in Mechanical Engineering and have a fantastic job designing military aircraft components.  I am 5' 10\", 185lbs, athletic and very built and now know I'm actually quite attractive.  I've had 2 serious relationships since this time and dated a lot but I have always thought she was this incredible angel and that has never really gone away.  After switching to the new site (I was 18), I haven't seen her except when I see her tagged by mutual friends on facebook and good god (oh know I used the Lord's name in vain) does she look incredible.  \n\nI would love to go up to her and ask her out, but I don't know if I should make an attempt of some sort of contact first (i.e. facebook).  Would love some sort of insight.  Appreciate it!", "summary": "! - I've had a secret crush on this girl for about 7 years.  Lost contact about 5 years ago.  Want insight on how to approach."}
{"id": "t3_3cgvca", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31 M] with my new 'rebound' gf [33F] of one week.Don't know where to go from here.", "post": "I was previously in a 3 year relationship that ended (in May) due to many issues stemming from my exes emotional affairs, amongst other issues.  After breaking up I wanted to be on my own and clear my mind but found myself with too much free time and constantly rationalizing her behavior and wanting to go back. \n\nKnowing that was not a good idea I started going on dates, and hanging out with women to get my mind off her. I began seeing one of my coworkers and I really like her. We had been drinking and now wanting to make the mistakes I made early on in my previous relationship we had the \"exclusive\" conversation. She is beautiful and I really like her but I don't want to \"use\" her? If that makes sense. I am taking this really serious however I keep thinking that she's just a rebound and I'm a dick for using her.\n\nIts gotten to the point where I feel an incredible amount of guilt during sex, so much so that I go soft because I feel like such a shitty human being.\n\nAm I looking too much into it? Or am I really just using this woman?", "summary": "Recently broke up with ex of 3 years and immediately jumped into relationship with new woman and I'm not sure if I'm only using her or if its real."}
{"id": "t3_247gi5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do you keep conversations fresh and interesting when you spend so much time together? Me: [21M] Her: [23F]", "post": "The other day, I suggested we do dinner somewhere, and while my girlfriend agreed I detected some apprehension. When I asked her, she said it was because she doesn't like how she feels like we run out of stuff to talk about if there isn't anything else to do. During the week this is fine since we both have our individual lives going on and there's new things to talk about, but the weekends I guess can get a little quiet. When you've been together for over a year and you live together, seeing each other most every day, how do you manage to keep talk interesting? Especially with the summer coming up, we won't have classes to talk about.", "summary": "After over a year of being together, and spending so much time together, how do we keep conversations interesting when sometimes it feels like we've talked about everything already?"}
{"id": "t3_45sfh4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF [19] is frustrated with me because I [19] thinks the lack of sex is a big deal.", "post": "So usually me and my GF have sex about once a week sometimes twice, but mostly once, while i'd like it to be more often, i can live with once a week it's fine, because when we do have sex it's really great. But it's been over three weeks now, and i'm getting really frustrated. Every time i try to do anything while we are cuddling she just moves so she's not so accesable, e.g if we're spooning she'll move so she lays on her stomach instead. Even just if i try to grab her butt she'll get annoyed and tell me to stop in the most frustrated manner. It's getting to the point where i don't really feel like cuddling with her because i know i'll want to make a move, and i'll just get rejected, and sometimes it's just so much easier to be frustrated than to be rejected by your own GF.\n\nShe's noticed how frustrated i've been in the last couple of days, and i've explained that the lack of sex is a really big deal for me. She says she's been really tired in the las couple of weeks, and it's true she has been extremely tired going to bed an hour or two earlier than usual, and her usual is already earlier than me. I've tried to tell her to take nap when she gets home so we could spend more time in the evening, trying to give her a hint, but she always refuses.\n She doesn't get why it's such a big deal for me, and says that me being to frustrated makes her want sex even less.", "summary": "Girlfriend and i haven't had sex in a while and it really bothers me, it bothers her how frustrated i am."}
{"id": "t3_1ooi1o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[16 F] dumped by manipulative boyfriend of 2 yrs [16 M]. How do I stop being so bitter towards him?", "post": "So I dated this guy. And he was great while we dated: funny, smart, caring, ect. but he has always been the ass-kissing attention whore type. He dumped me because the relationship had gone bad and I tried to move on, but every time he saw me get close, he would do something to keep me (hook up with me, apologize, tell me how great I am, you get the gist). \n\nEssentially, I was manipulated a lot by him and even though I don't love or want him anymore, I can't seem to move on. He has turned many of our mutual friends (that he was always closer to) against me and I'm just so bitter about the whole situation. Every time I get close to forgiving him, I'll be undermined by my anger at being alone without all the emotional support and friends I had before the breakup. Please help I just really want to move on with my life but it's hard because it's high school and he's EVERYWHERE.", "summary": "ex and I had a messy breakup. He manipulated our friends into thinking I'm a crazy bitch. Now I'm sort of outcasted by my close friends and I feel bitter. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_1nmwy5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] Met and amazing girl[19F], She lives in another state.", "post": "I met her this summer working at a summer camp.  I'm a pretty calm and honestly pretty shy guy.  Somehow by the grace of God she asked me and a couple friends to help her feed the horses (she was the horseback director).\n\nI had a HUGE crush on her for the remainder of the summer.  I don't think crush accurately describes what I feel for her.  I've had crushes but I can only describe this as finding my soul mate.  I was diagnosed with depression a couple years back, and no amount of therapy or pills made me feel the way she did.  She makes me want to get rid of everything I like and replace it with what she likes just so I can be with her.\n\n  I spent every afternoon this summer helping her feed. After the first couple of days the others didn't want to go out everyday to help, but I had my motive. I started to have some anxiety problems the days we couldn't feed together, and I pretty much stopped eating for just about 2 weeks and lost about 30lbs. I was under the impression that she had a boyfriend, and honestly I'm still not sure if she did, but she definitely doesn't now.  \n\nAnyway the summer ended and now we snapchat and text from time to time, usually with only a 2 day break of not hearing from her.  She gives me short answers for the most part which kind of hurts, but then she'll go and post something random on my facebook wall to get my attention.  Sometimes she doesn't respond to what I send and it really, really hurts.  I'm so confused.\n\nShould I keep texting/snapchatting her and get no response?  Should I wait for her to message me first? How do I get to know her better when she lives in another state?", "summary": "Met a cute girl, we hung out a lot, I went back to my state, she's in hers, how do I get to know her better?"}
{"id": "t3_4ltdg7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] got in a fight with my closest [20 F] friend, she stopped talking to me and don't want to make things worse", "post": "Hi!\n\nWall of text incoming.\n\nAs the title says, I got earlier today in a fight with one of my best and closest friends, lets call her Julie. Julie and I have been friends for several months, being really close to each other and talking about everything almost everyday.\nAs all friends we use some humour and memes and the like to keep laughing a lot of the time. She suffers from depression and anxiety so I try to keep her distracted as much as possible, sometimes she is a bit angry or distant and I know that I should keep my distance.\nWe had arguments before, mostly because one of us says something and it's missinterpreted by the other one, leading to discussions but usually settle down by talking about it.\n\nHowever today was the exception, we were talking as usual and we started talking about gold diggers in relationships (because of a meme), and she said something like \"I'm going to get rich and pay a man to be with me\" and we laughed at it, she suggested an actor for what she said \"He wouldn't even notice me, he only likes supermodels\" so I said, as a joke of course, \"Use your money to get a dream body and then he'll have no choice\". I thought we were joking so didn't make a deal out of it, however she did. She replied \"That hurts! I don't want to be your friend anymore, if you think I'm a gold digger, you are wrong!\" and she proceeded to block me everywhere. I sent her an old-school sms trying to apologize but got no response. I was thinking on calling her, but don't know if that's a good idea. Do you think there's still hope for saving the friendship? or shall I assume I've lost her?", "summary": "Made a comment thinking we were joking, friend took it too serious, doesn't want to be my friend anymore, don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_3a8yn2", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to be a good roommate.", "post": "This is going to be short and sweet.\n\nI am currently renting a room in a house with 3 other roommates, we get along great and have a lot of respect for each other. The floors in my house are very creaky and noisy, also the doors make a lot of noise when being opened so whenever possible I try to avoid leaving my room during very late hours. I am a very creative mind so I spend a lot of time awake during wee hours so it can be difficult. \n\nIt's really late one night and I need to use the bathroom, pretty simple...but tonight I was feeling extra courteous, courageous and confident and decided to urinate inside of a water bottle in order to 1) not awaken my roommates and 2) fulfill my lifelong dream of urinating in a bottle.\n\nThis didn't go over as smoothly as I thought it would...the circumference of the water bottle was no where near big enough for me to ahem...properly utilize. I ended up urinating on my bedroom floor, and in efforts to reverse my FU ran to the bathroom successfully awakening my roommates and relieving myself.", "summary": "tried to take a piss at 3 am and didn't go over too well. Long story short...they need to make bigger water bottles."}
{"id": "t3_1tq2qb", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Guest list nightmare", "post": "I have been engaged for a year and started off planning a medium wedding with 75 people. We had to move the wedding up by 4 months as of last October thanks to Obama care (that or pay a $300 fine). We also are passing for the bulk of things ourselves as no one offered to help us, and realized that to keep the list that size was at least $3000 more than we could manage. We cut the list down to 35, essentially immediate family and wedding party plus those helping us. due to family drama we bumped it up to 50 which still worked as that is how much our catering package and venue hold (max). Things were finally coming together and I was feeling good about getting this done.   I am exactly a month away from the wedding, invites have all been received, and now my mom decided that my list is still to small and she will pay for extra catering and cake and whatever else we need to double our guest list. My max is 50, to do that, I would have to completely start over in planning, again and I only have a month and would essentially have to contact everyone and tell them to throw away the invite they just got and replace it with whatever we figure out. I would need a new venue, New church, possibly new time and catering.  I don't even know who would be invited! \nI just don't know what to do!", "summary": "Mom wants to pay for me to double my guest list a month away from my wedding which will make me have to start planning all over and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_fbdfv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How hard would it be to move to Canada?", "post": "BACKGROUND: I'm a student studying History in the UK. Like many others, I'm doing a degree which won't benefit me much in the next ten years; I'm going to be up to my elbows in debt and have no desire to get an office job in order to pay it back. In fact, university for me has just been a formality that I'll be glad to see the back of; my parents wanted me to go, so I went; this is the last thing I have to do before I can start living my own life.\n\nHow hard would it be to move to Canada (after I finish my degree) and start living a life there? I chose Canada because, well, honestly it's because of the Cannabis culture over there. I'm a writer and I feel like I'd have something cool to write about over there; I'd love to become part of the legalisation movement, become a grower, whatever: I just want an adventure! California is also a viable option.\n\nI realise that this is a bit of a crazy pipe dream, but seriously I'd like to know how possible this is. Will my debt make it harder to get a VISA? Is there any work over in Canada? Would I be better off moving somewhere else? Are there any skills I should be developing? Am I just a naive idiot who doesn't stand a chance? Should I just go and work in I.T. or diplomacy like my parents want me to?\n\nI'd appreciate any advice you can give me.", "summary": "English student wants to become part of the Cannabis legalisation movement in Canada/California/Colorado/anywhere! Doesn't want to grow up to be a boring guy in a suit. Looking for advice."}
{"id": "t3_1yv04g", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Hey /r/Travel-- I'm looking to travel to Birmingham, AL for the Summer and I have some questions?", "post": "I apologize if I seem like I'm 'trolling' in comparison to the rules (they're quite intimidating and I hope you understand it's my first time posting here!) But I'm a guy in high school who's looking to see his dad one more time before I graduate, and if the situation becomes worse, he becomes terminally ill. I'm not here to give a whole life story, but the basis behind my travel, simply put;\nMy dad is sick and has previously had his appendix removed, now turning 59. He recently went to the Emergency Room due to heart problems in the middle to the night. He's a melodramatic turd sometimes, but my fear of his passing has been pounding my mind quietly.\n\nI am NOT an 'adult' in legal terms. I am sixteen years old and live in Seattle, Washington. I am looking for the cheapest way to get down there, departing at any time through 6/25/2014 & 8/17/2014 (Although it'd be nice to be with him during the 4th of July to see Thunder on the Mountain like we'd always would.) \n\nI've debated with my parents about Amtrak or Greyhound, and unfortunately with Amtrak the rates add up to be 600$. As for Greyhound after a few clicks, I'm surprised to see the rate being so cheap for the 'advance purchases', a possible estimate of 300$ round trip. Granted, no matter what the cost my parents will likely have an issue with me taking the bus.\n\nI usually fly Southwest Airlines, but after I while I've gotten my parents to allow me to start browsing prices for other airlines.", "summary": "Dad's sick, what's the cheapest round trip during the summer during the summer months? (Preferrably airline)"}
{"id": "t3_io2aj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Does driving like a dick make you a bad driver?", "post": "So I was thinking today, I'm a good driver (over 1 million miles with no accidents), but I'm a total dick on the road.\n\n I gear down instead of hitting my brakes, so it comes off like I'm riding your ass but I'm just trying to save energy. On the other hand, I do ride close if someone is going excessively slow or not merging.\n\n I drive faster than the speed limit almost all the time, despite over 30 tickets for various minor traffic offenses. \n\nI slalom through traffic, if I deem it to be safe. But I do not sit in my lane waiting to merge, I do not sit behind a slow driver. \n\nI honk at pedestrians if I have the green light and they try to cross, and I don't yield for them. It's MY green light.\n\nI flash my high beams when someone is going slow in the left lane, to tell them to let me pass. \n\nI overtake cars on double yellow line roads (legal in my state). The most cars I've ever passed at one time on a 2 lane road is 6 (never felt unsafe for a second).\n\nBasically, as I said before, I'm just an aggressive driver. \n\nHaving said that, my car has a braking difference that's half of most production cars, 300 horsepower and 300 ft/lbs of torque, so I can overtake quickly. \n\nSo am I a bad driver? Or just a total dick.", "summary": "I drive like a dick, however my experience shows I'm a safe driver. Despite my experience, am I still a bad driver since I drive like a dick?"}
{"id": "t3_12a7za", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My best friend is in a terrible relationship and I don't know how to get her to see it.", "post": "So I don't know it this is my place, but it's worth a shot if I can get some advice on what to tell this girl. \n\nI(18f), have a friend(17f), who is dating an awful guy(22m), and she doesn't seem to see it. She has been seeing this guy for about 10 months. He work on the rigs up north and goes away for 21 days and then is home for 7 days. For the past 10 months he's been telling her everytime he is at work that as soon as he gets home he is going to commit to her and they will be official boyfriend and girlfriend. Everytime this has been a lie to convince her to do something sexual with him For a couple months he even started to tell her as soon as he gets home he is going to propose to her, but once he got home he 'didn't have money to'. \n\nOver the amount of time they have been seeing eachother she has been on dating websites seeing and hooking up with other men. They had \"an honest discussion\" the other day, and he admitted to sleeping with mutiple women. Now I know that they weren't commited during this time but everyday he has told her he loves her and \"she's the perfect woman, etc.. Apparently now they're trying to work things out. How can I explain to her they will never be able to trust eachother? She insists on havig all this social network passwords and when he's at home she constantly had his phone. \n\nI just wish I could help this girl; her parents are basically non existent and let her do whatever she pleases, I feel like the only person she has to guide her is me. \n\nAlso... She has a 15 year old sister and this creep adds hers little sisters friends on Facebook and flirts with/ hits on them. He also gave her a disease, it was curable, but still.. Why aren't these things red flags to her?? Once again I know it's not my place but my heart just bleeds for her and I can't watch her get hurt constantly by this ass.", "summary": "Best friend is in a very unhealthy relationship, gets used for sex lied to, cheated on and he likes little girls... What can I say to help her understand this is an unhealthy relationship. "}
{"id": "t3_2y7oqx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my Romantic Interest/possible GF [34 F] of a few weeks, is it weird to tell her I miss her?", "post": "I met this girl a while back. We've been on a date every 2 days or so since we started seeing one another. Our relationship, which has yet to be defined, took a turn to physical intimacy lately. Now she's out of town for a few days, and we talk every day, but I miss her.\n\nWould it be strange to tell her I miss her, even though we've only been out about a dozen times? I don't want her to think I'm clingy, because I'm generally not, but I really do miss spending time with her. I try not to over think these things, but sometimes I can't help it.", "summary": "Dating a few weeks, but we've been physically intimate, is it too early to tell her I miss her after she's been gone for a week?"}
{"id": "t3_1j8rap", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I've been able to read conversations going back and forth between my married father and other women besides my mom about sleeping together, future meet ups, etc. No idea what to do", "post": "I suppose everyone will wonder how I'm able to view these texts. I'm not spying on him, (well, in a sense I'm not). My father and I have iPhones, and he logged into iMessage on my phone, and I guess that if he uses iMessage on his phone, if I'm logged into his account on my phone, I get all of his conversations. \n\nNow to the juicy part, for a lack of better terms. Over the past few days, I have read conversations of his to random number such as, and I quote, \"Wife is out of town. Wanna meet up? Name a price per hour.\" and also - \"Want to meet up? Missing you :( \". \n\nWhat scares me most about this is how sincere he sounds in the texts. Almost as if they have a semi-strong relationship, or as if they're somewhat dependent on each other. Fucking emoticons? My parents have been married for around 20 years, and I won't sit here and say that there hasn't been any sleeping around/cheating on my fathers side of the marriage. I don't have a close enough relationship with my parents where I feel I could talk to either of them about this. \n\nI also don't believe that I have a right to be reading theses conversations, whether he's my father or not. I was considering just logging out, and deleting all the conversations, but I'm not sure. My parents and I don't have the most personal relationships, and my childhood has always consisted of a one way relationship with them. They express their opinions to me, show me love, treat we decent(ish), and I listen, say yes sir and yes mam and move on. \n\nI have no idea what to do, and if anyone wants to know, there are about 10 conversations going on throughout the week.", "summary": "My dad may be cheating on my wife, and I can view his conversations with these people. Don't know what to do. "}
{"id": "t3_mcq7f", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Getting ready to move and purging some clothes I never wear. If there are any unemployed redditors out there who could use a couple of nice dress shirts for their job hunt, let me know vie msg and I will drop some in the mail. [x-post]", "post": "I posted to a few subreddits on the advice of a friend. Forgive me if I did  it wrong.  \n  \nI have a bunch of Brooks Brothers and Brooks Brothers-like oxford shirts that I have barely worn. I would be happy to send a couple to job hunting redditors who can make use of them for interviews or whatever. I think probably just the United States because of shipping costs. I also have some sportcoats to get rid of. The shirts are size 16 - 4/5 Sportcoats are 38-42 Regular. Most of this stuff fit me when I was slightly heavier than I am now, around 5' 8\" and 185 lbs. Not a lot of items, but I'll invest in some USPS for people who could use them.", "summary": "Moving, and realized that I haven't worn anything but a t-shirt and jeans to work for over 10 years.  "}
{"id": "t3_1bx4k6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My best friend [19f] and her boyfriend [20m] are making my life [18f] much harder than it already is. I am in desperate need of advice.", "post": "I'll try to make this as short as possible. I live with my dad and am currently dealing with some issues (depression, anxiety, possible bipolar). I recently had to drop out of college because every day is a struggle. About two months ago, my best friend moved in with me because her mother would not allow the lifestyle she adopted thanks to her new boyfriend. Since there's a spare room here, my dad and I had no problem with her staying. \n\nShe's not around much (she stays out all night with her boyfriend) but she and him are here every morning until my dad gets home from work (my dad would not allow this, so they're sneaky about it). Now, I have a boyfriend myself, so I understand the rush and need for each other, blah blah. But my mental state is pretty screwed, so I absolutely cannot stand to hear them having sex every day. I want silence and peace. I am VERY irritable and it drives me insane to hear them fucking in her room right next to mine, in the shower, and just recently in the fucking kitchen. \n\nI also hate myself for feeling this way, because I know that they mean no harm. She only knows about my anxiety, but I've made it my mission to hide all of my other issues from her. Not sure why, it just makes me too nervous. She's lovely and she'd do anything for me, so I don't know how to tell her that I go crazy every day when they're here.  Please, any advice?? I just want some quiet time in my own damn room.", "summary": "I'm dealing with depression/anxiety, my best friend moved in with me and brings her boyfriend over every day, it drives me insane to her them have sex, want them out but I get too nervous to tell her."}
{"id": "t3_v9211", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "All my progress lost within 6 months of cheating on my diet and avoiding the gym. Life Re-do. Starting now.", "post": "Just need to get this out there:\n\nAs a 5'7\" F, I went from 190 to 155 during my relationship with my ex who was my workout partner and inspiration. He was the one to remind me to keep going to the gym and to turn my nose up to junk food. After our breakup, I quit going to our gym, stopped my marathon training and started drinking. A LOT. With the drinking came the greasy late-night binge eating and hangovers that deterred me from doing any sort of exercise. Within 6 months I gained it ALL back. Just 15lbs away from my goal, I fell all the way back down to rock-bottom. \n\nBack at square 1, today is the day I lace up and go for a run. Hopefully It won't take too long to get back into the swing of things. I don't need the ex, I can do this on my own.\n\nFor anybody out there in my position, there is no tomorrow. There is right now. Trash the potato chips and move your ass. Get ruthless.", "summary": "Diet/gym cheating is a slippery slope. Regained the 35lbs I lost and went back to couch potato status. Getting back on track today."}
{"id": "t3_4itol9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is this a reasonable thing to accept in a relationship?", "post": "I'm 24 and I've been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now. \n\nI've never probed him for information about his whereabouts, never go through his phone or personal things or anything like that. \n\nThat being said, he is incredibly secretive. He is constantly on his phone and if i even seem like I glance at it, he immediately turns it away so i cant see. or If i pick it up, he snatches it back from me and becomes accusatory like I'm not respecting his privacy. That has happened a few times and I've never demanded to look through it. \n\nFurthermore, he threw a fit about deleting his exes on facebook (this was a thing because he asked me to not speak to my exes, was adamant that its not acceptable in a relationship so i asked him for the same courtesy), and he brings up the \"sacrifice\" of it on an almost daily basis. \n\nToday, I asked about a past relationship of his. In response to this, he called me every name in the book, told me to \"shut the f%$# up and break up with him\", that his past is none of my business, etc...\nI fundamentally disagree and i think past relationships are relevant for a few reasons, primarily because \n\nthe people hes slept with could give ME stds, \n\nbecause he's lied to me about it in the past when we first started dating, \n\nbecause if he expects to sleep with me, i think its my right to know where he's been.  We also frequent a place where a lot of his prior flings hang out and its weird for me to be in the dark about their past relations\n\nand because simply put, why cant i know who he's been with? why the secrecy?\n\nHe tells me that in order to be in a relationship with him, i must agree to never ask questions about his past, never ask where he is, and never ask what hes doing. He thinks that's a sign of trust. I told him I will not agree to censor myself.", "summary": "what does reddit think? is it reasonable to ask someone to never question your present, and never ask about your past?"}
{"id": "t3_ux73v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "baby daddy wants to take mother to court so she won't be allowed to move away with her daughter.. any advice??", "post": "My Girlfriend has a 3 year old daughter with her ex fiance, I am in the Marine Corps and have been dating her since before I joined, her and I have been talking about getting married lately but with my career that will mean she will be moving around a little bit (possibly a lot).  at the moment, her ex fiance and her have no \"official\" custody arrangements for the child (other then both names being on the birth certificate). my girlfriend has a good job and works from home so she is always with her daughter, the dad takes the daughter every other night and every other weekend.  long story short, he doesn't like the idea of her moving out of state with their daughter, he is threatening to take her to court and request that she is not allowed to move out of a certain distance with her daughter, so that he can still be around her.  when she and I get married we were planning on her moving to california where my duty station is (she lives in Florida now)... \n\nBASICALLY, is she screwed? can he really force her to stay put with his daughter for the next 15 years, regardless of if she gets married or any other factors, according to her, even if this happens HE would still be free to move anywhere he wants with the daughter, whats up with that??... \n\nI don't know too much more info, nor do I know anything about custody, I just feel like she is being trapped, and I want to know if anyone has experience with this, or can give advice, or ANY help", "summary": "Girls baby daddy threatening to take mother to court so she won't be allowed to move away with her daughter for the next 15 years.  any advice??"}
{"id": "t3_rrebb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Ending Relationship with Live-in GF", "post": "I've been with my GF for about 16 months, she moved into my apartment about 6 months ago.  Things have slowly fizzled out (dead bedroom) and although we are very good friends, it has become clear to me that we're looking for different things in a romantic relationship.  \n\nShe works as a teacher, but next year will be enrolled in a master's program at a University in another state.  The plan has been for us both to move out of state in June when her school year is over.  I've recently decided that it is best for both of us to go our separate ways and I will not be moving with her.\n\nDilemma:  When do I break it to her? We live in my 1 bedroom apartment and share a bed.  I cannot expect her to move out and find a new place when she will be moving out of state 2 months.   I'm afraid the news will crush her.  I doubt we can continue to live together in a small space for 2 months, with one of us sleeping on the couch every night.   \n\nI know this will be hard and I know it needs to be done as soon as possible.  But I feel it would work out best (for her and me) to wait until about 2 or 3 weeks before she leaves to drop the hammer.  \n\nHas anyone gone through a similar situation?  Any advice is greatly appreciated!", "summary": "When is the best time to end things with live-in GF who needs a place to live for another 2 months? "}
{"id": "t3_w61h5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Reddit, what should I do? I am at a loss.", "post": "Ok, so here is the situation. I met this girl on facebook through a good friend of mine. She is awesome, to say the least. She enjoys the same things I do such as video games, making stupid ass jokes, and generally having a good time while not worrying what anyone else thinks. I've known her for about 2 months and we hang out about every other day. I like her a lot. The problem is she is \"talking\" to another guy that she met a few weeks before me. She comes over to my house when we do hang out and we watch movies on my bed (I'm 19 and live at home still) and laugh, occasionally wrestle and have a good time. The problem is the other guy. She texts him quite a bit, even when we are hanging out, but she won't text me when she hangs out with him. She will text me any other time, except when they are hanging. She knows that I like her. She knows that I think she is attractive, and I have made it very clear that I want to be friends over anything if an \"us\" doesn't happen. I want to date her, but I don't want to lose this good friendship either. I know I should just be patient and wait it out and see what happens between her and the other guy. She flirts with me every now and then when we are alone, which has gotten me really confused, and she makes teasing comments whenever I say she looks good tan and things like that such as \"so you think I'm cute? hehe\"\n I should just be patient with the whole thing right, and let what happens happens? What would you do in this situation?", "summary": "This girl I really like is talking to another guy, but not dating him. She flirts with me every now and then when we hang out. Should I be patient and wait, or go for it?"}
{"id": "t3_3ti78f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[16f] sister [19f] is horrible to live with and I need coping mechanisms til I can move out", "post": "Hi, this is my first post (throwaway obvs) and I'm on mobile so please excuse any spelling/grammar mistakes. \n\nMy sister is horrible to live with she acts like a spoiled 2 year old I have a scar on my wrist from where she dug into my skin when I wouldn't move fast enough out of bed. \n\nToday she screamed at me for wanting McDonalds and then when I gave up and went to make myself some nachos she called me a fat shit, a fucking bitch and then she hit me and threw a loaf of bread at my face.\n\nShe then walked into my room and stayed there during my rising in loudness pleas for her to get out stating that 'I'm not going to leave until you calm down' even though I was saying that the only way I would calm down is if she left.\n\nPlease do not think this is a one off and that I'm Justin's whining my mum says that this is just what siblings do, but this is an almost weekly occurrence since she turned 13.\n\nMy parents are divorced and she hates our dad. Our mum is working most of the time to help us to afford everything as my sister doesn't contribute to the household - whereas I do. \n\nI tell my mum what she does but then she just tells of my sister and then my sister gets worse when mum has to go back to work\n\nI just can't continue to deal with her in this way and I feel so bad because I don't love her when I know you are supposed to love your family til you die.\n\nPlease I would just like coping mechanisms to deal with her until I can move out", "summary": "My sister is horrible and mean and attacks me at every chance she gets - she won't move out and our parents just make things worse, how do I deal with her?"}
{"id": "t3_3u5n7o", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by playing with thumb tacks in my bed.", "post": "First post after lurking for a few years now. Figure I'll give being a real Redditor a try.\nSo this was actually when I was about 10 years old. It is one of those burried memories that you recall once every 3 years. So here it is:\n\nMy grandpa was visiting over Thanksgiving one year and being that we didn't have a spare bedroom it was routine that I, the youngest sibling, was relocated to the couch and my Grandpa would take over my room. The day before he arrived an intense G.I. Joe battle was in progress. The fight that particular day took place on the harsh terrain of my bed comforter. Finding a package of thumb tacks in the office supplies earlier that day was the true cause of war. See, I wasn't very imaginative as a kid, so the idea came without delay. Gunshots = holes. So, fast forward through what would be concerning to watch as an adult seeing this demon child practicing Voodoo. Two days later at breakfast after my grandfather has spent his first night, my dad comes into the kitchen. \"Morning, did you sleep okay?\". To which my grandfather replies quickly \"I did, until I rolled over on a thumb tack and it stuck me in the pecker\". Busted. No more access to office supplies for quite awhile after that.", "summary": "I played with thumb tacks in my bed. Grandpa took one to the pecker. (Not molestation related, grandfather is a great guy)"}
{"id": "t3_xh9b1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Jealous of one guy", "post": "Is it wrong that I'm jealous of this one guy my girlfriend talks to? She said how she was irritated by him and barely went online because of how much he buggered her. But now that we're dating she tells me of how theyve been talking and playing games together and shit. Am I being too worried and jealous over nothing? I'm 17, she's 16; relationship is barely one month long. A sidenote, but possibily related is that I have no idea why she would ever have considered me. She liked me, but I was not the ideal teen as I frequented weed, lsd, alcohol, sex and cigarrettes for the shits and giggles (I did not let them define me as a person), while she is a complete lilly as she did not do a single bad thing. I feel as if I don't want to ruin her innocence which might make my heart a little bit more tender.", "summary": "There is this one guy that my girlfriend said annoyed her, but she still talks to him and that kind of irks me."}
{"id": "t3_44cnxn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with [22 F] Dating window?", "post": "This girl I used to go to school with messaged me on Facebook asking if I remember her (I kind of do but we never talked in school). \n\nWe talked more and started flirting a little.\n\nThis has only been going on for about 3 days but I'm pretty socially inept so I don't know when I should ask for her number or when I should ask her out. \n\nI'm worried that there is a dating window and that it will close if I don't make a move.\n\nI'm also very self conscious about my body right now and I feel like she wouldn't like me if she saw me irl.", "summary": "I want to date this girl but I don't know when to ask for her number etc and I am very self conscious."}
{"id": "t3_ku6b4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "A question about human evolution.", "post": "Ok Reddit; You seem to know way more about science than me and I trust that a lot of you can answer this question to your own satisfaction but you may not manage to educate me if you assume that I have the same scientific education as you. My formal science education stopped 11 years ago when I was 16 years old. Since then it has been what I happened across and conversations with scientists. (I love learning through conversations). Please go slow explaining this...\n\nHere's my understanding of the principles of evolution theory;\n\nIf you live to make babies who live, well done your genes are passed on. If you don't, sad times mr, your genes are no longer contributing anything.\n\nIf a certain gene gives you an advantage over your competitors for a mate or for a dwelling or for surviving a winter etc then they will help you to survive and make a baby or two. This way the genes that are helpful slowly are preserved whilst the genes which do not help or even hinder slowly get weeded out. It's good it's logical and I'm happy. Until...\n\nI'm considering the final stages of human evolution; At some point we got quite ahead of the curve. We're much more intelligent and adaptable than our closest evolutionary relative right? We have developed technology like weapons and clothes. We can adapt much better. So at some point our competition stopped being with the other species I think and was only down to who got to sleep with yonder hottie and who survived that snow storm last winter. Perhaps it was also to do with fights over who get's to sleep in this part of the valley.\n\nMy point is. There's a huge amount of lovely inhabitable fertile world out there. Once we beat the apes even by 25% of the advantage we have over them now, why did we continue to evolve so far in advance of them? Our competition with fellow humans is surely not fierce enough? Only now are we really in a place where the population is unsustainable. Why would we have evolved before now?\n\nI apologise if this is long and meandering. I wish I knew the short hand for explaining these ideas.", "summary": "Oh man, how to succinctly ask? Why are humans so far in advance of other species? What was the evolutionary motivation or necessity after securing ourselves at the top of the pile?"}
{"id": "t3_2qrn0d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my [19 F] 1 year, just worked up the courage to finally end it", "post": "I finally worked up the courage to break up with my long time \n\ngirlfriend. We have been on and off for a good portion of three \n\nyears and she is the only person who I have ever had a real \n\nrelationship with. Recently she has been hanging out solely with her \n\nno life stoner friends and there influence had become evident. \n\nNothing that happened was her fault and she was taking no \n\nresponsibility for anything ie going to a rave instead of buying a \n\nnew laptop that she needs for school. \n\n    I had known it was not going to work out for the last few months \n\nbut recently she blew up at me for a minuscule thing that is \n\nsomewhat out of my control. \n\n  So today I finally sat down with her and ended it. It was difficult to \n\ndo and I'm not really sure how to move forward considering I have \n\nto see her weekly but I know this was the right decision. Thanks for \n\nletting me get this off my chest and taking the time to read.", "summary": "Broke up with my only real long-time girl friend because she needs to grow up, not really sure how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_2kypgo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [21F] going to be a student at the school my SO [28M] teaches at.", "post": "Yes, I know, giant age gap. I dropped out of school and have been working since 17. Met my boyfriend when I was 18 and moved in together a year later. \n\nI've decided that I wanted to go back to school because I've hit a wall in my career. I've been stuck doing retail and this is not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I've been freelancing doing acting and writing, but those are few and far between. I think going back to school will be something I really need. \n\nProblem is, my SO graduated from the same school 8 years ago, and now he is teaching there.  I would be quitting my job and reverting to student status while he works. That puts us at different life stages. I'm not sure how this will work. I've always been working, and I'm afraid that this may alter the dynamics of our relationship. \n\nAlso, people are going to talk about the professor who is dating and living with one of his students. We cannot keep this a secret because I've already met his friends and coworkers from school. They already know about our relationship. It's going to be weird. \n\nThere isn't any other school near us that I can afford. The school he teaches at is the best in the area and the only one that we can afford, so there really is no other option. \n\nAm I just worrying myself silly, or are these things inconsequential?", "summary": "My SO is teaching at the school I want to go to and I'm not sure if it will work. Plus it is weird."}
{"id": "t3_1o4281", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[m20/f19] so this girl invited me to a party, could use some advice", "post": "Ok so one month or two ago i met this girl in line for a night club. We hit it off so i ended up going home with her, and we had a good time (no sex).\n\nSo we've been talking a bit on facebook since. I also asked her out once and she said ok, but she ended up getting sick so that went down the drain. Cue some radio silence (took this a sign that she wasn't interested) and suddently a few days ago she asked if i wanted to come with her to this pre-party at her friends place this weekend.\n\nThis is good stuff i figured so i said yeah sure i'll come. And now i've been thinking. \n\nThe pre-party is at her friends place and i don't know anyone there. I also dont know this girl all too well either and it just hit me that this is probably not the best \"date\" scenario. Oh well, i'll be going anyway - i'd beat myself up if i didn't.\n\nAlso worth noting is i'm not the most outgoing person, but as the night progresses alcohol tends to smooth this over pretty fast.\n\nSo... how do i approach this situation in the best way possible? \nhow am i supposed to keep her entertained the entire evening?", "summary": "girl invited me to a party, barely know the girl and i know no one that will be there. i'm also somewhat introverted. Never been in this situation, could use some advice."}
{"id": "t3_1kptty", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I[22/M] quit my job because of my ex [20/F]?", "post": "I go to college and I work on the school paper. I get some money from it, which is why I called it my job, but I don't really need it. I met her while working there, and we're both supposed to go back to the paper next year to work on it for the school year then. The problem is that we just broke up a couple of weeks ago, and I don't feel like seeing her again. She dumped me, and for some strange reason, I really hate her right now, and I don't think I would be able to stand seeing her. The problem is I don't really have many friends outside of the people I know on the school paper. So if I left the newspaper because of her, I feel like I could be alienated by the others for quitting before the school year start. Do you think I should still quit though? Am I being immature for not wanting to see her and work with her for an entire year? \n\nWe were together for a year, by the way.", "summary": "Broke up with my girlfriend who works on the school paper. Now I don't want to see her again, but I might lose all of my friends. Help would be greatly appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_mnpzb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need some help, Reddit... Anxiety, emotionally abusive girlfriend who i love, etc...", "post": "So... I don't want to say this in a \"bragging\" kind of way in saying how awesome i am, but i feel like my girlfriend absolutely takes me for granted.\nI'll buy her things, tell her how amazing she is, tell her i love her, do everything in my power to treat her well, making everything perfectly comfortable for her, and all she gives me in return is either anger towards me, lack of approval or distance.\nShe broke up with me for about a week a few months ago, because i mentioned something off handed about her vicious, casual swearing, so she ignored me, told me not to touch her, pushed me away and didn't talk to me for the rest of the day. This was all the day after i found out from the doctors that my mum might have cancer. She broke up with me a couple of hours afterwards.\nBut the thing is, when our relationship is good... it's really really really good! And i absolutely love her with all my heart, and i know that she loves me with all her heart too.\n\nBut i've been away in another country for a little while now, and i've been feeling really lonely, (FYI, i get high anxiety, to the point of twitches, head banging on tables, and crying), and i told her this, saying that i was feeling so alone that i couldn't breathe and that i missed her so much. I sent her a wall of text in a message telling her how amazing she is and that i was freaking out about how lonely i feel all the time and that it was really getting to me and that i needed her guidance and all she messaged back with in return was \"it's alright, don't worry\". Those exact words, no more, no less. I asked her if my messages weren't coming through properly, and she just said \"yeah, they are, i dunno what to say though\" and then went offline (on skype)...\n\nI spent the rest of the night rocking back and forth, hyperventilating, hitting my head, trying desperately to not feel so alone, and she wasn't there for me...\n\nI'm also so frightened that she is going to change her mind about me when i get back from my trip...", "summary": "i have high anxiety, girlfriend doesn't acknowledge my feelings, doesn't care about me sometimes and takes me for granted when i do nice things for her. Also worried she may dump me when i get back from my long trip."}
{"id": "t3_q8xx7", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Open relationship advice", "post": "I am a bisexual female, 19, and my boyfriend is also 19 and straight. \nWe've been together for a year and a half.\nI love him very much and trust him completely and he feels the same about me. \nHe is totally fine with me hooking up with chicks, and I have, I tell him about it and share stories and he's all for it. In fact, he was even disappointed I didn't go home with the girl I made out with at the bar. Lol. So he's really cool.\nHe was virgin when he met me because he comes from a country where premarital sex is illegal (though he is an atheist). And I know he wants to have sex with other women, naturally. I told him I'm okay with it, for months I've been saying so, but though I DO admit when he first brought up the idea to me at the start of our relationship, I was very against it. But my mind has changed, like 6 months ago, but he still doesn't believe me. He feels upset because he is limited but he won't believe me that I'm fine with it even though I've explained it to him why I am. He is not okay with me being with men and I respect that. But how do I get him to believe me? He says he fears me being very upset afterwards and having a bitch-fit or demanding freedom to sleep with men. None of this is true. Advice?", "summary": "Boyfriend wants to sleep with other women. I say that's fine. But he fears I will be bitchy and full of regret afterwards. How do I convince him I'm actually fine with it?"}
{"id": "t3_3epwge", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure if I [20 M] should bring up exclusivity with my sorta LDR girlfriend [20 F] of a few months", "post": "Hello! I started the beginning of a relationship too late with a girl friend of mine, so we are doing a trial long distance \"thing.\" We've always prided ourselves on not needing a label and being flexible with each other. Especially with it being too long of a distance to be able to see each other often, we both thought it was wisest not to put any pressure to keep something afloat between us.\n\nHaving said that, the last time I visited I started thinking \"Why not?\" and have been starting to have major feelings for her. She did too, at least for the first few days after I visited, but like everything long distance, time and distance starts to numb the feelings a bit. \n\nWith my growing affection for this girl, I've noticed myself getting more jealous and insecure about what she's doing all the time. That isn't healthy to begin with, I know, but I find it hard to bring this up in conversation when we have never explicitly mentioned our rule about exclusivity. It would be unfair for me to ask her who she is with and what she is doing without having grounds to worry, if that makes any sense. I wouldn't mind being exclusive, but if she tells me she does not want it or wants to \"see what happens\" then I feel I might get hurt if or when she finally does find someone. I think I may be unintentionally exclusive from my end for someone who does not feel the same drive.", "summary": "Unsure of how best to bring up exclusivity with long-distance girl I have been seeing. Feel like I am down for being exclusive, but will be hurt if/when she does not agree."}
{"id": "t3_4h0l6o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "BF [27M] and I [28F] had a threesome on holiday with a guy [20s M]. He feels weird now.", "post": "Last week BF (of 2 years) and I were on a few days of holiday in another country and talked about having a threesome there. We've always been keen on trying that and this was a good opportunity since we could have just had it with someone and never meet them again.\n\nSo we went into a night club near our hotel and kind of found our guy. A cute early 20s guy. The three of us had some drinks together and we got to business after that. It was a lot of fun. We also had sex again in the middle of the night. The guy left early in the morning and it was us again. I thought we both enjoyed it as it certainly seemed like it that night. In the morning I told him that next time we will bring a girl and he was totally for it.\n\nSo today he told me that he's been thinking about that and he can't get the images that he saw out of his mind, the images of me giving another guy a blowjob and another guy having sex with me. He added that he also feels like he's not enough for me since that night I could handle two guys, and that he's generally not good enough in sex (that night he lasted long but the other guy lasted longer so there was a period when my boyfriend was watching the two of us keep going when he had just finished. During the middle of the night sex the same thing happened). I tried to the best of my abilities to reassure him that he's excellent in bed and I couldn't be more satisfied with him sexually but they all seemed to not make a difference.\n\nWe're both at work now and I want to make sure I say the right things tonight at home to make him feel better and help him overcome these feelings. Any suggestions?", "summary": "BF and I had threesome and we enjoyed it. Now BF feels like he is not sexually capable since the other guy lasted more than he did. How do I help him with his feelings?"}
{"id": "t3_1dxiji", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Do you think there should be higher penalties if you commit a crime by against a good Samaritan?", "post": "For example, \n1. pretending to be hurt and then pulling a knife to rob the person who comes to help. Or  \n2. there's a fight or someone is in trouble and the good Samaritan goes to help the victim but is also beaten up by the perp. \n\nIt feels like society is getting more suspicious and distrustful of one another. You often hear stories of passer-bys ignoring someone clearly in trouble simply because they don't want any trouble and/or are afraid. Personally as a tiny girl, I would like to help anyone who needs it but often have to think twice, just in case. I hate having to worry and second-guess if someone really is in trouble or out to hurt me.\n\nAlso, an interesting distinction between the two examples above:\nIn case 1) Intentionally baiting a good Samaritan Vs. in case 2 where you did not intend to bait the good Samaritan. Perhaps higher penalties should only be enforced in case 1?", "summary": "Do you think enforcing higher penalties for crimes against a good Samaritan, would decrease these types of crimes and therefore improve trust and encourage society's willingness to help one another?"}
{"id": "t3_2tcx3g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend(24f) and I (28m) have been dating 3 minths and go out a lot after work and she gets hit on a lot at bars. I think her personality/behavior sends the wrong message to men.", "post": "Me(M28) and my girlfriend(F24) have been dating 2 months, we work together and will go to local bars after work. We work a job where we interact with many people from town. When we go out guys are constantly coming up to her and talking to her(which i have zero problem with) but tye problem i have is she comes off as almost flirty and will hug people as they come up to say goodbye to us.\n To me it gives off the vibe that she is flirting with them. One guy actually came to our work and gave her his phone number. Now im no bitch i say something to these men when it bothers me. \n\nMy question is, would it be wrong to tell her being friendly and hugging men goodbye gives off a vibe that she is available or interested? \nIs it wrong that i ask her to tone it down a bit with that kind of thing.", "summary": "girlfriend comes off as flirty to men and hugs them goodbye when we go to bars. Was wondering if im wrong to be upsetm"}
{"id": "t3_2sh90p", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How to Respond to Ex girlfriends (16/F) text? [17/M]", "post": "My gf and I broke up a week ago. She broke up with me. She ended up wanting to become friends with benefits and I said no. I said it would be harder for me to move on if I did that and it made me feel like I was being used. So I was really missing her last night and I posted a song lyric from our fav song and put a broken heart next to it. We dated a long time. Anyways, after s week of not talking, she texted me \"so you say you have to move on but you post that?\". How do I respond? It was Kinda rude of her the way she said it but I honestly miss her but I'm not crawling back because she treated me poorly. She is immature. Plus she is flirting with so many guys and she broke up with me. What would be a nice good response?", "summary": "EX wants to know why I posted sad song lyric missing her, don't know how to respond, haven't talked in a while"}
{"id": "t3_4vvc3i", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Neighbor drove into my patio and his insurance is not helping.", "post": "This has been an ordeal for months now and is getting to the point where I may need to get a lawyer involved.\n\nMy neighbor drove into my patio door and damaged the patio door, some of the carpeting inside, patio furniture and a large planter. This was a hit and run as the neighbor then left and did not report this. One of my other neighbors noticed damage on his vehicle later that evening and we called the police to come take a look at the vehicle. When questioned, the neighbor with a damaged car admitted fault to the police officer.\n\nHis car insurance company is not the greatest, and is only offering a resolution of the actual value of the items and not the replacement value. Therefor, the amount of money they are offering is less than what it would even take to repair the sliding patio door. Side note: when I do email or call, it can take 4 days to get s response via email and I have yet to receive a phone call back even when I have requested it.\n\nOur home owners insurance company is able to put a claim in, but then we would have the issue of our rates going up if we do that.\n\nCan we file a law suit against our neighbor or our neighbors insurance company? Is there anything that can be done with the insurance company to even maybe just push them to give us the replacement value at all? We reside in Illinois.", "summary": "neighbor drove into my house. Admitted fault. Neighbors insurance company won't pay up. Anything we can do?"}
{"id": "t3_1eqvle", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [m/22] don't know if I should ask her [f/22] out on a date or leave it be.", "post": "I'm a part of a co-ed organization that gets new recruits every spring. Each new recruit gets paired up with an older member so that the older member may be a mentor to the new recruit. I happened to be paired up with a fun and very beautiful girl. I really liked her, but she had a boyfriend. I respected that and kept things strictly mentor related. \nA few weeks ago, I was at a bar with some friends and this girl randomly shows up to hang out with us. She and I break off to get drinks from the bar and we start talking. She told me that she and her boyfriend broke up. She then told me that she always had a thing for me, but obviously never acted on it because she was in a relationship. Unfortunately she had to work the next day so nothing really come of the night besides her telling me this.\nFrom the point where she told me this till now, she has treated me differently. Some days she is very flirty with me, but other days she acts like she had a chafe of heart and treats me like just a friend with no potential of dating. \nI want to ask her out on a date, but I'm not sure if it's a good idea. I'm not worried about rejection. I just don't want to put her into an awkward position since I'm her mentor.", "summary": "Girl that I'm a mentor to told me she likes me. She goes between flirting and treating me like a friend. I don't want to mess up the mentor dynamic by asking her out and being wrong about her intentions."}
{"id": "t3_2ao5mh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my housemate [27 F] of 4 months, I have a crush on her, she started dating recently", "post": "We get along very well, and a big part of why there is nothing between us is because we house together. Kind of a don't shit where you eat thing, she had a bad experience in the past.\n\nNonetheless I can't help but wishing there could be something between us. I was able to cope with it thinking she might change her mind as time passes, but recently she started seeing someone and it came as quite a blow.\n\nMy intention is not to have her break-up with him, or try to win her over, more power to her if she's happy; I just don't know how to deal with these feelings. It's especially difficult considering I see her every single day. Do I try to avoid her? Do I suck it up and act as if nothing is bothering me? Do I open up and discuss my issues with her? Every option I try to think of has pros and cons, and I'm at a loss what the right course of action is here.\n\nI should note she moves out in a couple of months, but that's still a long time to live with this issue from my point of view.\n\nThanks for your help.", "summary": "have a crush on my housemate, she's kind of into me as well, but chose someone else, now I'm sad."}
{"id": "t3_4wlmfg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [38 M] with my new girlfriend [31 F] 2 weeks, introducing new gf after separation from wife (9 years relationship, 7 years married).", "post": "I've been married for 7 years, and was together with my ex wife for about 2 years prior to that. We separated in spring (may/june), and we are done. Law here in Norway means we have to be separated for a year. We have two children together, 6 and 1,5 years old.\n\nI've met three women from Tinder, one of whom I'm now intimate with. We're very open with each other, and consider ourselves gf/bf and are exclusive. Neither of us have any hurry to make things very serious as we are both vulnerable because of past breakups. She will not be introduced to my kids before we're ready (after new year?).\n\nWe came home from a very nice weekend together a short while ago. One of my closest neighbors, who I also consider a friend, was outside. I introduced my new gf (only by name, but he probably read the situation), and had a talk with him about what he'd been up to the past weeks, as we'd both been on summer holiday. My wife lived here with me almost since we met. I felt awkward introducing someone new, and uneasy now after it's done.\n\nWe are both reluctant to officially announce being together, since our past breakups are not too far in the past (hers in june). We're not sneaking around or keeping it a secret, but we're not announcing it either. She's more reluctant then me as she has a past of some broken relationships.\n\nI'm still processing the breakup, and probably still will for several months. I feel like I'd be judged if I made this public, but this is'nt anything very unusual. Am I being crazy?", "summary": "Met someone new after about 3 months separation, and feel uneasy introducing new gf to people. She feels the same."}
{"id": "t3_2e8wr5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] am uncertain about my future with my SO [27/M] because he still lives with his parents.", "post": "I have been dating my boyfriend for a year and a half and this is my first real relationship.  I met him when I was attending college through friends and we started dating around my junior year. He lives with parents, but he works full time (he's not very wise with his finances). He's always talked about moving out but honestly, it doesn't seem like he's going anywhere because he basically lives paycheck to paycheck.  He buys video games, weed, and eletronics that he only messes around with for a short period of time. Since he lives with his parents he relies on his mom to do his laundry, to cook him food, and clean his room/bathroom. But isn't 27 too old for that? Or am I being too judgmental? \n\nI really do love my boyfriend and this is the first time where I've felt like I can truly love someone (I come from an abused childhood).  However, whenever I bring up the fact that he should try to save his money, he gets upset and starts arguing with me. This worries me. Since this is my first real relationship, I'm not quite sure what to do.", "summary": "Im uncertain about my future with my boyfriend because is 27 and lives with his parents, while relying on his mom to cook & clean."}
{"id": "t3_3k6cgl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 3 months (talking for 6, known for years), she isn't okay with one of my best friends being a girl I once hooked up with", "post": "Okay, so my girlfriend of 3 months has a big issue with one of my best friends of like 4 years being a girl who I hooked up with once four years ago.  \n\nAnytime I mention my friend (i'll call C) to my Girlfriend (I'll call gf) she shuts down and just gets quiet and doesn't talk.  I've asked her about it and she gets so jealous and uncomfortable at the thought of me being good friends with a girl whom I've hooked up with (not even sex).\n\nI do understand how some odd feelings could arise from it, but C is just my good friend and that's it.  We often talk about how she'll be my best man and I'll be her maid of honor... obviously we're not interested in each other.  \n\nThe problem is that I can't fully commit to someone who doesn't trust me fully.  I trust my GF, but if that isn't reciprocated, then I feel short changed.  I have never cheated before, mind you.  I just don't know how to handle it.  I tell my GF every single day how much she means to me, but it seems to fall on deaf ears.  This is possibly a make or break thing for me, because I won't stop being friends with C.  I'm not going to be the guy who shuts out everyone for a GF.  And the thing is that me and C only hang out maybe two times every three weeks.\n\nWhat do I do or say to my GF to get her okay with C?  I've had us all hang out before and it seems to go well, but any day after, GF still is upset about it.", "summary": "my girlfriend is super uncomfortable with me being good friends with a girl that I hooked up with one time four years ago."}
{"id": "t3_c5jio", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "With all the blatant selfishness and greed in the world, would a course like this really make a difference?", "post": "I've been thinking about heading back to school and doing a Masters course in some business related field but I'm sick of all the stories of  corporate greed, lies and selfishness. \n\nI think that corporations not only have a responsibility to their shareholders but also to their employees and to the better good of society/environment.\n\nAnyway, I'm an Aussie and I came across this course: \n[Graduate Certficate in Social Impact](\n\nSo my question is, would doing a course really make a difference if both government and corporations don't feel the need to uphold these ethics/responsibilities if it gets in the way of either the bottom line or popular votes?\n\nNow I know some of you will say, why don't you volunteer/spend time in a foreign land helping out/donate? Well, I've done all these things but yet, when I come back to working with large corporations/government, they're mostly measured by money and the perception that they're a responsible corporate citizen.", "summary": "Would a course in Social Impact in a business context really be useful in the future or is it a waste of time and money? Am I just kidding myself?"}
{"id": "t3_10mi2v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19f] feel like my boyfriend [20m] is babying me.", "post": "We've been together for almost 11 months. Lately, it seems like he's babying me and it makes me feel like he thinks I'm stupid. A lot of the time, it has to do with my car. I'll say something to him about something that's wrong (power steering is messed up right now, for example), and he'll tell me all these things about how dangerous it is and how I need to take it to a mechanic, and that he can do it for me at this time, blah blah blah. Another thing is with school. If I miss a class, he'll be sure to tell me to email the Professor... like I don't already know that... And with work. I haven't been getting many hours, and I was complaining to him, and he keeps telling me to threaten to quit if they don't give me more hours, etc.\n\nI'm getting pretty annoyed. I'm not stupid. I can take care of myself. Maybe it's just his way of showing he cares, but it's making me feel like he thinks I'm dumb or something... I don't know. Any advice on how to get him to stop? I don't want him to take it the wrong way.", "summary": "My boyfriend is making me feel stupid by telling me to do really common sense things when it comes to my car, my job, and my classes. How can I make him stop?"}
{"id": "t3_2btlym", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "trouble with me 21f and ex 21m....does he want to start something up again? or friends?", "post": "We broke up about 8 months ago due to me being going through A LOT of personal crap. He knew the whole time I still cared for him and I wanted him back. We have had very little contact but some since the break up. He has always expressed that he would be here for me whenever i needed him.\n\nHe would also confuse me, because he would text me and then stop. A couple weeks later again he would do the same thing. My birthday he sent me a REALLY long message saying he hopes my day is incredible etc. \n\nAbout a month ago I added him back on fb and snapchat because he deleted me because he wanted me back.\n\nThat probably doesn't make much sense because earlier I said he wouldn't take me back but he was kind of strange in a way that he felt that since we broke up it was for a reason and we could not be together again..\n\nWell this whole summer he has been in Spain for school. He recently came back and we started snap chatting. I initiated because I sent it to everyone and put it on my story. To my surprise, he snapped me back and we started talking. (This was yesterday) I asked him about Spain and he said he has a lot of pictures if I wanted to see. AND THEN later in the day I asked him to send me a recipe and he said \"Or I can teach you how to make it\" Totally caught me off guard, so I said \"Yeah you should because it's really good\" then he continued saying \"let me know when you move back in [to school]\" \n\nI'm not sure what his intentions are and I am honestly too afraid to ask. I'm in love with this kid and breaking up with him made me realize how much I cared for him. I did tell him once that he pursued me the wrong way and we went too fast and that we should have been friends first.\n\nSo I am taking this as a friendship right now but I REALLY am trying not to get my hopes up. I know he still cares but he is so stubborn I don't know if he is wanting to rekindle the relationship.", "summary": "My ex of 8 months who I broke up with suggested dinner in a very very casual way. Not sure what to think. I am still in love with him."}
{"id": "t3_1iovri", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[23F] with my boyfriend [25M], I think I would like to be in a polyamorous relationship. I have no idea how to tell him", "post": "I love my boyfriend and we have an amazing relationship. We have been dating for 7 years. I met him when I was 16, and have never really dated or been with anyone else besides him.\n\nHe is a wonderful person and also my best friend. The sex is great and I feel like a crazy person for wanting to explore and open our relationship up to other people. I have felt this way for a while, but always struggled with it and swallowed those feelings- I have been told by many people that polyamory always fails and destroys relationships.\n\nRecently I found out that some coworkers and friends are in \"closeted\" polyamorous relationships. They seem wildly happy and when they told me I was surprised at how jealous I felt.\n\nI would also like to explore because right now I feel like my sexuality is toying with me. I feel attracted to some women but I have never acted on those feelings.\n\nLastly, I am very anxious and feel guilty about how my boyfriend will take all of this. I feel like I should have realized this about myself sooner, and that telling him will really shock and upset him. He moved away from all of his family to come out here and be with me, and I really care about him and want this relationship to work. \n\nAm I being selfish for wanting to bring this up with him? It seems unfair to come at him with this after 7 years of being in a happy monogamous relationship with him. There is also a good chance that communicating this want to him could end our relationship.", "summary": "Been in a monogamous relationship for 7 years, would like to open up relationship but have no idea how to tell boyfriend about it, worried that talking to him could break us up"}
{"id": "t3_2j2mk8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my girlfriend [17 F] of three months. This is kinda a silly question, but I was wondering if you guys could give me input on my idea for asking her to out school cotillion.", "post": "Hello all!  \n  So I have been dating a girl for three months after almost a year of being best friends, and it is coming to that time of year when the boys begin asking girls to the school cotillion, which is a dance. When it comes to asking girls, many guys are usually pretty simplistic with it, however I would want to do something that was creative.  \n  Now coincidentally her birthday is on the 31, which is Halloween (and also our 4 month anniversary!) so I definitely plan on getting her some gifts. One gift that I want to give her is a pair of pajama pants that I have that she says she loves. Now these pajama pants which I would order online are also consumable, so I can add text to it.  \n  Would it be a good idea to ask her by buying a pair with \"Cotil?\" on the pants? I think it is creative, but I am not sure because the text would be on there forever. I know this is a weird question but I want to ask her in the best way possible, so any feedback would be great!  \n     Thank you all!", "summary": "would it be weird to ask my girlfriend to our school cotillion  by getting customized pajama pants with \"Cotil?\" written on it?"}
{"id": "t3_313tad", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is it possible to be married but live apart? I'm 29/F, husband 35/M", "post": "My husband posted on here about this a few days ago, but left out a lot of details so I'm just going to ask my own question:\n\nWhat's it like to be married and live in separate homes?\n\nBackstory: We married November 1st and I instantly started having major health issues. I did NOT know he was miserable at his job and trying to avoid telling me about it so I could fight through my issues, so fell into a deep depression, which I couldn't see. Obviously this made things worse, involved some funny activity on our bank account (mistake #1 -- we should not have combined finances!) and caused him to start lying a lot. I got better in January-ish, but he was totally absent -- I wasn't allowed to have feelings, etc etc. \n\nI moved out in early February and filed for divorce on March 1st (but isn't finalized until we sign papers, which would be at the soonest June 1st.) We spent about 2-3 weeks apart before I finally called him to talk. I had been in therapy and so had he -- and we had both grown and realized SO much. I had issues stemming from my parents and so did he. My own negativity was because of my relationship with my mom (I haven't talked to her in 2 weeks now -- planning no contact with her and communicating only with dad) and he's become -- this sounds so cheesy -- just the most AWESOME person.\n\nI've already signed a lease on my own place and he's living with friends in a very healthy house (literally -- everyone eats really well, sleeps by 10pm, etc.). \n\nFor us, I think we need our own spaces to keep growing and healing and find our own happiness -- mostly because we both never HAD space as adults (he's 35, I'm almost 30) and we want to be able to have an awesome marriage. Living together might actually hinder the process we're making in therapy and the ability to learn how to be OURSELVES.\n\nAlso: We are seeing a couples therapist tonight, who hopefully we will see regularly moving forward. This was mistake #2 -- not seeing one MONTHS ago.", "summary": "Can we live apart -- even just for 6 months to a year -- and have a great marriage? Have you done it?"}
{"id": "t3_3154i1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20/m] am confused as all get out about the actions of my girlfriend [20/f]. Please help?", "post": "I have been dating my girlfriend for about two months at this stage, so not all that long. I really like her, but so far it's been a roller coaster for me interpreting her actions.\n\nShe's done some awesome things for me like surprise me with random gifts and asked me to accompany her on dates that were a really big deal for her, like her first baseball game ever. They were front row seats, and her dad and brothers LOVE baseball. Yet, she took me. That really meant a lot to me, and it's various things like this that make me think that she genuinely likes me. Plus, she's a really good looking girl (so many guys after her) so it's not like she'd have to stay with me if she didn't like me. \n\nHowever, I'm confused as fuck because we went from texting and talking everyday for a month and a half to all of a sudden her basically dropping off the face of the earth. I know she's been having a difficult personal life lately and has been very, very busy, so I think this is part of it. Sometimes this means not texting/calling me back for two or three days at a time though and she hardly ever initiating the conversations anymore. I understand being busy. I work two jobs and am a full time student and I still find time to talk to her, so this kind of hurts.\n\nI really like her and would like to try my best to make this work before I give up, but I'm not sure what to do right now. For the past three weeks, I've felt like I was the last priority in her life. It's possible she could be fading on me, but then out of the blue she'll text me things about how sweet I've been being. \n\nSeriously, what is up here?", "summary": "I'm pretty sure my gf really does like me, but she sure hasn't been putting effort into the relationship the last 3 weeks. Whats up?"}
{"id": "t3_1bqg8w", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I think I have Reddit to thank for being broken up with", "post": "Hi, quick backstory is my now ex-boyfriend decided that he wasn't happy and instead of hashing it out with me and seeing what could be done he came straight to Reddit where people confirmed that it wasn't working and that he should end it. I think it's a shame that no one encouraged him to discuss with me. All he did was give me a \"trial week\" that I had no idea about and during that week he didn't discuss anything, issues or fixes. I was kept in the dark and then suddenly, he just ends it and stops talking to me. (The no contact rule should only really be used to get over someone who you don't want to be friends with again in my opinion. It's more damaging than people realise..)\n\nSince this has happened I have been able to self-reflect and have learnt what I did wrong on my own and am on the path to becoming a better, more optimistic person. (I had some depressing issues in my life making me miserable) But I realise that there is not much of a chance now to work things out since he is absolutely set on his decision.\n\nIt really pains me that he wasn't able to confront me and try to work things out. Don't cut a knot when it can be untied. I have lost an amazing guy and I know that fighting for him just pushes him away further. So I am taking this time to improve myself.\n\nObviously there is some good advice on here, but remember that your baggage and situation is completely unique and might not be the same for someone else. Just be mindful that some people don't look at the situation from all angles or get unbiased advice, so your advice can actually end up being the make or break in someone else's life.", "summary": "Please be more encouraging of situations with your advice and don't write off the other person unless they are truly an awful, abusive, toxic person. Give the dumpee or potential dumpee a fighting chance please..."}
{"id": "t3_2tz669", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my ex-girlfriend [20 F] duration 8 months. How badly did I mess up trying to get her back?", "post": "Hello,\n\nMy girlfriend broke up with me before Christmas. She told me she loved me and that she felt like shit because she couldn't spend time with me. I let her go.\n\nWe sent each other Christmas gifts. In addition to some stuff I got her before we broke up, I made her a little jar full of notes about what I love about her and why I miss her.\n\nShe told me she hated it because I was trying to guilt trip her. I wasn't. I just wanted to make her something personal. She kept the gift though. She told me all this.\n\nNow all the guys I've spoke to say that doing this was extremely sad and pathetic. So much so that I'm now embarrassed I made it.\n\nWhat I'm asking is, was it a bad thing that I made this and gifted it to her? Did I actually make as big a mistake as I now think I've made? She texted me saying that she never wants to see me again because of the gift I made. This seems like a big over-reaction though to me? Am I just in denial?\n\nGuess I just wanted a place to vent and write something about this.\n\nThanks.\n\nI'm 23, she's 20.", "summary": "Made the girl I love a present telling her why I love her and why I miss her. She hates me after potentially loving me."}
{"id": "t3_538ba4", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Crush asked me out and I'm freaking out?? What should I do?!", "post": "So I've been hanging out with this girl (F20) for a while now (about a year, more frequently recently). I (M21) even posted about her on this account. She basically is a very attractive girl who is also kind of a slut (objectively, she's cheated on all of her boyfriends). \n\nRecently I started developing feelings for her, which I am trying to avoid since nothing good would come out of it.\nI haven't seen her since I started feeling this, about a week ago. I'm pretty sure that she sees me only as a friend and I am perfectly fine with that, but today, she somewhat strangely asked me out.\n\nShe calls me and asks what I'm doing today, when I tell her not much, she's basically saying goodbye and about to hang up, so I ask her if she only called me to ask me that. I can tell she got nervous by how she started talking. She responded something like \"yeah, no, I was wondering if you wanna go for a drink.\" I obviously said sure, and we set a time and place.\n\nNow, there's nothing overly strange with this. She might just want to tell me some gossip like she's done before. But I'm freaking out nonetheless. I would love to be able to not think anything about it and be calm and go with it, but I can't help feeling jumpy and nervous.\n\nWhat should I do? Is there anything I can do to calm down and be more relaxed about this?\n\nAlso, what should I do once I get there? What if she's actually somewhat into me? WTF??\n\nThanks in advance.", "summary": "Girl I've been developing feelings for (but don't want to) asked me out and I don't know what to do. I'm freaking out."}
{"id": "t3_15gg0r", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Christmas vacation with the in-laws, and I'm officially on my first Xanax. How do I get through this week without bitch-slapping someone?", "post": "I told my husband that my one stipulation for going up to his parents for Christmas this year was that he help out with cooking. Every year his mothers \"asks\" for my help in chopping, stirring, frying, and baking the most elaborate and exhausting Christmas dinners for 10 people, while her 4 middle-age sons hide upstairs playing video games and shirking chores. The rest of the trip I usually spend on average 3 hours a day helping her prepare and clean up after meals for \"the boys\". My husband's enthusiastic attempt to help today quickly turned into disgruntled anger once he realized how much work was involved. This led to him arguing with his brothers about helping out, and finally a lecture from his mother to ME about how in her day, the women would never think of asking the men to help. How the fuck do I stay civil to these clowns for rest of this trip?", "summary": "Christmas vacation with my in-laws means that I am subjected to a week of gender-based slavery and I need advice on how to get through it."}
{"id": "t3_qpxz8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need to write a victim impact statement about being sexually assaulted from my ex boyfriend. Any tips? More info inside...", "post": "We are both in High School yet, and when my ex boyfriend (Lets call him \"Randy\") and I started dating in mid September this last year, 2011. We were together a little over a month, so through October, but during that time he was extremely pushy about everything, and with everything. He couldnt keep his hands to himself, and was abusive physically and verbally. We would be sitting in the park nearby my house, and he would push me down onto the picnic, pin me there, and run his hands up my shirt and down my pants. I had a curfew to  be home by, and wouldnt care, he'd keep me pinned on the table grinding his nasty body against mine. I would tell him I didnt want this to happen, that I wasnt comfortable, and he told me that if I didnt go along with it that he would spread word around that I was sleeping with all these different guys, that I was smokin' it up everyday, that I cheated on my past boyfriends with someone else, etc. So naturally I was scared to say anything against what he \"wanted to do.\"  Along with pinning me down, he would take my hand and force me to give him a handjob and would try to thrust my head down to give him a blowjob as well. \n\nThis happened on numerous occasions...I feel so guilty right now for not laying down ground rules and boundaries, and Im full of regret that had anything to do with him. \nWhat scares me though is that this all happened in September-October 2011, and I just filed sexual harrassment against him last month or so. The reason I waited so long was because I was afraid to talk about it to anybody, I was constantly angry so I distanced myself from people. Until I finally opened up to one of my closest friends about what he did, and she suggested I file sexual assault.\nSo now I have to write a victim impact statement, and I was wondering if Reddit had any tips for doing that? I believe myself to be good with words, but I just want this to be the best possible so that (hopefully) something will be done.", "summary": "My ex was a douchenozzle andcouldnt keep his hands to himself and I have to write a victim ipmact statement and need help to make it the best as possible."}
{"id": "t3_23ouc2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my girlfriend [24 F] 6 months, How long should you stay in a relationship you know isn't going to end in wedding bells", "post": "Six months in a relationship with my Girlfriend and through our conversations I have come to the conclusion that we are not going to go all the way and that is fine. Basically our biggest issues stem from the fact that she does not have the life experiences that she feels that she needs and I am holding her back. \n\nI have no interest in being controlling and I have no right to tell my GF what she can and can't do but I am also entitled to have feelings about things. I have just let her know which actions I would find disrespectful or hurtful.\n\nAnyway in the short term this is fine and we really enjoy each other. Long term this is going to be a problem. She is not a bad person and I hope I am not either. This just isn't going to work long term.\n\nSo how long does the hive mind think is healthy to stay in a relationship that you know has to end? Everyone is different I would just like to establish a baseline.", "summary": "Even if you are enjoying the relationship at what point do you need to move on if you know that you have no future."}
{"id": "t3_2uc9gw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] don't know how to approach my [18F] roommate about her incessant, loud and distracting singing", "post": "My roommate (18) and I (19) get along pretty well, but whenever she's in the dorm room, she plays her music aloud and sings at the top of her lungs. She does this constantly, and it's extremely loud and distracting. My friends can often barely hear me over Skype (even when I'm using a headset), and it makes it really difficult to focus on work. I tell her to turn it down occasionally when it gets really absurd, but I want a more long-term solution. It's been going on for a semester now and my non-confrontational ways have prevented me from talking to her about it. I don't want to get into a fight, and I don't want to upset her. \n\nI know I need to talk to her about not singing in the room, but I don't know how to say it without sounding rude. At this point, I can only assume she thinks I'm totally okay with it. She's not doing it to be annoying, and she probably doesn't even realize it's kind of rude, and really distracting when I'm studying or trying to talk to friends. I don't think she's ever roomed with someone before, so I don't think she's considered what another person might want. I'm just really fed up with it, and I want to have a conversation with her instead of snapping at her.\n\nI'm worried that if I just confront her about it, she'll get angry. She's not someone who would tell me to my face that she's upset, but she talks bad about people to me a lot, and I'm worried she'll think I'm being harsh. She clearly thinks her singing is good, and she tries to get me to listen to her sing all the time. I've made jokes about how I don't want to listen to her, but she seems to brush them off and continue anyway.  \n\nAny suggestions on how to talk to her about the singing would be very appreciated! Thanks in advance.", "summary": "Roommate won't stop singing loudly in our dorm room, and I need a polite way to get her to stop."}
{"id": "t3_279lb6", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I like a popular girl...", "post": "So I met this girl a couple weeks ago and we became friends. We became friends because I would help her with the relationship she was in. She would tell me things about her boyfriend and things she was annoyed with him about... and their sex life. LONG story short they broke up. She would still talk to me then find me walking in the halls. Then sometimes she would text me too. Sometimes I would catch her staring at me.\n \nOne thing that is difficult is she is popular. I am an inbetweener. She is also really pretty and I think she is WAY out of my league. But one of my friends (who is a girl) said that she mite be playing hard to get. She also has never asked to hang out with me, but does with her other guy friends. I really don't know. I don't want to make a move then ruin our friendship. So I don't know if she likes me or she is just being friendly. I don't know if I should try to go for her either. Any advise would be helpful. Thank you", "summary": "I like a popular girl. I am an inbetweener I really don't know if she likes me. Some people tell me she is playing hard to get, but i don't know."}
{"id": "t3_12oob9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M27] slept with separated close friend [F26]. She wants more. How do I let her down easy?", "post": "I'll try to keep it as short as possible: \n\nThrough most of my university years, I was close friends with a beautiful girl who was well out of my league (back then). Yes, I was well and truly in the friendzone. She got married last year to a guy she'd known for only a few months. Last month, she got into a fight with her husband and moved out of their home. During a night of comforting her at my place, one thing led to another and we had sex. Over the next three weeks, we kept at it and spent a lot of time with each other, mostly in the bedroom. \n\nNow, she's started to talk about filing for divorce and about \"us\" and our future. I have never hinted that I am interested in a relationship or being anything more than FWBs. She seems to be assuming that I would want her as a girlfriend based on my personality she got to know in university, which as since changed a lot.\n\nFor a number of reasons, I don't want to get into a relationship, especially not with her. I want her to do what is right for her (divorce vs. no divorce) without factoring me into her decision. I feel like my only choice may be to bite the bullet and risk losing her as a friend by being clear that I don't want a relationship with her. Has anybody else been in this situation? Is there a way to let her down easy and not lose our friendship?", "summary": "Slept with close friend while she was separated from her husband. Now she wants a relationship and seems to be moving towards divorce based on that. I don't want a relationship. How do I let her down without ruining the friendship?"}
{"id": "t3_2fv0ml", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] how do I find friends?", "post": "So I'm 20 very shy because of my past but I am working on over coming that. I get along with everyone even though it takes me a while but I have never had close friends that I would hang out with and stuff. \n\nThe last 4 or 5 years I have traveled all over Australia for work so when I met some one I would only know them for 2 maybe 3 months then never talk to them again. I don't drink or party so that cuts a huge amount of people out but there must be more people like me but where and how?\n\nExtra note, my old Girl Friend deleted my FB account because I had all her friends added and I could never be bothered making a new one.", "summary": "Where are good places to find new mates? How do I start the conversation and get there number or organise to do something?"}
{"id": "t3_533hc8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My husband(25M) was physically abusive. Now I think I(22F) am emotionally abusive in retaliation.", "post": "In the first couple years of our relationship my husband was physically abusive. He got help and it stopped happening. It's been nearly 3 years since the abuse stopped., But I still haven't gotten over it. I still feel anger and hurt towards him. I watched a movie showing an emotionally abusive relationship and I recognized myself as the abuser! Constant putdowns, always disagreeing with him (most of the time it comes out before I even think about it and I realize I don't ACTUALLY disagree, I just wanted to), refusing to apologize for stupid things, and belittling him in front of our friends.\n\n I feel so bad after realizing this because for the last year I have had it in my head that he is a terrible person and HE was the emotionally abusive one, but I think it's me! I want to make this better, because I don't want to be divorced at such a young age! I want to make this work. He has said many times he wants to be married to me. \n\nI should also include I have depression, I have had it since I was a teenager, but I have always been off and on my medicine. My husband says when I'm on my medicine he enjoys being around me, but when I come off of it I'm miserable to be around. I have been on my medicine for a few weeks now and I actually want to stay on it now that I've recognized this pattern. Hopefully that helps me in the future!\n\nI want to deeply apologize to him for how I've treated him. A real, meaningful apology. And I want to STOP this pattern.", "summary": "exactly as the title reads. How can I first off show him how sorry I am, and secondly STOP this behavior quickly?"}
{"id": "t3_4yh4e0", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(18M) How to move on from my ex? (24M)", "post": "Hey RA, so I need some help. I (18M) had been in a committed relationship with my ex (24M) for a good few months, but recently he broke up with me. It wasn't a bitter break up by any means. It wasn't something either of us did, it was just that he is having personal issues (he really is it's not a lie like I originally thought) and doesn't think he could do a relationship right now and doesn't want to give me the burden of his issues. In fact, we both agreed that we would remain friends and see what the future holds for us, but not to make any expectations. I am ok with that, I just miss him so much. We broke up on Tuesday night and I just need some advice of where to go from here. I have started talking to a few other guys and one guy (22M) is really nice and is just a good decent guy, but every few hours or so I think of my ex and I don't want to. Is it wrong for me to still like my ex or is it normal since it's only been a few days? I do have alittle bit of an emotional attachment to my ex and I don't want to cut him out of my life cause we are such great friends and I don't want to close the door on a friendship. Thoughts keep rolling through my head of whether or not he's out tonight and sleeping with someone else or on another date. I feel bad for being hypocritical but I can't help it, my mind lingers towards it. So I guess I just need some advice on what would be best for me. Thank you guys so much and I'm sorry if I rambled on a little bit.", "summary": "Ex broke up with me two days ago, we still want to be friends but I can't seem to move on right now"}
{"id": "t3_2g7kxa", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Can I work on a personal project that benefits my employer? Washington State labor law question", "post": "I am employed in a position that does NOT involve programming. I have no programming obligations of any kind. I would like to build some programs that automate various tasks that my co-workers and I have to do. Legally, am I able to work on this on my own time and therefore not get paid for it or am I legally obligated to work on it only on my employer's time as it does benefit my employer. My employer offered to let me work on this for a few hours each week during our slow days on company time as they do not want to take advantage of me however I do not want to get paid for this, I want to do it for the learning experience and because I think it will be fun.", "summary": "I want to make a program for my job and not get paid for it. Is there any way for me to get around Washington State labors laws so I can do this?"}
{"id": "t3_1w2u1c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO [21/M] intentionally does or says things to make me [20/F] mad, then laughs at my reaction. What to do?", "post": "I have been in this relationship for almost two years. It hasn't been perfect and I believe it's been on a downhill slope for a while. My boyfriend has recently started a new behavior with me where he will intentionally do or say something that he thinks will annoy me or make me mad, and if he gets a reaction out of me, he laughs.\n\nFor example, he will invite me out to dinner with his friends, then he won't text me when the time comes for dinner. When I text him asking when dinner will be, he'll say, \"whoops I forgot, we're actually eating now.\" Then ten minutes later will say, \"Just kidding, we're leaving in an hour.\"\n\nSometimes, if I excuse myself to return a text when he's around, he sticks his hand onto my screen and moves it around to mess up my text. If I try to pull my phone away, he says, \"I've always wanted to do that: mess up your text just to annoy you.\"\n\nThe last time I tried to have a conversation with him about where our relationship was headed, he just sat down and started laughing, saying that the conversation was \"funny\" to him. When I asked him why he felt that way, all he could say was \"this is just a funny situation. It's just hilarious. It's just so funny.\" Without any further explanation.\n\nI'm not one to feed the troll, but it is beginning to get really annoying. I don't know how to handle this situation other than to just ignore it when it happens, but it is honestly beginning to get really hurtful. Sometimes it feels like I am dealing with a child. Any input on what to do/why he may be acting this way would be appreciated.", "summary": "Boyfriend does things just to get a rise out of me; refuses to talk about the situation and dismisses my feelings with laughter."}
{"id": "t3_4nh15o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [38 M] longtime friend [40ish M] is giving me the cold shoulder", "post": "For a few years I had some pretty tough times (divorce, medical problems) and didn't handle it very well. I don't have a lot of friends, and during this time I lost most of them. \n\nOne guy always stood by me though. We've known each other for many years, and he was the best man in my wedding. I consider him a brother, and we used to see each other a few times a month. But the past year or two he has been very distant and not very talkative. We used to take turns organizing events, and invited each other to things all the time. Now I have to initiate something, and he usually has a reason he can't go. I no longer get any emails, and recently he had a housewarming party that I wasn't invited to.\n\nI really want to hang out with him and honestly need a friend, but feel that the friendship is practically over and he's just too nice to tell me the truth.", "summary": "Want to hang out with an old friend who's giving me the cold shoulder, but don't know how to ask what's up."}
{"id": "t3_nddo9", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "How do i live with my ex for a few more weeks", "post": "Me 30m and my girlfriend 23f of 4 years just broke up a few days ago. We have dated on and of the entire 4 years.We have lived together for about 3 years off and on. We usually go about 8-11 months and then we lose interest it seems then get back together a month or so later. We had trust issues in the beginning but we both moved past alot and trust was rebuilt.\n We have been dating again since may so about 6 months into this. In these six months our communication was 100% better and had some of the best times.\n\n Well up until about 1 1/2 weeks ago.. She started being distant and in turn i reflected the same behavior and became distant as well. Things went south quickly so I start a talk and we admit were mutually unhappy.. But she admits she is emotionally cheating, but its nothing more, and says she doesn't want to break up. But i decide the trust has been broken. And say i cant deal with that anymore.  We are on a m2m lease and nether of us can afford our apt alone. We have very minimal contact. I stay away from our home when i know shes there and she does the same. Its very stressful and i have no idea how to deal with this. I didnt expect this to happen at all. It doesnt hurt the worst but its hard for me because of all the stuff we have together. I feel if we are breaking up, this is IT. I need support.", "summary": "broke up with my GF of 4 years we still live together for at least another 2-3 weeks.. need tips to keep my sanity"}
{"id": "t3_2mq1r3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 y/o M] am having trouble with my co-workers bad mouthing me. Any advice?", "post": "I am currently on an internship in my home town, and have two other interns that work with me. They live together and have grown close, while I live at home. One of them really likes to talk about how bad of worker I am. I do not conciser myself a bad worker, just very conscious in what I do, and it slows me down some. I get the job done. \n\nI wouldn't really care what he said if I wasn't in my home town, but this is where my friends and family live. Everyone from my high school is coming home from college and we are all meeting at the bar. No doubt the other interns will be there. \n\nI have worked hard to keep a good reputation, but I know that this intern will bad mouth me to my friends at the bar when I'm not around. I don't know what to do. Being a good worker is one of the best traits that someone can have since I live in the Midwest. \n\nPlease help me.", "summary": "Live at home on internship. Intern talks badly about me. Friends and acquaintances are coming home this weekend, and I know that the other interns will talk a lot of shit. Please help"}
{"id": "t3_2p2wxb", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (22F) can't cope with rejection. Any advice?", "post": "Hi, it's my first time writing here - also english is not my native language, so please excuse any mistakes.\nMy problem is that I realized I can't cope with rejection. As soon as a guy \"rejects\" me or states that he doesn't want a relationship/he's not interested I become obsessed (please note, not a stalker - I'm not *THAT* crazy) I just can't stop thinking about him and wondering what is wrong with me and why he's not interested in me.\n\nI am now aware that I really can't cope with rejection because of what happened two days ago.\nI was at a club, partying with some friends of mine, when a nice-but-really-not-my-type guy asks me a cigarette and after a quick talk kisses me. He wasn't really my type, but there was a good chemistry and I would have loved, maybe, to become FWB with him (or at least to give it a try) so I asked him if I could add him on facebook, so we could \"hang out sometimes\" and he tells me that it sounds like a great idea and also invites me to grab a coffee in the bar he works at.\nThe day after he REJECTS (not ignore, actually REJECTS) my friendship request on facebook, but adds a friend of a friend of mine.\n\nNeedless to say I felt like sh*t because I can't see what I did wrong. I wasn't being too clingy but neither too uninterested. I just tried to act friendly and he seemed to be enjoying it.\n\nOf course I'm trying to brush it off as \"I don't even know him, too bad for him\" and things like this, but actually I feel really terrible.\nI don't know what's wrong with me.\nAny advice?", "summary": "can't cope with rejection, as soon as a guy proceeds to tell me he's not interested I can't stop thinking about him/about what's wrong with me and also feel terrible. I need advice!"}
{"id": "t3_2xu4xc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [23/F] overreacting that my boyfriend [26/M] is going on a week-long backpacking trip with his female best friend [24/F]?", "post": "Hey, all! Throwaway account time! Here's the story:\n\nMy on-and-off boyfriend of two years is going on a week-long backpacking journey to Thailand with his best friend who is female. Before anyone says anything, I have met her before and she has a boyfriend of two years. However, she is very attractive (a much prettier version of myself) and shares the same interests as my boyfriend. They even used to live together with a bunch of other people. It makes me wonder why they haven't dated. Upon asking my boyfriend this, he has told me he has never hooked up with her, has had feelings for her, or is even attracted to her. He even has gone so far to say that he will never date her as she is like a little sister to him.\n\nSo lately, he told me that he wants to meet up in Thailand for a week  with her alone while she is on her extended backpacking trip to SE-Asia. We have argued about this several times. I continuously told him that this is disrespectful and I don't want him to go. Of course, he goes against my wishes. We recently got back together, so I would understand if he didn't want to go on a vacation with me just yet. \n\nI don't even mind if he went alone to Thailand or with a group, as long as he isn't alone with his female best friend. I find that to be disrespectful. He assures me that they will be staying in hostels with separate beds and he will call me via Skype every single day to make me feel better. We are going on our own vacation later this year. I care about him. I didn't want to give up the relationship, yet. Still, I feel this is crossing way too many boundaries. \n\nAm I overreacting, reddit?", "summary": "My on-and-off boyfriend who I recently got back together with is going on vacation with his female best friend to Thailand. I am not okay with it, but he still insists to go."}
{"id": "t3_1bc676", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Do you think I am getting cheated from a company?", "post": "So I have organized a trip two years in a row now from my University in Raleigh, to Camden, SC for the Carolina Cup horse race. We go as a group of approximately 50 people so we charter a bus for the occasion as it allows to consume copious amounts of alcohol with out a DD. \n\nAnyways for the past 2 years, with two different charter bus companies, each company called me within a week of the event saying the bus broke down.\n\nThis has lead to issues in transportation as we found out the first time around that any and every charter bus in the south east is going to the Carolina Cup at the time. A week before, there is literally no available busses anywhere.\n\nFor the past two years now, we have thought, what are the odds of two different busses breaking down at the exact same time, 1 year apart. Bad luck I guess.\n\nBut then one of my friends brought up something that almost seemed obvious. What if another group is trying to go to this event and order a bus too late, and so they come to our company and say \"We will pay you that plus more\" and the bus company just tells us the bus is broken which would void our contract with them, and then sells it to another group.\n\nHave any of you run into this issue? It's totally logical and really scummy since we know to order our bus 3 months in advance and then we are put in a terrible situation.", "summary": "I believe the local charter bus companies are selling our charted bus to a higher bidder, then lying to us saying the bus is broken to void the contract agreement we have."}
{"id": "t3_3q82mc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (17M) am with my long distance SO (18F) of 1.5 years but feeling feelings for a close friend (17F) and don't know exactly how to feel or how to not egg on", "post": "Sorry about the long post in advance.\n\nHave been in an LDR with a girl named Mary and was super in love with her. I say was because it hasn't felt the same. We have met (Probably about 12 times in person) but recently it hasn't felt the same.\n\nWe're in the same state and all, about 4 hours though. And this year I've grown close with a new friend group including this other girl, Sarah. Recently, it's felt like Mary and I have grown apart. We fight more often, and even about 2 weeks or so we almost broke up. \n\nBut Sarah and I have been hanging out more and more. We were out talking just last night until at least 3 in the morning. I would never cheat on Mary, but it's just been hard with all the stress on our relationship. \n\nSarah is totally different from me, but her and I have become fast best friends, and every time I bring up Mary she gets quiet. I've had a lot of thoughts about breaking up with Mary, but I don't think I could.", "summary": "In a long distance with Mary, going through relationship stress, best friends with a new girl, is it okay to break up for someone close distance? Or should I stick it out?"}
{"id": "t3_28oibv", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by leaving my bedroom window open", "post": "I decided yesterday to leave my window open with a fan in front of it to let some fresher, cooler air in. It was open all day and kept the place relatively livable. At bedtime (aka 3 am) I go to my comfortably cool bedroom. I remember that the screen to my window had fallen off last summer. I think, \"phew, lucky the cat didn't go jumping out a two story window huh.\" I close the window, take off my pants, turn off my fishtank light and get in bed while calling my girlfriend on facetime. \nSOMETHING hits me in the face. It's dark, I don't know what it is. Figure it was a piece of hair or something dumb like that. But it keeps happening, as my girlfriend laughs at me freaking out from her safe distance inside my iphone. Finally, the thing that hit me in the face appears in the light of my phone, which it's clearly attracted to. It's a moth. I laugh it off and turn on the light so I can squish the motherfucker and sleep tight. As I turn on the light another one hits me in the face. I kill the one that's landed on the wall next to me, and go looking for the other one. \nThis is where I realize just how much I've fucked up. They must have been attracted to the light in my fish tank, and the window was open for hours. Now, I'm not scared of moths particularly, but this was an INCREDIBLE amount of moths in one place. And to make it even worse, my fan was drawing them in and turning them into projectiles aimed straight at me. I couldn't possibly find all of them, or get them to all stop flying long enough to kill them. I killed a few but my efforts were futile. There were so many fucking moths. \nI decided to give up my murder spree and just build an inpenetrable blanket fort around me, my bed, and my iphone so I could sleep in moth-free, albeit stuffy peace. I emerged in the morning to a moth-free room. I don't know where they went but I suspect they lie in wait...for revenge.", "summary": "Left my window open all day/night and attracted a fuck ton of moths into my bedroom. Didn't realize until my fan started shooting them at my face. Slept in blanket fort. Revenge moths await me."}
{"id": "t3_1v8bcx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (semi) long distance girlfriend [20 F] just broke up with me [20 M] after 7 months. Should I tell her we can be friends when we meet up?", "post": "My girlfriend of 7 months just broke up with me after I called her asking what was wrong this past weekend. She didn't wanted to break up with me on the phone but since I asked her, she had to say it. She's meeting up with me this Friday since we both go to different colleges (1 1/2 hours away) so we can talk.\n\nI was dumbstruck when she told me and nearly broke down on the phone, begging and pleading that we can work things out (I know, bad idea). She told me the cliche, \"I don't want to be in a relationship right now,\" and \"You were a great boyfriend, but you're not right for me.\" She told me she'll meet with me but her decision won't change.\n\nEven though we didn't date for long, I fell deeply in love with her and she inspired me as a person. I really want to be friends with her because it would be dumb of me to lose such an amazing person in my life, (and not saying that because I loved this girl, but she really is a good person and we both have the same goals in our life) but doing so will hurt me because I will still have these deep feelings for her and I will never know if she does with me. She visits my town pretty often as well because her best friend lives here, who is my best friend as well (the best friend got us together) and will eventually move here.\n\nIf I do the No Contact, that means that I can't hang out with the crew like we always do and we have such great times when we do. Also, the NC will make me think that she'll miss me and come back to me and I want to wait for her when she does.\n\nShould I be friends with her or no?", "summary": "Should I be friends with my ex because she really is an amazing person and I don't want to lose a person like that in my life."}
{"id": "t3_2vnpcf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] with my gf [27 F] 1 & 1/2 year relationship, Need help with breaking up with her.", "post": "So, as the title describes, I'm in a one and a half year relationship with my gf. Things have been going well until early/mid November where I really put things in perspective. \n\n3 months into the relationship, she told me she lied about having a car and said she is on her third learner's permit (she lied out of embarrassment). She confessed the truth, as I was about to meet her whole family on Christmas Eve, so I had to set that aside for the holidays. Also, it's at least a 35 minute/10 mile drive to her place from me; she's never completely attempted to come to me.\n\nThrough last year, I increasingly realized we have very different interests; she is into country music (especially the \"modern\" stuff), sticks to only a few favorite food things, still somewhat shy around me and my friends and loves Bravo. I'm into alternative rock, will try a lot of different food (except Nato; won't eat again), outgoing nerd who loves his video games.\n\nShe still has her learner's permit and can't afford a car since she's still paying student loans and the bills (she still lives w/ her parents). She's also losing her job really soon, but working on getting freelance work.\n\nNow that you have the background, here's my dilema: She's the first non-crazy girlfriend I've had and she's really sweet/kind. The crazy exes were easy to deal with, but her doesn't feel like it will be that easy. How can I prepare myself and let her down as easy as possible? (if possible)", "summary": "Current GF not that easy to break up with; need advice on letting her down easy and getting myself to actually do it"}
{"id": "t3_3cfrr4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23/F] and [25/M] friend - what should I do?", "post": "Basically just letting this out there to get it off my chest and to see what you guys think.\n\nWe've been good friends for about 5 years and I have personally always felt a level of chemistry with him. All of my close girlfriends are convinced he likes me judging by his body language and the way he speaks to me. I didn't really believe them for the longest time until recently when he started to pay me more compliments and doing things like guiding me on the small of my back.\n\nI think I was fine with being just friends with him and was always happy for him when he was in a relationship even though he was clearly dating the wrong types of girls for the wrong types of reasons. And he tends to gravitate towards significantly younger girls for whatever reason he has (commitment?). \n\nI've confronted him once before about my feelings for him when a mutual friend confessed that he knew this guy liked me back(this was awhile ago) but the conversation turned out to be super defensive and tense on his part. And he professed that he didn't want to ruin our friendship; however true that was.  \n\nAnyways, judging by what my friends told me and things he's said, he's unhappy in his current relationship. I've asked him recently whether there was any possibility of us pursuing something and he said that he only considered me as a friend.\n\nI'm fine with being just friends but the constant flirting is getting to me and making me think maybe I do have some feelings for him. I've been reading up on some advice and a lot of people suggest that cutting off ties completely with the person is the best option as a level of infatuation/attraction will always be there to put a barrier to personal relationships.", "summary": "Got \"friendzoned\" by guy but feel that he's lying to himself/myself because he's afraid of the risk of a relationship. Am I reading too  much into this or is he simply just not into me?"}
{"id": "t3_3oatru", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (24/M) falling in love with my roommate (26/F), but she's taken, and isn't into guys anyway. Is there any way for me to get rid of these feelings?", "post": "I moved into my current place a little over a year ago, and it's been pretty good. My roommate's been awesome - she's never late with rent, does her share of the chores without being asked/reminded and does them well (and sometimes does more than her share), etc. And in general, she's just a super cool girl, and we've become friends as well as roommates. We renewed the lease for another year about 2 months ago.\n\nRecently, I realized that I'm falling for her, and falling hard. In so many ways, she's exactly what I want in a girlfriend. But there's no chance for me to ever have a relationship with her - she's lesbian, and she has a girlfriend. \n\nI'm hoping there's a way for me to stop myself from falling in love with her. I can't really do no contact - I live with her after all, and flat out moving out would be a pretty big financial blow to me. Is there anything I can do, or do I just have to tough it out for the next 10 months?", "summary": "Recently renewed lease, realized that I'm falling in love with my not-single lesbian roommate. Is there any way for me to stop myself from falling further in love other than no contact?"}
{"id": "t3_27wc3y", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "IRS says I owe back taxes. This is what emergency funds are for!", "post": "Throw away for reasons.\n\nI got a notice in the mail today saying that I owe $850 in taxes from 2012.\n\nI somehow missed an entire W2 (I work freelance and have several anywhere from 3-12 employers each year), as well as some 1099-G income! I can see why I got audited or whatever, even just taking the standard deduction. My actual income was nearly double that of my reported income. \n\nLong story, but my dad had me cash a lottery ticket for him for $4000. He gave me a couple hundred to do it, but I'm realizing it was probably a bad call now.\n\n--------------\n\nWelp, now I'm out $850 because they want their refund back + the extra missing taxes. Lesson learned. Luckily, I have money in the bank to pay this off. If I had gotten this notice a year ago, I'd be completely and utterly screwed.", "summary": "Messed up my taxes because I'm a dummy, owe the IRS money, have an emergency--can pay the IRS"}
{"id": "t3_52e9lr", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[MI] Mold test at my fiance's workplace came back positive for black mold. Is there any legal ramifications?", "post": "Throwaway. The title pretty much says it all, but the long goes like this:\n\nMy fiance started working for this company as an administrative assistant about a year and a half ago after the company she was working for was acquired by said company. Within the first month  or so of her working there she noticed that there was standing water in the basement of the building that had to mopped/vacuumed up about once a week. She spoke to her boss and he said he was aware of the issue, but they weren't doing anything at the time to fix the problem (mind you this is a building full of engineers and architects).  \n\nFast forward about a year from then, my fiance is now the office manager and was cleaning some documents in basement near the water and found some blueprints with mold on them, she then notifies the president of the company and his response is along the lines of \"you shouldn't have to work in that environment where you could potentially get sick, don't work down there anymore. We will look into the issue.\"  \n\nAnother month goes by and nothing is being done about the issue, so she takes things into her own hands. She gets the go ahead from her boss to schedule an inspection and get a mold test done.  Apart from there being multiple building problems and what not, the mold test comes back positive for black mold. \n\nI should note that this is a building of about 200-300 people, with multiple pregnant women. Since she has started working there my fiance has developed asthma as well as other symptoms that consistent with black mold exposure. \n\nIs there any sort of lawsuit at hand?", "summary": "Fiance's workplace has black mold and she has symptoms consistent with black mold exposure and we don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1c43m3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20M] feel like my boyfriend [33] doesn't like me.", "post": "I know my problem isn't very interesting but it's still eating me up. We've been dating since January of this year. I know we haven't been together very long, and I realize he's a good amount older than me, but I'm still in the honeymoon phase, especially since I hardly see him anymore (maybe once a week). He has other friends and family of course, but he readily spends time with them and skips me. I do whatever I can to spend time with him, but I don't seem any more important to him than a casual friendship. He's acknowledged we're \"dating,\" and we kiss and cuddle and I love it, but I feel like he doesn't want to invest in me.\n\nI should also mention he was in a 5+ year relationship that ended not too long ago, albeit not badly.\n\nAny advice would be appreciated. This is only my second (romantic) relationship.", "summary": "My boyfriend says he's interested in me, but doesn't act like it (anymore), though he says we're dating."}
{"id": "t3_1mp26g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He [22/M] said \"I love you\" after a month of dating and I [19/F] did not. Now he won't speak to me.", "post": "I just need to get this off my chest and could use some advice. I met this guy about a month ago and we clicked right away. We had issues about him wanting sex too soon in a relationship as I was a virgin. Eventually, I went for it and did it. I was really unsure about doing it with him so soon, but I really wanted it and it was actually a pretty great experience. I do not regret it at all and I think I could have not been more ready. We were fine after that up until today when he said \"I love you\" over text. I told him \"Love is strong word.\" That triggered him and he said \"Forget it. I won't say it again.\" Now he won't respond to my texts anymore. \n\nI told him love is something I would prefer to hear or say back in person. I do believe he loves me, but maybe not in love with me. I do have strong feelings for him, but since I've never been in love, I cannot tell. He is much more experienced than I am and has had serious past relationships while I have not. I was thinking about not contacting him anymore and hopefully he would contact me back. If not, I think I will be scarred for life as used by him for sex.", "summary": "I did not say \"I love you\" back and now he won't reply to my texts. Only known him for about a month."}
{"id": "t3_4xr1l2", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Store franchise owner is probably stealing from their store, or at least acting unethically - not sure what to do.", "post": "I'm not sure if I can even do anything, and if the person in question wasn't an asshole or treated his employees so poorly I wouldn't give a shit, but I thought I'd ask for some advice on this situation.\n\nI work at a grocery store that is franchised in Canada, there is no employee discount or similar program offered at any level in the corporation. The grocery costs at these stores are noticeably more expensive than others. The owner regularly does a grocery shop where the bill averages $400-$500, however they just ring it through the till in training mode and don't actually pay any money for their groceries. The training mode bill is then filed away somewhere, and as far as I can ascertain it's written off as theft/shrink through the store. The only reason I can gather that they do this is so they are actually paying a lower amount for their groceries, maybe it works out so they are just paying for groceries at what they cost the store vs. what a customer would pay, that's my guess anyway.\n\nI don't really know how the ordering/costs work for grocery stores and if they are even getting the groceries cheaper but I assume so because why else would they do that? This situation just seems really sneaky, and I can't imagine corporate would be okay with a store franchise owner doing this, but I could just be making something out of nothing. \n\nThere isn't a store ethical hotline or anything similar that I was able to locate on the corporate website, so I thought maybe I'd just get some other people's opinions on this. Maybe I shouldn't care and I'm making a mountain out of a molehill or whatever. \n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Store franchise owner appears to be writing groceries off as shrink rather than paying for them normally, seems unethical, should / could I do something?"}
{"id": "t3_2fexx7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 F] with my husband[30 M] of 9 years, works out a lot or so I think...", "post": "My husband is in really good shape. He takes good care of himself and I am very proud of that. However, I feel, he spends a lot of time working out. My husband works out on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. He normally works out for a few hours (like 3 or 4) on these days and we have little time to talk before or after. He has a gym in our backyard and his friends come over and they work out for hours! It is basically understood that MWF are off limits for spending time as a family. It upsets me but I am not sure if I am overreacting. Does he spend too much time working out? Or do I just need to get over it? I don't know if this matters but we only have 1 child, she is my step-daughter and she only comes every other weekend. And yes, he still works out if she is here.", "summary": "Husband works out 3/4 hours on MWF. Is that too much time to spend working out when you have a family?"}
{"id": "t3_2d49a8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 F] get jealous over small things because my boyfriend [22 M] doesn't make me feel beautiful", "post": "We have been together for over 2 years. We have chemistry like we've never felt for anyone before. **I really REALLY love him.** So he's just not someone I can \"throw away\".\n\nBut he never makes me feel special and it hurts. He **occasionally** tells me I'm beautiful but there is no emotion behind it. It sounds monotone and rehearsed. It sounds like he's saying it out of duty of being a good boyfriend. I'm left feeling like, \"Does my boyfriend even think I'm pretty? Does he prefer other girls to me? Is he satisfied with how I look?\" \n\nBecause of this, I get jealous over dumb stuff like him checking out other girls, or constantly liking other girls' selfies on Facebook (he does it a lot).\n\nHow do I get over this? or how do I bring it up without sounding 12?", "summary": "I get jealous over silly stuff like my boyfriend checking out other girls because I don't know if he finds me attractive."}
{"id": "t3_kd1zr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help us announce our divorce...", "post": "My husband and I of 3 years are getting divorced due to numerous factors, including a realization we were never \"in love\", just scared of being alone. We're great friends and still care about each other (in a brother/sister/best friend sort of way), but we realized that our marriage was making us unhappy and it was time to move on. Overall, very mutual. \nWe've begun the painful process of telling family and friends, most of whom are taking it well, or at least as well as can be expected. We plan to tell his parents Wednesday evening and are at a loss as to what to do. They view me as a daughter and will be devastated by this. Any suggestions on how to ease this blow? I'm concerned about their reaction to me--I expect hurt and anger, but since they live in a secluded area, I'm somewhat concerned for my safety if we do it at their house.", "summary": "Help my soon to be ex-husband and I break the news of our divorce to his parents in the least devastating way possible."}
{"id": "t3_52ogzp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (37M) daughter (6F) asked me about her mom's (35F) weight gain.", "post": "My wife had always been very thin (5'2\" 100 lbs) with no effort. Despite eating mostly junk food and not exercising, she never put on a pound. Even after having 5 kids, she went right back to size each time without trying.\n\nHowever, in the past year her metabolism has started to catch up with her. She has put on around 60 pounds since last July (2015), at which point she was still 100 pounds. Given her height and frame, she looks very different now. She's made some self-deprecating to me comments about it, so I know it's really bothering her.\n\nEarlier this week, our 6 year old daughter asked me, \"How did mom get so big? Last year she was one of the smallest parents at school, and now she's one of the biggest\". I was taken off guard to be asked this. I started off by making sure she didn't mention this at all to her mom. I then gave an explanation of the importance of eating healthy and exercising. Anything else I should have said? Am I keeping things from wife by not telling her?", "summary": "My wife used to be very skinny. She's gained a lot of weight in the last year. Our daughter asked me about the weight gain, and I'm not sure if any follow-ups are necessary."}
{"id": "t3_4o8aju", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28F] dream about exes frequently, 7 years after marriage, and I wish they would stop.", "post": "I [28F] have frequent dreams about ex-boyfriends, about 3-4 times a week. These dreams are mostly non-sexual and the content is usually just me spending time with them, and feeling deeply in love with them. In the dreams, I am never aware of the existence of my husband [35M]. Some of these exes are people I have not seen or spoken to in over a decade. I have been married for 7 years, and I was hoping that over time the dreams would become less frequent, but they haven't. These dreams only involve ex boyfriends that I was involved with long-term. Some of the relationships ended abruptly or on bad terms. I have never had a dream about my husband.\n\nAfter I have the dreams, I usually wake up feeling very heartbroken and alone. By mid-day, I usually feel better and have moved on from the feelings. The dreams do not happen specifically during stressful times or when my husband and I are having issues; they are entirely random. Even on days when my husband and I are enamored with each other, the dreams can still happen. Most of these exes of mine have moved on with their lives, and are happily married with children. I don't think that contacting my exes would be a good idea, even if it was an issue with closure. I think discussing this with my husband would really hurt him. I feel helpless and ashamed that I can't control these dreams. Is this something others have dealt with regularly, and is there anything that I can do?", "summary": "I have been dreaming of ex-boyfriends from long ago, for over 7 years, and I'm not sure how to control them."}
{"id": "t3_189ojl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[22F] how to handle being ignored on my birthday by [27M]", "post": "Hi all, thanks for reading. \n\nSo I've been casually seeing a guy for about 6 months now. I like him a lot, but its clear that he does not want to pursue a relationship with me. i am okay with that because i'm extremely busy.\n\nAnyway, this past Friday was my birthday. I asked him to hang out with me about a week in advance. He said maybe. I texted him the plan on Wednesday night and he never answered. Then, my birthday arrives, and I don't hear from him. At all. Not even a happy birthday text. He doesn't show up to my bday thing and never even texts to say he won't be there. \n\nI know we aren't boyfriend-girlfriend, but my feelings are really hurt that we have been sleeping together for 6 months (these instances often include taking his dog to the dog park, cooking dinner together, going to art shows, etc) and yet he doesn't respect me enough to even acknowledge my birthday... Even with a polite invite decline... \n\nI don't know how to talk to him about this in a way that conveys how I feel without making it seem like Im being clingy and expected boyfriend treatment from him. I work part time in the same building as him so will probably run into him Monday and am nervous.\n\nDo you guys have any thoughts/advice/insight into why we would act like this?", "summary": "guy I'm seeing casually/FWB said he might come to my birthday thing, then never showed up or even contacted me at all to say happy birthday"}
{"id": "t3_184d6r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (17f) have never gotten jealous before but bf (18m) talks about how hott my bestfriend (17f) is and she wants to work with him on project. For some reason i want to scream.", "post": "I have been going out with my bf for about 9 months and we have previously known and been close friends 3years prior. I've been in relationships and have never gotten jealous about other guys talking about how attractive certain people are. But with the bf I have now he and my other Guy best friend talk about how hott my female bestfriend is and how they would have sex with her if they could or had a chance. I've talked with my bf privately about this seeing if it was just Guy talk but he said if he wasn't going out with me he would date her. And I've talked to her and she finds him attractive and would date him. We have a partner project coming up and she wants to team up with him. I really don't want her to because I'm for some odd reason am boiling up inside and don't want this to happen at all. I don't know what it is but it makes me want to scream. Help me what do I do?", "summary": "boyfriend find best female friend really hott. She finds him attractive. Wants to team up for project. Want to scream."}
{"id": "t3_1g97ka", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Ok so I (M 22) did something stupid and I regret it. But I would like to know your guy's opinion on it.", "post": "So my girlfriend (F 21) has left for a few months. So I won't be able to see her for a pretty long time. We've been together for 10 months now.\n\nOk so my problems start with Facebook. This girl randomly sends me a friend request. We have mutual friends so why not. So she messages me. She just says hi, blah blah blah. Then she asks me to download KIK. I go ahead and do that. The first thing she says is \n\"Hi there cutie :)\" \n\nThat was the first clue that she wanted something else. So we're still chatting. Then she throws this out there, \"are you all alone?\" Then \"do you wanna trade pics?\" I was thinking with my head down there instead of the one up top, and we ended up exchanging pictures. Nude ones. \n\nNow I just don't feel right. I know I shouldn't have done it. I regret it so much. But what I want to know, is do you think that this is cheating? There is no way we'll ever meet up and have sex or anything. They were only pictures. Please tell me what you think.", "summary": "exchanged photos with girl I don't know very well, behind my girlfriend's back. I feel like shit; should it be considered cheating?"}
{"id": "t3_301hmf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Ex [22 M] and I [22 F] had a really bad break-up a year ago. I miss the friendship.", "post": "We were together on and off for 4 years but knew each other much longer. Our relationship was a hit and miss. We both did things that screwed us over and the whole thing was really toxic for the both of us I think. Its been a year since our big no-contact break up and I'm really starting to miss the **friendship**. \n\nI would never be able to date this person again, and I'm sure they feel the same about me, but I really miss hanging out with them or talking to them. Its been a year since we spoke though, I'm confused about why I am suddenly missing the company.\n\nI guess what I want to know is.. After going no contact for a year is it better to just try and forget about this and move on? \n\nAlso; I am in a happy healthy relationship now that makes me feel fulfilled. I don't think this a feeling of being lonely or wanting to rekindle something.. I just feel like I lost a best friend and its hitting me now, for some reason.", "summary": "Extremely bad no-contact break up a year ago. I miss the friendship. Am in a healthy relationship now, not looking to rekindle anything. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4q5azd", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "My last day at the restaurant...", "post": "So, I worked at a restaurant as my second job, after about a month and a half, things were not going as planned. I will spare the details. However, today, I knew I was going to quit, I was just going to wait until the end of my shift.\n\nThat's when the other food runner started acting like a millennial. First, she almost argued with me over the length of deployment in the military. I thought it was always 4 years, apparently to her, it's ALWAYS been 3. \n\nThen, while I'm sitting at the window waiting for food to come out, I hear her yell from the other side, \"If you're not doing anything, clean\"\n\nNow, I've worked in restaurants my whole life, I get the cleaning aspect and I usually am one to clean but I had just wiped down the counter and was talking to a server while waiting for the ticket to come up.\n\nWho does this bitch think she is? \n\nSo finally, I am refilling the ice and a manager comes up to me and goes, \"is everything okay? The food runner said that you are just talking and not working at all, are you good?\"\n\nOh no she didn't.\n\nThat's where I snapped. Calmly though. I was on the schedule to close and she was getting out in about 15 minutes. I went to the office to collect my tips and paychecks for the weeks past. The manager questioned slightly why I was leaving at 1015, I just said I was leaving at 1030 and was going to clock out right after . Our managers do not check schedules at all.  \n\nI collected my tips and checks and walked out. Knowing I left early enough for them to notice and make her stay until close.", "summary": "On my last day of work, I was going to be nice and finish my shift, but my coworker pissed me off so I screwed her over."}
{"id": "t3_4vt1c3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] 2 years, I need help, just got cheated on, things got really complicated, I don't know what to do.", "post": "I have been in my first real relationship for two years now, we started senior year of High School, and carried through freshman year of college sorta long distance (2 hours). Recently she cheated on me, it devastated me. I'm still very much in love with her and a few days after all of this happened, I contacted her to tell her that. She said it was a mistake and she still loves me, but we agreed we couldn't be together right now and we need some time to figure it out. So, we've been in this kinda limbo state ever since. I just don't see a way to move on, even though I know I probably should. Has anyone dealt with a situation similar to this? I need words of advice or just something to make me feel better.", "summary": "Girlfriend cheated, I couldn't be without her, now were still talking and acting somewhat loving towards each other but not in a relationship."}
{"id": "t3_1s0lx0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [31F] mother in law [59F] endangered my daughters [2F] life. Not sure where to go from here.", "post": "My husband (Jason, 32M) and I are highschool sweethearts. We have been together since we were 15 and have always had a great relationship. I get along great with my father in law because my own father died from lung cancer when I was 12. My mother in law, Sherri, however, has always been a little nutty.\n\nShe can be a compulsive liar and is most likely undiagnosed schizophrenia. She talks to herself, laughs to herself, and talks about imaginary people. She's a very sweet woman however and has always been good to me, ever since we met when I was much younger. She even sewed my nothing over-the-top wedding dress when Jason and I got married 4 years ago.\n\nI work as a medical assistant and Jason is a machinist, so my mother watches our daughter, Kayla, Tuesdays through Thursdays, when she doesn't work. Mondays and Fridays, she is with my in laws. My father in law promised to be there while they watched her.\n\nWell yesterday, after work I went to pick Kayla up. As soon as I pulled into their driveway, I noticed my father in laws car was gone. Not a big deal, I though, he is probably just out to get groceries or something. I walk into the house to see all this smoke. My daughter is wailing in her play pen, like screaming at the top of her lungs, and my mother in law is sitting on the couch smoking a joint. I'm not against marijuana at all and I admit to have doing it before, but it was not okay to do it in the same room as my daughter, especially while she's screaming. I asked her what the hell she was doing. I was absolutely livid. She was laughing, high as can be. I collected my daughter and her things and got out as fast as possible. I told my husband when I got home and Kayla kept asking what was wrong with her Mimi. What in the world do I do? I have not accepted her calls because I'm not sure what step to take next.\n\nHelp me!", "summary": "caught my mother in law smoking marijuana in the same room as my two year old daughter while she cried and needed attention. Not share what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1wqb4x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my wife [23 F] together 6 years, and my wife feels like she is living in my shadow.", "post": "Hey everybody, I've been married for my wife for 2 years and dating for over 6. This has been slowly building the last year or so but exploded in the past few days. My wife has told me she feels like I am always the center of attention and that she constantly lives in my shadow. And honestly I 100% agree with her. I am in law school, and all anyone asks about is how I'm doing and how proud they are of me. I do make pretty good grades, but I don't tell people my grades my wife does. \n\nI do not know what to do to make her feel like the center of attention. We have even had to switch churches because at our previous church all people would ask was how law school was going, and they seemed to ignore her. I honestly hate being the center of attention and don't desire it at all. Up until now I've never been the center of attention so I don't know what to do and how to deflect the attention back to her. \n\nI would also love some advice on steps I can do to make her feel like the center of my world. I am thinking about planning a romantic weekend away sometime soon, but I am afraid that if I plan it and surprise her with it, it will still feel like she's just \"tagging along\" since I did all the planning. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Wife feels like I am the center of attention with family and friends and she is right! Looking for ways to deflect the attention to her and make her feel more loved and cared about."}
{"id": "t3_2s2cgt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [15F] am uncertain whether or not to tell my friend [16F] that her boyfriend [16M] is cheating on her with a mutual friend [16F]. Do I keep quiet or break the other friend's trust?", "post": "We are all sophomores in high school. My friend Hannah is dating a boy named Trent, and they have been on and off for almost two years. They have had a few problems but she trusts him a lot and loves him and is considering letting him take her virginity.\n\nMy friend Emma has a friends with benefits thing going on with Trent that started before he and Hannah got together, but neither of them have stopped it ever. I swore to Emma I wouldn't tell anyone, but after hearing Hannah talking about how much she trusted Trent and that they would lose their virginity together and that she knew they were perfect together... How can I hide a fact like that?\n\nI don't know how many people Emma or Trent have told about their deal, but I know it isn't more than five. To be honest, it would probably be blamed on me if people found out.\n\nI am SO much better friends with Hannah than with Emma, but I have many classes with Emma and she is my biology partner. She would definitely hold a grudge.\n\nWhat should I do? Keep quiet and let it take its course or tell Hannah and save her from a douche bag who is lying about virginity and cheating?", "summary": "one of my best friends' boyfriend is cheating on her with my other friend. Do I tell the truth about the bad boyfriend or just keep paws off?"}
{"id": "t3_2kf7a4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [18 M] too depressed now if I know if I like her [19 F] or not.", "post": "First time making any kind of post like this so sorry in advance for rambling. I'm also probably posting in the wrong sub for this so if there's anywhere else I can post this that'd be great.\n\nI've been depressed for a few months now, but my parents bought me the plane ticket to and from Atlanta, Georgia and the Walker Stalker Con last week. Figured as I might as well go since they were paying for it, even though I didn't have a lot of interest for The Walking Dead, which the convention is for.\n\nWe got there, and on the first day waiting in line. Met her, and we eventually made plans to get food. We did so and and had a good time. We've still been texting since then, but I'm so depressed that I'm not 100% sure if I like, as with anything lately. At this point I don't know if I want to pursue a full blown long distance relationship or what.", "summary": "Went on a family trip across country. Met a girl. Went on a date. Both of us enjoyed it. I'm too depressed to know if I should pursue a relationship with her."}
{"id": "t3_hvit7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I've wasted my life in college and I have no friends, how can I change it?", "post": "I'm on summer break from college and I'm entering my senior year, working in the middle of nowhere. I've spent the last two-three years gaming like a fiend.\n\nMost of the people who have made my acquaintance have been batshit (we're talking stabby-stabby stalker level) insane, and I find it very hard to see the good in people who approach me because of that (though I am trying to be more positive about people). I don't know how to strike up a conversation with people (unless it's about computers) and all of the guys who have approached me are just interested in fucking me because of the way I look.\n\nI'd like to expand my interests into something that is more than computers in gaming (sorry nerds, I think you're cool and all, but I don't think that staying with the same kind of people all the time is healthy.) Meetup.com currently only has Japanese Animation Club and something about stay home mothers in my area, so I guess I should start trying to teach myself to be less awkward. Any tips?", "summary": "Female nerd whose life revolves around gaming and computers needs to expand horizons and make friends instead of staying in her room all day."}
{"id": "t3_1q6b56", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21M] What to do for a date this weekend with [21F] friend?", "post": "So I plan on asking this girl out today that I work with. The only thing is, I'm not sure what to do for the date. Essentially, she goes to the college right next to mine (they're pretty close, like sometimes people from her college will go to the bars around here, etc), and I know her from work since we have the same fall internship. I asked her to a date night at my fraternity a couple weeks ago (pumpkin carving and beer) and she came by--we carved a pumpkin, had a few drinks, and generally hit it off before her roommate came by to pick her up. Now I'd like to ask her out for a legit date of some sort, but I'm unsure of what. Dinner seems a bit formal, and since I don't have a car (although I might be able to potentially borrow one to pick her up/drive somewhere) it's hard to think of a place that works transportation wise (unless she drives her car, but that seems kind of lame on my part), plus I suck at thinking of casual date ideas. Help? Thanks!", "summary": "need ideas for a date idea with this girl, have already done one casual thing with her, have no car and she goes to the neighboring college so transportation logistics are annoying."}
{"id": "t3_3pc0yo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21F] Close Friend [19F] is flirting with my GF [19F]", "post": "I've been with my girlfriend (Lucy) for close to ten months now, a little while before we got together our close friend (Alice) admitted to my girlfriend that she had feelings for her. Lucy very politely shut it down because she and I were dating. \n\nAlice has been in and out of several relationships in the time that Lucy and I have been together but she still seems to be flirting with her and it's getting kind of inappropriate. She will touch Lucy's bum or breasts and frequently ask for kisses from her. Lately Alice has been asking to only spend time with my girlfriend and will arrange meeting times around when I am at work.\n \n\nI don't know if I'm being paranoid or if I should approach her. She is a good friend and I enjoy her company, I just don't enjoy watching her come onto my girlfriend every time she's at our house.", "summary": "Close friend has been flirting inappropriately with my girlfriend. I'm not sure how, or if I should approach the situation."}
{"id": "t3_1ueh3l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [29 M] want to ask out a friend [29 F] even though I'm not sure she's into me, is this a bad idea?", "post": "Hey, so there's this girl I've known for a while now. Probably 5 years or so. She's mainly been a friend of a friend, so we never have been super close or anything like that. In the past year or so we've started hanging out occasionally without our mutual friends. The more I've gotten to know her outside of our friends the more I think we'd be a good match. I can barely get a read on her however, my one friend who is usually really perceptive with things like this also has agreed she's tough to read one way or another.\nFor example, New Years we hung out at a bar. I was next to her at midnight and she didn't even look my way to possibly do the midnight kiss. But we ended up leaving at the same time and she walked arm and arm w me to our train and let me put my arm around her and put her head on my shoulder and fell asleep (she was drunk, it was late). Basically, my question is this, with no real inclination of whether or not this girl is into me would I be making a dumb move by asking her out given our mutual friend circles, could be awkward as hell for all parties involved if I put that out there if she wasn't into it. Also while I'm at it, I've never asked out a long time friend so any stories/advice there would be appreciated as well.\nI'm aware I sound like a wuss, it's probably because I haven't like a girl this much in like 5 years. That's probably half (or more) of the problems I'm having.", "summary": "Developed crush on long time friend, not sure if mutual, fear creating a weird dynamic if it isn't. Should I go for it anyway?"}
{"id": "t3_254dlk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He [24M] just messaged me [24F] out of the blue to hang out, but he knows I'm not interested in casual sex?", "post": "- By \"out of the blue\" I mean a month.\n\n- I've been out with this guy once before. It went okay, but relative to my other experiences, it was a pretty mediocre date. We have similar personalities (confident, stubborn) I think, which explains why neither of us showed any vulnerability that day. There was no talk of meeting up again at the end of the date because we established that I'm not into casual sex, whereas he is really enjoying his bachelor lifestyle.    Now if you're asking why we bothered going on the date at all, my answer is that I didn't know he was a bachelor before I went. He must have thought I was open to the idea of going back to his house after the date. \n\nCurrent situation:\n\n- After a month of no contact, he's asked me to go see a local gig with him, and there's nothing to suggest that it's going to be a group thing. So my question is, does this look like a second attempt to get laid, or do you think he's just feeling the waters for compatibility/whatever? \n\n- I've read elsewhere that guys like to keep multiple girls on the backburner and get in touch when they're bored/horny/both, because they know that they'll likely get a positive response. But I'm clearly not someone who would respond to a booty call. This is why I'm asking for your advice reddit!", "summary": "One our first date, we established that things wouldn't work out because he is only looking for casual flings. One month later, why has he suddenly asked me out?"}
{"id": "t3_4xlh8q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Seems to be going almost too well with me [23m] and her [21f], should I be worried about too much of a good thing?", "post": "I [23m] met her [21f] through tinder, and we grabbed coffee about a week and a half ago.  We hit it off really, really well - the kind of immediate 'clicking' I haven't really experienced since high school - and we've hung out FOUR times since then.\n\nWe've talked a bit about where this is heading, and we're on the same page - it's kind of unspokenly exclusive already, with the definite expectation of dating for a while.  We had talked about waiting on sleeping together for a couple weeks, but I saw her today and it just sort of happened.  There's just a level of chemistry here I'm frankly not used to at all.\n\nI guess my concern is that if things are getting good so fast, will they fade away just as quickly?  Should I be pacing out seeing her so often?  We have plans on Monday again already, but after that we won't see each other for a couple weeks - I'm heading out of state, and then she is too the day I get back.  In the early stages of dating, is seeing someone this often a bad thing?", "summary": "seeing a girl for less than two weeks, things have moved very fast, should I try to slow it down so we don't 'burn out' from each other?"}
{"id": "t3_4ugxk0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I lost my GF [21F] trust how do I fix it [21M]", "post": "I have the most making girlfriend ever and unfortunately she wants to break up with me.  I know else loves me so much but unfortunately I lied about my past. She asked me on the third date when I lost my virginity and the true answer is 21 but I thought in the back of my mind this amazing girl will find that pathetic so I stupidly said 19. I knew this would come back to haunt me. \n\nShe has severe result issues after going through a tough time in her life and I don't know what to do. She made me promise once we became a couple to always be honest with her but I knew that I had to hide this as it meant that I only just lost my virginity and I'd recently found out she was a virgin so she would be sad that I couldn't share this experience with her. \n\nSo I held onto this lie but it was eating me up inside until today when she asked about it I is it blurted it out. I've been an absolute idiot and now she thinks she can never trust me again. What can I do to get her back? She's absolutely perfect in my eyes and and couldn't bare to lose her?", "summary": "lied to my girlfriend about a stupid thing because I thought she would think I was pathetic, dug myself in a whole now I'm falling though it"}
{"id": "t3_z47p7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] just want him to open up more and a little more affection. He says that he's [27M] a bad boyfriend.", "post": "I don't know what to do. We've been together for a year and a half but we've had the same problems over and over. Whenever I try to talk about our issues, calmly or not so much, he always closes up and says he's a bad boyfriend and that he's sorry for ruining my life and just other stuff like that, that makes me feel depressed. He's been married and obviously divorced, and cheated on his wife (which I found out feom a friend) with one other girl who eventually cheated on him, and he has trust issues. Which I understand but day after day while I'm away at college, he always says that he's sure I'll replace him soon and that I'm probably thinking about it. I've been nothing but faithful and I've tried to be understanding when he says that stuff but it hurts that he even thinks that, even after everything we've been through. I feel like he is still so emotionally scarred and just so withdrawn within his pain that I won't be able to get him to open up. I just want to be with him, that's all. But it's hard when he says these things and makes me feel terrible about myself and our relationship.", "summary": "I want him to stop accusing me of replacing him and start realizing I'm staying and not going anywhere. And a little more affection would be nice too."}
{"id": "t3_1qunf3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] ex boyfriend [21M] won't stop contacting me", "post": "6 months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. I reluctantly agreed to try and stay friends. \n\nThe problem was that the only thing he wanted to talk about was our relationship, and all he did was blame me and guilt trip me. I told him I couldn't handle that and that I didn't think we should be friends. He got really angry, told me that \"I guess we just shouldn't talk anymore.\" He blocked me on social media and stopped contacting me. I thought that was the end. \n\nA week later, he texted and asked me why I was giving him the cold shoulder. I was confused. I told him we agreed to stop talking and I was sticking with it. For the next 3 months, he continued to send me texts and leave me voicemails. I made the mistake of responding to one of them, which only led to more and more texts full of things like \"I miss my best friend,\" \"How could you do this to me?\", and even \"Just tell me you want me to die and I'll stop bothering you.\"\n\nI learned to ignore everything he sent. Then he started texting some of my close friends, trying to ask them what they knew about me. My friends are smart and they told him they didn't know anything and that it was really none of their business anyway.\n\nWhen I came back to campus in September (we go to the same college), he continued texting and calling, and approached me one time. Then he finally stopped. I thought it was over. Today he sent me a message through FB (I had unblocked him because I thought it was over).\n\nHe wants to \"have a chat\" with me, which I assume means that he wants to continue this harassment in person. It's been 6 months. How do I get this guy to leave me alone? Why doesn't he get it? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "My ex won't stop trying to get me to talk to him even though we broke up 6 months ago; any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2iuroy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (20M) girlfriend (25F) of 3 months thinks I don't care about her", "post": "Things were great until she got her overnight job. She used to be smiling and happy all the time and now she's...not. She's stressed, doesn't get much sleep, and the only day I'm able to come up is Sunday and she sleeps most of the day. So we cuddle for awhile until she has to get ready for work again.\n\nNow, I would do absolutely anything for this woman. Even though I don't particularly like her job, I support her decision to work there and I encourage her. I let her know everyday I love her and find her beautiful and perfect in every way, yet now she says she thinks I don't care.\n\nI have no idea what to tell her, and I can't go over unil Sunday to talk about it because of both our work schedules. I can't prove I love her....but I need to. I can't lose her, and I think it's just the stress of this job that's making her like this. No idea what to do.", "summary": "my gf thinks I don't care even though I would do anything for her. Not sure how to show her I do"}
{"id": "t3_v3qw2", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Hey Reddit, I think the dumbest crook ever broke into my car last night", "post": "About 9:00 last night, sitting in my usual spot watching some TV with the wife and about to fire up a game. All of a sudden we hear a short horn honk, sounds really close, as in it came from one of our cars parked in the driveway. I throw everything on the floor and run to the window and see someone running across my yard away from our cars. I grab my keys and run outside and this guy is next door and looks back over his shoulder at me and hauls ass. I go check out my car and sure enough, every compartment is open and shit is everywhere. \n\nI get in and take out after him. Knowing the shitty apartments nearby, I figure that's the best direction to head. Turn a couple of corners and I see him hop a fence into a gated apartment complex. This whole time I'm on the phone with a 911 dispatcher giving them information. I pull up to the fence where he jumped it and hit my bright lights, he's gone and there's no way for me to continue the chase. \n\nTwo hours later the cops show up and take all my information and file a report. Fast forward to this morning as I'm driving to work. I look into my neighbors yard where the guy was. There's a huge culvert that runs through their front yard, kind of a dry creek. On the bank of that is a white shirt. I call my wife and she goes out to check it out and also sees an ID card laying there for some trade school. \n\nSo I call the cops to let them know about these items. They sent a unit by. Cop starts looking around and comes across the guys social security card, a few seconds later he finds his drivers license. At this point, I'm fairly certain the crook didn't know the culvert was there and he took a header, went flying and dropped his shit. Cop runs a background check on the guy and he has a record a mile long, mainly for burglary. Picture on the ID match my description perfectly.", "summary": "Thief goes into my car, honks horn, drops clothing and all his ID running away. I'm out a pair of sunglasses."}
{"id": "t3_nosou", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Ever started to have feelings for someone you know you shouldn't have feelings for?", "post": "Recently I've been talking a lot to this girl who hasn't had the best of lives. She turned to drugs and alcohol, slept with a number of guys and has some mental issues. She seems nice enough, and she's not a total fuck up. She cares about her future and does well in school. Personally, I drink probably a touch more than I should but that's it. I do well in school, am still a virgin and have never done drugs (even weed, nothing against it, just haven't really had the opportunity). I'm trying to get a job that requires me being clean and have a pretty non-fucked up life. Yet this girl is always on the back of my mind. I really do care about her and want to get to know her better but I feel she could interrupt my future if I pursue her. What do I do?", "summary": "Girl I'm starting to like is a bit of a fuck up and might interrupt my future. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1wlida", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Landlord potentially acting in bad faith. Clarification needed", "post": "Texas.\n\nSo in my drawn out saga with my former landlord:\n\nI received an itemized statement today (1 day past the 30 day mark required in Texas) and there are some charges that I do not think should be there.\n\nI have listed out what the statement says:\n\nStatement date: 1/13/2014\n\nDeposit...................................................$1000\n\nCleaning interior of house, wall restoration\n\nand painting to bedroom 2........................-250\n\nCarpet Solutions- Cleaned Carpets, Pet\n\nTreatment/deodorize..............................-127.74\n\nAtmos Energy 8 Days.............................-30.48\n\nLP&L 12 Days @ 2.68/day.......................-32.11\n\n**Light Bulbs, Batteries, Swiffer Sweeper....-46.94**\n\n**Lubbock County Court Cost....................-289.00**\n\n**Yard Cleanup and Maintenance...............-65.00**\n\nThe ones in bold are the ones I disagree with. My question is about the court cost though. If this is improperly done does he forfeit the right to deduct anything. The court case was dropped. We (LL and I) agreed that we would leave.\n\nAlso the Light Bulbs and batteries are standard wear and tear. The swiffer was a gift. I even posted in here about how I thought it was sexist.\n\nI understand the Atmos and LP&L charges. We scheduled the shutoff for the 20th thinking we would be out by then but we were not out until the 29th. \n\nAlso the \"wall restoration\" is from where we had mounted a LCD monitor. There were a total of 4 screw holes less than 1/4th inch in diameter.\n\nAlso, we returned the keys on the 30th of December and received our \"deposit\" back on the 30th of January. It was mailed on the 29th of January. The day it was due back. \n\nWe have pictures of the condition that we left the house in. It was in great condition. \n\nSo my question is:", "summary": "If any charge on a security deposit is inaccurate does that void the entire return of the security deposit entitling me to the full deposit? If the deposit was received back 1 day late does that entitle me to the full deposit?"}
{"id": "t3_sdvoc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, how can I go about finding my brother?", "post": "My older brother is 7 years older than me, and stayed in our hometown when our family moved as he finished high school. He never went into college, instead he decided to go with a buddy to Alaska and work on fishing vessels for months at a time. We kept in touch every 6 months or so, and he even made the trip cross country to see us for a Thanksgiving in 2005 or so, but he had plans to go back fishing for a season or two and then move to California. \n\nWe haven't heard from him since. We've moved again since then (although a google search for my dad is the first hit) so it could be possible that he couldn't find us, but I don't know. He was never contractually obliged to any fishing company and he sailed out in a few different ports, so inquiring there has been less than helpful. He's originally from My. Vernon, Washington and sailed on fishing vessels specializing in tuna and salmon. He was a cook on the ship. That's all I know for sure.\n\nAre there any resources that are out there for this sort of thing? I don't want to call the police because I don't know if he's missing or what, and there's nothing illegal going on and I don't want to waste anyone's time. I've just realized that I never really knew the guy because of our age difference and I would really, really like to talk to him.", "summary": "Haven't heard from my brother in 7ish years, don't know where to start looking. Are there any good resources that are dependable?"}
{"id": "t3_3yt7ph", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU because of Kobe Bryant", "post": "This happened last night, didn't realize it was a FU until a few mins ago:\n\nI was playing 2K15 on my gaming desktop PC. I am the home team (Lakers, of course), and am down by 2 with 2.5 seconds left and have the ball. I take the ball out of bounds and pass it to Kobe who was wide open standing at the 3point line. I shoot, the shot meter was almost perfect, just not quite, and the ball hits the front of the rim and I lose the game... Without thinking about it I kick my desk hard as hell, and everything just shakes, my speakers fell down, and the game freezes. Im too pissed so I just force shutdown and go to bed.\n\nNow I have to do some very important, design-intensive work and come to realize that my GPU is dead and my pc will only boot with the integrated one, which is not powerful enough to work with.", "summary": "Kobe missed a game-winning shot and made me mad enough to kick the life out of my PC. Thanks a lot, Kobe Bryant."}
{"id": "t3_3703ln", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "NSFW : TIFU by beating my girlfriend", "post": "Unlike most stories on this sub, this actually happened today. \n\nGiven that me and my girlfriend had an empty house, we decided to engage in some rougher-and-louder than usual sex. By rougher, I mean we had discussed face slapping and choking and the like. So during, I started going to town - basically slapping the shit out of my girlfriends face. \n\nThe more I did it, the more into it she seemed to be and as a result the more I did it. It was a vicious cycle. \n\nAnyway, after finishing up and engaging in some post-coitus snuggling I noticed that the area had bruised slightly. Slightly became more noticeably, which became a large bruised area and a blackened eye. This is obviously a pretty big problem, however the real piss-icing on this shit-cake is that tomorrow evening we have a barbecue with her family. \n\nOh I forgot to mention, afterwards both of us revealed that neither of us are actually into the face slapping. She was into how into it I was, and I was into how into it she was. So this entire experience has been for naught.", "summary": "Slapped gf during sex. Big-ass bruise. Family Barbecue tomorrow. Probably going to look like a gf-beater."}
{"id": "t3_2yzj7t", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by forgetting to flush", "post": "So today, about noon, I'm at my girlfriend's house (we're seniors in high school by the way). About this time my bowels start to rumble, as is daily ritual. I'm pretty comfortable at her house so I have no issue shitting there. Usually I use a bathroom connected to the guestroom, which is rather secluded from the rest of the house so as to not hot box the whole family. Today, however, her sister was home from college and napping in the guestroom, so I was forced into \"the outhouse\", a little used, lock-less bathroom barely big enough to fit a toilet in, which just so happens to be next to the main communal area of the house. \n\nNow I'm in the bathroom, and in the process of unleashing a hellacious megladon of a shit into the basin below. Full disclosure, this thing probably had the girth of a large ferret. Anyways, afterwords I'm sitting on the toilet surfing Reddit for much longer than is socially acceptable. Enough time goes by that my girlfriend is annoyed and hungry enough to fling open the door to find me surfing the interwebs. In a hurried panic I wash my hands and swiftly exit The Outhouse, sans flushing.\n\nFast forward a half hour and we're eating lunch at Costco because $1.50 for a hot dog and soda is an unbeatable deal. All of a sudden she gets a text from her mom, \"Did someone use The Outhouse?\". As she reads me the text, it hits me that I have just left a massive turd burger marinating in piss for a half hour in the middle of their home. My girlfriend sees the look of horror on my face and immediately starts to figuratively lose her shit in the middle of Costco. She quickly relays to her mom who the culprit was and just how embarrassed I am. A couple minutes pass and this text comes back: \"No.. it's fine, it's just that he should really get checked out. That couldn't have been healthy\".\n\nI have now resolved to never set foot in their household again.", "summary": "Took massive shit in gf's house, forgot to flush. Her mom found it, thinks I have gastrointestional problems."}
{"id": "t3_3vswiv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22 M] ex left me [21 F] after 11 months, said he was too young, got with his ex who has a baby", "post": "So basically after 11 months of an amazing relationship, my now ex boyfriend, has decided he isn't old enough for anything serious, and I was fine with that. We agreed to be friends and we would see if we could pick it up again in a few months, kind of like a break. \n\nWe've both been having stressful times at work so I thought he may just need to clear his head a bit. We'd been talking like we normally would, not much had changed besides the romance and we were both missing each other. But last Monday he was out with his friends and I got a text message that said \"I'm sorry I have to be honest, there's someone else.\" Obviously I was pretty distraught that he'd get over it all so quickly, I wondered why I wasn't good enough and I've thought about it all so much. \n\nAfter completely breaking up with me I've found out he is now with his ex girlfriend who has recently had a baby, I'm struggling to add it all up really. I'm hurt that he couldn't be with me but he feels he can handle the responsibility of a new born child. What makes it even stranger is the fact he told me numerous times that he dislikes this girl a fair bit. \n\nI'm not sure how to feel about the whole thing if I'm honest. I still have extremely strong feelings for him and I don't know if this is all a mistake on his part. I've been on a date to try forget about it but it didn't feel right, I don't know if I should wait for him to explain it all properly before I move on. \n\n*side note: I'm not sure if it's worth mentioning but he saved me from an abusive relationship and I feel like I owe him a lot for that, he made me trust someone again and I'm worried it'll damage me letting go of him.*\n\nI'm sorry if this seem all over the place, I'm just not with it at all, I just need someone to hear me out right now", "summary": "boyfriend wasn't ready for anything serious, has now taken on a new born child, I don't know how to react"}
{"id": "t3_2pcadc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [m/16] looked into my best friend's [f/16] eyes at a party and my heart dropped because I never fully expressed all my feelings for her", "post": "I know I'm young and I have a lot to learn about relationships and love entirely, but I know her for about 12 years. I really do have feelings for her. \n\nGot really close to and at a party we were just chilling so now one or two friends are asking me what are we...and honestly I can't say myself\n\nIt feels like I'm in the friend-zone, but I don't want to classify what we have between us as something so shallow..,because at times it feels like we're a couple(to me, but I tend to over analyze things a lot) . \n\nThis post is mainly because recently she talks to me a little....different than she usually does (playful ily's, kiss emojis) \n\nWhat should I do? And what you think I should do, should it be in person or text?", "summary": "Girl, like here, 'friendzone phase', the point where it feels like more than that, what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2sz27u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] hooked up with a girl [19 F] at a party and want to ask her out. Any advice is greatly appreciated!", "post": "So this past Friday I was at a college party and met a beautiful girl and started chatting her up. We talked for a little while then we started dancing and eventually the dancing led to making out on the dancefloor. This went on for over an hour and it was the most fun I've had a party in a long time. When the party started to wind down, I walked her back to her room, got her number, and kissed her goodbye. \n\nIt's been three days since then and I haven't had any contact with her. I would love to up and ask her out on a date but I'm not exactly sure what medium to use or how exactly to phrase it. I think texting her \"Hey I had a lot of fun on Friday. Would you like to get dinner some time?\" could come off as standoffish.\n\nI go to a big school and don't see this girl at all throughout the course of my usual day. Any advice on where I should go from here would be fantastic. Thanks y'all!", "summary": "Hooked up with a girl at a party a few days ago and haven't talked to her since. I want to initiate a sober rendez-vous for the first time but I'm not exactly sure how to go about it."}
{"id": "t3_4jeyig", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [39F] found out my daughter [16F] doesn't want to go to college. Thinking of putting her out, but I'm not sure on any of this..", "post": "Decided to seek out some second opinions before I make any big decisions. I'm not exactly in my right mind at the moment.\n\nMy daughter use to always talk to me about the colleges and the different states she wanted to move to when she graduated high school. Her job choices has changed quite a lot throughout the years, but she always has wanted to work in the medical field. Right now she is finishing up her sophomore year, and next year is when her school tries to get them to look/apply for colleges. We were having a talk earlier about her grades, she use to always do well in school, but now it seems as if her grades are slipping. She kept on trying to change the subject and shoo me off, and long story short, we got into an argument. I told her that if she didn't get her grades up no college would want her, and she replied by yelling at me that she doesn't even know if she wants to go to college anymore. I thought she was kidding but she looked as if she was pretty serious. \n\nShe told me that she's been thinking about it for awhile, and she doesn't think she wants to \"waste away\" her years studying for another 4 or more years for something that she may become bored of eventually. My reaction might not of been the best, I always imagined her going to college and becoming successful in the medical field like she always dreamed about. I took away her phone and sent her to her room, but now I feel like I made a mistake. I just don't want to see her grow up and struggle like so many people are doing now, but I also know I cant really force her to go to college either. \n\nI don't know what to do, apart of me is angry and doesn't really want anything else to do with her. I'm very disappointed and just confused on how to handle this...particularly with my own thoughts and accepting this.", "summary": "Daughter told me she doesn't want to go to college, I'm extremely upset with her and want to make her go, but know I can't. Don't know what to make of all this."}
{"id": "t3_1dl5u4", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Alright /r/jobs, do me a solid and prepare me for the worst.", "post": "I'll start this off with the worst part that has proved to be the most damning - I have a Misdemeanor Theft II on my record in Oregon from 2009. \n\nTo be honest, that instance completely changed my train of thought and goals. I was a pre-kinesiology major at the time and, after going through my conviction, transferred colleges and graduated with a Sociology degree focusing on Crime and Juvenile Delinquency. I graduated in 2011, and worked at a \"stepping-stone\" job until I was recently laid-off because of the lack of work. \n\nWell, TOMORROW I have a group interview with the State of Oregon's Department of Child Protective Services. I can tell you how qualified I am for this entry-level position but, to be honest, I can't stop thinking about how shitty it looks to have a Theft II Misdemeanor on my record. \n\nI've really turned my life around since 2009, have absolutely no drug history, and have chosen to go into a career field where I have the opportunity to make an impact on at-risk youth who may need to see that, even with a criminal record, you CAN be successful. \n\nI'd appreciate anyone with a related history or advice to chime in. I've never had a group interview before and have no idea what to expect.", "summary": "I have a criminal record from 4 years ago, but I'll be damned if I let that get in my way tomorrow."}
{"id": "t3_26oy01", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 F] caught my BF [29 M] of 1,5 yrs telling a girl that we broke up (we have not)", "post": "Before I start, sorry about the language. Mobile phone user and not a native speaker.\n\nOkay, so here is what happened. My BF and I got into a fight while being drunk, about something stupid. After we got home he FB chatted this girl he used to work with (he initiated it), telling her she was beautiful etc. She answered him in a similar fashion, but told him that it she thought is was too bad that he had a girlfriend. My BF then told her that we had broken up that very night, and that he wanted to meet her.\n\nI saw the conversation the next morning, bc he left his Facebook open. I confronted it with him, and he apologised and explained himself (he ran into this girl at the bar we were that night) before accusing me of not \"trusting him enough\". I feel like he could have done some more explaining to help me understand why he did it (he said it was bc he was so angry with me) and convince me that I am the only girl for him. With permission, I read their entire facebook-chat, and they had not talked for months, and it was just work stuff. \n\nShould I forgive him?\nI keep thinking about it and I am super snappy towards him about everything. Usually I am very confident, but now I am more insecure than ever.", "summary": "Cought my BF chatting with a girl telling her how we broke up, that he thinks she is beautiful and wants to meet her. Should I forgive him?"}
{"id": "t3_1bpqux", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Found out my boyfriend thinks many of his female friends are hotter than me, now I'm totally not turned on by him anymore.", "post": "My boyfriend is a giant flirt.  I used to think he thought I was attractive and sexy, and was completely ok with this because as long as he is attracted to me why should I care?  I was bad, and came across a conversation he had with his brother one night online, saw my name, and read it.  \nHe basically sized up a bunch of his female friends and discussed how hot they were. No big deal until his brother told him he should \"upgrade\", \nNow it's in my head and I can't stop thinking about it.  I can't ever get turned on, knowing how mediocre I am and thinking that's what's going through his head.\n\nI'm not overweight, I guess it must be my face....commence thoughts spiraling out of control about what' wrong with it.\n\nhow do I get over this?\nI know my boyfriend must at least think I'm decent since he is dating me, I'm not blaming him or anything.  It's just not sexy to know you're ranked bottom of the barrel.", "summary": "I found out my boyfriend does not think I'm very attractive, but thinks many of his female friends are extremely hot. Trying not to be shallow but it's a huge turn off."}
{"id": "t3_1thopa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my girlfriend [21F] of 4 years, I keep wondering if I'm gay and don't know what to do?", "post": "I have always been confused since I was 13. I would usually watch gay porn mostly, but also watched straight.\n\nI would have a crush on girls or guys, but girls I felt more emotional about, guys more physical. Sometimes though I feel like I forced myself to crush on girls because that's what I wanted, but I really don't know.\n\nI was almost ready to just say I'm gay and be done with the confusion, but I met this girl and fell in love with her.\n\nShes my best friend and I love her, its just physically I don't know what it is I like.\n\nWe have sex, I get hard, everything goes fine just like you would expect. I just feel sometimes like I would like a male more, but I can still do everything and like it with a female.\n\nSometimes I feel like the only reason I get aroused during the sex is because it feels good, and the fact shes female just doesn't effect me.\n\nI have arguments in my head back and forth and don't know what to think?", "summary": "I think I might be gay, I sometimes feel like I rather have a guy, but I am in love with a girl, and we have sex fine, I just don't know what I want."}
{"id": "t3_1s15yu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] and my ex [23 F] and how to deal with this kind of break up.", "post": "I've been with Mary, of course this isn't her real name, for almost 9 months. Near mid November, she recently went back on anti-depressants. She said that she's feeling stressed out from work, school, and \"other stuff\" (which I assumed to be me even though she said it was't. Now she hasn't felt this way, she told me, since she things went sour with her highschool sweetheart, about 6-7 years ago. That was when she first got on antidepressants. \n\nI am also depressed, but I think I've allowed myself to be depressed because I focused so much on making her happy that I forgot about me. I have made an appointment to see a psychologist this Friday because I believe I have deeper issues that I need to work on. With me being depressed, she feels as if she has a burden or feels like I'm pressuring her to fix me. That freaked her out and scared her away. I kept asking her to hold me and take me away from this place, and that's what led her to feel that way.\n\nSo she broke up with me today because she said she needed time to fix herself. She said that she doesn't want to give me any false hopes that we will get back together or not, but by saying that, I'm kinda strung on the hope that we will get back together. At least, once both of us are solid, good, happy, and \"fixed\". I know that I could use this time as a great opportunity to get better. Except the problem right now is that I keep thinking that I want to get better so that I can get back with her. I want to learn how to get better because... I simply want to get better for own well being. I know that I have to let her go to do this if I really do love her. I can't be selfish and keep her around when she needs time for herself.\n\nI guess, I don't really know what kind of advice I'm looking for. I know there's no definite answer as to if we are going to get back together or not. Maybe I'm just looking for positive feedback.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I are depressed. She is on antidepressants. She broke up, wanting time to fix herself. I'm hurting because I don't want to break up and I want to get back together."}
{"id": "t3_4jgher", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28 F] have scars that won't go away from a botched nose job, and I'm scared my crush [30 M] won't love me.", "post": "My crush knows of my nose job from the grapevine. I just got my nose done around 7 years ago. He has seen my nose, and even though it is aesthetically pleasing from the front, I have deep scars along one of my nostrils. I don't want to do a revision because the nose job looks good except for the scars. I have been using retin-a like crazy to try to lessen the scars which have worked, but I don't know if I will ever get rid of my scars completely and I don't know how long it will take.\n\nI never consulted my crush about my nose job and it seemed like he liked me before my nose job. I really don't know what to do. I really regret to some extent getting my nose done because I still looked OK without it. I just wanted to touch it up a bit because I didn't like how my nostrils flared when I smiled. After using the retin-a the scars are only visible under certain lighting and at certain angles.\n\nI can't stand the scars and they have been taking over my life ever since I got my nose done. I'm scared that I look vain and superficial and that my crush won't love me because of this. I rarely make the time to be near my crush because I'm embarrassed of even getting a nose job in the first place because it was poorly executed. \n\nIf my crush ever gets fat I know I'd still love him. I feel like he knows about the scars and still cares for me anyway but it's my insecurity that's eating me up and telling me that he shouldn't love me because these scars have made me have to constantly be around a mirror 24/7. It's vain. It's a bad personality trait on top of the scars. I don't know what to do. I feel like I easily get self conscious and angry about the scars. I'm just hoping that the retin-a will fill up my scars.", "summary": "I'm scared that my crush will get tired of my new self conscious personality because of the scars from my nose job 7 years ago. I'm in the middle of trying to fix my scars."}
{"id": "t3_3mzp71", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[update] I went bald at a very young age and now resent everyone, especially women", "post": "original: \n\nAfter battling something (I don't know if it's depression or not)for the past 10+ years, I've finally decided to cave and see a therapist.  My mental health is very obviously getting worse and it's getting harder and harder to fool myself.  Going bald and being lonely is a large part of it but I can't continue like this.  With my mental health deteriorating, it has started to affect me physically.  I have small injuries that are not healing, I have chronic pain, and I'm sure a lot of it is mental\n\nI was always under the impression that finding a nice job would help at least a little bit. Well I went from being unemployed at 26 to making $80k now at 29 and things are worse than ever.  I feel like finding a girlfriend and getting regular intimacy will help me a lot but who knows, it's impossible to find someone at my current state.\n\nSo my question is, how do I go about finding someone?  Therapy is seen as faux pas in my culture so I have to do this on the downlow (especially since I've fooled everyone into thinking I'm this confident guy who has his shit together)\n\nSorry if this is all over the place", "summary": "caved after 10 years of misery and looking for therapist in LA area, no idea how to go about it and am pretty scared about it"}
{"id": "t3_429xkx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can i convince my friend (M23) to text a girl (22) he likes?", "post": "Hey guys my friend and I are in a debate about this girl and we thought we'd ask Reddit for your opinion. Basically my friend met this girl over summer in community college and he's liked her ever since. Since they go to different universities they have had close to no communication for four months. \n\nFast forward to now my friend has since graduated and has been texting her to try to hang out and she has agreed, but haven't been able to settle on a day and time that works for both of them. My friend said that she is probably not interested and is only trying to be nice while I told him she is just busy. They live about 30 mins from each other now compared to 4 hours from before so meeting up now would not be that difficult. \n\nI told him to message her again anyways as a last glimmer of hope. What say you, Reddit? Should he bother continuing to try to hang out with her or give up now?", "summary": "my friend likes a girl that lived far from him so they couldn't hang out before. Now he's closer and wants to get to know her but she may or may not still be interested."}
{"id": "t3_32gh6o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] and my best friend [19 F] that I've known since August, really like each other but...", "post": "... she's afraid that something will go wrong in the future and make things awkward between us.\n\n**The Story**:\nSo we have been best friends for some time now, as we live in the same building and practically spend all of our time in the other person's apartment. Before this we had never even had a romantic conversation. Well, Friday night we got drunk and started making out, a lot. We slowed down for a bit to talk about it, and found out that we both really like each other, and have for at least a few weeks. We went back to making out and between everything she pulled away, made eye contact with me, and said, \"I *really* like you.\"\n\nShe then said that she didn't want to take it any farther because she's worried that it would make things awkward between us. She has lost some friends in the past due to a similar situation (but the guy was an asshole; when they broke up he said a ton of shit to try and make her insecure). So we decided to just continue making out for a while, until we got tired and wanted to go to bed.\n\nSo the next morning she came right back up to my room, and we smoked and talked about it. When I asked her if she still liked me when she was sober, she said, \"I don't know. I mean, yes, but what if something happens and it get's awkward? We have such a great friendship and I wouldn't us to stop talking because something goes wrong.\" \n\nI completely agree, we have been great friends for longer than we have liked each other, and all of our friends are mutual. The only place where I disagree is that I don't think that we'll stop talking if something goes wrong. I mean, sure, there's a chance, but I have good relationships with all three of my exes.\n\nAnyway, this conversation went on for just a little bit, but we never really landed on a decision, we just haven't brought it back up since then. What do I do? I can't stop thinking about this.", "summary": "My best friend and I really like each other, but she is afraid that if we break up we won't have a friendship afterwards. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_bheee", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I Need a Handbook for Life", "post": "Reddit, I was brought up extremely sheltered by my parents. Basically, all household responsibilities/duties were handled by them, and the only thing I was expected to do was study. Now that I'm moving out, I have no clue how to function on my own. So basically, I'm looking for a handbook for life, all the way from applying for auto insurance to managing bank accounts, paying bills and filing taxes. I have learned some of these things, but what would be great is a consolidated list of what I need to know/be able to do to function on my own. Any and all advice would be appreciated!", "summary": "I need a list of things I should be able to do to live completely on my own. Directions to complete tasks would be an added bonus. All advice/stories are more than welcome!"}
{"id": "t3_3hgjkf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] with my Friend [23M], His Girlfriend [22F] And A Bunch Of Our Friends Revealing A Secret.", "post": "So I've got a friend, we'll call him Jim. Jim has been dating his Girlfriend, we'll call her Sam, for about 2 years now or so. But before this, Sam and I used to fool around. Sam has also fooled around with 4 of our other friends, so including me that makes 5. \n\nHere's where it gets complicated; Jim doesn't know. A good question would be why we didn't tell him. Well I did. Or least I tried to.  The reason I didn't just blurt it out was because when he told me he was interested in Sam, he seemed like he genuinely really liked her so I wanted to tell him as gently as possible but he shut me down and gave a really cocky and arrogant response so I dropped it. We wrestled with whether or not to tell him because we didn't want it to seem like we were jealous or being petty. And I've asked Jim and he said he thinks she's the one and he'll pop the question one day.\n\nNow Sam has been known to tell lies to try and come between our circle of friends. She told a lie about two of our friends, Michael and Ryan. She also lied that Michael and I were fighting over her. Now she's told another lie. She told Jim that our friend, Paul, slept with Ryan's ex girlfriend which is hilariously untrue.\n\nNow Paul is absolutely fuming and says he's going to confront Jim with this and he's going to tell Jim about Sam's history with the 5 of us.\n\nMy question is, what should I do? What's the best course of action here?", "summary": "Jim's girlfriend Sam has a history with 5 of us. Jim doesn't know but now he might find out. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_1ewxz6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He[22] doesn't seem interested at all in having sex, whereas I[20] am, but sometimes I find...", "post": "About five months ago this really wonderful boy asked me to be his girlfriend. I absolutely adore him, and he's the best possible match I could ask for as far as who I am at the moment. It's especially really convenient that we're in the same profession, because we're both ferociously busy and don't have a lot of free time. This means we're both really understanding when we can't devote as much time as we would like to each other.\n\nThe thing is, I'm extremely attracted to him because I like him so much. (That's how my libido works. Otherwise, it's virtually zero.) He tells me I'm beautiful occasionally, and when we were first starting to fool around he used to instigate naughty activities, but now he doesn't seem interested at all.\n\nI'm always the one who initiates any kind of sex related activity, and really I'm lucky if I can get anything to happen. Most of the time it's just me going down and that's the end of it. We have slept together once, but otherwise nothing really. I asked him once about his libido when he was falling asleep, because I couldn't work up the courage to do it otherwise, and he said he guessed it wasn't very strong because he was tired and stressed all the time-- which I could see.\n\nBut now it's summer, and he is getting plenty of sleep and isn't nearly as stressed as he usually is and still doesn't seem interested. The thing is, I know he does things by himself because occasionally when I use his phone to take a picture I'll see some kind of dirty picture he'd saved recently in the little gallery preview icon on the phone, only to ask to play on his phone later to find it deleted. (I don't go through his phone without permission, mind you! I also don't care that he looks at porn, haha. If you're male, I just assume you look at porn.)", "summary": "He seems interested in sex, but not sex with me? I feel like I should talk to him but I don't know what to say or even what the problem is really."}
{"id": "t3_4lqfwk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How should I[17/M] tell her[17/F] that I don't want to go to prom with her?", "post": "I've been having some trouble with my girlfriend, we'll call her Pam. I was talking to another female friend of mine, we'll call her Kate, about my problems. I told Kate it didn't look like Pam and I would be going to prom, because we were having a disagreement. Kate decided it would be appropriate to invite herself to be my date to prom. Now, Pam and Kate are friends and they go to the same school, but I go to another school and know them through work. Kate also has a boyfriend who I am pretty good friends with. I went to the prom at Pams school and of course, saw Kate and her boyfriend there. I don't think he knows Kate wants to go to prom with me, and I don't think he would be happy to hear that.\n\nJust a few days ago, Pam and I reconciled and it seems that all is well and we will be going together. Kate has already told her parents that she has a date to prom with me, and I believe she has bought a dress. I tried to talk to her about the situation, but she just tells me that I need to tell Pam that I'm going with Kate. I don't want to loose Kate as a friend and I don't see any way to tell her I'm going with Pam without it ending badly. I'm also sure that if I upset Pams friend, Pam won't be to happy with me either. What shall I do? Thanks", "summary": "Friend wants to go to prom with me, but I am already going with my girlfriend. She won't listen when I tell her this"}
{"id": "t3_3xdyj6", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by vomiting in church.", "post": "As you all have probably guessed by now, no this did not happen today, but when I was twelve.\n\nThe day is Easter Sunday, and my sister is sick. I'm not a religious man but when I was younger my family insisted on going to church, so as usual my mother and I attended Easter mass. I felt fine for the whole hour and a half or so before communion, and then we line it up to collect our jeezit cracker. I put it in my mouth and my stomach rolls, and I tell my mom I'm gonna be sick. I remember her asking if I can wait just a little longer as we enter the pew but she couldn't even finish her sentence before my twelve year old self projectile vomited the body of Christ all over God's workshop. Everybody gasped and whispered to one another and I never realized until I was older that they all probably thought I was the antichrist or something.\n\nThey never made me go back to church after that, or Sunday school for that matter so I was chill.", "summary": "Projectile vomited the body of Christ on his rebirth day, was thought to be an antichrist and got to skip out on church for the rest of forever"}
{"id": "t3_3080i4", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "SV: 15lbs in a week and a half!", "post": "Hello r/loseit! As part of my weight loss journey, I've gotta hold myself accountable for every action I take. Part of that is sharing with all of you and hopefully I can inspire someone like I've been inspired by this sub! \n\nMy first week has wrapped up and let me start off by saying it's getting easier and easier every single day. I'm keeping myself to under 1800  healthy calories (MFP says I should intake 2700-3000). Before I was eating burgers and fries large sized of course, with soda for almost every meal. If it wasn't a burger it was deep fried chicken sandwiches or breakfast food. Now I'm intaking fruits, salad, grilled chicken, brown rice, and the occasional chicken taco without sauce or cheese (I'd rather drink milk).\n\nI've also been going on bike rides as often as my body will tolerate.  Usually just a circuit through my neighborhood with multiple laps so I can track my splits and see how my conditioning is going and it's always 5 miles minimum. \n\nWell, after the first week I've lost 16 lbs. I started cutting out sodas about 2 weeks ago and I decided to stop being lazy and unmotivated and change my life. I'm doing something about being overweight and it feels amazing. I'm sleeping better and have more energy throughout the day which motivates me to push myself further and further with each day. I'm now a stones throw from being under 400lbs. It feels awesome!", "summary": "calorie counting, simple exercise daily, and a positive mindset have helped me lose 16lbs now I'm down to 409 :)"}
{"id": "t3_k6oer", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "In a healthy relationship, but still scared from past.", "post": "This is my first post, so bear with me:\n\nI [F] was in a relationship for almost two years with my first real boyfriend. I started talking to him about a month after I was released from the hospital (I was there as a high-risk patient with clinical depression). He helped me get my life back in order, and gave me something to love. We were serious and very committed, or so I thought. After much talk, we did eventually become intimate. \nAfter the first year he started acting differently. He became demanding and distant, but I obeyed because he was all I knew. I was completely in love with him and was positive I would kill myself if I wasn't with him. By then, he had become abusive. I never told anyone. Near the end, I found evidence that he had cheated numerous times. Even then, I wouldn't break it off. It took my two closest friends to convince me to break up with him. After I broke up with him (which I had to do on his voicemail because he was at his other girlfriend's house), I still had a hard time getting over my addiction to him.\n\nOne of my best friends, coincidentally a co-worker of ^his, started becoming more than just a friend. Nowadays, this friend is my boyfriend. He treats me better than anyone I've ever known, I love him and I know the feeling is reciprocated. Recently, I started having nightmares and fears about getting in too deep again, about feeling addicted again, and being abused again. I KNOW this guy would never hurt me on purpose, and I have talked to him about it. But how do I get over this irrational fear?", "summary": "I was in an abusive relationship, currently in a much better, safer one, yet I'm still scared. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_524rch", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Does intentionally taking a week without talking or hanging out count as a bad omen for the relationship? (30/m and 27f)", "post": "I've been dating this awesome chick since late June. The sexual chemistry is unbelievable. We are very open with our feelings, have the same sick sense of humor, and tend to both be athletic.\n\nSo the issue is that we have really lost ourselves. We both are addicted to hanging out with each other. We have both stopped or slowed down our workout regimen and gained weight. I think that the loss of our scheduled activities has caused us to both be a bit depressed.\n\nThe relationship has been moving quickly. She met my folks and I met her dad. We already say I love you to each other.\n\nShe has moments of distance that she attributes to missing her home and family. She has been in this city for about a year and has next to no friends. Im a bit of a workaholic and was a running addict before I met her, so I rarely see my friends.\n\nHere is the big one.. She wants to move back home, close to her family. She doesn't really the lack of her social network in this city and wants to be with her big circle back home.\n\nAfter the time I have spent with her, I think that this could potentially be someone that I could spend my life with. Ive dated around for a very long time. She certainly stands apart. I would move to be with her. She tells me that she wants me to move with her.\n\nThe moments of distance, when she is homesick, has kinda killed my self esteem. She says that as we hit new milestones, with out her understanding why, makes her miss home. She has mentioned that she wants to make a family close to home, so maybe that is it.\n\nI suggested a week without talking or texting, while she takes a trip home. That way we can both see where things lay.   Did I make a mistake here? Was this a good idea?", "summary": "Found great girl, we both love each other. She wants to move back home and says she wants to take me with her. I suggested taking a week without talking to see how we feel then.  Good idea or bad move?"}
{"id": "t3_2aiqep", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Getting Skinnier, But Not Losing Weight... I'm Confused.", "post": "Hi, I'm new to this subreddit. I came here because I've been overweight for most of my adult life and recently was diagnosed with a genetic medical condition that can only be treated by being a healthy body weight.\n\nSo for the last few months I have been working really hard (mostly the last month) at eating very healthy - 80% vegetables and fruit, vegetable based proteins more often than animal protein, major cuts in sugar and carb intake, etc.\n\nI have also been exercising a few times a week with a friend - going to the gym, aquasize, walking in the park. I work a desk job and 12 hour shifts, so I'm not nearly as active as I should be, but I'm getting better.\n\nSo what is really frustrating for me right now is that I have noticed I am getting skinnier. I can fit my old jeans that are 2 sizes smaller than the ones I've been wearing for the last year. My fat jeans are starting to feel more loose. Nobody has commented or noticed yet though, so I don't think it's much. But I have not lost any weight according to the scale! I keep going up and down a few pounds, but really I've only lost like 2 pounds from a month ago.\n\nI'm starting to think maybe my fat has just relocated? Am I doing something wrong with my diet and exercise? My medical condition (PCOS) makes it very hard for me to lose weight because it's a hormone imbalance, but it shouldn't be impossible... Just starting to feel very discouraged.", "summary": "trying to do everything right for weight loss, feel skinnier and fit smaller jeans, but I haven't lost more than 2 pounds. Is my fat relocating? What am I doing wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_22dwjz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Ugh, she[f28] and I [m29] have broken up after four years. Been about two weeks. How does anyone do this?", "post": "Yeah, nothing really new, this is just venting, but really, how does anyone do this? I've been through a fair amount in my life, but I've never felt more lonely and sick to my stomach. Everything reminds me of her. I live in a large city and it's just depressing seeing and doing all the things I enjoy because we had done all those things together. It hurts too because we basically broke up for stupid reasons that in a year or so probably would have resolved themselves (or not, who knows). We did start to fight frequently and are both stressed out. I miss her so much though. I acted pretty poorly towards the end of the relationship and basically drove her away. I've apologized profusely but I guess it was just too late. \n\nThe worst part of this is thinking about what she is doing right now, who she is with, if she is as miserable as I am. I know I can now pursue other people but I just don't want to. I hate being alone, but I can't seem to put in the effort with other people. Not to mention my parents are visiting in a couple of weeks and they have only met her a handful times (I live a ways from home). So now I have to break it to them that they won't be seeing her, ugh.\n\nI do work a lot, go to the gym nearly every day, but I did that shit before. I almost feel like I'm getting to old for this and my life will never be the same because I won't be able to forget all the good times we had. Things have just lost their meaning. It's so depressing. \n\nAnyone else feel this way? I know people have, but would like to hear any similar stories. Basically looking for some kind of comfort.", "summary": "How does one REALLY cope with a break up like this? How did you forget about all the good times and stop obsessing over what she is doing now?"}
{"id": "t3_143323", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21M) snooped on gfs (21F) Facebook and don't know how to feel.", "post": "Alright so this could be a bit long. Gf and I have been dating for around 11 months, everything seems great. I know her FB pass because she told me a few months ago out of random. So I decide to check it out for the hell of it and I look at the messages. 2 most recent ones are from past exes, both times she initiated conversation. Even though the messages weren't about anything exclusive, One guy is a douche and the other got her pregnant and wasn't man enough to step up and take care of the kid so she got an abortion... either way, shes been talking to these guys and got both their numbers. Yet I haven't hardly heard from her all day. I feel sad and somewhat betrayed, what should I do here? I planned on asking to marry this girl in the next few months...", "summary": "Did the dumb thing in snooping on gf because haven't heard from her in hours. I have no clue how to bring this up to her.... I feel betrayed."}
{"id": "t3_4chyut", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24f] boyfriend [23m] is punishing me for not been ready for a full commitment at the beginning of our one year relationship.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year now, and we have known each other for over two. He claims he's been in love with me since he met me, however I was in a relationship at the time. When we first started dating I was fresh out of a relationship, so I was hesitant to jump right in. It didn't mean I did not feel anything for him, I was just taking my time and making sure everything was right. He was head over heels for me, and I was so greatful for how he was acting.\n\nHowever, after a week of dating he jumped in told me he loved me and wanted everything from me. I wasn't ready for that so it took me around two months to say it back.\n\nThe problem is now, after a year he is resentful for it. Now I am head over heels for him, and he claims that I rejected him at the beginning and it's changed his feelings. He doesn't believe he can ever feel that kind of love anymore. It's emotionally destroyed me and has ruined our relationship. Now he is distant and sometimes unkind. He claims he still loves me and wants a future.\n\nI know it's silly but I can't help but blame myself. It's caused a lot of stress over the past few months.\n\nI'm unsure how to proceed as I don't want to end things, but I'm an emotional wreck and no longer trust him.", "summary": "I was not ready for a serious relationship right away, and a year later my boyfriend still resents me for it."}
{"id": "t3_4uas6b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F26] have to bottle up my anger because I don't know how to control it.", "post": "Throwaway because I haven't admitted this to anyone. and because people see me as a very calm and very chill person. Like to the max. That's what I try to project and that's what I feel that I am 95% of the time. \n\nBut the other 5% of the time I am either in a state of extreme stress and anxiety from bottling up a shit ton of rage, or feeling really fucking great from being able to act out all that energy and just *rage.* I can count the number of times the latter has happened and I feel completely out of control when it does but also simultaneously high af. \n\nI just realized that this is a serious problem today after an incident with a neighbor and his dog. I won't go into the specifics and I can't even write down my exact thoughts towards him for you to read because they are so heinous. I felt like he was completely in the wrong in a situation that was 100% preventable. As it was happening I could feel that particular kind of anger building and so did not speak a single word to him. I just let him yell. If I had said anything it would have been very bad and could have led to very bad actions. I had zero facial expressions either, basically just a brick. \n\nThis happened a few hours ago all I've been able to do is fixate on what I would have done had there been no consequences. Or what I would like to do the next time I see him. Or what justice should be for someone like him. All compassion I thought I had just goes completely out the window. All really nasty stuff. When this happens these feelings stay with me for *weeks.*   \n\nThis really interrupts my chill and I hate it. I hate that I have these thoughts and this response sometimes, it feels like all the good I thought I was is completely gone. Like I'm wearing layers and layers of makeup but really deep down I'm just a monster.\n\nI think my question is what can I do to not be this way? Sometimes I feel like I even enjoy having this \"dark side\", which is even more sick.", "summary": "I try really hard to suppress my anger but it doesn't always work and sometimes I lose control. When it does work, the feelings of rage eat at me for weeks. How do I get a handle on this?"}
{"id": "t3_1sj2q3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Fellow redditors, How would you deal with my current situation? How would you approach it?", "post": "I am a current student at DeVry university in Chicago Illinois, I love the college and everything but I've been thinking of doing something else with my life. I thought about double majoring and becoming a teacher the program I'm in at the moment is called ECT (Electronic, Computer, Technology). I wasn't the best student and I did pretty bad in high school which limit where I wanted to go. So I settled for either DeVry or Harold Washington. As far as talking to my parents. My step dad is against everything else except DeVry he wants me to go there because that's where he went and he thinks I'll be secured with a job from there when I graduate. Here's the catch. He wants me to go two years, I want to go four years or maybe even more. Every time I bring it up he gets mad and calls me an idiot. At this point I don't know what to do. So if anyone can tell me their college story and what they did to achieve it. I would love to hear some motivation.", "summary": "I have thoughts of going to another college. Step Dad tells me no every time and is only worried about the money."}
{"id": "t3_3ak433", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23m) don't feel as attracted to my new gf (20f) anymore because she farts around me", "post": "I know this is idiotic. I know that everyone farts and that it's unhealthy to hold them in. But neither of my other girlfriend's used to fart around me. I mean I heard the odd one, now and then, but with my new girlfriend it's every other day.\n\nShe doesn't do it to be obnoxious or funny - she says excuse me and acts like its no big deal. And I know, logically, that its not. But it really bothers me. They don't even smell bad, it's not about that. It's just that I don't want to hear them. It honestly makes me feel less attracted to her.\n\nI don't fart that often, but when I need to I go to the bathroom when she's around. Would it be ok to ask her to do the same? I'm assuming my other girlfriends did this too.\n\nI've only been dating my current girlfriend for seven months, so maybe that's why I'm not comfortable with it yet. Maybe if we stay together for longer and have more intimacy with each other eventually I'll be ok with it. But at the moment I'm not, is that ok to tell her? Has anyone else dealt with this or know a sensitive way to bring it up?", "summary": "my girlfriend farts around me all the time and I'm not comfortable with it. I want to know a good way to talk to her about it."}
{"id": "t3_4c7udq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] dating someone [19F] who doesn't believe in love", "post": "Well, first I should tell you a little bit about her. I know her since we're very young (10 yo), but she was just a friend I didn't have much relation with. After years of not being in touch with her, we met at college in 2014. We started talking more and more, and I discovered that she was extremely smart and we shared a lot of interests. \n\nLong story short, after a lot of comings and goings we started dating like 3 months ago. \n\nShe is very weird in many aspects: she doesn't like hugs or holding hands, she doesn't like me to tell her cute things. And of course she never does this things unless I ask her to. \n\nShe has already told me more than once that she doesn't believe in love, that she only \"loved\" once (an ex bf she had). She says that she is never gonna love again. \n\nSometimes she tells me really mean things. For example, the other day we were chatting and she asked me if I could ever be unfaithful to her (I told her that of course no). Then I asked her the same question and she told me that she couldn't answer because she never knows what can happen. She then told me not to listen to what she'd said. This is just one example from many.\n\nOn the other hand, I have to admit that she is really honest, she is really confused with herself and if I have to describe her I'd say she doesn't even like herself. And I forgot to tell, last year we were in a kind of relationship that wasn't serious, I wanted to date her but she didn't cause she still hadn't really overcome her ex (and she told me that).\n\nI think she has some psychiatric issues like bipolarity and alexithymia. \n\nWhat should I do? Any advices? Am I exaggerating a little bit? Is she isn't that weird or unloving? Thank you very much\n\nP.S: her mother died when she was very young (6 yo), that certainly had a major impact on her personality\n\n\u2500\u2500\u2500\u2500\u2500\u2500\u2500\u2500", "summary": "i'm dating someone who doesn't believe in love. I've been having an informal relationship with her for almost 2 years but now we are officially because she has overcome her ex."}
{"id": "t3_1tzjk9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[22M] friend[23M], cheated with my [22M] friend's girlfriend[21F]. What do I do?", "post": "My friend (22M), let's call him A, came to me and told me he cheated with his best friend (B)'s girlfriend. She is in town for the month and will be going back soon. After they slept together, she told A that she wants to dump B to be with him. A told her that he doesn't do long distance (she lives in another country) and even though he kept saying that, they still continue sleeping. She eventually broke up with B and now I have B coming to me seeking emotional support. It's destroying me that I have to keep this secret and to comfort B.\n\nB asked A if he could do him a favor and let her sleep at his place (he completely trusts him) and he has no clue that they are just sleeping together behind his (B) back.\n\nB now thinks he owes A a massive favor and is buying him gifts, favors, errands, whatever. \n\nShe will be heading home soon but this doesn't change the position I'm in.\n\nWhat do I do? Do I just pretend like I know nothing or does B deserve to know? I don't know how B will react.", "summary": "I'm stuck in an awkward situation with boy A cheating with boy B's gf and both are coming to me; one gloating and the other crying and thinking A is doing him a solid favor."}
{"id": "t3_1t8n4m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Bored as hell with my love life [25/f]. I think I'm having a crisis.", "post": "Been with my bf for 3 1/2 years. I care about him but I am extremely bored of our sex life. I have no idea how to tell him this without hurting his feelings. \nDon't know if I should tell him or just leave him. I get freaked out thinking about having sex with the same person forever. It's so begrudgingly boring, the idea to me, even though I have only slept with 3 guys at age 25.  \n\nMore than that I feel like I'd be boring to my partner. Can't imagine anyone wanting to have sex with me forever, even though I am considered to be pretty attractive. Maybe I have some phobia, I don't know.", "summary": "Bf for 3 1/2 years. Bored with my sex life. Freaked out thinking about having sex with the same person forever. Dunno how to get over this."}
{"id": "t3_4jh8bc", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "If a guy you've been hanging out with googles you, does it mean he's into you?", "post": "I (late20sF) have a friend (late20sM) that I've known casually for many years but have only hung out with a handful of times because we both have moved around a lot. Nothing explicitly romantic has ever happened between us, but we have a really good connection and sometimes I've wondered if we would have dated if the timing had worked out better. We now live about a half hour apart and recently we hung out for the first time in several months. I have a personal webpage that tracks analytics so I can see who visits my page and where they're located. Late that night, I got an alert that someone had just searched for me on google and had visited a few of the pages on my personal webpage. Based on the location I know it was him. \n\nIs this a strong sign he is interested in me? Or is it somewhat common for people to google random friends of theirs?", "summary": "casual friend googles me at night after hanging out earlier in the day. does it mean he's into me?"}
{"id": "t3_xo260", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is this over the line?", "post": "To cut a very long story short, I caught my boyfriend out by seeing on his 'recent items' on his laptop that he'd watched a video of one of his ex's and him together. We've been together a year and a half or so and have been living together just over a month. He's 26/m, I'm 22/f. I'd been away for 2 days with work when this must have happened. \n\nI have no issue with him watching porn, although I do think he watches way more than normal and I guess that's another issue (he'd watch it on his lunch break back at home and then in the evening as standard, and other days it would definitely be more). It's just way, way over the line for me for him to watch it with people he used to be with. Is this over-reacting? I plan to talk to him about it later because this conversation came up between us a week or so ago and he said he didn't do it and would think that was over the line too, he just wanted the collections to have a 'history'. So not only does he think he's doing wrong, he's lying too.", "summary": "would you have an issue with your partner continuing to watch videos of him and ex's together when in a new relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_3bdgwc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [22F] of two months and I [26M] are planning a cross country road trip lasting two weeks. It'll be the first time we're spending 100% of our time together. What are some important things I can do to make this memorable and fulfilling experience?", "post": "We have the logistics planned, e.g. route, destinations, budget, rental car, etc. Driving from the east coast to the west, then flying back. But there's one dynamic I need to prepare for: the fact that I'll be spending every single hour with her. All day, all night, in a car, motels, and sightseeing destinations.\n\nI hear from another female friend that on her past roadtrip, she hated the friend that she went with by the end of the trip. Being couped up in car nonstop with no other company turned them both miserable. I don't see this happening with my girlfriend, but it did make me realize that this experience will also actually be a test of patience.\n\nI've known my girlfriend for a year and have dated her for two months, to give you some context on the duration of our relationship. It certainly is a growing one, and we're at the point where a private roadtrip sounds very appealing to both of us. For some further important context, both of us got laid off from our jobs recently and we're looking to decompress mentally and enjoy a relaxing break.\n\nWhat are some particular things/mindsets/activities I can bring with me for this trip to make it enjoyable and progressive for her, me, and us as a growing couple? How can we make it more than a regular old roadtrip and into a fulfilling and bonding experience?", "summary": "My girlfriend [22F] and I [26M] are spending two weeks nonstop with each other on a roadtrip. How can I make this an amazing experience?"}
{"id": "t3_1bv6d5", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Girlfriend cleaned out my personal and business account when she left, need advice for Virginia", "post": "My girlfriend and I were together for 4 years and recently moved to VA.  She couldn't find a job so she began helping me with my business and personal affairs.  This gave her banking account access to my personal and business.  \n\nThing went well for a long time but our relationship soured and while I was out of town she moved out.  I don't really care about the personal items/money she took...that can be recovered in time and I didn't want her on the street anyway.  But she cleaned out my business account for about 7500.00.  That money wasn't really mine, it was from customer whom had ordered things that I haven't paid my distributor for yet.  So now I haven't the income to re-order those things and send them to my customers.  \n\n I've waited about a month to try and reason with her before calling the police but now I feel like I don't have an option.  She hasn't responded to anything and now my customers are pissed because I haven't delivered. \n\nwhat are my options if any?  I don't have money to hire a lawyer which is what brought me here.", "summary": "ex GF stole 7500 from business account which was money customers gave me to purchase parts for them...it's not disposable income."}
{"id": "t3_4vcakk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I just give up?", "post": "So my (F21) recent ex (M20) have decided to try and work things out but aren't back together yet. \n\nI know taking things slow is a good idea and we are (not texting or hanging out as much as we used to) but when we do get together it's like nothings changed; we still hold hands, kiss, cuddle, ect.\nWe do argue less which is nice.\n\nWe're going to a party tonight with a group of friends who don't know about the split (or that we're currently trying) I told him this and he said that I don't have to act like I'm in a relationship....even though that's basically what we do without the label.\n\nHe also encourages me to date people and not to hold back on account of him...is the normal for someone who wants to make things work?\nOn one hand I appreciate it since technically I am single but on the other hand I want him to want us to have dates and be together--not with other people.\n\nI don't really know what to think. Advice please?", "summary": "My ex and I are trying to work things out but I'm worried he actually doesn't want to and need advice."}
{"id": "t3_24t4iq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 F] with my Dad [60 M], emailed me and my siblings this morning informing me that he bought our mom's Mother's Day gifts FOR us.", "post": "This is a really trivial problem compared to typical r/relationships but I'd still like advice if anyone has it.\n\nMy dad sent an email to me and my two siblings (25F and 23M) this morning with a screenshot of what he ordered for our mom for Mother's Day. It's a huge, very expensive order of flowers/chocolate/assorted gifts with the prices included (obviously intentionally).\n\nAlong with the screenshot he added, \"I addressed the card to say it's from all of YOU, but don't let that change what YOU yourselves plan on doing for your mom next Sunday, if anything.\"\n\nI'm irritated and hurt. I don't understand why he feels the need to do this and rub it in our faces. It's fine to buy Mother's Day gifts for your wife when your kids are too little, but fuck, we're all in our twenties and I'm about to be a first time mother myself. And I've never disappointed my mom on Mother's Day.\n\nI resisted sending a biting response and just simply said, \"Don't worry, I already have her gift ready\" but I'm still steaming hours later. He never replied so I don't know if that was a satisfying enough answer or what.\n\nAlso it seems like it's going to be pretty awkward when I visit for Mother's Day and all of these gifts get delivered, she reads the tag and thinks it's from us kids. Then my mom will be thanking us, thinking we got together and ordered this expensive stuff for her that none of us can afford.\n\nJust ugh. What is wrong with my dad and how can I let him know this isn't okay? Should I tell my mom it's not from us or just drop it?", "summary": "My dad bought expensive gifts for my mom on Mother's Day and set it up to look like it's from me and my siblings. I'm offended and don't know if I should say something or drop it."}
{"id": "t3_211gje", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my girlfriend [23 F] of 16 months, have been fighting all the time", "post": "So me and my girlfriend of 16 months moved in together 4 months ago after a year of dating. Since then, we have been fighting at least once a week over stupid reasons. While some of the reasons do become some what valid, I'm talking about full on screaming matches over the fact that I want to get something quick to eat before having to do something while she wants to go out for dinner even though I'm busy; or getting mad enough to throw things at me because I can't help her dry dishes at the current time. The thing is, it's not just her getting mad there are times I am getting mad too. We have both started our own fights over stupid things, and it results in us yelling at each other for an hour, her crying for half an hour, and then her telling me that she should never have moved in and wants to move out. \n\nWe do love each other (at least I do) and we try to reconcile it, but after a week we end up in the exact same spot. We are both full time university students, and I work full time her part time to pay the bills/rent. She does alot of the housework (almost all) and cooks on the weekdays while I cook on the weekends (the days we work, basically whoever is home first cooks supper). I would tend to think, based on our jobs only, that I tend to have a busier schedule and more stress, but we do have fairly equal levels over all. I'm running out of options on what I can try to do, and don't want to end this relationship, but I fear it is coming as we are both becoming less willing to help each other out, and more angry with each other while having a shorter temper overall. \n\nI'm asking the experts here if there are things they can suggest so we can try and stop these fights. I first thought it was additional stress from us moving in together causing friction, but now I don't know anymore. I really don't want to break up with her for so many other reasons, and the other 6 days of the week we get close again, but the one day during the weekend is driving us apart.\n\nThanks in advance, Jimmypickins.", "summary": "Girlfriend and me are arguing all the time and on the verge of breaking up, need help to fix the situation!"}
{"id": "t3_36kubz", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Flying into Amsterdam with a friend on June 14th, and flying out of Berlin on June 30th. What do I do?", "post": "Hey!\n\nSo a friend and I are flying into Amsterdam, and then leaving on a flight out of Berlin. So minus airplane travel, that is like 13-14 days in between.\n\nI am trying to plan the trip now, but I feel a little overwhelmed, so I thought I'd ask all you guys. (Reddit is usually my google) I kind of want to try to plan some sort of trail that leads us to Berlin throughout that time, but also seeing amazing and beautiful things (specific I know).\n\nWe're two guys, both 21, and not afraid to rough it. I was thinking at looking at those help-ex sites and couch surfing. Cheaper the better, and I dont mind doing work to support my stay. A major thing we both love is nature, so I want to encompass those sights, but not miss out on the city too.\n\nSo, my question to you guys; any suggestions? Sights I need to see, things I need to do, things I shouldn't do? Great places to stay in, terrible places? Some sort of magical convenient trail that can show us awesome things on our way to Berlin? \n\nI know this is broad as all hell, but I feel like I am being dropped in the ocean and I have to navigate something. I've even drawn a map to help myself visually try to map it out. Still confused. So any thoughts, comments, ideas, anything, would make a huge difference.", "summary": "Have 14 days to get from Amsterdam to Berlin. What should I do along the way, within a good price range, and how do I make it there?"}
{"id": "t3_43120r", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "OTC canker sore(?) medicine, long white stick packaged in clear tube with red ends, tastes of sour acid", "post": "I originally posted this in the subreddit where you are supposed to post the things you forgot the names of. They told me I'm not allowed to ask my question there because there was a strong likelihood that I might one day use medicine and it's totes frowned upon to use medicine or mention a medicine or talk to anyone about medicine ever. Its like the stock market, we all know it exists but nobody can give you advice about it or they'll be hung. So anyway, here goes.\n\nI remember when I was a kid whenever I got a canker sore in my mouth my mom would pull out this clear tube with red ends on each side and she'd open it and she'd fish out a long white cylindrical\u2014medicine. It was shaped like a piece of chalk and the entire piece was the medicine, you put it against the sore in your mouth and it deadened it. if you accidentally tasted the part of your mouth that you medicated, it was almost like licking a 9 volt battery. Really awful. Maybe its no longer sold, maybe it was an off label use, maybe my mom was torturing me by rubbing white painted batteries in my mouth. Any help here?", "summary": "its medicine, its cylindrical. Not just the package, the medicine itself. You put it on sores. What is it? Am I allowed to see it again?"}
{"id": "t3_28zcu7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Can't tell if my guy friend M(23) is being serious when he flirts with me. How do I F(21) talk to him about it?", "post": "I know that I'm 21 and should know how to approach these sort of things, but I unfortunately am a little bad at it!\n\nI've known my friend for about 6 months. He's always been playful/flirty, but it's in his nature. I'm working a seasonal job for the summer and have been gone for a month.\n\nA couple weeks before I left, I ended up falling asleep at his house during a movie. He asked if I wanted to sleepover, and I did. We ended up cuddling during the night, but we never talked about it. \n\nAfter that, he was more flirty. I figured now that I'm gone, that it would've died down. But he texts me often, tells me how much he misses me and that he wishes I was home. He calls me babe/jokes around about our marriage when we're talking to our mutual friends. I know that those are all OBVIOUS signs of flirting, but he's also a guy who jokes around a lot. \n\nHow can I talk to him about it? I do have feelings for him, but I don't want to get my hopes up if he's not being serious. I also don't want to freak him out by asking him if I'm reading into things too much. Should I wait until I get home?", "summary": "Guy friend flirts with me, don't know how to bring up whether he's being serious or not. What do you guys think is the best way?"}
{"id": "t3_1wpcjx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23f] landlord keeps coming into my apartment unannounced.", "post": "Myself and my two roommates (both 19/f) have been living in our house for a little over a year now and we more or less have no problems with our landlord. Since the new year however she has been trying to rent the fourth room in our house so shes been coming over to our house almost every day/every other day unannounced coming down on us about keeping the house clean and not leaving any of our personal items out so it looks presentable when she does a viewing. The house isn't usually messy, just an example, I had a pair of socks near the kitchen table one day after I got off work and she came over a bit later and freaked out about it.\n\nWe don't normally have a problem with her coming over but there has been one too many days where either me or one of my roommates would be getting out of the shower or something only to find electricians or repair people in our house without our knowledge. That or being woken up at about 8/9 am and being kicked out of our own bedrooms so they can do work, again, without letting us know they are coming over in advance.\n\nMy roommates are losing their minds about it because we never know if someone is in our house while we are gone and considering how our landlord has been acting lately we really don't want her coming over without telling us first (yesterday one of my roommates came home to find her cleaning our bathroom and moving our things to make it \"presentable\". A few day prior to that she came over and started to go through our fridge asking who owned what food).\n\nDon't get me wrong, I like that she has people to come over to fix things and make sure the house is ok to live in but I don't think it's too much to ask give us some notice besides \"Hey, the electrician will be over in 10 minutes, be sure to let him in the house\". She's coming over tomorrow to collect rent and I'm really not sure how to approach this to her.", "summary": "Landlord keeps coming over unannounced with various repair people and it's making myself and my roommates uncomfortable in our own home."}
{"id": "t3_3f49td", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 F] love my BF [29 M] of 4 years, but should we break up?", "post": "My BF found a great job in the south and we have been living down here for 4 months now. I like it okay, but I have been feeling really sad about missing out on being with my family and friends (and dogs!). This job has the potential to be a long running career for him and although the company does have multiple locations in multiple states I'm not sure they will ever be in the state my family is in. Which is a problem for me. \n\nI'm very much in love with him, and can see us getting married someday however I feel as though I'm at a crossroads, where if I commit to him its commiting to a life without my loved ones. And I have a really close relationship with my whole family. I knew I was moving to be with him but I didn't want it to be a long term commitment. I brought it up with him and he agreed that he isn't including me in his future plans but didn't seem to want to alter them. \n\nBefore we moved, it was loosely agreed that we would stay down here for a few years, he would chip away at his student loans while I either went back to school or found a job and saved up. Which sounded fine, but as of late he's been talking a lot about staying for the next 5 or even 10 years. And I'm not sure that's going to change....", "summary": "Should I stick it out with my BF in hopes that he will want to move back to our town someday or cut and run and stop wasting my time??"}
{"id": "t3_2kg4m3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my boyfriend [21 M] 18 months, keeps treating me like the bad parent", "post": "My boyfriend and I communicate well, I like to think. If something has been bothering us, we will openly discuss it and try to improve the situation. We both don't have issues in backing down or admitting that we are wrong (he struggles slightly as he is Italian). \n\nHowever, since he has been staying at my house regularly it has been getting a little tough. We are both house sitting my parents house, I work full time and he is still at university. Lately, he keeps calling me in front of his friends asking me if they can come over. I have no problem if he wants to socialise outside of the house, or on the weekend. But, I don't particularly want to have boys at my house after a full day of work (sometimes 13 hour days). It puts me in an awkward position because I instantly look like the bad parent if I say no, I am not comfortable. It is lose-lose for me. \n\nI have had this discussion with him, and he agreed to give me more notice and respect the fact that we have conflicting socialising schedules. Unfortunately, it hasn't continued and I am a bit lost. Particularly today, I am unwell and now having to share my relatively small house with very loud boys. I feel guilty, like I am mothering him or am acting like a crazy girlfriend (I have a huge fear of this) - what do you guys reckon I should do?", "summary": "my boyfriend keeps putting me in awkward positions in front of his friends, and making me feel uncomfortable in my own home."}
{"id": "t3_2sebt1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16M] am quickly beginning to lose my patience with my Mother [45F] and Sister [20F]", "post": "First post, sorry for any fuck ups. Ok, I'm a 16 year old kid and I live with my mother and my sister and for the last 3-4 months I've began to enjoy my home life less and less.\n\n Don't get me wrong, there's by no means any abuse or anything like that but my family are constantly talking (to me and behind my back) about how much I'm a failure, and I'm not going to achieve anything in life.\n\nFor example I've wanted to get into a trade (thinking sparky) for about 6 months now, about a month ago she got my report card in the mail (less than good) and absolutely freaked out, stormed into my room at 7 in the morning and told me she was pulling me out of school because I was \"too fucking dumb\" to go anymore, and also told me that I was to much of a lazy prick to get a trade so I'd have to go work a retail job for the rest of my life (No).\n\nBut then, when I began calling some companies about starting an apprenticeship she told me there was no way in hell I was dropping out and I was staying until year 12.\n\nIt's gotten to the point where I don't enjoy talking to them, I recently started dating a girl (first girlfriend) and my sister and mother laughed, told me that I was going to realise sex is nothing like porn and that she would leave me. \n\nAnd so much other shit that would take me hours to write, I love my family, but I don't think I like them and I'm worried that I'm going to say something very stupid very soon.", "summary": "my family doesn't talk to me anymore, they just tell me I'm a shitty person and I'm at the end of my rope."}
{"id": "t3_4x7005", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] am really worried about my sister's [21F] decision to stay with her boyfriend [25M]", "post": "My sister told me a few days ago that her boyfriend lied to her about having herpes. He said he was clean when she asked upfront, and then admitted later that he had herpes but was \"too scared to lose her\" if he told her. \n\nI don't really need to provide more evidence of his manipulative and unbelievable behaviour, but beyond that he's constantly talking about how \"vulnerable\" he's being with her and has said, and I quote, that he would \"lose his life\" if he lost her..??? They've been together for less than a month. He's being a manipulative and insane piece of shit and I'm really scared that she doesn't seem to care. \n\nI've told her exactly what my opinions are, and she respectfully told me to \"stop bashing her boyfriend\". There's no getting through to her and I don't want to distance her or alienate her because I don't know what this guy is going to do and I care about her so much. \n\nWhat should I do? Right now I'm just keeping quiet and staying out of it but if there's anything you guys can suggest that would be really helpful. Or maybe you'll tell me she's an adult who had made her own decisions, which is pretty much what I've been trying to remind myself lately even though that leaves me concerned and with no way to help.", "summary": "my sister's boyfriend is a manipulative creep and I really want to help her see it because it's not healthy and I care about her."}
{"id": "t3_4xt468", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by locking the cat out of the kitchen", "post": "Mandatory happened on Sunday afternoon. \n\nI was cooking pasta, the stove top was hot with the pasta boiling away and the cat we are currently looking after was getting too curious for his own good. \n\nAfter several attempts of jumping onto the stove top to suss out where the food smell was coming from, I picked him up and put him in the room next door, and shut the door. \n\nI guess he wanted back in badly because all I could hear were nails digging into the carpet beneath the door. Eventually the sound ceased, I had finished cooking and after restoring all the culinary supplies I went to open the door to release the cat. \n\nExcept that the door wouldn't open. The cat had pulled the carpet from the edges and jammed the door shut.\nI called my SO and had him come from his classes to unlock me from the kitchen three hours later. \nI've spent the last few hours re-attaching the carpet to the edge tacks. Any tips to get it all smoothed out before our house inspection on Wednesday would be appreciated!", "summary": "Cat rips up carpet, jams the kitchen door, awaited the arrival of SO to free me. Praying that I'll keep my bond."}
{"id": "t3_2onlen", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18F) am embarrassed by my LDR boyfriend (20'sM)", "post": "We don't have the most perfect relationship, because of the issues we had in past and especially this being both of each other's first relationship. But we have overall a good relationship and we love each other very much. \n\nSo we started off as LDR and it will be LDR for some time as it seems. When we meet in real life, he is the most kind, gentle, mature guy ever. Basically the perfect guy. But recent months when we are far away some of his actions has getting on my nerves pretty pretty bad.\n\nWe play video games all the time, competitive Counter-Strike. He is sort of pro player, and is the highest rank available. Me, I don't have much skills, but I love the game because of my competitive nature. So when we play together, all other players are lower rank than him, very lower. This creates a problem. He is shouting at people, at me whenever we make mistakes. He makes people regret playing with us. I regret sometimes too. Then there is \"trolling\", he swears at people, he calls every game we lose \"OMG cheaters\", usually writing very mean stuff to them and very freaking childish. He often argues with people over video games, in the game. I tell him whenever someone writes something offensive \"love please don't respond please if you love me\" but he is like \"OMG come on I love trolling people!\" \n\nWe had group of friends that we played with. We lost two of them, due to his behavior. Then we got a steady three other people. Recently two removed him and me, solely because of his behavior, after he shouted at the whole team specially at me for not telling him where we died. I am so embarrassed but whatever I say he gets so offensive. I don't want to leave him but recently I have lost all the good image of him.", "summary": "boyfriend turns into a 13 year old when we play video games. I am ashamed by him and lost many gaming friends because of his behavior but he doesn't cares about other people."}
{"id": "t3_2l54sy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20/M], a straight male, am in love with my best friend [22/M]. Now I have no clue where to go from here.", "post": "I met him in college and we quickly became best friends. Pretty cool, right? We do everything together and I think about him always. He makes me feel incredibly happy like no one else can. Not uncommon for best friends. A few months ago,  he found himself a girlfriend and I thought it was great and I was happy for him...until I got home and was incredibly upset by the fact that she has him and I don't. I actually felt jealous of her when they held hands or kissed. \n\nI sincerely started to feel worry around this point because I identify as a straight male, but for some reason I can't stop feeling these emotions towards my best friend.  Eventually he and his girlfriend broke up and I felt...relieved. The next few nights he stayed at my place and drank a lot. While he was passed out on the couch, I silently held his hand and kissed him while he slept. Disgusted by what just happened, I just cut off communication for two weeks hoping to get over myself and him. \n\nBut I didn't.  I just missed him more and more and I almost started crying when I saw him again. At this point I've started to realize that I have romantic feelings towards him and I feel ashamed and sick.\n\nThis is incredibly fucked. For both of us. I don't know how to approach this.\n \n\n.", "summary": "Best friend of four years, and suddenly our bromance has turned into  one way romance that he can't know about"}
{"id": "t3_2jr9ln", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my friend [22 F], how do I tell her I think she's in an abusive relationship?", "post": "Two years ago, my friend Trish went to a foreign country to study abroad. There, she met a guy, Frank, and they hit it off. \nNow, she's back in the foreign country for a year-long research program and is seeing the guy again. \n\nI think he's bad news.\n\nLast week my boyfriend sent Trish messages on facebook asking how she's enjoying the foreign country. He also asked her for help editing a short paper, since she's good at it (and he's not). She happily helped him, and everything was fine. \n\nExcept, that it wasn't. Two days later, Trish has deleted her facebook account and created a new one. She won't add any males as friends. \n\nMy boyfriend asked another mutual friend what was up, and the answer came back that Trish's boyfriend saw the facebook messages and became angry--so she deleted the account and made a new one with only girls as friends. \n\nMy boyfriend sent Frank a message explaining that they're only friends--and have been for a long time. He basically said \"chill out. Learn to trust her, but since you don't, you obviously have her fb messages and can read through them to see that I'm telling the truth.\" \nFrank replied saying that he was Trish's boyfriend, and that she shouldn't talk to any guy except him. \n\nHow can I explain this to her? The only way I can contact her is through the new facebook account--which I'm sure Frank monitors. I know Trish lives with Frank and his family in the foreign country--and I don't know that she has enough to move out. Beyond that, she seems happy with him. \n\nI just feel that it's extremely creepy and weird that Frank won't let her talk to her male friends back home.", "summary": "My friend recently moved to a foreign country. Her boyfriend refuses to let her contact her male friends. How do I express my concerns, especially when I'm certain her boyfriend can read the one form of communication I have with her?"}
{"id": "t3_11bndi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I call him out?", "post": "Okay, I'm a 22F about 7 months ago I met this guy (24M) on OKC. We chatted for about a week, exchanged numbers, and then texted for another week. We went on a date and totally hit it off. We hung out a couple more times then on the third date, I spent the night and he had mind blowing, freaky, fun, great sex. The only issue we had was the fact we lived about an hour and 15 minutes away from each other. Well, we sext all the time (I'm talking hot erotic novel type shit) and we've hung out on more occasions and then recently I've gotten super busy with work...Well. Today I was on FB and this picture pops up of him and some other girl. I totally forgot he has a FB cause he was never on it. I go to his profile...turns out he's been dating this girl since February. He never mentioned anything to me about her and he's been hitting me up like crazy to hang out again soon on top of him texting me everyday already...so reddit, what should I do? Call him out or let it ride? Or be the bigger person and end it all...", "summary": "Met a guy who I've been texting, sexting, going on dates with, and banging for 7 months and just found out he's had a GF since February. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1xf7jz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26M] am having issues with a college classmate [20M]", "post": "Using a throwaway account because a couple of my classmates are redditors.\n\nWithout going into too much detail about the class, I'll just say that the program I'm in is healthcare related, and class sessions are frequent. Furthermore, the class size is very small, and many of my classmates I already know from the previous semester.\n\nI'm having an issue with a particular classmate. For the most part he [20M] and I get along just fine. However, I've come to the realization that he only calls/text when he need something. The most irritating part is all the things he needs help with are things he should be able to figure out on his own. I, and the rest of my class, are able to do it, but he can't. At one point, he even asked me to help him cheat in another class, but I told him to piss off.\n\nI'm trying to remain civil because we're going to be with each other throughout this program, but it's getting harder not to give him a piece of my mind. I'm definitely OK with helping out a friend, but I don't consider him one, and if we weren't in class together, I wouldn't talk to the guy. I made the mistake of helping him before, and now he thinks he can come to me all the time. He's also the kind of person that asks for help and then argues about your advice. How does Reddit deal with these kinds of people?", "summary": "Classmate I see all the time comes to me asking for help, realized that's the only reason why he talks to me, tired of being used, what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_upb7s", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What strange rules did your parents/family have growing up?", "post": "I'll start - when I lived about an hour out of town between when I was 8 and 16, we had a few cats and dogs (also birds, guinea pigs, chickens, horses, ponies and ducks) and the jobs for feeding our cats and dogs was rostered around between us three kids. Being a property, our recycling bin was located near the garage, which was no where near the house. It was joined to the house by a pathway maybe 25meters long and I can tell you, as an imaginative 10 year old in the dark, that was the longest walk in the universe. \n\nIt became a habit that when nearing the end of a tin of dog or cat food my brothers and I would 'test' how little we could leave in the can to avoid the walk of doom to the garage and shunting the responsibility (and resulting terror) onto the next sibling.\n\nOur parents quickly caught wind of this when complaints of 'ridiculous amounts' were found in the tin each night and as a result, a strict ban on 'ridiculous amounts left in the tin' (later defined as an inch), which became severely punishable.", "summary": "the once innocent term 'ridiculous amount' quickly became associated with extra chores and grounding from the computer in my household."}
{"id": "t3_25wmie", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [22 F] make my mom understand why I shouldn't have a graduation party", "post": "Before people start calling me entitled or whatever, just let me explain. I am grateful she wants to do it, but I just don't like parties, especially when they're for me. But that's not even what I told her (that would be a whole other argument).\n\nI told her I don't want a party mainly because it would be weird and awkward. There are basically 3 groups of people I would invite: family friends, high school friends, and college friends. No one really knows anyone in a different group. I have some family friends who would come, it would be mostly adults. I'm still good friends with two people from high school. One would come and so would her family since I'm close with all of them. The other would try to come, but is normally crazy busy. The main issue is with my college friends. Very few live near me (I went to an out of state private school) and of those that do, only one will be in area over the summer. Most will be doing internships or research in so many other places.\n\nWhenever my mom brings this up I ask who I would invite besides family friends and the two people from high school I still talk to. Her response is my college friends. I give her the exact same explanation I gave up. She kind of grunts and drops it until she feels like bringing it up again. She's also started to make not so subtle comments about it. For example, I was saying how my high school teacher (he was my coach and I still visit him at school every few months) said I need to put more stuff on facebook because that's how he keeps track of all of us. My mom's response was \"well when you visit him you can tell him he would be invited to your graduation party if you had one\".\n\nAny advice on how I can get her to just drop this? It would just be awkward and not fun.", "summary": "Mom keeps insisting I have a graduation party even though it would be awkward because most of my friends are all over the place so I don't have many people to invite."}
{"id": "t3_3zr04b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Close friend [19M] having issues with another friend (I don't know them well)", "post": "Less than a year ago, I (27/F) met someone who has quickly become one of my best friends.  He (19/M, who I will refer to as \"Friend A\") and I met online through a common interest.  As such, I have been able to join a wonderful community that I love spending time with.\n\nFriend A is close to another member of the group.  This friend (Friend B, who I am not particularly close to and don't know very well) suffers severe bouts of depression.  I'm not sure if they are seeking professional help for it, but Friend A suffers the same thing and I know for a fact that he IS receiving help every week.\n\nFriend B has a tendency to lash out when people aren't paying attention to them.  To the point of apologizing and saying things like \"I'm going away forever now, goodbye.\"  I've witnessed this on several occasions and frankly, it scares me, though I know there's nothing I can really do for them, I don't even know their name.  Friend A is substantially closer to Friend B, and recognizes a lot of their behavior from things in his own, fairly recent past (shortly before we met).\n\nAs a result, Friend B will directly contact Friend A and INDIRECTLY blame him for their depression, saying things like \"I really need this, why can't you do this for me?\" and expecting him to step up at least several times a day.  This is very emotionally draining for Friend A.\n\nHaving been in manipulative friendships myself, I'm seeing this behavior from Friend B, and all I can see is them trying to control Friend A in some way and I am NOT a fan.  Thing is, I don't know what I can do to help Friend A.  I really don't think they should be friends, and I especially hate seeing Friend A go through emotional turmoil for simply not responding to a post once in a while.\n\nI don't know how to approach my friend without coming off sounding manipulative myself.  I am genuinely concerned for Friend A because he means a lot to me, but at the same time, I understand where he's coming from and know just how touchy the whole situation can be.", "summary": "Very close friend is in (what I think is) a manipulative and emotionally abusive relationship and I don't know what to do.  Suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_3ccvdx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] feel very unwanted by my [20M] boyfriend, resulting in me feeing insecure. Advice needed", "post": "We've been together for over a year now and I feel very insecure and bad about myself from him liking suggestive photos of girls he's had a past with while being in a relationship with me. He has also liked photos of many half naked girls on instagram and followed many. \n\nNone of these girls look like me. It's not like a type thing. I feel like he isn't attracted to me at all. \n\nIt has made me feel really insecure, which was already slightly there. I have recently spoken to him about how this made me feel. He did apologies however it still comes into my head at times. \n\nI've always been really scared he might one day cheat on me and it is my biggest fear. I can't keep bringing it up that it upsets me still. He might get sick of hearing it, and then never listen to things like that again.\n\nI feel really bad about myself, as if I'm really not good enough. I feel like the insecurity is with me, like it's my problem with my outlook on myself. He is a human, he can look at other people. There's not much I can do to stop that.\n\nI'm slightly embarrassed that his friends would have seen him like photos of this girl he has had a past with while with me. All his friends back home know this girl (he's away at university, where I met him). \n\nI don't know if I'm just taking it too personally. There are other factors that slightly impact this. We don't have sex very frequently. Not as much as I would like. The majority of time I am rejected; hes too tired, not in the mood or it's the wrong time. \n\nI feel like hes really unattracted to me and that he doesn't want me, resulting in me feeling bad about myself and the way I look. \n\nI have spoken to him about everything but I still feel like this and I just need a bit of advice as to stop feeling like this or if I am just overreacting and taking it far too personally.", "summary": "I don't think my boyfriend is that attracted to me, but is to other girls, feeling insecure and bad about myself"}
{"id": "t3_4rgd6m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So I [24 M] have been hooking up with my brothers girlfriends sister [20F] off and on for about half a year now and it's causing problems...", "post": "Okay so for about a year now my brother has been dating this girl Shay super cool chick we're pretty good friends, she has a younger sister named Allison also super cool.\n\nAllison and I have always been flirtatious around each other since we met. About six months ago she had broken up with her girlfriend and moved in with my brother, his gf, and I for about two months. \n\nAllison and I got really close within the time she moved in, about two weeks within her staying with us we ended up hooking up. We tried to become an item, her sister Shay really didn't like that idea due to the possibility of it causeing problems within her relationship with my brother. \n\nThings all hit the fan once I had told Shay that her sister And I wanted to be together, her mother, sister, and Allison were all fighting and it caused problems with Allison and I. The entire situation was tearing apart Allison's and Shays relationship, we had a really bad fight about it and stopped talking. The fighting was about the drama things would bring if things didn't work out between Allison and I.\n\nFast forward a couple months Allison and I start talking again and ended up making out a couple of times. We decided to not go further with things because we have been down this road before so we stopped. I had told my brother what happened and he recommended that I told Shay due to the fact that hiding it caused a lot of problems last time. \n\nI Told Shay everything that happened. I had told her that Allison and I are just going to be friends and that we respected them to not persue our relationship.\nYeah that was a mistake same thing all over again.\n\nNow everyone is upset with me because I opened my mouth. I really don't know what to do from here and I really don't want to lose Allison but I know I might...", "summary": "I've been hooking up with my brothers girlfriends sister and things hit the fan and now everyone is upset with me and I need advice on what to do..."}
{"id": "t3_1p6gp1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 F] started sleeping with my friend [21 M] last week but I don't know if he's become too attached to me already. I don't want to lead him on?", "post": "About a week ago I had sex with one of my friends when we were drunk after a party. Absolutely nothing had happened between us beforehand, and no one had ever said anything about any feelings, so it was kind of a surprise, but it wasn't weird or anything.\n\nWe've had sex a couple of times after that, but we spend a lot of time together because he's also one of my close friends and central to my group of friends. My best friend has said it looks like he's close to loving me already by the way he acts around me. He says things that I can tell are genuine but it's all seemed to come out of nowhere.\n\nWe haven't spoken much about the relationship but he keeps asking to and asking me on a proper date! \n\nI really don't want to lead him on if I don't want anything, but I just don't know yet. It's hardly been any time so I don't know if I am just developing feelings for him or if I won't. I don't know whether it's wrong to keep like seeing him if I'm unsure and he really likes me - I could end up liking him but it's that he is already so keen on me I don't want to end up hurting him. Especially as above all else, I don't want to lose him as a friend.\n\nIs it wrong to keep sleeping with him and seeing him when I'm not sure I like him like that yet? I don't know what could happen, but I don't want him to become too invested in something I'm not sure of yet.", "summary": "started sleeping with my friend, not sure if I like him romantically yet, he does, don't want to hurt him, is it wrong to carry on when I'm not sure how I feel yet?"}
{"id": "t3_2guj2a", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not looking at my top after running.", "post": "I'm typing this just after it happened, this has to be shared. Okay, so I've recently started endurance running, I'm doing 6 mile runs 3 times a week. My nipples normally chafe a lot but nothing to bad, but today was different. I finish the run, I'm walking home and a lot of people are staring at me, looking worried. I'm like, the fuck are you looking at? Whatever, ignore it. I walk into my house, look in the mirror and guess what? My nipples were chafing so badly they started bleeding, and being as I had been running in a sweaty top it just spread dramatically. So here these people are, suddenly seeing what looks like a maniac who knifed his own tits giving them a stare of 'Yeh, and what?' Needless to say I will be buying nipple tape and ignoring the streets for a while.", "summary": "my nipples chafed so much whilst running that they bled and I looked like a lactating vampire on the walk home."}
{"id": "t3_27blab", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[16 M] My girlfriend [16 F] has given me, an odd and unnecessary punishment... More in text.", "post": "Me and my girlfriend are currently doing our GCSE exams (we're British), and yesterday, I accidentally overslept causing me to miss an english language exam. \n\nShe was really annoyed at me, but later we found out that it's okay that I missed it I had done a lower level english language exam a few weeks ago. So that was a relief. She was still upset for the rest of the day, bless her.\n\n She was annoyed at me because the exam was still obviously important, and she was clearly worried about me because she thought that meant I instantly failed english (which thank god I haven't yet).\n\nAnyway, she told me that she doesn't want to see me outside of school until we finish our exams. We finish our exams at the end of next week, so it's not that long, but the thing that upset me is:\n\n-I feel awfully lonely not seeing her, as I don't any good friends. (She's my best friend as well as my girlfriend, I care about her deeply)\n\n-Seeing her is the only thing I look forward to, I don't really have a hobby or anything else to look forward to besides a good session on reddit. (I'm sad :D)\n\nBut yeah, after next week I'll be leaving school forever. I know seeing her at school every day seems like enough, but at the moment i only have to attend science and math lessons, as they're the only subject left that I have exams for. So I'm at school 1/2 hours at a time, and not even every day.\n\nShe said that not seeing her outside of school was \"my punishment\" but, I don't see the connection, or the point, or any reason at all.\n\nWhat do you guys think? And what should I do?\n\nOh, we are okay now, by the way, happy as usual.", "summary": "GF won't let me see her outside of school until after exams (1.5 weeks) because she got worried about me when I accidentally overslept and missed an exam. ???"}
{"id": "t3_l6xcu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Crippling back pain outta nowhere- What should I do?", "post": "6 days ago I was on a gentle bike ride (along a tar road, no hills or anything). We had just reached the point of the ride where we were going to take a 5 minute break, eat some sandwiches and begin the return leg back to our car when I sat down and felt a 'twinge' in my lower back.\n\n I commented to my buddy about the twinge, and then maybe 1 minute later I experienced the most intense pain I have ever felt. It felt like someone had snuck up behind me and thrust a long thin knife into my spine. I collapsed on the ground, with my lower back screaming in pain and my lower body feeling all strange, kinda tingly (more on the right hand side than the left, especially down my right leg). \n\nIt took 2 and a half hours to return to our car (a trip which should have taken 15 minutes). The pain got worse and worse and I could hardly move from it- it felt like a crazy war movie scene with an injured guy begging to be put out of his misery, just trying to push my bike back to the car. My buddy drove me home, where I just managed to unlock my apartment and collapse onto the floor, where I stayed with minor adjustments for the last 5 days. The pain has gradually reduced, but I still feel \"broken\" in my back- If there is weight on my lower back it really hurts. As Im typing this Im holding my weight on my forearms on my desk.\n\nI missed 3 days of work, and am just now back in the office. I scheduled an appointment with a physiotherapist this afternoon, but am not sure what else to do. (This is my first appointment- I could literally not leave the floor for the past 5 days, not even for the toilet, funfun)\n\nIm a relativly heathy guy of 27, have had a history of back problems but *nothing* like what happened to me last week.\n\n Anyone got any ideas of what could have happened, what I should do, or anything else that would help me?", "summary": "I got to experience real, *crippling* pain for the first time! And it was so much better cause it came outta fucking nowhere!"}
{"id": "t3_zjzmg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My long-distance girlfriend's [21/F] parents are too strict and she doesn't do anything about it. Is it okay to tell her to rebel against them ?", "post": "Hi,\n\nSo we've been together for 3 years now and we live in different countries. We've known each other since we were 5 in elementary school, then we lost track of each other when my family and I left my native country. It is important to mention that our mothers were very close friends. So, we got back in touch 5 years ago when she was very good friends with my best friend over there. 3 years ago when I went to my native country to visit friends and family, I met her and we saw each other twice. Ever since that time, I flew to my native country twice to surprise her but she never saw me because her parents are too strict and they don't let her leave the house. I know this to be true for 100%. The problem is she never stands up to her parents, she always listens to them and never defies them when they refuse that she goes out with friends.\n\nNow, she came with her family to my present country, and she still can't go out 5 minutes to see me...when she asked her parents, her mother was okay with the idea but her father refused. She then stormed out and locked herself in the room. Her father came a few hours later to apologize and offered that he takes her shopping... and that was it, she was no longer mad at him. I miss her so very much and I know I won't be able to go to my home country for at least 4 years, and I don't know if I'll be able to handle not seeing her for so long. They are leaving my present country in a few days and I want to see her for at least a few minutes. I want to tell her to not listen to her parents but I feel that it is wrong to tell someone to rebel in my own interest. Any help please ? I really don't know how to handle this.", "summary": "I haven't seen my long-distance girlfriend in 3 years even though we are in the same city right now. Her parents are too strict and she never stands up for what she wants. Should I tell her to rebel against them ?"}
{"id": "t3_2p9205", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 F] is torn between my passive BF [24M] and aggressive guy [22M]", "post": "I have been in a serious relationship with my best friend for the past 6 years now. Lets call him Mr Deer. Everything about him is great, hes kind, hes supportive, sweet, caring, kinda romantic in his weird way but nonetheless, hes great.\n\nThe thing about him is that hes too passive. Sure, he holds me when we go out, gives me plenty of kisses, gives me sweet loving sex. But he just doesnt seem to hold any sort of aggression. Hold it, i know its a good thing. The thing is, i love rough sex. Spanking, domination, Whips and just all round rough sex. Think 50 Shades of Grey without the bad literature. I did talk to him about it, but he just cant bring himself to do it. Its really sweet, but sex in the bedroom is getting quite boring.\n\nI met a new guy a year back and we have been chatting recently. Well, yeah you guessed it. Hes a kind of a bad boy. Unlike Mr Deer, hes quite the manly man. Muscles, the great hair- just imagine a lion. yeah. hes quite like that. After dating a passive male for the past 6 years, i was drawn to him like a moth to a flame. For the whole year, we have been talking on and off, but the UST (underlying sexual tension for those people who dont know) Has been super intense and one day i did the unthinkable and i slept with Mr Lion. but OH MY GOD. it was the best sex i ever had.\n\nThe thing is, i never really was ready for a serious relationship but somehow Mr Deer and i just kinda escalated way too fast. I honestly dont think things would work out with Mr Lion. So i'm just sitting over here, behind my screen feeling like a slut while two men shower their love over me.\n\nWhat should i do?", "summary": "Should i stick to passive sex ( Mr Deer) for the rest of my life or go for aggressive sex ( Mr Lion) ?"}
{"id": "t3_27j118", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My father is making me [24F] have a civil wedding with my fianc\u00e9 [26M] with rules to follow!", "post": "I overheard my father talking stating he is going to make my fianc\u00e9 and I get a civil wedding however rules will have to follow. Due to the fact that my parents are caribbean and catholic living together before marriage is out of the question however my fianc\u00e9 and I are in a long distance relationship. So following this civil wedding we are still not allowed to live together. He is making this VERY difficult and extremely embarrassing for me because this just adds another burden to my relationship with my man and we already have enough issues going on between us. I also fear this will just break us apart. What shall I do? \n\nI am currently fishing up grad school my fianc\u00e9 is working two jobs and we are short in money but we are working towards saving our money together into an account and begin wedding planning and the future together. My mother is supportive of us so is his parents (whom where in a long distance relationship as well) its just my father thats making everything so difficult. Its either I choose him and his rules or I go against him and make way with my fiance and he cuts all ties with me as well as my extended family.", "summary": "My father wants  me to have a civil wedding but still not be with my \"husband\". Till he thinks I am ready"}
{"id": "t3_2s2m8d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "20f having trouble coping with complicated breakup with 19m, please help", "post": "I'm feeling tremendous guilt and I'm someone with a heavy conscience and guilt nearly cripples me.  Long story short, my boyfriend never communicated with me which led to problems I didn't know we were even having.  This led him to lie to me.  I found out, flipped shit, hit him, and broke up with him.  \n\nI feel awful for losing control and hitting him.  I hate that I hurt him.  The relationship damage was done before I ever even touched him.  I was going to break up with him anyway.  I wish I'd stayed calm and just broke up with him instead of acting on my feelings of utter betrayal.  \n\nAs if getting over a betrayal and a breakup isn't bad enough, but now I feel crippling guilt over hitting him.  I feel like I'm not even allowed to be upset with the way he single-handedly ruined our relationship before I made the awful mistake of hitting him.\n\nHow do I get past these complicated feelings? (inb4 therapy, because that's a given)", "summary": "boyfriend lied, hit him, broke up with him. can't get past feelings of guilt to even begin handling the pain of a breakup to begin with"}
{"id": "t3_54huub", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it weird to give a dog the same name as one of my (25F) coworkers (22F)?", "post": "Short and simple one here, folks. All names, both canine and human, are fake. My fiance (26M) and I are likely adopting a dog who is currently named \"Pearl.\" We're both really into Roman mythology, and would like to rename the dog \"Minerva.\" \n\nIt just so happens that I have a coworker named Minerva. We're not on the same team, nor are we friends, so I really don't talk to her that much, although we are Facebook friends. Given that it's a small office, I do see her often, and I'm kind of worried that it might be awkward when it gets back to her that we named our dog \"after her.\" She'll definitely see our posts on Facebook.", "summary": "Am I being weird and paranoid? My fiance and I both love the name Minerva for our future rescue dog, but I feel like it's awkward because I have a coworker named Minerva."}
{"id": "t3_3f1hve", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my co-worker [26 M], apparently has a girl friend in office and I am other woman", "post": "So I am new at a lab and haven't really had the lay of the land. I generally keep my head down and focus on my work.\n\nHowever, I found a real connection with one of my colleagues. We would often stay late and work together on tests. It was easy and flirty, comfortable like I was hanging out with a good friend. It was obvious he was coming on to me - texting me to hang late at night, resting his hand on mine, going for long walks at night and buying me lunch out of the blue- we even went to a concert together as we like the same type of jazz.  I was hesitant to get involved with a colleague, but my girlfriends said to trust my gut and if I felt something, go for it. I finally gave in and asked him to dinner. We kissed and I was over the moon. I felt sparks and like it was right. \n\nCut to the very next day at work and me finding out that he apparently is in a committed relationship with another female in the office. I feel terrible. Idiotic, stupid and guilty. I have never been the \"other woman\" before, even unknowingly. I immediately cut off all ties with him as soon as I heard and have no intentions of ever speaking to him when we aren't wearing our white lab jackets. \n\nI feel terrible, like I was duped. All of the possibility and feelings I had been denying myself due to the work relationship have surfaced. The potential of what could've been hurts, not to mention losing a close friend who deceived me and the guilt and shame I feel everyday coming to the lab. I can't even make eye contact with the receptionist now.", "summary": "How do I get over unknowingly being the \"other woman\"? Am I obligated to tell her? How do I ease guilty conscious?"}
{"id": "t3_3ax08p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my gf [21 F] ~4years, At an Impasse, need advice.", "post": "background : I have been dating Sarah for almost 4 years now, since the start of university. We have had some conflicts in the past, but I still have feelings for her.\n\nI met someone(Rose) this past month. Someone who makes me feel happy like I haven't in a long time. I had begun to think that I was alone in how different I was from other people, but the scariest thing happened to first time we actually talked - EVERYTHING that she said just resonated wholeheartedly with me. It was like the world had created a copy of myself, a perfect match for me to find happiness. She makes me want to be social if only to spend time with her, which is a huge thing for me since I am so introverted.\n\nBut do I deserve it? I have been nothing but an asshole to Sarah lately, even though she has done everything to try to make things better or even accept my terrible faults. Do I deserve happiness when it would come at the cost of extreme sadness for her? I know that the answer that is yes, but I just don't know how I can do that to her. She has been with me through everything that I have went through, and made huge sacrifices to make it work between us... We have a real connection and even though it is strained sometimes, there are still some real feelings there,,, aren't there? Fuck I don't even know. I feel like my head is jumbled up and nothing I can do can clear my mind.\n\nI feel like I am at a crossroads and my next decision will impact who I am as a person and what I end up like. On one hand I could pursue happiness with Rose at the cost of Sarah's sadness, with no guarantees that me and Rose would work out anyways; or I can accept my lot in life and live a life that might be good, but never great...\n\nI don't know how next week is going to go... I am going to see Sarah for the first time in a month, and I don't know how I can look at her and not feel terrible for this emotional cheating that I have and still am committing.", "summary": "In a long-term relationship, just met someone new while on a business trip, don't know how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_20ieoj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my boyfriend [23M] together 1 year, jealous of his ex...", "post": "Hello!\n\nI know I have no right to feel the way I feel but I can't help it... I won't to get over it and I need your help.\n\nSo here we go... We have been together for one year and things are going great. He's generous, kind, funny, handsome, etc everything you could possibly want in a man.\n\nI am the problem. He is my first real boyfriend and he has a lot more experience than I do... At first, it did not matter at all. But now, it's starting to hurt... I don't care about his experience per se, I know he had a life before me. When we started dating, he had just broken up with his long-term girlfriend (of over four years) a few months before.\n\nShe left him (silly girl...) and they have not contacted each other since. I am not worried at all about our relationship because he's never given me any reason to doubt him. But for some reason it still hurts... Because had things gone his way they would probably still be dating right now.\nBecause he does not say anything to me he has not already said to her. Because the way he looks at me is just the ways he used to look at her. Because for four years she was the most important personne in his life and now I feel like I can't compete. I feel like a second choice and I know it makes no sense for me to feel that way...\n\nThey have four years of memories together, four years I know nothing about. (Maybe that's what bothers me?)\n\nI think he wants to start talking to her again. Probably because he wants to show he has forgiven her. Nothing to worry about. Except I do... It hurts.\n\nIt's not something I think about everyday, but it hurts every time she is mentionned. \n\nI am aware that it all sounds crazy and I want to get over it, which why I'm asking for help, so please be kind to me...", "summary": "My boyfriend is wonderful but I can't seem to come to terms with the fact he had a serious girlfriend before me. I know this is crazy and I'm here to get advice on how to stop being so stupid."}
{"id": "t3_241g1j", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Help a victim out who's been scammed by a Redditor...", "post": "Long story short...u/andyootoo posted a submission, telling people that he has tickets to a show in SF for sale, but he has to sell them online since he's in NY. The tickets for this show are sold out, so I decide to trust him. After a few back and forth exchanges via email, and seeing proof that he does have the tickets, I decide to send him the money via Amazon gift card. The card's been redeemed, but the tickets that he promised to transfer to me via Ticketmaster never came. I had talked to Amazon, and they can't seem to do anything. The bank's investigating in the meantime as well.", "summary": "Trusted someone online, even though people say you shouldn't. Now, in the hole for $640. I have learned my lesson, but need help recovering my money from the Credit Union/Amazon."}
{"id": "t3_jsj66", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Y U NO JUMP ME??", "post": "Okay, so my boyfriend of 1.5 years (31, American) and I (24, female, Canadian) moved apart a week ago.  I am starting grad school in Canada and he has a new job in the States.  We agreed to try a 'long distance open relationship' as breaking up would be just too hard and neither of us wants to make the other feel trapped indefinitely.  However, we are already really missing each other.\n\nWhile spending time at my mum's place before moving for school, I went out with friends and surprisingly met a man (33, English) who's attractive, intelligent, and very personable.  My boyfriend claimed to be fine with this, so I decided to meet the English guy for drinks.  \n\nWe had a good time and everything felt really natural.  We openly discussed relationships and I talked quite a lot about my boyfriend.   At first I was unsure what I wanted but as the night progressed I thought more and more that I would be comfortable having a fling with this guy.\n\nHe was a real gentleman to the point where he insisted on paying for everything, held doors open, showed me his place, drove me home, and didn't even try to kiss me.  I'm unaccustomed to guys who don't make a move, and I'm not sure whether he's just not interested in casual sex, or is trying to be sensitive to the fact that I'm clearly hung-up on my boyfriend. \n\nDo you guys have insight into his motivations?", "summary": "I've met someone I'm casually interested in but am unsure whether I scared him off with talk of my boyfriend.  I'd also be interested in any general advice on how to make a long distance open relationship as easy as possible."}
{"id": "t3_12lkx5", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Nothing Ever Changes", "post": "Ever since I was in high school I have just been focused on working hard and getting to a college and my life would be set. Hell I even knew that this delusional way of thinking was wrong and I would constantly remind myself that life should be more of the journey to get the goal rather than fast forwarding to that point.\n\nI couldn't do it though. I never really had any friends worth giving a shit about and I could never stop thinking about getting to a better place. I just became more and more cynical and pessimistic. I continued to push through though. Past through the foggy haze of emotions.\n\nMy family and I are very distant b/c of a language barrier (english is my dominant and spanish is there second so I can't articulate as clearly) and I disagree with a lot of their conservative views. \n\nNow I'm in my second year of college doing relatively well in grades, and great health and fitness. But I just can't help but feel lonlier than ever. I've never had a real relationship with the opposite sex and everytime I've tried talking to a girl I just feel like we never have anything in common or that they're way out of my league. Which consequently makes me feel even more alienated and depressed.\n\nI've tried going to parties to socialize and sure it feels great for that short time but afterwards I realize that there was never really anyone to get intimate with and share my feelings with.", "summary": "I'm a human who is a slave to his emotions and I need to someone to be intimate with. I also lack any confidence to get a girl to be interested in me"}
{"id": "t3_bnwlk", "subreddit": "self", "title": "You know how they say Redditors are all alike? (White male 18-24 etc.) Well how many others share this trait with me?", "post": "My whole life I've been on the internet. I think it's absolutely incredible. But what I realized tonight is that that's where I have adopted my sense of culture and belonging from. I feel at-odds with the actual people around me (Americans) and their culture, whereas I feel as if I can actually express myself and have people listen to me on the internet and have an intellectual conversation. Everyone around me makes subtle sarcastic remarks about certain things that make me slightly \"different\" from them, but I think that they're strange too. I only really feel at home, feel like part of a community, on sites like Reddit (or everything2, or /r9k/ or totse, or the various forums and clans I've joined in the past). I can't be the only one like this.", "summary": "I learned my culture from the internet rather than from those around me. When I hang out with people, both parties get a bit of culture shock."}
{"id": "t3_1j0f2j", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I'm naturally decent at art but I get frustrated and never finish anything. Help!", "post": "Hi Reddit,\n\nI'd like to make painting and drawing one of my hobbies, but I almost always feel frustrated enough to quit after spending X amount of time on a project. I spend a lot of time working on details, and as soon as I realize it's not coming out as well as I imagined it I start getting annoyed.\n\nThis causes me to pretty much not like painting, drawing, starting art projects, and art in general. I'd love to like art because I feel I have potential to improve my natural ability a lot, and I even get excited when I start projects. However, this problem is getting to the point where I'm thinking about just not starting any art projects at all.\n\n(Btw I'm not interested in taking my skills any further than just a free-time hobby)\n\nDoes anyone have any experience overcoming anything like this? Should I learn to love it or just stop starting projects? I'd love to hear your advice!", "summary": "I like the idea of creating art, and I have natural ability, but I get really frustrated in the process and give up, hating art altogether. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_16osc8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Mid-life crisis? [M35]  How to deal.", "post": "I hope to live past 70, but my wife [34] of 15 years thinks I'm going through such a life-event.\n\nNot long ago, I brought up the idea of divorce and the results were terrible.  There was yelling.  Smashing of dishes.  Now she doesn't even trust me at all.  I really wish I could take it back, and go back to the way things were before.\n\nI've never cheated.  I don't watch pornography.  I don't have female friends because they always seem to get too close.\n\nI've now quit my job and promised to build my own business at home.\n\nI supported her for a decade, but now moved my finances into both names and made myself financially dependent on her.  I hope this will show I have no intention of leaving or cheating.\n\nI work out for 2 hours a day, mostly to make myself too tired to consider other relationships or sex.  My gym wanted me to model for their promotions, but I knew that would make her uncomfortable so I declined.\n\nI do not go anywhere without her.  I even decline when her friends ask me to dance.\n\nShe lost her best friend over me and doesn't know it.  I feel terrible.  We would all three meet together, but she suddenly stopped talking to my wife and started texting me... asking if I would meet her alone.  I cut off all ties before anything happened.\n\nI care for my wife very much and don't want to lose her over a stupid phase.\n\nI suppose I worry too much because I regret never having children or sex.  I have never had a place of my own.  We don't have sex and I have accepted I never will.  She is happy just being held, but she has issues with doing anything more and I have never wanted to coerce her into feeling guilty.", "summary": "I want to be less selfish.  I need practical ways to avoid temptations and to gain my wife's trust."}
{"id": "t3_u7037", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I am destroyed", "post": "I don't mean to mine reddit for sympathy but today my relationship of 4.5 years fell apart out of the blue. \n\nWere both in our early 20s, me (23) and her (22) have been best friends throughout the whole thing. She moved in with me very shortly after we started dating (maybe a month after) and we have lived together ever since, at 3 different places. We've never had any issues at all and are ridiculously compatible. Feeling somewhat pressured by her family, subtle hints from her and my own wants, i asked her to marry me 6 mos ago to which she absolutely responded yes.\n\nLately (about 2 mos. ago) I've started an overnight position to make the money I need to make her happy and since about a month ago, she has become increasingly distant. I always am the first to say \"I love you\" and make the first move. Our sex life has dwindled rapidly and she just doesn't really speak her mind. I didn't think too much of it, given our history, and figured once my schedule changed (which is due within the next 2 weeks) that things would go back to normal.\n\nThis morning I woke up to her crying and knew instantly what was up. Long story short she told me it wasn't going to work and she couldn't in good conscience marry me knowing there's a chance that this could happen later than sooner. When asked if there was any chance of repair she said no. She says she needs time to grow as her own person. She's staying with a friend right now to see if some time apart will change things, but judging by the note she left it's not looking good.\n\nWe share everything, even all our friends. We DONT HAVE different friends. We have so many things amongst us I don't know how we will ever split it up. What about our cat?! What about our home??? I'm so lost as to who I even am without her. Am I done for? Reddit help :'(", "summary": "my soulmate who was attached to my hip up and left me today out of nowhere and I'm totally lost as to how I'm going to handle it. Wondering where to go from here."}
{"id": "t3_2qi7en", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22M] have a very intimidating face. What to do?", "post": "Everytime I go out on the streets people give me strange angry looks. When I'm at social events people are afraid to come talk to me or make conversation (and I always need to intiate).\n\nBefore you start saying I'm paranoid, I asked my friends and people i know what their first impressions of me were when they first looked at me. They all said I was intimidating and they don't know why.\n\nI'm a shy and reserved person but very kind once you get to know me. I'm neither ugly or extremely beautiful just average looking. I'm also very skinny.\n\nAny ideas what to do?", "summary": "I have intimidating look about me which makes it jard for people to approach me or they dislike me for no reason. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_rrbaf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "A serious question about what could be in heaven, and how we might make the world better.", "post": "So when I consider the concept of heaven, as described in nearly every religious doctrine, I think of an endless expanse where the human soul of every living person resides in peace and happiness. \nAnd we can say with certainty that the soul is something other than our body, as it's what drives us but supposedly leaves our body upon death. From this we can reason that the soul has no mass and is able to fit inside any space an infinite number of times.\nWith the physical logistics covered, now I ask- what would it be like in heaven? We can speculate a thousand different outcomes but what is the common theme across every religious text? It's Good.\nPersonally when I think of good I think of everyone benefiting each other and no one is hurting and everyone can live and grow in peace. Yet somehow people consider others' actions, that don't directly effect them negatively, are the cause for non-related tragedies. At this point I'm speaking specifically about the extreme Christians' stance on homosexuality. And it's when people consider themselves harmed in any way it's natural that they'll fight back, and so we see blow-back in the middle east and prejudice in the US (unfortunately this is by much more superstitious people that convinced themselves gays hurt others because of personal identification in the same way they can cure cancer through inaction [prayer]). Clearly there are other examples in racial prejudice in the same way and I'm not going to claim expertise in foreign affairs if someone better informed would like to comment. But to me the world would be more like heaven if everyone understood and accepted others' lives for all they're worth, not even that everyone should donate their time and money but at least not force themselves on others in any way.", "summary": "Would it be better to live to get into heaven, or bring heaven onto earth and live there? And how can we do it?"}
{"id": "t3_2osgyh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Love interest [21 F] agrees with everything I [21 M] say [3 months] and I've almost completely lost interest for this reason.", "post": "So I have come out of a 2 year relationship with girl of the same age recently. \n\nI have been seeing someone I've known for quite a while shortly after the whole thing ended.\n\nIn previous relationship girlfriend and I didn't see eye to eye on a lot of things. \n\nMaking a lot of fun debates with varied outcomes.\n\nThis girl I've been seeing agrees with EVERYTHING I say. \n\nI even play devils advocate to see if she'll agree with me. Example:\n\n\"X by Kafka is great!\", I'll say.\n\n\"Yes, Kafka is one of the best writers ever\"\n\n\"Oh, I only like this book, I think all his other work is mediocre.\" (Me \nplaying devils advocate fyi)\n\n\"Yeah, I think a lot of his books are quite depressing so I'm not really a fan of that kind of thing myself\".\n\nIt is so dumb, but she agrees with everything. \n\nI like her physically and everything, and she's a very sweet girl, but this kind of submission is the biggest turn-off for me ever. \n\nIt is the same effect as hearing your own voice on camera and cringing where you hear it.\n\nShe even does it to kind of 'impress' me. I'll google the name of some extremely obscure Polish composer or something, and she'll pretend she knows the guy, clearly reading off wikipedia just as I am. \n\nShe really overestimates my intelligence, but pretending to know something is a form of lying and I hate that.\n\nSo I wanna cool the whole thing off. \n\nYou can probably guess, this girl is really submissive and would react badly if I was really cold with her. \n\nShe's kind of in love I think, but must be kidding herself, as given her experience with me, she cannot truly know me.\n\nWhat's the best way to deal with it? \n\nDo I just cool it off right away because she has attachment issues? \n\nDo I tell her, but in effect calling her out on telling lies?", "summary": "Love interest agrees with everything and poses to impress me; I'm not impressed as this is kind of obnoxious; Wanna cool it off because it just implies she's kind of needy."}
{"id": "t3_2kijfs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17M] with my friend [17 F] Possible FWB relationship advice please.", "post": "Yesterday I went out to eat with one of my female friends( ill call her Andrea)from school(we go out to eat often) we talked about relationships and she said how she thinks highschool relationships are stupid and pointless she said she would much rather prefer a Fuckbuddy and we discussed highschool relationships from a third person perspective amd FWB relationships.\n\n When I took her home she asked,me if I was a virgin and unfortunately I told the truth which was that I was.She disclosed that she wasn't a virgin by this time I was already at her car and we departed. Should I follow up? I like her a little bit but not enough to ruin a FWB relationship? Sorry if this is,the wrong thread.", "summary": "Female friend brings up wanting to be in a FWB relationship and I am,curious as to if her purpose of bringing it up was because we are close or she wants the D."}
{"id": "t3_1qcqke", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] possibly dating friend [21F] ...can I ask her if we're exclusive/in a relationship etc.?", "post": "My friend and I have basically started dating ...the other night I took her out for a drive to the beach late at night, we had a bite of food, some wine ..we ending up making out for a while (we have a long complicated history and she liked me for a while even when she was with her ex boyfriend). I took her back home, we continued to make out by her door and then by my car. I've met her parents we get along fine. The next day we meet up for a walk (we go on walks every week cause we live close by) and towards the end we start making out again. Now the next day I invite her over to my place and we hang out for a bit ...play piano for each other (we've never heard each other play). I walk her to the station and we kiss before she leaves. \n\nNow here is my problem, she has an ex boyfriend that she is still friends with who lives in the city and hence has a place that is convenient to stay at overnight. Now I've already asked her to give me a call before she heads over there but I don't know exactly what to say to her? Should I clarify that we're exclusive? Is that rushing things? \n\nI just want to know how to clarify what is going on between us and that she isn't going to do something with him without sounding insulting ...as if she's going to sleep with him just because she's staying over. Advice is welcome.", "summary": "friend and I have started dating (?) and she's staying at her ex's for a night. Should I be worried? How do I bring this up without sounding accusatory? Do I even have a right to be worried?"}
{"id": "t3_yqyoc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I need your help. I'm moving in with my boyfriend next month and I have weird bathroom phobias. How do you mask that you are \"doing the doo\"?", "post": "This is a throwaway account for several reason. My boyfriend loves to frequent reddit and I'd die of embarrassment if he even knew I cared about this.\n\nI have several weird bathroom rituals and one of the things I absolutely cannot stand is having to use a bathroom in public. Especially if it's number two. To be honest, the idea of another human hearing me use the bathroom or even smelling it would be a worse fate for me than being eaten alive by Vashta Nerada. \n\nI'm supposed to be moving in with him at the beginning of October. We've been planning this quite awhile as I'm over at his house enough to be considered already living there. Sometimes, I even spend the night. But I have never *used* the bathroom at his house. Like, I've used it, but never *used* it. His bathroom is placed adjacent from the living room so I have never tested the theory that you could hear what was going on in there or not. He has room mates with girlfriends, so I can tell you that the walls are very, *very* thin. \n\nAs a child, I grew up in a house where each bedroom (three bedroom house) had its own bathroom and we also had a guest bathroom. I have never experienced having to number two outside my own bathroom. When I got older, I even requested the master bedroom over my room mate to have my own bathroom, so this has never changed for me. Now, I'm about to be sharing a bathroom with a guy I've been dating for almost a year. \n\nMy question is **how do I keep my boyfriend from knowing what I am doing in the bathroom when I'm using it for number two? How can I mask any smells or noises without bringing it to his attention? What if I have to use the bathroom when he has a lot of friends over (he has a ton of friends that frequent on the weekend to play videogames and watch football).", "summary": "Girlfriend moving in with boyfriend. Too scared to let him know I'm shitting. How do I hide the fact I'm shitting in his bathroom?"}
{"id": "t3_4k8fvj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (F25) boyfriend (M26) of 2 years just told me he is manipulative", "post": "I have been with this guy for 2 years. Yesterday, he told me that before we go any further in the relationship, I should know that he is very manipulative. I haven't even thought of him like that before. So obviously, the first thing I did was go on Google to see if anyone else has been in my situation before. I couldn't find anything similar, but I found a lot of articles on how to see if your partner is a manipulator. Most of the things on the manipulator check list aren't in our relationship. However, I spotted 2 that is very obvious: I am almost always wrong in any argument we have and he points out things about myself that I should improve. However, I have never really felt any emotional distress in the time period I was with him. One thing I notice however is that he puts a lot of emphasis on how he looks (grooming, clothing) and yet very little emphasis on appearances of things like car or house. Basically, I am just really confused. I don't understand why he told that he is manipulative and yet, I can't find convincing signs that he is. Maybe he doesn't understand what manipulative means ? Maybe it's some next level manipulation ? Maybe I am just too blind to see it ? He often tells me that I am too naive and that I shouldn't trust people so easily, him included. He is lawyer, I don't know if that helps with anything.", "summary": "My boyfriend told me he is manipulative. However, I can't find any convincing signs that he is.  Am I just too naive to see it? What is he hoping for by telling me this?"}
{"id": "t3_4hs04c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (20M) and my girlfriend (19F) ran into my ex (20F) on campus and now she's acting weird", "post": "My Girlfriend (19F) and I (20M) were walking my dog around campus when we walked past my ex (20F)\n\nWe have no hard feelings for each other since we broke up about a year ago so I wasn't gonna be rude and just ignore her. We exchanged heys, but then she stopped to pet my dog introduce herself to my girlfriend\n\nAfter a very quick conversation she left and we started to walk back to the car. My girlfriend hardly spoke on the way back and left for her place shortly after we made it to mine.\n\nShe came back later that night still hardly speaking and started to cry a little. I tried ask he what was wrong but I couldn't get it out of her. \n\nShe didn't move from the couch until this morning and still isn't speaking. Why do you think she's upset and what should I do about it?", "summary": "My girlfriend (19F) and I (20M) ran into my ex on campus and after we had a quick casual conversation with her my girlfriend is giving me the silent treatment. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3a8wp1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "my favorite singer [29/m] bootycalled me [20/f]. can i initiate another hookup with him or do i let him make the moves?", "post": "Ok, fair warning that this may be kind of long.\n\nI'm studying abroad, and back in April I went to a show of my favorite band. After the show, I spoke for a little bit with the lead singer, and at the end he told me to add him on Facebook so he could pass along events going on in our city. At the beginning of May, he finally accepted my friend request and sent me a bunch of information about the events, and I told him to let me know if he was going to any of them. He told me he would or that we would plan something else and that he has a cool terrace at his house. He said he would be in town for the next two weeks, and I told him to let me know when it would be good for him. He never ended up messaging me.\n\nFast forward to a week ago, his band had a show scheduled and I wasn't able to get tickets before they sold out. I message him telling my problem and that I'm leaving Brazil soon and I want to see them before I go. He messages me back saying he can put my name on the list for the show and that he was sorry for never letting me know when it would be good for me to come over to his house and if I wanted, the invitation still stood. I thanked him and said I accepted the invitation. He messages me the next night asking if I was free and tells me to come over to his house. I do. We walk to go buy beer, he shows me a super pretty view of the city and kisses me, and we go back to his house and have sex. The whole time he was super sweet and caring with me, and I had a really nice time with him. A few days later, I go to his show and talk with him a little afterwards again. At the end, he asks when I'm leaving Brazil and tells me see you soon.", "summary": "My favorite singer bootycalled me. I want to hookup with him again, but I don't know if this was just a one night stand kind of thing. Should I initiate anything or let him call the shots?"}
{"id": "t3_4n7ebk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[25M] My girlfriend [25F] is still friends and keeps in contact with past crushes and former FWB's. I do not suspect any foul play, but I still feel weird.", "post": "We've been together for 8 months, she has been with 11 guys sexually before me, and me 10, and she'll still keep in contact with former FWB's or crushes. She's very low maintenance, and sometimes I'll actually meet some of these guys. I can put on a good face and be cordial, but afterwards, I feel all weird. Like insecure as if she would run away from me for these guys. I feel I am in the right for feeling this way, but I do not want to be needy with her and tell her she has to stop talking to these guys once in a while. Is she just looking for attention? She'll talk to at least one of them a few times a month, but mostly not more than that.", "summary": "25M] My girlfriend [25F] is still friends and keeps in contact with past crushes and former FWB's. I do not suspect any foul play, but I still feel weird."}
{"id": "t3_2diwdm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my Girlfriend [21F] of 2 months, thinks that I like the idea of a girlfriend rather than her", "post": "While we've only been in a proper relationship for 2 months we've been romantically involved one way or another for the past 6 months. Yesterday she said there was something she wanted to ask me but felt horrible asking it so never ended up asking me. Today I convinced her that it was best for our interests that she just comes out and says it. She was unable to say it over Skype so she just sent me a text, the text said \"Sometimes I get slightly paranoid that like sometimes I think that you might like the idea of having a girlfriend or just having a girlfriend more than you actually like me as a person\".\n\nFirst and foremost I love this girl so much, I'd do anything for her and it hurt me a little that she thinks this. I tried to explain to her how much I like her and there's no one else in the world I'd want to be with but no matter what I say she says the doubt is still in her mind.\n\nI have a feeling that she might be insecure about our relationship because she told me that someone had told her that I wanted to have sex with her when I first met her (this is from one of my friends crazy ex's and is not true). I really like her and I want to make this work but what ever I say she doesn't seem to listen to me, how can I make her believe that I think she is the most amazing person in the world and I want to be with her, not the idea of a relationship?", "summary": "Girlfriend thinks I just like the idea of a girlfriend rather than her, how can I convince her this is wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_f8g9v", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Reddit, I fucking love you but you're killing me.", "post": "You've basically become the internet for me, which is fine and all, but sitting here hour upon hour, day upon day frittering away my underemployment clicking on random cartoons and reading weird over-sharing posts that are neither enlightening or even very interesting, is basically like sitting at the breakfast table and reading the Capn' Crunch box. It's an enormous waste of fucking time. Sorry. \nYou're killing me. My attention span has been reduced to 3 nanoseconds and I blame you and your incessant comments and updates. \n\nI'm going to check in the next few days to see if the guy giving away the amp writes me back, but other than that I am fucking DONE. No more. The only time I'm coming back is when I have something to post that will genuinely benefit other humans. \n\nFor those of you anxiously awaiting my cookbook, rest easy papitos. It's in the works. You'll be the first to know. :)", "summary": "Had some great times on here but it's has slowly taken over my life. Need to cut the cord. Only coming back to post."}
{"id": "t3_41bp5p", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "[US] Declined for a credit card I was pre-approved for. Is it worth calling the bank asking for more information?", "post": "Hello,\n\nBackground info on myself - I'm a fresh college grad looking for a first credit card away from my parents. I have a credit score of 789 (according to Chase, who declined my credit card application, 785 according to my most recent inquiry on creditkarma). I have had a credit card in my name for the last 11 years with a $6500 spending limit that I have been using for gas and small purchases, which is paid off in full every month by my parents, so I don't have any late payments on my credit score. I also have a student loan on my credit report, which has been paid off within the 6-mo no interest grace period. \n\nBackground on the situation - I was pre-approved for the Chase Sapphire Preferred Card about a month ago when I opened a bank account. 2 weeks ago I applied online, and a week ago I was denied for \"Few revolving accounts opened long enough to establish credit history, Not enough accounts opened long enough to establish a credit history.\"     My understanding is that these reasons basically mean I haven't had credit history for long enough. Which is very strange considering I was pre-approved, nothing new has come up in my credit report since then, and I've had a decent sized spending limit credit card opened for 11 years, and a loan which had been opened for a few years.\n\nMy question is - Is it worth it to contact Chase for more information? Is it possible that there was some sort of mistake? Or is normal for someone of my credit record?\n\nSide question - If there's no point in contacting Chase about it, what are some other cards you might recommend? I was looking at the Capital One Venture Rewards card or the CO VentureOne Rewards Card.", "summary": "I was declined for a card I was pre-approved for, and seems to be within my range of cards I should be able to get. Is it worth it to contact the company about it?"}
{"id": "t3_1ke2y7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25M] first ever relationship [28F] ended 3 months ago. It was emotionally abusive and draining but I still can't say I'm fine with it.", "post": "Hey there.\n\nI guess there isn't anything new to say other than what I have posted in my previous posts with this account. I had my first ever relationship and it ended 3 months ago mostly due to her moving abroad. It was emotionally abusive and for every \"good\" thing related with it, there were around 50 \"bad\" things associated with it.\n\nThe thing is that whenever I have some \"free time\" or anytime I recollect myself, I find myself thinking about her. I've initiated NC and while she has called 2-3 times (with a time difference of two weeks to a month) I never answered the phone.* I'd like to think that it's for the best but I'm not so sure given the following circumstances:\n\nI'm not delusional. I know now and I've known since the very first days of the breakup that no matter how hard we (I) tried things would never change in this particular relationship. Even in my \"darkest\" moments after the breakup I never thought that if we give it another go at it things might end up differently. No, they will always remain the way they were.\n\nThe scary part is that in my current state I keep thinking that I would be *better* with that relationship rather than having nothing. I do admit I'm insecure and suffering from low self-esteem but... that much?\n\nHow do I move forward fixing this? How do I let go of something that even my brain says that it really isn't worth it? Thanks in advance for reading.\n\n* = I do find it curious that even though she has called 2-3 times, she has me blocked on skype for the past ~3 months (she blocked me around 10 days after leaving the country and without any reason). Even though it serves no practical reason... any thoughts on that?", "summary": "= Three months out of my [25M] first relationship [28F]. It was emotionally abusive and draining. I never thought that by trying again we could achieve better outcome but... I'm still clinging to it apparently."}
{"id": "t3_3dugak", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] with my Fiance [35 F] 2.5 years, is sexting with an old friend. Please Help!!", "post": "So, we both started new jobs at the same time. She had to go away for a month to go to training. It was very stressful for her. She came back worn out and exhausted. I was there for her, supported her in everything she needed. One day we got into a fight, and she started talking to an old friend of hers. (he lives out of state, has an unhappy marriage, and a kid) I saw what she wrote. She said she wanted to be with him. That i am an idiot. The you \"gets me\". \n\nI got very suspicious, and started looking at her messages to him. She deleted a lot, but when i could some. A lot of them were about me, and how Im careless, and how now she is rethinking everything. Eventually i saw it start to get sexual. How she likes it in bed. How she thinks about him. How she wants to be with him. I confronted her about how i notice something is wrong. and how i think something is happening between them. She laughed in my face. Told me that there is nothing to worry about and they don't, and will never have a relationship like that, but i know what i saw. \n\nThis led me to investigate further, I found one picture of him naked in the recently deleted folder. I sent the picture to myself. I now have concrete proof something is happening. She keeps telling me there is nothing to worry about. She get annoyed and starts yelling when ever i bring this up. She has been away on business so i texted her, that i know something is up, and she needs to tell me the truth. \n\nI want to prepare myself for this,  she is very manipulative and she can back me into a corner, and turn this around on me in an instant. Im really hurt and i dont know what to do. I would feel stupid trying to salvage this relationship, but i feel stupid throwing it away as well. I dont even know what to do.", "summary": "Fiance is sexting with her old friend of 20 years. I found a picture to prove it. What should i do next?"}
{"id": "t3_3y1ca5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my bf [21M] for 1.5 year, having troubles and are ldr over christmas break, need some insight.", "post": "First of, excuse my bad language as english is not my original language. \n\n\u00a0\n\nSo I recently found out that my bf have had a secret flirtation with his ex over the last three months. He has been lying about it, and I am feeling really hurt. I no longer trust him. I really do love him, and want to forgive him and move passed it. \n\n\u00a0\n\nAt first he was really apologetic, and wanted to do anything to make it up to me again. I go to school where he lives, but my family is in another city. So I had to leave for christmas break only two days after I found out. With all of my trust issues and me feeling hurt this has taken a toll on our relationship. He now feels exhausted, and don't want to work on making it better. Instead he made me feel guilty for beeing hurt and making a big deal out of it. And now im alone trying to fix things, that he broke, and i feel really alone.  \n\n\u00a0\n\nBefore I left for the holidays he promised we would call each other every day.  And we have done so once in the five days i have been home. I asked him tonight if he wanted to talk to me for a bit, I even gave him a call. But he just turned me down. And said he dont feel like talking.  \n\n\u00a0\n\nI don't know what to do. I am sad, lonely, and feeling worthless. It's like he don't even care about me or my feelings anymore. I am afraid to say anything, but i want to talk to him about all of this. But I don't know how, or what to say. I am afraid he'll get more distant if I do.  \n\n\u00a0\n\nI really don't want to break up with this guy. So please reddit, I only need some insight and help in understanding all of this.", "summary": "boyfriend been flirting with his ex and lying about it. wanted to make it better at first, but has grown distant after me leaving town for the holidays."}
{"id": "t3_1bf0gw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Can I ask my ex, who I work with, to quit?", "post": "Ok so I [25M] work with my ex [21F] and things have gotten pretty bad. She turned 21, said she wanted a little time apart but swore we were going to be fine and get back together. Two weeks later she tells me she doesn't want to be in a relationship with anyone, doesn't want to be tied down, and is enjoying the single life. She also informed me that she had started sleeping with someone else a week after we split. And yesterday I worked with her and found out she has a new boyfriend. Working with her has become extremely difficult and usually results in conversations I'd rather not have, and I'm general is a distraction. This job is something I'm highly invested in while for her it is merely a paycheck that she doesn't need because she doesn't pay bills or rent. Am I totally out of line if I ask her to consider leaving? I feel like it would be best for all parties.", "summary": "I work with my ex at a job she cares very little about and that I'm trying to build a career off of, can I ask her to consider quitting?"}
{"id": "t3_4a5yqx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by falling for a sex joke at a burger joint. Somewhat NSFW", "post": "So, me and my buddies are walking around town looking for some dinner. We see a nice looking burger joint across the street and decide we want some of that greasy meat. Looking over the menu, I see a burger called The Juicy Lucy; a half pound of 100% beef stuffed with american cheese. I couldn't find any reason why that wouldn't be anything but fucking delicious, so I spend 7 bucks and get myself a Juicy Lucy. The guy at the register tells me it takes a little longer, which was totally fine. As I'm waiting, my friends get their burgers and another guy asks me what I ordered, noticing that my friends were eating and I wasn't. I told him I got a Juicy Lucy, he smiled and said, \"Oh, well that takes longer.\" Right, got it. So finally Lucy comes out and she looks absolutely scrumptious, dripping with grease and bulbous as all hell. I look at this monster and think, 'Wow, thats a lot of cheese and meat in there'. This is where I went wrong, see it wasn't just cheese and meat in there. I raise the burger to my mouth, and as I bite into it the punchline to the greatest pussy joke ever is revealed. Turns out Lucy is a squirter, because as soon as my teeth sunk into the patty, grease exploded out of the burger with ferocious velocity. At least an ounce or two of pure beef grease squirts directly into my eyes, all over my face, onto the table. Not only am I covered in grease but I just spent $8 on this shit. I sit there contemplating life and it hits me. Juicy Lucy takes a little longer to warm up, but when you give it a nibble there's a surprise for you, and it isn't just american cheese.", "summary": "The Juicy Lucy is a burger/pussy joke combo that squirts in your face when you take a bite."}
{"id": "t3_4duk3p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Mums ill and bros in care, I'm [21F] worried I'm too dependent on bf [23 M] of 6 yrs to help me cope", "post": "I'm new to this so go easy on me... I'll give some background first. Going back about 4 years to when my parents got a divorce, it was pretty messy my dad was an abusive alcoholic and my mum has pretty much no family other than us (the 'kids'). Looking back now I would say with certainty I was clinically depressed, I weighed about 7 stone and would be constantly anxious about everything. Pretty much the only thing that got me through that phase was my bf, he was somebody to vent to as I'm usually the happy go lucky one of the group and I'm also quite fiercely private so no one really knew what was happening in my home life. \n\nFast forward to the present and my mum has recently been diagnosed with bipolar and some form of delusion disorder, my younger brother is in care as I am at university and can't support him. I was the one who got her sectioned as I feared for my brothers safety and have very much been using all of my energy making sure everybody else is coping but I feel absolutely useless, I'm not sleeping and not eating again. My only outlet is my boyfriend and I'm so scared of being such a burden to him that he feels as though I'm not the fun loving girl he met. I try so hard to keep socialising with other people but atm it feels like everything I do is just like crawling through treacle. I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety (not much of a shock) and it's absolutely killing me being away from him (we're at unis in different cities).\n\n I honestly just feel so needy atm I just wanted to ask if any of you had been in a similar situation and if you have any advice as to how to get through this", "summary": "My mum has bipolar and my younger brother is in care. I'm in uni while trying to organise everything at home and feel like I can only talk to my bf about it."}
{"id": "t3_kjhfs", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Need advice, and maybe someone to talk to?", "post": "Hi guys, first post on reddit and also a throwaway account, so hopefully this goes alright.\n\nI've been feeling bummed out recently for seemingly no reason. I am fairly fortunate, but have low self esteem from a childhood as a fat nerdy kid that had troubles socialising.\n\nI've been noticing recently I've been angry a lot easier, and I am feeling less and less empathetic to people's problems. My Dad has been chatting to me about his job and the people he works with (he hates it, the people there put him down) and I try and listen but the more I listen the more I get stressed out, and I try and get out of these conversations (rude I know but I can't take listening to it for too long).\n\nMy friends also complain to me about things I just find trivial, and I get really annoyed at some of them because they are really quite fortunate money wise, or are just lazy and that's basically what's causing their problems. I never really complain about anything in particular to them, or when I do they make a big deal about it and basically make a joke out of what I'm talking about.\n\nAll this is probably not much of a big deal, especially compared to problems I've seen on here, but I'm not sure what to do. Anyone been in a similar situation? I wouldn't mind going to see a psychiatrist but I am saving money at the moment, and I don't earn much (part-time worker) and I hate asking my parents for money. Does anyone know if there are any schemes where I can go see someone to talk about this stuff? I'm a university student if that helps.", "summary": "I am irrationally angry, get frustrated when people confide in me or ask for my help, and also when I confide in people and don't get taken seriously."}
{"id": "t3_1kt78t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24F] am getting attached in an \"open relationship\" to a diffident geek[27M]", "post": "I am seeing this guy, and we entered on the basis of a casual relationship (both unable to commit to anything serious at the moment, but need cuddles). I'm getting very attached to him because he still says all the sweet things, we see each other multiple times a week and IM chats to each other for hours every day. \n\nThe closest way I can describe what we have is a best-friendship with sex, cuddles and companionship. He instigated much of this, as I wasn't sure if this fit into the \"not a relationship\" category, but he still insists he can't be in a relationship and that I can see other guys. I thought I could sleep with him without wanting more or exclusivity, but I just don't find myself able to sexually approach other men while seeing him and I got jealous when he saw another girl and they ended up cuddling, even though he said he's not looking for anything from her and is acceptable in our current arrangement.\n\nI was pretty sure it was just his depression that was holding him back from relationships (trying to protect me/him), but I'm wondering now if I'm a place holder for some girl he actually wants. He's so sweet and genuine, I find it hard to believe this myself, but I've been hurt too much before to think that things will work out.\n\nAny advice on what I should do?", "summary": "Agreed to not get serious. He gives me all the attention of a relationship, but doesn't want to be in one. I want a bit more exclusivity."}
{"id": "t3_2g1b93", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by zoning out in class", "post": "So I'm sitting in Spanish class going off of 4 hours of sleep from staying up all night preparing my chemistry lab. We were doing a group activity where we had to go around the room interviewing people in Spanish about their name, home town, phone number, etc. I finished before everyone else so I sit back down and wait for class to get over (about 2 minutes left). My professor gets my attention and asks me to read out loud to the class. Unfortunately in my hungover like state of mind from lack of sleep I failed to recognize what he said to me and sat there looking dumbfounded at my professor. A good 30 seconds to a minute goes by before he asks me again, and again I space out. Not sure of what I should do, I turn around and start reading my interview to a friend of mine behind me. At this point the entire class is silent as I'm whispering my interview to my friend, who finally points me to look at the professor who again says \"READ TO THE CLASS\". I turn around and finally understand what he wanted me to do, right as time runs out for class.", "summary": "Due to my lack of sleep I ignored what my professor told me to do while my Spanish class looked at me waiting for me to read out loud."}
{"id": "t3_1febav", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I(22F) show him(22M) that he has nothing to worry about?", "post": "Okay, so it's a little complicated. Here's some backstory:\n\nWe dated about two years ago, but things ended with a lot of hurt on both sides. It was a silly thing, a small argument that got out of hand because we were long distance and too young to know how to cope with that. I never really got over him, and a few months ago took the step of contacting him again. Since then, we've been talking and getting along very well. So here's the issue...\n\nI am still very much in love with him, and want nothing more than to be with him. He tells me he feels the same, but is unsure about taking it to the next level. We are still long distance (opposite ends of the UK), and I believe that he is scared that the same thing will happen again. I understand this, it was incredibly hard to handle, but we are different people now, more able to handle small disagreements like that. Yes, long distance is taxing, but if it's worth it...\n\nHe also seems to have very set ideas about what I will 'expect' from him. This is very frustrating for me, as these are his ideas and have no bearing on what I would actually need/want in a potential relationship. He seems to misread all my well intentioned conversation as me distrusting him, wanting to know where he is and what he's doing 24 7, when in reality I am simply enquiring about his day. I am merely interested in him, naturally so considering my feelings.\n\nIt is a very difficult situation for us both. But I love him dearly, and want nothing more than a chance to show him that. It causes me great pain that he cannot see this, and I am honestly terrified that he will throw this away rather than risk the hurt. I think it could be something beautiful.", "summary": "How do I show a wonderful man that he has nothing to fear from me, and get him to give me a chance to prove it?"}
{"id": "t3_3qdktu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] wanting relationship advice on being too emotionally invested in early relationship", "post": "I've (29) been chatting with a lady (31) I met online for the past month and we have been seeing each other for 2-3 weeks now.  She has clearly expressed interest in me and vice versa, but I am concerned that I am becoming too emotionally invested early on.  I believe there is good potential and she's expressed the same, so I would like to make sure it runs its own course without me negatively impacting it.\n\nEarly on, we would have long chats over text which I really enjoyed. Now, those are less existent which would lead me to think she's not as interested, but she still expresses interest in including me in her life and making time for me for us to go on dates even though her time is severely limited.\n\nIt leaves me feeling a bit peculiar because the dates are so great that the void in between dates is taxing at times. I enjoy/respect that she is independent, so I don't mind that she is leading her own life and slowly involving me. \n\nI suppose what I'm really asking for is perspective. I've never enjoyed when the person I was dating was clingy and I feel the roles are slightly reversing in this relationship. I do not want to appear as a clingy person. I'm not sure how to express interest and show I care without being too emotionally invested.\n\n   \nWhat do you guys think? Any stories or advice is greatly appreciated! I feel like I'm shooting myself in the foot here and I don't want to cripple myself in this relationship or future ones if this doesn't work out.", "summary": "I feel I might be too emotionally invested early on and want advice/perspective on how to prevent being clingy"}
{"id": "t3_dzw3g", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Reddit, How do I convince my best friend to stay in college?", "post": "We're both 19, and we've known each other for nearly 7 years at this point.  We both did well in high school, I'm doing fine in college, but he isn't.  He started as an engineer, then realized that that wasn't for him after nearly failing out of college #1 in two semesters.  \n\nOver the summer, he went to summer school and got accepted into a program at a local university (college #2) where he would become a full-time student after attending as a non-matriculated student for the fall semester.  I thought that everything was going to be all right with him; he seemed to do well, and from what I heard he was doing well at the beginning of the fall.\n\nHowever, I found out yesterday that he had decided to drop out and try his luck in a full-time job.  His reasoning behind this is that because he's failing 2 of his 4 classes; he tried an outside tutor who was a complete waste of time, and apparently there's a law that says a non-matriculated student cannot use the university's tutoring resources.  \n\nI can't find this law anywhere online, but even if it does actually exist, one of the classes he's failing is one whose equivalent here I happened to get an A in and I would be perfectly willing to tutor him.  I've tried talking to him and he just won't listen to reason.  He just wants to move in with his girlfriend when she moves close to him to go to school and become an apprentice sword-smith.  Sadly, yes, you read that last line correctly.\n\nThe county he lives in has one of the highest unemployment rates in the state overall, never mind for someone without a college degree; I get the sense he is throwing his life away and I desperately want to help him.  First, is it even possible to get the college to take him back?  From what I've heard, he only dropped out at the end of last week.  Second, how can I convince him to go back- and that I'm willing and able to help him with the classes he's having trouble with?", "summary": "Best friend of 7 years seems to be throwing his life away by giving up on college too early without having tried to get help from every possible source.  How do I convince him to go back to college?"}
{"id": "t3_otubs", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is my brother being irrational?", "post": "I need some advice about my brother and her girlfriend's relationship. Let's call his girlfriend \"B\". Basically, my brother can't spend a moment without her. If my mom wants to just hang out with him (eat lunch for example), he claims that if she wants to hang out with him, B has to be there, too. My father currently works overseas, and we see him twice a year, 1-2 weeks each. My mom and I are currently planning a vacation to Hawaii with my dad, and we asked our brother if he can go. He said no because B has summer school. We asked him why he can't go if B can't go. He said that because B isn't going, so he doesn't want to go. We tried to rationalize with him, saying that we don't get to spend time with my dad a lot, so why can't he just come with us for a week? He then started arguing with us saying that B is his family and that if we want him to hang out with my dad, why don't we not go on vacation and spend time at home instead. My brother called us selfish (which I really don't understand). My boyfriend can't go on vacation with us (not enough vacation days), and it didn't even cross my mind to bring him because it's supposed to be a family vacation. My brother said that he's normal, and I'm not. I mean, I hang out with my boyfriend whenever I get the chance, but I still have time allocated to just spending it with my family and my other friends. I really don't understand why he's being like this, and he's constantly getting into huge fights with my mom over this. So please help me out here, is he being completely irrational, or is it just me and my mom?", "summary": "My brother refuses to go on a family vacation because his gf has summer school and can't join us. Is he being irrational?"}
{"id": "t3_2xp7yp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [21/M] being unreasonable about being upset over my girlfriend's [24/F] partying habits?", "post": "So I've been dating this girl for about 6 months now, we're very happy together, see each other often only a few times a week because she has a very heavy school load. I wish I could spend more time with her but having been in College I understand the stress it can put on a person. So on weekends, every weekend, she goes over to this house and parties. A lot. Like an entire fifth of hard alcohol to herself, every weekend. That doesn't bother me so much, I drink a lot too. It's who she's doing it with, some of her past hookups, and the situation it puts me in. I've gone over there a few times with her to party, and the entire time was basically spent having all the males dissing me, insulting me or otherwise putting me down to the point where I had to leave (she stayed) . A few days ago I told her I'd like to go with her again sometime to see if it could be different but she said I wouldn't be welcomed back, at all. Like they wouldn't let me in the door. She's completely unsympathetic to my situation, ssaying she's just having her fun and I'm being too controlling by wanting her to not go there in the first place. \n\nAm I being unreasonable about being unhappy in this situation? IWhile it does bother me that she would like to hang out with people who won't allow me to even enter the house, I think it bothers me more how she doesn't/won't see my point of view at all.", "summary": "GF spends weekends partying at a house I'm not allowed in, it upsets me and she's completely unsympathetic to the situation and my feelings on the matter"}
{"id": "t3_2i9mx3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[17F] boyfriend[17M] of 2 years gets mad at games/people too often and I hate it", "post": "I used to play online games with my boyfriend, a MOBA ages ago. He got too mad at me/others and his shouting wasn't nice so I stopped playing with him and I told him why. He said he'd try not to shout again.\n\nRecently I've been playing Smite with him, he constantly gets angry/puts me down and rages at other people (calling them retards, swearing, asking if they have downs etc.) He has also been mean to me about it (though less often); he called me retarded and shouted at me asking why I won't listen to him on 2 occasions since we started playing again.\n\nIt's impossible to have fun playing with him. It's also embarrassing as we play with someone from school and he was there when my boyfriend got really mad at both me and the person from school... Then my other friend was concerned about me when he was told what my boyfriend was saying to me in the Skype call.\n\nI tell him he's being mean whenever he does say things to me or other people, but he still goes ahead and does it. A week ago we argued and then he blames it on being ill or stressed. Eventually he said sorry, but he has continued to be mean to other people and thinks I'm dumb when I tell him to stop. (They deserve it, apparently) He also has been shouting at me in frustration on Skype sometimes.\n\nI report him after each game for harassing other players, but his account hasn't been banned yet. He doesn't know that I report him when he's being like this.\n\nWhy does he do this to me and other people. How can I get him to stop?", "summary": "Boyfriend rages too much at me/others when playing games even though he knows I hate it, what can I do?***"}
{"id": "t3_39e35u", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Good news after interview. Now playing a strange waiting game. What to do?", "post": "This story has a timeline of two weeks, starting a week ago on Monday June 1st. I live in Australia, where it is now Thursday 11th. \n\nLast Monday, I got an interview for a non-advertised entry position at my dream company. All of the stars aligned: It was an emergency for them and I responded the fastest thanks to a friend of a friend that works at said company. \n\nAfter presenting them my portfolio, the three people I met with were very enthusiastic, to the point of showing me around the office and introducing me to people. I was told I'd be contacted the following day. \n\nOn Tuesday, I was informed they'd been able to resolve the issue internally but wanted to bring me on board anyway for another project. I was told we would speak very soon. \n\nOn Friday (of what was a long weekend), I was emailed after work hours told that an opportunity had come up for me to come on board and would be contacted on Tuesday. I replied thanking them and saying I hoped to hear from them on Tuesday. \n\nTuesday came and went with no phone call or no email. I let it pass because Tuesday was the starting day of the project I was initially being interviewed for (I imagined they were busy trying to make sure it started out right and hadn't had time to get in touch). \n\nWednesday passed and I wasn't contacted. \n\nIt is Thursday after lunch and I'm thinking of dropping the person who emailed me last just checking in. \n\nShould I email today or wait till tomorrow?", "summary": "I got an email saying the company had an opportunity to bring me on board on Friday last week saying I'd get an email/call on Tuesday. It's Thursday. Should I email today or wait until tomorrow?"}
{"id": "t3_10egu7", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Should I (20/f) add a guy (21/m) that I like on Facebook?", "post": "Hi everyone,\nI can't believe I'm even asking this question because it sounds so silly, but I really don't want to give off the wrong vibe to this guy, so I want to hear some opinions on the subject. There's this guy in one of my classes who seems pretty interesting, and we talk in class sometimes (not deep conversations, just small talk). I've known him for about 2 months now. From what I know of him (his interests, his personality), though, I'm attracted to him. I'd like to get to know him a little better, and I thought adding him on Facebook might be a casual way to do so. However, I'm afraid it will come off as desperate since we don't know each other outside of class. What do you guys think? Is it weird to randomly add a guy on Facebook, and will he see it as me being desperate? I know, I know, I'm over thinking this, but I'm curious as to what you all have to say.", "summary": "Like a guy from class, want to get to know him more, should I initiate contact with him by adding him on Facebook?"}
{"id": "t3_330ndi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Did I misread the signs? Pretty sure he (24/m) liked me (24/f)", "post": "So I do bar promotions and I was working one night when I ran into a friend of my ex-boyfriend. He asked me to hang out with him after my shift. We talked, we danced, we drank, and we kissed at the end of the night. Given he said \"it feels wrong,\" but he still kept his hands around me. We exchanged numbers. He texted me two weeks later and we got together with my (not mutual) friends. This time he kept his hands to himself. We talked a lot and the flow of the night felt good. We hung out and talked some more. We've been friends for over a month now. While I was with my ex-boyfriend, we never communicated. Pretty sure I only saw him once or twice. Today, I worked another promotion and he came to see me . He came alone, ordered a drink, and waited for my shift to be over. We took one of the bottles and laid around in the woods. I really like him by now. Im obsessed with when we're hanging out next. I brought up a talk about my feelings. He said I'm a really nice gal, but I'm also the ex-girlfriend of one of his really good friends and that he doesn't want to cause problems and if roles were revered, he wouldn't want his friend with his ex-girlfriend. Which is a totally fair response. I didn't know what to really say. So I just dropped the topic. Did I misread signs? He seemed into me. Or maybe I was too hopeful? Is all hope lost?\n\nBackground: ex-boyfriend and I have been together for 3.5 years. It was a good relationship, but not the best. He cheated on me 3 times. All about a year apart. Ofcourse his friend wouldn't know that. He even girlfriended the last side chick according to facebook. So I'm sure he wouldn't even care.", "summary": "ex-boyfriend's friend seemed really into me, but said he couldn't date me when I confronted him about my feelings."}
{"id": "t3_3ieh17", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my mother [50's F], I don't want to tell her I'm moving across the country.", "post": "I'm a recent graduate with a focus in media development. Something that's very hard to find where I am currently. I have always known that I would have to move to California eventually, in fact I've been excited for it. \n\nI moved back home with my mom and Step-dad while I looked for work, but nothing has really panned out the way I had hoped. The main reasons being that I lack hand-on experience in my field (which, like I said is hard to find here) and I'm far away from where the jobs are that I'm applying for, which makes it harder for them to hire me (according to recruiters). This makes my main issues location and experience, but since I haven't been able to find anything that can resolve my experience issue.. I need to resolve the location issue. \n\nOn to the main event: I informed my mom (about a week ago) that I was thinking about moving to LA using the money I have saved up and I should be able to get a job in retail (2.5 years experience in a nationwide company. I'm looking into contacting the location managers about openings). The first and immediate words out of her mouth were \"that's the stupidest idea I've ever heard.\"\n\nMy mom is very black-and-white. If she doesn't understand something she doesn't like it. In the past she has called my psychological research (which spanned 3 universities) childish and that she never thought I'd graduate my university and it was a mistake for me to go. \n\nOn the other side of things, the rest of my family (that I have told my plans to so far) all seem very supportive. \n\nI still live with my mom for the time being (I plan to move at the end of next month). So I don't want the last weeks before I leave to be a constant shit show about me making a big mistake or something, but I also don't want to be backing my car out with all my stuff and say \"btw I'm leaving to move across the country\". \n\nWhat do I do, oh wise Reddit?", "summary": "Mom often makes critical comments about my life. I don't want to tell her my plans to move far...far... faaaar away."}
{"id": "t3_2iz5ad", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to break up", "post": "So my gf (31) and I (26) have been together for 7 months now, and I'm having a hard time breaking up with her. \n\nShe is the sweetest, nicest person I know, so I really want to let her off easy and painlessly. I feel like you guys would know how to handle this. \n\nA little backstory: she's from my hometown, we met through mutual friends as there a lot of people from our hometown here. She's a bit older than me and has her shit together. She's got a steady job, while I'm still mostly unemployed. We have a lot of mutual friends. Eventually we became \"a thing,\" even though throughout the initial stages I knew I didn't want a girlfriend. (I'm still a little bummed about my x-gf cheating on me and sending me through a whirlwind of mistrust and depression). She was persistent though, saying she wouldn't hurt me. Anyways, fast forward to now: we've been dating for 7 months, I'm a lot less physically attracted to her than I was (she's not my ideal body type), our conversations are pretty basic (she's really into fashion, nail polish, and gossip/celebrities and I'm not--everything else we talk about is me introducing her to things and teaching her things), it also bothers me that she craves attention (always posting things online, always texting random people, always making loud statements that glorify/exaggerate her sexuality in front of others) and our work schedules are so different (she works intensely 4 days a week, I work less hours but more like 7 days a week). \n\nWhen I think of the positives of our relationship it makes me feel like an asshole: she's very financially stable and pays for a lot of things for me. I guess I've become the gold digger I've  always resented. But honestly in these hard times a little financial stability is really comforting. Another great thing about her is how responsible she is and how she helps me take care of my shit. \n\nHalp! I don't know what to do. I want us to be friends/friendly. I just don't see a point in being in a committed relationship right now.", "summary": "don't know how to break up with my sweet, motherly, financially stable, yet obnoxiously slutty, and basic/simpleton girlfriend"}
{"id": "t3_19oggv", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Finally asked my crush out on a date! She said she's busy but would like to have it another day.", "post": "So I have been crushing on a really smart and pretty girl for the past month and wanted to ask her out on a date tomorrow morning before school starts. I treid to ask her at lunch but I chickened out. I kept on saying to myself that I'll regret chickening on this opportunity. So right when I said bye to my friend talking about how I wasn't able to ask my crush coincidentally popped up and I had a convo with her about how her day went. Things were going pretty well and I surprised myself by how I kept eye contact and kept the conversation going.\n\nThis was my chance. So I asked her if she's free tomorrow morning. She said \"no, I have to study for a psych test. Wait, what do you mean?\" Then I told her that I was thinking of having coffee that day. My crush smiled and said \"I may not do it tomorrow but I can some other day.\" We kept eye contact and she smiled too when we talked. I don't think I ever had the guts to ask someone out before in my life. \n\nIt's not a no so I'm happy about that. And I managed to muster up enough courage to ask someone out. xD", "summary": "Crush I've been planning to ask out on a simple coffee date said she couldn't make it to the original date but said she'd like to have it another time when she's less busy."}
{"id": "t3_1a1uig", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the worst thing that's happened between you and your boss that made you think you would be fired, but ended up okay?", "post": "So I work in a restaurant and today while quartering chickens my boss, operating manager and restaurant owner tried to show me a better way to cut, I slipped, cut his index finger near clean off, and ended up sending him to the hospital for seven stitches... Pretty much thought I'd be getting fired after he stopped cussing, but instead he told me to make sure everything got done and to watch 'the yahoos' (my fellow workers), before driving himself to the hospital.\n\nIf this wasn't enough he came back to work to finish out the day several hours later (and probably to make sure we all hadn't burned the place in his absence.) He isn't the type to congratulate anyone, but he told me I did a great job, even though I pretty much knifed him.\n\nNo photo evidence yet, was pretty freaked by the whole situation as it happened, and when my boss returned he had gauze, double vinyl gloves and then taped it like he was working with Ebola. \n\nSo that's my story of thinking I'd no longer have a job, what's the worst that you've done to your boss reddit?", "summary": "nearly cut my boss' index finger off at work, instead of getting fired I was put in charge, then congratulated on a job well done."}
{"id": "t3_3gpwvf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My f/23, boyfriend, m/23, of 2 years constantly ignores my feelings and suggestions on improving our relationship and I don't feel like a priority", "post": "I'm kind of at a loss on what to do about this. I love my boyfriend, a lot and I want him in life. But lately I've been feeling so disappointed.\n\nI'd say the main issue is I've asked him time and time again to do things with me.  And not boring things that only I would like, but stuff like going to a baseball game. He agrees or I guess brushes me off and we never do anything.  All I want is to get out and off the couch on occasion, but he seems content with always doing that.  I couldn't tell you how many times I've talked to him about doing things together.\n\nI guess what really has me pissed at the moment is that he spent all day yesterday helping his new female roommate move in.  I'm not threatened by her and I know nothing would ever happen. What I am mad about though is he hasn't done anything like that for me in a long time.  I moved a couple months ago and he didn't lift a finger or offer to help.  This situation just leads me to thing about other things like how he'll go on trips with his friends but not me even though I always talk about wanting to go certain places and suggest we plan it out.  He'll go out with his friends, but never with me.  \n\nIt just sucks to not feel like a priority after 2 years.  I want to talk to him one last time about it and see if there's any hope at me feeling better.  Any advice on how to get through to him and not cause a major fight?", "summary": "bf ignores requests to get out and be more social/active.  He does stuff with other people and I seem to get the short end of the stick"}
{"id": "t3_43yq3g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex?-girlfiend [35F] physically assaulted me [28M] during an argument for the first time, why do I feel guilty?", "post": "My partner woke me up this morning after I muttered a patients name during my sleep (I work as a medical dispatcher) she assumed I was cheating on her and demanded to check my phone, I complied since I had nothing to hide.\n\nShe found a video of me at the clubs last year which I did not tell her, it was a video of just the club and I was with my boys with no girls present.\n\nI refused to speak about this since I was not in the right mind set to talk about this since I was still half asleep, I went into the lounge and tried to ignore the situation until later on.\n\nShe did not agree to this and tried to wake me up and confront me about this, I was upset and I did tell her to \"f*ck off, I'll speak to you when I'm awake\". She demanded to to talk about this and grabbed me by the wrists, I still refused to talk about it as I was furious and did not want to make the situation worse.\n\nShe then got extremely upset and decided to punch me in the arm and slap me in the face numerous of times, I pleaded her to stop and told her it was not the right thing to do, I threaten to call the police and she kept going for 30 mins I called the cops to come and I did not lay a single finger on her.\n\nThe took her away and advised she was not to come back until tomorrow and I refused to press an charges.\n\nShe is an international student from Japan and English isn't her first language, I'm born in Australia so my English is fluent. We have been dating for 1 year, I understand there is some communication problems at times but we enjoy each others company and have not had major arguments in the past.\n\nWe just moved out together 1 month into an apartment and invested a lot of time and money into it.\n\nDo I try and make it work?\nShould I leave?\nWhy do I feel like I was responsible and guilty?", "summary": "moved into apartment with partner after 1 year of dating for 1 month and she assaulted me for the first time after an argument because I refused to communicate, where do I go from here?"}
{"id": "t3_ost5l", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Want to start a strength training routine--help me out?", "post": "Some background: I'm 22, f, 5'4\" and currently around 253 lbs. Over the last 3 weeks I've cut out soda and sweet tea completely, started eating more fresh fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and less white bread, reduced my calorie intake (down to 1390) started doing cardio at the gym (3 mph on the treadmill at an incline of 1, for about an hour, every day). Thanks to this, I've lost 15 lbs from my starting weight of 268.\n\nNow, I'd like to start strength training so that I'm not only losing fat but maintaining/building muscle so that when I finally do lose all this weight I won't just be a nasty, wrinkly mass of skin. I plan on strength training 3 times a week. \n\nWhile at the gym earlier today (last night?), I wrote a list of weight machines I should use and I just wanted to get peoples' opinions on my routine and if there are any other machines I should use or any muscle groups I neglected in selecting the machines. \n\nBEFORE anyone says I shouldn't use weight machines, I'd just like to say I'd prefer them because I'm uncomfortable using free weights and that's just that. When I'm more confident in my ability to keep form while lifting, I'll go to free weights, until then, I'd like to know that I'm not going to drop anything on myself or peel my muscles from my bones (I'm quite attached to them, you know!) because I didn't do something right.\n\nAnyways, here's my list of machines:\nLeg press\nHip abduction/adduction\nLower back (that's all the machine said)\nCompound row\nVertical chest press\nPullover\nOverhead", "summary": "I think I should use the above machines to target all of my muscle groups. Please let me know if I left something out and what MACHINE, if any, I can use to target that muscle/group. "}
{"id": "t3_1h8ycu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (25/m) don't know when to contact her (24/f) when we met two nights ago.", "post": "Met her Wednesday night. Got her number, already talked about where/when we can meet up (she's out of town for a month, about 1.5 hours away, so we can meet up in the middle). During the conversation I asked when she would be free, she said next week, and then we split. I texted her something silly right after so she had my number, she responded with \" :) :P \" (why, I don't know? I hate smilies). \n\nSo it's now Friday, and I feel like if I wait until SUNDAY to talk to her that'll be awhile and attraction will be lost. Should I send a smell text now?", "summary": "Going to call girl Sunday night for a date, met her this previous Wed. Don't know if I should text her today to keep flow of attraction."}
{"id": "t3_kr8n6", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Reddit, my cat has been eating practically nothing for a few weeks now. What should I do?", "post": "I rescued her about a month ago, and my housemate and I think that she didn't come from a very good home. However, she opened up almost right away, and became a much friendlier cat. The first day she was here we gave her a can of wet food and she tore through it. The problem started when we tried to give her dry food, and she wouldn't touch it. Then when we finally admitted defeat and resolved to buy wet food, she wouldn't eat that either. She only licks the gravy off of the meat and then leaves it. She barely even eats tuna if we give it to her. The bizarre thing is, she's not really losing weight. I took her to a vet, who explained that she's probably just feeling anxious about being in a new place, and she'll start eating eventually.", "summary": "I'm starting to get worried- she hasn't pooped in a week, and she just really won't touch her food beyond licking the gravy off. Has anyone gone through this/does anyone have any advice or explanations?***"}
{"id": "t3_ovrqd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Dating a girl, had the sex talk. She tells me she has had HPV with warts over 7 years ago and it's cleared up.  Is this a deal breaker?", "post": "My girlfriend (25) and I (28M) had the sex talk to lay everything on the table before having sex.  She mentioned she wants me to get tested, and she will as well before doing the deed.  She mentioned that she has had HPV 7 years ago and she has had genital warts.  They are gone now and she mentioned that her doctor said that after 2 years she should be clean.\n\nThis blew me away, but after doing some research, HPV seems common.  But I'm really worried, as I'm clean and I'm fairly careful about sex in a relationship.  Am I overreacting?  I'm kind of freaked out right now and I'm at a crossroads, I really like this girl, but the thought of getting an STD seems like its not worth the risk.   \n\nWhat would you do in this situation?  A part of me is saying that I should run?  Though I may already have something because I have touched her with my fingers and I didn't wash my hands (HPV is very contagious).", "summary": "New girlfriend had the sex talk, revealed she has HPV (an STD). I'd like to see where this relationship goes but a part of me is worried about this issue and that it might be better to run."}
{"id": "t3_ugxjb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What was the last dream you had?", "post": "Not the coolest or the scariest, your most previous one you remember. \n\nHere's mine from two nights ago: \n\nI was in my room and I woke up around 12ish, it was my birthday. There were no indications of it--no balloons or decorations--Dream Me just knew. I looked out the window and it wasn't my street. I was in my room but the neighborhood was not mine. Also, I think my Asian friend was walking down the sidewalk (Dream Me deduced that bitch was leaving my birthday party early). \nAnyway, I pulled on one of my teeth and half of it came off. It was disintegrating like a cement putty almost. Then once I thought I had pulled out all of them, I got really excited because I could finally rub my gums together like a baby or an old person. In addition, I remember being really excited because having no teeth meant I could eat pudding for the rest of my life. But then I realized my bottom teeth were still there and my top teeth still had the cement-like upper half. \nThat's all I remember; holding the remnants of my chalky teeth wondering if I could still eat pudding forever even though I still had 75% of my teeth. \n\nAnyway, I thought this was real life because I couldn't find toothpaste the night before and hadn't brushed my teeth.", "summary": "For my birthday I thought I pulled out all of my teeth, but in the end still had some so that meant no pudding."}
{"id": "t3_2d5erk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend of 2+ years[20 F] and I [20 M] are no longer on the same page sexually", "post": "As the title says, my girlfriend and I have run into some issues over the past few months.  When we first started dating we had sex nearly every day, but that has dropped precipitously, to MAYBE twice a month now.  Part of this is due to circumstance (we both held time-intensive internships this summer), but part is simply due to her lack of sex drive.  It has gotten to the point where she almost never makes any sexual advances, and seems to have sex only to appease me.  Obviously, this is not a sustainable thing for me.\n\nThis a complicated, sensitive topic for her (and me) though, as she was sexually assaulted a few years ago (before we started dating), so I am hesitant to bring this up to her.  We have had a couple of conversations and she assures me that she is still very much attracted to me, and loves me, but that her body just can't have sex, and she is still affected by what happened to her.  She also added that at the beginning of the relationship she didn't want to say anything, but that the amount of sex we were having \"was just too much for her to handle\".  I do believe she is still attracted to me and loves me, and everything else about our relationship is great, but I can't help feeling like we've simply turned into best friends who occasionally have sex, as opposed to romantic partners.\n\nThe question here is: how do I handle this?  I feel as though speaking to a psychologist might help her a bit.  It's clear that she's still affected by what happened to her.  I just want to go about it in the most gentle, sensitive way possible, without offending her or forcing her to re-visit things she doesn't want to.  I am committed to the relationship and I want to help us, but sex is a part of that, and I feel like this is something which needs to be addressed, for her sake and mine.", "summary": "Rarely have sex, having hard time bringing this up, as it is a sensitive topic for her due to a past sexual assault..."}
{"id": "t3_2gxnmz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is There A Way I [23m] Can Get My Ex [20f] Back?", "post": "Long story medium-sized: My GF of just under a year and I split three months ago. We hadn't talked since our final argument until I recently suffered a tragedy. She texted me sympathy and that started us talking again and forgiving each other for what happened between us.\n\nNow we're back to being the friends we were before we started dating: daily texting and joking. We haven't seen each other in person yet due to our schedules but I would like to arrange it sometime soon. I clearly still have feelings for her but I think she might think of it in a \"just hasn't gotten over me\" sense, like I'm uninterested in a relationship. I do want her back.\n\nShe hasn't really indicated she still has romantic feelings or is interested in getting back and I don't know how she feels about me, I just know she said she missed me a lot and wanted to text me every night but couldn't while we were apart. Of course that could just be because we've always been close friends.\n\nWhen we were together things were pretty intense: telling each other \"I Love You\" and physical stuff. I can't convince myself that she doesn't still have feelings.\n\nIs there any way to get her back? Can I at least tell if she has feelings for me so I can decide which way I should turn?", "summary": "How can I tell if the ex I've become friends with again still has romantic feelings and how can I convince her to try dating me again?"}
{"id": "t3_2115tb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [20F] not sure what to do about him [24M]... [3 Years].", "post": "Where do I begin.. I have been beyond unhappy (in general) lately. This isn't the first time I've felt like this, but it doesn't normally \"last\" this long. So I'm going through stuff..\n\nWe both have feelings for each other, we aren't in a relationship, and we watch TV every night together. I haven't been myself, and I know I'm extremely irritable and pretty much a ticking time bomb, so I tell him I'm sick (I was too, but it was more about my emotions), and we'll watch again in a few days. He keeps checking up on me.. Every day. I tell him I'm fine, but I really just want to be left alone and he won't. We fight (I absolutely started it, but I was trying to stay away). He apologized, but I still haven't talked to him in over a week, but I'm still the exact same so I feel like I still need to be by myself.. And I just can't say what I mean or how I feel. But how long will this feeling last? Forever?\n\nA small part of me never wants to speak to him again, but the rest of me wants to go back to the way things were. Being alone isn't going to make me any happier, but I'm not happy anyway, so.. \n\nI am not a caring/affectionate person in general. I don't even say 'I love you' or hug my mother, and there's nobody I care about more. Do I care about him? It's been 3 years, absolutely, but nothing makes me happy these days - I'm not even sure if I enjoy watching TV with him anymore, but I'm not sure if that's a temporary feeling, and I'm just hurting about everything. But then I feel like I will regret it in the future. We get along great for the most part, but I'm still on the fence. :(\n\nSorry if this a mess. Advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks.", "summary": "I haven't been happy lately, took some time away from him but still fight, and I'm not sure what I should do.."}
{"id": "t3_1or0cd", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I have a chance to fix something I hate about myself, now I'm scared to do it.", "post": "When I was 13, I broke my nose in a major way. We're talking a 90 degree angle. I didn't ever really get it fixed properly... A few days later, a family friend (who was a surgeon) kinda snapped it back into place. My nose was always larger than normal, but now it's pretty crooked and there's a substantial bump. I hate the way it looks. I think people won't think I'm attractive or won't want to talk to me if they initially view me from my \"bad side\". I know it's totally crazy and may be all in my head, but it's a problem that's plagued me for years. The worst part of it is that I have breathing problems. Now, I'm 21 and I met with a surgeon for the first time. He said that by fixing my septum (septoplasty), my breathing problems would be solved. Fixing my nose cosmetically is a totally different procedure (rhinoplasty). I know for sure that I want to fix my breathing, but here's the catch... if I fix my septum, I won't be able to go back later and do the rhinoplasty. Apparently it works the best if it's all done at once... doing any further cosmetic surgery can make it look weird. Costs aside, I have the chance to fix something that's bothered me for years, and now I'm afraid of the consequences. What if I hate the way I look afterwards? I have a feeling that if I pass up the chance, I'll totally regret it. I've come to terms with the fact that I've got a honker for a nose. It gives my face character and I kind of like that. In my mind, getting plastic surgery would be like giving up on myself. But the thought of looking in the mirror each day and not being bothered by it makes me want to get a rhinoplasty. Reddit, I need your help! I understand this may make me seem vapid for wanting something like this, so whatever.", "summary": "I've wanted a nose job all my life, and now the chance is presenting itself and I'm pussying out."}
{"id": "t3_1c6133", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Professionals of Reddit, is it completely inappropriate to send a \"thank you\"/bashing email to my interviewers?", "post": "Hear me out. I had a two hours interview the other day, with three different people. They're all smart professionals, and I highly respect them for their profession. First one to interview me had absolutely no people skills. She may be smart, but definitely should not be dealing with another human being, she practically just read my resume to me. The second guy was very personable, no complaints about him. Final guy was the CEO, and he's an asshole. I really respected that he's a straight forward guy, BUT it's absolutely unnecessary to put down another human being just because you think you're better than them. I know he's smarter, richer, and cut throat, but you know what, we're all humans, if you treat me like that when I'm just interviewing, how will you treat me when I'm your employee? They're waiting for me to email them.", "summary": "Interviewed for a job, and they have no interviewing skills. Should I email a thank you/honest criticism or would that sound bitter?"}
{"id": "t3_xdngp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey reddit, tell me your stories of being unfairly disciplined. I'll start:", "post": "I used to go camping with my family every summer in S. Ontario in a small campground where most people knew each other, year after year. As the people of my age group grew older we began camping on our own, in separate parts of the campground from our parents (this would typically be from 19 years old and onward). So naturally, as any people of that age do, we drank (legal age in Canada is 19) and smoked weed and held awesome parties way on the other side of the campground to avoid annoying the other campers. Now my last year of camping at this lake we had a nice party one night lots of people some familiar faces, some new. The next day the administrator of the campground informs my site mates and I that we are banned from the campground for 5 years for giving alcohol to minors. What really happened is irresponsible parents lost track of where their kids were, and also track of where their booze were (the 15 and 16 year olds, who were not invited, obviously stole their parents alcohol). I know I didn't give any alcohol to any of the young people, and I'm sure my friends wouldn't have (we worked our asses off at near minimum wage that summer just to save up enough to go camping, we had no extra drinks.) We appealed the decision, but in a closed door meeting, the board of directors upheld the decision. sigh, it was a good time while it lasted.", "summary": "I held a party in a campground for friends who were of age, and  unbeknownst to us, some 15, and 16 year olds showed up and got drunk, I got blamed for it not their parents."}
{"id": "t3_3avaph", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Get a dog now or wait?", "post": "I just graduated college in May and already am working full time (including some benefits). In August I plan to leave my current apartment for a house/duplex in a less busy part of town which would also allow me to have room for a dog. I grew up with dogs (so I'm very familiar with all the work that goes into caring for one), and spending the last four years without one has gotten harder and harder. I'm to the point now where seeing another person's dog (or even cat) makes my stomach drop and just makes me kinda sad. However, there is a chance that I will be moving next year as well, depending on my gf's decision on grad schools.  Additionally I'm also looking at paying off student loans, and occasionally work a second job a couple nights a week (which does offset the financial burden of loans a good bit) though I would definitely make sure to only have one job for the first couple months of having the new dog.\n\nI know it's not a perfect time to get a dog, but I don't think there ever is - and I hate the idea of waiting another year or more. Plus I'm not planning on getting & dealing with a puppy, rather adopting 3-7 year old.\n\nI'm just looking for opinions. Is it a bad or okay idea?", "summary": "College grad. Want dog badly after moving, but may move again within a year. Have full time job (plus some) and student loans. Good or bad idea?"}
{"id": "t3_54n5nz", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Missing memories and learnt material over the course of the last few years.", "post": "I suffer from depression and anxiety. I have lost my motivation and my ability to concentrate. What's frustrating me the most is that I can remember very little (practically none) of the material I've learned over the past few years (in addition to not being able to remember my life outside of school).\n\nI was struggling so much with these metal issues on top of a physical illness (which has now been resolved) that I took two \"incompletes\" last semester (meaning that the professors have allowed me to finish the course after the end date) and have delayed my return to university until next year. \n\nBasically, is there anyway to get those memories back? Every time I look at the material I just feel like a failure because I do not understand it. What good is a degree if you don't learn anything? I just don't know what to do with myself.", "summary": "I can't remember anything and believe it's tied to my depression. Don't know how to move forward with my education or finish classes I was generously granted extra time to complete."}
{"id": "t3_33byen", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 F] can't handle my two friends [18 M and 17 F] that are exes to each other bickering constantly in a group chat.", "post": "So I have a group chat with about 8 of my Internet friends and my boyfriend. Except for my boyfriend, everyone else is scattered around the world and my country. Two of these friends were in a long distance relationship for 3 months until recently (the boy broke it off because of distance). \n\nEver since this happened, they are both relatively friendly until one or the other brings up someone they're interested in. They're constantly arguing and making sly, passive aggressive remarks at each other. Honestly, it's making talking to them both at the same time rather unpleasant.\n\nI do like both of these people, I just want to be able to talk to them without some stupid fight breaking out. I personally think one should leave or both should leave, but they're both wanted by others in the chat. \n\nPlease help Reddit, this situation is like walking around a room full of gas holding a match.", "summary": "Two people in my friendship group are exes and constantly bicker in our group chat and I can't stand it any more."}
{"id": "t3_3hmmfs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend [25F] has doubts after 6 years, I'm [25M].. Advice appreciated", "post": "I'm really struggling with this, I would like some fresh looks on the situation.\n\nWe have been together for almost 6 years now, and after moving in together last july I had the impression all was going great. We both expressed on plenty occasions how much we both loved it and eachother. Recently (to me: out of the blue) my girlfriend expressed some doubts and thoughts she had about us and herself.\n\nWe have been together since leaving high school, and she is wondering if anything better is out there. She still loves me and is still attracted to me. But still, she is left with a 'Is this it then?' feeling. As part of her education, management and marketeering, she travelled quite a bit and met ambitious peope. My education and future on the other hand, being a teacher, aren't ambitious in the same way.\n\nShe acknowledges she loves me and she doesn't know if anything better will ever come along. She also knows living with another ambitious person needs a sacrifice from future potential family or social matters. She wants to live a faster life, but it seems she's trying to find a balance between this (work/travel/fast living/...) and what we have now (slower/cozy couch time/social laidback events/travel /...).\n\nI'm uncertain about my position in all this. I've tried to make her realise why we're together in the first place by doing lots of fun stuff. I'm constantly trying to get a read on our 'status'.. Usually I'm pretty confident, but now even if a kiss isn't 100% I start doubting and I become uncertain..", "summary": "Girlfriend is in doubt if she wants to share her future with me. Not sure how to change her mind or how to act."}
{"id": "t3_2yk9w4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO (22F) of almost 5 years cheated on me (21M). Where do I go from here?", "post": "Hi /r/relationships. I've never posted here before or even read this subreddit because I've never had *real* relationship problems before this.\n\nMy post's title says the most important part. I've been with the same woman since high school, and now I'm about to graduate college. I thought everything was perfectly fine until recently. Small signs added up until I began to snoop. I found graphic, explicit text messages that made it clear that she had a sexual relationship with someone almost a year ago. I've confronted her and she's extremely remorseful. However, my pride and self-respect won't let me continue a relationship with her, no matter how much I love her.\n\nSo what do I do now? I want to take some time to be single, but I haven't been alone in years. I'm not sure what it's like. And while it's definitely not my top priority, I'm a bit scared of entering the dating scene again. Meeting people and finding a partner isn't like it was in highschool (the last time this was even a thing for me). Frankly, it's all pretty intimidating. \n\nOverall, I'm holding up well. I have supportive family and friends. I'm still going to finish school just fine, and I have a great job lined up for after graduation. It's in a whole different state, so in a few months I'll basically have a brand new life. This may be a blessing or terribly lonely. \n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Broke up with girlfriend after being cheated on. I haven't been single since highschool. How do I be a single 21-year-old guy? Is it as scary as it looks?"}
{"id": "t3_3pnekt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] interested in a girl [23F] but I'm trying now to be a rebound", "post": "So I've been friends with a girl for several months now. At the time we met, she was dating and living with a guy I considered a friend for a while. She told me they were having issues and could end up stuck here (she's from out of the state). I told her that if that ever happened she could stay with me until she figured out what to do. Fast forward a few months and she finds out he was cheating on her, so she packed up and has been staying with me for a few weeks now. Her original intention was to go home but she decided to keep working at her job and live with me a while longer.\n\nWe grew close and developed a physical and somewhat of an emotional relationship. Things were fine, and she's been sleeping next to me every night. So the other day, things were fine, but her ex wanted her to come over and talk, so she did. When she got home, she came home late, and was very distant. She promised they didn't have sex or anything. She started to apologize saying she's a burden to everyone and she's tired of ruining everyone's life. She wouldn't tell me what she talked to him about, just that he seemed like a different person and she feels he is up to something. Since then she won't lay next to me, or hold my hand or anything. She said it's just a \"mood\" and she has them quite often. \n\nI know most people would say, \"Get out now, don't be a rebound\". But I still feel like there's the potential for more. I'm not sure if I should back off some and let her heal, or back off because she's trying to work things out with him. I want to avoid being a rebound, but I also feel like if I distance myself, she'll get lonely and start to see him more. I'm sure he's going to ask to see her again, and I don't know if I should try and stop her or tell her to go. Any advice is appreciated.", "summary": "Girl I like is living with me. She acts like she likes me but still seems hung up on her cheating ex and went to see him. She's been distant towards me since then. How should I act?"}
{"id": "t3_38po4x", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by bonding with mommy", "post": "couple of facts about me:\n\n1.my mom and I don't have the best relationship, and I want to change that\n\n2.my moms always wanted to get a Thai massage, so I said \"what the hell, my treat\"\n\n3.I'm a bit of a horn dog (relevant username)\n\n4.I, like most people, don't think straight when I first wake up\n\n5.I laugh when I'm nervous\n\n___\nToday, I took my mom to get that Thai massage. The thing is, I'm a very stressed man and when she asked me to join her, I thought \"what the hell\" and decided to get a massage of my own, too. I could use a little R&R. My masseuse was this cute Asian lady, who was a gift from the gods at masseusing. Fast forward 20 minutes, I'm out cold\n\nAnyone know that Russel Peters act where he talks about that Thai massage he had? If not, here's the jist: In Thailand, after a massage they \"[finish you off] For whatever reason even before realizing I would be getting a Thai massage today, I was thinking about that act. \n\nI wake up with the Asian rubbing down my inner thighs, and I realize, with every rub she's getting closer to *there*. Obviously she doesn't plan on touching it, but my boner is now about 6 inches farther to my right than she thinks, as my thing was lined in my boxers. Just waking up and all, and being a fucking idiot, I do nothing. I truly think I'm white Russel Peters right now. Well, when in ~~Rome~~ Thailand...\n\n**EEEKK** She got a big handful of something she didn't expect to grab, freaked out and started yelling in **insert language here*. I, now fully awake, start laughing hysterically, 3 feet from my mother, who is now awake and sees this unfold. The manager comes over because I'm a fucking pervert in his eyes and kicks us out on the spot. It's been like 3 hours and I still haven't talked to my mom. Reddit, TIFU", "summary": "Got a massage, fell asleep, woke up with a boner and got kicked out of the place with my mom because sexual assault."}
{"id": "t3_3am6q7", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Fighting open container ticket I received as a passenger in court", "post": "Hey guys. This happened in Illinois. I was at a party last night and got a ride home when we were pulled over. I was a passenger in the back seat, there was another passenger in the seat in front of me. The cop (who initially pulled his gun because of an airsoft gun in the car) searched the car and found some open beer bottles, and I received an 11-502B Illegal Transportation of Alcohol ticket, along with the other passenger. Curiously the driver did not receive a ticket of any kind. I did not have any knowledge of the open containers and was just trying to get a ride home, something I communicated to the officer. What are my odds trying to fight this in court? Thanks in advance.", "summary": "got aan open container ticket in Illinois as a passenger who didn't have any knowledge of the containers, can I fight this in court?"}
{"id": "t3_4weurm", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "An unusual case", "post": "Heyo!\n So I've run into a couple of issues while looking to start my journey into weight loss and getting my weight back on track. But first a bit about myself, as that'll come into play soon, I am a 15 year old Male who is about 5'6 and close to 195 lbs. Fed up with myself I began to search the Internet for help. I've been lurking for a bit but I realized that a lot of what is in this sub can't exactly fit me due to my age. For example, although I really want to try My Fitness Pal I cannot create an account without a date of birth for an 18 year old(or older). I thought about this and decided that may throw off my diet so I decided not to do it. Alas I come to you humbly for any help/advice/apps/diets you may be able to recommend to me. Unfortunately I don't know much about diets/calories and what amount of calories I should be I taking or what to eat etc. So I'd appreciate it if some of you may tell me of any apps you guys know and/or specific food and recipes that I can get started on to loose weight. I may be young but I'm not incompetent! So a lot of recipes I myself will be able to cook, and try, that way I can hopefully get my siblings/mother in on the healthy food as we are all in the same boat.", "summary": "Youngster cannot receive full benefits of apps like My Fitness Pal and thus seeks aid from all who can help him personally."}
{"id": "t3_2ezpyw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] really like [19 F], we click on every level, but shes admitted she's really \"screwed from a previous relationship.\" I want to help her.", "post": "So we've been talking/seeing each other for a few weeks now, we click on everything - music, movies, TV shows, opinions etc etc.\n\nShe has admitted to me that she's damaged from a previous relationship where the guy messed her up and its screwed how she deals with people. That she's very \"stand offish\" and that she's not good with people.\n\nShe's like me in so many aspects except that I'm very passive and don't get angered easily, whereas she can get very in your face (figuratively) and offended.\n\nI really really do like her a lot and I know she thinks of me this way and she's willing to take things further then just talking, but I have to know how can I go about helping her heal from that previous relationship? I want to be there for her, I want to be able to talk to her about it and maybe change her personality to that of less of a pessimist and more of an open person (especially with me.)\nI want to know how to make her know that she's not unwanted, that she's awesome person and that people in general aren't horrible. That I'm here for her.\n\nJust to complicate things as well, the guy who did this to her in the first place messaged her last night asking her how she is. She hasn't talked to me much about what it is he did to her only that it \"fucked her up\" and has caused her to be how she is now. I think she's a little stressed about him talking to her though as she's been very aggressive towards me today which is hard for me.", "summary": "She's says she's damaged from a previous relationship but I care enough/like her enough to want to try and help her as best as I can."}
{"id": "t3_3d7wfo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my friend [23 M] of about a year, getting my signals mixed...", "post": "So, for a little while now, I've had some pretty serious feelings developing for a friend of mine. When I met him, I was in a serious relationship, but that has since ended. Over the last year or so, we've become slightly closer, and I really thought I was getting signals from him that he might also be interested.\n\nWell, I screwed up and started seeing a different guy a little while after my break up from the serious relationship, even though I was more strongly interested in my friend. My fear of the uncertainty drove me to go with the \"safe bet\" instead of taking a risk on my friend.\n\nAs for the signals I thought I saw, he and I texted quite a bit and shared some favorite music. We shared our interests with each other, and he even remembered something I liked and bought me a gift related to it. We spent more time alone than before, and had a lot of fun.\n\nNow he is seeing someone, and I didn't see it until after I broke things off with the guy I was seeing most recently. Should I just wait it out? Was I wrong in assuming that he might feel the same? Is it possible that he's just taking the \"safe bet\" now too? Should I approach him with my feelings? I don't want to step on anyone's toes, I just want to be happy.", "summary": "I have feelings for a friend and was getting mixed signals from him. I broke up with my boyfriend but now my friend is dating someone. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3uv6pk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my girlfriend [20 F] of roughly two weeks, but I'm afraid she already lost interest. **tl;dr**: I'm inexperienced, what on earth should I do?", "post": "I've met a girl a few months ago at a concert and we started meeting more frequently. We had an amazing time at a live show around two weeks ago that ended in us kissing and generally being very fond of each other.\n\nOur interests are very similar and we enjoyed each other's company, but the last time we've met I felt like she was a bit more distant. She had her friends there, so I thought she maybe didn't want them to know.\n\nIn the end we still parted with a kiss, but I'm not sure that it had the same weight from here perspective. I'm hoping to go out with here sometime but she has tons of schoolwork and I don't know how to figure this out. When we are texting she doesn't seem much different.\n\nWhat should I do? Is this normal? I know nothing about relationships", "summary": "I have been seing a girl for a few weeks but she suddenly acted a bit more distant and I don't know what it means, I have little experience with relationships"}
{"id": "t3_2tzck0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by using humans as an example to express the idea of different variants in a species.", "post": "This just happened in my pathogenic microbiology class. \n\nSo I'm sitting there waiting for class to start and I'm making my witty comments with my friends enjoying the pre-class aura and nerding out about vaccinations and how idiotic some people in the anti-vaccine movement is. Class starts. \n\nI am on top of my game. Answering questions right and left. One after the other. The professor is impressed about the depth in which I read one of our scientifically significant articles. So we started talking about pathogenicity and how you can be in the same species but be a different variant. Basically you can have two of the same bacteria's with different factors that cause one to result in a different \"strength\" of disease progression or resistant factors. (An example is VRSA and MRSA). \n\nSo my professor asks \"who can give me an example of what a variant is and explain what they're saying\".... I raise my hand and say \"WE are all HUMAN, but an example of variant in our species would be Asian decent, African decent, European decent and South American decent\". \n\nThere was a pause with a long stare and my professor says \"that is correct but probably one of the most controversial ways of explaining it\". Everyone starts laughing except a few people who shot me looks. Now I look semi-racist for using humans as a way of expressing variants in a species. I completely feel like shit as I realized how bad it came out in class.", "summary": "I got too cocky answering questions in class and used humans as a way of explaining why we are truly different via decent and probably racially offended kids in class. "}
{"id": "t3_2z8bjf", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "'What makes you stand out from the crowd for this job?' - Presentation help", "post": "I'm 19F in England and I've been offered a job interview for the position of bar staff at my student's union (I know this isn't a serious job by any means, but I could really really do with getting it!).\n\nAs part of my interview I need to do a 3 minute presentation on what makes me stand out for this job. I'm doing okay for topics - reliability, lots of work experience, giving back to the community etc. but could always do with extra if you can think of any.\n\nMy main question is, what is the best way to open this presentation? Also any tips for presenting in general would be welcome as I haven't had to do many in the past.", "summary": "Best way to open a presentation that answers the question 'What makes you stand out from the crowd for this job?' Thank you in advance."}
{"id": "t3_2xraye", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "[Discussion] Getting kicked down seems like the only way to get back on track....", "post": "I apologize if this isn't the right subreddit to be posting in, or if I have used the wrong tag. I just really would like to get out of a slump that I am experiencing, and that I know I can get over.\n\nI'm currently a junior in high school, and have seemed to really slumped into having a halfway attitude about performance -  academic and athletic especially - from where I had started at the beginning of the year and my prior high school career. In this way, the results that I produce aren't really better or worse but the difference is that I am not motivated or spurred on by anything to improve this work.\n\nI've realized that the only way to really \"wake-up\" and get back into a aspiring, positive, and more hard working mindset is to see the success of others, which in turn makes me realize how much harder I could have worked towards a goal and how much better the outcome could be. This feeling and mindset lasts only for at the longest a week, and this really seems to be what I am asking for help with.\n\nIn what ways can I get out of this desensitization to failure slump, and maintain motivation to do better, even when things are going fine already?", "summary": "Performance in a limbo state, am fine atm settling for \"ok\" or fine only, how can I get out of this mindset and perform better?"}
{"id": "t3_4zd0nf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Sometimes when my [18M] brother [12M] angers me I hit him, and I want to stop it.", "post": "It used to happen more frequently when we were younger  but its gotten better these last few years. Recently however, it's happened 3 times and I felt bad after every incident. \n\nThe first time was when I repeatedly told him not to play with a lighter, he kept on playing with it, and I pushed him to the ground and lightly kicked him. \n\nThen today I had to pick him up from practice, and he told me the wrong place. I got there, he was nowhere to be found. I then called him, yelling at him and told him I was going to kick his ass when I got there. \n\nSo he tells me the right place and I see him with 3 other friends of his. I get out the car, start yelling at him and then go to hit him. He goes to defend himself but I still manage to land a few light hits. I then turn around and yell at his friends. I felt so fucking bad afterwards. I hit my brother and embarrassed him in front of his friends. \n\n Another time I had to take him to the movies and he said something stupid to me in front of his friends and I gave him one hard slap. I felt like a piece of shit. \n\nThe thing is I'm also frustrated at some other things and this was the straw that broke the camel's back. I still feel horrible though. \n\nHow can I stop this? I've noticed he aggravates me when we've been around each other for too long and thankfully I go back to college in 2 weeks.", "summary": "I've hit my brother on multiple occasions when he hasn't listened to me or did something stupid, I've felt bad afterwards every time, and I want to know how I can stop this."}
{"id": "t3_32wb9p", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "First semi major car accident. I really don't know what to do.", "post": "So last week, I purchased a 2003 BMW 330xi from my uncle. I loved the thing. Today, some jackass driving daddy's jaguar to school decided to pull out in front of the car that I was behind, those two cars collided and I didn't have time to stop so I hit the jaguar as well (I was paying attention, I had time to slow down but not come to a complete stop, I went from 45 to about 25 in the few seconds I had) After everything was said and done, the 16 year old was deemed at fault for the collision and got a citation.\n\nSo I am insured with USAA and tomorrow they have some one to coming out to look at the damage to my car and figure out how much it's going to cost. I got a loan through USAA foe $7800 to pay for the car, if the car is considered totaled what is my next move? Can I sue the kid and get him (or his dad) to pay off the loan? (Not saying I will, I just want to know my options)\n\nThe air bag did deploy and I have heard from some people that that can justify the car as totaled but also heard that that shouldn't be an issue. \n\nIf the car isn't totaled, I just pay my deductible and get insurance takes care of the rest, which isn't a big deal.\n\nI just want to know my options if the car is deemed totaled.\n\nThis is my first some what major accident, and my first accident being on my own policy so I am sort of new to all of this so please help me. Thank you!", "summary": "got into car accident. 16 year old was deemed at fault, what are my options if car is considered totaled ($7800 loan with USAA)"}
{"id": "t3_1semtb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Developing a relationship between me (23M) and my friend (22F) after years friendship.", "post": "I have been friends with this girl for a few years, but both of us have been in long term relationships for the entire time. We are now both at the same graduate school while our SOs stayed behind leaving us both in long distance relationships (nearly coast to coast).\n\nBoth of our LDRs didn't work out, and I am starting to develop feelings for my friend for the first time. I've always thought she was amazing in virtually every way, but while we were both unavailable it was never anything more than an amazing friendship. Now that there is a chance I am seeing her more completely, and I can't get her out of my head.\n\nI know we just got out of relationships and it may be a while before either of us is ready for another serious relationship, but I don't remember when I last felt so strongly and clearly about someone and I am willing to wait until were both ready for something serious rather than pushing it to early and ruining my chances at both. How long should I wait? Is there a norm, or is it completely personal?\n\nAssuming I wait the right amount, how do I make the transition from relationship where we both describe the other as a best friend to something romantic? I always hear that if a girl isn't interested, then move on; there are plenty of fish in the sea. But that is not what I am asking about. This isn't about getting any girl, it is about getting this girl. How do I make the transition? We have always flirted a bit and I don't feel like we are at a place where either of us would rule out dating. Is there any expectation that we would still be able to be as good of friends if it doesn't work out, or is there no return once my feelings have developed? Should I just be honest and talk to her; if so, when do I have that talk given our fresh breakups?", "summary": "My best friend and I were both in long term relationships for our entire friendship, but we are now both newly single. Since she's become available I have fallen for her. How do I transition our friendship into romance?"}
{"id": "t3_11sugk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So my best guy friend of about 4 months (20M ) and my best friend of about 1 year/roommate (20, gender queer female), hooked up last night...", "post": "I (20,F) am confused about how I should feel...\n\nSo after an awkward kickback last night, at which I was the 3rd wheel on the couch, two of my best friends spontaneously hooked up.  My roommate has a reputation for being promiscuous, and my best guy friend hasn't had any in awhile. There had never (that I had noticed) been any flirting between them. Of course, both were drunk, and I was kept up all night as they humped the night away. \n\nStrangely, that was not what bothered me the most. I have been in a relatively happy relationship for the past 8 months, and I love my boyfriend (19,M) very much, but I found myself quite jealous. \n\nThere are a few reasons why it could be..\n\n* When I first met my guy friend, he was the one who flirted with me. And he has been showing many signs of feelings towards me since we met. Now, all of a sudden, he hooks up with my roommate. I could just be caught off guard.\n\n* My boyfriend, while very sweet and loving, has commitment issues and has struggled to accept the fact that he has a girlfriend. He has gotten much better and treats me well, except he shows a lot of reluctance in the bedroom. I feel like I am always the one initiating sex, and he rarely shows any sign of sexual wanting for me. I am just butthurt that they're getting if off and i'm not.\n\n* I am starting to develop feelings for my best guy friend while in a committed relationship and I am legitimately jealous. \n\nI would love some help trying to sort this out. Thanks, Reddit!!", "summary": "Best guy friend and best friend/roommate drunkenly and randomly hooked up. I, while in a committed and happy relationship, feel jealous. Need help figuring out why and what to do next. "}
{"id": "t3_2up9mb", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By telling a co-worker she had \"nice melons\"", "post": "So, I work at a grocery store and there was a girl in another department who would always come to grab various fruits and vegetables for platters, sushi. Now on occasion, she would grab Cantaloupe, Honeydey and Watermelon and I would always say she had \"nice melons\". Sometimes when she saw me carrying them, she would say the same thing back to me. It was a nice running joke.\n\nSo one glorious afternoon, were in the produce fridge and I make the joke. No harm right? Wrong. So, apparently a co-worker from the deli was behind a skid fishing out some stuff for the sushi lady that doesnt speak English.\n\nShe's apparently a real hard ass. So she goes and tells her manager that one of the \"kids in produce\" makes sexual comments. Next thing I know I am getting a lecture from my manager about not making sexual comments to co-workers.", "summary": "Made comment \"nice melons\" to a light hearted co-worker, another co-worker overheard and reported me."}
{"id": "t3_2zcq6m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M20] dont know how I should feel about my gf [F20] twerking at the club.", "post": "We have been together for almost 3 years and she likes to dance at clubs I on the other hand do not like to dance at all we have two very different interpretations of what we consider fun but the idea of what she is doing to other guys at the club makes me feel uncomfortable.\n\nWe are an interracial couple she is black and im latino so i am aware that to some degree it is cultural and to me it is a bit of a culture shock but I would just love some insight as to how other people see this situation from a cultural, racial, and relationship perspective because I try to culturally adapt to this but it is a bit of an obstacle for me as I just find dancing in general as awkward", "summary": "relationship of 3 years, interracial, wondering from an outside pov how I should feel about gf twerking on random guys at the club"}
{"id": "t3_3jjo2z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [15 M] GF [14 F] of two months told me how she was blackmailed into having sex a few months back, before we met. She seems to be over it, but it's really bothering me again, and I don't know what to do.", "post": "Me [15 M] and my GF [14 F] have been together for a little over two months now. Pretty early on, she told me how she was blackmailed into having sex with a horrible guy who was only interested in her body (this was about a month before we met). GF started crying the first time she told me and thought I wouldn't think of her the same way again. I understand that it wasn't voluntary, but this isn't the whole problem.\n\nI think this information has had some lasting effects on me. When my GF first told me this, I was infuriated (at the guy who did this, not her), but told her that it's ok, and that she can be a virgin again. We're both religious, so I threw some of that in my explaining to her. \n\nI think I was, and still kinda am again, so angry with this guy because I believe he took something very important form her. I don't want to sound selfish or something, but I can't help but think that your virginity should be something shared with someone very important to you, which we both are to each other. I am a virgin, and have no plans on having sex with my GF anytime soon, but I wanted our virginities to be shared with each other, and now that can't really happen. I tell her (and myself) that virginity is just a concept, but I've still made myself nearly sick thinking about all this. For about a week after she first told me, I cried just thinking about it.\n\nEssentially, I am livid about this guy, because he took my GF's virginity, when I believe that i should've been the one to do that. Whether I'm just being selfish, or we're just young and naive, I'm not sure. All I know is that this is keeping me from thinking clearly throughout the day. Maybe just posting about this will help me out, I don't know.", "summary": "I'm furious at a guy who forcibly took my GF's virginity when I believe that it should have been me to do that, and now that fact is keeping me up at night."}
{"id": "t3_optaw", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I want to try dating an old childhood friend. Could this work?", "post": "Alright, so I'm F25 and he's M27ish.\n\nSo one of my best friends and I met at a summer camp when we were both in primary school. She had a brother a couple years older, and the three of us would go on adventures across the neighborhood and wreak havoc in local playgrounds everywhere. Once high school started, my friend and I started drifting apart. Her family was incredibly religious and mine was becoming increasingly liberal in the changing political climate. Although our families remained friends throughout it all, I can't help but feel her parents seeing us as a bad influence. Although we lived down the street from each other, my friend and her brother were sent to private Christian schools for the rest of their education, giving me fewer reasons to see her or her brother.\n\nYears pass, my friend's brother moves out of state for college, and she follows suite after she's done with high school, and I don't really hear from them until four years later when he moves back home and I decide to solicit his help on a website I wanted to make. I felt like we really bonded over this. He was really cool and incredibly helpful, funny, and smart to boot! Although he went to a private schools, he's very open-minded about civil rights issues, we have similar political affiliations, watch the same TV shows, and he isn't ashamed to like musicals.\n\nMy main problem is that I've had a history of horrible relationships. Not even horrible in the way most people think. I feel like there's a very strong chance I'm asexual. I've been in four big relationships that I felt helped me become the person I am today, and I'm thankful for it, but they all ended with the fact that I was unwilling to have sex with my partner.\n\nI feel a sense of security with him, because I know he would never do anything outside of my comfort zone. However I don't start a lot of relationships because I feel guilty about not being able to satisfy my partners. One of my biggest concerns is that if he does wind up liking me back, and we start dating, and something happens causing us to break up, this could mean bad things for our family's already fragile relationship.\n\nOKSO", "summary": "I have a crush on my friend's brother I've known since we were 8. I'm worried that my sex issues and our family's friendship might be big hindrances. Should I let the feelings slide or go for broke?"}
{"id": "t3_44atnh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M ] with my gf [24 F] of 2 years, GF is much smarter and making me feel insecure", "post": "I started dating my current GF in college, after several years of friendship. We moved in together shortly after college, and now both are working in the same city. \n\nEver since we started living together, the dynamics of the relationship became much more serious compared to the one during college, i.e. she started to plan our finances, living arrangements, even started to talk politics. The problem is, one which I am only starting to realize is, she is far smarter in these than I am. I am kinda an impulsive person who hates planning and thinking through things, and when she ask me to help her with finances or sort out the insurance etc I struggle to be helpful. She doesn't really mind because she is more than capable of doing stuff herself, but the fact that I can't makes me deeply insecure.\n\nWhat's worst is my current relationship reminds me of my parent's, which was really a dysfunctional one. My mom was the smart one, and my dad was at best, average in everything but had a bad case of insecurity mixed with enlarged ego. He had a hard time listening to my mom's advice or opinions and often made bad decisions that he will blame others for. My mom also had an issue, she enjoys belittling my dad and teasing him as dumb or slow, which probably contributed to my dad's insecurity and big ego.\n\nAlthough my GF is really cool now, I am really afraid one day she'll turn into my mom and start treating me like an idiot, because compared to her, I know I am one. Sometimes my fear is so real that it intrude into my thoughts suddenly, for example we are relaxing on the sofa watching TV, this fear comes and makes me think about ending my relationship, out of nowhere.  \n\nHonestly, I don't really know why I am feeling this way, but I certainly feel it and I hate it. I can't bring myself to discuss this insecurity with my GF, so I thought I'd bring it here for advice. Thank you.", "summary": "Starting to realize GF is much smarter than I am, becoming insecure and fearful of future dynamics of our relationship. Thinking of breaking up out of fear I become the idiot husband."}
{"id": "t3_1ue6sb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend and I (25m/25f) live with our friend (27f). Everything would be fine except she never leaves the apartment. What do we do?", "post": "My boyfriend and I live in a large apartment with one of our friends. She's generally a pretty solid roommate. She's a bit messy but usually takes care of her stuff at least once a week and keeps her mess contained in her bedroom. There are a couple problems we keep having, though, and attempts to deal with them haven't worked yet. \n\n1. She's literally always home. My boyfriend and I both work full time. She's on break from school (we both are) and leaves the apartment either for an hour or two during the day to run errands, or not at all for days. I can't tell you the last time I got to be home alone or that my boyfriend and I got to be home alone together. We don't get a lot of time together because of our work schedules so this is annoying. She had promised before to give us some alone time more frequently but she never does. \n\n2. She never stops talking. This is part of the issue with her constantly being around. It's to the point where I avoid watching tv shows and movies around her that I haven't seen because she will talk loudly through the entire thing even after people turn up the volume, stop responding, or shush her. \n\n3. She's constantly high. Like 24/7. I wouldn't really care about this since all of us smoke, except she smokes indoors at like 8am and leaves windows open (it's -10 degrees here lately) or smokes in her bedroom which is 10ft from our front door and our landlord lives upstairs. I'm 24, I'm too old for this shit. We had told her when we moved in to either smoke outside or wait til after 8pm and do it in the bathroom (but close the window after). \n\nNeither my boyfriend or I want to move out and we both care about her but attempts to bring this up to her never work more than for a few days. Some of this is, in my opinion, disrespectful and irresponsible. The other stuff is just annoying. What do we do?", "summary": "Roommate never leaves the house, and is often annoying and irresponsible. Have tried talking to her multiple times and nothing changes. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_3u64gb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] thought I was completely over my [20 F] ex, but since going no contact I have been a mess.", "post": "Me and my ex were together for almost 2 years when we broke up 5 months ago. The breakup was mutual and we decided to try and remain friends. During this period I felt really happy to be single, I felt really good about myself. Over a period of time me and my ex started arguing badly, and I could see that staying friends was not healthy for her as she was starting to become obsessive over me. We decided to go no contact just before I left for university and since then I have been a mess, crying everyday and non stop thinking about her. \n\nI can't sleep, because I just think about her and my mind starts racing about regrets and what I could have done to make the relationship work. I am coming back home for Christmas in a few weeks, and all I can think about is contacting her. I know I shouldn't contact her but it's all I think about and I just don't know what to do to get over her.", "summary": "Broke up with my ex. I was doing really well until we decided to go no contact. Now I can't stop crying and thinking about her."}
{"id": "t3_477fsl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [17 M] parents are overprotective. I helped my friend cheat on an assignment in class, and got caught. Now the school want me to tell them what happened", "post": "For a start what I done was wrong. The other kid involved is getting pulled off the subject. I'm allowed to stay on, and basically got a slap on a wrist and told not to do it again, but I was told to get my parents to phone the school so they can talk about it.\n\nI fully understand I deserve some punishment for what I done, but I've been a straight A student for years. My parents are the type to be slightly disappointed if I barely pass a test. Lately my grades have been slipping, mostly cause I don't actually need most of the subjects I'm doing and am not motivated to study at all, but this will be the nail in the coffin. My friend had asked me to let him copy from mine, since he was really struggling with the course, and I let him. The school caught on, and honestly I feel like an idiot.\n\nBut my parents are so overprotective and I honestly think they'll over-react and think I'm some sort of demon child. I made a mistake, a big one, but they're going to hang this over my head for the rest of the time I'm at school. I already argue with them daily over petty bullshit, but this will be a shitstorm. I'm scared to have to deal with it at all. So, I need to tell my mom in the next couple of hours about it so she can phone the school. How do I work up the courage to tell her? And also convince them this was a one off mistake?", "summary": "I think my overprotective parents will over-react to me letting my friend cheat off my assignment. I'm scared of having to deal with how they react to it. How should I handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_1aoiah", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "SO (20M) leaving for a semester abroad this fall but I'm (20F) pretty sure he doesn't wants a LDR, how do we discuss it?", "post": "Me (20F) and SO (20M)\n\nWe have been together for 10 months and so far the relationship has been amazing. Definitely not perfect but close.\n\nMy boyfriend recently got accepted into an exchange program at a university in another country (ca 3 hour flight). He will leave sometime in August and most likely return around Christmas. I would be able to visit him once or twice during that time. There's also a slight possibility he might stay for a second semester.\n\nWe've discussed him studying abroad quite a lot, but there's one question I haven't asked him out of fear: Whether or not he wants us to stay together while he's abroad. I want us to try long-distance while he's away but I'm not sure he does. I am absolutely terrified that he'll say he wants us to break up. How do I start that discussion? What do I say?", "summary": "Boyfriend will be studying in another country next semester, I want us to try long-distance, he might not. How do I start that discussion?"}
{"id": "t3_1pd7za", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M27/F24] Roomates with [M24] who has his girlfriend[F18] over nightly, claims she doesnt live here.", "post": "Am I right to be upset about her being at the house but not contributing in anyway?\n\nIt started out very slow, she would spend a night here and there. And it wasnt a problem. Then slowly she starts spending a lot more time here. At one point early on, she ended up staying a week without returning to her home. I asked my roommate about it and he was shocked and claimed he didnt realize she had been at the house that long. I shrugged it off and asked that it didn't happen again. Everything was fine for a while, and then she started letting herself in without knocking. I personally feel this is disrespectful to the rest of the housemates, am I wrong about this? Is this the norm these days?\n\nI asked them to have her please knock when arriving at the house, and she does, but then proceeds to enter the house anyway. I let this go as they are doing as I asked. \n\nThe next issue I have is her here without him, and even more so, her here without ANYONE else. I can understand her arriving before he does if they have plans, or shortly after he leaves. But hours before or after seems to be a bit excessive. And being here when no one else is I feel is defiantly out of line. When these things started happening. I asked my roommate if she is living here. And he said that she does not. I repeated my concerns, but this time they seemed to have fallen flat. Lately she has been here everyday and night it seems. It is rare that her car is not in the driveway. \n\nAm I wrong for feeling that they are past the line with this?", "summary": "Roommates girlfriend is here almost everynight and is at the house when no one else is here. Am I wrong for being upset that they  say she doesnt live here?"}
{"id": "t3_4izzwe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my FWB(?) [25 F] of a few months, do I tell her about someone I slept with a while ago, that is coming on the same trip as us?", "post": "Okie dokie! So, pretty simple situation, I just need other peoples opinions. Been seeing this girl for a few months, nothing serious at the start and still nothing too serious as of yet. But as we all know, the more time you spend with someone, the closer you get. So we're certainly getting closer.\n\nAnyways, in a few months time me and quite a few friends have organized a fun little trip away and we have got quite a sizeable group coming along with us. Now the problem is, it was very much a 'invite all your friends along' type situation so we have friends of ours inviting other friends etcetc. Now, one of my friends has unknowingly invited someone whom I have slept with before, which is fine as we still get along just fine and never even mention what happened between us. However, the girl I am seeing is coming on the trip with us.\n\nSo the question is, do I tell her about my history with this other girl or not? There's literally nothing between myself and that other girl anymore, but of course its hard to tell as to whether the girl I'm seeing would rather know, or not know. For you girls out there, would you want me to tell you about this other girl before the trip, or would you prefer I just think nothing of it and hope to God it doesn't come up whilst we're all hanging out?\n\nIts not a big deal to me at all (the history), but it very well could be a big deal for the girl I'm seeing. Options?", "summary": "Going on group trip with the girl I'm seeing and a girl I have previously slept with. Do I tell the girl I'm seeing about my history with this other girl?"}
{"id": "t3_48oywr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(16/m) My girlfriend (15/f) isn't very interesting to text", "post": "So I just got hooked up with a girl a couple weeks ago by my friends, the first relationship of my life (hers too) and we're both pretty shy, introverted, and like the same things. After the first date, she warmed up extremely quickly and made the first advances, and was super affectionate in general. We text every day, for hours upon hours but the conversations are rarely interesting. Over texting, her replies are usually only a few words in length and are only replies to questions I ask about her. She's still super affectionate, and frequently makes reference to how \"I'm the best decision I've ever made\", calls me cute and babe all the time, says she anticipates our next date, will occasionally use some innuendos followed by \";)\" yet never asks questions about me or brings up topics of conversation. Her non-flirting replies only answer my question directly, with no intention of moving forward the discussion. Sometimes, I'll take a 5 minute break from texting (she always replies instantly, so points for eagerness?) to see if she'll come up with anything on her own. She invariably doesn't. \n\nTo be frank, if it weren't for her frequent references to her attraction towards me, and the fact that she always initiates the conversations, it would appear that she has no interest in me at all.\n\nThe way I see it, she's either:\n\n1. Only attracted to me physically and not for my person (interests etc.) which doesn't make much sense considering I'm slightly overweight and not particularly attractive.\n\n2. Doesn't really like me but wants to put in the minimum effort to keep the relationship going, since I'm her first and she likely has no other alternatives, as neither do I\n\n3. Texting just isn't her thing\n\nNone of these bode well, but she's a really nice person and extremely pretty and I don't want to lose this opportunity. What do you guys think?\n\nAlso, if it's relevant I was recently diagnosed with clinical depression and have a tendency to get paranoid, thinking everyone hates me, and generally overrexaggerate things. Is it a possibility that I'm just delusional and everything's fine?", "summary": "my gf isn't interesting to talk to, but not 100% sure it's because of a lack of interest on her part (I'm very socially inexperienced, not very good at picking up cues)"}
{"id": "t3_3znglr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Housemate/Tenant [24F] made plans to leave and when they fell through I went ahead with them.", "post": "So late 2014 I was kind enough to provide a house to a friends gf who was struggling to find a place to live. I thought it was great because I'd get to see them both a lot more. I own the house and was looking for a roommate/tenant anyway\n\nShe moved in and sure enough they were around all the time etc, we all got along really well. Over the year she started spending more and more time at his parents house because they cooked for her, did her laundry etc. It annoyed me because I didn't like living by myself, but I never made an issue of it and moved on. Learned to live with it. \n\nIt got to a point where she'd only come back to pick up clothes say hello and leave again. I'd go weeks without seeing her. When she announced that she and her bf were moving in with another mate of ours I was thrilled. So I started making plans for a new housemate, I got a great person and it was full steam ahead.\n\nShe then told me her plans fell through, and I said well the plans I made in reaction to yours are still going ahead, so I'll need you to commit to your departure date as specified by you (6 weeks away) she exploded at me saying it was disrespectful to make plans after her plans were only proposed and not concrete (she never told me that) I explained that I was sticking to my plans for my own personal reasons and that I was sick of living by myself and didn't expect her to live there more and I was getting someone else in with the hope of having company. \n\nNo contact for two days and she sent me this moody passive aggressive message saying she'll have to move in to her bf's parents house and she'll be out in 2 weeks. So I told the next roommate that we could bring the timeline up, she was happy. We are now very rapidly approaching the 2 week deadline and nothing of hers has left the house yet.\n\nAm I being too harsh?", "summary": "Roomate is non-existent, so when she made plans to go, I made plans of my own. Her plans fell through, now I'm the bad guy."}
{"id": "t3_js7re", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My girlfriends grandma caught us making out on her couch.", "post": "I was at my girlfriends house for the 3rd time this past weekend and her grandma caught us making out on the couch, she was really pissed and yelled at her about us being disrespectful, and that i also quit football so now she thinks I'm lazy i guess, she also said the usual \"that boy only has one thing on his mind\" phrase and now i don't think she'll even let us cuddle on the couch while watching a movie.I'm going to call her around 7:30( so that my girlfriend won't be there) and i was just looking for tips on what i should do or say.", "summary": "Me and my gf got caught making out on her gmas couch, i have to call her and apologize, what should i say, and what should i do?"}
{"id": "t3_2mwwk3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Gf [24F] keeps talking to guy from work.", "post": "This argument keeps coming up every once in a while but I finally want to kno if I'm in the wrong or not. \n\nSo my gf has a male coworker who likes her and I kno this because I've seen texts that he has sent her. The questions that I can remember r questions like \"do u work and school only?\" Do u live close by?\" Basically getting to kno u questions and I kno these r questions that guys usually use when they r into someone cuz I've done them. And I told her he liked her but she didn't believe me. Eventually I saw questions like \"when u gonna let me take u out?\", \"u should come out with the group tonite or do u need ur bf permission?\" So finally she realized that yes he likes her.\n\nNow I've told her I don't like her socializing with him cuz I kno how guys are. She counters with \"he has a gf so don't worry\" but that still doesn't set my mind at ease. I trust her completely but before he tries anything that will offend me or her I rather just nip it in the bud.\n\nThe other nite I get called from her sister saying that she hasn't come home from work yet eventually an hour passes and she shows up at home. When I question her about it she tells me that she stayed in the parking lot talking to him and someone else. Now I kno she didn't do anything but it's just the thought of her interacting with someone that likes her and doesn't acknowledge that she has a bf. \n\nAm I wrong?", "summary": "Gf talks to guy who likes her but she won't stop talking to him even tho it bothers me immensely. "}
{"id": "t3_1xtv5a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex (F/24) and I (F/23) broke up a year ago because she cheated after 2.5 years together. Now she's come back into contact and I would appreciate advice.", "post": "I will keep this brief as I can.\n\nWe were together 3^^(ish) years (lived together for 2), but the last 7 months were pretty shitty.\n\nStandard story - she met someone else and was hiding it. Every time I questioned it she would twist it round to be my fault. I was paranoid/clingy/didn't want her to have other friends. I ended up being quite sick because of constant anxiety, but she didn't stop.\n\nEventually of course it all came out and we broke up, but had to live out the rest of our shared lease...which was not fun at all. She didn't show any remorse and continued seeing this other girl, even though she had a gf.\n\nAfter our lease ran out I moved to another country (1000 miles away) to get away and get a fresh start and began cutting her out my life.\n\nIt's been 7 months now since I saw her, and 5 months since we last had contact. But this week she sent an email saying she started counselling 3 months ago and is in a completely different place and realises how she acted like a prick and would like to talk, even if meant travelling to my country to do so.\n\nI agreed. And she's coming next weekend to talk.\n\nBut now I have no idea what to do. Can people really work past this sort of thing?", "summary": "Seeing Ex for the first time in 7 months to talk. Now confused how I feel about the situation. Would like advice/anecdotes on people who have gotten back with cheating exes."}
{"id": "t3_xt3f4", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I've been texting this girl, but I've never met her in person...", "post": "So I'm about to go to college (18/m) in a few weeks. I met this girl (18/f) on the Book of Faces (Facebook, for those of you with no abstract thinking capabilities) and we got talking and eventually she gave me her number and we texted each other. We've been texting for at least a month at this point, and I really like her. I don't know why, because I've never met her in person. I'm thinking of asking her out, but of course I want to hang out with her in person first. And I'm pretty sure she likes me too. Reddit, what do I do when I first meet her to let her know I might be interested? Also what would be some fun things to text her to keep her interested in me?\n\nAdditional info: We both have a mutual friend and this friend said she'd put in a good word for me.", "summary": "Met girl on Facebook, chatted and texted, really like her, going to college, need to know what to do when I meet her there in person. Also fun things to text her."}
{"id": "t3_50kgxu", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Why can't I find a fitness hobby?", "post": "I have been desperately looking for something that is not running or weight lifting because I just find them boring. I don't get excited about lifting big numbers or running a long distance very quickly.\n\nI tried MMA/Muay Thai/Brazilian Jiu Jitsu for a few months and just can't get into it. I thought it was because I just sucked at it (and yes I still suck at it) but I just don't enjoy it. \n\nI tried Crossfit for a few weeks and realized that I liked it even less than the MMA classes.\n\nOther things I have tried for less amount of time are rock climbing, biking, baseball, flag football, obstacle races...you get the point.\n\nSo once again I am back to picking up that heavy thing and putting it back down for how ever many reps and then running.\n\nThe", "summary": "of this is....what else is out there? Am I doomed to hate every second of trying to be more healthy?"}
{"id": "t3_45p2ab", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with my husband [32 M] martied 7 months, found out he lied to me before we got married", "post": "If you check my other post, you'll get the back story. Please read it before you judge me. But long story short, husband recently told me he will cut off a female friend that had been trying to break us from the beginning, explained in the other post.\n\nI didn't fully believe him after reading a comment on my previous post so I snooped his emails with her. I found out that in summer 2014 while I was in a different city, he went on a weekend trip with her and her male friends to a different city. As far as I remember he had told me he was going to visit his family. We had been together for a year at that point.\n\nI'm very hurt and upset. My mom tells me to let it go and move on since he recently told me he'd stop talking to her. I can't help but remember this lie each time I look at him. It's him that lied to me, not her. I don't know what to do. I'm afraid of bringing it up because I found out through snooping. What should I do?", "summary": "found out through snooping that husband hid a weekend trip with female friend before marriage.  He recently said he'd cut her off. Should I keep quiet or say something? I'm pretty hurt."}
{"id": "t3_39fn67", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [m/20] found out one of my closest mates [m/19] was seeing the girl [f/18] I had a brief thing with and he knew I was in love with, and he had been trying to keep it a secret from me.", "post": "A while ago I had a brief thing with a girl at my university about whom I was head over heels. She called it off giving the usual bullshit about how she didn't want a relationship having recently come out of a three year one, \"it's me not you\", \"I would in different circumstances\"... I was devestated and refused to give it up. \n\nI trust very few people with details about my love life but this friend of mine Jack is one of them. I thought he didn't keep many secrets from me but he mentioned a couple of times about this girl that he was seeing in college. He wouldn't tell me who it was, instead saying that first I had to tell him the name of the girl I slept with that nobody knows about (I don't like telling people about that kind of thing).\n\nLast night I asked another close mate of ours who the girl was and he told me it was this girl I had been so into. Of course Jack can see whoever he wants but I am so angry that he at least didn't have the respect for me to tell me that it was happening. He actively tried to keep it a secret from me whilst everyone else knew. I would follow the rules and state the duration but I have no idea. I was left still trying to chase this girl and embarrassing myself in front of everyone.\n\nI was in such a bad way last night that the police had to come and put me under watch so that I didn't attempt to harm myself or kill myself.\n\nIs my anger justified? Is this just life and I have to move on? I don't feel like I can ever get along with him again, let alone trust him.", "summary": "One of my closest mates kept it a secret from me that he was seeing the girl that he knew I was head over heels with and  had briefly had a thing with. I feel angry and betrayed"}
{"id": "t3_glnin", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "The wise and moral of Reddit, I caught my sister sleeping with another man.  Her boyfriend takes care of me and I live with him, what do I do?", "post": "From the beginning.\n\nI caught my sister cheating on her boyfriend.  I was up in my room playing on the computer when I heard the TV from downstairs.  It was louder than usual so I opened my door, and creeped towards the stairs.  I then began to hear some heavy breathing under the noise of the TV so I walked on the balls of my feet and peeked around the corner of the stairway and lo and behold, my sister is riding this 5 foot 6, fat, Filipino man (not that there is anything wrong being Filipino), who was a friend she had just recently met.  I had to restrain every fiber of my being from charging down those stairs and tearing that man apart, it was honestly very tough Reddit.  But I restrained myself and walked back to my room to mope.\n\nI did not confront her immediately afterward.  \n\nIt wasn't until the guy had knocked on the door about a few days later (her boyfriend just left for a trip out of state for a week) that I could not allow it to continue.  I took my sister upstairs, told her I knew and tried to press it into her mind that her boyfriend loves her very much.  He treats her great and even the house we are currently living in with him, he had bought so he could start a family with her.\n\nShe said she wouldn't do it again but also after our conversation had left to hangout with him.\n\nNow I know this sounds naive because it could be possible she is still cheating on him but she gave me her word that she would not.  I just don't know what I should do because I do have major guilt.  This guy has essentially taken care of me, he has allowed me to live with him for the past year for free and has even fed me (I have been having trouble getting a job).", "summary": "My sister cheated on her boyfriend, I caught her.  I confronted her, she said it won't happen again.  Boyfriend essentially takes care of me, gives me food and a place to stay."}
{"id": "t3_29169o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend (23,F) is mad at me (24,M) for wanting to go to a family event with her?", "post": "So my girlfriend's aunt has this party thing coming up in a couple months she told me about a while ago. She said I could come if I wanted, but stressed I didn't have to. I genuinely wanted to go because I knew it would make her happy to have me there. Since I have a bunch of friends in the city that the event is near, I figured it would be the perfect weekend to go see them as well as attend the party.\n\nThe location recently changed to a city about two hours away from where it was originally thought to be. Since I already told my friends I would see them that weekend, I hatched this new plan of going to see my friends on Friday and then hopping a bus to the city where the party is on Saturday, since my girlfriend won't be there until then anyway. I thought this was a no-brainer great solution, when I told her she seemed mad. She said \"I'm just confused, it seemed like you originally didn't even want to go. All that traveling seems like a waste of money, it makes more sense just to stay with your friends.\" Now she just seems bitter and weird about it. So where did I go wrong? What does she actually want me to do?", "summary": "Trying to juggle seeing my friends and attending girlfriend's aunt's party, she is upset at my decision to do both."}
{"id": "t3_sehm5", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "I might have found my ultimate motivation, however I'm not sure it could ever be done on a predictable basis. Maybe the wolves can help me?", "post": "**Basically it comes down to me being a very stubborn person.** \n\nIf someone doesn't believe in me, I'd do everything to be able to say *\"I told you so\"* right in front of them. \n\n I haven't run for about half a year, but yesterday I jokingly said to someone \"I'm gonna start running again tomorrow\" and she just laughed out loud. Now I'm lying here in my robe after showering off all the sweat from the run. Also, my boss believed that I couldn't finish this application within this week. It's Tuesday, and I'm done already. \n\nWhen I think back, this happens all the time. however once I've proved them wrong, I don't go out of my way to keep it up, because I get the sense of accomplishment. \n\nI'm already getting some nice daily habits making a relatively productive person compared to myself a year ago, however this trick really shoots me through the roof. \n\n**The point/", "summary": "Is there any way to get the feeling of someone not believing in me, causing me to do everything to prove them wrong, without making it seem artificial?"}
{"id": "t3_4630pa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24F] mum [61] is overbearing. I got my nose pierced last week, and she's going to be mad and I'm scared.", "post": "First ever post, meep. Sorry if this may seem more relevant to /r/piercings but the affect on the relationships with my parents concerns me more than the piercing itself!\n\nI've wanted piercings since I was 16 and as my parents wished, I waited until I'd finished high school, university and my masters degree before I got any. I'm now doing a PhD, and in the past year I got a number of piercings on my ears. Last week I got my nose pierced. I'm seeing my parents tonight.\n\nMy mum has always been overbearing and she gets obsessive over things that really don't matter. We don't have the best of relationships at all anyway but she sees piercings as a hindrance to my job prospects, yet I'm in a field at the moment that doesn't care and I'm happy to remove them if needs be. Basically she doesn't like them, so she feels I'm not allowed to either.\n\nI'm going to be bridesmaid at my cousin's wedding in a month and I intend to take it out for the day. My cousin is happy for me to have piercings, multicoloured hair, whatever! But I know my mum and my auntie (cousin's mum) will want it removed for the day so that's what I'm going to do out of respect for them. \n\nI told my dad I was thinking of getting my nose pierced a few weeks ago and he said \"I'm not going to lie, I don't like them, but it's your face, whatever.\"\n\nI'm just terrified right now of what my mum is going to say and would appreciate some rationale if possible.", "summary": "My mum is overbearing about a nose piercing despite me being reasonable and waiting until I'm an adult. How can I help her see this?"}
{"id": "t3_ffew8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Best friend's wife is taking advantage of him, ruining his life, and I'm afraid to get involved.  Help.", "post": "My closest friend has been married for a year and a half now to a woman who completely walks all over him and doesn't bring a single good thing to the table.  She has gotten worse and worse over the last year, and currently makes him do all the household work (cleaning, cooking, fixing things, snow removal, dishes, laundry, etc).  I just found out last night that she is now quitting her job with no prospects for a new one.  He works full time, somewhat manual labor, in a high stress position.  The job she left was at a bookstore, and she quit because it was too hard and she \"didn't like it\".  She also has a new (gas guzzling) car that they make payments on, while he drives an old beater because they cannot afford anything more.  She is constantly telling him he can't buy things like a certain grocery item he wants because it's \"too expensive\", while she goes and buys designer clothing at the mall often.  The worst part is that she is a massive \"feminist\" (read: hypocrite) and feels as if she is entitled to an easy life and should be taken care of.  She also treats him like shit on a daily basis and is not afraid to order him around and berate him, even right in front of me.  The final straws for me have been his recent need to start taking anti-depression meds, and her deciding to quit her job.  He is absolutely blind to how bad the situation is (or possibly in denial), and anytime I mention something about it, he gets very defensive and sticks up for everything she does. We spend a ton of time together and have been friends for 15 years, but I'm afraid he will completely close off to me if I sit him down and tell him everything I see and explain how badly he is being treated.  I really do not want to lose his friendship, as it means the world to me, but I feel so horrible letting her treat him like this without trying to change the situation.  Reddit, what do you think I should do?", "summary": "Best friend is completely taken advantage of and having his life ruined by his selfish wife, and I'm afraid he'll side with her and I'll lose his friendship if I try to confront him to help the situation."}
{"id": "t3_3oy86u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What will my [24M] relation be to my mother's [50F] soon to be child be [0 M or F].", "post": "It sounds simple enough but it really isn't. I'll try to be brief. My uncle's girlfriend is going to be having a baby soon, and they aren't sure if it's his or not. Either way they can't afford to having another kid, so they asked my mother if she'd adopt him/her. She and her husband (my step dad not biological father) agreed. Which is great and we're all incredibly happy if it all works out!\n\nNow my question is what exactly will my relation to this kid be? If my uncle is the dad that makes him/her my biological cousin. If not then biologically I'm not related to this kid at all. So then the kid will be adopted by my mother and step dad, making the kid either my half brother or sister, but also my cousin maybe...?\nBut either way he or she will be my adopted half brother or sister but also my cousin? But adopted and potentially biological?  And isn't half brother or sister sharing one biological parent?\n\nI'm fairly confused. I'm just interested in know what exactly this kid's relation to me will be.  Plus I have a fascination with complicated family ties.", "summary": "Mother is adopting my uncle's kid who may or may not be his and I'm confused as to what the official relation to this child I will have."}
{"id": "t3_2lnhzy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by evacuating a psych ward", "post": "Today (a few weeks a go) I was a patient in a small open psych ward. It was Sunday, the one day a week that we were allowed to sleep in past 7:30 am, and I had to get early up to play in a gig. \n\nSo my alarm goes off at 6:50 am, and I get up to make some breakfast. I put my bread in the toaster and put the kettle on, get the milk out and all that, but I realise I forgot to grab my own tea bags an mug I brought with me, so I go back to my room to grab them. I'm walking back to the kitchen when these red lights start flashing, and sirens, and a really weird voiceover saying 'evacuate, evacuate'. \n\nSo staff are pouring out of their hidey holes and making sure everyone is getting out of bed, and all of a sudden there's a small army of very tired, very angry psychologically damaged/frail youths. I rush into the kitchen to discover that my toast hadn't burnt but was smoking a little bit. I eject the toast to find that it isn't even toast yet.\n\nEveryone is rushed outside while staff do mandatory room checks. The fucking fire brigade show up. I'm crying, there's an army of youths whose sleep in I stole, and staff are laughing at me and trying to explain to the fireys that we don't need them. Apparently after the same thing had happened a few months back, they had decided to re-jig the alarm to stop it from happening again and fucking didn't.\n\nI got to the gig, but when I went back, everyone was angry at me, except for the few friends I had made on the inside.", "summary": "I ruined the once a week sleep in from my fellow psych ward inhabitants by trying to make toast and setting off the fire alarm at 7 am."}
{"id": "t3_28ywwd", "subreddit": "books", "title": "I can't believe it took me 23 years to read The Count of Monte Cristo!", "post": "I'm a big fan of classics, so when I found out my wife's favorite book ever was The Count of Monte Cristo, I was intrigued as to why. Of course I had heard of it before back in literature class in high school, but I never had been motivated to pick it up and read it. I guess I thought I'd be missing out on several books by reading this one instead since, unabridged, it clocks in at over 1200 pages. Let me just say, I am so glad I finally worked up the courage to start, because, once I did, I couldn't put it down. I was dead to the rest of the world. The story is absolutely beautiful, and I really feel like Edmond Dantes exemplified a great literary hero we can all appreciate. Also, I have really enjoyed getting to know my wife better by reading and loving her favorite book. I don't mean to ramble, but after finishing The Count, I felt impelled to post to encourage anyone out there to pick it up and read it. It might seem like you aren't getting anywhere at first, and even in the middle, but the plot will unfold beautifully and you will be left extremely satisfied, and probably sad the story is only 1200 pages. You will not be disappointed!\n\nWAIT AND HOPE!", "summary": "The Count of Monte Cristo is one of my new favorite books of all time, and I wish I had read it sooner. Don't ever be intimidated by a book's length. You may be really missing out on something great!"}
{"id": "t3_17csc3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend (26) moving in with me (20f) for convenience?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have known each other for almost 2 years now, been dating for almost 3 months of that time.\n\nHis truck just broke down and he can't afford a new one, so he's been bicycling to his current job. He was just offered a better job that is only a couple miles from my place, but way too far for him to bike to from his house (25-30 miles).\n\nI told him he could just crash at my place to get to his new job, but he said he might as well just live with me full time because it made no sense to pay rent at his place and only be there a couple days a week. I totally agree with that. He also said he didn't want to invade my personal space or be a nuissance and would only move in if I was 100% sure about it. \n\nI'd love to be able to spend more time with him that living together would allow because right now we both work 60 hour weeks and it's hard to find time to do anything but fall asleep together watching a movie. And I do see myself with him in the long run, although I wouldn't say I love him yet.\n\nMy concern is that it's too much, too soon. I don't want to ruin the mystery, get too comfortable, wear each other out, or rush things in any way that could put a damper on the relationship. \n\nAnybody have advice or personal stories about living with an SO? Too soon or otherwise.\n\nI should mention that we're having a sit down talk about it tomorrow, I just really need to discuss it a little beforehand to get my thoughts straight.", "summary": "Boyfriend (26) and I (20f) have known each other for 2 years, been together for 3 months. Is it a terrible idea to move in together in order for him to take a better job?"}
{"id": "t3_2e3ca0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me(19m) and my gf(9f) decided to end our 2 year long distance relationship because we were sad. Story below", "post": "Dear reddit, I really need to get this out of my chest.\nWell, in high school I (today 19m) started to see my bestfriend (today 19f) differently, and discovered she was actually a wonderful girl, so we fell in love with each other, dated and had a perfect relationship of 2 years. \n\nAt the end of high school, I decided that I was going to undergraduate in a course that doesnt exist in my city, so I had to move and we decided to keep togheter and start a long distance relationship.\n\nI used to visit her twice a month, she couldnt visit me because she studies in a  very hard university and has classes even on saturday.\n\nAfter 6 months in a long distance relationship, we started to notice that there was too much suffering, and I started to have financial problems and couldn't afford the tickets to go see her.\n\nWe decided to break up and be just friends, I know its very hard, but not impossible. She is a wonderful girl, very supportive and gives the best advices Ive ever heard! I cant let her disappear of my life.\n\nThe problem is, after 2 weeks we broke up, she doesn't respond my texts, she said she likes me very much and dont think will fall in love with anyone as she fell wjth me, and I dont see how we can maintain a friendship with her attitude(not responding texts).\nI am still in love with her!\n\nOther thing is that I am not really liking my course, and really want to do other course back in my town, but that only will be possible in the begining of 2015.\n\nSo, people of reddit, do you think we can stay friends? Do you think we can get back togheter if I go back to my town? Do have any advice or coments to do?\n\nThanks in advance!! :)", "summary": "Me(19m) and my ex- gf(19f) ended our relationship, because long distance wasnt working. We still like each other. Can we be friends or get back togheter in the future?"}
{"id": "t3_1pcczp", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (24/F) think I need to sever ties with my sister(26/F). Any advice is appreciated.", "post": "I am a 24/F, my sister is 26/F. Here is a small background on our relationship:\nOur entire lives we have fought. When we were younger it was fist fighting and as we got older it became more verbal. My sister is very manipulative, my parent even admit it. They have said, \"We don't know where we went wrong raising your sister.\" Regardless, they love her and deal with her shenanigans; mostly they because they usually aren't directed at them. Things in our relationship came to a head about a year ago and we had what I call a \"come to Jesus meeting.\" We said our issues, spoke our piece and agreed we wanted a relationship with each other and we would try to get to know each other on the adult level and have a clean slate in regards to our relationship. Since then, she hasn't changed. She uses my strong relationship and feelings of obligation towards my parents as leverage to try to manipulate me. She has hacked my email, puts her friends before me, talks trash about my husband and kicks me when I am down. She is constantly trying to find ways to be superior to me. The events that have happened recently are the straws that have broken the camels back. I feel I should sever ties because this relationship is no healthy and I don't deserve to be treated this way. My parents and my sister always expect I will just get over her drama, but I no longer wish to feed into the cycle. Severing ties will alienate me from my niece and nephew and will upset my parents, but I don't know what else to do. I have debated talking to a family counselor for suggestions. Any input or advice, especially from people who have dysfunctional sibling relationships would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "My sister is a narcissist and treats me and our relationship like crap. I want to sever ties with her, but it will alienate me from her kids and will upset my parents."}
{"id": "t3_39zx4k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] have decided to stay and work abroad long term, but am not sure how to break it to my parents [50sM/F]", "post": "Two weeks ago, I flew from north eastern America to southern Australia to spend a month with my boyfriend and his family. Everything here has been going really well and I'm really liking Australia. I want to get a work permit and stay here longer.\n\nHowever, I'm not really sure how to tactfully tell this to my parents. They've always been overprotective. For example, they felt uncomfortable about me walking down my own street when I was 20 years old and I only was able to by basically telling them \"I'm 20 and I'm going to do it\" when I decided to walk home one night. So telling them that I plan to stay abroad on another continent is going to be difficult. I know I could just be blunt, but I'd like to explain it to them in a way that they will feel as least anxious/upset as possible.", "summary": "Planning to stay on a completely different continent long term with my boyfriend and don't know how to best tell my overprotective parents this"}
{"id": "t3_3s0cjs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] In love with my good friend [20 F] of four years, feeling have persisted for 2 years. Want to tell her, not in hopes of a relationship but for my sake of mind. How to Proceed?", "post": "Hey guys! \n\nthis is the age old question, I'm in love with a good friend. Met in high school, had a crush on her but I wasn't confident enough at the time due to personal self-esteem issues and never spilled the beans. \n\n2 years later, feelings still persist and now that I've had a chance to work through my issues some of that confident has been regained and now it's constantly nagging me that I haven't told her how I feel. \n\nI don't expect her to feel the same way about me, at this point I want to tell her just so it's out in the open and I can get some peace of mind. \n\nThe problem is that during the four years we've been friends, we've become pretty close and I'm scared of losing the friendship and of making her feel like the past 3 years of friendship have been me trying to get in a relationship with her, which they haven't. Her friendship has been an honest and delightful one. \n\n She honestly makes me happy, we have similar senses of humor, she's one of the smartest and most beautiful people I know. but I think the friendship is ultimately more important than any other feelings I have for her but I don't know how to convey that without sounding like I'm making excuses for myself and undermining the last three years. \n\nLike I said, I'm not expecting a relationship. Just because my eyes light up because of her doesn't mean hers will do the same because of me. \n\nSorry for such a classic and probably over-asked question.", "summary": "In love with best friend of 4 years, want to preserve the friendship but have the constant nagging sensation that I should tell her I've been crushing on her for a while. Scared, a bit sad and overwhelmed. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2rxwah", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (18m) with the friend (17f) of my \"ex\" so to speak. We are pretty into each other, I need an opinion from some on that isn't a horny teenage boy. (My friends, 18m)", "post": "First of all, thank you for anyone who takes the time to read this and help me with my life a bit. \n\nThe breakdown: I hung out in a romantic context with a girl (17f) around 5 times, we kissed occasionally, nothing more. I'll call her Clara. Clara just got out of a 3 year relationship and told me she wasn't ready to do it again so she ended things. I found out that the real reason is so she can sext other guys with impunity. That sucks and she shouldn't have lied but still totally her decision. There's a lot of other reasons, but long story short, I'm not going to pursue that relationship any further and it kind of just started out of nowhere to begin with. This was 2 months ago.\n\nHowever, her best friend (17f) and I get along really well. I'll call her Grace. Long story short again, I feel great around Grace and things just seems to work between us. Shes honestly just a wonderful human being in general. It's obvious we both really like each other.\n\nThe issue: I want to have a relationship with Grace, but due to this history between Clara and I it seems like I should get another perspective before moving forward. Is it fair, reasonable and acceptable for Grace or myself to pursue a relationship with one another? I don't want to ruin their friendship but I do really like this girl.\n\nIn a properly functioning society the decision might be obvious. But keep in mind, this is high school, and Clara is a very competitive and jealous person that thrives on attention. The relationship that she fostered between was narcissistic in nature and based purely on the fact that she wanted a handsome and successful trophy in her life. I don't believe she is evil, she definitely has her good qualities, but I felt it was important to not overlook her negative ones, especially in this circumstance.", "summary": "I don't know how women think. I want to date the best friend of a girl I was recently romantic with but don't want to ruin everyone's lives and friendship."}
{"id": "t3_2aimyz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 F] with my BF [21 M] 1.7 years, found out he left me for another girl and was publicaly dating her 2 days after our breakup.", "post": "we had a great relationship and the breakup was out of nowhere. Just before the breakup he took me out  on a nice date and bought me flowers.\n\nFast forward a little bit and he sends me text saying we need to talk and i'm going to hate him. He tells me he doesnt know what he wants in a relationship and wants to figure out what he wants in life blah blah. I was very hurt but decided I could be friends with him in a couple monthes once school starts.\n\nWe have been broken up for about a month when I found out that he had met another girl while we were dating. He claims all they did was talk and hangout but they started dating two days after we broke up. This girl is already hanging with his family and everything makes me feel like it was longer than two weeks and was intense\n\nI was over the breakup but finding out he did this to me really hurts. Inever expected him to do anything like this. All he could say was I didn't mean for it to happen it just did\n\nI feel so lonely and don't even know how to date.", "summary": "Found out boyfriend actually left me for another girl. I feel so hurt and lonely. Help! how do i get over this? how do i date new people?"}
{"id": "t3_2cawr6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I think my long term boyfriend and I would be better off as best friends...", "post": "I'm 22 (F) and my boyfriend is 23. We have been together for almost 2 and a half years, but I feel like he is just with me because it's easy. I really love him, but he makes it such a point to not be romantic. The only time I feel that he is love with me is when we have sex, but besides that I feel like we are better for as friends. Of course, things get more complicated is that we are both from the US and we are moving to the UK for grad school. Our plan was get an apartment together, but I don't think I can continue our relationship as it is. I really love him and I'm not mad at him, but I don't know what to do.", "summary": "I love my boyfriend, but I think he is only with me because it's easy. We're moving out of the country for grad school...."}
{"id": "t3_2cqnxb", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by unintentionally exposing my boss' 3 year old daughter to the circle of life.", "post": "I work at a horse barn and the sparrows are literally a plague.  We've managed to oust a lot of them once we bought a BB gun, as it's helping rid us of birds and allowing us to take out some stress on the feathered shits.  \n\nSo we've got the horses ridden, and we're (My boss, his daughter, and my co worker) sitting around bullshitting, like the usual.  I see this little sparrow feebly fly towards the wall and cling to the wall for dear life.  So, seeing an opportunity, I jump up from my seat, and go fetch this little thing.  I reach up on the wall and cup it into a hand, and a momma bird tries to dive bomb me but I retrieve the bird, and excited that I caught one I go show the boss' kid.  \n\nShe's a cute girl, and she's aww'ing over the 'baby' bird, and petting it's head and whatnot.  Alright, time to set this bird free so he can go fly up to the rafter with his noisy-ass mother.  Go to the indoor arena with the kid and I open my hands, and the little bird takes off, and struggles to get some height.  And then the fuckup.\n\nCoworkers puppy (8 month old I think)  sees the fluttery thing, and takes off after it, jumps, and catches the bird.  It squeaked as the pup's jaws closed on it.  \n\nThe little girl standing beside me gasped, hands over her mouth.  Boss and coworker started busting a gut, but I felt terrible.", "summary": "Caught a baby bird in the barn, showed it to boss' kid, and set it free again, and coworkers dog catches it in mid flight and kills it."}
{"id": "t3_2skxqx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31F] with my ?? 'undefined' [27M] known of him for years, gotten closer and physical last few weeks... really new to dating and need help!", "post": "I was in a really long-term relationship (12yrs), left him over six months ago. Spent the time since enjoying independence, learning about myself and who I am etc. I'm not ready for another relationship. I like the freedom of being on my own...\n\nA guy has entered my life. I've known of him for years, we've chatted a few times at parties etc, but nothing ever happened. We went away for a week for a work conference thing (we work in the same industry). He asked how things were, and I told him I'm single. We caught up a few times for hours chatting and learning about each other. New years eve (at the conference), we hung out in the same group, and flirted a bit, sitting on each others lap etc. \n\nThe group we hung out with really gelled, so as a group we've gotten together almost every 3-4 days over the last few weeks. Each time, the two of us have flirted in front of them, but little to their knowledge, we've also kissed and I've stayed at his house twice (in two weeks) because it was too late to drive home after the group's social events. Nothing happened beyond kissing and heavy rubbing. \n\nHe's made it obvious he would like to have sex, and I would too, but I feel like I would like to know beforehand what it would mean to him - just a f*** buddy, potential relationship etc. To be honest, I don't know what I want from him anyway, so should I need to ask? Should I go with the flow? I haven't really had a lot of experience with dating, so I'm new to all of this. \n\nWe've tentatively discussed going away for the weekend hiking one weekend. So there's future discussions there, but I know that doesn't mean anything. Friends go hiking! Anyway, I'm not trying to read into his behaviour and work out what it means, I'm purely thinking about myself, and should I ask what he's thinking, if he's seeing anyone else, or should I just go with the flow and see what happens?", "summary": "Should I ask what he's thinking, if he's seeing anyone else, or should I just go with the flow, sleep with him and see what happens?"}
{"id": "t3_24zcb0", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (21/M) think I am falling for my best friend (20/F)", "post": "For several months I have been growing closer and closer with my best friend. She has helped me through some of my hardest times. She recently helped me get through a difficult breakup. When we first met, we kind of \"friend zoned\" each other because I was in another relationship at the time. \n\nThe semester recently ended and she and I have been spending a lot more time together. I find myself caring for her so much and I want to protect her, however I think this is because we are such good friends. But when I am with her, I feel so happy and I just can't help but smile. \n\nLast night, we were talking, just the two of us and as I stood up to leave, she said, \"Wait. I want to try something. And I think we are good enough friends that we can at least try it\". Then, she kissed me! We talked about it after and neither of us felt weird or awkward...it actually felt very good. We kissed again, longer this time, and felt even better. Then I had to leave, so we didn't talk about it anymore after that.\n\nNow I am kind of confused. I got home and I couldn't sleep because all I could do was think about her and that kiss. I don't know if I should pursue it, because I don't want to lose her as a friend. And I don't know what my next steps should be! Thoughts? Advice?", "summary": "My best friend and I kissed and it felt great, not weird at all, and now I don't know what to do next."}
{"id": "t3_1t6mm1", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Need some advice on a money situation", "post": "My wife and I were supposed to take a trip overseas with my parents.  The trip was to India, where my parents are originally from, and my parents wanted to show my wife (who is white) some sights and sounds.\n\nUnfortunately, my mom had a heart attack right before we were planning to leave.  She should recover fully, but we had to postpone the trip.  First and foremost, I'm glad that my mom is ok, and there's no price that you can put on that.  I called our airline to see about rescheduling, and they said that it is not an option at all, given the type of ticket we booked, even for a medical emergency.  So, basically, I am out $4k, which is a LOT of money for me (for anyone, really).  \n\nMy parents' ticket is fully changable for up to a year.  Here's my question.  I don't want to tell my parents about the fact that I can't refund the ticket, because I don't want my mom to feel guilty or anything like that.  I don't want them to stress anymore than they have due to this medical issue.  But I also don't want them to expect that I got a full refund and think that we're going to go to India this year, using the funds from the refund.  I simply can't afford another ticket.  What should I do?", "summary": "Can't get a flight refund for trip postponed due to mom's heart attack, don't want to tell parents so they don't stress and feel guilty about it."}
{"id": "t3_3a1kx8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My estranged mother [61F] owes me [25M] money. How to get it back? Complicated.", "post": "Me and my mother became estranged a year ago after years and years of abuse from her. My older brother [29M] is also estranged from her because of similar issues, although he is low contact rather than no contact. The NC is mutual. She did send me a Christmas card which I ignored. Nothing else from her.\n\nAbout five years ago, my mother needed to borrow money. Around $10000. She borrowed a similar amount from my brother. When we became estranged, she told me I was dead to her and I'd never see that money again. She also had said my brother would not get his money back. She also said that she would throw out any of my stuff in her house. I resigned myself to losing it. A small price to pay for getting rid of her.\n\nRecently, my brother said that she had found some stuff of mine and boxed it up for me to get. Weird. Then a couple days ago, he told me that he'd got his money back, just a check in the post. He said I should expect to get my money back too. I am not sure whether she will contact me to come pick my stuff up. I want my stuff back and I want the money back. Should I approach her to get it back? Should I keep waiting? How should I act when I see her? I really want my stuff back and I have no problem acting different to manipulate that to happen.", "summary": "Estranged mother has stuff and money of mine. She returned my brother's money and has said she will return my stuff. How to go about getting it all back? Should I approach her or wait?"}
{"id": "t3_2beluj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] have a tendency to put pressure on myself/relationships, leading to confidence issues early on. Help please.", "post": "I've dated several people in the last year and it always seems that when it gets to a certain point, I blow it. I've been seeing this girl lately who I've known for a long time, and she recently moved back to our hometown. I feel like I'm probably putting more pressure on myself than I should because we haven't discussed the bf/gf title at all. I don't think that we should have to necessarily have that talk either, but I just feel like there is a certain uncertainty in this phase that freaks me out. \n\nWhen I start to question how she feels or how I feel, my confidence goes to hell and that's when things bottom out. I feel like it's a predictable cycle and I would like some advice on not rushing anything and just being patient as things grow organically. I feel like I'm beginning to do this where I push her away, and I don't want to lose my opportunity with this person as I have in the past.", "summary": "I put pressure on myself/relationship, instead of letting it progress organically. How can I improve to not push someone away?"}
{"id": "t3_iuzph", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is one of the most amazingly hilarious coincidences you have ever witnessed?", "post": "This didn't happen to me but a friend of mine. In high school we had these college age speakers come in from \"City Year\", some sort of anti-discrimination group. We were sitting in the commons during lunch, and my friend, we'll call him Charles, was eating a reindeer sausage he had made. Some sort of conversation was going on that ended with another one of my friends jokingly hitting Charles and running across the room. Charles retaliated by throwing the sausage at him.\n\nThis in itself would not have been a problem except for an amazingly coincidental turn of events. Right as Charles threw the sausage, a Muslim student happened to be walking by. At the same time, one of the City Year anti-discrimination guys was coming from the other direction. From where the City Year guy was standing, he had apparently just seen my friend throw pork at a Muslim. A quite amazing shitstorm ensued. Charles couldn't get a word in edge-wise to plead his case as the City Year guy bitched him out for a full 10 minutes.", "summary": "Friend through a reindeer sausage, a Muslim walked by, anti-descrimination guy thought he was throwing pork at a Muslim."}
{"id": "t3_4pluje", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21f) started having feelings for my best guy friend (22m) but now there's a problem", "post": "I'm on mobile so forgive me if there's typos/formatting errors. \n\nI have been best friends with this guy for about a year and a half now. We spend almost every day together and if we aren't hanging out we for sure talk everyday and tell each other everything. I started catching feelings a few months ago but I haven't done anything about it because I know for a fact he's not into me. Which alright, fine, I should just drop it and move on, and I've been trying to without losing our friendship. So far it's been okay. \n\nRecently he's been a bit more distant and a little shady. He'd lie to me about who he was texting/hanging out with and talk to me less and less. Turns out he has been hanging out with this girl who I have a bad past with (my ex boyfriend cheated on me with her). I'm pretty sure my best friend has a crush on her and is trying to get at her, and I know it's none of my business but it really bugs the hell out of me, especially since this chick hurt me in the past and now she's hanging out with him. I mean it would probably bug me a tiny bit if he was seeing anyone, but the fact that it's her is kind of like a slap to the face. Is there anything I should do? It bugs me but I don't want to lose his friendship.", "summary": "guy best friend (who I have a small crush on) is hanging out with chick who hooked up with my ex, he's been acting shady, sucks but don't want to lose friendship. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_163ezd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How to get over a girl who I see every day", "post": "So I am living with 3 girl roommates and in the summer me and their best friend had sex and hooked up a bunch. I loved her but she did not feel the same way back. I kind of ended our friendship because it was not fair to me. The problem is that they are her best friends and she comes over all the time and I dont want to stop her from seeing her best friends but I hate seeing her. It makes me miss her so much and I want to be with her so bad and I know I need to get over her for good. Also me and her are ont he same sports team in university and we see each to her everyday at practice so there is no getting away from her. How do I get over someone who I see everyday and have to be around at practice and even at my home. I need help because I do not want to feel this way anymore. help  am miserable", "summary": "slept with roommates best friend and it did not work out, see her everyday , how do i get over it."}
{"id": "t3_3jkcsb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (23M) neighbor (33M) has been borrowing lawn equipment over the course of a year. Now my mother wants me to tell him to pay me. We're great friends. How do I talk to him?", "post": "My neighbor and I have established an awesome relationship since summer (around July) of 2014.  He's a great guy, a great father, and we have a lot in common, including lawn care.  Being the guy that I am, if he has asked for help with his lawn, I've always given it, including borrowing the lawn mower, weed eater, and edger.  He often pays for gas for equipment, repairs is if something is wrong or off, and always makes sure that both lawns (mine and my mother's) to great effect.  But my mother feels like he is taking too much of an advantage of her and her equipment, and even me.  She believes that he should pay me for the work I do with him, considering the cost of using the equipment, wear and tear, gas, time, etc.\n\nI'm not sure how to tell him that, and I'm scared that if I do it wrong, I'm going to lose a great friend, and an even better neighbor.  Can anyone offer me some advice?", "summary": "Good neighbor and friend has been borrowing lawn equipment.  Mom wants pay for it.  What can I do without shattering our relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_4jv0c1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [26M] been trying to win my ex-girlfriend [23F] (we dated for a year) back for quite some time. Am I going too far with it?", "post": "First, I'll explain what my ex-girlfriend looks like. She has gorgeous golden hair that she curls each day. She has legs for miles, the brightest green eyes I've ever seen, a tiny little nose, and a whole galaxy of freckles. \n\nShe broke up with me a while back because her family didn't get along with mine (her mother, who I met and who liked me a lot, died of breast cancer, leaving her strict, douchey military father behind). Valid. I told her I would make it a game to win her back, and she told me I could go ahead and try.\n\nIt has become a little game of ours. It started out small: texting her daily, bringing desserts to her house, serenading her, etc. Then it escalated. I showed up to her house on horseback (my uncle owns a farm) and we rode around the countryside. I surprised her with some decently-sized fireworks, which are legal in my state. Her response to the fireworks was, \"you're getting there.\"\n\nI still have NO idea if she has any genuine intention of getting back with me, or if she's just having fun at my expense. She never kisses me on these dates, but she never rebuffs me either. I know she has been talking to another guy because I'm seen him around, but they seem completely platonic and non-romantic. I'm so confused.\n\nTomorrow, I'm going to surprise her. When her mom died, she got a minuscule infinity tattoo on her ankle. I went out and got the same tattoo, but now I'm thinking...does this sound creepy to you guys? Is this whole scenario \"normal?\"", "summary": "My ex and I have had an ongoing game where I try to win her back. How far should I go? Is my next move too far? Should I even bother with this?"}
{"id": "t3_3465sy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23/F] foreign GF has told me [25/M] she doesn't want to get committed because she leaves the country in 1 year.", "post": "Hi, looking for advice on how to deal with the situation.\n\nMy GF [23/F] and I [25/M] met online over Christmas and started dating at the very beginning of the year, so 5ish months now. We both knew that the relationship might not last forever because she is a foreign student and when she finishes studying she wants to travel. Until yesterday we hadn't spoken about what that meant for the relationship but we had often discussed her future plans. \n\nShe is a very sunny and loving person so when I couldn't get two words out of her yesterday I knew something was up. It took her about 5 hours to work up to telling me that she didn't want to get 'attached' because she would be leaving in a year. But that she still wanted to keep seeing me without the title BF & GF. \n\nI explained that I couldn't do that, or at least I don't think I can. I'm already attached and not humanly in control enough of my emotions to not get more attached as time passes. So whatever happens I feel like I lose, either we break up (which neither of us want) and deny ourselves present happiness to save future pain or we keep going and I have to constantly monitor my affections. \n\nPerhaps she is only bringing this up because she is getting attached and that scary her because of our possibly difficult future\n\nWe haven't reached a decision yet but I don't know what to do. Is there a third option? Am I wrong? Is she wrong?", "summary": "My GF [23/F] and I [25/M] of 5 months aren't sure what the next step of our otherwise happy relationship should be, because she is leaving the country in a 1 year."}
{"id": "t3_3nvkvw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Posted about me [20M] being in love with my best friend [19F] about eight months ago on reddit...", "post": "Previous post:  \n\nI ended up telling her I was in love with her.  I literally opened my mouth five times over a span of an hour to say it, but I couldn't.  Nothing would come out.  She had no idea it was coming and was totally caught off guard.  Of course after I left, I got on the bus an hour later and she was right there -______-.  Anyways, it was awkward for about 2-3 weeks.\n\nWe started to get back to normal at about the start of March, and on St. Patrick's day, with both of us very wasted, she tried to fuck me.  I somehow stopped her (I was nearly blackout but I sobered up for this) and lots of making out/cuddling happened for the next month.  No sex, though.  She was worried it would ruin our friendship.  \n\nThen mid-April we went out to a party and both blacked.  I came to while I was mid-fuck with her, but at that point I decided to just go with it cuz the deed was done.  After about 2 weeks of sneaking around and fucking, she very awkwardly asked to date me while I was mid-stroke inside of her.  We talked and now we have been dating for five months strong.  \n\nThanks reddit :)!\n\nSpecial thanks to Fubar904; his advice helped me the most.", "summary": "Fell in love with my best friend about 8-9 months ago, finally told her I had feelings, after three complicated months, stuff got on a roll and now we have five months strong.  Thanks reddit :)."}
{"id": "t3_bzl39", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit I went to the shrink today and he said...", "post": "(THROWAWAY)\n\nHe can't help me, because there is nothing pyschiatrically wrong with me.... But I have a problem I am a quitter, I also give up. Every job I ever had I just quit after awhile I'm not unhappy or don't enjoy it, some day I just wakeup and don't feel like going anymore.\nI had a 3.5 gpa and quit university with 6 courses left. I'm 23 and now I feel like my easy riding won't work anymore and I am getting nervous as all my friends begin to succeed, I am a smart guy and so capable but I just seem to punish myself for no good reason.\n\nI'm usually so happy, but the realization that Im fucking up is starting to worry me. Im trying to do better but I still make poor decisions about holding a job. I have had ADD my whole life and feel this contributes somewhat but the shrink said that im just not motivated and my life has been to easy for me to hit rockbottom and get motivated. But I don't want to hit rock bottom, I wanna turn it around and stop quitting before I get there...\nBut I can't seem to wrap my head around it... Im sure many people have similar problems but have gotten by, what Im asking is for techniques or excersizes that might help me hold my focus and push through those days when I just wanna say \"meh\" and not go work.", "summary": "I always quit even though I am well positioned in life, how can i train myself to stick with it for the long haul and stop sabotaging myself?"}
{"id": "t3_37azs2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I (f26) let my visiting in-laws (60s) know that I need my space at home without being rude?", "post": "My father-in-law is staying with me and my husband for two weeks. We have a very small apartment, one bedroom, a tiny bathroom and kitchen. I love my father-in-law, and he's very kind and generous, but staying in such close quarters with anyone except my husband or best friend is trying. He has these tiny habits, like humming the same short melody over and over again, that drive me up the wall.\n\nIn the mornings, I have to have my alone time. My fil gets up early, blasts the radio and asks me all kinds of questions on everything from food to politics as I'm trying to wake up over my breakfast at 7 am. \n\nI know I'm at fault for being easily stressed and needing a lot of alone time, but is there any POLITE, NICE way of saying I need to eat breakfast alone or that I need to go spend time alone in our bedroom in the evening? Thanks guys.", "summary": "I'm easily stressed and irritable, my father-in-law is staying for two weeks in our tiny apartment, I need advice on how to attain alone-time while at home."}
{"id": "t3_dd6gg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Question about 'fuck-buddies'..", "post": "Hi reddit,\nobviously a throwaway, I don't want to have this linked to my normal account.\n\nI know this girl, she lives rather far away and will be coming to visit me in about a month. I would consider her as a fuckbuddy, since that's what we'll be doing.\n\nI'm socially retarded and this is actually the first time I will be having sex for 2 years. She on the other hand is a really beautiful girl and could have a different guy every day (she doesn't). So, of course she also has other guys flirting with her etc. So, yesterday she told me that she's planning a threesome with two other guys. I then told her quite clearly that I don't exactly want these infos, since I still have to wait 4 weeks. Just to clarify, I can't imagine a relationship with her, of course I like her, but she isn't the person for anything serious (neither am I). But isn't it normal that I don't really wanna know who she's fucking?", "summary": "Fuckbuddy tells me about having sex with some other guys, is it normal that I don't really want to hear this stuff?"}
{"id": "t3_1okitx", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Am I overlooking this situation?(23/m) (21/f)", "post": "A little background: About 4 months ago I broke up with my ex of 3 years and started using OKC to find a girl who I could just meet to talk to and get my mind off the last 3 wasted years. \n\nSo here is the situation, I met a girl about 3 weeks ago through OKC. And I honestly think I have completely fallen for her. She is literally my perfect match, and honestly I have never felt this way ever before over a girl. \n\nWe went out on 2 dates (which went extremely well) and the 3rd was supposed to happen last Wednesday but she had a migraine. But this migraine has persisted and I haven't spoke to her since Sunday night. Before I was dating my ex, a couple of girls I was meeting used similar \"I am sick\" excuses and never talked to me again. I don't want this to be true with this girl, but is it a possibility? \n\nI texted her this morning to see how she was feeling and to see if she would want to go out tonight, but I shouldn't expect a reply until 12-2pm est. \n\nSorry for any formatting errors, I am on my phone.", "summary": "Met amazing girl who has canceled last date due to a migraine, but have had girls in the past cut ties with me claiming to be \"sick\" before a date. Is she doing the same?"}
{"id": "t3_jmtxv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can Reddit help me choose a health care plan for my family? (healthcare newb)", "post": "I'm 20, this is new to me. My parents no longer work for the employer that provided the healthcare we had. My parents are more or less self employed, the healthcare was a perk for exclusively working with said employer. I'm now tasked with finding a health care plan for my family since my family trusts me with the decision (in other words, we don't have a fucking clue, but I'm the one going to college so I have to do it). \n\nInfo on my family: \n5 members . Mom & Pop both 40 yro. 20, 14, 5 yro boys.\n5 yro has asthma.\n20 yro has glasses (14 might need em)\nOther than that there are no other health problems. We really only need checkups (preventive medicine is the best!)\nSo how do I go about this?", "summary": "Lost healthcare. Need new one. Can reddit help? Did someone already answer this? (Sorry if that was the case)Maybe a page on healthcare providers pros/cons plan options etc. What's your plan?"}
{"id": "t3_2jcgwj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] met an amazing person [32 F] two weeks ago, don't know how to proceed", "post": "Some background about me: I've never started a relationship locally as I've dated online my whole life so I'm a bit lost on how to proceed. I've been out of a 4 year relationship for a month and a half and ready to move on, but I feel as if I'm obsessing over this new girl. I don't want to ruin a great friendship by asking her on a date, but I already feel like I'm extremely interested in her. \n\nI met girl [Amanda for throwaway] two weeks ago and we've hung out a few times now. We've also been non-stop texting until two days ago (I accidentally got over-stressed due to other matters and let on about it). We've gone on a few \"hangouts\", not official dates. Truth be told, I can't tell if she's interested in me or is just super friendly. \n\nFirst r/relationship post, sorry for mistakes", "summary": "Want to ask friend of 2 weeks on a date, but not sure if she's interested and don't want to ruin a friendship. "}
{"id": "t3_1nxqnz", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Don't tailgate me", "post": "Background: There is a road in my area where the speed limit drops from 50 to 35 as the road goes from 4 lanes to 2 as it goes through a residential area. This road is kind of a by-pass for a crowded section of Highway 9 (think of Bruce Springstein) in central NJ and also crosses a major east/west state highway so the local police hang out on that road to get speeders who don't bother to slow down. Locals are aware the police are usually there, somewhere on the road, and keep an eye on the speed limit.\n\nSo, one day, I am driving on that road to pick up my son from his karate class and notice the police car hanging out in a parking lot for a park about a half mile from where the speed limit decreases, hidden from the road (I usually look to see if a car is there or not). About 15 minutes later I am coming back with my son and slow down as the speed limit drops to 35. Of course some BENNY from NY (think of the cast of Jersey Shore) starts tailgating me and flashes his lights to go faster and gets increasingly frustrated as I refused to go faster. And then I remember the police officer and wondered if he was still in the park. Well, one way to find out.\n\nJust before the park, the road widens slightly to allow space for a left turn lane into the park. Just before we get to the park entrance I move my car ever so slightly onto the shoulder making the temptation too great for the BENNY. He seizes this opening to fly by me through the left turn lane. As I pass the park I notice that not only is my friend still there but his lights just popped on. He comes out of the park, I pull over like a driver is supposed to when an emergency vehicle has his lights on and watch him quickly close the distance between him and the BENNY.", "summary": "I clicked my oil releasing switch and caused a tailgater to spin out and get thrown from his car as he crashed into some trees."}
{"id": "t3_4uj53c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [37m] and my [28f] fiancee wants to leave. Together 6yrs. Need advice", "post": "Ok so a bit of back story, my fiancee have been together 6 years.  We have one 3 year old daughter together. We have had serious problems the last year.  I found out she cheated on me with a coworker (March 2015). I've never been unfaithful to her,  but I'm not perfect by any means. I don't believe I was being a good partner to her.. Not that it's any excuse to cheat. \n\nThe problem is we never went to counseling or anything, never really talked about it other than maybe that first week after I found out about it. She has a lot of depression and anxiety issues. We Co parent great,  our sex life is good,  we don't argue really. She just shuts down sometimes and gives up so  to speak.\n\n Two days ago she tells me she just can't do it anymore. She feels hopeless etc. She is a stay at home mom now and money is tight for us with one income which has also caused issues. She says she loves me with all her heart but isn't in love like she was. \n\nAnd I know this all sounds like she's cheating again but I honestly don't think so. Should I let her leave,  try to get to counseling? Just don't know what to do. Sorry for the long rambling post.", "summary": "[28f] fiancee wants to leave me. 6yrs together. Says she doesn't feel in love anymore. Anyway to salvage relationship or just let her go?"}
{"id": "t3_ztt31", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (M21) need advice on how to get my girl(/woman)friend (F35) to understand that I don't hide things from her, I just communicate differently.", "post": "As the title says I'm 21yo male in a 9 month relationship with a 35yo female.\n\nShe has been very upset recently with me recently (to the point of saying she no longer wants to be in a relationship) because I was on the phone with her and texting another person at the same time. Her rationale is not that I was talking to the person whilst texting her (even though I think that is a big issue to her) but that I should have told her that I was texting the person instead of finding out from the person the next day.\n\nShe has always said that she hates hearing things about me from other people. I.e. when someone has told her something about me that I have told them that she did not know.\n\nI've always told her that I don't hide things from her: I'm just the kind of person who isn't very talkative and doesn't always volunteer information and tends to mention something if the topic comes up in a conversation,however if I am asked something I will readily and willingly answer. I have however tried to be more open with her.\n\nI don't want to lose her. \nHow do I phrase a good apology for not informing her about something I knew she would have wanted to know but absentmindedly didn't mention?\nHow do I explain my communication style in a manner that will get her to understand?\n\np.s. I have schizoid personality disorder (SPD), I think that is a contributory factor to how I communicate.", "summary": "I dont volunteer info as much as my gf would like. How do I apologise and make her see that I mean nothing by it?"}
{"id": "t3_2dr1e5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17/M] have been with my girlfriend [17/F] for about 4 months and I need advice on how not to be overprotective.", "post": "This won't be too long of a post but it is a severe problem in the least. My girlfriend and I have a very loving relationship and we have dedicated ourselves to each other. I have a tendency of being very protective. I have trouble when she is out with her friends or doing stuff when I am not around. I have told her about this and she thinks it's fine and a tad cute as long as I don't act upon it. I haven't acted upon these feelings but every time I hear she is doing something and we are not together I get this very primal instinct that I need to protect her and be with her at every moment and I want it to stop. I don't want to suffocate our relationship by being too overprotective. Is there anyway that I can stop myself from feeling too overprotective so I can be happy when she is not around me and around me equally?", "summary": "Although I never act upon it I feel super protective of my girlfriend whenever she isn't around. How do I fix it?"}
{"id": "t3_2el082", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think I [19M] may be acting somewhat possessively about my not-quite girlfriend [19F] due to insecurity related to her feelings for me; seeking advice on how to stop these reactions and be a better partner.", "post": "**Background**: When I met this girl (at college) she had a long-distance, long-term boyfriend with whom she was in an open relationship. We started hooking up exclusively but had many ups and downs due to her not wanting to jeopardize her feelings for her boyfriend. *Her interactions with me and her boyfriend are not the topic of discussion for today.* They broke up this summer and after a long period spent getting over some associated guilt and hurt feelings, she and I agreed that we would try to be together this fall.\n\n**Issue at hand:** She feels that I hold a grudge against every person she's ever hooked up with other than me. This argument popped up because I brought up a one night stand she had this summer after her break up with her ex, me kind of overstating my jealousy of this hookup because I had \"existed\" at that point. I told her I disliked the idea of her kissing him or looking at him in the ways that we shared. It was all a little overstated maybe. She's a little upset over my reaction and I agree that what I said was possessive. \n\n**What I think**: I think that a lot of it may stem from insecurity about her feelings for me, given how we started off (just hooking up while she was in an open relationship), but I am afraid that I am possessive and that this will continue to be an issue for me in this relationship or future ones if I cannot correct it now and would like to hear your thoughts on possessiveness / how I can better avoid this.", "summary": "I'm being a little possessive and would like to fix that for this (and future) relationships. I think it may stem from insecurity over her feelings for me."}
{"id": "t3_3bsezj", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU badly", "post": "Before the end of school year me and my english teacher made a deal, that she will give me higher mark, if I write 3 short essays. I wrote her an e-mail that i'm working and it may take a while. Well I log in my e-mail and see this: It is really sad that you have tricked me. She sent this 2 weeks ago. I had written the essays, but due to the laziness did not send, because they needed some corrections. Now I feel like a complete ass and don't know what to do. Don't be stupid - do your fucking job.", "summary": "made a deal with teacher. Didn't do what I was suppose to do. Got an e-mail from her. Feel sad."}
{"id": "t3_vu2j7", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Dating a guy who was originally very attentive, then I get blown off. Why? What should I do?", "post": "Hi r/dating_advice,\n\nI apologize if this has come up before, but after some googling I couldn't find any good advice for my situation. I met this guy online and I've been dating him for about 3 weeks. We are casually dating, and I initially didn't want anything serious, but the more I spend time with him the more I like him. Originally, he wanted to set up dates with me no more than 1 or 2 days after we last saw each other and he was very good about texting and sending messages about when he was living from his city (we live about 20 minutes away) and when he would get to my city. \n\nThen this week on Wednesday, he suggests we hang out on Friday. I was invited to happy hour with some friends already, and so I ask if he'd like to join. He says yes. I text him the next day telling him when and where we are meeting, and just to let me know when he gets off work. I get **no reply**. This was the first warning sign. So I arrive at the place for happy hour with my friends and then I finally text him an hour into it to tell him where we are. \n\nHe FINALLY texts me back an hour later saying that he has too much work and can't meet up. I was very annoyed and hurt because I felt like we were really hitting it off, and he didn't seem like the type of guy who would just blow someone off. He also texts \"would I like to meet tomorrow?\" I say that I am actually busy. The good thing is(1 hour later), he does apologize and acknowledge that he should have texted me earlier. I tell him that yes he should have, and that I am busy, but I will be free starting Sunday night. So far no reply.\n\nI don't really no what to think or what to do. Any insight?", "summary": "Guy I'm dating acts very interested in me than cancels a date 2 hours later. Why and what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_503198", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A friend (21F) of mine (21M) is coming to town and asked to stay the night at my place? I had a massive crush on her a year ago.", "post": "We're both current university students - she's working for the upcoming term and as a result has her apartment rented out. We're really close, so she reached out to me and asked if she could stay over at my place tomorrow night, due to the fact she has an exam the following day. We first started talking a couple years ago because I had a massive crush on her. \n\nI'm sure I'm overthinking everything here, because to my knowledge she's never had a crush on me. We've joked that if we're both still single by our late 20's we'd start dating. I definitely still have some romantic feelings for her, and wouldn't be opposed to something *more* happening tomorrow. \n\nAs of this moment, I'm going to pick her up tomorrow night from the bus stop, she's going out for a drink with some old friends then she's going to come back and we're going to watch Game of Thrones together. The TV is in my room and the only real sitting space is my bed.... which I also said she could have for the night.\n\nI guess my predicament is should I make a move? I think I want to but I don't know what kind of reaction to expect...", "summary": "Really close friend is coming to stay at my place for the night, I had a crush on her in the past and am considering making a move but I'm not sure if I should..."}
{"id": "t3_1anc25", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm having a lot of trouble concentrating, your thoughts?", "post": "Okay, so when I was younger I used to stay up literally all night reading. My step dad would come in and check on me when he noticed the light still on, and I'd ask him if I could read for just ten more minutes, thinking he was going to yell at me for being up so late. He never did, because he thought it was the greatest thing ever. It would take me MAYBE a week to read a book. That lasted from as far back as I can remember until a few years ago. For some reason, every time I try to sit down and seriously read or even watch a movie, I can't do it. I read the same thing over and over, or I space out and five minutes later have no idea what's going on in the storyline. I also tend to just fall asleep. I can't even pick a movie to watch on netflix, because I know I won't be able to pay attention like I want to or that I'll fall asleep within ten minutes. This isn't necessarily affecting my every day life except for that I don't read as much or watch as many movies as I used to. I really would like to be able to read a book cover to cover in just a few days(rather than finishing months later, if at all). What's wrong with me and how do I fix it?! Thanks reddit!", "summary": "I can't even read a book without getting distracted or falling asleep, why is this and how can I fix it?"}
{"id": "t3_2i7rf9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M/23] and overwhelmed with sexual desire for my sister-in-law [F/21]", "post": "I [M/23] have been married for a little over a year and a half. I absolutely love my wife [F/25] and we are very happy together. We have a great sex life. I have no desire to cheat on her and I truly think that she is absolutely gorgeous, inside and out. \n\nThe problem is that whenever I am around her younger sister I am completely overwhelmed with sexual desire for her. It is literally all I can think about. I spend the entire time we are near each other imagining her naked and what it would be like to have sex with her. \n\nFortunately, we live 700 miles apart and I am only around her 2-3 times/year. However, my quality time with my wife's family and my desire for my wife are seriously hindered by this uncontrollable sexual desire for my sister-in-law during family trips, etc.", "summary": "I love my wife and we have a solid relationship, but whenever I am near her younger sister I am overcome with sexual desire for her. What do I do? Who do I tell/not tell? Advise Please!"}
{"id": "t3_18lm7t", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Should I [17M] try for a relationship with this girl (17F)?", "post": "We're both in grade 12. I've known her for ~5 months now, crushing for 3, and have been really close to her for 2. I've never been in a relationship before while she's had a slew of relationships (4) that've all ended badly, leaving her emotionally unstable with trust issues. I pursued her, got friendzoned, but decided to be her friend and gained her trust. We formed a relationship of complete honesty and openness, and she was able to open up to me. We grew to be really close friends and were very comfortable with each other, me focusing on trying to get over her. Then, she told me last week that she had a crush on me!\n\nThe problem? She recognizes that she is emotionally unstable & in a transitional state, and doesn't think we'd see each other much post-high-school. She doesn't want to enter a relationship because she doesn't think it would be feasible with her being emotionally unstable. Apart from that, I love spending time with her and we have very similar desires for what we want in a relationship. The honesty aspect of my relationship with her is also just awesome. (Also, I asked her to prom!)\n\nMy question is this: *What are the dangers of being in a relationship with a mentally fragile person, and (how) should I convince her to enter such a relationship?*\n\nI know that I definitely have no problem with supporting her and bearing her burden emotionally. Firstly, I do that for her regardless of my relationship status with her. Secondly, I actually find people and talk to them about things like this actively, trying to help people with similar issues. So I certainly will have no problems in that department.", "summary": "Pursued girl, friendzoned, broke out, but she's emotionally unstable. What are the risks of being in a relationship with her?***"}
{"id": "t3_327n3o", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How should I [18M] escalate things with this girl [18F] in my university club", "post": "So we are both in a club at my university and so hopefully I'll be seeing a lot of her as time goes on. The delema I am facing is how to take things from just being friends to a more romantic/dating relationship. I haven't talked to her a lot but that's mostly due to my shy nature (I get more comfortable with people as time goes on). I'm almost 19 and I haven't had a girlfriend since I was 15, and even then it wasn't anything serious (was a lame month kind of thing). How do I approach getting a girlfriend since I haven't really done it and I have no idea where to go from here.", "summary": "I'm crushing on this girl but I don't know how to get a girlfriend, don't want to just be friends."}
{"id": "t3_178z69", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Going on a third date with a shy guy... should I take the lead or be patient and wait for him to make a move?", "post": "*", "summary": "Want to kiss a shy guy on our third date, but not sure whether I should initiate or wait for him to do so. Thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_3f9490", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Unsure about my (21M) friend's (21F) intentions inviting me to an amusement park this weekend", "post": "Not even sure if this is the best place to post this but here goes:\n\nAbout 3 days ago I got invited by my friend and classmate (let's call her Katie) to spend this Saturday at an amusement park a few towns (let's call it town A) over, and also to maybe watch some movies. The company (X) she interns at is also located in town A and gives them cheap tickets to the amusement park and movies. I said sure, and asked her if I could invite some friends. She said yes so I did but everyone I invited couldn't go due to prior obligations.\n\nSome background: a lot of my classmates are interning for company X, so I assumed it would be a group get together party type of deal for classmates. Katie and I are good friends, we've had some heart-to-heart but I don't want any kind of relationship with her, nor do I find her really *that* attractive. \n\nAbout an hour ago I get a call from Katie saying every other one of my classmates in town A has peaced or has other plans for the weekend. She's a little buzzed but we talked and she made plans for a party Friday night, then amusement park and movies the next day. I didn't want to sound mean over the phone but hearing everyone else has basically peaced makes me wonder if she has ulterior motives for inviting me over (to a party on Friday night, of all things). She even admitted that it'd be basically me and her for all of Friday night and Saturday, and overall sounded super eager to see me. \n\nShould I even go at all? Basically if she makes any sort of move I'll have to turn her down. Then it'd be hella fucking awkward for the rest of the time together. I could always jet because I have my own car but that'd be REALLY shitty and hurtful of me. If there's the potential, I'd like to avoid this situation altogether. It is really easy to come up with some last minute excuse why I can't drive 2 hours over to town A.", "summary": "Female friend who I'm not attracted to invites me a ways over for movies and an amusement park, was supposed to be a group thing but now it's just me and her. Need to decide whether to go through or bail. "}
{"id": "t3_2vbdqk", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU: by not learning from others", "post": "So I'm going to keep this post short and to the point. I've ALWAYS wondered how the fuck people could shit their pants in public. Like wtf, can you really not control your asshole? I've even always thought of myself as someone with pretty great ass-control (asstrol) so this was never a legitimate concern for me. I thought it was solely reserved for dinguses and people with horrible asstrol. Well today I figured it out, folks; literally 30 minutes ago. Sometimes it feels like a fart, and by the time your ass opens up for it, liquid shit runs out. Worst experience 10/10 would not recommend.", "summary": "I shit my pants and now believe that it truly can happen to anyone. Even someone with pretty solid butt-control."}
{"id": "t3_1xtohv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "22F doesn't know what is happening with 23M", "post": "Hello. I am a 22F and lately I have been going out with 23M weekly. We texted every day, planned outing to the zoo etc, picks me up for supper/ random movie outing etc. He even has a polaroid of us at the back of his phone and his friends tease us a lot. He bought me a Kiel James Patrick bracelet that I have been eyeing for a few months and even got himself the exact one too. \n\nHowever, he left for Australia to study for 1.5 years last week and even though we still text, I don't know if there is anything going on between us. He has never been in a relationship before and I just don't know what is going on... I don't know how to hint to him that I like him because I don't know if he likes me too. What should I do?", "summary": "I don't know what direction are we headed for, and I don't know how to ~hint~ to him that I like him because I'm not sure if he might feel the same."}
{"id": "t3_1q6cc4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is a story that someone told that makes you look bad but you have a completely legitimate side to the story that shows the situation in a better light?", "post": "My current roommate (college) and I have been good friends and living together for a year and a half after being randomly assigned to live together. However, she came into the situation of living with me expecting me to be some terrible person with no regards to others feelings, when in fact I'm very compassionate. Apparently my boyfriends ex-girlfriend and my roommate were friends and the ex-gf said that I was a home wrecking bitch due to the fact that we had been friends and I started dating her ex. In retrospect, after I broke up with my ex she always invited him over to hang out with us even though I told her it made me uncomfortable and I really didn't want him to hang out with us because he was obviously not over me. When I started dating my boyfriend I made sure that her and him never saw eachother because neither liked the other. She then told me we could no longer be friends because knowing that I was with him basically tainted her view of me and it made her violently ill to even look at me...", "summary": "Dating the love of my life, derp, his ex is crazy, tried to get my current roommate to hate me unsuccessfully."}
{"id": "t3_1iv5x1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [23F] seeing a guy [39M] and I don't know what is going on", "post": "I've been seeing a guy for about five weeks now, and I have no idea what's going on.\n\nWe met through a mutual friend, and he asked me out about an hour after I broke up with the last guy I was seeing (we were out with a group, he asked me how things were going with the bf, I said I was going to break up with him in the next few minutes, guy fb messages me a little while later to ask if I wanna grab drinks a few days later).\n\nWe have a great first date: a few drinks and lots of talking followed by a movie at his place and making out.\n\nA few days later, I ask him if he wants to do something the following Saturday, and he says, \"Oh, uh, I'll let you know,\" and he did actually let me know that he was busy that weekend.\n\nA week after that, we out with friends, and he invites me back to his place for sexy-times (which was amazing, btw).\n\nTwo days later, he invites me over again, and I tell him that I'm not okay being just a hookup. He says we should just be friends.\n\nThe following Monday, I decide that I'll be a great friend in a short, tight dress. Sexy-times ensue.\n\nTwo days later, he invites me out on something I think was a date. He paid, so I'm gonna assume it was.\n\nNext Monday's friend-outing leads to sex again.\n\nLast Thursday, we go to a group event, and he invites me over afterwards. I tell him I'm instigating a 1:2 ratio of dates:sex, so I won't go home with him.\n\nFinally, tonight, I was supposed to see him at a thing with friends, but my car was acting up. I told him that, hoping that he would volunteer to give me a ride; he did not, just said sorry about my car.\n\nI really like this guy, but it seems like mixed signals all over the place.", "summary": "Is this guy just stringing me along for sex, or am I just too impatient to let things play out the way they're supposed to?"}
{"id": "t3_lj6rx", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Ran a 12.3 mile half marathon. I feel cheated. Ever happened to anyone else?", "post": "So I've only been running since about May or so. Lost 60 lbs in the process and worked my way up to be able to do the Leavenworth Oktoberfest half Mary this past Saturday. \n\nPerfect weather, sunny, a little chilly to start. I felt great and had what I considered a fairly lofty goal of 1:45 (8 minute mile x 13.1)\n\nSpent the miles chasing this older lady who didn't look like she should've been able to run as fast as she did. Passed her towards the end in a full on sprint to the finish. I felt awesome! Looked at my time and saw 1:37.\n\nMan it felt nice. But I found out a couple days later that someone working the route didn't know what they were doing and didn't direct runners down a little .8 mile dog leg. So I (and apparently a LOT of other people) only ran 12.3! Man I'm bummed. I would've gladly given up making it under my goal time in exchange for actually having run the full course! At least I have my plans for this weekend... I'm running a full 13.1 so I can finally say truthfully that I did it and get over the feeling of being cheated. \n\nEver have something like this happen on other courses? I think some of the full marathon runners missed it too. How would this affect their BQs? So far no answer from the people who ran the show.", "summary": "Missed .8 miles of my half marathon last weekend and feel like my accomplishment was snatched away from me when I found out days later."}
{"id": "t3_3h8280", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Econ grad here. What am I doing wrong?", "post": "So I graduated in may 2014 in the DC area but couldn't start applying to jobs till April of this year due to family circumstances. So far I've applied to nearly 50+ places, 4 recruiters contacted me and added me to their available candidates list after a small interview (one of them got me a small office assignment but that's over) and gotten two interviews by myself (none of which panned out). I have experience in office software and am pretty well versed in excel (i'd say a little less than advanced but a lot more than proficient) and advanced mathematics. I have a GPA higher than 3 but lower than 3.5 which I don't mention in my resume. Could that be it? \n\nI don't understand what I'm doing wrong. So far I've been applying to anything remotely related with data, analysis, finance at entry level but I barely get any response. Data entry and admin assistant positions are no different. I also write cover letters for almost every place. I also don't know many people here since my family isn't really well connected enough for me to have great networking opportunities. I really don't know what to do next. I can't imagine how people applying to over 200-400 places deal with the frustrating and emotionally draining experience. I would really appreciate some advice from recent econ/finance grads or hiring personnel.", "summary": "2014 grad, above 3 gpa, high office and maths skills and cant get any responses let alone interviews. Need advice."}
{"id": "t3_2k60r6", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Emotionally and morally freaking out about potentially having to accompany my friend to get an abortion", "post": "Tomorrow, my friend is going to take a pregnancy test. We're both 20 and in college. In my opinion, I believe she might be pregnant. No matter how often I try to educate her, this isn't the first pregnancy scare she's had. This time, however, she forgot to take Plan B, and it's been over a week since she missed her period. We calculated she had unprotected sex twice right when she was ovulating.\n\nI am the only person she confided in about this. I keep telling that I'm here for her, and that we'll figure it out together, and she doesn't have to face this alone. However, I'm internally freaking out. My inner religious upbringing is coming out. The closer this day, the more I'm like \"What is God going to think of me if I accompany this girl to planned parenthood to get an abortion?\"\n\nNow, since coming to college a year ago, I was finally in a safe place where I could admit to myself I was a lesbian, and not freak out about it and try to beat it out of me with religion. So I've been working on trying to figure out my own beliefs about things, and not just what my family thinks.\n\nNow I really don't need any \"God doesn't exist\" type responses because these are my beliefs, and it's actually getting to me. I want to be supportive to my friend, since she decided she could confide in me out of our entire group of friends to help her through this difficult time. \n\nHowever, in supporting her, I don't know how to figure out how to deal with how guilty I feel. I know scientifically, it's not an actual being. This was just so sudden, I haven't had a chance to reflect on what I believe, and how I feel.", "summary": "I'm feeling guilty about being supportive for my friend who could potentially have to get an abortion because of my religious upbringing. What the hell do I do now?!"}
{"id": "t3_3figry", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (20F) don't know if I'm just being crazy or if I have a right to be upset.", "post": "I've been dating my girlfriend for about 5 months now, but we were friends for about 2 years beforehand. We have a mutual friend (who I can't really call my friend anymore, let's call her K) and when my girlfriend hangs out with her, I genuinely get upset.\n\nIn the past, she has tried to stop other people who were her friends from dating because it upset her. I feel like she might be trying to do that with me and my girlfriend.\n\nWhenever my girlfriend hangs out with K, it's this huge thing where I feel like I can't even go into the same room as them. My girlfriend won't answer my texts because K says that it's her time. \n\nThe main reason why I'm upset is because K bad mouthed me in front of someone who used to have a crush on my girlfriend. That girl then proceeded to set me aside at a party and have a full blown conversation with me for over 30 minutes that I really didn't want to be a part of. Whenever my girlfriend hangs out with K, it feels like a little stab in the back. Like she doesn't care that K trash talked me to someone. Who knows that other shit K has said about me to other people, or even to my own girlfriend?\n\nI don't know what to do. Everyone coddles K because she'll just start crying or bitch and moan about how everyone is being mean to her, but why doesn't anyone care about the way I feel? One of these occurrences happened last night, where my girlfriend and I were supposed to Facetime because I'm at home for a couple of weeks, but she couldn't because K just took up all of her time.My girlfriend keeps asking me if I'm mad, and I'm not. I'm upset and hurt, and I don't know how to talk to her, or if I should.", "summary": "I get upset when my girlfriend hangs out with a girl named K, who has talked badly about me to other people and tried to sabotage other people's relationship."}
{"id": "t3_185i22", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What are some good iPhone apps for a tech-phobic grandma?", "post": "My grandmother is 85 years old.  We bought her a computer in 2002 and after six months she threw a blanket over it because \"it gave her stomach aches.\"  I offered to take a class with her, but she was worried she'd feel stupid.  She's extremely prideful.\n\nThey recently found a tumor in her stomach, and she is undergoing chemo/radiation (as of three weeks in, it shrank by 30%! yay!).  She goes to treatments every day, for four hours.  My parents bought her an iPhone so that she would have something to mess around on while she was there, and so the grandkids could send her pictures/texts (we're all upwards of 1200 miles from home).  My parents are the only ones there to give her much direction on how to use it (yikes), but in spite of that, she still seems pretty excited about it!  I'm visiting home in a couple weeks, and beyond helping her organize it/learn how to use it, I'd like to put some interesting apps on it.  She doesn't have a lot of 'interests' per se.  She grew up on farms in the south, and has only ever really taken to reading and writing as hobbies, so I can't even really narrow down the types of apps I'm looking for.  Anything that might be interesting to an 85 year old woman, that is relatively easy to navigate.  Any ideas?\n\nThanks in advance!  Sorry if this isn't the appropriate place to post this - please point me in the right direction if that's the case.", "summary": "Grandma is undergoing chemo/radiation for several hours a day. Parents bought her an iPhone to kill time, and I'm looking for interesting/easy to use apps that she might enjoy.  Thanks!"}
{"id": "t3_47oe3e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26M] got a crush on [20F] acquaintance, can't figure out what she's thinking", "post": "Story: Met this girl a couple of weeks ago, through a mutual friend.\nShe's very straightforward, friendly. I've been \"jokingly flirty\" since day 1 - the curse of instant crushes - and we've been texting each other almost everyday. In my opinion we're getting along nicely, but she hasn't exposed herself yet - not acknowledging if she realized I'm hitting on her (she *must* have, I'd say).\n\nRecently I've discovered (she mentioned it in passing) that \"her ex's changed\", \"there might be some rekindling\" (almost her words) - after some initial discomfort I decided to play it like nothing's happened, going by a \"what's the worse that could happen\" mindset - keeping on with the \"friendly flirting\" attitude, like dropping \"wow, you're marriage material! [laugh]\" lines, for the sake of giving you an idea. There have been no negative reactions or any shying away so far, so that makes me doubly confused, having almost no experience in flirting and reading signals. Add to this that any physical contact I've initiated (still keeping a 70% friendly, 30% flirty ratio I'd say) was never \"rejected\" or got her to show signs of discomfort.\n\nWe haven't got a one-on-one meetup yet, while we see each other once per week - so far, we've only met for practice and kept in contact through texting - but I've asked her out, to talk about common interests which we have a lot of, and she's eager to.\n\nI might be overthinking or projecting, but being analytical about everything and unexperienced in dating&relationships, this situation confuses the hell out of me. Especially the stuff she mentioned about her ex, it might have been a \"discouragement tactic\" but I'm not sure at all.\n\nI would be...\"fine\"...with dropping a \"wow I didn't really mean that, sorry\" line if she was uninterested, for the sake of friendship, but still being unable to figure out if I *do* have a chance or not is driving me crazy.", "summary": "met girl, I've been \"jokingly flirty\", she doesn't shy away but doesn't give any \"positive\" signals either. Do I have a chance?"}
{"id": "t3_2mtkkc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] and my Boyfriend [21M] of 6 months (long distance), ready to break this thing off, but concerned about his mental well-being and family plans for thanksgiving.", "post": "Ultimately, this is a really shitty relationship. I'm quite disgusted with the way he treats me and makes me feel, I don't feel like I need to put up with it any longer. \n\nI've made up my mind about breaking up with him, I'm just concerned about the timing. I've already made plans to go visit him and his family next week for thanksgiving. The ticket price is a sunk cost, the money is spent either way, I just don't know if I should wait to break up with him until after the holiday and just push through pretending everything is okay for the sake of social graces and politeness, or if I should spare everyone the acting and just break it off now and stay home. \n\nIn addition to that, he's had a really rough week at school. I don't hate the kid, and I don't want him to go do anything drastic because of a breakup, but should I take that into consideration and wait to break-up when he's got everything else in his life under control?", "summary": "shitty relationship, concerned about break-up timing because of boyfriend's bad week at school and family plans. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_15nb57", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [20m] having old feelings for my ex [20f] while i'm with my current gf [20f]", "post": "So I'm 20m and my ex is 20f, we dated for over 2 years in high school. We broke up during the beginning of college, which was over 2 years ago. We've remained in touch through this time, occasionally meeting up and wishing happy birthday and merry christmas to each other. However, for the majority of these 2 years I've been dating another girl, also 20f. I stayed in touch with my ex as friends because she's an interesting person and I guess I tend to hold onto my old friends!\n\nAnyways, within the last 2 weeks I've had strong feelings for my ex. You know how your brain tells you that you can't live without this person, I even was dreaming about getting back together with her. This is where things get really complicated in my head because I'm still with my girlfriend that I met after I broke up with my ex. I don't think I have any problems with my girlfriend but in my mind I end up putting my ex-gf up on a pedestal (she looks better, dances better, the sex was better etc.). I hope this hasn't affected my current relationship, which is why I'm looking for help from you guys.\n\nIn the last month I've been in contact with my ex-gf and wished her merry christmas and what not and even mentioned that we should meet up over the break. She said she would like to but hasn't gotten back to me so I figure the ball is in her court.\n\nMy question is if I meet up with her, should I tell her my feelings to see where she's at? I've been thinking this might complicate things for her because I'm not sure if she's seeing someone right now. I've also considered meeting up with her and telling her my feelings and that I don't think we should continue this friendship we have. Things were fine between me and my ex before but these feelings seem to have popped up from somewhere hidden inside me and I'm not exactly sure how to deal with or ignore them. Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated! Thanks", "summary": "Was with ex for 2 years, broke up and remained in touch for another 2 years, while I was/am dating someone else. Recently feelings for ex have come back and I'm not sure what to do"}
{"id": "t3_llve6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Internet setup question/help please.", "post": "Hello. \n\nI moved and tried to sign up for internet. I called and it turns out the former residents have internet service here still. Then it turns out it is a bulk account for the building (so maybe it was that and not the former residents, idk) and I need to contact someone else. I didn't contact \"someone else\" yet. I set up the router and \"receiving\" is blinking. In the connection status I am sending and receiving many bytes.  Everything looks good, except for the \"no internet access\" part (also \"sending\" light is off on the router). During the setup it says my ISP may need my MAC address. I assume this is the problem. But I don't really know. I'm on a different connection, the one I am trying to use won't connect.", "summary": "I already have an internet connection from former residents which is from a bulk account, is there any way I can just set it up without contacting the ISP? "}
{"id": "t3_3i468d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Absolutely LIVID. He (27M) broke up with me (26F), asked to be friends, and then bailed on a mutual friends party because \"he still has feelings for\". What?!", "post": "*\"still has feelings for me\"\n\nMike and I dated for a little over a month. He broke up with me out of the blue, stating he just \"couldn't see himself developing serious feelings for me\". Fine, whatever. \n\nFast forward two months and we're in the process of trying to be friends. I'm treating him like a friend: being friendly, talking to him semi-regularly and just generally moving on with my life. I invite him to a party being thrown by mutual friends (along with about 25 other people). He says he'd love to come and I don't think anything more about it. He never shows. But not only does he not show, he sends me a long text late that evening explaining that he wasn't ready to see me in person, still had feelings for me, had been having second thoughts (about us), how he didn't think he could handle seeing me with someone, and just generally dumping all of his emotions on me without suggesting any course of action whatsoever. \n\nI waited until I was sober (earlier today) and called him to talk. Not only did he not have anything to contribute past what he wrote, but he promised me that he would never do that again/he was sorry. Why does he think he can dump and run like this? What is the point of telling me these things if you have no intention of doing anything about it? I'm furious, and feel like he's being both immature and manipulative, even if it's not on purpose. What do you guys think? I'm absolutely mystified by his behavior.", "summary": "Ex broke up with me, pretended to be my friend, bailed on a party and then sent me a text explaining he still had feelings for me but doesn't seem to want to act on it at all."}
{"id": "t3_2l9dpg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31M] and my crush [34F] of about a week have our first date. [Ladies] How have guys reminded you that they are thinking of you without coming off as clingy or creepy?", "post": "Background:\n\nThis is not my first rodeo. I have a daughter from a previous relationship and I have no problem starting conversations with those I'm interested in or even strangers for that matter. In the past I've been accused of not being communicative enough (this isn't limited to intimate relationships). It's not that I'm not excited or anything. I'm actually a great listener. I have a good memory. I go out of my way to help others *when they need it* but I fail at gifting and other subtle things.\n\nSo I'm wondering how I can show this woman that I am genuinely interested and that I've been listening without scaring her off. We've talked daily for the past few days and I've learned a lot about her hobbies and interests and I find her to be fascinating (and of course very attractive) so I would like to know that I've done everything from my end to get things off to a good start.\n\nAny help would be appreciated!", "summary": "head over heels in love. don't want to scare her off. don't want her to think that i'm not interested."}
{"id": "t3_3y0shs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (18/m) gf (19/f) farted while we were intimate and I got really grossed out. She's butthurt and won't talk to me now and cancelled our xmas plans.", "post": "Like the title says. Me and my gf (dating for a yearish) were messing around and right while we were getting busy, she let loose a nasty fart. I didn't mean to act so grossed out but I visibly reacted and went into the bathroom right away to get away for a minute. When i got back she was getting dressed and didn't want to talk to me or look at me. She left without talking to me and wouldn't answer my texts or calls even though I told her I was sorry and didn't mean to get grossed out it just happened.\n\nThis morning I got a stupidly long text about how disrespectful I am and how I obviously don't have any respect for her and my apology is fake. I got pissed and told her that it wasn't all my fault and that's when she told me she wasn't coming to christmas at my house like we planned. My parents are expecting her and have gifts. She's kinda overreacting and I'm getting aggravated with her for being melodramatic.\n\nHelp me fix this so I don't have to explain it to my parents?", "summary": "Had a fight with the gf about a fart during sex now she's refused to come to xmas at my house. Help me fix this."}
{"id": "t3_24j7vv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24M] just broke it off with my best friend [25F]. I feel like the worst person on the planet.", "post": "So last June I started dating my best friend. Before we started dating I had told her I was looking for a girlfriend, but nothing long term (3-6 months). We get along great, and I really enjoy her company, but I just don't want to settle down at such a young age, especially in NYC. She also expressed doubts that I was in it for the long haul, and has expressed that she wants to move away from the city, but that I was her anchor. Hopefully now she can make a decision that's not based on whether I go with her or not.\n\nIt sucks because I still love her so much, just not in the way she wants me to. She is the nicest person on the planet and her reaction to me breaking it off was heart-wrenching. I could tell this hit her out of the blue, and all she kept saying was she hoped this was a nightmare that she could just wake up from. All I want to do is make her feel better, but I'm afraid that if I don't give her space she won't move on. Anyone been in a similar circumstance? Any advice would be very helpful", "summary": "Dated my best friend, didn't work out, she's heartbroken. I feel like the worst person on the planet."}
{"id": "t3_3iixej", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by rescuing a feral kitten", "post": "So I just came back from studying abroad and have been staying at my parents house until I move into my college apartment on Monday. The house is in a quiet town, kind of suburb-ish. The backyard ends with woods and hiking trails. \n\nAnyways, my 80 year old aunt said she had a litter of kittens living underneath her porch. The only human contact they had was her feeding them in the morning, which she couldn't afford to do for much longer. My sister and I went on July 14 and spent an hour luring one into a cat carrier. We surprised our mom and she was not too happy at first. Neither our mom, nor the kitten, would talk to us for 2 days haha. We discussed that the kitten was mine. I would be taking care of him and he'd be coming with me to my new apartment. Things got much better after 3 days. We discovered he was a boy kitty and I named him Caesar (I studied in Rome). He quickly became very sociable with humans and you could never tell he was ever feral. \n\nMy mom has had two male yellow Labradors since 2003 and a female cat since 2005. Caesar was scared of the dogs at first but now they love each other. The cat is another story. Caesar is a tiny energetic fur ball and always wants to play. He charges straight at her and she's just not about that life. They've never physically fought but she does hiss when he's nearby. For 10 years she always liked to go outside during the daytime to hunt smaller animals and chill with the dogs. I let her out yesterday morning and she hasn't been back since. She has a collar on but no phone# tag. \n I now have this looming feeling that she ran away because of Caesar. I hate that I'll never know for sure and he'll be moving with me in a few days.", "summary": "an 8 week old kitten disturbed the pet balance already established for 10 years. Female cat said fuck that noise and peace'd out"}
{"id": "t3_sbso2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How illegal is it to use a cover of the original song, most likely copyrighted, in an amateur interactive game distributed for free.", "post": "I'm not too familiar with in-depth copyright laws so I get nervous when I see a strike or cease and desist on Youtube and such.\n\nRight now, I'm making a free choose-your-own-adventure game and I'm not a music composer.  I find it super hard to ask someone to compose a whole soundtrack for me for free.  So I managed to find a few sites that offer free music, but sometimes it's not enough.  I really like a couple of Youtube users' covers on popular songs, both of English and Japanese language, but I'm aware that cease-and-desist or maybe lawsuit could occur from the companies that hold the rights to the original songs.\n\nFor example, I like [this] to be one of the endings' theme song and would like to ask the cover artist's permission, but I'm afraid of having to take down the entire game because the company holding copyright will order a cease-and-desist.  I mean I could find substitution for those songs targeted as infringement, but it would be less than what I envisioned.", "summary": "Need further clarity as to how risky it is to use Youtube covers of copyrighted songs even if granted permission by the cover artist."}
{"id": "t3_4pn0hn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] & brother [22M] with childhood trauma. Boyfriend said \"he's too damaged and beyond anyone's help\". I kicked him out.", "post": "My brother and I (twins) had a nightmarish childhood. Both our parents were criminals and violent. They were angry at everything and everyone and always unleashed that on me and my brother.\n\nWhen we were 16 we ran away from home. We lived on the streets for a while until we were able to rent a room together. When we were 19 our dad was killed by the police. Our mom killed herself a few months later so we got their stuff. We sold their house and bought a new one and that's where we live right now.\n\nWe focused on getting professional help, trying to heal and moving on. I've been able to do that. Now I have friends, I'm in a relationship for a year with my boyfriend and my life is pretty normal. My brother however has struggled. His progress has been much slower than mine and he still isn't in a great shape. He struggles with making friends and having relationships. Therapy helps and he's getting better but it's a long and slow process for him.\n\nMy boyfriend hasn't really been helpful to be honest. He thinks I shouldn't help my brother since I don't owe him anything and that he's and adult and responsible for his own problems. Last night we woke up because we heard my brother screaming in his sleep (it sometimes happens, though not often anymore) and I went to his room to help him calm down and go back to sleep. He has nightmares about what our parents did to us. This morning boyfriend told me that my brother is a mess and he belongs in a mental institution. I didn't like what he said so I told him that I don't need his \"expert\" psychological opinion. He continued that I should cut him lose since he'll never be a good brother for me as he's too damaged and beyond anyone's help. I became angry and told him that he should leave.\n\nI'm very upset with the things he said. I find his comments not only out of line and insulting but also very wrong. He texted me a \"I'm sorry if I upset you\" apology. I don't know what I should do with him.", "summary": "Boyfriend called my brother \"too damaged and beyond anyone's help\". I got upset and kicked him out. He's giving me a half apology. Should I forgive him?"}
{"id": "t3_2jnyeq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [27 M] girlfriend [24 F] of one week already told me she wants to marry me", "post": "Throwaway account and left some details pretty vague. I can expand if necessary.\n\nWe met just over a week ago online and after some texts, we met up and spent the night together because she was moving the next day. The next morning, we agreed to try a long distance relationship (4 hours away) and we began skyping every day since for hours.\n\nDuring this time, she told me she is in love with me and wants to marry me. I was taken aback, and after talking about it some more, she is definitely serious about her feelings and she says she doesn't normally do this with guys she dates. We both come from a background of abusive parents, and we do share a lot in common, as well as common goals in life. I do think there's potential with her and I like her a lot, but it's only been a week. During this time, we've also been very open about pretty much everything, from past relationships, sex, family, goals, etc.", "summary": "Girl wants to marry me after one week of knowing each other and I'm wondering if I should be concerned at all."}
{"id": "t3_13lp9b", "subreddit": "self", "title": "(19f) I've been in and out of relationships, paying no attention to the one I should have with myself.", "post": "Reddit, I don't know where to start, but I'll begin by telling you that I have very recently been brutally honest with myself and it made me cry for ten minutes straight. \n\nI love attention, and because I am a very outgoing attractive girl, I garner a lot of it. I'm used to guys watching me walk by on the street,  women looking at me with envy or judgement, and people listening to what I have to say when I talk. *Please, please*, don't see this as a conceited statement, I'm just laying groundwork here.\n\nRegardless of the attention I receive, the knowledge of my beauty and intelligence, there is *still* so much insecurity. So what do I do? I get a boyfriend and things always seem to accelerate super quickly.  We move in together in the first couple of months or the \"L\" word is spoken (I hate to say it but my bf at the time is usually the first to), excessive amounts of time is spent together and when I think everything is going fine, **boom** the relationship dissolves and I'm left with myself.  \n\nI used to write, words were my art. Fashion was something I was so passionate about and I had a stronger sense of self than I do now. I look in the mirror sometimes and don't know who I am (as cliche as it sounds.) I live in a suburban town (though I am close to a city) and I don't have any friends because they have all floated away in the midst of my relationships. When people ask me what I like to do for fun or what my hobbies are, I draw a complete blank. When I pick up a pen to write, I feel uninspired. \n\nI know, in my head and now in my heart, that the only way to figure myself out is to be without a bf, but that safety and comfort of always being wanted by one specific person will be gone, and it scares me to death.", "summary": "I have constantly been in unhealthy relationships that consume all of my thoughts, energy and focus and when they end, I'm left with a feeling of uselessness"}
{"id": "t3_21i2ri", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] am jealous of my girlfriend's [26F] past. How do I overcome this?", "post": "Quick facts. I've had only 1 sexual partner (fwb) and hardly any relationships. She's had 7 sexual partners and numerous relationships. I know that she is devoted to me and I know that she loves me very much. I know she won't cheat on me and I am not jealous of her when she talks to other guys because I trust her. I am not even worried that I don't \"measure up\". \n\nSimply put, I am jealous of her because she's had sex with 7 different guys and I've only had one. I love everything about her, except for that. Every time I think about this, I just want to scream. It makes me acknowledge that she is an experienced woman that has gotten her fair share and gotten it out of her system (it's making my skin crawl as I'm even typing this), and I am just not. It also doesn't help that she is insanely cute and innocent looking. \n\nI know that she wants me, she tells me all the time that I'm better than everyone else. But this is a personal jealousy. If I had around the same number, I don't think this would have been a problem. It just reinforces the fact that I haven't gotten it out of my system, and I am afraid I might break up with her sometime in the future because of this. I don't want to, I really don't. I can't see myself with someone else. She is wonderful, I really do love her. But this is something that is putting strain on my feelings for her. It's sad but I wish we'd gotten together after I've had more experience under my belt.\n\nWhat can I do to get over this? I need to before I make a mistake. (If it helps, we haven't had sex yet but it's looking to be very soon.)", "summary": "Jealous that I've only had 1 partner before my girlfriend and she's been there, done that, with 7 before me. "}
{"id": "t3_33uz9s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 F] with my ex-bf [22 M] of 6 months, he used to chat with a girl from gonewild and flirt with girl friends, feeling confused", "post": "So I broke up with my boyfriend around a month ago, he is a nice guy but I think it was for the best (due to several things that hurt me and happened in the relationship). I have been able to move on and no longer feel sad without him, but since he was my first relationship there is something in my mind that I cannot stop thinking about.\n\nI recently found out that apart from the things he did that made me want to breakup (long story) he used to regularly chat with a girl that posted on gonewild in skype and that sometimes he just talks flirty with friends. It just overall left me confused, since he just said it's just his personality of wanting to get to know people (gonewild girl) and that he saw that being flirty with friends that knew him was harmless. \n\nI just want to know if I am expecting too much of a boyfriend if I don't want them to talk with girl strangers online (especially those who post on gonewild) or flirt with other girls while in a relationship. I want to date in the future, and I don't mind a guy having girl friends, but it does make me uncomfortable if all of their friends are girls and he chats with them daily flirtatiously. I know it is a silly question, but it is killing me inside to know if it is me who is overreacting or if it is actually possible to find someone who will commit in a relationship in the same level that I do.", "summary": "ex-boyfriend had a lot of girl friends and used to look for girls to talk with online, wondering if that is the norm for every guy or if it is not acceptable."}
{"id": "t3_to1wi", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Not sure where this is going (first post, please help!)", "post": "So here's some background:\n\nI, a 23F, have been seeing a 24M for a few months now. He's not a very social guy and suffers from depression occasionally, so has to take pills to help him.\n\nHe claims to find it stressful to participate in social situations, but he seems to be fine with me.\n\nAnyway, at the very beginning he was more into me than I was into him, but over time I've warmed to him and I really like this guy. However his behavior is very strange sometimes. We see each other every week (apart from this week) and he usually comes round, hangs out, and sometimes we have sex. He seems to really be into me but he claims to not want to make things official.\n\nThe confusing thing is all his actions prove otherwise, he casually dropped into convo that he was my boyfriend. And generally being intimate and affectionate when ever we're together. And the other week he mumbled \"why have you made me love you\" while we were drinking. But now he says I want more than what he does. I just don't get it because up until now, he's been more into me than I have been into him. He says he enjoys being with me, but doesn't want to be my boyfriend. He says he's still into me though, I just don't get it!\n\nCan someone help me decipher this? I know it probably seems obvious and stupid. Is he scared of making things official or something? Or maybe his anti-depressants are screwing with his emotions. Or is he just testing the waters a bit more.\n\nWhat shall I do? Help would be appreciated. Thanks.", "summary": "guy i've been seeing is suddenly becoming flakey in regards to making things official although still suggests he is really into me."}
{"id": "t3_hf4wx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Tired of people underestimating the importance of good nutrition - help me prove to my coworkers that I am NOT insane", "post": "Basic story is this - I am a vegetarian, female, 25 years old, 115 pounds, 5 foot 1. I work with a bunch of jock males who eat meat and white bread for lunch every day and pick on my food incessantly. I eat things like large salads with quinoa or brown rice and veggies, greek yogurt, you get the idea. I get plenty of protein, i eat a balanced diet, i don't lecture others on being vegetarian but am a constant victim. I usually just laugh it off but do have a tendency to get annoyed when people lecture me on \"how I don't enjoy life\" and \"how I eat rabbit crap food\".\nMy breaking point is this morning - I was talking to a few coworkers about how I need to do more cardio (I tend to end up doing more yoga/stretching type exercises and i realize the importance of good cardio), and instead I got a talk about how they eat whatever they want but because they work out hard, it doesn't matter.\n\nI KNOW this is not true - you can't just eat shit and then go to the gym for 2.5 hours and justify it. These guys are guys with six packs, great bodies, very athletic - but they eat shit all day and are proud of it too - snickers bars, crappy pastas, the works. I told them that even though they look great, their internal organs and arteries probably aren't doing well and that you can't just \"cancel out\" eating bad with working out right. They both literally laughed in my face and were like \"um, yes you can\".\n\nAnyways i am REALLY effin fed up with this nonsense. If i'm wrong, and you actually can \"cancel\" the effects of eating badly with working out right, well then i'm wrong. But i really think this isn't true - you might be the fittest person ever but because of your eating habits have high blood pressure, etc.", "summary": "Guys annoying me in office and telling me you can cancel effects of eating badly by just working out hard. Help me with some words on why this is NOT true! :)"}
{"id": "t3_18623l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Am I a bad person for not wanting friends? What good is friendship, anyway?", "post": "It just seems like they're more trouble than they're worth. In the end, no matter how much fun you've had, friends will always turn their backs on you, leave you, or stab you in the back. Human relationships just don't seem worth it to me, but our whole culture seems to revolve around \"OMG YOU MUST HAZ FRIENDS AND LOVERS AND ASDFASGDFGDFG\". \n\nIf I need help moving, I'll hire movers. If I'm depressed, I'll go to a shrink. If I need a ride, I'll call a cab. If I need companionship, I'll cuddle my cat. \n\nThe only person in my life that I actually have any kind of connection to is my mom, and when I posed this question to her (\"Am I a freak for not wanting friends\"), she got this look on her face that reminded me of the scenes in Sherlock where John has to tell the titular sociopathic detective that something he just did was \"a bit not good\" according to societal norms. And it doesn't help that she nearly automatically disapproves of anyone I choose to attempt to befriend, because of her own relationship history and trust issues.\n\nI've tried to make friends. I honestly have. All of them want something from me, and give nothing in return. I'm tired of having \"friendships\" that consist soley of me bending over backwards for these selfish people, then having them ignore me should I ever ask for anything. I don't want to keep trying. There's a couple of people at school I've been talking with, and they keep pushing me to come over or go to lunch or hang out more, and it makes me sick to my stomach every time they bring it up. I don't want to be a bad person and hurt them, but at the same time, I can't take how much it hurts when these people reach out, not realizing I'm an asocial freak who is never going to be able to be the friend they want.", "summary": "Having no friends: Okay, or a bit not okay? Are they even necessary? Is there something seriously wrong with me for not wanting them? Does anyone else feel like this?"}
{"id": "t3_30tk2e", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Tifu by flying to meet a boy and telling him I love him", "post": "So as usual on this thread it didn't happen today, but rather this weekend. \nBit of background info, me and this boy have been chatting for about a year now after meeting on tinder. We talk everyday on the phone and texting and snapchat and shit but have only met up a couple of times cause he didn't realise I liked him. We have since talked about how much we like each other though. \n\nAnyways recently he moved country for a job and I thought it would be a nice surprise for me to come see him. So I booked flights without telling him but I'm bad at keeping secrets so I ended up telling him. So Friday evening I arrive at his, things start off well, we go for dinner and drinks etc. Dutch courage kicks in and I kiss him when drunk, we go back to his and things progress if you know what I mean. So I blurt out I love him, like its the drink talking, I do like him but I'm not in love with him, but I tell him reasons for it (I'm sure drunk me had good intentions.)\n\nSo the next morning we wake up hungover, and he mentions it. I don't know how to tell him I only said it cause I was drunk, so I run with it. He leaves me in bed and goes downstairs, I go back to sleep. I wake up several hours later still alone. This rest of the day is slightly awkward, I try cuddling up to him on the sofa and he shrugs me off. We go out that night and he invites a friend of his along. (I was only over for 2 nights.) Long story short, the rest of the weekend he was cold. Waste of a few hundred pounds.", "summary": "Flew to see a guy I liked, drunk me told him I loved him, rest of the weekend was ruined. Alcohol bad."}
{"id": "t3_3dpdr4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my GF [20F] 3 years, is it time to end the relationship?", "post": "Hi All, I don't really know where to start so I'll just start blurting stuff out.\n\nWe've been having some issues for quite a while in our relationships, she has serious trust issues, insecurity and is emotionally abusive.\n\nI feel like I can't do anything without being in the wrong, if a female co-worker says bye to me or a female friend adds me on Facebook I get the whole \"Who is that? Why you haven't you told me about them before?\" She'll search people I mention and judge whether they're prettier than her... If I do actually add any female friends on social media she just starts talking shit about them or their actions until it's easier to just get delete them to avoid the trouble.\n\nI feel like she also tries to lure me into making statements she can use against me eg. \"Look at my friend in this picture, isn't she so much more pretty than me?\" \n\nIf we're not talking all day long she freaks out, if I only get to see her 2-3 times a week she freaks out.\n\nIf I want to spend time with my friends she starts acting like it's an issue but won't tell me what's wrong even if I ask.\n\nI told her last weekend that I don't feel like we have a connection anymore and she started screaming, crying and saying she was going to kill herself.\n\nI told her about all the issues I have and she promised she'd change but I think it's too late...\n\nI feel like my feelings have already changed for her and maybe I resent her? Like I used to love spending time with her and talking to her but now I don't even want to see her.\n\nI feel like I enjoy myself more talking to other people and being around other people.\n\nNormally after we have a big blow up or I'm angry about something it normally blows over the next day and I just kinda get over it - but this time it feels different.\n\nIs it wrong of me to feel this way? And does this mean it's the end? I've never been in another relationship so I'm not quite sure.", "summary": "How do I know when it's time to leave? Is this just another incident that will blow over and then all be fine?"}
{"id": "t3_2ihozk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [37 M] with my wife [33 F] of 3 years (together 5), she suggested I get a mistress.", "post": "So my wife dropped that bombshell on me on the weekend. Admittedly I have a bit of an insatiable appetite for sex but we have two toddlers, a house etc to take care of and I have a full time job. So sometimes time/exhaustion/kids/chores etc get in the way of play time.\n\nThat said, when we do have time and energy we both REALLY enjoy our sex life. As such, this came as a bit of a surprise.\n\nAfter talking to her more about it it seems this stems from her feeling inadequate at being able to juggle the house, kids and my sexual appetite all to what she would deem satisfactory levels. (For the record, I help out with the kids and home a good deal. So it's not that I'm running her ragged while sitting on the couch with a beer.) \n\nI tried to reassure her that we're both very busy with our family etc and  that we just need to keep helping each other out and make time for each other. That while yes, I would like more sex, we (both) need to have realistic expectations of our time/ability to do so. \n\nI have a lot of conflicting thoughts on the entire subject... I married her, love her dearly and haven't ever considered cheating on her but I do like a LOT of sex and being given permission to get it and sleep with other women is both intriguing but at the same time disappointing/sad to me.\n\nIs there anyone else that's been in a similar situation? Been in an open relationship and can offer advice/information? Help me sort out my conflicting feelings about it?", "summary": "I like a LOT of sex. Wife feels inadequate despite my reassurance and suggests I get a mistress. I'm conflicted about the idea and would love advice."}
{"id": "t3_tdo8v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, give my brother some advice for this police encounter!", "post": "My brother has run into some minor trouble with the law, and I was hoping that Reddit might be able to give him some advice. I asked him to write up a brief synopsis of what happened:****\n\n-----\n\nI was pulled over for driving with my left taillight out. There were three passengers in my car, for a total of four people. There was no weed in the car, no one was high, and no one had smoked in the car since around 4 that afternoon. There was, however, a pipe and a grinder out of sight in the middle console of my car. The officer approached my car, and we had the following conversation.\n\nOFFICER: I pulled you over because you were driving with a taillight out.\n\nMATT: I'm sorry, officer. I know it's out, I'm working on getting it fixed as quickly as possible.\n\nOFFICER: Is there anything in the car that I should know about?\nMATT: No, officer.\n\nOFFICER: Would you mind if I searched, then?\n\nMATT: I'm sorry, officer, but I never consent to searches.\n\nOFFICER: Why?\n\nMATT: It's within my rights as a citizen.\n\nAt this point, the officer says nothing else and walks away. One of my friends overhears him calling in a canine unit. However, he never informed any us that he would do so. He wrote me a citation for the taillight, and I signed/dated the bottom of it. However, he did not give it to me until after the canine unit arrived.\n\nThe officer then instructed me and each of my passengers to leave the car, then proceeded to search each of us \"for weapons\" (even though I said that I refused to consent to a search) before the drug dog began to sniff my car. After he told me that the dog alerted on my car, I told him where the pipe and grinder were. He then confiscated them, searched the rest of my car, wrote a citation for the pipe and grinder, then gave me the citation for the taillight.", "summary": "pulled over for tail light out, did not consent to search, drug dogs called anyway, given paraphernalia charge in TN for grinder and pipe"}
{"id": "t3_34w2z9", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Traveling Europe While Turning 26: Global Pass or Point-to-Point?", "post": "In deciding between purchasing a Eurail pass to use during my 6 weeks or travel, or buy each ticket individually, I'm weighing these factors:\n1) I will be turning 26 (no longer considered a youth) part way through my adventure.\n2) My tentative itinerary is Wroclaw - Berlin - Prague - Budapest - Vienna - Venice - Rome - Florence - Pisa - Barcelona - Paris - Amsterdam, a few of which are expensive as individual tickets.\n3) I'm willing to pay a small premium for convenience.\n\nFor anyone who has experience with the rail system, would you recommend I get a global pass since I will be able to take advantage of youth pricing, or would it be better to buy each ticket individually?", "summary": "Is the Eurail Global Pass a better deal if I will be considered a youth my whole trip, or is it much cheaper to purchase rail/other transportation individually?"}
{"id": "t3_34lmhb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[21F] BF [20 M] of 6 months, is wanting to propose.. Too soon??", "post": "First serious relationship for us both. Our families love each other, everything is literally PERFECT. He's financially stable, I'm still a mess financially and scholastically (still haven't graduated, in debt), but he's always so supportive of me. \n\nWe love each other and I know I want to marry him. But I'm also the kind of person that sets a time to everything. It may not make any sense but I wanted my early twenties to enjoy and date randomly and settle into my late twenties. It just makes me kind of sad that I met my BF too soon in life. I can't imagine ever settling down with anyone else but I also can't imagine settling down right now. \n\nHe was a bit bummed since he was planning on proposing really soon, but I kind of threw shade at those kind of couples without knowing, so he was almost in tears since he was already planning everything. I do love him but how can I get over having a time for everything? Like telling him \"1-2 years is the \"NORM\" to get engaged\" and just get over how it'll look to others?? Is 6-8 months considered sane enough to get engaged? \n\nI don't like the irrational part of love!! Am I supposed to feel vulnerable in a relationship? Is he moving too fast or am I just afraid to admit that I'm afraid? I'm so afraid of hurting him that I would go along with it just to avoid hurting him.", "summary": "BF of 6 months wants to get engaged at what feels like too soon for me!/am I crazy for wanting to put a time to everything?"}
{"id": "t3_17bkvc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21m) just got an amazing job opportunity 8 hrs away, gf (18) of 3 years says she'll dump me if I take it. I need some guidance.", "post": "I just got a summer job as a research assistant at a federal research facility about 8 hours away from my home. If I play my cards right, there is a good chance I will be able to land a full-time job there when I graduate next year. My girlfriend says she doesn't want to move and doesn't want a long ~~term~~ distance relationship. I understand her completely, she's saying what she wants in life and if I don't fit into her plans then there's no point in continuing our relationship. She's my first real relationship, and my best friend. Should I decline this opportunity and stay with her, or take the job and leave?", "summary": "got amazing job opportunity 8 hrs away, gf of 3 yrs says she'll dump me if I take it. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_20gx6g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(22f) I need help with suffocatingly attached (25m) boyfriend!", "post": "I have been dating my boyfriend since I have been in high school. This past year I have been noticing how incredibly clingy he is... I am unsure if he was this way before and I just didn't notice or it never bothered me, but as of lately I feel like I can't breathe around him. \n\nI go to school and work full time.  When I'm not doing either or,  he is always there with me. It has never really bothered me before but it's starting to get to the point where I feel like I'm starting to dread going home. I want my independence and I have talked to him about giving me some breathing space but he takes it as an insult, saying that he just misses me and wants to spend more time with me. \n\nI do care about him very much but I really need some 'me' time away from him. He can talk forever which is nice at times but my jaw is beginning to get sore from trying to keep up... he gets extremely offended if I don't verbally respond to what he says. \n\nAll I would like is to find a way to let him know that I need some time alone from him for the sake of being alone... not because I don't care for him or anything. I've tried to tell him that and he takes it like I want to leave him which is not the case. \n\nSorry for any spelling or grammar errors... literally typing this very late into the night because he thinks I'm sleeping :/", "summary": "Boyfriend is clingy and won't leave me alone, how do I communicate to him that I need some alone time? "}
{"id": "t3_40o2yt", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "27 yr old planning on getting an apartment in July with my 20 yr d brother. How do I plan so We don't have to struggle?", "post": "Due to circumstances I have to live on my own, living with parents is out of the question and my little brother wants to get out as well. I am renting a room for $400 dollars a month until July and then I am on my own. I live in NJ and we want to move to Philadelphia as we are very close. I will be able to commute to work but plan on keeping an eye out in the city. My brother makes 8.75 working around 30 hours a week. I make 13 an hour working 40 hours a week and sometimes over time which is time an a half. After taxes I make 804 every other week. I am in debt 11,000 but have been making monthly payments and will be getting a credit card this Friday to build my credit and also have something for emergencies. My question is, is this doable? I will have to pay 80$ for tolls if I move to Philadelphia which will be an added expense. I am not sure if it is worth it. My current bills excluding my rent are as follows.\n75 phone\n91 car insurance \n50 towards debts\n30 misc Netflix ect.\nI am thinking 800 a month is doable, I also know we will have utilities.", "summary": "my 20 year old brother and I(27) plan on getting an apartment in the city, we both are living modestly. Is this realistic? If so I would take any advice."}
{"id": "t3_2sgms9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [15F] like this guy [16M] in my class, but he might think that I hate him", "post": "I've talked to the guy that I like quite a few times, but for some reason, today when I was going to get a paper, he was in front of me and he turned around and said, \"What, Bianca?\" In a way that he was trying to sound like a tough guy, but I knew he was playing.\n\nI didn't say anything, because I didn't really know what to say and I was in kind of a gloomy mood from something that had happened in my previous class, and my terrible mood probably showed on my face, and his friend (who is a girl and I think that they are possibly together because at every chance they get to be near each other, they do) said, \"She really hates you.\"\n\n'NO I DON'T!!!!!!' I screamed in my mind, but I didn't say anything, because again, I didn't know what to say and I didn't want to make it even more awkward, so I just went and sat down. This put me in even worse of a mood, and I think all future communications with him will be ruined.\n\nI was also trying to talk to him more and try to become his friend, but I always lose my words when it actually comes time to go and talk to him. He goes up to me sometimes, but it's never a long conversation, and I'm afraid he won't even do that anymore because of what his friend said. Please tell me how to fix this and how to start our friendship on the right track!", "summary": "The guy I like's friend told him that I hated him after I didn't respond to a joke he made (I mean, tbh, it was a pretty lame joke)"}
{"id": "t3_2rhgrf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18m] and my girlfriend [17f] just started on a break last night and I don't really know what to do. All I know is that I really miss her.", "post": "We've only been dating a month and a half or so, but whenever we hung out it was super fun, but this past week it felt weird and like I was annoying her.\n\nWe had a bunch of stuff to do that we had planned with friends so we both kind of ignored the awkwardness. Until last night that is, when I finally grew a pair and asked her about it. \n\nHer answers to most of my questions about our relationship was \"I don't know\" or \"I'm just confused.\"\n\nNow I'm really confused (and hurt I guess too). I thought everything was going great. We're seniors in high school and will be going to different colleges in the fall. Neither of us wants a long distance relationship, but still I thought we could have fun with the time we had left together. Now I just feel bummed and led on.\n\nI'm not really sure if I should completely avoid her until she's made up her mind, act like we're still kinda dating, or act like we're just friends. Has anyone else ever go through a similar thing?", "summary": "My girl friend and I are on a break because she's \"confused\" and I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Also I'm looking for support/empathy/discussion I guess."}
{"id": "t3_10cg7x", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What should I do about this? (details inside) please and thank you. X-post from /r/advice", "post": "My girlfriend, age 16, was raped by someone she thought was her friend -probably age 16- while hanging out with him at a nearby lake on the first of September. His reason was that he thought they would \"work well together\" and that he only needed to show her. I, age 17, cannot even begin to try to understand that twisted, fucked logic system. She refuses to go to the police, or give me his name because she doesn't want me to get hurt and she thinks cops do more harm than good.\nAs it turns out when he raped her he wrenched her right leg so far that she strained a major muscle. Yesterday as she and one of my friends were horsing around she tore it further. I took her to the emergency room with her mom and she needed three doses of an IV painkiller, two doses of another IV painkiller and two doses of a muscle relaxant (also an IV). Even then she refused to tell her doctor, or her mom, anyone but me, about the rape. And even I was not aware of the leg injury until yesterday when she and one the friend I mentioned before fucked it up further. Whenever the pain medications prescribed to her last night wears off she is in excruciating pain for quite a while before they kick in and she is able to get calmed down.\nIn addition to this, there was a period of about two weeks when we thought she could be pregnant because the rapist later told her his condom \"might have broke\". I am angry whenever I think about it/ him and I'm not convinced that he didn't just say that to try and get her to rely on him somehow. She also has nightmares about it frequently.\nSo I need people to talk to about this and get advice from. What do you think I should do? Who should I tell? How do I convince her to tell me his name?", "summary": "Girlfriend of one year and 5 months was raped three weeks ago on September 1, now in nearly unbearable physical pain and emotional trauma. I would like to know what I can do/ where I need to go from here."}
{"id": "t3_2nc4cm", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "My friend was brainwashed by her super religious grandfather, Help me please!?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years, well recently she vanished, her grandfather literally kidnapped her. He went to her house and grabbed her and all of her siblings. a month and some weeks have passed and now she is back with her parents riding home from houston. I am in SA TX. she will be here in 3 hours or so. She is saying that she wants to go back and live with her grandfather who I know and her mother and her father all know is abusive and controlling. How can I convince her that the man she has been living with for the past month or so is lying to her face? She seemed off when I talked to her on the phone a while ago. She hasn't told her parents she plans on running away so he can come pick her up and she can live with him. Just in case you guys are wondering I am 17, and she is 16. \n\n(", "summary": ") My girlfriend got kidnapped by her abusive controlling grandfather and now wants to move back, how can I convince her she is making a major bad move?"}
{"id": "t3_1nb9g9", "subreddit": "running", "title": "chafing the ladybits", "post": "Going anon for all the obvious reasons. Also, apologies to the men--you may want to shuffle awkwardly away now...\n\nNeeding some advice from the ladies: I have hit a serious chafing issue. I have been increasing mileage, up to 20 mpw at the moment. For the last few weeks, my long run has been KILLING my (admittedly larger than average) inner labia. Like, road rash.\n\nI wear compression shorts and no underpants at the moment--this has been my go-to solution for a really large butt that manages to pull down every pair of running shorts I have ever tried. However, now my ladybits are objecting: anyone have any alternative suggestions? I feel like underpants would be the obvious solution, but then I'm left with pants that won't stay up--the compression shorts pretty much slide down up until I hit the sweaty stage 5 minutes in, then stick to me like glue. With underpants, they always just kept sliding down for the whole damn run.\n\nIn a perfect world, I would like something relatively cheap, since I am dropping weight at the moment. Switching sizes in $90 shorts would be a bitch.", "summary": "ladybits chafing. compression pants with no undies a no-go. (cheap-ish) suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_1g6j6t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm pretty sure my boyfriend [27m] is lying to me [28f]. Could use some advice.", "post": "I recently moved out of the room that my boyfriend of a year and a half and I shared. Our relationship had been deteriorating, and I had completely lost myself and was miserable. The first couple of weeks afterwards was awful and he was incredibly angry at me, but over the past week I felt that we had made great strides towards figuring out what went wrong on both of our parts and making amends. We have an appointment for couples therapy in two days. \n\nTonight however, he suddenly disappeared and his phone has been off all night. Roommates of his (acquaintances of mine) had contacted me telling me that he had been cheating on me, but he convinced me that they were lying as they do not like him and are trying to force us apart (a plausible scenario, they are very immature and would feasibly do something like that to make him miserable). I believed him. But on a hunch tonight, I created a fake login to OKcupid and punched in some of his stats. His profile was the first to pop up, in which he described himself as single, recently out of a long term relationship, and looking for short term dating. His last login was today at 4:30PM (shortly before he leaves work).\n\nI am trying to give him the benefit of a doubt, for the sake of working things out, but I am having a hard time. Any words of wisdom would be appreciated. Thank you reddit.", "summary": "moved out of room shared with boyfriend, reports of  his behavior have been sketchy and I found his online dating profile. Need help."}
{"id": "t3_zymgl", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Any tips for a girl who has asked a guy out on a first date? I really like this guy and I don't want our outing to go flat!", "post": "I'm 19F, he's early twenties. The date is in about a week. I haven't had much dating experience, so I sort of feel like a retriever in a chem lab here. Most of the first date tips I've found online are for a man taking a woman out on a date, but I feel like the vibes are a bit different in my situation, since I was the initiator. \n\nI want to be able to carry this date smoothly, however the mutual plan right now is to go out to eat and then wing it. I have *no* idea what we should do afterward, and I'm dreading an awkward fizzle early on. I am *really* looking forward to getting to know this guy better, so any advice at all is greatly appreciated!", "summary": "Not sure of my ability to carry a first date strongly, looking for advice on that, as well as ideas for what to do after we eat, and tips for keeping the date running smoothly. Thanks for any and all feedback!"}
{"id": "t3_su6j8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I trust my husband, but I'm uncomfortable with his actions. He doesn't think anything is wrong.", "post": "I'm 21 and my husband is 24. We have been married for 2 years. He's the greatest guy ever and I trust that he won't try to hurt me, but I feel like some of his actions overstep boundaries. \n\nSometimes he'll stay over at a friend's house - sometimes male, sometimes female - without telling me. I really wish he'd let me know beforehand, even just texting me before I go to bed would fix this. A lot of his female friends are really flirty and physical too. They constantly hit on him, even in front of me, and hug a lot. I'm really uncomfortable with this and I asked him to ask his friends to back off a little, but they haven't. Sometimes when I call or text him I won't get a response for 6 hours or more. Sometimes it might be a day or two before I hear back from him.\n\nI talked to one of my friends about this and she thinks he's cheating, but I don't. I know him better than anyone else and I know he wouldn't hurt me.\n\nIs there anything I can do? Like I said, these things all make me uncomfortable even though I know nothing is wrong. I've talked to him about all this and nothing has changed.", "summary": "I'm uncomfortable with some of my husband's actions (hugging friends, not returning texts, etc). What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2tl624", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M,16] how to respond to [F,16]", "post": "Long story short, girl knows i like her, gives slight hints she likes me back, then tells her friend she doesnt want relationship with me but its not because of me its just because she doesnt want a relationship. Girl will be telling me this in person soon. Whats my next move?\nThe way i see it, i can play it 2 ways. no 1 - Just play it cool, be like hey thats ok i understand, give me a shout if you change your mind. And if she asks if we can be friends, ill say no i need some space right now to clear my mind and focus on other things and people. No 2 - Tell her how i feel and ask her to be completely open rather than \"letting me down in a way to not hurt me\" and tell her that i like her a lot and if she wants me in her life, i wont be there as a friend or male girlfriend and even though i really like her, i wont be forever waiting for her like her backup. No 1 seems to be more casual, cool and masculine and relies on her missing me when im not there and actually changing her mind and then even pursuing me AFTER shes changed her mind. This plan seems to be less efficient but it doesn't make me look like a pussy begging for her. Plan 2 seems more honest and open and DMN like but might make me look like a wimp and make it seem as if im begging for her and i need her (which i hate to admit, i sort of do....). This way seems to rely on her actually liking me back so its like a go big or go home situation. What is the best way to respond? I like her a lot and this thing has been going on for ages...", "summary": "girl i like a lot is confusing AF, need a way to respond to what she will be saying to me very soon."}
{"id": "t3_3zxi6k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28m] want to see her [28f] again, but I may need surgery, which may make it difficult", "post": "I went on a date with a girl this past Sunday, about 5 days ago, and it went very well. We hung out for a total of 7.5 hours and I could tell she was into me. And I know I'm pretty into her. We've been texting back and forth, and she's actually been initiating conversations quite a bit.  \n\nI'd like to see her again over this coming weekend, but there's a problem. I have what's known as a pilonidal cyst. It's a non-cancerous, non-life threatening cyst that's, well...basically on my buttcheek. In fact, I've had it for about 10 years. Normally, it doesn't hurt much, but every few months, it'll flare up for a day or two and then get better on its own. However, over the last few days, I've been experiencing the worst flare-up ever, to the point where I can't sit down or lie on my back. I saw a doctor and he gave me an antibiotic and a narcotic painkiller and referred me to a surgeon.  \n\nNow, I may need to get surgery on this cyst, which means I may be bedridden or house-ridden for a few days. It may also limit how much...ahem...physical movement I can do and what positions I can be in. I may not be able to see her this weekend.  \n\nWhat should I tell her? I don't want to tell her that I'm basically having ass surgery because, well...that's kind of embarrassing. Should I just tell her I'm having lower back surgery, without going into the details? Should I tell her I may not be able to see her this weekend? My worry is that she'll either get (1) impatient about not being able to see me this weekend or (2) grossed out by my surgery and just end it.\n\nOf course, I'm not sure what the surgeon will recommend. I'll be seeing the surgeon in a few hours and he might just do some minimally invasive procedure that'll ease the pain and swelling now and do something more permanent later on.", "summary": "May need to get an embarrassing surgery, not sure what I should tell this girl I want to see over the weekend."}
{"id": "t3_2w9moq", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Question about saying \"no\" to 18 month old", "post": "When I tell my son \"no\" to something that is either dangerous (like sitting on the arm of the couch or trying to climb onto the television) or something that is an unwanted behavior (biting, hitting etc.) he looks at me and giggles before continuing to do whatever the hell he wants to do.  When my husband tells him \"no\" he stops what he's doing and sometimes gets upset to the point of crying (I think because his feelings are hurt).  I guess the question is, how do I get him to listen to me and not just to his father?  I have tried to make my voice sound louder and more masculine, but that just makes him laugh even harder.", "summary": "my 18 month old laughs at me when I discipline him, any help on what I can do to make him take me seriously?"}
{"id": "t3_zlaek", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M/22] I'm leaving my parents for another country and extremely emotional about this - how to overcome this? On top of this, a met a girl a week ago.", "post": "So, I've got enrolled to prestigious masters program in Europe and (I want to stress this) I can't not take this chance. The thing is, I'm massively emotionally attached to my parents and we have a perfect relationship. Graduating this university may lead to finding a good job and staying in that country for good (which was my intention, originally), but the thought of visiting my parents maybe once a year doesn't sit well with me. To make things worse, I met this girl (who I really like, but too soon to call it a relationship) about a week ago and who knows, maybe she's the one? Man, life is never easy.\n\nDear people of reddit, have you gone through something like that? \nPlease, give me some advices.", "summary": "I *have* to leave my parents (possibly for good) and new girlfriend for Europe; extremely attached to them and don't know how to overcome this."}
{"id": "t3_dcg34", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "To pursue a Computer Sc. PhD or continue working? Especially if one has no real intention to work in academia even after grad school ...", "post": "Rather self-explanatory post, but just to elaborate a little further...\n\nHas anyone, after working for a period of time, decided for whatever reasons to head back into academia to pursue a PhD in Computer Sc, with no intention to join the world of academia but intend to head back into the industry? If so, what were the reasons. Also, how did it turn out? Was there anything that you regretted? Did it work out?\n\nThe reason I'm asking for advice is because currently I'm employed full-time, and know how fortunate I am to have a job in these hard times. However, being from a foreign country and working in the UK, they are making it difficult for one to extend one's working visa because I do not possess a Masters/PhD and only a Bachelor's. \n\nIt's just a little frustrating because I have been here almost half a decade now, but I have been sitting on a visa that has no count towards residency and soon, I will have to apply for a visa with even more restrictions. \n\nI'm thus considering boosting up my paper qualifications, so as to prevent myself from being in such a situation ever again. I believe the stipend from grad school actually pays almost as much as I am earning now (in terms of spending power, not direct currency conversion), but of course, given if I spent 5 years working as opposed to studying, there might be opportunities for raises/promotions.\n\nObviously, plunging into a PhD solely for that reason is bound to get looks of disapproval. I am, of course, interested in expanding my knowledge and having an opportunity to have time for myself. I have had research experience (published a paper, presented at conferences) so I'm aware of the challenges research presents.\n\nAny advice from people who have gone through similar situations? Would love to hear from you.", "summary": "Software Engineer with a job I'm happy at (for now), deciding whether to pursue a PhD to improve qualifications and explore interests and a new challenge."}
{"id": "t3_167sh7", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "[m17] Just went through my first breakup[f17]. Some questions.", "post": "I post here a while back ( about backing off my girlfriend. I did, but that wasn't the source of the problem. The source was how polar opposite we were, and miscommunication. It was fun while it lasted, there was a leeeetle sex, but I certainly don't think I would get back with her. However, as I am still in highschool (a small one at that. I locker directly next to her) and we are in the same friends group, I see her a lot. And frankly getting over her is incredibly hard. We've become more friendly than right after the breakup, but it certainly doesn't mean I'm over her. Is it always this hard? Am I taking it too hard maybe? How do you move along in this situation? How have you moved along in general? How do you stop missing being in a relationship without getting in a new one right away, if there is a way?", "summary": "First breakup. 3 months. Wonders if its always this hard to get over a relationship. Sorry (not sorry) for being in high school."}
{"id": "t3_23y6j1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] am confused about the relationship with my friend [22 F] of 13 years.", "post": "So yeah, not really sure what to do at this point.  I've known this girl for most of my life.  We're super close.  When we were younger and first met we \"dated\" for a period of time, but back then it was a long distance internet thing and it didn't really mean anything.  It ended peacefully, and we've been close friends ever since.\n\nThe thing is, I just don't know what to make of the friendship anymore.  I have feelings for the girl, and I try to not let it get in the way, but it's hard sometimes.  It hurts me when I see her pursue a love interest only to get played for a fool in the dudes childish games.\n\nThere's time where I feel like maybe the feelings I have might be mutual, but I'm not 100% sure and I don't want to act on it and then make things awkward.  We openly flirt and joke around, but I've never really thought more of it than just playfulness between friends that just happen to be of opposite gender.\n\nI don't know, maybe I'm just crazy and I should just be thankful for the great friendship I have, but part of me isn't sure.", "summary": "Good friends with a girl for most of my life.  I have feelings for her, but not sure how to find out if they're mutual without making things awkward."}
{"id": "t3_17i13g", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Small claims situation?", "post": "My previous roommate has owed me a sum of $500.00 since November 14th of 2012. I thought he was a good friend so let me explain a little. We made a verbal agreement that he would not pay his half the final month of rent since he was moving out early, and in return, I would keep his half of the security deposit. Fair enough. I have known him for a few years so whatever; right? Well, since then the move out inspection, the security deposit return we had in our minds the wrong amount. We were expecting to get in return around $800 after usual wear and tear (seeing $800 is what we thought we paid for it) but turns out, the documentation team for our apartment complex only shows us paying $299 for security deposit. Doesn't make sense but I have no paperwork to back up my side so what can I do. I send messages to my previous roommate explaining he still owes me money for his final month of rent as well as the final half of utilities for that month. He acknowledges the fact he owes me money. His father gets involved and has a phone conversation where we make verbal agreement they will submit payment to me by the end of January; 31st at the latest. I have communicated multiple times via facebook chat, gmail messages, and phone calls with them but am getting no response. What can I really do to rectify this situation?", "summary": "old roommate owes me $500. Lives in different state now. Knows he owes me $500 and wont pay up. I have conversation between us to use as evidence. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4ab7l9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [16/M], feeling split between two people, and also feeling really guilty about it. What do I do, and am I a terrible person?", "post": "So me and this girl have been texting for about 2 months or so, and I've discovered that she's interested and wants me to ask her out. I've thought about it in the past but nothing really serious. A lot of my friends/ her friends/ people I know have found out about this, and now they all expect me to get together with her. Personally, I don't feel like we've gotten close enough and would prefer to get to know her more first.\n\nHowever, a couple months ago there was this another girl that I was pretty close with. We'd talk fairly often in person, and we shared a good amount of friends. I developed a pretty sizable crush on her, but we never moved past the \"friend\" stage. Eventually I figured that I didn't really have a chance, so I (tried to) move on. Flash forward a few months. We now have no classes together at all. I've discovered that one of my other friends now likes her. Unfortunately, I still have feelings for her as well, and am now fairly certain she feels the same way about me. None of my friends know about my feelings towards her, everyone knows that my friend likes her.\n\nIf I'm completely honest with myself, I would prefer to pursue girl no.2, but I'm afraid of losing my friend and that people might think I was leading on girl no.1 (I legitimately thought we were just friends.) \n\nI feel like a pretty terrible person for this whole situation.", "summary": "I had a crush on this girl and I think she feels the same way back, but my friend also likes her. I've also discovered that another girl likes me and everyone wants us to get together. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_17odi1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[First Post Here] My girlfriend is upset that I do not get mad at her; I have no idea what is going on. [Both 17]", "post": "So today my girlfriend of 8 months and I had a talk about something minor, but our conversation kept getting deeper.  As we dove deeper into how we truly felt about things, she ended up admitting that she doesn't like that I dont get mad at her.  Let me explain:\n\nI do not get mad, ever.  I've never yelled at her.  I don't know why, and nothing she does really annoys me.  I just cannot get mad at her.  I prefer to talk about any relationship issues in a civil and calm manor with her.  \n\nShe said that she doesn't like feeling like she is the only one who gets mad about things, and she wants us both to be equally mad.  But I cannot get mad!  She even suggested an exercise, where she wanted me to find something she did that annoyed me and yell and curse at her to convey my anger.  I couldn't even think of anything that she did to annoy me, let alone yell and curse at her.  So, r/relationships, please help me.  This literally goes against everything I thought I knew about women (seriously, I thought they wanted a guy who doesnt get mad ever).  Help!", "summary": "Girlfriend doesnt like that I dont get mad.  She wants me to yell at her when we get in arguments, but I am naturally passive.  What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2z6sw6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Can't get this girl [17/F] off my mind ever since I [18/M] was talking to her last summer.", "post": "So real quick backstory: I have friends that introduced me to this girl a few years back (like over 5 years ago) and I really didn't think much of her but then recently last summer she started to talk to me out of the blue, and we would constantly be texting or even skyping (Like I would leave my friends house to go home to skype her, and I've never done that for a girl before, I was infatuated)  , but here is the catch, she has a boyfriend. Now I'm not usually the kind of guy to mess around with a girl thats in a relationship but I really liked this girl, she seemed interested in me too, and I didn't know what her intentions were for talking to me out of the blue while she had a boyfriend. We stopped talking when I suggested she breaks up with her boyfriend, and ever since I can't stop thinking about what could have been. \n\nSo I guess I'm kind of wondering what I should do. Should I wait for her to break up with her boyfriend and be the rebound, or should I start talking to her again and tell her that I like her? Any advice helps! Thanks", "summary": "I talked to a girl in the summer that had a boyfriend ( she initiated it) and we stopped talking, but I cant get her off my mind."}
{"id": "t3_1hlurt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(M/24) Getting phone number of woman in my apartment building", "post": "I ran into this woman in my apartment building twice in one day last week, did the usual smile, 'have a nice day' routine. I see her again on Friday when we're both on the way home, she recognizes me and talks to me. I actually didn't recognize her with sunglasses on, felt a little rude. We have a fun chat for the 10-15 minute walk home. When we got to the building, we ran into someone else and they joined our conversation. I didn't get a chance to get her phone number.\n\nToday, I see a package with her name (it's fairly unique, so 99% sure it's her) by the mailboxes where the UPS and FedEx guys leave them, it has her apartment number, obviously.\n\nMy question is, would it be creepy/weird to leave her a note on or under her door that I liked talking to her, wish I got to exchange numbers, would love to talk more, etc...? or should I just wait for next time we run into each other?", "summary": "Met girl in my apartment building Didn't get to exchange numbers I see her apt number on a package Creepy to leave her a note?"}
{"id": "t3_1j4v2a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Pregnant [25F] with my crazy ex-bf's [40M] baby. WTF do I do.....", "post": "Crisis mode: engage. \n\n---\n\nWe (25F 40M) have been together for 2.5 years. When things are good, they're GREAT. He is doting, affectionate, thoughtful, admiring, and generally the best boyfriend there could be. \n\n---\n\nHOWEVER, when he gets emotional (and for some reason this tends to be around holidays) he gets BATSHIT crazy. Not physically abusive crazy, but completely unable to think rationally... he attacks and demeans and cannot see how bad his behavior is until I pull the plug on the relationship. \n\n---- \n\nI pulled the plug over 4th of July weekend. I haven't seen him since then. Last time we had sex was July 3. I was still on my depo shot. Yesterday I had such bad stomach cramps I went to the ER with what I thought was an obstructed intestine. Turns out, I'm pregnant. \n\n--- \n\nShould I give him a chance? I haven't told him yet. If I choose medical abortion, should I tell him at all? If I did tell him, he would want me to have it and he would want to try again. I have always wanted a child, and were it not for his outrageous behavior I would have no question of keeping it. He would financially support both of us, and would be unquestionably doting MOST of the time, but what about the rest? \n\n---\n\nI have a week to decide before I can't take the abortion pill anymore. Any alternative answers to what I've heard already would be nice. Thanks everyone", "summary": "I got pregnant the last time I had sex with my now-ex boyfriend. He is kind of crazy at times. He would want it but I don't know what to do. Keep/not? Tell/not?"}
{"id": "t3_2tmwdi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [26M] has asked me [27M] to be his best man with a condition. Am I being selfish?", "post": "So this one is kind of tame in comparison to some of the problems on here but here goes anyway. My friend is getting married and has asked me to be the best man but he said, quite assertively, that he wants me to be clean shaven for the ceremony. At the time I was caught off guard and happy to be asked so I said okay. However having had time to think about it I feel like it's quite unfair for him to ask that. It took me months to grow this beard and I'm very fond of it. A lot of people have told me I suit it and it does actually mean something. My last girlfriend couldn't bear the feeling of my stubble so I had to have a wet shave every day which I hate doing. That relationship ended really badly and growing the beard was (is) part of me trying to move on. My friend doesn't know this and has mainly seen the beard in context of me being a mess as I stopped looking after my appearance when I sank into quite a deep depression. I'm clawing my way out of that now and I've started to make an effort again. The beard is still there but a lot neater and last night was the first time my friend has seen it like this (he works away for stretches at a time and asked me to be his best man on the phone). He appeared to be looking at my beard thoughtfully last night, perhaps realising it is a style and not just a mess. I didn't bring it up last night because I was unsure if I'm being selfish. Am I? I know it will grow back but it will take months to get to the length it is now.", "summary": "Friend wants me to be his best man but on the condition that I shave off my glorious beard. Am I selfish to not want to do that?"}
{"id": "t3_2l8cl5", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "First Date with someone from Tinder", "post": "So tomorow night I (22 y/o male) am planning on meeting up with a girl  I've talked to from tinder for about a week or so (both of us were busy up until now).  I rarely do these types of things, but me and my roomates were using it as a joke one day and I ended up following up on one of the conversations I was having, and we really seem to vibe (as much as one can over the phone).  Thing is, I've never been much of a date person.  I have had girlfriends and we have gone on dates, but never have really had a first date experience, most of the time they were friends and it developed from there.  But I want to make a good first impression on this girl, not to mention I am getting older so it's time my methods matured to match my age.\nWe are meeting at a local bar for drinks and some food (my suggestion).  My goal is to just give her a good feel on my personality, get a good feel on hers, and just don't do anything too over the top to scare her away, while making sure she knows I am interested and enough of a man to make a move.  \n\nSo just a couple questions for you guys who have gone on first dates with people you barely know: how often do you end up kissing them at the end? did you ever not kiss them but she still was interested and you got to the next time?  if she is giving me signals and my dumbass can't interpret them, would she lose too much respect and would I not get a second chance?\n\nI know it sounds like I have no experience with girls, fact of the matter is it is just extremely limited, seeing as how all my relationships developed from friendships and everything else has basically been drunken hookups.", "summary": "first date with someone from the internet. how should I approach it to make sure that while I don't overstep any boundaries, I still make enough of an impression to get the ball rolling."}
{"id": "t3_slbcf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear Reddit, my boyfriend and I live on different continents; how can he obtain a visa to the United States?", "post": "Some background:\n\nI am a college student. My boyfriend (about the same age) lives in Australia, and so far, our relationship has purely been an online one. He would like to move to the United States at the end of this year so we can be together, but would need to find housing and employment. We have some funds, and my boyfriend is making about 13k a year with a part time job and will be getting another job soon, so while we won't be rolling in money, money isn't the real issue. We are more concerned about him getting a visa.\n\nFrom the State Department website, the three types of immigrant visas are 1) family sponsored, 2) employer sponsored, and 3) special immigrants. \n\n1) He isn't family, but he could get a visa if we became engaged and married. This option looks to be our only choice, but neither of us wants to marry without meeting each other in person. \n\n2) To our understanding, employment visas are awarded only to those who are skilled workers, and we don't see how my boyfriend would be able to be sponsored by an employer.\n\n3) Does not apply.\n\nAdditionally, he cannot apply for a student visa for college because we don't have the funds to pay for the tuition and additional costs, and his family (and mine for that matter) isn't willing to support him.", "summary": "How can he obtain a visa that will allow him to both reside in the U.S. and hold a job?"}
{"id": "t3_3p9llh", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Ladies, how do you react to people you've showed no interest in appearing more often near your regular places?", "post": "I was curious about this question because lately I've regularly stopped at a certain place where I do my activities and hang-ups. However I realized that near that place a former crush/date/ex works near there and I felt a certain feeling that she's willingly avoiding me whenever I am there and it feels awkward. I have no interest in pursuing her but don't want to stop being in that place because I like it for other reasons.\n\nSo from the opposite view, how do you feel and react when seeing someone you've showed no interest in appearing more regularly? Do you feel creeped by it, despite no intentions are made?", "summary": "Been hanging at a place near where a former interest work at. Feels awkward. What is it from your perspective of seeing a former more regularly?"}
{"id": "t3_2hrcnl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I(M22) get over my approach anxiety?", "post": "I'm a relatively attractive guy. I'm a senior in college, I'm involved in a lot of organizations(fraternity, Student Government, etc), and I've set myself up for a pretty successful life post-graduation. I have a ton of female friends who I'm close with, but not in a romantic way. \n\nHowever, once I start to think that I'd like to take someone to dinner, I start over thinking. For example, there's a girl I work with(F21) who I'm friendly with, and we flirt all the time at work, but every time I think about asking her to dinner, I freeze up. Another friend who I'm potentially interested in(F20), I have her number and we text on occasion, but I overthink how much to text her, what to text her, and so on. \n\nI never really dated in high school, and in college, I've had 4 \"major\" relationships. They all started pretty differently:\n\n1: We met when we were trashed, she was dating someone, they broke up and we started dating within a month. Never really went on dates except to the dining halls. \n\n2: I was drunk at a football game, we started hanging out, and were together within a week. \n\n3: Met at a social(both sober), but she had a boyfriend. We were close friends, but never went on real dates. They broke up, we started sleeping together. \n\n4: Met sober at a football game, invited her over to watch some more football, started hooking up that night. \n\nSo, obviously, I've yet to have a \"normal\" start to a relationship, where there's a couple months of dating before sexual things and defining the relationship. How do I get around the anxiety?", "summary": "Never really had a real start to a relationship(stereotypical dating before defining a relationship), and I get awful anxiety over how to start talking to someone, or continuing a conversation. I also overthink EVERYTHING."}
{"id": "t3_e0vma", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Why Don't I Get A Say?", "post": "I am a 21 year old software engineering student. My fiancee is also 21. She is the best thing that ever happened to me, and the light of my life. We met in high school, and have been together since we were 17. We plan to get married once we graduate next year. I love her with everything in me. We have been sleeping together since we left for college, she is on birth control and we use protection. About a month ago, when she was changing birth controls, we got drunk, and forgot to use a condom. Apparently, when you are changing birth controls, it doesn't work, because she is pregnant. I want her to get an abortion, and she knows my views on the matter. We can't afford a baby now, and need to finish our educations. But she is against it, and has told me that either I want to help raise this baby, or to get out, because there's no way in hell she's getting an abortion. I know the whole \"my body, my choice\" line, but why don't I get a say in her potentially changing my life forever? I want to have kids with her, eventually, but I just cant see it happening now. I know there's a big debate about guys not getting a say if the situation's flipped, but why not in my case? I know I can't make her get an abortion, but I just don't see why she doesn't see my point of view", "summary": "Fiancee, with whom I have been in a relationship for over 3 years is pregnant, I don't want to keep it but she does"}
{"id": "t3_2o9wig", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need your help reddit, be as blunt as you want.", "post": "I'll try my best to keep this short. I love my SO to death. I've had plenty of good and bad relationships and this one is just flat out the best. We are in a mid twenties for those curious. \n\nOne hiccup though and I don't know how to approach it without sounding like a dick. We both work full time. I own my house and she practically lives with me. She's a teacher and I travel for work sometimes and do very physical labor. We are both salary. Sometimes I'm gone for a week or longer and work 80+ hours a week. Sometimes I don't have to travel and work in town. \n\nAlmost every single day when she comes home and I'm in town, she always complains about how tired she is and practically acts like she is the hardest working person in the world (I'm not exaggerating that) . I always ask if she needs anything, offer to make dinner, get her a glass of wine ect. She never shakes off work and let's herself separate from work. This is the part where I sound like a prick... I know she's a teacher and a damn good one and very dedicated but... I work a lot more and much harder than her *shots fired from TwoX*\n\nMy job is a constant go, in fact I'm typing this from an airplane. But whenever I'm home, no matter how hard my day was, how sore I am, I don't let my day ruin my night. I just want to spend time with the woman I love when I'm not at work. \n\nHow do i approach this reddit? I need to be careful with my wording when I talk to her about this. I don't want her to fake a smile but I need some positivity in my home life. I get work is hard and some days are shitty but I am tired of constantly dealing with it. There is nothing wrong with our relationship but this is just a constant battle and her negativity after work needs to stop.", "summary": "SO makes her work life sound like slave labor. I have just of hard of job if not more. Tired of the negativity everyday after work. Don't want to compare myself but want to be an example."}
{"id": "t3_4ejudd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [18/M] leave my perfect girlfriend [19/F] because I don't want to be tied down (metaphorically)?", "post": "I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about a year now, and my fears of commitment have been growing even since we got together. I know we're both young and teenagers feel like they'll be together forever, but we have not had a single fight. Ever. \n\nWhen we first got together, it was just about \"getting some\". As time passed, however, we found that we were perfect together. We share the same interests, personality, and we still have enough difference to make it interesting. Most of you might be asking yourselves \"where's the problem?\". \n\nWell, most people get married when they're older. They go through life, getting experience, learning stuff, meeting new people, and having some good stories to tell when they're at the bar with their friends. Instead of going out and meeting people, me and my girlfriend are happy to stay at home watching movies and eating pizza. If I let myself be happy (short-term) I could be trapped in a long-term relationship (love) that would deny me these experiences. I want to be single again.\n\nThen I look at all the older people, (like some on this Reddit) that are looking for EXACTLY what I have. If I abandon my girlfriend now, I could come crawling back five depressing years from now, only to find her with another guy. That's a horrible thought.\n\nSo, I need help.", "summary": "Found the perfect girl: Too soon. I still want to experience the world. Should I break up? (or is ignorance bliss?)"}
{"id": "t3_3d5v59", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I'm 21 and technically homeless. Point me in the right direction?", "post": "In May, my mom passed away unexpectedly. I was evicted from the house we rented for $300/month simply because she was no longer living there- we were renting from my mom's nephew. \nI have no savings and my mom left me nothing- as her only income was social security. I work as a supervisor at a movie theater for $7.90/hr and work anywhere from 20-30 hours a week. I am a student but this upcoming semester all of my classes are online but one studio class. \nMy grandfather has agreed to pay my car payment for me for the foreseeable future. \nI have been crashing with my boyfriend and his roommate but my boyfriend and I would like to get our own apartment but I'm not sure how to go about that on our income. He also works at the movie theater making a similar wage but he is not a student and does not have a car. When he can't get a ride somewhere, he takes the bus. \nShould I take out a student loan to try to get on my feet? I can't stay in my current situation and I don't have any family support other than my grandfather paying my car payment.", "summary": "My mom and I were supporting each other but she passed away in May. I have no savings and make $7.90/hr part time. How do I get on my feet, potentially with my boyfriend's help?"}
{"id": "t3_2wg13i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [29/F] be upset that a girl I don't trust sent my SO [29/M] of 3 years a valentine's message?", "post": "I'm not talking about naked pics or anything overtly sexual, but a friend of my boyfriend's contacted him on Valentine's day. She's single.\n\nShe knows me and that we're in a relationship, but I don't know if she necessarily respects that. While this wouldn't have bothered me if it were one of his long-time friends who sent it, she isn't super close with him. She also has had a history of (in my opinion) acting flirtatious with him and crossing some lines with her behavior, and a couple times, being really disrespectful toward me when I saw her in person. I get the impression that she's sneaky and manipulative - I think she has an agenda - but my boyfriend disagrees and thinks she's innocent and just trying to be friends.\n\nIn any case, a while back, I got pretty uncomfortable with her behavior, so I asked him to set some firmer boundaries with her. He did, and he actually ended up going a step further and distancing himself from her as a friend. They only talk every now and then, and she's not happy about that - she tries to contact him a lot, and posts a lot of passive aggressive posts on social media. I think she blames me for losing her friendship with him - which isn't necessarily untrue, but the reason I intervened was because of the way she was choosing to act in the first place. \n\nBut back to the current situation: to make it worse, he didn't tell me about the message even though we were on a trip together on valentine's day. He usually tells me if he hears from her, so it's weird that he didn't mention it this time. Should i consider this to be a red flag? And either way, how should I approach this? Keeping silent about it is just making me mad.", "summary": "A girl who I don't trust sent a message to my boyfriend on valentine's day, and he didn't mention it to me. Trying to figure out how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_3vpl7v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] with my boyfriend [29 M] have be together 9 months I pretty sure he's racist", "post": "Me and my bf have have an amazing life together right now. Everything is perfect! Except I think he is racist my mother adopted her friends child when her friend died, hes 2 and Asian. My bf went with me to see my mom to have dinner, and the moment she left the room with with my brother he says \"Never through you had chinks in the family at lest she did not pick her self up a nigger\" He keeps telling me he was joking. I kicked him out of the house.I will never allow someone to talk that way about my brother I love him or say the n word around me. I haven't  spoken to him in 2 weeks he keeps texting me asking me to forgive him, but I just don't think I can. What should I do guys? Am I handing this right?", "summary": "my bf called my adopted brother a chink in my mothers house and I kicked him out and haven't talked to him since"}
{"id": "t3_18qmgf", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Injury Cross Training?", "post": "Hey /r/Running,\nI'm a 15 year old high school sophomore. I just found out I had a stress fracture (left foot, second metatarsal) a little while ago, and am forced to take time off. Hopefully I can start running again in late March/early April, and get in one race (probably not varsity though, as the season ends in late April, early May if our school goes to CIF). \n\nAnyway, when I start running again I don't want to be completely out of shape, especially since I already spent three long months developing cardio. Any advice for that I can to to insure that my cardio (and muscle development) doesn't go away completely? The cardio is especially important, since I primarily do the 1600 and 3200.\n\nMy local gym had a hand bike, but my family isn't doing so well financially, so I'm trying to not have to join. Right now I've flipped the bikes in my garage upside down and am using them as a hand bike, but they don't work my cardio like running or even a real hand bike. I can't bike since I have the boot on, and I'm going to the doctor Tuesday to see if I can do pool workouts (even if I can, I don't have a pool so I would have to get permission to use a friend's pool, and that could only happen probably 3 times a week or so).\n\nIn addition to any ideas for cardio, what weight training should I do? Ad I mentioned above, I do distance in track and cross country in the fall. Our team doesn't do weight training, but everyone says its important. Plus I need to strengthen myself to make sure I don't get injured again when I come back. I was out my freshman year in cross country because of tendinitis and osgood-slatter (spelling?) in my right knee, so I seem to be more prone to injuries that my teammates. Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read this.", "summary": "I have a stress fracture in my left foot. How can I maintain cardio and muscle while I'm recovering from this injury?"}
{"id": "t3_31oxbf", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Addressing favoritism in administration....do it or let it go?", "post": "Okay so I live in the dorms in my school. We have two young dorm  life supervisors (male and female) in my hall. They are both new and fresh out of school.\n\nMy particular hall is very, very small so everyone knows everyone. So all year everyone noticed some preferential treatment going on. Some RA's were allowed into the supervisors apartments, invited to outside events/ holiday parties and were generally  \"cooler\" with the supervisors. Everyone knew it and no one spoke out. The supervisors also did things the old ones would never do, like adding certain residents and RA's on facebook , tagging them in posts, and praising them.\n\nFor instance, we went to a conference because I am in a leadership positions in the dorms, and one of the supervisors went along. It just so happened that one of her favorites was there too. The whole they were buddy and buddy and it was very rude at times. She even snapped a photo with her and posted it on facebook talking about how much a wonderful leader she is and how she is determined to make her go far.\n\nSo hiring time rolls around for next year, and I along with some other people applied for Res Life positions. Long story short who got hired and who didn't basically solidified everything we thought about the favoritism going in. The \"hiring\" process was a joke and it was obvious they knew who they wanted before the applications were sent in.\n\nThe problem is we (me and a few students) want to address it without coming across as bitter because we weren't hired. We want to write a letter addressing some of the lack of  professionalism and then have a meeting with the supervisors. The letter is written but now I am just like \"fuck it\" I won't be in the dorms next year anyway and neither will by friend who is also speaking out. Even if we call them out those who are hired will still be hired. And favoritism is an aspect of any job. \n\nI feel like I will look stupid and bitter if I say something even though everyone knows what is going on, should I let it  go?", "summary": "Obvious favoritism with hiring going on. Everyone knows it. Want to speak out but don't wan to come across as bitter because I wasn't hired*"}
{"id": "t3_2uw8lb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [18/m] and I like this girl in class [18/19f], need advice on how to initiate something.", "post": "I currently am going to a community college and am sitting next to this girl who I like. Ive talked to her a few times during class ( a couple of \" how are you's\" and random stuff about the class in general/work). She has exactly the same attitude/sarcasm as me and I love it. I sit next to her in the front row of class and never know how to initiate something funny or interesting to talk about. From time to time she will watch me doodle on my notebook and pretends like she doesn't see me looking at her. We both think the class is really easy and super boring throughout it.  \n\nRecently over the last 2 days we've been walking to the library together and talk about random class related stuff. She goes to the library most days and just watches TV ( she has like a 3 hour gap between classes) , yet everytime we walk together to the library, she just breaks off and goes to a computer and watches TV like I never exist. \n\nI want to talk to her outside of class and want to ask her out to do something but I dont know how to do it or initiate it.  Need help/advice on how to take this further. First time posting here. Please help.", "summary": "I like this girl from class that I sit next to but I dont know how to take it further to becoming friends/ hanging out after class."}
{"id": "t3_16j6rg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help finding an animated TV series for boyfriend's young cousin???", "post": "So, my boyfriend has a 13 year old cousin. She is highly-functioning autistic, and loves to watch cartoons on her computer. She has been talking nonstop about this TV show for about 3 months now, and the best I've come up with is an episode list of what I think she's talking about. \n\nAll she says is that it's called \"Simba goes to the world cup\". I have found a TV show called Simba Junior goes to New York & the World Cup, which definitely looks like what I'm looking for, but I want to find it available to buy on DVD, or a website where she can go through episodes, and I figure reddit is better at this sort of thing than I am. Plus, it would totally make her day if I could find it for her, and her parent's day, too, because she's talked about it for 3 months or so now. \n\n[LINK](", "summary": "Looking for DVD/Website containing episodes of the Kid's show \"Simba Junior goes to New York and the World Cup\""}
{"id": "t3_1ca4yr", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "I feel like my vet is shilling for big pharma... Help?!", "post": "My dog is a one and a half years old mutt. He's been strugling with bad skin problems ever since he was a baby..  He is itchy all the times and sometimes will make himself bleed for scratching too much... I saw the vet many times for that reason and tried many different treatments. I personally believe that my dog might have allergies and I asked a new vet for a scratch test. \n\nShe wasn't enclined to do that and told me she wanted to treat him (and my two cats) for parasites. I explained to her that we already did that less than a year ago and it didn't help. She kept on insisting and since she's a proffessional I kept on nodding and agreeing on her treatment plan. \n\nShe took samples of his skin on many different areas to check for parasites and the results came back negative... I had a 300$ bill and went back home with antihistamines and lots of worries. She still insist we should start the treatment this month even though they didn't find Anything.\n\nThe treatment is \"advantage multi\". I'm wondering why she wasn't inclined to do the scratch test right away and if she's pushing the meds just because she might get a bonus at the end of the year for selling a certain amount... Do vets get that for animal medecine? Should I stand up to her and ask for what I think is the best treatment for my dog?", "summary": "My vet is pushing meds that I don't think my dog needs and I wonder if she would do that just to receive money from the company that produces those meds. Ever heard of vets doing that?"}
{"id": "t3_1e3yqc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[f23] boyfriend's[m24] long work hours are killing this relationship.", "post": "We've been together for 2 years now. I want to make it **perfectly clear** that I respect that he has a job, and I respect and admire how hard he works at it. I don't mean that he shouldn't have a job or that I want him to quit. \n\nTrying to keep this anonymous so I won't mention what he does, just that for the most part, it's pretty heavy manual labor. He goes into work at 1PM, and doesn't get off sometimes until 11, 12, or 1AM because he gets more orders that he has to fill. It takes him about an hour to drive home. So, usually, he's gone from 11:30AM-12AM. It fucking SUCKS. He works 5 days a week, usually, but sometimes he gets called in to work on a Saturday. \n\nWhen I first met him, and first became exclusive, he had pretty regular job hours. 9-5, typical. The company he worked for shut down, and he found this job. He started out only working maybe 5 hours a day, and then it jumped up to this shit because he had a few guys quit. \n\nThis has been going on for the past 6 months, and it's taking a serious toll on our relationship. We only see each other at night when he gets into bed (I'm already asleep usually, I have to be at work at 8) and then on weekends, he usually sleeps late Saturdays because he's exhausted. So Sunday is really our only day. \n\nI love him, but it sucks that we never have anything to talk about because he's always at work, or sleeping. I get SO annoyed when we make plans for a Saturday, and then Saturday morning rolls around, and his boss calls wanting him to come in. If he says no, he'll probably get fired.\n\nWhat can we do? I would never expect him to quit a job. So I don't know how to handle this. I feel like we're just existing to each other because we never have time to do anything as a couple.. nothing is moving forward.", "summary": "Boyfriend works all the time, we never do couple things, if he isn't working, he's sleeping. How do we handle this without breaking up?"}
{"id": "t3_3g9h5c", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Can I enforce my wish to not have my daughter's picture shared on social media??", "post": "Please forgive formatting, on mobile and all that jazz. \n\nI adopted my daughter when she was 2. Her bio mom abandoned her and has not made contact in the last 11 years.", "summary": "Someone is posting pictures of my daughter to social media against my wishes. Can I force them to take them down? What is my best course of action??"}
{"id": "t3_4yn83p", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I[18/M] might be the problem in the relationship with my lover.[21/M]", "post": "For some background: I grew up emotionally deprived, and didn't really start to understand that I was that way until my first relationship with a girl that turned abusive on both ends. I have a problem with empathy, and I am not easily emotionally moved by other people's emotions nor do I care autonomously about anyone.\n\nI like to believe I'm a good person. I don't hurt anyone or anything on purpose, I usually at least pretend to be sympathetic when people talk to me about their problems, but I've noticed I can't really do this with my boyfriend.\n\nI can't comfortably get close to him, emotionally, physically, or otherwise without feeling great levels of anxiety. When he was over at my house a few weeks ago and after he went to sleep, I had a good four hours of being awake brooding about how ridiculously bad at this I am, and I came to the conclusion that I just might not be dating material.\n\nI've known him for four years now, and we've been dating for eight months. In this eight months I grew distant pretty fast and I'm nowhere near as open with him as I used to be. My sexuality isn't a problem(I've had two sexual relationships prior to him and know for a fact I do indeed enjoy the male body), I think it's my romantic orientation. I might be aromantic, and I don't know how to approach this topic or even if I should. I don't feel intensely about anyone, not even him. I've been able to be incredibly close with other people who weren't romantically involved with me, even to the point I had a friend with benefits and I could share a bed with someone. I can't do any of that with him.", "summary": "Might be aromantic and in essence, a person who doesn't have a lot of emotion and I feel like my boyfriend would be better off dating someone else. What the fuck do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_yysg4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What do to in South America from Jan 26th till early 25th of Feb?", "post": "Hey guys, I'm heading to South America at the end of the year for 3 months and I'm looking for things to do. I like to party mostly, although I really enjoy being able  to relaxing beautiful areas as well, as long as they're not too far removed (e.g. Machu Pichu is probably out of the question for this trip). I figure I can get all the touristy/sightseeing stuff off the web and various travel books, but I want to see the party side fo South America. My main countries of interest are Chile (of which I'm a citizen), Argentina, Brasil, and Uruguay, although I'm totally up for exploring the upper countries as well if anyone can provide some suggestions.", "summary": "what festivals, parties, districts, college towns, and clubs should I visit in South America to have an awesome time (between 26th of November and 25th of Feb?"}
{"id": "t3_159ikj", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I feel weird that there are 0 FB pics in which my ex [24f]and I [27m] are both tagged.  Am I wrong?", "post": "We dated for about 2.5 years, and the break-up, (about 5 months ago) was both mutual and heartbreaking.  Neither of us have been active on Facebook since we started dating, but I decided to log-on tonight and looked at some of my pictures and hers (not my intention, but it happened).\n    As I was going through our respective pictures I noticed that not one time were we both tagged in the same photo, despite the fact that we both appear in at least 12 pictures (there are more pictures of us, but apparently they haven't been uploaded).  \n     I've accepted (still don't like it) that ending the relationship was the right choice for us then and that staying apart is still the right decision, but it feels strange that there are no Facebook tags of the both of us.  \n    Am I wrong in feeling like this?", "summary": "Ex and I broke up 5 months ago, there are 0 pics on FB where we're both tagged.  Am I wrong in thinking that's weird?"}
{"id": "t3_2pwoew", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Just got the greatest news and have to share it. Its not official yet so I cant tell anyone I know.", "post": "I work for a huge technical company.  I was just promoted to Technical Lead or Engineer III in October.  The excitement was short lived though.  3 weeks later they announced they were closing my facility.  Now I went from elation to depression.  Sure, I could relocate but that really is not an option for me and my family at this point.  There are no other job prospects in this area to make any where near the money I was. What do I do?  I took a huge long shot and applied for a Technical Program Manager position.  No way I get this promotion but whats the worst that can happen?\n\n5 Interviews later I got the call last night they are going to offer me the position.  I get to work from home and travel as necessary to manage technical projects and its another promotion and puts me onto the manager path from the technical path.  \n\nIt is incredible.  I am speechless.  3 promotions in 3 years and all my issues are covered.  It feels amazing and has yet to fully sink in.  \n\nI had to tell someone and this is the digital version of screaming as loud as I could.", "summary": "Its been a roller coaster.  Promotion, building closing staring at losing my job, to another promotion and working from home."}
{"id": "t3_1kn8bt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I just started working with this girl I am very attracted to and I would like your advice on how to proceed.", "post": "I am a pretty lonely guy, my last relationship ended when I was 19 and I turn 25 in a month. It took me a while to get my life together, still getting there, but I worked at a sandwich shop for the last 3 years before applying at a coffee shop recently. The sandwich shop was mostly men, the coffee shop is mostly women. One of the girls training with me stands out in particular, she has been what I'd consider to be a little flirtatious (it could just be friendly and I'm dumb) and although I don't even know for sure if she is single I'm starting to lose my cool as the idea of a relationship with her enters my head more often. I've looked up company policy on this sort of thing and it's all good, she's also just training at the store I'm going to work at and moving to another location which I think could be a good thing. What do I say to her to let her know how I feel? How do I say it? I have some ideas but I am terrible at this sort of thing.", "summary": "i like this chick i work with, technically it's ok if i date her but i don't know how to ask her out politely."}
{"id": "t3_1o8kow", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (m/26) broke up with my girlfriend (f/29) over the summer... Now I want her + a girl in another country!", "post": "So I broke up with my ex girlfriend 3-4 months ago. Main reason was that it was long distance and I now realise it wasn't working because I refused to compromise with her and move half way to live with her. Which I would do now... \n\nAnyway I want to emigrate and so went on vacation (post-breakup*) in my chosen destination. I met a girl (f/25) there that I have known for a long time and we got it on. Had a brilliant time mostly although there were moments we did fall out! I kind of promised her I'd come back for her and we have been talking on Skype / WhatsApp very regularly. \n\nI was missing my ex the other day and sent her a message. She seemed receptive but cautious and we have agreed to meet. I can't stop thinking about her, and what I'm going to say to her. I want her back. \n\nBut I also want the other girl. \n\nI am thinking that I am imagining a 'perfect girl' scenario with the girl abroad when I don't even know her that well. I don't even know if it will ever happen with her. Maybe I have a complex but it's like I don't want to let her down. \n\nBut I want my ex back too.. I mean for all I know my ex has moved on and doesn't want me back. Should I see her? Should I keep my options open? What's your advice reddit?", "summary": "not sure which girl I want. My ex or someone I can't have or even see for at least a year because she's abroad."}
{"id": "t3_t948k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I have sex with my girlfriend?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for just over 6 months. I'm a high-school senior, she's a high-school junior. This is her first relationship. It's not mine, but we're both virgins.\n\nI brought up having sex at around the 3 month mark. Her response was that she had always imagined that she would wait until she was married to have sex, but she was reconsidering it because of her relationship with me. I didn't bring it up again for a couple months.\n\nAt around 5 months, she found out I was watching porn regularly. This greatly upset her, as she felt that she wanted to be the one satisfying all of my physical needs, and she felt threatened because she believed I was attracted to the female porn stars. She made me promise to stop watching porn.\n\nI tried, but just the other day I finally realized that it was too difficult. I physically felt bad from the lack of porn (extra angry/horny), and I don't think she has the right to control what I do with my free time, as long as it doesn't affect our relationship (which it doesn't).\n\nI told her that I wanted to start watching porn again; she was upset and started to cry. She calmed down, and in later discussions, she's told me that she is willing to have sex with me to \"meet my physical needs\", although it is not her preference. She physically wants to have sex, but she says that her \"heart\" and her \"brain\" tell her no. The heart because she believes sex will be more special if we wait until we are older, the brain because of the risk of pregnancy.\n\nI want to have sex, and I honestly think it would be the best thing/next step for our relationship. However, I don't want her to resent me in the future for coercing her into having sex with me by threatening to watch porn. I'm really trying not to force her into anything.\n\nShould I have sex with her?", "summary": "My virgin girlfriend offered to have sex with me so that I would stop watching porn because it bothers her. Should I?"}
{"id": "t3_4wqtpa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my coworker [40sM] of 2 months, should I go out for a drink with him?", "post": "Hello everyone! I've been a long time lurker, but I've never posted anything before. Also using a throwaway because everyone I know is on Reddit. Here it goes...\n\nI recently started a new job (about 2 months ago) and I'm really liking the my new work place. Everyone I've met is super friendly and I like my role in the company. I've gotten along with many of my coworkers and already been out on social events after work with several of them.\n\nThere is one coworker, Paul (40sM), that I've been chatting with recently. We went for a golf lesson this past weekend and it turns out that he was interested in me. He ended up asking me out but I declined, citing that I wasn't really looking for anything right now due to a recent break up. We continued the rest of our lesson, but I could tell that it was definitely more awkward and less friendly than before. \n\nWe decided that we would continue being mates and hang out some. However, it does feel like he doesn't want to be friends anymore. For example, when I see him at work, we just made superficial chitchat, but not like before. I enjoyed being friends with him and would love to continue having a friendship.\n\nIt really is bringing me down because this happens a lot. I meet a guy and we get along, but he gets interested in me (and I decline), suddenly we're not friends anymore. I'm always honest with them because I don't want a relationship right now. I got out of a long one and haven't been single in a while. I just wanted to make friends and hang out, no weirdness.\n\nSorry for the rambling, but should I just go out for a drink with him? Just to see where it goes? It's not like a drink is a gigantic commitment. I have drinks with my mates all the time. What do you think? I just want to see if I can continue this friendship with him and get over this weird hump. \n\nThanks for reading, Reddit!", "summary": "New coworker asked me out for a drink (a date) and I declined. Friendship got super weird... Should I just go out on that drink and try to save our friendship??"}
{"id": "t3_34gpcw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18F] don't know if i'm being too rough with my [19 M] boyfriend because of his behaviour", "post": "I usually try to be very light with my behaviour, as I know i can be rough with it or over-sensitive.\nHe knows that and I always expect him to have a little bit of touch before saying things, he also knows i don't really like how people have to drink in social gatherings as I find no entertainment on that.\nWe're both going out tonight, i'm going out with a friend i haven't seen in a while and we're going to eat, he's celebrating with co-workers. I asked him if he wanted to meet me after the celebration because I knew he would be jealous of my plans, but instead he told me he didn't know if he would come because he didn't know if he wanted me to see him tipsy.\n\nI disliked that he was going to the meeting already knowing he would get tipsy, and i disliked that he told me he would because he knows that would make me mad.\nThe result is he noticed i didn't like his behaviour but I tried to convince him that he could do anything he wanted as I wasn't going to control him, but I'm still mad that he told me that knowing what my reaction would be.\nAm I right being mad because he didn't had the touch to not tell me that? (I already know I shouldn't get mad if he drinks or goes out)", "summary": "I got mad because my boyfriend told me something he KNOWS I dislike, and I don't know if I should or should not be pissed."}
{"id": "t3_3sp67s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21f) am a broke college student and my boyfriend's (22m) birthday is a little over a month away. No idea what to do for him!", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together almost two years and lived together for the past 6 months. Things have been great and I wouldn't change a thing. This year for my birthday he went all out, he got me some clothes and a video game and took me out to dinner. I know he had to have spent a fair amount of money on me. Well, now it's his birthday coming up and it's the end of the year. All my financial aide that I had been living off of went to rent and food and I have 2 dollars in my bank account. He recently got a job since he is not a student and has been providing for us for the past month, but before that I payed for everything. \n\nI'm not quite in a position where I can get a job because of school and sports or make any money, we live in a secluded area with not many options for extra income like donating plasma. I guess I'm looking for options of what I can do for him to make his birthday special and memorable with basically no money. I don't want him to think I don't care about him, I'm just not in a position to spend money on him right now.", "summary": "I have absolutely no money and my boyfriend's birthday is coming up. What are some ideas of ways I can make his day special without spending money!?"}
{"id": "t3_10soar", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Where is this relationship going?? (M18) (F17)", "post": "So I (M18) have been dating my GF (F17) for a little under 2 years, and to be honest I am confused on where we are taking things.\n\nI am recently out of school and she is still in school, and already I have noticed a decline in both our social, and sexual relationship. A month from now I will be travelling for approx. a month to the other side of the world and then moving a solid 5 hours away from my current location when I return.\n\nWe have talked about going into a LDR, and at the time I was confused but agreed to try it out. and now that I'm getting a feeling for how it will be (without the distance) I'm becoming even more confused and am constantly wondering where our relationship is going for us and if we should try a LDR. is this normal? is it right for me to ponder our relationship like this, or should I leave it be? and what should I do to come to a conclusion about this?", "summary": "I(M18) am moving away soon, and have been confused about the current condition of my relationship, I am constantly wondering where things are going. Is this normal? what should I do about this?"}
{"id": "t3_1lxja9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26F] just broke up with my boyfriend [23] of 1 year and think I changed my mind", "post": "I have been with my boyfriend for about a year. For the most part we've had a great relationship, however he is very disorganized which has caused him to sometimes put things before me. For example, he procrastinates so then time that we would have spent together is spent writing that paper that is due. Or he's playing video games until he falls asleep and doesn't text me back or talk to me until the next morning.\n\nHe has not gone to France for a study abroad program and within one week has ditched me twice over FaceTime. Both of these times were because he went drinking. I just don't feel like a priority. We have talked about it and he has said that he doesn't think he's ready to change. (At least he's honest.)\n\nI broke up with him this morning which was hard in itself. When he says things like he isn't ready to change I feel hurt and want to get back together, but then when he says that he wants to make us last, I feel that I made the right choice. \n\nDid I?", "summary": "Broke up with Boyfriend cause I felt like a second class citizen in the relationship, now I'm not sure it was the right call cause I feel bad."}
{"id": "t3_lbix2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Roommate's boyfriend is over far too often for my liking.", "post": "I'm 20(F), flatmate is 19(F). She and I met through a mutual friend last year, and have gotten along very well since then. \n\nWhen we decided to live together for university (I couldn't afford to pay for my flat alone), I asked her if she would be having people over a lot, because I get very uncomfortable when guests stay overnight, due to anxiety-related issues. She told me that she didn't have guests over often. \n\nWe've only been living together since the start of the semester, so maybe about five weeks? In that time, her boyfriend has been over nearly every week (usually in the middle of the week, and stays 2-4 days). I confronted her about a couple of weeks back, asking her if she could have him over less often. Since the month of October is very busy for both of us, I asked if she could make sure that we could have a few weeks without his company. She promised that she would cooperate, but then today, he showed up, supposedly unannounced (this happened last week as well).\n\nNow, he's a really nice guy, so I don't want to be a bitch about it, but I really can't deal with him being over all the time. I understand that since they live in different cities, they would want to visit each other often, but I find it terribly inconsiderate that she lets him spend so much time here, when we agreed about this issue before moving in together. What should I do?", "summary": "Roommate's boyfriend has been over far too often for my liking, and even after talking to my roommate, he still continues to come over several days every week."}
{"id": "t3_b3o14", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hi REDDIT. Help me find some harder, more extreme free hardcore porn.", "post": "Hi all. I've reached place I think may of you all have already passed... the \"standard\" porn I've been subsisting on, really doesn't work for me any more.  I mean... it gets the job done but it doesn't excite me the way that maybe 6 years back even still photos of pretty boring \"pose shots\" did.  I have a huge collection of movies (mainly group and couple hardcore) that just doesn't do it for me any more.  I went through a brief bukkake phase but I was kind of grossed out by it, and didn't return. So I'm appealing to all you redditers to comment and send me a few links to some sites that feature quality porn that's more hardcore. I'm looking for something exciting, different and just plain more (maybe extreme orgy stuff or something).  I have no interest in SCAT, I've never seen two girls one cup but even the description turns me off.  Anyway, I'm here on reddit, and I think I came to the right place... please prove me right. \n\nAnd yes, this is a temp account. Though also my first reddit account.  I'll get a real account right after this (from a different IP).", "summary": "I need some more hardcore porn, but no scat. Please send me links to free sites that have movies (avi,wmv,mpg)."}
{"id": "t3_k85i5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Neighbor has a dog, in a cage, in his garage, almost all the time. Is that legal?", "post": "These people have lived across from me for over a year. They have a home made wooden cage near the end of the garage. I've seen them take the dog out of the cage literally once. A younger guy walked the dog down the street for about 20 yards, came back to have his mother spray the dog with the hose while he held it back on a leash. To be fair, they sprayed the dog with the cone/mist setting in some attempt to clean the dog, not necessarily to piss it off. We live in Michigan, and the garage faces the west, so everyday this summer, the dog dealt with sun on it from 1pm till sunset, on some very hot days. The dog barks almost constantly, but they close the garage when it gets to be too much, so only they and the neighbors directly next to them can hear it, unless you walk past their house.\n\nAs far as I can see, the dog looks fairly healthy. It's some sort of husky type dog from what I can tell. I sort of know the neighbors directly next door to them, and they just facepalm when I make mention of it. They obviously hate the noise, but apparently they work for the guy who owns the dog, so they can't necessarily call the cops or say anything out right, so they say. They also say that the neighbors reason for keeping it caged up is because it's too vicious around small children.\n\nI like dogs, I like animals in general, I don't go out of my way to call people on their stupid bullshit, but this seems ridiculous to me. I can't find any solid, concrete information saying what they are doing is wrong, only because the dog looks to be in decent health. \n\nShould I do or say something? Or would it just turn me into the neighborhood asshole for prying into other peoples business?", "summary": "Neighbors keep their barking dog locked up almost all the time in the garage in a wooden cage, would I be in the right if I said something or called authorities?"}
{"id": "t3_2kp534", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Caught Boyfriend Admiring Google Images Of Celebrity In My Own Apt When I Was 5ft Away - Should I Not Feel Hurt?", "post": "M(29) F(27)\n\nWe've been together for nearly five years, and the majority of our time together is euphoric. We haven't lost the spark with each other, and we continue to fall more and more in love. This isn't one-sided. \n\nLast night, however, we were watching The Addams Family for a while when he had to leave the living room to work in the kitchen (on the computer). This had already been the plan. I get up to get chips and catch him browsing google images of a grown Christina Ricci, but he quickly Xes out of the page when I come into the kitchen. Now, the actual looking of the photos wouldn't have alerted me. I would have simply thought he was comparing age. But when I asked him why he acted shady about it, he admitted he was gawking over her because he was attracted to her. \n\nI know men look at porn. That's never bothered me. But when you're five feet away from the person you're with, why gawk over a celebrity on the internet? The fact that it wasn't porn -- it was her beautiful face (I look nothing like her) -- and the fact that he was so defensive about it has left a lingering feeling of hurt. \n\nAm I being irrational?", "summary": "He Xed it out and was shady about it, which is why it hurts me more. Am I being irrational over it?"}
{"id": "t3_lq7xm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear Reddit, did any of you change your college or major late in the game (Junior or Senior year)?", "post": "I am a college junior who was pushed into going to a Liberal Arts college by my parents (I am very thankful for their help with paying for college).  I am a biology major, and after every test I take I am reminded about how much I suck at this stuff!  I really wanted to go to art school and pursue a career in fine arts photography (I won many national awards in High School).  \n\nIf I switch schools, that will cost a lot of money (extra years on college) and finding a job with a Bachelor in Fine Arts  will most likely be harder than finding a job with a Bachelors degree in Biology.", "summary": "Did you change your major or school late in the game? Why? And if you didn't did you think about it? "}
{"id": "t3_53g1qv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my GF [18F] 7 months, wants to go to schoolies without me", "post": "So my GF and I have been together for just over half a year and enjoy a great relationship, we are very understanding and communicate well. The main issue is that my gf is a little bit of a \"follower\" when it comes to her friends. She always tries to please everyone rather than make compromises and has trouble saying no to her friends.\n\nThis is a perfect example of that. In Australia we have this massive event called schoolies after graduating high school where graduates gather, usually along the beach in Queensland to drink, do drugs and just celebrate the end of high school in general. Well My GF's friends basically said that they don't want me to come with her cause they want it to be a \"girl's thing\". And of course my gf agrees and doesn't counter or say why she wants me to come. She's just like \"well I tried but the girls don't want you there.\" And this isn't just for a few nights it's a whole two weeks of her going up there. \n\nShe was raised in a very strict Jewish household so she is definitely going to be drinking, smoking pot and doing drugs as a way of rebelling against her parents. Which is all fine cause I like that stuff too, I just feel like I'm missing out on all the fun, you know?\n\nAlso lastly my gf is incredibly good looking, has a very nice body and her face is very symmetrical (attractive). Whenever we go to clubs or bars together she gets approached by at least 3 or 4 guys a night so is it wrong for me to be worried about that sort of stuff??", "summary": "My GF's friends won't let me go to schoolies with her, how to bring this up with them? Should I be worried??"}
{"id": "t3_1i9db5", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "International student on OPT. Needs some advice", "post": "Hi, I'm a 22 year old, just graduated international student.\nI got approved of Optional Practical Training, and currently looking for a job. I can only work that is related to my major, which is Dramatic arts. I studied acting, scenic designing and costume designing.\n\nI have to pay for rent and groceries and everything, but since I just got out of college, I won't be paid much in the business.  \n\nI cannot work part time in anything but something related to dramatic arts, and I want to survive. \n\nIs there any grants or financial aid international student can do?\n\nI don't know what to do and I don't want to give up on my dream.\n\nIs there any advice out there?\n\nI desperately need some advice. Thanks", "summary": "I am an international student that just graduated. I need to find a way to sustain myself while working in dramatic arts. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3mtzaq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by sneezing so hard I have to waddle.", "post": "This is happening now. I'm taking my regular morning poo and checking out reddit. Suddenly, a sneeze. I turn my head. Another sneeze. And another. Here's the thing. I sneezed so hard that it blew the last (nearly empty) roll of toilet paper onto the watery floor of the bathroom. Let me explain. My girlfriend, who is dear to my heart, has some bad habits. She gets out of the shower without drying off first, leaving a big wet mess on the floor. Also, she has a free standing toilet paper holder she likes to use as a balancing device for the tp (because who has time to put it on the roller?! And it's too hard! There's gotta be a better way!). Now the near empty tp roll is soaked, and I have no other option than to sit here and wait for the shit on my hairy bunghole to dry just enough that it won't mush around too much in my ass as I waddle over to the kitchen for some emergency paper towels.", "summary": "Lacked the forethought to buy tp before sneezing the last roll into a wet shower puddle. Now waiting to waddle with wet waste in my white ass to hunt down some substitute to wipe with."}
{"id": "t3_2bitu2", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by commenting on someone's browser ads", "post": "I helped a young lady with a computer problem in a coffee shop this morning (couldn't login to school site to upload files); in the process I couldn't help but notice all her google ads (targeted based on her search history) were of jewelry, especially engagement rings. I should have not said anything, but to get her website issue to work I had to delete her cache, history, and cookies. She asked \"will that change anything,\" I said she may have to re-enter login information on some sites and \"you won't be getting all those jewelry ads popping up anymore.\" She says \"What do you mean?\", I explained how targeted ads work and that google just knows she has been ring shopping. She says, with a strange surprised and happy look \"This is my boyfriend's laptop.\" Very awkward after that, as I tried to finish helping her upload files and tried to not think about potentially ruining her boyfriend's engagement plans while she began to daydream in what I can only imagine was the start of wedding planning.", "summary": "Being an over-explaining techie I may have ruined a couple's surprise engagement. I failed my fellow man today."}
{"id": "t3_13xz1y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What interesting dreams have you recently had?", "post": "I was at a mall with 2 friends and i guy came up and began to start trouble, we got in to an argument that escalated to a fight. While i was charging at him he pulled out a revolver and shot me in the chest, that didn't phase me much so I kept going and he shot me again. We wrestled until he wasted the other 4 bullets he had left in his revolver. I realized since the gun was empty I had no other choice but to strangle him to death. It took me what felt like hours to get the job done i squeezed his neck so hard that it ended up looking like a shoe lace. He attempted to grasp some air so i tied his neck like in a knot and made sure I finally got the job done. Since I was shot i decided to go to the bathroom and clean up, on my way there I noticed my ex-gf that I treated poorly a year ago and regret to this day. I walk up to her with 2 bullet wounds and attempt to get her back by asking her out while she laughs and makes fun of me with her 2 friends. I leave while they laugh behind me and meet up with my 2 friends that are standing beside the guy that i killed and tell me I need to wait 2 days to get the bullets out since its the weekend, unless I want to tell my mother about it. I tell them that no way in hell am I telling my mother. I don't remember what happen after this because I think I woke up.", "summary": "Got shot 2 times, strangled a guy and tied his neck like a shoe lace then got rejected and mocked by my ex gf."}
{"id": "t3_12vh1q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is my girlfriend still immature, what do I do about this? I'm 20 she's 19.", "post": "So this is my first relationship, but I am a fairly well rounded guy and I feel that my knowledge of relationships without being in one previously is quite good. \n\nAnyways, I have started seeing this girl for about 2 months now, we are quite comfortable together, both physically and mentally. But so far there have been two red flags that I have noticed.\n\n**First**: Lack of common ground, I assume because the relationship is still quite new and I hardly know her as much as I would prefer. But I am a little nervous about this. I am hoping over time it will sort itself out.\n\n**Second**: She is still young in her head! I am in my second year of university currently and to be perfectly honest I feel I have become a lot more mature and smarter over the year and a half since I have started attending school. She however, took a year off after high school, went on a 6 month program for fun and is now working full time still living with her parents. Her \"plan\" is to become a mechanic but so far I have noticed her using an excuse saying she needs to get an apprenticeship before she can apply to a collage mechanics program which I feel is complete BS. On top of that she is still like a high school girl, literally watching tons of drama/soaps everyday like 90210. And her social life is really immature still, always gossiping about whoever, like these people bring significance to her life. \n\nAnyways the second problem annoys me way more and I am not sure what to do about it. I notice when I try and make stimulating conversation she just has no real opinion, or says quite silly things and I am left in an awkward position. I really don't want to be forceful or anything in making her grow up a little but it feels like I am just hanging around with some high school girl.", "summary": "Umm, me and my girlfriend have a kind of gap in how mentally mature we are, what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1utjjp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (26M) am having a really hard time moving on", "post": "My girlfriend dumped me 3 months ago.  We had only been together for like 6 months, but she was actually my first serious relationship.  We were best friends, and I became very emotionally invested.  When she ended things, it seemed out of the blue for me.  I still don't really know what happened, she just told me that she felt like we were \"incompatible.\" \n\nAt the advice of every single one of my friends, I did the best I could to ignore her and separate myself from her.  I found that I could only do this for so long (2-3 weeks max) before one of us caved and started talking to the other.  \n\nA few days ago she made a vague comment that I (apparently wrongly) interpreted to mean that she still has feelings for me.  We were talking a lot in the days since, and things felt just like old times.  However, I talked to her and found out that she is definitely not interested, so I feel like I'm back at square one.  \n\nI have no idea why it's so difficult for me to move on. I find myself thinking about pointless things like how much she cares about me, how much she ever cared about me, how happy she is without me, etc.  I feel like I'm just torturing myself but I don't know how to stop.\n\nShe also told me that she finds it hurtful / emotionally difficult when I stop talking to her.  I just feel like as long as I still want a relationship with her and she still doesn't, we're just on uneven footing and it's just hurting me more.\n\nI find myself totally unable to just cut her out, and since I keep trying and failing, it's just hurting us both.  I don't really have any idea what to do, I think my friends are all sick of hearing me mope about it.  I can't seem to snap out of it and it's really taking a toll.", "summary": "I can't seem to move on from my first relationship, and I can't seem to cut her out of my life either.  Any help or tips/advice would be appreciated, thanks."}
{"id": "t3_2vvoj7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23M] like my friend's gf", "post": "A little bit about me and my friends first. I'm 23 years old, kissless virgin. Never been in a romantic relationship. I don't have a problem with it, nor dwell or complain about how girls don't like me or whatever. I sometimes find girls pretty/smart/funny/interesting but I leave it that. I would usually comment to myself 'hey, X is interesting' but I wouldn't initiate anything. I do not have social anxiety nor I'm awkward against girls... I just don't care much.\n\nI have the same group of friends (3 guys, same age as me) since I was 12 years old. We have always been pretty close, we went though puberty together, and of course they noticed how I relate with the opposite gender. At first they kind of pushed me thinking I was just shy. Then, when we grew up a little bit (~16) they thought I was gay. Now they don't care much, every now and then they would make a joke about how 'asexual' I am, and that's it.\n\nNow, the thing I noticed is that I have always liked my friends girlfriends. Girls that I wouldn't care about much if I met in different situations I find way more interesting, smart, funny or pretty if I met them as one of my friends girlfriend. It's not a problem, since I know I won't try anything on my crushes, but I find it wierd and sparked my curiosity. Just wanted to know if anyone else go though the same.", "summary": "I crush on girls that I normally wouldn't if they weren't my friends girlfriends. Anyone else goes through the same?"}
{"id": "t3_2osxbk", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Medicredit collections showing up again on Credit report after I paid it off previously.", "post": "I will try to keep this short. \n\nJune, 2013 I noticed a big drop in my Credit Score. I had a collection from a hospital (They had a super old address on record and sent all bills there, I never received them. Eventually the unpaid bill went to Collections.) Since it was sent to collection I was no longer able to work with the hospital on paying it off. Medicredit was the collection agency, they allowed me to pay off half of it. I had to pull some money together, I called back and made the payment over the phone. \n\n7 months later I am pulling a credit report for a Home Mortgage I am applying for, It shows up as still unpaid. I contact the Medicredit, they say I never pay. I provide proof from my bank statement, the contact info was linked to their headquarters. I am told to email someone and they will look at it from the finance department. I do that and send a copy of the transaction info. I keep an eye out on my credit info, and it is removed in June. Fast forward to September, and it showed up again. I am trying to contact them again about this, but just get long wait, and no responses back from my multiple emails I have sent out. I am not sure what to do next. I want it removed from my credit. I paid it, and have proof. What options do I have?", "summary": "paid off collections, still shows up as unpaid, got them to remove it, pops back up on Credit Report a few months after."}
{"id": "t3_1ih0p2", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by Restarting my Computer", "post": "I'm in Afghanistan, and been here for almost three months. I was happily torrenting old shows and old computer games converted to run on my 2010 Macbook Pro, and up until yesterday it was running like a champ. \n\nNow last night, my computer was running a little slow, with the spinning beachball coming up almost every time I moved the mouse, so I say to myself, \"meh, I need to go to sleep anyway. Maybe a solid restart will do the computer some good.\" Fast forward to today, I try booting up my Mac several times to no avail; it freezes at the apple logo and grey screen. So I boot up in safe mode. I get an error on startup and Google it using my phone.\n\nMy hard drive failed.\n\nFanfuckingtastic. I'm in buttfucknowhere with the nearest Apple store being a sweatshop down some random alley in China, and even if I wanted to send my Mac via postage to some Apple repair shop and wait for a month to get it back, I CAN'T SHIP COMPUTERS DUE TO THE BATTERY being a restricted item for international shipments. \n\nGreat. \n\nBut wait, I'll just reformat or replace my hard drive and reinstall my operating system with my startup disk. NOPE. My copy sf OS 10.7 Lion is back in a storage container in the States, and even if I order one, the data on my hard drive is irreplaceable meaning that I ABSOLUTELY need a new hard drive to avoid reformatting my files into oblivion; all my college files, resumes, projects, fan fiction that I lovingly and thanklessly authored, ALL OF IT COULD BE LOST. Fuck me for being unprepared and not having backups of everything, right?", "summary": "Afghanistan doesn't have Apple Stores or Genius Bars for people having hard drive failures with their expensive-ass Macbook Pros. I should have bought a Dell or Asus netbook to bring over here."}
{"id": "t3_22mbik", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[Update] Need some insight on a predicament. I [25/F] have been dating [28/M] for a little under 3 months. Found out he has a FWB [40/F] for 1.5 years. He said he doesn't see the FWB ever moving past just that because of different wants out of life ie kids etc.", "post": "Original Post [Here](\n\nI talked to him the day after posting the original article and without being absurd or obnoxious calmly and directly stated my discomfort and dislike of him not figuring out his situation with his FWB.  He restated his want to do it and that it has been on his mind to put it to rest but didn't know how to say it.  I told him if you are gonna do it don't leave the FWB with grey area or confusion. if you want to end it end it.  We also both restated that we see the two of us working out long term but he understood that I wouldn't be able to stay with him if the FWB wasn't put to rest soon.  I told him I didn't mind if they stayed friends, honestly. Just drop the WB part of FWB. After finishing the conversation we continued on with our evening.  When I left we said our goodbyes and I said with a nice but no bullshit tone \"Figure it out with her, please.\"   \n\nA week went by we were both extremely busy.  I saw him Monday night,  and he told me he called it off with her completely and utterly and that it was over between them.  He thanked me for saying something to him, because although he had wanted to call it off sooner, he said he just needed a swift kick to finally do it.\n\nI am glad I told him directly my feelings on the matter and then gave him time to take care of it.  And even happier that he didn't dawdle, but moved forward and settled the matter.  Now we can move forward as a couple.\n \nThank you for your feedback from the first post!", "summary": "I was direct with my feelings on the matter, he needed the motivation to finalize it, he called it off with FWB and we are happily moving forward as a couple."}
{"id": "t3_2ud7ve", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my friend [18 F] hanging out tomorrow - unsure how to go about it", "post": "So I have liked this girl for the past year or so. We've been nothing but friends so far & only talk online (we met once in passing but at the start of the friendship). She currently is in a long distance relationship of 6 months with a guy a few years older than me. I completely respect that fact & I would not want her (or anyone) to break up their relationship for me. \n\nHowever, she opened up to me the other day about how she's having problems & they argue a lot. I gave her some friendly advice about what to do. She then started to sort things out with the issues they are having. \n\nThis was fine with me, I'm glad she's sorted it out but I get very mixed signals from her. We have pretty deep conversations. The other day we were talking about how well we get along and our preferences in the opposite and we both sorta match each others' criteria. She also complained how nobody has taken her on a proper date before & how she's been messed about in relationships in the past...However, she will suddenly stop replying part way through conversations then either reply the next day or not at all. I'm finding it rather confusing.  \n\nWe decided we would hang out properly for the first time tomorrow. I really don't know how to take this or what I should do. I was thinking of going for a drive & then head back to mine for some dinner but I don't want to act weird around her. The fact this is the first time it's just me and her together, I want to give off the right impression; that I'm interested (or that I'm a desireable person to have a relationship with) but I'm respectful of her situation.\n\nFirstly, do you think I've misread how she's feeling? \nSecondly, how do I stop my feelings getting the better of me?", "summary": "Interested in a friend who is in a relationshipand hanging out with her tomorrow for first time. How do I give off the right impression?"}
{"id": "t3_xxr7g", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "updated: fight or not. This is just too painful", "post": "myself, 23m, her, 25f, relationship over a year. Moved in with each other from one city to another 450 miles away.\n\nThis is an update from this thread: \n\nI'm at a complete loss. I finally got back into town and got to see her face to face. She wasn't cold or mean, but as soon as I stepped in, she wanted to sit down and talk. It's obvious that this decision is hurting her just as much as it is hurting me. We talked and cried, everything. Even held each other for awhile during a powerful lighting/thunderstorm.\n\nlater in the evening, she started to get playful, or cheery. I guess to try and lighten the mood. Then she became angry, wishing the move was already over so we can move on. She asked for a back massage (like I used to always give her)..promptly after, said she could not sleep in the same place with me...so I left and spent the night on the couch.\n\nShe left not too long ago for work, gave me a hug and said sorry. I've already begun packing my things. She has a place on standby to move into. Just this one night back has been incredibly painful. I told her to just move out and move on. She doesn't need to worry about me or the apartment lease we're on. Hell, I'll even pay for her first month if it means it will be emotionally easier for the both of us\n\nI was really hoping to find a solution to all this, that we stayed together, but that hope is now gone. Maybe in the future? I don't think I should keep my hopes up at all. Been through this once before, this is the second time. I don't think I can bear another scar.", "summary": "Updated thread, varying mix of emotions from her, can't bear this pain much longer, and want her to move out and on with her life already."}
{"id": "t3_2mqgek", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by summarizing my thoughts inaccurately", "post": "So this happened a few years ago in grade 12 English class. We were having a discussion about bias, and the teacher asked for an example.\n  \nAbout 50 years ago there was a black community not far from where I lived which was demolished by the government for them to build a big bridge over a harbour. The city said that the residents were compensated by being given homes of the same or  better quality despite the fact that they actually gave them really trashy places, carrying them and their belongings in garbage trucks. When the residents complained, they weren't taken seriously in the media because they were black. We learned a lot about it in Elementary School, and it was the first example of media bias I thought of.\n\nSo people stick up their hands, and several people give a two or three word answer. I didn't want to be that guy who gives a much longer answer than is needed. When I was called on, I tried to express my example in the least amount of words I could, but it ended up something to the effect of:\n\n\"Black people not being as credible as white people.\"\n\nIt did not occur to me that I should have specified that I meant \"Residents of ______ not being considered as credible as white people in the 60's due to prevalent racism\" , especially considering that I was white and roughly half of the class was black. The room got really quiet and the teacher stared at me for a few seconds. I didn't think about what just occurred until my friend sitting next to me whispered, \"Acg, why would you even say that?\" and a \"What the fuck dude?\" from someone sitting behind me. Thankfully, I didn't get beat up.", "summary": "I summarized my thoughts as accurately as a stormtrooper at a rifle range and accidentally implied that black people aren't credible in the company of about 10-15 black people."}
{"id": "t3_2ihc7t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Age difference problems?", "post": "So, long story short. We've been dating almost 5 months. My boyfriend [25]had a rough upbringing and a very rough first and only relationship that ended in a divorce. \nHe's not my first relationship. I'm[21] actually a little younger and have been in about 4 (depending what you count as a relationship). His ex was super controlling so I really do my best not to be even when I feel he's out of line.\nHe feels the need to have these like little Internet friends flow over into our relationship. Like one of his online friends didn't like me and basically stopped talking to him over me. All of these \"friends\" are female of course. \nHe posts on several reddits that I don't particularly care for because of their content and doesn't understand why it bothers me. He is just complimenting these women and loves doing it. He's not trying to fuck them or anything that I know of but it makes me really insecure. I've never had a need for the attention of multiple people but he does. He basically craves it, whereas I find it childish. \nHe brags about being hit on and some of his past sexual encounters. I'm about 4-5 years younger than him but I am not less experienced and he always seems to throw the age card out when he disagrees with me. \nI'm very grown for my age. I go to college, work full time and still have a family/ social life. I've worked for all I have actually. So when he drops that card it is extremely insulting to me. Is it wrong to tell him to stop or leave? I don't want to be belittled because I'm young. Because honestly, he's definitely the younger of us two mentally", "summary": "my boyfriend treats me like a child sometimes and he's only 4 years older than me. I don't know how to deal with the situation."}
{"id": "t3_33n7w1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[M19] told my crush[F18] how i feel and she didnt really gave me an answer.", "post": "I know her almost 2 years now and we have been good friends.\n\nI recently told her how i feel about her, she just smiled and told me that she wanna talk with me about that after her trip to \"summer-splash\".\n\nI havnt seen her ever since then and we havnt chatted either.\n\nIm gonna meet her tomorrow at a birthday-party and i dont rly know how to react.\n\nShould I talk with her or just act like always(friends).\n\nI mean, i got this feeling that she likes me as well cause she just smiled and huged me. i generally thought that she likes me more as well", "summary": "Told my crush how i feel, didnt gave me an answer. Will meet her tomorrow and dont know how to react."}
{"id": "t3_25v9rp", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "So we booked our flights to Ireland... and now we're panicking... help?", "post": "Well story goes like this. Partner and I have been to Dublin several times to see friends and have a few parties, and were always told how theres some fantastic sights to see in Ireland if we ever managed to get across for a break (Blarney castle, Galway, Giants Causeway, etc).\n\nSo when it came around to looking at holidays for this summer, we figured we'd give it a shot, do our own thing instead of a tour, and booked ourselves some flights...\n\n...but we've come to a bit of a block. Pretty much all the car hire companies specify that we need to have had a licence for 8 years, and be over 25 if we want to hire a car. I'm 26, but only have a couple of years, and she's 23, but has 7 years. So unless we're willing to start selling some organs, we cant hire a car. \n\nThat leaves the public transport. But from what we can see, while the major towns are connected, to get to a lot of the best bits, you need a bit more freedom, which buses and coaches don't seem to offer.\n\nWell if we'd known this was going to be such a problem, we could have brought our car over. Problem solved. But the wonderful setup at Ryanair means that if we want to cancel our tickets, we're looking at about a \u00a3160 bill!! (They charge \u00a340 per person, per single trip)", "summary": "We bought tickets to Ireland, realised we screwed up, cant hire a car, but want to get around independently. Any suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_1gfpmm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[21M] struggling to communicate with my girlfriend [21F] of several years because of her depression", "post": "A little backstory: we have been together since high school, and have been living together for almost a year now. Both of us are enrolled in four-year universities and doing fairly well, and we've generally been a very happy couple with few problems.\n\nIt has been a couple years since she was diagnosed with depression and I've always been fairly good at dealing with it but since moving in together I find myself unable to communicate various things to her such as asking her to do more housework or take on a part-time job to help with the stresses that I take on working 20 hours a week (40+ in the summer) and being a pre-med student. I'd love to be able to completely support her, but I'm just not capable of it right now.\n\nShe knows that she should do these things already, but her depression affects her in a way where she won't do anything about it, and then will turn around and call herself worthless for not doing it, which furthers the cycle and makes her even less motivated to do it. \n\nOur relationship has always been based on honest communication, and has succeeded because of it, but now I'm afraid that if I suggest that she do these things to make the effort in our living situation a more even split that I will be making her feel worthless and damaging her ability to succeed. But I now feel that there is a wall between us as I can't say how I am actually feeling, and it is affecting my passion for the relationship.\n\nHow would you suggest I go about communicating these things to her without hurting her or at least as little as possible?", "summary": "I want to ask my SO to try to do more around the house and try harder to get a job, but her depression makes me fear I might hurt her."}
{"id": "t3_exkmx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I ask someone who has been messaging me who they are?", "post": "I received a few text messages from someone claiming to be Stephanie. However, I cant remember meeting her or giving out my number (should be noted that alcohol would have been at play). \n\nIve asked my pals no one is sure who she is or at what point I would have met her. There was three times that I could have met her and gave my number out, Christmas eve and twice in pub after going to two games of football.  \n\nI've messaged her back a few times but still don't have a clue who she could be. What is the best way to ask her who she is and how I know her.\n\nWill be going to bed shortly so will respond in the morning. \n\nCheers", "summary": "Received a phone text message, replied to many times now for me to ask where I met her and who she is. What's best way of identifying her?"}
{"id": "t3_33h7ll", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [20] is offended because I [M-19] wouldn't be attracted to her IF she was overweight... help!", "post": "Ok my girlfriend texted me asking whether I'd be attracted to her **IF** she was fat. [Conversation] I'm not attracted to fat women, she knows this because I've never dated anyone fat, I'm not fat and above all, SHE isn't fat. \n\nI've told her before that I would love her but I wouldn't be sexually or physically attracted to her because I don't like fat women. She got upset, saying I'm shallow. I'm not shallow, there's nothing wrong with not being attracted to fat women, at all. It's just who I am. \n\nShe then went on to say that I should be because she's still the same person and my reply would simply be that it's not always the personality that counts, you have to be attracted to somebody who looks good to you and if you were fat, you wouldn't look good to me.\n\nBut one point you guys have to understand is that my girlfriend is not fat, she is nowhere near. She's absolutely fine in my eyes.\n\nHow can I deal with this?!", "summary": "My girlfriend asks me every 3-4 months or so (pattern) if I'd be attracted to her if she was overweight, how do I deal with her so that I don't sound horrible?"}
{"id": "t3_rjuqw", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "BF still talks about his ex.", "post": "So I've been dating this guy for over a month, hasn't introduced me to his friends, and every time we hang out it leads to sex. He says that is just his way of showing his \"like\" for me. Here is where my mind becomes boggled. Whenever I try to do something sweet or caring for him he compares it to his ex. He tells me they don't talk anymore but I know for sure that is a lie. When someone sends him a text he hides it or the expression on his face changes to automatic \"Please don't let her find out.\" I feel like we are fuck buddies with a stupid boyfriend/girlfriend title. What would you do in this situation?", "summary": "BF talks about his ex a lot. Doesn't give the emotional part of the relationship I crave. No introduction to friends. (Am I just a fuckbuddy on the side?)"}
{"id": "t3_2ybosu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] crushing on a good friend [16 F], need some guidance.", "post": "I'll keep this post short. I've known this girl, Sarah, for a long time - over 5 years now. We're in the same classes and we both do extracurricular activities that keep us busy. We talk often about school, work, and personal stuff. Although we're both kind of shy, I feel like I can trust talking to her about a lot of things I keep everyone else shut out from, and she does the same. I like to think that she has a thing for me, because over the past few months I've developed feelings for her. She's just a really outstanding, mature, all-around beatiful person and we have a lot in common. However, I've never been in a romantic relationship (she's single).\n\nMy worry is that I might be getting the wrong signals from her - we've been great friends for a long time and I don't want to do anything to risk that. I really need help with how I can approach telling her how I feel about her without endangering our friendship. Please point me in the right direction!", "summary": "I have a crush on a girl I've known for over 5 years. How can I tell her about my feelings without ruining our friendship?"}
{"id": "t3_zz1cc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/f] I think I'm friend-zoning my best friend. (20/m) What do I do?", "post": "So we've been good friends for almost 9 months and talk A LOT. Mostly online, but we hang out in person when we get the chance and we chatted on the phone a bit over the summer. However, sometimes stuff he has said has made me wonder if he actually likes me, or he's gotten more comfortable with the fact we're friends and isn't afraid of me misunderstanding. And before you ask, yes, we have actually talked about what happened if unreciprocated crushing/love were to occur, and we basically agreed that we can't really predict what may or may not have in the future. However, neither of us want to lose the other's friendship, so if this situation were to occur, I assume no one would confess.\n\nBut now I think this may actually be happening. If it is, what do I do? Do I pull away and give him space so he can get over me (because I do not foresee myself anytime wanting to be with him)? Do I confront him? I really think I'm just going to ignore it and let him do what he wants. If he doesn't want to confess and just go on as everything's normal, then I will too. I don't want to screw up our friendship, and he's strong enough to handle this, I think. But what do you guys think?", "summary": "My best friend may have a crush on me, but he knows I'm not attracted to him nor wish to date him. If he does like me, should I do something about it?"}
{"id": "t3_y01kf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "M(26) discovered F(26) is going to move across country in a year, we're 2 weeks into a 1 year lease.", "post": "Title says most all of it.\n\nWe've been together for about 15 months, just moved in together for the first time 2 weeks ago. We've discussed marriage & kids in the not-too-distant past, but no definite plans. \n\nShe's had trouble finding a career-type job, and in the past has mentione applying to out-of-state jobs (I was not pleased at the notion). I would have no problem considering a move out-of-state myself, but next week I start a 3 year program at school.\n\nShe doesn't know I know about her plans to move - I just discovered them less than an hour ago, & am probably still in shock. I'm not proud of how I found out, & would prefer *not* to admit it to her. I checked her cell phone & saw a text -- a violation of trust? No doubt, but so is making plans like this.\n\nI know her mother & father did the long-distance thing for a while -- her mom is a very driven woman, who seems to put her career first. In fact, I know her mom wasn't around a lot when she was younger, because she was so busy with work. For me, priorities on this front are clear cut: family first, & at this point, I am (was?) considering her family. A long distance relationship would be very hard on me, especially for a year (or two)... I would probably be an emotional wreck.\n\nI'm looking for any advice. I thought this was going to be my last committed relationship, now I don't know what to think. I love her, but for her to make long term plans like this & keep me in the dark... Plus, we have 11 1/2 months left on our lease. Do I play dumb & wait to see when she decides she'll tell me? Do I let sleeping dogs lie (she's pretty flighty with plans sometime, and 11 months is a long time to change your mind).", "summary": "I discovered my girlfriend is planning to move across country in a year, we're 2 weeks into a 1 year lease."}
{"id": "t3_21ruf1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with [20 M] - 8 weeks - he seems to be losing interest and not replying to my texts", "post": "I'd just like your opinions on what to do with this one...I'm 20, gay, and probably close to the end of something vaguely resembling my first relationship...which involved lots of things like first ever date, first kiss etc. \n\nMet him on my course at university, things progressed a bit and he seemed quite keen but the last 3 weeks we havent gone on a date or anything - I've asked numerous times if he wants to come round or go somewhere or anything and he's made excuses every time. I've seen him at university in lectures a few times since but even there it seems like he's consciously tried to avoid me. And when I have seem him he's seemed distant and just spent the time looking at his phone. \n\nRecently when I've been texting him he hasnt responded at times for like 2 days and I've had to ask \"did you get my text?\" and things to get a response. I invited him round again yesterday to see if he wanted to spend the night at mine and we'd go into university together the next day and he hasnt responded at all even though it was originally his idea that never ended up happening. It would help if I even knew what I'd done wrong because nothing in particular comes to mind. We had a nice time at the cinema a few weeks ago and since then its felt like he's gradually trying to distance himself.\n\nI dont think it's even anything to do with me being too clingy or anything - which I thought might possibly happen - when I look back at the texts from last month he always replied quickly and we seemed to be getting on well. Can anyone give me any advice with regards as to what to do? I have to go home next week for the holidays and I'll be so depressed if I cant see him before then or sort things out.", "summary": "been seeing a guy who seems to be gradually distancing himself and losing interest in me while I've fallen quite hard for him, what can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_28riqy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I heard it's taboo to ask Baristas out. But i [20/f] want to ask a female Barista [19-23?/f] to chill sometime. As friends. Is this something i could do?", "post": "Hello! \n\nSo to make this short and sweet, recently i've been going this busy coffee shop every morning, or at least 5 days a week. The same girl always helps me. She is very friendly and remembers my order. She is about my age, as well. She asks me about life and usually talks with me for a while before i leave. \n\nIt seems like more than just regular small talk, she actually seems interested and sometimes even gets yelled at for talking too long with me. \n\nI know it's frowned upon to ask Baristas out because they basically are always really friendly and most people think they're being personable when they aren't. But this girl seems totally chill and we really get along well. I would love to have another friend to hang out with and she obviously lives in my town. \n\nMy question is, should i bring this up to her? Or will i still be laughed at for thinking a Barista actually had any interest in me? Also, if this is something i could actually do, how should i phrase it. Thanks!", "summary": "Friendly female barista that's about my age seems like she'd be fun to hang out with. Always talks to me about life and remembers my order. Is asking her to hang out weird?"}
{"id": "t3_1prkra", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my close friend of 4 years [19 F] I'm gay, but I can't stock thinking about her", "post": "So here's the deal, I'm a 20 year old closeted gay guy. I'm 100% sure I'm gay, and have been with a bunch of guys. I met this girl in high school around 4 years ago, and we've been extremely close friends ever since. Nothing remotely sexual ever happened between us because I honestly was very uninterested. \n\nI was very happy with the way our friendship was going, we talked a lot, texted a lot, hung out almost at least once a week since we met, but nothing sexual at all. Keep in mind she has no idea I'm gay, no one does. Lately, I've been having weird thoughts about her. I've never felt like this towards any other girl in my life ever before, It's not the crazy blinding sexual attraction I feel for guys, but I'm definitely attracted to her, and I'm very much in love. I can easily see myself giving up the idea of being gay (and all of its fun and pleasure) to be with her and to make her happy.\n\n I get very jealous when I sense a guy flirting with her, and I think she's starting to sense it. A lot of our mutual friends know that there's some tension between us, and I've been asked a lot by many people if there's anything going on between us.\n\nI'm relatively attractive, have no problems attracting guys at all, and so is she. It's crazy how much we think alike, and how close we've become without having anything sexual. I'm really confused as to why I'm having all these feelings, and I don't really know what to do. She's the most wonderful person I've ever known, and I have so many conflicting thoughts going on in my head, nothing is clear and I'm completely lost. \n\nWhy do I feel the way I do towards her? Why can't I just learn how to be straight and live my life being happy with her?", "summary": "I'm gay guy who would go straight for my friend whom I'm in love with (I know, I know)"}
{"id": "t3_kg46v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, do I let this go?  Or do I call my boss out on her unprofessional behavior?", "post": "So, I'll try to keep this short.   Basically I'm a sales rep that handles media items for several local retailers.  We usually do each store in pairs, and the woman that is at one of my stores with me is simply incompetent.  Not stupid or unwilling, just bad at the job.  So, we have a big assignment today (the store wanted a scanned inventory of our product) and it was going to take all day.  However, when this woman was at this store yesterday (my day off) she did nothing.  We had to spend the first half of the day playing catch-up before we could even get to taking inventory (seriously, one could not start without the other).  So, she leaves at her scheduled time, and I call my boss to ask if I can stay and complete the inventory.  She says of course, as it has to get submitted today.  \n\nCut to 4 hours later (I was in that store for over 12 hours total), and I'm finally finished.  I send a text to let my boss know I'm done, and shit hits the fan.  \n\nShe is literally *screaming* at me over the phone, accusing me of being inexperienced and unprofessional (for the job taking four hours more than it should).  I let her vent and then explain the fact that had yesterday's job been done correctly, I could have finished much sooner.  I also explained that the inventory is, classically a two-person job yet my co-worker refused to help (she had other priorities, apparently).  \n\nEventually I manage to talk my way out of the shit, but I'm still really put off by her unprofessional and accusatory tone, let alone her readiness to jump to conclusions.  \n\nSo, do I let this go?  Do I talk to her about it further?  I really don't know if I can trust her anymore, if only because she seems unwilling to apologize.", "summary": "Boss loses her shit on me for no reason.  Do I call her out on her bad attitude, or let it go?"}
{"id": "t3_rpnux", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Okay reddit, help me deal with my insanely annoying neighbors in a manner that is both legal and effective.", "post": "So, I have some neighbors.  They are not bad people per se, but they have a few habits I'd like to break as they annoy the living shit out of me and everyone else in the vicinity.\n\n-They have an ever-changing array of SUVs parked in the driveway, the grass, and at odd angles in the street.  There are something like 10 adults in the house and there's a car for each of them most of the time.\nParking on the grass is obviously against county code, but a complaint gets a code guy out in oh, say....two months and usually in the middle of the day when they're all at work so whoever is home just pleads innocence and that's the end of that.  \n\n-Apparently, they have some kind of law that each SUV shall be equipped with a sound system capable of producing bass reaching into the infrasonic spectrum.  If they are in one of the vehicles, the music is on and the bass is rattling my windows.  Washing the car?  Turn up the bass.  Sitting on the front porch?  Bass!  Car in the driveway and nobody's even outside?  BASS!  I and others have spoken to them about this on more than one occasion, but they seem to forget these conversations after a month or so and go back to cranking the oompa music.\n\n-They also drive like idiots even though we're in a residential area with no sidewalks and the streets are often full of adults and kids.  They've been talked to about this, but again with the short/selective memory.", "summary": "My neighbors have a shitload of cars, park them all over the place, blast bass-heavy music at all hours, and drive like retards.  They do not respond to polite requests to quit being retards."}
{"id": "t3_h2xk0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My choir raised money a while back to help Japan, and now I need to find an org. to send it to.  Ideas?", "post": "A month or so ago, my college a cappella choir raised money to help Japan.  Being the terrible Treasurer that I am (I only got the job because I happened to be holding all the money we had in my dorm when we had \"elections\"), it took me forever to get the funds organized enough to be able to donate the money.  And now school is out for the season, so the choir isn't currently meeting, meaning I have to figure out where this money we raised is going to go.\n\nSo, reddit, I have come to you.  I asked everyone in the choir where they wanted the money to go, but no one responded, and, since I'm not sure I know what I'm doing, I need help finding the right organization.  I don't really know where to start, and, even when I think I've found a good organization, I'm worried I'm going to choose one that is fake, doesn't distribute its funds \"properly,\" discriminates, etc.\n\nSo, does anyone have any ideas?", "summary": "I suck with money-related things and need help finding an organization to donate money to the Japan relief for my choir."}
{"id": "t3_3xdjk5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] with my boyfriend [19 M ] 3.5 years, when is it time to let go? with line breaks. **tl;dr**: Mandatory summary/question!", "post": "Okay, so I've never really posted anything before, so sorry if this is weird or I'm not doing it right or something. \n\nI started dating my current BF when I was 15 and a sophomore in high school, he was 16 and a junior. Now we are both in college. We are insanely close. Like spend literally ALL our time together. He is incredibly important to me and we do everything together. I love him a lot and I have incredible respect for him as a person. \n\nThe problem is we both don't have friends outside of the relationship. \n\nI mean we both have friends. We have a lot of friends really, but we just don't feel like we connect with anyone other than each other anymore. It's hard to explain. \n\nWe both ditched all of our friends from high school. Some of it was because of our relationship, but a lot of it was high school is shitty. \n\nI've made tons of new friends this year at university but I just don't feel like i connect with any of them. Everything feels really forced and I'm constantly paranoid that they don't really like me even though they all tell me they love hanging out with me all of the time. \n\nI know that my boyfriend and I probably need to break up, for a lot of reasons I won't bother posting here, but I feel like I can't do it because then I will have no friends. (Like friends I actually connect with and enjoying being around.)\n\nI guess what I'm really wondering and trying to get at here is if anyone else has expressed something like this? I love my SO, but we have been together since I was 15 and I know its time to move on, I'm just scared because I don't feel like I'll ever connect with anyone again.", "summary": "College girl knows it's time to move on from high school sweetheart, but doesn't feel like she connects with anyone anymore and is scared to breakup."}
{"id": "t3_1w4n24", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[M/30] having a hard time dealing jealously issues (F/35) especially when she fabricates her own jealously.", "post": "[M/30] having a hard time dealing jealously issues (F/35) we have been dating for almost 1 year.\n\nIn the past I have had several long, horrible arguments about me checking out other females. When we started out as friends during several small talks we had she would always ask me what kind of girls I like, who I dated, how long, what they looked like etc. \n\nMe being honest I told her what ever she asked, not knowing she was really making an inventory that has been held against me since started dating. \n\nIn my case, anyone Asian, short, dark haired with dark eyes (she is Caucasian, blue eyes, and beautiful) is a direct threat to her.  In the past I have lost hours and even days fighting because of her jealously. \n\nAnyway last night, apparently some, dark haired Asian, came into the coffee shop, stood at the cash register, sat down near us (community long booth and tables) and payed her bill and left. Apparently I could not keep my eyes off of her, following her every movement. In reality, god honest truth I didnt even see the girl. In my mind she fabricated my eye movement and concluded my every breath to be stuck on this girl. \n\nShe said I was staring, and I simply asked her what she was talking about, she proceeded to call me a fucking liar to my face.. her jealously tends to be blind, with a lot of rage, with zero chance of having a rational conversation. \n\nI packed up my stuff, and left the restaurant, knowing this argument would last several days, or even weeks. I then proceeded to walk to my car. The night ended ugly and I dont know how to deal with these situations.", "summary": "Girlfriend is convinced I openly stare at other women (in her mind, she sees this), when in fact I dont, and I have no way to convince her otherwise."}
{"id": "t3_1oj8e9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [19m] asking for disaster by perusing this girl [18f] or should I wait it out?", "post": "I'm a sophomore in college and I met this amazing girl about 6 weeks ago. She's a freshman, she seems to like me, acts flirty, and we've hung out a few times as friends and danced (grinded) together on several occasions. My main concern is her ex. I should start by saying that I know so much about the situation because my sister is sorority sisters with this girl and they've talked. The ex is 1,000 miles away for school but they'll both be back in their hometown during breaks. He was her first boyfriend, they dated about a year, were saying \"I love you,\" he took her virginity\u2026the whole 9 yards. \n\nThey broke up the day before she moved out and the only reason they split was because of the distance. According to my sister, she (my sister) asked to see a picture of him and she had a few right on her phone to show her. She's also texted him since the breakup but I'm not sure how many times/who started it/what was said/etc. I really like this girl and we click, but I'm worried about this ex of hers.", "summary": "I like this girl and we get along great but she just broke up with her first love 6 weeks ago and I'm not sure if she's over him. Should I pursue her or leave it alone?"}
{"id": "t3_36ezmu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I[21M] be less attached, and become more independent?", "post": "Girl I've been talking to for the last 3 months said that one of my weaknesses was that I become attached and rush things.\n\nHow/what do I do? I know that this is ONE of the MANY reasons, on why she wants to take things slow. \n\nI guess until I can show her/she sees that I am independent and not super attached to her, and that I still like her just the same if not more. We won't move things forward with our relationship.\n\nShe still likes me a lot, obviously because we hangout all the time, and I just went to her hometown this past weekend, and met her fam, and literally all of her friends.\n\nI even admitting to liking her a lot and rushing things about a month ago by asking to be exclusive. Which she didn't want just yet. Because of her going off on vacation with her family all summer. (ONE of MANY reasons)", "summary": "how do I stop being attached and proving to the girl I like that I am not attached? I want to work more on myself."}
{"id": "t3_10o1a3", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I[18M] and my friend[18M] are interested in the same girl[18], and I don't know how to move forward. Can any of you offer any advice?", "post": "To recap, my friend, the girl, and I hung out in the first few days of college. I've liked the girl since 7th grade, and he met her during their orientation. I met him several weeks ago when I first moved in. I panicked when my friend asked me if I was interested in her and told him no and that he should go for her. I know that I made a major mistake here. The girl and I are very good friends.\n\nI confronted my friend a few weeks later after I learned he was flirting with her. More strikes against me, I know, but he was surprisingly supportive of my situation. He offered me one chance to ask her out, and after that he would pursue her.\n\nSince the confrontation, which was very awkward but calm, I have gone with her to a rally for Herman Cain, and have hung out in her dorm. It was really unclear whether or not the Herman Cain rally was a date. However, another one of my friends was at the rally and said that she seemed interested and was flirting with me.\n\nMy question to you is, is there a correct way to move forward out of the friend zone with the girl? I want to make the most out of my one shot.", "summary": "Told my friend I didn't like a girl, I lied. He gives me a shot to ask her out, and I don't know how."}
{"id": "t3_2b2cfn", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/m] Met an amazing girl [20/f] on study abroad who is too good for me, but I don't know how to keep her", "post": "So this summer I spent 5 weeks in a traveling classroom with 23 amazing people. I met this one girl on the trip and we spent all 5 weeks always hanging out. We kissed in our second week in Berlin, but never really went from their. It was mostly looking into each other eyes and making jokes with each other. \n I didn't tell her how much I liked her until the last day in which we spent the closest together after she told me she liked me just as much, which I was shocked by. We ended up drinking and getting drunk and fighting and she was telling me I wouldn't want to date her because she can never love, which I have heard before. \n\nI am usually anti-social wanting alone time, but every time I went to go for a walk alone, I asked her to come with and she did. We spent 2 1/2 hours walking back from the Eiffel tower, to getting lost in a small town in Italy. Every minute was amazing. Now we are back, we go to the same school but she lives 8 hours away, I don't know what I can do to make sure stays with me. She is amazing, and I just love talking to her but I don't know if she enjoys me just as much. We spent almost everyday next to each other. From sitting on a train for 5 hours, to getting stuck in a train station and falling asleep on each other for 4 hours. \n\nThe other problem I run into is her ex. While we were in Europe, she was talking to him and stuff and I think she still likes him.", "summary": "Met an awesome girl who is too good for me, I like her a lot, but now we are back, we are falling apart and I don't know how to keep her while we wait for the fall semester."}
{"id": "t3_1zp0ok", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A [18 F] really likes me [18 M] but I'm interested in her friend [18 F]", "post": "There's this girl [A] who I was friends with way back and we ended up going to the same college. Long story short, she ended up liking me and we hung out once. She brought her friend [B] who is also her roommate. Through various friends, I found out that A really likes me.\n\nI don't like A but I was really interested in her friend, Girl B. B is really shy around me but pretty fun when she's with her friends. I don't really know B very well but have been trying to use my friendship with A to get closer with B.\n\nI don't know what to do about A. She is my friend so I don't want to hurt her but I don't want to lead her on either. I also want to get to know B better but since A and B are very good friends, would I even have a chance?", "summary": "A girl likes me but I like her friend. How do I let A down easy and do I even have a chance with her friend?"}
{"id": "t3_2yt1pc", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Losing too fast?", "post": "Hi there, I recently starting counting calories with MFP and it has been great. It is forcing me to cook more (which I enjoy doing) and I actually like what I eat more than when I was eating whatever I wanted. I am a Male 6'2\" and I started at 255. It has been two weeks and the scale showed 242 this morning. I am worried that I am losing weight too fast. MFP suggested a calorie goal of 1740, and I have never gone over and am typically 2-300 lower than that goal. I also do 20 minutes of stationary bike on even days and weights/body weight exercises on uneven days.", "summary": "I am on the \"don't be fat for my wedding diet\" and I am worried I am losing too much too fast! (Slightly over a pound a day since I started)"}
{"id": "t3_2vjz2m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[30M] Just started having sex with my GF [22F] of 2 months (who was a virgin). She is having a lot of anxiety about sex.", "post": "I have been dating my gf for about 2 months. We just started having sex last week and it seems to be giving her a lot of anxiety. \n\nSome background: I am 30 and she is 22. this was the first time she has ever had sex. I have had many sexual partners. Some things she has mentioned is that she was surprised she doesn't have an orgasm every time. Also, that sometimes it hurts her. I tried explaining that both of these things are very normal, but this is the first time I have had sex with a virgin. Every time after we finish she seems like she is stressed out/full of anxiety/nervous and not herself. \n\nI am trying my best to be understanding, go slow, make her feel comfortable, but i feel lost as to what to do. I know losing your virginity can be an emotional thing, especially for a girl, but I don't know how to make this better for her. I have tried talking with her about it, but she doesn't seem to be able to articulate what is going on. \n\nSo reddit please help. Do you have any insight as to what she is going through? Any advice as to what I can do to make her more comfortable?", "summary": "Just started having sex with my GF of two months last week. She is having a lot of anxiety about it. Any insight as to what she is going through or what I can do to help make her more comfortable?"}
{"id": "t3_4i98my", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [29M] girlfriend [25F] got drunk and ruined our date night", "post": "This evening, my girlfriend and I planned to go out on the town and enjoy ourselves. We've both been working hard and needed it. We'd had the plans for about a week, but a couple of days ago, a female coworker invited her to her house for dinner. I encouraged her to go because I'd like to see her make some friends; and I stayed home because I wanted them to have their \"girls night\".\n\nAround dinnertime I texted her to have a good time, she responded with I love you, all that good stuff. Less than 2 hours later she texts me that she's so sorry, she wasn't going to drink and but now she's \"really drunk\" and will get her friend to drive her home. Did I mention that she is a hot mess when she gets drunk? Stumbling, slurring, falling down, embarrassing. And she can't control how drunk she gets.\n\nShe texts me every so often, but as our date is getting pushed farther and farther back, I start to get annoyed. She drunkenly texts me what's wrong, I say let's talk about it later, so on and so forth. Until 1:30 in the morning. I call her and she drunkenly says \"I'm gonna stay at her house and she'll take me back tomorrow I'm sorry I'm so sorry\". That's basically it.\n\nI'm so annoyed that I can't even fall asleep. We were really looking forward to this date. And I have to call her to find out what the deal is. Her cell phone died during the call so if I hadn't, I would have just gone to bed worried about her.\n\nAm I in the wrong to be upset here? How do I deal with her drinking without me in the future? Because it's always like this. It's really stressful to me.", "summary": "girlfriend goes to dinner with girlfriends, gets wasted, can't come on our date. Doesn't even let me know she won't be coming home"}
{"id": "t3_3duz3m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (18f) not really sure whether or not to interfere with my sister's relationship (20f)", "post": "Well, last night we were hanging out with these guys we met (they were like 18-24) and we had a good time, except my sister was really wanting to talk to the guy that was 18. (well they did talk I guess, and we're hanging out with them later)\n\nI felt pretty bad because he just got out of a relationship (it was over a year according to his friend), and when he told us about it, he seemed like he was wanting to cry but he held back. So I just felt bad for him. And back home, she has a thing with a guy already? \n\nNormally I would just let her do her thing, but then I realized she doesn't even know what she wants with the relationships she has (she admits to liking her ex (she saw him a few weeks ago), while having a thing with someone right now (from what she tells me it seems like he wants things to get serious: ex. inviting her to meet his family for his birthday last week), and then wanting to start things with this guy? Like I just don't think it's right.\n\nJust so everyone's clear, I'm not jealous, I think its stupid, but I don't want to get flack for being an ass...\n\nShould I talk to her, or let things happen and not say anything.", "summary": "My sister has a thing with someone already and wants to start something again with someone else, should I call her out or nah?"}
{"id": "t3_q6j4q", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "My Drunk Brother", "post": "Earlier tonight, my older brother was drunk. He was visiting my university for a conference he was on and I was hanging out with him. Because he's unfamiliar with the area, I was walking him somewhere to get some food. On the way there, he's starting random fights. No one is saying anything to him and minding their own business. As I'm trying to calm him down he starts shoving me and smacking me in the face. He starts yelling at everyone in the vicinity and threatens everyone. He then continues to shove me so I punch him and defend myself. At the advice of the bystanders, I just walked away. I was sure that he was going to continue to try to fight me. He later calls me and tells me on the way back to the hotel he was staying at he was jumped three times and goes on to blame me for it and argues that I wasn't there to help protect him. I can honestly say that I don't regret any of the actions I took but that doesn't mean I was right in the way I handled things. Were there any other options I could have taken?", "summary": "my drunk brother started a physical fight with me in public so i leave him and he gets jumped 3 times and blames me for it"}
{"id": "t3_2xkvh8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my boyfriend [25M] 8 years, he doesn't know who he is \"without me\"", "post": "I have been with my boyfriend for 8 years, we've had a perfect relationship. We have grown up with each other since the age of 16 and we are both very happy together. \nHe recently told me that he doesn't know who he is without me and wants to explore that independent side of himself, although reluctantly, so there's a chance we might split up in July when he moves to Berlin. \n\nI understand where he is coming from, but for me, I know who I am, I like who I am, and I don't think I'm going to be a better person without him. Do any of you have experience with these feelings? How did you deal with them? I don't want us to go our separate ways.", "summary": "Boyfriend of 8 years doesn't know who he is without me, wants to explore who he might be independent of us. Has anyone else had these feelings before? How did you deal with them?"}
{"id": "t3_1ufow2", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Is it worth moving away from home for college?", "post": "I am a freshmen currently transferring from community college to a 4 year university.  I did very well on my GPA and love what I am planning to study. I am fortunate by having my tuition paid for with scholarships. My only expenses would be room and board, and books. I live at home with my mom and sisters. I would miss them extremely but I feel leaving would help me grow as an individual. \n\nNow there is a local university close to me, I am majoring in physics and the local uni I feel doesn't provide as many options as the big name schools here. UT and Texas AM. That is another big reason for me to move on. I still feel conflicted as I love being home, but community college social life sucks. Most of my friends are 5-8 years older than me and have other priorities than hanging out with a 20 year old. I feel an environment with kids around my age paired with the distance from home would be a good experience. How nervous were you when going to college away from home?", "summary": "Does it matter where you get your bachelors degree? And is the college experience hyped up to what it seems?"}
{"id": "t3_35e5t1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by letting my \"friend\" close the door...of the balcony (NSFW)", "post": "Last week TIFU. Tuesday Night 2am.\n\nSo I was with my new friend with benefits in my apartment and we were wondering what to do. I asked her if she wanted to smoke a joint and maybe have some sexy time while high... She was up for it but she told me she doesn't smoke often and she get a huge feeling and I told her I'm the same.\n\nWe get to the balcony (I live on the 3rd floor) and smoke it and relax while talking... After 15 min or so, I ask her if she want to go inside and have a little bit of fun... She agrees to it and I go back toward the window-door. The thing is hard to pull... so I decide to go ham and try as hard as I can... but it doesn't move... You see, she closed the 3rd \"Window-door\" and this one need to have the little handle inside pushed for it to unlock... So we are trapped !\n\nShe tells me if I have any way to contact somebody... I pull out my phone and say \"yes im going to contact my landlord... hes going to be pissed but he lives in the same building so it should be alright\". At the same time, I realize I reset my phone to default the same day and still didn't put the contacts back into it... I also recently moved to the city so I don't have any friends to contact.\n\nSo we are locked out on my balcony, on the 3rd floor, high as fuck, at 2am in the morning without any way to contact anybody and we are starting to freeze (it was like 5 outside and we didn't bring warm clothes)...", "summary": "Was lock-out on my apartment's balcony high as fuck at 2am in the morning with a hot girl I couldn't fuck."}
{"id": "t3_1w5ir3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] miss [23 F] ex, but only after 8+ months of being broken up and seeing a new girl...why?", "post": "I broke up with my ex of 2.5 years last may (about 8-9 months ago) and although it was difficult I felt I was making the right choice - I needed to date around/experience other women, things we were way too stale (she can be really quiet and sedentary). We completely stopped talking ~3 months ago. \n\nI felt a lot better about myself after this, was really happy and even recently started dating a girl I am really into. However, now that I started dating this new girl, I have started thinking a lot about my ex. I find myself comparing the two and it has me missing my ex/romanticizing my old relationship. I have no idea why these feelings have just surfaced and they're bothering me. How do I get them to stop?", "summary": "Broke up with ex 8 months ago, haven't thought of her in a while until recently starting new girl, think about her/old relationship a lot now. Why? How to stop?"}
{"id": "t3_3u4yzu", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by sleeping through my one and only midterm....twice", "post": "This happened to me last Monday, and I still feel terrible.\n\nMy first year courses at university luckily landed me only one midterm, while my friends had multiple. Even better, this \"midterm\" was during week 10, so I had lots of time to ~~procrastinate~~ prepare.\n\nFast forward to the night before the midterm, I stayed up really late to study and prepare a page of notes we were allowed to take with us (it was a computing course). Once I was done, I couldn't wait to collapse on my bed so I set my alarm on my phone for 10  real quick and did just that (my midterm was at 11:30).\n\nThe next morning, or a couple hours earlier, I was woken up by voices of the janitors doing their daily cleaning. Groggily, I thought to myself, \"weird how they're so early today\" (they usually come around 11 am), and went to back to bed since my alarm didn't go off yet. This should have been a sign.\n\nA while later, I woke up again and felt my sleep had strangely been going on for too long, since I was only supposed to get around 5 or 6 hours until my alarm was supposed to go off. \n\nWith a dreading feeling, I walked to my phone and opened it: \"12:35 pm\". All the color drained from my face as I realized just how hard I screwed up by setting my alarm for 10 pm instead of 10 am.\n\nAfter thinking for a while about what to do, I decided to email the professor to see if there was anything I could do to make up for it. I then proceeded to take a nap to finish my sleep and escape my anxiety. I wake up around 3:30 pm and check my email and am greeted by [this message](\n\nI was depressed for the rest of that day.", "summary": "Set alarm for 10 pm instead of 10 am, caused me to miss my midterm. E-mailed professor about it, took another nap, woke up to find out I slept through my second chance."}
{"id": "t3_1tf9ol", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Legal and moral repercussions aside, what does Reddit think about the bachelor party ideas I and the best man came up with?", "post": "So I'm in the wedding party for a guy named Raymond. He's marrying his high school sweetheart next month. The best man and I are tasked with giving him a bachelor party in a few weeks and we're both on the fence for the direction we want to go in. Assuming money isn't an option (my mother died a few months ago and left me a sizeable inheritance), what would be the better bachelor party? 1) We get his soon to be wife (who controls all their assets) to drain his bank accounts and tell him she's leaving him just as we all land in Las Vegas. We decide to have a good time anyway and somehow convince Raymond to come party tonight and we'll head back the next day. We go out to dinner and we have a random woman at dinner near us (read: escort) lay on the charm with Raymond. Raymond doesn't drink so she'd have to be an amazing actress but we somehow convince Raymond to go back to her place to continue the party. We get to her place and boom, the door get's kicked in and her boyfriend and some other thugs pile in. Next thing we know, we're all riding with bags over our heads in the back of an SUV heading out into the desert. Long story short we're all digging our own graves when one of the thugs drops his gun (unloaded) next to Raymond and we all see how things play out as Raymond has little to nothing left to lose. The best man's idea is: 2) Raymond is a short guy and has been all his life. Due to that, he has been bullied his share back when he was in high school. The idea here is the best man and I would have a surprise for Raymond. We take Raymond to the garage connected to a house of a friend way out in the country. We then present Raymond with a high school bully tied to a folding chair (read: random actor with a bag over his head) and then we hand Raymond a gun (again, not loaded) to see how it plays out. Now this is a serious question but in full disclosure, I named the Groom Raymond after Raymond K. Hessel from Fight Club.", "summary": "Should we trick the groom into thinking he's a dead man or should we trick him into murdering his high school bully?"}
{"id": "t3_3s0mr9", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Bank sent a check that we put stop payment on. It was cashed and drained our account. Help!", "post": "Our landlord is impossible and has made paying rent to him a hassle. He received checks the day before they were due, but because they took a couple days to clear to his account, he decided they were considered late and threatened us with fees. \n\nBecause of this, my fianc\u00e9 and I have decided to send cashiers checks to him via certified mail. (Cover our own butts and make a paper trail just in case.) However, previously, we had an automatic payment set up through online banking which would mail him a paper check. When we decided to do cashiers checks, I went to a branch personally and asked for a stop payment on all future checks to him and then went online and also stopped the automatic payment. \n\nThe bank still mailed a paper check. And he cashed it. \n\nOur joint account (that we only have for bills and a tiny extra for savings) was completely drained, put in the red AND an nsf fee was charged. \n\nThe bank states there's nothing they can do as the stop payment was done to stop him from pulling money, not from us sending him checks. \n\nWhat can we do?", "summary": "Even after stop payment on check and cancelling an automatic payment, check was cashed. Bank claims no responsibility. Help. "}
{"id": "t3_gy5aj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I know AT&T is the devil, but can they legally do this to me?", "post": "I've had a plan with At&t for over 6 years now with a standard sony w580i.  Being in college, theres a lot of times where I need to jot down a not on the go and having a device with a calendar and that ability is ideal for me.  Now just 2 months ago I had the opportunity to upgrade to an Iphone 3GS from a friend for a pretty good price.  I've been using all of the features on it and am pretty stoked with its usefullness, but today I got a text saying AT&T has signed me up for a data plan without my consent or any contract.  \n\nI called them irate and have since been told I will be getting a call back from a manager with the details.  I feel this is literally stealing from me.  They went into my bank account and took the money without me even knowing.  The supervisor I spoke with on the phones reasoning was, \"well if you have a smartphone you need to pay for a data plan.\"  But I NEVER use it for anything other than music, a calendar, calls, and note taker.  That's like me buying a lawnmower and them saying if I replace the engine, I have to come to them and pay for doing it.\n\nWhat should I do?  I have the name of the supervisor I spoke to and his manager, as well as a summary of our whole conversation.", "summary": "AT&T stole money from me for a data plan without my consent or a written contract.  They are also satan."}
{"id": "t3_4j48sp", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Outrageous TimeWarner charge got sent to collections, credit score dropped, about to apply for loans. What do I do?", "post": "Hi all,\n\nI'll try to keep this short. \n\nIn 2014, TimeWarner tried to charge me $90 (which I genuinely owed them) but was incredibly stupid about how they went about trying to get it from me. I was a continuing customer, paying a monthly bill, but they never bothered to call or email me about the charge, which they ended up sending to a collection agency. After being contacted by the agency, I corrected the issue with TimeWarner. Seemingly issue resolved...\n\nThen, in the summer of 2015, I get more collections calls about the same debt. I investigate with TimeWarner, and apparently it was just an error in their system sending out the same debt. Caught it early, so no damage. \n\nThen today, I discover on CreditKarma that my score was hit (~800 -> ~750) and I had no idea why. Turns out that TW sent that was $90 debt to another agency in February, but that agency never bothered to contact me, so it actually ended up hitting my TransUnion report. Both TW and the agency were WAY less than helpful on the phone today, and I'll have to spend some more time with them tomorrow... but it will be resolved, at least in terms of me not having to pay. \n\nBUT, the real issue is that I'm about to go to Law School this fall, and I'm looking down the pipe of about $50k in private student loans that I need to apply for this summer (to cover the first year). I've still got decent credit, my parents will cosign, and I'm going to a great school with almost sure prospects of landing a BigLaw gig in NY, but still I'm worried that TW's incompetency is going to cost me $$$ down the road in higher interest rates.", "summary": "TimeWarner fucked up and it's completely their fault (I have recorded them admitting to 100% fault on the phone), my credit was hurt, and I'm about to apply for a significant amount of student loans"}
{"id": "t3_2ph4zk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] want to start dating a girl [17 F] who really liked me but we haven't talked in over a year.", "post": "Pretty much as the title said, I had a friend who very clearly liked me and flirted with me but back then I just wasn't attracted to her at all. The last time we talked was by text was during the summer of 2013, as always she started the conversation but it ended about 5 texts later with me just saying \"Hahaha\". I figured she realized I didn't like her and just gave up. \n\nLately I just can't stop thinking about her. At first I thought it was just a temporary thing but I've been thinking about her non-stop for a few months now. Now the problem is that I don't know how she would react to me just start talking to her out of the blue after not talking for so long and never even showing signs of liking her. I don't have facebook either so I can't use that, I was thinking of using Kik (a texting app) and I can just say I saw her there and remembered her but I'd lost her number so I couldn't text her.\nWhat should I do? Is it too late for this to work?", "summary": "Girl liked me, I didn't like her. Now I like her but we haven't talked in over a year and I don't know if I should start talking to her again. Don't have FB."}
{"id": "t3_14pt45", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "22f and 25m with different long term life dreams: one wants to travel and the other wants a career. . . what to do now?", "post": "We have been dating for three years and living together for the last 4 months. My girlfriend wants to travel and see the world; money, at this stage of her life, does not matter. I have just landed a great job that is quite challenging and I have enjoyed it so far.\n\nActually, that is the issue, this \"job\" is a career and my girlfriend is insistent that she only wants to stay in America, in our city, for two years tops. My goals, I believe, are more long term.\n\nI love to travel, but with my work I could never really be able to spend 6 months to a year living in another country (what job could). I am making great money so far, but I love this girl and do not know how to reconcile our long term differences.\n\nShould we break up now? Should we wait it out to see how we feel later? What do you think reddit?", "summary": "gf wants to live abroad, I think I want a career, but also love to travel. How should we figure this out?"}
{"id": "t3_31ss9f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my ex-boyfriend [24 M]. Together for a year, still can't accept the breakup. Really just want to write this out...not much help to be given.", "post": "I posted previously about my breakup and how I wasn't okay with it. It's been a week and I still can't find a way to be okay with it. I feel so empty and actually physically hurt. I am devastated to have lost someone so important to me.\n\nI have such a hard time eating and sleeping...and sometimes, it is all I can do to hold the tears in. None of these things are great when you have a full time job that requires you to be presentable and on top of things. I just feel so broken all the time. I feel like this was such a mistake and I didn't want this and I still don't. I've been through a breakup before (after 5 years!) but my outlook last time was much better. I was not anywhere near as sick over it. \n\nThis time, the guy was everything I wanted and we wanted the same things. I spoke to him once after and the things he expressed to me did not put to rest any of my feelings of unease and discomfort with this decision..although I am sure he is fine now, he has his big goals in sight now. But, I personally can't make it make sense in my head or heart that this is right...", "summary": "I know it's only been a week, I know moving on takes time...but I just don't see myself ever being capable of accepting this and just walking away like it's okay."}
{"id": "t3_1l3p5o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is sending my ex a CD with a song in it I wrote for him a terrible idea?", "post": "Just a little background, I am male (26) and my boyfriend (25) broke up with me about a month ago. We had been together for about a year and a half and he has met my entire family and we had been more or less living together, so I thought that it was getting serious. We didn't have any huge fight or anything but it was a bunch of little fights and a lack of sexual compatibility towards the end that did it. Since we broke up we've hung out and had a great time (and really great sex). He tells me that he's thought of getting back together and he misses me, but that he still needs time to figure stuff out, and he has started casually dating someone new. \n\nHe seems like he still wants to see me and have me in his life, but obviously it isn't fair to me to keep me in limbo like this (especially when he's meeting other guys), so I am doing my best to avoid seeing him and see new people myself.\n\nAlthough... I can't deny that I still love him, and if there were a chance that we could work things out I'm sure I would regret not taking it. I know big romantic gestures like in the movies usually don't work, but I was thinking of just mailing him a CD with a single song I recorded for him.\n\nI was planning on attaching a short note only saying \"I know we've talked a lot about us already, but maybe I am better expressing myself with this. I hope you are doing well.\" \n\nThe basic premise of the song stays away from phrases like \"i need you\" and is more about how I am thinking about him and that I'll be there for him in case he decides he misses me too and wants to be in my life again. Just a side note, I'm an amateur singer and he has sad that he really loves my voice in the past.\n\nIs this too desperate!?!?", "summary": "Broke up with boyfriend a month ago, debating on whether it comes off as pathetic/needy or sweet to send him a song I wrote for him in an attempt to get him back in my life"}
{"id": "t3_1zy1zz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Venting. My dad [54/m] is being a jerk about my engagement [23/f] and it's really awful", "post": "I just got engaged to my awesome boyfriend [24/m] of 2 years. We met in my last semester of college and are so incredibly excited to be taking this step together. My mom is thrilled, his parents are awesome and super supportive, and our friends and family have been nothing but kind.\n\nThen there's my dad. He's always been the type of father who's incredibly loving and supportive as long as I am doing things he approves of or need him in someway (which, growing up, was basically all the time. I was a quiet kid.) He is great with my boyfriend to his face, but when it's just me and him alone he won't call him by his name, asks me why I hang out with him so much, and says that I'm sacrificing my career for my fianc\u00e9 and that I'm going to just become another baby-making heifer (his words). I've asked him to stop several times. I don't even know where this is coming from - I graduated from college two years ago and will start grad school this fall. \n\nTonight he did something that just tore me apart. My fianc\u00e9 is foreign (currently back home for the month) and I skyped him and his folks from my parents' house. My parents have never met or spoken to my fianc\u00e9's parents. When I told my mom to come say hello, she went to get my father and he just LEFT THE HOUSE. Didn't say a word. It was awkward to cover for him. Then, when he came back, I was talking to a girlfriend on the phone and overheard my mom asking him to apologize. He said she couldn't make him do anything and he LEFT AGAIN. He called my mom an hour ago to say he was staying at his mothers for the night (not unusual, he's her caretaker, but still). \n\nI don't know what to do or say or even what kind of advice I'm expecting. I'm just hurt and angry. I don't know. This really sucks. I'm fed up with his crap.", "summary": "Dad says shitty things about my engagement, won't talk to fianc\u00e9 or his parents, and is making me feel awful."}
{"id": "t3_3eax8k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 M] asked a [UKN F] at work to go get drinks with me a week ago and now I feel she is avoiding me.", "post": "I work security at a apartment complex and for about 3 weeks there was this girl who would come outside to read and smoke. Now I got used to seeing her between patrols and she would usually be out for a couple hours. We started talking and it seemed we had a lot in common and would often spend 20-40 minutes talking a night. \n\nFast forward to last week and as she was getting ready to head inside I asked \"hey, can I take you out for drinks sometime?\" To which she said \"yes\". Since than I have seen her in passing 3 times and she has seemed short with me though still nice(like she didn't seem annoyed by my presence).  I also noticed that where she would spend hours outside in the place where we would talk, she now only spends a couple minutes there and than heads back in (one of my patrols has a view of the area) and I'll see here there from time to time. \n\nNow I feel like she's avoiding me, but I am concerned about why she didn't just say \"no\" when I asked her to go get drinks? \n\nThe last girl I asked on a date said yes and than pretty much stopped responding to my texts. (I asked her out face to face)., so I am wondering if my mind is just causing useless worry because of that. \n\nIf I ever see her in her smoking spot part of me wants to jokingly say \"hey, you're here, I thought I may have scared you off\" but I don't think that will be a funny way to address it if I have made her uncomfortable. \n\nAny advise/opinions, especially from female redditors would be great.", "summary": "would usually spend 20-40 minutes a night talking to the girl at my work, asked her to get drinks, she said yes and now I feel she's avoiding me."}
{"id": "t3_2xn06y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[18M] trying to get into get into a relationship with a [18F] with language and cultural barriers", "post": "So I'm a white american male getting in over my head talking to a girl that just move here from China. Normally she'd be waaaay out of my league, but for some reason she's been giving me signals for a week or two. I'm not unattractive in any way, but she's up there with the top. Anyway we've sort of been talking and giving each other looks. Turns out she speaks less english than I originally thought, but I'm prepared to work through that. Hell I'd learn mandarin to talk to her. I'm just not sure how to approach the topic of dating. \n\nThis is where the cultural stuff comes into play. I don't know what a relationship in china looks like; the pacing, little hints, the landmines I should avoid. (I've had another chinese girl, more american though, throw a 'tantrum' and didnt realize she was trying to be cute) I'm afraid of taking a hint the wrong way again and more importantly making her upset over something that seems little to me. \n\nI'm also not sure on how to get past fact that she doesn't speak english very well, even though it can be funny sometimes. \nI was thinking texting would be easier because I can write in spanish a lot easier than I can speak, but I wouldn't know if it'd be the same for chinese.", "summary": "we're both interested in each other, but I'm not sure how to start the relationship and what one would mean to her."}
{"id": "t3_4hdbp1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My(19M) girlfriend(19F) broke up with me just recently", "post": "Me (19M) and my girlfriend(19F) are in a relationship for about 4.6 years now. But then recently I haven't been in touch with her because of school work, and maybe she felt ignored that time, she broke up with me saying that she wants for us to grow individually (to become mature perhaps), and she said that I should give her time and space, and MAYBE when she is ready AGAIN, we COULD start all over again with our relationship, she also said that she would entertain guys who want to court her (why tho? I thought she still loves me?). After the break up she said she still loves me.  And when I try to text her or message her on facebook she doesnt reply. She's a really lovely girl, and I know that her guy friends are just waiting for us to break up just to get a chance at her, I don't want her to be with other guys, I'm really afraid for that to happen. What do I need to do in order for that to not happen? What do I need to do so she would realize that the break up is not worth it?\nI still love her so much, that's why I'm really depressed right now, I can't even do my school projects, there are instances when I want to die(well dying because of a break up is perhaps pathetic for some of you but you don't realize how I really love her). Help I don't know what to do.", "summary": "My girlfriend broke up with me, what do I need to do in order for her to realize the break up is not worth it?"}
{"id": "t3_25ea1s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] don't want my friend's mom[50'sF] watching my puppy but don't want to hurt her feelings. (short)", "post": "This is going to be short because there isn't much to it, I just don't like hurting people's feelings.\n\nSo my boyfriend lived with his twin brother and his twin brother's girlfriend (who is also my friend) at her mother's house for a few months because their parents are crazy and the boys needed to get out ASAP. Well my boyfriend and i got a puppy when he moved in with Mrs. Cindy (my friend's mom) and she's absolutely crazy about him, she loves him so much. \n\nThe problem is that she's soooo irresponsible. So many times she would leave the door open and he'd get out, she always forgets to feed her own cat, and she would never take him or my friend's dog out to go to the bathroom because \"it's too cold\". Well my boyfriend and I finally found our own place and have been living here for a month and next month the four of us are going to a wedding out of town and my boyfriend and I were going to put him in doggy daycare but Mrs. Cindy said she wanted to watch him and is now under the impression that she is, she's even texting me about how excited she is. There is no way I feel safe with her watching him for a couple nights when it's just her, he's still a puppy and doesn't even listen to her. What do I do?", "summary": "friend's mom is irresponsible and I don't want her watching our dog but I feel bad because she really wants to."}
{"id": "t3_2rwiht", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with my BF [31M], 3+ years, not sure if I need to tell the entire truth about my past relationships", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend for 3+ years and I have started thinking about the future and marriage. One thing that bothers me sometimes is that I have been purposefully vague about my past relationships and I don't know if I need to open up to him and tell him everything. We are both quiet, introverted people that don't necessarily share every minute detail, so it hasn't been a big deal. \n\nI was in an emotionally abusive relationship in the past, and had a couple of short-term relationships after that where I was still emotionally unstable. I did some things I am not proud of (breaking up by no contact with one guy, dated another controlling man and then kissed someone else so we would break up) when I was younger. However, I've matured and learned about healthy relationships. I've been in 1-2 healthy relationships before I met my current boyfriend. Most people who know me now don't know any of this, and I an genuinely happy and fulfilled in my personal and professional life. It's only when I sometimes think back to the past I sort of freeze up inside.\n\nI have tried to see a couple of therapists (one after I ended the abusive relationship, and one a few years after that). But both of them stopped seeing me after a few sessions because I seemed pretty well-adjusted and was capable of dealing with the issues. I got some good advice about accepting myself and having healthy habits (exercise, eating well, sleeping well, etc.) to cope, but otherwise nothing major. The message I took away was that the past is in the past and I should work on the here and now. \n\nMy question is, do I need to tell my current boyfriend the entire truth? He knows about the abusive relationship (not the details, just that I was in one) and that I was \"wild\" in my youth (but again, not specifically what). I am very happy in my current relationship, we are both supportive of each other, and this never comes up. Do I need to try therapy again even if this isn't really causing me any daily stress?", "summary": "I've been with my boyfriend for 3+ years, was purposefully vague about past relationships. Now that I am considering marriage I don't know if I need to go into much detail or just forget the past."}
{"id": "t3_3e2ahf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] have been with anxiety problems about having to face a guy [24M] whose ex-girlfriend I dated back in December. Need advice.", "post": "Hi reddit. So long story short, I dated a girl for a couple of months back in November/December, and I knew her ex. We were not close friends(or even friends) but had respect for each other, and we used to hang out in the same group of people. \n\nSo few months ago he saw me leave a bar with her ex, and then someone told him we slept together some months later. The guy deleted on facebook around March and I've been feeling a lot of guilt since then.\n\nThing is, I got invited to a birthday this Friday and he's going to be there. I've been facing anxiety problems lately, because I don't even know how to look at the poor dude(he's still pretty hurt, his ex is now dating another dude for 5 months now). I mean, should I say hi? Some of his friends are my friends also and I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to say hello, and I'm sure as well he's going to leave my hand hanging up in the air.\n\nI know this may seem a minor, minor problem by I stress out a lot in this kind of situations. I know I should have tought about this before dating the girl(wasn't even worth it). I'm also having second toughts about going to that party, but this doens't seem like a reason not to go.\n\nCan you guys give some advice on this? \nThanks for your time, cheers.", "summary": "Dated a guy I know ex-girlfriend and going to see him for the first time since then this friday. Having an anxious week."}
{"id": "t3_1xz67n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (20M) close friend (21F) of 8 years and also now ex gf (6 weeks). Can someone tell me what to think?", "post": "We've known each other for a long time and over the last few years became more and more close, She was in a relationship for about 2-3 years and when it ended, after going on a few dates with other people, kissed me and i reciprocated (I'd developed feelings for her before she broke up but kept them to myself). We later talked and agreed to make a go of it.\n\nFive days in and she wants to have sex. Being a virgin I say I'm not ready. I should add that she has known all these years that I viewed sex as something to share with someone when you are in a committed relationship. A few weeks later things were going great, she preferred staying at mine to going out on dates. Her hands went south and after initially saying no, I decided I was willing to commit to it.\n\nAbout two weeks after we got into an argument. (she thought I was angry that she wanted to see her friends without me, I wasn't and she wouldn't believe me). Two days later she ended it by text saying that it was too much too fast and that she needed time to be single and alone. She also said that we were never together and it wasn't a relationship. Of course this hurt.\n\nWe have many mutual friends and even though I was hurt I thought I would play it down and try and get back to being friends. She has never really spoken to me since and almost any attempt I try to make to talk to her she kills the conversation.\n\nSo a month later and a few of us go out, I find out from her friend that she has agreed to going on a date with another guy and that shes been acting out ever since she ended whatever we were. \n\nI honestly don't know what to think of it. She is acting like it has no effect on her but the acting out suggests otherwise. It feels like she doesn't want me in her life even just a friend. What would be your views and maybe thoughts on what I should do?\n\nI'm also having problems wanting to have another relationship because I feel like the process will just repeat and I will be used again and thrown away like a piece of shit.", "summary": "Long term close friend ended whatever we were and is now acting distant, pissed off and acting out since. I don't know what to make of it or what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_3jxt5q", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU my girlfriend's birthday by writing shitty code", "post": "Every single time I ask my girlfriend what she wants to eat it becomes like this big fucking grand debate. [This scene from the notebook pretty accurately illustrates us every night.] With her birthday rolling around I decided I should kill two birds with one stone...\n\nSo I spent a month building her a glorious app as a present. This thing is my fucking masterpiece. You give it money and it will go out and order you delivery. Thing is, you don't know what you're getting. Some guy just shows up with some food. You could get some pad thai, you could get a rare steak with a side of cat, who knows? No decisions, no problems. It was perfect, or at least I thought so.\n\nThe morning of her birthday arrived (this morning) and after some sexy time I presented her with her gift. She loved it, and after plenty of laughs suggested that we use it at her birthday party tonight. Her birthday party rolled around and a large group of us drunkenly placed the first order ever with the app for ~200$ of food. We were hysterical about the thought of what the hell would show up at the door... But after an hour I started to get a bit worried that no food had arrived. Finally we got a call from Pablo the delivery driver!\n\nTurns out I forgot one minor (major) detail: picking your address. I hard coded in an address I knew would get delivery at any hour while making the app\u2026 So while Pablo the delivery guy was sitting outside of 350 5th Ave, New York aka the fucking Empire State Building, wondering where to drop off $200 worth of Peruvian chicken\u2026 I was sitting inside my apartment in the middle of Kansas wondering how the hell I'm going to feed my 10 drunk hungry friends. Fuck.", "summary": "made a shit delivery app. placed order for gf's bday party. Delivery guy in NY, but i live in Kansas."}
{"id": "t3_1wclro", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/M] found out my girlfriend [21/F] is on Tinder the dating app.", "post": "She's sitting on my lap and looking at her updates on her smartphone, and then I noticed the Tinder app. She swipes to screen away to hide it. I confront her about the app.\n\nShe says: a) She didn't want me to find out she was on it because she knew I would get mad.\nb) She says it was just for fun and an ego boost.\nc) She did talk to some guys on it and showed me the conversations. The conversations were short (ie. \"Hey, hows it going?\"), she would never reply back or lead anyone on. So she has never met up with anyone from Tinder.\n\nI don't have the app, but I have an idea of what it is. I'm obviously not happy about this and the fact that she tried to hide it from me makes me even more unhappy.\n\nWe talked about this. I told her how I felt, and she explained herself. She deleted the app. She knows she is wrong. I still trust her.", "summary": "Found out GF has the Tinder app. Tries to hide the homescreen so I don't see the app. I confront her. She says it's just for fun."}
{"id": "t3_1j4yz9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[20F] am having some trouble getting over some stuff my \"bf\" [25M] did when we were going through a rough patch.", "post": "We've been \"together\" for over a year, and about 6 months ago went through a really rough patch. Both of us did things we regret, and he went a little wild with some girls at parties (nothing beyond nudity). Now we're pretty much  back on track, though he's not really ready to make any promises or commitments. \n\nTomorrow night he's going to be at a party at the same house and I think with some of the same people.. it just makes me kinda  icky inside and feel a little of the self loathe I did in the past. Any suggestions on how I can enjoy my weekend knowing and trusting he's enjoying his?\n\nI really love and care deeply for him, I just have a lot of preservation for my own happiness and health. And I want to make sure these fleeting worries don't get in the way of the immense progress we've made together and individually.", "summary": "How do I trust that just because the setting is the same, it doesn't mean the events will take place again?"}
{"id": "t3_ocpm2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is the most excruciating pain you've ever been in?", "post": "I'll begin, of course.  \n\nWhen I was 15 years old, I went to Ottawa in the summertime to visit an old friend of mine. Everything was going fine, until we went about an hour out of town to visit a mutual friend of ours. After we met with her and made awkward small talk with her parents, we left to get some ice cream.  \n\nOn the way back, my buddy started doing crazy leaps off of things (whether he was trying to impress her or just being insane, I still don't know), and being the impressionable young teen that I was, I decided to emulate him. It worked out fine until we came to this ditch. My buddy, being part orangutan, scaled it perfectly. I made it most of the way across, but landed on my left leg, snapping it. The sound it made was akin to a tree branch snapping, and very audible. I wasn't sure what had happened at first, until I tried to move my leg and couldn't.  \n\nThey called an ambulance and I was embarrassingly lifted onto a board and carried inside. The pain was so intense that I couldn't do anything but scream in agony at the top of my lungs, but not so intense that I could pass out. The next 30 minutes or so were a blur of pure writhing agony as we hit every bump on the way to the hospital.  \n\nBecause I wasn't 18, they decided to take me to a children's hospital first. They wanted to give me some anesthetic while they tried to pop my leg back into place. Let me tell you, children's anesthetic doesn't knock you out when you're a teenager, it just trips you the fuck out. Just imagine a bunch of Alice in Wonderland type imagery before you with the occasional jolt of unimaginable pain.  \n\nEventually they got me to a real hospital, put my leg in a cast, and my condition was upgraded from 'terrible' to 'not great'.", "summary": "I broke my leg being stupid in front of friends, was in complete fiery agony until I got to a children's hospital, where I was in a combination of Alice in Wonderland and immense pain.  "}
{"id": "t3_1kgoru", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [F] 24 make my boyfriend [24] feel wanted?", "post": "It accidentally came out that I had to force myself to have sex with him. Clearly he was upset. So how can I make him feel wanted? Or desired? We have been together 5 years. I can keep up with the forced sex but he tells me he doesn't want it if its forced. But I don't know what else to do.\n\nBasically the other night we were attempting to have sex and I wasn't really into it at all. So I told him to stop touching me. But then I felt bad and so tried to initiate sex with him. And then just pulled away from him. Saying that it wasn't working tonight. In the end I just told him how I basically have to force myself to have sex with him. \n\nNormally I just have to force myself when we first start doing anything and then after a while I start to not hate it. \n\nAnyway I don't know how to make him feel better about this. \nI also posted this on askmen earlier and someone said to ask on here.\n\nAlso can anyone please try to explain why you want/need/like sex. People on askmen were saying that it is very important in a relationship. But I just cant understand this. All I can see is that people do it for pleasure and that just makes me feel sick. \n\nSorry for so many questions, but i'll appreciate any advice.", "summary": "Told bf that I have to force myself to have sex with him. He was hurt by what I said. How do I make him feel better."}
{"id": "t3_1azov5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18F] am getting sick of my mom's shit regarding my boyfriend [19M].", "post": "I didn't want to post this anywhere else. I'm devastated. I'm absolutely frazzled over why she does not wrap her head around me being capable of making good decisions. I'm 17. I get it. But I'm not an indignant teenager. \n\nI'm in my 7th month of a relationship with someone wonderful. He is absolutely fantastic to me, treats me perfectly, and I love him with everything in me. I have a boyish demeanor and personality. I'm one of the guys. I could refer to multiple instances in which my status was confirmed, but that's not the point here.", "summary": "Is it in any way a \"red flag\" if my SO agrees that gender-swapping is fucking hot? Before answering, go back and read the damn post."}
{"id": "t3_1lue1l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What are your experiences with breaking up with an SO you still loved because you thought it was best for them?", "post": "I met my girlfriend during the first day of high school around this time four years ago. We became best friends and eventually started dating. We've been a couple for a little bit more than a year now.\n\nI'm a really shy guy. I don't have a really outgoing personality and I can enjoy my time alone. My girlfriend is very outgoing and she's already gone to a ton of parties and she's only been in college for 2 weeks. She plans on joining a sorority and everything.\n\nOver the course of her first two weeks in college, she's told me that she's turned away 3 guys already and has gotten drunk several times. But last night, she told that she accidentally kissed a guy while she was drunk on Sunday night.\n\nI try not to think too much about it since she said it was an accident, but the thought that I'm not the best for her keeps coming to mind. She has guys coming to her and she's always out and about while I don't really like crowds or flirt much. I've been thinking that maybe I'm holding her back from finding someone that's more like her and has more in common with her. I still love her, but maybe I'm not the best guy for her.", "summary": "I guess what I'm looking for in this thread are experiences and advice from anyone who broke up with someone they still loved because they wanted what they think is best for their now ex."}
{"id": "t3_1wzjja", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "23, graduating in may, question about amazon card and what i should be doing with my finances now", "post": "I have $2,363.74 on my Amazon card and have been making about $200/month payments. According to my latest statement, making $99/month payments it will take 3 years to pay off. I didn't know what I was doing when I got this card, and I definitely over-spent (my ignorance, they approved me for $2500). The reasoning for why I spent that much is irrelevant for this discussion. I'm wondering if there's a better option for me to pay this off, like transfer the balance to a different credit card with a lower interest rate than 26%.\n\nI've done a lot of reading on this sub and it's triggered me to get my finances into shape. I don't want to live paycheck to paycheck any more and the feeling of debt looming over me isn't a good one. I setup Mint last month and began tracking my expenses. At the end of last month I set some reasonable budgets and this month is my test run to stay in it. Before I was just flying blind, spending if I had money and cutting back if I didn't. What should I be looking into to make sure I'm financially organized? I've read a lot about roth ira's here and I'm really curious if I should look into that yet.\n\nI'm 23, 5th year in college. I have about $33k of student loan debt so before I leave school (graduate) this May the last thing I want is to have interest piling up from an Amazon card while I'm making payments on my student loans. I bring in about $600/month working an on-campus job while I take classes. I'm completely maxed out for work hours (25hrs/week due to the new Obamacare rules) so that's the most I can work / make a month.", "summary": "should I (can I?) transfer amazon store card balance to a lower-interest card, and what else should I be educated on at this point of my life financially?"}
{"id": "t3_2whex6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27M] with my Fiance [31 F] for 5 years, Thinks I work too much in school in order to have a job to support our future", "post": "We have been running a business together while I have been in school which has been great.  We make around 48k a year, but in Southern California that isn't a lot.  I am in school for a Bachelors degree which could get me a job out of college around 35-45k a year while she runs the business getting about 35-50K a year.  70-95K a year sounds good to me.\n\nThe problem is between school, my internship, and running our business I do not have a lot of time to devote to our relationship or I do not make good enough use of the time we have.  \n\nMy theory is when I graduate(in three months), I won't have my internship or school and can devote more time to my work, our business, and the relationship which has been great all along till now.\n\nIt is just now she is hating how much work I have to put into to something I am striving for (for the last ten years) where she already has a thriving business and graduated college.  \n\nMy goal now is for a corporate position making 300K a year(long term).  She doesn't think the work/time is worth it(seeing how we already make a living wage). \n\nWhat do I do before we get married to clear this up.", "summary": "I guess I work too much between school, my internship, and running our business and have goals that require time to build. How do I explain my goals to her or how can I use my time better?!"}
{"id": "t3_3lc17x", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(Kent county, Michigan) - Some questions regarding security deposit and court fees/dates", "post": "So I posted [this] about security deposit a few days ago.\n\nToday, my old landlord got back to me and said that renting a dumpster and moving things is considered a damage. Is that true?\n\nAlso, when a landlord sends the list of deductions to the tenant, those are projected costs, correct? Because I know the landlord has already rented the dumpster and spent the money to move items out. It was my understanding that they get quotes for all repairs and damages, then have the work done after the security deposit is all settled. Am I incorrect?\n\nBefore we moved out, but after they had given us 30 days to move out, they came and charged us $150 for lawn maintenance. That's something they had never done in 2 years living there. When I called to dispute it, they said, \"We'll just take it out of your security deposit.\" Is that legal?\n\nLastly, if this goes to a small claims court case, what are some typical fees that I as the tenant would be responsible for?\n\nThanks so much, /r/legaladvice. I really like this sub.", "summary": "Can a landlord charge lawn care (from before we moved out), dumpster rental and moving costs to clean out a house to the security deposit? Also, what are some fees associated with a security deposit case?"}
{"id": "t3_3ccivt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She (20f) thinks that sleeping with two other women is not cheating on me (20m).", "post": "Reddit I'm lost, she told me she got drunk and had sex with two other women. I told her i wasn't OK with that since it's cheating. She then snidely added, \"if you slept with two other guys I wouldn't care\" and I tried to explain that that wasn't the point, the point was she made a commitment to me and she broke that commitment by cheating in me. She still says it's not cheating because she was with other girls. Am I right in saying it's cheating or am I just going crazy? Also what should I tell her to knock some sense into her head?", "summary": "she slept with two women and is trying to say she didn't cheat on me because they were women. Am I right or is she? And good argument to get some sense into her head?"}
{"id": "t3_n0s19", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My brother his having brain surgery.  What would you do in my situation?", "post": "About 6 years ago my brother herniated his brain when weight lifting.  It was a long recovery, but eventually he got through it.  A few weeks ago, he started having horrible headaches.  At first it didn't seem like much, but they started occurring every day and he couldn't carry out any of his normal activities.  He has had a MRI and a CT-scan and it has pointed to a something called Chiari.  This means that part of his brain is pressing up against his scull and causing horrible pressure.  Right now, the only way for him to relieve this pain is to have brain surgery.  They will remove part of his scull, a small portion on the back of the head.  They also say that they have to remove the first vertebrae and possibly the second.  He is going into surgery Tuesday, December 6.  I know about the surgery and have watched some videos, it doesn't look too bad.  The biggest problem that I am having with this is the rest of his life.  I know that the first two vertebrae are important for head movement.  Plus the only thing protecting the back of his scull is skin.  I am really worried about his future.  I don't know how everything will turn out for him and I really don't want anymore problems for him.  I guess that I am just really scared.  Although, who wouldn't be?  Brain surgery is scary.  What would you do in my situation?  Thanks for any and all who read this!", "summary": "My brother is having brain surgery and will have part of his scull removed.  I am afraid about his future and any complications with the surgery."}
{"id": "t3_359uqd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Quasi-FWB between me [25/F] and friend [25/M] is doomed, right?", "post": "2 years ago a friend of 3 yrs started hitting on me, proposing a FWB situation and being very clear on the boundaries. At first I declined because I'm not very experienced so I felt like he could find someone else. I gradually became more accustomed to the idea so basically in the last 2 years I've been in a quasi-FWB situation. We fooled around several times but he was always the one to get off. He never pressured me into sex or expected it, which was nice.\n\nBut when I wanted to start fooling around more and was ready to have sex with him he was never in the mood or wouldn't respond. He's said that his arousal comes and goes for him, I think partially because of emotional baggage from his last relationship. It just made me feel used. Being sexually and emotionally frustrated sucks, but we've talked a lot about the issue without any formal resolution. Some things got resolved, but not everything. I felt less used because he was really open and honest and vulnerable with me.\n\nSomething that has somewhat complicated things is that I started to develop a crush on him. It lasted about a month and we talked about it. I am over it now because a relationship with him is unrealistic and not what I'm looking for but I do get a little jealous when I see other girls flirting with him (I usually just walk away in that situation). But as far as I know he hasn't hooked up with anyone since we've been fooling around.\n\nThis is just a mess of a situation I should just walk away from, right? Our friendship seems to be fine. But the next time he's in the mood, I'm just not going to engage. Because our relationship is really unbalanced and it's kind of not fair to me in my opinion.", "summary": "Friend has lower libido than I do and our FWB situation isn't benefiting me so it's not worth it, y/n?"}
{"id": "t3_qcx7s", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "On misunderstandings", "post": "Hello World!\n\nI have been around reddit for a while now (I lurked for a time, judge if you must), so I feel that I have a general understanding of how the hive-mind of reddit works.  I was checking the front page this morning before heading to work when my friend checks the page over my shoulder to see the post about Rush Limbaugh calling Ms. Fike (Women's health advocate) a \"slut\".  He is not a complete imbecile and rightfully finds this to be disturbing, as I do.  He then looked to the left and found that, at the time, the post had gotten 1919 upvotes.  Now I know that upvotes help good posts to the front page so that others may find them and join in the rabble, but it came off to my friend that reddit really liked the Limbaugh sentiment.  Any thoughts on this issue?  Install a \"rabble\" button?", "summary": "Upvotes on posts whose content is disagreeable makes it appear that redditors agree with or \"like\" the content."}
{"id": "t3_5109hy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is Boy X screwed?", "post": "Boy x (me) and girl x are dating, going on 4 years. We had an \"off and back on\" time abkut a year ago (relevant later). Boy and girl x are now happy, boy x got a job transfer to move to the same city after this weekend (labor day) as girl x while she finishes a master's. Girl x is super excited and picking out apartments.\n\nBoy y lives 4-5hours from girl x. They are friends. boy y is visiting girl x for labor day to go hiking, etc, while sleeping on girl X's couch. Boy y and girl x dated once during the \"off and on time\" but nothing came of it. Communication between girl x and boy y is roughly equivalent to boy x, maybe a little less (I mean, they are like 52 days in a row on Snapchat last I saw). Communication with boy x has dropped to almost nothing since (when I assume he got there, idk cus she never told me) boy y arrived. \n\nIs  Boy X screwed?", "summary": "Boy x and girl x are dating. Boy y drove 4-5 hours to spend labor day weekend with girl x while sleeping on her couch. Is Boy X screwed?"}
{"id": "t3_23f6h9", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I saw my crush today, and I talked to her. Now I need advice.", "post": "I'm 25. I've had a crush on this girl since junior high and i've always been too terrified to talk to her. I did however manage to talk to her twice senior year of high school but it was completely awkward. I suffer from social anxiety. Anyway I hadn't seen her since then (7 years ago!) because  I didn't attend college after high school. I saw her today and I decided to approach her because the regret I had for not expressing my feelings to her that I've been living with was killing me. So I said fuck and said hi. It was a casual short talk. She was on her way out and her mom was waiting for her so we couldn't chat much. It wasn't that bad. It was the most alive I've felt in years. I didn't want to creep her out by asking for her number though. I've been thinking that maybe if messaging her on Facebook or sending her a friend request is the next move. My mind is made up, I want to tell her how I feel about her. All I know is that I've got to follow my heart. Any suggestions?", "summary": "I saw my crush, talked to her and want to pursue a relationship. Just unsure on how to go about it."}
{"id": "t3_4io9ot", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My girlfriend was raped and it's affecting our relationship.", "post": "I'm gonna make this somewhat vague in the event she sees this so bear with me. \n\nI love my girlfriend very much. And 90 percent of the time, things between us are great. But we have a reoccurring issue of her bringing up me breaking up with her. Essentially, I broke up with her, we remained friends,  and we got back together because I never really stopped loving her.  During the time the we were apart she was raped in a situation she would not have been in had we still been together.  Despite the fact that the breakup was some time ago,  she still brings up how alone and hurt she felt every now and then. \n\nRecently she brought up the point that if I had never broken up with her she wouldn't have gotten raped and she feels this is the reason she can't get over our initial break up. She says she doesn't blame me but I can't help but blame myself for what happened.  I try to be there for her as much as possible and I realize rape isn't something you can just forget, but the fact that it manifests itself in her occasionally guilting me for our break up hurts. And I know she's right that the rape would not have happened if I didnt break up with her. I'm losing sleep over it and even though things are normally good, I just want to know if there's anything i/we can do.", "summary": "girlfriend was raped before we got back together,  I blame myself and she can't stop trying to hurt me about the break up because of it."}
{"id": "t3_33crro", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Advice getting approved for a student loan with a default?", "post": "Hi everyone. I'm utterly lost and scared shitless.\n\nTo start off:\n\nWhen I was 18, I left an abusive home to go to college in another state. I was told that I could get financial aid if I could submit my fafsa - but after multiple attempts I couldn't get it to go through because my father was blocking me in one way or another. I wasn't aware at the time that I could apply as an independent. In short, I accrued $18,000 in debt from that college which went into collection.\n\nI then returned to my hometown and I've since been attending another institution and received federal student aid - but I took dual-credit classes in high school which didn't contribute to my degree, but ended up counting against my federal credit hours cap so I was denied further federal aid and my appeal wasn't accepted.\n\nNow I'm in my last stretch of my career. I'm in 2 classes right now and I will take 2 classes over the summer and then I'll be able to graduate. But I need to get a loan to pay for this semester and the next and I can't seem to get approved because of the default. \n\nMy plan thus far was to finish college and then start paying off that 18k. There's no way I could pay that loan right now and still afford my living expenses.\n\nIt's been 5 years since the date of the default and I don't know if I should somehow get a loan and let that default reach its 7 year limit (because I don't think it counts as a student loan...) or if I should try to go through a debt repayment agency to get that 18k out of default.", "summary": "Made some bad, poorly-informed decisions when I was 18. Got an 18k default. Not eligible for federal aid. I'm set to graduate in July, but not if I can't get a student loan."}
{"id": "t3_4xaweb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [25f] being judgy?", "post": "Slightly fudged for anonymity.\n\nI'm pretty liberal, except when it comes to a few things. \n\nI pretty much keep to myself about them. They are just opinions that I've formulated after researching both sides for years, and what feels right to me. In other words, it is my personal choice to believe what I believe.\n\nI was in a situation this past year where my friends wanted to do something as a group. I said to count me out, because it goes against one of my beliefs, but that it's cool if they want to. \n\nWhen I said it goes against my personal beliefs, some people got defensive and got into debate mode about why it's OK to do it and so forth. Which is fine. I get it if other people want to do it, I just didn't want to participate in it. I know I could've just gone with the flow, but I didn't feel comfortable being a party to it and I feel like I'm allowed to make that personal choice not to be involved, if I don't want to.\n\nAnyways, since then, I've been told that this is being \"judgy.\" This bothers me, because I hate the feeling of other people judging me, and I wouldn't want others to feel I was being judgy towards them. I think that the people calling me \"judgy\" are just upset that I don't share their same opinions?\n\nAt the same time, I do want to take some time to reflect and see if I'm being judgy or not. Is there a better way to handle situations like this, other than saying you don't want to be part of it?", "summary": "Is it considered being judgy if I don't want to participate in something that goes against my beliefs? How do you handle situations like this?"}
{"id": "t3_2halz8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My Mom [F/4x] and Step dad [M/5x]. He's a widower and she feels constantly reminded of the past.", "post": "My mom [F/48] got remarried last month to my step dad [M/54]? that she's been with for about two years. He's a widower. His wife passed 6-7 years ago and he has been seemingly comfortable with moving on. The problem stems from the fact that he has teenage children. After their marriage my mother moved into his house with him and his teenage daughter. \n\nFrom what I understand, the daughter likes my mom enough but can't stop talking about her deceased mother. Everything in the house \"reminds her of her mother\" and she constantly brings it up. Because of this, my mom finds herself dreading heading back to the house every night and feels as if the home is not where she belongs. \n\nI talked to her briefly about the subject, but she seems very distraught and I honestly have no idea how to respond to that when she asked what I thought. Any advice? Thanks.", "summary": "Mom moved in with her new husband. His teenage daughter constantly brings up deceased mother making my mom feel unwelcome. (Seemingly unknowingly)"}
{"id": "t3_15nn7g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20m) need help understanding some of the cultural expectations of relationships my (f21) girlfriend has.", "post": "I have been dating my girlfriend for about 4 months now and everything has been going smoothly. She is an international student from China and also the first Asian I have ever dated. She has had some issues in the past with western culture but nothing I have not been able to handle and help her through.\n\nAbout a month back she told me that she find my text message conversations boring. Now these were just general text message conversations. I was not ranting and raving about random topics or anything. I took this as a sign that she may want me to be more flirtatious through texting, but I did not get a response from that. She found it embarrassing more than anything.\n\nI would just like to point out for the record that there is no issue with the sex life as far as I can tell. We are both pretty open about it and if she has an issue she will let me know.\n\nAnyway, when I probed her more about this texting thing she started going on about how I do not give her enough affection. She gave an example \"Like when you wanted us to be on the couch and watch films when you should be with me\" and sort of brings up how it is different to how a Chinese boyfriend would do things.\nNow this is where I start getting confused. In my experience, two people snuggled up on the couch is classed as \"being with\" someone and may lead on to other things if the mood is right. She would not give me a straight answer as to what exactly she wanted me to do with her.\n\nI would greatly appreciate if someone could give me some insight here. If it is a cultural issue, what am I doing wrong. It is sort of frustrating me because I have never had these issues in the past and her lack of explanation leaves me with little to work with. She wants me to take the lead and figure it out alone.", "summary": "Asian gf claims that I don't spend enough time/give enough affection to her even though in my mind I have. Is there some major cultural differences I should know about regarding this?"}
{"id": "t3_2zbbvs", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "I think my cousin is selling a bunch of weed...", "post": "throwaway since some family members know my account\n\nSo I'm pretty sure that my cousin is selling weed. By pretty sure I mean that he is almost undoubtedly selling. On his Instagram, he almost only posts pictures of big ass stacks of bills and huge jars of weed.  And buys super expensive stuff in cash.  He lives on campus at school in VT, but his permanent address is in NY. He also doesn't have a job.\n\nWhat should I say to him consequences if he gets caught selling? I feel like I should say something to him as his older cousin but I'm at a loss of what to say other than about what it would do to our grandparents and family.  I also don't know if i should talk to him or his parents since going directly to him would eliminate me being able to go to his parents. I'm at a loss.  I love this kid and don't want to see him end up fucking himself over.\n\nAny advice would be fantastic. Thank you r/legaladvice", "summary": "cousin goes to school in VT, lives in NY, post pictures of his huge jars of weed and fat stacks of bills on his instagram. at a loss of what to say to him/his parents"}
{"id": "t3_30toa2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (28m) watching the love die with my ex (26f)", "post": "I've been on and off with my now ex-gf for a little over a year. She's done everything she can to end the relationship, like traveling around the world for months and now moving out of the country. However, she always comes back. I always come back as well. We're drawn to each other like magnets, even though we fight constantly and are really, really not good for each other.\n\nI guess she'll be gone in a few days and this will all be moot, but its sad to see the love die. I've accepted it, and believe I'll be ok. I believe she'll be the same. We both love each other. But this has been going on for months, the love is dying and its sad.\n\nWe don't know how to not see each other. We constantly hurt each other. And she doesn't deserve me, but since she's moving, I want to see her and enjoy her while she's still here. It's getting harder and harder.\n\nAll I'm wondering, is if anyone has been through this before and knows how to handle it. In my life, I'm extremely good at doing things that are good for me, and avoiding things that aren't. This is the glaring exception. I have a weakness for her and for love and can't shake it. I feel ultimately powerless.", "summary": "Ex is moving, we've broken up, but can't stop seeing each other and hurting each other. Want to know how to be stronger with her and in love in the future."}
{"id": "t3_4g9dvp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my friend [25 M], friends for 9 years, rejected him based on lack of physical attraction", "post": "He confessed that he developed feelings for me over time and asked to date him. Basically I love everything about him (we really click in everytihing), but I don't find him physically attractive, (he doesn't turn me off no). Some people say that physical attraction can develop over time if you really love someone emotionally, and he actually kinda said that he didn't find me physically attractive at first but now he really is attracted to me physically too. He took it well, told me that it's not my fault, then asked me if I think this could change over time to which I honestly replied that I don't know for sure, but doubt it. After some time he clearly stated that he's not going to give up on me for now (maybe later when he'll be able to get over me), and told me that he'd like to stay friends for now if I'm fine with it. He also promised that he'll try not to suffer to much, but yeah, I feel him suffering a lot. \n\nHe also told that if physical attraction is really a deal-breaker for me then I shouldn't date him ignoring this fact (only if it would miracliously appeared). Now, I'm really confused, I really want him in my life, I actually started considering the idea of dating him, but I now feel like it will be unfair from me to date him like that. Also staying friends really hurts him, he doesn't show it at all, but I just feel it.", "summary": "Rejected friend based on lack of physical attraction, now started doubting whether it is really that important(for me)"}
{"id": "t3_3iy88v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25] broke up with my girlfriend [25] of 8 months and now feel horrible", "post": "I think I just need to get this off my chest and any comments would be appreciated. I broke up with my girlfriend of 8 months who is a single mother to a 9 year old. I feel absolutely terrible for a few reasons. The main one being I was a coward and never told her that I was starting to not feel the same way about her as she did me, or discuss things about the relationship I wanted to change with her. So the break up came out of the blue for her but for me I had been going over it in my head for about a month.  Now I feel sad, upset and miss her which I hadn't felt for a month. Is it just me being to nice and not wanting to have caused someone grief? I guess since I made the decision I have to live with it and let her go.", "summary": "Broke up with my gf but never discussed why before hand, now I feel sad and upset. Is this normal ?."}
{"id": "t3_48qcv1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I[25/m] am going to be moving in with a long time friend [27/f]. Starting to develop feelings.", "post": "So a situation came up a couple of months ago where my friend told me she was in a shitty situation and had to move in to a new place. She asked me if I would be able to get a place with her. I've known her for about 10 years and I trust her completely so I told her it would be no problem. I have always had a blast hanging out with her but never felt any feelings towards her since she has always been in a relationship.  However, she is now single and some feelings are starting to emerge. \n\nI know these feelings are probably simple infatuation but I can't shake them. Every day I wake up and I think of her. Every night I go to bed I think of her. We haven't moved in yet or set a specific date to move in but I feel that I should bring my feelings up to her before we move in. We will begin looking for places in the next couple of months and I don't want to make the living situation awkward by bringing it up while we are living together and screwing everything up. \n\nI just don't know what to do in this situation. I feel that it wouldn't be fair to her to wait until after we move in to tell her. But I also don't want to lose her as a friend by telling her about my feelings. I know she wants to move out with me because I probably feel like a safe person to move out with but I also don't want to drive myself crazy by keeping these feelings in.", "summary": "Do I tell my friend, who I am about to move out with, that I have feelings for her or do I just keep quiet about this?"}
{"id": "t3_16ixax", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "20k in my checking account, I'd like to split this money up into new checking and savings accounts.  What are some good banks?", "post": "So over the past two years I've been lucky enough to save about 20k.  I've got it all in my checking account right now. I'd like to move most of that money into a savings account to be sort of an emergency fund and move about 4-5k into a checking account for my bills and everyday expenses.  Then, once I have the two accounts I can tailor my direct deposit paycheck to put the amount I'd like to save each month into my savings account and the rest will go into my checking.  Does this sound like a good idea?\n\nI'd like this new checking account to be somewhere that doesn't charge me any fees.  Right now I get docked 2 bucks at most ATM's and get a 5 dollar monthly fee...\n\n**Some other questions and facts about my self:**\n\nI've got 825 shares in MTW stock that I'd like to sell and put that money else where, but that's a whole other question and thread.  This is worth about 13k right now.  I'm also going to need to buy a new car here pretty soon.\n\nI'm young and have been lucky enough to save quite a bit of money.  I don't know a lot about personal fiance so far though.  Would it be a good idea to go to some sort of financial adviser to help me better plan out how to save my money?", "summary": "What are the best no fee checking accounts?  Where is a good place to store my savings/emergency fund? Are there any drawbacks to closing a bank account, like there are with closing a credit card?"}
{"id": "t3_o3c7k", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why are most employers hesitant to hire males with long hair?", "post": "So I've been out of college for about a year and a half and was able to get a quick, well-paying job doing environmental monitoring for a certain ginormous oil spill in which I was basically interviewed and hired over the phone without ever meeting anyone face-to-face.  Since then the work has become less frequent and I grew out my hair (not super long but enough to put it in a ponytail).  Now, after job hunting for quite some time, I have my first major interview coming up and I'm being told by my peers that I need to cut my hair if I want a good chance of landing a job.  So....why?  There is absolutely no empirical evidence to suggest that people with long hair perform better or worse then people with short or no hair.  So is it just because of a long-standing societal norm?  Are there any employers out there that hire solely based on past experience and achievements and disregard physical apperance?  I know that this does not apply to all jobs but I'm curious about large private/public companies.  Help me out here, reddit.   I've really come to love my flowing locks...", "summary": "I have long hair and want a solid answer as to why I should cut it off just to make a good impression on my interviewer."}
{"id": "t3_jbwr6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need advice reddit, i think my cousin wants me.", "post": "ok so i am a 22yo male and my cousin is a 19yo female. i liked her for a long time. while i was working up the nerve to ask her out my mother started dating her uncle. they got married and she became my cousin. one day we somehow started talking about stuff and i told her about how i felt about her and such. she stopped talking to me for awhile saying it was wierd and we shouldnt hangout. my mother later divorces the uncle, so technically i guess not cousins anymore. fast forward one year. she randomly calls me up out of the blue and suggests we hangout. so since then we hangout all the time like three times a week. she has no problem changing in front of me, down to the thong at least, she always rubs up on me, while we are walking in public she tends to stand so close to me that we are practically spooning and always rubs her body on mine whenever she gets the chance. now as you can imagine i am at a loss to the solution. i liked her, i told her my feelings, she made it abunduntly clear she did not feel the same and didnt want to be around me, one year later she is showing many signs of wanting to be with me, however i am unsure of what to do because she has made her feelings known previously and yet acts the opposite. any ideas/insights/suggestions?\n\njust to clarify, we ARE NOT BLOODRELATED\nARE NOT RELATED AT ALL ANYMORE\nhowever im still confused :p", "summary": "like girl, girl becomes cousin, girl says doesnt like me, girl is no longer cousin, girl is all over me."}
{"id": "t3_1xft4f", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "19yr old. Looking to move out, need advice.", "post": "Hello, /r/personalfinance. I need some advice as I'm TERRIBLE with my finances. \n\nI'm 19 years old and attending college. I live with my parents but am looking to move out in the next month.\n\nI make ~$1000 a month (at $10/hour).\n\nCurrently the only bills I have are my cell phone and car insurance ($80/$100 respecticely). Well just recently I wrecked my Jeep into a tree so I have to buy a \"new\" one. I currently have $1600 and been browsing Craigslist waiting for a good deal. \n\nNow the apartment my friend and I are looking at it $500/month plus utilities (~$200/month according to a friend already living in the complex). My college is paid for by financial aid so I don't have to worry about that. So split two ways roughly $350 a month. Plus my bills brings total expenses up to $550 a month leaving me around $450. Now this has to go to gas, food, and other expenses.\n\nHow can I make the rest of my money go it's furthest? What initial expenses am I overlooking when moving into an apartment? Any advice on saving and making my money last would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Moving out, making ~$1000 a month, $200 in bills, ~$350 for rent and utilities. How can I make the rest last me for gas, food, etc. Any other advice is welcomed."}
{"id": "t3_ym4eg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So Reddit.. I just found out that this guy I really liked asked a girl out, what are some ways to cope? Any songs to cheer me up?", "post": "[I'm 17 so please bear with the teenage drama/immature hormone infused decisions]\n\nTo begin with, I liked 'James' ever since the beginning of my junior year, we have always been good friends but I just started to like him (because of hormones? I don't know? Seriously... he is like the sweetest guy ever). I thought everything was going fine and dandy since he asked me to prom. Keep in mind that my stupid introvert self refuses to tell him my true feelings, so I think he was confused on whether I had feelings for him or not. \nA few days after prom he texts my friend asking her if I would say yes if he asked me out; she then shows me the text, replies yes, and at this point I'm exuding happiness. Then..... a few days following the texts, at a typical underaged binge-drinking occasion he gets wasted and gets blowed by a whore; he is now incredibly ashamed and tries to keep this chapter of his life away from me, but of course I find out when my friend sends me pictures of it. By this point he texts my friends that he has no chance with me. I am, at this point confused too...\n\nFast forward a few months, we have just been hanging out as friends but I still have feelings for him, which I cannot subdue. \n\nI just got a call from a girl him and I just met at the fireworks that he has just asked her out. I don't know what to do/feel... I am completely confused... I am too new to this whole romance/love thing\nAny help Reddit from your experiences?", "summary": "Due to my introvert nature, I did not tell this guy I like that I like him, now he's asked another girl out... help a teen out?"}
{"id": "t3_4s8pg3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] boyfriend [19M] family is wealthy. His family is putting so much pressure on him to take over the company one day that I think he is broken. I found him crying in the bathroom last night going on about how he does not think he can do it.", "post": "So Hi Reddit, I have dated my boyfriend for 2 years now and I will be honest I don't like his parents. His mother has openly refereed to me as not good enough for her son because I want to be an elementary school teacher. His father only ever addresses him and it's always about how his studies are going. \n\nHe is an only child and his father puts alot of pressure on him. Everything is a competition, everything needs to taken so seriously all the time, his father demanded he study business at college to take over the business and when he graduates he will have an \" top position\" whatever that means. He puts up with this because he thinks he needs his dad and moms money. \n\nLast night I found him crying in the bathroom and he was acting so bizarre. He was hyperventilating and dry heaving, crying and kept telling me he has to man up, he has to take over the empire, he has to become the man his father is. He does not think he can do it \n\nI really don't know what to do in this situation", "summary": "Boyfriend had a breakdown last night, one of the worst I have ever seen and I don't know what to do about it"}
{"id": "t3_21pmsz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] and this girl [20 F] are into each other and about to date , but I suspect she's been lying to me about sex.", "post": "I've been talking with this girl for a few weeks now (I'll call her Sarah) at school and we've already established that we like each other, we've hung out a couple of times and we've kissed before, but something's been bothering me. She claims that she hasn't had sex since last year and she has told me that she doesn't talk to any of her exes, but two of my friends have told me on separate occasions that she talks about how she regularly has sex with her ex. I confronted her about this, and she adamantly denied, saying that she doesn't talk with her exes and that she definitely hasn't had sex with anyone in over a year. She went the whole nine yards with \"you should trust me over other people\" and all that. I chose to believe her and was happy for a week or two, until one of my friends told me that Sarah told her that she straight up lied to my face about the sex issue.\n\nI confronted her once again about it and she  again denied everything and said that I need to trust her over listening to other people and was pretty upset about it all. She is asking me how she can prove that she hasn't had sex.\n\nNow I know my two friends who told me she said these things have no reason to lie to me, but I also feel that she doesn't (or shouldn't at least) have a reason to lie to me. We've been pretty open about our sex life before.\n\n I'm torn between who I should listen to, because there's no way to actually prove if she's been having sex or not. Talking with any of her exes is out of the question.\n\nI desperately want to believe her but it seems fishy that two separate people would give me the same story on her. If she has been having sex with her exes while admitting her feelings for me, then that's obviously not someone I want to be involved in a relationship with. \nNow she is asking me how she can prove she is telling the truth, and I have no answer for her.", "summary": "Girl I like says she hasn't been sexing her exes, friends tell me otherwise. Who do I listen to/ how can I prove she is telling the truth?"}
{"id": "t3_e55s7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can anyone explain why I had SEVERE temporary schizophrenia?", "post": "Dear reddit,\nI once had severe temporary schizophrenia, and here's the shortest way to tell my story I can think of. I need to know how, or why this happened.\n\nI was starting to have problems with my neighbors when they called the cops on me for crying too loud and fighting (loooots of anxiety at that time of my life, over and done now). Afterwards I thought I heard him shoot off a silenced gun in my closet, and saw him stalking me, so for some reason I thought he was out to kill me. I flipped out, my husband brought me to the hospital (I thought I was shot) and they put me on haldol. During this sleepy period I thought I heard my husband saying mean horrible things about me and our relationship, which he later told me was false. I ended up at the mental hospital. While I was there I heard voices from the television telling me my husband was cheating on me and that him and my family were in trouble, and saw subtitles according to this theory that looked like they were manipulated by someone in the hospital. I yelled at a girl I thought cheated with him who didn't deny it, but she mightve been crazy. I thought this guy was the killer, and he said scary things to me. When I first got there, I couldve sworn I saw people getting hurt by him, and I thought the nurse who let me in had a gun and went after someone. I thought I saw my cats and chopped up bodies and people tied up at night.\n\nThe important things are, the whole time I was there I was on zyprexa, and still when I left, and that as soon as I left, outside of the expected paranoia that was temporary, I never again had any symptoms of schizophrenia.", "summary": "What happened to me reddit??? Why did I have schizophrenia for about a week, and then stop completely and utterly quickly? This haunts my life every day. Thanks for listening."}
{"id": "t3_3njb18", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27 F] miss my ex [33 M] of 7 years, it ended horribly and was maybe my fault", "post": "I left my ex of six years a year and a half ago. We were sort of a dead bedroom, but he's also the love of my life -- something I'm still sure of. To combat our dead bedroom, we had an open relationship, where I was allowed to date women (though I'm pretty straight, I was so starved for affection I went for it). I met a girl [28F] who changed things for me, and I left him for her. \n\nFast forward a year and a half. Things with her are okay, but I can't get him out of my head. During the first year after we broke up, he did nothing but try harder and harder to win me back. He did everything right, and I didn't even give him a solid no (because I really wasn't sure how I felt). But I feel terrible for making him feel so uncertain and cut off.\n\nI want to get back in touch. I have no idea what to say... I think he thinks I'm an awful person. I think I need to try or I'll regret it for years to come. I've peeked at his online dating accounts, enough to know he's not, like, married with kids now or anything. So I might be the crazy ex, but I'm not the crazy ex who disturbs a family that's moved on.", "summary": "I left my dead-bedroom ex for a woman after an open relationship, and I miss him and regret it. What should I do/say to him?"}
{"id": "t3_2wecnu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [33 M] with my GF [30F] 2 years, I just want to be single", "post": "Over the last couple weeks I have been thinking of ending things with my gf. Problem is that she lives with me also our relationship is somewhat good , we never fight and she is head over heels in love with me.  I want to break up because my reason is simple. I want to be single , but i dont feel that would be a good enough explanation for her and could leave her worse off because there is no closure. I want to know , is the reason of wanting to be single a good enough explanation?  I do not blame her or have any ill will toward her, and if we could somehow be friends in future I would welcome that because she is a great girl but I just want to be single. Easy as that\n\nAlso there is no warning signs at all so this would totaly blind side my gf if I told her I wanted to end things", "summary": "I want to be single , is that a good enough reason to break up or do i need to think of some deep meaningful bs excuse"}
{"id": "t3_dzd1r", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just bought some kids on the street candy for Halloween, why am I a sucker? (Read for context)", "post": "So we're going to this Halloween party downtown, and I see two little kids with no costume and nada. Mother was looking disinterested and the two boys were looking around at everyone's costumes like it was a museum. I felt sorry for 'em, being 10PM and they had no candy in their hands. Mom had some groceries.\n\nSo while everyone was waiting for the streetcar at the bus depot I walked over to the convenience stand and bought a fuck-handfuls of candies and chocolates, I was right beside them anyway and was gonna speak to 'em in Spanish and just hand that shit out to make it inconspicuous.\n\nAs a child I've lived through many misfortunes and a victim of circumstance. I hated missing Halloween as a kid, so I thought I'd make a few kids happy at least with some candies right? So as the street car was running I decided to stop being a pussy and start handing out candies, as I got up I noticed it...\n\nTurns out, those weren't groceries, the two boys' bags were filled with fucking candies and shit. They went trick or treatin' somewhere I guess. I had a kangaroo pouch full of overpriced candies and such. I felt like crap. So I just started giving them to random people.\n\nHow do I stop caring so much? Especially about kids. I can't stand seeing sad kids. I've been through some shit, and it sucks.", "summary": "bought some candies to give to some kids I thought didn't go trick or treating, turns out they had tons of candy."}
{"id": "t3_18yyep", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you help someone after being held at gun point?", "post": "Yesterday I received the phone call from my boy friend, while walking the a local park no more then four blocks from our home just trying to get some fresh air and some energy out because he hasn't been sleeping well a man had walked up behind him pointed a gun into his back and said \"give me everything you've got.\" Scared he turns out his pockets and with luck on his side had left his wallet at home along with all of his other personal belongings. After being patted down and asked to get to his knees then man turns around and runs away. \n\nThis experience has left him with nightmares and insecurities (which have always been there just more of an issue after this experience). I want to be supportive and help him become more confident in himself but unsure of psychological exercises we could try and suggestions/stories to help him get through this traumatizing experience. \n\nI know he is not alone.", "summary": "Boy friend was been robbed at gun point less then 4 blocks away from our home, what did you or someone you know do to get back on your feet?"}
{"id": "t3_2txw8b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F23] am infuriated by the fact that I fall victim to my bf's[M23] constant manipulation.", "post": "Recently, I walked out on my bf of almost 4 yrs due to the fact that when I asked him to check his newly locked piece of shit Note 4 for his FB relationship status in front of me, he disappeared to the bathroom for 10 minutes only to come back upstairs and answer \"idk\" to every question I asked.\n\nAnd it wasn't just FB reddit, it was the fact that I found fucking texts between him and a chick regarding having sex when they met, even after she asked about me twice...and he dismissed me, TWICE. This was after a year of being together,  and if he hadn't broken down in tears and begged me to forgive him, I would've easily walked away.\n\nAnd it wasn't just THAT reddit, it was the fact that I randomly got a message from some guy telling me to tell my bf to stop talking to his girlfriend. \nOr the constant late night buzzing of his phone.\nOr whenever I asked to look through his phone with him, he'd dissappear to the bathroom, then come back and hand it to me.\nOr when my younger cousin asked to play with his phone and she found naked pictures of a random chick off of what looked like, snapchat.\nOr when a long time friend of mine came to me with news that he was flirting with someone we both attended high school with.\n\nAnd yet, EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME, he had an excuse. Something to make perfect sense in the dumbest way that at the same time would make me sound like a bitchy, jealous, asshat. And for some fucking reason, I played along. Slowly getting more and more miserable that he could just sit there and still be affectionate, still tell me he loved me, and still convince me that I was the only one he wanted. I never knew I would become one of those girls I always wanted to shake sense into but here I am, the same as them.  \nAnd still, I can never convince myself to be 100% sure if he's fucking me over.", "summary": "Bf of 4 years manipulates me into thinking I'm wrong about him being sketchy and I'm sick of losing my common sense to him."}
{"id": "t3_3lnquw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my [19 M] childhood friends, don't have anything in common anymore.", "post": "I have two friends who I've known for over 10 years, but recently I haven't been enjoying the time I've been spending with them.\n\nFor a few months when I've gone over to hang out with them, they have been doing the same thing every time; they are playing video games and vaping.  I have nothing against what they do, but it isn't interesting to me.  I just end up sitting on a couch watching them play games for 2-3 hours before I make up some excuse to go home.  We also talk and joke around while they play which I enjoy.  I've tried suggesting alternate things to do, however they usually turn them down.\n\nWhat makes this such a dilemma is the history we have together.  They were friends who helped me through depression.  There was a time when I wasn't going to school and started being homeschooled because I was too anxious and depressed, but they visited me at least once a week.  I feel indebted to what they did for me.  We've gone on trips together and have a ton of memories that are priceless to me.  I feel obligated to remain their friend.\n\nI also feel like our relationship between the three of us is askew.  They both live together and this has changed how we interact together.  Both of them consider each other brothers, and I am just their friend.  They have so much more in common that I feel isolated.  One of the friends has also been a bit hostile towards me lately.  I used to tease him more than my other friends, but have stopped and made it clear that I am trying to be kinder.  It seems like he is trying to assert dominance or something...I don't know.  I'm leaning more towards not hanging out with them.  What do you think?", "summary": "I don't like spending time with my best friends, but we have so much history that it makes it hard to end our friendship."}
{"id": "t3_1gtm8z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Will making myself (24m) scarce make my girlfriend (24f) of 3 years & on/off LDR, who I think is about to leave me, decide she wants me after all?", "post": "Both Canadians here, we're both in Canada for summer but were planning to move to Europe together this fall. 2 years dating in same city & now our 1 year LDR is so close to ending, but all of a sudden, she seems to be losing interest (way less texts/calls, emotion). \n\nThe question is simple: If I stop texting/calling her, will my scarcity make her realize she doesn't want to leave me? Someone said this would increase her attraction to me on another post & it got me thinking that maybe being the same old me & letting her walk all over me won't increase my chances of keeping her.", "summary": "what kind of reaction will I get if I stop talking to her? Or, say, greatly decrease the amount we talk"}
{"id": "t3_30zeic", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] asked to prom by my friend [17 F] because she needed a date, don't want it to be just as friends", "post": "Hello, so I am thoroughly confused as to how to act here. I was considering asking her myself, but was a bit taken aback when she did it herself, but I think it was just because she needed a date. That's what I have heard at least, but it isn't exactly what I had hoped. We dated for a few weeks in Middle School, but nothing serious of course, but now I am starting to have feelings for her again. In a way it seems a bit weird that she asked me in the first place as we haven't talked too much recently. I am currently debating between making a big deal of actually asking as a date or just getting her flowers and telling her how excited I am.\n\nThe main problem I have boils down to a few simple questions: Is there a way I can find out whether she meant it as a date or just friends? Is there a way for me to get that idea in her head? Is it a good idea to try and take her out on an individual date before-hand, and should I make a big deal of asking her?", "summary": "Crazy nerdy clueless high schooler is way out of his league. Is there anything I can do to make this more than just two friends?"}
{"id": "t3_21o3qo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] interested in her [17F] duration, personal issue", "post": "Hello /r/relationships,\nI'm kind of in the same situation I was in a year ago. I was seeing that girl from the US more frequently from week to week and started to get more interested in her. As time passed by, I lost 28 pounds in almost 4 months (mid march to end june) just because of her. I was weighing 117 pounds in march last year and got my weight down to 89 pounds which felt very good and I didn't even have any issues with my health and even now I don't.\n\nThe thing is that I didn't really have to lose so much weight in such a short time but I still did it because I just wanted to talk to her which -in the end- I couldn't do because she had moved from Germany over to England. I gained like 15 pounds back in the time from july to february this year. I then started to do sports again and lost 5 pounds already which is good but now the problem is that -like last time- I feel very empty inside because of all the hope I had back then and I also have now.\n\nWhy now? Because I'm chatting with a girl for a few days now and she seems to be very interested in me I guess. I have to mention that I felt quiete normal until yesterday. At the beginning, when I asked her for a picture of her face, she did not want to send me one because I was just an usual stranger to her. We were chatting for quiete some time and then, yesterday, she sent me a picture of her face and I was just stunned of how beautiful she is. Now that I know I really want to meet her, I have that big problem of losing weight again. My body doesn't force me to do it but my mind does. Normally, I'd be hungry, especially after eating one slice of bread but like last year, I can't help it and only drink water.\n\nI really hope I can get a little help from you guys and I'm sorry if some things don't sound well expressed but thank you.", "summary": "Met a girl over the internet, she sent me a picture of her and I just felt like I was in love and now I have my personal issue of not eating much again."}
{"id": "t3_2sokic", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is my (23F) coworker (40M) flirting with me? We've worked together for 8 months.", "post": "One of my coworkers is so handsome. We chat and banter a fair bit but there are some things he does which make it seem like he's flirting with me (which I would be totally ok with), but Im not sure. Just to be clear, in no way am I looking to 'get with' this guy because of the obvious age difference. I'm just curious whether he's flirting with me or if I'm reading too much into it. \n\nFirst off, half the time he calls me by name, the other half he calls me things like 'love', 'sweetie', 'babe' etc. On a few occasions, there has been a group of people talking, and he'll look at me with a smile and wink at me. Also, he throws in statements every now and then about my appearance - for example, once I asked him for help with something and he said \"I've got it, all you have to do is sit there and look beautiful\" (aw!) \n\nThere are only 2 other girls at my work (both very close to me in age) but I've never really seen him interact with them, so I don't know if he's just like that with everyone.", "summary": "Coworker does some things that come off to me as flirting, but I'm not sure if that's the case or if I'm just reading too much into it because I find him attractive."}
{"id": "t3_1qrz1c", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[M23] seeking opinions on my relationship status.", "post": "I'm currently in a open relationship with a good [F20] that I met like 1 month ago. We have been seeing eachother quite frequently and I've started to grow more and more interested in her.\n\nThe problem still is that she is satisfied with the current situation with us hanging out and that we occasionally end up having sex. Mostly because she doesn't want to (in her words) end up being very annoying and controling, which she has stated that she gets in relationships. Mostly since she had this experience with a previous boyfriend of hers. This ended up with them drifting apart i think (haven't really researched those events due to it not being my business)\n\nMy problem with the current situation is that the relationship is open and that both of us can see other people if we end up partying etc. I myself isn't much for going out and doing this though since I dislike the clubs for several reasons. She has been with other dudes twice during parties though, which makes me kinda sad since I haven't really got anything to say due to the relationship status. Well I have told her that I don't like it but I can't really say anything else because: we had previously discussed the actual relationship terms when we started seeing eachother. \n\nNow Im not sure if I want to go on with it. She is a good friend and all and I would like to be with her. But not on these terms, since it just ends up being weird.", "summary": "[M23] and [F20] having problems in an open relationship, wants to make it work, not sure if should try to make it work or just end it."}
{"id": "t3_elgds", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My roommate is whiney, clingy, messy, annoying, and clueless that she drives me insane. Advice?", "post": "I know this is mostly for romantic relationships, but I am hoping to get some help.\n\nI have been living with \"Jen\" all semester. At first things were great, but then she got messy and clingy and whiney. She leaves half eaten pudding cups around and her dirty clothes are everywhere. She's single and bitter about it while I'm in a happy LTR (We never hang out in our room while she's there and she has never seen us do more than a quick kiss.). When I try to leave to get alone time or to see my boyfriend she complains and practically begs me to take her along, even if I have tried to make it clear that it's a date. She cannot stand to be alone--ever. She's only taking 7 units and just got a job last week, so basically she just sits in our room playing iPod games always.\n\nI NEED alone time, I love my boyfriend and like to spend time with him alone sometimes, and I'm really struggling to feel compassion for her. I know she's under a lot of financial stress, so I don't want to dump on her by giving her a list of everything I hate about her. But she's the kind of person that if I told her I need to be just roommates--not best friends--she'd fly off the handle. And our friends are the same people, so she's not just a random person. She thinks everything is peachy and we're living together for the rest of college (I have made NO promises to that affect, she assumes.). \n\nJen is a difficult person that holds grudges. I am happy to be her friend, but as long as she is my roommate I need my alone time and guilt-free boyfriend time without feeling like I am personally causing her loneliness. She's taken to bashing me to our friends about how, as her roommate, I ought not leave her alone this much. How can I talk to her without causing her to freak out, stress even more, and hate me?", "summary": "Once happy roommate is messy even when I ask her to clean, guilt trips me for spending time with my boyfriend, and whines when I leave her alone. She's also a grudge-holder. Advice on how to deal?"}
{"id": "t3_3i9riq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "3 UPDATE: I (18M) don't feel comfortable with my girlfriend's bestfriend (20M) being presistant with my girlfriend. (18F)", "post": "Last post: \n\nSo I heard what you guys said... Again. I talked to her about it but she was pretty set about doing it over 1-2 months. I argued with her a bit saying that it will create drama since she'd be replying to him less and less over a course of time. This did happen before as she ignored him because she wanted to indirectly say that she didn't like him. Anyways, I told her I could tolerate her doing it over a course of time but just last night, she told me that she cut him off. \n\nNow, she's pretty sad. Her main reason for being sad is because she had lots of memories with him and now, she doesn't have anyone other than me to talk to everyday. She says she feels lonely and I don't know what to do. (Her dad is very controlling and rarely lets her go out to see her friends) \n\nI feel extremely bad about telling her to cut him off. For me, I was in a band in my senior year and we have an active Facebook group chat and when I was showing her some funny messages today to try and cheer her up, she got all quiet and got sad. She no longer has her best friend to talk to her everyday about nothing and I feel like I can't fill the void for some reason...\n\nDo you guys have any suggestions on what I can do to cheer her up?", "summary": "Girlfriend cut off best friend and is now lonely since she doesn't have anyone else to talk to everyday other than me. I don't know what to do to make her feel better."}
{"id": "t3_3d584j", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by taking 10x the amount of morphine I thought I was", "post": "I deal with a lot of chronic pain issues and for many many years I took 10mg morphine sulfate as needed. As we found other ways to manage the pain, I ended up moving and didn't form a new relationship with a pain clinic, so when my morphine ran out, I just let it go. \n\nHowever, from time to time, I have a flair up that is particularly bad. A friend of mine who is extremely ill had a bottle of morphine from when his docs tried him on it, but it hadn't worked well and they switched him back to dilauded, so he gave it to me. \n\nLast night was pretty damn bad, so after almost a year of having it sit on my shelf, I decided to take one. \n\nLast night was... odd, and I woke up this morning dizzy and miserable. I was supposed to drive to a doctor's appointment, but realized that was a bad plan. Eventually it occurred to me that my friend is *very* sick and maybe they wouldn't have him on 10mg morphine. Which is when I realized that it was **100mg** not 10. \n\nSo I'm just going to lie here for the day I think.", "summary": "this is why you don't take other people's meds kids. I took a 100mg morphine when I thought I was taking a 10"}
{"id": "t3_1zcu45", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19 M] girlfriend [19 F] doesn't want to be with me because of her career and I think she's being ridiculous.", "post": "I'm a student in college, and I have my future planned out and contracted out for the next ~10 years of my life. My girlfriend of 1 year doesn't know exactly what she wants after college. She has a couple ideas of going to grad school, being a teacher, or going straight into her field, geology. In about a year, I will be told where to live and work after my graduation by my employer, but for now I don't know. \n\nShe says if she moves with me after college, that she will be sacrificing her career and will not ever get to be an independent person. It really has been bothering her and depressing her because she recently realised she doesn't know what to do after college. It seems like this idea just popped up out of nowhere, we have been happy together. So she says we shouldn't be together anymore. I don't think her logic makes sense. If she doesn't know what she wants, and she still claims to love me, then why is she so concerned about her independence? Am I somehow preventing her from being independent? Is it an excuse to breakup with me? Is there something I don't understand?", "summary": "My girlfriend wants to break up because she thinks living with me after college will mean she is not independent and will limit her career options and I think she is wrong."}
{"id": "t3_dsbbb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Please Help Reddit question for medical/doctor people", "post": "Hey reddit about a 2 weeks ago my doctor hsd some sort of complaint file against him and until it gets taken care of he cant write any rxs. long store short if been out of meds that without i can work or really function a normal person. every office ive called has just given me  run around and told e if i get bad i cloud go to th ER witch i dont want to i want to me i want to work but with out my meds i cant is there any one out there that can please give me some advice on what i can do to get my meds asap and help would be greatly appreciated", "summary": "cant get my meds everyone i call basically tells my piss off and good luck. meanwhile im slowing loosing the person ive worked so hard to be come."}
{"id": "t3_yth1t", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Relationships based on chemical attractions or is this more?", "post": "So I fell in love with my bestfriend on accident a few years ago. Sometimes I honestly believe we are soulmates as cheesy as that sounds. We finish each other sentences and I still feel my heart skip a beat whenever I think about him. Even just holding him sends electricity through my body. I just don't know if this is residual sexual attraction based on the chemical component or if its more. The only problem though is that in terms of a relationship we both wanted completely different things and were not on the same continuum. I got frustrated and begin almost hating him and pushed him away and actually ended up marrying someone else without him ever knowing. [I got married because that's what you do at my age. I wanted something solid] At this point I am overcome with guilt as neither my husband nor this man know the extent to my relationship with each of them.[My husband and I have a great relationship and all my needs are being met] however, I cannot stop seeing, thinking, or lying to my bestfriend. I imagine having a full fledged affair with him if you can even call it that as he has no idea that it'd be an affair. So reddit, what do I do? My heart, soul, and body want one guy and my head says youre a moron for even thinking about divorce as my bestfriend is not ready for that sort of commitment either way and my husband is a wonderful guy. Do i just lose both of them and blame myself for being selfish bitch and come clean? Do I have the affair and hope that my feelings are just pent up sexual tension? Or do I just cut all ties and go on with my marriage?", "summary": "Do you believe love is just a bunch of chemicals? How can I stop being a stupid whore who's the cause of two amazing men suffering?"}
{"id": "t3_3dh85c", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "My fianc\u00e9 is in the U.S. illegally, and I've pressed domestic violence assault with child abuse charges (case pending). Will he get deported?", "post": "[CO] Finally left my increasingly abusive fianc\u00e9 of 2 1/2 years (by getting him arrested on 3rd degree domestic violence assault and child abuse charges, along with getting him served a permanent protection order, which is now pending the domestic violence case's resolution). Fianc\u00e9 and I have a child, and after he's convicted and serves his sentence, I fear he will try to file to see her. He has out of control anger issues (destroyed a bunch of stuff and bruised me up on several occasions) and has control issues (isolated me from friends and family stopped me from going to a self help group because he said I was turning into a bitch). This is his second domestic violence offense (the former was 9-10 years ago with a previous significant other).\n\nI thought ICE would put a hold on him when he was initially in custody, but he has bailed out and is out working. I've heard every answer possible from victim advocates, DA, Guardian ad litem. No one has any idea. I called the local immigration detention office more than once, no one ever returned my call. He tells friends that we'll get back together when this is all said and done, I never want to hear from him again, nor do I want him to have any contact with our daughter. Does anyone know (at least) the chances of him getting deported, or even to help him get deported?", "summary": "I have a pending domestic violence case and a pending permanent protection order against my fianc\u00e9 (who's in the U.S. illegally). What are the chances of him getting deported?"}
{"id": "t3_11ahhl", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(15/m) I'm young, but I'm having a terrible problem, and would like Reddit's assistance. Any advice is helpful. Please. (warning, long)", "post": "Reddit, I'm having a terrible problem. Right now, I'm seeing (not dating) this girl, we'll call Amanda (15/f). There's this other girl, who we'll call... Libby (15/f). \n\nBackground information: I met Amanda in a class, and we liked each other. I asked her to a school formal, and she agreed. We've been going to group things like BBQ's and bowling for about a year. We're not *dating*, but I planned on it once we get older (my personal opinion is that most dating relationships started young end badly). Anyways, about halfway through my seeing Amanda, Libby came into my life. We started out as friends, nothing more, but gradually grew into best friends. Like, super close friends. Anyways, we've talked and just grown closer. Now, back to the present. I'm still seeing Amanda, but I really like Libby, and she really likes me. Now, don't get me wrong, Amanda's a great girl, and I would love to keep our relationship going, but Libby.... I just really like Libby, and I think we would just be better in the long run. But I don't want to hurt Amanda by breaking up with her! Sometimes, I wish something happened in me and Amanda's relationship where she just didn't like me anymore, or something, just so I can be with Libby. But... I just don't know what to do, at all. I'm so confused. I need help. Please help! \n\nNote, we are in a small, private school. If anything happened, everyone would know about it.", "summary": "In a \"relationship\" with Amanda, really like Libby, but don't want to hurt Amanda by breaking up with her. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3i7ti5", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Notice of tax deficiency, post divorce", "post": "Hello fellow PF redditors, I received a notice of tax deficiency from 2012 in the amount of $2,074.  That year my ex-wife and I each had one 1099 to our names that were not properly filed.  The notice includes the 1099 amounts and corresponding social security #s.  \n\nWe divorced in 2014 and our divorce decree states \"each party shall be solely and separately responsible for paying any and all debts heretofore contracted or incurred by either in their own name.\"  So, it appears that we are each individually responsible for these debts, and now I need to get the IRS to break this down and pursue her separately from me.  I will appreciate any advice on how to get a hold of the IRS so this can be broken down and they can pursue each of us individually.  I always feared that an issue like this would arise and force my ex and I to reconnect, and I do not want that.  Thank you!", "summary": "IRS says my ex wife and I owe back taxes, I want to know how I can get the IRS to break this down and treat us as separate individuals. "}
{"id": "t3_2jjxj6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 21M confused about my friends (20F) actions last night and whether they meant more than I initially thought?", "post": "I live in a shared house with 4 other friends. I got a call last night while playing Xbox with one of my buddies at around 3am from a (20F) friend asking to come round. She had been drinking but headed back early and said she was lonely (her exact words). She asked to come round and i said she could. I've known this girl a couple of years and she used to be FWB with one of the guys I live with. \n\nTurns out she was only walking from her house which is pretty close by and got to mine like 5 minutes after the phone call. I was downstairs with the buddy I was up with and we let her in. I don' think she was expecting me to be up with anyone else (can't be 100% sure on that though). One of the first things she commented on was about my new haircut and appearance (both positive) which she has never done in the past.\n\nI made her tea and soon after another housemate came down to see what was happening (her previous FWB). A lot of the conversation was directly between me and her and we really did have a laugh the whole time she was there. \n\nAfter about an hour she decided to head back and me and my buddies went back to my room. They immediately suggested she was hitting on me and that I should have walked her back but up to that point I'd assumed she genuinely was bored/lonely as I know that she lives with people that she doesn't know/like very well. Thing is they never allowed to both to be alone in the room so I wasn't sure if they were just joking around.\n\nJust to clarify she's never done anything like this before and is only a friend i see perhaps a couple of times a month. I messaged her soon after she left asking if she got back ok and she said she did.\n\nDo you guys think she was being flirty? I certainly didn't feel at the time she was giving enough signals that she was interested and even now looking back I think its unlikely.", "summary": "A friend (21F) asked to come over to my house last night and possibly wanted more than tea and giggles."}
{"id": "t3_253ru0", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Help Wanted: Working Out and Sex Drive", "post": "On Sunday, I ran my first 10-mile race. While this is a great accomplishment I have noticed a significant spike in my sex drive during the week leading up to the race and in the days since I ran; about 10 days in total.\nI workout 2-3 times per week for about 45 minutes each time and have average eating habits. During the week leading up to the race, I ate mostly a plant-based diet - salad for lunch and dinner, fish for protein, etc. - and worked out 3 times and ran only twice (Not great prep, I know.) This helped me lose about 2 or 3 pounds.\nNow, I cannot stop thinking about sex! This morning (Thursday) I spent about 3 hours watching porn and \"distracted\" myself by going to a midday fitness class. Now I want to jerk off again or have find someone to sex.\nI don't know what to do. This is both embarrassing and confusing. I want to continue working out but am honestly afraid being fit will turn me into a sex addict.\nBackground: I played soccer in college and recall a similar correlation during my off season workouts. I am now in my late 20s and no longer train 5-6 days a week as was the norm in college. This is the most physically active I have been since my early 20s.\nQuestion: Is there research that has connected a higher sex drive (thinking more about sex) with a increased physical activity (working out)? Also, share your experiences because I feel like an outlier here.", "summary": "I ran my first long race and have not been able to stop thinking about sex over the last 10 days. Does working out more turn you into a horn dog?"}
{"id": "t3_qyppd", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Is it creepy if...?", "post": "19F nerdy as half hell interested in this nerdy as all hell 22M\n\nIs it creepy if I message him on facebook to hang out?\n\nWe know each other so it's not like getting a message from a random anon or something. We are in a club together at school and almost always talk about our nerdy interests...D&D, favorite video games, pokemon...and things of that nature. He's socially awesome penguin, and I'm totally socially awkward penguin. I suspect that he may be a bit awkward in the way of girls though...\n\nI don't have his phone number, so it's not like I could text him or something. Every time we've been about to exchange numbers something totally interrupts the exchange, and ultimately, it doesn't happen.\n\nSo reddit...help me out here. Please.", "summary": "Nerdy girl interested in this nerdy guy. We know each other and such, but don't have phone numbers. Creepy if I facebook message him to hang out?"}
{"id": "t3_1l2ts3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [18f] caught my [18m] boyfriend posting naked selfies on a gay male subreddit!", "post": "I'm not really sure where to begin, I found the picture earlier today and confronted him about it. He said it was only a one time thing and that he was 'curious' to see what men thought of him but for me this is a huge red flag. \n\nWe've been together on-off for under a year now, don't get me wrong I have absolutely nothing wrong with LGBT individuals, I've got quite a number of gay friends, my best friend is gay... it's just, it's really weird that he was actively seeking approval from gay men. It's not the first time he's done this apparently, there was an incident a year and a half ago (before we met) that he traded pictures with a guy not too far away and it made me feel uncomfortable. \n\nHe posted the picture during one of our 'off' periods, about two weeks before we got back together. He said he never wanted to hide it from me which is why he didn't use a throwaway account but he also expected me to not react well to it. His personality as well is rather 'camp' (sorry if I offend anybody) and girls thinking he's gay has been an issue in the past, but he assures me he's straight, I don't think I believe him anymore. I'm a mixture of confused, angry and somewhat disgusted right now and I really need advice. I've proposed we take a short 'break' so I can get my thoughts around it so we're not really talking atm.", "summary": "Caught boyfriend uploading a naked picture on a gay subreddit, found it (he didn't use a throwaway) and am not sure how to feel/react."}
{"id": "t3_3968oy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going on a bro date.", "post": "This actually happened about a week and a half ago. So, I recently moved to NYC from Miami to go to school. I decided to come up here a few months early to get acclimated, and I got a job at a Verizon retail store pretty quickly (had some experience).\n\nWe were kind of slow one day at work a couple weeks ago, and I don't know that many people yet because I just arrived a few months ago. This guy comes in for a phone charger, and I'm showing him options while making small talk. I asked him where he works, if he's from NY originally, etc. He gives me a business card and tells me to feel free to text him on his personal cell.\n\nI shoot him a text a few days later, and we agree to meet up for drinks at this bar he knows. I show up, we go inside, it's kind of a dive bar, which I'm cool with. We grab some bar food and a couple beers, and we're chatting away.\n\nBased on some comments, I start to get this vibe that he doesn't like women, which is fine, but then I start to get this vibe that he likes ME. We're a few drinks in, and he starts giving me the stare. I made this excuse to get out, and I agree to walk him to the subway before calling a cab. We get to the station, and he admits that he likes me a lot and wants to meet up again. I mustered something like \"Thanks, let's hang out again sometime,\" and then texted him later that I'm only interested in women but had a good time.\n\nEver since, I've been questioning the vibe that I'm putting out for him to have thought that I liked him romantically...", "summary": "Grabbing drinks with a bro, turns out I was actually on a date, now questioning if I'm putting out the right vibe."}
{"id": "t3_2geohz", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "[Story] I got motivated today.", "post": "So basically, I've had a rough few months. I finished university and got a good degree. \n\nIt's been like 3 months now, I've been applying for jobs and I recently got a good job. But now it's a struggle to get into work cos I'm trying to move to a new city.\n\nMy normally very positive mindset has taken a real kick in. I feel like I'm never gonna be able to move into my own place which is my current goal. I've been broke for so long that it feels permanent. but tonight I've had a breakthrough.\n\nI'm broke, and basically have no home. But tonight I realised that I have a degree, I have a smashing girlfriend, I have a supportive (albeit poor) family. But more than any of that, I've got a mentality to not give up. \n\nThis whole sub has the common theme of 'the only real loser is the one who gives up' going through it and that really resonates with me now. \n\nThe job I got is good money so I've got three weeks of struggle then I'm golden. But my mindset has been so bad lately that I've only been seeing negatives. That's not me at all, I've always been positive and hate how I've been thinking lately.\n\nBut anyway, the point, done with being negative. I've done so much and come so far, only a short distance to go now. Let's do it.\n\nSorry for the rant, I just needed to get this stuff out.\n\nAnd I have a quick request, any pictures that quote about \"how far you've come\" or stuff like that. Preferably ones that would make a good iPhone 5s wallpaper.", "summary": "I've done so much and come so far, I'm not giving up yet, now that I'm so close. Also, picture request."}
{"id": "t3_1t7rn7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend said something that makes me think we're not going to last much longer now.", "post": "My boyfriend (19) and I (19) have been together for a year. We've had major fights a couple of times but we've resolved them. We both love each other a lot. He constantly keeps telling me how I'm the love of his life and how I'm better than the girl in his dreams. \n\nYesterday, we were just talking and he said that he can't imagine being with anyone else and as much as he like that he found the love of his life, he is kind of sad because then he can't get to experience other shitty girlfriends before appreciating and deserving a good one. When he said that, I was taken aback. I freaked out and it hurt me a lot. He apologized for saying that and said he's sorry and he loves me a lot but after he said that, I don't know how to feel about him anymore. I try my best to be whatever he wants me to be. I'm nice, caring, loving, serious about school, my future, and about us. I thought he was too until he dropped that on me. What should I feel about that? Should I keep holding on to him or let him have his \"shitty girlfriend\" experience (this means letting him go forever)?", "summary": "Boyfriend said I'm the love of his life but is sad that he found me so early since he can't experience shitty slutty girlfriends first."}
{"id": "t3_u5a2x", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey reddit, I need some advice.", "post": "My grandma passed away on monday and I want to make people aware without straight up telling them. I originally wasn't supposed to tell anyone because my brother is on a trip to Germany for college and we didn't want him to find out. After some long thought and some advice from a priest who had been a good friend of my dad for a long time we decided to call my brother yesterday and tell him what happened. The only reason I wasn't supposed to tell anyone was because if possibly someone were to write something on facebook about it, it would have been really bad for him to find out that way. Now that he already knows, I want people to be aware because I have already had a few jack-asses from school say stuff to me about not being at practice or missing a sport banquet and I am really upset because my grandma was EXTREMELY close with me and my brother. Personally I find it annoying when people post things on facebook like \"RIP grandma you will be missed\" because I feel like if someone really wants to say something to a late family member then they should pray (or because I know how you  guys get pissed about religion) just talk to them. I am not the kind of person who likes to draw attention to myself and i know none of you on here know me so I felt like this would be a better option. But I want to let people know about my grandma without making myself seem like an attention whore. Just something subtle because i really don't feel like making someone feel like shit after they have said something bad about me then I tell them I just lost my 88 year old grandmother from a failed kidney who i didn't even get to say goodbye to. \n\n**bold", "summary": "My grandma passed away and I want a way to make people aware of it without drawing a lot of attention to myself. Thanks Reddit"}
{"id": "t3_watme", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think we need to break up, but she believes in the relationship too much to see it.", "post": "I'm a 26 yo male, she's 28. We've been dating for nearly a year. Our relationship's had its ups and downs, and I've been feeling more downs as of late. I feel like two out of three times we are together, there's a conflict or emotional escalation.\n\nMost recently, she came home from a day of running errands with my car, frustrated and tense. I'd made dinner for her, and we'd planned on going to the movies together. She was really short with me and impatient as I tried to get her to come unwind over the meal. As we were eating, I said it appeared we wouldn't have time to get to the movie. It'd been my idea to go, but she suddenly got super invested in going, and started trying to get me to rush, and got upset when she felt I wasn't moving fast enough. This escalated, and I ended up detaching from the situation and trying to just be there for her.\n\nI'm feeling like more of these situations happen, and the one I explain above, though minor, struck me as particularly chaotic. It felt like the situation escalated when there was no need for it. It's chaos that I can't use in my life. Other times, she's judgy of others, quick to find fault in her and my friends, will openly alienate people if she deems them unethical, and is often frustratingly needy/demanding of my time (I often feel like I can't say no to hanging out unless I have something specific and important scheduled).\n\nTalking to her today, I realize she doesn't see how these things stress me out. I try to express my misgivings, but she chalks them up to being due to us being very close, sensitive people who are attuned to one another's moods, that I'm focusing on the bad moments over the good ones. Trouble is, I can't think of a good moment in the last month or so, but I can name a dozen bad ones. \n\nI've never dumped someone, so I don't know when you know you should, and I don't know what to do when your s.o. will be fighting to keep you.", "summary": "I find myself stressed, sad, and worn thin in this relationship, but she loves me and refuses to believe I might be unhappy. Am I focusing on the bad, or should I break up with her?"}
{"id": "t3_272pex", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [00 M/F] with my ___ [00 M/F] duration, short-description", "post": "My girlfriend caught me with porn on my computer. She was understandably pissed. Not so much that I was looking at it but that I was keeping it from her. We talk work things out. She says it's fine if I look as long as I don't hide it. Great we make up and continue on with our lives.\n\nLater she's on my computer helping me with my resume and finds the file with screenshots of pics I'd taken. I had (wrongly) assumed she'd seen those. She gets pissed all over again. I feel like an asshole again. She is on there looking for something else and finds the download file piled high with stuff I didn't even know was on there including videos. I don't download videos because I don't really find them terribly sexy at all. I don't even know how they got there (I'm not very computer savvy to these things). Some of the sites I was on maybe a bit sketchy?\n\nI feel like a total jerk now and she is understandably upset. I want the relationship to continue and she still tells me she wants me to feel comfortable looking at that stuff if I want. I don't know if I can do that anymore. All that will happen now is that I'll end up feeling guilty about hurting her if I look at it and I won't enjoy it.\n\nI would appreciate your thoughts on the matter.", "summary": "I hid porn on my computer. Partner is upset that I hid it rather than looked at it.  I'm sorry that I hurt her.  What do I do now?"}
{"id": "t3_4i5a6j", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "[27/m] Bare with me, but last night at the movies...", "post": "I found myself kind of making small talk with the manager. Normally when I try to do that, it's met with \"ha yeah\" or some short equivalent but she asked me questions in return before I made a foolish joke(ie enjoy your show, you too...) but she retorted. Then she wandered over the concession stand after ringing me out, whether she was bored or for me, I dunno. But, as I was just chatting about whatever, she asked another question. Kind of smiley. The questions are irrelevant but I honestly, can not stop thinking about her-- and I tried to spot her again before the movie ended and after but she wasn't around.\n\nI could hardly sleep last night due for the thought of her. But, I don't know how I am going to have another interaction with her. Part of me wants to just walk in, ask for her, and tell her the truth, asking her out from there. But, I don't know if that would be weird...then I'm considering just buying a gift card but I don't know if she'll be there. I understand it wasn't much to go off of but after the insufferable amount of rejection from online dating, it was a rare treat to have someone I found attractive seem semi-interested. Any suggestions on what I could do? Or if I'm even barking up the right tree?", "summary": "Made small talk with a cute girl, she asked questions back, might be something there, wondering how I might find a chance to approach her again"}
{"id": "t3_1ntpjr", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Lost my job and relationship on the same day. Ready for a new start. What would you do if you were me?", "post": "I graduated college last August and got a job working in Charlotte. I moved up there with my girlfriend of 2 years, who had also recently graduated and gotten a job there. Fast forward to a month ago. The COO of my company calls me in on a Friday and tells me that they were going to move me to a different department. I didnt really want to leave my current position, so I told him I would take the weekend to think it over.\n\nLater that night, i was exhausted and fell asleep early. I woke up to loud noises in the kitchen. So i walked in there and found my gf packing her shit up in a bag. She had gone through my phone and saw a text convo to a friend of mine about how I had been having doubts as we moved toward marriage (due to religious differences). Blah blah blah...we broke up. 100% over.\n\nWith me and her being over and me \"losing\" my job, there was nothing for me in Charlotte. So i went in on Monday and put in my two weeks at my job. I got out of my apartment in Charlotte and moved back to my mom's house. \n\nI have $7,000 in savings. 2 credit cards with no balances. ~$11500 in student loans (payments currently deferred). I dont really have any expenses besides gas right now. \n\n**I want to start a new life.**\n\nI have considered getting certified to teach english abroad for a year or two (i would probably wind up in asia). After that, I would apply to the peace corps. This has always been a dream of mine. But i dont know if its realistic.\n\nIf not that, I would like to at least move to a new city and find a new line of work. Preferably somewhere out west or in colorado. Im tired of the south.\n\nIf you were me, what would you do?", "summary": "In one day I went from comfortably employed and in a healthy relationship, to single and unemployed. What the **FUCK** should I do with my life now?"}
{"id": "t3_4ua561", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "$15k Home equity loan: Ballpark increase in mortgage?", "post": "We're interested in a relatively small remodel that we've been told would cost us about $15k. I'm wondering if someone could give a ballpark on what a HELOC of that size would add back to our monthly loan payment. I can wait until Monday to ask our credit union, but I figured some of you folks might be able to hazard a guess. \n\nBackground: We're in the process of refinancing (no-cost) our home of three years in Los Angeles. We paid about $550k for it and it looks like it's going to appraise for about $650k. We initially put 10% down and have made only regular payments, no additional ones. By removing PMI and decreasing our rate by 5/8 (from 4.5 to 3.875), we'll save roughly $300/month in mortgage (relative to our current $2500 mortgage payment).", "summary": "How much does a $15k HELOC \"cost\" monthly, given a 3.875 interest rate and a $650k appraised home (and very good credit)."}
{"id": "t3_1z3moz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19M] just got dumped via text message by my girlfriend [18F] of almost two years. Not even two days later, she has already been on a date with someone else. How do I move on?", "post": "I've been dating her since high school, and now I'm halfway through college. Basically, revolved around each other. This breakup was a MASSIVE surprise to me and everyone else. We had never had any problems in the past, and the only reason she could give for why she was ending it was \"I feel like I'm dating my best friend, not my boyfriend.\" I have no idea how to read into this, or if I should even try.\n\nI know I need to move on, because the way she did this shows she has some major character issues that I should probably avoid, even though it really hurts.\n\nThe problem is, I don't even know where to start. After spending 10% of my entire life with her, I am completely lost. Everything I enjoyed doing was because of her, and now I'm alone. \n\nTo top it off, she's making it very clear that she's already moved on, and it's really hurting my feelings. It's like the past two years meant nothing to her. \n\nIn short, I don't really know what I'm asking. I guess I'm just venting, asking for advice, and asking for support.", "summary": "Got dumped by surprise, She's already moved on, leaving me hurt and alone, I have no idea how to start moving on."}
{"id": "t3_2icttk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25/F] just broke up with my BF [26/M] of a year and half. Why do I feel like I broke my own heart?", "post": "My (now) ex and I have been through a lot in the past year and a half. We broke up for a bit but then got back together to see if maybe we had made a mistake. After about a month I realized that nothing had changed and we were back into the same bad groove we were in before.\n\nHe was ready to start getting serious (house, ring, kids) and I wasn't sure I wanted any of those with him so I decided to break up with him. I knew I wasn't going to marry him and I didn't want to just \"be in a relationship\" to make him happy (which is what I felt like I was doing.)\n\nI broke up with him face-to-face and told him honestly how I felt and I could just see the heartbreak in his eyes. He called me every name in the book as I walked to my car, and though that should have been a sign that it wasn't a good relationship, I still ended up crying later that night because I felt so terrible.\n\nThis was our second attempt at this relationship so I know breaking it off was the right thing to do but why do I feel so fucking terrible? Will this go away? My friends tried to set me up on a date the day after the break up and I felt like it was WAY too soon to even start thinking about another relationship but they don't understand why since I was the one who broke up with him. \n\nHave any of you gone through this? How long did it take you to start feeling normal again and not like a complete asshole?", "summary": "Made the correct decision to dump my boyfriend but why do I feel like shit now? Will it get better? What are your experiences?"}
{"id": "t3_36w7c3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26 M] girlfriend[25 F] of 5 months is most likely going to end things tonight (though both of us deep down don't want it to end). Can I save this?", "post": "I've been dating my girlfriend for about 5 months, previously we had a fling a year prior, but it never developed into what we wanted until recently.  We care for each other deeply.  She is stunning, one-of-a-kind in both looks and personality, and I am deeply afraid I will never find someone like her again.  Things have been very great between us, and we do love each other. \n\nHere's the problem.  She doesn't feel I share the same feelings as she does with me.  She knows I love her, but she doesn't believe I reciprocate the same affection, attention, and overall \"caringness\" that she does.  Admittedly, it's some-what true, but it's not because I actually don't.  I just feel distracted with work, and other personal-things outside our relationship.  One particular thing is that I promised a few months back that I would buy her a new phone (hers sucks), I have yet to do so, and it upset her that I promised her something and excited her only for her to have to ask if I still planned (she's not materialistic, it's the principle of the promise.)\n\nI don't know if I've shared enough info to understand the situation, but I'm really looking for advice in what to say to her tonight.  We really don't fight ever, but this is not the first time she's felt I haven't been as committed as her.  I want to keep her.  I don't want to lose what we have, but I'm torn at how I can remedy this without sounding like I'm BS'ing/just trying to say whatever to make her happy.\n\nAny advice would be so greatly appreciated!", "summary": "Girlfriend doesn't think I reciprocate the same feelings, slightly true, she's considering ending things, still salvageable."}
{"id": "t3_1c9pdv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I've accidentally spilt ~1mg of Elemental mercury. In terms of exposure, how much trouble am I in?", "post": "*", "summary": "1mL of Mercury splattered onto a tile floor. Exposed to fumes for two hours in a small room before realising. 0.5mL of Mercury was recovered. How bad is it?"}
{"id": "t3_11i6jc", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "12 year old fox terrier with nagging cough.", "post": "This is a wall of text, so I apologise in advance. \n\nMy 12 year old fox terrier (standard size) has had a nagging cough since March of this year. At first it seemed a random cough and we chalked it up to old age. \n\nRecently it has become more persistant.  We can't seem to find a pattern, except it does seem to happen more often after he poops. It doesn't seem to matter if his motions are soft or hard.  He has always strained when pooping, mainly in his neck and back legs.  \n\nRarely, he will cough up a thick white phlegm.  This is not common, but its disturbing when he does. \n\nWe have taken him to our Vet, and they did X-rays, blood tests and a urine sample. Confirmed he does not have kennel cough, cancer, a collapsed airway or any tumors or growths in his throat.  We are given a course of antibiotics (7 day) that slightly lessened the cough. $900 later we are told he is perfectly healthy and sent home.  This was in June, and ever since it is clear he is not perfectly healthy.  \n\nHe is an indoor and outdoor dog.  He sleeps, and eats mainly in the house. He spends some of the day and does his business outside. We have one other dog (field spaniel) and two cats (one short hair, one long hair).  The other animals are 10, 6 and 4 years old respectively. They have been around since before the cough so we dont believe it is their fur or dander he is reacting too, especially as the cough is not as common when he is indoors. \n\nBasically, I would like to know if anyone else has experienced this with a pet? What was the outcome? What should I be asking Vet's to check for? I am considering taking him to the Veterinary School at SydUni, simply because I cant afford another $900 only to be sent away being told he is fine.  Still, I hate seeing him this way. \n\nThank you for any help or suggestions you can offer. Also, I do apologise for any spelling or grammar mistakes, its been a long day.", "summary": "Dog has nagging cough since March. Vet does multiple tests, gives dog an antibiotic with clear bill of health.  Dog is obviously not O.K."}
{"id": "t3_1ucycs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [24 M] break up with my girlfriend [22F] of 1 year, for a better job", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for 1 year now and I feel like we have come to a fork in our relationship. I work abroad in Europe and she is an European citizen, we met at work while she was doing an internship, finishing her bachelor. When her internship finished we still visited each other, when she told me that she wants to do an masters program in Sweden( which is really far for me). We had made an agreement to compromise that if I waited for her for 2 years to finish the master she would come back with me to America.\n\nAfter her coming to visit my family, my parents told me that the feeling they received from her is that she wouldn't come to America after school, and would make excuses to try and keep me in Europe.\n\nI currently am working at a dead end job in Europe and know that I can come back to America and make much more money and be much happier with my life, but it feel so guilty about leaving her since I made a promise that I wouldn't give her up for a job.\n\nWe recently had a big fight and it put a big strain on our relationship, but she apologized and things have been getting to how they were. I'm just confused. My parents and friends tell me I should just do what's right for me, go for the job that I really want.\n\nI still love her, and I know she really loves me.. I just feel leaving her would devastate \n\nWhat should I do?", "summary": "Stay with my girlfriend and take the risk she won't come with me after school, or get a job I love, close to my family and have a better career"}
{"id": "t3_2e06tn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm the one in the relationship that gets upset when my girlfriend doesn't return calls or texts. Me(33/M), GF(27/F)", "post": "My girlfriend is visiting her home in a different city and we are in a long distance relationship. I spoke to her last night and she told me she would call me back once she was done with her family. We always facetime before we go to bed, but she didn't call last night. I wake up this morning and haven't heard anything from her since. I've sent her texts and she's still not responding.\n\nI know I should be more patient and have the benefit of the doubt that something important could have happened to her or her phone. But after something similar that happened last week, she's testing my patience. She tells me she can't multitask. So when she is busy with people or errands, she can't take a second break to reply to my text. I'll never be able to relate to her position but I have to because I love her.\n\nI wasn't like this before though, I used to keep my cool in the beginning of the relationship and I felt like I was being respected because I wasn't chasing for her attention. But I'm going through some tough times here alone and she is someone I can open up to and talk to. I'm having to turn to other people for prayers. I know the society labels men as who are not sensitive but that is who I am and I realized I can't change core personality.\n\nI am afraid that she is losing respect for me. If she still respected me, I feel like she would try to get back to me after we had a serious talk about this. How can I get her to try harder without coming off needy? Which is not good right?", "summary": "I'm upset that GF is not trying in returning calls or texts when I'm going through hard times and want her to try harder while I am respected in her eyes."}
{"id": "t3_ckogb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I want to lose weight, where do I start?", "post": "It's summer and I've got a lot of time on my hands, I've also got some fat accumulating on my body that I really wouldn't like to be there and have a new appearance when I return to school in August. I'm a gamer so my diet is poor and I tend to sit around a lot. I've already got my diet on the way to a greener future so that is covered but thoughts are still welcome on that. I'd like to stay away from going to the gym if possible, my ultimate goal is to be thinner and look like I'm in good shape but I don't want to build a lot of muscle, so mostly cardio work I was thinking. I thought a morning jog that would go progressively further everyday would be a start but I'm unsure as I've never tried to lose weight before, doing this in the morning to me would also rid me of my laziness by forcing me to be active first thing in the morning. So anybody else that has advice or tips it'd be appreciated.", "summary": "I want to lose weight, don't want to go to a gym, I don't need muscles just to be in good shape, please help."}
{"id": "t3_4k0snh", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Can I (17M) refuse to follow a custody order?", "post": "Last year, my parents went through a pretty ugly divorce. My mother had been tired of my father for a long time, only putting up with him for the sake of me and my siblings, but recently decided that she'd had enough.\n\nMy father was never quite what I would call abusive to me in particular, but he was never exactly kind to any of us. He was, however, quite terrible at handling my sister's problems. My oldest sister (15 y/o) suffers from depression (largely due to the behaviour of my father) and so he decided that the best way to deal with that was to refuse to let her close her bedroom door under any circumstances, constantly follow her around the house, and generally worsen her situation in every way possible.\n\nHe was always very emotionally detached, and seemed to think that because he brought in money he had no reason to try to be a real father. Now that my parents have split up, he's realized that I've picked a favorite parent, and has been trying to make me feel guilty about it. On several occasions he has implied, but not directly stated, that he would consider taking away my college funds if I left him or didn't listen to him. Every time I talk to my mother about these situations, she talks to my father and then he yells at me for talking to my mom about my problems with him, even though he knows full well that he is not approachable.\n\nI will turn 18 in July and will be able to choose where to stay then, but I can't put up with him any longer, and I do not trust him around my sister. Currently, there is a court ordered custody ruling that requires us to spend every other week with our father. Is there any way to contest this ruling, or to refuse to follow it?\n\nI live in Pennsylvania, I can give more specific location information if it is required but I don't want to be too specific in case my father somehow finds this.", "summary": "My father is a terrible person but has a court ordered custody ruling requiring me to stay with him every other week, can I get away from him?"}
{"id": "t3_fz6ap", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the best job for a versatile geek?", "post": "Job+profession sucks - now what? What's the best profession for a geek?\n\nI'm a male teacher in my mid thirties. I've long been speculating that my job isn't the right one. As I've found that reddit is a place with a lot of people a lot like me (YAY!) I've come to the hive mind for answers... Some of you must be in a profession where I could be of good use :D\n\nI have the gift of being very versatile. This means that I'm above average in almost everything. No matter the sucjebt I feel pretty up-to-date. It has the downside that I'm an expert in nothing at all :(  The only thing I can do better than most people is learning. If I set my mind to it, I can pick up new stuff very fast. I have some experience in electronics and computers (web + programming + hardware support). I have a lot of experience (8 years) in teaching physics, biology and math to kids (13-16 yo.). I have life long experience in outdoor activities (scouting and hiking etc.).\n\nI love teaching when there is flow - when it clicks between myself and the students. Trouble is that it's not always like this. A lot of times it's just a set curriculum with tests and documentation etc. The fun part of teaching is not the biggest part unfortunately. When I sit hour after hour putting check marks next to questions on tests I feel stupid because a trained monkey could do the same job. I am good at problem solving and abstract thinking, but I almost never use this ability. And this is what it really comes down to: I want to use my mind in a better way :)\n\nI have thought about teaching older kids - maybe at a technical college or something - trouble is that most of these places require a candidate degree or something like that - and I don't have it. Going back to school to get a degree is out of the question due to house+kids and the need of a steady income. \n\nSo - any bright ideas or warnings? Long time redditor here - just using a throwaway in case of colleagues on reddit :)", "summary": "I want a new profession. I'm your typical geek who's really really good at a lot of things, but an expert in nothing at all. What's the best ideas?"}
{"id": "t3_51hg7r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] am feeling financially inadequate compared to my long distance boyfriend [24M] of 9ish months.", "post": "Super quick background: we got together spring of our senior year of undergrad, knowing full well we weren't sure where either of us would end up after graduation. So we planned to break up mutually and amicably at the end of the summer. And we did. I moved away for grad school, but we still remained best friends and talked every day. Almost a year later, we decided to get back together despite the hardship of distance.\n\nIt's going fantastically. But I'm feeling a lot of guilt about how unequal our relationship is due to finances. Being in grad school, I have barely enough income for basic needs. He's making very decent money at his full time job. When we first got together, it was important to me to split costs evenly, alternating who pays for dates, going Dutch, etc. But now he pays for most things and I feel so guilty. (Spoiled and well taken care of, too! but not comfortably.) Most recently, he flew out to see me, and when we discussed the next time we'd see each other, he immediately bought tickets to fly me out to his city. It makes me feel like I owe him. I think it's important to note that these feelings are only on my end. He does this completely willingly, and he does not mind at all paying for things. He considers it an investment in our time spent together, and not just for my benefit.\n\nI'm looking for advice on how I can deal with feeling inadequate until I graduate (one more year!) and can contribute financially to our relationship. Do I just try to find peace with it? Do you try to make up for it?", "summary": "long distance boyfriend bought me plane tickets without a second thought and I feel guilty. How do you deal with inequality in a relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_34f52o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23f) with my fiance (28m) considering calling it quits over lack of sex.", "post": "Throw away because he's a frequent redditor. \n\nI knew when we began dating that my libido was much higher than his. Now, 3 years later, I'm already afraid I'm gonna end up spending my nights lurking r/deadbedrooms. I've been sexually curious since a young age. I masturbate often. I enjoy watching porn. I like my fair share of kink. Him? Not so much.\n\nAbout a year ago I started on a new medicine that's lowered my libido. I don't find myself browsing erotic stories or enjoying my afternoons alone with my internet browser.\nThis is fine. If anything it's nice to not have sex on the brain nearly 24/7. \nHowever, now that I'm not always dressing up, initiating, or sending dirty texts throughout the day to get him excited, our sex life has nearly come to a halt. Generally, once a week or so is all I get. The last spectacular week that comes to mind we had sex 4 times, but this was after a long discussion about me feeling sexually unsatisfied; wanting more sex in general and for it to be less vanilla. \n\nWhen we do have sex it's usually good, but he never wants it unless it's night time and we're in the bedroom. Even then he has trouble with getting/keeping an erection and sometimes won't even reach orgasm. Not to mention no midnight nookie, no morning sex, and minimal affection outside the bedroom. \n\nWhenever I bring up my issues with this he always says he just has a low sex drive and not to make him feel bad for it. I understand the low libido, but short of vigorous masurbation I'm not sure how to stay satisfied and faithful. (Having an open relationship is out of the question for him.)\n\nThe other aspects of our relationship are fine. I love him to pieces. There's no bullshit drama, we share most of the same values, and despite our differences we tend to compliment each other's personalities rather well. There's really not many complaints to have about him, other than our lack of intamacy. However, the lack of sex and general desire are leaving me extrodinarily unsatisfied...", "summary": "I feel shallow and sad for considering leaving the man I love, and ending an otherwise great relationship, over a lack of sex."}
{"id": "t3_c031n", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Ex-friends are badmouthing my relationship, they like my GF more, and constantly tell her she deserves better.", "post": "Some history I guess, we met in High School, and I graduated last year, while she graduated a year before.  During the time I was still in school, she was working, but had quite a few days off, so she spent those days visiting me and the ex-friends(before they were Ex) at school.\n\n  \n         \n  Fast forward, we're out of school, doing some upgrading at a place called Center High, which is like outreach for highschool, and those friends are now ex-friends, mainly because they, for some reason I'm unaware of, don't like ME anymore, but have no issue with my GF.  I don't speak to them anymore, but they speak to my GF.  Not saying I have an issue with that, it's nice to know that she has a group of people to back her up if we ever break up.\n        \n  \n  Lately, they've been telling her things like she deserves better, or I'm always a jerk to her(ok, this one is completely untrue, and she knows it.)  One of them(a girl) has even asked her out to dinner this Thursday, to give her some \"advice\" about the relationship.  I'm worried that this \"advice\" will lead to our breakup which neither of us want, but if things go wrong, it'll happen.  What do I do about us, and is it wrong to ask her not to go to that dinner?", "summary": "Ex-friends are telling my GF of 3 years that I'm not worth it.  One of said ex-friends giving her \"advice\" which may lead to our breakup."}
{"id": "t3_uelqi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I unintentionally cheated on my GF, was going to tell her. But someone else beat me to the punch. help?", "post": "me (M 21) and my GF (F 21) have been going strong for a couple months now, but she recently went abroad which I have no problem waiting for her to come back because I really like this girl a lot! But last week I did the worst thing known to mankind and I got a little bit too drunk, to the point where I only remember bits and pieces of the night. The original plan was just to stay home and drink, but my best friend wanted to check out a nearby bar/club. Which I had no issues with because I was already starting to feel the effects of the alcohol, so it just seemed like a good time to go out and have fun with my friend especially since we haven't been able to do that in a couple weeks. \n\nSo he drove us out to the club, where I continued to drink, and drink, and drink. To the point where I was way past shitty, long story short (from what I was told) I found a chick and told her where I lived and invited her back. She came over with her wingwomens, we did the dirty, and they all left. \n\nI have 2 issues with this: my friend probably pressured me into doing the dirty, because he's done this type of thing to other people before to try and break them up with their girlfriends. AND I was only able to talk to my GF 2 times within a week because of our schedules. the first time was the day after and I didn't have the courage to tell her then, but I was going to tell her the next time we spoke, but one of the wonderful wingwomens from the club beat me to the punch and sent her a message on facebook about it 10 minutes before we talked the second time.\n\nNow this is where I thought it got complicated though. I have never before cheated on a GF and hate those who do. She knows that I was to blackout drunk, through me telling her and the message (I don't even remember having sex with the chick) and what my friend has done in the past. Is there anyway I can get her trust back for this horrible accident that I don't even remember happening?", "summary": "I cheated on my girlfriend, but I was way past drunk and don't remember doing it and the my wingman who was supposed to help his drunk friend pressured me into doing it. help? ilikethisgirlalot!"}
{"id": "t3_hejov", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Volunteer options for biologists - any advice/experience?", "post": "I just finished my undergrad degree in Biology - specifically ecology and evolution - and want to take some time off to get some experience while at the same time just trying something totally new. I'm looking for something that I can spend somewhere in the neighbourhood of a few months to a year in a place completely different and far away (I'm in Montreal).\n\nI've been looking for good volunteer spots for a while, but most of the ones I've been finding seems to require a couple thousand dollars just to volunteer (on top of airfare), something I can't exactly afford at this point in time. Anything that has room and board paid for is perfect for me, and I'm willing to work extremely hard and give up a lot of my time helping.\n\nI am only fluent in English unfortunately, though I can manage in French if required. I am willing to go anywhere in the world, and would like things in the realm of behavioural ecology or conservation biology.\n\nEx: [Kalahari Meerkat Project] - something like this is what I'm looking for more or less.", "summary": "Want to volunteer not *volunteer vacation*, any advice on where to look and any experience doing anything likes this is appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_sd2q9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, please, help me find a way to not e terrified of loans!", "post": "I'm a 22 year old student, about to graduate with a bachelors in Criminology. \n\nI absolutely LOVED what I studied. I learned my school's department of Criminology is amazing and I have learned so much from the faculty. The only problem is I know I'll have to go to grad school to get the career I strive for.. which is working with bomb/food/drug dogs.\n\nThe thing is, I was incredibly blessed with parents who helped me pay for my college degree without taking out loans. Hearing about my friends and their loans makes me cringe. I don't understand how college grads are okay with going to school, graduating with the difficulty of finding a job, and paying off their loans.. all in turn with paying their living expenses. I know you can defer these loans but I still find it incredibly terrifying. \n\nI have friends entering programs for their doctorates, and I don't understand how they aren't panicking. Most of all, its for my friends who are working towards entering vet schools. Entering a veterinary program was my original goal, but I switched to criminology in hopes I could work with food/bomb/drug dogs. I would LOVE to be a vet, and have worked in various animal hospitals throughout my lifetime. So I'm a bit stuck as to whether I should start over or continue in my Criminology degree.", "summary": "How can I chill out about thinking about potential loans in my future life? What can make me believe I need to take out loans and do so for my education, without being so scared?"}
{"id": "t3_1uamb0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (f25) dont know if im overanalyzing or if my bf (m25) really means what he says", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for 9 ish months now. We love each other and I guess im more vocal about it than he is. I am the one that says I love you or I miss you first, and he responds with I miss you more or love you more, or ditto.\n\nIt just really bothers me, because I feel like i know he feels that way, but then I feel like he doesnt feel that way. Ive brought it up with him and he says it stresses him out but he only says it a few times to make it more special. It just bothers me cause he just....never says it until I do.\n\nIm also pretty insecure and my last boyfriend just kind of treated me like a piece of meat, and broke up with me cause he never loved me, so i feel sort of hurt and I feel like this is one sided when I always initiate my feelings and he rarely doesnt.\n\nAm I reading too much into this? How should I approach this?", "summary": "boyfriend rarely says I love you, and normally says it after I do. Not sure if its an insecurity thing with myself or an actual problem"}
{"id": "t3_3aqm9g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I(24F) attend my boyfriend's grandmother's last birthday celebration?", "post": "My boyfriend (24M) and I have been dating for a few years now and talk about getting married several years down the line. I am on good terms with his family and he with mine. His mother is throwing a big birthday celebration for her mother (my boyfriend's maternal grandmother) at the end of the summer, and his mom invited me. My boyfriend's grandmother is in poor health, and this is likely to be her last birthday, so this is also kind of an opportunity for everyone to say their goodbyes. My boyfriend hasn't seen his grandmother in 10 years, since she lives far away, and I've never met her before.\n        \nI was fine with attending before I found out that it's being held on the other side of the country and airfare will run $500+ (that was the price when we checked a couple of weeks ago so it's likely higher now). I'll be paying for my own airplane ticket. I'm currently in med school right now living off student loans, and money is tight. In order to go, I will have to take time off my summer job, and I'll be digging into my loans. \n         \nI feel like I should go, since my boyfriend's whole family (including his brother's fiancee) is going to be there, and I'll presumably be a part of that family in the future. I'm worried his mother will be upset if I don't go and will forever hold that against me. My parents don't think it's a big deal, and say I shouldn't be obligated to go since I'm not married or in the process of marrying into the family at this time. My boyfriend doesn't think it's a huge deal either. What do you guys think? I just want to make sure I don't alienate the people who are my future in-laws.", "summary": "Boyfriend's mother is having a last birthday party for her mother across the country, and I can't really afford the airfare. Can I bow out without pissing off potential-future-MIL?"}
{"id": "t3_lyaj9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Something to keep my mom busy?", "post": "Long Backstory:\n\nMy mom's best friend died about six months ago, our 12 year old Sheltie. About a month ago, she decided she was ready to get a new dog, so we adopted a beagle/pug mix puppy. Between getting up at 5a.m. to go to school, studying/doing homework, working out, and having a social life, I didn't have much time to help take care of it. My mother and second eldest sister are both disabled, so they can't work, and were suppose to take care of the dog that *they* wanted. Between them two, and my eldest sister, who is a home-health-aid for my mom and lives with us, she apparently was too much to handle, and I was harrased by them to help more, even though I didn't have too much time. They also didn't consider the fact that I'm alergic to dogs, and could hardly touch her. Anyway, the dog was always biting my hands, but no one cared... until she bit my eldest sister. They just returned her because of this, and my mom is upset... because, even how much she complained about it, she loved the dog. My eldest sister's cat absolutely loves my mom, and is always cuddling with her and not my sister, which also causes problems, but that is apparently not good enough. She is now mad at *me* for not helping out, even though I'm alergic to dogs and break out whenever one scratches/bites me, something the dog was notorious/returned for. I know I went on a tangent there, but I'm trying to ask, what are some things that will keep my mom busy?", "summary": "My mom gets lonely during the day, so is there anything I can get her/do for her to help her be less lonely and keep her busy?"}
{"id": "t3_2ad1mt", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not putting my apartment number in my shipping info.", "post": "This happened two weeks ago and I've been doing damage control since. \n\nI was looking to buy some hobby stuff and found something good and inexpensive on eBay. I didn't have an eBay account and created one that day and bought the item using my card -- processed by Paypal. \n\nA few days pass and I constantly check the tracking information as my package gets closer and closer to my city. Finally, it's out for delivery. I leave the apartment to go to work and decide to check the mail once I get home.\n\nSo there I am, 1:30 AM, and no package. \n\nI was upset. I was so sure that the tracking said it was out for delivery before I went to work at 4:00 PM so it should be there, but it wasn't. I checked for a claim slip in case the package didn't fit in my box at the complex and I had to pick it up at the post office, but no, nothing.\n\nI went home and checked tracking again to see what happened, and there it was, \"Undeliverable as Address\".\n\nI grew even more upset because they were here. They had to have been here while I was out for them to know that it was undeliverable here. \n\nThen, as I'm cursing the seller and the shipper, I notice something wrong with my shipping address on eBay. I didn't add my apartment number. Why... why did I do that? It was in my billing address, but for some reason I didn't put it in my shipping address. Just... dammit.\n\nI've messaged the seller, created a case on eBay, and even messaged the post office, but nothing. No one seems to have any idea where my package went. It should have returned to the seller, but he hasn't said anything except sent me the tracking information.\n\nIt's now been two weeks, and nothing. Still.", "summary": "Ordered something off of eBay, realized too late that I didn't include my shipping address, my package is now in some sort of limbo."}
{"id": "t3_3fvm6k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Are my [21 F] feelings for my boyfriend [22 M] of 3 years normal?", "post": "A bit of background -\n\nMy boyfriend and I have been together since we graduated from high school. What attracted me the most was his incredible sense of humor and how charming he was. He made me feel very special.\n\nFast forward 3 years and I feel suffocated 90% of the time. He hates my friends.. I can't catch up with them without being constantly questioned or called 2 times (in the space of up to an hour). He expects me to update him on my every movement (I'm on the bus. I'm getting off the bus. I'm walking to college. I'm in my classroom) and if I don't he'll get very cold and short. I can't connect with male college friends on social media accounts because \"I shouldn't have to\" etc.\n\nI am at the end of my college degree and am desperate for work experience interstate or overseas. I want to experience the world and different workplaces and set up a steady career. He was not interested in college and, while he does work currently, he has no set goals or ambitions for what he wants to do in the future.\n\nHe has recently started making friends with horrible people (violent bikies, ex-cons, drug dealers). His mood can switch in an instant - from something as small as me walking too fast or not holding his hand in public. The jokes he makes are no longer funny but offensive and rude. \n\nI can't help but feel stuck, unsure and maybe even deserving of something better and more fulfilling. I feel horrible writing that because I should love him no matter what. I'm just very confused.\n\nHas anyone been in this position? Is this a phase? Any advice would be appreciated.", "summary": "The dynamics of my relationship have changed and we have grown in different ways. Is this a phase or is it the end of the road?"}
{"id": "t3_f9bty", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Pulled over because I looked, \"Too young to be driving such a nice car.\" Are police allowed to do that?", "post": "Hey Reddit.\n\nA couple of days ago, I was at a red light, minding my own business when a cop car pulls up beside me into the left turning lane. I turn to look at the cop, and both her and her partner are staring at me. I just ignore it as the lights turn green and they turn left as I go straight. A couple of seconds later, I see in my rear view mirror that they pull a 360 in the middle of the intersection and their lights turn on. I assume they got a distress call until they start tailing me. I know I did nothing wrong because I went when the light was green and I was only doing about 55 - 60KM in a 50KM zone (Yes, I am in Canada).\n\nI pull over into the nearest parking lot and turn off my car. One of the police officers starts to walk up to my window, so I open it up just about an inch. The officer asks for my licence and registration, which I proceed to get for him. I ask him, \"What seems to be the problem officer?\" to which he responds, no problem, just doing a checkup.\" \"A checkup for what,\" I ask. He sais, \"Well, you look a little young to be driving such a nice car.\" I am 18 and I drive my parents 04 [Acura TL](\n\nI was floored, because this is not the first time this has happened to me, more like my third.\n\nHere is my question to you Reddit. Are the police allowed to pull me over to do a \"check up\" because I look too young to be driving a nice car? The car was not reported stolen or anything like that.", "summary": "Got pulled over because I am 18 years old and drive a luxury sedan. Are the 5-0 allowed to pull me over for basically no reason?"}
{"id": "t3_3hsuwt", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "In need of advice for college finances", "post": "Im going to try to keep this short but please let me know if I left out any important information. I am a high school senior and am considering going to the university of Alabama for a STEM to MBA program. I would have a full tuition scholarship with only about 8k/year expenses for room and board. I would prefer to get a degree in software engineering with the MBA. I was wondering if it would be worth it to go to a top-tier university for the same credentials or if saving the money is a better option in the long run. \n-Alabama~32k total for education\n-Prestigious university- 80-200k+ depending on scholarships available.\n-I have 34 ACT/ 2250 SAT and 3.9 unweighted GPA if it matters \n-I will have $70k at my disposal to use for college", "summary": "Is getting certification from a more \"prestigious\" university worth the insane amount of debt I would be getting myself into?"}
{"id": "t3_1whxt4", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "6 Months and I'm just not happy. How do I [M20] break up with her, without her [f20] or her friends hating me?", "post": "I'm a sophomore in college, and I started dating a girl (Let's call her Jenny) this past August, and we rushed into things.\nNow, I don't know what I really want or need out of a relationship, so I don't want to be in a relationship in general right now until I figure things out in my life. She's also not really who I thought she was, not as confident or independent as she first seemed. And I simply don't enjoy being with her anymore.\n\nWhy it's complicated: I was her first boyfriend, took her virginity (she'd only ever kissed like 3 guys before me), and we told each other we loved each other. She says it a lot. She's sort of dependent, and doesn't know how a relationship should work. I don't either, I've never been in healthy/happy ones. Only time I \"broke up\" with someone, I'd been seeing her for 2 months and just stopped responding to calls and texts and defriended her on Facebook (awful I know, we've reconciled since then (it was 3 years ago)) and I've been moving from relationship to romantic interest to relationship since like junior year of highschool.\n\n I want to be able to focus on my own life. \n\nAnyway, all of my friends who are girls are in her sorority, so I don't want all of them to hate me for breaking up with Jenny. There's also an extracurricular club, that Jenny is in with me, and we're going on a 5 day trip for that club in two weeks (Jenny, Me, and 4 other members of club were selected). Our 6 month anniversary will be in a week AND valentine's day is the day before the trip so I don't want Jenny to be alone, hating me right before the trip. \n\nHow do I break up with her, without all our mutual friends (her sorority sisters) hating me, and without it being super awkward in committee meetings or when we see each other?", "summary": "How do I break up with her without it being super awkward after, and without losing friends +should I wait until after 6 month anniversary (1 week away) & Valentine's day  (2 weeks away)?"}
{"id": "t3_2hq08y", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by talking to a highschool friend", "post": "First off I am a horrible story teller so bear with me.\n\nSo this happened a couple hours ago, I'm still not sure what to think. I attended highschool in a rather small town, so everyone there knew each other, and after I graduated I went to a local university. Now being young and wanting to get out of the house I decided to live on campus for the first year (or four).\n\nSmall town kid at an okay sized university I get pretty excited when I see someone I know from my town, so naturally I was pretty happy to bump into a girl, let's call her kat, in my building working on the janitorial staff, that I went to school with. She was about to go on break and I had a bit of time while I waited for my laundry so we sat in the longue and talked for a few minutes, right before she left her coworkers walked into the building (there are large glass windows so we can see who comes in/out).\n\nKat decides to cut her break short and go back to work, and I go upstairs to swap out my laundry. When I come back down the stairs as soon as I open the door I am confronted by a group of the cleaning staff and who I am assuming is security. They start asking me where Kat is and get upset when I don't know (why would I know where the cleaning staff is...) and then tell me I have to leave the premise because employees can't bring guests on campus. After explaining to them that I live here I was told that I should respect the fact that cleaning staff are here to work and not bother them. \n\nA few minutes later I decided to go up to join a group going for lazer tag and as I walked towards the staircase I hear screaming and crying \"I can't lose my job no no no!\" and I'm pretty sure it was Kat. I have no idea but I think I got her fired by talking to her for 10 minutes on her break.", "summary": "The broom and mop mob wasn't impressed that on of their own had friends that go to the univeristy."}
{"id": "t3_2o4z3f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Scared to have a daughter for irrational reason..", "post": "Figured relationships would be a better sub than sex even though it's kind of centered around sex..\n\nI [20M] have a [15F] sister who I've always seen as innocent. Today I realized that even though I gladly know nothing of her sex life(existent or not) she isn't a 9 year old girl who doesn't know what sex is. I then started browsing Reddit and saw a post about how a dad had discovered his daughter pretty much riding her boyfriend. I thought about how not only our dad but a ton of dads are probably devastated that their \"little girl\" is having sex. At this point I was for some reason really angry and didn't know why. It then dawned on me that I was thinking about my future and if I were to catch my daughter in the act of sex I would probably punch a hole in the wall as to not make a scene...(Obviously kidding but would be really upset non the-less) \n\nNow I'm feeling guilty because if I had a son and I caught him having sex I'd be fine with it, maybe even a little proud. I'm feeling guilty because this is a huge double standard and at my current age, heck even when I was in high school I knew of plenty of girls who were sexually active and didn't see it as a big deal. I know I'm being completely irrational about this seeing as how I don't even have any kids, but I was wondering if anyone had any input on why I was getting so worked up over something that could be 25 years down the line? \n\nI think I'd be fine if I was kind of oblivious to it.. i.e. NOT walking in on my daughter doing cowgirl in my own home.. I'm not a violent person nor would I do anything to this theoretical kid having sexy times with my theoretical daughter, but if I were to see it happen I would just flip.. Any insight or experience dealing with the realization that your daughter is sexually active for when the future comes around?", "summary": "Thought about catching my future theoretical daughter having sex, proceed to get upset out of thin air, now wondering if this is something that happens to all dads/ what are ways to deal with the realization?"}
{"id": "t3_exxka", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Best Car Insurance For New Driver?", "post": "I am a 21 year old South American male moving to Charlotte for an internship opportunity. While I haven't really needed to drive back home (I relied on public transportation almost exclusively and cars are too expensive!) I now have to get a car.\n\nIve managed to actually get a cheap car (96 Civic) to move around, but now the next step is to get it insured when I get there. I am not the kind of person to ask before googling, but Ive got nothing from my searches. A few websites providing quotes, but nothing too helpful.\n\nThe problem? 21, Never insured, no US Driving experience. Ergo, the 200 p/month numbers Im getting. I understand I might not get something much cheaper, but that would be ideal. If not, maybe share your insights on why go for company A or B?", "summary": "21 year old first time driver looking for insurance. Cheap (under 200 a month) would be ideal, if not recommend your favorite company or share your experiences about the subject."}
{"id": "t3_te5qj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Found out something that would definitely end my friend's relationship with his girlfriend, possibly his brother. What the hell to do?", "post": "Throwaway, just in case someone sees this. A friend of mine broke up with his girlfriend a few months ago. A few days later, said friend's brother and ex had sex. It was apparently a one-time thing, and they were both drunk (not an excuse in my book). Normally, I would mind my own damn business, except that my friend recently got back together with this girl. If it was me, and my brother did this, I would want to know. Now, I know his brother, we're not close, but I know him well enough to know that he will never fess up; I highly doubt the girl will, either, but I feel like my friend needs to know about this.  \n\n  It gets messier. My friend and his brother live together with a few other people, and also work at the same place of business, so somebody will have to move out and get a new job. I just don't see any of it ending well for anybody. The source I heard this from is as reliable as it gets, there is no doubt that it happened. I wish I never would have heard, but I feel as though I now have a responsibility to my friend to let him know. I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around this incredibly fucked-up situation, and thought I'd ask Reddit for advice. Should I tell him anonymously? I fear he wouldn't believe it from an anonymous source. I'm also worried that the ensuing meltdown could be blamed on me for sticking my nose where it doesn't belong. Thoughts, suggestions?", "summary": "Friend's brother had his three-day old table scraps. Now the lucky couple are back together and my friend is none the wiser. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1rqr3m", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [18/m] at university and confused about whether or not I should pursue my crush, who is [18/f]", "post": "First time posting here. Sorry if I mess up on formatting, and thanks in advance!\n\nSo, like it says in the title, I'm a nineteen year old male in his second year of university. I volunteer with an eighteen year old girl in her first year. Recently, in the past couple of months, I've developed a pretty big crush on her. Normally, I would ask her out and see how it goes. If she says yes, great! If she says no, it's no big deal.\n\nThe problem is, we're in the same program, and it's one of the smallest programs in the country. Even though we're in different years, everyone knows everyone and gossip gets around fast. It would be embarrassing if she did happen to say \"no,\" and everyone knew about it. I know that might sound like a stupid thing to worry about, but I can't help it.\n\nI also don't know if she feels the same way about me. We haven't really hung out alone, but I think we generally enjoy each other's company (as friends), although that doesn't really say much. I had drunk talks with my female housemates about her, because they're semi-good friends with her, and they both told me to go for it. We were all intoxicated, though, so it might not be the best advice. One of my friends in first year also talked to her, and he told me that he wasn't sure about what I should do. I don't know if that means that he thinks she's not interested but he's too nice to say so, or something else.\n\nI know this sounds really stupid and very high-school-y, but I was in a terrible relationship for most of first year, and this is my first crush since we broke up. I haven't really been exposed to university dating life, so I'm pretty nervous. So, sorry again if this seems silly or childish, and thanks for the advice!", "summary": "Crushing on girl, but we have many mutual friends and I'm worried about the embarrassment if she rejects me, because word would get around."}
{"id": "t3_4wfosj", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "New to the US in deep need of guidance", "post": "Hello personal finance saviors \n\nMy story is:\n\nMe and my fianc\u00e9e decided to move to the United States[Kansas] (she's a US citizen while I am from Egypt) the system of finance in my country is totally different I have been always relying on debit cards and saving account hence spending only what I have and managing to save as much as I can. \n\nThe situation is that I managed to save around 5k USD (not that much but that's around 50k of my national currency). \nMy fianc\u00e9e in contrary is spending a lot on lots of unnecessary stuff for example buys new clothes every month or so and she is in big debt (university loans and whatnot) but since we are marrying soon after I come to the US (next month) I am totally in the dark side of the financial stuff like what do I do with my savings? Just open a normal savings account? Which bank do I use[Kansas state]? and what are the investment opportunities? Is joint account going to be risky for me giving the inputs above ? Taking into consideration that I won't have work until I get my permission. I am not asking for specific tailored responses I am willing to put as much research as I need I just need some guidance on where I can search for options to choose from. Some responses that could familiarize me with the financial sector would be great. \n(I apologize if there are any mistakes in my post)", "summary": "moving to the US with my future wife having small savings of 5k USD but know absolutely nothing about financial life in the US "}
{"id": "t3_s7hp7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Confused about a sudden broken 2-year friendship, could you guys help me understand?", "post": "To start things off, I am a 21 year old college undergrad that has very little experience in relationships in general. But I met this fantastic woman (she's 20) in one of my courses about 2 years ago (same major) and got to be friends with her until about 5 months ago.\n\nWe did everything together: studied together, hanged out, played video-games, you name it. But everything came crashing down when I decided that I wanted to let her know how much I fell in love with her. I knew I had little chance with this woman (she's very attractive), but it was worth a shot asking her out for a few dates.\n\nNevertheless, I gathered all the courage in the world, and told her how I felt and if she would give me a chance to go out with her. Her face had the most soul-crushing expression I have ever witnessed. She blankly stared at me, and went away without any explanation at all. I tried contacting her afterwards to apologize if I did something wrong, but she never answered my calls, texts, messages, etc. And everytime I see her (again, we study the same major) she avoids me like the plague.\n\nSo I've been a depressed and confused since that day, wishing never to have said that, among other things. I do miss our friendship a lot. And I thought by trying to forget everything about her and move on would help, but I still see her now and then, wondering why did our friendship end all of a sudden. What do you guys think that happened to her? Why does she have feelings of resentment on me now?", "summary": "met awesome girl, best of friends for about 2 years, told her if she wanted to go out with me, never responded, broken friendship, help me understand what could've happened to her?"}
{"id": "t3_32dsq5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] am wondering if my parents should be covering my healthcare.", "post": "Don't want to sound like an entitled brat or anything as I've pretty much been financially supporting myself for the past 3 years. \n\nHowever, I have been uninsured for the past 5-6 years. \n\nMy parents and I have a pretty good relationship. I live in NYC and they are in the midwest. When healthcare signup came through 2 years ago they signed up themselves and my younger sister but not me. They told me that it's going to be \"too expensive\" to have me on their plan (seems like it's almost $200 a month extra) and they said to apply through the government program or through my work. Both of these cost me more than $200 a month. I can afford it but I won't be able to put in over $100 in my savings account every month anymore.\n\nShould I be mad? I don't know really how to feel because I don't *expect* them to do anything for me, but it seems like everyone was very happy when the new government healthcare plans allowed people to keep their kids on until they were like 26.", "summary": "Should parents help their young adult children out with insurance if they're capable of it? What if the child can afford it but it's more expensive than their plan?"}
{"id": "t3_g53r3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Student teaching in a school with a very strict website filter.  Making it impossible to teach well.  Any advice?", "post": "I am currently student teaching in a school with a very strict website filter.  This filter extends to teachers as well as students.\n\nThings which I cannot access:\n\n* Any website that plays videos (I was hoping to show historical videos.)\n\n* Google (Including: the search engine, Google Video, GMail, etc.)\n\n* Anything with the word \"sex\" in the url (e.g. a CNN article about sexual assault)\n\n* Anything with the word \"discriminate\" in the url\n\n* Anything with the word \"aids\" in the url (I tried to search for \"hearing aids\" yesterday, and it would not let me.  It did, however, let me search \"hearing aid.\")\n\n* Any e-mail server (GMail, my school's e-mail system [@psu.edu], Yahoo Mail, etc. - I cannot send or receive e-mails while at school, which seriously impedes my work)\n\n* Most educational websites (Discovery channel website, History channel website, PBS website, etc.)\n\n**FOR SOME REASON THAT I DO NOT UNDERSTAND**, Reddit is accessible.  Likely because the IT guy in charge of the school's internet is a Redditor.  Given Reddit's collective intelligence, I was hoping that someone could help me get around this filter somehow so that I can actually teach lessons that I believe will interest my students.\n\nWhen I was in high school, there was a filter on our internet, but it was NOT this bad.  Because I cannot access Google, I cannot just use the cache function.  However, I do remember using certain websites that would allow you to get around the filter.", "summary": "School's web filter blocks almost every website in existence, making it impossible to teach.  Does anyone know of a website to get around this?"}
{"id": "t3_3uy4iz", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "I know it's creepy if a guy blows up your phone, but is it creepy if a guy suddenly drops his frequency of contact?", "post": "So I have this friend who happens to be a woman. She's 24, I'm 26. We've been friends for  a little under 2 years now. The friendship is mutual, seeing that she's initiated  plans with me quite a bit. So I want to clear that out of the way, so everyone knows that I'm not some NiceGuy that follows this girl around. \n\nThe last time we hung out was when we met at a party last Saturday. Before that she hung out at my place 3 weeks ago for a movie and to match weed bowls (matching is where I smoke my weed with you, and you smoke your weed with me). We usually talk twice a week or so. If we aren't in person, we talk via text. It's been over a week and I haven't said anything. Not because I don't want to talk to her, but I haven't had time to really make plans, and I don't really have a whole lot to say. I'm also socially anxious and a tad insecure, so another reason why I haven't reached out is due to fear of annoying her. \n\nI would like to go ahead and reach out sometime soon, to keep the friendship afloat, but I don't want to be annoying/creepy. Again, maybe it's my own social anxiety making me over think things. But I am coming here to reddit to get a second opinion on whether it's just my own anxiety, or if I have a point. \n\nSo women, is it creepy if a dude doesn't text you at all, especially if you expect the guy likes you? Would you assume he's playing some game, or that he's just living his life?", "summary": "Is it off-putting if a guy you normally talk to doesn't text you at all for longer than normal?"}
{"id": "t3_51dx8f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] cheated on my girlfriend [18 F] ,1 year 9 mo. old relationship, and want to know how to fix it.", "post": "Like many incoming 18 year olds, I just entered college, while also leaving my girlfriend, a senior in high school, behind. Since we didn't want to lose a relationship that's almost 2 years old, we decided that we still wanted to try to stay together, and try to see each other often (1 hr. long drive)\n\nAfter being here two weeks, one of my new friends, who happened to be a girl, got dumped and wanted to talk to someone. Being me, I offered, and we went back to her dorm to talk. After a few hours of comforting, she started getting touchy, and unfortunately, so did I. We ended up doing everything but intercourse.\n\nImmediately after, and even now, a few days later, I feel absolutely terrible and wracked with guilt, as I still love my girlfriend with all of my being. I know I made a terrible, terrible mistake, one that neither of us will ever forget. No amount of excuses explains my behavior, and I deserve anything she'll potentially tell me.\n\nWhat I'm here for, is for advice on how to salvage the relationship, if that's even possible. She's coming up to visit me this weekend, and I would rather not do it via text, as I feel that doesn't exactly convey emotion well. I plan on telling her as soon as she's up here, as I feel waiting is going to make it worse.\n\nIf you have any advice at all, please share it with me. I don't want to lose her.", "summary": "Cheated on high-school girlfriend while at college, regrets it immensely, any advice on how to fix relationship is welcome."}
{"id": "t3_3i1diu", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by using my hands when talking on a first date.", "post": "TIFU but recovered. Ok, So there I am......on a first date. This was a date that was essentially set up for us, so we had never talked to each other before other than text. Generally, I suck at talking to girls and I'm a pretty shy person in general. \n\nSo I pick her up, and everything is turning out pretty well. I'm actually on fire. I'm talking really well, coming up with subjects where I normally draw blanks, and making her laugh. We're drinking the first round of beers and getting pretty comfortable. The bar is pretty packed and so the whole time we were kind of leaning against the wall. So we go to get the second round and afterwards a table has opened up. \n\nAt this point I'm feeling great and I'm really opening up and using my hands to talk a lot. I tend to get animated when I do talk. So here we are with totally fresh beers having a great conversation. I can't even remember what we're talking about and mid-sentence I'm waving my arms around and knock my entire beer over. The table is totally dry. The glass perfectly tips towards me and spills entirely all over my body. YES, some got on her, but for the most part I'm soaked. \n\nI'm speechless and my body is tingling from the embarrassment I'm feeling. So then she pulls the most suave move I've seen a girl do in a while. She picks up the glass, pours half her beer in, and says, \"let's drink this quick and go for a walk so you can dry off.\" Anyways, we end up staying out way late, drinking more, and making out.", "summary": "I got a little buzzed and really animated when talking and spilled a fresh beer all over myself. Thought I was doomed, girl ended up being awesome about the whole thing."}
{"id": "t3_2m4jjn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23 M] husband recently told me [24 F] that he wants to join the Air Force. He also wants me to make the decision of yes or no...", "post": "To start, my husband and I have only been married about 6 months. Before we got married, he was planning for a while to go into the Marines and then halfway through our engagement changed his mind. He decided he was going to go into law enforcement as a career instead. He tried to get into the police department in Colorado Springs, where we recently moved to, and didn't get in. We started making plans on moving back to Michigan where his family is and he could try there.\n\nWe got talking the other night about our future plans and he told me he wants to join the Air Force and has been thinking about it the past few months. He wants me to think about it and make a decision on if he can do so or not. He said he would wait to join until we moved back so I could be close to my family and friends when he goes to boot camp. \n\nAfter he said no about going into the Marines, I kind of \"washed my hands\" of any idea with the armed forces. I really don't want him to, but he said that he fears if I say no, then years down the line, he may start to resent me.  I want to have kids in about 3 years, which he knows, and I don't want him to miss out on important occasions in our marriage like my pregnancy/ the first year of our child's life. I also have a big fear of being alone. We have been together for about 5.5-6 years, and any extended period of time we have been apart, I have a rough time being alone, especially if there is nothing to occupy my time.\n\nI've had a few people agree with me, that it is a big decision and sort of an extreme one, and I have had others say that the benefits are great and it would help us to become financially stable. \n\nI just really want some opinions and things to think about! Thanks!", "summary": "Husband wants to join Air Force and wants me to decide if he can or not, but I don't want us to miss out on big experiences in our marriage together."}
{"id": "t3_351x1e", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Roommate tensions have grown violent. (US. Michigan)", "post": "The conflict between three of us in the house and our craigslist roommate resulted in a police call Monday night. \n\nOur roommate (now referred to as Craig) has been shirking every responsibility in taking care of our house. Craig himself is a weird guy, mumbles to himself, isolates himself in his room, occasionally records our female roommate with his phone, and refuses to do anything involving cleaning or house work.\n\nWe've tried to settle things peacefully and buy him out of the lease, but every time he says \"I don't think that would be the best choice for me.\" He occasionally mentions that if he moves out, we would \"fail to learn our lesson\". \n\nOn Monday night, I approached him about his failure to do any chores in the house, and after some shouting back and forth he pushed me in the chest with a detergent bottle he was holding, we tussled and both I and the female roommate told him to back off. I grabbed a knife off the counter and told him to leave us alone, threatening to hurt him if he didn't go into his room.\n\nHe called the police. After speaking with them (apparently he told them I had started everything and had attempted to swing at him with the knife) and clarifying with the help of the female roommate, they decided to diffuse the situation by escorting Craig out of the house and having him sleep somewhere else that night.\n\nI haven't received the police report yet, but I was wondering if there was anything I could do to get him out of the house? At this point we are worried he'll snap and try to hurt us. The Landlord has made it clear that she doesn't want to be involved, but I am trying to convince her that if she doesn't, we will be in danger.", "summary": "Roommate scares the snot out of the rest of us, police report filed, Landlord doesn't want to do anything. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_24sld4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my Girlfriend [22 F] 1 year, Wants to get married and move in with", "post": "I am madly in love with my girlfriend of a year and a half and I would be happy living the rest of my with her. I helped her escape a previous terrible relationship and she has helped me restore focus to my life and bring me out of a funk I found myself in.\n\nWe always talked about getting married as it was the obvious next step and I never had an issue with it. She lives with her parents and I on my own as she has conservative christian parents who frown on living together before marriage.\n\nThe situation I am having now is that her sister and her husband live in the same house with her and her parents so it's a very crowded home. Recently, her sister was diagnosed with a debilitating condition that is making her home life very stressful and it has been noticeable her normally cheery attitude. She is very tired and stressed out with this combined with her 2 jobs and college course load.\n\nShe asked me today If I would marry her and get an apartment together while we save up for a home together. I don't think this is a bad idea but I need to know what I need to do for this to work, My father is absent from my life so I never really had those growing up moments when it comes to relationships.\n\nI'm a little nervous about it mostly on financial reasons, I have about 15k in debt between my car and school but I have a good job. My Credit was ruined at a young age by my father so that's also an issue.\n\nShe supports herself with two jobs and has average credit for someone her age and not much debt to speak of.", "summary": "My girlfriend wants me to propose to her and get an apartment what do I need to do/confirm before I do it, to make sure it works."}
{"id": "t3_30z7ck", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] recieved a message from my brother [24 M] which puts me at a loss for words.", "post": "I don't know how to feel or what to say at the moment.\n\nMy brother sent a FB message including myself, our father, and our uncle. In this message he opens up and confronts our uncle for molesting him when he was younger for about a year, and even introducing him to child pornogrophy. In this lengthy message he explains how it messed with him as a child, and how it stil messes with him today. He says it is the first time he has ever told anybody about it.\n\nThe shocker is that in this message he tells our uncle that he forgives him because he doesn't want to take him away from his 4 kids.\n\nI am having a harder time finding the strength to forgive my uncle for his despicable actions, and am afraid to find out if he has done this to anyone else. \n\nI don't know what to do. Want to honor my brothers wishes of not getting our uncle in trouble, but I can't fathom him getting off scott free, I and just hope so badly he isnt doing this to anyone else, or even his kids.\n\nI'm getting chills just thinking about the next family gathering where I have to talk to, or even just look at my uncle", "summary": "Brother confesses that our uncle molested him as a child, but forgives him and doesn't want him to face any consequences."}
{"id": "t3_1caric", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[28/M] The path ahead is clouded...", "post": "Welp.  I feel pretty stupid right now and am at a bit of a loss.  Met a girl a few weeks ago through a mutual friend, she made it pretty clear that she's interested in me, we spent a couple weeks texting and FB messaging as I was working out of town.  I was all excited, arranged a date last week, it went good so went on another one last night, which also went really well.  She's nice, pretty, and intelligent, and I do enjoy spending time with her.  We laugh and have great conversation... but as soon as we part, I feel like I'm not attracted to her, and her (perceived) flaws come rushing to the forefront of my mind:  she has a negative attitude, she has poor posture, she's too short for me, she interrupts.  To make matters worse, I realised that I'm still hung up on another girl - pretty much my dream girl - who's already told me she'll only ever see me as a friend.  Stupid, right?  I thought I'd come to terms with that and moved on months ago.  Nope.  I'm mentally comparing her to the current girl.\n\nI like this girl and really want to give her a shot, but the only time I feel attraction is when we're together and I think that's due to my own insecurity and need for physical contact.  The rest of the time, responding to her feels like a nuisance, thinking about her conjures only her negative traits, and I worry that if I follow this through I'll be settling just for the sake of having a relationship.", "summary": "I *want* to like this girl, but I don't feel attracted to her, in part because I'm hung up on someone else."}
{"id": "t3_1hd8so", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "College plans for my boyfriend (m/18) and I (f/18)", "post": "We've been together for close to two years and in a few months we're going to colleges pretty far away from each other.  He's my best friend and I'm in love with him, but we both think we're going to hold the other back in college and end up with a bad break up if we try to stay together.  \nSo our plan is to part ways peacefully when it's time to leave and remain close.  We have both agreed to do our own things when we're at school and when we are home together to be with each other.  \nDoes this sound like a good plan?  We'd so much rather have to say goodbye before we're ready to split than try to stick it out and hate each other.  Is this going to work?", "summary": "My boyfriend and I are breaking up peacefully when its time to leave for college but are going to remain close and be with each other when we are both home.  Will this work?"}
{"id": "t3_2awzyr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[24 F] am anxious about my BF [36 M] of 1.5 years, because he is still good friends with his cheating ex who I have never met.", "post": "My bf(36) is still good friends with his ex who he dated for 3 years about 7 years ago. She cheated on him, so they broke up. She lives in another state so I have never met her.  They talk on the phone fairly often, I think at least monthly. \n\nWhen we moved in together 6 months ago I asked him not talk to her on the phone while I was at home with him because it made me feel bad (ignored), but that I still wanted them to be friends if that's what they wanted. \n\nRecently I discovered she was living in our city again and that my bf had seen her twice without telling me. It made me feel betrayed and I didn't understand it. \n\nMy instinct is to find out more about this girl so I can understand their past and present relationship better and feel more comfortable about it. Should I ask for more info about her or will knowing make it worse?\n\nI saw a message from her a few months ago that said xoxo and while it didn't bother me then, it now makes me wonder what kind of communication they have and what the relationship is about. Should I ask about it and the text specifically even though I didn't mention it when it happened? \n\nHow can we communicate about this without me sounding jealous?\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Bf still friends with cheating ex who I have never met. Should I ask more about what kind of relationship/communication they have or just accept the situation?"}
{"id": "t3_2zssgc", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "My mom may have screwed me out of my settlement money.", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nI'm a 22 year old and when I was about 15 I received a lawsuit settlement for roughly 100k after lawyer and insurance fees.  \n\nI've never spent any of it with plans on paying for my school then investing it for my future. But I had plans on receiving it this past December. \n\nBut my mom, who managed everything for me since I was 15 at the time, said it was sent to the wrong address and has been deposited/cashed already by someone at the wrong address. And now she says a claim is open and they're investigating it.\n\nThe reason I don't believe my mom is my aunt was scammed by an online dating scam and then lied to my mom to get more money to send to him, but my mom claims she didn't touch my settlement fund. \n\nShe said she invested it through tiaacref. Should I believe it was sent to the wrong address and then deposited by the wrong people?", "summary": "my mom was previously duped by a family member, claims she didn't touch my settlement, now my settlement is gone."}
{"id": "t3_fu53x", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Starting over again and seeking guidance", "post": "Hello!\n\nSo, here's the deal -- I've already lost quite a bit of weight.  I'm 25, female, and 5'6\".  In August of 2008, I had just quit grad school, hated my life, and was really exceptionally depressed.  I was renting a tiny bedroom in a house in the middle of nowhere, and I had no job.  [I weighed 245 pounds]  I got a job waiting tables, and my weight slowly began to drop.  Starting in November of 2009, I liked what had been happening and decided to actively try losing weight.  By September 2010, [I was down to about 190] had a great job, great friends, and was really, really stoked.\n\nHere's where things get tricky.  Around this time, I started dating a super-excellent guy.  Our social circles have meshed effortlessly, and we spend a lot of time together.  He's a really picky eater, though, and doesn't like most of the stuff that I do (which is, coincidentally, the food that's helped me lose weight), so we end up eating out a lot.  Not only has my wallet taken a solid hit, I've gained about 15 pounds since we started dating.  Not enough to really *see*, but I'm definitely more sluggish, and it bothers me a lot.  On top of all this, I've become much more busy, now that I have a \"real\" job and I have an active group of friends.\n\nWhat do I do, folks?  I really don't know where to go from here.  I honestly don't know what a good goal weight for me is, and while I can work more activity into my life pretty easily, I don't know how to deal with the \"I'm always out, what on earth do I eat?\" problem.\n\nI'm sorry if this was weirdly-phrased and rambly -- I'll clarify if y'all have questions, but I really would love some help on how to get myself together again.", "summary": "Lost ~55 pounds, have gained about 15 back, need help on getting myself back on track.  Can I do that if I'm stuck eating out a lot?"}
{"id": "t3_1x4w7o", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Facebook refuses to take down photos of me being attacked", "post": "A few years ago, 2009 so I think I am past being able to report to the police, I was out and got attacked by a bunch of guys. I am a short woman and this was a physical attack - hitting (not rape).\n\nI recently found through a very convoluted \"friend\" chain on facebook found some pictures one of the guys took of that night. I do not know the person whose picture it is, nor do I really want to contact the person as I don't want to remind them of what they did and them all to get a good laugh out of it, nor do I think I can talk to them.\n\nI have tried reporting these photos to facebook and they refuse to remove them. It is just an automated system so I can never tell my story to them, just click report. And because you have to report photos on an individual basis, some of them do not show them actually attacking me, just them near me, so if you are reviewing that photo on its own, it may not seem that bad as it is just a girl surrounded by a bunch of guys laughing at her. There is no way to report as a whole. Also the comments that go with these photos are horrible, talking about and joking about what they did.\n\nI don't know what to do. It is upsetting me and I feel so helpless. I just don't understand how facebook can allow such things and have no way to report a group of photos, because even if they took down some of them, but left the rest because they aren't showing anything \"bad\" like I said above, it is still a reminder of what happened, and something on that guys facebook where he can go back and laugh at with his mates.", "summary": "There are some photos of me being attacked on facebook and facebook refuses to take them down, and I don't know what else I can do."}
{"id": "t3_2c5ldy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] had a party at a hotel and got billed $250 additional charge for \"damage\", my friends [20F][26F][28M][27M][21M][19F] do not want to help.", "post": "So I recently wanted to throw a party at a hotel with a pool for my 19th birthday. NUMEROUS random people ended up coming without my permission. Hookah was smoked, the hotel had no damage it was just a fucking mess and we actually ended up getting kicked out.\n\nThis place would have been cake to clean up, it was just messy but the hotel was insistent on me paying an additional $250. Ok fine I'm not gonna argue with that because we created a commotion, COMPLETELY reasonable for them to do that. It was agreed by the original crew that was expected to be there that I would pay for the room ($140) and everyone else would get alcohol. \n\nOkay that being said, I did NOT expect to have an extra $250 to be added on to that tab. It was a shit show of a night and I COMPLETELY understand I'm at an incredible amount of fault HOWEVER, nobody has mentioned helping pitch a tiny bit of money to help pay for the cleaning fee. Every time I bring it up, I see sour faces and awkward change of subjects. I get that the room was under my name and the room was up to me but still...come on we all contributed to the mess.\n\nAm I really being a penny pincher here? Am I crazy? What should I do/say.", "summary": "Threw a hotel party, got charged extra and nobody is willing to help pay for damage even though we all partied in there."}
{"id": "t3_256pda", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18/M] did something kinda stupid and want to know if I should try to correct it with this girl [19/F] further or leave it be.", "post": "This is kinda non-romantic, I suppose. I recently made several new friends on twitter. All of them are girls. They're all fairly cute but I've been burned once by internet relationships and I wasn't really looking for another\n\nWell... I got drunk and told one of the girls that I thought she was really cute but that I \"didn't mean anything serious about it.\"\n\nI woke up in the morning and realized what I'd done and apologized and her exact words were \"no no, it's always nice to know somebody thinks you look nice :)\"\n\nI feel awful about it and I feel like a creep but I feel like apologizing further would just make it weirder. We haven't spoken since and I don't have many friends (even very casual ones like this one) and it just makes me feel worse that I think I accidentally fucked one up I think.\n\nI can include the exact messages exchanged if need be.", "summary": "Lonely, drunk, met new friends, accidentally drunkenly told one that I thought she was cute and feel like a creep about it. Want to know if I should pursue it further."}
{"id": "t3_27n631", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by wearing breakaway shorts.", "post": "7th grade, gym class. This year they started making us 'dress out' in shorts and t-shirts. Right around this time, I've become a fan of the freedom offered by not wearing underwear, and it is grand. \nOne day, without thinking it through, I bring breakaway shorts (i.e. with buttons on the sides) to change into for class. Naturally, flag football is that day's activity. \n\nSo we head out onto the field for our game. It is a beautiful day. The sun is shining; I distinctively remember a cool breeze. The girl's gym class walks the track around field while we play. \n\nI deliberately avoid the ball most of the game. We have about 10 minutes left to play and our QB sends me a pass. I *tried* to drop it but the pass was too perfect to play it off. So I bolt for the endzone, with (I'll call him) Nick's bitch ass chasing me. So I run it in and we all cheer, but fucking Nick is compelled to complete his defensive duty and take my flag.\n\nYou know what fucking happened. Goddamn Nick grabbed a fistful of flag and shorts, and with a seriously unnecessary flourish ripped it all away. \n\nSo everyone is laughing. Girls on the track are bumping into other girls who stopped to laugh. I'm struggling to cover up and get my shorts back at the same time, but *fucking Nick* plays keep-away. The coach eventually makes him give me my shorts, but the damage was done. My entire underworld had been illuminated. \n\nFucking Nick gets everyone to call me Commando for weeks. The story spreads and I try to say that I was wearing underwear and that he ripped those off too, but who am I fucking kidding.\n\nIt isn't so bad now, but super embarrasing at the time. As with many fuck-ups, there was a silver lining. Debra, the goth girl with inexplicable and intimidating sexual maturity, was apparently super turned on when she heard I didn't wear underwear. A couple years later we met at a party. I wore underwear by then, which disappointed her a bit, but she still rocked my world.", "summary": "De-pantsed in gym while commando. Ended up getting a story and a blowjob out of it. 8/10, would be humiliated again."}
{"id": "t3_fqoj9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I think I have hemorrhoids and I'm only 23...HELP", "post": "So I was hooking up with this girl the other night and in the morning I noticed my corn-hole felt alittle funny, but I didn't think much of it at the time. Later that day I hopped in the shower and, following a pro-tip I learned from Reddit, used my old loofah to scrub out any extra ...residue that might have gotten caught up in my butt fro. At the exact instant the loofah came in contact with my hole, I nearly passed out from the pain. It felt as if someone had sodomized me with an industrial cheese grader. My vision started to blur and I had to brace myself against the side of the shower so I wouldn't fall down. After about 5 minutes of recovering in this position, I finally regained enough courage to examine myself. I positioned a finger to where I thought my butt hole would be and discovered a shockingly large swollen abscess that was painful to touch and very tender.\n\nSo now I'm left wondering, is this a hemorrhoid or some crazy STD? How did I get it in the first place, how do I not get it in the future and how do I make it go away? Is this normal for 23 year old guys? Thanks in advance Reddit.\n\nNote: It's been three days now and my butt hole still hurts. I haven't dared to touch it again, but I don't think the abscess has gotten any smaller. Sitting down is slightly uncomfortable, but not especially painful. \n\nAdditional Note: I was pretty drunk when I hooked up with said girl, but to the best of my knowledge, she didn't touch or interfere with my poop spout.", "summary": "I think I have a hemorrhoid, how do I prevent myself from getting them again and how do I make it go away?"}
{"id": "t3_419w0e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my boyfriend [22 M] of 3 years, not sure I can handle his chronic pain", "post": "I feel like a shitty boyfriend for even thinking about it, but it feels like I get nothing out of our relationship anymore. We got together for a common hobby, one that he almost can't participate in anymore because of chronic pain issues in hands, shoulders and feet. I'm as supportive as I can be, goes with him to doctors appointments, helps with calls, deals with his anxiety when it gets out of hand, it feels like I'm more of a caretaker than partner at this point. He has been out of school and job for a year at this point because of pain.\n\nI have 5 hours of school Monday to Friday while he's out 2 hours, I'm still the one who starts cleaning when I get home. 5/7 days a week I fix dinner, I wash our clothes and do most of the dishes. When I bring it up he says it just seems like I do most of the work because I'm away more than him, but I remember what state I left the rooms in. I can absolutely tell when he hasn't done anything all day.\nI don't feel like I can ask more of him, because there's always an issue with pain, or suddenly the anxiety flares up.\n\nHe will usually tell me about his pain every day. Some days he will tell me it's especially bad, it just feels like I lack the empathy at this point, and I feel bad for not being caring enough. It's not because the pain isn't real, and he is in the middle of new medication for it, but it might very well be forever.\n\nI recently got the option to go to another country for my education. He can't go with me, if I choose to do so, and I would basically drop him on the floor because he's dependant on me, and I would feel like the world's biggest asshole. He has done so much for me, and getting chronic pain put of no where isn't his fault. I still love him, but I'm not sure I can live with him when he's like this. I feel drained and stuck at this point. Who the hell leaves someone for being unable to keep up with housework or common hobby.", "summary": "Boyfriend got chronic pain in limps a year ago, don't know whether I can handle taking care of everything."}
{"id": "t3_381vsf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by shaving in the shower when I've only gotten 2 hours of sleep.", "post": "So I woke up at 8:30 today after spending the night out and returning home at 6:30, resulting in me only getting 2 hours of sleep. After I woke up, I felt a sense of grime on my body so I decided to take an early morning shower before heading out. After I finished shampooing, brushing my teeth, and masturbating, I decided to shave as I haven't done so in awhile resulting in a thin veil of stubble. At this point the warm water and steam was making me drowsy and I vaguely recall having second thoughts on shaving.\nBut I shaved\nAfter I shaved, the next thing to do on my list was cleansing the razor, so I began to do what I felt came naturally at the time whilst running on the fumes of 2 hours of sleep. I began running my index finger up and down the razor blades in an attempt to get the hair out of it.\nI finished showering and stepped out to dry myself. And on the towel, Blood.", "summary": "Don't shave when you've only had 2 hours of sleep the previous night, and don't wash your razor by running your finger up and down the razor blade."}
{"id": "t3_rq7ir", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I deal with this without breaking down any friendships and not being a complete pushover?", "post": "Me and said girl wen't to same first school and we'd known each other for a long time. In the last few months or so we'd been hanging out more in the awkward: not sure if friends or dating way. More recently we were talking and I asked her out properly - to clarify things as she always would say that she loved me :/ - she said yes. Well, for a while. \nShe phoned me a few hours later clearly having had some distress over the whole thing and said that she didn't want to lose our friendship and that she \"loved me like a brother\" ( that one hurt.) I had been friend-zoned. \n\nMore recently we'd been okay but I haven't seen her much or really talked deeply to be honest. It was at this time that my supposed best friend - with whom I am in a band, short-film company and a school - \nstarted to talk with her and as of today asked her out. \n\nI'm feeling betrayed by me best friend and annoyed at me ex. of a few hours for the way she has / is handling it.\n\nHow do I deal with this without breaking down any friendships and not being a complete pushover?", "summary": "Girl who rejected me now going out with \"best-friend\". Can't avoid as we have to meet a lot. (Girl and Friend)"}
{"id": "t3_3a3x9u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When my [20 F] long distance boyfriend (21 M] text, he usually responds with short, one or two words answers. It feels like I'm talking to a brick wall, how do I politely talk to him about this?", "post": "An average conversation between us is very one sided. I feel like I'm the only one asking questions/responding more than a couple words. His most recent text would be something like \"I see\" or \"gotchya\" or \"nice\" or something and wonder why I wouldn't respond sometimes. The conversation is going no where and his responses give me the impression he's busy or doesn't want to talk. I want to have a real conversation with him, not an echo chamber of \"yea's\". \n\nI want to talk to him about this, but I'm not sure the best way to bring it up/get results.", "summary": "Boyfriend often does one word responses to texts which leaves us in a dead end conversation and makes me feel like he doesn't want to talk; what's the best way to talk to him about this?"}
{"id": "t3_nvaa6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I've been up for ~55 hours and worried that I won't be able to get sleep tonight. Help?", "post": "Tuesday night, I was unable to fall asleep..at all. I've had a lot of 2 hour nights, but this is the first time I didn't fall asleep at all in 10 years. I was awake from the 4 day weekend I had (being able to sleep late) and then when it was 2:00 AM and I wasn't asleep still I started getting anxious which prevented me from falling asleep.\n\nI was exhausted last night, went to bed at 9:45 PM and still couldn't fall asleep. I was so nervous about not being able to fall asleep again (as neurotic as that sounds) that it didn't happen. Once 11:00 PM hit, I took Nyquil and it did nothing (in the past it has knocked me out when i had colds).\n\nI'm approaching the end of the work day today and somehow managed to get by even though I'm very cranky and overly emotional about everything. I'm concerned about not being able to fall asleep again. I know the \"cure\" is to just relax and not worry about it and my body will do the rest, but I don't think it's that easy. I'm looking for advice on what I can do to help me fall asleep tonight. Anything would be appreciated..I'm getting desperate. No \"get drunk\" recommendations since I will only feel worse in the morning. Thanks!", "summary": "My nervousness about not being able to fall asleep has kept me up for two nights in a row and am worried about it doing the same tonight. Looking for help on how to fall asleep tonight!"}
{"id": "t3_1ifq69", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(37M) Suddenly having real trouble finding love... But it's not what you think.", "post": "Hi, RA folks,\n\nI spent my twenties in a series of long-term relationships. When the last ended painfully, I had a ton of healing to do. She had been my great love and seemed so out of my league, I'd never be able to truly replace her. I felt a huge amount of painful pressure to settle down and prove my worth to the world, and it felt like I'd lost my big chance (BS, I know).\n\nI spent my early 30s trying to date seriously, but mostly just having shortish relationships, freaking out in some way (clearly unhealed from my big breakup), and respectfully ending things. The last one of those ended about two years ago. I then took some single time to get therapy and work on that reticence to bond with people, and it's worked. I ended up moving to a new city for a fresh start. Since then, I have had a couple of very short flings, but nothing serious.\n\nMost of my loves have been friends first. I've tried internet dating but never had a good coupling come from that. Back in the day, I always seemed to be meeting someone and having magic occur. Now, it doesn't.\n\nA lot of people would say \"Your 30s are different; you're not as social, you've got all these extra responsibilities, your friends group is smaller...\" but given my lifestyle (as a creative professional in a big city with a big group of similar friends), none of those statements ring true. What's more, in my 20s, I was damaged goods\u2014dealing with a litany of undiagnosed and untreated mental issues, often out of shape, unmotivated, and overdoing the partying. \n\nThese days, I'm a changed man... I'm much happier, I'm fit, healthy, and decently attractive (in my own strange nerdy way). I run my own business which supports me fine, and I'm no longer tied to the need to settle down to prove myself. So, if I'm a better catch (beyond my being \"old\") and in an active, wacky creative social scene, where's the magic? I miss love a lot.", "summary": "I found love pretty easily in my 20s. It's much harder to find now, even though I'm a better man in a more ideal situation than I used to be. What am I doing wrong (besides being old)?"}
{"id": "t3_nncx9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit,what is your best \"be careful what you wish for\" moment?", "post": "Mine- I was really good friends with this one girl, who ended up dating one of my best friends. I guess I had always kind of liked her, but never admitted it to myself. A few months into their relationship I had to tell her, and she told me she like me too, she had just never said anything. At that time, I really wished things were different and I could be with her. A few months later, they broke up. I gave about a 6 month grace period, and thinking my friend wouldn't care, started seeing her more often. We got to the point where we were in a relationship without the title of bf/gf.  Never told my friend, my mistake. (I was planning on telling him once we actually started dating). He found out from another friend before I planned on telling him, he flipped out, was way more possessive and upset than I thought he would be, especially since they never had a super serious relationship. So I got the girl, but lost my friend.", "summary": "Liked my one of best friend's ex(also a good friend of mine), got with her, lost my friend."}
{"id": "t3_b3ud8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Ok Reddit, I'm essentially getting scammed here and need your help please!", "post": "A little background: So back in 2008 I went to WeFest and signed up for one of those \"Win a free vacation!\" things. Anyway a couple days later I get a call saying I won. (Here comes the stupid part) One thing leads to another I give my credit card info. Please don't just say I shouldn't have done that etc., I know I shouldn't have, lesson learned/ in progess. I agreed to $175 +$43/month over 6 months. About an hour later I realized, holy hell I'm dumb called and cancelled the 6 months but they still got me for the $175. Now, 18 months later I get a call saying I have a substantial balance of $898 due, asked what would happen if I refused to pay it and they said they would just debit the credit card they have on file. Can they do this? I never actually signed anything and know I never agreed to that much. Are they just trying to get me to agree for more money now?", "summary": "Gave credit card over the phone. Now company calls me again 18 months later saying I still owe $898 or they will just charge me anyway with the account they still have on record."}
{"id": "t3_3hhohx", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Barking at Strangers at Night", "post": "Hi all, I'll try and make this quick! \n\nSo my dog is laid up with a ligament tear, and has been for about 10 weeks.  She's obviously sick of being cooped up, but for the most part has been entirely chill about the whole process, but I was expecting a bit of a backslide in her training. \n\nRecently (last two weeks) she's been barking at people she doesn't recognize when I'm walking her to the bathroom at night.  To be fair, this is a relatively new apartment/ area for her, and she's been laid up and hasn't been able to explore/ meet the neighbors.\n\n  It usually goes down like so: Milly sees a person in the distance and goes on alert (ears up, tail up, eyes focused). I usually at this point try to distract her with a, \"Hey, Milly, it's just our neighbor.  thanks for letting me know they are there!\" If they keep walking toward us, or we keep walking toward them, she usually breaks into the crazy greeting dance of her people (total wiggle butt, hoping side to side, ears up but relaxed).  We're working on a more relaxed greeting.  At this point I usually make her sit and stay by my side until she calms down.  \nWell, if they don't move toward us (fair enough when she's clearly on alert), or she isn't allowed to get closer/ investigate she will bark.  Not a low bark, but a higher \"hey, you! Friend?\" kind of bark.  At this point I say, \"enough\" sternly and work with her until she will heel beside me and then we sit calmly once she's away from the stimulus. Once she completely calms down and has listened she gets a \"thank you\" and a treat.  I have a feeling this will go away once she has a chance to run/ play/ explore/ say hi to the neighbors and get some energy out, but maybe not, and I would like to curb the habit of barking at people, especially because she is rather large (in comparison to most dogs in the building) and sometimes she barks at people that already seem afraid of her.", "summary": "Dog barks at strangers usually just at night. Am I doing this right? Should I be more focused on removing her from the situation or getting her to focus on me?"}
{"id": "t3_1sef8s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (24 F) best friend of ten years (23 F) seems to have completely chosen her boyfriend and friends over me. Unsure of what to do about Christmas gifts.", "post": "My best friend and I have been friends since freshman year of high school. Ever since then, we've been inseparable. We never hadfights or really disagreed on everything. She was really one of my only friends since I was going through deep depression and no one wanted to be around me so I cherish her deeply. However, for around six months, she got a new boyfriend and a new group friends from her work. And I'm really happy for her especially because I went college and she stayed around home and didn't really hang out with anyone else. \n\nHowever, I noticed that she is getting especially distant around me, even when she is with me. When I attempt to ask her to hang out, she'll ignore my texts or say that she is hanging with her new friends or boyfriend. \n\nOnce we had plans and she said she was too sick to hang out but then she has the nerve to come into my work while I'm working with her boyfriend not looking sick at all. If that didn't make me mad enough, for my birthday shortly after, we usually exchange really awesome and thoughtful gifts since our birthdays are around the same time. I got her concert tickets to my favorite band and she got me 20 dollars and a card. I felt extremely embarrassed and sad that she seemed to not put any thought at all. And then shortly after, I was present when she spent over 300 dollars on her boyfriend and new friends when we hung out one day. \n\nSo now that brings up Christmas. After that embarrassing birthday encounter, I don't feel  I should get her anything extravagant because despite her ignoring me, she still reminds me about our Xmas tradition which makes me think she might be using me.  I'm paranoid at this point, mind me. \n\nAnyway, I don't know what to do at this point about making plans. I'm really sick of getting ignored and lied to.", "summary": "friend has a new boyfriend. Ignores my attempts to hang out but still reminds me of our Xmas gift giving tradition."}
{"id": "t3_15x04r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (26f) screw things up every time I'm nice... how can I not with him(27)?", "post": "The past couple of years have revealed a pattern I'm finding a little concerning - I date a guy for a while and hold myself back from gestures or being too forward, then I get a little relaxed (which can be anything from a few weeks to a few months) and within days of me being nicer (texting him first, planning a date, settling for going round to his apartment if he's feeling tired, etc.) then suddenly he loses interest. I once baked cookies on Valentine's Day when we'd been together a few months and the guy freaked out. \n\nSo now I have been dating a guy for a month and he's lovely, but I'm just waiting for it to end - and I feel as soon as I relax or, heaven forbid give him a compliment or say I like him, he's going to bolt.\n\nThe big problem is that he's picking me up from the airport after the Christmas break, and I can't be so ungrateful as to just say thank you, but I'm afraid if I do anything nice he'll run. \n\nSo how can I be affectionate and kind to a guy without him losing interest?", "summary": "I think my allure is in being a bit challenging - I'm opinionated and have a backbone. As soon as I mellow, guys run. What gives and how can I overcome this?"}
{"id": "t3_s3s6e", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hiring mangers of reddit, is calling more people to interview after conducting some interviews a necessary sign you aren't happy with those you've already interviewed?", "post": "Sorry this will be long.\n\nI am about to graduate from law school and applied for a job where they are seeking someone with a J.D. to work as a contract manager.  I sent my resume and cover letter and was called within 1-2 hours after emailing it to come in and interview.\n\nAs it turns out, the job posting (I am pretty sure at least) only went out to my classmates.  I know several people who have applied.\n\nThe interview was yesterday and I feel very positive about it.  I tend to interview well, and all the signs from the three different people I interviewed with really made me think I have a good shot at this job.  My interview concluded at 2:45pm or so.\n\nI was told by HR that they have \"a couple more interviews this week\" and \"one pushed back to next wee\" but she will contact me either way with an offer or just to let me know they are going a different direction \"soon\" and that the contact should happen \"pretty quickly\" likely within 1 week, and probably not more than 2.\n\nI found out today that a classmate/friend of mine who applied the same day as me (a week ago yesterday) was called yesterday to come in for an interview this week.\n\nI know for sure they conducted at least two interviews yesterday before the call to my friend to ask him to interview.  He and I applied the same day, and I was called within 2 hours of applying the same day, but he was called a full week later to interview.  And he was called at 3:45pm so definitely after my interview had concluded.\n\nMy question is, does calling more people to interview mean that they probably didn't love me and are trying to get a bigger interview pool?\n\nI don't know what to make of it, and I am stressing royally because not only is it my dream job, but the pay is simply amazing.  However, the pay was not advertised in the job posting and I only found out from the HR Manager at the end of my interview what the salary is.\n\nThoughts?", "summary": "Thought I rocked an interview for a job that is hiring quickly from a limited pool only to find out they called at least one other person to interview after my interview had concluded."}
{"id": "t3_17hgpd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [21] are seemingly at wits end with me [21].    [9 months]", "post": "Please don't mind the username, it was a throwaway for reasons obvious.\n\nI am 21, and I am largely an introvert. I am often thinking and I am truely caring for this girl I have dated for just about nine months. The problem is, I would anything for her, but all the little hints she drops, I am seemingly stupid and somehow let it fly past me. She lives by the absolute actions speak louder then words adage, but yet I just cannot manage to pick up the hints and move them to fruition. \n\nThis probably sounds repetitive, but after an hour conversation to how I have wronged her, I don't know what else I can say. I swear she deserves better, and I swear that I hold nothing but the highest regard for her and I would be devastated if I lose her, but just my mentality and my actions are very brief, calculated and very unemotional. I am also far from spontaneous. Hell, I cannot even choose dinner because I only care to get her what she wants. She always wishes I would take her out on a date or dinner, but it just never crosses my mind, not because of how much I care, but just because I am not any type of person who can actively make plans...\n\n Anyone else in this situation can give me a hand before I lose one of the best things I have had due to my stubborn and seemingly callous nature?", "summary": "I love my girlfriend, but I am a very reserved and non emotional type person. That seems to be what she wants, what can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_27vt70", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] thinks I should divorce my wife [32 F] of 2 years. We're gonna have to do long distance for work and I don't think I can be faithful.", "post": "I have never cheated on her but I think I may make a big mistake when I leave.  We have other issues too.  She really wants kids and talks about it daily.  I can't see myself having kids with her because I don't think she would be a good mom.  She is a really good person but I'm not in love with her.  \n\nI also have the fear that I'm being too picky and no one out there is going to be perfect.  My wife is pretty great all around but I'm just not in love with her.  I'm not physically attracted to her anymore.   I know she would be happy if we stayed together, I would be much better off financially if I didn't have to go through a divorce.  Is there some way to trick my brain into thinking I'm in love with her for eternity?", "summary": "I feel like a scumbag person with integrity. I want to divorce my wife because I don't think I can stay faithful to her.   How do I approach this subject with her?  "}
{"id": "t3_133zap", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure how to handle family death and broken relationship with my girlfriends father.", "post": "Hey /r/relationships! I'm new here but desperately need your help, so we'll start with the first thing.\n\nWell, my girlfriend (Alana) and I (Ryan) are both 21 years old, and we've been dating for 2 years and 3 months!\n\nAnyway, this past Sunday, she's experienced her first family death, being her Uncle who has passed away from Lung Cancer.  Now I've had relatives pass away before but the latest one was 5 years ago, and I wasn't that close with them.  However, her family is *super* close, so it's impacting everyone so much.\n\nNow, I have never helped a partner get through the death of a relative, so I'm not sure how I should act/behave or what I should say...Do I treat this like anyone else?\n\nSecondly, there is the matter with her father.  Her mom and dad have been divorced all her life, and she grew up with her mom seeing her dad occasionally.  They weren't exactly close until about 4 years ago, but now they are severing their relationship and I have **NO** idea how to deal with this.\n\nI've never dealt with something like this...I have no idea where to start or what to say.  Her dad and I got along quite well but I'm obviously going to support her with every decision she makes, unless it's absolutely ludicrous.\n\nSo there you have it, and any help is greatly appreciated! If I've submitted this to the wrong subreddit I do apologise and you can kindly point me in the correct direction.", "summary": "I don't know how to guide my girlfriend through her first family death as well as her severing her relationship with her Dad."}
{"id": "t3_oux00", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Worried my girl might be too spoiled?", "post": "If you've read my other questions, you know some facts about the relationship, but here's all the background context:\n\nHer last exes spent a lot of money on her.  They took her out on dinner dates very often, took her shopping, paid for her clothes and her gas, bought her necessities and luxury items, and even paid to have her car repaired (300-400 dollars).\n\nI, however, am not as loose with my money.  I like the idea of equal and fair effort/spending for both parties.\n\nShe is a nearly broke college student and I am a not at all broke graduate.  \n\nI have told her that if she needed help paying for gas to get to my place and back, then I can help her out.  This arrangement was fine.  She only asked every month or two.  Now she seems to be asking every time she drives down.  This last time, I gave her the money and not 20 minutes later went out and bought herself 10 dollars worth of non-essential stuff.\n\nWe argued over it and she said my money was not used for it and I said I enabled her to buy that item because I would not have given her the total gas money, just the amount she needed in addition to her own spending money for gas.  She expected I'd pay her gas to allow her spending money, not give her gas because she has no spending money.\n\nIn our argument over this, she brought up her ex claiming that HE would have bought her the luxury item AND paid for her gas.  She also claimed that she has never been treated so badly by a boyfriend, and one of her boyfriends was physically abusive.\n\nMy question is this:  Is she too spoiled rotten to save, is it salvageable, or am I way off base and should be more giving with my own money?", "summary": "Poor girlfriend expects me to pay her gas to come see me, enabling her to spend her own money on other things.  Is she spoiled?"}
{"id": "t3_2nirmz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22M] lied to [20F] about where I was from. How to tell her truth on first date and not make a big deal out of it?", "post": "For some stupid reason I told this girl I met that I was form a different country (you see I come from a country that doesn't have the best cred in america and I was abit ashamed). When I met her I didnt think it was going to lead to anywhere so I wasn't that bothered about the white lie.\n\nHowever to my surprise I asked her out on a first date and she said yes. we are going out for the first time but I want to tell her the truth.\n\n How can I tell her without making myself look untrusting? I really am not that kind of perosn hence why I'm being upfront about it in first date before we start. \n\nShould I just say that I was just teasing her when I first met or it was just a joke? How can I not make it a big deal?", "summary": "Met girl, told lie about where I was form, going on first date, want to tell her truth, afraid she will think I'm untrusting - how to tell her truth without making big deal out of it?"}
{"id": "t3_1ged9j", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Cat got suddenly violent and attacks", "post": "Hi, long time owner of cats, parents got cats and I am really used to them, I own now a castrated male 4 year old persian. My daugther is almost one year old and she usually tries to catch him removing some of his hair and sometimes the cat answers and has made her some tiny scratches, nothing that would worry me up since the cat is always inside the house and I don't fear it would give her some kind of illness.\n\nThe problem came today, my daughter was softly caressing him (sometimes she does) and the cat started hissing at her, I came just quick and took the cat apart, that was this morning and not (afternoon here in Spain) the cat hasn\u00b4t stopped hissing at any of us, my wife and my daughter just got to have lunch with some friends and I'm staying with the cat.\n\nIf I stay still seated on one place the cat will calm down and relax where he can watches me, as soon as I walk he runs by me starts hissing at me, even scratched me on the ankle and won't stay too far away from me.\n\nNow I have him locked in a room with its food, water and sand and he keeps meowing. Called the vet and he told me to keep the cat locked and checked from time to time until monday when he'll make a full check on the cat to see what's wrong.\n\nI guess he is in pain, that's why he's violent and obviously he tried first with my daughter since she is the weakest, now that she is gone he has only me to attack.\n\nAny advice?", "summary": "Cat got suddenly violent and attacks me and my family, vet told to keep it apart until monday when he will go and check him. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_1391o5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "When I was 22, I picked up a 15 year old girl on the side of the road and took her to a hotel. What's your best TL;DR that's misunderstood, yet accurate?", "post": "I was 22 and driving home at roughly midnight, maybe a bit later. As I pulled into my neighborhood, which was your average middle class neighborhood, I saw a teenage girl sitting on the curb with her head in her hands, obviously crying.\n\nI circled back around, turned my dome light on so she could at least see me, and stopped next to her to ask if she needed anything. Sobbing, she asked to borrow my cell phone, which I handed to her. \n\nBefore she could use it, I asked her if she needed a ride anywhere. She gleamed and immediately jumped in my car.\n\nTurns out she had been over at the house of a guy down the street. Apparently he tried to force himself on her, and when she kept refusing he got angry and kicked her out of the house. She had ridden there with him, so had no car, and no cell phone.\n\nI asked her where she needed to go and she told me her mom worked at a hotel across town, so I took her there and dropped her off.", "summary": "When I was 22, I picked up a 15 year old girl on the side of the road and took her to a hotel."}
{"id": "t3_3k2x0c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my coworkers [various], Boss's father died, I don't want to go to the funeral or chip in for a condolence gift.", "post": "So my boss's father died. I work the overnight shift and only see my boss once a year when he does yearly reviews. I have no personal connection with him, and I don't consider him a \"friend\". \n\nI was asked if I was going to the funeral and after I said no, I was demonized, \"Why not? Wouldn't you go to a friends funeral?\" \nAnd I replied that he wasn't my friend, I didn't know his father, and it would be disrespectful of me to go when I had no real connection to the deceased. Not to mention that I worked this weekend and had to sleep during the time of the funeral. \n\nThen I was asked to chip in for his condolence gift, which is usually a gift card to some local place when it's from my team. I don't feel like someone who makes a lot more than me would benefit from my contribution as much as I need it. I'm living check to check (and /r/borrow) and starting a second job soon. \n\nNow I'm getting shit for not going and not throwing in $20 or going to the funeral. \n\nAm I in the wrong?", "summary": "Boss's father died, I didn't know him and I barely know my boss. Didn't go to the funeral and don't want to chip in for a condolence gift."}
{"id": "t3_1di39a", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Update: Just broke up with my wife of 9 years..", "post": "Here's the original post: \n\nSo, today was the day my wife actually moved out and is moving across the country. Over the last week and a half or so, I'd been dealing with a ton of emotions but I confided a great deal into a good friend of mine who helped me.\n\nToday, I'm in a better place than I was 10 days ago. Heck, even better than I was just 4 days ago. Honestly, I was nearly at a point where I was going to try and convince my wife to actually stay instead, but my friend helped me right that train of thought and I think it was for the best.\n\nSo now, I'm about to get used to being alone for the first time ever. Not a big deal so far, just got a lot of cleaning up to do around the place and sorting of some of the things she left behind. \n\nI will say that our separation went smoother than I expected and we left on good terms, so I think. Our separation agreement was fair and left both of us content with the situation, so I'm grateful for that. \n\nToday, when she left, there were some tears. Not from me, though, but that isn't to say that I'm not sad. I cried already, but I'm starting to work my way back up from that low point. I also found a note while cleaning up that just said \"I love you\" on it, obviously written and stuck in a place that wasn't TOO obvious for me to find it. I do still love her, and I'm sure I will for a long time. Maybe, down the line, we can work out things and make the kind of changes it would take to get back together, but that isn't something I want to bother myself with right now. \n\nAll in all, I'm in a content place and I'm excited for what the future holds. I've got some big plans on things I want to do for me that I haven't had the chance to do in the last 9 years, so I'm looking forward to diving headlong into that.\n\nThanks to everyone who left a comment on the first post and for all the well wishes. Things are looking up now, and hopefully they stay that way.", "summary": "Wife officially left today, had a good split, still sad but feeling better thanks to a good friend's help. Having pizza for dinner, so there."}
{"id": "t3_vwj0o", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I do not want my fiance to invite her \"best friend\" of seventeen years to our wedding. Am I wrong Reddit? (More info inside)", "post": "I was not invited to my fiance's best friend's wedding after dating my girlfriend (at the time we were not engaged) for ten years. I have met her best friend multiple times and always got along, never fought or disagreed on anything. Her friend lives in another state and when she got engaged I assumed my fiance and I would both be invited. Not only was I not invited but her friend also expected my fiance to be the maid of honor and take on all the responsibility of such an important job, all without acknowledging her relationship with me. My fiance protested and let her friend know this was wrong. After the fact her friend invited me, but I felt like damage was already done. I did not end up going. We are now planning our wedding and I refuse to add her to the invite list. Am I wrong for not inviting someone that clearly didn't want me at their wedding?\n\n**bold", "summary": "I was not invited to my fiance's best friend's wedding after dating my fiance for ten years. Should we invite her best friend to our wedding?"}
{"id": "t3_3dsp5z", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by sitting on my boyfriend's lap", "post": "Obligatory \"happened two years ago\" forward.\n\nI had the bright idea to sit on my then-boyfriend's lap while he was sitting in a poorly constructed chair. I leaned backward to pick something up from the floor, and as he shifted so I could reach it, the seat of the chair fell out from under us. I fell off his lap, landing on my back. I tried to grab onto him, so my spine was bent right where I landed. It knocked the air out of me, and I was in so much pain that I thought about going to the hospital. Weeks later it still ached, and I had to go to the chiropractor and explain how I soberly fell out of a chair. My chiropractor couldn't even do the adjustment without applying electrodes and heat to my back because the muscles were so jammed up. Now my spine dips in where I landed (or maybe I just have scoliosis, idk) and can crack just by moving my shoulder blades back. It still aches a fair amount for a few weeks at a time every so often.", "summary": "sat on boyfriend's lap in a shitty chair; both of us fell when it broke, and my back is still messed up two years later."}
{"id": "t3_3mqsp1", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [26M] met her [27F] in a hostel a little more than a week ago. I'm completely smitten, but finding her difficult to read. [xpost from /r/relationships]", "post": "I met a woman whilst on vacation in Europe, and I'm crazy about her. We met at the hostel that I was staying at. I was the one to introduce myself and we hit it off almost immediately. We went out for dinner and drinks that night and the conversation just flowed beautifully. We share so many interests and I felt an enormous amount of chemistry with her. I paid for dinner and drinks that night, for which she was very grateful. She later insisted on taking me out for dinner and drinks so that she could reciprocate.\n  \nWe both went our separate ways for a while, but she returned to the hostel after about a week. She bought me dinner and drinks and we continued to go bar hopping until early in the morning. Again, the conversation just flowed and the chemistry was unreal. I had an early flight to catch, so we said goodbye in the hostel and gave each other a big hug. That was the extent of physical contact for the evening. I'd have loved to have held her hand or even kissed her, but I was having difficulty reading her and did not want to come across too aggressively. Every time we'd make eye contact during the night, she'd throw me a somewhat awkward, but very cute smile.\n  \nWe've been in conversation ever since we got home. We're trying to make plans to see each other (we live a few states away from each other). There's even been talk about going to Europe together next summer.", "summary": "I met a woman in a hostel and I'm head over heels for her. I'm not sure how to read her behavior, so I'd appreciate some help!"}
{"id": "t3_3dgsj8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24F] boyfriend's [33M] behavior in one of his past relationships bothers me. Am I wrong?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for six years now. \n\n He's told me about his past relationships and it never really bothered me. I met the woman he dated before he met me really early in our relationship, and the truth is that she's smart and funny and I get why he dated her. I know that he had a life before me, and that part doesn't really bother me. \n\nBut we were in his hometown last week and we ran into this other girl that he \"dated.\" She's one of those girls who is trying too hard and comes off kind of desperate/sad/pathetic. She kind of made a play for him, which he obviously rejected. But when I asked him about it later, he said that she had a crush on him when they were in high school/college, and that she used to give him the occasional blowjob and whatnot when he was home from college. He said he slept with her once as well.\n\nThe actual fact that she slept with him doesn't bother me as much as the fact that he slept with her despite knowing he didn't really feel romantically toward her. He was kind of surprised by my reaction.\n\nI flat out told him it was kind of a douche move and he was like she knew it wasn't serious and I was young/stupid and that was before I met you and you are the center of my universe and blah blah blah. \n\nAnd he says she knows it wasn't serious. He's not the kind of person who would pull a bait-and-switch, but the way he described it made me feel like he had sent the \"this is not serious\" message loud and clear but that in the back of his mind he knew it hadn't been received. In his defense, this was 10-15 years ago.\n\nI'm not angry at him or anything, but I'm wondering if I'm right to feel like that was kind of shitty on his part or whether I'm totally misguided.", "summary": "Boyfriend let a girl who had a crush on him give him BJs despite not having any feelings for her. Am I wrong to think it's a bit douchey?"}
{"id": "t3_27lo8r", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Vet says our 3 month old puppy shouldn't be allowed out until he gets the rest of his vaccinations - which he can't get for 3 weeks", "post": "We've owned our puppy for 3 weeks and had finally trained him to go to the door when he needed to go out, but when we took him to the vet today to get some of his vaccinations, they told us he shouldn't go outside, because the Bordetella virus is going around. \n\nHe's only 3.5 months old, and we have to wait 3 weeks before we can give him a vaccine for Bordetella.\n\nSince we can't take him out for walks anymore, he's been peeing all over the house all day, and without being able to go outside, he's been misbehaving a very large amount since he can't expend any of his energy.  We've tried to set up a small area on our patio for him to pee on, but he's not getting the point.\n\nIs this something we should actively be worried about?  We're thinking about continuing to take him on walks, even though the vet advised against it, considering we're in an area without many stray dogs, and the dogs that are around, have owners who live near us, and therefore must be vaccinated.", "summary": "We just trained our dog scratch at the door to take him out, but now the vet says he has to stay inside for 3 weeks - not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_3tffsb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28M] Strongly suspect a woman [F20s] I barely know is an abusive relationship", "post": "A couple months ago I exchanged numbers with a woman who works in my building. We tried to set up a date but couldn't work out a time that worked for both of us, so other than grabbing breakfast together once and seeing each other in the lobby/elevator often we haven't spent any time together. \n\nWe had still been texting until a month ago. I had asked if she wanted to grab breakfast again and she texted back saying \"my boyfriend doesn't want me to talk to you anymore,\" which is fair, I didn't know she was in a relationship and my intention wasn't to be just friends, so I just said ok and left it at that. \n\nI don't want this to be too long so here are the things I've seen that worry me:\n\n1. Boyfriend waits for her at elevators at lunch time every day, heard him go off on her for being late once\n\n2. We've only been in the same elevator twice before today since all of this but both times she had obviously just been crying\n\n3. She used to take breaks to hang out with coworkers and friends, never see her with them anymore\n\n4. Most importantly, when I saw her this morning, she had what looked like a bruise from being choked around her neck. \n\nI realize that this probably doesn't seem like much, and the bruise could be explained by kinky sex some people have, but together it raises some red flags. I know someone who was in an abusive relationship before and this seems really similar to what she went through. \n\nPart of me thinks I should say something to her, but I'm not sure it's my place to and I feel I should respect her no contact request. I don't know her very well. Also if I'm wrong I'll come off as a huge jackass. But I also worry that if she doesn't have any friends anymore, she has no one to talk to about it.", "summary": "I suspect a girl I barely know might be in an abusive relationship. Not sure if I should say something to her, she doesn't seem to have friends anymore."}
{"id": "t3_3txm0k", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "What do I [f39] do about my abusive sister in law [f60] over Christmas?", "post": "The sister of my partner is an abusive bully towards her mother an my partner.  At *every* (and I mean every) family gathering that I've attended over the past 13 years (roughly 2 a year, so 26 in total), she has arrived in a foul mood, verbally and publically harassed and humiliated her mother, and done the same to my partner.  After every encounter, my partner shrugs and says, \"I know, she's awful, but she's always been like this and we can't change her now\".\n\nChristmas is usually fraught, and this year, she's insisted on hosting it at her place.  In the past, I've declined going because I'd rather avoid feeling livid post-celebration. But this year, my partner tells me that if I miss the day, his mother will be heartbroken (she's 80) and I'm pretty sure he'll be upset as well. \n\nWhat have you done in the past to help the situation?", "summary": "My sister-in-law is verbally abusive towards her mother and it drives me nuts.  I can't stand watching it happen over xmas. What have you done in a similar situation?"}
{"id": "t3_qgeap", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, urgently need your help.", "post": "Okay so my friend got her phone stolen, Iphone 4s, to be specific. that shit is obviously expensive as fuck so you can imagine her anger right now. We've got an idea as to who it is who stole it. You know, those gangster-wannabes-who-nobody-in-the-school-has-respect-for type? Yeah so, this isn't the first time they've stolen a phone, and they plan on selling it, like the other phones they've stolen. \nSo these guys are two years older than us, but we've got a friend -let's name her Laura- whose boyfriend is in that group. She keeps feeding my friend all this bullshit that her boyfriend fed her about supposedly not ever having it. Also stuff about how they \"picked it up but then put it back down because it was too heaty\"\n But as another of my friends passed by -let's call this one Caroline- they told her to tell Laura that they don't have it anymore. \nShe left her phone on the bench in the gym for *less*  5 minutes before realizing that she didn't have it, and when coming back, it wasn't there. There's no way that they picked it up, put it back down and some other people came and stole it in those few minutes. There were plenty of people in her P.E. class scattered in that whole area and there must have been *someone* who saw them take it.\nSo I really shortened the story because I've forgotten a lot of the details, but that's the main idea. She keeps trying to call it but it always seems to be turned off so she can't use that tracking app either. \nIt's also possible that they've already sold it, but we're hoping they haven't. \nShe's gone to the vice-principle but he says he can't do anything unless she has evidence, but clearly she can't prove much.  \nSo I'm asking you how to handle this situation?", "summary": "friend got phone stolen, we've got an idea of who has it but don't know how to get it back. "}
{"id": "t3_y135b", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have a final for my summer class tomorrow and I thought I'd ask everyone:  What are/were you're pre- college final routines?", "post": "Some story.  My freshman year of college first semester I took this extremely difficult linear algebra class.  I was between an F-D all semester but arrogant me would just say after every bad test \"Ah I'll figure it out, I don't need to drop.\"  Well it came to the night before the final (a Friday and my first college final) and I still didn't fucking get it.  So I said fuck it and went out and got shit faced with my friends.  I woke up the next morning hung over as all hell and went to take my test.  Low and behold I aced the fucking thing and got a B+ in a class I thought I might fail. I now go drinking the night before every final.  And it keeps working.", "summary": "Was bombing freshman math class.  Got messed up night before final.  Aced it.  Now I do it the night before every final."}
{"id": "t3_hkbuc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Are parents afraid to punish their children these days?  Where did this fear come from?", "post": "Let me begin with a short anecdote: This evening, at my place of work, I was taking orders at the cash register when a woman approached with two small children.  The one child seemed discontented and kept shrieking his order at me after his mother originally said it, then he noticed the bakery items that we sell and began screaming about those.  She made no effort to silence him.  As he yelled about wanting \"treats,\" he started to punch his mother in the breast.  Yes.  He fucking punched her in the boob, multiple times, and she didn't react.  At all.  It was like she barely registered the pain.  It was like she was so used to giving in to her child's requests that she had no nerve endings.  Oh yeah, and she bought him a brownie and a cinnamon roll.  After he punched her.\n\nSeriously.  Why don't parents these days punish their kids, or at least teach them common courtesy and respect?  When I was young, my parents would have told me to stop acting up, and that would be that.", "summary": "A woman let her kid punch her in the boob and then bought him sweets.  Are parents really that afraid to deny or punish children?"}
{"id": "t3_41rrda", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M/F] with my friend [20 F] 5 years. We used to text everyday and suddenly she stopped texting me back.", "post": "A little background: I am not very social and she is.  Never dated each other and did not want to.  We were almost immediately great friends.  I have always been nice to her and supported her in the things she has done.  \n\nMy friend, let's call her Blake, and I used to text everyday from the beginning of freshmen year of high school until our first semester in college.  When I say everyday I honestly mean everyday.  We would talk about a large range of topics (class to very personal stuff).  Then, on some random day, she stopped replying to me and has never contacted me again.  I have wished her happy holidays, birthday, etc and nothing.  Really I just want opinions on why this may be.  I guess I just miss having that really close friend that I could talk to about anything.", "summary": "My closest and best friend initiated radio silence and has cut all contact with me and I just want to why or what I can do to get over it."}
{"id": "t3_1dcix8", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Sublet and deposit issues. Boston.", "post": "Hello /r/legaladvice!\n\nI posted before asking about my landlord.\n \n\nSituation's done and I've moved out, however, now, the person I'm subletting from is refusing to give me back my deposit until he gets his deposit back.  I don't know about his situation and his deposit, but I gave him a few notices saying that I've returned my keys, and it's been 30 days, and I expect a check.  His response is that since he has not received his check, he will not give me my deposit until he receives his.\n\nWhat are my options here?  Do I wait?  What's also troubling is that he is from out of the country, and he is going back home (the middle east, I think) for the summer, so this part slightly worries me.", "summary": "rented a sublet illegally without knowing, moved out after the landlord told me to leave, returned my keys, and original renter is not returning my deposit as he supposedly didn't get his deposit."}
{"id": "t3_3oj6fg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25F] boyfriend [26M] of a few months has suspcious cuts on his legs", "post": "Hi r/relationships,\n\nI recently started dating a GREAT guy. He is thoughtful, interesting, intelligent, and has the biggest heart of anyone that I know. I am so happy and lucky to say that I genuinely mean that. I do not consider this a flaw per se but It's very clear to me that he has pretty severe anxiety. He can get very tense and stressed at times and I feel like there is often no way that I can help. I lay with him and rub his back while he vents but I'm not sure if there's more that I should be doing. \n\nA few nights ago I noticed some cuts on his upper thighs. They weren't exactly fresh wounds but they definitely weren't old enough to have been there since before we started dating. I didn't say anything (because I didn't want to kill the moment or make him uncomfortable) but I'm not sure if it's my place to say anything. Should I wait until he comes to me? Or should I speak up? He is open with me about his anxiety, so it wouldn't be completely out of left field to talk about this with him. I care about him so unbelievably much and I don't want to make him any more stressed or uncomfortable than he already is. I'm not sure how to handle this.", "summary": "I noticed cuts on my boyfriends legs. They are clean lines and do not at all look like an accident. Not sure how to address it."}
{"id": "t3_3clvmw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 F] with my Dad [43 M], he bought a gun but I feel like he is not being safe with it.", "post": "There were a few break-ins into cars and stuff in our neighborhood. My Dad decided that he wanted to buy a gun to protect the family in case of emergency. So he went out and bought a handgun. As far as I can tell, it's registered and legal. But the gun is making me very nervous and from what I looked up he isn't treating it like he should.\n\n1. He doesn't know how to shoot and doesn't want to learn \u2013 he says in case of emergency that his aim will be automatic and \"the adrenaline will get him through it\".\n2. He keeps it fully loaded all the time. I am the oldest in our house, my brother is 12 and my sister is 14, I'm worried they could just pick it up and accidentally shoot. \n3. He doesn't have a case for it and keeps it wherever he wants. He likes to keep in clean and loaded in case of emergency or whatever and leaves it lying on his nightstand, coffee tables, etc. \n\nAm I wrong to feel like this is unsafe? I tried to talk to him about it and he twisted it into me being an anti gun person and accused me of being brainwashed by Obama. He doesn't want to shoulder the extra expense of buying a case or a safe for it either, and he is very absentminded about where he leaves stuff anyway. I just want him to take proper safety precautions. Our Mom isn't in the picture so I have to figure this out. What do I do? How do I make him understand my feelings? Am I being overdramatic?", "summary": "My Dad bought a gun. I feel like he's not being safe about it and I'm worried about an accident. What should I do about it?"}
{"id": "t3_54fotg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28M] with my Wife's[28F] friend[27F] cheating on her husband[30M]", "post": "I have to use a throwaway for this. My wife's(Angela) good friend(Stacey) is cheating on her husband(Adam) with mutual friend.\n\nStacey calls my wife up and to tell her about a threesome she engaged in with another married couple. She asked not to tell anyone, including me. Adam and Stacey are close friends with another married couple, Amanda and Brad. Well Amanda and Brad asked Stacey if she would be willing to have a threesome with them. She agreed and when through with it without Adam knowing.\n\nNow Stacey is having an affair with Brad without Amanda and Adam knowing. It's been going on for some time now and I really want to let Adam know but can't because Angela is supposedly the only person that knows about this.", "summary": "Wife's friend cheating on her husband and I want to let him know but don't know how to tell him covertly."}
{"id": "t3_2r6ytu", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by tripping a blind kid, and then accidentally kicking him in the face", "post": "This happened a few years ago ago. I'm 19 now, I was 17 then and I was at a charity walk for the blind, because my mom's boyfriend's mother has macular degeneration.\n\nAnyway, I was walking, and I was playing with a white cane because I'm a juvenile. i was swinging it around recklessly while walking through a sort-of-dense crowd, when I felt it hit something and I felt a thud (we were walking on the docks of a beach, so I could feel it) a poor kid, could not have been more than 7 or 8 years old, was on the ground and had broken his glasses. I felt bad, and I quickly ran over, but I slipped on the wet dock and I could not stop myself from sliding into him, with my shoes meeting his face. His mother, whose hand he was holding, was yelling at me and I deserved it.", "summary": "Played with a cane because I wanted to be cool. Was called \"worse than Hitler\" by a woman wearing a Star of David necklace."}
{"id": "t3_22o91s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[22F] with [25M] of 2 weeks. It's just been intense intimate love making. How do I get to know him now?", "post": "I've started sleeping with this amazing guy and our sexual chemistry is out of this world, mind blowing good. For reasons unbeknownst to me we are incredibly comfortable and intimate and loving in the bedroom. We both recognise that it's like we've skipped 6 months ahead sexually though we've only been seeing each other 2 weeks. \n\nIm concerned about the massive imbalance now that we've agreed to date and be exclusive. We know each other so intimately in one way, but out of the bedroom we are essentially still acquaintances. The chemistry doesn't really match up so I feel a little awkward working backwards and getting to know him on a personal level, it's a little hard to look him in the eye outside the bedroom.\n\nWe have yet to go on a date or see a movie/tv show the whole way through. It's essentially been a 2 week bang fest. I know a solution would be to force these getting-to-know-you dates, but now it feels stupid and awkward to try and force conversation after things have been so effortless otherwise.\n\nWe get a long and laugh a lot, but always in the bedroom alone. It got really weird and uncertain when we were out together socialising with mutual friends once. I hated it. Now avoiding those scenarios massively, but it's self defeating to what I want. \n\nWill it even out? How can I get to know him quickly and comfortably? I'm so damn awkward I can't stand it. Help", "summary": "new boy and I are great at sex but haven't attempted a date after 2 weeks of solid bedroom time/ salvageable?"}
{"id": "t3_24q08h", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Tough Decision", "post": "Okay here's the dealeo, I've been texting this girl since November and we've gotten pretty close. I know she likes me and would definitely say yes if I asked her out.\n\nThis is where it gets complicated, there's another girl. I've known her since kindergarten and just this year I have developed \"feelings\" for her. I have no idea if she likes me at all like that, she acts all flirty and stuff, but that's also how she treats her girlfriends.\n\nSo now I have no clue if I should go for a girl I'm not sure I really like and definitely have a chance with, or a girl I might really like and may have no choice with.", "summary": "Cute girl likes me but I'm not sure. Girl I like but I'm not sure if she likes me. Blarg."}
{"id": "t3_2pyiaw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 F] text with a guy [24 M] giving mixed signals?", "post": "So, I'm a bit confused in my situation right now. I'm a college student and I am not looking for a long term relationship and I'm just having a bit of fun right now meeting new people. \n\nAbout a month ago I met this guy and we hit it off pretty well. We had a bunch of the same interests and he was really into me and we started flirting a bit. I give him my number and we text on and off for the next few weeks, and it went very well. \n\nThen suddenly, he stopped texting me and after a few days he said he apologized since he was busy. I told him it wasn't a big deal and to just reply to my texts whenever he wanted. During the next two weeks were dead week and finals week for both him and me in college so I understand why we didn't talk as much.\n\nI was busy studying and he was busy so we barely talked but we would sent random snapchats once in awhile. However, now we have finished finals and now he never texts me or replies to my snapchats, he only replies to me if I message him on snapchat. However our conversations are short but it seems he still enjoys talking to me. He is almost always the first one to see my snapchat stories as well, I'm unsure if that makes a difference.\n\nI would text him once every few days, just to talk about whats going on and I wouldn't get any replies, then I messaged him on snapchat and I asked why he only snapchats instead of texting and he replies almost immediately and says he's been ignoring everyone and all his messages, not just me personally. He reassured me by saying he still wants to hangout and that he wouldn't ditch me but I'm wondering what is up and I'm wondering if I did something wrong? \n\nMaybe he actually isn't that interested, should I just wait for him to talk to me and get on with my life? I know I shouldn't worry about it too much but I'm curious about his attitude. What advice do you have or what would you do? I'm not too committed I would just like a guy's POV for this sort of situation.", "summary": "Met a guy and things were going well. However he stops texting me and only messages through snapchat. Did I do something wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_1hsb94", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[24/F] just found out that my [24/F] SO used to date a guy that I hated", "post": "Backstory: I knew they were friends and he was an asshole. And she always claimed to have never dated him. But last night when I was going through her phone I found an old conversation which was suggestive. I confronted her, she confessed. Obviously this conversation was from before we dated. We've been dating for close to 14 months now and everything is going well.\n\nI don't know how to feel about this. I am mad and she is profusely sorry. But I just can't wrap my head around the fact that she dated that asshole. And that he's been with her. She says there is nothing left to hide and the only reason she kept it from me was because I'd never go out with her had I known, which is probably true. Never the less, it stings to be lied to.\n\nAm I overreacting in being overtly angry? How do you'll think I should progress? \n\nHelp, r/relationships.", "summary": "GF told me about dating a guy I hated before us. I don't know how to react as she claimed to have never dated him."}
{"id": "t3_288ndc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F]and a new friend [20 M] : He likes me but I definitely don't like him? How do I set boundaries nicely?", "post": "I have a guy friend who I made recently and he asks to hang out a lot and whenever we go grab a bite he offers to pay. I always say no but sometimes he is very persistent. He also tries to hug me a lot and texts me rather often. I've just recently met him at work so I find his behaviour a bit odd because even though we're friends, I'm still getting to know him and I don't feel close enough to him to be so touchy feely. Also, I think he may be interested in me, which if he is, I don't want to lead him on but I also don't want him to think I don't appreciate his friendship. I do enjoy hanging out with him but just as a friend.\nHow do I know if he likes me or is just being friendly? How do I set boundaries without being rude? He is fun to hangout with but I'm not a sentimental person and I don't like being touched. I am also not attracted to him at all.\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "If a new guy friend asks to hang out a lot and pay for things does he like you? How do I make it clear I don't like him and can't accept his gifts?"}
{"id": "t3_1wxgp8", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/F] Suddenly attracted to a close friend (22/M)?", "post": "The guy and I have been close friends for 3 years ago and I've never been attracted to him whatsoever. In fact, the mere thought of it used to repulse me. As of about 48 hours ago I am finding myself extremely attracted to him and it's really throwing me off. I'm suddenly finding myself thinking about him a lot in a sexual way and worrying about what I sound like when I talk to him. I have no idea what prompted it or how it's even possible to feel so extremely different in a matter of days. What's worse is that I feel like I gave off \"I would totally fuck you vibes\" at his Super Bowl party yesterday because he ended up talking about sex to me a lot (things like discussing how he hasn't gotten laid in so long etc etc) which is a topic we never really discuss. Granted it was after a few beers. \n\nQuestion is: How can I nip this in the bud? This whole situation just seems like way more trouble than it's worth and we're both second semester seniors in college. I feel like my hormones have been totally out of whack lately and hope that's what is causing this.", "summary": "Sudden attraction to close friend of years. Want it to go away. How do I make that happen/what can I do in the meantime?"}
{"id": "t3_swwo9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just had the weirdest dream I think I've ever had. What about you? What's the weirdest dream that you can remember having?", "post": "I lived with my mother and my brother and idk why but Vince Neil, the lead singer of Motley Crue lived across the street from us. He was a pretty cool neighbor. Wasn't home much been when he was he was a pretty laid back guy who you always heard music coming from his house. \n\nWell, my mother once day comes into the house crying with Vince following behind her. She ushers my brother and I out the door and across the street to Vince's house where he presents my brother and I with the shittiest looking guitar and bass. They looked like some kiddy inspired instruments that The Wiggles would play.(My brother and I are musicians) He hands my brother the guitar and me the bass and says with a shit eating grin \"Welcome home kids.\" \n\nMy brother and I look at each other like WTF. Well we rush over to our mother who says that we aren't her children anymore and tells us to \"go back home.\" So we go back to Vince's and ask him wtf is going on. He tells us that he bought us from our mother for $6000 a person. I take my bass and hold it up in front of him saying \"Dude, these instruments are shit. We're gonna go back to our mom's and get our old ones. They're way fucking better than these.\" He just shrugged and said \"Sure. That's fine, son. I love you.\" I put my hand on his shoulder and said \"Vince, I love you too. But not as a father, more like that neighbor who's really awesome and let's you use his swimming pool a lot.\"", "summary": "Had a dream that my mother sold my brother and I to Vince Neil to be his kids. Told him the instruments he got my brother and I were shit."}
{"id": "t3_1vp8v5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25F] roommates [26F and 30ishF] hate each other and passive aggressively fight all the time. I just moved in, what do I do?", "post": "I just moved in to the perfect apartment, but my roommates are either fighting, not speaking to each other, doing passive aggressive things. The apartment is tiny, so it doesn't help that we are already cramped for space, but it's pretty uncomfortable to live like this. However, I've been moving around for months, so I am not really willing to leave (in case any of you were thinking that).\n\nTheir conflict precedes my tenancy so I definitely don't know the whole story, but from what I've gathered so far, they both have valid points. They have both been really friendly towards me, but they are pretty awful towards each other. I get that roommates don't have to be friends, but it would be nice if they could coexist peacefully instead of waiting for the other one to move out.\n\nReddit, what (if anything) should I do? I don't want to get involved in the conflict and make things worse, but I also don't want to live in such a passive aggressive, negative environment. I was thinking about asking a therapist to have a session with them to sort of mediate the conflict, but that's my only idea.", "summary": "Post-college roommate conflict involving 2 out of 3 roommates. What if anything should I (the third non-involved person) do to resolve it?"}
{"id": "t3_2fn2dd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Advice for a Long Distance Relationship", "post": "I've(f) been with my bf for a year and a half. We're both 18 and we started college. I stayed in the city while he moved upstate for college. When we were on our last date before he moved away I broke down crying on his shoulder for about half an hour. He said he didn't want me to be sad, he wanted me to have fun and meet new people. He also said he never wanted to see me cry like that unless it was at our wedding. He tried calming me down and I stopped crying after a while and I went home.\n\n But I broke down in the train ride home. I never told him that. And last night I wore his sweater and I broke down crying again. I'm crying right now writing this post. It's only been about two weeks since school started and I'm miserable. I want him next to me but I'm not sure what to do. I don't just want to tell him this because he can't change much about the situation.\n\n He wants to go to school and pursue his dreams as do I. I don't want to distract him with this or make him feel guilty for leaving. Neither of us want to be away from each other. I'm trying to stay happy for him but it's not working. Any advice would be appreciated.", "summary": "Me and my Bf of a year and half are separated for college and I don't know how to deal. Help."}
{"id": "t3_3icfmm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "me (18m)had girlfriend (18f) cheat on me, concerned as what to do", "post": "Hey all, thought I would share as I needed to speak to someone about this. \n\nMy gf (F18) rung me today and said she had 'hooked up' with someone at a party two weeks ago. As I later find out it was a party that I was invited to but I declined due to exams week. I originally laughed it off and tell her not to worry, thinking it was literally just making out. Text her again, turns out is was full blown drunken sex of which 5 friends knew about before, during and after, of which none told me. The guy, lets call him 'Peter' supposedly had no idea I existed, which is feasible considering him and my gf were 'supposedly' drunk and high.\n\n It is only once she tells me about this that my male friends (that knew) decided to start supporting me of which they did, and only hesitated in telling me 2 weeks later due to the situation most likely effecting my performance in exams. My gf starts texting me with copious amounts of text messages saying that she had f***ed up, etc, etc. and that she hopes I can forgive her. \n\nWhat concerns me is that this was 1 occasion that I am aware of, and that I cant attend every party/event/gathering that she goes to, which makes me worried thinking that this incident may occur again due to her liking to drink and smoke (as most of everyone I know). I now have to decline going to one of my good friends 18th due to Peter being there, and a vast majority of his peers and that of the probability of a fight breaking out due to my sheer aggression i have towards 'peter' now. \n\nAlthough I may not sound sad through my wording I really, really am and caused me to cry for the first time since I can remember. I feel another contributing factor is my inability stay hard once a condom is on and that of my gf frequently asking for sex, which also depresses me a fair bit knowing I can get and stay hard for everything asides a mere fucking condom.\n\nIm sorry if this is to long/explicit, I just would really like some advice as im really am unsure as to what to do", "summary": "gf of 4 months of whom I really, really like cheated on me and i feel as if it may occur again when she is intoxicated"}
{"id": "t3_35mmrj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my GF [20 F] 6 MO, I have a very troubled past, and I don't feel I'm emotionally there for her, even though she says I am.", "post": "So... I'm adopted, 12 families from 2-3/8, drug addicted bio mom. Years of physical, emotional, and some secure abuse. I've had 3 concussions as well, been hospitalized from being hit by several cars while walking. \n\nI feel like I am emotionally lacking, and I've always been a very factual person in confronting issues. I'm a straightforward INTJ personality type, and I want to know how I can improve myself become more in tune with her. \n\nShe is scatter brained, intelligent, and very understanding most times. We've had a couple arguments, and I've had to work hard to understand where her side comes from, and even if I don't agree, it gets settled. \n\nI can see it causing issues in the future, so any tips on how I can start solving it now? I've always had this problem, but I love her, and her family loves and vice versa. We have no problems at all in our relation at the moment, just want to nip a huge flaw before it starts causing issues.", "summary": "I feel emotionally lacking due to my personality and abuse, I don't want it to strain a good thing. How can I work it out for our relationship long term?"}
{"id": "t3_1hw2vu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hi Reddit! I'm 19 and have until the end of the month to move out, do you have any tips for me?", "post": "As mentioned before, I'm 19 years old. My mom has given me a deadline of a month to move out. I have no credit score yet, and working on finding an apartment. Right now I work about 25 hours a week, and since I've working fairly long at my job, I'm hoping to work with my scheduling manager to get more hours. I also have a car insurance payment coming up at the same time, and am pretty broke.\n\nMy checking and savings accounts are student accounts under her account. I'm going to see about moving to my own account if possible. I'm under 5/3 bank. I also have a savings account that my grandma left me for emergencies after she passed away. However, even though I am of age, they won't let me access it without my mom being there.  I'm not sure if my mom would be malicious enough to use that account. It's technically with my other two accounts, also under hers. Is there anything I can do? \n\nAlso, I'm still fairly uncertain of the process of getting an apartment, and am having a hard time finding any listings. I want to stay fairly low budget, but am willing to pay more to stay in my nicer area for a sense of security. Any tips on apartment searching, apartment life, etc would be much appreciated. \n\nI won't be on too much for a couple of hours as i'm going to take my boyfriend job-hunting, but I'll be back soon to see if anyone has replied. Thanks for your time!", "summary": "Young, kicked out, no credit score, bank accounts are under mom's main account, she may end up malicious with money my gma left me, + how do apartment?"}
{"id": "t3_46mdqa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [48 M] get my partner [46 F] together for 4 years, to manage money and finances better?", "post": "** upate, the money was spent on reasonable things, its just that life costs a lot. She has issues with money. What can I say, that is not hard to understand, really. But I want to change it. The suggestion of the book to read in the thread was helpful.\n\nI learned last night that my partner spent close to $1000 reserved for home renos for her disabled son on groceries, gas, and stuff for Christmas since she has not worked for close to 2 months. \n\nWhen I asked her about it last night, she made up some kind of excuse about how she didn't want to be embarrassed at Christmas time with nothing to give. I told her I wouldn't have cared. \n\nI have gone through hell and back with money issues and I want to be on the right track in my life where money is concerned. \n\nShe has told me before that she hates money, because of what it does. Me I am more philosophical about it and I believe you must have knowledge and understanding of money to have power over it. \n\nThe money can probably be replaced in time without too much of an impact on the overall renovation project. But it is a bad thing. \n\nHow do I educate her and myself about this. I dont want to be hugely in debt ever again in my life. I dont want to be with someone who cant figure these things out with me. Its a deal-breaker.", "summary": "She spent some money over Christmas till now that was reserved for home renos for her disabled son. How can I educate her and myself to be more disciplined and responsible with money?"}
{"id": "t3_540x4g", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/m] Moving away from home and girlfriend [21/f]", "post": "Hey all,\n\nNext month I will be looking to move in with my friend that works at the same location as me. I graduated last semester and this moving situation has been a long time coming. When I originally told my girlfriend about me potentially moving away  (only an hour north from where I currently live) she was very angry that I did not ask her to live together first. She is still in University (which is an hour south of where I currently live) and plans on moving away to Graduate School afterwards as well (to another state). She also dorms at Uni, so I guess I assumed too much when thinking about this decision. When she was originally angry about it I looked up what the middleground would be for us to move in together instead. Both of us would have over an hour commute to school or work if we met exactly in the middle. She is also trying to save for graduate school because she will be paying for graduate school herself. Also her dorm is paid for by her scholarship. I understand that moving in together is the next step, and it would be amazing to live together and have that experience, but to me it made little sense economically. We can still see each other on the weekends, and she can even live there on the weekends rent free if she wanted. How do I come up with a solution to this issue with her? I am willing to compromise and come up with a solution (and my friend doesn't really care if we live together it just made sense to us because we will be working at the same place so we wanted to save some money). \n\nWe have been dating for approximately 1 year.", "summary": "Moving away from home and girlfriend is mad that we did not come up with a living situation before I discussed it with my friend."}
{"id": "t3_3bxms8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My wife [27 F] doesn't take criticism well. What can I [26 M] do to fix this?", "post": "There are a few things that she does very well, and I praise her for it. But she assumes/thinks she's excellent at everything she does, and that isn't true. \n\nFor example, the other day she wrote a song, and there was a line that it didn't make sense. I told her:\n\n \"Hey, I don't really get X line. It doesn't make much sense because it implies Y when I know you're actually trying to say Z\"\n\nSo instead of her taking the feedback, think about it for a second, or argue why she wrote that way. She freaked out, and said that I was wrong. How is it even possible that I understood that line like that, etc... \n\nAt another time, she cooked something and she put too much salt on the food. She asked \"How is it?\" and I told her \"I really liked X and Y, but I think Z is a bit salty for my taste\"\n\nShe freaked out again. She told me that's how the dish is and that I don't have an 'educated' palate.\n\nI could keep going and going, but I think you get the point. Every single time I give her feedback, and I tell her that she can do something better. She freaks out because she think she has a gift to be great at everything she does. She has quite literally said that.\n\nWhat is an effective way to give her honest feedback without her freaking out?", "summary": "If I provide constructive feedback to my wife, she freaks out. What is an efficient way to give constructive feedback without getting on her nerves?"}
{"id": "t3_2c9ixr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [29M] almost lost a 3y relationship with [32F] due to my being possessive and controlling. I've gotten a second chance and don't want to make the same mistakes.", "post": "29M Almost recently lost a 3 year relationship (w/ 32F) due to my being possessive and at times controlling. When I asked her to marry me this fall, when I was honestly unaware I was doing this, she was extremely happy, but within the next few weeks, she realised she could not be with a person who made her feel this way. She always felt like she was walking on eggshells, and was, deep down, not happy. \n\nThings feel appart in a bad way (emotional affaire on her part).  But, after a long, hard period of working things out and realising that we truely want to make it work, we're giving it a very positive second chance. She is very enthusiastic about it, and wants it to work as much as I do.  I don't want to make the same mistakes again. I was her to be free to be herself, and not feel untrusting towards her. \n\nI've become very introspective, and have spend much time reading about possessive relationships, dating \"losers\" and whatnot. Though I most definitaly do to match most categories of what these \"Are you dating a loser\" articles point out, there are a few that unfortunately are dead on to how she felt.", "summary": "Could I have advice as to how to ensure I do not make the same errors of being possessive and controlling? I really want to be a better person and change. Thanks : )"}
{"id": "t3_4hzky3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27M] am angry at her [27F] for lying, don't know if overreacting", "post": "So the other night she wen't out with one of her gf's, the next morning she decided to tell me she stayed at her girl friend's because when they realized the time it was too late at night and she lived nearby.\n\nThat same afternoon we are talking again and she tells me a different story, she tells me she left her friend to attend a late class she's been taking, then she came back with her and some other bunch of male friends then they all decided to stay in one of these male friends house. \n\nThis bothered me quite a lot, i don't know if i'm overreacting, you have to know i have trust issues, and this kind of things just makes it worse. When i asked her why she changed the story she just said she didn't want to bore me with details.\n\nIt is worth to tell you i have seen hear lie the shit out of her family and friends before, usually because she tells them she is going to be someplace or doing something and she actually is with me. \n\nYou think i'm overreacting? Because i'm hurt, i don't feel i can have a relationship with someone i can't trust and that i can't tell how many times have lied to me.", "summary": "first she told me she stayed at a girl friend's then she told me later she stayed at a male friend's with a different group of people. I have trust issues."}
{"id": "t3_339x9y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my best friend [23 M] 8 years , I messed up and broke his trust, he said we're done. Help", "post": "I'm writing on my phone so I apologize for any mistakes in advance. We recently started a friend with benefits relationship after being close friends for 8 years and he made it clear it was not exclusive at the beginning but that he would tell me if he slept with anyone else. He hinted that he did things with another girl and I acted emotionally and looked through his messages. I was completely in the wrong for this and I know that. I found that he got a blowjob /went down on her, and confronted him about it and he said he did but that he didn't sleep with anyone else because he didn't want to betray my trust. I believe him 100% on this. He said that this was a huge fucking betrayal of trust to him and that we're done and he wants to cut contact. He believes in second chances but apparently I used it when I hurt him by accidentally calling him by my Ex's name in bed one time. He said emotionally he still cares for me and it makes him happy to make me happy, but logically it's better to cut it off as the trust is gone.\n\nHe means a lot to me and I really can't just watch what we've had go down the drain from this one mistake I made. I'm thinking of asking him for a second chance by saying the name incident didn't impact our friendship, and that this incident is the first time I've betrayed his trust and damaged our friendship. \n\nHe's a very logical person, this is likely the only email I'll send, I'll let it go if he doesn't agree after this. So the email is very important. How do I go about telling him that I want us to be friends again and to give me a chance in as logically a way as possible? And actions speak louder than words, so is there anything I can do at this point to show my sincerity in wanting to stay friends?", "summary": "broke my best friends trust and he wants to cut contact, how do I show him through actions and words to give me a chance?"}
{"id": "t3_uwvid", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Zero enthusiasm despite meeting as close to \"perfect\" as I could hope.", "post": "(Moved from /r/relationships) \n\nMe 31M, her 26F. Backstory: A few years back I had a life altering break-up. Slowly picked myself and got back out there, had some fun with a few women on a strictly casual basis. I've been single (and near celibate) for roughly a year as I've been trying to find someone more girlfriend material than one night stand types, and due to my job I rarely run into anybody looking for more than an easy hook-up. \n\nRecently, I met a girl through work who stopped me dead in my tracks. She's as close to physically perfect as I could think of, with a sweet personality too (if a little spacy).\n\nAfter gauging our interactions I asked for her number which she seemed surprised but happy with. Knowing there would be at least one more work event where we would be together, I hesitated initiating anything as I would hate to make things uncomfortable professionally. \n\nOn our second meeting at work she was showing signs of interest.  At a separate event, colleagues in other departments mentioned how she wouldn't stop talking about me. If I left the building she would ask where I was, apparently as if she was worried I'd bailed on her without asking her out. \n\nShe went out of her way to find me as she was leaving, and while she was in my office, I told her I would love to take her out sometime. She smiled, got a little shy again but said to text her and let her know.\n\nFor some reason, I'm not really that bothered. I don't get the buzz from messaging her, and I really can't find the motivation to actually do anything more than the run of the mill first date, despite how attractive I find her. \n\nHow can I pick myself up a bit and try to make a go of this? It seems really strange how little effort I feel like expending and I think I might be missing out of I don't.", "summary": "Off the dating grid for a while. Met a sweetheart of girl, but I can't get any enthusiasm towards dating her."}
{"id": "t3_3u5hoh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [37F] with my Co-worker [62F] calls me kid all the time.", "post": "My co-worker62 calls me and my other co-worker (f42) \"Kid\".  For example she'll say \"Kids when you get a minute can we get together and go over XYZ\"  She does this a few times a month.  It's really starting to get on my nerves.  My co-worker and I are no where near \"kid\" age.  \n\nAlso, co-worker62 has never been married or had children.  So it's not like it's some kind of habit from being a mom.   She's the program manager and my and co-worker42 are her alternates.  I feel it's a way to \"put us in our place\".   We work in a professional environment and all have higher education.  (actually me and co-worker42 are more educated)  \n\nHas anyone else dealt with this behavior from a co-worker?", "summary": "Co-worker62 call me and my other co-worker42 \"kids\".  Has anyone else dealt with this?"}
{"id": "t3_w4p45", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, how can I get back at my neighbors?", "post": "So my family and I have a set of older neighbors that live behind and are constantly giving us a hard time.  Every time we do something in our backyard they are over complaining about it, checking if we have permits, making sure it is our property etc etc.  We one time trimmed the branches on a tree in our yard and they freaked out about it.  Additionally, when my sister and I were in middle school and highschool(prior to being able to drive), we would cut through the very edge of their yard and another neighbors yard.  One day they flipped out on us that we were killing their lawn(which we weren't).  This summer I recently caught the older gentlemen who lives cutting through our yard after his morning walks.  They also just cut down bushes and piled them right on the border of our yard behind their fence(still their property so we can't do anything).  What can I do to annoy these people in a legal and funny manner?", "summary": "I have neighbors that give my family and I a hard time a lot, and are looking to get back at them in legal and funny manner."}
{"id": "t3_17vfox", "subreddit": "Cooking", "title": "My girlfriend has had Lyme Disease since before we met. She wants pancakes when she gets better because she can't have them now. How do I make the best pancakes ever?", "post": "My girlfriend and I met last year at the orientation for our doctoral Biochemistry program. She's from northern Virginia, where the deer tick-borne Borrelia bacterium causative in Lyme Disease is a real problem. She told me her stupid neighbors were seen feeding deer. Dumb. That's another story, though.\n\nThe treatment so far has involved several 9-week regimens of antibiotic cocktails, supplements, and probiotics. I remember one antibiotic she was taking that looked like yellow paint she had to squirt 10 mL of into her mouth twice a day. She said it tasted godawful, too. She's been miserable every day and makes me look like a total baby, because I stay home if I have a tummy-ache and she constantly works about 40 hours a week in lab.\n\nAlong with Lyme Disease, she has Gastroparesis, which severely limits what she can eat. In addition, the doctor told her that she shouldn't eat food with gluten because she may become allergic to it as a result of this treatment. Usually, she just eats rice products and yogurt.\n\nShe told me that when she gets better, the thing she's looking forward to the most is eating pancakes. \n\nI can't cook. Like, at all.\n\nHow do I make the best pancakes ever? I want to get the right cooking equipment, the best batter possible, etc. I'm willing to pay a lot of money to make them wonderful.", "summary": "Girlfriend has Lyme Disease, isn't allowed to eat gluten because of the treatment, and wants pancakes when it's done. How do I make the best pancakes in existence?"}
{"id": "t3_1zgi4a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23m) am ambitious and studious, while my 'gf' (25f) is lazy and never studies.", "post": "Long story short, I've known my 'gf' for 5 months and we've never had the talk about exclusivity, but we're only seeing eachother.  \n\nI study a lot, go to the gym a lot, I'm athletic and I have set career and academic goals that I'm sweating my balls off to make sure I achieve. Meanwhile, my gf goes to the gym maybe once a month (more like a social thing with her bestie than workout) and doesn't put much work into her career and future (my gpa is 3.6, hers is 2.4). She'll be starting university within an year and while she got through community college without studying much at all, she'll struggle a lot in university.\n\nWe both had rough pasts, but it seems like I've bounced back better than her. She has made a lot of progress in getting her shit together but I want to motivate her to achieve even more.", "summary": "I'm very career driven, gf is very party driven. We're at a point of our lives where partying all the time won't be sustainable soon so I'm trying to motivate my gf into being more career driven."}
{"id": "t3_4uqne0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF (27 F) used my (27 M) car to try to catch a rare Pokemon in Pokemon Go. I asked her not to do it again - am I in the wrong?", "post": "My girlfriend came into our home office this afternoon and told me she had 7-8 minutes to catch a rare pokemon in Pokemon Go. She said she could not get there in time walking and that she needed my car. I was reluctant to let her use it but could see that this battle wasn't worth fighting so I let her go.\n\nShe came back and told me she couldn't get there in time. I told her sorry and asked her to please not use my car again. She didn't understand why I would tell her not to use my car, so I tried to explain my thoughts. I told her I felt like she'd be rushing and could end up in an accident. I also told her that I think there's a point where you have to draw the line between a reasonable way to play the game and when you're getting a little 'too deep', so to speak.\n\nShe said that I was being controlling and that I was being irrational. She said that I just didn't want her to play the game anymore. I told her that she can play the game as much as she wants and can run off to catch Pokemon if that's what she wants to do, I just didn't want her to use my car to do it. \n\nI don't play the game so maybe I can't necessarily relate to what this particular event meant to her. But I wanted to draw the line somewhere and to my uninitiated brain, this seemed like a reasonable request.\n\nAm I being irrational? Is th\nere another way I can explain this to her? \n\nWe've been together 8 years.", "summary": "GF wants the option to use my car to catch Pokemon in Pokemon Go but I said no. She's mad, am I controlling?"}
{"id": "t3_4x87sy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (25M) gf (25F) are struggling to compromise in our vacation plans. Any advice?", "post": "Basically, I am for option 1 (Cali road trip), she is for option 2 (teton-yellowstone-glacier road trip). There is no reasonable way to make any of the destinations overlap. I've been to some of the option 1 places once before, and most of the option 2 places twice before. She hasn't been to any of them. Option 1 is ending up being a little bit cheaper as well. I make a lot more money than her and we are splitting costs accordingly, mostly meaning that most of the cost is going to be my financial burden. So far, we have been pretty even in determining our vacation destinations. Basically, we can't get each other to convince the other about the plan. I feel like someone is going to be left disappointed.", "summary": "gf and I can't decide in vacation plans. I don't want either myself (who is paying) or her to be disappointed."}
{"id": "t3_1suxva", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24F] Trying to plan a trip overseas with my boyfriend [25M] but he won't help. What should I do?", "post": "A few months ago my boyfriend [25M] and I [24F] booked flights for an overseas holiday that would take place early next year (Jan 2014). We have been living together for 4 years and have always wanted to travel together. Initially the plan was to travel around Europe for 3 months. However recently my boyfriend refuses to participate in organising the holiday - he won't even discuss what countries he would like to see! There is always an excuse for not getting involved (e.g. He is tired, wants to watch the game, etc) and he says that I am \"nagging\" when I try to bring it up. \n\nSince booking the flights my boyfriend lost his job and it was understood that I would be primarily responsible for funding the holiday. Is it really worth organising, taking time off work and spending so much money on something that he doesn't even seem to be interested in?", "summary": "Trying to organise a holiday to Europe (which I am paying for) with my boyfriend but he won't talk about it. Is it actually feasible for the holiday to go ahead?"}
{"id": "t3_2wckgn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 F] with my husband [30 M] 2.5 years living together 7mo married, How to curb his spending habits without fighting", "post": "When we started living together my income was low and he managed the bills. As time went on i started seeing late payment notices and to avoid fights when i found them I decided to take over the money management. He was given $200 a month as a free spending allowance. I knew he had some money issues in the past, credit card dept and a defaulted loan, all paid off before we met. So i should have realized he has some spending issues.\n\nLast year he received two large raises and a job change and i received a substantial pay raise as well. Our household income went from 50k to 100k. After a year of agressively paying down his student loans we now have between the house and his loans we have 97k in debt. Because out monthly bills haven't increased I want to pay off debts and work on saving for an emergency fund.\n\nThe issues started when my husband realized how much we now made. He has always been a generous man, but now he buys people food when he is out with his friends. He feels that because we make more we can spend more. He also has been buying alot of video games, eating out, splurging on groceries. \n\ni want him to cut down on his spending but when i bring up when he goes over on stuff it always ends up like im the bad guy. I need a better way to get it into his head that we cant just spend all the new money. To make maters worse one of our cars got totaled and we cleared out our savings (not the emergency fund) to buy a used one. I told him we have to live tight for a while and the next day he is asking if we can go out to sushi!", "summary": "Our income went up and My husband wants to spend not pay down debts. How do i clamp down on his spending without being the badguy."}
{"id": "t3_1ankno", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] cheated on my boyfriend [24M], it meant nothing to me, I was totally honest with him about it and he didn't mind.", "post": "I don't quite know how to feel about it. I feel like shit about what I did. I got drunk and just ended up fooling around with a guy I barely know because he was interested and cute and nice.\n\nI don't have the perfect relationship with my boyfriend, I often feel inadequate and unattractive because of how he treats me and how he still is infatuated with his ex. I don know if I was just trying to feel wanted by hooking up with this guy, but it is no excuse. I got a ride home from a friend and told my boyfriend as soon as I got home- before I even kissed him or hugged him because I didn't want to deceive him as he has done to me when he cheated on me (he lied about it for over a week about what actually happened- it just got worse and worse when the truth came out. I forgave him, obviously) but maybe subconsciously I did this to \"get back at him\". I don't think I did, but I can't imagine why I'd do this to him otherwise.\n\nWhen I told my boyfriend he said \"it's okay\" and I asked \"are you sure?\" and he said \"of course, baby, I love you, it's fine\". \n\nI'm both relived and even more guilty because of his reaction. I would be so mad if it was him (even knowing that in my slip up it meant nothing) and I feel like I don't deserve his forgiveness. I was SO hurt when he cheated on me, it almost feels off that he isn't hurt... As in- does he not care as much about the relationship as I do?\n\nAm I over thinking this? Should I just let this incident fade into obscurity and move on, or should I try to talk more in depth about this? \n\nThanks in advance. It is really complicated and awful and I feel like the shittiest person alive despite his forgiveness. I think maybe it is because I still haven't forgiven him 100%?", "summary": "cheated on bf who cheated on me, he forgave me, but I'm not sure how I feel about his forgiveness and now I'm questioning if I've forgiven him as completely as I thought."}
{"id": "t3_1082b8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's something that you tried to tell people that was true, but no one believed you?", "post": "For me, it was when I was 2 or 3. I had this terrible daycare provider. She would force me to eat when I wasn't hungry, scream at me, and even make me change my own diaper. I was 2 for Christ sakes. She once made me clean up my own throw up with my sweatshirt. I'd always tell my parents/grandparents that I didnt want to go because she was a \"mean lady\". No one believed me.\n\nOne day, a friend of my mom sent her daughter there, and she saw what that witch did to me. She probably said something not too descriptive being that we were 2, but it was enough to get people to believe me. \n\nAfter that my dad came, cussed her out, and then she demanded the months pay. My dad spit at her and then left.", "summary": "crazy daycare lady makes me clean up my own throw up/shit. Noone believes me being I am 2. Parents find out and shit goes down."}
{"id": "t3_242n8z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20 F) feel like my boyfriend (24 M) of 7 months has no time for me anymore.", "post": "When my so and I started dating, we talked constantly every day and saw each other 3-4 days per week. Within these past two weeks, I feel like I have to start conversations with him or else he won't even text or call me. And I see him once a week now. Granted, he doesn't have a car so he can't visit me right now, and I understand that aspect, it just doesn't seem like he wants me around. He tells me he is thinking about us moving in together, but how are we supposed to do that when we don't really communicate at all anymore? I have talked to him before about the distance I feel from us not talking but ask he says is sorry and doesn't really change. Should I be worried? Should I even stay if he can't give me the time of day anymore? Blaghughughughagh. I need advice as to how to handle this.", "summary": "boyfriend doesn't really give me the time of day anymore, but still wants to move in together. How should I handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_w9ed9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm scared to have sex and girlfriend may leave me because of it - what to do?", "post": "My GF (19) and I (19M) have been going out for about a year. She is my first girlfriend and we both love each other. Other than a few small fights, we get along great and have no real problems, other than one. I won't have sex. It's not a physiological thing, as we do everything else, but I am absolutely terrified of pregnancy. I know that she would never consider abortion and the idea of her getting pregnant, even if it's a tiny chance, fills me with dread. I would never have unprotected sex, and if I did have sex, I'd wear a condom (she's on the pill). I know that given both those methods the chances of pregnancy are incredibly slim, but to my paranoid mind, it's not good enough and I choose not to have sex (even though many times I really want to). I will have sex one day, but I think I should be ready to be a father, should that happen, when I do have sex. My GF knew about how I felt about sex from basically the beginning of our relationship and said it wasn't a huge problem and that we could work around it. She now says it's a problem and that we need to talk about it and 'work towards it'. I know it's a completely reasonable idea, but deep down I know I'm not gonna change my mind, and I'm scared she's gonna leave me because of that. What should I do? Do I tell her outright that I just won't change my mind? Or do I say \"we can work towards it\" even though I know it probably won't change? I love her and don't want to lose her. Any help/advice would be greatly appreciated :). Thanks in advance!", "summary": "I'm scared to have sex, GF knew from the outset and said it was fine. Now, she says it's a problem but I know my mind isn't going to change."}
{"id": "t3_155p76", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "26F needs help dealing with her Heroin addict 47m father", "post": "***Let me start off by saying I am a horrible speller and bad at grammar do to learning disables.\n***\n I**(26f)** need help dealing with my **(46)** homeless Heroin addict **father**. I really have no help at all with my other family members my**(26)** twin sister is a meth addict who is now 7 months clean. My**(23)** little sister is a meth, heroin, whore in a gang. My mother OD on Meth and died 8 years ago. I spent my whole life in special ed classes. Due to my family drug problems I was able to over come a lot of limits the doctors placed me on. \nBut my father is a homeless heroin addict. I set up interviews for rehabs and shelters I cannot do all the paperwork for him due to my disables and his age. I fear meeting my father alone due to that fact he is around my little sister a lot. She is in a gang. All this keeps me up at night I want to help my father but I do not know how. I want to be safe. I know bring my father into my**(27)** boyfriend and mine house will put us in danger and end our relationship. I do not want this whoever all this keeps me awake at night. \nMy twin sister who is clean will not deal or help me deal with this she is to far into her own recovery to care or want to care. I do not know what to do anymore. It is clear my family is no longer anything due to drugs. I have smoked pot a few times I do not like it, I have nothing to due with drugs. I have so much in my life to deal with and his is not helping. Please give me good ideas who to deal with this.", "summary": "I need help finding away so I can sleep at night without meds. To find peace with myself. And away to help my dad before he ODs or does something stupid."}
{"id": "t3_4fji47", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [30F] mother's [59F] financial irresponsibility is becoming untenable", "post": "Way, way back when I was in high school, my mother was the unfortunate victim of a workplace accident.  She's been disabled since then, but she got pretty screwed over in the courts and sees very little money for it.  As such, after college I moved back home to help care for her financially and to help with what physical tasks she just can't handle any more (lifting, groceries, stairs, etc.).  I do okay for myself, but nowhere near well enough that I could support her without living together, which is quite trying at this age...\n\nWe split the bills as best we can.  She handles the food (since I don't drive) and two of her own, personal bills, which leaves her with a bit of spending money, while I handle basically everything else, including her credit cards.  This last one is where the issue lies.  We have had *countless* discussions about these credit cards and promises are made about curtailing spending and putting them away, but *nothing* ever changes.  In the past four months, she's charged over $3,500!  If I were to bring this up, she'd just tell me how it's because of the car ($600) or how she's returned a lot of things ($1,000), but it still doesn't make up for her spending.\n\nI'm at my wits' end here.  I've got student loans out of the *ass* that I'm almost never going to get paid off, while $250 of *my* money gets siphoned off into her spending habits every month.  The idea of moving out and letting her figure out her own life becomes more and more appealing as time goes on, but in her financial situation I don't see how she could survive...", "summary": "My mother's spending is out of control and no amount of talking changes things.  I want to gtfo out of this situation, but I'd be leaving her high and dry"}
{"id": "t3_33qcfq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 F] was invited to the same event by my friend [20 F] and the guy I'm seeing [21 M]", "post": "So yeah. My friend (let's call her Casey) has been having a rough time with some personal stuff and I thought I'd invite her to hang out this weekend. She invited me to a play that's happening tonight and I agreed. Well, I started casually seeing this guy (let's call him Jake) about a month ago. We've had a couple dates but we don't talk much and I haven't gotten to hang out with him much lately because I'm busy with finals and projects. So he texted me and asked if I wanted to go to the play with him. \n\nI'm not sure what to do. I technically agreed to go with Casey first, but if I show up with her and we run into each other, it'll be awkward. I don't know if I should invite him to tag along. Casey's recently been having some trouble with a couple of our friends who are dating and keep treating her like a third wheel, so I don't want to do that to her. Not to mention this is supposed to be a \"you're having a rough time so let's have a girls night\" kind of thing. But if I try to explain that to Jake I don't think he'll understand. I'm worried he'll get the impression that I'm not willing to make time for him. He's leaving in about a week and a half and we won't see each other all summer, and I really don't have any free time this weekend at all, so yeah. What should I do?", "summary": "Friend invited me to play, guy I'm casually dating invited me to the same play, but I'm not sure who to go with or what to tell the guy"}
{"id": "t3_4xnyxd", "subreddit": "running", "title": "[RACE REPORT] Louisbourg Race Through Time", "post": "**RACE DESCRIPTION:** A race 8 miles in length between two towns 272 years apart. Go from the year 2016 and run to the year 1744 and back again.\n\n**BACKGROUND:** Typical story. Dropped weight and started the /r/c25k program in april 2015. Never ran before that. I transitioned through b210k and a half-marathon training plan. Did my first half. Ran a bunch since then and completed a 27.5k trail race this past June.\n\n**TRAINING:** I have a marathon in September so my training has been focused towards that. This race was a \"training run\".\n\n**COURSE:** An easy peasy loop. You run on asphalt for most of it before transitioning to dirt roads and paths. \n\n**BREAKDOWN:** Ran at a good pace, no real complaints. \n\n**FOOTWEAR:** Hoka One One Challenger ATRs. Loved 'em.", "summary": "I finished an 8 mile race (1:06:32/8:18), set some new PRs, and just really enjoyed the experience. Will be back next year for sure."}
{"id": "t3_qqrcc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you know what \"vibe\" you're giving off?", "post": "I'm a generally friendly person and I get bored at school, so I like to have conversations with people. However, more often than not, I don't want to date the person or even hang out with them in \"real life\". I am very particular about the people I want to be friends with or date and I'm very observent of people's behavior and know fairly quickly what sort of relationship I'd want with the person. I can have a great conversation and have a lot in common with the person but feel no burning desire to hang out with them outside of a school setting. My problem is that a lot of the time people seem to misunderstand my intentions and mistake my friendly behavior as being interested in them (guys) or wanting to hang out with them. Personally, I get **really** irked if a person I talk to assumes that I'm interested in them and tries to pursue me, as a result of their pursuit, I usually end up avoiding them or ignoring them. Am I just being weird? If so, how do I fix it? and how do I know what \"vibe\" I'm giving off? So I can be more careful in the future.", "summary": "I can have a great conversation and lots in common with no intention of ever talking to that person again and get annoyed when they misconstrue my behavior."}
{"id": "t3_gyb3f", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I think somebody is generously \"borrowing\" from a field guide I wrote on my blog.  Should I be upset about this?", "post": "I'm a Folklore and Arts Admin student, and I frequently takes classes where I have to use my Wordpress blog for assignments.  Last year I put together a fairly comprehensive ['field guide' about lolcats]  About two months ago, I started noticing a bunch of hits on the lolcat guide.  I got bored one afternoon and decided to see how quickly I could find my guide using Google, and I came across [this guide]  Some of the language and topic pages seemed similar to mine, but I figured that there's only so much to be said about lolcats, so some overlap was natural.  That was about a week ago.\n\nJust now, I checked my blog stats again, and I've had another spike in activity on the lolcat page.  I went back to the guide on the other site, and they've added new pages to their guide, which have even more similarities to mine.  I wouldn't mind if it was just the images (obviously I found the lolcats I used through Google and whatnot), but I feel like this person is using my words as well.\n\nSome of the pages on their guide appear to have been up long before mine, but they've been making a lot of changes and additions recently.  All I really want is that, if they are using my guide to supplement theirs, they at least include a link to my guide or a reference somewhere.  I worked on it for months, and it was the foundation for a paper about lolcats that I presented at a folklore conference this Fall.\n\nAt the same time, I can't help thinking maybe I'm just over-analyzing this and I should just be glad people are enjoying my field guide?  Some of the places where they've 'borrowed' are pretty minor, but there's a lot of them.", "summary": "after lots of hits on a lolcat field guide I wrote, another lolcat guide has similarities.  Can't decide if it's plagiarism, or how much I should care."}
{"id": "t3_4o8stl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my Friend [25F], not sure if im being lead on.", "post": "Firstly, I knew this girl from college and high school but we never hung out directly, I actually had a bit of a crush on one of her flatmates when we met. I only started hanging out with her about a year or so ago when she was coming to the end of a messy break up. \n\nWe became good friends, we hung out and smoked up together. We went on road trips, out for meals and really got on really well. I stupidly moved too soon and within a few months of intense texting and hanging out, I told her that I liked her. She said her head was still in a mess and we put aside our amazing friendship for a while to \"cool down\".  The problem, is that nothing really cooled down, she picked right back from where we left off the following week as if the conversation the week prior had never happened.\n\nLots of texting, lots of flirting, still going out on \"dates that are not actually dates\" and alike. This has been going on a few months and I really really like this chick, but I dont want to move in too quickly again. I get great vibes 99% of the time, and sometimes it can really feel like we are a couple. (Despite not being a couple) Just recently she has started mentioning other guys to me, despite her still being quite cute and affectionate towards me & wanting to make future plans with me (this week, next week, next month, next year) . She even mentioned that she was texting a guy who \"doesnt really suit her\" and that she doesnt really have any interest in him, despite my amazing ability of changing the subject, she still doesnt seem to get the hint that I dont really want to hear about him.\n\nIt feels like ive waited in limbo forever and now my chance has just wizzed by. Or maybe it hasnt? I just dont understand why she would want to spend so much time with me, do cool things with me, be cute and make future plans with me & then kicks me in the balls by telling me about other guys who hit on her?", "summary": "Hot and cold signals on a daily basis & feels like we are a couple but we are not a couple. I moved too fast last time, now im scared to move at all."}
{"id": "t3_28utbj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I 23(m) loves attention but mostly from women that aren't my girlfriend 22(f). One year relationship.", "post": "Mg girlfriend is loving and supportive. I encourage her to express her self sexually since she is so much more conservative than I am and she has, she feels comfortable around me eyeing other guys and just expressing who she finds attractive which is a big step for her. I don't have a problem with it and I'm happy we're becoming more comfortable with each other. What I wanted to know is that even though we mess around and I enjoy where we are sexually, is it unfair of me to desire more attention? She tells me she loves me and when we mess around she expresses how sexy I am, but I went out tonight and some women hit on me and told me I'm handsome and had a beautiful smile etc. Am I an asshole for loving this attention? Is this normal?", "summary": "My girlfriend is amazing but I enjoy the compliments other women give me more than the ones given by her. Am I fucked up? Help!!!"}
{"id": "t3_1cdy6y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I'm having a bit of a problem. I tracked my stolen phone online but I don't know how to get it back.", "post": "On Saturday night I was out on the town, after running away from everyone I knew in a drunken attempt at a joke I ended up at home without my phone.\nSo I used icloud the next morning (which is pretty cool by the way) and tracked my phone to an apartment building a few neighbourhoods over. Set a message on the screen saying \"call my roommates number and i'll even give you a reward\" ... But got no call.\nThen I called the non-emergency police to see if they could swing by and get it all serious style, but that was a no go.\nI can see that it's still there but it's now on 5% battery and might soon be lost forever.\nWhat do I do? Knock down every door in this apartment complex hoping some good person will give it back but potentially get shanked in the process? Or just consider it a write off and move on?", "summary": "lost my phone, tracked it, it's in an apartment complex across town, police couldn't help... WHAT DO I DO"}
{"id": "t3_39rzuv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Might be in love with my best friend", "post": "I [17,M] Just finished junior year of high school, and I have really strong feelings for my best friend of the last few years. She's everything and more than I've ever wanted. We have the same interests, goals, plans, and sense of humor, besides her being the prettiest thing in all creation. \nI don't want to make the friendship (remember: best friend)  awkward with unrequited feelings, but also don't want to miss my opportunity. From a distance of seems like I should go for it, but she is much better looking than me, and seems to lose interest in guys really quickly sometimes. She has basically her pick of anyone she wants to date, being who she is. \nOn top of all this I'm so vastly inexperienced with relationships I have no idea what to do and what will happen.", "summary": "have feelings for a close friend, but don't know if the feelings are mutual. Don't want to rush things or complicate a friendship with unrequited feelings."}
{"id": "t3_27ptxy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with my bf [28M] have been together for almost 2 years. He does cocaine and I am not okay with it.", "post": "My boyfriend has an addictive personality. He used to be addicted to meth but has been clean now for a few years. He is also a heavy drinker. I found out he did coke a couple of months into our relationship. I've tried being cool about it but then he started lying to me about his use. I've asked him to stop and he has said he will but still doesn't stop.\n\nIt doesn't seem like he uses it a lot but I am worried about his health. Whenever certain friends come around, he can't help but give in and do coke with them. I love him and we have talked about kids and getting married and I am worried he will never be able to stop. He tells me he can stop whenever he likes, but I feel if he doesn't stop now, how will he be able to stop 5 years down the line. His friends are telling him to be a man and don't let her \"cut of your balls\". All I am asking is he stops doing cocaine. I'm not asking anything else of him.", "summary": "I am really worried about my bf's health and wish he would stop doing cocaine before it gets worse. Am I the crazy one here?"}
{"id": "t3_3yu85r", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by cursing out my phone", "post": "So this was a few weeks ago, and I'm applying for a job at a local restaurant. My phone has been pretty slow recently, and occasionally freezes under intense use. \n\nAnyway, I call the boss of the place and start talking to him. He seemed pretty cool, and was Asian so he was a bit hard to understand. We talk for 5 minutes or so and I'm about halfway into a pre-interview (basically he was just getting my info and stuff) when suddenly I stop hearing his voice. \n\nShit.\n\nI look down at my phone, no display. Shake it, tap the power button, nothing. Balls, it froze.\n\nI look at my phone and yell \"YOU STUPID PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT GOD DAMMIT\" and proceed to be pissed at my phone for a solid 30 seconds before calming down and restarting my ~~shitbrick~~phone. \n\nI call him back and he seems much more softspoken. We hang up without scheduling an official interview. Damn\n\nSo around a week later I decide to listen to the phonecall, because I was curious what went wrong. I apologised for my phone cutting out and everything, so I had no idea why he was so different after my phone dropped.\n\nSo I listen to my recorded calls. Apparently my phone has a freezing order or some shit, because it cut out my speaker and screen before the apps running in the background- like my phone, recorder, and **my microphone.**\n\nSo at the end of my phonecall, my would-be employer got the entirety of my vulgar vocabulary while I thought my phone was off.", "summary": "On the phone with my would-be boss, phone froze, cursed out my phone and didnt realize he heard all of it till a week later"}
{"id": "t3_3mpzfy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by kicking a woman's coffee as she tried to get it on the bus", "post": "As lurking has taught me: mandatory \"This actually just happened!\"\n\nThis happened barely 10minutes ago and the shame is ever soo fresh..\n\nSoo here I was sitting on the bus listening to music and watching the peasents walking on the curb as I drove by, when I suddenly felt something tapping my shoe.\nWatching the lady infront of me bending down I naturally assumed she dropped something and bent down to help her pick it up.\n\nWhat I saw was a cardboard coffee-cup with the plastic mouthcover toward me, spilling out the juices. I didnt want to touch her plastic thingy, but I wanted to help her, soo my brain, smart as it is started telling my foot to gently tap it towards her. Again I didnt want to touch the plastic cause that would only make it moore dirty.\n\nIn an instant flurry off emotions and the \"F***ING NOW OR NEVER!!\" sensation deer get when they want to cross the road, my foot went for it!\n\nI turned this presumably nice lady's cardboard cup into a missile and launched it through her feet, into the midway and 6-ish seets down the line. The lady sit's up straight, looks at me with the \"dude, the f*ck..\" kinda look, sighs and goes for her coffee. Wich now is surrounded by a wall shaming eyes.\n\nIm sry presumably nice lady!!", "summary": "Lady dropped her coffee, I kicked it, she got blamed for spilling coffee all along the midsection off the bus."}
{"id": "t3_3bd58t", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by using the phrase guerilla tactics", "post": "Hm well I was playing Risk with some teenagers at my cousin's house .  One of them was a black kid named J-.  They didn't have a lot of experience with the game, and so they weren't massing their forces at their borders, they kind of scattered their troops willy nilly all over the board.  This kid J- makes some newbie moves during his turn that didn't work out well-- he was attacking my large armies with smaller armies, and he couldn't use all the attack di, so it would be for instance his two attack di versus my two defence di, giving me a significant advantage.  The other kids were teasing him about this, so I said 'He's just using guerilla tactics'.  Everything became quiet.  Someone to my right said 'What?!' The boy looked at me incredulously with some pain in his eyes.  It dawned on me that they had probably understood it as 'gorilla tactics', and thought I was making a racial slur.  I mumbled something about 'yea, guerilla tactics, you know like in Vietnam'... I don't think that clarified the situation at all for these kids.   \n\nSome time later during a church soccer game this boy did a sliding tackle on me that left me sprawled in the dirt.  I think I understand the glint of satisfaction in his eyes that I observed.  Perhaps my biggest FU of all was not simply explaining myself at the time but it was super awkward.", "summary": "Black kid heard me say 'gorilla tactics' when what I meant was 'guerilla tactics'.  And I didn't clarify the statement to stop them thinking I'm racist."}
{"id": "t3_iahj9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the worst thing you have done to a significant other?", "post": "In High School, I had a lady friend over late at my house on a school night. We were up chatting and having sexytimes, until about 6 in da monin. I didn't realize it was so late, until I heard my parents door open down the hall. Freaking the fuck out, I told her to get in the closet, and hide for a bit until they left for work. I laid back down to act like I was sleeping, knowing my dad came in my room to check his email every morning. This is where it all went horribly wrong.. 3 hours later, I was awoken by an utterly horrified girl, crying an screaming at me. When I laid down, apparently, I had immediately passed out. Once she calmed down, she told me that my dad came in, and she stopped breathing for about 10 mins. My closet was also pretty damn dirty, so if she moved, it would have knocked something over.\n\nLater that night, my mom came home and asked me what my girlfriends shoes were doing at the front door when they left. Like a boss, I replied, she accidentally left them here. She has inside and outside shoes. My mom bought it, never underestimate the power of denial.\n\nI have more, that was the best one though.. Tell me yours..", "summary": "In High School, I made my girlfriend hide in the closet, so my parents wouldn't catch us having sexytimes."}
{"id": "t3_13p6ii", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "how do I [f22] deal with an SO [m21]'s disabled parent over a Christmas visit?", "post": "Boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half, and I have agreed to do Christmas With Boyfriend's Family. However, his mother has advanced MS and has recently been through a few surgeries, and obviously has ongoing serious medical issues. She is also very depressed and difficult to be around--this summer I visited for a week, and by the end I was going crazy. She's a very strong woman, and has compensated for not being able to do a lot of things by telling other people what they should do, which gets trying very quickly. This is made worse by the fact that I'm in med school, and so she wants to confide in me all the problems she's having with all her doctors and complain about the care she's received. (This is a trait which has already alienated many friends and family members who live near her.) We're staying in the house with them and there is really no space for me to get away from the situation or have time to myself. Last christmas, she and the bf got into a fight about the very same \"telling people what to do\" issue, which ended up giving her a severe flare-up that put her in the hospital for four days during and after Christmas. Boyfriend feels guilty about this and really wants this Christmas to be better, and I'm just feeling a lot of dread.\n\nReddit, I want to be a good person and be kind, but I also don't want my christmas (the only break I get in the middle of a really killer med school year year) to be totally filled with medical problems and family drama in a family that isn't mine.", "summary": "How do I treat an SO's disabled, depressed mother with compassion, but also not hate this Christmas or end my relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_3ps6kb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] with my GF [22F] of 11 months, just ended things.", "post": "It was a rocky relationship but at least we love each other. We overcame every obstacle, but i guess with each passing problem, she got more and more worn down. \n\nWe're both young, not yet done living early 20's life, but we talked plenty of settling down, even started living together. We broke up last night, but i dont know if there's still room for reconciliation. I just dont know if i should still be chasing her. I still love her, and i dont really plan on moving on--if it happens, it happens, if it doesnt i'll just deal with it? I just seem to have forgotten what life was like before having someone there.", "summary": "Sorry for the rambling, What are some things that newly single people do, what should i do, i'm just kinda lost."}
{"id": "t3_2e7tad", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/m] A really good friend (17/f) made a move on me...", "post": "Ok, so I am a bit younger, I hope you don't mind.\n\nI am currently 20 and will start Uni in Germany this fall and I have the first time a real problem with a relationship. I always had a really good friend and she helped me all the time with everything, we know each others since early childhood. She is 2 and a bit years younger than I am and she is really important for me, I can talk with her about anything. I am currently single and now she made a move on me and I am crashing. \n\nHer life is currently horrible, and while we both have it not easy, she is really breaking at the moment. This is hurting me, so I started to become sort of like a brother, whenever I see her I just want to protect her from everything bad in life, no matter what happens. I think she saw that as me approaching and just took the chance (she kissed me, nothing so serious). Now I panicked and friend zoned her. I told her I will think about it until Uni starts, but I don't want to friend zone her, because I know friend zone, it sucks! But whenever I see her, I think of the small child that I still remember, not the girl she is right now (she is 17, it is not like I am committing a crime, am I?) What should I do now? I mean I like her, and we understand each other well, and we know everything about the other one, it would be so relaxed with her...", "summary": "A girl made a move on me and I still see her as a very good childhood friend. Should I let her go or is there a way in which it will change?"}
{"id": "t3_4qb5te", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with a guy [25M] I've been talking to less than a month, is it bad to \"ghost\"?", "post": "Hi everyone. Thanks for reading!\n\nI've been on one date with this guy and he was fun to hang out with. Previous to the date, I told him I wanted to take anything physical very slowly. He seemed understanding, and I reiterated this again after the date. A few days later, he tried sexting with me, which made me uncomfortable especially since I had just told him I really wasn't interested in anything physical yet, and I find it presumptuous of him to assume that I will have sex with him at all, given we have only hung out once. I also found it kind of disrespectful, since I hadn't been unclear about my opinions on that.\n\nMy question is, can I just like...stop talking to him completely? I haven't answered his texts since that conversation. Can I just keep doing that, or should I explain myself.", "summary": "can I just completely stop talking to a guy who I've only been talking to for less than a month or is that rude?"}
{"id": "t3_q9izn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Agonising back pain, could use some advice. Have you had a herniated disc? know anything about it? I'm at the end of my tether.", "post": "There's something wrong with my back. Very very very wrong. I had an MRI about four years agothat showed the first signs of a herniated disc. Every few months or so i get a flare up of pain that puts me on my arse for two or three days. About a month ago i had one of these flare ups and it hasn't gone away. for a whole month. Pain doesn't describe it properly. Finger curling, screaming agony comes close.\n\nI can't stand up, i can barely walk. Sitting down hurts, standing up hurts, lying down hurts. I went to a doctor yesterday who flipped and said I need to get an MRI immediately. She wouldn't even let me walk out of the surgery and called a taxi. She faxed a referral to a neurosurgeon and said to wait for his call. I waited 24 hours. Today i found out he may not be able to think about when i can get an appointment for another four days. \n\nSo now i'm waiting in limbo and i don't know what to do. Should i be resting? stretching? walking? what makes it worse? what makes it better? I'm starting to get depressed. I cry at the drop of a hat, i feel lost and powerless. I normally work full time, study part time and take every chance i can to get outdoors in the garden or do something active. I feel like i'm becoming paralysed in body and mind and i don't know what to do. \n\nThe Doctor mentioned that there's a possibility this could be a condition where the nerves in the spinal column get strangled somehow. I can't remember the name for it because i was a bit in shock. Has anyone out there heard of this? Has anyone out there been through something similar to this? have any advice for me?", "summary": "herniated disk or some sort of spinal column strangulation is causing me to lose my mind. Don't know what to do. Please help!"}
{"id": "t3_1u3uot", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (24/F) haven't spoken to my mother (50) in several years. Today she was diagnosed with lung cancer. Should I talk to her?", "post": "I live several states away. My aunt and brother are pressuring me to call my mother after she went to the hospital to have surgery for a callapsed lung and finds out she has lung cancer. \n\nBackground: My mother abandoned my brother and me repeatedly beginning when I was eight. We both have different fathers, neither of which were there to take care of us. We also had to deal with several of my mother's abusive boyfriends. We were very poor. Once my mother and I lived in a womens' shelter. I haven't lived with my her since I was 13. At this time she was in and out of jail and abusive men. My brother could barely pay rent for himself so my aunt reluctantly took care of me until I was 18 when she kicked me out. (I believe she blames me for her divorce as her husband did NOT want me to live with them.)\n\nI haven't really spoken to my aunt or my brother since moving from the state. I am friendly on Facebook, and I call my brother maybe two or three times a year. I even accepted my mother's FB request. I thought letting her view my pictures and such was a nice gesture, but she messages me often to talk although I have never replied. I'm beginning to think this was a mistake, because ever since my  brother won't stop telling me to call her.\n\nI am disturbed about the cancer as I would be disturbed by any person having cancer, but I'd rather not call. I fully expected to never talk to my mother again, but I'm afraid that if I don't my family won't forgive me. Even if I did call, what would I say? I have nothing to say.. I've invested years into not caring, and I feel there is no going back. My family won't understand this. \n\nSo do I call my mother to satisfy my family? Or is my refusal justified?", "summary": "My mother was a shitty mom, so I stopped talking to her years ago. Now she was cancer and I'm not sure what I should do."}
{"id": "t3_3mlp32", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 26 mwith my 26m friend of nearly 20 years. I can't make his bachelor party. Help.", "post": "So I feel obligated to put some context to this. I suffered chronic homesickness as a teenager. It meant I wouldn't stay at folks houses, I wouldn't visit friends at college and a whole host of other things. It took me a long time to get over it and every now and then I still have the odd lapse.\n\nThis means I developed a reputation as being a no-show. It was only recently I tried to explain it to some of my friends but I still have the reputation as not being reliable to show up. \n\nWith that said. I legitimately can't make my friends bachelor party. I work in sports and so weekends are my Monday-Friday. That weekend is a big derby, and I also have commitments to a column I write that needs me to watch games on the Saturday/Sunday. \n\nSo I need to tell him I can't do it and I'm trying to do it in a way that doesn't make it look like I'm just bailing out of not wanting to go. Truth is I'd actually love to go and every time I try to put the words together they sound cliche. I think in the bigger picture I'm also wrestling with some conflicted feelings. We've known each other 20 years. He hasn't always been present and there's months gone by where I don't hear from him or I reach out and he's busy. Some of those months I really needed him but I feel like that could be me just reaching for an excuse to justify a decision I know will upset him.", "summary": "History of 'bailing' due to homesickness and other issues. Now legitimately can't attend an important event and trying to work out how to tell a very old friend."}
{"id": "t3_38fqn3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (23m) fianc\u00e9e (23f) wears same clothes regardless of the event", "post": "My fianc\u00e9e and I have been engaged for a few months and dating for the past 3 years.  We graduated college in December (a semester early).  She's in grad school and I'm working at a bank.\n\nShe has always dressed casually, loose T-shirts and jeans for every occasion.  She has one very worn button down shirt for occasions.  She's worn it to weddings, company parties, and other events where she is very underdressed.  It's a bit embarrassing at times, especially since I've seen my coworkers and relatives snickering about her.\n\nI've offered to buy her clothes and take her shopping, but she says no.  I don't know the slightest thing about women's clothes or I would've surprised her with a dress or something.  I'm not asking her to be a fashionista, just to dress appropriately.\n\nShe's joked about getting married in the button down and I'm half afraid she isn't joking.  When I talk to her about it, she insists its not a problem and that people are superficial.  She also says that no one would look at her either way.\n\nAnything I can do?", "summary": "fianc\u00e9e is always underdressed and wears the same shirt to any 'formal' occasion.  I've never seen her in a skirt or blouse, let alone a nice dress."}
{"id": "t3_1b400p", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Should I(23) keep pursuing her(21)?", "post": "Okay so, me and two other girls are in a study group. We all known each other for about 1 month and a half now. So girl A and I studied by ourselves the previous week without girl B. I thought we had some good conversations when we were alone, making each other laugh and stuff. So i was gonna ask girl A out the next time we study together.\n\nSo two days ago, Girl A said we should all meet up to study. Then yesterday when we were suppose to meet, Girl B started a group text and said she couldn't make it. Then all of a sudden Girl A said she had a doctors appointment later in the afternoon at 4:30 and couldn't make it. Our original study time was at 12 and she doesnt live that far away. We usually study for like an hour and a half so i didnt see why girl A couldnt make it, besides thinking maybe she wants to avoid being alone with me.\n\nSo should i keep pursuing or is this a sign saying she is not interested?", "summary": "girl sets up study group time, after one girl says she can't make it, she says she has a doctors appointment and can't make it as well."}
{"id": "t3_1tv8v6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [F/18] family dislikes my boyfriend [18] of a year for no reason, pressure I can't control is bothering me", "post": "I have been dating my boyfriend, who also happens to be my best friend since highschool for a year now, and honestly he is one of the best guys I've liked. Going through the highschool phase of liking attractive guys or douchebags was tough, but I honestly have found someone who is smart, puts his family first, and has good life goals ahead of him. I am Asian, with decent grades, and average looks. I am an only child, and when my parents look at me, they see a world of possibilities. I am very family orientated, my family always comes first along with my faith. However, my parents expect my boyfriend to be stellar and amazing. \n\nHe's either not good looking enough, not smart enough (which I disagree with), not out going enough, and as you can guess the list goes on. My boyfriend has been nothing but supportive, kind hearted to everyone, he grew up in similar conditions which led to similar values, and he can read me like a book, which most to all of my friends cannot. We started university this year, and it was hard for everyone-not just us. Grades was something he could always count on, and this semester it just wasn't there, for me as well it was a tough semester. Then for Christmas, he gave me a rather bad present, and to my parents it seemed like an insult. This was the last straw for them, and all hell broke loose. \n\nI know we're young, and this may not last but he has been a driving force in getting me through everything. Our relationship gives me hope, but my parents are telling me he's not someone I can end up with later in life. I'm not ready to talk about ending up with someone, but they never gave him a chance. Only had dinner with him once, and judged him solely based on his looks, and him being nervous for dinner. \n\nSo tonight I stood up for my boyfriend, and fought with my parents. Am I in the wrong, or should I keep fighting for him, or I mean should I altogether give up on convincing my parents?", "summary": "Family dislikes boyfriend for minor reasons that should not matter, should I keep fighting for him or should I stop letting my family dominate my life."}
{"id": "t3_gl72n", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddettes: Reverse Friend Zoning?", "post": "Question for Female (and possibly Male) redditors who have been in this situation.\n\nAbout a month ago, i expressed interest in a girl, who for a few days, expressed some what mixed feelings back to me. in the end, she friend-zoned me; and i have grown to be really close friends with her. \n\nup until recently, i have been making small advances on her. nothing that fully stepped out of the friend zone, but close enough to the line that i was hoping it would've made her think. \n\nwithin the past few days, i cam to two realizations.\n1) small advances were getting me no where \nand\n2) if i tried to be more forward, i would complicate and possibly diminish a friendship that means a lot to me.\n\nso i have decided, that in lieu of pushing a relationship and possibly losing a great friend, i will listen to some solid advice\n\n\"do unto others as you would have had done unto yourself\"\n\nI have started to put her in the friend zone, which is completely fine by me if all we are is friends, but how will she feel about this change in our friendship? will it cause her to rethink her initial choice of putting me here, or will we be no more then friends forever.", "summary": "what happens when you've been friend zoned, and stop trying to break out of it. how does a girl reacted to being friend-zoned back?"}
{"id": "t3_36sr2e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] Approaching cute cashier/barista (no relationship but potential crush)", "post": "So I frequent the Dunkin Donuts near my house and recently have been being served by a particular employee. Had a brief chat today with her about brain farts and the really chilly weather outside. Ordered my coffee and another one for a family member. When I headed over to the pickup side of the counter she asked if the iced coffee was for me (it was). When I said yes she immediately got a size larger and remarked that she was giving it to me for free. Then she stopped me before I walked out and gave me a free coupon for next time. \n\nShe's always been super friendly when I order but never to this extent. How do I non-creepily go about testing the waters. I've always had this mental \"block\" towards hitting on cashiers. It just doesn't seem like good practice and could easily come across as being on the weird/stalker side of things. \n\nI realize that she may in fact have just been trying to keep up customer loyalty but there was definitely a flirty hint in the manner that she did all of this. \n\nHave you folks had situations like this? If so how did you approach it and what was the result?", "summary": "Dunkin Donuts employee going out of her way to give me free products/be flirty. Not sure how to proceed!"}
{"id": "t3_p3z0v", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Advice for overcoming a few last vices?", "post": "r/loseit buddies,\n\nLast May I started working on losing weight. At the time I was 350lb 5'11\" dude. After starting a simple diet and exercise regiment I was a 290lb 5'11\" dude by September. Unfortunately, that September I also started a second job that, in addition to school, significantly cut into my leisure and exercise time and added significantly to my stress levels. \n\nAt this point I stopped losing weight and my diet began to slip. I developed, on the worst days, a two pint a day Rocky Road habit and a fondness for Kit-Kat bars. Since September I've made multiple attempts at restarting weight loss but have never made it more than a couple weeks without a Blue Bell and Kit-Kat relapse, sometimes even a Kit-Kat in Blue Bell relapse. These go on until I start to gross myself out and try to restart losing. So my question for other loseiters is this: if you ever hit a roadblock like this how did you overcome it and get back on track? Cold turkey seems to end in relapse, gradually stepping down ends in relapse, incorporating reasonable portions into calorie counting ends in unreasonable portions. I want to recapture the magic of my serious losing months but am stymied at every turn. Any help would be appreciated.", "summary": "Oh God how can I escape the wafery, almondy, marshmallowy hellhole  of rocky road addiction and get back on the righteous path?"}
{"id": "t3_f6z2y", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Unintended positive consequence: When counting calories, I actually eat more than \"blind dieting\" but still lose weight", "post": "In the past, I have easily lost 10-20 pounds for a while, but it seemed overly difficult to restrict my consumption. It's like a month of constant trial.\n\nSo a couple weeks ago, I put myself on a plan that involved 2000 calories per day. I track food with one of the dozens of iPhone apps out there. \n\nThe awesome thing is, 2000 calories per day is actually a satisfying amount of food! I think when I did the \"just eat less\" thing, it turned into something like \"eat 1200 calories a day, feel starving.\" So of course every 2 hours was challenging, because I'd feel like I was overly hungry and have to fight some urge to eat. And this sort of caloric deficit didn't leave enough juice for my brain to run on. I program for a living. Lightheadedness is a death knell to my productivity.\n\nThese past couple of weeks, by the time dinner comes around, I usually have 800+ calories of eating-budget left to burn. This means I can have a satisfying dinner and be fine for the rest of the night.", "summary": "Count calories, and find out that you can actually eat more and be more satisfied than blindly eating less. You have to measure something in order to have the data to improve it."}
{"id": "t3_4r61xn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21M] think I'm a bad, egocentric, narcissistic, person, but my friends and family think I'm a great person. I feel angry towards them", "post": "Throwaway because some people know my account. I'm nice and loyal to others and I really enjoy the company of others but my thoughts are completely different than what I do, say and what people think of me. People think I'm loyal to everyone (based on that I've helped friends out through tough times and that I've been a good person to them), but believe me I'd ditch my friends if I got 'better'. People think I'd be nice and friendly to everyone (based on selfless things that I've done), but in my mind I wouldnt mind stepping on others to get higher up, and in my mind I help others to egoistically feel better about myself. People think I'm a very strong guy mentally because I've faced - long story short - addictions, bullies, my illness and deaths of others close to me, and even though I'm over it all I still think I'm weak and I want to give into my addictions every day. The compliments I get from the people who know me, sometimes better than I know myself, are - objectively seen - extremely nice... but I feel like I don't deserve it and I'm angry at them for not seeing the thoughts behind it and seeing how I feel. Most of the times I want to shout at them for it, but I don't. I know objectively I'm a great guy. But I feel all alone in the thoughts I have, and I've talked to others about it and then I only get compliments on how 'humble' I am. Fuck that. I feel like I want someone to hate me at those parts where I hate myself, because that feels more valid.", "summary": "I'm angry and alone when people say I'm a good guy, because in my thoughts behind my good actions I'm a bad guy."}
{"id": "t3_3hdyv9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Mother [62/f] wants to relocate out-of-state with her half-brother [55?/m] who she recently learned has a mean streak on Facebook", "post": "My mother has been getting to know her half-brother (HB) for a couple years. I've met him a few times and he seems like a nice guy. She's looking to retire (HB's already retired) and they've talked about getting a place together out-of-state where cost of living is more affordable. It even sounds like HB is offering to be more than fair with how he's willing to divide expenses. Seemed consistent with my impression of him.\n\nThe issue is that my mom recently discovered another side to HB on Facebook. HB is from rural PA and we know he's conservative (not an issue for her; she avoids talking politics), but on Facebook he frequently comments on posts from right-wing clickbait sites (Conservative Tribune seems to be his favorite). HB's comments are typical \"bitter-angry-oppressed-white-guy\" stuff, but he's expressed some pretty ugly opinions about different groups (mainly blacks, illegal immigrants, gays and sometimes muslims).\n\nMy mom's distressed to see HB has this mean streak, and thinks this way about ANY of these groups, but especially because we have a gay family member (whom HB knows about and seems fine with?!). Not only does she feel it may not be possible to live with HB because of this, she also feels a need to confront HB about his attitudes towards gays because she doesn't want to betray our gay family member.\n\nMy advice to her at the moment is to talk to him about the gay issue, instead of confronting his entire worldview. HB's opposition to marriage equality seems to be the zero-sum fallacy that gay marriage devalues \"traditional\" marriage / reduces others' religious freedom. Thankfully, he doesn't seem to quote Leviticus or hurl epithets, so I hope there is the possibility to reach an understanding.", "summary": "Mom isn't sure she can live with her half-brother who opposes (among other things) marriage equality/gay rights, without betraying our gay family member."}
{"id": "t3_4aomvs", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [18/m] and I have gone out on 5 dates with a girl the same age as me. Should I keep seeing her even though I don't love her?", "post": "I'm a 18 year old man and I've been seeing this one girl (18 y.o.) for about two months now and I've gone on 5 dates with her. We've had a lot of fun and I've enjoyed my time with her. We have kissed quite a bit too, which is awesome considering I'm a virgin. \n\nThe thing I'm having trouble is whether or not its \"right\" to keep seeing her even though I'm not in love with her? Soon, in about 4 months or so, both of us will leave for college and I'm 90 percent sure that we will not go to the same university. I'm attracted to her physically (I would very much like to have sex with her) but I don't think I \"LOVE\" her, if you know what I mean. Sure, she is pretty and she makes me horny af, but I don't think I will end up marrying her or anything. \n\nIs it right to keep seeing this girl for hopefully a couple more months before we both leave for college? It would be fucking awesome to have a girlfriend during the summer because we could just fool around every day while our parents are at work. That would be fucking awesome; however, would this be the right thing to do? \n\nI don't want to be mean to her or anything. I know how much it sucks getting dumped when you get your hopes up for someone... :/ \n\nPlease help me out. I'm so fucking confused.", "summary": "I'm young and horny. Should I keep dating a girl in hopes of getting laid even though I dontt \"love\" her?"}
{"id": "t3_4uyzzf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25f] BF [25m] of 2 months is way less flirty with me than he was when we first met", "post": "I've been in a relationship with this new guy for 2 months and at first things were spectacular--we were hanging out constantly, sending each other cute texts all day, and all over each other when we were together.\n\nAfter about 3 weeks, I noticed a sharp decline. He now takes hours to text me back, is quite a lot less flirty with me, and isn't as motivated to hang out with me. All the cute kissy face emojis are gone. It's kind of a huge red flag for me, as it just dropped off so fast!\n\nTo make matters worse, he accidentally showed me some pictures on his phone of his ex. There were so many of them! But he ended up breaking up with her within 3 months and from the way he explained it, she got mad at him for not wanting to spend as much time with him. Makes me wonder if he and I are going down the exact same road--him getting super excited and all over me, then dropping off, until eventually things are no longer working. \n\nWhat do you guys think? Is this normal behavior or should I be concerned?", "summary": "boyfriend of two months is significantly less flirty / all over me as he was when we first started dating and it really bugs me."}
{"id": "t3_11fvr8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I wrong to get mad?", "post": "I (17/f) have been dating my SO (19/m) since the last 3 years. He's a great guy, always there for me and very supportive. Things were going extremely well in our relationship and we esteemed ourselves because we were better off than the rest of the couples around us. Our relationship was perfect! Until his best friend walked in. Let's call her Amy. So Amy and my SO used to hate each other back in high school. One day she accidentally sent him a message, and the both of them started talking and wouldnt stop! They would talk till 4 am, go out for movies blah blah blah. I was fine with it, really. I was indifferent to Amy. \nAlso I should mention that I really hate threesomes because they make me insecure like hell and I made that very clear to my boyfriend. Yet he \"joked\" that he'd want to have a threesome with Amy. I obviously had a problem with this and I lashed out at him, and he knew this made me upset and begged for forgiveness and promised that he'd never say anything like that ever again. I should probably mention that Amy is really hot. \nThere was a time when he became all dismissive me, and became closer to Amy. He realized it was wrong though. \nOne day my boyfriend told me that he digs OAG's. He also told me that making me jealous is a huge turn on for him. I jokingly asked him to make me jealous and he said that Amy called him sexy and said she'd love to have a threesome with him and her crush. I felt nauseated and decided to shut up because I didn't want another fight. And also because he calls me over-sensitive. Our relationship has been going downhill ever since Amy entered his life but he refuses to acknowledge it. Am I being a clingy or am I right to be mad?", "summary": "relationship's going downhill ever since female friend walked into SO's life. He refuses to acknowledge it. Should I tell him it's wrong or am I just insecure?"}
{"id": "t3_1ak536", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What are some services that aren't offered that you wish were?", "post": "I have kind of a unique dilemma that a service, in my opinion, a lot of people would use, would solve. I wish I could buy subscriptions to specific television channels and stream them on my smart television via an application or stream on a computer or mobile device. This is why...I live on Indiana University's property. They have the most shit standard definition cable ever and it blows. It only has very basic channels. When I asked if I was allowed a cable box, I was told that in the rules and regulations that it clearly states that anything of the sort would be considered a violation of the other tenants' rights to health and safety. Consequently I have to buy each episode of The Walking Dead on Amazon Instant when it becomes available the next day and will have to soon for Game of Thrones. Some say we should pirate them. That would work if their internet security system wasn't so thorough. It tells me when my Java is out of date...I'm pretty sure they could catch me stealing and do something irritating to us school-wise.", "summary": "I go to a university and would like to be able to just subscribe to AMC and HBO since I'm not allowed to have a cable box or any television service besides their's."}
{"id": "t3_20b9m5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (24F) not happy in this town, SO (28M) is. Been together for 6 years, have 2 young children.", "post": "Basically, I hate the town we live in for many reasons. Some I know are petty but some I feel are legitimate. I can't seem to make friends here as hard as I try, I can't find work and I feel very isolated a lot of the time.\n\n Jacob (my SO) has good work here and very recently got a promotion. He has a steady job he loves and he loves it here. He is from this town and I'm from another town a few states away. We met in my town, fell in love and lived there for a while. Work wasn't as easily available for him and the cost of living there is much more expensive than it is here so we left after 2 years. We've now lived here for 2 years and I'm just not happy. I had friends, a steady job and family in my old town. Here I can't find work because its mainly hospitality and Jacob works days and nights so its not feasible to work around his hours. We have 2 children that I can't get into daycare because they're all full, so even regular Mon-Fri work is out. I've tried play groups, local parks, clubs, local events and markets in an attempt to make some friends but this is a very big retirement town and any other mothers here are in their 30's and people closer to my age don't have kids and I can't seem to connect with anyone. \n\nHis family live here and none of us really get along. Were both polite to them and will always help out of we can or are needed, but we don't see them often. My family live 2 hours away and they have accepted Jacob as part of the family completely but that's not really relevant, just trying to demonstrate that my closest support system is 2 hours away. \n\nI had friends in my old town who I maintain contact with, I feel like I had more of a life. I wasn't just a mother or a partner. I was a person.", "summary": "Essentially he's happier here, he has a steady job he loves. I'm very unhappy here and miss my old town. We can't seem to find a compromise that either of us are happy with."}
{"id": "t3_3w4xaq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me bisexual [17M] looking for dating/hook up advice [dating romantic and non-romantanic]", "post": "I only know how to ask people out and all I get is no!\nI know am not ulgy, dumb, or unattractive in general, but no one wants to go out with me! \n\nI can hold a conversion and in my opinion am very good in the sack!!!!\nI've only had three girlfriend's all ending because I eventually lose contact with them (relationship ending on a good note in way!)!\n\nI've never been with a guy. I know that am emotionally attracted to them but I don't know if am sexually. That is a huge problem not knowing because if I get into a relationship and I am not sexually attracted to my partner then what's the point of being in that romantic relationship? If there was a just to sleep with a guy without starting a relationship?", "summary": "I THINK I AM BISEXUAL AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO CONFIRM IT WITHOUT STARTING A RELATIONSHIP! AS WELL HOW DO I HOOK UP WITHOUT ASKING PEOPLE OUT STEP?"}
{"id": "t3_2wunez", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with my exgirlfriend [25F] 10months finished with me because I was verbally abusive to her in depression.", "post": "A lot of things happened with us. Both have bad pasts but mostly I was dealing with a big illness (bad Gerd) that made me bitter about a million things. She was the kindest most giving person ever but so much that I though she'd always be there despite my outbursts. Would give anything to have her back, but I do just want her happy.\n\nI've started working on myself, fitness, quit drinking and smoking and started my own business.\n\nI made her feel worthless in the relationship and i spent 2-3 weeks after the breakup letting her know how much she was worth to me. We broke up before after my grandads funeral, instantly regretted it and then chased her for a week and we were back together. We never properly reconciled though because we missed eachother so much.\n\nShe won't get into any talks but we run a charity together. The one day we had to.meet at an event, and we we acted like we used to at the beginning, it was amazing. After we left eachother she was texting me jokingly and that was great too. Times gone on and as i try to sort things out she she just keeps saying she wasn't good enough, how she was no good for me and I need to change for me etc. I say how great she was and she tells me.I'm doing so well (because of what I'm doing with my life now). I ask if she's okay and she says she's getting there. I ask her if she's sure and she says \"I'm Ok.. Just Concentrate on being you.\" we then both said good night. When I've suggested we can't be friends because I'm only interested in her romantically she's kicked off in aggression so surely some feelings are still playing about?\n\nIs there any, any chance at all to get this back? She really is amazing and I can't see myself ever getting over how badly i treated her, especially as we run a charity committee together.", "summary": "Exgf broke up with me because I treated her vadly. Want her back And need to know if there's a chance."}
{"id": "t3_2akzci", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my now ex-BF [18 M], broke up because of misgivings about LDRs", "post": "Throwaway account due to intense activity on original one, and the title is misleading - I'm the 18 year old (girl), he's the 23 year old guy.\n\nEx-BF went to the same college I am going to this fall; we met at an alumni event last November. Cue the strong feelings and falling for each other bit, but with a catch: ex already had a long distance relationship. Deciding it was unfair to the other girl, he broke it off, and we had a couple of great months.\n\nA bit of background: ex had a two-year long relationship with said girl. He was- and still is, to a certain extent - depressed at the fact that the relationship didn't work out simply because of distance, which led him to stop having feelings for the girl entirely. \n\nWe were happy, but ex decided to break it off yesterday. He pointed out how although he liked me, we would be thousands of miles away from each other for four years. Job prospects in his field in the area I would be in would be dismal at best in the foreseeable future, and I had no interest in ever coming back to our city. He was also emotionally unprepared for another long distance relationship, pointing out how we had extremely different political views, and that it would get harder and harder for us to even coexist with such radically different lines of thought.\n\nI asked him then why he initiated anything in the first place, and he replied something along the lines about how he was \"too youthful\" about the whole thing. I asked if I was just an easy lay, or a rebound. He said no.\n\n*Then what am I?* I asked.\n\nHe didn't reply, only asking for me to give him space.\n\nReddit, I am still reeling from all this. I too had misgivings about the relationship in the first place, and I only decided to commit because he told me that it was worth it, that we would make it. He is not replying to any of my texts. I am completely devastated.", "summary": "18 year old girl has strong feelings for 23 year old guy. 23 year old guy dumps girl because he can't deal with an LDR. Girl is heartbroken, and is seeking advice."}
{"id": "t3_3tzxtb", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Update][TX] Lube shop forgot to put my oil cap back on and I didn't find out until it was too late.", "post": "Link to the original, I took the advice of the comment that said to try and resolve through the insurance companies.\n\nI'm standing here in the parking lot of the repair shop who's been housing my Vitara while I had the insurance situation sorted...\n\nMy insurance said to contact the insurance of the establishment, turns out they didn't have insurance. My insurance instructed is to sit tight and a claims adjuster would contact us... Turns out that was not supposed to be the case. \n\nSo, since they told us there was nothing we could do, we'd try to put some oil in and start it with a new cap.\n\nIt was at this point, the guy at the repair shop noticed that oil was coming from the filter, and that the lube shop who originally did the oil change, used the incorrect filter.\n\nSo,", "summary": "Lube shop forgets my oil cap, and uses incorrect filter during oil change, And I drive the car until it suddenly dies."}
{"id": "t3_lnq7r", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Sprint Tethering Options", "post": "I'm going on a long driving trip (10 hours) with a friend in the next few weeks and I'm trying to find a way for me to use the 3G connection on my phone to get internet access on my laptop. (and any internet is good internet when your stuck in a car for 10 hours)\n\nPreviously I had a Palm Pre+ with Verizon and with that came a free wireless hotspot service that was pretty sweet. Sadly I don't have that on my Motorol Photon from Sprint. \n\nAfter doing some digging I realized that the closest option I have is to pay the $40s for a hotspot plan from sprint. I honestly remember that plan only being $5 too, which is the weird thing. Obviously when I called the customer support people about it they didn't have any idea what I was talking about. \n\nNow I know that I could root my phone and probably get an app that will do exactly what I'm looking for, but I'm trying to avoid rooting my phone at all costs.", "summary": "I can haz internets via my phone? What are my options? Am I crazy, or did Sprint have a $5 internet option at some point?"}
{"id": "t3_v738z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Screwed up with boss... what should I do?", "post": "I'm 20 f, my boss is around 50 years old, also f.\n\nSo I have two jobs, and the schedules for both jobs are made on a\nweekly basis. One of my jobs I have had for three years, the other one I have had for a month and a bit. I forgot to give my schedule from one job to my boss at my other job, and so I was not scheduled for this week. I didn't realize why I had not been put on the schedule until now.\n\nMy question is, since I royally screwed up, what can I do to redeem myself? I don't want to call my boss today because it is a Sunday and she has the day off. Mistakes aren't easily forgiven where I work, as far as I can tell, and the boss often makes comments about how the employees should be scared of her. I have screwed up at previous jobs (little things) but my boss was less intimidating than my current one, so I am not sure how to handle this situation.", "summary": "screwed up at work by not giving the boss my schedule from my other job, am not scheduled this week, what should I say in order to apologize to my (scary/intimidating) boss?"}
{"id": "t3_33j8sc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [27F] ex bestfriend [26M] of 9 years is outside my work. Help!", "post": "We had a fallen out and I haven't seen him in 2 months. Basically he had a problem with meth use, he became pyschotic and I've had enough of it. He also didn't like that I became great friends with his ex (they're gay). Long story short, now he wants to patch things up. I still think he's using but he wont admit. He thinks we can go back to normal right away.. That's why he's outside my work place and asking me to come out to say hi. I want a formal sit down and talk first. What do I say to him that won't hurt his feelings, but get the point straight that I'm fucking serious and I still don't believe him?", "summary": "Ex-friend is outside my work, we had a fallen out... I don't want to see him without hurting his feelings."}
{"id": "t3_2it88d", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Medical bill was in collections for two years, found out about it last month and paid half off, now my parents are telling me not to pay anymore until they contact the insurance company we had because it should have been covered.", "post": "Okay so, in January 2012, I ended up in the ER two days in a row while my entire family was at Disney World. Fast forward a few months, I recall the bill coming to my parents' house, and receiving it when I came home from college at some point. My parents have never been very good with money. Countless months with our water, power, phones shut off. Last year, the bank took our house. It wouldn't be far fetched to imagine a situation in which my parents conveniently misplaced this bill.\n\nBeing the naive 19 year old that I was at the time, I assumed my parents would take care of it. As I've come to learn being a much more responsible and **slightly** less naive 22 year old, my parents let the two medical bills (totaling $1700) go to collections. I found this out when I checked my credit for the first time (suggested by a finance professor) around the beginning of last month.\n\nI talked to the collection agency, which is based in the city that I live in, and as suggested by my own mother I set up a payment plan. I have already paid ~$700 of this debt. As of yesterday, I get a call from my mother who urges me not to pay any more money because I had insurance at the time and it should have been covered. Now, my father is attempting to contact his former employer to process an old bill.\n\nMy question is: If by some miracle this does happen to work out, what is the likelihood that I would be able to get the money back that I have already paid?\n\nOh and, like an idiot, I was intimidated when they already had all of my information, and gave them authorization to withdraw the money from my account.", "summary": "If the insurance company processes a two year old claim, is there a chance that I could get the money back that I paid to a collection company for the debt?"}
{"id": "t3_cmgp9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I drunkenly made out with a girl, and now she wants to go on a date - how do i decline politely?", "post": "A week ago, I was at a giant(think >100,000 people) festival, and I was drunk. I met a chick, who actually didn't seem very in to me, but I was kinda horny, and proceeded to make out with her - bear in mind we are both drunk at this point. \n\nAt some point we are separated, and I didn't think much about it until today, where she out of the blue messages me on facebook. I have no idea how she got my info, i gave her only my first name, but whatever - I've facebook-stalked people before, too.\n\nIn her message, she basically says that she is really embarassed that she's doing this, but i've been stuck in her head since we met, and she really wants to see me again. She is very apologetic, and her message sounds kinda insecure. \n\nThe thing is.. I don't really want a date with this girl. Two days after we kissed, I met a super awesome chick, that I could see leading somewhere. And besides that, she's not really my type. I think it is really awesome that she worked up the courage to message me, and I really want to leave her with something more than \"Sorry I don't want to see you, have a nice life\". \n\nSo Reddit - how do i decline her, without her feeling like an ass for messaging me?", "summary": "Kissed a girl, she sounds insecure when she messages me, how do I decline without her feeling like a fool."}
{"id": "t3_rl9dn", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Looking for suggestions: Neighborhood dog left out constantly, seems lethargic/unwell, possible abrasions", "post": "Hope I'm posting in the right place. There's a yard on my street I walk by every day on my way to class. Inside there's a pitbull-mix looking dog. It's a small yard, all cement. The dog is outside every day on my way to/from class and to/from the gym, and most of the rest of the time it seems. I live in North Philadelphia, not the nicest place, so I don't hang around the fence but every day as I pass, the dog is laying either on the pavement (Next to about 10 piles of it's droppings) or in this wooden shack looking dog house. Today the dog was sitting right along the fence. It's face was just droopy and miserable, it's eyes were blood red, and it seemed to have an abrasion/patch of fur missing on it's side/front leg. The last time I was this close to the dog, it barked at me. Today, it just stared blankly. I've been wondering what I can/should do all semester. Is there someone I can/should call? Should I mind my own business? In any other situation I'd have ZERO problem confronting someone about a case such as this (I'm a pretty decent sized guy) but as I said, I don't live in a great area and many of the locals here don't take kindly to students as it is. I've volunteered with PAWS (Philadelphia Animal Welfare Society) before so I imagine I might wanna start there.", "summary": "pitbull left outside constantly. Looks weak, unhealthy, and possibly injured. Need suggestions, but don't want to get shot."}
{"id": "t3_37c0dd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [23 M/F] considering breaking up with my Girlfriend [21 M/F] of 4 years", "post": "A couple years ago, my girlfriend broke up with me twice in once year.  At the time I was madly in love with her and was not confident enough to think I would be able to be with anyone who was as attractive or compatible.  During that period of the two break ups she cheated on me and told me about it years later because of guilt.  \n\nFast forward to now, I have definitely evolved as a person.  I am more confident and it has captured the attention of a lot of attractive girls.  Every time I go out with my friends and get the attention of a girl, I think to myself, \"maybe I'm entitled to this.\"  Of course, I respect my girlfriend too much to act on those desires.  \n\nYesterday I tried breaking up with her by bringing up some excuse about a potential possibility of a long distance relationship.  The conversation we had made me think about how long we've been together, how much I really like her, how committed she's been since then and how special what we have is.  \n\nEvery time I think about her cheating on me I get upset, every time a girl asks if I want to walk her home after a night of drinking I have second thoughts.  I wish there was some way to say, \"hey you had your fun, I want mine and then we can get back together,\" but I know that is not realistic. \n\nI really do care about this girl and can see myself with her in the long run, but also wish I could have my time to do me.  Maybe its selfish, but that is honestly how I feel.  Advice or thoughts?", "summary": "My gf cheated on me years ago, I wish I had that opportunity.  Want to have my cake and eat it too."}
{"id": "t3_1l6g14", "subreddit": "running", "title": "A realistic training programme?", "post": "Hi guys. I have a question for you but first, some background.\n\nI have a chronic pain condition so sometimes my ability to train can be affected. However, I'm fed up of being what I consider 'slow' as I know if I knew how to train, I could take a lot off my times.\n\nSo, as my club's season ends soon (end of October) I've set targets for next year:\n\n**5k** - Target: 00:20:00 - Current race PB: 00:24:28\n\n**5 mile** - Target: 00:33:06 - Not raced before\n\n**10k** - Target: 00:41:41 - Current race PB: 00:51:13\n\n**10 mile** - Target: 01:09:02 - Not raced before\n\n**Half** - Target: 01:32:00 - Current Race PB: 02:02:47\n\n**Marathon** - Target: 03:11:49 - Not raced before\n\nAre these targets realistic for 12 months time? Also, does anyone have recommendations for a training plan that I could follow that has a lot of focus on flexibility but could still achieve these times?", "summary": "Guy needs to set targets - are they realistic and, if so, can you recommend a flexible plan to achieve them?"}
{"id": "t3_3vd3jf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By underestimating a woman", "post": "This happened a few days ago. I fight recreationally with the local american pit fighters in town i was scheduled to have an exhibition with a fellow fighter in the gym i train at to test if i am ready to have my first real matches we get in the cage and are circling each other for a bit and \"feeling\" each other for weak spots. After a bit he attempted to give me a right hook that i saw coming so i grabbed his arm spun behind and put in an elbow leading to a submission. Heres where it gets hairy...we shake hands and he steps out quickly. After being congratulated a bit more i step out too immediately i am approached by a super-hot blond chick who seemed really excited. I said hi (my 19 y/o hormones raging) and she starts babbling on about the fight. I just keep on smiling and nodding as she leaned in and put her hands on my waist. Then she whispers in my ear \"you embarrased my boyfriend in there\" and scorpion kicks me in the face knocking me out for in front of everyone.", "summary": "i fought a local guy in the gym i train in and won then got kicked in the face by his gf afterwards knocking me out"}
{"id": "t3_4zyyjq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by giving a bj", "post": "Hi guys. I'm a first time poster so I apologize if my formatting is off and must also state that this fuck up was from over a year ago but will be telling it as if it happened today. (Since it's just easier that way.)\n\nI'm a young girl that wear's braces. I also have to mention that I have a missing tooth on the top row of my teeth in back kinda, so the wire isn't like held down to anything since my tooth isn't there. Well I had popped my top wire on my braces and had to wait go see my orthodontist on Tuesday since it was the only day they would let me go see them and it was a Friday.\n\nWell my dickbag boyfriend at the time was very demanding/abusive, etc. and had demanded that I give him a blowjob. I was not comfortable with this since the wire of my braces had popped out and everything. Even though I had told him I would rather not he still insisted and I had ended up giving him a bj.\n\nFor some reason he had wanted me to change my pace. He then grabbed my head and made me speed up a bit. That's when it happened. The wire that had popped out of my braces had stabbed him through the dick. I felt the wire from my braces go through his dick. I had pulled it out of his dick and felt it as I pulled out. I realized I had stabbed his dick through like a veiny looking area. \n\nWe were panicking, and I was crying. I went to go get ice and towels and shit to help relieve him of his pain. I had suggested going to a hospital or something (because I mean like I stabbed his fucking dick.) but he decided against it (because I was a minor at the time and my parents, etc.) After a few hours he was fine.", "summary": "I accidentally stabbed my boyfriend, at the time, through the dick with my braces because he really wanted a blowjob. "}
{"id": "t3_hefz9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I turn off the commentary that plays constantly in my head?", "post": "I have recently become self aware to the fact that I have been commentating everything in my head. For example, if I have a conversation with someone, instead of listening to what they are saying, I analyze the social iteration. In my head will be nonstop questions that play louder than the actual discussion. \"Does she think I am an idiot?\"  \"Is he uncomfortable?\"  \"Does she think I am creepy for making eye contact?\" \"Does he know I am not really paying full attention?\" There are a million other questions like that.\n\nEven as I have become self-aware of this, I still can't stop it and focus. Its been a problem mostly when communicating with people, but has effected other areas of my life such as concentrating on a project at work.  Even now as I type this I can't really turn it off.\n\nI think its most troubling when having sex. Instead of getting into the zone, I am constantly thinking about all this other bullshit.  How she perceives me, how animalistic it feels, etc.  The best sex (and perhaps social interactions in general), have always been drunk.  Being drunk is the only time I can really get into the zone and turn of the internal dialogue.\n\nIs there anyone else experiencing this?  I'm sure everyone does to some extent but I feel other people have better control over it. I'm not sure if its just social anxiety disorder or what but\u2026.I'd really like to try to get a better handle over it.  What are some techniques I can practice to turn off the voice inside my head?", "summary": "I am looking for ways to turn the voice off inside my head so I can focus on the moment instead of analyzing it."}
{"id": "t3_42hy2m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 F] with my bf [17 M] of 3-4 months having a rough patch and my moms not helping", "post": "Hey everyone, I would post this to /r/girltalk but it's a dead subreddit. \n\nSo, I've been going out with my bf for about 3-4 months, and it's been pretty good until we hit a road bump. He's really busy with work, school (grad year for him), and sports. Sometimes we don't get to hang during the week, but we see each other at school. \n\nHere's the main problem, his parents don't know about me and they can't for cultural reasons. So every time he hangs out with me he's lying to his parents, and has even lied to his friends (saying he has work) to bail on them and hang out with me. My mom's really getting into my ear about this saying he's \"made a career of lying\" and is lying to me too. I never saw him in this light until she brought it up, but a few instances have occurred where I questioned it. \n\nI remember once over the winter break, I asked if he had gone to the hockey game he bought tickets for his sister and him to go see. (I had no previous info about this, all I knew was he bought tickets). He said yes, but had very little info about it when I asked. He claimed to have had too much to drink and didn't remember much.\n\nI'm scared my mom is right, but I'm looking for advice on this, and I'm hoping someone else has been in the same shoes? (parents not knowing about you dating their son/daughter)", "summary": "Bf's parents don't know about me, causing him to lie and I'm scared he's lying to me too."}
{"id": "t3_35mrrx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my friend [26 F], she's in a LT relationship and developing a close friendship with someone she has crush on at work, should I do/say something?", "post": "I've been friends with P [26f] for about 5 years, she's been with her boyfriend J [27M] for 7 years. \n\nRecently she told me she's developed a crush on a guy she works with, G [31m]. At first I thought it was harmless, she just talked about how she thought he was cute and got nervous around him, I understand what that's like so I didn't think anything of it. However recently she's become better friends with him and they talk quite frequently, chatting at work, texting outside of work, and when we get drunk she will text him. Always something innocuous as far as she's told me, just asking what he's up to and joking about things they talk about at work. She revealed to me that they each lied to their coworkers so that they could have lunch together alone recently.\n\nI'm good friends with P and J, they are also good friends of my boyfriend of 6 years, M [25M]. I understand develop a physical attraction to someone else in a LT relationship, and I certainly don't fault her for that. I just think having secret lunches and drunk texting is starting to get into a grey area, I told her that I don't like where it's headed and she should cut down on the time she spends with him and how much they talk. \n\nShould I bring this up with her to again to emphasize how I feel? Do I owe it to J to say anything if she won't stop? I haven't told my boyfriend either since at first it was just girl talk about how there's a cute guy at her office, but now I feel like I'm keeping a big secret from him that affects our friend group. I know that I am loyal to a fault with my friends and she is one of my dearest friends so I'm torn. M is very good at being logical and unbiased, should I confide in him so he can help me decide what's the right thing to do?", "summary": "best friend is becoming close with a guy she has a crush on while she is in a LT relationship of 7 years, should I emphasize to her how I feel that this inappropriate?"}
{"id": "t3_4kp0o8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24 F] boyfriend [27 M] of 3 years best friend made a pass at me and I don't know where to go to from here.", "post": "We were on a break for about a month to focus on ourselves. Anyway, his friend (Mark) I were talking (I consider him a friend as well). During this break Mark got in contact with me and said we should definitely fuck. I asked him why and he said I was pretty.\nI got PISSED, both because he was betraying my boyfriend and because I felt objectified (he said at one point during the conversation that if it wasn't me it was prostitutes). When I said to Mark I would have to tell my boyfriend he guilt-tripped me and said that they were releasing their EP next month and that my relationship meant nothing compared to their EP release and essentially I was fucking him over.\n\nWhen I told my boyfriend about it he asked if I'd dealt with it, and I said yes I had. I was told later on that my boyfriend had a serious conversation with Mark and that they were no longer friends, just band mates. \n\nThen, last night I see a picture on Facebook of them with their arms around each other. Boyfriend claimed that they were advertising band merchandise but he wasn't wearing this shirt. I asked if they were still friends and he said he didn't know, and that I had no right to be upset about it because this was a betrayal to HIM and HIS band.\n\nI feel pretty disgusted by the entire thing because it looks like he's fine with this stuff. Should I just burry the hatchet? My boyfriend isn't very forgiving and he's shut me down when I try to talk abut it. I'm starting to wonder what this says about his character but I don't know exactly what I'm upset about.", "summary": "boyfriends friend/band mate hit on me. Boyfriend tells me to leave it alone because it was a greater betrayal to him than me. Should I drop the issue?"}
{"id": "t3_awm49", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can anyone be for the death penalty when trials (based on a jury) are never going to be fair and bring real justice?", "post": "I watch lots of crime dramas and read lots of the news, so maybe my understanding is skewed, but as far as I know: A jury is selected, these are people from the public called forward to do jury duty. A lot of these people don't want to be there, they want to go back to doing their jobs or looking after their family, so that would bring me to the conclusion they don't necessarily care that much (of course some people take it seriously, but it only takes 1 not to...).\n\nSo how can this be fair? How can a jury of \"normal\" people who don't necessarily have any interested in being there and people who could be easily swayed by charisma be given the responsibility of deciding if someone is guilty?\n\nLet's not forget how lawyers are different, a poor person could get a really shit lawyer who knows very little of what they do and represent the person poorly, or a rich person could get the best lawyer around. If both were charged with the same crime and the evidence was flaky, you can be pretty sure the rich guy will get off and the poor guy will be convicted, because representation matters a great deal. \n\nHow can people who agree with the Death Penalty think this is right? I would never really agree that the death penalty is *good* or *right*, but I could understand it **if** it was possible to be 100% sure of someone's guilt.", "summary": "How can anyone agree with the death penalty when the people relied on to form a decision aren't necessarily in the position to do so properly? How can anyone agree with the death penalty when the representation of the accused matters a huge deal?"}
{"id": "t3_3689gt", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by pissing my pants in my friend's car", "post": "Okay, so we're visiting Tallahassee to see the LoL Mid season invitational. It ended yesterday and our 6 hour drive begins. 40 minutes in I have to piss and I ask my friend \"Is it too early to have to pee?\" \"Yup.\" he says. Welp... better grab a bottle because he isn't pulling over. I grab a bottle, unzip, and try my hardest. My seating position is too awkward to piss, so I unbuckle and crouch over the bottle. Still nothing. This situation was more stressful than defusing a bomb while being strip searched by the TSA. After a minute of effort, I'm still dryer than California, so I admit defeat and start to put my little u/Ebyros away. As I lean back into my seat a steady stream of piss shot up like old faithful, and landed straight on my lap.\n\n\"OH SHIT. I JUST FUCKING PISSED ALL OVER MY PANTS.\"\n\nMy friends in the front seats lost their shit, but agreed to pull over.\n\nWith some brief felatio from a blow dryer and a trip to the urinal, my problems are solved.", "summary": "Tried to piss in a bottle but pissed on my lap like a fountain, and had to face fuck a blow dryer at a gas station to fix it."}
{"id": "t3_2w62kf", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/f], my boyfriend [21/m] asked for a break but we still talk", "post": "my boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half and 10 days ago we said he needed a break because recently we were arguing more and moved in with some friends for a bit. \n\n5 days ago he said we should talk, so he came over and we talked. he says he's very hurt and doesn't know how he feels about me and that he needs time and space and to not be pressured into doing something. I gave him space, we decided it's okay to hang out together once a week, to hang out with mutual friends, to text each other. he also said he was surprised of how well I was handling the break, he was expecting I would be more upset and sad. \nI haven't seen him since, we exchanged a few texts afterwards and this morning he messaged saying he was going to ask me to hang out today but that he was sick and it was contagious. i didn't expect him to want to see me so soon.\n\nwe're going to be hanging out in a few days. what should i expect? could it be a sign that he's approaching the end of the break? could it mean he misses me or still loves me?", "summary": "boyfriend said he needed some space, is unsure whether he loves me, but wants to hang out. what does this mean?"}
{"id": "t3_lzpxj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hi reddit, new user! Please, I need some inspiration. What kind of observational/field studies pertain to internet censorship?", "post": "Hi reddit. Newcomer, here! I've been lurking for ages. Too long, in fact. So this was an excuse to change that because Reddit is the best place for this. My name was originally just to be quick, but now I'm going to continue with it!\n\nHere's the fuckin' deal. I am a college freshman currently taking English 102. My research topic is Internet Censorship. I'm supposed to do an observational study. I am allowed to use the internet itself, for example, a forum or, hell, even Reddit. Somebody viewed Occupy Wall Street for a paper about a person's voice in the world. Another person attended a lecture about Transcendentalism for her chosen topic of Thoreau. \n\nMy problem, what the fuck can I do? I am at a complete loss for this. \nThe stance I will be taking is AGAINST censorship of the internet. I've thought about pushing the envelope on a forum to see how much I can get away with before I begin getting censored\nAlso, if internet censorship has affected you, whether financially, emotionally, or in ANY form, I would enjoy an email interview with you. \nI need interviews as well...\n\nSORRY for the wall of text. Be like Good Guy Greg and help me out, please! I will be in your debt forever. \n\nThank you!", "summary": "Internet Censorship. What can I observe that is involved with Internet Censorship. Also, if internet censorship of any kind has affected you, would you be willing to do an email interview with me?"}
{"id": "t3_1zmmud", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Not Hungry", "post": "I started dieting around New Years, cliche I know, and exercising in February. So far I'm down about 13 lbs, most came off last month. \n\nI've been cycling lower calorie days and higher calorie days, generally 1000-2200 with one \"fast\"/week under 500. Also avoiding bad carbohydrates. \n\nLast Thursday was my fast day and the day before I ate about 2200 calories. I woke up wasn't hungry, felt full all day, had a protein shake at 5pm and some cooked spinach. Went jog-walking for an hour and a 1/2, got home thinking i would be famished, but felt fine. Forced myself to eat more protein and some veggies. \n\nI woke up on the next day, again expecting to feel starved, but feeling fine. I didn't eat again. I went to work, lunch time came and I felt full so I ate nothing. I made myself have some chicken and veggies about an hour before the end of the day, because I was going to the gym. I worked really Hard for 1.5 hours again and again felt full after. Forced myself to eat again. \n\nI did the exact same thing Saturday-Tuesday, taking a day off of working out, and feel fine this morning, full even. I am wondering how long I should continue this? Has anyone else ever gone through this? \n\nMy sedentary BMR is around 2000 calories and I'm using about 900 working out so I'm operating at a 2400 deficit. Is this dangerous? I think it's ok to fast a few days,  but should I quit working out / do I need to force myself to eat more. I'm M:25:248lbs. Advice please!", "summary": "version: I cycle calories and after a fasting day I didn't get hungry so I kept fasting while working out; safe or unsafe? Any advice or experiences? Why am I not hungry?"}
{"id": "t3_2ryjac", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[18 M] helped a girl go up a hill, now my gf [18 F] is really angry", "post": "So there was a party last night and me [18M] and my friends were a bit drunk and decided to climb up a hill next to the place the party was held at. The hill was really snowy and quite steep. There was maybe 5 of us, including a girl who at one point stated that her legs are quite tired and she has trouble going on. So I felt like a real gentleman as I told her I could piggyback her up for the last 30 or so meters. So I did. \nIn my opinion, it's not a big deal at all, but having told this story to my girlfriend [18F], thinking it was no big deal (we've been together for over a year now and she wasn't at the party), she became really angry and at one point even told me she was going to leave me unless I stop justifying what I had done.\n\n/r/relationships, what do you think about this situation? Do you think it is justified for my girlfriend to be that angry at me for a piggyback ride? I really love her and I couldn't imagine that she'd ever get so mad for a little thing like that.", "summary": "I helped a girl go up a hill by offering her a piggyback ride, now my gf is really angry."}
{"id": "t3_19g081", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I [f/26] don't know what to do about a confusing ex [m/26] [X-Post relationship_advice]", "post": "I am looking for advice regarding my exboyfriend. We dated for 5 and a half years before he drunkenly broke up with me one night after we had been looking at apartments to move into. We taught in Korea for a year and traveled SE Asia for a year and a half of our relationship. There was no warning for the breakup. I suspect that he got scared about long term commitment and moving out, but he stated that it was because he did not see a future with me. \n\nAfter about 2 months of being broken up, we decided to become friends... which quickly turned into friends with benefits. This has been happening for the past six months. Last month he told me that he didn't know if he wanted to try to be with me or if he should wait to see if he would find someone else... that being with me would be \"easy\" because he knows me so well. He refuses to say what we are and I want input about whether or not I should just give up and believe that we will never be together in that way again. \n\nHe is my best friend, so of course this hurts, but I don't know if I am wasting my time hoping that he will come around. Thanks", "summary": "Basically I have been seeing an ex and want to know if I should wait for him to make a decision about dating me"}
{"id": "t3_50u0bw", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "I [23M] would prefer to be more of an assistant to my GF [22F] than I am right now...", "post": "Basically, I'm in the cutthroat field of real estate. And I absolutely hate it, insofaras some of the practices are concerned. My gf is a very romantic person and I love her dearly. But it pains me that having to work, essentially \"on call\", almost every single day is starting to severely encroach on the time I have for her.\n\nShe is in her last year of a graduate degree in a very lucrative field. And it's highly unlikely that I'd be able to come close financially to her income. She's said before that she doesn't even mind paying for everything.\n\nBut right now, I'm in a sort of conflicting situation. Truth be told, I'm not a very career oriented person. And my current job is entirely sales and commission based. Where, I do not like the cutthroat corporate culture, in which I'm basically trying to swallow my pride and sell shit to people that they might not even want or probably would not be best for them.\n\nIn a career or job, I want to do something that makes a good difference on society and not something where I just rake in a ton of money. I'd rather make 25K in a job like that, perhaps nonprofit or government, than a million dollars in a field or industry that is built around shady corporate or profit-maximizing practices.\n\nAdditionally, I want to be able to provide something different for my girlfriend... I want to be a shoulder to lean on for her. I want to be there for her (she's prone to panic attacks), and I want to support her emotionally. But it's very difficult to juggle that and this type of work. And when I work that often, we wind up fading into something more akin to mere aquaintances because I just wind up so absorbed in it.", "summary": "I want to be either a low stressed worker in a socially active job or to be a stay at home husband that does everything around the house- handyman, cleaner, laundry, cooking, care, etc."}
{"id": "t3_egle4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I find someone's address from the mid 50's?", "post": "Hey Reddit,\nMy grandfather recently passed away in June, leaving my dad with access to a lot of his old papers from the Marines. My dad has been going through a lot of old family pictures and those documents, trying to place where his family lived at different times (it was quite a few being a military brat). I started dating a guy from near South Bend, Indiana which is consequently where my dad was born in 1954. When looking for the address where he lived there, it seems to be the only one missing from all the documents. He knows it was in the area surrounding Notre Dame, but hasn't had much luck finding an address.\n\nBasically, I wanted to know if anyone else out there has found any resources for locating OLD addresses that people lived at, or where might be a good place to start. I'm thinking of maybe contacting any schools he attended or seeing if I can get access to census data.", "summary": "Dad was born in South Bend, IN in 1954. We can't find any addresses that his family lived at there. Where can I look?"}
{"id": "t3_4rb09k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my ex-girlfriend [21F] of seven months, I may have feelings for her again?", "post": "So, backstory: I dated this girl for seven months. Nicest girl i've ever met, my parents loved her, just overall great. But I was an asshole: flirted with others at the beginning, stopped, and I broke up with her at the end because in our last month together I was talking to someone else and went on a date and generally cheated and was a bigger asshole. I found out she loved me, but I didn't love her, and I didn't want to continue this act and pretend like nothing happened, so I just cut things off, never telling her I cheated. \n\n\"You're an asshole fuck you die OP\"--I get it, but if I wanted to hear that i'd post in a different subreddit. \n\nFast forward a while after we break up, we start talking again, as friends. We talk every day. One day I invite her over for conversation, next time i invite her for the same thing, we end up having sex. We do this a couple more times (with sex, or at least passionate making out). We flirt, but i usually initiate. \n\nSometimes, I reflect on what I've done and realize I really fucked up. This girl was truly the best, and she regarded me as the same when I secretly was an asshole. But I'm afraid of commitment, and I don't think I'm ready for a serious relationship just yet. But I don't want to lose her, either.", "summary": "Broke up with a girl cause I was a selfish asshole, ended up with regret, wondering what to do now."}
{"id": "t3_gjsup", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you deal with an epic facebook failure?", "post": "I broke more than a few cardinal internet and social rules. A high school acquaintance posts a status about Christianity being contradictory and how a higher power or \"God\" would disapprove of these contradictions in his opinion. After that a man asked for some examples so I brought up adam and eve's story of the fall of man. We both civilly post our positions and points.\n\nI forgot that this high school acquaintance shortens his last name on facebook. The guy I'm arguing with is his dad. I barely know this guy in the first place let alone his dad. So I posted an argument that wasn't directly involving me, that's unprovable both ways, that steps on social boundaries, on facebook. Should I just agree to disagree? Say, oh that's a good idea I'll read more on the subject, thanks for debate? Delete my facebook, again? I don't think there's hope to save face. Admittedly, I don't have much of a good reputation anyways, I simply replied to something that interested me and realized all too soon what I had done.", "summary": "I debated religion with a high school acquaintance's dad on facebook based off of a rhetorical question and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_36ewv5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27F] found \"creep shots\" on my SO's [31M] computer.", "post": "I think this belongs here but I'm not sure. Not really sure where else to ask for advice or how to proceed. I'm not even sure if \"creep shot\" is the correct term. Either way, there are photos on my SO's computer of him taking covert pics of girls in public. Legs, boobs, girls wearing really short skirts, etc. yes, one that I saw may classify as an up skirt but only because the girl had on a really short skirt and it was from a slightly downward angle. \n\nEither way, I don't know what to do. We're married, I love him. Do I trust him? Not really, but we were working on that. And I wasn't snooping for no reason. I was getting on his computer to borrow it and I asked him first. Went into a folder with a pic of our kid and those pictures were scattered throughout the folder.\n\nI don't really have anyone I can confide in because I don't want my friends to think bad of him. He's actually a really good dude.", "summary": "Husband taking creep shots. Wtf do I do. I literally have no one else to talk to about this."}
{"id": "t3_13if34", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Union will be getting retroactive raise just after I quit, am I entitled to the raise too since it impacts the time I worked there?", "post": "Sorry if this is long winded.\n\nI worked at a utility company in Florida and am apart of a small union.  A union contract got delayed while I was working there and about 3 months before I put in my notice, an agreement had been announced which would give everyone retroactive raises back to the start date of the contract.  They announced a date for payout finally and when I put in my notice I made sure it was 1.5 pay periods after said date in case of a delay.  Go figure, it gets delayed by \"up to 6 months\" and I'm not withdrawing my notice.\n\nI briefly probed my union reps and HR department and initial responses are No, but feel like that's bullshit.  \n\nWith that in mind, do I have a good argument for getting the back pay even though I wont be working there when it pays out, but was when it was announced?\n\nAny information/advice would be appreciated.", "summary": "Union contract approved 2 years late, retro pay announced, I put in notice, retro payout delayed, told I wouldnt get my retro pay if I wasnt working at the company at payout time."}
{"id": "t3_2zyp8q", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not procrastinating", "post": "Alright, rewind to 3 and a half weeks ago. It's trash day. The spring thaw has yet to come at this point, and the previous evening we had some freezing rain and then later a blanket of snow to cover everything up. Normally I am one of those people who usually waits a little bit longer than they should to do household chores. Today I decide I'm going to have the trash out to the curb well before the garbage man rolls up instead of 5 minutes beforehand like I usually do. As I'm rolling along to the curb I hit a nice smooth patch of ice right on the street and fall straight on my ass.  I lay there for several moments takeing in the scene around me. On my shirt and pants are now what I can only assume is soiled cat litter. Used newspapers are now blowing into the neighbor's yard, and I can just barely begin to smell the rotting food from the day before when I cleaned out the refrigerator. I slowly get up and limp back into the house, with any thought of cleaning up the mess I have just made as far off as the glass bottles that are now rolling down the hill. I quickly realized this is not going to be just a simple bruise but that I in fact broke my wrist and arm. Now here is the kicker. As my brother pulled up to my house to drive me to the ER,  who else but the salt truck decides to roll up my street and plow at that very moment. If I had just waited 30 minutes like I usually do to take out the garbage I never would have  fell and broke my arm. Now I'm stuck in a cast for at least 3 more weeks.", "summary": "fell on the ice and broke my arm. wouldn't have if I had waited and procrastinated like I usually do with the garbage."}
{"id": "t3_30hi9o", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to break into a car", "post": "Obligatory this didn't happen today, but it came up in conversation and I thought I'd share. \n\nI had just bought my first car, a lovely black Subaru Forester, and I was driving around an apartment complex looking for my friend's house. I was extremely lost and had gotten out to walk around/look for their place in this complex, and I called my friend as I made my way back to my car for directions. \n\nIt was an old car and I could only use my key to unlock it, to make it worse sometimes the lock was a bit of a stickler. So I'm at my car, trying to force my key into this lock while I'm on the phone, and the door won't budge. Im getting frustrated, and start hearing some guy yelling from an apartment balcony. It was a drunk college kid town so I didn't really pay attention until he says \"IM CALLING THE FUCKING COPS\" \n\nAt this point I look up, and this guy is giving me the death glare. I look in front of me, low and behold, it's not my car... It just looks a lot like it, oops! Guy must have thought I was inebriated or something as I tried to loudly mumble \"my bad...\" and stumble to my car, two cars away. I've never driven out of a parking lot so fast.", "summary": "Mistook a strangers car for mine, they watched on as I failed to unlock it and thought I was breaking in."}
{"id": "t3_1tn00x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My(f25) boyfriend(24) of over a year, we say \"I love you\" but should I let him know how I really feel?", "post": "I'm head over heels for my boyfriend.  We've been together for almost two years but I feel like I've known him my whole life.  I wish I would have known him long ago...  I'm in constant *awe* of how much I love, care for and adore this man.  I am stupidly in love with him; I'm confident when saying *I have never felt this way before.*  After being with him, I'm sure I've never really been in love before.\nSometimes I look at him and think \"how the... wha... how... who am I to have this phenominal person here with me?\"  \nThe short time I've spent with him is enough to last me a lifetime of happiness.  BUT, I'm afraid to tell him.  1-2 yrs isn't really that long to be with a person, and although I tell him I love him, I care for him... those feelings are merely service.  I don't want to scare him off.  I don't want him to think I'm a psycho.  Then again, I don't want him to think I'm a heartless bitch either.  I know I'm young but I am a bit slow to pace when it comes to the whole \"I love you forever\" thing.\nTonight, he and I are having our Christmas; I'm making dinner, I've baked cookies and wrapped presents... I also wrote him a letter of how wonderful he makes me feel - is it too soon to tell him?  Should I wait a few months longer?", "summary": "My bo of almost 2yrs and I exchange *I love yous* but I've not really told him how I feel.  Is it too soon?"}
{"id": "t3_sq2g8", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "This morning I woke up to do a diaper changing and found a baby sock in the diaper! What  baby blooper(s) have you or your partner done?", "post": "Let me clarify the events that processed this. 4am, baby starts fussing \" honey, can you go change him? I'm just to tired to get up.\" My loving husband gets up and changes my son's diaper and then hands him to me to feed. Baby falls back to sleep, then my husband and I fall back to sleep. This morning at 8am baby wakes up again to be changed and feed. I up do his onesie and see something dark coming out of the side of the diaper. My first thought was \"o my god you pooped, and its coming down your leg!\" So I quickly open up the diaper to start cleaning this up and see my son's little brown monkey sock. Sure enough when I looked to the left bare foot, it confirmed it all. So what baby bloopers are you guys guilty of?", "summary": "Husband does middle of the night changing. woke up with little monkey sock in the diaper. Thought it was poop."}
{"id": "t3_2udia9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by losing my virginity to a random guy on reddit! NSFW", "post": "**person on reddit who I did the do with, if you see this.. it was still pretty great and you're lovely and this is my way of dealing with my own. Life. Stuff. Yes.**\n\nSo, this happened a few hours ago... I'm still wondering if it's a fuck up or not. \n\nAnyways, I've always been pretty... quiet. I study, I get my shit done and don't talk to many people. However, I'm pretty bad with emotional connections. I'm empathetic, sympathetic, all that. I cry like a bitch when I watch the Lion King, emotional movie. I decided a few days ago to be more outgoing, I posted some thing on r4r (not the normal one, haha) and asked a guy to help me out, I wanted to... experience more? Sooner or later (I've been thinking of it for a while) I realized he was someone I wanted to have sex with for the first time. I wasn't emotionally connected to him so there was no huge emotional risk, he was older than me (much) which I *really liked* and he was into bdsm (again, really liked). \n\nSo, we plan to meet. Not necessarily have sex (though we were going over to his empty apartment, so..), but just to meet. We drove back to his apartment where I proceeded to be very awkward and stand in various places of his bedroom being awkward and not wanting to sit anywhere because everything I was doing was just so.. awkward? Finally we cuddled, things progressed. We spent the day cuddling and cumming, it was pretty great. \n\nThen I went home. \n\nNow, this was my ideal... way of losing my virginity. And it went great, but I feel pretty *empty* now. I was raped when I was younger, maybe this wasn't such a good idea?", "summary": "Wow me, maybe it's *not* a good idea to try filling emotional holes with penises. Silly girl, emotional holes aren't the same thing as vaginas!\""}
{"id": "t3_1vxx9j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [23m] been in this new relationship with this girl [21f] for 3 mo ths now. She says we have to wait untill marriage for intimacy.", "post": "To start off, I'd like to say im semi ok with this. But I have some worries. lets call her C. Over the course of three months I've come to the logical (or illogical,  however you want to look at it) conclusion that I am head over heels in love.\n\nI personally dont belive in marriage. I have my own personal beliefs that stray from normal Christianity. For me, I dont think god would give a shit for a signed piece of paper and some shiny metals. All he would care about is if shes my wife in my heart (shes not yet). \n\nRegardless of that.\nBut she insists that we would have to be married first. My first worry is, however much I love this women, what if we were not physically compatible? Say we get married and find this out. I can't go the rest of my life without sex. Nor want either of us to be pushed into someone else's arms for it. Has anyone on reddit had this problem? \n\nSecondly,  im her first boyfriend. And I have this little voice in the back of my head constantly telling me \"you never stay with your first\". She has feelings for me. But what if she decided to move on... just because? Anyone here ever stayed with your first bf or gf?", "summary": "I'm her first boyfriend, can I expect her to stay with me? What would happen if I waited for marriage and we find out we were not really physically compatible?"}
{"id": "t3_3kvn2a", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Orphaned at 23, is leaving a loving boyfriend acceptable to go travel for an undetermined amount of time and develop some self-love or am I just running away?", "post": "I'm going to try to sum this up with as little detail as I can. My mom died when I was fourteen then I moved in with guardians until seventeen. At that point, I've moved homes at least every six months while being one of the caregivers for my father who was dying of Alzheimer's. Starting in August of 2013, my friend and I went to California to travel around for what ended up being five months and see some new shit and it was great. Then we came back to our home state, Oklahoma, but ended up doing it again in August of 2014. One month after leaving, the car we were living in got totaled, then a month after that my dad died. Right before leaving I had met a fantastic guy in Oklahoma that I'd stayed in contact with daily while I was gone. I came back and stayed with him for a while. I ended up getting my own place and lived there for four months then we moved in together. We've been in this place for three months when it hit me like a ton of fucking bricks; I had to leave again. I have fought it for a while but it's completely overwhelming me. We had the break up talk tonight and he's understanding but very sad. Hands down the best guy I've ever been with but I'm just not happy. I need even more soul searching, especially being orphaned at twenty-three, and don't think it's appropriate for him to tag along or wait for me to figure it out. I'm scared I'll regret it and am pretty sure this is a full blown quarter life crisis where travel seems like the only semi healing answer. I mean, what the hell? Given the details you've got, is leaving the most loving guy I've come across the stupidest thing I can do to go figure out how to love myself by myself? I'm worried that this is just a terrible pattern that I'm accustomed to that results in me cutting someone off before I'm left one way or another.", "summary": "Orphaned at 23, is leaving a loving boyfriend acceptable to go travel for an undetermined amount of time and develop some self-love?"}
{"id": "t3_1hob2x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[18/M] GF[17/F] She wants to break it off because she would rather be alone than in a relationship at all and I don't know what to do.", "post": "Me and my gf have been dating for about 6 months now, and she told me recently that she would rather be friends than be in a relationship because a relationship is too much effort. \n\nShe has her reasons for thinking it's too much because she is used to being alone all the time, and because of that is always doing something to keep herself busy, whether it's schoolwork or just having fun by herself, and having me in the equation doesn't seem to compute. Also she tends to worry about me because I have a very dysfunctional family, and struggled with a bout of depression recently. \n\nI finally told her that she doesn't need to worry about me, and should focus on herself. This however caused her to absolutely treat me as if I'm not her boyfriend, and I always have to remind her by putting my arm around her or kissing her that I'm even around.\n\n I just feel really sad about this and I'm sorry about this meaningless post, but I needed to get this out somehow.", "summary": "My girlfriend agreed to stay in a relationship after stating that she doesn't think we need to be in one, and now it feels like we are just friends even though we still are dating."}
{"id": "t3_1bsq65", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "28m freaked that 25f got wasted with strangers", "post": "We've been together for a year. She's pretty responsible usually and I value that greatly in her. She enjoys having one drink usually when she's out, but rarely gets drunk I'd say. We had separate plans last night so we planned on getting together later. She was going to a dessert place. \n\nMuch to my surprise when I get to her place, she's wasted. She tells me that afterward they went to a bar and a group of strangers invited them into their back room for drinks. She could hardly stand or talk and her breath  reeked of alcohol. She had this cute tipsy girl demeanor about her that made me feel a little sick. She told me about how guys were asking her number and she told them she was taken. I appreciated her honesty but I'm also really shocked by the radical lapse in behavior. I feel really uneasy about this. Am I right to feel a little bit deceived and a little bit worried?", "summary": "gf got more wasted with a group of strangers than I've ever seen her and I'm worried about the out-of-character behavior."}
{"id": "t3_4i7g2e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (28M) with my GF (22F) of 11 months. First time spending mother's day with her. Her mother died a few years ago, how can I help her honor her mother this weekend?", "post": "So as the title explains, my girlfriend and I have been dating for just short of a year. This is the first time I have gone through mother's day with her. Normally, this wouldn't be a big deal, but she lost her mother about 7 years ago to a battle with Lymphoma. I know she misses her mother greatly and I want to do what I can to make Sunday as easy as possible for her. I know that I will spend this weekend comforting her whenever she needs it, but can y'all think of anything I could do to help her honor her mother? Because I am sure someone will ask, I have a very good feeling she would appreciate and love something like that.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "First mother's day with my girlfriend who lost her mother 7 years ago. What can I do to help honor her mother?"}
{"id": "t3_3zlxrq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[21 M] girlfriend[19 F] of about half a year broke up with me about a month ago. She gave me hints about dating me again. Should I stick with it?", "post": "I've had a rough year last year. I was getting over my big ex and now I found myself with someone else. Luckily this was a huge step in letting go of the past. I finally stopped thinking about anyone else other than my current girlfriend. However she forgot my birthday. I became upset and told her I was not ok with her just leaving me alone like that. She claimed she was tired and didn't want to do anything with me that day. I didn't speak to her for a few days I was so upset she completely ignored me. I confronted her about it. She said she doesn't want to fight and said this relationship is no longer what she wants. I was angry. \nI don't like it when someone to constantly say \"i love you\" then the next day throw you away like trash. I felt like trash. So for a while I didn't talk to her but we ended up hanging out together as friends. While we were friends we went on dates kissed and even had sex. I thought she was really into me again. Last night I asked her to be my girlfriend she said no. Then I asked her to leave. Her reason was that she loved me but not as much as she used to. Before she left she said she wanted to continue going on dates but would like more time to think about things. A mutual friend asked her if she would date me again and she said yes however she wasn't ready for a relationship yet. I'm not sure if I should continue seeing her. I feel like my heart was ripped apart when she said no to me last night. For now I want to be alone for a week without seeing her. after that week I have no idea if I should continue our relationship. What should I do?", "summary": "Girlfriend dumps me after a confrontation. Continue being a couple without the title just to get denied a month later. Asks to have more time to think about things. Not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_30m2u1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] want a future with my bipolar gf [18 f], but a breakup seems inevitable and I am torn about it.", "post": "We have dating for about 4 months now, but we're fwb for about a year prior to me asking her out. I have immense feelings for this girl and can honestly see myself having a future with her. The problem is her bipolar disorder and I feel it is tearing our relationship apart. The good times are great, but obviously the bad times are bad. I know she does not mean it, but we have been getting into fights a lot recently and it's pushing my tolerance and patience to the limits. I am not usually an emotional guy, but she has brought out emotions in me I didn't think we're possible. I have she'd tears in front if this girl just because of how open and honest I've been with her. Currently she is on no medication, but is on a list to receive some in the next few months. My plan was to stick around to see how the medicine would effect her mood swings and possibly make her more stable. I am scared of the future, how is she going to act as an adult?  Are we going to fight for the rest of our lives? Is she going to cheat on my during a mania stage? She always says I'm to good for her and to just leave so I don't have to deal with her bullshit, but I talked to her about it and she agrees that it is nonsense. Just the thought of breaking up with her brings tears to my eyes and I don't know what to do. I need advice, has anyone else been in a ltr with someone with bipolar? Thanks.", "summary": "Girlfriend has bipolar, has caused me to turn into an emotional wreck, and scared of what will happen if I do decide to have a future with her. Should I end it before I get even more attached?"}
{"id": "t3_234qov", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [14F] Girlfriend broke up with me [15M] and didn't really give an explanation", "post": "This girl I was dating for about 3 weeks broke up with me 3 days ago, she was saying that her mom wanted her to because of her grades and whatnot.\n\n so I asked her if her mom actually wanted her to break up with me, or if she was just trying to breakup in a nice way and she said \"Yeah she does. Plus I've never been good at relationships anyway.\" And I said \"So you don't want to date me anymore?\" And she said \"Yeah .-. But ughh its hard to explain\". \n\nThen right after this conversation she started texting me like we were still dating (ex. \"hey whats up?') Except there wasn't any flirting like there was before. I talked to her sister about it and she said \"Btw dude she still like you but doesn't wanna be in a relationship so you guys are still buddies\". \n\nIs it friendzone? Or is there a chance I can get her back when shes ready for a relationship? It really confused me because the day before we broke up she was talking about how much she liked me and holding hands/cuddling and all that stuff. (She said \"So when I was holding your hand I was thinking of this Pierce the Veil song that says 'I wanna hold your hand so tight, Im gonna break my wrist'\"). \n\nLmao that made me smile, but anyway yeah so I honestly dont know what happened here :|", "summary": "My gf broke up with me suddenly and I have no idea if she \"friendzoned\" me or if she just doesn't want a relationship in general."}
{"id": "t3_uyfh2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Argument with my girlfriend gets too heated, she thinks I shoved her.", "post": "Me (19) and my girlfriend (20) of two years got into a very serious argument, I've never seen her that angry before and I'm really not sure why she was so angry. It was at her apartment and it started over something like I didn't pick something up. Anyway, I just decided to leave because I didn't feel like I deserved all of the verbal abuse I was taking for apparently no reason. As I was leaving she blocked the door and tried to stop me from leaving, while still yelling at me. I gently as I could, tried to move her out of the way and she tripped over a pair of boots and fell.\n\n I didn't mean to do anything like that, but now I feel like I'm abusive. I don't know how to feel, she seems alright now, but I think she thinks I meant for that to happen. I didn't leave afterward and we talked because I really didn't mean for her to fall down I just wanted to escape the situation. Please [1] /r/relationships am I in the wrong here, I feel like a horrible person and that I may have done permanent damage to my relationship.", "summary": "Got into an argument with my girlfriend, she wouldn't let me leave, I moved her out of the way and she tripped over some boots, now she thinks I shoved her."}
{"id": "t3_hfpc6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Brother's Ex-girlfriend of 2 years broke up with him because she was seeing another guy when he was in a different college. What should I or He do?", "post": "Basically what happened was that my brother went off to college in a different state. His girlfriend went to college in our home state. Things were going pretty well considering they video chatted almost everyday. during winter break he came back to visit and everything was fine. He then left for college again and this is when things started going downhill. I noticed on my brother's girlfriend facebook page a lot of posts from this one guy [lets call him jake]. All of these posts look like it was part of a conversation so I assumed that she was replying by posting on his wall opposed to just replying in the comments. I tried to look at his wall but he set it to private. This got me a little worried and it did concern my brother as well. He didn't want to look jealous so he didn't make a big deal out of it. He did, however, talk to her about it and she just said that he's just a friend from class.\n\nFast forward 3 months and now my brother is back. My brother then gets his wisdom teeth pulled out and has to stay at home. While my parents are at work and I'm at school, my brother's girlfriend got dropped off from her college (her college still has school) from her friend. She tells him that she has to leave in about 30 minutes to go back to college and that she will get picked up from her friend at a near by park. My brother tells her that he will walk her to the park but she refuses profusely. He didn't want to push the issue so he complies. He later finds out that her \"friend\" that came to pick her up was indeed Jake. He then talks to her about it and she just said they're just friends once more. He tells her that he doesn't want her to talk to him that much in a flirty way.", "summary": "Skip forward 2 weeks and his girlfriend tells him \"I'm confused whether I like you or if I like Jake [a guy from her college], and I need space\" Tell me reddit, what should he or I do?"}
{"id": "t3_izjkl", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Someone please help me understand the logic behind this.", "post": "Homosexuality and bisexuality are no longer considered by most to be health disorders, yet as I read about sexual motivation in one of my college textbooks, a thought occurred to me, detailed below. All the following behaviors have some research that attributes some of a behavior to genetics.\n\nAnorexia and bulimia are universally considered health disorders because they are dangerous, stem from a mistaken view of themselves, and sometimes fatal. They typically have lower self-esteem and are more prone to depression. From an evolutionary perspective, these people are less likely to survive because they don't receive enough energy from not properly eating food to run away from a survival risk, such as a lion.\n\nObesity (not just being overweight) is dangerous because of an abnormally large amount of fats that drastically increases the risk for heart attacks and strokes. Again, from an evolutionary perspective, these people are less likely to survive because they are unable to run very quickly.\n\nHomosexuality and bisexuality, on the other, are acceptable social behaviors nowadays, even though they have higher rates of depression than heterosexual persons and are frequently ridiculed and assaulted for their sexual deviance. From an evolutionary perspective, homosexuality is a self-destructive behavior in the sense that none of the genetic material of the homosexual gets passed on to the next generation. In simpler words, heterosexuality is considered \"normal\" sexuality because it will always (barring infertility) pass on genetic material to the next generation.\n\nDon't make this topic about love or genetic inheritance causing the behavior, as for this discussion these are cop-out arguments.", "summary": "What makes some behaviors and characteristics, like eating disorders, abnormal and others, like homosexuality, seen as no different from normal?"}
{"id": "t3_3r9ff0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Unsure if I [27 M] should continue with my SO [25 F] of 3 months", "post": "Initially met her from tinder. She's very attractive, fairly intelligent, and athletic. She communicates well and even has a healthy dose of common sense. She's ambitious, yet down to earth. She really has no undesirable qualities, however, for some reason I haven't become enamored with her. \n\nBecause of this, I'm having a hard time finding the energy and enthusiasm to date her properly and to perform romantic gestures. Normally, when I've been \"in like\" with someone, I'm energized by them and I will do anything for them, but with her, I haven't gone out of my way as much.\n\nHas anyone felt similarly, only to grow in love later? Any thoughts as to whether this is significant enough that I should break up with her? I'm not motivated to date someone I don't want to spend my life with long term, and if there's an appropriate time to end things it would be now, especially before the Holiday season.", "summary": "Dating someone incredible, but haven't felt strongly about them. Normally when I like someone, I'm energized by them but it hasn't been that way with her."}
{"id": "t3_4w6ut0", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "My girlfriend [18] of five months says that it can be \"draining\" to be around me [19]? Should I be worried for the future?", "post": "Hey there everyone, thanks for reading and any advice you can give here, I'll try and make it brief. At this point, I'll mention we are long distance, and that we've spent an exceptional amount of time together this summer as we're both off college for now. We both spend time with our friends, but lately she's been spending less and less with me, and more with her friends. When I asked her about it, she said that it was draining for her to be around someone for too long, and that she needed some time to breathe.\n\nI'm not so much worried about that, I'm fine with giving her more breathing room, but I guess I'm just concerned that this is going to become a repeat thing, and was wondering if anyone could chime in and give me some advice.", "summary": "Should I be worried about my girlfriend progressively spending less time with me and saying it can be draining, or do I just need to back off a bit?"}
{"id": "t3_1byn0l", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "\"Resigned\" from my current job today...how should I talk to future employers about this?", "post": "So, long story short, about three weeks ago I was written a misdemeanor citation for possession of marijuana and possession of paraphernalia. This was after work and was not on property or anything. Anyways, fast forward three weeks to today and I am called into the office. My boss found out about it and I was given the option to either be fired or to resign. I obviously went with the latter.\n\nMy question is, how should I approach this if asked about it in the future? My supervisor (not the same person as the boss that \"fired\" me) said that he'd still be willing to let me continue to use him as a reference. Him and I got along well and I was never a problem at work (in fact, I was quite the opposite) so I still think he will give me a good review if questioned. \n\nAnyways, I have a phone interview this Friday (thank god) and am just wondering how I should approach this problem. There's no way that they know about it and I'm sure they just think I'm still working there. Obviously I'm not going to bring it up but if they ask me about my work there, should I just tell them that I don't work there anymore? Should I be honest and say I resigned? I guess another thing I have going for me is that I never *technically* was fired...I resigned. Anyways, what do you guys think?", "summary": "I was given the option to resign from my job instead of being fired. I did. If asked, how should I tell prospective employers about this during interviews?"}
{"id": "t3_l8kp3", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "Have trouble getting started in the morning?", "post": "I do. But there's a root cause of my getting motivated in the morning. Obviously, it's the internet.\n\nThe internet has a huge snowball effect. It's easier to stay away completely than it is to do it in moderation, especially in the morning when everything seems like a better idea than going to class or going into lab or work or whatever. The key is to do NO INTERNETTING in the morning. None. Don't sleep with your smartphone next to your bed--you'll just load up reddit the moment you open your eyes. Bad!\n\nChange your morning routine. Instead of blindly opening up your sleeping laptop, go straight into the bathroom to piss and wash your face or shower, then grab breakfast--NOT AT YOUR COMPUTER--eat in the kitchen or something. Brush your teeth, grab your shit, and roll out. \n\nI always tell myself \"Oh I'll just check reddit for a minute and then go into lab\" (I'm a grad student), but end up internetting for like 3 hours straight, and by then, I tell myself it's a wasted day and just internet the whole day and never go in. It sucks.", "summary": "The internet is fine, but DON'T MAKE IT PART OF YOUR MORNING ROUTINE if your goal is to have even a semblance of a productive day."}
{"id": "t3_2silrd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my Fiance [30M] 4 years, he's stopped being hygienic at all.", "post": "I don't know what to even think or how to approach this one without being rude, but I'm at the point that maybe I NEED to be.\n\nMy fiance and I have had a rough road financially but otherwise we've been great together. We're finally on our feet and about to move into a new apartment Feb 1st.\n\nThings are looking up for both of us, we're making more money and work is plenty.\n\nBut I noticed over the last few MONTHS he's been forgetting to brush his teeth, or if he saw me doing it he would. Now he just flat out does not, and I've bought him 2 toothbrushes and tooth paste in the last 2 months as a hint hint. Mouth wash and a tongue scraper too!\n\nIt has been over a week since he last showered and this man works outside all day under filthy cars.\n\nIt's gotten so bad that I'm repulsed by him, he has horrific athlete's foot and won't do anything about it. It smells so fucking bad the instant he takes his shoes off. He has terrible eczema and every day I come home to see him itching and scratching like a crazy person and just shedding skin all over the fucking place. Like in my bed and in the kitchen.\n\nNot that I blame him for the eczema, but I know it's a million times better with bathing and lotion.\n\nI'm at my wits end, I really do not understand this. Has anyone else gone through this? He's not even depressed, we have GREAT things to look forward to. \n\nEven his clothes are filthy! Crunchy dirty athletes feet socks reused and I can smell his jeans.\n\nThen he wonders why I don't want to have sex and he's coming at me with those black fingernails. No please.\n\nWhat makes a man who used to shower and lotion up and wear cologne and get frequent hair cuts just stop and say, nah?! I don't understand it.", "summary": "Fiance won't bathe or brush his teeth. Any insight? What should I do? Considering the direct approach!"}
{"id": "t3_tlrp5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My nieces in another state have a bipolar, physically abusive mother. What can I do to help?", "post": "Their mom divorced my brother over a decade ago and he only gets to see his three girls on the weekends. I presume the divorce was because he couldn't handle her outbreaks anymore but the courts granted her custody because she's the mother. Also, it didn't help that a neighbor called the cops during one of their domestic disputes and my brother agreed to spend the night in jail (it's been a long time but I believe the reason was because one of them had to go, and although the cop was siding with my brother, their youngest daughter was still breastfeeding, my brother \"took one for the family\"). Anyhow, fast forward to now and I just find out from my parents that this woman has been abusing the oldest (yanking hair and hitting, plus verbal intimidation) since my niece was 14 (she's 17 now). She (ex sister-in-law) also just kicked her (my niece) out of the house after a recent argument over something that seemed superficial to me. AND, I was told that she is starting to get abusive towards the middle niece who is 15, but has so far spared the youngest. My family is afraid that if they call the cops or social services that this woman might find a way to turn the situation to her favor. She has in the past.  She has a lawyer and has managed to get a court order -- for absolutely no reason -- to keep my new sister-in-law from watching the kids when my brother isn't around. I've heard about this woman's antics before, but this is the first time I have  heard about the abuse. Is there anything I can do?", "summary": "my chemically imbalanced ex-sister-in-law is abusing my nieces but she has custody and my family is afraid that if they call the police or social services, it will backfire on them."}
{"id": "t3_19pvjv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Deploying to Afghanistan, not sure what I should do with my relationship of almost 2 years.", "post": "Hey Reddit, I am 20M and she is 20F and we have been dating for about 2 years now. I am a soldier in the army and I am currently looking at a deployment in less than a year for 9 months. I joined the army while I was with her and she waited for me while I was gone for 4 months during OSUT. While I was gone she said it was the hardest thing she has ever had to deal with and she was completely miserable, but she managed to stick through it. I've mentioned my pending deployment recently and she doesn't even want to talk about it and ends up crying, she says she doesn't know if she can last that long without me. I am the kind of person where I need to bring things up and communicate issues in order to resolve them and she is the type of person that prefers to ignore it until you can't really ignore it anymore. Although she is like this it doesn't prevent us from being good at communication, we are usually pretty honest with each other. I feel like if we keep pushing off this subject that it wont be good when it comes time for me to leave for 9 months. At the moment our relationship isn't completely stable and I am not sure if withholding this will help when it comes time to depart.", "summary": "Supposed to deploy soon, gf refuses to discuss the topic, relationship isn't completely stable at the moment what can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1bzruk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Another customer service FAIL from Cocks Communications. Reddit: does anyone out there work for a cable company? Why do they all seem to suck at customer service?", "post": "After clicking around on the website for Cocks Communications and reaching multiple 404 errors for the gazillionth time (the \"pay your bill\" links always work flawlessly, of course), I sent this brief communique:\n\n*Why do so many of your links go to 404's? It's been like this forever. \nIt's as if you don't know about the problem or don't care. If you don't \nknow about the problem, maybe it's the TWELVE required fields a customer\nhas to fill out just to send you an email (like this). You should make \nit easier to contact your company... if you care about feedback. What \nthe hell am I saying? You're Cox. You don't care at all. It shows in \neverything you do. Why am I bothering to write this?*\n\nThe crack customer service team over at Cocks Communications sent me this remarkably unhelpful response (text wall ahead): \n\n*Thank you for your e-mail. I understand you are currently experiencing \nconnectivity difficulties. I am sincerely sorry for this inconvenience.*\n\n*Under these circumstances, it is somewhat effortful to determine the \ncause of your connectivity issue, since we are not able to troubleshoot \nyour computer directly. You might encounter isolated hardware \ndifficulties on your end, not visible from our side. I suggest you \nperform cable modem troubleshooting, by accessing the link below:*\n\n*<snip 3 pages of utterly useless advice>", "summary": "I send Cocks Communications a complaint about broken links on their site, and they send me a pre-fabbed text wall about checking my modem's connectivity. Why are cable companies like this?"}
{"id": "t3_1bah9i", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Lady needs guy advice", "post": "I'm the type that usually goes from long-term relationship to long-term relationship without much dating in between.  I'm trying out the casual dating thing for a while. I am 26f, above average attractiveness (in my opinion, but i still have pretty low confidence). \n\nSo, someone told this guy (pretty much a stranger to me, we only met in passing), that i thought he was cute and he gave my friend his phone number to give to me.  So the next day I texted him, and we have texted a couple of times for a few days. Seems like we have some things in common. \n\nAfter the 3rd day, I asked him if he wanted to grab a drink sometime...no response. I find it hard to believe that in 24 hours he hadn't used his phone.\n\nWhy would he give me his number, have good back and forth texts, then leave me hanging when I ask to chat in person? Just not that into me?", "summary": "A guy gave me his number, we had good text chats, then he fell off the face of the earth when I ask to get a drink. What gives?"}
{"id": "t3_3qoczv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The girl(24F) I (25M) have been seeing for about a month just lost a good friend of hers and I don't know how to console her and she's becoming distant.", "post": "I met a girl a little over a month ago and I really like her. We have been seeing each other often and text during most days quite a bit. It seems like we were getting pretty close and she invited me on a trip with her that's in a week.\n\nA few days ago she found out that one of her good friends had passed away and I don't know how to be there for her better. I think that it's causing her to become distant from me and even though it hasn't been very long, I don't want to lose her.\n\nIn the past 4 years I have lost my father and my grandmother, so I understand what it feels like to lose, but don't know how to help someone else in that situation. When I think about it, I feel like there is nothing I can do but give her space, but feel that will only increase the distance I've been feeling.\n\nI don't want to mention the way I feel because it's selfish, and really I just want to be able to support her emotionally in a time like now.\n\nAny advice is greatly appreciated. Thank you.", "summary": "A girl I have been seeing for a short time just lost a good friend and I don't know how to be emotionally supportive for her, but want to be and need advice on how to be."}
{"id": "t3_2jzljg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28M] with my mother [62F]: dispute over new employee (22?F)", "post": "My mother owns a small apparel boutique and I work there as manager. We also employ four shop girls. Recently one of the women who works for us asked for two weeks off because her daughter was having a baby and she wanted to be there to support her. Unfortunately, this time coincided with my mother being out of town for a week. I expected to pick up the extra hours myself.\n\nWithout consulting me AT ALL (which I think is out of line because I'm the manager), my mother hires New Girl as a temp employee. By all accounts, New Girl is a great employee. She had no previous experience in retail, but she learned quickly and her first week I had a handful of customers seek me out specifically to compliment her. That's great, we love to hear that sort of thing.\n\nThe end of her temp employment is coming up, when my mother mentions she wants to bring New Girl on permanently. I tell her we don't have room in the schedule (because we don't, we'd have to cut everyone's hours severely to accommodate her). My mother says we can fire another shop girl, a high schooler who has been with us about six months. She says that from purely a numbers standpoint, New Girl makes more sales.\n\nI am against this. I can't believe she's being this disloyal to her own staff. I also take issue with New Girl's appearance. She simply does not look the level of polished as the other women we employ. I asked her once if she wore make up and she told me she was wearing make up then, but in my opinion it is not enough. I also learned that she does not use heat products in her hair. This has never been a problem with our other employees, and I have no idea how to address this, because how do you tell a woman she needs to wear more make up? My mother doesn't mind, but she's always been more bohemian, which is fine but not the look I care to have represented at our boutique.\n\nFrankly, I think my mother is allowing personal feelings to get in the way of professionalism. She seems dead set on this, though. I need a new way to approach her on this subject.", "summary": "Mother wants to fire employee to make room for new employee. I'm against this and we have come to an impasse. How do I smooth over the situation and solve the dispute?"}
{"id": "t3_2kwia3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my friend [17 F], dilemma", "post": "Hey /relationships, just a question about where to go with my situation.\n\nI'm a senior in high school, and single after a rough breakup with someone I was very attached to. \n\nMy friend, (S), helped me through the breakup, was supportive and listened to my unhappiness. \n\nI heard through a mutual friend that S was interested in 'hooking up' (vague high school terms) with me. \n\nI'm conflicted. S is an attractive, funny and smart person and under normal circumstances I wouldn't hesitate to engage in 'activities' with her, but since there's an emotional/very friendly connection between us I'm worried about ruining a friendship. \n\nI was assured by the mutual friend that S doesn't want to mess up the friendship either, but she is still very into hooking up.\n\nWhat do? I don't want to offend S by denying any advances she might make, but I'm a horny and lonesome teenaged boy.\n\nThanks for taking the time to read this, I'm sure you could be spending it doing something more productive.", "summary": "my friend is interested in a sexual relationship with me, some emotional baggage exists and I don't want to upset a friendship"}
{"id": "t3_1yuwx8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24f] with bf [26m] of 8 months, uncomfortable with him going to a strip club (see more info inside)", "post": "Hi Reddit, \n\nWell the title says it all: I am uncomfortable with my man going to a strip club. While I have no issues with him watching porn, it makes me uncomfortable at the thought of him going to a strip club. I have gone to a SC a few times, and each time I was danced upon and so were the men in my group. This makes me uncomfortable. \n\nMy bf is going for a bachelor party, and he hasn't seen this friend for a couple years. I told him that I was uncomfortable with him going but that I was not going to stop him if he wanted to go. \n\nThe party is this Friday. \n\nTo complicate things further (in my mind), is the fact that we have been having an issue in the bedroom lately. Mainly, my libido is higher than his, and he has turned down sex twice in the last two weeks. We have sex a decent amount, but he initiates less and less and it makes me feel unattractive. Last night I initiated sex, and when I went down on him he went completely \"dead fish\" on me. When I asked him what was wrong he said he was \"hoping to get into it, but that he wasn't into it yet.\" This was after I had been rubbing and teasing him for almost 15 minutes and been sucking him off for a couple of minutes. \n\nWe have talked about our difference in sex drives a couple of times, and he swears to me that he is \"insanely attracted\" to me and that he just \"doesn't want sex all the time.\" (He has had two LTR, and in both sex dwindled to about once a month by the end of it.) \n\nSo, I guess I am just trying to reconcile him wanting to go to a strip club and see other naked women when he doesn't want to pay attention to the one he has at home. It's bothering me a lot.", "summary": "My boyfriend is going to a strip club at the same time our sex life is dwindling. I feel unattractive due to the changes in our sex life."}
{"id": "t3_24zds9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my Fianc\u00e9 [22 M] of 1.5 years, I am really jealous of him graduating", "post": "First off, my fianc\u00e9 and I are getting married in 2 weeks, and I am really excited about it. \n\nWe are both seniors and college and he is graduating on Saturday. Two weeks ago, I found out I have to take a summer class to graduate and I don't get to walk for graduation (we go to different schools). I am really proud and happy for him and I want to be there to see him graduate, but I feel AWFUL when I think about graduations in general because I don't get to have mine. Basically a bureaucratic school thing is forcing me to delay my graduation and I have to pay for one more class to meet the hour requirement. I am taking the class now, and I am feeling so burnt out and upset that I don't get to enjoy graduation or have a bit of a break from four years of intense science study (luckily the class is an easy one, so it is a bit of a break in itself).\n\nI am trying to be positive and supportive, and obviously I am proud of him, but I am DREADING going to his graduation. I am so jealous of him that he is done and he gets to enjoy the end of college and celebrate his graduation with his family, while I am stuck in summer school and don't have the opportunity to walk until next summer. I feel like I am withdrawing from him quite a bit, which is scary because we're getting married so soon. I know this is a personal problem of mine, and I don't him to suffer because I can't get over myself.\n\nI know that being a good partner means celebrating your partners successes as if they were your own, but I am having such a hard time doing this. And I feel awful thinking about going to his graduation and watching him walk. I am so afraid I will still have these selfish jealous feelings and I don't want to have them then. PLEASE give me some advice here; I am going crazy!", "summary": "I won't get to finish school until the end of May and I won't get to walk for graduation until next year, and I am incredibly jealous of my soon-to-be husband who is graduating on Saturday"}
{"id": "t3_3g0wfj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21M] relationship isn't healthy. I'm happy with it, and I think my partner [M21] is too. But I worry about the future and other outcomes.", "post": "Let be start off by saying that I'm a positive person. I'm pretty much always in a good mood, always positive, but I worry a lot. It's not healthy I know, but it keeps me on my toes.\n\nMy boyfriend has issues, a lot of mental problems, depression mostly, and the fact that he cannot believe a single compliment. Even from me. He deserves compliments, I compliment on his uni work (he's doing physics), and other general things.\n\nOnto myself. I don't like being alone, I hate it. A relationship for me is something rewarding, but it's also my safety net. I rely on whoever my partner is to make me feel safe. Just being in a relationship makes be feel safer.\n\nAnd my partner helps me with a lot. I'm forgetful; so he helps me remember, I have terrible work ethic when it comes to study; so he encourages me.\n\nIn return I work (sneakily) on his mental health and encourage him a lot. His happiness is paramount to me, and so is his well-being.\n\nRecently he's been talking about how he might be better alone, and letting me know that he hopes that we will be friends no matter what happens in the future.\n\nHe says that he doesn't want this to end, and I believe him, I truly do. But if it does I am terrified beyond all other. I don't know how he's going to do if we aren't us. I know I'll fall to pieces and such. Everything is going so good right now I'm terrified about the future.\n\nI don't want this to end, I want to help him, and I want us to grow together. But I don't know if that will happen, and I'm just full of uncertainty.", "summary": "I'm worried about my relationships future. I want to do what's right and I think I am. But now I'm not sure what's best."}
{"id": "t3_3zu7zo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] I have been together for a little over a year, i still get compared against her ex", "post": "So me and my girlfriend have been in a relationship for over a year now. It never fails that when a deep topic comes up and I try to support her and help her the best way I can it isn't good enough and I feel like she compares me to her ex at these times.\n\nJust so you have a idea her past relationship lasted for 4 years, they broke up because she didn't trust him after he smoked weed once and she held it against him for the duration of the relationship & they fought a lot supposedly. As a idea to why I say she compares us is we had a conversation recently about her parents because they might be getting a divorce.\n\nI tried to comfort her by saying positive things and reassuring her. But she said I wasn't being sympathetic enough compared to someone that has dealt with this like her ex. Because I guess her ex's parents had a divorce also while they were together in that past relationship.\n\nI just need some help as in what should I do, I have told her many times when I feel like she is comparing me against him. I tell her I do not like to be compared but it hasnt stopped. I Feel like because I don't have certain experiences I had to deal with in life she thinks I don't know what I am saying.\n\nWhat should I do to get this stop or is this just a lost cause at this point?", "summary": "I have been together for a little over a year, i still get compared against her ex - What should I do to get this stop or is this just a lost cause at this point?!"}
{"id": "t3_1glz5b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[26M] with my girlfriend [32F] of over 5 years-I can't get over the trivial age difference...", "post": "I've been with my beautiful girlfriend for over 5 years now, and I could honestly say that I am deeply in love with her. I've never felt so loved and happy before, and I believe that I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Our sex life is out of this world, and I can't keep up with her, and we also have a really deep emotional connection. I'm about to ask her to marry me, however, I'm suddenly feeling really hesitant and I think it's because she's 6 years older than me...\n\nMy girlfriend has always been a lot less mature than me, and I think that stems from the fact that she lived a very sheltered life. I was also her first real boyfriend, and she lost her virginity to me. She also looks about 10 years younger than she is, and people are always amazed that she's older than me. In essence, I've always felt like the older, and more mature person in our relationship. We are also in the same place career wise, and we both discussed wanting to have kids in about 3-4 years from now. \n\nDespite this, though, I can't help but worry about our age difference...It feels nonexistent now, but I worry that It'll be evident in the future...At times I think that 6 years is such a small age gap and that my worries are incredibly immature and nonsensical. But at times I feel that our 6 year age difference is something to worry about, maybe not now, but in the future...\n\nI am deeply in love with this girl, and I've never been so physically and emotionally attracted to someone before. I'm about to ask her for marriage, but I can't get rid of the nagging thought that she's older than me.\n\nAm I crazy? Is a 6 year age difference really that big of a deal among adults?", "summary": "I'm about to ask my beautiful girlfriend to marry me, but lately I can't get over the fact that she's 6 years older than me. Are my concerns unjustified?"}
{"id": "t3_4wdkmh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I made plans without his consent", "post": "I have been seeing this guy for about 6-7 months now and I feel things are going well between us considering we both have busy lives. We probably see each other at least once a week because I have two jobs that require a lot of my time. \nWhen we do have time together, its usually just watch a movie / make love. \nWe are both adults in our late 20's. \nRecently I have received 2 free tickets to SeaWorld and I asked him if he would be interested in going with me and we can schedule a day off together and go for a change of pace. \nMind you I asked him in a text because its the easiest way for us to communicate. \nHis reply was \"Yeah sure possibly,  but I don't know.\"\nOn that note he told me he used to work there a long time ago, which I did not know being that it was the first time for me to hear that from him. \nWhen I was claiming the free tickets online, it asked for 2 names to claim the tickets. I didn't want to leave it sitting on my phone and knew that it would probably clock it out for being idle so I went ahead and put my name and his on both tickets.\nWhen I told him I did this in a text, his reply was \"Omfg.\"\n\nShould I have not put this kind of pressure on him? I feel bad now :l", "summary": "I goofed and made plans for my boyfriend and myself to go to Seaworld when he didn't completely know if he wanted to. Now I think he's mad at me. Thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_150kp0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[M24] am dating an woman[F19] and friend's with an an ex's family.", "post": "I have seen a lot of posts on here about being the ex-gf in these situations, and none of them are too positive on the bf.  \n\nWhat are your thoughts on not only having both of these relationships, but the fact that they will likely meet each other? I do not see/associate with the ex-gf at all, but am very close to everyone else (brothers[8,14,22], father[42], mother[41]). It is probable we'll hang out and do things together in the future, without the ex[f25]. \n\nIs this a receipt for disaster and I'm just not seeing it? People around me haven't been able to properly describe why this would or wouldn't end well. Just that \"it's...\" with no follow-up. Am I worried about nothing?", "summary": "Friend's with an ex's family, especially mother, and they've all shown interest in wanting to meet my new gf. I have no contact with the ex."}
{"id": "t3_217444", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] and a girl [20F], been talking for a few months. Just found out she has a boyfriend??? Help.", "post": "A very quick backstory..\n\nI met a girl about 10 months ago and we talked for about an hour but never got any contact info. I never saw her again until a few months ago, where she remembered me somehow and we exchanged numbers.\n\nWe've been friendly/flirtacious, and feel very comfortable and connected to each other.\n\nWe hung out the other week and I kissed her. She started crying and saying \"you're going to hate me\" and admitted she had been seeing someone for about 6 months. She says she felt so shocked when I came back into her life and basically has been falling for me and didn't know what to do. \n\nShe says she feels like shit because the guy she's with is a \"nice guy\", but she feels strongly for me. I told her she needs to choose and she says she knows.\n\nShe still hasn't broken up with him, nor stopped talking to me. \n\nI'm confused and a little hurt. I was hoping you could answer some questions for me.\n\nIs it possible that she really likes me and this is some rare case? She told me she never cheated before and now she feels horrible and doesn't know what to do because he's nice and all, but she really wants to be with me too? \n\nShould I just keep stressing that she has to make a choice? \nIt's painful because she and I honestly get along so well and feel like we've known each other forever/etc... literally perfect situation other than the other guy. \n\nShould I just say \"if you want to be with me, then break up with him first\"? And then how do I know she won't cheat on me? She doesn't seem like that kind of person and is brutally honest with me about her past and stuff.. so I think it's really a one time thing, but I'm cautious. \n\nHas anyone had an experience where they fell for someone else while in a relationship and it turned out alright?", "summary": "Girl and I want to be together, she has a BF, scared to break up with him because \"he's nice\". What do I do."}
{"id": "t3_3gbib8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do girls that say they \"just want to play around/the field\" etc, really mean it?", "post": "There's this girl [26] who is out of a 2 year relationship where her ex was cheating on her. It's been about 5 months.  \n  \nI've [27/m] had a few nights with her, we chatted a bit about what she wants etc, and I've not said I want a relationship (though she might have interpreted this) and she's basically said she just wants to \"kiss all the boys\" or flirt with everyone now that's she's single.  \n  \nShe's still flirting with me, and definitely conflicted as to what she wants as we may have a plan to have a night together but then all of a sudden it's called off (not in a beating round the bush way, just \"I think this may complicate things so it may not be a good idea\" way.)  \n  \n\nI'm at wits end with what to do - tell her I really like her and would like to keep hanging out, with no expectations of a relationship or anything more serious than being friends who've shared a few nights together... or walk away and close the door on anything happening, i.e. stop flirting and just be friends.    \n  \nWe had planned to talk about this since the last time it was called off, but neither of us have raised a time or place to discuss it.  \n  \nI feel like bringing the issue up etc puts me in a bad position and may make her want to avoid me.  I'd really appropriate any insight or thoughts on the matter.", "summary": "Hooked up with a friend who continues to flirt with me but says she doesn't want a relationship but wants to \"kiss all the boys\". what do?"}
{"id": "t3_juw5g", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can someone please help me fix my micro SD card?", "post": "Ok so here's the situation. I got a nook color and I liked it. Then I got the SanDisk SD card for it, an 8gig card.\n\nThen I experimented with Nook honey or whatever it was called, and it worked fine, put in the card and the nook boots into nook honey. Then I took the card out and put it away so I could boot the nook up normally. \n\nSo the nook gets full and I decide I want to wipe the card and just use it as normal for now. And.. I pop it in and it says \"boot\" and it's only 117mb. I tried to reformat it and it still says it's only 113mb usable. This is an 8 gig card.", "summary": "I turned an 8gig microSD card into a 113mb card, how can I fix the card back to new?"}
{"id": "t3_348tm2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She ended it", "post": "So my girlfriend (17f) of about 10 months ended it tonight. It was the best relationship I(18m) could ever ask for. She has been dealing with issues regarding her sexuality and with a therapist ultimately decided she needed to be alone for a while. And I understand and support her. I want to remain good friends with her and she says the same. How do we go about this and how do I feel better? I'm not mad at her. I'm just very upset that it had to end. She was one of my best friends during the relationship and I don't want that to change.", "summary": "best girlfriend i could ever ask for dumps me on good terms for self discovery. We both really wanna be friends still. What's the nest course of action?"}
{"id": "t3_4p8xqe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 /F] interested on my surf instructor [22] was he interested or not?", "post": "So let's just say that I ended up catching feelings for my surfing instructor. We aren't even far in age he is only 2 years younger than me- in a way,  it's a little of a little set back for me because i feel like a cougar. But anyways, our time spent together during our surf session is ALWAYS AMAZING! I really felt the connection with him, I could totally see him being both my best friend and a boyfriend. \n\nHe's very encouraging and even went out of his way to make sure I got it all in my camera since i'm so into photography and stuff. This Sunday our session is done and so I texted him 2 days later. \n\nAt first it was about surfing. I sent him a copy of our surfing that he recorded.I was flirting  a bit too with my texting while keeping the surf aspect of it (if you guys know what I mean) He was going along with it so I then tried to geared it away from the surf topic and I finally said, \"Curious, what are you doing right now?\"\n\nHis response: I'm just hanging about to hit the hay soon, got surfing class tomorrow! \nHe didn't even asked about what I was up to, or initiated anything else", "summary": "what do you guys think? I mean if you were a guy wouldn't that be a chance to keep the convo with the girl going?"}
{"id": "t3_1hen3r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend [20F] wants to buy a pricey bit of jewelry and it's affecting me [21M] more than it should.", "post": "We both have vacations coming up in the next few months. I'm going to India, she's going to America. She doesn't have much money saved up and I know her holiday is going to be a splurge and shopping spree at best, and I'm fine with that. However, she recently received a large bonus from her work, to the sum of about $3,000. I told her it'd be smart to pay off her debt and use the rest as savings for her trip, but I know she's already spent a few hundred on clothing and has bought me a gift as well. Now she keeps mentioning this ring she's interested in, it's about $400 and to me it looks just like any other ring but I guess that's just because I'm a guy.\n\nThis is affecting me way more then it should, I know I have a right to be mad in that she's being financially irresponsible. But it feels like the tip of the iceberg in a line of things that have being happening in our relationship. I think with me psyching myself up for India and knowing what it's like over there, it's got me thinking how much $400 could do, but instead it's just going towards a small round piece of metal?\n\nIt's got me thinking about the future quite a bit, will it always be like this? Shes always known about my plans of extensive travel and volunteering in the future and wants to be apart of them with me, but she's showing no signs of it. Her eyes light up when she sees the next best thing in the shop or on tv, and I could not care less about anything like that. Surely I'm overreacting right?", "summary": "Girlfriend wants $400 ring but has more important things to spend the money on, has got me really worried about our financial future together."}
{"id": "t3_105aw8", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Just bought my first puppy and I'm completely clueless as to why she is acting the way she is.", "post": "I've always owned cats but in the last week I have bought an 8 week yorkshire terrier. She really didn't seem to suffer separation anxiety from being taken away from her litter mates and has settled into the household lovely\n\nThe thing that's confusing me is I don't work and am in the house with her all day. Playing with her, looking after her and spoiling her rotten. Yet she seems to be much more interested in visitors and my son when he comes in from school. Ok, so i imagine that could be because she sees me all day. The thing I find extremely upsetting is that when I let her out of her crate in the morning and say hello to her she crawls towards me on her tummy and seems scared. Shes not shaking but the crawling seems a bit strange. I've definitely never ever hurt her neither deliberately or accidentally and I would love some insight as to why shes behaving this way.", "summary": "8 week old puppy crawls on her belly army style to greet me but doesn't do it to anyone else. Why?"}
{"id": "t3_3d9xcm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23F] and my cousin [23F] have the same due date. She just lost her baby today at 36 weeks. How do I comfort her?", "post": "My cousin and I (both 23 F) have been very close most of our lives. We grew up together and have a good relationship. Well we both got pregnant at the same time. We have the exact same due date (August 7th). This is my second pregnancy (I have a 2 year old son) and it's her first. We were excited that our kids were going to grow up together and always compared bellies. \n\nShe texted me yesterday saying that she was worried because the baby wasn't moving. She went in and they found a heart beat and decided to send her in for a stress test. I just got a phone call from our grandmother saying that she had lost the baby. \n\nMy heart is completely broken for her. I want so badly to be there for her and grieve with her but I'm not sure how. I don't want to make her uncomfortable. How can I show my support without upsetting her?", "summary": "My cousin and I have the same due date and are set to give birth August 7th. She lost her baby today. How do I comfort her?"}
{"id": "t3_mejh0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, have you ever saved someone's life or had an otherwise heroic moment? Brag here.", "post": "I'll start. \n\nOne particularly hot Florida summer day (105+ F) my mom had picked me up from day camp and we set out to do some errands when we saw a red pickup weaving in and out of traffic. The driver was swerving all over the place, half in the other lane (2 lane highway), generally being reckless. It made its way a good bit ahead of us, angering basically every surrounding driver in the process, and then pulled over onto the shoulder of the road. My mom and I glared as we drove by only to see the driver crouched over, clutching his head in agony. We quickly pulled off the road, along with another driver, and tried to talk to the man but he just mumbled incoherently and was largely disoriented. He then got out of his truck and began to stumble into traffic, ignoring the other person offering him some water. He managed to cross the road, but by the time we could get across and follow him, he was nowhere to be found. We called the cops anyway, and waited for them to arrive and gave a statement and our contact information. Then we went about our errands, as we thought they had it under control. About 45 minutes later, we drive by the same spot on the way home and see the fire truck still there. We stopped to speak to them and they told us they couldn't find the guy and were about to leave, so my mom, being super thorough at everything she does, decided we should just drive through the surrounding neighborhoods and give it one more look, just in case and lo and behold, there he is passed out under a tree in someone's front yard. We let the cops know and they came and got him. Fast forward a few hours and one of the initial responders called to tell us that the man was a diabetic and his blood sugar had been dangerously low and he was slipping into a coma when we found him. Had we not spotted him, it's likely he would have died in the heat and then he thanked us for helping out. Made 11 year old me glow with pride all day.", "summary": "Asshole driver turned out to be having major health problem, after he wandered off, I found him when the cops couldn't and he got medical treatment and lived. "}
{"id": "t3_22cgeg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've put myself in a corner and don't know what to do", "post": "There's this guy (m18) who I've (f17) been chasing for 5 years. I've had a few boyfriends over that timespan who I've left because I just can't get over this one guy. Over the last year, we've become best friends and hang out all the time. The thing is, he has a girlfriend now. His girlfriend absolutely hates me because he would rather hang out with me than her. He has talked about breaking up with her with me, but I don't know if I should take the chance to try and make something more of our friendship. \n\nBut here's where the tricky part is. I feel like I've sent off the wrong signals to him, as in the friend zone. I'm scared that when I tell him how I feel, he'll be very shocked and tell me that he hasn't ever felt the same way. Another thing, I've recently dated his best friend. I'm not sure if his group of friends have a \"guy code,\" but it's a possible assumption. \n\nI just don't know what to do at all. I've been stuck for so long now and I feel like I need to finally figure out what's going on between us. I have no idea how to approach the issue or if I ever even should. Please and thank you for the help, Reddit!", "summary": "I've been in love with my best friend for 5 years but don't know how to tell him how I feel."}
{"id": "t3_azdny", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Please help reddit! Someone is trying to take my identity.", "post": "Recently, I have been getting random Facebook messages from people whom I've never spoken to before. It started off with someone messaging me and saying that they've spoken to me before and have viewed a craigslist ad that \"I\" have put up. So after doing some more investigating, it seems that someone has made a Photobucket using my information, and getting pictures off my Facebook and MySpace. They have also made a craigslist ad, posting these pictures up, and telling them to contact \"me\" via AIM with the screen name \"ravergirl1991\".\n\nThe craigslist ad has been flagged for removal, so before I was able to see anything that was posted, it was flagged. All the information I know is based off of what the person who messaged me via Facebook had told me. \n\nNow, people I do not know are messaging me nonstop, and some of the messages have been threatening, and now I fear for my safety, even out in public. I have no idea who would do this to me, nor why.\n\nSo all I have now is the Photobucket account whomever made to take my identity and to put me out there. Given the photobucket account, would anyone be able to do anything?\n\nSo please reddit! Is there anything that anyone can do, such as find an IP address or trace it somehow? Every little thing, no matter how small, would be much obliged", "summary": "someone is trying to be \"me\", taking my pictures and posting them on a website, speaking to other people pretending to be me, I feel like I'm in danger."}
{"id": "t3_4k27ds", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27F] found a naked picture of my husband [27M] that someone else took", "post": "My husband and I have been together since college. I was going through old pictures on our computer and I found this one naked picture of him from years ago. It's a picture of him standing there, dick in one hand, trying to grab the camera with the other, in the middle of saying something. It was obviously taken by someone. I can't figure out where it is because the flash was on the the room behind him in the pictures is dark. I know that we were together when the photo was taken because he wasn't that muscular before we started dating. \n\nI asked him about it and he swears that I took the picture and it was taken in our old apartment. I know it was a long time ago but I am certain that I didn't take the picture. There's no metadata for me to see what kind of camera it was taken on or anything so it's just his word against mine. From the size of the photo I can assume it was taken on his old digital camera because it matches up with other pictures he has from then. I also barely ever used his camera because I liked mine more. \n\nIt's been bothering me a lot and I can't stop thinking about it. I asked him last night if it's possible anyone saw him naked and took a picture and he said no at first but later said that maybe his old college friend (who is a woman) took it when he was changing, but he doesn't remember if he was ever naked around her. It seems very clear to me that he wasn't changing in that photo, he has a huge boner and is holding it. And even if he was just changing, why would he be doing that in front of her? \n\nI used to be so insecure about their friendship because she seemed like she was really into him but he swore nothing ever happened between them so I eventually learned to live with it. They don't talk anymore because we moved away. \n\nEverything is telling me that something is off here but I have no way of finding out so I'm really upset. Does this seem off to anyone else?", "summary": "I found a naked picture of my husband on our computer that I didn't take, he swears I did and said its possible that his \"friend\" took it when he was changing."}
{"id": "t3_2ycy6d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Update: My (16/f) friends dad (50s?/m) has been coming onto me really aggressively and I'm very very uncomfortable around him.", "post": "Original:\n\nYesterday morning, I talked to one of my sisters and told her about everything and showed her texts.  Luckily she believed me and I asked her not to tell our parents because I wanted to just tell my mom but hadn't had a moment alone with her enough to tell her.\n\nLater that day my friend, his dad and his dads wife came over to our house and I had to walk past him for something and he put his arm around my shoulder in a \"joking\" way and when I pushed him off he acted really hurt and pretended he had no idea why I would react that way. My sister saw and heard what he was saying and confronted him about everything in front of everyone. \n\nOf course he denied it and said that I was the one who started flirting with him and hitting on him. Then my dad came into it and things escalated really really quickly. He and my dad were arguing and he made a comment to my dad about how it was my parents fault overall for raising a slut who thought it was okay to lead older men on and my dad hit him and they started fighting (why I didn't want to tell my dad). They threatened to press charges against my dad for it, but I'm not sure if they actually did or actually will since nothing has happened yet. \n\nLater last night after things had calmed down some,  my parents and I talked and I told them what all had happened and showed them the texts and they said that they would see what they could do about it. \n\nUltimately I'm happy that it came out and that I won't have to deal with it anymore, but I really wished that it had t happened like that because now my dad may get arrested/go to jail and that's specifically what I was trying to avoid.", "summary": "I told my sister who told everyone and my dad got into a fight after I was called a slut, but hasn't been arrested yet."}
{"id": "t3_23fm7c", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "My girlfriends dog was housebroken and now keeps pooping in the house.", "post": "My girlfriends dog, who I used to love, has seemingly forgotten that he can't poop in the house. He was completely housebroken and then started to have really runny poops in the house so we just figured he was sick (we accidentally bought the wrong food) and didn't yell at or scold him because it wasn't really his fault. After he has gotten better he just thinks he can poop in the house now. For instance, not 20 minutes ago my girlfriend took him for a walk and he did not poop because there was other dogs outside and he gets distracted amazingly easily, then she brought him inside, left him in the bedroom where I was sleeping and he pooped. I noticed about 5 minutes after she left when I rolled out of bed. He was so excited when I got out of bed too; he didn't even act guilty like he knew he did something wrong. \n\nThis is just frustrating me so much because he used to go to the door and everything when he had to go and now it's just a free for all. Help. Please.", "summary": "girlfriends dog used to be housebroken and now isn't and doesn't seem to know it's wrong to do that anymore"}
{"id": "t3_2kauk9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my...idk [19 F] Just not sure what to do.", "post": "Went on vacation 1 1/2 years ago\n\nMet an amazing girl\n\nSpent a lot of time together\n\nHad to leave\n\nWe had agreed it would be ok to see other people\n\nBut we keep in contact and talk about how much we miss each other all the time\n\nStill have feelings for her\n\nShe just entered a relationship recently\n\nIt bothers me\n\nIdk if I should tell her how I feel or if I am just idealizing something we had and should move on.", "summary": "Still have feelings for someone, never really had closure, they're with someone else, should I tell them how I feel."}
{"id": "t3_462prs", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by taking a nap", "post": "So like all other TIFU this didnt happen today. I did have one last night about me ripping my pants at work and exposing my junk but thats a story for another time. \n\nThis story goes back about 2 years ago while I was still in High School. I loved the movie Ted.\n\nThe summer before starting my senior year I travel to go stay with my sister and her family. My sister has three kids between the ages of 3-7. \n\nOne day I am tired as hell while the kids are playing so I tell my sister Im going to go lay down for a few (the kids playroom is across from my room I was staying in), and if they needed anything to just wake me up.\n\nI turn on my playstation and start up my Ted UNRATED edition, and fall asleep. I was woken up about 45 minutes late from my nieces sitting on the bed with the youngest trying to do makeup on me (which she succeeded in doing). I then ask them to leave the room that this is a bad movie, turns out their mom thought instead of sleeping, I decided to play and watch a movie with them.\n\nFast forward about 2 weeks, we all travel to my house in two different cars in a downpour. Im in the car ahead of them just passing through Richmond when my phone goes off, I answer the call from my sister screaming at me saying what the fuck did I let them watch? I asked what she was talking about and it turns out the middle child during the thunder storm starting singing the fucking Thunder buddies song with yes you guessed it \"FUCK YOU THUNDER YOU CAN SUCK MY DICK\".\n\n My nieces now all claim we are thunder buddies though", "summary": "fell asleep watching Ted, nieces watched it, sang the thunder buddies song and told the thunder to suck a dick."}
{"id": "t3_2ufn7n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my GF [19 F] of 2.3 years. She slept in the bed with a guy friend", "post": "Hi /r/relationships I need some help. My girlfriend and I have been dating for a little over 2 years. She lives in a dorm at a Uni and I live off campus at the same Uni. \n\nAnyways she has some guy friends that I don't like. One guy in particular, but I don't let it bother me too much. Anyway, he came up for the weekend to hangout with her and do some other stuff, and at the end of the night, they slept in the same bed together.\n\nI feel uncomfortable about this. Is it something I should feel uncomfortable about? She is just friends with him, but I know if he got the chance, he would probably sleep with her.", "summary": "Girlfriend slept in the same bed with a guy friend. I feel uncomfortable. Should I be feeling this? Am I being a pansy or what?"}
{"id": "t3_36kxlj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (21f) boyfriend (27m) is still living with his ex girlfriend(28ish?) but says there are no issues... am I crazy?", "post": "I really connect with this guy and I have been in a few relationships before where I have been cheated on. But I honnestly just don't think that is what's going on. He has 2 roommates his ex, and my old boss(28m) ironically.\nShe acts like a cool person when he is in the room and all but when he is gone for a bit she always has some smart ass comment, like a joke about how much he Jacks off, or how \"gay\" he is and it just pisses me the fuck off. He wants us to get along because he has known her for 14 years and she is like a best friend.\nAnytime I try to talk about where he is going to live when the lease is up he gets upset. I just don't know how I'm always wrong in this. He defends her if I say something bad about her, he only hangs out with me on weekends, he takes her out to eat with us sometimes, she knocks on his door late at night asking him to smoke with her. There are just lots of things about their friendship that makes me uncomfortable.", "summary": "I do really care for this man and the last thing I want to do is end things. But am I an idiot for letting this continue?"}
{"id": "t3_2zqqjx", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[15/m] don't know if a girl [15/f] likes me or not and when I should call/text her.", "post": "So we were both counselors in the same camp group during March Break. At the end of the week I was kind of friends with her and her friend. I got her number at the end but she seemed a little bit reluctant. During the week when we talked it seemed like we were just being polite and doing all the normal camp stuff. I also did this one magic trick to her including a proposal but she seemed to take it differently then all the other girls I've done this to (really calm). I also asked her and her friend to Tim Hortons but she seemed like she didn't really want to go and found some excuses. Even though I've only known her for five days I really like her, and I've never felt this way about a girl before. First post here so any help would be much appreciated.", "summary": "If I really really like a girl but I don't know if she likes me or not how and when should I call or text her."}
{"id": "t3_133uel", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Which to tackle first, Potty Training or Sleeping Alone?", "post": "A little bit about us and our situation: the little guy is nearly 3, my husband and I both work full time, him at home, and me out of the house. We have in-home child-care (hubby locks himself in the office during the day, only coming out for bathroom and food). \n\nSleeping: We have very recently moved, we were in a basement suite where his room was right across from ours, so if he woke he could just come to us. We now have a full house, with our room being the loft upstairs, and his room on the main floor. He hasn't slept alone for awhile (even before we moved). We had done the CIO method when he was about a year, but we grew lax and he hasn't successfully slept in his own bed for about 6 months for more than a night or two every now and then.\n\nPotty Training: He refuses the potty. We've tried giving him a smarty every time he sits on the potty, sticker charts, we ask him if he has to go, asking him to sit on the potty, buying him special underwear that he only gets if he actually goes to the bathroom in the potty. He simply doesn't want to. He sees mommy and daddy going to the bathroom, he likes to flush the toilet, he knows what it's for. When we ask him if he would like to be a big boy, and wear big boy underwear he says no. \n\nSo parenting, any tips and tricks on how to get him to sleep alone and/or go on the potty? Which one would you tackle first? I feel like doing both at the same time would be too much for him.", "summary": "Son doesn't sleep alone or go on the potty. Which would you tackle first, and how would go about these things?"}
{"id": "t3_437wsn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my husband [25 M] of one year, bedtime routine tearing us apart.", "post": "My wonderful husband and I have completely different needs when it comes to falling asleep. He needs the tv on, and I need a dark quiet room. We've tried staggering our times of going to bed, but he always ends up turning on the tv in the middle of the night, waking me up. He refuses to wear headphones or try white noise.\n\nFor almost four years now I've been letting him have the tv on, and the quality of sleep I was getting was incredibly shitty. Recently (a couple weeks ago) I told him that I couldn't handle the tv being on at night anymore. So he stopped turning it on at night. I've never had such a high quality of sleep as I've had in the last couple weeks, and he's never had such a poor quality of sleep as he's had in the last couple of weeks.\n\nI don't want to resort to sleeping in separate rooms, but I'm running out of compromises we can try. Advice?", "summary": "Husband needs tv on, I need a dark and quiet room. He won't wear headphones or try white noise. No idea what to do."}
{"id": "t3_cxsov", "subreddit": "books", "title": "Mantastic: book suggestions on feeling like a man?", "post": "R/books, hello!\n\nCan you all give me some good suggestions on fiction books that express the condition of being a guy or a man? \n\nNot books *for* men, there are plenty of lists I could go to Google for. I mean books that subtly and empathetically draw you into relating to the psyche of a man, seeing the world through a man's eyes and understanding the motivation for seeing the world and oneself this way.\n\nI want to understand the emotional repertoire and drive that lies behind 'respect', 'brotherhood', 'solidarity', 'fortitude' etc etc. Particularly, so much guy culture seems to be just that - about 'guys', a fixation on facile things with a slightly self-mocking tone.\n\n(I was brought up by my mum and inadvertently taught to find my masculinity a joke and to be ridiculed and repressed. I have long berated myself for my masculinity as 'stupid' and dangerous. I would like to change this. I have long gone to philosophy to address this but there is no feeling involved.)", "summary": "Any suggestions for truly great literature on what it *feels* like to be a man, to understand, not just books that are good for men."}
{"id": "t3_4luyo7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30F] with my ex [32M] relationship of one year, uncivil to not want to be friends", "post": "My ex and I ended things in late March, and I cut things off for good in mid-May. I don't contact him but he still reaches out from time to time.\n\nI wanted to be with him and work on our relationship. There were many things that he was unable and/or unwilling to give so I ultimately made the decision to end the relationship. He was comfortable living in a quasi-relationship state where after being together a year he was 'open to seeing other people'. This was a complete slap in the face to me and was not something that I was willing to tolerate.\n\nI've told him that I am not interested in friendship. He has friends, I have friends. We don't share but one or two mutual friends, my best friend and his best friend. While my best friend likes him, she has no interest in remaining friends with him because she does t like how he's treated me.\n\nHe's recently accused me of being uncivil because I don't care to maintain a friendship. I'm not seeing anyone else, in fact, I'm devastated at the prospect of dating again, but I still don't want to torture myself with friendship. In my mind, I know that I am respectful and civil. I am putting myself first by not desiring a friendship with someone who only wants to offer me scraps. Why do his accusations of me being uncivil bother me so much?", "summary": "Ex of one year says that I am uncivil for not wanting to maintain a friendship after breakup. Don't know why I let that get to me so much..."}
{"id": "t3_1j1b43", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I'm inexperienced and am going to hang out with the girl I have a crush on in less than 2 hours!", "post": "Okay so I (16m) am trying to make something happen with this girl (17f) who I really like.\n\nI met her through my friends who is best friends with her, and after telling her how I felt about her friend she decided she would help me on this. We've been hanging out recently with our friends included and have also messaged on Facebook a little bit, so now we are somewhat more comfortable hanging out with each other.\n\nIn an hour and a half I'm going to pick her up and take her back to my place so we can hang out, and we're going to be alone until my other two guy friends come over at an unknown time.\n\nShe's pretty outgoing for the most part and kill you with laughter with the unexpected things she does or says. In front of me she seems the same way but I can't actually tell if her behavior is different at all.\n\nCan someone please help me on what I should take about with her and how to approach the situation? Any advice would be helpful.\n\nPlease ASK ME QUESTIONS IF YOU HAVE ANY and I will be more than happy to answer them as best as I can.", "summary": "I like this girl and we're going to hang out alone for the first time at my house in just over an hour from now. Need advice!"}
{"id": "t3_1gi82v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should you break up once the high of love fades away? Gf [21F] near 2 years, tells Me [22M] I should.", "post": "My Gf tells me that she knows that I'm not in love with her because I don't show it to her, and that we should break up because it's hurting her. She is right, I've barely done a thing to show her I am.\n\nNow, the thing is that I'm sure that I began the relationship loving her, I still think that she is perfect in every way, and I want to spend the rest of my life with her, but she says that I'm only fooling myself saying all that? we've been fighting a lot lately, she's not happy in the relationship and I think it's my fault for not paying much attention to her. \n\nWe fought tonight, now I ask myself, Do I love her? if I need to ask does that means I'm not? then what? why do I like her so much then? why do I want to spend the rest of my life with her? why is this happening, and how can I fix this? \n\nHow can I make her feel so loved that this won't ever happen again?", "summary": "If the initial feeling of love you get when you really like someone fades away, does that mean you should break up?"}
{"id": "t3_3gklsj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Why would he (18 M) mirror my (19 M) body language if we've been ignoring each other?", "post": "Long story very short, we've been ignoring each other for about a month now. No argument happened; I started ignoring him, he tried getting my attention for a few weeks, I texted him why I'm ignoring him, no text back, and then he started being incredibly awkward around me every time we see each other, and now we have both been ignoring each other. \n\nHowever, yesterday was interesting. He knew I was going to go to an event in an organization we're both in with relatively few others that will show up. He came anyways, and the entire time we ignored and barely looked at each other even though we sat right across from each other. However, I noticed that he would copy a decent amount of my actions. If I looked at my phone, he would either immediately look at his as well, or look at it a few seconds later. If I crossed my arms, he would too. If I had my hands resting under my chin, he would do the same thing or at least be touching his chin. But again we barely looked at each other.\n\nI've noticed other moments of mirroring the past month too, but what exactly does this mean? I've been researching online and it just says that mirroring implies that you're having a great convo or building a great bond... But we're ignoring each other.", "summary": "we've been ignoring each other for a month, but yesterday kept mirroring my actions, mirroring means having a great convo or building a great bond but we're ignoring each other, what does this mean?"}
{"id": "t3_30t4yp", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Text/Calling etiquette... am I [36m] being overly needy with gf [31f]?", "post": "So I'm in a new(ish) relationship that has gone amazing so far.  Yesterday my grandmother passed, and since I was at the gym, I texted my gf to let her know.  She called right away to offer sympathy, but she was driving and I was working out so we agreed that I would call her when I was done.  I did that, she didn't answer (no big deal), then texted a little later to let me know she would call in an hour.  Fast forward to this morning, and she hadn't contacted me at all.  No text, no call, nothing.  I did see her when I got to work (we actually work together), and at this point I was a little upset.  I don't think she knows that, in addition to still being a little sad about my grandmother passing, I'm also upset because I think not making any effort to contact me last evening was inconsiderate.\n\nI found out that she basically got busy with errands/chores, which is fine.  Honestly, I don't even care that she didn't call.  However, I'm thinking of asking her, in the future, to at least text to let me know that she got busy with things.  The thing is, when I don't hear from her at all, all kinds of things run through my head including wondering if something happened to her.  It made it difficult for me to get to sleep.  Is a request like that overly needy? I'm trying to be \"manly\" about it, but this kind of thing does hurt my feelings and I do feel at times that she is inconsiderate toward me.", "summary": "GF didn't text or call when I was having a tough day, is it overly needy to ask for at least a text in a situation like this (or even just your average day)?"}
{"id": "t3_2u7v30", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Did she become interested?", "post": "Okay so I met this girl in my class and we talked once after class and then again before class yesterday. It felt like there was some connection because the conversation had a great back and forth. But today I came say hi to her and she was being silent and gave me one word responses then walked into class almost immediately after I got there. I have another class with her later today too so I'm worried if I keep talking I'm going to push her away even more. What's going on?? Does she not want me or just having a bad day and doesn't want to talk?", "summary": "I met a girl and we talked twice with what I thought was a good connection and now she is being silent. Is she uninterested or just having a bad day and doesn't want to talk?"}
{"id": "t3_3ryaur", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30 M] just don't know what to do anymore. Can't breakup with my grieving GF [26] of 2 years, in love with someone else, haven't told anyone and can't even talk to anyone", "post": "Ok, there's a lot going on here.\n\nI'm starting to wonder if I ever really loved my girlfriend. We just started hooking up and we're both \"nice\" people so it just grew from that. It is an \"ok\" relationship, functional and mature but there's never been much chemistry. I just feel like it's run it's course and we're not a good long term fit for living together/marriage/kids etc..\n\nI'm only really thinking about this because we've actually been quite close for the last year because her father was ill. Being supportive was the right thing to do and it's actually an easy role to do for someone you care about. He died recently and we can once again focus on each other but I find myself not really reentering the relationship or being particularly happy in the relationship. \n\nAt the same time, I've fallen in love with a new friend of a friend. We spend a lot of time together and I just click with her. She's amazing. I know she's not perfect and no one is but I can't help feeling this way (I'm not one to easily fall in love). I find myself smiling when I just think of her and she's always on my mind. I don't know how she feels at all (she's single but it's complicated) and I would never cheat on my girlfriend.\n\nMy girlfriend is still sort of recovering from her grieving process and with the holidays coming I feel like I'm trapped. I want to break up with her and I don't feel like I can as it would be so much more painful to her now. On the other hand, I feel awful that every minute I'm with her I'd rather be with this other girl or even alone.\n\nWhat should I do? I feel like I can't tell anyone because all my friends know at least one of the people. I don't want to break up with my girlfriend so soon after her father dying but I feel horrible that I love someone else and I'm not interested anymore.", "summary": "In a stale relationship but don't want to breakup with girlfriend while she's grieving for her recently deceased pop. Matters complicated by falling for someone else."}
{"id": "t3_10q9rw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Loving, balanced relationship, we're grown-ups [40 & 44] & talking living together...but we differ in values toward drug use - how can this work?", "post": "Me:  44, no gills, no pills, no voices in my head. Single parent of grown boys.  Him:  40, mostly mature, makes me laugh and has my back, NO  exceptions. We know who we are separately and, truly, love each other very much. Supportively, even where we're diffferent... We've known each other nearly 2 years and that's not \"teenager two years,\" that's 40-year-old two years.\nStill there's this big value clash:  he uses marijuana, I do not. I don't even judge that and, strongly, think it OUGHT to be legal.  But it isn't here. And, value-wise, I don't personally think drug use is a good way to go. There's all the science about stopping your emotional growth from the level you're at when you start using, tons of other things - but it's all jackshit to me. He's a full grown man who can and should make all his own decisions. In fact I admire him greatly because he does.\nBut moving in together would mean living with it in my house. Endorsing it in a way, but being legally vulnerable for it too. But most of all, even if no one else ever knows--especially my children, for whom i believe i set an example by saying what i mean and meaning what i say, and who i do not want using marijuana--i will know. \nI  believe there are far more disparate conflicts that people have overcome, learned to live with respectfully, way greater compromises made for the bigger pay off of the love we have for each other.  But I simply don't know what that looks like.  HOW is it done?  HOW does it feel?", "summary": "BF uses & likes marijuana; I do neither.  we think we want to live together and BOTH our preferences are equally important.  how do you compromise when the difference is a value like that?"}
{"id": "t3_f4wvh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Would you send something valuable to a museum for evaluation?", "post": "A friend of mine found this silver thing (looks to be a handle to something, 19th century) on the beach in Florida 40 years ago, and it's been migrating with him... It's now with him across the country and he decided to pull it out of his safe and ask around a bit.\n\nHe finally sent pictures of it to some museum folk out in Florida, and they're VERY interested it.  One of the guys said something like \"This definitely looks like it belongs in a museum\"  (Of course, my friend is spooked and is worried they're just going to keep it if he sends it to them)\n\nHe doesn't think it's going to wind up being worth millions, but he could probably sell the silver content alone for a few hundred $$.\n\nHe really wants to send it and find out what it is and how it's significant, etc...  But he doesn't want Florida to decide it's somehow state property and seize it without any options or recompense.  (The beach he found it on became a state park a year later, and you can't take stuff from a state park)\n\nHe's going to talk to some insurance folks tomorrow to see if they have any ideas, but I'm curious...\n\nWould you guys send it in, trusting that you won't get screwed?  Is there some magic document you'd get them to sign first?  Would you squirrel the thing away and play the \"what if\" game longer?\n\n-\n\nPersonally, I'd probably talk to the museum folks and try to explain my concerns, and see what they have to say, and trust that they won't screw me.  If I don't send it in, I never learn about it, and it's worthless, since it never had a value assigned to it.  If I get screwed, I'd get screwed anyway so I might as well learn something out of it.  And there's a good chance everybody ends up happy anyway.", "summary": "Would you send a potentially valuable item to a museum?  If you did, what would you do to protect your interest?  Anyone done anything like this before?"}
{"id": "t3_11jl4u", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just turned a sleazy salesman into a guilty, hopefully honest person in five minutes. What have you done that you've felt good about because you've helped others even if it cost you something?", "post": "I was filling gas watching this young, sleazy little salesman kid try to persuade other car owners to buy his car cleaning spray put out by a famous racing league. I have a bit of a flashy car so I knew it was just a matter of time before he came to me as I had a lot of gas to fill. When he came up to me, he started with the usual sleaze about how we must be cousins because we both drive BMWs. He had terrible, unprofessional skills and I'm surprised he's ever sold anything in his life if his current behavior was any indication as to how he approaches people.\n\nHe proceeded to test it on my car and, yes, it did seem to work but I just wasn't interested. Well, not until he said, \"Okay, you know what bro? I'm just gonna give you one. A can for free, on the house.\" Surprised, I walked over to the table where his setup was and also where a female coworker of his was standing and he then handed me a can and said, \"Okay, so it's only $10.\" Again, I was surprised, and instead of disputing his offer, I went ahead and pulled out my credit card and paid for it. Oh, and there was a $2 tax on the damn thing so it actually came out to $12.\n\nHe ran my card, handed me a receipt, and the transaction was over. I'm sure he felt good about having basically hustled me into walking over there under the impression that I'd get a free can and then actually making a sale. I handed him the can back and said, \"I want you to give this to the next person you promise a free can to. Now you can actually keep your word,\" and got back in my car and drove off.\n\nIt felt good doing this and I'd love to hear some stories of similar things that you may have done to help others at your cost, perhaps to prove a point or just to flat out pay it forward.", "summary": "Was promised something for free, bought it anyway and gave it back so the next person told what I was told will actually get something for free."}
{"id": "t3_1b51f3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is something that you have an emotional attachment to, and somebody tried to destroy? What have you done to try and save it?", "post": "Well basically my story begins with my grandfather raising 2 trees,  one in the front yard, and another in the backyard, next to my window. I was the  only person in my family who enjoyed these trees other than my grandfather. In January my grandfather passed away in a horrible manner. About a week after he passed, everyone in my family jumped straight onto tree #1 to cut it down because it was sick.  I tried to propose treating the tree instead of cutting it down, and told them why I wanted to keep the tree. Instead of listening to me, I arrived home from school one day to find the tree massacred in my front yard. It was in such a condition that it will NEVER grow back. This has left me with an incredibly large amount of guilt . I often times feel as if I am worth nothing because I did not do enough to protect the thing I love. Now it is happening again, because the second tree needs to be cut down to redo the roof. My dad tried to cut it down, so i ran outside and began yelling, then crying. It has been left alone for about an hour, but i have no idea as to what will happen when I go back to school.", "summary": "My grandpa left two trees that we both loved for me to take care of when he died, my family hated tree #1 and cut it down, I feel guilt and now my family has attempted to cut down tree #2."}
{"id": "t3_3lu6s6", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Want to hang out with girlfriend more over the winter but cant due to parents.", "post": "so me and my girlfriend who are both same age, (20) have been in a relationship for the last two months and everything has been great. We hang out pretty often since neither of us are allowed over because of both our parents religious backgrounds. they would not condone dating unless we were serious about it.\nSo winters right around the corner and we would like to spend time indoors and watch netflix blah blah blah. how can I do this since we cant go over to each others place? i dont want to spend money all the time rent a nice hotel stay there for the weekend. nothing beats home so yeah.", "summary": "want to go over to gfs place/bring her over to mine but cant due to our parents. plus winters around the corner so hanging out outside is not an option. plus both of us are students so we're kinda broke."}
{"id": "t3_264t5a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28M] and my girlfriend[23F] have been dating (officially) for 3 months, but she doesn't love me.", "post": "So, I have been officially dating my girlfriend about 3 months, but we've known each other for like 2 years before that, and we have always liked each other, it just took a long while to start a relationship.\n\nLast night, she told me that she likes me very much, and doesn't regret being in a relationship, but also said that she doesn't know if she loves me or even knows what love is. I believe that given the time we've known each other, all the time we spent together, and that she knows my qualities and flaws, that she should know what she feels for me. She claims she doesn't want to lose me. I love her but she doesn't feel the same... yet.\n\nAm I selfish for expecting to be loved in a relationship? Should I wait or am I wasting my time?", "summary": "Girlfriend doesn't know if she loves me yet, though I think she should know by now. Is it worth waiting for it to happen or not?"}
{"id": "t3_43ryuj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When things get competitive , I do not like it and I try to avoid a potential relationship. Is this the right thing to do? [24 M]", "post": "I am a college student that goes to university. I am usually quite social and quite flirty when I am in my classes (although I focus on my classes more to get the best grade I can). I have met this girl in one of my classes and she is really awesome. I got her phone number, we text here and there, and we get along. I have a good feeling about her. However, one of the reasons why I do not like dating classmates is that it gets VERY competitive. I went to one of my classes today and this other guy is chatting it up with the girl I have been talking to and I did not have a chance to talk to her that much today. When things get competitive, it really turns me off and I seem to avoid a potential relationship altogether. Is this the right thing to do? I feel like I can not control these things and I do not want to make the environment feel like the \"animal kingdom\" and \"edgy\" if you know what I mean. Anyone else feel this way? What should I do?\n\n*An important note, I get turned off when a lot of guys talk to one girl (For example: A girl is texting 5 guys at a time and there is a rotation where you wait your turn)", "summary": "Another guy has been chatting it up with the girl I have been talking to, should I just abandon the potential relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_2gsgwd", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "I had a concussion back in High School and ever since them nothing has really been the same for me. (21M)", "post": "I played football in High School and my senior year I suffered a concussion during a practice and tried to keep playing. One of the coaches made me sit out the rest of practice and I thought I would be fine.\n\nOver the next few months I had a few bouts of sleep paralysis (I would wake up and barely be able to move while my eyes would be darting back and forth uncontrollably.) This hasn't really happened the past few years, but occasionally in my sleep I will faintly remember clenching down with my teeth very hard or stretching one of my calves to the point where I pull a muscle. This too has happened less and less frequently over time, though.\n\nThe other side to this is that I know for a fact that I have been a more moody (for lack of a better word) person since it happened. I get angry/depressed way more than what I used to. I actually used to be really laid back, patient, and level. My grades/ability to learn has also taken a noticeable dip. I used to learn with ease and understand everything that I was taught in school. Now I struggle learning new materials and/or applying older concepts from high school/earlier in college (for example, remember something as simple as common denominators and using it for Calculus).\n\nBut the main reason I came here is because I never really told anyone much about this, and I am afraid that this is something that will plague me for the rest of my life. My biggest concern is that I lost some of my intellectual ability that I used to have, and am afraid this will affect my career prospects once I graduate.", "summary": "I never went to the doctors/told anyone about my concussion and the problems resulting from it, and would like advice on what I should do."}
{"id": "t3_2a3fjp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19F] with my Boyfriend [20M] of 1 year, he is still VERY close (too close!) with ex", "post": "Hi guys!\nSo my boyfriend and I have been together since the summer before I started college (we go to the same school). Before he went to college, he ended things with his high school girlfriend, whom he had dated for less than six months. I found his yearbook, and her note to him in it that was all about how she wishes they met sooner, she's going to miss him terribly, and signed love at the end. He told me he wasn't serious about her - in fact, one night he told me he only dated her as a way to get laid his senior year of high school. \nOver Christmas Break, she was \"in his neighborhood\" (super far from where she lives) and asked him to get coffee...but he didn't tell me until long after, insisted nothing happened and said he never told me because he didn't think it was important. \nShe talks to him all the time (I accidentally grabbed his phone instead of mine one morning last semester and there was a facebook message from her about \"vajazzling\"...not exactly 9am ex-girlfriend talk) and it makes me EXTREMELY uncomfortable. This being said, his ex girlfriend has had a pretty terrible home life and I know he feels bad about that, but I still don't know if I can trust him. He says its definitely possible that she still has feelings for him - but I don't know if he feels that way about her still, even though he's now with me. Help me out? \nBefore anyone asks, I haven't gone through their conversations!", "summary": "Boyfriend's ex is, I believe, still into him, talks to him all the time, and I don't know if I can trust him to not fall for her"}
{"id": "t3_514dpq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my guy? [31 M] 2 months, can anyone give me tips of initiating the DTR conversation?", "post": "Been seeing this guy for 2 months, met organically at a friend's event. \n\nHe's been absolutely wonderful, but I know he went through a really tough break up a year ago and I'm the first person he's dated since. While he texts me all the time and is always asking me to go on dates/go do things/plus now we have sex, he's never said anything that actually implies that he likes me. He told me I looked pretty once. He almost always pays despite my protests, and has invited me to meet some friends, and to events where his coworkers are. He did not introduce me to said coworkers. I hate that I am overthinking this. I need to just ask. Also, I am aware that I qualify as a emotionally higher maintenance person who likes compliments and confirmation that someone is into me.  \n\nBasically what I am wanting to ask him is if he's even looking for a relationship, not necessarily if he knows whether or not he wants one with me now. But for whatever reason I can't figure out how to ask. Like, do I do it when we're just watching Wheel of Fortune? or in the middle of a date? on the phone? I'm afraid of coming across as clingy or jumping the gun. But I am looking for a LTR with someone and if that's not even on his radar at all at this point in his life then I'm going to cut bait and keep looking. \n\nSo any tips for me? How did you guys do this yourselves? Sometimes I feel like his lack of certain types of attention clue that he is not, but in other ways clue that he is. I need to ask.", "summary": "what is the best way/time to bring up the DTR conversation? I don't want to come across as clingy or rushing the \"relationship\""}
{"id": "t3_ohez3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Would Reddit be interested in a Reddit Trading Card Game?", "post": "Hi Reddit!\n\nMe and my friends have way too much time on our hands, and have started a little project. We're planning on making a Reddit Trading Card Game!\n\n[If you don't know what a TCG is, here is the wikipedia page on the subject.](\n\n**Ideas so far**\n\n*Please note that this idea is really new, and therefore also really raw.*\n\nThe cards would be memes, timeless ones or just the ones that are popular for some time and then disappear. It will all be there.\n\nThe \"Life\" of the cards will be karma. If you have something that gives you *upvotes*, you gain karma, and therefore have more life. If you have something that *downvotes*, you lose karma, and therefore have less life.\n\nThe \"Energy\" or \"Mana\" will be called *Power* (not settled). Red Power will for example be called Rage Power.\n\nThe area where you play out your memes, will be called the \"Front Page\". Your deck is called \"Links\" (open for suggestions on this one), when your meme's die or you have used a one-use card, they get \"Deleted\".\n\n**We need YOUR help!**\n\nIf you're interested in this project, please visit [/r/rtcg](/r/rtcg) and leave your suggestions there! We need help with game rules, we need artists, and we need creative minds for ideas! If you want to help us with this project in any way, be it drawing, coming up with ideas and rules, or anything else that might be useful, send me a message, we would love getting your help!", "summary": "We're making a Reddit TCG. Visit [/r/rtcg](/r/rtcg) and leave your suggestions there!"}
{"id": "t3_1l8912", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26m] want to convince my girlfriend [22f] to go to college", "post": "About eight months ago I met a girl (named Alyssa) that I hired to clean my apartment. For reference she is 22 from Costa Rica and I am 26 and white. I started talking to her while she was working and some casual flirting and soon enough we were dating. \nUnlike majority of the women I have dated, Alyssa was different in the sense she was a simple quiet girl. She never wore flashy clothing or cared for high end purses and was an overall a really humble person. And for me she was the ideal wifey material.\n However there is one problem in our relationship. Alyssa hasn't had any education past high school and I come from a family where most people have a master's degree. Alyssa and I talked about post marriage plans and that most likely she would become a housewife. However, that being said I would still like her to have a degree. One, so she can be a more refined individual. Second and most importantly, so my family will approve of her.  \nI know many of you are going to say just ignore your family, that their opinions don't matter but, it is never as simple as that. First of all I have a very positive relationship with my family and if it wasn't for their advice and guidance I wouldn't be at the position where I am at now. Second, I partly agree with their stance.\nThe problem is when I talked to Alyssa about going back to school she says that she isn't cut out for college. I tried talking to her about but she says she is too old now and that she isn't smart enough. I would really like her to get a college degree but I don't want her to think that I am trying to make her qualify for my acceptance. She is very submissive in general and I don't want her to do it just because I told her so but actually want her to wholeheartedly enjoy going to school. \n I really want to be careful with my choice of wording mainly because no one in her family has graduated with a degree so I don't want to come off condescending; there is a large enough cultural barrier between me and her, and I don't want to make it any worse.", "summary": "I date Hispanic girl I want to marry but I want her to get a college degree, she says she isn't cut out for school"}
{"id": "t3_cl941", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Question", "post": "A few days I was reading an article called [Beware the 30 year\nold Virgin](\n(I'm in that category). Ever since I've been thinking about the\nimplications of #2\n(I'll repost the relevant bit here, no need to read the whole\narticle; the emphasis is mine):\n\n> 2) Any geek can get laid if he wants to. [...] sex is not\n> limited to the beautiful or intelligent minority.  In fact, I\n> am bombarded with enough Ugly People PDA that I am more than\n> convinced of this theory. Our minds have a way of playing\n> tricks on us when we fall in love, and then **there's always**\n> **cheap booze or the cheap hooker on the corner.** So, in the end,\n> if this guy is crying that he's never gotten some nooky just\n> because he is still waiting for the one - the lucky you - then\n> most likely something is truly wrong with him. [...]\n> Men have plenty of sperm to spread around with random women on\n> random park benches, so what makes you so special that he's\n> been waiting his whole life to save it for you?  Most likely\n> it is some fantastical lie to cover up his anti-socialness\n> that is so freaky (\u00e0 la \"serial murderer\" freaky) that would\n> make him a less than cuddly companion.\n\nI've never considered it ethical to try to \"hook up\" with\ndrunks. I have occasionally considered hookers, but I would\nrather be with a girlfriend, someone I had real feelings for.\nI'm not even sure I could enjoy it much in either case, without\na fully willing partner, who genuinely wanted me. It's clear\nhere that some women do think differently, that any sexual\nexperience is more appealing than none.\n\n(", "summary": "start here) So I ask my fellow RA readers, which of the following are the most and least creepy/unappealing:"}
{"id": "t3_1hb1sm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] slept with another guy [20M] after breaking up with my BF [19M], but now want to get back with my ex. How to bring this up?", "post": "My ex and I were together for a year before I broke it off. My reasons were fairly immature; I was bored by the monotony of our relationship, wanted to date around and enjoy my youth, etc. Part of this sudden change might have been due to medication-induced hypomania, as I had recently started a new antidepressant (I have been in treatment for bipolar disorder for several years now). Regardless, it seems like a kind of stupid decision now.  \n\nI met another guy a few weeks after the breakup who seemed fun, light-hearted, and interested in me. We hit it off and almost immediately began dating and sleeping together. However, it didn't take long for me to realize that he was not right for me (for reasons I can explain if necessary, but I don't want to make this post too long).  \n\nA month has passed and my ex of a year and I have begun talking again. I'm feeling a bit more stable on my meds now and I think we're both considering getting back together. While I know this would usually be easy (we had an extraordinarily close bond and good chemistry), I don't know how to approach the topic of the other guy. My ex and I lost our virginities to each other, and I know that the idea of me having sex with another guy would absolutely tear him apart. However, I could never hide that from him with a clear conscience.  \n\nSo, how should I go about that discussion? Or am I just not cut out for a healthy relationship right now? I just feel like a despicable person and don't know where to go from here.", "summary": "Broke up with BF, slept with another guy, now considering getting together with the first ex but don't know how to break the news that I dated/slept with another guy while we were broken up."}
{"id": "t3_2qolyr", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I'm Doing Better", "post": "I was in a dark place exactly 22 days ago. What's interesting is that I know this because I posted on this subreddit. I actually just noticed that I posted it, because honestly, I forgot. I re read what I said, and I can say that I understand exactly what I was saying at the time, and even agree with it. I understand that what I did was fucked up, and that it wasn't what I wanted, but you know what? I'm who I am right this fucking instant because of it, and dammit, I fucking love me. It feels good. It feels good to actually like yourself, rather than hing on what others say. Deduce your worth based on your interpretation of others appraisal of you.\n\nSHIT, you know what? I just fucked up with like two girls in the past two days, and that's soooo shitty. I just broke a nofap streak of like 2 weeks! But the funny thing is, I'm still me, and I'm still the shit. I'm learning from the stupid mistakes I make, and that's the only way I'd ever have it.", "summary": "I fuck up, you fuck up, he shit it fucks up, just know that you fuck up in your own unique ways, and that's what makes you awesome. "}
{"id": "t3_47ab1f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] and her [17 F] starting to get together. I asked her out, and when the time came around she forgot we had plans. Not sure how to continue", "post": "Me and this girl have been chatting for awhile, and we recently made plans to go out for dinner. \n\nThis morning when I asked her where I should pick her up she was confused. The conversation went like this\n\nme: So where should I pick you up tonight\n\nher: ?\n\nme: For dinner?\n\nher: Sorry, did we make plans?\n\nme: Yeah\n\nher: Oh, I forgot :(\n\nI wound up never replying because well, what could I have said really. It's been about 12 hours and I've thought about just texting her to ask if she's actually interested because our conversations don't seem to go on for very long, but I enjoy talking to her. \n\nAnd the times that we've been together (at our mutual friends house) we've cuddled constantly. And she seemed interested at the time. \n\nI just don't know how to proceed from here, she seems like a really cool person, and it'd be awesome to go out with her because she doesn't seem turned off by my nerdy lifestyle. But at the same time it felt pretty shitty knowing she just forgot about our plans.", "summary": "Me and girl started getting together after talking for awhile. Had date set up, she completely forgot we had plans. Not sure what to do now."}
{"id": "t3_1jv82t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Pointers for a 'semi' LDR? 23M+F", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for a few months now. But we have known each other as friends for almost 7 years. We've spent the better part of these past few months seeing each other, and I feel like our relationship is progressing wonderfully. Because of the fact we knew each other before we started dating, we didn't have the awkward 'trying to decide if you're a homicidal maniac' phase that a new relationship may have. We have a large level of trust and we care for each other very much. \n\nNow, here's where things get complicated... She just graduated university and jobs relative to her degree are few and far between in my city. So we kind of knew that things may be different when she eventually did get a job. She didn't want to move too far from home, but couldn't get a job in the city. She ended up landing a job where she is away for 3 weeks at a time. \n\nThe catch is, that during those 3 weeks communication is going to be very difficult (she is working on boats in the open ocean). So talking to her daily, potentially even weekly is an issue.\n\nWe've talked about it before she left, and we are both interested in making this work. We know it will be hard, and very trying, but we care for each other and truly enjoy the time we spend together. \n\nHave any of you had a situation like this? Do you have any pointers about how to make things work?", "summary": "Girlfriend will be away for 3 weeks at a time where communication will be very difficult. How to work around this?"}
{"id": "t3_43gebm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] just saw my ex[20 F] of four months at a party my band was hosting and I can't shake this nasty feeling.", "post": "So my band threw this party and put a flyer on instagram and all that jazz so everyone was invited.  And it was obvious that I along with everyone in my band was gonna be there.\n\nSo my ex who I was with for 2 years but broke up with 4 months ago showed up with her friends (knowing I would be there).  I broke up with her but it was on \"good terms\" for the most part, so I thought.  \n\nAt this party she didn't even look at me when she came in as I was letting people through the door even though I said hi to her.  And her best friend very rudely threw her entry money at my hands instead of handing it to me.  So I'm assuming they don't like me very much.\n\nAnyway, during this party I was at the door most of the time letting people in and out and she would come outside and talk to random people right in front of me.  This bothered me SOOO much.  I know she wasn't doing anything \"wrong\" but did she really have to talk to people right in front of me? One of the times she came out she was holding onto this guys arm as she walked out right in front of me.  These were obvious ploys to make me jealous and uncomfortable and although I wouldn't say I was jealous God was I uncomfortable. \n\nNow I can't stop thinking about her standing right in front of me and being annoyed about it.  I feel so bothered. I have absolutely nothing against her and wish her the best but how can I shake these nasty feelings? I was fine prior to seeing her and even though I don't want to get back with her I feel like I'm going through the break up all over again.  I would appreciate any advice.  Thank you!", "summary": "Saw exgf at a party.  She tried to make me jealous.  It kinda worked now I feel annoyed/bothered and can't stop thinking about it. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2unfpq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19M) drunkenly messed around with my friend (19M) and regret it. Should I tell my girlfriend (19F)", "post": "Last night I went over to my best friend's place and we were drinking and I eventually got fairly drunk and my gay friend was being a bit suggestive. In my less than ideal state of mind decided well here's my chance to try doing stuff with a guy. \n\nThere was nothing intimate about it at all and he just did oral on me for a few minutes before I tried doing it on him. I stopped after 2 minutes because I kinda realized what I had done.\n\nImmediately I recognized it had been a terrible idea because I have a girlfriend. All I saw it as, was a chance to experiment with a guy in case I don't get the chance in the future if my girlfriend and I who have been together for nearly 3 years now was to be a forever kind of thing.\n\nThough now I am seriously regretting it and he has said that he wouldn't ever tell anyone about it. I don't know if I should tell my girlfriend or not because it was just a one off thing that I don't have any interest in doing again.\n\nI don't think she would take it well at all even though it meant absolutely nothing to me.\n\nAny advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks", "summary": "got drunk with gay friend and 5 minutes of oral happened, I regret it and don't know what to do about my girlfriend."}
{"id": "t3_rg49y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I'm kind of in a sticky situation...Any assistance would be appreciated.....", "post": "So our subdivision is consisted of a bunch of racist assholes....It's a pretty well off upper-middle class area. My \"situation\" begins from the community facilities area (where the pool, basketball, tennis courts are). They implemented a really retarded security gate feature, that requires an electronic keycard. Now the entering process with the card is really annoying to me as the gate never opens, and it just beeps.. So I just jump over it...There's 2 gates, one gate for sidewalk opening and another for cars to pass through....It has security cameras (god forbid someone trespasses to play tennis or what have you)...So apparently they caught \"me\" and \"a companion\" opening the car part of the gate on camera.. Pictures were taken and distributed to all residents, but *someone* out of honesty replied saying it was \"us.\" Now the board of directory is claiming that the gate was tampered with and all this exaggerated bullshit, even though many people pass through the same way, but we have no proof...they are denying access and claiming to bill \"us\" of damages....Judging by videos/pictures they can't necessarily \"convict\" it to be us... because \"I\" haven't confessed to be any part of it... Now bear in mind there has been many robberies in our neighborhood, I've been robbed for at least a grand of things in my garage including mail...yet they chose to add security to an unnecessary area.. Now what can I do in my defense? They are not buying that we didn't do anything in terms of damage, it's pretty evident that nothing was necessarily damaged, just the gate was yanked open....It is a huge metal gate that's magnet retracted....So in my defense what can I say/do?", "summary": "Opened a gate the incorrect way, apparently \"damaged\", Home owners Ass. refusing us access and billing us damages..."}
{"id": "t3_2jxahz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [18F] of 2 years can't handle me [19M] because she's all I have.", "post": "So..  \nOver the past three days my gf has been having a bit of a breakdown.  \nIt started off because of too much negativity which I will admit to, I've frankly been an asshole quite frequently. Complaining, calling her things. And I've just been blind to it, mostly due to stress and financial troubles.  But the second day it wasn't about that at all, she brings up how she wants more friends. This is important because she didn't use to, but now she's found some people she feels comfortable around. At first this rubbed me the wrong way because I thought \"why does she need this now when before I've brought all the happiness she ever needed\" but of course I admit that she can have friends, I'm just taken off guard.  \n  \nToday it was that because I have little to no life or reason to live without her, it's a problem. She feels that she can't be who she wants to be because I'd sit at home wishing we could've had that time together instead, even though I tell her that I'd be fine with it, wouldn't take it out on her and find things to do.  \n  \nBut it's not good enough. I'm willing to change anything and everything to make her happy and make her stay with me, but all I get is that it's too late, not enough..  \n  \nShe's always known that I was at the lowest of the low, and on the brink of ending it when we met. She's known that without her, I can't be happy, and I wouldn't be able to function, so essentially being forced to off myself.  \nAnd I don't use this to try and guilt trip her, but she knows that's how pathetic I am.. because I truly cannot be happy without her.  \nBut at one point we both felt that way for each other, and she adored that she was everything to me.\n  \nThe situation now is that she has stated it's over.  \nBut I keep hoping she'll reconsider, at least give me a chance to see if it can work.", "summary": "Past three days my girlfriend has listed reasons why it's not working. I've admitted to faults and promised change, but to no avail."}
{"id": "t3_4dy7bk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18F] bf [19M] relies on me when he is struggling but never takes my advice. It drives me crazy and I want it to stop.", "post": "I'm a college freshman, and my bf is currently completing high school. We've been dating a year. He's a great boyfriend and treats me better than I ever thought a person would. \n\nHis family life is difficult, and he relies on me almost exclusively to help him deal with the stress and anxiety associated. This is really stressful. On some occasions, I've had to abandon plans for a day/evening to look after him, because he has no one else to call.\n\nHowever, I try and help him minimise these stresses by suggesting solutions. He always agrees with me at the time but then does nothing. His family is struggling financially, but he still hasn't sorted out a small administrative issue stopping him from receiving government support. He has access to counselling but doesn't bother organising it. Even small things like getting him to change his bed or tidy his room require weeks/months of nagging. \n\nSome people have told me to break up with him because he needs to learn to look after himself. I don't want to give up because I figure everyone has to compromise somewhere, and apart from this, he's amazing. But I worry what will happen in the future, and if this behaviour will continue. I've given ultimatums in the past and he hasn't changed until the very last second, and only for a limited period of time.", "summary": "My bf relies on me so much when things are hard and then doesn't take my advice or look after himself to help himself. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_y8lee", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What should you do if your roommate is preparing to not pay for utilities, etc", "post": "I'm pretty sure my roommate has no intention of paying the final bills we move out. I have no direct evidence of this, but I'm in a situation where my roommate and I have had a serious falling out and he seems to do his best to screw me over on hundreds of little things. In addition, he has described himself more than once as \"vindictive\" without apology. Now that our lease is up and we're moving out, I fear that he won't pay his share of the utilities or internet bills, etc for the last month (these are in my name). Is there anything I can do to protect myself or should I just prepare to suck it up accept it. Also, we will have no reason to see each other and live in different cities afterwards.", "summary": "All the utilities etc are in my name. Is there anything I can do to make sure my roommate pays his fair share after we move out next month?"}
{"id": "t3_24yenn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [19F] with a hookup [21M], he knowingly gave her an STI, is doing it to other women", "post": "A friend of mine went on a date with a guy from OK Cupid. Eventually they got back to his place and had unprotected sex, at his request. Later, she told him that she wasn't interested in dating, and he flipped out and sent her a ton of messages calling her a slut. One of the messages said something along the lines of \"oh, lucky you I guess, because I'm not exactly healthy ;) \" \n\nThis obviously freaked her out, so she went to get tested and found out he gave her chlamydia. A week or so later we find out that another girl we know was dating him at the SAME TIME he hooked up with my friend. This girl thought her relationship with him was exclusive. She also said he insisted on unprotected sex with her. \n\nNow we are all afraid he is going around and intentionally giving women STI's. Is there anything we can do?", "summary": "Guy knowingly gives my friend an STI. She finds out he had a girlfriend. He might be doing it to other women."}
{"id": "t3_plvnl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend won't stop praising me and it's a complete turn-off", "post": "Let me start off with a disclaimer: I am not an egotist by any means. In fact, I despise haughtiness to the point of psychosis. I know this probably doesn't seem like a \"real problem\" but hear me out. When we first started dating I thought it was cute how \"into me\" she was. Not to mention the fact that I'd never really experienced being so gratuitously complimented by a member of the opposite sex. We've been dating for nearly a year and she hasn't slowed down in telling me how \"hot\" and \"perfect\" I am, and how she can't find a single flaw with me (these are her words mind you; I'm a pretty humble guy, probably a hard 7 in terms of looks, and am not perfect by any means). The more I hear it, the more cringe-worthy it becomes. The worst part is that she uses it as a metric for her own self-deprecation, saying how she needs to \"work out twice a day just to be hot enough for me\" when I persistently tell her that I am perfectly happy with the way she looks. She confesses her adulation for me on a daily basis pretty much, saying things like \"I worship pretty much everything about you\" and \"I don't know what I'd do if you left me.\" I love pretty much everything else about her, but this one tiny problem is quite maddening and I feel like I'm becoming less attracted to her the more she says these things. Is this what you girls mean when you chastise men for \"putting the pussy on a pedestal?\" It's weird seeing it from the other side. But yea, any thoughts? What can I say to her that will get the point across but won't hurt her feelings in the process?", "summary": "Constant praise from the girlfriend is turning me off, how do I tell her to knock it off without hurting her feelings or our relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_530ziv", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "9 days at Chengdu/Jiuzhaigou (China) at end of October, need advice on itinerary", "post": "I am in a rut. My family decided to go Chengdu recently but threw all the planning matters to me, and I am in a lost of what is Chengdu like other than hotter than sin hotpots and an other worldly location in Jiuzhaigou.\n\nHere's the plan:\n3 days Chengdu. No idea what locations to visit. I browse thru sites at Tripadvisor. Personally I think I will choose Jinli, Hakka Village. Somewhere unique but not too \"fake\". My parents unfortunately has a rather bad experience in Kyoto and they would like it if its not full of \"UNESCO\" heritage stuff but scenery is way too manufactured (I know, quite a controversial opinion but it makes my dad refuses to go to Tokyo this year even if he never been there). And some nice food. My dad's quite picky and quite unpredictable with food taste but he does like non-oily food. He is quite contradictory when it comes to oily food.\n\nThere is a talk of going Hailuogou. We have never been in a glacier and in short term are not likely to go to anything similar but our aunt recommend us to go there. Personally it sounds great to me.\n\n3 days JiuZhaiGou - We are not going to Huanglong or WenChuan (we really dont want to), but straight away to JiuzhaiGou by flight. Will it be feasible to go in 3 days? What are the things I should take care of? By the way Jiuzhaigu is a compulsory for the trip.\n\n2 days Chengdu.If we are going Hailuogou then we will go to the places mentioned above.\n\nAll of my family speak Chinese so languages shouldn't be a concern. Should we get a guide in Chengdu/hailuogou or Jiuzhaigou? My dad is disabled so he's our primary concern. He is perfectly willing to shell out money for transport/stay in hotel if the place is too dangerous, but we will like it if he can participate with us if not all of the time.", "summary": "Want some authentic places to visit Chengdu. Also whether we can make it to Hailuogou in 2/3 days.And also how do we make it in Jiuzhaigou in 3 days."}
{"id": "t3_47gncp", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "It's been a year out of college and I STILL don't have a \"career\" job yet.", "post": "Hello Reddit,\n\nFirst time poster in this subreddit. It's been a about 14 months since I've graduated undergraduate, and I've been having trouble finding an entry level, full time position in either marketing or sales. When I first graduated, I had a fair share of interviews and recruiters contacting me, but I had received no formal offer or I ended up through the process realizing the company might not be a good fit.\n\nI'm underemployed at the moment working a job paying $13/hr that doesn't require a Bachelor's degree, so I'm keeping my head above water in paying my student loans and other bills, but just barely. I live at home and I am saving money, but I can't help but feel discouraged that I \"SHOULD\" have a salaried position at this point, but I don't.\n\nI tweak my resume to the job description with keywords, I actively use LinkedIn, reach out for networking, and nothing seems to materialize other than the automated rejection email sent by computers. \n\nI apply to at the very least, 2 jobs per week, and I feel like my resume doesn't even get glanced upon by human eyes at this point, even when I include a personalized cover letter with my application. I'm wondering if there are any other redditers on here with similar experiences struggling to find their \"career\" jobs as well within their recent years of post undergraduate life, because sometimes I feel like I might be the only one. If anyone can share their experiences, I would LOVE to hear them.", "summary": "Graduated college a year ago, underemployed at the moment but still don't have career job after constantly applying. Advice? Similar stories? Would love to hear feedback, it's greatly appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_3ra5vb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my boyfriend [27 M] OF 6 months, paranoia and insecurity about cheating especially after reading r/relationships. How do I get rid of this?", "post": "I have been dating my boyfriend for a couple months, and am currently in a long distance relationship. He is amazing- always initiates skype calls, sends me random loving emails, initiates sexts, sends me gifts through Amazon, etc etc. All signs point towards a great, faithful guy.\n\nHowever, what scares me is the possibility of him cheating on me emotionally. There are some examples on this sub where OP's were totally blindsided by their spouses/SO's cheating on them. Since I never touch his phone/laptop and only visit him a couple hours a week, even if he was texting/calling other girls I would have no idea.\n\nThere was also an incident in the first month of our relationship (after we confirmed exclusivity and relationship status). I caught him striking up a conversation with a girl he met on Tinder, which is also how we met. It was an innocuous text exchange, but he wanted to call her, which she refused. He told me it was because we had an argument and he just wanted to talk to a friend to take his mind off of it. I decided to accept this.\n\nIt's been a couple months since that incident, and I don't feel it's fair for me to bring that up in discussion with him. I decided to forgive him so I should stick with it. Most of the time, I know I am being paranoid- he is really a great boyfriend, very loving and spends basically all his free time with me. However, a couple days ago when I visited him, I looked over his shoulder while he was on Facebook and saw that he recently messaged a pretty girl at his school, just saying hi and how are you. I know it's ridiculous- they're classmates after all, and he can obviously talk to anyone. But that whole day I was in a bit of a funk.\n\nHow do I get rid of these insecurities? If a boyfriend is loving and caring, should I just let it go?", "summary": "If a boyfriend is loving, caring, and obviously very into me should I rest assured that he will not emotionally/physically cheat on me?"}
{"id": "t3_45gwry", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] and my girlfriend [18F] broke up a couple of days ago and it lasted 4 months. We were forced to but we want to get back together. We don't know what do to.", "post": "So me and my girlfriend dated for 4 months and we're in our last year of high school. We were forced to break up because of her low grades. The counselor kept bugging her even though she's always had low grades. The counselor told her mom that she had a bf and her mom got mad. She told her to break up with me.\n\nNow her parents have her on check and so does the counselor. The counselor has people watching her to make sure she doesn't have a bf. We're still friends but I can only talk to her in 1 class and I can only message her. \n\nWe want to get back together but we don't know what to do. I told her that I'd ask her out again later on but she said the she couldn't promise if we would get back together or not. The only good thing is that she still likes me and not someone one else but that could change. Should I wait until we graduate or until she has better grades?", "summary": "We were forced to break up but her parents have her on check. We want to get back together but we're not sure about what to do. What should we do?"}
{"id": "t3_2l7v8e", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Freshly single - Looking to get fit and coupled.", "post": "The title might be a little difficult to understand, sorry. I'm a bigger guy (256 lbs) and, unfortunately, as brief as my first relationship was, I had to end it due to her complete lack of communication. So, now I want to get fit, to the point where I could be considered remotely sexy for a guy. I'm currently 22 and I'm going to a community college.\n\nThe problem comes in where I also want to have a girlfriend at the same time that I'm getting fit. I've gotten slightly addicted! So, any previously heavy guys who have dated/tried to date while they were slimming down have any tips for me? I know it sounds douchey of me, but I'm not sure I can wait for months up to a year before I can get a skinnier girlfriend.\n\nAny tips or comments are appreciated.", "summary": "I'm fat, trying to get skinny. Currently in community college. Want to date girls. Halp, plz?"}
{"id": "t3_ur1ql", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend doesn't seem to want me hanging out with is group of friends, what gives?", "post": "I am F (22) and he is 24, dating a year and seven months. \n\nI'm not the best at making friends and most of my close friends don't live nearby anymore. I'm not planning on moving back to my hometown when I graduate college this December. I want to stay in the area I'm in. I would like to hang out with my bf and his friends more often so that I am not so lonely. I have communicated this to him on numerous occasions. He does not react to it.\n\nTo be clear:  Yes, I do have friends. But I like the social situation he's in better than mine. Where numerous people are involved. I could make friends, but it's difficult for me. I don't want our social circles separate. Whenever I have friends over my place I invite him as well. I am not asking him to include me EVERY time he hangs out with them. A couple times per week - maybe even once per week - would suffice!\n\nHe hangs out at this one couple's apartment (and their one roommate who has been my bf's friend since high school) almost as much as he hangs out at my apartment. They are social butterflies so to speak, and they often have numerous different people over. They live ten minutes from me. He sees them after he gets off work, and then comes to my place.  Sometimes he gets so caught up in hanging with them, that he doesn't even come to my place. I can probably count on my hand the number of times I have been to their apartment with him.\n\nHoly fucking shit would I love for him to just start including me in his social life. I don't understand why it goes in one ear and out the other. Does he seriously not want me around his friends? I am getting angry typing this.\n\nI don't know how to confront him about the situation. I already have and he won't listen. To be honest it almost makes me want to break up with him, even though we have a great relationship otherwise!", "summary": "My boyfriend doesn't seem to want me hanging out with his group of friends, what can I do to change that?"}
{"id": "t3_2ynk3f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] with my girlfriend [29 F] of 1 year, depression, stress - What broke you?", "post": "Background [here] and [here](\n\nI need to ask this question, and I realise that by asking it some people may condemn me to the worst part of a garbage bin, but I have to ask.\n\nIf you have been in a relationship with someone who has had depression and/or anxiety (as well as eating disorder in the case of my girlfriend), and you loved them so much and cared for them, what broke your back? What was it that finally drove you to say goodbye? \n\nI don't want to end our relationship, I love her and I care for her so much and try my absolute best, but is there an 'outsider' threshold that most people have?", "summary": "If you've been in a relationship with someone who had severe depression, what was it that 'broke the back' of the relationship leading you to end the relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_1ow3xs", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "College graudate: what do i do?", "post": "Hello Reddit,\n\nLong time lurker and first time poster. I recently graduated from a well-known university with a management science degree (a lot of economic classes with emphasis in math, microeconomics, econometrics, etc.).\n\nIt has been about 5-6 months since I graduated and I really don't know what to do with my life. I realized that I don't know anything of the real world and that I don't have the business personality and mindset that so many people in my major seem to have. Along with that, I have no experience with internships or anything of the sort. I was just that college student that took classes and did nothing else but do general club activities, drink and game.\n\nI feel like I made a wrong choice in my major and that I should go back to school (looking into a computer science degree as I am interested in the subject and the job opportunities that are open with it). Even though I have no idea on how to do such a thing.\nWhat I'm wondering about is this. Is it smart to go back to school to get another bachelor's or should I just try to keep finding jobs in my major? Also, to those that say I should go back to school, should I go back to my old university (where I would have to pay an arm and a leg for) or is an associates good enough for this field?\n\nSorry if this seems like a \"I need help, please give me all the answers with no work on my part\" type of question. I have just been extremely depressed for the past month as I took an extra year to graduate with this major after switching from a science and all of my friends seem to have moved on to the next stage of their lives.\n\nP.S: If neither of the questions seem like a good idea, any answer would be great. I just feel like my glass was shattered when I finally left school. Finding out I don't really like my major, and with no classes to take, I feel like I can do anything; however, I just don't want to make the another mistake (such as switching from science to management science without really thinking about it).", "summary": "Depressed college graduate with a BS in Management Science wondering if to go back to school for a Bachelor's in Computer science. yay or nay?"}
{"id": "t3_rcugk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Somebody reblogged a picture of our baby on a tumblr porn page?!", "post": "Dear redditors, \nI opened my first Tumblr account about a week ago for sharing pictures of my newborn daughter with family and friends.  We disabled google search so that nobody could find us. \n\nToday, I saw something that turned my stomach. A Tumblr user had reblogged a picture of our daughter onto their own page. When I looked at their page it was full of explicit porn. (a la 4chan)  \n\nI'm not sure why they reblogged it to their Tumbr and frankly I don't care. I attempted to delete the photos from my page hoping that the link would be dead... but they stayed on the other person's page. I e-mailed Tumblr for help but they have not responded yet.\n\nI'm creeped out by a photo of my newborn daughter being reblogged on a pervy pr0n Tumblr site. Is there anything I can do?", "summary": "Somebody reblogged a family photo of my newborn daughter on their own tumblr.  Now my daughter's photo appears on their Tumblr between lemon-party-ish photos.  I want it removed. How do I do it?"}
{"id": "t3_41wkpj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[26M] broke up with my gf[24F] because of her sexual history, now she's telling people all kinds of lies about me.", "post": "GF and I were together for 8 months. One day we were talking and somehow it came out that she had slept with like 15 people and that 2 of them were one night stands. I told her I wasn't really cool with that and that I wanted to break up. I didn't freak out or get upset or anything, I just told her it wasn't my thing and that we should split. I'll admit that it was pretty terrible timing for this to all go down because she told me she loved me for the first time a week earlier. Given that, I understand why she got so upset. She basically cried, and begged me not to, but I left, got her stuff from my place, dropped it back, and figured that was the end of it.\nWell, for like 3 days she proceeded to blow up my phone and social media basically freaking out, going from crying to angry, so I ended up just blocking her on everything and moving forward with my life.\nI thought everything was cool and fine until earlier today. I ended up meeting a friend I haven't seen in a few weeks for lunch. She told me that my ex told her, and other people, all sorts of fucked up lies about me. For example, she's heard that we broke up because I cheated with 3 different girls, that I hate black people and visit sites like Stormfront, and that I'm secretly addicted to painkillers. WTF. Literally none of those things are even remotely true, I have no idea where the fuck she even pulled those from.\nNow heres the thing, my friend, and I'm sure other close friends of mine, know that its all bullshit and lies and thought it was funny, but I'm genuinely worried that people that only kind of know me will hear this stuff and thing I'm an awful person and overall fuck up my reputation. What should I do to stop her from spreading this bullshit about me?!?!", "summary": "broke up with gf, tried to be nice about it, she freaked out and now shes telilng lies about me"}
{"id": "t3_4lo2w8", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "{26/M} I've been told I look young for my age. Does this help or hurt me with dating women?", "post": "So for the most part, I've been told I look about 19/20 and that I have a baby face. While I know it's a great trait to have when I get older, I feel like it's a turnoff or doesn't make me masculine enough to have women take me seriously when it comes to dating. I've been told plenty by female friends, colleagues, and the like that I'm a super nice, high-energy guy, but when it comes to asking women on dates, I tend to get the runaround, or dare I say it, get put in the \"freind zone\" as they go off and date more masculine guys.  What advice do female redditors have for someone in my situation?", "summary": "Look very young for my age, but I'm in my mid-late twenties. How can I go about getting women to take me seriously when it comes to dating?"}
{"id": "t3_e9bqy", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need ideas for inexpensive holiday gift baskets!  What are your suggestions?", "post": "These gift baskets will not be for friends or family, I'm going to make some up for people who are homeless and I want to have a LOT of them.  When I was a kid I was in this fantastic youth group and we used to meet up every week, and go out and do 'random acts of kindness' which often included giving out gift baskets with food to those less fortunate.\n\nNow that the holidays are coming up it got me thinking about it, and this is something I'd really like to do with my boyfriend.\n\nPlease respond with serious answers.  If you have specific brands that are cheaper, or know of a place where I can obtain these items for free please let me know!\n\nHere's what I've got:\n-Sandwiches\n-Bottles of water and a reusable water bottle (in my state it's illegal to refuse someone water, so this way they can go into a business and get some when they need it)\n-Notebook, stamps, envelopes, pens, and possibly a phone card\n-Blankets, depending on cost\n-gloves/mittens\n-Toothbrush/tooth paste\n-Jackets?  I'm not so sure on this one, because again it depends on cost.\n-A map of the area with the closest homeless shelters highlighted.\n\nI will also be buying a large bag of dog food and filling up ziploc storage bags with it, that way those can just be given out as needed.", "summary": "I'm handing out gift baskets to the homeless for the holidays.  What would be something good to get them that's considered a life essential?"}
{"id": "t3_16p8cb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Feels like me(20) being pregnant is guilting my BF(23)  to stay with me.", "post": "Hello, fellow redditors!\n\nI'm 20 years old and 23 weeks pregnant. I'm in a relationship with my BF (23) for a year now. Let's just say that my BF and I couldn't keep it in our pants and I got pregnant. It was to late for an abortion when we found out. I have been having some kidney problems and the pregnancy tests where negative. So we just assumed my period is late because of my kidneys. We could have applied for an abortion because of the \"special\" circumstances but we decided to keep the baby. My kidneys are fine now and I'm carrying a healthy little kicker.\n\nWell because of the circumstances, I feel like I'm ruining my BF's life. We decided to keep the baby together. And I told him that anytime he changes his mind he can get out. He says that it's his responsibility as well and that he loves me. But he just, well seems sad and stressed. I on the other hand am happy for the baby. Wasn't at first but I just got used to the idea. I guess it's all these pregnancy hormones at work, but I'm enjoying every kick I feel and the thought of holding my baby just blows my mind. In a good way. :)\n\nIt's not exactly what I planned but I don't feel like the baby is gonna ruin my life. Should I feel like that? If I feel a kick, or read something new about pregnancy/baby development I'm afraid to tell my BF. I'm afraid how he would feel if I reminded him that I'm pregnant. I know that I should just talk to him, but I'm afraid he will just say what I want to hear instead of being completaly honest. I just wish he was happy. With the idea of being with me and the baby, or if he would decide to leave. It would brake my heart but I love him and just wish he was happy one way or the other. \n\nWhat do you suggest? How can I ask him subtly how he feels and convince him if needed that he doesn't have to stay just out of guilt?", "summary": "I feel like my BF isn't happy for our pregnancy and that he's only staying out of guilt even tho he says he loves me. Need advice on how to subtly talk to him without offending him."}
{"id": "t3_1i36ow", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (23M) got back with my Ex (21F), Need some advice.", "post": "**Back story:** We met online in a MMO and we dated for 8 months, her aunt went to the hospital and was in critical condition. I was a twat about it and my friend swooped in and played 'boyfriend'. We broke up a month after her aunt was hospitalized and my friend was courting her, he bailed out leaving her more broken. \n\n**Reason for the break-up**: I changed into a total ass, Her words, I also found an old cell phone and I did change and I'm working on getting back to a better place of not being an twat.\n\n**Currently:** Three months after my break up with her we agree to date causally but we are exclusive. We have been having daily skype dates, playing our MMO, watching videos together, and sharing ourselves. \n\nSoon I'll be driving to visit her this summer, once I get the funds. \n\nAnyway, what I am asking is how and what could I do to strengthen the relationship in ways that would not make her feel like I am manipulating her affections, buying her affections, or anything on those grounds.", "summary": "Got back with my ex after three months, how can I strengthen the relationship with out making her feel 'bought'"}
{"id": "t3_5261dy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 F] with my crush [19 M] 3 weeks. Should I pursue my interest?", "post": "I just started college and there is this guy I'm very interested in. We've been talking and have hung out a few times, and we both enjoy photography so we take pictures along with another guy and he's invited me to his dorm to play xbox. \n\nI was really thinking that he likes me, but recently he was talking about his ex-gf and how she's constantly texting him and acting crazy. He explained they broke up bc she didn't want to do long distance and they still had the same feelings but now he's not really into her because of her behavior.\n\nWe went to the beach last night taking pics with his friend, and when we came back, they stopped by a dorm with 2 girls in there that I didn't know. I felt awkward so I left because they all knew each other, they are in the same class. If he liked me wouldn't he have tried to include me?\n\nHe is still texting his ex though, so I am confused.\nHe's really nice and has invited me to do other stuff, although it is always with other people.", "summary": "Guy I like talked about his ex gf. I'm wondering If there is anyway he likes me too, or would he not mention any of this if he liked me? Should I try to pursue my interest and flirt with him?"}
{"id": "t3_2vcnsn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] with my mother [53 F] unsure how to bring up hearing her laughing about abuse", "post": "When I was a teenager, I was subject to various casual, emotional abuses by my parents. Gaslighting, mockery, minimisation etc. It rarely became physical, but when it did it was by my mother.\n\nOne evening I apparently didn't say goodnight to her properly when I was 16. She tried to kiss me on the cheek and I leant away from her and said goodnight. I didn't want to be kissed.\n\nShe seemed ok with it at the time and just went to bed, but ten minutes later she called me up to her room and told me I had bent her glasses. I'm not sure how. She started getting hysterical and I told her I would talk to her about it when she had calmed down in the morning.\n\nI turn to leave her room and she told me she wasn't done with me, and dragged me back into the room by my hair. I cried out and managed to wrench myself free. I ran downstairs and because my friend was visiting she didn't chase after me.\n\nThe next day after coming home from trying to find a part time job, I heard her talking on the phone to someone, describing the incident. She admitted to pulling my hair, and said that I made, \"The strangest noise.\" then she let me go.\n\nShe then said, \"Oh well.\" and laughed. I didn't say anything about it at the time because I was too scared of being alone with her, but after so much time it still bothers me.\n\nI can let go of everything else, because it's pointless to pretend that she cares about my feelings, but I wanted to know who she would admit that kind of thing to?", "summary": "Mother dragged me by the hair during an argument, admitted it on the phone and laughed. I don't know if/how to confront her about it."}
{"id": "t3_4tglgq", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Visa/criminal record question", "post": "I am applying for a spouse visa to move to the U.K. one of the questions is as follows:\n\n\"Have you received any other penalty in relation to a criminal offence; for example a caution, reprimand. Warning, or similar penalties in the UK or any other country?\"\n\n3 years ago I was in a traffic accident and, not realising I needed to attend court, did not attend court and my license was suspended and a warrant issued for me. However I rectified the situation promptly and sorted everything out. How do I find out if this is still on my record and whether or not to include this information in my application? Do I just need to get a copy of my driving record to see? Will that show me everything I need to know?", "summary": "do traffic violations count as penalty for criminal offence, and what documents do I need to acquire to see if I have in fact been penalized for such?"}
{"id": "t3_12kj4y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (27F) have a BF (24) that likes to chat with girls online and via texts- Any justification?", "post": "I have been with my bf for 5 years now. We have had a somewhat rocky relationship because of distressing situations outside of the relationship (loss of loved ones, job relocation, etc.). However, we are deeply committed to each other. I have no issues with him looking at porn/masturbating. Several times he has confessed to talking to women online, but usually not longer than a week and has no intentions of meeting them in real life. Is this just considered an extension of male fantasies? Like maybe getting turned on because someone else desires him?\n\nI should also mention that he is beyond social awkward. He has almost no friends in reality (and has lost contact with most of the ones he had) and spends a lot of time playing online and console games. It took him half a year to make friends with the people he works with, and he still hasn't socialized with them outside of work.\n\nOh, and the ladies he chats with are not necessarily the most attractive women. They are average to even plain-looking. Part of me thinks he chooses these women because he knows he stands a better chance of them replying to his messages.\n\nWe have discussed most of this before. He knows my feelings and beliefs about it. His reasoning is that \"It makes him feel good.\" I just can't figure out if I am trying to justify his actions too much, or if it is cause for concern.", "summary": "Boyfriend of 5 years chats with females online. Is this akin to porn, or is it something more serious like cheating?"}
{"id": "t3_gp86r", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Having a really crappy day...", "post": "So I'm not having a good day. \nLast night I when I got home from the gym I my computer started Blue Screen of Deathing me every 5 - 10 minutes. I tried to do some Google searches to figure out what was wrong, when I noticed that I have a search engine hijacking virus that routes every link I click on to an IP that tries to get me to download crap and pay for it. I discover today while researching at work that my best bet is to format and start over. Not fun - for a computer nerd who built my own system, it is really bothering me that my baby is hurting and I just want to go fix it ASAP, but won't have time until tomorrow night.\n\nNot only that, I have a stubborn co-worker who started a project that I ok'ed with caveat that we add on a project that I need finished...now he says we won't do what I need done now that we're finished with his project.\n\nThrough all of this all I can think is, \"Dammit, I just want to get to the gym and hit the elliptical and lift.\"  Once I realized I was thinking this...my day got a little better.", "summary": "bad day, realized what I wanted was to get to the gym. Shift in thinking makes day a little bit better."}
{"id": "t3_1aajy1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25f] just found something REALLY disgusting this morning that my boyfriend [26m] left in the living room.", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years and we've been living together for the past few months. Now, generally I've come to accept him for being a 'guy' and not cleaning up after himself. He has got a lot better at it though so I'll give him that. Anyway, this morning I went downstairs as usual to clean up a bit and when I went to pick up the remote off the floor I noticed a white mcdonalds cup sitting next to the chair. Thinking it was just a left over drink I went to go dump it in the sink only to realize that there was piss in the cup. I'm not sure how long it was sitting behind the chair but it smelled REALLY bad. It was pretty much full with ashes at the bottom of it [he smokes]. I don't really know how to go about talking to him about this or how to even bring it up. Advice anyone?", "summary": "Found boyfriends piss cup behind a chair in the living room. Not sure how to ask him about it? REALLY grossed out."}
{"id": "t3_1i3h7i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20m] girlfriend [18f] texts a guy late at night.", "post": "Hell guys, I am unsure how to deal with these emotions I'm having. \n\nShe's told me about her friend before and that she met him last semester. They speak the same native language so that have that in common. Before we started dating they used to hang out, go to the beach, go to downtown and stuff. She says he was interested in her but she made it clear she wasn't. \n\nThrough looking at her social media site (which tells you what time the person was last online and if they are online), I see that he only uses it when he talks to her. When she goes online he is online too, so they talk often late at night from like 12-2 a.m. From looking at it this morning they both were online at around the same time. I am now worrying I feel like they are meeting up and she will hide it from me or something. :/\n\nMy gf has not given me reason to distrust her but one time I texted her and she said she was asleep but clearly they both were online and texting each other. She likes to tell white lies though sometimes, it's just the way she is. I don't know how to bring it up because there's no way I should know of them talking without her feeling like I've been snooping.", "summary": "I've found online statistic that this guy is usually online to talk to my gf. They text late at night, she's told me he is a friend but he used to be uncomfortable. I am now over analyzing and worrying."}
{"id": "t3_38m2hm", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [18/M] have an issue with my girlfriend [18/F] and I dont know what to do", "post": "Its a little bit of a long story, but I'll do my best to make this as short as possible. We have been dating for 10 months, almost a year. She has a lot of guy friends, and whenever she hamgs with them I get extremely mad and bothered. We have talked about this before and she doesnt hang with them as much, but still does every so often.\n\nIt urks me to no end when she does, i know the guys she hangs out with they have girlfriends and are trustworthy guys but no matter who it is, it bothers the shit out of me. \n\nOf course there is a lot more to this, but this is just the jist of it. Idk what to do about it. Do i just deal with it and let it be? Its hard for me to that at all anymore :/ i dont want to fight about it either, we have had a lot in the past already. So what should I do...any advice?", "summary": "My girlfriend has a lot of guy friends, and it bothers me no matter how much we talk about it and such. Idk what to do about it"}
{"id": "t3_3nfibt", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "[25F] is in untold love with my boss[35M] for 5 months. need advice.", "post": "He is not working for anybody. so there won't be any legal issues dating me. but as far as i know, he is not interested in dating coworkers :(\n\nI don't know if he likes me. He is super-nice to me. He is tough with others, if he have to. I am good looking, i guess. I have seen him checking me out,not in a creepy way or anything. I am really confused\n\nI don't know what to do. He care about me, like i am his little sister.That's scary, i guess he think i am a stupid young girl.i guess i talk too much. I don't want to hookup with him for one night.I feel in love with him on my first day with him. I never felt like this before.\n\nHe is a genius, outgoing, he dated a few girls since i met him. nothing serious. i heard that he was in a five year relationship before!\n\nI always compliment him. maybe too much.maybe He knows that i am flirting with him. I don't know if it's flirting, i feel very secure and comfortable around him, at the same time i get nervous around him for having these thought in my mind, all the time. \n\nThis one time, i had to meet him for a coffee to hand him some files. I asked him as a joke \"is this a date?\". he smiled.\n   \nI like my job too. it would be great to have both. :)", "summary": "i am his assistant for 5 months. He is not interested in dating coworkers. I haven't told him anything. any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_4g76zi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19/F] arrange all of our [19/F] dates with my gf of 7 months", "post": "We've been going out for 6 months and we see each other around 1-2 days a week. I always feel the need to propose a time/ place to hangout or else we'll just wont see each other at all. The one time she suggested something is when the place we were suppose to go to was close. She's always happy to see me and when ever shes not free the day I suggest we should go out she'll ask if im free a different day. We've talked about she doesnt arrange dates in month 3 and she did say that she wants to make the plans but since then she never has. Should I refrain from asking her out or talk to her about it again? I so tired of being the one to make plans LIKE im not asking to see her everyday, I just want her to want to see me. I should add that shes super crazy into me. Also, I do have a life outside of her like hanging out with friends, work, sports, uni etc", "summary": "Gf of 6 months has not once suggested to hangout either as a date or as a catch up or anything."}
{"id": "t3_31nm8j", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being oblivious", "post": "So this happened Friday, but I'm just now getting around to posting this. \n\nMy Friend and I went to see F&F7 Friday night. We had to get tickets to the last showing because all others were sold out. So we get in and find some seats at 10:00 PM. At this point, we both had a long day and were exhausted. The movie didn't start til 11, so we just chilled. About half an hour after we sat down, these two really cute girls walk in. We both notice them and start checking them out. Didn't take long for them to spot us checking them out; jokingly, my friend patted the seat next to him. To our surprise, they came and sat down two seats down. Let me reiterate that this is the newest The Fast and The Furious movie. And these two really cute girls just walked in of their own free will, no guys were bringing them to watch it. The movie plays, it is an incredible movie if you grew up watching them like we have. Throughout the entire movie whenever I glanced over at my friend I could see one of them looking over at us. After we get out, it was almost 2 AM. Between talking about the movie and fighting sleep, we completely forgot about the girls who sat down by us and obviously wanted us to talk to them. Went back to my house and he crashed on my couch. When we woke up the next morning, we knew we blew it.", "summary": "Went to see F&F7, two cute girls sat down near us and wanted us to talk to them. We didn't."}
{"id": "t3_29jb4f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my GF [17 F] for 6 months, Left me 9 months ago but a few months ago she contacted me again.", "post": "My first girlfriend of 6 months left me 9 months ago, 7 months into the break up she contacted me again talking to me about what has happened in her life and what not after she left. She then brought up the possibility of her coming back to me. \n\nUnfortunately, we talked a bit more and she said she really wasn't sure so we just stopped talking for a bit. I contacted her again a few weeks later, then she just stopped talking to me. She wont even tell me if she wants me back or not. She just declines my requests on Skype (it was long distance), and wont tell me anything. I am having a hard time moving on with all the thoughts of her being with someone else and I cant get any solace because she wont tell me anything. What should I do? Has this happened to anyone else?", "summary": "GF left me, contacted me a few months later telling me we might get back together, wont answer me even when I really need an answer (depression, emotional distress ect.) what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_51e21t", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "my boyfriend doesn't believe in happy ever after", "post": "Basically I've [22, f] been going out with this guy [28, m] a month, thought he was pretty awesome etc. Was starting to really feel something. \nLast night we got into some deep talking. He said that he had a cynical view on a lot of things, especially love and relationships. Said there was a very high statistical chance that people don't find \"the one\" and don't spend the rest of their lives with someone. I know that this is true, but as someone who grew up with two parents who love each other, and with no divorce in my family at all, I have a very positive outlook on love (his parents had a nasty divorce). \n\nHe also said that, even though he's never had a 6 year relationship, he believes that this is the maximum time you could realistically spend with another person, he said that around the 6 year mark you'd have found out all you need to know about the other person, and there's no real reason to continue a relationship at that point. As someone whos had a 4 and a half year relationship in the past, I feel the opposite and think that at 6 years you would only love the person more and want to spend even longer with them. \n\nI want to just put this down to the age difference. Am I just naive about relationships? Is it okay for him to feel this way? Should I take it to heart or no?", "summary": "bf doesn't believe in long term relationships or marriage, has cynical outlook, I'm the opposite but I feel naive about the subject"}
{"id": "t3_23nokn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I, [16m] finally told [16f] how I feel about her. What now?", "post": "We'll things are definitely looking up! I finally worked up the courage (although barely) to tell my friend how I feel about her! I honestly couldn't be happier! \n\nFrom the our most recent text messages she made it pretty clear it made her day. (Or so I hope) she seems pretty good about it. \n\nI wish I could of told her earlier but she's been going through some things with some guy and I didn't quite want to tell her when she was upset. (Which was almost every chance I got).\nSo that's what I told her and she was shocked to know I was apparently \"the only one to care enough to pay attention and make sure she was ok.\" \n\nWe'll anyways she's just said, \nI hope you understand I can't quite tell you how I feel as I'm still crushed over this whole thing with the other guy.\nSo I'm not so sure what to think about that. Any thoughts?\n\nBut anyways onto my real problem. This is (maybe, not even for sure yet) my first relationship really.. I'm not quite sure what to do. We live in a small town that gets roughly 2500mm of rainfall annually so there's not a lot to do.", "summary": "finally told friend how I feel about her. Her response was a bit iffy but things are good. Not sure what to do when we finally go out."}
{"id": "t3_3u188p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My(26/f) SO (29/m) doesn't understand financial responsibility. How do I get through to him?", "post": "We both are considered middle-class by our individual salaries. Recently he moved in with me and I resigned to go to school. Even without him in the household, going to school full time was something I was pursuing with thorough back up plans. Debt free and all. One thing I didn't account for was his spending habits. I use my take home money to go into bills and living expenses while he burns through his with having nights out with friends and buying me things. I've explained that I'd rather him spend money on me by spending money on the home. He agrees then weeks later spends money on more events and gifts. This is incredibly frustrating. With him now being the breadwinner and older than I  it's very difficult to break through his ego. I'd tell him to get his own place but now after I've calculated he has thrown me into small debt. I'm wondering if I should just kick him out anyway and figure it out. I was much better living alone. I would like to live together financially happily ever after.", "summary": "Individually financially stable. Now living together he's breadwinner I'm unemployed putting me in debt by exclusively spending irresponsibly."}
{"id": "t3_1r4m48", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it possible to develop ADD or ADHD during puberty or the middle of your teens?", "post": "When I was in high school, I was a straight A student and able to understand concepts and think critically about how they apply to the real world but since my Sr year of high school I haven't been able to perform academically in comparison. I often times found myself forgetting my keys or wallet with no recollection of where I had left them and locked my keys in the car more times than anyone I know (it's quite embarrassing when you have to call your ex girlfriend for help to unlock your car because everyone else is busy). \n\n I haven't had health insurance since I was nineteen because that's when Medicaid expired and have been unable to see a doctor about it since it wasn't too much of a concern. As time has gone by, I'm now in my Jr year of college and have found myself unable to pay attention in class for more than probably 7 minutes. It's really become a problem. Forgetfulness has plagued me over the past 3-4 years, as I will frequently be in the middle of doing something and forget why or even what I'm doing. \n\nAnyways, today I asked my friend if I could take one of his ADHD pills because I had a major paper due in a class that would make up for my my poor grade on the only other major assignment in the class. I wound up for the first time in years actually being able to focus on my task without any distraction at all and when I had found myself working on a task that didn't directly pertain to my paper, I was able to easily shift my focus back onto my paper picking up exactly where my thoughts had left off. I think I may have taken too much because of my friend that had ADHD's recommendation and my own impatience but once I had felt the pill take effect, I was able to think and read more clearly than I have been able to in years.  \n In a related question, what effect does television and video gaming have on ADD or ADHD?", "summary": "I took my friends Adderall today and was able to focus and think clearly for the first time since I can remember. Are these normal effects of the study drug or is it possible I might have developed ADD or ADHD in puberty."}
{"id": "t3_4w72l0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22M] mom [47F] found out that I am an Athiest. She is devastated.", "post": "The other day, I was helping my parents move their stuff to their new house, and I brought my laundry over so I could do it there instead of going to the laundromat. The washer and dryer units had been disconnected already, but Mom said she could take my laundry to the rental house and put it in the washer over there. \n\nI forgot that I had my Athiest t-shirt in there which I bought earlier this year to support one of my favorite Youtubers. I've been very careful not to let my Mom see it, but today, I screwed up. \n\nSure enough, she had already washed and folded the clothes before I got there, and she was almost in tears. At first, I tried dodging by telling her that \"Athiesm is Unstoppable\" (which is the phrase printed on the back of the shirt) is just the guy's YouTube username (which it is), and that I don't necessarily associate with Athiesm.\n\n\"Necessarily?!\" she shrieked.\n\nFuck. I shouldn't have worded it like that. I explained to her that I do tend to lean towards \"some\" Athiest ideas after being exposed to them throughout the years. It didn't do much to calm her down. She begged me to not tell my grandmother, and she advised me to get rid of the shirt as soon as possible. \"I didn't raise you this way, catjack, and I'm not going to take credit for any of the ideas you've got in your head. Your grandmother would be mortified.\"\n\nI'm honestly not sure what to do at this point. Mom is extremely sad and disappointed, and I can't really change my beliefs. I could put on an act and pretend that I'm still loyal to God and I still pray at night, but it wouldn't be nearly as convincing now.", "summary": "Mom found out that I am an Athiest due to a t-shirt she came across, and she is urging me to get rid of it to save both of us from the scorn of my grandmother and extended family."}
{"id": "t3_2xxu0f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my BF [20M] of 2 and a half years. I want him to sometimes be more \"manly\" with me. Sort of...", "post": "My [21F] BF [20M] is the sweetest guy I have ever met. He is a very big guy as well which is what attracted me to him before he opened his mouth (He's 6'6\" and 300+ lbs). I love him so dearly and I'm so grateful that I do have someone so wonderful in my life.\n\nI have been very seriously abused by men so my boyfriend (let's call him John) has always been very supportive and is always careful of what and how he says things and now its second nature to him. I have never told John, however, that I am very attracted to the manly man as well as the sweet guy. I would like, when we're alone, for him to carefully man-handle me. I want him to take control sometimes and basically let out his inner Neanderthal a little.\n\nI don't want him think that I like the abuse. It's more the \"chest-beating\" and the \"I'm the man, you're the woman\" attitude that I enjoy once in a while. It's also only in the bedroom/getting to the bedroom when I do enjoy it. Not if we were to be at the grocery store and he says \"So what are you making me for dinner?\" kind of crap.\n\nSorry of that's confusing but I don't really know how to explain it...\n\nWhat I'm asking for is a) how can I better describe this to him? and b) is this something that's okay to ask of him?", "summary": "I want my bf to gently mad-handle me when its just us once in a while... can I ask that and how do I do so without it sounding weird?"}
{"id": "t3_3sdfle", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my Girlfriend [20F] of 2 years, starting to second-guess relationship.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for just about 2 years\u2014she was my first real girlfriend, and the girl I lost my virginity to. I met her online, and we instantly hit it off and could tell that we wanted to meet each other in real life. Our first date confirmed that we had a very strong connection, and from there we became exclusive. From the start, things were going perfect: we'd never ever get into fights, we'd always have a good time, the sex was amazing, etc.\n\nI met her after I graduated high school (right when I went from a very shy overweight kid, to a more confident good looking guy), so she was my first real experience with a girl. At the time, I really wanted to find a relationship with someone I could connect with before losing my viriginity, and she was the right girl. To be honest, at the time I didn't think I'd be here, 2 years in\u2014 still dating her.\n\nRecentley, I've been feeling a little depressed (just lost my job after graduating college, not being able to move out, family problems, etc.) and also a bit \"trapped\" in the relationship. I still love her, and enjoy spending time with her. However, a part of me really wants to end it and experience the single life, spend more time focussing on my career, and just not be in a relationship. The reason I'm here, is because I have never had experience with a scenario like this, and wanted an outside opinion. If I broke things off, I feel like I would be regretting it very soon for making the wrong decision. We've also talked about moving in together, and she always talks about wanting to spend the rest of her life with me.", "summary": "\u2014 Been dating my GF for 2 years, recently feeling 'trapped, want to experience being single, not sure if it'e the right decision."}
{"id": "t3_g5j9g", "subreddit": "self", "title": "If you are a teacher/instructor...", "post": "and a student e-mails/approaches you with literature, a video, a news article, etc. that they thought was interesting because it pertains to something you covered/are covering in class, don't respond with \"That's nice,\" or \"How interesting.\" At least show a little enthusiasm. An exclamation point takes no extra time to type in an e-mail and if a student comes to you during their own free time to show you something they thought was interesting and relevant, chances are they have taken a liking to you. When you show an obvious disinterest in your student, not only are you probably hurting their feelings, you're also chipping away at their interest in education. It wouldn't kill you to take a couple minutes to listen to why they thought their piece was so absorbing. I don't mean to be accusatory, as there are plenty of instructors that do not act like this and show students the respect they need to excel in school (obviously if they deserve it). But if you do act like this, change your attitude. Or go do something else with your life. Or go suck a railroad spike.", "summary": "If you're a teacher and a student brings you something they found interesting/relevant to class, don't be a dickhole about it; show interest in it even if its the most boring piece of shit you've ever seen."}
{"id": "t3_13iy1v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just saved my sister from financial turmoil caused by their insurance company. What good deeds have you done recently?", "post": "Two months ago my sister and her partner got two kittens for their kids. At the same time they called a pet insurance company, and since their economy is not the best, they asked to receive an automatic monthly payment plan.\n\nTo cut that story short, they screwed up and sent an invoice for the entire yearly fee, and forgot to send papers for the monthly plan.\n\nFast forward to last week. They got the kittens neutered at a vet, but one of them had some complications afterwards and they ended up having to perform surgery on it last night.\n\nBut before they went to have that done, they called the insurance company to make sure that everything was alright, and they confirmed that it indeed was.\nHowever, after the procedure was over, the company called and told them that the insurance was not in fact valid. It appears that here was still one day left of the 20 waiting days before it kicks in, which they apparently started counting **after** all their screw-ups.\n\nMy sister was completely devastated by this, as they had to pay the full $2100 medical bill. The only way they had any chance of paying it was to take a loan, which on top of everything had no option of paying back over more than a year, which meant their economy would still be in chaos.\n\nAll of this happened after they had just managed to pay off a ton of other loans and started to their economy sorted.\n\nAfter I came home from work today and heard all of this, I immediately called my sister and told her \"don't worry, I'll foot the entire medical bill\". After hearing this, she just broke down in tears. When she could speak again she started thanking me because of how much it means for them and their economy.\n\nI also said that they should immediately complain to the insurance company to try and get them to pay, since it was their screw-ups that mean the insurance was not valid. But now my sister won't have to worry about how they are going to survive each month while that is going on.", "summary": "I paid a $2100 vet bill for my sister and her family because their insurance was still one day from being valid due to multiple screw-ups by the insurance company."}
{"id": "t3_2ojzqm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my boyfriend [27M] of a year, am I being paranoid?", "post": "I'm afraid this might be a little long. I'll change the name, but unfortunately the details will probably give it away. Regardless, it'll make for some pillow talk either way, right?\n\nAnyway, I've been dating Ahmed (international student from Saudi Arabia) for about a year now. Honestly, we don't really have a solid relationship. Communication is basically absent. I don't think I'd be able to classify it as a \"healthy relationship.\" Still, I enjoy his company.\n\nHe has a lot of friends so naturally, some of them are girls. This doesn't bother me. It's the littlest things that bother me, though. I'll admit that I'm kind of jealous (though, I don't think, overly so). I haven't gone through his phone; but I do oversee him texting occasionally. He has my full name in his phone. The girl he's texting all the time (I don't think a guy would send a kissy face to my boyfriend) is listed as 'Lil mind reader.' Which is kind of weird. He was helping out a friend (also female, judging by her voice) from his undergrad get a plane ticket. I asked him where she was flying to (mostly curiosity) and he deflected. I'm fully willing to admit that I might be paranoid, but he's not all that affectionate toward me (at all) and it seems like he's more committed to these girls than to me.\n\nI hate asking him about this shit because again, I might be paranoid, I'm bad at communication and he's very good at avoiding the question. Reddit, am I paranoid (and please please *please*  tell me if I am)? Should I talk to him? Is there an issue?", "summary": "Boyfriend seems to pay attention to a few other girls than to me, but I'm afraid that I might be paranoid."}
{"id": "t3_19ucrc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (m24) want to break up with my gf (f22) for her sister (f21)", "post": "I've (m24) been dating my gf (f22) for about 14 months and we've had our ups and downs but about 5 months ago I started secretly having sex with her sister (f21). I'm not sure if it's because of the fact that she's the \"forbidden fruit\" that I'm attracted to her, but I've almost decided that I'm going to leave my gf and stay with her sister. Her sister is much nicer to me and is much more adventurous than her sister in many ways. While I know my present gf loves and cares for me deeply, over the past six months or so I found her to become particularly boring (Reading books instead of going out with me and my friends, not wanting to go see movies or concerts, etc.).\nHas anyone else struggled with this? I'm not sure what to do.", "summary": "started having sex with my gf's sister, is it ok to leave my gf and go with her sister?"}
{"id": "t3_2i6ee2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 M] stupidly decided to go through my gf's [30] phone and have found out that she slept with her ex.", "post": "I stupidly decided to go through my girlfriend's messages because she has been going through tough times and has become more and more distant. But she has been on her phone almost constantly. So my damn curiosity got the best of me and boom I'm in her messages. \n\nI find an alternative recount of a night with friends a few weekends ago when I went out of town. She had told me that she hung out with an group of her older friends from earlier times that included an ex-boyfriend. Shr had said a fun night of board games and drinking went too far and before she knew it, she was on a bed with guys trying to get with her (verbally, I guess) but that a good mutual friend of hers who was not as drunk, protected her. \n\nThat apparently didn't happen, I read in a conversation with a friend that she had actually had sex with her ex and was drunk but was kissing back etc. \n\nNow I just feel so hurt. I have set up my entire life around her and have put her first over my friends, family and career. Now I just feel so betrayed. I want to get back at her by sleeping with someone else because a major issue in our relationship is that my girlfriend was concerned that I choose her instead of having a normal bachelor period. I always responded that I only wanted her amd have been faithful through a decent amount of opportunities to stray.", "summary": "Girlfriend got too drunk and slept with her ex. I find out by snooping. Now I just want to self destruct. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4juygj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] feel like I'm an adult by now but many people I know insist otherwise", "post": "I like to think I'm a grown up at this point. I've aced 7 APs in 3 years of high school, hold down a job, and built my own social circle from the ground up. Furthermore, while I don't do 100% of the housekeeping, I contribute greatly. I don't drive, but I'm working on it and hope to stay behind the wheel tons by the end of the year. I look after my disabled brother often and have loaned out a good portion of my checking account to my folks when times were tight. I was suffering from depression and wanted to try tennis, I've paid for a therapist and coach all on my own.\n\nThe point is, between the college-level classes and self-reliance, almost everyone around me insists I'm a child. With my friends and classmates, it's a sort of running joke because of my baby face and my crass sense of humor. They insist I have the maturity of a twelve year old boy despite me having gone through more messed stuff and being more emotionally stable than many of them. While I act silly, I like to think maturity isn't strictly tied to acting solemn 24/7 and because my childhood was hell in a lot of ways (why I grew up in the first place) I can't take a lot of high school drama seriously and don't stress out over academics. Random people I'm loosely acquainted with or talk to at work often think I'm early 20's and talk to me like an actual adult, but people who get to know me better insist I've got the mind of a child.\n\nIs there something I'm missing on? Did I miss out on some unspoken milestone as a child? If I'm indeed just a kid, what does being an adult mean?", "summary": "Despite many \"adult\" traits (looking older, tough classes, a job, emotional stability, etc.) a lot of folks are relatively adamant on me still being a kid."}
{"id": "t3_2lz3yr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] am unexpectedly crushing on my friend[21 F] a few weeks after she got out of a long relationship.", "post": "So I have known my friend for about a year now, but only started hanging out with her a few months ago. She had a boyfriend for about 2 years, and we saw each other for only a few hours a week mostly during classes so I never really got to know her. \n\nRecently, she broke up with her boyfriend and since then we have started texting and hanging out a lot more than usual. Now that we are getting to know each other, I of course am starting to crush on her. Now I am unsure how to proceed. I am not sure if she feels the same way, and either way she probably doesn't want to think about it right now. \n\nShe doesn't talk about her previous relationship a lot, but from the little she said I am pretty sure she was in love with him, but still looking to the future without him a little. I can relate to her situation, having ended a 3 year relationship before, I haven't really had any interests or desires to find someone else until just now.\n\nHow do you think I should proceed? Should I tell her I'm developing feelings for her but put no pressure on her? Should I just keep it to myself? Wait?", "summary": "I am starting to (unexpectedly) crush on a friend I have had for a few months, who I have gotten to really know only recently after she broke up with her boyfriend. How should I proceed?"}
{"id": "t3_e9pod", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I was ripped off by Hotwire.com", "post": "This past September, I decided to spend some time hiking in the Smokey Mountains. While I was there, I would either stay at one of the shelters or I would get a hotel by way of Priceline. On one night, I couldn't get a winning bid on Priceline so I tried on Hotwire.com. I had previously purchased a room through them when I was there in August -- a 3 star that ended up being a nice Holiday Inn with a restaurant. This time, I selected what was presented as a 3-star hotel for the price of $82. When I got there, this is what I found:\n\n3 Star Hotels (according to Hotwire) have pools and restaurants. This was a roadside motel with neither of these. I immediately called Hotwire and informed them this place was not a 3 star hotel. They were no help. \"You agreed to stay in whatever hotel we put you in.\" \"And I agreed to do so under the premise that it was a 3 star hotel. This is not a 3 star hotel. This is fraud.\" I stayed somewhere else to emphasize that I wasn't interested in the ripoff. I tried disputing the charge through Visa and I found out a couple of days that apparently Visa doesn't understand the idea of fraud. As a result, I am going to do a couple of things and that is why I am writing this post. First, I'm spreading my story every place on the internet I know of. I want to make Hotwire lose more than the $94 (after taxes) that I lost as a result of their fraud. Second, I plan to take them to court, but I'm deciding if I'm going to go to small claims or if I am going to go talk to an attorney and seek a class action suit. Thats the reason behind the post. Has anyone else been screwed over by Hotwire?\n\nBTW: I have been using Priceline since 2003. I am currently working a contract out of town and use them every week to book a hotel room. I have never been disappointed with Priceline -- they're great!", "summary": "Hotwire sold me what they offered as a 3-star hotel room and put me at a 1-star hotel."}
{"id": "t3_38clfl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28F] have been asked to be a bridesmaid for my sister's [25F] wedding. Only problem is ex boyfriend's [28M] current girlfriend [25F] has been asked as well.", "post": "So about 5 years ago I ended a 4 year long relationship with ex due to him having feeling for my younger sister. \nHis behavior was sleazy/flirty with my sister and he admitted he had feelings for sister to a mutual friend.\n\nI ended it after I found out that he was a compulsive liar, verbally abusive, physically destructive and after hearing about this infatuation with my sister.\n\nI met a guy a few years later and eventually we got married. \nSister stayed at my mum's house and would have my ex over to play games with her and her boyfriend. \nWhich made it awkward for my partner and I to visit my mum as he was almost always there. \nMum refused to put her foot down so we stopped visiting her.\n\nFast forward a couple years my sister has a new boyfriend now and they are planning to get married. \nShe has told me she is not sure if she will invite the ex and his gf or not. \nMind you they all hang out every weekend and are very close. \nI do not see her excluding them and feel that most people out there would not have to be put in an awkward situation such as this because a breakup is final.\nAm I being stupid?", "summary": "sister is super retarded. Befriended my abusive ex boyfriend and wants everyone to play happy families at her wedding."}
{"id": "t3_3et50u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (18/F) boyfriend (20/M) of three months wants me to pay him back all the money he has spent on me.", "post": "Throwaway Account. \n\nMy boyfriend and I have been together for three months and known each other for eight years. \n\nHe has had a job for three years and his family often deposits some extra cash for him in his bank account. He has close to 15k saved up so far. \n\nI have never had a job up until this summer. I live with a single dad and three other siblings so money is very tight. I am the eldest out of my siblings so it's only my dad and I who work. \n\nOn the very first date I went with my boyfriend, I had offered to pay for my movie ticket. He insisted that I don't have to. He said the same thing for the next couple of movie dates. He even said \"dinner is on me\" on several occasions even though I insisted I could pay for my half of the food/ticket. \n\nMoving along, throughout the entire relationship (thus far) he has paid for me since I didn't have any source of income. We even share a Netflix account for $8.99. I have been keeping track of how much I owe him so I could pay him back as soon as I got a job. It's about $150 (including Netflix). So far I have paid him back $50 in small amounts of money. \n\nNow, the problem is that today he demanded that he needs the money and I pay him back asap. I told him that I'll give him the money back in small instalments and not all at once as I have other responsibilities. He then went on and said he wants all the money from the start (including all the tickets/foods that he insisted I don't pay for...lol wtf. Why would you tell me in the first place to not pay at all if you wanted the money back). He then went on and started questioning me if I will ever pay him back... I told him I will and I have even been keeping track of how much I owe him (he's seen the list).", "summary": "bf suddenly wants money back for all the dinner's/movies which were \"on him\" where he insisted I do not pay even though I offered to pay for myself. Am I suppose to pay him back?"}
{"id": "t3_4nfddp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31 M] with my brother 32 M and mother 58 F] duration whole life. brother uses crystal meth and my mother manipulates me into taking care of him.", "post": "Background:\nMy brother is slow he has an iq of 69 and a normal iq is 70. he receives social security around 900 dollars a month. He rents a house next door to mine. The houses are located on the same property. He actively does crystal meth with my drug dealing neighbors down the block. My mother is an enabler giving my brother groceries and money. From a young age she instilled into me that family takes care of family. She continues to enable my brother by trying to manipulate me into believing that i need to take care of him.\n\nThe problem:\nSo my brother has been using again. His dealer/friend came up to me and decided to tell me he was using again. Not much he said but you know just a little. The drug use has changed him into a person i dont want to be around. i want to distance myself from him because of the drug use and his overall personality from it. I'm thinking of just staying away from both my mother and my brother. so how do i do it? how did you do distance yourself from negative family members? i don't want to just block and ignore more like a slow distancing process.", "summary": "Brother uses drugs and mother enables his behavior by buying him shit and guilting me into helping him. How do i distance myself?"}
{"id": "t3_3d6f91", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20M) cheated on and lied to my girlfriend (18F) of 2 years badly and dont know what to do anymore", "post": "I am gonna be very blunt. Please dont tell me in the comments what an asshole I am or how badly i treated her i know this very much.\n\nOur relationship started well and we were pretty happy together. About six months in the relationshipi cheated on her two times with one of her friends (not very close). I texted with this girl throuought the 2 years a few times mostly sexual things. I didnt tell my GF and 3 month ago about 2 years in the relationship it all came out. I continued to lie to her and only told her bits and bits and wasnt ever honest to her.\n\n When she found out she broke up immedieatly but couldnt let go so we \"came back together\" more or less after 3 or 4 days. But at that point she still didnt know everything e.g. the writing things and one of the major things, that i texted the girl she should come over on the day of the first breakup. So she broke up with me again. Only at this point i told her everything. After a little bit silence (one week or something) we came back together again, this time for 2 months. We even had a vacation at the sea. But then on the day she finished school she broke up with me again because she said she cant forgive me and she cant forget it.\n\n She isnt angry anymore but just cant do it anymore. Now two weeks ago, about one week after the 2nd breakup we spend the whole week together, e.g. at the lake or in the park or at home and texting all the time but at Sunday last week she suddenly stopped texting for three days and tells me on Wednesday its over again. Fort he 2 years weve been together the only thing she is talking about is that she wants to move away for university as soon as possible. This is in approx 2 months. I am just afraid to lose her ( i know that shit sounds stupid) and i dont know what to do or how to act anymore.", "summary": "I cheated and lied to my gf badly. We came back together two times and i am asking myself if i should hope/act on a third time or what to do to cope."}
{"id": "t3_10mwf6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend [25F] bought a rabbit.  How can I [26M] deal with her wanting to spend time with it at her apt and me wanting her to spend time with me at my apt?", "post": "Hi everyone.  I know, it's such a silly thing to worry about a bunny, ha, but here goes.  My girlfriend just bought an adorable little bunny, and I like the little guy as well.  We usually sleep at each others' places since we only live a few miles away from each other.  Short story is that I like my place, a nice clean studio, and she likes her place, a house full of people with a lot of character.  We manage by spending time at each others' places pretty evenly.  Anyway, in the past she's had a habit of planning gatherings at her house with her friends/roommates that ends up meaning she's going to sleep at her place, which is fine, except that a few times she's planned these things several days in a row.  She's gotten upset at me in the past for wanting to hang out at my place.  I've called her out on it, basically telling her that if she wanted to hang out with her roommates and sleep with at her place, that it was fine, but that didn't change the fact that I wanted to hang out at my place, and maybe we needed to sleep separately sometimes.  We have been dating for about a year, and are in love with each other.\n\nAnyway, she has admitted that she can be selfish at times, but has done pretty well at understanding what I want recently.  However, I'm worried that she's going to use her new bunny as an \"excuse\" to spend more time at her place.  What is a good way to manage my worries and express my concern/wants to her if a similar situation of her always wanting to spend time at her place and expecting me to come over arises?", "summary": "GF just bought a bunny, and has been selfish about spending nights at her place in the past.  I'm worried that this new animal will cause a similar situation and want to know the best way to deal with it."}
{"id": "t3_15yj3w", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What do you think the consequences of the irreparable and reparable damage that humans are doing?  Which future do you think will happen due to this: Total destruction of the planet or a massive reset?", "post": "To explain:\n\nWe all know that not everything that dies will turn into a fossil fuel or fossil or anything like that.  However some things do.  We also know that the Earth goes to transitions that are normal, some destructive, but through the destruction new branches of evolution come and in some cases go.  \n\nMy husband and I were talking about this yesterday after a debate on a Justice Files case (lol).  If the Earth was to have another huge 'change' would the damage we're doing to it prevent it from doing what needs to be done to ensure the future of the planet?  Have we damaged the Earth to the point where it wont be able to make it to the next level of evolution?\n\nAt any rate, the question simple is:", "summary": "What do you think the consequences of the irreparable and reparable damage that humans are doing?  Which future do you think will happen due to this: Total destruction of the planet or a massive reset?"}
{"id": "t3_50uygo", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do you casually ask if you're dating or not?", "post": "On mobile, sorry for formatting.\n\nSo me and this guy have been \"seeing each other\" for the past couple of weeks. Nothing sexual really has happened yet. But we talk all the time about how happy we are with each other. Only problem is, I'm not entirely sure if we are technically dating in his eyes or not. We agreed in the beginning to take it slow and I pretty much said to him that I didn't need a status between us because it's not gonna change how I feel about him. But last night shit went down and he said he was ready. So I'm not sure exactly what that meant. \n\nIs there a \"proper\" way of asking or is it something I should just let go for now until he says something?", "summary": "I'm not sure if I'm dating this guy or not and I'm wondering if and how I should find out."}
{"id": "t3_167rct", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, will you help me make a March Madness Tournament for charity?", "post": "For years, my dad would run the office pool for March Madness. Though it was a casual office activity with a low $5 or $10 buy-in, he would wake up every morning to listen to the radio to record the results and score each bracket by hand. There are websites that do all the work for you now, but he was a purist. This past tournament was his last bracket, as he passed away from cancer in April. I'd love to remember him by having a bracket tournament in his honor.\n\nMy idea is to have a $5 entry fee and have half the money go towards the prize pool and the other half go towards a cancer research charity (suggestions for which one is best would be appreciated, I was thinking JimmyV.org since he was a basketball coach). I wanted to host it with his at least former coworkers, but they work for a newspaper in Germany, so the number of potential participants is dwindling. It would be more lucrative if more people from around the world were involved. Where should I start? What should I do to host the brackets? Am I allowed to do this, or is it considered gambling? I'm sure I can find out a lot of this through research, but I trust the results of Reddit collaboration better. Please help me. Thanks Reddit!", "summary": "I want to host a massive public March Madness fundraiser with half the money going to cancer research and the other half up for grabs. Any suggestions/help would be appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_2kxrz1", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I Know You're Supposed to Ask Her Out Face to Face, But...", "post": "Sorry if this is in the wrong place.\n\nIts a pretty standard story. Guy likes girl, guy is pretty sure girl likes him they talk a little bit, neither makes any overt statements, guy fails to ask girl out for a while.\n\nLogically I know that I want to ask this girl out. I've looked up all sorts of things to help with social anxiety and they help a little, but not enough. I can start conversations with her sometimes and that's nice and all but the pressure always stops me from asking her out.\n\nThe caveat: I have her phone number, she has mine, and I could ask her out over text no problem. I probably would eventually work up the [whatever you think it takes to overcome social anxiety] to ask her out in person, but I'm afraid it will take a while, and for a variety of reasons I don't want to wait long.", "summary": "is it better to risk waiting a while to work up the courage to ask her out in person, or to just ask her out over text now? I'm in high school if that makes a difference."}
{"id": "t3_czmrm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "what should I do about my lazy land lord?", "post": "Basically, my refrigerator broke\u2026 more than a month ago. I told my landlord immediately after it happened and he said he would send a repairman to look at it. I had to leave for 2 weeks but my roommate (who is can be pretty lazy himself) was home the entire time. Nobody came to look at during that period and my roommate never followed up with the landlord (which was his fault). I got back and talked to the landlord again and he was surprised that the repairman didn't come and said he would take care of it. Finally, after another week and another discussion with the landlord, the repairman came said the refrigerator was broken and we would need a new one. Long story short, our landlord has now told us he is going to buy a new fridge as soon as possible, but it has been a week and half since then and still no fridge. I'm going to talk to talk to him today (in angry tone \"grrrr\") but I want to know what contractual rights I have as per our lease or some renters legislation, so I can light a fire under his ass. It has been a month since I have had a cold beer...what has the world come to?", "summary": "My fridge broke in my apartment a month ago and the landlord hasn't repaired it after numerous discussions\u2026.I JUST WANT A COLD BEER! What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_133bdb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How long/What can I say to friend after drunk hook up?  I'm a bit confused (21m/21f)", "post": "Hi everyone, I just ended up making out and cuddling with a friend at a party the other night.  Things got rather kinky.  The next day though, we hung out with some friends and everything seemed different.  She was acting a little more friendly/touchy and playful than she has before around me.  \n\nI know we both remembered what happened, but we never brought it up.\n\nI really enjoyed our time together, and would love to hang again- but I have no idea how long I should wait to text her or what to say at this point apart from something like \"hey, looking back I actually really had a nice time the other night, hope everything's been well and you did too\"", "summary": "Friend and I made out and cuddled drunk.  I liked spending time with her and want to ask her out, but I've never been in this situation before and I'm lost :("}
{"id": "t3_szw76", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My longtime cat is now a nightmare, she has peed on everything and my family has left it to me to take care of this problem. How should I go about this?", "post": "I rescued this cat off the street seven years ago and begged my parents to save her. Which is why I'm responsible for my cat and will have to decide what to do about her excessive peeing problem. The thing is, she's an outdoor-indoor cat so she has never before peed in our house until recently. She has always done her business somewhere down the street from us. \n\nYesterday she peed in my sister's purse, in her bed, and on a bunch of her clothes. She jumped on the kitchen counter and peed on my nephew's baby bottles. She peed on all the towels my parents use and in their shower. She peed in all of our showers. ***That's not the worst part!*** My sister didn't realize the cat peed on her shirts (it had dried by then) and wore one of them to work. And my mother didn't know the cat peed on the towel she had used to dry herself after taking a shower - that was until she saw the kitchen and figured out the strange smell of her towel was, in fact, pee. Everyone in the house wants that cat put down.\n\nI would be the one to have to put her down and I don't want to do it. My cat is mean, she is annoying, and has ruined every couch and dining room chair we have had. Yet I don't want to put her down because in the past two months I've had four of my dogs pass away (from old age) and another one is on the way. \n\nI set up a cat litter box for now but what else can I do? Should I have her checked by the vet? (it's about $160..and $400 if they run blood tests) I've never had to euthanize a pet before but it seems so..wrong I guess to do it because of a peeing situation.", "summary": "My childhood cat is now a nightmare, she has peed on everything. How should I go about fixing this? Is it even possible to train an old outdoor cat to now use a litter box?"}
{"id": "t3_17w4t0", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[23/F] my SO [22/M] says he doesn't think he will ever fall in love with me. Help?", "post": "My SO and I have been dating for four months. I've been emotionally invested in our relationship for seven months, so needless to say, I'm on a deeper level than he is. He is a fantastic guy - very caring, very sweet, always fun for me to be around. I care about him deeply (although I'm not sure if I would call it love. It's probably something very, very close). Anyway, after a round of awesome sex last night, we had a discussion on whether or not we would get past the \"I like you,\" level to the \"I love you,\" level. His response was \"Probably not.\" He admits that I'm a good girlfriend, the best he's ever had, but that he doesn't feel those romantic feelings.\n\nWhile I'm sure those feelings could or could not develop, I don't want to get my hopes up about a miracle happening.\n\nWhat I've decided is that I care about my SO, we have fun together, and he says that he still has intense feelings for me, just not that intense. I'm moving to a big city in August, and I had planned on staying with my SO until that time and THEN deciding what to do. Since that decision has pretty much been made for me (if he can't fall for me, we won't stay together) I need some advice on how to make my relationship more casual.\n\nI don't mean sleeping around or being in an open relationship, I mean, are any of you in a casual relationship that you don't necessarily see going anywhere? How do you maintain the feeling of being in a relationship without falling any further emotionally? I just need a way to scale back my girlfriendly duties so that I can save my heart a little bit of trouble by not getting any deeper.", "summary": "my boyfriend doesn't think he'll ever fall in love with me, but we still have mutual feelings for each other. How do I have a casual relationship with him that won't let me fall any deeper than I already am?"}
{"id": "t3_2zr7nn", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being crunk for my sisters birthday at Six Flags", "post": "Well I'm actually the sister telling the story but anyways. For my birthday, I decided to go to Six Flags. My brother inclined that I should take some drugs before we go. I declined due to the fact that my older sister would be there and she would fuck my shit up if she found out. So my brother takes shrooms, smokes weed, acid, and drinks booze before we go. My brother either has a high tolerance or is just weird for acting pretty normal in public, so that wasn't the issue. The problem was he had his pipe in his pocket and we were on superman when it fell out. I heard something fall but thought nothing of it till he gave me that fuuuuuuuuuuuuck look. That is when an employee picked up the piece and I knew instantly it was his but they hadn't said anything so the ride continued on. After the ride finished, nothing happened. We had to wait for my sister but right as she was coming so did security which then escorted my brother out. My brother is an idiot but he apologized profusely and felt bad he ruined my day. He didn't ruin it, he made my day better with his dumb actions. And no they did not give back the pipe. I wish they did.. I loved that pipe :(", "summary": "Family went to Six Flags. Brother brought beautiful, marijuana pipe which fell on to the dirty ground of superman. He got kicked out. My sister flipped her shit at him."}
{"id": "t3_4rkjke", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to end a toxic friendship between me (25/F) and former best friend (24/F)", "post": "My former best friend I'll call her Jenny used to hang out with me all the time. We always got dinner together at least once a week and she was really close to my parents as well. Lately I've noticed since she got another new bf (she's had a string) that she's stopped responding to any texts I've sent her or trying to hang out. It seems her only focus is on said boy. \n\n[break] However, she will come back into my life if the boy breaks up with her for comfort and then will go away again as soon as she finds someone else. She's done this before and admittedly it was my fault for letting her do it, but I'm just sick of being used whenever she needs comfort from being dumped. Do you guys have any suggestions how to end this toxic friendship?", "summary": "My friend only wants to hang out when she's dumped and not when she has a bf and I'm sick of it."}
{"id": "t3_k6c16", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Need advice: I want to be in a relationship, but she wants to be single after getting out of last relationship", "post": "Hey Reddit, would really appreciate some advice on my situation.\n \nThe facts: \n-I (M21) have known a girl (20) for just over a year and liked her the whole time.\n\n-She was in a relationship from when I met her until just recently.\n\n-We have started talking more this semester (we attend the same college and are in the same major) and she has been pretty flirty as far as I can tell.\n\n-She would casually mention she was single, that her roommate was never there and she was lonely and I should hang out with her.\n\n-Eventually worked up the courage to ask her out (I'm very shy) and we went on a lunch date over the weekend.\n\n-We talked after, and she mentioned that she had only been single a week (I thought she had been for about a month), which raised some red flags (I was the rebound guy in my only other significant relationship).\n\n-Then told her how I felt and that I didn't want to be her rebound guy, and asked how she felt etc.\n\n-She replied that she wanted to be single after being in LTRs several times and that she wanted to be just friends. Also said she wanted \"just fun\". I'm not sure what that means.\n\nSo, Reddit, what should my mindset be and what should I expect going into the next few weeks? On one hand, this girl and I have a somewhat ridiculous amount of things in common and I think we could be great together, but on the other hand I don't want to be a rebound guy for her or be led around until she finds someone else as has happened to me in the past.\n\nAny advice would be great!", "summary": "Girl I've liked for a year got out of a relationship a week ago and acted pretty flirty, but when confronted said she wants to be single and have fun and just be friends."}
{"id": "t3_2dfq5q", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by sending my sister an SOS text", "post": "Some background, I recently upgraded from the Galaxy S4 to the S5, which has this cool emergency feature when you press the lock button three times. You set up who you want the texts to go out to, it gives out your coordinates, a front facing picture, a rear facing picture, and sound of what was going on when you pressed the button. I decided it was a good idea to add my boyfriend and sister, just in case! \n\nSo, for our anniversary, my boyfriend rented us a room on the beach. We were about to start some sexy time when I decided I wanted some background music. I pull up spotify, lock the phone, and put it on the nightstand. The music stops and there's a new notification. \"EMERGENCY DECLARED\". *ooohhh no....*. Knowing that it takes pictures, I quickly try to get it away from my boyfriends junk, and away from me. I saved his dignity, but it was too late for me. A picture of my nipples in fishnet lingerie was sent to my sister, along with whatever sound was going on. I called her, and no answer, I texted her to ignore that SOS. \n\nNeedless to say, the moment was ruined. Everytime we tried to get back into it, we would laugh, so we just sat back and watched shark week. All in all, it was a good trip!", "summary": "put music for sexy time, sent SOS text to my sister that included picture of my nips. Night ended with watching Shark Week."}
{"id": "t3_3g0ayc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] am in love with the feeling of someone falling in love with me and it's shitty", "post": "Cutting straight to the point, I am probably the worst person because what I do damages both me and is a lie to the girl. In the past I've had a series of girlfriends that I haven't particularly loved. I always thought that my problem was that being a nerdy guy, I just liked having someone show interest in me. But I realise now that it's somehow worse -- I court that feeling, when you realise that the person is drawing down their barriers, letting you in, and really falling in love with you. You never know someone until they fall in love with you.\n\nWhere does this leave me? I can label myself as an asshole, or at the very least as someone who really shouldn't be going out with people until I can sort this out now that I'm aware of it. So I'm not interested in hearing how I'm an asshole. Where else does it leave me? It leaves me in long term relationships with lovely girls, but I have no idea what it's like to properly love someone of my own accord. Or perhaps I should say to love someone on their own accord. So it doesn't exactly leave me in a good spot either.\n\nDoes anyone have any insight? Why I might be like this, what I can do. Every girl I've been with has absolutely loved me, and I have been a very good boyfriend because that's what I love to do, so it's not like the relationships are any different for this. I just don't always get the person that I'm looking for, because I 'settle' when there is a girl falling in love with me? I don't know. Any thoughts?", "summary": "I go through life trying to make girls love me because that makes me feel incredible. What I want to do is find someone that I love, and then try to make them love me back. Any thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_3apfuq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[27 F] Broke up with me [25 M] after approx 1.5years, doesn't love me anymore", "post": "Hi I'll try and keep this short.\n\nShe had some doubts setting in a couple a months ago but instead of talking with me buried her feelings because she didn't want to hurt or nag me - she then grew distant which caused me to be a bit needy (I know, I know!).\n\nI want it to work but she has said \"If I really loved you I shouldn't need to think about it\" - but she's also said that she was in love with me before. I want us to go no contact for a while and slowly build back to what we had if possible. The difficulty is we are going to a festival together for 5 days now and can't really do anything about that!\n\nI gave her a letter describing my feelings yesterday and now we have to kind of set this aside and try and enjoy ourselves and each others company.\n\nAny advice? I guess I want to try and act normal / friend-ish and not be asking her about her feelings or smothering her.", "summary": "GF broke up with me, doesn't love me anymore not sure exactly why, can't go no contact yet. Help me not make it worse while we are around each other!"}
{"id": "t3_26b3qg", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by squirting expired fish oil all over my face.", "post": "So I found a bottle of fish oil supplements...\n\nI was curious as to what they were because I had never seen them in the form they came in.  They were in little oil filled pearls that are incredibly fun to try and fuck with.  I'm a sucker for anything that is squishy like Laundry detergent packs.\n\nSo naturally, I tried to pop it.  BAD. FUCKING. IDEA.\n\nI finally get it to pop and a little jet of oil shoots out.  On my face.\n\nThe smell hits me like a truck.  This overwhelming fishy odor, like someone left a halibut out to dry in the sun and forgot about it.  Immediately, I can feel the smell bringing on nausea.  I run to the toilet, but to no avail.  I throw up right outside the bathroom doorway.  \n\nI had just come back home from dinner so there was quite a lot to vomit.  I tried to inch closer to the porcelain refuge of the toilet, but the force with which my body is spewing vomit makes it hard for me to make it.  \n\nI slump over on my bathroom floor covered in vomit and fish oil.  By this point, the smell has triggered an extremely painful migraine.  \n\nMy only course of action was to clean myself and then the house.  \n\nI hop in the shower and desperately try to wash the stink off my face, but it is no use.  It's seeped in.  I literally cannot rid the fish smell with any amount of soap and water.  It's like I was sprayed by a skunk.  A really fishy skunk.\n\nSo I re-dressed myself and cleaned the trail of vomit off the floor.  The spray pattern of my spew spread across the floor like a freshly wet crime scene.  Slippery.  Noxious.  Ugh.  It still makes me sick to remember the smell.", "summary": "I popped a fish oil pearl on my face.  It made me vomit like that chick from The Exorcist."}
{"id": "t3_4rmlun", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24M] and my girlfriend [23F] of 4+ years have slowly been having less open communication. Who is being unreasonable? Other opinions?", "post": "We began dating right after 1st year Uni, dated 1 year then broke up for 6 months over differences in expectations for how long our dating would continue before marriage.\nI lean toward a shorter dating preference (1.5-3yrs) by which point I feel I would have decided on way or the other. She feels more that every other aspect of her life (career, school, family, financials...) must be perfectly in place to accommodate marriage regardless of how long that takes. \n\nAfter getting back together and being more clear that I would be willing to date happily until she felt her life was in order if she was considerate of me not wanting to date just to hold off marriage. and things have been going relatively well since then (3+ years since). We have travelled together, spent family holidays together and always been in open communication about our motivations, opinions, aspirations and disagreements. We have not lived together.\n\nSince 1-2 months ago we have been slowly having more and more difficulty with our depth/frequency of conversation and it is making her very uncertain about our relationships future and how much I care for her.\nI am someone who is very easygoing, patient, I feel loved by just spending quality time (out of the house especially) together a few times per week and doing random acts of kindness. I would only expect to have a thought provoking and deep conversation with my closest friends and family perhaps 1 time per month, and somewhat more with my SO.\nShe is someone who is very critical thinking, loves hugs and being complimented, and is always excited to just sit and talk about anything that comes to mind for a long time as long as the conversation is stimulating.\n\nIt does not, to me, feel like we've been having fewer conversations but she tells me I have been less ready to participate actively and less giving of my time for such conversations. I feel that such an intense level of conversation just isn't sustainable, she feels it's necessary. We plan to attend couples counselling this month for the first time.\n\nIs this normal? Is it a real problem or is one of us being unreasonable? Can anyone relate? I really do love her and want this to work.", "summary": "My girlfriend and I have developed different ideas about what a healthy amount of conversation is and what a deep conversation involves. "}
{"id": "t3_vw77l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Visiting Clearwater Beach, Florida and having a kickass time at the beach. What are some beach stories you have?", "post": "This one comes from the beach down in Corpus Cristi, TX: We were there on a band trip during my freshman year. We decided to have a game of beach ultimate and split up basically seniors versus freshmen.\n\nLate into the game, one senior guy is streaking up the beach toward the endzone and the disc gets hucked to him. It flies out over the water, where my friend Charlie proceeds to lay out parallel to the ground, and make a spectacular flying swat to save the point.\n\nSorry if that had a little too much Ultimate jargon in it.", "summary": "Playing Ultimate on the beach when the disc gets thrown long, and Charlie saves the day, puts his body on the line, and prevents seniors from scoring"}
{"id": "t3_pkjb6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, tell me what to do.", "post": "Let me first say that I am losing my reddit submission vcard on this.  I am currently in a predicament with being in-between jobs and am turning to you guys/gals for advice.  For the last couple months I have been strung out by a (going to be unnamed) company.  In this time, I've been assured of my qualifications, but been told that my background check is taking a long time (my record is clean, no worries).  However, as much as I am assured, I feel like they have been taking their sweet precious.  In the mean time I applied for other jobs, and this week one came up with Red Lobster.\n\nI started training with RL on Thursday thinking that I wasn't going to hear from the other employer.  Of course they call me the next day saying the background check is almost done, and they would be calling me early next week. Still, no definitive offer/set date of employment.\n\nMy question is: should I still stick with RL or go ahead and let them know I'm turing down the job?  Honestly, I don't want to waste their time, but also dont want to be left in the situation where I may get strung out again. \nI really want the job with the unnamed company because it pays more/better benefits.", "summary": "Prospective job taking long time, another one comes along that I'm just starting. Prospective job calls back, but not set in stone."}
{"id": "t3_1p8ucq", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Orange County, California] Battery and attempted car theft?", "post": "So tonight I (18) went with my buddy(17), we will call him A, to go pick up some money from another minor(16), we will call him M . He owed my buddy $20 and was completely glad to give him the money. Here's where things changed:\n\nI went across the street to go take a leak against a large wall in a greenbelt between houses, no big deal, when a woman comes out asking what I was doing. I assumed that she was going to call the cops on me for public urination, however, she actually thought I was hiding a bag of marijuana for M (I don't even involve myself with what the law considers drugs). She immediately grabbed me and attempted to take my car keys from my pock, but I pushed her off. She then approached A and tried to get into his car because he had a brown bag that he was taking out of his car, which, again, did not contain anything illegal. \n\nI already understand that I could have filled battery charges against her, but what would the attempt at taking my keys be considered attempted auto theft? There were multiple witnesses that saw her attack me.\n\nThanks.", "summary": "Woman mistook my actions for something they weren't, assaulted me and then tried to steal my car keys. What charges could I possibly file?"}
{"id": "t3_wb3gw", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "2-3 year old dog is growing very attached, jealous. Tips or tricks to help her overcome this?", "post": "My boyfriend and I rescued a dog from a local animal shelter a few months ago. She was listed as a stray German Shepherd mix, and we think she is likely a GS/lab/pit mix. They estimated that she was around 2-3 years old, but since she was a stray, they didn't know for sure. They found her just wandering around the city we live in. \n\nAnyway, she has been doing GREAT since we brought her home. She was timid for awhile, but has grown to love and trust us and our friends, and has overall become a pretty awesome dog (no accidents, is trying to get along with our cat, etc.). As I was working a lot and my boyfriend was home more often, he wound up feeding her more frequently, although we both take her out and play with her.\n\nThe thing is, she has grown incredibly attached to my boyfriend. She is normally excited to see him, which is fine, but she follows him around all of the time and cannot take her eyes off of him. Even if I am playing with her or petting her or engaging her, if he is there, she is staring at him. Earlier today, when he leaned in to kiss me, she started making noises to try to get his attention. Whenever he leaves, she whines a little.   \n\nHe is starting a new job soon and will not be home as often. We want to help her become less attached to my boyfriend so that she knows he will always come back, and so that she doesn't have to feel so anxious (it's like she is constantly looking to my boyfriend for approval) when we're home. Does anyone have any suggestions, tips, or tricks to help her become more comfortable with my boyfriend's absence and less attached to him?", "summary": "Shelter dog, very attached to bf, bf's starting a new job and not going to be around as much. How do we help our dog be less attached to my boyfriend? "}
{"id": "t3_2wsvvi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my 24 [F] of 4 years keeps putting off moving in together.", "post": "Almighty Reddit, lend me your ears..\n\nThrowaway on the off chance she goes to reddit, goes to this particular sub and see this specific post...\n\nThe Turn:\n\nSo we've been together for almost four years now. Awesome relationship, insanely close all those good things. A couple of  rough patches but we persevere. Girlfriend, who was living with her friends, had to move home because of a teaching internship she received, no pay only stipends towards her grad school.  \n\nThe Pledge:\n\nSo last June my lease was up and I wanted to move out of into a better area without my college friends. My girlfriend is ecstatic, we talk about moving in together.\n\n Awesome possum, we find a nice place close central to both of our jobs.  She lets me know she won't be able to pay her full share of the rent due to aforementioned internship. Ain't no thang. I can front the bills and she can chip in what she can. We both sign the lease.\n\nLease starts in September, due to school and shit, her move in date is December, I'm cool with it cause well I am. Well December turned into a January move in...which turned into a February move in...which turned into a beginning of March...which turned into end of March.\n\nThe Prestige:\n\nSo I just got off the phone with her about an hour ago and the topic of her move in came up because I need to request time off from work to help (retail manager :0 ). Well she doesn't think she can do March now. What the actual hell. \n\nI want to get on with our lives but she keeps coming up with excuses. I am not getting married until I know I can live all the time with her. I'm frustrated about what I should do. I don't want to give her an ultimatum  because I do love her but at some point I need to know if this relationship can bump up to the next level i.e. marriage. At this point I'm trying to figure out if there's something wrong with me, our relationship, or her. Any input?", "summary": "Girlfriend adopted a platypus and doesn't think my Siberian Husky and it will get along. She doesn't want to move in until we figure it out."}
{"id": "t3_35mrj5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO[18, F] talked to me [19, M] about my porn use and masturbation habits. She has become upset and I need help on how to talk to her about it.", "post": "Porn and masturbation just came up in conversation, and she asked me about how often I use porn and masturbate. I am completely honest with her about everything, so I told her: At least once a day.\n\nI don't think I'm over doing it in any way. I'm a college student with a lot of pent up sexual tension during the week, especially because my girlfriend lives 2 hours away and I can only see her on weekends. I have a high sex drive, and I think of and use masturbation as a stress relief. Among my male friends, my masturbation frequency is very normal. It doesn't get in the way of school or personal relationships, nor does it get priority over anything I get to do with my girlfriend.\n\nSince she has learned this new information, she has been upset and wants to talk with me about it tonight.\n\nShe is a very emotional thinker, which can sometimes make explaining things a little more difficult.\n\nSo I turn to all of you. I could use some help in how I talk to her about my habits to leave her in a peace of mind about us and our future.\n\nThanks in advance.", "summary": "Girlfriend is upset about my frequency of masturbation and porn use. She isn't completely understanding the role it plays in my life, and I need assistance on how to talk to her about it."}
{"id": "t3_1uqc6i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34 F] with my BF 40 M 2 months, political differences, deal breaker?", "post": "While we were talking about different things last night, the topic came on politics and he told me Sarah Palin has some good ideas and that if stopped watching Jon Stewart or Tina Fey making fun of her that I would be able to see that. Took me by surprise as I think she is dumber than a box of rocks and I really don't like her and some of things that she has said. I didn't make a big deal out of it because it was last and I was tired. This morning I sent him a text saying that I still couldn't believe he was a Sarah Palin supporter. We went back and forth quite a bit with him not really giving anything solid about why he supports her and me giving examples of why she is bat shit crazy and quoting some of the stupid things that she has said. The last few text where it seemed we weren't getting anywhere:\nHim: It's your opinion, I don't agree with it.\n\nMe: And that's fine we are entitled to our opinions your opinion seems baseless and I thought I would hear something that I may have overlooked or not seen before on this subject but it just shows how some people accept things blindly without really knowing.\n\nHim: I'm fine with that\n\nMe: Yeah that's fine whatever\n\nThat last one was sent an hr ago and no reply back from him. \nI think this may be the end of it but I just think it's silly and wanted to see what others thought.\nThe weird thing is, I don't care about politics and normally don't even get into it with people, I don't really identify with republican or democrat. He has said the same thing that he is neither republican nor democrat but uses the word the \"left\" in a way that he views them as differently than to himself. So I think his views are more to the right. He is the first person that I have ever come across that has defended her. \nSo anyways, is something like this a deal breaker for people?\nI don't think he is going to reply to my text, should I say something to him even though I feel kinda strongly about this?", "summary": "Different political views specifically on Sarah Palin, I hate her, he \"respects\" her. Heated argument via text and now he is not speaking to me. "}
{"id": "t3_1ypnca", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24 F] unsure what to do about [33 M] off and on for over a year, he's been acting weird and I came across confession of love for his ex.", "post": "I have been dating my boyfriend off and on for over a year. We were friends for a while before we started dating. We've had a lot of problems because of his drinking and when I felt under-appreciated after exhausting myself taking care of him when he was having medical problems, and once when some girl kept sending him naked pics and he didn't discourage it. So we've broken up a couple times. \n\n   I keep getting back together with him because I do love him very much. He's the first person I've been willing to pursue a future with. He asked me if i'd be willing to follow him wherever he got a job (He's getting his doctorate and will need to go wherever he can find teaching positions). I agreed to it. He's told me he wants to marry me and have kids and the whole future bundle. I've never wanted that before, but with him, I do.\n\n  Recently he's been acting strange he said he wanted to move in together, but when I brought up some places I'd found he seemed uncomfortable and weird, he hasn't talked about the future at all the past month and seems distant.\n  This morning his phone was making noises and I went to go look at it (we don't have issues with phones, he plays with mine all the time.) His text menu was open and I saw that he'd recently sent a text to his ex from 5 years ago who he was pseudo engaged with but they broke up after some of her infidelity during long distance. He told her that he \"Still thought about her every second of every day\" and that he missed her so much and begged her to call him.I know they aren't interacting physically because she lives in another state, but I don't know how to handle finding this out. He was asleep when I saw it and I just got my things, left him a note about how I saw the texts and how his behavior is cruel and I left. I'm at my house now and I'm a total wreck. I still love him and believed he wanted a future with me. I don't know what to do and I feel like an idiot.", "summary": "Boyfriend initiated a serious relationship, life plans, etc. Has been acting weird in the past month. Found a text to his ex confessing his continued love."}
{"id": "t3_1avdtz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Just told my conservative parents that I'm moving in to my boyfriend's house, and I would really appreciate an outside view of the situation.", "post": "I (21 f) have been living on my own for the last year in an apartment with some roommates. I am currently enrolled at a prestigious private college, and am maintaining a 3.7 GPA while I've been living out of a drawer at my boyfriend's place. He provides little distraction from my dream of graduating with my two bachelor degrees in a year and a half. I have been dating my boyfriend (22) for two years, and we have been discussing our future and the possibility of moving in together since November. He has asked me to pick out a ring, and I anticipate him asking me at any time.\nI come from an extremely conservative family (think \"Southern Belle\" mentality), and I knew I wouldn't be met with a hug and cheers. But while I was alone with my father for a four hour car ride yesterday, and he starting saying the most hurtful things to me. Like I said, I anticipated this.. but now the pain I'm feeling is more so than I imagined :/ he said:\n- you learned nothing from the lessons I taught you as a child.\n- you don't know right from wrong.\n- you're being incredibly selfish (mom wants to help me decorate, but won't because she morally opposes the move).\n- he's just going to take advantage of you.\n- any man who is good enough for you will protect your reputation.\n- think of your grandparents.\n- you made a promise and now you're breaking it (he claims I promised that I wouldn't get engaged or married until I graduated, and he considers this the same thing. I don't remember that conversation in the least bit..\n\nAnyway Reddit.. I just want an outside view of his comments. I'm very hurt and depressed that he's taken it so hard and is trying to give me a guilt trip. What do you guys think?", "summary": "told conservative parents I'm moving out with boyfriend, and dad is trying to guilt trip me. Am I in the wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_1k8vir", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [17M] with a girl [17F] (1.5 Months) that isn't verbally expressive. I like her and want to overcome this.", "post": "I find that in my relationship with this girl, conversation doesn't flow too well and there are often gaps and long silences. This is fine for both of us as we enjoy each others company.\n\nHowever, since we haven't seen each other much over the summer we have resorted to texting, and I've been getting a lot of short, if not, one worded responses. I know this is a sign of disinterest but I'm fairly certain that she likes me and doesn't want to get rid of me, because by now -- she would have. I often get tired of trying to think up an engaging response to short and to the point texts, and give up most of the time. Probably not the best thing to do but otherwise the conversation drags and becomes forced.\n\nThis can sometimes lead to making me feel like she isn't interested in me since I feel I'm neglected from attention, although occasionally there are times when she shows emotions in a very subtle way -- reassuring me she likes me.\n\nI believe this is to do with her past relationship issues, as I know she has been hurt by other guys and even cheated on. I understand that it takes time for someone to warm up to you, but for the majority of the time we have been together I feel like I'm just another guy to her. Her feelings being reciprocated back is very important for me in any relationship as I take them seriously and stride to work things out.\n\nHence the reason I came here to seek words of wisdom and advice. What is the best possible course of action when dealing with someone who isn't as expressive as you, or someone who is afraid to show feelings?\n\nAny help would be of assistance to me, and thanks for taking the time to read this.", "summary": "With a girl that has been hurt before and is less expressive towards me. How can I resolve this issue, and help her show her feelings?"}
{"id": "t3_r55zj", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Reddit, if I can get enough votes I can win a trip to space, and, because of where I live there is very little competition. Can you help me out by clicking vote?", "post": "A newspaper (Metro News) is having a contest and effectively whoever gets the most votes can win a chance at a sub-orbital flight into space. Judges will be polling the applications with the most votes, so you really can help me win a trip to space! Because of what region I'm applying in, there is very little competition.\n\nMy entire life I've been working towards a career in space science. I spent years working at one of Canada's only dedicated Space Science and Human Space Flight museums teaching about the wonders of the cosmos. I do research in astrophysics now: I work on the VERITAS experiment, a gamma-ray observatory near Tucson, Arizona. I am participating in Mars simulations (I am the Chief Engineer for the Mars Desert Research Station's Crew 116) and in my free time I like reading and learning about the history of human space flight. My passion for this field allows me to do public outreach with the Astrophysics group at McGill University. I love being able to share my passion with others and get them interested and motivated in such a fantastic field. Being able to go on this adventure would be achieving a life goal.\n\nThe current post with the most votes has ~25,000 votes. This is nothing compared to some of the other regions (which have 60,000+). So, really, support from even a small part of Reddit can really help me out. I'm in second place with just under 2800 votes.\n\nAll you need to do is go to  and click 'voter' (French for 'vote'). **No signup, nothing. Just vote.** Use your phone, your laptop, your tablet, anything!\n\nAnything you do will *really* increase my chances of going on this adventure. The contest runs until the end of the month. It's one vote per computer, per day.\n\nThis would be a life accomplishment for me. Reddit, please help me! (If anything, please upvote this so that it gets more visibility! This is a self post so karma wouldn't be an issue).\n\nIf selected, I promise to do an AMA.", "summary": "If you go to  and click 'voter' (French for vote), you can help send me to space."}
{"id": "t3_3zowgv", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "tifu by driving in the rain for the first time", "post": "It rained!!! (Guess where I'm from) I got my drivers permit about 2 months ago, bought a car two weeks later with my hard earned money from the summer. The car was shitty to others but a full blown race car to me. Looked like crap but ran like a champ. Anyways, I have never driven in the rain so I knew I'll run into trouble on my way back home from work. Hydro planing sounded familiar to me but never knew it's real consequences. Coming up to my turn where for a good mile (in Dominic torretto voice) I'm free. On the turn there was a huge size puddle of water. I tried to avoid it completly but knew and figured that the front right tire will hit the water. Remember that word \"hydroplane\", yeah I fucked up. The left front tire went over then sunk, causing me the turn into the side of the road. Closer to the edge, the water is deeper. My engine choked, I'm really fucked. Knew trying to keep turning the key will only make things worst. I got out, in ankle deep water, had the bitch in neutral and pushed to the corner of the turn. On the bright side of this whole predicament, a trucker got out of his rig and helped me push the water logged car to the edge. Once out of the water, I tried to give life to my racecar. Once she turned back on I booked it home. Ran the same as before except for a knocking noise. The noise just hurts thinking about it. From the advice from other gearheads, it can't be easy to fix or safe to use without causing more damage. Already made a craigslist ad to at least get some money for another one. F you \"EL NINO\"", "summary": "Drove into a puddle of water, went sideways and engine tried to swim. And a trucker that I hope keeps on Truckin'"}
{"id": "t3_2qhvzz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Yo I [17m] seriously need help with girls and relationships", "post": "I need help so let me start from the beginning of my problems my grandpa died, I was so sad I needed someone to talk to so I rushed into a relationship with a crazy women who would beg me to give her a baby and I'm like 17 so Wtf is wrong with you. I was drunk one night and she almost convinced me thank God for my friends. So I broke up with her and I met this girl through one of my lady friends and omg this girl was amazing, but I rushed into it too and we did things and within 6 days we broke up. Which is good because my best friend use to date her.\n\n  So I'm really sad though and I was just talking and meeting people and eventually this girl walked over to me and said hey I love your smile it's adorable... Here I am think Jesus she's 6 footish and really hot, I'm really short so I was confused, but my wing was like yo wanna get something to eat with us. She said yes and while we were eating we talked for 3 hours and I found out she's model, but as great as that is I really liked her personality and I fell in love and she moved for a job so we broke up.\n\n I was crushed and ever since then I've had to get drink to even kiss a girl who's not her, but the weird thing is I'm over the model. I just can't find anyone I mean I use to have game now I can barely talk to a girl let alone get her to like me. Plus I already know I should just be myself but lately that seems harder and harder to do. I find myself a victim to my desire of wanting to be myself again. But even then I feel like I'm always going to be like this, this man who everyone says hi to and girls think is cute, but never can actually get a girl and actually have a meaningful relationship instead of this let's have sex and say we're dating bull shit I usually get.", "summary": "I don't know what to do or how to fix this problem of 1. Not being myself 2.  Not having meaningful relationships and 3. Being to scared to tell a girl she's beautiful"}
{"id": "t3_2vix7i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26m] have been with my fiance[24f] for a couple years now and I need some serious help!", "post": "So my fiance is donating her eggs and is really fertile from all the hormone shots and me being a guy get really horny still. So she said it was fine if I look at porn and take caren of my own business.  Porn does not do much for me and seemed out a different method and landed on tinder to just flip through the pictures and send a few messages but never planned on meeting up with the girls just the few messages and be done with it. I guess its a self conscious kinda thing and it makes me feel good being seen as attractive to someone.  She found out and got mad and wanted time alone to think about things.  She goes out and doesn't return till 1:30am and stays up on her phone for a little before going to sleep. Me being the nosey idiot looks at her phone and sees she saw another guy.  What do I do?!? I love her more than anything is the world and dont want to lose her.", "summary": "Coukdnt have sex so I watched porn and crossed the line with talking to real people.  She got mad and went out with another guy. She says she still loves me."}
{"id": "t3_30vrui", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by gossiping in public and possibly breaking people up", "post": "Okay. So this happened yesterday, as TIFU's rarely happen onthe day.\n\nIt was late at night and I was waiting for my train home at one of the inner city train stations. My pervious train had been cancelled, and if it hadn't been, this would not have happened.\n\nI was talking to a friend on the phone, both my headphones in so my voice was probably rather loud. We'll call this friend... Larry.\n\nI was telling Larry about Monster Hunter 4, and How myself and other friends name all the monsters after another friend, Jimmy's sexual encounters due to the new mounting mechanic.\n\nAnyway, you should know that Jimmy and Iare really close and we rarely hide stuff from each other. Jimmy told me about another guy, Richy, who is a complete scumbag that has been cheating on his girlfriend for over a year now and she doesn't know. \n\nSo back to Larry. I don't know how we got to the topic of Richy, but I was telling Larry all about how Richard is scum and cheating on his girlfriend, Katie, and she doesn't know. \n\nThis is where the fuck up happened.  \nLarry searches their facebook profiles.\n\n\"Oh Knight. They went to the concert tonight, talk about lucky\" \n\nAt this point I realize I've been shit talking someone in public and I turn around.\n\nRICHY AND KATIE ARE SITTING ABOUT 10 CENTIMETRES BEHIND ME AND HEARD EVERYTHING I SAID.\n\nKATIE IS CRYING, RICHY IS GIVING ME DIRTY LOOKS.\n\nI get up and walk to the other end of the platform hoping to avoid an awkward situation. \n\nI call Jimmy to tell him what happened. He pisses himself and tells me that most of the repercussions are going to fall on him and he's going to get shit on.", "summary": "I was gossiping about people cheating on others and the people in question were sitting behind me and heard everything . Started a huge fight between a couple"}
{"id": "t3_3y9o7w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with my BF [30M] aren't moving forward, but if we do I'm afraid it is because everyone else is getting engaged.", "post": "I have always cringed at my girlfriends who awkwardly pressured their boyfriends into proposing. I never wanted that - I wanted someone who was excited enough about being with me to take a chance and pop the question. However, I am afraid I have given mixed signals. I wanted my BF to think for himself, so I put zero pressure on him. \n\nI never wanted to live with a BF unless we were engaged, but the expense of living in our area was insane, so it was either live together or have 3 roommates each (that we have to clean up after). When we moved in together I made it clear that with that situation I would like to see progress in a year. We are now at almost two years. \n\nI wanted him to *want* to propose to me. I think that is something romantic that comes from a shorter courtship - it can mean that a person \"knows\". However, we have been together for three years and nothing - except almost all of our friends are engaged or married now. I am afraid if he actually asks me it will be because of outside pressure, which is exactly the opposite of what i wanted.\n\nI sound like a brat, but I don't think it should have taken this long. At this point maybe I shouldn't be with him if he hasn't been sure enough to ask me for three years (two of those with shared home and finances with no issues).", "summary": "BF and I together for three years and have lived together for two. Afraid if he proposes now it is just because everyone else is and not because he likes me."}
{"id": "t3_2vii6t", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "fellow redditors would you seek out a lost relative?", "post": "My aunt recently passed away from cancer and was an amazing mother. She (and my uncle) sacrificed everything for her three boys. My mother and her were always close and I view her as a second mom and consider my cousins brothers.\n\nAbout a week before she passed she told her youngest two boy (the oldest lives out of state working on his fellowship) something that she has kept from them their whole lives. When she was a young teenager she got pregnant and gave up her child (my grandmother was a single mom raising 6 kids in a small trailer) in hopes of it having a better life.\n\nIn retrospect it explains a lot about my aunt... She made the boys promise not to search for their sibling and I would never pressure my cousin to go against her last request but one of them told that he was completely fine if I wanted to.\nI'm torn and I really wouldn't know where to start (I know the yr of birth, hospital and her maiden name) and I would never reach out to the person if I found them (I would leave that up to my family) but it would be amazing to see a picture of them on social media and see a little piece of my aunt.", "summary": "My dying aunt reveled to her children that a young age got preggos and gave the kid up, asked them to to search for them but didn't ask me not to. Cousin is fine with me looking. "}
{"id": "t3_3p9qgp", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by Killing a bunch of guys in the Two Towers.", "post": "So this didn't happen today but thought it was about time to share on this sub and I got bored at work so here we go.\n\nSo back in either 3rd or 4th grade I had got a present from my mom who was a fanatic of the Lord of The Rings series and knew I was getting into it as well and that I liked video games. So she bought the LOTR two towers game for Xbox and we played it all day and it was great. The FU happened the next day when I was in class and talking about my time in the two towers and how I was unstoppable, saying things like \"I killed hundreds of bad guys\" and got the secret level that allowed me to climb one of the towers killing people as I went on fought on the top. Well unfortunately one of my classmates had overheard the conversation and started crying and then went to the teacher. Then I got sent down to the office and had to wait for my mom to have a chat with the principle. Apparently the student thought I was talking about the September 11th attacks and that I was crazy saying that I killed a bunch of people. When I explained to the principle what the Two Towers was a game about the Lord of The Rings movie that I had played a lot with my mom yesterday.He seemed confused but my mom was much better explaining then a 10 year old but apparently the student who I offended had been affected by the September 11th attacks in some way. I apologized to the student and explained my FU but I never really got back onto talking terms ever with them and it was kind of weird in class for me for the next week or so.", "summary": "Played the LOTR Two Towers game and was mistakenly overheard that I assaulted the twin towers in September 11th and killed a bunch of people."}
{"id": "t3_20b0j7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23/F] and my bf [23/M] of almost a year broke up tonight. I thought this was it guys. Please help me.", "post": "Tonight my bf comes home in the middle of his rehearsal crying telling me his heart isn't in it anymore. I'm completely blindsided by the whole thing and he offered no explanation. He just kept telling me how much he cared and how much he hated hurting me and that he was \"so sorry\". He kept telling me that I did nothing to warrant it and that I'm one of the most genuine and caring people he's ever met. I can't even begin to understand why. \n\nI honestly hate being this \"please take me back\" and heartbroken over it because I just feel so pathetic. But that's how I honestly feel. I really thought this was it. I have never felt so attached to someone. Never loved someone this much. I've never even imagined a future with anyone realistically until him, and I've dated people much longer than this. \n\nI just want him back so bad you guys. I honestly never felt so myself and connected with anyone. I literally cannot imagine my life without him. We never had a disagreement. Ever. We held the same stance on everything. He was perfect for me and everyone else told me. Even now no one will trash talk him because there's nothing to trash talk. I just feel like I lost the one. \n\nA big thing is that I also work with him. Same department. Yeah, yeah. Don't date where you work. I can avoid him. But still. [EDIT] He's probably leaving our work sometime mid June. It was planned months ago.\n\nHow do I even begin to pick up all of these pieces?", "summary": "I really thought this was my \"one\". Now he's claiming he doesn't love me anymore and that I did nothing to warrant his feelings. I have no closure. How can I begin to try and recover?"}
{"id": "t3_33z3iq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going to hard in a moshpit.", "post": "So it's Rockville weekend here in JacksonVille, Florida and me and some friends(more accurately my brothers friends) travelled all the way from Pennsylvania to see our favorite bands. Took lots of pictures, wonderful weather, sights, and having a blast. So now here's where my fuck up begins. It was 90\u00b0 Fahrenheit today. We were at hatebreed's set getting the hell down to it. Now I'm a 6\"1in 160lb male. 20yrs old. I consider myself what some know as skinny fat. And ya see I'm one of those guys who displaces fat in not so masculine areas...aka my lower body/man booty. So after we do our best to tear it up in a hatebreed moshpit, we sit down to rest and to my shame and horror I have a huge sweat puddle on the ass of my shorts. I panick and realize I NEED to fix this so I tell my big bro I don't feel good and am going to the porta potty. I half run there praying no-one looks at my sweaty, fat rear. Cue me in the hot stall desperately trying to soak the sweat in cardboard toilet paper for like 15 minutes, my confidence all the while quickly sinking. I've given up and realize I should just take my retarded, fat, sweaty ass back to the hotel where my \"friends\" will probably have more fun without me. It was a mistake me even coming.", "summary": "It was unsurprisingly hot in Florida and my skinny fat man ass got soaked in sweat during a hatebreed concert So I left and now I want to die."}
{"id": "t3_125qq0", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Accidentally stepped on one of two cats, and now they won't stop fighting. Help!", "post": "We've had one Sphynx cat for about 4 months now, and noticed he seemed to get lonely alone, so a week and a half ago we got a second Sphynx cat (about 20% larger, and a year older).  They were fine, socializing since the day we got them, with a decent amount of play fighting that would occasionally get a bit rough, which we would break up.\n\nEarlier today, I was in the kitchen feeding them and as they swirled around my feet, I accidentally stepped on the smaller cat (which we've had longer).  He let out a squeal, and the two cats started going at it.  We separated them into different rooms, and tried to \"re-integrate\" them after about an hour, and they were both still hostile.  We tried again after about 2 more hours, and the same thing happened again.  This time we isolated the newer cat in the bedroom and gave our first cat run of the apartment.  They stood at other sides of the same door and meowed (loudly, and sounding angrily) back and forth, which got progressively louder until we took one cat away.\n\nIs there something we should be doing to remedy this?  I don't want to let them both out in the apartment overnight in case they get into it when we're too groggy to effectively stop them.  Any advice is helpful!", "summary": "Stepped on a cat, now my two cats won't stop fighting.  We've had to isolate them, and don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_d7kzn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is there any good icebreakers/subtle flirts when a girl gets nervous around you?", "post": "I have ran into this a few times this summer with cashiers and whatnot.  I am very laid back and calm so I can only assume that the nervousness is not because of my demeanor, but rather they find me attractive? Call it narcissistic to think this, but I have lost a good amount of weight, bought new clothes, tanned from working outside recently, and have never experienced such interactions before. I have come across some females who become flustered when I start interacting with them and all it does is make me nervous lol.  It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't only on occasions where I have limited time to talk to them otherwise I would be able to break the ice, but for a short interaction such as a cashier is there any good ways to quickly break the ice and get a date or such?  I kind of feel awkward just asking \"would you like to go out some time?\", but then again my old fat self wasn't granted these opportunities so maybe that is what I should do?", "summary": "Lost weight, got tan from work, got clothes that fit, girls now seem nervous in a good way, want a good icebreaker."}
{"id": "t3_2yzxbn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [32 M] gf_ [00 M/F] 3 years, am I overreacting to my gf snap chatting a guy that likes her?", "post": "So my GF and I have been dating for just about 3 years now and we talk about how we are pretty much married. We have lived together for 2 of those years and we talk about how we want to marry each other.\n\nI have an issue with something that is bothering me. My GF got hit on by this guy about a year ago. He is friends with a lot of our friends. He made it pretty damn clear that he liked my GF. He asks my GF in front of me that they should do lunch. They never did but they did coffee later. Once I found out they did coffee I got really upset because my GF was the one that asked him for coffee. She claims she just wants to be his friend and that she doesn't want to do coffee with him again because it felt awkward because she kept talking about me at coffee and it was clear to him that we are very serious.\n\nNow fast forward to today. My GF has become snapshat friends with him. She watches his snapshat stories and she texts him through snapchat once and a while. She does this in front of me but it's only been a couple of times so far.\n\nI confronted her today about how I didn't like her texting a guy that likes her. She got upset and claims they are just friends because he hangs around with some of our friends. I said well I guess we will see how you feel when I am texting a girl that you know likes me. I'll put you in my shoes. She got pretty upset at that and I just laid off the subject.\n\nAnyways is this a non mormon thing? Is it my mormon upbringing thats making me think that this isn't appropriate? What do you guys think?", "summary": "gf has been snap chatting this guy that likes her. She refuses to stop doing it. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3a46w6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (28/f) want to be friends with someone (30ish/m) at work", "post": "So there's a guy at my work that I've talked to occasionally. He seems really cool and he just moved here from another state.\n\nI've had a hard time making friends with other people at work since most in my department are a lot older and have kids and families.\n\nI'm also considering a move to another department eventually and I'd like to have some allies at work for when that happens. How to I make friends with him without it seeming like in interested in more than that?", "summary": "trying to make friends with specific people at work, not sure how to approach it without seeming creepy. Guy also has a girlfriend."}
{"id": "t3_g1dwz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I get our neighbors to stop *making* their dogs poop in our yard.", "post": "First post :)\n\nI am in college and live in a house literally bordering university property. Next door to us is a stand-alone apartment building with about 8 units inside (unaffiliated with the school).  \n\nRecently, a middle-aged (white trash) couple moved in with their 3 dogs.  Their apartment building has a small yard about the size of ours, however they always walk their dog over to our yard for them to poop, and then they leave it there.  Most of the time I see it through the window, and just as I get up enough courage to go confront them, they're gone.  Today, I came home while they were in the yard, gave her a \u0ca0_\u0ca0 and asked her politely \"if you're going to let them go here, please at least pick it up\" to which she said \"okay\" and yanked them all on their leashes back to their building.\n\n3 hours later, they're back at it, and not picking it up.  What can I do?  I thought about some sort of pet repellant, but I figured that I don't want to hurt the dogs or make their owners even more abusive to them for not pooping, but they seem to not care that it's property.", "summary": "Neighbors are having their dogs poop in our yard and not clean it up, how do I get back at them?"}
{"id": "t3_1pizul", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [22/M] am unsure how to resolve my insecurities with my girlfriend [22/F].", "post": "A little back story about me, I'm in the Army, have deployed to Afghanistan. So, I'm pretty mature for my age, I've seen a lot and been through quite a bit. I've had only a handful of girlfriends, all which ended pretty violently (verbally). All of them being unfaithful, which is where I'm sure my insecurities stem from. Anywho, onto my girlfriend, we've been together for about a year. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me, she's sweet, caring, knows what to say when to say it, doesn't matter what time of day. The sex is great, we don't violently argue like any of the other girls. She helped me kick my ptsd to the curb, I still have some relapse nightmares. But over all she's amazing, hands down the best girl I've ever been with. However I'm having insecurities with her talking to other guys,I don't bring it up, I don't feel like she should have to deal with something that I'm having an issue with. I would help her through the same thing if the roles were switched but I'd like to try and figure this out by myself first before talking to her about it. She'll bring up that she talked to so and so, and instantly I'll jump to conclusions no matter who it is. One of her crossfit coaches hooked her up with a job interview and I got jealous. No idea why. She's a bit of a social butterfly, always happy, always helping others making them laugh and smile. Which attracts everyone, she sends out a good vibe. She's never done anything wrong, has never shown a sign of being unfaithful. So I'm not really sure why I'm having these feelings. How do you suppose I fix this insecurity of mine?", "summary": "Amazing girlfriend, I get jealous when she mentions talking to other guys. She's never shown any signs of unfaithfulness. We're perfectly happy, except for my personal insecurity."}
{"id": "t3_1lyeh7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[20M] with my Girlfriend [18M/F] of 1 Month are having issues and I need help dealing with her past.", "post": "My past is relatively normal and I don't have alot of intense drama(other than losing 8 of my friends in 1 year but that's a story for another time). \n\nMy SO was born when her mother was 16, her dad was physically abusive and bother were intensive druggies. Her raising was aided by her grandparents that look down on her and see her as nothing more than a burden. She just started her first year at college and doesn't have any friends other than her ex who was her best friend before they started dating(They dated for 2 1/2 months). He has told me that he 100% plans to win her back from me. Oh here's the kicker, I'm going to school 100 miles away, her ex is not and she sees no problem hanging out with him, having him spend the night in her dorm...share her toothbrush. I trust her and I actually don't see anything happening but there's that pressure in the back of my head that's driving me insane. \n\nTomorrow is her Birthday and right now, shes at a party with her mom, aunt, and her ex.(she actually doesn't have any friends). She has serious self-worth issues and I don't want to tear her only friend away from her...but he drives me insane because he's kind of an asshole.\n\nThis might just be my way of venting so I don't blow up at her and drive her away because I actually really care for her and she takes drama very personal and blames herself. Oh and there are probably things that I'm just not remembering", "summary": "Girlfriend has self-worth issues that I don't completely understand and she feels completely alone so she hangs out with her ex bf(for almost 3months)/best friend(for about 2 years)"}
{"id": "t3_4cnqgh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my SO [17 F] of 6 months, can't decide if I should go to college or stay a year with her.", "post": "Me and my SO have been dating for about six months, but have known each other for a long time. Everything's going perfectly, have never met a better girl and could not be any happier. We plan on moving in together next year when she turns 18 because I'll be moving out and she's a junior in high school (dual enrolled at the community college), plus her parents aren't going to support her after high school anyways. (her parents are super strict and don't let her do much of anything. i.e. go on dates alone or have sleepovers).\n\nHowever, I recently got accepted into my number one choice for a university that is 8 hours away and I'm not sure if I should go and move away or stay back. There's definite pros of sticking around, such as not having to spend as much money to get my AA and being able to stay with my SO, but I don't want to regret my decision in the future. Is the college experience worth moving away and not saving money and being with my SO? On the other hand, will I regret going away and not saving money and being with my SO???", "summary": "Dating girl and everything's going perfect. Should I go to college and leave her, or stay here and live with her next year and save money?"}
{"id": "t3_48crwj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my ex [21 F] 3 years. Exotic trip planned by my parents. She purchased her own flight and still hasn't cancelled.", "post": "So my ex finished our relationship 2 months ago, we were together for three years.   \n\nSo the \"issue\" is as follows:   \n\nMy family plans a large exotic, expensive trip every summer and this year my family wanted her to join. (Paid by my family) She and I were excited to finally experience it together.  Fast forward a few months and she broke up with me.  The trip is still happening but she is not coming; my parents cancelled her room, obviously. \n\n   I happened to be looking at out flight info today. She bought her flight on her own and it seem she has not cancelled her flight.   Should I say something to her? or just let her deal with financial hit of not doing anything?", "summary": "Ex bought flight ticket for my family's trip on her own. She hasn't cancelled it for the trip in June. We broke up 2 months ago, should I say something to her?"}
{"id": "t3_2idgyk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (23m) having a hard time moving on from my 3 year relationship, been broken up with her (24f) for 2 months.", "post": "I'll try to keep this as short as possible. I had been dating my ex for 3 years. We had a very good relationship but in the end it came down to a difference in religion. I am agnostic she is Christian. \n\nWhen she broke up with me she said that even though she wanted to marry me and have kids with me that we couldn't because of our different beliefs. But she also said she is still completely on love with me. \n\nSince then we have had some contact still, I've done some begging and trying to convince her to change her mind but that obviously doesn't work. I went NC for about 17 days until I asked her to meet me for a drink. \n\nWe went out and had a lot of fun, basically pretended we were still dating. Holding hands, kissing, we ended up having sex and she said that she is still in love with me but we need to be apart for awhile. She kept saying we have a chance at being together again. Just now now. \n\nThen I went NC again for another 14 days until this weekend when I broke it again. The conversation was pretty much the same, that she is still in love with me but is enjoying being alone, and reconnecting with her old friends. And that she needs more time. \n\nI'm doing everything I can to let go and move on but it's so difficult to do when I know that we are both in love with each other. I'm trying to give her the space she is asking for but my mind is so overcome with emotion that I can't go too long without contacting her. \n\nI guess I just don't know what to do. Do I need to completely move on and forget about her? I obviously want to be with her still so I don't know how what to do when she tells me all of these things about us being together again after we \"find ourselves\"", "summary": "girlfriend broke up with me because of religious differences but continues to tell me she is still in love with me and sees us having a chance together. What do I do moving forward?"}
{"id": "t3_1ai6x7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend(20) of one year wants to take a break from me m (22). What should I do in the meantime?", "post": "Let me begin by saying I would absolutely marry this girl. I know that life happens and nothing is written in stone, and we've got a lot to work through before we get to that point. But I still feel that we work incredibly well together. Now for some backstory: for the last few weeks she's been getting more and more depressed. We go to the same school for theatre and are in all the same classes so I know exactly what she's going through. Its a lot of emotionally taxing and time consuming work and I think she feels like she doesn't have any independance or time to herself. This last week was our one year anniversary, and since then she has cried every day because we have been fighting. I think that taking a break is a good idea. But my biggest fear is that she'll realize that she is happier without me. I know she loves me so much, and she has also expressed interest in marrying me one day. Here's the kicker in all of this: like I mentioned before, we have almost all of our classes together, every day. How can I give her space, and how should I act? How should I cope for myself?", "summary": "Depressed girlfriend(20) wants to take a few weeks off the relationship, but I'm m(22) going to see her every day and we will probably have to work with each other. How should I cope?"}
{"id": "t3_pp2v1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My Mom is suddenly desperate for us to spare my judgey, homophobic grandparents from any emotional discomfort. Why does this make me so mad?", "post": "For my entire life my maternal grandparents have been openly disappointed in everything their offspring, son-in-law and grandchildren have done. To boil our situation down to a few basic examples: My Mom married a blue-collar worker (my grandfather treats my Dad like he is a moron because he fixes cars for a living), my uncle is gay, I have lots of tattoos am an opinionated liberal and make my money working in retail while my brother quit college to make money hand over fist tending bar for a living. (We are all very happy with our choices BTW.)\n\nOver the years they have said countless cruel things such as telling my uncle that it would have been better if he had just kept his being gay to himself. However, as of late I've been having these huge arguments with my mother because she suddenly wants us all to stop sharing with them any details of our lives that they might find upsetting. (Her thought process being that they are getting older and our sharing said information would just cause them un-necessary discomfort.) SUDDENLY I HAVE TO WALK ON EGG SHELLS TO PROTECT THEIR DELICATE FEELINGS?!? \n\nReddit, am I wrong to be so pissed with her or should I just play along.?", "summary": "My hater grandparents are getting old; my Mom is now demanding that we be respectful of their age and not upset them."}
{"id": "t3_2qp253", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting my two front teeth for Christmas.", "post": "Okay so I didn't really get both my front teeth but I couldn't pass up the title and as most TIFU post begin, mine too starts with a little backstory. I'll try to be quick.\n\nSo in the 6th grade I was on my way to school on my bike just as I would do any other day. Suddenly, and I shit you not, some jackass I had never met decided to kick me off of my bike. I wasn't expecting this and so when he kicked the peg of my bike I swerved too hard and as my front tire went perpendicular I flew off the bike, and onto the pavement, teeth first. Luckily my teeth only had some cracks in them and they really weren't noticeable. My lip on the other hand was split wide open but that part isn't important to the post.\n\nSo here I am about a week ago at my friends house having a few beers and taking shots while playing a Mario kart drinking game when some more people show up so we're gonna go to Gamestop to get more controllers. (Sober driver drove, obviously) While walking out of his room my friend looks up and blows on the plastic piece of those pull strings that you use to let down the foldable attic stairs, you know what I mean. (I added a photo of the one in my house but it doesn't have the plastic piece) In any case it shoots up the string and makes it quite high and so I, in my infinite tipsy wisdom decided to beat his \"record\". Now I'm shorter than my friend by a few inches and I know there's no way I'll beat his \"record\" if my breath dissipates before it reaches the plastic handle thing. Naturally this prompts me to jump a bit off the ground so as to compensate for the height difference. I hop, I push with my breath, I only get the plastic piece a few inches up the string. This is followed by me closing my mouth on the way down from the hop and the plastic piece hooking on the back of my tooth and shattering it. The next day I went to the dentist and had my tooth bonded. My mother said it was a Christmas gift.", "summary": "TIFU by getting tipsy, \"competing\" with my friend, shattering part of my tooth, and getting it for Christmas."}
{"id": "t3_218bt6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my girlfriend [26 F] 1.5y, I cheated, she found out, we're stuck in a loop.", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nMe (21M) and my girlfriend (26F) have been together for about a year and a half.\n\nI kissed another girl about 2 months ago, she found out about a month and a half ago and we've been on a break ever since.\n\nShe's trying to get over it, but seems unable to. Every time we set up a time to see each other, she bails out at the last minute.\n\nI understand she needs time and space - she told me that, I tried giving her space and time, but everytime she starts talking to me again, I am so happy to talk to her that I end up being intense and a little too dependant.\n\nI keep fucking up. I am unable to go slow. I feel as though she isn't trying, she's walking away. \nI don't want to lose her - I love her so very much.\nI won't leave her - and she says she won't leave me either, that she's unable to. She doesn't know why.\n\nWe're in a weird state, where we both want, but I keep screwing up and she can't show me she wants to.\nShe says she needs time to work on herself, but I have a lot of trouble giving her the time she needs.\nI feel played, I feel toyed, I don't know what to do.\nI want to help, but she doesn't want my help.\nIt's affecting my job, it's affecting my mind. I have panic attacks at night.\n\nI guess I don't really have a question, just needed to vent it out a little.\n\nThanks for reading, reddit.", "summary": "Kissed another girl. Girlfriend found out. On a break since. We both want to stay together, but she needs time and space, which I am having a hard time giving her."}
{"id": "t3_kvoaq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My friend of two years just recently started ignoring me. Am I being paranoid?", "post": "I don't get this at all.\nWe've been friends for two years. Simply put by being his friend I was in the cool crowd without having to be a total doucheface or anything. But that wasn't the reason I was his friend, it was cause we both played minecraft and toribash and both knew what a trollface was and shit, and we just tried to make eachother laugh. Lately though I've felt like he's ignoring me. We got put in seperate homerooms but we still see eachother in half the rotations. In math we were goofing around across the room with the whiteboards and markers that were supplied. We laughed a bit. And typically after school we'll talk on skype and play shit, and pause when we want to watch youtube or do something else. For the past few days we haven't been using skype. And just today when he was bringing a mutual friend over to his house, he decided to take another path, even though I could've walked with him as our houses are on the same path.\nSorry if I'm sounding like a girl with all the complaining. I just want to be friends again.", "summary": "best friendz omgomgomg yayaya talk on skype after school, lately been not friends. not sure if paranoid or he hates me or what."}
{"id": "t3_370a7x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 25F with my 37M coworker 1+ year; He has been infatuated with me for the past year and I'm thinking about giving him a shot. However, there's some issues including race and him being separated.", "post": "I have been working with Steve* for a little over a year. He has always been obviously fond of me and has brought me coffee/breakfast etc. in the past. He asked me for my number about 7-8 months ago and I kind of blew him off.\n\nHere lately he has been trying again to get me to talk to him, so I caved and gave him my number. Turns out, we actually have a lot in common and we have been having great conversation the past few days. He is being pretty obvious about the fact that he really likes me and is looking for something serious.\n\nHowever.... he is still technically married. He is separated to be exact. And he's a coworker. He's a manager in his department and I'm an assistant manager in a different department. Our company doesn't necessarily frown on interoffice relationships though and he's not in a position of authority over me. \n\nI just don't know what to do. I don't know if this is a can of worms I should open, or if I should just go with my gut - I feel like this could be a really good thing.\n\nAnother facet of this is that I'm white and I've never dated a black man (he's black). I have dated outside my race, but just not a black guy. *Please read on, this becomes relevant.* It definitely wasn't due to lack of attraction - it just happened that way. \n\nHe asked me if I had ever dated a black guy before (he's black) and I said that I hadn't. I asked him if he'd ever dated a white girl before and he said he actually prefers white women. Is this a fetish thing? That's another concern I'm having. \n\nWhat do you think, reddit?", "summary": "Coworker has been infatuated with me the past year, I finally gave him my number, now I'm conflicted about if I should pursue anything."}
{"id": "t3_2ij0gv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 M] was introduced to my roommate's [25 M] crush [23 F] and she's more interested in me.", "post": "Had a party two weeks ago. Roommate brings over girl he's been crushing on since summer. I wasn't really hitting on her, but the girl and I connected pretty well. Roommate gets drunk and tells me she's fair game when her and her friends leave.\n\nSince then we've gone on two dates, and he discovered this last weekend. He gets blackout drunk to the point of belligerence, calls me selfish, self-absorbed, and ultimately victimizes himself.\n\nI realize I'm in the wrong for not telling him about the dates, and I plan to apologize for that. But if he was never was in an intimate relationship with her, should I really feel that bad?", "summary": "Roommate introduces me to crush, her and I hit it off, he's now pissed. Did I fuck up?"}
{"id": "t3_1gm3eq", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I 21F cannot tell if the guy 20M I am interested in is actually interested in me.", "post": "Heeeeeres the summary:\n\nWe go to the same university - he is 1 year below me.  At the end of fall semester before I left for study abroad during one of the uni wide parties I drunk FB chat him from my phone and get him to come \"hang out\" in my room at around 2 am.  I was booty calling him since I was leaving, he thought were were hanging out and we just chatted in my room for an hour or so. [Made this meme about it.](\n\nDuring my study abroad we chat on occasion, I think he is quite funny but he is very shy.  I am back in the US now interning in NYC and I find out that he is also interning in NYC.  We have hung out twice in the city, walking around and talking for a a couple hours each time, each of which have ended with a brief hug.  \n\nSo, I really can't tell what is up, its frustrating to me since I could be dating in the city if I wanted to but I'm focusing on this.", "summary": "The guy I'm into is shy, we hang out alone (just the two of us) occasionally, what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2xyhnu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "FWB suddenly lost interest?", "post": "So, I [20 f] had plans to hang out with my fwb [19 m] of about a month last night, which he blew off. When I asked him about it he said we could hang out today instead which I was fine with. He was ignoring me for a while and then just said he didn't want to see me anymore, totally out of the blue, because we \"never had much in common.\" (???) I kind of pressed him a little bit because I was confused and he gave me the whole it's not you thing, saying he just had no desire to hang out anymore but didn't know why. I really don't understand, as I saw him just a few days ago and we had sex and hung out for a long time it seemed fine. When I asked him about that he said he felt similarly then as well, which was pretty upsetting, and made me feel used and just generally pretty shitty. I just don't understand what's going on here and my efforts to talk about it have been ignored. My own insecurities make me feel like it's something I did or maybe he's not attracted to me. Is he being honest with me?", "summary": "fwb says he's suddenly lost interest but doesn't know why; is he being honest and is there anything I can do to salvage this?"}
{"id": "t3_2x4ctn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] asked out a [21 F], can I let you know response", "post": "So recently I have been texting back and forth with a girl I meet over the internet. Things have been going great, we have a lot in common and have been texting almost everyday for over a week. She is a very busy student in her last year of a nursing program and seems to always be very busy but does make time to text me back. \n\nYesterday I got up the courage to ask her out for a coffee this weekend. She told me that she has work placement and couldn't do this weekend. I suggested we do some other time in the next week or two. She responded with \"My schedule is really hectic now, can I let you know?\" I said sure.\n\nNow i'm trying to decide if something like this is worth pursuing further. I feel I might just stop texting her and put the ball in her court. I guess my question is haas anyone here ever had a girl tell them they will let them know and actually get back to them?\n\nAny responses would be greatly appretiated\n\nThanks", "summary": "Asked out a girl I have been texting with for over a week, got an \"can I let you know?\" response. Not sure if worth pursuing further"}
{"id": "t3_4nhgjp", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by thinking it was Thursday", "post": "This actually happened today.\nI'm in my first semester at uni and currently have a part time job. We're in student vacation right now because it's exam period, so I've been really caught up in my study. \nBasically the fuck up is I somehow managed to go a whole day thinking it was Wednesday when it was really Thursday. I spent the day in the uni library, got home late and went to sleep. Yes I know, I'm an idiot. I have work on Fridays and Sundays so I get woken up by a phone call from my manager asking me where I was. Queue confused me, who's still new to this job stuttering my way around a legitimate reason as to why I wasn't at work. I end up spitting out that I could get there in the next hour and she says \"dont come\" and hangs up. \nI'm going to have to see her on Sunday, and I have no idea what I'm going to say (any advice would be nice friends).", "summary": "I thought it was Thursday when it was actually Friday and I didn't go to work. Manager called and was unhappy."}
{"id": "t3_vhg18", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Sudden increase of ants in bathroom, where do they come from and how do I get rid of them?", "post": "Okay, this just happened recently and I should've took a picture but I was freaking out too much and washed all of them off. If you don't believe me, fine, but for those who have any idea about this please answer. \n\nSo I just got back yesterday from a holiday (12 days trip). I took a bath directly after I got back but there were no signs of ants, only a little bit. Anyway, I just got out of the shower but this was what happened: \n\nI was washing my hair when I felt something crawling on my legs. I thought they were just water droplets that were on my legs and were just hanging around then suddenly, I felt the crawling sensation going up not down and found it strange cause the last time I checked, gravity was still in place. So I looked down and I saw 2 ants crawling on me. Wtf? I know right anyway, I didn't find it that strange as there have been a few ants in my bathroom before the trip (like i see 3 a day). Okay after I washed them off I saw 5 ants in front of me and they were all running towards the left and that's when I saw it. **LIKE OVER 200+** (not exaggerating) **ants running away up the wall to a hole** (where their home are I guess.) AND I WAS PANICKING/TERRIFIED IDK I WAS JUST SO SCARED and I know I should've taken a picture but I was so freaked out and I washed all of them off. Jesus! Despite telling my parents, they were all like \"You washed them off didn't you? That's fine then\" and \"You're a guy, act more manly\". BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT REDDIT D; I was so shocked. I never eat in my room or the bathroom so I'm really confused plus scared as I have seen some ants coming into my bedroom. So if you guys have any advice or whatever, please help. I don't feel safe in this place anymore knowing that a shitload of ants are nearby.  \n\nFYI, I live on the 3rd floor of my house.", "summary": "Came back from a holiday to find my bathroom with shitload of ants crawling ~~everywhere~~ in the shower area"}
{"id": "t3_3w0jq3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My boyfriend(18/M) wants to buy me(16/F) a bunch of stuff but I feel bad about that.", "post": "He's my first real official boyfriend. I like him alot. We haven't been able to see each other because of distance and lack of licenses. But almost every time we talk he ask me if I want him to buy me stuff like clothes. On one had yes I want the stuff on the other hand I like him and he's worth more to me than just stuff. I'm not sure if I should just let him buy me stuff or if I should keep rejecting the offers. I feel guilty anytime anyone buys me stuff so he's no different maybe even more. I don't have a job so I can't give back. I wouldn't feel as guilty if I could buy him stuff too. Advice?", "summary": "my boyfriend keeps offering to buy me stuff and I feel guilty accepting the offer so I keep regecting the offer."}
{"id": "t3_xbpst", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm thinking of breaking up with my girlfriend, but I feel utterly lost, and am unsure what I should do.", "post": "I'm a 17 year old male, and she's 16. We've been dating for 4 months, and recently I've been torn on whether or not I should end the relationship. I love her, but I don't think we've ever been able to really connect. On reflection, we don't have a whole lot in common; I don't think I've ever been able to have a meaningful conversation about anything during the whole 4 months we've been dating. To add to this, she's always busy with baby-sitting, and even uses that as an excuse to neither text, call, or instant message me.\n\nWhen she doesn't have to baby-sit, all she wants to do is sit at home and watch television and play video games; I haven't been able to get her to come over since May. While we're on the subject, I've only been able to spend time with her maybe half a dozen times in the past 40 or so days. I did manage to hang out with her at her house today, and quite honestly, I felt good being with her at the time, but nothing has changed. Well, nothing has changed for the better anyway. While I was there, I could not help but feel distant and a little unhappy with the relationship, and left on an emotional low-note.\n\nI feel bad; I don't want to hurt her. I do love her; she's really sweet, and I can tell she's into the relationship, despite her lazy disregard for communication. However, I feel awfully unhappy, and I don't know what to do. I think I only got into a relationship with her because she was available, and we were both horribly lonely (I've never had a significant other before; she's never done well with her past relationships). I really don't know what I'm doing, and I'm not close to my family, and I have no close friends to talk about this with (especially since most of my friends know and like my girlfriend). Everyone I talk to thinks we're perfect for each other, and I feel stressed out and alone in the world. Reddit, I could really use some advice; I have nowhere else to turn, and no one else to talk to.", "summary": "I'm not sure my girlfriend is right for me, but I'm having trouble with the thought of breaking up with her."}
{"id": "t3_1k899m", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Pup snapping at me when i try to take something away.", "post": "this has probably been asked before.\n\nI have two 3 month old pomchi puppies. I'm in the process of teaching them everything, and of course because i have two litter mates it's double the effort.  I'm also teaching them (boys) \"leave it\" and \"drop it\" One gets drop it, the other doesnt.\n\nThe one that doesn't get it got a hold of my Nintendo DS charger and chewed the plug (not the socket part but the part that goes into the DS) off of the wire.  I didn't want him chewing it because the bare wires were showing now and it was still plugged in and i also didn't want him chewing on plastic he could swallow so i gave the command drop it tempted him with some delicious treats but he was content on keeping the charger with him.  \n\nbecause of the exposed wire part i decided to grab it out of his reach (90% of the time he doesnt growl or care)\n\nthis time he did.  he snapped and tried to bit me. got me in the hand but it didn't hurt because hes so small.\n\nafter i got it away i felt around the blanket he was sittin on to see if i missed any pieces and he tried two more times to bite and snap at my hand.\n\nIt was aggression.\n\nWhat do you recommend I do if the drop it or leave it or tempting with treats thing doesn't work (or they haven't learned it yet) \n\nor if hes chewing something dangerous or valuable to me that i accidentally drop and tries to bite me violently... how do i discipline him after this.  \n\nsure i can try to avoid it, but what happens when it DOES happen.\n\nyes i AM n the process of teaching them the commands but i need to know what to do RIGHT after he bites me not how to avoid it .\n\nsorry. long", "summary": "puppy possessive sometimes over things tries to bite me. how to discipline him as i try to teach the drop it or leave it command."}
{"id": "t3_tn18s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "help me reddit! losing the spark...", "post": "So, I'm currently a junior, soon to be senior, in high school. I met a girl that goes to my school on a field trip, and from that very first moment I really started liking her. Time passed and we started talking, which went on for maybe a month or two, texting every night. We went on a few dates, we kissed. I took her to prom and asked her to be my gf that night, and she said yes.\n\nMy problem now is, there seems to be little to no romance between us at all. I recently took her to a movie and we literally made no physical contact. The conversations aren't awkward, because we make small talk, but it's almost so much small talk that we feel like just friends. She used to give obvious signs that she liked me, such as mimicking, laughing, etc, which she doesn't do as much now, just 3 weeks later.", "summary": "My gf and I are starting to feel like friends instead of lovers, and there's no romance. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_11t5ud", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Suggest chocolate substitutes!", "post": "Hi *\n\nI've removed butter, ice cream and almost all bread, cereals and pasta successfully from my diet, while increasing my consumption of vegetables and whole foods. I have not yet found a good substitute for chocolate. I have decent self control and I've tried removing it from my diet, but, when I do this, I continue to crave it (even after not taking it for multiple weeks). I don't want to continue craving it, so do you have any suggestions for addressing this problem? I am more interested in substitutes than in eating less chocolate, because I still get the cravings if I simply eat less of it, so is there some healthy substitute that is compatible with getting thinner that you could recommend?", "summary": "I can remove chocolate from my diet, but I continue to crave it. I want a healthy substitute, compatible with getting thinner."}
{"id": "t3_1l93tm", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Tips and advices about getting into Yale/Columbia?", "post": "Hello everyone!\n\nMy name's Guillaume (don't even try to pronounce it you english-speakers), I'm an 18 french homeschooled student from Lyon, France.\nAnd I'd need some advice about how to get into Ivy League schools.\n\nI have kind of an impetuous background: I was an excellent student, however I dropped school at 15, and then lived for one year in a host family. Now I'm getting back to studies, taking three college-level classes in english (Economics, Maths and PoliSci), studying on my own, practicing billard, looking for a half-time job, doing theatre and soon\u2122 music... Anyway.\n\nEven if my preparation is a total over-kill for a simple high-school diploma, I'd really like to get into Yale or Columbia after I graduate, mostly because of the college life and experience I'm looking for, as well as the high-quality education. However, I only have a vague idea about what is expected to get in - I know that 4.0 GPA and triple 800s at the SAT is pretty kewl to have, also having a nice extracurricular background, but that's pretty much all I know about the admission process right now.\n\nSo, we get to the", "summary": "I'm an 18yo french student with an uncommon background who will graduate from high school at 20, do I have any hope of getting into Yale, and what are some useful tips to make it happen?"}
{"id": "t3_24q6bu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my Girlfriend [20 F] 1.6 years, Is a slob and I don't know how much longer I can take it", "post": "Hi, I have a serious problem and I have no idea how to address the issue without having a war and causing serve drama. My girlfriend is beyond a slob. I myself am clean and neat like an average human being. I'm not super neat but I'm not messy. My girlfriend is beyond a slob and doesnt take care of herself. I and her leased an apartment in December and ever since we moved into together the house is always disgusting. Its sometimes so nasty, I'm embarrassed to be living here. I always clean up the house. She never does. She always says she does but doesnt. I've picked up stuff that is SO NASTY I cannot describe it. I actually almost threw up, and I'm not being funny, thats serious. I had to clean up stuff that was just beyond repairing to my brain. I love my girlfriend, I do.. But I don't think I can live with her anymore if she keeps up like this. I don't know why she thinks its okay to sleep next to filth. Her bathroom is filled with so much stuff. I had to clean up Tampon papers that were left on the floor. I had to empty out her garbage in her bathroom and found a USED Pad.. it was so old the blooded turned to BLACK. It smelled so bad, I can taste it in my mouth.\n\nI have serve allergies that I have to take medication for to keep my nose from not running and sneezing... 70% of the time of that day. There is so much dust from her stuff lying around that it eats at me.\n\nI have no idea how to bring up this issue without hurting her feelings and to actually get results. \n\nI don't mind cleaning, but its every week. And after I'm done cleaning, it only takes a day for it go back to the way it was.\n\nI don't know what to do, sometimes inside I wonder if I just never signed the papers and never left to live with her. \n\nI love this woman but I don't know how much more I can take.", "summary": "My girlfriend is a slob, its so bad that its sometimes effects my health and the stuff that I pick up after her is just terrible. She says she cleans but doesn't. I don't know how to address this."}
{"id": "t3_4c4qxu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my GF [17 F] of 1.5 years who suffers from depression/anxiety. How/should I end it?", "post": "Became really close friends with a mutual friend of many of my friends. We fell in love and have been dating semi-long distance for 1.5 years (75 miles; college). She was diagnosed with anxiety and depression around month 8. \n\nEver since this school year started, she has been cancelling plans left and right. Sometimes it's \"I need to clean up the house before relatives get here next week\", sometimes she just never contacts me/responds until it's 11PM and there's absolutely no way we'd spend time together. She always says she's really upset that we couldn't spend time together and that she misses me and loves me more than she could ever express. I haven't seen her in about a month, and because we're so busy in school we rarely talk for more than 10 minutes every other day. I used to FaceTime her, but it just makes me feel awful when I do. I don't want to leave her because she's perfect for me on paper. Also, I don't want to make her even more depressed because I still care about her very deeply.", "summary": "Depressed girlfriend becoming increasingly distant over past months, not sure what to do. Should I wait the extra month for summer break and see if it's just the distance creating tension, or should I end it now?"}
{"id": "t3_34m32r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (18F) act on a crush on a friend (18M)?", "post": "So first and foremost, I rarely act on crushes. Last time I actually told someone I liked them was with a homemade Valentine's card when I was 8. I usually just suppress my feelings because I convince myself that they will never be reciprocated. I'm not ugly or overweight or anything but I've struggled with social anxiety and self-loathing. I got therapy, not as bad now but still not great, I digress.\n\nI have a crush on one of my male friends. We sit together in some classes and he's lovely to me... but he's nice to most people. Where I'm from at least, teenage courtship revolves around texting. I occasionally shoot him a message about school work and they turn into hour long conversations about everything.\n\nI don't think he's out out of my league or anything but as recently as March he was pining over a mutual friend (also 18F) who is admittedly prettier than me. After she found out (in December) she said she wasn't interested in him romantically. \n\nBasically, what do I do? I am intensely green when it comes to relationships and my social anxiety means I'm terrified of being rejected/being made fun of/him being disgusted if I tell him.", "summary": "I (18F) like a friend (18M) and am scared to tell him. He potentially likes someone else who probably doesn't like him back. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_od65o", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Don't know if this is credit card fraud....help?", "post": "Alright so here is the situation, and it is very strange.\n\nThis girl my roommate works with came over to the house a few weeks ago drunk and hysterical after she broke up with her boyfriend and gave him 180 dollars, her bridge card, and a credit card she said was \"paid for\".  She also gave another friend at the house 200.\n\nShe said she was dying and that she wanted them to spend everything as she wasn't going to need it.\n\nNow after this happened she promptly left and me and my roommate went and filled up my gas tank with the credit card and went to the super market and bought food and stuff for the house.\n\nWe ended up using about 130 dollars on the card and it was maxed out, now my roommate came up to me about a half hour ago and told me money was back on the card and he wants to go to the store and max it out again....the first time I thought wasn't the greatest idea and I told him I didn't really think it was a good idea to use it again.\n\nHe told me it was fine since she gave him permission but that her dad had been calling him and trying to get a hold of him and he hasn't responded. \n\nNow I DEFINITELY do not want to be involved in anything with this credit card.\n\nSo my question is, the card is in the girls name...my roommate is going to stupidly keep maxing it out every month even though I told him it might be credit card fraud...and I think her dad might be footing the bill for everything.  \n\nShe gave him permission....I don't think hes talked to her since, so my question is would you guys see what hes doing as credit card fraud? How dangerous is this?  Should I stop him, or just not get involved?\n\nAlso, am I guilty of anything even though when I was participating in use it was directly after this girl had given us permission?\n\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "Dying girl gave roommate credit card, he wants to use it forever, think her dads footing the bill and pissed.  Is this credit card fraud?"}
{"id": "t3_2tpzj6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Why must I always see the end in the beginning?", "post": "Hey everyone, I have never posted before, but am in deep need of advice because I am scared that all of my relationships will fail if I don't grasp how to manage this issue of mine.\n\nSo, I (25F) really, really love my boyfriend (25M). We have been together for just 6 months. Frankly, I have never been treated so well in my entire life... He is caring, we both look up to each other intellectually, we are both very physically attracted to one another, we genuinely love each other's company, our sex life is amazing and everything else is gold. He tells me that he has never loved someone as much as he loves me and that he sees no end to this relationship. And that should be great! But it's not. Now that I am so deeply in love with this man, I feel nothing but terror at the thought of losing him. When I am not with him, I start dealing with a huge amount of insecurities. In all of my relationships, I have always felt like I love my S/O more than they love me. I have tried to meditate, I have tried to get down to why I feel this way, but I just haven't been able to grasp it yet. \n\nI have this outlook on love: 'If you get too attached to something, it's going to hurt like hell when you lose it.' I don't want to think this way but am not sure how to turn it around. This has always been an issue of mine but it has exploded in my face even more so since my last relationship where I had been cheated on. \n\nWhy does this keep happening to me? \nDoes anyone else deal with this too? The constant and everlasting paranoia that your S/O isn't as invested as you are. \nDoes anyone else feel like they see an end to all amazing relationships? \nHow can I turn it around reddit. Please help. I don't want to fuck this up.", "summary": "I feel terrified by how much I love my boyfriend and I just want to be able to sit and enjoy the ride without withdrawing from this relationship."}
{"id": "t3_3zaeiq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by renting a house with 3 other guys", "post": "This started in september, but the consequences are really being felt now. \nThe rent was charge by the house, so we all had to had to have a level of trust that each of us would pay it. Fast forward a month and a half, one of the roommates, lets called him N, decides he's scared of the area and doesn't like his job. Sends us a facebook message a moves out, paying rent up until november. Sure, no problem, we have a month and a half to find someone for december. \nDecember rolls around, and I'm the only roommate constantly posting on kijiji, talking to friends, facebook, showing the house...etc. I'm doing all the work and no one is grabbing the room. We negotiate with the landlord, and he agrees to use N's last month to pay for december. \nI finally find a guy for January, and he has money for first month. Great! No problem. BUT \nLandlord visits me yesterday, lets me know he needs first and last month from the new guy or we get an eviction notice. New guy doesn't have last month. I've been saving up for a trip to Thailand for month and months and months, so I pull my money from there, because I don't like getting evicted. \n\nNow the landlord and the new guy are pressuring me to pay rent, but I can't pay until tomorrow due to online banking, I've lent my own money out to a complete stranger from a trip thats starting tomorrow, and I have no idea where the money is coming from. This has been a hellish experience.", "summary": "Roommate bails, uncommunicative landlord, lazy roommates and I'm left scrambling to cover rent. "}
{"id": "t3_4586it", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex [20F] is hiding out at mine [21M] because of her flatmates", "post": "Long story so here goes. My ex of a month, I told her when she broke it off because her depression was effecting our relationship that if she needs/requires support I will try to help out.\nThe other day she called asking for help I was hesitant at first but when I found out she had called the ambulance (hospital is next door to me) I thought I'd check on her to make sure she is okay. She is already receiving help and for depression. But obviously sometimes it's a little worse. \nYesterday she ended up in hospital gave us a slight scare when the hospital told us that they had lost her. But as it turned out she was in another section of the hospital. But for what happened yesterday all of her housemates have essentially just given up on and told her she was being unfair on them and that she should just fuck off else where (in one message they actually said that to her)... So I said she can hide out here till the week break that's just a few days away.\n\nI don't know what to do. Obviously we have broken up its recent and I really don't think it's a good idea for her to be hiding out at the same time. I think her so called friends and housemates are being too harsh and unfair on her... :/\nI have images of what's happening available at request. In caught in the middle and I'm being contacted by them as well, almost like they are trying to get a reaction and assess where I am with all this so far I've just ignored them. But honestly I think they are going a bit far. Seeing as they won't stop. I told them yesterday to leave it, because she feels like she is being personally attacked but instead they carried on and tried to laugh it off over Facebook.", "summary": "Ex hiding at mine because I feel her flatmates are making a mockery of her depression and telling her to fuck off etc."}
{"id": "t3_zfhwl", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have an older neighbour who I think is being neglected by her daughter and son-in-law, what would you do to help?", "post": "I don't know if she has dementia, but what I do know for sure is her memory isn't fully there anymore. She lives with her daughter (who looks to be in her 50's) and her son-in-law, and they leave her there all day every day by herself. She takes her walker and goes on about an hour to walk to the end of our street (a 2 minute walk at most) and back, but more often than not she doesn't remember which house is hers, so she comes to ours. More than once we've come home and she's sitting by our front door on her walker, or we'll look out our window and she'll be walking towards our house. Our houses look nothing alike. We've always done our best to help her out, she tried to get into my car thinking it was her daughters car, and we've had to convince her that she didn't have to feed the cattle (we live in a neighbourhood by a school). But today, we found out that she was sitting in a car parked way back in their driveway with all of the windows up and a winter sweater and hat on for a few hours and it was sweltering hot. We had to convince her to go inside, all the while she was telling us she was waiting for her daughter. It's now almost 8pm and no one has been home since early this morning. If we hadn't been there, she would probably still be sitting in the car waiting for them. What is also scary, is that we knew she was there because we heard the dinging of the door, because the keys were in the ignition. What do we do? We're afraid for her safety, what if she tries to make food and turns on the oven and forgets? Our other neighbour tried to tell her daughter once, but she doesn't seem to listen/care.", "summary": "Very old neighbour who barely even remembers where she lives sat in a boiling hot car for hours until we told her to go inside, and no one has been home to see her since early this morning."}
{"id": "t3_4zik27", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my gf [23 F] of about 4 months, she is uncomfortable with me going on vacation with one of my female friends. Not sure how to proceed", "post": "Backstory: I moved to a new city about 6 months ago for a job where i met my friend Jane. During our training we became good friends, have some shared interests etc, but after training finished we haven't seen each other that much because of the type of work that we do (different shifts and etc).\n\nAbout the same time i met my gf, Sophie, who is just the sweetest and who i really care about. We dont share that many friends, she has hers and i have mine.\n\nProblem: Jane and I spoke a lot about how we love going to music festival etc, and how we should get together with the rest of the friends we made during our training and take some time off at the same time. We planned this quite early on (before i was serious with my gf), and we both applied for leave quite early for september (hoping that our friends would hop on once they saw we had booked our days off). They did, but applied later on, and just this week got rejected their application. I knew this could happen when we first planned the trip, but at that time i wasn't that serious with my girlfriend, so I thought going just with Jane would not be a problem.\n\nNow that I am more serious with Sophie though I wanted to talk with her before we booked any tickets, and she just said frankly that it would bother her if i left with only Jane. Now, me and jane can both rearrange our plans and do other things for the days off we have, but we have planned this trip for a long time, and we would both be very disappointed if we didn't go. I don't want friends or girlfriends hinder me for doing things that I really want to do, but at the same time I realise that it would be very selfish for me to got on this trip, and of course I don't want Sophie to be uncomfortable. My thoughts are really clashing here, and I need some outside perspective from you all; should I stay or should I go?", "summary": "My gf if uncomfortable with me going on vacation with a female friend, and I don't know if should go or not."}
{"id": "t3_1q7qs9", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "People everywhere are ignoring me.", "post": "For around a year now I've started realising that more and more people are ignoring me or being un neccesarily harsh. I am in secondary school and am often bullied by a majority of people. Around six months ago I made friends with some people who I play video games with (mostly league of legends).\n\nI used to play with these people daily and talk on Skype a lot, I really appreciated their company. A while ago I asked people if they wanted to go to town and do something, everyone said no, this was extremely strange as they always go. From that point on I have realised that no one has started a conversation with me, infested this out over a school holiday, not messaging anyone, I got messages from one person.\n\nThis one person happens to be a girl that I like at the moment and so a small bit of conversation was welcome. But this didn't last long, for a while now not even she will start a conversation. I've essentially given up on people. I often message said person but replies seem half hearted etc. and I know I don't have a chance anyway. Today I asked why she still bothered talking to me, her words: \"why do I bother talking to you? Because I care, and I care because I do care and I can care if I want to.\"\n\nNow this pushes the line because I'm pretty damn sure that its a lie, looking at conversations and other aspects. \n\nI came here because I'm really not sure what to do next... Do I try to talk to people? Or what? I just needed somewhere to vent really, thanks for any words of advice :)", "summary": "lots of people ignoring and bullying me, found some friends, they started ignoring me, continued talking to one girl who I like, unconvinced by her attempt to tell me that she cares, any advice?, thanks for reading."}
{"id": "t3_43jmck", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My BF (21 M) has borrowed money from me (21 F) and I haven't seen him put much effort to get a second job", "post": "We've been dating for 2 years and I moved in with him two months ago\n\nMy boyfriend has one job where the hours are limited but he makes about $14 an hour. He had a second job but but that was a seasonal job so it ended in early January. At his primary job they shut down during the winter break and he gets his paycheck monthly on the 15th so things have been tight for him for the January paycheck because he only worked about a 1/2-3/4 the hours he normally does.\n\nSince his January paycheck he has borrowed $300 from me and we're still two weeks away from the next paycheck.\n\nI work full time (40 hours weekly) at a minimum wage (8.5 hourly) job that I really like as I'm waiting for certification from passing an occupational test. So I don't have a lot of money to spare. Ideally I'd like to keep my money to build my savings and take another certification test for more job prospects.\n\nMy boyfriend said that he would put the money he borrowed towards my $60 monthly car insurance and $100 rent for the next two months. I'm worried because I see him borrowing more money from me this month. Also it's his turn to buy groceries.\n\nHe applied for a job that would be above minimum wage and similar to his first job. He had an interview but no second interview. I told him to follow up with them, call asking for the next person he was supposed to interview with to set up a time or go in person and try to talk to the interviewer but I haven't seen him put in any effort for follow up\n\nHow can I talk to him to show him that he needs to work more even if it's just a minimum wage job for a month or two to supplement his income?", "summary": "my boyfriend works one well paying job but doesn't get much hours there. I think he needs to pick up a second job for the time being but he doesn't show that much imitative"}
{"id": "t3_2vw360", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [21/M] don't know how to show my love to my girlfriend [28/F] anymore", "post": "For the past few months I have been decreasingly able to show my love and appreciation to my girlfriend. We've been together for two years, and we have lived together for 7 months. Both of us work full-time.\n\nWe have both known that this has been an issue, and today (Valentine's day) would've been the perfect opportunity for me to show her my love and start to make a change... But I didn't get her anything. Not even a card. It's not because I didn't feel like it - I simply didn't think to do so for some reason.\n\nHowever, it's not just today. It's every day. I want to show her how much I love her. How special she is. I just can't figure out *how*. I don't know what to do. Any gestures, big or small, I just can't seem to make it up/think about something.\n\nThis has led to her feeling unwanted by me, which in turn led me to feel unwanted by her, which obviously only makes things worse. I want to turn the course of this circle the other way. \n\n.", "summary": "\u2013 I want to show my girlfriend how much I love her in everyday life, but I don't know how. Reddit, please help me (us)!"}
{"id": "t3_47lc96", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [29F] beginning to get burnt out, and my Husband [30M] of 1.5 years, isn't the greatest at picking up the slack... how do I get through to him?", "post": "So let me preface this by saying hubs is a great guy. \n\nA little background: We've been together 5 years, living together for 4, married for a year and a half. We are both professionals in our fields and it's completely normal for him to work 55+ hours a week. My job is a little more manageable at 40 hours a week, but I also take on clients privately (would like to work for myself someday) and serve on a Board for a Not-for-Profit, which brings me more than on par with the hours he works. \n\nSo I get it, we're both busy, we're both stressed out a lot of the time, and the last thing anyone wants to do after work is housework, but I can't stand a mess, and Hubs is super stingy (hates ordering in, a maid would be out of the question), so I end up cooking 6 nights a week and taking on the bulk of the chores.\n\nMy problem is that we've HAD this conversation before. He's come home and seen me crying from exhaustion on the couch and we've talked about him pitching in more. He'll cook one or two meals, and then do a few chores, and things will be great for a few days/weeks but then the novelty wears off and he's back to expecting me to do all the cooking/cleaning.\n\nI've made a chore list for him in the past, but he won't exactly do things up to the standard I'm used to (his mother would not approve either, her house is immaculate), and when I try to show him a different way of doing it, it always ends up a tiff (I'm partially to blame, my patience lately has been non-existent). Ultimately I end up taking the chore on again in the end. \n\nWe plan on trying for children later in the year and I can't even imagine what kind of stresses that will bring if this isn't sorted out.", "summary": "How can I get Hubs to pitch in more without seeming like a nagging wife? I would love to hear what's worked in your households :)"}
{"id": "t3_34z2zw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by using my 18 y/o son's razor", "post": "Ok so this was actually my mom that f'd up.  Some preface: I am on the swim team, and I wear a speedo (don't like jammers).  If you are a person that has hit puberty and you wear a swimsuit like that, you need to make sure there isn't any, you know, visible.  We were at dinner today, and we got talking about razors because my younger brother is starting to grow enough facial hair to need to shave.  I have a super cheap electric razor that is pretty rough, and so I have to be really careful so as to not get any razerburn on my face, and super uber careful so as to not get any in \"other places\", for which I mainly use the flip out trimmer on the back of it because it doesn't need to be perfect, just good enough.  Well, my mom was saying that since I had such a cheap razor, and there was a costco coupon for a nicer one, I could get a nicer one along with my brother.  I was pretty happy about this, because it would be nicer to not feel like I am scratching my face when I shave, and that it would be nice for other places too because, as a swimmer, I need to keep things under control.  As I said this, her eyes grew wide and she metaphorically sh!t her pants.  I was confused, and then she uttered \"I.. uh.. used that razor\".  I was startled, and asked why and where.  She said she used it to shave her face on occasion (because women get some fuzz too, just much more slowly) and that it was because I left it out on the counter and it was the first one she saw.  I laughed pretty hard, and she was not that enthused.  After making it clear that she should use my dad's razor, she promised she would never use it again.", "summary": "Parents, never borrow your teenage children's razors, especially if they are swimmers, because it has probably been places that would make you avoid it like the plague."}
{"id": "t3_2l972f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Update] Me [23 M] with my ex-girlfriend [23 F] dated for 8 months after a 3 year break, and 3 years before, broke up after revelation that I had lied about my past", "post": "[Original link\n](\n\nSo it's been a month since my last post and we decided to take a little break, which was nice. She then contacted me about a couple ago and told me that she was ready to forgive me and we met up and had dinner which was great. It was nice being able to laugh and talk without the resentment on either side. Throughout the dinner, though, she made comments about how \"I'm getting what I want\" and that no matter what I do, \"she's still here.\" I obviously told her this isn't what I want, and that she hasn't been there, which I completely understand why she wasn't.\n\nWe hung out the next night and she spent the night. A few days later she says that though she isn't angry at me, she doesn't think she can be with me and get over it. I say I understand, but that means that we shouldn't talk. Surprise, surprise, that doesn't last long and we start talking again. I'm being the guy I want to be with her, doing nice things and actually being thoughtful in hopes that she'll realize I'm not the piece of shit that she thinks I am.\n\nAt this point, I plan on letting her make the moves. Letting her suggest hanging out and talking, and hopefully let that transition into something. I know I want to be with this girl, but I just don't know at what expense? She never wants to hang out with me because she claims that anytime she does, she knows how right it feels and doesn't have the courage to stay broken up and that if we consistently see each other she knows it would turn into a relationship. One thing, though, is that I don't want to jump into a relationship. Our old relationship is dead, and for good reason, and I want to court her again. Take her out on dates, not have it end up with us at each others place for the night, etc.", "summary": "Ex-girlfriend (at the time girlfriend), found out I lied about something in our past and ends the relationship. She is having trouble deciding and I am not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_534yu9", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "What's the best plan of attack for making up the 4 years I wasn't able to make money? (Age:19/Location:US/SC)", "post": "Like with all of my threads, if there is any info you would like to know, just feel free to comment, I love answering questions.\n\nBasic info:Live in South Carolina, out in the country, and make 8 dollars an hour doing clean-up work.\n\nThis might just be me overthinking things, and possibly making it sound worse than it is, but do you guys have any advice for someone who wasn't able to save any cash/work until he was 19?\n\ni'm trying to put as much away as I can, taking as many side jobs/yards as I can handle, but I feel like it might not be enough. I do plan on doing some self investing (i.e. college) but not sure if I should start looking to do some actual investing (for example, mutual funds and the like)\n\nIn any case, I don't have any small/medium purchases, and some people and friends suggested a money market account for the time being, since i don't plan on doing anything too crazy.\n\nI know a lot of people will say, Look at the sidebar! And you would be right, but I just like asking around for more personalized advice.\n\nFor anyone who'se curious, the reason I wasn't able to work/save money involves a parent who I no talk to, and their annoying tendency to raid my bank account for stuff she didn't need. Which is why I just gave up, and decided to focus all of my spare time into schoolwork.\n\nNow that this is over, I currently make 8 or so dollars an hour, have about 350-360 USD in the bank, and not sure what to do with it. I've taken on extra hours, and hopefully plan on getting the max part time hours allowed.", "summary": "19 year old male worried about losing 4 years of earning potential, and wondering if I should just take it easy for the college years, or try and put a tiny bit away for intrest/ investing."}
{"id": "t3_pp8dp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I need help with a friend gone wrong.", "post": "So this post is about a friend I've had for about 4 years or so and he will be called Tyler for the remainder of this post. Tyler has been going through some rough shit; he broke up with his first (and only) girlfriend during the summer that he'd been dating for 2 years and hasn't really gotten over it, he's convinced his parents hate him, and he's feeling very guilty over other breakups that have happened in our circle of friends. \n\nSo he's kind of turned into a dick.\n\nSince the summer, about 2 months after I started dating my current girlfriend, he told me she's not good enough for me and I should dump her. Since he was drunk off his ass I didn't really pay it any mind, however recently it's gotten worse; whenever he's drunk he constantly wants to fight me and telling me I should break up with my girlfriend since she \"isn't good enough.\" And I'm getting really fucking sick of it. \n\nSo I need help. The last thing I want to do is be yet another bad event in his life, but at the same time it's gotten to the point where I'm not really comfortable around him anymore. Worse still is that he acts like he's never said any of the stuff he's said while drunk and expects me to act like I don't care.", "summary": "Friend turned into a dick, tells me to break up with gf constantly, want to tell him to stop being a dick without jeopardizing friendship."}
{"id": "t3_2qnhbc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[23/f] Still in love with my ex [22/f] , but all my friends think I'm crazy. What should I do?", "post": "Hello, quick background my ex and I were together for 2 years and then I went to college. We made the long distance work, but it took its toll and by the end the year we were struggling to cope with not having the freedom to see each other. I broke up with him, hoping that doing so I was salvaging any possible friendship/relationship that might be in the future. But If i'm being completely honest I was young and scared that when he too went to college he would cheat on me or meet someone else. Its been a year or so, and I've got on with my life but I still think about him constantly, just wondering if on a day to day he's okay.\n\nWe still chat but very rarely, which I think has been good for us to get some space. Since we broke up he's become more involved in drugs and slept around. But I don't blame him for it we're not together. But all my friends thinks he has hit rock bottom since we broke up, and the majority try laughing with me about how I dodged a bullet.\n\nI don't know what to do, I still love him. I can see what he's become and he's not the same man but I can't change how I feel. The way I see it telling him how I feel is a lose-lose, he still loves me but we're different people now and it won't work or he doesn't feel the same and I'm heartbroken all over again.", "summary": "in love with my ex, but scared telling him how I feel will end badly either way and the alternative is biting my tongue which is hard enough"}
{"id": "t3_2jdll4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18F] don't know how to react to my boyfriends [18M] online lady friend.", "post": "Me and my boyfriend have been in an exclusive relationship for about 5 months or so, but have been together for a good part of 2 years. He has this friend who lives in England. She's a little bit younger, I think maybe 15 or 16? And I knew she had feelings for him because she used to send him provacative pictures all the time before we were together. (Before he was 18, and he also deleted them afer receiving them.) She now has a boyfriend, I think. \n\nAnyways, I went through his phone to find a skype message with this girl. He always said he'd never respond to her and that she was annoying and clingy. The messages I found would actually show him initating conversations. Whatever, no big deal.\n\nThen, I saw a message where he mentioned me. She had said something asking about me or something. He said to her that I was \"kinda his girl thing but not really because he is afraid of commitment.\" Um, what?\n\nI confront him about this, he gets mad and says that was from a really long time ago. He says some rude things. It would have made since maybe 8 or 9 months ago, because that's what he would tell me. But it wasn't. It was from not even two months ago. He told me he loved me then, and told everyone I was girlfriend then. There was no confusion in our relationship then. We had even planned to move in together.\n\nI called him out on this and he said that \"unlike me\" he doesn't get hit on all the time and it feels good to talk to someone who gives him attention and who isn't always mad at him all the time. I felt a little bad after this, but I always try to talk to him and he's the one who never talks back.\n\nIt's been a week or two and I have since let it go with him, but it still upsets me. Every time I bring it up he gets mad that I go through his phone. He tells me I need to trust him, though every time I've went through his phone has given me a reason NOT to trust him. What do I do?", "summary": "Boyfriend told a girl who had feelings for him that I wasn't really his girlfriend so she would continue to give him attention. I'm pissed."}
{"id": "t3_3y8wfu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26M] feeling like I'm competing with my girlfriend's [22F] family", "post": "I bought my girlfriend a sterling silver necklace with a Sapphire for Christmas. I got it on sale, regular $175, I paid $50. Today she goes to her parents house (we don't get along at all). They bought her a necklace too (they probably spent $1000 on her this year). Her parents gave her 3 large gifts prior to Christmas. She walks in today and the first thing she says, while carrying two huge bags, is \"I have too much stuff\". Then she proceeds to tell me about how the necklace they bought her costed 6x as much as the one I bought her. She can't understand why I'm annoyed. Am I wrong for feeling annoyed? I feel like it was just rude of her to go on about how expensive the gifts she received from her family were.", "summary": "Bought GF necklace for Christmas, her family also bought her one. She throws it in my face that theirs costed way more. I'm annoyed. She doesn't understand why."}
{"id": "t3_4rijzh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [31 M] am not a desirable romantic partner. I would like to know how to improve myself.", "post": "I [31 M] have been in one relationship. We met on Twitter. I dated her [30 F] (This was 4 years ago, I was 27), long-distance, relationship lasted a few months. She broke up with me over Facebook without given a reason; does not talk to me.\n\nI have a fairly small circle of IRL friends [20s/30s M/F], mostly women, and a larger circle of online friends [20s/30s M/F]. I've been increasingly lonely, especially as so many of my friends are getting married/pregnant. I've been trying \"everything\" to meet someone: Internet dating, speed-dating, asking friends to fix me up, etc. for quite some time now. This isn't working. Nobody is interested in me.\n\nI've decided to quit looking for a relationship for now while I any attempt to find someone to date for now and instead try to work on myself, but I'm not sure what's wrong with me and what I should be focusing on improving or how to set realistic goals so I know I'm actually achieving any change.\n\nI have chronic depression, and anxiety, low self-esteem, and Asperger syndrome (AS).\n\nI hope my post makes sense. Thank you.", "summary": "I [31 M] have given up looking for a relationship for now. I need to know how to improve myself but I'm not sure how."}
{"id": "t3_1p07q4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (16F) want to disobey parents (48M/F) for the first time.", "post": "Ok long story short. My parents are the very overprotective \"tiger\" type parents. They 100% forbid me playing video games, and I've complied with them since I was 12. I really want to get the new 3DS with Pokemon. I talked to them recently about it and they still 100% forbid me playing games.\n\nI am an overachiever, I maintain a 95% average and will be entering university next year. I work very hard, and I have saved up $10.4k from summer jobs ($4.3k this year) and I really want to treat myself to something I have wanted for a long time.\n\nMy parents both work all day, so i would be able to conceal the 3DS from them, and they would never know I got it. This would be the first time in my life that I ever \"rebelled\" against my parents. Should I? I can go and purchase it tomorrow if I want to. But the question is... SHOULD I? I feel like I would be betraying my parents' trust, but I have been under their control for my whole life and I've had enough. But if I get it, and make sure they don't know about it, it won't hurt, will it? Please help, have any of you been in this sort of situation?", "summary": "16 year old girl has very controlling overprotective parents who forbids video games, but wants to disobey them and purchase a 3DS."}
{"id": "t3_1f9qyv", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "It's been two years and I [m26] just cannot get over her [f21] no matter what I do.", "post": "We dated for two years and I just loved the fuck out of her, had never met anyone like her.  She went to school 3 hours away and broke up with me not long after because she said she wasn't happy.\n\nFor the next two years, every break from school she would come home, initiate contact and I would cave and hang out with her.  We fucked, went on dates, everything, and starting last year she started to talk about getting back together, put lyrics about me in her facebook that she still wasn't over me.\n\nAnd yet, in person she still mistreated me, acted like she didn't care, embarrassed me in front of her friends, told me at one point that it was over and we were both hooking up with new people (I had been to try to get over her).  3 separate times I tried to cut her out of my life and she kept coming back.  Complete mindfuck every time.\n\nThis last time I said goodbye was the day after we had sex and she immediately whipped out her phone while laying in bed to go through her online dating profile.  I asked why the hell she had one and she said she was lonely, and well.. I had had enough.  She was freaking pissed that I was trying to cut her out of my life, but I knew I had to.  That was 5 months ago and I haven't heard from her since.\n\nToday I was flipping through fb and happened across a pic she tagged me in, and saw her profile pic had another guy in it, and my heart dropped through the floor.  I am miserable. \n\nHow THE FUCK do I get over her?!  I have dated a bunch of different girls over the last two years and broken up with all of them because I haven't connected with any of them like I did with her.  Please, please help.", "summary": "I have tried everything to get over my ex, and I just can't.  I think she's with someone new now and it makes me want to die. please tell me how to move on."}
{"id": "t3_2lzjy7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my ex [27M], who I dated for one year, he broke up with me last week and now wants to talk about getting back together", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nLong time lurker here. Need some advice on how to approach my situation.\n\nBasically, last week, my boyfriend (27M) of one year broke up with me because he doesn't feel satisfied about where he is in life and he wants to focus on school/work/life/whatever in order to make a positive change. In light of all this, he felt like he couldn't give me the attention that I wanted/deserved in a relationship. But I suggested having a serious talk about how I could support him through this transition. He was saying things like \"pushing me to hang out every weekend isn't really supporting me\" and \"I need to focus on myself.\" Fair enough. I couldn't really say anything to change his mind after that and we broke up. For good. Or so I thought.\n\nRecently, he's been texting me and saying that he loves and misses me. He said that he wants to meet up and try to work something out because, in his words, \"I miss having you in my life\" and \"I realized that you mean a lot to me and what we have is hard to find and build.\"\n\nAs much as I would love to immediately take him back, I'm worried that he would just break up with me again for the same reasons. It seems like he freaks out when things in his life start to get stressful. I feel like the reason we broke up in the first place was because our relationship was becoming a source of stress for him (I recently had to move a couple of hours away from him, which certainly made things harder for us). \n\nHe wants to meet up this weekend to talk about getting back together. He's going to see a therapist soon, so that might offer some perspective too. \n\nI realize that staying broken up is a viable option. But I also want to give him a fair chance to explain himself this weekend. What kind of questions should I be asking him? How will I know that he truly wants to take the necessary steps to make our relationship work? What should I be doing?", "summary": "My ex had broken up with me last week because he needed to focus on himself. He's now having second thoughts and wants to meet up to talk about getting back together. I'm wondering how I should be approaching such a conversation."}
{"id": "t3_1j1kdy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[24M] have one last night with [24F], how should i leave it?", "post": "I'm leaving this weekend to spend time with family before i start graduate school. Im in love with her. We have never talked about it, but im sure she at least feels similarly (this is coming from the way we interact plus 3rd party talks with friends who also hang out with us). We were always in relationships with diffrent people at diffrent times. As the great ted mosby said \"all you need is chemistry and timing.\" We sure as shit had chemistry, like crazy awesome chemistry, but no timing.\n\nSo here it is, last day ill get to see her and shes coming over tonight to hang out one last time. She currently has a bf (<2 months), im leaving for graduate school that i worked really hard for but i could potentially put on hold. Should i just leave it the way it is? tell her how much i care about her but dont reveal my feelings? That way i could look back on things with a romantic 'what if' but im so afraid im making a huge mistake. If i tell her how i feel and she rejects me im not sure how i would feel about being completely wrong about interpreting her signals plus it would be a shitty way to leave our friendship. If she yes then im putting off my career which i worked hard for, for a chance on love that i don't even know will work out. Im so lost....", "summary": "It's a pretty hard decision to make between a career you love and a girl that has you feeling you may be leaving a soul mate behind, whats sad is i can't say for sure she feels the same."}
{"id": "t3_2oe7te", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "3D modeling - Avoiding the use of editorial licenses while providing real world / analogous 3D models?", "post": "So selling 3d models with an editorial license is a drag, because using 3d models that have an editorial license is a drag... (you have to get permission from original rights owners before you can use it in games).\n\nI'm trying to find a way to rationalize the process selling 3d analogues of real world items without invoking anything. Obviously, some cars in Grand Theft Auto have real world analogs, like Ferrari... beyond simply removing trademarked and copyrighted symbols, you can't argue that a 96% accurate 3d model somehow represents a knockoff or counterfeit, can you?\n\nOr a real world case, this doesn't translate well should still be applicable to 3d models. You list a Zippo lighter on ebay, Zippo sents you a C&D and ebay removes the listing automatically (happened to me). Am I allowed to re-list that item under a generic name? Or is my only resort to simply destroy the item since it's irrefutably a knockoff or counterfeit. Or can I just re-list it titled \"Generic Lighter\".", "summary": "Is there some \"generic - for purposes of real world analog\" rationale for using and selling 3d models depicting real world products (without having to limit it to editorial license, but full-use instead)."}
{"id": "t3_2nro93", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25/F] boyfriend [26/M] of 5 months doesn't comfort me when I'm upset", "post": "We've been together for almost five months now. Some things that may make the problem clearer. We live about 30 minutes away from each other. He has a car but I don't. I go over to see him by taking two buses and it takes me more than an hour to reach his place.\n\nI was really upset yesterday. I was telling him about it by texting him occasionally during the day. Around 5, I decided to ask him if I could come over to his place. He told me his friends were coming over to his place. I told him I didn't want to be alone and moping in bed the rest of the night. He responded by saying he was really sorry I was having a really bad day. That was all I heard from him last night.\n\nI always tend to support him when he is upset. I went over to his place and waited for over two hours outside his apartment (I didn't have a key) just to be with him when he was upset.\n\nIt's 10 am on a Saturday here and I'm waiting for him to text me. I am going to tell him I don't want to see him tomorrow (we had plans) and that he chose to spend last night hanging out with his friends instead of comforting his girlfriend tells me what his priorities are. \n\nAm I doing the right thing? Feel free to ask me questions as I may have left things out.", "summary": "Boyfriend didn't let me go over to his place when I was upset; opted to spend time with his friends and hasn't texted me since 6 last night."}
{"id": "t3_1bzy14", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I not completely screw up moving out?", "post": "I'm going to be moving out of my parents apartment soon and moving very far away (from New York to South Carolina) and I'm trying to figure out what the best way to not get screwed.  I've searched reddit and it seems most of the people moving are wealthy enough to where things are going to be tough but manageable they're just looking for tips.  They have a job lined up or they have a SO they're moving in with so it makes things easier.\n\nRight now I only have a GED and some coursework in college.  I'm staying with a friend for a bit so housing immediately isn't a concern (though I am looking before I move) and I don't have a job for right when I get down there (the ones that I've received asking for interviews want to do it in person so I have to wait until I get down there).\n\nI'm moving as the parent I'm living with has screwed me over an insane amount of times (brining my credit score down because I was dumb and trusted her to pay for things I sign on and stealing money from me), and I'm moving out of New York just because it's too expensive to live here and the job market doesn't exist, at least for people with no degrees.\n\nI'm looking to go back to college once I get settled down there and don't have to pay out of state tuition but I'm just insanely nervous about the move and am looking for any advice I can get.  Hoping that someone in a similar situation can throw me advice.", "summary": "Moving to a different state alone, no degree, no job lined up, temporary housing at a buddies, any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3byiea", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [18 F], 5 months, are arguing over her friend always being around her.", "post": "A few months ago, my girlfriend had this friend who was crazy over her. Always asking her out and wanting to date her while we were together. She shut him down a few times but he kept trying. She told him that she needed him to stop talking to him after consulting me and another of her friend. He completely ignored her request and kept trying to push himself in her life until she completely forgets about it.\n\nNowadays, they are still talking. He's always stalking her, texting her, joining her when she plays online games, being on Skype calls with her. \n\nI keep asking to Skype call her but she says she's in one with her sister already. 30 minutes later I find out she's in a Skype call with the guy as well. Tells me it's actually a group call and that friend and her sister are both in it.\n\nI'm getting annoyed by his stalker behavior and asked her that she should sometimes tell him to give her space so I can have some privacy with my girlfriend but instead she gets upset over this and won't talk to me. I didn't think that was unreasonable seeing the circumstances, right?\n\nWhat do you guys think? Am I being an asshole? What should I do?", "summary": "Guy has crush on girlfriend, she tells him to leave her alone. Guy ignores it and they are now together all the time. I want her to distance herself from him but she doesn't want to."}
{"id": "t3_2c2fk5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I am a 31 year old man, I just started dating a 37 year old woman I've known for about 2 years, my question is this: is the romantic, twitterpated feeling at the beginning of a relationship neccisary for the relationship to be good/last?", "post": "I'm 31 and not experienced dating, she is 37 and much more experienced than I.  My past attempts at dating have been squashed by my own in securities, but with her, I have not struggled much with the same problems.  In the first two weeks I did but I was able to work through the feelings and get past them. I genuinely feel I'm falling in love with her but I have only felt a small bit of the exciting dopamine fueled romantic feelings that I had in the past failed attempts.  She struggles with bipolar disorder, and we had a long discussion the other night when she was feeling particularly low.and one point she confessed that she did not feel romantically towards me either, and was not sure she ever would.  There was no hint that this meant she wanted to change our relationship in any way, but I have been thinking a lot about the conversation. Things I know: I feel safe when with her, and she feels the same, we love each others company, and while we don't get to see each other all the time I have never doubted her care for me, but I alsonknow that this is not what I had initially expected when asking her to date.", "summary": "my partner and I don't feel the romantic twitterpated feeling that is common at the start of a relationship. Have any of you experienced this, and is it a bad thing?"}
{"id": "t3_3cgt39", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my boyfriend [24M] of 2 years, not sure how to feel", "post": "We've been through thick and thin, with him mostly going through the hard stuff since I have a plethora of mental issues (BPD and OCPD), lash out constantly, am mentally immature, etc. and generally haven't been there for his emotional needs.\n\nHowever, he said something in all seriousness that has me, quite frankly, feeling like shit. I guess he's at the end of his rope, but he said something essentially along the lines of, \"yes, you are attractive enough to get guys to hook up with you, but they probably won't have the patience to stick around and love you like I do.\"\n\nSomething about that statement didn't sit right with me, but he's usually super super loving and patient with me. I do somewhat agree with his statement, as I am more than a handful to deal with (I self harm and deal with serious depression) but it was just a bit shocking to hear directly from him. Am I just too sensitive, or what? I appreciate everyone's feedback.", "summary": "Boyfriend said something hurtful but I'm not sure if I'm too sensitive or it's just the plain truth."}
{"id": "t3_pdli9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is he having an emotional affair?", "post": "I am a 22yo female and have been in a relationship for almost 3 years now with the same man. Recently he has made friends with a new co-worker (he just changed jobs) and they talk and text all the time. She is often the first person he texts when he sees something funny, then he will text me. They have inside jokes and secrets and he has lied to me about her feelings on me. She has sad that she thinks I want to kill her and that I need to trust her. She said this after openely flirting with him in front of me. I do NOT want to kill her, but I found that to be tacky. She told me that she doesn't care if he can flirt well because it is not important yet. I tried telling him about it, but he just brushes it off like it is nothing. What should I do, is it even anything to be worried about?", "summary": "Boyfriend made friends with a new girl who doesn't like me and tells him but he doesn't think it is a big deal."}
{"id": "t3_4acaan", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Is now a bad time to quit my job without another lined up? Oil and Gas experience", "post": "So I am a young 20s F, been working at the same job for 3 years out of college as a field / manager position for an oil and gas company. We have laid off 80% of our work force in my state in the last year and a half, so as you can imagine the work atmosphere right now is terrible. They have decreased out time off to reduce necessary employee count, resulting in me now working 2 weeks on call 24/7, followed by a few days off, then repeat (I see this as a salary cut). My bonus has also been reduced by 20% while my responsibilities increased. \n\nSo, I am ready to quit. I don't have another job lined up and it is really hard to apply to jobs when you are constantly working and your days off don't necessarily line up with good times to interview. A lot of people are telling me if I get through this downturn, it will look really good for me to be one of the \"survivors\". I am due for a promotion soon. But I am worried if Oil comes back up, we will be understaffed and my life will be even worse. Does the fact that I've already made it past 80% reduction mean employers will understand the toxic environment I am leaving? For the record, I am looking to get out of Oil and Gas completely, however I am highly specialized for my current job besides my management experience, which I am hoping to try to sell for a new position.", "summary": "I hate my life and my job is making me miserable, I work all day and night, want to quit without another job lined up but I am afraid I am giving up a good opportunity."}
{"id": "t3_1n779c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my boyfriend [23M] of 5 years are in a LDR for the first time. How do I manage this? What works?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 5 years (like 15 days shy) and living together for 2 and he recently left to go overseas for a graduate program. We are both in MA programs but he is in England and I'm still in the States. We have a very strong relationship and have openly discussed getting engaged in December (we are both pro that idea). The LDR would end in 2 years when we both graduate and then we agreed to go to PhD programs together.\n\nI am uncertain how to handle the stress and loneliness of a LDR. He has never cheated but with him being so far away with a close female friend I cannot help but worry. The time difference (8 hours) makes it very difficult to talk with him and feel like we are still part of each other's lives. \n\nI don't know if there are any tips for LDR or how to keep the fire alive sorts of things. I guess, my main issue is that I'm a terrified that since I can't be there to meet his needs he'll find someone else who can.\n\nI have already initiated a plan to lose about 15 pounds before I see him again as a kind of \"Surprise baby, I'm sexy now!\" thing. I am busy with my own program so I'm working towards that to keep me busy. I have a few friends here but since I'm late to graduate many of them have moved away. My family is also fragmented since the death of my mom so family support is minimal. \n\nIf there is anything else you need to know, I'll try and check regularly to answer anything I should have included. \n\nI'd mostly like opinions on what I should do to try and make the LDR successful and what helpful hints might be out there. Or hey, just your opinion on the matter too. Like, how do you shake this fear of infidelity even without evidence there is one?\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Will be apart for 2 years (on and off) and need to know what works and how to handle the stress of being alone and fear of him cheating."}
{"id": "t3_3vn452", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not meeting Kobe Bryant", "post": "So finals week is happening at my uni next week and I've been killing my hours cramming my head in books and revisiting notes. One of my study partners planned to go to the library this morning at 9AM and stay all day, to which I responded, \"I'll swing by around 10 and study with you\", and I was totally going to do that, but I decided to stay in bed until 2 because I was tired. I show up at the library with my Lakers shirt on since they played in my city the previous evening and I forgot to rep the shirt then, and my partner smiles and says,\"Oh you're a lakers fan? I have something to tell you. Guess who I met about 2 hours ago\". Turns out the Lakers practiced at my Uni's gym today before they headed off to the next stop on their road trip. So fuck. I missed my last chance to meet Swaggy P and the Black Mamba before he retires. He is literally 1% of the world that has met Kobe Bryant in person and held a conversation with him. Fuck me. Fuck me being lazy.", "summary": "Supposed to study with friend at 9AM. Stay in bed until 2PM. Friend meets Kobe Bryant and the Lakers at 12PM. FML"}
{"id": "t3_1vix0k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/M] confused about sudden break up with girlfriend [22/F] (X-post)", "post": "I'll attempt and keep this short...\n\nBeen with my gf for 6 years, lived with her (200 odd miles away from our hometown) for 3. She attends university and I work a crappy job to pay the bills.\n\nPast week or so she's not been feeling good so I didn't expect much affection. Yesterday morning I texted her from work after dreaming she dumped me, realised something was up. She said she loved me and she wants to find a solution as she feels unsure about us. I stupidly forced her to admit we were breaking up. Got let off work, met her at uni briefly, seemed very upset but final. Went home, my friends came over, she brought a friend when she finished uni a few hours later for a group chat (bad idea). She wants to sort out issues with our apartment instantly so we can move on.\n\nI'm astonished this has come out of nowhere but she says she's been feeling a bit unsure for a little while. Says she never told me because she didn't know how to talk to anyone about this. Didn't even tell any of her friends. She says she's still not sure what the problem is.\nOur friends left the room and we had a goodbye, she held me tight, cried a lot, and then kissed me three times (everyone I've told has been amazed at that part). She left to stay with her friend. I spent the night alone in our apartment.\n\nI took a walk this morning and bought her a rose. She's coming back here for a few hours this afternoon so we can talk.\n\nSo basically, from talking with my parents and friends, I believe I've been lax on doing stuff she wants to do (taking walks, eating out etc) but she wouldn't tell me, instead we've just been going to the movies/watching GoT/playing Xbox together though she seemed happy with that. She said she thought she might be stressed with her university stuff and wine tasting so I think that has amplified her worries.\n\nI'm not even sure what I want to ask. I just can't get my head around this weird situation. I hope you can help me.", "summary": "girlfriend breaks up with me with no warning, doesn't even seem sure, wants us to sort out moving out instantly."}
{"id": "t3_1sy0ai", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16F] and my [18 M] boyfriend of 9 months just broke up, and I don't know how to handle it", "post": "We had such a good relationship it was perfect. Then he went to college and obviously it was hard but I think we were doing a good job, we would fight somewhat frequently but I thought it was just a little rough patch in our relationship. The other day, he went from saying \"you're beautiful and sexy and I want you\" to \"I think about other girls.\"\nIt blew my mind. I understand he's in college and all, and that he wants is freedom, thats part of the reason I was okay with letting our relationship go, i didn't want to hold him back from being happy. But i thought he was happy with me. \n\nHe keeps saying we're just on a break, and I don't know how I feel about all of this. I want to stay with him and continue our relationship but I also don't want him to be unhappy. Obviously I'm going to want to hook up/ be with him when he gets back, but I don't want to be the girl he just hooks up with while he's home.\n\nI could try getting with other guys, but I don't feel comfortable doing that. I love him and i want him, but he thinks differently. He's made it clear that he loves me and all but if he truly did why would this be happening? I don't understand. Help?", "summary": "boyfriend and I break up because he wants to experience other things such as girls while at college, and I don't know how to handle it"}
{"id": "t3_4vy16y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22F] fear that my boyfriend [34M] of one year doesn't want to live with me....", "post": "I asked him the other day where he see's us in a year and he said 'living somewhere different' and then I asked 'together?' and he reacted like 'whoa slow down' (in a jokey but kind of non-jokey way) then he went on to say he doesn't see us having bought a place and living together but asked if i'd want to live with him when he gets the new place he's looking at... not in a 'i want you to live with me' kind of way but in a 'would you realllllyy want to' kind of way (don't know if that makes ANY sense but more like he wasn't suggesting we do but asking if that's what i want) and then dropped the conversation...\n\nI am struggling with anxiety issues at the moment which he knows of and I am working on. What I am struggling with the most is understanding if I am rationally thinking or not, so sometimes it helps to ask the internet...\n\nDo I mention this again and make sure he wants to live with me at some point within the next couple of years or drop it and wait until it comes up in conversation again?\n\nI've been being very insecure to my boyfriend and asking lots of questions or how he feels blah blah blah... so I'm trying to stop this as it's making our relationship difficult. But I'm struggling to drop this and I don't know what to do...\n\nSO i'm more asking not what I should do about the him and the living together situation but more should I mention it again or not?", "summary": "Going crazy over-thinking everything - is this rational thinking and should I mention something to my boyfriend who I don't think wants to live with me?"}
{"id": "t3_299dbd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Could the way my father treated my mother affect my [30F] self esteem?", "post": "I have self esteem that varies between extremely low/non-existent, to average (logically I know I'm an attractive, relatively intelligent, successful individual, but I don't always feel that way).\n\nIn an earlier post ( I talked about how a man has never said he loves me, and I discussed my most recent failure with a friend of 8 years who immediately started avoiding/ignoring me after we slept together.\n\nI've been doing a lot of soul searching to figure out what I'm doing wrong, but one thing that I'm doing right is personal appearance.\n\nI never have chipped nails (always manicured and pedicured), I pluck and shave daily. I groom my ladybits appropriately. I self tan lightly, always wear a bit of make-up (and will re-do make-up if going out after work). I work out and have a nice toned body. Floss and brush daily, dye my grays, clean out my ears, dress appropriately for the occassion, invest in good shoes, coordinate my outfits, etc...\n\nI wouldn't call myself high maintanance (I don't look like a Playmate or a perfectly-coiffed celebrity -- and I'm not drop-dead gorgeous), but I know I put in much more care than many of my friends do.\n\nAnd I sometimes wonder if the reason I do all this but still feel (and am treated) as though I'm \"not enough\" is because of little comments I heard my father give to my mother...\n\nI remember once we were going out on our boat, and my mom (who has always had a bit of trouble with her weight) was in a bathingsuit. She's not the most stylish lady, but she tries. Anyway, I heard my dad criticize her bikini line, and saw her react shamefully.\n\nI also used to hear him critique her outfits in slightly condescending ways, or the way she would talk to people (my mom isn't the most socially adept).\n\nAnd every rejection I receive, I assume it's some sort of disgusting personality or physical trait that I have yet to address.", "summary": "I'm always worried there is something repulsive about me. Could it be because of the way my father treats my mom? And will I ever overcome this.... if at all?"}
{"id": "t3_4dlosk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my crush [19 F], (who happens to be my roommate's sister) am I wrong to avoid her?", "post": "I have a crush on my roommate (also best friend)'s sister. I consider it to be a childish crush, since I don't even know her that well (that being said, I do think she is lovely, easily one of the nicest and kindest people I've ever met), and because she is my best friend's sister, I feel guilty for liking her. \n\nIt's gotten to the point to where I'm starting to avoid my best friend because his sister and I talk everyday as we have a class together and I feel like a piece of shi*t when I'm with him. A lot of the time all of our friends will plan a night together and I will make up an excuse not to go purely because she will be there too. \n\nMy crush has caught onto this behavior. She even called me out for never hanging out with her. I almost told her it was because I had a crush on her but I stopped myself. What should I do? Should I tell her that I have a crush on her so she doesn't feel like I hate her? Should I tell my best friend? Is it childish of me to avoid someone simply because I have a little crush on them?", "summary": "I like my best friend's sister. I avoid her because I have a crush and I avoid him because I feel guilty. Is this childish? What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3pn94f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30 M] got an e-mail from my ex [28 F], is she over reacting?", "post": "So 3 months ago my now ex broke up with me because she cheated on me (she came clean). It was hard at the beginning, we lived together for 2 weeks before she found another place to live in and we sas each other a couple of times after that.\n\n2 months after the break up I started to have casual sex with 3 different girls. My ex and I did decided to be distant so it would be easier to get over the separation.\n\nI had an awful week last week, came home each night to an empty appartment. 2 days ago my ex and I started to talk again through sms and one thing leading to another, she came to my place and we slept together.\n\nThe following day I ran into one of our mutual friend, I talked to her for a bit and told her that I met a couple of girls with whom I had casual sex. Today I got a mail from my ex literally insulting me because I should have known that our friend would tell her everything and that it was my revenge. That she suffered those last 3 months. She regrets seeing 2 days ago. \n\nI tried to explain to her that if I wanted to hurt her I have had plenty of time to do it prior to that day, that I did not know that this so called friend would tell her what I told her. She said she does not believe me and blocked me from whatsapp.\n\nNow I do not want to get back into that relationship but she was and she is someone very important to me, in fact, she is the only women I ever loved. I want to try and fix things up but I can't help to have the feeling that she is trying to blame me for the end of our relationship.\n\nSo here is my question, is she over reacting to this, is there a way I can fix things up?", "summary": "My cheating ex learned through a mutual friend that I have had some casual sex, thinks I told our friend on purpose so I can have my revenge. Is she over reacting and is it fixable?"}
{"id": "t3_26z1ak", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22M] met this girl [18F], she says she had to be kept entertained for relationship to work", "post": "I met this girl online, we planned a date but by talking with her I saw some traits I'm not really sure I like.\n\nBasically what she's saying is that she get bored of things (and people) pretty soon and that she needs to be constantly kept wanting me.\n\nQuoting her: \"if you want me to like you, you have to constantly maintain my attention. I get tired of thing easily\"\n\nHaven't met her yet, but doesn't sound good.\n\nI'm not really sure how to handle this sort of situation/girl. \n\nI am what I am and I'm not going to try to be a different guy every night just to entertain her.\n\nAdvices ?", "summary": "I met this girl which looks nice, but she says she gets rited of things and people easily and I am not sure on how to handle this situation."}
{"id": "t3_c9a74", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I get my parents to treat me more like an adult and less like a 9 year old?", "post": "My parents are overprotective like no other. Most people probably say this but it's getting to the point where I can't stand being home during the summer and I still have 3 months till I head back to school. In high school, I might as well have had to hand in a resume of each person I was hanging out with because they wanted to know every single detail. A few days ago, I got a small package in the mail and my mother was literally breathing down my neck watching me open it even though I told her several times that it was a memory card for my", "summary": "Parents are overprotective to the point of watching me open my mail. What can I do to make them respect personal privacy and treat me more like an adult?"}
{"id": "t3_3t3f8h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22/M] girlfriend [23/F] wants to break up because she doesn't want to have regrets", "post": "Hi,\n\nI apologize in advance for the formatting. I am on mobile. \n\nMy girlfriend of 4 1/2 years wants to break up because she is worried that we've been together too long and that we're too young. She says that she doesn't want to have regrets like her parents and end up like her mother (cheated on her dad because she was unhappy). \n\nShe said she is worried that she hasnt experienced enough in life to be tied down but she still loves me and I love her. \n\nShe says she is worried about life together because she doesn't know what to expect. She said she wants to focus on herself as well. \n\nI really don't know what to do in this situation. She is literally the most important person in my life and I can't see myself with a future without her. We have been through so much together. \n\nWould someone be able to help me? For such a long time I felt like life was a tunnel that I was walking through with her and now I feel like I'm alone in that tunnel and I have no idea what to do. \n\nShe has never done anything wrong to me and I haven't done anything wrong to her and all of this just feels so sudden. I was literally with her last night and slept over and everything was fine. \n\nAfter our talk she said she wants to think about us. \n\nHow can I keep her? Obviously I'm not going to force her to stay in something she doesn't want to be in but I know we have a chance together. The only thing I've texted her since our talk is asking if she got home okay cause she was crying while we talked.", "summary": "Girlfriend of 4.5 years wants to break up because she's afraid she'll have life regrets about not trying things and ending up like her parents relationship (divorced)"}
{"id": "t3_1wras3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Don't want to come off as desperate, but was I used? [F 20] [M 25]", "post": "So I'm a 20 year old lady who went to an all girls catholic boarding school and finally got away from home to an out of state college. You see where this is going. Met this guy at a coffee shop, he's older, grad student, tall and smart. *Hello.* I give him my number and we start texting and set up a time to meet again.\n\nWe meet for a date, and end up back at my place. Because it's been almost 6 months, I'm lonely, he's hot, not going to slut shame myself, ect, we have fun. Throughout it all he's saying all the plans he's got with me for next time, it's going well, he leaves.\n\nIt's been four days, no contact. Do I contact him? I was the one who asked for his number, and invited him back to mine, and so I've already been the aggressor in all of this and frankly I'm confused. I don't want to be too desperate, I'm just confused as all get out. I don't have much experience with relationships or even hookups (though this story might suggest otherwise, it took me a long time to get up my courage to jump into the dating scene and well, I sort of floored it with him.) So I have no clue.\n\nIt just seems odd that he wouldn't text at all especially when he seemed happy leaving and was talking about next time. And before, when I was talking with him, he would text pretty frequently with me.", "summary": "Sexy man and I have sexy times, and he doesn't text after. Confused and hoping he hasn't been hit by a bus."}
{"id": "t3_1lqomi", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Deposit Refund Issue - more in the post, please help!", "post": "Hey Guys,\n\nMy wife and I just moved out of a townhome in GA and our previous landlord is refusing to refund our full deposit due to carpet damage from our cats and a routine visit from an electrician. Our initial security deposit included first month's rent and a pet deposit. The contract states they can keep 50% of the pet deposit for cleaning, but the language does explicitly allow for additional withholding. \n\nThe landlord stated that they will keep an amount equal to the full pet deposit as well as the total cost of the electrician's visit. I have asked for receipts to provide proof of the electrician's visit and the carpet repair but they are not responding to our requests (it's been just over 30 days since we moved out). \n\nDo we have any rights to the receipts (and can we argue the costs), or should we accept the current refund and move on?", "summary": "Live in GA; landlord kept full pet deposit and additional money for repairs, won't provide receipts of repair - do we have a right to the receipts for proof?"}
{"id": "t3_49046o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help me [27M] decode how exactly she [27F] feels", "post": "Though not an update, this is a change in situation from a post I made previously, that I thought was open and shut. The other post has more background.\n\nPreviously: \n\n**Recap**\n\n\"Zoe\" [27F] is smart, successful, and kind. I should've confessed feelings for her long ago. I'm simultaneously more confident around her because she's a trusted friend, and less confident because she inspires me so much personally and professionally that I'd consider it a huge loss to lose her. But I missed my chance and then distanced myself from her for two months because we both have extremely busy careers I didn't want to get in the way of.\n\nLast week after reconnecting with her, I asked her out, but she wanted to bring another guy. At Reddit's encouragement, I asked her directly if she was single. Her response was that she is, and that the guy is just an acquaintance, but she stopped responding after that so I thought she wasn't interested, and that I had lost a valued friend.\n\nToday she reconnected, and is asking me out. Tonight. No mention of some other guy. I'm very confused. How to approach this with minimal awkwardness?", "summary": "Walled off a girl because I was indecisive. Reconnected to ask her out but thought I lost her. Now she's asking me out and I'm not sure what's going on."}
{"id": "t3_3fd3vo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my GF [27 F] 3.5Y, she can't seem to get her finances in hand and she just lost her job.", "post": "I met my girlfriend 3 years ago online. We've had a fairly tumultuous relationship - we both struggle with anger, and it leads predictably to a lot of fights. We've both been in counselling, and that's calmed down a lot. We've both been guilty of some nasty shit, and we've tried to forgive and leave it in the past.\n\nHowever, there is one thing we've never been able to settle down on. I am decent with money, and she spends it like it grows on trees. I grew up in a lower middle-class household, and she grew up in a wealthy one. The issue is, although I hold down a good job as an engineer, I still expect her to contribute. We've struggled a lot with getting her to be responsible with money, and she's repeatedly admitted to spending all of her savings on useless shit - including junk food, when I pay for a personal trainer. \n\nI know, it's her money. It's not my business. However, she's promised me repeatedly that she's saving her money, and that became important recently when she lost her job. After that, it all came out of the woodwork - most of her savings are gone, some spent on her student loans, plenty spent on more useless shit and cheating on her diet. She has enough savings for maybe two months paying her necessary bills, which don't include paying me for room and board. I have counseled her repeatedly to make sure she has enough in savings for room and board for several months. Apparently she ignored it. \n\nThis has happened before. She's never consistently paid me rent out of her own paychecks. When I've gotten rent, it's been from student loans for room and board. I love her to death, but at some point I need to cut her loose, because she's incapable of being a grownup. Reddit, how many more shots do I give the woman I love to turn into a grownup?", "summary": "My GF lost her job and it came out that in spite of what she'd been hinting at (never explicitly saying) she has very little in savings. Not the first time she's been irresponsible with money at my expense."}
{"id": "t3_20dewk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think I [26 M] might be being incredibly shallow towards my girlfriend [23 F] of 6 months.", "post": "**Background**: I have been dating my girlfriend for 6 months. Things were going pretty well. We got along well, sex was pretty good, we met each other's families, and we get along with each others friends pretty well.\n\n**Issue**: We have openly talked about how we are not super attracted to each other. Neither of us has the impulse to just tear the clothes off the other. Despite that, our sex is usually pretty good. Lately, I have noticed myself \"just going through the motions\" when being intimate with her. I should mention that my girlfriend is overweight and I am not. She is not super obese or anything, but she is overweight by the BMI definition. I am not overweight. She tore her ACL playing softball a year ago. I thought maybe she would lose the extra pounds after her knee healed, but this has not happened. She has mentioned that she wants to shed the extra pounds. However, her actions don't follow through on this. She skips workouts, doesn't seem to have a lot of portion control (she doesnt eat giant portions, but I've never heard her say 'no thanks. I'm on a diet'), and I she recently laughed about eating a can of pringles. So I think this is contributing to my lack of attraction to her. Also, I think I have some issues about thinking of other women. I haven't slept with a lot of girls in my life (like 3) and I constantly wonder if I could maybe have a few flings and then settle down. I know that sounds bad but its true...\n\n**Current Status**: I felt strongly about talking to her today about how I have been feeling. I asked her how she felt things were going. She didn't say a whole lot. I told her I haven't felt too romantic towards her lately and that I know I like her, but maybe not in a romantic sense. I didn't come out and say the weight thing is an issue. That's hard for me to do because I know she's had a previous eating disorder. Anyways, we're on a break now. I feel lonely, but I don't think that's a great reason to go back to her.", "summary": "GF and I are on a break. We get along great, but she has some weight issues that bother me. I kind of want to be single and fool around, but I also miss her. Am I a piece of shit?"}
{"id": "t3_3dc33p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Broke up with gf 10 Months ago- Fearful that she may be the one that \"(I made\") got away", "post": "Hey First time poster here so be gentle. Or not. Do whatever you want- who the hell am I to tell you what to do\n\nLong story short dated someone for over a year and had a great time. I am 30 M and she is 29F. When I turned 30 I kind of freaked out (is this the girl I am going to marry? Everyone else is getting married? Is she expecting that I get married? Is this the last girl I will ever kiss? Sleep with?) The advice I got from everyone was things like \"well you would know if you loved her/ If you loved her you wouldn't even think of these things and you would know.\"\n\n I don't think I'm that kind of guy- I have a hard time making decisions and I must admit that I am not in touch with my feels a lot of the time. Breakup was in September and it is now July.\n\nI work in finance and the hours suck and Im always tired and thats one of the reasons I broke it off but I have thought about her basically every day- but i am afraid that (1) Maybe she won't take me back  and(2) Maybe we aren't going to work out and i will break her heart again, and i really really do not want to hurt her.\n\nLong story short I think about her when I hear  romantic music (F&^& you Michael Buble!) and I have recently started to look at old pics of us when times were good. I feel like because my life kind of sucks right now for other reasons I am romanticizing our past relationship and I am searching for the last thing that made me happy. I have slept/kissed others and I still think about her. I really don't have an interest in getting to know another girl/woman as I just don't\u2026..care\n\nI fear that if I keep waiting and she may find someone and I will have missed my chance and I am not trying to be an a**hole and deny her being happy but I feel like I could be happy and she could be happy with me if I just get my f**king thoughts and shit together\n\nHelp me Obi Wan Reddit", "summary": "Long Story Short: I broke up with girl 10 months ago. I miss her. Afraid if we get back together I will hurt her again. Not sure what I want."}
{"id": "t3_2b5akv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my boyfriend [21M] of 4 years, tells me I'm only attractive when I'm happy.", "post": "I've been struggling with depression and body image issues for years, before we even started seeing each other. A little over a year ago I caught him emailing a girl from high school. The emails included pictures of her in a sexual nature. We fought and he told me his reason for doing it was that we hadn't had sex yet and he was horny. \n\nThe reason we hadn't had sex yet was because I was not on birth control and he had never said anything about wanting to so I thought it wasn't that big of a deal. He was always shutting down my advances because \"he was tired.\" He never initiates and hasn't initiated in over two years. He then tells me he doesn't find me attractive when I'm anything but happy. \n\nGreat. It's been over a year since all that happened. I'm starting to get feelings of paranoia and mistrust towards him. I never got any help for my depression. I just stopped caring about it honestly. I tried to fake it till I was actually happy. We started having sex, but he still never initiates and is always \"too tired.\" I constantly feel like he's not attracted to me. I feel so unloved and ugly right now. He gets defensive if I try to talk to him about it, or he tells me he'll try more and nothing happens.\n\nI know this is a mixture of my faults and his. I just want him to understand that I'm really hurt by what he said. I don't know how to get over it.", "summary": "Told me the reason he's not attracted to me is because I always seem sad. I feel gross and ugly and even more sad."}
{"id": "t3_bk5ih", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I am a \"functioning alcoholic.\"  I tried AA, but can't get over the overwhelming religiousness.  Help?", "post": "I don't mean to talk down on AA.  It saved my alcoholic mom, who I love.  But the other thing about my mom is that she's very, very right-wing.  It makes me sad because she's a caring person, just really set in her conservative ways.  Moving on, I'm a 26 year old alcoholic.  I pay the bills, but I'm drinking 10-12 drinks, 5 nights a week; my life is a blur.  Most of the people in my life don't know that I have a problem.  I quit drinking once for almost a year, and then had my heart ripped out by my ex-girlfriend, and went right back to drinking.  I've been to plenty of AA meetings and liked some aspects of them, but most of the people there seemed like they were in a cult.  You're supposed to admit that you're powerless and the that only a \"Higher Power\" can help you.  I know myself, and I will never be able to deal with all that hand holding and praying.  I'm planning on quitting again.  I know I can do this, but I would really appreciate any advice.", "summary": "I'm a reasonably intelligent, agnostic guy, looking for non-religious advice about how to stop being a drunkard."}
{"id": "t3_3q87u5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[30M] How do I help her?[30F]", "post": "So this girl I have been talking to for a while, working towards starting a relationship with, called me tonight. She was sobbing and crying so hard she could barely talk. She wouldn't come right out and tell me what was wrong, but from the way she was avoiding saying what was wrong, I knew what was up.\n\nShe told me that she had just slept with a married man. She was feeling terribly guilty, and kept telling me that she wasn't worthy of my time anymore. I tried to comfort her as best as I could.\n\nShe got out of her last relationship last December, but hasn't gotten over him. He cheated on her multiple times, and didn't find out about any of it until the very end. She is the type to want to maintain friendships, so she didn't cut him out of her life.\n\nOn the phone, I told her that what she did was wrong, and that by feeling guilty, it shows that she knows it was wrong. She kept calling herself a slut, and every time I told her that that is not true. Even the best of people make mistakes.\n\nShe and I are not in a relationship, but I want to be with her. I have no issues with what she did. I think the fact that she called me of all people proves that she cares about me.\n\nSo my question is, is there anything I can do to help her heal her heart, and show her that I do very deeply care for her?", "summary": "girl I am talking to had a one night stand because of her broken heart, how do I help her get over this and her heart break?"}
{"id": "t3_1hu9j6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the best going away gift you've ever given or received?", "post": "Reference: I'm leaving my hometown of 27 years for a career change and life in the city. I've grown up here in this small town in the country with my father, who has raised me selflessly, after my mother broke his heart and left 20 years ago. He worked tirelessly at the local factory and every dime he earned went towards my happiness and well-being. In the few hours he had between jobs he'd teach me baseball or build a sandbox out of out lumber we'd find walking the railroad tracks. I honestly don't know how that man worked so hard on almost no sleep, for years. He is the most selfless man I've ever known. He's worn the same clothes since I can remember, still uses our shoddy lawn mower that makes the job nearly impossible, but simply states, \"Well, It still runs.\" He's just that kind guy. Anyway, it's breaking my heart to leave him & I just need something.. something to give him, something to show him.. everything he means to me. I'm not talking about a new lawn mower or stuff he needs. There has to be way to sum up how much I acknowledge that, appreciate him, and will miss him or so dearly. I'm writing him a letter, but that's as far as I've gotten.\n\nBut I don't mean to stray away from the title itself, it doesn't have to be simply suggestions for him. I have two friends that are like sisters that I also won't see for a long, long time once I move.. and I'd like to do something nice for them as well!\n\nI appreciate any suggestions or going away stories & gifts of your own, thanks Reddit!", "summary": "I'm moving far away from the probably the most amazing & selfless father on the planet & I need help with a going away gift."}
{"id": "t3_zioqb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the most memorable story a stranger has ever told you?", "post": "Last night I was at the bar around when all the older guys start rolling in after work. I sat next to an interesting guy and turned out he liked to talk (As most older guys do to us strapping young lads.) Let's call him Greg\n\nGreg eventually told me a story about when he lived in Nashville on some river or other body of water that had a power plant of some sort also located on it. Apparently there was a tugboat that was used to lug coal by water to the power plant. \nOne night he was drunk with his friends and as they saw the tugboat approaching he grabbed his golf clubs and a large number of balls. It was about 1 am on a weekday so they couldn't have been spotted by the boat. They all start whacking balls out towards the boat with no avail but eventually he said that he layed one out with a 3 wood and knew that he had hit the boat. Seconds after he hit the ball the tugboat layed on it's horn for a good five seconds as he described.\n\nNow at 1 am this is obviously ridiculous and there wouldn't have been any other reason to do so unless it was the ball that hit the boat...\n\nFast forward a year and Gregs in a new bar that his friends just opened and had been open for about 2 weeks. After work one day Greg described that some random guy sat next to him and it turned out to be none other than the tugboat driver and owner... After describing where he lived the owner told the story about the golf ball coming from the area where Greg had described and how he had \"got the bastards back by laying on his horn for a good 5 seconds.\" Apparantly Greg had told this story at the bar recently and all the other regulars who hadn't believed him had all eyes on Greg and about to crack up. Greg described that he remembered that night and how the horn had woken him up and it was a bitch considering he had to wake up at 4:30 to go to work the next day. Feeling a little guilty the owner bought Greg a beer and merrily went on his way.", "summary": "Guy hits tugboat with golf ball, meets tugboat driver in bar a year later and somehow manages to get the owner to buy him a beer"}
{"id": "t3_4spzso", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [18 M] Been talking to this girl for a while [18 F] but I don't think she's interested.", "post": "So me and this girl from my high school have been talking for about 2 months and during the first month and a half, things were going great. We were planning to see each other for coffee during exams, but I didn't have time because I was more focused on studying. She understood that I needed this time, so we went to the library and studied together instead. A few days after we studied, I told her that I liked her and that I enjoyed talking to her. She felt the same way, and said that when she goes to university, she would want to keep talking.\n\n Ever since that day, our conversations have started to gradually decline to the point where she no longer responds to my texts. I've sent her 2 texts asking her if everything was alright and asking her how her day was. I haven't said anything to her that would make her act this way, and I have made the effort of to trying to talk to her about it. At this point, the amount of time I have put into getting to know this girl is insane, and I've gotten to the point where I just want to cut things off with her and move on. She's going to a university outside of my city, while I will be staying here. I need some advice on how I could stop talking to her, without coming off as a jerk. I think of her more as a close friend now, and I want to leave our relationship on a high note if we stop talking. Thanks in advanced and any advice is greatly appreciated!", "summary": "Talking to a girl from my high school, she doesn't seem interested, What is the nicest way of moving on/refrain from talking to her?"}
{"id": "t3_1uvvyh", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Home inspector didn't notify us about the extremely vulnurable/shoddy plumbing system which has now burst", "post": "Hi all, I live in Georgia, and unfortunately with this weeks cold snap, it resulted in several water pipes bursting in my attic and water damage across several ceilings in our house.  Fortunately I was able to cut off the water before any further damage could happen.  When I had a plumber come out to fix the pipes, he basically laughed when he went up to the attic and saw the plumbing system that had been installed by the previous home owner.  In the attic, there was a maze of exposed CPVC (no insulation jackets) pipes all through out the attic.  They were also raised about 2-3 feet in the air with NO hangers.  The plumber said it was basically a disaster waiting to happen and that the only real solution would be to have the entire attic re-piped correctly.  He said he could replaced the broken pipes, but it would just result in another break during the next deep freeze so we went ahead and replaced the entire attic and we are setup with a good PEX system, with a fiberglass insulation sleeve, and the pipes now run low enough to where insulation can be placed on top of it also so we should be good for the future.\n\nSorry, long lead up, but my question is:  Before we purchased our house in 2012, we had it inspected by a home inspector for $400 or so.  He provided us a pretty detailed report about some issues, but NOTHING was mentioned about the shoddy plumbing system that was just waiting to fail.  I went back and looked at the report again to confirm, but I also noticed that apparently \"Private Water systems\" are out of the scope of their inspection/report which I think is RIDICULOUS...  We were first time home buyers and needed an true professional inspection to let us know of any potential problems before purchasing the house.  Do I have any recourse with our inspector?  The plumbers and the insurance adjustor that have come out have both stated that they are amazed the house passed inspection with a water system like that in the attic.  Any help/advice would be much appreciated.", "summary": "Home inspector mentioned nothing about the disaster of a plumbing system in attic, which burst during the latest cold snap.  Any recourse?"}
{"id": "t3_333mqq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my 20 [20F] of 3 years, not sure if I want to continue or date someone else", "post": "I've been with my current girlfriend for 3 years, and I've gotten to know her really well; we lost our virginity to each other, and we ) have come to understand each other fairly well (Though I think I understand her better than she understands me). \n\nAdditionally, we know each other's family fairly intimately. She is the primary catalyst for my conversion to Christianity, which I value, and her family knows mine, but the other girl I feel more of a connection to. Unfortunately, I feel like my girlfriend is more into me than I am into her, and for a while now I've been attracted (emotionally and physically) to the other girl, with whom I am good friends. \n\nHowever, I feel like what my girlfriend and I have is pretty good, though I sometimes think what I could have with this other person might be better; but I'm hesitant to make that leap given all the investment in the current relationship. I care for both women deeply as friends... what should I do? I am commissioning in the Army soon so I will lose the opportunity to be with either of them soon unless we are married...  at times I feel certain, at times lost. Help?", "summary": "Invested in a longtime GF, care for her a lot but not sure if I love her. Another woman seems better for me, but more of an unknown as we have not dated, just friends."}
{"id": "t3_4pdv98", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Just picked up my dress and nearly had a heart attack...", "post": "Figured you guys would appreciate this more than my FH, so I'm unloading here instead of on him...haha. So a little backstory here - I ordered my dress back in March, and have since been put on a medication that's caused my appetite to skyrocket. I've always been petite, so gaining 10-12lbs in a few months has been a bit of a blow to my self-esteem (I know, it could be a lot worse and I'm still at a healthy weight, but I'm totally being a baby about it.) Monday night I got the exciting news that my dress was in, so I went tonight to go pick it up! Yayyyy/pleasegodihopeitstillfits. The lady had me try to put it on over my head...and it won't budge over my hips. Like, at all. Cue major panic and me silently dying on the inside. After a few minutes of trying she decided to have me step into it, and thankfully that worked! Phewwwww. Still a bit snug in my hips, but totally doable. Bonus sigh of relief: found out they're actually discontinuing my dress, so if I had waited much longer to shop I would have missed out!", "summary": "thought my dress didn't fit and came closer to a meltdown than I'd like to admit. Learned the hard way that legs first is the way to go with a mermaid dress! Also, [dress pic!]("}
{"id": "t3_2wy7wk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17F] with my Ex Bf [19M] 1 year 1/2, Left me for his best friend and walked out of my life. Finding it hard to deal with.", "post": "Hi,\nI apologize if this story is too confusing but here goes:\n\nSo I[17F] dated a guy[19M] for a year and a half and our relationship was awesome until the last month when he stopped complimenting me and stuff and revealed he had feelings for his best friend. He told me he wasn't ready for a relationship and didn't love me anymore so he broke up with me in Dec 2014. I was pretty crushed.\n\nAfter the break up the friend (who was friends with me first btw) and her bff stopped talking to me and hung out with him a lot. It really hurt me that they abandoned me- one day I decided to confront them about it and they told me they stopped talking to me because they thought talking about the break-up would upset me too much. I forgave them and moved on.\n\nA month ago my ex told me he still had feelings for me and started treating me like he used to. One day he said he was gonna stop because he didn't want to get back together because he didn't want to end up like couples who break up and get back together a lot.\n\nFast forward to this week, out of the blue he told me he was gonna ask out his friend, and was pretty mean about it. I decided to tell the \"friends\" because I was really mad tbh, and they told me that 2 weeks after we broke up he told them he had feelings for the friend. She also told me I needed to grow up, get over it, and thats how life is. That really hurt /: She knew how much I liked him and still went after him.\n\nThey are now dating and both seem pretty serious. I just feel so hurt I don't know what to do ;(\nMy ex also sent me a goodbye forever text. He was like my best friend so it hurts that he walked out on me like this. Why did he hurt me like this? /:", "summary": "My ex left me for his best friend who was my friend first, and sent me a goodbye forever text. I really miss the friendship a lot. I'm finding it really hard to get over feeling betrayed."}
{"id": "t3_1s3k64", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a [22 M] with a year-long confusing relationship with my friend [19 F]. Is she really even my \"friend\"?", "post": "I'm a college male [22] and I work with a college girl [19] from my school, who has become one of my best friends since January. We took a summer class together, and she flirted with me. When I finally reciprocated, she said she didn't want to ruin our friendship.\n\nFast forward to this semester. She starts overtly flirting with me and calling me \"babe\" or \"boo\" constantly. Remembering what happened, I didn't reciprocate. \n\nYesterday, she told me she thinks I'm \"perfect.\" I started really liking her recently, so I basically told her I feel the same, and she again used the friend excuse. She even told me she started hooking up with a different friend a month ago and regrets it.\n\nMy question is this: Is she just keeping me there as a plan B? \n\nMore importantly, is she even really my friend, if she's wiling to play with my emotions like that?", "summary": "Girl from school that I work with hits on me and calls me babe. When I reciprocate, she says we should just stay friends."}
{"id": "t3_4wbhsy", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Cat still peeing on bed", "post": "Let me start at the beginning. My boyfriend and I adopted our cat Spike in January of this year from the shelter, he will be a year old in October. The shelter spayed him before we took him home and he had no problems when we took him home. He can be a little asshole at times, but thats all cats. We moved from Indiana to Texas this May to a home with 1 cat and her litter of 5 kittens. Roomies got rid of 4 kittens but had to foster another pregnant cat, whose kittens are currently up for adoption (other momma cat was about to get fixed but ended up preggers again, waiting for that litter currently). He started peeing on roommates daughter's bed in June but we figured it was him marking his territory. A few weeks later, he peed on the roommates bed. Again, we thought it was just him marking. Until he started doing it on our bed. Every day. Took him to the vet to check everything out and he has a UTI. Started him on antibiotics about a week ago. For a few days he was going back in the box (we uncovered it and clean it everyday). A couple days ago, he peed on the pillows so they got thrown in the washer. Then last night, right in front of me, he peed on the sheets. Depending on if he stops or not, he's scheduled for another UA on Tuesday. Money is a factor right now. Me and boyfriend were wondering if there was anything we could use to discourage him from peeing on the bed again. We were going to look into Feliaway but have read mixed reviews and dont want to spend money we dont have on something that may or may not work. Hes fine with the kittens, he loves playing with them. So anything that wont cost an arm and a leg would be greatly appreciated. We are at our wits' end as to what to do.", "summary": "Cat with UTI on meds still peeing on bed, need him to use the litterbox again, but on a budget."}
{"id": "t3_4tv3fd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19m] Roommate's [20m] laziness is driving me mad.", "post": "About 1.5 years ago I bought myself a house and lived there mostly alone. About 6 months ago one of my good friends left his job in his town about 6 hours away and expressed interest in renting one of my rooms. Although he had no work he had quite a lot of savings and planned on getting a new job down in my city within the first month.\n\nThat was in January, it's now July and he very barely looks for work anymore and even worse does little to no house work. He doesn't cook or clean and I am starting to get fed up with cooking and cleaning for a fully grown adult. \n\nThe problem is that after 6 months of bills and rent his savings have run to a very minuscule amount, so much so that he can't afford to pay for bills or rent anymore. Being as he is still my best friend I have let him stay for free with the condition that he looks harder for work and cleans up a bit more around the house. That was a week ago now and I have still had too cook every night and spend my days off from my full time job cleaning.\n\nI don't want too have to kick him out. What can I do?", "summary": "= Roommate can't afford to pay rent anymore and does no housework, how can I kick him into gear?"}
{"id": "t3_2ytb9s", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Mortgages - Understanding an Ad I heard on the radio", "post": "Traditionally I have understood that you don't want to be upside down on a mortgage so you normally have a larger downpayment and opt for a shorter term to get less interest accrued on your loan.  However on my way into work today I heard something and I want to try to understand what/how their premise works.  The ad stated that going for a long term and a minimal down payment and basically paying interest on the house is actually the way to build wealth.   The ad is from a \"financial adviser\" agency but the does talks in my area, but I want to understand why/how this could work out to be beneficial.  Does it simply have to do with them claiming that they can get a better RoR on investments (stocks, etc) off a down payment that would nullify the interest?  I don't have much more information on the ad, but I thought it would be interesting to understand why/how this could work out.", "summary": "How can a long term 30 year with minimal down payment that you never intend to pay off be better than a large down payment and shorter term loan 15 year for a persons future?"}
{"id": "t3_skwfu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, is it a bad sign that no guy wants to have sex as often as I do?  Help!", "post": "Ok, Reddit, I really need your help clearing some things up here.  \n\nI'm a 22 year old, relatively attractive female.  My guy friends are always telling me that they wish they could find a girl who wants to have sex all of the time, and that any guy would be lucky to have me because I'm that kind of girl.  BUT whenever I'm in a sexual relationship (be it a romantic relationship or just a friends with benefits situation) the guy NEVER wants to have sex as often as I do. I'm not sure if guys are just saying that they want sex all of the time and they just don't mean it, or they just don't want it with me all of the time.\n\nEvery guy I've had a sexual relationship has said that I'm the best they've had, and the vast majority of them have tried to get me to help their now girlfriends to become better in bed.  If I had it my way I would get to have sex with the same one or two people AT LEAST 3 times a day, preferably 5, every day.  And if I don't get to have sex, I would love to at least get to give them head because that can get me off too.  I can easily have 6 or 7 orgasms per sex period, so it's not like I'm asking for a lot of effort from them.\n\nBasically what I'm asking is this: are men lying when they say they want sex constantly, or is there something wrong with me? I know I'm not a sex addict (although I have attended meetings) because I don't sleep around and I'm not willing to do *anything* for sex - I go on 4-6 month dry spells all of the time when I can't find someone I'm attracted to enough to sleep with.", "summary": "I love sex, but it seems like no guys want it as much as I do.  Are men lying about wanting it constantly, or is there something wrong with me?"}
{"id": "t3_2gws8t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [18 F] have been together for 4 and a half years, almost exclusively long distance. Recently I moved near her for college and she seems to want all of my free time.", "post": "We've been together since middle school, and through hell and back during our 4 long distance years, but now that I moved back to where she lives I don't feel like I can do things on my own without her being mad at me. \n\nShe works most week nights, so we have 3 or 4 days a week where we can see each other, so on nights where we aren't together we'll talk on the phone. This is usually awesome. I'll go outside and walk around and talk to her or just chill in my room. Lately she's become increasingly upset when I have to hang up and go to bed, or shower, really any reason I need to stop our phone conversation. I've started making up things I need to do just so I can relax before going to bed. \n\nOccasionally she'll call back later and I'll talk for 5 minutes and say goodnight, but if I don't answer she'll call like 15 times. It's starting to cut into my sleep and any other social interactions I have. If there's ever a day she's free and I have something scheduled I end up just feeling guilty. \n\nI love her to death, and I really do have a great time whenever I'm with her, but when I don't want to talk or I'm busy I don't feel like I can tell her that I'm being smothered or that I just need some alone time without really hurting her feelings.", "summary": "Basically, if she could spend every waking hour with me, she would love to. I have school and other friends I like to spend time with."}
{"id": "t3_hmpx3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it right for a coach to pull someone out of a championship?", "post": "Hi folks! So here's the situation: My brother was going to participate in a championship meet in his high school for a 4-man relay team, but had the coach replace him for someone else. Now the thing is, the other kid was late an hour from when he was supposed to meet the team. My brother inquired about why he got pulled from the race, and the coach said it's because the other kid has a faster time.\n\nNow does that really send the right message for a team? \"I can show up anytime I want because I have a faster time then all of you.\"? Shouldn't discipline and team respect be precedented over time?\n\nMy brother is really upset about this and I wanna know Reddit's opinion on this.", "summary": "Brother got pulled out of a championship just because the other kid who was faster showed up--though was late. Is that right or fucked up?"}
{"id": "t3_14cl3b", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU and got shit on while trying to get laid.", "post": "I was on Grindr, looking for some fun (I know, but still). This really hot guy messaged me and told me that he was alone on his birthday (that day). I said I'd come to join him and watch TV or whatever. When I noticed that none of the pictures had his legs in them, I didn't think too much of it. I walk into his dorm complex, knock on his door, and he answers. He had huge leg braces on, was using a cane, and was talking kind of funny. I didn't think too much of it - I have a friend who is disabled and still efficiently sexually active. We lay down on the futon, talk a little bit, watch some South Park, and things get really heated. Clothes are flying everywhere and things are going swimmingly. I lift his legs above my head and rest them on my shoulders, lean in, and kiss his lips. (I had to clarify.) Suddenly, I hear this \"foop\" kinda sound and feel something warm on my legs.\nI look down.\n\nIt's shit.\nA lot of shit.\nNot just like a little slimy thing, but like a fucking volcano erupted out of his ass and onto my thighs and dick. \n\nI shrieked and flipped out. I jumped off of the futon, sending shit in every direction possible, although none got on my clothing. Luckily, the room had a personal bathroom. I ran in and locked the door. I gathered up as much toilet paper as humanly possible and tried to wipe as much of it off as I could. I hopped in the shower, scrubbed the goddamn shit out of my legs and genital area, and left promptly.\n\nHe texted me later that night to apologize, telling me that this isn't the first time something similar had happened.\nI would have loved a forewarning.", "summary": "I hooked up with a disabled guy who took a massive dump on my dick and upper thighs and now I kinda feel like a douche for handling it the way I did."}
{"id": "t3_3y1gvd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [46 F] with my MIL [73F] planned to stay over the holidays but her house is SO filthy I want to leave", "post": "My husbands mother is in her early 70's, severely obese and has been babied by her parents and friends her whole life. She is extremely spoiled and self centred.\n\nHer personal hygiene is so bad, she can't wipe her own ass nor bath properly because she is too overweight to reach her own bottom and other body parts that need washing.\n\nWe flew in yesterday to stay for the holidays and when she opened the door we were all overwhelmed with a mix of the odour from her body, excessive dust and other horrible smells that I was shocked and didn't know what to say, so I said nothing.\n\nI opened the window of the bedroom we are staying in so I could breath, but woke up with a headache and my nose was full of grey and black bits of dust or whatever is in the air.\n\nMy youngest daughter said she was having trouble breathing, and I assume this was due to the amount of dust in the air.\n\nIt is very clear that my MIL never cleans her apartment.  The toilet had a black in it below the water line, and shit all over the seat on both sides.  \n\nThe floors are so dirty I don't want to take my shoes off.  There are cobwebs everywhere and dust all over her books and trinkets (she is a hoarder although not overly extreme compared to those hoarding shows on television).\n\nAbout an hour after waking I told my husband we had to find an alternate place to stay because I wasn't spending my vacation time cleaning someone else's filth, and clearly it wasn't healthy for us to stay with his mom.\n\nAlternately, I suggested he ask his mom if she is prepared to split the cost of a cleaning company to come in if they can asap (may be difficult so close to Christmas).\n\nI am pissed anyone could expect a family member to live in this filth.  Had I known she was so filthy dirty I would never have bothered to travel here. After paying for flights over the holidays I'm afraid of the cost of a hotel for two weeks :(", "summary": "Staying at MIL's with young kids, house is filthy dirty, we are getting sick, wondering what the best solution is."}
{"id": "t3_4eyayf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my bf [22M/F] 1 year, won't like my facebook pictures", "post": "Hi everyone, **I know that this is immature and petty** but I've been getting upset at my BF for never liking my facebook/instagram posts or photos while he does for other girls. \n\nI wouldn't mind at all if he didn't like or comment on anyone else's stuff, or even just his close friends. \n\nI've talked to him about it and all he said that he wouldn't and called me immature :(\n\nAny advice? What should I do to get over these negative feelings?! I feel dumb getting upset about these stupid social media things but I do feel jelous and upset :(", "summary": "I feel dumb getting upset about these stupid social media things but I do feel jelous and upset when my BF likes other girls' posts but not mine"}
{"id": "t3_4fnlux", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28M] with my girlfriend [24F] of 1.5 years; I love her, yet I'm extremely attracted to other women.", "post": "I love my girlfriend, she's great. Highly attractive, loving, very affectionate, heart-in-the-right-place - all of that stuff. \n\nI'm thinking about asking her to move in with me because we spend most of our time together and she's pretty much all the time at my place anyway.\n\nI should also mention I'm very well off while she is sort of still struggling (yet independent). So that may play a part in her being so attached to me. Although she never said or indicated that.\n\nFor some reason, I feel *extremely* sexually attracted to other women. Different women, particularly older (40-50), or just simply different in looks. It's not that I would want to have a relationship with them, I just have a strong urge to plow them.\n\nHow normal is this? And how should I handle it? I don't want to break up with my GF for meaningless sex with other women, who I will forget after a couple of days. Netiher do I like the idea of cheating. I have strong feelings for her. But it's just these strong urges...\n\nCould I be addicted to sex? What do you think? I don't think this urges are going away anytime soon.", "summary": "I (28/M) have strong feelings for my [24/F] GF, yet I'm ridiculosly sexually attacted to other women. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2n7d7v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my Girlfriend [25 F] of 3 weeks, when is an appropriate time to tell her I love her?", "post": "I know it's been a very short amount of time we've been in a relationship but in that time, we have hung out 4-5 times a week and been in more or less constant txt communication. We have pretty much everything in common, have similar goals, both want to settle down and start a family and just seem to be perfect for each other. \n\nWe slept together for the first time on Saturday night which was amazing, and I feel like I am in love with her. I don't want to say it too early though and scare her away incase she doesn't yet feel the same or wants to wait a little while (which would be understandable). \n\nWhen is an appropriate time to declare this?", "summary": "Been in a relationship with pretty much the female version of myself for 3 weeks and wondering when I can tell her I love her."}
{"id": "t3_2dhw30", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Someone just died in the house we're purchasing", "post": "Sorry in advance for any bad grammar or typos, using my phone.\n\nMy wife and I are in the process of buying a house (and are currently under contract). The house was rebuilt brand new within the past few years, and we knew we just had to have it when we saw it. The process has been relatively painless up to this point, including the resolution of several things from the home inspection process.\n\nFast forward to yesterday: law office sends over a correspondence letting us know that one of the sellers has died, but the remaining spouse still intends to move forward with the sale. Instant remorse and sorrow set in; despite hardly knowing the person. Then my wife brings up a valid point: what if the person died in the house? Will we still be comfortable to move forward ourselves, given that knowledge? I dismissed this, figuring hey the sellers are young, it probably was an accident of some sort (not trying to sound insensitive here, just trying to get my point across).\n\nI spoke to our lawyer last night, and basically was told that we are in a binding contract, and (barring a homicide or wrongful death in the house of sorts) would need to move forward so long as the seller wishes to move forward. Outside of this, we would need to involve a litigator, and that will create a huge headache I an sure.\n\nNow, we just found out that the seller did indeed die in the house (suddenly).\n\nI don't know how to feel or what to think. Maybe we're overreacting? My wife is more disturbed over the situation then I am, but I still feel unrest. Any and all advice or constructive criticism is welcome. Are we right to feel this way? Or should we just try to brush it under the rug, so to speak?", "summary": "OP is buying a house, one of the sellers suddenly dies in said house, now OP is hesitant in completing the house purchase."}
{"id": "t3_32l0zf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU Today I f'd up by dressing nice.", "post": "So I wasn't making really good money at my last job.  My wife and I decide to survive on her salary and I could go back to school for my masters degree.  This was two years ago.  \n\nThe other day I was feeling sluggish and unmotivated.  So I take a break from my work and go jump in the shower.  I trim the beard, and take care of my nails.  Put on some decent clothes so I feel like a human again.  I decide to take a walk to the corner and buy a gatorade to get some fresh air.  Then I head back home to get back to work.  \n\nA few hours of homework later my wife comes home.  The usual exchange, hello honey, how was your day.\n\nShe stops and looks at me.  \"What's going on?  I thought you said you were working today?\"\n\nThis turned into the most confused almost argument ever.  Finally she says, \"Why aren't you in your pajamas?\"\n\nSo after 2 years of Grad school, I guess my wife assumes I'll be in my pajamas when she comes home from work.", "summary": "After 2 years of Grad school, my wife assumes that I will look like a mess when she gets home from work.  I got dressed up one day and freaked her out."}
{"id": "t3_1s95pb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my very close friend [22 F] 3 months, secretive texting when we're together", "post": "Ive been talking to this girl for about 3 months now, recently we've gotten closer and we're pretty much dating but she doesn't want to commit to a relationship yet as she just got out of a long bad one and has a lot going on in her life at the moment\n\nWe hang out and talk quite often and we always have a good time and she usually gives me a hug or a kiss when we go our ways at the end of the night. \n\nThe other night we were at a theater and before the show started her mother was texting her a lot about christmas presents and our mutual friend was also texting her. She had her phone in plain sight and was even telling me a little about the conversations. She then snapchated a picture of the show and showed me it before she sent it off. She then got one back of a guy with no shirt on and she instantly hid her phone and started texting a lot.\n\nMind you this is in a dark theater so it was pretty easy to see whenever she got a message and against my better judgement I glanced at her phone and saw it was guys name she was texting. She was also sending him massive walls of text as well.\n\nAfter that she just seemed disinterested in everything except for her phone, and barely spoke to me. I asked if that was her mom still texting her and she said \"yeah and (our friends name)\" On the way back she barely said a word and kept texting and I asked her if everything was alright she said yeah, she just has a lot going on right now, but its all good things.\n\nShould I be worried about this? Shes usually very straight forward and very talkative. I think part of my problem is that its been a while since Ive been in a relationship and I had a bit of jealousy creep up on me. I also realize we're not technically together, Ive just never seen her do this before", "summary": "Girl I am kind of dating received a snapchat from a shirtless guy and proceeded to text him the whole night when we were together, not sure if I should be worried about it or not"}
{"id": "t3_emquc", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Reddit, I have a sleep disorder that keeps me from falling asleep before dawn/ waking up before 2 PM.  Any advice?  Otherwise, where can I get a decent night shift job?", "post": "It's called Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome (DSPS).  It's like permanent jet lag, and I hate it sooo much.  I've tried everything to fix it: sleeping pills at midnight (don't work, just fall into a weird pseudo-sleep state where I have all kinds of random daydreams), try waking up early (literally run at about 40-60% of full functionality, have trouble with abstract concepts and basic math, functionally retarded), I've even stayed up for the entire night, next day and STILL had trouble falling asleep the next night.  I've managed to maintain decent grades in all my classes (senior year at WVU currently), but I always get B's or C's in any class before 2 PM.  I doubt my drinking habit helps things.", "summary": "I have a sleep schedule that doesn't fit the 9-5 prototype, I am gonna either need a quick fix, or a night shift job in May."}
{"id": "t3_28uhvj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23M] have developed a crush on my friend's wife's sister [17F] and don't know what to do.", "post": "My best friend that I've known for most of my life got married yesterday and I was his best man. His wife's sister was the maid of honor. Just to give you an idea of the age range of everyone, the bride and groom are both 24.\n\nAnyway, I live a state over from all of them so I visited for all of last week. Since most of the time was spent doing last minute wedding prep, I ended up spending a lot of time with the maid of honor. I had met her a few times before this past week, but this was the first time we spent any substantial time together. \n\nLong story short, some innocent flirting took place and now I can't stop thinking about her. It's been 3 years since my last relationship and I haven't even had feelings for anyone since then. A few things weird me out about this situation/tell me this isn't and shouldn't be going anywhere:\n\n1. The age difference. I've graduated from college and she hasn't even started her senior year of high school.\n\n2. She has a semi-serious boyfriend (as serious as you can be in high school, I guess). I've never met him.\n\n3. This all hits to close to home. I've started considering the long-term when it comes to relationships because a lot of my friends are starting to get engaged or married, and dating my best friend's wife's sister just seems weird to me.\n\nDespite all that, I can't deny that I like her. It could partially be because I'm lonely or haven't had romantic interaction in 3 years, but regardless, the feelings are there. Cutting off contact won't really work either since she'll likely be around some or most of the time when I go visit my friend. Also, I've gotten pretty friendly with their family as a whole and I wouldn't want to get on their bad side.\n\nAfter writing this, I'm not really sure what advice I'm looking for. I guess I'm looking for advice on how to stop thinking about her in a romantic context. Or maybe I just needed to get this off my chest.", "summary": "I have a crush on my friend's wife's sister who is much younger than me and I'm not sure how to get over it."}
{"id": "t3_1i5p16", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "(32/f) Frustrated with husband's (32/m) job and lack of motivation.", "post": "My husband and I have been together for 10 years, married for 2.  I love him, he's a good person, he treats me well, but I hate his line of work.  He works in sales (retail essentially) and constantly works nights, every weekend, and basically has no potential to move up.\n\nHe started working this job right before he went to school, finished school, and then went right back to exactly the same job as before, taking the whole time about how great his future jobs would be and how he was going to start looking for something else right away, ect, ect, ect. It's been 5 years.  He still talks about getting a different job and moving into a career where he can move up and have a good future, and actually use his education he paid so much for.  \n\nBut he does nothing to make this happen.  \n\nIt's getting really frustrating.  I've started going on weekend trips without him, planning things without him because I know he can't take holidays, and I don't even believe he's going to try and find something better. The economy can not be blamed for this, we live in a place with tons of very good high paying jobs, even for people without formal eduation.\n\nI've been supportive, I've offered to help, I've given him endless suggestions, introduced him to contacts, but he does nothing.  I don't know what to do.", "summary": "Husband has been working dead end job for years, despite constantly talking about looking for something better, and despite having an education, and despite the fact that we live in a place that has many many jobs and a great economy."}
{"id": "t3_3ssick", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] want to look into Welding/Other Trade Jobs but I know my parents [54F and 56M] will not approve.", "post": "All my life I have wanted a \"hands on job\". I hate the idea of a desk job, I hate going to university looking at a career I am only vaguely interested in. However jobs like welding and auto repair are becoming fields that need younger blood. I am almost done with my first semester at University and my current major is Social Work. I'm not too excited and I'm unmotivated to put the effort in. University is over priced and I'm not happy. That being said it's free to me. My scholarship covers tuition and all my folks have to pay is for books and car maintenance. My job: is student who will have a BS in Social Work by 2020. Sigh. There are local trade schools near me. Much closer than the University I attend. I want to search around maybe during winter break for Welding programs but I know my parents will not approve at all. They are hell bent on the idea that the only living is one with a college degree. But I'm not happy. Should I look around and not tell them or should I be upfront and risk them actively trying to stop me?", "summary": "I, a tomboy, wants to look into Trade Schools but am currently at Uni on my parents dime and I'm unhappy with my future outlook."}
{"id": "t3_y3wyb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I help my teenage boyfriend when he is depressed?", "post": "Some background: My boyfriend and I grew up together and he has liked me for pretty much his whole life. I am sixteen and he is fifteen. We were best friends before I moved away and then we realized we liked each other. We've been dating long distance for the past seven months and have been getting along great. We don't argue and we resolve things logically.  I just got back from visiting him for the first time in the whole relationship and it was great (though very difficult to say goodbye). \n\nSituation: My boyfriend is constantly depressed nd I don't know how to help him. I try to cheer him up and talking to him usually helps him, but when I am not around, he falls into deep funks. Sometimes he can even get into one in the middle of a conversation. I really care about him and I know he feels the same way. I know it's nothing I'm doing. I'm about to start a very hard year at school this year, so he anticipates that our relationship won't be the same as it used to be. I think this may be the reason he has been so depressed lately.\nWhat are some ways I can cheer him up and remind him, even though we may not be talking all the time, that I care about him?", "summary": "How do you let your depressed boyfriend know you care when you're in a long distance relationship and can't talk all the time?"}
{"id": "t3_2fov5c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(f30) was giving my bf(34) a blowjob, while he was looking at porn.", "post": "Exactly what the title says, but I was under the covers and when I came up he was on his phone. I asked him what he was looking at and he said it was his flipboard app. Well, I saw the reflection of red tube porn in his glasses. I felt a little hurt that he lied and the fact that I wasn't enough to get him going with my blowjob alone. I don't know, maybe I'm overly sensitive, but I feel a bit bummed. I don't care if he looks at porn, but while I'm going down on him and he's trying to look at porn on the side? It kind of hurts my feelings. Am I being too sensitive? I don't even know what to say.", "summary": "boyfriend was looking at porn on the sly while I was going down on him. I feel like I'm not enough to get him going."}
{"id": "t3_4kgnfk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] am questioning if my best/only friend [18M] is actually my friend at all.", "post": "I have know him for ~11 years. We used to hang out all the time. Video games, metal etc. We shared a lot of interests. But then he found more friends.\n\nWe spent less and less time together. Nowadays we only see each other in school. Every now and then we skype and vidya, and it's fun.\n\nHe doesn't care about my things though. Anytime i am not just listening to him in a conversation, and try to talk about something i'd like to, he goes \"k\", and keeps going like i never said anything. I also seem to be the second choice whenever someone else is available.\n\nI don't fucking know anymore. He is the only person outside of my family that wants to spend any time with me, but i don't know if he is a friend at all.", "summary": "Friend doesn't care to talk about my interests, and only ever spends time with me when nobody else is available. Don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2t2ss6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] got a little freaky with my friend [22 F] and don't know what to do now.", "post": "I have a friend I met in a hobby group, and I've known her for the past 5 months. We weren't super close or anything, but our hobby group became a bit tight knit near the end of the fall semester and we started hanging out more, like going for drinks and dancing. Sometimes when we danced she would get very close to me, but I was very recently broken up so I wasn't in the mood to be pursuing another relationship so quick. \n\nOn the weekend I held a small party at my place, and people got very drunk. By the end most people left, and she lived far so she crashed at my place. We were cuddling outside while people were indoors, and after they left we started to dance, which then lead to making out, and she got topless, but it didn't progress past that. We also slept in the same bed that night. Basically, I don't know what happens now since I've always been pretty quiet and awkward and never in this situation. She's attractive, but she's not my type, plus my last relationship was great but ended due to long distance and it still stings. Do I contact my friend to talk about it, or do we ignore and pretend it never happened? Haven't talked except me asking one text if she was going to this event on campus.", "summary": "Made out with a friend, both drunk, and haven't had any contact with her since, unsure of what to do."}
{"id": "t3_17vbi4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "After 10 years of marriage,my(37M) Wife(33F) changes mind on Children. No idea what to do next.", "post": "First off, I'd love to hear from people that have already been through this as I'm sure it isn't too uncommon.\n\nMy wife (33F) and I (37M) have been married for 10 years and together for 12.  From the night we met I expressed that I wanted children and had since the time I was about 6.  \n\nWe have been hoping to get pregnant over the last few years and trying hard with the help of Clomid the past year (although the clomid was only the last 3 months). \n\nOver the past month she has been very vocal about how much having kids will ruin her life, body, etc.  Trying to get pregnant is stressful and I, mistakenly wrote it off as frustration.\n\nAfter this last round of medication, we did not get pregnant.  Afterward she finally admitted that she did not want kids and was only doing it for me.  Our original plan was to try for our own and if that failed pursue adoption.\n\nNow, she wants adoption off the table as she has accepted the fact she does not want to be a mother at all.\n\nI'm not sure what to do.  I love my wife, but not having kids at all is devastating to me.\n\nSo, divorce came up in conversation, but here are my thoughts on that.  One, I love her and see not other reason for divorce.  How could I live with myself for leaving her just because of something I want?  Two, I'm 37...Really what are the odds of finding another woman that would want to get with me and have children sometime before I'm 45?  And three, arrrg what the hell...really??\n\nAnd, before anyone says it...Yes, I know kids can be tough.  They turn into teenagers and are a giant money sink.  They may become horrible people that end up in prison and escape to try and blow up Gotham.  But, the opposite is also a possibility... I work with kids and interact with dozens or more per day.  I know what they're like...", "summary": "Wife no longer wants anything to do with children so adoption off the table and I don't know how to deal with it"}
{"id": "t3_eqvl4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Lawyers of Reddit or anyone who has experience with the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) I would like some input.", "post": "I have a quick question regarding my new apartment that I moved into about 7 months ago but I'll give a quick back story first.  The apartment in which I currently am living in is ADA accessible.  For those unfamiliar it is meant for people who are physically disabled having a larger bedroom, a larger bathroom with a support bar along with wall, lowered shelves, light switches, sinks, and cupboards with doors removed for easier access to those in wheelchairs.  It is the ground floor apartment, however it still has a half-flight of stairs in order to get to the front door from the parking lot/walkway.  There is a back door, but it is a sliding glass door leading to a concrete patio and a small concrete ramp for wheelchair access.  And here is lies the problem, the sliding glass door cannot be locked from the outside.\n\nThis is what got me thinking, is something like this legal where a person who is physically disabled is unable to secure their home?  I am not in any way disabled and is probably why I have not thought about it until recently, but it still makes me wonder if something like this is illegal.  And to my knowledge this apartment complex has several other ADA accessible apartments for rent along with another complex built the same as mine.  I have talked to a friend of mine who is a private contractor and he told me that it is illegal, however he is not much of a legal authority so I thought I would ask as help for my own research.", "summary": "Front door to apartment is the only way to secure the apartment but has a flight of stairs, back door has a ramp but no lock on the outside.  Is this legal?"}
{"id": "t3_1zxek9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] with my boyfriend [17 M] of 3 years, broke up with me until he thinks I can make him happy", "post": "My boyfriend (we'll call him T) and I have always both struggled a lot with depression, me probably more than him. Lately, it has been even worse for me and it was taking a huge toll on him and our relationship, because I would always talk about how depressed I was (I know, I know, I was awful), and I was pretty mean. \n\nSo, T has been miserable for a while because of it so he broke up with me yesterday. But, he said he would definitely want to get back together if he felt I could make him happy. He wants me to do that by acting happy and showing that I've changed I guess. Obviously it's difficult because I'm pretty pained from the break up. \n\nSo far, I've put in my two weeks for a job that made me extremely depressed and very complainy to focus on making myself happy along with the relationship. And since we're currently \"friends\" I've been doing my best to be very nice to him, but since the break up WAS only yesterday I've sort of broken down a couple of times, but I'm getting better at staying strong. \n\nI am going to see T on Monday, what should I do to show him I'm really willing to put in an effort, and that things will be different? I'm willing to do anything tbh.", "summary": "Bf dumped me because I'm too depressing but said we could get back together if I show him I can be happier and more pleasant- how do I do this?"}
{"id": "t3_3qbx5q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my wife [28 F] of 2.5 years, sex life is dying...", "post": "My wife and I may or may not have been meant to be. Perhaps we'll never know. We dated for 2 years in college and shortly after graduating, found out we had a bun in the oven. Pregnancy was rough on both of us, and she had some depression issues during and after. We got married about 6 months before our son was born. And that was when our sex life died.\n\nFast forward 2 years, I still have the same libido I had in college. If there's an opportunity to get some, I take it (only with the wife). My wife on the other hand is either too busy, too tired, or just doesn't feel like it. And when she does feel like it, its never for me, it just what is good for her, with no concession for my wants and preferences. It's sex, so I don't turn it down. \n\nI take good care of myself as she does, I'm not ugly and neither is she, and I've been faithful since we started dating. I've recently given up on the whole surprise flowers, spontaneous dates, small gifts, etc. as they very rarely produce anything other than a \"thank you\". \n\nWhat can I do to better our sex life, both in frequency and variety?", "summary": "How can a loyal, good-lookin horndog get his wife to spice it up a bit without being put in the doghouse?"}
{"id": "t3_2y6mh0", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "A colossal NSV", "post": "Some background information - I am a 25 year old woman. I currently weigh around 235lbs. My previous high weight was 306lbs, and this time last year I had gotten down to 184lbs. I had a surgery last spring, fell into a depression, ate literally nothing but junk food for a year, and gained half of my lost weight back. \n\n30 days ago, I got fed up with myself and decided to get my shit together. I dusted off my MFP account and my kitchen scale, started logging everything I ate, and haven't touched fast food or soda since. \n\nNow, one thing I haven't mentioned yet is that I am a dialysis patient. I got a rare autoimmune disease when I was 19 and almost died. I had to drop out of university and move back across the country to live with my parents. Lots of crazy shit has happened since then, and I will be on dialysis for the rest of my life. Part of managing this is going to doctor appointments in the local peritoneal dialysis clinic every three months. They do bloodwork, you meet with a dietician, you meet with a pharmacist, they check blood pressures and things, and you meet with a doctor. Takes about three hours. \n\nMy bloodwork has traditionally been shitty. My phosphorus, calcium, potassium levels have been all over the place. I was on 10 pills a day to manage my calcium alone. \n\nNow, on to the actual point of this post. \n\nAt my clinic appointment yesterday, I was informed that ALL of my bloodwork fell in the normal range. \n\nALL of it. \n\nI've been taken off more than 50% of my medications because I don't need them anymore. \n\nThe dietician/nutritionist (is there a difference? i don't know) was astonished. She said she was proud of me for making such a significant change through my diet alone. The doctor was impressed too, which really meant a lot to me because she's a very strict, no-nonsense type. She isn't the type to say something just to make someone feel better. \n\nAnyway,", "summary": "I went from 10 different kinds of pills + one weekly injection to manage my health, down to two kinds of pills + one weekly injection. plus my dialysis itself, of course, but that's never going to go away."}
{"id": "t3_145rw4", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Hey :) 22 (f) here, wants to lose 80 pounds :(", "post": "I am a twenty two years old who has tried all sort of ways to lose weight, going from starving myself , or eating 6 meals a day but nothing changed. \nI've been overweight like since ever.\n\nI tried aerobics recently but stopped quickly because i was too ashamed of my size. I am around 110kilo, 168cm and i dont have my menses regularly. I have symtoms of pcos, facial hair and the shit but none of the tests that i did turned out positive. \n\nI recently got into a LDR., (after like 4-5 years) (i dont date because i am ashamed of how i look like ) and my SO mentioned that we should both lose weight before he gets back to the country, so that we could have more fun together and i do agree with him. I feel tired and so lazy most of the time. \nI want to try anything that would make me feel comfortable and healthier. \n\nPls , post your before/after pics, anything that you give me motivation. How much do you think it's possible for me to lose in 6 months, realistically? For women mostly, what are the things that worked for you?", "summary": "obese girl wants to get back in shape, and feel beautiful for the first time of her life. pls help."}
{"id": "t3_1g857z", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (22 F) have no idea how to read this guy (23 M) who I started talking to recently. Help!", "post": "Long-time lurker here.\n\nOkay, so I'm 22 (F) and just started talking to this guy who is 23. While I'm not particularly interested in him, I'm rather confused about his behaviors. Most days, he texts me so much that I turn off my phone from irritation and other days he sends me one or two texts. We've been talking for about three weeks and I have no idea how to react to him.\n\n The day after I met him, he told me about his hometown and suggested I go visit it to see some local parade and basically told me his life story, insecurities and dreams for his future. I told him next to nothing about myself, but I didn't lead on that he was creeping me out a little. \n\nLately, I haven't been really responding because I've been busy, so he's stopped texting me as much (thank god). Well, today, out of nowhere, he tells me this elaborate (a little unbelievable) story about how he met some awesome girl and got her number. \n\n Does this mean he's lost interest and I can tell him that I'm not interested too without seeming cruel or is he trying to make me jealous? I've never had someone do this to me before.\n\nFYI, I'm not sure if he knows I'm wary of him.", "summary": "This guy is confusing as hell and I want to know he is (hopefully) interested in some other girl or if I have to be the villain and tell him that I don't feel the same way."}
{"id": "t3_3c0m6p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my unofficial gf [20 F] 3 months, transferring to another college 1 hour away, we both have a heavy work load. Really want this, but she's thinking logically for the both of us? idk what to do?", "post": "She's super smart and transferring to one of the best schools in the world.\n\nI'm not stupid but she's on another level. This girl is everything I could ever want. Dated a lot but never had a real relationship.\nShe wants me to focus on transferring, which I am. I'll have to take two of the highest Math Classes, entire physics, and advanced programming in c++ & java.\n\nSeeing her won't be much of an issue. Probably we get to see her 3 weekends a month at the most. Maybe one weekend at the least.\nI don't know how to tell her what she means. She said she'll decide towards the end of august. I want an answer now, so I can get over her sooner.", "summary": "Unofficial Gf, only girl I've ever truly liked. She's thinking logically for the both of us. Both of us have lots of school work. idk how to convince her to?"}
{"id": "t3_3w67qa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my friend [17 F] of 1 tear are thinking of becoming friends with benefits. But I am having some doubts.", "post": "My friend (female), who is a 17 year old and not a virgin, and I, a 17 year old male who is a virgin decided to be friends with benefits. But my female friend is not good looking and doesn't have a very good body. But I wasn't too sure of what to do. I indirectly then asked my friends by creating scenarios with some different girls of 'would you rather' to get their opinions, and they said they would, but when i asked them about the girl I was going to be friends with benefits with they hesitated and/or said no.  It is worth noting that I think I can do better. But I don't see any options becoming available anytime soon. However, if I be friends with benefits with the girl, no one will find out. I am currently in high school and will be graduating in May of 2016. I also REALLY dont want to go to college as a virgin so I will be ready (both physically and mentally) to anything (sexually) thrown at me.", "summary": "Should I (a 17 year old virgin) be friends with benefits with someone that isn't very good looking and doesn't have good body and I know I can do better?"}
{"id": "t3_arce4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I mange this Job", "post": "I Work at this small Polish restaurant, when I was first employed i was a dish washer, then I got promoted to bus boy and then almost waiter but then that failed. Our dishwasher recently quit to go to college and I am not stuck with doing the dishes 3~4 times a week. This is not your normal dishes. I have to do dishes, easy,Prep food, and that's all I did when I first started to work there but now I clean the grease hood, wipe down every surface and do all the busboy jobs as well every night. I'm only 15 and it I end up leaving work around 1:00 a.m. in the morning every school night. How can I help myself get through all the work?", "summary": "Job sucks and I work for very long hours for a high schooler, need method to make job easier, or less of a pain."}
{"id": "t3_1gr5e4", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/m] Having trust issues with [22/f] gf", "post": "Bit of background... \n\nI have been with my gf coming on for a year and a half and we get on very well, have a lot of the same taste's and everything seems to be going very well.In fact it is by far the best of the four relationships I have had. \n\nBut obviously I would not be posting here if that was everything. When she drinks she can act rather flirty towards other men, in front of me. This doesn't bother me so much as I appreciate that she is just having fun and I am confident enough in our relationship to not feel threatened by a bit of friendliness at a bar. \n\nHowever this changes at music festivals, which she goes to a lot of, starting last year at a Download (a UK metal festival). Here she woke up drunk and went straight outside our tent to some creepy looking bloke and asked if he would give her a drink if she flashed him, he obviously agreed and proceeded to motorboat her as i sat in my tent dumbfounded. Taking this as a drunk one off I swallowed my dignity and continued with life. \n\nNow go forward to the same festival this year, and she's drunk again. I come back to our camp site, after being separate that day to see different bands, and she's telling everyone that she flashed one of the singers and that another guy had grabbed her as she did. Her drunken antics that followed was basically getting grabby with everyone and once getting her tits out in my mates face when someone jokingly said to do it. \n\nI trust her completely when she is sober and when she is out drinking with me its nothing to worry about to much. However when at festivals with her mates she does not know when to stop drinking and it concerns me as I don't see her when she's out with her friends which is when she gets out of control.", "summary": "I know my gf would not cheat on me sober but she can't handle her drink and gets ridiculously wild when she does. "}
{"id": "t3_41bdpo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me(28/F) with my Bf(26/M) of seven years. Had an idea for his birthday and it turned into a party the excludes me.", "post": "My boyfriend LARPs. Which is Live Action Roleplay. For his party I had the idea to ask the girl who runs it if she could make a personal quest for him and at the end would be a chest with new Larp gear I plan on buying for him.\n\nWell the idea turned into a small larp event in her backyard for his birthday party. The problem is I don't larp. So I would have to most likely sit the party out. I really wanted to go since I haven't been to one of his parties in a few years. Last year I was recovering from back surgery and the other years I had work.\n\nShould I just ait this one out now and not go or is there a way to cancel the idea without coming acrossed as a jerk?", "summary": "Boyfriend larps. His birthday became a larp based party. I don't larp but want to be there on his birthday."}
{"id": "t3_29xvgx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my GF [30 F] are constantly arguing, is it time to call it quits?", "post": "My gf and I have been in a relationship for 2 years now (in love, thinking about a future together). The past 4 months we've been continuously arguing. Here's an example of her arguments:\n\n1. Started a fight because I interrupted her while talking (I don't often interrupt her)\n2. Told her I won't be able to make it an event at her work because of my work (she gets very upset and tells me that makes her not want to share her life with me)\n3. One time shell called me in the morning chatting, she said she just finished breakfast, so I joked by saying \"I'm proud of you! :)\"...She took it as an offense and sarcastic comments, even though I said I was joking\n4. If I don't text her during my 8am-5pm work hours, she gets upset saying that I wasn't thinking about here\n5. The other day she lied to me that she lost her phone, then the other day said that she was joking (to get my \"caring\" attention), so I got upset at her lying...then she gets upset at me for \"making a big deal out of it\"...\n....and many more...This is just a fraction of all the stuff that happens, all of the same calibre. It happens at least once every 72 hours. \n\nNot to mention:\n* she went through my phone 3 times before as well as my e-mail. \n\n* She created a fake OkCupid account to see if I'm still on that site (I'm not, since we met on it). \n\n* She occasionally looks at my exes facebook pages (one time I was using her laptop to check my facebook, and as I was typing facebook.com the Chrome auto-complete showed facebook URLs of my exes that she's not even friends with)", "summary": "When you girlfriend is constantly busting your balls for the tiniest problems, is it worth staying in the relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_12v6yz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I was brought to tears of anger because my boss wanted me to take photos at our Holiday Party. Reddit, what seemingly small things makes you instantly irrational?", "post": "I've been in love with photography since I was 12, went to school for it, and was a professional for a number of years before I decided to quit to better my quality of life (stopped taking photos for myself + only took photos for money = was miserable). I've been working as a creative director, specializing in video, for a corporation the past 8 months. \n\nOur company invites several hundred employees from across the country to our corporate headquarters for a yearly meeting and holiday party, at which time every employee get's a new bio photo. There's also a massive amount of photos taken at the party, and they usually hire a photographer for this. \n\nI had heard that a photographer hadn't been hired yet and asked my boss if the higher ups were expecting me to do the photos. I also mentioned that I really did not want to be responsible for this. \n\nToday I received an email chain where my boss basically suggested that I take the photos and that I could enjoy the party AND take hundreds of portraits and event photos. I was instantly furious and had to leave for an hour. \n\nI know my boss isn't aware of the amount of work something like this involves and probably thought it would just be easier to use me instead of hiring a photographer. Normally I'm a very balanced and understanding person, but anything involving a misunderstanding of photography sends me into a blind rage and all I can do is leave and cool down for a while.", "summary": "Boss requested I, an ex-photographer, spend our holiday party taking hundred of professional portraits and as well as the party's photos"}
{"id": "t3_39wc5s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28M] with my crush/ex [28F] 3 months on-off, she broke it off because of being scared?", "post": "So..A while a go me and the girl i was dating broke up, went NC, because she wasn't over ex and all that stuff.\nWe kept NC for six weeks till she contacted me again.\n\nA week ago she contacted me to hang out, and we did. Initially it was just friendly but we ended up sleeping together again, and the day after she confesses to me she's into me and she's falling for me all over again.\n\nWith that said, she mentions she's not sure if she's ready for a relationship so we decide to take things easy.\n\nFast forward a week, and she wants to call things off again because \"things are moving too fast and it feels like things are getting to close, and \"we don't really fit together\" while she repeatedly has been telling me how much she is into me. \n\nI feel like she's shitting bricks again and is getting out before things get to a point where they get serious for her ( she mentioned she can't help but think of a future with me, and that scares her)\n\nPeople of reddit, i don't believe she's cutting me out because she \"thinks we don't really fit together\" but because she's scared of things becoming too real, which is basically what she said.\n\nHow do i deal with this and how do i show her that there is nothing to be scared of?", "summary": "girl i dated twice now is scared of commitment and feels like things are getting too serious, doesn't want to take a step back but instead just want to stop things all together."}
{"id": "t3_3lvq2q", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "How can I eat healthily in college?", "post": "So long story short, I was mildly overweight before I began college, and although I don't have a scale to weigh myself on, I know that I have gained even more weight since I've been here (jeans are too tight, I went up a tshirt size, etc.) I want/need to lose roughly 15-30 pounds.\n\nI've been trying to eat healthy and exercise regularly, but it's so difficult in college. I have to eat lunch and dinner every day in our cafeteria, which is buffet style. They have lots of options like burgers, ice cream, and Chickfila, but very limited healthy foods (plus it's not helpful that I really, really hate salad). \n\nI have a minifridge and can go to the store to buy food, but of course I don't have much money. I buy fruits and veggies to snack on, but I can't afford to be buying lots of meals for myself to eat. Plus, I'm limited in my options since I can only cook things in a microwave.", "summary": "There are limited healthy options in my school's cafeteria, and I can't afford/can't cook many healthy options at \"home\" in my dorm. How can I eat healthy?"}
{"id": "t3_2y9e5k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF [22f] and I [24m] have had a rocky sex life and I feel like it's all my fault and need help.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been going out for 3 years now, and outside of the bedroom, we're a perfect match for each other, and we love each other very much. However in the bedroom,  things don't feel like such. (I also like to point out that this is my first relstionship). Minus a FEW good (and even great) moments in the past in regards to sex, there's been a lot of \"okay\"  to disappointing feelings that made sex a total guilt trip and frustrating experience. \n\nI feel as this is all my fault because I have a tendency to think/fall into this selfish bastard mindset that goes straight for the immediate sex and release, and then feel like a dick and horrible for doing so...which in turn, does get her to climax. Sex ends quickly too with my lack of self control in regards to cumming first. It's gotten to the point were she not only expects it to be a disappointment, but that she has felt less if not completely not sexy anymore in bed, and feels used. I keep on beating myself up for it and it's been a repeat issue for most of the relationship and I don't know what to do.", "summary": "This being my first relationship, I feel like my lack of experience and my selfishness in bed is ruining my girlfriend and I's sex life and possibly our relationship."}
{"id": "t3_qm8qy", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit. Last year I licensed an old backyard wrestling video to TruTv. After that, MTV took the clip from YouTube and has been airing it ever since. Why would one company need my permission, while the other one doesn't bother?", "post": "In high school, I was a backyard wrestler.  I posted a blooper video to Youtube.  TruTV contacted me to use it in a segment.  I signed a release, licensing the footage for the show. Then a few months ago, I wake up text messages from people who saw me on MTV's Ridiculousness. I was as surpised as they were.  It's on quite a lot.  I'm  just wondering - why would one network ask me for permission, while the other does not?  What's the legally of using footage from youtube on network TV etc? I'd assume it was under Fair Use.", "summary": "TruTV paid me to use my youtube video.  Then MTV used it without my consent. How can they do that? Why would TruTV ask me and MTV not? "}
{"id": "t3_1utprd", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "I'm losing weight really fast, but I'm also very scared.", "post": "I've managed to lose 8 lbs. in under TWO WEEKS which I am very proud of, but I fear that my weight loss streak will come to a stop very soon. So far I've been really good with diet, no cravings, no junk, no sugary foods, but I am afraid that I will get a sudden urge to pig out at a fast food place or some greasy buffet. I have not yet encountered an urge like this but since it has been a while I am scared that some stress will hit me in my life and an old habit that I had would come back and causing me to go out and eat junk. If I ever encounter craving what should I do?", "summary": "I haven't binged yet but I fear that I will have cravings very soon, how do I prevent from bingeing?"}
{"id": "t3_wetsm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Has anyone else here ever been completely pwnd by a girl? Lemme tell you what happened today...", "post": "So Im at work (service industry) and its a pretty slow part of the day and I'm chatting it up with my friend/enemy coworker. (A little back story: She's very funny and fun to be around but she is one of those girls who is perfectly aware of how attractive she is and tends to use this fact to her advantage. She turned me down some months ago, tbh she's way outta my league but whtvr, and she *knows* i think shes attractive and so she'll say things that could be taken sexually or just casually scratch her boob or something in front of me. Shes a shameless tease, and it drives me up the wall sometimes) So she's talking to me and she starts slowly leaning over the service counter 'reaching for a pen' while facing away from me. the effect of it was, once she managed to reach the pen,most of her torso was on the desk while her feet were on tip-toe and her ass pointed right at me, which of course was the point. So I say, \"That looks like a position you're used to assuming.\" And she gets off the counter and I expect her to be all mad, but she just looks at me with this hard-done-by expression and says \"Are you kidding? I haven't had a raise in years.\" It was such a perfect comeback I was just stunned. I'm terrible a comebacks, and I had nothin after that.", "summary": "I try to put down my co-worker for being a shameless tease and she comes back with a perfect quip causing me to go completely blank while she smirked victoriously."}
{"id": "t3_emt0b", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I thought we were together, but guess we're not.", "post": "Can't believe I'm here again asking for advice..\n\nSo to make a (very) long story short: been v. good friends with a guy for 6 years, always a bit flirty. Both early 30s. Few months ago he admitted to having liked me all along, we didn't get together then, but after thinking about him more and more, and me realizing a few things, we got together last month. Background story is actually [here] for anyone interested.\n\nWe never had a talk about what was happening, or where this was going, I just assumed we were going to start getting closer, and things would naturally move forward. Unfortunately, I don't live in the same city as him right now, and the distance situation wasn't clarified at all, so we naturally went back to the normal way and amount of communicating from when we were just friends. Which means we talk about 4 times a week, sometimes every day, but there's never any \"i miss you\" or any conversation that wouldn't take place if we were just friends. It's 100% exactly as it was before we ever got together.\n\nNow cue to today. For years we have always spent new years' eve with these friends who live abroad, and this year the plan was the same. I didn't even think much about it, I just booked my flight as usual, assuming he was too and we were just going to meet there. Well he just told me he's not going, he's been promoted in work and is stressed out and traveling was \"just going to be more stress\"... Wtf? \n\nI said I was looking forward to spending time with him, and he just replied \"you're sweet\". And that was that.\n\nNow, I know we don't have an actual relationship and that means I can't really push and ask him about it without sounding crazy. But I'm sad, does this mean there's nothing going on? We were only together a couple of weekends in the last month, so in normal circumstances that would be totally too soon to be asking where I stand, which is why I'd really feel silly if I had to be forcing that conversation.\n\nSo, RA: thoughts?", "summary": "Guy friend says he likes me. I like him. We get together and now he acts as we're only just friends again."}
{"id": "t3_2fdmkg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 F] haven't heard from guy I'm dating [26 M] in over a day, we usually text every day and I'm concerned?", "post": "I'm a little concerned that the guy I've been seeing for about a month now hasn't gotten in touch with me since Monday evening. We've been on six dates now and things seemed to be progressing quite well. We had our sixth date Sunday evening, I spent the night at his and we had a lot of fun (though not sex yet, though i did oral on him for the first time), then the next day he basically wanted me to stay and hang out with him until 4 o clock in the afternoon. That was all on his part - he kind of wanted to just hang and cuddle and watch TV with me all day. And he made me brunch which was sweet. He walked me to the subway and asked me to text him when I got home. I did and we chatted for a bit, I sent the last text and he didn't respond. Cut to now Wednesday afternoon and I haven't heard from him at all. I would initiate but as I sent the last text Monday night and initiated last time I don't want to come off as pushy. We normally talk every day, with one of us usually taking the lead when the other one hasn't the day before. Things have gotten pretty comfortable, he calls me babe now, he is comfortable showing affection to me in front of his buddies, it just seems he has dropped off the radar completely since Monday. Also, we normally make plans for our next date by now and there's been no follow up. Since I picked the last date I feel like I should give this responsibility to him and don't want to be pushy or over eager. When should I be worried if I don't hear from him?", "summary": "Regularly have daily texting contact with guy I'm seeing but haven't heard anything from him in nearly 48 hours - I'm worried he has lost interest, is this a bad sign?"}
{"id": "t3_1iwhcv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [29f] bring it up that my boyfriend [33m] of three months wants to spend evenings alone?", "post": "Okay, so I've been with my bf for three months, and most of the time, it's great. We get along together splendidly, really enjoy each other's company, and the sex is just great.\n\nThe thing is, I'm getting really self-conscious about suggesting spending evenings alone when we're both really tired because he usually reclines. Today is a great example. We both had a long day at work, plus we didn't really sleep well last night because of the heat... So we were just IMing about what we would do tonight, he said he wanted to stay home so I suggested I'd come over. Just to watch a movie or something. The last time we did this, he said two or three times \"Why don't we do this every night?\" But, he said he just wanted to relax, plan his holiday and pursue his hobby (Sorry if that's not the right expression, English is my second language).\n\nThis would be fine if this was the first time it happened, but it's not. Usually, when I say \"let's just spend the night at home\" because we both don't want to go out, he declines it in like 75%. Which made me kind of stop wanting to suggest this. Rejection sucks. \n\nThe thing is, I don't know if I should bring it up. He's normally an amazing boyfriend, treats me way better than the guys I dated before him, constantly says he loves me and I feel I'd be unfair to make this allegation when he's so great in every other way. Plus, I'm afraid he'd beat himself up about it, which is something I don't want him to.\n\n(I should probably add that it's not that we don't spend time alone together, it's just when he's tired he can't seem to get himself to see me, I guess)\n\nSo, any advice would be appreciated, thanks!", "summary": "Boyfriend doesn't want to see me when he's tired, makes me feel self-conscious, should I bring it up or let it slip because he treats me great in every other way?"}
{"id": "t3_3ioqq5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [21f] thinking about asking him [26M] to make it official.", "post": "In June I met a guy on OkCupid. We're 10 hours apart but we seemed to hit it off so we kept texting. Since then he's drove up here once for a 4 day weekend and we met half way another weekend. Both times things just feel comfortable, like we've known each other for a long time. \n\nA couple weeks ago I mentioned I was going to a party and he jokingly mentioned me not sleeping with other guys. I was taken aback since we'd never talked about being exclusive and I asked him about it. We talked for about four hours about a bad experience with his high school sweetheart (she cheated a couple times and dragged him along for a while). I told him I wouldn't sleep with anyone else if he didn't want me to. He said over and over again how he didn't want to make me do something, but I told him I cared about his opinion. He said he wasn't used to someone saying that (he's only had a couple short lived relationships since his hs ex). Over all the conversation ended great and he's been a lot sweeter to me.\n\nSo I'm going to see him for another long weekend at the end of September I think I want to ask him to make it official. We're already exclusive so I don't really see a reason not to. But if he chooses not to be official I feel it would be a good time to end the relationship. I really enjoy seeing him and talking to him, but I'm not sure I want to commit to him if he's not ready to commit to me. But I get that I'm young and can be a little over emotional, so I just want your guys' opinion on this.", "summary": "been in an unofficial LDR for a few months, thinking about asking him to shit or get off the pot next time we see each other."}
{"id": "t3_1if9pg", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "401(k) versus investing in stocks?", "post": "From what I understand the 401(k) allows you to select a portion of your income to be put aside while being tax exempt and sometimes an employer may offer to \"match up\" the amount you put in.\n\nHow does the 401(k) money grow? Can you invest the money in the fund? Does the employer offer a rate or is the \"match up\" amount the only amount you get?\n\nIf this being the case wouldn't it be much better in the long term to invest in stocks as historically the stock market is said to have a 10-11% growth on average (so no doubt there would be ridiculous downs and ups in between a few decades).\n\nI am going to basic training in a few weeks and is the first time i ever had money. So I want to make a wise decision.\n\nOne of the things i have to think about is college. If i decide to put aside a large chunk of the money I receive into the 401(k) then that money shouldn't be used for college as it would be deducted. I understand that the military will pay for some college through the GI Bill, however perhaps I decide to become a doctor and require additional schooling. Then instead of having invested money into the 401(k) wouldn't it have been wiser to have saved the money for schooling instead of investing it?\n\nUnfortunately my parents and friends are hopeless resources for this kind of information. I also don't know anyone who can help me with this kind of information so here I am.", "summary": "How do 401(k)s earn money and do stocks outperform 401(k)s in the long run? (I'd prefer you having read it )"}
{"id": "t3_34arxo", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "A friend of mine imposed themselves into my birthday plans and I'm not sure if I want them around. What should I do?", "post": "So a friend of mine kind of just invited herself to my birthday festivities. I find this to be kind of annoying. I'm not sure if I exactly want to see her because last time we spoke she said some things that upset me and I'm still a little mad about that. She also invited another mutual friend to drive her down. I know this other friend has a crush on me and she gets kind of clingy and weird. I could see this being a problem because I kind of invited this other girl I'm interested in. \n\nHow do I get out of this situation without hurting anyone's feelings? I'm planning on going barhopping in the town surrounding my school and I'm worried about lying then having pictures on social media do me in.\n\nEdit", "summary": "friend invited her and another friend to my birthday party. Not sure if I want to see them, but I also don't want to hurt anyone's feelings."}
{"id": "t3_1tarsf", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by putting hydrogen peroxide in my eye. Shameful burn and burning shame.", "post": "It was actually last night. But anyways, I had just completed a 9 hour drive from Montana to Washington for the holidays so i smoked a celebratory bowl. After a while, my mom wanted to take some family pictures but since my eyes were red i wanted to put in eye drops first. I'd forgotten mine, and my parents only had saline solution so i figured that was better than nothing. My mom said to look in her bathroom. After rooting around in her cabinets and finding nothing, i saw a big white bottle on the counter and laughed at how dumb i was for missing it earlier. Without looking at the label I grabbed it, tilted my head back, and squirted a good stream into my right eye. As SOON as the first drop hit it immediately started burning. You know that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you know instantly that you just fucked up bad? I grabbed the bottle and that's when i noticed the warning signs all over it. My eye hurt worse than getting stood up on senior prom by your long time crush, I thought i'd permanently blinded my right eye. Asked my mom to find the saline solution so i could flush my eye with that and she grabbed it from the first cabinet I had looked in. She laughed and said \"I guess we aren't taking pictures tonight\".", "summary": "Stoned -> Dry eyes -> No eyedrops -> Saline solution flush? -> Oops, not saline solution -> Hydrogen peroxide contact cleaner Pain -> Self-pity"}
{"id": "t3_1e2vnl", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Help with removing erroneous item on credit report", "post": "Hi, hoping this is the right sub for my question, apologies if not.\n\nI was browsing my account on Credit Karma recently and saw the message that \"1 account has gone into collections\". I thought this couldn't be right, so I looked and it said I had a $277 balance in collections by an agency called \"Enhanced Recovery Company\". Around the same time my mom let me know that the company had been leaving messages for me on her home phone. \n\nI didn't see any way that this could be a legit debt, as my only debts are my car loan and one credit card. Also, I don't know how they got my mom's phone number, as I haven't used that number as my own in well over a decade. Every lease and agreement I've signed has been using my personal cell phone number.\n\nAbout two months ago I sent the company a debt validation letter via certified mail, and once they received it the phone calls stopped and I haven't heard back from them since. I'm just wondering what my next step should be in getting this removed from my credit report. \n\nThanks for any help you can give me!", "summary": "Noticed an account in collections that I believed to be in error, sent a debt validation letter and haven't heard from the collection agency since they received it two months ago."}
{"id": "t3_37dwdf", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I (kind of) saved my older brother's life", "post": "Okay so I know this isn't like the most major thing, but I just feel good about listening to my gut and stuff, and doing a good thing. So we're both in our early 20s. Me and my older brother haven't had the best relationship for most of our lives, and though it has been getting better lately we still are kind of figuring out how to be open with each other and stuff, and he hasn't said anything about it. Not that I would really expect him to, as it really wasn't that big of a deal.\n\nAnyways, I just feel good and want to tell someone without being all high-and-mighty and whatnot.\n\nWe were just on vacation, and we were swimming in the ocean. We had rented out a paddle board, but the winds were kind of strong so we only got one good run in a small bay, then decided to go to a different beach. This beach had bigger waves, and just as much wind. \n\nWe get there and he just gets right in on the paddle board and was out there for just a minute or so before I decided to go swimming. After a few minutes I noticed that he wasn't up on the board anymore so I looked around and saw some flailing arms with a paddle and figured it was him. He steadied up though and began swimming back to shore. I had a thought that he might be struggling but I figured he would be fine.\n\nAfter a minute or two I realize that he's still trying to get back to shore but hasn't made any real progress, so I decide to swim over and see if he needed any help. I get over there and ask if he needed help, but he was too winded to say anything. I asked if he was okay and he still didn't respond. So I just grabbed the board and swam him to the shore while he just hung on and dragged behind. He was tired out of his mind. \n\nHe was totally fine, just tired. Although with the wind that day, who knows what would have happened otherwise. I didn't do anything that crazy, but I helped my brother out, and that feels pretty good.", "summary": "Big bro went out with paddle board in the windy wavy ocean, got really tired and couldn't make it back to shore, I went out and swam him back"}
{"id": "t3_2cgykl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my GF [18F] of 1 year need help rebuilding trust after she cheated during an extremely hard time in her life and our relationship.", "post": "Basically I am looking for any exercises or ideas that people have had success with that helped them regain trust in each other after something happened like cheating or repeated lies. I've already decided to try and work this out, and if something similar happens again I know to leave the relationship and move on, but I want to give it a real 110% chance and I have no idea where to start with something like this.\n\nWe have already talked about her completely cutting all contact and writing a message to the person in question about why it was wrong and to never talk to her again and all that, I am more looking for advice on how me and her can work together in order to rebuild that trust. We understand it will take time but we have no idea where to begin.\n\nBackstory on what happened - Basically she deals with severe depression and due to issues in our relationship and a lot of stressors that were out of either of our hands she was intimate with 2 other people in order to get through that time period. I was very much in the wrong during this time period and was hostile and I know that I caused a lot of it so while that may sound bad I have made the decision to move past it and try and work things out. Recently she was caught in a lie about one of the people where she wasn't honest about what happened between them, and I feel like there is another person involved that she is not telling me the whole truth about either, but that could just be me over-thinking things.\n\nI need some advice and please try and refrain from the \"leave her and find someone better\" stuff, because that is really not what I want for better or for worse and I already know everything I am ever going to learn about the reasons to make that decision, so please try and be constructive.", "summary": "What are some exercises that I can do with my GF that will rebuild trust in her after she cheated on me and lied about it afterwards."}
{"id": "t3_1pbrda", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18M) just told my LDR girlfriend (17) that I love her but want an open relationship, she didn't take it well.", "post": "Title says it all, we've been together on and off for about 9 months. Within these 9 months she has slept with me and one other person, her ex boyfriend before me. (Might not matter but, she has been sexual with 4 boys, excluding me.) Where as I have only been intimate with her (she is also the only girl I have ever had sex with)\n\nEarlier today I told her that I love her and want to be with her, but I also want to experience different people.\n\nWe live 2 hours away by plane in different countries so it's really difficult for us to see eachother often. The last time I saw her was the beginning of this month. \n\nShe has told me she never wants to speak to me again and to leave her alone, she told me to \"FUCK OFF\" and that she doesn't want anything to do with me. \n\nI was wondering how I could make this easier for her. I don't want her to be upset. I guess I don't really know what I'm asking, just advice and how I can keep being friends with her (most importantly, stay with her and still be able to explore different people)\n\nLittle", "summary": "told LDR girlfriend that I want an open relationship, she doesn't want anything to do with me. I want to be with her still."}
{"id": "t3_2lxz1c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [22f] developing feelings for an introvert [24m] and don't know how to handle it", "post": "I've [22f] always been a very outgoing and confident person and have never had any issues with guys or dating. I've always thought I had men figured out and knew how to get their attention. \n\nIn September I transferred to a different university where I met this guy [24m]. He is extremely attractive, funny, smart, ambitious and masculine. Everything I look for in a guy. However, he is totally a closed book. He is not shy by any stretch, but we have been constantly around each other for 3 months now and I know next to nothing about him on a personal level. He doesn't even have a facebook.\n\nWe are in the same group of friends at school and spend a lot of time around each other. We often carpool, study together and get drinks after class etc. We have also have spent quite some time alone, but thats only when we study and the rest of our friends leave or when I give him a ride home.\n\nThere are some days where he will start to open up to me a bit and flirt, and I can really feel the chemistry between us. But there will be other days where he will go the entire day without saying hi or talking to me (or anyone for that matter) even though we are in all of each others lectures.\n\nEveryone in our group of friends agrees that he is strangely private, but they've accepted it and say that it's because he's an introvert. However, I don't want to accept it because I really want to get to know him better because I can't remember the last time I've felt this way about a guy.\n\nI've tried to show my interest by inviting him to events and I always help him out with assignments and invite him to have lunch with me. He almost always accepts but has never done the same for me. \n\nI can't read him at all. He's always in his own little world and I just want to know if he has any interest in me at all. The mixed signals are frustrating.", "summary": "I'm falling for a guy who is very introverted and I don't know how to tell if he's interested in me or how to further get his attention. I feel like maybe I intimidate him because we are such different personalities."}
{"id": "t3_2ej7yh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32M] with my GF [27F]. She's jealous of my photos with ex, and doesn't believe I deleted the porn videos.", "post": "I'm with my girlfriend for 10 months and we are very happy together. I love her and can't imagine myself with another person.  \n\nA while ago, she saw some old pictures of me and my ex-girlfriend and became super jealous and very mean to me the whole afternoon. She said she was not jealous. She claimed that she was disappointed that I took my ex-girlfriend's out kayaking, zip-lining, and do all the stuff that she wants to do, but I never took her out, even though I'm from this area, and she has never been here before until we met. But I think she's clearly just jealous. We always go out and do things on the weekends. She complains about me never making any arrangement, and she always takes the initiative to reserve things, book things, plan things.   \n\nRecently she brought up the topic of my ex-girlfriends almost every day, because I have some homemade sex videos and photos with them. They are just good memories, and it's not like I look at them everyday, but I think it'll be fun to watch them and laugh about it when I'm 90. Anyway, she was very upset, so I deleted all the porn videos, and then I put the other photos with my ex-girlfriends in an encrypted disk image on my laptop.    \n\nThis weekend she came across the encrypted disk image while doing some work on my laptop and again became super mad at me. I just hid the pictures so that she wouldn't see them and gets super jealous. I already deleted all the porn videos, but she wouldn't believe me. What can I do?", "summary": "Girlfriend was super jealous about my photos with ex. I deleted my sex videos with my ex, and hide the photos to make her feel better, but she doesn't believe me."}
{"id": "t3_ua0go", "subreddit": "books", "title": "Help needed: Books for young man with little interest in reading", "post": "I'm trying to invoke an interest in reading in my younger brother but I'm struggling to find novels that would suit him. \n\nHe's an electrician by trade, has interests in motorbikes, cars and sports and has historically shown an aversion to reading but I believe it's only because a) I don't think he can read at an advanced level and b) he hasn't found a genre that interests him. He is 21 and has no interest in fantasy, sci-fi or anything that seems unrealistic or unconventional. \n\nI can tell that he would enjoy bios, crime fiction, military fiction and associated genres but as I don't get into these very much I'm struggling to find stuff that might interest him. \n\nSo, r/books, can you help me out with your suggestions please?\n\nThe more enthralling the better because I think he needs to develop his attention span. Also, it has to be pretty easy reading for reasons aforementioned. \n\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "Book suggestions to garner interest in half-literate younger brother. Genres: bio, crime and military fiction, survivalist, coming of age etc."}
{"id": "t3_2zt8im", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my Girlfriend [18F] of 3 months, she didn't ask me if it was ok.", "post": "My girlfriend's best friend is a another guy which is no problem. I told her that he was a bit too touchy with her for my liking and he toned it down and we (her friend and I) talked it out, he saw where i was coming from. \n\nMy girlfriend told me that her best friend and someone else were talking about grad dates and she offered herself with one of her (girl)friends. She didnt even consider telling me anything until the next day.\n\nWhen me and her friends went out the next day she brought it up saying, \"so what are we wearing to this guys grad\". I was suprised and i couldnt believe she didnt tell me.\n\nShe then told me that he asked her (which he didnt), i dont understand why she would lie we've always been honest. I told her in the end that its her decision if she wants to go, but im not happy with it.", "summary": "My girlfriend told me that her male best friend asked her to his grad, she lied she offered herself to go. I told her its her decision but im not happy with it."}
{"id": "t3_4ls4l9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my Girlfriend [19/F] of 8 months said she isn't attracted to me.", "post": "We have been together for 8 months in a long term relationship where I'm able to visit every month or so. She told me she isn't getting pleasure when we have sex and at first she said it was because she stopped finding me sexually attractive a few months ago. She told me I was cute and she loved my personality but I wasn't stimulating her sexually. \n\nI am a skinny guy, kinda short 5\"7 with average/below average looks. \n\nI was really hurt from this and we tried talking it out but I stopped the conversation and went to bed. The morning after she told me it wasn't that she found me unattractive but she wasn't getting pleasure from having sex because of the anxiety of trying to please me and the pain from sex. She also thinks that her birth control medication is affecting her sex drive. I feel all of those explanations may be backtracking to protect me from being hurt, but they very well could be the reason. \n\nWe were both virgins before the relationship and sex has been really painful for her in the past. Right now its hard for me to believe her explanation and I feel like the romantic/sex side of our relationship isnt based on truth or mutual feelings. She says she wants to keep working to improve our sex life.", "summary": "Gf said she doesnt find me attractive, later says its hard for her to enjoy sex because of several reasons. What do I believe?"}
{"id": "t3_1l67gw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24f] wife asked me [23m] if I want an open relationship", "post": "We've been together 3 years, she's my first everything, she's had many guys before. We've had lots of arguments (unrelated to sex) but I've resented her for not wanting to experiment as much with me sexually.\n\nA few months ago she asked if I wanted an open relationship so I can find other girls (she would not want others). At the time I thought and told her no way, but now I find myself staring at other women. Last weekend we went camping and a friend-of-a-friend came, and we flirted hardcore and it felt really great.\n\nThe problems are 3fold:\n* I'm worried she might want another guy (selfish, I know)\n* I'm worried this is some kind of test\n* I'm worried I will hurt her if I do this, even though she asked.\n\nShe has been cheated on a lot and had lots of bad relationships, so I'm her first \"nice\" man. I now have strong sexual desires for other girls but don't want to hurt her. I'm not sure how I can tell her what I did with the girl (just flirting, no touching) without feeling awful.", "summary": "Wife has been cheated on a lot in the past, asked me if I want to fuck other girls, I now do but I feel guilty because I'm her first nice/caring partner."}
{"id": "t3_31a0oz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my boyfriend [24M]; dislike and am unattracted to his style evolving into a more 'alternative' style", "post": "Boyfriend, A, and I have been dating a little over a year. Recently he's been expressing interest in getting tattoos and piercings (of which he currently has none), and has just dyed his hair bright pink. I'm all for self-expression or whatever, but my attraction to him absolutely plummeted from a 110% to 30 upon seeing pink hair. I know if he keeps doing this alternative stuff, especially tattoos, it will make him increasingly unattractive to me. I don't want to outright tell him he looks ugly to me and that I find it very, very hard to take him seriously , but I also don't want to feel like I'm pressuring him into doing something. Advice on how to approach this problem?", "summary": "Me [22F] with SO [24M], looking for advice on how to approach my dwindling attraction due to his style choices."}
{"id": "t3_2q20z5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18F) am depressed severely, affecting my LDR", "post": "Hello all. I will be attending a psych this afternoon but wanted to ask a few stuff here before if I should mention my problems.\n\nI started a birth control for the first time, Yaz/Yasmin, a pill, late September because my LDR boyfriend would be visiting me on October. A few days after bcp, I turned into a psychopath, severely depressed and severely annoying monster. I would always pick up fights. A day before he would fly out here, I made the biggest mess in our relationship ever. When he was here we had zero problems. Zero. The day he left I couldn't even move from my bed. Afterwards is just worse, break ups everyday. I kept using the pill until we found out it made me a monster. I stopped it right away and the fights stopped the same week. But now it left me emotionless and depressed for life. I feel so numb, sometimes no emotions for my boyfriend even though I know I love him. I don't feel happiness, I don't feel jealous of him, I don't feel any emotions besides pain, if it is considered and emotion. This makes a huge problem because when I am angry I started saying whatever is in my mind. \n\nThis morning when I woke up, I saw that he still was playing video games. I wrote a few hurtful things, one of which \"How do you expect me to plan a future with someone who obsessively plays video games?\" and we are on the verge of breaking up, he is sleeping now so I don't know really. \n\nMy question is, should I mention this to my psych today? That I am feeling numb, and how it is destroying my relationship?", "summary": "Ex-psycho and crazy bitch turned into an emotionless evil ice cube. Relationship will be damaged beyond repairable level if I don't stop being a stupid moron."}
{"id": "t3_2roqm6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28] after not going through with something I really wanted to because of a personal secret, I am thinking about telling my friends [28 M/F] or at least 1 of them [28F] that I am a bisexual. Not sure if a good idea", "post": "Long story short, my best friends, who we have all been friends for many years, and I almost got into a MFM threesome on a drugged-out NYE, but I chickened out because I didn't want to reveal to my friends my sexual preferences. I am a bisexual. After having many years to think about, I am 100% sure this is the case. I now feel like my friends are looking at me like 'why would makefunnotother not want to get in on this? is there something wrong with him?' tbh it was all my idea and now that I chickended out I feel like a have some explaining to do. \n\nThe only person I have ever told this to would be therapists and I really never wanted to share this particular part of myself. I personally don't think it's anybody's business. But now I think it might be time to reveal this about myself but i have serious trepidation. I don't want to be called out in public, I don't want it to be a topic of conversation among my friends, I don't want anyone to try and hook me up with some guy, I don't want any of my friends to think I'm in love with them, and I don't want to go through any generally embarrassing discussions with friends and other people I'd generally like to not share this information with. But i do feel like I have to say something to my best friends so we can all look each other the eye again.\n\nShould I just limit it to my best female friend, who may or may not become a gossip queen about it, my other best friend who may get drunk and try mention it slyly in public to be funny or get a rise, or just keep it to myself and not risk a public conversation.", "summary": "Skipped out on MFM threesome with my friends because I didn't want to reveal that I was a bisexual, but now I regret it and maybe would like to share, but nervous about effects and consequences."}
{"id": "t3_euwkc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Girlfriend of 3 years tells me she was raped, but also cheated on me with a guy. Kind of confused....", "post": "So here's the deal. My girlfriend tells me one night she has a confession. She let a guy feel her up whilst she was high with her friend. I get pretty pissed about it but we work it out eventually and move on.\n\nAround a month later things came to a head and she tells me that after she let the guy feel her up, he proceeded to rape her. Now that sounds really serious I know, but directly after she tells me this, she also mentions that she fucked a guy in a broom closet at her work Christmas party (a good few weeks after the 'feeling up').\n\nNow keep in mind she didn't tell me about the 'rape' part until a month after it happened, and conveniently slipped in the fact that she had fucked another guy at the end of the conversation. She doesn't want to do anything about the 'rape' because she says she is too embarrassed and we wouldn't be able to do anything at this point.\n\nI know it makes me sound like a horrible human being, but I am inclined to not believe her about the 'rape' as I feel she is making it up so I can't get angry at her about her cheating on me. Is this just me?", "summary": "My girlfriend tells me she was raped, but in the same sentence tells me she cheated on me. I don't believe the rape part."}
{"id": "t3_2v9bu1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Update: I [31 M] let myself into the apartment next to my girlfriends [34 F] to prevent a fire. She is mad I filed a police report about it.", "post": "Original Post: \n\nSince we broke up we haven't talked much but agreed to talk about how we are going to handle the Caribbean vacation tomorrow.  That wont be happening it looks like.  Tonight I get an email that she cancelled my flight.  I started doing some digging and was able to find out that she is now going on the vacation with her ex fiance.\n\nYou guys called it there was more going on.  I am cutting all contact with her so I can have a clean break and move on to the next part of my life.\n\nBy the way anyone know of a fun place to travel with my flight voucher from the cancelled ticket? lol (I'm in the US)", "summary": "Saved girlfriends apartment from burning down, she breaks up with me over something petty, and is now going on what was supposed to be our Caribbean vacation with her ex fiance."}
{"id": "t3_31wsip", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Tifu by trying to scare my friend", "post": "This FU actually happened today (surprise surprise). So in my class there's this one girl who I'm really good friends with (let's call her Sandra). Now Sandra is absolutely terrified of spiders. Like I mean absolutely terrified beyond belief. So smartass me thought it would be a great idea to show her a picture of my pet tarantula (he is really cute I swear). What I didn't have really in mind is how she'd react to it... She smacked the phone with all her might like some Bruce Lee style stuff as I stood there in terror watching my phone slowly float through the air and land face first on the concrete floor. My heart broke in half as I heard the glass shatter and get thrown about. RIP Oneplue one 7.6.2014-8.4.2015 you shall never be forgotten.", "summary": "Showed picture of a tarantula to my arachnophobic friend and watched as my phone got riven apart by physics"}
{"id": "t3_2o0c01", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16M] Need some help with a girl [15F]", "post": "Alright, to start of i'm going to say that i've always been a pretty awkward guy, this is really the first year that i've gotten away from that.\n\nSo there's a girl that I like, and I *think* that she likes me as well. I have a couple of reasons to think this, and I'll list them out here.\n\nThe first one is that we did go to homecoming together, my second is that when we were watching a movie with some friends, she was kind of like leaning against me basically for the entire thing (I think this was more as a friendly thing, but again I don't know). The last one is that pretty much all of our mutual friends want me to ask her out, but I just don't know.\n\nAny questions that anyone wants to ask i'll be happy to answer, i'm just looking for some help here, thanks!", "summary": "Want to ask out girl i've known for about ~1 year, only started developing feelings after about 6 months, need some help."}
{"id": "t3_1n55o0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Does Signal Loss from Coaxial Splitters, Cable Length, etc, affect internet speed/quality?", "post": "So recently I had an issue where my modem wouldn't connect because I was getting too much signal loss due to a 6-way splitter meant for different frequencies than comcast cable (it must have been used by previous homeowner and first comcast guy just used it instead of replacing it). The down and upstream lights were on, but not the 'online' one (dpc3000).\n\nComcast guy replaced the splitter, as it was pushing my signal loss to too much. \n\nSo I was wondering, if I reduced the signal loss further (as it now is within spec), would it improve internet speed/quality? I could just remove the splitter since I'm only using a single line (connection to modem). I could probably cut and reduce the line length too.\n\nThanks.", "summary": "does reducing signal loss thats already within spec improve my internet (comcast xfinity, genereally 10-20ms 25/5 - which is what I pay for)."}
{"id": "t3_yxqyb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "High school lunchroom problem between my 16 yr. old girlfriend and I (17 years old male) and my circle of friends.", "post": "Put as simply as possible: is it wrong of me to choose to sit with my group of 7 friends (who are all guys) at lunch and not wanting my girlfriend of 2.5 months sitting with me? \nTypical high school relationship problems, yes I get it. But I can't shake this feeling that I was a dick. I love my friends, I've known them since I was like 7 and they helped me through a lot, and we hang out more as a closed kinda group. So I asked one of them privately and he said it would be awkward for all of us, us being the other 6 guys. \nThen I looked at how she would feel; I never introduced her to them before, and what if we broke up during the semester? Awkward as hell right? I always try to put my best friends first, but at the same time I hate making people upset, especially her. (And I wanna stress that I **hate** making people upset. Deeper problem that doesn't belong in this subreddit.)", "summary": "Am I a bad guy for not wanting my girlfriend to sit with my close group of friends at lunch? And is there anyway I could sorta find a medium so no one gets that awkward situation I'm dreading?"}
{"id": "t3_2d4sh5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Did my ex [20/F] cheat on me [19/M]?", "post": "So my ex and I began dating 4 years ago and have recently broken up on mutual terms, it just wasn't working. There were no hard feelings and we're trying to remain good friends.\n\nHowever at working yesterday the topic of cheating was brought up where everyone was saying whether they've cheated or been cheated on. I didn't think I had such a story but I told what I thought was just a dick move on her part. \n\nA year into the relationship she told me she was starting to develop feelings for one of my best friends at the time. I comforted her and she told me how she only loved me and wanted theses feelings to go away so I understood and didn't think much of it. Three months later she invites me over, crying her eyes out and tells me that she's been dirty talking to him over skype. She then shows me the messages and apologises and says it will never happen again, which it didn't. No pictures were sent, it was only text based.\n\nWhen I told this story everyone at work said that it was cheating and even though I naively denied it was cheating at the time I don't know if it was or how to deal with the news as we're still friends. Do I tell her that it was cheating? Do I keep quiet as it was in the past? Or am I just being an idiot and just forget the whole thing?", "summary": "My ex messed up when dating, not sure if she cheated, if she did I don't know how I should react"}
{"id": "t3_2y36pi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24m] am wondering if I should friendzone myself with new girl [24f].", "post": "Yes, I hate the the word friendzone too because it implies that either girls are stringing along guys for attention or alternatively that guys are just pretending to be friendly in order to get sex. That said, it got your attention, so meh.\n\nSo I have had a rough go of things lately. Got dumped by my first girlfriend and not long after serious health issues arose. In between seizure like episodes and a whole bunch of other symptoms I havent had much time for dating. \n\nAt the same time it is something I have always wanted, and was something that meant so much to me when I started dating this ex (S) at the late age of 22. So while I have sort of been out of commission I have been feeling... lonely... I guess is the word for it. I kept messaging my ex, nothing aggressive or mean just a \"hey\" and some needy follow up once every 2 months until she threatened to call friends and family to get me to stop. Since then I have felt... I dunno... crazy. That was a little while.\n\nThe past couple months health has improved. I have been making more friends and have started getting back into interests outside of work and doctors visits. I messaged this one girl I used to hang out with and we met up to go to perform at a comedy show. Other friends were there, so it wasn't like a date, but I really liked spending time with her. We made plans to do it again.\n\nI guess my worry is... all my other friends are completely coupled with a SO. Add to the fact that I want to do more comedy and would like someone to do it with. I am very eager to date someone but am not sure with my condition and just the way I have been that it is a good idea or even fair for her. Some of my symptoms might make things a little tricky. Id be fine with a friend to do shows with... but I dont know where my health could go and this could be my last chance for all I know. I am not super experienced so I am also worried that I reading into something that's not there.", "summary": "AFTER MANY HEALTH ISSUES I MIGHT HAVE A CHANCE WITH A GIRL BUT AM NOT SURE IF IT IS WORTH PURSUING BECAUSE I NEED THE FRIENDSHIP"}
{"id": "t3_33z99y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my girlfriend [18 F] 4 months, starting to think I'm just another number", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nI've been dating this girl for 4 months now, and long story short it's been great. I shouldn't complain, but yet I keep feeling as if I'm just another number. \n\nLet me elaborate. I'm a virgin and haven't been in many relationships (2) before this. On the other hand, she's been with a few guys and isn't a virgin. (She had some self esteem issues, which may be why she wanted to have sex soon.) \n\nSo now we're getting to the point where we're thinking about having sex. As much as I'd like to, I feel like I'd be just another number. Like it would just be meaningless.", "summary": "I feel like I'd be just another number if I have sex with my girlfriend. Am I wrong for thinking this way? Any advice would be great."}
{"id": "t3_ere5p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Redditors,I want your help to create a digital time capsule for the year 2010 that we can look back on in 5 years, your predictions on where we'll be in 2015!", "post": "This doesn't have to be formal. I'd just love to get a ton of people to share their opinions on a ton of subjects relevant to 2010 (e.g. Assange/Wikileaks, President Obama's first 2 years as President of the U.S., thoughts on the wars Iraq and Iran (approx. 8yrs into 'em), the state of our economy. \n\nActually, since so many redditors claim to be financial experts one area or another, so I think would be great to get predictions for the markets, specific stocks, funds, commodities, housing, etc.\n\nWill we be less reliant on fossil fuels? Will more cars in the US be powered by electricity? Do you predict any major natural disasters by 2015? Will another country become a \"superpower?\" Do you foresee in any major wars (hopefully not, though!)?\n\nYou can also write about personal things that only you''ll know about when you re-read them (e.g. did you and S.O. finally get married, did a major decision in the near future turn out the way you expected it,\" and/or did the career change wnd up being the best decision?\n\nThe list goes on...I'd love to see a lot of opinions from Reddit's diverse crowd from around the world. Oh if you think adding certain identifying traits will be relevant to how we interpret these predictions in 5 years, then please include them (e.g. age, country, etc.).", "summary": "I'm making a digital time capsule other redditors should re-read in 5 years (I'll re-post it). Write about anything: politics, opinions, personal, predictions, stocks, etc.*"}
{"id": "t3_3zebug", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 /F] with my __date_ [31 M] 3 months, unsure of exclusivity etiquette", "post": "been dating a dude for 3 months. To be honest, it seems more like a FWB type deal. Some days he texts me a lot, some days I barely hear from him. We hang out at least twice a week. Sometimes we go on dates, sometimes we cuddle and watch TV. He has not asked me to be his girlfriend, and told me from day 1 that it takes a while for him to ask someone that.\n\nI posted on Facebook about someone asking me out in a creative way, and he messaged me basically saying \"not that we are exclusive but I see you posting about dates on Facebook, just curious if we should be using condoms during sex?\"\n\nWe never explicitly said we were or weren't exclusive, so I sort of assumed we were. \n\nI'm confused at his angle. If we're not exclusive, if you're seeing other people wouldn't that mean we should be using condoms? Why is it only if *i'm* seeing other people would that be necessary?\nOr is this implying that he isn't actually seeing anyone else?\n\nOh Reddit. How do I proceed?", "summary": "3 months in it is confirmed we aren't exclusive, but guy told me \"if you're seeing someone else we should use condoms.\" Can't tell if he's seeing someone else, not sure how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_3aza2k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] unsure of what to say to [25 M] friend who I think likes me. Not mutual", "post": "This is a guy that went to the same college as I did. We have mutual friends. I've seen him at a few parties. Up until a few months ago, we had spoken maybe 4 times. He reached out a few months ago and because I was abroad, asked if we could catch up when I got back. I didn't think anything of it at the time, so I said yes.\n\nWell, that's when he starts ending all of his texts with smiley faces and winks. Always says things like \"I'm just a goofy guy ;)\", \"I'm full of compliments. That's the benefit of me :)\" Like he is trying to sell himself to me. \n\nBegrudgingly, I went to coffee with him. He is honestly a great conversationalist. I would love to just be friends with the guy. I could talk to him for hours but I am not attracted to him and not remotely interested in a relationship. He recently asked me to hang out with him again.\n\nI understand that I need to let him down gently. But he hasn't outrightly said that he likes me. I don't want to come across as the girl who thinks so highly of herself that she has to stop something even if there might not be anything there. I don't want to say to him \"sorry, I'd love to go but I want to make it clear that I'm not looking for a relationship\" and have him say \"dude, I just asked you for coffee. relax\"", "summary": "Super nice guy likes me, I want to JUST be friends but don't know how to make that distinction to him without sounding like a bitch."}
{"id": "t3_1k5qal", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Should I (20/F) break it off now or wait for his (22(M) for his response", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 months and the first four were spectacular. It was the best relationship I ever had. However, he started to get very distant. While he was extremely affectionate and sexually active, now it's completely gone. I've asked him what's wrong and he said nothing's wrong. He's not stressed or depressed. Everything was just fine.\nA couple nights ago, I had a breakdown over a personal incident and he just looked me and eventually left the room without saying anything. He just didn't do anything and just went to bed like it didn't even happen.\n\nThe next morning, I was already stressed about that personal incident and stressed about his atitude that I full on sat him and down and told him that I felt that he is very uninterested in our relationship as of late and I'm wondering why he was still in it if he didn't feel the same way. He finally said that he doesn't know what he wants anymore and that he's sorry that he hasn't treated me well lately but he doesn't know what to do. And then he said I have to think about the reasons why I'm still in this relationship. I nodded and left and have made the decision to give him space until he decides to contact me with whatever he says.\n\nBut I'm no idiot. That response looks like a huge hint to breaking up but should I give him space and wait for his response or should I just break it off now?\nHas anyone had any good experiences like this?", "summary": "Boyfriend says he needs time to figure out reasons on why he's in the relationship and why he feels so uninterested and I'm debating whether to wait or break it off myself."}
{"id": "t3_3kcbu7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 3 months, barely eats or drinks water and frequently gets headaches.", "post": "Today she ate an apple and some spinach. It's now almost 10pm and for the last hour (I've been studying all day so I've been with her for an hour) she's been complaining about a migraine. I keep telling her she needs to eat and drink and she won't say anything but that she needs advil or excedrin, even after I gave her one of my hydrocodone pills (right when I got to her place) because she seemed so miserable when I walked in the door. Only after telling her over and over to eat and being inattentive when she brought anything else up did she decide to heat up some chicken and eat it with a piece of bread. My worry is that she does this all the time, eating what I would guess is around 400 calories a day, except on days when I nag her she probably eats up to 1500 calories max, with days on exception where she will just eat a whole lot. Those days are about once or twice a week, when she's either really high or fucked up. What do I do? I don't get why she doesn't realize she's hurting herself :( Also, for a long time I didn't nag her or say anything because I didn't want to offend her but now I care too much", "summary": "Girlfriend doesn't eat or drink, has side effects, doesn't understand the connection, stubbornly refuses to help herself despite my clear, consistent, calm, and thoroughly logical protests."}
{"id": "t3_xqnam", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "A question for all of you winners who have reached your goal weight.", "post": "I'm currently on my way down from my all-time high weight of 175.8. I'm 5'6 so I know that doesn't sound all that high, but I felt like crap and I was eating terribly and not working out. I've been running 3-4 times a week for about 30 minutes and just finished my first 5K today! \n\nI'm down ten pounds since the end of May with 10-15 more to go, and I'm motivated and confident now, eating about 1600 calories a day and tracking all of my food, but I'm really concerned about what will happen when I hit my goal weight. I've lost a little weight in the past but as soon as I got stressed, I gained it all right back. How have you managed to keep the weight off once you've reached your goal?\n\nAlso, I've been researching how many calories I'd need a day to maintain my weight and finding that that number falls around 2100 calories per day. Wouldn't eating that many calories make me regain all of the weight I'd have lost? It seems like a lot to me! How many calories do you eat a day to maintain your weight, and has eating your so-called \"maintenance number\" caused you to regain?\n\nAny wisdom would be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "Lost weight, more to go, concerned that \"maintenance calorie level\" will cause me to regain when I reach my goal"}
{"id": "t3_v6joo", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25/m] Fling with LD girl faded but always thinking about her", "post": "Okay, I don't really need advice per se, but I find myself thinking about this at least every other day. I met a girl out of town and it was great. We had a little fling, I went back to see her a couple times, she came to see me. We had a great time. She's awesome etc. We live far away (5 hour drive) and it would never work out. We used to text back and forth but eventually she faded out texting me back. Didn't want a relationship etc. I understood this and knew I was being a little silly but I was just running with it. No fallout, no bad times, just fade away. This was a little over a year ago now. The problem is I've never been happier with anyone else in my life. I find myself thinking about her almost everyday, and the urge to just let her know how I feel, and that I wish her the best (I never say anything.)  I usually just try to write it off as missing the special feeling of that fling. I've had other girls since, and I've got active prospects and a booty call... so it's not that I'm lonely/obsessed. However, these aren't fulfilling any emotional holes (maybe I am lonely.) I say this because I keep telling myself that's all it is -- missing that good feeling that she gave me.\n\nMy only problem is I feel it so strongly I want her to know. I know she won't care -- actually I'm afraid she will and react negatively. I'm sure she's totally moved on and it wasn't that significant to her, but I feel it so strongly I just want to let her know someone out there cares for her, but I don't want her to think I'm some kind of creepy stalker for coming out with this a year later.\n\nI probably still won't say anything and will let this post satisfy me for now. I just needed to get this out somewhere, but what do you think? Will it brighten her day or freak her out?\n\nI told myself I could marry her the day after I met her and I still feel that way even though I think marriage is ridiculous... I got it bad", "summary": "Probably in love with someone far away that doesn't reciprocate the feeling but want to let her know without weirding her out"}
{"id": "t3_cf9jf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why the number 12?", "post": "I have a theory about where the idea of a \"dozen\" came from and I'm wondering if anyone knows if it's correct.  A search just brings up lots of information about bakers dozens, but I can't find anything on my theory.\n\nMy parents grew up in India and I always see them counting on their knuckle segments.  If you use your thumb as a marker, you can count 12 knuckle segments on that hand.  I always assumed that this is where we got a dozen from.\n\nThe number 60 also comes up a lot (60 minutes, etc.).  I always assumed that that was because the other hand was used to count five cycles of 12, giving us 60.\n\nAnyone know if that's correct?", "summary": "12 knuckle segments on the fingers of one hand (excluding thumb), other hand has 5 fingers and 5x12 = 60 (another prominent number)"}
{"id": "t3_13085n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[m16] am confused where to go with gf [f16] of a year", "post": "Just wanted to ask a question that's been drifting on my mind recently and get some other opinions to look at. Just some background so you get the picture, I've been with this girl for about a year now. She's my first what I would consider \"serious\" girlfriend, seeing as I was incredibly shy and never really approached girls in any way other then a friend. Soon after I met this girl, I quickly fell in love, as she was the complete package to me. Fit, funny, caring, you name it she had. I liked her a lot, and she stuck with me when things got bumpy. Even to this day, I can't say I don't love her. \n\nEver since meeting this girl, I've shot up in confidence and broken out of my shell. I'm much  more outspoken and I feel like I can approach people I'm interested in talking to and hold a conversation. And this is were the problem comes in.\n\nI feel as with this new found confidence, I need to go out and talk to more girls. I want to get to know other girls better. In a way, this sort of ties in to what our relationship is at this point, me and my gf, which feels as if it has lost that \"it\" factor. Things don't feel the same as they once did. I still love her, but it feels kind of meh. This coupled with the fact that I want to go meet other girls and talk makes me wonder whether I should stay with this girl and continue what we have for easily a long time (I'm very confident in our relationship) or end it, and try to meet other girls?", "summary": "Should I stay with extremely stable relationship which as gotten to some degree stale, or move on and try to meet other girls?"}
{"id": "t3_4tqgk4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30M] with my Father [61M] no contact for 6 years, he wants to get back in contact", "post": "This is a tough decision. My Father stopped speaking to me 6 years ago after I looked after my Mother during their divorce.\n\nHe had been emotionally abusive and manipulative towards her for as long as I can remember. It eventually escalated into physical abuse, at which point I lived in my own place and had her stay with me for a while.\n\nShe decided she wanted a divorce. Ever since then my Father stopped speaking to me, I haven't spoken or had contact with anyone on his side of the family since (his side of the family are all very judgmental).\n\nMy siblings, 20s F & 20s M still live with him and he still manipulates them.\n\nI have tried to contact him over the last few years but he didn't want to know. Now all of a sudden my sister told me he wants to get back in contact, I'm not sure whether I want this or not, it's a difficult decision.", "summary": "Father was abusive to Mother, I looked after her during their divorce. Father didn't speak to me for 6 years, now wants contact. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1pdzne", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] am breaking up with my SO [23M] of 2 years this afternoon and I keep losing my nerve, need some encouragement", "post": "So we have been dating for two years now and all the fire in our relationship is just gone. I don't think I am attracted to him anymore and I would like to start dating other people. Yesterday we had a huge break down because we haven't been having sex lately and he was justifiably upset about it. He basically made me feel bad for not wanting to sleep with him so we did and it was the worst thing ever. I have never felt so gross before, but I hated every second of it and afterwards I just wanted to cry because I could see how exactly opposite he felt about it. \n\nI do not know how to handle this. I think he sees us with a future ahead of us and I just don't. But I keep losing my nerve, and I am terrified of what the future will be like without him. Just because I don't see him in a romantic sense doesn't mean I don't care for him anymore and he is such a huge part of my life that many, many things will change when we break up, such as our group of friends and our living situation. He is my friend but I know there is no way we can be friends after this because I will probably forget all the reasons why we need to break up and we will get back together again.\n\nHe moved to my town to be closer to me about 8 months ago and he really doesn't have anyone here for him besides me. I am afraid to leave him alone. I am terrified to be alone. He is the only person I have ever slept with and he is my best friend. I don't know where to go to do it and I don't know what to say and I don't know how I will get through the next couple of days.", "summary": "I am the worst girlfriend ever and I want to break up with my boyfriend but I am too chickenshit to do it"}
{"id": "t3_gn45f", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Anyone from Dallas or has previously lived in Dallas within the past two years please help (details inside)", "post": "Redditors,\n\nA large group of college students (21+) are going to downtown Dallas this weekend for a formal event, and we are looking for something to do during the day on Saturday to keep us occupied. We are looking for something fun to do that would be entertaining to both sexes. The major restraint is that we are unable to drive, so we are forced to use alternative means of transportation (DART, cabs, etc.). If you have any suggestions of places within the downtown area or easily accessible areas through the aforementioned modes of transportation, please let me know. Also, for the likeminded trolls on reddit, please do not suggest Jaguars or Purgatory. Thanks for your help.", "summary": "What the hell is there to do in downtown Dallas during the day besides looking at fish or bumping shoulders with grandparents in museums?"}
{"id": "t3_2v1t64", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22, M] wish my girlfriend [21, F] would chip in more for her expensive tastes", "post": "My girlfriend and I (dating 2 years) have very different expectations for what is a reasonable lifestyle. She thinks it's reasonable to go out to eat every weekend (for about $125 for 2), go on expensive trips, and generally live pretty freely. However, neither of us make a ton of money (I make 45K, and she makes 28K + a few hundred/month from her Dad). At first I was the sole contributor, for the past year or so it's probably been a 65/35 split (we split most bills, but I end up with the big ones).\n\nNow, left to my own devices, I will spend ~$1500/month. With her, I end up spending nearly everything I earn. Lately my fixed expenses have gone up a little (night classes, car maintenance, electric bill rising, etc...), and I need to cut the luxury spending, but it's nearly impossible to tell her I'm not going out without some sort of uncomfortable conversation. She generally points to the fact that I make more money than her, but she still gets money from her Dad, and she doesn't have many of the expenses I have (car payments, car/medical insurance, night classes, etc...). \n\nOn top of this, I generally drive her nearly everywhere (work, grocery store, etc...) and she hasn't once offered to pay for gas, nor does she offer to pay for food she eats at my house, or heat when she blasts the heater. She's otherwise a wonderful person, but it makes me uncomfortable that she's so unwilling to take on expenses or downgrade her lifestyle. The odd thing is, she wasn't spoiled when she was younger. She never had to lift a finger (didn't even know how to do laundry until college), but her Dad is incredibly frugal, so maybe this is her making up for lost time.\n\nAnyway, how do I bring this up in a reasonable way? With Valentine's day coming up, I feel like I'm expected to drop a few hundred easy, but I'm starting to dip into savings as it is with the new big expenses. Anyone been through anything similar?", "summary": "My gf has expensive taste, but doesn't contribute her piece of the pie. With new expenses looming, I can't afford her shenanigans. How do I bring this up in a way she'd understand?"}
{"id": "t3_urxnh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, if a company promises to show up on a date and doesn't, what should I do?", "post": "So, I contracted with a company to install hardwood flooring in my house.  They were supposed to come a week ago, but the day before I called to confirm and they moved the date to today. I took off work for last week, and again for today so I'd be present for the installation.  Today, they said they were going to show up at 9:30 in the morning, and they haven't shown up yet.  I've been calling the company over and over again, getting voicemail. When they do call me back, they just promise me that they're on the way, and that the truck broke down.  I highly doubt this as it's been five hours since that very first phone call, and if the truck really did break down, couldn't they get a new one?\n\nI'm reluctant to call and cancel because the company made me put down a 50% deposit.  I was stupid enough not to include a date on the contract, and I know that if I record all the promises the company makes over the phone, the recordings might not be admissible.  \n\nReddit, help me please!", "summary": "Carpeting company tells me they'll show up today, turns out to be a no-show.  What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2tgira", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] plan on asking out a close friend [18F]. How should I go about it without looking like just another jerk?", "post": "I met this girl from my college back in November. We text very often and have conversations about our common interests late into the night. It's safe to say we are close friends. She seems to trust me a lot too, and has told me some rather personal things. \n\nI want to ask her out but it's a little difficult. It's hard to get alone time with her because some friend or two always shows up. I'm not very fond of a person in her group of friends so that complicates things too. She seems to like someone else, but that other person is in a relationship and doesn't treat her very well (she knows this). \n\nShe also doesn't take compliments very well in the sense that she doesn't believe she's attractive, intelligent, or whatever good trait you can think of. I guess she might be fishing for compliments, but at the same time she doesn't like how other guys are always trying to get with her. \n\nI'm worried that if I ask her out she'll just dismiss me as another jerk who only wants to sleep with her. How should I ask her out? \n\nAlso, I don't want to wait too long in case I miss my opportunity. I feel sometime in less than a week or two would be the optimal time since it's early in the semester (less work) and there aren't other people that could be potential competition.", "summary": "Want to ask a friend out but it's hard to get alone time with her, she has a low self esteem, and she's always trying to fend off other guys. How should I do it?"}
{"id": "t3_1oh7mk", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "New kitten acting oddly. Does anyone have experience with teething kittens, orphaned kittens in particular?", "post": "Hello /r/pets;\n\nI have a little lady named [Franklyn Weatherbee] We rescued her very young after she was found under my friends truck. We think she was about 2-3 weeks old, she barely had teeth, bright blue eyes and was about a 1/2lb. Now she is almost three months, and has been wonderful. Super sweet, mostly a good little thing, and I've grown to think she is fantastic. \n\nEarlier tonight, she went to chew on something and meeped a little. She then spent some time walking around, sad meowing, pawing a little at her mouth and licking like something was stuck in her teeth. It freaked me out, but she stopped after a few and seemed fine, until she tried to eat some dinner (wet food). Same thing again, sad mews, weird licking, seemingly in pain. She wouldn't let me look in her mouth, which is weird because she usually doesn't care. \n\nMy boyfriend thinks she is teething, and that it is worse because she was orphaned at such a young age. Does anyone have any knowledge on this? We're taking her to the vet first thing in the morning, but I'm quite worried and am curious as to what you all think, since you've been so great in the past. Thank you!", "summary": "Kitten making sad sounds, pawing at her mouth, now is hiding under the couch. We suspect teething, but I'm still worried. What do you think?"}
{"id": "t3_2ogok8", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by looking at my boyfriend's phone", "post": "This just happened 20 minutes ago...  \n\nBackground: I've been dating my boyfriend for a year, on and off. I am 12 weeks pregnant this coming Monday. I thought my boyfriend was my best friend.  \n\nAnyway, prior to this fuck up I was having a good night with my boyfriend and some friends. We took a selfie. I asked him to send it to me, but he was intoxicated and forgot. Fast forward to him passing out at my house I grab his phone and go to his messages. I forward the selfie, but... I let curiosity get the best of me. Ended up reading a bunch of messages. Boy, I wish I hadn't...  \n\nNot only is he cheating on me, he flirts with multiple girls and he wishes a girl named \"Starr\" was his and in my place. His gallery is full of nudes he's been sent or saved from girls profiles on Facebook...  \n\nSo, I'm pregnant with his child and I'm fucking hurting. I'm back to questioning my insecurities when I was just getting over them. Yeah. I'd say I fucked up hard, guys.", "summary": "My eggo is preggo and I found out my so called \"bestfriend\" of 2 years and my boyfriend of a year is diddling multiple pooters and wish another girl was me instead"}
{"id": "t3_2v1fe6", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Tifu by getting thrown up on by a 10 year old boy", "post": "Tifu, and unlike many on here this actually happened today, about 2 hours ago. \n\nSo first a little background info: I'm a 17 year old boy with the large ambition of becoming an orthodontist. Lucky for me, I got a job as an orthodontic assistant; a job that I truly enjoy. However today, I experienced a 1st. \n\nWe were cementing in a palate expander on this young boy. We've had a bad experience with him gagging before while we were in his mouth, so we always tell his mother to avoid feeding him before appointments. So we get through the entire procedure without a hiccup, everything went extremely smooth. We start to sit him up in the chair. Now I don't know if it was the high speed that those dentist chairs incline at or what, but this boy began to vomit. He threw up on the floor, on the chair, in his lap.. All over the place. So, my first reaction is to go get a garbage bucket. I run and get it and hold it under him. Phew, at least it's all going in here.. But wait.. Projectile vomit! Before I had time to react both my forearms were covered in warm, chunky, what looked like vegetable stew. I froze. He froze. The Dr. froze. The little boy made eye contact with me, said he was sorry, and spit out a last little bit on my hand (for good measure). \n \nI got cleaned up, helped the Dr. clean up, and then went home took an hour long shower.\n\nIn the end, it was bad but I don't get too bothered by this kind of stuff so it could have been worse. And hey, I still wanna be an orthodontist. \n2/10, would not get thrown up on again.", "summary": "Tried being a good ortho assistant by holding the garbage for a puking patient. Ended up getting covered in puke."}
{"id": "t3_29092z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Did I [22/M] ruin my chances with her [21/F]? Could also use advice for a potential date with her.", "post": "I'm on my phone so sorry for any potential formating issues. \n\nI've been into a girl on my MA course for some time now. However, although my friends point out that she is into me and flirting, I never seem to notice it, and simply pass it off as her being friendly. \n\nEvery couple of weeks we go to a new restraunt together, and we have no problem filling our time together with laughs and conversation, but I'm concerned that they are just viewed as a friendship thing. Very little touching, for example, goes on. \n\nTonight we met up with some friends at another person's house to hang out. At the end of the night, as it was pouring down with rain, she said I could stay at hers. I've done this before and it's been pretty innocent. Although I was planning to, I realise I couldn't afford a ticket (she did say I could pay her back) back home so I said no. I'm worried she might take this as an out right rejection for any potential relationship. Did I fuck up by turning down the offer? \n\nShe is going home for a week tomorrow, and when she gets back, I've agreed to pick her up and we're going to a local city together. Does anyone have any tips on how to make this... Explicitly a date?", "summary": "Worried by turning down offer to stay over I ruined my chances. Need advice on how to make meet up like a date/maximise flirting."}
{"id": "t3_l4mtw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My grandfather went though my internet history, what should I do?", "post": "I live with my grandparents and my grandpa is especially intrusive in my life, like at work and who I date. But he has gone too far.\nHe took the laptop, opened Chrome (Its what I use) and went through ALL my history.\n\nHe went though facebook.\n\nHe went though Tumblr.\n\nHe went though Reddit.\n\nOh, he even went though my pay pal!\n\nWhat the fuck? \n\nDo I have no privacy?\n\nHe knows everything I have posted, what I have looked at, and what I do online. \n\nI open chrome and all the \"Top Pages\" are pages I have not been to in a few day (because I am so busy.) \n\nHe has seen all the crazy IAmAs and AskReddits I read. He more than likely went though my facebook messages. \n\nWhat should I do? Should I talk to him? Talk to my grandma? \n\nI already deleted my history and I have cleared out my computer files of \"questionable things\" (no, not porn, memes, I have memes.)\n\nI think he wanted to see if I deleted all the pictures of my ex boyfriend ~~***if you see this, go fuck yourself ;D***~~ and I did but I am kinda pissed.", "summary": "? My grandpa went though my internet shit and I am pissed. What to do? I am afraid he is now tracking me.***"}
{"id": "t3_40yzxm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] with my girlfriend [28F] Can't figure out what she sees in this guy", "post": "We have  been dating for 10 months. Everything has been just wonderful, we even moved in together last month. Last two month has be weird. Her \"ex aka good friend\" at lest that what she calls him. Have been spending alot of time together. I have not said anything yet, I don't want her to think I cant trust her. I have not seen or meet him. Not to long ago, she left her labtop open with facebook on. I looked at her messages and I see they are meeting at a coffee shop. Even weird hes black. I have never seen my gf show any interest in black guys, We don't even have any black friends ! Anyway Should I just straight up ask to hang or meet him ? like I really wanna know who this guy is and what hes up to with my gf. Like who the fuck stays friends with there ex?!", "summary": "My gf has been hanging out with her ex who she call her best friend and I have not meet him yet I don't wanna ask because I don't wanna look like I have trust issues"}
{"id": "t3_49wbf0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with this girl [21 F] I've been dating for 2 months. Can't seem to stay hard during sex. HELP! NSFW", "post": "Throwaway because it is kind of embarrassing. A little background first. I met this girl about 2 months ago at the bar. Got her number, hit it off, and have been talking everyday nonstop since. We both live in he same hometown but she goes to school somewhat far away form me so we dont see each other nearly as often as I would like. We make it work though. I really ended up liking this girl a lot more than I originally though. I think shes the most beautiful girl ive ever seen and I'm super attracted to her in every aspect.\n\nNow, heres the problem. I've had sex plenty of times so I'm pretty experienced. But about 2 weeks ago, I visited her and I tried having sex with her after a drunken night out . It was going great at first, but when it came time for the penetration, I just went soft. I wrote it off as being drunk and went to bed. The next day, I tried again when sober and again, I could not stay hard. She was understanding and says it happens. I'm already embarrassed at this point, but I dont really think about it too much. Later that night, i tried again (kinda drunk again) and I STILL COULDNT DO IT. Again, I wrote it off as being drunk, but now I just feel so nervous about it happening again. I've NEVER had this problem before. I just felt so nervous about it this time over any other time and I can't understand why I would feel that way, especially knowing that I've had great sex before. An important thing to note: she is the most beautiful girl ive ever been involved with and not to get into specifics, but her body is absolutely amazing. Maybe it has something to do with that? I don't really know. So what I really wanted to know is what I could do in order to make sure i stay hard during sex. Any pieces of advice? Ways to mentally prepare yourself? And i already know alcohol wont be used again, but still, maybe theres other things that can help out? Thanks!", "summary": "Couldn't stay hard after years of experience with sex. Is there any thing i can do to help calm my nerves and stay hard?"}
{"id": "t3_4z1cvj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23F] boyfriend [30M] is chipping away at my savings and my sanity.", "post": "I am 23 and my boyfriend (30) and I have been dating for a year, living together for most of the time. We get along wonderfully and he is so loving and nice to me. \n\nThe problem is that he is not very ambitious/career oriented and has had 4 jobs since we've been together (restaurants and construction) and many weeks of unemployment. I end up paying for more than my fair share out of my savings. This sometimes includes cigarettes, beer, weed. I pay for the car, car insurance, gas, cell phones, internet, etc. He seems to have the best intentions and hates that I do that, says he will make it up to me but it's been going on since the beginning.\n\nHe also has some issues mentally and it's getting hard for me to handle emotionally. He is depressed a lot and paranoid that people are against him. I want to help but don't want to put the burden on myself and he is very against medication/therapy.\n\nI don't know what to do. I am not sure I can handle much more but I would feel so bad if we broke up. He has nowhere to go (no car and lives with me and my mom) and no money. I also do really love him and he really loves me. I really just don't know whether I should keep trying?", "summary": "My boyfriend is great - but mentally and financially unstable. I don't know if I should try to deal with it anymore?"}
{"id": "t3_3dv8cm", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Me [M26] recently got a reasonably well paid job and would like some advice on how to save effectively", "post": "OK so I've never been good with money, it makes my toes curl to think I'm 26 years old and have earned circa \u00a3120,000 in my life and have literally nothing to show for it except a string of nasty hangovers and some cool stories. \n\nI recently got back from doing some charity work abroad and have landed a pretty well paid job. \u00a320,000 basic salary with uncapped commission. To put things into perspective I have cleared \u00a31975 commission this month and have already matched that for next month (commission is paid a month lying on).\n\nI do quite a lot of travelling and would love to see SE Asia, Australia and end up with my brother and his unborn son in NZ (if only for a few months) before I \"settle down\" and try to find a serious ladyfriend. \n\nIt's worth noting that I am in the UK and ideally want to be setting off in no longer than 18 months, am currently living with parents and have recently joined a gym, which I intend to take seriously (so I'm not as enticed to go out partying). All in all, without \"fun\" money I could put my outgoings at around \u00a3500 P/M. \n\nCould any of you please advise me what the best thing to do with the rest of my salary will be for such a short period of time? I am literally terrible when it comes to this, but at 26 I think it's high time I start to learn the ropes of personal finance.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Awful with money, now earning money and would like advice on how to maximise savings for the next 18 months."}
{"id": "t3_17cprm", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Considering leaving my job after ~6 months. Input, please?", "post": "I've got a bit of a dilemma on my hands and I'm not sure where to go with it.\n\nI graduated about a year ago with a bachelor's degree in Communication and I live in the Midwest. While that's typically not a great degree in this economy or this area, I've been employed by a very well-known and respected ad agency for a little over six months now. My internship in college was in NYC with one of the big TV news outlets. Not trying to be cocky, but I have a good resume for being a year out of school and I'm really, really trying to preserve it. \n\nI'm extremely thankful for being employed. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate where I'm at when I see so many on this subreddit suffering in unemployment. But I'm genuinely unhappy. I find advertising to be wholly unrewarding, soul-crushing and morally bankrupt. I sell unhappiness and consumerism for a living in a high-stress, low-pay environment and it's starting to affect who I am outside of work.\n\nWhen I first graduated I was trying to get back to NYC where I'd done my internship and now I'm really considering giving it a try once again. \n\nHowever, I've only been at this job for a little over 6 months and I'm worried that 1) it's going to make me look like a job jumper and 2) nobody will take me seriously. Maybe this shows my age and immaturity, but I know that if I got hit by a bus tomorrow I'd regret sitting in a cubicle for 50 hours a week and not going after a dream.\n\nHas anyone else had this experience? Any advice? Tough love?", "summary": "Trying to preserve a decent resume but leave a job after only 7 months and move to NYC. WTF do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4xbm26", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [M/22] don't know how to proceed with her [F/19]", "post": "So I had a good time the other night bonding with a friend I had a crush on. I knew that she was newly single and she had come over to hang out with me and some friends. We ended up alone together on the balcony talking about shared experiences until late at night. We had just finished a bottle between the both of us and I was feeling confident, so I went in for the kiss. We made out and I asked if she wanted to take this to my room once we broke for air. We proceeded to have sex and during the whole fiasco my condom had fallen off without me noticing and so I accidentally came inside her. We got plan B and everything and I apologized profusely. She said she didn't hate me or anything for it and that it was just a bad situation. I haven't talked to her for a few days after it. Should I just shoot her a text and start up casual conversation? Wait till she contacts me?", "summary": "Had drunken sex with a crush condom slipped off and I came inside her. Plan B was swiftly used, she said she doesn't hate me and now haven't talked to her in a few days"}
{"id": "t3_4v4wem", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Ex of my (19F) boyfriend (19M) is still trying to make herself relevant", "post": "My boyfriend had a year long somewhat meaningful relationship before me. They were in love and were actually still a little flirty while him and I started seeing each other. He cut it off (it being their \"friendship\") with her as soon as he realized I was deeply hurt by this and now we've been together for 5 months so she's been irrelevant for a while now. At least for me.  \n\nRecently I started noticing that she's still liking and commenting on his friends posts (some posts include my boyfriend and me)  on both Instagram and Twitter. None of his friends talk to her anymore because she's out of the picture. I've blocked her and so did my boyfriend but his friends haven't. So I'm still able to see whether she's liked posts or not. \n\nI've also noticed that she took her Instagram off private mode just to get under my boyfriends skin with posts of her with another guy whom my boyfriend and her have had problems with in the past. \nIt's been something that is irritating me because she's purposefully trying to get under our skin and it's working. Shes tweeted that she was over him but clearly she isn't. \n\nI don't know how to get over her bothering us and how to help my boyfriend also not be upset about her since she's irrelevant to our relationship. \n\nI'm not the type that's overly insecure but his ex has always made me feel like I'm in a competition to prove who's the best. For some reason I feel like I'm always in second place. Any thoughts?", "summary": "Ex of my boyfriend is still trying to make herself relevant by liking and commenting on his friend's Instagram and Twitter posts who don't talk to her anymore"}
{"id": "t3_x4k90", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I want to share her this badly?", "post": "Married for seventeen years M:42, F:39\n\nBeen waiting for Wife to loosen up a bit sexually and get more adventurous over that time....had one or two MMF with her that were, in short, the highlights of my entire life - but these were exceptions rather than the rule, despite her really enjoying them. That was five or six years ago now, and these days she has no interest in this sort of thing, which has left me pining more and more so that it has become something I brood on every day.\n\nNot interested in other women outside of the novelty factor, or doing this sort of thing more than once or twice a year - and I don't want a threesome so badly that I'd go elsewhere (if it doesn't involve her, what's the point? It's all about spoiling her and so on), and most importantly I still love her more than anything else in the world - so what can I do? I'm slowly becoming ill with the stress, something that makes me feel ridiculous when there are other people in the world who have *real* problems....but at the same time, I can't believe I've fallen into the 'if only my Wife was this dirty' trap that I swore I'd avoid as a youngster. We have one life, and mine is disappering in a cloud of wishing things were different...and I don't want to grow bitter and twisted to the point that she (and our kids) suffer....I''m worried that this has started to happen already.\n\nSorry if this is all a bit rambly, never done anything like this before and haven't discussed it with anyone. Not sure what'll come out in my replies!", "summary": "My life is fantastic, my family is great, so why am I hung up on having more MMF's with the wife?"}
{"id": "t3_2uy98p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] of eight months has a very awkward problem that's creating undue tension.", "post": "This is utterly bizarre, so the internet's the only place I can really discuss something like this. The only other person to discuss this with has a *conflict-of-interest* (you'll see why).\n\nMy first 2 relationships were very vanilla. In my third, I met a guy who was insanely attractive and this made me more confident in sex in general. He was interested in anal, I was not. Eventually, he convinced me to overcome my hangups. Just a couple of weeks after we started exploring, he broke up with me.\n\nCue my current bf. Been dating for six months, but technically know him for longer. Comfortable enough to share my history and bring up this fact. Tell him I'm interested. I thought he would be *delighted!* To my shock, he dismisses it. Calls it unnecessary and a \"little too erotic\" in his words. WTF?!!\n\nThen there's the prankster of a friend I know. He's male. NBD. He's gay, so my exes haven't gotten jealous. He buys me this nice metal plug. Partly as a fun prank, partly because he knows I might enjoy it. Again, NBD. I bought him a pair of leather cuffs because I know his major fetish is being handcuffed. We buy each other sexual gifts.\n\nCue my bf again. Hears this. Is absolutely livid. Refuses to talk to me for 24 hrs. Then, remains cold. Says he loves me for everything I've done so far but I'm pushing his limits and apparently making him uncomfortable.\n\nSays he doesn't want anything to do with this and if I respect him I would have nothing to do with it to. Now, I'm pissed. I sorta enjoyed the new sensations and the adrenaline rush of doing something naughty. I started to fantasize sneaking around with it. Surprising my bf. It's not going to fly. I am kinda pissed of. And sad. I also now am starting to think of other instances where he isn't comfortable with how comfortable I am. Me overthinking? Help.", "summary": "I am a little more sexually open than he is and he is not allowing me to explore *my own* body. Find this incredibly unfair. How do we resolve this?"}
{"id": "t3_3943bt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [23] wants me [25] to move in with her, but I don't feel ready..", "post": "Hey everyone, so as the title states, my girlfriend and I have been dating for only 5 months and she has been talking about moving in together. It has gotten so serious that she has inquired on seeing apartments. I'll smile and agree as to not hurt her feelings, but I definitely don't feel ready.\n\n Not only that, I also feel as if this relationship is going way too fast and that her and I are on completely different levels. Don't get me wrong, I love the girl, she's awesome; I just think she's invested in this relationship a bit more than I am. \n\nShe had a boyfriend of 6 years before me, where as my longest relationship has been a year, the rest of the time I just did casual dating. AKA this serious relationship is out of the ordinary for me. I still find my self interested in other people (obviously not acting on my impulses) which is making this \"taking things to the next step\" quite hard.\n\nAny advice as how I can approach this situation? I don't want to lose her, but I also don't want her to be wasting her time with me, if in fact I am not ready for a serious girlfriend right now.\n\nI might also mention that we live around an hour apart. Which makes seeing each other not as simple as it could be. \n\nI just feel as if I'm at a crosswords, I'd definitely appreciate another perspective on the matter. Thanks in advance.", "summary": "Girlfriend wants to move in together, I'm not quite ready..feel as if were on different levels in this relationship, not sure what I should do."}
{"id": "t3_13j7t1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is love enough to make a relationship work?", "post": "My boyfriend and I love each other very much, but love is pretty much all we've got that works.  Well, we also get along very well.  But other than that it feels like it is all obstacles between us.  \n\nWe are long distance now because we are both academics and living the \"two-body problem.*\"  We not only live far from each other, but far from our families that rely on us both for a lot of help -- and they will only become more reliant on us over time.  (For me, the responsibility is taking care of my ailing and elderly parents (I'm an only child), for him it is his impoverished widowed mother and very sick brother).  Top that with the fact that we have to work like maniacs around our numerous visits to each other and to our families to stay afloat in our very competitive careers.  \n\nI could give up my work, but I am so close to a breakthrough in my research and it is on a treatment for a disease that is such a terrible scourge, I feel I can't leave it.  Plus, being a scientist is not just what I do, it is what I am. This isn't like being a carpenter and I can just built a workshop in the basement and keep going with it.  I would be miserable without my research, and not the woman he fell in love with anymore.\n\nCan this possibly ever work out?", "summary": "BF and GF (me) love each other and get along well, but the rest of life looks like love might not be enough to keep us together."}
{"id": "t3_33yjqc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M/25] have been dating a co worker [F/27] for 6 months and our boss [M/48?] made a pass at her.", "post": "Like I said we have been dating each other for about 6 months. We have kept our relationship a secret so it doesn't effect our work life. We also have an amazimg relationship and it only gets complicated when she has to tell me what to do at work which is very rare since we work in different areas of the store. \n\n3 weeks ago we got a new boss. He is a 48 year old who is extremely overweight, is a little sexist, he is bald and has long nose hair and ear hair etc. But overall he gets things done even though we all agree he is a bit to full on. \n\nOver the weekend both my SO and our boss had to work. We work in retail so weekends are normal for us. The boss was complaining about the safe over text to my SO and jokingly she said its the big gray square thing. His reply was \"i think its time for a spanking\" we both sat up in bed in shock. I mean we both knew he stared at my SOs ass but we didn't think it would go this far. My SO was very shocked. She didnt know what to say, so I told her to tell him how inappropriate it was so he didn't do it again. She told me she didn't want to say anything because he is so full on at work that she is scared he will try to get rid of her. I was upset that she didn't say anything.  To me her silence was telling him that what he said was ok. But i understood why she said nothing. We ended up arguing about it, we made up etc. But its still weird being around this guy. I already wanted to hit him before this all went down. I won't hit him just fyi. She told me if he keeps doing it she will say something.  \n\nSo what would you do in this situation? Being in my situation and being in my SOs situation.", "summary": "My boss told my SO who is also a co worker that he wants to spank her over text. What would you do if you were in our situations?"}
{"id": "t3_doovr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Idea's for an extremely un-orthodox/non-traditional wedding?", "post": "Nothing so crazy we couldn't invite our grammas, but we definitely want to do something different.  We both hate damn near everything about traditional American weddings (except the cake, cake is always good). But neither of us is religious, we don't want kids and we've been living together as a couple for several years, so the wedding doesn't really mean much to us. \n\nWe've already made the commitment to each other, we don't really care about the symbolism of a ceremony.\n\n The only reason we're even *having* a wedding is because the families have said they'd be crushed if they couldn't see us get married. But they claim they don't care what we do as long as they get to attend. So we've been trying to come up with the weirdest/craziest/funniest way to get married. But CHEAP. We're not rich, we're paying for everything ourselves and we'd rather put money towards a house.\n\nAny ideas?", "summary": "Families making fiancee and me have a wedding, we don't want one. Need ideas for something non-traditional and fun."}
{"id": "t3_1lhbe2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me, [20/f] need advice on whether or not to give up on this boy I've been interested in [21/m] for a few months.", "post": "About five months ago, I was invited to a friends house for beer pong and when I showed up I instantly noticed this adorable boy who was just smiling at me. I literally knew right then that I was interested, and throughout the night we would pick on each other/flirt and the same thing occurred every time we ran into eachother. He's a virgin, and has had only one girlfriend before, in high school. \n\nA few months after meeting, I tweeted \"I need a Pisces\" and he responded saying \"I'm a Pisces, js\". I was so excited about it and we've texted a few times and hangout with his best friend and girlfriend, who happens to be one of my best friends. One night we were messing around and playing and we ended up holding hands kind of and he fell asleep. \n\nHowever, he's pretty awkward and seems like he doesn't know how to make a move. I've made it pretty obvious I'm interested and nothing really has happened. But I know if we ever got past this awkward stage we would have something great, help!", "summary": "I have a crush on a virgin who doesn't know how to make moves on a girl and I don't know how to move forward."}
{"id": "t3_4brqtd", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Medical Bill Help", "post": "So I'm new to reddit so please be kind! My boyfriend suggested I ask for help here.\n\nBackground - about a year ago I was in a bad car accident (rear ended a semi on the freeway doing 60mph because he cut me off). Well I'm paying monthly to multiple places, hospitals & doctors, for the exams and tests I had done.\n\nI went to the dentist for my checkup and was told that I need a root canal and crown but my insurance covers almost nothing - I would still need to pay $1200+ out of pocket. I cannot afford this on my income currently.\n\nI have a credit card that I use for small purchases and pay off every month, would it be a smart idea to get another credit card with lower interest rate put my dental work on it and then pay it off monthly?\n\nOr is there a better solution I'm missing? I have tried care credit and they won't approve me :(", "summary": "i need $1200+ dental work. Is putting it on a credit card and paying monthly a good idea or is there another solution?"}
{"id": "t3_3b8r8y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20m] My girlfriend [21f] of two months has told me that she has hooked up with guys in the past. This puts some strain on my otherwise strong feelings for her. How should I deal with this?", "post": "We have been friends for a couple years, and this information came up a while before we started dating, simply in conversation as friends.  She is an amazing girl and I am completely head over heels for her.  She makes me smile all the time, accepts my weirdness while owning hers, is fine being bored with me - the list goes on.  Despite all this, sometimes the thought of her hooking up with someone really bothers me, and I hate that something from her past would get to me so much when there are no other issues in our relationship.\n \nI know that she has had long term relationships ( > 1 year) in the past, and I have no issue at all with any aspect of that part of her life.  To me anything that happens in a relationship is fine, but I  have a hard time coming to terms with sexual relations happening before being in a relationship, or before feeling certain that a relationship will soon form.  \n\nI'm worried that if I bring up that it's bothering me, I'll mar our otherwise pristine relationship.  Preferably, I'd like input to help me learn how to accept her past and be happy with what we have now.  However, I'd also welcome suggestions on how to have a healthy conversation about it if the thought continues to bother me.", "summary": "I am bothered that my gf has had hook-ups in the past.  How can I accept this or talk to her about this to maintain our otherwise great relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_1jk37z", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "FWB relationship got too serious and we will be in the same class in a few weeks. How to deal?", "post": "A little background: I (M 31) met up with a woman my age a few months ago in a class we were taking in preparation for going to the university (yes, a bit late for both of us, different topic). We got along *really* well and she ended up confessing to me and we became a couple. There was a catch: She is married and they have a kid, but her husband is abusive and she has been planning on leaving him. Because I didn't want to be a \"pulling factor\" on her relationship more than I already was, we agreed on keeping it FWB.\n\nObviously we fell head over heels for eachother, though her moreso than I, I think. Yesterday she started fishing for what I would do if I could choose and if it was up to me, and I suspect she wanted me to say she should leave her husband. I said that ideally, I wish she managed to get things working with her husband and for their kid's sake, and maybe I could find someone who could measure up to her. Perharps not the most elegant way of putting it, but it's what I said in the moment as I still thought we were keeping it casual FWB. It was then it became more apparent how attached to me she was as she was absolutely devastated.\n\nA second catch: We have both signed up for a year-long class this year, related to the one we met in. It's too late for any of us to change or go to a different place.\n\nHonestly I would be fine just distantiating myself while being around her. I care for her a lot but have managed to keep it FWB and would be fine degrading it to just friends again. It's different for her though. She's still in tears every time she calls me, says it's best if she never sees me again, how nobody wants her, and gets upset at the notion of staying friends since it's no cure for her broken heart.", "summary": "FWB with a married woman turned too serious and she doesn't want to see me, we have a one year long class lined up together."}
{"id": "t3_1duj4a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I stop being insensible?", "post": "I've recently been told that I [18M] am insensible. I don't really know what that means, because I always think that I show that I care or something. This girl [18F] I have been dating for around 4 months just told me that I am insensible, and that I don't even know her or try to know her, that I don't even know how to make her laugh. I am so lost. I don't know what to do. help me? I know that this isn't enough information but there are lots of other things/factors. I just don't know what the important or more notable ones are.", "summary": "What does being insensible really mean? it just doesn't make sense to me. I feel like i'm doing everything i can to make her feel special but it turns out i'm doing the opposite."}
{"id": "t3_jsmzf", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I looked at the past comments of this girl who follows the subreddit for my small town. We have a lot in common and I want to ask her out. Am I a creep???", "post": "male/22\n\nI was on the subreddit for my town (it has 16 followers :/ ) and this person made a relevant comment and had a feminine name. She goes to my university since the OP referenced it in the title. I just got out of two long relationships that started from friends setting me up, and I think it would be nice to change it up and try and date a redditor.\n\nI looked at her past comments and found out we have a lot in common. I feel like a creep, but from how she describes herself on reddit... she seems like one of those girls that only come by once in a blue moon. Do you have any advice on how I could search her out in RL non-creepily? I feel like PM'ing her on reddit and asking her to get a drink would be weird. Or should I forget it and try the bar scene?", "summary": "I noticed a female from my school commented on my post, searched her past comments and have an e-crush on her. Am I a creep for wanting to ask her out?"}
{"id": "t3_3e94fs", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My ex (F/21) is confusing me (M/22).", "post": "About 4 years ago at the end of High School i had a wonderful (~year) relationship with a wonderful person (we'll call her D). Easily the best relationship ive ever had, i still have never been able to enjoy someone as much as i enjoyed D, i believe that feeling was genuinely mutual throughout the relationship. Towards the end of our fantastic relationship things began to just sort of fizzle out, which ended up with a lot of accusations and arguments, but ultimately no residual issues, Here we are 4 years later, ive only had a single serious relationship since D, i would definitely say ive moved on, but i dont think i will be ever able to forget the happiness i had when i was with her.\n\nHere is the confusing part, every so often we get in contact with each other again. Only once have we actually ended up hanging out and that was a business transaction a few years back. Somehow one of us about once a year will message the other one in attempts to say something yet nothing really gets conveyed. id almost call our conversations just 2 nervous people forcing themselves to communicate\n\nAgain, yesterday she messages me, im not sure if this was a fueled conversation or what but as bad as i am with women, i even thought she might be attempting to... reconnect? I also know that i hyper-analyze everything and im just trying to think nothing of it\n\nScreenshot of the conversation\n\na sidenote: when it comes to women and identifying emotional/sexual/physical ques i am positively horrific at it. i constantly confuse being flirty with being nice.", "summary": "my ex and i converse randomly every so often, i have a hunch we both want to reconnect but idk, she messaged me yesterday"}
{"id": "t3_hji1u", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the worst way you've been misunderstood?", "post": "Here's mine: Last summer Starcraft 2 came out; I had been waiting for over half a decade to play it. Early in the afternoon I biked as fast as I could to Bestbuy, grabbed a copy and began the two mile bike ride home. I'm the kind of person who only owns long sleeve shirts and long pants, so I was getting pretty hot at this point, but I knew it didn't matter because I was about to experience a game I'd waited years for...\n\nAs soon as I got home I rushed inside, sweaty and panting, and ripped open the box. As I was reading through the manuals I thought to myself \"No one's home, might as well take off my clothes to cool down.\" I quickly got comfortable on the couch, pants around my ankles, and was reading through the various booklets from the packaging with nerdy glee. \n\nAs it turned out, a friend of mine had gotten the game too (collector's edition) and had brought it over to show me. He knocked on the door directly across from the couch. This door has a stained glass pane in it.\n\nTo this day he makes fun of me for fapping to the Starcraft 2 manual.", "summary": "I took off my clothes to cool off after a bike ride and my friend thought I was fapping to Starcraft 2."}
{"id": "t3_1b3p4q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How the *Hell* do I (23M) tell if I'm in love with her? (19F)", "post": "We've been dating since early December. She loves me. A lot. It's the giddy, clear light in her eyes when she looks into mine that let's me know.  When she says those three words, she *means it.*  I'm older than her, and more than just chronologically.  She was a virgin, I wasn't by a long shot.  Neither of us are terribly experienced in the relationship game, though I've had my fair share of utter disasters.  One real long-term relationship, and a couple of spectacular failures.  She's had a good life, and I, well, it's been weird.  She's definitely known pain, but she's been *happy* in a way that I've never experienced.  Blah blah mental illness, pills, therapy, hospitalization, etc.\n\nWhen I look at her, I feel content in a way that is completely alien to me.  The ever-present anger and fear and twisted up sadness kind of melt away when she nuzzles my neck, and it's fucking terrifying.  I'm so, so scared to be in love with her, and if I am, it's the most *bizarre* thing I've ever experienced.  It's like being high.  I hate being high.  Gah.\n\nSo, my questions:  How do you know if you're in love?  And what do you do if that's the most frightening thing you can think of?  Do I stick it out, or do I run away?  I don't want to hurt her.  I could use some advice.", "summary": "I have no idea what I'm doing in a relationship, scared of myself, scared of her, scared I'm going to fuck her up, but she's the first thing to make me happy in as long as I can remember."}
{"id": "t3_509ny2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 21f with my 21m bf, how do I know this is love", "post": "so I don't know where to start.this is on mobile so pardon any spelling errors.\n\nBackground: me and tom have been dating for a little over a year.i come from a traditional family where dating is usually frowned upon within the culture. Me and Tom have been friends for 4 years but I finally gave in and went on a date because frankly I liked him a lot. This December tom will have to move across country because he has gotten an amazing job after his graduation. I'm stuck here because I will be continuing my grad school on this state(got accepted in my dream school!!)  so the issue is we don't know what to do\n\nWhen talking about our future I suddenly began to feel panicked. I mean when I think about Tom I can see an amazing,loving future in which I will be genuinely happy. Yet,one part of me is freaking out.how do I know this is love?ive never been in a relationship before so I've never experienced anything in comparison! Will a LDR ruin us? The busy schedules will make it difficult for us to talk in addition to the little to no in person interaction.what if we become resentful of each other?what if he would rather want someone else?what if he doesn't actually love me?how can I be sure he is \"the one\"?i believe he is but...\n\nMy idea of love is very warped. I have this funny paradigm of love(I can explain further if you'd like) .my ideas of love were adopted from an early age where my only examples came from the movies. The sheltered part of me is ignoring my happiness and kind of freakin out because there's no way to be sure he's the main love interest of my life like in the movies", "summary": "me and bf are happy but will have to enter a ldr soon. Should we pursue long distance or take a break?how do I know how to make the right decision"}
{"id": "t3_1hmirt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M/20] dont know how to bring up my personal problems with my aunt [F/50] and need some guidance.", "post": "Well, im having problems with my horrendously hyperactive sex drive, insecurities, and emotions. Dealing with all 3 really leaves me in a mess, and sometimes I quietly cry my eyes out into my pillow as a result.\n\nBeing sexually gifted in lots of ways and having no outlet for it creates an insane amount of sexual frustration and jealousy, to the point that im bawling like tonight. It makes me feel extremely jaded towards others and resentful towards those closest to me, and I know its not how I should feel.\n\nI can only trust my aunt because my mom has schizophrenia and my grandma is a hateful, abusive person. How should I bring this up? Should I bring this up? How can I solve my problem?", "summary": "SEX DRIVE, SEXUAL JEALOUSY, AND SEXUAL FRUSTRATION IS KILLING ME. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO."}
{"id": "t3_3q4yq3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting my fingers dirty.", "post": "Only moments ago, I opened the door to go inside my house from the backyard, where I'd just finished smoking a cig. The lights are all off.\n  \n As I walk past the kitchen table towards my room, I see my cat trying to get onto it from one of it's chairs. I scratch her once behind the ears, and gently start pushing her off. She quickly ducks beneath my hand, and keeps peering over the surface of the table at something. \n  \nI see what looks like a single piece of popcorn in the darkness. I pick it up, and what I grab is crunchy, but much softer than popcorn. I flip on a light and saw that I had just squashed the biggest moth i'd ever seen in person right between my thumb and forefinger. Not a huge fuck up, but still. Gross.", "summary": "Poor lighting led me to killing a huge moth with my bare fingers. Alternatively, TIFU by stealing a kill from my cat."}
{"id": "t3_2xhw62", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Two guys [22/M] [20/M] like me [21/F]. What do I do?", "post": "I'm used to being ignored by the opposite gender. Suddenly it has come to my attention that two of my guy friends like me.\n\nOne, Jake [20/M], is actually my ex. He and I tried to be in a relationship twice before, it ended on semi-bad terms, but we've rebuilt our friendship greatly to the point we have discussed getting back together.\n\nThe other, Matt [22/M], was there for me when the last relationship ended, and is an overall great guy. I can actually tell that a couple of our mutual friends are implying that we should get together.\n\nA mutual friend of Jake and I is also implying that we should get back together.\n\nI like both of these guys in their own way. I don't want to be leading them on.\n\nDo I choose one or the other? Or do I just cut them both off? What types of things should I be taking into consideration?\n\nI'll answer any questions you may have to give insight into the situation.", "summary": "Two of my friends like me. One I've dated, the other I haven't. What do I do/what should I consider in this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_3b6man", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [19M] confront her [19F]?", "post": "So my best girlfriend stopped talking to me a couple of months ago. Because I apparently \"lied\" to her about something which is not true. However, recently she just appeared out of nowhere wanting us to be friends again. \n\nI told her that I wanted to talk with her first, and so we did. I agreed that we could be friends again, or at least work towards rebuilding our friendship. She was quite enthusiastic about it, so I thought it was worth giving it a shot. \n\nA week later I asked her to hang out at some place we used to hangout a lot. And now even though she does appear really friendly via text she doesn't make the effort to hangout. Using an excuse that she is busy, while college is over for the semester so she has plenty of time. \n\nWell, now I feel like she just wanted to be friends again so she doesn't have to feel \"awkward\" around me. We have also many mutual friends so we see each other occasionally, and I invite those friends to my place to hangout. I think she wants to be a part of that as well, so I guess it's like using my friendship to gain those advantages without having to anything for it.\n\nNow I feel like confronting her. Should I or shouldn't I? I want to tell her that I don't want to hangout at that place anymore, because she doesn't make the effort to set a date. And that she was the one who wanted to be friends again, so that it is her that should make the effort of strengthening our relationship. Right now I feel like this friendship is going nowhere if she doesn't put any effort in it. \n\nShould I confront her? Or just see where this is going?", "summary": "Best girl friend appears out of the blue after disappearing for a few months. Wants to be friends again, but doesn't put any effort in it. Should I confront her?"}
{"id": "t3_471832", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my Ex [19F] 6/7 months, How do i let go ? How do i move on ?", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nI met this Girl once on a NCS (National Citizen Service) basically a camp for teen-agers. 1st two weeks are holiday the other 2 its community service.So i ended up getting something nice on my CV.\n\nHowever this isn't about NCS , this is about a girl I met there. Before NCS I was super shy,lacked confidence and just the usual teen issues.\n\nI met a girl, i managed to fight of my fears and spoke to her, we seemed to hit it off quite well. 1 and a half weeks into knowing her I asked her out , knowing that i'm probably not the only one attracted to her.\n\nWe ended up having a pretty healthy relationship but we did rush into a lot of the couple stuff. \n\nAfter 6 months something happened and she didn't want to be with me anymore. We did live about 45 minutes / an hour from each other , and we were attending college at the time so we didn't see each other as much as we would've liked.\n\nAfter multiple attempts to reach out to her and convince her that we made a mistake I kind of gave up. So here we are today still talking to each other, as friends.\n\nIt has been over a year and a half since we have broken up , but I still cannot get over her.\n\nHave any of you gone through a bad break up and had a bad time letting go ?\n\nIf you would like to know more about my situation feel free to pm me.", "summary": "Met a girl, thought/think i fell in love , we broke up, cant get over her, she doesn't want to be any more than friends."}
{"id": "t3_2g5382", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Hey reddit, so i have a little problem", "post": "Hey reddit, so i have a little problem. I'm not sure if this is the right sub but I'm just going to leave it here. I was driving home from school today and this car in front of me stopped short and I had to slam on my breaks. So what did my Idiot self decide to do tail gate this car for the next 15-20 seconds. I eventually back off after I cool down and everything is ok for the next couple of minutes. However, as we both approach a red light with the other car making a left and myself making right, as I passed her she honked her horn at me a couple times. Now this normally would not be an issue for me as I like to consider myself a level headed person. But once again in the heat of the moment I honked back a couple times and proceeded to give the middle finger out of the window. As I look back to see if the driver of the car get gotten the message, the car drives up next to me and rolls down the window. As I begin to ponder the possible things that I am going to say after the window is rolled down I suddenly realize that it is a teacher at the school that I attend. She says to me and my friend who is sitting besides me, \"DO YOU WANNA SAY SOMETHING TO ME?!?!?!\" I then look at my friend who is scared beyond belief. The cars in front of us began to move at this point and all i said was \"No were good\" and drove off. Now I am pretty sure she does not know who I am, but my friend has her as a teacher for one of his classes. I am trying to figure out what I am going to do sort this all out tomorrow. I am leaning to going up to her and apologizing but I just wanted to get some input from a site that I have seen so many others before me. Sorry for the long post.", "summary": "Tail gate and Flip off car on drive back from school. Turns out to be teacher from my school. PLZ HELP!!"}
{"id": "t3_2pzoju", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with ex [22 M] - reconnecting for about 1 month, feeling an imbalance in our dynamic", "post": "Apologies for any formatting issues as I'm on mobile.  I've recently reconnected with an old ex of mine from back in high school. We've both changed significantly over the last 7 years, to the point where we have a very different kind of relationship now than before. I would say that I've become a lot more open minded and less critical of things he's interested in, and he's become less self centered and more considerate of others, which makes us more compatible than before.\n\nHowever - we are both well aware that I am further along on my \"life path\" (aka I am already almost 2 years into my career while he's still finishing his degree) and this adds a strange dynamic to our relations.  In addition, he is constantly complimenting me and telling me how awesome and beautiful I am, etc.  I would say this ends up being about 50% of our conversations.  \n\nDon't get me wrong, I like being appreciated - but for some reason I haven't been able to fully describe, I feel uncomfortable, like there's an imbalance.  I expressed this to him and he basically just said that he's so impressed and infatuated and \"wants to treat me like the angel I am.\"  \n\nThis is such a weird thing for me to be feeling off about and I'm wondering if someone can help me put into words what's making me feel uncomfortable so I can express it to him and hopefully figure this out.  Thanks in advance!", "summary": "Reconnecting in the last month with an ex from high school, he is putting me on a pedestal and is always complimenting me, I'm feeling uncomfortable for reasons I can't quite formulate into words."}
{"id": "t3_14g72t", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How do I ask a girl to be my girlfriend?", "post": "So me and this girl have been talking and hanging out for a long time now, maybe 3 - 4 months. I've been scared to make a move and we traded phones and read eachothers texts and she says she doesn't like how i'm such a virgin (I am a virgin and i'm scared to make a move). Anyways she told one of my friends she wanted me to ask her out. So what is a good clever way to ask her out. Also should I say \"will you go out with me\" or \"will you be my girlfriend\" or something else? P.s. I'm 18 (m) shes 17 (f)", "summary": "I'm scared to make any moves even though she wants it and she wants a relationship. How do i ask her out?"}
{"id": "t3_2yxx63", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I am currently a SAHM and my husband [30/m] seems to expect me to do all the housework -is this fair?", "post": "I am a stay at home mom right now (not a permanent thing) with two kids not in school yet.  I breastfeed and am up 2 -3 times during the night with the children.  I never get a full night sleep.  My husband works long shifts five days a week, and leaves for work early so he has 20-30 minutes of personal time before work.  By the time he gets home, they are both asleep.\n\nHe has recently stopped doing chores and seems to expect me to do them all.  For chores, I had asked him to take out the garbage (I get it together and leave it near the door) and to wash/dry the laundry.  I said I would fold.  We don't have laundry in our unit and the garbage is a short walk, and it's a huge inconvenience trying to carry the kids and a laundry pail or garbage bags -especially given the ice, snow and cold.  He usually cooks once or twice a week but makes a mess and doesn't wipe down the stove or clean the pots. I have talked to him before, and he says he just forgets sometimes.   \n\nI know as a stay at home mom I should take on most of the housework, and have decided to start using a cleaning schedule so it doesn't seem so overwhelming, but I really feel like he needs to help more.  I just don't know what is fair to ask.  I need to sit down and talk to him since he isn't doing anything, and am wondering if it's okay to ask him to help out with more than those two things.  For now, with two at home, breastfeeding, and taking care of feeding/diapers at night, what do you think is an appropriate split?  I feel clueless.", "summary": "Husband not helping with housework.  Going to talk to him about it and am wondering what is fair to ask of him since he works full time?"}
{"id": "t3_2h98gc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my [21F] GF, trying to decipher a situation and whether it's cheating.", "post": "Hey all. So, my girlfriend of a little over a year and I have been going fairly well throughout the last few months at University. However, the past few weekends I've been out of town so she hasn't had too much to do for fun. She has been hanging out with one of her new friends from one of her classes, let's call him Ted. \n\nTed and my GF have been texting, snapchatting, everything, which I don't have a problem with because as long as nobody gets the wrong idea about a friendship I'm not going to tell her how to live her life. \n\nHowever, when I was coming home one Sunday evening, she had been sporadically texting me all evening. I get a text around 8:30 (I'd gotten home around 7) saying that she's hanging out with her roommates and that she'll come over to my place soon so we can hang out. \n\nI then don't hear from her until 8:30 the following morning, and I had been calling and texting her throughout the night trying to get some sense of what she was doing. She doesn't mention anything of it, and apologizes. \n\nWell previously, after a discussion, I pried out of her that she wasn't with her roommates and she invited Ted back to her room after they got dinner together, all of which was taking place while I was already home. \n\nAfter more discussion, it turns out that they were on her bed together, while he was playing her guitar, and they ended up holding hands before she drove him home around 1:30.\n\nAll of this she would have never told me had I not insisted on having all the accurate information. She insists that nothing other than hand holding happened. \n\nIs this considered cheating? I feel as if I've been cheated on, at least emotionally, in that I feel completely disrespected and betrayed. Any thoughts or comments would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "GF of a year invites friend from class into her room alone without my knowledge and holds hands with him before driving him home late at night. Is this cheating/how do I handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_1syobv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend [22F] broke up with me [24M] out of nowhere, could she be cheating on me?", "post": "She and I have been going out for three months. She has a lot of friends, whereas I'm very introverted and a loner. From the beginning, she's always hung out with a lot of guy friends and even told me that they kept trying to have sex with her. I'm not a jealous person, so I wasn't disturbed by it. After a month of dating, she admitted that she fooled around with one of her old friends (neck kissing, fondling, first base stuff) and told me she'd never do it again. I wasn't overly upset about it because I was glad she was honest. Since then, there haven't been any other issues.\n\nThis morning, she broke up with me out of the blue. No explanation, except that she wanted to keep things *exactly* the way they were but just drop the title of a relationship. I thought things were going really well for us and I really like this girl. I kept asking her why she wanted us to break up and she wouldn't tell me. I asked if it was because she wanted to see other people but she insisted I was the only guy she liked and wanted to be intimate with. So what gives? Why break up then?\n\nIs it possible that she was cheating on me/planned to? I'm so fucking confused right now and she won't offer me any sort of explanation. I don't know what to do. I mean, if she did sleep with another dude she could just tell me like she told me last time.. I wouldn't have flipped out on her. I don't understand why she wouldn't tell me, so she probably wasn't cheating on me right? But why the mixed signals and everything? Jesus Christ.", "summary": "Girlfriend wants to break up but keep everything the same between us. Insisted she's not trying to explore her options and only wants to be with me. What should I do right now? I feel stuck."}
{"id": "t3_2kira8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28M] with my wife [28F] of 1yr, have issues delegating tasks to her.", "post": "I have issues delegating (what I consider) pretty simple tasks to my wife. My schedule is pretty busy with work and I find myself asking her to do things like 1) go down to the HOA to talk about an issue that we both understand, 2) get ink cartridges refilled at Costco the next time she makes a trip, 3) get herself enrolled in a local junior college to take classes that she wants to take (she asked me for help getting started and I guided her to the online application, class schedule, etc), 4) fill out (or at least do the parts she can) her immigration paperwork, 5) make doctor's appointments and follow-ups.\n\nA lot of my impatience comes from me feeling like she's not putting in her best effort. I feel like I'm working with an uncooperative co-worker that doesn't know how to make a clean hand-off when they need help, and do it themselves when they don't need help. Everything I ask her to help out in doing, I end up spending more time in scattered (trivial) questions or helping with things out she can easily figure out by using Google. It's also personally very frustrating dealing with ineffectual people, and especially frustrating when there is a failure to complete necessary tasks to live.\n\nI know that she never paid a bill in her life before we got together, i.e., she didn't have much of the procedural skill set needed to survive. It seems like it could just be an avoidance/lack of confidence in doing these things. How can I help with this?\n\nI don't get what the problem is, because she puts in a lot of effort to take care of the domestic needs of our home and does a great job at it. It also doesn't seem like it'd be asking too much as she doesn't work and doesn't seem overloaded with what she does at home. She definitely isn't lazy.", "summary": "Can't seem to get my wife to help out with anything other than home-tasks and don't know what the problem is. What's wrong and how can I help fix it?"}
{"id": "t3_11v8sr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need to make money and fast. Reddit what are your best fast money making schemes?", "post": "I'm a newly single mother of 3. I am behind in rent, my vehicle isn't insured right now due to lack of money, our cable and Internet will be canceled within the next few days, and every other bill is now behind due to lack of money. I'm doing what I can with what I can but quickly realizing that I'm drowning. I have been looking for a new and higher paying job for months, with no success (though I have a lot of experience to provide). Reddit, what can I do to help keep my family afloat? I need to make more money and fast!", "summary": "single mom of 3 is drowning in bills and needs to make money now. I will not whore myself out so don't suggest!"}
{"id": "t3_225yef", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm a spare bank baby, anybody else out here like me? How do you feel about it", "post": "I have a mom a dad and two brothers, my dad IS my dad, he raised me and both my brothers, but he is not our biological father. Because he is infertile he and my mom decided to find sperm donor's as close to a match as him and have my mom artificially inseminated. They used a different donor for the each of us, and it was all anonymous, so we will never have the chance of knowing who our bio dad's are, jjust that they are about 5\"8' Irish heritage, and dark hair. I don't want anything from my bio dad, I'd just like to meet him find out if we're alike, get important info like family health history etc, but sadly there doesn't seem to be a possibility of that. But instill love my dad, and he has always been there for me, so it's not like I'm bitter about not knowing my dad, because I do. Anybody else in a similar situation? Have you heard of any way to maybe find out more info on your bio dad?  are you angry at all?", "summary": "my dad isn't my biological dad and I'll probably never meet him because he was an anonymous sperm donor, anybody else like me?"}
{"id": "t3_1dwp1c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19m] and my girlfriend [19f] recently broke up, I dont want it to end.", "post": "Me and this girl were dating for around 3 weeks and things were going really well until I had a crazy as hell week at work that put me over the ringer. I had also just received some bad news from my doctor aswell about my health, so needless to say, my mind was in shambles. During the 4th week of our relationship, I had been texting her a bit asking her schedule and wanting to hang out really bad, to take my mind off of work. I came off a bit creepy/desperate/came on too strong, and I could kinda tell something was going wrong. Her mood towards me that week seemed to change from interested, to putting up with our conversations. Anyway, I made plans for us to go hiking by our local lake, there I had planned to sort of clear the air and explain my recent behaviour a little, but I also felt she would flake on me. The day comes and she ends up flaking. I sent her a text just to see if she still thought we were doin something because I was on my way somewhere else at the time. [She waited 5 hours to text me this text message. ](\nSo me being tired from work and shopping/trying to disregard her flake, sort of just agreed to her texts without starting any conflicts. [I say this, and i know this is soooo beta, but I was not really thinking at the time.] There were a couple more back and fourths with her saying she was sorry/etc and I told her not to be because it was only a month long. Well its been a week and a half, and I really dont want it to be completely over. We have not contacted eacother since the breakup, and I have no plans to contact her, as that would show great weakness on my part. I was figuring though, her birthday is in 2 months, and I was thinking that might be a good way to sort of \"catch up\" with her and grab a quick lunch and relaunch things. Idk what to do, im so shit at relationships.", "summary": "Me and this girl were dating for a month, I fucked up and made myself look super desperate and scared her off. She didnt seem unpleasant in her \"break up\" text, and I think I might still have  a shot."}
{"id": "t3_115svb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "EX-FWB[27/f] Wishes to get back in contact and be  friends. I'm [25/m] not so sure....", "post": "I was seeing a girl for around 4 months, and we were essentially FWB. We had a lot of problems, we have very different personalities and we literally broke up and got back together every other week it seemed. Well last time we broke up it was a really bad argument, and she basically laid into me. \n\nEarlier today she sends me a long email message basically saying that although we had our issues we got on okay as friends, which is sort of true. She apologised for having a go at me, but still I'm not sure I've forgiven her. She is now offering the opportunity to just be friends, which is what I had suggested several times before and she shot me down. Now I could essentially get what I always wanted, but I don't want it anymore. I've moved on and I just feel like whatever situation  we are in we will just keep arguing.\n\nIs it bad to just kind of reject her offer of friendship? How do I go about doing that without her being angry or being pissed off?", "summary": "Ex-FWB Wishes to \"just be friends\" I feel as though it's a bad idea. How do I let her down easily?"}
{"id": "t3_4cjmu3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30 M] broke up with my boyfriend [25 M] of 1 year. He is getting scary and I don't know how to handle it.", "post": "Found out my boyfriend was chatting and sending nude pics with men in a hookup app. He lied about the whole thing.\n\nWe've since broken up because of this. It felt like cheating to me, even if there wasn't physical contact involved (he says). I had been rather clear about what counts as cheating in my book... just for the sake of clarity I suppose. We had agreed this was not acceptable.\n\nProblem is now he's becoming scary. He keeps telling me how guilty and miserable he feels about hurting and betraying me. He's been getting drunk and messaging me, stalking me online (after we unfriended each other). The other day he said he was considering quitting his job because of how bad he felt, and a couple of days ago he mentioned he felt he might self-harm.\n\nHow should I react to this? Should I just not engage or should I worry that this may be something serious? I don't want to be with him anymore, but I definitely don't want him to hurt himself. Part of me thinks it may be just misdirection... I obviously will focus less on what he did that made me break up with him if I am worried about him. Am I selfish for thinking this?", "summary": "Broke up with my boyfriend after he betrayed my trust and lied. He's stalking me and talking about self-harming."}
{"id": "t3_3fgr87", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 ftM] with my Boyfriend [21 M] 2 weeks, are things moving too fast?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for about two weeks. He asked if it was okay to introduce me to his friends and family as his boyfriend on day two, which I said was fine. He updated his relationship status on Facebook the morning after our first 'date.'\n\nI have never had a 'traditional' dating experience- ya know, the one you see in movies? He asked me out to coffee, and a few days later we ended up at ihop at 11pm and then spent the entire night at the beach in a Gazebo- dancing, singing, snuggling. I have been spending the night at his house 2 or 3 nights a week. It feels like we have been together much longer than we have. We have cried together, laughed, and shared our secrets. \n\nI do not think I know him all of the way, just yet, and I most certainly have not given him the whole life-story. We are already best friends, inseparable. My heart races thinking about him. We have talked about just about everything under the sun. I really do love him.\n\nI am not in love with him, just yet. I do not want to give my emotions up so easily. I do not want to end up falling for someone who I may not end up being compatible with. I felt romantically attracted to one person, before, and it took quite some time to get over that. I am cautious about this guy, and I know he feels romantically attracted to me so I feel a bit guilty that I haven't gotten there yet. He is already invested in the relationship, and I have half a mind to jump ship before it gets too serious. I take it one day at a time, though.", "summary": "Is it too soon in the relationship for my boyfriend to be in love with me? We have been dating for two weeks. Is it truly love or is it something else? I don't feel that way for him, yet."}
{"id": "t3_cryg8", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Aliens are taking over my computer!", "post": "So, one day, I was surfing the web as usual, when I noticed that my bandwidth monitor was suddenly showing a huge spike in download activity. I was perplexed. This kept going and going, reaching over 250MB.\n\nThe thing is, I didn't start any downloads before this happened. I have no idea where this huge chunk of data was downloaded to, and I didn't have any programs open that were shown to be downloading updates. \n\nI closed Firefox, and it actually stopped. I don't know if it was coincidence, but it really seemed like closing my web browser stopped the download. \n\nIs it possible for data to be made to be downloaded surreptitiously by your browser?", "summary": "mysterious chunk of data downloaded with no visible source, ending when browser is closed. Does not restart when browser is reopened."}
{"id": "t3_4r70dk", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "PSA: your passport expires before the expiration date [rant]", "post": "Just wanted to pass this info along to anyone else who, like me, wouldn't have known otherwise. \n\nI have a US passport. I planned a 3 week trip through Europe, scheduled all my flights and stays in between, researched places to see and things to eat, read blogs and watched videos, packed my bags and double checked to make sure I had everything, showed up at the airport yesterday, and was promptly denied because my return date was 2.5 months before my passport expired. \n\nTo travel to Europe, my return date has to be 3 months before expiration. My passport expired before the stated expiration date.\n\nI was disappointed and so sad. Thankfully my friends who were seeing me off came back to pick me up, I made an appointment with the passport agency (earliest one is for Thursday) and rescheduled my trip to Friday. I'm hoping and praying that passport turn around is same day as some people have told me, otherwise my entire trip is doomed. \n\nSo because I thought my passport expired on the day of expiration, my three weeks got cut to 2 weeks. I've rescheduled, dropped 2 countries from my travel list, and am sitting at home with nothing to do, a cleaned out fridge, and moping for an entire week... \n\nI wish I had checked and known about this passport thing, and I'm disappointed in myself and in the system in general for such a maddening rule. \n\nI hope you wonderful Travellers out there learn from my mistake. And if you already knew about this, are actively letting others know :( I sincerely wish that international airlines would automatically ask about passports for these kinds of things: I honestly had no idea about these rules and I'm sad my long vacation got cut by 33%.\n\nBest of luck to everyone out there", "summary": "your passport technically expires before the stated expiration date, based on when and where you are traveling to... Check to make sure if your passport expires in less than 6 months to a year!! "}
{"id": "t3_4f8iez", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Girl [F18] and I [M18] like each other but I'm not sure what to do in our situation", "post": "So this girl and I like each other. I confessed my feelings and she shared them except she said she doesn't want to date for two reasons. \n\n 1. School is almost over. After that, we have to spend the summer back in our hometowns on the opposite sides of our state which is like a 7 hour drive nonstop from each other.\n\n 2. She wants to get her stuff together before getting into a relationship. She can never say no and ends up \"carrying too much on her plate.\" She does a lot of volunteering. So I'm assuming she wants to organize herself before dating.\n\nIn the end she said, \"we'll see in August about dating.\"\n\nWe have like a month left here. What do I do now? I'm not going to push her into it or anything but I don't know if I should possibly be more flirty or touchy with her when we hang out.", "summary": "Girl and I like each other. Won't date until August because we have to go home and she wants to organize her life. Should I be more touchy or flirty with her over the next month before school ends?"}
{"id": "t3_10ic79", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is she still into me?", "post": "I started dating this girl and there were ups and downs as usual. Unfortunately, the downs outweighed the ups and I broke up with her. I told her that I really enjoy hanging out with her but I'm not interested in her romantically. She said she was fine with it. Now we hang out on a daily basis and you could consider us best friends.\n\nWe still do things that some people would consider \"dating\", like walking in the park and going for meals, sharing drinks, going shopping, hanging out at each other's place, vacationing together, etc, but I consider it platonic. This sort of behavior is normal in a guy to guy relationship, so can't read into that too much. However, she will make references to our previous sexual relationship and tell me about how she rejects people who come onto her, and she plans trips with me as we used to and offers to pay for the entire trip if I go (we used to split it 50/50). \n\nShe still buys me meals like she used to when we were dating and she flirts with me a bit. I think she is still into me. If so, am I leading her on by hanging out with her all the time as her best friend? I know that I explained to her that I am not interested in dating her, but if she really is still interested, is that leading her on? Do you think she is interested or is that normal behavior for after-relationship friendship?", "summary": "= My ex-girlfriend and current bestie is showing signs of interest even though I'm not interested. Am I leading her on by hanging out with her even if I already told her I'm not interested?"}
{"id": "t3_2w4mym", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22F] am still living with my ex [31M]. Can I bring dates to our apartment?", "post": "We have been living together for about 18 months. Our relationship started out casually and developed romantically overtime. We decided to live together with friends because rent in NYC is expensive. \n\nHe broke up with me 4 weeks ago and moved into our office. His reason for breaking up with me was that he wants to focus on his Master's degree studies and my relationship with him was too distracting. \n\nOur current living situation is a 6 bedroom duplex with a total of 6 people living here. His room is down the hall from mine. \n\nWe still have 6 months to go on our current lease. Moving is not an option for either of us. \n\nI want to move on and see other people. How do I talk to my ex about bringing dates to the apartment?", "summary": "I'm still living with my ex (separate bedrooms) and have 6 more months on the lease. How do I talk to him about me bringing my dates to our apartment?"}
{"id": "t3_2a8tc0", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "New job, no debt: buy or rent?", "post": "I just accepted my first \"big\" job offer with a solid salary ($45k), full health benefits, and all the good stuff. This job is going to take me to a new state, to a small college town. The houses are affordable (I'm looking at the $50k-120k range) and I have no debt, with about $10,000 in savings and an old but operable and paid off car. I've been pre-qualified for up to ~$150k for a home loan. It'll probably have to be an FHA loan because I don't have much for a down payment. \n\nIn my head, buying a small house seems like a great idea. I would be investing my money into property instead of \"giving it away\" to another landlord like the past 5 years. But all my family members seem to think it's a bad idea. \"It's a lot of work,\" or \"maybe you won't like the town you're moving to\" is their advice. \n\nAm I overlooking some big issues? What should I consider in making the decision to buy a home early in my life? Would it be better to invest my new income stream into something else? Other than the savings, I have about $200 worth of mediocre stocks. No other investments.", "summary": "How would you set up your ideal investment and living plan if you had to \"start over fresh\" with a good paying job in a new town with no debt?"}
{"id": "t3_n5qfw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Random eBay seller is threatening my mom with \"criminal charges\" and mail fraud for a completed transaction, and we have no idea why.  Reddit, what are our options?", "post": "I went to post this question and I saw that another eBay problem is on the front page.  So here's the story: my mom bought a roughly $300 item from a seller on eBay a few weeks ago.  Part of it was damaged, so she asked if she could send it back and get a refund.  He agreed.  She sent it back, he refunded her money, and he left her positive feedback.  End of story, right?  Well, tonight he emails her and says (wording slightly altered): \"I knew you were a scumbag, but this is worse than I knew.  Watch out for criminal charges and mail fraud.\"\n\nShe sent back everything that he sent her.  He can have no possible grievance against her; as I said, he even left her positive feedback for the transaction.  Is it even worthwhile to file a complaint with eBay, or should we just ignore him?", "summary": "eBay seller accuses my mom of mail fraud after he agreed to refund her money *and* left her positive feedback. What should we do?"}
{"id": "t3_1l3r7k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm not sure where our [F18/M25] friends with benefits situation is heading right now", "post": "We started our friends with benefits a few months back, after meeting and getting to know each other by playing baseball. We got together in secret, as he lives with his older sister who I work with and it would be a messy situation if she were to find out. \n\nI am heading off to university next week, and we've been talking about how we'll keep seeing each other (or not) since the drive is nearly 7 hours long. We've decided that we'll still continue the secret relationship and Skype and whatnot unless I find a new relationship at school.\n\nHe's completely open to me dropping this relationship while I'm at school and move on to \"bigger and better things,\" but says I cannot tell him because he'll feel upset. I feel like we've really grown attached to each other in the last while and really want the best for each other, but we both have a hard time letting go of it. I told him I'm happy with what we've got going on and I have no intentions to change it at the moment, and he's rather conflicted with it. He cannot have a real relationship with me due to the older sister and my age, and we're both stuck on what to do. He's even offered to come visit me every couple weeks, but I've told him that's way too much of a hassle for him and I can't let him go such a long way just to have a couple rounds in bed and drive back home. I'd love to hear any advice you guys might have. Thank you.", "summary": "My fwb and I really enjoy each other's company but are unsure what to do about the long distance and how we can keep our relationship going."}
{"id": "t3_2m91wh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my friend with weird background [20 F] 3 years, Stopped pursuing her after rejection, now getting signals that she's interested, but not too sure.", "post": "This girl and i go pretty far back. Back when we were in high school i always considered her a friend and liked her a lot, but strictly as a friend, she had boyfriends and stuff throughout high school so there wasn't really a chance even if i wanted to. \n\nWe end up going to the same university and had a class together. I started talking to her again. She's now single and been out of her last relationship for about 2 months. We end up hanging out every weekend for a few weeks, hiking, bowling, sitting down and watching movies, whatever, it seemed to be going well. \n\nHalloween roles around and we are going to a party together. I find a good moment where we are alone to ask her if she wanted to go steady. She told me that she wasn't really looking for a relationship at the moment, (she stressed that she had definitely thought about a relationship with mw and that i wasn't in her friend zone). Im obviously upset and decide to sleep it off in my car that night. She texts me in the middle of that night saying she was really sorry and stuff like that. i ignore it and hit the hay.\n\nI stop actively pursuing her. I text less often. and started hanging with other people for a couple of weeks. All of a sudden she starts all out texting me, in the mornings to when we go to bed. It is like never before. \n\nAnd now she's giving me what i consider 'signals', by asking me how she looks, fishing for compliments, saying i look nice, complimenting my hair style and stuff like, she even described to me what kind of panties she wears, and offering me rides. She brushes my shoulder a lot and has gotten a lot more touchy feely. \n\nSo i think she trying to say something but I'm not really sure. I wanted to do a reddit post to see what anyone else's take on it was. Does anyone have any ideas about this? or maybe any some suggestions about my actions in the future?", "summary": "Girl rejects me, stop talking to her as much, she starts giving signals again like crazy, anyone have suggestions on my future actions?"}
{"id": "t3_3lo2kn", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By being a good host", "post": "So earlier this weekend i reunited with my best friend who I hadn't seen for three years. He is staying over at my place and we decide to go out to the bars and in the process I invite a bunch of people including the girl I am interested in. At the first two bars my friends keep telling me about how they were going to wing man for me and it all worked out great up until the third bar. We are touching and dancing and things are going great till I feel the need to step outside for some air. By the time I come back the two friends who were wing manning for me, were wing manning each other. A few friends and the girl i like decide to come back home to my place and have some drinks and chill. As a gesture I lay out a bed roll for my friends to lean on and this is where it all goes down hill. Keep in mind that i sleep on a Japanese style floor mattress. A mix of tired and drunk kicks in to where I am just drained from the amount of social interaction to the point where I'm barely in the conversations at all. I can't say anything without being completely shut down by everyone in the room. Including jokes about my virginity and about any rebuttal I make to dispute the fact. I remain quiet for the rest of the night leading to right now. The girl I like and my friend are spooning on the bedroll I laid out for them while I am stuck in a 50 degree room with no pillow, mattress, or blanket.", "summary": "Tried to be a nice guy and get with a girl I'm interested in. Instead ended up bedless with my friend spooning with said girl on what I sleep on every night."}
{"id": "t3_3gyypb", "subreddit": "Cooking", "title": "My Grandmother and I were discussing salmon. . .", "post": "The story goes that back in the early 1990s she decided to cook a whole salmon for a dinner party. She went and got the wild beast, already cleaned, from an excellent fish mongress near her house in NE Ohio. The fish mongress asked if my grandmother was going to prepare it in the DISHWASHER.\nMy Grandmother, looking very confused said \"I've never heard of that!\" The woman went on to describe the process:\n\n-Season the fish with a little salt and pepper inside and out.\n-Wrap it tightly in two layers of heavy duty foil.\n-Place the fish in the top rack of your dishwasher and run it with no other dishes or soap present.\n-Serve immediately.\n\nNeedless to say, it was the best salmon she and her guests ever had, and I wanted to share it with all of you.", "summary": "My grandma cooked salmon in the dishwasher like the fish mongress said, and it was perfectly done. The recipe is written above."}
{"id": "t3_2guw21", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by speeding up to see a bunny", "post": "When my alarm went off this morning at 6:20am for my morning jog, I considered going back to sleep. We had an impromptu hangout session with our neighborhood friends the night before and I had one two many beers.  However, I really needed to jog off the Hooters I had for lunch the day before, so I begrudgingly slapped on my running shoes and left.\n\nAs I'm rounding the half way point of my run, I am dripping with sweat and the beer demons are exiting my body.  In my hangover haze I look a ways up the path and see a bunny crossing.  I speed up a little to see the cute creature, and realize it's tail is straight up in the air and his ass is aimed for me.  This is no bunny, it is a skunk.\n\nI freak the fuck out and start sprinting at a pace that my heart is about to explode.  I don't smell the skunk, but I've never been sprayed by a skunk, so I'm not sure how fast the stink permeates. I can only imagine at this point I smell like the backstage area back in the day at a Cypress Hill concert.  As I make it back to my home I run into my teenage son's room and yell out \"WAKE UP, DO I SMELL LIKE SKUNK?\"  He half sits up and replies \"No Mom\" lays down and mutters \"you're so weird.\"", "summary": "Sped up on my jog to see a bunny, sprayed by skunk (at least thought I had), found out what my son truly thinks of me."}
{"id": "t3_3id913", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (22F) feel like I'll never meet someone because I dont post racy selfies", "post": "This is a very embarassing problem which I never admitted to anyone. But here goes..\n\nI live through social media, I can't feel good about myself unless I post selfies, I can't feel pretty in my new clothes unless I post selfies, I feel like shit about my body, until I post selfies and someone tells me I look great.\n\nI hate it. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in my life. i've quit cold turkey 25 days ago (no facebook/insta) I feel happy and relieved without them to be honest, I feel better about myself in general too.. and I haven't even had the impulse to use facbook or post photos.. but  now I just feel left out of everything..\n\nI feel that if I don't constantly post selfies and photos of myself, I'll never find a boyfriend, I see tons of girls like jen selter for example, who post photos of their bodies and oviously guys go crazy for that, but I just feel if I don't post photos showing off my body, guys will never know what I look like and will just go for the girls who show it off..\n\nI tried to convince myself that this is not the case and if someone really wants to be with me, they will.. but I feel like nobody will want to get to know me cause I dont show off my boobs/ass in pictures and they will just go for the girls who do and I'll always be alone..\n\nDo you have any tips on how I can stop this? I feel like I can't get over it no matter what I tell myself..", "summary": "I feel like Im never going to meet a guy who likes me cause I rarley post racy selfies and guys will only go for the girls who do."}
{"id": "t3_30eg6v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Hey r/relationships, my girlfriend [19F] has been ignoring me for no apparent reason. I would really like your advice on this.", "post": "First of all, excuse my English, because I'm pretty drunk right now and English is not my native language. \n\nOkay, so, I'm originally not from England, but I've lived there for a couple of months and I met a girl there, who is not from my home country, and I totally fell in love with her. I'm now living in Spain and I really thought we could make it work, but for no reason at all she just started ignoring me. She went from all happy, glee and lovely to ignoring me all of a sudden. She didn't give me a response for two days now, which sounds like  a short time, but it's killing me on the inside. I like to think that a healthy relationship is about mutual respect and trust and to be honest, I don't really trust her and she doesn't show me any respect as of late. I really liked it with her in England, but now I'm just making myself crazy. \nShould I break-up with or, or should I wait till she responds? Thank you in advance for the advice.", "summary": "Girl I met abroad is my gf now, but she is making it really difficult to maintain the relationship. Advice please."}
{"id": "t3_v3j77", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redditers in a relationship. What arguments have you gotten into over something that didn't warrant an argument to begin with?", "post": "After having a pile of dry clean only clothes build up, I decided that I'd finally take it to the dry cleaners. Most of it is my wife's clothes but I did have some work shirts in there as well (total of about 19 pieces combined). So after the attendant separates the piles of clothes, counts them, enters them into the system and after I respond to his question of when do I want to pick them up, the total bill came out to $102.50. \n\nNow, I'll admit, I cringed hard but paid up and moved on so that these things wouldn't be sitting around any longer. When I tell the wife how much it cost, she immediately says that it was too much money and she doesn't wear half of that stuff anyway. Well excuse me! How the hell was I supposed to know you didn't want those clothes anymore? Anyway, we had it back and forth for a minute until she said she had to go back to work, said bye and hung up.", "summary": "I thought I did the husbandly thing by taking her things to get dry cleaned but I get put out to dry instead."}
{"id": "t3_3y8dk2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So two days ago Me (24M) hooked up with my straight-ish roommate (21M) of 5 months. Things are crazy awkward ever since, is there any way I can help this blow over?", "post": "I really do think he's straight, but was just trying it out.  We were drinking.  We have kind of a flirty friendship, but I think he just likes the attention.  I've told him before that I thought he was hot and he plays up to it a lot.\n\nWe were drinking and watching Game of Thrones and it was after a Dany sex scene and we started talking about who we like on the show and he grabbed my hand and put it on his crotch to show me how hard he was.  I went with it and started stuff.  \n\nI don't really remember the actual sex part, I blacked out, but I know we had it.  I remember some things.  I woke up the next day in my bed with him, we were both naked.  I got in the shower and when I got out he was gone.\n\nHe's been really weird with me ever since.  I'm not surprised, it was a mistake, but I hate that he doesn't even talk to or look at me.  I'm willing to pretend it never happened if that'd make it easier for him, but he seriously is just giving me one word answers and not even looking at me.", "summary": "fooled around with my straight roommate and now he's being weird around me.  Any way we can move past this?"}
{"id": "t3_d1bn1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, please help me help others.", "post": "Hey reddit, I'm having a bit of a quarter-life crisis, and I figure some people could probably give some advice that would be helpful.\n\nHere's the situation for me: I'm 22, living in WA, one quarter away from finishing my AA, and wanting to transfer to the local university here so I can be a teacher. Problem is, my grades are very terrible. \n\nI did poorly in high school and just barely graduated (by failing a class, no less), and while my grades at the community college have improved, they're by no means good (around ~2.6). I've been rejected from the university about three times now, and I've lost faith in myself to keep going. I've done my practicum at a high school and had my talent/eagerness complimented on, but I'm worried that I'll never get to be a teacher, and I honestly don't know what to do now. I want to work with high schoolers and I love doing it, but I'm not sure if that'll happen if I don't get my act together.\n\nThat aside, I'm also a fucking mess myself. I'm not going to measure my amount of self-worth by whether or not I have a girlfriend, or if I've got a car, but I'm a person that lacks motivation in life (although my interests make me motivated). I'm not a total slob, but I could definitely improve myself by working out and other healthy things too.\n\nSo reddit, what the fuck do I do?", "summary": "want to be teacher but shitty grades and low confidence stop me from trying to apply for the fourth time to local U. also a bit of a slob and mess in life."}
{"id": "t3_332qp4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my LDR GF[19 F] - Jealous Feelings Are Stirrin'", "post": "I am currently in a Long Distance Relationship with my girlfriend. We're both in the US going to college on opposite sides of the country. We were high school sweethearts and have made it through almost 2 full years of college. We have a very loving relationship and I'm very happy to be in a relationship with her. \n\nMy girlfriend (let's call her Sue) is in a sorority and is very active in it. She recently went to a dance they call Formal, and had a blast. It's custom to take a date to these things, and since I wasn't there she took someone whose friends were going but otherwise wasn't technically allowed into the dance. I didn't have a problem with it because I figured they would just hang out with their separate friend groups once in the dance. \n\nSue told me that's exactly what happened and how she even got stood up by the guy - he kind of just showed up with his friends at the dance instead of meeting up beforehand. I was glad she had a good time despite that.\n\nI just checked Facebook and Sue has a new profile picture. It's her and the guy from last night. She is laughing and having a good time, with her hands on his back, and he's doing a somewhat funny face. It's a cute picture, but for some reason her having another guy in her Facebook profile picture makes me uncomfortable. \n\nI scrolled through some of her other pictures and this guy turns up on more than one occasion, even before the dance. I want to ask her if it's the same guy, but she is currently in a dance *performance* (not the same as the Formal she went to last night) so she is unreachable. \n\nNormally I'm not very jealous at all, but seeing that picture just made me sad and feel like I was being replaced for some reason. \n\nMy question is, is there any reason for me to be jealous? If not, please talk some sense into me! We've also been getting in a bunch of small arguments lately so I'd rather handle this in the easiest, most un-confrontational manner. I don't want to fight over this if it's nothing.", "summary": "My LDR GF set her profile picture as her with another guy. I'm getting jealous feelings, how should I handle it?"}
{"id": "t3_1kgw3q", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Went to Marshall's, fit into size 6 Michael Kors skinny jeans ... Promptly did a happy dance. (progress pics)", "post": "F/23/5'2\" SW: 190lbs GW: 135lbs CW: 140lbs -- -50lbs since January\n\nI've been lurking on here and commenting on other peoples' amazing success stories since January, and after today's little NSV, I decided it might be time to share some pictures. \n\nIn January, after seeing a picture of myself from Christmas (in album), I decided it was time for a change. For as long as I can remember, I had been overweight (obese, to be honest). I was unhappy and hopeless and pretty much had resigned myself to being that way forever. Fat and alone forever, if you will. Then, as I said, I saw that picture and I decided enough was enough. Something inside me just clicked and I got up off my ass, called the gym and bought a membership. It still took me a week after buying said membership to actually step foot in the gym, but I did it. I downloaded a C25K app, started logging EVERYTHING I consumed into MyFitnessPal, and bought a Fitbit. Those three things together had the pounds just falling off of me. \n\nIt's now 8 months later and I am 50 lbs lighter. I can run 4 miles without stopping, and I consistently eat between 1200-1400 calories a day. I'm still 5lbs from my original goal, and those last 5lbs aren't coming off easily -- but I'm happy with myself. Not just happy, I friggin love myself, you guys. I think I look damn good and I finally have the confidence to just be myself. \n\nAnyway, thanks for reading this far. And thanks to all of you inspiring people out there. You all are THE BEST motivation a girl could ask for. Keep on keeping on, friends.", "summary": "Girl sees photo of herself, snaps, starts running and counting calories, loses 50 lbs and is ecstatic with herself. Yippee!"}
{"id": "t3_20be9f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] think my 2 month relationship with my girlfriend [18 F] is not going to work. What do I do.", "post": "I like my girlfriend, as in have feelings for her, but I know for sure she definitely feels stronger towards me than I do to her [texts me constantly, told me she loved me etc.].   \nShe's a great girl, , it's just that we're too different. Way too different for a decent relationship to work. It feels like we've been going out for ages in that the initial spark is gone (we were seeing each other for about 2 months before I asked her out).   \nThe only thing that is holding me back from breaking up with her is that her best friend is one of my good friends (how we met) and I sense more than one relationship is going to end if I call it quits.", "summary": "The spark (for me) is gone in our relationship very early on. Should I stick it out to see how it goes or end it."}
{"id": "t3_36f9eu", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Be rude to your teen, see how much you really rely on him", "post": "My mother has a really bad habit for forming circle arguments where she restarts the conversation after its long dead and I don't care anymore.\n\nLast week: \n\nI come home from work after school, it is 10:30 on a Tuesday night, I am beat I put my half eaten pizza in the fridge and head for bed. Not before she catches me in the doorway of my room and yells about how I haven't fed my dog or vacuumed in a week.\n\nMe: I have been leaving at 6:00 am and only come home for 30 minutes after school to shower. I don't have time during the week but do everything I am asked on weekends. \n\nHer: well maybe you should quit your job so you can help out with the horses, goats, chickens, and your brothers.\n\nNote: none of those are mine, I pay for my phone, gas, insurance, clothes and food. Gas is very expensive as I have a diesel car and drive 70 miles a day. \n\nI decided to show her just how expensive it is. She has had to pay for everything this month via my stepdad who is tried of her nagging me for the 1-2 hrs I am awake at home. The total thus far \n$234 a week\n\n$65 in fuel\n$84 in insurance\n$25 in food\n$60 for a pair of pants her goat ripped \n\nAnd this is a cheap week. Next week my car needs glow plugs and a coolant flush before summer....", "summary": "if your teenage son costs you less than $10 a month, hasn't gotten in trouble, and has a job. Don't nag him or tell him to quit his job."}
{"id": "t3_4s58no", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Mine(M17) sociophobic girlfriend (f16) willingly goes to party while she always refuses to go to my house", "post": "Well,my girlfriend(f16) have sociophobia,everytime when we are not outside,we MUST be at her home,she never come to my home,\nshe tell me that she is afraid of that something will happen (stomach ache,fear,etc. - her symptoms),so i am okay with\nthat we go to her home.\n\nUntil yesterday,at morning she texted me that we wont be together that day because she going to sleep to her friend (f23) and she come today,it first,i was like \"Okay honey,take care of yourself),but inside of me,i am \"mad\" and feel decieved.\n\nWhy decieved? Because at my home,when i want to ho to my home with her,we are everytime alone which shoud help her about \nthat symptoms,but she always refuses,thanks to that she doesnt even know my parents (i know almost all her family because we are always at her home..) after 8 months of being tohether in relationship.\nAnd also, when she went sleep to that friend,there was also a party,maybe 10 people (5f/5m) and one of guys that were there was..well...her earlyer crush (?)..she said that if she was older she would already be with him...and it look like she didnt had any symptoms at that party at all,she even told me how they both had a little perverted talk(if i would do that,a wrangle would be already here...)\n\nP.S.: non-native english here,please dont blame me :)", "summary": "My sociophobic GF who always refuses to go to my home willingly goes to party and sleep here at night,how should i feel about it or what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_3796ao", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my Girlfriend [25 F] 1.5years, Tells me I am not romantic but makes me feel like she does not care about my needs.", "post": "My pregnant girlfriend says I do not care about her and all this other stuff. Yet I do everything possible that I can. Right now I am inbetween jobs, So I am putting in effort into learning things for my career because I have enough money saved up until I go back to college and work.\n\nEverything I do does not seem to be good enough. I do not want to have sex with her because she refuses to talk to me about things that matter to me. Will not and I mean absolutely will not talk to me about things that bother me. Yet she wants me to listen to her gossip about co workers and things of that nature. I absolutely do not care about gossip.\n\nI told her she does not make me feel romantic and she says fine then. I told her what she has to do to make me want to have sex more and does not want to put forth the effort into making me feel sexual. I can't have sex unless I feel appreciated. (not common for a guy) She just expects me to be sexual 100% of the time and I am not.\n\nShe yells at me for not doing things with her kids, Yet She has not once taken them out by herself since we have been together. I have around 1-3 times a week taken them to do something. The kids are her sisters and not biologically hers. Their mother is a junkie.\n\nI am about to have a child with this women. Should I back out and just try to do my part as much as I can from the sidelines, Try to get custody and raise the kid. Help please.", "summary": "Pregnant girlfriend wont listen to me when I tell her what I need in a relationship, Expects me to change my actions without her putting in her half. What do I do."}
{"id": "t3_4nnu34", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21 M] This girl I am interested in smokes and I'm worried about my health, also she is vegan", "post": "I don't know anything about second hand smoke. I never did drugs in my life. This girl I'm talking to smokes ALL the time. When we are walking together, she smokes. I told her I didn't mind. And I really don't care.\n\nHOWEVER, I'm starting to wonder how bad this secondhand smoke is. Is it OKAY to just be beside it a little bit? Is this going to shorten my life in any way?\n\nCan a relationship still work if she smokes and I don't? Or am I going to have to walk away from her when she smokes from now on?\n\nThere is one more thing that is bothering me that I feel I should mention. She is Vegan. I am not. She told me directly that it would BOTHER her if I ate meat in front of her! Like, I can't get a burger or anything because of this! I'm wondering if this is a deal breaker. \n\nIts not fair! I don't complain about her smoking, yet here she is saying that it would bother her if I ate meat saying its rude knowing she is vegan. I feel like she is asking too much. I mean, if we go out to dinner sometime, I'm wondering if she will force me to eat vegan. Heck, I wonder if I even have to become a vegan just to be with her..", "summary": "Girl I like smokes and I'm worried about the second hand smoke, also the fact that she doesn't approve of me eating meat because she is vegan, wondering what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2c70nv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I go about fixing my (20f) relationship with my boyfriend (20m)?", "post": "I've been with him for a year and a half and we live with his mother in his family home. \n\nLately he hasn't been putting much effort into us. I'm always the one making plans, only little things, like dinner or a picnic, ect. We don't have sex regularly and that's a common argument starter and that's been going on since last July. I've talked to him about it a few times, just to let him know how it makes me feel. He tries to assure me that it has nothing to do with me, and that he finds me attractive (which I think he does, I get a quick frisking now and again :P)\n\n It was my birthday a few days ago and we started making out and he just turned away. He said he didn't want it to 'lead anywhere'. I almost left him that day because that rejected feeling is just unbearable. I don't want to pressure the guy because it would just scare me the other way round, but on the other hand it's just been pecks and cuddles for a year.  \n\nHe mentioned that if I dumped him I'd lose my job, which I would, I work for his father. For him to bring that up when I was upset scared me a little. \n\nI just feel lonely. I don't know what I'm doing wrong and I've asked, he says he's just being 'spacey' or he's in a bad mood.  Obviously I love him, I've never loved anyone like I do him. He's a kind guy, and he's very protective of me. What do you suggest I do to try and help this relationship out?", "summary": "Relationship is lacking any form of romance, I'm constantly making the plans and trying to do things, we don't have sex and I'm just feeling lonely. I love him and I want him to want me more."}
{"id": "t3_41lu4l", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going to a party that my crush was going to be at", "post": "So this happened a while back and I didn't know what to do about it.\n\nThis girl that I have a crush on (we'll call her Z) is roommates with a friend of mine. My friend told me about a party that she was going to throw with her whole house and she invited me. I was going to go the party with another one of my friends. I was really excited to see Z because I had been crushing on her really hard for a while (maybe 3 months). The thing is, we never really talked because I was too shy and because I couldn't bring myself to say something to her. \n\nHowever, a couple days before the party I finally had mustered up enough courage to talk to her. I was chatting her up, telling her things like 'How I was excited to see her and how I was looking forward to partying with her' and she told me that she was excited to see me there too. \n\nMy buddy and I went to the party and in the beginning of the night, Z wasn't at the party so I was chilling by myself because my buddy met up with Z's roommate and they hung out, drank and smoked weed with the other people at the party (I didn't drink that night and I don't smoke weed). I was by myself for a couple of hours while everyone partied but I didn't leave because I was still excited to finally meet and hang out with Z for the first time.\n\nA couple hours after we got to the party, Z finally showed up. She apparently went to some show and got drunk there and came home\u2026with another guy. She didn't even acknowledge me as she walked past me. She was all over him and all I could do was watch as he took her into her bedroom. I finally decided to leave when I heard her moaning from outside.", "summary": "Went to a party to hang out with my crush, she wasn't there but she showed up hours later with some random and banged him"}
{"id": "t3_qcwfk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "An ex-coworker is suing the company I work for and wants me as a witness. What should I do?", "post": "Background: This guy was fired a couple months ago. The company told him it was because of his attitude and because he had been \"threatening\" toward his coworkers, particularly his female coworkers, of which I am one. He wasn't everyone's favorite coworker - he was very quiet and kind of awkward - but I think it was because we as a team are a bit cliquey and he was a latecomer. He never quite fit into the big weird family we all made up.\n\nHe and the company have been fighting over the unemployment compensation he feels he is entitled to and the company feels he is not. Several of his former coworkers, including me, wrote character statements for him asserting that we never felt threatened by him and that, essentially, the company had lost a valuable employee in him. Now the company is fighting him again, demanding that he pay back the unemployment benefits he has received, and he is taking it to court. \n\nThe company listed two specific incidents in which this guy was supposedly threatening, and I happen to have been present for both of them. I never felt threatened in the least, and so he wants to call me as a witness when he sues the company. He has already submitted many, many documents as evidence in his case and says he would like me and one other person as witnesses.\n\nThe thing is, I'm scared. I don't exactly love my job, but I don't exactly want to lose it either. I have gotten conflicting answers as to what the company can do to me if I serve as a witness; the most likely answer seems to be that they can't technically fire me, but as employers often do, they can probably find other reasons to fire me even though this might be the real reason, so that they look good on paper. In a way I would be honored to get fired for this, because I believe it is right, and the truth, but I also can't really afford it. Can you help me figure out what to do?", "summary": "Coworker got fired, is suing the company I still work for, wants me as a witness, I'm having a moral dilemma over it and would appreciate any advice."}
{"id": "t3_1s32oy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "We stopped seeing each other, now she [F22] is messaging me [M23] that she misses me. Don't know how to reply.", "post": "A few weeks ago I started seeing this girl. We had a great time. Some things were strange, because she would text me 24/7 and get mad if I didn't respond within 1 min. She was also very indecisive with everything. Overall things were going well. I work 50+ hours a week as process engineer and she is still in undergrad for business. She constantly demanded things from me like hanging out all the time, lots of texting. When I asked for it to be toned down a bit, since I only have so much time in a day she would get mad.  \n\n  Things moved fast, she said I was pushy about sex and maybe I was, but I was confused because we were both naked in her bed, she undressed first,  after 3 weeks of seeing each other and I thought that was coming that night. So she kind of got mad after I asked her if we were doing it that night. Anyways we made up the next day and things went the same. Another night we are in the same situation. We had just talked about waiting then all of the sudden she gets on me and we are do it. I was confused. We do it again the next day and then she says she feels bad about it and I have had enough confusion at this point so I get mad because she is making a big deal about it. So I try to patch things up but she isn't saying anything so I leave and a week later I get these messages about how she found a better guy and that I hurt her feelings.\n       Now she is sending me messages that she misses me and she keeps thinking about us. Her last messages were \"I really miss you\" and \"Idk why I've been thinking about this so much\". I did like her and I still kind of do but I don't want to deal with the same thing all over again. What should I say? I want to say that I do miss the good times we had, but I don't want to a repeat of last time.", "summary": "We ended a short relationship now she is texting me that she misses me. I do not want things to go back the way they were and I do not know how to respond the right way."}
{"id": "t3_4gw231", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] with my boyfriend [18 M] 1 year, would it be awful of me to suggest I'd find him more attractive if he gained weight?", "post": "I know this is kind of a shallow question but here goes, my boyfriend and I have been dating for around a year now and I love him a lot - we're young, I have no misconceptions that we'll be \"together forever\" because shit happens but as it stands I'm very happy with him. My only problem, really, is that he is very, very skinny.\n\nI know he struggles with his weight, he doesn't have an eating disorder but just struggles to eat enough to put on weight. He's nearing severely underweight for his height and age, and honestly I'm worried about him. His face is always really gaunt and angular, he has constant dark circles under his eyes (which are always red anyway, idk what that's about) and honestly, I think his waist thickness is around the same size as my leg, which can't be all that good. So part of this does come from a health standpoint.\n\nHowever some of it is also, admittedly, my own preferences. I like thicker guys over thinner ones - I'm not expecting him to get ripped or anything, hell I'd prefer a little chub on him over that. I'm kinda fat myself, not grossly overweight but still pretty tubby, and when I want to do anything intimate - like sitting on his lap or something - I feel like I'm going to break him, or that I'm crushing him - which I get is my own insecurity, but I don't think its helped by his weight. He's really bony too - sometimes it genuinely hurts to hug him properly or have sex because his hipbones jut out a lot and hit my thighs.\n\nI just don't know how to approach this topic without coming off like an ass, because I know how shitty it is when people comment on your weight. And especially because its fifty percent me being worried about his health and fifty percent about my actual attraction towards him. So I'm just looking for suggestions on how to bring this up and discuss it in a more \"I'm worried about your health and improving your health/weight would also increase my attraction towards you\" sort of way", "summary": "Boyfriend is skinny, I'm fat, I'm both concerned about him being underweight and about how much more attracted to him I would be if he was a more normal weight. How to talk to him about it?"}
{"id": "t3_fzl89", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Mainly looking for some tips to get through the first couple dates until we're completely comfortable together. I REALLY like this girl.", "post": "Hey guys, thanks for even just reading this. First let me say i'm not the best writer, so some of this may seem jumbled together. Here I go:\nI'm 17, 18 in 3 months, senior (male) in high school. Not being arrogant, but I'm a decent looking guy. I've hooked up with a fair ammount of girls, but haven't even bothered having any type of relationship with them, was just in it for pleasure.\nBut i'm changing...chilling out more if yuo will. I'm the pickiest guy I know when it comes to girls, it takes alot to impress me. But oh my god, i've met this girl, and she's amazing. She's beautiful, and I NEVER say that about girls. We have so much in common, it's crazy. I can definately see myself being with her. Don't get me wrong, i'm not getting my hopes up or anything, but we may be perfect for each other.\nBut the problem is, we haven't been close for LONG, and we are not even talking about dating, just hanging out for now. But the only thing I have to get past for now is the first couple times we hangout, or \"date\". I know it will get more comfortable after time, but what can I do now to help? What are some special/memorable things I could do or say during a first date? On the first date am I supposed to go in for a kiss, maybe on a cheek? All i'm asking for is some advice, please. Thanks so much in advanced...I really like this girl.", "summary": "i really like this girl, she also likes me. what are some things i can do to keep her around. I need advice in every field."}
{"id": "t3_3cd5qo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help! I (21F) just found out my boyfriend (27M) of a year got his last gf pregnant and then left her", "post": "So my bf and I have been together for about a year, I met his ex briefly when they were dating (bf and I were sort-of friends before dating) and she was really nice. Anyway I just found out that she got pregnant while they were dating, he wanted her to have an abortion but she chose to keep the baby. So he left her and hasn't had any contact with her or the child. \n\n2 questions:\n1)\tShould he have told me that he got her pregnant and what does it say that he didn't tell me himself (instead I had to find out through gossip)\n2)\tShould I try and get him to meet his child? He doesn't want to discuss it whenever I try and bring it up, he just gets annoyed and says I'm not supporting him.\n3)\tShould I reach out to the mother and see what she wants (i.e. if she wants me to try and get him to see his child or whether she's happy alone). We're not friends but I've stalked her FB page and could message her there??", "summary": "I really really love my boyfriend but I'm scared of what this whole thing says about his judgement and morals. Thoughts please!"}
{"id": "t3_103hsy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Should I (19/f) talk to my boyfriend (20/m) about my crush?", "post": "I've been dating this guy since the beginning of June (about 3 months now) and things have been going great. Two weeks ago though I learned my mother is moving to another town (we'll call it Town X) about 1.5hours away and has said I can come live with her. Now, I'm absolutely going because I've wanted to live in Town X for a long time and I'm not going to give up this opportunity. I talked with my boyfriend and he said he understands and still wants to try making the relationship work and so do I. However in Town X I have a friend (let's call him John) who I have a slight crush on. I met John while he was visiting in my town shortly after becoming official with my bf. Physically  John is exactly my type, and he's very intelligent with a great sense of humor (we bonded over Reddit funny enough). Because I'm attracted to John I made sure the few times we've hung out it's been in a group and I haven't put myself in any situations that could lead to something (like drinking with him). My attitude about it up until now has been \"Oh well. Crushes happen, but I have a boyfriend.\" Since I told John I'll be moving up to Town X, we've been talking a lot more though. I also learned where I'm moving to will be 10-15minutes away from where he lives. He's also the only person I know up in Town X, and we'll probably be going to the same school in the Spring, so I feel like we're going to spend a lot of time together. A mutual friend told me John has a crush on me as well and would honestly prefer us to be a couple instead of the guy I'm with now. I like my boyfriend very much and I think he's the nicest guy I've ever been with, but I feel like the world's building up circumstances to push me and John into something in a weird sort of way. I'm going to try my best to keep things going with my bf, and I believe communication is key, so should I try to talk to my bf about John? If so, what should I say?", "summary": "Have a BF but am moving to a city where a guy I like who I'm pretty sure likes me too lives. Should I talk to my BF about this? What should I say? How?"}
{"id": "t3_10rz2c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Animation major isn't working for me, what should I do?", "post": "I'm currently in a 4 year program in digital animation, when I was younger I wanted to work with 3D modeling and hopefully work with video games as a career choice. However, I'm starting to realize this might not be something I want to do, it's not the workload that's making me question it but I'm not really too skilled with using the programs the school gave us and I have what my professors said \"average\" drawing talent and I went though heavy depression during the first year of college. I had a backup plan to major into History (a subject I've very good at) and become a teacher if this didn't work out but I'm afraid of talking to my parents and uncle (who are helping me pay for college) about making such a drastic change two years into college. Is there anyone in the same boat as me or anyone who could help me out?", "summary": "Animation school isn't for me, should I switch schools and become a history major and how do I talk to my family about this."}
{"id": "t3_2qcg55", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by accidentally telling some children that Santa wasn't real.", "post": "This tifu happened earlier this evening, so I'm still feeling terrible about the whole thing.\n\nSo earlier today, my family met up with some of their friends went to a local restaurant after a Christmas Eve ceremony at Church. The group happened to include several young children that were ever so excited for Christmas day to come. In the restaurant some small talk and simple conversation was going on while my brother and I started to joke about the little ones. Due to my joking mindset at the time, I wasn't thinking about who I was really talking to, and when one of the kids started to say,\"I want santa to get me a new Xbox One\", I spurted out the first thing on my mind and loudly commented, \"**Well its a damn shame that Santa Claus is just mommy and daddy!**\". Instantly after that, the table was filled with silence and loud tears as the faces with ajar mouths stared at me in disgust. When i tried to divert my attention to the daggers being shot at me from around the table, I looked around the restaurant to find that many of the other patrons where giving me rude looks as well as the family and friends. Instantly my father grabbed me by the shirt and dragged me to the parking lot and talked to me about the how the three little lives that i had just ruined had been so distraught the friends of ours had to leave the restaurant. Later when we went home, we received a call saying that the kids were still crying, and that one started to destroy all of the boxes under the Christmas tree because of his loss of faith. After that I realized that all of the apologizing in the world would not fix the three little, wonderful broken hearts that i had done. So now, the rest of my Christmas break contains hard, long hours of labor at my family's friends house, and now my dad is making me find a Santa look-alike on craigslist to help stoke their belief again. Hopefully I can replenish their belief in good ol' Saint Nick before any further damage can be done", "summary": "I accidentally told some kids that santa was their parents, and now I'm slaved away at their house working like one of santa's little elves."}
{"id": "t3_41vbnq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [26 M] been dating a girl [26 F] for a couple months, and last night I failed to get an erection and she took it personal..", "post": "I feel like it's pretty normal for someone to take that personal but I I had a long day and was falling asleep when she decided to get frisky and I had a feeling my body wouldn't want to cooperate but instead of declining I tried to force myself into it and and then I got into my own head of why I couldn't get my body and body to fall in line...the results are obvious.. \n\nShe took it pretty personal and I couldn't convince her it wasn't HER who couldn't get me up.. It was just a weird occurrence. I said it twice and at this point I think trying to convince her otherwise is stereotypical and kind of sounds pathetic. What should I say to or do to clear the slate or should I just move on and pretend like it never happened?", "summary": "didn't get a hard with a girl I'm dating because I was exhausted and she doesn't believe it wasn't her who didn't \"get me up\" "}
{"id": "t3_1byn47", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23f) am in a serious relationship w/ a 23m, and a 25m at work keeps calling me beautiful.", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend for six years. I love him, but that doesn't mean we have a fair share of issues. I recently gained some weight and was diagnosed with hypothyroidism and its the cause of my weight gain. My boyfriend told me recently it's affecting our relationship and sex life. At the same time, I just started a new job and a guy I work with recently came out and told me he finds me beautiful and reminds me every day how pretty he thinks I am. My current boyfriend gives me enough emotional support but does not appreciate me physically. This new guy gives no emotional support but is desperate to have me. I don't know how to approach either one of them at this point. I have no plans on ever breaking up with my guy but I am desperate for some loving. What should I do?", "summary": "My boyfriend of six years loves me. The guy at work appreciates me. Don't know how to approach it. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_29t897", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She [20 F] said to me [24 M] \"(...) if there's going to be another time\" How should I respond to that?", "post": "I met this one girl and asked her out. We didn't know each other, only had like 5min. conversation before.\nNow, yesterday was our 3rd date. She initiated it, but at the scene suddenly seemed distant. She even said a few things that baffled me:\n\n1) She mentioned going abroad in two years to finish her degree.\n(it's like she wanted me to lose interest in her)\n\n2) She told me that her mother tried to match her with some of her colleagues over the last few years, but she found them boring or selfish. It's like she wanted to show me that she was not in a commited relationship for a long time.\n\n3) Later we got some ice cream and she offered to pay for everything. I said OK, because I would have to change my money first. So she paid, and I told her I'll change it on the way back.\nBut there was no such possibility so I said (while getting out of a tram): \"I'll return it another time\" and she responded:\n\"If there is going to be another time\". I was so baffled by this that I didn't respond. I just kissed her and had to leave.\n\nNow, as you can see, she's less interested in me than I am in her. I suppose I have three options now:\n\na) try to schedule a next date and make it really special\n\nb) give her some space and time to rethink (?)\n\nc) she's not undecided - I already lost her and should let her go and move on already\n\nWhat would you do and how would you respond in that situation?", "summary": "At 3rd date girl seems undecided. What are my options and how would you respond to \"(...) if there's going to be another time\" ?"}
{"id": "t3_44hxgq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21f] don't like to take my sister [14f] to the dog park with me. How can I explain this to my parents [45f, 47m]?", "post": "I [21f] don't like to take my sister [14f] to the dog park with me. How can I explain this to my parents [45f, 47m]? \n\nI do not live with my parents, but I see them on the regular. They live near my apartment and there is a dog park near them. It is one of the few good ones and I have been going there for a few years. \n\nI have a special needs sister who loves dogs. They are her favorite thing in the world. Dogs hate my sister and want nothing to do with her. She is loud, makes sudden movements, and throws herself at any strange dog she sees. \n\nI don't want to bring her anymore. I have friends I meet there, she is bad with dogs, and it is not fun when she is around. I don't want to be a caregiver and it turns time spent with my sister into a super unpleasant experience. \n\nI am not sure how to explain this to my parents. I have stopped bringing my dogs by because my sister is unable to handle pets. They had to rehome a cat she accidentally hurt. \n\nThere are some other issues, but this is the main one. How can I explain to them that I am no longer taking my sister to the dog park? And how can I put up boundaries that are healthy?", "summary": "I [21f] don't like to take my sister [14f] to the dog park with me. How can I explain this to my parents [45f, 47m]?"}
{"id": "t3_238a3l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Has anyone ever been in a trial relationship? LDR [22F] and [22M]", "post": "I'm the 22F and we've been 'together' for 5 months now. \n\nWe're in an LDR and we're around 3k miles apart. We've never met, but we will in one month and will be spending a month together for the first time. \n\nWe're in a trial phase right now, the plan is to wait until we meet before deciding to commit or not. My 'SO' is making a very big exception for me, when we originally met I learned that he wasn't interested in LDR's, thought they could never work and were a waste of time.\n\nHe is considering doing it for me and during or after summer its either going to work out or not. My question is.. Has anyone ever been in this type of situation before and how did it work out?\n\nOh, I think its worth noting that neither of us are looking for anyone else. We are committed to meeting each other, its that part that comes after which is a bit shaky.", "summary": "LDR in a 'trial' relationship. Decision to commit won't be made until after we've met. Has anyone had previous experience?"}
{"id": "t3_2ui6ov", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my Girlfriend 8 months, cheated on me while I am away at work.", "post": "So my job sent me to Canada for shift work. 2 weeks on and then I get 1 week off. I gave my girlfriend the keys to my apartment to check my mail and house sit. I told her she could have her best friend over to watch Netflix or what not while I was gone but that was it. Well 5 days into my assignment she has her friend and they invite a guy friend over. They all start drinking. She skyped me about an hour early hiding the fact that she had anyone else over but her best friend. Well her best friend calls her ex boyfriend over and they start arguing. This leaves their guy friend and my girl friend in my room together. The guy tells her that he has a lot of emotions for her and they start making out, he then takes off her pants and they have sex for about a minute before my girlfriend said she couldn't do it. Then she gets up to go to the bathroom and he follows her and says yes she can. He put it back in her, but she stopped it again after about a minute. He then asked if she could blow him then, and she said she felt bad so she did for about 30 seconds before she stopped again. She called me right after and told me how sorry she was, and she didn't know it was going to happen. She told me alcohol was definitely a factor, and the whole ordeal has made her realize how much she loved me. She said she told him to stop because she knew it was so wrong, but it was hard to get him off of her. What do I do? This was in my house while I was gone in Canada! How do I look past this?", "summary": "Girlfriend cheated on me in my bed while I was in Canada. She asked the guy to stop, but it still hurts. What do I do to look past this?"}
{"id": "t3_thbv3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have 90 days until my downstairs neighbour, who I've had to get a restraining order against is evicted. If you were me, what would you do?", "post": "Basically, I've had to get an AVO (Apprehended Violence Order) against my downstairs neighbour. We live in a really old building with little to no insulation, so noise travels *really* easily. \n\nBut he takes offense to the smallest things at really random times (11am, Sunday morning, being on the phone with my Dad and wandering around the apartment was cause for a 7 minute tirade in the stairwell about how I'm a dumb white cunt who's always walking around. I don't know if he expects me to teleport or hover between rooms, but unfortunately, I can't do either.\n\nHe's threatened me a couple of times (raised fist, prevented me from exiting the building, tried to kick down my apartment door the other day) the last time he did it, I'd been watching TV with a few friends (normal volume) - no-one else has ever witnessed these events before and they encouraged me to call the police. Police suggested I get an AVO, and so I did.\n\nNext day, I call the real estate and say basically, okay, look. I need to leave or this guy does, because I am terrified of him, and this seems to be escalating. They decide to evict him (he's being served papers today) but with 90 days notice, I'm basically going to have to live with an enraged junkie for three months.\n\nSo, I'm not sure what I can do to either protect myself, should I just move out and bear the cost of breaking lease five months early.. Do I get a new giant bro housemate, because my current one has basically fucked off to her friends house and left me to deal with the whole mess... or do you guys have another idea?", "summary": "Girl vs Junkie - asked to be released from my lease, they decided to evict him instead. But not for 90 days. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_3o6gg3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] have a crush on [22F] who is currently dating a friend of mine [22M]", "post": "Throwaway because she knows my username.\n\nSo I met this girl about a year and a half ago, and we were acquaintances. We didn't really talk to each other much, but we knew each other since we worked at the same place but different departments.\n\nAbout 10 months ago, a good friend of mine begins dating this girl. I don't really care at the time since I don't know her.\n\nAbout 3 months ago, I get switched departments at work and we are working very closely together. We immediately click and become best friends overnight. About a month in I start developing feelings towards this girl and I have to tell myself that I should ignore them.\n\nNow its been 2 more months, and when I hang out with both of them together or when I just hang out with her it slowly begins to tear me apart because I want to tell her how I feel. I don't know what to do and I really don't want to risk either relationship and its really beginning to get to me. What should I do?", "summary": "I like a girl who is currently dating a good friend of mine. I don't want to lose either one of the relationships or put myself through the emotional pain anymore. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_24616w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22M] am on a break with my gf [20F] after ~3 years, until I figure out a couple of things, and I could really use some help", "post": "I really loved my girlfriend. I did. We were best friends.\n\nBut I'm having a ton of trouble reconciling that I met her so early on in life. She's my first serious relationship, and we talked about getting married etc. She's on-board with the idea, and I just couldn't continue the relationship because I wasn't sure.\n\nWhat I'm trying to figure out is whether or not I'm ok with settling down so early. I already feel like maybe I'm missing something. All my friends have gone on streaks of dating a lot, nothing serious, and a lot of flings. I've never had that in life. I always was looking for a relationship. But now that I have one, I feel trapped. I feel that if I commit to this now, I'm giving up the chance to ever be able to have that fun freedom in my 20s. Part of me wants to experience that, but on the other hand what if I'm letting the best one go just to go experience shitty relationships?\n\nI always thought that I'd end up with a physically fit, active girl. My girlfriend simply isn't. She's never done any real physical activity, and doesn't have much urge to do so. I still find her attractive, but I'm worried that she'll gain weight the older she gets. I know that beauty fades with age... but I still want to be crazy attracted to her. I am attracted to her now more just because of our relationship than her physical appearance. If she did lose a bit of weight and was active, I know she would be that crazy hot girl I've always wanted... but I can't force her to become active, and I also don't want to bank on that happening.\n\nI'm just really caught up in \"what-if\"s right now, and it's killing me inside. Am I missing out on something if I stay with her?", "summary": "Will I resent not having dated more people later in life, and/or am I potentially letting the right one go just to see what else is out there?"}
{"id": "t3_gf0g8", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Should I give my father money for rent?", "post": "Need some help, reddit.\n\nMy father, pushing 60, just asked my brother and I for money to pay for 3 months worth of back due rent. Total: $1,350.\n\nA little backstory: he used to work for a large multinational but got canned about 8 years ago. He got severance and he decided to start his own business with it, which failed in about a year. He spent all of his severance on it. He now has another business which is obviously not yielding enough cash. He's also currently looking for a job.\n\nHe's re-married, to someone about 5 years my senior... She doesn't really work, but does some free-lance stuff, so \"she's been paying the bills\", according to my Dad. She recently took $30,000 from an older family member of hers to buy a car. She also frequently travels by invitation from this family member. (e.g. this family member pays for it...)\n\nI know that I will not *loan* my father any money, but just give it to him if my wife and I decide to do so. However, I don't see an end to this unless he makes some drastic changes. It seems he believes he will get different results by doing the same thing over and over, and frankly I don't see that he's *killing himself* to improve his situation.\n\nHowever, if I don't help him out, he will probably not pay rent and get kicked out. He also won't have money for a new place...\n\nWhat's also interesting to note is that my father , when he was doing well, gave his father (my grandfather) money every month to help *him* out. I don't want to do the same: I have my own family and life to take care of.\n\nSo, reddit, what to do? Anyone else been in a similar situation? Your thoughts, please?", "summary": "My dad asked my brother and I for money to pay for due rent, what's the best way for me to help in the long term so this does not continue?"}
{"id": "t3_h4gaq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So Reddit, how many of you are religious?", "post": "According to recent surveys, 83 percent of Americans claim to belong to a religious denomination, 40 percent claim to attend services nearly every week or more, and 58 percent claim to pray at least weekly.  \n\nI, myself, am agnostic.  I grew up with a mother that taught me to search for my own spirituality and visit whatever churches I wanted to.  Through my teen years I went to various churches, and none of them made any sense to me, so I just decided to roll with the world that was around me.\n\nMost people I encounter don't *seem* religious, (whatever that means) so those statistics seem a bit off to me.", "summary": "Who gives big ups to their main man God? (or Goddess.  or Gods.  or Buddah.  ..or you know...you get it.)"}
{"id": "t3_rf7we", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "If the record industry makes huge profits by taking advantage of the insecurities of teenagers/young adults, is it then in their best interest to keep these groups insecure?", "post": "Couldn't help but have the thought cross my mind while hearing a One Direction song on the radio. There seems to be three main messages prevalent on top 40 pop stations these days: The sexualization of women, the urge to party away your problems, and you are beautiful and perfect in every way. \n\nI would argue two of these messages are marketed towards a specific audience: Insecure teenagers/young adults. The urge to party away your problems provides an escape from insecurity. The message of \"You are beautiful!\" would never work on an audience, unless that audience needed reinsurance of their self worth.\n\nThe third message works to generate the insecurities that make the other two messages effective. I think that the sexualization of women helps to instill insecurity, as obviously not all women fit that model. If I were to be told that a square jaw and blue eyes were the epitome of beauty and I did not have either, I would obviously feel worse about myself. And a song that suggested a way to forget this, or told me otherwise would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "The music industry is both generating and feeding off of the insecurity of it's audience, from what I have seen. Is this planned? Or is it just happy circumstance?"}
{"id": "t3_2zhdyd", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I am in love with someone I hardly know.", "post": "I knew this person in high school and we were both interested in each other. It never worked out although I have had dreams about this person ever since (8 years of dreams). They aren't sexual dreams, but this is really, really wearing on me. In the dreams I am very happy to be with her and when I wake up I am devastated. The worst part is that I am currently in a relationship and know that this other girl is single. I went for lunch with her a little over a year ago to see how she was doing and we seemed to both enjoy ourselves. I have not pursued this relationship because I am in a fairly good relationship and feel delusional thinking this \"dream\" relationship could work out.", "summary": "I am currently in a relationship of three years and I am secretly in love with a girl I knew 8 years ago. I literally dream about her."}
{"id": "t3_toufm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Would it be unethical to invade and democratize a relatively stable, but tyrannical dictatorship if there were no chance of pain or casualties on either side, purely for the purpose of freeing the population?", "post": "Basically, imagine 50 years from now, we have flawless and painless non-lethal warfare technologies that are all remotely controlled, like warm flying blobs that gently, politely, and safely scoop up any resisting combatants and deliver them to a resort-like minimum security prison with comfortable, dorm-like amenities. There they would be rehabilitated for the most part, and soon after released. No interrogations or intelligence gathering unless someone volunteers... although some regime leadership members might face war-crimes/crimes against humanity charges, etc., but with no chance of death penalty. \n\nAlso, the entire purpose of the invasion would be to establish democracy. \n\nEach robot fighter on our side would be controlled by a human, so no robot automated decisions, and every action of every US robot is recorded live from a hundred little cameras and released live to the public on a million streaming channels, with no chance to censor anything. \n\nAfter a decade of infrastructure improvements, education, and constitution writing in cooperation with local elected representatives we'd leave.  \n\nOne last point - to those that say this prevents their self-determination as a people, I just want to clarify that in this scenario, they aren't self-determined to begin with, as they are controlled by a single hereditary dictator. The idea would be to make self-determination possible through democracy.", "summary": "100% humane execution of the operation by combining remote controlled robots and super-safe and zero-pain-generating non-lethal warfare technology, nation building, and departure after ten years."}
{"id": "t3_twsne", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Some problems with caffeine", "post": "So, I am absolutely a caffeine abuser.  For about 7 months I was drinking at least 1 gram of caffeine a day.  I decided to stop drinking caffeine and stop drinking alcohol cold turkey.  It has worked for the last 2 weeks.  Though it is starting to bug me again.  Alcohol I am indifferent about, there have been times when I wanted a good brew, but it is easy to ignore.\n\nFor me, caffeine is not easy to ignore.  I have serious headaches still that have not subsided.  While I have no evidence other than experience, I believe caffeine makes me perform better.  More focused.  More energy.  Work longer hours.  Work harder.  I can't see why I wouldn't want to drink caffeine.  On the flip side, I realize, I was drinking a ton of caffeine and that isn't healthy.\n\nA bit of a history lesson, I have been drinking caffeine heavily for about 10 plus years.  It has gotten me through so much.  I am a little confused.  \n\nShould I go back to drinking caffeine or should I stay away?  I think part of this issue is I am not sure if I can keep my intake in moderation.", "summary": "Abused caffeine (over 1 gram a day).  Stopped for two weeks.  Want to go back as I think I perform better, but not sure if I should"}
{"id": "t3_zsi9d", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is something making people smaller/mature later?", "post": "Preface: Let me know if this fits better in r/askscience, I feel like it's too speculative for the subreddit and didn't want to get e-lynched.  \n  \nI'm now a senior in high school and I feel like my class and the classes below me look prepubescent still compared to those of my parents and even siblings. I'm not sure if it's just that when I was younger I thought that seniors in high school looked older than they actually did and that my class looks just the same as the other class but I'm wondering. I know that a class of 500 students is not a huge sample size, but when my brother was a senior five years ago he was probably the fifth to tenth tallest person in his class at 6'6\". In my class, there is one kid who is over 6'6\"- he's 6'8\". Yes 6'8\" is tall but I've gone to school with him for many years and know that both of his grandfathers are over 7'0 tall, his father is over 7'0 tall, and his mother is 6'8\". He suspects that he is done growing since he's been the same height since freshman year- so this 6'8\" seems short for his genetics (note that I know nothing about genetics past punnet squares). I also realize that five years is not nearly long enough time for such a drastic change to be taking effect, and that this may just be all coincidental. Now, I look back at my parents' yearbooks and see kids with full beards, at my school it is common to sport a beard if you're able to grow one (ie my hideous chinstrap). There are only a few kids with more than peach fuzz it seems. I'm not trying to be \"lol I'm so manly and everyone else is prepubescent\" (my noodle arms would like to disagree)- I feel like if I were placed in high school ten years ago that I would look like a completely average senior, and yet people tell me I look like I'm 25.", "summary": "Are people getting smaller and maturing at a later age or is it the same as it has always been and I just feel that way because of how I perceived older kids while I was a younger kid?    "}
{"id": "t3_ybxwx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Good day Reddit. What strange or unusual things  have made your day?", "post": "So yesterday I was on my way back to home in pretty empty train, I was prepared for this boring ride so I started solving my Rubik`s cube and putted my headphones. Out of curiosity I took a glimpse around and there were plenty of seats left and so I continued solving my puzzle.\n \nAfter second time I solved that cube and started a new run suddenly a pretty quite girl sits in front of me, I didnt stared or anything just saw a nice girl in front of me (usually everybody is so scared of me and doesnt even sit near to me). At first it didnt bothered me but when I had another look over her I just continued my puzzle.\n\nIt wasnt very warm day something about 19 degrees Celsius (66\u00b0F) but it didnt stopped me from wearing a shirt and shorts when most of the people around weared jeans and hoodies. The girl in front of me weared nice brown leather jacked and after a while she started to take it off, I didnt mind and while she was searching for her thin, brown with white stripes sweater, I took one long stealthy glimpse of her and immediately turned back to my cube.(pretty weird huh? yep it shore is).\n\nRest of the ride was relatively boring until I took big yawn like [this] and our eyes met where suddenly me and her just turned our heads like it didnt happen. I felt pretty embarrassed at that moment but I didnt care much about it after all. At the end I could ask her something but I didnt had courage and something inside me was saying that there is her boyfriend waiting at the end so I just sited there and listened to music. \n\nWhen I got of the train she was still walking alone and after a while our our ways parted. Only after a while I realized that that one girl which I saw for the first time and didnt even know made my day by just siting in front of me on a train. Probably I`m just a weirdo and still Reddit share your stories of how someone and/or something has made your day.", "summary": "Nice girl on pretty empty train sited in front of me made my day just siting in front of me (weird? i know). Share your stories of how someone or something has made your day."}
{"id": "t3_2u7jkp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (18M) with GF (18) at a loss", "post": "My GF and I have been together for a little over 3 years now and are both freshman in college at different universities hours away. \n\nEverything was good for the most part during our first semesters away from each other, but as this second semester has started things have been different. We recently nearly broke up, over a number of things (without sounding like a jerk, they were all problems that she caused). I explained that I needed time to think about things and think about the relationship and eventually decided that I would be ok with seeing how things went in the next couple of weeks., and here we are.\n\nShe said she is depressed being so far away and jealous that she has to live at home while I am away and enjoying my time here. \n\nAlthough I really love this girl and have always been willing to do anything and everything to make her happy, recently I have been having thoughts about ending it for a couple reasons: I have always been a near-perfect boyfriend (something she has also expressed) while she has always brought problems into the relationship as a cause of her own insecurities etc., I have questioned whether or not I would just be happier without her and without a LDR so I can enjoy my time her in college without the stress of an LDR, and finally, I do not want to eventually resent her and resent the fact that I never got the 'full college experience'. \n\nI care about this girl but I do recognize that I need to do what is best for me and for my own happiness as well as hers. The LDR can be a lot to deal with, especially on top of school and work. I hope I haven't sounded like an insensitive person.\n\nI should also add the 'problems' I spoke of: First she was talking to her ex to try and make me jealous, then told me to have a nice life without her when I told her I was going somewhere for spring break with my friends, but then apologized for this. And finally, gave another guy that is probably interested in her her phone number (which may seem like nothing but on top of the other two previously mentioned, and considering these all happened within 2 months, it got to me).\n\nThank you", "summary": "Confused as to what to do with my LDR of three years as our relationship gets more strenuous in college."}
{"id": "t3_34dl09", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When should I (20/F) start revealing my crazy side to my boyfriend (19/M) of a week?", "post": "He's a classmate. He's never had a girlfriend before.\nHe is the sweetest guy I've ever met, he compliments me a lot, he is handsome, but shy in a cute way, and very smart. \nI'm into him. \n\nI have been with 10+ guys, usually above 27 year old. I have been in abusive relationships, I have let them treat me very bad, because I was messed up and I believed that it is what I deserve. \nI used to cut myself and I have very visible scars on my thighs, from time to time I still cut. \nI'm on an emotional roller coaster, and when I'm in a depressive episode, I want to be able to rely on him, but at the same time I dont want to overwhelm him or push him away. \nPlus I hate myself from time to time and I have no idea how he can be attracted to me.\n\nI have never felt so happy with someone so right. \nIf I show him what I'm really like, I'm afraid he'll run, but if I don't, I will push him away, because I won't feel understood.", "summary": "I'm with a very nice guy, I'm his first girlfriend, but I have been with many guys, I cut myself and I go depressive and/or crazy sometimes. Wondering what I should do to not push him away."}
{"id": "t3_2orkul", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going off-piste whilst skiing", "post": "So, I'm currently in Finland with my parents on a skiing trip - first time here, can't speak a single word of finnish, let alone understand when it's being spoken.\n\nThe resort where I'm skiing is pretty boring tbh, maybe 1/3 of slopes are actually open and the ones that are, take maybe 5-10 minutes to reach the bottom (if you're going slowly). As a result of a lack of things to do, I decide it would be great to go off-piste (against my parents, insurers and slope signage's advice).\n\nThe deep snow is not a problem for me, I can handle most conditions pretty well, **BUT** I often make the rookie error of 'leaping before you look', and found myself stopping just short of a small cliff. In most cases I probably would've tried to land on the snow below the cliffy part, but fallen trees gave me the middle branch and started laughing. So with a cliff on one side and fuck all on the other I try my best to turn around, and go the other way.\n\nThat went good, I got pointed in the direction I wanted to go and carried on my merry way. I got to a point where I could make it to one of the closed off runs, and nearly got there without any mishaps... *Nearly*\n\nI misjudged where the new cliff ended, and went arse over tit into the snow below, with my back stopping just short of one of those, evil fallen trees.\n\nNever in my life have I ever been so glad to be on a marked ski run.", "summary": "I got bored skiing, went off piste, got stuck and almost back flopped onto a tree, and prayed to all the gods to not kill me"}
{"id": "t3_4rxdh1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26F] with my SO [26M]: found facebook photos (non-sexy) of exgirlfriends saved on his computer", "post": "I found a folder of around 8 pictures, all one of each of his gfs on his computer. They were totally not the sexiest ones. When I lurked them on FB, they definitely had \"better\" photos but he had saved all of it, one of each ex gf, straight from FB on one day. To be clear, they were not photos of when they were together etc. they were all basically old profile pics of the gfs. \n\nI spoke to my friends about this and they think this is extremely weird and I should bring it up. Do men generally do this? What about you?? I would like to get as many opinions as possible.", "summary": "Found non-sexy photos of ex girlfriends on my SO's computer--all downloaded from facebook. Is this creepy?"}
{"id": "t3_32t1ra", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How long did it take you to get over your first boyfriend/girlfriend?", "post": "My boyfriend broke up with me before Christmas and I was literally TORN to pieces, and as much as I keep telling myself I'm over him, I'm not. He was my first boyfriend and maybe that's the reason I keep trying to stay in contact, but he wants nothing to do with me any more. And it breaks my heart.   \n\n We were best friends from 15 years old and then we went out for 2 years until I was 18, he was 19. Shit happens and he moved away and didn't want the bother of a long distance relationship. He wouldn't answer my phone calls, he didn't reply to my letters, he just didn't give a shit. So I thought going to his new city would fix everything. Spent money on flights and trains and we were reunited and it felt like normal again, I met his new friends and loved them all!! Had the most amazing few days and cried when I had to leave. He texted my mum to tell her he thought I was wonderful and that all his friends liked me a lot and that he missed me every day. Life was back on track.   \nThe weeks went by and things dragged again, the same stuff happened until one night, he texted me that he'd cheated on me and if that wasn't bad enough, he 'told his mum we weren't a thing anymore'. \n\nIt's now April and I can't stop thinking about him. I keep trying to stay in contact and he says we can be friends but he's being so dry when i talk to him, probably for my own good. I've kissed a few boys since and had cuddles with a long time 'crush' after a night out but nothing gives me even nearly the same feeling as seeing him even just smile does.\n\nHow much longer do I have to go of this?! And how can I speed up the process because by the looks of his social media he is definitely over me and has been for a long time. I hate that I must've been so much more emotionally invested than him for 2 whole years!!!", "summary": "boyfriend dumped me when he went to another country for university, I'm ripped to pieces and don't know how to get over him."}
{"id": "t3_3ia9p6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20f) and the guy I've been seeing ( 28m) seem to have different ideas on dating. I'm not sure how to work with it.", "post": "So I met this new guy on okcupid. Been seeing him for a little over a month.  He's clearly quite a bit older than I and far more experienced than i. He says he wants something serious and to settle down, thing is, he has this very odd view on dating that I just can't sync up with. \n\nHere it is: He refuses to consider it a relationship until 3 months in, not so bad, BUT during that first three months, it's okay to see other people amd go on dates with other people and who knows what. He still considers this monogamy. \n\nThing is, I can't tell if I'm comfortable with that. I don't casually date. And because of that, I can't really get myself to want to meet anyone much otherwise. I mean he has caught my interest and I really like getting to know him. \n\nIs this just a dude trying to be a player? How do i tell him this whole ordeal makes me uncomfortable without seeming like I want this new guy to be my boyfriend? \n\nIt's really killing my self esteem. He's made comments about how he doesn't know about dating me because i'm too young and I'm \"not nerdy enough\" which I think is absolute bullshit and i have no idea what to do with it. \n\nAlso, I feel like after seeing someone for a month you at least decide if they have your attention by then, right?", "summary": "I'm not interested in being in a non- monogamy relationship, and I can't tell if the guy I'm seeing is just trying to get away with sleeping around and just seeing me as nothing with potential"}
{"id": "t3_43jo85", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Would this be a bold move?", "post": "I found out from one of my friends that a girl I know has a minor crush on me, she thinks I'm \"smart and cute.\" But to say I know her is a stretch, as I don't know much about her and we've barely talked. That being said, from what I've seen of her interactions with others, I've always thought that she could be an 'ideal' girlfriend. She has a lot of the characteristics I am looking for (an interest in music, computer programming, etc). Now, we're scheduled to meet at some point in the next week; I'm going to show her (one-on-one) some software since she expressed an interest in learning how it works. I don't feel like that is the right context to try any of the usual things and up until this point our texting has been strictly professional. Here is where my question begins, I found her OKCupid profile (according to their match things we're a solid 87%), would it be too bold to send her a 'fancy seeing a girl like you in a place like this'", "summary": "Is it too bold to message a girl you barely know through their OKCupid profile if you feel like texting has become 'boring?'*"}
{"id": "t3_3epclq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend (23f) is bisexual. For some reason I (23m) cannot deal with it and I don't know what to do. I have nothing against gay people at all but for some reason her being bi endlessly bothers me", "post": "I don't even know how to explain it. Gay people are cool, no problems with them, I'm glad they can all marry now. But, my girlfriend is bisexual and for months now it's just been bothering me. She has girls nights sometimes with her friends and they're all lesbian and it's scary but she promises me nothing happens. Thinking of her kissing or having sex with another girl bothers me for some reason, but, like I said, gay people are cool and I don't have any issues with them other than her. I'll answer any questions anyone has about me or my relationship. I just need help of some kind like how to deal with it", "summary": "For some reason it endlessly bothers me that my girlfriend is bisexual and I need help in accepting that she loves me like she says and our relationship has nothing to do with it."}
{"id": "t3_295iet", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Feeling like I have wobbly knees?", "post": "Hey guys, I'm not a pro runner, but I wouldn't say I'm a beginner either. I've been running on and off for a couple years, more seriously though lately...I've had my fair share of shin splints and other aches but lately I've been dealing with a different pain, not quite sure what it is, wondering if you guys could help\n\nAfter using this dumbass calf machine at my gym (totally must've used it wrong or something) my legs were really sore all the way up to my knees, my leg knee in particular. As the soreness faded I started to run again in which I realized the pain in my knee was still there. On my left knee it began to feel as if there was like a hole? at the bottom of the cap and while running it makes it feel as if my knee won't be able to support my lower leg to land in place. \n\nThe only thing I can think of is that I messed up my meniscus, but my knee isn't swollen, I can walk and work out completely fine. I gave it about a week of rest from all exercise and went on my first run today. I felt completely fine for 2.75 miles and around there slowly started to feel that wobblyness come back so I just stopped running there and walked. \n\nAnyone have any ideas? I know, I really know I need to see a doctor, but are there any tips or ideas with what's going on?", "summary": "feels like theres a hole on the lower edge of my knee cap/ lack of support in my lower leg causing achey knees?"}
{"id": "t3_1aktkb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[21M] girlfriend[20F] won't stop talking about previous sexual encounters", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for about 7 months. I'm a little hung up about her past. She has slept with 13 other guys and that is a bit overwhelming for me. I lurk in this subreddit a lot, and I've seen all the posts that deal with this issue. I know that this is my problem and not hers. I try my hardest not to let it effect our relationship, and I've done a really good job so far, but its getting really hard to do when she brings up her past sex experiences.\n\nI have told her on 3 different occasions that I'd prefer not to know those things. I express this each time she mentions something. Last night she told me a story about a time she had anal sex with another guy and that she didn't enjoy it. I got a little mad that she brought it up. She apologized, and i said that its okay. I'm still pretty pissed though.\n\nWe have never had a real discussion on my feelings about her past. Its hard for me to explain why these things bother me. I guess I feel jealous that she has tried stuff with other guys that she won't try with me. I know I'm not the best shes ever had. I know she has done way kinkier stuff with other guys. I know I'm not the cutest or the biggest guy shes been with. I feel like I'm just number 14. It just hurts. She has even admitted that I'm not her best lover. It was my fault for asking though. It kills my ego. I have been with a few other people too but she has had a much more colorful sex life than me. I know its not logical to think this way but its hard to beat out this gut feeling.\n\nI don't know what to do. She can't seem to stop talking about her past sex life. I know i need to have a larger discussion with her about this but I don't know how to bring it up or what to say.", "summary": "My[21M] girlfriend[20F] won't stop talking about her past sexual encounters. I'm just looking for advice or comments from people who have been in the same boat."}
{"id": "t3_1k64rw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (30M) am having second thoughts about my GF (27F) of 1.5 years because my desire for children has diminished.", "post": "I've been dating my GF for 1.5 years. It's been amazing. She moved in with me 2 months ago after 13 months of living an hour apart and although we initially fought a lot, we're starting to get the hang of sharing the same space. \n\nShe gets worried about things easily and always thinks about the worst case scenario. I'm working a great job right now as a pharmacist. She is finishing her last year of a Doctorate in Psychology and probably has 3 years before actually starting her career. She would prefer not to have kids until that point, but I absolutely DO NOT want kids until she has finished. It's very important to me that she has a career.\n\nShe is not on birth control so I use condoms. She always wants to have sex without them (so do I), but I insist. I feel like she interprets this as I don't want kids ever. When we met I was a 1-2 kids guy and she was a 2-5 kids girl. However, now I'm completely open to not having kids and am really soul searching about whether or not I want them or not.\n\nI enjoy the life I currently live and don't know if I want that to change. I love my GF, but I want her all to myself. I want to be able to have fun and be spontaneous. She loves to travel and so do I. Most of my buddies have kids and I never get to hangout with them any more. It just seems like so much work that I'm not interested in.\n\nI have no idea how/when to talk to her about this and know it will break her heart. She's an independent woman who knows what she wants. We've worked hard to keep this relationship together, but I worry that this would be a dividing point between us.\n\nThanks for any input.", "summary": "Love my GF, may be changing my mind on whether I want kids, don't know how/when to broach the subject."}
{"id": "t3_3houy7", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Need to verify if a housing law in Portland, OR is correct or has been turned into a \"law\" when it's really a guideline.", "post": "So I'm on Facebook asking if there's a place to rent in the Portland, OR housing classifieds.  We have a few kids, enough that people think that you cannot put more than 2 kids per room for, say, a two bedroom house.  There seems to be a section in the housing code that they should follow the \"2+1\" rule for renting.  However, when reading the code, this seems to be even more of a guideline than a rule, and is even mentioned as such by the mayor in a PDF I found dated a few years ago.\n\nWith housing so tight and people failing to find housing for one reason or another (and I plan to move my family up in a couple of months.  I work in Portland right now), it would be nice to be able to come at this problem to show landlords that this isn't a law but a guideline, and should be treated as such.", "summary": "Trying to show that the \"2+1\" \"law\" for renting in Portland, OR is a guideline and not law."}
{"id": "t3_3tlgya", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] want to date my neighbor [21 F], how should I go about making a move?", "post": "I have lived in the same house for about 7 years with my parents and my neighbors have lived next to us for about the same amount of time. I always said hi to them outside but never really talked to them much. It wasn't until a few weeks ago that they threw a party and invited me that I got to know their daughter.\n\nWe started talking and hit it off almost immediately, and I invited her out to a party on that same night on the spot and she accepted. We left right away and enjoyed the party, but it was a friendly vibe, no advances from either of us. We had a lot of fun so I made plans to see her again the week after and she accepted. \n\nWe went bar hopping and met up with some of my friends at the bar and we danced a little and had fun. Her body language was kinda not all there so I didn't make much of an attempt to keep pulling her to dance or anything. On the way back home the conversation never stopped and we talked for the whole ride home.\n\nI invited her out again this week and she accepted, this time will most likely be just the two of us. This is gonna be our third time hanging out and I feel like I should pull a move before I friendzone myself by being too much of a pussy. I am a little scared because we're neighbors and if she rejected me I'll have to keep seeing her occasionally. I kinda don't want to lose her because I've liked hanging out with her and she's super fun, but I don't wanna lose my chance because I find her very attractive. How should I go about pulling my move? Should I pull a move at all?", "summary": "I like my neighbor and want to pull a move, but I am scared to make things awkward. How should I go about making my move?"}
{"id": "t3_2rrgom", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Using untouched childhood \"investment\" account funds for other purposes. Is this a terrible plan?", "post": "Let me preface this by stating that I know virtually nothing about investing/the stock market, and I have unfortunately not been faced with \"real life\" yet, therefore I am not too great with money management--but I'm trying.\n\nI am a recent college graduate (graduated with zero student debt) who is currently unemployed. I have an unpaid internship lined up with very good prospects that it will turn into a paid position after I complete it, and am actively searching for other part-time work to supplement income in the mean time. I am currently living off of a monthly allowance that my parents send me until I secure a job (covers rent and utilities, but barely any left over). I have about ~$800 in credit card debt due to me being financially stupid.\n\nRecently I remembered that as a child my parents set aside about 2k in (I think) a Charles Schwab account for me to \"invest,\" but really didn't offer much guidance and it's never actively been invested. I know it existed in my name, but the last time I spoke to my parents about it I was probably ~15 years old (my dad gave me some papers about it, but I don't know where they are).\n\nAnyways, my goal this year is to become fully self-sufficient and pay off my credit card debt in full, as well as building savings and being overall more financially intelligent. \n\nMy question is, should I seek out this 2k and use it to pay off my credit debt? I considered withdrawing it all (I've inquired to my dad regarding getting more information about it), paying off my debt, taking care of some car repairs I've been putting off, and then starting a savings/emergency fund. Is this a good idea?", "summary": "I have some money, which has been untouched since childhood, in an investment account. Should I find and withdraw it to pay off some debt and build savings?"}
{"id": "t3_4tk6ed", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my boyfriend [31M] 2 months, he wants me to dress more \"maturely\"", "post": "I'm 23, graduated college and have been working full time ever since. Despite my age, a lot of people tell me that I look like a high schooler. I guess it doesn't help that I'm petite and 5'2\". In terms of dress, if I had to describe it, I guess it would be a mix of H&M and Urban Outfitters.\n\nMy boyfriend is 31 and he looks it. His style is more Uniqlo and Banana Republic. I don't have a problem with anything about him or us, but our age difference seems to bother him a lot, especially since I look so much younger.\n\nLast week we went to a beach concert and he said some of his friends might meet up with us. I had my hair up in two buns (think Baby Spice) and wore a loose top and maxi skirt. In the end, we didn't end up meeting most of his friends because it was so crowded and couldn't find them.\n\nTonight he mentioned how he wasn't digging my hair last week, nor my outfit, and he said that I looked \"so young.\" He mentioned that he was a bit hesitant for me to meet his friends because of all of this. He said he is afraid of what they might think of him dating someone so much younger than him, that they will judge him negatively. He asked me to \"doll up\" more whenever we do something with his friends and dress more \"maturely\" (not his exact word, but that's the best I can think of).\n\nI told him I would see what I could do, but I'm just not sure what to make of this. Of course I want to make a good impression on his friends, but I also feel like the way he wants me to dress isn't my style, and I don't want to feel like I'm not being \"me.\"\n\nIs there any way to compromise? What would you do/how would you react?", "summary": "I look younger than I am, my boyfriend looks 31. He wants me to dress up more whenever I we spend time with him and his friends because he thinks that our obvious age difference appearance will cause judgement."}
{"id": "t3_2s3lyt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21M] need some help meeting some new people after my breakup from [22M].", "post": "I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years. I'm having a difficult time, not because of being single per say, but because my two best friends go to college 2 hours away, and most of my other friends are better friends with my ex so they are kind of tipping me out.\n\nI've done grindr and tinder, and none of them have really led anywhere. I don't like to have sex with random people, I'd rather just get drunk or make out or whatever. \n\nNow that I'm back in school, what would you guys suggest for finding new friends, and maybe on down the road, a new boyfriend? Any advice?", "summary": "been single for 4 months in junior year of college. Need help finding new friends and maybe a new boyfriend down the road."}
{"id": "t3_286hsf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(20F) girlfriend and I (20m) split up 2 months ago. Saw her by chance today and she wants to hang out before she moves.", "post": "I'll keep this short as possible, anyways, I went to a restaurant tonight with my brother and when we got inside I saw my ex sitting at a table, to try and make it as less awkward as possible, I asked to be seated on there other side, so I wouldn't have to be \"around\" her.\n\nI order my food and step outside for a cigarette and as soon as I do that, she comes outside to talk to me. We chat for a little and she explains that she didn't want things to be weird and that she thought the reason o switched tables was because she assumed I hated her, which isn't true. So we talk for a little and she then tells me That's she is moving soon because mom got a new job. She then says that she would like to hang out one last time before she leaves. I am uneasy about this, so my question is, should I do it or not?", "summary": "girlfriend broke up with me 2 months ago, we saw each other and she wants to hang out. Don't know what to do"}
{"id": "t3_37ol8g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17F] told my bf [17 M] last week that I couldn't stand a relationship without sex", "post": "This is my first post here, so bear with me. \n\nLast week my boyfriend and I were talking about prom, and somehow conversation got around to sex. He asked what I would do if he said he wanted to be abstinent until marriage, and I told him that I'd have to think about it, but that it probably wouldn't work out between us. I never thought of it as a serious question, but then he got concerned that sex meant more to me than a relationship with him, and I spent 30 minutes convincing him that I loved him a lot and that I would want to make it work.\n\nI already knew that he has a lower sex drive than I do, which made me feel even worse after the conversation when he tried to turn me on. It felt forced, and I told him that he shouldn't be doing anything that he didn't want to do because of me, and he stopped but he still seemed sad and disappointed. Now I'm just worried that he'll be faking it when we have sex next. I don't want him to do anything he isn't comfortable with, but when I tell him that, he doesn't really talk to me or reassure me that he won't.\n\nHas anyone been in a similar situation? What should I do to help him?", "summary": "told my bf I couldn't have a relationship without sex, now worried he might fake it just to stay with me."}
{"id": "t3_3g8f73", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] and my girlfriend [15F] have been in a long distance relationship for 3 months now and exactly two weeks from now I'm going to meet her for the first time! Advice please!", "post": "So exactly two weeks from now I will be physically meeting my girlfriend who lives in a different state about 13 hours away from me for the first time!\n\nI first met her in a Skype call that I was in with some of my friends. I added her and we started talking and then eight months later progressed to flirting and having witty conversations with each other and now here we are!\n\nWords cannot express how excited and nervous I am at the same time. I have had physical relationships before but I have never been able to connect on the same level with anyone before as I feel like I can with her! Even though we have only been together for 3 months and there is quite a large physical distance that separates us I care for her very deeply and since I met her I have felt the happiest I've ever been!  \n\nI was wondering if anyone would have any advice for me before I meet with her in person whether it be things that I should discuss with her before meeting her or anything else that you guys can come up with. I am incredibly excited and cannot wait to meet her! \n\nAny responses will be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "I will be physically meeting my long distance girlfriend of three months in two weeks and would like to hear any advice that you can give me before I meet her!"}
{"id": "t3_3mnz29", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18m] am unsure of how to interpret this situation with [19f].", "post": "Hey everyone,\n\nI know these questions are asked often, but like everyone else it seems I am unable to decipher this for myself.\n\nTo add a background: I have known this girl for 4/5 years (family friends) and we always got along. \n\nShe got out of a 2 year relationship about 4~months ago, she was broken up with, and I think isnt quite over it yet. Still not too sure about that.\n\nAnyways, we recently have hung about a fair amount and alot of people we know are pairing us up together in their minds and letting us know individually, never when we are together, and we have mentioned it briefly to each other.\n\nGenerally I feel like she is acting flirty, although I could be misinterpreting it. However, the thing I have an issue with is that occasionally she still mentions that she loves her ex, this could be her overselling/wanting some level of attention or deflecting from 'us', or she may still be getting over her ex. Additionally she mentions that she doesn't think she will date for a while.\n\nKnow, I know this seems like I'm reading too much into her 'flirtatious' actions and she may in fact just be acting friendly. But I wouldn't ask this if I thought that was all there was to it.\n\nSo my question is, am I completely off the track? Should I just leave her be? Or should I pay closer attention to the situation?\n\nGenerally cliche I know, but any help would be appreciated.", "summary": "Girl is flirtatious, but ended a long term relationship 4 months ago and may just be friendly and not at all interested"}
{"id": "t3_opqqb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can anyone help with with an apartment/subleasing issue?", "post": "I live in an apartment with 3 other girls, 1 of whom wants to move out in April, because she is graduating early. Our lease ends August 31 so she wants to find a sublet to take over her rent for the months that she isn't here, so that she doesn't have to pay while she isn't living here. She has put up some ads, and the only replies she has gotten back are by people that the other 2 girls and I do not really approve of. She is getting frustrated, because we said no to the 2 people she has found, and she is also pressuring us to choose the people we would rather not live with by making us feel guilty. She told us today that she tried to buy her way out of the lease. Didn't work. **Can anyone tell me if there is a way she could completely screw us over (meaning she leaves and doesn't pay and we end up having to pay her rent)?** All four of our names are on the lease. She cannot sublet to anyone without our knowledge because she requires our signatures to do so. She basically threatened us today by stating some random thing about small claims court which was fairly unclear to me, so I just want to have my bases covered with possible crap she could pull. Any help would be appreciated.", "summary": "Roommate wants to sublet, can't find a subleaser, is there any way she could screw the other roommates and me over?"}
{"id": "t3_gsqpu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "That boat stole my money!", "post": "Okay, so a boat didn't actually steal my money...\n\nThe other day I was on the Marine Atlantic ferry crossing from NS to NL and tried to use the bank machine. I requested the money, it took forever just saying that it was connecting. After so long I asked the workers if it was out of order, they said it must be. The machine then displayed, \"$xx Requested, $0 Dispensed\" The receipt came and said the same thing. Then I pulled a real bonehead move, not thinking about it, and tossed the receipt. Now I'm going back over my banking records and realizing the bank actually subtracted the money from my account.\n\nReddit, is there anyway I can get this money back, or is this one a write-off?", "summary": "Bank machine didn't give me money, money was still subtracted from account and I have no receipt. Can I get it back?"}
{"id": "t3_j2jpi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why do people make such a huge deal out of going through someone's e-mail? Who really cares?", "post": "The people who get caught up, that's who. If you're not getting caught doing something you're not supposed to, what's to be mad at?\n\nWhy do people decide to give each other their passwords for things like that to begin with? Because the people in question are trying to prove to one another that they can be trusted, and that they trust the other person.\n\n\"I've got nothing to hide from you, go ahead and check,\" is pretty standard nowadays it seems. The only people who seem to be getting mad about it are the people who are too DUMB to use that same e-mail account to do something deceitful!\n\nIt's not an invasion of privacy if you GAVE SOMEONE YOUR PASSWORD, strictly for the purpose of them entering it on-line, to log in to your e-mail account. Unless you made specific stipulations that they would only access your e-mail \"IF/WHEN....\" then you've got nothing to complain about. And, IF anyone feels like their SO is trying to impose such restrictions in the relationship.. it's not a good relationship.\n\nIf somebody reads your shit and you get caught up, OH WELL, should've covered your tracks better. So, before you begin whining about how so and so is to blame for this and that, remember that you were the one who did the bad thing, and while now you have all this anger because you feel your life is fucked, it's nobody's fault but your own.", "summary": "If you don't want someone to read your e-mail, don't give them your password. If you do give them your password, don't throw a fit about them when YOU were dumb enough to get caught up."}
{"id": "t3_2mqfkn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Would it be wrong for me[19F] to continue fucking my fuck buddy while im dating my crush?", "post": "Im starting to really like this guy that im dating and could see myself getting into a relationship with him. We're taking it nice and slow which I prefer when it comes to getting into a relationship. The only thing is that im constantly horny and masterbaiting does not do me justice. That is why i have this urge to have sex current fuck buddy just to get it out of my system. Although i cant help feel guilty because i really care for this guy that im dating. At the same time though, it's not like we're committed yet and i just need a way to satisfy my sexual needs lol. Idk...Im curious to hear what you guys have to say.", "summary": "currently dating a guy i really like and taking it slowly but has sexual needs and still wants to have sex with my fuck buddy"}
{"id": "t3_16xp62", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Girl I was dating very suddenly stopped being interested, what might I have done and is there anything I can do?", "post": "I met a girl about a month ago at a gig and she made it clear to my friend that she liked me a lot. \n\nI got it together and sorted it out to meet with her to get to know her, met with her a couple of times and it went really well both time and she showed the usual good signs that she was into me. After the second time I think I made the mistake of not texting her after which in hindsight I should have (I was seeing if she would text me first which wa s probably a stupid thing to do). Since then it seems like she's now suddenly uninterested, I don't know. \n\nI think its probably best that I move on to someone else but for the future can anyone say what I might have done?", "summary": "Girl who I was interested in said to my friend she really liked me, went on a couple of dates which seemed to go really well, suddenly seemed not interested, what might I have done?"}
{"id": "t3_4zey1q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What is a tactful way for me (22f) to communicate with my college roommate (20f) about various small issues.", "post": "I'm not gonna say I have a problem with conflict,  but I'm hesitant to bring these issues up with her due to the small nature and just..  Personally being uncomfortable. What would be a nice way to talk about a compromise so she doesn't feel attacked? I have to live with this person for four months. \n\nShe stays out late and comes home early, waking me up with shuffling around and slamming doors . \n\nEvery morning I don't have space to do my personal routine.  Brush teeth, shower, put in contacts, etc..  Because she pulls out this massive makeup kit that basically takes up the entire counter. Or takes 30+ minute showers that leave me with less than 20 minutes to shower and get to class. My class is at 8 and I already get up at 7 to get ready,  I don't exactly want to get up at Six just because she wants a relaxing shower. \n\nI'm a small person with a disorder where I'm always cold and this isn't helped with her continuously turning the ac to below 50. My room was at 51 when I left this morning.  That's ridiculous, right?\n\nFirst of all,  am I being ridiculous? Are these issues too small to bring up and I should just suck it up and buy blankets and get up at 6am?", "summary": "how to tactfully bring up small issues with college roommate such as long showers and freezing room. Are these valid concerns?"}
{"id": "t3_zmjwv", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "To block the ex on Facebook or not?", "post": "It's almost been a month since the breakup now. She's 28, I'm 26. I broke it off with her because of various personality problems that aren't relevant to this story.\n\nSince the breakup, she's posted Facebook updates every few days that are barbed, backhanded insults. We were poly (well, she was; I never dated outside of the relationship), and she'll post updates about how great her current partner is, especially compared to \"some of her exes,\" and referring to details of our relationship that I'm sure to get. I'm sure you've seen this sort of behavior, someone talking about how great things are now compared to *before,* how great it is to be finally understood, etc.\n\nSo I know it would be trouble to engage with this; it's probably what she wants. I've unsubscribed, so I can only see her updates when I look for them, which I do out of morbid curiosity every three or four days. Most of the time, they just cement my convictions about making the right choice in leaving her. Others, it makes me feel crappy, because sometimes the things she says have a grain of truth. There's a part of me that thinks not blocking her is a point of pride; I'm showing that I don't care. Another part of me thinks it might make me feel better to block her. And another, more vindictive, side hopes she'll see that she's been blocked and realize how crappy she is.", "summary": "When an ex is being crappy on Facebook, do you block them, or do you consider it the \"high road\" to leave them be?"}
{"id": "t3_34rcyr", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By Hysterically Laughing At A Middle Eastern Man's Name Thinking It Was My Friend", "post": "This FU happened on a college trip to London a couple years back. I went on a week college trip to London during winter break to see what our sister school in London looked like. Truthfully I went because I was 18 and wanted to party in a foreign area. \nIt was our last day in London and we were at Heathrow airport waiting to get on our flight back to the states. About 20 of us who went on the trip were all lined up to use those machines where you scan your passport to get your ticket. I was in the front of the group and a few of my friends were directly behind me in line. \nI go up to the machine and am figuring out how it works. Out of the corner of my eye I see the person next to me leave his machine so naturally I think my friend, who was behind me, is going to use the empty machine. After I get my passport I look over to the machine next to me and on the screen under \"name\" it says Tariq followed by a very unpronounceable last name. Me being oblivious and thinking my friend Shane was the one using the machine, I start pointing and laughing yelling out \"Dude, look at your name! The machine fucked up your name!\" After about 20 seconds of laughing and pointing I realize that no one is responding. I then slowly turn my head and see a middle eastern grown man staring through my soul. I immediately grab my ticket and run back to my group of friends without saying a word due to pure embarrassment. My friends, who had witnessed the entire thing going on, were literally on the floor of the airport laughing. One of my friends even went over to the man to explain to him the situation. \nFast forward an hour later: I'm sitting in my seat on the plane and lone behold, Tariq walks down the aisle. We make eye contact and he comfortably takes his seat across the aisle from me.", "summary": "I made fun of middle eastern man's name at the airport thinking it was my friend, He ended up having the seat across the aisle from me."}
{"id": "t3_1czjf5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO(32/m) and I(26/f) are having differences in parenting. Please help.", "post": "Veggies are ruining my life. I've been with my SO for about 5 years. I have a 7 year old child from a past relationship, and we have a 4 year old together. Our 7 year old (he is just as much my SO's as he is mine) is VERY picky when it comes to veggies. What it boils down to is that my SO and I have very different opinions on how to handle uneaten veggies. We have had at least 10 VERY serious conversations/arguments about veggies....such a petty subject, yet I feel like it is putting a BIG strain on our relationship because neither one of us is willing to settle on the issue as this same problem keeps on resurfacing. How do I deal with these parenting differences?", "summary": "SO and I have different parenting styles, and disagreements over petty things are starting to put a strain on our relationship. HELP."}
{"id": "t3_3appyb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[17 M] dont know how to get over my anxiety and start talking with [17 F]", "post": "So I have known this girl for about since September last year. I would really like to start talking to her and maybe one day ask her out but my anxiety gives me big problems and I dont know what to do about it.\n\nI know a decent ammount of things about her as I've managed to speak with her but it was a group type of thing which made it easier. I dont know what I should do. \n\nThanks to previous experiences with people I have a bad case of anxiety and dont really trust many people with what they say to me and I always think that they are thinking the worst thing possible about me. How do I get the courage to talk to her more and what should I say?", "summary": "Have bad anxiety know girl for a while talked to her before but only in a big group. How do I get over my anxiety so i can talk to her more and what should I say to her?"}
{"id": "t3_1i9l40", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M]27 just learned my boyfriend[M] 23 of 6 months has been trying to get back with his ex while I've been away on a work project for 10 weeks.", "post": "I work for a Political Consulting Firm, we run campaigns all over the country for various clients.  My job keeps me away from home for a few weeks here and there.\n\nI moved to Florida 1 1/2 years ago.  I met a boy in january of this year and we have been boyfriends for the last 6 months.  He had recently moved to florida as well and we hit it off.  We took things slow, did it right.  In may I was assigned to a 10 week project in SLC.  He supported me and my work, the night I left for this project he told me out of the blue that he loved me.\n\nThe first few weeks were fine. We talked once a day and texted here and there.  After week six or so it began to get a little shaky.  We hashed things out and seemed to get back on an even keel, its now week 9 out of 10, Im wrapping up a very successful campaign and ready to head home and see my boy.  Or so I thought.  Tonight on facebook he made a post about heartbreak mew mew it hurts mew mew.  I was like oh no what did I do!!!, I start reading the comments like oh shit this doesn't make sense.. low and behold he was drunk facebooking about how his ex (who lives in NJ 1000 miles away) broke his heart again, and how much he still loved his ex, how this ex broke his heart again by sleeping with another man.  Me, his boyfriend of the last 6 months no where in the picture.\n\nI understand distance, outta sight outta mind, and I have a tough job for relationships.  But HE told me he loved me, not the other way around, I was head over heels for this kid.  Now I'm broken and angry.  What's the adult thing to do here? Confront him for closure or just delete friend, cut contact and start healing?", "summary": "just learned my boyfriend of 6/7 months is still in love with his ex and has been talking with him while I have been away on work stuff for a few weeks"}
{"id": "t3_2wqx26", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24/M] with newly single her [26/F]... what do I do now?", "post": "I have been secretly seeing a girl who was engaged. Her situation was basically that she was very unhappy with her fianc\u00e9e but stayed with him due to them having a child together. \n\nNow I don't normally get involved with people in relationships and I felt like an asshole for doing it but I really adore this women so I stuck it out to see if anything would happen. \n\nRecently we have been talking about a future together. Little things like who would do the dishes and who would do the drying. What side of the bed she would have and also bigger things like the fact that I would love to have her son in my life. She also tells me that her son mimics me and he knows how to say my name better then hers. (I have met him before and talked to him over the phone a few times)\n\nWe have been sleeping together for a few months now and other then a few stupid fights we get along really well. Recently she said I love you and I also said it back and it was cute. She also wants to be a big part in my plan to get my own place so I can live by myself. \n\nLess then 24 hours ago her and her fianc\u00e9e had a talk and they decided to break up, they have a holiday planned together in a few weeks which they still plan to take. \n\nNow comes the hardest part. I know I have to be patient, I know I have to be supportive but I am also unsure what I do and say. How do I act and how long do I wait/ how do I know when she will be ready to commit again?", "summary": "A female who was in an unhappy relationship who I was also seeing is now single. How do I act and how long do I wait/ how do I know when she will be ready to commit again?"}
{"id": "t3_25mymd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [22 M] of over a year wants an open relationship with me [22 F] because he needs multiple sexual partners. What do I do?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have a wonderful sex life. I am extremely content and happy with remaining loyal to just him. He has mentioned to me while we have been together that he has a \"girlfriend sharing\" fetish. A lot of his sexual fantasies involve me and another man. He constantly wants to hear if I have any sexual desires for another person. It doesn't bother me, but I honestly have no immediate desire to seek out another sexual partner at the moment. \n\nRecently, I found several emails on his account responding to casual encounters ads on Craigslist and also some concerning Facebook messages. \n\nWhen I confronted him about it, he told him that he is addicted to the \"hunt\" and the \"rush\" of seeking out a woman to have sex with. He admitted to me that he needs multiple sexual partners. He suggested a healthy way to fulfill this drive is for us to have an open relationship. \n\nI have attempted to bring myself to doing a couples swap or swinging type thing, but I just couldn't bring myself to it. For whatever reason, I am just not completely comfortable with the notion of an open relationship. I will admit I experience an immense amount of sexual jealousy and pain...My boyfriend on the other hand, does not. Sex and love are two separate things to him. It's hard for me to come to this viewpoint.\n\nI really want us both to be satisfied with each other. I'm not sure what to do exactly? There is a part of me that wants to be open to the idea of an open relationship, but then there is the other part of me that experiences great pleasure from being loyal and loving to one person...\n\nShould I try to eliminate my sexual jealousy and attempt an open relationship in the future? Or would it be healthier for me to remain monogamous?", "summary": "My boyfriend really wants an open relationship and thinks it is healthy for our relationship. I am on the fence if I should try it or not."}
{"id": "t3_xdh2s", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How to ask a girl out via Facebook?", "post": "Hello, I (M, 23) want to ask out a girl (don't know her age, must be 20something). The only contact I have is via FB. \n\nI know it's not the best way, but I have to stick to it. Now my question is, is it better, to just text her and ask right away or should I start a conversation first and ask then?\n\nA little more background: I know her from university, had a course together. Hadn't a lot of time to talk there, because she was always late and left quickly afterwards. After the last session of the course she added me on FB, I think she didn't know my full name until then. \nI think she must have searched me, because we only have two friends in common (one is a fellow student from the course, the other one happens two be my ex... I don't know how close they are, but I assume they are only college mates).\nDuring the course we exchanged some smiles.\nAfter she added me, she wrote me in the chat and we had a brief small talk, mostly about uni stuff until she left. She isn't online often, so I wrote her a message some days ago, again small talk. She responded quickly, despites being offline, but didn't respond then, when I wrote again.\nSo, should I text her again, when she's online and try to start a conversation or ask her out of the blue, if she wants to meet?\nFB is the only way of contact, because the course is over, it's summer break and it's a big uni, where you don't run into people often.\n\nThanks in advance for your tips!", "summary": "Want to date a girl, only contact is via FB. Don't know, what's the best way, to ask her out."}
{"id": "t3_2n2cjo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My best friend [18 F] has been neglecting me [18 F] for her boyfriend", "post": "My best friend and I have been friends for around 5 years now? She and her boyfriend has been together for a few years alr too. She is the kind of person who always put relationship over friendship, and because she's my best friend, I understand her and never said anything. \n\nI understand when she stop replying me for days when she stays over at her boyfriend's house. I understand when she ask me to leave early because she wanted to spend time with her boyfriend. I understand when she said I'm not allowed to be in contact with her boyfriend.(One time she got angry and ignored me for a month because I called her boyfriend to come over when they had a fight) \n\nI'm really okay with her being like this. Her boyfriend is an important part of her life and I can accept that. But recently, I can't even get a reply from her. Her text replies are always short and cold. We go to different schools so I don't get to talk/see her everyday. I'm always the one looking for a topic to talk about with her. She only comes looking for me if she and her boyfriend has a fight and she needed somebody to talk to or when her boyfriend is too busy to talk or go out with her. \n\nI had confronted her about it, but she said that it's not like that, she didn't mean to make me feel this way. But after that it's always back to the same situation and I always end up feeling used and neglected.\n\nAny advice?", "summary": "Need advice because best friend makes me feel used and neglect because she's too in love with her boyfriend to care about other things."}
{"id": "t3_2qp2r7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it odd that I [26M] usually always hit up my girlfriend [24F] to hang out while she almost never hits me up?", "post": "I'm 26 and have been dating my girlfriend (24) for about 1 1/2 years and for the past few months she has only hit me up once wanting to hang out.\n\nI'm usually always the one asking her to hang out. Most of the time she always wants to hang out when I ask her too and I know she makes time for me since she does work a lot. It's not a question of her dodging me, it just that she rarely asks me first.\n\nIf it could make a difference, I'm also her first serious boyfriend. She had a few before me that lasted only a couple months and I'm also the only person she has had sex with so I'm wondering if she thinks she might be annoying me by asking me to hang out.\n\nIn regards to her seeing someone else, I really don't think that's likely as she really isn't the type of girl to do that (every guys famous last words right?). We still get along great and other than a few minor issues throughout all of our time together, we really haven't had any problems. She has even been getting me more involved with her family lately as well.", "summary": "Is it odd for the guy to (almost) always ask her to hang out or should she be trying to initiate it more?"}
{"id": "t3_32zlpg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/M] wondering if I should move on [17F]", "post": "Me and this girl have been seeing each other for this past month. Every visit we usually cuddle and stuff but If I make moves other than kiss she is hesitant and moves her face away. During the time we have seen each other she drops boyfriend hints but I played the asshole and just blow them off jokingly. She usually texts me everyday and I thought things were going well\n\nThe 6th time we cuddle and made out a little more. But I was still frustrated with it all. So on the way home I gave her the ultimatum I said I want to know if you want a relationship because I don't want to just be a cuddle buddy/friend. So I said 4 days decide so I am not wasting my time. She hugged me and kissed me goodbye. \n\nThen the texts die off in frequency and after the 4 days I asked her did you think about things. Here is what she said paraphrased, since I deleted it out of anger\n\nI know you know I like you but I don't know if I want a relationship right now because I don't want someone who will leave on me because you have goals in life and shit. And I want to better my life too.\n\nI just told her I understand and she told me she cares about me and likes me. and tells me the only guys that talk to her that like her is me and another the others she blocks. I just replied that I don't like getting played and she said I know then that's been it.\n\nNow no texts or anything from her, I haven't wanted to text first because I feel like that is a just a nice way of saying that I don't want you anymore. I feel like I should move on. I believe I saw her today at work and she didn't even look which my overthinking mind went in anger.", "summary": "Should I ignore and move on with a chick that told me she doesn't want a relationship to avoid being a cuddle buddy?"}
{"id": "t3_52chlx", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/M] and [24/F] having some serious issues. Please help.", "post": "My girlfriend of a little over a year and I have been getting into such tiny arguements lately, but they turn into such war between us. Today, we had a great day, went to the sports bar to watch the games, held hands downtown, and then I made a comment of how her breasts needed to be put away and she gets extremely offended, saying it isn't my place to comment on her body. There is a lot of stress surrounding us both but she keeps making a big deal out of little things and it makes her want to break up with me. I really love her with all of my heart but I think I'm losing her with all these petty arguements. I'm tired of feeling like shit for making her cry, I'm tired of making her curse at me but I really don't know what I can and can't say to her at this point. She always wants me to be myself with her and never change, but she acts like I am making her life a living hell.", "summary": "GF and I keep having petty arguements and I can't stop them from happening. Feel like I'm losing her. Arguements continue to get worse. Always feel as if the next one could be our last."}
{"id": "t3_1lnhpv", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[29/f] Has anyone divorced/separated and continued to live with your ex [m33]? (xpost-divorce)", "post": "I am telling my husband tonight that I want a divorce. We have two children together (8 & 6). He knows this is coming, so I don't think this will be ugly, just upsetting.\n\nUnfortunately, we can not afford two separate apartments, so we will continue to live together for a while. He's already moved into a separate bedroom. I plan to continue to share all the finances/bills until we work out two separate budgets. I know he won't have a problem with this.\n\nHopefully, it will continue to be amicable, and he will agree with what I want in regards to our living arrangement/relationship/family. Here are the things I want to discuss with him in regards to all that:\n\nLive together, but in separate rooms\n\nPay bills together, as we always have done, until we get a separate budget put together.\n\nKeep things as normal as possible for the boys for as long as possible (obviously, we will discuss our separation with them, but I mean to keep them in the same school/neighborhood/etc)\n\nNo sex (or seeing each other naked). Also, I doubt this will happen any time soon, but if one of us starts to date, no bringing anyone home.\n\nMake childcare decision together\n\nNo blaming each other. What's done is done, and we need to move forward for the sake of our children.\n\nWhen all our debt is payed off (should be by February), we will sell our house and look for separate homes/apartments and legally divorce.\n\nI know this isn't the best option out there, but we simply can't afford two separate places right now. Has anyone been in this situation before? Any tips or advice for making this work?", "summary": "Husband and I separating, but will have to live together for 6 months. Need some \"rules\" for us to live by. And advice. And maybe internet hugs."}
{"id": "t3_41xzox", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[M/19] Is it bad to never have been in a relationship at 19?", "post": "A little about myself: I am currently at 250 lbs. Yes I am fat, but I am currently exercising and dropping pounds like the stock market. I am currently going to college and it is only my second semester, with about 2 or more years to go.\n\nMy situation is recently I have felt depressed because I am alone, but my problem is I have never gone and looked for anything nor was i interested in looking. The feeling is just now hitting me that I don't want to do this anymore by myself, I don't have too many friends anymore as most went off to drown themselves in student loans at some big name college. I have only had one good friend along the way, and these last few years have been VERY HARD but he helped me through. Now... its not enough for me, I need a GF and was just wondering when I get where I want to be with myself, is it awkward that I have never been with anyone?", "summary": "is it awkward to be my age and not have been in a romantic relationship? I will be happy with myself before I get into one."}
{"id": "t3_hb3w4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The man I'm falling in love with is engaged. Should I tell him how I'm feeling?", "post": "I'm 23 (f). He's 22 and recently got engaged to his gf  (23) of 2 years in November. \n\nWe've known each other for a little over 4 years (since freshmen in college) and have always had chemistry, but until last year I was in a committed relationship. \n\nI found out through the course of time that he used to have feelings for me before he met his fiance. Up until 5 or 6 months ago we've flirted as friends, but it's never escalated to anything I would note. \n\nYet since that point, we've become incredibly close- We did undergrad research, gamed together, went on road trips, etc.\n\nI've never felt this way about anyone, even my ex of 5 years. I feel like we're on equal levels/wavelengths and he makes me so incredibly happy. However, I always thought it would be too selfish of me to tell him how I feel.\n\nEither way I'm almost certain, even if he did share my feelings, he'd never leave his fiance. Yet, lately I've felt this urge to tell him I'm falling for him. He's going to be moving about 4 hours away for graduate school (moving in with fiance) in two weeks and I'm afraid I won't see him again. \n\nThe most confusing thing is that these past few weeks he's been going along with my flirting: offering me his sweatshirt when I'm cold, holding my hand on silly occasions, giving me back rubs, and showing some reservations about his fiance in regards to differences in lifestyles. \n\nI'm seriously conflicted over my next course of action. I'm very tempted to tell him the night before he leaves, but is it worth his possible (and my inevitable) heartache?", "summary": "Best friend, the guy I'm falling in love with, is engaged and moving away in the next two weeks- Should I tell him how I feel?"}
{"id": "t3_3o9011", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by thinking I was the turtle whisperer", "post": "This happened when I was around 12.  I found a turtle in my back yard, put it in a box, and brought it inside. From experience and from TV I had developed an understanding  that I couldn't *force* an animal to be friends with me. I felt a sense of pride in my maturity for realizing it might take time for this turtle to like me. I covered my floor in newspaper, took him out of the box. Then I went and sat on the floor across the room. I had the fanciful idea that if I was patient enough, the turtle would warm up to me even though I removed it from its natural habitat, family, friends, etc. \n\nI sat there and waited. Sure enough, the turtle began slowly crawling over to me. I was ecstatic but I sat there playing it cool for almost 45 minutes. The turtle made his way across my room inch-by-inch as I daydreamed that he actually wanted to sit in my lap, play with me, etc. \"All it took was a little patience,\" I smugly thought as the turtle finally arrived. As soon as he was close enough to reach me, he stuck out\nhis neck and bit me really hard. Dejected, I put him in the box and took him back outside. So his (defensive) attack, while painfully slow, was effective.", "summary": "I took a wild turtle indoors and patiently waited for 45 minutes while it crawled across the room to me, thinking it wanted to be friends. all it wanted that whole time was to bite me."}
{"id": "t3_2e0svk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my GF [23 F] of 9 months, have been having some problems of late and I said something stupid and hurtful today.", "post": "So today we were in class working on an assignment and she was continuously exclaiming that she didn't understand what was going on. She seemed to be ignoring me when I asked if she needed help. She turned to our classmate and asked her. The other classmate didn't know and pointed to me for clarification, so I stated why she (GF) didn't ask a teacher. She said she didn't want to. So I mistakenly said that she should stop bitching about it. \n\nNow she is enraged with me and won't speak to me at all.\n\nI believe that my statement stemmed from both exhaustion and overall confusion and annoyance that I've had with her the past 6 months. \n\nWe just got back from summer break and I hadn't seen her for about 3 months. Upon reuniting she seemed pretty uncaring and not very excited about the whole situation. \n\nThe first two months of the situation were great, but now she doesn't seem to care or ignores me at times. We see each other in class but that's about it besides the occasional day where we get together. I've been down emotionally and almost borderline depressed about how the relationship doesn't seem to be going anywhere even though I deeply care for her. For the most part it is just me consoling her since she has had some family issues the past few months. She says that she loves me but I don't know if she really means it anymore.", "summary": "I've been having issues getting closer to GF past few months and said something stupid and hurtful. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4px1em", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25F] need advice on dating my coworker [25M]", "post": "Reddit! A bit of background information, I just reached my 6th week at my new job and since 2 weeks ago I have been 'kind of' dating my colleague. The reason I say 'kind of' is because we've been on 2 dates and I don't really know what I want to do. We get along super well, and I don't feel like I need to try very hard to keep a conversation flowing. He is very charming, funny, full of compliments and for some bizarre reason he likes me (has told me numerous times). I on the other hand, have been told that I'm talkative and very easy to get along with... But I don't know how to respond to compliments. Also, I am from a very conservative Chinese family and he comes from an unconventional Indian family.\n\nHere is my dilemma: Every date we've had has been very awesome, except when it comes to the end of the night... And we both don't know if we want to kiss or just hug it out. It's funny.. We are both super talkative and confident but when it comes to the kiss/ hug game we both shy out and end up hugging. Ok back to the dilemma, I'm still uncertain if I like him in that way or if we would be better as besties. I've always only dated Chinese/ Malaysian guys, and have never had Indian guys on my radar.. But I do find him attractive. I know for a fact my family would be completely against it - but it's not my main issue right now as I'm known to do opposite of what my parents say. Also, we work together (different teams), a lot of my friends are against me dating a colleague but I genuinely don't think there could be any implications... Then again I've never dated a colleague. I'm in this really confused stage where I don't know if I like him in that way or not. I know a relationship is suppose to be between 2 people and no one else matters, but I'm not sure if I can date someone who is from an Indian background - just because I know they would cop a lot of shit from my friends and family.\n\nI don't know what I'm doing...", "summary": "I am kind of seeing a coworker, he's an absolute gentleman but due to his ethnicity, pressure from friends and family I don't know what I want to do."}
{"id": "t3_l16jz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What am I supposed to do about this? It's driving me INSANE.", "post": "Here's the deal. I'm 16 (m) she's 17 (f, obviously).\nWe've been real close friends for about a year. We have our ups and downs. \n\nMy parents are kind of weird when it comes to me and girls, and they found out that we made out/fooled around a little, and kind of didn't like that...then they found out she offered to take my virginity. They love her to death, and we're crazy about each other, but this whole sneaking around thing sucks. They just don't trust her. Oh, and they're pretty conservative Christians. So am I, but I'm a little more...lenient when it comes to females...\n\nSo, what should I do? I feel horrible lying to my parents about this, and I DO NOT want them to find out that we've been sneaking around for some late night...stuff pretty regularly. Should I just tell them, and try to convince them to approve, or what?", "summary": "In high school. Like this girl. Parents like her, but don't trust her. Me and girl sneak around. Parents can't find out. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2sdoqc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So me [22 M] just got told from my girlfriend [21 F] this....", "post": "Basically i'm hanging out with her this weekend and she is already looking up stuff for us to do... I have kind of been lacking on that end because had work + tons of errands to do today. I basically told her that I felt bad  for not looking for things to do this weekend, because she hopped on it before i could.\n\nShe THEN replies to me with this: \"i just wanna make an effort in this relationship, so you see it <3\"\n\nWhat is she thinking? Does she think i don't see her love and affection??? Should I feel bad about this??? What should I be telling her back right now???? I want to make her feel like I care about her...", "summary": "Girlfriend thinks i don't see that she cares about me after a recent talk she kind of had with my mom a few nights ago when i visited."}
{"id": "t3_1c2tje", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (28m) just moved in with my gf (27f) of 14 months and have second thoughts daily. Is this a sign of issues to come or just my commitment adversion?", "post": "For almost all my post-high school life, I've been single or at the most simply dated. There were a myriad if reasons for this, but for the most part, it never bothered me. \n\nI started dating my current gf 14 months ago, although we worked together and had been acquaintances for approx 3 years before we started dating. She knew who I was and seems to accept my habits like the fact that I smoke pot each night, dedicate alot of time to my new profession as a brewer, watch sports all the time, etc. \n\nNow that we're living together, I can't help but think I may have made a mistake. We get along great and aren't constantly fighting. But part of me still can't shake this feeling of, \"what the hell have I gotten myself into?\".\n\nFor example, my gf is very picky about certain things around the house and for the most part I'm not, but when I do assert myself she gets pretty bent out of shape very easily. She'll get over it quickly when I explain why it's not a big deal, but the fact that she gets all pissy for 10-15 minutes about me wanting to add more pasta sauce to MY raviolis concerns me as it seems like the kind of thing that doesn't warrant a second thought. \n\nThis kind of stuff doesn't happen all the time, but I'm noticing that she sweats the small stuff too much in general, gets stressed out easily it seems and kinda shuts down (quiet, not very responsive, seems sad). Is this something to be worried about or am I just making excuses since I'm not use to such commitment?", "summary": "Been single most my adult life, just moved in with gf and can't help but wonder if I made the right decision due to gf not letting small stuff slide off her back."}
{"id": "t3_2ggb1u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She [17/f] wanted us to stay friends, i [17/m] promised, she left", "post": "Me and my ex just became strangers. \n\nWe had been in relationship for 7 months, then we broke up. Its a long ass story i dont have time nor the will to feel again. I love her, i truly do, i know though that i am not in love with her, i hope it makes some sense.\n\nWhen we broke up she said some hurtful things, really hurtful, she also hurt me quite a lot while we were together, i know i hurt her too. But i realized it and i promised myself to try to make things better.\n\nAbout a month ago, she apologized for what she said and asked if we could be friends at least, she asked if we could try not to be strangers. I accepted her apology and i wanted to try to make her happy in any way i could, even if we were just friends.\n\nThings were great between us, but last Thursday, she began to ignore me, i texted her to see how she is doing, i asked around if i had done anything, i apologized to her if i had done anything to hurt her. Nobody tells me what happened or why.\n\nMost people told me to ignore her, to forget her. I cant though, i care about her, i promised her that i'd do my best for us not to become strangers. It's really painful. Its much more painful than when we broke up.", "summary": "Broke up with gf months ago, we decided to stay friends, things were great, all of a sudden she forgot i exist."}
{"id": "t3_2wfupt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[19F] Worried about future relationships due to past issues.", "post": "So, growing up I had a lot of issues with my childhood. My parents are drug addicts. My mother is a prostitute. My dad is a pimp. I was involved an underground child pornography/prostitution (though no penetration happened) ring. I grew up very severely abused emotionally, mentally, sexually, and physically. \n\nI was really lucky and got out of the ring at around 10 and cut my parents out of my life at 12 (mother) and 15 (father). I went through a couple periods of psychotic depression and anxiety but I've been \"clean\" for the last 2 years. I went through intensive therapy and still go to therapy occasionally. I'm very normal now. I'm a mostly happy person, I have a great support group of friends, I go to university, have a job, and many hobbies. \n\nIn short, I've become a really well adjusted and healthy person and worked really hard to get where I am. \n\nBut after dating for a while I've noticed when these things come to light people don't want to see me any longer. I don't really bring them up but they usually come up by the 4-6 month mark. I make a point of not going into detail. mostly saying that I had a bad childhood; maybe a mention of drug use and not speaking to my parents anymore. Twice now, I've been dumped for the sole reason that my past makes them feel uncomfortable. \n\nI'm still dating now and very happy with my relationships but I'm worried about the next time I get serious with someone and how they'll react but I don't think it's fair to keep things from them if they ask. \n\nSo, my questions are: \n\n* How do I handle these questions?\n* Does my past make me extremely undesirable even though I'm a healthy person now?", "summary": "Had a lot of childhood trauma but am healthy now. Worried about how that reflects on me now. How do I go about bringing this up with people I'm serious with and does my past make me very undesirable?"}
{"id": "t3_1jipj6", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by making a toaster explode", "post": "OK I know yall hate this but its a great story that happened to me 8ish years ago.  Enter a very hungry Korinthia into the kitchen. Ohshit.jpg leftover toasted raviolis! (for anyone not from the midwest, more specifically St Louis, these are breaded and fried meat ravioli, fucking delicious) So I'm like no way I'm ruining these by tossing them in the microwave, no sir these are going to be reheated properly in the toaster oven. Now this wasn't any toaster oven, this was a great cook-your-food-perfect-every-time toaster oven, this was a my parents wedding gift toaster oven. So I pop those suckers in and commence heating my delicious taste sensation. 13 year old me is like hey do you know what would be a great idea? Fuckin around on the computer for 6 minutes thats what! *45 minutes later* *sniff sniff* What the fuck is bur..OH SHIT. As i sprint towards my kitchen its clear my whole house is full of smoke. I approach the toaster oven to discover that my precious ravioli have turned into several flaming charcoal briquettes. So i grab the door to open it and immediatly burn my hand. I grab a towel and open the door. SHIT SHIT wtf am i gonna do. So genius 13 yo me throws a glass of water at the flaming ravioli. For those of you that arent aware hot glass+cold water=explosion. The glass door on the toaster exploded sending glass everywhere. The glass lands on my kitchens hardwood floors leaving numerous large scorch marks (that are still there to this day). Needless to say my parents werent pleased. My whole family still bitches about the shitty toasters weve had ever since and my mother still teases me about ruining her floors.", "summary": "Threw water on flaming food in toaster glass door explodes leaves scorch marks on hardwood floors and ruins toaster. whoops"}
{"id": "t3_hjad8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, today I had the shittiest day of my existence. What happened today that made you smile?", "post": "The girl of my dreams just ripped out my heart and crushed it into microscopic dust. (Through Tumblr...) I also almost got killed today due to my motorcycle malfunctioning and spilling gas all over the road. (And that will cost an arm and a leg to repair, I found out) Then I came home to seeing half my book collection ripped to shreds by my dog. (My fault actually, I left them in boxes on the floor while I painted my room.) I take joy at seeing other people happy or smiling. So raise my spirits up and tell me what made you smile today.", "summary": "Had a depressing and shitty day. O take joy in the happiness of others. Tell me something that happened to you that made you smile."}
{"id": "t3_47hqn2", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Finding out your passion/major", "post": "I'm a senior in high school now and I'm nearing the end of my final year.  Picking out colleges, what major to go into all that fun stuff.  For my major I'll be going into Computer Engineering due to the fact that I've spent all of my life so far on the computer, so why not make it my job?\n\nI've listened to numerous college students who were incredibly passionate during their presentation and it made me wonder if me going into Computer Engineering is a good idea after all and if I'd enjoy it. It's pretty much all I've got going for me so, I'm guessing I should stick with it?", "summary": "I know work isn't supposed to be fun, but was there a moment in your life you just knew what major you wanted to go into?"}
{"id": "t3_4dx1sf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [29 M] found a great place to live, with a small catch. The house is owned by a 80 year old woman who lives downstairs and sublets two big bedrooms upstairs.", "post": "Hello folks,\n\nI relocated to Boston and have been searching for a place to live in Greater Boston for the last few weeks. Last night, I found a place through a friend. It is an old colonial house in a very upscale neighborhood.\n\nThe house is owned by an 80 year old woman whose husband just passed away. She is spending most of the pension going to Rabbinical school and is renting out two bedrooms on the second floor of the house. Not overtly religious, former English teacher and a very very nice person with good neighbors.\n\nShe is offering me one of the bedrooms upstairs (they are both pretty big) and full access to every amenity in the house for a competitive rate.\n\nMy question mostly comes down to:\n\n1. Should I, as a single 29 year old male live in a house that is owned by an 80 year old woman? \n\n2. Living with someone and having a nice friendly conversation are two completely different things. This lady hasn't lived with roommates in her life and I am not sure if she would be up to it. Also, I don't want to end up being bossed around by the \"owner\" regarding rules, guests, etc. She says that she has no problems with any of those things, but I am not sure she understands that there might be some adjustment required on her end too.\n\n3. Finally, if something were to happen to her (she's pretty old), what would be my responsibility as a tenant? Would I be expected to take care of her to some extent? That is a dealbreaker, I can't do that for various reasons.\n\nAny advice is appreciated. If someone has lived with an older adult with a huge age gap, personal experiences would be invaluable here!", "summary": "29 M found a place to life with 80 F for competitive rate, but not sure if it is a good idea."}
{"id": "t3_34l5pw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by making it look like I was laughing at a girls mom in the er", "post": "This happened today and I still feel pretty bad about it..oh boy. \n     I was in class, done with my work, and bored. It's important to the story to tell you that I have an extremely glitchy iPhone 4. Well..I opened Facebook. I saw that this girl I hardly know posted a picture of her mom in the emergency room and that she wasn't doing good. I tried opening the picture to see the comments, because why not. \nThat's when my phone froze, it does this often. \n     I started randomly clicking the screen because I was frustrated. At this point I was hardly paying attention, but I started accidentally typing a comment. You know how you can add stickers to comments on Facebook? Yeah, I did that. \n     It was a sticker of this fish/man saying \"HAHA\". And then I accidentally posted it. \nAnd then the bell rang for lunch, so I didn't realize it for about a half an hour. Plenty of time for people to see what I posted.\nAnd then the comments started flooding in.\n\"What's wrong with you?\" \"What's your problem\"", "summary": "girls mom was in er, she posted it to Facebook, made it look like I was laughing about it, people got pissed"}
{"id": "t3_2qyqd7", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My [19F] friend [19M] wants to hang out with me tonight, but I already have plans...", "post": "I've made plans with a group of friends yesterday for New Year's Eve. Today, my close friend, let's call him Josh, wants to hang out. Josh and I have only started being close for about half a year - but during that time we've gotten really close. If I tell him that I'm hanging out with my friends, he'll probably want to join in, because I sometimes include him with my other friends, but this hangout was supposed to be a bit more intimate. Josh has hung out with them before - only once - so he's not as involved in this group. I don't want to purposely exclude him, but I'm not quite sure how to handle this situation. Am I being unreasonable?", "summary": "Friend wants to hang out with my friend group, which I was supposed to be having a more intimate get together with. Don't want to exclude him, but don't know how to let him down."}
{"id": "t3_3mrzj9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 F] with my boyfriend [25 M] [1yr], do I tell him my ex will be at a mutual friends wedding?", "post": "Hi relationships,\n\nThis is sort of silly but something I have been going back and forth on for a few weeks now. I have been dating my amazing boyfriend for just over a year and in a month or so we are traveling to my home country for my best uni friends wedding. He has visited once before to meet a different group of college friends and had a great time and everyone loved him. I am so very excited for my best friends wedding in a few weeks except for one overshadowing issue. \n\nMy ex-boyfriend who I dated for 1.5yrs in university will also be in the wedding party, we ended on really rocky terms. He hurt me badly and I didn't react well, it's not something I'm proud of. I ended up losing several friends in the process which is something I still feel a lot of guilt and shame about but have chalked it up as a learning experience and think I am more mature for the experience. My ex and I are more or less cordial but I have yet to tell my boyfriend that this guy will be at the wedding. I usually am the first to advocate for open communication and honesty, but this feels like a potentially double edged sword. I don't want to hurt my boyfriend by telling him therefore making him think there is still something there and this guys presence is something he should be worried about, but on the flip side I also don't want him to think I am intentionally hiding something from him.\n\nMy boyfriend already knows that I am anxious about the wedding and seeing people who I have not seen in 4+ years. Do you think it is okay to leave it at that high level, knowing that he has no interest to hear about past relationships, or should I give him a heads up about my ex? I have discussed with my therapist who thinks high level would be fine but I am leaning toward telling him just in case someone says something at the event.  I truly do not want to cause smoke where there is no fire if that makes sense, since I have no feelings toward my ex and absolutely do not want to hurt or worry my boyfriend unnecessarily.", "summary": "my boyfriend and I will see my ex at a big event with a lot of my old college friends, should I tell my bf my ex will be there or let sleeping dogs lie?"}
{"id": "t3_23m8am", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21 M] and My ex [20 F] broke up after [6 months] a few weeks ago. She kissed my roomate last week.", "post": "I dated a girl for a little over 6 months. She broke up with me because I wasn't able to open up and be normal. I have always found it hard to express my feelings to people (friends, family, etc). We have to see eachother a lot becasue she is still friends with my friends and me I suppose.\n\nA week ago I had a suspicion that her and my roomate did something. I wasn't sure what though. I asked them about the night in question but didn't explicately ask them if they did anything. Neither of them said anything. Yesterday my friend told me that he heard something about it. I aske my roomate and he told me no he didn't. I then asked my ex she said they kissed when they were drunk at a party. My roomate finally came up to me and wants to talk tonignt.\n\nThis entire time I have been feeling like asking any of these questions to her would ruin her day, which it sounds like it did. My roomate want's to talk to me tonight over a beer to fully explain how it happened. And the fucked up thing is this entire time I still love my ex and still want to be with her. Sorry this has become a wall of text I guess.", "summary": "Ex and roomate kissed, I'm pissed and want to know If i still should try with her and any other advice about the subject would be helpful."}
{"id": "t3_45t59o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend (19/F) is afraid to do go against her parents wishes. Thoughts?", "post": "My girlfriend and I (22/M) have been dating for about 2 months. I just graduated and she is still in school, staying on campus. I am going on a overnight trip to the beach next weekend and really wanted her to come with me. \n\nShe asked her parents and they said no. This then became a much bigger issue of independence and I really encouraged her (or pressured) to tell her parents instead of ask, as she is an adult and I would like an adult relationship. \n\nThe conversation finished by me saying that I viewed her independence as a threat to our relationship, and that because I really care about her and don't want to get hurt, I would like to get this straightened out. \n\nAm I being unreasonable and any other ideas on how I should approach it?", "summary": "Girlfriend (19/F) has parents that won't allow her to stay over anywhere with me. I am concerned about how independence plays a role in our future relationship. Am I being unreasonable and any other approaches I could take?"}
{"id": "t3_30ke96", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "This situation is tearing me up?", "post": "(M/17 about F/17)\n\nThis girl I really like has a boyfriend. They've been dating for a couple years. I ain't gonna try nothing unless they break up, but its unlikely. Anyway I feel like she's teasing the HELL OUT OF ME! Every time I see her in the halls or wherever, there's almost ALWAYS physical contact. (She always bumps into me and stuff.) And if they do break up and I do pursue, I feel like I'd be a downgrade compared to her \"Ex\". Anyway to get over this or anything? \n\nSorry. Seemed more of a rant. I just don't know what to do. Its taking a toll.", "summary": "I really like this girl who teases the hell out of me but I know I can't ever get her. Need advice."}
{"id": "t3_3tnarx", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[Discussion] Should I get a dog if I live on my own?", "post": "Hi all, not sure if I selected the right tag or not but I wanted to get your opinions and advice on a predicament I have.\n\nNext year my wife and child are going to move out as we are going to get divorced. As horrible as this will be, I need to focus on the future and for myself to be happy.\n\nOne thing I have always wanted to do and couldn't when my wife was here was to get a dog. I grew up with dogs and love them.  I have really wanted a dog for years but my wife didn't want them. \n\nAnyway, as I would be divorced, it would mean I would be living on my own (in an apartment). I am concerned that it wouldn't really be fair on the dog to work a full time job and only spend time with it in the evenings and have it stay at home all day on its on.\n\nWhat are your thoughts and opinions on this sort of case? Particularly dog owners who live on their own - what do you do? \n\nAnother important matter is that I live in this country on my own, so I couldn't have family come over and see it etc (they are all back in England, whilst I'm in the USA).\n\nAnyway, sorry for the long post, but I wanted to see what you all thought on this? What advice you may have or if you can think of any tips? As much as I would love to get a dog, I want to get it in the right circumstances so I can be sure it is happy", "summary": "Want to get a dog but live on my own. Is it fair on the dog or what tips could single dog owners give?"}
{"id": "t3_3r42d8", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Rx seized without permission by security", "post": "So my girlfriend and I went to a deftones show at the ventura majestic theater last night in Ventura, CA. When entering we consented to a search, we had nothing to hide. The girl going through my girlfriends purse spotted two containers with pills. One was an unmarked container with advil, the other was a rx for Bactrim. She immediately gave the rx bottle to her \"medic\" who locked it up. She started protesting and another guy said he was the medic and that he locked it up because the label was \"scuffed and said something about a phenyl\". He told is we could get it back after the show. Fast forward to close to the end of the show, and we come back. The second guy told us to call on Tuesday to get our drugs back. When we asked why he said because he had been trying to help us all night and my girlfriend had been a \"pain in the ass\" We called the cops and right before they showed up he gave us the pills back and kicked us out for no reason. When my girlfriend inspected her pills he said her molly was no longer in there (neither of us have ever even seen molly) We asked for his license number, to store rx meds it's our understanding you need a D.E.A. license? He refused. Anyway, we got the pills back and we got a incident number. Do we have any rights, is there a police report we can file or ???? Thanks y'all!", "summary": "Rx seized without permission, do we have legal rights, is it worth talking to a lawyer? Can we file grievances with someone?"}
{"id": "t3_267fbz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] ex-girlfreind [28F] of 1 year (NC that entire year, dated for 2 years) randomly texted me the other day.", "post": "We've been broken up and absolutely no contact for a year when suddenly she texts me out of the blue that:\n\n\" This guy at the fair I am at looks so much like you that it is crazy. The only difference is that he has a goatee. I am really glad you decided against growing it while we were together. This is why I told you it wouldn't look good on you.\"\n\nThen she attached a photo of the guy. He looks vaguely like me and the photo shows her posing with him at the fair.\n \nI texted her back immediately with \" LOL. I am good at with not having  grown it. You had a valid point.\" I attached a picture of me and then I asked her how she was with a simple \" How are you doing? I hope you are well. It has been forever. \"\n\nAnd she never responded. We both have iphones and I got a read receipt but she never responded back. \n\nWe had a pretty emotional break up after she miscarried. I blamed her getting pregnant on purpose in the heat of the moment but later apologized. She attributed the miscarriage to the stress I caused her by throwing accusations at her but she later apologized for blaming me.  \n\nIt was a pretty mutual split and we both asked for quiet time to get over it.\n\nI'd like to know how she is but I don't want to push her to responding and it is so weird to hear from her after a year. \n\nHow do I proceed?   Can I ask her to catch up?", "summary": "Ex-girlfriend contacted me after a year of no contract randomly. I need help not looking like a fool for wanting to catch up and know how she is."}
{"id": "t3_22nk7b", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Hi, I'm new here", "post": "So, I found my way over to this sub because I had a discussion with my mom and felt like kind of a hypocrite.  \n\nMy mom is a life-long smoker who despite having cardiovascular issues refuses to give up cigarettes and tonight we had an argument about it.  Her stubbornness is going to lead to an early death or leave her incapacitated in some way, shape, or form.\n\nAnd after I got off the phone with her I felt like a hypocritical prick because even though I am giving her the correct advice and she is absolutely being a dumbass w/r/t her continued smoking....I kinda do the same thing with my weight.  Oh man do I eat like shit.  Can't do that anymore, I'm almost 33.  I'm going to have a heart attack.\n\nSo, I figure if I'm going to lecture my mom about needing to take better care of herself, I am going to set an example and take better care of myself, too.\n\nI'm currently 5'6 and 175 pounds.  My goal weight is 135 lbs.  Holy crap I can't believe I am going to try to drop 40 lbs. at my age.  Is it possible?  We'll see.  Gonna try, at least.\n\nThe plan is to start C25k and Stronglifts for exercise (which, of course I don't get ANY of) and clean up the diet.  My BP is at the very low end of pre-hypertension and my cholesterol is borderline high and my triglycerides are high.  As such, I'm going to try to stick to a DASH-style diet as best I can over the next 3 months (hence the 90 days SN thing) and then get a new blood panel done.\n\nThank you for reading my brief novella. I did not intend for this to be so long, but sometimes when you write after taking NyQuil the words just flow.", "summary": "Fatass hypocrite wants to drop 40 lbs. so that he's no longer a fatass, just a hypocrite."}
{"id": "t3_1s61t0", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/M] In person my girlfriend [18/F] is amazing. When texting I feel like there is no relationship.", "post": "Hi /r/relationship, so I live around 50 miles away from my girlfriend (we go to different universities), I drive up twice or more a week. We have known each other for around 40 days and we've not been in a relationship for long. \n\nIn my past relationships communication has been fantastic, we have messaged for hours without ever getting bored. But my current gf can't keep up a conversation by text. So because we don't see each other that often I think it is important that we talk a lot. It makes me feel like she isn't that interested, yet she tells me she loves me and in person, it is the best relationship I have ever had. I'll quote the last texts we sent:\n\nMe:\n>Hi sweetie, how's it going? Still lying around watching Breaking Bad?\n>I just realised that now that we have deleted our profiles then we need a new place for sending our stuff \n>Can't believe how much I just want Friday and Saturday to fly by for Sunday :3\n>How's the weather with you? It's terrible here, so I'm worried about you :c\n>xxxxxxxxxxxxxx\n\nHer reply:\n>We'll use email instead! ;) hehe\n>The weather is okay :) Still windy and rainy\n>xxxxxxxxxx\n\nI really like her, an I don't want to lose her.. I just don't know what to do, I feel like she doesn't even like me, yet she says that she does. Or is it normal to not talk much on days where you don't see each other? Am I being a bit clingy?\n\nThanks for any help you give me guys.", "summary": "Girlfriend doesn't seem interested by text, am I too clingy trying to message to often or is she just disinterested..."}
{"id": "t3_238ljo", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Cat Diagnosed with FLUTD...diet questions", "post": "So Tuesday I noticed that my 5yr old neutered cat kept trying to urinate but couldn't so I immediately took him to the vet. His bladder was full and plugged. He was put under and cathed and has been at the vet on antibiotics and fluids for the past 36 hours. In short, he was diagnosed with FLUTD and had crystals.   I get to pick him up tomorrow and was told that he will be put of Royal Canin S/O. I am planning on buying the food but after looking up the ingredients I'm not sure if I want him to be eating that long term. He previously was eating Wellness (grainfree) and although the vet suspects that the food could of caused the issue I was wondering if anyone had any experience with a cat with crystals on a healthier food than the vet's prescription. I am going to get a second opinion about his diet from another vet; I'm currently researching what type of questions to ask.", "summary": "Cat has crystals, vet wants to put him on Royal Canin S/O. I looked at ingredient list and not impressed. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_31dwr3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Immediately after sex, my [23M] girlfriend [24F] of 3 months compared my come to her ex's, and doesn't understand why that upset me.", "post": "This is a little awkward for me to share because I don't like to kiss and tell, but it's been bothering me and I can't get it out of my head. I want to know if this is as messed up as I think it is, or if I'm overreacting. \n\nMy girlfriend uses birth control, so we have sex without condoms, but as an extra precaution when I come, I pull out and come on her. The last time we had sex, right after I came, she commented about how much nicer it was that it all sort of pooled into one place (I pull her close to me and it has nowhere to go), unlike her ex, who I guess splattered all over her. \n\nI fully understand that I'm not the only guy she's had sex with. I may even have been open to talking about it in some other context. But to me, when I literally just pulled out and came on you, the last thing I want to hear is anything about your ex, and especially nothing comparing sex with me to sex with him. It threw me off my game for a minute and I got cold/distant. She complained that my reaction hurt her feelings and I could tell she wanted me to apologize or something. It was very late and I was tired, so I did. \n\nThe more I think about it, though, the more it bothers me. I feel like I was right. She's going to think whatever she's going to think, but to vocalize about sex and ex in the same sentence when I was just inside you seems like the height of rudeness. \n\nAm I wrong to feel this way? I'm curious how many of you would find it offensive, or if you think I'm being an idiot.", "summary": "I came on my girlfriend and she compared it to her ex's come. I got upset and she doesn't get why. Am I really the jerk here?"}
{"id": "t3_2mk5y9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 F] with my boyfriend [27] of two years, I saw a text, asked him about it, text is now gone.", "post": "Maybe five or six weeks ago, I was sitting with my boyfriend as he was on his phone. I can't remember why, but at one point he went to his texts and gave it a big scroll back (I didn't see how far). As it came to a stop, a text from \"Diane\" saying \"Fo sho\" caught my eye. I don't know that name, but I didn't really think anything of it, as my boyfriend works freelance and talks to a lot of people, most of whose names I don't know.\n\nOver the next few weeks, I found myself occasionally wondering who Diane was. I didn't want to make my boyfriend feel accused, and I trust him, but after a while I figured what's the harm in asking. I'll ask, he'll tell me she's one of his students' moms or something, and all will be fine.\n\nSo last night after dinner, we were hanging out and I said as casually and not accusing a way as possible, \"hey, I know this is silly and I'm sorry for worrying about something so meaningless, but can you tell me who Diane is? I saw a text from someone by that name while you were on your phone a few weeks ago.\"\n\nHe had no idea what I was talking about. Doesn't know any Diane. He pulled out his phone, went to his texts, and searched for \"Diane\" and the words \"fo sho.\" Zero results. He scrolled back to almost a year, no Diane. He said he was sorry he didn't have an answer but that he hasn't deleted any of his texts. He took me in his arms and promised me he has never lied to me.\n\nSo I guess either he's lying, or I didn't see that text, right? I'm sort of desperate for a third possibility. We've had a wonderful relationship, I have no reason to suspect him of anything. At the same time, I really value my sanity. The idea that I so firmly grasped onto something that wasn't even there is almost more alarming that the thought of him lying to me. How should I handle this??", "summary": "Saw a text from a girl on bf's phone, asked him about it a month later, it's no longer in his phone and he says he didn't delete anything. Need advise."}
{"id": "t3_2ogftw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not attending the lessons", "post": "I'm a freshman (civil engineering). I started off by going to the lessons, but soon enough I convinced myself I could study all this stuff by myself  and I didn't need all these lessons. I do want to pass my exams ofcourse, and since they are coming up in exactly a month from now, I started checking the contents of my courses, also I have heard the last lessons each semester are the most important ones for several reasons.\n\nSo this one day - yesterday - I attended a whole day of school. The theory lesson of chemistry was over, I nearly understood it completely (feelsgoodman), next lesson is in 15 minutes. At this point, a cute girl randomly takes place next to me, I have nothing to do and nothing to lose, so I go for it.\n\nStart the chat with a casual \"hi\", seems she is hesitant about talking at first (shy or so idk), her name is Ellen, tell her mine, small talk about school and think about asking her out. Conversation goes way better than expected, she has humour and she's pretty smart too, we come at the point of talking about chemistry (next lesson is an exercise session). Tell her I skip lessons \"now and then\", but I like chemistry and I ask her if she likes it too and maybe we can go out one night to continue what we were talking about.\n\nAt the point where I asked if she liked chemistry, she started looking weird at me. Chat was done, she stood up and said: \"Lesson is going to start. Raise your hand if you need help, Martin. It was Martin, right?\"... \n\n>Mfw she is a PhD student in Chemical Technology and Material Science\u00ad\n\n>Leave the auditorium, will check the exercises at home", "summary": "I asked a PhD if she's interested in her research domain, she corrects exams and knows my first name and what I look like"}
{"id": "t3_l8xdr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Does learning change your brain?", "post": "I don't want to get into a major philosopical/scientific debate. What I want to know is your personal opinion and experience.\n\nOne of my lecturer says that our brain changes the more we study. If we keep on studying, we will be able to learn new things faster and be able to absorb more information. For example if someone is bad at biology and they put the time and effort in. Eventually they will master it and learn new topics quicker then they did at the start.\n\nI'm hoping that is true. I just started college and I am finding it difficult. I can change my study techniques and I am willing to put in effort and the time. However what worries me is that I am in my first year. If I am struggling at this level what will happen in my 2nd,3rd or 4th year? I fear the years of not doing anything but be lazy and watch tv might have taken its toll on my brain. My brain after a while stops absorbing new information and I get a headache. \n\nEither way I'm going to spend the next 8 months treating my class like a full time job.", "summary": "Is the brain like a muscle? Does \"exercising\" by studying change it so that it develops the ability to learn faster and take in more information?"}
{"id": "t3_1k6yys", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (M/19) think that my SO (F/19) is having an emotional affair with me. Am I overreacting and being unreasonable, or should I be worried?", "post": "We're both in college and during the school year, we hang out all the time. However, we live in different cities and during the summer, the amount of time we spend together gets cut down significantly. \n\nShe has guy friends which I don't mind, but she recently met someone from her co-ed sports team and after knowing him for less than two months, I'm a bit worried of how their friendship has progressed. For example, they talk and text to each other every day, talk about their sex lives and other explicit information, their emotions, and other things as well. They make plans to always meet up and work out together, but after they work out, they usually go and get something to eat and they've even seen a movie together at one point. \n\nI've already addressed this to my SO once before that it was making me uncomfortable, but despite that, she continued to talk to this guy and hung out with him one-on-one still. At one point when I was with her, I caught a glimpse of one of her texts saying to him how she was \"disappointed\" that she couldn't work out with him and see him that day when I was supposed to be hanging out with her that day. The second time I talked to her about this, she admitted to liking him a little bit, but would stop talking to him if I wanted her to. Not wanting to be overbearing and possessive, I'm not going to force her to stop talking to him, but it still irks me a lot. But she did seem to realize that what she did was wrong and she would try to fix it. \n\nAnd I mean, the guy is moving halfway across the country to go back to school next week, so they're not going to be hanging out anymore. That's not the point though, the fact that she still showed interest in him by the way she talks to him and how they always hung out makes me want to end the relationship, but I'm not sure if that's the emotional side of me saying it.", "summary": "My SO has been talking to a guy a lot, am I being unreasonable in being annoyed at that? Should I break it off?"}
{"id": "t3_3wx3bm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (25m) gf (22f) has made plans to go winter bathing with her friend (22m), and I'm really uncomfortable about it", "post": "I have been together with my gf for about two years now, and living together for one. \n\nThis last week she has been making these plans to go winter bathing and drinking with a male friend of hers. \n\nEven though she tells me that I am supposed to be there too, I can't help but feel that I actually wasn't supposed to join, as the plans had been made completely without input on day and time from me. Because of this, the set date (next Monday) is at a very bad time for me, and I am most likely not able to join. \n\nOn the same note, in thing that make me feel like I wasn't supposed to join, is the fact that I didn't even know about the idea before the day was already set, and I had to find out about it myself when it was written into her calender. \n\nThis whole situation is making me really uncomfortable because I don't find what's gonna happen appropriate without me and I don't know what to do. \n\nJust to clarify. I don't have any problems with her hanging out with her friends. It's the getting drunk and undressed that's bothering me.", "summary": "gf is making plans to winter bathe with male friend. I don't like it and don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_378apx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my friend/romantic interest [18F]. Should I ask or should I wait?", "post": "A couple weeks ago, I finally mustered up the courage to talk to a girl in one of my classes and we basically immediately hit it off. We were so alike that it was too good to be true. We haven't stopped talking / texting and usually after class I walk her back to her dorm. Last Thursday I spent like 7 hours in her dorm just talking with her and going on Tumblr and stuff and that was that. Yesterday, I invited her to hang out with my friends and we went ice skating and the whole shabam. She knows I like her because I guess I'm very obvious with my feelings?? (\u25d5\u203f\u25d5\u273f) She told me she had fun even though it was kind of stressful (she's very timid and shy and my friends are very loud/outspoken). She's very comfortable around me so I was just talking to her the entire time. There are approximately three weeks of school left and she goes back home after finals week (she's not from here). And there is a small chance I'll be able to see her during the summer. Question is, should I ask her what she thinks we are, or should I just continue talking to her as friends throughout the summer and ask when school resumes? Thanks for any help.", "summary": "met girl, really like her, spent some time with her, she goes back home in 3 weeks, not sure what to do"}
{"id": "t3_1uuxpg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My dad might be engaged, don't know how to approach it", "post": "First off, my dad is a really strange guy.  He's like that weird moldy stuff in the back of your fridge that you have no idea what it is.  \n\nHe started dating a woman maybe 5 years ago.  I don't really know, since he didn't tell any of us.  He actually never formally told us, we kind of found out through seeing open emails and texts.  But anyway.  My family (minus me) & dads girlfriend went away on vacation for a week to visit my dads grandparents, and apparently it didn't go so well.  My sibling overhead the two talking, and thought it sounded like they were arguing about why they shouldn't tell his parents about something and she shouldn't wear something.  Vague, yeah.  But he's been secretive about what he has gotten her for Christmas and has said somethings that seem to hint he's proposed to her.\n\nI want to approach this situation in a calm manner, but I'm not sure how.  I know I'll be quite annoyed and offended if he doesn't tell us soon (one of his weird things is to keep important information from people, like not telling his parents that my sibling is having a baby), and so I don't want it to get to the point where he eventually tells us and I'll have trouble forgiving him for not even talking to us about it until he's planning the wedding or some shit.", "summary": "Dad could possibly be engaged, my siblings are pretty sure he is, how do I approach this situation in a calm manner before it could get past the point of forgiving him from keeping it from us?"}
{"id": "t3_in3vx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Boss passed away after my first day of work...do I still get paid?", "post": "Background: I am a paralegal, just moved to a new city/state, and was searching for firm(s) I could work for from home, potentially on a contract basis. An attorney ~2 hours north of here found *me* and after phone and in-person interviews, I got the job. \n\nHis first e-mail to me mentioned that my work as his contract paralegal would begin on July 5, and that I could expect to work around 25-30 hours a week. Although I was going to be working from home, on the 5th, I again made the 2-hour trip to his office to meet with him for the first time as an employee. For several hours, I navigated their software program, had my firm e-mail address set up, and met with him to review pending cases. He also gave me a significant amount of cases/documents to begin reviewing, as well as a \"To Do\" list. I left around 5:30 and drove home with all this new information. Midday on the 6th, I got a call that he had passed away in the middle of the night. \n\nI don't mean to be callous, but from a professional standpoint, **what do I do in this situation?** Can I submit a bill for the time I spent traveling and working there? Do I just chalk it up to a bizarre experience and move on? Do I hang tight and see if they'll still have work for me once they get a grasp on things?\n\nHe was the only attorney at the firm, so it's not like I can just be re-assigned. I've been in (brief) contact with the rest of the staff, but they are all devastated and I don't get the sense that *anyone* knows what the fate of the firm will be.", "summary": "The attorney who hired me as a paralegal died the evening after I started working for his firm. Without being a total dick, should I submit a bill for the time I worked that day? "}
{"id": "t3_1af1vs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He [30m] and I [35F] keep inching closer to ending it after 5 years, but are hesitating.", "post": "Things have been strained for a long time.  We never quite found our relationship footing again after my dad was in an accident and I was a wreck, but the problems we have are long standing ones.  He has a lot of anxiety and depression issues that are at the core of a lot of our problems, and we're both extremely stubborn.\n\nI don't feel like I can ask him for things, whether it's money for groceries or shared household goods or for an ear to hear about my day.  We get frustrated with each others' foibles and it's eclipsed the good we used to see in each other.  Overall, we had a really solid relationship, but over time a million little things seem to have undermined it.  I'm happy being content, but he wants the spark we used to have at the beginning, which I think is unreasonable to expect to continue after years.  I want to grow and change and develop a life together, but I don't trust him to make changes.\n\nAll that being said, I love him very much, and it hurts me to see him hurting, but I don't know that we can keep going the way we are.  We are both hesitant to end things, but I feel like it's the right thing to do.  I want to save it, but I also want to end it, and I'm so lost and torn.  Maybe if we took a break and reconvened?  I don't know what to do.  \n\nHow do you know when it's really over?", "summary": "Fights are becoming exhausting but we both still care about each other and don't really want to end it.  How do you know when enough is enough?"}
{"id": "t3_2qly3b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21F) don't want my insecurities and anxieties to come between my boyfriend (20M) of 4 months and I.", "post": "Different account from my main because my boyfriend is a reddit lurker.\n\nI have many insecurities about myself, and I'm afraid that this may come between my boyfriend and I. Being overly self-conscious is something that I have struggled with for years. He knows about this, and tries to reassure me, but at times I let my insecurities get the better of me and I lash out. \n\nHe tells me that he likes me the way that I am, but I'm very self conscious about my appearance. He's naturally very thin, and I weigh about 35 more pounds than he does, so this makes me feel pretty self-conscious around him. I have talked to him about my insecurities before, and he said that if he has seen any downsides, or anything that I should feel insecure about, that he has decided that these things don't matter. So is this a good thing, or might this mean that he is trying to look past a \"downside\" to dating me that may become a breaking point for him later on? I have a habit of worrying about little things, so I can have a difficult time differentiating between something that may actually be worrisome, or just me worrying too much. \n\nHow can I come to terms with my insecurities and be more accepting of myself so that I may keep it from becoming a problem? I don't want my self-consciousness to come between us.", "summary": "I get anxious and insecure about myself, and I don't want it to become a big issue between my boyfriend and I."}
{"id": "t3_3r18sq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] with my girlfriend [27 F] has depression and has isolated herself and I'm not sure what to do to help her.", "post": "We've only recently been together, about 2 months now, but this past week her depression has been creeping up on her.  It's a sensitive subject and I tried to bring it up but she doesn't want to talk about it.\n\nFrom what little we do talk about it, she's said that all the therapy and meds she's tried doesn't seem to help her.\n\nI really care about her, but I'm completely in the dark.  I can't possibly fathom what she's going through.  All I know is I want to help the best I can but am not sure how to approach such a delicate topic.\n\nI've tried inviting her out to do things with me but she says no.  I don't want to seem pushy nor forceful, so I try not to be negative about it and tell her it's, ok.  \n\nI've never met anyone with depression before, or that i've noticed I guess.  I'm at a lost about what I can do for her since she's isolated herself from the world.\n\nI love her and she's not doing well.  It hurts me that anything I try doesn't seem to have any effect.  I'm hoping in the long run, she'll let me in and I can help carry the burden for her.", "summary": "my gf has depression.  This time she's isolated herself from the world.  What can I do to help her?"}
{"id": "t3_zjaee", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend suffers from anxiety; after a crazy series of events, she's a bit cold with me", "post": "So me and my girlfriend (both 22) have been together for around 3 months, we have gotten along so well that we never fight. The reason that me and her started talking is her cousin that USED to be her bestfriend since they were babies, and I say used to because from out of nowhere she started to make my gf's life a living hell, she became bestfriends with my ex-gf and started talking bad about her for no reason. My gf has anxiety but handled it pretty well, but then her ex-bf called her and told her that he and her cousin had sex twice and that he had to come clean to her. After that, her anxiety went through the roof, and even her attitude towards me has changed. I guess my question is, what should I do?", "summary": "gf has anxiety, and her cousin/bestfriend fucked her ex-bf to stab her in the back, now I'm left wondering \"wtf\""}
{"id": "t3_32yzxl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my friend's sister [18 F] feeling awkward", "post": "My friend and I have been friends since high school (I'm in my third year of college now). I always found his sister attractive but it didn't develop into a full blown crush until last year. She had just graduated high school, and I'm blown away. Not only is she attractive, but she's also extremely smart. So I asked my friend to help me out with her. He said he didn't care, but it seems like out of all our friends, he'd be most comfortable with me dating her. However, all he did was just tell his family and her what I say on a daily basis. Most of it is me busting his chops, like \"I'm going to be your brother-in-law\" or \"Your sister is the most beautiful person in the world\".\nEventually, she found out, and it seemed like she's cool with it. She always says hi and smile whenever we see each other, but lately it's been awkward. Whenever I visit her house, her aunt (who lives there) would whistle whenever I'm around. (Not to be arrogant, but I am pretty fit... and seeing as how I live in California, I'm mostly wearing tank tops and short shorts lol) The mom and sisters would also do that \"wooing\" sound like the kids would do in elementary school. I admit it's nice to know that everyone finds me attractive and they like the idea of me dating her, but she gets embarrassed whenever I'm around and sometimes she ends up going to her room. I have no opportunity to actually talk to her. To make matters worse, she's only there on the weekends because she goes to a college that's an hour away.\nOverall, her entire family is clearly supportive. Her mother and step-father both love me. Her aunt might even have a crush on me tbh (she's in her late twenties). And most importantly, her brother is either pretending to not care, or he is ok with the idea of it. I just have no clue how to ask her out, or even sneak in a conversation with her. To make matters worse (or better?), she's never had a boyfriend. What should I do in this situation? Is this even a good situation?", "summary": "I have a crush on my friend's sister but her family makes it awkward. I'm 20 and she's 18."}
{"id": "t3_4z139z", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Minnesota] My sister's workman's comp was denied due in part to her employer's late-claim filing.", "post": "My sister lives and works in MN. She worked/works at a well-known hair salon as a cosmetologist. She's been working in the industry for a number of years with the bulk of her time spent at her current place of employment.\n\nIn April, she began experiencing pain and numbness in her right hand and wrist (severe carpal tunnel). Concerned, she called her primary care provider. Her PCP told her she will need to are an occupational health doctor because it appeared to be a work-related injury. She went to the new doctor and informed her employer. Additionally, she took all the right steps in filing a workman's comp claim as she was told her injury is a direct result of her occupation. \n\nHere's where it gets messy... My sister filed her claims right away and asked her boss/manager to submit the claims on their end. Her boss did not submit any claims to the insurance provider nor did she comply with state law. Her boss told her she had submitted the paper work many times but my sister called the companies to check and her boss had done no such thing.\n\nAfter many calls, emails, and legal advice... her boss finally submitted the claim. This was MONTHS after my sister initially submitted all her paperwork. Meanwhile, she has been waiting and not working. She has no income currently as she is unable to use to her dominant hand. She's continued her prescribed therapy and has been working closely with her doctor and now has obtained a lawyer.\n\nThe claim her employer finally filed was denied. The denial claims her injuries were not from work. Her lawyer has told her this denial most likely happened because her boss was so late on the claim. She has a deposition scheduled, but until then, she can't work. She's been told her appeal will most likely be denied and the insurance will claim it's a \"woman's issue\".\n\nShe will not get her back-pay. She will not have her medical bills covered. She cannot work until this is resolved.\n\nI am here asking if others have encountered this? Is there some else she can do? What are her options? Is she able to seek damages due to employer's negligence?", "summary": "sister's workman's comp denied due to employers negligence.  Claim was submitted months later. Insurance is now claiming injury is not from working. What are her options if appeal is denied?"}
{"id": "t3_1xjdzt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What constitutes \"moving too fast\"?", "post": "I (19/m) have been crazy about this girl (19) on my college campus for 6 months now, but she was in a relationship, so I waited patiently for my chance (having a feeling that this long distance relationship with her high school sweetheart wouldn't work out).\n\nNow after about a month of her being single and the both of us ready to start something, I'm worried about getting too serious too fast, because I've had similar problems in the past, and we are both very interested in each other. No sex has been had, but we've spent a lot of time getting to know each other, shared the occasional kiss, and talked about being together as a couple.\n\nWhat is the \"standard\" or an appropriate time to make things official and is a month enough time to get over her ex (of 6 months)?", "summary": "Is a month of seeing each other enough time to not be considered a rebound? And is it time to make things official?"}
{"id": "t3_125g87", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Found out my girlfriend was raped. She blames herself. What should I do?", "post": "(x-post from askreddit)\n\nOk so here is the story from what I've gathered, this happened about a year before I started dating her.\nShe attended a party near the end of her junior year in High School. She never really did alcohol or any drugs before this to much of any extent but this time she went way farther than she intended and ended up getting very crossfaded. Basically at some point during the night she started getting hit on by her boyfriend at the time's best friend who was sober. She was still a virgin and hadn't even slept with her boyfriend before but this guy convinced her to have sex with him.\nIn the morning she woke up in his shirt and barely remembered anything from the night before, but the fact that she had slept with the guy was fairly apparent. She asked him what had happened and if they even used protection but he wouldn't admit to anything. He wouldn't even say that they had sex. Soon after rumors circulated as they do in high school. She was always known as being incredibly innocent, hell she is a pastor's daughter, but now guys started asking her out of the blue if she would have sex with them if she was drunk. Also rumors got out that she was pregnant (she wasn't).\nAll this had a devastating impact on her self esteem and ego, meanwhile her boyfriend had gotten seriously depressed and was absolutely intolerable to deal with. The guy from the party started talking to her again. They met a few times under different circumstances, he would get her drunk, and have sex with her.\nShe left her boyfriend and soon after stopped seeing the other guy too. By the time that I met her she was obviously very scared to be in a relationship again. She also wouldn't sleep with me for the first few months because she was so scarred by her last experience. She still blames herself for the entire event even though the guy was obviously manipulating her.", "summary": "My girlfriend had her virginity taken while crossfaded by her ex-boyfriend's best friend. Now i'm dealing with baggage."}
{"id": "t3_23hefh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22F] should have broken up with him [25M] when I had the chance, Now i'm stuck. help?", "post": "My partner and I have been dating for three years and we have a baby together. Before my daughter was born we talked over our work arrangement and came to an agreement (I worked, while he stayed home and took care of our daughter, unless we got financially tight then we would both work). When the moment arrived I returned to work and he stayed home watching my daughter. At first things were perfect but then everything went to hell. He was barely taking care of our daughter and playing video games the entire time. We fought but I continued to put up with it  even though we were very tight on money and I was extremely stressed. \n\nI had a trip planned to visit back home (Across the country) with our daughter planned and paid for months in advance. I finally was so stressed that I threatened to not come back unless he got his act together. We spoke while I was away and he convinced me to return, so I did.\nWhen I got back everything was entirely different. He had found a job and worked around my schedule so during the day we took shifts in taking care of our daughter while the other one worked. He started being very attentive and we even managed to sneak in a couple of dates.\n\nThe problem is that I don't feel like I love him anymore. It takes so much effort just to be intimate and do things like cuddle, hug or even kiss. I feel like i'm secretly dying on the inside. He's a fantastic dad and would make any girl lucky. I don't have friends or family in the state we are currently living in and I don't have any money left over after bills so if I were to break up with him I would have to continue living with him until at least the end of the year.  Should I go to therapy and try to rekindle our relationship or save-up and move out?", "summary": "Bf and me had rough patch. Don't love him anymore but I can't just leave due to situation. I need advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2x6iqy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "My buddy had a Tifu day today because he tried to secretly get a blessing from his girlfriends parents", "post": "So my buddy has been dating his girl for almost 3 years, and I guess he's finally decided he wants to propose. We work at a mill and this week we are working night shifts. My friend Morgan was at home sick on monday, and we assumed he was sick on Tuesday as well.  As we are on night shifts, the time line was this:\n\n-Monday night, morgan stays home sick\n\n-Tuesday morning, gf goes to work\n\n-Tuesday night, morgan left for their home town, about 4 hours away,  to ask for permission to marry her\n\n-later Tuesday night, gf gets home thinking morgan has left for night shift and all is well\n\n-Wednesday morning, morgan gets home at 9am. Normally, we get off night shift at 4am and he'd be home by 4:30am\n\n-unfortunately, gf has stayed home sick so she notices he isn't home on time\n\nSo when the gf realizes he isn't home on time she messages me and another guy we work with asking if we've heard anything,  which we hadn't at the time.  She assumes he's cheating and parks her car around the corner so that when he eventually comes home, he will think she's at work and will incriminate himself. \n\nMorgan gets home and she flips the fuck out and now she demands a written letter from Morgan's supervisor stating he was in fact at work.", "summary": "my friend went to his gf's hometown to get her parents blessing, she thinks he is cheating and is livid with him"}
{"id": "t3_3zsnhc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm not in a relationship but I'd like to hear people's opinions on a question that has been on my mind.", "post": "Hi! I'm 19 years old and I am not in a relationship, but lately I've had this question on my mind that I'd like to hear your opinion about! Is it uncommon for 2 people to date, when they've known each other closely for a couple of years and when she's had a serious relationship but the guy (me lol) hasn't ever had one?\nI got to know this girl (19) when she was in the middle of her relationship and we've always been close (although I would definitely not call it a friendzone, as there has always been flirting going on).", "summary": "Known a girl close for a couple of years, she had a serious relationship, I've never had one, is it possible to date her (I can't seem to find a better word than 'possible')."}
{"id": "t3_h3sic", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Watched Monday Night's Colbert Report, and it hit me with a thought about Islam...", "post": "Background: Like Colbert said, \"Instead of fear, we ignored Muslims, like God intended\". But WHY!?! Christianity and Islam has butt heads plenty, it's a HUGE religion, and is not only is it vast, but it incorporates numerous ethnic groups all over the place that seem completely distinct. I remember going on wikipedia and finding a bunch of ethnic groups in Europe being Muslim. And then I remember going on to another link through reddit (surprise, surprise) and found this photo journal of a man going through the world, and he photographed a people that lived on boats off of the Philippines (I think) that refused to live on land, and they happened to be Muslims also. Turks, Bosnians, Arabs, Somali's, Filipinos, to random converts. All Muslims. Please Reddit, if you're going to downvote, give me some damn reasons that matter in this situation.", "summary": "Why don't we acknowledge that Islam affected the world so much in the West, even though a lot of things I read up to connects to Muslims somehow, some way."}
{"id": "t3_lrrue", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "As an Usher at a cinema. I would like to know when it became socially acceptable for you, the 'customer' to make such a mess?", "post": "I work as an Usher in Cineworld a cinema chain located in England. I happen to work in the 4th busiest cinema in the company. My jobs include selling tickets, food and drink, cleaning toilets, and cleaning screens. I am also a trained projectionist. \nI enjoy my job for the most part.\n\nI am confused though. When did it become okay to make a mess? I don't mean the odd dropped popcorn here and there, or the spilt drink. These are definitely expected. I mean the the type of litter you'd expect in a bin, bottles deliberately thrown on the floor, bags torn to shreds, chocolate smeared onto the floor. These are clearly deliberate, I don't care about the extra effort this causes, I care about the abuse I receive for 'taking too long' from the customers. If you didn't make the mess in the first place. There would be no problem.\n\nWhy is this acceptable?", "summary": "If you drop your litter in a cinema. Don't abuse me for taking time cleaning for you. Don't want to wait. Don't litter."}
{"id": "t3_313vso", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Need help getting over someone.", "post": "So here's the deal, I met a woman at a bar while we were there to see a mutual friends band. We kept seeing each other at shows and she got real flirty with me ( she was drinking most of the time) she'd say how cute and adorable i am and hold me hand, ask me to dance, kiss, tell me she loves me etc. etc. etc. \nwe started talking more and more and it got to the point where i needed to know what the deal was between us. She said it was just a friend thing and she can come off aS flirty and she's sorry for leading me on. \nso im not gonna lie, i was hurt, stayed a bit distant, didnt text her at much. last weekend she came out to 2 more show's, I knew she'd be at one but wasnt sure about both. Friday she showed up and she sat with me, we talked and she even asked why she hadnt heard from me in a bit, i said school and work have kept me busy. she left early, gave me a kiss. but then saturday was a mess. She would do all the stuff like before, grabbing and holding my hand etc. etc. etc\nSaturday night i had  a bit of a meltdown driving home, still thinking there might be something even though i know she's not interested. Her flirting makes me feel awesome and so euphoric, but then i come crashing down knowing it will never lead to anything.", "summary": "I like her, she doesn't feel the same way as i do, but is a flirt and is messing with my head. "}
{"id": "t3_4lt2jy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By Playing Laser Tag", "post": "This happened a while ago now, I was out with friends at a shopping mall. \n\nI wanted to buy Steam credit, and I'm not really sure why, honestly. After all, I do have a debit card. I think it was for GTA V or someting like that. It was $70 (AUD), or at least that's how much I wanted. I was informed that they would have to give me a 20$ and a 50$ credit, and I said okay. Then, my friends decided to play laser tag (A game I tend to take quite seriously, too seriously) \n\nIt's really hot in there, and all you do is run around, plus I'm not physically fit, at all. But I'll be damned if I don't give laser tag my all. So, after our 2 sessions, I go home, and take out a faded, code-less 50$ steam credit it had become a casualty of laser tag, and a 20$ one which was audible. I called them and there was nothing they could do about it. I had no proof. So I was out 50$ because of laser tag and my incredible competitiveness of the sport.", "summary": "Bought a 50$ and a 20$ Steam credit, Played laser tag, gave it my all, went home to a soggy and unusable 50$ credit. "}
{"id": "t3_y46g8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Long-distance issues. Plus, she likes me too much? [26M/21F]", "post": "I (26M) have been dating this girl (21F) for somewhere over a month now. I recently told her that we should be exclusive, but I am starting to regret that. There are a couple issues: first, the physical distance between us and, second, her disproportionate feelings toward me. \n\nHer parents live about 20 minutes away from me so the distance wasn't a big deal for our first couple of dates. However, she is an undergraduate in a college that is 2.5 hours away from the city that I live/grad school that I attend. I've gone up and spent the weekend at her place, and she recently came down and split time with her family and me. \n\nThat's when we had a conversation, and we agreed to be exclusive. We agreed to take turns seeing each other every 2 weeks or so. We text and skype quite often to compensate for the lack of personal interaction. \n\nIt's obvious to me that she has intense feelings toward me, but I just don't feel such mad \"love.\" Example: I barely use facebook except for the chat function, but she just litters my wall with stuff. At the end of our recent meetup where she came to see me, she actually cried when it was time to say goodbye for 2 weeks. \n\nDon't get me wrong. We get along great. We have a similar sense of humor and similar nerdy interests and similar political views. Our sexual compatibility is ridiculous. I just don't feel this young adoration that she seems to feel for me. \n\nI really don't know what to do; I'm a total relationship noob. I'm worried that the distance is too inconvenient. I'm worried that I'm going to break her little heart. I indirectly tossed out the idea of an open relationship to her, but she did not go for it at all. We get along great, but part of me thinks I should break it off. I've tentatively agreed to visit her in a couple of weeks. Help?", "summary": "Recently agreed to be exclusive with girl who lives 2.5 hours away and likes me more than I like her. I have no experience with relationships and have no idea how to handle this."}
{"id": "t3_4dfooh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to handle my boyfriend's unaccepting and downright unwelcoming mother for the rest of my life?", "post": "My boyfriend and I are both 19. My boyfriend's mother is the only draw back to my relationship with him and I'm not sure how to handle her. She claims to be fond of me, but I know she's lying. She never even gave me a chance, even after a year of being together.\n\nMy boyfriend got me a promise ring because we know we want to be together forever. While pretty much everyone else was happy for us, his mom lost her shit and said nasty things about our relationship. She then got her current husband involved. His dad wasn't exactly nice about it either, but regardless, respected the decision. I understand them being concerned since we are young and they married young only to end up unhappy and divorced. However, this woman is one of the biggest hypocrites I have ever met and is essentially a 40-something child. I can't stand her and am not prepared to deal with her for the rest of my life. I have never followed the \"respect your elders\" thing simply because of you give me no respect and are rude to me, I won't respect you, regardless of age. Any advice on how to handle this monster of a woman? I can give examples if need be, it's just a lot to type out a year's worth of hypocrisy.", "summary": "What to do about a hypocritical future mother in law who refuses to give me (19 f) and my boyfriend (19) a chance without ALWAYS comparing us to her?"}
{"id": "t3_25i72x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20m) broke up with my gf (20) yesterday and I need help.", "post": "So I originally posted my problem before and had some good feedback on what to do. Ultimately I did what I was suggested. I broke up with my girlfriend yesterday and it really has taken a lot out of me. We weren't connecting like we used to and I was getting annoyed with her all the time. It was going down hill fast and I had to make the call. I'm super depressed and lonely and I keep wanting to see her and get back with her but I know it's not going to work. What do I do? How do I deal with getting over her and move on? HELP!", "summary": "I broke up with my gf yesterday and can't get her out of my mind. I'm regretting breaking up. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4phvzz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my ex-gf [24 F] - broke up about 6 months ago, feeling guilty about how it played out", "post": "Hey folks,\n\nMy ex (we dated for just shy of 3 years) and I broke up about 6 months ago, and I was immature about it. Neither of us were happy in the relationship, but I told her I didn't want to be friendly going forward and basically never wanted to see or hear from her again. This is complicated by the fact that we live in the same neighborhood, went to college together and share some common acquaintances.\n\nEven though breaking up was very hard on me, I also stupidly followed through on a macho impulse to act as though it didn't particularly bother me at the time and, when she asked me how I was so calm, told her that it just felt better now that we had made a decision.\n\nSo, I think this adds up to me having been a jackass. And I really regret it because I have no end of respect for this woman. I've thought on and off about reaching out to apologize because it seems like the right thing to do, but I don't want to weird her out now 6 months out from breaking up.\n\n I have no desire to get back together with her, nor do I think she'd be interested in dating me again. However, I'd love for us to be on decent terms and feel like I probably messed that up. \n\nWhat do you all think? Better late than never or better never than late for this kind of thing?", "summary": "Feel guilty about how I treated my ex when we broke up, wondering if I should reach out to apologize and, if so, how."}
{"id": "t3_2at1jj", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by telling a co-worker to slow down", "post": "Last week my boss sent over 2 people to help me on a special project that was getting behind schedule. One of them I know well and the other not so much. The one I don't know very well is a white man from South Africa that left right after apartheid was abolished. Infer from that whatever you will. I had them feeding me data while I was entering it. The weird African dude wasn't doing his part right, causing me to double-check everything he was doing, completely negating any \"help\" he was supposedly providing. Instead of correcting him professionally, I jokingly told him to go back and slow way down because he's making me look bad. What I really meant was slow down and do that shit right ya moron! I just received my corrective counseling for \"unprofessional attitude and behavior which resulted in lost time and resources.\" He went back and told them I was sandbagging the whole operation apparently and \"asked not to be assigned to work under you again.\"", "summary": "Jokingly tell a coworker to slow down cuz he's making me look bad, get written up for wasting time and resources and being unprofessional"}
{"id": "t3_2q3tgw", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Self-consciousness rant", "post": "So I'm 18, male and live in Melbourne Australia. I weigh about 85kg and am always at that weight or +/- 1kg. I've got a bit of fat around and I'm fine with that, makes me more hugable. I know I'm not fat or obese at all, just straight up chubby. Some days I don't even think of how I look and can often go days, even weeks at a time without being self concious. \nThen I'll have a change in mood caused by someone or something annoying me then I'll stare in the mirror and thinking of the excess a fat around the belly button and my man boobs. Some days I change my t-shirt just so it's not as revealing but others I couldn't care less. \nI eat a pretty balanced diet, veggies almost every day, same with fruit, do quite a bit of walking which is incidental but helps to prevent extra kilos staying on. \nLook reddit, I'm one of the lucky ones, I know that, I can not recognise this shit for days at a time but then I lash out on my self and think of how fat I am and blah blah blah.", "summary": "I'm chubby and every now and then I become self concious of it and I'm now ranting on the internet to people who will have this worse than I do."}
{"id": "t3_2hqusm", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Dream of Doggie Death", "post": "I am really jet lagged being day two in Budapest traveling from California. I woke up about 2am CET shaken and crying from a really disturbing dream. My childhood dog, Tammy, golden retriever/dacshund mix, lived until 15yrs old and was put down about 2 years ago. The dream's memorable part was Tammy having a small neck injury, I was taking care of her and cleaning a wound around her neck. Eventually it was like her whole neck had a cut all the way around and I desperately held her head on her body trying to prevent her bleeding out. I had this feeling of absolute dread that my dog was going to die, bleeding out in my arms. I was screaming for help, I couldn't move her as it would expedite her death. She looked at me so dependent, longing, trusting, and fearful of her own mortality. Blood pooled on the ground, and I knew she didn't have long. I woke up crying and confused, and I'm balling as I write this. \n\nI got a new wonderful amazing papijack dog in April. I usually travel with my dog, domestically, but can't internationally due to quarantine laws. I have my boyfriend looking after him and he sends me pictures of their walks and gives me updates. He is taking great care of him and I'll see my boy in about a week when I return. I'm probably just grieving my old dog and probably preparing for the inevitable loss with new dog. He is only 2 years old, so we have a lot of time to look forward to. It is just so sad to outlive your doggie and dreams are too real sometimes. I've had other dreams about BBQing the new dog, performing surgery to save him, ultimately butchering him, and putting him on the BBQ. By the time I realize what I've done it is too late, and I'm sad/appalled I murdered my beloved dog... Dreams are weird, I do love BBQ steaks though.", "summary": "Dreamed gory death of my first childhood dog. Traveling right now and not with new beloved dog right now, missing him. Dreams are crazy."}
{"id": "t3_388qgg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm having (24F) second thoughts about being a bridesmaid to my not-so-best friends (23F) sister (27F).", "post": "This is my first Reddit post so I apologize for any mistakes! \n\nHave you ever had a one sided friendship? Where one person has more benefit than the other? Well I've only had one of these and it so happens to be with my \"best friend\". I've always been there for her, when she got pregnant and aborted, when she got pregnant again and delivered her baby, every time she has had issues with her baby daddy, you get the point. She's been there for me too but for some reason every time we hang out we always talk about her and her problems. She asks general questions about what goes on in my life but nothing too deep. I love her because we've been friends since we were 13 years old. But I'm tired of being a GREAT friend to her when she is barely a friend to me. We've both talked about this (because I brought it up) and even cried about it. We decided we'd try to be more involved in each other's lives but nothing has changed. I'm pretty tired of it because I feel used and I really don't benefit much from this friendship. \n\nSo now getting to my question. Her family loves me. I've never been a bad influence on her, I've been a great friend to her and they see that I love her and her baby.  That's what her sister told me when she asked me to be her bridesmaid last year. Her sister and I get along well and knowing that her list of friends is short I felt bad and told her yes.  Now that we are getting ready to buy bridesmaid dresses and my relationship with my \"best friend\" hasn't gotten better I'm kind of thinking of backing out of this. I know her sister is not at fault here but I don't know if I'd feel comfortable being a bridesmaid anymore. Should I talk to the sister/bride? Should I have another talk with my \"best friend\"? Any advice/help is appreciated.", "summary": "My best friend isn't really a best friend anymore and I don't know if I should still be a bridesmaid for her sisters wedding."}
{"id": "t3_4chzcz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [31/F] bf [31/M] of 3.5 years has developed a severe garlic and onion allergy... how do I support him and figure out what to eat?", "post": "My bf and I have a great relationship, minus a major food issue.\n\nHe's always been intolerant of garlic and onion, but when we met it was far more mild. I never even knew he allergic for the first year we dated. We ate garlic fries once and he got pretty sick, and that was the first time he admitted it to me.\n\nIt's become extremely bad in the past 5 months. He gets sick even from cooked garlic and onion. His worst episode happened recently (he was shivering and having full body spasms with severe abdominal pain, followed by an entire night of running to the toilet). I put my foot down after that. No more cooking with garlic or onion (which is devastating for me, because I ABSOLUTELY ADORE THE SHIT OUT OF THOSE INGREDIENTS). We've tried to be super careful at restaurants, but it's almost impossible to avoid them. This has lead to him pushing for us to just go ahead and do it, and him winding up sick.\n\nI need some ideas about how best to support him so he doesn't feel like he's letting me down, or repressed and stuck eating bland food. Trying out the endless restaurants in our/nearby cities (we live in a foodie paradise land) was one of our favorite things to do together. It's been tough to find an evening activity to replace that. (We still do a lot of stuff that doesn't involve food, like hiking and drinking craft beer, but now we have to go back home after the bar and cook sanitized meals that neither of us are thrilled about, when both of us are in the mood to still be out). \n\nI don't want to struggle with him because he gets frustrated with the impacts this is having on our lifestyle. I know he feels like a burden. But I would rather eat bland food then see him hurt.", "summary": "bf became a vampire, delicious food was something we both shared a passion for, need coping strategies to support him and ideas for things that are still good to eat"}
{"id": "t3_rit8q", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What can I do to stop my mind wandering with other girls?", "post": "Okay for the longer version of this I've been in a relationship with my current GF for about 3 and a half years now and we have been and are still happy together. However whenever I meet a new girl that I think might be slightly into me I can't stop myself from sort of popping a few flirty smiles and looks at them until their interest in me grows. I can do this with multiple girls at a time and I always spend a whole lot of time wondering what things would be like if I left my current GF for one of these girls. Like right now for example there's this girl called 'C' who I only just met in one of my classes, I only found out her name through some serious FB stalking and we always have these moments in lectures and labs, I can tell she's into me and I'm giving a clear vibe that I'm into her. All I can think about is her right now, I don't know anything about her but it just seems like I want to date her..? I don't know what I should do about this because if I get over this girl I generally find a new girl, help?", "summary": "In a relationship for 3 years but always find myself seemingly falling for any girl who's slightly into me and I try to develop it into them seriously liking me, what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2t2xmq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] - when/how do I ask a date about deal breakers?", "post": "Sorry for the awkward title! I've always dated friends before, so I've always leapt into the \"relationship\" phase. The last couple months have been my first time actually dating around, and I've met some great people - but they're still basically strangers.\n\nMy standards are low, but I do have some requirements and don't want to waste my time or choose a guy who doesn't fit my tastes over a guy who does. For example, I don't want to date guys who smoke or do drugs even recreationally (but I do want drinkers) and I want guys who want kids in the future. There's also more specific ones; for example, I've been on two dates with a guy who lives over an hour away from me and while I'm starting to really like him, but I don't want to keep seeing him if I can't sleep over at his place in the future (he rents from an older woman who knows his parents and lives in the other bedroom, so there's a chance I won't be able to). \n\nI'm having trouble figuring out how and when to phrase these questions. Smoking/drugs feel awkward to bring up without context and I don't want to make guys think I'm crazy or trying to get pregnant asap by talking about kids when we're unexclusively dating. Same sort of thing with the guy with the roommate - he's really cute and sweet but we've only kissed once and haven't even mentioned sex. I don't want to scare him off by asking if he can host, be rude by inviting myself over, or make myself sound like a thief.\n\nThese are just examples, but I figure if I can get some advice on these I can extrapolate it to other issues. I do make it clear that I'm looking for long term relationships and I move pretty slowly with everyone.", "summary": "First time dating around, when do I discuss requirements like not smoking, wanting kids, and being able to host sleep overs with dates I barely know?"}
{"id": "t3_1u6rg5", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Question about non-compete clauses...", "post": "So I just received an offer from a company I am thrilled to have the chance to work for. The position is right, the pay is right, and the work/life balance looks to be promising. They sent over a formal offer for me to look at, in addition to an additional agreement that needs signed with a non-compete agreement. I completely understand the need for such an agreement, as the company will be extensively investing their time and resources in training me for the job. They are also one of the few companies that hire in individuals with no experience, so any and all skills I will develop that ae industry specific over the next few months will be thanks to them. While I definitely have no plans to leave the company any time in the near future, the language of the agreement concerns me. The list of jobs that the agreement states will be in breach of the non-compete is way more broad than I feel it should be. It basically limits me from doing any type of research position at any level, regardless of its relation to my actual position I will be taking on. As someone with a science degree, basically all jobs I would be qualified in pursuing in the event of my leaving/termination would be off limits for a year after my last day of employment. The language used in the agreement is very open-ended and broad, and I hesitate to put myself in that position in case something doesn't work. Has anyone else had to sign such a broad non-compete, or has anyone successfully negotiated the terms of a similar agreement? I really want to accept this job, and again I reiterate I have no intentions in leaving the company any time soon. I just don't want to put myself in an impossible situation should I be forced to leave somewhere down the road.`", "summary": "I just got a job offer, but the non-compete clause is a bit too open-ended and broad for my liking. Has anyone else ran into this situation before? How did you handle it?"}
{"id": "t3_3yxzgv", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Realistic Budget-Setting Help", "post": "My wife and I are both college educated. Neither of us are idiots, and we've been casually browsing the 'self-help' budgets around these parts and nothing really seems to hit home. I think this is partially because I have avoidance issues, and am a bit embarrassed by how illiterate I've allowed myself to be (financially) as an adult. \n\nFull disclosure: I've taken a hands-off approach to our personal finances, and I think this has placed an unfair burden on my wife. I fully intend to change this. \n\nIt's time for me to help wrangle our monthly finances and start making our money work for us. \n\nAs a baseline: we have roughly $750 left over from my paychecks after taking care of all of our set bills (Student Loans, Car Payment, etc.). We still need to eat, pay for gas, and prepare for general living expenses. \n\nMy question is - how should I go about building a realistic budget? We both come from bad families, and didn't have any early-life financial literacy...I'm just feeling overwhelmed with the learning curve to financial success. \n\nI understand the general tenets of being financially sound: define a budget, don't spend more than you earn, don't max out credit cards, etc. But what I'm really hoping to get is someone to say: \"You have $750, this is what I would do with it\" while keeping in mind that I still need to eat, etc.", "summary": "I have $750 every month after monthly bills to feed/clothe myself and my wife. How should we go about maximizing that money?"}
{"id": "t3_10i9m8", "subreddit": "running", "title": "I need recommendations for a weight training plan to recover from weight loss from running.", "post": "Back story: I am a 26 year old male who has fallen in love with running. In September of last year my house was flooded. It was obviously a stressful time for my wife and me. We had to stay with her parents while we sorted out our mess of a house. Long story short between gutting our old house, selling it, buying a new one, and living with her parents and eating her mom's cooking and tons of restaurant meals I packed on some extra gut weight.\n\nThose pictures show where I was when we moved into the new house and where I am now. I started running seriously around May. I have been gradually increasing my mileage since then to about 80 miles a month with an average of 20 a week. I would like to keep bumping that up but it seems like the weight loss I am experiencing is taking from places I would rather not lose. My chest, shoulders and arms are getting to be a little skeletorish for my liking and when I run into people I haven't seen for a while they ask if I have been sick.\n\nSo if you are still reading the question I have for you all is if you have any recommendations for a good weight training plan to complement my running that would help add back a little bulk? Also as far as diet goes should I be increasing my caloric intake? I get around 2000 a day from nuts, lunch meat, pastas, and chicken or pork for supper. Obviously I also eat other things but those are my normal everyday foods. As far as supplements go I have a protein shake after any run over 6 miles for recovery. \n\nI have an Olympic sized weight bench and pull up bar along with various weight dumbbells. So any recommendations?", "summary": "I run and have lost weight in the wrong spots, I need recommendations for a good weight training plan that doesn't interfere with running too much."}
{"id": "t3_1lnanp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[20F] had a conversation with my boyfriend [22M] of a year and a half about me being more confident", "post": "Last night my boyfriend and I had a conversation. He was very upset and had been acting funny all weekend. I finally got it out of him yesterday that he is upset because I am not confident enough. He says that it wears on him and makes him feel bad when I compare myself to other girls or for instance I deleted him off instagram (I told him before I did it) becasue it made me feel insecure having him \"like\" girls pictures. \n\nThat being said, I have recently been disagnosed with general anxiety disorder and have frequent panic attacks. One of my triggers is feeling abandoned and when I feel threatened by other girls or compare myself I get really anxious. There is nothing that he does to make me feel this way but my anxiety takes over. I am currently in counselling to work on my anxiety.\n\nI agreed to work on my confidence because it is something that I would like to improve for myself not just for him. As I work on myself how can I show him that I am working on it so that he can feel more at ease. Also how can I be more confident and not feel threatened.", "summary": "Boyfriend wants me to be more confident, how can I show him i'm working on it and how can I be more confident within the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_l128j", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's your most terrible wish that has come true?", "post": "Here's mine, it doesn't actually affect other people, just me, but still sucks.\n\nI remember sitting in health class, learning about genetic diseases and wishing that I had one, because that would be a cool thing to talk about. (Shallow? Yes. I was in 7th grade, who wasn't shallow)\nCome 8th grade, my mom tells me over the phone that I carry Tay-Sachs disease, which if I produce kids with another carrier, my child will die by age 2.  Also, a rare form of the disease manifests itself in the 20's, so that could be a fun surprise.\nAlso I have congenital cataracts in my right eye.", "summary": "I wished for a disease and found out I carry Tay-Sachs disease and have congenital cataracts."}
{"id": "t3_1woj4q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [M19] with ex [F18]. we have hooked up and plan to do it again, generally just confused about it all.", "post": "So I dated this girl for 9 months and we broke up in September. We started to talk recently and became friends. We have talked and I admitted I still like her and would be with her if I had the chance but I know I don't so I don't worry about it and live my life.\n\nProblem is, whenever I see her she is seducing me. She convinced me to get a hotel room with her, when I see her she makes out with me or grabs my hair and pulling my head down and kissing my neck. She claims she has no feelings for me but calls and texts me every day and we talk about everything from if she is sad to just casual stuff  and every time I see her she can't seem to keep her hands off me. She also talks about how she wants to be the best I have had.\n\nNow I am fine with this casual hookup because we are great friends and we are just having fun, but her behavior is really starting to confuse me.", "summary": "ex i still have feelings for claims she doesn't have feelings for me but tries to get with me all the time and calls constantly."}
{"id": "t3_4ujih4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My now ex-girlfriend [18] broke up with me[20] almost 3 months ago, after trying to get back, she is getting married", "post": "Hello, so yeah she's getting married. At the beginning of may she left me over some stupid argument. After some days we talked about our feelings and such, but nothing happened. We told each other that we still miss each other and so on, but I was having difficult time, so I had to think a lot. \n\nA month passes by and I see on her facebook wall a photo with another dude [23] and caption said \"We're happy\" and I immediately got angry and wrote her. She told me he was just a friend, I believed her. The next evening we met up at her place, talked casually and then sex happened. While we were having sex, she told me that she loves me, I told her that I love her too. Sweet, maybe this will work out.\n\nAfter that for a few days we chatted, then met up again, had sex, usual couple things.. Then she started ignoring me. Then suddenly that \"friend\" became a boyfriend. So then our relationship was like a roller-coaster. One day she loves me, other she doesn't. We would hang out together, kiss and stuff, and then nothing again.\n\nWell, last week I get a message, that she is getting married with that \"friend\" (few days before that, she told me that she still likes me, and kissed a bunch). I couldn't believe it. I was trying to talk her out of that for the past week, but nothing came of it. She told me that she understands that she rushed it, that it can be a mistake and such, even told me that she doesn't love me. Yesterday she met up with a mutual friend, and she told that friend that she is happy, that she doesn't want to see me, and will call cops if I come near her. Now that I confronted her about how she cheated with me on her future husband she got angry.\n\nSo their wedding date is on August 13th, only over 3 months will be passed after our breakup. Which I still can't believe.", "summary": "Girlfriend broke off with me, found a new guy, cheated on him with me (while I was hoping to get back together) and now they're getting married."}
{"id": "t3_3bsyr4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my GF [26 F] 1.5 years, does she like me?", "post": "Me and my GF have been dating for 1.5 years, she's temporarily living with me (got a new job, only a few months, she's moving into an apartment soon). \n\nAnyways, have been dating for 1.5 years, we took it slow (didn't kiss her until like 3 months in) and the furthest I've gotten with her is 1st base aka we made out some for about a month or two then she stopped. She gives me kisses on the lips but no tongue/anything passionate. \n\nI asked her about it when it first occurred and she said everything was fine and she was going to kiss me how she liked, then I brought it up on our 1 year anniversary and she said she was worried about her breath then she said she was worried about 1 thing leading to another and getting pregnant. \n\nSo, I haven't made out with my girlfriend in literally over a year. What bugs me more is that she was a sexual deviant with her ex yet she won't even give me a good kiss. You think she's actually worried about getting knocked up or have I been put in the friend zone and she's afraid of being alone?", "summary": "GF of 1.5 years doesn't kiss kiss me but she was a freak with her ex. Am I in the friend zone?"}
{"id": "t3_2capq1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My fiancee [25F] would like me [25M] to contribute 50% to her mortgage without putting me on the deed. Is this reasonable?", "post": "My fiancee and I have been engaged for 2 months and together for 6 years. We have no issues living with each other and are very happy with each other.\n\nWe are currently living in her house and I am paying her rent equal to half her mortgage. We split all other expenses. I'm okay with this arrangement but I had hoped after we get married, that all property would be owned mutually. She does not.\n\nShe would like to keep her house in her name only as well as have me continue to contribute 50% to her mortgage. It feels like I'd be putting money into her backup plan instead of our lives but she was adamant that the house remain hers entirely. She would also like to get a prenup that says in the event of a divorce she gets to keep the house, but assures me that I would get 50% of the equity gained during the marriage.\n\nI understand wanting some protection against divorce but this seems unfair to me. I am looking for some perspective here. Is this a reasonable request of hers to have me contribute 50% to the mortgage once married and not own it mutually?", "summary": "Fiancee would like me to contribute 50% to her mortgage but not own any part of it. Is this reasonable?"}
{"id": "t3_fr0g3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My psycho ex left a message last night saying to watch my children and those I hold dear to me, any advice?", "post": "Back story: We have two kids together, he last saw the oldest when she was 2 (she's 6) and has never met the youngest, who is 3 now. When we broke up, he said if he couldn't have me, he didn't want any of us. We broke up because he was a violent alcoholic and I asked him to quit drinking or leave.\n\nHe has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and told me once that he had been diagnosed with schizophrenia. I don't know the difference between the truth and lies, as I believe him to be a pathological liar as well. \n\nThe obvious answer is go to the police. At this point, I don't have his address. I believe I know what state he is in, but that is about it. Also, if I do manage to get a restraining order, and have him served, it will give him my address. This terrifies me. \n\nThings said in the message: I love you, I hate you, it is your fault my mother killed herself, watch your children and those you hold dear, blatant threats to my mother, my father, and my \"little husband\" (my fiance,) \"I'm closer than you think,\" \"I will kill you\" and some babble that makes little sense. \n\nAs I type this, I become more and more scared that he's on reddit and will see it. He has gotten me that paranoid.", "summary": "My ex may kill me and our children, but if I go to the police he will get my address, making it easier for him to kill us."}
{"id": "t3_158ks5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "In light of the NRA press conference, Would/How would change gun laws, and/or the right to bear arms?", "post": "I find this particular subject to debate very thought provoking; Would gun laws change the amount of violence on U.S. soil? I mean isn't it fair to think that a criminal who wants to break a law would also break the law to carry a gun as well?\n\nHow would changing the law allow Law Enforcement/Military the verbage to bear arms, wear they can bear arms and so forth?\n\nAs a Law Enforcement officer I never owned a gun before I became a cop, and I rarely carry it while off-duty, however knowing I have one when I do carry it does present a sense of security. Changing the laws to be tighter over civilians would also make the job to police somewhat easier as well.", "summary": "I see both sides of the gun law coin, and I'm not smart enough to figure out a change for the best."}
{"id": "t3_o7agt", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "First Date Question - Need Opinions!", "post": "Hey, looking for some opinions.  I'm M 23, she's F 22.\n\nI met a girl on OkCupid and took her out last night (Jan 6).  We met up at a bar and had a great time.  We went through 3 rounds of drinks, sharing the last two rounds.  I really had a great time and felt very comfortable talking to her.  We agreed that the date was going really well and that we would see each other again.  The date lasted just around 2 hours.\n\nNow, I would have gone in for a kiss, or developed some kino, but I got the impression from her that she would want to move slower.  She had brought up an ex boyfriend (red flag, but the discussion was more about what we had learned from our past relationships).  We also discussed casual sex, and how we weren't interested in it. Again, I was very comfortable talking to her about these issues, which is uncommon for me. These topics suggested to me that moving slower would be best.\n\nSo, today, I text her for a second date.  But she replies that she got a \"friend vibe\" from the date.  So, now I'm kicking myself in the foot for not going for that kiss or developing some kino.\n\nI'm very tempted to email/text her and explain my outlook and how I feel.  I very much enjoyed the date and felt that we could have had something.  I feel like I screwed up. =/  Is this a good idea??  If not, I just need to rant...", "summary": "Had a great date. No kiss/kino because discussion led me to believe she wanted to move slower.  Got friend zoned, no second date.  Kicking self in foot, want to win her back"}
{"id": "t3_11zs61", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, thinking about portraying PFC Bradley Manning for Halloween, good idea or bad idea?", "post": "For Halloween this year, I am considering going as Private First Class Bradley Manning (if you don't know who he is, Google the name). It's certainly not your typical Halloween costume by any means, but I usually don't do the typical thing.\n\nI want to represent Bradley in good taste while offering information to my friends and co-workers about the history of what lead up to the charges against him, the current state of the trial, info about Wikileaks and what we have learned from the various leaks, Julian Assange and the allegations against him, etc. I only intend on dressing up at work and at home on Halloween so as to not be viewed as impersonating a soldier or breaking the uniform law in any way. I'm not going to force my opinion onto anyone, just offer only the facts if asked.\n\nThere has been some controversial costumes worn in the past, so I don't have any reason to believe that it would be taken the wrong way, but I also don't want to tread on taboo or anything that might offend or upset anyone at my work place.", "summary": "So Reddit, am I off my rocker in wanting to be Bradley Manning for Halloween or shall I go for it?"}
{"id": "t3_4aa0p1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] recently broke up with my girlfriend [21 F] of 1 year over \"not giving enough effort\"", "post": "So to start off, this is my first post here. \n\nThe relationship was great for roughly 7/8 months. We hit a rough patch towards the end of December. The reason that we broke up was because she didn't think I was giving enough (though I thought I was). I had ever intention of trying to make it work and changing myself for her, and she wanted that. This past week, however, we both went on spring break, me on a cruise and her to California to see family. On her trip, she went with some family friend (not of her's, I think her aunt's) and now she \"realizes\" that he is better than me.. \n\nI think I loved her (she loved me a lot). When I say I \"think I loved her\" it's more because I have an issue with loneliness, and settle when someone I \"think\" I like comes by. Now I'm jealous, feeling very alone, and unsure if I can ever give enough.\n\nDoes anyone have an issue not giving enough in a relationship or try to appease the person so they are not lonely?", "summary": "Girlfriend and I went on a rough patch, she found someone better than me, now its over. Anyone not give enough in a relationship/settle to avoid loneliness?"}
{"id": "t3_334kv1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [00 M/F] with my ___ [00 M/F] duration, short-description", "post": "Link to original post: \n\nSo we ended up talking about everything last night. I told him all of my worries, and how I felt about the situation. He seemed to have something to say about everything I said. He was very comforting, and I felt like he really cared about me feels towards it all.\n\nAbout her coming down and everything, he basically just said he wants to close the door on that part of his life for good. She wanted to come and see his brother as well, hang out and catch up since it's been so long. He also reassured me that nothing would happen between them, that he is with me and she understands and respects that.\n\nI also asked if he felt that we have a future together, and he said for now he sees that, so long as nothing changes. I still feel kind of off about everything, but as I said I am a very anxious person. So I am just hoping that these are just irrational feelings that I have. Either way, i'll just say that I am just wanting this whole ordeal to be over, and for things to get back to normal.\n\nI would also like to give a big thank you to everyone who commented, it means a lot, and i'm sorry if I didn't have a chance to reply to all of them.", "summary": "Talked with him last night, he reassured me that he just wants to close that chapter in his life, I feel better, but still worried about the visit."}
{"id": "t3_3qym7b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my mother [41F]: Mom is freaking out because I don't want pillows on my bed.", "post": "This is kind of insane behavior. \n\nI moved out six weeks ago. I was paying rent, but I couldn't live with someone who went through my shit like I was 14. \n\nI saved enough to get a studio apartment. I am fully employed, go to school part time, and am single. So I am pretty focused on my own stuff at the moment. I got a kitten, but that isn't the point of contention. \n\nMy mom insisted my room be decorated to her standards, which included making the bed every day with 20 pillows arranged like the magazine picture. It drove me insane. \n\nI am a really minimalistic person. I like color, funky prints, but I don't want a clutter of knick-nacks. \n\nSo when I moved out, I took my sheets and the pillow I slept on, but left the rest of it. I got a comforter, and just have two pillows on there. I sleep on those. The bed doesn't look \"magazine perfect\" but its easy. I make my bed every day. \n\nI am like my dad [60m] and want things to be nice, neat, and clutter free. I don't keep tons of things I don't need or use. I am just very simple in that regard. Even my fashion sense is pretty straight forward. \n\nHowever, my mom keeps coming to visit me and bringing pillows and other things for my home that I don't want. Some of the stuff was cute (there was a pillow with a bull dog on it I kept.) But I don't want frilly floral things all over the house. \n\nI paid for the furniture myself and I can afford everything. But she is literally trying to fill my house with things I don't need. I told her to take it back or I would donate what I didn't want. I ended up taking a huge amount (5 large garbage bags full) of shit she brought me. And she still continues to do it. \n\nIDK what the fuck is going on, but she keeps thinking the space is her space. I am not sure what to do?", "summary": "My mother keeps trying to clutter my space with pillows and knick nacks, which I have told her I don't want in my new apartment. I want her to stop. How can I get her to stop!?"}
{"id": "t3_v9s1x", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[29/m] My gf (21/f) is deeply angry at me after a fight and she also studying for her exams, how can i save this?", "post": "We had a big fight last week because she had problems studying and i asked her to take a break and have a walk to clear up her mind to go on better. She is now deeply angry at me because she says i don't understand her and support her the way she wants to, she is also threatening me with a break up. I can barely speak to her (we are rarely talking via txt in these days) and she has a very stressful exam at school tomorrow. I know this, and in my last txt i said that i am sorry for what happened, that i DO care about her study and that she should focus on her exam instead of thinking about all this situation. I really don't know how to fix things up and i am afraid of losing her just because of some exams stress -_", "summary": "my gf is threatening to break up with me because i can't support her the way she wants when she is stressed for her exams"}
{"id": "t3_2gcm1a", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Just turned 18 and want to build my credit", "post": "I have been working since 16 and make around $12,000 annually with a small amount of expenses (gas, car insurance). I literally just turned 18 and felt that it would be a good idea to get a credit card. I honestly don't need it to \"make purchases I can't afford\" but I really just want one to start building my credit.\n\nI talked with my Dad about it and he said that applying for a store card like Best Buy (where I work actually) would be a good idea or that getting a secured credit card would also be a good idea. I prefer the secured credit card route due to being able to use it anywhere and I can't see myself actually using a store card consistently as I do not shop at one place consistently.\n\nWhat are some of the best secured Credit Cards to get? I'm not worried about a high credit limit, I just want my credit to go up and be good, for a lack of better words. My current debit card is with a Credit Union and I read that those and Capital One are usually the best route to go with.\n\nI also wanted to know if it is better to with Visa, Mastercard, Discover, AMEX ETC.", "summary": "Just turned 18 and have had steady income for two year and want to build credit through secured credit card, what is best route for me to take."}
{"id": "t3_2pc0z1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] boyfriend [24M] of 1.5 years will fail out of college, should we break up?", "post": "I go to a very prestigious college, and \"have so much potential\" as many people say. I hope to become a doctor one day. My boyfriend however, was kicked out of his college at the age of 22. We met as he was working to save money for college and I had just graduated from highschool. He now goes to another college, but recently failed a class. This will put him off from graduating a whole year again. So that by the time he graduates, if he even does, he will be 26.\n\nIt concerns me that this is the second time he has messed up. He lacks motivation to do his work. I love him so much. He tells me we need to end this because I deserve better. But I can't imagine my life without him. He will not be able to take classes this spring semester, and we don't really know what he is going to do. He might go and frack for a bit.", "summary": "so does anyone have experience with being with someone you fear may become a deadbeat? I am in love with him and can't be without him; but everyone, including him, tells me I need to move on."}
{"id": "t3_319klg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] with my girlfriend [16F], she has some emotional issues that are tough to describe", "post": "Hi /r/relationships[1] ! I love this subreddit and lurk on my main account. However, I try to keep my main account rather professional, as I mod a couple subs and don't wanna hurt my own reputation when a throwaway is this simple to make. But anyway! More about the problem at hand.\n\nI have a close friend, who we will call \"Joann.\" She's one of my closet friends who I really have an intellectual bond with and I want to help her. She's insanely smart and pretty, but she has a problem that's restricting part of her life.\n\nOver freshman and sophomore year, she had a romantic relationship with a guy who we will call Kenyan, because that's his name and it's a little less unique than Joann's real name. Anyway, they were never really official but they flirted a lot and he acted committed and Joann got really attached to him. She is a Mormon so she was adamant about not being anything official until she was 16. He was super excited to be her first kiss but in the meantime dated his rotation of girls. Joann finally realized how bad he was for her on her 16th birthday. He was dating another girl, and when he leaned in to kiss her, she simply said \"save it for your girlfriend,\" and that was all the closure they had. No contact after.\n\nThis is a problem because she's still super attached to him. See, I'm posting because we've been talking tonight and like usual, we got into a deep talk. What she told me was bone chilling. She saw a video with him in it and she almost puked. She says it's a \"combination of adrenaline and a flood of emotions from seeing him,\" that quote was pulled directly from our texts. \n\nI guess my point is not to make a point of her emotional issues, but to see if there's a solution or a process that I can take to help her heal? I hate seeing her like this and I'm not really an emotional intelligence aficionado so I was wondering if you could help, /r/relationships[2] . What advice do you have for me?", "summary": "Girlfriend has some personal issues that I would like to help with, can you guys help or even point in the right direction?"}
{"id": "t3_1421la", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] am worried that my SO [26M] is taking advantage of me.", "post": "I [19F] am worried that my SO [25M] is taking advantage of me. We both have a lot going for us, but he comes with some old, hurtful relationship baggage. He's gone after a lot of floozy's before, but I'm certainly not one of them. Also, he's always highly critical of me, and doesn't think of my opinions as often as he should. I'm younger, and I'm very nice and get taken advantage of easily. I'm not ready to settle down yet, but I keep getting pressure from both of our families. We have been together for a year and a half now.", "summary": "How do I know he's serious about me, and doesn't just think I'm a good choice for his future?"}
{"id": "t3_10ohf1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it normal for M(21) and F(20) to approach future plans hesitantly?", "post": "Reddit,\n\nI've M(21) been with my GF F(20) for about 3 months now (dating for another 2 before hand) and we're perfectly happy together. No fights, arguments, ect. The issue is this, whenever either of us bring up an event that would be in the distant future we both make the concious effort to first say, \"assuming we're still together...\" before saying the event.... \n\nFor example: My girlfriends birthday is next year, she wants to go to Vegas (totally down), but before she started to bring up the idea she said, \"So for my 21st birthday, I think it would be awesome to go to Vegas! *insert momentary pause* Not saying we're going to break up, but assuming we're still together it would be so much fun if we went with a bunch of people... (and so on)\" \n\nI tend to do the same thing, when bringing up a future event, ill kind of throw in the fact that \"We'll cross that bridge when we get there but it would be awesome if next year we... (blah blah blah).\" \n\nIs that normal? Or does the fact we consciously entertain the idea that we COULD eventually break up mean that there's something inherently wrong in the relationship? I feel like normally people dont even have the thought of \"possible break up in the future\" in their heads. \n\nI realize the relationship is also young in its maturity, but never the less the question still stands. Thanks in advance reddit.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I make it a point to mention that we may or may not still be together in the future before making plans for a future event... is that normal?"}
{"id": "t3_38k7xi", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Trainer offered to introduce me [23M]to one of his other female [23F] clients. Should I take him up on it?", "post": "Been going to the gym and seeing a trainer for a while now, between sets he likes to people watch and loves to point out any nice looking girls. We talk and go through my routine and there has always been this one girl who has caught my eye when she is there. \n\nMy trainer noticed this and asked who it was that has been catching my attention, when I told him he said that he trained her and would be happy to introduce us. Which sounds great, but I don't know anything about this girl outside of really liking the way she looks.\n\nI'm not socially awkward but unless I have some background information or a mutual interest I'm not good at talking to strangers, especially this really attractive girl. \n\nThe one rule I know about the gym is that people are there to workout, not socialize, I'm pretty sure that having a random guy approach this girl mid workout would be the last thing she'd want in her life so I'd rather not have that be my first impression.\n\nDoes anyone have any suggestions?\nI'm completely content with not pursuing this, because I like this gym a lot and would rather have things stay as they are then introduce a new worry of whether or not I'd have to hide from a failed attempt at hitting on this girl", "summary": "Trainer at the gym offered to introduce me to a cute girl that has been catching my attention but I have no idea what her interests are, also don't want to have a first impression be me interrupting her workout."}
{"id": "t3_1enc7b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Not sure if I (23f) should give it another shot with him (28m) ?", "post": "I'll try to make this as short as possible. \n\nWe had been seeing each other for about a month when I impulsively decided that we should stop (I had my reasons, there were a few red flags but instead of talking to him about them I just assumed I was right and so I broke it off). When he agreed with me and told me he saw signs of jealousy with me, I got ticked and blew up on him. Blew up meaning, I went absolutely nuts. For no reason! I am still trying to figure out why I can't hold onto my emotions when it comes to stuff like this.\n\nAnyways, we got into a fight and it ended badly. This was about a month ago. He called me the other night, tipsy. I eventually answered after the third call, and we talked for about thirty minutes. I told him I was sorry for the way I acted and that I do realize that it was absolutely crazy and irrational. He said he wants to give it another shot, and I told him I would think about it and get back to him. I did a few days later and told him I'm willing to talk to him face to face and see what happens. Alls he said was \"okay.\" \n\nI had feelings for him and we get along really well. If I had communicated my feelings properly, none of this would have happened. I am still learning to express my emotions in a healthy manner. My question is, should I give it another shot with him?", "summary": "Guy wants to give it another shot after I pulled out the 'crazy' on him and didn't speak for a month."}
{"id": "t3_2pk733", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (27M) GF (26F) is only loving and empathetic when it's convenient to her", "post": "We've lived together for a month now and we are usually very happy together but we've also survived a lot of shit already. Bad friendships, new dog, kicking a housemate out for her. After every tense situation, I am the one apologizing and I understand I haven't handled things exactly as she wanted, but it worries me how few mistakes she has admitted and how empathetic she is not. I read recently that people who love you are by your side even when you suck. I feel that is the only time when we are not close. Like the success of this relationship depends on my ability to make x number of mistakes or fewer. Shouldn't it be more about understanding each others' intentions and avoiding offending each other, while forgiving mistakes? I feel that she has never really forgiven me. Each time I apologize she accepts it as if I said \"it won't happen again\" instead of accepting it because it was an honest miscommunication or mistake. Similarly, she rarely apologizes because she is who she is. I'll admit that she makes very few mistakes but the ones she makes are very personal like not paying attention to me when I am sad or not acknowledging the legitimacy of my feelings. She is an affectionate person but only on her own time. There are very specific occasions that people need a hug or a shoulder and she does not look for ways to console me in those times, despite my requests that she be more attentive. I do not want to leave her but I will if need be. We are very compatible, save for this caveat (but it feels like a big one). What can I do to let her know that I generally feel disrespected and unappreciated? I have told her many times and she says \"oh sure I can be nicer\" but doesn't acknowledge the severity of it and then she doesn't change, which is particularly frustrating because I have changed a lot of things in my life for her.", "summary": "my gf is self-centered, which I don't mind except when I need attention or sympathy and she doesn't try to support me"}
{"id": "t3_1qk1n2", "subreddit": "self", "title": "My personal life is getting in the way of my education.", "post": "I'm not sure how this will go, so please bare with me.\n\nMy parents are separating after 20something years. They have always had issues, never got married and haven't slept in the same room/bed for 16 years. \n\nThey have said a couple times over the past 15ish years that they were going to separate, but never did. Just empty words. But now my mom has a date to move and is asking me and my sister to \"pick sides.\" \n\nMy boyfriend and I have been having issues since he got kicked out of his house 3 weeks ago and has been living with my family since then. However, he should be moving back home this week. But that extra strain has been exhausting.\n\nBesides all of this, I have severe anxiety and depression. I receive \"disability support\" through my university, but all it really does is allow me to take my tests in a separate room. I also have concentration issues and just passed a screening for ADD. \n\nOn top of all this my piece of shit laptop has broken down for the 4th time in less than 2 years. I have a 5 page paper due tomorrow that I haven't started due to all of the above factors. I feel like school isn't for me, and I'm not going to pass this semester, putting me on academic probation.\n\nI just feel like everything around me is crumbling with little control over it all.\nI just needed to talk to somebody because I'm currently in my car in my school's parking lot crying like a little bitch.", "summary": "My parents are separating after 20+ years, my boyfriend has been living with my family for 3 weeks since he got kicked out which is causing issues between us, and it's very hard to do my schoolwork."}
{"id": "t3_oh2w7", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Found a site that places you in pubs across England, thoughts and opinions?", "post": "The site is [www.londonpub.com.au]  \n\nI am a Canadian living and working in a small town that is...quite frankly, really boring.  There's just not much going on!  When I finished high school, I went and worked at a bed and breakfast in PEI.  That was nice, but still really quiet.  When the season ended, I went to Scotland and then went around the UK for 2 months.  It was awesome!  I loved the whole experience, but I especially liked London.  The hustle and bustle of the city, the sheer numbers of people, the transport, the pubs, everything.  There always something to see or do!  I ended up going back to Europe a few months later (for 2.5 months).  Thing is...I still haven't got it out of my system!  I'd love to go over there and work for the summer (or longer) but I'm not sure how to go about it.\n\nThis site seems almost too good to be true, it's exactly what I want.  The application fee is a bit steep though.  Does anyone have experience with this company or something similar?  Is there better ways to get my foot in the door?  Is there scams and such that I should look out for?\n\nI'm very lucky in the fact that I have a have full time job that will still be available should I choose to go abroad for a few months.  Also, I work in a trade (of sorts) that is pretty much universal.  I was thinking of taking up some part time work doing what I'm doing here, but in England.", "summary": "[www.londonpub.com.au] This site seems to be perfect for what I'm after...what's the catch?  Also, thoughts/opinions/experiences working in the England?"}
{"id": "t3_14gr4w", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I'm so pissed off at Lenovo right now", "post": "November 20th I order a laptop from Lenovo.  ~$1000 laptop.  Two days later, it goes on sale for $100 cheaper.  I contact Lenovo and to see if I can get the $100 discount on my order since it didn't ship yet.  Worst case scenario I though was that I would cancel my original order and re-buy the laptop.\n\nI contact Lenovo, and they say they have no record of my order at all. I can't even cancel my order since it's not even in their system.  I'm like \"WTF\".  The customer service rep said she would get back to me later that day and she didn't.\n\nI wait 2 days and contact them again.  I tell the new customer service rep (his name is Smee in this story) my scenario and show him my confirmation email.  He doesn't have any record of my order and says he will get back to me later in the day to give me an update.  He says he can't find anything relating to my order so he tells me I should order it again.\n\nI order it again...\n\nNext day I receive an email from him \"Hello Mr.teleporterdown, sorry for the inconvenience but we found your original order.  I will cancel your order now.\"\n\nApparantly there was some \"error\" or something.  I asked what it was but he never told me.\n\n2 days later my order status still says \"ready for shipping\".  I contact the customer service rep and ask him if he canceled it (and what was the status of my original order since I received no contact from Lenovo after I talked to Smee.  He told me that he put in the request to cancel the order and my package will be sent out sometime that week.\n\nI wait a day, and contact Lenovo again.... \n\nTo make a long story short: They never canceled my order and I'm getting charged for 2 laptops.  They tell me it's simple to return items, but just from what I've been through with them, I don't know how long until I get my $1000 back.\n\n...Not to mention I never got the $100 discount.", "summary": "Lenovo lost my order, told me to order again, never canceled new order like they said they did, I'm out $1100 atm."}
{"id": "t3_nun9q", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Difference between HDD (Hard Drive Disk) and SSD (Solid State Drive)?", "post": "I recently got a laptop for christmas. While looking over the options I noticed I had the choice of a HDD or SSD. I have a few questions. 1. Why is it that SSD seem to not be able to have the same capacity of HDD? I see HDD that can hold 2TB, while I see SSD that can usually only store 500-750GB. 2. Is there a difference in how the memory is stored on the drive? For instance: Is file \"X\" going to take up less space on a SSD because of the way it is stored? I understand that RAM takes segments of your HDD and breaks it down to send it to the processor (I know it's more complex than that, but for the sake of time). Since a SSD is flash memory, is it faster at doing this?", "summary": "Pros and Cons of HDD and SDD. Is there a difference in the way data is saved? Why do most SSD have less capacity than HDD?"}
{"id": "t3_10d20l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My mom is a hoarder! Have any of you had to deal with someone who was a hoarder? What can be done to stop this?", "post": "For a while now we have known my mom is a pack rat. We really didn't think much of it at the time as she would get rid of things here and there. Lately my mom has gotten out of control. She has 3 closet full of clothing, 4 dresser, and about 15 containers stacked up to the ceiling in the basement. She never wears ANY of these clothing items. She keeps broken pots and pans, expired food, empty boxes, old children books (hundred of them) old toys (hundreds of those as well) when we have no children around. I cannot even tell you the condition of the cupboards. There is clutter everywhere, all over the house. Of course it's not as bad as the t.v show but there is 17 packs of toilet paper in the basement. The excuse is \"it was on sale\" same reasons why we have no room for the food she buys. We have gossip mags from 2002. Every month my dad and I have been pulling out bags of garbage and junk while she is away or at work. She fills it all back up by the time we can take more out. I am talking about 5-10 garbage bags full. You can't even tell there is a difference! When she finds out we have done this she get's beyond pissed. She even threatened divorce over GARBAGE. She didn't even know what was missing. Today I drew the line when I found some old coats of mine from when I was a toddler. They were in the back of the coat closet covered in dust. It was so thick I had to cover my nose. There was bugs on the fur and the material looked like it was rotting on its own. We have tried talking to her many many many times. She won't go to therapy she won't even talk to her friends. She is also becoming a nasty person.\n\nHas anyone has personal experience with hoarding or known someone who was a hoarder?  Help, advice, suggestions, stories, anything!?", "summary": "Mom is a hoarder. She won't listen when we talk to her about it. She's becoming a nasty person. Clutter everywhere."}
{"id": "t3_2zbl7v", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by telling my parents how I really feel", "post": "So, I'm growing up in a very religious family, but in my religion I've always been taught that it's very important to make choices for myself. My parents have affirmed that to me many times. And about two years ago I started to think and realize that I don't really want to be in the church, but I didn't want to tell anyone because I didn't want to disrespect anyone. Then a few months ago, I finally couldn't take it anymore, I started to get annoyed by what many people were telling me in my three hour long meetings. I just overall wasn't very happy.\n\nSo naturally I faked being sick the next Sunday, didn't go to church and had no association to religion for the next two weeks (you can't be sick just one week). It was the happiest I'd been in a long time, no worries about a god that I didn't believe in watching my every move. \n\nThen another Sunday came, I knew my parents would start to get on me after three weeks of \"sickness\" so I decided to come out and tell them that I didn't want to be a part of their church anymore. It was one of the hardest things I've had to do, My dad was not pleased with this. He just assumed that society broke me and I had been spending too much time out in the world, so he grounded me, but not only that he restricted my every move. So this has led me into depression and It's soo hard to leave the house now, but it's also the only way I can come close to being happy.", "summary": "I told my parents that I can't stand being a mormon, and my raged me into a depression (fun times *sarcastic smile*)"}
{"id": "t3_4exwxb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19M] just failed a test for a college class and once my mom [~40F] find out, she will kick me out of the house", "post": "About 5 minutes ago I went in and took a test that I didn't study for at all and failed it. I know this is entirely my fault. However, my mom is extremely concerned about how good my grades are (rightly so, since she pays for half of my tuition) and once she finds out I failed, she might kick me out of the house.\n\n I've been meaning to tell her that I don't care about school as much as she wants me to and that I would just save up enough money to pay for it all for myself so she doesn't have to worry anymore. How can I tell her this without making her furious? She gets very emotional about things like this to the point where she loses her common sense.", "summary": "My mom pays for half my college tuition. I most likely failed one of my classes. When she finds out, she might kick me out of the house. Help"}
{"id": "t3_3whkn9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I recently quit my first job out of college and feel like a loser. How can I land on my feet? [F23]", "post": "I was a workaholic in college and, accordingly, attained a high-paying management position at a Fortune 50 company. Unfortunately, it was not as amazing of an opportunity as I hoped it would be. It never paid me on time and I was forced to take out loans from my parents in order to pay for groceries and bills. It relocated me 80 plus miles away from my fiance, family, and friends a week before I was supposed to report to my permanent location. It gradually increased the hours I was supposed to work, until I was working 60+ hours a week and being forced to work on holidays. To top it all off, it had an extremely hostile work environment where people frequently yelled, cried, and tore each other down.\n\nFor all of these reasons, and many more, I abandoned the position after four months. When I took the job, I thought I had the next several years of my life perfectly planned out, and feel like a total loser for bailing. My finace told me that I seem a lot happier after quitting the job and reassured me that it was the right decision. Nevertheless, after three weeks of job hunting with no \"perfect\" replacement job, I can't help but feel discouraged.\n\nDoes anyone have any advice for me moving forward?", "summary": "I quit my first job after college after four months and feel like a loser. How do I land on my feet?"}
{"id": "t3_36ahlh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] trying to understand if second chances exist?", "post": "Assume you truly liked someone but something happened that kinda turned you off to them.  Nothing ridiculously bad such as abuse or being cheated on, but something along of the lines of not being emotionally available to someone and/or briefly losing that connection/spark you had with them.  Basically something that causes you to question if they actually like you or not.  Like you have doubts as to whether or not the other person likes you when originally you thought they really liked you.\n\nWould you take them back and give them a second chance?\n\nI think this happened to me - a girl doesn't know if I actually like her.  I know the typical advice for me is to move on, but in my past, I've had this happen before in which the vibe changes and actually coming on strong and apologizing ends up working.  (In fact for some reason it seems to happen a lot to me - I've had to apologize twice in my past and got second chances).  The only issue is having her believe that you are being genuine...and that's hard.  And that's something I can't do unless I see her in person but obviously her being closed prevents us from meeting in person (unless its a chance encounter).  But in the past, I've written a letter and e-mail and it worked, so maybe there is a way to not do it in person...", "summary": "Would you take someone back if suddenly the vibe changed for the worst?  As if suddenly you don't know if they like you are not, and have huge doubts about how genuine the other guy is."}
{"id": "t3_25cwip", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26F] boyfriend [26M] got an e-mail from a waitress at a restaurant - should I be uncomfortable with this?", "post": "My boyfriend [26M] and I [26F] have been together for approx. 6 months. Last night, he went out to dinner with his family. I had other commitments, so I couldn't go, but I met up with them after the meal for a couple of drinks and to say hi. When I got there, his family was laughing about how his waitress is an old \"friend\" of his from high school, and told an embarrassing story about how my boyfriend got his mom to buy this girl a thong for him to give her as a gift once. It was a really awkward story.\n\n \nWhen the girl came out, I ordered a drink and she didn't even bring it to me. It peeved me a little, and when we ended up leaving, she apologized to me then pulled my boyfriend aside to give him her e-mail address so they could catch up. This girl is very attractive and the situation is making me a bit uncomfortable. They're such distant friends, he didn't even have her on Facebook. When we got home, he promptly added her and proceeded to creep her profile. \n\nI'm not sure if I should be uncomfortable with this or not. Any advice on how to handle this would be really appreciated. Thanks.", "summary": "Boyfriend got an e-mail from a waitress whose an old fling from several years ago. He fully intends on rebuilding contact with this woman - should I be uncomfortable with it?"}
{"id": "t3_2jz6wz", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "[Serious] How do I rid my self of my insecurities?", "post": "I'm a male, 21, having troubles with myself. I am not sure when I became conscious of my insecurities, but when I did, I realized that most of my current actions and past actions were influenced by my insecurities. Ever since then, I've been conscious about my actions and constantly reason the things I do and things I should/not do. But in the 2 years since I became aware of my condition, I haven't improved much. I'm kind of a loner, don't have much friends. I had a girlfriend 3 years ago, and her breaking up with me was the event that made me aware of my problems. Sometimes I feel this might be because of my background, because I've seen my family show the same anti-social and insecure behavior that I do. But I wish to change that. I wanna be the best version of my self. Not a version that is a manifestation of my insecurities. . . Following are the Insecure behavior that I've identified about myself: 1) jealous 2) lonely( a thing i constantly feel, even in company of people ) 3) self-destructive( at rare times ) 4) cowardly 5) desprate 6) weak self control 7) emotionally fickle 8) tend to over do things A few good things about me: 1) Creative 2) Passionate( but this maybe because of my need to impress) 3) Good problem solving abilities . .", "summary": "I'm highly insecure and its ruining my relationships and my life as a whole. I want to rid my self of them and become the best possible version of me."}
{"id": "t3_hapdy", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "My dog and his case of intussusception", "post": "Not long ago we got a great dane puppy who just recently turned 4 months. Beginning of last week we started noticing that he seemed to be having issues defecating. Was just getting a slight runny crap. Figured he had an upset stomache and waited a day. Next day he was having that issue as well as puking up a meal. After puking the next day we took him in. The vet initially thought it was a GI tract infection and sent us home with some antibiotics and a few others. Told us to come back if he continued to puke. That night.. he puked again.\nTook him back to the vet who ran xrays. Other than being able to tell that his intestines were bloated it didn't show anything actually stuck. We were at a point where they quoted me at $1200 - $1900 to do an exploratory surgery to see what the issue is. We're no rich couple and thats a LOT of money for us but we couldn't let him die. They cut into him at noon yesterday. Ended up being [intussusception] Apparently the intestines fold in on itself like a pirates telescope causing blockage and soon followed by death.\n\nHe seems to be doing well today considering and so far everything seems to be healing fine. Fingers crossed. \n\nI'm now looking at dog insurance and wondering if anyone else has any experience with it? \n\n[Our Baby before](\n\n[Our Baby after](\n\n[Xray 1](\n\n[Xray 2](", "summary": "If your dog starts puking and can't seem to poop anything but a watery crap sludge; get him to the hospital asap."}
{"id": "t3_3gt3ow", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M], severe health problems, starting to feel like I'm running out of time.", "post": "I just turned 28, and I've had a really hard life. As a child, I was sexually, physically and mentally tortured by my mom. As a result, I was diagnosed with severe depression, OCD, PTSD and pretty much the works, which I've been dealing with my whole life. Also have lupus.\n\nI live with my dad who is extremely supportive, and is frankly keeping me alive. I see a therapist, and take 5 different medications. I honestly feel like I haven't made much progress. I don't have a job (therapist says it's not a good idea for me to be working at the moment) and don't have a car (too afraid to drive, and I don't think that'll change ever). I weigh 250 pounds (was 300 at one point), so I'm obese as well. I do get SSI, so I'm covered on health insurance / and some allowance.\n\nI've been playing catch up my entire life, and lately, I've been wanting a relationship with someone. I do have friends (online only), but I also want to date. As far as experience, I haven't held a girl's hand or even had a kiss. I've tried okcupid, and even had a date which I thought went well, until she messaged me later saying I was too fat to find anyone.\n\nWith my situation, how do I get out there and meet people? I know this is a therapist question, but she's been at a loss at what I should do as well. \n\nMy dad insists I'm charming, and have a great personality, but I seriously doubt he'd tell me otherwise.", "summary": "28, horrible health problems, wondering how I can break free and find a relationship. Virgin, no car, no job, live at home, lupus. Need some support and suggestions on what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4m88sa", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[26/F] been dating my bf [27/M] for almost 5 years. Everything is perfect but he still hasn't proposed. What gives?", "post": "So here's the classic \"He won't propose!\" post, but he's my situation in particular:\n\nEverything is great for the most part. We rarely fight, living together has been a breeze, still love each other very much, and financially we are well off. If everything is going so well why hasn't he proposed? We've talked about marriage and he wants to marry me. He's just doesn't take much initiative with it and I feel like I need to push him a little every step of the way or else it will never happen. I guess his stance is like \"everything's good. If it ain't broke don't fix it.\"\n\nI'm getting to that point where I feel we've been together for a long time and I'm not being crazy for wanting this. I KNOW I shouldn't compare myself to other people, but when I see someone get engaged on FB and they've been dating for 2 years, it just bums me out a little.", "summary": "I've been dating my boyfriend for a while and everything is perfect so why isn't he proposing even though he knows that's what I want? Also, am I being too pushy for gently nudging him?"}
{"id": "t3_pck8d", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I tend to get really fixated on topics for days or weeks at a time. Is that weird?", "post": "Hi, Reddit.\nI notice that I frequently (and especially if I'm procrastinating on studying) become fixated on random topics that have nothing to do with any of the classes I'm taking or anything going on in my life at the time.\n\nFor instance, last weekend I read all of North Korea's wikipedia page, tons of opinion articles regarding foreign policy towards it, its similarities to the book Nineteen Eighty-Four, and four different documentaries about it. A month before that, I became obsessed with the It Gets Better Project and spent four hours reading about its history and watching dozens of submitted videos. This morning, Benito Mussolini was the topic of choice.\n\nJust wondering: is this normal or weird? On another one of my information binges, I recall reading that intense but changing interests is supposedly a mark of a gifted child, but I'm not four years old so I don't think that quite applies here. Could it just be a natural offshoot of procrastination, like I'm trying to convince myself I'm learning even if it won't help me pass my classes?\n\nThanks for any answers! Helpful ones, anyway. And funny ones.", "summary": "I frequently and obsessively learn about random topics for kicks and giggles. Occurrences of this have a high correlation with procrastination."}
{"id": "t3_2jkcgj", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Confused about how to get from skinnyfat to toned", "post": "Ok I'm probably going to come across as really ignorant but I'm new to fitness and I've read a lot of conflicting information. \n\nBasically, most of my life I've been skinny fat, usually staying around 130ish at 5'7\" but I've never looked toned or lean and have always felt as though I've needed to lose 10-15 pounds. \n\nIn hs I played tennis a lot and I suppose my legs were toned then but in college I didn't work out at all. Fortunately I also ate less in college so I never really gained weight until recently (that's another story).\n\nMy goal is to finally get a toned beach body but I've heard conflicting advice on how to do this. Basically people are telling me that I shouldn't try to lose anymore weight, but should just gain muscle and this will help me reach my desired goal. \n\nHowever, I think that I should lean up first and lose 10-15 pounds because I definitely have a thick layer of fat covering everything. I doubt I could have visible abs at this point. My goal is basically to get down to 117 pounds (I'm 140.5 now) through cardio and calorie counting (MFP) and then gain 2-3 pounds of muscle to get to 119-120. I'm wondering if this strategy will give me what I want.", "summary": "am skinnyfat and am not sure if I should lose a lot of body fat first and then hit the weight room or just start toning up now"}
{"id": "t3_168lio", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I've already lost interest, what should I do? [x-post from DeadBedrooms]", "post": "I (19/m) was asked out by my current SO (18/f) a little over a month ago and we have been together ever since. I hadn't thought of her as anything other than a friend but she was super cool so I agreed and we hit it off. I was on the fence about how I felt still but we got along so well that I was sure I liked her as more than a friend. We had sex about two weeks into the relationship which we neither of us really expected to happen but we just seemed to click. After a 2 week bedroom haitus because of going home for winter break, we got back together and did our thing. I had high hopes for the encounter since we had talked over the phone about it and were anticipating being together again but afterwards I realized I hadn't been very much into it. Then she came over this past weekend and I had literally no desire to do anything sexual with her. Granted, I was sick so I had an excuse. I was and am fine getting her off, I like to make her happy, but I think that I might not be sexually attracted to her. I'd never thought that this could be an issue in a relationship so I'm not sure what to do. I like her in virtually every other way possible...just not as much sexually. I'm not sure how to approach this since I enjoy all of the other aspects of our relationship. Being friends actually sounds nice now, but...I'm worried she'll just become depressed about it and not be able to handle just being friends. Also, we're in the exact same classes in college, so that doesn't allow for much wiggle room. Also, I just came to this conclusion today, so I'm still hoping that I'm wrong and that I'll become attracted to her again (I was for a few weeks there), any chance of that? Maybe?", "summary": "Had sex a few times, realizing now that I may not be sexually attracted to SO, but still care about her. I don't want things to end badly. Any way out of this? Should I keep trying?"}
{"id": "t3_1yh809", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Dating] When does wanting a relationship mean you aren't ready for one?", "post": "Here's the sitch. \n\nI'm a 19y/o guy, freshman in college, and I want to go on a date with this girl in my class. I have a crush on her, and she seems like a pretty cool person. \n\n**Thing is, I'm a bit cautious of asking this girl out;** **the idea of going out with her excites me too much!** I'm three months out from my first (three month long) relationship, and when I think about asking this girl out, I feel excited. I remember how fantastically awesome my first relationship was, and potentially having those awesome feelings again would be *wonderful*.\n\n**Do I have an unhealthy number of expectations?** I'm worried that I do! I've seen enough of this girl's personality every class to end up liking her, but I've barely interacted with her at all! I'm getting excited over something that doesn't even exist yet! \n\n**Also, I'm pretty certain that I've moved on from my old relationship.** I'm comfortable with who I am. I'm comfortable with being alone. It took a while, but I've finally started genuinely enjoying the single life. I've met new friends, and done new things. I'm enjoying myself! \n\nThis doesn't mean that I've completely forgotten about my last relationship. I remember the feelings I felt everyday. That being said, I mostly just miss being able to make someone I have feelings for happy, and cuddling with someone I have feelings for. It would be great to be able to do those things again, but they aren't something that I need to be happy. \n\nWhat do you guys think? Is it healthy for me to go into a relationship right now? For those of you who went into relationships when you weren't ready-- were you in my shoes? Or, is all of this stuff just normal, and totally fine?", "summary": "I want to go on a date with a girl in my class, but I'm not sure if my excitement over the idea means that I'm not ready for a relationship!"}
{"id": "t3_b4i3o", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I love my mentor (just not the way you're thinking) and it's killing me.", "post": "If I had been posting this a week ago I would've said that I really did love him (in that way). He's been my mentor for over a year now, and he's been helping me through a lot of personal issues. I used to have dreams about him that I thought were \"sexual\", but I've recently been piecing things together and that sexual desire was nothing more than a desire for a hug. He's grown into the father figure I haven't had since I moved out 5 years ago. The only problem is he has his own wife and kids. Taking on a 20 year old \"daughter\" probably isn't going to work for him.\n\nOnce a month we meet up for dinner and go over how things have been going. This month we talked a lot about my self confidence and how willing one should be to do things for others (two years ago I was raped and it's bee fucking up my self confidence ever since). I noticed how happy he was to succeed and how much it hurt him to witness my self destructive behavior. We were talking about a recent success when I told him that the only reason I've been working my ass off lately is for his approval. I also alluded to the fact that there are very few people I trust anymore, and he's probably the only person in the world I'd do anything for.\n\nIt's the truth, but I feel like I'm fucking our mentor/mentee relationship by telling him that. Part of the reason I need his approval so badly/would do anything for him is because I was in love with him, however incorrectly directed, for over a year which is something that should be left out of our relationship at this point. I feel guilty for bringing it up, and part of me thinks I should end our relationship before I cross the line again. I don't even feel like my current love for him is appropriate given his family situation. I'm only complicating his life now.\n\n;", "summary": "I was in love with my mentor, but now I just love him. I accidentally told him about emotions that started when I was in love with him, and now I feel like I've compromised our relationship."}
{"id": "t3_1groph", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Please help. Something has changed and I don't know how to handle it...", "post": "I can't go into too many personal details because he is a Redditor and I don't want to chance that he'll see this. (I doubt he'd go on this subreddit, but I'd rather be safe than sorry).\n\nBasically, we're both in our mid 20's. We've been together for 4.5 years. He has been all I've ever wanted pretty much since we first met about 7 years ago. We have had our fair share of arguments, but we always work them out. However, this past April it was, honest to god, like a light switch went off, and I just don't feel that \"connection\" that I used to. I don't \"care\" enough to try to work out any of the little arguments we have. He hasn't done anything different...I can't explain it at all and it really scares me that one day it's fine, and the next day my feelings are just gone. Since then I've been trying to give it time to see if maybe I'm just going through a sort of \"depression\" phase and maybe this will go away, but it is not getting any better. I don't feel like cuddling or being close any more, and he definitely knows something is up because he's been asking \"why don't you want to cuddle anymore...why don't you love me anymore\" (he's not saying it seriously, almost jokingly, but I can tell he knows something is off). And it kills me because even just the thought of hurting him makes me cry, and part of me doesn't want to leave him because I really do still care about him just as much as I always have.\n\nI wouldn't know where to even start with bringing all of this up to him...(what to say, what my reasoning would be). Does anyone have any suggestions or advice to give? I'm just desperately lost and confused.", "summary": "I feel like I suddenly lost the connection with my boyfriend of 4.5 years. I don't know what to do...if I should wait and see if I can still get it back, or end things now."}
{"id": "t3_urgzv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I didn't shower everyday as a child; What is something you are embarrassed about that you did as a child?", "post": "When I was a baby and little kid, I had very bad eczema all over my body. If you don't know eczema is basically a really bad rash. My skin was so sensitive that giving me a bath irritated it even more. Up until I was about 7 years old, I only had a bath once a week, unless I got dirty and *had* to have a bath. Then, I started to take showers. I would only shower every 3 or 4 days until I was about 11 or 12. I don't remember ever feeling dirty , but I would always lie to my friends and say that I showered everyday. I am still slightly embarrassed by this and it is something that only my close family know about.", "summary": "Had a bad rash when little that made my skin sensitive to taking baths. Didn't shower every day until I was 11/12."}
{"id": "t3_3k6kdx", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Six more weeks of winter", "post": "Hey Runnit. I'm having some trouble and I need a place to vent where people will understand my frustration. I've been out with a stress fracture in my tibia for the last 5 weeks. For the first two weeks I was on crutches, after which time my orthopedist said I could try going without them. I did that, and a few days later I slipped and fell, bashing up my leg and apparently badly re-injuring myself. After that I went back on the crutches, and kept using them until my follow-up appointment today. By all accounts the pain in my leg has gotten worse, and the only thing the doctor said was that we need to treat it more aggressively. This means I have to use the crutches for 4-6 more weeks, and I have to get blood work done to make sure my hormones aren't fucking with my body's ability to fix bones. \n\nDuring this \"recovery\" I was swimming and doing very light biking to keep my fitness up, but now I am forbidden from doing either of those activities. All I can do is sit still or walk around on crutches while I watch the last days of summer drifting by. The air is starting to smell a bit like fall, and I have an insatiable itch to go for a run like I'm back in high school XC. I'm frustrated and angry and I'm going crazy.", "summary": "Stress fracture recovery for 5 weeks. Didn't heal at all, now 6 more weeks off. I just want to run."}
{"id": "t3_34ra4u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [18 M] met a 'girl' [20 F] on tinder who turned out to be a post-op transgender, he's really bothered, it's making him depressed and he's turning to me for advice.", "post": "A down-on-his-luck friend was having trouble 'clicking' with women so I suggested giving tinder a try. A few matches later he comes across this girl, we'll call her Marla, and my friend hits it off with her. 3 dates later they make it official that they're dating. Yesterday, however, my friend had some suspicions about Marla really being a guy. After much speculation he just asks. Marla reveals that she was born a boy and had reassignment surgery. My friend is really bothered by this and it's sent him into a depressed state. He would like to break up with her, but he is torn apart as he really did connect with her, but the trans thing isn't his style. Now he's asking me for advice and what I would do if I were in his shoes. Please give advice, and thank you.", "summary": "Friend met a 'girl' on tinder who was born a guy, this really bothers him and he's asking me for advice."}
{"id": "t3_ucxw2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How is this still such a common problem? (technologically impaired \"experts\")", "post": "I'm appalled by the lack of knowledge that people in consumer electronics and services have.  I remember selling TVs over 10 years ago and one time I was explaining to a customer the difference between AV cables and why he wanted component video for the 1080i flat glass hdtv I was trying to sell him since it was the best picture at the time.\n\nI had another customer interrupt us and correct me that s-video was the best.  I explained the difference between the two and he still argued that s-video was better than component video for an hdtv and he should know, he works for Time Warner and was trained on this.  This went on for 10 minutes.  I wanted to beat my head against a wall.\n\nFast forward a decade to today, and my downstairs neighbor just told me that \"a Time Warner guy fixed his hook up.\"  I asked what he meant cus I already set up his whole home theater myself.  He said the technician replaced his hdmi cables with component video cables because \"hdmi is garbage and component video is the best.\"  *face palm*  It's so messed up now, it'll take me forever to fix it all.\n\nHow is this possible? How are these \"industry experts\" so uneducated?  It's not even like they're just uneducated on brand new technology.  We're talking stuff that's been around for years now.", "summary": "How many people out there aren't getting the most out of their home theater because of dumb cable company workers and store employees?"}
{"id": "t3_vnzpj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Reddit:  How do I stop thinking my guy doesn't love me because he looks at porn and has sexy conversations with other men (hell probably other women too)? Feeling Brainwashed.", "post": "My brain needs unwashing.  I know men look at porn and so do women.  I know we all masturbate.  I know different things get us all off.\n\nI know he loves me very much, but I'm afraid he is going to keep things from me if I tell him I'm over the threesomes and some of the other stuff.  I don't want him to seek out sexy conversations with other men.  Supposedly, he just wants pics of dicks, but if that's true, there are plenty on the internet.\nI know that this is one of those times I should just talk to him about it, but most of us have turned to reddit for a little advice or insight into our issues.  Any thoughts would be appreciated.  If mods feel like this would be better directed to another subreddit please, let me know. Thanks.\n\nAges:27 Me:F Him:M 3.5 years together", "summary": "I need to believe my guy still loves me when he looks at porn and wants to have sexy talk with other men/women."}
{"id": "t3_4fzu0r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (24 M) am afraid my emotional trauma will get in the way of building a romantic relationship with my best friend (20 F).", "post": "This is not easy for me to ask about but I'll try explaining as much as I can. \n\nJust a few days ago one of my best friends and I were hanging out with a group and she started showing signs that she was attracted to me. I've been interested in her for a while, but found myself locking up in a way when I recognized her wanting to get closer to me. I ended up trying to change conversation topics and even stopped talking to her altogether. At the time I was making jokes, but deep down I was (and still am frustrated) that I couldn't just let her get close to me. \n\nThis isn't the first time this has happened. I've had a long history of girlfriends that I've pushed away when they've become too close or have pushed me away, or cheated on me, losing my trust. This of course hasn't helped me build up a good sense of what a healthy relationship is. I can only think of one romantic relationship that was even close to stable. \n\nI know I want a healthy relationship whether it's this girl or someone else but have no idea how to get there. In my latest relationships I've noticed I've been a lot more distant and a lot more willing to end the relationships quickly. I've done this by showing distrust and apathy and later have regretting my expression of those feelings after the girl is gone. Even when I've been intimate with a girl I've felt myself become distant and emotionally detached. \n\nI like this girl a lot and want things to be different if we get together. I want to feel close to her, trust her and give her the healthy relationship that I feel she deserves. I know I don't have to be perfect, but I don't want my tendency to distrust others or shut down on them to get in the way of what I feel we could be.", "summary": "I want to get over my emotional trauma for a girl I like. How do I get over this problem/is it worth it?"}
{"id": "t3_4oh6f2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24F], left my boyfriend [23M], and he began harassing me..", "post": "I'm not going to get into the gritty details, but here's essentially what's going on. He would frequently contact me, sending me awful texts, emails, calls, voicemails... I told him to stop, and he refused; this all occurred after the breakup. I left him.\nI called the cops, and he's been cautioned. I feel so down, so hurt, and lonely. I don't know what to do. Reddit, I have two questions:\nDid I do the right thing? How do I cope with these feelings of the utmost regret?\nI know you guys can be harsh, and I'm not saying filter yourselves for me, I'm just asking that you keep in mind that I am fragile.", "summary": "I broke up with an abusive partner who harassed me, so I called the cops and had them try to put a stop to it. I don't feel happy, though."}
{"id": "t3_21pvuq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "FWB Problems 14 FM", "post": "My FWB has feelings for me and my best friend her ex... she got upset at both of us at the same time because she saw me by myself because I was on my phone and then she got mad/upset and my best friend because he was dancing with a girl... and I'm a millionaire and no one knows but my best friend and we have talked about going out because we like each other and almost inlove with each other and she said it herself we've been together as fwbs for about 4 weeks and best friends for a year", "summary": "My FWB has feelings for my best friend/ex and I'm a millionaire and no one knows and I'm scared she might find out"}
{"id": "t3_1ukbyb", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Need some help.", "post": "So, last July I moved in with my boyfriend... And I had to leave my beautiful 5 year old chocolate lab behind in my hometown with some family. It's killing me to be away from her. We currently live in the basement of someone else's house, and they aren't fussy about having another dog around. We planned on moving out of the house this summer and getting our own apartment.. The thing is, animal friendly apartments are hard to come by around here, and me and my boyfriend both work 7 on 7 off and wouldn't get to see her for a week at a time. Even before I left she was always inside moping, I felt so guilty.\n\nI know she's happy where she is now, always going hunting and playing with other dogs, but due to past experiences (being forced to part with animals I loved, promising to take care of a rescue and being unable to do so) I feel obligated to take her with me.\n\nWhat would you do in my situation?", "summary": "I'm struggling between taking my pet away from the people who are watching her (she loves it there) or keeping her with me in an apartment."}
{"id": "t3_1qnobn", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I want her back, but I don't know what to do.", "post": "Okay, so I had been dating this one girl for a while and she was and still is absolutely amazing and I've yet to question my love for her no matter what. We had a misunderstanding where we both felt like the other was losing interest, so we both pulled away to save our feelings should things get ugly. I know, stupid. Now I thought just communicating would work, but she blamed it on stress and claimed to not want to be extra stress in my life so we broke up.\n\nFast forward a couple of weeks. We text daily and even call for hours. Occasionally she slips up and calls me babe or puts hearts in her texts, immediately followed by \"I'm sorry, Idk why I did that.\" Now I know she's immature, but that doesn't make me love her any less. She's kept all my things and has even checked to make sure I haven't thrown away any notes or gifts she's given me. But every time I approach the subject of getting back together, she says this is for the best. So what do? Is it salvagable?", "summary": "We broke up over something stupid, we both obviously want to get back together, but she thinks this is \"for the best.\" What do?"}
{"id": "t3_4iwwhq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] need help with accepting my [50sM] Dad's new GF.", "post": "So here's back story. My mom passed away almost two years ago and it's just been Dad and I since then.\n\nI'm working on getting out of the house soon but due to issues on both sides I've remained at home the past two years. Also felt very lost considering my Mom was my best friend in the universe.\n\nI knew my Dad would start dating again, I just didn't think it would be so soon. Without hardly any thoughts he has taken her out and said they are officially dating the next day just this past week.\n\nSo Relationships, this is where I come to you. How can I lessen the resentment I feel? I know I cannot compare this wonderful lady to my Mom but it's very difficult... I know she would want dad to be happy and find someone else but I'm not ready for the change. I'm not sure I can ever accept her at this point. \n\nI'm trying really hard to keep in mind that she can't replace my Mom.\n\nHas anyone else gone through this and if so, how did you get used to the new person? Sorry if it seems silly. I just needed somewhere to go with all of it. It's been stressful on me.", "summary": "Lost my mom, dad is back in the dating game with a rather nice lady. Feeling emotions over this new person and need advice on how to accept them."}
{"id": "t3_4gfj7c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Everyone thinks I'm (31M) kind of a dick and it's hurting my relationships.", "post": "Hi guys! I'm more of the quietly reading whats posted kind of guy and not the kind to actually post, so please be patient. lol\n\nWell as the title says most of the people I know personally think I'm a dick, mostly for the way I \"act\". By that they mean the fact that I'm not a very talkative person, The fact that I'm more to the liberal side of things and believe it or not, the fact that I actually went to college.\n\nThis problem has been brought up to me ever since I came back to my hometown after graduating from college a few years back. I live in a pretty small (1000 people more or less), stereotypical cowboy town. Everyone knows everyone and most people that leave do not return, but as I said, I did return... Now, since I went to college I actually found myself there (cliche) and wasn't afraid to be me, I guess I got comfortable with the idea and returned home with the same thoughts. Now everyone makes fun of me for being quieter than most, for my beliefs (I made the mistake of telling people, even tho I just wanted to be courteous and answer the questions), for the fact that I drive a BMW in pickup territory, and as stated before, for studying.\n\nEven childhood friends have turned on me, the only people that stand by me are my parents and my sister who also plans on leaving. I have been insulted, I have been disrespected, I've had lies told about me (the latest one: 620311, the college educated homosexual). I'm at the point that I think I have nothing left for me in my own hometown, I want to pack up and leave, but I don't want to be away from my family. I don't know what to do, guys.", "summary": "People in my small town think I'm a dick for being me and not being like them, I don't know what to do anymore."}
{"id": "t3_1t0i9o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] need serious help with a girl [17F]", "post": "So I was good friends with this girl for about half a year or so and I fell in love with her. Long story short about a week ago I decided to tell her how I felt about her to which she said she does feel like there is something there, but doesn't want to jeopardize our friendship and we should just remain friends.\n\nAt the time I thought that was okay and that I would be fine with that, but as the weeks gone on I've realized that I don't think I can see her as just a friend in my eyes anymore. I'm still crazy in love with her, I know I gotta just let the feelings go but I can't, I don't know how to. Whenever I look at her I see a girl that i'm madly in love with, not just a friend.\n\nI really need some advice or something I don't know what to do, I don't want to lose her as a friend, but I'm also still not over her, I love her too much.", "summary": "Cant see this girl that I used to be good friends with as only friends anymore, but still don't want to lose her as a friend."}
{"id": "t3_4vkrry", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20M] Have a dating problem", "post": "There's girls that are right for me, and treat me well. Although i don't feel the same; I apprieciate the care they give. \n\nI keep having thoughts about, the girl I 'do' want. A Girl i find really attractive and wish i'd date. \n\nTwo issues I have with girls i want to date, and really like.\n\n1: I get let down a lot; the girls I find most attractive make me feel uncomfortable by the way they act. \n\n2: Whenever I get a sign that me and the girl doesn't click, I just give up all patience. \n\nI end up getting mixed emotions, like should i date someone who cares for me but i don't find attractive, or should I date someone based off of attractivness but end up not really liking them as a person either. \n\nI feel like there's really 0% of me meeting someone who fufills, care, personality, attractivity, and sex. \n\nSo if I were to pick a best possible option I feel like i'll just have to live with what I get and not what I want.\n\nI judge people based off 10 minutes of their time; and more often than not I lose my patience on whether I can really 'Like' them. maybe it's the state i live in, that the girls here don't have much to offer and I have looked and met a lot of people. My first love came from a different state. \n\nSo is how i feel wrong? I've learned what I want early, but I lack in know how to look at things, or how to feel about things.", "summary": "I don't know which of my feelings towards dating are justified; and what should the norm. be, or what has been people's best route in looking for a partner."}
{"id": "t3_3wks10", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my step-dad [40], He has a drinking problem and I have no idea how to confront him", "post": "Hi everybody, thanks for reading in advance!\n\nI wanna start by saying I love my step-dad. He's been around almost as long as I can remember, and has raised me and made me who I am now. But I guess that's where the issue comes in.\n\nI believe my step-dad has a drinking problem. The nature of his work means that he never works constant hours, but when he is home and he has the next day off, he drinks himself into a stupor. I've seen him go through 30 packs of beer in just a few days. The thing is, he provides for me and my family financially, so its been difficult to confront him on it.\n\nHe's been confronted before: by my mom [40] because she gave him an ultimatum between going to counseling and working through his issues, or divorce, and they are now divorcing, as my step-dad denied that there are any issues and got angry, as far as I am aware of the situation anyway. As a result, I feel like the last person in the immediate family who gets along with him. However his drinking has always bothered me, and I don't know how to talk to him about it since he pays for a large part of my college and pays entirely for my family's house.\n\nIn addition, even though my parents are divorcing, they have not legally divorced yet, and so they still share finances, health insurance, and the house. To make matters worse, my mom is currently sick and unable to work so when I say he provides for my family, I mean he is providing most if not all of the finances for my family. It's put me in a weird spot and I guess basically I'm looking for ideas on how to confront him about his drinking problem which has bothered me for a long time.", "summary": "Stepdad is a binge drinker, last time he was confronted on it he denied it and got angry, I want to confront him but fear angering him as he provides for me and my family financially"}
{"id": "t3_3c78o2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My aunt [50's, F] is obsessed with sending her son [20's, M] to medical school, but nobody else in the family thinks it's a good idea.", "post": "My aunt has always wanted her son (my cousin) to go to medical school and become a doctor. In her mind, the only path to \"success\" in his life (and her's, I suppose) is for him to become a rich doctor. It is unclear what his father thinks.\n\nHowever, he has already graduated from college and has just finished two years of Teach for America (TFA). He seems to have really enjoyed it, and has gotten a lot of life experience out of it, posting on Facebook and such. We (the rest of the family) think he would make a fine teacher and live a good, happy life as one.\n\nBut his mother won't accept this. He's been putting off the medical school application for years, and now that TFA is over, she's pushing him again. According to his mother, he wants to go to medical school, but we think he is afraid of defying his mother's expectations and desires.\n\nWe may be seeing him this month. If so, we don't want to scare him off or make it seem like a don't-listen-to-your-own-mother intervention. At the same time, going to medical school is a serious decision we think he and his mother might regret.\n\nAnd if we don't see him, we can of course call him. Either way, any advice on how we can handle this situation would be appreciated.", "summary": "My aunt wants to send her son to medical school, but nearly no one else in the family thinks this is a good idea, and it is hard for everyone to see what the son really wants."}
{"id": "t3_24gona", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my ex [21M], he has been ignoring contact with me, am I obligated to drop off his furniture?", "post": "My ex (21M) of eight months has been a general douche to me for the last few months. He broke a NC he initiated (for the second time) while I was visiting my male best friend's family in Texas, and essentially begged me to have a coffee with him later. We hung out a few times and I thought things were good and we were friends again, but then he flipped out again and started ignoring me. He contacted me again after hearing that I was sort-of seeing another guy, acting like we were best friends again, and then recently started ignoring me once more. \n\nHere's the deal. I still have his mattress and box spring from when we lived together, and while he was being nice to me I offered to give him a dresser I'd found and refurbished. My parents are coming this weekend to help me move out, and since he's been ignoring my texts for the past week or so, I'm kind of pissed off. He knows they are coming and we made plans to discuss how I was going to get his stuff to him about a week and a half ago, but has made no effort to contact me about them.\n\nIs it my/my parent's obligation to drop off his mattress? Also, I feel kind of stupid now for offering the dresser. Given his recent doucheliness I don't really want to give it to him. My sister is moving into a new apartment and I would rather she have it. What would be a good way to proceed?", "summary": "Ex is being a douche/ignoring me. I have his bed and offered him a dresser. Is it my obligation to drop these items off for him?"}
{"id": "t3_4wwc4p", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going off trail on a day hike", "post": "I'm an experienced hiker with a lot of time spent in the back country, knowledge of survival skills, navigation, first aid, and outdoor safety. But when you're careless and are overconfident all of that can go out the window, which is the first thing you're taught! Well I was very overconfident and it led to some real problems.\n\nOn a short (6 mile round trip) half day hike on the Appalachian Trail, I went off trail to look at a rock formation about .25 miles away. Instead of turning back to the trail I decided to keep going up and over the mountain through light undergrowth and widely spaced trees. I did not pack a map, nor a compass, and did not have a cell phone signal or GPS device. Nor did I tell anyone where I was hiking that day. BIG MISTAKES.\n\nWhat I thought would be a 10 minute walk that would intersect the trail at the crest of the ridge turned into an over two hour bushwhack through heavy vegetation, but I continued to push forward farther off trail. I got really cut up from vines and thorns and had to rely on the sun and fixed landmarks for navigation. Eventually after descending to a creek, I recalled a map I had looked at earlier which showed a creek crossing the trail about 3 miles into the hike. I ended up following that creek through even more heavy vegetation until I eventually intersected the trail again only about half a mile from where I originally left it. \n\nSo TIFU by abandoning some of the core principles of hiking safety: I was not prepared beyond half a days worth of water. I did not bring a map. I did not bring a compass. I did not tell anyone where I was going. I left a well marked trail. I did not re-trace my steps. I can only hope I did not do any damage to sensitive ecosystems. I got covered in cuts, scrapes, and poison ivy.\n\nAlways be prepared, it's cliche but it is true. Always tell someone where you are, stay on marked trails if they are available or bring a means of navigation if in unmarked terrain, and prepare for the unexpected. Overconfidence can get you seriously hurt or lost.", "summary": "I was not prepared, left a well marked trail, ended up getting lost and scraped up pretty badly out of overconfidence in my abilities."}
{"id": "t3_1m4xsa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[22M] with my girlfriend[22F] of 2 years, she has depression", "post": "Hey everyone,\n\nMy girlfriend has depression and I'm staying positive and being supportive the best I can.\n\nMy work schedule is flexible so I am able to go with her to her therapist and wait in the waiting room with her (calms her down).\n\nShe has a lot of trouble speaking about her problems and just started therapy, and she's let me know the one thing she's most worried about is me leaving her.\n\nI have made it clear that I won't. I love her, and I can see through her illness and see the person she wants to be deep down.\n\nMy concern is: I don't know how to bring up issues with her, without making her retreat into her depressed shell. When I do talk to her, she says I make her feel stupid because I talk down to her.\n\nI want to tell her a few things, like for instance: \n\nYou've only been going to therapy for two sessions, and you don't like talking about your problems, but if you're going to get better you have to continue to go, and learn to talk about your issues.\n\nWe also have 2 cats and pet rats together, and she wanted to get a bunny. I tried my best to bring up the logistics (I'm impartial, I wouldn't mind a bunny and I wouldn't care if we didn't get one), but she basically shut down and cried, saying that she doesn't want it anymore because it wouldn't make her happy.\n\nBasically I was trying my best to be calm and not get her emotional, but she did anyways. I don't blame myself and I don't blame here, but I'm looking for ways to communicate better with her in her situation.", "summary": "My girlfriend is depressed and seeing a therapist. I'm looking for ways to talk to her and suggest solutions without triggering her depression."}
{"id": "t3_3045cs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] of 18 months, we broke up on Friday and yesterday I sent her this text. She also cheated on me in the end.", "post": "Background information: I'm 26. She was my first official girlfriend. We've been together for more than one year, but in the last couple of weeks we didn't put enough energy into the relationship anymore. I expected her to break up with me on Friday when she told me 'I need to tell you something'. Actually she did broke up with me AND then told me that she cheated two weeks ago. This is an actual text I sent her yesterday:\n\nI need to tell you something. This won't be nice for you, but I need to say it. Like you told me that story about Paddy. When I heard about it on Friday, I honestly thought that I can deal with it. My reaction was honest and I meant every word I said. I wasn't even mad at you.\n\nBut since then it hurts more with every day. Yesterday I cried for the first time when I was at my brother's home and just now I did it again at training. It is the first time I am feeling this and it sucks hard.\n\nAnd it was unnecessary. You could have broke up and then fucked whoever you wanted. I didn't need to know then. \n\nAnd it was no random mistake, because you slept with him twice. I know that I am partly to blame for this, too. That is my biggest problem. Had I treated you like you deserve it (Yes, I still think you are awesome), it wouldn't have happened. And you know that this is the actual reason. You just didn't want to tell me that. Therefore sentences like \"it's not your fault, it's mine\" are simply clich\u00e9. \n\nI don't hate you. Far from it. I miss you every day, even though I hate to admit it. But all those things I didn't tell you on Friday, so I had to do it now. That you cheated on me, did hurt me and it sucks.", "summary": "We broke up on Friday, I saw it coming. What I didn't see coming was that she cheated on me 2 weeks ago. I thought I could handle it, but it takes more energy than I expected."}
{"id": "t3_d6d81", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "GF won't have sex anymore..hurting our relationship", "post": "I'm 25, shes 24. We've been dating for almost 2 years this November. I work 9 to 5 and she works as a server a couple nights a week. \n\nThe beginning of this year, her father passed away. Its been 8 months now, but it has really put her in a bad place. Since then, we've had a hard time getting intimate.\n\nFast forward to today. Every time i try to get physical past kissing, she gets turned off or just doesn't reciprocate. I try being romantic (wine, dinner, talking, fun events, etc) but when it comes down to it, she'd rather sleep. It seems she's always too tired. I work 9-10 hour days at times and STILL take my ass to the gym and have more energy than her.\n\nI love her to death, but if our sex life is this bad now, what am I supposed to expect if we get married? Our sex life was 10x better in the beginning of our relationship.\n\nFor those that think she may be cheating: I'm 99.9% sure she is not. She's been cheated on twice and it's screwed her up some. She'd rather break up with me than cheat.", "summary": "GF wont have sex. She's always tired and doesn't ever show any sexual physical attention towards me anymore. What the shit should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_45ui1z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I (21 M) stay with my SO (21 M) and try to help/wait out our problems or get out of the relationship?", "post": "So my significant other and I are in a rut. We're both in college together, been living together since freshman year, dating for 2 years and 8 months.\n\nWe only fight about how he does not like to approach other people or go out. I usually find myself wanting to go out with other friends but I feel really guilty leaving him alone back at our dorm all by himself. He's smart, kind, and really a great guy but its been almost three years and I see no improvement from him to try and make friends and its really hurting our relationship. He's terrified and shy so he has trouble talking to others and I've tried helping him but he keeps resisting. He has no friend group and no close friends at all.\n\nLately another problem of support has been an issue in where I get in a debate about something trivial and he does not support me in the least and usually just \"tries to stay out of it\". I understand if I'm wrong he has no reason to support me but to not want to support me bothers me. I'm trying not to sound spoiled but please give me advice.\n\nDo I stay and hope he becomes more social and has a friend group? Do I leave and hope he turns out okay? I love him and I want him to become a greater person (I think we can all improve) but its been such a strain on me.", "summary": "been dating SO for three years. He has problems making friends, no close friends or a friend group. I love him but tired of not being able to go out without him. Do I leave or help."}
{"id": "t3_22z742", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[27/M] A Frustrating pattern in my dating life - After the third or fourth date, women completely sever all contact with me, despite signs that everything is going really well.", "post": "This keeps happening to me: I meet a woman, we go on three or four dates, everything seems to be going really great, and then she completely stops talking to me.\n\nThis has happened 4 times in a row with 4 different women I've seen over the past six months. Things are going really well, we have a great time when we go out, she seems really into it - and then out of nowhere, COMPLETELY severs all contact. No explanation, seemingly at random. There doesn't appear to be a triggering event, we can go from planning our next date to utter radio silence at the drop of a hat. I've been on my fair share of bad dates, and these were not bad dates.\n\nOther than this pattern, nothing is really that similar between the women. They're a variety of ages, personality types, and even races. Some of them I've slept with on the second or third date. Some I haven't. All of them I've at least made out with, at least one of them initiated making out with me, in a pub while playing darts no less. It's pretty clear that they're interested in me.\n\nI generally consider myself pretty good at picking up on social cues, body language, etc. I can take the hint when someone doesn't want to talk to me. I usually use the rule of two missed texts and one missed call before I give up trying to maintain contact. I'm very much not a needy or smothering person, I respect distance and personal space, especially at the beginning of a relationship.\n\nI really like these girls, and I get the feeling that they like me. Could I be doing something wrong? Is this some sort of test to see if I'll keep pursuing them? I have a pretty thick shell, but it hurts more and more each time this happens, and it's very discouraging to stay in the dating game. It is 100% fine if you don't want to continue dating, but to shut me out and straight up ignore me? Do I not even deserve an explanation?", "summary": "After the third or fourth date, women sever all contact with me, despite signs that everything is going really well. Is it something I'm doing wrong? How can I handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_1uczkf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend (M22) and I (F22) split up for a few months now are back together, do we started counting months over?", "post": "My boyfriend and I were together for two years, then both got trial jobs on opposite sides of the country.  We went our separate ways for a few months now we're both home and we are back together for the long haul. \n\nWe were both single for about four months, but we did keep in touch.  Now we're unsure of whether or not to start over (saying we just started dating, i.e. this is month one) or to continue from where we were before (say we've been together for over 2 years).\n\nIn the grand scheme of things it's not a big deal but we were just wondering what to do.", "summary": "Should my boyfriend and I say we just started dating or should we say we've been together for over 2 years although we were apart for a few months?"}
{"id": "t3_1vkksx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[F22] boyfriend[M24] made me terrible for getting upset about a barking dog.", "post": "Ugh so the title is supposed to say My boyfriend made me FEEL terrible...\n\nA few days ago the dog in the apartment below mine started barking/howling/whining non stop for over an hour. The walls are paper thin and eventually I got tired of it. I don't know any of the people there but happened to know the name of one guy who did live there so I emailed him saying the dog had been making noise non stop please do something about it (I knew that no one was home at that point).\n\nAt first he made it sound like he wasn't going to be doing anything about it but then I guess he was just about to get out of class and was coming home. The whole convo could pretty much be summed up as me asking him to do something about the dog, him saying \"it's barking because it's lonely\", me repeating \"please deal with the dog\" (idc why it's barking I just want it to stop(didn't say this to him)) and him saying \"okay I'm on my way back anyway\"...So the whole situation with the dog was solved pretty quickly.\n\nI showed my boyfriend the message exchange and he said I embarrassed him. Basically what he said is that it embarrases him that I got upset over a barking dog. I was polite during the conversation with the other person so it's not that. It's just the fact that I would get upset over noise. I mentioned something about making a noise complaint if it didn't stop (to my boyfriend, not to the dog owner) and he acted like I was the biggest bitch ever.\n\nI just feel like I can never complain or get upset about anything around him because he acts like I'm a big whiny bitch. It hurts my feelings. I don't want to have to deal with more nights of getting 3 hours of sleep because neighbors are playing music all night or have to try to deal with migraine headaches while listening to a dog bark. He would just rather \"ignore\" problems like these when I'm the type of person who will comfront the people causing the problem. I don't know what to do in these situations now... sorry if this is rambling. We've been dating for 8 months.", "summary": "Boyfriend got upset with me when I complained about a barking dog. He makes me feel like a whiney bitch whenever I complain about things that I feel are justified. Anyone been in a relationship like this?"}
{"id": "t3_g375v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "break up with current gf of 3 months for new girl fresh out of a LTR that ive had a crush on for over a year?", "post": "I've been dating my current gf for 3 months.. she's an awesome girlfriend. Cooks cleans etc without me even asking.. sweetest person ever, nonjudgmental, i'm completely comfortable around her. I didn't really have to work for her though, we just started hooking up after meeting at a cpl of parties and she asked me out basically.\n\nThis other girl is someone ive had a huge crush on for about a year, we've always been great friends.. long heart-to-hearts and talks about religion, life, the future etc. We ended up not talking much over the past cpl of months, as we both have busy lives, and she was in a very serious relationship with a bf of 3 yrs. We ran into each other at teh bar a couple of weeks ago and she told me she broke up with him a couple of days after valentines day (ouch). I know shes already rebounded (we covered that) and last night in a drunk text convo, we both admitted to liking each other. This other girl is gorgeous and a lot of guys are constantly trying to get with her. If she had dumped her bf about 3 months earlier, i for sure would have tried to make a move on her.. \n\nTwo areas i want to point out that im aware of:\n1. I know i am a douchebag for even thinking this, and the fact that i'm this far along in the thought process is indicative of me not taking this relationship too seriously. \n2. I tried my best to not be the emotional crutch, and that also factored into us not talking over the past couple of months.\n\nMy question is, what do i do now?", "summary": "should i dump current sweet gf and comfortable relationship for new hot girl thats fresh out of a LTR n ive had a huge crush on for a while but will have to work hard to keep/attain?"}
{"id": "t3_3vlkq6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my 26 [M] boyfriend of a couple months, would like some feedback on a recent situation", "post": "Hey reddit, just wanted to know your opinions on just how transparent it is appropriate to be with your partner. \n\nSo I've been in a relationship for several months now, and things are going beautifully. I love this man and can truly see myself with him in the future. We each have our friend groups and enjoy going out with our respective groups without the other person every once in a while. Well, yesterday another guy in my friend group confessed his love to me. He told me he's loved me for a while now and that, even though he knows I'm in a happy relationship, he just wanted me to know because he had to get it off his chest. He also acknowledged that it was terrible timing and that he does not expect anything to come of it. \n\nMy question to you guys is, do you tell your partners when other people express their attraction to you? It's happened to me a couple times already, with coworkers or acquaintances, where they'll tell me they like me. It's not so much that I feel the need to hide things from my partner, I just honestly don't know if this is something that has to be said every time it happens because it feels like i'm essentially saying \"look at all these guys that want me besides you!\" Even though i'd be very careful in the way i say it, it just seems like it doesn't do anything other than sound like i'm bragging and possibly make him paranoid. Even now it fees weird typing this out because I can't help but feel like others will perceive me as flipping my hair thinking I'm hot shit as I talk about how \"everyone totally wants me.\" Right now i'm leaning towards telling him because we've always been honest and open to each other about everything, but is it really necessary to tell each other about stuff like this every time it happens? \n\nBy the way, my boyfriend knows of this other guy by name but they haven't really hung out before.", "summary": "Someone else is crushing on me, i'm in a happy relationship and don't really feel anything for the other person. Want to know if I should tell my boyfriend every time someone confesses their attraction to me."}
{"id": "t3_4ekgl7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my ex girlfriend [19 F] went out for 2 years and broke up over long distance. I still love her what should I do.", "post": "We broke up as we live apart then we spoke for a little bit but we ended up fighting and we no longer speak. I have a letter I want to give her to try get back together with her. I asked her friends for her address so I could send it to her but they think it's best for her not to hear from me as I bring up bad memories. I cannot message her myself as she has blocked me on all social media. \n\nI really still love her and I think there could be a slim chance that we could get back together, we've been apart for about 2 months now. Should I still try to somehow get this letter to her or just leave it, it sucks right now because she's always on my mind.", "summary": "Do I try get my girlfriend back after her friends have told me its best for her not to speak to me at all."}
{"id": "t3_27kvob", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [28/M] and I [25/F] got high and hit each other. Now he won't speak to me.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years now. We had a great relationship until about 3 days ago. We got high together because we were bored and decided it would be fun. (We've gotten high before btw). We got a bit carried away and realised that we could hardly feel pain, one thing lead to another and we started hitting, slapping and punching each other across the face and on the arms, laughing whilst we were doing it. We both had some pretty deep purple bruises and a few bloody cuts. The next day I woke up and he was out the apartment (we share together), so I called him and he told me he's feels weird and uncomfortable around me and needs space away for a few days. I'm so confused because I don't understand why he feels this way. Is he scared I'll tell someone we beat each other? I wouldn't dare! Please, any advice would be great!", "summary": "Basically my boyfriend and I got high, beat each other because we thought it was hilarious and now he is avoiding me and I don't know why."}
{"id": "t3_eq01v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Family in serious financial troubles, still using money on Christmas.  Advice on how to help them/convince them not to spend money?", "post": "I don't have any idea what to do about/for my parents.  Here's the deal; Both of my parents are disabled (Step-Father due to spinal injury, Mother due to surgery complications) and live with my younger sister (13) and my Grandmother (82).  This past month the food stamps they were on got cut to 90 dollars a month (from 300).  Their only income is from my Grandmothers pension, their disability and whatever at-home work any of them are able to do.  However, this Christmas my Step-dad recieved some money from his previous work, but my family used it all on Christmas.  Then I find out from my Mother that a family in worse shape near them could not afford Christmas this year, so they gathered together a lot of stuff and used some of their budgeted food money to bring them Christmas.\n\nI understand that the Holidays are important and I even to an extent support what they're doing, but I have a horrible feeling it's killing their finances.  I don't have the heart to tell my Mother this.  \n\nI'm 23 and putting myself through college and simply can't afford to help out as much as I can all the time, so I need some advice as to what to do for them for this Holiday season.  I just feel like getting everyone random presents isn't going to cut it.  I also don't know how to express to them that having a big heart is wonderful, but not when it may be hurting your own family.  :/  Advice?", "summary": "Family has bad finances, uses what little they have for Christmas, need advice on how to get them to save money and on what to do for them for Christmas."}
{"id": "t3_ok6c5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, What ridiculous dares or bets have you gotten your self involved in for the sake of money or \"balls\".", "post": "A few years ago a work mate was complaining about packaging waste in the office, Being my usual sarcastic self I suggested he eat the box, in a effort to use intentionally abstract logic to rationalize him eating it , I said for the right amount of money I would eat it, He started shouting numbers at me trying to find my price and after some co-workers overheard our discussion I ended up eating a a [corrugated card board box] similar to that image for 1,000 Euro.\n\nThey did not stipulate the way in which to eat it , but they did say I had to finish it before the work day was over, I cut it into small chunks and softened it with boiling water and a small amount of sugar to make it less bland, I completed the bet but I didn't shit right for a good while.", "summary": "ate a box for 1,000 (1,500$ at the time) what ridiculous thing have you done for money or a dare?"}
{"id": "t3_43w7kx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17/m] recently broke up with my [17/f] girlfriend. I regret my action deeply and want her back. We've been together for almost 2 years.", "post": "I just couldn't stand her being so cold hearted to me during the holidays. I really wanted to meet her during holidays as it was around christmas but she refused to meet me because those are family days for her and she doesn't want that to interfere with me. so I'll make it short and say that I eventually broke up with her because she was not treating me as I wanted to be treated. right now I really regret my decision and for several weeks I can't do anything but think about her and it's driving me crazy. all the good things that happened between us, all the positive experiences just everything came back to me. \n\nI'm not really a person that talks about feelings face to face so I decided to write her a letter and tell her that I still love her, that I was sorry for my past behaviours and want to be together with her again. I am actually willing to talk with her face to face because obviously a letter is not enough but right now she doesn't even want to talk about talking these things. \n\nI'm seeing her everyday as we have 50% of our classes at school together and we're not really treating each other very well as ignoring each other or being unfriendly and things like that. \n\nthe thing is she once texted me that she also loves me, that she is also missing me and I thought that if I tell her about my feelings she might want to be together with me again and might be willing to forgive me. \n\nI'm just really confused right now, I don't even know if I really love her but I just can't stop thinking about her and all the memories I had with her. is there anyone who was experienced something similar? could you guys give me some advice as to what to do right now? thanks in advance.", "summary": "broke up with my girlfriend and regret my decision right now even though I don't really know what I am truly feeling. looking for advice as to what to do right now."}
{"id": "t3_54y2mk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] went on a first date with [25F] this weekend and haven't heard from her, now says she's too busy to date.", "post": "So I meet this girl on OKC and we chatted for about 2 weeks before I asked her out.\n\nWe went out for drinks and ate brunch the next day where we also kissed. We agreed we could have another date this coming monday.\n\nAfter getting home I sent her a cute message about what a great time I had and I never heard from her. Before this we messaged all the time. So, I again texted Monday (her bday) and never heard back.\n\nCome to today I messaged her again asked her how she was and if we were still on for Sunday and she said school is too busy and she can't and wasn't interested in setting something else up. I guess I'm a little hurt, and a little heartbroken. I went ahead and deleted her from my social media and such, but now I'm wondering if I am over reacting or if it is right to just cut my losses.\n\nIt should be noted I haven't been on a date since last January, I thought this girl was amazing, and being a lesbian in a not so gay friendly area finding one is like finding a unicorn. I should say there were some red flags before this, and during the date. Have any of you been in a similar situation? Where do I go from here? Did I over react by cutting my losses?", "summary": "Met amazing girl online, went on a great date, now never wants to see me. How do I go from here?"}
{"id": "t3_nhdzc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the most ridiculous irrational fear you have heard of someone having?", "post": "I ask this because of a recent visit I had with my grandmother. While I was visiting, her aunt (my great-great aunt, but only slightly older than my grandma) also swung by for a bit. Now her aunt has a few screws loose upstairs, so I've heard some pretty wild stuff from her before, but what she said that day tops everything.\n\nShe was terrified to see the bird feeders in my grandma's backyard. When we asked why, her aunt explained that with all the birds around my grandma's property, she thought that one might pick up a lit cigarette a motorist had thrown out on the street, fly up, and deposit it down the chimney, thus setting the house on fire.\n\nApart from not trying to explode in laughter, I tried reasoning with her that even if a bird picked up a particularly smelly object like a cigarette, and of all places, somehow put it down the chimney (even with the metal cage above it to keep rain/debris out), it wouldn't do anything since that chimney leads to a natural gas furnace, which by all means wouldn't combust from such a thing. She was still livid about taking the feeders down.", "summary": "great-great aunt was afraid of birdfeeders, as the consequences of owning one would lead to a housefire, per her deranged logic."}
{"id": "t3_3akdb6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] boyfriend [20] refuses to talk to me and has been ignoring me since last night", "post": "I don't know what his problem is. He's been ignoring me since last night before he went to sleep. He woke up for a bit in the middle of the night to eat. I tried to talk to him but he was pissed at me. This morning I asked him what his problem was, if I ever did anything, he denied there was any problem but still continues to ignore me. I am so frustrated right now. We live together and we've been a couple for almost 2 years now. We usually never have issues or argue, we're a happy couple. I wish he would just tell me. I'm. So. Annoyed.\n\nWhat should I do? Should I talk to him until he blurts it out? Or should I also ignore him?", "summary": "BF won't talk to me, tells me I didn't do anything when I try to confront him but continues to ignore me and give me the cold shoulder"}
{"id": "t3_35plz7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [27/M] deal with jealousy about ex's [25/M] new life?", "post": "And I'm back.\n\nHere's the original post: \n\nFor those of you (like me) who don't want to read all of that, the long and short of it is that the ex and I dated for over a year and a half (lived together for over half of that). He broke up with me for someone else in October 2014 after I moved to a different state for work. We reconciled briefly (~3 weeks) back in early January, and it ended because he cheated on me twice with the guy he initially left me for, and they're still together. During our period of reconciliation, I learned that the guy cheated on my ex non-stop for the 2 months they were first together (think anonymous sex ads on craigslist).\n\nSince then I found out that they have moved in together in a bougie apartment in the city that I've been trying to get to for years. Despite the book I could write on why this is probably the best for me, I still find myself wrought with feelings of jealousy that I cannot shake. They're living the life that I've been working toward for years -- the life that he and I had been planning for so long. And for them it just happened over night. I am stuck in a midsize southern city until the fall, at which point I don't know where I'll be heading. And it's not just that they moved in together -- it's that they moved in together in the city I've always wanted to live and settle down in. And it kills me.\n\nIt's been over 6 months now, and I still feel absolutely stuck, no matter how hard I try to move on. How do I overcome these feelings of bitter jealousy? Are there reasons I shouldn't be jealous? Is this normal? Any help is appreciated.", "summary": "Ex is with the guy he cheated on me with and just moved in together in my dream city.  How do I get over feeling jealous?"}
{"id": "t3_30k496", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "When asked about salary expectations during my interview I said 38k to 45k. Was just offered the position with 38k. Should I try and negotiate?", "post": "So I interviewed for a position last week, and before the interview I saw online that the industry average for this position was $41,000. During the interview, they asked me my salary expectations, I said between $38,000 and $45,000 hoping it'd land somewhere in the middle. I received my offer today, and it was for $38,000. I can't help but wonder if I had just said $41,000 they probably would've offered it...\n\nAnyways, so what I know is they are hiring 3 other people for this same position... I either got lucky and guessed exactly what salary they were planning on paying all of us to begin with, or we're all getting paid differently. As for the job, it is the ideal entry level position for me right now, and is a great company with benefits etc so I actually wouldn't mind working there for the 38k salary.\n\nBut it would be nice to get an even 40 at least, so my question is, is it common practice to negotiate salary after receiving an offer already? I also must say that I don't have any leverage as this is entry level and I would have probably still accepted had the offer been even as low as 30k. As such, I'm very afraid the offer may be retracted if I do try and negotiate, if that sort of thing happens?", "summary": "Said 38k to 45k salary expectation during interview, was offered 38k. Have no leverage, and overall its a great entry level position and company. Should I negotiate?"}
{"id": "t3_12ymrz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, have you ever found that \"missed  connection\"? AKA, a person you thought was funny/ attractive that you didn't get any personal  information of?", "post": "(19/m)\nWe partied at my place for Halloween, and there were lots of guys and gals.\n\n(I realize this isn't that long ago, btw)\n\nThere was a girl dressed as a ghost-buster and golly, was she fucking hot.\n\nI immediately told the DJ to play the theme song, and nodded her over to dance with me. She obliged, and we danced long past the song playing. I stopped to get us drinks, I came back, and she was gone. Someone said she left with her friends, and I was bummed she didn't find me before leaving. But fuck me for not asking her name or anything in the first place, right?\n\nSkip forward to yesterday morning in the library.\n\nI see a gorgeous girl working at a computer (probably on reddit, or pinterest for all I fucking know). But she was the fucking girl from the party. I started talking to her, and turns out she was trying to find me before she left, but her friend was being a cock blocking bitch and said that they \"had to leave:\" I guess no one was flirting with her? But who gives a shit, I found the hot ghost busting chick. I'm taking that bitch to sushi. Bitches love sushi <3", "summary": "was dancing with girl at party, she left. no sort of contact info exchanged. saw her today in library, now going on date. <3"}
{"id": "t3_46fgu4", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Dizzy for seemingly no reason? (2nd day)", "post": "* Age: 20\n* Sex: (trans) male\n* Height: 1.76m\n* Weight: 65kg\n* Race: Caucasian\n* Duration of complaint: 2nd day\n* Current medications (if any): Testosterone gel (daily), Vitamine D supplements (weekly)\n\nHad (yet another!) damn cold recently, but it's almost gone now. Yesterday it was a bit worse, and I was also feeling dizzy all of yesterday. From the moment I tilted my head in the morning while getting up, until I went to bed, too much movement made my head feel dizzy. My nose was BARELY stuffy, my throat entirely okay. No headache. I ended up lying down, watching stuff and felt a bit better.\n\nToday I started off feeling pretty good, went to the store to buy groceries, showered, made food and ate, sat in front of the PC for a while... but the moment I try to go back to studying for upcoming exams (which I did the day prior as well), the up and down motion of taking notes makes me feel dizzy again.\n\nI drank more than I usually do yesterday for that reason, ate well; lots of fruits and vegetables and whole meals. Been doing the same today.\n\nI've never felt dizzy from a cold, especially not when it was such a light one. I generally never feel dizzy - if I'm dehydrated, I generally get a headache from it first thing, and I drank so much I can't imagine it. I didn't exactly exercise loads these days, but I don't just sit around either. And it's not any different from my regular schedule.\n\nI'd just sleep it off but with the exams upcoming it's becoming a bit of a problem if I have to skip more and more days, but the dizziness is just too annoying after a while. Is there anything I'm missing? Am I still not drinking enough? (Going to the bathroom every half hour gets annoying after a while) Should I move more regardless? (I'd go outside more but I loathe the cold)", "summary": "drank well, ate well, moved moderately; no headache, no pain, but dizziness from moving head. No fever"}
{"id": "t3_33wy3a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my girlfriend [20 F] of about a year, help me try to understand the breakup", "post": "My girlfriend broke up with me about 5 months ago over the phone. I'm almost though the \"healing process\" but I have a question that is bugging me.\n\nShe really confused me by telling me that she \"loved me but she didn't have time to see me at the moment\". I now realize that was probably some sort of bullshit excuse. If you want to see some one, it's quite easy to make time, right?\n\nWe lived in different cities and when she called me to end I thought about driving over (2 or 3 hours drive) and telling her how I felt about her and that I didn't want her to end it.\n\nWould this have made any difference or would I have had to accepted it was over regardless?", "summary": "Long distance girlfriend broke it off, would showing up and telling her how I felt about her change anything on the day?"}
{"id": "t3_46y8vn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (24M) just found out that my ex (23F) has been going out with a guy for 2 months, and was dating him before then. We broke up 4 months ago after 3.5 years. I feel angry, but should I feel betrayed too?", "post": "I'm moving away in a weeks time and she just came over and dropped that on me. I had my suspicions that something was going on, but to find out that she was going out with someone else so soon has reopened all of the wounds.\n\nI believe that she went on a date with him the night that she ended it with me, and I'm hurt that she has brought it up now that I'm about to move to a different part of the country. I have no plans to ever get back together again, but I don't know whether I should consider letting this go.", "summary": "I think that my ex dumped me and went straight to a date with someone else, and I don't know how to deal with this new knowledge."}
{"id": "t3_2onkgn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is this girl (20f) just messing with my (20m) head ?", "post": "So this girl Ive been hanging out with is beautiful, but shes so wierd, we were drinking one day and we ended up hooking up and I ate her out, I tried to have sex but she didn't let me (we were outside when all this happened) and then we hooked up again the day after that , but then she told me that it was over with us messing\n\nWe went back to chilling and then saturday night I was giving her a massage in my car and then in the moment I went under her shirt and started rubbing her back, I went lower and then start moving my hands towards her breasts and then grabbed them and she let me, I started gently feeling them and she started moaning lightly and then I was slowly moving my hand up her leg and she just grabs my hand and says \"just put it there already\" and I start rubbing her pussy through her sweats, she starts moaning in my ear and almost kisses me, I tried to go further but she stopped it and then I took her home\n\nWe hang out a lot, and get along REALLY well but there's always these wierd moments at times because it gets quiet and we just look at eachother and I dont know to make a move or not , we were smoking in my car last night and I tried to give her a massage, she said no, I tried to feel her leg and she said not to, whats this girls deal ? Should I just stop trying ? She lets me feel her everywhere one day and wont let me touch her at all the next, any girls out there got any advice on what to do ? I never tried to kiss her, I always just went for her legs or ass or breasts, because I dont know if she would turn down the kiss, im just completely confused with her.", "summary": "Girl ive hooked up with and hang with a lot lets me do things to her one day and doesnt let me touch her the next, its confusing as hell"}
{"id": "t3_165ss0", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/f] Why does the thought of this guy (24/m) make me nauseous?", "post": "-I [21/f] used to work with this guy (24/m - let's call him Guy) at an on-campus job in college. I always enjoyed working with Guy, but never considered him as datable because I had a boyfriend up until a little over a year ago. \n\n-Guy graduated a couple years ago; I am a senior in college. I'd see Guy here and there at parties after he graduated, but we had never hung out one-on-one until...\n\n-A coworker and I were reminiscing about the good times with Guy, so I texted him to see how he was doing. Guy invited me out to drinks the next week. I figured it was just gonna be catching up, but it ended up being very date-like. I had an awesome time.\n\n-Guy asked me to lunch this past Saturday. Texting him beforehand made me feel physically nauseous to the point that I almost cancelled the date. But I didn't. I went and had an awesome time. Again.\n\n-He has implied future dates.\n\n-Multiple people have told me that Guy has had a thing for me for a while.\n\n-We haven't done anything physical, with the exception of hugging. I don't find him physically stunning, but I don't think it's a deal breaker. \n\n-Guy makes me laugh, and I feel we connect on a lot of things. These past couple times we've hung out, I've even felt somewhat romantically about Guy. I genuinely want to hang out with him more. \n\nBUT HERE'S THE THING:\nI don't like texting this guy or even thinking about him outside of when we hang out because it makes me feel nauseous. My stomach is churning as I type this out. What is wrong with me?", "summary": "I've REALLY enjoyed the few dates I've had with this guy, but any thought of him I have when he's not around makes me feel physically nauseous."}
{"id": "t3_2fnrrh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend, (28F) single mom, is getting stressed because she has too little alone time, but she has a hard time accepting help when I (28M) offer to watch her kids etc to give her that time. What can I do/say?", "post": "We have been dating for two and a half months, but we were friends in high school. We are both divorced, but her kids' dad takes them maybe one day a week. By their bedtime she's too tired to stay up for time for herself. I have more free time because I only have my kids for half the time. \n\nWhat can I say to her to help her get over the mentality she has to take care of all her problems alone? I'm willing to invest whatever it takes because we get along so well. Ask me any info that I may have left out.", "summary": "GF doesn't have enough alone time but as a single mom, has a hard time accepting help to give it to her."}
{"id": "t3_1ok0zc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M 26] went to my friend's [M 29] wedding and left early over a personal issue. Now his wife [F 25-ish] says I'm a liar. Wat do?", "post": "Well, there's obviously a bit of a story here, so let's make it easy. My best friend, let's call him Bill, got married to the love of his life, let's call her Anna. Bill asked me to be one of the groomsmen, and obviously I accepted, went to the rehearsal, did my best not to let him down, but it turns out I did anyways. One of Anna's bridesmaids, let's call her Sam, decided she took a shine to one of the other groomsmen. But, she decided to come visit me two days before the wedding, at night, at my place, which is about an hour from where everyone else lives. Sam asked me to keep it secret, so I did, didn't ask why. Flash forward two days to the wedding, I find out now that, yes, Sam likes the other guy, and isn't looking for a relationship (which I was and still am), but as far as I knew, she'd shown that she liked me. So I made a pretty believable excuse about how I was tired (I'd been driving back and forth about an hour each way pretty steadily for the past three days) and left at the reception. Yes, I know it was horribly wrong, but I was a bit upset, and didn't want to cause a scene or anything. Flash forward to today, Anna accuses me of lying, so I tell her the truth and apologize. Then comes the fun part: I tell Anna about Sam's visit and all hell breaks loose. Now I'm the bad guy because Sam swears up and down that she doesn't even know where I live, and Anna, for some reason, trusts her more than me, even though I've been friends with Bill for over a decade, and until now, we'd all have taken bullets for each other. I'm very hurt and confused on why Sam would lie about visiting me, why Anna believes her more, and how this is going to affect my friendship with Bill.", "summary": "One woman is breaking up over a decade of friendship for me and I don't get why she'd do such a thing, or how to fix it. Tried logic and reason, and nothing worked. Wat do? "}
{"id": "t3_1avay4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28M] Have Made It Very Clear With A Girl [25F] That I'm Not Looking For Anything Serious...", "post": "So I [28M] have been hooking up with this girl[25F] I've know for a few months now, and have made it very clear from the beginning that I am not looking for anything serious at all and not looking to date exclusively right now.  Strictly a friends with benefits.\n\nWhen we first started hooking up, she was closely integrated with my group of friends, and when I learned she might have feelings, I stopped and told her that I wasn't looking for anything serious.  She said she's totally cool with that and is fine hooking up, which we did.\n\nThe problem is, I'm not so sure she is totally cool with that regardless of what she says.  Since she's part of my group of friends, we often all go out together, and I can see she gets a bit jealous if I'm looking at another girl, and I can't bring myself to move forward with any girl.  \n\nI'm not really sure what to do, on one hand I feel like she's an adult and I've done my part of making my intentions clear from the start... on the other I don't want her to get more attached.  I feel like I'm playing with fire, any advice?", "summary": "Hooking up with girl, I think she wants more even though I've been clear about not from the beginning.  Don't know how to proceed"}
{"id": "t3_2v0okk", "subreddit": "Cooking", "title": "(Question) Making a meal for a picky eater", "post": "For valentine's I plan on making a homemade meal for my girlfriend(18) yet the problem is that she has a very fine selection of what she eats. In the time we have been together, almost two years, she has only ever eaten chicken(fried and boneless, pretty much chicken tenders), peanut butter, french fries(not the steak fries) plain bread and cheese and plain butter noodles. She also hates sauces aling with beef and pork, though I don't think shes ever had either. Any type of sauce she will not eat as well. \n\n-side note- she did try pesto sauce once and didn't hate it. Victory!\n\nUsually when we go out she'll order off the kids menu because she knows the adult portions have things added that she would not like. \n\nI on the other, I hand love savory food. I love sauces and spice and some heat in my food. I love seafood and meats. Cheeses and good espresso. I am under 21 so no wine yet. Yet I am also a southerner so fried chicken, cornbread, sweet tea and collards run through my veins. \n\nAny advice for a meal that would suit her needs and mine? I would go out to eat but I feel like that is not as fun as making something special. \n\nWhat is a good meal that would be fresh and tasty for both of us?", "summary": "My girlfriend typically orders off the kids menu when we eat out and I want to make something special that is not from a box."}
{"id": "t3_1r3g9p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [20F] not sure if I should introduce my girlfriend to my parents yet.", "post": "We've known each other for maybe a month and a half, have been dating for about a month and just became official a few days ago. Even though she's only been my girlfriend for a few days, it may as well have been for a few weeks (both too shy to make it official). She often sleeps over at my place, we've had sex, and we spend a ton of time together. Things are going very well.\n\nMy parents know about her and are 100% accepting of my sexual orientation and I'm sure they'll love her. They've been very good to other girls that I've introduced them to as well. They ask a lot of questions but I don't think they'll be too intimidating. However, her parents are *not* accepting at all and I'm afraid that that will make her hesitant to meet mine.\n\nI really want to introduce her, but I'm afraid that that's moving too fast/she'll be freaked out.", "summary": "been dating a girl for around a month, just became officially my girlfriend a few days ago, things are great, but I don't know if I should introduce her to my parents yet."}
{"id": "t3_4g85ge", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20m] in a funk because I was dumped [19f]", "post": "I'm in a bit of a hole. My issues are currently crashing in on me. My body issues, being dumped, and college fuck ups.\n\nMy ex who dumped me abused me. Emotionally and physically. She was an unmedicated bipolar. She would go from either telling me about how good other guys were looking and commenting on how bad I look. Then she would hit me, and actually stabbed me twice. Me like an idiot stayed. We were together for 2 and a half years. It's 2 months removed from being dumped and it still hurts. The breakup came from no fault of my own. I feel dumb. I'm still not over her, I cry daily and still hurt.\n\nI have no clue what I want out of life. I gave up a scholarship for music because my ex didn't want me to go. Like a fucking idiot. Now I'm stuck in a path I hate. My one passion was music and now I can't get back into it, I'm 3 years removed. My motivation and passion is truly gone. I need help reddit, help me get over my breakup and get motivation.", "summary": "Kinda depressed. Dumped by abusive ex. Gave up passion for her. Now I'm stuck in a life I hate that she abandoned me with"}
{"id": "t3_3cncdi", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[HELP] Dog continues to lick one spot, usually immediately after left alone.", "post": "Hello, I need some help. My dog has a licking problem, one where she will continue to lick one particular spot. I've had her for a year and during this time, there is always one spot at a time she keeps licking, 4 in total so far, with one being here for months now on her front leg, fur is gone and it was infected before. She keeps licking until it bleeds, and when I find out I'll put ointment on it. I've been to the vet before because she seems to have developed an allergy to something randomly (started getting scaly skin and dandruff), but it hasn't been determined what it is yet (not food) and the licking issue, while brought up, wasn't really directly addressed. This is getting very stressful though, as my dad is also pressuring me to give her up to tend to my own emotional needs I'm trying to attend. I've tried to pinpoint if it may be something such as bordem, but I'm attending college, though not in school right now as it's summer and I currently don't have a job so I literally have spent months just her and me. I know it's not her \"fault\" but she keeps breaking my trust. If she's alone for literally 5 minutes, whether it's me showering or her going to her kennel after a walk and I'm in the living room she goes at it and then is afraid to see me because she knows how disappointed I get. I can tell whenever she does it everytime. I've tried wrapping it in every which way but she has torn everything off right after I leave her alone, and while I don't have an official E-collar, she has scratched off the homemade one as well silently, when she was sitting behind me. I really need help to address this and any advice would be greatly appreciated as I'm leaving her for a week to go to a family reunion many states away soon. Thank you.", "summary": "Dog keeps licking one place since I've got her and when I leave her alone for 5 minutes, she tears off all wraps, and I have to leave her at a dog-sitter soon for a week."}
{"id": "t3_3raf3y", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "High-rise construction seriously affecting daily life - should we ask our landlords for a rent reduction?", "post": "We live on the 13th floor of a high rise, in a condo that we rent.  We've lived here 3 years and love it, it's a really nice place in a great area, close to lots of nature.  This past year they've been working on the facade and balconies to bring them up to code.  The noise is constant, and after we told our landlords about it they decided not to raise our rent for the next year (as they were going to).  We really like our landlords, they've extremely fair and good people.\n\nThe construction started on our floor a few months ago.  Currently, our windows are boarded up (no sunlight), we have no access to our balconies or fresh air, and the noise is pretty unbearable before 5pm, and some saturdays.  Today things got much worse, as they have to replace a window in our living room, so we had to move all our furniture so that they could construct a plywood \"room\" for them to access half of our LR.  I think this \"room\" should only last a few weeks, but construction on our floor will go until March, at least.\n\nWe pay a lot to live here, and while I'm thankful that our landlords didn't raise the rent, I am growing increasingly more irritated that we pay so much to live in such a headache.  The facade of our building has no bearing on us, and will not increase our quality of life once it is finished, but I imagine it will for our landlords (the owners of our unit).\n\nI do not want to financially hurt our landlords, because this is obviously not their fault, but man - I would NEVER have moved in had I know that this would be our life in a few years.  Should I ask for a rent reduction?  If so, how should I put it?", "summary": "Construction around our apt is a nightmare.  We want to ask for a reduction in rent but don't want to hurt our landlords financially.  What do we do?*"}
{"id": "t3_kqq5m", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Loseit, I am about to embark (pics). What tips do you have for me?", "post": "Loseit, I have for you a success story gone awry.\n\nIn my sophomore year of high school, I finally realized I was fat. It had never occurred to me before until I saw myself in a video. I was 180 pounds. I was shocked by how obese I was. I decided to do something about it. I wasn't really sure how to go about it, but started watching what I ate, walking more, took a dance class or two, but didn't get really serious about it until just after high school. a\n\nIt was the year after high school I became something of a gym rat. I got addicted to bike riding and would hit the gym every day without fail, just because of how good it felt. I lost a lot of inches (not much weight, what with building so much muscle from dance, running and biking, but I did go from a size 12-14 to a size 10.\n\nI was steadily making my way down to a size 8 and very happy with my progress and how great I felt.\n\n[Cue the \"gone awry\" part.]\n\nI moved to New York for volunteer work and (long story short) had a nightmarish experience. I gained so much weight that I am now the heaviest I have ever been in my life.\n\nI am at a size 14 and hate everything about that. I am shaking off some PTSD from my experience and I believe in order to be healthy again mentally, I need to lose all the weight I brought back with me.\n\nHelp me, Loseit! None of my clothes fit! What tips do you have for a beginner in her early twenties who went from this confident girl:\n\n  \n  \n \n\nTo this new frightened and unhealthy version:", "summary": "Gained LOTS of weight over a year. What are some tips to keep in mind as I lose it all for the second time?"}
{"id": "t3_14ptri", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey reddit, I've been feeling pretty weird recently, like perpetually tired/foggy/hungover-ish. What gives?", "post": "Hey reddit,\n\nSo last few weeks I've been feeling like when you didn't sleep much last night, or you're slightly hungover. That kind of foggyness, muddyness, stuffy head or however you want to describe it. Kind of like when you're slightly sick or coming off a fever.\n\nA slight headache too. I have been sleeping more that usual, sometimes a lot more, but waking up feeling super tired. \n\nLike today I had a final and I slept over 9 hours. I woke up super tired, with a slight headache, and a stuffy feeling head. It was hard to concentrate and even after drinking a monster I felt the same. I later drank another coffee and I was still tired. \n\nI don't think I'm sick because it's been a couple weeks and other than that I feel fine. It's not mono because I already had it when I was a little kid. \n\nWhat could it be? Is it anything to worry about? Am I slowly losing my cognitive powers and am destined to become an omega rather than a beta or whatever I am?\n\nThanks for your time!", "summary": "Getting enough sleep, not sick. Still tired, muddy/stuffy brain, feeling weird. Caffeine little to no effect. What gives?"}
{"id": "t3_31zxdj", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Not sure if what I want to do is acceptable in a woman's eyes. Need advice.", "post": "I've met this girl at my office building. She works as a barista in my office building and I frequent that coffee place regularly. Over the past few days I've come to talk to her more and in the process getting to know a little about her such as her name, education background, near-future plans, etc.\n\nWe are by no means considered friends yet but she does remember my order and we do greet each other whenever we bump into each other (we park on the same floor of the building).\n\nI plan to ask her out but was also thinking of leaving a note on her car (using a receipt from my earlier purchase at the coffee place). The note is just to say thanks for the awesome coffee and that she'd have a wonderful weekend.\n\nMy dilemma is would it be seen as too much or creepy? She knows that I know which car she drives as we've seen each other in our cars while parking before. That being said, would it still be considered OK to leave a note on her car?", "summary": "Met a girl at a coffee place, talked a bit with her and plan to ask her out. Want to leave a thank you note on her car for the coffee but not sure if it's ok."}
{"id": "t3_18xrc3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [24F] handle my sister [17F] and confrontations with family during the last days of my family visit?", "post": "My mother had me when she was a teenager. I'm the first to go to college in my family. I have my own place states away from them and a good relationship, so I'd say I'm doing pretty well. \n\nMy mom got remarried and had my sister. It's obvious that they've always favored her. I had a hard time fitting in with my new dad's super conservative Catholic family, since I'm technically the bastard child of some other man. I was around the age of seven when they got married. My family is visiting me this week, since I try to see them once a year. I've already had enough of her snarky teenage attitude and my mother's blatant favoritism. My dad kind of checks out and ignores things for the most part, so I don't mind him so much. However, if I ever get into a fight with my mom, he always sides with her (understandable), but he does it in a way where he doesn't care to have a clue as to what the fight is even about and acts authoritative (not cool).", "summary": "My sister is the favorite child and I don't know how to deal with her and my mom's snark, help?"}
{"id": "t3_heaj5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I let my GF know I'm coming to visit from halfway around the world?", "post": "(Throwaway account)\n\nI'm in a relationship with a girl from Japan. We met when we were both studying abroad in the US. We've been together for one and a half year and half of the time has been in a long distance relationship(I live in Norway). However we're doing awesome and are really happy together. The thing is though: she was suppose to come visit me in Norway in the summer, but because of some understandable circumstances she most likely will not be able to after all. \n\nToday I found out that I won't have nothing to do for like 3 weeks in June, so I've found out that I will go visit her instead. I thought it would be fun to surprise her. The first time I brought her home to meet my family(when we came from the US) I told them(my family) to meet me on Skype and then we just showed up at the doorstep, it was awesome. She however was a little nervous about the whole thing, but it went quickly over as soon as she met them, and it made a fun story today.\n\nShe did however tell me not to do that to her in Japan, but I'm not sure if she was joking or not(and thats why I need advice). We're both in our twenties, we talk almost every day and joke and laugh a lot. Its been too long since we've met though, last time was in december when I met her family(which were also awesome). So should I let her know that I'm coming? How would you react if your BF/GF did this to you?", "summary": "Need advice to decide if I should let my GF in Japan know that I'm coming on a surprise visit from Norway."}
{"id": "t3_zjwhq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Girlfriend was forced into a something she didn't want to by another man what should I do?", "post": "My girlfriend attended a house party last night at her college (I am at another collage) and she had been drinking and was forced into giving another man a handjob. I am not upset with her because I understand that situation was out of her control. I am very hurt though and am unsure what I should do. I want to go beat this guy until he can't feel pain anymore but I know that would just make things worse and I am not sure what I should do. I have been supportive of her and reminded her how much I care about and love her as best as I could, i even canceled plans litteralily last min which caused a lot of confusion as I was a dd for the trip and got tickets on the first bus ride back to see her. but I feel like there is something I should be doing to help her and I willing to do whatever I can to help her.", "summary": "my gf was forced to give another guy a hand job while I have been away and I am not sure what I should do to help her."}
{"id": "t3_2nx1el", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15 M] found out girl I liked [15 F] likes me but isn't ready for a relationship, what do I do?", "post": "I like this girl (lets call her Q) and it ended up getting around to one of my friends (who is also a close friend of Q) and she figured out that Q also likes me, but isn't ready for a relationship. She also managed to slip that I liked Q. So Q knows that I like her, and she knows that I know she likes me. I'm just a kid and the relationship will probably end up dead in the ground a few months after it starts but what the hell. I know this is barely even something worth asking for advice but I've never been in a situation like this before so any advice will help. This happened about a week or two ago, and I contemplated asking her if she wanted to come over and play video games (She enjoys playing video games, we both own a wii u and smash and stuff) but I don't want to scare her by coming off as super pushy and stuff. She i only in one of my classes but I still talk to her every day. (over text) I'm not sure what I should do and I'm afraid I will just end up never doing anything at all.", "summary": "Found out a girl I like also likes me, we know we like eachother, she isn't ready for a relationship. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_qq2eb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How quick is your reaction time and how accurate are you?", "post": "I feel weird asking this, but here it goes. Whenever something falls down, comes towards me, or moves quickly in my direct line of sight I move to intercept it involuntarily. For example, in the shower if soap leaves my hands I usually kick it into the air to catch it. If a can falls off of a tale I usually reach to grab it (and I usually catch it). If I drop my phone I usually catch it with my foot. My friend just threw a Now 'n Later candy at me and I caught it before it hit me in the man-tit.", "summary": "Either this is common and I'm overly excited or I have super powers. How fast and often do you react to sudden events, and how accurate are you when you do it?"}
{"id": "t3_307nja", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20/M] think I want to break up with my girlfriend [19/F] of two years, but don't know if I am justified in doing so.", "post": "Hello Reddit! I am a 20 year old male college student dating a 19 year old female college student. We have been dating for 2 years- since our senior year in highschool. We are both sophomores, we go to the same university, and we live across the street from one another. Our relationship is very stable and healthy. We spend lots of time together, but we don't overdo it. We have few arguments and when we do we work through them together. I honestly don't see an end to our relationship in the near future.\n\nAnd that is the problem.\n\nRecently I have been thinking about breaking it off with her in order to just be myself for awhile and possibly see other people. We are both so young, and the thought of dating her indefinitely scares me to death. \n\nI have also been questioning my feelings for her for quite some time. I really cannot tell if I \"love\" her or not. We say the words to each other but every time I say them I can't help but question if I mean them or not. Shouldn't the feelings be obvious if I say \"I love you?\" I don't feel like I put in much effort to the relationship, either. I feel like I'm just coasting. Obviously I'm there for her when she needs me and I pay her the attention she deserves, but I don't ever feel the urge to go out of my way do something meaningful or romantic.\n\nI almost feel \"numb\" to the whole emotional side of our relationship. I love her as a friend, I consider her one of my best friends, and I have fun hanging out and doing things with her, but I just don't feel emotionally or romantically \"stirred\" by her.\n\nIf there is someone out there who can make me happier than she can, don't I owe it to myself to find that person?\n\n I'm in great need of some unbiased, third party opinions, so any thoughts that you guys have please share them! Thanks for your help!", "summary": "I feel stuck in a relationship where I am unsure of my feelings. I also think I'd like to see other people. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_35zonb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my boyfriend [20M] for 1.5 years. How much should we consider each other when planning our post-graduation plans?", "post": "So, first of all, I love my boyfriend a lot and he loves me back. I wouldn't be at all surprised if we end up together forever.\n\nBUT at the same time, we're only 20. We're going into our senior year of college. He's been abroad this semester, so we haven't seen each other since January, but that's only made me more committed to the relationship and sure that it's what I want.\n\nI know we could both probably end up working/going to grad school in the same city and be happy after graduation, but at the same time, I feel like I should travel/take the best grad school or job offer I get regardless of where he is (and I think he should do the same), especially while we're young.\n\nBut also, I don't know if I would be happy doing those things without him. I know how difficult long distance is, and he's really important to me, but I also know that we can make it work whatever we decide.", "summary": "Boyfriend and I are young and in a committed relationship at the same time as having to make a lot of important future plans and it is hard."}
{"id": "t3_1c2xt7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Over the past year five of my male friends have come forward about a good friend M[22] making inappropriate sexual contact with them. Advice?", "post": "Five friend, all around the ages of 21-22, have come forward at various times to say that our friend, who we'll call Carl, has touched them inappropriately.  They haven't come forward publicly, but there are a few of us who know about all five of them.  Carl doesn't know that we know.  One of the 5 guys, who we'll call Fred, described the even as follows:\n\nWe were all hanging out having a guys night, and were all drinking beer or liquor.  Eventually everyone passed out after drinking heavily.   Fred woke up to Carl trying to take off his belt.  Fred shrugged him off and told him to go away.  He woke up that morning vaguely recalling the incident but he wasn't sure it was a dream or not. \n\nThe rest of the guys have similar stories, including alcohol and a hand down the pants or trying to take a belt off.  \n\nThe most recent person to come forward told a different story, where it was just 3 guys sleeping over playing video games and such.  The friend, Mike, said that none of them were drinking that night and he woke up with Carl's hands down his pants.  He told him to get away and spent an uneasy night awake.  Carl texted him later that day and asked him if he wanted to \"do anything\".  Mike says this incident happened a few years ago.\n\nNow, Carl doesn't identify in gay in any way, and he's had girlfriends before.  He is a man's man, a college football player who loves drinking beer and playing videogames.  But we don't want something like this to happen again and we're not sure what to do, because we value his friendship.\n\nOur main theory is that he is trapped in the closet, because his father is very anti gay and is an intense man. \n\nReddit, we're not sure what to do and we could use some advice.", "summary": "One of my friends has made inappropriate homosexual contact with 5 of my other friends, we're not sure how to handle it "}
{"id": "t3_1j7kcr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Recent break up of 1 week, together for 10 months with ex boyfriend. Just found out there may be chance I am pregnant.", "post": "Recently just broke up with my boyfriend of 10 months. It was out of the blue and the break up was one sided. It was entirely his decision to end it. Apparently its the same old cliche line \"it's not you its me\". He needs to \"sort his shit out\".\n\nAnd now adding on to be even more cliche things there is a high chance I am pregnant. I took a home pregnancy test and it came back positive. In the mornings the past week I have felt extremely nauseous and have thrown up on multiple occasions and by the afternoon I'm fine. I'm going to make a doctors appointment tomorrow to go get a blood test to see if it is definite or not.\n\nDo I tell him or do I not tell him? He has made it pretty clear that he does not want to be with me but at the same time I know he still cares. I don't have any idea what to do. A large part of me doesn't want to tell him.\n \n\nAny advice please would be appreciated.", "summary": "My boyfriend and I just recently broke up, to add to a shitty situation there may be a chance I'm pregnant. I don't know whether to tell him or not. A large part of me wants to not tell him."}
{"id": "t3_1o55tk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M/F] with my break gf [20F] 3 months, we're on a break and I like another girl but still undecided on who to choose.", "post": "Currently, I am in a break with my so.  Let's call her V.  She wanted to be on break because she lost herself in our relationship and she feels vindicated to be young and do whatever(just drugs and partying) she says she doesn't sleep around and I believe her.  A little back story we are dysfunctional.  She has anger issues and puts them on me and we have horrible mis-communication.  We argue almost every week then make up.  During this break I was doing me, and I talked to a girl who I talked to before but never met online.  The new girl let's call her W.  W and I are getting serious and I wanted to break up with V.  I managed to break up with V but she asked me to come over for sex.  I agreed and she tells me she loves me still and reassured me that she never really wanted to break up but to go on break because we saw each other a lot and problems arouse.  Thing is I'm suppose to meet up with W and drive four hours to her and spend time with her.  I'm currently confused on who to really go for.", "summary": "My gf and I went on break from each other didn't really go on break and problems escalated.  I met a new girl and she lives four hours away and still undecided on who to date."}
{"id": "t3_22l799", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] have been with my [22 F] girlfriend for nearly 5 years. I now have a major crush on someone else.", "post": "So I have been dating my girlfriend for 6 years (high school sweethearts) and she is one of the nicest people I have ever met. I have always been extremely happy with our relationship because I feel that we are extremely compatible and there hasn't really anything wrong with our relationship. We only fight like once a year and have never broken up before.\n\nI am a personal trainer and recently I gave a fitness assessment and training session to this other girl who is incredible and I feel that we have an amazing amount of chemistry. I'm not sure if I have ever met someone who I've enjoyed talking to this much and I feel guilty that I can't really get her off my mind.\n\nI am a good guy who is just a little confused with how I'm feeling. This is kind of the first crush I've had since I've been with my girlfriend and I don't know what to make of it. I just want to be clear that I would never cheat on anyone and am not contemplating that in the slightest.\n\nWhile my relationship hasn't really ever been rocky, there are some underlying issues. One of the big ones is that we currently live in a big city that I am perfectly content with, but she hates it. We've been contemplating moving to a smaller town somewhere in a different state, but I am not sure if that is something I want. She really doesn't want to stay here and no matter which of us makes the compromise, I feel that the other will regret it.\n\nAbout 8 months ago, I also moved in to her apartment with her and her 2 female roommates, and this led me to feeling a little on & off depressed over the last 6 months. I originally thought that my sadness was just because I didn't really feel at home living with 3 girls and am used to \"me\" time as well as \"bro\" time with my former roommates. \n\nAll of these things combined with this crush that I now have are just leaving me confused and worried about the future.", "summary": "I've dated my girlfriend for 6 years an we are extremely compatible. Uncertainty about the future and chemistry with a new person is making me a wreck."}
{"id": "t3_2z0zzt", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU: By standing around in a relaxed manner among a group of wild beasts.", "post": "Earlier this morning I was out running the dogs (Westie, Goldendoodle, Black Lab, English Setter) with my father, uncle and a friend.  My uncle has a beautiful/crazy fox red Golden retriever named Remmy. I decided to bring my new camera along, pop a few photos of some happy dogs. It was going to be a good day.\n\nWaiting for everybody to get situated before heading out, I was taking a few photos, but really just kind of standing around holding my camera at my side. I was not wearing the neck strap, because you know, I was just standing there.\n\nAbout this time Remmy, in her sheer bliss, sped past me and looped the neck strap around her neck and took off like a missile dragging a DSLR shaped anchor across the gravel parking lot. I am a big dude and the chase was not graceful. Luckily I'm only down one lens.", "summary": "Uncles dog dragged my new DSLR across a parking lot because I was careless.  I gave chase and found out I am not as fast as a golden retriever."}
{"id": "t3_3bve6c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18m) can't figure out my feelings for her (18f)", "post": "This is my first year of uni. At the start if the year I met this chick doing the same course as me and who also happened to be on my dorm floor. We started hanging out a lot, and we became close pretty fast. We're very similar in a lot of ways, including music/movie tastes and life beliefs. We both also happen to have depression, and we've had some really honest conversations with each other (I've probably shared more with her than I've shared with my therapist). She's my best friend. \n\nI never really considered anything but a platonic relationship with her until quite recently: when we started getting drunk together. Basically every time we did there would be this strange sexual tension. Until one night we kinda started cuddling and then slept (literally slept) together. Since then (about 2 weeks ago) we've spent a lot of evenings with each other: her staying the night probably more often than not. Things have escalated to kissing, then boob touching, then fingering, then last night I ate her out (after being in town) and we slept together naked. I should note that we're both quite sexually inexperienced. I've gotten with only 4 girls before, and only had proper sex with one of them a couple of times. Aside from making out with other people, the only sexual stuff that she's done has been with me. \n\nHowever, since we have depression, we can both be quite mean to each other sometimes. Also quite manipulative. It often feels like we're competing. We've talked about it before and agreed that it's dumb. I'm hesitant to date her because it seems like it could end up being an awful relationship. I'm hesitant to bang her because despite what I wrote above, her friendship is very important to me: I'd say we both help each other a lot when going through particularly shitty times. I told her I wanted to be friends with benefits but I don't think she's happy with that and I don't think I am really either tbh.", "summary": "getting sexual with best friend. Confused mess, not sure where to go from here. Advice from anyone with more life experience appreciated"}
{"id": "t3_20uf3g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Would it be creepy to do this? [21,M]", "post": "I was at a local cafe and saw a girl I went to high school with, but never got to know her. I believe she was a grade below me. I always thought she was pretty, but I've never had the balls to go up and ask a girl out. The same can be said in this situation.. She was there for about an hour and we never spoke a word, but she did look at me a few times.\n\nWould it be creepy if I found her on Facebook and asked her out/started talking to her? I have no idea what her name is, but I'm sure I can find her in a yearbook. What's your opinion on this, reddit?", "summary": "Saw a girl I went to highschool with at a local cafe, but never got around to talking to her. Would it be creepy if I found her on facebook and started chatting/asked her out?"}
{"id": "t3_s162q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Accidental Incest- Wtf do I do now?", "post": "I need help reddit like never before, being a long time reader of this board I never thought I would be the one posting but this is the only place I feel like I can ask for advice..\n\nBackground: Me (30 M) and the girl (24 F) met over two years ago via mutual friends and we hit it off great, after a year we entered a relationship and just two months ago we moved in together. We have our differences and our little fights like everyone but really, everything has been wonderful, to the point where we were discussing marriage. \n\nBoth of us were raised in the foster system, I was removed from my household when I was 10, she was around 7 so we've always had this in common and been able to confide in one another about this. \n\nRecently: My biological father passed away which meant little to nothing to me since my foster father adopted me and has been absolutely great. However.. The woman I am with also received an invitation to the funeral because its her dad also.\n\nShes already packed up her things and is staying with her best friend. This situation is so screwed up I honestly didn't believe things like this could happen. I'm torn.. I really am, I felt like I loved this woman, I thought about our future together and now I don't know what the hell to do. We have crossed the line physically and when we tried to talk about it she broke down and started crying, she won't speak to me anymore.\n\nJust as more background.. Yes we have spoken about our pasts before, yes we have spoken about our parents but it has always been \"my mother was a druggie and my dad a drunk\" we have separate last names and to be honest I just NEVER considered it a possibility that we could be related. What the hell do I do? I honestly felt like I was in love and in one day everything has fallen apart.", "summary": "Found out the woman I have been seeing and saying 'I love you' too is actually my younger sister. Now more then ever I wished I had kept in contact with my biological family. What the hell do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4btpvt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 24 M with my 23 have been friends with benefits even though she has a boyfriend.", "post": "Reddit, \n\nI have some lady issues I need to get straightened out. To be clear, I've been friend zoned. Yes, that dreadful word that we've all been through has slapped me in the face. Let's call her Mary for the sake of privacy. Marry and I have been talking / seeing each other for about two months. We're both really attracted to each other and enjoy each others company, but she has a boyfriend. She's been in a long distance relationship for under a year and rarely sees the guy. \n\nThis was my golden opportunity I thought to myself, but it got weird. After talking for awhile. She deletes my number and only contacts me on Facebook. She's obviously attempted to quit communicating with me, but cant help herself. We still hangout weekly for drinks and other adventures. When we hang out we become intimate and cant keep our hands off each other. I would like to date her and create a relationship, but I feel like I'm being used.", "summary": "What should I do? Should I Cut her off and look for more fish in the sea? Should I ride the wave and see if they brake up? Or should I be the guy she occasionally cheats on once in a while?"}
{"id": "t3_o99pg", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Trying to find a legitimate job working from home", "post": "My wife has a dilemma (and by proxy, so do I)...\n\nShe's become quite frustrated with the job opportunities in our area.  Her education is a combination of business and IT, you'd think that would be a good combination, but she hasn't been able to find a job she's been happy in.  She seems to be able to snag IT positions fairly easily (especially internal desktop support), this is because HR departments seem to go all wobbly in the knees when they see a women in IT, but when she gets into the job, no one respects her as IT is, lets be honest, dominated by neck-beards and people who just like hearing the sound of their own voice.  Any ideas she comes up with are often regarded as bad ideas initially, but after a week or so, a guy draws the same conclusion and its the greatest idea in the world without any credit to her.\n\nCurrently, she's in a low-pay customer service position, not her ideal job.  We would move to another city, but I've found a very good job that's helping to solidify my career that I can't give up (I also work in IT, and I can't believe the crap she has put up with as I definitely don't notice the same in any recent jobs I've held).\n\nSo, she's expressed an interest in working from home, obviously these kind of jobs won't be posted on a local job site, is there a resource out there that actually guides you to from working from home?  I largely considered 'work-at-home' jobs mythical in nature, since most that I've heard of are held by people who were already in a high-paying position at a company and could transition to being remote only.\n\nBackstory", "summary": "going to work for douchbags sucks, want to work from home, need a place to start looking and get ideas."}
{"id": "t3_jxrbt", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I think I may have just lost the girl I love with all my heart forever...", "post": "Earlier tonight I did the dumbest thing possible, I sent an unintended text to my girlfriend that was hurtful and insincere. I had been texting a friend of mine about a meeting that we had planed for tomorrow concerning a project we are working on with my girlfriend. The text I sent  to her that was meant for him was \"She said 3pm works for her but with the way she has been acting lately I don't know if she is going to \"have something come up\"\".  This was said while I was frustrated and drunk. I didn't truly mean it. I feel like the biggest piece of shit on the planet at the moment. How do I make this right? I love her with all my heart and don't want this to be the end. PLEASE HELP ME!!!!", "summary": "Accidentally sent m girlfriend a hurtful insincere text message and I fear that this might be the end. Please help me make this right!"}
{"id": "t3_4c76ft", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by bubble-bathing the toilet..", "post": "This happened about 45m ago..\n\nSo as I was the last person to use the toilet in regulation time, shall we say, as in the last person before everyone goes to bed, it was my task to bleach it to make it lovely and clean for the first user tomorrow morning.. simple!..\n\nUh-uh..\n\nIn my infinite wisdom I decide that, to aid said cleaning process, a cocktail of bleach, Wilko's Rhubard and Vanilla Fragrance Explosion Bath Foam (enticing, I know) and Head and Shoulders would be applicable.. apparently not!..\n\nMere seconds after the flush, toilet explodes with suds and bubbles going everywhere, overflowing and basically looking like some sort of bubble bath monster has crawled through the depths of the plumbing system and then sloth-ed itself all over my bathroom floor.. honestly more bubbles than a standard 15y/o girl having a bath.. madness..\n\nThen entered a disturbed mother, who quickly turned from sleeping standard to the Incredible Hulk.. going to leave it overnight and hope the bubbles clear.. but just in case..\n\nAnyone know how to clear vast quantities of bubble-bath?", "summary": "decided to clean toilet using bubble-bath and Head + Shoulders, suds monster arrived up through the bowl pretty quickly, bathroom now looks like Ibiza foam party.."}
{"id": "t3_18lmy1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend got a Valentine gift from his \"girl\" friend", "post": "This is still bothering me so I decided I was going to ask you guys.\n\nHe's 24, I'm 21, and we're in a seven month relationship.\n\nHe has this one female friend/co-worker that I do not like at all.  She's very flirty with him, even in front of me.  They became friends shortly after him and I started dating.\n\nYesterday, she gave him a big box of chocolates and a cute little card to go with it.  I'm not the jealous type but this definitely made me jealous for some reason.  I feel like she's overstepping boundaries but he doesn't see it.  He thinks she's just being friendly and he doesn't think she has romantic feelings for him.  \n\nApparently she saw the flowers he got me because he had them delivered to his office so he could surprise me with them when he got home.  When she saw the flowers he said she was like, \"Oh my gosh! Did you get those for meeeeee?\"  He said she was joking but it still pissed me off.\n\nWhat can I do about this girl?  She always texts him, leaves comments on his Facebook wall, etc. \n\nAre there good ways to start a conversation about this girl?  It's kind of difficult to bring it up out of the blue because he doesn't talk about her that often.", "summary": "Boyfriend has a friend who I think is being inappropriate.  She got him a Valentine gift, which pretty much set me off.  How do I talk to him about this chick?"}
{"id": "t3_14yhk9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redditors, have you ever gone had to go from being friendless to having a solid social life? How did you do it?", "post": "Hey Reddit.\n\nLike a lot of people on here, I'm introverted. We all have our social hang ups, mine particularly is that I have quite a bit of social anxiety and have trouble connecting with people in loud atmospheres, especially parties and bars. I don't have a lot of popular interests... I listen to hip hop and play video games, don't follow sports, and have a fucking hard time with social networking. It always seems that I end up as the odd person out when I'm with a group of people.\n\nI've been in relationships all my life, but recently I've gone through a pretty devastating break-up. We're both to blame, but I want to get back together after 2 months apart but she doesn't. Most people might find the freedom awesome after a long relationship, but because we were so close and home bodied, I have no friends now, and it makes it so much worse missing someone.", "summary": "I'm asking you, Reddit, what are your strategies for finding friends and holding on to them? No friends, no girl. How do people change their lives?"}
{"id": "t3_28b13o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (30f) don't know where to go for support", "post": "I'm a 30 year old female. Cut my parents out of my life and have a strained relationship with my brother and sister. \n\nI still talk to some of my aunts and uncles (mom's sisters and brothers). They don't push me to restore contact with my mom, they completely understand why I have to do what I have to do. \n\nOne of my family members had a baby die in utero 2 weeks before she was to be born. My immediate family has experience with this situation and i'd like to be there for my aunts and cousins at the funeral. \n\nI know my mom will be in attendance. I know I cannot face her alone, if she's cold, if she wants to talk, I'm not interested in any of it. \n\nMy live in bf (also 30) and i have been together for 10 months. He just started a new job that is admittedly cool, but he is absolutely obsessed with it. All conversations, all errands we run, are related to his job. Anything not related to the job he doesn't have bandwidth for. I've tried asking for support. Asking for hugs. Asking him to come to the funeral, and he says I need to deal with my family on my own. He doesn't have time to take off work (the funeral is Tuesday).\n\nI don't know where I can go for support or who to talk to. I have a few casual friends but no one who would let me vent like I feel I need. No one to come with me. Do i look internally for the support? \n\nAny advice would be great. Thanks reddit. (yep, it's a throwaway, no gw posts).", "summary": "strained family, death in the family, can't go to the funeral alone. need advice on how to become a support for myself, because i can't trust anyone else in my life to help."}
{"id": "t3_1p5q14", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Planning to Travel Europe. Looking for Tips and Tricks and Maybe a Few Buddies.", "post": "Hi :)\n\nNames Joshua and I plan to go on an adventure within the next year or so to the great European continent. I was hoping to hear some tips and tricks from fellow travelers or those whom occupy the nations. I will list some details in the next few paragraphs. Please post anything related to my plan, because it is all new to me!!\n\nI plan to join the Merchant Mariner's after finishing my Seafarers schooling. \n\nAfter working the boat, I hope to hit the EU scene with one of my best friends whom is doing the same thing.\n\nCountries in mind include: France, Italy, Germany, Norway or Denmark, Spain, and Austria. But the sky is the limit.\n\nWe plan to Back-Pack it the whole way with about 10,000 grand in our spending budget, as well as another 10 grand in our savings. (each)\n\nWe are definitely looking for new experiences and being able to go with the flow. Really hoping to meet some new people!\n\nI'm really excited to start this adventure and during my time working and saving I will be studying and planning this trip. All information is helpful. I am especially interested in understanding the state of the economy, what type of VISA I should apply for (if any), what to pack and bring, and most defintelly I am looking for people who might be interested to take us in for a few days and/or provide us with work.\n\nThink of it as bumming around Europe.. But with cash in hand.", "summary": "Traveling Europe and seeking info on the nations and what to expect. Also looking for people interested to provide places to stay and/or work."}
{"id": "t3_141iyi", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "I'm writing a travel guide about my city. What do you think I should include that other travel guides often don't?", "post": "Hey. I'm writing a travel guide about Buenos Aires because all the mainstream ones there are aren't good and because I think that it would be fun if there was a guide written by an actual local.\nSo far, I've been writing everything one would need to know to subsist here. That doesn't include, for example, ~good restaurants, but it does include how to stop a bus here, or where are the reasonable places to stay, which isn't really where the most hotels are. What I'm trying to write is a guidebook that gives tips regardless of the tourism industry's recommendations or what is usually expected for a tourist to do in the city.\nFor this reason, I'd like to know what are the things you think should be in a travel guide but that are often left unanswered. Like, the situations in where you're all like WHAT SHOULD I DO NOW THIS BOOKS SAYS NOTHING ABOUT THESE KIND OF STUATIONS and you'd have liked to have avoided. Can you please help me?", "summary": "I'm writing a travel guide about Buenos Aires. Travel guides don't often cover important topics. What do you think are this kind of topics?"}
{"id": "t3_t09fh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What skills are required to be a Director of Marketing?", "post": "I interviewed for a Director of Marketing / ecommerce  for a fashion company that has 500 stores in America. I have over 10 years experience in digital marketing and creative direction. I also ran the marketing for 2 decently sized fashion brands. I met with a extremely experienced individual, the VP of ecommerce marketing. \n\nHe brought up some insights that totally change my perspective on my own skill set. He said my main skill was my talent in creative direction which I agree with (I mainly held creative direction positions). He also added that the position would not be a fit because it mainly focused on areas of SEO, SEM, CRM -- but I have extensive experience all three of those areas. \n\nThis is where my mind was blown and I need guidance. \n\nHe said if he hires he wants to see me create a plan that will guarantee and generate a 10 million dollar profit within 1-2 years.\n\nI've created marketing campaigns, I've produced video commercials, and I've created and managed every kind of online marketing account you can imagine BUT I've never been asked to do a task like that. I understanding branding, social media, paid search, SEO, and just about everything to do with interactive marketing. \n\nI always thought of myself as a capable marketer but after this interview it made me really think. \n\nDo I not posses the correct experience to be a Director of Marketing and what can I do to improve this? What am I missing here?", "summary": "I interviewed for a job that I thought I was extremely capable at but then realized I'm not and want to improve."}
{"id": "t3_3a8hza", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Can't stand living at home, need financial independence", "post": "Hey guys, first time posting here so lmk if I'm doing anything wrong! I'm 23 years old and I just graduated from my bachelor's program, so I'm back at home for the year. I'm applying to dental schools in the states (but Canadian) for next September, so I'll be living at home for the next 16 months and I don't know if I can do this anymore. I've been back for 3 months and I already feel so suffocated and I'm being treated like a child. My dad is very controlling and doesn't want me to stay out of the house past 10pm (yes, I'm 23). He always wants me home on time and we have already gotten into many fights about this because he is very firm with it. I have a boyfriend and I have a life, and last night we got into a huge fight and he told me to either be home at 10pm latest every night or pack my bags and move out. I wish I could just find a job with my degree and have a salary and be independent, but that's not the case. I'm going to need him to co-sign dental loans next year and I'm scared if I move out he won't want to take me back in and help with the loans. Also, I'm currently studying for the DAT, so I don't work that many hours a week.. so I'm very low on money and I couldn't even afford rent. Should I look into a line of credit and maybe do that for the next 16 months? Or should I just suck it up and live at home because I need those dental loans and don't want to get on his bad side. I'm not sure if there are any other options to be financially independent... Please help!", "summary": "controlling dad, it's getting to be too much and I want to move out but don't have the funds + need his help with co-signing loans for dental school"}
{"id": "t3_3tkws7", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Got a $300 bill from the dentist, as it turns out insurance won't cover incomplete work. Details in post.", "post": "Hello r/personalfinance, long time listener, first time caller. I'm not entirely sure this is the right place to post this, but as I peruse here quite a bit I thought it would be worth a shot.\n\nThe backstory: in June I got a very sore tooth treated with a root canal. The dentist supposedly removed the roots and filled my tooth with a temporary filling. They told me to come back in a week to complete the next step but could not get me in for a month. I went back and they said I had a lot of bacteria and to come back in another month after a course of antibiotics. I came back again a month later and they said it was bleeding excessively and had to drain, so I should come back in another month. At this point I was moving out of state in a week and told them so, and they essentially showed me the door. After moving, I went to another dentist who did an x-ray and said the tooth was severely decayed and needed extraction. I did experience some pain in the days leading up to the extraction and the oral surgeon told me there was still some root tissue in the supposedly completed root canal causing me pain, which isn't entirely unheard but worth noting.\n\nAlright, the part I need advice on: just yesterday, I received a bill in the mail from my former dentist for $300. I called to ask what this was for and they said the insurance company wouldn't cover the incomplete procedure. I find it very interesting that I got a bill for this in November, months after my business with them had ended. I also heard nothing from the dentist at the time saying I would have to pay for an incomplete procedure. I called the insurance company and they said to have the dentist send them x-rays and other stuff, but I'm really doubtful that will do much for me.", "summary": "getting charged for incomplete procedure on a root canal which the dentist was twice unable to complete before I moved out of state."}
{"id": "t3_34s3c1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20/f] Friend [20/m] Has a Girlfriend [21/f] Now, I might Like Him?", "post": "There's this guy who I'm very close friends with, we've been friends for about 4 years and he's been dating this girl now for 2 weeks. I've never had romantic feelings towards him before, until now. Ever since he's been dating her I feel like I've been developing a crush on him. Is it maybe just that there's a new girl in his life and I'm being territorial and not wanting her to take his attention from me? Or do you think it's an actual crush? How do I differentiate? Because it's weird that I've never had any sort of romantic feelings for him until he's dating her.", "summary": "My guy friend has a new girlfriend and ever since they've gotten together I've felt like I have a crush on him."}
{"id": "t3_1n6trh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Do all executors of a deceased family members estate have to agree in order to sell said family members estate? Or do you only need 2 to agree as the majority?", "post": "I have to provide a bit of a back story. There is a husband and wife. They own a house. The husband dies and the wife has dementia and is put into a home. Due to the wife's lack of mental capacity, 3 of their daughters were appointed as executors. The house that the father and mother lived in is up for sale. The money from this sale would not be made probate, but would go to the mother and pay for her stay at the nursing home.\n\nNOW for my question. Do all 3 of these sisters have to agree on the price of an offer in order to be able to sell it or do only 2 need to agree and they majority rule the other sister? Like if there was an offer of $150,000 and the 2 sisters agreed to that but the third sister said she doesn't want to accept any offer unless its $200,000, would it not matter because 2 over power one?", "summary": "3 sisters are executors. 2 agree on an offer on their fathers house, the third one does not. Do 2 overpower one?"}
{"id": "t3_17urbi", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (24M) started chatting with a girl (26F) online and I'm not sure what is going on.", "post": "I started messaging this girl two or three weeks ago on okcupid.  I messaged first and she replied basically saying she'd like to chat with me and get to know me.  We sent messages back and forth maybe three times before she stopped replying.  I waited 10 days before saying something simple like, \"Hey, how are you doing\" and she replied pretty quickly to that.  I shot her another message and, again, she didn't reply until I waited another week to do the same thing I previously did.  Now I'm waiting again to see if she will respond to a message.  \n\nI really want to get to know her and have a steady conversation going, but I don't want to be a nag/annoying/creep by keep messaging her.  I'm not really sure what to do.  She has made no hint that she doesn't want to talk to me and seems into it when she does reply.  She said she's bad at messaging, which I can understand, but it seems like she forgets about me.  Is there anything I can/should do?", "summary": "I've been messaging a girl online who seems interested but never responds unless I message her again and I don't wanna end up being annoying.  She is someone I really wanna get to know and I don't wanna chase her away."}
{"id": "t3_dzkpu", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Deleting a Facebook account, caused a lot of problems in my relationship. What pieces am I missing from this picture?", "post": "Dear Reddit, I have a problem.\nI fed up with Facebook, with content which is completely irrelevant. So today I decided to delete this account. I was proud enough to communicate it to my girlfriend as soon as possible. I thought that her reaction will be 180 degrees different. Instead of supporting me, she stormed me out.\nThere are some additional problem, she is leaving from my city to a different country in 7 weeks.\nBut my thought was, that for catching up we can use much better platforms like Skype, Flickr, Gtalk/Gmail etc. Damn I planned to create this kind of a platform for us.\n\nSo my question is, is it a new tendency, to treat a Facebook profile like an alter-ego? (if you don't have it you're disappearing from other peers life?)", "summary": "My girlfriend stormed me out bc of deleting a Facebook profile. Am I missing importance of it, or she is overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_infsd", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "To ultimatum, or not to ultimatum.  That is the choice.", "post": "Reddit, my ex-boyfriend (25) and I (also 25) of a year broke up a few weeks ago.  We haven't been completely solid on the radio silence, but have been trying very hard at it.  We've been slipping up every 4-5 days or so.\n\nRecently the ex wanted to meet so we can talk.  He said that he misses me, or at least he thinks he does.  But at the same time, he wonders whether or not he just misses being in a relationship.  He isn't sure.  He doesn't want me to move on just yet because he fears that once he does figure it out that he misses me it will be too late and Id have moved on.  At the time, I was sympathetic and told him Id give him a few weeks to figure it out.  I still love him and miss him dearly.\n\nReddit, not knowing is driving me nuts.  I can't move forward or backward.  I can't heal or hold on.  I need to know which direction I'm going.\n\nI've never in my life given an ultimatum to a lover, partly because they don't usually work and partly because that's not really who I am.  But in this case, reddit, is it appropriate to give him an ultimatum?  Tell him to fish or cut bait?  Tell him to make a move or lose squatters rights?  I don't know if I can deal with the uncertainty much longer.", "summary": "Ex doesn't know if he wants me back, is it appropriate to give him an ultimatum to make up his damned mind?"}
{"id": "t3_ylr8b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[29m] separated from my [25f] wife - struggling to stay friends", "post": "If you've seen the movie trailer for [Celeste and Jesse Forever] about two best friends who are married and mutually decide to separate then that accurately describes my situation. We have known each other for nearly 10 years, dated for about 7 years and were only married for less than a year. We separated two months ago and she moved in with some friends a few weeks ago while I've stayed in our apartment.\n\nI've had my ups and downs during this time and had irrational worries and rational worries as well. This past week, I was at a low point and really missed our old way of life and made a plea to have another chance together. She insisted that it will never happen. I left the conversation by basically saying our friendship was over. Immediately after that, I snapped out of my mindset and realized that I didn't want to lose her as a friend because the bond we share there is very important in my life.\n\nI wrote an e-mail the next day apologizing and explaining that I do miss her in my life but that's because I miss our friendship most of all. I apologized for breaking her trust and told her that I really wanted to somehow regain that trust so we could be friends again. She told me that it will take time and that she doesn't want to \"lead me on\" by still being friends. I've tried to insist that I'm not trying to \"get her back\" but that I just want her as a friend in my life still... someone to joke with and ask for opinions about issues in my life that she's familiar with. I think I ruined that trust when I was at my low point and I'm being met with resistance now and imposed \"no contact\" type rules for the time being. I don't want to break those rules to hurt her trust again but it's also hurting me to not have her as an option to talk to.", "summary": "Mutually separated from wife under impression that our friendship would continue; had moment of weakness where I told her I wanted her back; she resisted and trust is broken and possibly our friendship too"}
{"id": "t3_216zql", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (23F), my ex (23M), together 4 years apart 4 months. Feeling very lonely and anger, nothing is going right in my life since the break.", "post": "I feel as thought I can not let go of the anger and resentment I am feeling towards my ex. I'm not sure if this is a normal feeling to have and it is eating me up inside. He broke up with me 4 months ago and not even a month after the break up he started sleeping with a friend of his that I always had suspicions about. \n\nI feel like a dirty napkin or something to him that he used me up and just threw me away. After everything i did for him all the love and devotion I gave him in return he broke my heart and has just forgotten about my existence. \n\nI don't know how to let go of this anger. I feel like since the break up I have been the only person who has suffered. I am depressed, my life and school are going down the drain, I have lost my best friend (ex) and everyday just feels like nothing will get better. Nothing is going right for me and yes i know its not my ex's fault, but I just can't believe that he wasn't even slightly upset about the break up, which is what it feels like.\n\nI feel like no ones going to ever love me or any relationship will ever work either. I feel like I am going to be alone forever.", "summary": "feel like I'm going to be alone forever, cant let go of anger towards ex, nothing is going right for me"}
{"id": "t3_4kj01n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [34 F] broke my bf's [25 M] expensive bong", "post": "Last night we wrapped up playing Rocksmith 2014 and put the guitars in the cases.  Due to current lack of space, he places them against the wall standing up.  The space in front of them is where he parks his bongs and other smoking devices.  \n\nI'm always a bit worried they might fall if something rattles the wall, causing them to smash his stuff.  The garage is right next to that wall and can rattle the house when the 4 wheelers are going.  \n\nI said, why don't you move those away in the chance they fall?  He says, they'll be fine but I insisted.  In the process of reluctantly moving them to appease me, he cracks his $1600 medical grade glass bong.  It's sealed glass, so the inside piece that broke can't be fixed.\n\nHe looked like he wanted to cry (I would too in this situation....).  I offered to buy him a new one, but he refused.  He obviously was not happy with me at that moment, but he said it was ultimately his fault for moving them.  \n\nReddit, I've obviously now learned to keep my mouth shut regarding his items, but I still want to fix this.  I'm thinking about going by Puffin glass when we're in Spokane in a few weeks as a surprise, but he may still refuse out of pride.  Any ideas?", "summary": "I broke my bf's expensive bong.  Offered to buy a new one, he refused.  How can I make it up to him?"}
{"id": "t3_268akj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I am a [18 M] she is a [17 F] and I don't know how to read this relationship?", "post": "We've known each other through school but never talked until we had a class together. I asked her out after about a week, we went out for food, laughed, flirted etc etc. I asked her out again same situation, everything going great. Now it's three weeks later (midst of exams) and I'm starting to get the feeling that she's not thinking of this as a \"relationship\" in the conventional bf/gf sense. I'm new to the whole dating game and wondering a few things. \n\nDo I need to ask if we're together as bf/gf or is that implied by asking her out multiple times? Should I straight up ask if she likes me the way I like her? I know what the friend zone is and I'm not feeling there, yet, but we're having a movie night tomorrow just her and I. I plan on seeing what's what then by trying to get physical, not hardcore, just simple stuff like leg touches, cuddling etc. Oh and finally, to add to my lengthy situation, On our third \"date\" (studying for an exam) I drove her home and attempted to kiss her but got the infamous cheek. I didn't make a big deal about it I just moved past said \"got your things?\" and politely said goodbye preceding to wait for her to get inside her house. I've been told I shouldn't fret about ONE kiss rejection cause there could be multiple reasons for it but at the same time that made me think more about the friend zone possibility. \n\nAny advice or similar situations and how you solved the problem would be smashing! Thanks in advance.", "summary": "Started going out with a girl I liked. Feelings were obviously mutual. Took it slow due to exams. Not sure now if she is feeling the same way I am."}
{"id": "t3_1wfhbj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23F) am an introvert and my husband (27M) of 5 years is stressing me out (x-post /r/introvert)", "post": "I was told to post this here, as it seems to be more of a \"relationship\" thing than an \"introvert\" thing. [Here] is the original thread.\n\nI am extremely introverted. I've known this most of my life. It's who I am, and I'm okay with it. However, my husband doesn't seem to understand/respect my needs at all. He can't wrap his head around the fact that I NEED to be left completely alone sometimes. He doesn't understand why I cringe into a ball and scream \"don't touch me!\" after a long day of working at my call center job. He thinks it's \"cute\" when I ask to be left alone when he insists on grabbing, hugging, kissing, etc. on me, and is highly amused the more anxious/aggravated I get. I have tried explaining to him on multiple occasions exactly how I feel, what my needs are, and why I need them, but he seems to just completely ignore it. I have no idea how to get it through his head.\nEverything in my life seems to exhaust me. My husband, my needy four-year-old (okay, yes, I know this can't be helped), and my idiotic idea to take a job in a call center, where I literally cringe at each phone call that comes through. I'm wondering if anyone has any advice as to how to help my situation. Any feedback would be appreciated.", "summary": "my husband doesn't respect my space and needs, he's a jerk about it, and I have no idea what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1zocia", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[29m] The love of my life [25 F] moving across the world, starting a job at my company (7 months)", "post": "The person I think of as the love of my life and the \"one\" is moving here from Europe tomorrow. She'll also be working at the same company as me. I've been here over a year and met last summer when she was an intern at another office we have.\n\nPeople at my company have no idea that we've had anything going on these last few months. When we first met we were both in relationships and have moved on from those because of the feelings we have for each other.\n\nI'd never even had a workplace romance before this, let alone relationship, and could really use some advice on what to expect, how to maintain those boundaries between work and dating life, and any other stuff you knowledgable people can add. I know it can be tough and constraining to be new to a city and in a relationship as well.\n\nI'm nervous about how intensely strong the feelings I have for her are, and the feelings are definitely mutual. We've had issues (dragging each other into our infidentlities) and I really don't want to screw this second chance up. The working together thing seems like a good obstacle to start thinking about.", "summary": "The love of my life is moving across the world, and working at the same company as me. Does anyone have any advice for navigating workplace relationships or having a SO that's new to the city?"}
{"id": "t3_pq8em", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help with Wife", "post": "My wife and I have found ourselves in a bit of a funk.  In the past few years we have had 5 deaths in our families (including immediate), we have been homeless due to our apartment complex going under the day we were supposed to move in, and just other rough things of this sort.  That being said, we both love each other dearly, we have simply been stuck in a state of surviving and making it through to the next day that we have forgotten how to enjoy life.  The problem is that we are both in our own little worlds when it comes to having fun, but only come together during the bad times.\n\nI have been trying to reach out and do more things that she loves and encourage her to explore the things she enjoys, and we have.  She states that she wants to do things that I enjoy, but anytime it comes to actually doing my activity, she finds a reason not to (i.e. she is too tired) and she blames me for the poor timing of what I want to do.  \n\nSome of the things I love: hiking, backpacking, camping, rock climbing, any kind of sport, board games (from monopoly to axis and allies to dominion), any kind of videogame, puzzles, watching action/suspense/scary movies, going on spontaneous dates, doing crazy random things just to see what happens (that won't hurt people), or anything random I guess.  I just enjoy breaking up the monotony of schedule and rigor.", "summary": "How can my wife and I learn how to enjoy doing fun things again?  What are some ideas I can use to incorporate doing things I really love and not just things she enjoys?"}
{"id": "t3_4ixzyk", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [18M] am confused and don't know how to proceed. Situation involving an ex[18F].", "post": "I am currently still seeing my ex [18F]. We've shifted to being FWB, but she's also seeing other guys. The thought of her being with other guys bothers me. \n\nThe semester is about to finish and I should be prioritizing my academic career. This situation has been infiltrating my mind constantly; feelings of anger, regret, lust? and jealousy? come about. My focus towards school as a result is affected.\n\nShe's been very open and honest about it when I ask questions. Most of the time when she tells me these things, I get a feeling of grief in my chest. I am fairly attracted to her; I am borderline addicted, perhaps because of the sex.\n\nWhat is the best course of action here? I'd like to keep seeing her; the sex is fun. With time, will I get over it? Summer is coming so I'll be working and hanging out with friends. I'm definitely going to try to my chances with some girls. Should i cut her off? If I do, is it because of my feelings? With a logical POV, should I? Because if i'm going to get over it with time, I should continue to have enjoy myself because it is possible.\n\nI might be delusional. I don't know lol. This is why i need your advice. You will save me a lot of grief. I don't have enough experience in this world to deal with this situation. I want to make the best decision here.\n\nAll replies are greatly appreciated. Thanks!", "summary": "I am still seeing my ex; she's seeing other guys. This causes me grief. I need advice on how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_4csyte", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my crush [21 F]. She likes me back. But ever since I broke up with my GF, she acts different.", "post": "So me and my GF of 4 years were destined to break up for a while, I just wasn't sure how to do it. Then one day I find out that one of my good friends (who I have a major crush on) likes me, and she knows I like her back. This helped things along and I broke up with my GF a week ago.\n\nAnyways, since then, she doesn't seem the same. We don't seem to flirt and talk as much as we used to. She told me that I need to figure my stuff out, and she needs to focus on exams (which are 2.5 weeks away), and doesn't want to talk about it until after.\n\nWell, I had to figure a way to hang out with her, so I asked if we could study together, and she said yes. So now, we are going to study after class on Friday at 2:00pm. **What are some ways you can flirt with a girl when you're in a classroom all by yourselves? She is the type that moves slow so I will not be making any moves or anything!**\n\nNow here is my question. We are only going to be away from home for about 3 more weeks. I would like to take advantage of this and invite her over (she has come over a few times before, just as friends). **Do you think its reasonable for me to ask her to watch a movie at my house after we study on Friday? Or should I give her more space?", "summary": "Girl likes me, I like her. Just broke up with GF a little while ago. She wants to move slow. Should I ask her over to my place for a movie?"}
{"id": "t3_2p8k4d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26F] fianc\u00e9e of a two year old long relationship hit me [21M] in the face again.", "post": "This is not the first time it happens. I posted about what happened 6 months ago here: (She hit me a couple of times in the face without glasses)\n\nWe got back, and two months ago we had a fight, where it ended up with me throwing her phone to the wall, and grabbing her by her arms, and throwing her into bed leaving her upper arms bruised. I did not hit her.\n\nYesterday we got into an argument and she repeatedly hit me in the face, I hugged her, she stooped. She wanted to leave I didn't want her to, then she kept hitting me and I slapped her. Then she realized she left me my face bruised up and a bleeding nose and she was very sorry.\n\nthere was alcohol involved in all of this fights.\n\nLater on today, she has been asking me to go and see her.\nNow that I type this, this relationship looks like a mess, but we love each other a lot. thanks!", "summary": "6 months ago she hits me, 2 months ago I grab her by her arms and leave them bruised up because of me, yesterday she left me a bruised face and a bleeding nose."}
{"id": "t3_39qu26", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by causing a post office to have a rotten potato", "post": "I few days ago, I saw on the internet that apparently there are a bunch of weird things that can be sent through the USPS. My grandma is kind of an odd little duck, so I decided to try and mail a potato to her. I decided to take one of the smaller, baby potatoes that is light enough to meet the weight limit for a single stamp but big enough to fit the stamp and a small message. So I get the potato, attach the stamp and the messages \"Betcha didn't know you could mail a potato! -ziegzag\" & \"P.S. plz don't eat this potato\" (also the thing is covered in tape to make them stick). I dropped it off at my local post office and wait for the results. \n\nFive days later, my grandma comes over for dinner and starts to tell my mom about how the post office called and said they're holding a small package that they couldn't deliver, blah blah blah. My grandma proceeds to tell that she drove all over her neighborhood chasing her mailman, only for him to say that there is a small package rotting at the post office & that he can deliver it if she wants it. She didn't know I had mailed her a potato and was utterly confused, until my mom told her that I mailed her a potato. Flash forward to about 15 minutes ago and my grandma says \"Out of all people I wasn't expecting ziegzag to send me a potato!\", I replied \"Well who else would send you a potato?\". Sorry SPB post office.", "summary": "mailed a potato to my grandma, caused a mild wild goose chase, and the local post office now has a rotting potato."}
{"id": "t3_3k8tmm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] and the girl I'm dating [18 F], have begun a semi long-distance type relationship because of school and I'm a little worried?", "post": "First off she doesn't go to school that far, only a couple hours away. We talked and she said that she wants to continue our relationship even when she left for school. What worries me is that it is a party school and although I feel like I can trust her to not cheat, it's just something that I can't help, but think about. It doesn't help that she told me a guy tried to hook up with her at a party the first day she was there. \n\nWe haven't been dating for a long time, just a couple months and I do like her. My friends have been telling me to have girls in mind to move on with, if she does cheat, but I don't feel like i can do that. \n\nI'm also in school, so I don't know how often I would be able to visit her or if her residence allows visitors. She said she would come back to visit relatively often, but still it's something you can't help but think about.\n\nAnyways, I was wondering if I should break it off with her (At least for a while), so she can have her freedom to have fun at school or try to stay together. And what should I do, if she does cheat on me. Am I just being paranoid?", "summary": "Girl I'm dating went away for school, but still wanted to continue our relationship. Trust her, even though I can't help but wonder if she will cheat on me. what do? Also am i just being paranoid?"}
{"id": "t3_nsub8", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Apologizing to an ex...", "post": "I dated a guy for about 13 or 14 months a little under a year ago (we were 21 and 22 at the time); I broke up with him February of this year. Since then, I have undergone massive personal change, to the point that I almost feel like a completely different person than who I was when I dated him. \n\nThe relationship was very emotional right off the bat, as I was only a month out of a nearly 5 year long abusive relationship. He remains the nicest guy I have met to date, and he helped me and supported me as I went through dealing with my issues left over from the abusive relationship. I was his first real, long term girlfriend. We ended up living together that summer, and also spent three and a half months traveling through Australia with his friend and his friend's sister. During our relationship we talked about children and marriage, and I found myself thinking about looking at rings and him proposing.\n\nI made a lot of promises to him that I shouldn't have, because throughout the entire relationship I always knew in the back of my mind it wouldn't be forever. He would voice his fear that I would leave him during or after our trip to Australia, and I, without hesitation, promised him I wouldn't. I know I absolutely devastated him when I ended the relationship.\n\nNow, in my new place in life, I feel like I owe him an apology. I know I used him as a very drawn-out rebound, reveling in the security and love he provided. I feel like I should own up to the pain I caused him, and I want to wish him well. \n\nIs this a good idea? Should I let sleeping dogs lie? He and his best friend (our travel buddy) only recently deleted me from facebook - up until November we still retained that modicum of contact. Since finding out he deleted me, I've found myself thinking often of the hurt I caused him, and I legitimately hope he is happy now. I have no idea what kind of person he is now and I haven't seen him since the break up, so I don't know how any contact from me would be received.", "summary": "should I apologize to my ex for essentially using him as a rebound, promising him some kind of future and then breaking his heart?"}
{"id": "t3_y032c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit can you turn me from John Candy into man candy?", "post": "I'm not looking for some get-ripped-quick scheme. I genuinely want to lose weight through hard work and dicipline, I just don't know what I'm doing. I'm tired of being the lazy asshole I have been for all twenty years I've been alive. So I was hoping reddit could help turn me from a lazy asshole I to just an asshole. \n\nHere is a little bit of information about me to hopefully help out. I will be twenty year old as of October 1st, I am 6' tall and about 230 pound of silly putty and hair. But don't get me wrong, I don't look like a walking beanbag chair. I have a bit of fat that need to be cut and I don't think a butcher can help. Overall I resemble a young John Goodman (so I've been told). I've downloaded an app to help keep track of the calories I eat (it has helped me lose about 12 pounds so far) and I work 60+ hours a week which requires me to be constantly moving and lifting heavy objects. \n\nI guess what I'm asking is do any I you know any beginner work out routines or tips I could attempt to lose weight? Even any mind games I could use on myself to help me avoid bad food and such.", "summary": "Guy who looks like the \"Before\" pictures in weight lose commercials is asking how to cut his gut using your badass weight lose skills."}
{"id": "t3_1azgga", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend [24f] gave me [24f] an entertainment center years ago, and now that she is moving she is demanding it back.", "post": "About four years ago, my friend was moving out of her apartment into her parents house and needed to get rid of some furniture she couldn't take with her. One of these things was her grandfather's entertainment center. She asked me if I wanted it, I said sure. I rented a truck, enlisted some help to help me move it, then moved it to a storage unit for three months until I had an apartment big enough to house it. Now, I am back with living my parents and have since given the unit to them. It houses family pictures, the main living room tv, and all of the electronics.\n\nNow, my friend is moving to her own place again, and has been demanding that I return her \"family's furniture\" to her. She has even gotten her boyfriend (whom I work with) to harass me over it too. She is now saying that she never gave it to me, that it was only for me to use until she needed it again. Her boyfriend is saying that they shouldn't even have to ask, that my parents can afford to buy their own furniture, and that it's not my property. \n\nI am totally floored by this. There was never ANY mention of just having me \"borrow\" it until they would need it, even if it was YEARS later. Why would I pay all of that money to have it stored and moved if I knew they were going to take it back? Am I in the wrong here?", "summary": "Friend gave me entertainment center years ago, now that it's convenient for her she wants it back saying it is rightfully her family's and not mine."}
{"id": "t3_2tz2la", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by leaving my phone unlocked", "post": "I live in a college suite of six guys, all of whom I trust and get along with greatly, so greatly in fact, that I leave my phone unlocked and lying around like an idiot. My roommate, AZ, recently got nudes from some girl he's interested in and showed them to us. Which is great! On a side note, it is important to the story to know that I hooked up with her last semester, not to AZ's knowledge. \n\nToday, I get a series of messages from AZ, asking why I sent myself nudes of this girl from his phone and ipad. It is worth noting, that I, did not in fact do this. I double checked my phone: No nudes. I inform him, and send him screenshots of my gallery, which is a barren wasteland of no tits or ass. He gets back to the dorm, and shows me his ipad (which he also leaves unlocked apparently) and his phone. On his phone, our messages clearly indicate that someone sent me nudes at some point in time. On his ipad, the evidence is deleted. I show him my phone, and he does not believe me, which is reasonable. \n\nMy personal theory is that someone sent them on his ipad, deleted the pictures on my phone, and then deleted the messages on the ipad, knowing he would still have the imessage on his phone, and making it look like I tried to delete them. The rest of my suitemates, knowing I hooked up with her, are now also suspicious, and now I'm the scumbag of my suite with no way to prove my innocence.", "summary": "Someone sent me titty pics on a friends phone and set me up to look like I was the culprit. I'm now in the middle of a giant sexting conspiracy."}
{"id": "t3_sxgtt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Now ex-boyfriend says he can't handle a long distance relationship.", "post": "So my SO and I started dating a year+ ago. We're both attend A&M, except he is graduating in a few weeks and is moving to Houston, which is just an hour away, to work. I still have two more years of college left. He broke up with me because he feels like he can't handle the long distance.\n\nBackground information: \n\nHe's graduating with a petroleum engineer degree. His job will require him to travel to oil rigs during his training until he finally gets settled into an office in Houston, which may take six months to two years. He's living with his parent during this time.\n\nHe says during his freshmen year, he tried a long distance relationship with his high school girlfriend, but it didn't work. (Again, it was about an hour and a half away.) During last summer, he was working as an intern while I went to summer school. He almost broke up with me then because of the distance (this probably should've forshadowed what is going on now.) \n\nIs there anyway I could convince him that we could make it work? We still love each other and it would be such a shame to just throw this relationship away like that.", "summary": "Can /r/relationships give my boyfriend advice about going through a not so very long distance relationship? What can I say to reassure him?"}
{"id": "t3_4xkxb7", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by leaving my number for a server and not tipping", "post": "About a week ago I went to my favorite sports bar here in Arizona. It's self-seating so my buddies and I sit down at a table near the back of the bar. Our server, a girl, call her J comes over, cute, short girl, takes our orders and walks away. I lean over to my buddy and tell him she was cute and that I think I'm gonna leave my number. Fast forward through awkward flirting and such while we eat and drink for about an hour, checks come, I leave her a note saying I thought she was cute and that I would love to buy her a drink sometime with my number.\n\nYesterday I went back to that sports bar after I hadn't heard from her. Different group of people but turns out she is our server again. She says she remembers me so I call her by her name and have a good meal. This time when the checks came, I grabbed my card and I shut my book. This morning when I woke up, I realized I forgot to fill out the tip portion of my bill. I am a server and now she probably thinks I didn't tip because she didn't text me.", "summary": "Left my number for a server, came back a week later without hearing from her and had the same server, forgot to tip."}
{"id": "t3_13hrv5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25/m]Needs assistance not being so awkward, story inside (23/f)", "post": "So, here we go. I am kicking myself hardcore, and I really need to stop being so fucking awkward in relationship scenarios.\n\nThe other night I had a little party and had some friends over, and they brought one of their friends. Very cute girl, we have talked a few times prior to party night, and we seem to be fairly comparable. So I am pretty excited that she will be coming over. We had made plans to hang out a few times previously, and things kept popping up that made us change the day of our hang outs. \n\nWell, the night progresses, and much liquor is consumed. People are getting ready for bed, and picking their spots to pass out/sleep, and some how she and I are in my bed with some crappy TV show on. Shes 99% naked as am I, and I froze. Completely froze, did not do anything, didnt make a move, didnt even hint at anything. Just layed there staring at the TV with this mostly naked girl in my bed.\n\nNothing ended up happening, but we do have plans to hang out at her place again fairly soon, and I need help. I need to not be that dumbass again and just sit there with my thumb in my bum, but for some reason I couldnt do anything to stop myself from being super awkward, and I fear that it will happen again next time we see each other. \n\nI think the majority of my nervousness came from not wanting to say something stupid, Ive been in 2 LTR my entire life (totaling about 10 years combined), and its been easily 10 years since Ive been in the early stages of dating, and I am terrified that I will say/do something retarded and scare this girl away.\n\nNot quite sure if this is even the place to post this, but I couldnt think of anyplace better so here it is. I am a bit drunk as I type this so if it doesnt make sense, please spare me.", "summary": "Fucked up a fun time with new girl, and would like advice on how to not be a dweeb anymore."}
{"id": "t3_coc6k", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Best ways to mess with the credit card companies' postage paid envelopes?", "post": "I'm sure that this has been discussed a thousand times, but let's have another go at it.\n\nI pay off my CCs each month, have good credit, blah blah blah.\n\nHowever, I'm feeling mischievous and annoyed at Chase, which sends me 2-3 CC applications a week.  Shredding them is a PITA, and just mailing random junk back in the postage-paid envelopes is getting old.\n\nI know that this is childish, bad karma, etc etc, but I'd like to mess with the CC companies (though I know that the people dealing with the fallout will be the poor $8/hour employees in the mail center).  That being said, my requirements are that such messing with the CCs be:\na) **Legal**\nb) **Quick** (under 20 secs per CC offer)\nc) **Cheap and easy** on my part (no bricks- too much heavy lifting, and the post office makes you ship packages over 13 oz in person in any event)\nd) **Safe and sanitary** (no rotting meat or dog crap in the mail, for example)\n\nI know that major companies use automatic machines to cut open envelopes, remove the contents, etc, and I've heard that a healthy dose of glitter will gum these machines up (sounds logical to me).  That's my best idea so far.\n\nAlso, if any one has any practical ways to use CC offers (I'd use them to heat my home, for example, but I lack a fireplace, and the envelopes aren't blank on the back, so I can't use them for shopping lists), I'd love to hear them.  Shredding them and using them for animal bedding (\"My hamster shits on your puny offer, Chase!\") would be great if I had pets.", "summary": "What's the best (easy, safe, legal, cheap) and/or most creative way to use credit card postage paid envelopes to have some fun?"}
{"id": "t3_xx65m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I no longer have romantic feelings for my girlfriend of over a year and I'm not sure what I should do. Help? Myself M[19] her F[19]", "post": "To start off we have been dating for around 14 months and the vast majority of that time has been great. Obviously we have had ups and downs like most relationships but nothing too serious or deal-breaking. She is one of the nicest most caring people I have ever met and she has always been a ton of fun to be around. \n\nThe issue is that over the last couple months I have basically lost all interest in a romantic relationship with her. It's not anything that she has done specifically I just do not have the same feelings I once had. I have been strongly considering ending things but I am having an extremely hard time doing it because I still care about her and would never want to hurt her, but I know that no matter what I do I'm going to. \n\nEvery other time that I have ended a relationship it has been over a significant unresolvable issue such as cheating. I am completely unsure how to move forward right now.\n\n What should I do?? Any advice would be much appreciated.", "summary": "Have basically lost all romantic feelings for girlfriend but I still care about her and am unsure on how I should end things and let her down easily or if I should even break up with her right now."}
{"id": "t3_4yrgq0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By getting really high and laughing uncontrollably at the worst possible time during my aunts' story.", "post": "This happened last night. So we have a family gathering at our grandparents place every summer, my cousins smoke a lot of weed and hash and we were smoking most of the night out in their tent. About 1am rolls around and we go inside for some snacks. Sure enough there's my aunt in the kitchen and she starts telling a story and it is really hard to hang on because we are all so blazed. I dont know how she didn't notice but about 5 minutes in I look over at my two cousins and they haven't blinked, their eyes are so red and they're making the exact same face while they listen to her story. At this point I can't contain my laughter at the situation and I burst out laughing. Just as I'm laughing my aunt says how someone in her story lost her husband to cancer. She paused for a long time and gave me the weirdest look, the room went very silent. It really sounded like I was laughing about it and I quickly followed it up by saying I wasn't laughing about that and that I just had a funny thought. She then left rather quietly. I still don't think she knows how high we were and she hasn't said a word to me since last night.", "summary": "Absolutely blazed, had a laughing attack while my Aunt was telling us about one of her friends husbands dying of cancer."}
{"id": "t3_3kzv8k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [38 M] with my wife [40 F] 20 years together, 6 abortions.", "post": "My wife and I have been together for 20 years and we are childfree. My wife has had 6 abortions in the years we have been together. I am staunchly pro-choice. But even I think that 6 abortions is excessive. It's an unnecessary expense, and also a *medical procedure* that comes with risks. I know that birth control fails sometimes, but my wife is very irresponsible about birth control in general. \n\nWe use condoms usually but she is often forgetful about taking her birth control. The first two times were just mistakes. We had unprotected sex and the other was after a night of drinking and partying. Both times we forgot to use condoms. The third time we were very careful about using birth control. Or at least, *I* was. She said she stopped taking her pills because she wanted to lose 10 lbs before we went for our vacation in Perth\u2026and she didn't even tell me. \n\nI'm not sure if she takes her birth control at the same time every day, because I trust her to and checking everyday seems controlling and unnecessary to me. Since then, we have had three more unexpected pregnancies. \n\nI have brought up getting a vasectomy but she said she doesn't want me to get one. Tubal ligation? She also refused that as she doesn't want to go for elective surgery. IUD? No, she doesn't want anything invasive or anything stuck on her uterus. She doesn't want to try other, possibly more effective forms of birth control like the Depo shot. \n\nI'm seriously getting really annoyed at this point. I definitely support her choice to terminate the pregnancy 100% but I think it could be prevented if she would be more responsible about taking her pills. Should I just go ahead and get a vasectomy without her consent? How can I convince her to try other birth control methods that won't be affected by her forgetfulness or wanting to lose 10 lbs? My wife says 6 abortions in 20 years is nothing and I'm overreacting. Am I? this is so frustrating especially since she is generally very mature and responsible in other areas.", "summary": "Wife doesn't take birth control seriously. How to convince her to try other forms of bc? Am I overreacting to 6 abortions in 20 years? "}
{"id": "t3_2nxbny", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] have a girlfriend [20 F] of 2.5 years, that doesn't want to kiss or have sex", "post": "I don't want to sound like typical i-wanna-sex-guy. Me and my girlfriend are together for about 2.5 years and most of it was very long distance relationship. We love each other, i can confirm that, but i feel like something is wrong. \n\nI was poor as hell and we couldn't meet each other very often. First it was one time a week for a whole day. Later on when i was even more far away to visit her i needed to pay for a place to sleep, train and in my country it was very expensive for me.\n\nBut let's back to the problem. In the whole relationship i kissed her only ONCE, while she always want to cuddle/hug/look at me. While we slept together, she had only pants on her so it was even more provoking. She likes to talk about sex, she isn't shy at all and i'm her first boyfriend ever. But everytime i want to delicate touch her in private parts or just kiss her after few hours of cuddling, she just tells \"i dont want to\" and move her head. I'm not forcing anything, just trying slowly every .. month? \n\nI'm the guy that is happy with just giving her pleasure but i feel so unatractive at the moment that sometimes i don't even want to meet her to avoid that. I tried to talk about it, but she is completely silent and waits with a sad face. She didn't had any problems with it in past that could block her.\n\nRecently after so much hard work i moved out close to her. Thought that she don't wanna start till that day, but nothing changed. Am i a bad guy that want sex and can't deal with it? I just can't break up with her after everything we gone through :(", "summary": "After 2.5 years my girlfriend still doesn't want to kiss or have sex (and even talk about it) and it's very hard for me."}
{"id": "t3_4h8zye", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "How to respond to a job offer from your employer if you have an interview scheduled in a week with the company you really want to work for.", "post": "Hello fellow redditors,\n\nI am currently working for company A on a temporary contract basis which expires May 9th 2016. As I did not hear any offers from them I started my job search and got 2 interviews lined up (companies B and C). One of the interviews is with a company B which is a company I really want to work for but unfortunately they can only interview me this Friday. My current employer suddenly \"woke up\" at the end of last week and asked me to stay on a permanent basis with the same salary as before. I politely declined his offer because I know I can find a better deal elsewhere.\n\nThe next day company A asked me what's the minimum salary I would accept and I shot a number at them which I thought they would not accept (this company is a little bit cheap with its employees). To my surprise they told me that they are trying to negotiate with the higher management and will let me know their final decision tomorrow. I am also supposed to hear from company C tomorrow but that company apparently does not have any benefits so I would not be interested in working there. \n\nWhat should I do if company A will accept my counter offer? Should I be honest and tell them that I am waiting to hear from a company of my first choice? I really want to be as professional as possible and leave on good terms. There are number of things I don't like about company A such as location, organizational structure so I am really ready to leave but of course if I don't get an offer from company B then it would make sense to stay here at least for now.", "summary": "Might get an offer tomorrow from my current employer to stay permanently with them, have an interview scheduled for my dream job only next Friday. How to politely and professionally deal with my employer while I wait for a response from my dream job?"}
{"id": "t3_34wblv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] am a student with my BF [24M] of 2 months who has a job. How do we go about paying for dates?", "post": "My BF makes about 1k after tax each week, while I am a broke college student. I can't work since I'm an international student. He often suggests eating out and our meals usually cost $20-30, tips included (which is one hour of work for him). He always asks for one check and pays for the meal. I always go to his place for the weekend because my dorm room is super small, so we don't cook and just eat out maybe three times over the weekend.\n\nI feel bad about letting him pay but I can't afford dinner for two so sometimes I buy him a drink or get movie tickets. I still feel bad about him paying for almost everything so how do I go about this? Should I just let him pay (he doesn't seem to mind at all but it bothers me. I don't want to be a gold-digger)? Please give me some suggestion! \n\nHe also paid for everything (dinner and drinks) on our first date, even though I said I'd buy him a drink since he already got dinner. He's really nice and I don't want him to do all the work in this relationship. Any comments, advice and suggestion would be appreciated!", "summary": "Boyfriend pays for almost everything and doesn't seem to mind. I'm a broke college student. How do I contribute to the relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_30bykw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by missing obvious signs", "post": "So im a cashier at a grocery store, and normally while on register you dont really see too much, ill get the occasional middle aged woman that calls me cute, or a hottie will come through my line, but other than that not much. A few days ago I was working and it was probably 5 minutes before closing time. I was on register ringing up the 2nd to last customer in the store. I start with the usual auto pilot questions (\"Hi, did you find every thing okay\") and blabity blah. She had a bunch of vegan cupcakes that we make in the store and stuff so I asked her what the occasion was, she said her birthday was coming up. And then I proceeded to do the thing that you never do which is guess a womans age, luckily I guessed low. Im 18, I guessed she was 20, even though i thought she looked a bit older but i wasnt trying to get slapped. She told me she was 22. I asked if she was in grad school. She said no shes done with school for now, her major was law. \n\nas we started talking more I brought up how being 18 and not in college SUCKS for meeting girls. My last girlfriend was 22 and broke up with me because of my age. She went on to say \"age only bothers some women, I like you and your age doesnt bother me at all\"\n\"want to help me celebrate my birthday\".... \n\nBeing a cashier has made me very oblivious to women (not that i wasnt already)\n\nI said \"COOL, would you like a receipt?\"\n\nShe just kinda looked at me dissapointed and took it, and she started walking away. At this point one of my male friend co workers taps me on the shoulder and says \"dude are you stupid? go get her number, she was into you\". And then everything she said finally clicked in my head and I call her back in and give her my number on a piece of paper. She smiled and left", "summary": "Cashier at grocery store, girl im ringing up hits on me, I miss all of it and let her leave. friend saves me and i went and gave her my phone number"}
{"id": "t3_2xzm0r", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Does my dog just miss me?", "post": "I've got a lab and German sheppard mixed pup. He's around a year and a few months and I've had him since he was about 3 months old.\n\nI just video chatted with my sister and he looks pretty mopey. They were telling me that he's uninterested in his peanut butter filled Kong and hasn't been eating much. My sister says he's been panting heavily and threw up yesterday. They don't think he's eaten anything unusual lately, but seems to be getting worse every day.\n\nI've been out of town to open a new store for 2 and a half weeks now and have about a week and a half before I can go home. Could it be that he just misses me? We opted to leave him home because he doesn't like car rides. We figured he'd be more comfortable at home with my grandparents than here in a cage while we're working.\n\nMost importantly, is there anything I can do that'll help?", "summary": "my dog is sick and acting mopey. I've been gone for 2 and a half weeks. Is it because he misses me? What can I do to help?"}
{"id": "t3_1hxcz6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/m] I cant get this girl (19/f) out of my head, even though I love my girlfriend (19/f), what should I do?", "post": "So here's my story, I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about 10 months now, before I met her I was lovestruck with this one girl, I tried to get het for about 6 months but I'm shy as fuck and so it didn't happen. So I met my now girlfriend, totally fell in love with her. She's really great. As you can imagine i havn't thought about the other girl for a pretty long time, until about 4 months ago, I saw her at a party and we talked for a while had good laugh and so on. Since then I think of her more and more, saw her a few other times. Now I can't get her out of my head, I dream about her I think about her, I often just randomly go to her facebook page just to look at her face. Now the thing that scares me the most, the last 2 times when I slept at my girlfriends place i dreamt of her while sleeping with my girlfriend in my arms. \n\nThat's pretty much it, I just really don't know what to do.\n\nBy the way the other girls has a boyfriend, but it's always very flirty when we see each other and we just ramdomly smile at each other.", "summary": "I have a girlfriend which I love but I'm constatnly thinking about a girl I've had feeling for before I met my girlfriend."}
{"id": "t3_j4q1c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Gay men of reddit: Am I a bigot?", "post": "I'm not using a throwaway, and I'll attempt to be as honest as I can. I'm a straight man, 26, and I've never considered myself prejudiced at all. But in the last couple of months I've come to a startling realization. \n\nGay men annoy me. \n\nIt's not hate, or discomfort. I'm against hate in any form, assuming a particular person hasn't done something to rouse my ire. I support gay marriage and consider myself an LGBT ally. I've had a lot of close gay friends - mostly through theatre - and I've kissed guys full on the lips in front of packed auditoriums 5 days a week without trepidation. As for lesbians, well, I get along better with them than with almost anyone else. I like hanging out with women, and when you take the whole \"are we gonna bang?\" tension out of the picture it's relaxing as can be.\n\nIt's not the being gay that annoys me. It's the acting gay - acting *really* gay. Everyone knows what I'm talking about. It just seems disingenuous when someone's being as flamboyant as possible. I can understand it when someone's just coming out and feels the need to express their sexual identity, or in a pride parade - go wild, I say. \n\nBut when I see adult men acting like total queens, I just want to tell them to grow the hell up. It feels the same as some good old boy chugging whiskey on his four wheeler wearing a Nascar hat and waving old glory on his way down to the still. Immature posturing. Blegh.\n\n**BUT.** I could totally be in the wrong here. I might just be an asshole. This bothers me. I've always tried to believe that people should be free to express themselves however they choose. I hope it's not the case, but are my feelings here prejudice? And, have you encountered this IRL? How do you feel about it? All love and respect to you, even if you hate me.", "summary": "I feel that overt flamboyance by gay men in everyday life is dishonest tomfoolery. Am I a bigot?"}
{"id": "t3_vhq3p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, Would you still have kids if you have a genetic disorder or ailment that can be passed hereditarily?", "post": "I have suffered from major depression and severe ADHD, among many other things my entire life, although they now think it might be Bipolar type II. There is a very strong presence of Mental Illness ranging from Depression, Schizophrenia, and OCD in my family as well as a lot of drug/alcohol abuse and dependence. \n\nI have a handle on my life, and have become good at knowing how to help control my own mental state. My ex-girlfriend had talked to me about having kids, and I told her that I would think about adopting, but explained my gene-pool, and how most things like depression and alcoholism are thought to have a genetic predisposition. And that I wouldn't want to roll the dice on my child's life, chancing giving them severe depression or some other mental illness. Her desire to actually have a baby with me, is what led to us breaking up.", "summary": "I have severe Depression and ADHD, and come from a terrible gene pool. The GF wanted to have a kid, I didn't want to risk passing my bad genes to my child, but would consider adopting."}
{"id": "t3_aov94", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How the hell do universities get away with selling new editions of \"first year\" calculus (or any math) textbooks every year?", "post": "Every year my university sells new editions of textbooks for \"first year\" calculus courses, and pays nearly nothing for the return of last year's books. This is completely ridiculous, the material is not changing, and the curriculum definitely is not changing fast enough to warrant the sale of a new edition every year.\n\nI used my father's late '70s calculus textbook for my first calculus course, and it was perfectly sufficient. And, given the fact that most professors do not use questions from the textbook for assignments (at least at my university), I just don't see the need for having all these new editions.\n\n- I'm assuming this happens at every academic institution, or am I wrong about this?\n- Are the publishers/universities/professors doing this solely to make money; is there some other justifiable reason?\n- Am I missing something here?\n- What do you think about this?\n\nNote: I understand the reasons for new editions every couple of years: to correct mistakes, add relevant examples, include sections on Maple/Matlab, etc., but again, it's the fact that it's every year that \"grinds my gears\".", "summary": "Universities (mine in particular) sell new editions of first year math books every year despite the material and curriculum remaining the same. I think it's bullshit. What do you think?"}
{"id": "t3_vji6b", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Can't stop worrying about potential break up and it's interfering with my daily life. (x-post r/relationships)", "post": "I (22 F) have been with my boyfriend (20 M) for about a year.\n\nRecently, we have been talking and he is starting to feel emotionless (says he can't control it and doesn't know anything that will help make it go away) and told me he wants to give our relationship some time to see if things can improve before we end up breaking up.\n\nEver since we've had this talk (about a week ago), I have been feeling very out-of-sorts. I have put a lot of effort into this relationship and I love him and don't want to end it. I can't help but be paranoid all the time that he is going to break up with me and worry about our relationship.\n\nSo I ask, first: what are some things that he can do to avoid losing all emotions and become (basically) a hermit, and then end up shutting me out of his life? Second: How can I stop worrying that this is definitely going to happen? I literally can't stop thinking about it and it has been interfering with my daily life. I find myself feeling nauseous, don't want to eat, getting headaches, and even just breaking down and crying.\n\nI don't want to feel this way anymore but I don't want to lose him either. It won't make me feel any better to end it with him. I truly think he is something special and we have never had any major problems in our relationship.... Please help!", "summary": "Boyfriend of a year is shutting me out accidentally and wants to see where the relationship goes before breaking up. I can't stop worrying and it is making me sick. I want to help him but I don't want to lose him"}
{"id": "t3_3cxivi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] with my husband [28 M] of two years, together for 5 years, looking for advice - how to continue to be monogamous in my marriage after discovering I am polyamorous [x-post from r/polyamory]", "post": "First time posting here and I'm just looking for some advice or tips about how to healthily move forward in my situation. \n\nI've been with my husband for five years and recently have realized that I am polyamorous. I say recently realized, because it was only during the last few months that I found out there was a word for how I feel, and communities that successfully participate in various degrees of polyamorous relationships, although I've had polyamorous feelings since I was a teenager.\n\nOn the one hand I feel so happy and excited to discover there are others out there who feel the same way about love, sex and relationships that I do! On the other more realistic hand, I feel devastated that when I approached my husband with my thoughts and feelings regarding opening our relationship, he reacted very badly and is firmly, unwaveringly monogamous to the point of saying that the thought of sharing me makes him feel physically sick. \n\nI do not blame him or begrudge him for how he feels, I realize he is entirely justified in his feelings and I threw him a massive curveball with this. I was surprised at his extreme reaction, I thought we were a little more experimental, but we are committed to working things through in marriage therapy together. \n\nI love my husband very deeply and love the life we have built together. We have a very healthy and strong relationship. I have committed to being mono with him compared to being poly without him. I'm just feeling a little lost as to how to 'suppress' this side of myself that I was initially excited to discover, and which makes so much sense to me, for the sake of my marriage. Any words of wisdom would be much appreciated!", "summary": "In a monogamous marriage but have recently discovered I am polyamorous. Husband is firmly not. Want to stay together and willing to be mono for him, how do I move past these polyamorous feelings?"}
{"id": "t3_4v4fjq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (19M) girlfriend (19F) hung out with a guy once, apparently he's the \"the most perfect person\", and now he keeps being brought up all the time. Is she cheating on me?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for two years now. We're in a long distance relationship because of college, about a 20 hour train ride apart from one another. \n\nA couple months ago she was invited to hang out with this guy by her friend, because her friend didn't want to be alone with him. They meet, go to the beach, get dinner, walk around, and, supposedly, have an amazing time. When she tells me about it, she won't stop going on and on about how great he is, how she never thought she'd be friends with someone as positive and perfect as him, how he seems out of her league (\"in friendship\"), he reminds her of me, and basically never ending praise. \n\nThe reason they haven't hung out since is because school was ending in a week and he is taking the next semester off. She supposedly doesn't have his phone number or any other way to communicate with him, and he lives in another state. But I know nothing else about him other than all the great things she's told me. Normally when she talks about her close friends she's not this excited, she's never spoken this highly of any of her friends before, only me. \n\nSince she's brought him up, we talk about him a lot. I'll jokingly accuse her of cheating, and she'll laugh and deny it, but I'm never quite confident in her response. She'll also jokingly bring up that she's cheating with him.  But this kind of thing happens multiple times a day, almost everyday.  We're both each others first relationships and talk about how we'd never cheat or do anything like that, but the only other person she gives as much praise to is myself. And even then I feel like she's talked better about him, she's never said anything bad. Do I have to worry?", "summary": "girlfriend hung out with this guy one time, apparently he's Mr. Perfect, he's been a topic of conversation basically every day since (and it's been months since they've talked)."}
{"id": "t3_11kbbv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Best friend and I got into a little fight, how should I proceed? [I'm 18M, she's 17F]", "post": "So she's been blogging about girly stuff for a while now but she has refused to tell me the site and such, so I decided to let it go. a month or two later, I came across her pinterest account, in her \"about me\" section, there it was, her blog. So the next day I told her I found her blog and she totally flipped out on me. Saying things like me being creepy and stalking her. I explain to her that I am in no way judging her about what she blogs about and she understands this. But she is still pissed about the fact that \"I stalked her\" (which I didn't, I stumbled across her account because she keeps telling me how interesting pinterest was). She's now ignoring me and stuff\n\nSo what should I do? Should I apologize to her to save our friendship (We are actually pretty close friends)? Or should I let time take its course?\n\nI'm pretty sure I am somehow making things seem more complicated than it is on this post, but I am truly stumped and I am completely clueless to the minds of females.\n\nI do cherish this relationship greatly (was even considering moving it to the next level). But sometimes she just acts up to the tiniest things that I don't understand. Reddit halp?", "summary": "Best friend and I got into a fight about something (I consider to be) small, and now I am confused as to what to do"}
{"id": "t3_4dzd8b", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Considering divorce for financial reasons, but still together (CA)", "post": "For a few financial reasons, my husband and I are considering a legal divorce. There are two aspects to this: will it help us in the way I think it will, and are there other ways to obtain similar benefits as a married couple has. \n\nThe thought process: \nPrimarily, my husband just graduated college in December with nearly $100,000 in loans, about half through Sallie Mae. I did not cosign on any of these. Since he has not found a job as of yet and only has a couple months left before repayment begins, the thought is that if we remain married, they will a) consider my income when evaluating deferment or income-based repayment, and b) hold me liable for the loans after a certain time period (10 years, I believe?). If we divorce now, my income -should- no longer be considered in repayment and I won't be held accountable for the loans since they were entirely his, entirely used for his tuition, and I have received no benefit.\n\nYes, I know our taxes will go up, but I'm guessing not the $800 - $1000 a month his payments will be.\n\nAdditionally, at the moment he is carried on my insurance because Covered California counts my income and it makes him ineligible. If we divorce, theoretically he could then qualify for subsidized insurance, possibly at a lower cost than my coverage. \n\nIf this is correct and we decide to divorce, are there other documents we can have to ensure certain benefits - Power of attorney, medical rights, etc. I know tax rates and insurance aren't possible to affect, but what other documents can serve to ensure we have rights to make hospitalization/medical decisions and financial decisions should the need arise?", "summary": "If we divorce, will his loans only count his income, will I not be held accountable for them, and what other documents can serve in place of marital benefits? "}
{"id": "t3_15yjgy", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "[PLEA]Let's Improve Together", "post": "The self-improvement Reddit community is vibrant, brilliant, insightful, and I want to wrap this all up.\n\nAs many of you all know, I have been deeply immersed in self improvement topics for the past year or so. Through my blog, I have tried to reach as many people as possible, but alas my writing style and lack of experience often do not provide as much assistance as I would hope.\n\nTherefore, I want to work WITH the Reddit self improvement community in order to develop a valuable quarterly magazine that is filled with submissions from you all. It would be a group project for the Reddit self improvement community and anyone who wants to help is welcome.\n\nThe next step for this to become a reality are as follows:\n\n1.\tGarner enough interest among the Reddit community to choose a name for the publication, create a website, and prepare to accept submissions (finalize what this magazine will be)\n2.\tOpen up submissions for self improvement topics, such as willpower, meditation, diet, and a variety of others\n3.\tCreate the first issue with Reddit contributors (designers and content providers)\n4.\tStart a Kickstarter project to raise money for the first printing\n5.\tPrint and promote\n\nSo everyone knows, I have no stake in this with no advertisers lined up or any way for me to personally benefit. I'm going to make this as democratic as possible, though I will play a significant role in editing as I will spend a considerable amount of time writing and reading submissions in order to organize them. \n\nIf you guys are interested in this, please either message me or post here and we can create either a subreddit for ourselves or a skype group to hash out the specifics. Thanks!", "summary": "Collectively, you and I are creating a Reddit self improvement magazine composed of submissions from the community that will initially be funded by Kickstarter. (No monetary gain for myself)"}
{"id": "t3_2ta0ix", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Osgood-schlatters continious pain", "post": "I am a 26 year old white male who is 6'1 and weighs 83kg. This is an ongoing condition that I have had since I was about 13. It's called osgood-schlatters and I went to see the doctors when I was younger and they said I would grow out of it. I am obviously a lot older now and it is still present below my knee (as a nice big lump). It causes me a lot of discomfort and pain. I have a total of a 30 min walk to work in the morning and evening and for the rest of the day I am sitting down mostly. After long periods this can make my knee really ache.\n\nI am quite an active person; I play a lot of Paintball (running and squatting for long periods at a time), squash and swimming. After these activities the pain does flair up and i usually just put up with it!\n\nI have seen the doctors and they said that there isn't much to do other than try to rest it as much as possible and take some ibuprofen when the pain flairs up. They did hint at surgery to remove this but I thought I would ask on here to get some additional advice or to see if anyone else has this condition before I look at such a thing.\n\nThanks.", "summary": "25 year old male who has osgood-schlatters and it is still causing him pain and doesn't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2bv6dl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19M] girlfriend [19F] and I are starting our sophomore year of college soon, at different colleges.", "post": "We have been dating for more than 3 years, and we went to the same colleges we are going to this year. She goes to college 2.5 hours south of our home town and I go to college 2.5 hours north of our home town.\n\nLast year when we were leaving it was extremely hard. I never cry, and I cried for about 10 minutes. I kept feeling like I was never going to see her again. It was terrible.\n\nThis year I thought it would be easier because we have already been through it and it turned out alright, but I'm starting to get that feeling again. It feels the same as it did last year. I'm going to miss her a lot.\n\nWe both love our respective colleges, and both give us the best financial options (she has a full ride and I have my tuition paid for). I have often considered putting myself in even greater debt by transferring to her school just to be with her. I still think about it. Or if she transferred to my college.\n\nSo is there any way to help how we feel about it? What should I do? Is it something I'm basically gonna have to deal with?", "summary": "My girlfriend and I go to college 5 hours apart. Leaving for college is really hard. What should I do about it?"}
{"id": "t3_13eto8", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Someone has cashed $5,000 worth of fake checks with my name and address on them. Help/Advice?", "post": "Hi Reddit. Last year someone stole my wallet with my driver's license and since that time I've received over a dozen notifications from various collection agencies notifying me of bounced checks with my name and address on them (from Target, Michael's, Toys R Us, Burlington Coat Factory, all in excess of $200). The routing numbers and check numbers on these \"checks\" are entirely fabricated. the \"checks\" also say they are from Wells Fargo but I don't even have an account with that bank.\n\nI've filed a police report which states that I've experienced these instances of identity theft. The problem is that the credit collectors don't seem to want to believe that these checks are NOT mine, nor are they associated with my actual bank account.\n\nI've compiled a long paper trail with several of these collection agencies trying to explain this to no avail. I've called the agencies and sat through 40 minute automated calls only to be asked for my payment information.\n\nI don't know what to do anymore. Has anyone experienced anything similar? Please let me know how or if you think I can settle this. \n\nAlso, I had great credit up until this point and now it's devastated. I'm 23 yrs old, do you think I'll be able to restore it?", "summary": "Someone is using my name and address on fake checks and debt collectors don't want to believe I'm not responsible. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_383p71", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] with my [22 F] of 7months, found she recently saved pictures of her and her exbf.", "post": "Before getting into my current relationship I was burned in my last 2, only relevant to this situation because my current girlfriend knew all about it and how it's affected me semi long term when it comes to trust.\n\nI have known my girlfriend for years as she is my younger sisters old best friend. Her and her last long term boyfriend of about 4ish years (I THINK) would linger in each others lives up until she met me, or so she says. He was abusive and hit her (twice), degraded her, cheated on her, didn't let her have friends, made her stay in the house while he went out to drink etc. etc. etc. I spoil and treat her the absolute complete opposite of the way that he did. Last night while we were sitting on the couch she was going through her emails and I noticed she sent an attachment to herself. When I asked her to open it she did and it was a picture she saved off of Instagram, before deleting it from her Instagram, of her and the exbf that I described above kissing while on vacation from about 2 years ago.\n\nI don't know what to do. I don't know if I am overreacting. I asked her why she did that and she said \"I am a hoarder, I save everything\" but when I didn't buy that explanation she got overly emotional and angry because she knows I am a no bullshit kind of guy and she knows to me this is some bullshit. It was on her Instagram prior to her deleting it...there are other pictures of them together on Instagram that she left up but she saved this specific one to her email and then deleted it from Instagram. I am so confused, I feel like I am getting played yet again. I don't know what to do because I do love her but it's so early in a relationship for that kind of shit it makes me think they're either still lingering in each others lives or she isn't over him...", "summary": "Sitting on couch with girlfriend while she was going through her emails. Saw she sent an attachment to herself, asked her to open it revealing a picture of her and her exbf from 2yrs ago kissing."}
{"id": "t3_2089xh", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Help needed: random aggression in 11 month old Husky/Shepherd mix", "post": "My friend picked up a dog two days ago from a shelter, an eleven month old female husky/shepherd (possibly German Shepherd?) mix. She is super sweet most of the time, but she growled at my friend's mother, and at my friend when she was going to pick up a stick, then the dog nipped at one of her friends because the girl tried to push the dog down. The bite ended up drawing blood, and since it was so soon after getting the dog (and apparently the shelter released the dog without her rabies shot), my friend called the shelter to see what to do. They told her she had to quarantine the dog for 10 days, which she had to do at the shelter. When she took the dog in, she described the behavior above and the woman at the shelter strongly recommended turning the dog over to be euthanized because she was too \"unpredictable\" and could be dangerous. My friend felt she didn't have much choice in the matter and turned the dog over. I'm not sure if she can even get her back now (she's in the quarantine process at the moment), but my question is whether there is training that is likely to help this kind of behavior? She showed no aggression towards me whatsoever, but my friend is worried she'll be too dangerous to take out in public or to have people come over. She wants a dog she'd be able to take out with her to public places, but she's also been crying all day about the dog being put down. I'd really like to believe she could train the dog to be better, but is random aggression something that can be gotten rid of? If the responses are unpredictable, what can you really do?", "summary": "11 month, female, husky/shepherd mix, usually sweet, but exhibits random aggression towards different people. Is this fixable?"}
{"id": "t3_ewpew", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Am I greedy?", "post": "Background info: I'm 24 (almost 25), I graduated from college in 2008.  I make a decent amount of money at my job; enough that after a couple years of living at my parents' I was able to but myself a house and a nice car.  \n\nSo a few days ago a friend asks if I want to see a movie tonight with him and another friend.  They both work at the theater and are able to get a guest in free.  So I'm assuming I'll be going for free.  Today I ask him about it and tells me that he invited another friend and her boyfriend (and claims he invited them first) so they get the free tickets.  Mind you I don't think he even asked our other friend if it was cool if they used his guest pass.\n\nThis kind of bugged me so I said something to him about and he responds with something along the lines of \"well they probably won't go if they can't get in free.  No offense, but they don't have a lot of money and I feel like you can afford it.\"  He also said something about how he wouldn't be going either if he didn't work there because he doesn't have any money either.  I won't even get into that one, but let's just say he has another job as well and the only reason he's broke is because he spends frivolously on stupid shit.  I kind of just let it go after that.\n\nIt is true that I have more money than the rest of them, but between college loans, car payments, and a mortgage, I'm probably more in debt than the 4 of them combined.  \n\nTo me it would make more sense if we all (or at least the 3 guests) to split the cost of one ticket... The funny thing is that if I had been offered the guest pass I probably would have offered it to one of the other two anyway.  So maybe it's just an ego thing and I feel slighted. \n\nSo what is it Reddit?  Am I greedy?  An Egomaniac?  Or am I being reasonable?", "summary": "I have more money than my friends so they think I should get less free shit.  I think that's kind of bs.  Am I greedy?"}
{"id": "t3_1tcyaf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My Dad [62 M] is offering me [17 M] a gift I don't know that I can accept", "post": "For some background - my parents divorced when I was very young, and from a young age I would stay with my dad every other weekend. When I was about 13 after several incidents I realised what a manipulative person he was and cut ties with him. My Step-Mom died two years ago, and within six months he was engaged to what will be his fourth wife.\n\nHe has made intermittent contact with me over the last few years, and all invitations of contact have been turned down. He asked me to be his Best-Man at his wedding, which I also declined.\n\nCut to today - I got a letter from him asking me for a last time to go to his wedding. I don't know whether or not to go yet. Anyway - he has moved to a new country with his new fianc\u00e9e and as a result is leaving his old car here. He has offered to let me have it, no strings attached, but I would feel hypocritical accepting it. The problem is that I am in desperate need of a car and money is very tight at the moment. It would be so incredible to accept it, but I feel I would be using him.\n\nAny help is very welcome.", "summary": "Estranged father is offering me his old car, I don't know if I can take it without being a hypocrite"}
{"id": "t3_2kfh8k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "There's a girl [20-22 F] who I [M 24] see at the Panera I frequent. I would like to 'date' her. As someone who's only had one girlfriend his entire life, how do I approach this?", "post": "I'm a student, and I'm at school most the day. \n\nBut on breaks I sometimes go to Panera, I'd say 3-4 times a week.\n\nI see one girl there about half the time.\n\nI realize that people at food places are supposed to be nice, but she's usually cleaning tables, and I always get my order to go. \n\nEvery time I come in, she cleans a something near me, and tries to start a conversation.\n\nPG-13: Extra info: She has a body that I'm really into. \n\nAss looks great in her work khakis, she usually has a loose apron on that covers her chest, but even then, I can tell that she has some very large breasts underneath. \n\nIdeally, I'd like to have a relationship with her.\n\nBut right now, I'm in a position where I don't want a full fledged girlfriend. \n\nSomeone to hang out with, and yes, someone to mess around with.\n\nAs the title says, I have little dating experience.\n\nSo I just thought I'd run my thoughts by reddit, and see what you guys though.\n\nShould I just go in for the kill, or strike up more conversation and let it occur naturally?", "summary": "Girl at Panera that I go to many times a week. I'm a noob at dating. I think she likes me. I'd like to date her. Advice on how to approach this?"}
{"id": "t3_39wy2r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (28f) with boyfriend (29m) lacking intimacy caused by his depression. Wondering how to be supportive and dealing with feelings of guilt.", "post": "We've been together about a year but have been friends for 7 years. \n\nI had gotten out of an emotionally abusive relationship with a man who was severely mentally ill (delusional, heard voices, manic depression and so on) before I started dating my current bf, I'll call him Adam.\n\nI loved because he was sweet, caring, didn't have a quick temper, treated me with respect and so on. It was much different from my last relationship. Adam also had a good job, master's degree and took care of himself.  Ambition and handsome, the whole package\n\nWell the industry hes worked in for the last 8 years and has his master's in has taken a sever down turn. His friends are all being laid off, including him. There's little to no jobs available and he's been unemployed for 4 months. \n\nHe no longer works out. He's almost completely stopped walking his dog. I do it when I get off work (he usually comes with, but I need to make the suggestion) and we hardly communicate now. \n\nHe also suffered a knee injury from work which makes excersing difficult. Which wad one of his favorite things and we often enjoyed running together. \n\nI told him recently I need more intimacy and our lack of communication has been making me very unhappy. He apologized and is trying but I feel awful that he things he needs to force a smile around me. I feel guilty for feeling liked this because I'm not trying to make his problems about me, but I don't know how to be supportive anymore. \n\nI loved him for his sense of humor and ambition (among other things) but they've both almost disappeared. After dealing with someone depressed for so long in my last relationship I find it exhausting trying to maintain my current one. \n\nHe feels like his body is broken and that he's wasted his life on a degree that's now pointless. I can't say I blame him for being depressed but I can't keep going like this.", "summary": "boyfriend has lost his job and has a degree in an industry with a grim outlook. He's suffered an injury that's kept him from excersing. Not sure what to do, his depression is making me unhappy."}
{"id": "t3_1wmhch", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my gf [22 F] 2 years, mother thinks i'm unattractive and telling my gf.", "post": "Basically I've been dating my girlfriend for 2 years and her mother finds me unattractive and keeps voicing it to my gf.  I know it shouldn't bother me but she really values how her mother feels.  It hurts my feelings because I'm afraid that she might not find me that attractive as well.\n\nBackground:\nI don't think i'm the hottest guy or anything but do believe that I am above average in the looks department.  She is very attractive however and I think her mom doesn't think I'm good enough for her daughter.  She says when her mom brings up these kinds of things she just brushes them off and \"doesn't take them to heart.\"  \n\nIdk what to do at this point because I care about my girlfriend alot and don't want her mom to plant a seed in my girlfriends mind that I'm not good for her...The real kicker however is that we got engaged recently and these talks have gotten more frequent and its really starting to get under my skin.", "summary": "gf 2 years mother talks to her about how i'm unattractive and that if she wants to back out of recent engagement than she would understand even if she was down alot of money."}
{"id": "t3_3gcl4a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with girl [21 F] Not Ready / needs more time, but just returned to tinder?", "post": "So I've been hanging out with this girl for a few weeks and I've developed feelings for her. We text and snapchat almost every day and I've taken her out on a few dates. She stayed over one night after a party and that morning we cuddled and I kissed her.\nEver since then she started to act differently. She tells me she isn't over her ex (broke up 5-6 months ago) and that it's not fair to me. She says I'm so good to her, and nice and that she doesn't want to hurt me down the road. She said she just wasn't ready for this and that she needed time.\nAfter I started to feel like she was acting differently I looked at her profile on Tinder (that's how we met) and a few days ago it said she hadn't been online in over a month, and now it's very recent (a few hours ago).\n\nIs she trying to say she isn't into me without saying that she doesn't like me to avoid hurting my feelings? Or is this something legitimate?\nI'm 24M she is 21F", "summary": "girl I met on tinder tells me she's not ready and needs more time, but she's on tinder again after a month+ hiatus."}
{"id": "t3_4hxui3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(20m) have this uneasy feeling about relationships, how do i stop feeling like this?", "post": "So I'm a college student and I think it's time for me to get my first actual girlfriend but idk how or even if I should.\nI read a lot on this sub and honestly I can't see myself as a boyfriend or maybe I'm just scared to be one.\n\n- I'm scared that my girlfriend would cheat on me\n\n- I'm scared that I won't find someone\n- I'm scared of all the bad things that I read on here will happen to me like cheating, emotionally distress, whether if I make the right choice of breaking up or not.\n\nHell i read a lot about ppls experiences on love and relationships and I try to soak in what ppls advice is so I can be ahead of the curve, it's like I'm preparing myself to be a boyfriend but I'm just scared.\n\nHow do you guys do it?\n\n1. from finding a girl to actually like you\n\n2. not cheating on them or them not cheating on you\nfinding out red flags like who they're hanging out with to what other ppls intentions are with your SO?\n\n3. how to keep things fun and not boring, yea dates and romantic evenings, cool convos but I don't want to be a boyfriend that becomes \"boring\"\n\n4. how do I not disappoint in bed, like I want to get good and not disappoint\n\nI keep reading and reading a lot of topics on everyone's secret to a long term and successful relationship and marriage, and it helps but I'm still afraid\nHell I can hold a conversation no problem in that dept but approaching a really pretty girl is like my Achilles heel, I get really nervous.\nBasically I'm asking; how do you guys do it? How do you people manage to keep going with relationships and make them happy and successful\n\nI feel like I'm freaking out for no reason and I do want a girlfriend but I just can't shake this uneasy feeling.", "summary": "how do i make myself stop worrying about all of this, and how do i get out there and actually find a girl worth being with"}
{"id": "t3_2eyy0o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [14 M] have a crush on this new girl [15 F]. How should I go on about it?", "post": "First of all, I would like to thank everyone who opened it even if they knew it was only a teen with girl problems.\n\n This new girl came to school one week ago and I was in love since the first time I saw here. I talked to her for the first time 3 days ago, but I just introduced myself. 2 days ago I messaged her on facebook and we talked for a little while, it was mostly me asking her questions about herself. Then yesterday we said like 2 sentences to each other! That's all we've talked together! What should I do about this now? When should I message her again, or when should I talk to her in person. She seems really shy in person so I don't know what to do. Any advice is appreciated!", "summary": "I [14M] have a crush on this new girl [15F] and we've talked few times. What should i do now?"}
{"id": "t3_36gdjz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (28/F) New Coworker (24/M)is spitting image of my Nightmare Ex (23/M-dated 1.5 years)", "post": "Hi Ladies and Gents, \n\nSo.. a few months ago, I had a devastating break-up. I mean completely awful, worst break-up I've ever gone through, total nightmare situation. We dated for a year and a half. I did not have any closure, and his behavior was (and continues to be) downright spiteful and abusive. We lived together, so I ended up moving back with my mom for a bit. I am currently going through a kind of transitory period, and have just gotten a new part-time job. \n\nOn the first day of my new job, one of the new supervisors came in, and my stomach dropped. This man is an exact copy of my Ex. Hair, glasses, clothes.. everything. I actually had trouble training with him because I felt weirdly sick and turned on in equal measure. \n\nTomorrow is day 2. I am not sure how to handle this situation. I feel like I am already acting weird around this person, who is more or less a total stranger to me. I know I am projecting my feelings about my ex onto coworker, but I'm not sure how to control this situation. One minute, I want to punch him in the face. The next minute, I want him to fuck me on his desk.", "summary": "New coworker STRONGLY resembles recent Ex. Having trouble separating this stranger from my feelings about Ex following traumatic break-up."}
{"id": "t3_48mssa", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU after having ice cold showers for a year", "post": "Dear Reddit, this year I fucked up...\n\nSo I moved to the UK almost a year ago, and I live in a beautiful, brand-new student accommodation. My only concern has been that the showers were 90% of the time ice cold, and almost never steamy hot.\n\nYesterday, I've been hanging out with some of my British friends and we've been talking about what we miss from home. My immediate first thought was, shit, I just love a good shower back home. So I said it out loud, and all I got in return was confused faces.\nAfter being publicly shamed over the fact that I have been living like an idiot for a year, and then demonstrating me how to properly use the shower, I got away by saying that mine must be faulty, then...\n\nThe truth is far from that, though. The switch controlling the heat could be turned way more backwards by pushing a button on it... Having done that, I spent around 50 minutes under the shower, laughing like a maniac while crying inside.\n\nSo here I am, on reddit, after having my first hot shower after a year. I feel like an idiot.", "summary": "Been having cold showers for a year, explained it to a group of friends, turns out my stupid brain failed to realise there is more to the problem. Just had my first hot shower."}
{"id": "t3_4c47pd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20/M] It's been a year and i'm still not over her [19/F] anyone have any advice?", "post": "**Background info** - We only dated for a few months and were starting a relationship, but then things went terribly wrong and it ended. I love her. Her looks and personality were what I looked and dreamt for in a woman. We just clicked from the get go.  I tried my hardest to make it work, but she obviously didn't feel the same + she was starting her new life at uni so why would she bother when she's got so many opportunities a head of her. \n\n**My problem** - It hurts so much. The heartbreak is horrible! My heartstrings have been pulled so hard and I've never felt like this before. It fucking sucks! She wasn't even in my life that long yet she's affected it so much! (you can probably tell I haven't been in many or long relationships). I just want to move on with my life! And I know what you're going to say... go out and date new woman but its not that simple for some reason they most woman want nothing to do with me otherwise I would've been in plenty of long lasting relationships and lost my virginity by now. And the funny thing is I'm not even unattractive. \n\nI also want to add how lame  I think it is that I cant stop lusting over someone that was in my life for such a short period, when theres no many people out there who've gone through divorce etc and they're doing just fine! my emotions are bullshit!", "summary": "I just want to know how I can get over the heart ache without dating new woman etc. Any advice would be really appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_3hmtyv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my friend (?) [22 F] since 3 month. I don't know how to be only firends and I don't want to lose her.", "post": "Hi,\ntomorrow I'll meet Marie again (only the two of us as always). She told me regularly we are not dating. She just wants us to be friends or at least she said so. I never had this before. My brain automatically thinks: \"M and F are meeting regularly and they know each other for a short time = dates\". We always have a great time.\n\nI like her alot, dont want to lose her and I need to learn how not want to have sex with her. Or i need to learn what to do that she wants to have sex with me. (not only sex, cuddle/kissing, whatever you want, i just want to be close to her). \n\nIm very upset sometimes because of this situation, because i'm looking for a GF/FWB since 6 month now and i got the feeling we could have a great time together.\n\nWhat can i tell her tomorrow, to make clear I like her also in another way than she does, without risking to lose her?", "summary": "We like each other alot. I want more. She doesn't. How not to lose her and learn that we are only firends or try to convince her that FWB is better than friends."}
{"id": "t3_3iahuj", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by taking the wrong pill.", "post": "No throwaway because the Dow was down and I'm feeling like enough of a ballsy idiot. This happened now. I'm prescribed Adderall and Lunesta PRN, which means I take both when I need to versus at a specific time each day. I pulled a muscle at the gym today and have been in moderate pain. While I was brushing my teeth, I remembered that I had Lunesta and opened the cabinet to take a pill with the brilliant idea that I would call it an early night and avoid tossing and turning in pain.\n\nTook the pill, lay down in bed, and settled in to some wholly mediocre episodes of 30 Rock. An hour in, which is usually when I feel like I'm about to pass out and shut my laptop off, I realized that I felt more awake, so I made myself some tea and tried for another hour. No dice. I went to pour myself another cup of tea and realized the Lunesta bottle was next to the bed, which made no sense, because I didn't take it in the bathroom. The bait and switch clicked and I realized that instead of taking my sleeping pill, I'm pretty sure I took my 10mg pill for staying awake. Fuck. Me. Of course, they look [pretty] [similar] so in the dark of the bathroom, I probably wouldn't have paid attention to the color. No wonder I couldn't fall asleep. Time to drink lots of water, marathon Netflix, and see what Reddit is like when Australia takes over once the US goes to sleep.", "summary": "Thanks Adderall, thanks folks, I'll *definitely* be here all night. Try the veal."}
{"id": "t3_265re5", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "HOA vs. street parking at my in-home daycare", "post": "Hi all,\n\nMy son attends a fabulous in-home daycare. Apparently, however, his wonderful, sweet caregiver is being harassed because I *gasp* parked on the street (as opposed to in the driveway) for (I timed it) ...108 seconds this morning. Less than 2 minutes. There was already a car in the driveway dropping off another child and I didn't want to block her in, as I know the mom and I know we both have the same time requirement for when to be at school. My husband with a more flexible schedule typically drops my son off, so it's not usually a big deal to wait. Anyhoo...it's not a gated community. It's a public street. Is that even legal for this guy to call and harass her? (Apparently this has happened with other parents and I mean, dude, get a life. Like does he stare out his window and just look for cars parked on the street? He must have. Total glassbowl, apparently.) Add to this the fact that there are *always* work trucks parked on the street because they're doing someone's lawn, or it's someone's housecleaning service. Right, OK, so it's cool for lawn guys to park huge-ass trucks on the street for hours at a time but my 4 door sedan being parked for less than 2 minutes is a crisis. \n\nHe apparently threatened to call the county to complain about her not paying proper taxes (which she does) and all kinds of other nonsense. Seriously, he's off his rocker about this. But is it legal? He's a realtor, so his info is publicly available. I really want to contact him and tell him that if my car is so terribly inconveniencing to him, he should speak to *me* about it instead of cowering behind stupid threats and harassing a sweet woman who watches babies all day.", "summary": "Glassbowl neighbor of my in-home daycare provider is harassing her because I parked on the street for less than 2 minutes this morning. Can he seriously do this?"}
{"id": "t3_3pf9wa", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "How will my student loans affect my line of credit for a car?", "post": "Hi PF! Looking into replacing the used PoS car I purchased to get me threw college now that I have a stable job. I have a strong budget/savings plan and I'm currently paying double my minimum payment on my student loans to to pay that off in ~5 years. I'm wondering what affect that debt might have on my ability to get a good interest rate on a car loan.\n\nSome deets...\nI had $16.5k in student loans when I graduated in May 2014. As of Oct 2015, I have about $14.2k left. \n\nLooking to put $10k down ($8k cash and $2k trade in) on a car between $17k-$19k. So I'd finance between $7k and $9k.\n\nI run monthly balances on two credit cards between $300-$500 but pay them off each month. I've never carried a balance in the four years I've had a credit card. I have a Very Good credit score but little history in my credit.", "summary": "Does a student loan balance of ~$14k negatively affect my chances of getting an auto loan with a good interest rate? Should I wait until I've paid off more of that debt before getting another loan?"}
{"id": "t3_2mjs16", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/f] Mixing business & pleasure: sleeping with a DJ/producer I'm supposed to be managing", "post": "Hi everyone of reddit I need you. 21 female here. \nSo I'm currently a freelance artist manager, which means I help musicians get their career going so they can focus on creating music.\nI've been working with my client for a few weeks now, and it's come to the point where we have so much in common (same music tastes, same interests, pretty much if I was a guy he would be me) so inevitably we've ended up being really really good friends and just recently slept together. \n\nI'm just trying to figure out where I'm supposed to go from here. I want him to do well in his career, since in the end, me doing well is totally contingent of him doing well, which is why I feel like mixing business and pleasure is a bad idea. However, I see it working out. I don't see myself in a relationship anytime soon, and feel like I can keep my emotions away and keep things platonic. As a female, I also feel like I'm battling the constant \"oh you gave in too soon, you're being too easy\" but really, I WANTED this. Who is anyone to tell me that I'm too easy for doing this on my own will, cause if the situation was reversed no one would be calling the guy \"easy\". \n\nSo what do you guys think about mixing business and pleasure. Is it all just gonna go to shit? Is communication key? Should I just quit while I'm ahead?", "summary": "slept with the guy I'm supposed to be working for and need advice on what to do b/c he's a cool person and I see him more as a friend than a client at this point"}
{"id": "t3_4x5ctp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 /F] and my coworker [59 /F] had an altercation at work today, unsure on how to procede? Am i overeacting?", "post": "I work part time in a hotel laundry room, and had a altercation with a member of the housekeeping staff on my shift today.\n\nPart of my job is to go up the each floor of the hotel and grab bags of dirty laundry and bring them down to the laundry room.  Today, i was busy and didnt go to grab the last bags until 3.  I am off shift at 4, so that still gave me plenty of time.\n\nBefore i could go upstairs, a member of the housekeeping team noticed the bags were still there and became very upset.  She burst into the laundry room and began yelling at me about the issue.\n\nI was shocked at her behavior, but calmly stated that i was on my way to get the bags and had not forgotten.  She kept yelling, becoming increasingly aggressive.\n\nI asked her politely to stop, and mentioned that in the future a polite conversation is all it takes if she has an issue with me.\n\nHer response to this was to call me a racist ( she is Chinese), and accuse me of not listening to my housekeeper co-workers because they are Asian.\n\nI told her that the conversation was over if she was going to accuse me of racism.  I will not be speaking to her without a manager present from now on.\n\nI immediately sent a message to my direct supervisor who was off today, and plan on visiting the hotel tomorrow to speak to the general manager.\n\nI really need this job, I am a student.  Otherwise, i cant see myself working somewhere where I am going to be verbally harassed and called a racist.\n\nReddit, any tips?  I would like some outsider opinions because I am still feeling shaken up by this incident.\n\nHonestly, I have never seen an adult behave this way and I am not sure how to address it.\n\nI would also like to note that there was another person working in laundry with me that day, who was not yelled at despite the fact that we share responsibilities. He is willing to give a witness statement for me about the incident.\n\nThanks", "summary": "Co-worker was verbally abrasive and accused me of racism because I didnt pick up a bag of dirty laundry fast enough."}
{"id": "t3_1q4uq8", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Young adults/reddit parents: how have you found ways of asking a parent to loan you money and figure out a way of paying it back? Diplomatically.", "post": "I know this question has a lot to do with the kind of relationship one has with each parent and at what stage in life you are personally and professionally.\nI'm 27, moved two states away for grad school, and i'm living strictly off loans. It's my first semester and I'm taking 12 hours. I'm an ex-teacher, so I have some professional background. No savings. I've travelled quite a bit though. Shooting for an assistantship/internship in the Spring. I've never been this low on funds. It's also scary realizing how much deeper I am putting myself into the dark debt hole of student loans.\nI'm pretty much living on a credit card for the next two months and I am too ashamed to ask my parents for any money. I can nanny here or there, but it takes time and effort (yes, like everything) to find families needing a babysitter in a giant college town. I will get organized enough to pay my father back, of course. He's already loaned me close to $1,000 in the past four or five months and I feel a little disgusting since he has a hard time making any income himself. Mother is another story--she's got a really tight grasp on her pocket and is a little aggressive when it comes to financial advice. So I never approach her.\nMy dad is the kindest man I know and has the cleanest reputation among his contacts, which is why people trust him and partner with him so much. His kindness does get the best of him however, sometimes to his detriment. In other words, people have walked all over him in the past. Mom, on the other hand, is constantly reminding me about payments, asking me about my loan, really approaching things in a way that push me far from wanting to face finances. Fabulous parenting. It's always been this way, with anything growing up. Dad never seemed to say no, he always gave me options/choices. Mom was a straightforward, dry, clear, British NO. She has always said I don't have my feet firmly grounded. I'm getting off on a tangent now so I'll stop.", "summary": "I have great respect for each of my parents and they are both very different in their approach to finances. I want some first-hand experience advice."}
{"id": "t3_3piiw2", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Let a friend stay in my apartment while I was gone and my utilities bill skyrocketed!", "post": "Throwaway account, just because.\n\nFor three weeks last month I was traveling for work. An old friend contacted me right before I left, asking if she could stay with me while doing job interviews nearby. I told her that I wouldn't be around but that I would give her free access to my apartment. She ended up staying for two weeks and left the place in great shape. However, I'm just getting around to paying my bills for that period and I realized that my utilities bill is MUCH higher than usual. I've never seen my bill this high before and fall usually has the cheapest months because the climate is so neutral. Unlike most apartment buildings that I know of, each unit is responsible for it's own utilities, meaning that every bill I receive is for my own apartment's usage (instead of a total cost that is split between all of the tenants throughout the building). She was the only one in the apartment for the majority of that period. I thought I was doing the right thing by letting her use my place for free, but now I'm wondering if I should bring this up. \n\nIf I'm ever in a position again where I let someone use my apartment, should I make some sort of stipulation about energy usage? Should I be \"that dick\" that charges a fee?", "summary": "Let an old friend stay in my apartment for a couple of weeks, resulted in an ugly utilities bill, now wondering if I should do something about it or move on."}
{"id": "t3_3yfsmw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my friend with benefits [22M], met family this week. Are we dating?", "post": "Last year I [24F]met my friend, let's call him Finn [22M]. Finn works full time in the Navy and was home for leave around Thanksgiving last year. \n\nWe met at a mutual friend's house and immediately hit it off. He added me on Facebook and asked me to visit one more time (on his last day of leave). I made the trip and it was a great night. I figured that was the last of it. A few weeks go by and Finn messages me on Facebook, inviting me to visit him. He is stationed in Hawaii. I agreed. I mean, Hawaii?! Fuck yeah! I stayed with Finn for 10 days in which I was wined and dined. Yes there was a lot of sex, but there was a lot of personal interaction I never anticipated.\n\n Fast forward almost a year to this week. I visited Finn at his parents' house for a few days. Not only did I meet his family and have dinner with them, but I was also given a present. From conversation with his brother I knew he had told them about me previously. To top it off, his mom added me on Facebook. I like to believe if I were in a relationship, I would know, and it would be established. However, my friends think what Finn and I have is more than a friend's with benefits arrangement. What's really going on? I'm really confused.", "summary": "I met my friends with benefits' family this week and received a Christmas present. Worried we might actually be dating."}
{"id": "t3_31ix82", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30/F] broke up with my [35 M] boyfriend of 6 amazing months because he smokes. Petty?", "post": "My \"ex\" is one of the most amazing dudes I have ever met as far as our personalities and chemistry goes. He's the kindest person I have ever met, we laugh endlessly together it seems. Now that some time has passed and the magical glitter cloud we've been dancing in has settled, the fact that he smokes frequently bothers me a tremendous amount. \n\nWhen we first started dating he said it was an occasional habbit. I was OK with an occasional cigarette here and there because I used to smoke and I \"get it.\" However,  I eventually found working out and eating healthy was going to be my lifestyle rather than self-destruction. \n\nHe tried working out and eating better with me (this was completely his own doing, I had no verbal infuence on this new bahavior whatsoever), he even quit smoking for a month or two but now he's just back to eating junk food and smoking. His habbits are completely opposite of mine and I am completely repulsed by his lack of self-care, but I fucking love the dude and I am in a tough spot. \n\nTwo nights ago I told him that I didn't sign up to date a smoker. Over the course of the 6 months we've been together I have made it clear how the smoking bothers me, but it does not seem to phase him and he seems set in his ways. He just has excuses and hasn't made mention of trying to quit smoking. So, I broke up with him last night and he seems perfectly OK with that regardless of the amazing connection we had. Was I in the right to leave him based on my values? Was it only conditional love if I was able to leave him because there was a condition I could not dea with? I need some validation here, because I kind of feel like a dirt bag for not being able to accept him for this flaw but at the same time I feel fleeced that he knew very well he was a hard core smoker with crappy lifestyle habbits and just wanted to put on the facade that he was a person I could be with.", "summary": "I feel deceived that my boyfriend of 6 months said he was an occasional smoker but seems to have a solid and frequent dependancy on smoking. I broke up with him last night, was I right to do so?"}
{"id": "t3_2px1ss", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Trying to keep my[20f] relationship together with my fianc\u00e9 [24m] for the sake of our 1yr old.", "post": "My fianc\u00e9 and I have been together for four years, he is the love of my life. Two years ago I was sure he was the man I would spend the rest of my life with and I thought I couldn't wait to have a baby with him, so I got pregnant. For a while everything was great, it wasn't perfect and we definitely had our problems but they were workable.\n\nThen, back in August I catch him talking to his ex girlfriend, nothing really inappropriate but I had asked him in the beginning of our relationship not to talk to her because it made me uncomfortable (they had just broken up 2 months before we started dating). We had a huge argument and he cried to me and swore he'd never do something to fuck up our relationship again. Then 5 weeks later his female friend has relationship problems and he lies to me and says he's staying late at school and can't pick our daughter up, so he can goto her house for an hour and help her, I guess. I caught him, he admitted everything but insists that nothing happened. I believe him, kind of.\n\nHere's the thing, I don't want to be with him anymore. I love our daughter so much though and I know that if I just tried, we could get through this for her sake. I also dug my own grave when I got pregnant because I set myself up to rely on his income. I feel like he's holding me back and like I'm holding myself back and quite honestly I feel like I'm missing out on a lot of fun things that people my age are doing and it kills me. I know now that we were no where near ready to have a child but I feel like it's my responsibility to stay with him and live out the life I've created for myself.  Even if it means I having to be unhappy. \n\nWhat do you think I should do? Does anyone see a plan C?", "summary": "I'm no longer happy in my relationship after my fianc\u00e9 betrayed my trust but don't have the means or the heart to take my daughter away from him and am wondering what my best option could be."}
{"id": "t3_1jxjaz", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Bichonpoo aggressive at the groomers", "post": "I have a two and a half year old bichonpoo that I took the groomers the other day. We had moved from another city so this would be her second appt. at this groomer. It had been a year since her last appointment because my family and I decided to groom her ourselves. She was happy and excited when we got there and pee'd a little when the groomer examined her. When we came back to pick her up, the groomer said that was aggressive all throughout and tried to bite her several times. They eventually put a dog muzzle on her. My mom and I were so surprised by this because she has NEVER showed any aggression towards a human or towards any of her previous groomers. In fact, she loves being cuddled by other people and goes to people whenever we're at a dog park. \n\nWhat do you guys think went wrong and what could I do for the next appointment?\nAt first I thought it was because of her matted fur. The groomer shot this theory down and said that my dog was aggressive even after getting the matted hair out.  She has also been a lot more matted before (the very first time when she was a puppy) and had never had aggression issues. Or could it be that she was gone for the groomers for too long and didn't feel comfortable in a relatively new environment with a different groomer? Or could it also be the groomer herself, and that my dog just didn't like her? The previous groomer didn't have any issues. \n\nWhat should I do the next time we go to the groomers? It will be a new groomer again and I hope she doesn't lash out. Will she be able to feel comfortable again? I'm scared that if she becomes too aggressive, no one will take her... :(", "summary": "My bichonpoo shows aggression for the first time with a new groomer. she has never ever been aggressive towards humans or any other groomers. What does this mean and what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2h3to7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend [22M] of 3 years emotionally cheated on me [22F] a few months ago. We're trying to work things out but I need help getting past this.", "post": "A few months ago, I found out my boyfriend was talking to some girl and flirting with her. I don't want to go into too much details about how I found out, but we had a period of about 3 weeks where we weren't talking too much because we were trying to figure things out. I know that while we weren't talking too much (and not officially on a break or broken up), he basically made her into his girlfriend. It really bothers me. Sometimes I'm just doing something random and my mind automatically goes back to that and I end up depressed. I keep getting paranoid and thinking that while I might be occupied with something else, he might go back and talk to her. He already said it was a huge mistake and that no one could ever replace me. It was just that new experience of a crush but it was stupid. I just need some help so I don't have to get so depressed and we can move ahead. I know it's getting better with time, but is there something that can help me just move past the hurt that's still in me?", "summary": "Boyfriend cheated. We're working through it, but I need a little help getting over the last bit of hurt."}
{"id": "t3_4mz55n", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Decisions regarding a 401k Cash out", "post": "Hi r/personal finance,\n\nI have been looking for guidance on this issue, but do not have a financial planner currently. I am a 26 year old male looking to leave my current job. To bring you up to pace, I am an insurance adjuster for a major insurance company in America. I took a promotion about 9-10 months ago that I am now regretting. Without getting into any details on why I am looking outside the company, I have a financial dilemma that may not allow me to leave at this time.\n\nI currently make about $46,700. I currently have no savings to my name due to some financial hardships over the past few months. I have been contributing to a 401k for 2 years now (6% by me, 6% company match). There was a part in time that I was only giving 5% but my company still matched.\n\nAnyhow, I have about $7,700 in my 401k with Fidelity. I know their fee is typically 10% early withdrawal + a 20% withholding to the IRS.\n\nI have applications out to about 7 other positions that I feel confident match my skill set. In the mean time, if I wanted to quit my job currently, would it be a poor decision to cash out my 401k to make an emergency fund? From my calculations, the amount I would receive would be enough to cover at least 3 month living expenses plus I have at least another pay check coming.", "summary": "Is it a bad decision to cashout a 401k fund after only 2 years of investing to create an emergency fund?"}
{"id": "t3_wwd84", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So today I was behind a guy in a construction zone doing something I had always wanted to do...   What are the things that other drivers do (even if they don't know it) that drive you crazy?", "post": "So, in queue during construction just now, waiting for traffic to funnel down to one lane and the guy in font of me starts to swerve into the lane that is ending (as if to cut to the front and lessen his wait). Half in the other lane, half in ours, he is almost hit by a guy flying to the front of the line. (being almost hit by two other drivers from Iowa just 5 mins earlier I wasn't surprised that they didn't slow as they swerved around him.) I honk assuming he doesn't see the guy coming but he just glances at me in his side view and stays his course, causing about 4 semis and 8 other cards to swerve around him. Once the lane clears he finishes his lane change and does the one thing I wasn't expecting... he paces me. For the remaining mile of the lane only two cars get close enough to us to be forced into the queue behind me. The rest of the traffic in that lane notices what he is doing and starts merging a good 100 yards behind us.  \n  \nThis is one thing that has *ALWAYS* annoyed the hell out of me, When given MILES of warning that the lane will end people will always drive to the end of the lane and slow the traffic to a stop while the *nice* people let them in at the front of the queue.", "summary": "Guy in front of me takes to the lane that will end, paces me, and forces all of the line jumpers to queue up behind us.  "}
{"id": "t3_ua7dx", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Questions about a 1 month old kitten that seems to have a cold.", "post": "After a bout of parasites the moment I rescued him from a box, he's been growing healthier, heavier and more active each day. But he'd have this weird sort of rasp towards the end of his meow SOMETIMES, as well as some red around his eyes. I thought it was very unusual, so I took him to the vet for a regular check up just to make sure.\n\nThe vet couldn't see him that night, but he had an assistant prescribe some eye drops (twice a day) and a shot of penicillin for just in case, and then bring him back in the following day. I did as told, all the while keeping an eye on his behavior and bowel movements, etc. \n\nThe next day, Saturday, the doctor personally checked his lungs for any rumbling/bubbling, but couldn't seem to find anything. He took his temperature and that came out fine as well, along with absolutely no parasites in the fecal test. BUT he gave my kitten another shot of penicillin just in case it was something building up.\n\nIs it safe to say that the penicillin couldn't target the beginning of what seemed like an Upper Respiratory Infection, or that he may have a cat rhinovirus?\n\nSymptoms:\n\n- Rasp at the end of meow, almost never throughout the meow. \n\n- No fever. No lethargy. No loss of appetite, no irregular bowel movements.\n\n- I just today heard what seemed like a small cough, but otherwise no wheezing, no panting after being incredibly active, no rumbling in chest while sleeping.\n\n- Discharge from eyes as well as some red, but these have been getting better with the eye drops.\n\n- A bit of a stuffy nose, but not a runny nose. \n\nDiet: \n\n- Science Diet canned food four times a day.\n\n- Kitten Milk replacement about twice as a treat. \n\n- Bowl of fresh water out always.", "summary": "Kittens seems to have a cold, was given a checkup with normal results, but received two shots of penicillin just in case."}
{"id": "t3_3ogtxs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] wife [22F] of 2 years loves her siblings [14M and 16F] more than me. I feel bad.", "post": "My wife (Sally) has two half siblings. They live on a different continent. Sally moved to the US 3 years ago. She is from here but her mom and siblings are not. She often says that her only regret about moving here is not seeing her siblings grow up.\n\nSally and her sister talk about twice a week but message each other more than that (it's never a nuisance, I want them to talk and it doesn't effect the time we spent together). She plays games on Steam with her brother cause he doesn't like talking on the phone. This bothers me cause she doesn't even like video games and I always have to ask her to play, but she asks her brother on her own. They play maybe once a week for several hours when I'm at work.\n\nMy wife and her sisters were very close growing up. They have these weird made up words and inside jokes. Also no harm there. That's great.\n\nSo last week my wife was chatting with her sister, who was feeling down about her looks. My sister said something to the extent of 'you're one of the most beautiful girls I know and I love you and *brother* more than anything'. I jokingly said 'well I hope that I'm a close second'. Sally replied 'yes, you are!' and went in for a hug. \n\nI feel annoyed and sad. I have an older sister but I love Sally more than anyone! \n\nI don't know if this matters but Sally and I are childfree. We both like kids and have already talked about what we'd do if something happened to her mom and stepdad. We'd take on the kids, without a doubt.\n\nBut I feel slighted. I don't want to bring it up cause it seems ridiculous. Am I wrong to feel this way?", "summary": "= wife said that she loves her siblings more than me. I feel resentful. Is this jealous/controlling or justified?"}
{"id": "t3_2ly9ip", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F], my SO [23 M] 6 months, the dreaded 'where will this relationship go' talk.", "post": "Here are the facts. \n-Our relationship is about to become a long distance relationship next year. My SO will have to leave for about 2~3 years(this is not definite, might be longer) to a place around five to six different time zones away. \n\n-A LDR is not a deal breaker for either of us. BUT, if I'm going to be in a LDR in my mid 20s (and  thus alone for 95% of the time because we'll only be able to see each other maybe once for a few days every three months-and that's when we're lucky), I need the other person to be somebody incredibly special, someone I want in my life for a very long time. \n\n-I want my SO in my life. \n\n-I don't know if this is possible because of our different religions.\n (I have no religion, he is a devout Christian)\n\n-I believe differences in beliefs can have a less impact in short-term relationships but have to be talked about in long term relationships. \n\nSo I'm thinking we need to have a 'where will/can this relationship go' talk before we commit ourselves in a LDR. Lay down our expectations, set out the rules, talk about our futures, and if it shows absolutely no hope of working out, then break it off for the sake of each other. \n\nI'm not conflicted on whether I should talk to him but when to. He will leave in three months. Should I have the talk now and get over it, or should I enjoy the time we have together now and leave the conversation until a few weeks before he leaves?", "summary": "Can't commit to a LDR relationship without clearing up different religion issues. Should I talk about this with him right now or enjoy the time together for now and tackle it later?"}
{"id": "t3_3et8qw", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Appraisal \"Subject To\" issues", "post": "We are in the process of buying a bank owned home. The house is in great condition with the exception of the basement. There is a water issue. It is not a finished basement, just basic cement floor/walls.\n\n Every day we had been there the basement was dry. The home inspector did find that a downspout in one corner was too short and is likely causing the source of a potential water issue. As it happened, the appraiser showed up the morning after some seriously heavy rain and there was a small puddle in that same corner with the short downspout. He made the appraisal subject to \"identification and remediation\" of the water in the basement.\n\nAfter jumping through the mortgage company's many (and changing) hoops, it is becoming clear we simply wont be satisfying their requirements and therefore wont be getting the loan through them.\n\nSo my big question is: Since this entire issue would never have come up if not for unlucky timing of the appraiser, I'd like to work with the selling bank to get the basement sealed and the downspouts fixed which should fix the water issue (mortgage was pressing for full 4-wall $$$ drainage system). Is it at all illegal to do this before finding another bank who will then order another appraisal? It's a genuine fix but feels a little like covering the issue up. Nothing that wouldn't happen if actual sellers were selling the place but still...", "summary": "if one appraiser has an issue with basement, can I fix it and get a different appraiser with a different bank to re-appraised after fixed?"}
{"id": "t3_21zojc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [22/F] show him [24/M] that I appreciate him?", "post": "So I met this guy on NYE and we have been talking ever since. We're not officially dating or anything but are in a kind of pseudo relationship. Issue is we live 7 hours away so most of our relationship is via text/Skype/calling. \n\nI've been going through a pretty hard time in my life lately and he has been nothing but amazing and supportive of me through everything. I think I've lost count of the amount of times I've called him upset or texted him upset and had him call me with kind words. He has been supportive as I search for jobs even though he knows I may end up moving to the other side of the country. \n\nI feel pretty awful going to him with things all of the time and want to find some way to show him that I care (he strikes me as more of an actions rather than words guy). How can I **show** him that I appreciate him? I would send him something to his apartment but I don't know the address. I do, however, know where he works since he just started a new job. Would it be weird if I sent him chocolates or something to work? Is that creepy or cute? Or what else could I do? I tell him how great he is all the time but I feel like that doesn't really resonate with him.", "summary": "Not-boyfriend has been supportive during my month long breakdown. How can I show him it means a lot to me?"}
{"id": "t3_2w19dh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [24 M] and dating seriously for the first time with [22 M]. Not sure he's over his ex", "post": "I recently came out at the beginning of last year and had just been playing the field until I met this new guy in January. He's a great guy- he's handsome, smart and fun and the feelings seem to be mutual since we see each other several times a week on average. \n\nOn our first date he mentioned that he had just recently gotten out of a year long relationship but he didn't say much and appeared to be over it. However, as we spent more time together he began to talk a lot more about his ex and I got the impression that he was still struggling to detach himself emotionally. \n\nIt's very awkward for me to listen to him talk about his past relationship. On the one hand, I've never had a serious relationship and can't really empathize with the healing process. But beyond that, it makes me feel like a second banana- like I'm just a guy he's spending time with to rebound and soften the blow of his breakup. I could just be acting dramatically, but it's how I feel at times.\n\nHe's still dealing with a lot of anger. The ex pissed him off somehow earlier this week and he read me an extensive collection of expletive filled, angry texts he sent to the guy. It was startling and really made me realize that this is a potential problem. Things are still good between us and I like him a lot but I'm worried. \n\nI just wanted some feedback. What is my course of action? Should I distance myself or try to work through it?", "summary": "First time seriously dating a guy, but he recently broke up with his bf of one year and he's not over it. Don't really know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_q4vxb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Just broke up with girlfriend of 4 years; Just realized have no life and few friends. How do I fix this?", "post": "I never was what one would call cool... but I certainly used to have much more of a social life than I am left with now. I started dating an out of town girl during high school and now as a sophomore in college, I find myself very alone. I didn't make the effort to have a life outside of this girl before and I'm realizing what a big mistake that was. \n\nAnyway, how I got here isn't that important, I need now to just change this state I'm in. But I don't really know how to do that. I have some friends at school, but no one close other than my room mate. I'm a comp sci student so that doesn't really help anything (Insert SOP programmer joke here).  \n\nI don't care about a romantic relationship at all  at this point, I need some time I know to get over this girl, but how do I just... meet people? I really don't care to get drunk and that seems to be what a lot of the social scene is built around. I love disc golf and play it a good bit, with other people even, but the disc golf scene around here is mostly 40-50 yr old men...\n\ni haven't really made a friend in years. My current 'friend group' is really just the people my room mate knows and a few people from my HS who came to my college that I'm not that close with.", "summary": "I suddenly find myself with no life, few friends, and nothing to do but code and play dg with middle aged men. How do I make friends?"}
{"id": "t3_1hanb5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What happens when a car buyer doesn't transfer the title and sells it again?", "post": "I sold my car to someone a few months back. Let's call him Bob. I signed over the title to Bob and made him sign a bill of sale/notice of transfer. I got three copies, one of which I mailed to the tax collector's office the next day. I didn't hear anything from either the Bob or the tax collector for nearly two months. Then today, a friend of a Bob came by and said that Bob sold it to someone else, Jim. Bob never transferred thr title over to himself when he bought the car. Instead, he sold it to Jim. Jim tried to go get tags in his name, but can't because the title is still under my name. Bob and friend gave Jim my number and said that they aren't going to deal with the situation and Bob changed his number.Now Jim wants me to go with him to the DMV and sign the title over to him. That isn't legal, I think. Because I sold the car to Bob, and I already turned in the bill of sale/notice of transfer to the tax collector So isn't this out of my control and Bob's problem? I guess my question is what do I do about this, if anything at all? I Live in Florida if that's relevant.", "summary": "Sold my car to Bob. He didn't register the car in his name and sold to to Jim. Bob changed his number  and now Jim is bothering me. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_26sbv9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Update: I [20M] was recently dropped by my therapist because he couldn't deal with me. I made a thread asking for advice. Multiple things has happened since then.", "post": "Original Post: \n\nI contacted my therapist yesterday and visited the hospital to speak with him. He has agreed to take me back after I showed him the thread which I printed off. \n\nHe said this was way more serious than I had let on and that my medication might need to be adjusted along with some additional medications. He didn't says specifically what though because he obviously can't prescribe medication. He scheduled me and said he would talk to my psychologist", "summary": "My therapist took me back, he might recommend me inpatient therapy after he talks to my psychologist, and I am now volunteering at the nursing home (visiting) and animal shelter."}
{"id": "t3_ntivd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, do my coursemates have the right to ask our university for a different professor?", "post": "So we're taking this chem class. Our batch is divided into two blocks. We're under this professor who is also teaching the same subject to chem majors. He also uses the same grading system he uses with chem majors with us. Most of our block is failing and can't keep up. I can say that I can keep up because I was able to take this subject back when I was in high school. But what about my blockmates? They're requesting for a different teacher, the same one as the other block.\n\nBut this has me thinking. Is this right? I mean, it's a pro that we're getting the same amount of knowledge the chem majors get. Is it really valid if our only problem is that most of us our failing? \n\nI'm having a debate over this with my friend. If you need extra info about the case, I'll just keep you posted.\n\nWhat I think is that there will be subjects where the teacher will be unfair or the subject is hard in college and sometimes we just have to go through it. But then my friend called me insensitive to my blockmates who I'm close with because most of them are failing and I'm sticking with the 'they should just try and get through it' mindset.\n\nAny teachers out there? What do you have on the matter? How about students who may have experienced something similar, any advice?", "summary": "Is it right to request for a different chem prof because he's teaching us the same thing he's teaching the chem majors and my blockmates are having a hard time keeping up?   "}
{"id": "t3_hnv2e", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Embedded Youtube Vids don't work if ANY google cookies allowed session-only. What?!", "post": "I have Firefox \"ask me every time\" a site tries to set a cookie, I can allow, deny, or allow until the end of the session (I close my browser).\n\nI set most cookies from Google to allow for session. If I have any Google cookies set to allow for session, EMBEDDED youtube videos do not work. I get an error message that reads \"An error occured. Please try again later\".\n\nThe pattern is consistant, and the videos work if I watch them directly on Youtube.\n\nDoes anyone know why this is? Is my experience an enigma or common to anyone else? Is Google punishing me for not allowing their tracking completely?\n\nThanks.", "summary": "If Google cookies are set to expire at the end of a browser session, youtube embeds don't work. I'm confused."}
{"id": "t3_1gi3zq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Make it or break it; different during marriage?", "post": "I had a conversation with a mentor of mine a while back about partners and \"deal-breakers\" that merit automatic termination of the relationship.  I know that people think harder about splitting up if they're married rather than dating if someone is found having cheated, but what about situations like the following?  My mentor was describing a situation to me where her husband had lied to her about selling one of their vans in order to get an SUV for their growing family.  It was one of those scooby-doo kind of vans that had fuzzy carpet inside.  She forgave him, even though she was really pissed off about 1) him not selling the van and 2) lying about it.  This is context of the van being disputed between them for several years, and it was obvious that their family needed a more family friendly car.  Now with that said... she said that if this had happened while they were dating, and that she had seen these kind of qualities from him before their wedding, she would have broken up with him right away.  Of course since they ARE married, they worked on it and patched things up.", "summary": "Are the \"deal-breakers\" for whether or not people continue to be together different for dating and marriage?  I want to hear your stories."}
{"id": "t3_xcp4o", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[26/m] Need advice. Make the leap with [25/f]... or not?", "post": "Thanks for taking the time to read this; its not something I really feel comfortable asking friends or family.\n\nI graduated college a year ago and moved about 2000 miles from home. My girlfriend still lives there, and we've been doing the long distance thing since I moved. She's graduating college this coming fall and the plan is (and has always been) that she would move in with me out here on the west coast. \n\nThe problem is that its a huge commitment, and I'm not sure I'm ready to make it. We've been together since we started college, so 4 years now, and our relationship is good by all measures. We don't fight often, and we get along in most ways. But if she moves out here, its solely for me. Her job prospects aren't as good as they would be in our home state, and she knows nobody here but me. I'm not sure if the grass would be greener elsewhere; I've met girls since I moved here who I seem to have more in common with.\n\nHalf of me thinks it would be crazy to throw away a healthy long term relationship just because I don't feel ready for it, and the other half of me thinks that if I have doubts now, it's just going to get worse over time, and it would be unfair to bring her here now.\n\nHas anyone been in a similar situation? How have things turned out? Any advice at all?\n\nAgain, I really appreciate your reading this. I feel like I don't really have anyone else to ask, and its consuming my thoughts.", "summary": "Girlfriend is ready to uproot herself and move five states away to be with me, and I'm not sure I'm ready for the commitment."}
{"id": "t3_4pe3ee", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] with my GF [17F] , She told me her and her ex had sex up until about a month before we started talking.", "post": "Me and my girlfriend started talking to each other around march and started dating at the end of March. So we have been dating almost 3 months now. Other than me, she has only had one long term relationship and it was far longer, they dated for 2 years. The reason they broke up is her boyfriend didn't know what he wanted to be gender wise. She wasn't the one who broke up with him and she was clearly upset about it for a long time. \n\nShe broke up with her boyfriend around summer of 2015. So it was pretty recently, but I learned yesterday that they had been having sex since they broke up up until January/February of 2016. She and her ex do still talk over snapchat and text messaging, but it's pretty rare and from what I have seen the little conversations they do have aren't inappropriate and more of a conversation friends would have. \n\nWhat is bothering me is her explanation for why she wouldn't have sex with him again, she said she would have no reason to since she now can have sex with me whenever she wants. The reason this bugs me so much is she is planning on going on either a year long or summer long trip after she graduates. And I won't see her at all or very little during that time, and if she has no problem with emotionless sex I am concerned cheating is a very real possibility.\n\nHowever this is my first real relationship and I may just be insecure.", "summary": "Girlfriend had sex with ex/bf sex buddy up until a month before we started talking. She still talks with that ex/bf in a non-romantic way"}
{"id": "t3_4zjsaa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (m/23) feeling anxious ALL the time about things not working out with new GF (f/21) of 1.5 months", "post": "Long story short: Was in a very, very unhealthy relationship in the past and have not been with anyone for about 2 years after it ended. Met \"Jane\" online and we developed/are developing very rapidly, emotionally, sexually, etc., and it already feels like the healthiest relationship I have ever been in. \n\nRecently she told me she loved me (this is very soon I know, but like I said, rapidly developing) and it kinda freaked me out initially as that has never happened so quickly for me, but the more I thought about it the more I realized I felt the same way and also loved her. \n\nSo far the relationship has had virtually no problems, we are very similar in personality, have a lot of fun together, like to spend a lot of time together, we communicate our feelings well (maybe not me so much if I'm typing this right now...), are physically compatible, the list goes on. She is also VERY affectionate (which I love actually) and tells me fairly regularly how great she thinks I am, how happy she is we are together, and how she loves me. \n\nYet despite all the 'green flags' if you will, and all these great things she tells me, I'm CONSTANTLY anxious and worried about things not working out, or that things are going to just fizzle out.\n\n I know she is being honest with me about how she feels, and when we are together things are fantastic, but every time I'm alone these worries seem to seep in. I just feel like after so many bad relationships this seems to good to be true, and have the constant thought in my head of \"Yeah this is amazing, but surely something bad is going to happen, there's no way such a good thing can last.\" \n\nNot really sure if I'm looking for advice or just venting, but I hate how anxious this makes me and wish I could just relax and enjoy what is so far a really, really great thing. I also wish I could just let go of my mistrust of other people and fully trust her emotionally.", "summary": "Cant shake thoughts that new relationship might be too good to be true, and will inevitably fall apart with my new girlfriend, despite all the really great things about the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_3krhxb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my SO [28M] duration, 2 years, he wants to give his mother money", "post": "I'm hopelessly in love with my SO \"John\". We are moving in together soon and I am convinced he is the one I will marry.\n\nThe main issue is his mother. She is a nice person, and I do like her. My issue is that he wants to help her financially. She lives in another city, does have a job, and could be working more hours, but doesn't. She also receives money from the government and spoils her other son (17) because he has some form of depression.\n\nMy boyfriend just recently got a graduate job in his field and excitedly told me that he has always wanted to help financially support his mother and siblings (17M and (22F) because they are not exactly well off (but I have lived relatively comfortably With similar income as a student). I realise it's his money and his choice, but I am against it.\n\nMy father has always given money to his family, and they spend it on alcohol and stuff like that and keep begging for more and more. They don't look for work and those who do have jobs only do the bare minimum and have turned down shifts. It has caused a lot of issues in my parents's marriage, and I've known from a young age that I do not want that in my future.\n\nAm I a bad person for not wanting him to fund his family? Is it a normal thing to do? He recently bought his mother $400 worth of electronics because he thought she'd like it (no occassion) but he has never spent over $70 on one occasion for me. He won't even pay for a date, we always go Dutch (which I am okay with). For the record, i have bought him a gift over $400.\n\nI want to tell him that I do not want to spend my life, or be long term, with someone who will send their family money. It has only bought negatives into my family and I think I will start to resent his mother for it. Am I just a bad person or is it justified?\n\nI will add that I think giving financial support to parents when they are elderly is something I am completely okay with. Just not when they are still capable of working.", "summary": "SO wants to give financial support to his family long term/forever. I'm not okay with that because of my family's history. Am I wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_3vf8pg", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by thinking the worst of my local dimsum (momos) vendor.", "post": "The story starts back in the summer but the conclusion happened half an hour ago so I think this counts.\n\nI live in New Delhi, paradise for street food lovers. Most neighbourhood markets have tons of stalls that sell all kinds of street food. My favourite stall was a stone's throw from my house. The vendors, a friendly couple, sold tandoori momos- chicken/vegetarian momos heated over a flame till they were lightly roasted and doused with delicious spicy cream (sort of like white sauce). I'd have them at least once a week and I couldn't be happier.\n\nAnd then the worst happened. I went to the spot one day and they weren't there. I thought they might've taken a day off and thought nothing of it. But then it happened the next time I went there too and I was forced to turn to the other stalls that sold pani puri.  \n\nEvery week I'd drive by and look for that stall and come home resigned that they were nowhere to be found. I thought of asking the stalls nearby about their whereabouts but never got around to it. I assumed that they had left to a more popular market or maybe even saved up enough for a better life. I looked for similar stalls that sold tandoori momos but to no avail. \n\nToday I walked by that place for the first time in ages. I looked longingly at the place the stall used to be. Then I noticed a new stall to my left, the other side of the pavement. Beside that was another stall and another and finally THE TANDOORI MOMOS STALL!\n\nMy heart started thumping and I ran over and told them that I thought they had moved. The look at me with a half amused half pitying expression- \"We've been right here.\"\n\nTurns out that I was so fixated on that exact spot that I couldn't look 20 feet ahead to where they had relocated. All the stalls had shifted together to the other side of the pavement to an empty spot that was previously used by a restaurant. \n\nI'm an idiot but I totally had an orgasm when I tasted the first creamy hot chicken tandoori momo after 3 terrible months.", "summary": "Favorite street food stall suddenly disappears, lose my mind and curse them for moving only to realise 3 months later that they've been on the other side of the pavement the whole time."}
{"id": "t3_2jumua", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my [20F] girlfriend for 1 1/2 years, I caught her texting the guy she originally broke up with me for", "post": "I've been dating this girl for a while longest relationship I have ever been in. I honestly can say that she's my first true love. But this girl has done some unfair things to me. \n\n In January she broke up with me because as she claimed \" I don't treat her like she's my girlfriend.\" About a month later we work it out and continue things back up. I then found out the truth about why we broke up, it was another dude. I was literally destroyed, that month we broke up was one of the hardest months of my life. I thought it was my fault I lost my girl, so I fixed it only to find out it wasn't me it was someone else. But that's not all. I forgive her because I love her so much and she promised to block all communications from him. Then I go and see on her Facebook she was messaging some guy (not the dude she ended it for) and she was telling him that if he was living near her it would be him and not me.  Confronted her about it and still forgave her. Well since there is no trust anymore I checked her Facebook last night. And she had messages from 2 months ago saying that they would hangout. \"He said why don't why hangout is it because of your bf?\" And she said no. \n\nNow here's the tricky part. \n\nI plan on ending it probably this week. But I have a good paying job for my age but unfortunately it drug tests randomly. So I have to quit but it's gonna be a lot harder to get her off my mind that way.  My intentions were to move after I believe I have enough money to move out and live with my best friend. But if I end it with her there is nothing left for me In this town and l probably will be extremely depressed. Regardless I need to end it but should I go quit my job with only 2 months experience but 6 in a industrial warehouse and move? \n\nNeed help reddit please help!", "summary": "My gf is texting the dude she dumped me originally for and im conflicted on where to go next with work and other things."}
{"id": "t3_1kmivw", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Bad night/ Obsessed with the scale", "post": "First post here in loseit. I'm hoping I can lean on you guys a bit during this fight we are all fighting. Because I SO need it more than I'd like to admit. It seems I've become addicted to the scale. Like seriously addicted. And I've found that at different times of day I weigh more or less. But last night I totally lost it. Scale told me I'd gained 3 lbs and this morning they suddenly disappeared. But last night those numbers absolutely killed me. I was pissed, I was sad, I was depressed, I couldn't sleep. The number haunted me so badly. I have restricted my caloric intake a LOT and increased my physical activity from swimming a few times a week to swimming harder more times a week with the addition of classes at the gym. \n\nSome background- I lost all of the weight once. Got down to 17/F/130 and had someone taking candid pictures of me from the side to show how fat I still was. Definitely takes a toll on one's self image. Now I am 24 and got up to 252. And it sucks. I've lost a few lbs, track my calories in MFP, exercise. It just isn't coming off. And now I am obsessed with the scale. The scale that could be lying to me. It will always be in the house, so I cannot really just toss it (it isn't mine personally) and I have become so reliant on it to tell me I'm doing a good job. It's ridiculous. I had a NSV when I could shimmy on some shorts I bought 6 years ago, but for some reason that damn scale is haunting me day in and day out. Any advice for getting through the \"setbacks\" and feeling like crap days? And how I can feel like I've accomplished something without looking at the scale?", "summary": "Cannot accept NSVs unless there is an accompanying SV. The scale is my addiction. Looking for advice on how to get through the bad feeling days and get back on track."}
{"id": "t3_2na2r3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my mother [49F] and my sister [27F], Mother is paying for a trip to another country for her and my sister but not me? What do I do?", "post": "I am currently in college with a 3.8 gpa. I work, go to school, and practice singing; I am a well rounded individual.  My sister is 27, stuck working for my parents, and is possibly the laziest person I know. \n\n Anyways I have always wanted to go to this particular country.  My mother has known my obsession for this country and its culture.  My uncle lives in this country and is getting married next summer!  My sister lied to me saying she opened a credit card to pay for her trip to this wedding.  I can't afford it because I am a poor college kid that can only pay her rent and basic necessities.  My parents are relatively wealthy.  \n\nToday I found a receipt for a trip to this country in my mother's email (it was open on a computer at home), the email included two plane tickets, my sister's name on one of them.  I called my mom asking her why she would do this and not pay for me to go because she knows how much I love this particular country.  She quickly lied and said \"I didn't pay for it\" then hung up. Total lie.  Her credit card receipt for two tickets is clearly in the email.  I am so angry and hurt.  I believe in being fair.  I don't understand why she would pay for my sister's trip but not mine. My sister is 27 years old, shouldn't she pay for her own way?! \n\nMy mother has bought my sister and I both cars and trips to Europe during college.  My mother even took her on a free trip from her work, but not me.  What am I doing wrong?  I do everything right and yet I still get the short end of the stick.  I am so mad, I am thinking of just cutting ties and never talking to my mother again.  Never doing anything for her again.  I am sick of doing everything right and everything going to someone else that doesn't want it as much as I do.", "summary": "Mother lies and pays for a trip for her and my deadbeat 27yro sister to gone on a trip to a country I have always wanted to visit."}
{"id": "t3_skk5j", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I don't \"think\" he likes me, but it's been different lately and I don't know if I should just go for it and ask him out. Need advice.", "post": "I'm a 15 year old girl that has liked the same boy for 3 years, passionately. However, he doesn't like me, as far as I know. I sort of asked him out before, ages ago. He said no. Back then, he was very cold to me and we were having a bad time in our friendship. We fell out, because his friends disliked me and I annoyed him or something like that. \n\nNow, he is friends with me again. We are closer. However, the way he's acting with me has changed. He sits more open and talks to me all the time, he does things to get my attention and he stares at me in the eyes while smiling at me. He'll pretend to be cold, but he'll have a little smirk on his face, but not a rude one.\n\nI like this new change. It seems he has forgotten about our argument and my love. People have mentioned it to him, he doesn't say anything. During a conversation with a group about partners and sex, he said to me that \"he might be a tiger in bed\". He's being sweeter, nicer and a little bit...cheeky.\n\nI am getting sick of lying and denying my feelings for him, I just want to tell him, but I'm scared that it will all go bad again. I'm more mature now, but I still fear rejection.\n\nWhat do you think these changes mean? Do you think I should tell him?", "summary": "My cold-hearted friend has now become friendly, passionate and cheeky. I am getting tired of denying my feelings. Should I just tell him?"}
{"id": "t3_2rrmf3", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Need advice! [m24] with [f23]. Trying get a real date! (unique situation?)", "post": "So long story short, this girl is roomates with my sister's friend.  We all meet up for a bar crawl.  Initially, I'm not that into her, but after talking the whole night, decide to take a chance on her.  Really cool, really fun, very cute.  Eventually, the whole group fizzles out, except for the girl, myself, and someone else.  Eventually I grab her to start dancing at a club, and whilst dancing, I go in for the kiss.  It gets really hot and heavy and we find the lounge area and start full on making out.  At the end of the night, we ride the train back, go our separate ways, and exchange numbers w/ a goodbye kiss.  After christmas, we make plans to hangout.  \n\nIt's a busy time of year so we don't hang out until New Years, where she texts me to come see her.  We're both in the same city, but just different bars, so after a journey, I finally wind up at the same bar.  We're talking, hanging out, having a good time.  As we leave the bar(we're in a group at this point), I pull her aside and kiss her, and we proceed to make out and hold hands for a bit.  We continue to hangout that night, which ends with a very nice goodbye kiss yet again.\n\nA couple days later, we're hanging out for a mutual friend's birthday. We're there with a group of people we don't know, so we cling to each other, joking and laughing, enjoying each other's company.  We don't really kiss or do anything intimate, but we danced a little before leaving.  Shared a cab back, a brief kiss goodbye.\n\nSo... we make plans to meet on friday (tomorrow), and I ask her if she'd like to get dinner.  Says we should meet for drinks because she may have plans afterwards.  This would technically be a first date.  Should I ask her more upfront to go out on a date sometime or take the drinks for a bit tomorrow?  Is her interest waning? Am I being paranoid?", "summary": "made out with girl at club. made out several more times upon future days hanging out.  Want to go out on a date, but not sure if she's still interested."}
{"id": "t3_3m97dt", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[Vent] Angry at my dog", "post": "I'm starting to get really angry at my dog, and I know it's not all his fault.  He knocked my two year old son down the stairs yesterday when my wife, my son and I were going down the stairs.  My son starting to go down our carpeted stairs and my dog ran down the stairs as he does and knocked my son down them.  It was one of the worse experiences of my life, but luckily my son rolled like a log, rather than end over end.\n\nI'm having difficulty getting over it, and forgiving my dog.  My wife seems to be OK with him and my son still loves him.  I was having doubts last week about us being the right family for him, but my wife talked me up and talked about how much our son loves him.  He was my dog, my birthday present this year after never having a dog in my life and always wanting one.\n\nI don't know what to do, I was furious yesterday.  It's eased a bit, but I can't help thinking about the incident from yesterday every so often today.  I was shaking I was so mad...  What do I do?", "summary": "Dog knocked two year old son down carpeted stairs.  Son is OK, but I'm so angry and resentful towards my dog still."}
{"id": "t3_3ocz7c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my fiance [27F] of a year, I feel like my school obligations are affecting our relationship.", "post": "I'm studying engineering, on my second year of a four or five year degree. Engineering is not an easy major and on top of that I'm also working as a lab tech, a tutor, and participating in a NASA competition/scholarship. As you can guess, I'm a busy guy and even when I come home for the day, I typically have work to do until 6-8pm. \n\nI do my best however to make sure that my Friday evenings and all day Saturday are free for me and my fiance to spend time together. Even when I'm working in the evenings it's not like we're very far apart, we have an open concept apartment and I'm typically just ten feet away at the kitchen table doing my thing while she watches TV in the living room. We're even going camping next weekend because I wanted to spend more time with her. \n\nEven then, she *constantly* pesters with questions about my progress. Every ten or fifteen minutes she'll ask me where I'm at and how much farther I have to go. It breaks my concentration and I feel guilty when I take a break and don't want to sit with her and watch netflix, I just want to play a little CS:GO or maybe take the dog for a walk. \n\nToday, after the fifth time of her asking me what problem I was on in my programming homework I kinda snapped and told her, in a raised but not yelling voice, \"I have a shit ton of homework, I always have a shit ton of homework, and you asking me how much more I have to do doesn't get it done any faster!\" I know that wasn't the right thing to do but I'm just tired of her questioning, it makes me feel like I'm lazy or not working hard enough for her, and I already have enough pressure to perform from myself and school. I know I need to make some changes but I'm not sure what those changes should be.", "summary": "I'm an extremely busy engineering student and I feel like my fiance is guilt tripping me for having to work so much."}
{"id": "t3_pduer", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the worst thing you've ever seen a cop do?", "post": "I'm sure that there are good cops out there, but for the most part I've only come in contact with bad ones. What's your worst cop story? I'll start:\n\nI was at a T intersection late at night, waiting to turn left onto the main (horizontal part of the T) road. There was one car ahead of me and when the light turned green and the first car started to turn left, a cop car came barrelling through the intersection at high speed without any lights (including headlights!) or sirens on. Luckily the person in front of me had quick reflexes and slammed on the brakes, otherwise I'm pretty sure the cop would have seriously injured him or her.", "summary": "Cop ran a red light at high speed in the middle of the night without headlights on and nearly hit a car making a legal left turn."}
{"id": "t3_1hlyo5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/f] Says she's in love with me [18/m] but isn't ready for a relationship, even though we basically are in one.", "post": "So I've been seeing this girl for a little while now and lately it's been almost everyday. 3 months ago she broke up with her boyfriend of one year and we were friends and talking during that time but since they broke up we have been talking more and more and now it feels pretty serious.\n\nSo last night we went out again and I asked her what she wanted out of this whole thing and she basically told me all the good things about me and that I'm the best guy she's ever dated and she doesn't want to stop hanging out with me, but she isn't ready for another relationship. Afterwards she messaged me and told me she thinks she's in love with me. \n\nShe tells me she likes me all the time and doesn't hide her feelings about me. \n\nMy question is, it already feels like a relationship so I don't get why she wouldn't want to put the label on it because it's not like we're hiding what we're doing from our friends and family. We are always messaging and whenever we have the chance we are together and we kiss and hold hands and act like boyfriend and girlfriend, even in front of our friends. I really like her and want her to be my girlfriend so I'd really appreciate any advice you have to give me on what I should do!\n\n[", "summary": "] She says I'm the perfect guy and she's in love with me but isn't ready for a relationship, even though we basically are in one."}
{"id": "t3_52r5r3", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Have I wasted my life away?", "post": "Greetings. I'm a 28 year old geology graduate, who thinks he's wasted his life away in a Red State.\n\nWhen I graduated from my local College, I was instantly afraid of not being able to pay back my student loan debt. It was $30k in total, but I've always been pretty impoverish in my life, so it was a pretty *scary* number at the time. I spent a month trying to find jobs in my field, but knew that the pay I was receiving at the time would never match what my federal obligation would be.\n\nSo I jumped into a career in electrical work due to the fact that it was the only full-time position I could get in my area. I left my first electrical employer due to some stupid personal decisions on my end (job scams are the suck), but managed to enter the IBEW apprenticeship program.\n\nNow, being in the apprenticeship program did help pay the bills, but I live in a Deep Red State, and our Union is weak as piss. While I had the chance to preform some degree related work for a year, my job negligence did cost me an opportunity with an employer. I never have been one to be good that the politics game. \n\nSo now, I've been laid off the third time this year, due to contractors in our Local Union not having enough work for our labor hands. I know I'm getting to the point of having to switch career paths again, but I don't know if I can still do what my degree is in since a bulk of my job experience is in construction.\n\nI don't mind sharing my [Linkden Profile] for those interested in seeing my career history (it's not 100% up-to-date, as you can tell).", "summary": "Have I fucked away 4 years of my life after college and screwed up any benefit towards having a degree, as well as my career?"}
{"id": "t3_2nswe9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26F] SO [27M] of four years is mad at me for not lying to his friends.", "post": "My SO was supposed to visit his best friends today, but held off because we were supposed to see each other. When our plans fell through, he decided to lie to his friends and say he was with me so he wouldn't have to go with them. I, however, was not informed of this lie.\n\nOne of his friends later texted me and asked me if he had already left, and I replied that I hadn't seen him. The two friends got mad at him for lying to them and ditching them, and then my SO got mad at me for not covering him.\n\nSince I wasn't aware of my SO's lie, I answered honestly. I told him this and he got mad for not telling him his friend texted me in the first place. What bothers me about this is the fact that I have to tell him someone talked to me, so he can then regulate my response. \n\nAm I simply overreacting, or is this something more serious?", "summary": "SO lied to best friends that he was with me, I told his friends he wasn't with me, now SO is mad at me for not lying, despite the fact that I didn't know about the lie in the first place."}
{"id": "t3_2bsox4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [00 M/F] with my ___ [00 M/F] duration, short-description", "post": "So my boyfriend and I met online about a year and a half ago. For half a year we skyped everyday and got to know each other. He flew out to meet my family before I decided to move in with him in a different state. Things went really well. We fought a lot in the beginning of our relationship but we grew a lot together and fell deeply in love. However, while we became too comfortable with each other, our financial situation has been declining in a bad way. We decided to call some family for a little extra help. My boyfriend spoke to his grandmother because they're really close. Her reaction was a bit different than expected, she told us if we wanted her help, my boyfriend would have to go back to his home state and prove himself in a sense. And that left me with no choice but to do the same thing and go back to my hometown. Now I feel like we were just hitting the peak of our relationship, we just celebrated one year together. The benefits of this are that, when we are together again we will hopefully have a house, we will be much more independent and hopefully more financially responsible. But I've never had to deal with something like this. It feels like a tidal wave. It almost doesn't feel like it's really happening. To top it off, o have to stay in his apartment five more days and the utilities were just shut off. So my question is how do you redditors deal with long distance relationships? I would do anything to be with this man. I keep telling myself it is only temporary but nothing feels the same without him here. I'm sure this sounds whiny and sad but that's because well, I am whiny and sad among 3 million other emotions. Help, redditors?", "summary": "My boyfriend and I are trying long distance until we can get on our feet and be together again. I've never dealt with distance like this. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2prmqo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think I [30's F] am screwing up the people I get into relationships with.", "post": "I've [30's F] been in 4 serious relationships. In all but the first, the men turned abusive, with the last relationship lasting over 10 years. The result is that I act like an abused woman. I duck, I dodge, I apologize. I know I am always in the wrong. I'll do anything to keep my SO happy.\n\nNow I'm in a new relationship with a [40's M]. He's the most patient man I have ever encountered, kind and caring... But the men I've been with before also seemed to care at first.\n\nHe asks me not to apologize for everything, he looks wounded when I flinch. He's never acted upset with me, but the second I think I may have done something wrong, I bolt back into my safe, contrite and submissive shell. And I can tell it bothers him. \n\nI want so much to be with him... But I'm afraid that I'll bring out an abusive side of him that he may not even have known existed. What if my tendencies make him mad and he eventually reacts the same way the others have? I'm afraid I'll DRIVE him to it. \n\nI'm fine with everyone else. I just... Don't know how to act in a relationship. I'm afraid I'll either chase him away while I learn how to be a normal person, or I'll turn him into something he doesn't want to be. How do I keep either from happening?", "summary": "I think I make men abusive. I don't want to be at fault for destroying another man, and I definitely don't want to lose him. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3oxu37", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [16/M] and my Girlfriend [16/F] has a best friend who is a guy [25/M]", "post": "My girlfriend and I have just started going out, it's been about 2 months and things have been going smoothly. She has a best friend who is also her older brothers [25] best friend too. She say's that he is like a cousin to her and that she'd never cheat because she knows how it feels to be cheated on, but I can't seem to 100% trust that statement. She talks to him a lot while she sometimes doesn't even reply to me when she's always on her phone texting him. \n\nI'm trying to believe her but due to past relationships, i feel like this will not go well at all. Is there anything I can do to relax and just realize that I am just overthinking things? Or is this something I should be concerned about", "summary": "girlfriend who has best guy friend who's 9 years older and talks to him alot more than me, wondering if i should be worried or not if she will cheat on me in the future."}
{"id": "t3_lpryf", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Student loans and Sallie Mae, I am doomed.", "post": "Not quite sure where to start but here it goes. I just graduated and got a decent job paying over 40k in an IT field right out of school; currently working for the City my university is in. Due to my parents making to much money and sinking the left over money they did have into a currently profitable business they started, I was left to pay for college on my own. My parents also made to much money during my schooling time for me to get any lower interest federal loans; because of how naive and stupid I was I decided that private student loans through Sallie Mae would be a good alternative, big fucking mistake. My loan principle right now is $94,000 with $16,000 in accrued interest over the 5 years I was in school ($20,000 a year tuition). Long story short my monthly payments will be well over half my monthly income roughly ~$1,200 a month. I have looked into extended repayment and interest only payments for the loans but that would only cut the monthly bill by ~$300 and in turn making my $94,000 turn into a fat $300,000 bill over 25 years; some of the loans have interest rates as high as 14%. With all of my bills (Rent, car, insurance, gas, food) I will be completely broke. I have looked into going through a few local credit unions to see if I can refinance  with the help of having both my parents co-sign but none of them will loan me that kind of money. So I ask you Reddit in all your infinite wisdom to brain storm with me on other possible ways I can go about paying this back. I am starting to get some serious anxiety from this and right now its killing my relationship with my long term girlfriend. I am in desperate need of some help, guidance, and anything else that will make me feel any better about this. Thanks!", "summary": "I was stupid and financed my college through Sallie Mae and now the payments per months are going to leave me completely broke with no end in site for paying off a $300,000 bill in my lifetime."}
{"id": "t3_1ncxq2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18f] ex [18m] says he misses me but he's over it.", "post": "My ex and I dated for 11 months and broke up almost a month ago because of college. We loved each other and it was amicable and everything. There were no hard feelings but we both knew he had to break up because our colleges are so far apart and we don't have money for flights. \n\nWe've texted once then, but I've been trying to avoid talking to him because I want to get over it. Apparently he was home this weekend and he asked my best friend to hang out since she's going to community college and living at home. He's kind of friends with her but they never hang out alone or anything. They don't really get along; if they're talking for more than a few hours, they start bickering.\n\nAfterwards I asked her what happened and she said that he said he misses me but he's over it. But how can you be over it if you still miss the person? I would understand if he said \"I don't miss her and I'm over it\" or \"I miss her and I'm not over it\" but not both. Also, do you think he asked her to hang out because he wanted to ask about me?", "summary": "My ex asked to hang out with my best friend, who he never hangs out with unless it's in a group. Later she told me that he said he misses me but he's over it. How is that possible?"}
{"id": "t3_1vnuc5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] just found out that my girlfriend [18F] is self-harming again, and I don't know how to proceed", "post": "My girlfriend, who I've been with for around a year and a half, has a history of self-harm (and so do I, but further in the past than hers). She stopped cutting herself about the time we started dating, saying that I was the main reason she felt happier. As far as I was aware, she never had any thoughts of relapsing, until yesterday when she revealed she has been burning herself with oil for a few weeks. This shocked and upset me; I can't help but feel like I'm 'not good enough' anymore...\n\nShe refuses to see a doctor or counsellor, or to seek any help other than the solace of physical pain. She won't tell me what has caused her to start harming again, and doesn't seem to understand how much it hurts me that she needs to hurt herself.\n\nWhat should I do? Am I selfish for worrying about our relationship almost as much as her physical and mental health?", "summary": "Girlfriend with a history of self-harm recently started burning herself with oil. I can't help but feel inadequate, as she claims she originally stopped harming thanks to me."}
{"id": "t3_ldy42", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How to go from just casually going out to something more?", "post": "We're both 19 and sophomores in college, and have been friends for a while. A few weeks ago she asked if I wanted to see where things go or just stay friends, and obviously I chose the first. That weekend we went and grabbed dinner, and this Friday we went to a party one of her friends was having. Things were a bit awkward at first, but towards the end we wind up kissing for a while, I walk her back to her building, give her a good-night kiss, and head back home feeling pretty pleased with myself.\n     So here's the kicker, as my name implies I was awkward as hell most of my life, and I've never been in a relationship. What I just described is literally the furthest I've been with a girl, so I don't have any f-ing clue what I'm doing. I was already good friends with this girl so I do really like her, and I'm pretty sure she likes me to some extent, so what do I do now?", "summary": "I've never been in a relationship before despite being 19. Gone out w/ this girl a couple times and it's going good. WTF do I do now?"}
{"id": "t3_1zrn5k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18m] wear very baggy clothes that give the illusion that I'm not overweight. Too insecure to have sex with my [18F] girlfriend.", "post": "I'm a pretty overweight guy but I seem to carry all my weight in the middle. My arms and face are pretty thin and I usually wear hoodies so everyone thinks I'm pretty damn skinny. This has lead to immense problems in my romantic life. I don't feel comfortable taking my shirt off in front of girls because of how I look. My body basically just looks awkward as fuck. My girlfriend on the other hand is extremely healthy and in shape and I'm afraid if she saw me she would.. I don't know, reject me. How do I approach this subject with her?", "summary": "Too insecure about my body to take off my clothes in front of my stunning girlfriend, how do I approach this with her?"}
{"id": "t3_507y14", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by destroying my crushes face while trying to impress her", "post": "TIFU, actually this isn't from today but rather 2 years ago. Back then I was 16 years old. I do have to mention that I have never been the most athletic guy (except for basketball, I am surprisingly good at it), I am quite short and at the time I wore very very nerdy glasses. \n\nThere was this super super hot girl I had a crush on, I am talking a 12/10 girl and after fighting my shyness I managed to talk to her and befriend her in my PE class. We didn't really do anything in the class except play with some cards. Anyways I still hadn't managed to get her phone number but I didn't have the guts to ask for it. So this one time coaches allow one side of the court for basketball and the other for volleyball. And of course I tried to show off playing basketball in front of her. I constantly looked at her and smiled and she smiled back as she watched me, apparently it was working. I do have to say that I moved to the United States from Mexico and I played a little soccer, I am not good but I can get some respect. Anyways one of the volleyball people get their ball right where I am at and super smart me decides to show off some of my soccer skills. I prepare myself and kick the ball extremely hard because they volleyball courts were a little far. I believe that is the time I have kicked a ball the hardest in my entire life. And all of a sudden I can see the ball head towards my crush, I watched it as if it was in slo mo. I couldn't do anything about it. And baaam!! Headshot, I hit her right in the face and knocked her unconscious. I run towards her just as other people did. Her nose was bleeding and she was slowly gaining consciousness. I apologized with all my might, but it was all for nothing. She left school that day and came back the next day. She didn't talk to me ever again. I was so close to getting her number and I fucked it up by trying to impress her.", "summary": "Had crush on gorgeous girl, had a chance of getting her number and tried to impress her with my soccer skills, ended up knocking her unconscious and ruining all my chances of getting her number."}
{"id": "t3_lpenf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I a jerk if I refuse to care for my roommate's cat while she's gone for three weeks?", "post": "I live in an apartment with four girls. Our university doesn't have class in January, and all three of the others will leave for the month. One of those girls has a cat.\n\nI never wanted a cat. I told them I didn't, but the roommate wouldn't live with us without her cat (she has had it for years, she didn't get it for the apartment) so I agreed. But upon her moving in I said I wanted no part of paying for the cat's expenses or caring for it. It even cost me $800 in laptop repairs a couple weeks ago when it knocked water on my computer. I'm still nice to it, I even pet it occasionally, but cats aren't my thing.\n\nSo I have zero desire to care for this cat. It if was just feeding it dry food I might consider it, but it's litter box duty too. My roommate asked me by saying, \"Will you take care of Tiger in January? I'll pay you, but less than I'll pay someone else to come do it.\"\n\nIf I say no, she'll have to hire a service to come take care of it, which makes me feel a little bad but...it's not my cat. Am I jerk if I say no?", "summary": "Am I a jerk if I refuse to feed and scoop poop for my roommate's cat while she's gone for three weeks?"}
{"id": "t3_3ezkrj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] Fianc\u00e9 [19M] and I just got engaged, his moms close friend had less than kind words to say about me.", "post": "My fianc\u00e9 and I just got engaged two days ago, we expected a bit of backlash considering our age (turning 20 this year). His moms close friend was talking to her at work this morning and she basically said that I am marrying \"up\", implying that he would have to financially take care of us and our future family, and that the financial burden would be on him. She also said that because of me and the fact that we're engaged he won't go to a different country (Canada to US) for his 4 month internship this upcoming January, despite the fact that we have discussed it already and I'm okay with it. Another thing she said was that he is \"saving\" me, didn't get an explanation for what she meant by that. \n\nI expected her to have a problem with our age, because she is in her late thirties and hasn't had much luck with men. But I didn't expect her to say something about me that was so personal. His mom said that she has never mentioned anything about my family and money to her before (we aren't the most wealthy, and if you look at it from a money stand point I am technically marrying into a family with more money than my own, but that has nothing to do with us getting married or our relationship). This isn't even the first time she has said something out of line to his mom. (talking crap about his dad, sending photos to his dad of her in a bikini, etc) \n\nAfter his mom told us this, i was very upset and we both decided that we don't want her there, which I think is now going to make her have even worse things to say about me and our relationship. \n\nHave any of you had people say things like this, what did/would you do?", "summary": "My [19F] fianc\u00e9s [19M] mom's friend told her that I was marrying up, that he was saving me, and that he would have to financially support me because my family isn't wealthy."}
{"id": "t3_3z23ur", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26M] with [18F] potential GF for 3 mo. I know it's legal, but is it creepy/wrong?", "post": "EDIT: Accidentally broke a rule.\n\nSo I met this girl on the train in my city, wound up chatting, leading to dating, and she has expressed interest in proceeding into the \"real\" long-term relationship stage. \n\nI'm pretty on-board with the idea, except the age difference is kinda messing with my head. I knew from the beginning that she was younger than me, but I didn't realize *how much* younger at first.\n\nHer attitude is that the law says she's an adult and she is allowed to be with who she wants, and she's right, but there's a voice in my head that is reminding me that she has been an adult for less time than has passed since I las needed to update my vehicle registration.\n\nI mean, I've been out of my parents' house for eight years. I've had enough time to serve a stint in the military, move around the world, and start my own small business. It's not bragging to say I have loads more world experience than she does. It is just a statement of fact.\n\nJust for the record, I'm not a Jerk. I am not and will not hold that experience over her head. I do and always will respect her. I am not trying to exploit her youth. And she is much more mature than her age would suggest.\n\nShe holds that she is perfectly happy with me and doesn't see the age as a problem. She doesn't feel exploited. \n\nAm I wrong here, or is this an okay relationship? I really need some outside perspective, because I do really want to be with this girl for the foreseeable future.", "summary": "26 year old dating an 18 year old. Both perfectly happy with the relationship, but can't decide if the age difference is creepy or wrong."}
{"id": "t3_15yuu6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Dating (19f) someone new (22m) right after a serious breakup -- how to increase chances of success?", "post": "I met my current partner in September, in one of my college classes, and quickly started having feelings for him. At the time, I was in a nosediving 3-year-old LDR that I had been considering breaking off for about 6 months. \n\nIn October, I broke off my LDR messily; a couple of weeks later, I started seeing my current partner romantically.\n\nI know it's widely considered a bad idea to date someone so soon after ending a long relationship like this (and for lots of good reasons, I know). But even though I am still getting over my last relationship, I'm developing some serious independent feelings for my new partner. And our relationship seems to be a lot more healthy than my previous one, which I am starting to realize was more co-dependent than was good for me.\n\nWe're taking things slowly, in an attempt to prevent myself from using my new guy to fill the holes my last boyfriend left (which I realize now should be filled by myself). My new partner's been very understanding about my residual hurt and sadness from my last relationship. But I could use some advice on how to make things work, and how to make sure this new relationship doesn't take an unhealthy turn.", "summary": "Against current wisdom, I entered a relationship soon after breaking off a serious one. Advice on how to keep it functional and healthy would be great."}
{"id": "t3_22jqej", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my fiance [19 F] of 5 years is becoming controlling", "post": "More and more recently, I have been noticing my fiance being more controlling and setting rules which I find to be way too restrictive.\n\nI have in the past confronted her about the rules that she sets up, and she refuses to compromise/strong-arms my desire to change these rules or even come to a happy medium. \n\nThis has become an issue starting around the time she and I started smoking weed together recreationally, and I therein began smoking more with friends and by myself as well.\n\nShe is concerned and despite my attempts to sooth her concerns, she refuses to budge and has constricted the rules she initially enforced. As well as is rather passive-aggressive when I do smoke more than two days in a row.", "summary": "My fiance has been increasingly controlling and refuses to listen to reason. What do you, my fine redditing friends, think I should do?"}
{"id": "t3_33axx9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] 9 months, doesn't trust my being on birth control.", "post": "I think it is normal to ditch condoms in long term monogamous relationships. I have been on the birth control pill for 3 years, had unprotected sex many times with my previous partner and have never been pregnant. I take my birth control religiously because neither he nor I are anywhere near ready to have a child. If I were to become pregnant, I would have an abortion, and I have expressed this to my boyfriend. I do not have any STI/Ds.\n\nMy boyfriend insists on using a condom every time and laughs when I bring up not using a condom, his only explanation being that using condoms is \"just something he likes to do\". I don't like condoms because it feels much less intimate, the feeling of skin is very different from rubber, and because condoms dry me out and sex becomes difficult/painful. The way he reacts whenever I bring up not using condoms makes me feel like he doesn't trust me, and he has said things that imply that he thinks most women are looking to get knocked up by their long term partners. I find this to be a very insulting opinion to have about women in general, and about me in particular because he should know me well enough at this point to know that I have a lot of things I want to do with my life before I am ready to have children come into the picture. \n\nI have expressed all of this to him and gotten very little from him in the way of useful responses. I can't help feeling insulted and annoyed by his opinions and reactions on this topic. In general we communicate very well and our relationship has been very happy and easy. This is a fairly minor point in our relationship, but it bothers me enough that I'd like to hear if anyone has advice as to how I can get over it myself or help him realize that I'm not trying to get pregnant.", "summary": "Boyfriend refuses to go condomless because he thinks I, like all women in relationships, am trying to trick him into impregnating me."}
{"id": "t3_3dvaom", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22M] am talking to a girl [22F] long distance. Need advice on if I should move forward with this.", "post": "Hi, this girl and I, let's call her Jen, know each other from mutual friends. She's coming up on her last year of undergrad, and I recently started my first year of graduate school. We go to different schools in the same state, but the schools are roughly on opposite ends of the state. \n\nWe talk pretty much every night, and we have a lot of things in common. There really isn't much else to say, as this is pretty straightforward, but I was wondering if other people have been in my position and have any ideas on whether or not I should move forward and act on this situation?", "summary": "Met girl through mutual friends. We are \"talking long-distance\" and I was wondering if I should call it quits or continue on to see where this goes."}
{"id": "t3_302tf9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[relationship] Gf[29] wants to do ecstasy for first time at must festival with guy friend without me[32]", "post": "Small bit of background seeing girl for close to 18 months. We both have trust issues due to messy breakups with partners who cheated on us but we are getting there. Everything has been great despite my gf still liking to keep her life and our relationship a little separate. She has a pretty large group of guy friends who I've met only once. \n\nSo long story short I'm pretty anti drugs. Never a fan and really dislike people on coke or pills. Really not my scene. Gf has told me she is going to a number of music festivals this summer and hasn't invited me. I probably wouldn't have gone but I wasn't given a choice. \n\nAt breakfast this morning she told me her and her guy friend had decided over a night out that they were going to do ecstasy at a music festival next month and then she got beyond giddy daydreaming about it. It will be both of their first times but will be with friends who have done it. This is really out of character for her as up to now she has had zero interest or so I thought. \n\nI was stunned and didn't raise the point for half an hour as I didn't know what to say. Her reaction was it's my body my choice. She said she had tried at a music festival last summer and failed to find any but would be doing it this time. \n\nIve had friends/gfs who have taken E and all they want to do is dance and then hug/kiss/screw. This along with being told we are doing E, it's not really your scene so you are not invited. \n\nIm rattled by this. Dont know this guy, don't know these friends. Should I be ok with this situation? I'm just as frustrated with the drugs as I am with the comment which went with it. Any advice is hugely appreciated.", "summary": "gf wasn't to try E for first time with guy I don't know at music festival I'm not invited to."}
{"id": "t3_36eie2", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by ruining my chances of making a good first impression on my girlfriends parents", "post": "My fuck up happened not more than 30 minutes ago, English is not my first language and unless I choose my words carefully, I usually end up saying the most fucked up things without thinking.\n\nToday was the first day I was going to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time and we planned on going to dinner afterwards.\n\nSo when my secretly engaged girlfriend's mother walked in our front door I was so eager to make a good first impression I hurriedly extended my hand in greeting and ended up saying \"Nice to meet you sir!\"\n\nWhat makes the whole thing worse is that my fianc\u00e9 had already told me her mother was self-conscious about her looks which resembled more of a man in his fifties rather than the opposite.\n\nI have tried to explain the language barrier thing as much as I can but no one believes me, my girlfriend is mad at me because she thinks I called her mom \"sir\" as some sort of distasteful attempt of a joke. Her parents didn't say much after that but claimed they were to tired to have dinner and cancelled.", "summary": "I referred to my manish looking Future Mother in law \"sir\" and everyone thinks I did it on purpose."}
{"id": "t3_1zgjsx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Parents want to give my (F18) room to my little sister when I go away to college, I'd have no room.", "post": "So the problem I'm having here is that I'll be going off to college this fall. My two siblings, parents, and I live in a very small, three bedroom ranch with not much of a living room. Currently my brother and sister share a room, and I have one to myself. My situation is that my sister wants my room, step dad told her she could have it, and I'll have no space of my own when I return for 4 months out of the year. I am a very private person and tend to stay tucked away into my room, as the house is small. How do I explain to my parents that I don't want to be displaced and that I feel like I need my privacy? I don't want to share a room with my sister, as we have a 10 year age gap, but they also don't want my siblings to share a room as brother and sister, although they have a one year age gap. My sister is messy and always likes friends over, and I'm quite the opposite and like having my own space to stay in and quietly retreat to. My room is kind of my own quiet happy space, and I hate when people touch my things or are in my space, which I know my sister would invade on all the time. I'm not financially in the position to try to get a space of my own, and my parents seldom give me money for things. How do my parents and I try to work this situation out?", "summary": "going away to college, parents want to give my room to little sister, not sure where I'd be staying 4 months out of the year."}
{"id": "t3_2dc9cj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Trying to breakup with boyfriend. He has become delusional and erratic", "post": "I am trying to break up with my boyfriend of 1 year after discovering he has been dating someone else the entire time. I found out the truth about 5 days ago and ended it. He initially reacted with denial and then anger. Now he is apologetic and wants us to continue as before. \n\nI have blocked his calls and text messages. He sent me letters in the mail. He emailed me 30-40 times in 24 hours and seemed so down that I relented replied, saying I would \"consider talking to him\" ie over the phone. Then he immediately started planning to meet. Now he is talking about buying an engagement ring, quitting his job and moving with me to another country, etc. He has taken to calling me from different numbers and I think he is hiding his caller ID. I am looking for a job at the moment so really would like to answer any calls from unknown numbers but am afraid to.\n\nI have since only sent him terse emails saying explicitly that it is over. I did send him one longer, rant-y email in which I listed the various ways in which he has lied to me to convey the magnitude of his crime. \n\nI am worried that I am dealing with an obsessive person here who is becoming unhinged. I want to end this ASAP and move on with my life. I am somewhat afraid of him physically because he lives nearby, although to be fair he has never raised a hand at me before. We also work in the same field and he is significantly more senior than I. \n\nI don't understand why he is clinging so desperately to this relationship when he treated it with such utter disrespect when he had it. In any event, while I am somewhat curious to understand the perverse inner workings of his sick mind, I primarily just want him to lose interest in me and GO AWAY. He was quite controlling during the relationship and now I don't want him to morph into a psycho stalker. I don't want to provoke him. If it came down to it, do I have any legal rights to get the police to stop him from emailing/calling me so often (in New York)?", "summary": "Boyfriend who cheated on me won't let go. How do I discourage him from contacting me and get him to move on?"}
{"id": "t3_198egs", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Seeking advice for how to politely refuse a [30+m] who asked me[20f] to have dinner with him?", "post": "I'm a student in a course attended by both grad students and undergrads. A much older member of a short-term research group I'm a part of asked me out over email.\n\nIDK why he feels that I might be interested in him or why he thinks it's an appropriate thing to do. A few weeks ago, I disclosed my age to the group and he remarked, \"you are very young\".  In this light especially, I'm skeeved and bemused that he'd approach me for a date, given that he knows absolutely nothing about me, and that I have not shown the slightest hint of interest.\n\nI didn't reply immediately-- kind of shellshocked-- and he decided to send more emails with emoticons and the like, asking if he's freaked me out. \n\nI want to refuse in a kind but direct way that is professional and unambiguous. I considered: *thank you for the invite, but I'm not interested in seeing anyone at the moment.*\n\nI've heard before that this kind of response is not clear cut, and not a good way to communicate in general. Please help me. Any suggestions would be appreciated.\n\nTo be completely honest, the true reason behind the refusal is less not wanting to date, than being repulsed by what I think is an inappropriate and unwelcome request. I don't want to give him the wrong idea, like if he waits around, I'll change my mind.", "summary": "Please help me to refuse a older guy (colleague/classmate) in a respectful/professional, but unambiguous way."}
{"id": "t3_4755o5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27/F] called my girlfriend[29/F] useless (as a joke) and she doesn't believe that I was kidding. Please help", "post": "I'm an incredibly sarcastic person. My girlfriend is too. Usually we're on the same level when it comes to each other's humor. Tonight I fucked up big time. \n\nMy girlfriend has been going through some tough times (fights with her boss [her boss thinks she's incompetent at her job when she's clearly not]), her sister is sick) and we were eating dinner tonight. She asked a dumb question and I answered it sarcastically. She was trying to defend it (as a joke) and I answered her back even more sarcastically. She said something how her answer is right and I said \"you're useless\" in a deadpan voice but I was completely joking. \n\nI know I sound like a terrible person, but we sometimes can be very sarcastic to each other but it's not in a malicious way. Tonight, I should have eased up. It's my fault. I sensed she was feeling high-strung from work and I just didn't care enough to be more thoughtful. I know I'm wrong. \n\nMy girlfriend took my words to heart and broke down crying and told me I make her feel like shit. I had no idea. I've apologized profusely but she says it's not a big deal. Which is her codeword for \"I'm just going to pretend it never happened and we're not going to talk about this\". I'm trying to give her space but I feel so so bad for what I said and for how I made her feel. I told her I didn't mean it, that I was joking, but she said if I didn't mean it, I wouldn't have said it, even as a joke. I love this girl to pieces. We've been dating for almost 2 years, and living together for more than half a year.\n\nReddit I'm kind of lost. How do I fix this?", "summary": "My girlfriend and I are sarcastic people but I went too far tonight and called her useless. She doesn't believe I was kidding but refuses to talk about it."}
{"id": "t3_16njew", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Children of narcissistic parents, what effect has their behavior had on your life and how have your learned to cope?", "post": "My dad is a narcissist and a high school teacher, throughout my adolescence he has compared my achievements to his students. At home he frequently made my younger brother and myself stand in front of him and tell him that I'm not better than him. \n\nObjectively I know I am a high achieving college student (I have 2 jobs, I'm on scholarship to an out of state university, do club sports, and have a job lined up after college) I am confident but at the same time can only value things comparatively (I'm good, but there's always someone better).  I hadn't talked to my dad since I left for college 3 years ago but he sends me money and gifts all the time, which I frequently send home. He cheated on my mom 3x, she just recently left him. When I went home this past Christmas we had to spend time with him or he wouldn't sign the divorce papers, he resumed treatment of myself and my brother like before. \n\nI have never been in a relationship, if I like someone there is always someone better for them than me. I've seen a therapist and he said I need to reconnect with my dad. I refused. Any steps to moving on?", "summary": "My dad is a narcissist, from the outside I look like a high achieving college student but I have severe doubt and have never been in a relationship because of the \"I'm not good enough\"."}
{"id": "t3_4hag5g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [20 F] get over hurting my ex boyfriend [22M] and make amends with him?", "post": "My ex and I dated for about a year with a lot of complications and drama at the beginning. I am always very upfront with my thoughts on my relationship so he fully knew it made me insecure even though I decided to stay with him.\n\n We were both emotionally damaged; him by a past relationship and me by my childhood, but he was always present and caring. I was more of the problem because of my anxiety and depression, something that was hard for him to fathom. \n\nThroughout our relationship he would tell me he wanted to stay friends if we didn't stay together, and he wasn't sure we would. It took him months of dating to call me his girlfriend, even though he spent all his time with me, and I told him I loved him a few months before we broke up and he did not return it.\n\n It got to a point where we were arguing a lot and I stopped having the desire to spend time with him. I broke up with him kind of suddenly I guess, so I believe that mixed with the guilt of his unfaithfulness at the start of our relationship is what makes him have such hard feelings.His anger towards me also fuels some very confusing guilt on my end. \n\nHow can I make him forgive me? If I had known the breakup was going to be this bad I would have rethought it or at least how I went about it. I valued him very highly as a friend and I am more upset having him out of my life than I was in the relationship. We are both dating new people now but we both also have a lot of unresolved feelings. \n\nWe dated for a year and have been broken up for a year now and would talk from time to time, up until a few weeks ago when he told me he didn't want to anymore because of how much I hurt him and how I'll never understand how he feels.", "summary": "How do I make my ex and I get over our leftover feelings from our relationship? His being anger and sadness toward losing me as a girlfriend and mine being guilt and sadness toward losing him as a friend"}
{"id": "t3_29b4sr", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by keeping potatoes too long", "post": "So, this all started a few months back when I first moved into my new place. I was low on groceries from moving and bought a ton of food to last me a couple of weeks. I figured I might as well by some potatoes because they're easy to make even though I rarely ate them growing up. After a few weeks, I was settled in but had yet to eat the potatoes that were sitting on the bottom of the shelf I put all my food on. They had started budding a bit and I decided that I should let them bud a bit more since I had never seen them grow more than the few little spots/eyes. So, after another month, they had budded a lot more to a point where they were piercing through the packaging. I thought this looked pretty cool and once again decided to keep them there to see how far they could go before I got bored of them, or when they started taking up too much space. Now, after a couple more months, I stopped checking on them and pretty much forgot they were even there. This was only until recently when I was throwing out any old food left on my shelves... Before this, there were a lot of bugs (I'm told fruit flies) in my house, but I guessed they were coming through my window from the creek nearby... However, when I was throwing out the old food, I noticed the potatoes had grown massively, and I could see they were falling apart when I picked them up. That's when I realized where the insects were coming from. Inside the packaging were dozens and dozens of larvae eating the potatoes. I immediately dropped the package in disgust and had chills running through my body. I picked it up after a few seconds of shouting \"HOLY SHIT\" over and over, and threw it away in the dumpster outside immediately... Now I'm just hoping the flies were only coming from the potatoes and not anything else I have neglected throwing away...", "summary": "Fruit Flies! infiltrated house, caused by 6 month old sack of potatoes I neglected to throw away because I thought they looked cool when budded. "}
{"id": "t3_15e4in", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Finally ended college studies, what should I do now? Look for work or keep studying?", "post": "Hi all, first time posting here... I recently ended studying but honestly I feel like I don't know much, even if I have the best grade in the generation of the engineering school where I studied.\n\nI studied Software Engineering, and I have an interest in Artificial Intelligence. I could, with my current knowledge, look for work to do stuff like development of applications like management, mobile apps, accounting, etc. A bunch of boring stuff...\n\nOr I could keep studying to aim for a bigger goal, I have a strong interest in AI, NASA, AEM, but I feel not smart enough to search for that. I don't know anybody in the field, and I'm not from the US.\n\nI'm 25 years old, living with my fiance. If I keep studying, I can try to get a scholarship but it's not guaranteed to get one, and the school I want to go is in another state of my country, so I'll have heavy expences if I go that way, and my fiance just have highschool finished, so he won't get a very good job.\n\nMy fear is that if I get a job right now, I'll be there more time than I want (settlement, conform), and I'll be condemned to a cubicule for the rest of my life, doing boring stuff (it's really not easy to get a good job here).\n\nAnd if I study, maybe I won't be able to pay the whole thing, and at the end maybe studying AI won't help me at all, and I won't be able to get a job with that, at least not in this country.\n\nSo here I am, not deciding on what to do. I have until march to decide to actually keep studying. What would you do? There's points in favor of each thing, and I'm confused. :) Thank you in advance.", "summary": "Keep studying to aim for bigger goals (specialization in a field)? or get a job right now and try to make my way up from there?"}
{"id": "t3_3lblhi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [35F] just found out my daughters [14F] father is planning to take her to a gun range after school. I am beside myself with rage and want to intercept her before he can get to her. This could cause legal issues. What do I do?", "post": "Quick back ground, I was only with my daughter's father for a very short time. He was in the military and got moved away when she was about 2. I thought he was  decent guy and was involved as much as he could be and always paid support, gave gifts and saw her whenever he could. \n\nHe recently moved back into our city with the military and my daughter has been so excited. I am not happy with all the changes because I don't think he feeds her well, he wants her to play sports (both my girls are very arts and computer orientated). So far she has taken to all of this stuff because he's very handsome, charismatic and was a pro football player for two years. She is over the moon in love with him, which I don't want to stop even if I have issues with it. \n\nHe just texted me that he was going to take her to a fucking gun range after school. I said absolutely not. It's not safe and I do not believe in guns in any way shape or form and they should be banned and every gun owner should be arrested and locked away for life (yes I feel that strong). He said that he does have custodial rights and that as long as its legal, he can do what he wants. I said absolutely not. He said we could talk about it in person when they got to my house. \n\nI want to stave this off and go grab my daughter out of school right now and get a restraining order against him. This is sickening. I'm a momma bear and no one fucks with my kids like this. \n\nWe have an agreement (not legal, but written and signed) that he gets to pick her up from school on the days I'm in class. But from what I understand it could be used me in court and I guess technically what he is doing is not illegal (but it is grossly immoral in my opinion) \n\nCan anyone offer advice?", "summary": "Daughter's father wants to take her to a gun range. I want to never see him again. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1s4igw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I [M15] comfort her[F15] while I'm waiting for her?", "post": "I met a girl last year, and started to get to know her better in school. We ended up becoming really good friends and I eventually got the courage to ask her out. She didn't say no, but she did say that she was emotionally unavailable and kind of unstable to be in a relationship. So we just became friends. \n\nA few days ago, we talked about it some more. I wanted to make sure that she was interested in a more serious relationship still (mainly because I was terrified that I had been friend-zoned). I was not, and she said that she was interested and could still see us together, but that her life was still to hectic to include something like that. I was relieved, as she also said that she would even tell me when she was ready to progress. I would never pressure her into something like this.\n\nSo how should I simply comfort her during this time? She's getting over some depression issues, but I can see how bright and optimistic she is, and I want to be there for her. What tips can you give me?", "summary": "I'm ready to progress the relationship, she wants to but isn't ready, how do I help her/comfort her through these tough times?"}
{"id": "t3_220aln", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Update] Best friend[24] owes me[24] money from three years ago. Can we resolve this?", "post": "Original: \n\nSo to sort of update this there really isn't an update. She told me the check would be here Tuesday. Check didn't show up I told her it wasn't here with no answer from here. \n\nTherefore I'm finished. I want to tell her what a manipulative lying bitch she has been for the past several years and really let go of all my anger and she most certainly deserves it(given the original situation and all of the stuff she has put me through since high school) but there is some little part of me that's telling me to just move on. Block her from Facebook and delete her number from my phone. However we have several interconnected friends and while I've only told my boyfriend and my cousin about the situation I don't know what will happen once they start to ask questions.\n\nAny advice on the matter would be helpful. My boyfriend is urging me to tell her exactly what for and my mother is (nicely) saying \"I told you so\" but both of them are connected to the situation so is prefer some outside advice. If any expansion is needed on anything I'd be glad to explain.", "summary": "friend is a manipulative bitch and I want to tell her so, is this a smart move or should I be the bigger woman and move on?"}
{"id": "t3_52xnyz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I (27m) right to be weirded out by my gf (26) and her friends (?m) \"relationship\".", "post": "So I met my gf off tinder. We've been officially dating for a month, seeing way other for a couple weeks before that. When we first started chatting on tinder she mentioned (on her profile) how she was looking for friends only. After meeting her I knew I wanted to be more than friends, one thing led to another and we started dating.\n\nEverything has been going awesome! But I just have one \"issue\".\n\nBefore I met my gf she met another guy off tinder. She's told me about him and when we first committed to dating each other she told me how he would only ever be a friend and nothing more. She said I don't need to worry about him and that she's all mine. Ok great. I'm not against having friends of the opposite sex, I have some friends who are female myself. \n\nMy problem is that when they do hangout (maybe once or twice every couple weeks) they seem to almost go on \"dates\".  They don't hangout in group settings (always just the two of them). Last time they hung out, my gf went over to his place to watch movies. Tonight they are going to a board game bar.\n\nMy girlfriend is honestly the nicest person I've ever met. She's never given me a reason to mistrust her but I can't help but feel uncomfortable with their friendship. I've never met this guy and she doesn't have him on FB so I have no idea what he looks like. Should I be concerned with this? I trust her but being a dude I know how guys think. \n\nAny advice?", "summary": "dating a girl who is friends with a guy. They hangout one on one in some \"date\" like scenarios."}
{"id": "t3_19j29q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] was drunk and acted insane and jealous to my[21M] bf of 3 months.", "post": "We've been dating for about a year and together officially for 3 months. We weren't together before due to long distance.\n\nI was VERY drunk (not that it is an excuse) the other night at a bar with my boyfriend and we ran into one of his old friends who is a female and also happens to be best friends with his ex. She kept bringing up his ex to me and it was bothering me that she would talk so much about her to me when they have been over for so long, and barely went out for any amount of time at all. I guess it bothered me a lot because I started questioning him about her and acted literally insane. Asking things such as are you only with me cause you couldn't be with her, did you like her more, do you wish you were with her.\nI have no idea why i acted like this as although I am kind of insecure and think about these things I have never expressed them before in any relationship I've ever been in. We ended up fighting about it and I was probably pretty crazy.\n\nHe slept over and in the morning when I woke up and realized what a crazy person I had been I apologized a lot. He said it was fine it was just the vodka and told me not to worry. He asked if I remembered telling him to go home (which I don't) and he said 'I didn't want to go home I wanted to stay and wake up next to you' so I thought that was very sweet and maybe it wasn't as much of a big deal as I thought.\n\nThe only problem is he's been very distant since. Barely texting me, took hours to respond to my text (abnormal for him unless he is asleep, which he wasnt) and now I am worried. I'm not sure what to do as I apologized a lot. I don't know if any of you could tell me maybe what he's thinking right now, or how I go about fixing this. I'm afraid he will break up with me over it.", "summary": "I was crazy to my boyfriend while drunk, which is abnormal for me, now he's being distant which is abnormal for him, can I fix it?"}
{"id": "t3_2iziec", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By telling me girlfriend she looks like a prostitute. (Currently homeless.) [SFW]", "post": "Okay so I broke up with my girlfriend a week ago. We were living together. The brake up was mutual since we both expected it. We both had our small fights but that was expected. Until yesterday where she went out with some people from her work place. After she returned her makeup was kinda ruined after hours of dancing and drinking. So I told her that she looked like a prostitute after her shift ended.\n\nShe didn't say anything and went straight to sleep. Next day she didn't even say a good morning to me. I got up, got dressed and went out with a friend. After I returned home she just bombed me with every problem in our relationship. But what sparked the fight was the \"prostitute thing\".\n\nI just said it to tease her and nothing more. I came home to find all my clothes packed and she threw me out of the house.\n\nWorst thing is that I'm new to the country and I have no friends so I guess today I'm sleeping to a hotel and start looking for a new place.\n\nWish I could take everything back... But I guess its too late.", "summary": "Told (ex)girlfriend her make up looked like a prostitute after her shift. And next day found myself homeless having no place to stay."}
{"id": "t3_1ct7s1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Already doubting [23f] relationship with [25m] after 1 month of serious dating", "post": "I'm a 23 year old female who's been single for the past 3 years.  My last relationship ended badly and I basically lost all desire for love and commitment.  Just to understand what issues I am dealing with I should explain that he had no job, didn't graduate from high school, didn't pay or offer me anything but I was young and in love so it didn't matter.  \n\nAnyway, since then I've become a bit of a lone wolf.  I'm a fiercely independent woman, almost to a fault.  I kind of feel like it may be that I'm trying to prove something but I'm not sure what that is.\n\nI met a guy about 5 months ago through some mutual friends.  We have a lot of common interests like guns, camping and generally having a good time.  We started dating seriously about a month ago and he refers to me as his girlfriend.  \n\nWithin the past two days we've realized we are different.  He's conservative with traditional values and I'm more liberal and unconventional.  It's almost a good thing because he's grounding me a little more and I'm opening up his mind to different ways of thinking.  However, I've realized that he's a bit self absorbed.  Not in a narcissistic way but he only seems to be able to relate things through himself.  I put a lot of effort into being interested in his projects but he doesn't make an effort to being interested in my projects.  I can tell that issues from my last relationship are urging me to abandon ship immediately for fear of being hurt again and I wonder if I'm almost TRYING to find reasons to leave.  \n\nBasically, we have two issues.  I had basically conviced myself that I wanted to be alone but I found a guy I genuinely care about.  He makes me happy and the thought of being with him doesn't make me nauseous.  Secondly, are we incompatible or am I trying to make us incompatible?  If I'm already sensing he's a little self absorbed should I continue this relationship?", "summary": "I'm a girl with a lonewolf mentality that found a guy that I may consider allowing join the wolf back but have my reservations. Should I let him join my wolfpack or am I better flying solo?"}
{"id": "t3_2p8135", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Struggling with university(college)", "post": "Hello all so a bit of backstory; i'm 22 years old currently working full time as a Kitchen Porter/Commi chef, i'm also in 2nd year of a Software Development course slowly letting it all fail. I've lived by myself in a flat but had to move back home because i couldn't find a job where i was at. Me and brother live and look after ourselves (our parents are only back home for a month in a year).\n\nI was studying to be an accountant but hated that, so i tried to pick something i was interested in. I enjoyed working on games, and working with people. But once i hit 2nd year i just couldn't find the time to work on stuff properly, i needed the money badly. So i'm in the midst of resitting the module i failed, watching it fail again. My coursework will be late, i'm pretty certain i can pass the exam in a month but my coursework i find just to difficult to wing it.\n\nI've fucked up i know and haven't found the time to work on my coursework, i could blame the crazy 12+hour shifts but i know other people work much longer then me and find the time to do many many things.\n\nI'm honestly scared because i'm 22, i don't know what the fuck it is i'm meant to do. I hate working in a kitchen but it pays the bills, but i think if i'm to be successful in this degree (if i get a chance to resit it in August)\nI might be able to get a resit in August but i'm just scared i'm not where i should be at 22, and i don't know who to talk to,letting everyone down.", "summary": "Fucked up again, cant find time to do things whilst working i job i hate, don't know what to do"}
{"id": "t3_3hnib4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend [25 M] of a 1 yr chats up other women to assist friend on nights out, in full view of myself [21 F] Obvious double standard as he's been dread gaming me throughout the relationship, apparent whenever I even joke about other guys.", "post": "So my boyfriend and I have been going out for a little more then a year. Our relationship is pretty good and he's a really awesome person to be around.\n\nSince our relationship commenced, a common theme on our nights out is my boyfriends newly divorced room mate not making enough effort to chat to women, despite clearly wanting to. At first I took my boyfriends desire to help his mate out, as pretty considerate. However as I'm now trying to restrict my drinking when we go out (something which my boyfriend made a point of), I'm much more aware of how my boyfriend is really just inflating his own ego through chatting to these women.\n\nThis culminated a few weeks ago when my boyfriend, while rather drunk, told me there was no point of him going out while in a relationship unless his mate was going to fuck a random chick. When I then asked what the point of a night out was for me, he replied 'to provide social validation [for previously mentioned friend]' awesome right?\n\nI trust he's been faithful throughout our relationship & will continue to be so, but it still makes me feel shitty when he spends extended periods talking to these other women,or pointing out 'cuties' for his mate to chat to, while I'm struggling with boredom because I can't drink as much as I used to. \nHe talks about leaving me whenever I even joke about other guys (guys need to give up dread game -.- I value the relationship not because I fear losing him but because he genuinely adds to my life.) \n\nOn the one night someone ever approached me my bf got annoyingly angry with me for talking to him, despite me only telling the random dude that I was in a relationship (but my bf was pretty drunk so I didn't think too much of this reaction).", "summary": "Don't know whether I can bring up my boyfriends obvious flirtation with other women, without sounding like a jealous freak."}
{"id": "t3_r6g8k", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm 22 and don't know what I'm doing when it comes to shaving.  I'm currently thinking of buying an electric razor, but, could someone who is a bit more experienced in shaving give me some advice on what to buy?", "post": "I grew up with my mom.  When I hit the age where I started growing facial hair, she bought me a razor (one like [this] and some shaving cream, and I just kind of figured out the rest.\n\nI generally shave after my hot shower (I believe it opens the pours or something).  I cover my face in gell/foam and go with the grain then against the grain.  Then if I missed any spots or the razor is dull and there is still a little bit of stubble, I'll go with the grain again, until it is gone.\n\nThat's it.  \n\nMy beard looks like [this] because I don't know how to shape or style it.  I have no hair above my lip or on my neck.  Once the beard gets a bit too long, I'll just shave it all off and start over because I don't know what the hell I'm doing.\n\nI was thinking about buying an electric razor because:\n\n1.  I'm under the impression I can do a quick once-over on my face every day, keeping myself relatively clean shaven, or, if I can pull it off, with just a thin layer of stubble (which I hear the ladies like).\n\n2.  It would be cheaper than buying razor heads.\n\n3.  They don't give razor burn, which, I get on my neck frequently if I shave more than once every four days (which sucks because I get a faint neck beard that I feel looks unattractive).\n\nSo yeah... Any suggestions?  Good electric razor suggestions?  I've got about $50 to spend on one, unless a more expensive razor will make a *huge* difference, and is well worth the investment.", "summary": "I don't know what the hell I'm doing when it comes to shaving.  How convenient does an electric razor make the process?"}
{"id": "t3_3b5bya", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Texts I [17F] will never send to ???? [24M].", "post": "-I hate the way you blow smoke out of the side of your mouth.\n\n-I hate the inflections in your voice when you flirt with me.\n\n-I hate how your hand feels on my shoulder blades when you unnecessarily stroke my back.\n\n-I hate the way you look at me with that stupid smirk and your stupid eyebrows.\n\n-I hate taking 15 minutes to compose a witty, grammatically correct, meticulously worded reply to your texts. Then waiting an hour or two to send it so I don't look keen.\n\n-I hate looking to my right and seeing your face on the pillow next to me when we're watching TV in your bed.\n\n-I really, really, really, really hate your six pack.\n\n-Ditto arms. Hideous. Get them out of my sight.\n\n-I hate the fact that I didn't pretend I was drunker on that last night, and that I didn't scoot closer to you under the covers and rest my head in the space between your neck and your shoulder.\n\n-I hate the fact that you're not a person I could ever actually date, not least because you're a massive slag who would break my heart.\n\n-I therefore hate the fact that you want to fuck me. And I hate that you know I know. And I hate that you know I want it.\n\n-Because I hate the fact that I'm way more emotionally attached to you, dependent on you even, than you ever could be to me.\n\n-I hate the fact that I think of you when I come.\n\n-I hate the fact that I'm not going to talk to you for the next month, because facebooking or emailing you would be an intrusion on my part. And you're not going to facebook or email me, because you don't need to. Or want to, I guess.\n\n-I hate the fact that I miss your dumb ass so much that I'm writing this to make myself feel better, while you haven't thought of me at all since I went away. Except maybe once or twice. In passing. Perhaps?\n\n-I hate how happy that possibility makes me.", "summary": "WHY DO I KEEP ACCIDENTALLY STARTING TO CARE ABOUT PEOPLE WHO DON'T CARE ABOUT ME \u0449(\u0ca0\u76ca\u0ca0\u0449)"}
{"id": "t3_3c5m7l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] and my girlfriend [21 F] almost seem to be ending after 7 years and I'm at a loss of what to do", "post": "It has been just about 7 years since we have been dating (since high school) and I love her to death.  We have always had a kind of long distance thing going on because we went to different colleges but we were able to see each other during the summer.  Just a few days ago,  though,  she tells me that she isn't sure if I make her happy and needs time to think. This has really torn me apart because I have tried to change as much as I could for her (like cleaning more and playing less video games), but it really feels like it was for nothing.  I have tried to give her space to think, but I always cave in and try to convince her to stay with me.  She says she wants to the end of the month to think, but I don't know if I can reasonably go that long without talking to her again.  I'm at a real loss of what to do because I don't want to lose her,  but I want to make her happy as well.  What should I do?", "summary": "My girlfriend of 7 years wants time to think about our relationship, but it's really hard for me to not contact her."}
{"id": "t3_34h4md", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [34 M] with my _EX__ [24 F] 1 year, hooked up a few times but she won't get back together. How to change her mind?", "post": "So my ex GF has met me a few times over the past few weeks and we have spent a few nights in bed together.  We broke up a few months ago. (I  started the idea, she officially ended it.) \n\nAfter we broke up she got with her co-worker and realized after a month or so it was a mistake.  She said she cares a lot for me but I can see she doesn't have the same happiness as when we were together.  \n\nShe says she's confused right now and not sure about jumping back into relationship.  I am usually the one who wants to meet up and we talk on phone and text regularly.  But its hard to get her to meet with me.  \n\nI realize we really click and she is great to be around and we had so much fun together.  I broke up because I thought grass greener.  (Stupid choice).  \n\nI have given her flowers and took her on some great dates how to get back her attention?  Before when we were together she wanted to be with me everyday now seems like roles are reversed?  What to do?", "summary": "EX GF  (we hooking up occasionally )loved to hang out with me before and now I want to and she doesn't. How to change her mind?"}
{"id": "t3_45r14h", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Is my sister pregnant?", "post": "So I have two sisters, one my age, and an older sister. Well lately I've been sleeping with my older sister and my other has been getting pissed at us. I get that it's fucked up but I got to fuck someone right? \n\nWell two weeks ago my older sister was staying over a friends so I was bored. I then went to give my sister her panties that somehow got in my laundry and when I opened her door she was naked on her bed sleep with the tv on... I don't know what the hell she was doing but her ass was just so plump... I couldn't even focus... I peaked out to see if my parents was sleep then slowly closed her door. That's when I started feeling it an oh my god... I thought she was flat at first because of our older sister but I guess she made up in ass. Anyway I looked over and saw her pussy and almost died... It was so juicy, like she felt me touching her. She wasn't wet, but it was just... Wow. Her breast were on the small side, but still it was kinda cute. After a few more poking around... I... Couldn't help myself... I was just going to see how she felt. So I put my dick in. After a few pumps I couldn't stop, she was so fucking tight, way better than my older sister. Eventually she even started moaning a little and I just couldn't even think any more before I knew it I was cumming. I pulled out as fast as I could, but some was still in her and on her bed. All of sudden she started moving over and like she was agitated so I just hurried out. \n\nNow she's been throwing up lately and not eating so I don't know what the fuck happened... She hasn't metioned anything. My older sister seems to not want to sleep with me lately, not that I asked but... Is my sister pregnant? She's always moody so that wouldn't be a clue...", "summary": "I accidentally cummed a little in my sister when pulling out, and she's been sick lately, and showing signs of pregnancy. Help?"}
{"id": "t3_wsx78", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "not exactly sure what to do...", "post": "I'm a 23(m) in a weird relationship with a girl I work with (21).  Just kinda feels like a rushed relationship.  I'm a little on the meaty side, and she's petite.  Now, I have nothing against smaller girls at all, but honestly, I feel like she's too small for me.  We tried having some 'alone time' and it felt like I was learning how to tie my shoes again basically.  Everything just wasn't the right proportion for me, and honestly, I didn't know how to handle her...  am I weird for feeling lost?  We haven't really been together that long (**about 3-5 weeks**), and I'm kinda feeling like maybe backing out of the relationship...  not just because of the physical stuff, but there's been some issues with her family that makes having a relationship a little hard to maintain on a normal level...  any advice?", "summary": "She's small, I'm big and feel lost intimately.  Not sure if I should continue the relationship because of that and family issues on her side."}
{"id": "t3_t0y34", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have you ever been frightened by a fellow co-worker's attitude/disposition?", "post": "There's an employee who works for us, I'll call him Dave.\n\nDave is slim build, but sports a large upper body, which is evidence that he works out a lot. he has an EXPLOSIVE attitude problem, and the fact that most of the time he walks around eerily silent gives me a bad feeling about him.\n\n I am a supervisor and was promoted before him. understandably this can be frustrating for someone with less experience to gain a higher position, but the thing is, Dave NEVER does anything to better himself or his standing within the company. He constantly does the bare minimum and will not do anything outside of his position for anyone. He also refuses to take shifts he's not scheduled for unless it's usher (he refuses to work concession or box, which is important for a someone in a supervisor position to do.) He expects that just because he's been there for a long period of time, he's going to get the position. But I digress. \n\nDave tends to \"hold things in;\" things that are bothering him or that he doesn't agree with, and then proceeds to PROJECT his anger and agression out on myself and a number of other managers. He does this by stomping around, breathing hard, and balling up his fists and speaking with severe upward inflections. There's a possible new supervisor position opening up soon because we just lost someone, and I am terrified after he doesn't get it (there's not way he's getting promoted because of the reasons stated earlier, plus his inability to deal with stress without screaming and acting aggressive) That he's going to come in and shoot up the place, or PHYSICALLY hurt someone.", "summary": "Employee has an explosive attitude problem, and I'm fearful he's going to hurt someone after he doesn't get the possible supervisor position opening up."}
{"id": "t3_28vax1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my girlfriend [17 F] 6 months, Girlfriend wants to break up if I go to another college but there's still a year left", "post": "So I'm going to college in about a year while leaving my girlfriend behind. I have two options right now which is to stay in my state and go to an okayish college or go somewhere else to a better college. She doesn't really want to do a long distance relationship and neither do I. The problem comes up in what I chose. I already know I want to go out of state to the better college but I haven't broken this news to my girlfriend yet. She believes that I'll stay in state and stay with her through college. Now I love her a lot and I care about her a lot but I know I need to value my education more right now. However when we've talked about me going to college she's made it clear that if I decide to go to the far away college she rather just have us break up now so she won't get her self more attached/in love with me. \n\nNow I've made my decision already but I'm not ready to lose her and I don't want to lose her when I still have almost a year before I leave. I know I need to tell her soon that I'm leaving and I don't want to drag this out and make this hurt her more but at the same time I know telling her will make her want to break up. My dream situation is to tell her now and get her to understand and want to stay with me for the year before I leave and have an amazing year with each other. I just don't know if that can happen. We love each other a lot both and she tells me that I'm the only guy who has ever made her this happy and stuff and we both deeply care about each other. I know we'll probably both meet a lot more people in our life and we won't end up getting married or anything unrealistic but I just want to have at least my remaining year left with her.\n\nAny Advice? Thanks!", "summary": "Going off to college but girlfriend wants to break things off now (still a year left) if I leave to go somewhere else."}
{"id": "t3_2ojuvw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "LDR Girlfriend's (23F) uber receipt shows different address than where she told me (24M) she was going.", "post": "Hi everyone,\n\nI have been with my girlfriend for seven months now and will be meeting her for the first time in one week. We've had our ups and downs, as any long distance relationship does, but we've been very good at communicating and, honestly, everything is perfect apart from the distance. I have never had any reason to suspect anything suspicious and I trust her.\n\nLast night, at midnight, she told me she was going to her university library to get some books. She texted me along the way (in the uber) and when she arrived. I told her to text me when she was leaving as I was worried because it was late and she did (1.5 hours later).\n\nNow, here are the inconsistencies. I do not want to reveal too many details due to privacy or in case someone she knows reads this. She said she would get these books and study there. When she texted me on her way back, she said she didn't study because she had to obtain files from the university computers which her professor had emailed them saying would be deleted (apparently emailed them at midnight..).\n\nThat is all fine, we say good night when she gets home and everything is great. I go on her email later to check her calendar and out of mere curiosity I open an Uber receipt that was sitting there. The time code and date both match the trip, but the address is not her university. Also, there was no uber receipt for her way back (maybe it was deleted, or it was never sent? I do not know how uber works, I never used it).\n\nI was really scared and called her in the middle of the night to ask her what was going on. She said it must be an old receipt and I felt like shit for suspecting anything. She said she could show me the books she got and even the 'new' receipt (whenever that arrives). I apologized profusely and that was it. But I am now starting to worry. Does Uber send receipts immediately? Should I suspect anything?", "summary": "I am not sure if I should be worried by the fact that an uber receipt shows a different address to where my gf said she was going. She said the uber receipt was old or wrong"}
{"id": "t3_2bi9ik", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by having rough sex with my boyfriend", "post": "So I'm hoping writing this down will make it funny instead of just annoyingly stupid. I recently got a new and awesome job. It's distributed so my office is my computer...awesome. I was showing my boyfriend, a certified software geek, around my digital office. He leaned over my shoulder and so I have his neck a kiss and started kissing up to his chin. He caught my drift pretty quickly and we went to the bed. \n\nBoth of us enjoy sex on the rough side, nothing too extreme, but this day he was a little more into it then normal. Mostly just dirty talk and a little spanking but some choking too. Of course I'm a little more vocal and have always thought I sounded like I was in pain when I'm not. Of course things went as they normally do. All in all it was awesome and both of us were having a great time. Until my blinking screen caught my eye. \n\nOur meeting software was on and evidently broadcasting. I keep a black sticker over the camera but still sound was probably perfectly audible. I screamed \"no, stop!\" and thinking he hurt me my boyfriend launched away from me like a burned cat. I ran over and checked the meeting software and it seemed like no one else was on. I turned it off and told my boyfriend. Both of us were laughing in relief at what was our near escape. Or what we thought. \n\nAbout a minute later there is a pounding on the door with a police officer  who was bound and determined to arrest my boyfriend for rape. Evidently one of my coworkers did sign on, hear what sounded like a woman in pain and a man going \"yeah, you like that? yeah you do.\" We both tried to talk to the officer who looked like he wanted to punch my boyfriend in the face. I tried to tell him it was all a misunderstanding. I let the police officer take me to the hospital while iterating over and over again that it was just sex, I was a willing and happy party in it. I had to tell a dozen nurses and doctors, receive a humiliating exam and received more pamphlets on rape then I knew existed and my boyfriend is now petrified of my computer and dead silent when we have sex.", "summary": "Had rough sex with my boyfriend while company meeting software was on lead to the police being called and my boyfriend nearly being arrested for rape."}
{"id": "t3_4g0bzk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my ___ [28 F] GF of 8 years, Should my gf make me feel special? She expects me to make her feel special.", "post": "She never compliments me or says anything to make me feel like I'm important to her. I am not bad looking, in good shape (if a little too skinny, but still work out) and I have an interest in trendy fashion. I feel like I usually put more effort into what I'm wearing and how I look than she does yet there is never a word about it.\n\nIf she gets her hair cut or wears a dress, I am supposed to say how great it looks when the other 9/10 times she wears her hair in a tight bun and wears high waist leggings to hide how out of shape she is now.\n\nI just sometimes don't know why I settle for this. I feel like there could be someone else out there that will make me feel happy and loved but I'm too afraid to give up our relationship because we have been together so long that it would be like losing one of my childhood friends or something.", "summary": "How bad is it to feel like other friends in your life treat you like you're smarter, more attractive, more interesting etc than your significant other does?"}
{"id": "t3_12pp2d", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My sister has very different political views from me, and I feel like she is brainwashing my son. How can I approach this?", "post": "I am a single mom of two sons, and my sister is much younger than me. She is a 20-year old college student with very liberal views contrasting my conservative ones and is often very vocal about her opinions. One of my sons is 11 years old and he looks up to her a lot. I feel like sometimes I'm just his old mom, and she's the one he goes to when he needs anything, like help with homework.\n\nWith the election being a really big topic recently, my sister often talks to my son about these sort of things and her opinions obviously really differ from what I want him to believe. I feel like she thinks I am raising my own children wrong. We both grew up in the same religious household, but at very different times since she is so much younger. She still goes to church with our parents, but probably just to make them happy. Her religious views are nothing like what I want to instill in my kids. For example, my sons are both in a Sunday youth group at our church. My older son (14) doesn't really mind it too much, but the younger one likes to rebel and complain about it. At one point, I asked my sister if she could explain to my son that it is important to be in this youth group and she said, \"No, I don't think I can tell him that because I don't believe it myself. All they are doing in that youth group is telling him how to think, and if that's the way you want to raise him then I'm not going to help.\" \n\nI am really stuck as to what to do. My younger son has recently come up to me and said, \"Mom, why are you voting for Mitt Romney? Auntie says that he would make a bad president and he doesn't care about people who are different from him.\" It's things that this that I don't know how to answer. My sister and I are not particularly close (she is the youngest sibling and I am the oldest - she's much closer to our other siblings). So how do I approach this? How can I talk to my sister, or to my son?", "summary": "Younger sister with liberal views does not like the values I teach my son, tells him things I don't really want him hearing. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3cn7aq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] with my may or may not be GF [17 F] one date but known for a couple months, getting some weird vibes from her", "post": "I met her about two months ago and have been texting her for the past month, I grew a pair and asked her out last week, we saw a movie a few days ago and after the movie we walked around the mall holding hands. The thing that worries me is that though she went on a date with me and held my hands, I feel she might be uninterested. The times we were together before the date and while texting I would compliment her, but she never returned the favor. Even when I asked for her birthday she never asked for mine. I don't know what to think of the situation. How should I play this out reddit?", "summary": "Girl went on date with me but has seemed maybe uninterested before and after the date. How should I play this out?"}
{"id": "t3_u94s5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I want to lose weight; bf likes me how I am. Please help! (Throwaway)", "post": "I (F21) and my Boyfriend (M23) have been going out for 2 years, and its my first serious relationship. \n\nI am a bit overweight (61kg/132lbs on a 5 ft 5in frame), and am taking measures to remedy this. It was mainly caused by myself going to university, and though I walk everywhere in the city it hasn't been enough to keep the weight off. \n\nI've started cutting out unhealthy foods, eating smaller portions and swimming 2-3 days a week. I only started about 2 weeks ago and so it hasn't really made an impact visually, but I am feeling a lot livelier after the change in diet. (If anyone can give me any advice or point me to useful subreddits it would be truly helpful!)\n\nThe problem is my boyfriend. I should start by say that I realise how lucky I am to have a boyfriend who appreciates me as I am and doesn't pressure me into doing anything, I love that about him. \n\nThe problem is that whenever I mention losing weight he gets kind of pouty and says that he likes me the way I am. He says he likes my 'curves', but all I see is fat that needs to go. I'm scared that he won't like me as much if I lose weight.\n\nI would really like his support in this. I don't want to lose much, only 10kg/20lbs; but it would make a world of difference to my confidence. How can I get him to see that? I don't want him to find me unattractive, but I don't find myself sexy at the moment. Please help?", "summary": "Want to lose weight, boyfriend says he likes me the weight I am. Would really appreciate his support in losing weight, please help!"}
{"id": "t3_jt1kz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit Community-Little Sis just left for college. What can you tell her!?", "post": "Dear Reddit,\n\nMy younger sister just left for college a couple weeks ago. She is attending a legit University far from home and I couldn't be more proud of her.\n\nHowever, she has never really been away from home and almost ALL of her hs friends stayed at home. She has been having a really hard time dealing with the change. She has been getting anxiety and nervous attacks (which has NEVER happened to her before) and she is making herself sick with it. I want to help her out; help get her through the next hard month or two (I totally know how she is feeling - I just went through it a few years ago). \n\nSO....I am making her a little gift package with some cookies, a good book or two, and I want to make her a little scrapbook or notepad filled with advice from myself (I finished school last year, and lived away at the dorms for a year, away from home for a year, and in DCfor a semester), my parents, and YOU!!! \n\nSo besides joining the reddit community, WHAT is something you can tell her about college, life, anything!!! \n\nI will post up pics later of the package I send to her.", "summary": "younger sister moved away to college; having hard time dealing with the change. Want to make something for her to help her through it. Reddit - your turn to shine!!"}
{"id": "t3_2dm7z4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19/M] have been thinking about my first girlfriend [20/F] for like a month and I want to have her back. But is this a wise desire?", "post": "By my first girlfriend I am talking about my first, longterm relationship (If you can call 40 days long).\n\nBasicly, we broke up because I was an idiot. We dated last year when I was 18 and started socializing for the first time and man.. I was a complete idiot to people. I never had any interaction with a friend group and I found myself as a part of this big cosplay society, I had tons of friends, a nice girlfriend, really cool people to hangout with and then.. I became a real jackass, a real idiot. My girlfriend broke up with me, my friends stopped talking with me and everyone started to hate me, I was talking shit about them for no reason, acting like an idiot. After like 6 months, I improved myself massively, I am friends again with everyone once more, even better than before, I am the guy people talks when they have questions about many things ranging from comics books to science. I am now a better and more civilized person.\n\nAnd now, I want my girlfriend back, I dated a lot of girls after her but never been happy with any of them like I was with my first girlfriend. Now that I am a better person, I think I can have her back. But I don't know if I really want her back. I was happy with her but that doesn't mean I was never sad. She is an artist but not the most talented one, she can't draw very well even though she has art training. But she blamed ME when she couldn't enter an art school, just because I called her at 10 to wish her luck and turns out she went bed early and said \"You woke me up so I couldn't sleep, that's why I failed.\" and that really broke my heart. But in time, she became a better person just like I did. She is hard working, drawing better, doing lots of stuff.\n\nI can win her back I guess, but I am still not sure, I am also planning to study hard and leave this country to live in a better one.\n\nWhat do you suggest? Try my chance or don't even bother for something that already failed?", "summary": "I was an idiot, my girlfriend broke up with me, months past, not an idiot anymore, should I try to win her back or don't even bother?"}
{"id": "t3_4klx7u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my SO [18F] I just don't know what she wants...", "post": "The thing is that I been dating this girl for almost two months, but she has a boyfriend... When we first started talking she used to tell me about how shity this guy was with her, for example, he never took her out for dinner, never visited her, he prefered going out with his friends to drink, and almost never sends messages to her. The thing is that she tells me that she loves me and wants to be with me, but she doesn't break up with this guy...\nI made her confess to me that she still likes the guy a little, and that's hard for her to let him go. Then, that's not it... she got into this political party, in which young people like her go a participate with the candidate. Therefore, the coordinador from the party asked her to be his secretary, he's 25 years old. Since she got into it, she became different... she's cold and I been trying to let her go and become cold and when she sees that am about to leave her for sure, she start becoming sweet again... So there are two problems her boyfriend, and this new 25 year old guy that wants to get with her.\nOne could think, dude what the fuck are you doing there? But she helps and is friend with my brother, who's got a mental disease that makes him process as a 10 year old at his 18 years old, in school. There hasn't been a girl good enough to actually help my bro out, because many lose their patience... She good with him and makes him happy... she's leaving her boyfriend, according to her,next week so we can be together, but I'm still thinking about it because of the other guy... I suppose she's way too confused about her feelings... but whatever it is I want it to be over... I don't know if she really loves me or I'm just a game...", "summary": "She's got a boyfriend, and someone else is after her and she is falling little by little... but I feel like she's playing with my feelings even though she sometimes it seems like she actually loves me."}
{"id": "t3_1gmutf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[21M] and my ex[21F] of 6 months recently broke up and I can't get over her", "post": "So my ex gf and I dated for about 6 months. We hit things off really well and found we have incredibly similar tastes, hobbies, interests, etc, but failed to be compatible personality-wise. It was my first relationship so I had a good deal to learn and I wasn't exactly the fastest learner.\n\nAnyways, we jumped into the relationship very quickly, after maybe a month of talking, and had sex very soon. The beginning was nothing like I had anticipated and we had a ton of road bumps along the way but were always able to patch things up. Things eventually got much better after a big fight and we were together all the time and loved each other's company. Towards the end of the relationship I felt her pulling away. I consider myself the jealous type and I think that's for a couple of reasons: I have always been put down for my looks and developed a generally lower self-esteem, and also because she was insanely hot. From the moment she caught my eye till today, she has always been the most beautiful girl I have seen, and I always made sure she knew that. So my jealousy of whenever she'd talk to other guys was definitely something that was always present.\n\nBasically now it's all over and we're not even near each other distance-wise. I find myself missing her more every day and we still talk like friends but I just don't think I'll ever get over her... What do I do?", "summary": "Jealousy problems led to me losing an amazing person in my life and I don't think there's any way of salvaging it, let alone moving on."}
{"id": "t3_32j53l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21F] found out that SO [21M] of one year is also in an FWB relationship [22F]", "post": "Backstory: We had dated early in college and took  a break for a year or so. He was having sexual relations with [FWB girl] during that time we weren't together. We are now back together in a very best-friend-like relationship", "summary": "I've been with a casual boyfriend and we get along well. found out he also has a FWB relationship with a girl who's attitude is very sex-driven and somewhat pushy"}
{"id": "t3_3agqie", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should i [18/M] invite my friend [19/F] to my 19th birthday?", "post": "A bit if backstory on me: I have just finished my first year of uni. I went in with a girlfriend that was long distance and we broke up because we were distancing from so it was a way of protecting the possibility of getting back together later. We now see each other every holiday and she comes back next Saturday, the day of my party. \n\nMy friend: She is someone i met at uni for the first time and we became good friends. Recently i have been having difficulties with mild depression and she has been there. It would seem in the process she has begun to feel differently about me. She started giving off big signals and i know she has had basically no experience with guys romantically so i feel she may have become quite invested quite quickly when i started sharing stuff with her. My condition meant that i probably reciprocated attention more than i should have but that's in the past now and there isn't much to do about it\n\nThe situation: The party is small, 18 people going to a club with tables. My friend does not know about i yet and also doesn't know i will be getting back with my ex this summer (who'll obviously be at the party). The problem is i want to invite my friend because she is special to me and lives in the same city but if i am i feel i need to somehow let her know first what is happening with my ex. I can't just really talk to her about it because she has no idea i think she has feelings for me and if i'm wrong it could make things bad. Also if i do tell her what me and my ex will be doing that might change her mind on coming as she might now want to see us together which is fair enough. \n\nSo Reddit, do i ask my friend to come and ,if so, how do i tell her what's going on?", "summary": "Friend seems to have feelings for me. Getting back with my ex soon. Should i invite friend to party that my soon to be no longer ex will also be at?"}
{"id": "t3_f8gpq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Recently reunited with \"the one that got away\" and I want him back.", "post": "I dated a guy (23) for a very brief 3 or so months back when I was 18 (I'm now 26).  Due to my young age and stupidity, I cared more about partying at the time and ended up cheating on him.  I was honest about it and we broke things off (I of course regret my poor decision making at the time, and have never cheated in a relationship since).  We kept in touch for a couple years after wards until all communication eventually dissipated entirely.  \n\nI found myself thinking about him every now and then throughout the years.  Although we only dated briefly, he is one of the most caring, thoughtful, and most awesome people I have ever met and I've been kicking myself all these years for messing up something that was so great.\n\nLast week he showed up as a \"friend suggestion\" on facebook.  I could not resist the temptation and sent a friend request.  Now that we are facebook pals and I am seriously considering sending him an e-mail telling him how I feel.  Now that we're both older and wiser, is this out of line?  I want another chance, and feel that I will go above and beyond to make it work.  I also don't want to come off as creepy and would like advice on how to best approach this whole thing.", "summary": "Recently reunited with ex-boyfriend of 8 years ago and I want him back and need advice how to best approach the situation."}
{"id": "t3_2s5b1w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [20 F] of four years, caught her using dating websites. How do I confront her?", "post": "We have always had a closed relationship, we didn't have any social networks and didn't talk with opposite genders. However, when she moved out to a friends house, she changed. She made social networks behind my back, kept constantly controlling me, going out (she doesn't go to school or work) and kept lying to me. \n\nThe only reason I stayed with her was because I knew a breakup would really hurt me in school, especially during finals. I broke it off after school ended and she tried getting me back for a week until I started talking to her again. Things were fine and then she had to move a thousand miles away to her mothers house.\n\nWe decided to stay together long-distance since I graduate college in a year. She has been super nice to me but the past couple days she hasn't been texting me for long periods. I decided to look into it and I found out she has been using a dating website and snapchat to meet guys in her area. \n\nI made a fake account and started talking to her. She started flirting with me and telling me she doesn't have a boyfriends ect. I am going to call her in the morning, what do I say? I'm so broken crying and drinking my life away since I have no friends. My whole life was dedicated to her and school.\n\nThe thing that concerns me the most is that I won't be able to concentrate in school. It's my last year taking some hard engineering courses and I know this will tear me apart.\n\nHow do I concentrate in school while she's out having the time of her life? What should I tell her tomorrow morning?\n\nThanks in the advance for any support.", "summary": "Girlfriend of four years moved out of state, decided to stay in a relationship but found her using dating websites to meet guys in her area."}
{"id": "t3_2vmmye", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (21M) make a move on a shy girl (21F)?", "post": "My friend saw a video on Facebook that a girl we went to high school made for a musician the 3 of us like. So he messaged her and asked if shed be into making a video for one of the songs he's made. She said yes and that she was really excited to do it. Now I've been into this girl since high school(huge crush) but we barely ever talked and my friend knew this so he brought me along. \n\nSo there's 5 of us just hanging out working on this video having a good time. She's so down to earth and we like a lot of the same music so it's easy to talk to her.  At one point when we were talking one on one she wouldn't stop pushing her hair back behind her ears like she was nervous talking to me. And when she showed me a graphic design video she made and I told her it was really good she got a big smile on her face,  had no idea what to say and then muttered a thank you. \n\nShe then invited me and my friend to a party that her and her friend were having this Friday. I wanna let her know I'm into her at the party but Idk what to do. I'm afraid if I'm too forward she might get so nervous she won't know what to say. I know she used to act nervous around guys she liked in high school. Oh and I'm not Mr outgoing myself when it comes to girls so I just resort to trying to make them laugh and she laughed at most of the stuff I said. That's good right?", "summary": "Shy girl from high school seemed nervous talking to me and invited me to a party. How do I let her know I'm into her. Without freaking her out"}
{"id": "t3_3dkrbw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (27m) work with my ex (20f) and not sure how to be her boss at work.", "post": "Me and my ex recently broke up this last week, we had been dating for 9months. I don't agree with the break up, but she doesn't think we have what it takes to be a long lasting relationship. In her opinion we are close and good friends, but not great friends. And we should end it now, instead of wasting time and breaking up eventually. \n\nThe problem is, I'm a team leader at our work and am technically one of her bosses. We work at a call center and she will sit and talk with coworkers when they should not be. They will sit in queues that prevent calls from coming in, or miss calls and not log back in. I don't know how to tell them to stop messing around at work without it seeming like I'm targeting her out of spite. I actively walk around and keep the other employees focused and working as well. But i feel like she thinks I'm being strict on her due to the break up or jealousy. \n\nAt this point I almost feel like I have to let her get away with stuff, so that she doesn't go to upper management and say I'm targeting her specifically.", "summary": "not sure how to be ex's boss and have her follow rules without it look like im being strict due to break up."}
{"id": "t3_vvux1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Every time I go to see my girlfriend we have sex, then cuddle, then I go home. Is it wrong that it pisses me off?", "post": "I know, I know. Why should I be so mad that all we ever do is fuck, right? Well frankly it gets annoying, but neither of us have really anything in common. The only game she ever plays is Skyrim (which I do love) and when I try and get her to play other games with me she just snubs me off and tells me to \"stop trying to get her absorbed into video games\". We have no real common interests other than Reddit, and I am not entirely certain if I love her anymore. I mean I only see her once to twice a week now because I have gotten so tired of fucking that it just pisses me off. That being said I don't want to break up with her because I hate to see her sad. Every time I try and talk to her about it she says \"Alright, we'll fuck less\" then 30 minutes she tries to fuck me again. She really doesn't get it. She is smart (all AP classes, passes all of them with 80 or higher) but she just can't seem to understand the concept of not having sex. I have been avoiding seeing her lately because, well... I just can't. Not when I feel like this. What would you recommend I do?", "summary": "Me and my girlfriend have sex every time we meet, no matter how long for or how recently we last saw eachother, and it pisses me off."}
{"id": "t3_2szmpy", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "H and R Block giving out their 'Basic' Product for free (with a little effort), state file for $9.99", "post": "I accidentally clicked through the dialogues and entered me wanting to use their Basic product instead of the free one.  What they do is they trickily let you use the Basic product (or whatever you chose) to do your taxes, then when you are ready to file, hit you with the charge.  Upon checkout after spending an hour typing all my information, a charge for the product showed up with no way of downgrading.  \n\nClicked the chat dialogue, and the rep said that it was impossible to downgrade, and instead issued me a product key to get it for free!  It also includes 9.99 state filing, (down from $27 they charge you for the free edition).\n\nChat:\n\nBrandon R.: Hello T------, welcome to H&R Block Tax Product Support! How can I assist you today?\n\n------: I accidentally upgraded to the Basic and wanted to downgrade back to free \n\nBrandon R.: I can't downgrade your account from basic,however what I can do is issue you an key code. You will have to pay the 9.99 for the state return.\n\n------: The website said that you can downgrade my account though by going through chat.\n\nBrandon R.: Yes, but in your case I cannot downgrade to free, but I will be more than happy to issue you an keycode.\n\n------: What does the key code do?\n\nBrandon R.: It pays for the product and your federal return.\n\n------: Oh okay thanks\n\nBrandon R.: Just one moment while I get the key code for you.\n\nBrandon R.: Can I have your DOB, last 4 of your SSN.\n\n------: ******\n\nBrandon R.: Your keycode number is *****\n\n------: Thanks!\n\nnote: Through checkout, state filing showed up as $36.99, but when I entered the key code, it went down to $9.99", "summary": "Accidently clicked a button, got H & R block Basic for free, with $9.99 state filing, try to use keycode E2D5D7HBDA"}
{"id": "t3_33831z", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting drunk and not remembering what i did.", "post": "So before I start I should mention that I am bad with break ups.\n\nSo onto the fu. So yesterday i moved into my new house and the girl i was seeing lets call her Emily came round to hang out before work. Everything was fine and we were having a laugh and then she went to work, then later on i check my phone and see i have a whats app message from Emily saying that we shouldn't see each other anymore cause she wasn't ready for anything. We messaged each other about it and decided to start again as friends and see if things progressed.\n\nI was ok with the idea although i asked if we could talk about this in person as i wanted to know why the sudden change. she said yes so we planned to meet up today, however i decide that i am ready for a drink and head to the bar round the corner from my house with my flat mate i had a few too many drinks and only remember parts of the night and realized that the bar i got drunk in was where Emily worked.\n\nNow she isn't answering my texts and i think i might have done something stupid and might have lost her forever.", "summary": "The girl i was seeing wanted to just be friends, we agree to meet up and talk about it, i get drunk at the bar she works at, might have done something stupid, and now i think she is ignoring me."}
{"id": "t3_2puy0j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [25F] sort of seeing a new guy [late 20sM], but... he wears the same shirt all the time.", "post": "This feels like being in some weird Seinfeld episode, especially after seeing the episode of the girl that was doing this same exact thing!\n\nThis guy and I aren't really \"together\" yet, but he seems like a pretty cool dude, so we're seeing where things go.  The only thing is, every time I see him, he's been wearing the same. striped. purple. shirt.  Sounds petty, I know, but hear me out!  This has been spanning over multiple months since we first met.  Today I was on Facebook, and I saw that he was tagged in a few photos with his friends.  You guessed it - same shirt.\n\nI usually see him around once a week or so, so to my knowledge, he's not wearing it every day.  Still, it feels so weird!  This guy has a well-paying job, so it's not a financial issue. I feel like I'm making this into a big thing, but it's like... kind of hilariously surreal.  I have no idea how to even address this, or at what point it would be acceptable to address it.  I don't want to embarrass him.  His hygiene seems fine, and the shirt seems clean, but seeing him in this, and only this, vaguely grosses me out.  He even told me about going shopping with mutual friends a few weeks ago, so it's not like he's shopping-avoidant or something!\n\nDo I say anything?  If so, what should I say, and when should I say it?  Also, for what it's worth, if I see him in literally any other item of clothing in our future encounters, I wouldn't even consider bringing this up.", "summary": "This guy wears the same shirt every time I see him, wears the same shirt in pictures, etc.  It's weirding me out."}
{"id": "t3_34wafm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20 f) broke up with my boyfriend (24 M) of two years. Struggling with the follow through...", "post": "The relationship hasn't been working for a while now. Mainly due to a really really rocky start and incompatibility on a few really important things. We would fight constantly and those fights were nasty. Name calling, shouting, insults. And if I tried to go home during a fight, he'd sit on my car to physically keep me from leaving. We both hurt each other a lot. I recognize that it was pretty mutually abusive on an emotional level and while we both wanted to change, we never did. After nearly a year of constant fighting I just couldn't take it anymore and made the call to walk away last night.\n\nThat being said, Ive spent the last two years making this man my life. When we weren't fighting, I loved the person I got to be when I was with him. Not only did I love him with all my heart but his friends, family, and home became my own. On some level I know that going our separate ways is for the best but it feels like the end of the world right now.  There is a massive part of me that wants to call and tell him it was all a huge mistake, that the problems we have will all disappear if we love each other enough. I know its not true but it just hurts so badly right now...\n\nI dont know how to stay strong and stay away.", "summary": "Ended a mutually emotionally abusive relationship. I feel like Im losing my whole life. How do I stay strong and resist the urge to go crawling back?"}
{"id": "t3_31oo8g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31 F] with my husband [30 M] together 8 yrs, married 4 years. He seems to have lost interest in me? Nothing I do changes this...", "post": "My husband and I have been together for 8 years, married for 4. We have two kids, 4 and 1.5. It has been up and down though lately (last year or so) we have been getting along better at least (less fighting, less nastiness -he used to be quite verbally abusive, but this seems to have decreased, at least for now). \n\nThe problem -he seems to have no interest in doing things with me. He works, I am stay at home. I understand he's tired from working, but I am too -I do the childcare, errands, groceries, 90% of cooking and cleaning, taking kids to and from activities etc.\n\nHowever, I feel that we need to spend time together as a couple. He never seems to want to. He has his projects, and spends time with the kids (he is a great dad), but seems to have lost interest in me.\n\nI gained weight after my first pregnancy, which led to a lot of fighting and issues, however, by this time, I have lost all the weight, and am back to within 10 lbs of where I was when we met. Yet, losing the weight, keeping it off, and trying to do sexy times for the bedroom seems to have little effect -he seriously doesn't seem to be interested at all. I have tried to bring this up with him, but he doesn't seem to think it is a problem?\n\nI just want to get some of our intimacy as a couple back. I am afraid in a few years, when the kids are less dependent on us, we are going to have nothing in common. \n\nHow do I bring back the spark?", "summary": "2 kids, husband seems to have lost interest in me, doing things/dating/sex. Where to go from here?"}
{"id": "t3_3d1qc7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my GF [21 F] just hit our year anniversary, were going to move into a house together but decided to dial it back a bit", "post": "My Gf and I have been dating for as year as of the 7th of July. I moved in with her about 2 months into dating and it was good for a while. We were really good friends for about 5 years but we were both dating people at the time and it just didn't go anywhere. But now we are together and things haven't been going as planned.\n\nWe would always fight, make-up, and do it all over again. A lot of the problems were with my self consciousness and anger issues. I have worked a lot of them out to try to have a good relationship with her. We are extremely happy with each other about a week and a half per month.\n\nSo now, our lease at her apartment is up and we are renting a house together. We were both really excited about it. We move in on the 29th of july and our lease ended on the 8th of July. So there is a 3 week gap and we are forced to stay with our respective parents during the time. This is because we have two dogs. The dogs can't stay at my dad's house, and I cant stay at her dad's house. So we have to be separated. \n\nThis is where the problem started. I would always want to see her but it just didn't seem like she ever wanted to see me at all. Then, the other night it all came out. Turns out she stopped caring about our relationship a while ago and she just didn't care at all anymore. She says that she loves me, and I know she does. So we decide that moving in together again wouldn't be the best decision. \n\nWe are starting to date again and it is going awesome! it is very odd but something happened that made us fall in love again. I guess my question here is, what happened? Why are we so happy again when all that really happened was we decided not to move in together right away when the lease starts?", "summary": "Dating girl for one year with some problems, move in with our parents cause of lease gaps, decide not to move in again cause we aren't ready, now we are in the best part of our relationship ever. How??"}
{"id": "t3_4r4btn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [F27] talk to my nephew [11] about why his mom (my sister) and I are not talking?", "post": "My nephew has been asking me why I haven't been coming to their house anymore, since me and my sister had a huge argument a couple of months ago. I used to go there once every second week. I have been seeing my nephew and his younger brother outside the house. \nI'm not sure if I should talk to him about the fact that his mom and I aren't talking. I don't want him to feel bad about it. \nI'm sure my sister [F37] must have said something about me in front of the kids, she has a habit of talking bad about anything and anyone in front of her kids, and I'm sure she must have said something.", "summary": "sister and I had a fight. Nephew, sister's son [11] is wondering why I don't come to their house anymore. Should I talk to him about it or not?"}
{"id": "t3_4ykrs8", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Told my crush my feelings, and I got fucked up", "post": "Well, this is fucking awkward.\n\nI went to see my crush friend and to go on a rock festival with her. When I came to her city, we went to her home to wait for her friend (girl).\nIn the meantime, I was feeling that I shouldn't hold it to myself and I told her, can you sit by my side, I have to tell you something. She was like, \"no, you can tell me from here, I feel comfortable sitting on this chair\". I was like, \"what the fuck, can you just come please\", and she was \"nah, nah, let's just be a little creative and do it over messaging app\". In my desperation to confess my stupid feelings, I said, okay, let's do it. And I wrote her the message \"Hey, I am in love with you\" and she was like \"I know\", and started writing friends bullshit.\n\nThe most intimidating thing that made me cringe was the last sentence that she wrote me \"I don't see myself having sex with you\".\n\nIt would all be alright if she wasn't the one who was saying that she hates sex and doesn't like that stuff.\n\nAlso, she said \"thank you, it's good of you to say what you feel, I really apprecaite it\".\n\nSo, later on, when her friend had arrived, we went to that stupid festival and we were roaming around. In my brokenness, I was just following them two and they were asking random strangers for weed and shit, some of them wanted sex in return for weed and that's the point they went to some place.\nWatching that from aside literally killed me. I was just standing there and watching them go away, she turned back to me and looked at me, I looked back at her in a sad way, got my hand up, waved, put my head down and turned my back and I fled away.", "summary": "Had a crush on a girl who was explicitly saying that she hates sex, told her about my feelings, said to me that she doesn't see herself having sex with me."}
{"id": "t3_e8fx0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy as a treatment Anxiety?", "post": "I'm 22. Wasted 18-21 smoking (LOTS OF) pot, doing stupid shit, accumulating debt, etc. Developed a very anxious mindset of people's perception of me. My dad's entire side also have bad anxiety so I think that started really coming out as well. I've turned myself around from 21 til now.. Making good $$, paying off debt, exercising, eating well, etc... But I still have terrible anxiety. Sometimes I will feel *terribly* awkward in public, and I am horrible at meeting people for the first time. I am **deathly** socially paranoid when I'm high, if that makes any difference. I also feel like I missed out on some vital maturing into 'manhood', so I still feel like a kid and have a hard time affirming myself as an adult, even though I'm almost 23. I suppose that also has to do with me living at home, but I know it's the most responsible choice right now. Anyway, I refuse to drug myself up with Xanax or any prescription drug, but I know I most likely need some sort of treatment, whether it be a therapist or whatever. I've read some good thinks about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and am hoping my fellow redditors will have some insight, experience, helpful info, where to start, or whatever. Thanks in advance.", "summary": "I have terrible anxiety and negative/paranoid thoughts about myself. I read some very positive things about about CBT on reddit a few months ago and want to give it a try. Thoughts, comments, suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_1199u9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have been on the phone with AT&T \"Premier Customer Service\" 5 times in the past 24 hours and have been hung up 3 times while on 10+ minute holds. What is the worst chat/phone customer service you've ever received?", "post": "Ordered a new phone online through AT&T. Received order confirmation via email, but something told me to call. So, upon calling I was placed on hold for quite a while before the call disconnected. This has happened three times in the past 48 hours and only two more calls other than those three have been \"successful\" calls (successful meaning I wasn't hung up on, but still they could tell me nothing) - - - except the fact that I was so fed up with being hung up on that on the last call, I requested to have my order cancelled. She said she would and that I'd receive confirmation via email, which I never did. Got in touch with chat support online only to be told that my order had not been cancelled and that I'd have to call them again. I am in a **RAGE** over the incompetence.", "summary": "After being hung up on and lied to multiple times - AT&T customer service is a fucking joke, it's so bad. "}
{"id": "t3_43agg5", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by responding to anonymous boob text by sexting.", "post": "Technically, this happened last night, but whatever. \n\nI randomly received a text message from an unfamiliar number that was simply a pair of boobs. I was befuddled, because I am single, and never receive pictures of that nature. Off the bat, I could tell that their owner was obese, but they were nice boobs nontheless, so I simply said \"nice boobs\". \n\nI tried looking through my friends, social media, and Google to figure out the number, to no avail. She then sent me another picture, so I sent back a dick pic. We ended up chatting for a bit, and she explained that she was sad because she \"hadn't been appreciated in awhile\" to which I replied, \"I'm sure you're pretty, and a wonderful person\" (I was trying to be nice). \n\nAfter more texting, I decide to find out who it is. She says she knows me, and I know her, and decides to make me play \"guess who\" to figure it out. After 20 minutes of failed guessing, she sends a full body selfie in underwear, and I almost threw up. It turns out it's this lady from the bar who I've been trying to avoid, because I find her to be very unattractive and annoying. She had an out-of-state area code when I met her, but she switched to a local area code the night before sexting me. I feel like I have to avoid the bar for awhile.", "summary": "Got a random picture of boobs, sexted back, realized it was from some local girl who I think is ugly."}
{"id": "t3_33khl9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my ___ [18 F] 8 months, Super Tsundere Girl that I need help learning to work with.", "post": "Hey People,\nSo I've been in love (and dating) this girl for awhile now. She's really similar to me (my friends call her the female version of me). We both really like video games, drawing, programming, sex, and more.\n\nSo perfect right, why am I bitching? Well there's one big difference between us. I'm very calm and easy going. She's a massive Tsundere. She'll be very affectionate with me at times, but she's also very violent and will often suddenly attack me for odd reasons. Like the other day I joked about her being a dirty achievement hunter in Portal 2 (jokingly) and she threw both her shoes at me. I'm not sure if this is normal or if I'm doing something overly wrong.\n\nI figured I would ask reddit. (Also if the shoe throwing thing seems mild, the other night she got pissed at me for leaving milk on the counter and almost stabbed me with a kitchen knife. Two minutes later she whispered she wanted my babies (in front of my roomate)).\n\nSo yeah, help me reddit. I'm scared...", "summary": "Am I at fault here, is this normal behaviour? This is the first girl I've ever loved so I'm ew to the buisness."}
{"id": "t3_12zxqb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, who is/was your biggest role model (who you actually knew)?", "post": "I'll start. Like other redditors, I grew up as a nerd. From 3rd grade on, I was the class nerd. And it sucked. Even in the smarter classes, I was the nerd, just because I liked to learn. \n\nFast forward to my freshman year of high school. I was this awkward kid on a student government retreat with other students from all grades. I am social, but I used to come off kind of nerdy, and incredibly annoying. Anyway, I met this one senior, and I realized I was actually similar to this guy in a lot of ways; he was clearly smart, but at the same time he was funny, confident, and altogether a cool guy. He had it together, something I just didn't know.\n\nI ended up basically adoring him for the next 2 years, trying to be like him in any way I could. I've mostly grown out of that, but I've retained some good traits that I didn't have before. Now I'm comfortable approaching people my age who I don't really know, and I'm a lot less annoying to be around. If I hadn't met this guy, I don't know where I would be or if I would even have close friends.\n\nI know the guy is a redditor, too, so if you see this, thanks for everything.", "summary": "A guy I met my freshman year helped me go from complete nerd to social and fun-to-be-around kind of guy."}
{"id": "t3_11yrlm", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Ex-boyfriend [26/M] went full blown confessional on me [24/F] this weekend.", "post": "Long story short -- We dated for about a year and 1/2 I moved for my job we couldn't handle the distance and we end our relationship. Months go by, I see him Friday night and he is very poliet and nice and after we started drinking he started pouring his heart out to me. The next day he calls me twice in the morning and I missed the calls, try to call him back. Doesnt answer, wait a few days, send him a long message, and it said he read it, and has still said nothing. Should I pretend like it never happen?", "summary": "exboyfriend confessed he still has all these feelings for me when he was drinking, and now won't return my calls or messages."}
{"id": "t3_2tp3x4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] seeing a [30 F] both expats, she has a bf back home, need some advice", "post": "Hey so I moved to a new country for work. Here I met this girl who did the same thing. We met about three months ago when she moved here and when she did she had been with a boyfriend for about a year and at the time I didn't care much.\n\nWe've been getting closer to each other to the point we she or I stay over basically every weekend and spend a lot of time together. So I've gotten quite attached to her and some days I believe she has as well. I know she still talks to the other guy and I actually understand it. She says they are not bf and gf anymore (I didn't ask for this, she just came with this after the xmas break) but I can imagine you don't just undo a relationship like that overnight.\n\nSo I have some weeks when she is super lovely but then she suddenly starts being distant and hard to reach for a few days. It drives me crazy because she has been so non-vocal about everything. She just says she is tired and prefers to stay home than doing something with me. And then the weekend comes and she is all nice again.  \n\nThis is driving me quite crazy and I've \"decided\" to break it up like three times and every time I decide to wait for a while because a part  of me tells me that in the great scheme of things waiting for her for a while might be worth it. Another part of me tells me she is just having fun with me and I am idiot.\n\nAnyway, I don't know if I just wanted to share this or to actually just get some advice. Anything will work at this point to be honest. Am I an idiot? \n\nJust for clarification, we are both staying in the country for at least two more years and the bf does not have plans to move to this country so that is out of the question.", "summary": "I am an expat, she is an expat on the same country. We are seeing each other but she still has a relationship back home. Am I an idiot?"}
{"id": "t3_4fwua9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Be sure to explain in detaiNeed advice... Love (M / 24) my girlfriend (F / 24) and childhood friend (F / 22).", "post": "I've been dating my girlfriend for about 2 years and it's great. Things have settled/calmed down (which isn't a bad thing). I still very much enjoy spending time with her and can truly say that I love her. However, I have a female friend that I've known for almost my whole life and although I'm sure we've had \"thoughts\" of being together, neither of us have ever brought up the topic or pursued for that status. That is... until now. \n\nI can't say for certain when it began to happen or what caused the sudden \"click\". This friend and I have been talking more and hanging out more (maybe due to my gf living hours away now because of grad-school). Which wasn't a problem before because we always labeled one another as friends and only friends. But as of lately our conversations have become more than just friendly conversations (many more compliments given to me /  slight flirting). There was a point where we were walking together and our hands kept bumping into each other and we kind of just gave each other this stare... almost as if we both wanted to hold hands. I'm an idiot for letting myself get into this situation, but I think I can truly say that I love both girls.", "summary": "I love my girlfriend who I've been with for years, but also now love my best friend that I've known since my childhood."}
{"id": "t3_4i3o8r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (16m) and SO(17f) of 7 months, at track practice earlier today he'd coach told her and a few other athletes that they need to stop \"exercising so much\" exercising meaning sex after further elaboration. Eventually leading to him threatening to not take my gf to districts which is this Saturday.", "post": "So a bit of background and sorry for any typos this is on my phone. My girlfriend has been in track the past two seasons usually placing top 3 in her main event and top eight in the other two. Recently she has refused to do one of her side events due to an injury that is worsened by said event which I believe to be why the coach has done this.  \n\nSo on to the story, today at track everything goes as normal until about 30 minutes in when her coach calls her and about 5 other people in relationships over (side note: none of these peoples SO's including me distract at any sort of track practice or event.) and tells them they could be throwing and running so much better if they would stop \"exercising\" so much.  He asks if he needs to clarify and my girlfriend says \"yes what do you mean?\" Knowing exactly what he meant. He tells them then they need to stop having sex. My girlfriend walks away after this and he follows her and tells her he doesn't appreciate how she acted when she said that and is now considering not taking her to districts. My girlfriend listens to this then goes and begins to practice her event obviously upset until practice ends and I come and pick her up. \n\nMe and her both have no clue what to do and whether or not we should report him to the school. I'm just asking for advice on how to handle this situation.", "summary": "coach tells my girlfriend and a few other they need to stop having sex. One thing leads to another and he threatens to not take my girlfriend to districts on Saturday"}
{"id": "t3_25i9xc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my girlfriend[24 F] have been dating for 2.5 years, having problems, is it time to call it quit?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 2.5 years. We moved in with each other about 1.5 years ago and everything was fine. I am enrolled in school full time, working 25 hours a week, and in the process of starting a business. She is in school part time and works a full time job. My day starts at 7am, her day starts whenever she wakes up.\n\nLately,  we have been getting on each other nerves, and she has been doing things that just make me angry and annoy me to no ends. We constantly bicker back and forth. She constantly reminds me what she brought into our apartment. An example is, \"why do you flop in the couch, it is because you didn't pay for it\". I am not flopping in anything. \n\nShe also wants to cuddle but I am always doing homework and something else, then she complains that I don't spend any time with her. We don't really go on dates anymore, and our sex life is about once a week, which I am fine with because my sex drive isn't that high, but she is not.\n\nWe nearly broke up a year, but manage to fix things, but unfortunately they were just temporary fixes. Is it time to call it quits?", "summary": "Girlfriend and I have been dating for 2.5 years, been getting on each other nerves and both are very busy with everything. Is it time to call it quits?"}
{"id": "t3_de1jy", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Unrelated (I hope) question from the eating disorder thread", "post": "Reading through (most of) [this] thread, I'm curious if there's a classification of eating disorder not related to perceived attractiveness?  More specifically, take that classic skinny nerd who cries 'high metabolism' but only manages around 1500 calories/day of mostly processed crap.  Say he/she knows this, is bothered by it, and still can't change it?  Not like they don't want to badly enough to do something.  But say there's been repeated efforts to increase daily intake (and quality), but meals go unfinished and eventually unprepared.  Even writing this I'm thinking 'buck up or stop whining'... but I'm legitimately curious to see  if this area has been explored professionally, or at least hear some personal accounts or clever flames.\n\nI've dated a girl and later found out an eating disorder started about the same time of our relationship.  There was plenty else going on, but just recently had another tell me she felt too chubby around me to actually date.  She has a fantastic body that I would guess falls right into average/healthy.", "summary": "version:  Can you have an eating disorder without excessive dieting, concern for weight or image, and could it be somehow reversely contagious?"}
{"id": "t3_503nla", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Want to pick things up between me [27/M] and girl from tinder[22/F] after a few dates.", "post": "Hello,\n\nSo I live in the Philippines, moved here a few weeks ago, and man, it is so easy to meet people here. Ridiculously easy. There are many reasons, I know; some less than honorable.\n\nI have met a few women on Tinder here, and they just wanted to have fun with a buncha different guys. I have been talking to one [22/F], have met up with her twice now, and we have been doing it like animals after our dates. After the second time, I told her that I might start getting more serious with her because I don't like just fooling around. Her attitude since then has been positive and receptive about it; we are actually meeting again tomorrow at my place and I am making dinner (paella, she loves that stuff), then taking her out to the rooftop to check out the beautiful view of Makati City. We have kinda talked and have both decided to have a serious talk when she comes.\n\nHowever, my issues stem from when she was leaving the other day, she had to shower and left her phone unlocked on the bed, and I saw a message from some guy it looked like she was making plans with. I don't know if she followed through or what not, but I always overthink things regardless and let it stress me out. \n\nSome people tell me 'you aren't together, let her do her thing; but if you do go official, it has to stop of course' and others 'drop that sh*t right now, you ain't got time for that'. It's super confusing.\n\nThe best I can think of right now is to just do what I wanted to do and check the phone [issues! i know], and not say anything about anything, just handle it appropriately and with class/dignity.", "summary": "possible tinder tramp, should i give in to my trust issues before asking for a more serious thing between us?"}
{"id": "t3_14b7lc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "In honor of finals week, I'd like to ask Reddit, what is the most amount of work you had to do in only a short period of time?", "post": "For me, it was about a month ago where i procrastinated a week of work and had to do it all in a single day. It may not be a lot for some of you more experienced college kids/ working men/women, but for me i was swamped.\n\nHere is a list of the work i had to do:\n\n1. A 10 page term paper that was required to include 10 sources (2 of which from actual books and not the internet) in APA style format. \n\n2. A 2 week nutrition diary that i had to include times of day and the calories that each item had, which of course i completely bullshitted.\n\n3. A 6 page research paper of our choice with 10 sources MLA style\n\n4. (Because I'm studying exercise science) A Detailed workout regiment of at least 3 times per week that i have done and what affect they have plus the duration/rep count/intensity/sets.\n\n5. Practice and conditioning for baseball - trust me this does eat up a lot of god damn time, plus the time it takes to get ready, get to the field, and to shower afterwards.\n\n6. Actually going to class - I'm going to throw this in there because it did eat up a good portion of the time i could have been working on the work mentioned above.\n\nAgain, this may not sound like a lot, but each of these activities were very time consuming and it took many energy drinks, a sleepless night,  and a damn good amount of motivation to complete aka not getting on Reddit. Also i had to turn down all my friends that wanted to hang out. Btw this was over the span of 2 days because it's a mix of my Monday-Wednesday-Friday classes and my Tuesday-Thursday classes.", "summary": "I procrastinated and had a SHITLOAD of assignments due in the next two days and by some miracle i managed to finish them all before deadline."}
{"id": "t3_12kztz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "uh-oh. crushing on my advisor mega.", "post": "Dr. X used to be my professor. He is in his 30s. I am 24. I switched my major and he is now my advisor and I am completely crushing. He is single and has asked me to do research with him.\n\nI need to know what I should do? Will this work out or is it a bad idea? We seem to have quite a bit in common and our conversations are really easy and flow. I just know we will be working together over the next two years and it will develop if we are into it. I am just at the point where I just want to see him every second and tell him, hey, I like you.", "summary": "I like my advisor. He likes me, too. How can I move this relationship along, or do I need to?"}
{"id": "t3_2urveb", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Should I seek professional tax help?", "post": "I have always done my own taxes. My father always did his, and, throughout my childhood, I had a helping hand. As the world began to transition into the land of the Internet Of Things, my father would do his pen and paper taxes, then have me help him translate that into TurboTax. He would scrutinize and, once he was satisfied, we would submit his return and I would get cake.\n\nAs I grew up, this is how I always filed my own personal income tax returns. Fairly straightforward. Many people do it. It's always worked for me, I've never run into any serious problems, I've always gotten a return (although it's never enough, but whose is?)\n\nThis year, however, is a complicated tax year for me. I moved to a state that charges state income tax with my previous employer. They took care of the state taxes on the front end, but I ended my employment with them in August and have been working since then employed elsewhere, so the state taxes for that portion of the year were not taken care of. I also cashed in my 401k early. I know, it's a big no-no, but sometimes you really have to, and I did. \n\nI earned no other income than what was earned through employment with companies one and two. I earned no out of state income this year.\n\n**bold", "summary": "I'm concerned that the expenses of seeking professional tax help will outweigh the benefit, and would like to know if within these circumstances I'm knowledgeable enough to do it myself."}
{"id": "t3_chncz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I'm quitting a job, but my boss just increased  my salary!", "post": "I'm currently working in an Investment Bank, and by god, I hate it so much but I've been staying on because the money was good. Recently, after a series of argument with my boss (she's a female) I decided to leave the company for good... until today. \n\nI realized she increased my salary by two times!! Two bloody freaking times. I know that if I step out of this bank, I'll never see that kind of salary at my age (I'm 26) and it will take at least 10-15 years before any other companies would offer that  kind of salary to me.\n\nI'm in a limbo now. I hate the working hours that usually runs late into morning and I have to pull almost 100-120 hours a week at work, but the salary is mouth watering! Wtf do I do?? HELP", "summary": "Work sucks and lots of arguments with female boss, but got a raise that no other companies can match. Wtf do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_gf1rt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My roommate is gone for a month, and his friend needs a place to stay for a few days. Is this a big mistake?", "post": "A little backstory:\n\nI have been renting a place with a roommate whom his dad owns. The living arrangement turned out great since I didn't have to sign the lease so I can back out anytime I want, and his dad is pretty laid back. \n\nPrior to my roommates leave, he and his friend would come over and chill, which I was totally cool with. Now, my roommate is in rehab for heroin use for the second time and wants to house his friend to \"get his act straight.\" I don't know him or trust him since he has a history of heroin use and still might be. To make matters worse, the gutters above my balcony and found about 25 syringes. I'm not usually paranoid, but I have a lot of valuable items in the general area that could be prime candidate for pawning (i.e: surround system speakers, tv, and game systems). Also my roommate had asked if it was alright to copy a set of keys for his friend in which I responded, \"Hell no.\" I already have my BR door key-locked.\n\nI have yet to talk to the dad or my roommate about these issues, but that is my top priority after work today.", "summary": "Roommate ex-junkie friend is living with me (just us two), how do i smooth this out?"}
{"id": "t3_2cmpi3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24M] am having trouble dealing with my GF[23F] breaking up with me, please help", "post": "So, my gf and I have been together for almost 3 years. They have not been perfect but who's relationship is? I have had an incredible time and I love her very much though. We broke up about 2 months ago, and have since been still seeing each other and hooking up occasionally, during which, I have been taking the time to really do fun and nice things with her which we didn't do much of before in our relationship like going out on dates etc. Things were going great up until the other day, when out of the blue she said she wants to stop. She says she doesn't see our relationship going anywhere and wants to just be single. Of course, my head goes crazy thinking she's found someone new, has a crush on someone, or is possibly hooking up with my ex-best friend (which is a long shot, even for me to believe but it's still there in my head) I am having a terrible time dealing with this, as my life has been spiraling downward over the past 2 months. We broke up, I lost my living arrangements, lost my friends, and just last weekend lost my job. And now I'm gonna lose her too. I'm so lonely and scared. I'm in a new place with no one to comfort me and be with me and I don't wanna lose her. It's not just the sex either, I don't wanna lose hanging out with her, having fun and experiencing life together. I can't say she's marriage material for me, but I still love what we're doing. I don't know what to do. Part of my head says she's right it may not work out, but the other part of me is screaming to do anything to keep her in my life. Please reddit, any advice or help would mean the world to me.", "summary": "GF of 3 years wants to break up for real, having a tough time accepting it while going through a rough time in my life"}
{"id": "t3_2b3r6d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my 22 [F] of 3 months.", "post": "How do you deal with prolonged periods of no sex. Its been like 3 weeks and we've had sex once when I woke up horny at 4am and initiated.  Now the first of the 3 weeks she had her period so that's understandable, then we were staying with her family for a few days and she didn't want to have sex in their house.  Then she went on vacation for another week so that is about 2.5 weeks.  But there was a couple days between where we had the opportunity and she didn't want to have sex.  Then she got back from vacation and I only asked one thing, that she shave/wax/trim so when she gets back I can have something nice to work with.  She didn't but I wasn't going to complain because I feel like that is a selfish thing to complain about.  I brought it up and she said it was nothing, but I still couldn't get it out of my head.  Talked to her again about it because she could tell it was bothering me still and she just says she's been tired from work and busy with school, which she has.  But I still get a little ego hurt when she doesn't want to have sex.(She early on said she usually is quite horny and for the first 2 months she was).  I feel like a total dick because I let it affect me and change my mood making our time together not as fun, but at the same time I do need to feel sexually wanted.  I am conflicted between being an ass for wanting sex and feeling bad about that and then also the lack of sex, just creating a huge mix of emotions.  How do you cope with that?", "summary": "How do you cope with your emotions in those prolonged times of stress where your partner just isn't in the mood for sex?"}
{"id": "t3_3gyzlo", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not taking an umbrella with me to work.", "post": "Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah\n\nEven more\n\nBlah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah", "summary": "I misread the weather report this morning and it's been heavy showers all afternoon. I have a 2 mile walk home. FML."}
{"id": "t3_209h49", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need help with my long distance relationship. I am 19 M, she is 20 F", "post": "I met a girl a few months ago online.  I was instantly attracted to her, there was just something about her that I loved, but cannot explain.  We texted a lot, then started talking on the phone.  We are constantly talking to each other, and tell each other that we love each other.  I truly love everything about her, and want to be with her.  We live 12 hours away btw.  We eventually decided to meet each other in June.\n\nThere is one problem though.  Every now and then, she says that she is not good enough for me.  That I should just find a better girl, because she is not what I want.  She is afraid that when we meet, that I will not like who she is.  I also fear that she will not like me in person.  I am sure that I will love her in person, the way I do now.\n\nI have tried so hard to tell her how much I love her, and that she is everything that I ever wanted, because she is.  She just keeps thinking that she is not good enough for me.  \n\nWhat can I do?  What should I do to let her know that she is the girl that I want?\n\nsorry about the poorly written post", "summary": "My long distance girlfriend is afraid that I will not like her in person, and that she is not good enough for me."}
{"id": "t3_2q3rv1", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I am proud of myself. (Sorry if this seems like bragging)", "post": "To begin things, I am a very passive guy, am generally liked, and I never want any trouble (Dont ever fight). Yesterday, I went to a hockey game and two average sized picked on my buddy. I being the guy I am, walk up to them to ask them to please stop. They told me \"what are you gonna do about it tough guy?\"\n\nI am 6\"5 about 260 lbs. I looked down in amazement as I outweighed the little buggers and appeared to be intimidating one of them (the talker seemed intoxicated). I look at both of them kinda shocked (being the major size difference) ..and even though every ounce of me wanted to show my strength....I held back..shook my head..and walked away.\n\nThe one kid says to another as I turn around \"maybe we should leave\"....I say without looking back, \"you probably should\". I walked away and they tried to say something about my posture..but I did not listen, I had already walked away and made up my mind.\n\nI just have always been a person of much self control and it isn't easy when you know you possess some physical strength..but I am proud of the man I am and never let my size take over my intelligence. \n\nSorry if this came across as gloating...I am just proud of myself for being a nice and peaceful guy.", "summary": "Went to Hockey Games, Punks challenged buddy and I to fight essentially, Even though I feel confident, showed self control walked away. Didn't go to jail"}
{"id": "t3_1rovrf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my wife [27 F] of 3 years, She has a straight-male friend. Details inside, I want your opinion.", "post": "So she works with this straight single male colleague of our same age.  They are like buddy-buddy, text each other all the time (way more than she texts me for sure), they laugh and joke together, and she actually invited him to her family's house for thanksgiving because he had no family in town (this was today.)\n\nI'm not worried about cheating but he rubs me the wrong way, he slapped her ass one time as a joke at a party (I saw it) and I gave him a very serious statement about how I felt about that right then and there (not aggressive, just very assertive.)\n\nI've never been a jealous type of person, I have a few female work friends myself, almost never text them, especially not just general conversation stuff, and I don't hang out with them outside of work.  I never do that because I have a wife and I thought it would be pretty inappropriate for me to do as a married man.\n\nI'm not comfortable at all with this at all, my wife doesn't get why.  Am I over-reacting to this or is this in line with regular relationship expectations?", "summary": "Wife has a buddy-buddy straight single male friend that rubs me the wrong way; am I out of line for not really feeling comfortable with this?"}
{"id": "t3_2tjuij", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by taking a sip of my drink while watching a series.", "post": "So this happened... around 2 minutes ago. (Oh an actual fuck-up that happened on the day itself? yup.)\n\nI was casually watching my anime. One Piece in this case, having paused it to grab a new bottle of coke(coca cola). As I resume the series I take a few huge sips from the bottle while watching, I hold in my laugh to finish what I have in my mouth and stupid me decides to take another huge sip. My mouth full of coke as I can't retain my laughter, spouting it all over my laptop, out of my nose and mouth. The result: My laptop is sticky as hell as i'm cleaning it as much as possible while typing this from my mobile.", "summary": "Was drinking coke as a funny moment came by, coke all over my laptop making it feel sticky as if someone forgot to clean their laptop after.. you know what."}
{"id": "t3_1hlx2p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[20M] broke up with my [21F] girlfriend 2 months ago and I still can't get it out of my head.", "post": "We were dating for 1 and a half years and both go to the same school. Things were going really great, but, like in all relationships, that spark had seemed to settle down. Things were really comfortable, don't get me wrong. But I felt like I was missing out. I decided to break up with her. I really didn't have a great reason to do so except for the fact that I wanted to try out the single life again.\n\nHanging out with her was always fun, but sometimes I was genuinely bored to be around her. We were very open about our feelings and would always let each other know when/why the other was feeling down, so the communication was there. But sometimes the conversations were just the same repeated stuff over and over and over again. I tried to expand on them, but it just seemed to go back to the same boring conversations.\n\nAll in all, I felt like being single again and stepping away from the comfort zone. She was very devastated by it and I could barely take it as well. After the initial breakup, it did feel like I had a huge relief lifted off of me, as I had been considering it for about a month or so. A few days later, I was ridiculously upset, but not sure if it was because I had lost HER or lost the RELATIONSHIP.\n\nI deleted myself off of Facebook for awhile, and she did the same. I saw her again today since I reactivated my account and fucking lost my mind and broke down in tears. I feel like an idiot. I really loved this girl and now I feel like I lost her for no fucking reason.\n\nDuring the course of the breakup, I texted her twice to see how she was doing (I know I broke NC) and I got no response. I understood, but it still hurt. \n\nI feel like I don't deserve to be hurt since I was the one that initiated the breakup.\n\nI'm sorry if this is very vague and scatter minded, I'm just looking someplace to vent and maybe get some good advice on how to get the fuck over it.", "summary": "I feel like shit for breaking up with my gf of 1.5 years for no really good reason. Saw her picture again today after keeping relatively no contact for two months and I lost my shit and began sobbing."}
{"id": "t3_33m6vv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30F] with my BF [35M] 8 MO, do I stay or do I go?", "post": "Been with this guy for a couple of months now and since I feel pressured to get married sooner than later I have been evaluating out relationship for long term potential. I have some quick annoyances I think might become future issues and would like your input.\n\nOne. He never says he loves me. He told me he loved me a couple weeks ago, but despite seeing me pretty frequently he rarely tells me he loves me. Most couples tell each other they love each other constantly. Is this a red flag?\n\nTwo. He's friends with a lot of attractive women on facebook and instagram. He is constantly liking pictures (and getting likes on his pictures) from women that he used to date. He has told me these are non-issues, but I'm sure most women feel insecure when their man is liking pictures of other women on social media. For the record, some are in committed relationships. How do couples navigate social media?\n\nThree. He makes no effort to detail his past dating history. He does not hide his past, but he does not make an effort to inform me of everything that has occurred in the past. If I want to know if he used to date someone I have to ask. Is this shady behavior?\n\nFour. I didn't go to college and he is attending pharmacy school. While I have a stable job, and he's in school, I worry whether or not this inequality of education will become an issue for us in the future. What do you think? \n\nGenerally speaking, what kind of relationship red flags do you guys look for?", "summary": "I'm getting serious about this guy, I want input as to whether obsessive facebooking and lack of verbal affection are red flags."}
{"id": "t3_4w4grv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my mother [56 F] a few months, highly irresponsible and asking me for money", "post": "Hello, it's me again. Please read my first topic on this matter:\n\nEspecially the short background info. I've found a flat and moved away from my toxic parents. Everything was great until my mother came back from abroad, where she has a job.\n\nThe matter is, I thought she'll forget about the idea of me taking credit for her. Unfortunately I was wrong. Not only the topic returned - she literaly guilts me into this. She keeps talking that she feels like dying, that she stopped eating and she's loosing weight, and that it's probably cancer. All this comes from terrible financial problems she has right now.\n\nTo be honest, those terrible financial problems are something I remember from childhood. All my life she had those, and later she stole some amount of money from old employer and was forced to pay it off. To do this, she emigrated and now she earns two times more money than myself. Still, her debts are not getting smaller. They seem just as big as 7 years ago when she left the country. Just now she called me with the news that she needs fast help - she took another loan and now she must quickly pay it off. Of course it's because she didn't read contract carefully enough. That kind of things happen to her all the time.\n\nUnfortunately she knows that I earn stable money. I know that I'm the only one person that can rescue her. Literally no-one in my family is financially reliable apart from me. BUT if I do this, she will make another stupid decision and I will have to rescue her again. I'm not in the position to do this - I ended my education, found a job, moved out and now I'm stabilizing myself financialy after really chaotic childhood and college-hood. I'm not willing to going there again.\n\nI'm seriously thinking about going absolute no-contact with her. I only worry that she could do something to herself... I feel cruel, guilty, ungrateful bitch. I'm her only child.", "summary": "Mother has serious financial problems, is highly irresponsible and asking me for taking high loan. Feeling like crap, going to say no."}
{"id": "t3_2tyth9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my ex-girlfriend [20F] of 5 months, I want to talk to her but I'm scared.", "post": "For most of my life, I've been too much of a loser to have a girlfriend. Last year, through some mutual friends I met a girl and everything was absolutely fantastic. The entire time we were dating I was on top of the world, she was caring, sweet and I could tell her anything.\n\nAround Valentine's Day however, she started becoming distant, telling me everything was fine but she'd ignore me and would barely look at/touch me when we were together.\n\nEventually one night I asked her to tell me what was wrong and she went on to list me a bunch of things she hated about me that weren't necessarily true. She called me jealous, claimed I didn't mean the nice things I'd said to her, just to name a few.\n\nIt destroyed me, but I kept strong because she told me she was struggling with depression and I wanted to make her better. I loved this girl more than anything.\n\nA couple days later, she broke up with me. She said I hadn't done anything wrong, that she still wanted me in her life and that it wasn't necessarily final.\n\nIn the following months, she deleted me off everything, ignored the two attempts I made at texting her and ran from me when I tried to talk to her in public. She later referred to me as He Who Shall Not Be Named when explaining to her friends all the other guys she'd been sleeping with.\n\nI think she may have cheated on me with another guy before ending it, or at least she ended it to be with him.\n\nI miss her still and I was driven to a long depression that I still haven't fully recovered from. I feel like a monster, I want to talk to her still and understand what happened or why she hates me.\n\nI keep almost texting her, but I'm paralyzed with fear.", "summary": "I want to talk to my ex girlfriend who destroyed me, but I'm scared she won't want to talk to me still."}
{"id": "t3_2kiw8p", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Dog ownership for travelers: yay or nay", "post": "Me: 23yo nomadic journalist (postgrad has consisted of three writing fellowships in three states), weekend shelter dog walker and socializer. I've been surrounded by dogs my whole life, and spending lots of time at the shelter has helped fill that doggie void\u2014but I've been fighting the urge to have my own pup for more than a year and I'm wearing thin.\n\nA dog is a HUGE responsibility, and as an adventure travel writer (whose ideal job situation might require her to be up and at 'em at a moment's notice), I worry that I can't give a dog a more-than-adequate life\u2014I also worry that I might resent a dog that limits my flexibility, and I'd HATE myself for resenting a dog because of my mistake (b/c dogs are pretty much the best). \n\nSo what I'm wondering is, is it possible to live a travel-filled life with a dog that doesn't completely break the bank or make you wish you'd never adopted/bought? Can I hostel and backpack and train ride through Europe, for instance, without having to pay 200/night for a dog bed? Will I totally destroy a dog's sense of security by not giving it a steady home? \n\nThat said, I haven't PLANNED a huge backwoods excursion yet, but I want to, and likely will, and think that should factor into my adoption decision. I've worked in office environments (though, granted, casual offices) thus far and even then, worry that I might not be able to bring my dog to work. I've lived with people who caged their escape-prone animals during the day and it BROKE MY HEART.\n\nI read than New Yorker article recently about Emotional Support Animals, and while it's a really sleazy evasion of the lacking legal system for most people, I'm so tempted to try and get 'certification' for a dog so I can take it on planes (the dog I've got my eye on is 40lbs, and I've emailed some airlines to check their ESA weight/size limits if they don't already list them, which some do) and to work, regardless of company policy.", "summary": "People who've successfully done the dog travel thing, tell me how you did it and if you're glad you did it; devil's advocates, come at me."}
{"id": "t3_2anr1g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [35 M] with my GF [24 F] flirt since 2 years, together since 1 month - Can you help me keep her?", "post": "So I'm 35 and I'm with this 24 year old girl who is as hot as the sun. Like she is reaaally beautiful, always happy/friendly/positive/funny/clever... \n\nShe is amazing and I like her way too much. I'm used to being in relationships where the girl is more addicted to me than I am to her, so this is new for me and I feel like a total emo retard.\n\nDon't get me wrong, she really likes me too, and we have something special going on. But she likes me as a 24 year old teen can like you... with this careless attitude, this lack of initiative and very hard to read way of showing she likes me...\n\nRight now we are separated by the atlantic ocean, for 2 more months. Every 2 day that I don't hear from her, I get in total panik mode and start thinking OH MY GOD it is FUCKED, she met someone else, I lost her. Of course I don't show her any of this, but this is a fucking awful and paralyzing feeling I would like to stop having. I'm used to being pretty independent and having enough stuff in my life going on that I normally wouldn't be like that. But this time, this girl, I just fucking really like her too much and she is under my skin all the time.\n\nSo I write her songs (I'm a music producer) or make her all kind of little surprises, that I know she enjoys a LOT, but other than showing she loves it, never really does the same for me.\n\nMy question is, how could I reach a point in this relationship where I stop worrying that much that imma loose her, and even better, how can I revert the situation to the one I'm used to, where she cares about me even more! Aaaah so comfortable :p I'm joking, I really like her and she can't care about me too much.\n\nThanks. Geeez. I like her so much that I need to dump her xD", "summary": "! I'm too addicted to this girl. How can I stop worrying like HELL that it's all going to fuck up each time I don't hear from her for 2 days?"}
{"id": "t3_42odwc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M]considering breaking up with my long distance [19 F] S/O of 2.5 years, looking for advice.", "post": "Hi Reddit, I am currently around 500 miles away from my S/O and plan to stay at this university for the rest of my degree (3-4 years left depending on my decision). I am in a long distance relationship that only became long distance this fall. We have been dating for 2.5 months.\n\nWe've had a complication before and that was me, dancing with a girl at a party and she turned around and kissed me (I didn't stop her). I told her the next day and we broke up for sometime. I still think about this phone call and how she reacted and it fucking rips me apart. I knew it had to be done, and it was like a brick was lifted off my chest but the fact that I put someone I care about like that into an emotional state like that just ruins me.  \n\nI love this girl and I have imagined spending the rest of my life with her but I feel like I am missing out on the experience of being single since I've been in a relationship for basically all of my young adult life. I just want to have no worries and to be able to focus on me (Sometimes I struggle with happiness and didn't do very well last term) and go out and have fun but I'm also scared ill regret breaking up with her or crush her.\n\nI don't want her to feel pain or cry or resent me, this girl has been a huge part of the person I am today and I love her to death. I know if I did it I'd have to call her since texting is considered rude and un-thoughtful but I don't know if I'm ready to hear her heart break over the phone or if I even want to go through with this.", "summary": "Thinking about ending my relationship, can't decide if it's the right thing to do. Just looking for some sage advice or outlook on this situation. I can provide additional information if there is anything key that I missed."}
{"id": "t3_35v0on", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [24F] being overly sensitive about my boyfriend of 6 months [25M]'s excitement over getting a new job?", "post": "I am currently in a relationship with a man I've known since I was a teenager. While we love each other, we both know that we are going to go our separate ways when he moves in a little over two months.\n\nThis has been painful, but we both feel that at the time we are in our lives it is important to live a little, and long distance isn't for us.\n\nI have been trying to make the transition easier. I asked him to please try to keep our relationship light until he leaves. I asked him to no longer say that he loves me, because it just makes it harder. He keeps saying it, although I don't say it in return.\n\nIn addition, he keeps talking to me every time something new happens with the job or brings up the job in ways that aren't necessary. For example, \"They just got off the phone with my references for a final confirmation!\" or \"Don't make fun of me for \"x\", it is valuable in the field I'm going into\", \"I hope I make new friends before \"x\" holiday!\"\n\nI feel like I'm just being overly irritable because I'm stuck here and he is moving on to bigger and better things, but at the same time, I feel like he is being really insensitive about the situation.\n\nShould I tell him how I feel, or not bother?", "summary": "Boyfriend won't stop talking about his new job, and it is getting annoying because I think I am irritable."}
{"id": "t3_410vs5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 19(M) soon to see GF(20) after 4 months of long distance", "post": "Hello redditers, \n\nFirst topic post on Reddit. \nSo, I went to study abroad in the United States for 5 months. My GF is coming after 4 months of us being separated(we met in the same town and spent a lot of time together, before I left). Today I spoke with her over the phone, and she told me she was very excited, but also nervous and afraid. She was afraid that maybe one of us didn't feel the same after such a long time. We haven't had any major fights while we've been apart, and we've talked every day and tried to do everything to let the other one feel loved. Am I overreacting when I think she might leave me? I must admit I'm afraid too. It feels like a vague memory, since I haven't seen her for so long.", "summary": "haven't seen my GF for 4 months, she and I are both nervous to see each other. How to cope?"}
{"id": "t3_dxf7x", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Advice on dealing with outrageous phone company customer service???!?  Help?", "post": "Hello Reddit, long time listener, first time caller.\n\nI will start with some back story here.  \n\nTowards the end of July my Cellphone began to power down fairly frequently (at least twice a day, often more), knowing that I had about a month left on my warranty, I went directly to the store where I bought my phone, and explained the problem. They assured me that it would be taken care of, and placed an order for a loaner phone to be sent to me house, along with all of the packaging etc necessary for me to mail out my broken phone.\n\nNow this took them about a month and a half, during which I went back to the store to make sure everything was ok.  They explained that sometimes these things get backed up, but not to worry.  I wanted patiently, and the package did come, along with everything needed.\n\nI mailed my broken phone out immediately. \n\nSo yesterday (over a month since I had mailed my phone back, and a few days short of 3 months since I initially reported the problem) I finally received my phone back, however no repairs were made.  Apparently since the warranty expired during the time I was waiting for the company to receive the phone, it was deemed OOW (out of warranty)\n\nI was furious, and immediately called their customer service line. The guy who I spoke with (who himself was very helpful) checked out my account information and verified my story, he then went to talk to his supervisor.  Turns out there is nothing that can be done, that's their policy.  The operator sided with me completely, and basically told me that he thought this was bullshit, he credited my account $50 for the trouble, and filed a detailed complaint with another department... which is supposed to call me in the next few days.\n\nNow the operator who I spoke to seemed confident that along with his detailed letter, this matter should be resolved with the next phone call.  Unfortunately I do not share his confidence.  Does anyone have any advice for me, regarding how I should handle the next phone call???\n\nThus far I have been very calm and understanding, yet firm.", "summary": "Virgin Mobile refuses to honor a product warranty because it expired while the product was being shipped for repairs.  Do What?"}
{"id": "t3_erf5g", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My girlfriend has had a lot of family members passing away lately and I don't know how to comfort her anymore.", "post": "In the past 5 months she has been to three funerals. She's only 18 and eventhough she's a really strong person, it's too much for her to handle. We keep a long distance relationship so I can't go to her and comfort her in person, only via MSN for now.\n\nJust 30 minutes ago her grandmother passed, she doesn't know what to do with herself and she guilts herself for what happened. She got 20.000 DKK (danish currency) as a christmas present from her grandmother in the mail minutes after she had found out her grandmother passed. She guilts herself with the fact that when she visited her grandma yesterday, she said \"Good night, I will see you tomorrow\" but never did.\n\nI'm running out of words to tell her, Reddit; help me please.", "summary": "Long distance relationship girlfriend has had a lot of family members taken away from her, don't know what to tell her anymore that will make her feel better."}
{"id": "t3_qmvpp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What was your most stubborn moment?", "post": "It could have been for a good or bad reason, but we have all been stubborn at times. And sometimes it gets out of hand, maybe with parents or an SO, to the point where it's just stupid and you perhaps look like a complete asshole.\n\nMy most stubborn moment came at a celebration for a friend's birthday party in high school. We had a few people get together (I think about 8 or 10) and after just hanging around for a bit we all decide to catch a movie as a group. We hadn't decided which movie to see so we discussed it when we arrived. Since we were leaning towards comedy, it came down to two choices: Most people wanted to watch Shark Tale, but I was adamant about Shaun of the Dead. People caught in the middle sided with the birthday girl, who wanted to watch Shark Tale, which left me as the only one fighting for SotD. None of us had seen either movie before at the time, but I swore on my life that SotD would be better. It escalated and I made a ***huge*** fuss and had to be taken aside and calmed down before *very* reluctantly agreeing to side with the hive-mind. I was ready to start walking home or even wait outside while everyone else watched Shark Tale. We were each paying for our own tickets so paying for a movie I did not want to see and thought would be terrible definitely played a factor. After the movie people started to latch on to the idea that I may have been correct in my assertion, and I basically sulked and kept my mouth shut for the rest of the night. Needless to say after everyone saw SotD on their own time I was more or less vindicated for my actions. Despite my stubborn outburst I didn't lose any friends, including the birthday girl, who is actually one of my best friends to this day and is also a fellow redditor. We have laughed about this since, despite me carrying some major guilt for acting the way I did.", "summary": "Group of friends wanted to see Shark Tale over Shaun of Dead, I fought stubbornly for SotD and made a complete ass of myself in the meantime."}
{"id": "t3_2vdzqb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 F] have been dating my boyfriend [23 M] for 2 years, seeking married people's advice about doubts?", "post": "I'm looking for advice from married folks, or people in long-term relationships. \n\nNow, I don't want any answers saying things like \"when you know, you know\". I'm a logical thinker, and I overthink everything, and I need concrete examples. Please and thank you. \n\nI love him, but we fight a lot. Mostly because I'm really combative and he calls me on my shit (which I appreciate!). We have similar personalities, temperaments, we can make each other laugh, enjoy similar activities, I can be with him for days and days and not get sick of him, we have a great sex life, and I think we're a good couple. \n\nI get hung up on silly things, though, like we don't share a taste in music and often don't think the same things are funny. Additionally, I'm atheist, and he has some sort of apathetic ambiguous faith. His lack of concern about it bothers me, considering religion is something I think about a lot. We've talked about it, and he doesn't intend on making it a part of our life or our potential children's lives... but I wonder if maybe I'd be better suited with someone I could have long talks about raging atheism with. \n\nI can be really critical of him, and I know I shouldn't be, but I love him and think I can see a long future with him, but I'm just wondering... are these feelings of doubt and questioning normal? Are there people who are married and happy that had similar concerns about the person they're with?", "summary": "I'm crazy critical and have concerns about the person I'm with being the person I always want to be with. Are there other married and happy people who had the same concern about their spouse?"}
{"id": "t3_27jsth", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My girlfriend [24/f] just got offered a great job in Seattle. We live in New York currently. I [26/m] don't know what to do.", "post": "**The Basics**\n\nMy girlfriend was just offered a job at one of the major tech firms in Seattle with a salary of $110,000+ bonuses. It's kind of a dream job for her and a significant bump in salary. \n\nWe currently live in New York. Still in separate apartments (which I think is a key thing to mention here). We've dated for about a year. I've known her for even longer.\n\n**The Problem**\n\nI don't know if I want to move to Seattle. I feel like the decision was just thrown on me last night. And the challenge is - making this decision makes me think - am I going to marry this girl? Am I going to stay with her forever? Is she worth completely committing to?\n\nIt's not even the move that intimidates me. Seattle would be great. I'd love to do that. It's the commitment. It's the conversation of \"Of course I'll move with you cross country, drop my job and leave my friends.\" - I don't know if she's someone I should be with forever. To put it simply, I don't think I'm in love with her. I don't really know what that means, but I just know that I may want to date other people before I settle down.\n\nSo this opens the pandora's box of relationship issues. I started dating her casually, and it slowly evolved to be more serious, but in terms of marriage/settling down I've always been explicit that I didn't want to do anything of the sort until my early 30's. This moving conversation opens up that discussion again.\n\nWe just had the conversation last night. She just left my apartment this morning and it's running around my mind.\n\n**The Question**\n\nWhat do you recommend I do? What questions do I ask? \n\nI don't think a long distance relationship is realistic.\n\n**The", "summary": "Girlfriend moving across country. I have a fear of moving in and moving across country specifically with her. Makes me think she may not be the one. Brain is racing. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_1950dh", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Hi reddit.  Would you use this instead of making images of web text?", "post": "So I do most of my browsing on reddit through my phone.  For the most part it is great although it often takes quite a bit of time to load images.  This is where I came up with an idea for a content sharing service.\n  \nSo take [something like this] which is about 150KB.  This isn't that big of a picture but it could still take some time to load if the network is congested.  I take the same amount of content and added it [here]  This came out to ~7.5KB.  This should be able to load just about instantly on a phone.  This is a fairly small example as I have seen some images that span multiple pages and take forever to load on my phone.\n  \nSo the benefits of the service are\n  \n* Must faster load times on mobile devices.\n* The pages are rendered in a mobile/tablet friendly layout.\n* I keep the original styling\n* I link to the original source\n* Sites with low bandwidth wouldn't feel the pain of the reddit effect\n  \n  \nAnyway, let me know what you think.  Also if anyone has a better idea for a name of the site let me know.\n  \nIf reddit likes this idea I will keep developing.  I know that right now it is pretty slow when you actually select some content and doesn't work on all sites.  This was just a prototype and I have a ton of ideas on how to speed up the site.  I will also give the UI/UX a refresh by getting some help from a graphic artist.", "summary": "Instead of  [this image] the service will share [this text] -- ~150KB vs ~7.5KB"}
{"id": "t3_2w0q4z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18 M] girlfriend [18 F] of over one year doesn't think it would be a good idea to continue to date after this summer", "post": "Last night on our valentines date, we got to talking about our futures and what we wanted.\n\n I expressed to her that I'd enjoy having each other as someone to confide in about our stresses in college next year (we're planning on going to schools roughly two hours away from each other). She responded by saying that college is a time that she expects we'll want to and will grow as individuals and didn't really express that she wanted to continue dating once we go off to college. She doesn't want to make me feel like I have to stay with her and follow her to the school she's going to, which we both want to major in the same thing and I keep telling her that I wished I'd applied to the same school she had because it's closer to home.\n\n I really like her (yes I know it's the whole high school sweetheart thing) and we get along together really well, but occasionally she gets depressed and shuts me out, although she has gotten less sad the longer we've dated and shares more than she previously did.", "summary": "Girlfriend doesn't think we should date each other in college, am I wrong for wanting/ believing we would work out in college?"}
{"id": "t3_z4hql", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Given the chance, what would you learn on company time to open better job options?", "post": "*Throwaway, because my job is unnecessary and I work for a large corporation.*\n\nDearest AskReddit,\n\nI'm in a predicament, and I'd like your thoughts.\n\nI currently work a job where I can pretty much do anything I want and still get payed. I'm an hourly employee that works in the middle of nowhere with no direct supervision. The job pays $10/hr, but there are no pay raises, no benefits, no insurance, and no room for advancement. \"They\" do not care what I do as long as I don't leave, essentially I'm payed for my presence.\n\nThe job is boring as fuck. I've been using my time surfing reddit and playing games, but I quickly found out that having the same routine at home *and* work leads to a very repetitive work week. I want to quit and move on, but since I have no higher education I would end up doing more work for less pay anywhere else locally. Looking at the bright side however, I can essentially get payed to better my education, I just need something to learn that will open better job opportunities.\n\nThe only problem is, I don't know what exactly what that something is. So far I've considered learning a second language (but I don't know what would be useful) and attending one of those online universities (but I'd still need to figure out what I'd want to study).\n\nSo, I'm looking for idea's. Given the same opportunity, what would you try to learn?", "summary": "company is paying me to do nothing, looking for ideas / suggestions for things to learn on company time so I can get out of this shit hole and move on."}
{"id": "t3_120vtw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My girlfriend is the nicest person, but she can be super trashy, help!", "post": "My girlfriend, who I've been with for a quite awhile, has always been I guess a little \"trashy\".  I always tried to chalk it up to \"fun-loving\" but recently I'm having a big problem with it.  She's the nicest girl, and she's really affectionate, but she likes to drink until she pukes, got a meaningless tattoo that ruined her back, has a tongue and belly ring because her sister said no to nipple rings (real happy about that), and really likes to wear skimpy, revealing clothes.  Even if the rest of her roommates are all going out in jeans, she'll put on a skirt that barely covers her ass.  Is there a way to explain this to her without really hurting her? Or am I better off finding someone more my type?", "summary": "My girlfriend's a really nice affectionate person, but she's got some habits that I think are trashy and I'm really put off by them. Do I try to talk to her or do I move on?"}
{"id": "t3_2k2cgk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need advice. Is it me? I feel like there's ALWAYS something wrong with my [20F] boyfriend[23m] and I.", "post": "I love him. I know I do, he's amazing, and I can't get enough of him.\nBut I feel like there's always SOMETHING I'm unhappy about.\n\n1. I feel like he just doesn't want to have sex that much anymore. When we hang out, at some point I'll start kissing his neck, touching him, etc. But he's never into it, ever. He'll only start fooling around once I complain. He loves me, he loves cuddling and kissing, but he's simply not as active as me, and whenever we do have sex, he cums first and leaves me hangin.\n\n2. he's never romantic, never does cutesy things, all he ever wants to do is sit in his room. Which is nice, we cuddle and stuff, but I like going out and doing things. He never wants to do anything. \n\n3. If I don't drive to see him, I don't see him.He doesn't have a car, which sucks, since he lives around 30 minutes from me, which isn't too far, but I have to be the one to go out and see him, which is a pain sometimes. I haven't seen him in two weeks because I haven't been able to go out to see him, and he won't do anything to try.\n\nI've been patient with him, he didn't have a job for a few months, I've paid for everything, drove us everywhere, anything i wanted to do i had to drive, pay, etc. I just feel like I'm doing EVERYTHING in this relationship.\nI'm stressed, and extremely unhappy.\n\nBUT.\n\nWhen I see him I get so happy, I love him so much, I know I do. But I'm just so unhappy with the relationship. HELP! I don't know what to do. I try to bring it up, but then he gets upset and tells me I \"Hurt his feelings\" and that he's going through hard times. I'm very patient, I've been with him through his hard times, but I'm getting tired.", "summary": "I'm extremely unhappy, Boyfriend never satisfies sexually, I'm the one doing everything In the relationship, I'm getting tired. But I love him too much to leave."}
{"id": "t3_353rh0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by failing to hang up.", "post": "Today I called my great aunt to thank her for my wedding gift. I was calling from my cell phone through my Bluetooth in my car. The answering machine picked up. I didn't say much, because I wanted to thank her when I got talk to her. I hung up the phone through my steering wheel and music began to play through my speakers again. It was the red hot chili peppers. Being alone in my car, I began to make sounds to the melody of the song. It was something I'd never do in front of anyone else. I looked down at my phone to reddit at the red light and saw my google dialer still connected... Might have yelled fuck when I realized what I had done before actually hanging up.", "summary": "called great aunt, hang up failed through cars button, sang odd sounds to the melody of red hot chili peppers onto her voicemail. "}
{"id": "t3_2utksg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my bestfriend [16 F] who has a boyfriend and I have a crush on her.", "post": "Recently I have redeveloped a crush on my best friend who already has a boyfriend the she loves. I have asked about my chance of ever dating her and she says never. That our friendship means too much and that she loves her boyfriend to much to ever break up with him. She has also told me to get over it and even is trying to set me up with her cousin who I liked in the past. So she is no help even though she has seid she would be dating if her and her bf never meet. \n\nThen I talked to my therapist about my issues with her and it was a helpful conversation but it left me with a delmia. She told me that I am letting her live the best of both worlds with pretty much having two boyfriends. Me who she spends more time with her then her bf and is willing to give her anything in the world along with just wanting to make her happy and take care of her problems. But she doesn't see that most of the time and she treats me like her gay friend sometimes. So my therapist told me that I need to give her the ultimatum where she cant have us both and if she doesn't want to be with me the same way I want to be with her I should cut her off.\n\nSo now my issue is that I really don't want to do that but I'm miserable having to suffer with her telling me about how she fucks her bf and how she loves him but not me. At the same time she helps me out because we do have a ton of fun and she helps me out with some other problems that I have. Along with that she is very understanding and probably knows me the best out of anyone in the world. So I have a major issue to deal with somehow.", "summary": "I have a crush on my best friend and she doesn't want to date so now I have a choice to leave her alone or ruin her relationship with her current bf."}
{"id": "t3_1k7gq0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend [17m] of 2 years won't take me [17f] to homecoming", "post": "I brought up wanting to go to homecoming with my boyfriend and he said he refused to go and would not tell me why. The thing is I don't even want to go to the actual dance I just wanted to get dressed up and go out to eat and stuff, just the two of us, so its not really a matter of him not wanting to go to the dance or be around people. When I said I still wanted to go with some girlfriends he got upset. I've tried bringing it up again but he gets upset and refuses to speak about or tell me why he doesn't want to go. He knows I don't actually want to go to the dance and that we would not be going with a group like we did the year before. I am just upset that all my friends will get to dress up and have fun and I'll be stuck at home because my boyfriend refuses to take me. I know it's only homecoming and he says he'll go to prom with me but I am starting to doubt that. What do I do?", "summary": "Boyfriend won't take me to homecoming and won't tell me why, gets upset when I talk about going with friends"}
{"id": "t3_gz46e", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "my girlfriend wants me to move from  ohio to california", "post": "heres the catch. we are both working on associate degrees at a community college. her major is photography and i don't have a major established yet. she believes that by moving to california after she earns her degree will put her at better odds to get a job in photography. we are still two years away from earning our associates but she wants me to decide right now if i want to move with her or not. we have been dating for almost 8 month and apparently not wanting to move to cali due to my uneasy feelings about leaving my life is a deal breaker for our relationship. she is so certain that her life will take her to california that she wont allow for the possibility of ending up somewhere else. what should i do? i really love her but what about my life..", "summary": "girlfriend wants me to move to cali with her in years time and wants to break up with me now if i tell her im not sure if i could."}
{"id": "t3_3k48zk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26F] GF, just admitted to me [27M] that she's self conscious about her weight/body. How should I go about trying to encourage her to get back into shape?", "post": "I've been dating my current GF for about 4 months now. Every since we've been together, everything has been fine. I've been perfectly happy with the way she looks, and everything about her. She's kind of conservative so we've just got to third base, but she just admitted to me that she hates for me to see her naked because she's gained a lot of weight in the last few months and she's uncomfortable with the way her body looks.\n\nI want her to get back into shape, and for her to be happy with herself and the way she looks. How should I go about doing that?\n\nI'm going to help her workout by going with her, but I'm only available to see her 2, maybe 3 days out of the week due to our schedules. Right now she has an ancient phone and keeps on talking about how she wants to get a iPhone, and she always wants to go to visit different cities. I was thinking about encouraging her by having her losing an X amount of pounds, and I'd get her either a new phone or take her on a vacation.\n\nAre there any negatives by doing this? I want to keep her motivated since I'm always working. \n\nAny additional tips or suggestions would be appreciated.\n\nThank you!", "summary": "Girlfriend admitted she's self conscious about her body, I want to help her stay in shape but work a lot, was thinking about encouraging her by helping her upgrade her ancient phone that she hates or taking her on a vacation."}
{"id": "t3_2fu97d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 F], my bf [25 M] should I talk to him about this?", "post": "Alright, so in the past month he's been secretive about his facebook. He goes on it quite often when we're not together, but when I'm at his place he doesn't go on it. He would get on it before regardless of me being with him or not, but recently he just stopped. A couple of weeks ago, he tried to go on his phone with it turned away from me. I caught a glimpse and he was trying to get into his messages. but now you have to download the messenger to message people on mobile. This is after he just stopped. It's freaking me out, and I don't know if I should be worried? I don't know why he would have to feel like he needs to hide it from me. I go on my facebook and check my messages and he can see who I'm talking to. I asked him last week why he doesn't get on facebook when we're together and he said he just hardly gets on anymore. I believed him until I downloaded the messenger for my phone to message him something silly before I took a nap. (I just got back home from my morning class and I didn't want to turn my computer on.)  It said he was active 3 minutes ago. This is why I'm so confused and I think I should talk to him. but I don't want him to think I don't trust him. It's how he's acting about facebook in general that is freaking me out. He's secretive about it, he lied to me about how he barely gets on it when he clearly checks his facebook a lot. I don't know how to talk to him about this, since I already brought this up before. I'm getting anxious about this whole thing.... I'm afraid if I bring it up it will start an arguement. I just don't know how to deal with this. What should I do?", "summary": "Boyfriend is being secretive, kinda sketchy about facebook. I dont' know if or how I should talk to him about this."}
{"id": "t3_pt3uk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm thinking of proposing to my boyfriend.", "post": "I have a problem that I have been conflicted with over the last few days. My boyfriend and I have been dating for several years now and I have never been more in love with him. Everyone expects us to have gotten married, but I have resisted the pressure at every turn. I have never really understood appeal of marriage. Marriage has always seemed like red tape and paperwork that doesn't add anything to the emotions involved in a long term relationship. I do, however, think that it is important to my boyfriend. I also think that I have probably caused him to think that marriage is not something I am interested in at all. Lately I have found the idea of marriage a bit more pleasing, though I am not sure where it has come from. \n\nHe has been an amazing partner, through everything, and I have decided I would be delighted to give him the gift of that promise. I also believe that men should have a change to have a moment of pure romance, like all woman dream of having. He is more of a romantic than me, but I do my best. I guess, after that bit of background, I want to ask if people have an opinion on whether or not a female to male proposal would embarrass rather than romanticize. I also have no idea what you would give a man as a token of your pleas of marriage.", "summary": "Is an unconventional proposal going to land me in the dog house? If not, do I come baring a ring?"}
{"id": "t3_23la45", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Would it be inappropriate for me [22M] to ask my professor [~35F] to lunch?", "post": "Before anything else: **platonically**. I am absolutely not interested in dating any of my professors. I'm gay, and she's married.\n\nI've had a couple of classes with this one professor, and although she's not officially my advisor, that's been the role she's played for the last year: helping me figure out career paths, applications for grad schools, and how to balance school and personal responsibilities. She's supervising an independent study I'm doing this semester, and after we've gone over the work for this week, we'll usually spend some time talking about other things - classes, travel, family, food, etc. I really enjoy talking to her and once all grades are in for the semester, I wondered if if would be appropriate to ask her to have lunch just to be social. I've had dinner with my professors before, but it's always been in the context of traveling and I feel like it might be seen as suspect since it wouldn't be part of a group of people. I'm graduating, so there's no chance of having another class with her.", "summary": "I have a mentor/friend-type relationship with a professor, would it be inappropriate to socialize off-campus once the semester is over?"}
{"id": "t3_260dmq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I don't know what to do with constant back and forth friendship and frequent disappearances. Me (18M) and her (18F)", "post": "About a year ago I had a fling with a girl. It was odd, she dumped her boyfriend for me, we tried things out, but they got weird. I felt bad that she had just dumped her boyfriend, so I broke things off and we remained friends. She got back together with her ex not long after that and we didn't talk for a long time. He hates me and refused to allow her to talk to me. They broke up in the fall and we started talking and hanging out, but it seems like I'm her last resort friend. We barely talk, and the few times we hang out can be really cool, but they don't happen often at all. She just started hanging out with her ex again (like last week) and we don't talk anymore. I feel like I'm only there when she's either not with her boyfriend or bored and there's nobody else to talk to. We went on a date 2 weeks ago, and she spent a good hour and a half on her phone with other people, then went home and we haven't talked since. Sometimes weeks or months will go by before we talk and it bugs the shit out of me. It seems like we'll be fine for a week or two, talking every day and such, then she drops off the face of the Earth, then comes back for a week or two, then does the same thing. What do I do?", "summary": "I feel like I'm a last resort with a friend. We don't talk for weeks at a time because of her ex and I'm sick of the back and forth stuff."}
{"id": "t3_29kzgq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my GF [26 F] of 2 yrs, will the relationship anxiety ever end?", "post": "I constantly waffle over whether or not to break up with my girlfriend.  One minute I'll feel like it's definitely over and start planning the breakup speech, then I'll break down crying thinking about it, and afterwards I just can't understand how I felt so upset.  There's nothing really wrong with our relationship, I love her and she's my best friend - just this uneasy feeling that she's not the one, and I would be more compatible with someone else.  I'm not sure if there's any point in getting into specifics, but I'm a more of a type A and she's definitely not, and sometimes I find myself being pretty critical of the way she lives her life.  The real problem is, I'm about to start a PhD (in August) and we're planning on moving across the country together.  So I really have to figure stuff out NOW, or else I'm going to completely ruin her life.  \n\nI know there's the whole \"grass is always greener\" thing, but clearly people often date people who turn out to not be their best match.  I never dated very much (she's my second relationship), and so I don't have a good idea of what's out there or how rare me and my GFs connection is.  The problem is, the only way to really know...would be to end it.\n\nI just want to know - will these feelings of doubt ever go away?  I'm a wreck and I can't imagine living my whole life this way.  Has anyone gone through something like this and come out of the other side alright?", "summary": "If you're really doubting things, is it possible to work through it?  Or am I doomed to feel this way until we eventually break up?"}
{"id": "t3_557382", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How frequent should I text her? Or shouldn't I text her at all?", "post": "Some backstory\nI met an exchange student [22F], from Finland, which I have been an exchange to in the last semester. We met at a psych class and on Monday I asked for her number and dated that evening. The first date (at least in my assumption) was smooth. We walked around the campus and have some street food afterwords. I am planning to go for second date this weekend but she declined it because she wants to tour Borneo island throughout this weekend. But she is looking forward for a second date, next weekend.\n\n-end of backstory-\n\nWhich comes to my question - ah the waiting is so painful! Waiting for another week is pretty much puzzling. So I decided to keep the connection going. I texted her at least one thread a day. But I do realise that being too much pushy will make her intimidated. I mean she should have her own moment in exploring Borneo. But on the other side, I want to keep the conversation going.\n\nShould I just wait for her to come here on next Tuesday, meet her afterwords and proceed for a second date?\n\n-or-\n\nShould I keep the ball rolling by at least say \"How was your vacation so far?\" through text while anticipating her to be back to campus on Tuesday?", "summary": "Second date is on the next weekend and I wouldn't see her around at least until next Tuesday. Should I text her to keep the connection going or just activate my self-control mechanism and just wait for her to return?"}
{"id": "t3_362cp8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my [24F] of 6 months, she left me because her ex boyfriends dad died.", "post": "My ex was close to her ex boyfriends dad who recently passed from cancer. She's lost alot of people close to her before and this makes me feel terrible for her. She told me that she couldn't be in a relationship anymore because she didn't want to \"drag me into it\". This was terrible news for me because we were going great before this happened and I really wanted to help her through it. I really want to be there for her still because I know she's going through a tough time but the thing is is that she never wants to talk about it, she deals with it by making herself so busy with her work that she just forgets about it all. I just need some advice on how to be there for her in my current situation, because I have never personally gone through losing anyone major in my life. I don't want to sound selfish either and tell her about how shitty I feel about losing her because I know she is going through a lot worse.", "summary": "Ex had someone close to her die which she then didn't want to drag me into, I want to know how to still be there for her."}
{"id": "t3_3317lc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28/M] about to sleep with [27F] but feel guilty about it and feel like I'm taking advantage of her", "post": "So I dated this really beautiful girl last fall for about a month or so, things didn't really work out due to timing and she moved back home to take care of her sick mother. Recently, about two months ago, we started chatting again and it got sexual...starting sexting and exchanging photos, with making plans for her to come up and visit me and have sex (we did not have sex when dating, though we did other things of that nature, just not intercourse). \n\nWell, I saw her briefly when she was in town a week ago for work and it really hit me that she is in a very vulnerable place right now due to her mom's situation. And that maybe having sex with her wouldn't be the best idea or would be taking advantage of her. I'm worried she may have reconnected and started this sexual stuff with me because she isn't doing well at the moment and this was a way of coping. It was clear to me when we met up that she is pretty vulnerable and not just the kind of person to have sex for the fun of it. The thing is, I may be moving in a few months, so if she does come back to the city we couldn't be together in a serious way and I don't want to sleep with her when she is vulnerable like this, then not be there for her in the long-term. I'd feel like a dick because she is the sweetest girl. I just feel bad for carrying this on for two months now and don't know how to deal with the situation. Do you think it would be wrong for me to sleep with her when she is like this? If so, how can I break that to her? I just really think she may regret it in the long run though she is saying she wants it right now.", "summary": "Recently started chatting and sexting a girl I saw before, have plans for meeting up and having sex but feel guilty now as I realize she is in a really vulnerable place - thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_drgm5", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Can anybody hopefully provide some insight?...seeking employment out of state.", "post": "I've been unemployed since the end of April and have been seeking and applying for jobs non-stop since then.  I have not been able to land an interview with anybody let alone get any responses; they're a *we're sorry...* when I do get one.\nI'm just trying to figure out how I fit among the rest of the job seekers out there.  I'm a civil/structural engineer with ~2 years experience and wanting to relocate to another state.  I haven't been able to find many opportunities at my experience level in my state and haven't been successful with getting any responses from cold inquiries to local companies.\nWhen I do find a job posting that I feel I match well that's out of state and I *do* get a negative response, I can't help but feel that the leading factor is because I'm across the country.  Can anybody provide any insight on that?", "summary": "Am I at a disadvantage when I apply to jobs (even ones that I qualify well) when I am located out of state?  (located in the midwest, wanting to relocate to west coast)"}
{"id": "t3_1s6v1d", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Got an offer! But 2 other companies are also in the mix...", "post": "Hey guys. I have used this thread to search up interview tips and it has payed off! I have received a verbal offer from the hiring manager at firm A.\n\nThe problem is, I have also interviewed with 2 other competing firms and that process has went quite well so far. I've been through 2 telephone interviews and an in person interview at firm B, and 2 in person interviews and a telephone interview with firm C.\n\nNow that I have an offer from firm A, I'm very curious to here back from B and C. I'm unsure as to how to approach this, because I don't want to keep firm A waiting too long. Each firm has their respective qualities that I really like, and if an offer was presented by all of them it would definitely be a very tough choice for me. Is there any way to speed up this process as far as finding out if a decision has been made by either firm B or C?", "summary": "Firm A offers, I like firm B and C and am waiting to here back from them about furthering the process and potentially getting offers from them as well. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_38xg9w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend (18f) is not happy with me (23m). Any support or advice would be appreciated.", "post": "Okay so let me start with some backstory. We met last June and hit it off immediately. We took things very slow for a few months but by November I decided that I wanted to make it official. \n\nEverything was great and we hung out nearly any chance we could. She's helped me quit smoking and always is there to motivate me. We would have occasional little arguments over minuscule things but never like last night.\n\nAs of lately I've began to create bigger issues out of the small things. I know that I can be jealous and rude sometimes but she isn't going to put up with that forever. I want to be better and I know I can be. I've been really emotional about the thought of losing her especially when I know it's something that is all my fault. I can't change the past but I really want her to see that I am still the guy she met in June. \n\nI just need some input from others. I didn't know where to turn and I've never done this before but I hope someone out there can help me.", "summary": "My girlfriend is considering us breaking up if I continue to be rude/jealous. I wasn't like this in the beginning and I don't want to lose her because I'm stuck in some sort of negative state of mind."}
{"id": "t3_3w0owr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23/F] asked out co-worker [27/M] and he said no, now what?", "post": "This actually happened about a month ago, and now that I'm past the disappointment, anger and sadness I thought that everything would be normal again. I no longer have any desire to be with him or date him but because I see him quite often I don't think I've gotten that chance to get over him, so I still like him. \n\nEven though it's not awkward between us, it's made being around him quite difficult, not to the point where my work is being compromised or anything along those lines, just on a more personal level. He'll be around for the next couple of days and this is causing me to be on edge, which is generally how I feel when I'm around him. That plus vulnerable, small and self-conscious. \n\nI know rejection sucks and it's meant to sting. For me, this was the first time I took it upon myself to actually ask someone out. Unfortunately I have to face the reminder of my rejection often, so if anyone has any tips on how I can get to a better place with this or at least not feel so on-edge/vulnerable/small/self-conscious about it, I'd love to hear it.\n\nA little BG information: I'm currently doing an internship for school in a small town and have tried occupying my mind with other guys with no success (it's a REALLY small town). Dating isn't in the foreseeable future right now.\nBeing a student, I also made sure this was okay prior to asking him out so do so as to not get the \"inappropriate behaviour\" speech.", "summary": "With a lack of other distractions/other potentials and constantly having to see him now do I squash the feelings of anxiety and vulnerability with someone who rejected me, and who I still kind of have a crush because he's always around."}
{"id": "t3_3l3k7i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My wife [26 F] and I [25 M] are on uneven terms right now, and she wants to seriously discuss getting a divorce.", "post": "I've never spoken about the intimate details of my relationship with anyone before, let alone online. My apologies in advance if I'm difficult to make sense of.\n\nMy wife and I have been together since I was in high school. Our relationship has never really been easy. Keeping an **extremely** long story short we now have two kids (two and three years old) and have just moved to a new city. Also worth noting, we have both suffered from depression and anxiety for many years, coupled with low self-esteem. My wife had post-partum depression after my eldest was born as well.\n\nPart of the reason we moved was to get away from negative influences where we were living, and to help repair our struggling relationship. So far our relationship has remained stagnant, discussing divorce is coming up more frequently. Usually this is spurred on by me reacting poorly to a situation.\n\nI'm not even sure how I feel about a divorce at this point. I've thought about it a lot over the last few years. I can see myself being a lot happier after a divorce, but I can also see my self becoming a depressed bag of shit. I'm not sure what the best course of action would be at this time.\n\nI'm really worried about my kids too. I love them both so much, and don't want them to get hurt during all of this. It's breaking my heart thinking about what this would do to them.", "summary": "Is divorce the right option for me? I feel I might be happier after a divorce, but I'm thinking working to keep our relationship going may be a better alternative."}
{"id": "t3_1ybaud", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Asking for a discount because of poor service from a small business?", "post": "I ordered a christmas gift for my friend over two months ago. I contacted the seller via e-mail and didn't hear from them for over a week. I then hunted down their Facebook Page and direct messaged them there. They told me their screen printer had been closed for the holidays and my package would be sent out \"soon.\"\n\nAgain I waited over two weeks with no package. I direct messaged them again and they replied back saying that one of the totes full of packages had been left behind at the office and he would straighten it out on that coming tuesday. Two weeks again go by and I message him again. He states that my package had been sent out (coincidentally that same day, probably before replying to my message). I waited another two weeks and FINALLY the package arrived today.\n\nMy friend says I should definitely ask for a partial refund or discount because of the time it took to get the package. I missed christmas AND valentine's day as opportunities to give this gift, which really sucked. I am totally satisfied with the product and am willing to do business again, but apparently I'm not the only one this happened to.\n\nAm I in the right for asking for a discount/coupon/refund?", "summary": "Waited over two months for an order to be processed and arrive. Got the run around from the business. Finally got package. Should I ask for a discount?"}
{"id": "t3_2t6l8p", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not changing the name on my personal hotspot and getting my school evacuated", "post": "So a little background first: I'm on my school's student council, and today was our Junior Prom assembly. We had a lot going on, much of it relying on a fast internet connection to work (live cameras streamed over AppleTV, etc.) we realized that as everyone settled into the auditorium, we'd have a large portion of the student body connecting to the school wifi, and we were worried about slowdown. Our live camera was basically useless without a good internet connection, so I had the bright idea to hook up the AppleTV to my personal hotspot. It connected automatically, I ran the feed for a few seconds, worked like a charm, so we moved on. Assembly starts, about 15 minutes in and everything is going great. I'm backstage when I see our principal run up to microphone and tell everyone to exit the school immediately, as there is a potential terror threat in the area (I live in an area where things like this never happen; we've had one lockdown in my 10 years of schooling here) obviously, everyone's more than a little worried. Everyone files out, myself included. As I'm standing outside, a friend walks up and tells us what he found out from a teacher. One of the students, while trying to connect to the wifi, had \"discovered\" a network... My network: \"Taliban Secure Communications.\" needless to say, the student went to a teacher, things escalated, and the school ordered a full evacuation. I talked to the principal (a very, very awkward conversation) and got everything sorted out. Everyone's parents are panicking, checking their kids out of school now. My personal hotspot is now called \"I love school.\"", "summary": "Turned on personal hotspot with the name \"Taliban Secure Communications\" for an assembly, school got evacuated because of a supposed terror threat."}
{"id": "t3_37q7yk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my friend [27F], who is planning on bringing her two pythons to our office building for two weeks without notifying anyone.", "post": "My friend (27F) is having bedbugs removed from her apartment tomorrow and she is worried about the chemicals being dangerous for her two pet reticulated pythons. Since she lives close by to our work, she is getting some of our friends to help carry the two cages to her office there. She is planning on moving in two weeks, so she would keep the pythons in her office for the two weeks. \n\nI tried telling her the chemicals are really concentrated on the sprayed surfaces and keeping the cages on her balcony for a few hours would more than suffice. I think she thinks that I am unconcerned about her snakes' welfare, which is untrue, and so she is not listening to me. We work in an building (university building) with over 200 people, and she does not want to notify anyone or get approval. I am not helping carry the cages because I do not want to get involved in this. I can tell she is irritated with me. What do I do? I feel like I need to convince her otherwise because she can get into a lot of trouble, and more importantly, if a python were to escape (unlikely, but not impossible) someone can get seriously hurt. What do I do?", "summary": "My friend is planning on keeping her two pet pythons in her office at our work (in a building with 200 people) for two weeks, without telling anyone, and I don't know how to talk her out of it."}
{"id": "t3_wt8lp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Recently we got a new flatmate who is turning out to be an absolute nightmare. What horrible flatmate stories do you have?", "post": "A little background info: A few months ago, my flatmate and I were forced to rent out our spare room to keep costs down. My flatmate put an ad out and this guy replied and moved in while I was out of town. He was a bit older than us (he's 35 and we are 22) but he seemed ok. He needed a place quickly because he had just broken up with his partner. He was pretty depressed for a while and started acting pretty weird. His ex saw us all out at the pub one night and followed us home. My flatmate and I started getting abusive texts from her telling us to stay away from him or she would hurt us. She stalked us to the point where he had to take a restraining order against her and her sons. Drama followed this guy like a bad smell and he loved all the attention it brought him. He's a pathological liar and has lied about everything from being left at the alter, having cancer and to owning a gay cruising club. Unfortunately we can't kick him out of the flat as he is now on the lease and we can't afford to make rent payments with just the two of us.", "summary": "got a random flatmate from the internet. turned out to be a nutter and got stalked by his crazy ex."}
{"id": "t3_2vq35u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 F] boyfriend [22 M] of 2.5 years hasn't given me my Christmas gift. Should I care or just forget about it?", "post": "My boyfriend went away on a trip with his family during the holidays, so we didn't see each other during Christmas or New Year's. Knowing that, I made sure to give him a Christmas gift before he left, and I told him to open it on the 25th. He told me that he would give me my gift when he returns, so I was fine with that.\n\nWhen he came back, I proposed to him that we should cook a nice dinner together, a sort of small celebration since we were apart for the holidays. He said ok, but didn't seem to excited. Then we had a stupid fight and he told me he wasn't in the mood for it. So we never had that nice dinner, and he hasn't even given me my gift, even though he keeps telling me that he will, just that he hasn't had the time or right moment. \n\nI am not a materialistic person, and I wouldn't care if he didn't give me anything. It just bothers me that he keeps saying that he will give it to me, but it's been a month and a half. Should I just forget about it or is it okay if I feel a little unappreciated? I don't want to make a big deal out of this, so I'd really appreciate your comments :)", "summary": "Is it okay to feel bad that my boyfriend hasn't given me my Christmas gift, even though he said he will?"}
{"id": "t3_49095j", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trusting my son with an Apple ID and my credit card", "post": "As usual, this FU did not occur today, but it did GO DOWN today in a big way.\n\nI bought my high school son an iPhone 6 plus 18 months ago. With that, I attached my credit card to his Apple ID, with the strict instructions that he must ask me before ever using the card. This he did... for 17 months. I think we all know where this is going...  \n\nToday I looked at my credit card bill, because it seemed a little high. Turns out it was over $1000US high. My son has gotten addicted to one of those stupid games, and spent over $1000US on \"in-game purchases\" in the last month. And what kills me is this: the main reason was so that he could, at various times, \"pop balloons faster\". I shit you not. I spent over $1000 so that my little cherub could \"pop virtual balloons way faster\" for 30 days. (The game is \"Bloons TD 5\", for the curious...)  \n\nThere should be a subreddit for parents who have discovered their precious little ones have sold them down the river electronically, to the tune of 4 figures, in order to \"pop virtual balloons faster\" or whatever. Said iPhone/iWatch has been confiscated and may indeed be sold, I haven't decided. Be on the lookout at an ebay near you for an iPhone/iWatch combo on sale by \"father_of_a_balloon_popping_addict\".  \n\nThere is good news in all of this. Apple Support was downright SAINTLY about the charges. I told them exactly what happened and just hoped for the best. Legally, they owed me nothing, but they reimbursed 98% of the charges anyway. A big shout out to \"Gina\" and \"Jennifer\", you guys REALLY made my TIFU less TIFU-y feeling!!!", "summary": "Son racked up over $1000US on my credit card on stupid in-game purchases on iPhone cuz I trusted him, and Apple was awesome and mostly refunded the money."}
{"id": "t3_mmm2q", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I am now unemployed and I don't know what to do.", "post": "Howdy Reddit,\n\nThis is my first post on Reddit ever, as I've been weary due to a lot of the rude people I've seen. However, I've decided to bite the bullet and post anyway, because I'd like some advice from an unbiased populace. So anyway...\n\nI've been learning web development for a while now, and I recently landed a salaried job at a local marketing agency. I was converting designs, and even doing a lot of Wordpress and custom PHP work. However, due to some issues with management, the company was shut down, leaving me unemployed. The problem lies within the fact that I was only at this company for four months. The town I live in does not have any other companies that deal in web development, so I'm kind of out of luck in getting another web gig. That is, unless I can find a job elsewhere. Of course, I do not believe my knowledge (outside of HTML/CSS) is good enough to land me another job elsewhere, let alone somehow move financially (I am 21 and do not have a bunch of savings). I would like to avoid going back to retail jobs if possible, but I will definitely work any job if need be. So I guess what I'm trying to say Reddit, is, for someone my age, in my position, with my experience, what would you suggest I do to continue moving up in the web industry, instead of falling out of it four months in?", "summary": "I'm an unemployed fairly smart 21 year old with web development experience trying to get back into the industry in a town with no opportunities and no resources to move elsewhere."}
{"id": "t3_3uqu80", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Why's everything a trade in this relationship? 27m and 26f", "post": "So we've been together for 10 years and over this time I wouldn't say things have gone stale but it feels like nothing is spontaneous any more. For instance, she will never initiate sex which I have voiced to her over the years and I get the same answer. Time goes on and nothing has changed, I've accepted that she just isn't going to (she says she's still sexually attracted and sex is great when it happens). But when it comes to things like doing activities or certain acts she always says \"well what do I get?\", so much so that it feels like I'm with a prostitute for lack of a better term. As if I'm paying either fiscally or with another act for something I desire. This has led me to initiate less and lose interest occasionally for resenting her statement. I would say I'm not sexually greedy, I will and do please her with all the things she likes whenever possible. \n\nI've also brought this up on occasion and it feels like it falls on deaf ears. I get a blank stare and a \"okay\". Still nothing changes or occasionally she'll feel bad about it and try to initiate but it feels like a pity act rather than a consensual one. \n\nI am always asking her what she would like to do for activities or even simple things such as where she would like to eat and I always get, \"I don't know\". And of course once I choose and we order or are at the place she says something along the lines of, \"I wish we went to xyz\"", "summary": "my girlfriend of 10 years is turning everything for sexual acts to dinning out into a negotiation, how do I fix it?"}
{"id": "t3_t96m2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I be mad about this?", "post": "My fiance (we've been together 3 years, getting married in November) has been working all day (this is common) and decided to go out for a drink after work (also very common). I'm concerned because last night we went out and on the way home got pulled over and I nearly got a DUI. This really freaked me out and I don't even want a sip of alcohol before driving ever again, yet he decides to go out for \"one beer\" (in quotes cause one beer for him really means 2 or 3)? On Cinco De Mayo nonetheless? Should I be angry about this? We're 27, female-male relationship.", "summary": "After I almost got a DUI last night (he was in the car), he decides to go out drinking. Should I be upset? And how do I approach the situation?"}
{"id": "t3_3e2n16", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by laughing at a homeless man's joke", "post": "Every day on my walk to work I always pass by several homeless people, very I often I don't give them change, but this morning I decided I was feeling nice.  I gave a homeless man near my office $4 and he offered to tell me a joke, so I politely accepted.  \n\nHe goes on to say \"Why don't black people like jokes?\" and then he waits and screams \"because they don't find them funny!\"  It wasn't a very funny joke, but I chuckled because I felt like it was the right thing to do.  Anyways, he must of thought that I thought he was hilarious, so he decided to follow me all the way to my office telling me incredibly racist jokes at quite an audible volume.  On the journey we walked past several coworkers who gave me some weird looks.", "summary": "Laughed at a homeless mans mildly racist joke and he followed me all the way to my office telling me extremely racist jokes"}
{"id": "t3_cqic3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I need reddit's advice with a girl that I've been  friends with for a long time", "post": "Well, where to start... I'm 20, I like this girl but we've been friends for 5+ years now, I never really had feelings for her before but I've started spending more time with her and found I had a lot more in common then I originally thought.\n\nI have been told by other friends (girls and guys) over and over again that I should ask her out, but I get the feeling that I will just get rejected as she may see me as in the dreaded friend zone.\n\nI want to know whether I should take the risk or go for a girl that I'm not really that interested in but I know that she likes me because she's always grabbing my hand.\n\nI will answer any questions that do not reveal my identity or anyone else's involved.", "summary": "I like a girl, I might be in friend zone, I know another girl likes me but I don't really have feelings for her, what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4w5lst", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26M] with my GF[25F] of 2 years, we're watching her sisters baby for 2 weeks. she wants to go to the movies but we can't get a baby sitter.", "post": "So we're watching my gf(steph) sisters baby(aoife, 8 months) for 5 days while her sister and husband go to some kind of medical conference for her job as head cardiologist for her hospital. they wanted to turn it into a little bit of a getaway for a day after. the watching the baby isn't the issue. we both come from large irish catholic families, taking care of babies is old hat for us.\n\nthe problem comes from that steph wanted to go see the new star trek movie. but we couldn't get a sitter so she just wanted to take aoife with us. as much as i wanted to see it as well to me, if you can't get a sitter you don't get to go to a movie. it's not fair to the baby who's gonna be subjected to loud sudden noises for 2 hours or the other moviegoers who have to listen to the crying of a baby for a movie they paid 12 bucks for.\n\ni tried to explain this to her, but all it did was start a fight. I'll be honest. I'm not innocent. we fought loudly and for a hour and change before we dropped it and stewed. how do i go about getting her to understand my position without giving up and dropping it altogether?", "summary": "GF wanted to go to a movie with a baby, i didn't because i think it isn't right of us. how to fix this without giving up altogether."}
{"id": "t3_3g9p2s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] texted a girl [15F] a few months ago, texted her again, she always randomly stops texting.", "post": "Alright so I DM'd this girl a grade lower than me in May and it only lasted for a few hours of back and forth. The conversation was pretty general and we just talked about school. Then she just stopped responding. No goodbye, nothing. Just never responded.\n\nFast forward to now, I decided to DM her again. And she answered and we talked all day until I had to go to work. The conversation was constant and the longest break between texts was around 15 minutes. I tried to make this one deeper and I got to know her a lot more. Before I went into work a I decided to ask for her number and she gave it to me. Then after work I texted her and she responded. And we talked for a few hours but then she fell asleep. Again no goodbye she just fell asleep, which I understand.\n\nShe texted me this morning telling me she fell asleep and then we texted again for a few hours. Then she did it again. She just stopped responding. Like she did in May. Its been a few hours and I know she must've seen it because she's been active on Twitter. \n\nI forgot to add that she has the read receipts on and even though she's been on Twitter she hasn't went into our conversation and looked at the text, probably so I don't see the read receipt. \n\nSo should I never text her again? I'm not sure what to do or what this means. She was super involved in the conversations and they don't die down she just doesn't respond. It's confusing lol. Any and all advice is helpful. Thanks!", "summary": "Girl I texted for a day stops responding to me and I don't know why. Conversations are always good but she just randomly stops responding."}
{"id": "t3_2fzegc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[30+/m] Not interested in marrying her. Should I bring this up sooner?", "post": "Guy here. Both of us are in our early 30's. We haven't been together very long (a few months) but things have gotten very serious already. I've been living at her place for extended periods of time and she keeps making jokes about marriage. It is confirmed that she is intending to have kids in approximately 5 years.\n\nShe's had quite a history including a divorce from her end. From the looks of it she's basically treating me already like the expected husband that her first turned out not to be. This is concerning me somewhat. I think she may actually be in love with me but there's a certain part of her past relationships that I'm not willing to accept (excluding the divorce) and will never consider marrying her because of this.\n\nI do not intend to dump her immediately as I actually enjoy her company. But I also do not see myself complying to her plans to start a family in said time frame. I don't want to waste her precious years on someone not willing to commit, but she's also pretty swamped at the moment with family and financial issues and leaning heavily on me for emotional support. My question is, should I bring up this issue now? Or wait a while first and see if her feelings for me will die down a little and/or her personal situation evens out?", "summary": "30 year olds. She loves me, considering marriage and kids. I like but don't want to marry her. Tell her first or play along for a while?"}
{"id": "t3_3xtbli", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "How are flowers for gifts?", "post": "A short description of the relationship and me, I guess.  I'm a 19 year old jobless college student, and this is the first girl i've been interested in, and my first christmas having any kind of relationship, so i'm pretty lost.  Unfortunately it's long distance, so it limits gifts a bit.  She's also 21, and has a small amount of experience with dating.  We were 'best internet friends' for a little over a year before this happened too, and we've been relationship-ish for probably a little over a month now.\n\nHer hobbies are pretty limited, video games and music basically.  So I thought why not go with the cheesy choice of flowers.  But fuck, flowers are expensive and die so easily.  Basically my question is, is the reaction to flowers actually worth it?  My decision is on you reddit, pls help.  If you need any more info, just ask, I'm so lost LOL.", "summary": "hopeless romantic wondering if the sweet feeling she'll get recieving these flowers is worth it, or if i should just get something different."}
{"id": "t3_3bempg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I confessed (f/26) my feelings to an ex (m/28)", "post": "I really don't want to get into the details  about the relationship but we could not be together due to distance. \n\nIt's been over two years and I have tried to move on (i.e. date other guys, no serious relationship), but I still have these deep rooted feelings for this guy because I never felt this way before with someone else. Upon encouragement from friends I sent him a message stating that I still have feelings for him and that I need closure. I was still holding on to some sort of false hope(that he still cares for me, is in denial and maybe change his mind) and it was beginning to get toxic with me trying to date men. Hence my friends input to let him know. \n\nMy ex responded  seeing that there is no future other than friends. That his messages were meant to be platonic. I was expecting this response. I mean after two years apart, if a guy really wanted something he would do something about it right? \n\nMy issue is that if I ever had a failed relationship, bad date or just felt lonely I thought of him. I had him at such pedestal.  So I need to completely  shut the door on these thoughts.I have now gotten the response, which is he does not share these feelings. \n\nAny words of advice would be appreciated on moving forward?", "summary": "Emailed my ex confessing about feelings I still have for him after two years. He did not reciprocate. Any words of advice on how to move forth?"}
{"id": "t3_3tmqix", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think he's embarrassed of me", "post": "I'm (42F) have been in an on and off relationship with a wonderful man (32M) for just over a year.  I am married, but have been separated for almost a year. My husband (44M) had been having an affair for 3 years. We have 2 children together. Our separation is ugly. He wanted me to stay. I tried for years, but can't stand being treated like I'm worthless anymore. \n\nSo I found happiness with this new man. I realize the age gap may be shocking, but it works because he's an old soul and I've always been fun and outgoing - a young soul. When people see us together, they assume we're the same age (I thank my mom and grandma for the good genes and lack of wrinkles). \n\nWe love each other. He thinks my kids are amazing, though I've only introduced him as a friend.  I don't think they're ready for a new man in the household. \n\nHe treats me well. But I have a huge problem with the fact that he won't tell his family or friends about me. He tells me they will give him grief over my age and the fact that I'm a soon to be divorcee with children. I'm not asking to be introduced to them, but I don't think it's unreasonable to ask that they know of my existence. As things stand now, he lies to them each time we get together. \n\nI explained that we have one life to live. Screw what other people think. In the end, they are not responsible for your happiness; you are. He became agitated and refused to talk about it further.  I'm feeling uncomfortable with being his big secret. I don't know how to get through to him. Or perhaps this is a sign that he isn't for me.", "summary": "I think my boyfriend is ashamed of me because I don't fit into the ideal image of what his friends and family think a girlfriend should be. Need advice on how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_yfhd6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Curing the 'What If' Feeling: F[24], M[24]", "post": "My boyfriend and I (Both 24) have been in a relationship for 2 years and a couple months now. Things had been going quite well, until last night he brought up that he's been having a feelings of 'what if.'\n\nFor the majority of the relationship we were long distance, but saw each other every other weekend. 3 weeks ago, we moved in with each other since we both now have jobs in the same area. Things seemed to be going pretty well. Then, throughout the last week, I noticed he wasn't hugging, kissing, touching me and things seemed strained for him. Finally, he let out that since I'm his first girlfriend, he is having feelings of 'what if there's someone better out there for me? How do I even know what I want since I've never dated anyone else?' and various related questions.\n\nI flat out asked him if he wanted to end things, but he constantly says \"I don't know, part of me wants to stay and part of me doesn't know\" (which I assume means part of him wants to leave). Upon prying a little more, he said that sometimes he feels like we are too similar and neither of us pushes the other to go out and do things... But this is untrue in my eyes. For the past 2 months, we have not had a free weekend because of going out and doing things. I also just moved into the area and started my first job, so I have been swamped with getting things in order (but trust me, I would love to go out and do things).\n\nMy question: How do I help him figure out what's best for him? Do I leave and give him space?", "summary": "Boyfriend of 2+ years having 'what if' feelings over relationship due to it being his first one. Don't know what to do or how to help him figure things out."}
{"id": "t3_tl4mc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Do any other gay redditors get uncomfortable around family when topics about gay rights/marriage come up?", "post": "I came out to my parents when I was 19.  It threw everyone of a loop, but it was nothing dramatic.  My family is mostly Southern Baptist, so they don't agree with homosexuality, but no one ever says anything to me.  In the past, when I had a boyfriend, he was welcome at my parents house.  I'm not a flamer or anything.  Almost everyone I meet don't know I'm gay when they meet me.  So, my parents aren't really reminded that I'm gay.\n\nHowever, when anyone brings up a topic about gay rights or marriage, I get very uncomfortable.  For instance last night when there was a story on the news about Romeny talking about gay marriage at the graduation ceremony.  I was going crazy inside.  I didn't know how to feel or what to think.   I was petrified until the story was over.  No one said anything.  But, for some reason, I always feel uncomfortable when stuff like that comes up no the news or in conversation.\n\nLet me stress, my parents love me very much and have never made me feel bad about being gay.", "summary": "Does anyone else feel uncomfortable when topics about gay rights/marriage come up around their parents/family, or certain people?"}
{"id": "t3_2havoa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I 27/F get over my three year relationship with my ex/SO (26/M)", "post": "I have been dating my SO for nearly three years, the past year of which I had to move back to my home town and in with my parents.  Because of this, and several other things, I became quite depressed and our relationship suffered for it, and it eventually led to us breaking up. One of the main reasons him giving is that i was too negative and he couldn't deal with my depression as well as his stress, which I can understand.  \n\nAlthough i can see that the relationship wasn't right for me, I just cant get past that initial stage of heartbreak.  I have just been a complete mess for the past few weeks, cant sleep, cant eat, I cant do anything.  Having read all the articles about how to get over a relationship, I'm trying to follow them, but things are made difficult by the fact that a lot of my friends have moved away from my home town, there isn't much to do in the way of hobbies around here (I live in a small Welsh village), and most of the friends that I made in the past three years are mutual with my ex so it is difficult to visit and attend social events without seeing him.  I just feel really lonely.  I just dont know how to get out of this slump that I'm in.  I know people say that you have to go through the pain, but I feel unless I do something, I will never get through it.  \n\nHow have you gotten over the initial stages of heartbreak reddit? The stage where your heart actually feels like its breaking :(", "summary": "Broke up with SO of three years, feeling extremely lonely, cant get over the initial heartbreak stage and move on."}
{"id": "t3_w2b5q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend wants to move in together. She wants a big fancy loft.", "post": "Me: 27, own a home, needs work, far from girlfriend and her job.  Her: 25, Still lives at home.\n\nWe have been together 8 months. Been through a rough patch, but generally doing well. Known each other 7+ years.\n\nShe wants to move in together, and this is a natural step for us but she wants to move into a very expensive loft in a well known popular area for young adults. (Lots of bars, nightlife, restaurants, etc etc..) It is an absolutely kick ass loft, no doubt.\n\nHere's the problem: I make a lot more than her. I could afford the loft on my own, but am much more frugal when it comes to monthly ongoing spending. I have normal bills. No car payment, no toys. Anyway, she is willing to split rent with me. Another problem: Her share of rent is basically her entire check for a two week period. \n\nBills haven't been factored in yet either. I own a home that needs quite a bit of work (my motivation for wanting to get out) so I have considered renting or selling it. Not a big problem. \n\nSo is it crazy to even allow her to get in over her head like this? I don't mind being the good boyfriend and taking her out every now and then, like I do anyway, but her family is naturally concerned and I don't want to hear her worrying about money two months from now.\n\nShe says \"We can just downgrade if we get in over our heads\" (The complex allows you to swap apartments mid lease term)\n\nI am VERY motivated to move out of my home not only because of the work it needs, but my brother also lives with me, who is holding me back in life and is completely irresponsible and messy. So yet another reason.\n\nI am more worried about her financials. I refuse to be her bank. Sorry, we're not married yet and not gonna dole out loans.", "summary": "Girlfriend wants expensive place on 30,000 a year salary, wants me to move with her, I make more money. Do it or don't do it?"}
{"id": "t3_1oep6v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend of 4 yrs [29M] and I [28F] don't really have sex as much anymore, and we're okay with it. Is that bad?", "post": "Would love to hear from others in similar situations. I've been with my bf for about 4 years now and we're pretty much in it for the long haul. Neither of us are marriage people, but we're basically in that stage of our relationship, to give you an idea. We've lived together for most of our relationship and we've grown very comfortable with each other, which is great. \n\nNow, we're kind of drifting into that territory where the sex has decreased a lot. It went from 4-5 times a week to maybe once every 2-3 weeks. It's been a gradual fade so it's not shocking or anything. And it's not for lack of attraction; we're both quite affectionate otherwise and are still attracted to each other. But it does seem strange how little it bothers me that we don't really do it anymore. And he doesn't seem to mind either; he's quite outspoken and open about his emotions so it definitely would have come up a while ago if it had been bothering him. I guess my only concern is is this going to be detrimental to our relationship eventually? I've read about dead bedrooms and people becoming frustrated and resentful over not getting the amount of sex they want... But I don't think it's affected us at all. My sister told me that she and her husband of 9 years started scheduling sex after they had their second kid because otherwise it would happen way less, but that sounds really unappealing to me. Like a doctor's appointment or something. I think if it's going to happen it should happen organically... But what do I know. I'm pretty young and inexperienced with all this. Is this lack of interest in sex something we need to take a closer look at in our relationship or should we just let it be and assume that's just how we are? Are there couples out there who just don't care about how much sex they have and still have a healthy relationship?", "summary": "Sex has dwindled over time; doesn't bother me or him at the moment, but is it worth doing something like penciling in sex just to keep it happening?"}
{"id": "t3_550y1q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] with my girlfriend [20F] together for 1month, got some doubts about what she's saying..", "post": "So I'm having issues understanding what my girlfriend means, or if I'm even doing the right thing. For some background info, this is my first real relationship outside of high school and hers also. According to her, I'm the first nice guy she's dated. I lost my virginity to her and I'm the first guy that she's had sex with, that actually stayed for longer than an hour to talk or cuddle or whatever. The past guys she's dated have treated her like one night stands: bang and bounce.\n\nAbout a week ago, her period started. No big deal. But after her period stopped, she was still kinda distant. I asked what was going on and she started crying and unloaded everything. She was worried about our future, she's worried I won't be enough for her, all of her past relationships have lasted a month and they all left. She wants to work on it and right now, we're still talking and together, but I'm having doubts. From what I understand from what she told me, these are irrational thoughts that just pop into her head. When I asked what I can do to help, she told me to \"give her space when [she] needs it, to let her talk to [me] needs/wants to\". I'm concerned that maybe she's not feeling anything between us anymore. I'm trying to be optimistic, but it's difficult when you're not getting good vibes back.\n\nIf I need to clear anything up, let me know. I'm really confused. Am I naive, am I missing something? Am I being too nice?", "summary": "Gf is afraid we're going to split even though shit's going great; says she needs space from time to time; am i reading too much into this?"}
{"id": "t3_1ogpij", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Am I trying so hard to make this work that I'm killing it? [22f]", "post": "I'm a 22f and my boyfriend (21) and I have been together for a little over five months. Not very long, but I feel like he's the best boyfriend I've ever had- at least the most romantic and thoughtful. He's so many things I feel like I want in a man: open-minded, smart, somewhat adventurous, thoughtful, sweet. He's even open to moving around (not always easy to find in Southern LA guys), has an adventurous appetite, AND is great in bed. He's VERY good at communicating, and understands himself well emotionally. He's the most affectionate, thoughtful, and communicative boyfriend I've ever had. But I've been unhappy. Almost this whole time. I don't know if it's the relationship or if I'm overthinking and taking things personally. Or maybe both? I feel like there's something wrong with me that I can't seem to enjoy a relationship with this wonderful guy who's worst characteristics come down to laziness, not having his life 'figured out', and being a bit quirkier than most of my friends. I keep telling myself that we can be happy, that I'm just getting in my own way with negative thoughts, but I have trouble stopping those negative thoughts. \n\nMy friends and family think this friendly, charismatic nerd is so wonderful and such a great match for me, but I don't know. \n\nIn past relationships, and now, I have a problem with maintaining my independence/being happy when alone. I'm not sure how complicated this all really is, but it feels like it's pretty complicated.", "summary": "If I think my bf is such a great person overall, why am I unhappy? Do I fabricate my unhappiness by fishing for faults?"}
{"id": "t3_1dnvay", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/F] I've outgrown my boyfriend [21/M] and I don't know how to break it to him.", "post": "We've been together 3 1/2 years. I'm away at college. He lives with my parents and just got a job (his parents are bad at being people). I feel like...\n1) long distance sucks, its keeping me from meeting new people\n2) I'm going away for the summer for an internship\n3) I feel like we are not on the same level intellectually and this is probably the biggest problem for me, i hate to say.\nI've been thinking about this for awhile and I don't know when the right time to tell him would be. I'm coming home for one weekend before going away for the whole summer. Questions I need answered by someone who cares:\n1. do I spend the whole day with him like everything is fine and wait till the end of the day or do I tell him right off the bat?\n2. what if he wants to have sex?\nmy mom is telling me to do what I want basically with out him knowing as a \"kindness to him\" while he gets his shit together to move out of my parents' house and not break up with him. I don't think this is right. He'll still be welcome there till the end of the summer whether or not I break up with him. He has no where else to go and my parents know that.\nThis is eating away at me. :(", "summary": "want to break off long distance relationship with bf that lives with MY parents while I am away at college. when/how?"}
{"id": "t3_3gafcf", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "My (22f) underage brother (16m) is having a child with his underage gf (16f). Our parents (47m/48f) are worried they will pay a lot in child support.", "post": "Pretty much what it says.\nMy brother got his girlfriend of a year pregnant. Odds are they might keep it.\nOur (my brother and I share the same parents) parents make collectively about 160K a year. Also, we live in MN if this matters. \nMy brother is 16, he drives, has his own car, no bills, is in high school and works part time.\nThe girlfriend/mother, has no license, no job and is in high school. Her older sister has 2 kids she does not have custody of; one of which is severely Autistic and needs constant care by the Grandma and Grandpa who is the sole caretakers. They don't make any money as they don't make a lot of money to begin with and they have a full house taking care of grandkids and the kids they still have.\nAnyways,\nMy main question is what can my parents expect, being the guardians of an underage boy having a child with another woman? They are worried they will have to pay up to a 3rd of their gross income to child support until my brother turns 18..is that right? What can they prepare for and what can they expect?\nAll your help is especially appreciated. Thank you.", "summary": "16 year old brother got a girl pregnant and my parents are freaking out because now they could have to pay child support on their 160K/year income"}
{"id": "t3_1af8xo", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Long term partner will barely have sex with me, I'm on business in another state and have someone putting pressure on me... HELP?", "post": "24f 29/m Relationship 2 years.  I'm on a scouting trip for about 6 weeks in another state, and my boyfriend just doesn't want to have sex.  I'm lucky if I can get it out of him about once every two weeks, and I'm going nuts. I've sat down with him and told him that I would like/need more sex, and he has acknowledged me, but I still have to initiate everything.  I asked him if he would initiate more, and he said he would when he feels like it but he NEVER does.  Our relationship has always been like this.  I really do love him, but this one thing is killing me.\n\nI have a business contact who is putting some serious moves on me, and the deep ache I have desperately wants me to give in.  No emotions, no connections, just sex.\n\nI could never understand what would drive anyone to cheat, the horror it is to me is still just that: horrific. But I'm 24 and sexually starved.\n\nWhat the fuck do I do?", "summary": "24/f barely getting laid in a committed relationship. Have a chance for a fleeting encounter, NSA, want to do it, but my god it's wrong. What do I do? Please help."}
{"id": "t3_386dby", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25F] think my friend [23F] [5 months] is getting romantically attached because we hooked up and I don't know how to proceed", "post": "So I started spending a lot of time with this woman I met through a mutual friend after a rough breakup. She was very supportive about letting me vent and checking up on me to make sure I was doing ok. I could tell she liked me and I had a crush on her too but I told her I wasn't ready to jump into anything and I needed time alone to process the last relationship. \n\nI'm not sure how it happened but at some point we got drunk and made out. It happened a few more times and led to us hooking up. We've had this friends with benefits thing going on for a while.\n\nNow that I've gotten to know her a little more...intimately,  I realized that I don't want a sexual relationship with her. I love spending time with her but I just don't think the sexual chemistry is there. I think I just jumped into things too quickly and now I'm not sure what to do.  She is very affectionate but I'm not. I don't pull away but I don't reach out either. She isn't getting the hint and I would much rather talk to her than just withdrawing without an explanation. \n\nMy problem is that I don't know what to say. I don't know how to talk about it. I think she is getting romantically attached and I'm afraid that I will lose her as a friend. I have repeatedly told her I don't want to be in a relationship right now but I think she might have the idea that it will progress into a relationship with time. It's been a few months since the breakup and I'm getting to the point where I think I could date again. I'm worried about her reaction if I meet someone else.\n\nI know I need to do something about it quick instead of leading her on but I'm putting it off because I'm afraid I'll lose her friendship and I don't know how to tell her.", "summary": "I want to turn a friends-with-benefits relationship into a just-friends relationship and I don't know how ."}
{"id": "t3_1iyikt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's one song/artist/band that you want to hear more of on commercial radio?", "post": "There are a lot of stations (In Canada for example, braap braap White North) that don't play a lot of the music that I like to hear. Either up and coming, unknown or underground and even some classics are totally forgotten by mainstream radio. \n\nPart of it is because of the regulations commissions and part of it (In Canada at least) is because of a need for playing home grown talent or \"CanCon\". To meet these regulations, stations end up playing either sub par songs, or the same ones over and over again to the point where you can switch stations and THE SAME FRIGGIN SONG IS PLAYING.\n\nI'd love to hear Slaughterhouse, Childish Gambino, Tech N9ne and stuff from the early 2000's (Clipse, Outkast, Mase etc) on the radio but that just doesn't happen.", "summary": "Radio plays crappy music in my opinion. What is some of the music that you wish got more playing time or even any playing time on the radio?"}
{"id": "t3_tegzs", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is this relationship one sided, Or am I being shallow?", "post": "Our car broke down in another state, and long story short we got jobs, found an apartment, started a new life here. \n\n  At first, I didn't have a job, and he paid for everything. Then, I got a job, worked my ass off and got promoted to full time. His contract was over and now he's looking for work again. I pay for everything now, with the deal that he will pay me back his half later. He said he would pay half of the rent out of his savings. \n  He's applied for about two hundred jobs, with no leads. He's been late giving me rent for the last two months, and he still owes me one hundred from last month. When I tried to explain that I was worried he didn't respect how important rent is, he quickly got upset, and stormed off into the night to find an ATM. Over the phone, i've begged him to come home- it's about 2am here- but he maintains that I just want his money, and \"everything is about money\" to me. For the record, it's not, I would pay all of the rent if he told me ahead of time he couldn't afford it. I'm worried about him walking for miles in a strange city so late. \n\n His ego has been wrecked lately, because of lack of work and unhappiness with his appearance. He dislikes how he looks because his hair has gotten shaggy, but he doesn't have money to cut it, and refuses my offer to pay for one. I think I may have hit a sore spot when I asked about the rent. He has been feeling inadequate lately, and this may have rubbed salt in his wounds. \n\n  How can I go about his better in the future? How do I know if i'm being taken advantage off?  I don't know anyone here, so thanks in advance for reading dear redditors.", "summary": "I'm paying for almost everything for my S.O and I. How Do I know if I'm being taken advantage of, or if I'm being shallow and money oriented?"}
{"id": "t3_2x0be6", "subreddit": "running", "title": "PSA: Don't forget to tape the adjacent toe when taping a blister.", "post": "I had minor blister trouble on my second toe, got it from rubbing action from the big toe in the past week; the big toe had no blisters on it whatsoever. I usually taped both the big toe and the second toe together in between to avoid friction, but today, leaving for my run in haste, I mindlessly taped the little toe standalone with durable cloth-based medical tape.\n\nAround 17km in (10mi) in I felt a stabbing pain in the big toe area and finished the last 3km in agony thinking that the big toenail had just fallen off or cracked. Took my sock off at home to discover the most horrific torn blister on my big toe. Ended up doing 100x more harm than going out untaped at all.\n\nNSFW/GOREish:", "summary": "taped my second toe, tape tore through adjacent untaped toe. Always pay close attention to what you're taping and how you're doing it."}
{"id": "t3_35iuym", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16M] found my mom's [49F] thong when i did the laundry. I wouldn't have cared except my dad [53M] has been away for 6 months. How to proceed?", "post": "Sorry if this post seems all over the place.\n\nSo, the title pretty much summarizes the situation. My dad has gone to is home country to work on his family business. This is the most time my parents have been apart since they met (around 1997, married since 1999). my mom has been talking more and more to her second in command \"Jack\". Her job is very high stress (humanitarian organization) and she must deal with emergencies as they arise, thus the increased contact. \n\nAnother thing worth mentioning is that my mom has been getting home relatively late, for about 2 weeks now. She says she has dinners that she must attend to. Whenever she talks to Jack (by phone), she walks away to somewhere out of earshot. The event that began my suspicions (around 2 months ago) was when i was in her office after school, and Jack came in. He was about to say something but he realized I was there. He asked if he could talk to her in private, so they left to another part of the building. She told me it would take 10 minutes. She came back an hour and a half later. Yesterday she got a call from him as we arrived home from doing errands. Again, she walked to a secluded area of our condominium and they talked for 20 minutes. I guess this entire thing is based on assumptions. \n\nI usually help out with the laundry, and we do it weekly, so if anything did happen, it must have been recent. I have 4 half sisters all above the age of 23 that live abroad (so it couldn't have been theirs), but I only live with my parents and my [18M] older brother.", "summary": "Found a thong when doing the laundry, am I right to be suspicious or was my mom a bit adventurous for a day?"}
{"id": "t3_uu4r9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My boyfriend is going to be kicked out and homeless in a few days, any form of help is all I need.", "post": "Hi there, I made a throwaway because I'm not here for karma I seriously need help. In the next few days my boyfriend's step dad will kick him out for not finding a job in less than a month and I need any form of help here.\nTo be frank his step father and biological mother are mentally and verbally abusive and always have been since we've been dating. They only talk to him like he is subhuman and blame all of his troubles on him. They've stolen hundreds from his paychecks when he was underage and stole his tax return this year. On top of that his stepfather bought him a car only with the intention of making him pay insurance and gas he could not afford so that my boyfriend would have to sell it again.\n\nEvery time I am there his stepfather goes right at him and yells even when we have company over. About three weeks ago he threatened to kick my bf out if he didn't find a job or fill out 20 applications a day. He hasn't found a job yet and he has about 8 days left.\n\nI'm urging him to just say fuck it and leave regardless but he cannot stay at my house long term for lack of space and food.(We're struggling) So reddit I am very desperate, what should I do? Are there any organizations that would take him in and help him? I'm very worried and I love him more than anything so please any advice or help is greatly appreciated.", "summary": "My boyfriend has abusive parents who want to kick him out, I'm taking him in regardless because that house is evil, but I cannot keep him forever. And advice or help is all I need. Thank you."}
{"id": "t3_1oaui4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think I [M 18] may have ruined my nearly 2 and a half years relationship with my SO [F 18]", "post": "A month ago I was in a happy relationship up until my SO moved for Uni, I was scared that she would forget about me or find someone new and I had told her this. I was upset and jealous that her life was moving on while mine's stuck. I wanted her to need me but she didn't. I have been miserable but I had been doing it to myself. For some bizarre unknown reason, I thought that making her feel bad would make things better and I kept pushing her away. I didn't realise I was doing this until the night before last when I texted her saying \"Promise me you're not going anywhere?\" and she couldn't. I instantly realised what I had been doing and regret every part of it. She's the best thing that's ever happened to me and I've never met anyone like her. We talked a little yesterday and I told how I felt and that I regret what I've done and don't want to lose her. She told me that the way I had been acting was bothering her but she hasn't really been trying either, I told her she wouldn't have not wanted to if I wasn't pushing her away and doing what I was. She stayed over and left an hour ago.\n\nI think I pushed her too far and she doesn't see me the way she used to. I really don't want this to end, she's perfect for me in every way and I want to make her happy again. I think we need to talk more but I'm scared I'll find out she doesn't want things to go back to how they were or that she already felt that way.\n\nI need advice, I don't know what to do. I feel horrible, I've been such an idiot. Feel free to ask any questions, I'm new to this.", "summary": "I was a crappy boyfriend and pushed my SO away, I'm scared I pushed her too far and that she doesn't want things back."}
{"id": "t3_1m0kzd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[25M] with my ex[20F] 6 months, she broke up with me out the blue, we work together, how do i move on!", "post": "Recently my GF of 6 months broke up with me out of the blue. We have been working together in the same department of a company for about a year now. After about a week of being uncharacteristically distant towards me she said she \"thinks we were only supposed to meet each other and learn from one another\" and that she \"feels like we should just be friends\". I told her I couldn't just be her friend, not at this point at least, because I see her as more than that and it would be unfair to both of us at this time. I want to get over her and do as much NC as possible, but I work anywhere from 10 to 40 hours  a week with her and both of us are comfortable with our jobs. To make it a little worse she is good friends with a lot of my family and contacts them frequently. She is adamant that we are never getting back together. Any advice on how to cope with this situation especially while at work?", "summary": "my Gf of 6 months broke up with me, she wants to just be friends, but I see her as more. We work together and neither of us are switching jobs, how do I get over this?"}
{"id": "t3_rwiwg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "SO and I disagree on having kids looks like im going to be forever alone", "post": "gf is 25f im 29m. Been dating 1 year 4 months. Moved in together at 9 months Originally posted in /r/childfree  but after reading through the comments it sounds like i need a more objective opinion than a group of people who specifically don't want kids ever.\n\nAfter we had our talk about kids and we both kinda realized that our relationship was likely doomed she has gone out all night long and didnt bother calling me or anything to come pick her up. This is not behavior that she ever does so I kinda got suspicious and looked at her text messages on her phone. I now know she is not telling me the whole truth about what went on the two nights out and she is definitely texting a guy she met at the bar the first night out.\n\n I just find it shocking that she can so quickly start looking for another guy. I am still trying to heal and recover from this relationship possibly being lost.\n\nWhere do i find the strength to end this relationship and how the hell do i cope with the moments of anguish and despair I am going to feel throughout the next month?", "summary": "GF and I disagree about having kids, now she is going out and partying all night long and lying to me about the details."}
{"id": "t3_3h2wmx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[30F] not sure what to do about [31M] husband of 3 yrs, relationship of 10 yrs- is it okay to use the same pet name (note its a unique one- not baby, honey, etc.) on other women as you do your wife?", "post": "My husband and I have been together 10 yrs and married for 3 yrs. I logged into our home computer and my husband left up one of his personal accounts.  I being curious decided to look at a few messages he had with people (it's intrusive, I know!). Anyway, didn't find anything crazy, but I did end up feeling slightly annoyed by how he addressed some female friends.  He has a pet name that he calls me which is pretty unique (not honey, babe, etc.). I have never heard him call anyone else the name in the 10 yrs we have been together. In the messages he referred to some of his female friends with the pet name.\n\nI am annoyed because all this time I thought it was personal, and now I find out it's not. Also, to me, calling someone a pet name is a little flirtatious (though his messages otherwise did not seem overly friendly).  What makes it more annoying is that I have had conversations with him recently about not talking to me like I am his \"friend\" but his wife, and see it's the opposite here (he's too friendly with them).\n\nShould I be mad?  Seeing as I found out about it in an intrusive way, is there a way of talking to him about it without giving away how I found out? What would you do?  Should I be worried about my relationship?", "summary": "Found out my husband calls other women by the same pet name he uses on me by checking his personal account. Now don't know how to address it, since I shouldn't have seen it in the first place."}
{"id": "t3_xifc5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M/29] Does the traditional no sex/no cohabitation/no foreplay rules [F/28] till marriage actually lead to a stronger marriage?", "post": "My girlfriend 28 has grown up with a very strong set of beliefs that there should be no sex/foreplay/cohabitation till marriage, subsequently she has never had a solid relationship, has never had sex or fallen in love. To put things in perspective, she had recently achieved (her first) orgasm one night I had helped her though her cloths.\n\nSo here we are dating... going out to dinner a few times a week, making out on the couch like teenagers. If I press her too far sexually, she then regresses back and that is not done for a few weeks. Meanwhile I am thinking, that I will never be close enough to marry her if we are not progressing the relationship (foreplay, spending the night, maybe even moving in with each other at some point).\n\n------------------------------------------------------\n\nWhen I asked her values she states the following. :\n\n\"I dont want to be test ridden like a car\".\n\n\"If I am going to act like the wife, why not become the wife\".\n\n\"Its harder to just walk away when you are married\".\n\n\"I would feel less of my self if I was living with someone who did not marry me\".\n\n\"Marriage is great for taxes\".\n\n\"I need to be engaged before we do anything more than we are currently doing\".\n\n\"I know you want to buy a house, but I wont move in unless we are married (once we are married I want us to buy a joint house together so were both on the title and the partner could never say \"this is MY house\".\n\n\"We could sign a prenump if you want\".\n\n--------------------------------------------------------\n\nLike this is some formula for a relationship, minus the love that would somehow fall into a good relationship.\n\nI dont see any of this shit above.. I want basic love, love that would flourish into a normal sexual life, and progress into a strong relationship, then marriage.\n\nI currently feel none of this and here is she talking about heavy, outdated formal dating. Dont get me wrong I like this girl, but every time she talks about this I drift further apart.", "summary": "Current (relationship novice) girlfriend is making me jump through all the traditional dating to marriage hoops like its some sort of magic formula for a successful marriage, I am not feeling any of this and see it as a receipt for disaster."}
{"id": "t3_3dacs5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with a girl I started talking to online [22 F] for two weeks, not sure how to proceed.", "post": "Immediately we hit it off, we like a million and one things together, we laughed about it and have texted a *ton*. In fact, I've even been texting her more than other girls that I actually *have* taken out on real dates. So far I haven't seen this girl though, we'll call her Paige, but we get along a lot and have talked on the phone for long times. She said she is hesitant because she's been hurt before. But we get along great.\n\nHowever recently she went out on a family trip to her old state. I don't really know what the protocol is, but I've been texting her a lot less. I assume she is with family and stuff. But I notice the past few texts Thursday, one on Friday just wishing her a good vacation, and then something similar with a joke yesterday. I know she said she would be with her family for a while like a few days, but I am going to not text her anymore, obviously. I hope I didn't mess it up already? Why do you think it's taking so long? I mean I know she's with family but do you think she became uninterested or just busy?", "summary": "Girl that we are planning to go on date when she returns from trip we've been talking a lot, now on trip and talk is a lot less, wondering if I should just not text for a bit."}
{"id": "t3_1x92to", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Ex (also roommate) wants to remain friends after cheating on me. What do I do?", "post": "So I had been with my boyfriend for two years and he studied abroad last summer and met someone overseas. It hurt but I got over it and tried to remain friends. They pretty much have kept in touch since then and this guy wants to fly him out to him for spring break. Even though I don't have feelings for him it hurts. I honestly wouldn't care if he dated anyone else but the fact that he's going back to the source that has caused me so much pain hurts. I told him i will never be able to look at him again. So my question is:\n\nEven though I don't have feelings currently he is my best friend..but if he decides to go I don't think I will be able to be friends with him. Am I in the wrong? Also we live together and sleep in the same bed (and no we don't have sex) I just want to make sure I'm being mature about this.", "summary": "boyfriend cheated on me overseas. we live together and have been for two years. now were exes and he wants to go on spring break with the guy and come back and expect everything to be \"normal\""}
{"id": "t3_39dbv0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "One (60s?M) of my husband's (38M) work contacts keeps giving him free stuff. (Non-romantic)", "post": "My husband is a pro chef. During the last year, he has set up or rehauled the menus of several restaurants. In all of them he has introduced his favourite providers (there might be a different word for this in English; I'm talking about the companies who sell produce) because they offered the best service, price or quality. My husband has NEVER gotten any kickbacks from this: he really chooses the sellers he thinks are best and doesn't get a commission or gifts from them.\n\nOne of these sellers is located in the nearest market from our house, so we often buy from him for our own meals. During the last six weeks we have bought from him maybe seven times and out of those seven, three times he has refused to charge us and two other times he has undercharged us (one time he mentioned the discount and the other time he didn't, but I noticed). The first time we were fine with it because it was a small sale, but it's gotten to the point where both my husband and I are uncomfortable with this.\n\nWe have told the seller that he shouldn't keep refusing to charge us or we'll be too embarrassed and won't buy from him anymore, but he just laughs it off. I do not want to stop buying from him: his produce is the best in the market! But I don't want him to keep giving us free food. The worst part is that every time he gives us free stuff we feel obligated to go and make a big purchase from him so he'll charge us (he usually charges us for the big purchases, gives us the small purchases for free). \n\nI do not think this can have negative effects in my husband's job, but it's making us uncomfortable and the whole thing is a bit ridiculous. How can we make this guy understand that we really want him to charge us for all of our purchases?", "summary": "My husband gets new customers for guy. Guy is thankful and gives my husband free food. How do we tell the guy we don't want free food?"}
{"id": "t3_2egvc0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] together 2 years, he emailed himself a screenshot of a tinder 'moment'", "post": "I have been with my boyfriend for >two years, living together for one. He very recently moved across the country to begin medical school, making our relationship long distance for the first time. \n\nWe talked in depth about this change and plan to stay together. I am looking for work in his new city.\n\nHis email automatically logged in while I was using my laptop, and my curiosity got the best of me so I clicked on a message he sent to himself that contained an image.  It was a screenshot of a tinder 'moment', which I only figured out after reading more only about tinder because I have never had it. The \"moment\" was of a pretty girl's face, about our age, a few miles away and active a few minutes ago.\n\nI don't know what to think. I want to ask him about it but I am ashamed I looked on his email and I don't really want to tell him. I will not be seeing him in person for a few weeks.\n\nI obviously never thought he used tinder but now tons of doubts are creeping in. Do you think he was browsing girls in his new area? Why email himself...? \n\nUgh this sucks. I appreciate any constructive input.", "summary": "I came across an email message my boyfriend sent to himself that only contained what looked like a screenshot (from him phone?) of a girl's tinder \"moment\". What is this? What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3mz5tt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (20F) boyfriend (25M) of 3 years is planning to meet another woman (20's F) he's been talking to for years.", "post": "So, I've been seeing this guy for 3 years and we've had our fair share of issues with adultery/cheating, which I thought we had solved.\n\nRewind to few months ago, I randomly saw his phone go off and saw a name pop up with a text. We'll call her Quinn. I'm just kind of curious so I ask him about it and he doesn't say anything. For days and days, I try to get an answer out of him and finally he tells me he's known her for years and plans to have a relationship with her but she has a husband and baby. He explains that she's \"unhappy\" and \"stuck\" in a relationship she doesn't want to be in because they live with the husbands parents.\n\nI really honestly don't believe it, for one, if you're unhappy in a relationship, just bring that Shit up. Two, if you're married, I understand feeling trapped, but why would purposefully try to CONSTANTLY hit up someone else's significant other (going either way with that.)?\n\nSo, we have an argument, I give up, and it goes away for a while. Until he leaves his phone unlocked one day, and seeing as we've had problems before and he grabs his phone away from me any time he sees I have it, I look at the conversation going on. He's telling her that he's unhappy with me and that he wants to actually be \"happy\" and actually love someone... I broke down. \n\nI brought it up as calmly as I could and instead of explaining he went off on me for \"invading his privacy\" and left like he always does when he's losing/has no way to defend himself.\n\nMy question is, what should I do about it since he won't listen to me and it hasn't stopped? I really can't handle sharing a man, as bad as that sounds, and I don't want to control him.", "summary": "Bf has a good friend who lives far away that he's been planning to bang behind my back. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_qtbky", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Recent university graduate looking for advice", "post": "I am posting here in hopes that I can get some advice from anyone who has gone through or is in the same situation as I am. Here is the basics:\n\nI graduated university about 1 year ago with a Bachelors degree in Mathematics.  After graduating I looked for a jobs for about 3 months with no success.\n\nI have a minor in Computer Science, so I was searching for jobs in the technical area. Anything from web developer, to IT desk, to QA analyst.\n\n At that point I literally had no relevant job experience (Only working part-time and summer jobs as a student)\n\nAfter applying to 80+ jobs and getting less than 5 responses I went back to my old summer job as a landscaper. I was then able to find a small start up company that I could volunteer at as a web developer. \n\nFast-forward 6 months, I am still at the start-up full-time, but I cannot go much longer without any income. I also don't feel like the experience I am getting is very valuable. This company is very unstructured and I have no \"mentor\" in terms of programming, I am often the go-to guy when it comes to problems. I continue to apply for jobs, but with no success. \n\nMy question is, what are my options?  I have enough money saved up I could go back to school but which program? Should I go to college, try and get into a Master program? or even a 2nd bachelors?\n(I'm from Canada, so college is like a lower tier University here, usually with more practical courses while Universities offer more theoretical courses)\n\nShould I stick it out in hopes this experience will land me a new job? \n\nIt's not the worst situation to be in, but I feel like I will have to do something soon. \n\nAny advice would be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "Recent university grad having no lucking finding a job, asking for anyones advice who is in or gone through a similar situation"}
{"id": "t3_xrmzm", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Had my first terrible run since running became not-terrible for me", "post": "So I've been running for awhile now, something like 15 weeks; finished a C25K, lost 30 lbs. Not fast - lol - by any stretch of the imagination, but my usual average of late has been just over 11 MPM, and I run for 30+ minutes every other day. It's a big deal for me because when I started, a minute of running was Hell. Anyway, ever since I made it to around the five or six week mark, running has become  something I look forward to, and enjoy despite the difficulty. \n\nMy last run...was brutally awful. Not just poor performance but poor feelings. I just had zero energy; it was like I was hit with a tranquilizer dart as soon as I started. By the last ten minutes I think a walker would have breezed past my dragging feet, and I was moving by sheer willpower. It was just terrible. Has this ever happened to you? I felt fine before the run, and started with the hope of a new PR.", "summary": "had my first \"wtf happened\" run, and I'm wondering how to prevent that from happening again - or if it's normal and should be infrequently expected."}
{"id": "t3_2fdvr2", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "etiquette help on inviting a guest", "post": "my fiance and i are throwing a very intimate family get-together so that our two immediate families can meet each other before the big day. this is also the first celebratory thing of any sort that he and i are doing for our wedding/engagement. the total head count is 19--only our parents, siblings, their spouses and children are invited. no friends, no aunts/grand parents/god parents, etc. are invited. we have made reservations at a very high end restaurant for the event, and are footing the bill for this and EVERYTHING else wedding-related.\n\nhis parents divorced on strained terms in 2011 due to cheating, among other reasons. they are cordial to each other (and very socially well behaved) at family gatherings. \n\none of my fiance's siblings gave us the heads up that FMIL would like to invite her boyfriend to this intimate dinner. fiance and i have met FMIL's boyfriend a total of 2 times ever since his parents divorced. we're not close. at all. i don't even know this guy's last name. previous family gatherings have included drama where one parent threatens to not attend if other parent's significant other also attends, though nothing like that has happened here (yet). we are assuming that would be the same case here. we'd really prefer to have both his parents attend. to FMIL's defense, she has been dating this gentleman for ~2.5 years, no threats of attendance have or haven't been made.\n\nthe family dynamics aside from FMIL's boyfriend is already a precarious social situation: not everyone gets along perfectly, but can be mature enough to hopefully behave themselves. despite how important these people are to us, and how much we may love them, we struggle to get along with the dynamics sometimes, which will already make this a very interesting dinner. the subject of the dinner is us, and not our families, and i feel that it is appropriate for us to leave it in the intimate setting in which we intended.\n\nso bottom line: do we invite FMIL's boyfriend and if we do not, how do we address this so FMIL doesn't freak out on us? are we being unfair?", "summary": "FMIL wants to invite her boyfriend to a very intimate engagement dinner. it feels extremely awkward and out of place. do we invite him? if not, how do we handle this?*"}
{"id": "t3_3td5la", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Helping empty nesting parents, what to do?", "post": "xpost from /r/legaladvice as they suggest /r/personalfinance would have good insights\n\n\u00a0\n\nI'm at a phase in life where I'm helping take care of many matters for my parents. I need to find who would be the right set of people to consult with (tax attorney? real estate attorney? cfa?) in Chicago, IL. Regarding my parents situation:\n\n\u00a0\n\n- Only social security income (addl: help with everything i can)\n- 50-75k in credit card debt\n- Owe 300k on primary home (unable to sell, been trying)\n- Inherited ~175k property (rented it out in past - no remaining mortgage - very sellable)\n\n\u00a0 \n\nI need to understand the best way for them to sell both properties (tax and other implications) and protect $ from rental property sale to use towards general debt + retirement. Thank you so much!!!", "summary": "need trustworthy chicago attorney to discuss protecting $ in selling homes with debt. or open to any new approaches and ideas!  Thank you so much!!"}
{"id": "t3_r5x0h", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my university is about to go on strike and it's going to screw over the graduating class, what can we do!?", "post": "Our school went on strike at the beginning of our university careers in 2008 and went from October to February when they were legislated back to work by the government. For those who didn't transfer to different schools or drop out entirely, two semesters worth of classes were compressed to fit into a Feb-June timeline.\n\nNow, they're about to strike again, right before exams. This is going to mess up people's plans for getting a job for the summer (This same shit happened in 2008 that I forgot about, we had significantly less time to work and almost zero opportunities to work as all the other uni students were already on summer break), grad school applications, and career employment for graduating students. \n\nThis is not to mention that many of the students graduating from our campus are international students and this could mean they have to leave the country before they can graduate, as their visas may expire. Even if they are able to stay, they also need to have arrangements to live somewhere, etc etc. \n\nSo many problems will arise from this, **WHAT CAN WE DO??", "summary": "school struck in 2008, screwed over lots of students, school about to strike again as exams loom, screwing over even more"}
{"id": "t3_3aithh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How Do You Walk Away From That!?", "post": "Me 27M and my ex 25F.  Best friends for 9 yrs serious relationship for 7 yrs.  Broke up with me because she started liking another guy.  After, she regretted sleeping with him.  All he wanted was to hit and quit but he sucked in bed.\n\nShe literally left the best sex she's ever had.  I gave her her first orgasm and after that it was rare for her to not get an orgasm when we had sex.  Sometimes she would get two.  She left her best friend.  We had a connection where we could really just be ourselves and be comfortable, talk about anything.  She left her cat.  She loves my cat and still misses her a lot.  She left a less stressful lifestyle.  She became a manager, high stress and lots of hours for lower pay.\n\nI'm not exaggerating any of this.  Honestly I'm not looking to get her back but sometimes when I think about it or my friends bring it up it just baffles me how she really left all that.\n\nI'm just bored and curious.  She's contacted me a few times before.  Do you think she'll try to come back or nah?", "summary": "Ex left a loving LTR with her best friend and the best sex she's ever had.  Do you think she'll try to come back to that?  (Not trying to get back together people...)"}
{"id": "t3_v83d1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What ignorant thing do people say/do about your heritage that makes you want to punch their lights out?", "post": "I'm a Kenyan. And fiercely proud of it (and this is neither here nor there but thank y'all Reddit for the overwhelming Omari response, you got my homeboy covered). I now live in the US and I just love it. I identify as Kenyan-American.\n\nI keep tabs on news from home and this made me both sad and angry. \"Primitive energy\" conjures up images of topless women shaking their tatas in delirious glee and chest thumping. Now, granted, there are some tribes in Kenya who go topless (and with that I lost half the audience as they opened a tab with that Google search) but I feel that this was an inappropriate tag line. \n\nDespite what the documentaries portray about Africa as a whole, I think the use of the word primitive is unjustified. I'll speak for Kenya in particular. There have been significant contributions from the country and some of the ones that come to mind:\n1. We have/had the first female professor in East & Central Africa and Nobel Laureate: Prof. Wangari Maathai (RIP)\n2. How can I forget our long distance athletes (though this might be an argument for the other side, running away from lions will sure give you killer hamstrings)\n3. The world's first mobile money-sending app (M-pesa)\n\nAre we underdeveloped, without a doubt. Do we have poverty, absolutely. Are we doing the best we can to get ourselves out of the poverty quagmire? Yes. But primitive...I don't think so.", "summary": "Kenyan finds ad calling her people primitive, throws a hissy fit and proceeds to crudely hew together some sentences to prove said point. "}
{"id": "t3_u6qhd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My friend works at a California Charter School and their principal is disregarding their charter and threatening to fire anyone who questions his leadership. What can she do?", "post": "I'm not an educator but my friend is having a really hard time at her job right now and I was wondering if anyone could help.\n\n**The Issue:**\n\nShe works for a charter school in California where the principal has gone off the deep end. At first it started casually with cuts and a few firings (understandable at the time because of budget cuts). It steadily got worse however as he slowly stripped the teachers of any rights/protections they once had. Now he's threatening to fire them at any time if they refuse to work late/take personal days/attempt talks with the teachers union/show signs of disagreeing with the principal's leadership, etc.\n\nThis guy has continually canceled meetings by any form of teacher-staffed governing boards that would normally provide the teachers with a voice. Now he just dictates policy for the school with no regard or input from the teachers. He has threatened to let anyone go if they show even the slightest dissatisfaction with his decisions.\n\nKeep in mind this was a very good school before this guy came in. It's not like it was a failing school in need of some tough love. As far as scholastic achievement goes, not much has changed since this guy was hired on (which is why I suspect he still has a job despite complaints to district).\n\nIs there anything my friend can do to oust this guy or at least protect her job?", "summary": "My friend is a teacher. Several of her students have gone missing and the principal may be a werewolf. How do I help her?"}
{"id": "t3_18nc1f", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/f] I want to be less sexual with my boyfriend of 5 months (17/m), but I'm seriously struggling.", "post": "We're both freshmen in college (yes, he's 17, he graduated high school early). We met here and instantly had a connection. We are both wanting to save sex for marriage, which is wonderful and I'm so happy, but I'm having a difficult time trying to release my built up sexual energy.\n\nI just started taking an anti-depressant and it has made \"self-pleasure\" very difficult and not appealing at all, therefore I have a LOT of sexual energy with no way to release it. To top this all off I just got a job for the first time in a pretty stressful environment and that's not helping this situation at all. Him and I have recently become more sexual and it's pretty much my fault, and I feel terrible. When I'm not around him, all I want to do with him is snuggle and hold hands and just love him with everything, and then we hang out and I get extremely horny. I don't want this relationship to be ruined because it turns from love to lust. Neither of us want to be this sexual.\n\nI don't really know what kind of advice I'm looking for, sorry about that. I just don't know how to fix this.", "summary": "I'm really horny but my boyfriend and I don't want to be sexual, which is fine, but I don't know how to fix this."}
{"id": "t3_2g2uxt", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to change my computer's wallpaper", "post": "Earlier today I was sitting in a college lecture with my laptop open. I decided I was tired of my usual background and was going to change it to my favorite sport team's logo. The picture I wanted was in the \"my pictures\" folder.\n\nNow let's go back a little bit. \n\nFirst or second night of the fappening (may it rest in peace) and I download the Kate Upton and j law pictures and just to be quick about it, I put it in \"my pictures\" with the intent on moving it later. I forgot to move them... \n\nNow back to today in the lecture, I went to change the background, clicked \"my pictures\" and it automatically expected that I wanted to have it cycle through every picture in that folder. My background fades into a picture of a close up of Kate Upton's tits. I panic and just freeze trying to figure out if there was a quick undo I could do, but in my panic, I forgot what cancel meant. So I just shut my laptop and pretended nothing happened... I was surrounded by people, no one said anything but someone had to have seen.", "summary": "Tried to change my wallpaper to the packers, accidentally put Kate Upton's tits on while surrounded by people in my class."}
{"id": "t3_3107xn", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by enjoying Legend of Zelda music and Clock Town.", "post": "This is pretty minor, but it nearly gave me a (not literally) heart attack, so I think it's worth posting here.\n\nI like Zelda games. A lot. I finished Majora's Mask 3D last week, and today during school I was in the mood for some Majora, but, you know, school. So I decided to listen to the soundtrack by searching first for the Clock Town theme.\n\nI have a crappy phone, so the touchscreen isn't very accurate most of the time. I typed in \"Clock\" but somehow resulted in me missing the \"l\" and typing \"Cock\" instead. I rolled my eyes in frustration, tried to hit the backspace, but what do you know, I hit search.\n\nI thought at the time that I was using my school's free wifi (Which you have to sign up for using your school account that is given to you, and is monitored) so I completely freaked out and gasped really loudly, basically everyone in the room stared at me for a few seconds. I knew I was screwed at this point, there would have been no way out of facing that punishment. How do you explain to the AP why you were searching \"cock\" in the middle of the school day? You can't.\n\nBut, thank you, hindsight. I had turned off my wifi and switched to my network just a minute before. So, luckily, I don't have to explain why I was searching for the slang term for male reproductive organs in the middle of school. Still, people probably now think that I have some kind of hypersensitivity to my phone...", "summary": "Accidentally searched \"cock\" instead of \"clock town\" while I thought I was using the school's monitored wifi, had a freak out in the middle of class and everyone looked at me weird."}
{"id": "t3_tts0d", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I need ideas for an AMAZING prank. Hit me with your wildest practical jokes.", "post": "So there's this one guy in our friend group, I'll call him Spencer for anonymity purposes. In my years I have found that most friend groups, including my own, have at least one if not more \"Spencers\". I'm talking about the whiny, mean, lazy, sloppy goodfornothing that nobody REALLY likes, but hey, he's been along for so long that it's just impossible to get rid of him. \n\nNow Reddit, this is where I need your help. The school year is coming to an end very soon, and I was hoping to fill the summer with loads of zany, intricate, pranks to execute on \"Spencer.\" I need your best ideas for for any pranks that cause public humiliation or physical DISCOMFORT. We do NOT want to harm him in any way, as his rage and fists of fury make him a dangerous adversary when he is hurt. That's my proposal reddit, learn me your best pranks!!", "summary": "I have a shitty friend that my friends and I want to prank the hell out of this summer, let me hear your best pranks to incite public humiliation, fear, or physical discomfort!"}
{"id": "t3_2ul6ms", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [f21] boyfriend [m21] is going to therapy for issues he has resulting from a chronic kidney disorder, how can I support him during that time?", "post": "My [f21] boyfriend [m21] is going to be going to therapy soon for a lot of anxiety and depression brought on by a chronic kidney disorder he has been dealing with for years now.\n\nWe have decided to revert back to a dating kind of lifestyle together where we see each other a limited amount, and only to go to eat somewhere or go to the movies, etc. basically only on dates....so no sleeping over or hanging around apartments for extended amounts of time.\n\nWe will continue to keep in contact like we normally do whenever we are apart.\nWe go to the same university so we are never too far from each other if we need one another.\n\nWe felt it's best to have space so he can focus on himself and getting better. \n\nI understand that finding the right therapist, as well as therapy itself is a long process, and that there is a chance it could get worse before it gets better for him.\n\nAll I ask is how can I help support him through this process while maintaining my own happiness and helping him stay positive about his experience with therapy once he goes?", "summary": "boyfriend is going to therapy. how can I help support him through this process while maintaining my own happiness and helping him stay positive about his experience with therapy once he goes?"}
{"id": "t3_446rk4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30F] have a crush on a librarian [30ishM] and I'm not sure how - or if - I should pursue it.", "post": "I'm at my local library a lot, for the obvious reasons - mountains of books and a peaceful place to study. There's a reference librarian who works there, and I've had the massive hots for him since day one. He ticks a lot of boxes for me - tallish, sandy-haired, soft-spoken, well-dressed, good-looking in a flawed, accessible way. Plus, you know, he's a librarian, which is sexy. I also know from his staff bio on the library's website that he got his master's in the same town I lived in a few years ago, and the I'm tickled by the fact that we both lived there and ended up here, halfway across the country.\n\nThere are two problems here:\n\n1. I'm usually not good at cold approaches. I have a reasonable amount confidence in my ability to talk to strangers comfortably/engagingly, but I'm also introverted and neurotic and often don't have any idea how to go from Interest to Interaction. If someone strikes up a conversation with me I'm usually game, and if I can find a good excuse to chat someone up I'll sometimes go ahead and do it. I'm just a little stuck in this particular situation. Partly because ...\n\n2. I'm hesitant to approach people while they're on the clock. I've worked my fair share of jobs in which I was required to interact with the public, and I always hated it when a customer would try to pitch woo at me - the pressure to be polite is enormous, even if you're cringing inside. I'm not saying I'm gonna start pelvic thrusting at this guy while he's trapped behind his desk until he starts crying; I'd just like to talk to him a bit while also being sensitive to the fact that he might not welcome flirty interaction while he's working.\n\nPeople who are wiser and more well-adjusted than I, please advise. Should I even bother? If so, how should I go about it?", "summary": "I have a thing for an employee at my local library but I'm not great at approaching and a little iffy about coming on to people while they're working. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_2wu385", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not watching where im walking", "post": "This happened to me like 20 minutes.\n\nSo today was the first day of tafe. i honestly was expecting a terrible day ( because i left yr 12 to attend), but my expectations were exceded. There were only 3 other students in the class and there was a pair of good friends making the feel of the classroom bubbly and fun to be in. I had a good time so i whipped out my phone and music and started my way back to the train station. As i was really happy what had happened today i wasnt looking at the path i was walking on and this is where i TIFU.\n\nmy foot encountered a slimy surface as it walked over it. curious as i was i looked behind me... and there is was a huge piece of shit smeared over 30 cms long. i thought it mustve been like that. i look at the bottom of my shoe and it went from a black surface to a complete brown colour. so i spend about 3 minutes trying rub my shoe in te grass but the genius i was it sunk into the cracks of my shoe. best part was if i wasnt trying to clean it i wouldnt have mossed my train and now i have to wait 20mins...", "summary": "watch where you're walking or suffer a shit smeared shoe while riding in a enclosed moving coffin moving at 50-60 km/h and stinking up the carriage"}
{"id": "t3_4kdvfl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] bf is handsy at night and keeps me [24F] awake", "post": "Good morning, everyone. I'm very tired.\n\nMy boyfriend and I don't live together, but we have been dating for 4 years. 2 years of that was long distance. When we're awake, he is very affectionate and kind. He likes to hold me, and kiss me and be close. We often spend Sundays cuddled on the couch, watching movies/youtube videos. I like his affection a lot.\n\nAt night though... he often wakes me up by grabbing my tits and ass. Often times, I'll wake up to him grinding his hard dick against me, either my hip or my ass. Sometimes, it is actually painful. Sometimes he'll have this junk out of his boxers. Sometimes he'll put my hand on his junk. A lot of the time, precum gets all over my sheets, comforter, and my clothes. This doesn't happen every night, but it happens more often than not. I don't think the issue is that we're not having enough sex. He's usually at my place from Saturday afternoon to Sunday afternoon, and we'll have sex anywhere from 3-5 times, *plus I'll give him 2-3 blow jobs.*\n\nI've talked to him about this, about how sometimes he hurts me while he's grinding against me. How it wakes me up, and really messes with my sleep schedule. I get very little sleep usually, due to my stressful job. I average at about 5-4 hours, and use the weekends to try to catch up. Him waking me up really cuts back on my weekend sleep. He always seems to contrite and sad when I bring it up, he apologizes and then tries to make it up to me... but then it happens again. I don't know what to do.", "summary": "Boyfriend keeps waking me in the middle of the night by grinding his hard dick on me. I've talked to him about it, but it keeps happening. Help."}
{"id": "t3_54y8bn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [19F] & I [20M] have been together for 3 years & have never really dated other people. Should we?", "post": "Background: GF & I were each other's first serious relationship & have been together for more than 3 years now. We're both super young to have been in a relationship for so long, but when we met, we clicked really well (& still do!). Our relationship even survived the transition from going to the same high school to different colleges. We're still very much within driving distance though, which helps a lot. We absolutely love each other & are each other's best friend. \n\nGF mentioned to me recently that we should both probably see other people, just to make sure that we've gone on dates with people beside each other. We've kind of progressed from joking about marriage to actually talking about it as a serious option, but neither of us want to go into that with any doubt in our mind. So, I told her how I felt that trying other people out was definitely a good idea for the long run, but that I was also scared. She reassured me that she loves me & that nothing was going to happen & that this is just to make sure that we're right for each other, since we've got practically nothing to compare each other to. I completely believe her & trust her, but I'm terrified of the possibility that we may each come to a different conclusion. At the same time, I am also intrigued by the possibility of dating someone with different interests & experiencing that. \n\nBasically, &", "summary": "how do I rationalize how I want to feel (trusting & supportive of this idea, because it seems like the right thing to do) with how I actually feel (jealous, insecure, terrified). "}
{"id": "t3_wfcz0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My Ex-Husband Wants Me Back After I Have Found Another Man; Is He Genuine or No?", "post": "My Ex-Husband, whom is also a redditor as is my new boyfriend hence the new and anon-account, has been alluding to wanting to come back to our home. \n\nBack story; We have three children together, I own the house and he moved out after moving in with his GF in a messed up poly-experiment gone wrong. He told me that he was moving out via a phone call on his lunch break. He just stopped coming home except for the weekends when used the house to see the children until he got his own house. \n\nI am now un-employed and living on FS and CS (woo being a housewife and having your husband leave!) New boyfriend and I have been together for nearly a year and he moved in about a month ago. He is successful and now off of FS, yay! \n\nEx-husband sends random IM about a month ago lamenting about how if he came back he'd have to leave his GF. I said yeah that would be a requirement and some other snarky comments about how he'd have to be a real man and husband not a weekend father. I was obviously mad and we aren't exactly best friends any more even though we were together for 10 years and were prior to him leaving out of the blue. \n\nThen he asked me last week when I dropped off the kiddos he invited me in for dinner in front of the kids. I politely declined but that was awkward. \n\nThen I got a message from a friend, used to be mutual, and one of his co-workers saying he has been asking about me and wants to know if he should move back in with his family. \n\nI am so conflicted. I feel like I should and I am saying no for the right reasons but I don't know if it is the right decision.", "summary": "Ex-husband seems to be trying to get back in to my house and life. I have a new BF, WTF am I to do?"}
{"id": "t3_wnwo5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "If your apartment's management sells your building, are they required to give proper notice of transfer of lease?", "post": "My building got sold and all they gave notice is a note pinned to our door giving directions to start sending payment to them. I did not want to pay out any money until I got some sort of proof that they own the building; not unreasonable right? Well they finally have after about 2 and a half months but they are demanding I pay the late fees that have accrued during that time, roughly 5 dollars a day(5 a day plus 25 once a month), which adds up to be 250 dollars. My argument is that I will not just give out money to whoever pins a note on my door claiming to be the owner. I have tried contacting them several times and they did not get back to me properly. They finally dropped off the paperwork when the owner who lives in another state came to check out the building.  \nMore info:  \nThis is in Kansas  \nI hope this is an appropriate question for AskReddit if not please assist me in where I should point this towards.", "summary": "I believe my new management handled the transfer of ownership poorly and they are trying to get me to pay late fees during a time I had no proof they owned the building."}
{"id": "t3_3658y2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my friend/coworker [38 M] I'm interested, should I ask him out? Or will the age difference be a problem?", "post": "Hi /r/relationships!\n\nI have a coworker and friend that I'm developing feelings for. I'm considering asking him out to dinner or to hang out 1:1 but am generally concerned with the age difference. He may not even be interested ultimately, but I still want to think about this before I even really consider pursuing him.\n\nFirst off, we don't work very closely together. It's a large company, and are just starting to develop a stronger friendship as part of a small group.\n\nI'm concerned with our age difference(~14 years). I know everyone has their own beliefs, but I'm hoping you guys can help me see a perspective I might be missing. For context, we are at roughly the same place in our life- especially career wise. He was oversees for many years working as a missionary so he is a little behind, but still doing pretty well for himself. I, on the other hand, am slightly ahead of the game for a 23(almost 24) year old. We are both down-to-earth, level headed, and mature. He just has a great head on his shoulders, but still has tons of youthfulness and passion for life. \n\nPart of me says the age difference doesn't matter because of what I list above, but another part of me says there's got to be some kind of negative to dating someone much older. HELP!", "summary": "Want to ask out a coworker/friend, but am concerned about our 14 year age difference. Will it really be an issue, or am I over-thinking this?"}
{"id": "t3_l2vyx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Do you still need friends?", "post": "5 months shy of my 17th birthday, I met a senior at a party (a nerd gathering, to be honest) and we started chatting. We clicked. We had similar interests, but that didn't mean much--everyone at the party did, and I didn't get along with most of the people there. However, we had compatible worldviews; we didn't see things the same way, but we saw things similar enough to have interesting conversations. We quickly became friends; I hung out with him almost every day, but certainly 2 or 3 times a week. We quickly became best friends, and confided in each other about a lot--my losing my virginity, him worrying about getting an STD from his girlfriend, who got it from the 62 year old man she'd dated before him, our career plans, our understanding of the universe, etc. etc.\n\nAbout ten years later, I was the best man at his wedding in Hawaii. I even wore the fucking horribly uncomfortable shoes and stood in a hideous tux for hours while his parents took pictures. I did it because he was like a brother to me.\n\nWe're still friends, even if we live thousands of miles away. We still keep in touch, and I visit him every once in a while. However, I simply haven't made friends like him since. I've met people and gotten close to them, and I have really clicked with some of them. But I just don't feel that close personal connection that I used to, and I don't feel a need to connect with people like I used to.\n\nI don't know; maybe it's the internet. Maybe I'm just getting old. I'm happy with my wife and meeting people casually as I go through life. I just don't feel the need to have \"friends\" anymore.", "summary": "31, still have best friend from high school, don't care about making close friendships anymore. Am I the only person like this?"}
{"id": "t3_31rwhr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] and my girlfriend [23 F] of 6 years broke up a week ago. Can I text her?", "post": "My ex and I were high school sweethearts and dated all through university. She's the best friend I have ever had so i want to reddit's opinion on my texting her to see how she is doing. Our breakup was a mutual agreement that it is really hard to handle such a heavy relationship at our age, especially when we can't remember what life is like without each other. I have never been without her in my adult life. We have broken up a few times over the years, usually over the same reason we broke up this time. Despite all of our problems, she is family to me more than anyone else in the world. I'm not looking to get back together with her because i know that we aren't going to work out and love can't conquer all boundaries but can I maintain contact with her? or am I doomed to spiral out in a cycle of breaking/getting back together forever if i keep contact?", "summary": "My girlfriend/best friend of 6 years and I broke up. Can i keep contact/maintain our friendship without getting sucked back in to a relationship or getting hurt?"}
{"id": "t3_3mk03g", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going to homecoming", "post": "Happened few hours ago. Friend coerced me into going after I told her and another friend I wouldn't go repeatedly. Decided to go. Ended up spending most of the night wishing I hadn't gone. One friend ditched me because he wanted to go get someone to grind on him(no way in hell would it happen) and I am not about that. I don't really feel like having chicks I barely know rubbing up all over me. The other friend that I mostly went because of I barely saw and when I did it was to dance. Yeah dancing is terrible. Ended up getting vented to by a kid who's date left him for her boyfriend when they showed up. Pretty shitty night. Doesn't help when you have severe social anxiety and shut down in large social groups. I don't know, kind of just venting at this point.", "summary": "Went to homecoming because of a couple of friends, one abandoned me for lust, other one I didn't see all night. Ended up having kid cry about his date to me."}
{"id": "t3_oumq6", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Pulling leash \"heel\" problem", "post": "I know this question has been asked before, but I doubt people will be replying in threads that are 2 years old.\n\nI have a springer spaniel pup (about 10 months old).\n\nI've read a bit about dog's pulling on leash problems and I've gathered that if the dog pulls, stop, and the 'heel' command and wait for him to get by your side before praising and continuing to move.\n\nMy problem is that my dog just won't listen to me when we're outside, or on the leash at all for that matter. He's normally a pretty obedient dog inside and can do a good number of tricks like lie down, play dead, crawl, catch and the other basics. But when we're outside, he just won't listen to me, he pretends I don't exsist. When he pulls i say \"heel\" and wait for him to come by my side, gently tugging if he won't respond at all, then praise him when he's by my side again, the problem is the dog just sits ahead of me whilst keeping the tension on the leash. How do I actually get him to come back and sit at my side. I'm guessing most people won't approve of yanking the dog back to your side? Any tips for actually teaching the heel command? Oh and toys and treats won't work outside, he just doesn't seem to care about them anymore as soon as he steps outside.\n\nI should admit that this is only my 2nd/ or 3rd time trying this and i know that it takes patience, but I was just wandering if you guys had any tips?", "summary": "Trying \"heel\" method when walking dog to get him to stop pulling on leash, won't come back by my side with heel command, toys and treats won't work outside, any tips to get his attention?"}
{"id": "t3_3gdg9m", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to cheer up a friend after her apartment caught fire.", "post": "TIFU by trying to cheer up a friend after her apartment caught fire. Mandatory \"this wasn't today but a few years ago\"\n\nA good friend of mine's apartment had caught fire and they had lost most of their stuff and the apartment wasn't ever going to be livable again. So needless to say she was very upset and she already has depression as it is. So being the \"good\" friend I am I set to cheering her up as best I can. I realize there's only so much you can do for someone who just lost everything so we talk and I let her know I'm going to send her and her fiance some money to help them. I also think about how I can entertain her and distract her, even if just for a few minutes, from her situation. \n\nHere's the FU - I had just played through Portal 2 and there is a character named Cave Johnson. I thought him hilarious, and he has one particular rant about \"when life gives you lemons\" and I thought it quite fitting. So I pulled up a link to [Cave Johnson's Lemon speech] and sent it to her and began to watch it myself. At about 25 seconds ( she had started just about 5 seconds behind me) I remember what is coming next, Cave Johnson shouting \"I'M GONNA BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!\", and try my best to tell her \"WAIT WAIT PAUSE IT DON'T WATCH!\" too late... There was a long... looooong moment of silence. After which she teased me and called me a few names I won't mentioned here she began to laugh about the whole situation. We were on good terms still but I couldn't help but feeling like the worst kind of person in the world.", "summary": "Friend's apartment burnt down, rubbed salt in the wound by getting Cave Johnson tell her he was going to burn her house down with lemons."}
{"id": "t3_lnsj7", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Trying to find motivation..", "post": "So for a few years now, I've been wanting (needing) to lose weight, be healthy, change my life, etc. The problem is, that I can't seem to find a reason good enough to keep me going and motivated, or to even begin trying again. It's stupid, I know.\n\nHere's a little info/ background:\nAge:19\nHeight:5'1\"\nWeight: 150lbs\nBackground: Fought/ still fighting a couple health issues (severe migraines, GERD, acid reflux, delayed gastric emptying, the idea of fibromyalgia came up too). Constantly stressed either with school or trying to find a summer job/ internship, and I'm constantly fatigued (no matter what I do sleep wise, nothing helps).\n\nI'm 100% sure that getting to a more healthy weight and doing something with myself will make me feel tons better in probably every aspect of my life: confidence, become outgoing, be able to worry about/ concentrate on what I need to get done, etc. But with all these issues and a wicked fantastic boyfriend, one would think I'd have some motivation/ inspiration to get me started/ keep me going. Like, I'm starting to think I need to be humiliated or forced into this somehow, but that might not be a good idea in reality.\n\nBasically I'm looking for any help/ advice/ ideas that might help me with anything. I want to change my life, so bad, but I can't get myself to do it for whatever stupid reason and I've been trying for a few years now. :/", "summary": "have what would seem like enough reason to give me some kind of motivation/ inspiration, but can't get myself to attempt this lifestyle change (again)."}
{"id": "t3_1jgad0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[20M] with a girl [20F] hung out at Coney Island and stayed out till 2 am. Idk how she feels.", "post": "I used to live in NYC a couple years back but have moved around the past couple years but still visit NYC frequently to keep in touch with friends.\n\nSo this was Tuesday Night and I had plans set with this girl. We meet up on a local blvd in NYC and didnt have any plans. So I said we should go to Coney Island and she agreed to come with. We end up taking public transportation for 2 hrs to get to the destination.\n\nWe get to Coney Island and we look around, take pictures, and then we go on a couple rides. It's getting late the place starts to close so we grab something to eat before we go back to our town. We got food and I paid for this whole date while were eating she offers me to eat some of her food which sounded like she was comfortable with me.\n\nWe end up heading back towards the train station where I get stopped by a guy who is trying to make me win a stuffed animal for her, which I did. We end up leaving to go on the train around midnight and we dont get back in to town till 2 am. She calls her mom to pick her up at the subway stop and I ended up seeing someone I knew at 2 am in the morning stopping me from kissing the her at the end of the date. So instead we ended up giving each other a big hug. \n\nAt the end of the night we part ways, she texts me to get home safe and that she had a really good time. Its been a couple days and I text her as soon as I woke up today after not talking to her yesterday during my trip home. I told her Good morning and I missed her lots but haven't got a response.", "summary": "I knew this girl in high school, finally told her how I felt and she agreed to get to know each other more."}
{"id": "t3_gnhxy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Thinking of breaking up, need some advice", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been going out for over two years and we are both about to graduate college.  We both were able to find jobs (sigh of relief) but they are in different locations.  We are going to be about 100 miles apart.  Compared to other people, I know this sounds like nothing.  My problem is that I know I'm going to miss what we have right now and I don't think he is.  He considers being able to spend every night together and seeing each other everyday as a \"luxury\".  To me, this is a standard.  I think it's pretty normal for two people who are dating (and looking to get married one day) to spend every night together.  He acts as though he doesn't need me, and would be ok without me in his life.  This hurts, and I do not feel at all the same way.  We've had to do long distance over the summer, and he is not good at it.  He isn't a telephone conversation kind of guy, and when we try to skype, he's always playing games so I never have his attention.  I don't want to break up with him, but I feel like he doesn't appreciate me or our relationship.", "summary": "Boyfriend and I (2 years) will have to do long distance, he doesn't appreciate relationship, should i break up with him?"}
{"id": "t3_w5n12", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Having some conflict in deciding what to do with my best friend.", "post": "I've known this girl, I myself am 20 and she is 19, for quite some time now and we became friends very quickly. I've only recently begun to develop feelings for her, but it's been quite obvious to me for some time that she has had and now shares those feelings. I've really been trying to hide my feelings though because she; however, is in what her family, friends, and I call a terrible relationship. \n\nShe no longer has any guy friends left because they were all scared off by this guy and she's trying her hardest to keep the fact that she's been talking to and hanging out with me on the regular a secret because she's afraid that he'll harass me or try and hurt me. \n\nHer sister and I are also starting to get concerned that the relationship  might become physically abusive. I would like to specify that at this point it is only to the, best of my and her families knowledge, a verbally argumentative relationship, but she's told me it's been getting worse recently. And they have been dating for 6 months.\n\nI've never really been one to ask for advice, but I don't know if I should continue being passive and deal with the problems as they come or if I should just put myself out there? I'm just afraid if I do that I'll risk pushing her away and losing someone I consider to be my best friend. \n\nThat's my conflict, I just want to know what you think and if I should do anything at all, I know this is a rather small bit of information to go on so any advice at all would be helpful.\n\nThanks", "summary": "Developed feelings for best friend who has feelings for me, she's in an unhappy relationship, should I remain passive or tell her how I feel and risk losing a best friend?"}
{"id": "t3_2my3zc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [21 M] get over my bf's [23 M] past (mis)conducts?", "post": "We've been together for 17 months. It makes me very sad, and disappointed when I think about things he did in the past. Some examples are: \n\n1. Getting a lap dance at the strip club  \n2. Planning a whole weekend with a lady friend who's in town knowing she has feelings for him \n3. Not being over his ex and not willing to talk about it or make me feel secure that this isn't a problem (obviously, it is...)\n4. Complimenting other girls around me\n5. He doesn't try to help me finish, I feel sex is never about us - it ends when he's done mostly \n\nI could name a few more...but will refrain from.. \nWe have talked about these situations but they always end with him apologizing to solidify them, but not to assure me.\n\nI feel I deserve more and better. How do I healthily get over this if I want to continue the relationship?", "summary": "I'm still can't forgive my bf's for his past inconsiderate actions, how do I cope with this or is this not working?"}
{"id": "t3_1sve9o", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Going to a concert with two friends, but another friend of mine wants to go with us but doesn't get along with the other two. What should I tell him?", "post": "I am a 17 year old male and my two friends, lets call them Sam and John, are also 17. We are planning to meet up before the concert at Sam's house and hang out before we go. Another friend of mine, David, already bought a ticket to the concert and doesn't want to go alone, so I told him he could join the three us. The only thing is that David doesn't get along with Sam or John and vice versa. After realizing it wasn't such a good idea to invite him, I told David that it might be a better idea to go with his girlfriend, but apparently she wants him to go with his friends. \nI want to avoid any awkward situations. Should I tell David that he really should just go with his girlfriend or find another group of friends?", "summary": "Going to a concert with two friends. I told another friend he could come with us because he had no one else to go with. My original two friends and him don't get along."}
{"id": "t3_2vh0sy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Relationship] Me/BF [21 M] with my GF [22 F] 4 months with my female clone and she doesn't know anymore.", "post": "(Throw away because she's a redditor and a power user, might not work but oh well. Also it's kinda long)\n\nMe and her met on an online dating site and talked for a week and finally decided to go out and have dinner at this pretty nice/new italian restaurant downtown. Had a great time and was the best time I ever had in over 4 years (crippling depression and what not.) In short, me and her we're the exact same in every way in terms of interests. It's weird as if life finally gave me a break and said \"Hey I'm sorry about that, here's an amazing, loving girl with your brain, sorry about the past!\"\n\nWe did so much together in these (almost) 4 months and fell madly in love with each other. It was like some sloppily written cliche riddled romance movie. We never argued or had problems it seemed. This is where I'm lost and that rant before this is why I'm disbelief on why this is even happening. \n\nAnyway, previous to this morning we talked and saw each other all the time constantly since the first date. Sent her a text when I woke up, 4 hours go by and I text her again. This time shortly after all she said in a long message that \"I need time to think\" and that she doesn't \"know anymore and need's time\". She's never talked like this and it's so random. Normally that's an obvious red flag but it's just so strange and sudden after what was perfect. It make's no sense. Have I been punk'd? I don't understand where this is coming from.  She never did anything or said anything wrong and neither did I (I think?).", "summary": "Attractive female replica of me and I fall for what I thought was crazy in love and then she randomly doesn't know about us anymore. Probably obvious but random"}
{"id": "t3_123h65", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Got into a major university that I didn't apply for, should I accept it?", "post": "To give a little background, I just recently graduated from a small college on the East Coast. A few weeks ago, I got a letter from VCU notifying me that I need to turn in my transcripts in order to be considered for acceptance. I didn't think anything of it because I didn't apply. Got home from work today and got package in the mail from the same university letting me know I got accepted for the premed program. Not even close to being interested in it. It has all the paperwork you would get if you had gotten accepted from this university. \n\nI am contemplating on accepting it but calling and saying that I am not  interested in that specific program and if I can just switch to another. I've lived in that house for over 8 years so there is most certainly nobody else by that name lived there especially with the same middle name. I live in a pretty small neighborhood so there's nobody around me that would have the same name as me as well. It is addressed to my address as well.\n\nI just don't want to get in trouble for fraud or something.", "summary": "A major university sent me an acceptance package and I didn't even apply. Contemplating on accepting it but fearing consequences never being the same and going to jail."}
{"id": "t3_1h5goo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[25/F] struggling to trust after being dumped by [27/M] boyfriend of 8 years", "post": "In April, my boyfriend of eight years broke up with me telling me that the only reason he had stayed with me for the past year was because it was convenient to have me around since I cleaned, cooked, etc. and that he didn't want to get married (at that point, he was the person I was planning on the spending the rest of my life with). Since then he has been contacting me and saying he didn't mean it and he wants to get back together and get married. After hearing his original comments I've refused to go back to him and have no intention of doing so.\n\nHowever his comments really hurt me and I feel has damaged my ability to trust my friends and family. I'm the person who shows up to a party with fresh baked cookies, the person who pops up with soup when you're feeling ill, etc. I know in the back of my mind that my friends are my friends because they value me as me, but I'm afraid they see me as someone convenient and useful and not an actual proper friend. Since I wasn't able to pick up on my ex-boyfriend being unhappy for the past year (as far as he told me and I could tell, everything was wonderful until he broke up with me), I'm afraid I can't tell if other people are lying too.\n\nIt has made it difficult for me to open up and share with my friends and family and I hate myself for treating them all suspiciously. I was asked out on a date a few weeks ago and the guy is a complete sweetheart, but I'm still terrified. How can I conquer my fear and treat my friends, family, and potential significant others the way they should be treated?", "summary": "My ex-boyfriend said he was keeping me around because I was convenient and not because he loved me, this has stained my interactions with my friends and family."}
{"id": "t3_10cxes", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend(19) is considering having a guy as a roommate. I(19) am concerned she'll be tempted to cheat on me. How should I approach this?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for over two years. We started dating senior year of high school and since then have had a colorful relationship. We're now at the same university but living in separate apartments. She has one roommate who a close friend but she's looking for a second. Today she told me she found one, however it would be a guy. This makes me extremely uncomfortable because she has left me for someone else once before and I feel given the opportunity she may do it again. I've told her politely that I was uncomfortable with the situation but she doesn't seem to care. How should I approach this if she goes through with it? Anyone have some advice?", "summary": "2 year girlfriend(19) looking for a second roommate and is considering a guy. I asked her to reconsider but she may still let him move in. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_ameih", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, according to a doctor I went to \"a joint a day is worse than a pack a day\" is he right?", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nI recently went to a doc (not my usual guy, but someone I've seen before) and I mentioned that I had been using marijuana to get rid of my headaches, and help relax myself after work (I really get stressed out easily)\n\nHe went on to say that he does not like it personally, but that he was going to give me a medical opinion as thats what I came for. He then proceeded to say \"A joint a day is worse than a pack a day\". He said the long term effects outway the short term fixes and that I should instead look to something more like a prescription pain med (IE: T3's).\n\nI'm fairly against taking pain meds as I feel they just don't seem natural, and really make me feel groggy in general. I have an appointment to see my actual doctor next week but I figured I should get some studying in first.\n\nI've read around in the past and found myself believing that marijuana really isn't bad for you, and the only thing it can (and does) cause is short term memory loss (although I haven't smoked in a few days and feel like I'm getting better at remembering things)\n\nSo, in short, can Reddit give me an unbias opinion on the short and long term effects of marijuana use? (please don't use things like \"YOUR DOCTOR IS AN IDIOT! LOL, HERE READ THIS!\").\n\nThanks in advance!", "summary": "Doctor said marijuana once a day is worse than a pack of cigarettes a day, suggests I use something more along the lines of a prescription pain medication. Need more info on short/long term marijuana effects without bias or douchism."}
{"id": "t3_y4cfo", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Historians and Reddit detectives, can you help me figure out the mystery of the number on my Hungarian Great-Grandmother's arm?", "post": "I hope you can help me, Reddit detectives. My great grandmother Marika was born in 1903 just outside of Budapest, Hungary. In 1921, she came to the US via Ellis Island. Sometime between 1903 and 1921, she received a number on her arm. My mother likens it to the numbers received by people at Auschwitz, and she believes it was about 6 digits, and tattooed on her right forearm. It was quite large, perhaps four inches, and written in the elbow-to-wrist direction, as far as my mom remembers. The numbers were sloppy, again similar to those used during the Holocaust. \n\nUnfortunately that's all I know. My days of probing and inquiring came down to soldiers in the area got numbers for identification, but she was not any type of soldier or involved in the military. She refused to speak of the numbers even if asked directly, and no one had a clue where they came from.\n\nOther details: she worked on a farm her entire life, and was the oldest of eight, four born before immigrating to the US, no other siblings had a number. The family was not jewish - I know there is a history of jewish oppression in this region, but my family was Christian.  \n\nCan any historians or even Hungarians of Reddit help me out?", "summary": "Great-grandmother from Hungary had a number on her arm acquired in Hungary between 1903 and 1921 that she refused to talk about; can anyone help tell me where it came from?"}
{"id": "t3_365vpc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20m] can't seem to get rid of my ex-friends[20sM/F] from my life after my former suicide attempts", "post": "I can't seem to get rid of several people I've basically cut out from my life after an issue that's been ongoing for the past couple of years.I'm a junior in uni,\nand freshman and sophomore year I tried to kill myself after being with depression for the better part of my entire life. I failed with both attempts, and after\nthe second I basically gave up on the idea of killing myself so I just kinda live and go to school. \n\nWell, it's approaching the end of junior year and my ex-friends have been getting fairly intrusive in my life. I figured out why a couple of weeks ago, and I told them very plainly sent them a mass text that told them that I was\nfine and they needed to drop it. They ignored my wishes and kept trying to interact with me. About 2 weeks ago I told them that I was done, and I didn't want to see them\never again. I said some nasty shit but it seemed to work and most of them gave up at the time. \n\nFast forward to now, and the same shit has started up again. They're texting and messaging like we're still friends and nothing ever happened. Most people would be like \"cool,\nmy friends listened it's ok now\", but what they did just irritated me even more. I invited over the defacto coordinator of my friends to tell her to butt out. I forgot that I was\nin the process of moving and she noticed, she asked, and I slipped and said I was moving. Now I can't get them from subtley trying to ascertain where I'm moving too.\n\nShould I just block them and ignore them? It's hard for me to just ignore blatant ignorances, but would it be better? I want them to understand that I don't want to deal with them,\nand it's not some plea for attention.", "summary": "My now ex-friends won't leave me alone and I can't decide what the hell I want to do in whether to just get rid of them completely from my life or to continue to try"}
{"id": "t3_1o55wx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my GF [26 F] of 2-months is gaining weight, after we already had a weight loss conversation.", "post": "We were seeing each other casually for a couple weeks.  She sat me down and said she wanted to get serious and date exclusively.  We talked about her leading a healthy lifestyle and exercising more if we are going to get serious.  She agreed to make some changes to her diet and starting walking again.   \n\nThat was two months ago.  Since then, she eats the same and hasn't exercised.  She was probably 40-lbs overweight when we started dating.  She's probably gained 10 more lbs.  I haven't said anything to her, or even implied a thing about her choices.  She's really sensitive.\n\nNow I feel trapped.  Should I call her out on it?", "summary": "casual gf wanted to get serious and promised to make an effort to get in shape, since then we've been dating exclusively but she gaining weight."}
{"id": "t3_266n3j", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by rolling out my hip flexor", "post": "so I play a lot of sports mostly ultimate frisbee, and i recently injured my hip, more specifically, my hip flexor. apparently, this is a common injury for ultimate players, so my coach told me to take some ibuprofen, then stretch it out by using a hard ball of some kind and to put it on the floor. then i would have to put my body weight onto it right where my hip flexor was, then roll it out, however he didn't tell me how ridiculous i would look, so when i actually did it, it looked like i was humping/grinding the ground.\n\ntoday i decided to roll it out; i grabbed a baseball, went upstairs to the guest room, put some headphones in and started doing my thing. since i was getting a bit bored, i started browsing 9gag in attempts to find something entertaining (i know.. i know.. i should have gone on reddit instead). everything was cool until i was loading a gif of a girl doing something stupid, then i feel a kick to my side. I look up and to my horror, it's my dad and he literally has the weirdest look on his face. he doesn't say a word to me, and just leaves the room.", "summary": "my dad walked in on me stretching out my hip on the ground while i was looking at a picture of a girl on my phone and now he thinks i was humping the ground whilst staring at my phone"}
{"id": "t3_2jef1c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21m] think I'm developing strong feelings for a good friend [20f]. How can I put a stop to them?", "post": "I have a friend, we'll call her Britney. Britney is a fantastic person who has been going through a hard time. Guy trouble, school trouble, drugs, depression.\n\nI've kind of been her support as best I can through this. Her other way of dealing with it involved sleeping around. Which normally? Couldn't care less, right? Her life, her business. But I can't help but feel a little hurt when she tells me about her latest...exploits.\n\nThere are times when I feel she could have a thing for me, but they pass quickly as she starts talking about the next hot guy she plans on going for. She's also described to me previously her \"ideal guy\". Almost none of what she described could be used to describe me. So it's obvious she doesn't feel the way I do.", "summary": "Britney's a great friend. She's smart, gorgeous, and crazy fun. I have feelings for her that I need to kick, fast, for fear of losing our friendship. How do I go about doing so?"}
{"id": "t3_3gdpai", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "(CAN) How screwed am I?", "post": "So back in April I financed a new car, spent roughly 40k on it and what not. Come into May and I lost my job, and now I have no way to afford the payments that I have. The day after I lost my job I contacted my bank and told them the situation and what not. \nFast forward to today, still jobless, I've only been able to pay them a few hundred towards the growing debt (roughly $2000 IIRC), but I look outside and my car is gone. Both sets of keys are here with me in my house, I have an alarm system on my car so I know it wasn't stolen and judging by the stack of letters from them saying action will be taken I assume it has been repo'd. \nI live in Alberta, and I guess I'm asking what there is to do in my situation.", "summary": "Bought a car, got laid off, couldn't afford payments, car got repo'd. Looking for advice on what I can do from here, or rather what I should do."}
{"id": "t3_2fylui", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The girl I'm crushing on [16F] seemed out of it while talking to me [16M] today, and I don't know if I should talk to her about it.", "post": "Just a little background first.We've been flirting on and off for about 2 years now, and I definitely still have feelings for her. I think she's getting closer this time though, we talk on facebook or text every night and also at school if in more laid back classes. We stay up talking online until the early morning, and that's usually when we talk about deeper stuff.\n\nToday (a weekday) we were chatting and she seemed her happy and funny self at first, but then kind of got distant and used one word answers etc. Then she said suddenly \"im just gonna go see you tomorrow\". She never acts like that, and I know she didnt have a bad day. I kind of want to ask her if she's okay, but I don't know if that will annoy her or something. I could also be overthinking things, and it's just *that time* or something like that. Should I talk to her about it later/tomorrow?", "summary": "Me and her usually talk every day, but she grew distant and unenthusiastic today, and I don't know if I should talk to her about it later."}
{"id": "t3_1zysyi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (18/F) don't want my SO (18/M) to go on a trip where he will meet his ex.", "post": "Hey Reddit. \nSo I have been dating this boy for roughly 2 months now, and things were going well between us. Every summer he travels with his friends from school (I don't know them since we were in different schools and met in college) and visits various places. This summer he'll be travelling with them again and exploring Europe for 2-3 months. Which is completely fine by me, under normal circumstances. \n\nHowever this summer, his ex girlfriend will also be a part of the group of friends he'll be travelling with. They dated in high school and were together for nearly 2 years, and he admits that they really liked each other a lot and it took him a while to get over her. As much as I hate to be dramatic and give ultimatums so early on in our relationship, I really don't think I'll be able to handle him seeing her and being near her over a period of 2 months. 2 months is a really long time and a lot can happen and I don't think I will be able to handle the doubts and insecurities I will feel during that time. \n\nI thought about this a lot, and I really don't want him to go on this trip Reddit. I really don't. I don't know if my stand is justified or not, or if I am merely over reacting. Help me out guys?", "summary": "Boyfriend goes for a trip every summer, this year he will meet his ex girlfriend and spend nearly 2 months with her and his other friends. I don't want this. Please give me some sound advice."}
{"id": "t3_2cmx9z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25F] lied to my boyrfriend [29M] of 1 year and 3 months about going out with a coworker [M] and now he won't talk to me.", "post": "I have been hanging out with a working friend [M] for the past few weeks outside of work. We hit it off at a mutual friend's party and since then, we've hung out on occasion like going out for drinks after work (just once).\n\nThe other day, there was a free concert by a local park and I invite him out to come join us (my other co-worker and her date). It kind of ends up being a double date although nothing awkward happened. I had told my boyfriend to come out with us but he decided to stay home and make dinner. I ended up staying out later than I thought I would and he's been waiting for me. At this point I feel like a total jerk. We end up having an argument and he expressed feelings of jealousy (a side I had never seen before). We talked it over and everything seemed fine.\n\nAbout a week after this event, my co-worker invites me to a movie with his friends. I lied about this to my boyfriend and told him I went out with a friend [F] instead. I had a few drinks and and later that night it slips out that I lied to him. My boyfriend keeps quiet about it until the next day. I had intentions to tell him but I couldn't find the words to say it. He brings it up first and now he is extremely upset at me, especially now that I didn't have the courage to tell him first.\n\nI have no feelings for my coworker. He is just a friend that I am getting to know better. I thought it was better to lie so my boyfriend wouldn't get jealous since he got upset the last time I went out my coworker. I was obviously wrong and made a bad choice.  \n\nMy boyfriend and I have had a few bumps in the road but we've moved past them, but this is the first I have ever lied to him. I feel terrible about it. I need some advice on how to gain his trust back. What should I do?", "summary": "I lied about going out with a coworker [M] to my boyrfriend. He found out before I could tell him and nw he wont speak to me. I need to advise, please."}
{"id": "t3_w720m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, how do I start friendships with other girls?", "post": "Alright, I've lurked on the site awhile and I've seen that it has an awesome ability to help people, thanks to an awesome community. That being said, we'll see. I am an eighteen year old girl.\n\nSome background, I had four best friends in junior high, all of which were girls. High school came around, the grew closer, I kinda of drifted away, mostly because I had a long term boyfriend at the time. Now I'm graduated. I haven't had a comfortable conversation with a girl in...a very long time. I got out of an abusive relationship a few months ago and have had no one to depend on. Except for guys. So I'm talking to guy after guy, figuring out slowly they're all the same. (I know that's not actually true, but they all tend to act the same way around me.) I've driven guys off because I've been too dependent on them because that's how I became with my ex-boyfriend.\n\nMy problem is that it is almost impossible for me not to be overly dependent on my boyfriend because I have no friends. No girl friends to be exact. I wish so badly that I could just talk to them, but I don't think they really get me. I'm too weird. I really do not know how to approach girls or how to start friendships. I just don't get it.", "summary": "I am lonely and too dependent on my boyfriend because I don't know how to reach out to other females. I don't really know how to make friends.*"}
{"id": "t3_2253ob", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do you know when to give a second (or 4th) chance? Me 23F, him 29M, broken up for 6 months, please help", "post": "Hi r/relationships.\n\nIf this is the wrong subreddit please point me in the right direction. I don't know what to do anymore.\n\nAllan* and I broke up 6 months ago, shortly before he was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. We were together 2 years, living together and had a cat. I know everything that happened isn't his fault, but how do you move past it??\n\nA few months ago I asked him to get back together, he was so drunk he didn't remember the next morning, and I think at that moment something in me broke again. I tried for so long to make things work, and felt like that was the last straw. After a month of NC, I ask to visit him (was in the same city) and he wants to get back together, but he wouldn't even tell me how he was feeling! I tried to have a conversation about my fears, but it went nowhere. I've gotten to a point where I can't deal with my emotions so I just push them away and now basically I feel hollow inside.\n\nHow am I supposed to decide something like this when he won't even talk to me?? I feel like i've never had a connection so strong with someone, and honestly I don't know if I ever will again. It's been 6 months and I feel the same about him, but I can't put myself through it unless I knew it was going to be different.\n\nIf I should just walk away, how am I supposed to deal with losing who I thought was the love of my life?? How will I ever feel like that about someone else??\n\nAny words of advice would be deeply appreciated, I feel so lost. Sorry if it's jumbled, I can't even process my own thoughts.", "summary": "How do you deal with an ex wanting to get back together when you tried EVERYTHING to make it work and nothing worked?"}
{"id": "t3_4vsu22", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] want to take a long trip alone, best friend [23F] wants to come.", "post": "Throwaway cause she knows my account. \nI'll start by saying I am a very introverted person that is constantly surrounded by people. I work in HR and have 3 roommates and rarely get a moment to breath. So I recently got a chance to take a lengthy vacation, and I want to use it to take a cross-country road trip I've wanted for a long time. My plan is for it to take around 3 months, I'll be stopping at several national parks, big cities, and visiting my brother. \nThe issue here is that I told my best friend about it and she has assumed that I want her to come as well, since she's recently graduated and this would be a good time for her. While I love my best friend, this is defeating the purpose of the trip. Best friend is extremely extroverted, does not understand the concept of wanting to do something alone. She's also rather princessy, and would likely complain about a lot of the hikes/nature things I have planned. I wanted to pack my dog up and go, and enjoy some peace and quiet for once in my life. I know that 3-months in each other's faces would probably cause a fight, and that's the last thing I want to deal with on this trip. Is there a way I can tell her this is something I want to do alone, or should I just bring her and hope for the best? Would I regret going alone and halfway through, wish I had some company?", "summary": "Planning a long trip to go on alone with my dog, best friend wants to come, I don't want her to. What now."}
{"id": "t3_3u9e7o", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by looking behind a decommissioned server", "post": "This happened about 20 minutes ago and immediately after it happened I thought.. I had to share this with you guys.\n\nSo let me set the scene for you:   I was working on removing some old server equipment from the back of one our lab areas to make room for some new equipment and one of the machines seemed to be stuck and unwilling to budge.  I being the dutiful IT engineer that I am, I began trying to figure out what was obstructing it from moving as it should. Shortly after beginning this endeavor, I decided to look back behind the server casing to see if it was mounted to the wall anywhere.\n\nHere is where my fuck up begins,\n\nIts quite well against the wall and simply pressing my face up against the wall to see it wasn't working because of the safety glasses,  so I take them off because what is going to get in my eyes with my head pressed against the wall to see what was behind the server.\n\nAs I get my face into position, I flash the light behind and that's when it happens.   A spider, big, black, ugly, and FAST, basically the 2015 poster spider for NOPE NOPE NOPE quarterly,  runs at me before I can react and runs ON my eyeball... I pulled my head back in shock and to get away but it was already on my face and I ended up bashing my head on the rack behind me and basically flipping out in front of my colleagues for seemingly no apparent reason.  \n\nthe moral of the story here children is always wear your safety glasses....", "summary": "= looked behind an old server, spider ran across my eyeball,  flipped out in front of coworkers.  Never found the spider.. may have to burn my eye to purify myself of the spiders presence..."}
{"id": "t3_2x2okn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30/M] worried about my gf [30/F] going to Bali with her single friend [30/F] for four days.", "post": "When my gf goes on trips with her married friends, I am not worried much because they most likely to pursue low energy activities.\n\nHowever, this is the first time my gf is going with a single friend and this girl loves to mess around. She will definitely want to go to a bar or a local club to hook up and I am afraid that my gf will be drawn into this environment, especially when she is drunk, she becomes uncontrollable and does not remember anything the day after (even when getting drunk with me).\n\nWhat else is she going to do? Just sit and watch?\n\nAre these kind of thoughts irrational? What should I do?", "summary": "Gf going on a trip with a friend that sleeps around and I am afraid she will be drawn into that hook up environment. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_op3f3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What have been your worst moments of impotent rage?", "post": "First, this morning I'm at my dentist, and I'm told that my insurance isn't going to cover the installation of an implant I'm getting, because I switched jobs (and therefore insurance providers) between the time they removed the broken tooth and put in the implant base, and now when they need to put the actual cap in. That makes it a pre-existing condition so far as they're concerned, so it's not covered. \n\nThen I go to my bank to try to understand why not one, but two of my credit cards were declined at dinner on Monday. Their explanation \"Well, sir, you haven't used your credit card since October, so it was flagged as possibly stolen, then you go to spend $480 on dinner, so we assumed it was fraud and deactivated your cards.\" to which I responded \"So you're telling me that first you thought my card was stolen, but you didn't tell me about it, then you thought it was being used fraudulently so you deactivated both of my cards, but didn't bother to call me to say 'Hey, we think something is fishy'?\" \n\nSo yeah,", "summary": "first my insurance says that having a tooth removed counts as \"pre-existing\" and my bank apparently disables my credit cards to protect me from fraud, but doesn't bother to tell me that they suspect fraud."}
{"id": "t3_27srta", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [33 M] was divorced by my Wife [32 F] of seven years. I was always faithful, but never quit the military for her.", "post": "I understand why she did.  I've been in the Army for 14 years.  I've been deployed five times (51 months total) she just couldn't take it and quit on me.  I've always been faithful to her.  Im pretty sure cheated on me a couple of times before she divorced me.  I could tell she was looking for outs.  I'm at a point in my career now that if I quit its basically like turning my back on more than a million dollars.  I think the damage is already done.   She has moved on, she is dating good guys, that are good for her.  I'm having a really rough time moving on.  I think about her a lot.  I know i call too much.  I've tried dating, but for some reason i feel like the biggest creep in the entire world.  The women that do date me seem pretty excited by my online profile but fairly disgusted by me in real life.  I think i'm giving out the most desperate vibe on the planet.", "summary": "I didn't give up my stupid career for my family and now i have no family. How do i move on?  "}
{"id": "t3_162fz4", "subreddit": "Cooking", "title": "First time cooking a Ribeye.", "post": "Hi all,\n\nFirst time caller, long time listener here. I bought a steak yesterday as part of my New Years resolution to learn more about cooking. Now, I know there are a hundred posts on here about how to cook a steak. The searing, the flipping, the finishing off in the oven, etc. I've read through a lot of them, however I've decided it to be a better idea for me to reach out for some more specific advice. \n\nI plan on cooking the steak this evening. It's a beautifully marbled 1.25\" - 1.5\" cut of boneless ribeye. I don't believe it was dry-aged. I was planning on going out this morning to purchase a Lodge 12\" Cast Iron Skillet to cook in seeing as they are pre-seasoned, but after a bit of research, it seems only right to re-season the pan. The problem with this is that the process would take hours and I may not have that kind of time. My other option is a run-of-the-mill 12\" frying pan with a plastic handle, which leaves the option of finishing the steak off in the oven out unless I want melted cookware.\n\nAs for the rest of the process, I plan on letting the steak come to room temp for about 40 - 60 min before salting and I've decided on salting immediately before searing. As far as the sear goes, I have vegetable oil and I have unsealed butter. I like the idea of cooking the steak in oil and finishing it off in butter a la Chef Ramsey, although I'm still up in the air on the flipping method. To flip once or constantly, that is the question! After much research and it being my first time with such a nice cut of meat, I'm leaning more towards the flip every 15 - 20 secs as opposed to 1 flip. The reason is that since I'm unfamiliar with cooking a steak of this proportion, I will be better able to gauge cook time and achieve a more even sear, since I'm not positive on how long to cook on each side with the one flip method.\n\nSo fellow redditors, what advice do you have for me? Any and all is welcomed. Thanks!", "summary": "First time cooking a ribeye steak, 1.25\" - 1.5\" thick on stove top. Looking for advice."}
{"id": "t3_1klwqo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm[22M] falling for my friend's girlfriend while I slowly watch their relationship fall apart. Any advice?", "post": "Almost a year ago, I went to visit my good friend who was away at school. There was a big party and I met this girl, and we hit it off. The only thing is, one of my best friends also hit it off with her. He had just gotten out of a really shitty relationship, and as much as I liked this girl, I let him have this one.\n\nFast-forward to about a month ago. I'm jobless and my dad is a dick, so he waited until I got laid off to kick me out. So now, I'm homeless and jobless at 22. Guess who takes me in? My friend and his girlfriend.\n\nNow, I knew they were having issues, but I had no idea how fucked up and abusive my friend was being. He constantly treats her like she's second class, puts her down, completely disregards anything she has to say and when she sticks up for herself or argues back he has no problem getting physical. I would've never expected this type of bullshit from him, and he's never even come close to treating another human being like this, let alone a girlfriend\n\nThe worst part is, this girl is absolutely amazing. She has the sweetest smile and is probably the most kind, caring person in the fucking world. Over the coarse of their relationship, her and I became good friends and very close and I get to hear all of the bullshit my friend pulls. I get the 1 am Facebook messages saying how he wants to break up with her. The next morning its like nothing happened and I look like a jackass for sticking up for her. \n\nI need advice Reddit, on what to say to them, and what to do in this situation. Any help would be appreciated", "summary": "I need advice on what to do as I'm falling for my friend's girlfriend while they're slowly falling apart, and I get a front row seat"}
{"id": "t3_2yvz81", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] broke up with my Girlfriend [23F]", "post": "Tonight I broke up with my Girlfriend of 3 years because of several issues between us. We were very much in love with some big fights along the way but in the end I planned on marrying her eventually.\n\nI have been going through a lot of issues with my family and eventually problems with her because of the way she's acted toward me. While in the past she was extremely supportive and was prepared to give an arm and a leg to make things ok with any problems I've had in my life, she is now extremely annoyed,quick tempered, and basically tells me tough shit like I'm some inconvenience to her.\n\nShe has been acting completely different and was beyond cold to me and any issues I had, for Example : Whenever I would tell her the way she's acting towards me is hurting me and is harsh she would completely shut down and threaten me with things like, \"I'm done talking to you\" or \"you're pissing me off. Stop making an issue out of nothing.\" \n\nShe would essentially punish me for feeling sad and kick me when I'm down and basically turn back to previous arguments and imply that i deserve it because my actions have consequences and I acted similar at times in our relationship. Which is true, I was a jerk for a period of time a year or two back. But I didn't think that justified anyone acting that way.\n\n I felt it was extremely manipulative but I didn't do anything about it because I thought maybe it was a phase or things would be ok or she would snap out of it. Eventually it got extremely bad to the point of me having panic attacks and just being outright anxious over talking to her about me even feeling ill or sad. With nobody there to help me I knew I needed to get out and clear my head. \n\nBut I don't know what to do. I loved her so much and would want nothing more than to go back to the way things were before. But with the way things are it seems impossible. She doesn't seem like the same person at all. I want to move on but I don't know if it's the right thing or if I'm just praying for the impossible", "summary": "Broke up with girlfriend over issues between us. Not sure how I should move on or if that's even the right decision"}
{"id": "t3_12trse", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [24] and I [22] are having issues about cleaning.", "post": "We have been together 2 years and living together a little less than 1 year.\n\nThe main issue we are having about the cleaning is that I have higher standards than he does. However, I feel like what I am asking from him is more than fair and he should be able to make a few small changes to his behavior.\n\nWhen we moved in together, I told him I would take care of the actual cleaning (dusting, vaccuuming, laundry etc.) as long as he would maintain throughout the week and not make messes that had to be picked up first when its time to clean. I made this agreement because of my previously mentioned higher standards and because I tend to like things being done \"my way\". Plus he usually works on saturday and I get bored anyways.\n\n Basically my expectations are that he put dirty clothes in the basket, throw away his trash instead of leaving it on the table, wipe up spills, and help out if I ask... I feel like this is pretty basic stuff, especially since he is home more often than I am. It takes me longer to clean if I have to round up dirty socks from every corner and throw away a weeks worth of soda cans first. It makes me feel taken for granted, unappreciated, and occasionally like the dreaded \"replacement mom\"\n\nI've discussed this with him before and he says he doesn't really care how clean our place is, doesn't think about it, and he's just a messy person and this is how he is. That last part about him just being messy is the thing that really pisses me off because I think I have asked for very reasonable things and it makes it sound like he's unwilling to change. To his credit he has gotten a little better (last apartment he had was a disaster) but there's still room for improvement and thats all I'm asking for.\n\nSo /r/relationships my questions are 1. I think I'm being reasonable, am I? 2. How can we work together to solve this? Yesterday when we argued again I suggested doing a daily pick up before bed, what else can we do?", "summary": "typical living together issues where I have higher standards of cleanliness. I would like him to stop leaving little messes around, how can I communicate that better and what are your suggestions for improving this problem?"}
{"id": "t3_x0i7l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "give up hope, reddit?", "post": "Backstory: I was dating this wonderful woman for about 6 months. We would talk everyday for hours on the phone and hang out weekly, etc. My impression was things were getting to serious and she got scared and ended things. Told me she had \"intimacy issues\" and wanted to be friends. Shes blunt so she told me she usually says that to guys to soften the blow but genuinely meant it with me since we became close enough to consider each other best friends. Well whatever.\n\nIssue: we hung out for the first time (actually second but I don't count the first time) in like 3 months celebrating my recent acceptance to grad school where she is partial reason why I applied. It was a fantastic time. I went in with the mentality of not to expect anything so I wouldn't be disappointed. We hung out until the bar closed. She took me to a park and we sat and talked about life until about 3 or 4am. Got to her house sat in her car and talked some more until about 6. I walked her to her and she asked to come all the way to my place to sleep over. We didn't do anything luckily plus I was exhausted since I was up for 24 hrs straight. Drove her home when we woke up.\n\nSummary: I'm ecstatic that our friendship is established and we can genuinely be in each others company without arguing or discussing \"us\" every convo. However, it's been a week and we haven't talked. I try not to think too much into it but why would she do that knowing I still have feelings for her? I accepted the fact that we prob won't have a future together and I'm fine but I still have that little hope in the back of my mind. The more time passes the more I give up hope. Should I give up on things ever being the same? Is it safe to say fate has something else in store for me? Thanks for hearing me out...", "summary": "I met the \"perfect girl\" everything was going good, then it ended because of her \"intimacy issues\". She slept over 3 months after breakup and disappeared again, should i give up hope for a future?"}
{"id": "t3_2angt1", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Can I fight for my Pay on my Promotion?", "post": "I'm here to cover my bases because my personal research did not bear fruit. I work at a customer service center in Minnesota. Recently (May 2014) I was promoted to a supervisory position. The position came with a  $.50 raise which I was happy with. There was an error in my promotion documentation with management and it was never properly processed until the first pay period of July for us (I had brought it up after two pay periods from my promotion). When I brought it up a second time to my own manager (picture office space), they informed me on the date in my file that my promotion was listed. It was listed as (June 17th). So the higher up I spoke to, put in my promotion date on some random day, and I have not seen a cent of back pay. My fellow supervisors are telling me to fight for back pay, but I dont want to lose my job and I work in a place that has a strong undertone of \"Fear the Higher-ups for your job's safety\".\n\nI'm tired of being a spineless drone. I dont want to do this for the money. I dont want to do this to make waves or be \"that guy\". I want to do this because I feel it is right. I want to know what I can do to have things fixed because I do not believe I should fear my employer and when majority of my co-workers both below and above me in rank are telling me to make this a \"Do or Die\" situation, I need to know my options.", "summary": "version - I got promoted in May. Project Manager marked it as Mid June. I'm not getting back pay for what I worked. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4m4uqa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [33 M] ex-girlfriend [30 F] is demanding a gift back that she gave me", "post": "We were officially together for about 6 months but on and off \"dated\" for probably 6 months beforehand as well.\n\nShe gave me a framed picture of the Seattle skyline for my birthday last year. It's a pretty cool picture and I have it hung in my entry way. We broke up a few months ago, and she said she'd come by at some point to pick up the stuff she left at my house. The stuff consists of some random articles of clothing, some board games, and some bobble heads. I have no problem returning these to her. However, she is demanding that I give back the picture which I don't think she has the right to do. At this point, I almost want to just keep it for the principle of the thing. \n\nSo we were not very civilly discussing this today, and I told her if she wants the picture back, then I'll drill a hole through the middle of it and put it in her bag of stuff. She then threatened that if I do that, she will call the police.\n\nOne: Does she have any case with the police? That picture has been hanging in my house for months. \n\nTwo: Should I just bite the bullet and give it back? I feel like that just validates her threats.", "summary": "Ex wants a gift she gave me back. I don't want to give it back because it was a gift. She wants to involve the police. Should I give it back? It's a really cool picture."}
{"id": "t3_3a3yp2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22M] girlfriend's [22F] parents gave me a check for graduation and I'm not sure what to do", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year and her parents have known me for about the same amount of time. This past weekend, we both graduated together from the same major in college. Yesterday, when I went to see my girlfriend again, she handed me an envelope and said that her parents told her to give it to me. Inside was a card congratulating me on graduating, as well as a check for $50.\n\nNow I know this isn't some large amount, but I'm not sure how to react when I see her parents. My girlfriend doesn't know what to do either. Should I take the money or would it be considered rude to give back? If I should take it, how should I thank them? What do I say?\n\nThis is my first relationship so I really have no clue and no experience with something like this. Help me, Reddit!", "summary": "I received a check from my girlfriend's parents for graduating and I'm not sure how appropriate it is to accept it."}
{"id": "t3_2m8qof", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 F] with my BF [22 M] of 7 months, how to deal with possible ADD/anxiety issues", "post": "My boyfriend had a rough childhood. His parents split when he was about 5. His mom suffered from mental/sexual abuse from her father, causing her to be not as nurturing to him. And my boyfriend's dad started drinking heavily following the divorce. He still lives with his dad (clean now) and stepmom but isn't as close with his mom (sees her every month or so). From what he's told me he was a troublemaker when he was younger, wasn't diagnosed with ADHD but most likely had it.\n\nAnyway, down to the main point of this- my boyfriend has a lot of issues now. I love him, but lately there's been a couple setbacks. He's a great boyfriend, it's just what he does to himself...that also affects me. Like getting fired from his job for being late (he quickly found a new one, but still). Or dropping a class (he's still in school, I graduated in May and have a full-time job now) because he wasn't doing well in it. Or getting nostalgic and sad while drinking in his hometown and DRIVING.\n\nI worry about him, and our future, because of his decisions.\n\nHe's been to a psychiatrist before. Him and I have both researched and are pretty sure he has adult ADD, anxiety, depression, I don't know... \n\nI just want someone to reassure me that he can get help and get his life together before it ends up destroying our relationship. I can't constantly be worrying about him when we're not together. Or someone to let me know how I can deal with it and help him.", "summary": "Boyfriend had a rough childhood, has a lot of issues with anxiety lately, possibly ADD, lost job, dropped a class, drinking"}
{"id": "t3_2z5z13", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my BF [25M] of 2.5 years, we've lived together since before we started dating. Feel like it might be a good idea to live apart for a while", "post": "I've been dating my BF for about 2.5 years, and we've basically lived together since right before we started dating. We both have a year left in school after this Spring (he's getting his MS, I'm getting my BS) and after that we are both going to look for somewhere to live, probably in a different state than both our families and all of our friends. I posted previously about some issues we're having in our relationship, and now I'm at a point where I think it would be a good idea to step back and really evaluate if this is both what we want. \n\nI brought up the idea of living apart about a week ago, and he didn't really respond. He says it sounds like a break up and shuts down. To be perfectly honest, our relationship has soured a bit lately and that may end up happening. But I want the relationship to work and I see living apart as the best thing to do before we have to make the huge decision of moving together next year, assuming we're together by then. The reason I want to live apart is because I feel like we've both grown around this relationship rather than independently, and I need to look at our relationship and myself from a different perspective. I'm hopeful, but doubtful as well. \n\nI'm not sure how to approach this with him again, but I'd like to sooner rather than later. Any guidance would be appreciated.", "summary": "Lived with my BF since before we started dating. Think that living apart for our last year of school is the best thing for our relationship at this point. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_wspvd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend about to break up. What to do?", "post": "[18 yo]I've been in a 6 months long distance relationship with my girlfriend[17 yo], and now when she came home (for good), I'm pretty certain she is going to break up with me. The reason why I think so is because she said we need to talk, and it would be better if we met somewhere in town, instead of me just coming over to her place. \nNow, our relationship is a bit weird because I never really got to know her well before she went to spain for 6 months. We have kept in touch almost everyday, and I've tried my best to stay in touch with her, but that has been through facebook and texts. Whenever she was back in town, it was weird for us to see each other again, so we both acted a bit weird and distant towards each other. That always wore off when we got used seeing each other, but as soon as that happened she had to go again.\n\nShe came home 2 weeks ago, and we've only been able to meet once. And just like before, it was weird seeing her again. I still act a bit distant around her, but I try my best not to. She probably wants to break up, because she might have lost boyfriend feeling towards me, that it doesn't feel like we're a couple anymore, and that we've grown apart. But I know that if we can just get used to each other and get to know to each other better, it will be all different. I really love this girl. Everything about her is so imperfectly perfect. I really want this relationship to work, and I know it will if we gave it a try.\n\nWhat can I say to her to make her re-evaluate our relationship and not just put an end to it? I'm bad with words, so hopefully someone on here can help. Thanks.\n\nAnd sorry for being all over the place. Again, I'm bad with words.", "summary": "I think my girlfriend is going to break up with me, because we act distant towards each other after a long-distance relationship. What to do/say?"}
{"id": "t3_1orybq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[16/M] In love with girl [17/F] but she's older, I don't have an opportunity to speak to her and don't know how she feels about me", "post": "Sorry the title was long, this might be to. It's a kind of specific situation that I'm not sure how to approach. I work part time a fast food place, usually at the back preparing food while she works at the front serving customers. Because of this there is literally no chance or time for us to talk. However a few people left from the front so I trained up there with her today for 2 hours. \n\nIt went fine, we laughed and chatted, got to know each other a bit and we were both smiling a lot. However I'm not sure if I'm working at the front after this so that might have been my only chance to talk to her - ever. I've wanted to get to know her ever since she started, she has such a cute smile is has always been friendly whenever our paths have crossed but now I don't know what to do. I learned today that she's a year older than me (she's 17) and going to uni next year. I can't stop thinking about her and I don't know what to do. She was so nice to me but I might never see her again plus if she's older than me is that weird? I mean where do I go from here? She's clever, we have a similar personality and I really really like her, a lot but I don't know how she feels about me. I've only spoke to her for 2 hours just... what do I do?\n\nSorry if this was kind of a vent I just really need some advice, what the hell do I do? I think I'm fucking in love with her. I'd really love some advice here.", "summary": "In love with a girl at work who is a year older, I've only spoke to for two hours and may never have the chance to talk to her again, what do I do now? Where do I go from here? "}
{"id": "t3_45qndx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A Guy [20sM] from uni has started sending me [22F] harassing messages again, what can I do?", "post": "Hey everyone!\n\nI will try and keep this concise. Basically, there was a guy who, when I was at uni, wrote some really horrible comments about wishing the tutors would get cancer, etc. I told him that it was a horrible thing to say (silly me, rising to the trolls), and then he started harassing me, calling me horrific things. It got to the point where I reported him to the university and they forced him to apologise. It was all forgotten about until recently (when we had both finished the course), I had another load of messages from him, being generally insulting and saying that he hoped I would get cancer. Nothing that he has said is threatening/illegal, I just think its pretty horrific behaviour. A friend of mine confided in me that the guy used to stalk him and has admitted to being schizophrenic. Is there anything I can do about this? It's not really worthy of reporting to the police but he has done similar things to other people and I don't think he should be able to do so unchallenged. Maybe a letter to his current university?\n\nThanks in advance for any advice :)", "summary": "A guy from uni was harassing me a while back. He stopped when he was made to apologise. Now we have both finish the course, he has started again. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2vn74c", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by calling a dwarf very little", "post": "On an early morning, I was walking my little brother to school, it was pretty hot, a temperature of about 33 degrees Celsius for the morning.\nAs we were walking along a footpath, we were getting closer towards the school. This school has 2 entrances down a side street or a quicker walk up the hill.\n\nHe suggested that we take side street because it was hot but then I suggested let's just go up the hill. As we we're walking around the corner to cross the road, I then murmured It's very little. Just as I said that a dwarf walked around the corner and gave me the biggest death stare of my life. I didn't even notice\n\nMy face went bright red, my intention of the word It's very little, was in regards to the hill, but anyway we keep walking and I felt a little embarrassed. I dropped him off at the school and then I begin to walk home. Guess who's waiting at the bus stop? The dwarf. \n\nAs I walked past him, he again gave me the biggest death stare, I felt like stopping and explaining what I meant, but instead I thought stuff it I'll keep walking and won't say anything.\n\nI feel like a c*nt.", "summary": "Walked past a dwarf and said it's very little, he gave me a death stare that I won't forget, I actually meant in regards to the hill, and we then crossed paths minutes after to receive another stare."}
{"id": "t3_rd3uu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's your Jeopardy anecdote?  I'll start...", "post": "Trebek's making his way down the line making small talk with the other contestants.  You're next.  What do you say?\n\nHere's mine: I was travelling in Germany a few years ago and took part in a pub crawl in Berlin.  We were warned ahead of time not to make too much noise on the U-bahn (subway, metro, underground, whatever), presumably because they had received complaints.  Being the sneaky Canadian devil that I am, I decided to take advantage of the sizeable complement of Aussies on the crawl to cause some ruckus.  I started singing the first few lines of \"Waltzing Matilda\" under my breath and within 10 seconds most of the train was singing the anthem at full volume.", "summary": "I (a Canadian) led an entire subway train in a rousing rendition of Australia's unofficial national anthem in Berlin."}
{"id": "t3_2h2kvf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with my GF [26 F] of 3.5 years broke up 3 weeks back.Just wondering, will I eventually just stop caring about her and stop thinking about her all together?", "post": "I won't go into too much details. We were madly(atleast I was) in love with each other, but due to some circumstances we ended up breaking up. The love was very real and at many levels we were closely connected. Although we both had been in a relationship previously, we both were each other's first love and for both of us this was the first meaningful relationship and she was definitely my first real love.\n\nHowever we ended up having very nasty breakup and we haven't been in touch in anyway or form since then. We might never ever talk to or contact each other in our entire lives.\nBlocked from WhatsApp,FB, Email and all. No way to contact her except by  going to her home which won't happen.\n\nCurrently I think about her all the time. The end was bitter, the everything before it was like a beautiful dream. It's been three weeks , so the pain is real and heartache quite strong. She haunts my dreams and I sometime feel so lonely without her that I end up hugging walls and crying.\n\nYet, today I'm think about her a *little* than I was 3 weeks back. I can get through 30-40% of my day without thinking about her at all.\nIt was 0 -5% percent 3 weeks back.\n\nI'm just wondering that maybe in few years I can attain a state where I can go through days or perhaps even months without thinking about her at all. That the pain of losing her would only hurt me once in a few months.\n\nPeople who've been through nasty breakup or still regret losing your first real love, I would love to read your inputs.", "summary": "First love; nasty breakup. Currently I think about her a lot, but will this reduce over time. Can I finally go through a day without thinking about her at all."}
{"id": "t3_ltbxo", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Did I get played?", "post": "I'm 20(M) and she's 18(F). Yeah, young I know. I've known this girl for about a month and a half.\n\nI'm in the second year of my program, and recently met a first year student who was cute, nice, and overall just awesome. Long story short, I fell for her. Problem was is that she has a boyfriend, but he's an asshole. Super big asshole, like they should already be broken up asshole. And it wasn't just the whole \"I like her and wish she was single\" POV, this guy is a grade A douche.\n\nThe way she talks to me though, it's like she was single. She always wanted to hang out, was flirty, and always seemed like she wanted to see me. Asked me to buy her things, asking me for rides. She even told me about her relationship troubles, which is how I came to the conclusion and BF is a douche. Other people thought she might've had a thing for me, hell even our teachers did.\n\nSo I did what any sound minded gentleman would do, I told her about it. She invited me over to her place after I got off work cause she wanted to hang out for a bit before her party(which I also got invited to, but declined.) I told her I felt like she played me, that it was like I was being used. She has a boyfriend, so why act like she didn't?\n\nShe felt guilty, and cried. She texted me a couple hours later saying that she's appalled I would even think she was using me, so maybe I was wrong. But I have noooo idea. HEEEEELP.", "summary": "Met a girl, she had asshole BF, talked and acted to me like she didn't. Felt I was being used, told her, made her cry, she felt genuinely guilty."}
{"id": "t3_3gqvf6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18/M] planned to go on vacation with friends for a week, but my parents won't let me. What next?", "post": "Couple of my friends were planning on going to a holiday for a week and they asked me if I am 100% certain and I kept saying yes. My dad is supportive but mom is really scary about everything and kept saying no but then she said I'll think about it. \n\nSo yesterday I had to tell one of the friends that was organizing the thing if I'm 100% confirmed, but that \"i'll think about it\" turned out to be a no. She just spills reason after reason after reason for me not to go and it pisses me off. I had to tell the guy i probably wont make it and he sounded as disappointing as me. I am pissed off because i feel embarrassed, everybody is letting the other guys go but not me. Sure they are one or two years older but its not that big of a difference. And now if I am not going the group will be probably smaller than expected because couple of other guys also can't make it due to different reasons. I kept telling my self I will go to this no matter what, and I probably can despite moms will but I know this will make things worse and I will basically be coming home to a battlefield if it happens. \n\nI am so stressed and pissed off right now I feel like breaking everything around me. I am certainty not going to be talking to my mother for the foreseeable future. I'm just thinking what to tell the other guys who plan on going (if they are even gonna be going, because as I said a lot of people backed out and with me too I dont know whats gonna happen) so I don't look like a fool. Any thoughts and advice is welcome.", "summary": "friends plan to go on holiday, no problems with their parents, but my protective mother wont let me - me embarrassed mad and dissapointed"}
{"id": "t3_1lysxm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My sister [15F] has recently been dumped by her boyfriend [17M] and she can't get over him.", "post": "I apologize for any mistakes I make due to the fact that this is my first post and I have no idea what I'm doing. Please let me know how I could improve.\n---\nMy sister got dumped by her boyfriend about 3-4 weeks ago. They  were only dating for roughly 4 months but she really liked this guy and apparently this guy really liked her (her friends were always going on about the way he looked at her and stuff).\n\nAnyways, he broke up with her due to the fact that they have no classes together and he would only see her in the morning, at lunch, after school, and on the weekends. She believes that he has found another girl and that this is just a cop out. He said that the love was still there and I think that gave her hope that they would get back together but I don't think that's going to happen.\n\nI keep getting off topic. She is trying to get over him and another guy asked her out but she didn't want to say yes but she did anyways because she would've felt bad had she said no. Now everytime she does something with him she is always comparring him to her ex. She goes on about how it doesn't feel the same and she does'nt get \"butterflies\" or nervous around him like she did with her ex.\n\nShe's still friends with her ex and texts him and her best friend is dating his best friend so she sees him almost everyday.\n\nSo, what can I do to help her get over her ex?\n\n---\n\nSorry if the text is long", "summary": "My sisters boyfriend broke up with her and she can't get over him even though she has a new boyfriend and I was wondering how I could help her get over him."}
{"id": "t3_1k7rnz", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Need help,[24M] trying to convince a crush [23F] to go out with me.", "post": "So quick back story I met this girl through a work friend while we were out at a club we frequent. One night me and her (both a little plastered) begin to make out and fool around. That was it, we just teased each other, exchanged numbers and she went home with her friends. We started talking the next day about what had happened but she had figured out that I was a friend of one of her exes. They apparantly dated and broke up weeks before I moved to town and I had no idea. She says this is a reason why she doesn't want to date me cause she doesn't want to be considered a \"homie hopper.\" I told her I understand but lately the past few weeks we've been talking more and more, the past few days we were hanging out at my place a lot. We cuddled on the couch and when we went to bed. We'll hold hands as we walk and while I'm driving. She seems to be giving the signs of she's into me and we're totally compatable but still: no more kissing, no dating. \n\nWhat should I do reddit? Do I wait it out? Quit while I'm ahead?", "summary": "I'm trying to convince my crush who dated a somewhat friend of mine to go out with me but, she doesn't want to cause she doesn't want to be considered a \"homie hopper.\""}
{"id": "t3_4z899o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with guy I hooked up with [30M] is trying to reconnect again", "post": "I met this guy off reddit a while back. We connected great, and did a few things together for 3 weeks or so before we decided to meet up. We basically hooked up the first time we met, which was surprising because there was no sexual tension between us at all.\n\nFast forward, a week or so. He suddenly stopped replying to me and is ignoring me off of everything. I confronted him, asking whats the deal, that I at least deserved a explanation. He told me that before he met me, he had a deep connection with this other woman, and that it wasn't fair that he was going to keep on going with both of us. So we ended there. \n\nFast forward 2 months, he texted me out of the blue asking about my life. I straight up told him that he hurt my feelings and I felt like I was used. He said he never meant for that to happen (red flag I know) and that he was the dumb one to use me as a placeholder (super red flag). Hes listing a lot of reasons in any ways we could possibly be friends again, eg. just becoming gaming pals, Skype pals or whatever. He seems sincere about it. \n\nNow I have no intention of forming any kind of relationship beyond a friendship with him. But I was wondering if it's even wise to become friends with him again? I know I wont get sexually involved again but is he someone to trust, and will he even become a \"good friend\" in the long run?", "summary": "Guy I hooked up with started to reconnect with me after straight up dumping me. Nows finding excuses for me to forgive him, should I?"}
{"id": "t3_2wjrot", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18m] have been with my gf [17f] for 10months, she just told me she doesn't love me anymore", "post": "It just happened like 2 hours ago and I'm still in shock as I'm typing this. A little bit background:\n\nWe have been together for 10 months and in the first let's say 6 months everything went perfectly. Then little problems arised, nothing big and we never had a big fight or something, I think it's pretty normal that after the honey moon phase you notice little things about the other one.. However in the last 2 weeks I often complained to her that she doesn't have enough time for me (something that bugged me since many months, but she has a really tight schedule with school etc. so I was actually pretty okay with it.)\n\nHowever today I went over to her place and after a little bit of talking and having fun we had sex and it was like always, both me and she were really into it and after finishing we cuddled. After around 30minutes of cuddling she starts crying and I was pretty confused and when she finally could speak again she told me that she doesn't have feelings for me anymore since a couple of days.\n\nI was in shock and didn't know what to say, I didn't realize what was happening ... Now I'm sitting at home thinking about what to do now... She told me she doesn't wanna talk about it today and wants me to wait until tomorrow.. I don't really wanna talk to anybody I know about it since I'm not really sure if it's over .. normally I would talk to my parents but they just broke up on monday .. so that's not really an option right now.\n\nI'm not really sure what to do now .. I don't want to give her up.", "summary": "gf of 10months just told me she doesn't have feelings for me anymore but doesn't want to talk about it until tomorrow"}
{"id": "t3_wxppj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's a song that made a normal situation  awkward, for you?", "post": "About 2 years ago I was in a shopping centre with friends. After trudging about all day, going in and out of every shop multiple times, I need the toilet.\n\nExcusing myself from the group, I quickly went up the escalator behind 2 fairly well-built men. The kind with muscles that make the t-shirt arms taught. At the top I followed them into the toilet, so far it was just a normal toilet trip, nothing to fear.\n\nIn the toilets there's 3 urinals, they proceeded to occupy the end 2 urinals, leaving the middle open. I saw this and thought, \"Fuck it, I'll do a 17 times table and not get stage fright.\" It is then that I realise music is playing, I tune in. Humming the tune, I know this! One of the other men starts whistling the tune of the chorus, before the song has got there. I start piecing it together, but I can't name the song. \n\nI began my stream, confident that I'd just pulled into a parking bay and got over stage fright before it began. Then, the chorus begins; Elton John - Are You Ready For Love?, it got tense, and a silence filled the public toilets. No-one knew where too look, a couple of people were blushing as this was not a song to be played in the mans toilets.\n\nI finished up pretty quick, splashed my hands with clean water and made a quick escape. Possibly the first time a song ever made a normal situation awkward. I'm still paranoid about toilets playing this song.", "summary": "Pissing in a public loo between 2 well-built guys. Elton John - Are You Ready For Love, begins to play. Awkward atmosphere."}
{"id": "t3_5240wp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] my girlfriend [24 F] wants me to move in with her, but it is all my fault.", "post": "I will tell you all the story with details, she was married when I met her. Now she is divorced and she is my gf, the problem is that she can't live anymore with her husband, but she is not from here and she has nowehere to go, so I came with the stupid idea of renting a house together with another couple that are friends of mine. So she started working so we can afford the place and all the other things. The problem is the time has come, the other couple is already living there and my gf wants us to move now.\n\nBut now I feel like I am not ready, Im just 21 and still studying and having a part time job, but I dont earn enough in order to live comfortably with her. My family has money and loves me so much, and Im going against their ideals because Im moving too fast, all my other cousins didnt moved untill they were married and had a good job. \n\nI dont want all my family to see me bad, I can still provide her the money for the rent, but if I live there I will lose a lot of time in commute to school and work, and where I live right now with my parents is very close to both.\n\nThis week I told her that I can gave her the money for the rent and stay there with them on weekends, but she refused because I already promised that I will live with her. She has no one here in this city, 0 family. She started crying and I told her its ok, I will move with her.\n\nAnd now again Im afraid, I made a promise and I dont want her to feel sad, but I dont know what to do, she wants to live with me because I promised, but now I dont feel ready and feel like such an idiot for playing with her feelings, also my mom is crying because im leaving the house :c\n\nI desperately need your advice, thanks in advance.", "summary": "I promised my gf that I will move with her but now some problems have araised and I feel like Im not ready, and I feel like I am betraying my family that gave me everything I needed."}
{"id": "t3_1qpubd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [22F] have an issue with my SO's [25M] drinking; I think he's got a problem", "post": "This has been a long standing issue. I trust him completely... outside of his drinking habits. It's the only thing he'll break his word on, and he does it repeatedly.\n\nLast night, he bought a six pack. That I'm fine with. Just before I served up dinner however, he wanted to go back there, and buy a bottle of whiskey. He said he wanted it for tomorrow night, when he planned to see a friend.\n\nHe promised one more drink, that's all. I wake up this morning, and there's half a bottle of whiskey gone.\n\nI feel betrayed every time this happens, and I don't know what to do. If I bring it up with him, he gets defensive and claims I'm asking him never to drink again, and that's not fair.", "summary": "My SO has an unhealthy relationship with alcohol - leading him to break my trust repeatedly - and I don't know what to do about it."}
{"id": "t3_1t4ewm", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "my girlfriend (18f) isnt returning to school next semester. i (18m) was happy for her originally but now i cant come to terms with the situation.", "post": "I just completed my first semester at college and did very well-- all As and Bs. I should be really happy for myself but Im not. im stuck thinking about how my girlfriend isnt coming back.\n\nbefore i was happy for her. with a crazy, troubled past shes finally ready to open herself up and seek treatment to deal with the emotional scars shes suffered. but now i feel really alone.\n\ntowards the end of the semester there was essentially a huge fall out between my girlfriend and our group of friends. i decided to take my girlfriends side and havent talked to anyone in our friend group in the last 3 weeks.\n\ni dont know what im gonna do when i go back. i dont know who is gonna be there for me or if im gonna wanna make new friends. i am a funny happy-go-lucky guy but recently ive just felt down and alone. i plan on flying out in january to see her but i just hate the whole situation.\n\nthere was a trust incident right before my girlfriend and i became official--she hooked up with a guy at a party back home-- and im just sick to my stomach right now that shes gonna do it again. i know shes sorry for what she did and she promised she would never hurt me again but i just dont know if i can believe it.\n\nit just seems like i have had a lot on my plate and i dont know what to do. my mom and i think i should transfer to a school closer to home after the year. i dont think my girlfriend and i could make it work if that happens.\n\nany thoughts would be appreciated. thanks.", "summary": "my girlfriend isnt coming back 2nd semester because shes getting treatment for emotional scars. i was happy. now im sad and alone."}
{"id": "t3_3fip53", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 F] is a confused pickle as she doesn't know [20 M] likes me or just being a good friend?", "post": "*i'm posting this on a throwaway account due to the fact my main account(stupidity) is the same user as My Skype name*\n\nI've been talking to a guy for a year and he's honestly one of the closet friends I've ever had, we talk about pretty much anything and everything(also 9 times out of 10,\nwe Skype pretty much everyday for 3\nhours) however I'm so confused how he feels so for me. He says he doesn't like anyone yet he always compliments me all the time and he said to one of his friends that the only reason why he's in college is due to the fact that I motivated him and he's doing it for me. He's also compared me to some of his female crushes. \n\nThe confusing part of it all as we got on the topic of relationships and he said that he never wants to have a girlfriend meaning he can't like me however I get that vibe if you feel me?? I joke around saying \"oh course you love me, who doesn't love me\" but like how do i spot out if he likes me or not? I know it's clich\u00e9 however I'm so confused, how do I spot if this boy likes me or not?", "summary": "how do I spot if this boy likes me or not as he says he doesn't want a girlfriend but I get the feeling he may like me? Or is he just being a good friend?"}
{"id": "t3_3hlgr0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my boyfriend [23M] of 3 years, he's traveling overseas without me and I'm FOMOing hard", "post": "Throwaway because my boyfriend knows my regular username. So my boyfriend and I have been talking about moving to Germany in a few years and traveling across Europe together (we both live in the U.S.). The company he works for is a Germany-based company, so he has always had hopes of being able to travel there for work. He recently got the news that he will be traveling to Germany, Wales, and London in a month for two weeks through his work. \n\nI am ecstatic for him because I know how badly he has wanted to travel there, but I can't help but have a little FOMO (fear of missing out) because I wanted to experience Europe together for the first time when we went. Now he will be going to many places we wanted to visit without me, so it won't be as much of a new experience for the both of us when we go. \n\nAlso, he will be traveling during the time I had planned a very long tattoo appointment which he promised to attend with me so I could have someone's hand to squeeze. Now I have to find someone else to commit to sitting with me for 6 hours while I get tattooed :/\n\nAny advice on how to shake this FOMO I'm feeling would be greatly appreciated. As I previously stated, I am more than excited and happy for him because I know he has wanted to go to Europe more than anything. I just wish we could have experienced it together for the first time.", "summary": "Boyfriend will be traveling to Germany, London, and Wales for two weeks for business while I'm wishing I could be experiencing those countries for the first time with him."}
{"id": "t3_lv9d8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can Reddit help me give my girlfriend the best gift ever?", "post": "Hey Reddit, doing this a day early just in case it doesn't work! My girlfriend and I usually celebrate the anniversary of when we started dating(Nov.1st) with a nice dinner and a gift. Money is limited since I returned to school this september so no fancy gift.\n\nI know that there is nothing she loves more then when people listen to her band's music or add her band on facebook.\n\nIf she got  bunch of views and comments she would be on cloud 9 for the day. Can Reddit help me make this happen?\n\nGive a few tracks a listen, and only if you really like it leave a comment!\n\nWatch a video:\n\nCheck out the site!\nwww.unbuttonedmusic.com\nBecome a Fan!", "summary": "Want to get my girlfriend some recognition for her musical talent for our anniversary, because i have no money for a fancy gift!"}
{"id": "t3_4twnjz", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I wish I handled it differently", "post": "**[ Warning: Long Text ]**\n\nI broke up with my ex of 1.5 years of relationship. I went through some hurdles but after 1 month prior to the breakup, I am somehow relieved and accepted the breakup in a positive light. I'm really sorry if it is a lot to read after this.\n\n\u00a0\n\u00a0\n\nHowever, I asked for his assistance (exactly 1 week ago) which ended up going into his room during late night. He was fixing my tablet which I need to use the day after. I was really exhausted and somehow dozed while sitting on his couch. He woke me up and offered me to take a nap on the bed with him. That's where the sex started. He initiated everything and for some reason I let him. I accepted that part of it is my fault.\n\n\u00a0\n\nThe day after, I told him the tablet was causing me problems and I gave it to him without going into his room. He returned it hours later and said \"this will be the last time we'll see each other.\" I tried my best to reply in a friendly manner despite the fact that I feel like there is a gaping hole inside. Then I blocked him everywhere after my casual goodbye.\n\n\u00a0\n\nWhy. I never understand how a guy like him can just have sex as if you really wanted the person and act like none of that crap matters. I felt stupid falling for it. But he is not the type of guy who would sleep with women willy nilly. I know he had sex with his ex a long time ago but never with people whom he is not in a relationship with. \n\n\u00a0\n\nNow I'm back to square 1... It was painful because I was fine for a month and ended up not being fine again. \n\nCan anyone explain about why your ex would just sleep with you and act indifferent afterwards? And any advice would be appreciated.", "summary": "Broke up with my ex of 1.5 years, met up with him after 1 month and had sex. He acts indifferent the day after. I tried my best to act casual and blocked him everywhere."}
{"id": "t3_2weqop", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being a cave man", "post": "This FU actually happened today! (Well, since it's past midnight where I live it was technically yesterday but I don't consider it \"tomorrow\" until 6 or 7 in the morning because it's more convenient.)\n\nThere's this girl who I've had my eye on for quite some time now. We talk quite a bit and sit together in communication class, etc. but she doesn't know I like her.\n\nSo today (or yesterday), I left my dorm and went through the frigid cold and snow to go to the dining hall. After getting my fill of shitty college food and a lethal dose of Mr. Pibb, I started the not so long journey across the frozen tundra that is outside.\n\nThe way the dining hall is set up, it's between two (crappy) dorm buildings and it's attached to them for the convenience of the unlucky students who have to live there. The girl I like just so happens to live in the dorm in question.\n\nAs I'm about to round a corner to get to the exit, I feel the Pibb gurgling in my stomach as it prepared for a burp. Me being the ancestor of the extremely intelligent cave man, I decide to let the burp out. It's only natural, right? I let out a ferocious burp that was quite loud and lasted a good 3 seconds, all while going around the corner.\n\nRight in front of me is the girl who I fancy, standing with a couple of her friends, wide eyed and somewhat shocked (not sure if it was the loudness/length of the burp that shocked her or the fact that I did it in public).\n\nAt first I didn't notice it was her because her hair was different. Then she awkwardly waved and quietly said hey to me. I too said hey in an awkward way and continued on my journey, laughing like a mad man on the inside.\n\nNeedless to say, I probably won't get a shot at dating her. Ever.", "summary": "Went to eat at dining hall. Drank a bunch of Mr. Pibb. Loudly burped while going around a corner. Girl that I like just happened to be around the corner."}
{"id": "t3_1vwnsy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My friends just asked me[19F] to go with them to South Padre for spring break. They specifically asked my boyfriend[20M] not to come because they don't have the space.", "post": "Like I said, my friends asked me to go to South Padre with them. They already have everything paid for and they need one more person to go. They don't have room for my boyfriend to go, so that's why they haven't invited him. \nI really want to go!! For years I've wanted a Spring Break to unwind and relax and I haven't been able to go because my other friends never saved up the money to go.\nThese friends aren't my best friends, they're a group of friends I used to hangout with in High School. One of my ex boyfriends from when I was 16 will be there in the group. I've been assured that i won't be staying with him and that I won't be riding with him in the car on the way there. \nI don't know how my boyfriend is going to react to me asking him. He's a pretty jealous person, especially over my exes.", "summary": "I guess my question is: Would you be okay with your girlfriend going to South Padre alone with a group of her friends, including her ex boyfriend?"}
{"id": "t3_302nqn", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "File for Bankruptcy or wait for Disability?", "post": "I am in Pennsylvania\n\nI am asking for some advice as to if I should File Bankruptcy Chapter 7 which would Eliminate all my unsecured debt totaling about 12k or wait for my disability to kick in. I was recently employed with Apple until an unfortunate series of unexplained events caused my colon to be removed and my spine to be reconstructed. \n\nI have had no income since my short term ran out in May 2014 surviving solely on what I had saved and what my father can provide just to keep me eating. I will not be able to work until all my surgeries are finished and I have NO clue when my disability will be approved by the state. But I will have backpay from Summer of 2014. I was told it could be about a year or two before my case has settled, but I am getting ready to be sued by my creditors. I have no assets so I am not sure what they can do, but I am kind of stuck in a rutt. I will be married in May of this year, my fiance has been paying for the wedding since I am stuck in a hospital bed most of the day, and shes been working as a waitress. I do not want to bring my mistakes into her life, as much as she says it is okay. I would like to have them paid off or wiped away before then. \n\nI am currently on Medicaid and Food stamps so that is helping tons. But I am getting deeper and deeper into trouble with the debts I owe. I lost my car to the bank in January and my apartment last fall. I have a 2 year old daughter who I could not even buy christmas presents for and this whole ordeal is starting to go to my head and really putting me down. Ive become extremely depressed since my Surgeries and have had some pretty bad mental breakdowns having my life change so drastically. \n\nI just would like some honest advice on what I should do now. I dont know I am not sure what else I can do.", "summary": "Had Colon removed and Spine Surgery. Am now disabled with no income. Need help on whether to file bankruptcy or wait for Disability for who knows how long."}
{"id": "t3_12crgt", "subreddit": "running", "title": "On Sunday, I turned 35 and PR'd on a 10k in the cold, pouring rain. The achievement felt good, but the run was brutal. Do faster paces get easier?", "post": "Since the summer, when I started going to the gym warming up for weightlifting with 10-12 minute hard runs on the treadmill, I've seen my average pace go from 7:00/km down to between 6:10 and 6:20. On sunday, perhaps because it was frigid and pissing rain, I gave her as hard as I ever have over a prolonged period and finished the James Run 10k in Peterborough Ontario with a 59:22-- a hell of a drop since my last 10k, which I ran in 1:08.\n\nThing is, I've always really enjoyed the hypnotic pleasure of long runs, which I've tended to do at a far easier pace (I ran a half in May in 2:23, 6:45/km). I don't get ANY of that pleasure when I'm running faster. Rather, I spend every second thinking about how much time I have left to run, and practically counting the seconds until I'm done.\n\nThose of you who've improved your pace, do you find this gets better? Do you find it easier just to stride into a nice 15k at your new speed without feeling yourself ground down by it? I can't imagine running 15k at 5:57/km, while doing it at 7:00/km is virtually my definition of pleasure.", "summary": "I really want to enjoy running faster, but it seems like the faster I go, the less pleasure I get from the run."}
{"id": "t3_lb1fv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Got screwed over for over $200 and need revenge ideas!!!", "post": "So here is the quick version. I had extra tickets to a concert and decided to sell them online. Two were for face value and two were for below face value. But both parties agreed they wanted my tickets and they were going to meet me at the concert to swap monies for the tickets. So I get to the concert and I send them both a txt to let them know I've arrived and where to meet me. The first chick replies saying they waited too long and they just ended up buying from scalpers!!! I couldn't believe it, those ungratefull bitches! I could have sold the tickets to someone else instead of turning them away saying they were already taken! Which leads me to the other girl who said she wanted two tickets. She didn't even have the decency to reply to my txt/email/phone call. Just straight up ignored me! But she did send me an email two minutes before I arrived at the concert asking me if I was still going to show. To which I replied to her email and sent her a txt! But no reply! \n\nSo what I was left with was 4 tickets for no one and short over $200. However, I do have their names, emails and cell numbers. Time for a bit of payback! Now I'm not looking to get my money, I just want to teach these little bitches a lesson on not screwing over normal folk just because they feel like it! Help me figure out some good ideas on how to get back at these girls!", "summary": "got screwed out of $200 and now want payback, have names/emails/cell numbers. Need ideas."}
{"id": "t3_47d3kl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (26F) and guy I'm dating (34M) for a month, he constantly hangs out with a girl he slept with recently", "post": "I made this a new post but if you look at my post history, you'll see that it's kind of an ongoing issue. The backstory is that I'm dating a guy with two young kids, his marriage ended around three months ago and he has slept around a fair bit since then. \n\nWe had agreed to be \"exclusive\" and I had asked him to delete tinder off his phone and he did. But I know that he slept with at least one of the women who he hangs around with regularly since his divorce. Like they were friends beforehand, then the divorce happened and they slept together, and now they are hanging out \"just as friends.\" I don't think he's lying but it makes me uneasy. I work nights most of the time so I'll hang out at his house until like 10PM, and then he'll tell me this girl is coming over after I leave.  It's hard not to worry because he is obviously attracted to her (since they slept together). I told him that it makes me uncomfortable but he says they're just friends, so I don't want to nag him about it anymore, I hate being that type of person. \n\nBesides that everything has been going really good for us. Dating him is like a dream come true and we're having a lot of fun together. He has child care now so we've been able to go on a couple actual dates and they've gone great. We talk about what we want in the future and our plans line up. \n\nOne other potential red flag is he doesn't want to tell his family and friends that he's dating. He's worried they will go off on him for it being too soon after his separation. He doesn't treat us being together like a big secret, like we still go out in public and everything but it still makes me feel weird.", "summary": "guy I'm dating is always hanging out with a girl he slept with really recently, I told him it makes me uncomfortable but he just brushes it off"}
{"id": "t3_qvz60", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I become a better listener and better conversationalist in general?", "post": "Hey fellas!  I've been lurking/randomly posting here on Reddit for the past couple weeks and I'm thoroughly impressed with the quality of responses that the community provides!  Sooo... I've decided to post something I've been having difficulty with.\n\nI'm 24 years old and have never been in an intimate relationship with anyone and have always struggled with my how to interact with people on the personal level.  Things are getting better and I've actually had some success with the ladies! (first kiss at 22, ftw!).  I'm an avid weight lifter, have a good career ahead of me, and am now beginning to dive into the world of classy fashion (goal this year is to get a bespoke suit).  I believe that the general public finds me attractive and that I'm perceived as \"easily approachable\" and friendly.  So I have no issues with approaching folks and starting up conversations.  \n\nI believe that with me, the issue lies within empathetically listening to the other person.  For some reason whenever I am conversing with someone my mind switches into problem solving mode or I start telling a story that will somehow make it seem like I relate to them.  Whatever they are talking about my mind starts clunking away at it and then I spurt out a logical solution.  This works great if they are seeking my advice (so I'm awesome at the workplace) but it's absolutely terrible when say a pretty lady or a friend is sharing some intimate details with me and I can't keep my trap shut long enough to let them adequately tell the story so we can make a connection of some sort.\n\nRight now I'm slowly (very slowly) getting better at biting my tongue when talking to the opposite sex and also realizing that most people don't want their problems solved, they just want to talk and for you to understand.\n\nSo my question to you ladies and gentlemen is, what tips can you give me on becoming a better listener?  And how can I continue to improve and learn how to have deep bonding conversations with other people?\n\nI'm really looking forward to reading your responses!", "summary": "I keep yapping away and trying to solve peoples problems when they chat with me.  Any tips on how I can stop this and become a better empathetic listener?"}
{"id": "t3_1ui8wv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [F/24] caught me [M/24] doing drugs on new years at my house party. She is livid. What do I do?", "post": "Been dating for 4 years. I was doing cocaine with some friends in my bedroom on NYE and hid it from my girlfriend by locking my room door and telling her that my friends were just rolling joints in the bedroom. I did it a couple times but basically stayed out of the room all night. The issue really comes down to me lying to her about what was going on that night - the coke isn't as big of an issue. She hates the idea of me doing it, and I have probably only done it 3 times in my life. It's really about the lying.\n\nHer reasons for being upset are as follows (PS I think she's totally right and I'm a complete asshole for doing this).\n\n1. I lied to her\n2. I lied to her in front of people who knew I was lying to her\n3. She wasn't able to even access my bedroom and didn't feel at home in my house (which she should because she is here all the time. I get it)\n4. Because I did coke\n\nThe worst part is she caught me in another lie when we were talking about what happened, which obviously made things way worse.  Now I am a liar and she says she needs a break. I have literally never lied to her before in my life. This is the first time we've gotten into a fight over a lie. I don't care about the drugs (I don't have to ever do it again), I just want to patch things up. It obviously wasn't worth it. She is more upset with me than I have ever seen her be. I'm terrified.\nI've already apologized (the night of, and several times in person after) and I've admitted I was wrong about everything. But I don't think it's enough. I understand she is upset, I realize the magnitude of the situation but I don't think it's worth breaking up over this.", "summary": "My girlfriend of 4 years caught me doing coke and wants to breakup because of the lying.  I don't want to break up. "}
{"id": "t3_mdve4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Should r/shitredditsays be trying to influence mods in other subreddits to ban users?", "post": "While I understand the concept of the *circlejerk* and having your own subreddit to ridicule and rant and troll as you please, I've seen a trend in r/srs that gives a string indication of trying to influence other subreddits mods.  [Example]  I personally have no problem with the concept and normal practices of r/srs.  Everyone should be able to have a subreddit where they can discuss important or even extremely unimportant issues as far as those people are concerned.  It's what makes Reddit great.  However, when a subreddit goes from being an idea of satire and humor to an agenda of censorship and objectification, this could be a line that should not be crossed.  So Reddit, I ask you.  \n\n*Should a subreddit's users and mods engage in agendas to influence other subreddit's mods in order to get someone banned solely because they disagree with their point of view, especially when that subreddits sole purpose is to find objectionable comments/links for the purpose of ridicule?", "summary": "Should a subreddit's users and mods engage in agendas to influence other subreddit's mods in order to get someone banned solely because they disagree with their point of view?*"}
{"id": "t3_2fx9t6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The girl [21 F] I [30 M] am going out with keeps receiving crazy text messages from someone she does not know", "post": "[Update](\n\nI started hanging out with this girl for a while (about 2 months) and I really like her and hope to have a committed relationship with her soon. She seems to like me a lot as well. \n\nThere is a problem. She has received strange texts/calls from a stranger for a while. Those communications are really weird and sometimes scary to her too. She tries to avoid the number but after a while, the stranger changes the number and uses a new one to harass her again. She's really confused and does not know that person. Sometimes, she gives me the phone to answer the call from that stranger but when I do, there is no talk from the other side. \n\nI am a little bit worried for her and afraid that something bad might happen to her. What should I do to get her out of this situation?", "summary": "The girl I am going out with keeps receiving unwanted texts/calls from a stranger that she does not know. How to get her out of this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_cgn0b", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "\"straight\" woman dating a lesbian for a year and a half. Not sure if we should stay together or break up.", "post": "I say \"straight\" because after a year and a half with a woman I don't know if that classifies me as being such. \n\nA while back I met and became good friends with a lesbian. She had the hots for me, made a move, it felt great, and we've been seeing each other since. Today we had an emotional day and were very close to breaking up, all due to the fact that I'm scared and hesitant to be with a woman long term. For the record, she is everything I have ever looked for in a SO. \n\nSo here we are at the crossroads and I don't know where to go. On one hand she is all I could ask for and I'd be a fool to let her go. On the other hand, I have uncertainties about being with a woman for the long haul. It's not what I envisioned as my life, not to mention my parents are not ok with it. As in you end this or end your relationship with us.  \n\nDo I wait it out and see what happens? Or do I end it and call it a day? She's in this for the long term and tells me quite often that I'm the one. \nFYI - she's 31 and I'm 28. And the sex is amazing.", "summary": "straight woman dating a lesbian for a year and a half. Feeling nervous about a long term future with a woman, even though she has everything I've wanted in a partner. Do I stick it out or call it quits?"}
{"id": "t3_rwgn7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Are there hot female scientists? (x-post scientific analysis of sexy)", "post": "Many of my fellow scientists, including myself, have come up with a postulate. This theory states that the hotness of a girl is inversely proportional to her major. We are a varied group of chemistry, physics, and math majors and have not been impressed by the quality of our fellow female classmates. There seems to be a lack luster performance when it comes to looking good in class. The ones that do tend to be a part of the upper echelon are found in our lower level classes, and are not majoring in a true science, i.e. math, physics, chemistry, and biology.", "summary": "We hope our theory of no attractive female scientists can be disproven. They only way to disprove is to show a picture of you in front of a board explaining a scientific fact/theory."}
{"id": "t3_vcmxr", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/f] Boyfriend (25/m) loves to travel but can't support me going with him ever. What CAN be done, if anything?", "post": "Been with him for a year now, we broke up for other reasons around 5/14, however decided a week or so ago to try and work things out. Prior to breaking up, I had a lot going on so I never got to tell him how much his traveling got to me. Upon figuring out details for a 4th of July trip, his ability to travel came up again. His parents work for airline companies so, as a son, he gets to fly anywhere for free, and has since he was very small. He works at a construction company and does really well there, and has worked to be able to take time off almost whenever he wishes and get proper vacation time. I work part time and am actively looking for full time employment. In the mean time, I cannot take off work without typical office etiquette (putting it in at least 3 weeks prior, giving notice, etc), and to be honest, I can't afford to take time off as a part-timer as I get no benefits. So I lose almost half my paychecks if I did that. This is on top of just not having a job, because whats the point of hiring someone for them to never be around? I can put in for some money to go on trips but I just don't have the cash to pay for my whole ticket. Upon explaining my difficulty dealing with this, he said that this was something that he would not compromise on, stating that he will take any and all opportunities to go places, even if it means I do not join him. He goes places at least 4 or 5 times a year. \n\nOverall, I'm not sure what I can do. I'm not even sure if I'm the person that is in the \"right\" in this situation. I really wanted to work things out with him and he with me, but being unable to share important moments like this with him hurts me, and I feel like its unfair of him to assume that I'll just be okay with being left behind while he's in another place having fun.", "summary": "Boyfriend travels all the time and cannot support me enough to go with him all the time. Expects me to be okay with him leaving me by myself when I cannot afford a full ticket. What can be done, if anything?"}
{"id": "t3_46pg0q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [28F] finally ended my near 5 year relationship with my ex [29 M] who was a great guy. How did you cope?", "post": "It was so hard. He is such a great guy. Great boyfriend material, would make a wonderful father - patient, caring, loving, and loyal. And I had to give that all up because it simply wasn't working. I haven't felt a pain like this. It's a huge loss that I don't know how I can get myself back up. All these fears in me - Will I ever find someone as good and love me as much as he did? What if he's the best I could do? \n\nI've been hanging on to this failing relationship for so long simply because I couldn't let go of someone so good even though I knew that we weren't compatible and was inevitably growing apart. I've invested so much of my emotions and time with him that I don't know how I will go on. I feel like dating is going to be hellish as I will be using my ex as a yardstick and just nitpick at everyone who doesn't match up. \n\nFor now I've gone no contact as most have advised. Any tips or story that is similar to mine? You letting go of a great person? How are you doing now? Have you met someone?", "summary": "Just broke up with a great guy after a near 5 year relationship and finding it hard to cope. Any tips/stories is appreciated!"}
{"id": "t3_3207gf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] am begging my ex boyfriend [17M] to take me back, regardless of the fact he has a boyfriend[18M].", "post": "I can't believe I did it. I m crawling back on my belly to a guy i know i dont need and who was toxic as fuck to me. We had started dating when we were 13, the initial breakup was a year later, he gave me a panic attack in the middle of a mall.  we're now at the point where we've dated 5 times, i ended it twice and he 3 others. \n\nThe most recent time it ended, he ended it, because I got sick of him always offering me pot even though I told him I wanted nothing to do with it. In the end he told me he'd rather smoke pot than date me.  \n\nHe presently has a boyfriend he's been dating for maybe 6 months now. I know this relationship is very happy. I feel like an ass for wanting to rip this apart.\n\nDon't get me wrong, it's not like i havent tried to get over him, I've dated 4 girls and a guy in the time that we haven't been together. Nothing jives. I know im young and things will look up soon but I feel terrible. I need him. No one in the world has ever made me quite so happy, i feel like he's the end of a metaphorical red string. \n\nI texted him telling him what an asshole i am for doing this and how i felt about him at roughly 3 am. Great time, I know. Since then i've had anxiety so bad its causing me major chest pain, im pretty sure im under cardiac arrest. \n\nI don't know what to do. I want him back in the worst way but then again it could just be a major need to be loved and cared for? No, I know its a disgusting, major need to be loved and cared for and I just keep crawling back because he's the only guy who ever has. send help.", "summary": "Im a moody teenager with an emotional problem who keeps crawling back to the same ex because he's the only person who's ever really cared about me. I want to stop."}
{"id": "t3_2wn9kh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] girlfriend is leaving me [20M] because she is unhappy", "post": "Hello ! I'm trying really hard to not text her right now, so here I am. \n\nShe's leaving me because she says she is unhappy. In her defense, I had become a shitty boyfriend the last few months. It wasn't always like that I know we're young, but that's not what I want to hear. We lived with each other, and we loved each other. However, she feels as if maybe she didn't love me, and that she doesn't know what love is. We've been together three years, we almost got married. \n\nShe says maybe in the future we can try again. I know everyone says no contact, but is it a good thing to try again? I still love her. She also feels as if she needs to work on herself a bit. I want to work it out. Why couldn't she stay and work it out? Am I wrong for having some feels of hate for her not working it out? She wants to put herself first more instead of others.", "summary": "girlfriend leaving because she's unhappy. Doesn't want to stay to work it out, wants to work on herself. Maybe try again down the road."}
{"id": "t3_1ti42d", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "How to teach my 3 year old shih tzu not to bite", "post": "My shih tzu has always been difficult to train, but I acknowledge in the beginning it was human error. Mia was our second dog (our first dog practically trained himself) and neither or my parents had previously had dogs. We tried to do what we did with out first dog, but she didn't learn. It has taken her 2 years to be house trained (and even now she only does it 90% of the time, and if she is left alone with out our other dog she will have an accident because seperation anxiety). There is a lot we have to work on with her (she is very stubborn and not always the brightest). **Right now my biggest problem is biting.** She was always a nippy puppy but so was our other dog. She started by nipping as a puppy during play time, well it's not really nipping, she would just put her teeth on us. Eventually she started doing this harder and once I would end up with small scratches after play time, I realized we had to change what we were doing. I started the no bite rule (which my sister has a hard time abiding by but she finally is listening). Mia is not allowed to bite, when she is excited she puts her teeth on you, she does this every time I come home, I started ignoring her unless she brought a toy (this started to become less of a problem now). I thought all was going well until my brother came home to visit (after a few days in) he went to give her a kiss she bit his lip breaking the skin. I am really worried because if she does this to some random stranger on the street it can be grounds to put her down (I realize this doesn't happen often with a small dog but its always a possibility). Also she doesn't show warning signs of when she's upset or doesn't want us to do something. She doesn't growl as a warning and there are no body signs (my brother worked in an animal shelter and learned all about body signs and he didn't see anything). When she bites I will yelp and say no sternly, sometimes I bop her nose. What else can I do?", "summary": "my dog bit my brothers lip and broke the skin. Her biting diminished recently and she was doing very well before this in terms of biting. What can I do to get her to stop?"}
{"id": "t3_wfwdz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Pop culture savvy, current music listening, slang using, Urban Dictionary writing people of Reddit: What are the most current terms slang terms for different sex acts that teens would have heard?", "post": "There's a summer camp for teens I am a counselor for every year and one of the workshops we do is for teens to be able to ask the opposite sex questions they've always had but have never been comfortable asking. They write down their questions on index cards and then through mediation of adult counselors, they get their questions answered by the opposite sex of teenagers. A lot of the questions are normal, boys want to know if girls really think size matters, girls want to know if boys really get morning wood, etc. Not all the questions are of a sexual nature either, sometimes girls want to know if boys are intimidated by girls who are better at sports than they are and boys want to know if girls watch as much porn as they do. Well...most of the questions are related to sex.\n\nThat's where I need your help, sometimes the questions are just slang questions, one year it was a big discussion topic of what an \"Eiffel Tower\" was and would you ever be part of one? And what does it mean to \"super man that ho\"? I'm a 24 year old female and I don't watch a lot of MTV or necessarily know that most current terms being thrown around for sex acts. I know what sexting is, but what beyond that are terms I should be prepared to know what they are in case a camper asks?", "summary": "My teen campers might ask me about sex slang and I want to gain as much knowledge of current slang right now as possible."}
{"id": "t3_1orl9g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] am secretly dating a [49 F] got caught by her son.", "post": "So here's the deal...\n\nI met this woman in a family reunion as she's kind of a best friend to my mother. We actually got to know each other for almost two years without really hinting on any desire of one another. We just connected and felt good around each other. Then, one night we were just drinking wine while talking about mindless stuff when she suddenly confessed her feelings for me which prompted me to confess mine. We started flirting and I ended up kissing her leading to our now relationship.\n\nHowever, she asked for our relationship to be kept a secret since she has a 10 year old son and is friend to some of my relatives. She's scared of getting judged and/or criticized by people because she's \"officialy\" ina relationship with her father's son although he has never been there for her, as I'm told. They never married and, although he has denied it, she thinks he has another family because he only visits his son a couple hours on saturday. \n\nEven though, she has kept the fact that they're not a couple to her son. He used to think his parents are married and his father is just off to work and only has free time on saturdays but has recently begun to ask a lot about his father and the reason why he's almost absent.\n\nI get along with her son quite well and he seems to look at me as some kind of old bro. But just yesterday he caught us having sex, she was surprised and scared and asked me to immediately leave her place. She tells me he's acting kind of angry and/or disappointed at her, he doesn't speak to her or let her hold him. She asked me to stay away for some time since she thinks it's better if she talks to him alone. I respect her decision though I'm not really comfortable with it because I feel like running away from it. Although I don't really what to do about it or what to even expect. I guess I always kind of knew this would happen some time or another and in some way I wished for it to happen because I felt he deserved to know the truth about her mother and I but now I don't feel quite right about it.\n\nAny thoughts or similar experiences?", "summary": "I keep a secret relationship with an older woman, her son caught us having sex, don't know what to do or expect"}
{"id": "t3_2p6cpp", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "A little something I've noticed within this sub.", "post": "One thing I've noticed is that there are quite a few people here that follow certain percentage rules for buying cars, house, renting, etc.(name it and the rule is there). I think that's good, your better off being on top of your finances. Some rules are good to follow too, but it doesn't mean everyone has to follow them. But when these people see other people people breaking those rules (the rules they set in place for THEMSELVES) they freak out. \"You're paying too much for your car\" \"you can't afford that house\" \"you gotta sell it\". \n\nIdeally if they have it and are able to pay for it, they can 'afford' it. These items can also be considered investments once they are paid off, you might lose some money when you sell it -- but in the end it might have been worth it.\n\nIm usually a reader and this might be the first time I actually posted something, I do like the information I find in here and it will help me in the long run, but one of the most annoying things to read is when someone displays their numbers and everyone hops on the \"you can't afford that\" train. Let them be. Suggestions are nice, nagging sends people away.", "summary": "stop telling people they can't afford what they have based on your personal finance rules. You do you, everyone else does everyone else. It's annoying even when I'm not the person it's being directed at."}
{"id": "t3_1u31mw", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Do you have any thoughts/advice for a soon to be father (Who happens to be transgender)? Details inside!", "post": "Hello! \nHopefully this is the appropriate subreddit for this matter (and if it isn't just tell me where to go!)\n\nToday, I found out that I am going to be a father! I'm so looking forward to the new year :)\nThis post is more \"me centered\", just to let you know.\n\nMy situation is a little unusual because I am a transgender man (meaning I was born a girl).\n...So with that, I have no ability to impregnate my wife (or anyone for that matter). My brother was willing to be a donor for when we felt the time was right. \nAfter going through legal details and lots of medical testing, My wife is now 5 weeks pregnant!\n\nWe are ages 27 & 28, 4 years married (So close to 5!), financially stable, recently moved from our apartment into a house. \n\nWe are so thrilled to start a family. Late nights and long talks about parenting have brought out lots of details and plans. Of course we talked about my gender identity and what aspects of it could effect our child, Positive and Negative. We feel a bit stuck.\n(We both agree that being honest to our child is important)\n\nI'm just worried about their future. What if I don't explain things right. \nThe facts are that:\ndad is transgender, doesn't have boy parts (even though he is hairy, sounds like a boy and doesn't have a chest), dad can't have babies... so .... obviously.\n\nAlong with trying not to confuse my child, I'm concerned for our safety. \nI am legally male and apart from my close friends, doctors and family, Nobody knows about my transition. \nSo many bad things happen to transgender people, simply because they are trans. I've lived through a hate based attack, and since then I've been terrified of having people finding out. I now live in more accepting city, but I can never be to sure. \n\nAny input or advice you might have on the situation is greatly appreciated.\nThanks!", "summary": "Guy can't have babies due to having been being born a girl, Guy's brother donates sperm, Wife is now 5 weeks pregnant, guy is worried about how being transgender might effect the child (Explaining it, safety), "}
{"id": "t3_13cdkb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is there really a \"Button\" area on a humans body that will, upon impact, cause unconsciousness?", "post": "My Father, a few UFC/Boxing announcers and myself call the area on the face under the eye \"The Button\", because in most fights when that area is struck really hard, it's immediate jelly-legs as they hit the canvas unconscious...\n..now is that actually, as we call it, a \"Button\" area that causes them to lose consciousness? Or is it just because the guy got punched in the face?\n\nAlso, we've all seen it in the movies where the Martial Arts Master sneaks up from behind and gives the enemy a chop to the side of the neck *(\"JUDO CHOP!\")*, causing their enemy to black-out. I've seen and been in enough fights to know that simply taking a hit to the side of the neck isn't going to do anything but hurt and maybe activate a pressure-point and just hurt more...but is there a certain area there on the neck *(or anywhere, for that matter)* that can be hit or pinched that will cause instant unconsciousness *(without the unconsciousness coming from the force of the hit, but rather the placement)*?\n\nJust curious.", "summary": "Is there an area in the body that can be struck or manipulated that will cause instant unconsciousness *(again, not from the force of the hit but from the area)*??"}
{"id": "t3_1xo03n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] was broken up with by boyfriend of 4 years [23M], i just want to be happy again :(", "post": "We broke up a few days before christmas and I have been very upset and sad since then. Basically immediately after the breakup he started seeing someone new which really hurt me of course cause I had hope we would get back together. Since then I have tried seeing other people. Things always seem to be going well at first but then I feel like the other person doesn't really care that much or want to date me. \n\nI feel extremely lonely and miss being in a relationship. I really miss the companionship, and I know I should become comfortable with being on my own but it really sucks and I feel miserable. Especially when I think about my ex and how he is doing everything we used to do together with someone else. Then this just makes me feel worse cause no one seems to want to do anything with me. I feel like people and especially my ex are almost laughing at me that I haven't found anyone new. And it seriously seems like everyone else is in a happy relationship while I am sitting here preparing to be alone forever.  \n\nI know I shouldn't be trying to find happiness in a relationship, I just don't want to end up alone forever.", "summary": "Feel like I will be alone forever and that no one wants to be with me. Poor me my life sucks i know, alert the media."}
{"id": "t3_4lm1ra", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (34m) parents never disciplined my (31m) brother and now he's a psychopath", "post": "I'm kind of at my wits end here. \n\nMy parents never disciplined my brother growing up. My father always thought it was \"adorable\" how he always tried to control everyone and my Mother never intervened\n\nNow my brother is a 31 year old man and is a complete psychopath. He tries to control everyone by doing shit like moving things around the house to \"force (usually me) to get exercise\" or to \"take responsibility\" for shit, when there's nothing to have responsibility for. \n\nBoth him and I are disabled and I have literally no place else to go. I'm physically disabled and my parents are my IHSS workers, but they let my brother who is I guess you can say \"more normal\" that me, run rampart and do whatever he wants. \n\nA few years ago my brother started popping pills and has become worse with anger; acting more crazy than he already was, but now he has this notion that he's gonna be president next year (I've posted about this before) and thinks people are constantly after him wanting him dead\n\nPretty much I don't feel safe in my house anymore and my parents refuse to do anything about it or do anything about him. I've asked them and told them it's not Fair to me because I have no where else to go, and as my IHSS workers and Parents, they should make my place of living as safe as possible. \n\nI don't know what else to do. I don't want to contact IHSS and tell them my parents aren't making my living situation a safe environment but at the same time, I can't live like this much longer from someone who thinks I need to learn life lessons on a daily basis", "summary": "my brother is a controlling psychopath after no discipline as a child. Parents refuse to make my home where I'm physically disabled a better place and do something about him"}
{"id": "t3_1j9bby", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/f] Boyfriend [21/m] is going through Ramadan again and his dad is going nuts.", "post": "So since mid-July my boyfriend and his dad have been doing the annual Ramadan, as my SO is half Muslim. He does it out of practice since his dad has made him do it since he hit puberty, and naturally it progressed into just being a thing he does every summer. Anyways, if you don't know what Ramadan is, look up some specifics on it but a brief description is that Muslims cannot eat from dawn to dusk for a month long period, as well as other rules such as no touching/intimacy with loved ones, ingesting water, taking medications, etc. \n\nWithout food or drink, during the blazing hot summer, you'd think someone would get a little moody. Truth. My boyfriend's dad is going nuts. He normally is every other 11 months of the year, but currently, it's some sort of ongoing insecurities with my boyfriend also stepping up in his adulthood by getting his licence, a career and paying bills, all in sequence. I don't know if that has something to do with it but I believe it does, as he is the eldest (by over 10 years) and his dad has some cultural expectations for him, as well as threats of throwing him out of the house, not doing enough for his mom, and so forth. To say in the least, it's very hard to witness and hear about. \n\nSo I'm writing this asking any other Redditors if you have every had a SO with a personal choice or a parents' influence to do Ramadan, and how you (as a non-participator) felt/dealt with it? \n\nAlso, how can I stop feeling distaste towards his dad, as I see this  packing on more and more emotional weight on my SO?", "summary": "Boyfriend and his dad are Muslim and are currently in Ramadan, which inhibits a lot, and seems to be making his dad go bonkers on my boyfriend. How can I cope with seeing him suffer."}
{"id": "t3_26cshi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "It's been 2 years and I'm still grieving the loss of my (20F+20M) 3 year relationship", "post": "So in about an hour will be the day that would have marked my (20F) would be 5 year anniversary with a guy (20M) I've basically loved since 7th grade...We're not currently together because I was his first...everything (relationship, first kiss, etc.) and we're both at different universities so he wants to see what else is out there. We still talk (message) occasionally, and he will tell me about his bad experiences with women and how he \"spent an hour on the roof appreciating [me] last night\", and other such things. I have faith that we will find our way to each other again, it just sucks that I have to deal with the uncertainty, the pain, the heartbreak, while it's so much easier for him because he was the one who wanted to call it quits. \n\n2 years later, I'm **STILL** grieving the loss of my relationship. Am I crazy for doing so? No other romantic experience has even come close to what I had with him, but he thinks it's too soon to get back together. Logically I agree, logistics aren't exactly favorable right now (different universities, don't know where we will be working after finishing up school, etc.). Emotionally, my heart just hurts.", "summary": "Still grieving the loss of my 3 year relationship which ended ~2 years ago. Not sure if I need comfort/advice/support/to vent."}
{"id": "t3_3iy8of", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "How do I prevent frustration/overreacting to failure and mistakes?", "post": "The way I learn tends to follow a particular pattern. I try, I make a mistake, I shut down and become intensely frustrated. This will cause me to make more mistakes, to be too angry to focus on the task at hand.\n\nThis has become an issue learning to drive. I was doing a practice test, everything was going fine. I was about to enter a road and failed to give way to a car on my left that was entering the area I wanted to enter. My supervisor had to brake and point it out to me. I was to focused on the cars to my right, I didn't even see the car on the left, and part of me didn't even realise cars would ever be coming from that direction. \n\nI was stunned at my stupidity, so much so I was angry. Ranting, raving, to the point I was asked to calm down. I couldn't control the frustration, it was just this compulsion to tear myself apart. I can look back and only feel ashamed and stupid. Stupid for making the mistake and ashamed at my behaviour, but it doesn't stop me from making a new mistake and doing the same thing. \n\nI am part terrified I am not ready for the test if I don't know such obvious things, and part angry at my behavior, ashamed, everything. \n\nI have no idea why I behave this way, does anyone else? How can I overcome this?", "summary": "I become overwhelmed by anger and anxiety when I make errors. I don't know how to stop and realise instantly that it's going to happen and I just need to learn from the error and move on."}
{"id": "t3_v63lz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/m] Considering a break up with girlfriend [20/f] of 2 years. Need more input.", "post": "We've been together a little over 2 years now. We've been in a long distance relationship for the entirety of those 2 years, since our universities are rather far away. Monthly visits, summers together. Most communication is through text, and IM; we rarely skype.\n\nThe time we spend together is great, I have no problems with this, but this last semester has simply been a train wreck of issues, arguments and petty insults. I've tried to break up with her twice already and I couldn't go through with it. The break ups happened because she started acting really detached and rarely speaking to me, and she  wouldn't leave me alone about a girl I liked before I met her. At the time I hadn't spoken to the aforementioned girl for length of our relationship (we can refer to her as May). The crying and the promises she made made me hope for a better future, and it was good for a little while.\n\nShe has been insecure before, but I always reassured her at every move. Recently, I haven't been reassuring her and I don't want to. I've grown tired of having to help her through so many of her issues; I mean i've been reassuring her constantly for just under 2 years. \n\nIt shames me to say this  but, I have been looking at over women in her presence; she's caught me before. I've talked to May without telling my gf. Sparks have flown. \n\nI still have feelings for my gf, although they have severely diminished. I really don't like the idea of hurting her. She's a really sweet and sensitive girl.", "summary": "I've grown tired of being burdened by my gf's issues for over 2 years. Long distance. I want out. I'm her 1st bf, 1st kiss, 1st everything..."}
{"id": "t3_zh6h2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Guys, my friend's dad just got a divorce with my friend's mom and has told my friend he is going to kill himself. He is 15, we have NO IDEA what to do.", "post": "To sum everything up, I've never met my friends parents. They are always busy and because of that my friend is extremely independent. He does sports that don't rely on a team like power lifting, track... and because of this he doesn't really rely on anyone except me. His dad would always be working and his mom is always on the phone. Recently, they got into a huge fight and his dad decided he was going to leave that night, out of nowhere. My friend was extremely devastated, and he called his girlfriend that night and cried to her but she didn't give him any attention really. But he was very strong and seemed like he was in a good mood for the next few weeks.\n\nToday he drove me home from school with him. After he dropped his girlfriend off at driver's ed we got to my house and his mom called him. I don't know what they talked about but I could hear her voice and it sounded very grim. After that call, within like 5 minutes, his dad called. My friend said that his dad told him that he loved him with all his being and that he wants his son to make him proud. He said that he has never spoke any 'bullshit' to anyone and all things of that effect. After this he told my friend that after he gets off his shift, he's gonna go somewhere, tell my friend where he is, and kill himself, and for my friend to call the police. We called his mom and his mom said he was just trying to guilt trip her. My friend then told me his mom gave his dad a pistol and a full clip earlier in the week because he said he was going to kill himself. What the actual fuck\n\nWe have no idea what to do please help.", "summary": "Friends dad says he's gonna kill himself after a divorce. Friend's mom doesn't care, we have no idea what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4tbjdn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28f] broke up with my bf [34m] and he cant let go.", "post": "I made all of the mistakes you possibly could with a relationship:\n1. Dated my best male friend for 10 months.\n2. Dating my best male friend who is also a co-worker and part of my social circle.\n\nI broke up with him for a very selfish reason. His ex wife and mother of his kids is trying to make me miserable, keeps meddling in our relationship and is constantly verbally attacking me. \n\nAfter multiple blowouts with her, and him doing everything he could to stop her, I realized she won't change and I need to move on. \n\nProblem is he is so madly in love with me, and I with him that we can't let go of each other. We spend days on end talking in the phone, him trying to find a solution and me telling him I don't think it'll work. He constantly begs me to stay. I don't wanna cut contact because i have to see him at work, I want to be his friend again but the feelings keep getting in the way. He's so depressed now, and I feel so awful. He's a mess and I want to help him. \n\nIf the circumstances were different we would be together for sure, but I don't wanna get into a life with someone who is being controlled and harassed by their ex.\n\nI'm coming to Reddit to talk some sense into me. Normally I can walk away from a doomed relationship but he's like my best friend and I want to help him cope and deal with this. \n\nNeed some advice.", "summary": "I broke up with my best friend co-worker boyfriend over his crazy ex wife and I can't let go and watch him hurt."}
{"id": "t3_1tfmat", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My single friend [19 F] has been chatting with a married [~30 M], can I tell her to stop?", "post": "I found out my friend has been talking to an older married guy online for at least month.  Apparently they talk alot about sex and he has been giving her advice on how to handle fuck-buddy relationships.  In return, she has been sharing the details of her encounters.\n\nI am happy my friend is enjoying herself, but this guys seems like a serious creeper to me.  At least he is on the other side of the country.  I casually mentioned that I did not think this was a good idea, but haven't pushed too hard on the topic.  Am I being too judgemental, or do I need to step up and tell her this guys seems like the kind of wierdo one should avoid?", "summary": "Can I tell my friend that it is not appropriate to chat with an older married guy about sex, even if he is \"just being friendly\"?"}
{"id": "t3_2lfvtq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by underestimating the power of the jalapeno", "post": "Being a broke ass high school graduate waiting tables, I'm always down for some extra cash. My friends bet me $20 that I wouldn't eat a jalapeno, which I'd never done. I'd only had the weak-ass canned ones that didn't do shit.\n\nAnyway, I went for it. I learned two horrible, horrible lessons.\n\n1) I am allergic to fresh jalapenos.\n\n2) Sneezing a whole sneeze-ful of jalapeno-infused fluid sucks. Especially when you have a brand new, still healing septum piercing and a recently fucked up nostril [for those who haven't seen my first post, i tried to pierce my own nose and tore my nose open]\n\nAnyway, my entire nose is on fire and I'm itchy all over.", "summary": "Jalapenos are a force not to be fucked with. And sneezing + nose piercings are not my thing."}
{"id": "t3_rtvio", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Quick Question about Online Dating", "post": "I'm a 19 year old guy who's had one really bad relationship in the past and I was wondering if maybe internet dating would be right for me. I've been asked out by women in the past, but was always scared they were playing around, dared to do it or taking pity on me and figured I needed to meet someone anonymous (and also interested in dating, hence trying one of these sites) to start to get over the stigma about relationships. Any opinion for online dating? does it work? Are there any other options for me? I've heard the stats, but I don't really believe them (too many statistical bias courses for me)\n\nWon't have access to a computer tonight but will read any responses or answer any questions in the morning.\nThank you to everyone and anyone that responds.", "summary": "Scared 19 year old needs advice on whether online dating works, or any other alternatives to getting over shyness and stigma about general relationships."}
{"id": "t3_46emnd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girl [16F] I [18M] have been meeting has seen a bad picture of me and won't speak any more", "post": "I have been meeting a girl for about just over a month. At the weekend, she kissed someone on a night I was going to meet her and told me a few days later\n\nI said it's okay because we haven't had any talks about being exclusive and she said yeah let's not go exclusive yet so I agreed.\n\nA few nights later I went to a club with friends and got way too drunk and kissed someone else, which I thought was fine since we just had a talk about not being exclusive yet.\n\nHowever, somebody put a snapchat story up of it and my hand is very high up the girls leg and the girl I'm seeing has seen it and has assumed that I did more than just kiss her, which I did not do but the picture is so bad.\n\nShe won't talk to me today or reply or open any messages but she's been online so I know she's ignoring me. \n\nI really like this girl and want to take I further but I feel like she won't get past this and I don't know what to do", "summary": "girl I have been meeting has seen a bad picture of me after is saying we're not exclusive and won't talk to me anymore"}
{"id": "t3_1dbqrg", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "How do I get my friend to stop being a bridezilla?", "post": "Here's the scenario:\n\nMy(M) friend(F) is getting married Sunday. It's gonna be super fun. However, she is being super crazy, and not having a Father/ Daughter or Mother/ Son dance at her wedding. Her reasoning is that's not how her family operates. \n\nThat would be cool and dandy, but I know the Grooms Mom is going to be completely devastated by this since they're more of a traditional family.\n\nSo Reddit, how can I change the Bride's mom into letting her fiance have a dance with his mom?\n\nAlso, they didn't do marriage counseling because according to her \"it would cause fights\". if that gives you anymore of an idea on how to fix this situation.", "summary": "Bride won't let Groom have a Mother/ Son dance. How can I change her mind before it causes some major bitterness down the line?"}
{"id": "t3_21u5cw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 M] cut off my dad [51 M], but my mother [48F] keeps insisting I speak to him again.", "post": "My parents divorced when I was very young, and growing up there was always tons of drama from my dad and mom always fighting. They both put me through a hell of a lot (he said she said shit), and last year my therapist even said, \"Your mother should have cut contact between you and him when you were ten, and left it at that.\"\n\nThis was after telling her that as a child he's made me pick up cigarette butts off of his yard \"as a game\", change my step-brother's diapers (I was a kid myself, maybe 8-9 or something?), and of course this huge dramatic event where he beat the shit out of me when I was 10 for not wanting to cut my hair. That event in particular led me to not speak to him for several years.\n\nMy therapist said it's up to me if i want to try to have a relationship with him (whom she agrees has huge issues), and I decided against it. He's religiously abusive, and can't seem to get past the fact that I'm atheist. He's got a big new family now, and I have lived with him a few times throughout the years (18-19, 21-23), but I just don't care to have a relationship with him. He's hurt me so bad in the past, and although he's more \"stable\" now, I honestly just don't care to invest in a relationship with him.\n\nBut my mother (who used to hate him, told me he raped her before, was verbally abusive towards her) still insists one day I should speak with him again. So this got me wondering, am I just trying to hurt my dad by not speaking with him, or do I have a legitimate excuse to cut him out of my life, for good, or both?", "summary": "Dad was a straight up asshole, is \"nice\" now though but still disrespectful due to his extreme religious practice, wondering if it's okay to not speak to him again."}
{"id": "t3_2579n5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 M] can't tell if my new Girlfriend [20 F] has a problem saying no?", "post": "So I have been seeing this girl for about a month and a half and I have noticed that when I am texting her and I ask her about hanging out she will either say yes or she will just not respond at all. Than she wont text me for a couple days. Another thing is that sometimes she will agree to hangout on a later date and than on the day we are supposed to hangout and I ask when she will be ready the same thing will happen. \n\nI can't tell if this is her not wanting to say no because she is afraid to possibly hurt my feeling and if so, should I talk to her about it next time we hang out and reassure her that she can say no to me and it wont hurt my feelings?", "summary": "When I text my new girlfriend about hanging out she will either say yes or just not respond, should I bring it up to her?"}
{"id": "t3_1771sa", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[36F dating 22M] Don't know when to fold 'em", "post": "I [36F] have been seeing this guy [22M] for about six months. Started as purely casual & sexual but somehow morphed into something that resembles a real relationship. \n\nProblem is, we aren't overwhelmingly compatible. It's not bad, just not very exciting. We're kind of like an old married couple. Cook dinner. Watch TV. Cuddle. We get on well enough. I enjoy spending time with him. There is attachment (he is more attached to me than I am to him), but I don't see much long-term potential. \n\nFor one, there is the big, flaming age gap. He is just starting out. I'm not. I am divorced with a five year old; he is about to finish college and go to grad school. Sex is pretty blah (I have HL, he has LL). He says he doesn't want kids, but he's too young to know for certain. If he changes his mind, by the time he's done with school, my eggs will be fried. God, when he's 30, I'll be 44. It seems like a bad idea.\n\nI don't know what the fuck we are doing with each other, honestly. I wasn't looking for anything serious, nor was he. Ultimately I feel like we must be killing time until something better comes around.\n\nWhen I came to that realization, I thought it would be better to cut things off. It was like, \"Eh, I'll wait till after his birthday,\" and then, \"Eh, who wants to ruin Christmas,\" and now it's like, \"Only two weeks until Valentine's Day.\" \n\nBut, maybe I am not too committed to breaking things off. I do like him. On one hand, since I'm not ready for anything serious, this is kind of perfect (except the sex could be much better). On the other hand, we are just going to get more and more attached, which will make it harder when everything implodes.", "summary": "Lukewarm pseudo-relationship with big, potentially fatal age gap. Should I cut it off before we get even more attached than we already are, or just let it keep going?"}
{"id": "t3_1qmj96", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help! I'm [21 M] insecure about my SO [22 F] going out to clubs & bars without me.", "post": "Some background: We have only been dating for about 2 months and we started dating in my hometowm, tho I go to school in a different city. But we're not exactly long distance. I live close enough to drive home any weekend I want (only about an hour and a half drive) so I've seen her every other weekend so far this quarter and she's actually coming up to visit this weekend.  We haven't put a label on our relationship but I know we're being exclusive with each other.\n\nThis is kind of hypocritical of me because I go out without her on the weekends when we're not in the same city, but I can't help but feel anxious when she goes out with her friends!  I feel weird about this because I know we're in a commited relationship and I trust her not to cheat on me. (last time she went out with her friends she complained that too many guys were trying to chat her up. And she told me she missed me. She was kinda drunk haha)  \n\nI feel even worse because I know she's not going out to look for guys ( She knows plenty of guys and has been in more relationships than I have and I am OK with that)  She's just trying to have a good time with her friends! I definitely dont want to stop her from having fun. I actually like that she has friends to go out with while I'm away at school.  \n\nWhenever I think about this rationally I know deep down she really likes me and that I have nothing to worry about. I'm just stressed and feel like there is something wrong with me.\n\nSo how can I bring this up to her without upsetting her or making it seem like I want to control what she does?\n\nThanks for any advice in advance.", "summary": "I get anxious when my girlfriend goes out to clubs and bars with her friends without me.  How can I bring this up to her without coming off as upset?"}
{"id": "t3_1zva9s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M 21] just spoke with my crush/rejector [F 19] for the first time in over a month. She finally explained her side, but I'm still confused and somehow more hurt. Need help understanding and how to move from here.", "post": "We had been known each other for a about a year, flirting and hanging out consistently for about 4 months. We went on a number of dates, and the morning after the last one, I received the dreaded \"friend-zone\" text, saying that she thought of me as more of a brother than a romantic interest. She dodged a few questions, and without much fanfare blocked me on facebook/shut me out of her life. I was devastated, with no answers and closure, I spent the next month in a bad spot. \n\nI heard on Tuesday through a mutual friend that she'd be willing to talk about things. I contacted her today, and we met and she finally answered my questions. \n\nShe did like me. She did have feelings for me, and she was excited to explore these feelings and go on dates with me. She had an excellent time on the last date we went on, until she got home and her roommates told her that it was obvious that I was crushing on her. Apparently the favors I would do for her, that she didn't realize until her friends pointed them out, somehow changed her mind about her feelings for me. I am incredibly confused about what this means. I don't understand how realizing that someone you are interested reciprocates is a turn off. If someone can explain this to me, I'll be in a much better place, because right now, I'm confused and hurt.\n\nI already have all of the \"she's playing you man, just move on\" confirmation bias I could ever need with the other people in my life, so I don't want to see that here. I'm looking for answers from people who have insight into the change of heart that happened, and explain how it makes sense.", "summary": "was told she lost interest in me because her friends thought it was obvious I was crushing on her. Confused and need help understanding."}
{"id": "t3_1ymrnf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my friend [22 F], that i have feelings for a long time, feels like i've been used.", "post": "I've had feelings for this girl for quite some time, she knows that he hang out almost daily. She doesn't have a lot of friends and she is having some hard time both financially and medically speaking. We had on an off friendship until i decided to break it up completely ~ 2 years ago (after she said she had no romantic feelings for me whatsoever), an had a relationship with a girl for 9 months, and after breaking it up she appeared in my life out of nowhere again, wanting to hang out and feel leaden on. About a month ago i asked if wants to be more than friends and her reply was \" i don't want to lose you as a friend if we dated and something went wrong\". I'll have helped her and still have both financially and emotionally with almost every breakdown she has had, been there for her supporting her loaned or given her money, payed for food or whatsoever. But every time i feel like things may get serious between us he kind backs-off, Friends and people that know her dont have such a positive thoughts about her, she can be a real bitch. People have said that she is using me and i kinda get that feeling, i know that, but the feeling that i have for her overcome that. I know it sounds stupid but that is the way things are, we chat see and hear each other on daily basis, and i have a dull feeling about it. The reason i post here is your opinions, she knew/knows i have always had feelings for her, and if she doing that solely to use me is she being a \" Giant Cunt\" like everyone else is telling me, how to proceed?", "summary": "I have feelings for a close friends for years, she is now back im my life and i feel like Im being used. how should i proceed ?"}
{"id": "t3_2oe5hb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [20M] unable to have fun?", "post": "There is an issue that keeps cropping up and is making me worried that I may not be as fun as people may think I am. For starters, I'm not exactly a socialite. I only really talk with my close friends, and it takes a long time for me to warm up to people and become friends with them in the first place. However, I am pretty goofy and have a good sense of humor (or so I'm told). This makes people think I'm really outgoing, when really I'm extremely shy.\n\nI wouldn't say I have social anxiety, but I find myself becoming nervous in social situations. This issue has given me a wake up call recently when I froze up on a date with a long time crush and ultimately lost my chance with her. I planned the whole night out: going to a concert, walking around downtown, blah blah blah. However, the situation changed and things weren't going according to my plan. I felt like I lost control, got really nervous, and froze. It stopped me from having fun with my crush, stopped me from having fun at the concert. I find it to be quite the problem, now that I'm at a stage where I'm actively seeking a relationship.\n\nIt doesn't just happen with people I am trying to impress, too. When I'm just with friends, say, planning a day out or so, I start to get nervous because I want things to go according to plan. Maybe we are taking the bus to a park. The whole time I will be checking my phone to make sure I'm going in the right direction, distracted from interacting with my friends and having fun.\n\nTo me, I think I just have a problem with \"going with the flow.\" Does this sound about right? I want to be able to go out with friends and let go and have fun. I want to be able to go out with girls and act casual and be myself. I feel like this need to plan everything out is a barrier that is keeping me from meeting people because I'm afraid of the unexpected, even though I know I can't predict the future.\n\nAny tips on how I can be more social, more outgoing, and more capable of going with the flow? Thanks!", "summary": "I get nervous in social situations, and I feel like this is keeping me from having fun and interacting with people I want to be closer to."}
{"id": "t3_28qfdi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] with my ex from 7 years ago [24F] Is it too late to apologise?", "post": "Got involved with a girl at 18. She was a virgin, I was as well, but lied to her out of being ashamed to admit. I really wanted to lose my v card so I played the front.\n\nFinally lost it to her after we talked for a coupe months. Was good, but overall frustrating experience. She expected commitment of course after that. Me being the dumb 18 year old panicked and cut things off by not agreeing to go out on dates with her.\n\nShe realized I was just in it for sex so she texted me saying this wasnt gonna work out. I was relieved and sheepishly said that \"I agree\"\n\nHad a feeling she was testing my commitment with that text, she sort of expected me to fight back for her, and I didn't. Memory is fuzzy, but we didn't talk after that.\n\nOvertime I changed as a person, and realized what I did was an extremely shitty move on my behalf. I still can't forgive myself, I was a fucking ignorant douchebag. \n\nI found her face book froma friends account and really want to message an apology. I'd do it in person but she doesn't live in my town anymore unless she visits the odd summer. I don't have Facebook so I'd have to create one, no big deal. \n\nIf she saw me in person she'd probably spill a drink in my face or at the least wouldn't want to even talk.\n\n Is it too late? Would she be insulted that I just decided after 7 years to apologize? If I let it be I feel like if I ever saw her she wouldn't believe I was sorry, and just saying it.", "summary": "want to sincerely apologise for messing with girl from 7 years ago and a shitty break up. Can only do it online, can't see her physically, is it too late?"}
{"id": "t3_3te9pk", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by terrifying a freshie for weeks", "post": "So, this is about 4 years ago. I was a sophomore in highschool. \nIt was in the first week of school that me and my friend group heard the name of this freshman.. He had an awesome name. Idk how i can make something comparable.. We'll call him Barry Powers. It wad like that, a superhero type name. So anyway, we heard the name Barry Powers during freshman roll call and we were like \"damn! What a sick name!\" And made it our ultimate mission to find this guy.\nAnd so we searched.\nIt took weeks. \nWhenever we met other freshmen, we asked, \"do you know Barry Powers?\" And other questions like \"what does he look like?\", \"where did you last see him?\", and \"where can we find him?\".  We really wanted to find this kid and congratulate him on his name.\nSo, after two weeks of this walking around and searching and asking, we ask someone about Mr. Powers and their answer is \"oh, he's right there.\"  we get freakin hyped and beeline to the dude, who looks at us with fear in his eyes. Thinking back on it, we had the poor kid, who was eating lunch on his own, in a corner surround by 4 of us. I asked, \"hey man. You Barry Powers?\"\n\"y-yeah..\" He managed to respond. \n\"oh, well, you have a sweet name!\" I said.\n\"ok..\" Mumbled Powers. Now, the next moment was like the end of an always sunny episode; my friends and I looked around and each other and decided, \"oh cool we did it, moving on now.\"\nIt was only a little bit later that we heard that this poor guy thought this was some massive hazing ritual the whole time. And since we had asked so many people, most of the freshman class thought here was some crazy hazing where we chose one random dude, hunted him down, and did something to him. Oops!", "summary": "Inadvertently made a guy (and the rest of his class) think we were hunting him down to haze him, when we just wanted to compliment his rockin name."}
{"id": "t3_1cituw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Together [20M] [21F] for 5 years. Now she says she needs a break(more Info inside)", "post": "Hi\n\nI don't usually come to reddit for this kind of advice, but I currently have no other to talk to.\n\nI've been together with my girlfriend for 5 years now and everything was going really well. 2 Years ago I got a really unsatisfying job which made me depressed. I didn't want to realize it until it was too late. \n\nThis had an impact on our both lives as I would have no motivation to do anything. I didn't want to go clubbing anymore, travel somewhere etc. \n\n2 weeks ago she opened my eyes as she told me she needs a break. I finally got my shit together, quit my job and did other things which I should've done long time ago.\n\nNow I'm not sure how to approach it to not lose her. I wrote notes about ~80 very nice moments we've had with each other and read it with her. I told her what I think about our future and she said she had the same plans. I told her that I love her and she told me she loves me too.\n\nWhat should I do next? I don't want her to forget me but I also don't want to put too much pressure on her. I'm planning on reminding her about more good moments we've had and asking her out on a date in maybe 2-3 weeks. \n\nAny advice?", "summary": "together 5 years, I got depressed and was lazy in our relationship, she needs a break. I don't want to lose her, what do?"}
{"id": "t3_4ijxu7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Better the second time around? Me(M/22) with my ex(F/21)", "post": "It's been four months now since Jesse and I have broke up. We ended our relationship due to trust issues that we could not move past. We decided to be friends after (I know, you guys say never be friends with an ex) well anywho, we did and it actually is going well! At first we had a couple bad spurts trying to adjust while we were talking to other people(she with her ex, and me with people from school) but we still hang out a lot and continue doing the same hobbies we enjoyed. Honestly, it stills feel like we're dating but it's so much better than how it felt our entire relationship. We connect a lot better now and I feel closer to her than I ever have.\n\nLately, i've been feeling myself get more involved emotionally again so I don't know whether I should back off and slow down the friendship or should I propose the idea of dating to her again? I feel like we have a better shot this time but it might just blow up in my face.\n\nPeople who have gotten back together with their exes, how much time did you allow during the separation and how did it go for you?", "summary": "Don't know if I should quit while i'm ahead. Ex is still in my life but should she stay an ex?"}
{"id": "t3_4sk2d1", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Mental support for my brother (possibly schizophrenic)", "post": "Reddit. I'm in an emotional clussterfuck. Apologies for formatring, I'm on mobile. I need advice in helping save my brother from abandonment, and probably homelessness. A little background; \nHe's 30 years old, diagnosed schizophrenic by BHR, and they have changed his medications more times than I can remember. I'm almost a decade younger than he is, and have grown up seeing him hospitalized, do large amounts of drugs, be arrested, have multiple restraining orders, etc. Here's the thing, he gets paranoid, feels sick from his meducarion, and stops taking it. That's what causes episodes. My sister doesn't think it's schizophrenia, having been only a year apart from him. He lives with my parents, and I have personally been in a physical altercation with him. When I was, he pinned me down to beat my face in and stopped the moment I said \"(name), you don't want to hurt me\". I know, from growing up with him, that he is lonely and he suffers. His best friend shot himself when they were in high school and I know he hadn't been the same since. He was molested as a child and has been through a lot. Yesterday my mother called me to let me know that they have a restraining order on him because they do not feel safe with him there (He has probably not taken medication in a couple months and stole all of the knives, been weird, had fights). We don't know where he is, but court is on the 22nd and I don't know what will happen to him. BHR has been a nightmare and he's been on the waiting list with them to get an apartment for ages. He has been suffering a root canal for months and is also on a waiting list for removal. He started smoking to dull the pain. There's so much more to it, and my sister and I spent last night crying and drinking because we are entirely helpless. We don't want to see him on the street. Here's where I'm asking for advice. Are there any known programs or groups that can help us get him on his feet? We're almost certain he's homeless now and he doesn't have a cell phone with data or minutes.", "summary": "brother needs mental help and I am helpless. I need to find out if there is an organization other than BHR to help."}
{"id": "t3_3c3rd8", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not knowing what a dodecahedron is", "post": "I play a game with my six year old where I give her a topic to research on Google and she writes a basic report or draws it, depending on the subject. We were driving somewhere yesterday and talking about shapes, the difference between a pyramid and a cone, trapezoids, rhombus, pentagons, octagons. She knows all of those, no problem. So I try to make it harder and the only thing I can think of is a dodecahedron.\n\n\"Do you know what a dodecahedron is?\" I asked her. \n\"No. What's a dodeca... wait what did you say?\" she replied.\n\"Do-dec-a-he-dron.\" I repeated this a few times until she got it. \"When we get home I would like you to draw it for me.\" \n\nWe get home, I give her my iPad, write the word down on a piece of paper for her to type into Google, and go into my office to do some work. She gets out her crayons and paper. About 10 minutes later I hear her crying. I walk into her room, there's a couple of crumpled pieces of paper on the floor and she's bawling. \"IT'S THE HARDEST THING I'VE EVER DRAWN!!!!\"\n\nI thought it was a simple two-dimensional shape, like an octagon with more sides. I look on the iPad screen and see a twelve-sided, THREE DIMENSIONAL object. Aw fuck, I'm an idiot.", "summary": "Tried to make my six year old draw a dodecahedron. Didn't know it was three dimensional. Made my kid cry and feel like a loser. Now both of us feel like losers."}
{"id": "t3_207w7c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] wonders if my [22F] gf is overly sensitive, or if i'm not being sensitive enough, and if our relationship is not worth continuing.", "post": "I've been in a relationship for 6 months now.  It started out great but lately things have been a little rocky.  She is extremely critical of me (how I dress, if I say something grammatically incorrect (she's always correcting me!), my posture, my taste in music, if I blow bubbles with my gum in an audience of people, if I accidentally let the door close on her if I'm walking through it first, if if i dont cuddle with her in the morning when i'm trying to sleep). I'm a lot more thick-skinned and calm.  She on the other hand is extremely sensitive and emotional, and doesn't take criticism well.  So it's as if she expects me to be extremely sensitive to her while she doesn't afford me the same consideration and sensitivity.  She has anxiety issues and has walked out on me from places because I said I couldn't stay with her the whole weekend due to work I needed to get done.  She can go from very happy to crisis on seemingly minor issues.  She always complains about her weight (she's about 40 lbs. overweight) but not once have I said anything less than she's beautiful.  I've never told her she needed to lose weight.  Tonight I told her, in general terms not even directed at her, that people who complain about their weight, or who are overweight, should stop complaining all the time and take steps and do something about it because at least on some level weight and health is in their control.  You don't like it?  DO something about it.  She got extremely upset, and hung up on me.  Was I being insensitive?", "summary": "Gf is overly critical, yet extremely sensitive to criticism.  Complains about her weight all the time, yet does nothing about it."}
{"id": "t3_177f45", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help me [32m] with [30f] who has lost trust", "post": "I fucked up.  Again.  I lied about the last time I checked a girl's profile.  Someone I used to talk to and stopped talking to once I started dating her.  Someone younger than me.  A few weeks ago, she found the truth about the nature of my relationship with her back then (all over text) and just last night she asked me when the last time I checked her profile was.  I lied and said it was a month or two ago, when it was closer to a week ago.  I didn't even think about it.  I just kneejerk lied, because I thought the truth would be worse.\n\nShe cried her eyes out.  She hates me.  She thinks I'm a piece of shit.  We're just about to get a new place together and she agreed to live with me under a \"domestic partnership\" until she can figure something out.  But, she's the love of my life.   I can't lose her.  I wanted to go all the way with her (married, babies).  What can I do?  I'm glad she's at least living with me so maybe there's some chance that she'll trust me again, but I don't know.  She fuckin hates me right now and I don't blame her.  I lied again.  I hurt her.  Again. \n\nHelp", "summary": "I'm 32m and she is 30f.  We have been together almost 3 years and have had a long distance relationship for almost all of that time.  We just moved in together in November"}
{"id": "t3_2smdwv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] at a crossroads between two girls, both [19 F]", "post": "I am a university student and have a decision to make between two girls, and as I see it, two different lives I could live. \n\n This first girl, named Victoria is studying music and is a very talented singer. Although I'm biased, I really think she'll be a famous singer one day. She has a rich family and they go on adventures to different countries every year and live on the wild side of things. We dated in high school a bit but things didn't work out because we where both immature and she didn't like commitment. She's interested in a relationship with me now however.\n\n There is also another girl, named Katrina, she is studying nursing. We have gone on a few dates but things aren't yet really committed. She's very sweet but and lacks a lot of self confidence, which I apparently help her with. She is quiet and churchgoing, and doesn't really like to be particularly social and prefers reading and watching flims, or going for a jog by herself.\n\n So my problem, who do I choose? I'm not counting on either of them lasting to marriage or whatever (not to say I would doubt it, just, I don't know), but I feel like by choosing, I'm choosing the kind of lifestyle I will end up living. Either one filled with adventure in which I will tour the world with super star singers and go mountain climbing in Russia or a life that is simple, and I fill it with my wife's company and we have a couple of kids and a nice house and not needing to go on massive adventures because we are content just with each other.\n\n I know I'm young, and that a lot more is to come, but this decision has a feeling about it like it will completely alter my entire future.\n\n If those of you experienced with life could tell me which opportunity they would take, I may be able to decide which path I should follow.\n\nThanks", "summary": "I need to decide between a girl that is destined to become a wonderful singer and have a life filled with adventure or a lovely girl that would lead me to a life filled with quiet content."}
{"id": "t3_3ghkwu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my Girlfriend [18F] of a little over a year are long distance and I need some advice on what to do.", "post": "So, I'm 20 and my girlfriend is currently 18 and I live in California and she lives in Chicago. We've never met before but we've been talking to each other every day for the past year or so now and we both know we're real people, so there's no doubt about that. We've FaceTimed and have had phone calls with each other just about every night we can. \n\nAs a 20 year old male I have recently started my career and wish to see her as soon as I possibly can. Would this be a smart idea? I was later down the road planning to move out there while she finishes up college and such since I've already finished my schooling and I've wanted to leave California anyways. It's going to be somewhat costly to go out there and pay for a round trip plane ticket, a room and food. I've estimated that the trip will cost just about around $500-$600 but I really think she's worth every penny of it. \n\nWould this be smart to do at my current age?", "summary": "in love with a girl 2020 miles away and need help deciding if it would be smart to go and see her for 3 days."}
{"id": "t3_3x4gr8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend (20) isn't supportive or there for me (20 F) when I have a lot on or I'm upset", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 4 years now. Over the past months, he has had a lot of stress with his new start up business, and had a few cash problems. I can honestly say I have been there 100%, supporting him, hugging him if he's down, I even printed off flyers and posted them around my area to help business. \n\nHowever, in the last week or so I've been really struggling with my own problems. It came to my attention that we would always focus on what's going on with him and he would never ask me how I'm doing genuinely. \n\nI spoke to him about this last night as we argued and I realised I was taking a lot of my emotions out on him. I started to cry when I said this time last year my grandma (whom I was very close to) was dying in hospital + I am experiencing a lot of stress and pressure with my mum, dad & my dad's new girlfriend (completely other story.) He preceded to get very angry with me saying \"fair enough your grandma passed away yeah but you can't take it out on me.\" I apologised and I said I just really need him here right now like I am for him, which made me cry a bit more.\" he then said \"STOP CRYING! You've made me really angry and now you're crying to try and make me stop.\"\n\nThis was really hurtful for me. I have been very upset and being told my tears were manipulative hurt so much. I've felt quite awkward today with him. It's just so confusing when every time I'm upset, the situation still needs to be focused on him. Either because he ALSO has things going on or because he just brings the focus back onto him.\n\nI am finding it hard suppressing my emotions and them being undermined by somebody who is supposed to love me.\n\nHow can I deal with this situation?", "summary": "I am always there for my boyfriend in his hard times, but the focus still has to be on him when I'm upset and I feel undermined and neglected."}
{"id": "t3_4vwtje", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16F] lost my virginity to my boyfriend [16M] and the two times we had sex he made it all about me and did not let me do anything to him. How do I ask him to", "post": "Hi so I have never used Reddit before. I have read the guide for submitting so I will hopefully be good. This is probably a really simple solution I am just having trouble seeing it.\n\nMy boyfriend had a girlfriend before me and he has some experience from that relationship. I have never been in a relationship before now and I have only had sex twice. My boyfriend is really outgoing, loud, popular at school and I am the exact opposite.\n\n I am to too shy. Which I am it's a major flaw I have I am always really timid to ask people for things. I have always been and I don't know why. Even if I know the person super well I am always to shy to ask something of them.\n\nI lost my virginity to him several days ago and we had sex again last night. He made it a very enjoyable experience but he made it all literally about me. He did not really let me do anything to him and he focused on me the entire time.\n\nI know this is probably a simple solution but I can't see it, how do I ask him to let me do some things to him?", "summary": "I lost my virginity to my boyfriend and he keeps making sex all about me. How can I ask him to let me do some things to him"}
{"id": "t3_11bdmt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "GF (23F) broke up with me (25M) and is telling everyone I broke up with her. What should I do?", "post": "We had been together for over 2 years.\n\nI've seen her on FB basically telling everyone she is devastated because I broke up with her. I have been tempted to \"correct\" her since she is still on my friends list and we have mutual friends but I have restrained myself every time.\n\nWhat it ultimately came down to was her wanting to stay friends and keep me in her life but not be in a relationship anymore. I refused with that setup and I guess I am now the \"bad guy\" and broke up with HER. Has anyone dealt with a similar situation before? Any advice? Thank you.", "summary": "GF broke up with me and is telling everyone I broke up with her. Should I bother trying to set the record straight??"}
{"id": "t3_2vw494", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24M] don't want to lose this girl [23F]", "post": "I have been talking with this girl for a few months, I met her at work but she no longer works there. In the beginning it went great and I thought we really hit it off and I asked her to be my girlfriend. She said she likes me but she wasn't ready for a relationship and she told me her ex was abusive. She has constantly told me how she is heartbroken and isn't ready. I want to be there for her but she keeps pushing me away and her texts get really unresponsive. I don't know what to do. She keeps saying I deserve someone better and that I want to be with someone that she can't become. But I don't like anyone else, I like her.", "summary": "Girl I like isn't ready for relationship but likes me. Should I wait for her or should I leave her alone?"}
{"id": "t3_1ef7l7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I want to tell him how I feel. Help me please, Reddit!!", "post": "I guess you'd like some background information on me/the bf. I would describe our relationship as \"the best friends\" because I can say literally anything and he accepts it's dorkiness and awkwardness. We have been together for over a year now, and honestly, between you and me Reddit, I want to be with him for years. No, we have not said \"I love you\" yet, as he has told me he is hesitant and wants to wait as to be 100% certain, even though we are each others firsts, both sexually and gf/bf-wise. \nSo as most 16-year-old highschool girls, I am in a wonderful relationship with my boyfriend. Also as most highschool girls, I feel as though our feelings are mutuall and will carry on throughout the vastness of 'forever'.\nBut, I'm skeptical. I have, on previous (though fleeting) encounters with members of the opposite sex and with countless \"BFF\"s, felt the similar \"love\" I have with my boyfriend, but it always ended badly.  I'm skeptical in the sense that I DON'T want this to end badly. \nI do love my boyfriend, don't get me wrong, but I don't know how to say it without me feeling like that weird, clingy, gross gf that everyone hates. \nI want us to be definitely real and true. I just don't know how I should say it. This is obviously nerve-wracking and I just need advice. Help:(", "summary": "the bf and I have been together for 1+. I want to say \"I love you\", but don't know how or if I should, even."}
{"id": "t3_3abqy0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] and my girlfriend [20 F] of 4 months, just said goodbye and won't see each other for 6-12 months. We are deeply in love and I'm having a hard time staying emotionally intact during this transition into a LDR.", "post": "I just came back from the airport where I said goodbye to my girlfriend of 4 months. She is going back to her home country to start university and I am going far abroad for a university exchange which lasts 12 months. This is not a break-up because we still very much want to be together but because of important things going on in our lives, that gets complicated.\n\nThere is a chance that we could see each other around Christmas time, so about 6-7 months from now, but that is still incredibly far away and I don't know how to deal with such a long wait or this situation as a whole.\n\nOf course I can only speak from my side, but I know that we are both deeply in love with each other but the foreseen (yes, we knew this was going to happen) circumstances mean that we both have to start one of the most important parts of our lives and go our separate ways.\n\nWe're both very excited to be starting the things we are, but at the same time extremely sad to be leaving each other (almost unbearably so).\n\nIt's hard to explain exactly why our relationship works so well but I want to know what I can do now. We are going to continue to be in touch and hope to start again some day (in any form, be it as a couple or just good friends). I told her just before I let her go that we're just putting this all on 'pause', not stopping it completely \u2013 kind of like a video tape. I hope this is realistic and I'm a bit scared and feel sort of lonely now without her constantly around.\n\nI need tips on how to effectively stay in touch and keep this going please, as well as some help on keeping my chin up during this crappy time.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I won't see each other for 1 year. We still love each other a lot, want to start again some day. Not sure how to deal with this transition into long distance relationship."}
{"id": "t3_2voqzc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22 M] gf [20 F] of two months went to a naked photo shoot even if it makes me uncomfortable. I need a new perspective.", "post": "I met her before New Years and we hit it off, after a week we moved in together. We're both very sexually liberal (we have sex on cam for money sometimes). \n\nShe talked about doing naked photo shoots and I was supportive (I've seen previous pictures from her past and it's great). She had told me that she would sometimes have sex with the photographers (in the past) and so I figured I would be a lot more comfortable if I came. She thought it was a good idea.\n\nWell, she just left without me. She changed her mind because she thought she would be too giggly and would be distracted. So my question, did she dismiss my emotions over something reasonable?\n\nAlso, she just told me she invited her friend over and said that I should keep her company while she's gone.", "summary": "my girlfriend went to a naked photo shoot alone even after I told her I would be more comfortable if I came. Her reason for wanting to be alone is because I would distract her."}
{"id": "t3_38kytn", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Road Trip with the Pup. Help!", "post": "I'm going on a road trip with my family to the Carolinas and I hate leaving my dog (almost 2 years old, ~75lbs), so I'm thinking about bringing her with me. However I've never traveled with a pet so I'm not sure how feasible this is.\nI was originally going to find a dog sitting place where I can board her there for the week but it would be nice if I can take her with me. What advice do people who have travelled with pets have?\n\n**Length of trip:** ~<1 week (Wed-Mon)\n**Places:** (1) Charleston, SC\n                   (2) Asheville, NC \n\nMy plan for now if I decide to bring her:\n**Charleston, SC:** I've found some pet friendly restaurants here, but I know Charleston is a foodie's paradise and I'd like to try some of the nice restaurants. So, I found a couple of doggie day cares who can watch her for a few hours, so I'll be able to eat at the famous restaurants and pick her up after. (Also, any suggestions for the best food in Charleston?) \nI'd have to find a pet friendly hotel, but that can't be too difficult in a touristy city like Charleston.\n\n**North Carolina:** The next part of the trip will be a drive to North Carolina so we can explore one of the waterfalls over there. From what I've read online, dogs are allowed at pretty much all of the trails and parks (except the Smoky Mountains) so I should be okay with that.\nI'm a bit more worried about finding accommodations here because we'll be up in the mountains and a lot of the places seem like smaller towns so I'm not sure how pet friendly the restaurants and all of that would be because there's not much online.\n\nI'm not worried about the drive, as she's done the drive from Ft. Lauderdale to Gainesville, FL (5 hrs) a few times. I'm more worried about accommodations and restaurants and other things we might want to do.", "summary": "Is it a good idea to travel with your dog? Any advice? Things I need to keep in mind? Or should I find a good boarding place that can take care of her for the week?"}
{"id": "t3_1vvife", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[19/m] Not sure how to go for this girl, how should I approach the situation?", "post": "**Background:**\n\nI've known this girl for about a year. We've talked casually from time to time - just at school, and did never meet outside school except at her party, which was cool.\n\n---\nWe both moved to the same city coincidentally (we're students). There's going to be a room available on her floor in a month, and I was interested in renting the room (since it's a major upgrade from where I live now).\n\nI said that I would like to see the room, and she invited me over to her place to see hers, and she offered to cook.\n\nI went there Tuesday and we both had a great time! We have a lot in common, and we had laughs about each others' stories :). \n\nAnd suddenly after I had to leave (she had to go to work), I immediately developed strong feelings for her.\n\nI just don't know how to approach this situation; how should I act to win her over?", "summary": "after hanging out and eating with a friend (who I've known for a year), I've suddenly developed strong feelings after finding out we got much in common. How should I deal with this situation to get a relation with her?"}
{"id": "t3_lix9c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I meet girl friends in College?", "post": "Dumb question, i know. I am just a spoiled/depressed 21 year old college student. Lost my job and gf about a month or two ago and removed a ton of contacts on facebook and in my phone of people I never talk to. There are a lot of cute girls at my college but I still have some shyness left from high school. I think I am pretty good looking compared to most guys and the way I dress looks good as well. I came off as a creeper in high school and have stopped since I started college. I need more friends because I only have a couple that I actually talk to often. I always go to this game room at my college where people come in to either hangout or work on homework and usually sit in the massage chair for a good half an hour. I want to talk to some of the girls in there but my shyness just gets in the way and I feel like I am invisible to everyone. I don't know how to strike up a conversation and I don't want to come off as a creep. Most of the girls i notice are either doing homework or messing around on their laptops and I don't want to bother them. I do love giving compliments but have yet to give them to any girls. I would also love a girlfriend with the same interests as me but I have tried dating website and only young girls or unattractive girls are into me which i think is weird. Even the nerds that talk about really geeky stuff have friends that are girls. Am i missing something?", "summary": "I want more friends but I am just a shy/depressed/spoiled 21 year old with no job and hardly any close friends."}
{"id": "t3_2y44h0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20 M] getting way to attached to [19 F]", "post": "Hey Everyone,\n\nI'm going to try to make this short cause ive got an exam tomorrow. I met a girl at a party about a month ago. We've been hanging out almost every weekend since. Last weekend we had sex (lost my virginity.) Probably too early, but whatever. We were talking, and I told her that I wanted a serious relationship not just a FWB kind of deal. She told me that she wasnt ready for a serious relationship, and she doesnt know what she wanted. \n\nThe thing is we have hung out after this, and every time we hang out i like her more and more. Last night, i even dreamt of her... Im trying to hold back my feelings and be cool about it, but its not working. When I daydream its mostly about her. I guess, im asking for advice regarding not getting attached because i know if this continues im just going to get hurt in the end.", "summary": "Met girl. Lost my virginity. Start develop feelings. She tells me she doesnt want anything serious. I cant stop thinking about her. How do I stop?"}
{"id": "t3_1s76qu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "[Serious] Men of Reddit, how to you view the development of your relationship/feelings towards your SO.", "post": "Okay, So today I was just thinking about my relationship with my boyfriend. I'm his first girlfriend (He's 28 and I'm 19, big age gap I know but we've never seen a problem with it, we both are mature and live on our own, etc) and from what he's told me he's just never known how to talk to girls. His friends have confirmed this. We've been dating for 4 months and he lives 5 minutes from me so we literally see each other almost every day. In the beginning, he always told me how amazing I was and how he was crazy about me. Now, I'm the only one who ever says those kinda of things. I know it isn't a big problem, because he shows he's caring in physical ways by making sure I'm taken care of, cuddling, etc. I stay the night at his place often and whenever I ask, he always says he wants me to stay. We have a great time together, and I always let him know that if he feels like we shouldn't hang out as much, then that's fine. He always seems to want to have me over and to spend time. Sex is great, I just feel like maybe our sexual relationship as developed further than our emotional one. So there's that. I'm sort of a shy person, but not when it comes to my feelings, I really do care for him and am head over heels for him. I let him know that, but for some reason, I expect at this point in our relationship feelings should be talked about more than I just telling him the occassional \"you mean the world to me\" or \"I'm crazy about you\" and him reciprocating it. I'm not talking about saying I love you, but you know there should be conversations about where the relationship is going.", "summary": "Feelings were said from both parties in the beginning, now it's only me. He still shows it in physical ways. "}
{"id": "t3_sef49", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Water weight.", "post": "Hi loseit. I've been a lurker here for a while, it's a great place to come to when you feel like you need some motivation to keep on track. I'm not looking to lose as much weight as many people here I think, but the method is the same.\n\nI'm a 5'10\", 19 year-old female, and since last August I've gone from my highest weight of 164 and dropped around ~12 lbs using myfitnesspal. It's been rather slow-going for me since every so often I tend to go over my calorie limit for a couple days before getting back on track, but I think overall I end up with more days where I've eaten my goal amount or I'm under my maintenance calories rather than over.\n\nHowever, it's started to get to the point where I'm getting frustrated, because I just can't seem to get any lower. For nearly the past 2 months I've been wavering between ~154-152 lbs, and it seems that any time I just start to think I'll be making progress, I regain those couple pounds I think I've dropped.\n\nThis morning was very discouraging, because after weighing in at 152.4 lbs last week, I stepped on the scale to have it declare I was at 155.4.\n\nNow, I know that this is kind of silly, since in order to re-gain 3 whole pounds of fat, I would have to eat an excess of 10,500 calories, which I am *quite* certain I haven't done. I know it has to be water weight, but at the same time, it's really disappointing that all this water weight is being added onto my real weight. I mean, last week I must have had some water weight too, right? Yet it still said I was 3 lbs lighter. And the fact that it says so means that I probably haven't lost any fat either, otherwise even with water weight my overall weight would probably be less.\n\nI always weigh myself in the morning, after using the washroom and before eating anything, so that's not the problem. I just don't know what to do anymore to get myself out of this plateau I've been in. Does anybody have any advice or words of wisdom? I'd really appreciate it. :/", "summary": "Have been plateauing for almost 2 months after losing weight really slowly and now water weight is just making it look like I'm gaining again. Wat do??"}
{"id": "t3_2bwwck", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] and my boyfriend [18M] of one year, are breaking up before college, and I don't think I'm ready", "post": "We've been friends for about 4 years, and have been going out for 1. We decided to break up before college (we are going to be 3 hours apart) for various reasons, not wanting to be tied down and we felt that the relationship would probably end within our freshmen year.\n\nHowever, we both have a month left until we move in, and the thought makes me more and more upset by the day. This summer our relationship has just been amazing, emotionally and physically.\n\nThe part that kills me the most is having to leave something that is making me so incredibly happy.\n\nI guess what I'm looking for is just personal experience/advice with having to move on from a relationship that was good.", "summary": "My boyfriend and I are breaking up before college, and I'm having a really hard time thinking of having to leave a good relationship."}
{"id": "t3_evtr4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I recently learned I have three half-sisters from one of my fathers previous marriages 30 years ago. How do I go about finding information about them?", "post": "Back story:\n\nAbout a month ago I was over at my parents house and somehow the subject came up about my fathers previous marriages and his first date with my mother and he starts going on about how my mom loved the way he talked about his three little daughters but before I could ask anything my mother hushed him up so he wouldn't say anything more about the subject. I am 22 years old, so this would have happened about 8-10 years before I was born.\n\nNeedless to say I am more then a little curious and a little floored that I have three \"long-lost\" sisters. Judging by my fathers term \"little\" I assume they were born in the late 70's and extreme early 80's.\n\nHow do I go about finding more information about them? I would talk to my father about it but he isn't exactly one to talk about stuff in his past, the only reason he spilled the beans in the first place was because he was drunk, and I don't want him going ape shit over me asking what is a pretty decent question to ask. I am not trying to cause any trouble in my family or the family's of my three half-sisters, I am just curious about them.", "summary": "I have three half-sisters from my one of my fathers previous marriages, how do I go about finding information on them?"}
{"id": "t3_1p2pff", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Canada Tax Question - Common Law Relationships", "post": "I've been taking a tax course in university and I was thinking of ways to reduce my tax liability for the year. I had a good paid internship for most of the year so my income is fairly high and even though basic calculations have me receiving a refund for this tax year overall, it can still be increased.\n\nMy question is on common law relationships. Under my federal and provincial tax forms non-refundable credits can be claimed for a spouse or common law partner. For 2013 this will amount to 11,038 - the Net Income of said person. Technically I do not have a common law partner, just a long-term girlfriend who does not live with me (she lives at home and has very little income for 2013). If I were to claim her as a common law partner it would boost my refund by over 25% by my calculations. Would doing this be viable or is this something that can actually be audited by the CRA, what additional impact may this have on my return?\n\nIf you have any additional tax avoidance advice etc. for Canada that is also welcome! Especially thoughts that are not fairly obvious (like RRSP contributions).\n\nCheers,", "summary": "Can I claim my girlfriend as a common law spouse for increased non-refundable credits even though she is not technically. What might the CRA say/do if they were to audit?"}
{"id": "t3_2nn8f1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My wife [26 F] decided to tell me [ 25 M], after four years of marriage that she is bi-sexual. Now I feel I am not enough.", "post": "I want to keep this short. Earlier this week my wife of four years decided to tell me she is bi-sexual and is tired of having to suppress her desire to be with a woman. I need to note here that I have never said one way or the other that it is wrong, she just felt like it would upset me. We have had an open conversation about the situation, and out of my trying to respect her and wanting her to be herself I told her that where I was a little uncomfortable with it, if that's what she wanted then I will do my best to be okay with it. \n\nReality is, I am not really okay with the situation. She has offered to include me and the other girl in certain sexual acts which at first sounded like a great thing, but the more I think about it, the more I hate the idea. I have basically become bummed out, feeling that I am no longer enough to satisfy her, and I do not want to have an open relationship or whatever this is considered. The hard part is at the same time I don't want to deny her who she is, or be a dickhead and put some kind of boundary on her. Guess I'm just not sure what to do. Anyways thanks for reading. I know this is a pretty common thing.\n\nThe other biggest and hardest thing about all of this, is my wife has a girl she is interested in already. She was honest about meeting her and everything, and is already arranging to meet up with the other girl. I've read some of the text messages and they are more flirtatious, more loving, and more exciting than anything I ever get from my wife. This is where my heart broke. Now I feel stupid.", "summary": "Wife decided to tell me she is bisexual after four years of marriage and wants a girlfriend. Now I feel lost, not good enough, and am unsure about my relationship."}
{"id": "t3_2umi75", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (29f)Need some advice about an ex (30m)", "post": "Ok reddit just looking for some quick advice. Have an ex of 7 years currently dating my bf now for 6. Lately ive been having doubts and feeling just generally confused about the course my life is on.\n\nI started dating my ex in high school and we were in love. This was my first love and i thought we were going to get married. We were young dumb, both good looking people, and eventually we let people get in between us. We were young, dumb and in love. Also, super jealous over each other. Relationship was toxic..had to walk away.\n\nI love my bf now so much and we' ve been together a long time but he doesnt seem to be in any rush to get married. It hurts because up until about a year ago my ex always tried to get me back. Always told me he knew 100% im the one. My bf now doesnt ever tell me this...\n\nLong story short my ex recentely met a girl. They had a baby :( 4 months ago he told me im still the one and the baby was something that happened. Now stupid facebook/ instagram, cant help but creep. Lately, feeling like i made a big mistake. We use to live together, grew up together, and he was my first love.", "summary": "should i msg my ex happy birthday (secretly kind of miss him want to initiate casual catch up convo). Have a bf i love and he has a live in gf and baby moms."}
{"id": "t3_yskum", "subreddit": "self", "title": "My parents want to give back my dog to the shelter and I'm really sad.", "post": "Just 2 weeks ago, my family and I went to a shelter for rescued pets and got a 1 year old cockapoo. Ever since he got home, we (mostly me) have been training him everyday. Since he just got neutered when he got home, he felt very insecure and would bark at anybody who would come in the house, room, etc. That was the time when my parents, siblings and I had a talk about the dog. My parents didn't want him because they thought he was a threat to our family and might bite one of us eventually. That was the first reason why they wanted to give him back to the shelter UNTIL, my dad became attached to him and gave him a second chance (which didn't last very long btw). So then, my dad gave him a week, and he stopped barking at us. after that week, we decided to keep him but just today my mom called everyone again and had a talk about the dog. My mom and dad want him back in the shelter again since he kept peeing, pooping and making messes inside the house. My mom was very stressed and I said it was okay to give him back. Tonight I kept crying and the dog is still here. That just tells me what will happen later on when he is gone. I just want someone to give me advice on how to not be sad about this without forgetting about him. I would really appreciate it. Thank you", "summary": "My parents want to give my dog back to the shelter and I'm fine with it but I'm still really sad. Can someone give me advice on how to not be sad about this without forgetting about the dog?"}
{"id": "t3_4rfdmq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My fiancee's (24 fm) grandpa (92m) complained about the rental property I (25 m) bought with her... while we weren't even there", "post": "My fiancee and I (24 and 25) bought an investment property recently in a C neighborhood in Philadelphia.  Costs 70k, piti is 489, and we collect 1250 a month in rent.  So were cash flowing pretty damn well, have had no problems getting rent, and besides a bed bug issue no maintenance issues.  \n\nWell, on Sunday, we went out with my fiancees grandparents for lunch.  They are old, wealthy wasps.  on the ride up, my fiancee's mom mentioned that the last time she went out to lunch with them (with two other members of their family) her grandpa had a fit about our rental property. \n\n He was amazed that my fiancees parents would \"let us\" buy a property in Port Richmond (the neighborhood in philly), that it was a crime infested hell hole and that we were in over our heads.  The other two family members had to calm him down apparently, as they both were more familiar with Port richmond and knew that while its not the Hamptons, its not a horrible place and has started gentrifying.  \n\nMy main issue is the fact that her grandpa was essentially attacking a decision that we had both heavily researched, and has been working out fine, without either of us present to defend it, or give him the concrete facts.  Actually i'm having a hard time figuring out how that even came up without us there.  Am I over reacting or is he crossing a line?", "summary": "Fiances grandpa complaining about our decision to buy a rental property while were not there, crossing a line or no?"}
{"id": "t3_2rxw6x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [20m] and I [20F] have only been dating for 4 months, but I want to know if he wants kids, without creeping him out.", "post": "We met via okcupid (10/10 would recommend), and I didn't even think to look then about his 'children' preferences. Recently I revisited his page and saw that he had put 'doesn't want kids' on his profile summary. \n\nI really, really want kids someday, so seeing this, especially since we have both exchanged \"I love you\"s, was quite discouraging. Now, there's no saying that we'll even be together when the time comes to start having children. I think, though it might be disastrous to avoid talking about this for too long.\n\nSo how do I bring this up to him? I don't want to scare him off by bringing it up, but it's imperative to me to have kids. If it becomes clear that he doesn't want children under any circumstances, should we break up, or just acknowledge that we have an expiration date?", "summary": "I want children, it would appear that he does not. How do I bring it up? and what should we do if we don't want the same thing?"}
{"id": "t3_3s5ezj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18F] am newly in an LDR with my boyfriend [20M] of 1.5 years, what are some common pitfalls of LDRs / nice things to do for each other while we're apart?", "post": "I am at Oxford University and he is at Edinburgh University. We just almost broke up after two months apart and while we know what went wrong (lack of communication, lack of experience at the distance thing, him being in a bad mental place, etc) and we're more in love now than ever, I would really appreciate some advice of little things we can do for each other while we're apart. I miss him, I talk to him a lot. I know relationships often don't survive this but I think we have a good shot at it, it's been so fantastically easy since I started dating him and we go really well together. We almost never argue, and that's not the 'too scared to confront each other' non-arguing, it's the 'we just tend to be on the same page with shit and can just chat about it' non-arguing. It's just that we're so young and it's difficult and we're always busy, and I want to make sure that if I lose this, it's in the knowledge I did everything I could to keep it.", "summary": "What are the common mistakes people make in LDRs? And what are some ideas I can add to our texts / skype chats etc to keep things interesting when we get busy / drained etc?"}
{"id": "t3_18qb6q", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Probably gonna get passed over for another promotion at work...", "post": "The time comes again, I have been with the same company for almost four year. When I started working there I thought it was going to be a decent job and I would have no problem working my way up. I was dead wrong.\n\nAll the people I worked with know I have a four year degree in marketing and management.\n\nI have applied for various posistions throughout the company, including the headquarters. All turned down, with no reason as to why. I had talked with higher levels of management to be promoted so I can actually use my education for a change. Nope, just took a rookie two years younger than me and threw him in with a HS education.\n\nWell fuck me right?\n\nNow it is gonna happen again, I was told when I transfered locations I would recieve a promotion as agreeded upon. Two months later still nothing, but now they tell me I have an interview tomorrow (18th) for the posistion was passed up for. This coming only for the second time changing the date I was supposed to interview. Best part is they don't even seem excited to promote within.\n\nI know that there are people out there who have experience working as a manager, but to basically be tossed around like a sack of taters is really pissing me off. There have been people in this same company who were hired then promoted not but a month later.\n\nI HAVE A DAMN EDUCATION IN BUSINESS PEOPLE, I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING! I am tired of playing along to your games. This is the last damn time. I have worked just as hard as people two levels above me, gone out of my way to show dedication, and have done everything possible to get you more satisfied customers who want to remain loyal to the company.", "summary": "my company is about to pass me up for promotion after other members have already been promoted. If not, back to only my level of work will be done, nothing more."}
{"id": "t3_36pbjy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by potentially ruining my boyfriend's future proposal.", "post": "A bit of background: my boyfriend's Mom died 4 years ago of cancer, and I never got to meet her. His Dad says I am a lot like her, and wants his son and I to get married so badly. One day, probably 8 months ago, his Dad showed me his wife's wedding ring and we talked about their wedding/marriage, etc.\n\nSo I've seen the ring multiple times, I think it's beautiful, and my boyfriend's Dad told him to keep it in his drawer because his Dad is a crazy old man and thinks he will misplace it. My boyfriend had been trying to \"throw me off the scent\" (which I didn't know until later) by saying when he proposes, he's not sure yet if he will use his Mom's ring or a new one. So, naturally, I didn't think it mattered if I saw the ring a few times, or talked about other rings.\n\nI told my best friend about him potentially proposing with his Mom's ring and she thinks it's sweet but that I should have my own since we are \"our own relationship\". I disagree, but she makes an interesting point, so I bring up her point to my boyfriend to get his thoughts (thinking that maybe that's why he is considering using a different ring).\n\nWell shit. My boyfriend gets all upset and says that I wouldn't have brought this new-ring idea to him if I didn't think I should have my own, and that I should know how much the ring means to him and his family, and now half the surprise is ruined because I'll be mad if he gets a new ring (thinking it would be out of spite) but I won't be surprised if I see his mom's ring.\n\nSo, I effectively ruined a future proposal... innocently, but still.", "summary": "Saw boyfriend's mom's wedding ring too many times (which he likely will propose with), he got mad and said I ruined half of the surprise of the proposal."}
{"id": "t3_2bbbz0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my crush [20 F] 1 year, Relationship", "post": "So i'm really crazy about this girl, lets call her Z, last year I told her how i feel about her, but here is the catch, her best friend likes me, sadly i dont like her, so call it a love triangle. This girl Z said that if she were to date me it would be a slap to the face to her friend. so i backed off, now fast forward a year later, the girl Z has been txting me about why i liked her last year, and I told her the truth and i asked her, \"so do you like me or not\" and she brushed that question off like it was nothing and again she asks me \"if we were to date what would it be like\" i told her it would be like a normal date type\n\nand guess what excuse she pulled this time....\"ooo my friend still likes you and it would be a slap to the face if i went out with you, also i'm not ready for a relationship, BUT MAYBE ONE DAY ..IDK RIGHT NOW\"\n\nO MY FUNDGE CAKES!!! \n\nany advice? do you guys think she likes me? \nthis is depressing...o and she told her friends about it....fml", "summary": "told a girl how i felt about her,got turned down, year later she asks why i liked her....got turned down.."}
{"id": "t3_1c29x1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [22m] continue to date her [21] long distance?", "post": "I've been dating my girlfriend for over three years now. I love her because she's amazing. She's Indonesian, but speaks perfect English. She's beautiful, she has a very bright personality, she has a bachelor's degree in chemical engineering, she cooks me dinner, she loves me to death and we have great sex.\n\nLong term (marriage) looks like a green light. She's smart with money, she's financially secure, she loves kids (she wants to be a housewife). My family likes her, I've never met her family.\n\nBut come this fall she's going to be working her first job in Ohio and I'm going to attend graduate school in Minnesota to get my PhD in Physics (for the next ~5.7 years). I will be unimaginably busy (if I want to pass) so I won't be able to talk to her every night. We will be much less involved in each other's daily lives.\n\nOn top of this I've only ever dated 2 women in my life; I've been single only for ~2 months of the last 6.5 years! I feel like I'm ready to be single and this would be a natural time to split but I wonder if I'll never meet a girl like her again.\nIt's very hard for me to make this decision. Any thoughts?", "summary": "I'm happy with my relationship now but this fall we will forced to live in different states. Should we try long distance?"}
{"id": "t3_4jqrad", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] of 1 year, disclosed sexual partners, and its making me feel upset/angry/weird", "post": "I met my girlfriend last year whilst travelling in Thailand with some mates. I met her, along with her friends on the beach and got along quite well. Later that evening we all went out together, and I ended up sleeping with my future girlfriend. At the time, this felt like a usual one night stand, but we continued to talk after she added me on Facebook and we met again back in the UK and started dating.\n\nWe still get on great, and even though it is a long distance relationship (both at University) I feel satisfied and happy.\n\nSeveral weeks ago, we had a conversation about out past sexual partners. Turns out she has only had one long term boyfriend and then nothing until she went to Thailand. Whilst travelling, she admitted to sleeping with four guys on one night stands (including me). She said she slept with one guy after meeting me and whilst we were still talking a lot.\n\nFor some reason this really bummed me out and made me feel awkward. Over the last few weeks I kind of accepted it but recently its playing on my mind again. I don't like the fact that four out of her five sexual partners were one night stands, especially when done in such a short time scale on holiday. I don't know, I don't want to upset her but I just find it hard to think about and makes me feel as if she was 'easy' and would go back with any random bloke during the holiday. I understand that I can't think this way, but the whole thing just makes me feel upset. Also, the fact that she slept with someone after me makes me feel even worse. I just feel as if the way we met isn't special at all, in-fact it makes me feel a bit awkward thinking about the way we met.\n\nI don't really know how to handle my thoughts and emotions about the whole thing, because everything else in our relationship is fine and I don't want it to interfere.", "summary": "Getting upset about my girlfriends previous four one night stands in Thailand where we met. Struggling to settle my feelings of frustration, anger and jealousy."}
{"id": "t3_153uqk", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Kittens! *cough* not really, this is a cry for help! and a bit of a rant, sorry about that!", "post": "so I am unsure if this is the correct subreddit for this! (or even if that is how you spell subreddit...) but I shall go on regardless! \n\nso basically this will be my last few years summarised in a neat and comic book esq flavour.\n\nIt all began in school, our hero discovered super powers for passing exams without any effort from his side! A's were flying everywhere, sure he was depressed but damn it he was passing everything with flying colours.\n\nthen came college, yet still he passed through it... scraping by on low grades but never actually failing anything!\n\nso to university we fly! and then *BLAM* *POW* comes the double punch of hard work and mental disorders catching up on him (no coincidence there at all ;] ) so he is kicked out for not attending/failing courses\n\n6 months later... the hero has applied for work all around but nothing can be found! he deals with customers poorly thanks to his fantastic mental prowess! the jobs that he is good at all need university qualifications and the few companies who provide training have a few zillion applicants.\nthe mental conditions are being dealt with through this clever thing called 'communication' and a few select choices of western medicine.\nthe social life is down the drain as his friends and girlfriend all got tired of his 'constantly being a downer' and so the hero is left with but one loyal side-kick\nA return to university seems impossible for he is poor! from a lower class background! and only bursaries saved him last time!\n\nso what is the hero to do? is hope gone? will their be a heroine to save the day? to find out stayed tuned in for next years edition of 'teenage genius gone bad'!\n\n*cough", "summary": "I feel like there are no options out there for me, friends have all jumped ship. Mental issues are getting better but life issues are getting worse (ironic no?)"}
{"id": "t3_2fu3ll", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [22M] help my now ex-gf [23F] through her (what I think is) depression?", "post": "Hi reddit I need some advice. My gf of 3 months and best friend of over a year finally broke up with me today after being massively distant for a while. I saw it coming and have had time to make my peace with it, but I'm still into her.\n\nThe thing is, she still likes me (in that way) and has said so many times. She's admitted to me that she just can't deal with anything right now, and hates hurting me. I told her over and over that I will wait for her and how I feel about her. She said she feels the same but just needs to be alone. \n\nAnd before I come off like a creeper, I made sure to give her plenty of chances to tell me if I was the problem or if she didn't like me that way, and that I would leave her alone.\n\nShe's admitted to me that she is never hungry and always tired, but can't sleep and is sick of feeling terrible all the time. This has been going on for a month and a half, and she's had bouts before. \n\nI told her I thought it may be depression, and she agreed. I tried to convince her, without pressuring, to seek help, as we both know it's a chemical as well as physical problem. I told her it's not her fault and that I still wanted to be with her and help her through it.\n\nShe still broke up with me, so I told her I wouldn't text or call, but that she absolutely shouldn't hesitate to contact me and that I'll always be there for her. I'll honour that, but I'm worried about her, and I'm pretty sure I'm the only one she has told. Is there anything I can do to help her?", "summary": "My now ex-gf of three months is still into me but suffers mental health issues; how can I help her without smothering her?"}
{"id": "t3_2h386l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (36F) husband (45M) of 6 years told me he doesn't love me anymore and is moving out and that his daughter (my stepdaughter) is the main reason.", "post": "We have had a really stressful summer with our son (5) in and out of the hospital, moving and money issues stemming from his job. Just last week he quit and started another with better pay.  And to top it all off his daughter has had some promiscuous behavior we have been dealing with lately as well, and she's only 14.  I have a daughter (13) who is just generally a goody goody and never gets in trouble for anything. \n\nHe said his daughter is no longer happy here and they went to stay at his sisters for the weekend. Now he says she is staying there indefinitely and that he is back home for one night. He did not contact us all weekend, even though I made several attempts.  It really hurts that he didn't even try to contact our son.\n\nHe did this once before, 3 years ago. He was fired from a job, we struggled a few months and when he got a new one it required a move 7 hours away. So we were packing and giving our exes the proper notice when he told me he didn't want us to come. We were moving in 2 weeks.  I was upset and crying and begging him not to go, but he did, with his daughter. Then a month later, called me and said he made a mistake and he did love me, and we moved too.\n\nNow its like deja vu.  I guess he's here to talk to me.  I don't want to. I don't want this to be over. I love him. He is a very loving man usually. And I remember 3 years ago he was so cold to me. I don't think I can take it.\n\nI feel like my best bet is to talk him into marriage counseling.  But I don't know if he will. I do not have anyone here that I feel close enough to talk to about this and his mom and sister both live here.  I feel so alone and scared.\n\nHow do I get myself through this again and what do I tell my daughter?  What do I tell our son? Will counseling help.", "summary": "My husband of 6 years wants to leave with his daughter, says he doesn't love me anymore. We have a son together and I have a daughter too. He has done this once before."}
{"id": "t3_elx06", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Isn't buying a bunch of toys for \"Baby's First Christmas/Hanukkah/etc.\" kind of pointless?", "post": "REDDITORS WITH CHILDREN: Your opinion is much appreciated!\n\n**To preface this**: I'm not trying to offend anyone or call buying gifts for an infant unintelligent or anything along those lines.\n\nI worked at a toy store for a few years in a rather rich neighborhood, and Christmas was always ridiculous.  Parents would come into the store in a frenzy, seemingly grabbing everything on the shelves, and sometimes spending upwards of $2,000.  As they were waiting for us to ring them up and wrap their gifts (free gift wrapping service - so frustrating), we would often hear that this was their child's \"first Christmas,\" meaning that the child was less than one year old.", "summary": "Am I the only one that thinks that buying an inordinate amount of gifts for someone too young to even understand what's going on is pointless?*"}
{"id": "t3_212cxu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my boyfriend [20M] of four months, I'm not attracted to him physically but he's an amazing guy and the sex is great. Should I break up?", "post": "I met this guy following a breakup with my first boyfriend, after a year long relationship. I was never initially attracted to him but 5 months later, after I'd moved on from my ex, we began to see each other. I'm so attracted to his personality, he's interesting and driven. Everything that my ex lacked; maturity, motivation, good communication, spontaneity (all the things that we broke up over) he has. He's also sexually amazing and is not living or dependant on his parents, unlike most 20-year-olds.\n\nMy only problem is that he is nowhere near as attractive as my ex and I physically don't feel anything. My ex, however, was exceptionally, unfairly attractive (one that most girls are always talking about) and a decent guy, but very flawed. I couldn't get enough of him and to me he was perfect.\nBut now, I am constantly getting friends telling me that I am too good for my new boyfriend and can do better. That I have \"really lowered my standards\". (I'm really not \"better\" but they don't understand how great of a guy he is). \n\nIt's not that I don't enjoy having sex with him. The opposite. We started off as friends with benefits. But I'm never suffocating with lust when I see him like I use to be with my ex, loving every part of him.\n\nI feel so shallow but can't stop comparing them both. I really want to feel something physical for him.", "summary": "Current boyfriend not attractive but an exceptional guy. Ex extremely attractive. Physical feelings have not evolved in time. Break up?"}
{"id": "t3_3hznoh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] need some advice from the women of reddit: Have you ever dumped a guy, but took him back later? If so, what did he do to make you take him back?", "post": "So long story short, my GF [25f] broke up with me about a month ago. \n\nWe had been together for just over a year. We were happy, we went on dates, we had good sex, we went on holiday together, and we never argued.  So as you can imagine, i was in complete shock when she dumped me.\n\nWe met up a few days later and she was in tears, saying that she has had doubts about our future together, and then she told me that she had been talking to another guy that she liked, and she didn't want to cheat on me, so instead she dumped me.\n\nNow, i know it sounds pathetic, but i still want her back! I still love her. I'm trying to start dating again, and have a couple of dates lined up from Tinder, but deep down, i just want my ex back!\n\nNow living in the 21st century, the first thing i did was google 'how to get her back', and almost every article said not to beg for her back, or chase her, as this would drive her away further. \n\nThey say to use the No Contact rule for at least 3 weeks (the idea is to let things calm down, make her miss me, make her think about what i'm upto, etc). \n\nThey also say that 90% of the time, the 'other guy' is just a rebound, and won't last long. Is this true?\n\nSo its now week 2 of NC, and i'm still thinking about her.  \n\nSo my question to the women of reddit is, have any you ever taken your ex back after you dumped him (especially if you left him for someone else)? And what did he do to get you back?", "summary": "My GF [25f] left me [26m], as she had feelings for another guy. Do women ever go back to a guy they dumped? and what should i do?"}
{"id": "t3_dngz9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My wife has a strange reaction once and awhile that we've been unable to explain", "post": "Every so often my wife has a strange reaction to lemonade. She says it's happened with things other than lemonade - but lemonade seems to do it regardless. If she drinks too much of it - a relatively small amount - she experiences what she describes as 'acid veins' in her torso, head  and neck. It has lasted up to an hour and almost completely debilitates her. It's clearly very painful and makes her cry. The only thing that seems to help is drinking water, even though there's she describes no real sense of dehydration. \n\nI know the obvious answer is to avoid lemonade, but tonight it happened with apple juice, hasn't happened with apple juice before.\n\nShe's spoken with her doctor about it to no avail. Has anyone else had similar experiences? Is this a sign of diabetes? She can drink other types of juice - and considerable amounts of them - without any similar reaction.", "summary": "My wife drinks lemonade and feels like acid is flowing through her veins. She has since avoided lemonade but tonight it happened with apple juice."}
{"id": "t3_3nrmui", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26F] with my very new, maybe relationship [27 M] 4 dates in, found out he is a virgin and don't know how I feel.", "post": "Hello, \n\nJust recently started dating a guy. He is very sweet, kind and gentle. He is also attractive, smart and has a nice physique. When I first met him, I was a little bit intimidated.\n\nWe have been on four dates and he revealed to me that he is a virgin. I am not- I have been in two ltr's and had a few casual sexual encounters- lots of intercourse had...\n\nAs soon as he told me, i immediately thought of him as less masculine...and I feel terrible about it. I hate that I feel this way and I don't want to feel it, but I like a man who takes charge in bed and I feel weird being his first and possibly having to be 'nurturing' sexually.\n\nI still want to see him...I refuse to let this be a deal breaker. But can someone please tell me what I am in for? How should I handle this?  \nHe seems to lack confidence at time when we kiss or do anything intimate and seems very nervous, and I want to let him know to take charge and be more confident with me.\n\nIt's not so much the virginity that is an issue for me, it's the lack of confidence that seems to come along with it, and I need my man to be confident. I really like him and can see it going somewhere....just looking for thoughts advice and tips.", "summary": "New guy i'm seeing is a 27 yr old virgin, and I am not a virgin. I don't know how to proceed. Looking for tips, advice etc."}
{"id": "t3_xsmuj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I've had plans to move to Chicago with a friend set for the last 3 month. I just got a full-time job offer paying more than any other job I've had that would be great for my resume but I'd have to cancel the move. What should I do?", "post": "A little backstory. This is an indie game dev in Boston that I worked with start-to-finish as a QA Intern on a game in 2010. They just e-mailed me asking if I want to work on a port of that same game along with a new one that I had no part in.\n\nMy friend and I have had plans to move to Chicago, just for fun, for the last 3 months and we plan to leave Wednesday the 8th. \n\nI'm considering staying in Chicago for 2 weeks, beginning work in mid-late August and returning to live with my friend when the job ends in November. I'm 20 and this job would pay more than my last full time job (CSR @ a TAS).\n\nI can't decide what I should do. If you can offer advice it's greatly appreciated!", "summary": "Should I cancel a move to a new city with a friend to make some decent money in a resume building job for 3 months?"}
{"id": "t3_2mcqcy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22/F] need help with my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years [M/22].", "post": "I'm really in need of advice right now. I'm still inlove with my ex-boyfriend. We were each others first love. He was the most sweet kind caring man I knew. We talked about spending our lives together.\n\nAs the years went by we had our share of disagreements, no relationship is perfect 24/7. 3 years into us being together I had given him an ultimatum. I wasn't comfortable with him using recreational drugs. He agreed to stop for me. He continued to spend time with certain friends I did not like because of their partying and drug use. He would choose them over me.\n\nThis made me become bitter and resentful. I started to hate those people in his life because I felt like they meant more to him than I did. \n\nFlash forward to recent days, he's told me he lied and broke his promise to me. It went horribly. I said things I shouldn't have to him. I acted so childish. I did not handle being lied to for a years time well.\n\nBut here's the thing. I still love him, and I could forgive him and try to work things out. He said to me he would keep an open mind and give me a chance. Our fight and break up happened 3 months ago. He and I would talk and at times things felt good between us. \n\nNow there is another women. She is tossing herself at him. He has always had confident issues, so she makes him feel good about himself. I have always told him how sexy, hot, amazing he was. His lack of confidents didn't stem from me. But I feel like they are going to get together. I still love my ex deeply, I feel like he was the one for me and I cant let him go. Tomorrow night he is having a party, and that women is going. I'm scared something will happen between him and her. I wouldn't be able to forgive that.\n\nHe has stop answering my texts and isn't wanting to see me. I feel led on and used by him. Yet I still love him and want to be with him. I need advice please.", "summary": "How can I fix things with the man I love, and get a second chance after I have called down his friends?"}
{"id": "t3_3apt7m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20f] am not like any of my boyfriend's [25m] exes or crushes.", "post": "We've been together for 8 or 9 months now. I've slowly been getting to know all of his friends and the other night I finally met this one girl he'd been friends with since they were both ten. In the past boyfriend has told me that he had a big crush on her and while he was on leave from the military they went on a date and kissed but she decided she didn't want to ruin the friendship so it never advanced. I secretly think he still has a little puppy dog crush on her but that's a different story. \n\nAnyway, we went to her house for a game night and she was very...ditzy. Like those girls in middle school who pretend to be stupid because they think the boys like it. And it's okay, she was still very cool and I had a lot of fun. But then the next day boyfriend told me about one of his professors that he thought was super hot and when he described her it made me realize how different I was from all these girls he'd been attracted to (and his ex girlfriend). Most of them are blonde, have fake boobs, are super thin, kind of ditzy, they like to party and get stupid drunk.\n\nI'm not unattractive, I eat healthy and I work out a lot so I have a good figure and I take care of my body. I would say I'm average looking face wise and I'm okay with that. I'm also incredibly smart. I'm in school for engineering and I'm the biggest nerd. I feel like I'm the exact opposite of these girls. I'm tall, awkward around new people, I prefer getting drunk at home by myself than at a party, I have small boobs for my body size, I'm just not what he's historically been into. His ex girlfriend didn't have the perfect body either but she was kind of ditzy as well and more into parties than anything", "summary": "Boyfriend's exes and past crushes are superficial, bleach blond,party girls....and I am not any of those things."}
{"id": "t3_30zezd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [17/m] need help talking to my friend [17/m].", "post": "So I've known this particular friend for at least 6 years now, but we've only become better friends in this past year or so. I've always been hoping to become better friends with him, as I've recently learned we're way more similar than I had thought. However, he's a bit of a closed book when it comes to talking about anything personal with others (I can't blame him, I'm the same way.) \n\nHowever, the other night, I checked up on him because he had seemed upset. He ended up calling to me and venting about what had been happening to him. I felt honored that he trusted me enough to tell me out of all the other guys in our group, since we all confirmed that he had never opened up to any of us beforehand. \n\nI decided that since he trusted me enough to vent to me, that I should show him that I trusted him too and talk/vent to him, since I've had a lot of stuff on my mind anyway. The problem is, I have way too much social anxiety and I'm afraid that I'll mess something up or freak him out before I even get the chance too.\n\nSo reddit, even though its kinda silly, how should I go about venting to my friend?", "summary": "Want to talk and vent to friend to show I trust him, but afraid I'll screw it up before I get the chance. "}
{"id": "t3_1g69gy", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Stories about introducing cats, please.", "post": "I have a neutered, 11-year-old cat, named [Midnight] ( He spent 9 years as a barn cat and was the boss of every cat he ever came into contact with (un-neutered males included). He drove off a few un-neutered males that tried to challenge him. He got along with the other cats, as long as he was allowed to be boss. He's been a happy, indoor, single cat for the better part of two years now. \n\nMy boyfriend has two spayed 15-month-old cats, [Giggles] ( and [Jaclyn] ( Giggles (super friendly) and Jaclyn (skittish) were adopted together, even though they were not litter-mates. They're [friends] ( but they mostly do their own things. \n\nAll three cats will be living together starting in July. They will be meeting in a new apartment - a completely neutral space for all three of them. I know the steps to take when introducing them to each other. Reddit: I'm looking for stories/experiences from other people that have done something similar to this. What did you learn that you wish you had known beforehand?", "summary": "introducing old, neutred male and two young, spayed, already friendly females in a neutral environment this summer. Already know the steps. Looking for stories of similar experiences. "}
{"id": "t3_11z6b6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[26/m][27/f] Is it wrong, or unhealthy, to hope for a failed relationship to work out at some point in the future?", "post": "My girlfriend and I broke up about a month ago. Since then, I've come to see the things that were my fault. She did some shit too, but most of the things she did were based on the fact that I was being a shitty boyfriend in some way or another. I don't think that absolves her of her responsibility for her actions, but it does make it a hell of a lot easier for me to forgive her for them. The trouble is, I love her, very much. And I do want to give it another shot. The things that I did wrong were mostly just taking her for granted. She's dating someone else right now, but I think that will end at some point. So I told her all of this, that I love her, want to spend the rest of my life with her, and I see the areas that I fucked up and really do think that I can change them (even saying that as a guy makes me feel like I'm conforming to some cliche, but I do actually mean it). When I told her this, she said that she really liked what I was saying, but our relationship deteriorated so much toward the end that she thinks it would take some time for her to not feel like we were just jumping back into it at the shitty point. I think I agree with her. If we got back into it right now, she would be standoffish and I would be paranoid and suspicious. But is it unhealthy to look at the end of this relationship as just a long break, and that we may be able to give it another shot at some point?", "summary": "Girlfriend and I broke up, but we think it could work out after the petty baggage we had toward the end becomes more distant. Unhealthy way to look at a breakup?"}
{"id": "t3_3bfziy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by squirting on my keyboard.", "post": "I'm going to start off by saying that this actually happened a few weeks ago, but I never thought to post it in here.\n\nI have a friend that lives in another country to me and let's just say that we aren't exactly shy with each other. Now, with that said, we do have Skype sex (if that's what you call it). This guy *knows* how to get me off and how to finish me by telling me to do the right things. \n\nI knew that I could squirt before I met this person, but damn, I never knew how much. To be as blunt as possible, he told me what fingers to use that could get me to squirt more. So there I was, lying on my bed with my laptop in front of me whilst I was at it, and once I began squirting I seriously could not control the direction of it. At the time I didn't care. It was fucking good. \n\nIt was afterwards that I noticed my fuck up. My laptop screen and whole keyboard was literally soaked. It looked like I spilt a cup of water over it. Instantly I knew it was broken. I cleaned it up so fast but keys began typing letters without being clicked and my screen was going crazy. When I did type, the wrong symbols would appear in relation to what keys I pressed. My friend told me to leave it to dry and it might work but found it hilarious overall. Next time I turned it on, a super loud beeping noise came out of my speakers during the start up screen. Still does this every so often as well.\n\nWeek after, I did it again on my phone screen (you would have thought I learnt my lesson) and now my charging port/sometimes my volume is fucked. \n\nI'm still suffering to this day. Currently saving for a new computer because my laptop is a piece of shit and enjoys typing crap all the time.", "summary": "A rather talented friend made me squirt more than usual, resulting in a drenched cumputer that has it's own brain."}
{"id": "t3_nfq2g", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the funniest fumbled insult/exclamation you've heard made by someone else?", "post": "This happened 11 years ago, and I still laugh about it.\n\nI was in the car with my dad, when some douche bag sideswiped him. It was a minor accident, no one got hurt, and nothing was ridiculously damaged, but my dad was PISSED. Mind you, he's a foreigner (he ain't from Amuuurrriiicaaaa, mahn!), and up until that point in my life, I had heard my dad mess up some phrases here and there. He always pronounced things weirdly, forget to inflect, mistook his \"his\" and \"her\"s, etc. But this one took the cake. As soon as the other driver pulled over, my dad got out of the car, and while waving his hands in the air, he screamed as the other guy tried to talk:\n\n\"SHUT YOUR SHIT! SHUT IT! DO YOU NOT HEAR ME? SHUT YOUR ASS! SHUT YOUR ASS OR I WILL FUCK IT!\"", "summary": "dad gets into a car accident, threatens to give a guy an anal ride instead of yelling at him to shutup."}
{"id": "t3_1yxrde", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[FL] Previous landowner wants to sue my old roommate and I for property damage we did not do; how to proceed?", "post": "Making a long story short, the last homeowners we were under bought the house from the previous owners, whom we originally rented the property from. The home was in near-perfect condition from what I could tell, albeit the carpet was stained in some areas prior to us moving in. \n\nNew homeowner (\"Joe\") has been sending us letters about how we have not complied to Florida Statutes (which to my knowledge is untrue), and the most recent letter issued a notice of claim for damages which far exceed the security deposit, almost all of which are complete BS claims.\n\nI suppose at this rate, I'm most concerned about us having left the house before our lease was up. I took pictures of my room, and I know my roommate (\"Jane\") took pictures of her room and bathroom, but I neglected to take pictures of the rest of the house. Is it possible they could've noticed we were gone (they live on the same street) and come into the house to trash it while it was still under our responsibility? And I also have no idea if that's actually the case; I have moved out-of-state as well as Jane. \n\nRegardless, I am unsure of what to do at this point. He quoted a Florida Statute that says I need to object in writing or he can take what he wants from the deposit (which I figured would happen anyway). Jane has started looking for lawyers for advice on what to do first but I am pretty much flat broke. I don't even know if it would be worth it to hire someone since I'm not 100% sure we would win this case...", "summary": "Previous homeowner trying to get a lot of money out of me and old roommate claiming we left the house in disrepair. This is untrue. What do I do, or what can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4zd5uo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] don't know how I feel towards him [20M]", "post": "I [19f] don't have any experiences with relationships, dating, or even just a proper crush. I am friends with one of my classmates [20m] who's pretty outgoing and friendly. He would often times get touchy and  invite me to eat with him during lunch or dinner. If I didn't have an idea on what he's like, I'd probably make some assumptions and get my hopes up. I always try to get my thoughts in control and not jump into conclusions, or take my feelings into some unfamiliar place (I hope you know what I mean).\n\nAnyway, earlier tonight we walked back to our dorms from a org meeting (along with some members) and the street was pretty dark. My friend (20f), who's afraid of the dark, grabbed onto his shirt. He didn't mind, and we did not make an issue out of it because we all know that's just how she is. (She does that to me a lot)\n\nI really did not make an issue out of it, but I feel something. I don't know. I have an idea on what it is but I hope I could get some opinions from you guys because things like this are really unfamiliar to me and I get kinda uncomfortable when I don't at least have a clue on what is going on.", "summary": "keeps my feelings on guard so as not to misunderstand guy's actions. saw my friend cling on to guy's shirt. had a weird feeling. i hope it's not what i think it is."}
{"id": "t3_1wpgzn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my crush [20 F] Did I do something wrong? Attraction killed?", "post": "Long story short, I approached a classmate at college, really cute girl. Because of my initial confidence she agreed to give me her number after 10 mins of talking.\n\nLater that day sent a short follow up text and she seemed really excited and even called me later that night. But after she called I texted kind of forcing her to pick a time to go on a date with me this weekend. I was afraid she was trying to friendzone me so I forced her hand and she agreed amd picked a time on Sunday.\n\nWell today I sent some texts saying I had special plans for Sunday and telling her my roommate was in the hospital. She replied a bit then totally stopped... and sent a very short text 12 hours later. The vibe feels so different. \n\nOur date is Sunday. Do you guys think I showed way too much investment and put pressure on our date Sunday? Will she bail totally.. or just not talk much to me until Sunday to let her attraction recover a bit?\n\nWhat can I do? Will I recover her attraction?", "summary": "My crush/classmate agreed to date, but is taking long time to recent texts. Did I say too much too soon? Is she about to bail on date?"}
{"id": "t3_1n0k20", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Women, what do you make of this situation?", "post": "CONTEXT: College campus.\n\nOk, I'm an introvert. If I see somebody I know walking towards me from 100 yards, I'll wait until they're two yards away to make eye contact and wave. I pretty much avoid eye contact before that so you don't have that awkward situation where you've both seen each other but you're too far to say hi yet. That's just how I work.\n\nThere's this cute girl that I met on one or two occasions (a couple of weeks ago) with some mutual friends just walking through our dorm. \n\nOne of the people I was with regularly says hi to her when passing, and he has only had a little more interaction with her than me.\n\nThe following scenario has happened a couple times between the time I met her and today:\n\nWe're walking towards each other on a sidewalk - we see and recognize each other from far away so BAM... I avoid eye contact until she's a couple yards away, and by that time I look up to say hi, but she thinks I'm not going to so she walks past looking the other way.\n\nAgain, that has happened a couple times. It is painfully awkward and I walk away making frustrated faces each time... \n\nToday when this happened the first time, it was the usual averting of eye contact, but then I looked back at her about 30 seconds later and she was looking back at me too.\n\nSo today after that happened once already... I saw her again in the same situation, except it wasn't quite as far. I waved... She gave the look of \"I see him waving, but it's probably not me because he never acknowledges me\". I decided to go in for the kill. I said \"Name of girl... Hey!\", waved again, gave a goofy grin, kind of laughed, and made my turn onto another sidewalk in a different direction, cringing and making faces not knowing if I should've just ignored her again. \n\nFor what it's worth, she was with a friend, said \"hey!\", gave a big grin, chuckled a little bit and waved.\n\nWHAT ON EARTH do you think she was thinking throughout all of this... I am absolutely clueless when it comes to women.", "summary": "I'm a clueless idiot who meets a cute girl once or twice, ignores their existence for weeks, then says hi randomly."}
{"id": "t3_x7y2d", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my mom's getting divorced and I'm worrying about how this will all pan out. Advice?", "post": "Unique Characteristics of This (Future) Divorce:\n - My mom has 1 child under 18. \n - I have one older sibling whom my dad pays education for\n - I have \"special needs.\" (I'm physically disabled with A LOT of health problems). \n - We've got someone paying for an apartment for us for 1 year.\n - My dad has been/is emotionally abusive, particularly torwards my mom\n - He's been to jail 1 or 2 times from physically attacking my mom several years ago\n\nIs there anything I/my mom should know before she starts the divorce process? \n\n- - - How does this whole custody thing work? I don't think my dad would get custody of me because he is so absent all of the time. He's gone at \"work\" all day. Even when he's home he's up in his room, or gone on his motorcycle. He has bought a motorcycle and his own car knowing I need a wheelchair van & my mom's car is a throwaway. He has cheated on her- with someone younger than my oldest sister. :/ I mean, I don't really think the judge would give custody to someone like my dad. He doesn't even know what my specific health problem is called. I guess I'm being paranoid.", "summary": "Does anyone know any recourses for a mother who has a special needs child (I'm 15, and have a degenerative condition), and is getting a divorce in Texas/USA? "}
{"id": "t3_voxmp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "turning down a job after I already accepted", "post": "So. I wasn't looking for a job. I like my job a lot. My boss is great, flexible about scheduling, decent pay, good location, and most importantly, I have a lot of responsibility and I get to run and develop a department. My boss clearly trusts me a lot and values my contributions. \n\nI'm not looking, but I was recruited. Big name company, so I am interested to hear more. I pursue the lead, they offer me the job at the interview. \n\nI'm iffy, not ready to leave my comfy nest. But the money they hold out is enticing, plus an offer of a bonus at the end of the year. Also, much nicer offices, big private company, interesting projects, fancy tech I don't have access to at current job. I agonize, finally say yes. \n\nToday I go in to talk to my boss and quit and he was awesome. He was like, you can leave, but we really like you, we're going to bump you up to at least that same salary next month (were planning to anyway) and we want to grow your roll here. I really appreciated his time, and he was really honest and helpful. \n\nSo now I'm like, oh, no, I want to stay here! For the same money, more responsibility and it's a way more flexible schedule and as I'm thinking of having kids soon, that's a big deal.  But I already accepted the other offer (via email, didn't sign the offer letter). \n\nIs there a way to gracefully back out? The job starts in like a month, they have plenty of time to find someone else. I just want to do it as classily as possible, now that I screwed up. And how bad would this make me look?", "summary": "Accepted a job offer, my current countered with a raise of equal value, I like it here anyway, now I want to stay. So how do I back out from what I accepted? And how bad is it?"}
{"id": "t3_2o5x5n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my Gf [24 F] 1 year, high maintenance and now have to be long distance.", "post": "I got together with my gf about a year ago after being very close for years. It all started because I got tired of trying to be in a serious relationship with her and just wanted out, she did hurt me a lot and close friends intervened to talk me into just moving on. I even began seeing someone. I probably didn't talk to her in a month. One day she literally grabbed me and took me to a more private place so she could tell me she really wanted to be with me and that this time apart had allowed her to realize how wrong she was and how much she had hurt me. I decided to give her a chance. \n\nProblems arose when she found out I had gone out with another girl and gone to places she considered 'ours'. She demanded that I completely stop talking to her, delete her from fb and things like that. \n\nSix months later I moved to another city about 250 miles away. I work during the day so I don't really talk to her a lot during the day. In the afternoon we used to skype and talk. I started to get into gaming and she complained that I would not stop playing to talk to her (you can't pause online games). Eventually our conversations turned into fights because she felt I did not do anything for her. For months I visited about every 1-3 weeks (during the weekends, 4+ hour bus ride each way). This was a pretty big expense for me to maintain. \n\nI am not someone who can maintain long conversations, I'm very pragmatic. I'll say what I need to say without taking detours. At some point she'd cry every time I talked to her because she claimed I did not care for her when I did. After 5 or 6 months of this she said she wants to break up and I will be going back there soon to attend a party in which she will be present. What can I do? She won't move with me.", "summary": "GF wants to break up because she says I don't care about her. She's everything to me but I don't know how to show her I care."}
{"id": "t3_17nvxc", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "She seemed so interested and couldn't seem to stop texting me.  Now, the night we're supposed to hang out, she's suddenly MIA.  What's going on?", "post": "I (25) met a girl (22) at a party.\n\nBasically, we hit it off.  Starting texting constantly and found out how similar we are.  We tried to meet up last weekend, but she got sick (actually got sick) and she seemed super bummed about having to skip.\n\nShe says things to me like \"I can't believe you exist\", \"I feel like I've known you a long time\", \"this is so exciting and scary at the same time\", so I thought she liked me.\n\nToday, I ask her to meet up tonight and she seems excited and she'll keep me posted.  I wait hours and hours, and text her \"are you up for tonight?\" with no response.  I see she is liking photos on Facebook, so I know she saw it.\n\nWhat the hell?  I'm actually angry right now.  She would text me like, every day and if I ended a conversation she would text me again several hours later.  I really like her, and I thought she really liked me.  At 25, I'm able to tell when a girl is just being polite or if she actually likes you.\n\nShould I call her?  Just move on without asking what happened?  Should I lay it out (say \"hey, that kind of hurt when you ignored the text to hang out, because you've really been giving me a different impression\")?", "summary": "Girl really seems to genuinely like me and says she can't wait to meet up.  Comes the night of, and she isn't responding to texts."}
{"id": "t3_51f6nq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my GF [22 F] of 2 years. She's been sick for almost a year and I'm exhausted.", "post": "She's been sick almost a year (of something the doctors haven't spotted yet) and she lives alone (family's not around). I've been taking care of her for most of my time (I work mon through fri, office) and I'm worried 24/7 about her condition and there's nothing I can do. I'm exhausted cause of it.  \n\nHonestly I don't know if I'm attracted to her anymore. I love her, but we haven't been intimate for a while and that's a problem for me I feel like a dick for that.\n\nHaven't cheated or anything, and we're not married but still it makes feel like garbage feeling sex it's so important that might destroy what we have. \n\nI tried my best helping even buying stuff for her everyday cause she can't get out of the house. Stopped going to the gym and hanging out with my friends cause she needed someone by her side.\n\nBut I'm losing strengths and I don't know how to talk to her about this; this situation also put her on a deep depression and every comment I make blames it on herself. Anyone on a similar situation that may spare an advice?\n  \nEnglish is not my first language, sry for the possible mistakes.", "summary": "She's been sick for a year, we still don't know what disease is, been taking care of her, i'm exhausted and don't know if I'm attracted to her anymore. Don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_aop1o", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit - what do you do when somebody spells your name incorrectly on a repeated basis?", "post": "I work in an HR-based function doing a combination of recruiting, talent management (reads: helping people get promotions and career plan), and conduct training and development activities.  Several months ago I met a guy who was looking for a job here, but none were available at the time.  Being that he has some good qualifications I gave him my business card and told him to check in periodically and I would keep him in mind.\n\nHe emails me once or twice per month which I have no problem with, but he has spelled my name incorrectly 100% of the time!  The thing that kills me is that not only is my name clearly printed on my business card, but my company sets email addresses up in the format of firstname.lastname@companyname.com.  As such he had to at least initially input my name correctly into his address book.\n\nI don't want to be a jerk, but I am a little frustrated that this guy misspells my name so frequently.  My name is in my signature line of every email, so each time I reply he can see the proper spelling, so what else can or should I do?", "summary": "guy spells my name wrong every time he emails me and it is getting annoying enough to want to do something about it without being a jerk."}
{"id": "t3_1syugz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [32M] want to make it work with sister's best friend[28F] after electric hookup and who emailed me months after no contact.", "post": "Long story short: I finally hooked up with my sister's best friend at her wedding. It was electric. We met several times after that but its a lengthy drive. Talked on the phone several nights a week for hours on end. Sent texts bla bla bla. I've known her several years but romantically only a matter of months.\n\nShe then cut it off because she was afraid of long distance. I cut contact with her even though she wanted to remain in contact and \"be friends.\" 3 months later, she emails me and says she still thinks about me and wants to make it good between us. When I try to get clarification, her responses are short, misdirecting, and vague.\n\nI don't think she's coming from a bad place but I can't tell if she just likes the attention or if she doesn't know what she wants. Any help on what I should do would be so helpful.", "summary": "After electric hookup and several subsequent meetings, sister's best friend cuts it off with me, emails me several months later saying she \"still think about me.\" Her replies are vague and misdirecting."}
{"id": "t3_3c4qsa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [17F] tell a potential boyfriend [17M] that our relationship has a time limit?", "post": "For some quick background, I began hanging out with a guy (also 17) a few months ago, and our friendship has developed to a point where I've become interested in him as more than a friend. I've heard from other people at school that this guy likes me, and he's hinted a few times about asking me out soon, so I'm pretty sure he's going to do it soon.\n\nHowever, we're both about to be seniors in high school, and while I would be totally alright with having a boyfriend this year, I've already decided that I want to go into college next year being single. I don't want to deal with a long distance relationship and I don't want to miss out on meeting new people because I'm still committed to some high school relationship that probably wouldn't last anyway. Thus, I've already decided that next summer I'm going to break up with anyone I end up dating this year. The guy I like, on the other hand, has talked to me before about how he wants a serious girlfriend he can be in a committed relationship with.\n\nBasically, my question is whether or not I should tell him upfront that I'm going to break up with him next year, or just let the relationship happen and break up when the time comes? I feel like he should kind of subconsciously know that most high school relationships don't last through college, but I'm not sure if he's one of those hopeless romantics that believes his first girlfriend is going to be the person he's with forever (I don't know if it's relevant, but he's never had a girlfriend before; I've had one boyfriend). I just don't want to start dating him with him thinking we're going to date for a really long time, and then being blindsided when I break up with him next year.\n\nSorry if this is a stupid question about petty high school drama, but I wanted some outside opinions from other people.", "summary": "A guy I like is about to ask me out, but I'm not sure if I should tell him now that if we date, I'm for sure going to break up with him next summer (because of college)."}
{"id": "t3_14n81x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M22/F21] As a favor I am \"dating\" my Best Friend, now I am really falling for her.", "post": "I [M22] have known my best friend [F21] since freshman year of high school so about **Eight years**. We quickly became best friends and have been since. I had feelings for her before but never acted on them because she was in relationships and eventually they faded. But recently she asked me to be her fake boyfriend, because she is an attractive female in a field with a lot of horny men so it helps keep the sexual comments and harassment down if she has a \"boyfriend\". \nProblem is, now that we have been \"dating\" the feelings have come back and I have started to fall for her. I know this isn't infatuation because there are aspects of her personality that I find annoying and others that I love.\n Since we have started \"dating\" She is very flirty with me which makes me think that she might feel the same way about me,  but she can sometimes be that way with other people too. She also jokes about us being in a relationship. In other words, it has become very confusing to me. \nSo, what I am asking should I pursue it and possibly ruin a great friendship that I value dearly or go for it and stop asking myself what if?", "summary": "[M22] I have fallen for my best friend [F21] when she asked me to be her fake boyfriend."}
{"id": "t3_2h23p2", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Not sure if this is technically a legal question, but question regarding college transfer", "post": "So, super long story short(If needed for more information, I will give some), I currently attend a decent college (I'm not sure if it's the best idea to post my college for privacy sake, but lets say it is ranked in the top 30 colleges by US News), and have a good resume/portfolio. The college I'm attending really fucked up with me, and they realized it. Before this semester my GPA was 3.8 and I had countless extracurricular. A student made some false accusations against me(not rape, actually even worse accusations), and the school punished me before hearing my side or collecting evidence. I just proved my innocence in court the other day, and all records have been expunged and the school was forced to remove disciplinary sanctions against me, but there are permanent damages that have been done. I was approached by a group of lawyers because my case would help make a multimillion dollar class action suit against the school virtually guaranteed, and this was made known to the school. The vice chancellor of my school, as well as many other higher-ups in the administration approached me and said they would bend over backwards to help me in any way they could. I want to transfer at this point because of everything that's happened here, and want them to help me in the process. Does anyone know if this is a possibility? Could the administration here ask another school to accept me as a transfer, or is there no way around waiting till new applications come around and applying for a different school next year? Also, what would you guys recommend I do as far as proceeding with the school. Should I just try catching back up on everything and acting like this never happened, or should I engage the school to have them right the wrongs they did? I don't want them to end up retaliating against me if I decided to go about this aggressively.", "summary": "My school(very well known, and pretty well ranked) screwed up and owes me big time. Could they ask a favor of another school to get me transferred out, or is that not in their realm of power?"}
{"id": "t3_2f1kof", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20M] with girl I like [20F] I don't want my shyness to ruin another relationship...", "post": "Back ground info: So I went out with this girl a couple times, then invited her to go to the markets because she loves the markets. I really like this girl, she is cute has a really nice smile and we get a long really we'll. she says good morning and good night to me and while texting I'm fine but once we meet I turn into an awkward bowl of god knows what and find it hard to say anything or even think of something to say... It's been like this my hole life and most of my relationships don't last more then 2 - 3 dates and I'm sick of it.\nSo She messages me today and said \"I feel you feel really awkward around me and you don't know what to say :) but honestly I don't care, even when we are just sitting next to each other saying nothing I just love your company\" I said thank you and that it made me feel better her telling me. She then said \"I really wanna keep spending time with you so you feel comfortable and it isn't awkward for you\". Now I understand we have only been on 3 dates but I got an email saying \"her name\" has updated there dating profile and she uploaded a picture she took today and has been online all night, so I have either completely fucked up and now friend zoned like every other girl I talk to or I might have one more chance. She sent me a message at 12:30am saying \"I would really like to see you again\" followed by \"I was just thinking about you and I feel so bad for messing things up\".\n\nShe said she was having launch today I feel I should have jumped at that and said do you want to get it with me, but I sent her a message and asked her to do something next Sunday as its my only day of next week.\n\n so that's where I need reddits help, I know she is looking at other guys now but I feel I might have a chance to grow some and show her that I like her, but im so shy and awkward I don't know how I honestly just got blank and can't think of anything.", "summary": "dating a girl I'm super awkward and shy and need help over coming it, don't want to loose another relationship because I'm stupid and shy. Thanks guys, I honestly feel sick because I really liked her..."}
{"id": "t3_1x5z96", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29/F] & my boyfriend [29/M]", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 9 years.\n\nLast week, I gave my boyfriend my computer to repair. He gave it back to me. I was moving files from one computer to another by emailing files and then downloading them on the repaired computer, when I see that pdfs were downloaded yesterday. I didn't have my computer yesterday, my boyfriend did.\n\nHe apparently downloaded credit card statements. He accessed my accounts without my permission. He didn't take any money, just downloaded statements.\n\nHe was able to access my accounts by going through files/folders that have my user name and passwords saved. I have since password protected my documents so this can't happen ever again.\n\nHe denies he did anything. I gave him a chance to explain himself and to confess, but he said he didn't download anything. Now, I used Google Chrome and my gmail account has his IP address logged, showing he signed into my account yesterday. It was absolutely him.\n\nI'm pretty sure the relationship is over, but what would you do in this situation?", "summary": "boyfriend violated my trust by logging into my credit card accounts and email, and downloading credit card statements. When confronted, he denied he did anything."}
{"id": "t3_3gpc3i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my boyfriend [23M] of 5 months, I got a part time job and now I'm worried what will happen to our relationship?", "post": "So I'm in my 2nd year of college beginning September and two days ago I finally landed a job. It's nothing in the field I want to do, just something to earn a bit of money, its a waitressing job.\n\nFor the entire summer all I wanted was a job, to not have to rely on parents, and to be able to buy or do whatever I want. My boyfriend works in a clothes shop but currently isn't really working cause he has a repeat college exam and is busy studying for that.\n\nWe don't live together and lately because of the exam we haven't seen each other in almost 2 weeks. I guess I'm worried that now that I have a job, we won't get to see each other as much, and worried that after his exam, he'll be off out on nights out with his friends and I won't be able cause I work from around 5.00pm till 1-2am.\n\nI know this sounds ridiculous but I know I'm going to feel left out. I don't know why I'm feeling like this because it's irrational and all I wanted for months was a job. Maybe because his hours are always morning/evening and mine are evening/night so I wonder when we will get to see each other.\n\nRight now, I feel like quitting because it doesn't seem worth it. Am I being crazy?", "summary": "Finally got a job, but now worried how my relationship with boyfriend will be as working opposite hours. Feel like quitting."}
{"id": "t3_1pcsua", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27M] not sure when to start looking or dating after 8 year relationship and 12 years of consecutive relationships.", "post": "I won't get too far into the details, but basically had an 8 year long relationship end in April of this year. We split friendly enough, but she ended up being angry and there was fallout in our social circle as a result. We started talking again in late June, and called it quits for good in August partly because of the burnt bridges.\n\nI want to start dating again, but I'm not really sure that I should. I lost almost all of my (our) \"friends\" as a result of her attitude about our break up (lying, exaggerating to gain support, etc). It does make me angry, but she needs the emotional support more than I do. That being said... I am lonely now. I pretty much have 2 friends, and they're both busy with their own lives. I don't want to make the mistake of seeking a relationship just because I am feeling lonely.\nI also have feelings of regret and I miss our relationship sometimes, but I mostly feel bad for my ex because of the situation she has put herself in (I know we both made mistakes). It almost feels hormonal or something because I will randomly break down emotionally for no reason. We had 4 dogs and it feels like I lost my kids too (got them as puppies over the years). I don't know what I should be doing to properly move on, and I would feel wrong entering into a relationship like this. I work full time, I have been hitting the gym regularly for 3 years, I get out as much as I can.\nEh I dunno, rereading this is can see what a mess my mind is. What do you guys think? Date in an effort to move on? Hold off in fairness to others?", "summary": "Out of 8 year relationship for a couple of months, not sure when to open myself back up to dating - don't want to hurt anybody."}
{"id": "t3_x8epd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My fish is eating my other fish! wtf is going on?!", "post": "Okay so I've had two goldfish and a spotted pelco in an aquarium for going on three years now. No problems before, but about two weeks ago, one of the goldfish died. No biggie right? Wrong. I wake up to the spotted pelco fucking sucking on the dead fish, floating along the top of the tank. I flush the dead fish, the first time I've had to in years, and move on. I can only assume it was trying to eat this fish. I assume it was just acting on instinct, being a scavenger. Now I come home from work today to see the other (recently very healthy and active) goldfish floating ALMOST dead in the tank, with the pelco again sucking on it. The scales have come off, leaving the not-gold-anymore fish an ugly pale skin color. Has my pelco turned carnivorous? WTF is going on?", "summary": "MY SPOTTED PELCO HAS BEGUN CONSUMING MY OTHER FISH AS THEY DIE. WTF IS GOING ON?"}
{"id": "t3_2vkho8", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Question about the timing of a past Backdoor Roth IRA conversion", "post": "First, my apologies if this has been answered before. I couldn't find any reference to this here on Reddit nor on Google.\n\nSo back in 2009 I had just heard about backdoor Roth IRA conversions, which would help me because I had an AGI north of $150k. I opened a new Traditional IRA Account with Vanguard and made 3 non-deductible contributions to it between April 14 2009 and January 2 2010 (covering CY 2008 ($3k), 2009 ($5k) and 2010 ($5k)).\n\nAround January 2010 I did a backdoor conversion from my Vanguard Traditional IRA to a brand new Vanguard Roth IRA. The total was around $13700.\n\nAround May 2010 I rolled around $50k from a 401k I had with a previous employer to my Vanguard Traditional IRA.\n\nWhen I did my taxes for 2010, my accountant said I would be subject to the pro-rating since I had \"mixed\" pre-tax and post-tax money in my Traditional IRA. Even though the balance of my Vanguard Traditional IRA was 0 between January and May of 2010, he said because the account had contained both pre-tax and post-tax money in the same calendar year, the IRS considers the money \"mixed\". I took his word for it at the time, but after reading tons of articles on backdoor Roth IRAs, I've started to wonder if he was correct.\n\nDoes anyone have any information on if this is true or not? I tried reading the instructions for form 8606 and it makes my head hurt. Any clarification or links to where the IRS addresses this would be most helpful.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "Was my past Roth IRA Conversion subject to taxes if I rolled a 401k to a Traditional IRA AFTER I had performed the Roth IRA Conversion earlier in the year?"}
{"id": "t3_3kkn82", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (m23) need advice about a fantastic girl (f23) I've started seeing", "post": "(m23) have just met /started seeing a (f23) friend of a friend. we seemed to hit it off almost immediately and we both seemed ecstatic to see each over the next days. Now, a week or two later, things have cooled down a bit (and this might be in my head) but she seems to be nearing the end of her infatuation with me and I still feel this huge urge to impress this girl/ to help her / do bf things. I want to show her that I care and would very much like to date without seeming.... crazy. I've asked her once and she said to find out more about each other but is still keen on the idea. we've already had sex and she's spent the night so this isn't bodily desire, she makes me want to jump up and work and provide. I've never felt this way so strongly so I'm kinda freaking out. how do I stand out and show her how I feel? should I? is this normal or am I just thinking of this/her too much and need to pump my brakes?", "summary": "we're all good at first, now I'm wanting to be the best bf I can be and continue our relationship. however, I'm not so sure about her though."}
{"id": "t3_256qet", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [M17] I saw my GF's Sister (24) full making out with a man Not her fiancee at my work. I'm confused what to do?", "post": "I work at a coffee shop and I saw my girlfriend's sister full on making out with this guy.  They were all over each other.  We were really busy and I never would have noticed them except that my co-workers pointed them out cause they were all \"they need a room, this is a coffee shop.\"   I immediately recognized her and she's supposed to get married in July to another guy.\n\nThey could not see me.  I didn't want to get involved.  But after they left I came out to clean some tables thinking the coast was clear.  She came back in for something.  I think to use the restroom, or she forgot something.  She saw me and flipped and started begging me to tell her what I saw.  I said I didn't see anything but she somehow knew.\n\nShe left but told me that we weren't \"done\" and that we had to talk.  I just got home and my girlfriend texted me asking me what's going on with me and her sister.  I don't know what she told her but I said I don't know.  She keeps texting me that her sister is upset and that I should come over.  Not to sound like a little kid but I'm not allowed to leave the house at this time.  I texted her that my parents won't let me go there.  She said they will drive to my house if I sneak out to meet them.  I said that would be hard.  She said Please!\n\nWhat can I do?  What should I do?  I'm a little freaked out right now.", "summary": "I saw my GF's sister cheating on her fiancee.  Now my girlfriend and her sister want to meet me.  Not sure how to handle this."}
{"id": "t3_2dkrm0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I help my grandma from 1,000 miles away? Or do I move back home?", "post": "My grandma [64] revealed to me [24] last night that my mother [42] has been addicted to pills for some months. This all came about because my mother intentionally hurt herself, more seriously than she probably knew or wanted to, last night in order to get more pills.\n\nThis isn't about my mother. For the past 6 years she's lived with my grandparents because she can no longer take care of herself, though in the past year she had been stable, helpful, and even a little happy. This is about my grandma. Up until a few months ago, she had the help of my grandpa [64] in taking care of my mother and two siblings ([11] and [7]), but he suddenly passed away last March. Now she's left alone, and is completely overwhelmed. Everyone in her life right now is too busy caring for other sick relatives (yes, I'm serious. It's almost comical.) Then there's me.\n\nI live a thousand miles away, having left for a better life and better opportunities. But now I feel like I have to help my grandma, and the only way to do that is to abandon my life here and move back. If I were to do that, though, it would betray everything I've ever worked for (my impending marriage, my career, my thriving hobby), and my grandpa's legacy. (He always wanted me to make more of myself, having come from a clearly not-so-great background.) I don't know what to do. Should I leave to help care for the house and kids? Is there someone I can contact to get them help? Any and all suggestions/words of advice are welcome.", "summary": "Grandma's alone in raising my siblings and addict mother. No clue how I can help, except move back home and abandon my life."}
{"id": "t3_3dja64", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[Georgia] Additional charge appears on Acknowledgement of Court Date document after case rescheduling", "post": "My girlfriend committed simple battery this Spring after punching another woman at a bar in here in Georgia.\n\nA few days after the incident, she was contacted by a police officer who informed her she had a warrant for her arrest. She turned herself in and spent 24 hours in jail before her initial hearing inside of the jail where she was informed of the charge against her. She was released and went home to await her court date.\n\nFlash forward to last month. She went to court on her scheduled date but was informed that her case was not ready and would be postponed for another three months. She was directed to the solicitor's office, where she was given an Acknowledgement of Court Date document (not sure if that's the actual title, but it included information about the arraignment rescheduling on it). That document, in addition to listing the revised date and time, also lists the charges she's facing. When she looked at the paper, she noticed a new charge had been included alongside the simple battery, masturbation for hire.\n\nNo where, not on the officer's report of the incident, nor the county court case website system, is there any mention of this charge, only on this scheduling document. She contacted her arresting officer, who said he did not arrest her for or charge her for it.\n\nThis document was hand written by someone in the solicitor's office, not printed from a computer, which leads me to believe it's a simple clerical error.\n\nMy question is how can we be certain that this charge was not erroneously added and will be brought up at her arraignment? If it is a clerical error as I suspect, is there anything we can do to petition the county to remove it or to ensure that the charge doesn't actually exist somewhere official?\n\nAny advice would be most appreciated.", "summary": "Girlfriend punched a girl, gets arrested, and when she goes to her arraignment finds an extra masturbation for hire charge on the acknowledgement of court date paper. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_3xdc07", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] in relationship with my gf [20F] since 1.5 yrs,gf's family is very stubborn to marry her in same caste", "post": "From the past 1 and half years we hav been in a relation, with many difficulties i jst made her mind to b in relation wid me.She kept requesting me that her family wont allow all this,though she loved me too,she fell in love couldnt resist herself.We are very happy together and no issues,just one-FUTURE.\n\nThough one and half year has passed,whenever we talk abt our future,it leaves both of us in a doubt.I dont know how to console her.So evertytime we just hav to change the topic and move on with the joy of being together and we just hav decided to b wid each other as long as we can,as we cant change the mentality of our families.I jst dnt knw wat i wil do without her.Sometimes i feel we would hav been better friends than this love and all,and she was right in the beginning not to b in relation.What should i do?\n\nshe says she knws her family well,they wont agree for the marriage as they look for money,land and all!M I just unlucky to get birth in lower cast?(though my fanancial conditions are gud,but my family dsnt own any land )\nMy self concious doesnt allow me to go against our families and live separate.I dnt want a girl to loose her family,her respect,this happens all around and i m jst fed up from all this,the beliefs,the customs i just dont want her to b harmed in any way and love for her family destroyed and can even sacrifice my love for it.\nstill there are 3-4 years till marriage comes up(i think so).cant say abt her parents,if we tell them soon ,they will marry here smwhere else wdout a second thought.I cant figure out smthng nd cant do anyhting in my life cause of it,i hav still to achieve smthing and become smthing but if all this goes on i cant give her a life she wants nd i cant get mine.", "summary": "Should i try to be her freind again and forget our love and try to leave her slowly or should i stand wid her confront her family,and start a separate life away from everyone?"}
{"id": "t3_30tsjt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Reddit, please help--I (23/F) can't stop touching my (25/M) SO", "post": "Please reddit, I need some advice. My SO and I have been together for about 4 years, long distance for the last 1. \n\nBottom line is I am a very physically affectionate, he is not. This has been an ongoing issue every since the honeymoon phase ended. In the beginning, he was just as affectionate as I was but that gradually that faded, and he started to become uncomfortable if I was touching him (holding his hand, giving him a hug, trying to cuddle, pretty much anything). He doesn't mind affection if he initiates, but can't stand it if I do.\n\nHe's told me this again and again. And I try, but it's just something so natural to me that I don't even think twice about it. Then he gets upset that I can't respect his personal space, I get upset that I am unable to do this one thing for him, and the cycle starts over again.\n\nAnyway, I know this is a big issue between us, and I would like to figure out a way to solve it. Any suggestions on what to try would be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "I am very physically affectionate, SO is not and feels like I can't respect his person boundaries. How can we fix it?"}
{"id": "t3_2r2zj2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Cheating Ex [21 F] won't stop hanging out with my [21 M] circle of friends, and they're part of the problem.", "post": "[Personal Issues] So I dated this girl for just shy of two years, then broke up with her after she admitted to cheating on me with a couple from her work, claiming we were supposed to have a foursome but she conveniently forgot to tell me about it.\n\nAnyway fast forward to now (about a year later) and I have a childhood friend (let's call him Joe) who keeps inviting her to all of our group gatherings. \n\nI understand that during the time we were together she got along with my friends and formed new acquaintances, but most of my good friends stopped talking to her after the breakup, and for a time things were fine. Now out of nowhere she's everywhere I go out with my friends and I feel like a shitty person because she gets along with everybody so well but I kinda wish she'd just fuck off because of what she did to me. \n\nTo complicate things, she introduced Joe to his girlfriend, and although the two ladies aren't nearly as close as Joe and I are, I'd feel like a controlling douche if I flat out asked him not to invite her to our future get-togethers. \n\nSo I guess my question is should I try to intervene and probably come across as a neurotic, bitter control freak who's not over his ex (probably true) or should I just cut my loses and stop hanging around that group so much? I do have other friends, but this circle is my childhood/school friends.\n\nJust kinda feels like a lose-lose...", "summary": "Can't get ex out of my life, don't want to be controlling but also genuinely unhappy at outings we both frequent."}
{"id": "t3_1ca1n1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Stuck [m 21] in relationship with baby's momma [F 18]", "post": "So we're dealing with a teen mom/young parents-who-can't-support-a- child situation here.\n\n**Back story**\n\n>Girlfriend of 2 years (on and off) accidently gets pregnant Spring 2012\n\n>Already shitty relationship fueled mostly by desperation and immaturity\n\n>She wants to keep it, I don't\n\n**Current**\n\nFast forward to this past November and my first son is born.  My girlfriend moved in with him so aside from work, we spent pretty much every waking minute together.  Like I said, this relationship is already toxic, we're always fighting, we live(d) in my parents' house, we resent each others' pasts, etc.  It's horrible environment for two young adults, let alone our child.\n\nThe thing is, I love my son.  I look at him and see my entire world.  I love spending time with him and look forward to watching him grow (he's almost 4 months).  He's the only thing keeping his mother in my life.  I'm afraid to break up with her completely because I fear she'll use him to get back at me by not letting me see him, lie to the courts to get custody, etc.  I don't want her to be the kind of mother that talks shit about her kid's father and screw up his relationship with his parents.  I just want things to be civil.  Oh and I kicked her out of my house yesterday, saying it was only temporary.  She took our son with her to her parents' house.\n\nI feel like there's so much more to say, but I can't get my thoughts organized.  Feel free to ask anything.", "summary": "I'm in a toxic relationship with my girlfriend and we have a child.  I don't know how to be there for my son if his mother would be a spiteful ex."}
{"id": "t3_4yzk2p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [30M] of 5.5 years left me [26F] two weeks ago and I think it was all my fault. How do you cope?", "post": "Very long story short, we broke up once three years ago for 8 months then rekindled. I knew in my heart that getting back together was going to end badly and it did. I was too stubborn and selfish to admit it wasn't going to work so I'd cry and beg whenever he tried to leave me (which was often) and he'd end up staying. We lived together for the last 2 years.. we had countless fights that would spiral out of control, especially if I was buzzed. I'd drink and make everything worse and he hated it and wanted me to quit and I'd promise to.. then wouldn't. I treated him really poorly and was putting him down a lot and knit picking every single thing about him. It was a truly toxic situation and now it's over. \n\nSo now... how do I move on? With the knowledge of knowing you acted like a monster.. how does one actually move on? I hate myself for screwing it up. I loved him genuinely.. but maybe not that much if I treated him poorly?", "summary": "I screwed up my longest relationship and I don't know how to cope with the realization that he's better off without me."}
{"id": "t3_3fqpp2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22 M] girlfriend [21 F] of 1 year keeps saying that she does not deserve me and that I should find someone better but I want to reassure her that I am going nowhere.", "post": "My girlfriend is bipolar and is very low at the moment. Through throwaways and the internet, I am slowly learning to deal with her low moods. \n\nEvery time is she feeling like this I do my best to make sure she is knows that I love her and I am there for her for everything she needs or wants. I m going to lie it sometimes can be frustrating and unrewarding but I really do not care, I love everything about her and being with my best friend is a dream come through.\n\nRecently, she keeps saying that she does not deserve me and that I should find someone better. I really want to reassure her that I am going nowhere, but I do not know how would be the best way to say this. \n\nI am desperate to find advice from anyone who may have been in a similar situation and would know how and what to say to her.", "summary": "Bipolar girlfriend keeps saying that she does not deserve me and that I should find someone better. I want to reassure her that I am going nowhere but I do not know how would be the best way to go about it."}
{"id": "t3_54rfc5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19M] need advice on relationship with [18F].", "post": "About 3 weeks ago I matched with this girl on Tinder who I knew from back home (we're at college). I started talking to her, flirting with her, but then shortly realized that she had a boyfriend back home who I don't know. She's a freshman in college, he's a senior in high school and the distance between them is over 3 hours. I know its kinda fucked up, but all my buddies said it wasn't for me to worry about and that I should continue talking to this girl. We've gone out a few times to eat, we've gone out to the bars, and we even hooked up the other night. \n\nLast night, we were laying in my bed having the typical pillow talk that a \"couple\" has and she informed me that she told her boyfriend they needed a break. I actually really like this girl. She's super easy to talk to, she's funny, she's gorgeous, she's just fun to be around. \n\nThe problem is, I kinda have some trust issues because I was cheated on in a previous relationship and, unfortunately, I see the red flags that she has. She was on tinder, flirting, talking, and going out with me even though she had a boyfriend back home.\n\nAm I an idiot for wanting to advance with this girl? IF I do get in a relationship with her, how do I know she won't just do the same thing to me? Please help..", "summary": "Girl I'm talking to cheated on her ex with me. I'm not sure if its a good idea to pursue a relationship with her because of this. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_bkxth", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "in a long-distance-relationship, accidently fell in love with another girl", "post": "so here is where I am at, I have an amazing girlfriend who I have dated for just over a year. I think she's perfect but our circumstances are not; she works at a real job on the other side of the country while I'm going to be in (grad) school for the six years\n\nI really like her, but honestly I realize that I won't be able to have a real relationship with her any time soon. Meanwhile we're perfect together, our families love each other and in most people's eyes we're already destined to be married\n\nwhile at school I've met another girl who totally has blown me away, she's nothing like the girl I am dating now but I love to hang out with her just as friends and I love the things that she brings out in me. one night when we got both really drunk we both confessed that we have mutual feelings for each other (no I would never cheat on my gf). We're still cool, and we're still really good friends, but at this point I need to make a some sort of final conclusion so I don't lead either of them on\n\nso I honestly have no idea what to do, if I were to be honest I would probably rather be dating my current gf but in reality circumstances are just so excruciating I don't know if I can keep it up\n\nmeanwhile I have this amazing girl who actually likes me, and who I could actually be in a real relationship\n\nis it worth it to try to wait/work this one out or would I be missing a chance with somebody who would be making me so happy", "summary": "> I have an amazing girlfriend but it's going at least six years until we can have a real relationship b/c of distance, meanwhile I've found a equally amazing girl that I can be with now..."}
{"id": "t3_19ak1y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (29/f) am so sick of being jealous/obsessing over my bf's (32/m) ex-wife.", "post": "Please, help me get out of my head.  I am tired of this irrational thinking.\n\nBoyfriend of 1 year has an ex-wife (divorced about 2 years now), with whom he shares a 2 year old son.  They officially broke up during the pregnancy and have since had a pretty functional and cool co-parenting relationship. \n\nAnd then here I am.  Happy with boyfriend.  He sees his son about twice a week, on days when I'm not around.  I haven't met him yet, mostly just because of schedule conflicts and we wanted to wait a while.  Looking forward to it, eventually.\n\nBut my god.  I CANNOT stop thinking about how he shared a home with this woman.  I feel jealous that they have a child together -- it's such an intimate and special thing to share!  I even got drunk one night and found one of her old abandoned photobucket accounts which included pictures of them when they used to be together.\n\nI've asked him about their relationship, he said he wasn't happy for a long time.  He rushed into the marriage, unsure.  And when things were on the outs, they found out she was pregnant.  They divorced and are trying to raise this kid as best they can.\n\nSo why the fuck do I care???  Seriously.  I am so sick of this.  EVERYONE has a past.  I have had a serious live-in relationship of my own.  Inside I am so mad that he wasn't more cautious about having a kid with someone he knew he wouldn't be with.  I'll never be his first wife, I'll never give birth to his first child.", "summary": "I'm always feeling jealous/obsessed with the ex-wife.  Can't stop thinking about her.  Really wish I could just let it go."}
{"id": "t3_3dug1x", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Advices/hugs needed", "post": "me[19/m] and my gf [17/F] have been together for 3 years and more. We met at secondary school and the first and a half year of relationship was sweet and lovely. After that I graduated from secondary school and proceeded to college. Since then my schedule is somehow different from hers, thus we cannot meet each other that often even though we are still in the same, small city. I am a bit aware of my family's financial status so I dont feel like visiting her a lot. We do miss each other and our relationship keep getting worse. This situation lasted for around 1.5 years and recently we had a deep chat and she told me that she was very very tired of this kind of medium-distance relationship and she didn't know whether she still love me or not. I still love her, I still miss her, I admit I was being selfish and not be with her, it felt like the whole situation is caused by me. I'm hoping to continue, but logically it would be best to break up, for the sake of both of us. Redditors, thanks for reading, if you don't have anything to comment, kindly leave a reply when you read it, 'I've read this' will do, I need some support, thank you :)", "summary": "couple in the same city but different schedule, can't meet up that often, relationship got worse, she didn't know whether she love me or not, frustrated"}
{"id": "t3_3twncc", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU on OkCupid", "post": "This happened literally, not figuratively, 15 minutes ago.\n\nI'm chatting to this guy on OkCupid for the past couple of weeks! He's handsome, smart, uses proper grammar, and is witty. We talked the first round of OkCupid but I logged off when I started dating a now ex-boyfriend.\n\nHe gives me his number, so of course I text him. No reply. Two days pass. No reply. Now I'm getting pissed. What the frick is wrong with this man?! I go on OkCupid and basically write \"Deuces\" to him. \n\nHe gives me his number again...AND I FUCKING ADDED AN EXTRA NUMBER. I NEVER TEXTED HIM AND SENT A FREAK OUT TEXT OVER NOTHING.\n\nShit, shit. Time to play damage control. But it's too late.\n\nHe's pissed, insults my race, says I'm crazy. Wishes me luck. Lesson learned.", "summary": "I'm a dyslexic crazy Asian who jumped the gun and lost out on a hot guy on OkCupid."}
{"id": "t3_23aubq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20/M] There are so many signs that tells she [20/f] is cheating, but I still try to believe her", "post": "Last week I get a call from my father saying that my gf had posted that she was in a relationship with her ex on her fb. When I went to go check her fb was deleted so I call her and asked what was the post was all about and she told me that her friend (ironically specking) who had been hanging with her and her good friends had took her phone and did that when she was trying to delete her fb from her phone and asked one of them to do it.\n\n Later on in the week I found out that she had actually blocked me and my dad from fb and that there were pictures of them hanging out too. That day I confronted her about it and she told me it was nothing and that she only loved me, but never told me why she did it. Are relationship had been shaky for 2 months and she went on a tangent about how she was going nowhere in live and believe it was because she was always worried about keeping the relationship going to care about anything else, so we decided to take a \"break\" if you will (we're not seeing each other, but were not seeing anybody else either). \n\nA couple of days pass and today I decide to check her fb again when I see that the pics where gone, but now it says that they've been a relationship a couple of days before my dad had called \n\nI just don't know what to do now, I feel if I talk to her about it again she's just going to give me some kinda excuse, but there's no way for me to be 100 percent sure if she is or not; and even if she is, why not just break up with me and let me move on???", "summary": "Her facebook tells me she's cheating, she says she's not, but there's no way of me proving her wrong so all I can do is believe her"}
{"id": "t3_19ciqd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 F] need some advice about staying with my boyfriend's [23 M][6.5 years] family", "post": "This Saturday I am leaving for the Florida Keys, where my boyfriend's parents are currently vacationing. His parents asked him and me to fly down and spend a week with them. They are staying in their trailer and my boyfriend and I will be sleeping in a tent on the beach nearby.\n\nMy boyfriend's parents are...not my biggest fans. Let's just say that liberal, nerdy, tattooed, and religiously apathetic were not on the list of things they were hoping for when their son brought a girl home. Nonetheless, they've accepted that after 6.5 years with their son, I'm not going anywhere any time soon, and while I don't see them or speak to them very often (boyfriend and I live 3,000 miles away), they do include me in bigger events such as this.\n\nMy boyfriend's father is working on building a relationship with me. It's clear that he doesn't accept me 100%, but he's working on it, and I've told him how much I appreciate it. My boyfriend's mother is strictly civil with me...most of the time. Sometimes she can be mean in that high school girl kind of way, where it's kind of subtle but I still receive the message that she's trying to send.\n\nI mostly fear for this trip because the last time I saw my boyfriend's family (Christmas), his mother was very openly rude to me. The day previous, she had told my boyfriend that she didn't think I was good enough for him. Both my boyfriend and his father defended me, so she was very hostile when she saw me the next day. I haven't spoken to her since, but I don't know if I could deal with that sort of hostility again for 9 straight days.\n\nI really want to have a good time on this trip, but diffusing hostility is not something I'm really good at. What can I do if any arises?", "summary": "My boyfriend's mother doesn't really like me, and I'm going to be on a 9 day long vacation with her. What can I do if there's any tension?"}
{"id": "t3_120fuh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is something you wish people knew about your job that would make it easier for you?", "post": "I work at a technical support help desk (I answer phones and provide support). I think one the most frustrating things about working as a support is when I try give the caller a reason for their issue, they believe it to not be correct. I'll elaborate with a story.\n\nSomeone calls in regarding an issue with logging in to blah blah. I ask what error message they receive. From her response I know that they are just using an incorrect password. I inform them that they are using an incorrect password. IMMEDIATELY they respond with, \"NO that is wrong I've had the same password for years.\" I reset their password and tell them to log in with the new password. They say, \"NOPE it's not working, don't you think it's my old password that I've been using for 2 years.\" I then begin to use their default username and the reset password to try and log in to see if their is an issue or that I might've put in the wrong reset password. I use the credentials and I log in. Surprise. I inform them that they should try again and now MAGICALLY it works for them... (surprise!). They then ask me what it could have been? I have to tell them it could have been a multitude of things when in fact, it was their fault all along. Sometimes I just want to say it was your own fault, idiot.", "summary": "I know what i'm talking about because it's my job to know. If you know the answer then why did you call me for help?"}
{"id": "t3_3nc5bm", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I have no clue what I want to do with my life now or in the future.", "post": "I've reached yet another rut in my life. I'm a 20 year old junior in college, and I decided that I wanted to change my major from sociology to something in the natural sciences. I'm taking the classes required for a chem major, and I'm failing general chem II. I've done Kahn, YouTube, and tutors. Nothing has helped. Even if I did earn a chem degree, I have no idea what I would do with it. I can't narrow down anything that I want to do. I get really gung-ho about certain careers, but it only lasts a little while. Like, over the summer I wanted to be a civil affairs officer for the Army. Now I want to be a physician's assistant/radio dj/tattoo artist???? In sum, I've lost my sense of purpose. When someone asks me, \"Well what are your interests?\" I can't answer that. There literally isn't much that I actually enjoy doing. I don't even like most TV shows. I don't have a hobby, except working out occasionally. All of my friends are my boyfriend's friends, and I'm not interested in playing Magic with them for hours on end. I hate sitting still. I'm trying to make my own friends, but self-esteem issues have really been getting in the way. Without a sense of purpose, I don't feel smart anymore. I feel like I have nothing that defines me, and I have nothing to add to any type of relationship. I'm just sort of there, and I'm always afraid of being annoying or a burden. I'm just generally really insecure in relationships of any kind. I've tried the \"my next move\" website, and it really wasn't helpful.", "summary": "Don't know what to do with my life or even in my spare time. I don't take joy in very many things."}
{"id": "t3_3ee1eu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I (34m) break off engagement with her (24f) over her reaction to my cat's passing?", "post": "My fiancee, whom I've been with for just over three years, and I have had a number of fights recently, but I've chalked them up to growing pains, and the fact that she's from an emotionally abusive household. However, I feel that she's been cruel to me now, and I'm not sure if I should try to move past it or if it should be a dealbreaker.\n\nI had a cat, and my fiancee didn't like her. Whatever - some people don't like cats (my mother was terrified of them and would go out of her way to avoid them...something about her having seen an uncle get mauled by one when she was a child...)\n\nThe kitty died the day before yesterday, and it's left me very distraught. Not only did I love the cat, but I inherited her from my aunt, who passed away just over four years ago. I'm so sad about it. I told my fiancee about it yesterday morning, and she said she was sorry about it.\n\nI didn't talk to the fiancee all day yesterday, but when we did talk in the evening, she was in a bad mood and just said that she didn't see why I'd get so worked up over a cat. I told her I thought she was being uncaring, and she said, essentially, \"I don't need this,\" and hung up. We talked again, and she told me she thought I was telling her how to feel when I told her that she should try to be a nice, supportive person regardless of how she felt about the cat, or if she understood it or not.\n\nNow I haven't talked to her since then.\n\nWhat should I do?", "summary": "My cat died, and fiancee acted very dismissive and hasn't been remotely comforting. Could she really be marriage material?"}
{"id": "t3_u2a9c", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Advice needed!", "post": "In need of a little advice here. Back in 2009 my current girlfriend and I graduated from college, me with a degree in accounting and her with a degree in marketing. It took me roughly a year to land a job in my career field; my girlfriend, however, was not so lucky. Taking menial and tedious jobs she tried to make the most of it. \n\nFast forward to 2012, she accepts a part-time job and makes the decision to return to school. This time, however, to take courses for her to able to attend Pharmacy school.\n\nEnrolling as a part-time student, she takes the necessary classes she needs to meet her Pharmacy prerequisites. However, because of the weird curriculum of her university, one of her classes doesn't meet the Pharmacy requirements and so ultimately she drops it in favor of a class that does. \n\nTwist occurs when it turns out the class that met her Pharmacy prerequisite does not meet her university's prerequisite for the upper level classes she needs. So now she has to take additional classes just to meet those prerequisites. This of course means that it will take her longer to take her PCATs and ultimately longer to get into Pharmacy school. She doesn't want to be in school the rest of her twenties nor does she want to be burdened with additional debt/expenses while reaching her goal. \n\nI guess I'm unsure of what to do; I try to be supportive as possible, hearing her out, letting her express her frustrations but it doesn't seem to work. What are her or my options here? I don't wanna be useless.", "summary": "girlfriend heads back to school after 3 years of unsuccessful job opportunities. Takes classes need for her goal only to get sidetracked by her shitty university's scheduling."}
{"id": "t3_ythd3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "my girlfriend (f20) and me (m21) broke up after a nearly 5.5 year relationship and i want her back.", "post": "we've had our share of problems but we overcame everything.\n\nover the last year i started to be too active in my own activities and i stopped showing intrest in her activities. i did not do this knowingly! she also didn't realise it so we couldn't talk about it \n\nlast wednesday we were talking about how our relationship changed over the last couple of months and how we became to much as normal friends. the reason was my behaviour, my neglaction of her, made her lose intrest in me in a intimate way. \n\nshe is everything to me and i wanted to do whatever it takes to stay together with her but i can't seem to make her believe it can really be done in the long run. \n\nwe agreed to stay friends, but in trying to make her believe i can change, i would only push her away from me and the thought of her being completely out of my life terrifies me more than anything\n\nshe is everything i want in a woman and there is no doubt in my mind that this is the woman i want to grow old with.", "summary": "relationship of nearly 5.5 year ended because of me not showing her the intrest i should have given her. despritely looking for a way to convince her i can and will change without risking to lose her as a friend."}
{"id": "t3_3zlvaq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31 M] with my girlfirend [28 F] of about 6 months, feels unloved at times from lack of public expressions of love.", "post": "I have been with my gf for about six months now. We spend a lot of time together and have traveled together. Things are amazing. She is absolutely wonderful and makes me incredibly happy. One on one she can see the love I have for her.\n\nShe is a very loving; hearts, flowers, open, individual, so sharing her feelings with the world come natural and easy. I am an much more of the engineer type and don't feel comfortable posting mushy things to social media. I'm not a big social media sharer in the first place and she is (it's how she keeps contact with family abroad).\n\nI know it would be very helpful if I just sucked it up and expressed my love publicly but something about that just feels forced and wrong to me. \n\nShould I have no issues with this expression? She is a bit saddened that I don't gush about her to others. I guess it makes her question how strongly I feel about her.", "summary": "I don't feel comfortable writing sappy things on Facebook and my girlfriend takes it as me not loving her enough at times."}
{"id": "t3_3spm8j", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "ibprofin to treat sore throat?", "post": "Woke up this morning with a sore throat.  Drank some water and sucked on a ricola, which relieved the symptoms enough for me to go back to sleep for another cycle.\n\nNot sure if it was due to breathing in the cloud of mystery dust when I shook off the debris from the large dust mop at work, or if I just got a little bit of a cold, but either way, it's still persisting a bit after eating some food, showering, and having another lozenge.  It's not unbearable by any means, but I'd was thinking, hey, if I take an ibprofin I should be in good shape.  [But then I read of an experiment from a couple years ago] showing that ibprofin, in contrast to paracetamol, could increase the duration of symptoms, theorized as potentially due to a decreased immune response as a result of the reduced inflammation.\n\nThe methodology for conducting the experiment seemed random, and thus accurate, but I'm not sure if it been replicated, or if there is a more detailed report.\n\n>The randomised control trial recruited 899 patients who presented at their GP with respiratory tract infection symptoms. They received different treatment types; paracetamol, ibuprofen or a combination of both. Participants were then told to either take it as needed or at regular intervals (four times a day) and some were also told to take steam inhalation.", "summary": "Can I take ibprofin to treat my sore throat without worrying about making the symptoms last longer? Or should I just stick with ricola and water?"}
{"id": "t3_h47fv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Make me draw stuff, and save the future!", "post": "So, here's the deal:\nI should be finishing my sophomore year of college, but I'm not. I think that cleared that up enough. I haven't even finished my freshman year. I am capable but my grades are in the toilet, and I'm just now deciding that maybe I should use my *artistic* talent as a means of survival. \n\nSince leaving high school, though. I have lost much of my inspiration to draw! I'm not saying I'm an *artist*, but I know I'm creative, and I seem to have an absolute block. There is nothing I want to draw. That's where you come in Reddit, tell me what to draw, and I will do it on my brand new tablet that my girlfriend bought me. Also, if it makes my desperation sound any more convincing- if I don't put together a portfolio and get in to a college, I will not be able to pay for my computer. I just got fired from my carpentry job. Hell yeah! So, I'm **ASKING** you reddit, what should I draw?", "summary": "I have no work and don't go to school. Help me put together a portfolio by forcing me to draw you stuff with my tablet. That is, as long as I can still afford my computer while this post is up!"}
{"id": "t3_4d2eda", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (18f) actually broach the subject of my feelings to a friend (20f/21m)", "post": "Just to start, so you understand the stoey better, I have Autism (high-functioning) and so I'm not the best at social situations or being expressive.  \n\nI've been hit with a sort of bad week. To recap, my girlfriend of 3.5 years left me, and I recently found out she was cheating on me for the last four months of the relationship. I also recently had to go to the hospital for severe headaches, ones that physically kept me up at night due to the pain. 5 days later,  I finally decided they weren't leaving and went to ER, where they gave me migraine medication and told me that, although they weren't sure why I had headaches, they guessed based on location and pain that I had cluster headaches. They then proceeded to give me medication for it and sent me on my way.\n\nNow, I've had an outpouring of support from my friends and family, and in specific, one person said to me - if you ever need to talk, I'm down. I'd really like to take them up on that, but I'm not very social or expressive, and don't want to come off as weird. On top of that, I just sort of want to talk to this person and have my problems organically work their way into the story, rather than focus on me and all my issues. \n\nAny thoughts, advice, etc?", "summary": "I want to talk to a friend who offered to help, but I'm nervous and socially dumb and don't want to seem needy or in general weird."}
{"id": "t3_4gtlnr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I stop being mopey and attached to a selfish boy?", "post": "So long back story ahead. Basically I was in a relationship for about 6-7 months (he's 20, I'm a 19 year old female) and then he decided he wanted to travel Europe and figure out what he wanted from life, so that meant us breaking up. It was my first real boyfriend, as I've been scared of commitment for a while, so he is the only guy I've ever brought home. The day he left we both cried our eyes out, and he didn't even want to leave anymore. We told each other no expectations, but I guess emotions got the better of us and we discussed that we would get back together when he's back. I've been coping so well with it up to this point because we've still had communication, it's still felt as though he's there. That's changed now though after he decided to avoid me altogether. We skyped, snapchatted, messaged eachother, the works; even while he's in Europe. Now I'm lucky to get a response back, and I asked him recently if me talking to him is making him sad, all he said was that he's \"all good, just really busy\" which I don't really buy. I've travelled Europe, and I always had oodles of time between flights, trains, car trips and so forth to catch up with everyone and read. I don't believe he would lie about not caring, but I think he's just hiding the truth. Perhaps he's over me? Wants to be single? Or maybe he just isn't infatuated with me enough to bother. I honestly have no way of knowing, but it still doesn't stop me from thinking about it all. the. time. The way he behaves makes me question whether or not we should get back together, and I just wish I could move on and stop thinking. I try to see other guys and keep myself occupied, but it doesn't work. It's just so frustrating to have the one person I finally let myself trust knowingly go ahead and further amplify my anxieties about commitment. It also stings knowing how happy he is compared to me.", "summary": "My first ex boyfriend who dumped me to travel Europe and left me with the possibility of getting back together when he returns keeps avoiding me, how do I cope when keeping myself busy isn't enough?"}
{"id": "t3_4ye94k", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Should I have lied about this in a job interview? Was I expected to?", "post": "I've always been honest in applications, interviews, etc., so when I was at a job interview for a job I desperately need this morning and was asked what my future plans were, I told the truth: I'll be in the city for another year and then will go to graduate school from then on, and so I'm looking for a 1 year position.\n\nThe interviewer stopped the interview then and said he \"appreciated my honesty, but [he] had to be honest with [me]\" and that, despite otherwise being hirable, he couldn't justify hiring/training someone who would be gone in a year. He said twice, though, that if anything were to change and I were to decide not to go to graduate school and put it off for a year, to contact him.\n\nShould I not tell interviewers that I am looking for a one year position, even though it's true? I feel like I'm screwing them over if I do, but at the same time, it's a temporary job and I have good references otherwise, so is that even a real concern other than from a conscience standpoint? Should I contact him in a day or two and say I rethought my time schedule and would like to stay in town for an additional year, even though that's not true? I feel almost like he was hinting that I should do that, but I can't imagine that's actually the case.", "summary": "Only going to be in town for a year, places don't want to hire someone that won't be here long-term. Should I lie about my timeline so I get the job?"}
{"id": "t3_2ipseg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my crush [(20-21) F] ~1.5 months, unsure of direction", "post": "So there's a girl that I've been talking to for the last month and a half. We'll call her Haley for now. I met Haley online, and we had been talking for a few days to a week when I decided to ask her out. She ended up calling the date off with a plausible excuse, so I waited to see if she would contact me about rescheduling.\n\nShe did.\n\nWhile planning this new date, Haley was, at first, showing ALL the right signs, basically giving me the go-ahead to continue pressing forward, possibly into relationshipville. A few days before, she calls me and says that she didn't want to meet up because she, like me, is fresh out of breakupsville.\n\nAfter laying the issue to rest, I continue on with my life, when, suddenly, my father has a heart attack. Haley found out about the event on social media (I did not tell her) and gave me a call to not only pass on her best wishes, but also to say\n\n\"Even though I really feel like a relationship isn't the right place for me right now, I still enjoy talking to you and would like to continue doing so.\"\n\nNow for the question. What is my next move? Is there a next move? Is she simply being nice, or could something be there if/when she decides she's ready to date again? Am I losing too much sleep over this?", "summary": "Me + girl + both of us getting over breakups = her cancelling dates yet still calling back. Something there, or nah? Still recommend reading everything."}
{"id": "t3_2qg9ds", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31 M] with my new interest [28 F] 2 months", "post": "edit: I had posted this yesterday, but deleted it because I felt a bit uncomfortable with myself putting it online. I'm not really sure if this will help, or just reinforce negative emotions. \n\nI had recently been talking with a girl for about 2 months. We had gone out on about 6 dates, and most of them would end up just crashing at my place, no sex we'd kiss and fool around a bit, which is new/cool. But through out the week we would text, not incessantly but generally throught a day or continue to the next day. Anyway she asked to just relax and watch movies at my place last weekend so we did, everything seemed cool, except an odd vibe after she left. But it seems like there is just a vibe of her trying to distance her self at thi spoint, if I text she'll respond, but isn't really trying to create a conversation or hasn't initiated one. It just seemed like a pretty quick change from just a week or 2 ago. Of course I've always been one to over anaylize so I'm not sure if I'm just doing that or not.  I did wish her a happy xmas eve and she responded and we texted back and forth for a while.  Then I texted her late xmas day (with some advice from a friend, suggesting I do what I want and not worry about others feelings) so I texted merry christmas, she texted back the same and actually asked how mine was, still not long.  \nThe biggest Issues I'm having are, I wasn't hooked before I started feeling her pull away, now I all of sudden am in a funk and can't stop wanting to find out if I'm crazy.  I'm also concerned I maybe creating a self-fifulling prophecy, and either become overbearing.  Or she could think I'm pushing her away because I'm trying not to text her... I just really do not know what to do/ or think...", "summary": "Recent girl I've been dating seems to be distancing herself, or I could just be reading to much into everything again. Either way any suggestions how I should react."}
{"id": "t3_373qsf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 F] think my best friend [25 M] is in love with me", "post": "I've been friends with him for about a year. He expressed interest in dating me, but I turned him down because I am a lesbian. So we became good friends. He would occasionally make suggestive comments about my appearance, but I put it down to him just having a very flirty personality. He can be really immature, but he had a couple of months stint in jail over a stupid fight with another guy and when he came out, he was changed for the better. He had matured a lot and wasn't flirty, or touchy-feely with me. He seemed to really get it that we were just friends and I would not \"turn straight\" like he hoped. That didn't last long. \n\nHe texted me the other day that he wanted to kiss me, which freaked me out. He's going to move in with me on the first because he is unhappy where he is living and I am not having good luck with roommates. It just made sense, but now I'm concerned us living together would give him the wrong idea. I used to drink a lot and he told me once if he caught me while I was super drunk, he would take advantage of me. I never drink anymore, but I have been worrying about that comment because I have been raped before and if he's going to be living with me... I mean, I really don't think he's that type of person, but still. Should I still let him move in with me?", "summary": "My best friend who I worry is in love with me is set to move in with me next month. Is it a good idea to live with him?"}
{"id": "t3_2dhao7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] wanting to be with a friend I know [19 F], but I am too paranoid.", "post": "I am a 23 year old male named Patrick who has been admiring this girl , Naomi, for at least a year when I met up with her at an anime convention. I hadn't talked to her much, and then this year about a week ago I agreed to do a partner cosplay with her(because I was a guy she knew through another friend). We did the cosplay and we talked and laughed. We had a lot of fun, but I am not adept at seeing signs of when a girl likes you. I have had girlfriends in the past, but they have all approached me so I have absolutely no experience when I am the chaser. I have her number and we have been texting a bit, but nothing too important. I thought she had a boyfriend, but I cannot confirm it. I wouldn't want to infringe on a relationship for sake of karma. I don't want anything sexual from her; I am just genuinely attracted to her and her personality. I am obsessed with her. I cannot stop thinking about her and when I do I go right back. I am very depressed. I am able to function, but all I do is listen to Lana Del Ray all day and cry wishing I could be with her. Now the easy answer is just ask her if she wants to go out/has a boyfriend/etc., but even if I was able to muster up the courage, I wouldn't be able to cope. I am extremely paranoid in relationships sometimes. In the beginning, it is fine...but if I see or hear something that threatens me or my relationship, I lose myself into depression, anger, and pain. I want her, but I don't know if I should have her. Maybe I don't deserve her, but it breaks my heart thinking about it. \nI know the obvious choice is to ignore it, but I may never get a second chance... Reddit please help.", "summary": "I am a manic depressive, paranoid person with hopes of dating a girl who I am madly obsessed with, but don't know if it is healthy. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_q3ba1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need help finding a creative outlet, suggestions?", "post": "Years ago I had a job in the video game industry that pushed my thoughts and kept me active. However the past year I've been working for [Confidential due to NDA] but it's within the video game industry just more of a translation to a Lead Coach in Technical Support. It's in no way creative and extremely boring. This is where my problem is though.\n\nLike many, I excel in many areas but I am no master of one. As a video game producer, this is good because you have to know everything about well... everything. For instance, in design I can tell what is good design and what is bad, along with constructive criticism as to why but having me design it from scratch it just isn't my thing. I'm more of the 'ideas guy' you could say. I've written a few story lines and designs for a video game, though they can be books, short stories, novels, graphic novels, the premise is there for anything. Is there a way I can do something with this and have a creative outlet? Is there someone out there on Reddit who wants to be a professional writer but needs the ideas to begin with? I can tell you the plot points, character backgrounds, scenarios, situations, you name it I'm just not going to kid myself that I can make it magical and pop out on paper someone would want to read it.", "summary": "I need to do something creative with someone who loves to write. I can provide the ideas you make it wonderful. Thoughts on how to do this or maybe another creative outlet?"}
{"id": "t3_4r9izc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my gf [25 F] duration 1 year, How to gently encourage new cloths/style/appearance.", "post": "I've [30 M] fallen into a relationship with a wonderful smart person for about 1.5 years.  In our year together I've found her to be an amazing and supportive person with a relatively good sex life (the year has been stressful for both of us so its been a little tough).  She is in the hard sciences and is extremely technical minded and thats great because we always have something new to talk about.  In addition to this we are long distance at the moment, but If my job hunting goes well I'll end up in a major city about 2 hours away from her (which I call a near distance relationship).\n\nNow I know appearances are not everything but its not nothing either.  She is very attractive, however she does not wear clothing that is flattering to her.  She does not like to spend money on anything trendy for example eye glasses that might look a little nicer even though the serve the same purpose as her unflattering eye glasses.  She has also recently lost a bunch of weight so right now seems like a good time to address new cloths, because she is going to be buying some.\n\nThe problem is I recognize that her clothes and choice in accessories is a very personal choice.  But i'd also like to encourage her to refine her style and clothing, but it obviously needs to be things she likes to wear and feel good in.  I'd almost like to just buy her some cloths but... sizing and this kind of logistics seams weird.\n\nHow do I address the question of style with out being insulting and further more how do I do it with out overly imposing my own taste?", "summary": "My gf is hot, but she dresses in lame cloths.  How to get her in cloths as hot as she is?"}
{"id": "t3_35gegt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my fiance [24 F] of 3 years, She wants to be nicer to me but doesn't know how?", "post": "I've been with my fiance for 3 and a half years now.  She is bi-polar and I have ADD and depression.  We both go to therapy, and we both (admittedly) have good days and bad days with respect to our emotional states.\n\nRecently she's noticed that she isn't very nice to me.  In fact she can be pretty darn scary.  Scary to the point that it affects the communication in our relationship.  I find myself unable to express opinions without fear of her lashing out because of what I said.  She's aware of this and expressed a desire to be nicer to me.  She said that she doesn't like to be mean to me and that I don't deserve it, but she doesn't know how.  She said that she's afraid it will ultimately ruin our relationship and asked for my help.  \n\nI have no clue how to help her be nicer to me.  Any ideas or experience with this?", "summary": "My fiance wants me to help her to be nicer to me because she doesn't know how (and neither do I)."}
{"id": "t3_3kjhv8", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "I need help getting started", "post": "Hello everyone,\n\nI have been lurking on this sub for quite some time but this is the first time im posting. I need help getting started down the right path to losing weight. I've been saying that I would be healthier for a while now, but at this point im not even 100% sure I know what that means.\n\nA little background about me, I am a 22 y/o M that currently weighs between 385-390 lbs. I am currently working full time and going to graduate school (which leaves me tired and gives little time to do anything else). I am a former athlete, I was actually playing two sports in college as recent as april, but ive spiraled downwards since then. I was 280 pounds when I graduated high school and 340 when I graduated college. In the four months  since ive graduated ive gained 45 pounds mostly due to continuing my crap eating habits (way too much fast food and fried food) without really working out. \n\nI've known for a while that I needed to make a serious change, but it didnt really hit me until this morning when I went to put on a button up shirt for work and it ripped when I bent over. I know that this has gotten kind of rambling, but I guess the core question is how do you start? How did you break your fast food and junk food addiction and learn how to eat right (And what to even eat in the first place)? How do you motivate yourself to work out when you have little time and you're exausted (on tuesday-thursday I leave the house at 6:30am and get back at 8:15pm, so I feel like I never have the time to work out). What workouts did you do that you felt helped the most with limited time?\n\nSorry that this got so long, and if you read this far I really thank you. I just need help and im not exactly sure where to start. I just dont want to be so miserable and tired anymore", "summary": "I'm obese, dont want to be obese any more. Need help getting started with what to eat, what the best workouts are for me. Etc."}
{"id": "t3_1how9t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[22F] Confused about being ready to start dating again. When did you know?", "post": "Hi, I'm a 22F, and recently I started dating a guy from my university [21M]. \n\nI've been almost exclusively single since my last long term relationship two years ago, but through the fall and winter last year I had a very serious fling. My guy [25M] and I fell very hard for one another over the course of a few months (it did not work out well in the end. He had to move to a different continent). It was quite a difficult break-up (if you could call it one), and I was really not even able to face real closure until a month ago when we spoke for what is now the last time. \n\nBack to my dilemma now. I have mixed feelings about this new dating dynamic so far. This new guy is sweet, very kind, attractive, and we have a decent amount in common, so there's no reason I should not be ecstatic about us dating. Despite this, I feel very vulnerable right now, and I do not want to get hurt as badly as I did from my last fling, so I think I'm clamming up a little bit. My problem is that I can't tell if I'm over-thinking this all, if we simply don't have chemistry, or if I'm not ready to be dating someone else. (Or even if it's fair to continue to date the the new guy if I'm having second thoughts)", "summary": "Had a bad breakup a while ago, but now I'm starting to date. How will I know that I'm truly ready to start dating again?"}
{"id": "t3_1z78qr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 F] feel like our club president [21 M] violated our privacy by sending out an email reminder", "post": "Someone just sent a bulk email to all the members who didn't pay dues in our student organization. They listed each of the member's names, along with how much they exactly owed in the body of the email.\n\nTo me, it seems like this is a big violation of privacy (thought that he should have used a BCC instead), but I wanted Reddit's opinion to see if I wasn't overreacting? He's a bit of a control freak, so I'm not sure if that's part of it or if it's me overreacting as well (or maybe a bit of both).\n\nDepending on what you guys think, I was thinking of sending him an email saying that this is something that he shouldn't have done and how he should BCC everyone's emails instead.\n\nThanks!", "summary": "private information (including how much money we each owed) and our email addresses were sent out in a club email and I think he shouldn't have done that because it's a violation of privacy. Am I overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_3b6xym", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My close friend [20F] barely speaks to me [20M] after a year away at university.", "post": "(Just to clarify, she is my friend, we are not dating.)\n\nI have a close friend that I have known for several years. In September she moved cities for university.\n\nWe hung out a few times when she came back home for the weekend and everything seemed ok.\n\nWe were talking less than normal but that's to be expected since were both in school but I tried my best to stay in touch.\n\nDuring second semester we barely spoke. I thought I could get things back on track when the summer started.\n\nShe has been back home for 2 months now, still barely speaking to me and I haven't seen her in 7 months. I've asked her to hang out several times.\n\nI'm not sure how to approach this, I don't want to make things complicated with her. I afraid maybe we just drifted apart and there's nothing I can do to fix it.", "summary": "Close friend isn't talking to me, haven't seen her in 7 months. And I have no idea how to talk to her about it or if I even should."}
{"id": "t3_3haw0m", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by relying on Siri to wake up", "post": "First off, fuck Siri. \n\nSo here's the story..\n\nI love Porter Robinson. He's an electronic music producer and his music is just amazing. I had been looking for live shows of his to go to recently and Porter's show was just sitting there like a million dollars right on my porch. \n\nSo my dad decided to get me the ticket since I finally got a summer job going. \n\nToday is the day boys. My first live show for one of my favorite musicians. All I gotta do is go to driver's ed, come back home, **take a nap**, and leave so I can make the 7:00 show. Easy enough right?\n\nDriver's ed goes smoothly so I get back home and get to my bed. \n\n\"Hey Siri, wake me up at five\" I say to my phone. Here I'm thinking \"This is good. I'll be up and fully awake to enjoy the live show\"\n\nI wake up the noise of groceries being put down and my step mom baby talking to our new born. In a panic, I look at the clock.\n\n7:17\n\nHO-LY SHIT FUCK. I managed to do it. I managed to fuck up the only thing I was excited for that day.. for the whole break for that matter. \n\nI need some help guys. I've never been so disappointed with myself. Not only did I waste my dads money, but I manage to rely so much on a piece of metal that I miss what might've been the shining memory of my 2015 summer.\n\nIn the off chance that any Porter fans see this..\n\nIs he going to do any more shows in Japan near Tokyo?\n\nI want to make this right. Pay back my dad and make it to a show.", "summary": "Missed a live show of my favorite musician because I told Siri to set an alarm at 5PM and it set it at 5AM."}
{"id": "t3_3bfxnm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [31F] trying to regain sexual attraction to my husband[30M] of 2 years, after an affair. X-post from r/sex", "post": "Long story short I had an affair. The man I had the affair with is exactly physically my type. Even before the affair began (we were best friends) every time I was around him I'd be overcome with lust. Every inch of him was perfect in my opinion, and our sex life was amazing. I eventually left my husband for him, but things fizzled before they truly began because he's mentally unstable and he became a danger to himself and others.\n\nSince then my husband and I have been working things out between us (there were deep issues we had before the affair that drove us apart) and it's actually going quite well. We're both ready to forgive, forget and move on, but there is one really big issue that so far I've not been able to overcome.\n\nI am no longer sexually attracted to my husband. Physically he was never truly my type, but because I fell in love with his personality I wound up being very turned on by him. He and I explored our sexuality together and we had an INCREDIBLE sex life full of kinks and orgasms and everything I could ever want.\n\nBut now I can't get turned on by him unless I'm drinking and already turned on to an extent. If he tries to initiate it all feels wrong. I can't stop comparing him to my friend. I can be in the mood and my husband will kiss me and there's just nothing there, or worse, I get disgusted. My husband is aware of my feelings and lack of drive toward him and is being very patient with everything.\n\nI don't want to feel this way anymore, I want my intimacy and my sex life back and don't have any idea how to make that happen.\n\n(we are in couple's counseling and individual counseling as well)", "summary": "I had an affair, have returned to my husband, we have reconciled, but I am not physically attracted to my husband and I want to be."}
{"id": "t3_4yh7ov", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[16M] girlfriend of 3 months [17] uncle (a cop) busted me smoking weed while i told her i don't smoke.", "post": "My girlfriend is against smoking pot so when we got together i told her i didn't smoke although i had been smoking for a couple months.\n\nNow a couple days ago i bought some weed and we were smoking in a park at around 11pm when suddenly two cops come at us, take our weed and ask for identification and so forth. I knew one of the cops was her uncle but he doesn't know me so he couldn't have told her already. I'm scared shitless and i don't know what to do right now. should i tell her what happened? Or is it best to keep my mouth shut and see what time brings?", "summary": "Got caught smoking weed by my girlfriends uncle(a cop who doesn't know me yet) and don't know if i should tell her or not."}
{"id": "t3_t54n9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the worst way you've cock-blocked yourself guys and gals of Reddit?", "post": "A buddy of mine told me his story a while back so here goes. We'll call him Ethan, because that's his name, and he'd somehow managed to bring an older girl round his house. He was in Year 10 and she was in Year 11 (basically he was 15 she was 16). She asked him if he wanted to 'get off' (not sure if you guys on the other side of the pond use this phrase but she was basically asking if he wanted a handjob) and he replied 'No thanks I can do it by myself'. Much face-palming occurred when he realised what he'd done.", "summary": "An older girl asked my buddy if he wanted a handjob and he turned her down insisting he can do it by himself."}
{"id": "t3_1f8nod", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Adoption is the wrong choice for most of the kids I work with...", "post": "I work in special education, specifically with emotionally disturbed kids. The past 6 months all of my students who were in foster found potential permanent homes. Sounds great right? Even better, all of those homes ended up working out, in each case the new parents were ready to sign the dotted line and take on the responsibility of a victim of trauma. Even better still; all but one of the families were in district, so I would be able to continue working with the students (some of them I've been with for 4 years now). Can this get any better? Yes, my students would finally have someone to call \"Mom\" or \"Dad\" or both. \n\nOnly we discovered a problem, a major problem. Once an adoption is finalized, all funding and resources coming from the state to pay for things like Therapy are completely cut. That means you take a child who from birth to the age of 5 was sexually and physically abused, put them into the system, get them finally comfortable opening up to a therapist, get the ball rolling so they are making serious educational and emotional progress, find them a placement, then cut all those supports out from underneath them. How is that fair to the child or the families who want to adopt those children? \n\nJust today I had a meeting with the entire support team for one of these children and, being the case manager I had to inform the potential adoptive parents that the entire financial burden of continued treatment will be solely on them. Basically, I have to help these people cheat the system in order to best serve my students. It feels really unethical to me, and I feel like it really disappoints the students when they're not officially adopted, they crave safe permanency. \n\nThe only silver lining in this is that in all the cases I've worked with, the county has agreed to allow these new families to be the new foster families and these students DO have a permanent home, and finally someone to call \"mom\" or \"dad,\" when they're ready to.", "summary": "In Ohio, if you adopt, financial support for any therapy for your adopted child gets cut immediately upon the paperwork being processed. I have to tell potential adopters this information."}
{"id": "t3_10hva0", "subreddit": "self", "title": "18 no direction in life after dropping out of law school", "post": "I'm 18, finished high school with great grades and entered law school (Australian so people can enter right out of high school) but it's a course I feel little conncetion to and with limited career opportunities at the moment. I skipped a year of high school so had a spare year and decided to try it out. Little was lost and I developed my thinking skills in law but I've decided to drop out and have no idea what to study.\n\nI enjoy learning and connecting different fields of human study and find it near impossible to limit myself to one topic and area, for that reason history is by far my best subject as that reflects the interwoven nature of the world and want to help the world with whatever I do. What direction can an intelligent young adult take in university if this is the way he sees the world? I feel like with near limitless choice I'll end up making the wrong choices and be miserable.", "summary": "Dropped out of law school, passionate about everything so at a loss for what to study and what direction to take my life"}
{"id": "t3_2q4ufc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/F] with my [22/F] 2 years, We're taking a break after some cheating, other relationship issues", "post": "My girlfriend and I have/had been dating for 2 years. We recently made some major life moves - graduated from college, moved to NYC, dealt with employment/unemployment. She cheated on me. We were having some issues with my unemployment, paying the bills, feeling tied down and burdened. So I broke up with her. A few days later we decided that breaking up wasn't really what we wanted so now we're taking a break.\n\nBy break I mean - us moving into separate apartments, speaking as little as possible outside of logistical stuff, both working on getting our lives together independently, figuring out what we need both from one another and from life at large. We're going to reassess the situation in mid-February. So far, I've been able to get myself a fulltime job in my field and sign up with a ceramics studio - both of which are a pretty big deal for me, I'll spare you the details. \n\nBasically I'm asking for advice from those who have taken a break. If we do get back together, how do I just pick up where we left off? How do I get over the cheating? What if I want to get back together and she does nice or vice versa. Any advice or personal experience related to this will be helpful. Thanks a lot.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I are taking a break. Any advice for dealing with a break/getting back together after time apart."}
{"id": "t3_3sgnio", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it even worth it - I like him but he's ignoring me - Advice required", "post": "So me[24F] and this guy [30M] met on tinder and have been hanging out, hooking up, talking on the phone all that great stuff for about 6 months now. We've really connected with each other but he's still dating other girls and I'm not. We are not in a relationship but, have invested time and energy on each other to make things progress. \n\nAnyways, here's where it got complicated... he made a snarkly comment about girls he met on tinder and sex, which I ended up getting offended about because I assumed it applied to me aswell. I told him it came off rude.. and then he suddenly lashes out on me. We get into a heated conversation say mean stuff to each other.. things escalate.. and then I decide to profusely apologize and call him to fix things... but ofcourse he totally ignores all my attempts of communication.. so the ball's in his court but i can't concentrate on anything..\n\nHe was extremely upset and now has made it clear that he doesn't care or want to talk to me. I really like this guy and we had a great connection, I would hate it if this ended in such bad terms.. Is it even worth chasing this man if he won't respond to my communication? Do you think there's a chance of us fixing our relationship?", "summary": "Talked to this guy for 6 months, not my boyfriend, got into heated conversation. I apologized to mend things, he is unresponsive - 3 missed calls, 3 text message - 3 ans. msgs left"}
{"id": "t3_1n05u4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Nervous and unsure, help with asking my (M/17) crush (16/F) out?", "post": "Hi, so I've known this girl now for probably about 8 months or so and I'd say we're pretty good friends. We chat regularly and had some pretty private conversations. Thing is I have no clue with telling when a girl likes you. I'm horrid with girls. \n\nNow my best friends have been pushing me to simply tell her exactly how I feel and I've been too damn nervous about ruining our friendship, especially since I value it so much. Now one of my best friends has threatened that if I don't tell her myself within a week, that he'll tell her for me. (Now whether he would actually go through with that is like a 50/50 chance). \n\nSo I guess I was just wondering if anyone had some advice that would help me with asking my crush out, hopefully in a way that if she rejects me we can remain friends. \n(If it helps any she's a huge BBC Sherlock fan.)", "summary": "Crush on a girl I've known for almost a year, extremely nervous about ruining friendship by asking her out. Seeking advice on how I should ask her out."}
{"id": "t3_fznqx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Question for the ladies: What are girls thinking when you give someone a phone number on a night out (when you are already in a relationship)?", "post": "Hi ya'll (Mr. ThrowAwayAccountHere),\n\nTwo weeks ago, after my weekly regimen of climbing on Saturday afternoons, I was totally exhausted and ready for a chill evening with a few nice beers (Samichlaus is hella good).\n\nI get a phone call from another friend telling me to go out and as Intergalatic law dictates that spontaneous nights out are always the best, I decided to go. All in all, I had a blast and after running on a small rejection streak I get a phone number without asking for it. It was quite a shock and I thought that my luck must have changed!\n\nI promised to call and did so but sadly did not go out the following week since I was out of town. Fast forward to last night, I sent an SMS to confirm with her if she wanted to go out today; got a reply saying that she's in a new relationship and doesn't know what to do.\n\nTotally understandable that some people might lead another the wrong way for a number of different reasons:\n- unhappy relationship\n- feels exciting\n- wants to be the center of attention\n- plain drunkenness? why-not-what-the-heck-he-seems-nice?\n\nUnder what circumstances do you normally give out phone numbers? (This is research so I can see what type of people to avoid calling and getting hurt again.)", "summary": "I got hurt while trying to rescue baby seals from being eating by baby polar bears whilst on my extremist stint with Green Peace. It really hurts a bit inside... ;_;"}
{"id": "t3_u9ypj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I think I'm the victim of possible insurance fraud and identity theft", "post": "a few months ago, i got a letter in the mail from an insurance company saying that i was in an auto accident in a nearby city, which was false. the letter was addressed to a made up first name with the same first initial, and my last name (and obviously to my exact address). i emailed the agent at the insurance company, and cc'd the insurance fraud division in my state. the fraud division never replied to this or any further emails.\n\ni eventually heard back from the insurance agent, and she asked for me to scan and email back the letters that SHE had sent me (!). then the DMV sends me a letter saying that my license was about to be suspended because i was not responding to this accident report. well, not me exactly, but the fake me. i replied to the agent with the info, and shortly after, she replied with this:\n\n> Hello,\nThank you for sending copies of the letters sent to you.  We have checked our file and these letters were intended for a XYZ who was a driver involved in an accident with our insured.  He provided this address (the ones on the letter) to our policy holder at the time of the accident.  You may disregard these letters and we will update our claim file to reflect the address we have is incorrect.\nShould you have any other questions, please contact us at the number below.\n\ni then replied to the dmv and sent them the whole stack of correspondence, saying they had the wrong person, and i was suspecting possible identity / insurance fraud. the dmv sent back a letter in typical bureaucratic fashion, saying they would check their records to make sure they had the right info, and they would contact the other party, and mentioned nothing about the fraud or identity theft. shortly after, they sent another letter saying the party didn't respond, so this thing was off \"my\" record... for now.\n\nhere comes the good part: i get a letter from the dmv saying \"my\" vehicle was not registered, and it included the offending car's license plate, and the DRIVER'S LICENSE NUMBER. i was able to look up the plate, after discovering the smog check lookup in this [thread](\n\nso, what's is going on here??", "summary": "got a false accident charge to my address and a fake name similar to mine, string of emails leads to dismissal, but now i have the car and license info of this \"fake me\""}
{"id": "t3_4y0y7h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with [24M] I've been seeing for a few months. Suddenly seems to be slow fading me - what do I do?", "post": "I met this guy on a dating app \u2013 we've been seeing each other 1-2 times a week for the past two and a half months. He's pretty phenomenal. We have a ton in common and get along really well. When we see each other we typically go on fun/unique dates and started having sex regularly about a month into hanging out. We haven't had any sort of discussion about our relationship yet. My personal take on our relationship is that it's casual but consistent. I'm definitely developing feelings for him and could potentially see it turning into something more serious down the line (but I would be fine with it staying casual). \n\nThings all changed two weeks ago. I had met his friends on numerous occasions at this point so I figured it wouldn't be weird if he met some of my friends. I was going to be hanging out with two of my friends (a couple) so I invited him along. The entire evening was awkward. I'm not sure what even made it awkward, but the dynamic and everything was just off. And since then we've barely spoken and I've only seen him once. I've been initiating all the conversations and asked him to hang out numerous times. He took me to dinner last week at my own suggestion (a week after the friend date disaster) and it was lovely/normal. Afterwards he invited me back to his place but he was tired and didn't want to have sex so I left shortly after. He's initiated conversation with me twice since then but doesn't respond to my replies when I do answer and hasn't made any sort of effort to see me.\n\nI'm guessing that he's slow fading me. But I'm really confused as to why. Everything was going so well for two months, and suddenly things changed completely. I don't want to continue to text him or ask him to hangout again. However, is it okay to call him out on the slow fade thing and ask him what's up? I wouldn't be bothered if we hadn't been seeing each other for over two months at this point. I'm not sure if I should try to address it or just let it go? I'm confused and getting a bit angry at the situation.", "summary": "Guy I've been seeing for 2+ months suddenly seems disinterested and I'm not sure if I should address it or let it go."}
{"id": "t3_1vjinm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(23, F) having recurring nightmares about punching/beating up my boyfriend (25, M), no throwaway because he knows already.", "post": "Last night I had another in a series of bizarre dreams that I've had scattered pretty evenly time wise accross our 8 months of both dating and knowing each other (we met online and hit it off immediately). Last nights was particularly rattling, and like the others was very realistic and I ended up making swings at my boyfriend's face. It's so weird because there's no difference in how I feel when I go to sleep as to when these dreams happen. I had one once after I was a little annoyed at him, and last night's, the worst one, was after we had an amazing time in the city seeing a concert and I went to sleep happy. \n\nWe are overall completely fine, he's really busy with his job which is annoying but I don't care because he's doing what he loves and making money, but overall we really have no clash of values, rarely argue (not out of suppression of any problems but because we really don't have any), and everything's overall hunky dory. \n\nWhat could possibly be the issue? I love him n stuff", "summary": "keep dreaming about punching my wonderful boyfriend in the face about stupid shit that doesn't even make sense and think it's stupid."}
{"id": "t3_4ag1ji", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [46 M] hermit with [35 F] girlfriend? friend? I don't know.", "post": "Short version.  I'm 46 years old with emphasis on OLD.  Many miles on the engine.  Bad joints, bad hip, fat, and at best average looks.  I have a stable job but I've been single since my last relationship ended in 1995.  \n\nFor reasons that are not clear to me I seem to have attracted the attention of a far younger, fitter, better looking etc. woman who has a stable career of her own and zero reason to be interested in me romantically.  But given how isolated I've been for the past two decades, it may be she just sees me as a friend and this is all in my head.  So I need to figure out what the heck is going on here.  If it's just friendship, I can rest easy.  Otherwise it's off to Belize on a fake passport. Facts:\n\n--She has asked me over to her place maybe half a dozen times, but has never been romantic with me.\n--More recently while sitting in my truck cab she leaned in for what I swear was a kiss, which I dodged and turned into a cheek hug.\n--She's since asked me out to lunch and requested I ask her next time (not sure what that's about)\n--She pm's me on facebook several times a day and has talked about very personal things with me.\n--Most recently we did a drive out to an event and she hugged after and later PM'ed me saying she had a fantastic time and loved hanging out with me.  \n\nSo what is this?  Is this just how younger people are now?  How will I know if something more is happening here?  She is WAY too good for the likes of me.  And I'm way too old.  So I just don't see how romance would ever function here.  I mean literally I don't see how it could work. It would be like me being selected for an ascent team on K2.  A great honor, but also patently insane. I'd know going in that the team would just end up having to carry me back down and probably get hurt in the process.", "summary": "Old man 20 years single confronted by possible relationship, panics and wonders if he needs to flee country and/or planet."}
{"id": "t3_41wu5c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[28m] tried to secretly get a vasectomy without telling my wife [29f] and now she's very upset.", "post": "We've been together for six years, married for about eight months. We have switched between different forms of birth control (condoms, she's usually on the pill, etc.) throughout our relationship. I wanted to get a vasectomy because we've been together for some time and very luckily never gotten pregnant (there've been some close false calls but nothing like her having to get an abortion or anything). We have both been DINKS (double income no kids) and both staunchly believe in a child-free life. We have explicitly talked about this over the years and have always been on the same page. She found out and now is very upset with me, four days ago, and barely responds to me. I had to cancel the appointment and am in a sort of limbo I guess. I don't want to do anything until I sort this out as if I do it now, while she's angry, she'll feel more hurt and angry.\n\nOf course I asked her what difference does it make, we're both child free, etc. She said it's still a joint decision regardless, we use birth control now, there's no need, why are you changing things, you don't trust me? etc. Okay fair enough, so I apologized. Can we talk about it now? She said she was still angry and put me off.\n\nSo how should I approach this? I have apologized since and bought her a gift but it's a no go. I know some of you might think she obviously wants kids but I doubt that's the case at all, we've been on the same page since literally we've met. Think I've just screwed up majorly. Advice? We're heading into the weekend again and this is one of the longest fight we've had.", "summary": "tried to get my tubes tied, wife doesn't like that I tried to do it without her permission or consultation. Want to reconcile and talk about it but she's not having it. "}
{"id": "t3_4r0hmg", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(Colorado) Moving out at 16? Emancipation?", "post": "So, a bit of backstory behind this post. I have mental health issues (I've been diagnosed by my doctor, seen 2 psychiatrists and 2 therapists trying to get help) and due to my mom being a complete control freak I've never been able to get the help I need. What I see is the issue behing my depression is my family, and my mom never let me go to my therapy sessions alone, so I could never safely discuss what I think is the problem. Every day at home I'm miserable, not because I'm \"a moody teenager\", but because living here is completely unbearable. My dad is an alcoholic, my parents blame me for everything, including things I obviously didn't do, mainly things my older brother did. He has always been their favorite, he gets special treatment while I get treated like I'm basically worthless.  \n  \nBack to the main point, I need to get out. I have a job (~$1000/month and my boss said I'm getting a raise as soon as he can get me one), I also have some money saved up from my job/lawn mowing in the past, I have a car that I bought with my own money, so i have transportation, but my parents are signed as the owners on the title because the DMV wouldn't let me sign as the owner (iirc they said I was too young) so I could see that possibly being a problem. I have good grades in school, I'm responsible, never drink or do drugs, and I just need to get out of here with my sanity intact and without me ending up worse than I am. All I want is to be able to hold my current job and attend the same school as I am currently, so I don't know what the options are for staying in the same area (Is there something like foster care I could go into? I don't know much about this stuff) I don't think I would be able to afford an apartment on my own unless I found one for really cheap (could there be issues getting an apartment due to no credit and being under 18?)", "summary": "I need to get out, have a job, have a car, I don't know where to go from here.  "}
{"id": "t3_fhbtp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit boys, please help me find vday present for my awesome gamer supernerd bf?", "post": "My boyfriend is AWESOME so I want to get him something awesome for Valentine's Day :)  His life basically revolves around cameras, his RSS feed, Netflix, Starcraft & various other PC games and his computer (which he loves more than life itself).  I'm sort of a girly-girl (though I browse reddit daily and have been known to play the occasional round of COD), so my expertise is more in the looking-cute-in-pictures, throwing parties, and pop culture sphere than in the technorati realm.  He's not much for material possessions and he much prefers to stay in than go out.  We're college students, so plane tickets to Tahiti are out of the question (I probably couldn't drag him along if I tried, actually...), but I've got a pretty comfy budget so I'm not exceedingly worried about breaking the bank.  He's such a wonderful guy that I'd really like to get him something nice! \n\nBoys of Reddit, I need your help.  All of my other boyfriends have been athlete, east-coast prep school alums, fratstars or some combination of those.  Not that there's anything wrong with that, but my current boyfriend's quite a departure from that whole scene.  They were pretty easy to shop for, but that's easy to give up for a brilliant, thoughtful guy (who the others most certainly were not).  My friends have been ZERO help, so I'd really appreciate any suggestions you might have!", "summary": "REDDIT BOYS,PLEASE HELP ME FIND A VALENTINE'S DAY PRESENT FOR MY TECHY BF :)"}
{"id": "t3_2szuhx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [38 M] just started dating a great girl [29 F] three weeks ago. She wants to take slow, but I'm a sex addict.", "post": "Please don't bust my balls over this, I'm looking for some serious advice and help coping with some sexual addiction issues I'm having.\n\nI met a great girl a few weeks ago and things are going really well. We talk every day and we've been out several times. She's everything I've been hoping for and, for the first time in a long time, I can see myself falling in love with someone. \n\nShe wants to take things slow, so while there's been lots of kissing, there's been no sex. It could be a few weeks or a month before that's on the table. We haven't talked about being exclusive, but I can't pretend that my relationship with this new girl isn't special. She's more or less my girlfriend at this point and I love everything about that. \n\nMy problem is waiting. I recently came to the realization that I have some serious sexual addiction issues. It's ruined relationships for me in the past and I've made more bad choices than I'd care to admit. I've been single for a long time and naturally I love sex, so I have several FWB's and casual hook ups. \n\nI'm having some serious urges to hook up a little something on the side before things get more serious with the new girl. I'm making excuses to myself (it wouldn't mean anything, it's just a quick release) and talking to people I probably shouldn't be.\n\nI need to stay focused on what could be a very good, long term investment and not give in to short term fun... but it's not easy. I would appreciate serious advice from people that have been in similar situations.", "summary": "I'm falling for this girl, but she wants to wait before having sex. Are we still considered exclusive or would it be ok to fool around?"}
{"id": "t3_39j8lj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M]with girlfriend [17F] of a month, I hurt her feelings and have now split, but I want to reconcile", "post": "Be sure to explain in detail with line breaks.\nSo me and my girlfriend (If you can call it that) have been going out for a month now, but I was somewhat uncertain about me feelings for her. \n\nSo there came a day when she called for a talk (Friday) and here I tried to express my true feelings about not being too sure, so then we left it at that and a few days. I was pretty down because of the pain I caused her. She asked if I was okay but I sort of brushed it off while feeling down. I was out of character, and many people realized how I was. (Its really hard to bring yourself up, any advice to cope)\n\nFast forward to Monday, we have a brief exchange of returning her belongings, and the following day we spoke. She said she was hurt and even more so about the fact I never tried to contact her, and it appeared to her that she did not mean much to me, which is quite the opposite. This day (Tuesday) we were talking to each other for a few hours, but most of it was like our regular banter talking about random stuff like it was sort of normal. Towards the end, we went back into business and she said she was willing to see how this went through since she didn't know how much she liked me. Day ended, texts were a little out of character. \n\nWednesday, nothing much really happened, texts here and there. She was busy and I wanted to talk to her. In the end, I told her I would be there for her even if things did not work out. She said she didn't want to lose a friend over this, and also stated it would take a while to actually forgive me. Then we went into somewhat friendly banter and end of day.\n\nThrough this duration, I have been feeling like poop, and this is a new feeling for me (First semi-relationship if you will). I would like to try and reconcile with her but is it worth trying or not? Have I gone too far?", "summary": "Dating a girl for a month, unsure feelings lead to upset girlfriend and now split. But I would like to try and reconcile if that is a possible option. "}
{"id": "t3_3bx5ou", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] miss my boyfriend [17M] and feel guilty about it", "post": "The title is confusing and I apologize, but basically here is my situation. My bf is going into his senior year of high school, and he has 1001 things to do. He has loads of summer homework, he's building an art portfolio for college and he's started to work on his senior project. I'm also busy, volunteering at an organization for my resume and working as a private lesson teacher. \n\nBetween the two of us, we have very little time to ourselves. That being said, we also want time to spend with friends, family, and us. Which all in all leaves little time for us. I'm not mad, I understand that we both have super important things to do. I just miss him a lot and I feel bad. \n\nWe schedule time for us days in advance, one of those days being this past Tuesday. He had to cut the day a little short because his band needed to rehearse, and that was fine with me; it's work and it's part of his senior project. However, I still got irrationally sad and I cried over it. \n\nI'm upset that we will see each other less often, and I feel guilty about it. I'm not jealous and I don't want to be seen as a spoiled girlfriend who demands all of his time. I fully understand that we both have a lot on our plate and that it's for the better of our futures. I guess I'm really looking for advice on how to cope with my sadness. He gets upset that I'm upset, and I know that I shouldn't be because we'll still see each other occasionally.", "summary": "Bf and I are super busy, leaving little time for us. I get sad, bf feels bad, and in turn I feel guilty. Help me not get so sad?"}
{"id": "t3_v2kar", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend lied to me.. not sure what to do", "post": "Hi Reddit. \nMe (M 23)\nHer (F 19)\nBeen together for about 6 months.\n\nI'll cut straight to the chase. Yesterday I dropped my girlfriend at the train station so she could go to Melbourne to do some shopping. I received a text message from her a few hours later that she was on the train home and that her aunty would be picking her up and she would be staying at her cousins house as she had had a fight with her mum and didn't want to go home. She said she was in bed and was going to sleep. I said that was fine. This morning, I found that my phone deleted most of my contacts during the night, including my girlfriends number. I messaged her cousin this morning and told her to tell my girlfriend to message me when she woke up. I then found out that my girlfriend wasn't there, and didn't stay there the night at all. \n\nI messaged my girlfriend asking what the fuck was going on and where she really stayed. She then told me that she stayed at another cousins house in Melbourne since her mum had told her to find somewhere else to live and that she didn't want me to worry about it. (I should add that her ex lives in Melbourne, who she still talks to and has a kid with).\n\nI don't trust her, and I have no way of knowing whether she's telling the truth or not. She's lied to me before. Should I get out now? If she really has been kicked out of home, I hate the thought of adding to her troubles by leaving her. I've never broken up with someone, and I hate the thought of hurting someone.", "summary": "Girlfriend lies a lot, and last night lied to me about where she was staying. Don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1f7khz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (21/f) am conflicted by whether relationship (4 years, 22/m) has lost its spark, and I don't know how to deal with it.", "post": "My boyfriend (22) and I have been dating for 4 years as of yesterday, and I've been getting commitment jitters since around the time I moved back home from university. We've been long-distance for the bulk of the time we've been together. Now that I'm home I'm all confused about my future, my career (or lack thereof), and really feeling doubtful about our relationship. I've tried talking to him about it, but he feels that we're doing really great, and we agreed that we'll figure out the forks when we get there (in terms of career vs. relationship). He is the most amazing person, and I love him so much. I've daydreamed of us living together and having a family, and have justified my doubtful feelings by saying I wish that we met later in our lives. Last night though, I had a dream that we broke up mutually, and it felt oddly satisfying. I know this is just a dream, and it's stupid to base anything off your dreams. I just want to say that I am a very paranoid person, and have minor minor minor destructive tendencies (a major example is that in a zombie apoc, if chased, I would probably just stop and have myself killed because from the stress of being chased). So it could be me just slowly deteriorating one of the greatest things/people to have come into my life. I don't know what to do, I love him so much, and can't stand being without him. At the same time, how do you know when we've reached the expiry date? I hope I'm not in denial, because I really want to make this work.", "summary": "Am I confused about my future, and taking it out on my relationship, or has an expiry date been reached and I am in denial?"}
{"id": "t3_1p2lng", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26/m] want to travel alone a few times in my life and my [26/f] fiancee gets really upset at the idea.", "post": "I'm not quite sure what to do here. One of my big goals in life is to travel to some more exotic places by myself. However, when I told this to my fiancee she reacted very harshly. She pretty much took it as I wanted to leave her behind.\n\nIt isnt that I don't love taking vacations with her, its just that I have a huge problem with putting everyone else's needs before my own. I have been on multiple vacations where after a week, we come to realize that I have bought something for everyone but haven't done anything for myself. I also run into guilt issues where if we are doing something that I wanted to do and she maybe wasn't the most thrilled about it, that I have trouble enjoying the activity and end up just cutting it short so we can leave. \n\nSo one of my life goals was just to travel places on my own, not for a long time, a week or two at most, and just wake up in the morning and pick a direction and just go, not have to worry about what anyone else wants to do or thinks about, just be me!\n\nI have tried having more and more conversations about this and she tried suggesting going someplace together and just taking a day to go off on my own, but she seemed really upset when I told her it wasn't the same. \n\nAny ideas why she is so agaisnt this? I know she is being good with trying to come up with a solution but in our relationship I have sacrificed what I want over and over again and I feel like on this issue I have to make a stand, it is a life dream of mine.", "summary": "Fiancee hates the idea of me travelling alone, I don't want to compromise on the issue, more looking for an outside observation than direct advice."}
{"id": "t3_14bpbp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO (M26) told me (F33) last night while have sexy times that \"I needed to hurry up, because of our new puppy\".. I am at my wits end with this dog! How do we get back on track?!?!?", "post": "So I got my SO a surprise X-Mas puppy for Christmas. All he has talked about since I met him was how bad he wanted a puppy.. Every day I heard it. So I bought him one a few weeks ago. His ex took his puppy over 1.5 years ago when they split. Since we got the puppy, all he worries about is the puppy. I try and train him, and if the puppy makes a noise, he thinks I am hurting him. He completely spoils the dog and lets him getaway with everything. He is always exhausted/grumpy (even though I get up with him every morning), never wants to do anything since we got the puppy and we use to have sex few times a day, and now I am lucky if it's that in a week. I am so exhausted. I do everything I can as this is all he wanted and talked about, but all he worries about now is the dog. Than last night, we planned on having sexy times all day, and when it came down to it, (dog was in crate), he told me TO HURRY UP!!! Seriously?!?! Reddit please help me.", "summary": "Ever since we got a new puppy, I feel like we have a child. I am struggling so bad to maintain the amazing relationship we use to have. Please help!"}
{"id": "t3_1q9gwj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Guys: what makes a girl \"approachable?\"", "post": "I (22f) been single for about two months now after a horrible end to a near five year relationship. Although I'm not at all ready to really date anyone, I'm finding that I'm barely even being approached when I go to bars.\n\nMany male friends I've spoken to say I'm not very \"approachable.\" They say I'm very attractive but not in an approachable way, and that I often look difficult to talk to or hit on. Independently they add in different descriptors, like \"confident,\" \"intelligent,\" \"complex,\" and \"intimidating.\"\n\nAre they trying to politely say I look like a bitch? (serious)", "summary": "What makes a girl seem approachable or not and is there anything I can actively do to make men more likely to talk to me?"}
{"id": "t3_1hs3t7", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Asshole owes me over a grand...", "post": "During the summer of '11 I lent a friend in a halfway house a few hundred dollars to be able to stay there. He kept asking for more money, saying that it was for the house, and I kept dishing it out. When I added it all up, he owed me about $1200 which he said he would pay back. I, being foolish, believed this. I'm not sure where the money went... he could have honestly been telling the truth. \n\nThe next thing I know, the guy moves to South Carolina! (I'm in Pennsylvania.) He wouldn't answer my calls or texts, so I told my parents. I had this guy sign a piece of paper saying how much he owed me and that he will pay it back. With this, my parents called their lawyer and there was nothing they could do about it because it isn't enough to have a silly piece of paper. \n\nFast forward 2 years of fighting the urge to tear him a new asshole, I finally confronted him via Facebook, and he apologized and said we needed to talk. I told him I just want my money and to be done with it, but he's insisting we need to speak first or \"nothing will ever get done about it,\" so I told him I'd call tomorrow.\n\nNow, I know this was incredibly stupid and, believe me, I've learned my lesson. I don't need to be reminded of my dumbassery, but I have no clue what to do. I'm obviously going to call him, but I have a feeling he has some sob story waiting for me and I don't want to hear it... I just want my damn money! I also don't know if he's gonna wanna meet up or something, and if he does, I don't know if it will be safe for me or anyone for that matter. This is a shady kid and I was just trying to help him out.\n\nPlease help Reddit!!", "summary": "Lent money out incrementally to a friend and it's been 2 years without him paying me back... Also, not sure if he's dangerous or trying to get another one over on me."}
{"id": "t3_206pp0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] Don't know if I should break up with her", "post": "Hi everyone, thank you in advance for any advice you can give me! \n\nMy girlfriend and I are almost done with our sophomore year in college. We have been dating for 1 1/2 years since we started college.  She is my first for everything including kissing.  I think she is a great person and I do love her but I just don't know what to think.\n\nWe talk about the future and we have many similarities in what we want in our future but I am having doubts about our relationship.  My biggest thing is that I have not dated or done anything with any other girl. I feel like even though I love her, I need a break to experience college, both by myself and with other people. I am always thinking about other girls and I don't know if I'm ready to commit for life without testing the waters.  It's just so hard to give up something very good that we've had for over a year.  \n\nLife after college with her could be both what I want and don't want.  I have some things that make me feel insecure about our relationship after college and I don't want to make this too long but it pretty much involves her mother and my job which I get to choose if I want to move around a lot or stay in one spot.  I can explain further if anyone wants.\n\nThanks again!", "summary": "My girlfriend and I have been dating a while now.  She's the only one I've ever had.  Do I stay with her or experience new people/things."}
{"id": "t3_4hd7wi", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Might be 16 but I still need a babysitter (16/M/5'11\" SW: 181 CW: 175 GW: 155)", "post": "First post- Check \u2714\nClickbait title- Check \u2714\n\nNewish (about half a month) lurker. Have been overweight all my life. I know my stats may seem okay but I have a lot of excess fat and my eating and activity habits are terrible. I lost almost 15kg (30lbs) about 2 years back but it came back and then some. This, constant weight loss yo-yo-ing and unhealthy eating+ no exercise have caused me to have a lot of stretch marks and not have a lot of confidence.\n\nBut I'm losing weight again and this time it's staying off. My brother and cousin, who both live with me at my parents house in Australia are quite fit and we're looking forward to attempting a 13 day Everest base camp hike in January of next year. This is my main motivation right now as well as looking good for graduation in November/university next year. \n\nI've been at it for two weeks now and I've lost about 5 lbs by doing 3 morning runs a week and 4 sessions at the gym as well as keeping to MFP goals even though I was very slack with it starting up ( \n\nWell anyways I wrote this basically to keep myself accountable. I'm not sure anyone will read this and tbh I don't mind if no one does.\n\nThanks to r/loseit for all the motivation it gave me and has given others. Keep losing people! :)", "summary": "I'm overweight and I don't want to be. This is my first post to make sure that I remember this on the hardest days."}
{"id": "t3_tzdjz", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I'm unsure if shes sending signals or if I'm just reading everything wrong.", "post": "I'm a 19 year old male and she is a 19 year old female. So heres my issue, we meet a couple of months ago, maybe November and we hit it off as friends. I took some time to get to know her and I decided that I liked her and asked her out and we went out, had a great time and that was that. Shortly after, she told me that she wasn't really into me, I was a little disheartened but I respected it and I respected her for telling me. \n\nWe agreed to stay friends and since then we've continued to hangout and enjoy each others company, but I haven't been able to shake the feeling that now shes become interested and perhaps not saying anything. She's pretty shy and if she is interested, I'm not sure how she would feel about telling me, given that she's already rejected me.\n\nOn the other hand, I'm not sure if I'm just misreading everything. I'm happy with the way things are, but I would certainly agree to go out with her. Should I ask her out? I'm worried that if I've got this all wrong that she'll just cut off our friendship. I'm really confused on what to do.", "summary": "I'm a guy, shes a girl. We went out. She wasn't into me and we stayed friends. I think she likes me, but she doesn't want to say anything. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_43mz5r", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU drinking moldy coffee and throwing up", "post": "Happened at ~5am yesterday. Sorry for my englando, I am no loco.\n\nSo Sainsbury has the \"Starbucks Caffe Latte\" on sale, and during the past week I decided to buy two of these bad boys. I drank the first one on Monday, and bought the second one on Saturday evening, popped it open at 5am Sunday. I finished it, forgot about finishing it and saw that I had forgotten to throw out the one from Monday. It was half full, and that's why I thought that it was the newer one. I took the largest sip of coffee in my life, swallowed it for some reason and insta-puked on my keyboard and pants. \n\nImagine old sour milk, kept in a warm environment, week old, mixed with some instant coffee and added suggar, with some dark mold on top. Put a straw in that bitch. Sip it. Swallow it. \n\nTried running to the toilet, but the lizard escaped for the 2nd time, all over the corridor carpet.\n\nI live in a dorm with 4 chicks and 3 guys. The girls are clean freaks, one of them is vegan, others are weird like that as well. My puke has the weirdest, most disgusting smell you can ever imagine, and it's stanking up the whole corridor. After spraying the whole area with some random fabreeze-like shit, for some reason I can smell it even in the kitchen area, which is literally on the other side of the building. \n\nNot happy about the ruined pants, acid filled keyboard and the smell, but I expect that this will trigger some vegans in the house, so moral of the story: there's maybe always an upside in many situations.\nBut then again I'm reading all these stories about mold related deaths and thinking I might be dead soon.", "summary": "Drank moldy week old ice coffee, puked on keyboard, pants, corridor. Corridor stank up, vegan clean freaks getting triggered as we speak. Maybe terminal illness incoming."}
{"id": "t3_2dhij0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [ 29/F] with my husband [32/M] 6 years together 9, he wants to donate his sperm to a lesbian couple.", "post": "My husband has been friends with a woman for a very long time. She is a lesbian. We will call her Gwen. I have met Gwen and her current partner, Kelly. They've been together about 5 years now and they're very nice people. I wonder about Kelly's motives with my husband sometimes. She is sort of touchy with him and Gwen is her first lesbian relationship. But we only see them less than once a year since we live very far away from each other now. \n\nNow here's the problem. Apparently, before he met me, Gwen and he would talk about how he would donate sperm if she ever wanted to have a baby with her partner. So I guess she and Kelly want to have a baby and have brought up this idea of using my husbands sperm. He says it's an honor that they would deem his DNA as good enough for their child. The problem is I am totally against it. I don't want my husband to have another child (we have one, and one more on the way) with another woman. I really think this is a deal breaker for me. \n\nAm I being unrealistic? Is this a perfectly normal thing for them to ask? Should I be okay with this? I'll answer any questions if I haven't been clear enough in my description.", "summary": "My husband thinks it's flattering that his lesbian friends want to use his sperm to make a baby. He's willing to do it. I don't want to share."}
{"id": "t3_4jr1rg", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Overweight in LC and want to dump $20K+ cash into taxable account for long term growth - advice?", "post": "Looking for advice on what fund(s) or ETF(s) I should look to for investing \"excess\" cash. I'm 32 years old making about $150K/year. I have no 401K and max out my IRA ($90K currently), hence the taxable account. This money is going to be held long term, and I plan to continue contributing $1K/mo for as long as my income remains at this level.\n\nMost advice seems to be to stick cash into an index fund or total market fund, which I'm considering (IVV or FSTMX probably, as I'm with Fidelity). However, I'm quite overweight in Large Cap already (through my Roth and also select stock purchases in my taxable account already - lots of tech).\n\nMight I be better served to split the money between Intl and/or Small/Mid Cap ETFs like IJT/IJH, etc.? \n\nAny thoughts greatly appreciated, thanks!", "summary": "32 yo with maxed Roth, emergency fund etc. (no 401k). Looking for best options on where to invest cash in taxable account with a portfolio already overweight in Large Cap."}
{"id": "t3_1o4ef6", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I wanted to jab my x-acto knife into his arm while he was sleeping.", "post": "I am a male. \nOne of my best friends was over and he was spending the night. He was using my computer earlier in the night to go on facebook and he fell asleep with his account still open.---\n\nRecently I had a hard breakup with someone that meant everything to me. She was very conflicted about ending things and always stayed vague and nebulous about her reasons. The most solid reason she said she couldn't be with me was because of our difference in faith, or rather my lack of faith in contrast to her faith. That I would bring her down in her faith and draw her away from God. I supported her completely in whatever she believed and I made a point not to pester her about it or make any objection/arguments against her faith. Anyway, there always seemed to be something in the way of her expressing her feelings for me completely.\n\n---back to me having access to my friends facebook account... I was curious and I looked at some of the messages between my friend and my ex-girlfriend. I searched the whole of 12,000 messages between them for my name and it turns out that I was a common conversation topic between the two of them. Specifically, my friend telling her that I was wrong for her and that my feelings for her were not authentic. He also made a point to tell her whenever she mentioned her feelings for me that she didn't have any real feelings for me and that she should brush them off and try to create a distance between herself and I.\n\nI did all of this while he was sleeping not a few feet away from me in my bed. I didn't fall asleep until 8 something AM and I haven't mentioned it to him at all yet. \n\nIt was dishonest for me to go snooping at that level but it was relieving in a way to understand what was causing her strange behavior and vague tones. I have no idea what to do.", "summary": "while I was snooping through my best friends facebook messages with my ex-girlfriend/sweetheart I found out that him talking shit about me and manipulating her feelings for me was the main reason she broke up with me."}
{"id": "t3_hkcqi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm looking for some creative ideas for some good ol' fashioned epic mother FUCKING REVENGE!", "post": "Looking for some creative revenge ideas, the more epic the better.  \n\n**Back story**:  I live and work in South Korea.  Due to ridiculous cellphone texting capabilities, anyone in Korea is able to send text messages under the guise of someone else and have it show up as that other person (i.e.: you send a text to your boss from someone else's phone saying you quit.... internal corporate shit-storm ensues.... you get the idea.)  Someone somewhere thought that this was a good option to have on all Korean cellphones in the country.  \n\n***The REAL story***:  This past Sunday morning finds me waking up to a text message from a cute girl at work I am currently seeing.  It reads: \"im sorry, but i think you should get tested for herpes.  ive got it.\"  The next few minutes sorta pass by in a haze as I frantically search the internet for clinics, hospitals and centers that will be able to test me (btw, hard to find an open clinic on a Sunday in Korea.)    \n\nEventually I calm down, take a hot shower, and sort of reevaluate my life with my new \"herpy derp.\"  I decide to text the cute girl who sent me the message.  Maybe she can shed some light.  I write:  \"thnx for the info.  where can I get checked out?\"  Not five minutes pass when she responds with \"???\".  Reddit, I've never been more happy to see three question marks in my life.\n\nNow I call the cute girl, we talk for a few minutes about how she didn't send it to me, and my brain realizes you can send fake text messages.  I immediately suspect a fat bitch at work.  In fact we both suspect fat bitch as our number one suspect.  Today is Thursday (in South Korea) and we just got back from the SK office and we have proof undeniable that it was the fat bitch.  \n\nSo reddit, I ask for creative ways to seek my revenge.  I'm also asking on the part of cute girl, so two part-players in this revenge story would be even more sweet.", "summary": "got a fake text saying I had herpes, discovered it was fake and, found out who sent it... seeking REVENGE!"}
{"id": "t3_vhl7a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "For those of you that are/have been in a long distance relationship: how much time do you spend talking/chatting? [crosspost from r/askreddit]", "post": "What are your experiences in long-distance relationships? Do you communicate every day? How many hours do you typically communicate each day?\n\nMy gf and I regularly argue about this. Basically, she always complains that we don't spend enough time on the phone/chat, while I always complain that it's too much. We normally talk about 5-10 hours over phone and another 5-15 hours on chat each week, which comes down to 1.5-3.5 hours each day. I have a regular work day (8-10 hours), and often my only after-work activity is communicating with my gf. I love talking to her, but honestly, often I would prefer doing other things instead (watching movies with friends, reading, doing sports,\u2026).", "summary": "Gf often is pissed at me if I just want to talk 30 or 60 minutes per day with her. Is this normal?"}
{"id": "t3_swrd5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is he actually interested?", "post": "I'm 21/f and I met a 22/m about 2 months ago. We didn't really start talking until a month ago. He would text me almost every weekend asking to hang out, but I was always busy.\n\nFinally I agree, and we go to a movie, but I'm 99% sure that was just as friends. We bought our tickets separately and met inside the theater. Nothing happened there.\n\nWell, after that, we started texting/chatting online a lot. We had a lot of interesting conversations and he kept mentioning that I was really nice and that I gave good advice. Somehow we got on the topic of sex one day and since then, things kind of got stuck there? We ended up sexting a few times.\n\nHe tends to flirt with anything with breasts, so I was weary of his flirting. But at one point i asked him why he had to go after so many women. That one is enough. He responded saying if one were to take him, that would be enough. I told him that shouldn't be hard to find, and he simply replied with \"Who? You?\". I said I couldn't answer that, and he didn't pursue much further. Then we just ended up sexting..\n\nI don't know if I'm assuming things because of the sexting or if it's valid to think he might be interested in more than just \"sexting buddies\" (if that's a thing.. I don't know). I've never done that before so I don't know the procedure.\n\nLike I said, he is the kind of guy that flirts with anything with breasts, but when talking to him privately, I've kind of figured that it's all kind of a muse to hide insecurities. I just don't know if he's doing this with me because I'm a female and willing, or if he actually likes me and wants more than that.. I'm not the most attractive person, so I can only assume he's actually genuine and not in it just to get in my pants, because no one wants that.. not in 3 years.", "summary": "I don't know if the guy I've been sexting is actually interested in me or just a horny guy looking for nothing other than a sexting buddy"}
{"id": "t3_2jyy0h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 22 M with my long distance girlfriend 20 F duration, short-description. How can I help with her depression from far away?", "post": "I dated this girl for several months when I studied abroad. It was fantastic. Unfortunately my time abroad had a expiration date and we broke up just before I left. After trying to drastically limit our communication for several post break-up months, we finally admitted that we still very much had feelings for each other.\n\nThe first couple months of the long distance relationship went amazingly smoothly, but eventually I felt her start to draw away. We would talk and the responses would be more curt, and where we used to waste hours just incessantly texting back and forth, we eventually settled in to a likely more healthy, but slower pattern of communication. She also took to tweeting extremely cryptic things, while for the most part putting on a happy face during our communications.\n\nI deal with some insecurity and depression for which I'm supposed to be taking meds. And her changed behavior gave me some anxiety about the status of our relationship, especially because on facebook she maintained the same active social life, going out with her mostly male friends who had during my time abrouad made their dislike of me very obvious.\n\nHer distance and the tweets deviated enough from her normal behavior that I finally addressed it on Skype, and she eventually admitted that she had these intense feelings of depression and external pressure and was in therapy for her issues, but for the most part refused to elaborate beyond that. \n\nThis conversation happened maybe two months ago, and since then we've gone through different extremes, extremely close and upbeat to distant and withdrawn. I want to help and play a larger role than a supportive voice through her computer screen. I think she for the most part tunes out whatever affirming comments I give her. \n\nWe have days where things are incredible, but then she falls back into a depressive cycle and I feel like white noise against everything else. Are the strategies for reaching someone who can be closed off, especially considering that I can't be physcially there?", "summary": "Girlfriend is depressed. We are long distance and I can't be physically there but I want strategies for how to support her, when she seems to shut down my attempts"}
{"id": "t3_sz09b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend claims that her \"sexual nature\" is an excuse for letting her friend finger her. Full story inside.", "post": "18/M, in relationship for 1 year.\nMy girlfriend has a friend. Let's call him \"Tom.\" Tom (18/M) likes my girlfriend and dislikes me. Now, one day, I decide to buy my girlfriend, let's call her \"Meredith,\" her first vibrator. Meredith (18/F) is very sexually inexperienced with this stuff, is a virgin, hasn't came her entire life. But she IS into some things that are \"kinky.\" Mostly bondage where she claims the role of submissive. Tom was there when we bought the vibrator and decided to stay the night at her house. I was unaware of this but hey, Tom seems like a cool guy. Anyways, what transpired during that night is Tom groped Meredith and used the vibrator on her for around 6 minutes. This gave her her first orgasm.\n\nNow, I talked to Tom about this. He said she put up no resistance and seemed to enjoy it. She said she put up no resistance because it's her \"sexual nature\" to \"be submissive\" like that.\nShould this be a valid excuse?", "summary": "Girlfriend was kind of molested (and kind of cheated on me) but went with it, enjoyed it, came. All because she's \"submissive.\""}
{"id": "t3_2ofmrf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help! I may have have just lost my (20M) closest friend (19F)", "post": "So I was messaging my friend we will call Donna and things were going okay but then she started acting really strange saying how she didn't want us to be friends anymore and then she said she wanted us to be strictly platonic friends (we would often start making out when spending time together and we did go on one date but she decided earlier she wasn't ready for a committed relationship which I understood but we would still kiss and we almost had sex at least twice. But anyway, today I was messaging her and she started acting weird and said how she wanted to be strictly platonic and didn't want to kiss me at all anymore. So I said that was probably a good idea so our relationship doesn't get compromised or confusing plus my feelings had grown more platonic towards her anyway, because I didn't want her to think that she was forcing me into an uncomfortable situation and that I would be crushing on her and constantly trying to be her boyfriend. It was at this point that she informed me that her roommate had written the line about wanting to be strictly platonic and everything. She then agreed anyway that it would be good for us to stop making out. So the conversation continued for a little while but she kept bringing up the fact that I said I didn't have romantic feelings for her anymore despite having made out and cuddled with her last night and accusing me of not liking her for her and only the things she did for me. Things just escalated from there and now I'm really worried that she won't be my friend anymore etc.\n\nI was just hoping someone on here could give me some advice any thoughts really on this situation because I'm completely lost and in a very dark place as a result of possibly losing her.", "summary": "my FWB's roommate sent me a message as my FWB saying she wanted to only be friends, I agreed my FWB flipped out after agreeing with me."}
{"id": "t3_105onw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Trouble getting over a relationship (20/m), want her (19/f) back", "post": "My girlfriend and I of just over 7 months broke up last Friday at about 1:30 AM. It's been almost a week and I'm having a terribly hard time accepting and getting over it. She truly was the love of my life and she showed me show much love, kindness, and compassion that I never got out of any of my past relationships. I ended up leaving school for the weekend and going home. Which was good for me. I got away from everything that was bothering me, and I got to spend some time with some old high school friends that I haven't seen in a long time. Later on that night, she texts me. Just \"Hey\", but it kinda confused me. She was the one who called off the relationship. When I asked her why she did, she wasn't sure why she was feeling this way, but she said \"I don't think I want to be in a serious relationship right now\" Anyway, I don't text her back for about three hours because I was busy and didn't want to fall into a the depression I was trying to avoid. I later found out through a mutual friend that she was confused as to why I hadn't texted her back earlier. When I did text her back, we didn't talk about the break up or the relationship, just what I was doing at that time. Over that last few days I've really been struggling trying to keep it all together. All I can think about is getting her back, and I will do anything for that opportunity. I haven't been talking to her, kind of avoiding her, although it's hard at times since we are the same major and live in the same building. I truly love her and like I said, I would do anything to be back together with her. We made each other happy, and I know we can do it again.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I broke up, I can't stand it. Been keeping my distance and haven't been talking to her. Want to get back together with her because when we were together we made each other really happy."}
{"id": "t3_3jxa84", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25F] boyfriend [23M] has fallen out of love with me but he says he doesn't want to break up.", "post": "Me and my boyfriend have been going through a rough patch for a few months now and it has left me feeling insecure, unloved and him overwhelmed. He has put up an emotional wall between the both of us and I try to pull him closer and closer. He is withdrawing into his hobbies and he is always \"too busy\" for me. Deep down we both care for each other but I feel that we are emotionally incompatible for each other.\n\nSo a few days ago I asked my boyfriend of three years whether he loved me or not. His response was: I did before, I'm afraid I don't feel it now but I will probably realize that I do love you if we break up. He doesn't want to break up. \n\nSo, is this a cowards way of keeping me around for the comfort or does he just need time for the feeling to come back?", "summary": "Asked boyfriend whether he loves me. He told me he did at one point, doesn't anymore but might realize he does if I am gone."}
{"id": "t3_2n671c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (F22) break up with my LDR (23m) without crushing him?", "post": "Been together about 3 years. \n\nTo tell the truth I do love him; he's the sweetest most caring guy I've ever met, he's very good in bed. He cheers me up when I'm down. He's amazing. \n\nBUT, I can't handle the distance anymore, we only see each other every 5 months or more, and trying to handle 2 jobs as well as college and a long distance relationship is killing me... \n\nHe keeps trying to plan me moving where he is after I finish my education... and I just don't see it happening.... its tearing me apart?  \n\nAlso, I'm terrified of hurting him; I was basically his first real girlfriend, and he is (or at least acts and tells me) that he's madly in love with me and doesn't want to lose me.", "summary": "It's not him, it's the distance, and I don't want to hurt him. I love him. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_145n09", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "(36F) How do I break it off with a guy (40M) I have been seeing for a couple months without losing his friendship?", "post": "I have been dating/seeing this fellow for a couple of months. I was somewhat pursuing him, but have given up on him after the relationship hasn't progressed forward much. He is very private and seems to keep me separate from his life. I haven't pushed it, but started backing away when I noticed that I was pursuing him. A month ago, I met someone that I really like and would enjoy seeing him more. The relationship with the new guy isn't exclusive, but I just realized that I am done with the other guy. My question is: How do I break him off without losing our friendship? We were pretty good friends before we got involved (sexually) and he stated in the past that he likes to remain friends with ex's. I have barely talked to him in the past couple of weeks and haven't met up with him in person (my choice)....", "summary": "Been dating M for a couple months. Relationship hasn't advanced. I want to end the relationship, but still remain friends.  How do I break it off so that I can be friends?"}
{"id": "t3_2humfd", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Credit card company reinstating fraudulent charges on my account, what do I do?", "post": "A few months ago (May) I had 2 $100 charges made on my credit card account in another state. My credit card company contacted me letting me know of this and I quickly said this was not me and they issues me a new card. A few months later after the bank changed it's name to Synchrony bank, I get a letter in the mail saying the charge was made with a signature and therefore it was made by me or someone on my behalf. Therefore they were reinstating the charges. I quickly called back and they issued me a new card and said they would investigate the charge. Now I receive a letter saying nothing unusual was noted. There's still a $200 charge that's appearing on my statement. \n\nI have no idea what to do, or get it through their skulls that I did not make these purchases! It's infuriating and I refuse to pay this. IS there really nothing I can do? Is there an outside agency that works on this stuff? Any help would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Credit card company contacted me stating i had $200 of fraudulent charges, after removing charges they reversed their stance and reinstated the charges on my card. How do I get them removed once and for all?"}
{"id": "t3_p61gx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Parents Living Apart. Living with Mom but want independence. How to get out?", "post": "My dad got frustrated with my mom about her weight, fitness level and how she can be a bit of a pack rat so there is always extra things around and it is a challenge to keep the house presentable.\n\nAfter threatening to do it for over a year, my dad moved out and got his own house closer to his office.  This was about 6 or 7 months ago.  During the time since then, my parents have gone to marriage counselling, a couples group therapy thing for a few weeks and are currently in the middle of a relationship book. As far as I can tell my dad hasn't kissed or hugged or shown hardly any signs of affection for my mom during that time and it has taken its toll, she is fairly depressed and often doesn't get to bed until 3 or 4AM.\n\nThe house is rather large house with a decent sized lot where we keep cows and have a dog and cats and a barn with a tractor. My dad still comes by on a regular basis (mostly in the middle of the day, probably to avoid my Mom while she is at work) and takes care of the cows and some basic farm tasks, so there are no concerns about maintaining the farm currently.\n\nHere is where I come in. I am 22 and I fix computers for a living and can easily support myself and actually be pretty well off money wise. When he first moved out and my mother was really distraught, I was currently in the planning stages of finding my own place and moving out by the end of 2011. My mom asked me to not move out until this situation was resolved between them. I put my plans on hold, but he still doesn't show signs of wanting to move back in and I really want to move out. I really don't want to leave my mom alone, she likes having me around to help around the house and to have someone to talk to rather than coming home to an empty house.\n\nWhat advice can you give me to proceed from here? I am really very torn between wanting to move out and not wanting to leave my mom all alone.", "summary": "Dad moved out, mom has asked me to stay to keep company and help around the house but I want to move out to be more independent. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_125j51", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[18m] Girlfriend [18f] is constantly flirting with other guys.", "post": "So, my girlfriend and I have been going out for roughly three months now. Now, she's a flirty person by nature, but the extent to which she flirts with other guys when I'm around is, in my opinion, completely excessive. Sure, you have the friendly hugs with friends of hers, and that's perfectly fine with me. But then there are a few other things that drive me up the wall. For one thing, she'll begin flirting with guys the instant she meets them, with me standing right there. (Yes, even my friends that I introduce her too) If she wants to flirt with guys on her own time, she can go ahead, but it's just irritating to have her do it with me awkwardly standing there. And there are also one or two guys which she flirts with to an absolutely ridiculous extent. Take, for example, her extremely close male friend, we'll call him Steven. They both insist that there's absolutely nothing going on between them, and quite frankly, I believe them. Without fail, she'll be all over Steven whenever he's around. And he will blatantly point out how awkward it is with her boyfriend being right there, but she'll just continue.\n\nAnyway, I've been mulling this over for a few days, and want to know how I should handle this with her.", "summary": "Am I justified in being annoyed over my girlfriend flirting with other guys in front of me, or am I just being jealous and insecure?"}
{"id": "t3_o70li", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "It has taken me 10 years to think of a name for Xbox Live. Anyone want to help out?", "post": "My weakest attribute is I can never seem to name things... I still cannot think of something I wouldn't get sick of in a few weeks and I have been attempting to do this since Xbox Live came out back in 2002. I have been using my brothers account since then but he stopped paying for it so now I really need to think of one (or let you guys do it if this gets enough attention). Going for not-too-serious but not-too-silly. I am turning to you guys for this. Even if you don't want to at least upvote this [self] post to increase my chances for people to see this and I can get a variety of responses instead of the two people who look in the new section. I am sick of the name \"daughtercrown01\"", "summary": "If you clicked on my post then think of the first possible name for a live account that pops into your head and post in comments! That is all."}
{"id": "t3_vs8xr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Worst mall/ shopping experience?", "post": "Heres mine, I went to a mall with my mom, her friends and my sister along with my mom's friend's daughter. We rented out one of the big cart things for kids to ride on while we were shopping. As were walking a married couple with 3 kids suddenly stop in the middle of the walkway. I accidently bumped into her, as for her reaction she made a painful and shocked expression. She then starts to scream at me of how careful I should be and I could've hurt her child. ( I don't think bumping into her would've hurt her child in anyway considering she was the only one that was hit, and all her children were at the side.) She screams of how painful her ankle was and telling me that it has a giant bruise and hoe much of an idiot I am. Being a 16 year old I decided to be mature and tell her I was very sorry over and over. As I widh this fight would be solved, my mother started to scream outloud in front of the crowd at the woman for ( As a 16 year old I look older than I look) screaming at me. Soon enough the womans husband come and joins in saying I was being irresponsible for not being careful and was being a mature young man taking responsibility. In my head I did not want their kids and my mom,s and her friend to hear this because obviously the woman started to use profanity in front of the children. I tried to to stop this fight but my mother refused, after about another 10 minutes of bickering she finally gave up and called her a fuck head as her last parting words. I wish it would've been handled more peacefully, but it could'nt have been helped. Never some people would cone out so aggressivley in public.", "summary": "Hit a woman with a cart by accident and she screamed and cursed in front of kids while my mother bickered. While I wished it could've ended more peaceful."}
{"id": "t3_1c55uw", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "16[m] I hate dating in highschool, because it seems pointless, but there's a girl who is borderline obsessed.", "post": "Okay so I'm 16, sophomore in high school, and in my opinion, high school dating is just as pointless as teaching a lion to be a vegetarian. People want to get into it so fast with the 3 little words, and I don't agree with that. But there's a girl, 15 years old, who likes me and I kinda liked her. Notice I said liked. She is so obsessive, and it drives me crazy! I can't even look at a girl without her throwing a fit and stressing. Anyway, a few months ago, she told me she loved me. I proceeded to explain that I don't feel the same way, and that I don't know who I am, so how do I know if I love her. She then proceeded to freak out, and now any friend of mine that is a girl is her \"enemy\" and it's really making me mad. She actually smacked a good friend of mine for talking to a girl that liked me. He was talking to her at a basketball game, and she just walked up and smacked him. He asks \"what the hell was that for?!\" And she said you know what it was for, and left. And she just sat and stared at the other girl, glaring at her. Now I told her to apologize to both my friend, and the girl, and she said she did nothing to them. And I have 8 other people telling me she did. So I guess I just want to know what I should do.", "summary": "over obsessive girl, acting like we're dating when we're not, being mean to my friends, what should I do about it?"}
{"id": "t3_33ebni", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU when answering all on an iPhone goes wrong.", "post": "Today I recieved, as it often happens at my university, a conversation by email between (what I assumed to be) 2 students. Those students were not the first to put the whole university as copy of the mail (thanks mailing lists). But today I recieved those email 8 times and since I was pissed, I decided to answer both of them to tell them to use the mail listing properly.\n\nMy answer went as simple as \"No one cares about your life\". Clever as I am, I send this email from my iPhone on an alternate email adress that doesnt show my name.\n\nIt could have ended here if I hadn't press \"answer all\" and send this message to the whole university who was in copy... worse, my iPhone used my auto signature for the mail which is \"Regards, my name\". Also it turned out that the 2 students were 2 teachers trying to set up a small event.", "summary": "Every students, teachers, head of the uni, anyone working at my university received a mail from me saying litterally \"no one care about your life, Regards, my name\". TIFU"}
{"id": "t3_3pyv92", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my crush [21 M] of 4 ish month, been single for almost half a year now, need help getting back out there", "post": "So I was with my boyfriend for 2 years before we broke up at the start of this summer, I took a little while to move on, but I did, and I'm happy to be single, we broke up on excellent terms and everything good, except I haven't physically been able to move on yet.\n\nBefore me and my ex broke up there was this guy at my uni who I quite liked, but now I'm single he is all I can think about, and I don't want to be with anyone but him. I know its a horrible idea to put all my eggs in one basket but I have to try or I'll never know right?\n\nThing is, whenever I see him I feel like my face is going to explode, I cant look him in the eye let alone make coherent conversation. the other problem is that I haven't spoken to him since the last academic year, and even then we didn't really talk, he just worked on my lab bench.\n\nso how do I approach him subtly, keeping in mind we're basically strangers, and how do i control my unbelievable nerves around him!", "summary": "long time out of the game, how do I break the ice with my crush when I get so flustered I cant look at him?"}
{"id": "t3_xmc19", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/F] Not physically attracted to him and hate his constant whining.", "post": "My boyfriend is a wonderful, caring guy who has supported me through quite a difficult time for me in the past year. We 'officially' got together around March and I have genuinely come to care for him as a person. \n\nCutting to the chase, I have never particularly found him extremely attractive physically, but I was able to look past the looks and appreciate him as a person. He has since gained some weight over the past few months. He IS trying to lose it, in a kind of half-assed way and I want to me there for him\u2026but not a day goes by without him complaining about how despite his hard work, he is not losing any weight. And frankly, it is extremely aggravating to listen to him whine everyday.\n\nPersonally, I have been able to lose about 15kgs (33lbs) a few years back and am still able to keep the weight off and consider myself quite health conscious and knowledgeable about what works and doesn't work. So sometimes I suggest that he eats fewer refined carbs and does more cardio/situps. (His main concern is his belly.) He will refuse to listen and say it doesn't work and how it will only make him fatter because his body doesn't work like that.", "summary": "He complains, but he ignores my opinion on it. His weight gain is not only making me more physically unattracted to him, but also his constant complaints are getting on my nerves."}
{"id": "t3_1pbpgd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my GF [21 F] of 2.5 years, not sure if I want to be with her any more.", "post": "My girlfriend is amazing, sweet, kind, loving, funny.  I told her I loved her 2 years ago and have told her regularly ever since.  However I have never quite managed to convince myself that is true.\n\nThis is my first serious relationship, I have never loved anyone before so I don't really have anything for comparison.  I feel like I do love her, but there are many occasions where I am just not that fussed about seeing her, and when we are apart I don't have much urge to call/text her.  She lives about 5 minutes walk away and I see her most days, but I find myself just wanting to be at home with my guy friends more and more.  Due to being poor students there is not much we can do together except talk, watch TV, and drink.  We have very different music tastes and she enjoys the clubbing scene whilst I do not.  My guy friends share my music taste, love for good tv (not the shit that she watches), video gaming, cooking and occasional cannabis use.  I feel like I just have more fun with my friends.\n\nOn the other side, I do have great conversations with my GF about lots of things, and love just lying in bed with her and cuddling.  I also love having someone I can talk to about anything and I love comforting her when she's not having a good day.  Recently due to a drunken argument she is on the verge of breaking up with me.  My gut instinct is to fight for her back, but with all this on my mind I honestly cannot work out if I even want to or not.  My emotions seem very confused and I don't know what I want.", "summary": "Cannot work out if I want to be with my GF or not, I feel like I love her but enjoy the company of my friends more."}
{"id": "t3_28tcnp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15 M] and my ex-girlfriend [15 F] were together for a year and then (quite suddenly to me, not to her I guess) she broke up with me.", "post": "So her and I had quite a rocky start i guess you could say. Then it became pretty good, entered that \"honeymoon phase\" as I guess it's called. I think that's where it stayed for a while but that's besides the point.\n\nThe whole time that we were dating she was becoming better and better friends with another guy and to be short and to the point she developed into an emotional affair and now she's left me for him.\n\nThe point of this is well as you can tell I'm quite young and... I don't really know how do you deal with a break-up? It was only a week or so until she started dating the other guy. The funny thing is I think he's quite a bit like me. I'm also not quite sure whether she would even admit that it was an emotional affair to begin with.\n\nAnyways I'm trailing off here I just need advice on what to do because I'm angry, happy, sad, and several different variations of those emotions all at the same time.", "summary": "Girlfriend of a year started having an emotional affair, left me for another guy and now I need advice on how to take a break up."}
{"id": "t3_3i859t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 M] can afford my friend's [24 M] destination wedding but think it is too expensive and due to this don't want to go", "post": "About a year ago a friend of mine for 10+ years asked me to be in his wedding. I agreed but not formally, at that time knowing that it was probably going to be in Mexico. This was a year ago and no details were known. Fast forward to now, he just told me today where the wedding was going to be and what days. It's going to be in Cancun at one of those crazy expensive resorts during an expensive time to travel. \n\nBasically for 3 or 4 nights it will be almost $3200 for me and my girlfriend. For me alone it would be $2100. Checked with the travel sites (travelocity, etc...) and they say $2600 for both or $1800 alone. Will have to get a suit/tux at a cost of another couple hundred dollars. To me, this is a crazy amount of money to ask your friends to spend. \n\nThe problem is, I can afford it. I work in tech and make good money but I am a saver. I am trying to pay off my house and burning $2 or 3 thousand for 3 days is just very irresponsible to me. I am doing very well financially and he knows this so I simply cannot have the excuse of not being able to pay for it like a few of our friends are pulling. Everybody else in the wedding party has recently started working adult professional jobs and I know for a fact most of them have student loans and entry level salaries. They are all doing it and not thinking twice. \n\nI just cannot justify this expense. The resort they chose is $500/night. I would never, ever, even consider spending that kind of money on a hotel even for my own wedding night. How can I possibly get out of this without ending our friendship or am I being unreasonable since I can afford it?\n\nI should say he is the type that will just not understand why I wouldn't want to do this as we have completely different outlooks on finances.", "summary": "Friend is having an expensive destination wedding in which I am a groomsman. I can afford to go, but think it is just way too much money."}
{"id": "t3_4pnmev", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [15 F] boyfriend [15 M] is being abused and my mother [40s F] doesn't want me to tell anyone", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend (named Andy) for a few months. I knew he was beaten as a child (with a whip) by his father, but then again, so was I. I assumed his father stopped, and that it was a cultural thing, as he had lived in Israel until two years ago. Andy and his uncle had been eating at a restaurant when he was a child, and there was a terror attack. Andy's uncle protected Andy and died in the process, causing Andy's father to blame him for his brother's death.\n\nI recently learned that the beatings have not stopped. They have instead continued to grow worse, and he is whipped with a belt for things like coming home late or having his music on too loud. At one point, when Andy's father knew Andy and I had kissed, he beat Andy with a belt until his back bled and threw him outside the house until midnight (I am Indian, and Andy's father would prefer he be a with a white, Jewish girl).\n\nI've told my mother what is happening to Andy. She had been abused by her father as a child, so I thought she would understand. She said that Andy is probably lying and that if something was really happening, Andy should tell someone. She said I am being naive, and that if this is really happening to him, it's only an incentive for him to move out when he turns 18. She walked in on us kissing (it was our first kiss, so it wasn't like we were making out) and now she thinks he just wants to use me and is manipulating me.\n\nToday, he asked his father if he could come to my house. He says his father broke his rib and said no when he asked. I told my mother this, asking if I should call an ambulance or something. She said it's his problem, not mine, and that if he wants help, he should do it himself. \n\nIs she right? I really don't have any proof other than his texts to me, but abusers are good at hiding what they do. Should I keep it to myself?", "summary": "My boyfriend says he is being physically abused by his father, and while my mother knows, she thinks it's not my problem"}
{"id": "t3_1cjtou", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me(M/15) and an acquaintance of mine (M/16) have been crushing on the same girl(16)", "post": "Lemme get started. I have been friends with this girl for a little over a year. This acquaintance of mine hosted a party not too long back and told me he was \"going to get her drunk and fuck her\". I just told him to stop being a creep and made sure that I was near her at all time throughout the party. \n\nFast forward a couple of weeks and this douches parents got him a Mo-ped. He's been trying to seduce her with his mo-ped ever since and he is un-aware of how much of a fool he's acting. Anyhoo, this douche also spent over \u00a3200 on her birthday present. I'm still not sure where he got the money from. She is completely oblivious to his dark side, or she's just ignoring it. Really hard to tell with women. My question is should I just go up and ask her out? Or should I be a dick and tell her about my acquaintances actions? Really confused reddit, help me out.", "summary": "Me and a douche have a crush on the same girl and I fear she's going to find solitude in his arms."}
{"id": "t3_qxofv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my friends crazy ex-gf wrecked her car(hit-and-run) while under the influence of prescription drugs.  What to do?", "post": "Long story short, my roommate made a mistake stuck his dick in crazy.  He broke up with this girl, and was gonna drive back home up north to do some thinking.  He turns his phone off for the drive.  The girl, fueled by illegitimate emotions and prescription drugs(morphine, I believe), decided she was gonna drive up north and find her bf.  *Note, she does not even know what town he lives in, only the state.  Well she's driving all fucked up, at night, and she runs into the back of another car.  Rather than doing the respectable thing and taking responsibility for her actions, she takes off, making the situation a hit-and-run.\n\nMy question is, is there anything I can do about this?  Report it to someone, possibly the State Trooper Association?  Now, I like getting fucked up as the next guy(probably more), and I'm normally not a \"snitch\" but this girl could wrecked another person's car while **intoxicated** and could have really hurt someone. \n\nI keep getting haunted by this vision of myself getting rear-ended in the middle of the night.  Imagining myself trying to regain awareness, and making sure all my passengers were ok...and then just seeing the perpetrator driving away.  It just stirs up so many emotions.  Including, but not limited to rage and hopelessness.  \n\nWhat should I do Reddit?  Should I try to follow up on this and contact someone and seeing if there were any hit-and-runs on the Interstate going up North?  Or does this seem like a lost cause?  Or am I just a douche for giving that much of a damn?", "summary": "Friends crazy ex-gf did a hit-and-run on the highway, any way/any reason to try to find the victims?"}
{"id": "t3_1u2jtx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] want to reconnect with a past potential fling [23M] but don't know how to approach it ?", "post": "So there's this guy (lol). About a year ago I went to a party and met up with a guy (W) of whom I knew but reputation due to mutual friends and because he was in the same program as me at school. I almost hooked up with him, going so far as to go home with him but then I stopped it because I was in a relationship at the time (we didn't go further than a few fairly innocent kisses). I really liked him, like a lot, which drove me to break up with my boyfriend but at the time W was kind of pissed that I was with someone else and didn't want to entertain any more thoughts of a fling with me. However after this all went down he friended me on several social medias and we maintained a causal relationship. It's been a long while, and in the past year he graduated and moved back to our shared metro hometown. I'm home for break right now and I'd really like to reconnect with him but I don't know how to do it without being totally awkward even though the situation had totally changed. I've always had a crush on him and I would hate that this old boyfriend is holding us back, though I feel like it doesn't matter anymore and I would hope that I did the right thing before.. Please any advice is appreciated!", "summary": "I made a connection with a guy a year ago when I was in a relationship. That relationship is long gone, how to reapproach this guy without being awkward?"}
{"id": "t3_v4h7v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is my next step?", "post": "So I have worked for everyone's favorite Supercenters for two years. In my first year, I was charged with a partner-family member assault and arrested at my place of residence. I spent 14 hours in jail, missing a night of work because my place of employment doesn't accept collect calls. \n\nAfter I was released, I immediately went to work to speak to my store manager and explain what happened. He then suspended me for five months and five days, which happened to. E the duration of my trial.  Fi five months, I was unemployed and unable to collect unemoyment. \n\nFast forward to January 2012. A coworker of mine was arrested at work for the same crime. He spent 2 days in jail without being able to call in, and came back to work with no suspension. \n\nNow the difference between us is I'm a 20 year old white American. He is a 23 year old black American. \n\nI am infuriated that this kind if discrimination has taken place. The entire management team knows about his charge and I'm pretty sure I have a racial discrimination case on my hands, but I don't know where to proceed. \n\nSo lawyers of reddit, or legal students, what is my next step towards takin action, or am I even able to take action?", "summary": "me, 20 yoa white male arrested, suspended from work. 23 yoa black male coworker arrested for same crime, no suspension. Fucked up much?"}
{"id": "t3_4vk68g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [38 F] with my (ex) husband [40 M] him and he woman he cheated on me with and left me for announced they are engaged. i feel hurt.", "post": "title is supposed to say **the**\n\nPossible long post.\n\nMe and my ex husband were married for 14 years we had 4 beautiful children together. i thought we had a good marriage we were high school sweethearts and best friends.\n\nI found out in 2014 that he was having an affair with another woman but that wasn't the worst part. She ended up pregnant with his baby and he left me to be with her.\n\nI was so hurt and broken, he was posting pictures of him and her on Facebook and they looked so happy. we have shared custody and despite what he did he was still a good father.\n\nits been 2 years since our split and (with my daughters encouragement) have gone on a few dates. i have met a few great guys but don't want to rush anything.\n\ntoday i was on Facebook and just out of pure curiosity checked my ex's page. him and her look so happy together and he looks at her the same way he used to look at me. \n\ni continued looking and they announced awhile back that they are engaged and the wedding is soon. i can't help but feel hurt about this after everything he did he gets the happy ending but i feel like i don't.\n\ni don't know how to get rid of these feelings. help?", "summary": "my ex husband and the womn he left me for are getting married. i feel hurt and don't know how to get rid of these feelings."}
{"id": "t3_2b1rzh", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "I'm fostering a litter of stray Moroccan kittens and need help", "post": "So firstly I'm in a hotel resort in Marrakech, Morocco, and so veterinary care is a problem, I want to help all I can but I'm somewhat limited by being in a foreign country and in a hotel where pets aren't allowed. \n\nOn our second day heading back to our hotel room there was a cat waiting outside our room, she was limping and one of her legs looks dislocated, we let her in to our room as she looked distressed and gave her some food and water. This is when we noticed she was heavily pregnant. Other than her leg she seems healthy, she has a thick coat of fur, no flea bites and she's extremely friendly and happy to be handled.\n\nThe first night labour started but we couldn't keep her in our room for fear of the hotel staff seeing her, luckily we have a sort of private garden area and she found a spot she liked there to start giving birth. \n\nShe had 5 kittens, unfortunately 1 was stillborn, but the other 4 seem healthy and are feeding, I've removed the stillborn kitten and the mother seems fine with that. \n\nI'm pretty sure the maid knows she's in the garden, she cleaned the table outside but left the food and water out for her, so that's a big relief. \n\nI've been bringing her fresh meat and fish and mineral water a few times a day and trying to keep them all as healthy as possible, my worry is the mothers leg, and that after I inevitably have to leave this place she won't be able to provide proper care for her kittens, I've got just over a week left so I want to set them up the best I can before I leave to give them a fighting chance.", "summary": "I'm caring for a cat with a broken leg and her 4 newborn kittens in my hotel garden, I need an exit plan to give them all the best chance of survival when I have to leave in just over a week "}
{"id": "t3_xb0v8", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Need help with my kitten!", "post": "back story: We found him outside in december with none of his litter mates or his mother around. He was about one month old so we took him in(or so my fiance says; I didn't meet him right away so not sure.) \n\nThe issue: I am 27 weeks pregnant and am not sure if we will be able to keep him due to his biting. We love him and he's very attached to us(greets us when we come home, sleeps next to us, cries for us when we leave.) I know he is just trying to play but he gets very rough and has made us both bleed numerous times. How do I break him of this habit?? We really don't want to get rid of him but I can't have him getting that rough with our infant when it comes  in october.", "summary": "Kitten gets very rough while playing and we are about to have a baby. How do we break him of his roughness??"}
{"id": "t3_2xr55j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18/M] really like my friend [19/F] and I'm worried I blew my chances with her. Do you guys think this ship has sailed?", "post": "I've been friends with this girl for a while but we became really close about a month ago, and have been hanging out all the time. Twice we went back to her house after going out and I could tell she was making moves but for whatever reason I was being stupid and didn't do anything but cuddle all night pretty much. In the past I could always tell she was pushing towards being physical and was always really enthusiastic to talk to me or hang out and I was always receptive but I guess I didn't do enough to turn things into a relationship. Tonight we went to the beach and I was planning on kissing her but her body language and demeanor told me I shouldn't, whereas when i think back to previous times I know if I had kissed her she would have been down and she would have furthered things. Now I'm not sure, I really like this girl and I know she really liked me, I'm just worried her interest is gone. Maybe I'm just over thinking everything but it definitely feels like the vibes have changed and they're a lot less flirty. Do you guys have any tips on what I can do to make my intentions clear? She's a lot more experienced than i am so I think that's why I'd been so coy and non-opportunity seizing in the past. I really want a relationship with this girl and I know she felt the same, I just don't know how to make my intentions clear especially when we've never really vocalized feelings for each other romantically but it was very clear just from the way she acted, so that I think it'd be really strange to bring it up out of the blue.", "summary": "Really like girl, I missed a couple of opportunities where she put herself out there and now I'm worried I've missed my oppritunity and she's lost interest."}
{"id": "t3_12gk7x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend [21F] seems uncomfortable with me [22M] going to Hooters. Should I stop going?", "post": "Me: Male, 22. Her: Female, 21. Dating about four months. Extremely happy relationship.\n\nI go to Hooters quite a bit. Maybe about once I week. I usually go with clients from work that I'm supposed to be entertaining. For those outside the US, Hooters is a restaurant whose main selling point is the scantily clad waitresses, but their food is good too. I go for the food, the boobs, and because it's great to entertain clients.\n\nI've been dating a girl for almost four months and we're extremely compatible, but every time I mention Hooters or the Tilted Kilt (basically Hooters with an Irish twist), she seems to be slightly uncomfortable and criticizes the chain. She called them \"skank restaurants\" yesterday. She's usually an extremely sweet girl and doesn't act like this, and definitely usually doesn't slut shame or anything like that.\n\nShe has never and I don't think would ever tell me to stop going but I don't think she's comfortable with it. Should I stop going for her or what?\n\nI know r/relationships jerk reaction is almost always, \"Omg break up with that bitch,\" but that is not the proper response here. I'm in absolute love with this girl and she never acts like this.", "summary": "Girlfriend acts a bit uncomfortable and insecure about me going to Hooters to entertain work clients. Should I stop going?"}
{"id": "t3_2wc90l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26/F] said \"I love you\" to my boyfriend [25/M] of 6 months first... Now what?", "post": "I've been seeing him since August of 2014. We spend the majority of our time together- he sleeps at my apartment, hangs out there most of the day while I'm at work (he's a bartender so we have opposing schedules), we do multiple date-like activities a week, etc. He'll go back to his apartment to shower and hang out with his roommate or just have some \"him time\", but I can't remember the last time he spent a night at his place.  \n\nAt any rate, we've been saying things like \"I like you\" and \"I really like you\" for about two months now. The other day he went home for a while; we were separated for *maybe* 6 hours before he came back saying he couldn't believe how much he missed me, and that 6 hours was too long to be apart. We're obviously in that stage of our relationship where we're crazy about each other.  \n\nThe other night he was being incredibly affectionate, telling me how much he likes me and how beautiful I am and so forth, and I ended up responding \"I love you\" at what felt like a completely organic time. He squeezed me in response and didn't say it back, which is completely fine. I know he cares about me, and some people move at different paces when it comes to using the word 'love'.  \n\nI just don't know how I should proceed. Should I keep saying \"I love you\" because that's how I feel, or switch back to \"I like you\" so he doesn't feel pressured? Would it be completely weird and unromantic to flat out ask him \"Hey, should I not say this anymore until you're ready?\" Any advice would be appreciated. Typing this out makes me feel goofy because I'm an adult woman and this seems like a question a high-schooler would have, but I've never been in this situation before.", "summary": "Told my boyfriend of 6 months that I love him, he hasn't said it back yet. Do I not say it anymore until he's ready, or keep saying it when it feels right to me?"}
{"id": "t3_2vno87", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my GF [21 F] of 2,5 years, sex once/month, see eachother every/every other weekend", "post": "Hi. I'm having troubles finding out if I am being unreasonable, or we're having some troubles. \n\nMy girlfriend and I live 1-1.5 hours apart, and we both study, so funds are limited. We visit eachother almost every weekend, and are together 24/7 during the holidays. It has been like this for around a year, maybe a year and a half.\n\nOur sex life is... not exactly what I expected. We have sex about once a month, even though we see eachother 4-5 times and are mostly alone. Before we moved apart, we had sex pretty regularly, I'd say 3-4 times per week. During the holidays we often stay at our parents', so it's a tad more difficult to have sex anywhere, which is why our stats don't increase during holidays.\n\nHow do I feel about it? not that well. I often go from her with blueballs, as she teases me throughout the day, but won't have sex until we're in bed and ready to sleep, where she often just rejects me if I start kissing her, or she says not today. She tells me that she's nervous about sex, even though it always ends up with both her and me getting off. \n\nI get that she can get nervous about being together with me, as we don't see eachother that often, but I feel pretty awful about never being able to sex her up when it gets to the later evening. I pretty much just feel like a friend she can kiss and be naked with - I don't feel like she actually wants to fuck me :/ \n\nIs it normal for semi-LDR to dull down a bit when we don't see eachother? \n\nI apologise for my English, it's been a while since I wrote out something. \n\nThanks", "summary": "GF and I see eachother every weekend/holiday, only have sex 1/4 or 5 visits, not much improves during holidays. Is it to be expected from semi-LDR, or should we be having more sex?"}
{"id": "t3_1ab3oj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I[16f] convince my mom to let me date", "post": "I got in trouble last April because my mom found out I had sex. Ever since I haven't been allowed to date. Things were getting better and we were building trust, but then my mom found out in December that I fooled around with this guy on my cruise. \n\nNow I met this amazing guy that I really like and who might like me. There's no way I can have a proper relationship with him without my mom knowing so I have to convince her. He's a christian and a virgin so those are points in his favor but I'm just not sure if she'll let me", "summary": "I haven't been allowed to date ever since my mom found out I had sex. Now I met this great guy and want to pursue something but I have to convince my mom to let me"}
{"id": "t3_2hwf4l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] have been going out with a girl [22F] for a month, she just said she loves me, I'm notsure I love her", "post": "So, I've been seeing this girl for the past month and things have been super intense, things were amazing, I couldn' stay away from her and I was sure I was in love.\n\nThe problem is that in January I am moving away for work, ~400mi., I know it's a relatively short distance, but it's a remote part of the country and I don't know how often I'll be able to get back. I've done LDR once and it was the most god awful experience, don't think I want to do it again.\n\nThe bigger and more realer problem though is that I went  away on a business trip over this last weekend and I cheated on her. Yesterday when I got back we met up and she told me she  was in love with me. I don't think I deserve her love anymore, and I'm not sure if I actually do love her, I mean, if it was so easy to just go ahead and fuck her over, then this can't be love, and  if that happened over a weekend what will happen when I move away for good?!\n\nWell, after she said she loved me, I was at a lossfor words and all I could do was stay quiet. She asked me if I loved  her back and I said I thought I did, but explained the moving away part. She already  knew about it, and said she was ok with it and that she'd make it work.\n\nShe's the nicest girl I know and such a great person, but I just don't  think I love her...\n\nGuess I'm a weak man, and I'm not sure what I hope to gain from writing this all down, but it's at the very least therapeutic, thanks.\n\nFire away, I guess.", "summary": "Been seeing a girl for a month, I am moving away in January, I cheated on her over the weekend, yesterday she said she was in love with me and I couldn't say I loved her back."}
{"id": "t3_2eym45", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I'm 18 and have 7 thousand dollars from saving. Where should I put it now?", "post": "Hi guys,\nI don't exactly frequent this subreddit but I'd really appreciate any advice you guys can give on where, how, when, why and what I should do with the money I've saved, as well as, what to do with future money I will save.\n\nIf you're curious for more information about my financial situation...\n\nBasically, since I started working at 15 I have saved half of almost all of my paychecks. I started doing this so I could have some spending money but also be able to save for bigger purchases (like my car last year)\n\nSince the beginning I have kept all saved money aside from my checking using a small safe only I know the passcode to.\n\nI have a small amount saved still and plan to continue saving half of my income as long as my expenses are almost non-existent like they are now.\n\nI have lived with various friends for the past 5 years and came to this subreddit since I didn't exactly have anyone to ask around me.\n\nAs for the half of my income that doesn't go to the safe, that is budgeted up to cover food, gas, and other expenses.", "summary": "what is the best way to save my money that I could quickly get a hold of it if i needed to and wont cost me an arm and a leg to hold the account open or retrieve my money."}
{"id": "t3_3jgsqi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[21 M] relationship with my [ 21 F] girlfriend of 6 months who is also my best friend is breaking", "post": "I am in a committed relationship with her and now i feel like i am not connected with her at all. we got committed right before my college was getting over. But the thing is i still havent cleared all exams and also i dont have a job yet. Now during this phase she started to not appreciate me like how she used to. like she used to mock me whenever any simple thing goes wrong.\n\nThis got to me and i started getting less attached to her. Now the problem is i dont have many close friends to talk to. She was the only girl i was close to.Other than that there are just a few friends who are just \" hi bye \" kinda friends. I also have a lot of problems at home as parents are too worried about my future. Now since parents started getting worried and she started mocking me infront of some people it started affecting my self esteem like any thing. I started procrastinating because i scared too much and now i started wasting so much time, not doing anything because i keep worrying about what she does.\nSo yeah after she started mocking me, she started getting closer to other people which is cool but then she flirts with them right infront of me which is very upsetting.\nFrom a relationship where there was no domination, its starting to look like she is taking advantage of me being cool with her talking to her friends.\nIts taking a toll on my life and my thoughts. \n\nAnd one more thingis, i used to say i'm going to do this do that, which my friends made me realize that i was asking permission from her when thats not my intention at all. I realized that i am really insecure. I am not happy at all.", "summary": "Passed out of college with no job in the middle of the relationship and thats affecting my love life and my personal life. What do i do reddit?"}
{"id": "t3_1yyrrx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16 M] Kissed her[16 F] during a trip to a Naval ship, What's the next step?", "post": "So this has been a buildup of nervousness, after I losing a bet and she had me kiss her during our schools trip on Monday to a US naval ship. She didnt make me, I lost a bet and followed through, I wanted to do it. After I kissed her, she stuffed her face in my chest and hugged me. I asked her \"what now?\" We than later \"joked\" about seeing a movie on friday, She told me next time Ill kiss you and it will be longer. \n\nI really do like this girl. It's been a buildup of 2 years coming, the only thing that bothers me is that she is going to prom with a senior she says is her really close friend, It sorta bothers me but not really. She had been making a lot of interactions with me and it was led up to this kiss, my first. Should I try and bring up that movie? Except I actually kiss her and not her kiss me. I hate the feeling of her having to walk me through it and I feel it will kill it off if she thinks im too damn nervous.\n\nI ended up texting her that day and she told me the kiss \"it was cute\"", "summary": "Kissed a girl after we made a bet to do it, whats the next step? Should I bring  up that movie she talked about? "}
{"id": "t3_u1uhi", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Should I switch schools?", "post": "Reddit, I've been home schooled all of my life. I have never set foot in a public school as a student. But since 3rd grade I've always been at least partially involved in programs where I take classes at \"alternative schools\" for part of the week. I'm currently a freshmen at one of these schools, and during high school they pretty much just take control of your education. So it's essentially a small public school where I only have to go 3 days a week.  But my consultant has suggested an interesting proposition to me. \n\nShe suggests that I should switch to my local high school. Being the small program that I'm in, we don't have that many options. In fact, my schedule's going to a little fucked up next year because I took a few classes early in high school. On top of this, she feels that I'm not getting challenged enough, especially since my class is one of the lowest scoring classes in recent memory (which I don't disagree with). I could get into the honors classes at my local high school, and have access to resources my currently school could only dream of. \n\nBut I would still lose a few things if I switched. Mostly I would lose the friends that I've made at my current school, but to be frankly honest I never hung out or talked with them outside of school. Also I would have to start getting up a few hours earlier and go 5 days a week. The workload would be higher, and when I asked my friend what she thought of when she heard the schools name, she said: \"pregnancy\".\n\nI'm torn Reddit, what do you think?\n(Yes I know turning to the internet isn't the best thing to do when making life choices, but I want to get as many opinions as possible.)", "summary": "I've been home schooled all of my life, but my councilor thinks that I should switch to a potentially shitty local high school."}
{"id": "t3_16picd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me m[18] and my gf[18] are having issues with my ex[22]", "post": "So over the summer my ex and i had a nasty break up she took everything the wrong way. We never really even \"dated\" or whatever you want to call it we were more of friends with benefits (for me at least). But after it happened it turned into that stereotypical situation where she would blow my phone up, write me letters, send her parents to my house, lie and say she broke up with me and i wanted her back and all that stupid shit. So, about six months ago my gf and i started dating and her and my ex absolutely HATE each other. they already have history with each other but that's not why I'm here.  She is seriously coming between us and I don't know how to deal with it. I have never been happier with anyone in my whole life and she feels the same way. But there is always drama going on it makes my gf not want to be with me anymore like that if she wasn't with me she wouldn't have to deal with her. The girl is saying we're harrasing her and that we won't leave her alone and she's going to the police because of it. I just don't want to lose my gf whom I've never been happier with because of some crazy ex. I apologize if this seems jumbled up i'm not really use to writing this kind of thing i mostly post to no sleep.", "summary": "There is a crazy ex coming between my gf and I and I want to know how to deal with her without losing my gf."}
{"id": "t3_3yr3m1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 M] ex [25 F] invited me to her apartment tomorrow. I've gained 40 pounds since we dated and I don't want to be embarrassed.", "post": "A girl I dated my freshman year of college called out of the blue and asked if I wanted to spend New Years with her. I said yes, but now I'm worried that she'll be disappointed as soon as she sees how fat I've gotten. I went from 160 to 200 pounds this year. She hasn't seen me in almost three years, so she'll definitely notice the change. We used to have really good sex and that's pretty much the only reason we stuck together for so long. I know by her tone that she's only looking for a hookup, but I'm actually scared that she might just laugh at me and tell me to leave. Should I just cancel?", "summary": "I have a date with an ex but she hasn't seen how fat I've gotten. Should I just cancel to avoid embarrassment?"}
{"id": "t3_1oba4l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] bf [21M] of 1 month constantly talks about his ex-girlfriend...", "post": "Hi all, \n\nI [22F] have been dating my bf [21M] for around a month now, and everything has been going great! \n\nBUT there's one problem... he CONSTANTLY talks about his ex-girlfriend. I'm not really the jealous type, so for the first couple of weeks, I didn't mind it. I figured that since they dated for over three years (they broke up 9 months ago), it's inevitable that she would be part of most of his stories and anecdotes... And I really enjoyed how open we were being with each other... \n\nBut now that it's been over a month of him mentioning her at least 3-4 times a day, it's getting a little old. Things that he mentions about her include her food preferences, cute little things she used to do, what she would get angry about, her sexual preferences, things that used to bother him about her, etcetc. The whole shebang.  \n\nIt doesn't make me jealous or worried (should I be? haha), but it does irk me a little... Since it's not a hugehuge deal, is this something that is worth mentioning? Should I simply hope that it'll die off after a while?", "summary": "My bf of 1 month mentions his ex-gf at least a couple times a day, every day. Is this something that I should be worried about and mention to him?"}
{"id": "t3_3v8f8r", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Best way to admit feelings to a good friend?", "post": "After reading many posts on the subject, I know I should just tell my friend my feelings and get it over with. But what is the best way to do this? Anyone ever been through this and can offer some advice? Or best way to mitigate hurt feelings?\n\nHim and I have been friends for a couple years now, we have a lot of similar interests. A few months ago he broke up with his most recent boyfriend and we really reconnected as I helped him through it. Since then we've started hanging out a lot more often and even go on \"dates\" about every week or so. Although, they're under the guise of being just a platonic date. At some point I started realizing that I have feelings for him and I would really like to take our relationship to the next level.\n\nWe talk all the time now and play video games together almost every single day. He's started saying things about our \"future\" together and bringing up all sorts of things weve talked about in the past. Like having a business together and moving in together when his lease runs out etc. And he often sends me a message the second he gets out of work or wakes up (he works odd hours). So I feel like the feeling is mutual, especially since his behavior has really changed a lot from what he was like before. Although this past week he's been mentioning other guys that he thinks are hot or he could date. And I'm not sure if he's seeing if I'm jealous or if he's just not into me. And the last time we went on a \"date\" after my roommate teased us of dating, he mentioned that he didn't understand why two friends couldn't go on platonic dates together as we walked to my car. Although, I'm sure I've said somethings to make him think this is all just friendly etc.\n\nSorry for ranting but needed to type it out.", "summary": "Seeing really good friend for dinner this weekend and want to tell him how I feel about him. Advice? Stories of personal experience?"}
{"id": "t3_15mx8v", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/m] weird statement from SO(f/20) or am I overreacting?", "post": "My SO recently stated she wouldn't mind if I cheat on her. I'm not sure what to make with this statement. I would never cheat in any way, however, she did in her past, but was never cheated on herself. She says she can't understand how it feels, but she wouldn't probably mind as long as it doesn't change anything between us.\n\nDoes that mean now she likes me so much that even if I cheat, she wouldn't leave me or is she trying to make an excuse already for cheating she might do? I am really confused, I have never heard anyone saying something like this. I always thought if you like someone, you don't really want to share him like that.\n\nI appreciate any opinions!", "summary": "GF said she wouldn't mind if I cheat, confused & not sure what this statement really means (I would never cheat!)."}
{"id": "t3_2x6108", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by competing in a poetry slam on drugs.", "post": "Years ago and all that. \n\nI was at a music festival I've been going to for years, and competing in their poetry slam which I had done a number of times and had started to get recognized. \n\nNow, I had just got a wisdom tooth removed and I was on painkillers. \n\nFor those of you who have never seen a poetry slam, it's multiple poets performing pieces and there are a number of judges that give you a score, top ten or so go to the next round, two or three rounds, and you can win things. These events are hosted by someone from the local poetry scene and they MC the event. \n\nFirst round, I nailed it. Did a very long piece called Meladies that I'm rather proud of. It was a long double entendre about picking up girls and writing music. It's tasteful but boy is it suggestive. I was 3rd place out of maybe 20 in the first round. \n\nSecond round, I go immediately after a girl who did an amazing and moving piece about equality and fair treatment. \n\nIt should be noted here that the co host of this particular slam was a rather attractive poet that I most definitely had a thing for at the time. She even seemed a little wooed by my first piece! Score! \n\nSo it's my turn, and me, trying to get some cool points with aforementioned co host, say \"Man let's give it up to these hosts, they're killing it.\" \n\nDead silence. Awkward. \n\nI do my second piece, nothing in particular, just some rhythm and rhyme. Decent scores, snaps during it and all that. \n\nThen the co host girl gets up and says \"Uh did you say hoes or hosts?\" \n\nApparently I slur my words when I'm on drugs. I already looked like a man slut after lines like \"I can cop two in a pinch, at the same time like, wanna split a seven inch?\" and \"So I started rhyming, bumping that back seat rhythm, cus I have a way with words, then I have my way with them.\" Then I call a girl a hoe after she does a passionate piece about equal rights.", "summary": "Called a girl who just did a very passionate poem about equality a hoe because I was on painkillers, thus ruining my chances at winning the slam and my chances at getting some action. "}
{"id": "t3_2euwy5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex's [18/F] mother [40s/F] is being a psycho about me breaking up with her daughter.. three months after it happened.", "post": "I broke up with my psychotic ex-girlfriend a few months ago. It's not important why we broke up, but she was just crazy to me and it was getting annoying so I ended it. We were together for a year.\n\nSo after the breakup, she was distraught and resorted to talking shit and spreading rumors about me. A lot of unneeded drama that I really did not want to deal with.\n\nLast year I also got suspended for a couple weeks for bringing some pot into school (super dumb decision, don't have to tell me.) My ex got SUPER upset and pissed off for over a week and her mom was really chill about it. This is important.\n\nHer mom was always a bit nutty and weird but I never really had a problem with her, she seemed harmless. Honestly we always got along pretty great and she loved me but after I broke up with her daughter, she just always talked shit about me to other parents. I brushed it off, no big deal, it's just her being immature. \n\nNope, three months later, I'm talking to my friend and she says \"hey, [ex's] mom is talking shit about you to all the parents at soccer games telling them that you're '[ex's] druggie ex-boyfriend.' Like really?\n\nIt's seriously gotten to the point where I'm tired of dealing with this family's bullshit and I still have to put up with it after three months of post-breakup drama.\n\nI don't know how to handle her talking about me to other parents and calling me a \"druggie ex-boyfriend.\" I barely even smoke pot. It's immature as hell and I want to stop it but I don't know how I would.", "summary": "Ex-girlfriend's mom is talking shit about me to other people and calling me a druggie after I broke up with her daughter three month ago, what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_46qxcv", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "OMG this is so frustrating. Anxiety can seem like 'failing at life'", "post": "I have lived thousands of miles and several timezones away from friends and family, in a totally different culture, where to understand the local language you need to learn three new alphabets, but now that I am back in my home country and considering moving away from the big city and my hometown (to somewhere quieter, to do something less stressful), I am finding it hard to overcome anxiety and actually make the move.\n\nI have travelled alone for several months in far away places, taken risks like leaving a stable job to work as a tour guide, but since a traumatic experience at the end of my time overseas, I have been experiencing anxiety.  \n\nI have never experienced this kind of generalised anxiety before.  Previously I would have embarked on this kind of move knowing that there were risks but also that it was worth the effort.  \n\nI came back with some savings and wanted to give myself a break since my time abroad was a bit intense and my job when I came back was not at all interesting.  I have already left the job but now each day that I don't do anything it's very frustrating and hard not to become negative and feel stuck (trapped).\n\nI'm sure I'm not the only one who has experienced this and I am sure there is a different way of looking at it.  I am looking for examples of how you may have overcome this kind of situation.\n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Moved back home after three years living abroad, want to move away to a quieter, more relaxing place and do a less stressful job but finding it hard to overcome anxiety."}
{"id": "t3_3sdvka", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23yo F] with my now ex boyfriend [24yo M] dated for 10 years, we broke up 4.5 months ago. He has already moved on and I am heartbroken.", "post": "Broke up with my ex boyfriend of 10 years about 4.5 months ago. I found out about 1.5 weeks ago he has been dating someone new for a couple of months- they aren't official yet but it's only a matter of time.\n\nPrior to me knowing this I had been doing reasonably well, I was going about my life almost as normal and was using the time to rediscover myself after being in a relationship so long. I had heard he was doing the same, and I was proud of him because when we ended things we both talked about it and agreed this was a good time for us to both do so. He had also made it clear to me that I was the one he wanted to end up with, and the idea of likely getting back together with him was something I was working towards.\n\nSince I found out about this new girl I can barely breathe. I have been crying constantly, have been psychosomatising and feeling nauseous often, and I started to have panic attacks at work. I can't concentrate on anything and have felt demotivated in almost everything. \n\nI spoke to him about it and it was good for closure but awful to hear how distant he is now- he has very much moved on from me and is very into this new girl.\n\nHe was my first boyfriend. I am afraid I will never be happy again, and that I will never find anyone that makes me as happy as he did. Has anyone been through anything similar and has any advice on how to cope with this in the best possible way? I can't see us ever getting back together after this, so I need advice on how to move on also.", "summary": "My ex boyfriend of 10 years has already found someone else and I need advice on how I can best cope with this/move on"}
{"id": "t3_1if1mm", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Proud of my son - spanking related", "post": "I know this might be a controversial post.  My cousin was visiting with his family.\n\nOverall, good weekend and my son (4) had a great time with his kids (3.5 and 7).  The last night they were at my house, my cousin's daughter came and told him that her brother (3.5 year old) hit her.  He called his son to come down the hall.  He asked his son why he hit her and he said, \"Because I wanted to hit her but I said sorry\".  Took me a good bit of effort to not laugh.  \n\nMy cousin got up and started walking towards his car.  His son immediately started freaking out because he knew what was coming.  My son was pretty confused.  My cousin came back in with the paddle.  He took his son down the hall and gave him a paddling.  No real screams just crying.  \n\nMy son was curious about what had happened.  I explained that his cousin got a spanking.  He dropped it at that point.  \n\nThe next day, my son asked me to explain spanking so I told him exactly what happened and why.  My son more or less asked why it was not ok for the boy to hit his sister but ok for his dad to hit him.\n\nI was dumbfounded by the fact that he gets it.  We have always explained that hitting is not acceptable.  He doesn't hit and we don't hit.  If my son does hit, we don't respond with spanking.  \n\nI just couldn't believe it but it made me proud that he put those two things together.", "summary": "Cousin spanked his kid for hitting his sister.  My son asked why it wasn't ok for the brother to hit his sister but ok for the dad to spank his son."}
{"id": "t3_1ttv8a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [29 M] broke up with my GF [30 F] a little over a month ago. How much \"alone\" time is right to recover from co-dependency?", "post": "I just amicably/reasonably mutually ended a relationship with my girlfriend and have been using No Contact to facilitate the healing process. I'm still mourning the relationship and trying to move forward.\n\nRight now I'm struggling with my past: I have been more or less in a relationship for the last 12 years (since I was 17) and haven't spent a lot of time \"alone.\" My relationships have been 7, 3, and ~2.5 years long with only a gap of about 6 months between the first and second. I've done a lot of reading and thinking about it, and I'm pretty sure I have co-dependent/\"Nice Guy\" tendencies. As a result, I feel like I may have alienated a lot of friends/family, but they're still in strong orbits around me and accessible.\n\nI know it's been 35 days since the break, and that recovering takes time and thought in delicate balance. But at some point I know I have to move on and start \"getting out there\" and expanding my social circles. It feels difficult, but I am looking forward to the challenges it brings.\n\nMy question is this though: I hear everything across the board from embracing the loneliness and sitting with it versus spending as little time alone as possible. I want to spend the time/energy to feel more comfortable being alone and be more confident on my own, but I'm not sure what ratio of friends/public/solitude is healthy for my recovery and the construction of a new self.\n\nIs there a compromise? Being alone in public places? Hanging out with a lot of low-impact friends? Hanging out with a few intimate friends?\n\nIs there a way to figure out this balance?", "summary": "Broke up with a long-term girlfriend a month ago. Not ready to jump into a new relationship, and I want to know how to effectively balance my time being alone versus being social."}
{"id": "t3_355mic", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How the heck should I [26F] start talking to my boyfriend [28M] of 2 years about marriage?", "post": "I'm a little tipsy, but hopefully this still makes sense.\n\nI'm getting ready to fly to visit my boyfriend's family (on the other side of the US)  for the 4th time, and I really think it's about time to start thinking about marriage with my boyfriend.\n\nWe've lived together since October of last year, been together since April of 2013, and we are very close. We love each other, and say it every day. My family thinks he's great, and vice versa. He and my dad text each other about their 3d printing hobby. His mom sends me birthday gifts. Things are great, but we never talk about marriage except in very hypothetical terms. Like, I've asked him, \"Can you see yourself getting married to me?\" and he said \"Of course\".\n\nBut how do I ask about making it actually happen? Should I be blunt, like \"I want to get engaged in the next two years! Are you in?\" \n\nI'm so scared that real talk about marriage will freak him out. I've heard so much about how men are trying to avoid marriage. I don't want to lose the best relationship I've ever had because I was too impatient about marriage.\n\nPlease help!", "summary": "Great relationship, but too scared to ask about marriage (even though I want to) because I don't want to ruin the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_w915v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Are you a rich person who's feeling a bit philanthropic...is interested in Doctor Who...or just wants to read a typical college student complaint...?", "post": "I'm going to be a sophomore next year at UC Irvine and the only way I've been able to afford college is through loans. I wasn't awarded a single cent in grants or scholarships. I don't understand why I haven't gotten anything... I'm a Hispanic female, top of my high school class (well...bottom of the top...I got two B+s), took 9 AP classes and passed every test, 7 of them with 5s, I'm one of 6 children with divorced parents who make...oh...right....they make just enough for me not to qualify for anything from FAFSA. I'm a Cognitive Psych major hoping to double in Studio Art and shooting for a PhD in Psych. I'm starting up my school's very first Doctor Who Club next year but...of course...it doesn't count for anything. I am asking anyone who feels slightly sympathetic for my case to help me. Whether it be showing me  scholarships I can apply to (besides all those useless ones that you apply to every week online...), advice on how to make money, or you know...a loving donation. I can draw you a picture, please. I need money for school. :[\n\noh god how pathetic of an attempt to have strangers give me money. forgive me internet. I need the money.", "summary": "I need money for school, I deserve it but can't get any scholarships/grants. Would you like to help me?"}
{"id": "t3_2acatd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] with my SO [19 F] of 6 months, went out came back with hickey in neck. How to bring up", "post": "This happened a couple of weeks ago. She went out on a night out with friends, a mixture of guys and girls.\n\nWe went on holiday together the day after. In the evening of that first day, she brings up that she got a hickey the night before from one of the guys. She tells me that this guy, while drunk, came up behind her and bit her neck, leaving the mark. She was completely open about this, and didn't try to hide any of the details as far as I can tell. At the time, this seemed plausible and I didn't think anything more of it.\n\nHowever, having had time to think about this, I am aware that it would take some time to give someone a hickey. As far as I am aware, it could not just happen from a guy biting her neck randomly. \n\nI was just wondering if you could give me some advice of the best way to bring this up with her in a non-accusatory way, as I do trust her completely, just need some questions answering I guess.", "summary": "Girlfriend went out one night, came back with hickey, claimed a drunk guy friend gave it to her by biting her neck, but nothing happened and she pushed him away. How to bring this topic up again?"}
{"id": "t3_30unej", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by hitting a kindergartener in the face, probably giving him a black eye.", "post": "obligatory: My wife actually did this about 20 minutes ago but I just had to share.\n\nThe following is her story:\n\nBackground:\nI used to work part time with kindergarteners as a teacher at an after school program at my local Community Center. About two months ago I got a full time offer to work in the centers pre-school, infant care program, so no more after school program. \n\nFast Forward to today:\nTFIU when one of my old kindergarten boys saw me walking down the hall. He ran up, gave me a hug, and asked asked when I was coming back to his group. This made my day, and even more after I told him that I wasn't coming back and he got very upset over it. He really missed me! After this touching moment I turned around and headed back to my classroom. Little did I know that he was following right behind me and when some called out to me from behind I spun around to see who it was and I managed to smack him right in the eye!", "summary": "I used to teach kindergarteners. Today one told me how much he missed me and then I hit him in the face. He doesn't miss me so much anymore."}
{"id": "t3_138a2y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My grandmother is in a nursing home suffering from advanced dementia.  She had her wedding ring from the 1940's stolen from her today.  Reddit, who is the lowest of your low?", "post": "My grandmother suffered through the depression, and her entire life never borrowing so much as a dime from anyone.  She built her life from the bottom up.  She eventually became a published author as the housewife of a social security employee in a time when women were not expected to break the post-war stereotypes.  Her husband of 50+ years died in 1996.  The last few years she suffered crushing illness and was placed in a nursing home by her daughters.  Today I found out her wedding ring was stolen off her finger.  She is immobile and pitiful.  I can't decide whether I am more angry or depressed that someone would stoop so low as to steal the wedding ring off of a defenseless crippled old lady with no possessions of value in her life.", "summary": "My mad, crippled old grandmother had her only worldy possession stolen from her.  I would like to hear some stories of the most pathetic evils you have endured, or been witness to."}
{"id": "t3_1jr3m0", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Friend's parent is dying. He's extremely clingy and needy.", "post": "My friend is one of the nicest guys I know. Very genuine and inclusive and inviting. A few years ago he joined the military.\n\nHe came back abruptly when he found out his mom has cancer. He's the oldest of five siblings, and he's back from this military with no idea of what to do with himself. \n\nMeanwhile, I'm trying to get my life back together. I had a similar situation years ago and I kind of lost it. My sister was hit by a train and killed. I moved across the country because I hated being known as the guy who's sister was killed. So, I'm spending as much time as I can preparing for school.\n\nI noticed his clinginess when I tried to hook him up with one my girlfriend's friends. Everything was going well at first, but he started calling her every day, expecting to hang out every day, etc. When we all hung out as a group with mutual friends, he'd basically stare at her and talk at her. She felt cornered most of the time. She felt he was moving too fast (she had just gotten out of a bad relationship).\n\nAnyways, since then, he's been calling me at least once a day. I don't mind, but I'm trying to spend as much time on my own life as I can. I've told him this, but I still feel bad when I don't answer his calls. I think it's excessive.\n\nAnyways, I'm wondering how to help him. I need to focus on my life, and I've become reclusive since deciding this. He constantly wants to hang out. He told the girl that I hooked him up with something along the lines of \"I don't like being alone.\"\n\nI want the guy to be happy, but I need my space as well. It's really hard considering the burden he has involving his mom's condition.", "summary": "Friend's mom is dying. He's clingy; calling constantly. How do I help him while also continuing to focus on my life?"}
{"id": "t3_1qhi7u", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Until what point is it worth doing something you hate and living a life you hate?", "post": "Hello everyone,\n\njust for some background: I am a computer engineering student from Brazil who absolutely hates what she does. I hate both my program and this stupid country (please don't take it personally fellow Brazilians) however I have only two semesters left to finish my program. I also recently came back from an exchange program in Canada that delayed my graduation in a year.\n\nNow, getting this stuff off my chest: as said previously, I absolutely HATE the program! I hate it! I can't stand it anymore!! I just want to shoot myself whenever I am in class or doing some kind of homework. Why did I continue you ask? As stupid as it sounds, it is simply because my parents made me and because the program is free (here in Brazil there are certain kinds of university that are for free, but they are harder to get in). Basically if I left, I would've been forced to start working full-time and I didn't believe I would be able to get into University again for free again in those circumstances.\n\nAt this point I feel like it is too late to give up, and if I do so, I will be throwing many years of hard work in the trash. But on the other hand, I am just so miserable right now... As far as I am concerned, working delivering pizzas for the rest of my life sounds like a brilliant idea compared to what I am going through now. I really don't know if it is really worth going through this much stress in order to try to get a degree. I just want to go back to Canada and live a simple life with my SO who also lives in Canada\n\nI am having many major crises lately of how much this situation sucks and how I think I am wasting my life doing something I hate and that I should just throw everything in the air and go find something or some place that makes me happy.\n\nSorry if this sounds very selfish and not really a major life threatening issue, but I really needed to get it out and need some advice on how to cope with the situation without shooting myself before hand.\n\nThank you for your time.", "summary": "less than a year left to graduate, hate my field, hate my country, want to leave everything and just live a simple life"}
{"id": "t3_2rlp68", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] am confused with whats going on with [18 F]", "post": "I started talking to a girl on tinder about a month ago, hungout with her and everything was good. We talked NON STOP day in day out texted till 4-5am then the same the next day. We hungout two weeks ago, she told me she liked me and we kissed and acted all couply. \n\nShe then asked me to a new years party, and then I noticed she was slowing down on talking to me. I asked whats up and she said her mom gave away a beloved pet/was jam packed with homework. \n\nSo she ditched me on new years.. she texted me that night saying hey blah blah Two days ago she'd just text me once in the morning, and today in the morning saying how stressed she is over school and stuff. Also noticed she's been active on tinder again and changed her display pic.. Thoughts?", "summary": "In summary, I met a girl on tinder and she's not acting how she used to be and I can't tell what she wants."}
{"id": "t3_43rwt7", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "How to find someone's address (Australia)", "post": "Hey guys, really frustrated and need some help.\n\nMy friends and I had a 5 bedroom house and needed a fifth person to move in. We found this guy on flatmates.com. Because we were all so close/trustworthy/stupid/inexperienced, we always emptied rent into the real estate agent's own account directly. We never emptied it into a shared account before giving it to the agents, which was fucking ridiculously moronic in retrospect. \n\nAnyway, 6 months later the prick moves out and Hocking Stuart send us a message saying how we are late on rent, by $3000. We find out the dude who just left hasn't been paying rent. He blocks us on Facebook, won't answer our calls.\n\nWe call VCAT (Victorian Civil and Administrative Tribunal for non-Victorians/non-Australians) who say this is a civil offence and they can take care of it, as long as we provide them with his address.\n\nThe idiot left us his mum's number, his work place number, his licence number and a bunch of other details. We tried going to the police who said they can't divulge information or something, we went to VicRoads pretending he'd crashed into us and they said we needed a solicitor. His mum is useless, we haven't contacted the boss because why would he believe us.\n\nWe are so frustrated we have no way to find his address and he owes us a lot of money. I'm a Uni student who lives out of home. I have to pay rego and insurance and bills, I need money... Is there ANYTHING I can do??????", "summary": "Housemate flaked on us without paying rent, owes us 3000 have exhausted all ideas about how to get his address, which is necessary to launch an investigation with VCAT supposedly...."}
{"id": "t3_1khusd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[19M]; my girlfriend[18F] of one year is cheating on me.", "post": "So my girlfriend of almost a year met a guy of the class above her at a university event. They became friends, and I'm not the jealous type so I thought nothing of it. I first became suspicious when she went to watch a movie with just the two of them at his place, but I didn't want to be an imposing dick so I didn't say anything about it (this was about 2 weeks ago and they met about a month ago). She went off to an exam today and forgot her phone at home. She kept getting texts and phone calls so I thought it might be a family emergency and I looked at her phone to check it out. It was the guy and he was sending her all sorts of sexual messages, and her responses were not as sexual but she was still saying some stuff. From it I've gathered they've hooked up at least once (I think sex), but she seams to be trying to put a stop to it. What do I do?", "summary": "Girlfriend is cheating on me with a guy, but she might be trying to stop it. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_33onrw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25/F] started dating a [35M] 4 weeks ago. He still takes care of his ex's kids.", "post": "He lived with his ex for 3 years, and helped raise her kids, the father was not there for them so he was their father figure at the time. They are now 6 and 8 years old - he goes to his ex's place every morning to take them to school every day and picks them up afterwards to take them to his ex's place. He takes them out to the park and sometimes they sleep over at his place. \n\nI can understand that, strictly speaking, he broke up with her, and not with the kids that he claims to have grown so attached to. However I'm wondering whether I should be concerned about him possibly still having feelings for her.\n\nShe calls him daily and constantly texts (she has a boyfriend now), however part of me is wondering whether I should run away from this situation or be understanding about it.", "summary": "he has constant interaction with his ex gf because he takes care of her kids, don't know if I should make a run for it because he still might have feelings for her"}
{"id": "t3_3x1638", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Im [20F] confused on how to handle a scary situation my ex [21M] has landed in", "post": "So me and my ex have had a very rough break up (after about 2 years dating) , I only broke up with him because of his constant lies (mostly about drugs/hanging out with druggies) but I remained good friends with him. \n\nI still care about him very much, obviously. I would never of broken up with him if he didn't lie to the point of ridiculousness! \n\nAnyways, He is now in rehab for drugs. He calls me a bit, and his parents also call to check in on me, make sure I'm okay. I just have no idea how to handle this situation. We've been broken up for ~4 months and I feel like I don't have a \"role\" to play in any of his rehabilitation, but id love to be there for him and help. \n\nFor example, His parents want him to move in with them in a different city after he gets out of rehab to avoid all the bad influences where he used to live (mostly his \"friends\"). He is NOT willing to do that. I really want to tell him that if he doesn't move in with his parents I will cut communication/contact with him until he moves in with them. but is it even my place to do that?! The last thing I want to do is abandon him but I want the best for him and being near his \"friends\" will inevitably lead to drug use, at it ALWAYS has! \n\nAlso if theres another subreddit that best fits this question/plea for help, please tell me!", "summary": "Ex gf of a \"mild\" drug addict (is that even a thing?). Still good friends after breakup, don't know how to precede to help/dont want to overstep boundaries."}
{"id": "t3_3qg9k3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by reading a TIFU while ordering food", "post": "I walked into a fast food place to grab lunch and arrived in the line slightly before a couple of older women. I opened bacon reader to check what's good on reddit while waiting in line. They women were positioned as if they were going to go ahead of me and I planned on letting them. Gentleman thing, you know? \n\nFor the record, I was reading this post: \n\nThe time came and one lady looked at me as if waiting on me and, with phone in hand, I said, \"Go ahead, mam.\" She looked at me with a slightly disgusted look, adjusted her jacket and went forward to order. I can only assume she thought I wanted to take pictures of her butt or something, which definitely was not the case. I still can't reason why I received the response I did.", "summary": "Waiting in line to order food; decided to be a gentleman and let a couple older ladies go before me while I read bacon reader; received look of disgust."}
{"id": "t3_26dk04", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm so confused.. any insight?", "post": "My boyfriend ( 37yo) and I( 41yo) have been together almost a year, we moved in together about 3 months ago and everything was good, but about 2 weeks ago he stopped having sex with me?  He is still affectionate, still comes home every night nothing else has changed he just says he's too tired to have sex?\n\nI'm starting to get a complex about it, feeling unwanted, unattractive and frankly I am a bit lonely.  I try talking to him but it's like talking to a wall he says nothing is wrong he loves me yet I get nothing in regards of intimacy.\n\nI know the \"honeymoon\" period wears off but after only a year I didn't think we would just not be having sex... can anyone offer some advice on how to get us back on track?", "summary": "My boyfriend not having sex with me anymore....  Should I be concerned?  Can anyone offer me some advice on anything I could do to spark the flame again?"}
{"id": "t3_vbsfq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I Caught my future MIL Cheating", "post": "M28 with gf of  4yrs F21 just ran into one of the worse possible situations for me. \n\n My future in-laws and I began to speak about one year ago. They have been together for about 26 years, He is a overprotective jealous guy, she is a personal trainer. She decided to get her certification to become a personal trainer and got a job at a big box gym against her husbands wishes. She originally was working out of her home with elderly couples but it was not financially rewarding so she decided to work at a big box gym. \n\nThis morning on the way to work I was getting gas when she walked out of the gas station holding another personal trainers hand. As she was walking out I guess she spotted me and walked up to me and began to have a conversation with me while the guy waited in the card. She went on to say that they came by just to get coffee and some bottled water for later that day. She said they were just friends and hoped that I understand.\n\nAlthough I only seen them hold hands, I don't think this is normal. I don't know if I should tell my gf what I seen. I don't want to break her heart. Also, I'm sure she would tell her father which only ends with either them separating and maybe my gf or her mother blaming me for it, or they work it out, look like a guy that put my nose in where  I shouldn't have.", "summary": "Caught future in-law cheating, don't know if I should spill the beans. If I tell I might be seen like a nosy person."}
{"id": "t3_3w3zcj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [35F] exgirlfriend doesn't want me [24M] to be a part of our, not yet born, child's life and I don't want to be either. Am I making a mistake?", "post": "My ex told me on the weekend just gone that she is around 3 months pregnant, I had no idea, and didn't tell me until now that she is pregnant.\n\nWe met yesterday to talk about what to do, in which she explained that this was her decision and doesn't want me to be a part of their lives but would feel guilty for not telling me.\n\nPersonally I do not want a child for financial and emotional reasons. So, the idea that I am going to be a father never the less, and she really doesn't want me to be a part of it, is putting a lot of strain on my moral compass to whether I actually want a relationship with this child.\n\nI'm just not sure if I'm making a massive mistake and would like advice.", "summary": "my ex is pregnant but doesn't want me to be a father, I don't want to be either.. am I making a mistake by not"}
{"id": "t3_102exu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Guys and Gals of Reddit, I experienced a new awkward today. Why and what are some things you do or have experienced that were really awkward similar to this?", "post": "I had a second interview with this company and I'm just baffled by the manager that interviewed me. With a good guess I'd say he was about 26, and I'm newly 20. Anyways, I was put together very professional-no cleavage was out or heavy makeup. While interviewing me, almost every time he asked me a question he would look down below my face while I was speaking to him. I always look people in the eye so he had to have known I could see what he was doing. But he kept doing it! And when he looked away from me, I would quickly put my hand to my chest to see if anything was there. Nothing. No cleavage, or crumbs, or something weird worthy of staring at. He was so calm and nonchalant about it too. I'm mostly used to this as I developed early and awkwardly in middle school, but when I would catch guys looking it was always instant red face for them. And the quick glance to anywhere but my chest like it never happened. Overall the interview went really well and we connected on growing up in small towns in crappy states and such, and he was very nice to me. I just don't get why some guys (this guy in particular), have no shame or embarrassment doing that. I don't think I would be able to stare at a guys package while knowing he's looking right at me. Especially in a more professional setting.", "summary": "Had an interview, manager that interviewed me kept staring at my chest even though I had no visible cleavage and was looking right at him."}
{"id": "t3_1nkt2p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Travelers of Reddit, what is your worst experience in a hotel?", "post": "My work used to require me to travel quite a bit.  At my peak, I was in a hotel around 200 nights a year.  During this time, there are several stories that really stand out.\n\nNormally, I would check in on Sunday afternoon, and check out on Friday morning.  It seemed as if I could sense that problems were on the horizon, weird things start happening and then something really messed up happens.  \n\nWork that week was especially tiresome with 14 to 18 hour days.  On Wednesday and Thursday, I had to order room service because there weren't any restaurants open by the time we were finished that day.  I finally went to sleep very late Thursday night, and there was a knock on the door around 7 AM.  Mildly annoying, but it happens quite frequently when the cleaning crew thinks you've left.  I open the door, and she apologizes for the intrusion and leaves.  About 30 minutes later, there's another knock on the door, and it's one of the front desk people.  This time, I'm not very nice to them because I'm sleep deprived and I could use the extra hour of sleep before the next day of work.  She says that I've checked out and I need to leave because I'm trespassing.  I responded by saying that I had been in my room sleeping all morning, I couldn't have possibly checked out.  She leaves and 30 minutes later *ANOTHER* knock on the door.  I didn't even open the door or look out the peep-hole, and told them to get bent.   The response from the other side of the door really woke me up.  \"This is the city police department, open up.\"  Now I'm really pissed, and open the door.  The cops were really cool about the whole thing, and I had to explain that I was a paid guest and had requested a late checkout when I checked in.  I showed them my reservation and they left.  Let's just say that when I actually went to check out, the hotel manager didn't have much to say while I told them what I thought of their \"customer service\".", "summary": "Paid guest at a hotel, told that I was trespassing, and they called the cops.  I yelled at the hotel manager when I checked out."}
{"id": "t3_42b5e0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] with my Ex BF[34 M] 6 months, dating exclusively", "post": "Be sure to explain in detail wHi, today, I feel more down than any day after my ex boyfriend break up with me out of the blue, I've been praying and having hopes to have him back, or at least him to text me or call me to know about me, he was always lovely and sweet, now hes cold, hes someone else, I never thought he could be the person hes now, everything hapened after I met his parents, he already knew my parents, and we spent a lot of important dates together, with my family an his family, Im posting here because I want so bad to text hi to contact him, but I dont know if thats is degrademe or make him feel uncomfotable, thats the last thing that I want, I just want to keep having hope in him, and know if hes coming back.", "summary": "Any one in out of the blue break up? Do I have to contact him? does hes coming back? why he did this?"}
{"id": "t3_1d691v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend isn't sure that we are compatible and I'm not sure what to think/feel. [20f,21m]", "post": "Hi guys. So, the SO and I had a long talk tonight. Lots of tears and apologies and whatnot. The thing is: if he gets upset with me he'll stay mad at me for hours even if it's just a misunderstanding and if I've already apologized for it.\n\nMoreover, he gets annoyed that I get annoyed over little things (since he's a guy and he doesn't understand why these things might upset me even though I try to explain them to him). \n\nSo overall: he is doubting whether or not we are compatible because there are some fundamental things that we do which annoys the other person. \n\nI just feel like we fight a lot about silly stuff and that ultimately these things add up which makes us hesitant to talk to each other (I tend not to stand up for myself sometimes just to avoid conflict which might possibly go on for the next 10 hours).\n\nDoes this mean that we're not 'compatible'? How do I fix this? (2 years)", "summary": "we have long disagreements about silly stuff and it's getting to me and him. We're not sure how to fix it and whether or not this makes us incompatible."}
{"id": "t3_swc02", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A year ago I cheated.  He wants out and I'm falling apart.", "post": "I'm 22 and have been with my husband for 3 years.  A little over a year ago I cheated.  We had a lot of issues.  Basically I felt like he didn't love me and didn't care to listen to me.  We fought and most of the time when I brought up something I was upset about he seemed to turn it around to be my fault so I quit talking. Instead I started talking to a friend of mine who actually seemed to care and listen.  When me and my husband had a fight my friend was always backing me up which felt nice.  One thing led to another and I ended up cheating.  \n\nI regret it.  I hate myself every day for it.  I have since cut off all ties with said friend and we live a long distance apart.  Me and my husband decided to try to make things work.  We went to counseling three times since it happened then things felt a bit better so we quit going and started focusing on our up coming move.  We get here and things seem to be okay.  We're sort of in a rut but I've been doing my best to show how sorry I am for what I did.  We finally settled in here and things seemed to be looking up after a pretty crappy year.  \n\nToday I mentioned I was abnormally content only to be told that he can't see us staying together and maybe we should split up.  Obviously I deserve this but I am crushed.  I don't want to lose him and I don't want him to hurt anymore.  He said he'd love for him to feel the same way he did about me but he isn't sure it's possible because of what I did.  He said what I did may just be the end of us.  Has anyone been through this before?  Has anyone's relationship been pulled through the mud so badly only to have it work out?  I feel so lost right now.", "summary": "I cheated a year ago, he wants to leave, I want to make it work.  Anyone been through this successfully?"}
{"id": "t3_2zbore", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24m] need some advice about a close friend [21f] we just connect so much its.crazy", "post": "So me and this girl let's call Kim have been friends forever almost more than friends but the timing has never worked out when we first started talking I was dating my ex fiance and when that relationship went south she was ready to be with me. \n\nSeeing as I had just got out of a bad relationship I told her I wasn't ready. Now she has a boyfriend she hates but doesn't want to leave him seeing as she is almost done with nursing school and doesn't a) have anywhere to live b) doesn't want any life changing my events seeing as she is under.enough stress as it is. \n\nSo we started talking again in January and the depth of our relationship is slowely getting deeper. This past time when we met up she cheated on her bf with me. She keeps telling me to give her a few months and wait till schools.over and we will be together. We talk everyday all day she always calls me first.thing in the am to tell me good morning and at night Well I live about an hour and half from her and she said she wants me move back home. I really want to be with her but I'm worried that ill move back and away from a good job and she won't leave her bf. I'm stressing about it I think about it.constantly. idk what it is about her I've slept with a couple girls since we've been talking which she said she is fine with but she doesn't wanna know about them. Basically I'm trying to get this off my chest and look for advice.", "summary": "I'm head over heels in love with someone I can't be with right now and don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_oxtgc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Im creating a street paper in Europe called \"Comika\", which is based on comics. Most of its content will be from people who send in their comics or allow us to use their existing ones. Would anybody like to contribute?", "post": "The goal of a street paper is to provide homeless people and asylum seekers something to sell and get donations from. We want to create a paper that people not only buy because they want to help, but because they really enjoy it.\n\nWe (me and a friend) are currently putting together a first issue and are making and collecting comics from the city and around the world. If you have a self-made comic, would like to draw or have an idea for one, then we would love to see it! \nYour comic would be printed (hopefully) thousands of times and distributed in Vienna, Austria. Credit to the author would of course also be given. (name and website)\n\nEvery level of skill is allowed, we can fix or complete rough sketches as well. \n[Here is an example of one that I did today](\n\n[Layouts for 1, 3 and 4 panel comic strips](\n\n[Our website] (currently still in development)\n\nYou can post a comic/idea/sketch here or send it to us directly via email at admin@comika.at.\n\nThanks for any support and we'd be really interested in any comics!", "summary": "Collecting comics for a homeless street paper, dont be ashamed if you have no skill in drawing, we can fix it."}
{"id": "t3_nizm0", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "How to get over betrayal?", "post": "Ok, not sure if this is the right subreddit but I'll give it a shot. \n\nDetails: When I was 25(f) or so I was dating my ex 28(m) at the time. Needless to say it ended badly. He cheated on me with his roommate, got her pregnant and refused to move out of the apartment where he was living. I realize now it was probably stupid to ask or try to salvage the relationship but I was very naive.\n\nMy issue is that I still have a very strong feeling of betrayal from the whole thing two years or so later. I thought we had a little rocky relationship but I loved him so much and never thought he would cheat. I even discussed him having a female roommate who might of had feelings for him before hand in a rational manner and we (me, ex and roommate) talked about it to make sure it was all out in the open and I thought they were adult enough to handle it since my ex said he wasn't interested in her. Also I had worked with his roommate in my job and didn't think she was the type to cheat...\n\nI think it was also so shocking because I got the news by my ex calling me and telling me his roommate was seven months along, he was going to be a dad, and that he wanted to work it out with me. The fact that my judgement was so wrong, and that he knew but didn't acknowledge that she was pregnant and played a boyfriend to me for seven months was so soul destroying. A fact that both he and she chose not to say anything and string me along was cruel...\n\nQuestion: I still have feelings of sorrow, pain, anger and betrayal and I don't know what to do to get over it. I lucked out and found a great guy who was 10x better than my ex but I can't seem to get over this. Every once in a while this issue/feeling rears it's ugly head and I feel helpless and pained. It's not constant like it was in the beginning but after two years why haven't I been able to leave this in the past? Time really hasn't made to much of an impact on making me \"feel better\".", "summary": "Ex bf cheated in a horrible way, can't figure out how to get over negative emotions about the ordeal even after two years."}
{"id": "t3_2o706x", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Is My Employer Being Unreasonable? Or How Can I Be Better At My Job?", "post": "I have been at my new job for 8 days - a small business with about 5 employees. In short I am taking over the jobs of two people who are leaving and were in drastically different roles (both have worked there for 10+ years) and have been given about 2-3 days of training in each role. Despite my diligent note-taking, I still don't know what I'm doing. \nBoth my roles within the business should allow for everyone else's day to run smoothly but it is still early days and there is no one to advise me due to the small size of the business. I don't want to keep going to my boss with stupid little questions as he is always busy but I still have so much to learn but feel as if I'm expected to know it all right now. One of my predecessors has assured me I will be fine and has left after I was in the job for 2 days. I don't want to tell my boss I'm struggling as I feel as though he feels he took a risk in hiring me (as I'm unexperienced) and I want to seem capable.\n\nThe thought of going to work tomorrow fills me with dread as I feel way out of my depth as I'm having to work things out by myself.", "summary": "I feel as though I need more training for my job and I'm way out of my depth. Is my boss being unreasonable to expect me to already have a grasp on both roles? How can I be better at my job?"}
{"id": "t3_xncc7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I am a programmer who signed an NDA, and I need advice.", "post": "Ok, so here's the situation. It's a bit messy. \n\nI was contacted to work on a project for a group of close friends, with one of them holding majority stake. The group of friends created an LLC.\n\nI signed an NDA, and I signed a contract outlining what work I need to do. Since that point in time, the group of friends tried to kick out the majority stakeholder, and he was having none of it. \n\nThe head dude decided to disband the LLC, and create a new one with him as the only person in it. Since then, the other guys decided to start up a new LLC with a similar idea, because they still want to move forwards with the project. \n\nI have a sneaking suspicion that the original dude wants to sue. I was just wondering if I have anything to worry about, as I'm not part of the new LLC, and the original LLC I signed the contract with has disbanded. Also, as a contracted programmer, I'm not necessarily providing any ideas or making my own thing, I'm just coding to their requirements.", "summary": "I signed an NDA, the company disbanded, a new one sprung up out of its ashes, can I do work with the new company?"}
{"id": "t3_326y9e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(18m) like a girl(17f) who is dating a friend of mine(18m). Last night I did something super embarrassing and I need advice.", "post": "I am 18 in highschool, there is a girl, let's call her Lena,  she transferred in, and I liked her immediately. I showed her to my friend, let's call him John. John proceeds to go behind my back and go after Lena.  John and I have been friends for about 9 years or so, but he has always been a bit of a dick.\n\n I've been really salty about it for weeks now, and last night he even invited her to out karaoke night that we do. So I took this chance, and spend the whole night singing songs about how I liked her,  Jesse's girl, Mr steal yo girl, he will never love you like I love you etc. I knee John would be mad at me, but he did me wrong 1st right? He actually tried to fight me earlier today. \n\nHere's where it gets interesting,  Lena messages me on fb, and asked me what was going on. I told her I had to tell her in person, so she met me at a park near my house and I spilled the beans, I told her how I liked her all year, and how I told John about it and John went after her anyway. We sat at the park and talked for like an hour and a half. When she was leaving she gave me an extra long hug, I could be reading too much into it but it seems that she might like me back. She also told me to call her or text if I wanted to talk.  What should I do?", "summary": "I like a girl,  who my friend is dating, I saw her 1st, and I sang to her, she might also like me back."}
{"id": "t3_1vd00v", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My girlfriend [20/f] of 4 years and I [20/m] are debating whether to continue on or not.", "post": "I'll try my best and keep this a short post.\nAs the title says, our relationship has been spiraling downwards recently, and we just barely got through our 4 year anniversary. We both are unsure why but we argue so much the past couple months, and now it's reached a point where we are both sick of fighting and we both don't know what is wrong with us. On top of that, she made a point that we are both still young and I have not dated anyone else before (she is my first girlfriend so far, I want to keep it that way) and that I should see other girls because she is afraid that I will get bored of her in the future and possible cheat on her (I have no intention to). My girlfriend has several ex's but they are from when she was around 14 years old maybe younger, and they were 'stupid' high school crushes and that I was the first proper boyfriend.\nI'm also studying in Sydney for 4 years (we both live in Hong Kong) and we barely managed to do 1 year of long distance relationship, and she is unsure if she can handle 4 more years of LDR. She suggested we take a break from each other to see other people while I am away but now we are talking about if we should break up entirely.\n\nIs this just some silly young love? Do I actually need to date other girls? I doubt any other girl will be as good as her, even if she is my first and only girlfriend. I value this relationship too much. She does too, but it's not working out anymore.", "summary": "if anyone has seen WongFu's ['Strangers, Again'] short we are exactly like that, at the end of stage 6. Downhill. "}
{"id": "t3_1ofyjk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How the fuck do I let go after 11 years of relationship and 1,5 year breakup. Me [38 M] accidently saw pictures of my ex [31 F]. Thrown back into the pit of despair and I miss her and it hurts. Please help.", "post": "I was looking for a picture and I stumbled upon some pictures of my ex. And all the feelings I thought had subsided, flared up and caught me by surprise.\n\nI stopped having contact with her when I found out she cheated on me before she broke up with me. I understand why she did it, and I'm not really mad at her. But the next best thing I could do was breaking all contact to give me space to heal. I wasn't particular best boyfriend material, so I am not blaming the breakup on her. In fact, I see my own depression resulting from a suppressed past to be the source of the breakup.\n\nIt's just that my ex is still in the back of my mind and the feeling of the breakup haunts me to this day. I feel defeated and see myself as a waste of space when these feelings get the better end of me. Whatever I do, it always ends up at me missing my ex.\n\nI just miss her and I constantly keep thinking if the **No Contact rule** is healthy or not.\n\nI sure could use some wise words from you.", "summary": "Saw picture of my ex. Still miss her deerly after more than a year. Not sure if I am ever going to get over her."}
{"id": "t3_33e2n9", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Awkward situation leaving me confused as to how to react", "post": "A friend of mine, someone I have known for the past six years is getting married in August. Through a mutual friend, I discovered that he had received in the mail a save the date card sometime around Christmas and an invitation earlier this month. Now, not being invited would be one thing and I wouldn't care about it, but there is something leaving scratching my head. \n\nThe mutual friend only met this other friend through me. In fact, he was surprised he was invited at all and said something to me about it since he isn't really close to the groom and has only met the bride once. I on the other hand, in addition to knowing the groom longer and better, also got this guy his job. Last summer we went to baseball games together, we get together all the time and do all this stuff, so I don't think their is a strain on our relationship. \n\nHowever, I haven't gotten an invitation to his wedding. He has mentioned it before that he is getting married, has told me it was in August. \n\nThe question I have now is: do I say something? There is nothing to indicate I wouldn't be invited and I would think I would be. It is as if someone forgot to send me an invitation. Or do I just let it go? I am confused about how to handle this in a way that is not tacky. If I am not invited, that is perfectly fine, but I don't want him to think that maybe I didn't return an RSVP or blew it off or something.", "summary": "Friend is getting married, a third mutual friend who doesn't know the groom as well as I do got invited and I have not been. Do I say something or just let it go?"}
{"id": "t3_xjmn3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I wrong?", "post": "So its not really important but I, the guy, am 16, and she is 17. Anyway, today, I thought I would surprise her by walking to her house in the middle of the day because we were both just bored. I don't drive, but she does all the time.\n\nSo I finally get to her house after an hour of walking and she seemed really happy about it, but once I get inside, we both start talking and doing what we usually do, and cuddle etc. So then I start trying to make out and stuff like that, but she just says that she's not in the mood to do anything. (shes not on her period, trust me I know).\n\nSo, it's not that I didn't want to see her or anything, but I feel like I got a little cheated because I didn't walk an hour to watch TV, ya know? Anyway I was just wondering if it's wrong that I feel like I got cheated? Cheated isn't a good word but I can't think of a better one.", "summary": "Spent an hour walking to GF's to just watch TV and got no action and feel cheated, am i wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_54rci7", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Co-Signature Loan Issue", "post": "Good morning Reddit! \n\nMy fianc\u00e9 and I are having an issue. About 3 years ago we were very good friend with another husband and wife couple, Amy and Craig. They were on vacation with us in Vegas when my fianc\u00e9 proposed and all was well. Amy was set to be my maid of honor. \n\nAfter we get back from vacation, Craig wants to buy Amy a new wedding ring for their anniversary. They married young and she had a very small ring, and he could now afford a larger one. He went and applied for credit at a local chain jewelry store, but was told he needed a co-signer in order to be approved. He asked my fianc\u00e9, who agreed. Not ever knowing we would ever have an issue. Craig's payments were only $75 a month, but was for a 5 year interest free loan. \n\nFast forward two and a half years later. We have fallen out with the couple due to their selfish behavior. Since the fallout they have made 1 late payment. My fianc\u00e9 called and told Craig to take care of it and not to let it happen again. Until yesterday, they made the rest of the payments on time. Yesterday my fianc\u00e9 received another call about 2 late payments on the account. This is now killing my fianc\u00e9s credit, with 3 late payments on his credit that aren't even his! We are in the process of trying to save for a house and plan to apply for a loan soon. IS THERE ANYTHING WE CAN DO TO GET THIS LOAN OFF OF HIS CREDIT/OUT OF HIS NAME???", "summary": "Fianc\u00e9 stupidly agreed to co-sign on a loan for a friend. Friend is no longer a friend and is making late payments which are now negatively effecting his score. How can we get it taken off?"}
{"id": "t3_2k0qfz", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by getting fired at the most unfortunate time.", "post": "I was fired last week from my seasonal part-time job on a haunted hayride with no explanation beside I did not 'fit in' to the 'family'. I drove the mile from my house to the farm to get my paycheck only to find that it was shorted a day. I immediately brought it up to the owners wives who promised to remedy the situation. \n\nTurns out that the same night I was there, possibly the exact moment, someone was stalking the wagons in the woods, and fired a BB gun at a customer, wounding her. My phone was dead and my tv was stolen so I had no idea what had occurred when I went back to follow-up on my pay the following weekend The woman at the desk identified me, called the boss, who called the detectives, who came and interrogated me. \n\nNormally, I recognize that it is a terrible idea to talk to cops because self-incrimination and all, but I was caught completely off-guard and had no idea what was going on until I eventually caught on to what had happened and they filled me in. Regardless, I may feel undervalued by with the employer but I am not a psychotic criminal. \n\nI fear that I have told them too much (which is true past hello) and that if they don't catch the perp then they will come after me. I agreed to a polygraph, and talked to my lawyer, who told me not to do it because it often comes out inconclusive. I cut off contact with detectives whom hopefully recognize that I am honest and harmless. Nonetheless, my family has been freaking out at the thought of getting raided and/or searched based on circumstantial evidence.", "summary": "Fired from my job for not fitting in, next weekend someone shoots a customer, now I am a suspect, and my family is worried that we may get raided."}
{"id": "t3_3srn3s", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by pissing in my eye", "post": "Well this happened probably 14 years ago, before the age of Reddit.\n\nSo I was at a Chicago Cubs game and I am probably like 7 years old or some shit. After downing Pepsi and Mountain Dew all day at the game I had to go to the bathroom. I went with my dad and brother into the bathroom and as my brother and dad hit the urinals, they expected me to use the stall as I was pretty short, as most 7 year old boys are. Well fuck that noise, IMMA BIG BOY. So my brother and dad are kinda watching me as I get on my tip toes to direct my stream into the urinal. Well I slipped a little and my shaft hit the edge of the urinal, causing it to point upwards and the stream went up in the air and right into my eye.\n\nTo do this day no one believes that it happened untill I bring in my brother to confirm the story.", "summary": "Was too short for the urinal but wanted to feel like a big boy, slipped, shaft was redirected, stream of urine straight into my eye."}
{"id": "t3_2359eb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How should I [18M] go about approaching / reaching out to a friend [18F] of a friend?", "post": "So there's this girl that is a friend of one of my female classmates. The girl doesn't go to my school, but lives reasonably close by. I noticed her a little while ago through the abundance of photos of her on Facebook -- she's a photographer and, honestly, has more albums than most people have photos -\u2013 and became extremely interested in her as I learned more about her interests. \n\nWe've interacted indirectly or inconsequentially a few times, such as when I complimented her on a few of her incredible photographs (sometimes she throws them on Instagram) and she thanked me in response. She has also been \"liking\" an increasing number of my posts and photos recently, and has \"poked\" me quite reliably on Facebook.\n\nI am not under the illusion that these social networking interactions are overly meaningful, nor have I drawn any foregone conclusions from our online interactions so far. I describe them here largely as a \"she knows I exist\" baseline from which to work.\n\nI've only ever seen her in person one time, though I did not have the chance (or the nerves) to approach her on that occasion. \n\nI'm a big believer in first impressions. \nI'm unsure if I should bite the bullet and formally initiate communication *online*, or try to orchestrate a *face-to-face* meeting (preferable, but more difficult to bring about in a timely manner) She works at an orchard and I was planning to go there for the apples once it gets warmer and introduce myself if I run into her.", "summary": "She and I -- fundamentally strangers -- have been beating around the bush but have yet to really \"talk\" in any respect. Is a Facebook message an acceptable introduction?"}
{"id": "t3_fkc0j", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "A business is using my residential road for their customer parking, wat do?", "post": "Forgive me if this is in the wrong reddit.\n\nA very nice steak restaurant is located down the road from me (not on the same street), and recently they added enough new tables that they have severe overflow onto my neighboring residential street.  My street is narrow, hilly, and there's hardly room for the people who live here to park, much less this restaurant's customers.  They have a dinner rush, so when I get home at 5:30 there's no place to park because my street is filled with huge, poorly parked, yuppie SUV's.\n\nI have called the police for advice twice and an officer never called me back.  Not sure how to go about this, because the restaurant is a mainstay of my city and its owners and clientele are very well connected.  Is there anything I can LEGALLY (or gray-area legally) do to stop this?", "summary": "A nearby business is using a residential street for their overflow to the detriment of the residents who live here.  Police won't respond.  Wat do?"}
{"id": "t3_2ex688", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (22F) boyfriend (22M) wants to go to a twerk contest and invited me to go with him...I feel really uncomfortable already.", "post": "There's a group of really trashy people in my area that throw parties that revolve around a bunch of half naked girls acting really trashy and slutty and doing a lot of cocaine off each other's boobs, butts, other body parts... This group is holding a twerk contest at a local bar and my boyfriend is all ecstatic about going. He did invite me to go and I said I would, but I'm a nervous wreck.\n\nYes he did invite me, but I still feel weird about it. He sarcastically told me not to be jealous of the other girls, just to \"grab his boner and everything will be fine.\" It's all he's been talking about all day. Am I wrong for feeling a little bit down about myself? I do have my share of insecurities, I don't get mad at him for checking out other women, I just feel really uncomfortable already and I'm not even there yet.\n\nHe told me I didn't have to go, and not to come if I'm going to be negative the entire time. I would feel even more uncomfortable if I were to let him go alone with his friends. He's going to be staring and gawking at a bunch of trashy girls shake their asses while I stand there feeling uncomfortable and somewhat down. He said not to worry, seeing all those girls will just make him want me?\n\nHow can I go and be an awesome girlfriend and feel comfortable with him out and out staring and getting a hard on over these girls? I want to make him happy and I want both of us to have fun.", "summary": "my boyfriend wants to go to a twerk contest and invited me to go, however I am somewhat insecure and a nervous wreck about going. How can we go together and both have fun?"}
{"id": "t3_25e8gw", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Booked a holiday apartement in Prague (CZ), paid comission, but found out we might have been duped.", "post": "So, my girlfriend booked a holiday apartement close to the town centre of Prague, Czech via a hotel & apartement booking portal a few weeks ago. Since she's the one who usually does this and we never had any problems with the location she'd chosen in the past, I never had any doubt. She got in touch with the owner via email, got his banking account and paid a small commission.\n\nThis evening (1 day before our trip), I wanted to look up the route to the apartement and also some pictures of the building, but then I saw something that was slightly off. The apartement, advertised on many booking platforms on the web doesn't look anything like on the pictures according to Google Streetview. I started digging a little deeper on the web and eventually found out that this is indeed some sort of scam: The apartement exist, the owner exist, but the pictures as well as the apartement description seem to be taken from a different hotel. The actual one is, according to some commentaries on travel website just a dirty shithole, as many travelers had to find out.\n\nNow, I'm asking: What could I do? I don't think there is any chance to get our commission back since we don't have a insurance for that booking, but can we face any legal consequences if we.. simply don't show up? We intended to stay at another place, if we manage to find one within 12 hours (airplane tickets are already booked and paid.. so what), but we really try to stay on the safe side.", "summary": "Booked an apartement in Prague, paid commission. Apartement seems fake according to Google Streetview and booking portal commentaries and ratings. Can we just.. not showing up?"}
{"id": "t3_3f0f04", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with GF [27F] of 4 months. Worries about age, what i want and what she wants = no butterflies. Is this a sign that it just isnt working? Has anyone ever broken up with someone for no real 'reason'?", "post": "I met this girl in a bar and had a one night stand. Ever since we've been inseparable however lately I have felt bored/uncertain about what she is after/what I am after. \n\nShe's gone away for 2 weeks and I havent missed her, in fact the only feeling I have had has been that anxious feeling you get in your tummy. She is a bit of a party girl and has been to a festival and did't call for a few nights. I don't think she did anything I just feel weird about it. \n\nShe is 27 and I am 23. Surely the difference means something. It doesn't feel like it does (she is a young 27 and I am an old 23) but I can't help but think it kind of does. \n\nShe lives with two guys who she is super close with an in many ways are platonic boyfriends. They are both pretty into drugs, she has mentioned how she likes cocaine and whilst I have tried it I would never a) pay for it or b) risk getting caught in Aus with it. \n\nThere are other issues around sex and stuff however just reading this post has made me think the decision is pretty clear. I think I don't want to break up because she is a good person, very hot and she actually likes me (I am honestly amazed?!@). \n\nI guess my real question is do I risk never finding a pretty girl who will fall for me again or do I just settle for semi happiness (mostly derived from the lack of unhappiness).", "summary": "I am not 'unhappy' but I'm not excited. Is this normal or is it a sign I should break up?"}
{"id": "t3_h9obu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I can't enjoy music anymore because of an obsessive tendancy. What can I do?", "post": "Ok basically this started with a pair of malfunctioning headphones and has now escalated into something which is affecting my day to day life.\nSo one day my headphones broke, one ear went and so I had to buy a new pair.  This ended up happening more than once, so i started becoming cautious and regularly checking.  Eventually it happened again, with the bass going in one side.  This is when the checking started becoming obsessive, I really started to try and hear any slight differences in the sound in either ear to check if any new problems were developing.  It got to the point where I couldn't tell anymore and any slight differences bothered me.  Eventually I got over the obsessive checking but it left me with a really unpleasant side effect:  I can no longer actively enjoy music.  When I try to listen to music on an mp3 player I end up just listening to the differences between headphones and not to the actual music itself and I can't stop myself doing it, kind of like when you pick out a particular rhythm in a song and you can't help but only notice that rhythm.  This doesn't seem like a big deal apart from the fact music is a driving force in my life and I hoped to get into a career in music journalism after finishing university.  You might say \"just stop listening to music on your mp3 player\" which I would do, but now the whole mess has tainted my enjoyment of music in other formats... simply because any music reminds me that I have this problem.  This is causing me to become depressed and I just want to enjoy music again.  I'm going to seek advice from a professional and hopefully get congnitive therapy but I wanted to know if anyone else has advice or has suffered similar problems and can give their two cents worth.", "summary": "Obsessively focusing on the sound of both headphones and i can't stop myself, what can I do to stop this habit?"}
{"id": "t3_1bl2rb", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "She[19F] broke up with me[19M] after only 3 weeks dating. Now she is hanging out with my friends and its awkward when we hang out. Any advice?", "post": "We dated for about 3 weeks. Neither of us had been in anything close to a relationship before, but (I think) we had a really great time for at least 2.5 of those 3 weeks. Then out of nowhere, she breaks up with me the day before Spring Break, but says she still wants to be friends. \n\nIt wasn't too bad over Spring Break, because we only knew each other from college. However, once I got back things started to suck. She lives in the same dorm as ~10 of my friends here, so I introduced them and we all hung out while we were together. The problem is, she still hangs out with a few of them after break. The one time I hung out with them and her since break ended, it was pretty awkward and we both just avoided each other (it was at a party so it was easy). My friends don't want to exclude her, partially because they have to see her all the time, but they feel awkward asking me to hang out if shes there (which is often) because they think it will be weird (which it probably will be again). \n\nI've tried talking to her about it a couple of times, but shes blown me off.\n\nHas anyone else been in a similar situation? Any advice on how I should handle it? Avoiding that group of friends isn't really an option that I want to consider.", "summary": "Gf broke up with me, still hangs out with my friends but its awkward when we hang out. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_3h8tgg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [23/F] am considering a long distance relationship for the first time and I am terrified..", "post": "Thanks to reddit I've met a wonderful person who has unexpectedly made me consider a long distance relationship. I've talked to many people online but the moment we started talking I knew it was completely different. He's perfect.\n\nLuckily I'm starting a new career where I travel so I know within 4 months I will be able to meet him. \n\nWhat I am worried about is the 4 months leading up to that time. I've never even thought I'd be in a position to be with someone so far but he makes me want it.\n\nThat's where I need your help... How do I/we make this work? What are some things that makes this long distance thing a little easier?\n\nI'm open to sending things in the mail if that helps.", "summary": "I met an amazing guy. He lives 7 states away. I've never done long distance and need some help with how we can make the distance work until we can meet in 4 months. "}
{"id": "t3_4yppbd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[F23] I've been dating a guy for two years [M22] who refuses to publicly acknowledge our relationship", "post": "To start, my SO has very severe social anxiety and has a very hard time with having attention on him. That being said, we've been together for two years now and he still will not call me his girlfriend or publicly announce our relationship at all. He knows this hurts me, he does feel bad about it, but he just doesn't want us to be public right now. The thing is, he seems to see this as something completely normal. He genuinely doesn't seem to get why I want us to be public and sees it more as a way for me to just brag about our relationship. I love him. He's the first person I've ever loved and has been a very good friend for a long time. I feel like even if we would break up, the only way I could even get over him at all would be to cut ties with him completely. I don't want to do that and I honestly don't know what to do anymore. I don't understand what he's so afraid of. He's heavily introverted, which I do have a basic understanding of, and he comes from a family that doesn't really discuss each other's personal lives, so for the two years that I've been coming over and seeing him, his parents have never really acknowledged me much (he's still in college and living at home). I'm at my wits end. I don't know what to say anymore and I don't know what to do anymore. He isn't intentially hurting me, he just has a lot of anxiety that's running his life verses being dealt with. Does anyone have any advice other than just breaking up with him? I really don't want that to be the outcome of this...", "summary": "My boyfriend has serious social anxiety and won't acknowledge us publicly as being in a relationship. I need advice other than just \"Break up with him.\""}
{"id": "t3_4mkfon", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My coworker (30M) comes up to me (27F) and tickles me regularly. I've asked him to stop a lot and he won't.", "post": "My coworker (I'll call him Alex) is a touchy feely guy. At first I didn't mind. Now I mind a whole lot. \n\nAlex will come up to me, and a few other female coworkers, and tickle us. 95% of the time it's unexpected and I don't even know he's coming up to me. It's always on my back, back of legs/knees, arm, elbow areas- basically commonly ticklish areas. \n\nThe first few times it was funny. Then it got annoying. Then it got downright creepy. I started gently saying \"please don't do that.\" I'm not sure if Alex thought I was kidding or what?\n\nNow, even as I back away from Alex when I know he's about to do it, Alex corners me/follows so he can tickle me. No lie.\n\nEarlier this week, I said \"do not touch me, Alex.\" The next day he was tickling me again. I said don't, and Alex just continued to try and touch me and mocked the way I said don't. \n\nI'm at my wits end. I am so uncomfortable, this makes me anxious, and I am starting to get nervous just being near him. Yes, I'm starting I get scared of my coworker. I honestly don't know though - maybe he thinks I'm kidding, maybe I'm not saying don't firmly enough. What should I do?", "summary": "my coworker thinks it's fun/funny to tickle me (and other women). I've asked him to stop, and he just won't. He will mock me even. What can I do."}
{"id": "t3_48kw2t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] feel like I'm becoming less attatched/falling out of love with my girlfriend [19 F] of 6 months", "post": "Hey all,\n\nSo I am in college and have been dating a girl I met at college for about six months. This is my longest relationship thus far. \n\nWe fell pretty hard and for the first semester I spent a majority of my time with her. There was literally nothing I wanted out of college other than to spend time with her. But this semester it feels as if I just am losing interest. I feel like I'm just losing the connection that we had. Sometimes she'll be talking and I just don't have any interest in what she's saying. Today I was playing Playstation and she tried to make out with me and I had no interest at all.\n\nI also feel very drawn to other women. I'll see girls in class or whatever and wish that I could ask them out on a date or invite them out to a party. \n\nHowever, my girlfriend is such a great person. She's never wronged me and we've never been in a real argument. She's great to me and I can't think of any other reason to not be with her other than the fact that I feel less in love with her as of late. To put it in other words, I could see myself marrying her, but in this moment I don't feel like I love her.\n\nIt may also be of importance that she went through a very traumatic experience ~freshman year of hs. She is somewhat emotionally unstable and therefore needs a lot of attention. (I sleep in her bed every night.) Yet I want to spend more time with friends.\n\nSo should I leave her and explore other things or stick with her and see if I find myself having feelings for her again?", "summary": "I think that I love my gf and would totally marry her, but rn I feel like I don't really love her."}
{"id": "t3_1nc1r1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My(20/f) fiance (20/M) got out of detox yesterday and didnt call me", "post": "My fiance has been in detox for the past week due to drug use. I knew he was going to detox and I called him every day during calling hours to make sure he knew I was there for him. Thursday he and I had a minor argument which ended with him hanging up on me after calling me annoying. Me, not wanting to annoy him anymore, decided that I would wait for him to call me. He doesnt call. Today (Saturday) I'm on facebook and I see that he wrote on some other girls facebook page. The message pretty much said \"Hey, I'm clean. I want to talk. Call me\". I call him and demand to know when he got out, and why he didnt call me. He said he got out yesterday (Friday) and that he didnt have time. I think this is bullshit, obviously, because he had time to talk to her so why not me. I just don't know what to think anymore", "summary": "Fiance didnt call me after getting out of detox because he didnt have enough time, but he had enough time to talk to another girl."}
{"id": "t3_2axp16", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26F] with my husband [28 M] 3 years duration, I think I want a divorce.", "post": "We have been together for around 5 years, married for 3 of those. We started dating after I had recently broken up with another guy. I didn't really think it was going to get serious, but we continued to date. We broke up at one point for a few months, got back together, and continued to date. We've been married for 3 years and I've been unhappy for 2. The marriage feels very one sided. I put in a lot of time and effort to keep things going, and he goes along for the ride. Whenever I ask him to do very small things for me, he puts up a lot of resistance. I feel like I'm being taking advantage of and taken for granted. He is a poor communicator. I've talked to him about my dissatisfaction multiple times, but he never really took me seriously until I recently threatened to leave him. Now he says he wants to try to be better and he realizes he has not been treating me well for 3 years. I have a lot of doubts about our future. I know I should give him another chance, but I don't know if I want to. We do not share similar views on religion, politics, etc and I dislike what he has chosen to do for a living. I feel that he does not respect and value me. I feel like I have to mother him/nag to get him to be decent. I don't know what to do. I've thought a lot about leaving, but I don't know if I have good enough reason to go.", "summary": "Been married for 3 years, very dissatisified with the relationship. Husband finally realized how poorly he's been acting when I threatened to leave him. Should I stay or go?"}
{"id": "t3_16eggl", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you, as a musician, get back into playing again?", "post": "I started playing the cello in 7th grade. I was in my High School orchestra class (*mediocre at best with the type of funding we had*) throughout my entire high school schooling. I was in a chamber string quartet, and was also in the Georgia Youth Symphony Orchestra for 3 years.\n\nAs a player that is an intermediate/experienced player (*I don't like to think I'm close to professional level, though I may just be modest*), what do you suggest to help muster up the power to practice and learn new techniques on your own? I find that during my entire time in all these programs, I was never once taught how to properly study and practice on my own (excluding the material that we would be performing for at a concert). I also find it difficult to remember some basic practice challenge scales and bowing techniques, as we would lightly brush over this material at the beginning of class and mindlessly rush into what we would be performing for a concert. I feel I was never taught the fundamentals of learning to play on my own.\n\nIf you're able, list off some things that you would recommend that would help with practice and learning newer techniques on your own, such as:\n\n* Books\n* Techique sheet Music\n* Specific works of music\n* Tutors\n* Etc.", "summary": "I'm a cello player that hasn't played in a professional surrounding for about 5 years, and have been wanting to play again. Teachers didn't teach us how to play on our own. What do you suggest?"}
{"id": "t3_1xe3th", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 M] have a crush on my best friend [23 F]. Here's my plan. Is it stupid?", "post": "I'm pretty sure she's liked me for a few months.  I've sort of liked her for that long, but not significantly until recently.\n\nAnyways, my main worry is this:  She's NOT the type to cheat (I've seen her in 2 serious relationships), but she gives her heart away too easily.  She's working hard to change that, but she's only been single for 3 months... after years of constant bad relationships and rebounds.  I just don't want her to rebound on me.\n\nShe's also moving in 1 month.  It's to the region I've been planning to move to anyways, and to my #2 city choice.  So it's not THAT bad, but it means we'll be apart for 6-12 months.\n\nDating her would risk our friendship, and I want to know 2 things:\n\n* Can she stay single for a while longer?  If this means I have more competition, that's ok.\n\n* How's our friendship dynamic going to change once she moves?\n\nSo my plan is to wait until ~1 month after she moves before trying to start a relationship.  And I'll still be open to meeting other women in-between (I doubt I'll go for someone else, but if she finds another guy, I don't want to have zero options myself).\n\nBad stuff:\n\n* Missing a month of relationship time while being in the same state\n\n* Skipping V-day\n\n* She's going to think I'm not interested in her\n\nIs this a good idea?", "summary": "Waiting until AFTER my crush moves to tell her I like her... I'll get to see how the long-distance friendship is, but is it a good idea to wait?"}
{"id": "t3_3dx4wc", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to shave my shoulder while sleep-deprived.", "post": "Okay. So this happened a few minutes ago. I was sitting in my room, reading some Bukowski and shit before bed. I look up at the clock and see that it's 2 in the morning. Seeing as I have an appointment this morning, I start freaking the fuck out.\n I close my book and run into my bathroom to brush my teeth and take my contacts out. After I finish that I, being overly tired and sick, stand there for a few minutes looking at myself in the mirror forgetting what I was doing there. I then notice a bunch of black hairs on one of my shoulders. Not thinking, I grab my razor and try to shave them off. It works a little too well. It takes the hair as well as my skin with it.\n I start bleeding everywhere. It gets all on the sink and the tile while I get my heavy duty bandaids out from under the counter. I finally patch myself up but now my shoulder hurts like a motherfucker and my bathroom is a bloody mess.", "summary": "Tried to shave shoulder while sleep-deprived and rushing for appointment. Ripped skin off and bled everywhere."}
{"id": "t3_131uge", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My girlfriend [26f] has no manners and it's driving me [24m] crazy, to an extreme degree. How can I approach this?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have a fairly decent, average, relationship with about one exception. Her manners are so bad that I'm embarrassed every time we eat with friends/family and I'm starting to get frustrated even when it's just her and I to the point where I have a hard time being \"normal\" around her eating. I've also had friends/family mention it to me themselves on several occasions. \n\nI'm not a picky person by any means (at least about anything else) and in general am very tolerant of people who don't do things \"my way\" but after three years of listening to her chew with her mouth open, bite her fork/spoon when she takes a bite, play with her food, and shovel it into her mouth bit by bit I'm about at my wits end. I certainly don't expect royal manners or anything of that variety but I am slowly realizing that general manners are a must in my relationship. \n\nI know the old adage of \"just talk to her\" (we really do talk about almost everything, very open) but I have a particularly hard time, I think, because I feel like it's not my responsibility to coach her in proper social manners. It feels a bit father-like and I get the \"its not my job to teach her manners\" every time I consider talking about it. It's the details that get to me, is it best to try and train her in every nuance that makes up good manners (\"don't bite your fork, don't chew with your mouth open, don't pick at your food with your fingers\") or should I just generally say \"you need to work on your manners\" and hope that she gets it? \n\nIt's not just her eating habits, she seems to have been taught very few social manners but I thought it best to start here and see if I can figure out an easy way to approach such a topic.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I have a fairly healthy relationship but she lacks very basic manners and it's really starting to get to me. I have no idea how to successfully approach her and discuss it because I feel strange taking that role."}
{"id": "t3_1l4hkp", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "I want to make an anonymous phone call to Animal Control about a dog that belongs to my boyfriends family . . .", "post": "So my boyfriends family are pretty terrible people. His mother is a complete irresponsible mother (she's lost 2 children to the state), and my boyfriend has never had a relationship with them. She works long hours as a nurse a few hours away from her home, so she is often not at the house. My boyfriends brother is at the house, but all he does is sit around in his basement playing video games, not paying attention to his surroundings. Now, the dog that they have is a rescue dog. They adopted him a couple years ago. I've seen the state of the house when my boyfriend used to live there, and it's terrible. There is dirty laundry all over the place, dirty dishes throughout the kitchen, open paint cans laying around, and so many other terrible things. That dog craps all over the place because I believe he needs to be let outside but no one is paying the right attention to him. When he is outside, he's often tied up on a line in a muddy driveway and will often escape. The brother screams at him when he barks (probably barking because he needs attention), and the mother is never around to look after him. Overall, I'm wondering if I should make the anonymous phone call to Animal Control, and if they will actually do something about the situation. I don't think anyone hits the dog, but I don't even know how much he is fed (or if he is even fed enough). Is this enough for the dog to be taken to a better place??", "summary": "Boyfriends family don't pay attention to the dog, so he goes to the bathroom in the house and is often tied up outside. Is this enough for Animal Control to take care of?"}
{"id": "t3_3ls1ji", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "26f left self destructive, depressed, emotionally abusive and aggressive 30m", "post": "Left my partner after just not being able to take anymore, broke up recently but got back together after his claim to seek help and I agreed to support him through it.\nBeen 2 months and I am leading him begrudgingly by the hand to even read any website or phone number. Don't feel I will even be happy again despite wanting to hold onto a future with him even kids but as it stood I was terrified of that happening. I know I'm doing what's best for me and I've done all I can emotionally and physically to help this guy... so why do I feel so guilty for leaving?", "summary": "Bf was depressive and emotionally abusive. Agreed to seek help but is fighting tooth and nail. I left. Why am I feeling guilty?"}
{"id": "t3_18rgwa", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22M] Should I attempt to reestablish a friendship with Ex gf? [22F}", "post": "I've known this girl since I was 14 years old. Her and I were long time friends and finally got together almost 2 years ago. For the majority of the relationship it was great, we were both happy and no doubt in love. She was my best friend in the world... We broke up 6 months ago, her decision. A lot of strain was placed on us due to several different reasons. I didn't handle these strains well, and our relationship turned into more bad times than good ones. I was a mess for a long time after she left me, and I still miss her something terrible. \n\nI see her out every now and then, we have the same friend group. We exchange simple hellos and how are you but it never goes farther than that. I really miss her friendship, and I don't think its fair that I've lost a long time friend due to a failed romantic relationship. I knew that some time needed to pass before I could consider being her friend, and I guess she feels the same way. I know this girl cares for me, I was her closest friend for years. \n\nSo my question is this, should I give her a call and tell her I miss her and want to be her friend? I've been thinking about it for a few weeks now but am a little scared of the outcome... any advice would be appreciated.", "summary": "Close/best friends with a girl for at least 4 years, we dated for almost a year, ended on a bad note. Been 6 months since.. Should I try to reestablish a friendship with her?"}
{"id": "t3_1c4c6c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20]m fallen for a girl, the pros and cons of starting a relationship confuse me.", "post": "My girl and I are flirting with the idea of a relationship, but I have cognitive dissonance. \n\nPoint 1:\n\nI'm [20]m and I have been dating a [20]f girl for the past 3 months. I have never had a serious relationship before. I have dated a few girls. I also go out clubbing a lot. I have talked to / hooked up with a lot of girls. This is the first girl I have had a really strong attraction to that goes beyond physical. \n\nPoint 2:\n\nFrom what I've seen of friends, family, and society in general, is that throughout your life you have numerous relationships. They go through stages: flirting, dating, new relationship energy, stability, conflict, end or marriage. Even though it feels amazing now, I'm only 20, and drawing on observation any relationship will probably end. I never want to get married, I don't believe in soul mates, and I don't want to spend my entire life with one girl. So, I know this relationship will sometime in the far away future end.\n\nPoint 3:\n\nI was socially inept in high school, I worked hard hammering out social interactions for months and months ingraining a deep sense of self-belief in myself. Now I love to go out and hook up with attractive girls, its challenging and exciting.\n\nI feel like I have to pick between self-development and my love for a girl. On one hand I really like this girl, I've never had a relationship before, and she's one of the few girls I've been attracted to. On the other hand, If I'm in a relationship I can't go out and hook up with hot girls, I can't keep improving my game, and what's the point in even having a relationship when I think it will probably end eventually. Thanks for reading.", "summary": "! I've fallen for a girl, but relationships in your 20s limit you and they will probably not last, so I'm confused if I should go for it or keep playing the game because its fun."}
{"id": "t3_fe8gf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is it alright to scrutinize persons who claim ownership of pictures?", "post": "Being a Redditor, i tend to pick up links a full 24-48 hours before my friends do (read: i probably spend too much time on the internet). \nHowever, some of these friends like to take these pictures and post it on their Facebook profiles claiming ownership for the picture, or leaving an open connotation that it is possibly theirs.\n\nFor example, many of the text message logs from iPhones shore up on my friend's wall, as if he is involved in many of these text conversations themselves.\n\nI recently took action and called him out on it, but was it fair?\n\nIs it okay to rain on other people's parades and their lesser understanding of memes and other internet culture, or just sit back and pretend that they know what theyre doing.\n\nAnother somewhat aggravating situation i find myself in is people using 'trolled' incorrectly. They throw the trolling meme everywhere like its sparkly glitter, when it is obvious they are using it incorrectly. Its frustrating, but i dont want to sound condescending when i correct them.", "summary": "My friends dont understand the internet and their usage of everything incorrectly makes me mad. Am i allowed to call them out on it?"}
{"id": "t3_3mh5bc", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by brushing my teeth with surgical lube", "post": "This actually happened about 4 hours ago and my SO is still giving me hell about it. \n\nI had a list of things I had to accomplish before having to drive 4 hours to a wedding. One of those things I had planned to do was stretch my ears from a 4G to a 2G. I go to the bathroom and get out all my stuff to stretch my ears. I successfully stretch them without any hiccups and hop in the shower. At this point, we are looking at about 1 hour before we have to leave and I still had several things to do. As I'm completing these tasks, I lose track of time and have to be in the car and heading to the wedding in ~5 minutes. Shit. So my SO is starting to rush me and I'm trying to finish getting ready. Go to the bathroom to brush my teeth and about that time my SO asks me something and I turned to look at her and inadvertently picked up the tube of surgical lube that previously I used to stretch my ears and applied it to my toothbrush. I put my electric toothbrush in my mouth and turn it on and start brushing and that's when I realized it was too late. I was spitting out lube left and right and dry heaving all while my SO thinks it's the funniest thing on earth. I guess the good takeaway here is that food will slide down my gullet much easier.", "summary": "got in a hurry this morning after using surgical lube to stretch my ears, left the lube on the bathroom counter next to toothpaste, and accidentally used it to brush my teeth."}
{"id": "t3_54j4jn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my friend [20 F] of 2 years. Openly talked about dating, then I did something pretty bad.", "post": "I'm a junior in college, and is (was?) really good friends with this girl for coming on two years now. For the past... almost 11 months at this point I suppose, we've been hooking up but remaining friends in a pretty weird situation. Well, I discovered she had feelings for me, and found that as I was coming into my junior year I had developed the same for her. It seemed like somehow we were actually going to avoid a messy friends-with-benefits falling out of sorts.\n\nAnyways, she and I ended up having an open conversation about the possibility of dating. We decided that there was some stuff I had to take care of first, but we were both into the idea and agreed to be platonic friends until we would (really inevitably at this point) start dating.\n\nAnd then, a few days after that conversation, I got really, way too drunk and made out with one of our mutual friends. Hoo boy. While this mutual friend and I talked and agreed it was a stupid mistake that we didn't want to repeat, my friend (rightfully so) became very hurt. She went home for the weekend and we stopped talking, but she came back basically saying that she didn't want to cut me out of her life, but that I had really broken her trust, I would have to build that back up, and that our friendship would never really be the same.\n\nHonestly, I deserve all of it - even though it really was a stupid mistake and I would never in my right mind intend to do something like this, the fact is that I did it anyways while drunk and really did fuck up.\n\nI don't know that there's much to do from here - while I'd really still like to date this friend, I can definitely see why that possibility could be off the table forever now. I guess at this point I'd just like to know if anyone has any advice for what to do from here; I'd like to prove to her that I do really care about her and build that trust back up. I really do feel awful about this all. Anyone been in a situation like this? What did you do/what did you learn from it?", "summary": "Friend and I agreed to date in near future, I got drunk and hooked up with our mutual friend. Now my original friend is (rightly so) very hurt, and I'm feeling like a pretty bad guy. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_3q8e2g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my Ex GF (1 1/2 years) now Roommate [22 F] 3 weeks broken up, refuses to pay new rent amount.", "post": "We were splitting all costs of living (food/bills/rent/ins) on an percentage of income base. I weighted it in her favor because she liked to go out and have fun with her friends more which I didn't mind as long as she was happy.\n\nTurns out she wasn't all that happy and broke up with me. But rent is $1300/mo and rent/insurance/bills is about $1750/mo total between us. Also the lease is ridiculous and wants the equivalent of 4 months rent in fees to break it. So I laid out the ground rules and said it's now 50-50 for that amount we still share. The difference between then and now is $200 more a month for her. She says she can't pay it for the next two months because of a $500 deductible for an auto-claim she filed a few months back, which is factual.\n\nHowever, I called bullshit on her inability to pay her new share. She has horrible spending problems, so I budgeted her monthly income and showed her after all her costs of living (sans the deductible) she had about $600/mo to blow on whatever she wanted for the month. I informed her that most people, when confronted with unexpected bills, take it out of savings and then recuperate the loss over time. She didn't like that because she only has $1200 in savings and that's for her family trip to the Keys in July.\n\nI'm a part owner of her bank account and therefore have access to her checking and savings straight from my own account. I'm thinking of pulling the $100 ($200 split over her two pay periods) and letting her figure it out on her own. I'm not going to play this bullshit where she wants a break on paying rent for now, because I know she'll never get around to paying it because she already owes me $700 from when I dug her out of credit card debt when we got together 2 years ago.", "summary": "Refuses to pay new rent amount. I'm a part owner of her bank account. Should I take the money out anyway? Should I take the money she owed previously also? Is there another way?"}
{"id": "t3_3ejy3y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] think my Dad [50] is cheating on my Mum [47]. What do I do?", "post": "A while ago my Dad asked me to use the laptop to print something out for him for work. I didn't know what the website it was on was called so I just went into the history to find it there. There were a few porn sites like Pornhub, YouPorn etc there, but that didn't bother me. My Dad works nights a lot so he regularly takes the laptop with him, so I just assumed he would visit the sites then. There were also some of those \"HOT SINGLES IN YOUR AREA!!\" type things but I thought they were just some of those crappy ads that redirect you on porn sites. I deleted the history just in case it ever came up in the search box while other people were around, and I forgot about it until today. A family friend's computer is broken so she asked to come around later to use ours to print something out. I said sure, and checked the history just in case, but I found a massive list of cheating sites visited a week ago. There must have been about 11 or 12 different sited visited one after the other, sites like Ashley Madison, Easysex, along a load of others with names like \"MILFbang\" and \"Localfuck\". There's no way that this many sites could be the result of some scummy ads. I deleted the history again, but I now wish I'd at least taken a screenshot first. I k ow this must be my Dad because I don't use the laptop unless I have to do something for a family member (I use my phone for Reddit, YouTube etc), I've never seen my Mum even touch the laptop because she's even more tech illiterate than my dog, and my Sister doesn't even live with us anymore. They've been together for 28 years, and the've always seemed pretty happy to me. They were thinking about getting a divorce a about 5 years ago, but I don't know what that was about, they decided to give it another chance and they've been fine ever since. I don't know what to do, any advice would be really helpful.", "summary": "A bunch of cheating sites in the history of the laptop that only my Dad uses, I'm not sure what to do next."}
{"id": "t3_1rvdyg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] want to restore a set of old friendships [23 M/F] that fell apart for various reasons. Is it worth it? How can I do it?", "post": "Back in high school, I was in a fairly tight-knight group of friends. We were nearly inseparable until about two years ago when things kind of hit the fan. Basically, my ex started dating one of my close friends in this group. I didn't really care very much but she decided she wanted nothing to do with me and refused to be in my presence, so as they started hanging out more with my other friends, I started seeing them less and less.\n\nSo people took sides and about half of my friends at that time stuck with me and the other half stuck with them. It wasn't really a conflict, just that she wouldn't see me and it kind of created a rift. Now, they've broken up; in fact, there's been pretty much a full turnover of romantic relationships on their side of things, and I want to try and rebuild bridges. I feel the bridges weren't burned so much as abandoned and neglected.\n\nBut I don't know how to do this. It's been two years and I've had very little contact with them. I miss them sorely and want to hang out with them again. How do I do it? Should I even try?", "summary": "Old, close friendships fell apart for silly reasons two years ago, don't know how/if I should get them back together"}
{"id": "t3_1dpq5w", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [17/m] stopped talking to my friend [17/f] that I have feelings for. Did I do the right thing?", "post": "I've known this girl for about two years now and have always had feelings for her. Two years ago I told her the way I felt about her and she told me she didn't reciprocate and I was okay with it at the time because she was pretty nice about it. After that for a few months she would become increasingly flirty so I thought maybe she liked me now but after a while I realised she was just leading me on. I decided to stop talking to her because the way she was treating me was pretty toxic to me. \n\nNow that was two years ago and every once in a while she will say hi to me (never me initiating conversation) and we would talk but then she would resume flirting with me and leading me on when I knew she had no interest in me so I would stop conversation again. I knew she had no interest in me because I saw her doing the same thing to quite a few other guys. \n\nFew weeks ago she started talking to me again and this time her flirting and what not increased by a lot (inviting me to her house and other things). My friend then told me that during the whole time she was flirting with me over the years she was actually in a relationship on and off with one of my friends who introduced me to her and was giving me advice during the whole time. I decided to stop talking to her because she wasn't worth the effort but she has always been a good friend to me. Did I do the right thing?", "summary": "Girl I know keeps leading me on even though I know she has no interest in me and I stopped talking to her to save myself from her idiocy."}
{"id": "t3_4lngxm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it unfair to other women if I [22M] want to date but (possibly) still love my ex [24F]?", "post": "Throwaway for the usual reasons.\n\nMy ex and I had been together 3 years but split about two months ago, not because of a huge fight, but just a few fundamental incompatibilities and situational obstacles (we didn't have similar future plans; we've been doing long distance for a while; ex was really insecure; I didn't know how to handle my jealousy, etc.) That being said, she's wonderful, one of the sweetest and funniest people I know, and sometimes I still feel quite sad about it. \n   \n\nMy friends have suggested going out with other people to try to move on, and I think that's a good idea. I'm even excited at the idea of dating again. However, my ex and I still talk frequently, sometimes on the phone for several hours. She has admitted she has lingering feelings as well, but also agrees that we just weren't cut out to be a couple. We don't have hard feelings, so I'm reluctant to cut off our friendship. At the same time, I don't really want to introduce myself to dates by saying, \"By the way, I'm still close to my ex and I miss her. I'm trying to move on, which is why I'm considering dating you right now.\" But I don't want to lie, either.", "summary": "I'd like to move on from my ex by going out on other dates, but I still have residual feelings for her and talk to her often. How honest should I be with new women? Is the situation fair to them?"}
{"id": "t3_54hmuq", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "An unwanted gift from my SO [20F] - I need so[M20]e help", "post": "Okay, so I feel so bad about this. \nIn November me and my SO will celebrate our 1 year anniversary, and of course we said that we'll gift one another \"nothing\" and of course we both knew it's a lie.\n\nSo, I just discovered what her \"nothing\" is, and this is why I feel bad. She know's i like computers and when I first built my PC I didn't buy any graphics card, and I of course did tell her that (several times..anytime we (mostly me) talked about computers..I'm an idiot) and now she wants to buy me a new graphics card. The thing is I'm an university student and the last time I played video games was like 2 months ago, and I have little to no time to go to the beach and enjoy while it still lasts, not to mention playing on PC. \n\nSo all this wouldn't be a problem if I didn't discovered it, but the thing is expensive and I'd rather go in some city in Europe we didn't visit. Since it's expensive she's asked help from two of my friends (both students; but one too kind to refuse to help) and my parents (they have their financial problems of their own). Knowing her, even if no one would help her, she's going to buy it just to make me happy, but I don't need it right now and as I said earlier there are so many other things that I'd spend money on. \n\nWhat I did is to tell her that I want to take her somewhere South (in Europe) and, subtly, told her that any dime will matter and that I wouldn't want her to spend money on something materialistic, but rather invest it in our trip. She agreed, but! she also said that she put heart in choosing her \"nothing\" and that she's willing in doing both. I also sought the help of a friend (one she contacted and said he's broke) and told him to call her and subtly tell her that it'll be better to go somewhere to spend time together. \n\nPlease, help me understand why won't she give up and maybe how to convince her to chose something else.\n\nThank you!", "summary": "Girlfriend wants to gift me with a new graphics card; I prefere going to a trip. How do I convince her to do this ?"}
{"id": "t3_4ectz5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend [25m] dumped me after cheating but I still feel bad for trying to date other guys? [24f]", "post": "My boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me because he didn't want a relationship anymore. He cheated on me 2 months ago and we agreed to work things out but it failed. \n\nI was upset and turned to Tinder for a quick confidence boost. He texts me saying he knows I'm on Tinder. (His friend must have seen me and texted it to him) I still love him so much and I know we shouldn't be together because he's completely disrespected me and strung me along. He was my best friend and I feel bad if he's upset/hurt that I'm on Tinder. How do I get past this guilt? He's the one that broke up with me for fuck sakes!", "summary": "Dumped after being cheated on. Ex found out I was on Tinder and seems upset. I'm upset that he's upset. How to get past guilt?"}
{"id": "t3_3pje30", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20F] always cry when my feelings get hurt and my boyfriend [20M] and I communicate about it", "post": "Our relationship is fantastic. Sometimes, like in all relationships, there's a miscommunication, or we get short with one another out of stress. Nearly always we recognize when we're being unfair, there's an immediate apology, and everything is fine. However, when it's a problem over text or something else intercedes and I have to bring it up after, I always start crying when I explain that my feelings were hurt. It's not even because I feel so bad about the event itself, and I completely understand in the moment that it's a miscommunication and that we love each other and wouldn't want to hurt each other-- it's more like I feel bad for feeling bad. I usually just do this kind of ridiculous thing where I assure him it's not bad enough to cry about, and I can't control it, as I'm tearing up (not sobbing).", "summary": "I don't want to be unintentionally emotionally manipulative when I communicate my perspective after my feelings are hurt. How can I stop the tears?"}
{"id": "t3_3c0b5u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [28 M] heart is cooking my brain.", "post": "Full disclosure: I stole the title of this post from a Modest Mouse song.\n\nBackground: I had relationship end at the beginning of this year (got dumped). I have been dating a fair amount recently, exclusively through apps like Tinder, OKcupid, and Hinge (meeting people to date in person is quite difficult, as I'm sure many of you know). I dated one person for about a month, but then broke it off with her, as she made some really inappropriate comments to me that raised some red flags.\n\nOther than that, I have not been on any second dates, by my own choosing. In my experience, internet dating (when you're looking for something beyond hooking up) is incredibly inefficient and mentally taxing. I just haven't been interested in hanging out with my dates a second time, mostly due to feeling a lack of connection on my end, though I'm sure the feeling was mutual for some of the dates.\n\nLo and behold, I finally meet someone in person who I am incredibly interested in, and she's taken. I don't know how long she has been dating her boyfriend, but it's off limits as far as I'm  concerned. I *do* think she has a little crush on me as well (have caught furtive glances from her, we make each other laugh frequently), and that if she was single, I would have a chance to date her.\n\nMy emotions are running wild - I am incredibly bummed out that I won't have a chance to get to know her better and hang out one on one, and I don't think I have the patience to go back to online dating, for the time being.\n\nI should disclose that many of my friends say that I'm too picky when it comes to relationships. Part of me thinks that's a good thing, part of me thinks they are right and that I'll never meet someone due to my high standards.\n\nI'm sure many have been in this situation before. Does anyone have advice on how to overcome this kind of heartache?", "summary": "I am crushing hard on a girl, which is a rare circumstance for me, but she is unavailable. How do I move on effectively, when it is so rare for me to meet a person that I am into this much?"}
{"id": "t3_jz0jh", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Need your help with a work dilemma!", "post": "I work for a smallish Web Development company (>50 employees). A while ago we built a free site for a retail company. For the sake of this throwaway, let's say they make those plastic garden flamingos. We built them a medium-sized website with built in content management system, and in exchange they gave us about 50 plastic garden flamingos as payment.\n\nFor one reason or another, they weren't happy with us (mainly the way their project was managed, rather than the quality of the output) and chose to part ways with our company after we finished building the site and put it live. They have since been working with another company, but have also found them to be unsatisfactory.\n\nHere lies the issue - I have received an email directly to me (although through my work email since that is the only contact info they have) asking if I would be willing to do some work for them independently on an ad-hoc basis. They basically want me to provide them with a tutorial and do some basic feature work on the site, presumably possibly leading to more work when they want things done.\n\nI have consulted my contract and the only stuff I can find relating to this type of thing applies to after you've been terminated. As in \"For up to 6 months after you have been terminated you must not solicit or attempt to entice away any clients...\" blah blah.\n\nWhat I want to know is - would it be wrong of me to take this company up on their offer and do work for them? Would you describe it as unethical?", "summary": "A client my company built a free(sorta) website for has asked me to independently do some work for them. Is it wrong/unethical for me to do it?"}
{"id": "t3_1jwkl2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23M] boyfriend broke up with me [23F] after a year because he doesn't love me and i don't know how to handle it", "post": "Ill try and keep this short. My boyfriend and I have been going out for a little over a year and everything seemed great. We had a lot of the same interests, humor, and a lot of the same friends. During we were both very affectionate and goofy and people always commented on how good we are together. Basically we were a healthy fun loving couple. \n\nRecently though i have noticed a little bit of hesitance on his part and felt him pulling away a little. I thought he would bring it up and talk to me about it but no. The one conversation we have ever had about his feelings is him breaking up with me. \n\nHe said i was a perfect girlfriend and all he can ask for but he just knows he doesn't love me and feels bad because he doesn't think things can go to the next level (which i presume he meant moving in together) \n\nThis came so out of the blue. We even went out to eat before and acted like everything was fine - which makes me feel so stupid. I was talking to him planning things for next week and holding his hand and just acting normal. \n\nI dont know how to handle it, im in complete shock and i cant stop crying. I just feels so rejected and that i did something wrong in the relationship. \n\nIm being smart about the break up and not calling him and keeping my space but im a wreck and i dont have the first clue how to get out of this. \n\nAny help would be greatly appreciated. I dont have a lot of friends and i dont want to be that friend who just talks about the break up all the time either because we have mutual friends.", "summary": "boyfriend of a year broke up with me out of the blue saying he doesnt love me anymore and i dont know to deal"}
{"id": "t3_1zg7fo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My husband's (M34) refusal to quit smoking is starting to make me (F30) resent him.", "post": "My husband and I both smoked when we first got together but once I became pregnant with our first child, 7 years into our relationship we agreed we'd both quit smoking. I quit immediately but of course I had a little more incentive, so I was super supportive and did everything I could to help him quit but once our son was born premature and needed oxygen to survive for the first 3 months of his life I became less supportive and more insistent that he quit. \n\nThat was 4 years ago, and now we are completely broke, as in we run out of food and I have to feed our 2 children Ramen noodles and hot dog buns for lunch, cancer runs rampant through his family tree and yet he still smokes.\n\n What makes it unbearable is he lies to me about it all the time. Our phones have been turned off, we no longer have cable and my family had to pay our rent last December so I demanded he quit (I gave up soda, and beer) or I would leave and so finally he did.\nAt least that's what he told me, for two months I was so proud of him and bragging about and to him, until a neighbor came over to bum a smoke and that's how I found out he was still smoking. So not only is he spending the very little money we have on cigarettes, but he lies about it to my face constantly. I've actually caught him in so many lies some of which are just ridiculous (I found some invitations to our youngest son's 1st birthday party he said he mailed off) that I just don't trust him any more and that breaks my heart. We've been best friends for 12 years and now it feels like I don't even know him anymore. Some times I don't even like him, and I get more and more resentful and bitter the more he lies and makes false promises. \n\nThere's a lot more that's goes into our problems but this is our biggest one, from which many of the smaller problems branch out from. Am I over reacting? Is there anything I can do?\n\ns.", "summary": "We're broke with kids, my husband won't quit smoking and lying which makes me want to leave an otherwise good man."}
{"id": "t3_2pa040", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [24F] was sexually assaulted by a senior colleague [50ishM] and doesn't want to do anything about it", "post": "I'm not sure if this is the correct place to post this but here goes. A little background, we live in the UK, my GF lives in a different city to me due to our work, and 3 months ago started working at a new post. What I'm about to write is what I've heard from her.\n\nShe went out for a Christmas party with work colleagues and as usual involved dinner and drinks/clubbing. At the end of the night she and her senior (A), who has a higher position, married with children, offered to walk her home. She agreed as she was a bit drunk at this point.\n\nPrevious to this she has talked about A as a mentor who has guided her through the new job an given her some good career guidance. Needless to say she trusted him as a friend.\n\nAnyway, once they were at her home he started making very aggressive advances including trying to remove her dress, kissing her & inappropriate touching. All the while she was saying 'Stop, this isn't right, you have a wife' etc. She made it quite clear about this. He continued and at one point he had removed his pants and was trying to get her to perform oral sex on him. Again she refused and he left shortly after. \n\nShe is extremely upset about this and doesn't want to report it to HR or the police as she doesn't want to relive it and would rather forget about it and try to move on, she believes this will give her closure. I can completely understand but to me the situation is much worse then she is giving off and this needs to be reported to their HR department at the very least.\n\nSince the night occurred she has only told a couple of friends (who do not know A) and me. One friend has told her not to do anything about it and says things like this happens, to me this is completely the wrong thing to say and trivialises the situation. \n\nAt the moment she is very upset and angry, (as am I, I feel by not being there I can't do anything) and would rather forget about what happened. I'm looking for a little guidance as to what I can do for her. Thanks.", "summary": "GF was sexually assaulted by a colleague after a night out and is too upset/doesn't want to escalate it with the police/HR whereas I feel it needs to be."}
{"id": "t3_1t2dc7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] suddenly getting cold feet in starting a new relationship", "post": "So last year there was this guy I liked who a) had a girlfriend and b) I was just friends with through sports. Basically, I didn't ever expect anything to happen. \nTowards the end of the school year he and his gf broke up and then over the summer he started texting me a lot and then we went out once or twice. Nothing ever happened (maybe an occasional hug, no kissing or anything), we would just talk and flirt and go out a lot. So that went on for about six months and then I guess...I don't know I just didn't like him anymore I suppose. Suddenly, the idea of being in a potential relationship (cause at this point it still wasn't defined) with him just wasn't as appealing anymore. Basically, it was something I really wanted until all of a sudden it just wasn't. So basically, what is wrong with me/what caused it?", "summary": "Liked a guy for a long time and thought I wanted a relationship with him until real suddenly I didn't. Cause?"}
{"id": "t3_1g24hn", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Met a girl I like at a party.", "post": "Hi I am a 16 year old boy and I am from the Netherlands. And I got invited to a party from a good friend of mine. No I diddent puked all over the party or said random drunk stuff (for what I can remeber). But I got my eye fallen on a girl at the party, she was kinde good looking and verry sweet for what I noticed. But later at the party she went aloone outside for some air, so I thougt I'll join her and see if we could talk together. But wen I sat down next to her she went inside for a drink. Me sitting there trying to look for my phone what was in-side. So wen she stood up for a drink I stood up to take my phone from in-saide, after I took it I was hadding back outside to sit with her again. But wen I just turned around I got calld by the guys at the party to join a game.\n\n**So my problem is this:** I think I like that girl but we never realy spoken alone, still I think there was a spark from both sides. But I can't realy be sure about this becaus I have some (just some) dark spots in my memorie. Should I tell her I thougt we had some kinde of a spark. or just starting fresh about what she found of the party and suge and take it slowly to the point of getting to know her better.", "summary": "Was at a party, had some drinks, met a girl I think we had both kinde a a chemestry together, not sure if I need to mention this and how I need to start talking to her."}
{"id": "t3_49332l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my EX [33F] of 2 years. Cheated on. One year on I'm struggling to bounce back and shed the jaded view of women.", "post": "Sorry for the throwaway- keeping it private. \n\nI broke up with my ex last year, caught her cheating. This is after looking after her during cancer and doing everything i could to help her. I am now convinced shes got BPD. \n\nI'm starting to date again, but I'm struggling. I'm either Jaded and wary of women playing games/ being untrustworthyor I take it hard when someone i like isn't that interested after a couple of dates. \n\nCan you guys/girls help? How do i get past this and live my life again? I'm done letting that wh*re ruin my future.", "summary": "Broke up with my ex last year. Caught her cheating. Can't seem to get rid of my jaded view of women and dating. Help please?"}
{"id": "t3_22x013", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my boyfriend [22 M] of 7 months, I don't think we should get drunk anymore.", "post": "So when we get drunk together, we argue and we ruin each other's nights being too drunk. We also do the generally stupid stuff that everyone does when they're drunk, like getting lost/losing things/sending stupid texts/acting like a twat. So we decided to stop getting drunk when we go on nights out together, and just have a couple of light drinks. \n\nMy boyfriend is fine with this idea, however he wants to be able to go out with his friends and get wankered. He says that it should be fine because we can't argue if we're not together that night, so he can drink as much as he likes. My problem with this is that it makes me trust him less. I've always been of the opinion that you can never 100% trust anyone, because people are unpredictable and they can't even trust themselves, even when they're sober. I've heard way too many stories of people having partners that they love and then doing something stupid because they were drunk and regretting it forever. \n\nI think it's much better for our relationship and for us as people if we just don't get absolutely intoxicated, when the fuck has that ever helped anybody?! It only ever causes trouble. If you can't have fun without getting fucked off alcohol and drugs then you're going out with the wrong people or you're a boring person.\n\nIt's a simple request, no hard drugs and not getting absolutely intoxicated to the point where you can't remember parts of the night. Yet he is so against agreeing to it and I don't know what to do.\n\nAm I being unreasonable?", "summary": "I want me and my boyfriend to stop getting really drunk but he wants to continue to get wankered on nights out with his friends."}
{"id": "t3_2l7c8v", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by drinking a copious amount of alcohol and not hiding my keys", "post": "TIFU: So on Saturday I decided it was a good idea to blow off some steam. Work and school beat my ass down the previous week and to maintain some semblance of sanity, I drove to meet some friends at a bar some thirty minutes from my apartment. Saturday was DST and that led to an entire extra hour of drinking - which in hindsight was problematic - but I had a fun time at the bars we visited. Got back to my friend's place and left without saying more than a couple words. I have a tendency to want to walk and wander whenever I drink, and Saturday was no exception. Except I also decided I wanted a bed to sleep in after walking around the downtown area for twenty minutes so I decided to drive home. From what I remember during the drive home, I managed to fall asleep at the wheel, hit a guard rail, complete shred my front right tire, and then proceed to drive through the campus of the University I attend and then park in a nearby parking lot of an establishment. I drove maybe four or five miles with only three tires. How I didn't get pulled over, or how I'm alive, or how I didn't absolute destroy my car is all a mystery to me, but damn if I didn't learn a lesson.", "summary": "I got over-served at the bar, attempted to drive home, woke up in a parking lot the next morning without a front right tire. Realized I'm a big, stupid idiot."}
{"id": "t3_160cvp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hair Stylists of Reddit: Was there ever a time in your career that a customer was dissatisfied with their haircut/dye job and freaked out? If so, how did you deal with the situation?", "post": "I am always scared to go to the hair salon to get even a trim. I have been growing out my hair for about 4 years now and want it to be super long. One time I went to the stylist to get a trim and he cut it into this weird \"v\" shape without my permission (every trim I got was always a straight across trim). He was taking an unusually long time but I didn't really notice what he was doing because I didn't have my glasses on. I thought he was just being really careful because I have long hair. When he was done, I put my spectacles back on and was shocked at what a shitty job he did. I should have said something to him but I was in too much shock. I didn't tip him and went to another salon begging someone there to fix the damage. I ended up losing another 4 inches to get my hair back the way I wanted. This sounds very vain but I was so devostated. I spent a long ass time trying to grow out my hair only to chop off so much of what I spent growing.\n\nI never went back to the shitty salon. I knew I should've said something but I was just so shocked.", "summary": "Got a shitty haircut, was passive aggressive and went somewhere else to fix it, lost more hair than I wanted, never went back to the shitty salon."}
{"id": "t3_2pm0ax", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Vanguard Index Funds vs Target Retirement Account", "post": "As a recently graduated twentysome I have only a limited grasp of investing for the future/retirement. After perusing /r/personalfinance I've determined that I want to use Vanguard as my brokerage account.\n\nMy father recommended the use of index funds as they offer a lower expense rate than actively managed funds and advised against a target retirement fund since their expense ratios are generally higher. I would be opening a Roth IRA for the account.\n\nThat being said, if my research is on point, the Vanguard Target Retirement fund for my age group is made up of a % of holdings in different index funds which are domestic & international stock and bond funds. The main difference between buying into individual index funds and the Vanguard TRF, besides the minimum 10k vs 1k investment, is a .04% expense ratio.\n   \nAs someone who only has a few thousand dollars to put away, would it be in my best interest to buy into the TRF at say 1k-2k and put money away monthly, since it's encompassed by index funds, or wait till I have a solid job/career that allows me to have a lot more freedom in my investing.", "summary": "Not broke college graduate looking to start investing. Wait till I have enough money to invest simply in index funds, or invest now into a managed Target Retirement Fund?"}
{"id": "t3_201va7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (27F) boyfriend (27M) asked his ex to meet up while I'm away....", "post": "My bf has a long history with this girl. They've known each other since high school and have dated/hooked up on and off since then. They talk frequently, and she's been known to admit still having feelings for him (several times). \n\nWe've talked about this, and I've insisted that he set clear boundaries with her and explain that her sentiments aren't appropriate while he's in a relationship. We still have had problems, but they've gotten better. \n\nFast forward to \"today\": I'm planning on going on vacation with my best friend for a few days. Just hanging out with her and our kids and catching up. He's not thrilled that I'm leaving him on his own, but he'll manage...maybe spend some time with his friends. All's fine and dandy until I see that he's texted his ex, asking her if she's going to be around when I'm gone. \n\nI am, as you can probably guess, NOT happy about this. I think it's a real \"dick\" thing to do and, frankly, I don't care if they're now \"just friends\". She's told him she still loves him and misses him several times over the last year and has even said that she believes they'll get back together. He doesn't know that I know he texted her, and while I do seriously doubt they'd meet up when I'm gone, I feel like he's stabbed me in the back. \n\nHe was supposed to lessen the number of times he talks to her (not happening), and was supposed to set clear boundaries with her since they're both in live-in relationships. So...what the fuck am I supposed to do?", "summary": "Boyfriend of 1+ years texted ex asking if she'll be in town when I'm on \"vacation\". She's made it clear she still loves him/wants him back. WTF?"}
{"id": "t3_1gxqsc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I(26m) don't feel comfortable with everything being in my GF's(24f) name. Should I?", "post": "Me and my girlfriend are moving into a house. Currently we are having to purchase appliances and furniture. Well because of our distance my girlfriend goes looking with this stuff without me. So far, at the rate we are going, everything--even the house--will be in her name and I will be paying for her appliances, furniture, and house with her. \n\nNow, I know I love the girl, and we have been together for a while, but I feel I should still need some form of a safety net. Am I wrong for wanting is? I have mentioned this before and I am met with the same old, \"what, do you not love/trust me?\" \n\nIt's hard to not think of an underlying motive or possible future risk when she has reluctancy of anything being in my name, or me shopping and buying on my own, where she is completely fine if she did the same herself.", "summary": "GF's is getting everything in her name, I am helping with payments, I don't feel comfortable with that. Is that wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_138r3m", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I want to help my friend [m/46] find a date, but I [m/21] know nothing about dating older women", "post": "Title says it all.  He's in a masters program to further his career while I'm a senior and we are working in a group project together.  The first thing that stood out about him is that he is very energized for someone his age and I correctly assumed he had no kids.  When we chat about topics outside of the project he has a lot of sage advice about anything you may ask him.  He is very perceptive and can read people quite well and is a genuinely friendly person and is always honest (which he admits will get him into trouble with some people).  He is well traveled and has had his fair share of adventures and really seems to know how to enjoy life.  He is an excellent cook and says most women he starts dating gain 10 pounds as a result.\n\nHe believes his disadvantage in dating is that he's short and balding (he has a great sense of humor about it).  Besides that he's in great shape and a very smart guy.  He goes to speed dating events but for him that doesn't work well. 4 minutes is never enough to really get to know someone well enough and he cares more about having someone he can be himself around.  But what do I know about finding him a date?  I'm only 21 years old and I've never really been in a relationship myself.  I asked him if he goes to interest sites to meet people where the personality means much more, but he doesn't seem to.  He only mentioned considering such sites (and named reddit :D) but he is quite busy with work and school that I doubt he would want the distraction (you ALL know what I mean).  \n\nHow do I help him out?", "summary": "Friend is a well composed man old enough to be my father, he can't meet anyone he feels he can be himself around."}
{"id": "t3_3j074e", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by walking into a sex shop", "post": "Well, this story happened about 3 years ago when I was just a 13 year old who was really into gaming at the time. Anyways my brother wanted to take my mom to a hair saloon and there was Newbury Comics upstairs and being the geeky kid I was I told my mom and my brother I would be buying game. Now I had not seen the saloon but all I knew was that it was downstairs. I had picked out  Fallout 3(A bigger fuck up was that I didn't buy GOTY edition) and my brother bought it for me and told me come downstairs after I was done exploring the Newbury Comics. I had enough and decided to go downstairs to see if we were going home, so I could play the masterpiece of the game that is Fallout. Now, I had gotten down the stairs and went inside to a store without reading the sign. I walked in and the woman at the counter told \"Hey , you can't be in here.\" A bunch of people had started staring at me while I was at the doorway and had seen everything including the sex toys and all of the other adult stuff. I left and looked at the sign and turns right I had to go downstairs and take a right to the saloon. I saw my mom and just sat down and hid somewhere and began reading the survival guide that came with Fallout 3.", "summary": "Bought just Fallout 3 and GOTY version of it, walked into a sex shop and hid away while reading the survival guide in shame."}
{"id": "t3_1s95ja", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[21m] and my ex[20f] after 3 years broke up and 4 months later I'm presented with the chance to get back with her. I don't know if its the right thing.", "post": "**Background**\n\n**-Okay** so in August she and I were having difficulties because we didn't get to see each other as much as we usually do due to our jobs as RAs. She thought a break from each other would help both of us. I pleaded her not to and I asked for her back every day for 2 weeks. When she asked me to come see her I was pretty hurt and not sure if i wanted to get back with her since she put me through that. So I go to her dorm and sitting in her room was one of the guys that was trying to make a move on her. I thought for the worst so instead of freaking out I left. I went to my truck and sent her a long angry text (big mistake) and she was so hurt that she slept with another guy out of spite. We both regret what happened and 2 months later we try to get back together again but we had to break up with the people we were with. I broke up with a girl that was distant relationship wise and  for her it was that piece of shit that she slept with. When we were together I didn't feel the same so I told her that maybe it as best for us to break it off. Its been a huge mess\n\n**Now**\n\n**-She** is sorry for what she did but I'm not sure if getting back with her is the best idea... I will be leaving to the military and due to the long times I'll be away I'm not sure she would be able to wait for me, I do not want to be married right now so I can't bring her with me. I would love to be back in love, having sex and having my best friend as my lover again. She was supportive throughout our relationship but I do not want to deal with the manipulation, the clingyness and the disappointment from my friends.\n\n**P.S.** This was my first serious relationship. She was my first love.", "summary": "Presented with chance to get back with ex, need guidance. I have looked online and have seen pros and cons to both decisions."}
{"id": "t3_33ggqw", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I'm a bit weirded out by the \"symptoms\" I've been having lately. Is it chronic?", "post": "I have these problem lately it's like a illness or something, i couldnt find out what it is from google. \n\nSo heres the thing, I sometimes fall to this dreamlike feeling randomly while awake and when I'm concious again I will feel clueless the place im at, the person im with and even sometimes question who i am although moment later everything will fall back to place and turns to normal. It always happens during i was talking to someone and maybe some of the words may have phased this condition, but so far I couldnt confirm. \n\nIt started happening early last month, march 2015. I am worried it will get worst then what it is now, I might just forget everything without prior notice. \n\nCould someone point me to a direction of what it is? Help me out here doctors of reddit. :(\n\n*few more info about me for diagnosis purpose : I have irregular sleeping pattern, college. I smoke pot weekly. No emotional breakdown, still have mom. I smoke cigs.", "summary": "I have an illness of forgetting everything for a moment before everything start coming back while im awake. Clueless what it is. Need help."}
{"id": "t3_qp71p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I make genuine friends?", "post": "I moved to a new state with my family. I'm in my 20's and I'm having a problem. I can't seem to meet the right people. \n\nMy old friends where I previously lived are all moving on. They're still good friends to me but the distance does takes it's toll on how much we keep in touch.\n\nI have acquaintances such as people at the gym I spot or get spots from and class mates at uni. \n\nBut I always have it in my subconscious that those acquaintances won't be anything more than that.  \n\nI think it's because all the friendships I've attempted to create either failed or it felt like I was intruding on already established friendships.\n\nI don't know I guess I'm weird? Really sorry if this is in the wrong subreddit. I was going to post it in /Relationship or /Foreveralone ...but I'm not depressed, alone or in need of relationship advice. I'm just really stumped how to form a genuine friendship. ><", "summary": "I'm not depressed, living in a new state and finding it hard to make new friends to replace my old ones."}
{"id": "t3_363wpl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Read my(24m) SOs (24f) suspicious text.", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nSo yesterday night I was playin games on her phone and then she got a text from a mutual friend. I told her and then just asked me to reply to her. When I did, I notice there was a text from her Exs sister with a buncha exclamation marks. Curiosity got the wter of me and I read it.\n\nBasically went like this.\nSister: we shoul hang out ! Omg I miss you! \nSO: omg me too! I was going to your neighborhood but I forgot my key in your Bros car ( her ex). I'm actually meeting a friend in a bit (referring to me) \nSuster: wait you guys got back together or what? \nSO: haha nahh lmao or what! Ttyl\n\nI was gutted as soon as I read that. Earlier that day She said she was waitin for her friend, a coworker, to drop off her key. Why was her key in his car ? I can only assume the worse.\n\nReddit, should I confront her now about this? I was thinkin I should restore her deleted msgs without sayin anything about this so I don't jump to conclusions. I want to be 100% on this.", "summary": "SO sent/ received weird text and now I'm wondering If I should confront her or gather more I formation before confronting her."}
{"id": "t3_3vs1k0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21F) prefer being a \"mom\" to my boyfriend (21M) rather than a girlfriend.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together 3 years.  We're living together but only temporarily.  I move back to the college dorms in January.  \n\nI've really liked living with him.  This place has a kitchen, so we cook our own food rather than eating at the dining hall.  Rather, I cook the food.  I get a lot out of making him breakfast in the morning and leaving it on his nighttable while he sleeps, or tidying up his room while he's out.  I don't really do it much in front of him because it makes him feel like he's in debt.  I've told him over and over that it isn't the case.  I actually really enjoy this sort of thing.\n\nThinking about moving back to the dorms and back with other roommates (none of whom I know) has been a bit depressing for me.  But honestly, the thing I'm going to miss most is taking care of my boyfriend the way I have been these past few months.  I've really liked this 'mom' role, much more than being a 'girlfriend'.  We always argue about sex, and we always argue about going on dates, but it's not like we argue because he doesn't like the food I've cooked.  Being a mom in this case is stress-free, while in the other cases feelings and emotions are always in play.  I just don't know if I'm going to cope well with going back to how our relationship used to be.\n\nI'd like to talk about this with him, and I have tried to several times, but the conversation never really ends up being fruitful, so I'd like some advice from you more experienced individuals.", "summary": "I prefer being a mom to my boyfriend rather than a girlfriend, but the mom time is coming to an end and I'm worrying a bit."}
{"id": "t3_3k1jdr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my ex-gf of 2.5 yrs [20 F] just broke up with her, don't know how to cope [update]", "post": "Just broke up officially with my girlfriend after being on a break for a few days so I could think things over.\n\nLots of details in there so you don't have to read but I did decide that it was best that I broke up with her, as bad times outweighed the good and there were certain things that happened between us that I couldn't get over. \n\nI can't help but think I made the wrong decision. We had two minor break ups before and I kept missing her, thinking about all the good times, and ended up getting back with her just to have more bad times then good again. Nothing changed. I don't want to have it happen again but I'm worried I will cave if she tries to contact me. She didn't take the break up well but after explaining how I felt about me being resentful, not being happy, and me needing to focus on myself, she kind of understood but was still very upset. We both apologized to each other and I wished the best for her before blocking her number.\n\nI just feel so upset, like half of me is missing.. how do I cope with this?", "summary": "Broke up with GF and need to cope, don't want to be weak and get back with her because it'll end up with me being unhappy again"}
{"id": "t3_stjz0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Any advice on office organization?", "post": "Here's the situation:  my dad runs his own neuropsych practice out of a small office.  He rarely sees patients and my parents are the only employees, so cleanliness and organization in the office space has never been a priority.  However, after years of leaving piles of journal publications and research documents on the floor, on top of filing cabinets, on top of every table, etc., it's gotten out of control.  It's a huge issue, but my dad claims that he doesn't have time to deal cleaning everything up.\n\nI'm going home for a few weeks and thought I could help fix this mess.  Does anyone have advice/tricks on how to start the organization process or what some good end goals would be?\n\nIn short, I'm looking for a way to organize and store a ton of papers in an office with limited space and full filing cabinets.  I could easily digitize the information, but it would be best to keep hard copies too.", "summary": "I need to help organize an office with tons of paperes, articles, journals, etc. piled up everywhere across multiple rooms.  Any advice on getting started?"}
{"id": "t3_419ojb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[23/m] Should I let my girlfriend (22/f) of 4 years sleep with another guy?", "post": "My girlfriend was still a virgin when I met her. I already had some experience. Now we are looking to live together and eventually get married. \n\nI would like to have a longlasting and healthy relationship with her. But knowing she has no prior experience, I wonder if it would be a good thing that she -when she wants to- explore different things. I'd be open to a month with nu contact whatsoever and for her to do anything she wants (including sex with an other man). The reason for it so she can experience a different way of living. I want her to be sure about us, the way she's going to buid her life around us without her doubting our relationship years down the road and questening her dedication to me. \n\nI talked about this with my girlfriend. She doesn't want to have sex with other men. Having a month to herself isn't something she needs either, but she's up for it to see how that is like. I told her I'd like to hear it when she changes her mind about other men. \n\nSo my question, what if she changes her mind? Should I even consider this? Should this be a no go? Am I being too open?", "summary": "Should I let my girlfriend have sex with another man so she can experience what that is like so she won't ever be curious about it and that can potentially hurt our future relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_39uo4t", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Guy [25/m] I've been dating for a few months doesn't see a future with me [25/f]", "post": "Met this guy a couple of months ago, however at the time, I didn't really want a relationship but decided to go along with it for fun as he was a really nice guy. It's been a rough couple of months for me in my personal life and I haven't felt comfortable sharing things due to my past serious relationship and getting very hurt from it. We were on holiday a couple of weeks ago and everything seemed to be fine, however this week he went to a party and met a girl who he has been messaging. Now he tells me that he doesn't see a future with me. I am at the stage where I honestly could fall in love with him but I feel I need to hold back because of past experiences and I was under the impression he was moving to Germany in a couple of months from the US and this was just a couple of months of fun. I'm not sure how to let him in, I really want to but I see no point if it's not going to work out? Also, his lack of communication whilst we have been dating has been an issue for me as he can go a couple of days with no communication. Any advice if I should dump him or let him in?", "summary": "past experiences and my personal life possibly pushing away a future relationship due to my fear of a serious relationship, despite wanting one"}
{"id": "t3_1s9cvy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I, 19-M college freshman, met girl during first few weeks, saw her briefly this week and not sure how to make contact.", "post": "So in August I started college, the first few weeks involved all those standard introductionary acitivities. During one of those I met a girl that i instantly took interest in. Later that week we hung out all evening during another activity. I had a great time and think she did aswell. The night ended quite quickly however, I didn't manage to say goodbye etc as the last train was about to leave and ofc I didn't find my bag. I found it and had a couple of minutes to spare, she had moved over to the dancefloor somewhere. I didn't want to risk it and chose to run for the train instead. \n\nSince that night I hadn't seen her and didn't think much about it for quite a while. This week however we walked past eachother on our way to lunch, kind of looked at eachother like a \"hey I recognize you\" type of deal. \n\nStupid as I was I didn't make much of it and kept on walking, leaving me with this kind of excited feeling for some reason, lol. \n\nI am interested in making contact with this girl, though I do not quite know how to do it without feeling like a creep. I mean it has been quite some time since we last spoke, we study on different parts of campus, hence why we havn't really seen eachother. \n\nI do know her name however, could go through facebook, though I feel that is quite a lame way to go about it. With the risk of making myself look like a creep. \n\nAny tips on how I should make my approach? I mean we havn't really met since late August, don't know eachother very well..", "summary": "Met girl during first weeks of college, saw her again very briefly this week, want to make contact, not sure how to go about it. (Know her name & facebook)"}
{"id": "t3_2n3tqx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going to my college's dining hall while sick", "post": "So I wake up late today, and realize I feel like shit.  Nausea, dry heaves, the works.  No matter how much water I drink, it's still there.  So, I decide to go to the closest dining hall on campus, get some soup, tea, and something like ginger ale to try and ease it.\n\nThis particular dining hall does not have a bathroom, and has these tiny garbage cans.\n\nSo I'm getting my soup, when I start heaving again.  This time I puke in my mouth.  Trying to hold it in more, so I can find a garbage can, I clamp my mouth shut and cover it with my hand.  It didn't help.  A few seconds later and there's a large puddle of my vomit on the floor.  And on my hands.  And on my face.  And on my shoes.  And coming out my mouth and nose (remember how I clamped my mouth shut?).\n\nThen, before I can fully register what has just happened, I puke again, this time in the garbage can.  I *mostly* hit on target.  At that point someone from dining hall staff approaches me with a wet cloth, asking if I'm okay, and people are staring.  After trying to clean off the best I can, I hightail it out of there.", "summary": "I go to crowded college dining hall while sick, and end up puking A LOT all over the floor and myself"}
{"id": "t3_311870", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [F 18] found my boyfriend's [M 18] page on another website", "post": "I was on a new website which I don't really want to name, but I happened to look up my boyfriends common username and found him. \n\nI started to look through a couple things just to see what was going on a little and started noticing some weird stuff. He tends to flirt with a lot of girls and even had a post about him having this huge crush on a former teacher! He even denied having a girlfriend and was going about how he was single. I'm not sure what to do right now. \n\nI made a fake account and messaged him to see what he would say, but I knew he was already asleep so I'll have to see what goes down tomorrow. However, he's coming here in a few hours (it's 4:30 am) and I don't know whether to pretend everything's fine and play out the account to see where he goes, or to bring it up and potentially have a confrontation. \n\nI don't want to lose him, after all he's my first love and of course I understand it's hard to see the truth because of that, but I don't want to lose him. I need some advice on what to do at this point, should I wait or say something?", "summary": "boyfriend made an account and said weird stuff about his teacher and is flirting with other girls. Should I confront him, or should I play it out on an alternate account?"}
{"id": "t3_2t1dbv", "subreddit": "self", "title": "My parents will not let me work for the only place I can get a job offer.", "post": "I've applied to multiple jobs and pizza hut is the one that has offered me a job, twice. First time I turned it down because I got a job offer from amazon  (through staffing agency) the next day, but the day before orientation, they told me they had no assignments left. Great. Had to wait 1 month just to be told they had no job for me. 2 weeks later, I go to mcdonalds interview and didn't get it because it was an on-call job. Next up is kmart interview. I'm  guessing I didn't get it becuase I was quiet durimg the interview. Then I said fuck it, going to apply to pizza hut again. I get the call, go to the interview, and they tell me to go today at 11 a.m. I thought \"fuck yes, finally a job!.\" But that's not the case. My parents are telling me not to take it because it's a \"dangerous\" job. My dad and I basically got into an argument for the first time today becuase they didn't want me to get that job. He said if I don't take it, he'll give me $100 a month (yeah cause that's a lot for a 19 year old..) He says to not take get the job for my mom. My mom gets nervous easily and shes scared that I'll get in a crash or I'll get assaulted or something. It doesn't help that i got into a car crash on October or that my aunt and uncles baby died on sunday. I'm guessing the babies death got her scared of something happening to me. So now I'll be back to not having a job, while everyone I know has one. Going to try to make a small white lie that I will be working at the store as a pizza maker and only deliver pizza 5 times a day. Not sure about it though. Had to unwind all that on text.", "summary": "Have overprotective parents and a nervous of a wreck mom who wont let me get the only job offer that I can get."}
{"id": "t3_2n4kd1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] and my best friend [20M] since birth. We had sex and I need advice on how to talk to him about it", "post": "My best friend and I had sex. We talked about sleeping together a couple weeks ago and I told him I didn't think it was a good idea because I know he has been talking to girls and I didn't want to get emotionally attached. \n\nIt kind of just happened Thursday, then he spent the night. I said I didn't want it to be weird now and he agreed. I felt him being different (distant) that day, so I texted him that night telling him I didn't want it to be weird, that it was just something fun that happened and I expect nothing from him. He said there's no awkwardness but he was still being weird! We usually talk all day every day and I have heard nothing. \n\nHe has been weird since and it is making me feel animosity towards him. I am very close to his mom, so this is going to cause us to be around each other a lot. We saw a movie with his mom today and I felt myself not even wanting to look at him. I'm mad he is making it weird and I just want some advice about how to talk to him so it can either go back to normal or we can decide what to do next.", "summary": "best friend and I had sex. Now he's being weird and it's making me angry. Need advice on how to talk to him"}
{"id": "t3_3gnaw5", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Should I consolidate my debt?", "post": "I am 23 years old and I feel like I have a decent amount of debt that I was thinking I should perhaps consolidate? I just am not sure of the best route to take. All I know is the interest is killing me. I guess I should start off by telling you what my debt is -\n\nI have a credit card which is my main killer. I currently have around $3,500 on this card. The interest is at around 25%. Every month, while I make payments 0f $200\u2026 it charges me at least $60 for interest. \nI have a credit account with Ideal Image. There is only about $1,500 left on this and the interest is at around 26%, however because the amount is lower it charges me around $3 per month for interest.\nI have a car loan and to be honest I am not sure how much my interest rate is on that, however I know I have around $9,000 left on it to pay and I pay $293 a month.\n\nI feel like this is a lot of debt for someone who is 23. I am managing fine I guess, but the credit card specifically is just not going away.\nI should probably also mention that I have just started college again and I was granted a subsidized student loan for $3,500. I know I will have to take out another next year as well. I don't have to worry about paying this back until I graduate in a few years, but I would like to be able to pay it back easily in the future and not have it just piled on top of what I already have.\nI guess my main question is to ask if I should take out a small personal loan of some type, that has a lower interest rate and pay off my credit card and Ideal Image. \nI hope I provided enough information.\n\nAny recommendations? Thank you so much in advance!", "summary": "Have about 5K in credit card debt with very high interest and 9K car loan. How can I alleviate the situation?"}
{"id": "t3_46idbz", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Looking for a new job, need a bit of guidance.", "post": "Greetings people of r/jobs!\nI have been recently looking for a job that's a step up from what I do. It would take a while to explain exactly what I do, but here's the short version: I make microchips.\n\nI'm looking to relocate to Austin to help out a family member there and have seen a few positions that might fit me. But then there's the barrier of higher education. It kinda seems you need a four year degree and two associate degrees to become a waiter (exaggeration, but you get my point.).\n\nIn my current job, I learned how to operate machines I didn't even know existed prior to working there. I learned the ins and outs of how our product is made, all the steps and why. \n\nI even helped engineers modify one machine to fit our needs when previously it was collecting dust.\n\nAll this feels irrelevant because everyone says on their resume that they're a quick learner. In my case, it's not speculation. It's fact.\n\nI've got reference's in spades. Engineers, Technicians, Managers, even a guy who reports directly to our CEO.\n\nThat being said, I feel like I won't be noticed or quickly filtered out due to my lack of a degree. (Despite, in some cases, looking at job duties and knowing I could do said job standing on my head while juggling sparklers and chainsaws. Exaggeration again. I can't juggle.)\n\nAny advice beyond \"Get a degree\" would be helpful.\n\nRegards, Mad Fake Scientist.", "summary": "I've got skillz, they kinda pay some bills. Need to relocate to Austin, but living there is high costin'."}
{"id": "t3_17iy1j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [F25] being selfish for not wanting to leave my family to live near partner's [M26]?", "post": "I've been in a long distance relationship for the last 5 years. We live over 250 miles away from each other, and have done since the beginning, apart from a few years when I was at uni, I lived a lot closer to my SO.\n\nAfter uni I moved back to my home town, riddled with guilt that I barely saw my family in 3 years, because I spent almost every weekend at my partners (which I feel extremely guilty about). We have always been ok with the distance, there are obviously times when it's harder than others.\n\nWe're now seeing less and less of each other and I'm really starting to struggle, I'm lucky if I get a whole weekend with him every month. He works 6 days a week, so him staying with me is almost out of the question, and I can't afford any more than I already pay on travel.\n\nWe have discussed getting a place together, but the issue of where to live becomes an issue. I have looked at properties in his area, and for a start I wouldn't be able to afford rent, never mind the increased cost of living. \n\nI told him tonight that I don't think I could live far from my family. My parents are older than his, and I worry about them not having any family near them as they get older. He, on the other hand has an extremely large extended family, all of which live within a 5 mile radius.\n\nAm I being selfish for now wanting to move near them? When I told my SO how I felt, his response was \"well, we have a problem\". He did however say that he would move up to me, but he still has courses he needs to complete with work.\n\nHe told me that I'm acting like a child and didn't understand the issue of me moving away because I would still see my parents every fortnight. Surely if travelling weren't an issue I would see my SO more often than that?!\n\nI'm feeling so conflicted, and feel selfish for not wanting to leave my parents. I love my SO, and I want to be with him, but we have hit this major fork in the road and I don't know what to do.", "summary": "Relationship of 5 years. I'm conflicted as to whether I should abandon my family again to live 250 miles away with my SO, and near his family."}
{"id": "t3_163q7i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15 M] and GF [17 F] haven't kissed after two months, need advice.", "post": "Okay I realize that I'm 15, and I'm just a kid and all that shit and this will probably get downvoted, but I need some help. \n\nSo me and my GF have been dating since the beginning of November and it has been great emotionally. We have both liked each other for a couple years before this, and it has been pretty good.\n\nI have had two GFs in the past that I have had physical and emotional relationships with.\nShe has not had a boyfriend before me and had not had her first kiss yet.\nI want her first kiss to be amazing\n\nI want to kiss her so badly, but I feel like even though we have talked about it and she wants too, It will somehow end up with her hating me. I know this is crazy and not going to happen. I think I have self confidence issues and have been through things like this in other situations. I realize this is most likely hormones and all that  other puberty shit. \n\nMy question: How do I go about kissing her and making it amazing?\n\nThanks in advance for any replies I get (if I get any)", "summary": "i want to kiss GF, but think she will hate me. I realize this is irrational. Her first kiss. How do I go about dealing with this?"}
{"id": "t3_1irc5c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Sales associates/stylists, how do you go about getting clients/ referrals?", "post": "My girlfriend (24f) is a stylist/sales associate at Hugo boss. She has good style and I always get complimented by the outfits she puts together. She has been at Hugo boss a little under a year now and is having trouble with consistent sales, clientelling, and referrals. She is off to a good start but is looking for ways to expand her clients and referrals faster.\n\nI am in finance and tried showing her some things I do to get clients but the transition to fashion is a bit different and doesn't seem to work.\n\nSo, reddit, what are some ways you go about building your book of business in particular in the fashion world as a stylist/sales associate.", "summary": "gf is a stylist/sales associate at Hugo boss in a high end mall and is looking to grow her clients/referrals faster to give her consistent sales. Any and all ideas welcomed."}
{"id": "t3_3vv56b", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Cat won't stop chewing on her tail! HELP!!", "post": "My sweet sweet 1 year old Female Orange Tabby has developed this unfortunate habit of chasing her tail and chewing it up. And there is blood EVERYWHERE. We took her to the vet, they gave her antibiotics, put on an e-collar, gave us Composure chews and sent us our way after a $300 bill for the check up, an x-ray (to check if her tail is broken - it wasn't), and all the medication and treats. \n\nBut that was a month ago. Now my baby has an e-collar on day in and day out. I try to take it off when I'm home and supervising but it's still on for the majority of the time. I've tried 'weaning' her off the collar but anytime I've left her unsupervised without the collar I come back to the same scene of blood everywhere. To add to this, the e-collar has given her a nasty case of blackheads under her chin. \n\nI don't know what to do! I can't afford to keep going to the vet for expensive tests and they don't seem to be taking the bull by the horns either. The mentioned starting her on anti-anxiety medication or something for OCD. Is this my only option at this point? \n\nHas anyone else had a similar experience? What did you do?\nAlso, what do I do about the acne?\n\nPlease help, I can't keep watching my sweet girl suffer through all these health issues, it's absolutely breaking my heart because she is truly special and wonderful and I love her.", "summary": "My cat won't stop biting her tail into a bloody mess, and the e-collar we've had to put on her for the last month is giving her acne and is not a long term solution. Please advise."}
{"id": "t3_4m9dqw", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Credit Card Rewards Question", "post": "Okie doke, so I'm 21 and just getting into this whole \"adult\" gig and I have been looking at various credit card options for their rewards programs. I really want the TD Bank cc, but being a whippersnapper they won't quite approve me (great credit, the only real knock on it is that I don't have enough lines of credit). Anyway, so I got another CC that had preapproved me and will be receiving it shortly. Is there any reason not to use it for literally every purchase I would normally use my debit for and pay it off every month? I know the point is they make money when you don't and when you overspend, but I'm super tight with my money, have a few grand saved and a job lined up and literally no expenses that my current graduate assistantship doesn't pay for (with about $400 left over each month). My main point is, am I missing some sort of caveat to credit card usage that would discourage this? My line of credit is up to like $3000 or so and I can't even fathom hitting that, but could cover it easily if I did.", "summary": "Should I use my credit card for all expenses to build credit and earn pretty decent rewards since I can and will repay them every month before any interest hits?"}
{"id": "t3_wftym", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I got in a car accident and I have some questions", "post": "I'm 17. I was driving my dad's '06 Audi A3 on a gravel road last night around midnight at about 5km/h over the posted speed limit. As I rounded a corner, there was something running across the road. I swerved to avoid it, over corrected my slide, and wound up flying off the side of the road into the forest. If it's not totalled, it's got at least $10,000 worth of damage. Thankfully nobody was hurt. The police officer was really nice and waived the careless driving ticket, and the tow truck driver was really good. My dad is absolutely furious (understandably). This all happened 9 hours ago and I'm still shaking. I can't get the accident to stop replaying in my head and I can't stop analysing it and telling myself what I should have done differently. Is there an easy way to make myself stop thinking of these things?", "summary": "Crashed my dad's Audi, nobody hurt. Accident is replaying in my head and it's getting to me. How can I make it stop replaying in my head?"}
{"id": "t3_26qhti", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] got dumped by my [19 F] after 1 year and I'm a fool who doesn't know what to do!", "post": "When we got together nothing split us up, we aere happy as all young people are, into the relationship i started taking seing her for granted.\nShe felt so shit if i would ever cancel with her. But alas i was not told, as most females do not say what is up.\n\nSo a guy comes onto the scene and shows her all the attention she so requires and the attention i should have shown her, but as i said, i saw seeing her for granted. Thing is, i dont have many people in my life, and she is such a huge part of me, i was literally a fool to not show it.\n\nWhen we are together things are right, we can sense it, but when apart she denies it all and its breaking my heart.\nWe had a year of love where i did not show her the attention she deserved, she is perfect to me, and every morning i wake up hating myself more for what i have done.\n\nI do not know if i can win back another chance, or if it is too late, but thinking of her or seeing her is soo painful. She stills means the world to me, I wish i wanted a fool.", "summary": "I disregarded my gf so many times she doesnt know how i really feel about her, scared its too late to win her back, yet i still love her so much. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_2m6xw7", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Should I report some guys in my class for cheating?", "post": "So, In my geography class we have just completed a large piece of coursework that goes towards our final grade. And my teacher, quite stupidly, left them out on his desk at lunch. A few guys went up there took pictures of a pages of someone else's in our class. Also the guys that have took the pictures aren't the brightest and, from what I have seen of there work, are going to fail. Bear in mind these people are likely to fail most of there subjects anyway. This person was one of the top people in our geography class and everyone tries to copy from him. If anything I feel sorry for him.\nAnyway, I am no longer friends with the person that did it. But when I was friends with him I had access to his facebook account and I still do now. For some reason I was on his account and I saw that he got a message from one of his friends saying thanks for the pictures. I was intrigued so I looked, although I shouldn't of, and it was pictures of that piece of coursework. \nNow I'm caught in a bit of a dilemma. I'm not sure whether to report them to the teacher for copying and risk getting told off for being on someone else's facebook account. Or just let them get away with cheating.\n\nI just cannot make up my mind on whether to report them or not. Any advice on this matter would be a huge help!", "summary": "Some guys in my class have taken pictures of someone else's coursework and are using them to cheat and get better grade and I don't know if to report them."}
{"id": "t3_2rqeda", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(24/F) Looking to buy my first home with partner (29/M) but feel reservations as i work only part time and he works full time.", "post": "This is my first post so I apologize for any reddit errors i may make.\n\nMy partner (29/M) and I (24/F) have been together for nearly two years and are planning on purchasing a home together. Very exciting and empowering road for both of us and we have received  much praise from our families on our decision. My partners family has also offered to give us a substantial amount to help kick off our deposit (along with what we have already saved). Although this is something i very much want i am beginning to have some reservations, mostly because i feel guilt on the part that over that last few months i have been unsuccessfully trying find a full-time job. I feel like it is wrong to put my partner in a position where  he will be putting in more money then me and possibly paying more for some time. I also feel guilty to be taking money from his family when im only working part time and contributing considerably less. My parents are divorced  and i have had to hear my father bicker about how he worked for everything and my mother took it all. This makes me feel i have to be an exact  even with my partner financially.\n\nPlease give me some advice fellow redditors?!!", "summary": "(24/f) Guilt of buying first home with Bf (29/M) when i am not as financially stable as him.?!"}
{"id": "t3_22a3w2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] wants to date her [18 F], interpreting what she messaged me", "post": "Hello /r/relationships,\n\nLike the title says, I'm 18 and I met a girl over the internet that I really started liking the first day already although she did not have a real picture of her face uploaded. She was afraid of showing her face to everyone on that app and she also didn't want to send me a picture in the private chat at first. After I changed my picture, she messaged me about it and I then said that I really want to see her face. She delivered and sent me a picture which made me very happy. Anyway, we were chatting throughout the last weeks and got along very well.\n\nYesterday she asked me why I did download the app where people can 'meet' each other. I told her because of the reason she also mentioned on her profile and that's kind of something like 'Whatever happens'. She then sent me a smiley and said she was going to sleep. I responded with 'Yeah, good night and sleep well, Beauty'. She did read that message but didn't respond.\n\nIn the next morning, I asked her if she slept well and how she feels like. She said that she didn't sleep too well. I asked her why that was and she mentioned that she doesn't really know and she might've thought too much about something. I said that I'm always there to listen to her and she said 'Maybe later :)'.\n\nShe asked me if I'm always that nice and friendly and I said that it depends on who I am talking to. I also mentioned that she's the only girl I'm messaging (which really is true) and that she's beeing very sympathic. She told me the same about me beeing sympathic and I just felt very happy.\n\nNow I just wonder if these are good signs. I was considering to ask her for a date in like a month or so. I know that might be such a long time but I've always been like this. I like learning more about people first and then ask them to go out with me.\n\nBut anyway, thanks for reading. :)", "summary": "Met a girl over the internet. She seems to like me but in what way? And is what she messages me a good sign for a date and maybe more or not?"}
{"id": "t3_qo17d", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Having trouble uploading funny clips to youtube", "post": "Hi,\n\nAs a person who's wasted so much time watching funny clips from youtube, I've decided to contribute to the problem by uploading funny clips from my favorite movies (Team America, Dumb and Dumber, Friday, Talledega Nights, etc.) to youtube, but I am currently having trouble accessing the videos from the DVD's I've bought to youtube.\n\nI'm currently using DVD Decrypter v. 3.5.4.0 and usually it breaks down the movie down into four videos or more of 15 minutes a piece. But most of the time DVD Decrypter either gives me unusable video clips (of one second duration or something) or automatically puts the video in French for some reason. So I can only really use a quarter of the movie that isn't missing or in French. I find older DVD's more likely to give me unusable video.\n\nAgain I'm not trying to upload entire movies to youtube, just their best bits like the robbery scene from Heat or any drill instructor scene from Full Metal Jacket. **Unless this is totally illegal, then what I said previously was just a hypothetical situation and should be disregarded immediately.** /jedi mind trick", "summary": "Is there any reliable (and more importantly free) way for me to take clips from DVD's I've bought and put them on youtube?"}
{"id": "t3_r3kk9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Has anyone fooled a huge group of people with a dumb fact?", "post": "My experience was back in high school during the week that stride gum came out. I figured that since it was something new and different it would be easy to fool people into thinking something ridiculous about it. \n\nOne day i am sitting in the cafeteria with a pack of stride gum and I think up the perfect story. I turn to my friends and say \"Did you guys know that Stride gum wrappers are edible?\" and of course they laugh and call bullshit, but i do not back down so easily. \"Watch!\" i say as i stick a peppermint stride, wrapper and all, into my mouth and begin to chew. After about 30 seconds, i take the gum out, and to my amusement, the wrapper disappeared! the look of amazement on their faces made me feel like my mission was accomplished. \n\nWeeks pass by and i had almost forgotten about my prank when i take out a pack of stride gum in class and the girl next to me says, \"Did you know you could eat the wrapper on those things?\" i thought she had heard about my prank so i chuckled and asked her to show me. so she took some gum and chewed it took out the gum and showed the missing wrapper. I asked her how she knew this, and she told me a name i hadn't heard before. It made me wonder how far this thing went, so i started seeing how far this prank went. I asked around if people knew that stride gum wrappers were edible and to my surprise, the whole school knew, and most of them believed it! to this day i keep finding the news spreading. From different cities and states people will still tell me that they have heard about the edible wrappers!", "summary": "i convinced a few friends that stride gum wrappers were edible, and found out later that my prank had spread to different states"}
{"id": "t3_vrmz6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Mind racing 1000miles per minute", "post": "First lets get the basics out of the way. \nMe f/20 the boyfriend is m/27 Relationship is 6months long and we have lived together for the past 4months.\nMy boyfriend left his phone home today while he's at work. I usually use his phone anyways but i did something so horrible. I went through his e-mails and in the beginning of February we broke up for two weeks and he slept with another girl. Well we got back together and the e-mail i read was in the end of February from that girl saying she was pregnant. I'm at a loss for words. Granted he's never heard from her since February and she has his cell number, e-mail accounts, and she knows where we live and there's been no other mention of this \"baby\" once he called her out on it but isn't this something he should have mentioned to me? \nI don't believe her anyways she just really wanted her belongings from his house.\n\nThen there's the responses he sent to females on craiglist (before we even met). I don't hold any of this against him but he responded to transexuals as well as gay men looking for \"Tops\". From reading the e-mails it doesn't sound like he's ever gone through with any of the meet ups but it makes me uncomfortable.\n\nI feel awful that i invaded his privacy but now i feel more awkward about what I've read. So what should I do if anything at all?! I'm really stuck here and feel like i have no one to talk to that could understand.", "summary": "Snooped through boyfriend's phone found old alarming e-mails and don't know how to react if at all. Advice please?"}
{"id": "t3_25cwbw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] and my bf [25 M], are planning on stay in his parents house to save for a house; can I and how can I establish boundaries with them?", "post": "So here's the details; my boyfriend and I want to buy a house within the next year or so - but we know that if we were to go out and rent it would be much harder to save for a down-payment.  \n\nHis parents approached us with the idea that we could live in their basement (where my SO currently stays), renovate it to make it more like a basement apartment and pay rent at a much less price than we would if we actually went out and rented. (somewhere around $300-$500/mnth) \n\nThat being said, even though this is a great offer I do have my hesitations. My biggest is boundaries; both his parents are retired and are home quite often. They'll often come into his room when we're together, many times without knocking and stay around for a while.\n\nThough I don't *always* have a problem with it, it does bug me a little. So I'm worried that when I move in that they'll be hanging around more often.\n\nI understand, its their house and they can do what they want - though my bf says if we're paying rent they can't just come down here (ya right!). \n\nSo my question is, is it possible to establish boundaries with your in-laws when you live with them? and if so, how?", "summary": "Planning on living with bf's parents basement, paying a low rent price. Is it possible to establish boundaries with them? And if so, how?"}
{"id": "t3_343rgq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26/F] with my boyfriend [30/M] of three years. Clinging onto a toxic(?) relationship and needing help to let go.", "post": "First off, this guy is my best friend. I love him, but we've always fought. Sometimes as little as once in a few months, sometimes as often as four or five times in a week. Regardless, fights have been a regular thing. They usually revolve around disparity in social needs (I want more time together; he wants more time alone) and exes (that one has been solved for the most part). \n\nLately, our fights have been full of blame/accusations, grudges, and personal attacks. It's resulted in us living separately after two years of living together and him cutting off lines of communication. \n\nBut even though we've got all this bitterness, I can't seem to end things. Everytime I think of ending this relationship, I think of the way he kisses me, the pet names, etc. and then I wimp out. I've lived in this state for four years, and I've been with him for three of them. I associate the whole metropolitan city with him. \n\nI keep thinking things will get better. And they do, for awhile. They're great. But, in between, I have to withstand the fights full of verbal abuse, accusations, blame. It gets really hurtful and really personal. \n\nPeople who have been in this type of relationship and also were very attached to that partner, how did you end up leaving? What helped you do it? How did you cope?", "summary": "Very attached to verbally abusive partner. People who have been in similar situations, how did you convince yourself to end thigns and how did you cope afterwards?"}
{"id": "t3_4vv247", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "I [24M] am pretty lost/confused on what to do with girl [22F] who I am sure likes me, but also has a boyfriend", "post": "Okay. I met this girl maybe about 3 months ago, and I kind of suspected her of liking me since before we actually formally met each other, as she was always that one girl at every house show I'd go to that would be staring at me from across the room. \n\nFast-forward a little bit to her birthday party that was 2 weeks ago:\nShe had interactions with me that made me pretty much 100% that she does like me, and to add to my own sureness, several of our friends came up to me and said something along the lines of, \"hey, she obviously really likes you.\" \n\nLater that night, we're all still hanging out, and we're talking about a camping trip that this girl is about to go on.\nWhen I asked whom she is going camping with, her response was, \"My... boyfriend.\"\nShe didn't seem too thrilled to mention him.\n\nOf course, learning that she has a boyfriend was surprising to me myself, but a peculiar thing is that her roommates/best friends for the past few years also had reactions along the lines of, \"what boyfriend? Since when do you have a boyfriend?\"\n\nSo yeah, for some reason she has a boyfriend that no one knows exists except for her.\n\nFast-forward to 2 nights ago, when I run into her at our mutual friend's show. We had some great conversation, and the night ended with me walking her to her car, and we exchanged phone numbers.", "summary": "Like this girl, entirely sure that she likes me back, but she has a secret boyfriend and I'm just freaking out about the whole thing"}
{"id": "t3_3qaei3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] with my boyfriend [28 M] of 2 years doesn't think he can be \"in love\"", "post": "I (28 F) have been with my boyfriend (28 M) for 2 years. He's my best friend and we get along really well. He's a good boyfriend to me and we have a lot of fun together. He gets along great with my friends and family. However, lately the relationship feels stagnant and it seems like there is no future. I think the reason I feel this way is he has never communicated his feelings towards me and I am starting to develop stronger feelings towards him. We haven't said I love you, even though I do feel that way about him and have said it to him. I believe that saying those words shouldn't be rushed but he told me he doesn't know if he can be in love...ever. He doesn't know if he loves his family and he often feels \"nothing\" towards people.  I think he might be suffering from some form of depression. If I try to talk about our relationship it usually turns into a fight where he totally shuts down. I've asked him several times if he wants to be together and that if he wants out we can still be friends. He always says he wants to be together when I give him this option. \n\nWe talked this weekend about it and he admitted he thinks he might have depression because he feels very up and down all the time and often feels \"nothing\" and wants to \"disappear.\" He said he doesn't know if he'll ever have strong enough feelings to be in love and that he's had this same problem in his last relationship.\n\nPart of me thinks he is suffering from depression and that things could change and that I should be there for him but part of me thinks it's stupid for me to hold out for someone who may never feel strongly enough about me in the way I need. I would like to stress that otherwise things are really great between us, we have the same interests, the same sense of humor, and he is truly my best friend.", "summary": "My boyfriend doesn't think he can be in love. He might be depressed. Might just not feeling strongly enough about me."}
{"id": "t3_1738zs", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "He (31/m) is an amazing guy, but I (29/m) just am not feeling it... romantic getaway scheduled for this weekend, WTF do I do?", "post": "I've been in a long distance relationship with this guy since October of last year. He lives 6 hours away and we've visited each other only three times, but we communicate frequently via text, phone, email, and (occasionally) written letters. When we first met I fell SO HARD for him. He was a 99% match on OKcupid and on paper he seemed like a perfect mate for me, so even though I had thought I was forever done with LDRs I figured I would give it a try. He has been nothing short of super sweet and patient with me always, which I have never experienced before, and he has surprised me numerous times with some truly beautiful and touching hand-made gifts.\n\nHowever, since our last visit I've had this feeling that we're just not right for each other in the long run. We have differing opinions about how quickly we want to move forward and whether or not to someday have kids, and there is a palpable lack of chemistry; dates with him involve SO. MUCH. AWKWARD. SILENCE. It is killing me that this wonderful guy just isn't right for me. I wish I could be as giving and loving to him as he has been to me, but it just feels weird and I know I have to break it off.\n\nThe problem is, we are supposed to go away for what was going to be a \"romantic weekend\"... I recently told him that I was having uncertainties about the relationship and that I wanted to talk to him about it in person. He said sure, good idea. So, it's really going to be a \"we need to talk\" weekend :-/  \n\nI guess this is the kind of thing I have to play by ear, but I would love some guidance re: how to approach this situation. I hate the thought of him driving 3 hours to meet me at a hotel, only for me to say that maybe we shouldn't stay together, but I would feel worse saying it over the phone or through some other means of communication. I guess my real question is, how can I make this break-up as non-shitty for him as possible?", "summary": "Supposed to have a weekend away with my super-nice but incompatible long-distance boyfriend; I'm pretty sure I need to break things off and don't want to be a dick about it. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2p6bmu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 M] am stuck between two men [22 M] and [23M]. Former dumped me in Sept, the latter entered a FWB relationship, and the former wants back in.", "post": "In September my boyfriend of 10 months (Bart) broke up with me. We had been fighting almost all summer and it was a long, heartbreaking process. For the last month he insisted he didn't need to say \"I love you\" and we almost never had sex. Awful. \n\nAbout a month later my ex (Steve) from less than an hour away just dumped his ex and we entered a sort of FWB situation. We had been there before because we have excellent sexual chemistry, but the romance wasn't there for YEARS. Now, after a month, the first ex (Bart) and I exchanged letters and we agreed to a friendship, he started going to the gym with me and it was a really good. We both achieved long-sought goals of physical fitness and he was a good motivator. The past two weeks he's been getting cozier. Four days ago he came over and we finally kissed again and we had a loooong talk. I explained that telling somebody you don't love them, and wont have sex with them, isn't a real relationship. He had many many emotional outbursts in the past, which I explained were totally unacceptable. \n\nThen he pulled what feels like a high school girl move and opened up about a dark secret (long story is he was taken advantage of by a Sugar Daddy who helped pay for college expenses and it had repercussions that manifested as intimacy issues). I told him I didn't really give a shit about it. I also told him that I'd be open to another attempt at a relationship but I wont call him my boyfriend or partner until \"It damn well feels like it\". Maybe that wasn't fair of me. \n\nSo here I am, between two boys. The FWB (Steve) needs to be made aware because we established an exclusive sexual relationship for health reasons. I dunno if I want to go back to an emotionally immature, possibly sexless relationship. Oh and all three of us aren't financially independent because student loans lol", "summary": "I don't know whether to take back the crazy, or stick with the dick I've known for years. Both satisfy separate needs. Halp?"}
{"id": "t3_u90m2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Lies on the internet about my father, Lost his job and cant get a new one because of what this guy is saying.", "post": "its a fairly long story so i will do my best to make it to the point. My dad  was dealing with this guy over seas about a tile business they were working on together. One thing led to another and the guy turned sour with him and started accusing my father of owing him all this money. I talked to my dad about it and he explained the whole thing out to me and what basically happened is the guy decided to charge him for a bunch of free samples he gave to my dad.\n\nMy dad obviously refuses to pay it and as a result the guy becomes furious and rights a blog and several reviews for his name pretty much trashing him. Now whenever my dad is looking for a job or someone to work with to get some money just for us to get by, he gets shut down. People will just google his name and believe what they see right away.\n\nNow im turning to the people of reddit. I could really use some help. I need somebody to help me get these things off google or at least make them less visible. If anyone has any advice for me please dont hesitate to share :). Also if you want his name to look up the stuff that is being said message me and i can send it to you.", "summary": "There is this guy writing lies about my dad trashing his name and it makes it impossible for my dad to find work. If anyone could help it would be greatly appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_34pu3a", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My GF [F/18] says she got kissed by another guy. What do I do?", "post": "So my girlfriend got kissed by this guy at a party \"out of the blue\". She says that she pushed him away instantly and gathered her girlfriends in a room crying for advice on what to do now. She didn`t tell me until she came back to her place. (I was waiting for her)\n\nWhen she told me I didn`t really believe her, and frankly it didnt hurt me at first. We went to bed and she started crying over how much it wasn`t her fault and that the kid had been kissing alot of other girls that night. She begged me not to break up with her, and I forgave her after listening to her (but not fully believing her unlikely story).\n\nWhat should I do now? This is the second time in our 5 month long relationship she`s kissed a guy. The other time (in the start of our relationship) she made out with another guy and cried to me etc.", "summary": "My GF says she got kissed by another guy out of the blue, I forgave her after listening to her but now I`m clueless what to do and how to trust her again when shes drinking."}
{"id": "t3_4juyep", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my boyfriend [22 M] one year, finding LDR hard and wanting some advice", "post": "So I've been exclusive with my boyfriend for nearly a year now, long distance for a few months. Our relationship wasn't always long distance, we used to live in the same city but I got accepted into medical school and had to move. He works in research and is applying for jobs in my city so that we can be together again in the future.\n\nI guess I'm just finding it hard to feel loved and desired with all this physical distance between us and I was hoping to get some advice or encouragement from fellow redditors on things we can do to close the (figurative) distance and perhaps some words of encouragement. Stories on how you did it or how friends have made a LDR work for them would also be much appreciated as one tends to not hear about when things work our so much. \n\nI have no desire to end the relationship and I love him very much.", "summary": "22F and 24M, 1 yr, now in LDR: seeking advice and encouragement on how to handle the distance."}
{"id": "t3_2rojrk", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "My employer processed my time-sheets late because of their Christmas break. Now I'm not getting payed for the hours that I worked for another two weeks. (Nebraska)", "post": "Hello all, thanks in advance for any advice you may have.\n\nLet me preface this by letting you know that I am currently working an hourly security position for a state College in Nebraska. We are part time (30hrs/week), hand in our timestamps every Monday and are paid bi-weekly.\n\nChristmas break for employees at the college I work for was from 12-23-2014 to 1-5-2015. However, the Department I work in (Security) does not get any of this time off and I ended up working my regular hours and I filled out my time-stamp and turned it in on time. On Monday the 5th of January 2015 (when college employees returned), my manager turned in all of the timestamps from our department, and found out that the people in charge of payroll decided that they didn't have time to process all 6 of them and told us that we would have to wait until the 22nd of January to get paid. \n\nWhat exacerbates this is that before break my manager was informed that if all time-sheets were turned in on the first day back from break, that they would be processed and put on the payday for the 8th of January. \n\nSo, as a student already struggling to make ends meet and bills to pay, I'm sitting here getting half of what I should be getting payed on the 8th of January.\n\nI had a meeting with the lady who is charge of payroll, and over the course of the better part of an hour, all that I got from her was a \"Well, you guys are just going to have to wait until the 22nd, there's nothing I can do.\" \n\nWhat steps, if any, can I take here? I did everything right on my end, so I feel like there should be something that I can do. Thanks a ton!", "summary": "HR messed up and didn't process my time-stamp on time and now I have to wait another two weeks to get paid."}
{"id": "t3_4mxquy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my two [30ish F] friends. Unsure how to feel after incident", "post": "Just wanted to know if what I'm feeling is right. Basically there are two women I'll call one Cara and the other Steph. I arranged to have a dinner with Steph (she is an awesome cook), Cara was the driving force since they haven't seen each other in a while. This was 2 weeks ago. A few other people were invited, Cara asked Steph to make her favorite dish.\n\nDay of the dinner, Cara doesn't show. We were hanging out earlier but needed to do other things so we went our separate ways (3 hrs before the dinner). She didn't answer any calls or texts. Steph was upset but she said it was fine (probably isn't but I'm talking her through it).\n\nI was worried and called and next day (it was close to 24hrs since I last heard from her) and her friend picked up saying they're out bike riding. He puts Cara on the phone and she said she was sick and she currently doesn't have her phone on her. \n\nI've talked with Steph and Cara hasn't called or texted, nothing. I'm a bit upset. I honestly didn't think Cara would act this way, and frankly I'm disappointed. We hang out more often than Steph due to distance, but now I feel like she is just being rude. Cara is feeling a bit of tension from me since I've barely responded to her or talked to her (I help her with business for free when I have free time).\n\nShould I tell Cara my opinions? \n- That I think it was quite rude to stand people up \n- Not contact anyone involved at the dinner for over 22hrs (only being reached by someone contacting her) causing us to worry\n- Being \"sick\" with no phone but still well enough to go out? (I call bull but purely speculation)\n- And finally not even contacting Steph after missing a dinner planned for her\n\nOr am I wrong since it's her life (she and her friend sounded annoyed/tense? when I called)", "summary": "One friend doesn't show to a dinner after she was the one suggesting it, sketchy reason given after no one hears from her for 20+ hrs, and no apology to the friend/cook who was asked to host"}
{"id": "t3_44iuz8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Did I [25F] mess up by breaking up with my [26M] boyfriend of 6 months? Or did I dodge a bullet?", "post": "I moved to a nearby town to start undergrad a year ago. I met a guy, John, through mutual friends and we clicked instantly. After a few months, we started dating.\n\nHe's a really wonderful person. Incredibly thoughtful, sweet, and supportive. My job and school keep me busy, but we found time to hang together when we could and it was always the highlight of my week. It's the first relationship for both of us, and we were very happy together. Lots of shared hobbies and interests. We even had a great match on our obscure music tastes!\n\nAlthough John is a fantastic person, he lacks motivation. He has been living on savings for the whole time I've known him and is not pursuing employment currently (despite my encouragement).\n\nI broke up with him a couple months ago, believing that I could not change his lack of motivation and I should respect myself enough to at least date someone who has a job. Also, I am not sure how I feel about intimacy. Although we hadn't had any sort of sex yet, I felt that was probably coming soon. I can't decide if it is weird for me at 25 to be nervous or if I'm just a late bloomer and I should get my experience when I can.\n\nBy chance, we ran into each other today while shopping and we had a coffee. I realized how deeply I missed him. He misses me too and wants to get back together.\n\nShould we get back together? Is it stupid of me to \"throw away\" my best friend because I am hung up on an unemployment issue? Or did I dodge a bullet and should I try to let time heal my aching heart?", "summary": "Is breaking up with someone because they're unmotivated and I'm nervous about intimacy a stupid choice when you click with them on every other issue? Should we get back together?"}
{"id": "t3_2l4vg4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How Do I [18M] Go About Meeting New People?", "post": "Hello, Reddit. This is something I've been wondering for a while now. See, my last girlfriend was a coworker so I had no problem with meeting someone new and asked them out. She was my first girlfriend. (she broke up with me and ignores me now and pretends like she never was friends with me). She was only with me for a month before deciding she wasn't ready. After going back through everything she said, it hurt me a lot considering she was talking a lot about our future.\n\nI'm not gonna lie, I'm afraid of meeting new people and trying to get into the dating scene again that I'm willing to overcome this fear. (I have some mental health problems so they don't help) I'm a college student at a community college. The city I live in is pretty small, but a decent size for the part of my state that I live in. Other than school I can't think of anywhere else to safely meet new people. I haven't had much luck on R4R or other online ways.\n\n Also, how do I just approach them and ask them out? Should I try to befriend them first or go into it? I'm still new to the whole dating thing.", "summary": "Shitty first time dating experience. Want to meet new people and try to date comfortably but don't know how to."}
{"id": "t3_2v54pk", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by burning myself then spraying myself in the face with pus.", "post": "Not really that bad but eh. So today I made the mistake of putting too much juice in my Doge RDA, and some of it spilled out of the airflow vent on to my finger and burned me. But that's not quite the end of the story. Fast forward an hour or so and I'm pressing on the blister to release the pus every 5 - 10 minutes. No big deal, except the time I did it before writing this post it squirted right up into my face. If I hadn't been wearing glasses it would've went right in my eye.", "summary": "Burnt myself and sprayed pus on my face. Also, wear safety goggles or glasses when working with fluids you don't want in your eye."}
{"id": "t3_3vspq1", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[CA] Can my school force me to do volunteer work for the Salvation Army?", "post": "Not sure if this goes here but I don't know where else to ask.\n\nMy public high school has an event called \"project day\" every 6 weeks. It's a pass or fail grade, and it does count for a credit. I'm a senior, and this Friday we have to either volunteer for a retirement home, or volunteer for the Salvation Army.\n\nStudents had an option for which organisation to assist with. However, this information was distributed via English classes, which I'm not a part of. Instead, I received a letter saying I'm signed up to volunteer for the Salvation Army by default as the retirement home had enough volunteers.\n\nI don't support the Salvation Army at all. They're one of the worst organisations out there in my opinion. I emailed my teacher asking to switch me for this exact reason, but she never responded.\n\nCan my school force me to volunteer or else they'll give me a failing grade? Who do I talk to so I don't have to volunteer for the Salvation Army?", "summary": "My high school is forcing me to volunteer for the Salvation Army, an organisation I do not want to help. Can they do this? How do I avoid this?"}
{"id": "t3_1occls", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] with my new SO [26 F] problem with sexual arousal.", "post": "So to not beat around the bush basically looking for help/advice in how to best handle the problem.\n\nI had trouble maintaining an erection while first being with her. For some reason condoms have always made me feel like I lose 80% of sensation which is a big buzz kill but the only protection we have atm. She's also a larger girl which makes positioning difficult. \n\nThis is what scares me the most. I've only been with a handful of women and the only time I've ever had performance problems was with one other larger woman. I attributed that first time to being on a rebound from my shambles of a marriage not to mention she really wasn't that good of a person.\n\nBut now I'm with a larger girl and having the same problem... this frightens the hell out of me because she's an amazing person. I am truly attracted to her but when the condom became an issue I took it off and it was great, stayed hard, made her orgasm. But stopped because it made her too nervous.\n\nI don't want to scare her off because of the issue. Her weight really doesn't factor into who I want to be with but if I can't perform I know she's going to think that's why.\n\nI guess im just mostly conflicted about my feelings because with that first larger woman I couldn't...just couldn't have sex. But now I did with this woman that I really care for but not without complications... any objective thoughts?", "summary": "Trouble staying hard with a condom, afraid because of a past relationship that had a similar problem which at the time I attributed to lack of sexual interest."}
{"id": "t3_36j1f1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU-By browsing reddit at work and not being familiar with /r/creepy", "post": "So this actually just happened...I'm at work, obviously not being productive and browsing through reddit. I click a link that takes me to /r/creepy, a sub I haven't really looked at much. Apparently there's a small smudge on the screen when you browse that sub. I was not aware of this.\nFuck up, initiated...I spend 5 minutes first using the old spit and fingerwipe, then full blown windex and towel to try and clean it. I figured since it wasn't dirty, the screen must be about to go out. Since this clearly was not my fault, I called my boss and texted her a picture of said smudge. They've already ordered a new computer, she's going to call her techie daughter to try and \"fix\" it. I shut down the computer and put it in her office, and just grabbed her laptop that she keeps in there to continue my browsing.\nWhich leads me to go back to said page and see the smudge again. I've just realized I just got trolled by /r/creepy. I'm just really hoping her daughter doesn't use reddit very much :)", "summary": "got trolled by the smudge on /r/creepy, now my boss may realize how useful I really am."}
{"id": "t3_1jn9yz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/M] need advice about a girl I've liked (17/F)", "post": "I've known this girl for a about a year now and when I met her she was depressed, we started to text all the time and seemed to really get along so i asked her for a relationship but she said she wasn't looking for a relationship (doesn't like commitment). Two months later she starts dating this guy but from what she's told me shes not taking the relationship seriously and that it probably wont last much longer. she says she likes talking to me every day and that i'm \"very important\" to her she even gets sad sometimes if I don't text her but she has gotten through the depression now. My feelings for her have not changed. so am I just super far into the friend zone?", "summary": "Girl means a lot to me and talks to me all the time but has a boyfriend yet still seems attached to me, what should i do?"}
{"id": "t3_4njodr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] and my new housemate [19 M] advice on confronting him about sounds from video games?", "post": "So I just moved to sunny San Francisco after a long house searching period, and I think I'm already having troubles with my new housemate, who's been living here for a while. He's a HUGE fan of shooting games, especially war simulators like Call Of Duty, and plays them literally all day long, as he currently doesn't have school or a job. I'm generally pretty okay with not minding what my housemates do, but when you come home/ stay in a house filled with the sound of bloody murder and gunshots, it gets a bit tiring after a while. I've tried to stay out of the house as much as possible (San Fran has been great at helping with that), but I always have to come home in the end. \n\nDespite what I've described, he's a really good kid. Very clean, respectful of my privacy/interests, and overall pretty good natured. With that, I know that he'd listen if I brought up the topic with him, but I'm not sure how to reach a friendly compromise.Turning the volume down wouldnt help very much because our residence is incredibly small, and the gaming station is right next to my room. Any advice or ideas would be sincerely appreciated.", "summary": "New housemate plays a lot of shooters and the noise is slowly getting to me. Need help on coming up with a compromise."}
{"id": "t3_1suix5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24M] with my ex [24F] I've turned into a crazy ex, how do I make things right?", "post": "[long back story here](\n\nMy girlfriend and best friend of 1 year dumped me about 3 months ago ('officially' 3 weeks ago), and it definitely put me into a tailspin. She thought we weren't compatible, that we fought too much, that I dragged her down, and that she didn't have feelings for me.... a whole myriad of reasons that surprise me. On top of that she wants to see another guy. The breakup was not mutual, and I did a lot of begging and pleading and convincing to try and give me a second chance. Lots of texts, emails, letters and phone calls. I really fought to make it work, but it was too late. She told me that it wasn't going to happen, and even if I continued to improve myself she could never see herself being with me due to emotional baggage. She said that I was a great guy and that she just wanted to be friends, but she couldn't handle the begging anymore. \n\nI really have no idea what to do, I'm really head over heals in love with this girl and i'm doing my best to separate entirely and move on. I initially tried being friends, but that was a serious mistake since it led to feelings of rejection and neglect. I've learned a lot from the break up and where we went wrong.... I've done a lot of self actualizing and I know that our situation is entirely different than when we lived together. I'm in a place where i'm capable of being a devoted boyfriend, and i'm certainly more confident and ambitious than when we were together. We've communicated much better since I moved out, and I consider us to be compatible. The problem is she's moved on and doesn't want me around, and I understand that. \n\nI guess I really just have no idea what the next step is... if I should be friends so I can prove myself to her or if I should just disappear. I might be delusional, but I really just have no idea what to do since this girl is a very important part of my life.", "summary": "bad breakup made me act insane, trying to \"make things right\" but i'm not sure if I can handle being friends"}
{"id": "t3_4718at", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Dating: Is my view on wanting my attention to be reciprocated skewed? [25 M]", "post": "I am a 25 Male.\n\nIf a woman is as intelligent and ambitious as I want her to be, she will see everything that I have to offer her and send me an indication of interest. I am tired of rolling out the red carpet, and I am tired of chasing.\n\nIf I ask a girl out on a date and she replies with anything other than \"yes\", or with solid concrete plans, I move on. I think that as I a man, I am socially obligated to make 'the first move'. Thats a given. But I think once I make that first move, if its not reciprocated then I lose interest. If I ask a girl \"when do you want to see me/when are we hanging out next\" and she dosnt give me a solid answer in the future, I stop pursuing. \n\nIf a girl dosnt reply to a text message, I'll text her one more time a day or two later and if she dosnt reply then I'll stop pursuing. \n\nI have never experienced a relationship in my entire life. But I think that its not wrong of me to expect that a partner be just as enthusiastic as you and with you every step of the way. I hear of men who have been in relationships because they chase and ask the same girl out over and over for weeks/years until they finally give in and they are married. \n\nAm I being too extreme? Should I still chase girls even after I made my intentions clear? I don't want to be in a relationship if I am doing more than 50% of the work... is this asking too much in modern times?", "summary": "Is it wrong for me to only want a partner who will 'date'/'pursue' me and reciprocate my attention?"}
{"id": "t3_1j1uxu", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "There is NOTHING special about that girl.", "post": "I don't know what it is with you two, but how is it that both my ex-boyfriend and my ex-flame-of-three-years and I end things and you both immediately make a beeline for this girl like she's water and you're dying in the desert.\n\nHer pseudointellectualism is the least of her worries. I'm not sure what's so wildly attractive about having a Bachelor's degree so worthless that you have to live at home and the only car you choose to drive is a crappy 80s Beemer because it's just hipster enough for you, but apparently, this girl is the fucking tits, because there isn't a picture on Instagram or a stupid, existential status on Facebook that the two of you haven't liked. You two boys don't even know each other, but your obvious worship of a girl who doesn't even give two shits that you exist is grinding on my nerves so endlessly that I'd rather claw my eyes out with a rusty spoon than continue to follow any of you on Instagram. \n\nSure, she's somewhat attractive, thanks due in part to her mother's full Spanish blood. Her skin tone is a naturally white girl caramel and while her hair is a normal shade of brown, you can't really beat those hazel eyes...here's a news flash, boys: *she's too tall for you.* She literally towers over both of you, even in her ugly Urban Outfitters lace up flats. Get a grip, you two. She's not into you, and you look pathetic.", "summary": "two guys from my past that I still have feelings for simultaneously constantly like statuses and Instagram pics from a girl we all know...and I'm jealous."}
{"id": "t3_34qywn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23/F] with my BF [24/M] of 3 & 1/2 years, doing great but I have a problem with our sex life", "post": "Hi reddit, long time stalker, first time poster.\nI've been with my boyfriend Luke for 3 & 1/2 years, and for the most part we have a fantastic relationship, he's very considerate of me and lets me have my own space if I need it. \nMy main problem is our sex life. We have sex on average five times a week, which I know is great, and I do enjoy sex with him - but he has never once in our whole relationship made me orgasm. Not once. \n\nI'm basically looking for your advice on how to broach this topic with him. See, I have faked it with him (and I know I shouldn't have), because I do feel like he's trying hard, just nothing ever works. I feel like this has basically been me lying to him for three years, because while I enjoy the sex we have it's not amazing for me ever. I feel like maybe if we try some new things (not too sure what but I'll figure that out later) or see a sex therapist it might change thigs for me?\n\nI know this might be the wrong subreddit for this issue but I really wanted to get some advice on how to bring this up with him, or if I should at all? I really just need some help on how to do this without hurting his feelings, because he's a great person and I don't want him to feel bad at all. Any help is gratefully accepted!!", "summary": "boyfriend and I have a regular but unfulfilling sex life, need advice on how to talk to him about it"}
{"id": "t3_l50pw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I know if I have a kidney stone or UTI?", "post": "I'm looking for advice and the quicker the better. Three Sunday's ago I had a bad pain in my lower back. I could hardly get out of the bed on the worse day. The pain was a solid 6-9 for seven days but went away. It then came back the following Wednesday for only a day but the pain was so bad I had to come home from classes. I've been to the doctor and he told me to get an IVP done because there was blood in my pee. So I went to the hospital and had that done. Doctor called me back saying there were no kidney stones in me this past Tuesday. \n\nWell now it's 5:00 AM And I can feel pain in my kidney slowly building up. This time when I went to the restroom I actually saw blood and it hurts more this time around to piss. I'm afraid I have a UTI and I really don't want to risk the chance of losing a kidney or my bladder because some doctor didn't see a stone. But what is holding me back from going to the hospital is the doctor said when the stone passes, my testicle is going to feel pain in it. I can feel that pain slowly increasing as well. Sorry if this post sounds awful, but I really don't want to pay for a hospital bill if I don't have to and I just copy pasted it from a different layout.", "summary": "how do i know if i have a kidney stone or uti? i've been to the doctor and he said he didn't see a stone but pain symptoms he mentioned reflect otherwise"}
{"id": "t3_1hji6i", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Need to talk again.", "post": "Same girl as before, different problem. \n\nStarted developing feelings for her and never really told her because I don't want it to affect our relationship. We're really close platonic friends and it's been that way since I've met her and I don't want that to change. Honestly just being her friend, listening to her talk, sitting next to her every day in class, gives me all the happiness in the world. I know she'll never see me as anything more than a friend and I've resigned myself to that fact. \n\nNot telling her that I like her though is killing me. I don't think she knows that I do like her, as nothing has changed between us at all.  It feels like I'm being dishonest about our relationship, but on the other hand I don't want her to be pushed away if I tell her. I'm her only close friend, up to the point that things that girls usually talk to amongst themselves, about boys, crushes, boy bands, whatever, are things that she talks to me about, despite the fact that I'm a straight heterosexual male. Argh. And now I'm rambling. Jesus. \n\nTo make it even better, this entire situation is made even more complicated by a friend of mine, who was previously unacquainted with said girl, has now professed an interest in her and it's reciprocated. Fuck. *Fuck.* I'm supportive on the outside, and I really am happy for both of my friends, it's just... fuck. I can't help but feel like I missed an opportunity. And I feel like I'm being selfish. \n\nBlah.", "summary": "Developed feels for very close friend. Doesn't want to confess said feelings. Said friend is now interested in another friend, who is receptive. *Fuck.*"}
{"id": "t3_akkgy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My best friend is blackmailing me, please help", "post": "Background: I'm female and in college, with no prior relationship experience.\n\nSo this fall I transferred to a school ~100 miles from my hometown. My best friend, we'll call her J, is stuck in a dead-end job and borderline abusive living situation, and was very resentful of me leaving. (I'd tried several times to get her out of there and into community college, but she never had the drive to do so.) She only started speaking to me again in November.\n\nA few weeks ago I started dating a guy I met through a different friend, and while it's far from serious, it's been going very well. Naturally I wanted to share this exciting new development with J, even if she's not really the girl-talk type. At first I got some good-natured ribbing about it, but then she turned hostile, saying I was desperate and turning into our mutual friend who cannot function without a boy in her life. (I dared express mild annoyance at having to wait over winter break to pick up where he and I had left off.)\n\nIn the past she has stalked and harassed both a celebrity and a guy we went to high school with, and she's already found my guy on facebook and has openly threatened to smother my relationship in its metaphorical cradle if I don't perform for her amusement like a trained monkey. I've asked her both nicely and not-so-nicely to leave him out of this, but she always counters with \"You know I'll do it.\" I'm not entirely sure the friendship is worth saving at this point. How do I get her to stop or just cut her from my life with as little danger to myself as possible?", "summary": "My friend is threatening to sabotage my relationship for her amusement, and I've realized I have never trusted her to have even basic human empathy. Now what?"}
{"id": "t3_19jx57", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Stupid Facebook and my(26/F) relationship of one year (32/M)", "post": "I'm so annoyed that this is even a problem. I noticed a month ago that my boyfriend's relationship status was changed to unlisted. It has been listed ever since we started dating a year ago. I decided to talk to him, and the conversation went as follows-\n\nIn bed for the night. Just turned out the lights. He rolls over and sees I'm staring at him and he can tell something is wrong.\n\nBF \"What?\"\n\nMe \"Why am I not listed as your girlfriend on facebook?\"\n\nBF \"You're not?\"\n\nMe \"No.\"\n\nBF \"Oh, well I must have accidentally changed it while trying to get FB to stop sending me tons of emails.\" Silence. \"Why? Are you worried?\"\n\nMe \"Well...it's changed. It's different.\"\n\nBF \"Do you want me to change it back?\"\n\nMe \"Yes...I just wanted to make sure there wasn't anything we needed to talk about.\"\n\nBF \"I didn't even know it had been changed.\"\n\nAfter some silence he said there was something unrelated that he had been wanting to talk to me about. He said he wanted to try to spend a little less time together. He isn't used to being with someone for so long and wanted to have a chance to do things that don't involve me. We work in the same building and live together, so I understand what he means. I've always made an effort to give him space, but he doesn't take advantage of it. I say I understand and would enjoy time away as well. He says he doesn't want to mess things up between us by being together constantly. I can understand that.\n\nHere's the problem. He still hasn't changed his facebook relationship status. Am I right for being concerned? Should I give him his space and freedom to not list his relationship status? I don't believe the change was an accident, and he saw how concerned it made me. I feel like I'm supposed to be taking the hint.", "summary": "My BF changed his FB profile so that it doesn't list his relationship status. He said he'd change it back, and he hasn't.  Should it bother me this much?"}
{"id": "t3_1deivk", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (26M) am falling for a long time friend(26F). She is in another country and might be falling for a guy she met there. I don't know what to do.", "post": "I (26M) and her (26F) met in college freshman year and became good friends. She was with someone at the time so I didn't really look at her that way.\n\nAfter we graduated she moved to another country to work. She broke up with her boyfriend. She got enganged later to another guy and broke it off since he cheated. Now she has been talking to anothe guy and she might be falling for him.\n\nThing is we really click. We think the same, we have the same goals, etc. I am falling for her. I think of telling her, but what is the point? We live apart, plus she might not have reciprocale feelings and that might destroy our friendship.\n\nBut I still think of telling her how I feel. Help?", "summary": "I am falling for a friend who lives in a another country. We click really well and I want to tell her how I feel."}
{"id": "t3_2pdm53", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "American Coradius International LLC sent a letter to me because of PayPal debt...", "post": "So I am currently 19 years old. A few years ago I use to do online graphic design, and would sell my products with the help of advertising on youtube, twitter, etc. Some people I would sell designs to could be really young. The problem is that after I would send the a file of the design they wanted to them, they would charge back the payment and keep the graphics I made as well as the money they were suppose to the pay. The problem with this is that since it was not a physical object, I could not prove I had ever sent anything. When I received money, I would send it straight into my checking account. Since PayPal can't touch my account, it would put me in debt if I got a charge back. My PayPal had been in debt for nearly 2 years before I received this letter. Will this cause any future problems? I don't feel as if I should be the one to pay it back. Not really sure what to do.", "summary": "I owe money to paypal because of a charge back that happened nearly 2 years ago. Got a letter recently from a debt collector. Not sure if I should be worried."}
{"id": "t3_3q7pt6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Help! My [24F] boyfriend [28M] is neglecting his studies and our relationship.... Because of a video game.", "post": "Hi Reddit. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and it has been great. Except for one thing.\n\nDOTA. He plays it at least 2 hours a day, and on the weekends, all day if he can. If you know that game you know it takes at least an hour on average per game and is one that you can't really pause. Sometimes it is fine that he plays, I don't mind sitting on my phone, browsing Reddit. However, lately it seems like it has interfered in our relationship as well as his studies. He is doing his PH.D. in Physics. He is obviously very swamped with schoolwork that he seems to put on the back burner for this game. The other day, on a Saturday, I was over and he was playing a game. I thought it would just be one but instead he proceeded to play for three hours as I just sat there. What can I do? I have tried talking to him... Even saying this game is making me rethink our relationship! He says he understands, but isn't proving it through his actions!\n\nReddit, what should I do? I really care about this guy and besides this gaming habit, our relationship is great!", "summary": "my boyfriend games whenever he can! How can I get him to stop gaming so much and focus more on school and our relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_2u953u", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Keep putting money in 403(b) or start a Roth IRA? (Also, is Roth the best option?)", "post": "Hi all,\n\nI'm a 28 year old teacher with moderately OK credit. I work in a state that is fortunate to pay its teachers reasonably well. I rent. I have a small emergency fund, am steadily paying off student loans, and am wanting to save more for retirement. Last year I saved 10,000 pre-taxed income in my school's 403(b) retirement vehicle with AXA-equitable. I'm liking AXA so far, no complaints.  Not sure if AXA is the \"best\" provider of a 403(b), but it's the only one offered by my school at the moment. \n\nI'm writing because I see a lot of chatter about the value of an IRA, I'm not sure what makes the most sense in the long run. My school does NOT offer matching funds, so all of the money in the 403(b) is my own. The max I could contribute is 17,500. This is more hypothetical because at the time I don't have hte finances to afford maxing out, but.... would it make better sense to divide my investment between the 403(b) and an IRA?", "summary": "not sure if I should just keep contributing to 403(b) as much as possible, start an IRA, and what % of income to invest in either/or.  Halp! "}
{"id": "t3_1hipn4", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I have a great pro-accountability idea, but no idea where to start a discussion about it!", "post": "A year ago I had a vague, pipe-dreamy idea for an interesting software project - a way of visually mapping politics in a procedural way. It got buried under the backend of my degree, until recently when I began to develop it as a commercial for-profit product. I am not a programmer in the slightest, but I've got a good idea of how this system might look, feel and function. I will explain more about this, but I'm posting for directions on where to look for people to get involved more than as a pitch.\n\nEven though I think this would work as a profitable, commercial product, it shouldn't be. It has to be free and open-source if it's really to meet its potential. I don't need to go through the various items of news that has led to the current climate of outrage against governments, but I will say that this has contributed to my decision to go open-source or nothing. I'm not sure I would be comfortable making money off this project, even though it will take skills, I think these exist in the public domain of willing volunteers.\n\nI realise I might end up explaining the whole thing, which is a big job, and I *will* do if necessary in an edit.", "summary": "I have an idea for a pro-accountability software project that I want to bring into the open, but don't know where to start."}
{"id": "t3_4vohno", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "My mother (F/45) has turned to food to cope with her stress.", "post": "This post is not meant to body shame, or make anyone feel insecure about their weight. I'm just worried for my mother.\n\nMy mother works a very high paced stressful job, on top of that, she's going back to school. When she's not working her long hours at her job, (she works overtime all the time, she can't say no to her work or else she feels somehow guilty) she is slaving away at her desk writing long essays. She gets very little sleep, and often pulls all nighters to complete her essays. Through all this stress, she has put on about 20 pounds, and was not \"thin\" before that. My mother has taken to food to cope with her stress. Cookies in the morning, high calorie meals at night, I'm very worried my mother is going to eat herself sick. My whole family is getting concerned, and my other parent confided in me that she is becoming increasingly depressed. How do I talk to my mom, without offending her, that I'm worried about her weight? She often calls herself a \"fat cow\" or a \"whale\", my goal isn't to make her feel insecure, but if she keeps eating like this she WILL get sick. How do I approach this as kindly as gently as I can while getting my point across? Any advice is welcomed.", "summary": "My mother's stress has caused her to turn to food, how do I tell her I'm worried about her weight without sounding like an asshole?"}
{"id": "t3_smoq9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I get rid of a person I banned from my website?", "post": "Reddit, I need some help.  I own a small to medium website where the main attraction are some forums and some sub-forums.  This is also a business as I sell items on it.  I also make money by having sponsors and stuff like that.\n\nThe problem is a guy I have banned repeatedly keeps re-registering for the forums.  I have asked him not to re-register and told him he is no longer welcome on my site.  I have told him not to come back.  I have blocked his IP but he gets around this easily with Onion, proxies, and just resetting his IP.  I cannot block a block of IP addresses.  I've tried this before and it blocked good paying customers.\n\nWhen I look at my IP logs, I can usually tell when it's him or someone else I don't want on the site.  The IP is out of the normal geographic area I deal with.  He is good for a few weeks (if I'm lucky) and then turns back into a shithead.  As far as I know (and I have checked) he has never tried to hack or manipulate my website.  He has never done anything malicious.  He's just a pest.\n\nMy question is, what else can I do about this?  Is there anything I can do legally?  Such as a lawsuit or even have him arrested?  The way I see things is if I had a brick and mortar store and a person came in harassing my customers, I could have him arrested for trespassing if he wouldn't leave.  Can I do the same thing with an internet based store?  He ordered stuff from me years ago and I still have what I believe is his address so contacting his local police would be easy.  I really don't want to/can't do a lawsuit either because I don't have any damages except the time it wastes for me to ban him.\n\nYou guys have any ideas?  Any legal retribution?", "summary": "Guy keeps registering on my website after I banned him.  Need a way to get rid of him and want to try legal measures"}
{"id": "t3_3797d5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my [25 F] 6 years, she seems to hate my friends", "post": "To preface, in most cases my girlfriend is a sweetheart. She always goes out of her way for me and thinks about me. I love her for that. I get along really well with her friends.\n\nMy issues stem from the way she treats MY friends. My guy friends typically need to roll the dice as to whether or not they are in her favor. Right now they are, but earlier in the relationship they were the devil. My friends that are girls can't catch a break. They do nothing to offend her (even going out of their way to be nice) and yet they are nailed to the wall for ANY slight towards my girlfriend. I wanted to say jealousy, but most of them are in happy relationships and things are totally plutonic for the rest.\n\nI've tried talking to her about it but she tells me that they've done \"horrible things\", (not necessarily to her) and that I'm always taking their side against her opinion. It's made my outlook on things really sour, as it's extremely difficult to have her hanging around with my friends.\n\nMy friends have basically all told me in private that it's ok if I bring her around, it just puts a downer on the night. I hang otu with them without her now, but I get complaints from her that I spend more time with them than her.", "summary": "My girlfriend has caused issues with my friends and now my relationship seems strained, but I love her. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3hrq76", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my wife [26 F] of a year, just found out she slept with her new boss a few years ago. She can't help that it's her boss, but I'm having a hard time trying not to feel weird about it.", "post": "She starts a job in less then a week. She got a call from her soon to be boss and sort of walked out of the room. When I asked about it she seemed a little off so I pressed the subject. Turns out she slept with this guy a few years ago (before we started dating.) She says it was a one time thing and it was a mistake and that she doesn't find him attractive or even interesting. \n\nHe just got the job a couple of weeks ago and I know it's totally out of her control, but I can't help but feel weird about the whole situation. She's going to be working really closely with this guy for the foreseeable future and her job just by its nature has her working really late all of the time. \n\nI have no reason not to trust her, but it's difficult to not get that sick feeling in my gut when I think about it. I've told her this and she got really defensive.\n\nAdvice?", "summary": "Wife starts a new job in a few days, turns out she slept with her new boss a few years ago. Trying not to feel weird about the whole situation. "}
{"id": "t3_3r0hho", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28M] hooked up with my best friend's [28M] sister [25F].", "post": "I've been best friends with \"Andy\" over 10 years.  We both moved across the country from our hometown 8 years ago.  We don't head home very often so I don't see his family much.\n\nThis past week we were in our hometown for a friend's wedding.  It was amazing.  Around the beginning of the evening, his sister and I started chatting.  We both work in finance so it was a lot of dorky work stuff, but we kind of clicked.  It was a little weird, as I've kind of known her for a while but I guess I saw her a little differently that night.  We ended up spending nearly the whole night together, dancing, chatting, and laughing.  As the wine continued to flow, we ended up getting a little touchy before we went back to my hotel so he likely heard something about what happened.\n\nIt was pretty great.  Had brunch together the next day before we parted ways.  We've been messaging a little bit since then, nothing too crazy, but flirty for sure.\n\nMy questions are: \n\n-Do I have to have the conversation with my buddy and tell him what happened with his sister?  \n\n-I kid of want to pursue a relationship with is sister.  She is planning on moving to my city once she finishes the final exam for her designation.  (This has been the case for a while btw, not like some \"oh yeah i'll totally move to your city\" pillow talk)  Can I do this?  How do I even approach it?  Do I tell him first or do I let things happen with the sister and tell him after it's more in stone?\n\nI normally have a pretty good head on my shoulders when it comes to relationship type stuff, but I could really use some advice here.", "summary": "Hooked up with best friend's sister after wedding.  Kind of want to pursue relationship.  Can I pull this off?  How the hell do I do this?"}
{"id": "t3_168jcb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22/f] My family acts disrespectfully towards my [22/m] boyfriend. What's the best thing to do in this situation?", "post": "Been together 3 years, living together for 1.5 years. I'm Persian, he's white. My family will invite me (and him by extension) to family events such as birthdays, Shabbat, etc. My boyfriend (let's call him Z) has been treated disrespectfully by them in the past. Examples include them speaking in Farsi in front of him, turning away when Z was going to shake their hand, etc. Z feels that it is a cultural issue that will resolve itself if we give it time. I want to take action but don't know what action to take. We could not attend any events in silent protest but it's not guaranteed that anyone will ask why we continuously don't attend (my family seems to not care a lot about what I have to say). We could attend most events so that the issue eventually resolves itself but I don't want Z to feel uncomfortable while at the events. So... What's the best option here? Speak up, do nothing, something else entirely? So far we have been attending some events but not all.", "summary": "Cultural differences make it difficult for my Persian family to treat my non-Persian boyfriend with respect. Should I/we speak up, stay silent, or what?"}
{"id": "t3_532hl4", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "TSH level variation and suggestions for possible medical tests", "post": "In June I took a blood test in Belgium, which among other things checked for TSH levels. The level was 2.9. A month later I took another blood test in my home country, Norway (I'm an expat), which had a score of 1. Both tests were taken at around 11 AM, with no food beforehand (don't know if this is relevant at all). Should the TSH level vary this much? The ranges were the same at both laboratories (0.3 - 4.2). The latter laboratory also tested for Free T4 and Anti-TPO, which came back normal (16 (range: 11 - 22) and 97 (range 50 - 150) respectively). \n\nBackground info:\n\n26 year old Caucasian male, approximately 70 kg, 182 cm. Not taking any medications. Blood pressure 133/86, taken this Monday. Symptoms in no particular order:\n\n* Night sweats which usually come in \"clusters\", occurring about three to four nights in the span of about two weeks. I can then have a month or two without it happening.\n* Frequent bowel movements (at least four times per day)\n* Panic attacks at varying intervals", "summary": "Is it normal for the TSH level to vary as much as this? I would also greatly appreciate any suggestions for other possible diagnoses which I can ask my doctor about when I see him next week"}
{"id": "t3_s900o", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "High School relationship advice needed", "post": "I'd post in teen relationships, but it seems pretty dead. \n\nAnyway, I'm a 15-year-old female and am currently a freshmen in high school. I don't consider myself unattractive, but I'm also not gorgeous.\n\nNever had a boyfriend before, but I'm really into this one guy. We sit by each other at lunch everyday and speak frequently in Spanish class. He seems pretty into me as well, but I'm shit at reading guys, so I have no idea (He's also pretty damn flirtatious with a handful of other girls). \n\nThere's a school dance coming up and my other friends have been pushing him to ask me to it. He gets really embarrassed when they do this and vehemently denies liking me, even going as far as to explicitly state that it will never happen on one of my friend's facebook walls (girls can indeed be friendzoned, lol).  \n\nHe seems a little more reluctant to speak with me since they started doing this, but I can't tell if that's because he's embarrassed about liking me or he just flat out doesn't like me. I'm close with some of his friends and they say he might like me. They could be trolling me though. \n\nI'm new to dating. What should I do? I'm scared I might kill our friendship if I bring it up. Any feedback would be appreciated.", "summary": "15, female, got a serious crush on a guy who I thought might like me. My friends pestered him about asking me out. He got really defensive. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3ekxrr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (24M) live-in GF(25F) has asked for space, need advice.", "post": "Some Background: We have been dating for 3 years, 2 living together. Before that we were best friends who were too afraid to say how we felt to each other for a year. \n\nWe moved to a new city together a year ago, and are due to start a new lease we signed less than a month ago. I have been working 2 part time jobs and going to grad school (with another unpaid internship as well). I decided to go to grad school so I could give her the kind of life I know that she deserves. \n\nI love this girl with all my heart, and 5 days ago she says she feels like we are back to being just friends. She then asked for space to figure things out. The only thing is we live together, and besides me living in the basement at my own house, I don't see how else to give her space.\n\nKnowing she is only 30 feet away from me while I am in the same house is killing me. Now I know for sure she is the one I want my future to be with, how can I let her know these things while at the same time trying to give her the space she needs?", "summary": "My girlfriend says she feels like friends, and needs space, how can I give her that while we both live under the same roof?"}
{"id": "t3_e545z", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, you help so many people. Could you please help me re-unite with my long lost teddy bear?", "post": "When I was a kid (6 years old) my grandpa went to America and brought me a teddy bear as a gift. I fell in love with him instantly and brought him everywhere I went. I had clothes for him (even some knitted by my mom). My parents even bought him a little backpack and I used to pack him the same stuff I packed in mine for school (little books labeled \"math\" and such). I used to think of him as my pal and everybody knew him at my school (even the teachers, and they also loved him). \n\nOne sad day, when I was 12, I went out to the swimming pool with my grandpa and on the way back I realized I didn't have him anymore. We frantically looked everywhere, but he was gone. We went back to the swimming pool but could not find him. I became a very sad little kid. I put some signs around the neighbourhood but people only laughed at me (which I can now understand a bit). The next 2 years, my mom and dad travelled to America as well (for family reasons) and looked for \"Sito\" (the teddy bear's name I invented) with no success. \n\nThe Christmas after, my grandpa, seeing me so sad, found a teddy bear which was similar (not really) and gave it to me with a letter from Santa saying that \"he (Sito) went to the North Pole to meet him (Santa) and to have a change of looks\". Of course I knew the truth but I appreciated my grandpa doing that for me.  \n\nNowadays (I'm 28 now) I have (maybe not) got over it, but I still look in ebay every now and then just in case. Until it occured to me that maybe Reddit could help me. It's been more than 15 years but it's worth a try.", "summary": "I lost my very loved teddy bear as a kid and I need reddit to help me re-unite with him.  "}
{"id": "t3_2i2h81", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] with my GF [33 F] 8 years together, she things her family will think of her turning her back on them if she moves out", "post": "My gf and I have been together 8 years and she's lived at home with her parents all  her life. Her parents are super traditional and the very thought of her even staying the night with me upsets them. She has lied for the last 6 years saying she was at her friends house so we could have some time together.  They know we plan on getting engaged and eventually married.  My gf and I are falling into depression due to not being able to live together along with other issues outsider our relationship.\n\nWe've been on many trips together and are completely happy and care free when we are together, but lately not living together is really making us unhappy.\n\nI want to tell her she just needs to move in with me, but I don't want to be thought of as disrespecting her parents. I know at this age and the devotion we have to each other it's nonsense for us not to live together, but I don't know how to get her to break through that wall and tell her parents that we are moving in together.\n\nOne of our biggest issues is the loss of friends over the years. When we started dating we each had a good pool of friends but over the years those friends have just about abandoned us for various reasons.\n\nI feel it's almost impossible to propose even though it's all i think about. I depresses me that I would have to propose and then we'd have to go our separate ways after the proposal instead of enjoying the big step in our lives together.", "summary": "Gf of 8 years can't bring herself to move out of her parents house and in with me in fear of turning her back on her parents."}
{"id": "t3_2z7e4m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22F] feel terrible about something I did that is probably pretty minor. Should I tell my boyfriend [25M] about it?", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. I have had minor crushes in the past and I have told him about them, and he was okay with it. A few months ago I developed a crush on a guy in my classes. I looked him up on Facebook and saw that he liked one of my favorite bands. I have one of their band t-shirts and I like to wear it out in public because I love when someone makes a positive comment about it. I was excited when I saw that he liked the band and decided to wear it to class. I wanted to talk to him about the band because I was excited to meet someone who likes it, but I guess a part of me also wanted him to be impressed/attracted to me. I would NEVER do anything remotely romantic or sexual with him, though. \n\nHe didn't notice, so I wore the shirt again a few weeks later. He noticed that time and complimented me on the shirt, and I immediately felt extremely guilty and basically cut off the conversation after saying \"it's one of my favorite bands.\" I feel like I cheated in some way and I've been beating myself up over it for weeks. Should I tell my boyfriend about this, or do you think it's too minor of a situation/it would do more harm than good?", "summary": "Wore a band t-shirt to sort of impress someone I have a crush on but I am also in a long-term relationship. I feel very guilty. Should I tell my boyfriend?"}
{"id": "t3_3z8p81", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my friend[19F] Good spontaneous thing/date to do with her after not seeing in a while HELP There is some good tension in the air", "post": "Ok so recently this chick from high school and I started talking again its been a couple days now since initiation. Weve hooked up and been to several parties together and there was defs something there (she was a schooling year below me). \n\nWeve been texting and shit sharing some nostalgia and all but wanna get a date going. Should i just ask her if she wants to come down to the beach with some wine lol? i mean the worst thing that could happen she says no. \n\nBasically anyone else been in a similat scenario ? what happened? you can ask more on the situation shes just smoking if you know what i mean.", "summary": "get a date/fling going on again with a girl from high school ( this is my first post here cheers)"}
{"id": "t3_52cuxt", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I can't stand my girlfriend's mum.", "post": "So my girlfriend's mum has anxiety (pretty bad from what I know), however, she's also still a responsible parent for 3 children. She abuses my girlfriend by saying things such as \"you're the worst thing to happen to me in the world\" and abuses her for moving away with me. If my girlfriend disagrees with her on anything she then gets verbally abusive again. \n\nNow, me and my girlfriend of 4 years live together, and have been relatively happy, but my girlfriend gets incredibly upset at me whenever I get angry about something her mum does. For example, her mother recently suggested just \"dumping\" her 3 children to go live with a love interest in another country. \n\nMost recently, her mother was staying in our apartment and was supposed to leave at a designated time in order to arrive for a plane. I stayed home from university (because I don't feel comfortable leaving someone alone in my house and my girlfriend was at work) so I could make sure the house was locked up when I left. However, her mum constantly complained she was going to miss her flight (I assured her if she left soon she most certainly would not), to which she rung her boyfriend, made herself a coffee and sat down for a chat, whilst still complaining she was going to miss the flight. She didn't leave for another 2 hours and prevented me from leaving. \n\nI vented about this to my girlfriend to which I was told I was \"being a f***head\" about. I'm considering removing myself from this altogether, as in breaking up and moving out as she can't understand my anger towards her mother or tolerate it at any stage and I don't feel it's my place to force someone to cut off their mother.", "summary": "My girlfriend's abusive mother is affecting my relationship and my girlfriend won't cut her off even though we have our own place. Should I simply leave?"}
{"id": "t3_14aoaq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (19f) repeatedly lied/hid things from my boyfriend (22) of 7months.", "post": "We've been together since late April. Before that, we were friends, and then friends with benefits, for a couple months. In early March, I hooked up (kissing and above clothes touching) with a coworker,who had a girlfriend, after work. Note that I hooked up with my fwb, now boyfriend, earlier that evening. \n\nFast forward a few days, I went to the beach with my guy and told him what happened. He was pretty miffed. He ended up telling me that his ex created on him repeatedly and lied constantly. She hurt him. Badly. Really fucking badly. He told me he would never and could never be with another girl like that. \n\nI am that girl. I've hid things and lied about things for 7 months. Mostly just things related to the night I hooked up with the dude from work, because I was ashamed of them and didn't want to hurt my boyfreind/seem like a whore. \n\nBut I lied. I have now \"come clean\" to my bf about all of the details of that night. But we've reached a breaking point. He even called me by his ex's name, and told me that he thinks of us as the same. \n\nYesterday, we decided to try the fuck buddies thing, and leave the relationship stuff behind. But today, we're still talking about relationship stuff, namely my lies. I have told him everything that happened. He says he still feels like I'm \"holding things back,\" but I am not. \n\nHow can I, a habitual liar, show the one person I care about most that I am being truthful? How can I make it up to him?", "summary": "I lied to my boyfriend, a lot. Then lying is over. How can I prove this/make it up to him?"}
{"id": "t3_2rtbcr", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "New to the sub... read my story please! Suggestions wanted.", "post": "Here's the back story l. I got married in June. Both sets of parents have been married for 25+ years, and all three sets of grandparents have been married 55+ years. My wife's other set of grandparents unfortunately have passed away, but had 54 years of marriage when the first of them passed. \n\nI don't know what led to the conversation, but essentially or parents added up all of the years that everyone had been married and it ends up being about 275 years. \n\nPoint is, as part of our wedding present,  they gifted us $275, one dollar for each year of marriage for all of those people. Each year on our anniversary,  they will give us $275 plus the five extra dollars per year for anniversaries for the five couples. \n\nAnyway,  we want to put it away and start saving it for our kids college or something. We have looked at several different investment options,  but haven't been able to settle upon one.", "summary": "What is the best possible long term investment for our money. Can be slow growing,  and we definitely don't want it all to be placed in a high risk scenario. This is a 20+ year decision. "}
{"id": "t3_3ckrld", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with my girfriend [22F] 8 months, kept a secret from me", "post": "My girlfriend and I were on a date yesterday when she had to get something off her chest.\n\nShe said that I am not her second guy (sex) that shes been with. There were two others before me.\n\nShe wanted to be honest with me and I was hurt that she kept this the whole time. I thought we had open communication this whole time.\n\nI respect that she wanted to tell me but I would have either wanted to know from the beginning to know what I was getting myself into or just never know.\n\nI cried because it hurt when this whole time I thought we were each other second partner. \n\nShe had sex with 2 other guys in between her ex and me. she said she was angry and felt like giving up on dating until a mutual friend introduced us. \n\nShe keeps telling me that I am perfect for her and surprised that how I treat like no other guy before. Which I am glad at what i'm doing is right because before it was not appreciated. \n\nI feel like marrying her one day but this idk of our relationship will be the same. \n\nI want things to be the same before she told me. Like I wish I could forget about it.\n\nWhat to do? Did I overreacted?", "summary": "GF told me that she has sex with 2 other guys in between her ex and me but told me a while later/What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_33xyxh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My partner [19M] does not want children but I [19F] might do and I can't stop thinking about it", "post": "My partner and I have been together for over two years. In the beginning of our relationship we were both happy with the idea of one day having children. However at some point last year my boyfriend suddenly changed his mind about it. He says he doesn't want children and he doesn't really like them (he really dislikes babies). He says there is a possibility he will change his mind in the future but it's more likely that he won't.\n\nNow I haven't really decided whether or not I want children - the idea seems nice but I have to take into consideration whether or not I'd be able to cope with them mentally (I have depression which can sometimes severely affect my mood and interaction with other people). There is also a chance that I will be happy to go without children in the future. But I guess I just always assumed I would have them.\n\nHe tells me I don't need to worry about this yet as it's far in the future and not currently relevant, and although he's right, I can't stop thinking about it. I just wish he was more open on the idea so it didn't play on my mind so much. We want to get engaged at some point soon but I don't want to actually get married before we've come to some sort of conclusion on this. It doesn't have to be a definite yes or no but it just feels so vague right now and I don't want to push myself into a situation which would make me unhappy.\n\nI'd like some advice on anything really. I don't want to leave him over it because I think at the age of 19 when I haven't even fully decided what I want myself it would be silly, and everything else in our relationship is great. I wish it didn't bother me so much but I can't help but think about it often, I don't like uncertainty.", "summary": "My partner doesn't want children and is currently unlikely to change his mind and I probably do want them, however we're only 19 and this is currently not an issue so should I be worrying about it now?"}
{"id": "t3_43ivd5", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My [25f] boyfriend [23M] never wants to do anything", "post": "3 months ago I moved across the country to live with my boyfriend of 2 years (we were in a LDR). I have no friends and family here. everything is ok and all but we've been bumping heads a lot lately when it comes to going out and spending time together. My boyfriend works a hard 50 hrs a week as a diesel mechanic. he wakes up at 5am and doesn't get home till about 6-7pm. he is also a Sergent for the army reserves so he has more responsibilities than just the diesel job. he has off (most) weekends. I have a boring job as a security officer. I work 12 hours shifts but I only do 3 days a week. I also do some extra work on the side to bump my hours up to 40+ a week. I usually leave work with a lot of energy to do stuff but I don't bother my boyfriend during the week because I know he is tired and just wants to relax. On weekdays I keep myself occupied.\n\nby Saturday, I am restless to spend time with my boyfriend but all he wants to do is stay at home and play video games. I ask him why he never wants to do anything and he says because he works hard all week and all he wants to do during the weekends is relax at home. ok but... when will there be time for us??? He says when he takes some vacation time off we can do things.\n\nDoes that sound normal to you? Not doing anything at all with your SOs unless on special snowflake occasions? I get that he works hard but I also think he should put some effort into the relationship too. are my feeling validated or an I just being a high maintenance girlfriend?", "summary": "boyfriend works long/hard hours and never wants to go out because of this. I'm dying to go out with him. what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_5000gj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] am in an toxic/abusive relationship [22 F], advice?", "post": "I have been with my partner for just under 3 years now and we have spent almost that entire time living together. We both suffer from generalized anxiety disorder but can generally find a common ground, however there have been many, many times were my partner becomes outright caustic if she's feeling bad about /whatever/.\n\nHard day at work? I cop abuse. Something doesn't go the way she wants? I cop abuse. She feels bad about herself? I cop abuse. I do something differently from exactly how she wants it? I cop abuse.\n\nWhile I say abuse I don't mean she's physically harming me, but she'll specifically go out of her way to make me feel like whatever I do is wrong, or that I personally am responsible for her bad mood which /severely/ affects my mental health. I've brought this up with her countless times and told her that she needs to work with me, rather than grind against me, but her go-to coping mechanism for anything she finds extraneous is to take it out on me.\n\nWe both acquired our anxiety disorders' from our dysfunctional parents' and while I can recognise when she's using their example to cope, she seems wholly incapable of recognizing how her mood affects how she acts to the extent that no matter what the circumstances are, I will always be the \"enemy\".\n\nMy parents dysfunction severely impacted my ability to willingly harm anyone so I am a bit of a push over in the sense that when someone is hurting me I don't hurt them back...but surely there is a way to reach my partner besides outright slapping some sense into her. I love my partner despite all the harm she's caused me and truly believe that there is a resolution to this besides saying \"kthxbai\".", "summary": "my SO can't understand her own emotions and continuously uses how she feels as an excuse to hurt me rather than coming to me for help/support but I love her and need her in my life, advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2ckwfs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (20f) girlfriend of 7 months (20f) and her mom (46f) hate eachother and they are making me sick", "post": "I love my gf and I love her family (brother, dad, mom)  too. They are good people but they fight about 4-5 times a week. The thing is , everytime my gf fights with her mom, she comes to me and tells me (texts)  the whole thing and how she feels about the fight and her mom and THATS NORMAL because shes my gf, but I start to get frustrated when her mom texts me too. She  complains about my gf and tells me how horrible and cruel her daughter is (it makes me so angry)\n\n I usually take my gfs side because her mom is really disfunctional at times, I've tried to speak to her mom and she won't listen. It's her way or no way. \n\nYesterday they texted me at the same time and they were freaking out and saying horrible things about eachother and I felt sick and angry and I went to bed really nervous. \n\nMy family is really relaxed and we fight about 1-2 times every two months, and usually we solve everything in less than an hour. Their relationship is bringin ME down and when they  turn to me everytime they fight at the SAME time it literally ruins my whole day and puts me in the worst mood.\n\nI tried everything because I really want her mom to stop and i dont want to get affected by their relationship: i took the mothers side once, i took my gfs side, i told them to go to therapy (they are still going and nothing happens) i even ignored them once and they kept bombing my phone, i told my gf how i felt, etc.\n\nI dont think I'm emotionally weak, but people i love can take my peace away in seconds. \n\nI want to be always there for my gf because shes beyond perfect but I want to remain sane.\n\nAm I wrong or selfish for feeling like this? I really dont know how to deal with them in a healthy way.\n\n(My mother -in-law is texting me again, right now, ahgggggg)", "summary": "My girlfriend and her mom have a bad relationship and they always put me in the middle. They (mostly the mom) expect me to take a side and participate. I dont want to, it makes me sick."}
{"id": "t3_ptvw2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What were some of the most interesting things you've seen on a camera SD card that you've found?", "post": "So this story starts during a cleaning expedition of my college dorm room. When moving the dresser I discovered an all black SD card or a reasonable size (no longer in my possession. I cannot remember the exact number). Being the Curious George that I am I decided to delve into the contents. One of the things that stood out the most and I can still recall to this day is a \"striptease\" (no nudity involved) video a girl did where she pranced around and proceeded to take off TWELVE layers of shirts before getting tired although it seemed as if she had more.", "summary": "Found SD card while cleaning. Had a video of a girl dancing as she took off 12 shirts. What about you?"}
{"id": "t3_kgu2k", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dirty Xbox and 360 Controllers", "post": "Would anyone have any interest in a product like this?\n\nOnce Upon a time I had an Idea to make a cleaning kit for the Xbox and", "summary": "Its an awesome Care package Looking controller cleaning kit. It Looks awesome on your desk and has tools and cleaning stuff inside to clean your controllers and open them up if there is something stuck inside."}
{"id": "t3_24ccmg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22M] have been on 3 dates since meeting a girl [22] online about 2 months ago now.", "post": "Edit: Oops. I'm 23.\n\nWe met online about 2 months ago and it just seems to me like things should be going faster than this.\n\nWent on the first date maybe 2 months ago and it was pretty great but we've only been on 2 more dates since then. The last was the Saturday night/ Easter Sunday morning and we kissed/made out for a minute and that was really great but it doesn't seem to me that she has any time to meet again. We've literally only seen each other for a total of like 5hrs but I feel we have great conversations and I don't think I'm completely out of bounds in saying that we both find each other attractive.\n\nI texted her last Monday (the day after Easter) I believe and asked if she wanted to hang out again this past weekend and she seemed open to it but prefaced it that this is a very busy time (finals). We haven't talked on the phone at all and while I've texted her just about every or every other day she doesn't seem to respond as much. Should I just text her and tell her that I really liked the time we spent together so far and that I'd like to do it again when she has time or maybe I've been texting her too much/am always available(in a bad way)?\n\nIf it hasn't become clear I am quite inexperienced in all of this dating stuff. She's the first person I've been on a 2nd or 3rd date or even kissed in more than 5 years. So if you just tell me to relax and be patient or just communicate my feelings to her somehow then I will completely understand. Thanks!", "summary": "3 dates in 2 months. Is she just slow/busy or not wanting to see me again? What do?"}
{"id": "t3_hmu59", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "An experiment in nature versus nurture...", "post": "And no, I don't experiment on my dogs.\n\nMy wife and I have fostered and rescued around 20 dogs over the past 8 years. We have 3 dogs that are ours, and right now we're dogsitting for my sister (who adopted our first real rescue.) We're also dogsitting for a friend of ours who adopted 3 of our rescues who had to take an emergency business trip to Columbia (and no, not for that white powder type of business.)\n\nSo right now we have 7 dogs in our house, but we've done that once before and can handle it.\n\nThe real story comes from last summer, when we rescued a mom and her pup from the crawl space of a house that was due to be demolished later that week. We kept the pup, who is one of our core three, and the mom went to live with our friend, and is one of the 4 we're now dogsitting.\n\nThe mom is some kind of husky/akita mix, but is relatively small for her size, coming in around 50 pounds. The son has that in him, as well as 50% German Shepherd and is huge, almost 100 lbs. \n\nWhat's amazing is that we've had this pup since he was 3 months and we haven't had mom around in a year. Up until we had them domesticated, both dogs were essentially feral. \n\nThe similarities in how they behave is uncanny; the way they reach out for affection, how to crawl onto the bed to cuddle, nuzzle up for a pet, and follow us around to make sure we're OK. It's all identical and different than how our other dogs act.", "summary": "Feral mom and son pup were separated a year ago. When observed, their mannerisms are nearly identical when it comes to snuggling and affection even though they've been raised in different households."}
{"id": "t3_2pywkc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] really like my friend [17F] and I have never really asked a girl out before.", "post": "I'm a 20 year old guy (in Australia) and I've only had one girlfriend in my life (when I was 14). There is this one girl that I met about 8 months ago that I have really taken a liking to. I've only actually seen her a few times but we talk on Facebook a bit and she seems really great. I'm a bit worried about ruining our friendship as she is friends with a lot of my friends and I don't want anything to go wrong there.\n\nI've never really been on a proper date or anything before and have no idea how to ask. Even if it wasn't with this girl I'm at a stage in my life where I feel I am ready to start dating but I am rather shy and not sure how to approach girls (I see guys that can just strike up conversations without any effort but I just fall apart).\n\nThe girl in question is a Christian (like me) and I have absolutely no clue whatsoever if she is interested in me in the slightest (she might only talk to me to be polite).\n\nI seem to find myself in the 'friendzone' and I am regularly told by older girls (I have a few female friend 24 and above) that I'm a great guy, really nice and mature etc. and apparently I'm reasonably attractive (I'm not movie star but I have a reasonably athletic build and no particularly ugly features).\n\nAny adivice on what to do with this girl, or girls in general, would be really appreciated. I am completely clueless when it comes to this sort of thing. I'm told that girls are generally pretty open to being asked out and actually giving guys a chance but I just don't know how to get there.", "summary": "I like a girl, no idea how to approach it. Even if she's not interested, I'm ready to start dating but don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2yoska", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Interesting reaction friend (26F) to my (26F) coming out", "post": "I (26F) lately 'discovered' that I am gay. I actually knew for about ten years, but I ignored my feelings and had a relationship of six years with a guy. I couldn't pretend any longer, the relationship ended last year and I finally could accept my preferences. Next thing was to tell my family and friends. I've told my closest family and three friends of mine. All were kind of surprised, which I can understand, but the reaction of one friend (26F; from high school) was a bit peculiar... \n\nI knew it would be a bit of a gamble to tell her because she is very Christian. But I thought: if she really is my friend, it shouldn't bother her. Moreover, we don't talk that much (she isn't my closest friend or anything; we just like to catch up a few times a year). Still, about three months later, her reaction continues to bother me a bit. I genuinely think she thinks her reaction was nice, and I also told her I appreciated her reaction, but the more I think about it the more I doubt if I do. Some of her words:\n\n-\tI don't know if you will end up in hell because your sin might not be worse than the sins of others. (Apparently, I am committing a sin.)\n-\tGod can change everything if he wants. Maybe tomorrow you will not be gay anymore, if he wants so. (It took me ten years to accept my feelings, so this hurt a bit and obviously it's bullshit)\n-\tI don't know if you should act on your feelings. You can have these feelings, but it might not be good to start a relationship with a girl. You can be happy alone as well. But she also said she wanted me to experience the happiness she has with her husband. Of course you can/need to be happy on your own, but that doesn't mean I should be forever alone just because of the fact that I like girls, right?\n\n \nWhat do you guys think of her reaction? Shouldn't it bother me because she really believes she spoke kind words? I don't agree with her, also because I am not Christian, but still, I don't know what to think.", "summary": "I told my Christian friend I like girls instead of boys and I'm not sure I like her reaction. What to think/do?"}
{"id": "t3_15yr9o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "1 I [29m] have been seeing this [25f] who says she's confused about dating", "post": "I met this girl back in early November, and ever since, we've been talking to each other everyday. She always wishes me good night before sleeping, and I always respond the next day with good morning.\n\nTo give a little more background on her, she broke up with her boyfriend of 2 years about half a year ago, and ever since, she's been doing a lot of dating.\n\nEarlier this week, she told me she didn't want to be exclusive, and she's been seeing somebody else. Then, yesterday, she told me she liked me, but she thought I had too much experience. She followed this up by saying that she hasn't explored life or anything she wants and she's never been single so she's confused on dating. I think she's absolutely adorable in every way.\n\nOne more thing to note is that our relationship has been all through text messages. She lives a little bit aways and we've never been able to meet up because of bad timing and stuff. Though, we have tentative plans to have dinner next Thursday.\n\nReddit, what should I do?", "summary": "I [29m] am seeing this [25f] and she's confused about dating. She says she's been seeing another guy, but also that she likes me."}
{"id": "t3_4q8lgg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I [F/26] relate with coworkers after being informed I have a month left on the job?", "post": "Though this might be a question for r/jobs, it also seems to fall in the relationship category since I'm unsure how to relate to my coworkers now. I've been on contract for the past 2.5 years. My contract was recently extended to November so I thought I had a bit more time left. I was just told that my last day will be one month from now. After processing the news for the day I'm unsure the best way to proceed socially and even professionally for now. My team had about 5 people and I was the only contract. We all got on. Hung out outside of work. One mentored me weekly for a time. My boss is another story. He came on new, right when I was about to transition from contract to hire, and stopped that process, kept me contracted and I'm well sure it's he who terminated me early. I have contempt for him. Do I now go on as normal and carry myself with the dignity of a professional? Do I continue to attend the weekly team meeting even though my work is being poised for a handoff to a new hire who will replace me? Or do I keep true to the understanding that I no longer add value and begin to mentally cut off from my department and do my least while putting my all into a job search? I know that's a bad idea for my reputation. When I know something is not going to work out in a relationship the fastest way to get over it and start anew for me is an immediate break, let the person down, then no contact. I figure that's not the best in business but it's what I'm inclined to do to move on--cease communication, possibly no goodbye letter or one to very select people. New to business and figuring out the best way to manage the exit. How much will my actions here matter in the future?", "summary": "Just got let down with a month's notice. Unsure how to wrap up my business and part with my coworkers whom I've built amicable rapports with. Contempt for boss is coloring my appreciation for them."}
{"id": "t3_30ls74", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [36M] with my girlfriend [26 F] 7 months because of fear, feel I've made a mistake", "post": "Never posted to reddit before, but have found myself in a relationship predicament. I've only been in one relationship with a woman, in my early twenties. It ended extremely badly. Possibly too bad to even mention, and I do not want to use her as an excuse to why I'm like this.  I feel I was like this even before our relationship. I felt that if I brought a girl back home, I'd be made fun of, picked on by my siblings, there was a large embarrassment factor to everything. \nSince my relationship I've not treated women in the best way, to put it bluntly a slurry of one night stands and cases of me not explicitly stating my views on the whole concept of a relationship, which is that I never wish to have one, which is how I've felt from my early teens. I think there might be something wrong with me but I am not sure what. But as soon as I feel I'm getting too close to someone I push them away. I just can't help it. \nAround 8 months ago I met a woman who I really liked, I have never really clicked with someone like this before.. I've even felt at times that I loved her. I haven't had these feelings since my last relationship all that time ago and I've been struggling to deal with them. the 8 months was incredible and I felt closer and closer too her. I think about her alot. But we got very close, and my feelings suddenly went because I felt it had gone too far. I broke up with her and hurt her badly. I've been feeling extremely low about it and have met up with her on several occasions. I find myself not sleeping because of it, because I still want to see her and be around her, I don't want her out of my life. I think I might have ruined a good thing...I might have made the wrong decision and don't know what to say, do or think... \n.", "summary": "broke up with first relationship in years because of fear, missing her and feel I've hurt her and made a mistake.."}
{"id": "t3_2ezvj3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15 M] would like some help with my crush [15 M]", "post": "Basically, I think I have a crush on another guy who lives on the other side of the world from me but I don't know if there is a chance or if the time is right.\n\nAround 2 months ago, we started talking about a certain show we both liked after I made a thread about it on reddit and we talked for a lot on kik/snapchat. I found out he was gay (so I had that going for me) but I never told him I was (I've never told anyone I am gay). \n\nI know he considers me as a friend but not very close since we've only been friends for less than 2 months.\n\nSoon after that, he used to start conversations/message me or reply to snapchats I put on my story that I didn't send to him and I would politely respond and engage in conversation. He also said that he used to like a guy on here but now only as a friend. This made me wonder if he might have liked me.\n\nFast forward to a couple weeks ago. He's started the school year and said he won't be as available since he's at school and obviously busy making new friends and getting used to stuff. \n\nThe last time I talked to him was for the latest episode of the show which was on Monday and the conversation was fine/polite/casual. \n\nI suspect that he might have liked me but moved on and now it might be too late to do anything - if he did actually like me. I don't know how to tell him, when to tell him or try to engage conversation without it looking forced or obvious I like him. \n\nI don't know how to approach this, help or advice is appreciated, thank you.", "summary": "Have a crush on a gay guy who lives on the other side of the world from me. We haven't been talking a lot recently and I don't know how or when to tell him if I do decide to confess."}
{"id": "t3_1t5hob", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] trying to figure out how (and what activity) I should ask my [22 f] friend out on a date.", "post": "Me [21 M] with my [ 22/F] friend whom I'd like to ask out. We've gotten along together really well in class, and when we eat lunch after class together. The thing is I literally can't think of a single think to ask her to do. Like, I don't do anything ever. At least not for the past year since the army rejected me. \n\nWe're both currently college students and finals are about to end, and I don't have a car.\n\nWhat should I ask her out to do? I really don't want to ask her to a movie since we probably wont interact all that much if I do that. I also have like three  number of girls I'd like to hang out with (that I met at the library at 2AM studying) but don't know how to. I would also like to avoid drinking, as I just don't like to drink all that much, but am open to it. \nThanks!", "summary": "Been so bored this past year I've forgotten how to have fun, or what to invite people to to have fun, cause I suck and have no friends :("}
{"id": "t3_1j8v0j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26m] boyfriend of over a year won't get to know my [20f] family.", "post": "I am constantly begging for him to do anything with my family and he never will. Today was my nieces birthday and I made sure to leave late so he only had to be there for ten minutes but he couldn't even do that. He left early for work to avoid it. He has anxiety but so do I and I still try to get to know his family. My family is so important to me and I feel like I'm becoming a stranger to them. I got home and found he made this status: \"I guess I am a shitty boyfriend since I went in to work a bit early so I can get extra shit done so I dont have to stay late instead of sitting at a birthday party where no one will talk to me.\"\n\nMy response: \"wow way to completely twist that around. I'm really upset because you never go to family functions with me when I want you to and you left early so you didn't have to go with me. Pretty much no one in my family really knows you and that's shitty.\"\n\nHe refuses to delete it. We've been arguing about it for a while and I just don't know what to do. Is this even salvagable? We just bought and apartment and I feel like I'm going to have to move back out already because we have this argument every month.", "summary": "He won't get to know the people I love, he made a facebook status, and I don't know if we should break up."}
{"id": "t3_jf17l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "REDDIT! please help me! Local gun store sold me a stolen gun. wtf now?", "post": "I bought a glock as my first gun in july 2011 from a shop in LAS VEGAS, nevada. a month later i realized im not responsible enough to have a gun around the house. I sell it to a friend under the condition that he pay me at the end of the summer. He stops talking to me for 3 weeks and i finally get a hold of him. From what he tells me he was pulled over by highway patrol, they ran the serial number from the glock, it came up stolen. He was in jail for 3 days. filled out a bunch of paper work about how he got the gun. There is now a local and ATF investigation.\n\nI dont know what the fuck to do. The gun store screwed us over. He talked to someone at the police station and they mentioned that theres nothing the local gun store is liable for. I think thats totally bs, considering they sold hot merchandise.\n\nsomeone help me.", "summary": "fuck face local gun store sold a hot gun. Friend was detained for 3 days. Cops say there's nothing we can do. out of $700 bucks from gun"}
{"id": "t3_w9ev6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[19/m] Unsure what to do. Girl I'm very interested in doesn't want to commit (19/f).", "post": "So, I'm very interested in a girl that I have some strong feelings for. But the problem is, she does not want to be in a committed relationship. This girl and I go way back. We've been on a few dates recently and had a lot of fun. She had even told me that there was a good chance we could be in a committed relationship. Since then, she has proceeded to also go on dates with numerous other people, including some of my good friends whom I reintroduced her to. \n\nBeing tired of dealing with the jealousy, I asked her if there was any chance of us having a relationship. She said yes, but that it was so miniscule that it was irrelevant. I then asked if she was interested in one in the near future to which she replied: no. I'm not the kind of person that wants to play games, so I told her that I was done emotionally, and that we had to stop going on dates and texting. She still wants to hang out and be friends which I think is a good idea, but it's going to be tough. \n\nYou see Reddit, I am a really really nice guy. I'm not a douchebag. If I'm going to do something, I'm going to do it right. If I'm going to pursue a girl, I'm going to try to have a committed relationship with her after we go on a few dates, are really close, and have a lot of fun. \n\nSo my question is this: Should I just abandon this altogether? It kind of seems weird to me that as the guy I am the one wanting commitment, while she just wants to be emotionally involved with everybody. Is there anything I can do that will make her want to commit? She's told me before that I'm the nicest and sweetest guy she's met, but at this age I also believe that to be a curse. Girls my age don't want to be with nice guys. She has told me that there is a very small window in life where you can enjoy being single, and that she doesn't want to lose that.", "summary": "girl I really like doesn't want to commit to me. How can I change this situation, or should I just get out now."}
{"id": "t3_4c9xg7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/F] with my girlfriend [24/F] of a few months, working in the same place and it's weird.", "post": "I'll be quick. She referred me for a great job at the company she's working at. Much better than my previous job. I got the job. I was pretty excited about working here. We didn't think it'd be an issue because we are in different departments and thought we would keep it professional anyway. But it'd be nice to chat sometimes in between work.\n\nOh my god, it's my first day and it's...weird. I haven't got anything to do except paperwork so maybe that's why, but I can't stop thinking about her. I consider myself fairly strong willed and not too reliant emotionally, and good at compartmentalising. But this is really weird. I'm sort of regretting doing it at all. we had an awkward conversation during a break but that's it. I'm worried this will ruin our relationship. Should I wait it out? I can't leave now, that's for sure. I also feel really guilty about impacting her in some way.", "summary": "what should I do, I feel awkward about working in the same place as my girlfriend, but it's only the first day."}
{"id": "t3_4xu5v3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] is having trouble deciding to break up or not with my gf [27 f]", "post": "Posted about this earlier, but down to crunch time, so any final advice would be appreciated.\n\nGF is returning from a trip today. She has been gone for two weeks. I have been using this time to see how I feel about her while she was gone. We have been dating for six months.\n\nWhile I have enjoyed our time, I don't have the same feelings of love she has. She sees a long term future for us, and I unfortunately don't think I feel the same way. Therefore, while I am still on the fence, I am leaning towards breaking up with her.\n\nA few things that are making me hesitiatnt\n\n1) We were planning on celebrating our six month anniversary this weekend. She also just told me, she considers our anniversary to be today.\n\n2) She also recently told me that last time she was with a guy, they broke up when she returned from a trip. \n\n3) She has anxiety.\n\nAll of these factors coming in to play, I'm not sure if breaking up with her now is selfish of me, or is the bad timing just how it goes sometimes?", "summary": "Thinking of breaking up on our six month anniversary, but don't want to be the rom-com villain of her nightmares"}
{"id": "t3_3hc5o6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "tell me what I need to hear - my friend [37F] and I [32M] tried dating, it didn't work. We are still friends but I'm struggling with the fact that she's started seeing someone else", "post": "I met her while she was in a bad spot after a breakup. We became friends (she doesn't have many in this small town). Despite there being a lot of red flags I developed feelings for her. After a few months we tried dating. I was really into her and it was a roller coaster of emotions for me. She gave it a try because on paper I'm great for her, but it just didn't feel right, so we broke it off. It was her call but after the rose coloured glasses had come off a few days later I was happy it had gone that way. We are almost neighbours so we talked and decided to stay friends. Hung out, went fishing, talked about our new online dating experiments etc. \n\n6 weeks later, we met up and she was excited to tell me that she started seeing someone. Told me all about it. I was happy for her, but then a few hours later it hit me. I can't stop thinking about her and this new guy. Didn't sleep last night, I really thought I was done losing sleep over this one. It's stupid, I don't want her back, I'm just jealous that she managed to move on quickly and I didn't (small town, pretty woman, lot of single males..). \n\nI think I need to call her up and tell her no hard feelings but we have to stop talking because it's messing with my head.  But I can't quite get myself to do it. Damnit.", "summary": "thought we could stay friends, but now she's seeing someone new and to my surprise it's messing with my head. Tell me that I need to cut contact already, /r/relationships"}
{"id": "t3_y1l5y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How would you react if your boyfriend has a \"cozy\" picture with some random girl?", "post": "Here's the story. I'm a 22 year old girl with a 23 year old guy. I've been dating this guy for over a year. He's on vacation right now and I haven't seen him for a week. I decided to play with myself while looking at his pictures but then I went to his profile and saw new tagged pics with him being cozy with another girl. The pictures were taken like 3 weeks ago. They were pictures of him having his arm around the girl and like just him having his head lean against the girl's head. They seemed like a typical couple's pictures you know? Like, he's promised me it's nothing but just seeing him be with another girl, and it was more than one picture, made me feel so jealous. Like you would think he was dating her if you went to his FB profile and just went through his pictures. I've asked a few of my friends and they all said the same thing: it seemed sketchy and definitely seemed like he was seeing this girl rather than me. so reddit, my question is, how would you go about with this? Would you let it slide or would you ask him to take the pictures down?", "summary": "boyfriend of one year has pictures with a girl making it look like she's his girlfriend, would you ask him to take it down or leave it be?"}
{"id": "t3_369jms", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by thinking a girl was a guy", "post": "Earlier today, I was going through tinder trying to find someone hot for sexy video call or something, I ended up downloading roughly 15 different apps that mentioned I could get easy girls. So anyway, I put my snapchat name in the bio of all of these apps. Not a good idea, in fact, a very, very bad one. \nI got a lot of interesting contenders who actually added me, one of them being one of the most flat chested girls I will ever meet. She asked me to rate her body, so she sent me a picture of her upper half, to my confusion, it looked like a guy. I wasn't 100% sure if it was a guy, so I asked for another pic and she replied \"are you straight\"? Wtf ok? So then i think it's a guy and he is just yanking my chain, so he asked if I was straight because I asked to see another picture of his body...\n\nHe/she then says its my turn to send a pic (fair enough) \n\nSo, if I send a picture to he/she it's going to be gayer than having buttsex with the president of Cuba, if it actually turns out to be a guy. So should I take the gamble to it either being a girl or guy?\n\nI didn't, I pussied out. I ended up saying, \" sorry, I'm not gay\"... Whoops, turned out it was a girl.\nSo I now feel terrible for making an innocent grill feel insecure about her body... She blocked me so I can't say sorry.\n\nIt's not really a big TIFU like most other's, but I feel really bad about it.", "summary": "Flat chested girl asked me for an opinion of her body, the picture looked like a boy so I told her I wasn't gay. She blocked me so I can't apologise."}
{"id": "t3_1gqvoc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[23/F] with my bf [50/M] have been dating for 9 months and I don't know if he takes our relationship as seriously as I am, due to our age difference.", "post": "So we met at Starbucks, and he asked me to be his girlfriend 2 weeks later. Now we've been dating for 9 months. Every time I'm with him, I have so much fun.\n\n I've only had 3 ex in the past, and I've never been so attracted to someone like this before. Honestly, he even gave me my first orgasm! He's smart, mature, and very attractive. I notice all the little things about him and I'm in love. The only problem is, I haven't told him yet due to many reasons. \n\n* his age. I can't tell what's going on his head. \n* He's been around the block with the dating scene. He was married for 20 years before going through a hard breakup with his ex wife. That happened 5 years ago. Then he's been in a few serious relationships and \"multiple\" online dates. So obviously he's experienced. I've only had 3 ex and had sex with 2 of them. \n* if I tell him I love him, I'm scared he won't feel the same way and our relationship", "summary": "bf is older than I am, don't know if I should confess myself to him because I don't know what to expect. "}
{"id": "t3_2uhmcr", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "How do I get over having romantic feelings for my best friend? (Not mutual)", "post": "He [24] sends mixed signals with the things he says sometimes, causing me [19] to overanalyze and/or get carried away with it. He likes me but isn't on board with my physical appearance which I'm working on. And I completely understand that. We have phone sex but I told him I no longer want to as it doesn't help with my trying to get over him. I'm extremely attached and its rare I feel like this about someone. I can't help but invest a lot of me emotionally when I feel this way but its only making me feel ridiculous considering its mostly one sided. KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO ME,PLEASE.", "summary": "I'm emotionally invested into a one sided romantic attraction to my best friend who does not feel the same way. Knock some sense into me."}
{"id": "t3_i8cxg", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "My dog thinks I should be up at the crack of dawn", "post": "I am a recurring problem-haver, it seems. My dog (whose previous issue was ankle-biting) is a 2 or 3 year old lab/basset hound cross. She was adopted from a shelter and has some separation anxiety issues (which we are dealing with), and is generally very very needy.\n\nThe trouble I am coming across in recent weeks is this: She sleeps in the bedroom, as she will NEVER be in a different room from me by choice, in her crate beside the bed. (Not closed in; that is just where she likes to sleep.) As soon as it is even sort of light outside, she begins pacing around the bed and whining incessantly.\n\nAt first I stuck with ignoring her and waiting for her to settle down and then giving her some attention (I didn't have any treats on hand, though maybe keeping some on the nightstand is not a bad plan). The trouble with that method is that she never actually settles down. She just gets increasingly louder until it reaches the point where she is flat out barking and howling.\n\nI am concerned about this because when I do finally get up (as I have no choice but to do), I am probably indicating to her that whining and barking is the way to get someone out of bed. I know it is not a case of having to go outside, as she calms down immediately when someone gets up.\n\nI am at a loss about the cause of this and how to fix it. Any insight would be much appreciated!", "summary": "Dog whines like crazy at dawn and just gets louder when I ignore her. I have to get up, but I think this encourages her to whine. Suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_2y0a77", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "She [22/f] confused me so much, I [20/m] need help understanding what to do", "post": "Hey all, I've just been having a hard time reading this girl I've been talking to. I'll give a quick summary of what the situation is.\n\nAbout three months ago the store I worked at caught fire and I was transferred to work at another location. While there I met a few girls, the one I'm talking to being one of them. She gave me her number to warn about one of the other girls and that she'll text me. So we started texting everyday and hung out once and we're going on a date Saturday. Sounds straightforward right?\n\nWell tonight as I was texting her I complimented her and she told me that she wasn't used to people being nice to her and told me that we're just friends. I decided to not beat around the bush and tell her that I like her, to which she responded with the ever so common, \"I don't feel the same way.\"\n\nI decided to follow up on it and asked why not. She told me she wasn't looking for a relationship right now. So with my spirits dampened, I decided to stop texting at that moment when she suddenly texted asking if we'll still go out Saturday and keep texting every day. I said only if she wanted to, and I got a yeah with a smiley. \n\nThen I asked if it'll bother her that I like her when we're hanging out and she said, \" No because we'll be getting to know each other.\" She even confirmed it as a date that we're going out Saturday.\n\nSo does she want to like me, already does or won't at all? I could be looking it at the wrong way but I'd appreciate all advice and suggestions.", "summary": "Girl isn't looking for anything and claims she doesn't feel the same way but wants to keep texting and go on a date Saturday so we can get to know each other more. Pursue or no?"}
{"id": "t3_1kwsuw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me[24M] with my GF [20F], been dating for 3 weeks. She casually mentioned her old FWB is really good at sex. I'm insecure/jealous.", "post": "A girl and I have recently started dating. Long story short, she was talking about her past sexual experiences and said that her old FWB (male) (also her best friend currently) is very good at sex.\n\nI told her that makes me a bit jealous, and she promptly said that I'm good at fingering, etc. and that I'm a very affectionate, etc. To me, they are just compliments to shut me up even though I'm sure she was being sincere.\n\nI don't think I'm jealous because of the fact that a guy has had sex with her or whatever, because that's all in the past. I think I'm just insecure knowing that I'm possibly not her best sex partner, which is the dumbest thing ever but I can't help it.\n\nShould I just get over it? Or is there something I should do?\n\nI am going to try to not think about it too much. However, there is a very good chance I will meet her best friend. I feel like I would feel really insecure/self-conscious in front of him. What can I do to help ease that feeling?", "summary": "GF says her old FWB is good at sex; I feel insecure. Possibly meeting her old FWB soon; I feel even more insecure. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3j0t25", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "So my [18m] girlfriend [18f] of almost a year thinks she may be pregnant and I am away in college. I need to figure out a way to comfort her and help her.", "post": "So basically I left for school 3 weeks ago and school is 8 hours away from home (she's still a senior in high school). Her and I are extremely close which is the reason we are still together. We figured we would break up if it ever got unbearable but it's been fine so far. Anyway apparently she's late on her period. Neither of us want to jump to conclusions but if she is pregnant I have no idea what to do since I am not there with her. Her parents would kill her if she told them and so we are trying our best to hide it from them. But we still have no idea what we would do. So basically we were wondering what our options are and how I can comfort her from down here.", "summary": "girlfriend might be pregnant and I'm too far away to be with her. How do we make the abortion process as easy as possible on her and keep it discreet?"}
{"id": "t3_1u8os8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] feel like our relationship has rub its course. She [22 F] sees nothing wrong with it.", "post": "Back story: We are a LDR relationship of sorts. At times we are separated by distance (different colleges) and other times by an overprotective parent (she was raised by her grandparents actually). We probably see each other only a few times a month at best, even when she is only minutes away.  This is both of our first relationship. \n\nWe've always had issues with sexual matters. She would like to wait to be married to have sex. When we are together, we do mutual masturbation. Which I was okay with for a while but she is not always the most considerate partner. Most of the time she shows no interest in making me satisfied. \n\nI have tried talking to her but it seems I can only ever manage to get a few inches and it always seems to make her more bitter about it. The most recent talk was right before her grand father died a few months ago. I've tried to be as patient and caring as possible but I think resentment has been keeping me from being so as much as I could be. \n\nRight now would be a horrible time for me to break up with her. A lot of her family life is in turmoil and she is coming into her last semester of school and I am her sole emotional support. But waiting, I think would be worse.  It makes me feel trapped which only increases the resentment. And she doesn't deserve that. \n\nIdeally, I could remain her friend and support her but I am not idealistic enough to think that will happen. Which is sad. She is my best friend, even though I think the resentment has poisoned that some too \n\nOn that note, if we broke up, I would likely lose a good deal of my friends but I would not begrudge them for that. They have been to her friends for a lot longer than they have been mine.\n\nFuck. I an bad at this. I have been thinking about this too long and I have lost sight of what is relevant or not too the matter so apologies if this seems scattered.", "summary": "Distance and a lack of intimacy have been ruining my four year relationship and I am afraid breaking up would hurt her when she is at her most vulnerable."}
{"id": "t3_1btnt1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M20] here, wondering how to (or if I should) re-ask a girl (20)out after she said she wasn't looking for a relationship a while ago.", "post": "This has a little backstory to it so bear with me.\n\nWe met last Halloween, and that night she added me on Facebook and said we should hang out.  I agreed, but was crushing on another girl at the time, and waited until that fell apart a few months later to ask her out.\n\nWe met for dinner on our school's campus just to get to know one another and it went pretty well, so I asked her to go to dinner and a movie with me (I know super-imaginative, right?)  She accepted and that date went ok, but I was pretty nervous and I think she picked up on it and it affected her.  \n\nThe next day, she texted me and said she had just gotten out of a relationship and wanted a break, and that we should just be friends.  I said that was fine, believing full-well that she just meant she didn't want a relationship with **ME**, and that we shouldn't stay in touch.  \n\nBut we have stayed in touch, and now that I've already been rejected, I am much less nervous and we have a lot of fun together.  We've been out in groups and alone, and its been a lot of fun.  \n\nThe problem is, now I'm crushing hard on her, and she seems to like me back.  Its only been a couple months since our first \"date\" and she said no then.  I can't tell if she just likes me as a friend, but I'm pretty sure she likes me as much as I do her.  \n\nSince its only been a few weeks, is it acceptable to ask her how she feels now?  I don't wanna mess this up as a friendship, but I figure if we both like each other then why not?\n\nI know this sounds a lot like a \"friend-zone\" situation, but I've already asked her out, and I think now that I'm less nervous she has gotten to know the real me, and likes me more than she originally did.", "summary": "I asked a girl out, and got rejected because I was nervous after the first date.  We've stayed in touch and now I think she likes me more. Can/Should/How do I ask her out again so soon?"}
{"id": "t3_2zvn4k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16 y/o male] am going on my first date tomorrow, need help!", "post": "Be sure to explain in detail with line breaks.\nThis is my first post ever on reddit, sorry if my grammar/format is off im a foreigner ;). Okay so about two weeks ago I was feeling kinda horny, and I felt like downloading hot or not and checking out some girls. I had to log in through facebook, and saw a friend of mine so I clicked on his profile and there was a web of mutual friends. So my friend, had a friend, who had a friend, who was a friends with this real cute girl (sorry, its confusing) and for some reason I scrolled down to her profile and saw her kik. I add her on Kik late at night, she adds me when she wakes up before school. We instantly hit it off and text each other during school the whole day and well into the morning (1am). We then talked the rest of the weekend and this whole week. We decided to meet up soon for a movie and some food. A couple hours later she tells me her friend had a mental breakdown, (this was like 3 hours ago), and confessed she almost killed herself last week. I conforted my lady friend who was in hysterics, and she asked if she could bring her friend along to cheer her up. So here we are having our first date together, alongside her depressed friend. Do you guys have any tips, because as far as im informed, first date arent usually under these conditions. Thanks!", "summary": "Going on my first real date with a girl I met online, we're both in highschool, and her depressed friend is tagging along so she can cheer up a bit, any tips on how to handle this?"}
{"id": "t3_nu9kq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Going to a party knowing barely anyone + possible relationship", "post": "Hey guys,\n\nI know a girl since elementary (we are both 18 now) and even though we went to different schools we kept in contact through messengers for the last 6 years. Neither of us expected any kind of relationship and therefore we could basically chat about anything (even about own relationships with other people). \n\nLike 2 months ago I split up with a girl and we started chatting even more frequently. 2 weeks ago she invited me to go ice skating which made me pretty sure that both of us want to get closer as it was a really cool evening and she kept smiling at staring at me (she brought a friend with her). like last week she asked me whether I had any plans for New Years Eve. \n\nI actually had plans with a few friends (I have very little friends after a incident I wont explain now because I could basically write a book about the last 3 years of my life) but I really want to go out with her. So I was invited to a party with people from her school. I dont know anyone except her and she asked me to bring a friend with me in case she is busy with someone else which I think is a perfectly fine reason. \n\nOf course I dont know anyone I could bring with me and as I am a little shy I find it difficult to start talking to people (both male and female).\n\nAlcohol is allowed of course.\n\nSo first question: Can you give me any advice on how to get started talking to people I dont know at all? Of course I could ask how this person got to know my friend or get involved in another conversation, but I doubt it will always work out. At least there is alcohol :P\n\nSecond: How do I behave concerning her? I think I can be pretty sure that she wants to have a relationship with me because of our past and her body language 2 weeks ago on the ice, but Im not sure how to behave in a group of people as I have never been in this situation.\n\nThanks for the answers :D", "summary": "Going to a party with possible GF, dont know anyone there, how to get in contact and get closer with possible GF."}
{"id": "t3_2bugzx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 M] need to ask my crush [25 F] about her ring size discreetly. Need dialog advice.", "post": "I have been friends with this girl for a couple of years already. Just a friend for her, not really for me, not that she knows. I doubt i have any chance, as i know that i am not her type, but i am starting to drown in personal hell and i am planning to proceed with confession. For which i want to give her a gift of a ring, no matter what her answer will be. I chose a very special ring, whose design will have a symbolic meaning, but there is a problem - it can't be resized later on. I need to know the size before ordering. As just a friend i don't have access to her own rings, i can't measure her hand in any way, nor do we have shared female friends whom i could confine with the problem. The only way to do so - is to ask. And so i need advice - how can i ask her about her ring size, without provoking the thought? Or at least do it humorous way, so that she thinks that it's a joke of some sort. Any advice is appreciated.", "summary": "Want to confess to a friend with the ring. No way to know ring size without asking. Dialog advice needed."}
{"id": "t3_1fs01w", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "ideas for gift to cheer a stranger up", "post": "I work at a call center at had a older lady call in who was very distraught. She had called in multiple times that night and no one was willing to listen to her. I talked to her and found out she had just got medical news that she did not have much longer to live. She was very scared and said she didn't have anyone to talk to and felt very alone. It broke my heart and by the end of the call I was in tears myself. I know I broke the companies rules but I wrote down her address because I wanted to send her something anonymously to maybe cheer her up a little. I wouldn't know what to write in a card since I can't say who I am. I don't have a ton of money to spend but want to send her something. Wondering if anyone has any ideas of what I can send her? I can be a one time thing or some little things to send every once in a while.", "summary": "What should I send a stranger anonymously who is lonely and found out she is dying to help cheer her up a litte?"}
{"id": "t3_1o33pw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Me [21/m] wanting advice towards ex/friend [20/f]", "post": "Hello everyone,\nI dated an awesome girl for 16 months. We broke up over a horrible miscommunication and pride from both sides being unwillingly to compromise. Then after having a month and half apart we started dating again. We were together for two weeks before we broke up due to a huge fight over what happene while we weren't together. It's been about two months now and we've just started talking again. I still have strong feelings for this girl and she has feelings for me too (I do not think they are as strong as mine). \n\nThis is where my delima comes in. I have been told countless times that her and I spent too much time together, especially since we're so young. I know that is most likely true, but we just loved being in each others company. My family, especially my parents think that I only want her back because I haven't met someone new. I have been encouraged to start dating again and find someone knew with more similar interests. I wouldn't mind dating again, but I just can't get my feelings for my ex to go away, nor do I really want them too. I still have strong feelings for her and I would love to be with her again, but I know it wouldn't be the same. Her family and my family would probably give us both a lot of stress and crap about it too. But in all honesty, I wouldn't care because she makes me happy.\n\nWhat I want to know is what you all think I should do. I do not want to lose her as a friend, so do you think I should just back off, date other girls, and only be available to her platonically? Or do you believe that I should act upon my feelings and show romantic interest in her again? \n\nI know that whatever I do I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings anymore. Am I being selfish for wanting to be with her again for a third time, even though we broke up? Do you think that I am being a loser and I should just meet new people? \n\nThanks for your time, I just don't have anyone else in my life to turn too for this advice. \nP.S. I might meet her tonight for warm drinks and conversation.", "summary": "16 months together with a girl. We break up and get back together. We break up again. We still have feelings for eachother. Right now we're just being friends. Keep being friends or try again and do better?"}
{"id": "t3_fqmr1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Has anyone else had a \"ahh shit, that was racist of me!\" moment?", "post": "I was getting on the subway train on my way to work when I accidentally bumped into someone. I took a glimpse at him and said \"my bad\". He politely shrugged it off.\n\nAs I wait for my stop, I analyze what just happened and that leads me to thinking about my apology's word choice. I then realize that I would never say \"my bad\" if it was some white guy in a shirt and tie. Because the guy was black (btw: I'm hispanic), I chose to say \"my bad\".\n\nA quick search through my memory bank resulted in another example: a quick \"yo what up\" vs. with-a-smile \"hey good morning\".\n\n**So Reddit, does that make me racist-lite?** I'm judging someone by the skin of their color. Although I think I'd of used the same word choice if it was a white guy dressed \"urban\". *Shrug*\n\n**Related**: *I use to have a hard definition of racism: \"if you change the way you treat someone based on their skin color, it's racist\". However, I now think that's too broad. Based on that definition, affirmative action is racism---not that I agree or disagree with affirmative action. **How do you define racism?", "summary": "At times, my word choice is based on skin-color. Does that make me a racist? Do you exhibit similar behavior?"}
{"id": "t3_559g2r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19 F] crush [19 M] of over a year often repeats the same stories/opinions/jokes to me - bad sign?", "post": "I've had a crush on this guy for a long time, but we're kind of in the same circle of friends and I've found it hard to push it beyond hanging out as just buddies. Whenever we're all out together we both end up gravitating towards each other and walking side by side or spending most of the evening just talking together. I've noticed others in the group have noticed this and given some 'looks' to each other.\n\nFor whatever reason neither of us have made a move, and I'm beginning to doubt he's interested as much as I am based on one thing; he often repeats himself to me, as if he's forgotten the previous time(s) that he's said these things.\n\nIt sounds stupid but I keep a diary and end up writing down of a lot of the things we talk about as I enjoy spending time with him and don't want to forget some of the cute little things we end up joking about, even if it turns into nothing. So I think I'd find it very hard to repeat stories or opinions about things to him without realising, as I have really vivid memories of what was said. An example of him doing this is when we walked past a movie poster and he told me about how a friend of his got confused about the plot as he'd mixed it up with another movie. It was a funny story and we talked about it for a while. The next week we were hanging out and same movie was mentioned again, and he starts telling me this story again like I've never heard it. This kind of thing has happened even up to four times!\n\nHe doesn't smoke pot (I don't think). Is this a sign of him not being as into me as I am him?", "summary": "Crush forgets that he's told me things and repeats himself a lot, leading me to think he's not as invested in me as I am him."}
{"id": "t3_wad7r", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What are the creepiest scene(s) for a movie that still give you the goosebumps today? EDIT: I'm 21 and still get a little creeped out by these.", "post": "My two are from movies called \"The Lady in White\", and \"It\" by Steven King.  My parents are very lenient and allowed my sister and I to watch some creepy/scary movies when were were kids.  I'll tell you guys about my two creepiest parts.\n\n1) \"The Lady in White\"- So, for those who have seen this movie, there's a scene in which the young boy is \"watching\" this little girl's murder but he cannot be seen by anyone and neither can the killer.  The part of the scene that always gets me is the part where the little girl in a albino white dress is literally a couple of feet off of the ground screaming bloody murder, being strangeld by an invisible assailant in a cloak room.  This shit still scares the crap out of me and I will forever not go into a \"cloak room\"/closet in a school simply because of that movie. *Also, there is a creepy as balls whistle song that goes on throughout the movie, still can't forget it and it's been over 10 years.\n\n2)  The part in Steven King's \"IT\" where Pennywise shows up in the in the sewer to get Georgie and says \"Hey Georgie, we all float down here!\"  No matter how much time goes by I'll always remember that statement and how freaked out I was when I saw it.  To make people more familiar, I despise closed and disgusting spaces (sewer) and the whole evil clown thing makes me uncomfortable.  *Also, the part where Georgie's photo starts to bleed in the book when his brother is looking at it. What the actual fuck?", "summary": "1) Lady in White murder, choke seen and whistle and 2) Pennywise in sewer and Georgie's bloody photo"}
{"id": "t3_3e84om", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18 M] mom [44 F] is definitely cheating on my dad [49 M] with her coworker. How do I handle the situation?", "post": "Hey r/relationships,\n\nI never thought I would be in a situation like this, but my mom is cheating on my dad and its become more and more evident to me now. Initially it was just doubts, but I'm quite certain now. I don't have any solid proof other than observations, which are pretty strong themselves. The person she's seeing isn't currently working with her. He was her colleague in her previous place of work.\n\nWhen it started off, I found out when she would use her phone more often than she ever has. I didn't think much of it but it started increasing my curiosity. Then, I started noticing her deleting chats with that particular person every time she sent him something or received something from. She hasn't realized that I know that she's been doing this, so she's quite unsuspecting of the whole thing.\n\nRecently however, she's been more involved with him. She wakes up early in the morning and the first thing she does is check her phone for messages from him. She calls and secretly talks with him in the room. And now, she's been coming home quite late too. \n\nMy dad is oblivious to the whole thing. He just assumes she's talking to her friends or what not. But you don't delete every message you get from your friend. I don't know what else she's been up to, and I sincerely hope things aren't going really fast. I have no clue how to proceed. In a few weeks, I'll be off to college. They're shelling out a lot of money to send me to college abroad, so I don't want to screw things up, because I *really* appreciate what they're doing for me, and also because I don't want any of this messing around with my college education. \n\nWat do reddit?", "summary": "mom is cheating on dad. dad is clueless. I'm going to college and don't want things going complete AWOL for me or for the family"}
{"id": "t3_3lh4at", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (24 F)ex[26 M] and I dated about 2.5 years and broke up a month ago. He allegedly says terrible things about me.", "post": "I got out of a long relationship about a month ago. I knew it was coming and was ready to end it myself, but he initiated the breakup. We haven't really been in contact since then.\n\nThe relationship was complex and stressful with many ups and downs. I loved my ex very much and knew that he had some issues as far as his mental health. He talked about feeling poorly-mentally or physically-often.\n\nI've recently been told by a mutual contact that he tells people that I 'gave him depression' and that he is 'so happy' to be without me. I wasn't the perfect girlfriend but I know I did everything I could to support and help him, often at my own emotional expense. I can't believe he would say that about me after all we've been through. Additionally, he told me he had depression issues when we first got together so I don't get how I could have caused it.\n\nCan you guys help me to refocus and not care so much? This hurts. Thanks.", "summary": "Ex of 2 years is saying that I am the reason he was depressed, even though he was like that when we got together and I really tried to help him. Just want to find ways to feel less angry and hurt. Thanks."}
{"id": "t3_hjd5p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what do I do about my internet predicament?", "post": "I'm in a very unique predicament for the summer, Reddit, and I need your worldly advice. You see, I'm living far away from home this summer and rented out some temporary living space for just a three month stint. In my haste, I overlooked the CRUCIAL detail that this building is not equipped with wireless internet. Even as I submit this I'm sitting in a Barnes and Noble. I don't necessarily mind going to different wifi spots in order to get internet but considering the closest place is three miles away it makes it a little less desirable. I can see the tenants around me have routers but they're ALL password protected and they're all 80+ years old and literally never show their faces around the building. So basically I'm looking for a cheap way to get internet for a couple months.", "summary": "I don't have internet and I'm looking for either a way to find out a router password without asking the person or a cheap way to get internet for a short period of time."}
{"id": "t3_48cm3l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (17f) self esteem hasn't been great after my bf (18m) cheated on me how do I stay positive?", "post": "I guess I should say that I'm not constantly sad or anything even now I know my life is actually great compared to a lot of people's I just need a better mindset, so I'm not getting sad as much.\n\nMy bf of two years has cheated on me twice now with his ex that used to constantly harass me, threaten me, and even now ruin my self esteem to the point it's kind of in a pit just by being near me. I don't know why I let her effect me so much shes not cuter than me and I'm definitely better person to her, but no matter what whenever she's near I have this feeling of dread, and panic and constantly compare myself to her. \n\nWhy haven't I broken up with him? Honestly sometimes I'm not sure he really is sweet, he helps me keep from feeling alone, and I really do love him! But he doesn't text me at all when he's with his friends, which means all the time, he never wants to do anything with me aside from staying home and sleeping (I love cuddles but when he constantly talks about his adventures with his friends and then never wants to take one with me because \"there is nothing to do\" it makes me feel like I'm only there for when he's too tired to hang out with friends) and he's constantly hiding stuff from me. I know it's crap and I've tried to before, but I just get a strong feeling of dread and I just can't do it.\n\nI know my friends love me and I hang out with someone maybe once, twice a week but it's never in a group and I'm always jealous of people that can have groups of people together like that and hanging out and stuff. \n\nI guess I just want to find stuff that will improve my self esteem, and maybe help me figure out what to do with my bf.", "summary": "Self esteem has dropped to an all new low after bf cheated, but at the same time I don't want to leave him."}
{"id": "t3_v5d3q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Promise ring help", "post": "Me: 22f. Bf: 22m. \nAcquaintances for 4 years, Friends for 3, Dating for 1. (8 years total)\n\nA very happy, healthy relationship and I feel confident about our future together. \n\nA few days before our first anniversary, he asked my ring size and I internally freaked out and changed the subject after answering it. The next day, I brought it up and made sure he knew I wasn't ready for an engagement ring and he assured me he wasn't getting me one. \n\nI never thought he'd have gotten me a promise ring, as I'm not terribly traditional and he knows I think cutesy stuff is tacky. I was very surprised when he gave it to me, promising to always be there for me. I really don't like the idea of being \"pre-engaged\" because a typical promise ring stands for a promise to one day make a promise to get married...\n\nI thought it was really cute - painfully so. But it also looked like a men's wedding band and I ended up giving it back. He could tell by my reaction the day before that I wasn't excited about it. He was embarrassed. We talked about it over the next week; I told him that if he gave me an engagement ring, I'd say \"yes\" (although we both agree that's not going to happen for a while).\n\nI'm stuck between my dislike of the tackiness and the desire to have that physical symbol of our relationship on my hand. Would it be silly of me to ask for it back? Or to ask for one that's more feminine? I feel like the former would be flip-floppy and the latter would be picky and controlling. What do?", "summary": "Boyfriend gave me a promise ring for our one-year, I gave it back, can't decide if I really want it or not or I'm too picky or what."}
{"id": "t3_2278b1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Would my ex (26M) wonder why I'm (24F) re-friending him after a year NC?", "post": "We dated a long-ass time ago for not very long, and then didn't talk until I started grad school. I reached out via facebook, we had a few phone calls then and meetups, all with our respective SO's permission, and chatted pretty regularly over facebook and text. I think either our semi-friendship just started to fade like most long-distance friendships (especially ones between exes! lol) or his gf became upset. I'll admit, I tried to force it into a \"real\" friendship like I have with my grad school friends and suggested we should grab a beer sometime. Getting coffee with him was one thing, grabbing drinks together at a bar would be totally inappropriate. The contact dwindled almost immediately after that. \n\nI was having an awful semester besides (my mom was diagnosed with an lifelong illness, I put on 20 pounds from stress-eating, I had to see a counselor for panic attacks) so I did a facebook cleanse of people from my past and deleted him. \n\nIt's been almost exactly a year since I did that, and while I don't want to be friends again I do want to reach out the olive branch by re-adding him on facebook. I don't hold anything against him; we're both engaged and with who we're supposed to be with. He's a nice person and it'd be cool to be able to at least wish him happy birthday once a year instead of the petty \"I UNFRIENDED you because facebook MEANS EVERYTHING\" sort of deal. \n\nI deleted him because I was going through a serious rough patch and was cutting out anything from my past, and not because I hate him and want him back or anything like that.\n\nI know most people are anti-adding exes on facebook but that's not what I'm here to ask. My fiance is fine with it and I'm not trying to *break anyone up.* I'm asking if most people would waste much time wondering about it if they saw a friend request from an ex they haven't talked to in a year. I don't want to do it if it comes off creepy or stalkerish.", "summary": "I'd just like to get some opinions on what an ex boyfriend might think about a facebook request from an ex after a year NC, if he'd spend any time thinking about it at all. "}
{"id": "t3_f0u6p", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "Dear GetMotivated: The cause of procrastination?", "post": "Hi,\nI'm noticing something interesting today. I'm back to work and have three things I need to do. Two of those things I WANT to do, and one of them I HAVE to do.\n\nSo in my mind this puts the \"HAVE TO\" task at the top of the list of priorities, which also puts *procrastinating* on that task at the top of the list of priorities.\n\nI've hit the end of the day and have achieved neither the \"HAVE TO\" task, nor the \"WANT TO\" tasks. \n\nI compare this to the day before when I did my \"WANT TO\" tasks first, and simply breezed through my \"HAVE TO\" obligations for the rest of the day. \n\n**Perhaps there is something to this.** When you prioritise things you DON'T want to do, it makes you procrastinate - and procrastination creates a feeling of failure and puts your mind into a \"reluctance/apathy\" state which carries over into screwing up the things you DO want to achieve.", "summary": "Perhaps if we work first on the things we want to do, we're better preparing our minds for achieving the things we HAVE to do."}
{"id": "t3_2emb3u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] whether I should trust my gut feeling regarding a female friend [22 F]", "post": "Last weekend I invited friends over to a house party. A female friend, who I've known for about 4 months, enthusiastically responds while everyone else ended up flaking. We aren't great friends but we have a shared group of friends and have hung out a fair amount. \n\nOn the day of the party, I message her the details for the party expecting her to flake out as well. However she ends up coming and we have a pretty fun time. \n\nHowever, about two weeks ago, I broke up with a girl who I had been casually dating. I'm wondering if I'm just subconsciously trying to look for signals that aren't really there. \n\nI'm hoping a removed party can look at our interactions and judge the events. \n\n1. She's recently been helping me a lot with a side project of mine. She has a pretty expansive network and I've been leveraging that a lot recently. \n\n2. At the party, she generously shared her coke with me. However she's been in the process of setting me up with her contact. Her generosity could have been more about giving me a test run.\n\n3. She often followed me into secluded areas of the house and felt really comfortable about it. However she never sat up right beside me. She typically maintained a few inches of space.\n\n4. I'm not sure if she knew I had a gf when we first met? Also my relationship with the aforementioned gf was slated to end in August. She was moving away and neither party wanted to do long distance. A lot of our mutual friends knew this but I'm not sure if she specifically knew this. \n\nDuring the night, I operated under the assumption that we were simply friends. If I made a move and she wasn't interested, it would have been awkward trying to leverage her network for my side project. Plus a part of me feels like its best to just have some alone/me time at the moment.", "summary": "Hung out with a female friend and had a fun time. Wondering if recent events are making me look for signs that aren't there."}
{"id": "t3_2l1g9u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What does it mean when a guy [24M] says \"I don't know about all of that\" to my friend[23F]", "post": "I'm asking this on the behalf of my friend. \n\nShe was dating a guy for about a month and she broke it off because she was unsure and she kept going back and forth on her decision. And then he didn't want to deal with it anymore so they stopped talking.  \n\nHe dated another girl fort three months whom he ended up breaking up with. During which my friend texted him and asked to be friends, he told her he liked another girl and doesn't think it's a good idea because he wasn't ready for it. \n\nThen after they broke up, she texted him and asked to be friends. \n\nHe said \"Maybe we could be friends, I'm not sure how close she'll be. \nShe said \"I'll text you in about a week to hang out if you're up for it.\nHe said \"Yea I don't know about all that yet\"\n\nNow my friend wants to invite him out to meet up with her and her friends when they go out for her birthday. Should she? For the record, I don't think she should. \n\nAlso she wants me to ask, is this getting to desperate?", "summary": "Friend is hung up on an ex she was back and forth with. The last time she asked him to hang out he said \"I don't know about that.\" Now she wants to try again, should she?"}
{"id": "t3_105uyt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "21f, hes moving back home, Where do I go from here?", "post": "So I have been seeing this guy for a few months. He's 23 btw. He's from a different province that I am and has been here for about a year and a half I believe. His roommate kicked him out so her parents could move in with her so he's been looking for a place to live. I offered him to stay with me till he finds a place but he didn't want to which is fine. We were going to make us official once he moved and settled in but today he tells me he's moving back home because he can't find a place to live here and apparently his employer wasn't giving him any work. I don't know where to go from here, I honestly believe that he's \"the one\" and I know people say that all the time but I truly believe that he is. Where do I go from here?", "summary": "guy I'm pretty much in love with is moving back home which isn't in the same province. I'm utterly broken-hearted and have no idea what to do or where to go from here."}
{"id": "t3_4xwnbw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [28F] girlfriend[28F] of 2 years found out her sister's boyfriend is cheating on her, she wants to tell her. What do?", "post": "Long story short, my girlfriend is the eldest in her family. Mama Bear through and through. Three younger siblings, Kay (21F), Jay(19M), and Bee(17F). Recently,  she came into the knowledge that Bee had been seen in bed with Kay's boyfriend(21M) while Kay was at work.\n\nLong story long, Brother comes down to visit recently and walks into the family home where Kay, the boyfriend, and Bee still live. He's looking around and walks past Bee's open door where he sees two people clearly having sex under the blankets. Figures Bee has a guy over and goes into the kitchen for a while looking for others in the house. Turns out there are only two people in the whole house. No other cars.\nHe then realizes that it was Bee and Kay's boyfriend in the bed together. He confronts Bee saying what she's doing is messed up. She says she has no idea what he's even talking about. \nHe lets it go because there is family trip planned and all the siblings are going north to visit family together. And pulling all this drama out right before the trip would be a seriously terrible idea. So he tells their Dad about it after the trip is over. And my girlfriend's dad tells her about it. She immediately calls Jay to verify and get details. \n\nDetails are verified. This is bad. \n\nShe wants to tell Kay or find a way to get them to break up. I don't want Kay to be with someone who cheats on her but I know that if my girlfriend tells her then the relationship between all the siblings is going to suffer greatly.\n\nBut the boyfriend lives in that house with both sisters. This could have happened a bunch of times or just the once. There is no real proof and everything is circumstantial.\n\nSo neither of us know what to do now. Any advice?\n\nDisclaimer: In my state, 17 is the legal age of consent, so there is no laws being broken.", "summary": "My girlfriend's brother caught their sister's boyfriend cheating on her with the youngest sister. Should my girlfriend tell her that her boyfriend is cheating on her?"}
{"id": "t3_rztha", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have a horrible memory. Could I have some sort of early onset Alzheimer's?", "post": "I'm in my early twenties. My grandfather had Alzheimer's.\n\nI've always had somewhat of a bad memory but I feel that lately it's gotten worse and it's starting to scare the shit out of me.\n\nA few examples:\n\nA couple of nights ago, I was sitting at a bar with a friend. She went outside to answer her phone and a guy sitting next to me leaned over. \"Do you work at ____?\" he says. \"Yes, I do.\" \"Oh, I was there the other day and thought I recognized you.\" I almost have no recollection of this man (granted, I'm a girl, maybe he noticed me for that reason?). I don't think I could ever remember a random face, especially if I were to see them somewhere unrelated.\n\nI work in sales. I see a lot of people on a daily basis. I could have a client in the morning leave (after meeting them for the first time) and if they stopped by again that evening, I barely remember them (if at all) until they remind me of their name/what we talked about.\n\nTwo more instances.\n\nI don't remember most of my childhood. As far as schooling, I couldn't tell you most of the children I went to school with. If I saw someone, I probably wouldn't recognize them.\n\nThe scariest part of it is I can't remember a lot from my past relationships. I haven't been in many, just a few long term relationships. I was in love with these men. I mean, I remember THEM but most of our time spent together in a blur. My first boyfriend, in high school.. We were together for 2 years. I remember his face and his house but my feelings, I've forgotten.\n\nIs this normal? Maybe I'm fretting over nothing. I'm just terrified about loosing my memory. It's what makes us who we are.", "summary": "Is not being able to remember certain events from your past normal? I'm talking from years of schooling (details), old flames, etc. to not recognizing a person that you met for the first time a week ago at work."}
{"id": "t3_1c4076", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "I(F, 21) have roommate(F, 22) legal/police questions.", "post": "So I (F, 21) recently moved out of my apartment and got a new one living by myself. I still pay rent at the old apartment and put a lock on my door because without it my roommate would take over my room and that isn't fair since I pay 450 for an apartment that I do not live in... So anyways I pay rent do not pay for internet and electric (obviously since I do not use it) Heat and water is included. **Now I was wondering** when I go over to the apartment to make sure my door is still locked, if I see that it is not (roommate does not have a key obviously), could I call the cops on her for breaking and entering? We are both on the lease. I'm pretty sure you guys are gonna say no, you can't but I just want to make sure. My room at the apartment is completely empty so she couldn't steal anything I just think it is entirely unfair for me to pay rent at an apartment when nothing of it is mine. You know what I mean? So what can I do if my door has been unlocked?? I am in New York by the way.", "summary": "Wondering if I can call the cops on my roommate for breaking into my locked bedroom, if I cannot do that what can I do to keep myself from being taken advantage of??  In New York"}
{"id": "t3_2zqhlz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (22M) new \"girlfriend\" (20F) doesn't seem to be fully committed.", "post": "I've known this girl for about 6 years and we've always been really good friends, until a couple weeks ago when I decided to grow a pair and act on my feelings for her.  It turns out that she also had feelings for me (huge relief) and we ended up making out and spending the night together (no sex).  We've hung out nearly everyday since then, and she always wants to stay the night at my house.  I have no problem with that, but I can see potential problems.  Anyways, before we started this whole \"relationship\" (keep in mind we've never discussed being officially in a relationship), she had been talking to another guy whom she liked, who to be honest, is an asshole.  Maybe that's part of the reason she's attracted to him.  I knew of this, and it somewhat sparked some motive to make her mine before it's too late.  \n\nFor the first week of our \"relationship\", she seemed really normal and into me.  However, for the past few days she has seemed somewhat distant and less interested in kissing, which is odd because she still wants to cuddle and stay the night all the time.  I've seen her texting the other guy, so I'm thinking maybe that has something to do with it.  I plan on talking to her very soon so I can get a clear understanding how she feels about all this.  My question is, how should I go about this? Should I be gentle and understanding, or should I play the alpha role and take control?  This girl has been one of my best friends for years and I've always wanted to become more, so I don't want to screw this up before it even gets started.", "summary": "New \"girlfriend\" is starting to seem distant and less interested in kissing.  Another guy (an asshole), whom she previously cared for, may be the reason.  Looking for advice on how to approach this with her."}
{"id": "t3_1wtlf1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[M/21] Went on a date last night with awesome girl [20/F]", "post": "So I went on a date with a girl last night. Not really sure how she feels about it today. So we met up at a bar in the town she lives in, and we talked for about an hour, with only slight pauses. She was laughing at my jokes and everything. Then we go upstairs to another part of a restaurant and meet up with her friend. This guy is outgoing and loud, me being the silent type, obviously don't have much to say. My date and I start holding hands and hugging all that stuff. I get a kiss also which is great, but most of the time she is talking to her friend. After the date I asked her if this was going to happen again, which she responded with, \"Idk, maybe..\" This led me to believe she wasn't interested.\n\nI texted her this morning, saying Goodmorning, and I still haven't gotten a response yet. Is it safe to say she's not interested. Do I ask?", "summary": "Went out with girl, had great time. Meet up with her friend, I'm quiet most of the night, but she's holding my hand and smiling at me. Don't know if she's still interested. Do I ask?"}
{"id": "t3_jtzv5", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Runnit, my knee is really painful...", "post": "Hi to all at Runnit,\n\nBasically, my knee gets really painful after a run (and other times), just below the Patella. After a run it gets painful walking down stairs (not excruciating, just sore) and I can't sit with me knees bent in the same position for long periods of time (by god, when I do, the stretch afterward feels AMAZING). \n\nAnyway, I've been to the doctors about it and there isn't anything that should be causing the chronic pain (it's ongoing, just flares up post-run), there's some mild shift in the Patella, some issues with splines and a bit of premature degradation of the knee joint. However, \"this is fairly common\" (Docs words) and shouldn't be causing me the issue so I'm a bit stuck...\n\nMy next step is an arthroscopic examination with a camera and then an operation OR to work out if it's something to do with my running style that's causing it.\n\nHas anyone had any previous experience of this kind of thing?", "summary": "Dull ache in lower left knee (below patella) flares up into considerably pain following a run - Doctors can't see anything really wrong - help."}
{"id": "t3_3ybwbp", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Looking for advice on whether to take an apartment or stay at home with my parents longer", "post": "So, right now I live at home with my parents in NYC. I feel really stressed out about living with them-- like I'm a burden, like I get in their way. They also stress me out sometimes. I am very noise sensitive, and sometimes when they fight about things it makes me feel really non functional and ruins my day.\n\nI was apartment hunting a bit because of this and found a place in the city that I thought was great. It's a little out of my budget long term, but it's month to month so I thought I could just get it for three months or so and not lose too much money on rent. I tentatively agreed to take it, but no money changed hands. The guy told me that someone else wanted it but that if I could pay the deposit before it her, the room was mine.\n\nThen two days went by where I didn't hear from the guy renting the place. I assumed that someone else had taken it and they just didn't want to tell me (this has happened to me a lot looking for a room share). \n\nHowever while time went by I started thinking about it and decided I wasn't sure about this place. The rent is hundreds of dollars a month more than I could afford, and I would have a lot of roommates (about 7), so it wouldn't even be quiet, which is the main thing I'm looking for. \n\nThe guy just got back to me today asking when I could make the deposit, and I had to tell him I wasn't sure I would. He wrote back saying they were counting on me taking the place and this would make a lot of problems for them. I feel bad about what happened, but I also don't think I should have to take this place when all I did was express interest. He also apparently forgot to call me back to discuss putting down the deposit, which made me lose confidence in him as a landlord.\n\nAt the same time, I'm growing more and more frustrated with living at home, and this place is about the best deal I could get for an apartment in this city in terms of location, neighborhood, and flexibility on the lease.", "summary": "should I take a possibly sketchy apartment that is over my budget but could be temporary, or  just make peace with living at home longer?"}
{"id": "t3_4z010p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with my boyfriend [26M] of 2 years, admitted to kissing someone else and I'm heartbroken.", "post": "I'm a 25 year old male and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. I've only ever had one other relationship before him and he is my first and only love - I absolutely adore him and would do anything for him.\n\nWe went on holiday a month or so ago with our friends and after he had an argument with one of them, he admitted that about a month prior, after a night out with that same friend, he ended up kissing somebody else and didn't stop it - and that he was only telling me because he didn't want for me to hear it from the friend. \n\nI was, and still am, completely devastated. I keep trying to tell myself it was just a kiss but can't help wondering if it was more than that. I'm annoyed at the fact he didn't tell me about it because he wanted to, had it not been for the fact that he and his friend had an argument, I probably still wouldn't know now.\n\nI'm really trying to work through it but at the moment I feel so alone. We are both trying to make it work as the 2 years we have had together have been amazing, but ultimately I feel betrayed. \n\nAbout a week prior to him telling me, after a few drinks we had a stupid drunken argument and he started to accuse me of wanting to hook up with somebody else - which isn't true, and we ended up having probably the worst argument that we have had to date - yet he was the one who had actually been unfaithful!\n\nSorry if this post is rambling and seems disjointed, I'm upset by it all today and just wanted to get it all out.\n\nHas anybody else found themselves in a similar situation? What did you end up doing to get through it?", "summary": "Boyfriend of 2 years and first love admitted to kissing someone else, only told me as he was scared a mutual friend may tell me. Currently struggling with the feeling of betrayal and isolation."}
{"id": "t3_2zgyh0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By Eating Toast", "post": "This actually happened today...\n\nSo usually when I wake up I hit snooze on my phone around 5 times and get out of bed in just enough time to get everything done and get out the door in just the right amount of time to make it to work on time...maybe. Instead of just waking up earlier I have gotten into the practice of setting my clothes out the night before, and multi-tasking to make breakfast while brushing my teeth and this morning instead of oatmeal I decided on buttered toast with cheese. This is where it all began.\n\nSo I throw the toast into the toaster oven, set it to that perfect golden brown setting, and head into the bathroom to brush my teeth. As I come back into the kitchen there is smoke (not a lot but more than bread should let out) filling my kitchen and I think 'How the hell did I burn the toast I wasn't gone for that long' so I head over to the toaster and as I open it, some smoke billows out but my bread is maybe halfway done toasting. I figure it could have maybe been some food me and my girlfriend had cooked the night before that was dried and burned on the element.\n\nSo without thinking too much about it I throw some butter on it and a few pieces of asiago and fold it up in hopes the heat will melt both. As I start driving I take a bite and it tastes awful. It tastes like smoke (which isn't too bad) but there is something else - some bitter, horrible taste. I eat the piece because I was hungry dammit! So then I go for a second bite and I couldn't do it, as much as I needed to eat i just couldn't. So I text my girlfriend (she has to be at her work an hour and a half after I do) to check the toaster/don't use it because something is in there that shouldn't be. She then sends me a text and said \"Yeah there's a piece of dried sweet potato....and 3 burnt stinkbugs.", "summary": "Running late for work, made toast, smoke happened but toast wasn't burnt, ate a piece, was covered in burnt stinkbug juices"}
{"id": "t3_4n4u0l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I have a crush on my best friend [21F/22M] and i dont know if I want to", "post": "recently, I just got out of a longish term relationship. Obviously I was upset but alas all my friends came to my rescue. My best guy friend spent a lot of time with me before he left for the summer. He and the rest of my friends and family helped me get over my ex pretty quickly and I can say I'm pretty over the past right now. \n\nThe new problem is that, said friend and I kept in contact. By that I mean, we've been talking the whole past month. He's always been there even when I was dating my ex, and I feel more of a connection with him. I believe I may have developed a crush for my best friend and it's driving me insane. I'm convinced he isnt into me. All my friends, however, think the opposite and are telling me to go for it. I could possibly be idealizing it and I don't want to idealize my best friend. I love our relationship as friends but I can't help wonder if there's more. I'm so very confused right now, should I pursue or should I just keep it the way it is? I don't wanna miss out on an opportunity but I don't want it to be awkward either.", "summary": "I have a crush on my best friend and I don't think he's into me. should I pursue or just keep things the way they are? how do I convince myself I'm idealizing it so I can stop crushing?"}
{"id": "t3_iz7hp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Am I a horrible monster if I (a guy) refuse to wear a dress to work for charity?", "post": "This week was declared a casual week at work.  One coworker sent out a reply to everyone that she'd be wearing shorts and her bathing suit all week, because she's off all week.\n\nI'm a smartass and had a somewhat boring Friday afternoon, so I sent out an email saying I'd be wearing a dress to work since it's been pretty hot out for the last few weeks and jeans are too hot.\n\nFast forward to today--I come on and have about six emails in my inbox from coworkers pledging about a total of $200 to charity if I actually go through with this and wear a dress to work until at least noon.  I'd just dismiss it as \"I can't, it's inappropriate,\" except that one of the people putting in $20 is my boss--which of course means I have tacit approval to actually show up in drag.  Shit just got real.\n\nThing is, I really would rather not have to do this and I was obviously joking.  Now I look like a horrible monster if I refuse, since it'd be depriving some charity of a pretty nice donation.  Am I a horrible monster if I don't go through with this?", "summary": "Jokingly said I'd wear a dress to work and have now been asked to put my money where my mouth is.  I'd really prefer not to, but now I have a moral dilemma."}
{"id": "t3_1y5dt3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my BF [23 M] 1y 3m, He doesn't \"see a future with me\" but things are fine. (entire relationship explained warning)", "post": "Here are the cliff notes. \nMy boyfriend is very blunt\nHe has custody of his son and family who I haven't met yet \nHe is very choosy about letting girls meet them. \nThey all know about me.\nHe has detachment issues and he's been cheated on countless times.\nWhen I met him, as a security guard at my apartment, he met a large sum of my family, so he has a better idea about my family than i know about his.\n\nBottom line, I'm in love with him. He has been the best part of my life since the worst time of my life. He helps me grow and I've helped him through some finance troubles as well. We're great friends and our sex life is killer. i think we have similar interest. We're both introverts, we like simple things. \n\nHe recently took his test to be a corrections officer but if that doesn't fall through, he has serious plans on joining The National Guard. We discussed it and being away that long... things can happen. He said he doesn't want to hold me back and I thought that meant I was holding him back because i'm not a cheater. I never gave him a reason to believe that I would. He insists that he cares about me and he isn't looking for anyone else.\n\nThis conversation was weeks ago and we agreed to keep things where they were for now. We had a great v-day and since then, I've been feeling great about where we were. Last night, we were having a good time on the phone and I don't remember how we led up to this, but i remember him saying \"I don't see a future with you\" He didn't say it sad or with an attitude or anything BUT he said it nonetheless. Neither of us talk about the future but it would be nice to to know he could entertain the idea of me being in his life... or just not say anything about it all unless he wants me out of his life now. He hasn't given me a reason accept that he may be leaving for a while due to the National Guard.", "summary": "All I can think about is what am I doing wrong? He finds me sexually attractive, our relationship is as smooth as idk what, so why did he say he doesn't see a future with me?"}
{"id": "t3_14zqzl", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [28/m] haven't been in a real relationship in years; Now I'm totally lost and don't know what to do with the girl [28/f] I just met.", "post": "We actually met briefly before Thanksgiving through a mutual friend. I only got her name ('Eva' for this post) and we exchanged a few words. This mutual friend has been insisting since then that I go on a date with her. I initially resisted because of my busy work schedule, but honestly I think I resisted because I have not had a real relationship in years (about 8 years) and I had a 'fling' that ended painfully about 3 years ago. I eventually gave in and agreed to go out with my mutual friend, his wife, and 'Eva' this past Friday. It turned out great and we seemed to click but did not get to talk much because we went out to clubs and bars. The next day I got a text from her (she somehow added her number to my phone without my knowledge!) which led to an invitation to her best friend's birthday party. I met a lot of her friends (which was a bit intimidating being the 'random guy' at the party), and had lots of fun that night. Would that count as a date?\n\nShe is really attractive and funny and now I can't stop thinking about her. I realize we really don't know much about each other, but I think she's interested in me.  I have not texted her all day because I don't want to seem too pushy, but now I think that might have been a bad idea. Help! I want to go slow and build a relationship, but I don't know what to do. I've never gone on a date before and I don't know what to do or say to her. Does any one have a strategy guide for this kind of stuff?", "summary": "I'm really digging this girl I just met, but have no idea what to do. It's been far too long since I've had any sort of relationship, and I want to go slow."}
{"id": "t3_2jehkw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21M] just started dating my best friend [21F] 1 month ago and i feel like a rebound.", "post": "I have been best friends with my GF for 8 years prior to us getting together, we have been unofficial for roughly 6 months and started properly dating a month ago. However we both see that time as being together. It's pretty amazing but the only problem is i think she is still hung up on her ex. They broke up at the start of the year and she had admitted to me roughly 2 and half months ago she still had some feelings for him and on that same night said his name while we were having sex. I let this go but unfortunately it has eaten away at me over the last couple of months. Lately she says she has no feelings for him but i find that hard to believe.\nRecently she has started talking about trying to be friends again with him (he doesn't want that) and how much that upsets her. She also struggles with depression and anxiety and told me something that really gives her anxiety is thinking about having a fight with her ex next time she sees him. They also have a long history and were dating for 3 years.\nI don't know how to feel about this or what to do. I just wanted to talk to someone about it.", "summary": "best friend of 8 years is now my GF. GF talks about her ex a lot, wants to be friends with him even though he doesn't. Don't know how to feel."}
{"id": "t3_j19x6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the most messed up thing you can think of concerning a family member death?", "post": "When my grandma died it was a year and a half after my grandfather died, and it is forbidden by Greek Orthodox burial custom to open up a family grave and insert another coffin before two years have passed, so the only other option was to bury her in her parents' family grave, then re-dig her out after two years have passed for her and bury her along with her husband.\n\nWe knew all this, and on the same afternoon she died we started contacting her other relatives. When we got to her only living brother, he said we can't bury her in her family's grave.\n\n\"Why not?\"\n\n\"Because my wife is very sick and I'm afraid I'll need to reserve the space.\"\n\n\"But she was married to you, she's not of your parents' bloodline!\"\n\n\"I don't care, don't even try it!\"\n\nSo we rented another temporary grave after a lot of searching.\n\nThat was two years ago. His wife is alive and well.", "summary": "2 years ago my dead grandma's uncle didn't want her buried in the family grave because he wanted to bury his wife who is still alive."}
{"id": "t3_32ckbz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24M] have self-image issues and it's straining my relationship with my girlfriend [20F]", "post": "We've been together for 5 months.\n\nI've always been on the skinny side.  I was pretty much anorexic growing up.  I skipped lunch to save up lunch money.  And I'd skip meals to play games instead.\n\nHalfway through college, I wanted to change.  I hit the gym and started eating right.  I put on 30 lbs and look much better.\n\nAnd then I met my girlfriend.  She's my first.  I felt like all my hard work finally paid off.\n\nHowever, any time I miss meals or haven't worked out in a while, I'd get insecure.  I'd feel small and skinny.  I'd look visibly smaller in the mirror even though my friends assure me I haven't lost weight.\n\nAnd when I get insecure, I get clingy.  I feel afraid my girlfriend will leave me for being scrawny.  And the insecurity doesn't help to keep her around.\n\nI don't have time or money for a therapist.\n\nWhat can I do to fix myself?", "summary": "I have self-image issues.  It's making me insecure, which is causing problems with my relationship with my girlfriend."}
{"id": "t3_31fo0v", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (20M) girlfriend (19F) of 5 months treats oral as a reward for me.", "post": "By oral, I mean me going down on her, she has never went down on me once, she always says \" next time \", and honestly I'm not expecting one either because I love going down on her and thats good enough for me.\n\nSo, everytime after I go down on her, she elaborately tells me how much she enjoys it. She LOVES oral and I can make her come 8 out of 10 times, and it leaves both of us feeling extremely satisfied.\n\nOne small issue is that I'm always the one initiating it. She never once asked, and it's always me. I just thought she's shy, so hell, I love it, she loves it, I'll just initiate it then.\n\nHowever, I recently discovered this trend that led me to think  that she treats oral as a \" reward \", so to speak. We often make plans in advanced before oral, as time is not on our side, and I like to ask on days where I know we have more time together. However, whenever I have a disagreement with her, sorry, oral is cancelled. Whenever she's angry with me, no oral then. When she's not happy with me, guess what, oral plans for the whole week cancelled!\n\nIt's really starting to get on nerves because it's as though letting me go down on her is a favor to me. I tried talking to her about it, but she got defensive and claimed that she loves it and accuses me of accusing her. At the end of the conversation, she said \" I can't believe you just accused me of this, let's not have oral for this week. \" I couldn't believe my ears. Any ideas how i should do this, redditors?", "summary": "My gf thinks I'm getting all the pleasure from going down on her when she's the one moaning and calling out for god to take her"}
{"id": "t3_qabv5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I need some advice, I can't choose whether to pursue a solution to my problem, or give up on it.", "post": "(Warning: This is not a life threatening problem, if you don't want to listen to a issue that is anything less than a personal emergency, this post isn't for you. Thanks.)\n\nSome background information: Over the past 4 months or so, I developed what I thought was a pretty close friendship with a girl whom I had known for the majority of my life, but had never really taken time to speak with until this year. In that time I discovered that she was an absolutely awesome person; very smart, and very funny and just enjoyable to be around. Up until just a few weeks ago we would talk for 3-4 hours a day on Skype, and I enjoyed all of it.\n\nNow onto the problem: In the time I spoke to her, she mentioned Prom on several occasions, asking questions like \"Do you know what day Prom is\", also mentioning the occasion when other girls post dress pictures to Facebook, making it a semi-frequent topic for short amounts of conversation. Now I, lacking minor social skills, came to the conclusion that these were some kind of hints, and decided to man-up and ask her. After a relatively simple outing, on the way back home I decided that I would ask, and she proceeded to turn me down. In all honesty, getting turned down is not a huge deal, it is what follows that bothers me.\n\nSince that day, she has not spoken to me at all, it has been 3 weeks now. She wouldn't return any of my texts (all three that I sent over those weeks), removed me from Facebook, and then removed me from her Skype contacts. She avoids communicating with me in person, and appears to avoid me now. There is nothing that I would want more than to continue on as we were just several weeks ago, but she appears to want none of it. I think I may have overstepped my boundaries in asking her to Prom, but being completely put out in the cold like this seems ridiculous, and frustrates me to no end.\n\nMy question is whether I should attempt to repair what I thought was a excellent friendship, or should I just try to let her go?", "summary": "Asked a close friend to Prom, I was turned down, now she won't speak to me; should I try to fix what is broken, or just let her go?"}
{"id": "t3_w99k2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend self esteem issues.", "post": "Hey there /r/Relationships, I'm hoping I can find some solid advice here as usual. Here goes.\n\nQuick info: Me:19 out of school, working full time. Her: 18, still in school.\n\nI have been with my current girlfriend for about two months, and recently I just started noticing some ever growing self esteem issues. I've known her for around 6 months and I've heard her throw the occasional \"This makes me look fat.\" or \"I look terrible today!\" out, but nothing more than that. \n\nNow that we're dating, she is constantly saying how fat she is (She is far from it) and how she is going to start starving herself. She also talks about how she desires breast implants, a butt reduction and a tummy tuck. She's constantly speaking of killing herself because she's \"So fucking hideous and disgusting.\" I constantly try to reassure her that she is beautiful and lovely, but she never wants to hear it.\n\nI am assuming these feelings are feelings she has kept to herself as we've known one another and now has allowed to them to be heard because she has gotten comfortable. I do my best to compliment her and make her feel beautiful like she is, but it doesn't seem to be working. At this point it has begun to show in her personality and every day mood, she seems like she's lost some of the energy in her and happiness, which truly concerns me.\n\nReddit, what can I do to help my girlfriend out? She's a great person and is truly beautiful inside and out, now how can I get her to start believing this? I am strongly against self hate and I will not allow it to be a part of my relationship. Does anyone have any tips on how to make her feel as beautiful as she truly is?", "summary": "Girlfriend has a terrible self image due to years of verbal bashing from her family, causing stress on our relationship. I need help giving her a way to achieve a positive self image."}
{"id": "t3_2uz45k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 F] with my BF [27 M] am I going to ruin his career?", "post": "Be sure to explain in detail with line breaks.\n\nMy SO and I have been together for 3 months. We are definitely in the honeymoon phase and I am pretty sure I've never loved anyone as much as I love him. We worked together for 7 months before getting together so we had a long friendship that developed into a relationship. Back when we were just friends, my SO accepted a research fellowship in Germany. We live in the UK. We started the relationship knowing that we would have to do long distance, but it didn't seem like too much of burden because we were/are so happy. My SO went to Germany last week and is missing me a lot. The feeling is very mutual. \n\nFearing long distance, my SO applied for non-research post here in the UK and has gotten an interview. I am fairly certain he'll get the job and then he'll want to move back. I am not sure I want him to do that because he loves research and his fellowship is very prestigious. Having just finished his PhD, winning this kind of fellowship is almost unheard of and it's a chance for him to conduct his own research. In short, it's an amazing opportunity. The job in the UK is good money, it's in another department of where I currently work and it could lead to a senior management position, but I am afraid he'll only want to take it because he misses me. I also afraid giving up the fellowship will adversely affect his career in the future. \n\nI am so scared that he'll give up an amazing opportunity, move back to the UK and then once we've settled and the passion phase is over he will regret it. \n\nAm I going to ruin his career? I have never cared about someone else's happiness as much as I do his, and I really want to make sure that he is as successful as he can be both professionally and personally. I will support him no matter what, but I don't want to influence his decision at all. Is that even possible? Help? What do I do?", "summary": "My lovely SO is thinking of giving up an amazing work opportunity to be with me. How can I convince him not to factor me into his decision?"}
{"id": "t3_3ca3q6", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[Help] I know exercise should be judged for the individual dog, but I'm having trouble getting a read on my dog's limits", "post": "I've checked out past threads and found the general advice that it's best to judge your dog's exercise needs on a case by case basis, but I'm struggling to find my dog's ideal level, possibly because he's got such an irrepressible personality that I think he would run until he plowed head first into the ground. Also, we've been having unusually hot weather here (27C/80F not actually super hot, and I always take a bottle of water out for him), so he starts panting very early in his walk/run.\n\nInfo on the dog: Bobby is a 3year oldish shelter dog. He's a terrier mix, looks like a tall Yorkshire Terrier. When we got him he was underweight, he's now up to a healthy weight; my scales are broken at the moment but he's somewhere in the region of 7kg. I ramped up his exercise since he's reached a healthy weight, but I don't seem to be hitting a ceiling. He gets three walks a day, his morning and afternoon walks are almost always over 40min and can be over an hour (if they're any shorter, he'll get a 4th walk in the day). Most of the time I go out on the bike and depending where we are he's attached to my waist or running free, in which case he covers way more ground. His third walk is just a bedtime wee and is generally less the 20min and never with the bike. If he's had some tough runs over the course of few days I'll give him a lower activity day, but his level of activity don't seem to have a great deal of bearing on his mood and energy levels. Some days he's up and around looking to play murder the stuffy all day, some days he curls up on the couch with me and sleeps most of the day.\n\nI've been putting off making this thread, cos I'm not sure what any of you can say other than pay attention to your dog, but it's gotten to the point where I'm exercising him enough that I'm worrying I might be working him too hard. Are there any signs I could look out for?\n\n[Thanks for any help](", "summary": "My dog would joyfully run himself into a coma. How to tell if you're over exercising a dog with no desire to stop, ever?"}
{"id": "t3_3bgana", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] get jealous thinking about my girlfriend's [21/F] past.", "post": "Anyone have any tips for not being jealous over a person's past? \n\nI know it's irrational, as I have a past that's arguably much harder to think about.\n\nMy problem is thinking about my girlfriend having been with men. I've only ever been with women and worry she'll feel like there's something missing with me, or that it's an experience she can never quite have with me. \n\nIt's complicated by her having hooked up with a guy from her past after coming out and dating a girl. She says it was a mistake and terrible and it was long before we were together, but it still sometimes bothers me to think of. \n\nShe does not like men, says her past experience means nothing and she never even thinks about it, and I know that, but my anxiety sometimes gets the better of me?", "summary": "I get overly jealous thinking about my girlfriend having had sex with men before she came out. Tips for how to get over it?"}
{"id": "t3_2ye8fg", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "How to handle shitty roommate?", "post": "So I have a roommate who always asks me & our other roommate for rides. Her boyfriend is one of our good friends and he's always over at our place. She treats him like shit and we always feel bad for him; usually I end up trying to defend him or something. She is also rude to the rest of us (boyfriend definitely gets most of it though). She takes forever to wash her dishes and when she does, there is still fucking food on them, so I ended up re-washing them and now I got so fed up I finally moved my plates and stuff to a separate place. I want to just straight up tell her she's being a shitty person (and this is why I will not give her anymore rides or any help) but I still have to live with her for another 6 months. Any advice?", "summary": "shitty roommate, how can I tell them that I never want to help them because they're shitty (in a tactful way, since I'm stuck for another 6 months). or any other advice you have!"}
{"id": "t3_2yclks", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (m/29) proposed a month ago to my GF (f/23) of four years. Her parents demand a pre-nup", "post": "My GF and I have been dating for four years. About a month ago, I proposed, and she accepted. Marriage was something we had been talking about for months. We both wanted it, so the proposal itself was just procedural. Our relationship has been perfect. I honestly think we've fought twice over the last 4 years. She is the love of my life.\n\nA bit about our relationship: We met on a dating website. We've been happily living together for the last 3 years. Money has not ever been an issue for us. We split things down the middle. My half comes from my job and her half comes from her parents, as she just recently graduated college and is still looking for a job. My GF's parents are well-off. Very well-off. It's obvious just from their lifestyle, and the way the support their only daughter. I have a good relationship with them. I think (thought?) they liked me we we met.\n\nMy GF told her parents immediately after the proposal and everything was great. They expressed their happiness, and actually flew down the following day. Nothing about a pre-nup was mentioned to me or her.\n\nThen, yesterday, my GF told me that her father called her and asked her if she was getting a pre-nup. She told him no, and apparently they got into an argument. My GF later told me what happened, and told me that he \"demanded\" she get a pre-nup and threatened to cut her off if she didn't. Her feeling right now is that she is mad at them and she isn't going to fold to their demand. \n\nI have a lot of problems with this. First, her parents seem to think they can control her and by extension me. Second, the fact that they used threats. Third, the fact that this didn't come up until a month AFTER we announced our engagement. Forth, what it means they think of our relationship. \n\nI don't know what is going to happen right now, hopefully this whole thing will \"go away\" but if push comes to shove I'm trying to decide if I will sign on the dotted line. Should I?", "summary": "GF and I are engaged. Her parents want a pre-nup. I'm trying to decide if I would be okay with this if push comes to shove."}
{"id": "t3_13uu24", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "18F can't move on from past relationship", "post": "I am her boyfriend and am [x-posting] this from /r/ihaveissues.\n\n>I am still in love with my ex boyfriend. It's been at least two years since we've broken up. He was my first love, my first time and I also had his child. We're still good friends, but I'll always want more. Is this normal? My current boyfriend gets angry about it, even though I see no way to change it. I know that I'll never get back together with my ex, but I still think that my feelings for him will always control how much of my heart I actually put into a relationship. Do I try to fix it? Make my boyfriend get over it? Give up on all love together? :P", "summary": "18F still in love with ex. 18M angry about it. Relationship length: 10 months. Looking for advice on how to move on."}
{"id": "t3_10rii2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Need birthday present ideas for BF. 22. Only 2 weeks left. Help!?", "post": "First off all I would like to clear up: **Sexytimes will be provided.** \n\nI know you guys are brilliant, so I need some ideas. I will list all the criteria below. \n\n-\tTurning 22. \n-\tRelationship = 6.5 years\n-\tWe are both mature. Graduated university and recently completed professional exams. \n-\tWorking full time (office).\n-\tMy budget: ~$300\n\nWhat he is into\u2026\n\n-\tHe is not crazy about video games. Only PC games that he gets himself. \n-\tHe is very mature, and if he needs something he will get find a way to get it himself. \n-\tHe LOVES technology\u2026and he is well covered. \n-\tHe likes the finer things\u2026which tends to be a little pricey/hard to find. \n\nPresents to date: \n\n-\t16: Turtles (real ones, because he wanted them)\n-\t17: Lego. He loves Lego. \n-\t18: Blender (inside joke) \u2013 it was useful. \n-\t19: Good scotch (Legal drinking age in Canada)\n-\t20: Safety Razor + essentials\n-\t21: Belt, leather gloves, wallet, professional accessories.", "summary": "BF turning 22, and he pretty much has everything he needs/wants. I need ideas for gifts that are useful, grown up, and fun!"}
{"id": "t3_4tzc6o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[24M] in limbo with my [23F] \"friend\" would like advice.", "post": "I'm a 24M in love with a 23F. I have known her for many years and have always loved her. I was really young and told her how I felt too soon. Fast forward 6 years. In that time we rarely got to hang out because of distance but we always talked a lot. In the past year I've seen her 5 times or so and we have at least kissed each time but she generally gets upset afterwards and says I don't respect her boundaries. \n\nI honestly just go by the signs she gives me. She wanted to be with me when we first met but I was about to start college so I decided not to. I regret that. We've never been officially together but have been as close to that as can be. A year after that. She went over seas and fell for someone else and broke my heart. Since then, I feel like I have idealized her and all my energy and focus has gone to trying to get her. \n\nWe have a very special connection and I always felt that if we lived close enough we would have a much better chance. I saw her today and we kissed but she just got out of a relationship and said she isn't interested in pursuing anything. Keep in mind I've known her for years and I love her more than anything. But my life has revolved around her and the rest of my life has gone to shit. I have a hard time controlling my emotions towards her. She says I don't control my desires with her and that I don't respect her. This makes her uncomfortable around me. I don't mean to be like that. She goes to school pretty far away and because of all that she is unlikely to invite me over. I can't handle hearing she's hooking up/dating other guys. I am the happiest man when I'm with her but I also feel like I deserve more. I also think I should focus on myself and become my best but that means leaving behind the woman I love most. Thoughts?", "summary": "in love with a close \"friend\" we have hooked up but she wants to be friends. 7 years in and my life is too focused on her. We rarely see each other."}
{"id": "t3_2qbkc3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my boyfriend [27 M] of two months, how do I slow down?", "post": "I recently started seeing someone exclusively, and it seems we are having a lot of communication issues and I'm not sure how to approach them. \n\nI have been in romantic relationships pretty consistently since the age of 15. They are not always serious, but the casual ones are always casual because I am usually seeing a few people at once. When I get into exclusive relationships, they seem to progress very quickly. If I've made up my mind that someone is worth investing in, I go all-in (to an extent, I mean - I've never planned to marry anyone or anything like that - but I do take monogamous relationships seriously once I decide to be in them). \n\nThe person I am dating now was last in a relationship two years ago with someone he dated for 6 years. He is really sweet and fun and we get along great. The trouble is, he's sort of taciturn and seems disconnected. I've asked him about it in the past and he was pretty passive in his response but still insisted that he wants to be dating me. I just feel like right now, we should be very excited about each other and everything should be romantic and nice. Instead, I feel sort of unwanted and bummed out. He went out of town for 5 days and didn't call me once. I got a few texts, but he didn't seem excited to come back at all. I don't know how to express my expectations and the like without seeming like I am expecting too much from him or something. We are supposed to go on holiday together in two days and I am feeling very apprehensive. I really want to go on the trip we've planned, but don't want to spend the whole time feeling insecure and bad. Best course of action?", "summary": "Boyfriend of two months couldn't seem more disinterested in our relationship, not sure how to bring it up. Going on holiday together in two days. When/how should I handle our communication issues?"}
{"id": "t3_1n62kt", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [20/F] and my (ex?) is [19/M]. We were once considered an official, but not a public couple.", "post": "I talked to this guy online i liked for a little while, but eventually we find that we need to take the same classes at the University. We eventually moved in together, expecting nothing to happen. However, a kiss happened, and a lot of cuddling/relationship talk happened. We rocked back and forth from making the relationship \"a summer thing\" and carrying it on into the school year. We eventually agreed that it would carry on into the school year, but take it slow because he didn't want to be in a relationship just yet. We sneak out and cuddle and whatnot the second night, but it seems as though another girl liked him as well. She likes him, and I like him, but from what he says, he only likes me and does not like her. One night he tells me he is sleeping, but I find that he's in the room with that girl, alone. He sleeps over, and tells me nothing. He doesn't seem to tell me until i asked him, and I accept his apology, but am hurt because he lied/avoided the question. Now we've talked and somewhat agreed that we should take a break, but I'm really vulnerable. I tell him that he can hang out with her because she doesn't know we were once in a relationship, but it hurts me a lot to see them together. I want to be/stay in the relationship with him, but it seems he doesn't want to, and I will have to get over it. Now i'm stuck deciding whether or not I want to keep the feelings i have for him and hope that he will still like me or get over her and just watch her be alone with him all the time.", "summary": "Not sure whether or not to keep an unknown relationship going while another person is flirting with my (ex)SO."}
{"id": "t3_zp14u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Proposing to boyfriend[21] and need ideas, please help?", "post": "So, boyfriend[21] and I[21f] have been together for over 3 years and I've decided that it's high time we get hitched, so I'm planning on proposing to him in December. The only thing is, I have no idea how to do it.\n\n I know that he would want something private and not too grand, but if it's too subtle, I don't think he'd realize I was seriously asking. I want to incorporate some nerdy things, but as my interests lie elsewhere, I don't know much about it to do anything really cool. Google isn't very helpful, so I turn to you for any ideas or advice you can give.", "summary": "Proposing to my boyfriend, need some cute, inextravagant, nerdy ideas on how to do it."}
{"id": "t3_2i3rkp", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by picking my nose", "post": "This is probably one of the grossest things that's ever happened to me. For a bit of context, I've been very sick over the past week or so, and just coming to the end of all the coughing, congestion, etc, right around now. So I was lying on my bed watching some youtube videos and I realized a blockage in my right nostril. Not uncommon, I think, still somewhat congested from the last week. I'm sniffling and coughing, trying to lodge whatever is in my nose free of its dark and mysterious chambers. After much non-success for my efforts, I think maybe I can get at it with a finger. I begin to dig away like a 2 year old who just discovered that the round finger peg perfectly fits in the round nostril hole, and I feel something shift. After giving one final triumphant sniffle, I feel something suck back out of my nose and down my throat. Eugh... but I can breathe! We all know the feeling of sudden nasal clarity after a week-long struggle with congestion, glorious! I close my laptop and fall asleep.\nI awake later in the night with the feeling of something cracking and slightly wet on my face. When I get up and turn the light on, I realize my folly. It must have been a scab or something that I dislodged from my nose, because my bed looked like a crime scene. Blood and snot and all sorts of lovely things covered my pillow and around the head of my bed. I just stood open-mouthed for a minute, not believing I had made such a mess from a simple bloody nose. New sheets and pillow now, I guess...", "summary": "I was sick, I picked my nose, scab was removed, blood ensued, shopping for new bedsheets tomorrow."}
{"id": "t3_13wzz0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have you ever known that who you're with is \"The one\"? How did you know?", "post": "I'm young and stupid, and I know that there's reason to believe I have no idea what I'm even talking about, but I truely believe that my SO is the one I'll be with for the rest of my life. I was in an abusive relationship with a boy 3 years older than I for the past three years, and my current SO makes me realize how stupid I was to even stay in a situation like that. My ex would verbally and mentally abuse me every day and night, calling me at early hours of the morning because he couldn't sleep, or had a nightmare. He'd yell and scream at me for not helping enough, or for being over bearing. A few times it came to him pushing and choking me. Now, let's just say that those incidents did not roll over well with a southern bell. He was bipolar manic, and never took his multiple medications as he should have. I overlooked too much, and was just willing myself to be ignorant. I cheated. He abused. I cried. He controlled. If we had been a song, we were \"Kim\"- Eminem. Eventually I was numb and lost to the pain I felt. But my current SO showed me everything I was never allowed to believe was real. Our relationship grows each day and every moment, and every time I breathe I just feel like he's the only thing keeping my tried to earth(besides gravity). My ex and I haven't seen each other or spoke since june 5th or 6th of this year. This is the longest I have ever been away from/without him and I haven't felt the usual need to relapse into him again. My SO keeps me sane, and I feel like he truely saved me. I want to know that out of all the sob stories I hear, and the hurt people I find, that there are people out there who have found their \"One\". I'm asking you all to tell me what you have, what you lack, and what you want. Are they \"the one\"? How do you know? <3", "summary": "Had an abusive ex. I cheated, he abused. I found my \"one\" who lifted me from the ruins of a past I can never forget."}
{"id": "t3_4a37uy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need advice. Ex-BF (20m) from 3 years ago will not leave me alone (20f) he is stalking me, posting things on the internet about me, I'm sick of it.", "post": "I didn't know where else to post this but I need advice. I dated this guy (20m now) in high school when I was 15 (20f now) for a little over a year, and he is still obsessed with me. It's been YEARS. \n\nEvery couple of months I will get strange messages or comments online and I have no way to prove its him I just know it is. \n\nHe posts hateful, disgusting things from fake accounts, and things like that. I know he does this because when I dated him so long ago, he did the same thing to his ex-gf before me. It's ridiculous, I'm so sick of it and I don't know what to do. \n\nI've tried ignoring him, I haven't spoken to him in over 4 years. But he continues to do things like this. I have his number, I could call him and try to ask him to leave me alone but that's what he wants, my attention. \n\nHe is a psychopath, and I want more than anything for him to leave me alone forever but I just don't know what action to take.\n\nEveryone is telling me to ignore him but part of me wants to call him and confront him because honestly I think it might scare him so much he would stop, but maybe not.  \n\nI'm just very uncomfortable knowing there he is out there, trying to keep constant tabs on me and plotting ways to make me feel uncomfortable.", "summary": "Ex-bf of many years ago won't leave me alone, cyber stalking me and harassing me on the Internet, for multiple years. Not sure what kind of action to take, if any."}
{"id": "t3_1opcxc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She [F/17] told me she is trying quit self harming and I [M/17] am doing everything I can to help but she hasn't quit at all.", "post": "I don't blame her, I have been where she has been, just self harming to get rid of stress. Im really trying to get her to stop, she just doesn't see the point of stopping but I know from my own experience that its dragging her down.  \nShe told me she quit, I believed her. She gave me little reports of how the day went and kept me updated on everything. I was skyping with her last night and I noticed a fresh eraser burn on her hand. She doesn't know I saw it but when I asked her later that evening how the day went she said nothing happened and that she didnt self harm.  \nSo, she is lying to me. I know its a very touchy subject for her and just like me a few years ago she is a addicted to it. How can I make her a little bit more honest about this without me forcing her?", "summary": "Girlfriend self harms, she says she quit but I noticed a fresh eraser burn when I was skyping with her. How can I make her more open about this without me forcing her to tell me?"}
{"id": "t3_3zj6cg", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Blasting music vs sleep", "post": "My mom's boyfriend is a lazy ass who doesn't help her with anything and just stays with us rent free. He's an alcoholic and drinks everyday. Though he does work a few times a week, not sure what time. \n\nSo when he drinks, he passes out. He leaves his shitty music on blasting. Most of the time I fall asleep and it doesn't bother me but it really got to me tonight, as it's 2am on a Tuesday. I expected him to turn it off by 11 or 12 at the latest. \n\nSo I looked up how to disable his Internet connection from the smart TV that he's blasting it from. I tried installing my routers app, nothing. Tried going to my ip address router, nothing I could find to block the device connected. I tried to constantly reboot the router to knock it off but it only slightly stutters and goes back on when  it reconnects. \n\nI don't want to change the name or password since my brother games late at night or my other brother watches movies. Having to explain to them about changing passwords as I'm a non confrontational person. \n\nFinally, I figured out that every device is unique. Not by the ip address but by something called the Mac address. I learned from my old jobs IT guy how he could only let people connect to the wifi unless he did something to let them through. \n\nApparently it's called access panel on my net gear router. So what I did was enable it, figure out my brothers devices and let them through, and tested to see what that fucking tv's MAC address is. Found out what it is and didn't let it through and he's still passed out sleeping. \n\nNow I can sleep in peace and quiet.", "summary": "Mom's boyfriend drinks, passes out and leaves his music blasting through the night. I set up the Internet to block out the device making the shitty music to sleep in peace."}
{"id": "t3_p9ilv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Falling Out of Love", "post": "Hello reddit,\nMy question is this: is falling out of love the definite sign that a relationship has run its course, or can love be rekindled again? \nMy girlfriend of 2 years has recently told me that although she loves me and cares for me, she has been falling out of love for the past 3 months. The 'spark' has just gone away for her. We are taking time away from eachother right now to sort out what we want to do. She says she wants to try and make it work, and she would really love for it to work and she wants to feel that way about me again. I am just not sure if it would be wise for me to agree because I don't want to be hurt more in case it doesn't work. We have always had a very mature and trusting relationship and we have a good ability to work through our problems. But I'm not sure physical attraction is something you can willingly bring back. \nSo can the 'spark' in a loving, caring, trusting relationship be rekindled? Is this just a new phase in the relationship? Or are we just prolonging the inevitable?", "summary": "Hurting and looking for your opinions reddit. Can the spark in a relationship be rekindled with effort or should it be left for what it was?"}
{"id": "t3_109ty7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19M] found this in my girlfriend's [19F] book. Can you help me decipher it and should I risk talking to her about it? We've been together only 2 months.", "post": "I found [this] in my girlfriend's notebook while looking up a wifi password. I'm 99% sure it's a list of sexual partners but I'm not so sure about the blank names or what the arrow means. \n\nJust to clarify, she does not know I saw this and I'm not even considering breaking up with her because of it. The reason I'm concerned is because she has told me that she has only done anything at all sexual with 3 guys before me, and I feel like I was lied to. Her history doesn't bother me too much but this list does seem to a bit extensive for our age. \n\nSo what do you think reddit? Should this affect out relationship? And just out of curiosity, can you tell me what it all means? I think I have a pretty good idea.", "summary": "I feel my gf lied to me about her sexual history, and now I'm curious about how many guys she's actually been with."}
{"id": "t3_pi2x9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So, Reddit, I ran into a problem while purchasing a foreclosed home...  Any advice is appreciated...", "post": "Here's the story:\nIn December 2011, my wife and I made an offer on a home, which was eventually accepted.  The home was a foreclosed property, owned by Aurora Mortgage Services.  Closing date, dictated by the seller, was to be February 10th, 2012 (tomorrow).  We fulfilled our end of agreement - provided earnest money deposit, secured financing, obtained insurance, and as far as we were concerned were ready for closing.  As a matter of fact, title agency (again, dictated by the seller) contacted us and scheduled the time for the actual close.  However, on Tuesday, February 7th, we were notified that Aurora has placed all of their assets on hold \"until further notice\", but that periodically, properties will be \"released from hold\" - whatever that might mean.  \nI've done some research online and came up with [this blog]  It appears that we are not the only ones currently dealing with this.\nSo now, our options are to file for an extension, or get our earnest money back and walk.  By choosing the later option, we loose out on the inspection money, appraisal and cost of gas that had to be turned on for the said two things (all together around $1,000).  We don't necessarily want to walk, because we like the house, but our current lease is set to expire next month.  We have no indication that this will be resolved by that point.\nHas anyone ever experienced this while dealing with foreclosures?  Has anyone ever dealt with Aurora?", "summary": "Purchasing a foreclosed home from Aurora Mortgage Services; days before closing they placed the property \"on hold\" - indefinitely.  What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_1cyq9q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Your thoughts on friendship post-break up? [26M/F]", "post": "After giving it another final attempt, my... ex-girlfriend and I decided last week to end our relationship after two years of being together. The love just wasn't there anymore, and it had turned into a fantastic friendship instead - but we both wanted more than just that. Nonetheless, she's the best friend I've ever had and I still love her dearly. She'll forever mean the world to me.\n\nOur break-up was tough, but it had to be done. I guess I even felt relieved when it was finally over, although when it finally truly dawned on me later that day I couldn't help but cry my heart out. The thing is, during our final conversation she asked me if I still wanted to remain friends, but I immediately declined. It's just not something I could handle. It would just hurt me too much. Plus a whole lot of other problems that usually arise, so yeah.\n\nNow, it's been little over a week and I guess I feel a whole lot better since then. It's just that... I've been rethinking my decision a lot. I truly miss her as a friend and I just want to talk to her again, but deep inside I also feel that I'm secretly hoping I could win her over again and not be lonely anymore and all that. I'm starting to think about all the good things of our relationship and somewhat ignoring the bad, and well, I guess I'm doing a lot of rationalizing at this point. \n\nThe bottom line however, is that I miss her (non-romantic) company and I'd like her back into my life as someone to talk to and laugh with. I think. \n\nDamnit, I just don't know anymore. On one hand I feel responsible and alpha for going cold-turkey on her, but on the other I feel I'm being dramatic about it and that I should just embrace the strong friendship that we had in the first place. \n\nAny advice or personal experiences are welcome, I guess.", "summary": "gf and I broke up amicably. Didn't want to remain friends, but having second thoughts about that now. wat do"}
{"id": "t3_1kdndg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the best e-mail service to use, in the light of the lavabit closure?", "post": "Want to start a new e-mail account, since my only current ones are with gmail. And, I've heard google is one of the more willing companies to give up your information. Also, I've heard that it's probably in my best interest, as an American, to distance myself with any type of US email company (for security purposes). Was just wondering what the best/most secure email service would be, outside the us or not?\n\nThanks ahead of time for any that answer this question honestly. As someone who has been trying to keep up with the NSA, well mainly just anything involving my right to privacy and freedom of speech, I just want to find something that I can use without the notion of a folder being made of everything I send. At the same time, I want to give my family/friends whichever you all decide is the best email provider to use, so I can protect them too. Because, (not sure if you all know this) anyone I know who isn't on Reddit or actively keeps up with current events has no clue who Snowden or Manning are, and what the NSA is.", "summary": "Best E-mail service for privacy/security? Redditors seem to be the only people who know what really is going on with NSA and the like."}
{"id": "t3_3sosj0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22 M] life-long friends [20s M] constantly make fun of me", "post": "I'm in my early 20s and live in the southern United States. I've had the same friends for forever and have had lots of great experiences with them in the past. In the last 2-3 years though they've become increasingly negative towards me.\n\nI'll often see a few of them individually and things will be fine, but in a group setting I'm often excluded, the only one chided, etc. Some of the things they say go out of bounds or they're things that apply to more than just me but I'm the only one who gets shit on for it. \n\nIn the past I've said things, but I'm told I'm just too sensitive or they're joking. When I decide not to participate when everyone is chatting online or in-person, they'll use that as an excuse to exclude me. When I make fun of someone, I'm either ignored or basically told to shut it. \n\nI'm not sure what to do. It's become increasingly stressful and these are my only 'friends'. Other people I know don't have friends like mine. We still have good times, but I feel like everything I do I'm being judged.", "summary": "Friends constantly make fun of me no matter what. Speaking up hasn't helped in the past. Still some good times, but not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1uiy83", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M16] have a huge crush on this girl [F16] but am to afraid to ask her out because of my weight.", "post": "Ok so this girl has been my friend for 3 years, and I never really had a crush on her until now. She is a grade behind me and I rarely got to see her after the year we met but we texted nearly every day since then.  We briefly saw each other my sophomore year and we had a lot of fun that week but she moved away for family reasons. \n\n  During sophomore year I went through a break up with the first person I fell in love with (I say love because I had never experienced the feelings I had for her before or since), and well I found solace in food and really let myself go and I began eating a lot and the habit stuck for a while.  It has been a year and I have recently acknowledged my problem and have made the effort to lose weight. I'm losing weight through diet and exercise and its coming off but slowly. At the moment I am 5'11 and weigh 215 lbs. \n\n  Now, I developed a crush for this girl after going through another problem with the aforementioned \"first love\".  I vented out my my problem to my friend and we talked stuff through. Something happened after that, our conversations changed and we began texting more often.  I don't know why but I began to like her more and more every day and realized how perfect for me she was. \n\n  This was all good and she recently told me she is moving back here. The last time she saw me I was smaller both in height and weight, but the fact that i'm fat now concerns me.  I want to further our relationship but I am very self conscious about my weight and I am too scared to make a move. My question is what do I do?", "summary": "I want to make a move on my crush but I am too scared because I am self conscious about me being overweight."}
{"id": "t3_546wl4", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[26f] Question for guys", "post": "When I was 18 there was a group of guy friends I hung out with a lot, mostly for video games.\n\nIn this group were 4 guys who were childhood friends, one of whom I was really physically attracted to. I never had a chance cause I wasn't his type. One of the other 4 seemed to really like me over the years. Initially I didn't want to date him since I had a thing for his friend and that seemed weird. When I was 18 I finally tried to give him a chance and found I really liked him.\nWe hung out alone a few times and there was one moment I remember feeling really connected to this guy, but we didn't really formally date. I found out later I was the only one who didn't seem to think we were officially 'dating'.\nI knew I wasn't in a position where I wanted a serious relationship, I was young and had things I wanted to try before settling down and he meant something to me in the settling down way so I dated someone else.\n\nThis really hurt him and he told me not to speak to him again after that.\n\nFast forwarding to 2016, I accepted a marriage proposal from a guy who is basically perfect. Handsome, great job and future, makes me laugh and smile and I know I will have a very happy future with him.\n\nThe guy from when I was 18 hasn't spoken to me since, and vice versa, though he has for whatever reason been on my mind since. I wouldn't say I love him, I don't think I could logically speaking, but there is some feeling that I need to do something about before I can feel I can get married.\n\nHe is in a relationship as far as I know, though I don't know how serious it is.\n\nMy question for guys is how weird would it be for me to try and really contact him again?\nThis seems to be really bothering me and regardless of what I have done the feeling won't shake. I would feel uncomfortable getting married to my fiancee without having this resolved in some way.", "summary": "guy I really liked when I was 18 told me not to speak to him after I didn't date him but now I am getting married at 26 and still have some kind of feelings."}
{"id": "t3_288i9y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Relationships: Should I [16 F] try to keep the friendship with my crush [17 M]?", "post": "So I met my friend just last year during summer school. It was a blast and I had no feelings whatsoever while some of our friends thought he did for me. I denied it profusely, even though none of us had a clue.\n\nThen summer school was over and absence made my heart grow fonder. We hung out a few times over the course of months, but I was usually busy with school work. The thing is, after each time we hung out, the crush feeling was replaced with what I can describe as relief mix with happiness.\n\nAlso throughout the months, I tried get rid of the crush feeling, as I know it would only complicate things further far more than I want. But for some reason, the feeling stuck along with thinking I could just tell him everything, all my thoughts and feelings. I just didn't know how to execute this.\n\nIn February, I overheard (because I earvesdropped like the little bitch I am) that he has a girlfriend. Now, I don't hate this girl in the slightest. I knew her before I knew of his existence and she has done nothing wrong to me. She's really nice actually. But holy shit, my heart was crushed and I felt like crying at that moment. Again, I tried to let go of the crush feeling since it's really useless. And again, it stayed.\n\nNow, it's been about 2 months since I talked to him. I do see him because we both have summer school for different reasons and we haven't even muttered a word, let alone a hello. Yet, I really do miss him and I would gladly be just his friend. I would rather have him as a friend than nothing at all. Although, I do have his number, but I can't bring myself to text him. I think I bother him even though he said before I would never bother him.\n\nShould I close the door or try to be friends?", "summary": "My friend/crush and I haven't talked for 2 month. I still want to be friends for all it's worth, but the relationship seems nonexistent."}
{"id": "t3_1jhdm5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[29M] Worried that I may never be about to be monogamous", "post": "After a good amount of relationships and dating I am starting to notice a trend with myself. After a while I find it hard to keep focused or interested in one girl and start looking for something \"new and exciting\". Part of it I think is I really enjoy meeting new people, learning about their lives and then experiencing new things with them. So after dating someone or being in a relationship for a while I often feel the need or just gravitate toward someone else who sparks my interest even if I know its not a long term deal. From there if anything I get fulfillment out of learning and talking to them about their views, life etc. Also the enjoyment of their different hobbies, likes or experiences we do together.\n---\nIdeally I know I one day want a family and kids, but I am not sure how I can stay in a long term relationship with this mindset and feeling. I know maybe I haven't found \"the one\" or been in true love, but I often wonder if I had the one, or am capable of just wanting to be with one person.", "summary": "I find it hard for a single girl to capture my attention for long periods of time and then start looking for something new. But I know I dont want to be single forever."}
{"id": "t3_1yh1rw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] about my coworker [20F], need tips how to start talking", "post": "Me and this one girl have been working at the same place for awhile now, I'm just having trouble with figuring out a way to start talking with her without coming off as creepy. I work at this place full time where as she works just on weekends, since she attends college during the week. It's a retail job, so weekends are very busy.\n\nI am able to talk to her in short amounts of time during the days she actually does work, but don't feel that it really amounts to much more than just chit chat. It's almost always a customer needing to be helped or me being needed somewhere else as to why we never get more than a few minutes to chat.\n\nOver the times that we have talked, she seems to be a very sweet and energetic person, someone I'd like to get to know more. I feel that just outright asking for her number is weird since we talk for only a few minutes a day if she does work. I'd like to be able to talk to her more and get to know more about who she is. After that, eventually see if she's got some interest in me, and then go from there.\n\nWould it be weird of me to ask for her number in a situation like this (in one of these brief encounters)? If so, what are some ways that I could get her number without coming off as creepy? This is my biggest issue. I don't really have a problem with talking to someone and getting to know them, but the fact that I don't really get much of a chance to interact with her makes this situation seem like it could come off in the wrong way.", "summary": "Brief time of being able to talk to girl at work since she doesn't work too often. Not sure how to get number without coming off as creepy. Tips?"}
{"id": "t3_f726c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit, New apartment, creepy neighbor is filming me! Advice?", "post": "I just moved into a new apartment, it's in an older house and the rental agency isn't the most professional. Upon moving in I noticed a man (aprox late 50's in age, heavy eastern european accent) who lives in one of the apartments above me walking around the premises with a small video camera. \n\nThis creeped me out so I sent an e-mail to my landlord who's response was simply, \"Oh that's so and so, he loves his camera but he's mostly harmless\". Ok, so I ignore him. As my weeks have been going buy i've seen him several other times, but i've noticed he only pulls his camera out when he sees me or other tenants and never by himself. Today I asked him very politely if he could stop filming me, and his answer was rushed and loud \n\n\"It is not illegal in this country, you people need to wake up, wake up. This is not illegal\" \n\nI tried to reason and explain that I wasn't trying to stop him from filming but only that I just did not wish to be a part of it. He kept repeating himself as he walked backwards up the stairs to his entrance. I live in Ontario Canada, and as far as I know it is completely legal to film people in public. I don't want to lock this guy up or anything I just don't want to be a part of his movie collection.\n\nAnyways Reddit, if someone could help me out with a little advice on how to approach this situation I would appreciate it.", "summary": "Creepy old dude filming people around my apartment complex, asked nicely for him to stop, he yells at me about his rights."}
{"id": "t3_2t97ob", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Make me print a 30 page syllabus? No tech help for you!", "post": "My first day back at school for the semester. Teachers normally provides us with a syllabus explaining the class and it's expectations. Every teacher I've ever had provided us with a paper copy of the syllabus no matter how long or complex it was. This teacher does not. She explains to us that if her syllabus isn't printed out by the next class, she will deduct 50 points from our final grade at the end of the semester. Very mature. Now keep in mind this syllabus is 30 pages long. 15 pages front and back. That's a lot of paper and toner for me. I have a Brother laserjet with duplex capabilities. It's the best printer ever.\n\nNormally when teachers have tech issues, I would normally offer my help since I'm very familiar with classroom technology. This teacher is trying to figure out how to plug the HDMI cable into her Macbook to show us a presentation. Macbooks do not have HDMI ports. And she doesn't have the adapter. This will be fun to watch. She grabs the VGA cable. Nope. No VGA port on her Macbook and she doesn't have the adapter for it either. She plugs in the 3.5mm audio cable into her computer expecting to see video on the projector. The students are no help. They're attempting to turn off the projector and back on and one student even offered his Macbook to see if that'll work. Needless to say, it didn't.\n\nInside, i was laughing so hard that my gut hurt. Outside, I remained perfectly calm.", "summary": "Too lazy to make us copies of the syllabus? I'm not helping you with your computer. But that's just me."}
{"id": "t3_rqrxb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Am I wrong for not wanting to go to a child's funeral?", "post": "I will say a few things first. I was very close to this little boy,  although we were not related (my mom and I would babysit him since he was 1). My mom and I were very close to the little boy because his mother had passed away, and we like to think we served as mother figures to him. His dad is an asshole. Without going into too much detail, he is a drunk and is known for starting conflicts with people. I strongly dislike him with a passion. There is also a lot of drama surrounding the death of the child, and I don't want to be a part of it. Also, looking at him in the casket would be too painful for me. I don't wanna remember him in a box. I'd rather keep all the happy memories we shared.  I am currently away at college, and going home for the funeral would consist of me missing 5 days of school. I'm so confused, my mom really wants me to go, but I don't want to.", "summary": "Little boy that I was close to passed away. Mom wants me to go to funeral, but I hate the kid's dad, there's a lot of drama, and I can't afford to miss school."}
{"id": "t3_2nb1ya", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Opportunity of a lifetime (for a young cat enthusiast)", "post": "Currently I am out of a job for about a month after 3 long years working for a major retail company. I am planning to stay far away from retail at least for now and am finally ready to hunker down and apply. Yay!\n\nI live north of Portland, OR where the most beautiful establishment i could possibly think of is about to become a reality.\nPurrington's Cat Lounge.\n\nThis place is literally perfect for me, with a cafe' that sells beer and wine, yummy foods, and has a lounge to be filled with CATS. \n\nThe application process is extremely easy, just an emailed resume and attached cover letter. I am pretty comfortable with my resume, but I've got a few questions on how to make my cover letter perfect.\n\nFirst, I think everyone knows Portland is a little eccentric and maybe not so run of the mill. Opening up a Cat Cafe, well you get it.\n\nMy resume is extremely professional so I wondering if I could get away with a very passionate cat crazed letter?\nI don't want the letter to be overly \"young\"? \nIve got tons of customer service background, and even cafe' background. But I'm just wondering how far i should take this. For instance, i have 3 cat tattoos (that still could be hidden if needed), 4 cats at home and never ending love for all things Meow.\n\nMaybe i'm just trying to ask, what would you do if something perfect for you came up and you dont want to blow it?", "summary": "Cat Cafe is possibly perfect job for me, how far do i go in writing this cover letter to show my enthusiasm while not be a laughable candidate"}
{"id": "t3_22n0cu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24/F] am getting so annoyed by my coworker [40s?/M]", "post": "I am the receptionist at work, and I have a coworker who will just not shut up sometimes. I am not a big gossiper, nor do I like to spend a lot of time being negative. There IS such a thing as someone who complains way too much. Also, he is one of those people who do not heed any advice you give out. I think he just likes to hear himself talk. \n\nIt's annoying because I feel like I'm trapped at my desk, stuck in (a one-sided) conversation with him, and I feel like he knows it. I feel like I can't get any work done. I was almost done with one of my tasks, and he just starts babbling about this, that, and the other. I've tried putting an earbud in to listen to music (I can't put both in because I have to answer the phones/it looks unprofessional). BUT HE STILL TRIES TO TALK OVER IT. He'll even try to fucking talk to me while I'm clearly on the phone. It's not even important work things. It's just him wanting to complain about something again, or talk about how super drunk he got the night before, or about how his wife eats seaweed wraps all the time and it grosses him out. I've tried just getting up and leaving my desk to go organize random stuff around the office, but again, small company, he'll just run into me in a few minutes and ask me what I'm doing. This happens about 3-4 times a day of him just standing in the lobby and talking at me. I can't outright tell him to leave me alone or to shut up because we work at a tiny company of about 50 people. I hate the way he talks, and it's really getting on my nerves. \n\nOkay this is mostly a rant, but seriously, is there any polite, straightforward way of telling him to fuck off and let me do my work in peace and quiet?!", "summary": "Coworker loves to gossip/chit-chat way too much. Distracting from work, driving me crazy. Need help finding ways to tell him he's being a douchebag and to leave me alone."}
{"id": "t3_3tw9oo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I am a [17 M] with a [17 F] girlfriend of several months and a random girl approached me requesting social media contact information.", "post": "Just to clarify this isn't a huge deal or anything. I just want to make sure I get another parties thoughts on the situation. So I was at a coffee shop for the majority of the day working on paperwork and whatnot to the point of closing time nearing. I notice a few very attractive girls (assuming they're all friends) walk in and order their coffee, yada yada. As I continue my work I notice them glance at me a few times casually, no biggy. About an hour passes and they begin to leave. One of them runs back over to where I'm sitting and asks me if I have an Instagram while rambling that she'll get some money from her friends if she gets my info. Trying to be nice and help her win the bet/dare/whatever I enter it in and she scurries off seemingly happy. I then realize that she (or one of her friends) may have found me attractive and I technically gave my contact info to her... Within the next couple of minutes she and her friends all followed me (on social media, no stalked haha) and the one who asked liked all my photos. I am very fond of my girlfriend and our relationship as a whole. I just feel strange and somewhat flattered by this random attractive girl approaching me. Regardless, I would never pursue such a thing given my current happy status in life. My question is, how should I respond to the Instagram stuff? As in, should I A) Ignore it and move on B) Follow them back to be nice and chill, no biggy C) Message the girl stating my current relationship and how I do not wish to pursue anything nicely D) Block her and pretend like it never happened. Thanks", "summary": "Attractive girl showed slight interest through real life request to social media info. I'm currently in a happy relationship and do not wish to pursue."}
{"id": "t3_20rhd6", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "x/posted How should I tell my daughter that I am not her biological dad?", "post": "I am trying to plan for when and how I should tell my daughter that she is not biologically mine.She is only 10 months so I have plenty of time. \n\nBackground: when my wife and I were beginning to try for our second, she got pregnant by my friend at the time. I'm cool with that part, we have an unorthodox relationship. He freaked and wanted nothing to do with the situation and bailed after he found out abortion wasn't going to happen. She has been my daughter the whole time, I am legally her father, and I will always be her dad. \n\nI want to be completely honest with her in the future if she wants to know about her bio dad, and will be completely supportive if she wants to track him down (we have saved information for her). My only worry is that I do not want her to feel bad that she is not biologically mine, or that someone would not want to be a part of her life.", "summary": "I'm her dad. Bio dad is a piece of shit. I don't want her to feel bad, but I want to be honest with her."}
{"id": "t3_nsfr7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Dear Reddit, any idea what may be my issue?", "post": "My ex boyfriend, whom I am almost sure I fell in love with, and I, broke up almost 7 months ago. \nI rarely have any thoughts about me and him still being together or still wishing that we were together. I just don't think about him that often anymore, but sometimes I still do. \nBut, when I'm around him or see things update by him or his family members on facebook, I still feel like I've received a punch in the gut. Yet, when we're hanging out in a group, it's a bit awkward, but I'm not completely uncomfortable, and seeing him talk to other girls in person and what-not, does not bother me so much as I would think it would. \n\nSo, my issue is: I've had a few men that have taken an interest in me and I consider them, but when we exchange phone numbers or facebook names..  I just have no desire to pursue any further. Maybe become friends with them, sure, but romantically there's just no desire there. At first, I'll think maybe their nice looking and think there is potential there, but it's almost like as soon as we share a phone call or a texting conversation I rule them out as anything more than a friend, and it's almost like I start finding them unattractive. \nCould I possibly still not be over my ex enough to take an interest in dating again.. which speaking of dating, I'm the type of girl that would rather date my friend or best friend than go straight onto the path of potential dating with a guy I hardly know.\nSo, do any of you possibly see what the issue might be that I may be missing? I would think that 7 months would be enough time to get over someone enough that you would be able to appreciate others in a romantic-sense and be able to put yourself out there again.\n\nHelp?", "summary": "My ex and I broke up around 7 months ago and I'm having issues with taking any romantic interest with any guy that at first, seems to be perfect, but then I change my mind. always. :/"}
{"id": "t3_ozlc8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "AskReddit: What does it take to break into the music industry as an A&R representative?", "post": "Apologize for the throw away account. \n\nMy friend is interested in in making his way into the mainstream music industry as an A&R representative. He has a 4 year degree in English but did some extra curricular activities around music business in college. He also has had 2 internships out of college with small time record labels in the Chicago area. He has been trying for a few years now with no success. He lives in Chicago but has moved to LA for a year. He returned recently to Chicago. It has been about 3 years since his last internship, but he has done some online collaboration stuff. Still far and few in between. \n\nMy question is what path have any of you taken to make your way into the record industry? Is networking the only important thing? Is there a set of skills that are specifically looked for?", "summary": "Any tips or plans of attack on how to go about getting a job in the music industry as an A&R representative? Any specific skills they look for?"}
{"id": "t3_3g35uc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[26 M] with [22 F] in online friendship, F is lesbian, M likes F, stay or leave ?", "post": "First time posting in reddit, so I am not sure I am asking it right. But I am not sure how or where to ask it. Curiosity and doubt are burning like hot potatoes in my pocket and I implore reddit to give some insights on this.\n\nI met a lesbian, or so as she says online a few months back.  We met through a game and we chat everyday. We are both Chinese Asians.\n\nShe is rather antisocial and spends most of her time playing games after college. After graduating, she sent me a photo of herself. This is when it gets a bit wrong. She is pretty and I started to have feelings for her and asked her a few times. Naturally she rejected me and still agrees to stay as friends. She joked a few times saying if I was female she won't hesitate to like me though and begin a relationship. As of now, she says it is fine whether I am there or not, she just wants someone to chat to.\n\nNow I am wondering, should I still be friends with her to support her views ? Should I accept how it is and continue to be friends with her, hoping one day I can meet her and let her loosen up her views on the opposite sex, or should I just bolt like a coward and find someone else ? \n\nThank you for reading my drivel.", "summary": "OP likes a girl online, girl is lesbian but doesn't dislike OP, should OP stay to as friends or find someone else ?"}
{"id": "t3_3f5dfx", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "White 'murican ignorance: Getting a job while illegal?", "post": "The wife of my co-worker just quit due to our job having pretty arbitrarily enforced rules (it can be maddening), and I recommended to her husband another place that she would likely enjoy more where a friend of mine works. \n\nHis english is good not great and I speak practically none of his native tongue, so our communication took some effort, but here's what I got.\n\nHe asked me to pick him up and drive him to this place (ive never been) so he can fill out an application (he wants to work with his wife so he'd get the job first and then she would join maybe?) and then he told me that he was illegal, had social security and green card (showed them to me even) but said they were expired, and implied that his wife was less legal than that.\n\nSo, it seems weird that he wants me to take him there; was there a communication failure that he thinks I have some power at this place to get him past the hiring check or that I know it well? If so, how do I clarify that I only heard about the job and that they might still be hiring. Or is he maybe hoping that I'll use my id to get his wife hired (i won't). So strangers, may I please have some information on how i can help a relative stranger with information and not a ride in my car?...meta...", "summary": "What's getting a job like for those with expired green cards? Do you need a citizen to 'vouch' for you? What if you don't have anything, is it just either hope nobody checks or steal an identity?"}
{"id": "t3_36r9z0", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Texas: Is no lawyer follow-up normal?", "post": "I recently discovered I have a warrant. I called my lawyer on Monday 5/18 and was told that they were going to contact the warrants division to find out what kind of warrant and what needs to be done for me to clear it. \n\nIt's now Thursday and I haven't heard a word from them. I'm all for giving people the time to do their job with little unnecessary interference on my part, so before I start pestering them, I'm wondering if not hearing back is normal? \n\nBackground:\nI was arrested for possession of 1/8 grams of marijuana last July. I was fingerprinted, booked, and released all within 30 minutes. No mention of bail was ever made at that time. I retained this lawyer immediately following my arrest ($1500 which I paid immediately) and was told they couldn't do anything until a court date or warrant was issued. I was told by the cops that I would receive a notice in the mail with a court date. It never came, and my name (still) does not show up in any state/county warrant search websites. I called the warrants division every two weeks for about three months and my name was never found. I stopped calling after that. \n\nThe ONLY reason I know that I have a warrant is because I have a friend on the police force. I have a good job and recently discovered that in order to have access to a certain software application, I have to go through a criminal history check. I asked my police friend to look up my name and sure enough, he found that I have a warrant, which led me to contact my lawyer on 5/18, haven't heard back, which led me to this question. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I just want to get this overwith already.", "summary": "lawyer told me they'd call me back after they find out details of my warrant, it's been 2 days with no word, need to know if this is normal before I start being persistent."}
{"id": "t3_2ugjpl", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How can my LDR boyfriend (31/M) and I (24/F) build trust after it's been broken??", "post": "Basically...my boyfriend cheated, in my eyes. He got emotionally involved with an ex and I caught him. He was aware I was sensitive about this ex and he disregarded my emotions and continued talking to her in a sexual manner. He has said sorry and promised to stop contacting her and I think he has, to an extent. But he has moved away since for a new job opportunity and wants me to move with him when I'm done with school. Meanwhile I'm constantly worried he is being unfaithful....one of the conditions we made when resolving the lying with his ex was that he would be completely transparent and open with me about things. I thought over communication would help with our long distance and trust issues and he agreed. He promised he would talk to me about where he was and who he's with just so we can build trust and to include me in his day to day life.\n\nBut he's not been as open as he said he would be. He withholds names (I think he thinks I'll freak if he's with a woman) but the fact that he's hiding things is what's bothering me. I just don't know how to stop jumping to conclusions after what happened between us.", "summary": "my boyfriend disrespected our relationship by covering up sexual text messages with an ex. We stayed together but I don't trust him especially now that we're long distance. How do we build trust?"}
{"id": "t3_4svbt7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [24m] of 5 years wants to join the army, and wants me [265f] to stay with him", "post": "Hello!\n\nMy boyfriend  [24m] of 5 years revealed the news to me [25 f] that he is enlisting in the army. I'm a whirlwind of emotions, and I'm unsure how to react. I graduated college a year ago, and he graduated this last spring. He had spoken of the possibility of enlisting after school, but I didn't think anything would come of it. Now he's enlisting next month! We've spoken about marriage, having kids, and moving to another area. This changes everything. I'm scared I won't be able to handle not seeing him for months at a time, since we have been living together for nearly 4 years. \n\nI love my boyfriend, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him, but I'm not sure what to do. His enlistment is 4 years. I just can't imagine uprooting my own life, leaving a well paying job I love, and leaving family. I would also want to wait to have a family because I wouldn't want our kids to deal with not seeing their father, but what happens when he reenlists and becomes a career military man? \n\nIf we break up it will be unbelievable hard. I've planned already to spend the rest of my life with him. If we stay together my fear is that something will tear us apart. I don't want to be another failed military marriage. \n\nPlease help, I'm so desperate for advice!", "summary": "my boyfriend [24m] of 5 years is enlisting in the army and I  [25f] have no idea what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2riflz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30F] want to get to meet my half brothers one day [14M and 6M] but their parents most likely won't allow it to happen", "post": "My dad divorced my mum when I was 12. I stayed with him every weekend until he met his current wife when I was 15 and then stopped because she said it was painful for her to see me due to her previous miscarriages.\n\nWithout saying a word, he stopped seeing me and moved away and got married. He also reversed he vasectomy and had two sons, now 14 and 6 years old. \n\nI still visit my nan on my dad's side and she believes the estrangement is all his wife's doing (and obviously his fault too). She told me my eldest brother knows I exist and *might* be interested in meeting me one day. I look at all their Facebook pages regularly, so I know what they look like. I'm just conscious that I'm likely nothing more than a strange 30 year old woman to him right now.\n\nMy nan is now 81 years old and my only connection to them. I've considered contacting my eldest brother, but I realise it'd be a bit much to handle when he's under 18. Also, his mum will likely do anything she can to sabotage any relationship I hope to have with them.\n\nWhat do I do?", "summary": "Want to meet my brothers for the first time, but my dad and his wife don't want me in their lives, most likely."}
{"id": "t3_1l49ao", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [21/m] need some advice on how to deal with other guys crushing on my GF (22/f)", "post": "My Girlfriend has guy friends (like most normal women) and i know a couple of them like her and this weekend one of them (he is in a ton of her major classes) Drunk texted her professing his feelings. She doesnt think its a big deal but im Having a super hard time Not Giving a Fuck about this. I just need some help figuring out how to deal with my side of the problem. i think its just the thought of some skeezy dudes i dont really know trying to eventually take what i have from me. she assures me that its not anything to worry about but im a guy and i know how our brains work and i realize that you can home wreck a relationship really freaking easy and that scares the crap out of me. \nAdvice would be awesome. Thanks", "summary": "Girlfriend's guy friend has drunkenly professed feelings for her. I would like to know how to handle it better."}
{"id": "t3_1z5kcv", "subreddit": "college", "title": "At a cross-road in my life.", "post": "So this decision can make my life go one of two ways.\n\nI applied to a 4-year college (SUNY Cortland) and got in. I'll be transferring in as a Junior from my local community college. I just got the letter today and I wasn't expecting to get in. I'm pumped.\n\nI also have a local 4-year college that I applied to but did not get in. But here's the kicker. My cousin's fiance works there and is friends with a lot of people in admissions. She said that if I do well this semester, take a class or two in both summer sessions at my community college, I have a very good chance of getting in.\n\nDoing the latter means I can stay local, take next semester off (since Fall grades won't count towards a spring transfer and I already have 70 credits, the max you can transfer, not counting this semester) and work pretty much full time for that time.\n\nDoing the former allows me to get the experience of dorm life, responsibility, and freedom. \n\nI don't know what to do. Although the more I look at it, the more I'm leaning towards going away. Y'know, since it's already guaranteed I'm in and I don't have to worry about taking summer classes and the possibility of not getting in to the local 4-year...", "summary": "Got into 4-year college, will transfer in as Junior. Also debating on going to local 4-year, but will require more work and a semester off - not guaranteed to get in to local 4-year."}
{"id": "t3_2tdtx2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23M] and my friend [20F] decided that we wanted to get married today.", "post": "My friend and I decided that we wanted to get married... however, this isn't a typical marriage.\n\nBeing that I'm gay and want kids and she, after having a rough childhood, is wanting stability, we came to realize that we could help each other out. What we're looking at doing is entering a temporary, 5 year marriage in our home state of Wisconsin where the conditions would be that we have a few children (she is wanting them too) and I'd help her get through college. Being that I'm graduating this spring, I'd be bringing in most of the income at first and I'm alright with that.\n\nAnyways, we'd be signing a prenuptial contract that would declare that the marriage would only last five years. Now as to whether or not this is legal- I do not know. However, the deal would be that after 5 years, we would have the option to go our own way so long as we were equally involved with the kids. We would keep our finances separate except for those finances related to housing and raising the kids and the marriage would be open.\n\nSo with all of this in mind, is there anyway for us to mentally prepare ourselves for this? Is this a good idea or a bad idea and what steps should we take in doing this? Finally, how would we explain this to our families and later on to our kids? And most importantly, could we end up scarring them for life doing this or would they likely be understanding?", "summary": "Friend and I are looking at an open, contractual marriage that would help us both out and are wondering what challenges we'd face and how we should deal with them."}
{"id": "t3_fllxr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Shy guys on reddit...unite! I like a guy who refuses to make a move on any woman. Help!!", "post": "Okay, so it's a little complicated so I'll try and keep it brief. I live with 4 guys in house and I have a major crush on one of them. When I first moved into the house, I had a boyfriend. After we broke up, my roommate *Drew* was the first person I told and he let me cry on him (he's a little OCD, and told me that I was the first person he ever let cry on him).\n\nAnyways, so time went on, and on Halloween, he took a picture with me and had both of his arms around me and came into my job and almost kissed me. He was also kind of tipsy though.\n\nSo then more time passes and we continued to bond. And it was one of the other roommate's 21st birthday party, so we all got really drunk and we were on the couch and I started to tickle him and we ended up cuddling in front of everyone for the rest of the night.\n\nBut then I felt like we were growing a little distant, so I started to put up a wall out of fear of getting hurt. When I confronted him about the void, he said that I was the one blocking him out, and that I put my headphones on before I even leave my room and I won't make eye contact with him, and that he likes it when I say hi to him. \n\nSo I'm getting really mixed feelings from him, and his friends said that he won't approach a woman-that they have to be aggressive with him. I'm afraid to make a move and him not feel the same way towards me. \n\nSo Reddit, does he like me? Should I make a move? And if so, what should I do? He's an OR major, not sure if that helps.", "summary": "I like my roommate, we've cuddled, but he likes aggresive women and probably wouldn't tell me if he liked me. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1swspa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] - feeling like I do not know how to be single", "post": "I got out of a long (3yr) relationship right at the start of September. It was semi-mutual (he initiated it, and I completely agreed - we both needed freedom/independence from each other), though I was still very sad about it and still in love with the guy. After a bit of grieving I was hooking up again, and doing a tiny bit of dating, and mostly just focusing on school/academia/my friends and was fairly happy and over my breakup. (In case it sounds a little too soon, the ex and I hadn't seen each other for a month prior to the breakup as I was on a paleontological dig, and had been apart for weeks at a time during the summer, so we had already kind of gotten used to each other's absence). \n\nFast-forward to now, I have a very cool FWB (22M) who I've been seeing for a few weeks after sharing the same group of friends for a few months. But I am feeling weird about the whole situation because despite the fact that I *do not want another relationship right now* I'm afraid I'm getting really clingy. I feel in some ways that I need him to validate me, and often worry I am not truly comfortable with being alone. I think I may be pushing feelings of loneliness onto my FWB, and get really sad if he doesn't respond to my texts, etc. despite the fact that I know don't want a boyfriend. \n\nI think sometimes it may be better for me if I just quit it with boys, because from September to November I was pretty content with just doing academic things and being with my friends. As soon as the FWB started my feelings of anxiety rose again (though coupled with all the fun and excitement of intimacy and sexuality).\n\nI don't know, reddit... what do you think would be a healthy way for me to deal with these feelings?", "summary": "I feel lonely and uncomfortable being alone, but know I don't want/need a boyfriend; also projecting lonely feelings onto FWB. How can I learn how to be happy while being single?"}
{"id": "t3_28tp75", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A guy [17M] offered to give me [17F] a ride on his motorbike to and from an event we're both attending", "post": "There is this guy whom I have known for maybe around a year now. We go to the same school so we used to see each other every day before the holidays began. I could say we are rather good friends as we can talk about almost everything. Now there's this event coming and both of us are attending it. We were chatting one day on Facebook and he said if I wanted he could pick me up that day and also bring me back home with his bike. I see it as a \"big\" thing as this guy is an introvert and quite shy around people. He's often awkward with girls save for me.\n\nIs this only a gesture of politeness or could this guy have some feelings towards me? In general he is a real gentleman and a very sweet guy. That made me think that he might have no special reason for offering a ride. However, I never complained or even mentioned how I would otherwise go to the event; he just came up with that suggestion all of a sudden. He has never asked anything me anything like this before nor have I seen or heard him giving a ride to anyone else ever before.\n\nWhat got me thinking was that getting a ride from someone is, after all, quite intimate, isn't it? Being so close to the driver and having to hold onto them and all. You don't usually see guys giving rides to girls unless there's something between them (okay, you do... but you know what I mean).\n\nAnyway, I want to hear your opinions about this. Do you think he could be developing feelings towards me, or is this an everyday thing for guys to do?\n\nIn case you want to know my reply, it was a yes. I have a weak spot for guys with motorbikes. :)", "summary": "Do you think this guy who's offering me a ride on his bike could have feelings towards me, or is it a normal thing for guys to do for girls?"}
{"id": "t3_nebcc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, would you date a Juggalette?", "post": "So, long story short. We met through mutual friends who are non-juggalos and we hit it off. She is actually very intelligent, is drop dead gorgeous, and just finished school to be a CNA. I'm conflicted because she is covered with stupid juggalo, dead lotus, and Kotton Mouth King tattoos, has her ears stretched and a ton of piercings. Not a lot but enough to make me hesitant, says whoop whoop a lot, and is coming off a pill addiction, doesn't want to cover or remove her jewelry to get a job either. She is trying to better herself as a person but still wants to stick to the family. Do you think it's possible to be a juggalette and not trash or if it's possible to unbrainwash her? lol", "summary": "Meet gorgeous and intelligent girl who happens to be a juggalette. Confused on what to do because she constantly puts herself back two steps with me when her juggalo side comes out."}
{"id": "t3_qbppn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Alcoholic Mom needs help but I do not live close", "post": "So here is the deal, my mom is an alcoholic, always has been.  Anyone who has dealt with one knows that it is an all the time thing; and that there are peaks and valleys, recoveries and relapses.  My mom got remarried around 5 or 6 years ago and I always thought the new guy was nice enough, but never really knew him very well.  Over the last 3 years or so she has become a shell of herself, and just sits around drinking and has been neglecting all human things.  She never showers or changes clothes and is wearing a jacket that is literally disintegrating on her body she has worn it so long.  I have tried talking to her about it to no avail (I currently live about 300 miles from them)  This past weekend she missed her first grandchild's (my daughter) first birthday, that I went through great trouble to have in her town so that she could be there.  She did not even try to get out for it.  Needless to say this upset me so I went over there the next day and basically had a single man intervention (not the first time something like this has gone down).  All the time growing up I was usually able to pull her out of one of these relapses but I have also never seen one go on this long.  Her husband (who constantly buys her beer and just lets this woman deteriorate in front of him) called me names, and said I was inconsiderate and that she is sick and doesn't want help.  I was unable to respond as he told me all of this in a text (chickenshit if you ask me) after I had left town.    I was absolutely in shock that he not only is not going to help, but acts like I am some kind of jerk for wanting her to take a shower, get off her couch, and participate in the human world.  So my question is this:  How do you help someone who lives 300 miles away and cohabitates with a person who is only going to feed her addiction?", "summary": "Mom is an alcoholic, been in a 3 year funk and husband just feeds her addiction and is offering no help.  I am too far to be the day to day presence she probably needs."}
{"id": "t3_2csg8w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "GF [24F] Does not believe in us anymore. Any hope on fixing it? [24M]", "post": "Hello! I'll keep it short.\n\nMe and my EX was togeather for 4 years and the past 6 months had been shit. Everything that could possible go wrong has pritty much happend. Broken up several times, argueing and so on. Pritty much alot of baggage in our relationship.\n\nHowever, we broke up again about 3 weeks ago and this time it's offical so to speak. She broke up with me and I didnt want us to break up. \n\nI've tried to talk to her and convince her that we had a good thing going and just had a ruffpatch(?). \n\nHowever, she keeps telling me she loves me (We even met once and had sex and she cried almost the whole time). But she does not \"believe\" in us anymore.. that things would change and we could have it great once again. \n\nI do believe that we can fix things because our main problem was always communication (We always \"fought\" through text and had serious talks through it also, so alot of missunderstanding etc)\n\nThe thing is even tho she says she does not believe in us anymore, does not want to be with me. She keeps giving me \"hints\" that she regreats it.", "summary": "GF and I broke up, she does not believe in a future anymore but I dont want to give up.. How can I \"convince\" her?"}
{"id": "t3_jp2r4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I get out of my seatbelt violation?", "post": "Reddit,\n\nI am currently attending summer school, living in an off campus small, college town. Yesterday I went to meet my sister and her friends at a nearby restaurant. Since it is only down the street I rode my skateboard and they drove from her house. We got our food and headed out. \n\nI jumped in the back of my sister friends car, having had a few drinks prior to this whole story, I wasn't thinking and didnt put on my seatbelt as the drive back to my sisters house where we planned to eat was 0.5 mi, 2 minutes by car. The car was a small coupe and with my skateboard at my feet I was somewhat squished already. We came to a stop sign and a pedestrian crossed the street behind the car.\n\nJust then Mr. Police Man comes around the corner and comes to a stop next to us, facing the opposite direction, waiting for the pedestrian to cross. I had been sitting on that side of the car and made eye contact with the police man and he pointed at me at which I realized I hadn't had my seatbelt on and tried to slyly put it on. He noticed that too.\n\nHe pulled us over and gave me a ticket and gave a ticket to my sisters friend, the driver who was cited for not making sure I had my seatbelt on. I am 19 and I am expected to pay for both tickets. As a poor college student I don't have the $175 each (350 total) that the tickets are expected to be. \n\nWhat can I do reddit?", "summary": "Got a ticket for not wearing seatbelt. 0.5 mi, 2 min drive. Expected to pay drivers ticket too. I don't have the money."}
{"id": "t3_yecl4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My girlfriend found out she has HPV...", "post": "Okay, Reddit, I've been dating this girl for a little over a week and she texts me today and tells me that she found out that she has HPV. She noticed a bump downstairs and got paranoid about it after looking it up online so she went to the doctor. So the doctor looked at it and told her that it was HPV and gave her some medicine and sent her on her way.  \nAt this point, that is about all I know. I don't know what to think, how to feel, if I should be mad or not, I just don't know. I'm a little freaked out to say the least.  \nI guess my question is what does this mean for me? Will I get warts on my manly bits? What does this mean basically? Am I going to get warts on my junk? Does this fuck me over for the rest of my life?  \nI'm too stunned to just look online because I'm sure it'll just make me freaked out as fuck (especially staying away from WebMD). Any information you guys have would be much appreciated.  \nYes, this is a throwaway account. Some of my friends know my real username. Don't care about karma.", "summary": "My gf found out she has HPV, I'm a little freaked out. Looking for information and anything to make me feel better."}
{"id": "t3_4cksko", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21 M) feel like my girlfriend (23 F) has become just a friend", "post": "Brief background: We've been together for over 2 years now and the past few months things have been a little rocky due to issues over privacy and snooping.\n\nAfter some recent issues that we've had, we managed to work thru them and everything has been fine since then. After everything I don't really feel the same deep connection with her that I once did. It's not that I don't find her attractive, but after everything I just feel distant.\n\nI'm not sure if it's because I don't feel like I can trust her anymore, or if I've just changed as a person and it's my fault. I'm not really sure if I should stick with it and hope to one day feel close again, or if I should walk away. \n\nAny advice or similar experiences would be appreciated.", "summary": "Living with my girlfriend feels more like a friend with benfits situation rather then romantic. Not sure what to do about it."}
{"id": "t3_43vxat", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] and my girlfriend [16 F] of close to six months of on and off, finally broke up. She says she doesn't love me anyone. I'd do anything to get her back. [Breakups]", "post": "As stated in the title, me [16/m] and my girlfriend [16/f] have been in a sort of on and off relationship for a bit under six months. She has broken it off a total of three times now. The first time, she said she was having problems and wouldn't really let me in on them. This lasted for about three weeks. \n\nWe proceeded to get back together and then she broke it off for a second time, stating that she thought she fixed her problems, but she hadn't. This lasted for about a week and then we got back together for about two weeks. \n\nJust a few days ago, she called me up after a date, stating that she didn't love me anymore and just wanted to be friends. We had both said \"I love you\" to each other and showed many signs of affection multiple times on that same date. I'm incredibly confused. I don't really get whats up and if there is any chance of saving this relationship I'd love to know how to.\n\nI understand that we are quite young, this one just feels way different than any relationship I have ever been in before. I'd prefer it stay in my life.", "summary": "Girlfriend and have had on and off problems,She broke it off for a bit a few times. She finally proclaimed that she didn't love me anymore. I want to get her back."}
{"id": "t3_2s5qma", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M/25][F/21][2.5 yrs] Got back with my husband (a.k.a. love of my life). Can't get over his sexual escapades. It's making me want to slit my wrists. I think I'm a psychopath. PLEASE help.", "post": "**Please be kind. This is my life.**\n\nI'll keep this short. My husband and I are and have always been in crazy love. Like, the kind of unhealthy love that Reddit is typically, hypocritically against. We're both extremely jealous about each other, to the point where it sort of drove me crazy. \n\nI divorced him early 2014 because I thought I'd be better off alone. I wasn't. I dated him on and off throughout the summer. He had an on and off thing with a girl for like 5 months. I had a few things. Nothing as serious as he did. Now we're back together and I absolutely cannot live without him. \n\nHe can't live without me either, but I can't stop being jealous. I'm irrationally jealous. Mostly because I know they did kinky things that he's into now. Ugh. I keep freaking out and trying to run away. It's driving us both crazy. I'm making this man who loves me so much so upset. \n\nWe keep having incidents where I get intrusive thoughts then I try to leave, then he takes my keys and cries his eyes out (He NEVER cries) and blocks the door, then I attempt to beat the shit out of him (my knuckles are bruised right now) because he won't give me my keys (He never hits back, but I never win because he's got 100 lbs on me), then he cries and tells me he can't let me leave his life again, then I cry and tell him I love him too much and I'm sorry, rinse and repeat. \n\n**So, how do I stop being crazy? How do I just enjoy this man without constantly comparing myself? How do I get these images out of my head?", "summary": "Divorced husband. He had a thing. Super fucking jealous of that thing. Now I'm abusive, apparently. I love him so much that I want to die. How do I stop being batshit crazy? "}
{"id": "t3_m0brz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She is in love with me but I am faking this relationship. Is this wrong?", "post": "I treat her better than any other gf I have had. We do all sorts of romantic stuff, go on hikes, have pikniks, cuddle after sex, when I wake up at her house I make her breakfast, clean shit up around her place, let her sleep in. We have been together for two years and broken up thrice. I have never cheated on her. She drunkenly kissed a guy once but she came to me crying the next day and kissing isn't that big of a deal for me. I listen to her problems and give her solid advice when she asks for it. I am very helpful with her family: doing yard work, cleaning, making dinner when nobody else wants to. And on top of all that I give her 3-5 hour long massages a month (I'm a massage therapist by trade). The only thing is I am faking this entire relationship. I've gotten very good at it. I know exactly what she wants and expects most of the time and am good at delivering. The reason I know I am not ever going to fully commit to this relationship is because she suffers from depression. I take into account that one week of every month is 'that' week and should be treated with caution, every other week she will suffer a major debilitating headache that will spiral her down into a pit of depression lasting at the very least 3 days most I've seen it go is a week. Conservatively that is 4 days every other week where shit goes down the toilet. That comes out to a MINIMUM of 13 days of the month where no matter what happens she will be in a bad mood. I know not to bother her when this happens and she knows not to expect me around. I love her but am not in love with her. I can not live with her and her depression. Is it wrong to fake this relationship for the sake of casual sex until something better comes my way?", "summary": "My gf of 2yrs loves me but I cannot stand her half the time and am faking this relationship until I have something better to do, advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3h9zon", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Gf [26f] mentioned last night that she doesn't feel that I'm attracted to her [26m] and claimed it 'was as good as over' after sex...", "post": "Registered to make this post, so hello I guess. \nA bit of context:\n-Long distance relationship (7 months, 1.5 hrs away from each other)\n-I live in the country she lives in in the city\n-She is currently stressed from having to move out and find a new place\n-We both share the same career and share many interests, which is the initial reason I fell for her\n-I've been burned by high-maintenance model-tier women before so I was looking for something a bit more homely, but she's not unattractive at all \n\nBasically after sex the other night I couldn't 'arrive', and she got really upset claiming that 'this has been happening for weeks now'. She's been getting orgasms where as I haven't, and she basically assumed that I was no longer attracted to her. She made all sorts of threats about breaking up, cheating while I was away etc and when I called her on her BS manipulation she started crying. \n\nI'm not the most emotionally accessible guy, I take a LONG time to climax even with very attractive women, I still like her a lot and she's extremely useful to me.\n\nNeed a female perspective more than anything", "summary": "can't orgasm with GF she thinks it's because I'm not attracted to her, that's not true, advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3nqfh3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [35/M] of almost 4 years consistently blows off affection from me [28/F].", "post": "We have been together for almost 4 years and a lot of the time I feel like we are just good friends who have sex. Any type of affection I give him is usually discounted as \"needy\" or \"clingy\" and not as \"I love you\". \n\nFor example, we work together and he was leaving early for a doc appt so I decided to walk out to the parking lot with him. He kept saying, \"It's ok\" and \"I'm fine you don't have to worry\", when all I was doing was just walking him out because I felt like it. \n\nAnother example was we hadn't really spent much time together in the past few weeks and so when we finally were able to hang out together I told him that I missed him. He looked at me weird and said, \"But I see you all the time....\", totally blowing off the fact that this was the first time we actually got to hang out in a while. Maybe he just didn't think about it, but it hurt because I felt like my feelings were petty and invalid. \n\nThese are just a few things that happened recently, but this is an ongoing issue with our relationship and I feel so unloved because I don't feel like my feelings are be reciprocated by him. Like my feelings are annoying to him and bother him. I don't want to break up, but I hate always wondering if he doesn't reciprocate my affection because he doesn't love me. He has mentioned that in previous relationships he was cuddly and affectionate, but his ex girlfriends were cold and distant (according to him).", "summary": "My boyfriend constantly blows my feelings of affection off and discounts it as \"needy\" or \"clingy\" and I always feel like I need validation for how he feels about me."}
{"id": "t3_1nethz", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "So alone and at the end of myself", "post": "The past weeks have been a blur of chaos for me. I've been extremely busy with work, being sent all over the place. I've had continuing issues with my supervisor. I've had to deal with my sister and brother-in-law not caring about anyone but themselves; the sister letting me know how horrible of a person she sees me as.  I have no friends to turn to. I've been so alone for so many years, it feels like a futile effort any time I try to change that. I'm turning 31 this year and have yet to find a wife (something I've longed for for most of my life).\n\nTo top it all off, another family member who has a history of poor decisions was kicked out / broken up with and has nothing, nowhere to stay, no way to get around; nothing. So I did what I could and got him set up in an extended stay for the week. I want to help him get on his feet, but feel so ill equipped with where I'm at. I can't even get my own life right, how can I help him get on his feet?\n\nI know there aren't many details, but I figured the", "summary": "version is better than the diatribe I'd otherwise have to put out. I'm just exhausted, alone, miserable and hopeless. When will it change? What's the point if this is the best I'm going to get?"}
{"id": "t3_18rpxt", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I (21F) am trying to figure out how to talk to a guy I like", "post": "Well I just got out of a divorce and was with that person since I was 15. I never got a chance to figure out how to interact with someone you would want to date. I am a single mom and a very very nervous person (I cannot emphasize that enough.) There is a guy in one of my classes and I see him around campus alot because he has classes in the building I do. I haven't really talked to him about much just some here and there. I have know idea how to show interest without simply coming out and saying it. I am to afraid to just say anything to him about it. So I am in between a rock and a hard place. To be honest I feel as if I have all of this stuff going against me and that I am not good enough to try to have a relationship with someone but on the other hand I want to find someone before my son gets old enough that my dating would affect him. Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Single anxious mom doesn't know what the hell to do about the guy she likes and is too nervous to really talk to him."}
{"id": "t3_2qxo0e", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not spending new years with my best friends", "post": "So this was in the planning for a few weeks, I wanted to take this girl that Im close with to a party my friends always host but we never planned one tilll a few days before the event. Because of that her mum didnt feel comfortable about not having plans so she said thay she can have a couple of friends over and Im invited, I didnt decline as I wanted to spend it with her. Day after day more people bailed and it was down to 4 people including me but one of which liked the girl Im into.\n\nSo the night of new years arrived and I spent the first 3 hours hanging with the closest friends I could ask for but then I had to split to go to this other party. Straight away I can see him flirting with her and getting close while I sat there bored out of my brains, Im used to drinking heaps and playing board games or card games (friend tradition) but instead we were not drinking much and played xbox instead. I liturally felt like a fish out of water and just wanted to get wasted before the year ends, I spend my last day of the year unhappy with my surroundings and feel like I ditched my friends just to think I was going to have a great night. Now Im going to have to lie to my friends and say I had an amazing night when really I would of preferred to be alone then in the situation I was in :(", "summary": "wanted to take a girl to a new yeara party, endes up making our own, I end up getting jealous and regret not spending the night with my beat friends! "}
{"id": "t3_4hkzyq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my Bf[23M] 4yrs and best friend [22M] I'm falling for my best friend, what should I do.", "post": "I've been with my bf for 4 years now, living together for 2. He is my first serious relationship, and I though he was the one, but as I get closer to my Best friend, I realise that I'm not inlove with my boyfriend anymore, and want to test the waters with my friend.\n\nMy friend has already expressed interest in being with me, and honestly he is my form of a perfect man. The only things stopping him from pursuing me any further is my bf and that he lives 8hrs away, in Canada. I've already confided in Him that I have planned on moving close to his Providence once my visa is confirmed.\n\n I'm really confused because I have such strong feelings\nFor him, but I also love my boyfriend and his family. \n\nShould I test the waters with my friend, or stay here I'm at?", "summary": "Do I break up with Bf, and move out of country to be with my friend, or do I stay?"}
{"id": "t3_1djf79", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [24f] never wants to have kids, but I [26m] eventually do", "post": "Throwaway is because she also uses reddit.\nMy girlfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years now and things are very serious between us. We've been living together for about 6 months now and things have been pretty much perfect. We have similar interests and ambitions and I really feel like she makes me a better person, I love her. The only problem is that she never wants to have children and I really want to have a family.\n\nI think her dislike of children stems from her being bullied a lot as a child, having a terrible childhood herself, and generally having bad experiences with children as an adult. She is completely unable to interact with other peoples children, and has very little patience for them. It's so strange because she's a very kind and understanding person towards other adults, she's one of the nicest people I've ever met. She also studies medicine and the thought of pregnancy and giving birth seems very unappealing to her.\n\nI don't know what to do, I've been thinking a lot about the future lately and taking the relationship further but I don't know if I can do it knowing that I may never have children if I do. I've tried talking to her about it, and suggesting she talk to a psychologist to try to disassociate the bullying from how she sees children but she isn't too keen on the idea. I've also tried to look at the positives of having a life without children, to try to gauge whether it's worth it or not. But I'm just very unsure and If anyone has had a similar experience I would love some advice.", "summary": "Thinking about taking relationship to the next level but my girlfriend never wants to have kids and I do, and I don't know if I'm capable of committing to a life without them."}
{"id": "t3_1724ub", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What was the most regrettable decision you made as a kid that led to an embarrassing situation?", "post": "I used to walk to school in the 3rd grade.  At the halfway mark, I felt a pressure bubbling in my gut.  Thinking it was just gas, I squeezed out the fart only to have my underoos instantly ruined by butt mud.  The walk back home was too long and I was going to be late, so my 10 year old brain said screw it, just go to school like this.\n\nI spent the rest of the day pretending to be shocked by the stench of shit around me when my classmates would say, \"what's that smell?!  Smells like poop.\"", "summary": "Decided to go to school with sharted pants. Pretended that it was someone/something else that smelled like shit."}
{"id": "t3_2ej707", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "GF [25] broke up with me [M/28] one week after telling me I'm the one.", "post": "We met a month ago. Everything went awesome. We were \"official\" two weeks later. Everything began fast and furiously. She told me she loved me and said she was SURE, more sure than anything else in her life that I was \"the one\". She trusted me enough to meet and hang out w/ her son. She met my daughter. Everything was great, even the sex. \n\nSo, last Tuesday, I stayed at her house and everything was fine until we got in bed. She went cold. Didn't touch me at all, no sex. Wednesday night, same thing, even sleeping fully clothed this time. Saturday night, same thing once again. I texted her the next morning and asked her to tell me what's going on. She said: \"Maybe we moved to fast. You're such an amazingly sweet guy... I'm just not feeling it as much as I was wanting it to work\"... \n\nI text her and say well let's talk about this because I don't believe you just aren't feeling me; you wouldn't allow me to meet your son if you weren't into me. Told your family about me, etc. She's FIERCELY protective of her son, I can't see her introducing me into his life if she wasn't into me, only to dump me a week later. \n\nShe agreed to dinner but due to somethings we didn't get to meet. She said \"let's talk tomorrow when I'm thinking clearly. I'm overwhelmed. I'm sorry.\" I'm going over her house tonight to talk about it. \n\nWhat do you guys think is going on here?", "summary": "GF said I was the one after 3 weeks of dating and said she loves me. One week later she dumps and tells me she's \"not feeling it\"."}
{"id": "t3_w9cbk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend is going through a lot of acute stress; how can I help him while I am 300 miles away?", "post": "My friend (21M) whom I (21F) was dating for a couple months before I moved away (we're just \"casual\"/friends now) is going through a lot of acute stress in his life at the moment. He recently broke his arm and is stressing about that because it interferes with him being able to work out (which he used to do to keep him in his \"groove\") and do a lot of other things, a lot of things at his apartment are getting broken, he got his car totaled in an accident, one of his family members was suddenly sent to the hospital, etc. I wish I were there by his side, but I'm 300 miles away, and I don't know what I could do to help alleviate his stress. When we talk on the phone, I try my best to be understanding and be a good listening ear so he could at least talk about it and vent, but he's pretty emotionally reserved and doesn't delve into his problems and instead asks me about my day and what I'm going through. I guess he doesn't like talking about that stuff, so I want to see if I could help him in other ways. r/relationships, what do you recommend?", "summary": "Friend is going through a lot of stress from different things going on in his life, but I'm 300 miles away and don't know how I could help him feel better."}
{"id": "t3_44zri8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [20 F] right in asking my fiance [25 M] to wear a tuxedo, rather than kilt, at our wedding?", "post": "Hi everyone, I'm totally new here but I'm searching for some advice so thank you in advance if you choose to share your opinion with me :)\nSo, my boyfriend and I got engaged over a month ago and I've already started to plan our wedding. I can't wait to get married - I've been dreaming of the day coming ever since I was little - and I want everything to be perfect, the way I imagined. As you might probably suspect from my question, my fiance is Scottish and I'm not. And mind you, he is very - I mean VERY - proud of his heritage and ancestry and what follows, wears his kilt to every celebration. The point is, I've always imagined my wedding traditional, with my groom wearing a tuxedo and I can't get used to the idea of him wearing a kilt and hiring a piper for our special day. I'm definitely talking him out of bagpipes but I know for sure that he wants to wear kilt and nothing else for the wedding.\nNow my question is, am I selfish to ask him to wear something else for me? Would YOU say yes if your SO asked for sth like that?\nI'm torn because I don't want to force him or make him give the kilt up because of guilt but at the same time, I know how perfect it'll be if he wears a tux :(\nI know it's trivial compared to other problems people share here but it's really important for me. So if you take your time to give your opinion it's much appreciated!", "summary": "My fiance is very proud of being Scottish and insists on wearing his kilt to all celebrations. I want him to wear tuxedo for our wedding, is it wrong of me to ask him to give the kilt up?"}
{"id": "t3_snx76", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I don't care how petty it may be, I want revenge. Any ideas?", "post": "I run the front desk at a salon, and just had an extremely stressful day after one of my stylists called in sick and I had to reschedule all of her clients [most of them were very rude to me; some of them yelled and hung up on me].  She said she was having terrible tooth pain, and she was going to an emergency dentist, so I told her to take care of herself and not to worry about it.  I just got home and saw that my manager posted a bunch of new pictures on Facebook of her day today.  I was looking through them and realized that the stylist who was supposed to be at the emergency dentist was caught in one of the pictures.  Apparently they had a lovely day at the aquarium together, while I was stuck at work being verbally harassed by her clients.  I am so mad right now, but I don't want to just confront them.  I want to fuck with their minds.  I want revenge.  Any ideas?", "summary": "Got yelled at all day by customers when I was covering for a coworker, only to find out that she was faking sick and my manager was in on it.  How can I get back at them?"}
{"id": "t3_1w689e", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "I need help with harassment over the internet!!", "post": "This is the short version of my story. I live in Southwestern Virginia. My wife has been harassed over Facebook going on three years now. The people have done everything from spread lies and rumors to our family and friends, create fake accounts of both of us, created fake accounts with the purpose of contacting our college to get us kicked out, and just about anything else you could imagine someone doing to ruin your life over Facebook. One of the times they did this it resulted in our child being taken by child protective services for a week while the courts tried to convict us of child abuse. \n\nNow the reason I'm coming to you Reddit is that every police agency we go to gives us some crap line of how they are not breaking any laws or says they can do something but the case has to be started at a lower level which won't do anything. So my question is what can reasonably be done to get these people to quit or pay for the hell they have been putting us through.", "summary": "Me and my wife have been harassed through Facebook for 3 years and nobody will do anything to help stop them because we are over 18 and thus is not considered cyberbulling. What can we do?"}
{"id": "t3_20izvv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with [19 F], dating for 2 months. Never had a serious relationship before, looking for advice.", "post": "We're both in college, and as with many college relationships it started as a hookup at a party. It pretty quickly reached a level of emotional intimacy that I haven't experienced before and we've kept seeing each other. We've both gotten around a bit (had sex with multiple of each others friends) but we've both been upfront about it and are comfortable with it.\n\nA few weeks ago we talked about being exclusive \nand both agreed to it. A few days later she had a tough night with a friend and was drunk and expressed to me some doubts. She's a freshman and I'm a junior, and she said that I'd already gotten to experience being single and on the scene my freshman year and she thought she might want it too. A couple days later when we were both sober we talked about it again and I made it clear that if she felt that way then I'd rather we end things now before it got too serious, and that we should only keep going if she really wanted to. She said that she did and that I'm the only guy she's met in college that has made her feel important and not just like she's being used.\n\nOther than that issue things have been going great. I've had the opportunity to have a relationship before but from a combination of fear of commitment / high standards for relationships vs. hookups / insert other excuse I've always backed out before things got too serious. This is different and I really like where we are and would like to see where things go.\n\nDue to my lack of previous relationship experience, I'd love outside advice. What are good practices and tips to help build and strengthen a new relationship?", "summary": "Never been in a serious/long-term relationship before, what can I do in my current one to help it last?"}
{"id": "t3_ddc1m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "AskReddit: Can you help me with my career choice?", "post": "Hello Reddit,\n\nFirst off, I live in Illinois. I am 23 and graduated college with a BA in mathematics this May. I was not going for this, it just kind of happened. I was originally going for my teaching certificate to teach high school and middle school math. I completed all my classes except for student teach. I did not student teach because I did not pass my content area test (which is math) and you have to pass this before you student teaching. I took the test 5 times with no luck. I think my test stress and general lack of knowledge in math is why I can't pass. Although I know enough about math to get my degree in it. So who knows. Illinois passed a law recently that you can only take the content area test five times. So they are letting me take it one more time if I wanted. I did not take it, and decided just to graduate with my math degree. I always think about trying to take it one more time, or to try to get my certification in another state. My husband and I are willing to move anywhere (although preferable by the beach). I am just afraid that I will never be able to pass the math test and therefore wasting my time. Also, I am not even sure how to start trying to get my certification in another state. I already wasted a lot of time and money taking all the education classes and don't really want to have to take them all again. \n\nI have been working at daycares most my life. But just recently quit because my husband got a job and I hated it. Just a few days ago, I was asked to take this management position of people who sell perfumes and colognes. I have never been a manager, and don't really know if I want to. It pays well and would be a change, but I think my heart is still with teaching. Although, with all that has happens makes me want to yell \"screw teaching\" and forget all about it.\n\nSo my question is, should I continue to try to teach, which is what I always wanted to do, or take this management job? Should I do management for a few years as I try to get my certification?", "summary": "I can't pass the content area test to get my teaching certification, but that is really what I want to do. I was just asked to be a manger, should I take it?"}
{"id": "t3_54c1ld", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By going to bed early and breaking my pelvis", "post": "Like many this didn't happen today but about a week ago.\n\nMy gf, my 2 roommates and I were in my garage playing pool, darts and drinking beer as usual.\n\nI had things to do on Saturday so I decided to call it an early night and go to bed around 1030pm. Everyone else was thirsty and stayed in the garage to lubricate a bit more.\n\nI have a balconey off my room that sits about 12' above my back patio with a 34\" railing. I often have a before bed smoke through the sliding glass door, and I can only assume thats what I intended to do as I was in my underwear and ready for bed.\n\nI must have tripped on something but I remember seeing my feet above my head and then hitting the ground. HARD.\n\nI fell about 15 feet and landed on my side on patio stone. Thank God I didnt hit my head, my head actually hit my bicept on impact. I remember grunting but passed out almost immediately.\n\nWhen I came to I yelled for help but with the music on in the garage I knew they couldn't hear me. So I sucked it up and crawled inside on my belly. Not sure how I opened the back door, or crawled what ended up being about 60 feet, but I made it to the bottom of the basement stairs.\n\nI yelled for help but to no avail. I tried to climb the stairs but that wasnt happening. So I accepted my predicament and laid in wait. \n\nThey came in around 2am and found me, thinking I had fallen down the stairs. They couldn't believe I crawled my way in like a wounded soldier.\n\n9-1-1. Ambulance. CT scans. The whole bit. Turns out I broke my pelvis and won't walk for 3 months.\n\nNext time I'm just going to keep drinking.", "summary": "Went to bed early. Fell off my 15' balconey. Crawled 60' and was found 3 hrs later with a broken pelvis. Wont walk for 3 months. Should've stayed outside and got drunk."}
{"id": "t3_1k1jvy", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I hate my best friend's choices in guys.", "post": "Okay Mainly I hate her choice in guys. She's awesome. She's got a master's degree. She's got a great job teaching. She's attractive to most. But fucking damn does she know how to pick them. She has this almost delusional sense of what love is. She has been one of my best friends since 6th grade (almost 16 of friendship) We were even roommates for a year I love her to death. But I can't fucking stand any dude she has dated. They just take advantage of her naivette, she's is currently in love with a dead beat dude, who has cheated on her multiple times with girls off craigslist as well as with the bartenders of the places we all frequent. She knows this, which just irks the hell out of me.    \n\nI am about tired of bailing her out and being there for her. I wish her nothing but the best, but I'm tired of hearing the same sob story about him cheating on you.", "summary": "Best friend dates a bunch of dirt bags who fucks girls off craigslist behind her back. I'm tired of it."}
{"id": "t3_jw87c", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Need student credit help! Interesting situation and need your help!", "post": "I am currently a senior in college and will be graduating in may. I have taken out 3 loans to help finance my schooling. \n\n1) $7500 Federal loan ($2500 subsidized and $5000 unsub)\n2) $7500 Federal loan ($2500 sub and $5000 unsub)\n3) $20,000 Private loan \n\nI have just come across $30,000. I have no credit and no credit cards. Do you guys have any suggestions on how I should pay off my loans to possibly start building some credit? I was thinking about paying off the private loan immediately so I don't accrue any interest. Then slowly pay off the Federal loans b/c they have a lower interest rate.\n\nI have never been in this situation before so I was hoping you guys could help me out.", "summary": "have 35k in student loans, 2 fed 1 private. just got $30k. how should i pay off my loans to build credit?"}
{"id": "t3_ovd60", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I avoid political robo-calls? Or, how do I avoid gouging my eyes out?", "post": "I received my first robo-call toady (then a second, shortly after). The election cycle is taking off and these calls are to be expected, I guess. I've received them in the past and I haven't found a way to avoid them.    \n\nThey wouldn't be such a pain if they weren't calling *my mobile phone*. I haven't spoken to my carrier, but I have to imagine there's something they can do. I've even tried calling the party headquarters, PAC's, etc., but to no avail.    \n\nI know they go through the population of registered voters, so I wonder: Is this just an unpleasant side effect of being a registered voter? Is there nothing I can do?    \n\n[It's bad enough they've infiltrated my Twitter feed.]    \n\nI'm up to my eyeballs in shitty political ads. I'm just fucking tired of it. I'm relatively informed. I actively seek out information on my own. I don't need them calling my **personal fucking cell phone**.    \n\nAnyone have any ideas? Suggestions?", "summary": "Political robo-calls (and ads in general) are fucking killing me! How do I tell them to fuck off?"}
{"id": "t3_211d5e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] am considering contacting my ex [22? F] after 5 or 6 years of no contact to bury the hatchet so to speak.", "post": "She was my first love and we dated for about 1.5 years in high school which ended really badly.  She wasn't sure what she wanted so she strung me along while she was dating another guy for about 6 months before we officially broke up.  I was heart broken needless to say.\n\nI would say that it jaded me for the longest time to the point that I let opportunities pass because i had a \"fuck it everything is a waste of time\" mentality.  It made me harbor a lot of resentment towards her and made me insecure to the point that i didn't date anyone for 3 years after that.  Nowadays she rarely comes up in my mind except once in a while.  Her sister still wishes me a happy birthday and tells me that my ex feels remorse for how we ended.  \n\nTo get to the point, I feel like my past relationship is subconsciously effecting any new relationships I have.  Its hard for me to trust people in general to the point i close myself off. and yet, if i do let a girl in i panic and over-think everything.  I think it really gets in the way of future prospects.\n\nI want to contact my ex because i feel like i'm dragging this weight around and its influencing how i act when a girl i'm interested in shows up.  I have zero interest of pursue this to reconnect or even make a friend, this is mostly to clear the air.  I know now that i wasn't completely blameless like i used to think.  i feel like i need to confront my past and clear the air to get a grip on my future", "summary": "Been broken up with my first love for 6 years after a shitty breakup.  Years later I don't have feelings for her but just feel like i never dealt with the leftover problems."}
{"id": "t3_4mhlc1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Myself [30f] with so[30m] of ten years. Need advice with a situation that happened tonight.", "post": "My so of 10 years,  he went to a work do tonight after he left he stopped at a gas station to get me some water, when he got back he had a story of a women who started hitting on him, asking if she could touch his hair, his plans for the night, if she could have his number. He told me he showed her his wedding ring and said he was married, we laughed about the odd encounter and then he promptly fell asleep. \nI went to the bathroom and came back and checked he had his alarm set since he had passed out so quickly. That is when I noticed that his contacts were open with her name and number....\nReddit, what do I do? Do I give him the benefit of the doubt as I know he hates awkward situations and see him taking her number just to get rid of her or am I just being naive? Help a girl out please.", "summary": "SO comes back from gas station with story about being hit on, makes out to seem like he turned her down but saw number in his phone."}
{"id": "t3_2soc9w", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by blasting my guilty pleasure playlist for my entire school to hear", "post": "OK, first a little background: I run the light and sound for my school's productions.  I know every little bit of technology in the entire theater and then some.  Right now, we are in tech week (the stressful week before a show full of rehearsals and crying) for the annual dance show.\n\nOn to the story:  After a few practices of the opening act, the directors call together a cast meeting to map out what will be done today.  So I think to myself: \"I have about 15 minutes to do whatever. Might as well listen to some music.\"  Now earlier this year, I learned a trick to route all sound directly into the booth and only to the booth.  So I plug in my phone and put on my favorite playlist, accurately titled \"Guilty Pleasures\".  It is riddled with everything from Rude Boy to various K-Pop songs.  I put it on shuffle and start jamming out, knowing that my foolproof method was keeping embarrassment at bay.  2 minutes into Fergalicious, I hear one of the directors shouting: \"AGELFDUDE23, WOULD YOU *PLEASE* TURN OFF THAT MUSIC?!?\".  I then learned that God has a funny sense of humor, as one of the monitors was left on.  Everyone had heard every song.  After processing what I had just heard, I rip out the aux cord and hide from sight to avoid further embarrassment.  I am never using that damn thing again.", "summary": "The tech booth that I thought was my friend betrayed me by revealing all my guilty pleasure songs to 1/4 of the school"}
{"id": "t3_38f3mk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[25f] aunt[46f] might make the bank repossess my car because I am not sharing my wifi connection.", "post": "I am a freelancer and being one in my country, I basically cannot take up loans under my name because I can't provide proof I have a stable income even though my salary is higher than the average in my field. I wanted to buy a car for my parents to help them with their small business. So I asked my aunt to put the car loan under her name. She agreed and I got the car last year.\n\nThen I was eating dinner last night when I received a text from my aunt asking me: \n\n>wifiproblem001, why are you not sharing your wifi anymore? We're paying for it promptly but why are you so selfish when I did you a favor of using my name and credentials so that you can buy a car?\n   \n\nI have two internet connection at home from different provider so that I can have a backup just in case my main connection fails. My work heavily relies on the internet so I cannot really afford to lose internet connection. I am sharing the backup connection with my aunt as I rarely use it. We both agreed before that we'll split the cost but the last payment that my aunt gave me was last January and they dont really pay on time. Sometimes they skip months or whenever they feel like paying(these were even before I asked her for the car loan). So I told her that the last payment they had was last January and I thought they don't want to use the wifi anymore because I kept on asking her daughter and she kept on saying she don't know and they're not paying anymore.  \n\nNow what I am afraid to happen is that my aunt will ask the bank to cancel the loan and have the car repossessed. I can totally see her doing that because she's quite bitchy(a lot of people hate her). All the money that I already paid in advance to the bank + the downpayment I initially paid will all go to waste. What should I do??", "summary": "My bitchy aunt is mad at me because I am not sharing my wifi anymore. And because of that, she might ask the bank to cancel the loan for my car that is under her name."}
{"id": "t3_jkv2c", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Got bitten by a dog today (pics inside). Advice for filing charges and/or prevention?", "post": "My [vizsla] and I were out for a 7am run, and near the end I saw an aggressive pair of Rottweilers crossing their electrical barrier behind us in my peripheral vision.  So I picked up speed.  It didn't work, and they chased us, snarling, and tackled my dog to the ground.  I yelled \"no!\" at them while my dog was yelping, but they were frenzied, and even at my most furious I am not that intimidating.  I managed to pull my dog to his feet by his leash while yelling at the dogs, and we backed away, but as soon as I turned around the more aggressive dog charged and grabbed my calf.  I screamed again and kicked it and kept backing away and yelling \"no!\" until they stopped advancing.  Then we were over the hill and sprinting home.\n\nI have 8 puncture wounds on my calf, some of which were bleeding out fatty tissue since they went through the skin.  Sick.  I had them treated at an ER, so my leg will be fine. Photos- [side of leg] and [back of leg](\n\nI called the sheriff's office, and a deputy came out and maced the dogs--which didn't have their electric collars on, were still running loose, and ran at him when he entered their yard.  He gave me the option of pressing charges, and I am trying to decide whether I'm over-reacting by going forward with it.  The deputy did say he had a report of the dogs biting an elderly man's ankle in 2009, so I am leaning toward yes....\n\nAnyway, advice?  I'm at home taking care of my mom post-surgery, so it's not my usual route, but I kept on the opposite side of the street and didn't make eye contact.  Maybe I can start carrying pepper spray.", "summary": "got bitten while running with dog, gory photos for your pleasure, how to successfully fend off dogs in future, whether to press charges?"}
{"id": "t3_3est6o", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by browsing photobucket", "post": "Well... this happened last night, late, and I'm still not sure what to do. Last night I was browsing photobucket and I came upon a picture of a man and a woman. I clicked the photo and immediately didn't know what to do. Apparently I stumbled upon a mass collection of photos from an affair. So what do I do? Well, I enjoy a mystery, so I try to figure it out. What I discovered was more sinister than I had imagined...\n\nThe 'man' is a coach at a high school where the 'woman' is (was because graduated in the spring apparently) a student. To boot, I found out through some searching that he is married to a middle school teacher in the same area and they might have a daughter. His photobucket account was created with the name of the student's father and contains plenty of incriminating pictures and texts ranging far back before she had graduated. Now... I didn't know what to do... I figured HEY, maybe his wife would like to know. So I found her name, sent her a message containing links to an imgur album with photos from the affair and a direct link to his photobucket. I also emailed her school email I found on the site. She hasn't yet responded. \n\nNOW. If this were just an affair I think I have done my part. BUT... because this occurred between a student and a teacher... there's obviously more at stake here.\n\nSO. Reddit, I need your help. WHAT DO I DO. Email the Principal? I'd rather stay anonymous.\n\nAlso, I do have proof, but I'm not sure how to go about that so if a mod wants to message me that'd be cool. I have some edited pictures but I don't want to post anything that leaks a minor's 'photos'.", "summary": "TIFU by browsing photobucket and discovering a criminal affair between a teacher and a student. From bedreddit to super sleuth. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3ymige", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Trouble breaking up with my [f19] boyfriend [m19]?", "post": "We've been together for almost three years, but I've been trying to end things. I still care for him but I think it's for the better if we part ways. I told him this and what I was unhappy about, and we agreed to meet up to talk it over. We ended up crying, cuddling, and agreed we didn't resent each other for what happened. I fell asleep and left for home after waking up, and he was very affectionate to me the whole time. After returning home I asked him what he thought we were now, and if we're still broken up like I intended. He said he didn't think so, and I replied we could talk it over later. Did I give him the wrong impression? How should I go about rectifying things without hurting him more than necessary? Thanks guys.", "summary": "I attempted to break up with my bf, but we ended up cuddling and sleeping in the same bed while crying. He doesn't seem to think we're still broken up now. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_36g9li", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my girlfriend [21 M/F] of 3 years. How do I break up?", "post": "I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years now. We were high school sweethearts and basically went through so much together\u2014long distance and everything.\n\nThe thing is, it was always very, very abusive; she was always putting me down, accusing me, calling me a cheater, and everything you can possibly imagine. I always, always forgave her though, because I felt like she would come along in the end.\n\nShe never, ever has, though. I have given her so many second chances, and I truly feel as if I am sacrificing way too much of my life. Now, she's wanting another chance and swears that she has changed, that she cares. I have no doubt that she cares, but I just truly doubt that I can ever be happy in this anymore regardless of whether she changes or not.\n\nI truly think I need to distance myself from this relationship to ever find a semblance of happiness again. \n\nI just am having a very, very hard time with it. She is crying, saying she will withdraw from the semester at school due to emotional distress, and saying she can't cope or handle this. The thing is, I have been suffering greatly at school as well for the last few years due to the relationship, so it's not like it's just her.\n\nI feel very, very lost, and I know deep down I can't do this anymore. It just is so messy and entangled that I simply don't know what to do anymore.", "summary": "Stuck in a long relationship, have a gut feeling I can't ever be happy in it and want to end it before it gets even worse, can't make the final decision."}
{"id": "t3_1q90tk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20/F] am having problems dealing with the touring job of my boyfriend of 6 months [22/M] Not sure what to do. =/", "post": "I met my boyfriend in April and we started dating in May before becoming exclusive in June. At the time he had a job in theatre and would spend short times (A month or less) away doing shows around the country.\n\nHe was given an amazing job opportunity in August and went on tour for 3 months with a prestigious theatre company. It's been very difficult being left alone but we've tried to deal as best we can. He's busy during the evenings and weekends with work and I am in my final year of college which takes up my days. We end up not speaking for days or even weeks.\n\nThe company want him back for the next tour which he is ecstatic about BUT... it's 5 months long. I would never ask him to not go because it's an great career move for him and he'd resent me. However, I don't want to be alone for 5 months. To me, that isn't really a relationship and I didn't sign up to do a long distance thing (again). \n\nI do love him and would hate for things to end but it seems like being single wouldn't be much different from what we have when he's away. It's clear that I'm not a priority which upsets me.\n\nAny advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Boyfriend accepted 5 month touring job but I don't want to be alone for half the year... What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_4hsd1d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I, [24 F] am afraid that my boyfriend, [28 m] might not be attracted to me. What should I do?", "post": "I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year. A little background - he's a very handsome guy, and I'm cute but not exactly a head-turner. We met on an online dating site and originally I had gotten a vibe that he wasn't interested physically, just something about his body language, but we hit it off really well and eventually things turned physical and we became a couple. Like most new relationships, the sex was frequent and passionate but it dwindled down to once a week and eventually about once a month. I've tried talking to him about it and he says that he's just tired and depressed, but nothing has really changed in his life and he doesn't seem depressed. The most recent time I brought it up he said that he doesn't know why he doesn't want to have sex and that he feels bad that I want to and he doesn't. It's gotten to the point at which I don't even want to be around him despite the fact that he's my best friend because it hurts too much. \n\nI already have body image issues and I have a medical condition that causes me to be underweight no matter what I do so it's not like I can improve my appearance for him. I also am insecure because I was previously with someone who withheld sex for months and told me I wasn't attractive in order to abuse and manipulate me. My current boyfriend is a wonderful person and I don't want to lose him because of this.\n\nAlso, I should add that I haven't had any reason to suspect that there's anyone else so that doesn't really factor into this situation.", "summary": "Boyfriend has stopped being interested in sex, I'm paranoid that he isn't attracted to me. How can I talk to him about it?"}
{"id": "t3_3cj3cv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (26F) love my boyfriend (25M) of four years. I recently have started having feelings for someone else, but still love my boyfriend. I feel awful and dishonest. What should I do?", "post": "I have been in a relationship with (let's call him Bob) for four years. I love him with all of my heart. Lately, I feel that the relationship has become cold. I feel like he does still pay some attention to me, but not like he used to. He is very nice and easy to talk to. I have talked to him about how I feel before, and he has worked on it, but it always seems to steadily drop off.\n\nNow comes the hard part. I work with another man (let's call him Al) with whom I have been friends with for a while. Lately, I have developed feelings for him. I have waited and done nothing for months hoping the feelings I have for Al to go away to no avail. I know he is aware of how I feel and likes me too, and we are both smart people. We have not been intimate in any way, shape, or form. I know now that the feelings aren't going away, and even though I haven't done anything to be physically unfaithful to Bob, I have emotionally. I do still love Bob, but I feel like I am starting to feel for Al more. \n\nI feel like a disgusting human being who should be grateful for whom I have. If I break it off, it could be the biggest mistake of my life. I love Bob's family, and we grew up together as kids, so this wouldn't be easy. I would lose so much, but I feel like staying for him is wrong and hurtful. I know nothing of the turn-out with Al, but I can't live with myself knowing I'm not being honest. I would never cheat on Bob.\n\nI live in an apartment with Bob, have two cats (one his, one mine). I don't want to hurt him, but even if nothing ever happens with Al, I don't think he should be put through this.\n\nWHAT SHOULD I DO?", "summary": "I love my boyfriend, but not like I used to. I have feelings for someone else and have never acted on them, but still feel unfaithful. I need advice on how to deal with this."}
{"id": "t3_24n9r2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[28M] Terrified at the idea of something getting physical", "post": "I used to have bad social anxiety so interacting with anyone, male or female was difficult unless we were friends. I've mostly overcome that over the last few years to the point where I would consider myself relatively socially adept. I can spark conversations with strangers, no issues talking to pretty girls at a party etc.\n\nSo, with my new found social prowess I've finally been interacting with people and had some women who enjoyed my company. Great right? Except I respond by freaking out and basically rejecting/friend-zoning them so they figure I'm not interested. It doesn't even seem like a conscious decision, by brain seems to just auto pilot to diffusing any potential romantic escalation despite how badly I actually want it.\n\nAfter a lot of reflection I believe it's both a self esteem and sex thing. I haven't had sex, despite a few opportunities over the years with people virtually offering. My refusals have been due to low self esteem - I'm overweight, nothing crazy but it's enough that I refuse to take off my shirt around other people because I'm ashamed. I'm also ashamed to have not had sex yet and I think the person will work it out which terrifies me.\n\nI'm working on the weight thing, 40lbs down, 40lbs till my goal weight. The sex thing is more of an issue. I was considering paying for it to reduce the anxiety of totally failing with a person I'm actually interested in but the idea doesn't thrill me. I also have a romantic idea that if I get buff enough the other party won't be so concerned that I don't appear to know what I'm doing but that's realistically another 18 months away.\n\nAny advice or related anecdotes would be much appreciated.", "summary": "I actively shut down anything that might turn physical because I'm terrified both of being outed as a virgin and the prospect of getting naked in front of somebody."}
{"id": "t3_288uwq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[24/m] My GF (23/f) getting a little tired of her not being in control of her emotions.", "post": "Long story short...\nWe've been dating for 2 years, recently moved in with each other. Fighting a little bit about stupid petty things that I don't really take to heart because its a big change for both of us and it's bound to happen. About a week ago her cat got sick with this disease, and me being the super supportive boyfriend I am drove her everywhere she needed to be, made my self available at work to answer her calls if she was worried, and stayed up all night with him so she could get some sleep. Now I took some time off work so I could come home and see my family ( I don't live in the same city as them anymore, and haven't seen them in two months), and tonight I got a call with her freaking out because she thinks her cat is sick again, and she needs to take him to the vet. She asked me to come home, and I just straight out told her no... I didn't want to leave my family, not to mention I live two hours away. I still have one day left of my \"vacation\" and I want to enjoy to most of it with them because I likely wont get a chance to see them again until September. She over reacts ,and over thinks thinks on a regular basis, and this incident was pretty much the straw that broke the camels back. I feel a little guilty for not going home early, but at the same time I'd feel even worse if I left my family. Shes not answering my texts or calls now. I'm just going to ignore this for the time being, enjoy the rest of Fathers Day with my family. Is this okay? or am I being a huge ass about it?", "summary": "Girlfriend is guilting me into leaving my vacation early, because she's over reacting, and not thinking logically about a situation. Looking for some reassurance's me telling her that I wont. I kinda feel like an ass."}
{"id": "t3_cyvzw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Clever way to ninja punish a police officer?", "post": "Two friends of mine were victims of police brutality yesterday when they were at a music festival. The story goes like this: \nThey saw two police officers hassling some dude because he had been using a vuvuzela. My friends go up to them to see whats was up, when they were promptly handcuffed and subsequently brutally kicked, stepped on and tasered, while totally defenseless. There are dozens of eye witnesses, and I reported the incident to the police myself, but I really doubt it will have any consequences. Thing is that I've found out where the two officers live, and really want to stick it to them, but I don't know how. Does anybody know of some trick or something that I can do to their house, car etc., that won't instantly put me in jail? My only idea is to TP the house, but that seems too undramatic.", "summary": "Friends victims of police brutality. Reported to the police, but most probably wont have any consequences. Found out where the officers live, and want to get revenge. Any ideas?"}
{"id": "t3_3orkfb", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Signing a lease/agreements", "post": "Very watered down synopisis:\n\nMe and a group of 7 (8 total) want to live in a house together. 3 of them signed on a lease but the other 5 didnt because the lease was shitty and we had it revised by a lawyer and the lawyer said dont sign it. The three that signed it put money down...100, 200, 880 respectively. The lawyer went and made some (very few) changes but its still very problematic. But lets say we end up not wanting to live in this house, is there a way to argue for the money back since the lease has changed and could technically say \"I dont agree with the lease anymore\" or no?\n\nLocation: New York", "summary": "Friends put money down on a house that we potentially may no longer want. The lease they signed on is now different than the \"official lease\" Is there a way to get the money back for them?"}
{"id": "t3_2dq3ox", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "As an Iranian, the way Europeans eat surprises me! How can it be?", "post": "So my friend had some guests coming from Germany. I took them out for a long walk in the hot temperature of our city. After two or three hours, when we are back home my friend calls me and tells me to buy them a sandwich for dinner.\nIm like. \"Dude, a sandwich wont be enough\" so he tells me to buy two.\n\nWhen its dinner time they both tell me, and insist, that they dont want dinner! Im like WHAT THE HELL?!\nOne of them tells me that he is going to have the salad which has been left over from lunch, and the other tells me he will have some fruits. Im like WHAT THE HELL HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?!!\n\nTwo days later I take them to another MUCH LONGER walk in the hot temperature (we were seeing the city so there was lots of walking). This temperature is hot for me, so it must have been very hot for someone living in Germany.\n\nWhen its lunch time, we order pizza except one of them. he says in germany he only has breakfast and one session of food.\n\nAt dinner, Im sure they must be dead hungry. Both of them tell me they are not hungry and dont want food.\n\nTheir way of food life is very different to mine and anyone I know. I wake up in the morning and have breakfast. When im back from work i have lunch, normally rice with meet or chicken. Then at dinner Im hungry again and must have another session of food. In between, i eat small things as well, like fruits etc. So this was very shocking to me how they could even survive eating so little. (and im not very fat. just a couple of kilos extra)\n\nDoes it have to do with where we live? Does living in Germany mean you need much less food than living in Iran? How can I learn to have a diet like them and be energetic, healthy but not hungry?\n\nThanks and sorry for the long post.", "summary": "Dude from Germany eats no more than one session of food a day (plus breakfast). How is it possible to eat so little? I live in Iran in case it is important for the answer."}
{"id": "t3_40l3s9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] have my first FWB [17F], not sure if I'm doing everything right and don't know how to tell parents I'm sexually active.", "post": "She and I have been FWBs for a month now. We're in 12th grade and between college applications, family, work, and recent break ups we both want a sexual connection but not a committed relationship. We're each other's first FWBs and need to make sure we're not messing up in any major way.\n\nNeither of us have gotten tested for STDs, but we both haven't had sex with anyone else and aren't currently. We also use adequate protection.\n\nI laid out some ground rules. We can date around and sleep with other people, but will give each other a heads up in case we need to get tested. Also, no actual dates. No hang outs unless they involve sex. We go out sometimes, but it's to quickly grab food or condoms. I try to keep texting for planning when we meet up, but once every while it turns into actual conversations. She insists that we should hang out like normal friends every now and then since we have a couple common interests and live close. She says it's okay cause she's \"partially aromantic\", but I'm still hesitant.\n\nI'm not sure how to break the news to my parents. They still see me as their little boy and would probably be furious if they knew I'm not a virgin. I live with them but take care of myself for the most part (I cook, clean, do my own laundry, hold down a job, and get good grades in school. I was taught how to manage money and do taxes). I feel mature and stable enough to be sexually active but feel like parents won't see that.", "summary": "FWBs with girl. Laid out ground rules, but she insists on hanging out sometimes. I'm not sure how to tell parents I have sex."}
{"id": "t3_4jaxzl", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I'm trying to educate myself on choosing the right bank/credit union. Can anyone give me suggestions on where best to learn?", "post": "My mom helped me open my first checking and savings account when I was 18 and it was at her bank which was Washington Mutual and has since become part of Chase.  At the time it worked because I was 18, didn't know anything about banking, and just needed to have an account for jobs or whatever.\n\nIt's been almost a decade since then and I've learned a bit more about banking, though it's only enough to realize that I know very little.  I've overall not had too horrible experience with chase, though there have been frustrating situations at times.\n\nMy situation: I live in the US, married to a foreigner who has a green card, no kids.  I'd be looking to set up a joint checking/savings to handle all our major expenses and then two separate checking accounts that is in each person's name only for our personal expenses money.  We travel a decent amount with at least one trip a year being abroad.\n\nOther than the general question of resources to learn from a few more specific questions would be:  \n- I see most places mentioning that you should make sure the bank provides the services you want.  Is there a list of common services so I can see what's out there that I might not be aware of and would like?\n- Any recommended banks/credit unions?", "summary": "I'm wanting to learn enough to know if my current bank is still the right bank for me or if I'd be better off switching to a different bank.  What are the best resources you can recommend for this?"}
{"id": "t3_259wxm", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "I know it's a silly question, please don't judge me. (Dog barking)", "post": "Good morning, everyone!  I have a question that I (probably) already know the answer to, but I'm at the end of my rope so I have to ask it.\n\nI have two puppies - Tillie is 10 months old and Henry is 3.5 months old.  I've posted on here a lot and gotten a lot of great advice.  Both of my puppies are really good dogs, and are pretty trainable.\n\nMy current problem is with Henry and his barking.  It's not that he barks too much or too often.  It *seems* like he barks a lot because Tillie hardly ever barks, but I'd guess he's pretty normal.  The problem is that when he *does* bark it's like ice picks through my fucking ear drums.  His bark is so high pitched and grating that it's intolerable.  Everyone hates it including Tillie who will often snap at him to get him to shut up (*thank you, Tillie!*)  Henry is such a good, cute dog, but the family, and anyone else who can hear him, hates the sound of his voice and it's making people not want to have him around.\n\nI've tried anticipating when he's going to bark, but he's a puppy and there's just no way to accurately predict when he might get it into his puppy brain to start barking.  I'm not suggesting that he should completely stop barking, that's his means of communication and he's actually (mostly) using it appropriately.  But is there any way to train him to ... I dunno, bark a little manlier?  There's not, is there?  :-/", "summary": "Puppy's bark has the same timbre as 10,000 preteens at a One Direction concert. It's going to make us lose our minds."}
{"id": "t3_1h4ylt", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Technology help for a disabled person. Didn't know exactly where to post this.", "post": "Sorry if this isn't the right place to post this, I thought of /r/technology but I figured this isn't \"news\" or anything. \n\nSo my mom works for a lady who has polio. She was a successful accountant until a few years back when she stopped being able to do anything by herself. She still works at home doing taxes for a few clients but all with the help of my mom. She can't type, use a mouse, use a phone, nothing. There are other nurses who take care of her when my mom is off and most of them are very mean. They call her \"fat,\" and tell her all she does is it. Which is obvious because she can't do anything else. One time she tried calling the owner of the house she stays in to complain about the nurses but the nurses would not call for her. My mom has had to yell at the nurses but my mom isn't a superior so they don't listen to her. She also has trouble with using her TV. Whoever's working at night will usually put a channel on and hope she falls asleep before it gets boring so they won't have to do anything and can sleep all night. \n\nSo my mom is trying to find something that will let her do more things than she can now. As of now, if she's lucky, her Bluetooth headset will recognize the right contact she's asking for. She is very smart and can have a regular conversation, but just cant move much from the neck down. We're trying to find that and anything that will help her use voice commands on phones better.", "summary": "Trying to find devices that will help my mom's friend change channels on her TV and give orders to her phone via voice."}
{"id": "t3_327hz2", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I'm 22 Years Old and I Want to Quit my Job? Seeking Advice! (USA)", "post": "I am thinking about quitting my current job. This is a part-time job that I do just for experience. I am financially stable so I would have no problems if I quit this job, or if I can't find a job right after I quit this one. This is an administrative job that gives out extremely odd hours. Some weeks I'll be working tons, but the next I'll have no hours. There has also been changes in management recently and as I have received sparse hours, I am extremely out of the loop with the new changes. I have been working for this job for 7 months now. I feel that this company will not help me grow and I have no interest in staying. I have helped the company improve inventory management, as well as their site. I also do bookkeeping. My question is if I quite this job right now how would it affect my chances of getting a job in the future, especially since I don't intend to get another job until I graduate? Also, would the amount of time I've worked at the company affect the decision of future employers ?\n\n-\nAlso, this company does not provide paper references and only accepts call references. So they will not give me a positive reference if I put the company on paper. I am currently in school.", "summary": "I'm not happy with my job and management, but I'm not sure if I should quit as this could have a negative impact on my future chances of getting a job"}
{"id": "t3_3l54h8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[18f] suitemates [18 - 19f] think I'm bulimic", "post": "There's 6 of us including me and we're all freshman in college.it just started, but they're pretty close with each other whereas I'm sort of distant and not truly \"one of them\". But that's okay because I prefer to have it this way.\n\nAnyway, I have weird ways of trying to lose weight. Like I fast, and eat low calories, and then it makes me binge, so I make myself sick. Anyway, I didn't think they were here today, so I went to throw up, and one of my suite mates heard the noise (it's kind of obvious) and thinks I'm bulimic now. I heard her whispering to my other suite mates and now they're debating on whether to notify the RA...and it's just all really awkward and anxiety-producing because they could bring it up at any moment, and I honestly would not know what to say and would be really embarrassed because throwing up is gross, but yeah. \n\nI'm also sort of weird about eating food with other people because I don't like people watching me eat, so I usually don't go to dinner with them, so they probably think I just don't eat. But I mean, I'm not skinny at all. I'm 5'3 and 117 mostly because I binge...a lot. \n\nI really don't know what to do. And also, I don't know how I should react to them confronting me about this, which I think they might plan to do. I'm really nervous about what might happen and what they might say.", "summary": "My suite mates will probably confront me about throwing up, and I don't really know what to say/do. "}
{"id": "t3_3vho4g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 m] dating [27f] for five months, she just found out she has HSV genitally. Need Advice!!", "post": "so long story short I am a male who is dating an amazing young woman who I'm very much in love with. I am sure similar questions have posted here before but I need advice for my specific situation. She went to the doctor thinking she had a bad yeast infection and turns out after it would not clear up the doctor sent her to a gyn who ended up running some tests and diagnosing her with grnital herpes. \n\nshe told me instantly the same day and I have always been really paranoid about stis and pretty careful to avoid them after a wilder younger few years and I comforted her the best I could. Since finding this out I was blood tested and was negative for herpes. \n\nI love this girl so much. But the thought of getting herpes freaks me out a lot. I have only known this for two weeks now and we have continued to be together but have yet to be intimate since then. Obviously I can't bring this up to my friends really so I turned to the Internet. What should I do? I really pictured and still do in a lot of ways a future with this girl. Advice and support please Reddit!! Can we make this work??", "summary": "girlfriend I love and adore recently tested positive for grnital herpes. I'm negative and torn but I love her a lot."}
{"id": "t3_pb91y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I know here on Reddit we know working in IT/Tech call centers sucks and the reps really aren't bad, but what is the worst experience you have had?", "post": "For me it was a few days ago. We use Comcast here (unfortunate but all we can get in our area) and the woman I had to talk to must never have touched a computer outside of work and talked out of her ass. Our internet was supposed to be about 25 MBS but we were getting 3-4 (used speedtest.net to check for a week). So after checking everything I called up to see what was going on/get a tech to come. The woman I got spend the first 15 min telling me everything was perfectly fine. After finally getting it through to her it was not she tells me that everything was fine with them and it HAD to be my wireless router. Best part? I don't use one. I'm hard-lined. I dont even have a wireless router IN MY HOUSE. She didn't care. It was my wireless router. THEN after another 20 min of finally explaining my setup she asks how I know its slow. I told her I did the check online to their server via speedtest. She told me that's not accurate and I NEEDED to use THEIR test. I did and it was at 2. WORSE than speedtest.net. She went back to its my wireless router I must be using. I then immediately hung up, called back and asked someone to set an apt for me for a tech. They transferred me to the department and after I explained my situation I hear 4-5 clicks and a \"Oh yeah here's the problem, a tech can be there tomorrow at 2 to fix it for ya (it was their end, some type of signal problem.) Guy comes, 10 min later I'm good to go. I normally don't complain to supervisors but i called back with the her name and HAD to for the absolutely BLATANT ignorance and her not listening to a goddamn thing I was sayin", "summary": "Some bitch keeps me on the phone for over an hour saying it was a wireless routers fault that I dont use/own. Tech sees problem fixes in 10 min."}
{"id": "t3_2pnuxn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my (soon to be) ex-wife [27 F] How much money can I ask for? I want to be reasonable. We want to go through mediation.", "post": "My wife and I are in our 4th year, Probably splitting soon. Right now \nworth over around 2 million. we have 2 houses financed, selling one already. She has trusts coming for another estimated 1 million every 5 years for anther 3 payouts. She has never been employed I have been under employed. My fathers business will be going to someone else who has worked for it. I gave it up because my wife and I didn't need money. \n\nHer grandma will probably soon leave her a bigger amount of money, and in the distant future her father as well. I Am scared because I never thought money would be an issue for me after we married. I never pursued a career Because I wanted to do charitable and volunteer stuff with my time. Now that everything is changing what can I ask for? I would never sue her or anything. We will likely mediate.\nMy question is what's fair? I feel like I'm legally entitled to like 1 million. But we've planned for a life with 10+.", "summary": "Today my wife and I are rich. She is leaving me. I would like to ask that I'm still rich in the future."}
{"id": "t3_3yo3bp", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "[Dating advice] How not to appear to be a creep?", "post": "Thank you all whom take the time to read and respond. I'm a guy who's 20 years of age and still coming out of my shell in relation to girls. My main fear and biggest obstacle is knowing when to draw the line being being confident (as I'm trying to be more of) and being perceived as a creep/perv. I've been told before that I'm aparently 'cute' so it's not my looks that worry me, I just really want to make sure I don't give off the wrong/bad vibe. Generally speaking, I'm not looking for someone just becuase of the sex, I'm trying to find someone to have a connection with on an emotional level, where we can tell each other anything and all that gooey stuff.", "summary": "Guy in his early 20's trying to find a GF doesn't want to appear to want girls just for their bodies."}
{"id": "t3_3qfwci", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Difficult situation between me [18M], gf [18F] and her parents.", "post": "My gf's parents are strict Muslims and won't let her date anyone who isn't a Muslim (for the record, we're in North America, so this isn't unusual for me to not be Muslim).\n\nWe have four options:\n\n* She come comes out and says she's dating me, an non-Muslim and gets disowned and is never allowed to speak to family again. She has a bf she loves, but is sad because of no family.\n\n* I pretend to convert, we can still see each other, she keeps her family and a roof over her head. **She knows about me pretending to convert, it's her parents that don't know I'm pretending**\n\n* We break up, she keeps family, but is sad because she has no bf who loves her.\n\n* We wait until she is able to move out in about a year on good terms with her parents. However until then, it's basically a long distance relationship, which is something that I think would be difficult to maintain this for such a long time\n\nThe second choice seems more desirable, as it satisfies all parties, however this is still a big commitment, and opens up the possibility to further messes down the road. My concern is that option 2 seems like a temporary fix, and could backfire in the future. However the permanence of 1 and 3 options is also very concerning to both of us. So really option 4 seems like the best bet, but is not a sure thing.", "summary": "Gf can't date me because her parents don't want it, since i'm not Muslim. 4 things happen:"}
{"id": "t3_2c43bh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "It's getting serious with me [30 M] and her [23 F], but I don't know what to do about it.", "post": "A quick summary about me [30M] - over a year ago I ended a long term relationship that I was in that was very unhealthy. There was a lot of manipulation, and even though I was glad to be out of the relationship, it took me about a year to recover from it. I have rebuilt my confidence and now I have an ecosystem of happiness again. I couldn't be happier with life.\n\nFast forward to a few months ago I met a beautiful girl [23F] and we instantly hit it off. The only problem was - she lives in another state, but has family here and was in town visiting. Regardless, we exchanged numbers. About a month later, she visited her family again and we hung out a couple of times. It was fantastic and I really started to like her. She came over again about a month later on another visit and we spent a couple more days hanging out, and I am beginning to fall for her. I like her a lot and we get along in an almost unreal capacity.\n\nAll should be good, right? Well, lately I have been having a hard time accepting the long distance portion of it. I only see her for a couple of times a month and when I am not with her, I miss her a lot. She has expressed interest in moving to my state, but I can't help believe it's solely for me and I don't want her to do that. \n\nNot only that, but I am **just** starting to become happy and independent again and I fear getting back into a relationship this quickly might undermine that. A part of me wants to live my own life and be free and pursue a relationship much farther in the past. She has expressed that she is serious about me and wants to become an item.\n\nWith these two things in mind, I want to be honest with her and let her know how I feel. I just don't want to hurt her and I think if we continue moving forward, it might just make things worse. At the same time, *I really like her and still want her.* I am confused and don't know what to do! How should I go about figuring out what to do?", "summary": "Possible long distance relationship, she wants to move to be with me, I am having second thoughts. I want my freedom, but I still like her."}
{"id": "t3_4p3hzz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [27F] best friends [38M] husband [36M] took his wedding ring off at the bar while talking with a girl? Should I tell her?", "post": "I have been close friends with a former coworker (Leah) for about 5 years now. Our families are very close and our kids play together. Recently my boyfriend and her husband (Mike) have been spending more time together, which makes us really happy since they don't have a lot of guy time. \n\nMy boyfriend and Mike went to a bar Saturday night, and my boyfriend called me around midnight to ask if Mike and Leah had an open relationship or did any swinging. I told him absolutely not (I know my friend wouldn't ever be into that), and he explained a girl had been sending them drinks all night and chatting with them, and when she invited them to play darts, he took his ring off and put it in his wallet. Turns out the girl invited my boyfriend (only) back to her place to keep drinking, and Mike got a upset and put the ring back on. When we were laying in bed watching TV, he texted my boyfriend and said \"Sorry I got us mixed up with that skank. I hope we can keep it between us.\"\n\nI know this is a super small issue compared to a lot of other things on the sub, but it's been bothering me. I don't know if I should tell her. I am 100% positive she'd feel really betrayed if she found out I knew and didn't tell her. I also don't want to put my bf in an awkward position.", "summary": "My best friends husband took his wedding ring off when he was heavily flirting with a girl at the bar. He only put it back on once she expressed interest in my bf instead. Should I tell her?"}
{"id": "t3_4l9xwa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27M] offered 11 month contract with one of the leading tech/social companies. If accepted it would mean relocating away from my girlfriend [25F]", "post": "Hey All,\n\nSo I've just received news today that I've been offered an 11 month contract opportunity with one of the leading global tech/social companies however it's going to mean relocating away from my girlfriend of 18 months (who's amazing) if I accept.\n\nI'm super glad that I've been offered but equally worried as I don't want to lose my girlfriend who is great and incredibly supportive. We've spoken about this opportunity and she knows how ambitious I am and was happy for me to go for it but we're both going to be upset and miss each other if I accept and leave.\n\nThankfully the opportunity is in Dublin and we're currently in London so it's a 1 hour flight away and relatively cheap to get there and back.\n\nWhile I don't like the idea of leaving her I'm not sure if I'd ever get this kind of opportunity again. If it was any other company the choice would be clear but I feel that taking it would lead to amazing career progression, huge job satisfaction and hopefully continued training/development.\n\nWould love to get some final advice from anyone, especially if you've been in a similar situation.", "summary": "Offered an 11 month contract with one of the leading global tech/social companies however if I accept it means relocating away from my girlfriend. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1hbx5t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F/23] broke up with my boyfriend [M/24]. Now I've started kind of dating someone else [M/22], but how soon is too soon?", "post": "How soon is too soon?\n---\n\nI [F/23] was dating my boyfriend [M/24] for about three years. We broke up about three weeks ago. Before we broke up (at a time where I had already decided that it was going to happen), I had mentioned to my best guy friend [M/22] that I had often considered us dating but regretted saying anything and we didn't bring it up again.\n\nFast forward to a week ago, we went out with some friends, got drunk and hooked up. This week we've been hanging out a lot, and it's gone from \"I definitely want to be single for a while\" to \"I don't want to pass this up.\" He's admitted to feeling the same way.\n\nThe thing is, my ex is a great guy. It really just wasn't in the cards at all, and I still care for him as a person. We had different life goals and passions, and I could feel myself slowly becoming resentful towards him because I often felt held back doing things that he would not want to do.\n\nObviously I want to take the actual dating part very slowly, but what is the minimum amount of time I should take? Especially as I'm still close friends with some of my ex's friends as well and I still care for him as a person? I feel completely moved on from him and it feels as though it was months ago already but I know it's very different for him and I feel terrible for causing him any pain to begin with.", "summary": "Broke up with boyfriend of three years, three weeks later moved on and basically with my best guy friend. How soon is too soon to \"go public\" or really start taking dating each other seriously?"}
{"id": "t3_3yuos7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[22 M] with my Girlfriend [21 F] of almost 2 years, cancer, cuckolding and confusion.", "post": "Okay, to start off with my girlfriend has been going through some shit this year. She found out her Grandfather is terminally ill and her parents are splitting up, obviously she has an excuse to go a bit crazy. We also have this kinky thing going on where she does stuff with other dudes, which was my idea and I'm pretty comfortable with. I tell you this because of it's relevance to the situation. also, about a month ago I found out she messaged a saying she loved him. Honestly if it wasn't for what she's going through I'd of ended it at that point but she said she was just trying to get him to like her and nothing els.\n\nSo, lately she has been acting strange and it's been getting me down. She never really sees me and cancels on me but then goes out with other people, she says I'm smothering her when I try to talk to her for half an hour when I haven't seen her all day. I mean fair enough but she doesn't just say she doesn't want to talk, then when I do get to have a meaningful conversation she just says things to hurt my feelings. \n\nI've tried talking to her but she just says there's nothing going on. Things are a bit better now but what I have got out of her doesn't make sense. She once said, \"I feel like I have nobody to talk to and you never help me.\" \nThen ten minutes later it was, \"I just feel like you're smothering me.\" I explained that I can't help if she doesn't give me a chance to talk to her about it.\nWhat do I do from here? Could it be something to do with another boy? Is she just having a bad time?\n\nObviously there's allot more to it but this already feels long enough, hoping to get some help, thanks for your time.", "summary": "My girlfriend is/was acting weird and I don't know why, is she just fucked up because she's gong through a allot of stress?"}
{"id": "t3_54y9kk", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Asked her if she wanted a relationship and things seem to have taken a turn for the worse.", "post": "So I'm a male 28 and I have been on about 5 dates with her. On the 5th date right before we left each other I asked her what she was looking for out of this? \n\nShe said she didn't know and so I said I wouldn't mind being in a relationship with her because I like her and I didn't want to lose her and I feel like it had the opposite effect. It's been 2 weeks since this happened and she seems to be less responsive to my texts. I feel like bringing it up next time we talk on the phone. \n\nWhat should I say so that she feels comfortable with me again without her thinking I'm head over heels for her.", "summary": "Asked her what she wanted she said I don't know I replied I want a relationship and now she seems distant, how do I fix this?"}
{"id": "t3_3s7s1s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When I (19/M) think about asking girls out, I'm more afraid that they'll say yes", "post": "I know that I am holding myself back from having a nice relationship because I'm afraid that when I ask this girl out, she'll say yes.  Basically, I know that she likes me and I like her, but whenever I think about asking her out I convince myself not to.  I really don't like making small talk, so I'm worried that if/when she does say yes and we go out, it'll just be awkward.  \n\nI have felt this way my entire life, and as a result, I have never even been on a date or kissed a girl.  I know that girls have liked me and some have asked me out before, but the fear of having nothing to say is crippling.\n\nI know I shouldn't let this stand in my way!!  What can I do to avoid what I perceive is inevitable awkwardness if I go on a date?", "summary": "To paraphrase NFG- \"Did you notice I was afraid, I thought I'd run out of things to say\""}
{"id": "t3_37lrah", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 M] SO [23 F] ended things because I took Molly when I was drunk and persuaded/pressured to.", "post": "My SO and I have been seeing each other for about half a year. We've been having a shaky time recently, my grandfather passed away, car broke down. It has been stressful without adding her to it. At a party at her house her neighbor came over and he convinced me to take the Molly, I don't even have to pay him. \n\nI said no several times but he continued to insist so I said yeah, I had done it before what's the harm. \n\nI forgot that she had told me previously that weed is all that she's fine with. After two hours of consuming it I was relaxed and not being a disturbance, she comes up to me and tells me to gtfo and that I dug my own grave. \n\nI want to fix things and get back together but she seems to holding this as a grudge, so I don't want to confront her too much and piss her off.", "summary": "took a small amount of Molly at SO's party while really drunk forgot that she was against it, her wrath descended and I want her back"}
{"id": "t3_yaote", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "BF[21]and I [F22] don't see eye to eye. Should we be together?", "post": "BF[21]and I [F22] don't see eye to eye. Should we be together?\nWe've been together for eight months now we were friends for a year dated for 6 months, before making it official. \nSix months into our relationship he looks in my phone while I was in the shower. It just so happens that this week my ex texts me and tells me he's going to go into surgery because he has cancer. He wants to see me, I agree, considering it wasn't a horrible break up or anything, I figured he was just afraid and needed some reassurance. He said,I love you, I said it back. \nI know this wasn't a good idea. I do care about him but, i am not in love with him.  So my boyfriend reads this flips out, Says we need to break up. We break up for like four or five days, get back together for a week then out of no where he breaks up with me again. We get back together a week later.\nApparently he had a girl in his bed the night he broke up with me. \nHis roommates ex girlfriends friend, Get's wasted and falls asleep i his bed. Instead of sleeping on the couch, he sleeps beside her and she hugs him and kisses his back. That's all that happened according to him. \nThe roommates' ex girl friend set up the entire thing. She even gave my boyfriends number to the girl. He didn't even delete her phone number. Because he \"forgot\". That was two months ago. \nThis brings me to the situation today, He wants to go help the roommates ex girlfriend move.His other friend helped her moved and even said the girl that slept in his bed was there.  I told him I didn't want him too because of the entire situation and he should not want to because it literally hurts my feelings. He doesn't agree and thinks I'm completely over reacting. He's actually pissed off that i feel this way.", "summary": "My boyfriend wants to help someone move that is a total bitch and is mad at me for not wanting him to. Does he not care about my option on things? Should we just call it quits?"}
{"id": "t3_t61hw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Tips on controlling my over rambunctious jealousy?", "post": "I've recently started a relationship (I'm 22M she's 22F), and now that it's starting to get pretty serious I've started to have the problem that has helped end other relationships for me: that I'm being a little overly-jealous.\n\nWe spend the night apart for the first time in a couple weeks because her friend (another girl) was in town and stayed with my SO for the night.  I was of course totally cool with this, as it gave me a chance to play some discgolf with my buddy.  She even let me keep her car for the night (I've been driving it to work/school rather then driving the bus).  We planned that she would come over in the morning and hang out for a bit.\n\nSo this morning I woke up to her kissing me, everythings cool, but then she said she had to take her car and leave right away.  I was still half asleep but right after she left I was like wtf?  It really pissed me off, and I sent her a pretty harsh message over facebook (my phones currently dead).  Turns out she was going to breakfast with her friend, and they've been hanging out all day.  I feel really jealous that she gave up on our plans to hang out with her friend instead.  But I think I'm taking it too hard, because we're together every night and she should be able to hang out with her friend for a couple days.\n\nThis has happened in previous relationships, when plans change and my SO hangs out with other friends.", "summary": "I tend to get jealous when my SO hangs out with other friends, and am looking for tips on being a little more laid back."}
{"id": "t3_2c0mlp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(20M)In a long distance relationship of 4 yrs(20f)(311miles), might be extending it to 1800 miles. IDK WHAT TO DO?", "post": "Currently shes in school(austin). Shes got 2 more years in that city then she might be moving to Houston. Another 3 years. After that who knows where shell go! Ive talked to her about this many times to where the subject have become augmentative and tiring. \n\nShe doesnt know where shes going. She has family in Houston, where she thinks she could work & stay while going to finish up the 3 years. I dropped out of college after 1 year. I was 30 minutes away by bus. It was great then. Stuff happened that made me unable to continue. \n\nNow im stuck working a dead end job going to school part time in my home town. I dont want to stay here. Im currently living with my father, who also doesnt want to stay here. We recently took a trip to california, where hes from. And I kinda liked it. But recently a job opportunity opened up in Houston and were also planning on opening a business there. \n\nBUT I dont want to make this decision and regret say we dont make it through all this. Something happens. My gf and I started out since we were 16, ive been her only bf, ive been her everything. She has been my everything as well (IS). What frustrates me the most out of all this is that shes getting a whole lot of education to not able able to choose a city where to live. \n\nIDK what to do. A few more details, I visit here every month, the whoel trip costs me about $250 just saturday night & sunday, I drive back monday around 3am. I enjoy my time with her, but each day that were not together, we grow apart (I feel) , One major thing that has come up in the arguments so far is that she thinks her familys approval rating of me has fallen below acceptable since the drop out. Is there any advice yall can give a fellow redditor guy out in the big ol world?", "summary": "I cant decide whether to move closer to my gf potentially in the same city in 2 years, or leave to California."}
{"id": "t3_17dcub", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Should I file my taxes myself?", "post": "I know you guys must be sick of giving tax advice, but here is another question.  I want to know if I should pay someone to do my taxes, like H & R Block, or use the H & R Block online software, like I have done for the last two years.  It costs about $60, I think to file them using their software and I think it is around $150 - $200 or so to get it done at an actual H & R store.  \n\nI am a single mother, so I will be claiming head of household with one dependent, I have had two jobs this years, so I have two W2's, and I have to claim unemployment-and I had no taxes taken out of the unemployment.  I also have day care expenses to claim.  I also moved this year, but not more than fifty miles or for work (I know that matters with taxes).\n\nLast year, when I filed myself using the online software, my circumstances were pretty much the same (except no moving), so it isn't difficult for me to file them myself.  I just haven't gotten back a lot of money, which is fine, in a way, because I set up my taxes so I won't get a big return at the end of the year-because why give the government a free loan and all that. \n\nSo, do you think I should pay someone to file them for me (I wonder if I could somehow get a larger return), or is it not worth it and I am better off doing them on my own.  \n\nI'd like to add I am not stuck on H & R Block, I have just used them in the past.\n\nThank you for your time.", "summary": "should I file taxes using accounting software (which costs money, too) or should I pay someone to file them for me?"}
{"id": "t3_3yr56d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19 M] sister [26F] has cheated on her now fiance [24M] multiple times throughout their four year relationship.", "post": "Throw away because this disgusts me.\n\nIt's been going on for a while and I've always been on the fence about saying anything. I don't know what would be the right thing. should I tell him? I've always been on the verge of telling him, but there are some seriously fucked up factors in this and I've think it's getting worse.\n\nI'm not sure if she would be with him if it weren't for factors like housing and security giving how frequently she cheats and the fact that whenever she does something 'fun' without her children she never invites him. She has ignored him on multiple occasions besides that when he'd tried to figure out where she was.\n\nNow she's pregnant and the child might not even be his, but this would be what he thinks is his first child. My indirect involvement in this because I'm her brother makes me feel like shit. He gives her children love even though they aren't his and she cheats on him. When she had her second child and she wasn't sure who the father was he took responsibility. She could've just have not been with him. I feel as though she's using him and wasting his life away.", "summary": "My sister has cheated on her boyfriend(now fiance) all throughout their relationship and the conditions of their relationship are just getting more complicated as time passes. Should I remain impartial or say something?"}
{"id": "t3_4fx3lc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] 1 year, she wants to take a break", "post": "She has struggled with anxiety for a while and I've always been there for her, our anniversary was on the 4th of April and it was the happiest we've been in a while, weather was great and we spent the weekend together enjoying the sun and spending time together. She lives about 80 miles away because she goes to a university in a different town, but I drive and see her every week or two. It's only an hour and a half each way and I enjoy the drive.\n\nThen slightly after the weekend ended I was reading Perks of Being a Wallflower (a book she recommended and lent to me) and I realized that my sister had molested me when I was 6, somehow I had completely suppressed the memory. I told her and she tried to be there for me but with her anxiety it's hard for her. We basically just both would end up crying and freaking out. We both had a very tough week or two and I wasn't there for her at all when she needed me. \n\nI've come to terms with what happened to me, but she feels like I ignored her. She wants to take a break at least until the end of the summer where we don't talk. She said that she doesn't want to break up and she still loves me, but at the end of the break we need to talk about what is best for both of us, ideally that being that we get back together. The thought behind the break is that it'll give us some time to get better at relying on ourselves and not being dependent on eachother so that if the other person needs us we can actually help them without breaking down ourself.\n\nI'm not really sure how to feel about this or what to do, she wants me to come see her this weekend so we can talk about it and figure out what to do, any advice?", "summary": "Girlfriend wants to take a break until June so that we can get better at helping ourselves if the other person can't be there, what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_ewsbj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Does Reddit have \"power users\"?", "post": "Hey there Reddit!\n\nI exclusively surfed Digg for years. I never cared for Reddit much because, to be honest, I thought it was ugly. But I always had lots of problems with Digg. Mainly, the fact that I submitted countless links and was a big contributor but was never able to get anywhere close to the front page, even though much of the content I submitted was much better than some of the trash that ended up on the front page. Now, of course, Digg is a ghost town so that is how I ended up here, and I have to say I love this community way more than I ever loved Digg. I don't know why I didn't see that before.\n\nSo I guess", "summary": "Is there a point to posting links and such here or is it just like Digg where only select user's posts go anywhere?"}
{"id": "t3_362jr5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [19F] stop giving my boyfriend [20M] the silent treatment?", "post": "Dating 1.5 years. Did not have this problem before, only for the past few months. Had the same problem with my ex (but that was because I didn't care about him). \n\nI've read multiple threads on people being on the recieving end, and commenters saying that their SO is just doing it to be manipulative and gain control. \n\nI guess this is true? I don't really understand why I do it. Sometimes I just don't feel like talking to him, but want him to keep trying to talk to me. I'm sad when he doesn't. By 'silent treatment' I mean: not initiating, only answering his questions with one-word answers, etc. Not flat out ignoring (although it might as well be).\n\nI'm a bad communicator. Eg. I was supposed to go to his house this weekend. He told me that he had a lot of school work, so we would mostly be studying together (I'm okay with this, it happens a lot). I just told him I don't have to come if he doesn't want me to. He said \"I'd like for you to come, but I do have a lot of work to do. It's up to you. I'm totally happy for you to come if you want to anyways.\" And I do want to, but I guess I wanted him to convince me and make me feel more invited? He tried to talk to me a bit more after but I' still shutting him out. \n\nThis happens all the time. I realize that it is really childish, and immature, and ridiculous. I want to stop it, I just don't know how.", "summary": "I don't feel like talking to my bf sometimes, so I shut him out. How can I be a more mature communicator?"}
{"id": "t3_wedp3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "AT&T keeps sending my girlfriend faulty phones.  Either the phones restart constantly or never have service.  What can she do?", "post": "My girlfriend has the HTC Inspire.  She originally got one last summer that worked fine.  A few months ago the phone started to lose service frequently for hours at a time.  We took it to the store and they had replaced the SIM card.  It didn't help at all she kept having calls dropped, text messages unable to be sent and no service.  \n  \nWe called AT&T and had them replace the phone.  The first phone she received was DOA so they sent her another which had the same connectivity issues.  She sent that one back for a new one that had service but would restart a few times a day.  I told her to send that one back but she said it was fine as long as she had service.\n\nAbout a month later the phone starts doing the same as all the other ones,  no service.  She hasn't had any service at all for the past 3 days.  It isn't a problem with AT&T in her area because her family is on the same plan and everyone else has perfect service.\n\nShe just wants a phone that will have service.  I don't think her contract is up for another year but she can't go that long with a phone that isn't working.  Why should she have to pay them for not providing her with a working phone.  What can she do to guarantee she gets a working phone?", "summary": "Phone loses service for days,  replacement phones have same problem.  How do we get AT&T to give us a working phone?"}
{"id": "t3_amk6w", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I am thinking of severing all ties with my family, How would I do so?", "post": "I am thinking of severing all ties with my family, mostly because they are a bunch of self righteous christian people that feel as if by them paying for me so far, (feeding me and letting me live with them rent-free) I am not only their slave, but am expected to mindlessly agree with everything they say and do. They think that I am not capable of leading my own life, and I know for a fact that if they knew half the stuff I deal with/get up to in college they would throw me out. In addition, they get angry with me when I do what they ask because five minutes later they change their minds, and when I wait to see if they actually want it done they get even madder.  They show me no respect, and yet expect me to show them respect when their behavior merits none.\n\nSome info about me\nI am 20 years old\nI go to a state college, I am studying to be a teacher\nI am not really that into all the religious stuff, but I am not an atheist\nI work at my local YMCA as a swim instructor/lifeguard\n\nI am trying to think of ways that I could effectively cut the ties with them. At this point the best solution I have come up with is to join some branch of the military, such as the navy or something, because my job doesn't pay enough for me to move out on my own and continue my education. (when I am at school, things are sort of OK as I go far enough away that they don't visit, though they expect a phone call every day. They pay for my meal plan, so they expect me to be in contact with them)\n\nAlso, sorry about the poor writing quality of the post, but I felt like I had to write this down before I went crazy.", "summary": "I hate my family, and they hate me- how can I get away from them with no lines of communication open?"}
{"id": "t3_1xiqix", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[23/f] thinking about breaking up with [26/m] my boyfriend. Do you think everyone has someone they are \"meant to be with\"?", "post": "I met my boyfriend in college, we have been together 5 1/2 years. When we first met, I wasnt that attracted to him, honestly. But we got along and he treated me well so I stuck with him. We had fun in college and when we graduated things got more serious because, well, that was the obvious path when you've been together for 4 years. \n\nSo now we have been living together for a year and he talks about marriage. I used to think that we are supposed to be together. We get along so well and our beliefs about life are very much in line with each other. But I'm just not, excited, about our relationship or a life together. I feel like we only got here because we never got in a fight big enough to break us up. It's not that I'm unhappy, I just really think I could be happier with someone else, as terrible as that sounds. But I'm worried that I'm making a mistake. What if I just happened to find my \"person\" early in life and I'm just bored? What if this is as happy as it gets and I have unrealistic expectations? I'm very comfortable. It would be easy for me to just marry him and be content. But I dont think I would be truly happy. Am I stupid for thinking I can find passionate love? \n\nI've talked to him about this some and I think he does feel that passionate love for me, but I have been honest with him that I don't feel like that with him. I told him that he deserves to be with someone who feels the same way about him, but he still doesnt want me to leave. He thinks he can make me feel that way for him. I dont want to break his heart but I think I am hurting him more by staying with him...", "summary": "comfortable and compatible with bf of 5 1/2 years, am I being selfish for not wanting to settle for \"comfortable?\""}
{"id": "t3_2odbzd", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Benefits from Self-Identification for stuttering", "post": "My employer recently sent out a volunteer \"Self-Identification\" survey and I have not previously identified as someone with disabilities. I read the survey and realized I don't need any special accommodations to do my job (at least currently) and further don't receive any current accommodation. \n\nIs there any benefit to identifying in my position now, even though I don't require any accommodations currently? In addition, are there any disadvantages to identifying, ie can it be held against me, or what privacy rights do I have if I identify, but then say I don't require any accommodations to do my job? My current job has some client facing work, but to ever \"advance\" in my career, I can't really say no to these assignments, even if I move away from this kind of work later. \n\nA little bit of background; In my past years I was a very bad stutter, but with proper therapy I've worked past it. I was in therapy for all my childhood (until 18 basically). it doesn't heavily impact my life as I've learned proper coping mechanisms to help cope with working, and life. I still must sometimes stop, and reword what I am attempting to say. It ends up making some of the sentences I say a little awkward because of the word choice.", "summary": "What are the advantages/disadvantages do I get from self-identifying even if I don't require any current accomdations? "}
{"id": "t3_4iiofj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "3 years ago, my brother-in-laws [20/28] pitched in to buy a Bench Press. I'm[24/m] considering selling it. Do I need their permission? If so, am I required to give them a share?", "post": "By 'required' i mean like, is it something you guys think I *should* do? Are they entitled to it?\n\nSo yeah, 3 years ago I decided to buy a Bench. The total cost was $900 (local currency). Since my 2 brother in laws were going to use it as well, (it would've been really rude to buy it and tell them they couldn't touch it) I asked them if they could pitch in to help me buy it. They didn't have much at the time, so combined they only pitched in about $170. So I payed for the majority of the purchase.\n\nThat brings us to today. I was thinking about how I rarely use the Bench since I have a gym membership. It's just taking up space. However, my 2 brothers still use it. One of them uses it regularly. But I feel that since it's mostly mine, I should be able to at least decide IF i can sell it.\n\nAssuming i do sell it, are they entitled to a share of what I get? I was thinking of selling for around $500-600. If so, how much would be appropriate for me to give them, considering they paid a fraction of what I did for the bench?\n\nThanks!", "summary": "I paid $730 out of $900 for a bench. Want to sell it. Do I owe my brothers any of what i get for it? How much?"}
{"id": "t3_15ibod", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [17/M] like a [16/F], she is unsure she can handle a relationship. What should I do?", "post": ":Beware this is a WALL of text:\nSo, I have been flirting and hanging out with a girl for quite sometime now (about 2 months). We talk all the time and never run out of things to do. We've also been on a few dates and had what I thought to have been a great time for both of us.\nIt is also well known by all our friends that we both like each other and just aren't in a relationship yet.\nNow here's where I need your help: she sent me a text a few days ago explaining how she doesn't think she can handle a relationship between all the things she does in her life, she is in a local circus, an actor for a Shakespeare Troop, an extremely good student, and is in the Chamber Orchestra for our school.  She just doesn't think that she could be in a relationship at the same time. Not that she doesn't like me because she does, she just has a bit much on her plate.\nI answered back being all understanding and \"it's ok\" because I wasn't very sure what to say it all came as quite the shock.\nShould I try and do something about this, should I do anything? Or is this a lost cause?", "summary": "Girl likes me, I like her. But she is unsure If she can handle a relationship with all the other things she does in life, what should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_36b3cg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26F] boyfriend [27M] of 2.5 years doesn't have sex with me but masterbates everyday.", "post": "My boyfriend and I used to have sex every day, multiple times a day. It was literally the best sex I've ever had and he told me he felt the same way. Of course after a while it didn't happen as often but often enough that I was always pretty satisfied. \nWe've been living together for a year and were still sleeping together a few times a week but it became monotonous and boring. It was literally always from behind and only lasted a few minutes. Its now gotten to a point where we are only sleeping together about once every two weeks, always first thing when we wake up, always from behind. \n\nI thought maybe he just wasn't feeling very sexual (we recently moved into a new house and finances are pretty tight) so I never spoke to him about it. However, he told me a couple of weeks ago he masterbates every day. I told him the fact he prefers jerking off by himself rather than actually sleep with me is really starting to affect my self esteem and he assured me he thinks I'm beautiful and sexy and there's nothing wrong with masterbasting. I started feeling so low about myself I even posted on AmIUgly recently! \n\nJust today I told him I had to run to the store to pick up something really quick and I was only gone for about 15 minutes. I walked into our bedroom when I got home and there was a \"dirty\" shirt on the floor. I asked about it and he told me he masterbated as soon as I left. I just walked out of the room and am now sitting outside posting this.\nI know I should talk to him about it again but after nothing really changed the first time I tried I'm hesitant to bring it up a second time. Everything else in our relationship is amazing and wonderful and he's my best friend but this is really starting to make me feel insecure and bad about myself. I don't even like changing in front of him anymore.", "summary": "boyfriend of almost three years doesn't have sex with me but assures me nothing is wrong even though he masterbates everyday."}
{"id": "t3_1ltlya", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Back up your data, seriously", "post": "Hi, I'm a web designer/computer repair technician and I consider myself a pretty tech savvy person; I'm also an ignorant moron. Here's my story.\n \nSo for years my co-workers and my friends have been telling me to back up my shit. But I was too cheap to shell out the dough for a back up drive. \"I won't make mistakes, only a complete idiot would delete his hard drive! ha ha!\" is what I would often say to myself. So today, I was trying to extend a partition on my 3TB data drive because I had some unallocated space left on it. But instead of clicking \"Extend\", I, in all my wisdom, clicked on delete. A warning message popped up and I thought it was just the \"are you sure you want to proceed?\" message so I pressed yes without reading it.\n \nNeedless to say, the 3TB of freshly free'd space hit me like a ton of bricks. That drive was filled to the brim with every photography work I ever did and all the templates, scripts, programs I ever wrote. I've got a client that I'm suppose to deliver a product to by tomorrow and now I'll have to call him up and tell him that we're both fucked.\n \nRunning Reccuva right now to see what I can recover. So far it's found 154050 out of what feels like millions of files on there. It also says it will take about another 6 hours to complete the scan.", "summary": "Back your shit up. Accidents are called accidents for a reason. It WILL happen to you soon or later, so have a copy of your important data to prevent it from screwing up your life."}
{"id": "t3_2tooqw", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "My cat who usually couldn't care less about me has now declared my bed as his.", "post": "I'll try to keep it short. I have 3 fur babies, 2 white ones who are from the same litter and 1 black one from a different shelter, but all adopted at the same time. I love them all so so very much and they all get a long great. We all moved back to my parents house about 5 years ago and it took adjusting for them, but now they rule the place of course :] with that, they all picked their favorite spots in the house. My little black cat (Elbee)is my mushiest (only with me though) and he sleeps in my bed every night. The one white cat, Batman, favors my living room daybed and is my t.v companion. Now the other white one, Lt. Peabody Fuzzybottom, he became my dad's shadow and best friend, he hung out upstairs w. Them all the time. I'd really only see him for morning feeding time. He follows him around like a dog! Ok so, the weirdness, I just bought a new comforter and he loves it, he's on my bed all the time now, he's throwing off our whole house groove! My dad jokes about how I must have brainwashed him, but I can tell he misses his little bud. And Elbee is all out of sorts b.c our sleep space is different. Anyone ever had a situation like this, is it just b.c it's a new blanket, New smells? Any advice?", "summary": "got a new comforter, one of my cats who I don't see often has taken a liking to it, throwing off the whole household! (Ok, that's a bit dramatic, but my dad misses his little buddy!)"}
{"id": "t3_tt2hp", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "3 months now...", "post": "m20, she f20\n\nBroken up for 3 months now.  We dated a total of ~6 months of the past year (big break in the middle somewhere)\n\nLife isn't getting any better.  I've come here before for advice, and I've read plenty, time heals it all... I just feel like things are getting worse.  I accidentally think of every day at some point, and always think of before I [finally] go to sleep.  It's gotten to the point where I'm suffering from self-diagnosed depression.  It probably goes deeper than a relationship, but she definitely is the biggest trigger and catalyst for my depressive mood.  It should be noted that I've gone to a psychiatrist recently and she determined I am not severely depressed.", "summary": "If it's my anxieties of us breaking up and missing her have been getting worse... am I doing something wrong in coping with this?"}
{"id": "t3_48vpmy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25 M] GF [22 F] of a year has generalized anxiety disorder, and it makes me feel like I'm highly pressuring her every time I try to be sexy.", "post": "My girlfriend has been my best friend for 8 years. We started dating when we ended up in the same town again after three years apart, and the friend/relationship side of things has gone really well.\n\nShe was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder at a young age, and has dealt with that, along with an eating disorder stemming from the anxiety and her mother and grandmother generally constantly telling her that her worth is in her beauty, (along with the normal patriarchal stuff telling women that, of course).\n\nI have loved her for a long time, and when we started dating, our sex life was pretty normal, exciting, and we had a really good time. Now, in the last three months, we've had sex four times, and barely messed around more than that. We've also stopped in the middle of sex every time because she got anxious or uncomfortable, or just made it very clear without saying it that she was.\n\nShe tells me that she wants to sleep with me, that she is attracted to me, but I'm terrified that she's with me for our relationship, but just isn't interested in sex with me, but is too anxious to tell me, for fear that I won't be able to handle it. \n\nWe've talked about this many times over the last few months, and now I feel like any time I try to do something sexy, or grab her when we lay down to sleep or touch her sensually, that she's just going to put up with me being close because she doesn't want to hurt my feelings. Please help me, I need advice, fam.", "summary": "GF with anxiety disorder isn't feeling sexy with me no matter what I try, and I'm losing all my confidence. Am I wrong to think this is a big deal?"}
{"id": "t3_4of9r4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend (25F) said she got scared when I (25M) got very angry (not at her). Reddit, do I have anger issues that I need to deal with?", "post": "Basically we both made a careless mistake that cost us $300. I went from perfectly happy to very upset and angry in the span of 2 seconds. It was collectively both of our faults and I made it very clear that I was not angry at her. I slammed my fist against an inanimate object and yelled a bunch of \"fucks!!!!\" for a few minutes, and then stewed in total frustration for the next half hour. She became visibly disturbed and scared of me. I could tell pretty quickly by how carefully she chose her words, and afterwards she told me her concern when I had cooled off. $300 loss isn't a huge deal for us, but the stupidity of the mistake is what really frustrated me. \n\nReddit, I do not ever want her to be scared of me. What can I do to maybe take things less seriously and reassure her that this type of anger is never going to be directed at her?", "summary": "got supper pissed off at a situation. Gf became disturbed by it and scared of me. Never want her to feel scared of me again."}
{"id": "t3_3469xm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [35/F] with my __bf_ [35 M] less than a year and I've never been so unhappy with someone", "post": "Short and to the point:\nHe's a great guy to other women in his life but me. He flirts with co-workers (even ask them to meet up for a drink, goes wine tasting with them, fixes things around their homes etc)\n\nI don't think he's getting too far with these girls but I think he's hoping.\nHonestly, I don't know what his deal is. All I do know is that they aren't his gf, I am but I'm not getting the perks those girls seem to get from him.\nI asked him to help me with somethings around my house and it was like pulling teeth. He got my hopes up about us going on a romantic vacation and after 2 months he has not purchased the tickets but has excuse after excuse. \nOur 1st big vacation together and he downgrades to \"Lets go camping an hour away over a weekend instead.\"\n\nI'm heartbroken, disappointed, and so my question \nWhy ask a girl to be your gf and tell her you love her (never felt this way about anyone yada yada yada) but treat her the way I'm being treated??\n\nI'm unhappy and feeling like I'm going to call it quits any day now.\nI tried before and he was really upset. He tells me he Loves me but his empty promises (still waiting on that trip and home repairs in my bathroom) just hurt and make me upset.", "summary": "BF treats other women in his life better than his gf. Let's me down. Acts oblivious and it hurts. Why does he do this?"}
{"id": "t3_18eyrj", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by crop dusting my office, and when our boss walked in, I blamed it on a female coworker.", "post": "Well, this morning, for breakfast I had the typical: Omelet, hash browns, pancakes... \n\nWell, every time I eat those damn eggs, I tend to get really gaseous. I'm not talking typical farts, I mean those dreadful silent vomit inducing farts that are similar to those you get when you eat protein shakes or supplements.\n\nWell, I come back from the chow hall and start my work day. Well, I have to get up and grab something from across the room, and I can just feel my stomach rumbling...\n\nI get up, start walking, and I suddenly just can't hold it in anymore. I let out a silent fart. But you know, I can't just stand in one place and fart, since everyone there is going to look at me and wonder why the hell I'm standing there. So, I decide to walk quickly across the room, grab what I need, and walk back.\n\nA few seconds after I sit down back at my desk, my boss walks in. And as soon as he walks in, he can just smell it. He just stops, and has this look of pure pain in his face... \n\nHe quietly says to himself \"Who the F*ck just farted? It smells like god damn death.\" Since he's close to my desk, in an effort to protect my own ass, I say to him in a low voice \"Well sir, I think it was Jennifer over there...\" \n\nJust then he looks over at her, with this look of pure hate, and she looks back with a confused look on her face wondering what she did... I knew then I was safe. Unfortunately, he called her out on it, a few of the other workers bust out laughing, and its safe to say I fractured a coworkers friendship, since the boss said that I told him it was her...", "summary": "I had eggs for breakfast, couldn't hold my fart in, let loose a nasty crop dust, and when my boss came in, blamed it on my coworker..."}
{"id": "t3_3p5f0d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] disappointed my girlfriend [19F] of 6/mos by saying I didn't want to go to a haunted house", "post": "For the past few week my girlfriend has been wanting to go to a haunted house. She has asked my multiple times and I had curved the question by jokingly saying \"Yeah, only if someone holds my hand.\" And I even said that I'm not really into scary things.\n\nThe truth is that I have trouble coping with large amounts of anxiety and I barely even watch scary movies because of it.\n\nSo about a week ago I said I would go to a haunted house, at my girlfriend's request. Today, the day we were supposed to go, I told her I was nervous and I didn't know if I wanted to go. I told her I wouldn't enjoy the experience because of my anxiety, but I would still go if she wanted to. \n\nMy girlfriend seemed to take me confiding in her more as me letting her down than anything else. She started talking about how I should have said no to begin with, and why did I wait until the last minute to say I would be uncomfortable. \n\nI apologized and said if you really want to go, I will still go, but it just might not be enjoyable for me. She just shut down after this and is continuing to focus on me letting her down. \n\nI then suggested that we should still go out and do something, even if she wants to stay in because I wouldn't be comfortable at the haunted house. She initially rejected my suggestion, but eventually said, \"You plan what we'll do then. I just wanted to do something that we couldn't do any other time of the year. Where could we even go out to dinner that we haven't already been.\" (This is not verbatim, but just the gist of what she said)\n\nI understand I could have communicated more directly when she first brought up the haunted houses a few weeks ago. I take responsibility for that.  \n\nMy question is: What do I do now that my girlfriend is so disappointed that it almost seems like she's depressed? How do I make this into a good night, or is that not possible anymore?\n\nAny additional feedback unrelated to my primary questions is appreciated as well.  Thank you!", "summary": "gf is disappointed that I don't want to go to haunted house we planned to go. How do I make her feel better?"}
{"id": "t3_2u48iy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] with my girlfriend [19F] of 3 months. Situation with her best friend [20sM]", "post": "Hello.\n\nA few months ago my ex girlfriend broke up with me because she fell for another guys, which left me with a lot of insecurities and trust issues.\nI trusted this girl with my life, and she lied to me about feeling anything for him, which really hurt me.\n\nFast forward to 3 months ago, I started dating this amazing girl, which also had broke up with her ex a few months back.\nWe really hit it off and everything happened really fast between us, but all was great.\n\n1 week ago she went with a female friend to Rome, and came back today, and since the airport is near where her best friend now lives, and since they haven't seen each other in a while (they have been best friends for a few years now), she decided to spend a day there, stay the night (sleeping in separate places, ofc) and come back the next day.\n\nI was not really ok with this, and even with all my trust issues, since I didn't want any of it to ruin our relationship, I trusted her with it.\nHer best friend told her she could sleep in her bed, and he would on the couch, but since I was not ok with her sleeping in some other guys bed, I asked her to stay on the couch, and she agreed with it.\nIt still bothered me that her answer wasn't \"no\" from the start, since I'm pretty sure she wouldn't like me sleeping in some other girl's bed, and in my point of view, that's just no right.\n\nMy question is: Am I having the right attitude, that a good boyfriend would have? Or am I being too condescending?\nI really don't know how far is this situation ok in a relationship, but since I don't want to be controlling, I trusted her.", "summary": "Girlfriend went to spend a day (and stay the night) at her male best friend's house, who lives far from where we live."}
{"id": "t3_3t7suf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] keep getting made fun of by my \"friends\" [16-18 M] For being liberal", "post": "I will try to keep this short as I am not a very talented writer (or speller)\nSo recently we did a \"political spectrum quiz\" in my Gov. class to see what side of the spectrum we fell in, and of course, I was scored far left. I have always known I was very liberal, and had no problem sharing my opinions on issues, but with my friends it never really came up.\n\nI was shocked to see that they all scored FAR right, as I just always thought they were liberal. I have no problem with people that are conservative, but they seemed to have a huge problem with me.\n\nNow, its always \"God damn liberal\" or \"Go support the gays more F****\"\nHow can i get them off my back without them making fun of me even more?", "summary": "Never knew my friends were extremely conservative, They found out I am far left, whenever I see them at school they mock me"}
{"id": "t3_3ezwsh", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "My boyfriend is having trouble finding a job.", "post": "Background: So my boyfriend graduated last summer from Law School. He did really well, he was on law review and finished in the top 10% of his class. The school he went to isn't on the top 100 list of law schools but it still has a good reputation. His schools rules when he attended didn't let students intern at private practices and make the connections they would need to have a job after graduation, his internship was with the navy.\n\nThe problem is he's applied for hundreds of jobs, and he either doesn't get called back or gets super close then they find someone with more experience. I'm starting to worry about him. He's still sweet to me and we're doing well. But he's becoming more and more dejected as time goes on and I'm starting to get worried. I don't know what to do or how to help him. He's such hard worker so I think its a major blow to his confidence to not have a job. What can I do to help him?", "summary": "My boyfriend went to law school and I need advice on how to help/ best support him until he can get a job and I welcome suggestions on how or what he should do to find one."}
{"id": "t3_164b57", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by wearing ladies underwear [24m]", "post": "So I was visiting my friend out of of town for the weekend and everything was awesome except the fact I forgot to bring clean underwear. So, no big deal I just wear the same pair since I had JUST changed them so it was all good. However, after a weekend of drinking and partying needless to say I needed to changed by the time the weekend was done. \n\nSo when I finally got home to my family I decided to hop in the shower. When I got out and dried off I realized I had no boxer's clean whatsoever (wife forgot to do laundry apparently =P) and I HATE going commando, can't do it. So I looked in the dresser and all I see is my wife's underwear. We're about the same waist so I figured fuck it. I reluctantly put the panties on and went about my day (all in the while constantly tugging at my junk due to the tightness of the underwear. \n\nFast Forward 6 or 7 hours at around 7pm: I had (sadly) gotten accustomed to the underwear (forgetting completely I was wearing them) and my friend calls me to go hang out for a bit. So I do. At least 15 people were there (most I knew but 5 or 6 I didn't). We start scrapping as we often do (Fighting MMA style for fun) and of course I fall down at one point and get back up to keep fighting but everyone is just staring at me. First looks of disbelief, followed by confusion and finally mass hilarity. EVERYONE was laughing so hard it wasn't even funny. I had COMPLETELY forgot about the panties. Tried to explain my case but doesn't matter. 2 Days later I have a few new nicknames. No one wants to hang out and I am completely embarassed.", "summary": "No clean underwear so wore wife's panties. Forgot they were on and went fighting. Fell down showing I was wearing ladies underwear to every friend I have plus people I didn't know. My \"reputation\" is gone."}
{"id": "t3_2ececc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21/m] 8 months with my s/o [22/f], can't help feeling neglected and seeking company", "post": "To start off, I have never cheated or dumped someone. I like to think of myself as an ethical person that would never do something like that ^^^since ^^^its ^^^happened ^^^to ^^^me ^^^a ^^^LOT\n\nMy relationship has been good thus far with no real complaints on my part. However with the summer months --that I've been looking forward to since I met her in the middle of our god-awful winter -- I've been feeling like we both aren't as excited to see each other or make plans... My schedule is flexible and with **no job** and **no school** she really has few reasons she can't hang out.\n\nYet, we simply don't see each other, often for as long as 2 weeks sometime. I'm feeling more and more like she's just a girlfriend on the weekend and a text buddy for the remainder. I'm almost always the one who takes the initiative to make plans, and it's starting to frustrate me and causing me to feel neglected.\n\nTo make things more complicated, I've been growing closer with a friend [f/21] who is more aligned with my interests, seems to have a good sense of where she's going in life, and has always been a source of astounding conversation since I've known her. Last night we hung out until the wee hours of the morning, opening up on very personal subjects and then sharing a bed that night (zero funny business).\n\nThis is the worst thing I've ***ever*** thought I'd say but I almost feel like I'm dating the wrong person. I feel disgusted with my own thoughts of leaving my girlfriend to jump ship to someone else. I am at a loss and it's eating me away inside.", "summary": "I'm 9 months into a relationship where I feel neglected, but it could just be my brain telling me to date my close friend instead. Thanks for reading."}
{"id": "t3_15ne1a", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, how do you deal with interactions with people far less educated than yourself?", "post": "Allow me to clarify in the least-douchey way possible:  \nI'm the first person in my family to go to college and I'm pretty smart. All of my life I've been really good at smiling and nodding when someone sounds like an idiot because it's really none of my business to go around correcting people, that's a dick move. For some reason, though, it's been getting harder and harder to let people continue speaking without trying to correct them. For example, today my grandma was trying to convince me that eating one mushroom and half an onion each day would completely stop any cancer growth. (She saw it on some TV \"doctor\" show.) On Christmas I found out that people still exist that don't believe we ever landed on the moon.  \n  \nIt makes me feel like a terrible elitist asshole to correct grandma by saying, \"You know that isn't really proven? There's been no peer reviewed studies supporting it... Don't trust the TV 'doctors' please.\" How do you handle situations like this? Is it more polite to let my ignorant relatives continue to be ignorant?", "summary": "I'm uncomfortable correcting uneducated relatives when they sound like lunatics, but also uncomfortable with them sounding like lunatics. What would Reddit do?"}
{"id": "t3_3y5cg0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19m] need help with someone bugging my 23[f] girlfriend", "post": "we've been together for 6 months, things have been nice. ups and downs, but it's great. we spend a lot of time together, treat each other right, but i'm new to this and i need some help.\n\nwe broke up for about 8 days, and in that time she gave a guy her phone number over the internet. she swears that they've never met or hungout, but he started calling her and talking to her a lot, and even lied about emergencies to get her to answer his calls. he's been bugging her from what i understand. \n\nfast forward to now when we're back together, 2 nights ago she sent him a very long message telling him to leave her alone and he started trying to talk to her again.\n\nshould i be mad? my instinct is to get his number and call him and settle this. she is upset because she thinks im raging, but she blocked his number today and i want to call and let him know he doesnt need to talk to her anymore, she doesnt want him to.\n\nplease help, i dont want to sabotage this relationship by reacting wrong, what would you guys do? she just blocked his number and said we'll see where it goes from here.", "summary": "stranger from facebook keeps calling and texting my girlfriend when she has told him to stop. she just blocked his number, i'm stressed on how to handle it."}
{"id": "t3_1ef8oh", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "[20/F] is there a chance or should I just move on from the ex [22/M]?", "post": "We have been together for a little over four years, and we consider each other very close, so this breakup is hard for me, especially because this is my first break-up. I have gotten to know his friends, family, and we are and have been a part of each other's life for a while now. We have decided to stay friends for now, but even that is tough. I asked him if there is a chance, and he says there is, and we would 'most likely' get back together.\n\nThe reason for the break-up was that I was stuck in my ways, I did not show him that I could change and get over my jealousy (of his accomplishments, not like flirting with other women) and fixing my own problems instead of having him fix them for me. I was unaware of how much I had worn him down by my ranting and such.\n\nAt the moment, he doesn't believe that I can change, but if/when I show him that I can change and can be happy, he says he will reconsider (and once again, 'most likely' getting back together). Since he will be out of town for a while this summer, I have decided to utilize the time to try and figure out myself and obtain happiness and possibly trying again when he comes back. I have told him this, too, and he is aware that I still have feelings for him and would like to try again.", "summary": "? stubborn and i won't change my ways, after four years of dating and being close to my ex, i'm wondering if there is a chance or being back together."}
{"id": "t3_1symhi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [23m] feeling guilty about being upset about girlfriend's [24] past", "post": "I've been dating this girl now for about 9 months, and it has been going great. She's the first girl I've been with that I am completely happy with, and we have an amazing amount in common.\n\nHowever, I'm slowly finding out about her past, and I am letting it get to me. We make it a point to never talk about past relationships/flings, because it is not important, only the future is. I knew she had had a few boyfriends in the past, but never heard anything else. A couple months after we started dating, I kept hearing from mutual friends about her \"crazy\" past, and how wild she used to be. I never wanted to hear more, so I just tuned it out and didn't worry about it.\n\nThe other day I was at a large house party, and she was visiting some family before she got there, so she wasn't present yet and I didn't know very many people. I was in the kitchen and two guys were talking about her, and I made the foolish decision to hang around and listen (they didn't know I was dating her). Apparently she was like the one night stand queen, and had slept with a bunch of guys the past few years. Eventually another girl came up and joined in and said something along the lines of \"yeah, I've heard she's been with over 50 guys!\". Thats when I finally realized I didn't want to hear any more and got out of the room.\n\nI know I shouldn't let it get to me, but it really is :( \nI think part of it is that I'm not one for casual sex, and have only been with girlfriends in the past. I view sex as a very emotional thing, and it makes me think that she doesn't by hearing things like this. I know it is so foolish to think about this too much, because we really are perfect together, and she has never given me a reason not to trust her.\n\nWhat can I do to not worry about this? I feel really bad for letting it get to me, and I want to make sure I don't ruin things by being distant and distraught about it.\nThanks everyone!", "summary": "Found out that girlfriend has been with over 50 guys, and had a wild past. I'm letting it get to me even though I know I shouldn't"}
{"id": "t3_26hfcp", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by shitting in my Ex-GF's bidet", "post": "So, back in 2010 I lived In Shanghai, China, and while I was there, I've made a bunch of friends, and a girlfriend, as well. \n\nWe had been dating for around two months when she invited me to meet her family, with a traditional dinner. I really loved her, and I was so excited, that after eating, my stomach groaned.\n\nOh shit.\n\nI asked her father politely if I could use the bathroom. I hurried myself there, and because I was so excited about being there, I accidentally confused the toilet with the bidet.\n\nAbout three minutes after taking the shit, I realized I had shit in the bidet.\n\nOh shit.\n\nMy heart stopped as they asked me if I was alright. \"Sure\" I said, knowing some kind of ninja would kill me if they found the shit. Suddently, my brain had an idea: Get out through the window.\n\nSo, after falling out of the window(thanks god it was a house), I ran away to my house. From there, I went to Shanghai's airport and bought a ticket to Macau, where my friend resides.\n\nAfter a week, I called her and appologized. She was O.K. with it, and we kept dating until 2012, when we stopped.", "summary": "Went to my GF's house, shitted in the bidet and fleed to Macau so her family wouldn't kill me ;)"}
{"id": "t3_zmrue", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Are three more majors and three more minors unreasonable at my age?", "post": "I'm 27, I have a BS in philosophy and a minor in psych. I've gone back to school for Ms/bs combined civil engineering. However, now that I'm back I want to keep collecting degrees. I've put it into my head that I'd like to get degrees in civil engineering, chemistry and math with minors in architectural design, nuclear engineering and astronomy. I figure I could be done with it all by 30 or 31, but then I'm not entering the workforce or further grad school until 32, and not done with grad school or have relevant work experience until 35. There is also the matter of paying for it all..... Any redditors out there get a bunch of degrees that has something to say, positive or negative about the consequences of your choices.", "summary": "If you went to school for untraditional amount of time or into an untraditional age, I would like to hear your story and what you'd have done differently."}
{"id": "t3_41zw9v", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Account showed up in collections? Advice please!", "post": "So to make a long story short I made a myriad of financial mistakes when I was younger and instead of fixing my problems I hid from them and wallowed in depression. Over the course of the past 3 years I have fixed almost all of these mistakes and taken care of my depression through therapy and am trying to get on track to have a healthy and successful financial future. \n\nSo about a month ago I get an alert from Credit Karma of a new debt reporting on my credit and my score (which isn't great to begin with) takes a huge hit. I immediately go about checking my credit report. I see a new account labeled as being in collections for about 6k. I freak out for a little and then calm down and begin to investigate. \n\nSo it's seems that this account is collections for a private loan I took out when I was in college. Now, I did not realize I had taken out a private loan, all my other loans were through the federal government, but I was drunk a lot at that time in life as a depressed 22 year old and it's fully possible I went with a private lender to cover some of my school expenses. I look further at this account. It was already on my credit report as a delinquent account from Education Finance Partners. I looked them up and all I could find was that they apparently filed Chapter 7 at some point in the 2000s. This new collection account seems to be that same loan. However, the old loan was reported delinquent in 2008. It's been over 7 years. How can this new company report me as delinquent as of 2015? Any advice on what to do about this?", "summary": "Old loan last reported in 2008 is showing up as a fresh collection account with a new agency. Are they re-aging the account? Is this legal?"}
{"id": "t3_3g65a3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "19M wondering how to break up with my with my 20F girlfriend. 7 months total, 2 months long distance", "post": "I know that it's time my girlfriend and I break up. I can't give her the attention/emotion she deserves or wants and I feel like I'm wasting her time by being with her. I really like her, and breaking up with her is going to break me and I know that but I really honestly and truly believe we need to break up. \n\nI digress, we both go to the same college together but our home towns are 3.5 hours apart. She was planning on driving up to visit me for a week on Sunday and I was going to break up with her while she was visiting. \n\nI didn't choose this to be cruel. I thought that she would rather hear it in person than over the telephone. When I told my mom my plans she was infuriated with me because it was \"cold\" of me to have her drive all this way to be broken up with and then have to drive home sad and alone. \n\nShould I call her and do it tomorrow or wait for her to visit?", "summary": "Long-distance relationship and I want to break up. She's visiting on Sunday. Should I break up tomorrow via phone or let her come visit so I can do it in person?"}
{"id": "t3_19dlfn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Was that a Freudian slip?? 25m/37f", "post": "This morning while laying in bed with my boyfriend [25m] of 4 1/2 months he thanked me for coming over and said \"it's always nice to sleep with somebody.\" Quickly adding \"you\" to the statement. Uh, SOMEBODY?! Was that a Freudian slip?? This is my fear...he works with a lot of younger girls and 2 months ago he was caught talking online with a 23f as if he was single, yet he says all the time how they're all kids and \"fell hard\" for me. We are actually about to move into a house together! I love him SO much! He's an amazing, intelligent, respectful, supportive, loving, extremely mature man. I am just nervous sometimes bcz I [37f] don't appear my age and am not good with dating. Now i have a 1 year old baby too; which my boyfriend is such a good role model for in every way! Am I over reacting or was it a Freudian slip and there could be trouble ahead?", "summary": "We're moving in together, I have a baby, I'm still nervous and reading into things...or is there more?"}
{"id": "t3_54x2jp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my favorite bar/restaurant - I made a mess in the bathroom.", "post": "This is dumb, and it might not be the best place for this question but I want to know how to handle this. I would like to make this situation right with the restaurant staff and I just feel awful. \n\nI went out to a bar last night with my husband and had a few drinks and skipped dinner (read as: I got too drunk). Before we left I went to use the restroom but the lights were off and I couldn't find the toilet so I peed in what I think was the garbage. D: \n\nI did not remember this until this morning when my husband mentioned I spent a long time in the bathroom. I can't tell him what I did, I am too embarrassed. \n\nAhhhh! I'm so mortified! They probably know it was me because we were the last ones to leave. Should I mail them an apology and cash, and never ever return?", "summary": "Drunk me peed in a garbage can at a restaurant/bar! I want to apologize but I don't want them to know it was me!"}
{"id": "t3_1qv19e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21F) am really worried about my roommate, who has OCD (19M)", "post": "Hi guys, I'm a huge fan of this subreddit and I'm hoping you'll have some advice.\n\nI (21F) currently live with my boyfriend (21M), his brother (19M), and a mutual friend (25M). \n\nMy boyfriend's brother (R) and I are pretty close. We're very similar and have kind of bonded over all kinds of things. I'm also very tight with the rest of my boyfriend's family. We have been dating for over four years.\n\nBefore R moved in with us, my boyfriend and I were concerned that his OCD was flaring up again. He has had OCD since he was 11 or so, and has gone through periods of doing really well, and doing really poorly. We both talked to him about it and said that we weren't sure that he was ready to move out and encouraged him to get professional help to ease the transition from living with his parents to living on his own.\n\nWell, he didn't do anything, and now I think he's getting worse. He washes his hands multiple times an hour, and he completely freaks out if we touch of any of his things. He has an aversion to my boyfriend's computer, that he has now gotten rid of, and now he's refusing to touch anything that might have touched the computer. \n\nHe is extremely childlike and is constantly asking us for reassurance about EVERY LITTLE THING. I am starting to lose my cool, to be honest. It's extremely exhausting and I don't know how to deal with it anymore. I don't know if I'm enabling his OCD or exacerbating it with every little action, and I feel like I'm walking on eggshells all the time. I don't know what to do to help him. I'd really appreciate any advice. \n\nHe will NOT seek professional help. We're working on that. Specifically, I'm looking for things that my boyfriend and I should or can do to help him out. I don't want to enable his behaviours but I don't want to upset him or make things worse, either.", "summary": "Roommate has OCD, we're worried about him but exhausted of dealing with it. Not sure how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_4eer5a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[20M] not sure how to feel about second serious relationship", "post": "Title explains it well enough. I broke up with my ex about a year and a half ago, I'm over her, and very much in love with my current girlfriend. After my ex I went on a bit of a spree, seeing a couple of girls, none of which I developed feelings for, although they did for me. I did \"try\" to see if I just wasn't realizing that I had feelings for them, but honestly there was no chemistry. I enjoyed that for a while because I was enjoying someone's company (hanging out, having sex) without the fear or going through the pain I did prior in my first relationship. I know now that the spree was a bit childish, and I regret continuing with those girls although I didn't feel anything, but I've definitely grown, and it's brought me to a relationship where I'm feeling feelings I've never felt - I'm so relieved I actually am feeling these things again, and in even greater magnitude. \n\nMy issue is this; my first relationship, I wasn't scared of living through the end of it because I didn't know what heartbreak was, I had no context and thus no fear of an end. Currently, I'm so very much in love, I have a consistent fear of reliving the pain that I did in the past when my last relationship ended, and even more so because given how in love I am currently, I'm afraid the sadness of the heartbreak will also be greater in magnitude as well.\n\nIs this normal? I know i'm being too much of a pessimist, I really don't think this relationship is going to end anytime soon, but I too frequently think in worst case scenario", "summary": "how do I get rid of this fear of this eventual impending doom when the impending doom is honestly no where in sight?"}
{"id": "t3_47e93a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 F] with my short lived fling [25 F], does \"maybe in the future\" ever really work out?", "post": "I'll try to be brief. \n\nI met a girl. We got to know each other a bit. We dated intensely for a week. I was falling HARD, and way too fast... it felt disproportionate to how well we knew each other. I just felt this connection. Then we had a somewhat serious conversation wherein it was determined that I was not ready for anything - dating or a relationship - because of baggage from a previous (terrible) breakup/4.5 year relationship. She felt at this point I would bring drama into her life. I honestly change my mind all the time about what I want and am still dealing with shit personally. I'm not in a good place to be with someone.\n\nBasically I over reacted after this conversation, sent her a lot of emotional text messages... We talked again and she was all like \"I'm not rejecting you, just where you are in life\", there were tears. I feel rejected still. She greatly imply/outright said that we could happen in the future when I'm more ready to date. It seemed sincere. She wants to be friends but I've determined that I just can't do that and have asked for us to not be in contact for a bit.\n\nBUT:\n\nMy question is... was she just being nice (if misguided)? Does this ever really happen or is it just wishful thinking? Either way I'm going to try to just get over it/her and focus on myself. However, part of me - because of this great connection - doesn't want to kill all hope. At the same time I think holding onto that hope even a little bit might impede my personal growth.", "summary": "If - due to bad timing or whatever - someone says they think it might work out in the future, do they mean it? Is it just wishful thinking? Does it ever work out in the future?"}
{"id": "t3_y4krk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I am very scared to tell someone that I like that I am religious, How do I approach it? How do you approach your differences?", "post": "I go to school for Microbiology paired with Biophysics, many of my classmates are either atheist or agnostic so I call myself agnostic for the sake of avoiding an argument. I wasn't really expecting to enjoy a persons company, but I do and now I'm stuck in between a rock and a hard place. He invited me to join the Atheist for Science (not the real name but let me keep the anonymity) group in school and now I have no idea how I should tell him that I am.... religious.\n\nNormally I wouldn't have a problem with it, but there are other things involved such as my race, I am Afro-Caribbean and he's Asian so his parents.....hate me. Totally racist. So I am scared that if I bring on this bombshell he'll stop talking to me and our very flirty Star Craft Two moments will end. \n\nReddit how should I approach it? How do you all approach it? \nIf curious I could also post my reasons for being religious in the comments.  Thanks in advanced.", "summary": "He's Atheist I'm not, He's Asian and I'm Black. He doesn't know I'm religious. "}
{"id": "t3_lftnl", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is the oddest thing you have ever found in a public place? I'll start.", "post": "About a year ago I was in a local Shell gas station with my mom. Upon entering the bathroom I saw a suitcase stuffed into the trashcan. Curiosity strikes and I take the suitcase from the I find nothing, but a single flash drive. At this point I felt like James fucking Bond, or someone that has stumbled upon a secret treasure. I take the flash drive with me and pop it into the ol' laptop. I open it only to find a spread sheet of a local bar's monthly revenue along with other files like their employees names, addresses and other personal information of employees. I call the local bar and tell them what happened. They hand the phone to a manager and I eventually end up talking to the GM and he explains that someone had broken in the previous night and had stolen the suitcase which originally held several other documents along with the flash drive. Because the bar was just a short bike ride I rode down there and returned the drive. They thanked me and I went on my way. So Reddit what's the strangest thing you've found in a public place.", "summary": "I found a flash drive in a suitcase in a public bathroom. Someone had stolen it and I returned it back to the bar that it belonged to."}
{"id": "t3_4gw1w0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(22M) Fights with my gf (24F) of a year are hell. Is this worth it?", "post": "I've been dating this girl about a year now, and we have a ton in common and usually get along great.  We said we love each other fairly early on and she spends pretty much every night at my place.\n\nBut our fights are awful and I feel like I'm the only one who honestly tries to change.\n\nIt usually begins with her flipping out about something small, like not texting her back soon enough, or a little joke that she didn't like.  Then I try to defend myself and it spirals out from there.\n\nWe don't call names or hit each other or anything like that, but she usually ends up yelling at me (admittedly, sometimes I yell back), and just talking us in circles.  I usually feel awful because she ends up crying, and then I apologize.\n\nAfter the fights, she'll pretty much refuse to talk to me for a day or two, and if she does it's in one word sentences and never smiles or laughs or acts like she's anything other than miserable.\n\nAny apologies I do get are usually yelled at me or said with the most sarcastic tone possible.  (\"I'm sorry I'm such a bitch\" is bordering on platinum status now.)\n\nWhen I try to talk to her about how she fights, she always says I'm blaming everything on her, or I'm trying to tell her how to feel and it spirals into another huge fight.\n\nAnyone else have a SO that turns super mean, petty when they fight?  Is this just a tradeoff I should learn to deal with and be glad I found someone I love when they're happy?", "summary": "Gf is really mean, uncompromising when we fight.  Not sure if I should just put up with it or not."}
{"id": "t3_2z8hg1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Update] me (24f) just dumped by my boyfriend of 4 Months ish (26m)", "post": "original \n\nBarely anyone saw the other but on the off chance anyone was curious. Turns out he actually broke up with me because he met someone else (also 24f). She spent the night at his house the very next night and they went on the exact date we had planned. I know this because of course she posted pictures of it on social media. I went ahead and dectivared my accts where I could but am having a hard time not checking compulsively in other ways. \n\nAll I can think about is them having sex, her sleeping on my side of the bed, wearing his t shirts that I've worn so many times, playing with his dog... It's freezing here and all I can picture is them cuddling cozily in his house while it snows outside. My imagination is my number one enemy right now. \n\n any comfort I took from thinking he ws being honest and respectful because he cared  about me  is all gone. He was just straight lying.. \n\nBasically I want to throw myself off of a bridge.\n\nHappy Monday!", "summary": "Bf actually left me to date other girl within 12 hours of us breaking up, everything is worse and I hate myself right now"}
{"id": "t3_31p8ki", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] asked to donate kidney to uncle [47M].", "post": "Hey Reddit, throwaway obviously. Now, this is probably boring as there's not much drama but today my uncle came over to buy my spare bikes for his kids (they're in great shape) and he brought it to mine and my mother's attention that his kidneys are at 20% (him and my mother are both diabetics). \n\nNow, my mother was not a diabetic when I was born and I'm incredibly healthy with a fantastic diet and exercise regimen. I don't drink (I've had maybe 2 small drinks since turning 21 in December; I'm not a fan of the taste of alcohol), smoke, have done no drugs.\n\nSo naturally they both turn to me and my mother asks me if I would be willing to go in for tests to see if I'm a kidney match. We also have the same blood type.\n\nI'm honestly just at a loss for words.\n\nI'm not the closest to my uncle but we are still on great terms.\n\nAlso some background. My mother is the oldest of three, the middle child (her brother), passed away in 2010 from kidney failure, and the youngest is the one asking for the kidney. Both of the brothers were born with diabetes, my mother didn't get diabetes until she was 34, while pregnant with my sister (but my sister is not a diabetic, she is 17). I'm like the star health child.\n\nSo, I naturally would like to say yes but I'm terrified of anesthesia and surgery and have no idea how to come about this. \n\nIf any of you know any one who has donated a kidney or you've donated one yourself, I would love some insight.", "summary": "Uncle has 20% of his kidneys working. I am incredibly healthy and have the same blood type. I was asked to donate."}
{"id": "t3_1dtf48", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "My cat went crazy!", "post": "I have two cats, [Tiny Dinosaur & Elmira] They're both very well-behaved indoor cats, and Tiny (as we call him) is especially friendly and affectionate.  He will walk up to complete strangers and beg for a petting.     \nUntil now, he has never had a problem with seeing another cat outside.  He takes an interest but usually just watches at the window until the visitor goes away. This past weekend, a new neighborhood cat started stalking around our yard. Tiny Flipped out! He went completely berserk, got confused (I assume) and savagely attacked Elmira.  In the photo (linked above) you can see the size difference, she's half his weight, he backed her into a corner & was all claws & teeth on her.  I pulled him off before any serious damage was cause (mouthful of fur was all he got), and quartered him in the bathroom until they both calmed down (she was very shaken up; terrified!)     \nThe following night, I woke up at 4:00am to the sound of him going berserk again. I went to make sure he wasn't hurting Elmira (she got away in time), and he turned on me & shredded my leg up real nastily (blood everywhere!)     \nEven as I was cleaning my cuts & dressing the wounds, Tiny had not only come back to normal, but actually seemed \"remorseful;\" slowly approaching me with his head down, timidly nudging me to pet him, slowly backing away when I cursed at him (I was in pain!) and generally being as non-threatening as possible.", "summary": "How do you keep a suddenly madly territorial cat who turns on his housemates, from hurting anyone when his zone is threatened (by strangers which he can't reach)? Why would he suddenly develop this berserker-rage tendency?"}
{"id": "t3_2c5fx4", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Accident May 28, as of July 30 still no settlement or repair quote from insurance", "post": "My husband was in an accident May 28th. He was not at fault because the driver he hit made an improper left turn causing my husband to basically T-Bone the guy causing damage to the front passenger's side of his car. He has full coverage and Financial Responsibility (SR22) insurance because we are financing the vehicle. The other party was cited for an improper left turn, no insurance (minimum cov. insurance is required in IL), and driving on a suspended license. We filed the  claim the day after the accident online. A week later they mailed us the claim paperwork to fill out. One week after, they asked him to take the car to their approved auto body shop to have their adjuster look at the car. We persistently called about when the repairs would be done or quotes for repair and every time we would be thrown into a full mailbox and no one that actually answered would help or give us any information. The auto body tells us they are just waiting on the insurance company to approve starting the repairs. A month after the accident they asked us to send them a copy of the bill of sale and a history report of claims with his prior insurance (from which he had no claims.) Over two weeks ago they called my husband to say they are investigating the claim because he is married and I wasn't under the policy. The broker that signed us up asked us if we wanted to add me on and we declined to save money (Im under 25) and because I wouldn't be driving the car at all. So in two months, countless letters, and maybe 4 calls from them we have no car, no repairs, or even a repair quote. We don't have any money at all because to make matters worse my car was hit a week after his resulting in a total loss and a payout from my insurance. We used up all our \"rainy day\" savings to buy me a new car while waiting for my insurance to pay. We don't know what else to do other than hire a lawyer. Please help!", "summary": "My husband's insurance keeps delaying repairs/settlement on an accident claim at which he was not at fault and he is fully covered."}
{"id": "t3_36fnou", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Local college security repeatedly harasses our residence, despite not going to the school. Options to make it stop? (North Chicagoland)", "post": "My roommates and I have rented a house about 3 blocks away from a local college, and it was previously used for parties by the previous renters about 2 years ago. We were unaware there was a college nearby before renting the property. Being college-aged, we often have our friends over to drink or hang out (we are all 21), but we either go to community colleges 20 minutes away or live here for work convenience. We have had no actual police of the town knock on our door, nor any noise complaints, but the campus security comes to our house and suspects we are throwing a party and housing underage-drinking even though none of our friends attend the college. Is there any way to make the school stop harassing our private residence? This has happened 5 times in the past 6 weeks and we are planning to rent it for the next couple of years.", "summary": "Campus security to a college we do not go to has been harassing us about parties we are not throwing for students we do not associate with. How do we stop this?"}
{"id": "t3_qsvjy", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Need student loan / 401k advice (xpost frugal)", "post": "So my wife and I are about 4 years out of college, we have about $23k in loans still to pay. About $7k of that has an interest rate of 6.2ish% then rest is under 3%.\nWe also have about $14k in retirement...with our cash we have a net worth of about $3k. I feel comfortable knowing we're on the positive side but I feel like we might be mismanaging our debt. Wife is the only one working right now so I probably wouldn't feel real comfortable using a large sum of our cash.\nI'm looking for some advice, should we use our retirement money at all to pay off some debt or is that a bad idea? Also, since I'm unemployed is there a smarter way to invest my 401k money that's just sitting there? Is there anything we can do with our loans to lower the interest? I've never had any kind of professional advice, I feel like I'm just winging it.\n\nThanks guys :)", "summary": "$3k net worth with $23k in student loan debt and $14k in 401k. Am I mismanaging my debt?"}
{"id": "t3_2lyn7u", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by \"calling dibs\" on a coworker.", "post": "Background: I'm extremely shy and awkward when it comes to girls. I'm 20, she's 18.\n\nSo this isn't a one day fuck up. Happened over a few days, but I just learned about it last night. I work at a small chain grocery store in the produce department. I had been on medical leave for the last two months because I had broken my finger at school. I went back to work last night for the first time since my injury. Anyway, there's this pretty attractive girl who was a bagger that got transferred to work back in the salad bar, which is in the same room as produce. I learned of this while I was on leave. I was actually excited to get back to work. I jokingly texted one of my male coworkers \"I call dibs on the new girl\". Bad idea. That information slowly made its way around the store. It wouldn't be so bad if she didn't know, but she does. Another salad bar girl asked me about it last night and told me what she knew. I've had my differences with another employee in a different department and we are no longer friends. Turns out he has some beef with me. I don't know the exact words he told her, but whatever he said made her think I'm a creep. Fuck. everyone in the entire store knows I'm into this girl, including her, and now she thinks I'm a creep. I work 8 hours with her on Saturday. I'm fucked.", "summary": "Jokingly told a coworker I called dibs on a new girl at work. He told another person and it spread throughout the entire store. She found out and now she thinks I'm a creep."}
{"id": "t3_guj57", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Considering restarting school...?", "post": "Hey Reddit,\nI have a problem.  Basically, I am thinking of going back to school.  I'm 23years old and have already graduated from a 3yr program (Computer Programmer Analyst program, got me an adv.diploma.  I'm in Canada, this came from a college.  It's roughly equivalent to a bachelors...  I said roughly).\n\nMy issue is, I don't really know what to go back for =/  Like, I have ideas but I can't see any practical use out of them.  For example, I would love to go back for theological studies (World religions to be specific, I just love religion and the history and mytho) but I can't think of anything I could do with this other than become a teacher... Which is fine, but...  That's the best I can come up with as an outcome.  I'd be interested in doing journalism but...  There's already a bunch of journalists and all that... Media studies essentially I guess...  But again, I don't know really what I could do with that stuff...\n\nThere's other things I'm interested in, but I just can't figure shit out, so help me reddit!", "summary": "Realized I don't like what I'm doing. Want to go back to school, don't know what for.  I am also a giraffe"}
{"id": "t3_11scje", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My client [77 F] is openly racist/bigoted.  How do I [30 F] handle this?", "post": "I am a caregiver and one of the women I care for is openly racist.  I began helping \"Rose\" and her husband \"Dan\" for 6 months.  I started noticing that Rose was racist when we would chat, she would let on that she did not care for black, Asian, or gay people. These are the groups that I know of, anyway.  Also, my sister is gay so it really hurt me when she said 'Oh I HATE that woman, she is gay' when referring to Ellen Degeneres.\n\nWhat's worse, we were taking a walk today and we walked past a black woman. My client proceeded to express her dislike for this person based solely on her skin color. I was appalled. I did not know what to say, so I just said \"Hmm.\"\n\nHow do I handle this? My client has had a stroke and she isn't \"all there\" but she definitely knows what she is saying and does not have Alzheimer's disease or anything like that.", "summary": "Caregiving client (with stroke history) of 6 months [77 F] is openly racist. This really bothers me [30 F]. What is the best course of action?"}
{"id": "t3_4xjlai", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Deciding on a maid of honor or just having 4 equal bridesmaids?", "post": "I am planning to ask 4 close friends to be my bridesmaids. I have gone back and forth about having a maid of honor or not. I do not technically have a \"best friend\". \n\nThe friend who I was thinking of asking is my oldest friend (since kindergarten) and due to distance we only see each other around one time per year. She has other friends that she considers to be her \"best friends\" but she really understands me and we always have so much fun together. We talk via text a few times a month and skype every once in a while. I know she considers me a close friend too even if not her best friend.\n\nDue to distance I don't expect her to help with preparations (only what she would like to/ is able to). A family friend is already planning a shower. If I was picking one of my bridesmaids to give a toast at the wedding I know that I would want it to be her.\n\nIs it weird to ask someone to be your maid of honor who is closer with other people than they are with you? Has anyone who didn't select a maid of honor had any issues with that? Any suggestions?", "summary": "don't have an official best friend, but was thinking of asking my oldest friend who I also consider my closest friend, or I could have no MOH and just 4 equal bridesmaids."}
{"id": "t3_3y8p1y", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "My best friends girlfriend just broke up with him. I need help to be a better friend for him tomorrow.", "post": "SO the story goes that I have had this sinking feeling that my best friends girlfriend was going to breakup with him for a while. sincing this I told him over and over that if she ever hurt him to just call me and I would be their for him. We spent tonight texting, and he is coming over tomorrow night, so we can talk. \n\nI told him some stuff about when I went through something like this. I told him that I am their for him, and that everything's gonna work out. I didn't lie to him though see his girlfriend said she wanted some space. So he is going to give her two weeks and try and contact her again after that. See what can be salvaged kind of thing. This is almost a mirror of what happened  to me. \n\nI told my friend that its going to be hard, that the waiting was, and is going to be the worst part. I also reminded him that I would be their for him during the waiting. During this moment of pain in his life. \n\nWhat I need advice on is what else can I tell my heart broken friend who is truly in pain right now. I just want to be their for him, to comfort him as best I can. Please help me, any advice I would greatly appreciate thank you all very much. \n\n**Context** We are both in our twenty's. He is a straight (although I have my thoughts) male who has been dating our mutual friends sister for something like one and a half to two years. I am a MTF closeted (to everyone him included) pansexual who has been in love with him for like five years. This isn't about me though so my feelings need not be involved. Just added for transparency.", "summary": "My best friends girlfriend of two years said she wanted space. I am trying to be the best friend I can be for my friend in his hour of need."}
{"id": "t3_okng6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Can't Stop Feeling Insecure - Why?", "post": "Hi everyone,\n\nI've been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now, and we're pretty serious. We've moved in together and we are generally very happy and very cute together! We have issues, but he really means a lot to me.\n\nThe problem is that every once in a while I become severely insecure and paranoid of his past relationships with other woman. He's done everything he can to help me feel better, but I keep  shooting everything he says down in fear of getting hurt. He tells me that our relationship means 1000 times more than anything, the sex before me was terrible, and he would gladly erase his memory to only include me in his life... but it just isn't enough, and I am scared that this behaviour is getting out of control.\n\nCan anyone offer me some advice? \n\nA couple of the things that I tell him in response is:\n\n- If it means 1000 times more than something, there is still a comparison to make\n- Why did you hang on to each relationship? \n- Why even have sex if it was so terrible? \n\nI realize now that if I can't get rid of these feelings, it will continue to bring me down, and thus the relationship. I want to live in the present and be happy with everything now... But what is it that is tying me to these insecurities? I am willing to listen, and to follow through with any advice so long as it isn't \"get over it\" or \"just be happy\". I am trying to understand myself and by extension these feelings so that I can better combat any negative feelings in the future.", "summary": "I am insecure of my boyfriend's previous relationships when I have no real reason to be. Looking for understanding and advice. "}
{"id": "t3_1n7nvm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "(M20) not sure if (F19) sees me the same way", "post": "So recently a girl who I like has been asking to hang out and have coffee/lunch with me the past few weeks.  I am almost certain she knows I like her as more than a friend and it feels like there is something between us when we are together.\n\nI have very little experience with girls so didn't know if I am just picking up on friendly behaviour or if her asking to hang out alone with me meant anything more?  Like I said, I am fairly sure she knows I like her, I try show my interest with flirting etc but haven't asked her out since I worry I have misread the situation.  I feel like she wouldn't ask to hang out alone if she wasn't a little bit interested as she knows I like her.\n\nSo I was just looking for a second opinion on whether this was a sign of interest before I think about asking her out.", "summary": "Girl I like has been asking to hang out alone with me after college and go for coffee/lunch together, is she just being friendly or is it something more?"}
{"id": "t3_rsakm", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Am I thinking straight, or should I just I cut my losses and move on?", "post": "My girlfriend (24/f) and I (25/m) had been in a relationship for 1.5 years, but just recently split. Up until about two months ago, things had been going pretty well, but then things took a turn for the worse. We broke up last week.\n\nI got laid off from my job about 3 months ago, and have been unemployed ever since. Needless to say, it had a significant impact on our relationship. My days consisted of searching for jobs, playing video games, and occasional outings with friends. I'll be the first to admit that my life had no-direction at all.\n\nShe has been working two jobs while simultaneously attending school. She was definitely more stressed out, and was having a hard time coping with it. We've been living together in a small studio apartment, which contributed to a lot of her stress as well; she felt as though she didn't get enough personal space.\n\nOur breaking point was an argument about money. I had fallen behind on rent , so she was carrying more of the burden. In so many words, it ended in me moving out in a flurry, and us later deciding that we both wanted to stop fighting. We broke it off.\n\nWe haven't really spoke after that, as I want to try and give her space that she needs. I've realized that my life has gotten a bit off track. That, in addition to her situation, seemed like a recipe for disaster.\n\nI know that it's been shorter than a week, but all I can do is think about her and our relationship. I understand that this is somewhat normal, but I deeply feel as though this is the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. Despite our problems, we've made it through a lot and I've never been happier in my life than when I'm with her. I'd like to have her back in my life, but it's clear that we might need some time to sort things out.", "summary": "GF(24) and I(25) have split due to her job/school obligations and stress, my unemployment and money issues. I'm still in love with her."}
{"id": "t3_3fjzcl", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20M] completely mindfucked by this girl's texting behavior [19F] after our 48hr relationship ended with \"I'm not ready for a relationship\".", "post": "Background: met this girl on tinder, went out with her for 2 months. Things felt \"relationship-y\" for a few weeks before I asked her to make things official. She said yes. Lasted for 48 hours before she said she wasn't ready for a relationship and just wanted to be friends. I respected her decision and was happy to keep in touch with her and continue hanging out casually. \n\nEver since we \"broke up\" (can you even call it that?) this girl has been a complete fucking enigma. Every so often she'll text me something like \"hey :)\", or she'll tell me about something exciting that just happened to her or something. Cool! Normal stuff. She wants to keep in touch! Only trouble is that when I respond to her she acts FUCKING WEIRD. She'll give me lame, one word responses, or just not respond at all. Then I'll come back the next day and text her something, and I'll get similar lame ass responses. This cycle has been repeating for 2 weeks and I'm so confused.\n\nWhy bother initiating conversation at all if you don't want to actually talk? I don't get it. Can you guys offer some theories? I can't even begin to understand what's happening here.", "summary": "Got shot down, she just wanted to be friends, and now she just drops me random text messages and doesn't actually show any desire to keep a conversation going"}
{"id": "t3_2p8xou", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [23F] been having some intrusive thoughts related to a fetish. How to deal?", "post": "I have a fetish that involves watching an everyday activity. This activity is not remotely sexual for most people and is something they often do socially. It's impossible to avoid entirely. \n\nOccasionally when I'm around family members and they're doing this activity, I'll feel a small bit of arousal coupled with A LOT of anxiety. I find myself wishing I had headphones on so I could look away and ignore the activity altogether - but that would be rude in a social setting and could draw attention to me. I feel panicked, suffocated, trapped and unable to talk out of shame. A couple of times I've quickly made an excuse and fled the room. Other times I've been irritable and rude, unable to focus on anything that's going on. Still other times I've been distracted enough not to be worried by it, or just not bothered by it at all. It's hard to predict when it's going to upset me.\n\nIt's only recently that I've started to feel so panicked about this (I used to deflect it by thinking about my boyfriend doing the activity instead, but he's now an ex and I can't really do that). It's nowhere near OCD level, but I don't want it to get worse. Any advice on how to manage this situation?", "summary": "I sometimes get extremely anxious when I have to be around family members as they perform an everyday activity that I happen to have a fetish for."}
{"id": "t3_hfz4w", "subreddit": "self", "title": "My girlfriend's 13 year old brother is having his 3rd surgery in 2 months.", "post": "specialist in Utah to correct this. Aleks was put into traction for about three days to help stretch out his spine so they had enough room to open the back of his head to fix everything. Surgery went better than expected. He was brought home a few weeks ago and seemed to be doing well, despite losing a lot of his motor skills due to the invasive surgery.\n\nAbout two weeks ago he had an MRI to check on his progress. Sadly this showed that the surgery did not work as well as originally thought. Aleks needed to go back to Utah.\n\nHe arrived in Salt Lake City this past Sunday and had surgery number 2 on Monday. This one went well and was not as invasive as the first (they were able to clean things up working through his nose). Yesterday they did an X-Ray to follow up and again found they would need to go back in to clean up some more. As you could imagine, Aleks had a panic attack upon hearing this. The third surgery involves cutting open the roof of his mouth to better access the point of surgery.\n\nAleks is in surgery for a third time as I am writing this. I wish him nothing but the best of luck and a speedy recovery. He is going to have to go though months of physical therapy just to be able to speak and swallow properly again. This type of stuff should not be happening to a 13 year old kid.", "summary": "? My g/f's 13 year old brother is having some major surgery as I speak. Just wanted reddit to know what a champ he has been."}
{"id": "t3_5420w6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F18] am feeling insecure in my relationship with boyfriend [M18].", "post": "Hello! This is my first post on here so bear with me! I [F18] have been seeing my [M18] boyfriend for 3 years now. We have just started college together, at the same school. We do not live together, but do stay at each other's houses sometimes. We have always had an amazing relationship, hardly any fights, lots of laughs, and never any reason not to trust. My previous boyfriend did cheat on me, but this has never affected our relationship previously. \nLately, however, I have been getting jealous over the people he has been meeting/talking to. He has acquired some phone numbers from girls, just as friends, but it bothers me for some reason. Any time we don't get to talk or see each other for a little while I start to feel like he is going to break up with me. I just get extremely nervous that he's going to move on in college now that he's meeting all of these new women. The problem here is that he hasn't done anything to make me feel this way. He always reassures me, as we have a very communicative relationship I do tell him that I'm having these thoughts. I imagine that this is some type of insecurity on my part, but I've never had it before so I am wondering why it has happened and how to stop it. I am reaching out on here for some help to stop feeling this way, because it sucks for me and I know it will begin to annoy him eventually. I just don't know what to do. Please help, I am willing to hear anything! Thank you!! \nP.s. Yes, I know we are still young, but that doesn't mean we aren't in love. :)", "summary": "I am in a long term relationship. We just started college and I can't stop being insecure/jealous for no reason."}
{"id": "t3_4fuux6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[26F] BF[29M] of 2 years wants to go clubbing with his \"buddies\" who I recently watched acting like animals", "post": "Ive met these friends at gatherings before like birthdays and engagements, all was fine and I had no issue with my bf having a \"boys night out\" from time to time. I don't like clubbing myself and I know my bf doesn't dance but I thought it was his social activity. \n\nWell last month they were going clubbing as they normally do and I decided to tag along. The things I saw them do was terrifying. Some of these guys have girlfriends!. These are guys in their 30's and they were dry humping young girls who looked not much older than 16, Im guessing teenagers who just turned 18 were having too much alcohol to hold down. If the security guard didn't interfere I'm pretty sure 3 of the guys would end up having sex with the same girl on the dance floor or who knows they might of all joined in. \n\nThis wasn't a boys night out their main and only aim was trying to hook up with randoms, but it wasn't one on one type hook up. 2 or 3 of them would be making out with the same girl the other 2 would be humping really aggressively against another drunk young girl, I'm guessing they were trying to get some \"group activity\" going. \n\nI couldn't believe this was what they f*ing called \"boys night out\". Bf said \"yeah they get a little out of hand sometimes but they're not hurting anyone, its all consensual\" \n\nI started wondering what it is my bf does when I'm not around since he doesn't dance and his buddies are all busy trying to hookup with the same person. Does he just sit quietly in the corner and drink or does he join them ? \n\nHe has cheated on me before, he kissed a girl at one of his friends birthday party and I only found out through a mutual friend. We took a break and tried to rebuild trust and its been good. But now he wants to go clubbing this weekend with the \"boys\" again. \n\nI don't want him to go. Am I being controlling ? Do I have a right to ask him not to put himself in that situation.", "summary": "Bf's friends act like animals at clubs, bf goes out with them constantly,I no longer want him to go"}
{"id": "t3_20umk8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24,M] am so in love with my GF[24,F] of 8 months, but I'm having a hard time dealing with her lack of expressiveness.", "post": "Throw away since she knows my reddit account.\nBeen together for 8 months, almost 9. We're planning on living together. She's a great girl,and I'm sure I want to live with her.\n\nBUT.....\n\nThere's this situation where I write her letters, and make \"corny\" things for her (not sure if that's the term i'm looking for lol sorry, english is not my main language), write her very long and romantic texts, stuff like that.....Tell her everyday I love her, that she's beautiful etc... And although she says one onf the things she loves and makes her crazy about me is that, she does not do the same things.\n\nYeah, sometimes she surprises me with a card or some detail, but I'm at the point where, sometimes if I don't say \"I Love You\", she won't tell it. she also confessed me that it is very hard to her to express herself, and it's not only with me, all her life she was the same, but she thanks me because I'm helping her to develop that side.\n\nI want her to be more expressive, to tell me everyday that she loves me, misses me, I talked with her about this and she says she's making her best but I'm not seeing nor feeling a great step forward.\n\nI don't know what to do to stop making a big deal about this, but I really would love if she could be more expressive. Sometimes I think that maybe that's the way it should be but I don't know how to deal with it.\n\nWhat can I do?\n\nThanks in advance, /r/relationships!", "summary": "I am waaaay more expressive than my gf, this is like a big deal for me, don't know how to handle this situation. Please, help!"}
{"id": "t3_bahd2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Lost.. Am i really ready for a child..", "post": "Ive seen so many of these lately.. i hate to add my own.. but here goes.. \n\nI never subscribed to the notion that we have a soul mate out there.. And I still don't.. 8 months ago i meet a great girl.. 3 months ago we started going out.. 1 week ago we found out she was pregnant..  now before the usual conclusions are jumped too.. we were using protection (obviously not enough) condom slipped (or broke depending on when the actual time was) and we purchased the MAP (Morning After Pill) the next day..   We are both in our early 30s and she already has a Child from a previous relationship (She has sole custody and father has never been in child's life) hes now 7..  Shes not sure what she wants to do.. but we know we want to stay together..  Ive worked hard over the last 4 years to achieve a lot.. (house being built.. Car I've always wanted.. Bike I've always wanted.. )  I know in a why I'm being selfish.. but i don't think i want this child at this time.. (yes i would like to have one with her in the future) With this house being finished it would be tight to support her, her son and our new child..  and shes not sure she can come back from aborting this potential child.   I'm not looking for whats wrong or whats right as its different for everyone.. i just want to hear from others.. Point of view perhaps...", "summary": "New GF, We have a great relationship and can talk about everything. shes pregnant and leaning towards keeping it.. I'm decently successful and unsure i can afford it all.. Just entertaining thoughts.."}
{"id": "t3_19uk7t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (22m) need some advice about my current gf (20f) of 7 months :(", "post": "I'm at the end of my rope here and I could really use some advice on what to do. My girlfriend of 7 months is making me extremely unhappy and all talks to her about it pretty much end up with her telling me too, \"Stop being so emotional\".  It really hurts when she says stuff like that. Now I'm not a pussy, in fact I hardly ever share my emotions but it was her idea to start with that I \"express myself\". So it's like what the fuck, you wanted me to be more open and now you don't wanna hear about it? But there's more. She won't touch me, kiss me and barely ever hugs me unless I instigate it and all attempts of me doing any of the latter end up with her shirking away or telling me to quit it. Sex is non-existant now while it used to be uncontrollable in the beginning. Every time I try to start something she says it's creepy, I'm being gross, or she's not in the mood. It fucking hurts to hear your significant other tell you your fucking disgusting to her. I really don't know what happened. When the relationship first started she was all over me and now it seems like she gives two shits. What am I supposed to do? I thought about ending it but we JUST signed a lease for a new apartment so I can't just up and leave for awhile. \n\nNot only that but money is HUGE to her. I recently moved in with her after transferring from my store back home to this location so I'm fiscally wiped out. And yes I did warn her about me not having a lot of money. She told me not to worry about it :(. Yet she rubs it in my face ALL THE TIME that she pays the majority of rent and bills. She also uses it as an argument ender, which is why it's so hard for me to even talk to her about this stuff. Hell she treats the Goddamn dog better than me, even if he is super adorable.", "summary": "Girlfriend is a being a money grubbing bitch and all talks with her end up with me being called a pussy. Please help."}
{"id": "t3_15tsrc", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Girl [25] I've [M23] been dating for about 3 weeks just told me she's 6 months pregnant. I don't want to continue with her but I don't want to be an asshole about it.", "post": "Quick overview: met girl, got number, coffee date. On the date she mentions how she has 2 kids form her ex. I have no problem with kids, so while inconvenient, not a dealbreaker. We go on a couple more dates, start having sex. Yesterday (after hanging out a couple more times), she tells me, oh should've mentioned, I'm 6 months along (from a different guy); yes, somehow I missed this completely (if you knew me this probably wouldn't be a big surprise).\n\nDespite similar senses of humor and the fact that we both liked sex, I didn't really see this relationship going anywhere, and had pretty much told her so (specifically that I wasn't in for anything long term). She seemed ok with that. \n\nNow that I found out about this though, I'm sort of done. It's not the fact that she's pregnant that bothers me, but the fact that she'll soon have 3 kids, one a newborn, a full time job, and online school; I work two jobs and I don't feel like scheduling my life around her. So, basically, how can I break this off without coming off like a complete asshole.", "summary": "I'm bad at ending things like this, the fact that she's pregnant only complicates it. How do I end it gently?"}
{"id": "t3_3hmcmb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Parents [50M/F] advising me [21M] to stop lifting/gaining weight ''because it doesn't fit your body''", "post": "Hi! I hope I'm allowed to post this here, if else I'll move it to relationships.\n\nMy body type is ectomorphs, which is useful for long distant running and such. I used to weight 58.5KG, at a height of 183 CM. I've always wanted to try and gain a bit more kilos, but failed many times. I want to be able to take off my shirt at the beach, I want to be able to play soccer without flying away and all the other activities.\n\nTired of the skinny guy problems I decided to change by hitting the GYM and eating more. But now that change is finally starting to come to realization, my parents are slowly discouraging me to continue and are advising me to stop. I went from 58.5KG to 64.6KG in a few months, and I'm very proud of my result. But my parents believe that my weight should stay at 64.6KG, and not increase to around 75KG (my goal).\n\nThey believe that my knees and ankles won't be able to hold it out, and when I get old I won't be able to walk properly anymore. Another believe is that ''Lifting is damaging your body because you're an ectomorph'', which frustates me... because there are plenty of other ectomorphs out there and are doing fine, right? Another reasoning they told me is that, even though I work hard now it wont matter because when I turn older I wont have control of my body and I will suddenly get fat or skinny and thus making exercising now useless.\n\nAre my parents right, is excising really damaging my body and will I regret doing it in the future? Or are they still used to seeing the skinny skeleton me, and they don't like change, which is what I tend to believe more but I'm doubting myself.", "summary": "Parents say I'm damaging my body, my body doesn't fit fitness/working out. Are advising me to stop."}
{"id": "t3_2401xv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Seeking kind words of wisdom, girlfriend just broke up with me after a year.", "post": "So my girlfriend [F 26] and I [M 25] have been together for a year and today was our anniversary. The past two weeks we were both on each others backs about random crap, sorta a mutual stressed out sensitive mesh. \n\nLast night we talked on the phone about what we need to do/change to make things better and by the end of the night we've both found our peace and was ready for things to get better. But this morning, out of the blue, she dumps me saying \"I turned her into a terrible person\" and \"Everything you say hurts me.\" \n\nIn this relationship I invested all of my available time and money into her and she was able to give up all the good times we had together for a crummy 2 weeks. I don't feel too good right now Reddit so any type of comment is appreciated, I just feel alone.", "summary": "Serious Girlfriend dumped me and I feel alone so please comment anything (i.e. a joke, advice, support, your favorite pie, etc.)"}
{"id": "t3_19ftjz", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "(m23) got sort-of semi-friendzoned, not sure how to interpret situation.", "post": "So I met a very cool girl a couple weeks ago, asked her out, got two dates (Which went fantastic) and then got sort-of friendzoned.\n\nShe basically said that she's in an on-again-off-again relationship of 3 years with an ex boyfriend. He treats her like absolute shit, but I guess that's besides the point. She said she's not sure about dating, although she admitted to being attracted to me, and maybe considering dating me in the future. \n\nI told her I couldn't wait around for her and that I also couldn't just be friends. We decided to keep it friendly with the understanding that I'm still attracted to her, we're not going to hang out one-on-one anymore, and I'm going to pursue other women.\n\nSo I was quite distraught for a couple days (I had basically become deeply infatuated with her over the course of a week.), then I started calming down, got my groove back and nabbed three dates for this weekend. \n\nSo earlier today she texted me and asked what I was doing on the weekend. I told her I had some dates. She immediately seemed to get distant and cold, then admitted \"I'm a little jealous.\" In her words.\n\nI'm really hopeless when it comes to relationships and I'd love some help figuring this out. What is my best move here? I know I have three dates, but to be honest I'm still much more interested in her. She's a much higher caliber woman in every way than the dates I have lined up, and I have endless fun when I'm with her.\n\nWhat I DO know is that no matter what I'm going to go on my dates this weekend. What I'm not sure is how to deal with this girl. Even now that my infatuation has faded somewhat she remains one of the most beautiful, intelligent and interesting women I've ever met and I would be very glad to at least have the opportunity to date her and see how it works.\n\nI appreciate any comments and help in this matter.", "summary": "Asked girl out, got friendzoned, now girl is flirting more and jealous that I have more dates. Wat do?"}
{"id": "t3_1q4hb9", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "NSV - two of them! Yoga and sexy boots - all in the same day :)", "post": "I've been wanting to post one of these for so long since it's been a while since I could say I've had a significant SV.  Yesterday I went to a yoga class for the first time in about 3 years and it was great.  I felt strong and honestly I didn't feel like I looked that bad either.  Not great, but not bad.  I wasn't hating myself during the class so that's at least something.  Then by the evening I felt like crap about myself again.  The negative thinking started in and I was telling myself that going to yoga didn't really matter because it wasn't a very hard class and that there was really no point in my trying to look better because I was always going to be fat and ugly.  \n\nIn spite of all the bad things I was telling myself last night I decided to go to another yoga class again this morning.  This time it was a hard class.  I struggled through some of the more difficult poses but I still did it and while I certainly wasn't the best in the class, I wasn't struggling the most either.  \n\nThen after the class, because I was feeling pretty good about myself, I decided to go shopping.  While at the store I tried on a pair of knee high leather boots.  AND THEY FIT!  This may not sound like a big deal but in the past when I wanted to buy a pair of tall boots, I couldn't find any that were wide enough in the calf for me.  Believe it or not, this was the first time since just after high school when I was skinny and underweight that I've been able to put on a pair of boots like that.  Unfortunately I couldn't buy them because they were too expensive but who cares, the point is that my fat legs were not the reason I couldn't have them.", "summary": "I ignored all the bad things I've been thinking about myself and worked out anyway and I guess my legs are not as fucking huge as I thought."}
{"id": "t3_211gkj", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "Awoman I met hasn't responded to text since 4 days", "post": "The other day I met a woman who is about my age(18-19) and we instantly clicked with each other, I found out something that she liked and we spoke about that for a good amount of time. It turned out that she was taking a language course of a language that I speak fairly well, and she said something along the lines of \"you should help me because I have a test soon\". I got her phone number and sent her a text message a few hours later on in the day, sometime around 8:30 PM or so. The conversation is going nicely, she suddenly starts speaking in the language and things were going well. I decided to ask her (in the language) if she has free time the next day and that I can help her if she has some time. Now I haven't received a response since ~4 days, her Test has already passed. I thought that she was probably busy, but I remembered that she told me that she is sometimes socially anxious, so I think it could be her being too shy or something. The message mightve also been a bit difficult for her to understand, but I don't know. I don't think she is \"over\" me, since she seemed very nice and we had a good discussion earlier. My friend who was there for part of the time even told me that he thought she probably liked me(the way she looked at me, was interested as we spoke, etc) and she seemed happy in the texts(used some smiley faces, and was nice)\n\nSo now I am thinking about sending her a text today or tomorrow, asking how the test went, because I really enjoyed talking to her and want to get to know her better. But I am afraid I will come off as too \"needy\" or something. I don't see her until 2 days from now and it's not certain that I will. I am really not sure what to do, since I have been thinking about her this entire week, I just want to be able to talk to her a bit.", "summary": "Met a shy girl who seemed interested. texted her, suddenly she stops responding and now I wonder if I should text her or wait til I might see her. "}
{"id": "t3_2kbo2s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my 'Girlfriend'[00 f] She lives far away, should I stay with her?", "post": "Ok to start it off, I think she is honestly the most amazing person in the world and aside from this rather large 'bump' we fit together absolutely perfectly.\n\nWe met when I was looking to go to a university in New Zealand online, I had originally intended to go over there (I live in Britain) however could not afford it. We still hit it off and went from being friends - best friends - too waiting for eachother not only romantically, but sexually (I can still go over there maybe one or two times a year, with her coming over here once a year)\n\nBut the problem simply is the space between us, I'm thinking of moving over there in three years but not only is there the time between me being at university to coming over, but also that presents a whole host of problems with our families etc. \n\nI'm gonna be incredibly upset if I have to break things off, she is honestly the most brilliant person ever but can this really work?", "summary": "Me and a girl from different sides of the world are in love with each other, and I'm not sure if this will work."}
{"id": "t3_3svrc9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] and my GF [21 F] have been together for two weeks now, my second relationship, I don't like the insecurities...", "post": "Look, it's nothing too big. This is my second proper relationship. Right now, it's starting to be just like the first one I had. I love spending time with her, but as soon as the new week starts and we separate until Thursday/Friday, I start feeling this stupid insecurity again. I'm gonna assume most people know what I'm talking about, the thing that goes hand in hand with freshly having a crush on someone. \n\nAnyways, I'm just looking for ways to deal with it, to avoid it a little more because frankly, I don't like it. That's all. \n\nAlso I'm looking for ways to keep up a conversation via text message. Not looking to constantly text back and forth, but it would be nice not to have every attempt shipwreck after two or three messages.", "summary": "Looking for help with the anxieties and insecurities in a new relationship. You know, when we're not hanging out."}
{"id": "t3_29kx7q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [18/F] recently starting talking again to a guy she hooked up and it makes me [19/M] super uncomfortable.", "post": "**Background**\n\nLast week i had found out that my girlfriend started to talk to a guy that she had hooked up with in the past. This guy that  she had hooked up with is a complete dick. He was only using her to try to get with another girl and my girlfriend genuinely had feelings for him. \n\nMy girlfriend and I have been together for a year now and up to this point i have been feeling great about my relationship with her. She makes me very happy.\n**Problem**\n\nMy girlfriend recently started to talk to this guy, and very often. They are constantly texting, or at least whenever I'm with my girlfriend, i see his texts pop up on her phone. And this past Friday, they hung out together, and alone. This makes me very uncomfortable.\n\nDespite me telling her that i don't like her hanging out with him, she says that she is over the fact that he had used her and hurt her and that she now wants to be friends with him. \n\nMy girlfriend told me that she doesn't want me controlling what she can or can't do, but in my perspective I don't think I'm trying to control her. I just don't feel comfortable with her talking to this guy and hanging out with him. \n\nI feel that my girlfriend should understand that i hate the fact that she is hanging out with him and talking to him so often. It makes me question  my relationship. If she really has strong feelings for me, i feel that she should try to stop whatever it is that is making me feel uncomfortable, because if she felt uncomfortable I would try to solve the problem as quickly as possible.\n\nAny advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "My girlfriend refuses to stop talking to a guy she hooked up with, despite the fact that i have told her it makes me uncomfortable."}
{"id": "t3_4pwui8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do you leave your soulmate? Or how can you fix a relationship that feels broken? Me [23F] and my Soulmate [23 M]", "post": "I have been with my boyfriend (23) for the past 3 years and although it has been full of crazy ups and downs I love the guy with all of my heart. When we both met it really was love at first sight and I felt a wave of sparkles that I have never felt before take over my body and I knew deep down inside this guy is going to be the love of my life. Things were never easy from the start but we honestly got through it because I know he loves me and I love him too. He knows me better than I know myself, and he helped me become the better person I am today and I am so thankful for him. For the first year and a half I can honestly say I treated him horribly and did things to him that I never should have and I wish I could take it back but we all know that we can't do that in life. Why I did those things? I believe I've had a tough childhood and been in terrible relationships but he stuck through all the bad things and still treated me like a princess in the end, but no one can put up with the amount of issues I had given him it was seriously one of those deals where I was blessed with someone I felt like I didn't deserve. I wasn't always bad to him but I also wasn't the best gf I should've been. \n\nWe are currently still together but for the past year and a half we have been off and on and its driving me insane, it drives both of us insane, we have cheated on each other, said the worst things together and left when things got hard, but we always find our way back to each other and we just can't let each other go. I never do want things to end but its gotten to a point where I no longer can handle the pain of thinking we are done and then going back to each other and believing we can. Im just trying to look for some support or see if anyone has ever been in a situation kind of like miner", "summary": "My soulmate and I believe we are the ones for each other but it feels like our relationship is damaged? I need help!?"}
{"id": "t3_4ojbu3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 F] with my husband [33 M] is chewing tobacco behind my back and lying about it.", "post": "My husband and I have been together for 4 years. We are expecting a baby at the end of August. In the past, I have caught him lying about chewing tobacco, but never in the last year. I thought he was done with it. But recently, I was looking for nail clippers and looked in his grooming kit where I found a stash of it. I asked him about it and he told me he's been doing it a few times a day (some days not doing it at all though). He said he's trying to quit and wants to quit. He doesn't want our son that we're going to have to develop the habit. I told him to come talk to me whenever he feels a craving because I want to help him quit. \n\nBut this morning, I woke up and there was an empty pop bottle in the trash with chew residue in it. I'm not sure if I should ask him if he did it last night and see if he lies to me. \n\nI watched my grandmother go through lung cancer treatments and ultimately die from it. She was the closest family member I have and it's made me have a strong hate for tobacco. We live in a state where marijuana is legal and his job allows him to smoke. He's smoked weed for several years and I have absolutely no problem with it. But every time I think about tobacco and the harsh chemicals in it, and what it can do to a person, it really hurts me.\n\nMy friends say I'm overreacting. They say \"he could be doing worse.\" But I don't care. I don't like that I may one day have to see my husband go through treatments for cancer just like my grandma. It really hurts my heart and it's making me really stressed out. \n\nI don't know what the right thing to do is here... I know I can't control him. He knows how I feel about it but chooses to do it behind my back anyway. I don't know what the right thing is and I'm feeling really lost and hurt right now. So any advice how to approach this is appreciated.", "summary": "Watched my grandmother die from lung cancer from smoking. I don't want to watch my husband do the same thing. We have a baby on the way. My friends think it could always be worse and I'm overreacting."}
{"id": "t3_g5f6u", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, do you need help spiffying up your resume?", "post": "Hi folks,\nI want to give back to Reddit.\nReddit has given me so much and I just want to give back to the community.\n\nIm thinking about setting up a designated email address to provide you guys with, and when I have time I will just spiffy up your resume (I am a hiring manager) and give you tips on the Application Process.\nBefore I do this I just wanted to ask you guys, what do you think? Would this help you or would I be wasting my time?\n\nThere is also the ethical issue of me giving you the upper hand for a short part of any given Application Process- but if you truly are not a good fit for a position then I believe the hiring manager can determine this at the personal interview stage.\n\nI want to get you guys interviews. And hopefully jobs.\n\n99% of the resume's that come in to my business are crap. I hate seeing this, because who knows if this person would be a great hire but they just dont know how to express that on paper? And most people are not to blame, because most people were never properly taught how to write a resume.\n\nI do the hiring for my restaurant, although Ive been told by others in the field that our Application Process trumps most large corporations and research firms and is way more technical than most Application Processes.", "summary": "I am a hiring manager and I want to give back to the reddit community by editing resumes and dishing out advice straight from the source."}
{"id": "t3_1sqmad", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Got into a car accident.. need legal advice", "post": "This happened in California while I was driving on a local street to home. I was driving in the left lane on a main street that no where close to an intersection. The other car was in the middle lane and I guess the guy didn't check his blind spot because next thing I know he hits me. The damage on my car is on the passanger's side (behind the front wheel but in front of the side mirror) & the damage on his car is on his left bumper. \n\nThere was no police report and the guy is apparently claiming that I was trying to make a left turn on an intersection when he hit me..?  Apparently he has an attorney & I'm not sure if I should get a lawyer also. His son called me today & asked me to re-email him the insurance information because the information I gave him was apparently wrong. However, I talked to my insurance and they had already talked to the guy's insurance company so I'm not sure if he's lying or not. He also wants me to send me pictures of my car's damages because his father didn't take pictures of the damages. I know I shouldn't agree to that but is it safe to even send him the insurance information when it seems that our insurances are already talking?", "summary": "Should I bother interacting with this guy and should I ask for legal advice from a lawyer because this guy is lying? Or should I wait until the insurance companies have a final answer."}
{"id": "t3_2gtqpk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [24 M] thinking of ending things with my girlfriend [22 F] of 8 months but we are taking a mini vacation away together tomorrow. What should I do?", "post": "So I'm honestly at a loss right now. I truthfully feel as though I had a great run with my current girlfriend, but there are definitely a lot of things she is missing in terms of what I want out of a relationship. We hardly connect on many topics including music, tv, hobbies, and honestly even sex is a little too bland for my liking.  \n  \nTo be fair though she is quite fun since she's up for anything so I thought about a month ago it would be a cool idea for us to go on a little mini vacation/roadtrip together (Friday - Monday). Aside from a concert that we are seeing on Saturday (of which I found out she only agreed to go because I wanted to... which is actually a bigger bummer than you would imagine) I'm not too stoked to go. I feel as though I could make it through this weekend but I want to spare her feelings during this whole thing as well.  \n  \nWe're also in a sticky situation right now where she visits me for a couple days at a time and has no access to her home that is a 1 hour train ride away. So right now if I were to break up with her she would be completely screwed otherwise forced to sleep at my apartment.  \n  \nMy solution to this is to break up with her sometime next week after the vacation but I'm not sure if this is cruel. I legitimately do not want to hurt her but I also do want to go through with this, although I am slightly okay with continuing with this vacation... just not sure if it is morally okay.  \n  \nSo that was a bit of a rant but I'm hoping some of you could shed light on what I could do here. I know that she loves me quite a lot and that she is very into me. I mean it definitely shows but it's just not there for me.  \n  \nThanks guys", "summary": "I'm going on a trip with my girlfriend right now but I honestly feel like I just want to break up with her. Is it morally okay to wait until after the trip together?"}
{"id": "t3_1pkb4n", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "[F/31/197] Need to do something! Gained 20 lbs since starting PhD", "post": "This week I was de-cluttering my closet and making piles of clothes to donate and give to my sister.  My sister is an avid biker, swimmer, runner (while we have the same body type, she's much more muscular than I am.)  I'm 5'10\" and I wear between a 10-14 depending on the cut/brand of clothing.  I'm in my 3rd semester as a PhD student and I've gained 20 lbs since beginning my program.  My \"fat\" clothes are tight on me and seeing the pile of clothes \"that don't fit me anymore\" was very discouraging.   During October I made some changes to my diet - avoiding fast food & cooking my own meals at home, drinking water instead of soda.  I also take my pups for a walk every night (between 10-15 minutes).  I've always been a stress eater and my \"comfort foods\" are gluten free bread and pasta, cheese, and oatmeal with granola.   I drive 2 hours round trip to school 3 x week.  My job requires me to sit and work on the computer.  In addition to school (which is stressful enough!)  I've had a lot of things happen in my life - high turn over at work, close friends getting sick, family member pass away, not having enough money to pay bills.  I take an anti-depressant (since 2006).  I love reading the success stories on r/loseit and I feel encouraged to start making more changes like taking longer walks and keeping carb consumption in moderation.  Looking forward to being a success story, too.", "summary": "Have gained 20 lbs in the past 18 months since starting PhD.  Need to change habits to stay healthy and handle stress."}
{"id": "t3_uswyb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Women of reddit, I need your advice.", "post": "So, I'm 17 and kind of in a state of hormonal enragement. As a consequence, sex is always, at least, at the back of my mind. And it gets worse when I talk to a specific girl. I've already told her how I feel about her, but I'm not sure if I'm attracted to her because I enjoy being in her company, because of her personality and sense of humor, or if I'm attracted because of me being 17 and constantly thinking about sex. And if it's the latter, is it still fair for me to chase her? I'm just really confused on the subject. I'm not a prude, I just... don't know what to do, and that's not something that happens to me a lot. I'm open to any suggestions.", "summary": "17, not sure if I like girl for personalty, or b/c of hormones, and not sure if fair to chase if hormones"}
{"id": "t3_10uftj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I handle an ex's SO being obsessed with my life?", "post": "Basically, my ex and I split up (years ago). I'm 27f and my ex is a guy. We were still friends until he found a new gf (who I never had a relationship with good or bad). This new gf started to do tons of stuff way too coincidental that was just like me. So much so, that my friends started to notice without me even bringing it up.\n\nFast forward about a year and doing anything I can to protect myself (cleaning up my online identity), I've since moved to a completely different COUNTRY and I'm getting married. However, the problem STILL exists. This time it's negatively affecting my career, and people that I meet with here to find jobs are asking me why this girl from my old home is contacting them. Nothing horrible, but spying on what I'm doing in my career and trying to make the same friends from thousands of miles away.\n\nI'm sorry to be vague but I don't want to give out too much info on the internet. I'm also not sure if this is the right place to ask.\n\nI don't think she is purposely trying to sabotage my life, I just think she is trying too hard to be like me and getting too involved and needs to move on...\n\nMy basic question is, do I confront her with a nice message asking her to flat out stop? Or do I keep on ignoring it even though its been several months on going?\n\nThanks.", "summary": "Broke up with ex years ago and their new girlfriend is negatively affecting my life. Do I ask her to stop or ignore her?"}
{"id": "t3_25rdvn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my crush [17 F] 2, She's a party girl but I'm not.", "post": "Here's the deal. I've been talking to this girl for a couple months on and off. I like her, and she has told me that she likes me. She the type of girl who gets C-B's in school and parties every weekend, I get straight A's in school and never go to parties. I'm not antisocial I just don't like the party environment and drinking in general. For some reason it bothers me that she goes out to these parties and they are just not my thing. Is this something to be feeling this way about or should I just shrug it off?", "summary": "A girl I like that likes me back goes to parties and it bothers me, is this something that is worth being a bit upset over?"}
{"id": "t3_40n0vw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 F] with my ex [ 31M] 3 years, he was two timing and chose her - I am so jealous of his new relationship.", "post": "well. it says it in the description. I was left behind. the french girl was chosen. I have been not spoken to him since I found out (3.5 months ago) and he seems to have uprooted my life completely and waltzed into a happy life with seemingly no consequences.\n\nNow that the cat is out of the bag, he can openly post about the vacations they take together and call her AMOUR every chance he gets. I feel sick to my stomach just typing this. \n\nYes, I know I should not be stalking his social media (I do it through an account he doesn't know is mine - and yes I know how crazy that sounds)\n\nI wish it didn't hurt so bad. I guess I thought he would be thinking of me sometimes at least, but I guess he has truly moved on and is genuinely happy. \n\nI don't even know what I want out of posting this. I guess just venting? I wish I could talk to him, but I am not the french girl so it would never be what I want it to be. I wish it would stop hurting.", "summary": "ex was two timing me and a french girl for 3 years - chose the french girl because she is muslim and I am not. I am jealous of their happy relationship and can't move on."}
{"id": "t3_dk3md", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can i encourage my boyfriend to explore his sexual side? DAE have experience with this?", "post": "Ok, obvious throw away account is obvious because i've found my boyfriend surfing here lately and i don't want him to know i'm asking for your advice about this. Background story; we've been together for around 1&1/2 years now and it's been pretty sweet. We get along great, we spend tons of time together, we're both pretty attractive people (i know he is, and i'd like to think i am) and basically i couldn't ask for a cooler boyfriend. There is only one catch. I consider myself to be a pretty sexual individual. I often let my mind wander to naughty things (mostly about my boyfriend, which i feel good about) and get excited and then want to try those things later. He, on the other hand, does none of this. At the beginning of the relationship there was slightly more sexual interaction, but almost all of it was initiated by me. Since then we've been having less and less sex because i became insecure constantly initiating it, assuming that he either doesn't find me sexually attractive anymore or he is just uninterested in general. I've tried on many occasions to ask him what he found exciting or arousing, even offering risque secrets of my own in order to make him feel more comfortable, but no matter what i do he insists that he just doesn't have any turn ons. I think he feels that he needs to repress his sexuality as a man, but he's done it to a point that he has none. We are to the point now that we have sex MAYBE once a week (we sleep in bed together around 4-6 times a week) and i just don't know what to do. He insists that he finds me sexually attractive and he enjoys the sex when we have it, but he has no desire to initiate. Can anyone help? Does anyone have experience with this?", "summary": "I am in an amazing relationship with a kickass guy who happens to have an incredibly low libido. He doesn't care about doing it much, and i want to 24/7."}
{"id": "t3_1pc0rg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my gf [20 /F] 5 months, her mental health/depression is driving me to leave her", "post": "I have been dating her for about 4-5 months now and from about the 2nd month I started noticing signs of impending mental health problems. But I ignored them.. I currently am not my normal self lately, I've been sick with a chest infection for 3 weeks, I am tired and can't do anything right. It's affecting my grades in school etc.\n\n*  She told me she loved me within 2 months and expected me to say it back, I was super drunk and she was slightly intoxicated , I said I wasn't sure how to go about it because we were still early on in our relationship and I was still working up my feelings. She started making a scene infront of my friends and bawled and then wouldn't move off of the couch and then when i left to go home with my best friend she wouldn't let me go.\n\n* That was the first sign and by the third month it had gotten to the point where she would take 30 minutes to leave even though she knew i had to be up at 5:20 am in the morning. I would always tell her earlier in advance that I was going to bed early and she would still do it.\n\n* She has problems with past self injury and has attempted to end it all before on separate occasions, one time was very close and doctors saved her life.\n\n* I have had her run out of my house at around 3 in the morning when she was upset with me because I didn't want to cuddle and I wanted to sleep. She was also upset because we were talking about her depression. I of course ran after her on the first occasion and walked for half an hour in freezing weather in my pajamas and a shirt.\n\n* She has agreed to go see a psychologist this week, but I am so depressed and numb for the last few weeks that I am just not sure If I can do it any longer. I have just talked to her on the phone and said I need time to think, I'm not sure where to go from here.. \n\n> any advice?", "summary": "girlfriend is depressed, self injurious and it's pouring over into me and I'm becoming depressed and thinking of self harm lately."}
{"id": "t3_37b4s1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/M] wondering if he's doing the right thing to a [25/f] ex/\"friend\"", "post": "Dated a girl for 6 months who eventually left me for her abusive ex who got \"better\".\n\nThey lasted 3 months and she came back to me saying removing me from her life was her biggest mistake.\n\nI forgive her since she said that she is completely over him forever.  We date again for 3-4 months.\n\nAbusive ex contacts her telling her that he's depressed and needs someone to go to counseling with.  She takes a \"break\" with us and goes to counseling with him.\n\nShe says she wants to date when this is all over and wants to ditch her abusive ex ASAP once he gets help.\n\nFast forward 5 months...  She says that we have zero chemistry together and when we dated we only had \"very little\".  She says she doesn't have time for a relationship at all.  But still hangs out with her abusive ex from time to time.\n\nSummary of the entire thing:  She left me the first time because he \"got better\" which he obviously didn't.  He's now actually getting better, so am I crazy or is she actually going to go back with him?  (After saying very mean things about him/telling she'd never go back ever).\n\nMy question?  I haven't initiated any text with her for the past 3 days.  I'm completely over her but scared I'm destroying this \"friendship\" she wants between us...  Before all of this I blocked her from everything and she went as far as emailing me saying that she wants to be unblocked or else she won't ever speak to me again.  (Seems kind of desperate to stay in touch?)\n\nI don't have any feelings for her.  Just wondering what the hell is going on.", "summary": "Ex might go back to crazy abusive ex again.  I haven't initiated any conversation in this \"friendship\" at all for a couple of days.  Do I keep on doing this?  Or actually act like a friend?"}
{"id": "t3_42pap6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23 F) had sex with a friend (27 M) who turns out has a girlfriend (27/28 F). Should I remain friends with him?", "post": "Hey,  r/relationships! Looks like I'm beginning to be a regular poster here if you include my primary account. Not the best feeling though, haha. Anyways. \n\nI met him (27 M) during the time that I was on the rocks with another relationship (LDR,  if that matters). During that time I never hit on him even though I felt attracted to him because of my relationship. When that relationship ended, he was one of the people who helped me get back on my feet and even went with me on a holiday because the ex (25 M) and I planned it out before breaking up. So as I tried to get over my ex, I had sex with the guy because based from his stories, he told me that he's been single for more than a year and I was beginning to trust him more. \n\nThat was a month ago, and just recently, have hooked up again, twice. The red flag I should have noticed is he refuses to be Facebook friends or even let me follow his Twitter as he's following mine. The only thing I follow him on is Instagram, which is how I learned that he has a girlfriend. \n\nThe girlfriend (27/28 F) knew about me THE ENTIRE TIME and decided to post about me on her blog, telling that I chose to play a losing battle. The thing is, I never knew. He's only told me of having a girl best friend but never the degree. \n\nI'm more hurt about this betrayal than the relationship I had that I just recently moved on from because I really thought that this guy would be honest and a special person in my life. I told my closest friends what to do and they told me to stick to a decision I can live through. \n\nSo this is why I'm here, yet again. I still want him to be a part of my life and he's told me he'd still stick around (I know, words are nothing) but I think that if only I didn't have sex with him then I would forgive him easily.", "summary": "Friend (27 M) of 3 months had sex with me (23 F) not knowing he has a girlfriend (27/28 F). Told me GF knows about it. Should I keep the friendship with him?"}
{"id": "t3_25stz8", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Feeling inadequate whenever I'm with my girlfriend", "post": "I've met this incredible, funny, loving girl, and we've been dating for about two months. She's everything I want in a partner, but there's one feeling I can't get rid of whenever I'm with her.\n\nShe's a ridiculously outgoing person who talks to everyone around her and is not above fooling about and making herself look stupid. Though that's one of my favourite things about her, I get this sinking feeling of inadequacy when we're with other people.\n\nWhile I'm social and outgoing myself, I feel invisible whenever there are other people around, as she will socialize with pretty much all of them and barely look at or speak to me for varying periods of time. If we're having a cozy moment alone in our school cafeteria she might suddenly jump up and walk over to greet one of her friends if they walk into the room, as if I'm not there at all. I feel like I can be replaced at any point in time seeing as I'm so easily deprioritised. \n\nI can't just tell her she needs to stop either, as the last thing I want is her spending time with me because she feels like she has to.\nI end up not really knowing what to do; should I engage with their conversations and become the kind of boyfriend who never lets her talk to people by herself? Should I get busy with something else pretending I don't feel like crap? Am I just overthinking this whole thing?", "summary": "I feel inadequate and invisible whenever my really social girlfriend deprioritises or interrupts alone time to spend time with others, as she frequently does. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2upx7x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [23M] crazy to casually date a [18F] for my last semester?", "post": "I met her at a coffee shop last semester and we started hanging out as friends. She is a freshman and has noted her biggest priority is transferring to another school with a more supportive and challenging department next spring. Being involved with a student organization, interning, working in the library, writing for her newspaper and taking upper-division classes, she told me she is going to hold off serious relationships until her junior year. \n\nI have to mention that along with being incredibly hot, she is very levelheaded and self-aware. Extremely attractive qualities in my opinion. \n\nThis is my last semester and I have been thinking lately of possibly asking her if casually dating each other seems like a good idea. Asking her yesterday, she told me we're in different life stages and if I can bear with her figuring out college while I'm leaving college, it could work out. This sounds reasonable to me, but I have to ask if this situation sounds unconventional.", "summary": "I want to go out with an 18 year old freshman girl, and I'm not sure if this would have any complications."}
{"id": "t3_3kwmbn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25 M] girlfriend [ 23 F] stays in close contact with a bunch of her past boyfriends and fwb and it's driving me crazy.", "post": "Title. First off let me explain, this isn't about me saying she has no right to talk to them, she can talk to whoever she pleases. This is mostly about me.\n\nSo I don't know this through snooping or anything like that, I know because it's so out in the open in our relationship. We've been dating for a year and I know she has no desire to cheat on me. We have a great relationship and live together. Very few arguments or issues, we are generally a happy couple. I often keep issues like this bottled and to myself, most people find insecurity and lack of confidence unattractive, so I don't show it. However it's eating away at me and I don't know why, I can't shake it from my mind.\n\nI recently came to the logical deduction that a friend that she speaks with regularly used to be fuck buddies with her, and that revelation is making me uncomfortable, despite the fact that there is 0 reason to be upset or think something is going on. There's also other dudes who message her regularly, but it's completely harmless (she's shown me the texts)\n\nI know people are capable to forming friendships past sex but at the same time I can't shake these feelings of insecurity from my head. I don't know what to do or how to change how I feel, or come to terms with it and get over it. I don't want to break up, I want to work on dealing with my feelings, but i have no idea how to approach this. I feel like bringing it up with her is a bad idea, as it won't change anything and will make me look like a control freak and insecure, which i'd prefer not to do.\n\nI want to feel confident about it all and have trust in our relationship. I feel pathetic for feeling this way.", "summary": "my girlfriend still chats harmlessly with old fuck buddies. I don't know how to deal without sounding like a controlling and insecure person. plz halp."}
{"id": "t3_4yxusd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 M] with my high school sweetheart wife [29 F] \u2014 we just separated and I don't know where to go", "post": "I JUST separated from my wife, and I use the term \"separated\" loosely.\n\nWe have been together since we were teenagers and have moved together several times. We've not been married long, but have been together virtually forever. The split is as amicable as could be \u2014 we have some long unresolved, and undiscussed issues that bubbled up. The short story is that we're not the same people we were when we were teenagers and we just don't really work anymore.\n\nTo top that off, I've been going through some depression and have told her that I feel alone all the time. That brings me to the problem.\n\nNearly all of our friends are shared couple friends, especially in my case. I have some personal friends in town, but they've all sort of faded away. We live far from family and I don't have a job that I can take more than a day or two off from without fucking things up. So basically, I find myself separated from my wife but with no place to go and no friends I feel I can turn to. I ultimately think the separation is the right move, but my loneliness is only compounded by the fact that that my wife has been my primary relationship through my entire life. It just happened and we're both still under the same roof in a small apartment \u2014\u00a0I feel like I need to go someplace but I have nobody to turn to.\n\nWhere do I even start with finding a place to go? How do I cope without my own social groups?", "summary": "Recently separated and have no friends of my own and no family in town to turn to. Don't know where to go next..."}
{"id": "t3_gzjbf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What can we call \"sighted people\" problems?", "post": "Reddit!\nMy friends and I are trying come up with a phrase similar to \"first world problems\", except for people with \"good vision problems.\" \n\nThe background:\n\nI'm blind in my right eye but have enough sight in my left eye to get on well enough. The only genuine sucky bit is not being able to look deep into the eyes of someone I love, which is pretty important (as I've found).\n\nOtherwise the main thing is not being able to drive. My town/this country is not very public transportation friendly, so that's been frustrating. One thing I love to do is make situations awkward/make friends laugh by emphasizing sight related claims. It's to the point that when I'm meeting someone new who uses words like \"see\" or \"look\" too much, I will occasionally stare back at them with a horrified look or even just a simple eyebrow raise and any friends nearby will start to laugh uncontrollably  knowing exactly what I'm thinking/possibly going to say.\n\nExamples:\n\nFriend driving me home from class last Tuesday night:\n>Friend: \"Can you see gas prices going up any higher than they are now?\"\n\n>Me: \"No I can't *see* gas prices going up because I can't *see*m to remember where I parked the *car* that I don't own that I can't drive that doesn't exist because I'm blind.\"\n\nWe are also trying to come up with hot-button words/phrases to include in this. So far we have:\n \n* watch\n* look\n* see\n* view\n* visualize\n* eye**s**\n* observe\n* focus\n* **bi**noculars\n* **bi**focals\n* **bi**sexual\n* Leela from Futurama\n* glass**es**\n\nMuch love to you and your eyeball**s**,\n\nClick", "summary": "blind in one eye, love to joke about it, want a phrase and jokes to use when people talk about their \"I have good vision but...\" related problems. "}
{"id": "t3_49m5hh", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Never...ever assume anything", "post": "My cousin is dating this over possessive guy, my cousin also lives on the other side of the world from me. We get along pretty good. \n\nWell one day I'm browsing through FB and she has a post that says \"Tell your girl first thing in the morning 'good morning beautiful' and it will make her day so much better\"\n\nSo I comment \"Good morning beautiful\" knowing she'll see when she wakes up and went on with my life.\n\n2 hrs later I get a comment \"Stop hitting on my girl or I'm going destroy you!\" it was from John\n\nI replied \"Excuse me? Who are you?\"\n\nHe responded \"I'm her man, and you need to back off she's taken\"\n\nI'm finding this funny and respond with a laugh\n\nHe responded again \"Stay away or else\"\n\nI think this is funny\n\nHere is the great thing, my cousin reads this and goes \"John, thats my cousin, clam down\"\n\nJohn replies \"Stop lying to me\"\n\nTo which she responds \"Alright, we are done\"\n\nAnd thats how John got dumped.", "summary": "Cousin boyfriend assumed I was her secret lover or had a crush on my cousin. Called my cousin a liar, he got dumped."}
{"id": "t3_3279lg", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by gesturing obscenely to a two year old", "post": "This was a few years ago. \n\nI'm an English teacher in Korea. One of my main gigs back in the day was leading a play group of very young children (2-5 years old) and their mothers. We would sing songs, make crafts, play games... stuff like that. At the end of class, there would be a one on one quiz with each child. I would try to get them to say a couple words and they would get a treat. All very fun and engaging and all in English.\n\nMy fuckup occurred one day during the quiz. I was sitting on the floor with the child, a little girl, and her mom. She was very young... too young to really get anything from the class. \n\nSometimes if the kid wasn't into it, I'd play small games to focus their attention. This particular time, I decided to try something that my dad always used to do with my siblings and me: he'd kinda pinch our nose between the knuckles of his middle and index fingers. Then he'd show us his thumb between the knuckles and say, \"I've got your nose!\" It was supposed to look like he pinched the nose off our face. I don't know if I'm explaining it clearly or not... but it was silly and we'd laugh and that was it.\n\nSo I do this to this little girl (who can't really even speak Korean yet, let alone attempt what I'm asking her to do in English). The mom gives me a horrified look. Something is obviously wrong so I hand over the treat and mom scoops up baby and off they go.\n\nAfter, I explain to my Korean co-teacher what happened and she cracks up. Apparently that hand gesture, the fist with the thumb poking between the index and middle fingers, is the Korean equivalent to flipping the bird. Chalk another one up to cultural misunderstanding!", "summary": "I didn't know the Korean version of the middle finger and unwittingly busted it out on a young girl in an English class."}
{"id": "t3_20shlv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my SO [21 M/F] 11.5mo, she is queer but now claims to be fluid and more interested in women than men (as was previous 11 months).", "post": "Me and my SO have been dating for just under a year.  She told me she liked girls when we started dating and she had experimented with them, but after a few weeks of dating I had asked her who she liked better and she said \"Men, I like men.\".  And so we dated and it's been great... until recently.  She recently confided in me that she was going through a Fluid sexuality state in which she prefers women over men.  \n\nWe both love each other and satisfy each other as partners, I am just unsure as to that this means for our relationship.  She also told me that she has been feeling imcompatible with me sexually because we cannot finish together (she has a hard time finishing and gets frustrated when she gets very closed but doesn't).  There's been a sexual disconnection between us. She has told me that it has taken her a very long time to admit and come to terms with the fact that she is queer and I'm assuming this is her coming out to me.  \n\nI am understanding of people who are bisexual or other, but I don't know how to best adapt to this situation where my partner's sexuality fluid and she is unsure.  We've never had issues with loyalty or anything regarding infidelity so I'm sure it isn't someone else.  \n\nI suggested we work things out by maybe involving other women in a threesome or swinger parties (we've discussed these ideas in the past but never acted upon them). She seemed open to the suggestion but indecisive if that was the best decision.", "summary": "Partner comes out to tell me she is fluid, feeling sexual disconnection, not sure how to act / how best to accommodate for the situation! Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_wtwxa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What are some of your best drive-thru stories at a fast food joint? Either as the employee or the customer?", "post": "My side of this story is as the customer. Sort of. The other day, I was riding shotgun with one of my buddies on the way home from one of our other friend's houses. It was getting close to dinner time, so we decide to get some fast food.\n\nMy friend pulls into a restaurant and drives up to the little intercom thing where the employee's can take your order. Without even waiting for the voice to ask, \"How can I help you today?\" or whatever, my friend says, without any hesitation,\n\n\"Let me get two McChickens, a big-ass sweet tea, and McFlurry, BOUNCE.\"\n\nAnd then immediately drives up to the first window. I'm cracking up at this point, and we are both watching the guy through the window quickly looking around and trying to figure out what happened, as he was somewhat unaware an order had even been placed.\n\nOnce the employee saw the kid with the wife beater and backwards snapback hat on staring expectantly at him through the window, he started laughing and then took his order again.\n\nNot exactly the most exciting or rewarding story, but I was laughing uncontrollably throughout the majority of the whole ordeal.\n\nSo, what are some of your drive-thru stories?", "summary": "Friend placed an order at a fast food drive-thru lane and drove up to the window before the employee even knew what was going on."}
{"id": "t3_3r9lem", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by turning off a bright coffee shop flood light", "post": "So this happened over the weekend. To create a visual of why I did this, I live in a building that is right behind a donut / coffee shop. I look out and I can see their building right not even 100 ft away. Recently, they installed a new flood lamp on the backside of their building and it shines directly into my apartment. Really bright, really annoying. Its late and I cant go pickup any blackout curtains just yet. So being the genius I am, I decided its time to fight back and do something about it. I walked over to the coffee shop at like 1 in the morning, they're long closed by now. Beneath the bright flood lamp is a huge box with a ON / OFF lever. So I throw the lever with a huge TERCHUNK, bam, light is off. With pride I walk back to my place and enjoy the darkness of the light. Its late, whatever, light is off.\n\nThe next morning, I swing by that very coffee shop to order some food and coffee. Though they said they cant make half of what I ordered because their power went out overnight and the lost some product. It took me a moment to then realize what I had done as I turn nearly white and leave with my coffee.", "summary": "Bright light on coffee shop in back yard. I throw the switch beneath it to turn it off, which turns out to be their main power line."}
{"id": "t3_22xixs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] dealing with unrequited feelings for a friend [19 F].", "post": "I'm a 19-year old guy who has an interest in a 19-year old girl in the year below me in college. I thought at one point that she had an interest in me, but I have discovered recently that she has an interest in another guy who is a senior. What's more, on a few occasions she has brought up her interest in this guy to me in conversation, which seems to suggest that she is oblivious to my interest in her. Further, it seems to suggest that she's just not interested in me. I know that if i had somewhat of an interest in two girls, I wouldn't bring up my interest in one to the other.\n\nSo a few of my friends suggested just asking her to dinner (on-campus, nothing fancy) sometime just to throw myself out there. If she says no then I'll move on. It might make things awkward between us but I think we'd manage. What do you think? I hung out with her last night and it was amazing but a few times she brought up this other guy and it just sucks a lot, so any advice would be awesome.\n\nI know this situation is nothing extraordinary, but it's been affecting me greatly recently so I would appreciate any advice. For example, I recently woke up from a dream where we hugged and spent what seemed like ages just thinking about it before I could manage to fall asleep again. Kind of embarrassing but it demonstrates how much my mind seems to fixate on this.\n\nThank you so much.", "summary": "Unreciprocated feelings for a friend of mine, she seems to at least currently just think of me as a friend. Should I simply move on? How? Thanks so much!"}
{"id": "t3_3mcrf0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by sharing a video with my french class", "post": "So our french teacher asked us to make an interview in french as a proyect, my friends and I made a pretty long video (compared to the other teams) in which I added a lot of memes when I edited it, and also I uploaded it to Youtube ( skip to minute 4, the first moments are really boring), then I sended it to our teacher, which had a blast watching it, but my friends and I had fear that we were going to show it to all the class, and that's exactly what happened. we first saw the other videos, which were poorly edited but really funny, but then the moment to watch our video came, and I was the only one of my friends that wanted our video to be watched because I had trust in my work.\nWhat happened next was really akward, the first 4 minutes everyone was bored af, because that's the only serious part, but then shit hits the fan and the memes start to appear, to be honest I was confident that they would at least giggle, then I was horrified because they had a face that subtly said \"what the fuck\", they laughed only once in a whole 11 minute video, at the end there is an akward silence in the classroom and our teacher only says \"well... everyone can have artistic liberty\", guess im not doing the graduation video anymore...", "summary": "I Made a video for a french proyect with too much memes, when my classmates saw it they were really disturbed."}
{"id": "t3_wfb7j", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So I watched the first Zeitgeist movie (enter Slowpoke)", "post": "So...\nI have read other threads regarding the movie, but they were too old to comment on. I would like to make a small preamble:\n\nI know many things are wrong with part one; as an inquisitive atheist I knew most of the things he said apart from much of the stuff which turned out to be bullshit anyway. \n\nThe parts that I find intriguing are the last three parts. I don't know much about the federal reserve, so any input would be helpful. The bits about the US engineering the conflicts in WWI, WWII, and Vietnam I find somewhat dubious, but I might ask a friend of line who is a history buff to help me out with this, but again, any input would be great. \n\nNow with part two... I just don't know. I have sort of taken the South Park route and said \"how could a government as apparently inept as ours in so many other ways somehow be responsible for not just 9/11, but virtually every major war in the 20th century.\" But some of the things like the \"molten lead\" in pools around ground zero weeks after the attack, the fall of tower 7 which I have *never* heard about before this movie, the \"vaporizing\" planes of the Pentagon and the field in Virginia... How could they ID the suspects and yet say there was enough heat to vaporize steel? How could jet fuel \"vaporize\" a whole plane in these two instances and yet with countless other documented plane crashes could there be extensive wreckage? Where *was* NORAD during the whole thing? I don't know enough about architecture, not about the structure of the twin towers to have a truly informed opinion, but that's what I hope to gain from making this post.", "summary": "Saw Zeitgeist I (Slowpoke), want to discuss, especially \"vaporizing\" planes. Go, Reddit Go!"}
{"id": "t3_4cmw0h", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "(Independent Contractor) how to create a safety net for refunds", "post": "so first off I will start by saying that I am an independent contractor situated in little old New Zealand. I left high school 3 years ago and have since been going from one job to another, all within the residential and commercial lighting industry. \n\n6 months ago to the day I got a new job, as an independent contractor. Upon taking this wonderful opportunity I didn't quite fully understand what an independent contractor was, in the excitement of it all, trying to find a job I agreed to the position and do my business started. For the most part I love what I do however learning how to deal with money within my business has been a particular struggle for me thus far. My biggest problem is that if a customer cancels their order or would like a refund, the commission that has been payed to me then has to be given back to the company. However I am finding that a lot of these refunds are big orders so at any time I am to refund $400-500. \n\nI have found that if this happens it is causing strain on my personal life as my commission just gets payed into our joint account (my fianc\u00e9 and myself).", "summary": "Am I doing something wrong here? Is this normal? How do I create a safety net to prevent the refunds causing a strain on my budget?"}
{"id": "t3_3do99o", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Need advice: pay off debt, save or both?", "post": "The basics: 28 years old, I make $15/hour, I have zero savings and I have approximately 10k in credit card debt. I make about $1,900/month after taxes. I am currently looking for a job that pays more and also offers a 401K and insurance, because my current one does neither.\n\nI've recently moved into my parent's house in order to get a handle on this. \n\nI'm not paying rent, utilities or any other bills. My parents are generous to keep the kitchen stocked and we make dinner every night, so my food expenses are low. I essentially just need to buy gas, personal toiletries and the occasional food item. \n\nUsing unbury.us, I determined that if I put $1,500 toward my debt, I can pay it off by April 2016. I'm using the snowball method. My interest rates are 22.9% (this one will be paid off on August 5), 19.99%, 19.24% and 14.24%. \n\nThis will give me $400/month to live on, which considering I have no expenses except my debt and buying gas, is fine for now. \n\nHowever....I'm wondering if it would be wiser to put less toward my debt and start putting something into savings? So take longer to pay off debt, but have be able to put something into a separate savings account that I won't be spending.", "summary": "pay off debt as quickly as possible without putting money into a savings account OR pay off debt slower, but build my savings on the side?"}
{"id": "t3_jqev7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, do you know anyone who you could totally see go into porn (or become a stripper)? I'll go first.", "post": "There's a girl I knew from high school who recently turned 18. She flirts with and touches all kinds of guys, loves the attention, and is constantly acting strapped for cash and does random jobs for her friends for cash (despite insisting on going to Victoria's Secret for her bras. Apparently they're the only ones who can fit a bra right). She also talks pretty dirty, referencing sex when the conversation has nothing to do with it. Such as guys talking about \"jacking (stealing)\" things, she goes \"you know, there's another meaning behind that word.\" She's short, asian, has both mommy and daddy issues, but insists that she doesn't want to date (despite all her flirting). And since she was 15, she's been flirting with grown men in their 20s. I also heard she played strip poker with her older sister's boyfriend when she was in middle school (older sis and bf were 16 i think?) Anyway, she calls herself innocent, but she really straddles the line between innocent and dirty.", "summary": "I know a girl who has issues and flirts with too many boys, and complains about not having enough money. I think she's a future porn candidate."}
{"id": "t3_1lzd8n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (20F) boyfriend (24M) said something that I consider to be racist. I don't know where to go from here.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for a little bit over three months. He is much more conservative than I am and also more religious but it never affected the way that we interact or influenced the way I felt about him. The other day we were hanging out and we were talking about relationships. I asked him if he dated any women that were not Caucasian and he said that he had dated an Asian woman and a woman who came from a muslim family. He proceeds to ask me the same question and I say no, but that I've always found black men to be attractive but just never had the opportunity to date such a man. This is where it gets insulting; he says \"Really? Girls only want to date black men because they have big dicks. Classy white girls only date white, brown or Asian men - not black men\" Not only was this racist but it was insulting to me. I told him what he said was seriously wrong and he got defensive saying \"It's not racist, but i'm just stating facts, you'll see when you get older\" after pressuring him for a few minutes he said \"okay, what I said was wrong\" and I sort of dropped it. Its been a day and its still bothering me. Should I bring it up again? I really like him but this side of him has me worried... I've always been openly accepting of other people no matter their colour, sexual orientation, socio-economic status etc and I don't know if a relationship can blossom with such different mindsets..", "summary": "Boyfriend made a racist comment when we were hanging out and I don't know how to continue in this relationship. should I confront him again?"}
{"id": "t3_4h35g9", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Why are Cosmetology School Transcripts necessary to start fresh at University?", "post": "I've been \"trying\" really hard to start my college education this past year, but I'm very stuck due to not being able to obtain all of my transcripts. I was able to obtain my high school transcript and ACT scores from 2009 relatively painlessly, however, I'm having NO luck in retrieving my cosmetology(Paul Mitchell the School)s transcript to be sent to universities I'm interested in. I have contacted PMTS repeatedly without being able to get in touch with anyone in admissions, until finally I was informed that I needed to contact someone else entirely.\n\n*deep breath* So I did. \n\nI spoke with a man who said that he would be able to send out my transcript, however he noticed that I had an outstanding balance of 40k or some outlandish sum of money, to which I made it known that I was COMPLETELY unaware of. He added that I should have been sent to collections by now, that it was a \"school fee\" that would not be covered by financial aid.\nI asked him to elaborate so he said he would send me more information on it, then instructed me to send him an email with the address of the university I wish to have my transcripts sent to. \n\nAnd I never heard back. \n\nI did not complete my degree at PMTS, I dropped out at about 400+/- hours. I'm having a hard time understanding why those transcripts are even necessary to continue my education if I start out as a freshman anyway. But...\n\nI NEED MY TRANSCRIPT GOSH DARN IT! \n\nI need help, looking to see if someone is able to enlighten me as to any loop holes to get around, or if there are any similar experiences shared by others, or in general please just tell me what I need to do because I'm very lost. Also, why would I owe such a ridiculous amount of money just for 400hours of school? It just doesn't seem right.", "summary": "I need my hair school transcripts but they won't send them so I can't start my college education but I really need/want to."}
{"id": "t3_4klykf", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "MFP and Fitbit not communicating properly, getting different results", "post": "Hello all, so the other day I read a post about using MFP to track food and just linking it to a Fitbit so I figured I would give it a shot since everyone loves MFP so much. I've been using my Fitbit with a fair amount of success since February and love it but I end up adding a lot of foods since they aren't in the database.\n\nMy problem is this: I linked MFP with Fitbit for steps and food and only logged my food in MFP like it told me to in 3 different places. I have all the same statistics in both applications including desired weight loss but at the end of the day I had different amounts of calories left. \n\nIn order to lose 1lb/week  Fitbit says I need a 500 Cal deficit so I assume it's the same with MFP but MFP says I have 36 calories remaining and Fitbit says I'm OVER by 110 calories. \n\nI tried checking online first and I can only find people having the opposite problem bc they accidentally log food in both apps but I am 100% sure I did not do that. \n\nHas anyone had this problem? How did you fix it?", "summary": "using MFP and Fitbit together, Fitbit says I'm over 110 calories MFP says I have 36 calories left."}
{"id": "t3_3sgkvd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21m] and dating a [23f] who gets offended when I try to nudge her in \"the right direction\"", "post": "I put \"the right direction\" in quotes because that's just my opinion... But at the same time it's not. I am joining the military and i am desperately trying get more fit. I am losing weight, lifting weights, swimming and running. My girlfriend complains to me about her physique a few times a month. I try to offer her advice... Simple advice without attacking her, but she gets so defensive every time. I talk to her about her diet and excersised but she deflects my advice and still complains. She tells me the only reason I am getting healthy is because I'm joining the military. This is a part of it.... However, there is more to it than that. I want to be healthy and not be chubby. So does she. However, I am working hard at it and she is not. Then she complains and it starts the cycle over again. I need help here.... I love her but I want to be a healthy family and I want to marry someone who can get shit done and not just make excuses. It is important to me. Am I being selfish, here?", "summary": "GF won't be healthier even though she and i want her to be.... How do I help her? Am I being selfish?"}
{"id": "t3_rdj3q", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is Nena's Finest in Yakima, WA?", "post": "So we were looking for a strip club in Yakima Washington. No luck there. But we kept getting hits for a place called Nena's Finest, with tags fors Adult Entertainment and Services. We got their address online, so we drive over. When we get there, it's an upper-middle class neighborhood, and the address in question is a fairly nice triplex. This is at 2 o'clock inthe morning. We decide to call them and see what they are about. So we call them and they answer. At two in the morning. Shaking off the shock real quick we  ask if it was in fact Nena's Finest. The guy who answers confirms it is. Then we ask what they sell. He hung up on us. So, barring the fact that no reputable business outside of fast food is usually open at two in the morning, we are reasonably convinced this place is a brothel. \n\nSo the next day, we call again, and a different guy answers, and he has no idea what we are talking about when we ask about Nena's Finest. So we go back to the address, and when we go to the door, a small child answers. We leave. The gps says that the other address could be a smaller house just down the street. When we knock on the door there, a sweet old lady answers, and does not know what Nena's Finest is, but she mentions that people are always mixing her address. And here we are. We are going to go back later and try again, but if Reddit happens to know what the deal here is that would be awesome.", "summary": "= We are convinced that a place called Nena's Finest is a brothel or something sketch like that, but not quite sure."}
{"id": "t3_3b81ua", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [16 F] girlfriend of two weeks thinks that I [17 M] am only dating her/talking to her so I can sleep with her", "post": "Okay so basically I met this girl a few weeks ago and we really hit it off, starting dating a few days later. So far things have been going great, up until yesterday.\n\nYesterday we are making out and all of a sudden she stops and I ask what's wrong, and she says that she's worried that I only want her for sex, and that the only reason I like her is because she is hot.\n\nI'm asking for advice on how I can convince her that I do like her for more than just her body. I know our relationship has only started very recently, but i do like her a lot and would like to see it progress. Yesterday when we were texting we talked about it and I told her that she meant so much more than just sex to me, and that she was funny, talented, and many other things, basically that I really enjoyed being around her and being with her, but I don't think she believed me 100%.", "summary": "Girlfriend who i have yet to sleep with thinks the only reason I'm with her is for sex, which is not true. Advice for convincing her of this."}
{"id": "t3_4n7uff", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "My son is 4 months old and I divorced his alcoholic father a month ago. Has anyone been in a similar situation? How do I cope with the guilt?", "post": "I never believed in divorce, I thought marriage was forever but life dealt me another set of cards. We went down every avenue trying to fix our marriage - two inpatient rehab stays, AA, Al-Anon, marriage counseling, individual counseling. When our son was born it was like someone flipped a light switch and I realized that my son was not safe with him and he couldn't grow up with the uncertainty of being parented by an addict, even though he's mostly a functional one. I moved to another state and moved in with my parents and the three of us work together to care for my son and make his life as happy as possible. My dad is super involved, changing diapers, taking him for walks, playing with him, etc but my dad is not his father. \n\nI'm struggling even though I know my decision was the right one with the guilt of robbing my son of his real father.  His dad rarely asks about him and when he does, he will text my mom. Most of his Facebook posts are about how much he misses our son. He tells me he doesn't ask about him because talking to me is too painful. He also owes me over $500 in back child support. He told me it was because he was waiting for them to mail him the paperwork. I took care of all the proper forms yesterday, once again taking care of his responsibilities and enabling him just like I did in our marriage.\n\nHow do I let go of the guilt, the love I still have for my ex husband and raise a strong man without a dad? Please tell me it gets better.", "summary": "My son's father is an alcoholic. I divorced him and I feel guilty that my son won't grow up with a dad."}
{"id": "t3_35rkx3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my close friend [19 F] of 2 semesters, she tells me she's gay, then I find out it's more complicated than that, then she tells me she loves me and I'm not sure what to do.", "post": "I met this girl during orientation the first week of college. A couple weeks later she started to ask me to go to events with her fairly regularly and we started to become very close. I thought our relationship might turn romantic but then she told me she was gay and only wanted to be friends. This was sort of an emotional blow to me because she was the closest I had ever been to an actual romantic relationship, but I got over it and we stayed friends.\n\nI didn't really talk to her much for a while until like a month into the next semester when she suddenly started asking me to have dinner with her or go to the movies on a fairly regular basis again, like once or twice a week. I wrote these events off as just friendly gestures since she had said she wasn't attracted to guys. Things got more confusing after we started getting drunk together every weekend. She changes a lot when she gets drunk. Someone asked her if she was a lesbian and she replied that that was \"the best theory\". And then she started spontaneously making out with guys at parties. At this point I realized she was sort of emotionally complicated with regards to her sexuality, and I decided not to bring it up. But then she got really drunk one night and made out with my best friend, and she felt really bad about that and apologized to me the next day, so I sort of had to acknowledge that I knew her sexuality was sort of complicated. Anyway, the other day she got super drunk again and started telling me that she was in love with me, and I wasn't really sure what to do (I was also completely sober). \n\nSo now I'm really not sure what to do- should I bring this up with her? I still have feelings for her but I'm more worried about harming her own emotional state, which seems rather fragile, than anything else. She's my best female friend and I wouldn't want to ruin that.\n\nAlso, many apologies if I made an error in style or something, this is my first time posting to Reddit.", "summary": "I become close friends with a girl, she tells me she's gay, she starts making out with guys when she's drunk and then she tells me she loves me. Now I'm just confused."}
{"id": "t3_1n1xzw", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Am I being a bad person?", "post": "Trying to keep this short, also apologies for spelling as this is all off my poor Nokia phone! \n\nBasically, I (18) met a girl on okcupid (22) . I have been on 4 dates with this girl and we got on great from the start and by the second date were acting as if we were a couple almost, the hand holding, kissing, cuddling etc. The problem is I have recently realised as much as i do like this girl the chemistry isn't there for me. Im not how i have been in previous relationships where at the beginning i cant stop thinking about them, or i skip a beat when her name appears on my phone ect. \n\nNow, i can tell this girl likes me alot and she has said so herself, and i worry that by continuing to see her (even though i do enjoy it and want to continue) , i may be misleading or leading her on as she may continue to like me more whereas i dont see my feelings increasing for her and i feel maybe i am simply continuing to see her as i don't have a lot of friends due to moving house alot, and i like having somebody to spend my weekends with. \n\nSo is it wrong or if were both having fun should i let it continue?", "summary": "i enjoy seeing this girl, but can't see myself in a serious relationship with her, do i continue seeing her?"}
{"id": "t3_3lvmhv", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Few Questions Regarding What I can Afford/ Car Buying", "post": "Hello all,\n\nLong time lurker here on PF and I just want to first off say thank you for all the advice and help you guys give. It's been pretty helpful for me as I make the transition from college into the workforce. That being said, I was wondering what you guys think I should be able to afford in the ways of a car while still aptly saving for the future. In the city I moved to, I thought I could survive with out a car as I have done before, but it's becoming more and more difficult just based on my work and living situation. Here's some info to help:\n\n* $70k Annual Salary before taxes\n* ~$28k in student Loans (~$300 min payment/month)\n* $1150 Monthly Rent\n\nI really like the Mazda3. I would like to buy new for around ~20k, but from what I've gathered looking at previous threads, you guys recommend a used car that's a few years old. What do you think about my situation? I think that a used one would run me about ~$15k for one with low mileage. I would have to take out a car loan in either situation.", "summary": "Would you recommend I wait (even though it would make living difficult) until I pay off my loans a little more? Should I go new or used?"}
{"id": "t3_2h2tdq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my girlfriend[19 F] of a year just broke up. Need advice on coping.", "post": "I was in a relationship with a girl from Canada, while I live in the US. After 8 months online, we decided to try to meet in person. The details aren't important, but just say there were some complications, and she decides that she doesn't want to keep waiting to be happy, she doesn't want to keep trying and failing, so she calls it off. The kicker to this story is that I have been dealing with depression for many, many years. She was the first person to really break through the mental walls I have set up over the last decade, and because of that, she was able to affect me on an emotional level I have never experienced. The downside to that is that now, because it's over, the hurt is deeper than I have ever felt. Anyone in a similar situation that can give tips on how to just go about my day-to-day?", "summary": "Huge emotional investment in a relationship that ends before I was ready, need to know how to cope with break-up + depression"}
{"id": "t3_26veyk", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by answering a booty call with an upset stomach (NSFW)", "post": "I was just sitting down to play with my favorite plug and a vibrator when my FWB texted me to tell me he wants me...I respond to tell him my current situation and that I was thinking of him, so he invites me over so he can fuck my ass properly.\n\nNow...my stomach's been bothering me for a few days, but I'm feeling alright, and the plug came out clean, so I figured it was no worries, right?  I'm sure you already know, that wasn't right.\n\nWe were fooling around with the lights off, and things felt absolutely amazing...I get off, then he gets off...then he pulls out and makes a sort of surprised sound...I glance at him at notice that he's staring at his dick with an uncomfortable look.  Then the smell hits me.  Oh.  Oh shit.\n\nHe was remarkably cool about it--grabbed a pack of baby wipes and we both cleaned up, he asked if I was okay, or if the sex was too rough, then assures me he's not upset and I shouldn't be embarrassed (of course, this doesn't stop me from being mortified).  The sheets managed to be fine, somehow.  We actually continued to hang out for several hours afterwards, and had sex a few more times before I headed home (though, we opted for the more traditional orifice after that...).", "summary": "answered a booty call with a burbly tummy, ended up shitting all over my FWB's dick."}
{"id": "t3_31pljj", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "20 Y.O. College student who will be making a decent amount of money this summer. Can you give me some advice to invest it well?", "post": "Hi /r/personalfinance. Sorry for the wall of text but I think it is important you know the situation.\n\n**Money Coming In**\nOver the summer I will be working as an aerospace engineer intern for an amazing company. I'll be making $18/hr at 40 hrs a week, plus overtime at $27/hr. At the beginning of the summer I will also get a $2,000 moving bonus. \n\n**Expenses**\nOver the summer the only expenses I will have will be gas, insurance, and money to spend on myself (. My mom happens to live in the town were I will work, so rent and all bills will be free (including groceries). I will probably spend around $35 on gas per  week (for 11 weeks) and insurance will be a one time payment of $400. \n\nMy goal is to put money in some account, fund or what ever it will be to use when I graduate in (2017) as a down payment for a new car. \n\nBy my calculations (45 hrs/week + bonus) I'll make around $11,000 this summer. I think I want to put $5K to $7k towards this fund. What's the best way to invest to have the highest return?", "summary": "wanting to invest $5K to $7K for 2-3 years and have highest return. Whats the best way to invest it?"}
{"id": "t3_fw59j", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I nearly died today reddit. Do you have any near-death experiences?", "post": "My story: I had to go down to the freezer on the barge, which is inhabited by pretty much a few people, to do a spot inventory on the food. As you can imagine, I forgot to secure the door open while I was inside it counting. \n\nSure enough, I hear it close behind me and panic sets in. Most doors have a lever on the inside to deal with this specific situation. This door had one that was not functional. It was later explained to me that you pretty much have to run full force into the door to get it to pop open.\n\nAnyways, after 10 minutes (maybe? time's funny when you're trapped in a signal-less box), one of the cooks came by and opened the door. Luckily for me, food was arriving this day (at this time specifically). Had it not been, it would have been 4 or 5 hours before someone MIGHT have come by.", "summary": "I was trapped in a very small freezer today and if I hadn't been very lucky, would still be there as I type this (3 hours later)."}
{"id": "t3_33lfxt", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "How do you know it's time to end a long-term relationship with a person you still love? How do I (24/F) know?", "post": "[24/F]\nI love my bf [26/M] of almost 4 years and care deeply for him, but I think that the romantic relationship just isn't meant to last. I needed him these last 4 years but I feel we've grown apart. He truly loves me and makes me a good person, we have a strong sense of trust and good communication, but I don't think we have the same plans, like he doesn't like camping and traveling and that's what I want to do all the time, as an example. There's a line between compromise and sacrifice and I don't think its fair for either of us. But maybe I'll never find someone who takes care of me like he does. I can't decide if my reasons are not worth losing him, although I would certainly try to maintain the friendship.", "summary": "I love and care for my boyfriend (26/M) deeply, but I don't think I will be truly happy long term. How do you when its time?"}
{"id": "t3_34zkih", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My mother [45F] wants to use me [16M] to force her religion onto my girlfriend of 18 months[16F]", "post": "My girlfriend is Catholic, my mother is a conservative evangelical Christian, and I'm an atheist (Though I'm not telling my mother that until she no longer has power over me). My mother pesters me to invite her to our church, and has been growing increasingly forceful and is making veiled threats to forced to break up with her.\n\nI can't exactly reason with her. She will never entertain the possibility that I'm right about something and will shout and bully people into silence. She vents her anger onto the people around her, which is problematic given that people disagreeing with her pisses her off like nothing else. I recognize that she's a toxic person, as awful as I feel for thinking that.\n\nShe resorts to screaming insults at me if she gets too upset. She belittles me, She has a tantrum, reduces me to tears, and then when she calms down she begs for forgiveness. It's not because she's genuinely sorry. It's not about me. It's about her and how she feels like a bad mother. So she pretends to be sorry and I pretend to forgive her.  I feel guilty for being this bitter towards her.\n\nMy girlfriend is a rather liberal catholic. She views Catholicism as a cultural identity mostly, in actual religious terms she's more of a universalist. Breaking up with her is not an acceptable course of action. I've grown far too close to her to accept losing her.\n   \n\nI've been getting by with saying that denomination is insignificant, but I doubt she'll accept that for too long. I have no qualms about lying to her to get her to leave me alone. I just want her to drop it.", "summary": "My mother is borderline emotionally abusive and a religious fanatic, how do I get her to stop caring that my girlfriend doesn't agree with her religiously?"}
{"id": "t3_22ad0s", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "how can i(27m) become close to my sister (23,26,34) and feel like a family again?", "post": "edit: i mean sisters\n\nmy whole child hood my sisters were rather mean to me and my mom always said to them, \"don't be so mean to your brother he is not going to want to be your friend when you all get older.\" that became the truth starting in about middle school.  we really started separating since they were pretty and popular and i was very much so not.  my youngest sister once told me that she didn't love me when i was in college.  \n\nwe are all now grown and they have matured and are not mean to me anymore, but i still find it hard to be close to them.  i would never go to them for advice or tell them a secret or just discuss my life.  when i am around them i still get very anxious.  no matter how much i know they are not that way anymore, i can't help about think how terrible they were to me and i just can't open up.\n\nmy sisters are very close and are always doing things together and they even all went out to get matching tattoos. they never invite me to anything, still, but i don;t think they don't like me.  i know my older sister likes me, she too is an oddball like me so we have that going. she was the only one to stand up for me when i broke up with my gf, while the rest of them and my mother   told me i made the biggest mistake of my life. \n\nif anyone has some advice or experience with this it would be very much so appreciated.", "summary": "my sister used to be very mean to me when we were young but they have since matured and i wouls like to try and become close to them but i get so anxious when i am around them.  please help."}
{"id": "t3_1illjl", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by mumbling", "post": "(Long time lurker just finding this subreddit, had to make account to share) So this was a couple months back. I was over at a friends house with a couple others. (All of them were females, I'm male) Its going fine, nothing out of the ordinary, we chilling cracking jokes. Later in the night one of them asks me if I want to sleep on the only bed with them, I don't see why not. So me, and 3 others are all laying in bed. After a couple hours we start to doze off. The friend that I'm practically spooning is still up. Her and I are talking, and she decides she wants to sleep. So, being the stupid person I am when I'm sleeping, I tell her she might wake up to me cuddling her, and to just push me off/away. She nods off. Fast forward to the morning. Everything is going fine, we finish getting ready and head to the fair that was going on near us. We all have a great time, and we all exchange our farewells of hugging and I love you's. Later that week(Still in highschool) I notice they are almost ignoring me, not talking to me much. I get curious. Talking to one of the friends that wasn't there, she informs me that my spooning buddy of nights previous, had misheard me, and thought I said I had a hard time keeping my genitalia in my pants. So everyone thinks I'm a disgusting pig for months, and I try my hardest to regain their trust. Fast forward to the present. I have regained most of their trust, but my spooning partner still rarely talks to me.", "summary": "Mumbled something while half asleep, got misheard, friend thinks I might attempt to fuck her in the middle of the night."}
{"id": "t3_1dwkrg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Roommate and bff of [22/F] locked in viscous cycles with [23-24/M]s", "post": "My best friend and roommate of 2 years is a great girl with a lot to offer, but she is atrocious with her relationships, specifically breakups. In high school, she typically dealt with them by overlapping her relationship with the next guy or girl. Consequently, she doesn't know what to do with herself when she's single. In university, she decided infidelity wasn't the way, but this made matters worse. Guy #1 was crazy, egotistical, possessive, and reserved most of his wit for knowing exactly what to say to make her hate herself. Their breakup lasted over 4 months. Every night was a bloodcurdling yelling match with multiple climaxes resulting in my friend screaming and crying all at the same time. At least once a week, she would remerge from her pit of despair and proudly announce that it was done with. She even attempted dating a little bit, but this only provided more fodder for her nights with Guy#1. During this time, I tried about everything, from sappy movie nights and ice cream (that never went uninterrupted) to taking on this guy. Had he not been clinically insane, he would have seen he was no match for me, but at least I tired him out. After that, the other roommates and I started looking for a new place to live, but suddenly, my best friend found Guy #2 and the fighting slowly ended. Because he had taken an effort to get to know me and because my best friend went back to Guy #1 a week later, I gave him some friendly advice when they inevitably had a fresh start of their own: \"Leave now, there's nothing for you here.\" Sure enough, it's happening again. Luckily, Guy #2 is only crazy, egotistical, possessive, and reserves most of his wit for knowing exactly what to say to make her hate herself, but he doesn't like to raise his voice. So far, I've just been ignoring the fights and keeping her busy. Now she wants to make herself available to this ongoing viscous cycle.", "summary": "Friend gets into heated arguments that always end in tears nightly as part of her breakup process. Last time this happened, it lasted 4 months."}
{"id": "t3_2u9m2r", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "prolonged chlamydia", "post": "College kid, poor, scared, and obviously on a throwaway. I understand I'm stupid and made a mistake. \nI'm 19 and in August I had unprotected sex with a girl and about a month later I went to the doctor to check out my swollen testicle, I became lighted head and fainted, he said that I probably had epidemimitis, but obviously they should run test. I felt okay because I didn't have any discharge/ any symptoms and after the cycle of doxycycline the swelling went down and I felt much better. \n- I did however miss a day (two dosages,(recovered the next day with 2 pills) and accidentally consumed cheese/ ice cream within' two hours of a couple of dosages. \n\nThis last week I was experiencing testicle pain, and figured I had epydidimitis. I talked to my doctor (at my college) and suspected that it was just semen going back into the urethra causing another infection since I haven't had unprotected sex since. my dad is a healthcare provider and works at that hospital, and they never called me back with the test results, I never called them because I simply forgot. I just called and they told me I had it. Oh my gosh I'm an idiot. \n\n-should I go in for an ultrasound(don't know the proper word) for my testicle to see if there is any serious damage?\n-should I get new medicine from my provider?", "summary": "have had chlamydia for 6 months, thought that 'my epidydmitis' was treated, and am now freaking out."}
{"id": "t3_3ljpyn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22 F] best friend's [21 F] ex boyfriend [23 M] cheated on her and has now moved on to my friend's friend!", "post": "My best friend (lets call her Ella) dated a guy (lets call him Patrick) for a very chaotic year. During this time he cheated on her with numerous women and manipulated her by telling her it was all in her mind and that it was all her fault that she didn't trust him.\n\nFinally, she took my advice on board and ended that toxic relationship when Patrick cheated on her with someone that she knew. The girl he cheated on Ella with was really apologetic because she had no idea Ella even existed and only found out because she was telling her good friend (Tam) who was also good friends with Ella and Tam recognized the name immediately.\n\nAfter the breakup she found out some pretty devastating news about him that explained why the whole relationship was so toxic. Patrick is bipolar and often goes for periods of time without taking his medication.\n\nElla has been having a pretty hard time letting go and on a couple of occasions her and Patrick have hooked up. The other week at his place she noticed him texting another girl (Rose). Ella told me about it and I never really thought about it until today when my friend texted to say her friend Rose was dating Patrick.\n\nI immediately told Ella. She told me if she had been in the situation where she could have found out about him before she would have wanted to know so that she could've avoided that situation altogether. And that she's happy for Rose to contact her if that is what Rose wants.\n\nJust making it clear that she wouldn't tell Rose that Patrick is bipolar because he is pretty private about it and hasn't told many people.\n\nI really need advice on how to approach this. I know Rose but not well enough to hit her with this kind of information and I don't want to involve our mutual friend. I'm also worried that she'll think I'm lying to her since he comes across as such a great person.", "summary": "my bestfriend's ex is toxic and he has just started dating my good friend's friend Rose. Do I warn Rose about him? If so, how!?"}
{"id": "t3_jgznc", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Just caught my boss stealing from the company.  He is part owner with my father.  We are confronting him today.  I need your help.", "post": "Just as the title says, folks.  \n\nI took pictures of a customer's truck loaded with product that has no paper trail and I watched my boss pocket cash that he had just taken from the customer.  I also heard the customer ask about which product was \"off the books\".  We previously accepted cash payments off the books, but stopped the process when sales declined...  Company is in financial trouble, but his salary could boost our bottom line if he was no longer employed.  We are confronting him before the end of the day and I need some reassurance and advice.\n\nThanks Guys/Gals, Don't fail me now.", "summary": "Caught my boss selling product for cash and pocketed it. Pictures to prove product left, no pictures of cash."}
{"id": "t3_368jij", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not knowing my girls eye color", "post": "Dear reddit, \nListen, I know. I'm like 30 and new at dating. Yeah, its kinda awkward. But that's not my fuck up. I mean, the whole situation, like my whole life is kinda fucked up a little bit...but listen heres what happened today. \n\nI try to tell my girlfriend I know when she lies. Total bluff. I'm smitten, I'll believe anything she says. But she calls me out. She wants me to tell her one lie. She meant one time she's lied, but I'm hilarious. So I decide to lie to her. \n\n\"Your eyes are blue.\" Haha, total lie. She'll prolly giggle. At least smile. I got her good. Heh.\n\nNope. Her eyes are blue. I'm a dumbass. After the awkward reveal, and it becomes the kind of situation where there is no way out and after my initial denial, it is obvious. I did not know her eye color.", "summary": "Tried to be funny, and wrongly guessed my girl's eye color while humorously calling into question her ability to tell a lie. Yeah I swear I'm funny though."}
{"id": "t3_2rvqb7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [38 M] with my wife[35F] 14 years and she is cheating on me.", "post": "Hello all, \nI have been married to this awesome lady for 14 years now, in the past 8 months, I have seen a lot of signs that she is into or cheating on me with one of our close friends. I don't have a prove yet, but I found his apartment extra key in her car, she always delete their conversation in texts. They always change the subject when I get in the room. Last night she told me she is going to the gym but she already check in a Starbucks store around his place. Moments later she deleted the check in.\n\nWe don't have kids together, my heart is already broken. I needed a prove! should I put a hidden camera in his bedroom? or ask her about it?", "summary": "I feel that my wife is cheating on me with a close friend, I don't have a prove and ask if it is good idea to put a hidden camera in his bedroom!"}
{"id": "t3_2nx7xd", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Help me get of the Hypetrain", "post": "Hello there fellow redditors,\ni have a problem and i need your help.^^\nHere goes the Backstory:\nI went to a friends party on the weekend. And there was this girl. I know her for quiet some time now and we have been sort of good friends. We hang out and had some fun. Now later that evening she would get closer to me and eventually we started to cuddle. There was also some kissing involved. ;)\nNow i'm currently working and living in a different city that is quiet far from my hometown(where the party took place). And when i come home i stay at my Moms place. My Mom is not that fund of me bringing home people she does not know in the middle of the night, so we couldn't go to my place. And that girl lives in another town, so we also couldn't go to hers.(Also i needed to catch a train earlier the next day) So i went home alone, even though she hinted that she would like to come back to my place with me.\nSo heres my problem. She is not that kind of girl that has lots of ONS or stuff like this, so this could turn into something more serious.(Which i would like) Now since that day, my brain went all like SUPER MEGA HYPE MODE activated. I believe this could be potentially bad. Do you have any advice on how to calm myself down? XD\n\nAlso English is not my first language. So sorry for all the grammar and spelling mistakes i made.", "summary": "Went to a party. Got all Kissy and cuddly with a girl. Brain goes all WHEEEEE now. Help me pls?"}
{"id": "t3_4uuqu1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16F] really miss my dog, but there is absolutely no way I can see him.", "post": "Recently, my birth family acquired a puppy. Cute little bugger of a Frenchie that would brighten my day immensely when I saw him.\n\nHowever, I managed to get away from my abusive birth family by going to the police, and since then a contract has been in place that I am not to go home. I don't want to go home either, but I haven't seen my dog in months and I really,really miss him. \n\nHow do I cope with this? Is there any polite way to ask my new guardians if it's possible to bring the dog over for a little while? I'm not even sure if my pup's around anymore. :(", "summary": "Miss my dog at home, but home is abusive and there is a contract by CPS that states I am not to go home under any circumstances. How to ask guardians if I can see the dog?"}
{"id": "t3_4ci5js", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "My ex is retaliating, attempting to damage the livelihood of my friend with benefits (she is our mutual ex). I'd like to get her to stop.", "post": "This is taking place in Austin, TX\n\nFWB = Friend With Benefits\n\nThe ex is Alice. Our mutual ex, meaning we were all three dating before, and then because of reasons, there were breakups, and now it's just me and FWB named Clarissa. Ex deserves to be upset, but this behavior is inexcusable.\n\nJust this past week, I gave up on being \"friends\" with this ex. She has been trying to convince me to break up with Clarissa for weeks now, and I finally gave up talking with her when she sent me with a falsified screenshot of a message (from Clarissa to Alice) implying something nefarious. I decided I was sick of the lies, and explained that I was no longer interested in staying in contact. I blocked her on every single digital communication medium I could (and her fake profile that she was using to get information from me). Clarissa has done the same.\n\nAlice most recently called in to Clarissa's place of employment, and claimed that someone fitting her appearance was smoking weed in her car in the company parking lot. Alice then makes an anonymous Yelp post saying the same. Clarissa's management took her aside privately and asked for clarification, and all agreed that it looked like someone was deliberately making a personal attack on her, so she still has her job.  The Yelp review has also already been taken down.\n\nI need to know when I can decide that this sort of behavior constitutes legal recourse. Obviously, I can't take away Alice's ability to use a phone or internet. If I got an attorney involved, would they say \"until she actually causes provable damage to someone physically or to their livelihood, you have no case?\"\n\nI'm not interested in retaliating. I already know that this individual thrives on getting a reaction out of people, and Clarissa and I are committed to not giving her the satisfaction.", "summary": "Ex is trying to hurt me and FWB because she can't have her way. I just want her to stop. I will not retaliate."}
{"id": "t3_21zybf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [f 21] boyfriend [m 20] said he loves me but doesn't want to say I love you.", "post": "We've been officially together a month, but we've been seeing each other since early January. Friends since middle school. I told him I loved him on Saturday, not feeling it was too soon. He was really happy and said he wanted to say it but was scared. I said I understood and that I wasn't going to rush him. When we were talking tonight, I asked him if he wanted me to stop saying it because I don't want him to feel pressured. \n\nI said, \"You know I love you, when you love me back you can tell me. I don't want you hearing it from me all the time and feeling pressured to reply with I love you too.\" He said \"I do love you, I'm just not ready to say it.\" I accept that and I'm happy he respects our relationship enough not to tell me what I want to hear. I know he's been hurt before, as we all have, but should I stop saying it to him? He says he would feel terrible if I stopped because he knows why I say it, (I never hang up/end a convo without it when I mean it, I've lost a lot of people in my life and want him to know I love him in case it's the last time I talk to him. I know, some people think it's dumb.) and he likes hearing it. He just isn't ready to say it back.\n\nI am not worried about him saying it back, that'll come in time. I'm not trying to rush him at all. I just don't want to continue saying it if it's doing more harm than good. I know it's going to be hard for me to do, but if that's what'll make him comfortable I understand. The last thing I want is to make him feel pressured due to my past experience of not saying I love you enough.", "summary": "Boyfriend isn't ready to say I love you, should I stop saying it to him so he doesn't feel pressured to say it back?"}
{"id": "t3_xghql", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Last night a moth flew into my ear and proceeded to flutter around like the spawn of Satan. What was your most uncomfortable but not necessarily painful experience?", "post": "I was happily reading a book on my iPad at two in the morning last night, when suddenly it felt like my hair was tickling my ear. I brushed my hair away, and it still felt funny. Little did I know, that was the bug crawling in! \n\nNext thing I knew it started flapping and crawling and buzzing right next to my ear drum. This has to have been the most uncomfortable thing that has ever happened to me. It made my skin crawl, and every time it moved there was an instant shot of adrenaline through my system, which made me almost hysterical while my fiance Googled what on earth to do to get it out. \n\nWe spent an hour following sundry advice from the internet pouring vegetable oil, hydrogen peroxide, and water in my ear to flush it out. Eventually it came out, but not until it had caused what may be permanent psychological damage. My ear will never be the same.", "summary": "Moth flew into my ear. Now I know what it's like to have the heebie-jeebies for an hour straight."}
{"id": "t3_1oxyb2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it worth dating a guy [30 m] I'm interested in if I [26 f] know I'll be moving soon?", "post": "We met a few months ago and have become friends. Unfortunately we don't get to see each other often because we live on opposite ends of town. Nevertheless, I've started developing feelings for him and never initiated because I take things slow. \n\nI've been gathering the courage to speak to him more frankly about moving forward, but now that I recently found out I'll be moving in 8 months I wonder if it's worth it. I know a LDR probably wouldn't work out, and don't believe he'd move because he's established himself at a great job. Sure, there's always the option of having a fling, but I'm not really into that.\n\nIdeas?", "summary": "Unsure if I should start  relationship when I'll be moving in 8 months and don't believe I'd do well in a long distance relationship."}
{"id": "t3_2i296y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] only seem to be interested in girls with a red flag. What do I do about this?", "post": "I just graduated college and I realizing there is a much smaller dating pool in real life.  I'm not unattractive but I seem to go after people who are inaccessible in some way. If they are available and interested, I seem to take less of an interest. However, if they are interested and unavailable, or have some sort of red flag, i am more interested. \n\nFor example, the last girl I dated was 3 years ago, and I was not allowed to share it with people because I was an RA and she was one of my freshman residents(which was not allowed). Ever since then I have been forcing myself into weird situations with girls that I just cant be with.\n\nMost recently, I am finding myself interested in a girl who lives in another country. I met her while abroad, and she had a long term boyfriend at the time, which she has no longer. I just need to stop getting myself into situations like this. I am a VERY morally upright person and would never act on these girls that are taken(even if they want me to) but I have to find a way to be interested in other people otherwise I will never find someone.", "summary": "I like girls with red flags(usually those who are taken). I won't act on my emotions, but how can I stop myself from being this way?"}
{"id": "t3_4ta4b8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23F]Ex hookup asking for abortion money from me [24M]", "post": "So about one month ago, I said bye forever to a girl I hooked up with a few times. The reason I said bye was because she had all the red flags: demanding, showing up unannounced, 20+ calls at once for next to no reason other than attention. \n\nSince then, I have moved country. So, I thought she was gone for good.\n\nAbout 4 weeks after we last had sex (unprotected, pull out.), she tries desperately to get into contact, in a way that sounds very much like attention seeking behavior: multiple facebook calls non stop, calling in the middle of the night, even finding my overseas phone number and calling it, yelling that she is pregnant.\n\nSo, up til now, it sounds very much like a fake pregnancy for attention or back together story.\n\nHeres where I am lost: She is asking for abortion pills(she lives in Ireland, a country where abortions are not legal), and asking me to get them for her(red flag). I think this is attention seeking behavior and have since blocked her.\n\nHowever, usually drama queens claim to be pregnant for attention of those around her, instead of asking for abortion. The timing of \"oh no I'm pregnant give me attention' seems off as well, being 4 weeks after last encounter.\n\nWhat does /r/Relationships think? Should I continue to just ignore this? Should I actually help?", "summary": "Ex Hookup claiming pregnant, asking for abortion pills. I am unable to provide. Not sure if attention seeking or real call for help."}
{"id": "t3_49b3xl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18/M] still can't get over ex [17/F]. I just want to talk to her.", "post": "It's been about 5 months and I've tried to move on and stop thinking about her but I just want to talk to her. The day after she broke up with me I was fine and kind of in shock. But then I messed up by sounding really needy after the week we broke up and she basically cut me off. sent 2 texts to her since, one on Black Friday and one on Christmas, but no reply. I would like to get back together or at least see her again or talk to her but I don't think she does. During the relationship she was saying that I was the best boyfriend she had and she has never liked anyone more; we dated for 3 months and I basically said the same. The day after we broke up, she called me because she said she had no one to call about an incident, someone very close to her is in the hospital, and basically said that she was scared of me and that when she broke up with me a weight was lifted off her. I don't know what to do. I have turned to alcohol this past month or so and I don't think it's good. Sorry this is so messy but any advice of how I could talk to her would be great. I'll answer any questions", "summary": "Girl broke up with me and cut me off a week after. I want to talk to her but I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4rnwth", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21/M] girlfriend [19/F] broke up with me after she went through my Facebook without my permission.", "post": "My girlfriend and I had been dating for 15 months. \n\n**Last week my girlfriend went onto my Facebook account and read through my message history with a couple of girls.**\n\nShe was **searching for a specific girl that I used to flirt with in the past, and she found it.**\n\nWe had fought one time before about me flirting with this girl, and I stopped talking to her entirely for a couple of months (obviously she didn't believe I did).\n\nShe found messages between the girl and I around my birthday in February, and her (message girl) birthday in June. Needless to say they were flirty but with no intentions of ever acting upon them. The girl lives in Europe and I live on the East Coast. But my girlfriend doesn't believe that I ever stopped talking to her, and that I was flirty throughout our entire relationship.\n\nI have no evidence to disprove this, except for the fact that I don't have her on social media anymore (excluding Facebook, which I now deleted)\n\nYes I know it was stupid for me to flirt in the first place, but I can't help but feel like there is a massive invasion of privacy and that she shouldn't have seen the messages in the first place.", "summary": "My Girlfriend of 15 months went through my Facebook messages without my permission and found old conversations of me flirting with a girl. She broke up with me and went no contact."}
{"id": "t3_1gffek", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Need some friendship advice", "post": "I've [26/f] known my friend [23/f] for about 5 years now, we met at work a year after i started there. Last year she moved to West Virginia (6 hours away), but we kept in touch via emails.\n\nIn the past she had this problem with following through on plans we made to hang out together. Sometimes she would come up with really stupid excuses about how she had to help her mom take out the garbage, other times i just never heard anything from her. Over the past few years i thought she had gotten better at this and stopped doing it so much, but it seems she's gone back to doing it again. \n\nThis past week she came to visit and stayed with another friend all week. We all hung out wednesday, i kept her updated on times and everything and she had planned weeks ago for the 3 of us to hang out again friday ( her idea). Well friday rolls around and i never hear from her, i considered texting but i don't feel like i should be the one to make sure our plans work out every time. It gets old real quick.\n\nShe also kept saying how she would come in to work to say hi to everyone on Thursday afternoon, never showed up. I would have understood if she didn't want to, i probably wouldn't want to either, but why continue to tell me she'd be there?\n\nI feel silly getting upset over something like this but how hard is it for other person to occasionally be the one to call and make sure our plans are still going on?", "summary": "friend made plans to hang out, i never heard from her. Got tired of always being the one to make sure our plans worked out so i didn't call and ask her myself."}
{"id": "t3_4xggec", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(sc) Having a child, mother saying she's going to deny me all visitation and screw me over on child support.", "post": "I posted here a while ago, but can't remember my throwaway. \n\nAnyway's, I basically found out that I'm going to be a Dad. The child is mine, unless she's lying. (Which she might be, you never know people are shitty)\n\nShe didn't tell me for the first 7 months she was pregnant, she's holding a grudge against me because I broke up with her. \n\nAnd now she's trying to say that she's naming the child whatever she wants, that it will not have my name, and that she's going to try and fuck me over as much as possible in child support. She's also saying that she's talked to lawyers and is pretending like she will be granted full custody, and that I will no be able to visit the child at all, and If I do it will be infrequent monitored visits. \n\nCan she do this? \n\nI want nothing to do with her, as she's an awful person entirely. \n\nBut if it's my kid, I want to be in his life as much as possible. This would be my first born child, my first born son. the continuation of my genes. \n\nThere's no way she could name it without me, deny me visitation and fuck me over on child supoprt right? \n\nIs the court system really geared that much towards women? this can't be the case. \n\nBasically, what can I do here? Can I have a say in the childs name, and what are the odds of her being successful in denying me any custody/visitation?", "summary": "Ex is salty because I broke up with her, chose to hide pregnancy from me and is now doing everything in her power to ruin my life. "}
{"id": "t3_zrydh", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[M22] trying to keep in touch with a [F20] away at college 3 hours away", "post": "Towards the end of summer, a coworker and I began hooking up consistently over a 2 week basis (hung out/hooked up many times but sex never happened due to outside circumstances). Since her moving back to school, we had a phone call where she vented to me about an issue with school and we have texted average every other day, some being short conversations and others well be conversing the whole day. I feel like I initiate conversations with her a lot more than she does with me, but she 90% of the time responds back.\n\nI havent spoken to her in about 4 days now, the last time we spoke was about how two of our coworkers want me to go with them and visit her at her school for a night or weekend towards the end of September. I was waiting to see if maybe she initiate so I can see interest from her but she has not tried to contact me. Some days i feel like I am overthinking way to much and others I feel like maybe she is slowly becoming disinterested. Am I crazy?", "summary": "Hooked up for 2 weeks oftenly with a girl with gf potential before she moved to college. Longest gap of no contact after speaking about a visit in the near future, not sure what to do?"}
{"id": "t3_50fonk", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "We were too late to Austin, TX, so where should we go next in hopes of finding a good living in tech or commercial art?", "post": "Hey Reddit!\n\nMy SO and I moved from Missouri to Austin, TX after graduation in the hopes of finding work in commercial art (we both have Graphic Design and Illustration degrees). After living here for a couple of months, some of my fears have become realities. We are far too late to really benefit from the huge boom that started in the late 90s, early 00s. At the moment, we are both working on learning web dev, in the case of my SO, and relearning Java OOP, in my case, in the hopes of being more marketable. But there's still a major problem...\n\nThe traffic here is a holy forking NIGHTMARE!!\n\nWe heard stories, but it took wasting 2 hours of my life in traffic today to really get to my breaking point. The highways are awful, and they aren't going to fix it any time soon. It would be feasible if we did end up getting jobs as developers later on and managed to find jobs within 5 miles of our house. However, there are so many variables and headaches around it that we're seriously considering just moving away the moment our lease is up.\n\nSo that brings me to a couple of questions:\n\n1. Does Austin offer any real benefit for tech jobs over other US cities? (Other than Oracle is getting ready to build a huge campus here)\n2. Are there any other US cities that are showing the same early signs of growth in the tech industry similar to Austin 10-15 years ago?\n\nSince most of the articles I have read seem to be outdated, or point to cities that have already grown a lot, we're hoping to get firsthand experience from people who live in these unicorn cities. We're also debating on looking for jobs in Dallas and Houston to at least just get away from this horrible traffic asap, but we're also wanting to consider the long game.", "summary": "Does Austin, TX, have any real edge on tech/dev industry jobs? Are there any US cities showing early signs of a population boom and tech/dev growth?"}
{"id": "t3_3167r6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] waiting to try and win back my ex [19 F]", "post": "I've been in a relationship with my ex for 3 years and I want her back.\n\n4 weeks ago, she broke things off for good after we got into an argument which involved my female friends who I have been in completely platonic and respectful friendships with. My ex never got to really get to know these friends as we were involved in a LDR for the past year and half which probably exacerbated the issue.\n\nI talked to her last week to get closure, say a proper farewell and she told me that she has realized that I was manipulative. I was not and the examples she gave were taken out of context and grossly misinterpret the things I've said. She also said that our relationship was always in a cycle where one of us submitting to the other for a couple months before we switched places for the next couple months. She didn't explain this very well to me, but I again disagree with her assessment.\n\nWe have supported each other through a great deal in these past three years. Life has been extremely unfair and I am not exaggerating. I realize that we are young, but I would rather not intimidate you with a convincing essay to tell you why I truly believe we are meant to be together. Just know that, these last three months have been hell for both of us and it definitely took a toll on us. I believe that her current assessments of our relationship are misconstrued due to the emotional stress that she is continuing to deal with from other events in her life. We were really great together before and it really showed. We rarely got to hang out with friends together because she had to stay home a lot due to her situation at home and we were conservative about PDA, but everyone knew us as the couple that would get married. It was our every intention to get married.\n\nMy plan is to wait one more month before visiting her in person to try and win her back. I only recently stopped making any attempts to contact her as she has been requesting.\n\nDoes my plan sound reasonable or should I wait longer? Should I wait to see if she'll ever come around?", "summary": "Girlfriend broke up with me a month ago. Planning to wait one more month before trying to go see her in person (we were in LDR) to try and win her back. Good idea or bad?"}
{"id": "t3_2vint8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [23M] Pursue [23F]", "post": "So last week I went out with this girl for dinner, first time hanging out with her. Before this I have only met her once, and got her number because she started talking to me at a mutual friends event. We started clicking because we are both the same age 23 had similar likes. Fast forward a month I decided to text her to go out for dinner and she said she was free the next night. After dinner later that night she texted me that it was nice hanging out with me and said goodnight. I felt that our date went well and I started to like her even more. Yesterday I asked her through text if she has a valentine and she said she is flattered, however someone has already asked her. Do I still have a chance?", "summary": "Does this context of the word flattered mean she's not interested or is it just that she's just taken for Valentine's Day only?"}
{"id": "t3_3ehwbv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [26] bf [28m] wants me to verbally acknowledge everything he says.", "post": "I'm not the best communicator in the world.  I have ADD and sometimes that makes it nearly impossible to focus on more than one thing at once.  My bf frequently gets mad at me for not listening.  Part of the problem is that I'll be reading something when he comes in the room and sits down, then he just starts talking.  I *literally* can't always hear him when he does this because I'm so engrossed in what I'm already doing.\n\nThis morning he said something that I didn't have anything to contribute to really.  I was looking directly at him when he said it, but he still got mad because apparently I'm still not listening if I don't have anything to say.\n\nI know I have to work on my part but how do I get him to understand that I can't drop everything all the time to pay attention to and verbally acknowledge every single thing he says.  I've explained to him several times that he needs to get my attention before he speaks and I've been working extra hard on keeping my ears open and paying attention.  How can I get him to realize that his expectations are unrealistic?", "summary": "bf says I never listen because I don't verbally acknowledge everything he says and doesn't understand that I can't."}
{"id": "t3_445ok1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me Thai [17 M] like my classmate [17 F] who is a Norwegian girl but my current relationship is preventing me from engaging to her.", "post": "Hello, so I have been liking this girl for quite a while now, but the problem is that I don't usually talk to my foreign female classmates as there's usually nothing interesting to talk about not that I'm not confident.\n\nNow, I'm about to graduate (around May) and I don't want to miss this opportunity, it's now or never! I want to tell her how I feel but I don't want to approach her in an awkward way because we rarely talk to each other.\nI'm also going to Europe to study abroad which I think goes the same for her. (current location is Thailand)\n\nI also want to include that she finds me attractive and she told my friend that I'm an interesting person (according to my friend who is relatively close to her) although I'm not sure if this is true or not as I don't find myself attractive, though few girls had confessed to me and I turned them down because I was waiting for the right person.\n+ I'm not shy but I don't have much confidence when it comes to women especially Europeans.\n\nPlease help me out, I really want to improve my relationship.", "summary": "I have feelings for my classmate and I need help to confess/approach to her before it's too late. :>"}
{"id": "t3_1x34ip", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Leaving the nest.", "post": "Hi there Personal finance, \n    Long time reader first time poster here so I'm in the midst of a very monumental stage of my life. I'm leaving the nest at 24 and me and my girlfriend are getting a place together, I would have done it sooner but with paying out of pocket for school it made it almost impossible to do that. So me and the girlfriend have set a move out date for April and are currently looking around for apartments in the 7-800 price range we both are trying to save about 2-3000 before we do go just in case of emergency which is easier for her but not so easy for me being a cook at a restaurant only getting $10 an hour an working 40+ hours a week. So I've come here to ask for your advice on how to save for this big move. I don't have any major bills right now other than a $380 a month car payment and I'll hopefully be getting a promotion at the restaurant soon and will be making anywhere between 13-15 an hour. So yeah help me out what should I do to save better? What should I do to prepare for the move and living somewhat on my own? How screwed am I?", "summary": "Moving out with girlfriend on my own for first time, need help on how to save money better and taking any advice on how to prepare for this move."}
{"id": "t3_3c0xyd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (20F) with my boyfriend (20M) will be moving in with 6 other people (20-21 M/F), how much PDA is acceptable?", "post": "This is just a simple question, nothing dramatic.  My boyfriend and I have been dating 2 years and will be living together next semester in an 10 person flat.  7 of these other people are single women and 1 is a gay man.  We're the only couple, and we don't know any of these people.  \n\nMy question is, how much cuddling is acceptable in common spaces?  There are 10 tiny bedrooms so there is private space for cuddling and such, but would it be awkward to do that in common space?  My boyfriend's pretty demonstrative and I'd like to know if this is something we should avoid.  Obviously no sex will be occurring at all, the walls are thin.  But should we keep our couple-y demeanor for behind closed doors?  What about hugs and flirting?  It may sound stupid, but from facebook stalking I've seen at least a couple of these girls post stuff about hating obnoxious couples.  A couple are also very unhappily single based on their statuses, and I don't want to rub it in their faces.  \n\nIs this a conversation I should have with my boyfriend before shoving him aside if he tries to go in for a kiss?  Or am I overthinking things?  What are the appropriate boundaries?", "summary": "My boyfriend and I are moving into a new apartment with 8 other single people.  We're not going to be having sex on the premises, but I'm wondering how much non-sexual contact is acceptable in common spaces."}
{"id": "t3_37hds1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21M] girlfriend [20F] of 14 months wants to eventually have a puppy, but I don't know if I'm ready to go through the emotions of having a pet again.", "post": "I've had my dog for 10 years and love him to death. My girlfriend wants to get a puppy years from now when we have a house and a yard together. Around that time though, my dog may or may not be around. I am not ready for the emotions that are going to come with that. \n\nAfter my dog does pass, I don't know if I'll ever want a dog again strictly because of the emotional investment. I'm pretty emotional with pets, and I love them to death, but again, I don't know if I'll want to go through that.", "summary": "Girlfriend wants to get a dog eventually (years from now) but I am not sure if I'll be ready for the emotional investment"}
{"id": "t3_4lcxdl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [36F] with my college tutor [45?F] - we get on very well, but best not to pursue a friendship?", "post": "I have a very good relationship with my college tutor for the past year - I've been able to go to her with any study issues/stresses I've been having and she's been great. She's always given me very helpful and practical in advice. I think we have a pretty good relationship, we also chat casually about other non-college related things. She sometimes tells me things off the record about what's happening behind the scenes at the college and we also talk a lot about our personal lives. The thing is... I may have her next year as a tutor (i may / may not - depending on subjects and scheduling).... would it be wise of me to try and pursue a friendship with her at this stage? Or too inappropriate?", "summary": "Want to become friends with my college tutor as we get on really well, but may have her next year. Is it best not to pursue a friendship at this stage, due to conflict of interest issues?"}
{"id": "t3_4y5vh2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [31/f] think i need to break up with the dude [29/m] i'm \"casually\" dating", "post": "I started \"casually\" seeing this guy, he warned me up front that he was going through the break up of a 4 year long marriage and it had only been a few months. \n\nSince he didn't really seem like someone I could see \"long term\" possibilities with I went with it anyways - he's cool and fun and that's all I wanted anyways. No rushin'.\n\nSince then I've developed feelings for him and he has been so great and cool about it all. He talks about me to his friends, we hang out with each others friends. Focus on not just having sloppy drunk sex, etc. Not really the stuff \"casual\" is made of. \n\nHe has started counselling and is focusing on himself and doing everything right, that he should be at this point.\n\nI, on the other hand, am feeling like it's a really bad time to be falling for him. I don't wanna put pressure on him to have to take care of my feelings right now - I think it will just lead to me getting hurt. Not to mention getting in the way of where he's trying to go right now. \n\nThe best thing I can think of is just pulling back and settling into just friends. Genuinely, without any ulterior motives. The problem is I don't know if i'd actually be cool with that - what if we are at a party with friends and he goes home with someone else? I'd be so bummed out. I try hanging out with other dudes too - but I just spend the entire time wishing I was hanging out with the person I actually wanna be making out with. \n \nIs there a way of being like \"hey call me as soon as you are over being heart broken\" ? Put him in my phone as \"call him in 2017\" ? Fake a \"just friends\" friendship till I make it (I'm sure i will - it's not been that long that I've had these feelings and I'll be fine) ?", "summary": "Fell for the dude I was supposed to be just casually hooking up with. How do i say \"hey call me when you aren't all messed up from your wife leaving you\"?"}
{"id": "t3_3z6gq0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26/F] with my ex[24 M] of three years, broke up with me because I make him happy. Now he wants to go date other girls for one last time before possible settling down. Emphasis on possibly.", "post": "My ex and I have been together for three years and he's broken up with me because he says I'm perfect for him and he's not ready to settle down. He says I make him happier than anyone ever has and probably anyone ever will. He just feels like he is too young to settle down. Is he stupid for letting go a relationship with someone that makes him incredibly happy? Or should I respect his decision?\n\nIs this bullshit? We've broken up in the past a couple times because of his desire to stray sexually, so I'm completely confused. He's matured a lot since then and seems more invested in the relationship (until, obviously, he wasnt). He either is bullshitting me, or is making a huge mistake he's going to regret.\n\nHe's claiming it's just a break he needs. But should I be okay with that? I'm so confused. He seems very certain and confident that he gets to have one last break to go play and party before finally settling down with someone who makes him the happiest he's ever been. Do I let him go and make him realize what he's losing, or should I be mature and allow him the time to grow up?\n\nIt still stands I dont know if he's bullshitting or not.", "summary": "My boyfriend says I make him really happy and I'm perfect, so he broke up with me. He wants time to play and party one last time before settling down."}
{"id": "t3_2bg4i3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my boyfriend [23 M] 2 years, He doesn't want to go to my friend's house for dinner, which one of us is being ridiculous?", "post": "So, a friend of mine invited the two of us over for dinner this week. My boyfriend likes this friend, but doesn't want to go. My friend has been renting a room in someone else's house, and my boyfriend doesn't trust that my friend's house will be clean (kitchen, dishes, fridge, etc), because he's never met my friend's housemate.\n\nI know he's a little germophobic, but I've been to her house and know that it's perfectly clean. Also, my friend is SUPER excited about making us dinner, and would be really bummed if my boyfriend didn't come.\n\nI can't force him to come, but nothing I'm saying is changing his mind, and I also feel really awkward coming up with an excuse for him to not come.", "summary": "Boyfriend won't come to my friend's house for dinner because he thinks her house might not be up to his cleanliness standards, not sure if his excuse is completely valid, or if he's being a jerk."}
{"id": "t3_2l90w3", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Almost every career in the medical field is saturated. What jobs are stable and pay decently now?", "post": "I honestly do not care anymore. \n\nExcluding physicians and dentist, I am so sick of reading up on forums about how one career path in the medical field is over now that it is saturated and that the job prospects are completely made up. Time and time again people are complaining how even years after their graduation, they are unable to find a job.\n\nRegarding physicians and dentistry (which was the career I was originally pursuing), the tuition rates have become insane. At this point the average tuition rate for dental school is about 400k and rising. \n\nWhat is the point of working so hard in school and in life just to come out of school with a monstrous amount of debt.\n\nThe physician career is out of the question for me. There is no way I am going to kill myself studying 7 additional years of my life just to be overworked the rest of my life.\n\nAt this point I would think working for Starbucks or Walgreens and working your way up the ladder would be a better choice.\n\nPlease offer me some guidance because I have a few major science exams coming up within the next few days and I have lost all motivation to study.\n\nI grew up thinking the medical field was the safe career choice. Where job security was guaranteed. That if you just work hard, you will be successful and life will turn out easy.\n\nI honestly do not see any light at the end of this awful tunnel of careers in the medical field.\n\nThe reason I am emphasizing the medical field is because I grew up with healthcare all around my family so that is kind of my background.\n\nPlus I will soon be graduating with a biochemistry degree.\n\nI am not necessarily restricting myself to the medical field so I do welcome any kind of career advice or suggestions.\n\nAny advice is appreciated. Thanks", "summary": "Life sucks if you don't have money. Medical field looks like its going to hell. What are some good careers right now?"}
{"id": "t3_27puc7", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Read a close friends journal. I literally feel sick.", "post": "A little context:\n\nHer and I have known each other for about 4 years.  We met in college.  Had classes together.  Had a short fling while her and her boyfriend were taking a break.  Now we work together (I got her the job), and we share an office.  Really good friends, I've always had strong feelings towards her.  I have a girlfriend of 3 years, she's back with her boyfriend of 10 years.\n\nWe also went to school with this guy, lets call him Roy.  Roy sucked, he was immature, inconsiderate, just unlikable all around.  Roy and my friend (lets call her Joyce) maintained a friendship, one I never really understood.\n\nA few months ago, she told me Roy was being stalker-y and wouldn't leave her alone.  I always knew Roy had a huge crush on her, and I told her to just cut off contact.  This went on and on for a while.  Now she said he's better and not bothering her.  Fine.\n\nToday I'm alone at my office.  She took the day off.  No one is around.  I noticed some of her journals she left behind.  I know I'm awful for doing it, but I decided to read some of the entries.  I still have feelings for her and I was wondering if I appeared in any of them.\n\nLiterally nothing but pages and pages of her describing her attraction to Roy.  Pages and pages going on and on about how much she likes him, times they've kissed, etc.  I can't fucking believe it.  To boot, I found an entry saying \"Roy isn't Awfulfriend4o9, he isn't easy to manipulate...\".  Awesome.  I feel like dirt.  \n\nI truly deserve this.  I asked for it the second I opened the pages.  I'm shaking with anger and shame.", "summary": "Read a friends/coworkers/crush journal, found out I mean nothing and creepy stalker means everything to her."}
{"id": "t3_q6o76", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Am I a horrible daughter?", "post": "My dad wasn't always a great dad. When I was younger, he was mean and abusive (verbally, and once physically) to me and my brothers. I moved out at 16 and didn't speak to my family for a very long time. \n\nFast forward a decade, and there was a tragedy that brought us back together. (My husband and daughter were killed in a car accident)\n\n5 years ago, I started re-building my relationship with my dad. We were both older, and sorry for things that were done and said, and we made amends. \n\nHe is now laying in a VA Hospice with cancer in his lungs, liver, and pancreas. His condition is rapidly deteriorating and he's already called for clergy. \n\nToday might be the last time I could see him alive. I am also 4 hours away from him. My last memories of my father are him being strong and tall and saying goodbye to me as I take the last of his belongings in the back of my truck back to Austin. He gave me a big strong hug and told me that he loves me very very much. At 31, I finally have the relationship with my father that I always wanted, and he's going to die within the week most likely. \n\nI don't know if I can handle the drive there, knowing what I am about to see, and then leaving him and driving the 4 hours back home, by myself. I don't know if I want my last memories of my dad being this sick feeble old man laying in bed not even able to speak more than a sentence at a time. \n\nAm I a horrible, coward of a daughter (only daughter) for not seeing him in his last days?", "summary": "dad dying, only had a relationship with him for the last 5 years, can't emotionally handle seeing him die. Do I go see him one last time? "}
{"id": "t3_3hob1w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17m] think this girl [18] is really pretty, but have no idea about how to talk to her", "post": "So I'm going to be a senior in high school, and she a freshman in college. She is going to be commuting, so she will be around, but she lives in the town next to me, and honestly I only know her name because my family knows hers from years ago.\n\nMy issue is that she doesn't know me and I don't know her, but she seems sweet and is beautiful, so how can I possibly get anything going?\n\nBTW I have never spoken to a girl before other than about schoolwork, I'm kind of a nerd who plays dnd, but I lift everyday and am in pretty good shape, but I have zero experience with girls", "summary": "girl doesn't know me, I don't know her, how in the world do I go about talking to her without being creepy, I've never talked to a girl in my life..."}
{"id": "t3_wflll", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the strangest coincidence that you or another person you know experienced? I'll start.", "post": "I used to write emails to myself every other day for my future self to read about my day's adventures and stuff. I had gotten in the habit of writing them after dinner. Well one day after some Chinese, I had opened my fortune cookie that read, \n\n\"It is time to write to someone who is distant\"\n\nOf course I was tripping at that and was freaked out a bit. I turned to other side of the paper and noticed my lucky number was 26. So I decided to go and write to myself and at the moment I got on I checked the time. 7:26 PM\n\nOut of fear, I NOPED my way out of there and hid in my room. I was convinced someone was watching me.\n\nSo Reddit, what are some of your strangest coincidences?", "summary": "I used to write emails to myself in the future. Opened a fortune cookie that told me to write to myself. Lucky number was 26. The time was 7:26"}
{"id": "t3_t6zp3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "a quick question regarding \"personal space\"", "post": "Reddit, my boyfriend (24) and I (f 22) have been dating for 2 years, and overall have had a great relationship despite ups and downs.  \n\nDon't get me wrong there have certainly been snags.\n\nHowever one thing we've always struggled with is personal space.\nI require less alone time than he does.  We don't live together, but we spend about 4-6 nights a week together. Many times in the past I have stayed at his house longer than he wanted me to.  At first he had an issue communicating these feelings to me.  He didn't want me to be sad or take it personally, he just wanted to be alone etc.\n\nHe has since worked on communicating this when it becomes an issue, and I have worked on not letting it get to the point where he has to mention it.  Just enjoying my own space, as well as giving him his.\n\nWe generally don't talk during the day (when we're both at work and busy I don't see the point in aimlessly texting).  \n\nLast night I called him and it turned out he was very upset with me.  He was mad at me because I hadn't contacted him that day.  I told him I was trying to give him space, but also I was busy.  When I told him I was thinking of him but didn't want to step on his toes, he said \"I guess.\" When I told him I loved him, he said \"okay. fine.\"\n\nWhen space is such an issue (an issue for a long time), how do I know when to give it and when not to?  What am I doing wrong here?", "summary": "boyfriend wants personal space.  when i give it to him, he gets mad at me.  what is a good balance? and why is he acting this way? any experience with this?"}
{"id": "t3_433ehf", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Landlord responsible for black ice falls? (TN)", "post": "Just curious what some of you think about this situation.\n\nAs you know, a snowstorm rolled through parts of TN last week.  Our parking lot was never scraped or salted during the multiple storms (we ended up with 8-9'' of snow/ice).  Over the weekend we had some warm-ish weather but since the snow was never scraped or salted, our lot stayed pretty slick.  Matter of fact, when I left for a work trip Monday morning, you still couldn't see the pavement.  I noticed it was getting pretty dangerous when I left that morning since I had trouble getting my vehicle out and the lot is relatively flat.\n\nAnyway, I get back from my trip last night and the lot is STILL slick.  Of course, I found this out the hard way as my feet left the ground and macbook/luggage went flying.\n\nMy wife saw me take a fall and immediately ran over to help, she also took a nice fall on the way.  Luckily, we're both fine.  My issue is this:\n\nI tell my wife I'm calling the landlord tomorrow to advise them I'm putting salt down for the entire complex and will deduct the bill off my rent payment.  She recalls an email being sent by our landlord to all tenants to NOT use any salt whatsoever because it ruins the concrete/pavement and they have their own 'special' formula to use.", "summary": "Parking lot is extremely slick a week after snow storms and landlord has advised us to not use our own salt because they have a 'special' formula.  Landlord has not scraped or salted whatsoever."}
{"id": "t3_15vyr7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I Met A Girl On New Years, And I Don't Want It To Degenerate Into Nothing", "post": "Firstly, I am 17.\nI spent the day camped out with some of my friends for a good view of the fireworks, and we got a really good spot.\nWe had a small amount to drink, so I was feeling a little more confident than usual. A large group of girls of a similar age soon entered the area, and we switched to alphamode and started talking to them. They had had a bit to drink, but similar to use none of them were drunk or out of character(I assume), so everyone was just happy.\n\nI found one who was really cute and nice to talk to. We got along nicely and there was the ritual \"Midnight Kiss\" so of course we took to eachother, and there was a brief exchange later. I'm not the most confident  of guys so this was a nice success. We promised to meet with the group soon, but as in life I feel this was one of many devoid promises that will never come into fruition.\n\nShe left to go to America the next day, and I left a message on her Facebook the day after which I had gotten, with a similiar message of hoping she has a nice trip and we should hang out. She didn't necessarily acknowledge meeting up but said when she'd be back, so I suppose it's the same(Ofc you can see I'm overthinking every work and grammatical nuance).\n\nWe haven't met up with the other girls, but I hope to to just keep the connection. My friend might have a free house soon so maybe that will suffice. I really just don't know how to progress, and don't want this to be one of dozens that falls by the wayside.", "summary": "I met a girl on New Years, both slightly influenced by alcohol. Kissed. Now she is in America for 3 weeks, and I don't know how to progress or how to continue this"}
{"id": "t3_29j7ok", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] has been on four dates with this [23 F] and haven't kissed yet. What should I do?", "post": "I met this girl about a month ago and we have been on about four dates. Recently she invited me to hang out with her best friend which I assumed suggests that our \"thing\" could be improving. \n\nAnyways, I've always heard that after the second date, if the two haven't kissed or anything more, that it is simply a waste of time and the girl is basically just using the guy. Short of bluntly telling this girl I like her, I've given her almost every indication that I like her by holding her, hugging her, etc. yet she does not reciprocate it. I'm beginning to think that she is just using me and/or just sees me as a friend. Before I mess this up, I just need your opinions as to what actions I should take before completely just ending this whole ordeal.", "summary": "Went on four dates with a woman whom I have feelings for. Nothing between us as happened even with me being completely obvious that I like her. Should I end it?"}
{"id": "t3_3kaix9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [23 F] give him [27 M] another chance even though he was flakey and indecisive?", "post": "On my phone so there might me formatting issues.\n\n I met an international student about 3 months ago who recently graduated and was in the process of interviewing for jobs. He was pursuing me very strongly in the beginning and showed his interest in me. Then all of the sudden his texts became less frequent and would take days or weeks to respond and would ignore any text confirming any plans we had. I asked him if there's something wrong and why he wasn't talking as much and I didn't get a response, so I assumed he lost interest in me and deleted his number off of the chatting app we used to talk on.\n\nThen about a week ago he contacted me again out of the blue to say he was apologizing for not responding to me with his reasoning being that he was doing a bunch of interviews, and now that he got a job he's asking me for a second chance. Should I give him a second chance or would I be a fool to do that?", "summary": "Guy was pursuing me then he fell of the face of the earth. He recently contacted me asking for a second chance and apologized for ignoring me. Should I give him a second chance or not?"}
{"id": "t3_2p5qty", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Abusive mother [ 48 F] refuses to stop being nude when I come home to visit my father despite years of protest. I'm 22F.", "post": "My mother is a Narcissist and abused my sister and I for many years.  She started walking around the house naked when i was very young (this is normal and fine) however she never stopped. At the age of 16 I asked her to stop. She never did she would \"forget\" every day. I would ask her not to every day until I moved out for college at the age of 18 and never returned. When I visit home for the holidays I beg her not to. She always does it anyway.\n\nI don't want to see her or associate with her but I come home to see my father who I love very much. My father refuses to divorce this garbage... so there is no escaping her. How do I get her to stop? I told her that I will press charges if I see her nude but I figure she will probably \"forget\" as Narcs often do. The solution seems to be light every piece of skin that I can see but don't want to see on fire, because thats how it feels on my end. \n\nI'm tired of the 'it's just nudity its no big deal' excuse. I'm a fucking adult I pay my own bills I have my own apartment and I wouldn't tolerate this bullshit from anyone else. I shouldn't have to tolerate it from my abuser that I'm forced to see for two weeks every year. I'm dreading this moment. I'm only up because I had a nightmare about her that made me dry-heave myself awake. I just want her gone from my life. I don't even know why I'm posting this you people can't help me. I'll just lie awake for a few hours.", "summary": "How do I control my abusive mother while I'm home for these \"sainted\" holidays? I don't want to see her naked anymore. I'm an adult; this is ridiculous."}
{"id": "t3_4fb8ld", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [29 M] with my ex [26 M]. Had been together five years but he cheated, I still can't help but feel a lot of guilt over the break-up", "post": "I've posted before about what was going on at the end of my previous relationship, and how I ended it because he'd cheated on me in the past, had been acting extremely suspiciously and then when we broke up and I was still in the house, slept with someone in our bed, which I overheard.\n\nI can't help but feel extremely guilty, despite the fact he's done all that to me. He's contacted me a bit since I left, saying he's ruined his life, he can't believe what he did and would take it all back if he could. What made me particularly sad was when he said he'd imagined us growing old together. It's really sad to think that that could have happened but because of some mistakes he made, which I just couldn't deal with, that will never happen. There was a lot of other stuff he did, like making me feel really bad about myself (making fun of my appearance, things like that). He was also violent a couple of times.\n\nSo yeah, I know it sounds really stupid that I'd feel any guilt after all that, but I do feel really sad for him. He's not had an easy life and is dealing with some health stuff which is quite difficult (I think he has some mental health issues which weren't being addressed, too). I sometimes have thoughts that I didn't give it enough of a chance, but I did take him back after the initial cheating and nothing really changed, plus I could have been in actual danger had I stayed.\n\nSo yeah, no question here really but I could just do with a bit of reassurance/people chipping in on their own thoughts and experiences right now. Thanks!", "summary": "BF cheated, treated me very badly. He has some issues he needs to deal with and I still can't help feeling guilty for having left him."}
{"id": "t3_ug0f7", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "19 years old. 260 pounds.", "post": "Im 6'3\", and roughly 260 pounds.\npic-\n\nLet me be honest here, I dont eat well at all, im a busy guy, ill order out daily, and get little to no exercise.  My weight has been floating around the 260 mark for about a year now, even with my terrible diet.\n\nSomething else to note, ive been fairly busy the last 2 days, eating maybe 1 - 2 meals each day. And ive dropped to 248 pounds, from 262. IN 2 DAYS!\n\nThis cant be normal, and it honestly has me worried.\n\nDoes it mean I have a fast metabolism? Was it water weight?\n\nI also want to start working to shed the extra pounds, heres a current picture. \n\nWhat should my target weight be? This is my at 260, looking like garbage.", "summary": "eat like shit, dont work out, dont gain weight, lose 14 pounds in 2 days without trying. Wanna do this the right way."}
{"id": "t3_3oeyqv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Unsure if my [48M] wife [40F] of three years actually wants me to join her in another city", "post": "Sometimes the pieces to a pattern emerge, and they seem ominous...\n\nIn 2013 my wife and I were living apart as she dealt with a death in the family back in Michigan. An opportunity to live in her former home of Seattle emerged, and we converged our careers there. A year into our living together, she was unhappy with her job and started traveling for work as a consultant 4x a week. I basically see her on weekends.\n\nSix months ago she was obsessed with a big, beautiful new house in San Antonio and seemed convinced that would be where we'll start a new chapter in our life. So we bought the house (we both contributed equally) and I convinced my employer to let me move my job down there. So far so good. One month before we're ready to move she gets misgivings about Texas, saying she didn't like the culture.\n\nNow my wife has accepted a new job in San Diego. So I'm making elaborate plans -- for the second time this year -- to transfer my career to a new location. It's not easy.\n\nTonight she said that if I don't like living there (who wouldn't like San Diego?) or if it's too much hassle for me to move my job that she's \"done\" adjusting her life to make me happy. She says I was bitter and difficult about adjusting to Seattle, and I 'ruined' the experience of living there by not agreeing to buy a house right away.\n\nThis floors me... as it seems I am the one doing all the adjusting to her changing demands. She says if she changes her mind about San Diego after a year or two, she's moving back to Seattle. \n\nFor the last two years she's also discussed getting a divorce for financial reasons (we get hit pretty hard with taxes, but the suggestion hurts..)", "summary": "My wife keeps changing her mind about where to live, to the point I am unsure if she actually wants to live with me anymore and I should just man up and ask her if she wants a divorce. Am I overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_y87pf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hey Reddit: Any way to find an old craigslist apartment listing? Landlord is fucking us hard.", "post": "The original craigslist post was here but is now expired: \n\nLandlord's rental agency advertised the unit with a private entrance and hallway and told us we could use it for bike storage, boxes, etc.  We've lived here for 3+ months and nobody has ever used this private entrance or accessed the hallway which is full of our belongings.  \n\nNow that we are complaining about repair requests which they've ignored for the last three months (like fixing the fan in our windowless bathroom or fixing the lock on the \"private\" exterior door which keeps getting jammed and locking us out), they're claiming the private entrance and hallway are actually common space. This area which they've forced us to clear out represents a good 20% of our already tight living space, so this is a big deal for us. Their actions are clearly a retaliatory attempt to fuck with us and serve as a foundation for eviction, which they've already threatened despite our clearing out the area.  \n\nFor what it's worth, the property was also advertised on the agency's website at metrorealtycorp.com but searching for the address turns up nothing. The listing is probably only saved in the agent's craigslist account \"prior posts\" area.", "summary": "Need help finding craigslist post which advertised \"private entrance\" that landlord now claims is \"common area.\" Link to expired post:"}
{"id": "t3_4ae7xb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do I [18 M] need a relationship?", "post": "I'm going to go ahead and assume that everyone who's been through their first year of college/university has been through such problems or may think of this as being super obvious, but I just want to get some general opinions on a very general question.\n\nI've just come out of a somewhat casual relationship around two weeks ago, which included a lot of dates and physical activity, but has, somewhat confusingly ended with being told that I am just liked as a friend (which I am completely fine with). So that's a bit of a small hole in life at the moment. \n\nAt the same time, my architecture education is absolutely killing me, destroying my personal time and stressing me so much. I've had to reduce contact with friends and have chosen to focus more on work. But in the time that I spent with this other person for the last several months, I realize now that I've distanced myself from my friends even more than I wanted to. They're all still very close but they simply expect me to be busy with other things. \n\nI now have an overwhelming sense of loneliness and (hopefully momentary) loss of direction as my education is confusing me so much. I am usually really good alone, but when nothing in life really seems to be going the way I want it to, do I need to find someone new? I spend all day at my studio and have little time to meet people outside my course. I've set my two closest friends up with each other, so now I'm sort of outside the circle. Do I miss attention or do I need something to impose my attention onto?\n\nNot really looking for the most serious or specific of advice, just maybe a little discussion.", "summary": "Focusing on my education has distanced me from most friends, and as I'm hitting a bit of a block in my work, I'm getting very lonely. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4p17a2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26F] with my cousin [22M] is throwing temper tantrum over taking my best friend [22F] on a trip for two and not him", "post": "Before i got into the full details for this post, i'm going to get into some back story. Cousin,  Charlie introduced me to my current best friend, Lesley. We hit it off immediately and developed a really strong relationship. while our friendship blossomed Charlie and Lesley had a falling out. To make it short Lesley didn't want a romantic relationship with Charlie so he cut her off as a friend, a decision that i still think was petty and immature. Lesley moved on but Charlie still holds negative feelings about it. \n\nFast forward to today, I've won a trip for two, air fare and hotel included. I immediately decided to take my best friend Lesley. I told Charlie since I was genuinely excited only for him to lose it. he tells me that we're no longer friends and he can't believe why I wouldn't consider him. i told him simply he doesn't have the funds to sight see and really enjoy himself in another country. I would most likely be footing the bill. And most importantly I don't want to go on a trip for two with another man that i'm not dating, that's just awkward.  We're probably going to share rooms and I don't want to be kicked out of my room so he can sleep with strangers. Now he's giving me the cold shoulder. I'm not changing my mind about the trip, I'm still no taking him. But how do I get him to understand my point of view.", "summary": "won a trip, decided to take my best friend and not my cousin. now he doesn't want anything to do with me. what can i say to make him understand why taking him would be a bad idea?"}
{"id": "t3_4qy390", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my good friend [18 F] of 4 years, share separate views about marijuana and she's turning all my friends against me.", "post": "My friend and I have been close for quite a while and she's always been abundantly clear about her opinion against marijuana.  \nWhile in college two years ago, I tried pot, wasn't really a fan but I didn't mind it; I told my friend about it and she was fuming, didn't talk to me for a week. It was very unpleasant.  \nShe did the only other two times I had tried it since then, she absolutely lost it.  \nLast night I found out that she had tried it and refuses to accept that she was unpleasant about it in the past or acknowledge that she was being hypocritical.  \nAfter telling my friends about it, they all sided with her, making me out to be the bad guy, I had a huge melt down and now they all resent me. What the fuck do I do?", "summary": "Friend loses it over me trying Marijuana, does it herself, confronted her about it with my friends, they all sided with her and refuse to admit she's being unpleasant."}
{"id": "t3_100qqv", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[22m] fell in love with [20f]...is our relationship unhealthy?", "post": "In the beginning of the summer, I was very bored. I just graduated from college, and I had to relocate to a new area for my job. I was in a social slump, so I turned to Omegle. It turns out Omegle works very well sometimes and I quickly became friends with a girl I met there. It was awesome because we had so much in common.\n\nWell 4 months have gone by and we're still talking. Our conversations have obviously gotten a bit more intimate and we're everything but a couple. Here's the difficult part- She's from Chicago and I am from Virginia. We talk all the time now, but when we get on with our regular lives (dating, partying, etc.) it's becoming very hard to not get jealous of other people hanging out with us. I've gotten to where I can't sleep sometimes thinking about what she may be doing and envying anyone who is with her. She's the same way. This is so unhealthy, but at the same time, I never want to lose contact with her.\n\nWe both know that the chance of being together someday is near impossible considering our future plans, but neither of us is willing to end what we have. A couple weeks ago, we tried to stop contacting each other just to see how it went, and I could not stop thinking about her the entire week. I eventually caved and texted her, and apparently she had been struggling all week as well. We are back to normal now.\n\nIs continuing this relationship and ignoring our doubts unhealthy? My feelings are growing deeper for her every single day, and I fear that we are only prolonging the inevitable.", "summary": "I'm in love with a girl who I can't be with- do I enjoy our time while it lasts or cut it short to prevent any further damage/attachment?"}
{"id": "t3_3j1s76", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18m] have a huge crush on a girl [17f] who'd rather be friends.... What do I do!?", "post": "Long story short-ish:\n\nI worked with this girl over the summer, and we were pretty good friends. About last week, I message her. She says she misses me. Like, a lot. Then I find out we have a mutual attraction, as in we want to date.\n\nThe next day, we plan to hang out at my place, and she says its ok for me to kiss her. We watch a movie and hang out, and then I take her home. Later I ask why I couldn't kiss her, and she says she'd rather be friends.\n\nWhat should I do? I mean, I'm ok with the friendzone, but I'm really in love with her... (note: I'm a freshman in college, she's a senior in HS. She also lives in one town part of the year, and another town a half hour away for the other part)", "summary": "I'm in love with this girl I know, and we have a strong mutual attraction. After a somewhat date, she wants to be friends."}
{"id": "t3_3himp6", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Being harassed by a girl I met on the internet and made some really stupid choices with. Help me please!!!", "post": "Last week I made some really poor life choices. I am a 20 year old male and I met a girl on OkCupid. Her age was 18 on the app but when we talked she said that she was really 17. We talked for a bit and sexted (no pictures whatsoever, only dirty talk). I am an incredibly lonely guy so she somehow convinced me to take a greyhound bus into another state and sneak into her house while her parents were asleep. We were NOT going to do anything sexual, just hanging out cuddling and kissing, stuff like that. I have never been in a relationship and I didn't even want to do that but I decided to do it against my gut feeling. So I ended up going and sneaking in and after about 2 minutes in her house we were immediately caught, I apologized, then I left the house and cut off contact with this girl. It turns out that she is 16, which is still within the legal age range.\n\nToday I got a series of terrifying messages on Skype from this girl. She said that the entire time she had planned on \"taking my virginity then cutting me open with a knife and making me love her or else she would kill me.\" Then apparently she overdosed because of me and said that her parents and counselors were telling her to file a report against me for all of this because her father is a lawyer. I am still receiving many threatening skype messages threatening both me and my brother who drove me home that night. \n\nI am terrified right now, she is saying that she's going to go into her office(she works with her father at his office) and is going to file a report against me tomorrow for breaking and entering, sexting with a minor, and causing emotional distress to a minor. Please reddit, help me out, I'm terrified right now and feel like I'm going to have a heart attack.\n\nI have all of the text and skype conversations with her saved but I'm about to pass out. I can't breathe and my arms are going numb. Please help me.  I'm in Pittsburgh and the events happened in West Virginia", "summary": "Made poor decisions, snuck into an underage girl's house, she's threatening me with legal action now if I don't decide to love her. I'm terrified and don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1njlcf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [22f] know if my crush [24m] is legitimately busy or just avoiding me?", "post": "Three weeks ago, I had very awkward, drunk, sex with a guy I'm really into. We'd been hanging out for a couple months. He initiated so I felt confident that he didn't feel pressured or like I was being a creep. \n\nSince then I have asked him to hang out twice and on both occasions he had plans. The second time he offered to reschedule for this week so I said \"sure how about wednesday?\" and I haven't heard from him in 2 days. \n\nAfter we had sex, he texted me the next day and we've been keeping in friendly contact. But I still feel like he's avoiding me. If he liked me and wanted to spend time with me, why can't he find a single day in almost a month to hang out with me? I don't want to seem clingy by asking more than twice and pushing the issue. If he wanted to see me, he would, right?\n\nSo where do I go from here? Should I just assume he's not interested? I can take a hint but I would rather he be an adult about it and just say \"hey I don't really wanna see you anymore.\" I'm tired of guessing and I thought I would ask for some advice rather than get upset and text him something I regret.", "summary": "Had sex with a guy and he's avoiding hanging out again. I don't know if he's just legitimately busy or disinterested."}
{"id": "t3_1qwqx8", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Disciplining our kitten", "post": "I have a 7 mos. old kitten who is overall a good cat. My boyfriend and I always joke that he is a good cat except for when he is bad. There are only two things that he regularly does that are bad behaviors: scratching the sofa and drinking from the fish bowl. He knows that he isn't supposed to do either and I know he knows because when he sees he is caught he stops and walks away.\n\nWhen he was younger, we used a squirt gun to try to deter him from such behaviors. It worked at first but he then got used to it and would just accept it. (He is now content joining in baths and showers) Then we tried hissing. I am not sure that really helped much either. My boyfriend now bites his ear for discipline. After each time he misbehaves, we chase him out of the room or area but five minutes later, he is back at the fish bowl. I have started to hiss at him while he is at the fish bowl, pick him up and bring him to his water and when he scratches at the sofa I bring him to his scratch post. Is there more that we can do to teach him to not do these behaviors or are we just going to have to continue to keep a keen eye on him?", "summary": "My kitten doesn't respond to water, hissing, or biting (from us or the dog) as a way of discipline. What else can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_jxlun", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Question for girls who have done online dating...", "post": "There are girls on OKCupid that I think I match up with really well (90+ % Match rating, to put it more objectively) so I get on my typing game. Crickets. Now, it certainly could be because they're not physically attracted to me. I'm no stud by any means, but I'm definitely not hideous.\n\nSo to the question: I'm certain that this varies from girl to girl, but as far as messages go, on the first one, what am I supposed to do? I think maybe I've tried hitting for the home run when I should have been trying to work the count. And if I try to make a joke and they don't find it funny, I've totally just given up on dating that person for the rest of my life (fffffuuuuuuu).\n\n Do you prefer a short, funny first message? A long, rambly \"Let me count the ways in which I believe we connect\"? (That sounds terrible. No one wants that shit, right?) Or are you looking for a sweet compliment (e.g. I noticed that you are X, and I think it's awesome.) Also are you looking to be asked for a date in the first message, or does that normally come later? You'd think the internet would make this easier. I think there's some sort of unspoken etiquette about this whole messages thing but I haven't quite figured it out yet.\n\nThanks,\n\nTemporarilyAlone\n23/m/aquarius\n\n(p.s. is there an online dating subreddit?)", "summary": "would maybe willing to pay a girl close to my age small random gifts on ebay to be an online dating coach. or to date me :S"}
{"id": "t3_1cp5hn", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "24F need to know how to break it off after 3ish years with 25M", "post": "I care for him, I really do, but lately I feel like it's time to move on.  Any time I mention something like this, he completely breaks down.  He is wonderful.  He is kind, funny, successful, intelligent, but lately I've just really had that feeling I need to be on my own.  It makes me very sad but everyone says I have to stop ignoring these feelings before it ends badly or I resent him or all those other things that can go wrong when you're not fully into it.  \nBut since I do care for him so much it makes breaking up with him incredibly difficult.  Last time I started saying \"I've been feeling like I need a little space,\" he cried so hard he started shaking.  I could not handle seeing him like that and I don't feel right just dumping him and running away knowing he will be by himself breaking down, (we just moved and he does not have any close friends in the area).  He really doesn't like his situation here.  He always says the only fulfilling thing in his life right now is me.  This almost-breakup scenario has happened maybe 2-3 times and I'm truly worried that if I just leave he will shut down entirely - like stop going to work, hide himself in his apartment for days, drink far too heavily, etc.  \nI know I need to do this, but I have no idea how to do it in a way that won't cause such an unhealthy reaction like before.  He doesn't seem to hear me when I say this is what I need and I know he will be ok; he just focuses on how horrible life will be for him and what a shame it all is that I want to leave what we have.  \nCould anyone please help with any advice on how to do this the \"right\" way (I know there's no right way, or easy way, but hopefully you get what I mean...)", "summary": "been feeling like it's time for me to be on my own, the last few times I've tried to say this to him it's caused such an unhealthy reaction I am too scared what will happen to him to leave."}
{"id": "t3_1k98uf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He (19, m) is refusing to accept that it's over and I'm (16, f) afraid to break him more.", "post": "It's been almost exactly 2 months since I broke up with my now ex. I explained my reasoning, and he seemed to accept it okay. I tried my best at no contact, but I did end up sending a few emails along the way to see how he was, explaining a bit more, etc. \nI am not sad about this anymore. Not in the slightest. I don't even really miss him, which kinda tells me I did the right thing.\nNow, I haven't emailed him in over two weeks and he continues to send an email almost everyday. They're so desperate. I want to tell him to stop, that it's over, seriously. I'm not replying and he's sending more and more, manipulating me in shitty ways. \nI feel like I should tell him to stop, but he's said that he'll die trying or that he has nothing else but me. He isn't in a good place in his life and I'm afraid what me telling him to back off will do to him.", "summary": "He's still desperate after 2 months. Should I tell him to back off, or just ignore every email he sends completely?"}
{"id": "t3_37b8bq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18M] with my Long Distance Girlfriend [18F] of 6 Months, am wanting to bring up the issue of her weight, unsure of how to do it.", "post": "I'm writing this out as I'm extremely tired, because it's kinda keeping me up, so if my grammar is a bit weird and my sentences start to get away from me, sorry.\n\nMe and my Serious Girlfriend have been in a 6 month long distance relationship. And while I do love her, and I don't believe anything will change that, I do have a slight issue with her weight. It's always been my opinion that you can be whatever weight you want as long as it doesn't severely impact your health, and without giving numbers I did some brief BMI calculations and figured out that she is on the border between severe and morbid obesity.\n\nThis doesn't make me love her any less, but it is something I want to bring up with her, because I fear it will impact her health. If things go as planned I do intent on spending the rest of my life with this woman, and I don't want any time we have together to be cut short because of something that we can prevent, even if it means eating healthier and exercising with her a few times a week.\n\nI just don't know how to approach the subject with her without coming across as an asshole. I'm actually going to meet her for the first time in person on the night of the 27th, and I know something she's anxious about is that I won't love her as much in person, which is why I'm making sure to approach the subject as gingerly as possible.", "summary": "Girlfriend is borderline morbidly obese and I want to bring it up with her and work together with her to get her to a healthier weight, how should I approach the subject with her?"}
{"id": "t3_4y7vr2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M19] Going to dinner with my G[F20] and her family, am I supposed to pay..?", "post": "So my gfs family (4 people including the gf) is currently in town. She invited me over for dinner this weekend and we're going to this nice buffet restaurant which me and my gf love. Per person the price is around $30. So this is the first time I'm meeting my gfs family and I know its nice to pay for dinner. I would gladly pay but I absolutely do not have that kind of money. Me and my gf both go to college and I don't even have a job. My parents provide me with money and if they see me dish out $150 for one night they will literally kill me.\n\nWhat do I do? Do i pay for my own and let them handle theirs? Or do I just let her parents pay for everything (I'm sure they will offer to)\n\nIm so lost at what to do...", "summary": "gf invited me to dinner with her parents and I know its common courtesy to pay for dinner but I do not have money to pay for 5 people."}
{"id": "t3_3h923c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Ex-gf camping trip.", "post": "Tonight my(20m) ex-girlfriend(18f) is going camping with who knows who and doing who knows what. I broke up with her a few months ago due to substantial trust issues and constant bickering, and because I knew that she wouldn't do it. It was best for both of us. That doesn't mean I don't still love her and care about her, and we decided to remain in contact as friends and kind of lay off on seeing other people. It's worked so far, but new allegations from her friends about me that simply put, aren't true, are causing her to \"retaliate\" and do this camping thing. For all I know some guy will fuck the closest person to me tonight. A constant cycle of sadness anger, and jealousy is storming through my head and I feel... awful. Not figuratively. It hurts a lot. I don't have many friends, I've pushed most away because of personal issues. And now this is happening. I know this will probably be the end of communication between us but that really just makes me feel even worse, not better.", "summary": "ex-gf who i'm still very close to may do something cruel tonight. Can't take it. Full post explains much better.."}
{"id": "t3_3hedzi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my now ex-bf[25M] together for 6 months, just need some kind words", "post": "Really close friends for almost a year, then dating, and we just broke up earlier tonight. Didn't tell a lot of people because he wasn't ready for his family to know due to religious differences. From the start I wasn't sure we would last due to said issues, but I was expecting some more time. Some things unexpectedly came up today and we talked for a long time about our future. We decided that even though we loved each other, there was no point in prolonging the inevitable and we decided to end things since love alone can't sustain a relationship. We decide set an optional deadline for one week to talk to each other if we need to, but I think I need a clean cut.\n\nI'm barely hanging on at the moment, and I just need some kind words. We didn't really tell a lot of people since we didn't want his family to hear through the grapevine. Best person to talk to would be his sister, since she knew and I was also friends with her, but I don't think it's fair to put her in the middle of this, even if it wasn't an angry breakup and there are no sides to be taken. Talking to a couple other friends that knew, but that's really all I have right now.", "summary": "Love isn't enough to sustain a relationship, and I need some kind words to help me get through my break up."}
{"id": "t3_33ue0w", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by referencing The IT Crowd at school", "post": "Obligatory this wasn't today, and instead was back on Thursday. I would've posted this then, but I've been caught up in revision and don't have much free time as of late.\n\nHere in the UK some schools (not sure if all) have a lesson period specified for P.S.E, where we cover everything from world events to psychology and stuff. In the case of my school, the usual 'forms' are split up so we are put with people from other forms in our year, which left me stuck with very few of my friends. For the lesson in question, we were doing something a little simpler: meeting new people. \n\nThe teacher decided that for the lesson we would partner up with someone who we normally wouldn't talk to in any other circumstances, and get to know one another. This in itself would have been bad enough for me, as I'm not exactly a social person, but to rub salt into the wound we had to have this conversation in front of the whole class.\n\nWe were each assigned a partner, and I was paired up with practically my worst nightmare: a typical jock; one of the most popular guys in school, captain of the football team, almost a foot taller than me and amazingly attractive (to the girls in my year). I crawled my way up to the front and stood there wondering what the fuck to say, when in my infinite wisdom it occurred to me: \"did you see that ludicrous display last night?\"\n\nMy partner just stood there, trying to comprehend what I had just said, the whole class sat in silence aside from my friend Tom who actually got the reference (only because I managed to get him hooked on the show a week prior) and Aliano (who was the subject of my last FU), who were both laughing their asses off. I could feel my face growing redder than a bloody stop sign, and I just walked off back to my seat and buried my face in shame, wishing for the day to end.", "summary": "Followed Moss' advice, was not unwillingly drawn into a robbery, but instead willingly made myself look like a fool infront of my class, friends and crush."}
{"id": "t3_e9sva", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Need help finding favorite childhood movie", "post": "When I was a kid there was this Looney Tunes movie I used to rent weekend after weekend for months. My dad would take me to our apartments little rental place and I'd immediately go to the shelf and grab it. No question. All I remember the movie being about was all the Looney Tunes characters eventually ending up and this AMAZING theme park. That was why I loved it so much, all of the rides looked like so much fun. So recently I've been on the hunt for it but can't find it anywhere. I'm dying to watch it again (and desperately hoping that rewatching won't spoil the adventure I found in it as a kid).", "summary": "What's the name of the Looney Tunes movie where they end up at an epic theme park in the end?"}
{"id": "t3_e615f", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Interaction with a professor during class: Should I be feeling bad about this?", "post": "Some background about the class etiquette: During the term, the class norm has been that you can either raise your hand to speak, or just speak during an empty part during the lecture. There are a lot of jokes thrown around and random comments made on the professor's drawings and what-not. Overall, the environment is pretty lax in terms of a lecture.\n\nThis is what happened: We were going over a lecture about a particular topic, and the professor was lecturing and making his drawings as usual. I had asked a couple questions during the lecture, and then during one drawing I made a random, funny (or at least I thought it was) comment. He immediately turned and said, in a less than friendly way, \"Okay, we could do without the running commentary.\" I felt extremely embarrassed and as though I had been scolded for behavior that had, up to this point, been considered a norm. \n\nWe took a break and I said \"I apologize if I was being disruptive during the lecture\" to the professor, and he just laughed and said \"You don't need to apologize, as long as I don't need to apologize.\" Regardless of his comment, I still feel really bad about it. I feel as though I was reprimanded in front of all of my peers, and I'm not sure if I was out of line or if he was out of line or what. It's a very confusing situation and I don't know what to think/feel about it. I am always paranoid that I am talking too much or asking too many questions, but have been encouraged by this professor and others to keep doing what I have been, so this is the first time I've dealt with this sort of guilt/shame.\n\nWhat do you all think? What kind of outsider's perspective can you offer?", "summary": "I was commenting during a lecture and the teacher snapped at me, now I feel really guilty and am not sure if it's my own problem or if it was rude of the professor."}
{"id": "t3_38bolq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] of 3 months, can't tell if I'm in love", "post": "So, I've been seeing my boyfriend for 3 months, and I almost said \"I love you\" to him last time I was with him. We were laying in bed talking and he made a joke about no one loving him. I almost blurted out \"but I love you\". \n\nI've never been in love with a guy. He's my first bf and I have no clue if love is what I'm feeling. I've been infatuated with plenty of guys, but I never almost blurted out I love you to any of them or even thought of the idea of loving them. This guy is different. I feel so comfortable around him, he makes an effort, and treats me very well.", "summary": "Never been in love. Almost said I love you to my new/first bf. How do you know you love someone?"}
{"id": "t3_2e5pww", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to torture a mosquito", "post": "Like most TIFUs, this happened several months ago on a dry summer night. I was trying to fall asleep a bit earlier than usual (around 11PM) because I had a job interview at 9AM, but kept waking up every 5 minute because of this one fucking mosquito that would just pierce through my skin and bounce without even getting a decent meal from my vasculature. My girlfriend, who is a deep sleeper, had already fallen asleep at the time but I could tell she was distressed because she was unconsciously scratching herself from the mosquito bites. This mosquito would not leave us the fuck alone and around 1AM, I tried to catch it by using my phone light to attract this fucker but he was so elusive that I had failed countless times. I decided enough was enough and went full psycho. I turned on all the lights (my girlfriend was still sleeping), and it took me a while but I searched every corner of my room until I found this small ass mosquito that looked fat as fuck from all the blood it had drained from my precious body. I didn't want to kill it right away because that just didn't seem fair for the both of us. It took me another 30 minutes to capture this bastard in my bathroom and I tossed some green GoldBond (I use it to cool my balls after a shower) on to this fucker thinking it would slow it down. I kept peppering this fucker with GoldBond and missed so many times until my bathtub and my girlfriend's bright pink towels were completely caked with this magical shit. The GoldBond seemed to do pretty well in slowing it down because I finally caught one of its legs with a tweezer and proceeded to torture and dissect it. By the time I went to bed, it was around 5AM and took me another hour to fall asleep from the adrenaline and stress the mosquito had caused me. I didn't wake up for my job interview.\n\nHere's some proof:", "summary": "Mosquito wouldn't let me fall asleep the day before my job interview. I went full psycho and sacrificed my job interview to get revenge"}
{"id": "t3_19ua0c", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Webcomics are awesome.", "post": "Fucking webcomics. So I've had episodes before where after I read something, or more rarely though it still happens, if I watch something, I get into a funk/mood. Usually it's a...I hesitate to call it a depression as I feel that that simply makes light of a very serious condition, but at the same time, it's not as far off as I might think. The biggest cause of the mood swing is something that I desperately find to be awesome/cool/amazing/etc. but that either cannot be reality, or that the reality is so far off it might as well not be.\n\nThis time, I was reading a webcomic about a biology grad student accidentally being zapped by a genetics-modification ray, resulting in a six-armed heroine going about being a heroine. Standard stuff, though clich\u00e9d. However this is beside the point. What the point is is that, while I had never really been a fan of the style of comic that this was before, the twist/originality in this one has really struck a chord with me, and has caused a funk.\n\nPart of the reason why I am going to college for what I want is so that I can right what I find wrong with the world, which is not unreasonable, I think. I want to be a Bio-medical Engineer and make cybernetic limbs for amputees (or daring clients), work on BCI's to make this happen, all that good stuff. However, mucking about in genetics is something that also interests me, and creating something akin to the heroine from the comic described above is something that is of great interest to me as well. Well, more specifically, having our understanding of genetics that be great enough to allow for that to happen in the future. But this is a very dangerous proposal as it would undoubtedly be turned into a weapon a la \"supersoldiers\", if it is even possible. Truthfully, I'm thinking it's more of the latter than the former, that the biology/physics involved in making hybrids is so far out of reach that it is not worth doing so for the reasons I would do it, not to even mention the innumerable ethical reasons to not do so.", "summary": "I want to be a mad scientist/engineer, but that's not what the world needs. Also, having six arms would be so fucking awesome to make up for the impracticality it would bring on."}
{"id": "t3_4ba1o5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [19F] sent me [20M] a snapchat saying she misses me", "post": "I know this is a stupid question but I'm really not good with relationships or reading signs or any of that so sorry. I was at a party and later in the night I put on my story a picture of myself and a girl I'd been hanging out with that night. In the picture she was basically hugging me with her arm and head on my chest and my arm around her. Pretty soon afterwards my friend (the 19F in the title) sent me a private snapchat of a selfie and her saying that she misses me. I checked my story and saw that she had seen the picture. I also had snapchats from earlier in the night that i believe she saw well before i put up the one of me and the girl.\n\nThis girl is someone i met in a class and I had known for maybe a little more than a month, we hang out a lot and I felt like I was receiving mixed signals from her about whether she was interested in me or not. So basically what I am asking is this a sign she is interested in me? Did she get jealous seeing me with another girl?", "summary": "I posted a snapchat story of me and a girl hugging. A friend of mine, immediately after seeing it, sent me a selfie and said she misses me. Is she interested?"}
{"id": "t3_2cvcke", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend is 13 years older than I am. My parents don't approve and I've been sneaking around to see him. Advice?", "post": "Ok, I'm an 18 year old girl. He's 31. I met him at a local restaurant I frequently go to with my mother about 5 months ago. He's the manager there.\n\nHe gave me his number and we've been seeing each other ever since. I told my mom about him at first and she said he was very nice, cute and had seen him many times at the restaurant before. When she found out his age however, she immediately disapproved and proceeded to tell my dad. They both came to a consensus that I was not to speak to him because he was too old for me. I was infuriated and told them I was an adult and could speak to or date whomever I please. \n\nAfter that, there was tension in the house to the point where I decided to move out for a couple of days. Eventually I decided to come back because it was too crazy for me to be living with different friends. When I came back home, my parents told me the only way I could continue living there would be if I stayed away from that guy AND if I couldn't abide by that rule, and decided to leave again, I wouldn't be allowed to take the car they got me. I wanted to act like an adult, I was to be treated like an adult with my own bills, they said. So I agreed. \n\nI still haven't stopped speaking to or seeing him though. I see him as often as I can and am always having to make up the dumbest lies to my parents about where I'm at and who I'm hanging out with. I feel like one of these days, I'm gonna get caught and my boyfriend feels very bad. He feels like he's going to get me in trouble and not only that, wishes we could have a normal relationship. No sneaking around bullshit. \n\nReddit, should I confess to my parents or wait till I'm more financially stable to move out?", "summary": "18 year old girl who's been sneaking around dating a 31 year old man parents don't approve of. They threaten to kick her out if they find out she's dating him."}
{"id": "t3_339tal", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "(AZ) I believe my friend is being extorted through her child.", "post": "So I have this friend who comes to me for advice, and I've told her to go to a lawyer over this (and she did), but I believe she's being extorted for money through her child.\n\nThe kids father happens to have a few children with various women. His family member adopted one of the kids he has (my friends kid.) as part of the agreement she signed away all rights at the age of 16 in order to never pay child support. She has since kept in contact with him and continues to be a part of his life.\n\nFast forward to today. The \"dad\" got sued for child support from another woman. He has a hefty fine to pay monthly. Now his family member who had adopted their kid wants to abandon the adoption and force the guardianship to default to the parents. My friend was pretty excited about this and wants to care for the kid, but now the \"dad\" says the kid might not want to live with her part time and that she should pay him child support (he's brought it up several times about how she should pay him child support since he's been sued.)\n\nAlso another weird thing was that he wanted to live with her. (It's pretty obvious he's had a thing for her the past 5 years since they broke up.) She's in a happy relationship and really doesn't want much to do with him. (After this he again brought up the child support.)\n\nThe lawyer she saw says there isn't much she can do because the guardianship is going to go to her and she'll have to help support the kid. My thing is that any money she gives this guy is going to go straight to pay for his other obligations, and not towards the kid. She's offered to help in ways other than money but he always turns them down.", "summary": "Ever since this guy got sued for child support he's being trying to find a way to get child support out of his ex."}
{"id": "t3_47q7h3", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "My house-mate and best friend needs to tidy up more, but how do I tell her?", "post": "I've been in a tenancy with other students for nearly six months now, and have gotten really close with one of them - the others just hide away in their bedroom. However, she's extremely messy now.\n\nI don't really mind things being super untidy every now and again - I get that it happens and sometimes we're busy. It's just it's out of hand. She never tidies up after having guests round (beer bottles everywhere), she rarely does her wash up - usually it takes her about 3 days to finally do it - and just leaves her belongings all over the house.\n\nIt's driving me nuts, and I need to talk to her about it but I don't know how without risking anything! Please let me know.", "summary": "Housemate and good friend is super messy, what's the best way to talk to her about it without ruining our friendship?"}
{"id": "t3_52cdp0", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "I need help with a kitty diet! Please!", "post": "Ok, so this is mostly directed towards my female cat, but I'm sure this could benefit my male as well.\n\nMy female cat  (Lodi) is a large lady; you can see how large she is in my post history. I used to free feed my babies because I grew up with outdoor cats and free feeding them never posed any heavy weight issues. Lodi, did infact used to be an outdoor mew. And since becoming an indoor mew, she has become obese. I do not want my male (Freud) to become obese as well. \n\nI feed them dry food twice a day;half a cup scoop. I'm not sure if this is \"too much\", but even with that, in the morning they meow loudly and chase me about the apartment as if they haven't eaten in days, so I feed them their breakfast. Then upon returning home they meow loudly and chase me about the house once more until it's dinner time, behaving like they haven't been fed in days. It makes me feel terrible.\n\nAnd if there's any concern in the food I give them, they get blue buffalo. So, is there anything I'm doing wrong? I want my cats to lose weight because I'm about to shave Lodi, she's so fat she cannot groom herself properly causing dingleberries and matting. I feel so terrible she's uncomfortable. But no matter what I've done she won't cut the weight and I certainly do not want to starve her! Please help!", "summary": "My cats (mostly the female) are getting obsese. I need help finding proper ways to put them on a diet and cut the weight."}
{"id": "t3_cn3qf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Any young redditors ever take a finicial risk to start a business?", "post": "I'm 18, soon to be 19 and have always had the thought of opening a business. Not sure on a specific type yet, mostly because I'm still really young, and only have a few thousand saved up.\n\nBut anyway, at the moment I'm working for a small franchised business, and it's poorly run. They still make a profit and have a strong customer base, but there are so many changes that I noticed they could make to increase profit, and their customer volume. This gives me confidence that I could run a successful business, because they are making so many mistakes that I would not make. \n\nAnyone ever take the risk to open a business at a young age? Even if not alone, with a partner, etc.", "summary": "The business I work for is making stupid mistakes which is holding them back, and I would not make the same mistakes. This gives me confidence in starting my own business. Anyone ever take the risk at such a young age?"}
{"id": "t3_4i24nd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my GF [27 F] (2y3m) - she has a lot of family drama going on", "post": "[Original](", "summary": "Girlfriend has a lot of family drama going on and doesn't have a lot of time for me. Am I being selfish or am I legitimate in feeling like I'm being left in the dust?"}
{"id": "t3_2b4255", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24F] am thinking about reaching out to my ex [24M] as a friendly gesture and need advice", "post": "My ex and I dated for over 5 years. We were best friends and had a lot of mutual friends. He was my first love and then started having an emotional affair with a girl in his class. The break up went on for months and it was really messy. We haven't talked in over a year and now I have a new boyfriend that has been living with me and things are going well. \n\nOne of our mutual friends has been my friend for the last decade. Recently, he was saying that I should reach out to my ex, that we should be friends or at least friendly and that he won't reach out to me because he thinks I still hate him (I told him I did when we were breaking up and that was one of the last things I said to him). The mutual friend is also thinking about having a birthday party in September and ex would be there. I hadn't thought about reaching out to ex in a long time, and am fine with us not talking. But I feel like maybe I should reach out just to be on friendly terms because it would be the adult thing to do. But I'm also scared that my current boyfriend would be upset by this. Idk I guess this mutual friend just got me thinking that maybe it's wrong to not at least be civil with each other after all the time we spent together. I can see from looking now that the girl he had the emotional affair with is still his top friend on his snapchat (I don't know if this should affect my decision). I really need advice.", "summary": "Basically just asking if I should reach out to my ex just for the sake of being friendly or if it's better to let it be."}
{"id": "t3_hiwpq", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I'm a fraud.", "post": "This all started out quite a while ago. I think it was somewhere in early highschool. You know the typical discussion between guys talking about their girlfriends. Not wanting to feel left out you claim you have a girlfriend. Combine this with never really getting asked along to any party and not really know any girls that never really changed. I guess the source of that was my lack of self confidence due to getting bullied in elementary school.\n\nBut now quite a few years later I'm still building up on those stories. I'm in college now and keeping up with the tradition for engineering students I still don't have a girlfriend and I still come up with excuses to avoid social events (though I've been forcing myself to attend some things). I still tell lies all the time to claim I have a social life though I obviously don't. This is further complicated by running into a girl last year that I actually did like and somehow managed to start talking to. Tried asking her out several times and she always said no and came up with an excuse (even though she was becoming more and more friendly). Eventually I got pissed at that and told her to fuck off as she was clearly not interested in me and was probably only doing it to get help. Weirdly enough I managed to never tell a single lie to her. I still like her at this point but I know it's pointless yet I find myself unconsciously fixing my schedule in such a way that I run into her. To the few friend-ish people I have at college I claim it's cause it annoys her but really it's simply cause I still like her and have fake hope. The thing is, thanks to her I did notice I need to stop this entire cycle of telling lies and really become more social. I just don't really know where to start and how. Making all those lies come true seems rather hard or pretty much impossible so I doubt that's the way to go about it. So where do I start and mainly how?", "summary": "Been telling lies to cover my ass for about 6 years and now want to stop and get a real social life instead of a fake one."}
{"id": "t3_1iqspn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "After a painful breakup with my ex(m24) of 1.5 years, I(f20) need advice on how to or how not to remain friends.", "post": "Quick background: My ex (m24) broke up with me about a month ago and basically I (f20) have been a completely mess because of it. I also did the unthinkable and pleaded to get back and work around the differences but that hasn't worked out. Anyway, it seems like he is doing fine and messages casually every week or so, just to see whats up, hows work etc. I, on the other hand, do not want to talk to him as that sets me back a lot in my progress and gives me false hope that he wants to get back together. \n\nHow do I tell him that I'm finding this difficult because this sets me on edge and I end up crying pretty much all the time thinking about it.  Please help me come up with a way to convey to him that I just can't carry on this superficial friendship where I can't even be honest with my true feelings and that I will only talk to him if he wants to have a conversation about us.", "summary": "how do I tell my ex that I cannot be friends with him and that he should msg me only if he wants to talk about something serious i.e. us."}
{"id": "t3_4hyugu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[28M] girlfriend[28F] moved in with a male roommate [28M] and started to get distant. Need advice?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for about 9 months, and its been rocky but we managed to work through it.\n\nDue to certain financial things on her end we decided to move in together but broke up and she moved out to stay with a friend. We were under a lot of pressure at the time with both of us losing our jobs at the same time; the companies we worked for went under.\n\n2 weeks ago we got together again and made up. It was great; I missed her and she missed me. We made love for days. She had also gotten work but it was a bit far from where I stayed and she moved in with a guy she met in the classified section looking for a roommate - she said she didn't have much choice and had to move quickly to be close to her new job.\n\nIt's been 3 days since she moved and her entire attitude towards me has changed. At first I couldn't get her off me, now she barley wants to talk to me or see me. She is spending a lot of time with the male roommate and it bothers me a lot, because even thought the guy is rather fat and not good looking at all I can see he fancies my girlfriend and keeps giving her things and is being overly nice. He seems to have some money, but wouldn't call him rich.\n\nHer car broke down and he even lend his other car to her, which is nice but the guy seems like over overly nice if that makes sense. She misses a few of my calls and disappears for hours and feels like she is insinuating she needs her space after we just gotten so close again, just out of nowhere. I tried talking to her about the situation and said how would she have felt if it was me living with a girl and just disappeared and seemed to have a real ball of a time with her and then kinda start ignoring my gf? Needless to say we got into a fight but we both apologized  but essentially the same issue persists. \n\nMaybe I'm just jealous but I'm really uncomfortable with the situation but at the same time that will push her away? So what the hell should I do? I love her.", "summary": "Girlfriend and i got back together but she moved in with an unattractive semi-wealthy male roommate and now it feels like she's pushing me away almost overnight. Need advice"}
{"id": "t3_4cjhpe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (25m) need advice with a girl (23f) I really like on how to maintain a healthy relationship.", "post": "I find myself in this stupid cycle with every girl I date. We hit the ground running and everything goes great for a while. Then as if a stupid switch is turned on in my brain I begin to find myself tripping over my words, making shitty conversation, and ultimately screwing up. I'm fairly introverted and one-track minded and I mainly blame this as the culprit. I'm a full time student who works two jobs so time to sit down and talk is not a luxury that I have most of the time. This makes me bad at maintaining frequent text conversations which in this day and age seems to be pretty much a deal breaker. \nSo the girl that I have been dating recently is amazing, an artist, loves to travel, funny, pretty much the whole nine yards. One thing that does suck is that she lives out of state, we have maintained what I view as healthy contact for the past month or so and we have visited each other a few times. But mentioned earlier I'm beginning to find myself in the same situation I always do. Making shitty conversation or saying something that makes me sound stupid. I don't know what to do. I know I need to be confident and relax I usually start out like this but I just lose it when I start having real feelings for someone. I hate it and it makes me want to live in a hole.", "summary": "I'm sort of introverted and one track minded. Pretty good at the initial part of dating but I lose it after a while particularly when real feelings get involved. The results are frustrating to say the least."}
{"id": "t3_t6gpt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Stuck in a perpetual cycle of yuck!", "post": "I am in the middle of the collapse of my (30f) 5 year relationship (41m). \n\nWe have an 18 month old together. \nI stay at home with the baby ,though I am trying to find work. \n\nAnyway, it's been not so good for quite some time now. His main complaint has always been I don't put out enough. Well, he doesn't give me any affection. It's a 2 way street. \n\nAt times, he is just an unpleasant person to be around. \nI am having a hard time even being attracted to him in this state . \nSo, sex has all but disappeared. \nMy last attempt at initiating sex was shut down faster than a drug deal at a police station. \n\nWe've tried counseling. I've left and cone back more times than I care to say. \nOur fights are getting nastier,close to physical a few times. I have a part in this as much as he does. \nI am starting to get a wandering eye and seek out attention from other men.\n\nOn paper,we make better friends than lovers. \nI just don't see it working and frankly,\nI'm tired of trying with him.\n\nMy problem is, he won't let me leave. \n\nEvery time we talk about splitting up,he tells me he won't let me leave with the baby, why do I want to break up our family,and so on. I do not in any way shape or form, want to keep our child away from him. \n\nI only have about $200 saved up so far. Which in California, ain't shit to live on. \nI am trying. The fact that I depend on him for shelter makes it a bit harder. \n\nI guess I need a pat on the ass or some advice on moving forward from here. Thanks.", "summary": "I'm done, I want to move on and have a chance at (all of us) being happy. Help me figure out how to do this!*"}
{"id": "t3_39bc6n", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "America, we've done this before. Get some freedom and fight back like it's 1899.", "post": "In A Nutshell:\n\nThere was a time after the American Civil War (or War Between the States for you folks that call it an invasion), progressing through the late 1920s, that can be referenced when we talk about income inequality, neo-feudalism, failing infrastructure, and rampant corruption. A nation run by Robber Barons and corporate tycoons that funded political and business ideology through bribes, muscle, and private security. Harsh anti-voting laws in some regions and a fight between labor and the establishment. It started to crash down with the Presidency of Theodore Roosevelt, saw a quick uptake, and then came crashing down with the Depression and FDR.\n\nReplace the factories and rail road/mining tycoons of yore with cubicle farms and banking/technology executives today and you have the same thing. Income inequality, Super PACs, and corrupt politicians/courts just begging for a little campaign financing for next year. This time around, though, we seem a bit more complacent. It's troubling; especially as a veteran who came home and realized that the 'freedom' we had shoved down our throats is a dying brand, silently being whisked away by the (name Super PAC here). I'd say those who realize it, want to fight it, and desperately want to fix both income inequality and crumbling rights are more patriotic than those who sit back and just fester in anger at what the media tells them they should be mad at.", "summary": "History repeating itself, robber barons are back, we sit back and drink bad beer while yelling at Fox News or CNN. (At least drink craft beer while being discconected and lethargic)."}
{"id": "t3_2pwsep", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[17M], my girlfriend [17F] wants me to bring more emotion into our relationship, but she never has time, and I'm fine with how it is right now", "post": "Together for 3 months, go to the same school \nShe wants our relationship to have more emotion, but she never has time for me. We usually see each other in the school breaks for a few minutes, and on most Saturdays. If I'm lucky I also get to see her on Friday nights. Of course on Sundays (and most weekdays) it's always \"too stressful\" because she has to do homework that day. So when, after waiting for a week, I get to have some time alone with her for a few hours, I just want to make out with her, but apparently she wants to to more than that (However she very much gives me the feeling that it is very fun to her, too). How can I make our relationship more \"meaningful\" so she is happier with it?\n\nI have no experience whatsoever, and I appreciate any advice no matter how obvious it seems. She's by no means the love of my life or something like that, but I like being in a relationship with her.", "summary": "girlfriend wants more emotion in relationship, but never has time. I'm not looking for a meaningful relationship, but would like to make her happy."}
{"id": "t3_16lb1y", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the most craziest lie that you've gotten away with.", "post": "I once pretended to be a big 1990's sitcom character( Psychologist) and emailed a 419 scammer( The Nigerian Letter Scams) pretending to be him..\nI managed to get another big TV character( A 1970's britcom hotel keeper ) to act as a lawyer/brother.. I had the lawyer go on a mental tirade involving a great deal of expletives.  The scammer sent me something along the lines of we no longer want to deal with that mad man.   He agrees to send his brother home..  I waste a day or two before sending them a letter telling them that the Psychologist was attacked by his brother with a tree branch and then used a car bomb to injure him.  I sent them a fake newspaper article with a IRA Car Bomb as the headline photo.  And they came back to me wishing me safe healing...", "summary": "Managed to convince a 419 Scam Artist that his customer was attacked by his brother using a tree branch and who then detonated a car bomb"}
{"id": "t3_4qhi58", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30F] am bothered by feeling that my coworker [31F] is being unfairly punished by our somewhat oblivious supervisor [40ish M]. I'm not sure if I should bring it up to the supervisor.", "post": "Our supervisor has every good intentions for coworkers. He is a good natured and caring person. However, his work style is somewhat unorganized and too trusting of the system because I believe how he is used to working. He is also very reserved and tend to not express his thoughts and concerns. My impression is that he tends to avoid talking things out.\n\nMy coworker, lets call her Mary, recently made the worst mistake that could have affected our company into millions of dollars of lawsuit. Mary was recently transferred/promoted to a new department. However, even though our nature of work is very sensitive and requires every attention to details, the department culture due to supervisor is, I believe, is too relaxed. She did not have any formal training to follow. She was just walked through what we do by another coworker. The mistake happened on the coworker's first go at the task. Unfortunately, the situation was just a little bit more complicated and she ended up making the mistake. \n\nThe problem ended up working out luckily. However, Mary was put on a week of no-pay dismissal plus 90 day probation. During the probation, she was asked to work on menial job for 90 days. The supervisor and Mary were supposed to sit down and talk about what exactly happened three days ago, but it has not happened yet. I told Mary that she deserves to at least share her side and talk about what happened for a couple of reasons; to bring it to attention that there needs to be proper training, also I feel it is her right to tell her side of the story.\n\nI only heard from her what happened. I intentionally avoided gossiping and talking about it with others. I feel strongly about telling my supervisor to talk to Mary. What I am worried about is that whether I am going too far or crossing a line. But I feel that since we work as a team, the conversation needs to happen.\n\nI also think it is possible that the supervisor may aware of the lack of training, therefore, trying to avoid his part of responsibility. But this is only my speculation. Am I going too far? What is the right thing to do?", "summary": "I feel that it is not fair for my coworker to be punished without proper means of conversations and ownership of the right responsibility by my somewhat oblivious supervisor. Am I crossing a line if I bring it to the supervisor's attention?"}
{"id": "t3_w6w5m", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I hadn't spoken to my dad (Who lives down the street) in about a week. Text him to find out what he is up to, and my Step Mom lets me know he moved to New York (We're in Utah) without telling me...What's the most insane thing someone in your family has done reddit?", "post": "So a little backstory, my Grandma lives in New York, and my Grandpa died.  She has 3 sons who live out there with her, but they are kind of jerks and not helping out as much as they can.  So my dad has loosely tossed around the idea of moving to New York...\n\nHowever he has a job, home, wife, car...you know everything here.  Well I texted my Step Mom (I said Dad but he doesn't really text) to find out what he and her were up to.  Usually see them every week at least...and she lets me know he moved to New York and left everything behind including HER! (She has a pretty legit job she can't just up and leave on.)\n\nOn the one hand I am glad what he is doing helping his mom out.  But on the other hand, I feel like it's just a little batshit crazy he didn't bother to tell me he was moving away, and left so suddenly. I'm kind of sad now because I won't be able to fly and see my Dad until at least next year...\n\nMy Step Mom won't be able to move out there for at least a year as well with the obligations they have here (taking care of the home they rent out, job, etc.)\n\nBut it is nice to see my dad do something spontaneous like this, he is not one to just up and really do something...especially if its completely change his life.", "summary": "Dad decided within the course of one week to just leave everything, and move to New York.  Didn't tell own son."}
{"id": "t3_4813j9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by taking a shower, thinking I was alone.", "post": "So this happened about 20 min ago. I had gotten done with my quiet night of gaming and decided to take a shower before bed. As I was brining my dinner plate downstairs I noted my roommate was out and about. \n\nA little info: If I know my roommate is home, I will take my clothes into the shower with me and come out with at least pants on, out of courtesy for another person. If he is not home, I may or may not have boxers on, depending on how I feel. \n\nAnyway, after drying off I open the door, and there are two girls standing outside his room, which happens to be directly adjacent to the bathroom. I was definitely not wearing pants, or boxers. Aside from the brief awkwardness, I shrugged it off and walked to my room, down the hall a bit. \n\nI don't tend to get uncomfortable, as being in the military really prevents you from being shy. Can't speak for them though, they seemed shocked for sure.", "summary": "Roommate brought 2 girls home, accidentally showed my jewels to them, may have ruined his chances at getting laid."}
{"id": "t3_1jfk72", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20f) am scared the friendship I have with my best friend (20m) will eventually end because of our stubbornness.", "post": "I've been friends with him for years, I trust him with absolutely everything. We are so alike that sometimes it gets dangerous.. like with our arguments.\n\nHe refuses to accept he is wrong. He will fight until he is blue in the face until the other person (me) accepts that he is correct and I am wrong.\n\nOccasionally he would do/say something to hurt someone, without meaning to, and refuses to apologize. I have been in a situation where he said something he should not have, making someone feel very uncomfortable. His reason was that the person egged it out of him. When I told him the right thing to do was apologize because he hurt their feelings, he told me \"Why should I apologize when SHE is wrong?\"\n\nWhen he realizes he did something to make me feel bad, he'll apologize sarcastically upon my insistance and much arguing.\n\nI've learnt to stop arguing all together. When my opinion differs from his, I've learnt to just shut up. But recently, it's been getting harder and harder, and I feel like I'm starting to resent him because of it. I am very good with accepting defeat. The problem is, however, that when I *am* wrong, he makes me feel- without meaning to- like I should be ashamed for being wrong.\n\nI've spoken to him about this countless times but we are both so hard-headed that there is never any conclusion reached.\n\nHelp? :(", "summary": "I feel our friendship will die because of hurt feelings, if he cannot learn how to a) accept that he is wrong or b) accept that having different opinions is OK."}
{"id": "t3_4y9rli", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Any one kidney runners here?", "post": "Hi All,\n\nFor most of my life I've been slated to give my brother a kidney. We've always joked about it and never really thought of it too seriously, but now that day is close. \n\nI'm not a particularly fast runner or an expert by any means. I've ran a marathon, I'm training to run a faster marathon and I plan[ned] to do my first ultra this spring.\n\nHowever, I don't know if any of this is doable with one kidney. I don't even know if doing a full marathon is possible. I spoke to my primary about it (she's not a specialist on the matter) and I'll meet with a nephrologist in a couple of months for an expert opinion. \n\nI'm feeling kind of lost. Running has become a part of my life and has made me a better human being. It isn't something I want to give up and I selfishly wish this donor thing could be put off for another 5 years so I can attempt my pipe dream goal of a 100mi ultra. \n\nI'm just wondering if there are any one kidney runners here to give me hope and inspiration for years to come.", "summary": "I will donate a kidney in a few months, but want to run ultra marathons one day. I'm not sure this is possible."}
{"id": "t3_39uw91", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21M] don't feel like my best friend [22F] respects me at all. She doesn't see her wrongs and refuses to apologize.", "post": "In short: Female friend massively pissed two of her guy friends off (me and my best friend) by letting us down after we'd planned something together for months, often rescheduling for her benefit and costing us a decent amount. \n\nShe's my best friend but I feel like this is a total lack of respect and she doesn't seem to understand why I'm mad at all. Her apology was one of those \"Can we stop arguing? I'm sorry. Good night.\" conversation-enders that don't really mean anything and right now I don't even want to talk to her. She's really fucked up and we have nothing to feel bad for but I feel awful for being mad at her and I'm struggling to not give in to her. She won't apologize - I know that 100%. \n\nIf i'm honest I'm kinda new to this. I haven't had many friends who I'm so close with that their actions affect my emotions and this is the first time I've ever felt so disrespected. What do I do?", "summary": "again: Friend pissed me and my best friend off showing a massive lack of respect for our time and effort and I'm struggling to stay mad at her even though I have a right to be. "}
{"id": "t3_30n9fi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] , and my grandma [65 F] have huge arguments about once a week so now I feel I can't tell her about my life", "post": "Okay so I live with my grandma and my mom and step-dad and little half brother/sister live in another house (close by though) \n\nthe agument start out with me ether me trying to tell my grandma about a problome I have in my life and then \n\nI getting annoyed at something she is saying then us talking about it back once or twice then her saying something inflammatory (something she knows will piss me off) \n\nI tell her I am getting mad so lets stop talking and then she expresses anger too and I ask her why she is angry and the response is always something along the lines of because you told me your getting angry and all I did was ask a few questions.\n\nThen we end up calling my mom who comes over and yells at me over what the oringal problom was saying the probloms my falt alone and it drills down into everyone just trying to hurt each other(including me witch I relize is wrong) and ends with me storming off to my bedroom\n\nand I apologize the next day for the hurtful things I said\n\nand never, EVER get and apology for the hurtful thing said to me.\nPlease give advice", "summary": "Grandma hates the idea of me feeling mad, EVER! and mom ignores the problome so I can't tell them anything anymore."}
{"id": "t3_135k0s", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, when have your personal religious beliefs, or lack thereof, been most insulted or oppressed?", "post": "When I was about 13 or 14, I had a neighbor, a nice, polite, elderly man who was VERY religious. He kept asking us, every single week, if we wanted to go to church with him, and me and my mom always politely declined. I'm an Atheist, and my mom is Jewish, for the record. \n \nSo, during one holiday, I can't remember which it was, probably Easter or Christmas, he asks us to go to church with him, and when we once again politely decline, he insists that it was important that we go because it was a holy day. It was then that my mom explained that she was Jewish, which he was somewhat taken aback by, but quickly accepted. However, the moment I said \"I don't believe in god.\", he was very clearly offended. \n \nFrom that day forward, every single day, he would knock on our door and remind me that I was going to hell and that the only way that god would ever forgive me is if I accepted him as the lord. He didn't care whether I was Christian or Jewish or whatever, as long as I believed that god was the creator of all and that I submitted my soul to him. He would always end our conversation with a typical \"Would you like to go to church with me this Sunday?\" and when I inevitably replied \"no thanks\", he would reply with \"Then you're going to hell.\" \n \nWe tried to ignore it, since we didn't want to start any problems, but it became so persistent, we eventually told him to stop coming by and harassing us, and that we were entitled to believe in whatever we wanted as long as our beliefs weren't hurting anyone else. He refused to accept that, saying that belief in god is the only path to heaven and that if you don't believe in him, then you will suffer in the fires of hell for eternity after you die. After that, we never spoke to him again.", "summary": "Old religious man finds out I'm an Atheist and harasses me every day that I'm going to hell until I finally told him to leave me alone."}
{"id": "t3_1bjt5s", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Do you think you're capable of cruelty? What if your brain changed so that you get intense pleasure from inflicting pain on others?", "post": "So we've probably all done things in our lives that we thought were wrong, and clearly just the belief that it was wrong wasn't enough to stop us.\n\nPresumably the desire to act outweighed the desire to do the right thing. But how far could that go?\n\nSuppose you had the opportunity to do something that (for the purposes of argument) we can all agree is properly wrong, like torturing a dog or a cat. Suppose you knew that if you did this, no one would find out, so there are no possible repercussions for you.\n\nOrdinarily the thought of doing this would be awful, but suppose your brain changed slightly, in such a way that gave you great pleasure and joy from torturing animals.\n\nPerhaps some of us think it's wrong to continue smoking, but the desire to have a cigarette can be so strong that it overrides our moral code. We bargain with ourselves and say \"Well, maybe just this once.\"\n\nPerhaps some of us believed that pre-martial sex (before you finish your karate training) or masturbation was wrong, but the desire to do it was so great that it defeated our commitment to be moral. We convince ourselves and say \"Well, maybe it's not *so* bad.\"\n\nSo what if you were changed so that you received intense pleasure from torturing animals? Even though you believe that it's wrong, would your strong desire for pleasure force your hand? There seem to be so many other times in our lives where exactly that happens.", "summary": "A hydrogen nucleus pukes in your brain and you now get intense pleasure and joy from torturing a dog/cat, but you still think it's wrong to do. Do you think you could stop yourself?"}
{"id": "t3_4amoxp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21m] super confusing situation with this girl [21f] need your advice por favor", "post": "So there's this girl I've been into for a while and I've been suspecting she feels the same. We've done light stuff like making out, ect. in the past, but she's had this on and off boyfriend for the last 2 years and she's known him for way longer than she's known me.\n\nRecently, we were drinking together and one thing led to another. We ended up on her porch making out and I told her how I felt. She told me she had feelings for me also and that she liked the thought of being with me more than her current bf.\n\nProblem is, she's leaving in four months to grad school and won't be anywhere near where we both are now. She's not sure what to do with the whole situation, neither am I. What do I do?", "summary": "Girl has boyfriend. Girl says she likes me now. I like her too. Girl's leaving forever in four months. What the fuck dog"}
{"id": "t3_2c0n8r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my FRIEND [18 F] for over a year, not sure if I want this", "post": "We met at the movies through our mutual friends. Later, we end up sharing stories and just getting to know each other. Boom. We just had became best friends. I had to admit, I didn't really find her as attracting as I am now. I was just comfortable telling her my how my day went, sometimes competitively play video games together and even going out with our friends. Since Valentine's day, she asked if we could go out to the movies. Thinking other people might show up, just her. As she was getting into my personal space, I did not think at all about her as a friend but as a whole different person. Knowing that I didn't have a Valentine's date before, she wanted to change that and that's where things go wrong. It is now July and we've been going on \"dates\". Out of no where, we have started to say \"I love you\". I'm not sure if this is what I wanted. We're not even considering each other as boyfriend/girlfriend and I'm wondering if I should push ourselves to be less intimate. She has been less open and is not taking as much interest in me. One day I feel like that is the problem and boom, she proves me wrong to just only have me come to that same conclusion. It is just like a roller coaster of wat.", "summary": "All in all, should I bring things back to the way it was before Valentine's day, progress into our relationship and get serious? I'm open to here alternatives. I do care about her."}
{"id": "t3_19suz6", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm (25/F) starting to date a guy (27) and I don't want to make the same mistakes", "post": "Here's the story: We met 6 years ago at his ex's house, who I was staying with because she's my dear friend. For all that time we liked each other but never did anything about it 'cause it'll feel weird. Last friday, my friend (his ex) was hosting a party and she invited us. She kept saying all night how cute he thinks I am, how he always talked fondly about me and what not. At the end of the night, she made us kiss and so we did. After that our whole relationship changed and my enormous crush on him was out in the open having a blast. We kissed 'til the morning light. He's sweet, sensitive, smart, funny and I spend the best time with him.\n\nThe thing is that I broke up a 2 year relationship with a guy 5 months ago because of the distance and loss of interest. When I say lost of interest I mean I lost all interest because he was 28 with no job and no degree and no nothing, I wanted to get married, have a family and lots of things but he didn't moved his ass out of the computer; I even helped him get up his chair and he fought me for it. Now I'm scared the same thing will happen with this guy 'cause he has a crappy-3-days-a-week job and also no degree. \n\nI've never been so crazy about anyone in my life, not even the guy I spent 2 years of my life with. I don't know what to think. Can somebody help me clear my mind?", "summary": "I'm scared that the new guy I'm dating will never get a job and we'll have to break up 'cause of that"}
{"id": "t3_160un4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25f] discovered husband [28m] had an affair - not sure what to do from here.", "post": "Throwaway because my spouse is a redditor and knows my regular username. I am 25 and he is 28, we've been married for five years.\n\nI recently found out that my husband was having an affair with a married woman at work - it lasted about two months. I'm obviously devastated, especially since we have a child already and I'm pregnant with our second.\n\nHe denies any feelings for her and says that the affair stemmed from his desire to feel needed and wanted, and that he's always been a people pleaser and just didn't have the balls to stop it without disappointing her. Once I found out, he finally got the motivation to cut her off completely.\n\nThat's his story, anyway, and it matches up with the things we've been uncovering about him in marriage counseling. I just feel so uneasy about that because it seems too convenient. The other woman was sending me texts and forwarding me things all in an attempt to show me how sweet he was to her (I've since blocked her), while he denies meaning any of it. Am I supposed to really believe that he didn't mean a word he said to her, but means everything he says to me?\n\nHe says he loves me and wants to fix everything, and he's been really committed to counseling and making positive changes in our marriage. I'll even admit that in general, our marriage seems to be better now in a lot of ways. I just have this nagging feeling that he was able to fool literally everyone in his life (the few that know about this have been completely shocked). \n\nI have zero experience with this myself or among my friends. Is it really possible for a guy to just \"fall into a dark place\" for so long and then snap out of it? Is it possible for a guy to fake genuine feelings for someone without meaning a word, but still be genuine toward his wife? \n\nAm I an idiot for trying? Can this even be turned around at all? I should add that he has a past history of dishonesty that I am always wanting to believe he has changed.", "summary": "Husband cheated. I have a hard time accepting his reasoning for things without fear of being with someone who is fake, and I'm wondering if there's any point in trying."}
{"id": "t3_30bi5q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] with my crush [21 M/F], a former group member. Should I ask her out, even though we barely had any 1 on 1 conversations?", "post": "Alright so four other classmates and I are assigned were assigned a group project to do last week. During that time, I started liking one of my team members; even though we didn't have that much 1 on 1 time with each other, I still felt attracted to her personality and smile (She always smiles when she is talking).\n\nNow the actual project was completed it a few days ago, so realistically speaking there's not a lot of reason to continue talking to my team members (We weren't friends before this group project). However, I want to at least hang out with/date the girl that I like to see if we get anywhere.\n\nMy school term ends next Friday (so next week is the last week of classes). After that are exams which ends approximately at the end of April. I don't want to ask to hangout around this time since school is wrapping up and a lot of assignments are due around this time. Similarly, exams are next month so I don't want to bother her then.\n\nTherefore, I was thinking of asking her to hangout after exams (We're friends on FB, so I found out that she lives in the same hometown as me via her profile).\n\nTwo issues are holding me back: 1. I haven't really talked to her a lot, or get to know her. I was hoping to do this via dates/hanging out. I'm not sure if this order could work though (Normally people get to know each other a bit first, and then start hanging out).\n\nYes, amazingly enough we live in the same hometown, but I'm worried that she would find it weird to hangout with a team member she doesn't really know back in our hometown, let alone at university.\n\nSo, question time: Should I ask her out in the first place? If I am going to ask her out, is my method a good one? Or is there another way to ask her out?\n\nThanks everyone for the tips.", "summary": "Should I ask out my crush who barely knows me (through a school project)? If so, what is the best way to do it given that there's only one week of classes left before exams?"}
{"id": "t3_44nmn4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27F] think a friend [28M] of mine might be into teens. Another friend [28M] suggested we \"catfish\" him.", "post": "Throwaway because he's an avid redditor and I don't want there to be any connections to me or my other friend whatsoever. We were at his house playing on Steam and while he was in the bathroom we went to the search bar to find the title of another game. It was then that we saw an endless list of sexual teen... everything. I know there's a lot of barely legal porn out there but the searches implied the he was looking for something more. But, neither of us feel comfortable going through his private info and we're confident if we asked him directly of course his answer will be no. \n\nWe were thinking of making a fake profile and seeing if we \"revealed\" ourselves to be underaged in a conversation he would still try to get with the fake girl. The way we see it is, if he bites, it'll suck that we have a friend who's sort of a pedophile but we'll have something to go to the police with. If he doesn't bite then the worst thing that can happen is that our friend is just really REALLY into hairless college girls. \n\nI've never catfished before so I don't know where to even begin finding images and such, but whatever. What do you think?", "summary": "We think our friend might be into the wrong kind of teen porn and we were thinking of catfishing him to confirm."}
{"id": "t3_1bgz6s", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "Advice needed. Thinking about putting my dog (4.5 YO medium size) up for adoption.", "post": "Throw-away here. My ex-boyfriend and I bought a dog together when we were together. We broke up January of 2012 and I received custody of her. We adopted her when she was just 8 weeks old. I've been toying with the idea of putting her up for adoption since we broke up because I feel like I cannot care for her like I used to when I was living with me ex. I would let him have her, except for the fact that he is a sociopath and we did not exactly have a healthy relationship. \n\nI've been living on my own since July of 2012. I feel pretty disconnected towards her, and seem to be getting angry with her. I do not want to be angry with her, and I do NOT hit her (I want to make this very clear), but I find myself getting more and more irritated. She always sleeps on the bed with me, but for some reason especially over the course of this last weekend, I couldn't sleep with her at the end of the bed where she ALWAYS sleeps. I kept having to tell her to get down because I was uncomfortable with her being there and I couldn't sleep. \n\nIs there a way I can fix my relationship with my dog, or would she be happier with another person (maybe family) that can give her happy attention instead of being annoyed of her 80% of the time? I know I'll be sad when she is gone, but it would seem selfish of me to continue to care for her when I feel annoyed with her most of the time.", "summary": "Been thinking about putting my dog up for adoption after break-up with sociopath ex boyfriend because I've been finding myself becoming irritated of her easily. Can I fix myself, or would she be happier somewhere else?"}
{"id": "t3_54i4j1", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Small lump on base of skull.", "post": "It's very small (like, a couple of mm in diameter) and about 2 cm to the left of the centre of my right ear. Wasn't worried about it, looked it up when I first noticed it like a couple of months ago, checked again and its still there. Pushing it is painless, it's kinda squishy.\n\nJust found another one I think? It's like, less than a mm in diameter, about half a cm from my right ear and also painless and squishy. Think it's near a vein or something, pushing the area down like... does something. I don't like biology much.\n\nI was ill with something a while ago and didn't go to a doctor about it (since I'm in the uk maybe I should've taken advantage of it) and it was the illest I've been in my life that I remember. Kept going to school which didn't help. From what I remember, throat was super painful, and walking home gave me super painful headaches. Also had like, slightly white things in my throat? It was kinda like strep throat I think, but not super like it. Only thing that might be linked somehow. Thing is, the lump appeared a while after it- several months.\n\nNo other symptoms with these lumps. Just wanna see possible causes, since googling them isn't giving me super clear choices.", "summary": "small painless squishy lump near right ear, been around for 2-3 months, doesn't seem to have grown, possibly another one near it. Also, I'm 16 and female."}
{"id": "t3_37fjm7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Why wont my husband sleep with me? Why is his hand the winner? 7 years [25F] [26M]", "post": "He is loving kind and takes care of us. He just rejects me sexually. Cuddles are great and plenty, but sex is once a month at best. \n\nWhy? He masturbates 3 to 5 times a week. Why is his hand better than me? \n\nHow can I fix this? Consoling is a no go, and divorce over this is dumb as my libidio is low. Im just hurt from rejection and him loving his hand more than my own body. \n\nHe wont tell me why. He acts embarrased. \n\nNo, he isnt gay. I translate gay graphic novels for a living... Im jot exactly close minded and he would tell me. Plus we live in San Francisco... great place to be out and about. \n\nSo, what is it? Why does he never want me?", "summary": "Husband jerks off a lot but sex with me is rare. Any other spouses like this? Why does my husband not love me sexually?"}
{"id": "t3_2dhfnm", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by asking a girl out with a note", "post": "First post, so please, only kind insults. \n\nThe horrible fruit of this fuck-up was reaped today, but sown last week. I work for a university, and developed a small crush on a girl (medical student) in another building who works in a friend's department. I began swinging by for \"coffee\" (i.e. sheepishly making woo and spending precious few seconds with crush) pretty regularly. Ostensibly, I was there to see my friend, while I actually was plotting to get a few seconds alone with this girl so that I could ask her to, erm, spend more seconds alone. She's pretty quiet, and though I'm not, we both tend to get drowned out in conversation by her boss, my friend, and another person in the department who seems to be constantly incensed by something or another. \n\nSo one day, after a frustrating encounter in which we (crush and I) both sat silently while other people in the room took turns shouting about the outrage du jour, I decided to write her a note. I was pretty cute about it. Wrote it on a piece of paper from the legal pad I had at my desk, put it in an official departmental envelope, then slipped that into a big interdepartmental envelope to be delivered. Bureaucracy at its finest. \n\nIt showed up today. Her boss decided it'd be fun to have her read it aloud. I was very gentlemanly and upright with this note, but it still managed to piss just about everyone off. My crush was mortified, her boss went on a tirade about how staff members (me) shouldn't date medical students (her), and my friend had to basically play my attorney/PR rep for the rest of the day trying to mitigate the catastrophe. The boss, in a move I can either describe as overly maternal or overly 19th century, forbade her from dating me. \n\nAlso, her boss is one of my references on an important application I put in with another department. So, ya know, that's pretty neat too, I guess.", "summary": "Wrote a love (or 'like') note to a crush. Crush was then compelled to read said note to her boss and the rest of her department."}
{"id": "t3_4xrpk6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do i handle doubts when i'm at a low?", "post": "I (19 M) broke up with my ex (21 F) about a month and a half ago. I'm pretty sure it was the right thing to do. Not sure if it was fixable or not. But i always feel like it couldve been. I guess that is what really messes me up. it was in an earlier post if you want the details  \n\n It sucks cause i've been going out alot, having great times, talking to new women, reconnecting with old friends and just pretty much forget everything else that has happened. But still even after all of this i can't stop thinking about her. \n\nI already know the basic advice im going to get. And yea i have done it. Don't have her on any social media, there is zero contact, threw out everything of hers, waited and waited, and i am still feeling like crap. \n\nDoes anyone have any other advice on how to handle this. I was inlove and I had to break it off. Even though i didnt really want to, i just had to cause it wasn't healthy. \n\nMaybe it's cause im at all time low in confidence, i keep myself busy but still get a little free time now and then and she pops up, maybe its cause i havent gotten any other womens attention. and the ones i have, have not come close to her on looks. Not to be shallow but i would like another good looking girl thats all over me and begging for me back. It just makes me think that i mightve messed up. I just need somethoughts and advice. \n\nIf you'd like to read up on it more, click the link to my older post. It was a horrible relationship i know. But at the same time it could always have been made better. Maybe im just being stupid.", "summary": "I've followed all types of advice, nothing seems to help. Am i making a mistake by not wanting her back even if its what i want sometimes?"}
{"id": "t3_uxasy", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you deal with someone that has impossibly high standards? What are your standards/opinion on standards?", "post": "My boyfriend has a friend that here recently has been coming to me for girl advice. This guy is 24, lives alone, works at Lowe's, is a huge jerk, and weighs about 320 pounds. I'm not here to say that only overweight people should be with overweight people, or anything like that. Hell, I'm slightly overweight myself. I'm just saying that from personal experience, you usually see an average looking person with an average looking person and a beautiful person with a beautiful person. I've never seen someone that looks like Seth Rogen with a girl that looks like Mila Kunis, is what I'm saying.\n\nThis guy sent me a message on skype and asked me what he was doing wrong when it comes to the ladies. Just to give you a quick idea, this is the kind of guy, that while he's socializing with others, you cringe in embarrassment FOR him. He thinks he's hilarious, and when he cracks a joke, there's usually silence afterwards. It's hard to watch. \n\nOh, and remember how I said that he's a 320 pound jerk that isn't funny? Well yeah, he expects to date women that are 120 pounds, stacked, with a perfect face. If he sees a woman with even a few extra pounds or boobs too small for his taste, or ANYTHING, he will point it out to anyone near him in disgust and claim that he would \"never date that girl.\" He has done this around me several times and I'm just floored every time. I've even had a girl ask me, \"Why does this guy think he has a chance?\" He keeps getting denied by these women and he seriously doesn't know why.\n\nHow can I deal with this and/or give him truthful advice? I WANT to say, \"Dude, you're a big fat jerk with standards that are way too high.\" But yeah...I know I won't say that in the end. Any ideas? Also, why in the hell is this guy like this?", "summary": "This guy is asking for girl advice and he is an obese jerk that has impossibly high standards. How do I deal with him, and also, what are your standards/opinion on standards?"}
{"id": "t3_f3jzh", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Falling for my best friend, who is falling for cocaine. LOST", "post": "he really is my best friend. nothing has ever happened between us, other than me (wasted) telling him i wanted to make out, he just dissed me and said i was drunk... at the time it didnt REALLY bother me cuz i wasnt THAT into him ( ok maybe a little bit). but now im really falling for him, but hes going into this whole new thing..\n\nhe's always been into drugs ( weed, acid, E) and so have i ( weed and acid), but hes going through some \"rough\" times now and is a bit depressed. last week he did cocaine with another friend at a club, he did it again this week, and when i asked if he had done anything other than weed, he said he was just drunk, which was obviously a lie (later confirmed by another friend that told me he had used coke practically all day..).\n\nhe knows that if i \"find out\" ill be ULTRA pissed, and make him stop using or just stop talking to him all together. i've considered that. but i'm afraid it'll just drag him down further into it.. which is something i really don't want. now i dont know if i just let him do it or completely ignore him... help.\n\nand yeah..cocaine really is a deal-breaker.", "summary": "hes my best friend, some sexual tension (mainly from my part, im a girl), but he started using cocaine. don't know wt to do about it."}
{"id": "t3_k8aae", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Advice on tramping around the U.S.?", "post": "Hi everyone!  \nA little about myself, I'm 25 married (wife also 25) and we have both always had some serous wanderlust. Recently we came up with the idea of leaving our old life behind and buying a motorhome and go wander. We both are dissatisfied with our jobs and have no possesions that we are terribly attached to.  \nWe plan on leaving Jan 2013  \nOur main idea was to work on selling as much stuff as we can until the day our lease is up (July 1st). By then we plan on having our motorhome and living out of that in her parent's driveway (lame I know) and continue working at our jobs until our tenative leave date. This will allow us to make extra money - almost entirely to be dumped into savings and to pay off any remaining debt. Then with only a month or so before we leave, we sell both our cars and wave goodbye to our old lives for a while.  \nThe trip is going to be open ended meaning we don't have a definite return date but our guess is probably a year.  \nWe plan to stop in towns and get basic labor jobs once in a while to supplement our savings.  She's excellent with money and can stretch a dollar. Also at the advice of [Cheap RV Living] we can also find jobs at campgrounds doing maintenance in exchange for a free site and after a determined amount of hours: cash.  \nOur biggest concern so far is lack of health insurance. Which to me, is nothing, I lived half my life without insurance and I rollerbladed, skateboarded, etc.  \nWhen we decide we had enough we plan on either heading back to our hometown or to another town we found along the way and living out of the RV but having real jobs until we can afford an apartment and rebuild our lives again. We both have handy skils I'm a truck driver and she's a certified English teacher.  \nWhat I'm asking is what else should I be worried about? Ideally, I'd like to hear from people who have done something similar.", "summary": "My wife and I plan on selling all our stuff and living a life on the road for a while. What should we know?"}
{"id": "t3_39b0t7", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Ear infected/blocked, how long will it last? :(", "post": "I'm a 25 year old guy from the UK, got asthma but nothing ear-related. Back story is that last week (monday to friday, today is wednesday) I went camping and on the last two days got a bit of a cold + hayfever and got nice and snotty. During the drive home my ears popped plenty of times. Fast forward to Sunday morning and I wake up with a blocked ear. I used drops and a syringe kit, got a chunk of wax out but still no better. By Monday night the tinnitus (which I usually have albeit quite low/quiet) was driving me insane and it was really getting me down. The non-emergency helpline suggested I go to the hopsital due to the driving/congestion I had on Friday. \n\nHospital accident and emergency department have a look (about 10 seconds!) and say it's a viral infection where the pressure changes have sucked gunk into my ear and there's nothing to do except decongestants and wait it out. Fine.\n\nToday is Wednesday, went to the see the doctor as it's not getting any better and honestly it's getting me down. He said much the same. Fluid behind the ear drum, no medicines etc... though after I explained my fear that it'd get infected and hence stay blocked for even longer he gave me antibiotics.\n\nPlease AskDocs, what can I do?! How long does this type of infection/blockage last? How can I make it go away faster?\n\nCurrently I have no/little congestion (my nose has been clear for the last few days aside from the odd hour or two) and my hearing is perhaps 10% of what it should be in that ear. In terms of abient noise... yeah right... headphones (over, not in-ear!) give me a bit of sound. \n\nEven just having an ETA on when it will GTFO would be great as it feels like it just wont go away :(", "summary": "Middle ear infection/blockage, started Sunday morning early hours, it's now evening on Wednsday, what do and how long?"}
{"id": "t3_17uhvj", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [19/m] broke up with girlfriend [20/f] of 3 years. Few months later I am still conflicted if it was right.", "post": "I am a Sophomore in college and my girlfriend and I had dated since junior year of High School. Senior year I started pondering the possibilities of breaking up because of dating whoever I may in college. i am not the type to sleep around, but I had never dated anyone else before. We were VERY open and we discussed breaking up for that reason a few times, but I kept stopping because I really loved her. My sophomore year of College I finally got to a point where I figured that I will never be able to have a college opportunity again and that I really should end it. We were having some issues at the time as well because I wasn't paying her enough attention and I was frustrated with her about a few different things and I believed we would be able to help each other grow as people if we were friends. A few months later now I am having regrets because she was my best friend and I could handle all this fine if she was talking to me and I believe she will one day, but I don't know. I just am worried that I threw something away that was good for something that wasn't important enough like experiencing dating new people. I guess I am just looking for confirmation of whether this sounds like these were good enough reasons or not :/ Thank you. If any questions about other reason for ending it just  ask. Just trying to limit too much information or making it into a rant.", "summary": "I broke up with my girlfriend after a year in college because we were having some various issues and I really wanted to experience dating someone else because I never have. Was that really a good enough reason?"}
{"id": "t3_1eac5o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Update: My Husband (24M) has been out of work for a year and half and is becoming depressed. I (22F) don't know how to help.", "post": "Here is the link to the [Original Post] \n\nJust a recap we have been married for 8 months. I'm a 22F and my husband is a 24M.\n\nThank you everyone for your advice when it came to my husband. I sat him down and told him that I supported him 100% but that I was working full time and needed him to work at finding a job on his own. I told him that I was here to answer any questions about applications he might have. He seemed to really take it to heart. He has really been knocking the applications out and has applied to 15+ places in the last few days. \n\nHe's been realizing that even if it's just part time it is something to put on his resume to show that he's working. He's looking at it in the perspective of, get a job now and look for something better. That way he still has an income to contribute and can work on finding something with more hours/better pay. \n\nHis depression is getting better now, too. I think me working 40 hours a week was eating at him and now that he's really trying harder to find a job, he seems happier. I know he's still struggling a bit with everything. I'm not expecting 100% improvement in a matter of days. I know it will take awhile for him to get back to his normal self. I have high hopes for him. Thanks for your advice /r/relationships!", "summary": "My husband is working harder to get a job. He seems to be happier. I'm not expecting things to get 100% better, but everything seems to be looking up."}
{"id": "t3_1bkcjq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Long distance relationship trust [26F/27M]", "post": "I [26F] met by boyfriend [27M] my freshman year in college and we were each other's first real relationship. We have been dating for 6+ years, and lived together for 2, until I recently moved out of state for graduate school this past year. Ever since we have been long distance it seems like any small problem we have had in the past has just become magnified, and with the limited time and resources to see each other, our relationship has been stressed and we have been having a lot of arguments.\n\nOne of his close friends is going through a divorce, and ever since he found out he was really pushed away from me and keeps bringing up our problems. The thing that is bothering me is that, I knew he was friends with the divorcing couple since high school, but I thought he was closer to the guy friend. He was trying to be there for both of them, but the guy fell off the map and he is always talking with the girl discussing her problems and our relationship problems. I get the phone bill and see that during the time he needed \"space\" he has just been texting her back and forth throughout the day and night. When I came to visit last weekend, he even got texts from her at 2-3 am, which he renamed under a GUY friends name so I wouldn't know. He even lied to my face about who it was. My gut told me it wasn't, so I checked the phone bill and it was the girl.\n\nNow I know we are having problems, and I admit that 50% of that is my fault and being deceitful is 100% on him, but I don't know if I can trust him with a long distance relationship. I asked him to the see the conversation but he had deleted it because he said that her divorce was private or they were talking about problems in our relationship. We have talked about marriage and our future, so I do really believe we had a very serious relationship. Am I being naive to think that this is just due to the stress of our relationship right now? Can you recover trust in a long distance relationship or is it over?", "summary": "Boyfriend of 6 years (long distance for 1) has been texting female friend who is getting a divorce night and day and lying about it. Is it time to call it quits on first love?"}
{"id": "t3_sz2uu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'd like to know if I'm being unreasonable here...", "post": "First off, thank you for taking some time to read this. Here it goes...\n\nSo back when my friend and I dated, she was into heavy drinking and smoking weed. Since she was 16, I really didn't care about it that much. It bothered me that she would be drinking so heavily at such a young age, but it's her body and I have no say in it.\n\nWhen I told her to do whatever makes her happy, she took that as, \"Stop smoking weed and drinking.\" I was happy she quit both, but it didn't really bother me.\n\nWell apparently I was being a \"control freak,\" and when we broke up she kept telling everyone how I would control her every move.\n\nThinking back, I was pretty controlling. I would guilt her into doing things. However, none of these things were bad. It's not like I convinced her to have sex with me or anything... it was more like, \"Hey, try this new food. It's healthy! You might like it! Come on, please? For me?\"\n\nSo here's the deal: we might get back together because we've both changed. However, she's a smoker.\n\nTHIS bothers me. Why does this bother me? I've had 3 people die from cigarette-related deaths and her mom just got done beating throat/lung cancer.\n\nI told her I don't want to date a smoker because it's a very personal thing to me. She says I'm being unreasonable.", "summary": "Am I being unreasonable for wanting someone to not smoke in order to be in a relationship with me? Especially since I've had people die from cigarettes and her mom had cancer? Side note- I also have asthma."}
{"id": "t3_4n207y", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "\"lost\" pet", "post": "So my daughter turned 8 a few months ago and her whole life she has been accompanied by her cat. Her cat would sleep with her, follow her around, sit on her lap, and put up with pretty much anything she did to it.  \n  \nHere is the hard part. My daughter had a hard time closing doors when she is in a rush to go out and my wife or I will shut the door after she doesn't get it all the way shut. Three weeks ago neither of us were in the room when she went out and the door was open for long enough for her cat to get out.  \n  \nHer cat did not come back. We made lost fliers and posted them around the neighborhood and contacted the local shelters in case someone picked her up. We got a ton of calls but none of them were her cat.  \n  \nLast week we got a call from the local shelter and they said we should come take a look at this cat because it matched the pictures and age. My daughter was still at daycare and the wife and I were both working from home. We drove up and saw the cat in question and it was ours. She had been mauled, infected with FIV, and couldn't stand up on her own. The vet bill would have been outrageous and we have another cat at home who does not have FIV so we made the call to have her put down.  \n  \nEvery day since the cat ran away my daughter has asked about her and since the day at the shelter my wife has to leave the room and cry every time she asks or says she hopes she found a good home. so finally, the question: should I tell my daughter that her cat won't be coming back? I have discussed it with my wife and we are in agreement that we have to do something about her asking every day but we don't know if she is ready to deal with the death of a pet.", "summary": "8 year old daughters pet ran away, the cat was found but was injured and sick and had to be put down. Wife cries every time daughter asks about the cat. What should we tell our daughter?"}
{"id": "t3_10rvhi", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How soon is too soon?", "post": "I'm going to start by saying I've (25f) been out of the dating game for about 3 years. That LTR ended in June and I've had numerous \"dates\" with guys who turn out to be creeps or just not what they advertise.  \n  \nFast forward go a few weeks ago. I met a man (26m) online a few weeks ago and we have just started seeing each other face to face. He is everything he seemed to be. Our first day was Thursday night and we have gone out every night since. He fits the bill of what I'm looking for and he has told me I fit his. He asked me to be his exclusive girlfriend Saturday night on our third date, and I gleefully agreed.  \n  \nWe made out Saturday and Sunday nights and it's been great but I'm really trying to practice restraint. He has already said he's in no rush and is not pressuring me at all. In fact, we both have been very artful and skilled in letting up during our kissing when we notice the other getting too hot/heavy.  \n  \nI've never been one to make out this quickly let alone have sex so soon, but fireworks are flying. In my gut, I feel like he could be a long term keeper and he has already expressed the same. He's ready to show me off to his family. So I don't want to do anything too quickly and possibly ruin our relationship's chances at going the distance.   \n  \nBasically, an opportunity is coming up this weekend. Its technically past the one week mark of us seeing each other face- to-face rather than just phone/text/email. We are connecting on every level and conversation flows freely. I feel the relationship so far is more than physical. I feel mentally, physically and emotionally ready if he is also.", "summary": "I want to know how long one should wait before sex to still have him see me as LTR/serious material.   "}
{"id": "t3_xo7rj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Weird love triangle", "post": "Me a female 21yr and my cousin female 23yr have been best friends for  a long time (were neighbors too). My cousin has always been wilder than me and although I do love her she is much more manipulative and she dates many guys. \nA few months back I met one of her guy friends and we hit it off, I have never felt that connection with someone. She immediately prohibited me from seeing him because he was ' hers\". Anyways we went back to my place, my cousin got drunk and danced that night, I stayed up talking with him and he told me he liked me because I was sweet. We started talking after that and eventually started seriously dating. I started to really fall for him and we spent almost everyday together. We never had sex because I wanted to wait.\nAll behind my cousins back. \nI know its is wrong what I did and take full responsibility on what happens after.\nWell first ( at around 8 months) he turned out to be a total different person than I had once believed. He eventually was totally different and started growing extremely distant.\nI became very attached and it really hurt me.So we broke up.\nBut, now is when things get weird. He began speaking to my cousin once more, and I thought it was very harmless because she is not his type.\nWe all decided to go out on Thursday ( his best friend 23yr Male, him, my cousin and I) although I knew this was a bad situation I was getting myself into. He ended up being with her the whole night. I drank too much and of course that didn't end well. I kissed his best friend, fell on my ***, I told him he was a terrible person and even cried a bit? ( Which is really out of my character)\n\nNow him and my cousin are going out more often. \nWhile I, have to sit back and say nothing. \nIt is really hard to see them together and I do not know what to do?\nI know I should have not lied in the first place and I wonder why he is doing this? \nWhat is the best thing I can do?\nShut up and deal with it?", "summary": "Dated a guy behind my best friends back because she said he was off limits. Soon after we breakup he starts seeing her, all while I have to sit back and say nothing."}
{"id": "t3_3krvd1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it ok for the person I'm seeing [38/F] to not respect my [35/M] feelings while she has a very sick pet (cat)?", "post": "We haven't been seeing each other that long so I'm wondering if this is a serious red flag. She sprung the sick pet news on me in guilt trip fashion and used it as justification for being upset with me over the phone. So I took my time to calmly explain how what she was doing made me feel. There was a long pause. Then she took the conversation in a new direction without acknowledging what I said. After a sentence or two I interrupted her to ask if she was really going to ignore what I just said, which was what I thought to be a pretty mature attempt to resolve a problem I was having with her. Her response to me asking if she was going to just gloss over my statement? \"That's right. Because-\" *Click* That's when I hung up. She sent a few texts after that saying how she thinks she's walking on eggshells and that she feels she has to prove she's good. Those texts really surprised me because I don't know how she can say those things. In fact, that's exactly how I feel.\n\nRight after those two texts she sent another one saying that she just found out her cat is blind in the last 24 hours. Like, what?! Why didn't you say something a day ago? Why are you just now saying this during a conflict that it has nothing to do with?\n\nHere is another example of how I feel like she doesn't respect my feelings:\n\nThe other night she said I'm funny when I'm not trying to be but am not funny when I am trying to be. Kinda hurtful, right? So I said so. Her response was that at least she was laughing and that was a good thing. I let it go after a small fuss because I'm really trying to be mature and not pick fights but it really hurt.\n\nIt feels like she's playing dirty, inconsiderate pool. Am I being too high maintenance? Is it all in my head? I'm looking forward to any thoughts or suggestions anyone has.\n\nIn trying to keep this short I hope I didn't leave out too many details to where I didn't provide enough information.", "summary": "Woman I just started seeing doesn't seem to respect my feelings. Should I just cut bait or have I not made enough of an effort?"}
{"id": "t3_l5tl8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my birthday is tomorrow and I need help with Facebook!", "post": "Hi reddit, here is my dilema. my birthday is coming up in 2 weeks time and I always have thought it tacky to have the entire wall filled with \"Happy Birthday!\" written 5000 times by different people. It's tacky, pointless, and so insincere. I'd prefer not to have my entire wall besieged.\n\nSo I had an idea, what if I could get rid of the ability to post to my wall, but instead allow people to comment instead. That way, i can have people comment on a status I write instead of on my actual wall. I was wondering if Reddit can help me with this.", "summary": "Is there any way to deactivate my friends from posting to my wall while still activating the ability to comment on posts?"}
{"id": "t3_w79c0", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "My dogs have learned to unlock the padlock and open the front door and escape!", "post": "I have 5 dogs, 2 of which are large rescue pit-bulls which have both learned to let themselves in and out the back door. (Our other dogs are too small to attempt this. \nJust about 2 weeks ago they got this idea that if they could open the back door... the bedroom and the bathroom door they could open the front door as well. In the 3 years we have had one of them she has never attempted this, we've had the other for a year. Simple solution... turn the padlock on the door and they wont escape...... no, of course it cant be that easy. One of them (not sure which) has learned to UNLOCK the pad lock (its a twist lock) OPEN THE DOOR... and escape.\nThis is the pad lock now... \n\nThis is the trap we have\nThey are terrified of the water bottle \n\nCulprits \n\nBesides changing the door knob on the front door... an taping it shut is there any sort of child proof lock that would go on this sort of knob? I have only been able to find ones for circular knobs....\nHas anyone else had this problem before? I feel like since we have never really pay much attention to them letting themselves out the back door they don't think they are doing anything wrong.", "summary": "Dogs are escape artists and unlock the padlock and can open the door and let themselves out the door, looking for a child lock for this door knob."}
{"id": "t3_49ra6u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21] have a girlfriend [22] but have had a crush on another Girl [19] for a month", "post": "So I'm in a semi long distance relationship i go to school 6 hours away from where my Girlfriend lives. We've been dating ever since the spring semester started so roughly 2 months. I really like my girlfriend we have so many thing in common and a few differences i actually like. I've only gone back to visit and hang out with her once and saw her 3 days out of the 5 I was there. We went on a really nice date and was happy. \n\nNow there is this girl I met here on campus while playing soccer with some other people  (2 weeks before i visited my girlfriend) who i talked to once and started to develop a crush on immediately, and i told myself it would go away. I would see her around campus but only greet until one day we had small talk. When i went back home to visit i thought that crush was long gone because like i said of how happy i was with my gf. \n\nI came back to school and saw her in the hallways and just greeted her. That instant the feeling of having a crush came back. I actually saw her earlier today and we had a nice conversation and asked her when they were playing soccer again and she asked for my number. I gave it to her. \n\nLittle note, my current gf is a type i usually dont go for and i didnt immediately have a crush on her (like the girl from school) i just started to like her becauee of how cool she and how fast we connected and clicked. The girl i have a crush on is my type and is also a very nice girl.\n\nMy predicament is that I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT TO DO. Spring break is this coming week so I am going back home.", "summary": "I have a girlfriend back home and have been crushing on this girl for a month, need advice or experiences that could help me out on what to do."}
{"id": "t3_262jrc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How to Pass my Geometry Final", "post": "Hey guy's I'm in a continuation school because I'm far behind on high school credits due to poor choices. Anyhow I have a final that will be the determining factor on if I pass the class or not, so this is really important to me. I asked the teacher for a study guide or some practice questions and she flat out refuses to give me anything to go off of. In the past when asking her for help she always directs me to another teacher instead of helping me herself. What can I do online that will help me study a general understanding of geometry and let me know what I know and what I need to work on for tomorrow's final?", "summary": "my teacher is a lazy bad teacher who is sucking tax money and won't assist me in preparing for a geometry final, help!"}
{"id": "t3_krdka", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Dear NYC police: Hippies protesting on Wall Street isn't news. Hippies getting pepper sprayed in the face is BIG news. If you hadn't sprayed them, we never would have noticed them.", "post": "I assume that there won't be a huge number of NYC police officers on reddit - and if there are, they're probably a little busy right now. I just hope someone on a police force reads this and the idea disseminates to some modest extent. \n\nLet me just say that I think what happened was terrible, but forgetting all the moral arguments and the violation of civil liberties, it seems short sighted for cops to act like that. Honestly, in a city on a weekend there's probably like 5 protests a day - the only ones that get attention are the ones that end in mob violence or police brutality.", "summary": "if I were a police officer and I hated a group of protestors, I would make sure the protest went as smoothly as possible. Tell your friends."}
{"id": "t3_herz8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "to those that have cheated or are currently cheating on your SO...", "post": "what emotions did you experience during or after the event?\n\ni was hanging out and reconnecting with some friends after a short deployment while my gf of two years was living abroad. my best friend was trying to mack on a girl and would force me to go along with him whenever they'd be at the same social gathering. well, one night we're all at a mutual friends house cooking and drinking and generally having a good time. i get way too drunk and instead of leaving when my buddy wanted i convince him that we should go back into the house. i'm basically asleep on the couch in the living room when the girl my buddy likes comes up and starts grinding on me. eventually we go upstairs and have sex. my buddy leaves in disgust while another guy that was supposed to be one of my oldest friends basically sends my gf live updates via email. afterwards my best friend cuts me from his life as does my gf. \n\nwhen i woke up the morning after i just sat there wishing as hard as i could that the night before was a part of some awful dream. i felt sick to my stomach about what i did - that somehow i'm not the guy i thought i was, that i completely disrespected my best friend and my gf. i was deeply saddened that i had hurt and embarrassed two people i cared about so much. it's easily the one thing in my life i wish i could take a mulligan on. it's been a year and i'm starting to feel like not such a jackass about it but i fear the possibility of running into my ex this friday will bring up some of those old emotions.", "summary": "boy cheats on girlfriend. the other girl was someone his best friend was crushing on. girlfriend and best friend dump the cheater. guy felt awful about the whole thing and is just starting to feel better after a year."}
{"id": "t3_3d9kmq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] and my confusion at my crush [21 F] 1 month, the only reason I get up", "post": "Be sure to explain in detail with line breaks.\nCurrently I have been having a super fanatical crush on a girl in my neighbourhood who Is the kindest person I know (plus she's pretty fucking hot). Although, I don't understand what she thinks about having a relationship with me, hell I don't even know if it would be healthy for me.\n\nAnyway, I've only been a pretty introverted person with not many friends but those who are, are true friends. Furhtermore, i am not egotistical but I would describe myself as relatively handsome with nice eyes so I am sure I would look good enough for her.\n\nAdditionally, It was one month ago when I was on top of my roof about to try and kill myself because I can't be bothered with life tbh, when I saw my crush walking down the street with some serious sexiness then looked at me and smiled REALLY sincerely (not that she knew what I was doing). It was then that I knew I wanted to be with her no matter what shit I had to put up with.\n\nShe always gives me these quick glances and smiles that really perk me up but I have one problem...\n\nMy friend is also interested with her but not mainly (he said he would but would rather someone out of his league) and that makes it into this fucked up love triangle. Anyway, it seems as if when in a group she is more intimate with me but by herself doesn't really want to be around me much and would 100% of the time rush towards him and be so friendly (jealousy is a bitch).\n\nis this because she is nervous? is she genuinely not interested in me? Is it wrong for me to be this obsessed?", "summary": "if someone does not want to be alone with me and be friendly but will in a group do they not like me?"}
{"id": "t3_4mqtx5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [22 M] gay and I love my straight best friend [22 M]; don't want to overstep bounds", "post": "I've been friends with Ryan for about 4 years now.  We hang out a lot, and I've lived with him as a roommate too.  About half a year into getting to know him, I started to love him; since then I've shifted my mindset to think of him as just a best friend.  He knows that I'm gay and that I like him, and he's said before that he was okay with it.\n\nFor context, I grew up in a conservative/religious family, so they aren't exactly very accepting (in fact, they've very clearly stated the opposite...)  They don't know I'm gay, and I don't plan on telling them anytime soon.  Anyways, the point is that some of that rubbed off on me over the years and well...\n\nI get really paranoid about overstepping my boundaries and coming onto him.  Like, sometimes my hand will brush against his while we're walking and for the next 10 minutes I'm arguing back and forth in my head with alarms going off.  I'm pretty sure I'm way overthinking this, but I just wanted the straight guy's perspective: **what would you consider too much**?  I'm just really trying to find the correct line here and it's hard for me to imagine it from the other side.", "summary": "I'm gay, getting over being in love with my straight best friend; super paranoid about if I overstep boundaries, want straight guys' opinions on what's okay."}
{"id": "t3_3vzcrc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28F] not uncomfortable with traveling to places my husband [30 M] 1yr took his ex to", "post": "Yesterday he came back home and talked to me about places he's been to, I had a feeling that a place he mentioned was somewhere he took his ex of 5yrs (they lived together and he wanted to marry her), so I asked and he was like yea he was there with her. I felt very uncomfortable immediately and I felt chills on my body from being upset. It is immature I know but I can't help it. I felt like he must have been to a lot of those places with her because he's the kind of guy who would take his girl on vacations and they were in love for 5yrs etc I just felt like I can't compare to that. I didn't ask him to list all the places they went to but I feel like I suspect everytime he mentions some nice place he's been to and wonder if he's taking me somewhere they went to and the idea would make me sick. I know it's very immature of me to think that way and it's unfair to him so I didn't say anything, I didn't know what to say without showing him I'm sensitive and emotional so I was just quiet and didn't say much. But it's been boiling in me since then. \nHow should I approach this issue without sounding unreasonable?", "summary": "insecure about husband's ex of 5yrs and uncomfortable about going to all the places they went to and afraid to ask him to list all the places they went to."}
{"id": "t3_17ze0e", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My Gf of 2 years just told me she cheated on me...7months ago.", "post": "I need some advice, I've never been cheated on and this is my first serious relationship. A little background, my gf is going through depression, but getting help for it. She hasn't cut in awhile and just started again. I caught her with scars today and she is going to see a therapist tomorrow. Tonight she came to some terms with herself and says she is finally ready to stop lying to herself. She tells me that a friend of mine, that I haven't seen in months had sex with her. They were both lucid and have no excuse for their actions (I talked to them both). I generally have a zero tolerance policy for this sort of thing, but she says the only reason she didn't tell me sooner was because she was afraid I would leave her. I felt too sick to think and too shocked to react. I almost don't want to leave her because we have an amazing relationship with each other. We connect on so many levels and share interests and attractions with one another. She cares about me a lot and that cannot go unmissed. She loves me very much and I know this for a fact, I just don't know how I can work past this.", "summary": "My gf cheated on me with an old friend of mine and finally chose to tell me. We have a great connection and I don't want to give her up, but is it the right decision?"}
{"id": "t3_4jco0f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [14f] sister [16f] says she's cutting contact after she leaves for college.", "post": "Me and my sister do not have the best relationship. She ignores me, belittles my accomplishments, insults me and we fight constantly. However, there are moments when we act like sisters, and get along. \n\nShe's already said she's cutting contact with my father due to his emotionally abusive ways towards her and my mother. (Started around 2009 after his stroke.) She's also stated that after college, she's moving to Australia with her boyfriend.\n\nAfter a fight went too far with her, she said she said she's not going to talk to me/ contact me after she leaves for college. I really want us to keep in touch because no matter what, she's my sister and I love her.", "summary": "My sister says she will cut contact with me after she leaves for college, and plans to live in Australia after college."}
{"id": "t3_48q17r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When/How should I [30M] tell an ex [29F] who I am on good terms with that I'm seeing someone else. Difficulty: it's been a while and getting sort of serious.", "post": "I dated a woman for three years who was amazing and, in retrospect, I did not deserve. We had a great time and she saw me through some pretty serious personal shit, but I didn't handle my setbacks well. I drank too much and let myself become chronically under-employed while she excelled at her job and saw the writing on the wall. She dumped me and it hurt. It hurt because I knew it was my actions that lead to me sleeping in motels and couch surfing.\n\nBut, I did manage to turn it around after about a year. I screwed my head back on straight as it would go and locked down a new job in a state far, far away. And it's been great. I like my work again, I've made friends and I've met a woman who I really really like.  A woman who I like enough that we've met each other's families and plan trips months in advance. Bully for me. However...\n\nMy ex and I managed to stay on speaking and eventually friendly terms.  We still text each other jokes from time to time and it's nice for to hear that she's doing well. And I really mean that. I truly value her as a friend. But the elephant in the room is our failed and pretty serious relationship. I mean how do you say \"Oh, and by the way, I know I said I love you for three years but now I'm seriously into someone else\"?\n\nI guess I'm not asking for a way to bring this up without pissing her off so much as I'm asking for the most tactful way to let this information slip.", "summary": "Was a terrible boyfriend and got dumped. We became good friends again and I met someone else. It's gotten serious enough that not mentioning her seems like lying by omission. How do I disclose a new relationship tactfully to an ex?"}
{"id": "t3_1w5gtp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] going to ask [23 F] I've known for 2 months on a date next week on Friday. Here is my plan.", "post": "So I took up a ballroom dancing class that meets every week and I met this girl that has a beautiful dance - for the longest time I thought ~~she was an instructor since she knows the dances so well!~~", "summary": "I like this girl in a dance class I see every week. I plan to ask her out. Suggestions / remarks/ experience stories would be helpful :) "}
{"id": "t3_1iva4i", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (f) have trust issues.. Began trusting (m) & I don't want to get hurt.", "post": "*So I wasn't sure where to post this, but after a little thought I decided perhaps r/relationship_advice would be the best place to ask.\nAs it's mainly involves a relationship.*\n\n----\n\nI have trust issues, I have had them for a long time.\nI learn't when I was young, that I will only ever have myself, that no matter what one day I will be all alone. \nI selfishly cannot bear the idea of trusting someone & getting hurt in the process.\n\nI accepted this & have done so for years.\nYet recently I had met someone, we became \"close long distance friends\". \nEach and everyday he would bring a smile to my face, and brighten my \"not-so brilliant\" day, by just talking to me about all sorts of things. We didn't go without talking to each other more than 12 hours, each and every day we would talk.\n\nToday is the first day I went without talking to him.\nI did miss his thoughts & opinions.. but hey, we both have different life's to live. \nDue to this.. Today I realised, that I am always looking forward to each time he talks to me. I was beginning to \"trust\" that he will be there for me in the present, and talk to me. \nAnd I feel that it's selfish that I even began to feel emotions such as these..\nSo I realised that I cannot/shouldn't rely on him to always be there.", "summary": "OP has trust issues, began to trust a guy, cannot bear the idea of trusting anyone, does know what to do. "}
{"id": "t3_15j3pi", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "3yr old Australian Shepherd gets aggressive when cell phone rings.", "post": "I am coming to reddit because so far I haven't been able to find a legit animal behavioralist in my area. (I understand reddit is no substitute for that.)\n\nA little background. . . I have a 3 year old Australian Shepherd. He is very well behaved for the most part. He listens to all basic commands and makes good eye contact most of the time. He is quite defensive of the yard and property. If someone comes to the door or a loud car drives by he barks and growls. He quickly quiets down when you ask him to. (Most of the time except when he is in the yard alone) He gets along very well with other dogs and people. If someone new is coming to the house he is standoffish at first but quickly is very friendly. (As long as I say its ok) He is well excercised for the most part. (Walk to a field and then 45 minutes+ of running/fetch/frisbee) In the winter time he goes outside less but doesn't seem to act any differently. I do alot of indoor training/play with him as well.\n\nThe other day my friends phone rang and he stood up about to answered it. At the same time my dog started growling and attacked him. He stopped after a few seconds (gave him sit commands etc) but was still very heated. My friend went in the other room for his phone call and it seemed like my dog wanted to follow him. We both thought the ringtone agitated him.\n\nAre there any clear cut training methods to stop this behavior? It happened twice now with two different people. He is completely fine with the person before and shortly after it happens. It really comes out of nowhere. I have tried to replicate the scenario but haven't been able to. I have also shown him a ringing phone etc.\n\nAlso if anyone has tips about making him less defensive of the yard it would be great! Sometimes he barks at people that are 4+ houses away. Once he bolted out the door and barked and circled the mailman. I have watched a bunch of youtube videos and done alot of googling but haven't found anything that worked yet.I get that this particular breed is quite defensive.", "summary": "Dog attacked when friends cell phone rang and friend went to answer. How to train him out of this behavior? Any tips to make him less defensive of the yard?"}
{"id": "t3_2y878x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [18F] of a year and a half broke up yesterday and it was for the best, yet I feel absolutely horrible now. Did I do the right thing?", "post": "Yesterday I broke up with my girlfriend of almost a year and half, due to myself falling out of love, which resulted in me not treating her the way she deserves to be treated. I did what I thought was best and told her about this as we promised to always be honest about our feelings, and predictably the conversation ended poorly.\n\nI had been feeling in such a way for a long time, and I tried waiting to see if the feelings would come back, but they didn't.\n\nShe is absolutely broken and I have told her that I still want to remain close (as close as you can be as ex's) and that I didn't want to disappear from her life, nor her from mine. \n\nI feel the worst I have in my life for this happening, and even though our relationship isn't what it once was, I still care for her wellbeing immensely.", "summary": "Broke up for the best with my gf and it destroyed her. I thought I did the right thing but now I feel like shit. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2ix87c", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "[RANT] I don't even want this party any more", "post": "I am so freaking sick and tired of repeatedly telling my mother my opinion (when she explicitly asks for it) about the engagement party.  I decided that I do not want to be the center of attention and would like a couples shower instead of a bridal shower.  Only I phrased it as an engagement party initially.  Now my mother will not listen to anything I tell her after she asks (i.e. she asked if I would like a specific brisket recipe and I said I would prefer my fiancee's family recipe.  She won't let us have his family's recipe).  This compounded with me asking for informal Facebook invitations to a cake and punch (what I originally requested to save mom & dad money) party and them telling me that is not what Brides' (fucking) magazine said to do, I am more stressed out about a fucking engagement party than I am about the actual wedding.  I don't even want the party any more.  Heck, she expected me to hash out a guest list for the party and the wedding WHILE AT WORK. (I go to classes full time and work part time in a position that would easily be full time thus creating more stress)\n\nOn top of all of that is the attire issue.  Mother has purchased two and almost purchased two more dresses.  Only one of the four is in a wedding color not the same as bridesmaids.  I also sent her a picture of a dress I found when just looking to see what was out there.  She refused to comment on it and threw a holy fit over not being there (without asking me if I would show her when she came up in a week).  I ended up buying the dress now because I did not want to deal with it (she would have complained that the underlay is not white).\n\nNow she is saying that because when I invited her up to look at the dress I was not able to go shopping with her that day due to wanting to spend time bonding with bridesmaids, she has been ousted. \n\nI feel that my opinion no longer counts for anything but to decide to do the exact opposite.\n\nWeddit, HELP!!!", "summary": "Mother has no respect for my opinions on my wedding and has gotten it to the point I begged my fiancee to elope tonight.  BTW we've only been engaged 3.5 weeks (5 months to go)"}
{"id": "t3_2pr70x", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[25m] My fiancee [25f] is a sheltered person. We are likely to be living away from home for a while. Looking for advice.", "post": "I'm a medical student. In a year, we will be married. In a few more years, we will move to wherever I end up doing my residency (3-4 years). Though staying in our home state is possible, it's unlikely.\n\nShe tried to live away from home once. It was a terrible experience and she only lasted a few months. So I asked her, \"how do you feel about being away from home for a few years during my residency?\" She says she's scared and not sure if she can take it.\n\nNow i'm scared. Residency, especially first year, is time consuming. I'm not sure what to do or think or say. This was something we discussed earlier in our relationship and she just said \"it's no big deal; I need to grow up anyway\".\n\nYeah =/", "summary": "my woman sucks at being away from home. I will probably be going out of state for residency. What advice do you have for me?"}
{"id": "t3_2d2mgo", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Need help with a girl me 22 and her 20", "post": "I met this girl a couple months ago off tinder. I didn't know anyone in my city so it was nice meeting this girl. We hung out on the weekends because we worked during the week. She wanted to take things slow so we did. Eventually we went on a vacation trip together and things finally happened in bed. Roll forward a month and things are still going well and she says how she looks forward to us returning to college cause we will have a lot of fun together. She says I am a great guy and she really likes me. She had some shitty relationships previously apparently. Then out of no where her demeanor changes completely. She says she no longer wants a relationship and just wants to be friends. All summer I put my time into hanging out with this girl and getting to know her. My coworkers often got mad at me because I chose to hang out with her instead of go drinking with them. She told me that she could eventually want a relationship and I am not someone she wants to throw away but I have no idea what to do now.  I really like her but she is just destroying me emotionally right now. Literally yesterday she was telling me how she can't wait to kiss and hold me then today she is saying she wants to be friends because she can't handle a relationship. Please help me.", "summary": "Met a girl 2 months ago. Things went great for a while then she suddenly did a complete 180 in the matter of hours saying she doesn't want a relationship and only wants to be friends now."}
{"id": "t3_3x33wj", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by using a LPT", "post": "Happened last night, so points for that, I guess:\nI read that post yesterday about discussing your crushes with your SO and working through them. I thought it was a very insightful and being the guy that I am, tried to strengthen the avenues of communication with my girlfriend. I knew it would be a sensitive topic to discuss so my strategy was to bring it up in a nonchalant way. We were getting ready for bed, and we always talk to each other before we go to sleep. I figured it was the perfect time. I tell her about the LPT I read earlier in the day. \"Yeah, that seems like a good tip\" she responded. Then it gets quiet. I can hear the wheels in her head turning. \"Do you have a crush on somebody?\" she asked. I knew by her tone that things were getting serious. \"No, at least not anymore. What about you?\" I asked her. \"NO! Who the hell did you have a crush on?!\", she was pretty much yelling at this point. I knew I had reached a point of no return. \nI had to spill the beans: \"my sister's friend (we'll call her K). It was the first time we met her. It didn't last long- I realized that what you and I have together is way more valuable. She just came along at a time when you were really upset all the time and she was just so happy and i thought she was cute. I worked through it though. I just wanted to be open about it. You really have never had a crush on another person during our entire relationship?!\" She gives me a death stare and looks straight into my eyes and says \"No. Never.\" It gets quiet again and I really don't know what to say. She covers up and turns off the light and says \"I was going to blow you tonight since I haven't in a while, but you might as well get K to do it. I'm sure she'll be happy to do it since I'm such an angry bitch.\" She rolled over and that was it. We woke up this morning and got ready for work and ate breakfast in complete silence.", "summary": "decided to open up to my girlfriend about a crush I had at one point because of something I read on Reddit yesterday, denied a BJ and am now in the doghouse."}
{"id": "t3_2vkfdu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (26F) boyfriend's (26M) mother (63F) made him choose between us. He chose me but I'm scared she'll come back.", "post": "This is such a confusing story, thanks for reading. I've been with my boyfriend for 1.5 years, we are both 26. We dated casually to start but fell in love and both think this is going to last for a long time. We're very happy together.\n\nAround 8 months ago I met his mother. She doesn't live near us, so I have only met her a couple of times, over a short period. I thought we got on well. She loved me, because I am \"rich and pretty\" (her words - I'm not rich, and pretty is subjective). My boyfriend and I went on an expensive vacation that we'd both saved up for. It was amazing. It was then that she started making derogatory comments. Saying that it was a waste of money etc. Then suddenly I was no longer invited to family events. If he would go to visit her, I wasn't welcome. It got worse. To summarize the next couple of months: it got worse until she ended up making him pick between me or her. I have no clue why. Long story short we are happy together and he has cut her off, but it wasn't without a lot of hassle including death threats to us both, and I think my boyfriend is very traumatized by what happened, although he won't talk about it.\n\nSince then we have had no contact apart from she sent him a Christmas card. However. I am SO scared she will come back. I worry that she will manipulate him into leaving me, and do terrible things to us. What can I do to get over this? What can I do to prevent this happening? What do I do if she comes back? Also, what can I do to support my boyfriend? My family has welcomed him but I worry it's not the same.", "summary": "Boyfriend's mom made him choose between me or her, he chose me, I'm scared we haven't seen the last of her."}
{"id": "t3_189c5c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (22/M) am unsure whether I should pursue a relationship with my lovely girlfriend (28/W) due to our age gap", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 years, and I could honestly say that I've never been so happy with someone before. We are getting rather serious, and we both love each other deeply, but I could never stop worrying about her being 6 years older than me...\n\nMy girlfriend was a virgin when we met and I was the first guy she's been in bed with. She also never lived on her own before, and is very dependent on her parents. I, on the other hand, was living on my own at the time, and had a lot more experience with relationships before. Thus, despite the fact that she's 6 years my senior, she's much more immature than I am, and looks at least 8 years younger than her age. I'm much more serious and responsible than her and have had a lot more experiences in my life. As a result, I've always felt like the older, more mature one in the relationship, and I've always seen her as someone who is a couple of years younger than myself.\n\nDespite this, when we are not seeing each other, I can't help but worry about our age difference. How will she mature when she gets older? Will she still be her young vibrant self? Much of my worries stem from my traditional father, who never approved of our relationship since she's older than me. According to him, such relationships are temporary, and I would get bored of being with someone who, down the line, will have less energy than myself. These worries are getting in my head, because we are starting to get really serious, and I am wondering if I should spend the rest of my life with this absolutely gorgeous woman, whom I have a strong connection with, or if I should stop wasting her time and move on...\n\nSo my question is, do any of you have any experience with relationships like this one? Is 6 years even something to worry about? What are the pros and cons of being with an older woman? Do I have to worry about anything as time progresses?", "summary": "I love a woman who is 6 years older than me, but I'm worried that the age gap will lead to this relationship's end."}
{"id": "t3_1rfofm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M17] don't know to make make personal contact with my crush[F17].", "post": "So there's this girl in my new class... We met 3-4 months ago when we got put in the same class at our new school. At first we didn't notice eachother but after about 1-1,5 months we started to talk on a regular basis(almost every schoolday, not on our free time). She laughs at almost every joke I make and I sometimes catch her eye whilst she's looking at me.\n\n A month ago our class had a classparty, and that's when I started to notice that she sort of followed me around. Wherever I went/sat down in the house she would go sit down aswell. She also asked me to remove her necklace and made me wear it, telling me that I looked cute with it on. Our hands met on the table and she held her hand on mine for a good 20 seconds. When it was time for me to leave she followed me outside and sat down on the ground looking at me until I was out of her sight(she was, however, quite drunk that night). \n\nAfter this she has been talking to me less often and I heard her friend talking with her about how another guy was ''very hot'' and that she should ''go'' for him. I don't know if she wanted to make me jealous(maybe?) since I was sitting one row in front of them. This makes me wonder if I've taken too long time to make her realise that I like her.\n\nThe problem is that she is hard to reach out to! She dosn't use facebook(so no chatting) and asking for her number would be quite awkward since she never sits alone in class. I need help with how to make personal contact and show her that I like her more than friends.", "summary": "I like this girl who has shown signs of her liking me. However, I don't know how to make personal contact and think that I might have waited to long to have a chance with her. Any help?"}
{"id": "t3_28fx47", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my girlfriend [17F] of 2 years, going our seperate ways on my birthday.", "post": "So lately my ex girlfriend, still feels hard to call her that, has been somewhat reluctant to kiss me and she says its because she doesnt feel the same and it is partly/mostly to do with the fact that i dont have ANYTHING going for me. I am going to make changes in my life, and would ultimately want to get her back into my life.\n\n I already know, i shouldnt try to hold on to her, but i want to be a better person for myself and i want to learn to love myself. Is there any chance that she can be a part of my life again if we try to be friends while i try to get my shit together? \n\ni am extremely used to her  being my girlfrend, and being around her when i cant be her boyfriend makes me very sad. I dont know what im doing here, or what im asking for. I dont have anyone i can really go to except for her and now i cant even do that. This definitely takes prize for worst birthday ive ever had. Any help is much appreciated.", "summary": "Girlfriend of 2 years tells me i need to work on me. Worst birthday ever. What do i do now? Will i ever get her back?"}
{"id": "t3_38zj6p", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "I [21 M] with my close friend [20 F] 6 years, tells me she likes everything about me but can't get her subconscious to do agree on it?", "post": "Background: L(using as a name for her) and I have been friends since freshman year of highschool. We got really close and displayed feelings for each other later that year and became a couple. That whole relationship was just sexual and nothing else from that(lasted for 4 months). We were both at fault on it and agreed we should break up. We didn't really talk to each other a lot until our freshman year of college(randomly saying hi and just being friendly between those years).\n\nPresent: We have been hanging out a lot and texting and getting really close in our friendship for the last 8 months when she tells me she likes every aspect about me(physical, sexual, chemistry and mentally) but she can't get her subconscious to agree on it(she also has a boyfriend too). She says she can't see her self being romantic with me, only just as her best friend. She sees herself being happy and having a great time with me. She has told friends and family she really likes me and wants to be with me but she just can't get over that barrier.\n\nIs there anything I can do to help her over that barrier or will she have to?", "summary": "Girl I have known for a long time tells me she likes every aspect about me(physical, sexual, chemistry and mentally) but she can't get her subconscious to agree on it. Is there anything I can do about it?"}
{"id": "t3_54heko", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend (20F) is sending nudes and trying to get with my friend(37F), after just getting back with her boyfriend (20M), should I say something?", "post": "The title says it all. My friend just got back together with her boyfriend/fiance or whatever after 8 months apart. During that time she really went to town on the whole bi-sexual/lesbian thing and almost exclusively identified herself as a lesbian during this time. She had a threesome with my friend and her husband and they remained close.\n\nHowever, after she got back with her ex, she's still been sending nudes to my other friend and attempting to encourage double dates where they'd \"sneak off to the bathroom for 10-15 minutes\". My friend is flattered but hesitant. It's possible that her bf is aware of this and is cool with them being poly, but she's never mentioned poly and I know that infidelity was an issue with the dude previously.\n\nI've never met the guy, but I just get the feeling that if it was my SO, I'd want to know. But is it sticking my nose in shit that it doesn't need to be stuck in?", "summary": "Friend is sending other friend nudes, and trying to set up some sketchy stuff, should I tell her boyfriend?"}
{"id": "t3_4ffy3z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my gf [21 F] of 6 months, I want her to lose weight.", "post": "She was a healthy weight at the start of college but she's gained at least 50 to 60 pounds since the beginning of college. She's also pre-diabetic. She has a family history of diabetes as well. She hates exercise. \n\nI mainly want her to lose weight not because of how she looks but because of her health. Hell yea, I'd love it if she was thinner, but it's not the looks that bother me; she's an awesome girlfriend regardless. I mean it. Yeah I got some flak from my best friends in the beginning but I told them to can it and I don't have any issues with her weight except in one way (below). \n\nShe wanted to enter a long-term, long-distance relationship with me, and I did too. However, I was thinking I'd rather not deal with any avoidable health problems of hers down the road. I don't want her to call me one day and be like \"Yeah, I'm diabetic, and I'm going to have to take insulin every day for the rest of my life and eat this and not that and you have to watch out for signs of hyperglycemia in me, etc.\" I'd much rather not deal with that along with the emotional fallout. Yeah, I do realize we're both only 21 and this is unlikely to be the last relationship for either of us. Still, that's not something I need on my mental in the possibility \n\nLet me be clear - I'd rather not deal with any avoidable health problems on her side. If she was in a car accident or something, then hell yeah, I would go drive whatever distance to see her. I actually had a seizure the other week for the first time (right out of the blue; no family history) and she drove 200+ miles to see me. I'd do the same for her. But I'd rather not have to deal with preventable stuff like diabetes and heart problems from not watching her own weight. She already deals with pretty bad heartburn and back pain. I biked to the store to get her Tums and give her regular massages because I care. Fortunately, heartburn and back pain are relatively minor issues. Am I selfish or what?", "summary": "I love my girlfriend but she's overweight. I don't care about her looks. I am just worried about her health and I don't want to have to deal with avoidable health problems down the road. Am I selfish?"}
{"id": "t3_2sy8pz", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[FL] Light in Front Window", "post": "Hello everyone, \n\n**Background:** \nI live in a one story apartment complex. My front window faces the parking lot. Over the past years my cars have been burglarized. So I decided to get a surveillance camera and put it in my window looking out. At night it's very dark outside and I've had to block the IR lights on the camera because it reflects to itself in the pictures. I also fashioned a light bulb enclosed in a housing that sits flush against the window. It does not damage or modify the window in any way. The blinds keep it pressed against the window. The camera also has black poster board behind it so that when the lights are on inside the is no reflection. It's not the best look, but it works and keeps me from damaging the landlord's stuff.\n\n**Fast forward:**\nI get a letter in the mail from the complex stating that there was an inspection and to please remove the light and all non white backing. No action or consequences were defined in the letter.\n\nI checked my lease and there are no mention of lights, regulations of anything regarding displays. There is a community rules guide that mentions pool times, attire at the pool, quite hours, and guests getting hurt. However, no mention of windows. This is not an HOA and all the rules I have copies don't have mention of these topics.\n\nI get a voicemail later stating that if I don't take it down they will have to issue another kind of notice. Vaguely meaning I guess eviction or fine, idk.", "summary": "Have security camera and light inside my window facing out. Apartments tell me to remove it. There are no rules or regulations in the lease or rules that say I can't have it. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_14qx57", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How can I see her again?", "post": "So I don't think I've seen a question like this yet (or the Reddit search is just crap), so here goes.\n\nLast month, we had to hire a new bartender at our restaurant, and I was in charge of training her. In the first night of training, I found out she was engaged. A swing and a miss!\u00a0\n\nThe next day of training, her fianc\u00e9 came in to the bar area to get some food and to see how she was doing. He had mentioned that her friend was running late, and wanted to come check out her new place of work. After making some small talk with the fianc\u00e9, in walks in the friend. She's cute as hell. I let the new girl talk to her friend a bit, and she introduces me.\u00a0\n\nI wish I could meet more girls when I'm at work. I'm in \"my element\" (I've been there the longest, and am practically managing the bar), I'm confident, and I'm typically happy. I feel like I left a good impression, too. I initiated contact (I told her I didn't catch her name, because I was busy, and shook her hand and \"greeted\" her), I made her laugh, I suggested sushi to order (which she liked), I taught her how to use chop sticks (she said many have tried to, and she finally got the hang of it when I showed her. + a little more contact!), and helped her with a problem she was having at the moment (how to hook up a Nintendo through a VCR (text message)).\u00a0\n\nOverall, I think I did well.\n\nProblem is, how do I see her again? I've told the new girl that I thought she was very cute, which she responded with a slightly excited \"She's single!\" (which I guessed kind of strangely when she was talking about her new kitten to the new girl.)\u00a0\n\nSo, with my only channel of my coworker, how can I see her again to possibly ask her on a date without it being strange?", "summary": "Cutie-pie friend of coworker enters restaurant. OP thinks he did well. How does OP see her again without weird feelings between coworker or cutie-pie friend?"}
{"id": "t3_t9ffk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend said she doesn't want to be exclusive, but begins treating me exclusively. Wat do?", "post": "Alright, so, **I've known this girl for about 3 and 1/2 years.** **I'm 21, she's 20,** both at the same college that we commute to, and live about 15 minutes away from each other. We went on dates on and off casually over time, and then **recently we made it official.** We are very natural together and are very easygoing with each other as a part of that. A couple weeks ago we had \"the talk\" and she said **she didn't want to be exclusive with me.** I said I was fine with that and she seemed pleased. Over the next few weeks though, **she began treating me more and more exclusively**, intentionally calling me her boyfriend, her other half, etc. We compliment each other very well, she enjoys my family, we have similar life goals, etc. \n\nShe has plenty of other guy friends and I respect her and have no problem with that, I'm not overbearing or trying to control with whom she can or can't spend time. (She's not one to be pressured into things.) We've spent time together with her and her other friends and **I've had time to witness how she interacts with these other guy friends, definitely not the same way she treats me.**\n\nThen, **last Saturday things got a bit steamy,** if you know what I mean, and we ended up sharing our first kiss. After this, however, we had a dead time (just small communication), and didn't spend time together until today (A week later). It went alright and she assured me that things were still great between us, she just needed a little time after so many emotions. She held me close and looked me straight in the eyes as she told me this, as well as gave me a reassuring squeeze. (This is the kind of assurance I'm talking about.)", "summary": "get in relationship with girl, she asks not to be exclusive, but treats me exclusively most of the time. Not sure what to do!"}
{"id": "t3_3yl0t9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] finally decided to tell my father [42m] how he has made me feel for my entire life. Did I go to far?", "post": "Okay so a little background, my father has been addicted to pills about 80% of my life. He has violent out bursts and he constantly degrades everyone around him. He has NEVER gotten a job and my mother has had to take care of my brother, my dad, and me with her night shift job at a hospital and she is just barely making it. \n\nBasically we got into an arguement over me being depressed. I have been for years and he believes that its the music I listen to and that I don't know what im talking about. The usual.\n\nMy mom has always hid my depression from him because when he sees or hears that I have been upset he gets mad at me and yells at me as if I've done something horribly wrong. \n\nHe has never been proud of me, never wants to talk to me about anything pertaining to my life and he only cares about himself.\n\nAnyways I sent him this text message today after he threatened to get mean and nasty with me if I didn't apologise for telling him to get out while he was yelling I at me for crying.\n\n\"I mean its not like I'm used to being treated any different than nasty by you. Im always an idiot who doesn't know anything who isn't allowed to like anything you dont. Plus for some disgusting reason you pretend like my mental problems are nothing to be worried about. And mom never wants me to tell you about it because for some reason you get mad at me for being depressed. I can't remember the last time you were ever proud of my accomplishments.  The only thing I remember is you being disappointed in me on my graduation day and making me cry. My whole life has never been good enough for you or for anyone. Maybe thats why im depressed and completely fucked up in the head. Maybe its because I feel like not a single member of my family who is supposed to love me is proud of a single thing I've done. I must be worthless to everyone. But go ahead and tell me I'm wrong like you always do. I'll just sit over here and cry like I have been for years now. \"\n\nDid I go to far?", "summary": "finally told my asshole father how I felt about him. Did I go to far? Or did I need to do this?"}
{"id": "t3_16d3p8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30M] need to help my girlfriend[29F] cope with my daughter's mother (my ex [30F]).", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been going out for nearly a year now, and have a great relationship: She's very smart, thoughtful, and strong-willed. She makes me happy, I admire her and what she does, and we have a great sex life.\n\nShe seems generally happy with me. However, I have a daughter [3 years] whom she gets along just fine with, but my gf can't seem to cope with my ex. My ex and I were in a 6 year relationship, engaged, had a child, but she cheated on me, as I discovered as I went through her phone. I broke up with her, we never married, daughter now lives with her mom, and one year later, I go on my first date with my now girlfriend.\n\nUnfortunately, my ex will forever be in my life because of my daughter - my gf is always reminded of my terrible ex whenever my ex and I exchange our daughter for visitation, mention my daughter, our whenever she sees a pic of my daughter. My gf questions my judgement as she thinks my ex is the complete opposite of her. In many ways, that's true (with ex, we had a terrible sex life, she had many insecurities, and she often followed her heart more strongly than logic). But my gf keeps bringing her up, and because she views her as trash, makes her question why I choose to be with her.\n\nNot to toot my own horn, but I'm a great guy; I'm very thoughtful, funny to her, extremely good with kids, including my daughter. I get along fine with my ex, and though sometimes thinking about how she cheated gets me angry, I figure it's best for my daughter if we're cordial.\n\nBut my girlfriend just isn't getting over my ex. I don't know how to help her even tolerate my ex. Anyone else ever been in this situation?", "summary": "My girlfriend hates my daughter's mother (my ex who cheated on me), and I need advice on how to help her cope."}
{"id": "t3_1jr0ts", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is one thing you have done in your life that to this day you do not forgive yourself?", "post": "Before I go, one thing.  I used the phrase 'do not' instead of 'can not' in the title because 'do' Implies choice which ultimately we all have.\n\nMost of my friends consider me a very moral and ethical person with good character.  Privately I feel deeply flawed and undeserving.  I've done a lot of bad things one that brings pain to my chest is the betrayal of a friend because I lacked the courage to do the right thing.\n\nI was hired by this person in a large corporation and he quickly became my friend.  He was one of the most brilliant people I have ever met and did not limit his thinking with the impossible.  He pushed me to do things I considered impossible and as a result gave me invaluable insight into my own capabilities.  \n\nUnfortunately he was not adept at playing the political game and after his corporate benefactor left the company he was politically exposed.  I was young and new and his adversaries focused on me.  \n\nInstead of trying to influence him and play a mediation role, I was afraid and tried to gain favor with both sides.  As I saw he was losing the fight, I switched sides, and started treating him differently.  He even called me out on it and I did not have the courage to tell him the truth.\n\nHe finally was fired, and while that outcome was likely inevitable, I had played a role in it to protect my own position.  Quite bluntly, I betrayed him.\n\n3 years later we reconnected and rekindled the friendship.  I still felt horrible and decided when a few of us were getting together the following week I was going to tell him the truth, even at the cost of our friendship.\n\nA day later I got a phone call from another friend who just said \"[name of friend I betrayed] is dead\".\n\nHe had been playing a sport at the age of 30 and dropped dead of a heart attack.  He had a wife and two kids.\n\nMy cowardice and betrayal is something I carry with me to this day and I no longer have the ability to come clean.", "summary": "I betrayed a friend who believed in me, who later died at the age of 30, and I have no way to make it right."}
{"id": "t3_2hfp3k", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by thinking my package looked nice", "post": "Long day at work. Just got home, wanted to take my SO out for some food. Decided I should shower first. Me and SO have only been dating for ~18 months, she just moved in with me about 4 months ago. The way my room is setup, the bathroom is almost a hallway to the closet, which has a large double-wide window in it. She was in the closet pickin out something to wear as I made my way to the shower fully nude. It was at this moment that I realized how glorious my genitalia looked. Like it was hangin perfectly. I couldn't resist. I got my girlfriends attention, and started swing my dick around a circular motion. \"Next time we go to a show and you see a bunch of dudes dancing, this is what's goin on underneath!\" This went on for over a minute, floppin my dick around every which way, laughing til we were tearing up. We were both laughing so hard that we failed to notice the window.. It was dark outside, and the closet light was on, and the blinds were wide open. It's amazing how clearly you can see into someone's house when it's dark out and the lights are on (same thing goes with a car at night with the dome lights on). So mid dick circle, I look past my girlfriend, out the window, and directly into the eyes of my neighbor, who just happened to be taking out the trash. I quickly ducked into the bathroom while my girlfriend laughed hysterically, she said he just shook his head and walked away. We've only lived here a few months, and I haven't met them yet.", "summary": "decided to swing my dick in circles for my SO because of how nice it looked. Neighbor saw me through the window, we made eye contact mid swing. "}
{"id": "t3_2vh5ez", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "GF [19/f] acting strangely?", "post": "I really don't know what's up with her. Last night, round 2 am, I got a text from her asking if I was still awake. I was, so I told her. She asked if she could call me and at the very start of the phone when I asked her what was up she goes \"I really, really miss you\".\n\nWe had a nice conversation and then we went to bed.\n\nToday, she just seems quite off. She had told me she would break up with me if I was late for our Valentine's Date. I asked her if she was serious about it and she said \"I'd be really, really upset\". I told her I wouldn't - and I really won't be because everything's sorted.\n\nShe says she isn't angry... but she just seems really off. Her answers are vague and dull.", "summary": "I really don't know what's going on. At times I'll feel happy because she'll be telling me how much she misses me and loves me. But then other times I feel unhappy because she texts weirdly or whatever."}
{"id": "t3_xqe04", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[29m] Running into the 2 year relationship wall...", "post": "I don't know if that's a \"thing\", but i've experienced it in the past. I'm currently living with my gf (29f) of nearly 2 years, and my mind/eye has been wandering. I guess i'm at the point where all the little things start getting to me, such as different standards of cleaning/cooking, different levels of drive/ambition, imbalance of sex drives. She is very loving, and very sweet, but can be extremely clingy too. \n\nWe do enjoy each others' company, but never really do anything \"quality time\"-wise; different schedules make it difficult, as well as different tastes. In addition to this situation, she wants to move overseas with me in the near future, so there's kind of a point of no (or extremely messy) return looming.\n\nI know that relationships can't always be electric and sparky, and that there is no \"normal\", but is there more than this? Do i man up and try to change how i'm feeling, or do i try to cut things short to save everyone more pain later?", "summary": "gf's idiosyncracies starting to get to me; relationship becoming boring at the 20 month mark; feeling smothered. Opinions?"}
{"id": "t3_1h9fcr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I ask her out fast or wait a little? And a little dating advice, please!", "post": "Hey there,\n\nI (20/M) will be going to a new school soon, and I have met a (20/F) there. We've talked some in the 3 times we met, and I already became cool with her father (I met him in the waiting room, we talked for an hour, we kinda became pals), and I know I've only met seen her 3 times, but I really start to fall for her. Thus should I ask her out fast or should I wait a year orso, to establish a friendship and ask her out then?\n\nThis is my idea of a good first date, I've never been on one, so please help me! :) I don't have a lot of money, so keep it under \u20ac180 like mine, please! \n\n1. Pedicure or Manicure max \u20ac40\n \n2. Hanging out +- \u20ac15,-max.\n3. Make a nice walk with her \u20ac0,-\n4. Starbucks +- \u20ac10\n5. Buy her something nice MAX. \u20ac60,\n6 Dinner max \u20ac40\n\nCosts max \u20ac180,", "summary": "Starting to fall for a girl I've met 3x, became pals with her dad. And asking for help if I should ask her out quickly or wait, plus a date example."}
{"id": "t3_31nhi6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I was the one [M,20] who broke it off with my boyfriend [M,21] of a year. I'm completely heartbroken, and need help with perspective.", "post": "So long story short I dated him for a year. We had so many wonderful wonderful times, the give and take was wonderful, there was unbreakable trust, we could be who we were almost always around each other. He fell in love with me...I didn't.\n\nI love him and everything was perfect on paper, so I stayed thinking that things would fall in to place. A year later, with a few other realizations along the way (We're on two completely different planes regarding our emotional lives and how we see the world, it we don't have a mental connection beyond loving being with one another, etc.) I still wasn't able to fall in love with him. \n\nI realized that I didn't think that he was the one after much denial and self-blame, and three days ago broke up with him. He was blindsided (again, we don't understand each other) and didn't understand my reasons. It was cordial, but both of our hearts are broken. \n\nI'm having a horrible time getting out of bed and going about my daily business. I'm writing this from bed now having skipped my first class, my manager had to help me leave work out the back early last night because I broke down during my break and couldn't stop...\n\nI feel like somewhere in my mind I know it was the right decision, but right now I can't think of anything beyond our good times and how much I miss him and just want to talk, hold, and be with him again.", "summary": "I initiated the break up. I emotionally regret it, but feel like it was for the best. My emotions however are wayyy overcrowding that notion and I can't function. I'm a mess."}
{"id": "t3_hzhhn", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Damage done by a contractor to personal belongings in a condo; refuses to compensate.  Reddit, course of action?", "post": "Thanks for clicking... So I live in a condo in Toronto and rent from the condo owners. About two three weeks ago me neighbors condo flooded and some damage occurred to the flooring and baseboards in my unit.  The day it happened some workers (hired by the condo corporation) came and cleaned up the water, removed some flooring, put on dehumidfyers etc. They needed two weeks for the concrete under the carpet to fully dry before they replaced the base boards so fast forward to then and they also end up painting some of the walls. \n\nI wasn't home during this time but the concierge is supposed to have been there to monitor the work but regardless a painting of mine was damaged. Its not huge, but it is an original and there is now a tear in the canvas. I spoke the with building manager and he saw the damage and said he would see to it that I'm compensated and asked me to email him where I got the painting and how much it's worth. \n\nSo today he calls me and says that the contractor says they didnt do it, the condo Corp isnt responsible, and if I want to pursue it any further to take legal action. \n\nNow the painting is only worth about two hundred dollars so I'm guessing it's not worth it to sue, but the contractor is completely denying the damage. \n\nThe thing is that I'm absolutely sure it was them. It is literally my favorite painting and I definitely would have noticed a tear in the canvas as I see the painting very often being that it sits above my dinner table. \n\nBesides spreading word that the contractor's company will damage your property I'm not sure what else to do. I hesitated to mention them here because I'm not sure if I could be causing libel or whatnot. Basically that was literally my favourite painting and I'm just bent out of shape over it being ruined and them dismissing me with \"sue us.\" I know I can't replace the painting anyway i just sort of want some justice. Do I call and tell them my poor review of their business will cost them at least two hundred?   Thanks in advance for any help.", "summary": "contractors came in to fix water damage, put a hole in a painting, telling me to sue or STFU. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_36ib3h", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [24M] am having jealousy issues with my girlfriend [25F] but have absolutely no reason to be", "post": "So here's the story. I'll to to shorten it as best as I can. Most of my girlfriend's friends (I'd say about 80%) are men. Our relationship is extremely healthy and there are literally no large issues. But when I see that she's texting one of her guy friends, it bothers me. There's no reason it should. She's texting people that she doesn't normally hang out with or see very often, which is totally normal. She's not talking to any ex boyfriends or men I think she's interested in (although they may be interests in her).\n\nThe odd thing is that it bothers me even though what she's doing is totally normal. She's not on her phone all the time. She's rarely on it. I've told her on numerous occasions that I don't care who she texts or hangs out with because she has all of my trust (she really does). But for some strange reason it just bugs me to see guys blow up her phone and call her all the time. She doesn't text or pick up the calls when she's with me. Sometimes she'll wake up with tons of texts and missed calls from all different people. \n\nI've never looked through her phone or snooped or anything. I don't think she's doing anything wrong. \n\nAm I just jealous she's getting a lot of attention from men? She's a very attractive, fit person. But it all boils down to her getting a lot of attention and and it bothering me.  Not keeping me up all night or anything. Just slightly irking me. \n\nThis is probably normal but it's been a while since I've dated someone. Is this normal? Is there a better way to look at the situation? What did you do if this happened to you?", "summary": "Attractive girlfriend gets a lot of attention from guys on her phone. I get jealous but for no reason because I'm 100% certain they're just her friends chit chatting and she's not doing anything wrong."}
{"id": "t3_2jsoxi", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Best advice to give students?", "post": "So I was talking about Napoleon with my students and of course this leads to a talk\\rant about personal budgeting\\etc. I've had a few students talk to me afterwards, them being curious about budgeting and person finance. I saw the post about the cue card and thought... man, I should have a poster or something up in my room as a quick reference or something. But with the cue card there are two issues - 1) they won't know what many of those things are - I do teach some lower stream kids 2) I teach in Canada, so we have different systems and such.", "summary": "Teacher wants to make poster for high school students in Canada to show basics of budgeting and personal finance; what are the primary need to knows\\dos."}
{"id": "t3_4zil9n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] with my girlfriend [20F] of eight months, she met a guy [20s M] through friends a couple weeks ago and they are snapchatting on a daily basis", "post": "A couple of weeks ago my [23M] girlfriend [20F] of eight months met a random guy [20s M] through some of her friends at a bar. I have never met him but they quickly added each other on facebook and are already sending each other snapchats daily.\n\nI haven't confronted her with this yet because I'm afraid she'll find me over jealous or something but I don't think it is appropriate for her to be sending so many pics back and forth with a guy even if they are just friends especially since they've met so recently.\n\nShould I talk to her about this and tell her to go easy on snapchatting this new guy or should I chill since I haven't seen any of those snaps therefore it could be nothing to worry about?", "summary": "My gf of eight months is snapchatting a new guy she just met, daily. Should I tell her I think this is inappropriate or should I chill out since it could be just friendly?"}
{"id": "t3_1jxc4m", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Jealousy is eating me alive.", "post": "Honey, I love it when you hold me close to you and reassure me that you would never cheat on me...again. You did in that first year we were dating, and we took two months to cool things off and try to regain trust. I gave you a second chance. But now, I can't even think about you even talking to another girl. Because I was so unaware of what plans you had in store the first time. Even typing this, I feel like I want to scream and throw things around. \n\nI get sick in my stomach and I don't have female friends...all because I'm afraid of competition. I'll admit it: I'm really insecure. I need male attention to feel good. But feeling like any girl you befriend is going to stab me in the back and take your heart away from me...it's eating me alive. \n\nI can't tell you how many hours I've spent aware planning our next fight. But things don't get better, because you say it's all in my head, that I'm making things up, and seeing them as worse than they are. And way deep down, I know that you love me more than anything. These last three years have been the best of my life - but also very stressful. \n\nBut I want you all to myself. And if my \"crazy\" behavior (isn't that how your best friend put it?) is what it takes to keep you, then damnit - I'll keep it up. \n\nI need you. You're what's left of my family, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.", "summary": "After you cheated on me, I can't take you even talking to other girls. I want you all to myself, and I'm willing to do a lot to make it so."}
{"id": "t3_4uacj5", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "How do I get myself motivated to find the right job?", "post": "I keep turning down those low paying jobs so I'm available to work when a higher paying job comes along, but it's getting to be very frustrating when I have no income right now.\n\nI'm working with a staffing company who gives me one day jobs so I can have at least a little bit of money and hopefully my unemployment is going to go through soon...still that's not enough to get my own place.\n\nI don't like sitting around the house all day just applying for jobs.  I know a couple of people who enjoy sitting at home doing nothing -- I don't know how they do it.  It's only been 3 weeks without a real steady job and I'm going nuts while I know someone who has been without a job for months and is okay with it.  \n\nI feel like I'll be miserable if I take the lower pay opportunity, and then a higher pay job gets back to me once I started the lower pay job.", "summary": "I don't want to go through the hassle of taking a low pay job for now and then quit.  Has anyone just waited it out, or did you take the low pay job while you wait for a higher pay one?"}
{"id": "t3_fzm6i", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Do airline companies have the ability to customize terminals or does the airport control which stores, restaurants, and other types of amenities are found throughout the building?", "post": "My roommates just got into a fight about whether or not airlines are given the right to customize terminals.  \n\nOne person was arguing that since airlines are leasing the spots, they essentially own the terminal and they are allowed to make whatever changes they desire.  For example, they explained that Terminal D in Dallas International Airport (DFW) provided better amenities - such as more stores, better seats, more charging stations, etc. -as a result of the terminal being \"owned\" by American Airlines.\n\nMy other roommate was arguing that those differences in amenities existed only because the airport owners realized that terminals owned by specific airlines might generate more/less traffic than others. While some of the bigger airlines might be housed in terminals with better amenities, they are paying for that right, and were not the ones who provided/created those amenities in the first place.  He was also convinced that most airports (such as DFW) amenities such as number/quality of chairs, amount of charging stations, and availability of televisions is pretty much standard across the entire airport.\n\nI have never really thought about this before, and I have no knowledge on the subject since I typically use the same airports for most of my travels and never pay too much attention.  However, that being said, I have never really noticed a difference in between terminals, especially at DFW, and I am going to have to believe my first roommate is wrong.\n\nI was wondering if there were any Reddit users out there who could shine some light on this argument?  I know this may seem dumb, but after a few drinks, my roommates are not ready to back down until one of them is determined the king.", "summary": "One roommate is convinced that airlines provide specific amenities in specific terminals since they \"own\" their terminals and are in control, while the other believes that those differences are either non-existent or are controlled by airport owners."}
{"id": "t3_1dk84a", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "[19M] My ex girlfriend [F18] wants to be just friends after three years of dating. How do I cope with this?", "post": "She still wants to go to places like the state fair or the zoo alone with me this summer, but she doesn't want to consider it a date. She tells me over and over that she's sorry, but she isn't ready for a relationship right now, and doesn't want to date anyone at the moment.\n\nShe even went as far to say it's possible she's still capable of loving me romantically, but for whatever reason she's turned off from romance right now. Apparently she loves me in a platonic way. Which is a heartbreaking thing to hear.\n\nI asked her if she ever saw us together, and she said \"She cannot see the future\" and honestly doesn't know if we're going to be together again.  She says she's not completely over me.\n\nI'm not sure what to do. This is my first serious relationship, and hearing \"I see you as a friend.\" is the most painful phrase I've ever heard. \n\nCan anyone give me advice? Is this over for good? Do I initiate no contact, or do I stay in her life?", "summary": "Ex girlfriend of three years tells me she sees me as just a friend right now, but in the future it's possible that could change. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_21h4mn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [39F] starting to find my boyfriend [44M] of three months repulsive", "post": "So we've been only dating three months. It's really weird, but I find myself disgusted by him. I'm a little chubby, so what I'm about to say is kind of hypocritical, but he is pretty tall and heavy and sometimes he wears shirts that are too short so his fupa is just sort of out there. When he stands up, his belly hangs out the side. I'm not a small girl, but I try to avoid tight pants. His size also gets in the way of sex and the activities we do together. He gets tired pretty easily.  \n\nHe's a wonderful, kind, sweet, generous human being -- pretty much one of the best human beings you can imagine, so I feel like such a schmuck having these feelings. I love spending time with him. I don't know why it didn't bother me before -- it's only been in the last few weeks where it's bugged me. \n\nI mean, people are kind of gross, anyway. Is this stupid to break up over? Why is this happening now and not before?", "summary": "My boyfriend of only a few months is starting to gross me out. He is sort of a sloppy dresser and is overweight and has a hard time keeping up with activities and sex but is a tremendously wonderful human being."}
{"id": "t3_1w5hlu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (F20) worried that my boyfriend (M21) isn't over his ex girlfriend.", "post": "We've been dating for over a year.\n\nHe dated this girl the summer between his junior and senior year in high school.  They dated for 3 months I think?  Anyway, she was his first kiss, first prom date, etc.  They didn't kiss and most of their relationship they were apart (he lives in Oregon during the summer).  Whenever he speaks about her, he says that he really liked her.  He told me specifically that he never LOVED her though.  Well, last night, he was drunk and said that she was his \"first love.\" The next morning I asked him about this and he said that he was drunk and being emotional and meant puppy love, and that he never actually loved her, and that I'm his first true love.  \n\nWell, I'm a little worried that he still likes her or has feelings for her of some sort...  I'll admit, I've snooped a few times on his computer (which is NOT okay...haven't done it in a long time)... but he did go on her Facebook every once in awhile.  \n\nI'm just really confused about why he is still wondering about his HIGH SCHOOL girlfriend...of FIVE years ago... strange?", "summary": "Boyfriend still FB stalks his high school girlfriend from time to time and told me when he was very drunk that she was his first love."}
{"id": "t3_1mav9b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My ex boyfriend[19M] and I[19F] have no idea how to be just friends, and no idea how to be apart.", "post": "My ex-boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years on and off. And best friends for nearly 5. We decided to break up at the end of May because of distance.\n\nWe love each other, we wanted to get married, but seeing as I don't want to give up my dreams and he is stuck under contract with the military for another 4 years marriage seemed highly unlikely. \n\nI had/have been holding myself back for over a year trying to match my life up with his so I could move to be with him. As much as our relationship was wonderful, our LDR was tearing me apart. He saw this, and decided it was time to end it. Our break up was fairly mutual, we both knew that our relationship was holding us back from growing up. But our feelings never truly left. \n\nBetween the end of May and now, He and I have tried desperately to break contact. I tell him no more, we can't be \"just friends\". So we stop talking, within two weeks one of us will break down and seek out the other. Then we decide to be \"just friends\" because not talking is too painful but this turns into sexting, I love you's, and talking on the phone every night. We spend hours and hours invested in each other.  We basically go back to what we were before. \n\nWe decided that we can't do this anymore for the fourth time tonight. It's like a drug addiction and we keep relapsing. How do we end our relationship cleanly despite our feelings?", "summary": "Ex and I broke up because of LDR, can't seem to end contact for more than a few weeks, keep going back to each other. How do we end our relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_4ad2z2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Confused as to whether my (20F) boyfriend's (22F) brother (19M) dislikes me or not?", "post": "Hello everyone! I've already asked this on another thread but didn't put all the info in and didn't ask for advice. \n\nSo I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for three and a half years now, and I regularly stay at his house where he still lives with his parents and brother. I've been pretty friendly with his brother this whole time but I have a feeling he may dislike me...\n\n We talk sometimes and he will show me things he thinks I'll like, like videos or music, and will watch TV with my boyfriend and I, which all says that he does think of me in a good way. \n\nBut he will sometimes seemingly go out of his way to ignore me, like sitting at the other end of the house instead of in his room near us (which he would never do if it was just my boyfriend there), and he won't ever sit next to me. Even if there's a lot of room on the sofa next to me, he will outright refuse to sit there if I'm going to be \"next\" to him, but if my boyfriend and I switch sides he will sit there. \n\nThese things kind of make me think he doesn't like me and he doesn't want to be near me. It's making me feel awkward. Does he dislike me or not? If he does, is there anything I can do?", "summary": "Boyfriend's brother acts friendly and nice, then avoids me and will go out of his way not to sit near me. Want to know if he dislikes and what to do if he does."}
{"id": "t3_3j63s2", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Life is much easier when you're single and not in love.", "post": "When you're single, you don't have to worry about looking good for your SO. You don't have to stress about making your woman happy by doing stupid small things she likes. No arguing over forgetting to put the toilet seat down, no debating over what TV show to watch. No need to blow money on dates. No need to listen about dumb crap that her friends went through. If you want to hang out and watch sports and drink with your friends, you don't need to clear it with \"bae\". Being in a relationship will suck you dry. Not dating/being in love is much less stressful and happier. \n\nMy friend has been in a relationship for years and his girlfriend is suffocating him with drama and BS and he puts up with it. After personal experiences, I can testify that stressing over someone who may or may not like you, and then finding out they don't and they exile you, is a waste of time. Being single and not romantically interested in anybody is a simpler way to live life.", "summary": "Life is much better and less stressful when you are single and not crushing on anyone. Personal experience has shown me that liking someone and dating is very stressful on the soul and body."}
{"id": "t3_3fxyl3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with my friend [20 F] of three years, are meeting for the first time and it could decide if I move to be with her.", "post": "I have known this girl for almost three years now and we are going to be meeting soon (about a month and a half away). A few months ago, we shared some dreams that we had when we were younger (Me 17 and her 14). It turns out that we were dreaming about our significant other and we had incredibly similar dreams just from our perspectives. Everything in our dreams matched up, the house, me driving up the driveway, her at the front porch, even the time of the year. (Note: We had no idea each other existed until I was 20)\n\nI had a crush on her before we shared the dreams, but my feelings have only grown stronger since. The issue is, we live on opposite sides of the country. I am a college graduate looking for a career job and I am willing to move closer to her to give us a shot.\n\nThe true problem is, anytime I try to talk about us (me moving out there/her feelings about all of this), she shuts me down. We both agree that this is something special and are interested in seeing what we could be, but until I move out there, we are going to remain friends. I am, and have been very open about how I feel about this with her and she has been really reserved about her feelings. \n\nMy question is, how do I handle this? I want to respect her wishes to not discuss this, because she just wants to let things play out without thinking about it too much. But I feel like I have to make a choice on moving across the country, and can't just leave that up to fate...", "summary": "Anytime I try to discuss moving closer to my friend, so we could date, she avoids talking about us and stops responding all together."}
{"id": "t3_eopcn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Friend troubles?", "post": "My friend (male) and I (female) are freshmen in college, respectively 19 and 18. We've known each other since Freshmen year in high school but didn't become real friends until earlier this year when I broke up with my high school boyfriend who was a mutual friend. \n\nFor the past few months, everything with my friend has been great. We used to have \"deep\" conversations but funnily enough, that was only when he was still dating his girlfriend (they broke up around the same time as my BF and I). \n\nIn the past month or so, he's been acting really strange. I feel like he's starting to pick fights for no reason. He'll ask me if I'm up to anything and I'll say something, he tries to press further (\"Is there anything troubling you\") and I'll say I'm fine and as soon as I say that, he'll get upset. Yesterday we were having a seemingly fine conversation via IM and he did it again, when I asked him what was going on he called me a bitch and logged off. I'm getting concerned because I genuinely enjoy his company, so long as he isn't acting this way.", "summary": "Guy friend is being weird all of a sudden. What's going on? Let me know if you need more information."}
{"id": "t3_f8jhh", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Reaching out to people with psi powers...", "post": "For me, it is very intriguing.  I have noticed, within the past 2 years, I have experienced some of the controversial powers and especially as of late.  \n\nI have have the most vivid dreams where I toss and turn and go in and out of conscious.  I don't know what is reality.  Occasionally from people the next day I will get a text asking if I was ok because they had a dream about me.  They are the people I have in the dream. \n\nI've only become interested in honing them in recently.  A lot of times I start thinking about a person and they text me.  I know this could be coincidence if I was talking to the person recently, but sometimes it is very random.  One time I just focused on a person for one minute and kept saying over and over in my mind text me and when I gave up, 10 seconds later I received a text from them. Often I get the \"omg I was just thinking of you... or I was just about to call you..\"\n\nAnother time I was in the biggest rage of my life, beyond furious, like I could have murdered someone. I put a hole through my wall.  So right after, I was talking to my roommate and all the sudden in the midst of my rage we hear a loud buzzing in my bathroom.  An electric razor turned on. Not only was it turned on the button was smashed in and no longer could be turned off.  Was this a manifestation of my rage? I have no clue but it definitely can't be explained. \n\nI've taken psychic tests and when I focus and clear my mind I receive scores that are classified as paranormal.  I don't know how to classify my experiences:  empathy, precognition, telepathy, ESP?", "summary": "If there is anyone else out there like this or with psychic abilities, then have you tried to develop them? IF so, how ? "}
{"id": "t3_4jsj0k", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "Photography advice needed!", "post": "My wedding is rapidly approaching (a Friday in August). I haven't solved my photography dilemma yet and I could really use some advice. \n\nIdeally, I would like to hire a photographer for just a few hours. I'd like to have group family photos (and photos of me and FH) taken before the ceremony, maybe an hour total. I would also like photos to be taken during the ceremony, which should only last about 20 minutes, and during the hour-long cocktail hour. Plus maybe the first 45 minutes or hour of the reception, but that's negotiable. That's about three or four hours total. I don't have a bridal party and the number of people I want in the photos is probably a total of 20 (most of whom will be only in a couple of photos). I do not expect an album of 500 wedding photos.\n\nI truly value photography as an art and don't want to come across as insulting. It's just that my FH and I aren't terribly keen on posing for photos. Here's what I don't want: cutesy group photos, photos of my FH and I gazing longingly at each other, getting ready photos, photos of my dress before I put it on, ring photos, etc. It's not about money. I just don't need a full day of photography.\n\nSo my questions are: is it possible to find a decent quality photographer willing to do this? If so, how do I go about finding one? How much should I expect to pay (very, very generally)? I am hoping the fact that my wedding is on a Friday will help me out here, as I would never expect to find a photographer willing to forego the typical wedding photo package on a Saturday during the height of wedding season in a very popular wedding destination (coastal Maine). I am even open to hiring a student photographer.\n\nAny advice or suggestions would be greatly appreciated!", "summary": "I am looking for a photographer for just a few hours on a Friday in August. Wondering if this is even an option."}
{"id": "t3_4mhvoe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[19/m] Losing sense of romance.", "post": "Hello, sitting here 5:16 a.m as of writing this and was thinking about the relationships I've had with other men. Very few times have I ever felt anything for them, but I have had the feeling of infatuation towards a few- never lasting long, burning out quick.\n\n I understand I'm young but it's becoming insulting to hear \"give it time, you're still young\" I'm more emotionally intelligent than most married couples... Been on some amazing dates, romantic moments and treated like a king, but all I feel is this almost shallow or empty feeling.\n\n I'll give an example of this guy/28 I met and was in the company of for about 3 months: We met over drinks and enjoyed nice conversation- clicked very nicely, awesome sex, awesome communication, got the type of affection I need (petting, physical) but all that time was in vain really, he thought we were going somewhere and asked me in a corny but sweet way to be his boyfriend and I declined. He was in tears and asked me \"Why? You asshole! You don't even look like you care!\" \"piece of shit!\" But that's my fault, I didn't have any feelings for him like that, I should have seen the signs that he was falling but I just indulged him I guess, till it blew up in my face and tried to be honest.\n\n Now I spend my time hooking up with randoms, most want to see me again because they \"like\" me I tell them not to expect more from me. But why? Why don't I have more? Why is it when people start to have feeling for me is when I realize the most that I never had feeling for them?\n\nI need someone to talk to about this- no one I know has been able to help me, haven't asked best friend but I doubt she'll have the insight to resolve this (I don't mean this in a mean way, shes honestly my life)", "summary": "[19/M] Relationships (with other guys- if that helps) end up nowhere because I cant return feelings- Why don't I ever return feelings even when everything is right?"}
{"id": "t3_2b29hf", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Need another step past working out and eating healthy", "post": "I'm a 23 yr old female and have been an athlete my whole life. I played 4 years of softball in college and was in pretty good shape. That was obviously attained with a ton of vigorous exercise. I am a year out of school now and have put on about 20 pounds. A blown-out knee suffered in my last year somewhat derailed my workouts for a bit immediately after the season. I did not get my knee fixed as I found myself to be able to live through the pain. I've always been a bit thicker/muscular as a power hitter and catcher. I weighed 180 throughout most of my playing days, with a minimum of 170 3 years ago attained through illness. Now I am sitting around at about 205-210.\n\n I am by no means obese, I still carry a lot of muscle mass, but I would like to get to a normal fit living weight of 160. My exercise regime is working out 6 days a week. Each including full body circuit style strength training around 30 min and either a run (2-3 miles)/bike (5-6 miles)/elliptical(30 min) session involving intervals. \n\nMy problem is the inability to lose any weight. I think my body is used to a pretty high intensity workout program therefore that isn't helping me cut weight. I can't quite go back to old exercise habits as my knee hates jumping, heavy squats, excessive running. My diet consists of mostly veggies and fruits during the day and then a larger sit down dinner with my family consisting of a meat, veggie, potato/pasta. I recently found myself to be lactose sensitive, so maybe cutting dairy out will provide positive results. Using my calorie tracker, I am usually right around 1500 cals/day. I admit to frequent (weekend) drinking, but I try to alter my food cal intake those days to make room for the booze.\n\nI am out of ideas on how to shed these pounds. I really don't want to have to go to extreme paleo or upping my exercise routine. Thinking maybe I have additional sensitivities to foods that won't burn off for me? I need some tips and ideas on how to get this moving!!", "summary": "active, healthy eater struggling to see changes in weight/body. Need extra tips, advice, stories on what has worked for others with this problem."}
{"id": "t3_2tumfg", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "I've been working at my job for 3 months now and I'm trying to figure out a plan to move up in the future but there's a problem.", "post": "I'm making this because I just got an email from a recruiter about a potential other position, which I don't plan to interview for since I only worked at my company for 3 months so far.\n\nThe problem is that for being a big company, there just doesn't seem to be any way I can think of of moving up in the company. I spoke to my bosses and asked around, but all I got from them was the standard \"Learn about the industry\" answer. I look at people in my department, all older than me by about 20-25 years, all seem to have just gotten a change in title without any real authority or sense of moving up. \n\nEvery time I speak to my dad about it, he says to me \"I want you to have a plan\" and when I try to explain all of this to him, he gets upset and repeats that he doesn't know what I do. I have some type of plan but it really doesn't involve staying at this company because I just don't see an opportunity to grow unless I go into another division of the company since it's such a large company (though I don't see many opportunities at the moment for other divisions). \n\nNow, this part isn't really pertinent to anything but, my dad and I got into the dumbest argument about salary. He claims that people talk and everyone in my department knows how much I make/how much the other people in the department make. I'm trying to argue that it's not true and only management/HR knows. My dad comes from a stock market background where everyone basically has an idea how much other people make based on clientele and it seems that he just thinks snooping around for a person's salary is appropriate conversation or something. He even claims that a person should ask about salary in the interview, which I disagree with unless it's brought up by the interviewer.", "summary": "Not sure how to move up in my company aside from going to a different division when the opportunity pops up. Got into a dumb argument with my dad about who knows what about a person's salary."}
{"id": "t3_1tnvtr", "subreddit": "college", "title": "Need advice on next year and transfer", "post": "Hi reddit,\nI did not do well in high school and I got accepted into a B tier liberal arts college. I just finished my first semester in college as a freshman and my GPA is currently 2.4. Its really bad and I know I can do better. I let procrastination take control all the time but Im doing a lot better than I did in high school. \n\nI want to transfer after my sophomore year, if I get really good GPA's from now on (3.5+), will I have a shot at transferring to a uni such as NYU, UC Davis, USC, etc...? \n\nClass I took so far, Physics (Calc based) 1, Calculus 1, Microeconomics, and Writing composition. Im about to take Physics (calc based) 2, calc 2, Macroeconomics, and Computer science next semester. Im currently not sure what I want to major in, but Im leaning towards a Major in Physics and Minor in Economics.", "summary": "Did bad in HS, Did bad in first semester of Freshman year, what can i do to get a successful transfer to a good uni?"}
{"id": "t3_sx7vz", "subreddit": "GetMotivated", "title": "Determination is contagious", "post": "The competitive cycling season is well underway where I live, and I've been training all Winter and Spring to prepare for it. Last night I was waffling about attending today's race on account of the 40F + rain forecast. Late last night I worked up the resolve to race anyway, and sent my teammate the following text message:\n\n>Fuck it I am going to htfu and go race tomorrow. Are you in?\n\nWe ended up coordinating our carpool over email, so as I sat outside his house this morning to pick him up, I gave him a call to see if he was ready yet. I hear someone else's voicemail answer the phone shortly before the following text message conversation ensues:\n\n>I think u have the wrong number but I agree--you should go race--good luck\n\n>>Hah, yeah I figured that out when I got your voicemail. Sorry, and thanks!\n\n>U bet--thanks for the motivation to get my butt on the treadmill this a.m.!:D", "summary": "Forced myself to go race in the cold and rain today, and convinced a complete stranger to go through with her morning workout as well. *Canis lupus* is contagious."}
{"id": "t3_n12sj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Want to commit, but our long-term plans aren't compatible. Help?", "post": "Alright, reddit. I've been stuck on this for some time now, and all of my friends can only seem to come up with \"wow...that sucks\". (understandably) But, maybe there's someone here with some life experience that can be relatable.\n\nMyself (female) and my boyfriend have been dating for over 2 years. He's 29, I'm 23. We've had a pretty hefty share of hardships, but we've fought through and we're a stronger couple than ever. He is in every way my perfect complement, and vice versa. He treats me with respect, is always honest with me, and more supportive and patient than anyone I've ever met. We work so well together.\n\nThe problems come in with our plans for the future. I am going into my last semester of college. He's been out for a few years, and is going to be going to grad school next spring for a master's in video game design. I think it's awesome, and I think he'll be amazing at it, but I know that will require a lot of moving for at least the first 5-10 year chunk of his career. This doesn't fit too well with my dream, which is to open up my own photography studio and be a small business owner. Picking up and moving every 2 years doesn't really suit that.\n\nThe bigger issue is this: He has absolutely zero interest in having children. None whatsoever. I have never even considered NOT having children until he came along. I keep trying to tell myself that I can manage without them, that I can find work/volunteer work with children, and still find fulfillment there. But...I really don't know if that's true.\n\nMy response to this would probably just be to wait it out, enjoy my time with him, and see where our lives take us. However, his grad school endeavors have put us on a timetable. The school he's attending is on the other side of the country. So, effectively, I have a year, and then it's game point: Commit, and move away from everything I know to be with him in a future I am profoundly uncertain of, or abandon this man that so thoroughly completes me and start all over again.", "summary": "Long-term boyfriend has career plans that don't fit with mine at all, has no interest in children whereas I definitely do."}
{"id": "t3_ulmzu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Guy I'm dating has been distant lately.", "post": "Let's call these people A and R.\nR= my good friend who I met from college. (22)\nA= R's best friend, guy I am currently dating. (22)\nMe= 20\n\nAnyway, R and I started hanging out and talking to each other around December of last year. Eventually I met A in February of this year and we started going on dates in March. We slept together in May...obviously we moved a bit fast but we both didn't really find it an issue. We saw each other a lot, whether it was just the two of us hanging out or the trio all together. In early May, R had to go away for military training for 2 weeks. In those two weeks A and I got pretty close emotionally, with him sharing some personal stuff with me, showing me childhood places of memory, etc. But when R got back...things were different. All of a sudden we see each other maybe once or twice a week instead of the 3 or 4 that we did. We started having sex less.  The texting/messaging/effort to talk to me slowed down. Compliments are slowed down as well.\n\nWhile this could be due to outside reasons (he's taking 3 online classes over the summer and working more), part of me is taking wisdom from \"He's Just Not That Into You\" and thinking that if the guy really liked me, he would make more of an effort like he used to- I mean shit...it's been only like 2 months, little early to get bored in a relationship. \n\nThe other day I asked him straight up if he was still interested in pursuing a relationship with me and he seemed taken aback that I thought otherwise. I explained to him how I'm feeling and he thinks I'm worrying too much. I hate to use facebook as an example but when people chat with him on there he replies a lot quicker and more often than if I do so.\n\nAm I worrying too much or is this just a dying ship that I need to hop off of?", "summary": "Guy I'm into has suddenly stopped giving me compliments, asking to hang out, etc. He claims nothing is wrong/changed in the relationship. I don't know whether to stay or not."}
{"id": "t3_1xi4i8", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [21F] recently learnt that my ex [22M] was talking to another ex [25M] of mine during the last parts of our relationship. Should I ask what was said or just let it lie?", "post": "My longtime SO (we'll call him A) and I broke up a little under a year ago. It was mutual and friendly. I have been struggling with depression for all my life and during the last few months of my relationship with A I was particularly low. I knew that A and my sister were talking extensively about trying to force me into psychiatric therapy and had a system of checking up on me (one would text me every hour or so if I wasn't with one of them), but I was never sure what spurred them to do so.\n\nMy sister visited this holiday season and confessed to me that another ex of mine (who she and A just know as a former friend... we'll call him D) had been in contact with them because he was worried for me. D and I had been in an LDR for a number of years and we still talked almost every day after we broke things off. The relationship wasn't healthy and he was mentally abusive to me. When I was particularly bad he would threaten to reveal how unstable I was to my family in a malicious way. After we broke up he backed off a bit. But I'm still concerned and curious as to what he said. So, do I call up A and ask him what went on? Or should I let sleeping dogs lie? A and I have both moved on and are in infrequent contact with each other. I have since proceeded to seek psychiatric treatment.", "summary": "I'm concerned that an ex of mine may've lied to my sister and more recent ex during the end of the recent ex's relationship with me. Should I bother dredging up the past?"}
{"id": "t3_16unde", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A 21M is falling for his 20F best friend....What should I do?", "post": "Here's a little background on us\nWe have been friends since I was a junior in high school. We have always just kinda clicked and gotten along really well. I find her very attractive and wonderful.I enjoy her company and I think she enjoys mine because she laughs at my jokes/me alot (in a good way). I'm not afraid to talk to her about my problems or anything. and we have a pact to get married when she turns 30 (if we havent found another person)\nNow we are juniors in college, and we both go to the same university (It has 50,000 students). While we have different sets of friends, and dont see each other but maybe 2-3 times a month. we are still close.\nWell today I went to go try on this pair of boots I had made (its part of my schools military tradition, hard to explain). Its a pretty big deal and I asked her to come with me to take some pictures. While we were waiting for others in line to finish, we were talking and hanging out. She always puts her head on my shoulders or messes with my phones. makes us take selfies, etc. Its almost always like this whenever we hang out.\nAfter we left the shoe place, my buddy who also came with us to the shoe place asked what the deal was between me and her. He said it seems like you have feelings for her (which I do) and she has feelings for me. He said we are just really good together. Several of my other friends who have met her/been around us have said the same thing. I don't know how she feels about me, because I have always felt hat she just views me as her close guy friend.\nHowever, I love our friendship between me and her too much to try and jeopradize our friendship or make it awkward between us. What do you r/askwomen think I should do? (should I just continue being friends or tell her how I feel? )", "summary": "Best friends since highschool, like her lots, but dont want to ruin the friendship by opening up about my feelings for her. Not sure what to do"}
{"id": "t3_32a3pv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] got invited last minute to a BBQ and my friend [25F] yelled at me and accused me of stalking her. Wouldnt stop screaming until I left.", "post": "Jill and I share the same friend group. I have actually know Russel [25m] for about a decade now. Jill thinks Russel has a crush on her and always talks about him like he is some sort of Hercules. In reality, Russel and I have slept together in the past and continue to do so. I don't share my sex life with people and Jill has been told by Russ that he doesn't like her, has other interests, and really would prefer she kept it cool. \n\nRuss invited Jill to a BBQ and told her to tell me, and two other girls (Megan and Tina) (24f). Jill told them, but not me. Megan finally asked me for a ride to the BBQ and asked if I had made anything. I called Russel and asked him, he said I was invited, and was surprised I didn't know. He'd told Jill 3 weeks ago, since we are all really close (and Jill lives with Megan, who I spend a lot of time with). \n\nI brought Megan and Jill freaks out at the BBQ, accuses me of stalking her, trying to embarrass her. She was trying to hook up with Russ the whole night. She pretty much screamed at me until Megan and I left, Tina staying to calm her down.\n\nI am not sure what to do about this. I like Jill, but I am not sure what made her freak out on me like this. I am not sure why she thinks she can talk to me like that. I just don't deal well with conflict. What happened?", "summary": "Friend tried to lie about me being invited to a BBQ, accused me of stalking her and trying to ruin her chances with Russ."}
{"id": "t3_qe789", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, What's the most bizarre reason you've ever seen someone get kicked out of class?", "post": "Inspired by this post, \n\nI'll go ahead and start it's a little long so bear with me. A long time ago in Jr. Highschool I had this teacher, we'll call her Mrs. R. Mrs. R was just genuinely unlikeable as ar as teachers go. She had bad breath, treated us all like we were 5, took her class way to seriously, and never gave students second chances on anything. So one day I decided it would be funny to rip a massive fart in the middle of her trying to teach the class something. I went over it with my buddies and they all thought it would be hilarious. Thus, Operation Massive Rip was born.\n\nSo basically, Op: MR went something like this. She was in the middle of discussing plot structure or something and I had finally built up enough pressure to let one rip. I let out the loudest earth shaking fart the world had ever seen. My friends in the class started laughing hysterically which led to everyone else laughing. Mrs. R, the bad breath smelling party pooper she was,  got red faced and decided to kick me out of the class. She then sent me to another teacher's classroom where I had to copy 4-5 sentences saying bodily functions are inappropriate in the classroom 100 times. To this day, I have never seen a crazier reason to be kicked out of a classroom.\n\nSo Reddit, what's the craziest reason you've ever seen someone be sent out of the classroom?", "summary": "Ripped a massive fart in class, got kicked out and had to write sentences on how farting in class is wrong."}
{"id": "t3_odglu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need all the advice I can get.", "post": "Ten months ago my girlfriend of nearly two years and I broke up. Her and I were perfect for each other. We got along better than I've ever gotten along with anyone, and we had more fun than you could imagine. We clicked- any problem that we had we could always work through. She made me feel a way I could never explain. I love her with all my heart, and I know that I will never again meet anyone as incredible as she was, and that I will never be able to love anyone in the way that I love her. To me, she is more beautiful than any supermodel or movie star, and it was as if our personalities were made to be together.\n\nTen months later, I am starting to realize that I am not going to be able to get her back. I have had a positive attitude throughout, thinking that if I believed things would get better they really would. I've been depressed, and am finally starting to realize that this miracle I've been hoping for may not come. \n\nI love her so completely and fully that I don't think I'll ever be able to get her out of my heart, and even if I met someone else I know it wouldn't ever be the same.\n\nReddit has been one of the things that has made me happy in this dark time of my life, so I need to ask you, what do I do now? What advice can you give?", "summary": "I love someone with everything I've got, and I can't get her back. WhatthefuckdoIdo?"}
{"id": "t3_32ga6j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [13F] with my brother [19 M] I'm at my wits end and he's about to make the worst decision of his life.", "post": "My brother D, is about to make the worst decision of his life. His girlfriend is absolute trash. She's the worst person I've ever met in my entire life. She brought weed and alcohol into my GRANDPARENTS house. He's lived with them for a year. His girlfriend has cheated on him. His girlfriend is stealing what little amount of money he has. They both work at mcdonalds. She's using him for a ride to work. She doesn't let him come over and she's not allowed to my house or our grandparents who lives behind us. \n\nThey've decided that they're gonna move out into an apartment together. In one of the worst neighborhoods in our state. He will most likely be shot, or robbed. His gf will make him pay for everything. They're doing a section 8, or something. Whatever it is it's gonna go on his record and his credits gonna go to crap.\n\nWe've tried multiple times to talk to him and make him realize what's going on and how messed up everything is. I love him but I can't take it anymore. What do I do, reddit?", "summary": "My brother is with a horrible woman, he's about to get an apartment with her in one of the worst neighborhoods in my state. Please help me reddit, I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_wnif9", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "This guy keeps fucking with my head.  Am I on his hook?", "post": "So, I'm an 18 year old female and he's an 18 year old male.\n\nWe met in a class we had together while I had a boyfriend but always got along and one time he came over to my apartment and smoked with me alone--I never told my boyfriend but nothing happened.\n\nThen when the class ended he stopped talking to me.  A few months later he sent me a long message on FB asking me all of these questions to catch up.  I responded and he never wrote back.\n\nI broke up with my boyfriend a two months ago and made it \"FB official\" and a couple of weeks later he texted me to say Hi.\n\nThen we talked for a while and were sending flirty texts.  So then he said that he was going to call me and never did.  For a week after that he didn't talk to me.  \n\nThen I texted him and he said that he was really busy this week and said how are you sweetie...we talked for a bit and I said Why didn't you end up calling me? to which he never replied.  \n\nSo then a few days later I texted him again and we talked and I asked him if he wanted to hang out with me tonight and of course he didn't respond.\n\nAm I fucking pathetic?  Why is he sending me all of these mixed signals?", "summary": "This guy keeps contacting me and seeming interested but whenever I show interest he withdraws and makes me feel stupid for reciprocating.  What's up with that? I don't get it."}
{"id": "t3_48ul70", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 M] am feeling burnt out on dating", "post": "This isn't really looking for advice, more just venting because it's been an annoying few days. So I am in college, 22, regular guy as far as I can tell. I've had a couple long term relationships before but lately it just seems like I've been hitting a serious bump in my dating.\n\nStart of fall semester my gf left me for another guy. Then a few months later after I started dating again had 1 girl give me the \"I don't wanna date\" lie then get a new bf, had 2 girls ghost on me and had another just say no. \n\nStart of this year I figured I'd try and turn over a new leaf, had 2 girls I thought were interested. Went on a couple dates with 1, she seemed very interested then randomly she just stopped talking to me. The other also seemed interested, got her number and she just never replied. Truth be told after all of this I am just really sick of dating and trying, since it usually leads to me feeling like crap.", "summary": "Haven't had much dating luck lately and am feeling done trying for a while. Am I crazy for feeling that way?"}
{"id": "t3_e70c2", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Does anybody else ever get this?", "post": "Hokay, \n\nI was chilling out, maxin etc. listening to Mumford & Sons song \"After The Storm\" when I heard the lyrics \"Because death is just so full and man so small\" and for a split-second after that my brain was in overdrive and it felt like I had just gained the power to contemplate human existence, like a genuine shock.\n\nObviously, propelled by my own astonishment I tried to return to the thought, hoping for the same emotions. By this stage it was too late though, I was a mere mortal again, and saw death as a part of life but was unable to comprehend the sheer severity of it. \n\nI'm finding this much harder to explain than I thought, but this isn't the only time it's happened. When thinking about the millions who died in WWII I was suddenly struck for a split second and that tumultuous times people were put through to defend our country, then returning to the thought, it was impossible to comprehend again.", "summary": "For the smallest of moments, my brain goes into slight shock when I comprehend the severity and scale of something, to have it soon return to normality."}
{"id": "t3_1c746s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (29 M) am trying to figure out if my relationship with my gf (27 F) is just in a rough patch or if its time to move on", "post": "My gf and I have been dating for a year and a half, and are about to start trying the long distance thing because I have to move for work.  \n\nRecently she had to move into a new apartment, and I moved in with her as my current lease ends two months before I have to move.\n\nFor the past 6 weeks she has grown emotionally cold towards me, which she attributes to being too stressed with everything in her life.  I've been supportive and tried to hear her out, offer advice if asked, and try to make her happy still whenever the opportunity presents itself.  But the relationship has been growing colder from her end, and more than once she's told me she's been yelling at me just to hurt me and act out.  She is an only child and states that \"this is how I (she) am, I'm selfish and you should know that about me\".   She has flat out told me that my presence in the apartment now is distressing for her, and its starting to make me feel like I'm unwanted here.  \n\nThis is despite the fact that I have helped move her out of her old place on my own while she was too busy at work, sacrificed my own time on setting up her (our) new place, dealt with my own family members turning gravely sick (for which she hasn't even tried talking to me about despite me being obviously distressed about it) and have been  solely taking care of a new dog we got together.\n\nI know it sounds like I'm rambling, but I've talked with her a lot about these issues and been very direct about how I feel that she's taking her frustrations about her job/personal responsibilities out on our relationship and on me.... The thing is, I'm trying to figure out if I'm just not being understanding enough about her life right now or if enough is enough and I should just make do for the next two months and start fresh and single when I move to another city.", "summary": "I think my gf has grown distant to me and I can't tell whether I should be patient/understanding or if its time to move on"}
{"id": "t3_1k2cmq", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Fallen off the wagon, I think...", "post": "Hi everyone - I see some people post here when they feel like they've fallen off the wagon in terms of dieting and exercise and the amazing community here is able to pick them right back up. \n\nI've been incredibly stressed recently, and when I am stressed I tend to eat. Luckily I normally only have \"healthy\" food in my house (save for a few items, such as some cereals, etc). But the problem is that I end up binge eating to the point where I'm uncomfortable. \n\nThis has been going on a about a week now (big job interview, broke up with my girlfriend, unfulfilled in other aspects of my life). I feel like I am easily stressed and I still turn to food for comfort, and since I've been busy (and to be honest, unmotivated) I haven't been going to the gym consistently.\n\nOver the past couple days I have gained a few pounds back (I was very close to my target weight) and I would like to nip this in the bud before it gets any worse. Has anyone been in my situation before and how did you overcome the stress and the almost overwhelming desire to stuff your face until you felt sick and terrible about yourself?", "summary": "Was doing well; loads of stressful events occured; turn to food for comfort; want to deal with this before it gets out of hand."}
{"id": "t3_te5bx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "SO is not trustworthy and still wants to \"hang out\" with an ex lover, but has big double standards. What do I do?", "post": "Some background: I'm 20, she is 21. She cheated on her ex (of three years) with me. I was unawares at the time because she said they were through. Fast forward to when she actually broke up with him. She went through a long period before we had begun dating, and during this time it was sketchy at best. We were not dating but had been involved and were considering dating soon. A week before I asked her to be my girlfriend (4 months of being together unofficially) she meets up with a random mutual friend and gets drunk and fucks him. She says she didnt know they would when they were drunk, but thats rediculous because I talked to him and he said they planned to have sex for a long time. (This isn't a huge problem because we werent dating but still concerns me). Did she do this to get it out of the way because she knew she would soon be \"committed?\" She is completely anal about me not talking or even looking in the general direction of a girl whom she thinks I like, however, she can hang out, alone, til 4 in the morning, while we're dating, with a guy she has fucked before. My real question is, am I encroaching on relationship boundaries by asking her to stop hanging out with him? Or is she being rediculous by having this double standard since she has a bad track record with cheating (obviously)? Can I trust her?", "summary": "SO wants to hang with ex fuck buddy but has doble standards about me hanging with ANY female alone. What do I say? Can I trust her? Is she being rediculous?"}
{"id": "t3_1qvpzq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21M] Broke up with my girlfriend [22/F], now we talk, have feelings, afraid to commit.", "post": "I know it's long. If you read and reply, thank you!\n\nI've been dating a girl on and off since I was in high school (about 4 years now). We've broken up several times (I initiated all of the break-ups) and every time we stay apart for a while, but then both admit we miss each other and it's like I fall in love with her all over again. She's incredibly loving and supportive; We never fight and the reason for the breakups basically come from me growing bored of the relationship and feeling that our interests don't align.\n\nI recently moved overseas for work and broke up with her for the reasons above and because of the distance. But after two months of silence, we've been talking regularly and last night we admitted we still have feelings for each other and want to be together but don't know what to do. She told me she'd been with other people in the months we've been broken up, which really hurt me (I know it shouldn't, but it does).\n\nI'm fairly certain I don't want to be with her in the longterm, but I still really love her and the support she gives me. I always wonder whether or not I'll find other people who I'll fall in love with in the same way. I'm really torn here. I am very afraid of commitment (any kind; not just relationships) and I don't want to live just for her. I have other dreams and goals that mean I can't live near her now.\n\nI don't want to lead her on and give her the impression that we're going to be together forever (I'm afraid I've done this recently), but I also really love talking to her and knowing she's there when I need her. \n\nWhat should I do here?", "summary": "Broke up with my girlfriend after being on/off for a while + long distance. Now we talk a lot and I do still love her, but I am afraid of committing as I know it likely won't work out again."}
{"id": "t3_12mlw8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I want to know some of your ideas of getting over an emotional struggle Ex; X's, failures, or just dealing with death", "post": "I realize this is definitely something that has been asked before but I am kind of at a standstill right now in my head and cannot get over one girl I used to know. Honestly, the song produced by Gotye couldn't be anymore true. Beautiful girl, friends for years, finally realize we both like each other but we go to schools in different states, fall in love, she breaks my heart by just cutting me off one day. Literally overnight just stopped talking to me. Ignored everything. It drives me up the wall to this day. \n\nI know I have seen worse situations reading through reddit for a couple of months now BUT trying to feel better about myself because some guy on the internet can sympathize with me only puts me at peace of mind for that instant. So I ask you...\n\nWhat have you done or think yo can do to really push forward in a time where your memories hold so strongly? I am only 20 and I realize I have many more women in my future but it is hard to replace certain people... Mind you I am writing this in November and this is a girl who hasn't spoken to me since the end of August. That is literally how much it affects me.\n\nI guess I will start the thread by suggesting what helps me most but it is what I get least of going to Community College until January. Being surrounded by new friendly faces. Having laughs and new memories with new friendly faces. Getting to know more people. I am very well off socially but I am stuck with the same people I have known since high school because of going to community college. I honestly cannot wait to meet new people at a different school.\n\nSo I guess it is your turn to tell me the best way to travel through forgetting about all the memories you have...honestly if anyone has a better idea than just creating endless new happy memories, my hat is off to you.", "summary": "Try to give real advice on how to get over someone or how to make the best of a situation no matter where you are."}
{"id": "t3_31gt7t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25M] gf [22F] cheated after asking for space.", "post": "So i was supposed to go away for about a week.  Shortly before I left, I had a weird conversation with my gf about whether we should continue seeing each other as she will be moving home from school shortly (roughly an hour away).  \n\nWe reached the conclusion that maybe she needs some space and we would talk more when i got back.  Anyway, we talked very little while i was gone and I had a feeling that something more had happened or was going on.  \n\nI hate myself for doing it because it's not like me at all, however when i got back I checked of her texts and messages between her and her best friends as I figured that they might have talked about what happened between us.  Very quickly I found out that while i was gone she slept with another guy and did something at a bar with a different one.  It sounded like she thought we were broken up while i was gone but the only word we ever used was space.  Anyway, so apparently she wanted to break up with me when i got back without telling me anything for fear of hurting me or something but now I'm not sure that she still wants to break up.\n\nI really do love my girlfriend and I'm not sure how everything got to this point but I think I'd like to give her one more chance if she is willing to be honest with me.  Is that stupid/crazy? Also how should i bring this up to her without causing a blow up?  I still really regret breaking her trust by looking at her messages but I think that my gut feelings were accurate.", "summary": "Went away for a week.  Had a disagreement before i left. Still love her, but i believe that she cheated on me twice while i was gone. "}
{"id": "t3_3dcp1m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (f24) second date with a guy (28) ended incredibly confusing. Need your advice!", "post": "Hey everyone! So I met this wonderfully nice guy online. We talked for weeks (both online and phone calls) before deciding to finally meet. Our first date was pretty casual, we both had a drink at a blues bistro and ended the night with a hug. He even called me as soon as we got home and we talked for even longer. We were so excited about the date that we agreed to meet up again the following night. He's busy with an intense program  at the moment, so he could only meet up for a couple of hours. He asked to come over which I was excited about. So he does and it starts off great, I make us tea, we talk. We then start to cuddle and that's when things get weird. We spoke the night before about how he wanted to kiss me and that I noticed but I wanted to wait until next time. So as we were cuddling I gradually kept making more and more moves initiating a kiss but he was so frigid and distant. I kept asking if everything was alright and whether I had overstepped and boundaries and he kept saying no. So when we finally kissed it was as if I had forced him into it, so much so that now I was uncomfortable for him. So I backed off and asked again if he was ok and he mentioned not wanting things to go to where they were headed (sex) which I had no intention of. But I guess the cuddling and kiss were too much for him. That night was two days ago and I haven't heard from him since (odd for him since he used to text me everyday). I'm just wondering whether to give him space and let him come talk it out whenever he's ready or confront him about it as soon as possible?", "summary": "I met an amazing guy. First date was incredible. Second date was awkward with miscommunication and possibility of me pushing on to him too quickly."}
{"id": "t3_3wthif", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[19M] boyfriend \"looks at\" innocent pictures of girls, and I've made it very clear it bothers me [18F]", "post": "My boyfriend [19M] and I [18F] have been having serious talks about moving in together recently, starting our futures together, etc. But one thing is keeping me from wanting to pursue this relationship any further. \n\nOver the weekend I discovered that he has an Instagram account where he follows over 30 regular looking, younger girls with pictures of them on beach trips, posing with friends, and just average pictures of their lives. When I asked him if he knew any of these girls in real life or anything, my boyfriend said no, he uses them as material to masturbate to. \n\nThis is incredibly weird to me, and I've told him before that I'm uncomfortable with him looking at these images of other women instead of me. He argued that these girls are \"sluts\" and are posting these pictures because they want guys online to look at them. I disagree. These are younger girls who are just posting a beach picture here and there. They are not \"sluts\" by any means I don't think. \n\nMy boyfriend said he would delete the Instagram account since it made me so uncomfortable and I began crying when he made the above argument. Is it even worth it making him delete the account? I've been so creeped out ever since discovering it and am rethinking everything.", "summary": "Boyfriend looks at pictures of girls on Instagram account and masturbates to their bikini pictures/selifes. This is incredibly disturbing to me. What actions should I take to save my relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_1s6tep", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "I'm wondering if the hair loss on my dog's tail is permanent?", "post": "I adopted my dog from a shelter in March this year. She was missing almost all the hair on her tail due to malnutrition, and also had a case of \"happy tail.\" She also had some skin irritation due to allergies. \n\nA lot of the hair has grown back, but in all of the places where the hair lost was the worst, it still hasn't grown back all the way. It looks like just the undercoat is there. Back in March our vet said it would come back and to give it time, and recently has said not to worry about it since she is otherwise healthy. \n\nWe have recently switched to Blue Buffalo. She was on Rachel Ray Just 6. She has also been given fish oil supplements. She has had a skin scrape, so the hair loss is not from an infection.", "summary": "Dog is missing hair on tail since March and it hasn't grown back all the way. She does not have a skin infection."}
{"id": "t3_2j5v5i", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by causing a bug infestation in my oven", "post": "This one's been marinating for a whole and is one of the most disgusting things I've ever done. About a month ago I made an amazing dinner consisting of delicious braised short ribs. Because of a recent injury rendering me unable to walk and some time spent traveling. I wasn't really able to clean my apartment for a while and ended up leaving the remnants of this dinner in the pot (cover on it) in my oven.\nDecided to finally get rid of the congealed mess today by just throwing out the whole pot. I was sure if I opened it I would have opened another Pandora's box and puked all over my kitchen from the stench. \nI opened my oven to see this pot still sitting there with fruit fly eggs all over the top and all over the inside of the oven. Duck taped the pot shut and tossed that mess in the dumpster. I'm guessing I shouldn't use the oven without cleaning this mess out. Since I was too lazy to clean the pot and avoid this whole situation in the first place, I'm probably too lazy to clean the oven out by hand and I'm pretty sure the self clean option is a bad idea. Probably just going to move.", "summary": "left a pot of food in my oven for 1+months. Anyone know how to clean out an oven filled with fruit fly eggs?"}
{"id": "t3_28nr8n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my boyfriend [19 M] of 8 months,are going to have to do LDR, and I have some concerns?", "post": "I have a couple of questions and I would like your view on it: \n\n1. My boyfriend told me that it was fine if I found someone else to be with over the summer and that really upset me and made me feel that he wanted it. I told him that it hurt me and he apologised but is this a deal breaker?\n\n1. We are going to have to do long distance till september,any tips?\n\n1. He had a crush on his best friends sister who is probably going to be around and I feel a bit insecure due to the cheating jokes he use to make (before i told him to stop) how do I deal with this?\n\n1. He doesn't talk to me as much as I wanted him too until I told him to start talking to me more, is that a bad thing?\n\nThank you for taking the time out and reading this and also replying. :)", "summary": "I would like your opinion on some of the problems we are having and what I can do about it please? thank you."}
{"id": "t3_u5omp", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I need help moving on from him...x-post from r/relationships.", "post": "My boyfriend of 6 months and I have been on and off. This time its off for good, is what it seems like. During this breakup process, my ex went off telling everyone we know that I was a liar, and thats all I do...mind you, he says this stuff loud enough that our whole class is eavsdropping on him. We are both 16, btw.\n\nIts like he purposefully brings up topics of conversations that piss me off with the people around us, only when Im around. I overhear him talking about how hes going to hang out with a girl he knows this weekend, and he makes it obvious he wants me to hear. He took out a letter I wrote him that he had on his binder, and replaced it with a picture of his name in bubble letters that his ex drew for him.\n\nHe will text me about personal things in his life that only I know about, and I tell him I hope they turn out for the best and that he ends up happy, and he accuses me of acting fake, &wants me to \"leave him the fuck alone.\" So I do. I dont talk to him or text him, but lately he's texting me, about the stuff that goes on that only I know about him. He said last week that these 6months have been a waste, that he wont have an impression of me at all because from that conversation on, he wont think of me again...that I screwed him over more than anyone else & that Im the reason he will never trust girls again. So I am leaving him alone, but he always talks to me first. Whats up with this?\n\nSomehow, I still love him...I think of all the amazing memories we created and everything we came through together, and I cry...wondering why and how it ends like this. But I'm sick of his shit, and I'm trying to convince myself not to care about him, not to love him, not to wonder what he's doing or what his opinions are of me. How do I do it? I really need help :/ But please, be kind...I know we're 16, but please dont be rude or call him an asshole...serious advice only please.", "summary": "bf of 6 months broke up with me, is trying to make me mad and is doing a very good job at it. Need to move on, but how?"}
{"id": "t3_2rgva7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my best friend[19 F] decided to stop talking to her for few months,did I make a good choice?", "post": "Me and my best friend had been friends for years,she is pretty hot and I am an average looking guy,6 months ago we hooked up,ever since then whenever there is a party we make out,we don't have sex because she doesn't want to.We were kinda in a romantic relationship,we didn't want to go as bf/gf relationship.When I asked her if we should go that way,she said no its good the way it is.I agreed.I dont see her a lot,like maybe 2 times in a month,I want to have sex with her but she doesn't want with me,meanwhile she is having sex with some other dude,which she is probably in a relationship with.But when she's home she always hooks up with me,we both like it.Today I decided to ask her why is it so hard for her to have sex with me,is she uncomforatble with me,am I too ugly for her,then she answered that she doesn't want to ruin our friendship.She says if we do that(sex)we would be a gf and bf,or maybe she was referring that should fell in love with me,that one is tricky for me.I really like her and decided that we should take a time off each other so further feelings wont develop,she doesn't want that,I promised her  that I would make her my girlfriend,she just laughed and replied \"maybe :P\",we both told each other what we don't like about each other...when I told her that we should stop talking to each other,she didn't want to,but I really want that.She got 5 months of school left so I don't want to bother her,and I will use that time to change myself a bit,like something she told me she doesn't like at me,she also promised me to change herself,because I also told her what I dont like about her.DID I DO THE RIGHT THING? please note that i am not doing this becouse she doesnt want to have sex with me\n\nSORRY FOR BAD ENGLISH", "summary": "She doesnt want to be in a relationship currently.We make out for 6 months but doesnt want to have sex,meanwhile she has sex with her \"bf\".Decided to take time off eachother"}
{"id": "t3_2b79m4", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I'm going through a rough patch.", "post": "I was a smart kid. I could ace a biology test without really trying, and I loved to read. But I was also a little shit to others sometimes, and a bit of an ugly duckling. And then, puberty lended a helping hand, and I'm a lot prettier and think at least, I'm a lot nicer.\n\nBut now I'm kind of the 'slow one'. I just don't notice things around me, I don't ever *think*. It was kind of OK when I was a bit of a pixie day dreamer chick a while ago, but even that's gone. Less imagination. I just feel a bit... vacant. I want to be smarter, and my schoolwork has been... lackluster to say the least. I'm not a very hard worker, I'm good at picking up projects and working on them, like making games, wood work, no problem. But writing and essay/research? Heaven forbid. I've always loved english, but I don't even enjoy that anymore. \n\nI'm not particularly witty either, I feel like I should stop trying to be the joker, but then I just don't what to say and just end up saying nothing. So, /r/advice , help me out. What can I do to improve myself?", "summary": "Used to be smart and good at school, and now I'm not because I suck at hardwork. Also, I am not a funny gal, and am about as perceptive as a deaf bat. Help would be appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_1b5io8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend (F 18) has a very good chance on not moving foward, and I don't know what to do.", "post": "So basically one of my friends, seems to be going nowhere with her life, and she has no ambition also. The two of us are seniors, but she hasn't done anything with her life to transition into being a young adult. She didn't take the SAT's not even for in regards for applying to college, but the community college system in my area, it accepts if you get a certain score you can skip english 101 and even get into the scholar program at the community college. She hasn't even looked at what classes she wants to take or save up any kind of funds to pay for it, since her parents won't. Also, she has no prospect or interest getting a job, she hasn't put her self out there in any respect, I almost got her to apply to where I work, but she didn't actually send in the application because her boyfriend said, \"to not conform.\" Okay, her boyfriend is actually a nice guy, I was friends with him before they started dating, it's just that he's a sophomore with pretty bad ADD, who can't really relate to having to be a senior in high school, getting ready to grow up. When my friend started dating this guy last year, she pushed all her friends away and literally her and her boyfriend only hang out with each other. Half of the time this friend doesn't even show up to school, which could prevent her from graduating on time.\n\nHer parents won't disipline her because her own mother lived with her mom (along with her mom's sister) until my friend was 8 years old. My friend's 23 year old sister continues to live with her parents, without having to pay for rent, food or any living expenses, except gas. They're very laisse faire when it comes to raising her, which would be fine if she actually acted like a young adult, but now it feels like she has the maturity of a 14 year old girl for various reasons which are a whole different topic.\n\nWhen I try and suggest she go to trade school or beauty school, she gets insulted because trade school too pedestrian for her, even though her GPA and work ethic is absolute shit.", "summary": "Basically, this friend has no prospect career wise, high education wise or learning a trade and she's just going to live with her parents, extending her childhood because of her sophomore boyfriend and she can't handle an ounce of responsibility."}
{"id": "t3_q9qq5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How should I break off this friendship?", "post": "So I'm friends with this girl and as you can guess, I want it to be something more. I'm no fool, but I know its not happening. But what bugs me is that because I am open 'nice' or whatever, she feels the need to be very close to me, which I enjoy in our friendship, but it also attracts me to her. this has happened before with another girl and my solution was that I just shut her out of my life after telling her. but I can't do the same thing with this girl on account that we're going to be in all the same classes for the next 2 years. I am thinking of telling her how I feel, and telling her that I know how she feels, and that a potential solution, would be to keep the friendship superficial.", "summary": "guy is friends with a girl. progress to friendzone relationship. How do I take care of this the right way?"}
{"id": "t3_552z9g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "me (23f) lying to my boyfriend (27) about smoking", "post": "So, I've been a smoker since I was 14 years old, I realize at this point how horrible it is for my health and after many failed attempts to quit I seem to be having an extremely hard time. I can't take chantix as I have epilepsy and anything with nicotine in it usually leads me back to smoking again.  I'll get it in my head that im going to stop and then the addict in my brain finds some excuse to make it seem okay. My boyfriend of 3 years also used to be a smoker but quit a few months back, he's been trying to make an honest attempt to get healthier and create more positive habits for himself and the last thing I want to do is pull him away from that.\n\nHe's caught me lying a few times the past couple weeks. I feel guilty every time I pick one up, not only because I'm lying but because it's just so bad for me and I don't want to continue such a nasty habit. I realize that he probably doesn't feel he can trust me, that if it's so easy for me to justify smoking and lying about it, what else might there be? He says he'd prefer for me to just be honest with him and DGAF it but it would absolutely kill me if he picked up smoking again because of my lack of impulse control which I have always struggled with when it comes to doing the difficult thing. I'm afraid of failing and I know that's exactly what im doing by not trying.\n\nI need to quit smoking, I need to work on healthier habits and I'm having an extremely difficult time working through the mental gymnastics that is impulse control and gaining motivation. Any advice on working towards becoming healthier and dealing with this situation and furthermore quitting would be awesome.", "summary": "I want to quit smoking, it's affecting my relationship as well as my health. Don't know how to do it."}
{"id": "t3_1llybj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[29M] with my long term GF [28F] of 3 years, both ambivalent about having children.", "post": "I [29M] have been in a relationship with my girlfriend [28F] for three years now, and we have been seriously discussing long-term (aka marriage) prospects. The good news is that both of us can see a future with one another in the long term, and that we have great communication.\n\nThe not-so-good news is that we are both ambivalent about children. It would be one thing if one of us wanted kids and the other didn't, but right now, both of us can't seem to come to a decision about kids. We have talked about it at length, and cannot come to some kind of final stance as to whether we want kids or not. \n\nIn some ways, we can picture ourselves as a family unit of two parents and one or two kids. That image doesn't make us retch or turn our head around. But then detracting issues pop up. One case is my medical condition. I have a brain tumor that is benign for now, but could act up statistically speaking, and that is a concern for both of us. \n\nCan this change or solidify if we finally get stable jobs? Right now, she is working as a contract teacher while I am in my last year of college. We both are going to get a master's degree, so according to our (ideal) timeframe, we see ourselves with the jobs we want in 3-4 years from now.", "summary": "Both GF and I cannot come to solid individual decisions over wanting kids or not. What can be done to achieve this?"}
{"id": "t3_49j5ee", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26M] with my exgf [26F] 1year, broke up 1 year ago, shes started hanging around my family members/cousins", "post": "I've done my ultimate best to try and move forward. The breakup was awful and centered around a terrible point in my life. Best mate died, Grandad died and she slept with a mate of mine during us getting together because she thought i was out of her league. The love was incredibly deep for both of us but the relationship was terribly difficult all the same. It resulted in all my so called \"friends\" siding with her and i was left completely on my own trying to rebuild my life.\n\nI did the dumb thing of chasing her for a few months but then dropped contact suddenly, removed her from faebook and got to the gym, slept with a few people. Just tried to forget really.\n\nRecently she's been turning up to events she knows i'll be at. She came and seen my brothers bands and now shes been tagged in pictures with a few of my girl cousins on big nights out. It's blowing my mind! We run into eachother again and sometimes will give a casual \"alright\" or \"hi\". But other than that don't talk. There was no contact at my brothers gig, but she kept hanging around his girlfriend and stuff.\n\nI put all this effort into getting myself together but i can't avoid her totally. What is she trying to do? I wish she's just **** off.", "summary": "Ex hanging around family members and cousins, started to see her more often again. It's winds me up and i don't know what it means or how to get away from it."}
{"id": "t3_3fko6o", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "Visiting Eastern China on a Budget", "post": "I'm an Australian setting out in a few weeks to backpack around Asia, starting in Japan and then flying to Hong Kong. I was intending to apply for a Chinese visa in Hong Kong and spend some time there however I'm on a shoestring budget (which is fine, I stay in hostels and eat street food regardless).\n\nI don't mind paying for the visa to get into China but I've noticed (because China is so massive) trains between many of the major cities cost ~$80 one way which is pretty steep for me. I only have 30 days so I feel there's plenty for me to do in China on the Eastern side, just wondering if anyone has any recommendations?\n\nI'd love to go up to Shanghai but that's the furthest up from Hong Kong I'd like to go, I've heard Yunnan is nice and I'm considering starting in HK, up to Shanghai, then work my way down to Yunnan and ultimately enter Laos at the end of my visa. Is this reasonable? Where is worth stopping at on the trip? And roughly how much should I expect to spend on a cheap as possible month in China if you don't mind me asking? (I budget usually around $40 AUD per day)", "summary": "Going to China from HK, too stingy to pay for trains everywhere, what's worth seeing in the south-east?"}
{"id": "t3_cybmr", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "How do I get my cat to stop waking me up for more food?", "post": "crosspost from askreddit\n\nHe's not underfed. The vet says that he needs to lose weight to be healthy, but he will meow loudly (above the volume earplugs will shut out) every night about two hours after I go to bed so I'll give him more food. I know it's counterproductive to give into him, but this cat has me beat. I can't afford to spend several sleepless nights in a row just to teach him a lesson; I have to be functional at work as well.\n\nThe only other thing that shuts him up is putting his food in a puzzle box, but he figures them out very quickly. I need new puzzle box ideas. He can easily get his food out of a box that is only one inch wide and twelve inches deep, can get it out of compartment toys, and is not challenged by food-dispensing balls at all.", "summary": "My cat is depriving me of sleep and I need new ideas for puzzle boxes. Also, he gets plenty of attention/playtime during the day, so that's not his issue either."}
{"id": "t3_2x4ij6", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "[Europe] I have little to no savings and no idea how to plan my expenses", "post": "My problem:\n\n- European, 21/M\n\n- Moved abroad to study in my girlfriend's country (I met my girlfriend online)\n\n- I have a bank account with almost no savings\n\n- I've been looking for a job for the past months (since I've moved) and I started working 10 to 20 hours weekly as a part time waiter, for around 300 euros/month since this month\n\n- My parents decided to give me 250 euros/month to help me with expenses since I've started working\n\n- I already saved enough to pay this year's university (800 euros)\n\nMy hobbies are all computer related, and I would like to invest some money in it to buy a new monitor for around 150 euros (at the moment I have a 15 years old monitor). The computer hobbies don't bring in any money (music production, web design) but help me keep my days full until I will find a full time job.\n\nMy girlfriend's parents are letting me sleep at their house/feeding me for free, but I would like to contribute even if they don't ask anything back from me (100-200 euros/month?).\n\nAlso, my girlfriend complains that I don't spend money for her. Any ideas for cheap/DIY presents to make her happy?", "summary": "I have 400 euros in my bank account and I would like to have some help on how to save money for the future."}
{"id": "t3_52j7r9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [19F] bf [19M] is driving me crazy for seemingly unimportant reasons. Not sure if it's worth it", "post": "Throwaway for obvious reasons\n\nSo my boyfriend and I have been dating for about 6 months now (neither of us can remember when we actually started dating lol). We've had a pretty good relationship, with my anxiety it's sometimes hard for me to relax which interferes but things have gotten better as I've gotten to know him and have started opening up.\n\nHowever, there are little things that he does that imply that he doesn't want to see me even though he says he does, and that he doesn't really care much about my problems although, again, he says he does. A few examples:\n\n- I can't see him this week due to him being busy. He said last week that he'd try to see me whenever he has the opportunity. An opportunity came up today, but he's playing Overwatch instead (games he plays show up on discord) and hasn't shown any interest in wanting to see me\n\n- My friend stood me up today and I was kinda pissed because it's not the first time, I told him about this, he said \"interesting\" and \"are you ok?\" and that was that. He changed the topic pretty quickly\n\n- A while back I was pretty upset about my grandpa's passing. I told him, he did the same \"oh no are you ok\" spiel and then changed the topic. I was upset about this and confronted him later on, he just said \"I thought you needed space, sorry\" and that was that. He repeats the same behaviour.\n\nI just don't know what to do. Other than little things like this, our relationship is great and I know he loves me. He is generally quite giving and sweet etc etc blah blah. I'm just not sure if I should keep holding on when he frustrates me so much.", "summary": "boyfriend drives me crazy, implies that he doesn't care to see me when he can, doesn't like to listen to my problems. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_4gffmh", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Being a Jack of all Trades", "post": "Kind of sucks. In spite of my desire to do so, I find it really difficult to sit down and really put all my effort into one thing -- maybe due to boredom, laziness, or short attention span. For example, I've been playing guitar for about 8 years. I'm good, I know I'm good. But I'm not NEARLY as good as I should be after 8 years. And its because I never truly dedicated myself to it. Even though I love it, I never had the ability to say \"fuck school/work/friends, I'm just gonna sit and practice guitar for 2-3 hours per day\". Maybe it's unrealistic to think that a college student can consistently fit that into their schedule. Maybe it's just the personality I was born with. \n\nAnyway,", "summary": "I don't do anything exceptionally well and that's kind of a bummer. I would rather be a master of one then a Jack of all trades."}
{"id": "t3_uj3kw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I need to stop acting Jealous.  I've had a rough past.  Can I get some advice?", "post": "I am 23M and She's 20F\n\nOk so I have been dating this wonderful girl now for the past month,  we seem to click very well and have only had 1 minor argument that only lasted like 1 hour.  today I did something kind of dumb.  She told me she would be going on vacation for a week in the summer to a different country with a friend.  I asked who it was, and because she wouldn't tell me right away I asked if it was a guy.  (I asked it because I know she has a lot of guy friends, she then told me it wasn't a guy)\n\nStupid me.  I know.\n\nshe's at work and I sent her a text saying I was sorry and that sometimes I let my past step into my present and it wouldn't happen again. (due to the nature of her job she cannot text me back until shes on break)\n\nI am just going to say I was in a very serious relationship 2 years ago, where I was cheated on (was with that girl for 3 years and was engaged).  Because of what it did to me it took me a couple years to even feel the want to get into another relationship.  I have told this girl about my past and how I was treated badly.  I was never like this until I was cheated on, now I seem to want to question everything.  I feel this is partly why I may be coming off a bit jealous.\n\nDoes anyone have any advice on what I should do?  Should I just bite the bullet when I feel like its effecting me where I just want to question everything?\n\nThanks Reddit!", "summary": "May have come off in a jealous way towards my girlfriend, think it would be because i was cheated on.  asking advice."}
{"id": "t3_xhrk0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So today I found out something about my past relationship that changed my entire view of it. Have any other Redditors found/pieced together information about a past relationship that completely changed your view of it?", "post": "So today I finally pieced together the reasons for why my past relationship broke down.\n\nAt first I thought it was because of something I did(or didn't do) and I was beating myself senseless right after the break-up trying to find out what I did wrong and fix it (purely as a self-improvement thing). \n\nWell today I was looking through my chat logs(an old habit) and realized that the warning signs were sown long ago. \n \nI.) Several messages at odd times of the Night of her asking if I will get angry if she hugged her Ex. (Future note: receiving this message should have clued me in, but I was so infatuated at the time I didn't really put too much weight on it.\n\nII.)Frequent Movie visits to movies I had invited her to watch with her \"Brother\", and several visits with her \"girlfriends\" towards the end of the relationship. Which she flat out denied me from even visiting after (for lunch, FroYo and the like)\n\nIII.) Limiting eye contact and constant denial and (soft) refusal to spend time. Tons of excuses such as \"needing to take care of the nephews\", and having a family movie night... EVERY SINGLE TIME I planned something for us to do. To the point that she can't even reserve a weekend for us 4 weeks in advance(Vegas Trip).\n\nIV.)Finding from one of her friends that she was infatuated with her Ex-BF for a year after the breakup, which ended around the same time I start dating her.\n\nI used to feel like I was in the wrong. As if the whole blowout were due to my faults... as if I said something or did something so incredibly bad as to change someone's opinion of me overnight.... but today's revelations taught me that no matter how smart a girl is... she doesn't necessarily know what the hell she wants half the time.", "summary": "TIL my ex-gf was simply using me as a temporary distraction from her woes and seemed to have only hooked up with me so she wouldn't feel left out come Valentines Day. "}
{"id": "t3_14yz7r", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I [22 F] have come to the realization that I am going to be alone for the rest of my life. Any advice on how to be happy with that?", "post": "*I'm not really sure if this belongs here, because its more about anti-dating (so to speak), so if I should put it somewhere else please just let me know!*\n\nI've never been kissed, been asked out, had sex, in a relationship, etc. I've been through college and am almost done with grad school, live in a city, have a large social circle, have a job, and am constantly doing fun things and yet I've never met anyone who's been remotely interested in me romantically.\n\nI'm assuming that I give off bad vibes that people find unappealing from a romantic standpoint. Additionally I know that I'm extremely unattractive (or so I've been told), which I'm sure doesn't help anything. I have a pretty strong feeling that I'm never going to be loved romantically, and I'm tired of being miserable about it. \n\n**So, does anyone have any advice on how to accept that you're going to be \"forever alone\"? And, furthermore, does anyone have advice on how to be happy and content with that knowledge?** \n\nI should mention that I don't have *any* single friends, which means relationships are a constant part of my social interactions (which is totally fine because I adore all of my friends' significant others, but hard because it reminds me that I'll probably never have that). This makes it even more important to me that I be happy knowing I'll be alone - I don't want to be that bitter, single friend.\n\nAny advice?", "summary": "I'm beginning to understand that I'm going to be \"forever alone,\" and need advice on how to be happy with that."}
{"id": "t3_15g8po", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I thought I was obvious, Reddit what do you think?", "post": "Hey, here is a brief summary of our current situation. So I have been friends with this girl for almost a year. This semester (I am in 3rd year university) I haven't been able to get her off my mind. She has had an on and off relationship, but still I am the guy she turns to on a regular basis. I buy her drinks, food (when we go out in a group), walk her home, ect. My friends all see that I like her, and they like hanging out with here (which is a major thing her on and off guy's friends don't). Recently, I have been more forward especially since she is ~= off with the other guy. I sent this message and got this reply. It went better than I expected. Reddit, am I still friendzoned, or do you think she knows I was asking her out?", "summary": "Like this girl, have possibly been friendzoned but my friends see that we have a connection despite her on and off bf. Was I forward in asking her out and does she know?"}
{"id": "t3_2ibbxm", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By venting my anger", "post": "So I am currently a junior in college, living off campus for the first time with 2 of my mates. A few weeks ago, one of my housemates used a baking pan of mine. He waited 2 or 3 days to wash it and it stained the pan. Yesterday, he's heating up a frozen pizza on it and cuts it was what seems to be a butcher knife. He left 2 massive gauges in it. It really pissed me off but I went to my other buddies first to tell them about it. I told them what was wrong and asked if I was overreacting. They said I kinda was (I don't really think I was). I decided not to tell him about it because, it's a pan, whatever. Fast forward to today, he comes into my room with a new pan and angrily says to me \"I went and bought you a new pan because apparently ones with scratches in 'em don't work anymore.\" Then he huffs and walks out. It's not even the pan that I'm mad about necessarily, it's that he treat my stuff like crap. That's what really pisses me off. Because I know if I treated his stuff like that, he'd be just as pissed as I am. I'm also pissed that my friends girlfriend decided to tell him about me being pissed off. But I'm not even going to say anything to her because apparently expressing my feelings is wrong...", "summary": "Housemate fucked up baking pan. I got pissed. Told my friends. He finds out. Buys new pan and now hates me."}
{"id": "t3_1gt3p3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How to help my gf with her hatred toward her ex? It's negatively affecting our relationship.", "post": "So we've been dating for about 8 months. For the most part, everything is great. We communicate well with each other. We are open. Our sex life is good. I love her and she makes me happy. \n\nHowever, before we were dating, she was in a relationship that ended badly. Out of the blue, her boyfriend became an asshole and dumped her. Less than a week later he was dating another girl. The timing was not a coincidence. That relationship was her first real relationship and it had a big impact on her. \n\nThe breakup was terrible for her and he never apologized or said anything besides \"we are breaking up\". She's had no closure. But we all sometimes see each other through mutual friends and it spurs up the hatred she has for him even more. \n\nShe has told me that she still has a lot of hatred for both her ex and the girl he is currently with. She wants him to regret and suffer for what he did to her. To want her back, but know that he can't because she loves me now. She feels bad that she's not over it by now. She wants to focus on us but its hard sometimes and she sells up with hate. \n\nI've told her that its a reality that he may never apologize, and that she shouldn't take his not apologizing as anything bad about herself or her relationship with me now. \n\nHow can I help her cope with it if she is realistically not going to receive any closure from him? She feels that it's a problem interfering with her relationship with me now, and she wishes she wasn't filled with this hate. I'm interesting to hear your guys' thoughts on this. Thank you.", "summary": "My girlfriend had a bad breakup. Still hates ex. Her hatred is getting in the way of our current relationship. How can I help her?"}
{"id": "t3_1rq6fv", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Neighbor's cat wishes she was my cat- Is there an appropriate course of action here?", "post": "I have a cat named Link. He's nearly four and we adopted him nearly a year ago. The neighbor's got a cat about 6 months ago that we call \"Gray Kitty.\"\n\nGray Kitty really like Link. I mean, some mornings when I let him out, she's already waiting for him and she's frequently with him when he wants to come in. She seems to like him more than he does her, but he's a really mellow cat and there's clearly no animosity there. Gray Kitty is extremely affectionate and I find her hanging out on our back porch a lot or coming to greet me when I get home. Being the cat-loving human I am, I frequently give her a few pats before going in. \n\nThe problem is that Gray Kitty has gotten into our house like a dozen times now. Any time the door is open, she's in, bolting towards the food. It doesn't help that our back door will swing open if it's not deadbolted and we won't notice. The other day, we looked down and she was under the coffee table, just strolled right in. \n\nI know that she belongs to our neighbors and she appears well-fed, just starved for attention. She also had some matting in her fur that I brushed/cut out to the best of my abilities. I think her owners feed her, but I don't know how loved she is. Whenever she gets in, we typically let her stay for a minute or two and then toss her out again. I would kind of want to kidnap her because she really is a sweetheart, but I know her owners and I'm not a catnapper. I mean, she purred the entire time I was brushing her. My cat acts like I'm torturing him and gets wary as soon as he sees the brush.", "summary": "Neighbor's cat wants me to adopt her. I'm a cat lover, but not a cat thief. Is there a certain course of action I'm supposed to follow here?"}
{"id": "t3_23f5gk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] looking for advice to let go of my fiance [24 F] after 8 years of being together.", "post": "Hello, I am seeking for advice, or basically anything on what to do. My fiance was having a 'serious' long relationship with some other guy she has never met from  Switzerland. We been together since highschool and everything has always been good, or that's what I thought. I discovered this other relationship by accident and since then we been fighthing for three straight months. She is going to visit him by the end of the month and she is completely 'decided' on that. I don't know what happened. We spend new years together. I live two hours from her and I try to visit her and she tries to visit me. We talked every day and skyped but she has this infatuation and she actually believes everything the guy tells him. I'm completely lost, I ask her to talk to me but she just hangs up or threatens me.", "summary": "my fiance has a relationship with someone she has never met and is going to visit him and throw away our almost 9 years of being together."}
{"id": "t3_2osnz3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to save a squirrel", "post": "I was driving home after work today when I see this squirrel being attacked by these two small bitch dogs.  I pulled my car to the side and tried to chase the unattended dogs away.  When I walked over to the dogs and the squirrel, the dogs didn't move, so I had to yell at them to get away.  I am standing in a stranger's yard yelling \"Bad dogs! No! Get out of here!\"\n\nAfter the dogs ran off, I walked back to my car, just as it started to rain.  As soon as I reached my car, one of the dogs ran back over and shook the squirrel to send it flying.  I ran back over to yell some more.  By this point, the neighbors have come out side to stare at me.  I am getting drenched in my business clothes as I yell at the little bitch dog.\n\nThe dog ran off again, and as it did, the neighbors (not the ones who owned the dogs\u2026 They were never seen) asked what I was doing.  I told them that I was a huge animal lover and can't stand to see an animal in pain.  I then told them that I would be back with a net to relocate the injured squirrel to a new location, away from the little terrors. \n\nAfter getting a net and a bucket, I went back over to scoop up the squirrel.  I feel pretty crazy at this point.  I am drenched in business clothes, chasing a squirrel who is too weak to climb a tree, but fast enough to get away from me.  I eventually catch him and release him down the road into a big tree, where I am sure he will eventually die.  I am soaking wet, but feel like I did my best \u2013 and on a second thought, I am going to bring some dog food to put by the tree, just in case he is hungry.", "summary": "I yelled at a stranger's dogs because they were tormenting a squirrel that isn't going to make it anyways, in the rain, as the neighbors watched."}
{"id": "t3_tc5we", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Getting Over Her", "post": "So, stuff like this pops up around reddit all of the time. I have seen it with my own eyes, but I want to get this off of my chest.\n\nI was dating this girl for awhile, about a year and a month or two. We met freshman year of uni basically when I moved in and a month later we were going out. Because of this all of my friends are awkwardly her friends. Either way, when we \"broke up,\" but it was a soft break... I kissed her goodbye before I got on my train home from uni for winter break and she went home and is away this semester for an internship. \n\nThis semester has been hard because I tried talking to her online, not realizing that we were actually broken up for sure (not just breaking because of distance). At the same time she dumps more reasons on me as to why we have broken up. Throughout this I got aggravated, because she was not upfront when we broke up. So after telling me she needs sometime to find herself and be single (100% no ties to me). She gets an OkCupid and is now going out with a guy long distance at another uni in my area (Northeastern). Which completely contradicts the reasons she gave me for breaking up, besides the ones which point to me being a bad person.\n\nThis girl was always a little odd I suppose, but I really loved her. She broke up with me a month after we started dating, but I somehow won her back. She sticks with guys traditionally, but also is a little flighty and doesn't make solid decisions, ever (changed majors every semester or more)...\n\nIt has been 4 months, I am still not 100% over her and she is coming back to the area for the summer (I am staying in the city this summer). I am worried about my old friends, my new friends (which she feels she has claim to) and just my happiness in general. I still love this girl a little, but I mostly just want to move on. I want to see new people get more experience.", "summary": "Me and a girl broke a few months ago. I am not 100% over it, but I want to be."}
{"id": "t3_wnbxq", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I dont know how to handle this situation.", "post": "I'm a 23 year old female who just ended things with a previous rebound relationship (22m) that lasted about 7 months. A few days after I had finally made the decision to end things, a friend of mine confessed his feelings for me. We will call this friend John (27) . I met John around the same time I started dating the rebounder. We hit it off as friends. I rarely ever saw him, but we would talk here and there. I should also probably mention that John has a girlfriend. When John told me of his feelings, I admitted to my mutual feelings for him. I asked if we could talk about it, and he refused. I saw him this past weekend, and he kissed me. I was extremely intoxicated. This happened multiple times over the course of the night. He even came into bed with me where things continued. I ended things with the rebounder the next day, and John left to talk to his girlfriend. I dont expect him to end things with her, I even told him that. I know that I need to be single right now, and collect my thoughts. I just can't help that thinking that hes everything I've needed and wanted for a long time, and I don't know how to handle this. I know I have to back away and let them work their relationship out, but a part of me wants this.. Reddit, I should just walk away right?", "summary": "Hooked up with friend who has a girlfriend, while still being in a rebound relationship. I don't know how to handle the aftermath."}
{"id": "t3_mcc5p", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "New to dating. What's considered appropriate intimacy for dates?", "post": "Early 20s M. \n\nObviously, this answer dependent on the people and situations involved, but...what's considered a typical level of intimacy for dates? \n\nBackstory for why I'm even asking:\n\nAll my past relationships I've kind of...stumbled into somehow or another. Hard to explain..um...I guess what I mean is I've never just cold asked someone out and did the whole \"formal\" dating thing. It's always been friends straight into lovers and whatnot. \n\nI met a cute girl through a friend recently, she's interesting and we get along pretty great so I asked her out on a date. It was a pretty informal thing, we just went to a show together. Anyhoo. I had fun, and I know she did too. We danced (near each other, not with each other *awk me*), talked a lot, shared some laughs, and generally got to know each other. Peachy. So when I dropped her off, the awkward hit like a sack of bricks in the face. I suddenly got nerved up and I think I came across as just...completely uninterested. So parting ways I think I said something ambiguous and unromantic like \"See you around\". There was this instant wipe of disappointment and then she said \"Can I at least get a hug?\" and I happily obliged but...it kind of threw off my entire view of the night. I mean I am so afraid of being too fast or rushing into anything...but of course I wouldn't mind something a little more romantic myself. Now I'm just wondering what people expect out of these formal dates. What's the norm? I feel like I really let down her expectations or something, and I feel like a dick. I'm going to call her of course and try to go on another, but I don't want to have this happen again.", "summary": "New to dating. What do most people expect going into this? What's typical? How do I politely escalate from dating? Merp."}
{"id": "t3_3leua3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17M] agreed to go on a date with a crazy stalker girl[17F], now she has told her friends and some of my friends that we were together and I left her after we engaged in intercourse.", "post": "So I meet this girl that had a huge crush on me. She wouldn't leave me alone, like she would draw picture of me and send them to me over facebook, at my graduation ceremony from school she ran up and hugged me and wouldn't let me go until I went berserk and told her to get off me. Our friend circles blended over a little and I felt quite bad for blowing my lid at her at my graduation cause it might've been kinda embarrassing since she was in the grade below me, and she asked me to go out on a date with her and if I don't enjoy it I'll never have to deal with her again. \n\nSo I went on this date with her, didn't enjoy it mainly cause she just sat there in silence. So it was time for me to drive her back home, she gets in and starts striping down and I told her I'm really not in the mood and she eventually started putting her clothes back on. She kept up her side of the promise and I never had to deal with her again. \n\nDuring my mid-semester break I met up with another girl that was pretty cool, we kept in contact while I was at uni. Now this girl met the crazy one and asked me what happened with this other girl cause she said \"We [plzhelpme121] dated for a while and then when we got to have sex and then I left her\". \n\nNow that my mid-semester break is coming up soon I wanted to see if I could pursue something with the sane girl, which I have explained myself to and I don't know what to do and don't feel like dealing with this shit atm.", "summary": "Agreed to go out on a date with a girl, find out that she told a bunch of people we were together and I left her after we had sex and then left her cause that's all I wanted."}
{"id": "t3_2z1nh7", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by letting my mom entering a mosque.", "post": "Today, i fucked up really hard.\n\nIt all started this morning while I was scrolling down my Instagram. I noticed someone that did this weird thing with his hair and i actually really liked it. And since I'm 16 I taught it'd be a good idea to ask my parents before i get a new haircut, and so I asked.\n\nIt turned out that the haircut was 'inappropriate' for a 'handsome young man' like me.. And that the haircut was for criminals and football players. And yes, my parents are very Catholic. After i continued arguing and saying that you can't say if someone is a 'bad guy' just by his hairstyle, my dad got really mad and told my mom that i needed a haircut right now.\n\nSo my mom took me downtown and right in to the first barber shop we saw. And there all my hair got cut off. Since I am black i don't actually mind because it will grow back within some weeks. But deep down I still was freaking mad. While we were walking back to our car my mom saw a cute second hand shoe vendor and asked me if I wanted to take a look. First i couldn't really care but after taking a second look at the store I saw a medium size blue sign which read: Mosque' or something like that. I looked in my mom's eyes and saw she hadn't read that sign. So I just played along and said that I didn't feel very well but that I wouldn't mind if she went to take a look. And so she did.\n\nAfter not even a minute there were already 2people escorting her of the mosque and telling her that she should read better and some other things that i couldn't understand.", "summary": "I was mad at my mom for forcing me to get a haircut. So I let her go in to a mosque while she thought it was a shoe store."}
{"id": "t3_4jhrnv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18 M] just want to confess to her [18 F] but just need a push", "post": "(Throwaway because she uses Reddit as well)\n\nI have been crushing on a girl, we'll call her Amy, for a while now. Amy and I met while participating in the same school club over a year ago, and started getting closer a few months.\n\nAt first I didn't think much about Amy, but after we started meeting up outside of club activities, I started to develop feelings for Amy. I never really thought it would happen (because I never thought Amy would be my type) but it happened. I guess the heart knows best.\n\nA few weeks ago while Amy and I were out drinking, she came back to my place and spent the night. We didn't do anything besides hold hands the whole way back (because it would be wrong since we were drinking)\n\nThe school club is very important to the both of us, and I don't want to ruin that for us, however I feel like if I don't tell her how I feel, I will regret it for an extremely long time. Is it greedy for me to confess?\n\nI guess what I'm looking for is just some advice, inspiration, a push, or just guidance on this, I really care about her and like her. Thank you!", "summary": "Got close to a girl in the same school club, started liking her, don't want to ruin club-relationship, but feel the need to confess."}
{"id": "t3_2xocb9", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Children were screaming outside when I was trying to sleep, but not for long.", "post": "Sorry for any grammatical errors, etc. Typed this on my tablet.\n\nI work at a bakery and have to get up really early in the morning, so I try to be asleep around 8:30 or 9. These kids have been giving my family trouble for a while, so I already dislike them. \n\nAnywho, it was a Friday night and I was dozing off a little later than normal, around 10ish. Then all of a sudden I hear screaming outside my window (I keep it open because the fresh air relieves my asthma a bit) and after 15 minutes of hoping it will stop, I get up to investigate. \n\nI look outside and see about 10 kids around 9-12 years old running around the cul-de-sac chasing each other. All over the cul-de-sac, around my car, in our garden (destroying our flowers), etc. I don't care if they want to play outside at 10 in the evening, but why do they have to scream at the top of their lungs and run through the garden and destroy things? \n\nI head downstairs out of anger (because after closing the window, I can still hear them loud and clear) and get some water when I have an idea. I grab my car keys and wait. One of the kids decides to run behind my car and another tries to catch him and bangs into my car. So I hit the panic button and watch them scatter. This happens one more time and finally they shut up and go inside and I get to finally go to sleep. \n\nIt was so satisfying.", "summary": "Kids were keeping me awake by screaming while they were running in the garden destroying things, so I hit the panic button on my car to scare them off."}
{"id": "t3_19o7yi", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "My boyfriend's mom is having the worst day.", "post": "This morning, she and her boyfriend broke up. We've been here with her doing normal breakup things -- eating a lot, watching trashy TV, etc. -- when she suddenly asks my bf where her other TV is.\n\nHe goes...Huh, I don't think I've seen it.\n\nGo back a few months, she was letting some of her other son's friends stay at the house because they had nowhere else to go. They all have criminal records, mostly for theft. The TV was here...until they all left (when my bf's brother got locked up, so it didn't make sense for them to stay anymore).\n\nShe's going absolutely crazy now, ransacking the place as if the TV's going to be in a drawer or something. :/ She's also drunk, which isn't helping things much. I feel so bad...", "summary": "Some kids who were staying at my bf's mom's house *probably* stole her TV and she found out on the worst possible day."}
{"id": "t3_4az12x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27M] was told by her [30F] that she doesn't know if she 'likes me' or 'likes me as a friend'", "post": "I met a woman a few weeks ago and we've been on three dates. In my eyes, all three went pretty well and I was getting good vibes from her. She was a bit delayed when responding to texts, but I tried not to think about that too much. \n\nFast forward to yesterday's third date. We meet at a bar and have a few drinks. Everything is going well and we decide to part ways. I ask her something like \"so hey, would you like to get together sometime next week?\" She looks at me and says \"look, I like you, but I can't tell if I just like you as a friend or if I actually like you. I'll text you.\"\n\nI basically said if she's not feelin it, she's not feeling it. I told her that I did enjoy her company and I wanted to see her again. She thanked me. Now I understand I probably got let down the easy way, which is fine, but normally I'd just move on to the next relationship and not look back... But there's something about her that I like I don't want to give up on so easily.\n\nIf I don't hear back from her within a few days, is it acceptable for me to text her something like \"look, I know you're unsure about your feelings but I just want to make it clear that I like you and I want to see you again. I'm not looking for a friendship.\"? Or should I wait it out and only text her back once she's texts me (if that actually happens)?\n\nI know this is a lame post, but I've never been in a situation like this before :-/", "summary": "after the third date, I was told \"I don't know if I like you or if I just like you as a friend. I'll text you.\" I need some advice on the next step."}
{"id": "t3_148h7l", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Would you really do it?", "post": "Would any of you really go back and kill Hitler? All you have is a one way ticket, in the form of a time machine, back to the date and a weapon. You'd have to pick a date before his rise, because even if you could get through his supporters and guards and kill him you would just be making him a martyr. In my mind, you would have to do it earlier before he was a public figure, but then, in history's eyes, you would just be killing an innocent man and you would be nothing more than a murderer. Would you sacrifice your life, whether it be to imprisonment, death penalty, or in pursuit of the death of Hitler, if you could?\n\nThis applies to basically any dictator, villain, tyrant, or even just a person you really don't like, but I choose Hitler because of a comic I read about it.", "summary": "Would you really kill Hitler? Think about it, think hard. Would you really risk or even sacrifice your life to kill him (or any other tyrant)?"}
{"id": "t3_12i7p5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I (F/22) stop projecting my fears from a past abusive relationship (M/23) in my current relationship (M/22)?", "post": "My last relationship (4 years) was really bad. My ex-boyfriend (M/23) verbally abused me, cheated on me, and took a huge toll on my confidence.\n\nI'm (F/22) in a really great relationship now (7 months) with a new guy (M/22) who treats me so well! I truly do love him and I'm so happy :) But sometimes I still have that fear inside that this is too good to be true and that he will cheat on me or hurt my heart like the last guy did (I know there will never be a guarantee that a SO won't hurt me/cheat on me in a relationship).\n\nI think it is unfair that I worry about things like this with my new bf since he hasn't given me a reason to worry. It's just hard to not worry about being hurt again after my confidence level was severely dropped by my last bf.\nWhat can I do to get over the pain from the last relationship so that I can be confident in myself and my new relationship?\n\nNOTE: I would love opinions of people who have been through what I have! I think this situation is more than just a relationship thing. It's about gaining more confidence, moving on from past pain, and learning to trust again. Just need some advice on how to move forward please! I really appreciate it :)", "summary": "I was in a past abusive relationship which took a huge toll on my confidence and trust in people. What can I do to quit worrying about these things in my new relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_1fht89", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (21 F) left a drunk voice mail to my boyfriend (21 M). He got mad and broke up with me.", "post": "Last night, I got together with friends to have a cooking night and we all had a bit too much to drink. Drunk me thought it would be a good idea to send a lovely voice mail to my boyfriend of six months who is currently in France for vacation. Here's where my story and my (ex) boyfriend separate. When I left my voice mail, I remember saying that I wished he was here with me, that he sucked for being in France and that eating bacon weaves and potato scallops were a lot better than him. I also remember clearly saying that I loved him and goodbye. Today, however, I texted him saying that my voice mail was probably really weird, so don't listen to it. He seemed angry, so I asked him what was wrong. Apparently, in my voice mail, I got really hypocritical with him and said that the things he did were stupid and that he was dumb. I asked him what I said, but he refuses to tell me the exact thing. A friend of mine at the party, who was sober, was in the kitchen with me  and said that I never said anything horrible to him. I'm not sure what to believe because I can't really remember everything that happened, but at the same time I truly believe that I never said anything horrible enough to get broken up with. I apologized for whatever I said that hurt him, but all he said was that he could have forgiven me, but knowing that I was drunk made it worse. His last words to me were, \"Yeah, drinking is a bitch, right?\". I don't drink often, and I only do when it's a celebration, like a big get-together with old friends. Help :(", "summary": "Left a drunk voice mail to my boyfriend, boyfriend gets very angry and breaks up with me for things I don't think I said. "}
{"id": "t3_2ksqs0", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Worth it applying for financial assistance for medical bills?", "post": "My wife and I have about $2,700 in medical bills (after insurance) for having a baby.  \n\nI recently applied for a new credit card that has a 15-month zero interest period specifically to handle these expenses, so if need be I can pay this and pay down the debt prior to the 15 months expiring.\n\nHere are the other facts to my situation:\n\n1. Only I work, and I make $80k annually.\n2.  We have 3 children total.\n3. Other significant debt is my wife's van that we owe about $11k on and student loans of about $26k.\n4. We live in the state of Maryland.\n5. We have about $2,500 in liquid cash.\n6. We have about $2,500 in current credit card debt (not accruing interest as it is on another 0% credit card good for another 4 months).\n\nI already called the hospital asking for a discount if I paid the balance in full but they said they don't do that.  They offered their own 12-month repayment plan.", "summary": "Just wondering if it's worth going through the hassle of applying for financial assistance or if I likely have no shot of qualifying and should just pay the bill and be done with it?"}
{"id": "t3_2u87ts", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with girl I've just started dating [23F] found out her previous relationships have been with women. What do I do?", "post": "Okay I know this is going to be one of the dumbest questions you have probably ever come across but I am kind of at a loss here because this is a first for me.\n\nA girl I have just started to see, I'll call her Amanda, has been really nice.  She is pretty, funny and somewhat nerdy (which I find attractive) and we have had fun on the couple of dates we have been on.  Now I am a slow mover to begin with so there has been no advancement by me (or her) for any type of physical relationship yet, this is fine with me I kind of like to get to know a person first.\n\nBut due to a quirk of fate I found out we have  a mutual friend, female, and she told me that she was shocked that Amanda was going out with me because the last she new she was gay.  At first I thought she was kidding but she was dead serious.\n\nNow I'm kind of stressing about things because I don't know the real story here.\n\nAre we just friends and she is hanging out with me as a friend?  If she is interested in me romantically where can this go?  I am deathly afraid of falling for her and spending 3-4 years of my life only for her to wake up one day and decide that she really misses women?  \n\nI know that last one is probably not logical but that is where my brain is.\n\nDo I ask her about this?  Is that rude?  Is it any of my business?  Will she be offended or think less of me if I ask?\n\nIf I don't ask do I just go on forever pretending like I don't know?\n\nThere are a thousand other questions I want to ask but that is a pretty irrational start.\n\nAny advice on this would be very appreciated.", "summary": "Found out woman I'm seeing is either gay or bi-sexual and I don't know what to do or if I should even do anything"}
{"id": "t3_kqw0f", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Service workers: is it alright for someone to ask for your number while you're working?", "post": "Last night I went to buy some gelato and the girl working there was gorgeous and incredibly nice. We made small talk for a bit and I had a hell of a time ordering because I was so caught up in her that I really didn't care what flavour I got. She seemed REALLY nice, but I couldn't tell if that was because she liked me too or if it was just how she deals with customers. She gave me a bunch of samples and it seemed that maybe she was trying to get me to stay in there longer. Either way I wound up walking out of there with a cone half the size of my head.\n\nI'm very shy but I STILL nearly asked for her number (I've never asked someone out before, any girl I've been with thus far has initiated things), but I left without saying anything. I even turned back after going about a block determined to ask but a family had come in while I was gone and she was busy with them so I grabbed an extra napkin and left again. I think I might make the trip back there next week at the same time to see if I can see her again. I don't know if I should though, she might just be a great saleswoman and I would be creating an awkward situation while she's working.", "summary": "Typical ramblings of love-sick boy, but the main question I have is: Should I ask for her # if I see her again? Or am I just falling for good salesmanship? "}
{"id": "t3_4x9tyx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by running into my garage door", "post": "This story actually happened a good few years ago. When I was younger my friends Shelby and Chris were over at my house. We were playing around, and acting a fool like normal barely teenage kids would do.\n\nWell at some point I go in the garage, and their standing outside at the garage door. We're laughing and making faces through the windows of the door when I decide to jokingly charge at it making a weird face and some strange silent hill level movements.\n\nBasically I stop too late, and end up hitting the garage door and the glass pane breaks with them outside. I get cut up a bit on my arms from the glass, and Shelby originally standing merrily outside is on the ground with a chunk of her skin cut off by a chunk of glass that shot out.", "summary": "Kids were being kids, I ran into a garage door, broke a small glass window, and now two kids are cut up and one is missing a chunk of skin."}
{"id": "t3_4rera9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by burning my neighbour's genetials", "post": "So this FU doesn't happened yesterday or the day after tomorrow.It happened six years ago when I was in the 7th grade.So it was diwali back then and in diwali we all play with a lot of fireworks.\nMy uncle Sam who was my next door neighbour brought a huge amount of rockets and crackers.My cousins started burning the lot.As I was quite small back then so I was not allowed to play with fireworks.So the naughty mode in me got ON.I took 3-4 rockets and went to our street and started burning them.Uncle Sam lives at the opposite side of our house.As I preparing to burn the biggest one my cousins came and saw me doing it.They all urge me not to burn it as I was inexperienced in handling them.But I ignore them and carry on with it.I put the rocket in an empty bottle (to hold) and light it up.I don't remember exactly what happened after that.But remembering now I think due to a strong breeze of air the rocket fell on the ground and it was about to blow up. We all were scared shitless to go and put it off.And as soon as I took a step it went on like the Flash and at the same time Uncle Sam opened his door and came outside.The rocked projectiled it way and landed on my Uncle's Tatas and it caught fire. And that moment was un-seen.He ran like lightening screaming My dick's on fire and somersaulted into the kid's pool.He got 2nd degree burn.\n\nI was grounded for a month.", "summary": "Trying to send a rocket on the moon.Landed on my uncle's tools and scarred him for life maybe."}
{"id": "t3_3b4dq9", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Retrieving old text messages...AT&T [MA]", "post": "I've never had the need nor desire to save old text messages.  Texts stay on my phone for 30 days, then cycle off.  It turns out that I may need some old messages (the past couple months) to bolster my case, if it comes to that.\n\nI figured that it would be simple to request access through AT&T (that my old texts would be stored somewhere should they need to be retrieved.) When I called, they said there was absolutely no way that I could receive texts I've sent/received if they are no longer stored on my phone.  They said no matter if there was or wasn't a subpoena, this is simply not possible to recover.\n\nIs this accurate?! I feel as though I've read about court cases/situations where old phone records and old texts are recovered through the phone provider.  I didn't receive (or send) any damning texts, hence the reason for not saving.  If anything, the texts recovered would show that the other party is lying about past conversations.  Help?!", "summary": "is there a way for me to recover old text messages (past couple months) to/from my cell? Provider is AT&T"}
{"id": "t3_1yx6ot", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 M] with my wife [28 F] of two years wants to get a sperm donor so we can have \"attractive\" babies", "post": "My wife and I have been together for 5 years, married for 2. I always thought everything about the relationship has been great. We had always talked about having kids one day and I just assumed that meant they would be biologically mine. Within the past few weeks, we both decided that we are ready.\n\nBut my wife has now indicated that we should get a sperm donor. There is nothing wrong with my sperm (as far as I know). When I asked her why she mentioned a few medical hereditary traits she wouldn't want passed on (cancer, diabetes, and mental illness runs in my family). But as I continued to press her, I found out the real reason: she doesn't think our kids would be attractive enough with my genes.\n\nHonestly, I'm a little dazed. I think my wife is the most beautiful woman and to find out she doesn't feel the same is strange. I never questioned my appearance before. I consider myself average. But now I am confused.\n\nShould I consider having a donor? Is anyone has had a sperm donor, how did that affect the relationship with their child/wife?\n\nThanks Reddit.", "summary": "Wife doesn't think my genes are great and wants a sperm donor so we can have attractive babies and dodge some poor genetic traits. Should I consider this?"}
{"id": "t3_3cu2zp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm 25/f, and I always chase after commitment phobics. I don't know where to turn now.", "post": "I don't know how to explain this. I'm not good at writing, but I wanted to try and get my feelings across. \n\nI'm angry at myself. I have always chased after non-commitment phobics. Always. I have no idea why, and it's starting to wear me down. I feel frustrated. I feel sad. But most of all, I feel so pathetic. I'm 25 years old, and can't seem to find a proper relationship. \n\nAfter over a year I finally broke it off with a guy. He has always made it clear he didn't want a relationship (his reason... 'I don't want one because everyone else does it?'). He still wanted to see me when I broke it off... I'm just not good enough for a relationship. It sound so stupid, I'm sorry if it does, but I don't think I'll ever be good enough for anyone now. I honestly believe I'll end up lonely and pissed off at men, living with dogs in my house (I prefer dogs to cats... Sorry, Reddit!)\n\nThe thing is, I think when somebody tells me they don't want a relationship... I think I see it as a challenge. I think to myself, \"I can change his mind, I might be good enough for him.\" I then become frustrated with him, and he can't understand why.\n\nI don't know what to do. I'm sick and tired of being stuck in the same relationship pattern. I just want to be with someone who is proud to be with me. Who wants to take me out all the time, do fun things together and most of all... wants to be with me. I just can't keep doing this to myself any more. I don't even know where I'm going wrong for me to end up like this. I don't want a boyfriend now... I just want to know why I'm like this.", "summary": "I can't find a boyfriend who will 'commit'. I feel like I'm stuck in a dead end... How do I date 'normal' guys"}
{"id": "t3_3jkwev", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [21/f] suspect my boyfriend [25/m] is lying to me about how well he is doing in school. Would you leave your SO just because of poor academics?", "post": "I have been dating my SO for a year and a half now. He is the sweetest guy and we have much in common. \n\nI am almost done with my UG degree. He took a two year break from college so he is a little behind. But I think he is not doing as well as he claims because he is very vague about his classes. I think he feels insecure because I am almost done with school and when he was on academic probation before we got into a HUGE argument about it. I feel like if he does not get a degree we can't have a secure future together. \n\nI feel awful for thinking that way. Am I being a total a$$ about this? What should I do?", "summary": "I [21/f] suspect my boyfriend [25/m] is lying to me about how well he is doing in school. I don't know how to confront him about it."}
{"id": "t3_3q6gng", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by calling my parents during sex (NSFW).", "post": "This happened on Friday. I went to my Dom's house for some fun. Usually, he gives me very clear instructions to follow, undress, get on your knees, etc. but that day, my own inner dom wanted to get out to play. So I ignored him and started teasing him, tickling him, etc. Of course I knew I would be \"punished\" for my insolence and sure enough, after 30 seconds or so, he grabbed me around my neck, threw me on the bed, pulled my pants down just far enough to expose my ass, shoved his dick in and started hate-fucking me (it was awesome).\n\nNow, you've all read the title to this \"TIFU\" so I'm sure you can all see where this is heading. My phone has recently picked up this habit of redialing my last call when I put it in my pants. In this case, it was my parents and it seems having my pants pulled down and being hate-fucked was enough to get it to redial them...Of course I only found this out when I checked my messages on my way home and had one from mom. She's \"not sure what stunt [I'm] trying to pull\" but she's \"incredibly disappointed and disgusted with [me] and not at all impressed\". No idea if she's told dad or not...", "summary": "Accidentally pocket dialed parents while having really rough sex. Parents heard me moaning like a little bitch. Tonight's Sunday dinner should be fun..."}
{"id": "t3_4vb05z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21 F] boyfriend [24 M] of three months has taken a new job and can now only see me once a week, sometimes only once every two weeks", "post": "I'd like to begin by saying I don't want any answers that just say 'break up', I want some actual advice on the situation and how to make it work, without having to break up. I believe this issue can be fixed, I'd just like some ideas as to how...\n\nMy boyfriend and I have been together for around three months. We're genuinely happy in the relationship, except for one gaping problem that has arisen in the last month.\n\nHe's taken on a new job, one that requires him to work six days a week between 2pm and 8:30pm (sometimes starting a little earlier). This means we usually only have one day to meet up per week because I have uni most mornings, and the physically demanding nature of the job means he's usually too tired to do anything when he arrives home at night.\n\nIn fact, sometimes we only see each other once every two weeks, if he gets called into work on his day off, or if he makes plans to see his friends/family. \n\n(and before anyone says anything, i know for a fact that he's not seeing somebody else. i won't get into it here but we can rule that one out)\n\nI'm not gonna lie, I hate this. He hates it too. We love being around each other. We're generally really happy in our relationship, and at the risk of sounding needy, I'd spend every waking moment of every day with him if I could. But surely wanting to see your boyfriend more than once a week, or once every two weeks, is not too much to ask?! We're not a long-distance relationship, in fact we only live 10 minutes from each other, so we'd love to try and fix this.\n\nAny ideas?", "summary": "Boyfriend's work schedule means he can only see me once a week, sometimes only once every two weeks. We both hate it and we don't plan on breaking up, but he needs the money. Any ideas?"}
{"id": "t3_wu9qd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How could a friend turn out to be so mean and just ignore me?", "post": "I was never good at making friends, and I probably never will be. My parents knew that, so my mother decided I should meet the daughter from one of her friends.\u00a0\n\nShe was so nice to me. She invited me to her parties and her friends - even thought I didn't know them very well - were just as nice as she was. I had so much fun. But we saw each other less and less.\n\nI have to mention; I don't live in America but in the Netherlands. And here middle school and high school are one school; one \"middle school\", and you go there when you're around twelve.\n\nSo I didn't saw her in four years when I went to middle school. I was so surprised when I saw her, and decided to send her e-mails. We mailed a lot and I wanted to talk to her in school. Before I could finish my sentence, she mumbled uninterested \"yeah..\" and never spoke or mailed to me again. She didn't even looked me in the eye anymore. Why? Why the fuck?\u00a0This frustrated me to this day. Maybe she didn't wanted to be friends with me because she was one grade higher. Or maybe because she's super beautiful, skinny and tall and I'm ugly, \u00a0plump and short. Or maybe because my e-mails were childish? Or\u00a0\nmaybe I'm a fucking embarrassment for somebody as popular as her. Or maybe, after all those years, she could finally see I'm just some weirdo who doesn't have any real friends.\u00a0How could she be so mean, after all those years? I know I never meant much to her, but she meant a lot to me. She was the only friend I had. And now she's going to the 4th grade from our middle school. They have other lunch breaks so I'll hardly ever see her again. And I'll keep wondering forever..", "summary": "A girl who was my\u00a0only friend a long time,\u00a0decided I wasn't good enough for her to be friends anymore (I guess) a few years ago. And I can't stop wondering why."}
{"id": "t3_ksdoc", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I thought I was straight until... (xpost: LGBT)", "post": "27/f. I've always been very sexual, but all of the sex that I've had has been with men. I have made out with two women, one straight and one gay. I recently met this girl through a friend who, to my knowledge, is also straight but is definitely an LGBT supporter. We hit it off immediately. We have similar interests, career goals, etc. I thought we'd just be great friends, but I also find her really attractive, and she has also said that she thinks I'm beautiful. We've said lightheartedly that we're falling in love, have admit that we have \"lady crushes\" on one another, and to top it all off, we had a sleepover last weekend where we cuddled all night long. We're both cuddly people, but this was the first time I ever spent all night in the arms of a female friend. I don't know her well enough to know if this is how she is with all of her friends or just me. Nothing more has happened, but we aren't going to stop hanging out or acting this way around one another, and it makes me curious where things could go. I'd hate to ruin our friendship by attempting something more or by making things awkward by initiating a serious conversation about it, and so any advice would be awesome. Thanks!", "summary": "I'm a straight girl falling for another straight girl, and I think the feelings are mutual. Not sure how to approach the situation."}
{"id": "t3_249e2x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (24F) am getting extremely tired of always initiating any physical contact with my bf (26M)", "post": "I've been with my Bf for a little over a year and things are not as HOT as they first were. For instance I always kiss him. He never just grabs me and kisses me. I've been yearning for him to take initiative. He doesn't hold me or any thing that you would consider romantic. I don't know what's wrong. Is it me? Is It him? I've been thinking hard about what I can do to change this. I'm actually sitting next to him with my legs on his and all he does is poke them. He doesn't grab them or massage them. We are watching TV it's been 4 hrs and no touching or kissing has occured. I'm falling apart I think I am the problem. I can't bring myself to tell him how I feel. I am afraid....plus I think it's common to be intimate with your gf. I don't think I need to ask for it. This has been going on for weeks now and it's driving me away. Last night I dreamed about getting intimate by one of my Co - worker's I have no interest in. It's the passion I lack in my relationship that I'm craving. I guess I need help with communicating this with him. Any advice? Similar stories? How to get past this?", "summary": "Bf doesn't kiss or touch me and now I'm fantasizing about a co-worker giving me the passion I desire. Please help!"}
{"id": "t3_3kymyc", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by dropping my iPhone from...", "post": "It was stormy weather in London today around noon so while holding my iPhone 6, which I should shamefully add is not backed up and I depend on to run my business (I know!), I reached out to close the window. Some awkward fumbling ensued and next thing I know my iPhone has gone out the window from the 13th floor onto concrete floor/grass below.\n\nRan to the lift, went out, trying to find it and it is laying over the footpath a metre or so away from the building. Some scratches but screen is fine and phone is working! Miracle. Not sure how but it made it.", "summary": "TIFU by dropping my iPhone that I use for my business from the 13th floor window, and could have potentially hurt someone as well at the bottom of the building."}
{"id": "t3_200967", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 F] with my boyfriend's ex [19 F] who I've known for 4 years. Should I apologize?", "post": "First off, let me know if I've flagged this wrong. \nSo, the situation is that I used to know my boyfriend's ex before we dated. I was friends with her sister and she always used to act weird with me. Now I know that she had some kind of girl crush on me and was infatuated in some way, so she was just acting shy. This set the stage, though, for alot of animosity between us. After having just learned some things about their relationship, I think she broke up with my boyfriend partly because she wanted to be like me (it's complicated). She and her sister then both completely cut off contact with my boyfriend, causing him alot of pain, because they were all close friends. \n\nThat's not what I want to apologize to anyone for, they all got themselves into that mess. But my boyfriend and I have had to deal with these girls since then due to a huge family emergency, and they're both friends with his sister still. I feel like I've done alot of asshole-ish things because I thought his ex didn't like me and he was still hung up on her. Now I know it's more complicated than that, he was never hung up on her, and she's probably been much more intimidated by me than anything else.\n\nI unfriended her on Facebook awhile ago. My boyfriend just unfriended her too, after finding out how threatened I felt by her. Now I just feel like a giant crazy cuntwaffle and I don't know what to do about it. \n\nHe doesn't really care about being friends with them and neither do I, but I feel fucking bad. I was thinking of sending a message to his ex apologizing and trying to explain my behavior, but I don't know if that's just...weird at this point. \n\nMy question is whether you guys think I should send this message or not. I honestly just want to clear the waters.", "summary": "I've misinterpreted things and acted like a big hairy cuntwaffle to my boyfriend's ex. Would it be weird for me to message her with an apology?"}
{"id": "t3_35i8g1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21F] had a miscarriage, didn't even know I was pregnant--how do I tell my SO? [23M]", "post": "Hi reddit. TMI below if you're queasy.\n\nStarted bleeding heavily two days ago, though I still had ten days left in my birth control. My periods have never been heavy, even off birth control, and I threw up several times and nearly passed out. It wasn't a LOT of blood, it was just thick, heavy, and I was cramping unbelievably. There were a few points where it was a heavy clot or the like passing through.\n\nAfter going to the women's clinic and doing some tests and answering a lot of questions, they told me it's likely I had a miscarriage. I have to have an ultrasound to make sure I don't have a uterine cyst but because my pain was more cramp-like they said it was more likely the miscarriage.\n\nI'm ok in regards to my own mental health. I already see a psychiatrist and the clinic is referring me to a counsellor who specializes in these scenarios as a follow-up. \n\nHowever the problem is my SO. I want to tell him. I told him about how badly I was bleeding but I did not tell him that I went to the clinic. He is under the assumption we will go together this week. Because I am anemic I decided I didn't want to wait (he works full time even on the weekends but gets two weekdays off in lieu) and endanger my health.\n\nNeither of us knew I was pregnant and we had been carrying on as usual. I'm afraid he will get mad or think I was lying to him about having my period. We have sex on my period but last time it was so light that he didn't notice at all. \n\nIs there... a proper way to go about this? What should I say? We have been dating way over a year now, and he mentioned he doesn't want kids until we're married and financially set, so I know he won't be upset that we lost the chance, but I just think it's a messed up ordeal and I have to explain why I don't want to go to the clinic again this week.", "summary": "I had a miscarriage, partner and I didn't know I was pregnant, he thinks we're gonna go this week to Planned Parenthood but I found this all out myself"}
{"id": "t3_2iiipz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is it too early for me [21M] to bring up wanting to start a relationship with the girl [20F] I have been seeing/talking to?", "post": "I will try and keep this short and sweet but I have been talking to this girl for about a month now. We went on a very easy going ice cream first date since were both pretty busy people and don't live in the same town and she works weekends. It went really well and ended up closing the place down and even just kept talking outside!\n\nFast forward to about a week in a half later she came to visit a friend to \"study\" that goes to my college and we casually hung out until her friend left. By this time it was night time and I told her before she even came she needed to see this really cool thing on campus and made it a surprise for her. I took her to these really nice ponds and walking trails and walked around talking and holding hands while looking at the stars which she loves to do. We stopped on a little bridge and were just talking which eventually led to me holding her and then kissing her. It got pretty late and she needed to get back for a test in the morning.\n\nDuring this whole time we have been texting each other nonstop and Facetimed a few times since were about an hour away from each other.", "summary": "I met a really awesome girl and have met up a couple of times already and wondering if it is way to early to bring up maybe starting a relationship with her."}
{"id": "t3_4fnoa8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Update] I [24F] just found out the guy [30M]I've been sleeping with for six months is getting married next weekend. Not sure what to do.", "post": "Previous post [here](\n. I forgot my password for the original account, so I hope this is ok.    \n\nI ended up emailing her on the Sunday afternoon, after I had messaged him a couple times. Turns out he didn't see my messages because he was talking to me on a separate phone, and didn't have it with him when she was over.  \n\n She responded to me, absolutely devastated, asking for more information, which I provided. Then she said she hates that I told her before the wedding, because either her wedding day is ruined while they try to work it out, or she has to cancel and then everyone will know. She wishes I had either waited or not told her. This was exactly my concern with telling her when I did and I feel awful.  \n\nMaybe she will eventually appreciate it, but I'm no longer convinced I did the correct thing. Maybe it was morally right, but it doesn't seem to have benefited anyone in the situation. And selfishly, it means that I probably won't ever understand for myself why this all happened, and what was real and what was a lie, especially if the wedding still happens. I know her feelings are really the important ones here, but I'm struggling as well. I sent him one more text asking him to give me some answers, with the note that if she asked him to stop corresponding with me to just ignore my text.  I haven't heard anything back yet and I'm doubting I ever will.  \n\nI guess I'm looking for any advice on how I can move forward from this, because I don't know how. This is the first time I've ever been in any kind of relationship/FwB situation outside of my previous 7 year relationship, and I'm struggling to understand how someone could do this.", "summary": "Told the bride about the situation. She's absolutely devasted that I told her when I did, and I'm struggling to figure out if I did the right thing, and how to move on from this."}
{"id": "t3_2oemtq", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by exposing the people of Walgreens to the Fappening [NSFW]", "post": "This FU began about a week ago.  So I was at a friends house with about 8 other people one night while we were all home from school and somehow the events of the Fappening came up in conversation.  My one friend asked what it was and we explained the leaked celebrity nudes that were released.  He naturally asked to see them, and since no one had them saved I downloaded an album of them.  My other friend asked me to move them to my SD card so he could transfer them to his phone later.\n\nFast forward to two days ago, when I am back at school.  My buddy sends me some pictures and asks them to put them on a memory card so we can go to Walgreens and get them printed.  Since he sent them over text, I naturally saved them to my SD card in my phone.  The Walgreens is in the middle of the city and is fairly crowded with people wanting to print Christmas cards and whatnot.  So we go onto the computer and insert my SD card, and the computer displays all of the pictures on the SD card, which at the time only had photos of naked famous people and two of my buddies pictures.  So as I'm shouting [no, no, no] pictures from the Fappening are filling the large comuter screen for everyone else in line behind me to see.  I just selected the pictures my buddy sent me, printed them and pretended nothing happened.  Safe to say I won't be going back to Walgreens for a while.", "summary": "Opened an SD card with pictures from the Fappening on the picture counter's computer in a crowded Walgreens."}
{"id": "t3_4elu5k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my Boyfriened[27 M] 5months, Relationship advice,", "post": "So we been dating for a few months, and I just found out he has been lying to me. When we started dating I had asked if he was smoking tobacco(Y), Drugs and he told me no, he reenforced he couldn't if he wanted due to him being a gov worker. A month ago I started smelling pot, he kept telling me maybe it was me, maybe it was the coffee we were making. Keep reinforcing it was my mind, or maybe his friend. Last night I come to find, after helping him look for a document at his house, synthetic weed. \nWhen confronted he said he just recently bought it for us to try, knowing I have sever asthma, calling BS he confessed yet again that he started 7yrs ago for \"sleep\". He was angry that I was \"digging\" after he told me it was ok.\nI did out of anger throw it out, he was angry over that.\nWhat should I do? I really like this guy, but this is just a slam,\nAdvice?", "summary": "Boyfriend that I've dated x4months lied to me over smoking weed (told me at beginning of relationship he didn't do drugs) Should I stay with him?"}
{"id": "t3_12ax54", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Mechanics of reddit, please help me out! my Chrysler sebring is acting crazy", "post": "Ive got a 1998 chrysler sebring jxi. i know these cars have been known to have electrical issues, and unfortunately, i am one of those lucky ones to be dealing with one. When I crank my car (which cranks fine), my dash shows me idling at 4000RPM, my gas gauge fluctuates, and my radio goes in and out. ive taken the car to a few mechanics and theyve tested the battery and alternator. everything is working with those. apparently it is some issue with the engine computer or the bcm (body control module). \n\nthis is the question. should i just take this car to the chrysler dealership or should i find another mechanic. i dont really trust mechanics because ive been ripped off before, but i hear dealerships are just as bad usually.\nBefore i take the car in in the morning, can you let me know what possible issues the car might have? and how much you think it would be to fix? do you think it will be an expensive fix?", "summary": "my cars display gauges are jumping around and the radio cuts out on me. am i looking at an expensive fix? "}
{"id": "t3_3el01p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [33 M] with my SO/ex SO [30 F] of 5 years, got into a text message blowout, and I need help showing where I was wrong and saying sorry.", "post": "My SO and I are on the heavy, heavy rocks.  She's moved out and is at her sister's for two weeks now.  She keeps my son a lot of the time, but she's good about letting me pick him up after work so I can be with him, then drop him off with her in the morning before I go to work.  He's the only thing keeping me sane right now.  \n\nThe roughness stems from my own issues.  I've been diagnosed with BPD, and needless to say it's rough on relationships.  I'm seeking help, and will do everything I can to get my family back.  She said that she might do couples counseling with me if she thinks I've made progress with my own personal counselor.  \n\nI texted her today to ask about having a party for our son's birthday coming up in a week.  She set off one of my triggers (anything that would hurt my son or my relationship with him) and I blew up.  I think I really hurt my chances of getting back together with her. When I'm like this, it gets hard for me to think objectively.  Thanks", "summary": "I ranted at my SO/ex SO via text, please read the texts and tell me how bad it is, and if I can recover."}
{"id": "t3_mqgjt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Somebody PLEASE tell me what to do", "post": "I can't make a decision :(\n\nI'm 19, a sophomore in college, and I'm studying architecture. With that said, I've been working at a medical billing company doing data entry since August. I work Mo/Wed/Fri, and sometimes Saturday. I work from 9:30 AM to 5:00-6:00 PM, and it's an hour away. I have classes literally all day on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I leave my apartment at 9:45 AM, and get back at 10:00 PM. I'm barely keeping up with school. I spend all of my free time doing homework. I barely sleep anymore. I'm exhausted.\n\nMy boss wants to promote me to executive assistant. He's been very pushy, and insists that I work at least 4 days a week beginning in January. I'd get my own office, health benefits, and I'd actually be important there. Problem is, I don't have the time. I'm trying to override into a Calculus class that meets once a week so as to meet his \"working 4 days a week\" schedule, but I don't know if I can get it. All of the other classes meet at least twice a week during the day. My other classes are night classes so that's fine. \n\nMy problem is that I desperately don't want to take this job. However, I really need the money. My rent is about $500/month. Gas about $100/month (I commute to school). I feel like my body is wearing out and I'm unhappy all of the time. I'm only 19-- I don't want a career! The only thing I look forward to is going to my Architecture classes because I'm actually interested in them. I could take out loans, but I don't want to be starting that already... I still have a long time to be in school. My parents are pushing me to stick with it, because, well, they don't have money either.\n\nPlease tell me I can quit :(", "summary": "Super busy because of job and school, super unhappy. Boss wants to promote me to full time. I need money, but I want to quit. TELL ME TO QUIT"}
{"id": "t3_15rt57", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is what I did (21/f) an end all be all with my 7 year long relationship (21/m)?", "post": "I recently came to my significant other and spoke to him candidly about what I did. 2 years ago I had a crush on someone for about a school semester, spoke to him, hid I spoke to him. I feel like I did it because I felt very low about myself, felt nice to have someone make me feel good. It was not a serious crush/liking. I never expressed my feelings to him, but we did talk often and I hid it and realized it was wrong after looking back objectively. Recently, I had another crush on someone else, I felt flattered someone would like me, but I never flirted, never wanted him over my s/o but again hid speaking to him, even though it was never sexual conversations. Both were ones you would have with a friend. It was mostly about school, studying, sometimes about family things, regular conversations, never sexual or flirty.\n\nI see marriage with my s/o and wanted to come to him and tell him this as I did not want any secrets or hidden feelings anymore. I was honest with him, told him everything, told him sometimes I would fantasize/think about these guys (only the second guy was sexual; the first guy was mostly just thinking about hanging out or having fantasies of him noticing me and seeing me as beautiful (kind of weird thinking back to it now)). I haven't spoken to the first guy in a year or more as I realized how wrong it was of me, and I have also cut off contact with the second guy as well. I have no intentions of continuing speaking to them.\n\nI told him this. I know it could be considered emotional cheating, which is why I came clean. He said the fact that I would think about them ruined everything. He says I ruined the past 7 years now, that it is too late now to make this right. I never expected him to end this. Is this really unfixable?", "summary": "> told bf recently i had crushes/spoke to guys/no flirting. He ended it. Is this unfixable?"}
{"id": "t3_4061b6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20 M] will no longer have lunch with me[20 F] because I am in a relationship with a mutual friend.", "post": "My friend, lets call him Bob, has known me since we both started uni four years ago. We met my boyfriend at about the same time and I started dating my bf a few months ago. So, my boyfriend and I are both friends with him but since I have started dating my bf Bob will not go to lunch with my during uni unless my bf is there. My bf has told me he respects boundaries but I feel like I am not Bob's friend if he is making me feel like I need a chaperone to hang out with him. \n\nIf he was my bf's friend first or if he met my boyfriend and I while we were dating I would understand but I feel like, because I am female I am now no longer a friend but just his other friends girl friend. I feel like, I am no longer an individual because of this. Similar things happen with other people at uni where, if we are in a lecture they will sit beside me but then get up and move to let my boyfriend sit there instead. Because he is my boyfriend ... I can't be an individual and people just assume he has to be with me all the time. He seems fine with it but I feel like I am just getting lonely only being able to be with people if I am with him, as part of a couple and not just me. I am on an all male course also.", "summary": "Mutual friends not doing things with me that they did before because they have to \"respect boundries\" for my bf."}
{"id": "t3_ym22f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How long should I wait for the \"L\" word? [m25, f22]", "post": "I've been with my boyfriend for almost six months now and we're very happy.  We sleep together most nights, talk about the future frequently, and commonly express how lucky we feel to be together and how glad we are that we're together.  As of right now, I feel like he could be on track to be my life partner. (Maybe it's delusional, but I like to think that its a matter of comfort--a lot of the reason that we're together and so serious is that we're just comfortable, and we strangely enough just fit together.)  \n\nHowever, it's been nagging on my brain: My boyfriend still hasn't said that he loves me.  I know he cares about me.  I can see it in the way he treats me and in the immense amount of time he spends with me.  I'm not particularly UPSET that he doesn't said it, because I'm simply happy to be happy and to be with someone who for some reason wants to be with me,  but I'm just wondering, reddit, how long did you wait for that magical word? And how long do you think I should wait?\n\n(I would just say it first, but I want it to be a special moment, and I dont want it to be an awkward \"oh, I don't feel that way yet\" or a pitty/pressured \"I love you.\")", "summary": "its been six months, my boyfriend hasn't said i love you. how long did you wait and how long until I should be concerned?"}
{"id": "t3_18z8f6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "To what extent are S/O responsible?", "post": "Sorry for asking reddit for relationship advice.  However this one blows me away and I am not sure what else to do.  BACKGROUND:My girlfriend and I have been dating for awhile. We typically see each other every night but on one occasion I hung out with friends an hour later than I had anticipated so we were unable to.  I sent a text apologizing for losing track of time and response was sent a picture of the results of her cutting herself.\n  This has never happened before but obviously makes me question the relationship! At what point are significant others responsible? I care about her but if not hanging out leads to cutting I am scared that what will result from ending the relationship.", "summary": "Apologized for losing track of time.  Received the result picture of cutting herself.  I dont know what to do and am scared of what could result if I end it."}
{"id": "t3_53q2dm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He [25M] said it didn't feel 'natural' to be with me [22F]", "post": "I was seeing this guy for a month and it started off really strong. We would try to see each other all the time, we would talk on the phone every night for hours, we would text all day.\n\nWhen we first met, there was a lot of chemistry and we were very upfront about what we wanted - both of us wanted relationships as an endgoal.\n\nI was hesitant at first about being so lovey-dovey so quick, but he seemed so genuine when he told me how he felt, so I kind of dove in right behind him.\n\nAfter our first couple of dates, he went on vacation and things were still amazing. We would talk all the time and feelings only grew. He came back and we had another date (and sex) and things fizzled.\n\nAfter that, he flaked on our next planned date, but made sure to plan another one in its place. We did go out, had sex again, but things didn't change. It still felt different. I told him if he had lost interest, it was fine - it happens. But he still said he wanted to talk to and see me, but it was just work and distance (he lives an hour away) that was making it hard.\n\nWe tried make plans one more time for him to come down. He said \"he will let me know,\" and didn't end up texting me all that day. I broke things off because I've played this game before - someone who wants to be with me, would be. This guy did not. So I pretty much ended things, saying it was just disappointing but for the best, and he agreed.\n\nDays later, he texted me and apologized. Said the more he saw me, it didn't feel \"natural for us to be together\" and work just made it harder. Also told me it wasn't anyone else in the picture either. We kind of got into a back and forth and he admit, he just lost interest. He pretty much said he strung me along because \"he just wanted to like me back\" which is confusing to me, because in the beginning all he could talk about was how much he liked me.", "summary": "A guy I saw a lot of potential with fizzled out on me because apparently he didn't like me back, and I can't stop thinking about it and what went wrong."}
{"id": "t3_2xh7os", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do I (20M) poke a girl I met (20F) on Facebook??", "post": "So I met this girl at a party the other night, we were super wasted. Anyways, we seemed to hit it off enough and talked for like 2 hours. (totally had my arm around her too it was awesome) So the next morning I wake up and she added me on FB and sent me a message saying \"sorry if i said anything dumb\" or something along those lines and we continued to talk for like 7 messages, and then I kinda didnt know what to say so I didnt wanna reply. Only thing is though shes a bit of a cutie and I'm tryna see if I can hit it or sum'. So I guess I dont know what step I should do, do people still poke eachtother on Facebook? Like is that still a thing? Either way Reddit I need your help help your boy out.", "summary": "Girl I met at a party got ahold of me on facebook, and Im trying to figure out how to talk to her in a non creepy fashion so I can smash."}
{"id": "t3_2krrao", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "He [28m] seems to have lost interest and I [25f] don't really understand", "post": "In August, I met who I thought was a great guy on okcupid. We hit it off online immediately and began texting constantly. After about a week, he asked me out to dinner and a movie and it was the best date I'd ever been on. We began seeing each other 2-3 Times a week and fell into an easy rhythm. It seemed like we were going to become official and we both said we weren't seeing anyone else. \n\nAbout a month ago, he became a bit distant, and stopped texting as much. I asked what was up and he explained he hadn't lost interest, but was adjusting to a new job. We had a great talk and things went back to normal- talking a lot and hanging out every few days. \n\nWithin this past week, I feel like things have changed completely. Rather than him just taking a while to text back, he has completely ignored my texts or gone entire days without texting me himself. When we do talk, it's me carrying the conversation. \n\nWe only hung out one time and that was in a bar, not alone, but everything was exactly how it always is. We were relaxed and he acted completely normal. He even kissed me goodnight.  But then the next day he didn't answer my text and blew off the plans we had made. \n\nAt this point, I don't know how to proceed. I really like him and that is a big step for me. I never date and I don't want to ruin things with the first person I've fallen for in years. On the other hand, I feel like I'm not a priority at all and that hurts. \n\nI don't want to come on too strong and I want to give him space to adjust to his new job, but how do I know if that's what this is? How do I know he hasn't lost interest all together? And if he has, how do I get over it?", "summary": "After a great start to our relationship, he has stopped texting and asking me to hang out. Says he adjusting to a new job, but how do I know if that's what this is, and that he hasn't lost interest?"}
{"id": "t3_3hgtfj", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "I caught my boss adding extra time to her pay sheet and don't know what to do", "post": "I am in charge of checking payroll where I work, and I see how many hours people work during the pay period (2 weeks). We've had a lighter month than usual, and a few people were commenting that they didn't work as much because of it. What should have been 80 hours, was more like 70-75. One person barely broke 60. \n\nI noticed my boss had 80+ hours, even though she took two half-days during this pay period. She over compensated her paid time off (PTO). She added time to her half-days so that she had close to 10 hours for each of her days off, even though she didn't put in more than 8 hours a day at work this whole month (she worked closer to 7 hrs a day). She is constantly complaining about the budget and complains when we (the employees) need supplies (you know, for our jobs). I feel like she's cheating the company by taking extra time off she didn't earn, and even getting some over time when she's pretty much the only one (there is a specialist who has the most work out of everyone regardless). I'm not mad she took PTO, I'm mad because she intentionally set it for more than 8 hours to boost her paycheck. \n\nThe problem is, I can't do anything about it. I have a very low position and I hold no sway. I can't tell the higher ups in the company/corporation, because she's in good with all of them and it will just come back to bite me. I can't tell the other employees because that will just start more drama and tension in the office. I'm also not entirely sure if what she did was unethical in taking advantage of the situation, or if anything wrong actually took place. \n\nSo, is this unethical or illegal, or am I just not used to office politics?", "summary": "\u2013 my boss added hours to her work week when there was a lull, and there's nothing I can do or say to keep this from happening again. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_1738ol", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [M26] and my girlfriend [F31] are constantly over-analysing our new relationship [3 weeks].", "post": "So my girlfriend and I were both Forever-Alone types until we met. Neither of us have had a major relationship since high school, and as a result we're both out of practice and super-paranoid about everything. And since we're both massive geeks, we're constantly looking for information and validation on what we're doing.\n\nWhenever we do anything, we over-analyse our actions way too much, instead of just doing it. The day after our first kiss, we spent half an hour talking nervously about how we kiss, if we like it, if the other person didn't like it, etc. By the end both of us felt embarassed and apologised for asking so many questions.\n\nWhether it's physical stuff like hugging or kissing, or other stuff like where to go on dates, when to see each-other and the like we're always having meta-conversations about what we're doing. Besides the meta stuff, our relationship is pretty awesome (we're both *incredibly* attracted to one another, physically & mentally).", "summary": "Me & GF are out of practice and overly nitpicky about our relationship. Is this just a natural part of a new relationship, or is there some way we can minimise it?"}
{"id": "t3_1bquuo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [F, 30s] life is much harder than his [BF, M, 30s, together 2 years], the imbalance makes me uncomfortable. What do?", "post": "My life is just (or at least seems to be) a lot harder than his.  My job is more intense and my boss a lot less flexible than his, thus I work more hours and get less vacation.  Although we have the same type of job at different places, mine just seems to come with more responsibility and more demands and expectations.  I am also pretty high-up in a field which is mostly men, and I feel I have gotten this far by always being better than the men to be considered equal.  I am also an only child taking care of my parents who are both ill.  Lastly, I pursue more hobbies and interests and social contact outside of just my boyfriend to feel fulfilled and satisfied.  As a result of all this, I am often tired and need a fair amount of care a support.  I don't get much time off from my job to recover, either. This imbalance in our relationship makes me uncomfortable, \n\nWhen this all started, I thought it would be a few months and then we would reach an equilibrium and maybe even he would have some problems and it would be my time to be the supportive one.  But his life is still relatively stress free, and things have only gotten more stressful for me now as my job gets more intense (we are dependent on government funding, which just got cut, and means more work and less people) and my parents' health has continued to decline.  It's been well over a year of this mess and shows no sign of letting up soon.\n\nI shouldn't always be the one who needs to be taken care of, I feel.  His life is pretty great, I guess (except for the over-extended girlfriend), but I feel like I am a parasite.  \n\nThis is a tricky thing to talk about, especially with him.  He knows he is supposed to be a supportive partner so there is really no safe way for him to tell me this is too much for him without making himself look like a bad boyfriend or like some dirtbag that might abandon me in my time of need.", "summary": "Work and family responsibilities mean I am always over-extended, and less flexible and more frazzled than my boyfriend.  He is always taking care of me and I am uncomfortable with this imbalance.  What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_3g67ez", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] desperately need to leave my partner [26/M], but I have nowhere to go.", "post": "I need to leave my partner of 4.5 years, but I don't know where to go.\n\nLong story short... we are just two different people and want two different things out of life.  We get along well enough as friends, but we have very little romantic, and no sexual (he was abusive) attraction between us.  All we do is either ignore each other, or bicker over petty crap.  A few days ago, he tried to grab a knife out of my hands because he didn't want me to make dinner for him.  It is beyond toxic.\n\nUnfortunately I am financially dependent on him, 100%.  I cannot survive on my own.  I have no education, no job, nothing to my name.  I suffer from chronic depression and anxiety, and could not handle the stress of a full time job.  It makes things very difficult.\n\nMy family is loving and supportive, but they barely have a sofa for me to sleep on.  They are going through their own financial hardships, and  I cannot burden them.  I also have pets that need safe accommodation.\n\nWhere the hell do I go?  I feel so trapped.  My relationship is so destructive, and I know it needs to end, before I spiral even further down.  But where do I go?  Who do I turn to?  I cannot even fathom starting to get my own **** together when I'm living with someone who, in part, put me in this situation.  He is NOT supportive or uplifting at all, and if you've ever lived with depression, you know how much harder that makes everything.  And it could take YEARS before I'm in a position to financially support myself.\n\nI can't get out...", "summary": "I am depressed and stuck in a destructive, dead end relationship.  I want out, but I have no money, nowhere to go, and no one to turn to for help."}
{"id": "t3_3tsx6g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19M] have never been on a date. Don't know if l ever will.", "post": "This could be long. Oh well. Anyway, l have never gone out with anyone. At least not in the romantic sense. I've never been asked either. I even went to my senior prom by myself. I was probably the only one there who didn't go with someone. I don't know.\n\n  Well, a little about myself. For starters, I'm gay. Most of my friends know lol. I'm really into (old) music. Goth, Punk, Deathrock, 80's indie/ jangle pop. I also like some non- alternative music, mostly old school. Some days, l look like l attended a Victorian funeral. Other days, l look like a cross dressing burlesque performer out of Tim Burton's mind. l also have a kick ass mohawk lol. Last l checked, it was almost 9 inches tall. But enough about me.\n\n  Back to the problem. I feel no likes me. Well, no one has shown any interest. Maybe l'm being impatient? I don't know. I guess l feel unattractive. Unwanted, perhaps? I also don't know if l want to meet someone through the internet (although l wouldn't be opposed to it). I'm not really sure how l should go about things.\n\n  I guess l haven't approached the right people? I mean, l can strike up a conversation with anyone. I have reasonably good social skills. Maybe no one will approach me? Not sure. I'm not trying to complain or anything. I just wanna put it out there. I'm sure there's something l'm not doing right.\n\n  I need input, at the very least. Perhaps a step in another direction that l haven't considered. There's not much else l can think of. I don't know if l should wait or what. I could end up waiting forever. Anyway, I would appreciate any thoughts, advice, etc. I apologize if l don't respond or anything. But rest assured, l will indeed read comments. Thank you :)", "summary": "I've never gone out with anyone. I could be doing something wrong. Maybe l never will, maybe l might. What should l do? I'm really quite clueless, unfortunately."}
{"id": "t3_2jw9us", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not checking I had nice shoes for an interview...", "post": "Probably not worthy of some of the stories on here, but it was a fuck up none the less. I had an interview today, and I checked last week that my smart shoes were still where I left them, opened my wardrobe, saw two leather shoes, good, still there, fantastic, I'll polish them the morning of the interview before I go. \n\nSome backstory may be required here, I may have mentioned on Reddit previously that I have rather large feet. (UK 14-15), so it's difficult to buy nice shoes that aren't for working on building sites. I buy them online, and I usually buy two or three pairs to see me through for at least a few months. I last bought shoes 12 months ago. \n\nAnyway, I pull them out this morning, and place them upon my bedroom floor, when it occurs to me that they're not exactly what I was hoping for. They were both for my left foot. Not a problem, I thought, dig deeper into the cupboard, and the right will be found. Was it fuck. I had the entire wardrobe out, and couldn't find a right shoe anywhere. I then spent an hour ringing around shoe shops in my relatively local area, asking if they did smart shoes in a size 15. No, they didn't. \n\nI was there, in a room full of suited guys, dressed in a shirt with dark jeans and bright white basketball trainers on.... Fortunately the company has no dress code, and someone else was wearing slightly less obnoxious trainers, and nothing was mentioned.", "summary": "Didn't check my shoe situation, 2 hours before an interview realised I had two left shoes and not one right shoe. Had to go in trainers."}
{"id": "t3_27mc0u", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU By having self esteem issues, constant worrying and paranoia", "post": "This happened just a few minutes ago. My girlfriend and I, lets call her Jan, were sending pics to each other. Jan is pansexual. She accidentally sent me a picture of one of our friends, we will call her Hope. This is where my low self esteem, paranoia and worrying begins. I asked her why she had a pic of her on her phone, she replied with \"it was a good picture. Plus I kinda like her.\" I start asking her if she'd ever leave me for someone else, cheat on me, etc. She got really mad and said \"Trev, I think we should see other people.\"", "summary": "lost literally the only person I had in my life due to having paranoia and low self esteem and for constantly worrying about little things."}
{"id": "t3_dzlpp", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you define your nationality?", "post": "*", "summary": "The place my ancestors are from is now a different country. How does this affect me, and why should it (or shouldn't it) affect me?"}
{"id": "t3_1avd38", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[M] How to initiate grinding/kissing at prom? [Both 17]", "post": "I became good friends with a girl that I know has liked me for about a year and we are going to prom together next month. She told my friends that she wants to kiss and grind together at prom, but she said I would have to initiate it. I have literally no experience with girls and feel that things are still a little awkward between us. I feel like we are both ready to start getting a little more serious but I feel like I might get nervous when the time comes and I'll miss out. Any tips on how to initiate grinding and kissing while still feeling comfortable would be appreciated.\n\nAlso, if anyone has any tips on how to grind/kiss/dance at prom that would be awesome too. I've never gone out with anyone so this is pretty much completely new to me.", "summary": "New to dating; my prom date wants to grind and kiss at prom but I have no experience with either so I need advice on how to initiate and how to grind, dance, and kiss at prom."}
{"id": "t3_1iodv0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by wearing a pee-towel around my neck", "post": "So we (21 M/F) are cuddling downstairs and being dorks on our computers as usual, when I feel a weird mood come on to me. We talk about it, turns out I'm just having one of those bad mood days, so my wonderful boyfriend leads me upstairs and draws a nice hot bath for me, with candles and classical music and everything on the side.  \n\nAfter about five minutes in this hot bath, I have to pee AND I'm in need of some nice cool water to drink. He offers to get me a glass of ice water, so as soon he's out of the bathroom I hop up and head for the toilet. I have to move his laptop off the lid, sending both our phones (which we were resting on the keyboard) flying to the floor. Amid the loud noises and movement, my bladder decides it's safe to release, and a small dribble hits the tile.  \n\nI'm forced to squeeze those muscles tight (which is no easy thing once it's time to go) while I get everything else in order, phones back to safety on the counter, laptop off in the corner away from steam and water, etc, but there's now the problem of a puddle on the floor.  \n\nWhile I finally release myself into the proper receptacle, I tossed a small hand towel onto the puddle. When the show's over, the boyfriend enters the room, and I tell him I accidentally got water on the floor when I hopped up to pee. I don't tell him about the pee on the floor, however.  \n\nMinutes later, he grabs up the towel, soaks it in the hot bathwater, and wraps it around my neck to soothe my sore neck muscles (I have a nasty condition from an injury more than 10 years ago), and I keep my mouth shut because I know he would get upset and feel like he messed up somehow if I told him the truth. So I awkwardly sat with the pee-towel draped over my shoulders while he played me beautiful violin music and cheered me up for another 10 minutes.", "summary": "Almost had an accident on BF's bathroom floor and covered it up with a handtowel, which he unknowingly wet and wrapped around my neck to comfort me."}
{"id": "t3_3ahjbt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (19M) with my GF (19F), I love our dynamic but her lack of affection is killing our closeness", "post": "So I'll try to make this short. My GF and I met at school and are currently apart for the summer in a LDR. Physically, she is very affectionate and whenever we're together it feels like we're extremely close. Verbally, we both like to rip on each other all the time. This is great and I love the dynamic because it's always fun and light hearted, but it only works when we have the physical affection to balance it out. She really has trouble expressing any affection verbally, so now that we're apart and continue our sarcastic dynamic, some issues have sprung up. I almost feel like I'm looked down at this point because there is just 0 reinforcement of her positive feelings towards me. We've talked about it and she feels horrible, but we honestly don't know how to fix it..help?", "summary": "Gf and I rip on each other, but she can't express verbal affection to balance it out. How can we work on this?"}
{"id": "t3_1auhsz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What do you do when your in an almost completely sexless/romantic relationship? (m26)(f27)", "post": "I've tried everything, we've talked about it, I've given her literature to read, I've shown her reddit, and given her suggestions as to how we could improve our sex life.  I'm no sex fiend, but I do enjoy having sex more than twice a month.  She has no, sex drive.  When we do have sex it is un-enjoyable for me, and for her it seems like work.  We used to have a great sex life, and everything that entails.  But, I cannot do anything to get it back.  We've been dating for 4 years and it seems like (to put it in stupid terms) friend zoned.  I take her on dates, lay with her before she goes to bed every night, cook for her, and so on.  Im not saying I'm perfect, but I don't believe this is right.  Am I wrong? Is this how every long term relationship is? This has been going on for about 2.5 years out of the 4 year relationship.", "summary": "sexless relationship (M26) (F27) I've tried a lot of different things, and it just seems like her sex drive is non-existant and she isn't willing to work on it."}
{"id": "t3_t6cc7", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I do it? Trying to build up the courage to ask a mum at my son's school out", "post": "Hi guys,\n\nGoing through my post history, you'll all see I'm a single dad (27) with 3 kids. 2 of which I have full custody and the remaining one is shared custody.\n\nI work full time so my boys go to after-hours school care. Most mornings and evenings there's a mum, a nurse for the hospital in the area that drops off and picks up her own two boys the same time I do. We do talk, but not much\n\nNow I don't really date. I haven't done much dating since the seperation as I've been focussing on the kids. But this mum, my brain keeps telling me to ask her but I keep refusing to because:\n\n1) Even though I only ever see her and not the dad, I'm afraid I might be \nasking out a taken mum. It could make her see me in a different light. Do you think I could ask her kids if mum and dad are together? and;\n\n2) Afraid of the rejection\n\n2) I'm a chicken shit sober lol. My last real relationship was with my kids mum. I was with her from when I was 18 until early last year. So I lack any confidence\n\nWHY THE HELL DO I CHICKEN OUT?!? Help a redditor out guys! What do I do to get back into the game?", "summary": "There's a mum at my son's school that I want to bang. But I'm too chicken shit to ask her out"}
{"id": "t3_272vlr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25 F] am really insecure. I made a list of why I want to break up with my girlfriend [32 F] of 6 months, and most of them are me feeling like I'm not good enough for her - are such reasons not valid?", "post": "Reasons why we should break up:\n\n* I feel inadequate in bed - she's had over 40 partners (she admits she's a sexual deviant), and she is into scene and kink, things I'm inexperienced with\n* She's very open with her feelings, but this translates to her always telling me why I should break up with her\n* She's bipolar and has been very dark for awhile.  It's been bringing me down. I feel stressed and anxious often\n* I feel like my opinions don't count (I know I'm being insecure).  She has really thought out the answers and reasoning to a lot of things, and I feel like my own viewpoints aren't as good as hers, so why even bother?\n* She's into mindfullness/chakras, and I just don't believe in that all that much\n* My family will never like her - I'm from a country club family and she's tattooed, rides a Harley, and comes off as very harsh\n* There are a lot of silences lately - we just can't hold a conversation anymore. I feel like it's my fault, but she also isn't helping\n* She talks about her ex-wife all the time\n\nBut dammit, I think about her constantly and I really care about her.  I loved her at one point.  Things are so messy right now that I don't feel that way.  I'm also worried about her.  I don't want to push her over the edge. I feel like I need to be around after the break up, but I'll be out of town this week and her birthday is the following weekend.", "summary": "I'm super insecure, but we have a lot of issues - is it a work on myself problem rather than a break up?"}
{"id": "t3_3761o7", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "I'm an inexperienced teen [19F] who has a crush on someone in an LDR [22M].", "post": "I met him at work last year, at the time he seemed very friendly and welcomed me with open arms. He's always been goofy towards me, wanting to make me laugh, etc. All of this looked like innocent flirting to me until it was revealed that he has a long distance girlfriend.\n\nAfter I learned that, it was kind of hard to feel the same about his actions toward me, but I still feel like he treats me a little differently than everyone else. He's extremely helpful when it isn't required of him, tends to be around me a lot, and often jumps into conversations I'm having. He still acts jokey and remembers our past conversations as well.\n\nI could also just be inexperienced and reading waaay too much into everything, but I dunno. I'm not sure how to get past this and I just want guidance on how to distance myself without hurting my relationship with him.", "summary": "I'm attracted to a very friendly, yet taken coworker and not sure how he feels about me. Don't want these feelings nor do I want to accidentally come onto him."}
{"id": "t3_2h5jxn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my ex [19 F] of 2 years, planned to still be friends but she's moved on", "post": "Hey guys,\nSo my ex and I both 19 were together for roughly 2 years both of our first real relationships.  Towards the end of the summer this year I had brought up the idea of taking a break.  We are both in colleges in separate states and long distance wasn't really working out.  So we said our good-byes 4 weeks ago and went to school.\n\nWe both tried to stay friends talking to eachother 3 or 4 times a week still via facebook or texting.  Very open about how we were both having a hard time with the current situation.  Today which is a little more than 4 weeks probably 30 days or so since we broke up I get a text saying she is seeing someone.\n\nThis news about her seeing someone I did not take well at all.  As far as I knew we were both still slightly hung up on eachother as of a week ago which was ascertained via our conversations.  I called her asking if she was serious and if I was that easy to move on from.  Turns out 1 year of chasing a girl and 2 years dating them and they can replace you in 4 weeks.\n\nI just need to know if I am overreacting that I think it was way too quick and it shows how much she really cared about me.  I feel like an afterthought and after trying to talk to her for 30 minutes I pretty much said I'm all set with this notation of being friends.  Everything just blindsided me since we were both being open about what was happening.  Just feel easily replaceable and the ex thinks nothing is wrong.", "summary": "After 2 years of dating I was replaced in 4 weeks and didn't take the news well want to know how to deal with it and if I am overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_457213", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23F] with my boyfriend [27M] 1year, told me he is curious to see me with someone else during argument", "post": "This is my first relationship and he has past exes before. Everytime we have a big argument, he tells me that he's curious to see me with someone else just to see who is being reasonable or unreasonable. \n\nIs there an explanation for him to say that to me?\nOr is it okay for him to say that to me? \nShould I just brush it off?\n\nI love him so much and its only been a year together and this statement comes up often when we have a big fight usually from something that I bring up initially. \nThe arguement ends up being big because of misunderstandings and little details like tone of voice and attitudes while we're trying to solve the problem.\n\nHe says that he cares about me but would you say that to someone you care about?\n\nI feel so hurt when he says that to me. I would never want to see him with someone else, or even think about him seeing someone else.", "summary": "Together for a year, this is my first relationship. During a fight would you tell your SO \"I want to see you with someone else\" to justify who is being unreasonable?"}
{"id": "t3_37c64b", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Should I say something to her?", "post": "So I've known this girl for a about 4 months now and helped her through a breakup...or at least what I thought was a breakup. She has cried to me down the phone about 5 times, saying how much of a dick this guy was and she doesn't know why she still likes him. He treated her like shit but she still kept speaking to him and still does to this day albeit slightly less. \nSo when they *broke up* she was extremely happy and we went to my friends house and had a good night. Long story short we ended up kissing and I thought everything was going to be good. So we get speaking and we go for days out and spend nights together with my friends but nothing else has happened since the first kiss which I don't mind since she has just gone through a breakup and I know it takes time. But as we speak on the phone she keeps mentioning how her Ex is messaging her saying he misses her and how she should go to his house. Then she tells me that he has been ringing her trying to apologise but she tells him that she wants nothing to do with him. This just really starts to piss me off now since I like this girl and I think she likes me back from what I can tell and how we are together when we are around other people.\nBut, on Saturday we were at my friends house with around 6 other people...one of them being one of my best friend who just happens to be good friends with her Ex. We are partying all night and drinking when my friend tells me that the girl I like still speak to her Ex regularly and he thinks there Is still something there.\nNow I can't get this feeling out of my stomach that I am just chasing nothing If she still likes this guy. I don't know whether to just ask her or leave it and hope that she stops speaking to him if we hang out more.", "summary": "Girl I like and who likes me is still speaking to her Ex sometimes; don't know whether to confront her or leave it."}
{"id": "t3_2y7jp3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] am moving and my [23/M] boyfriend of 2 years doesn't want to live together.", "post": "First time poster - but I just need to get this out.\n\nMy boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. We have been in an LDR since August (8 months) but it is not an extremely long drive so we see each other fairly often (probably every other weekend). We have talked about getting married, but I want to wait until I am finished with grad school to plan a wedding.\n\nI am about to move to go to grad school in the same city he lives in (the decision was for the program, not for him.. just an added bonus). Over the summer when we talked about this being a possibility, he was gung ho about moving in together but has since changed his tune and keeps asking me where I am looking at apartments, what rent will be, if I am looking for a roommate, etc.\n\nI am not fully funded and will have to have a job on top of my graduate studies in order to pay for rent and partial tuition. My BF knows this but does not seem to understand how unnecessary it would be for us to pay to live in separate apartments less than 10 minutes away from each other when I can't afford it (this is not an issue for him, as he has a great job and more money than he needs). Rent would be cheaper for both of us if we split it and moved in together.", "summary": "LDR; Moving to same city as LT BF - he wants us to live in separate apartments. Is it unreasonable for me to want to live together?"}
{"id": "t3_1nhc9x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] and my girlfriend [17F] have been together for 4 months, and she has suddenly began to doubt whether i really \"need\" her and \"love\" her. Advice would be great, I have no idea what to do anymore.", "post": "We've been extremely happy for 4 months now, and we began dating right at the end of my sophomore year of HS (her junior year) and we truly love each other a great deal. However, she has recently been having extremely intense mood swings, where one day she is happy and is texting me about how great I am and that she loves me, and the next she is despondent and says that something feels off, that she needs me too much, and that i don't need her the same amount. \n\nLast week this led to the biggest fight we've ever had, where she accused me of spending too much time with my friends and that I was never with her when she needed me. Although I agree that I had been spending a lot of time with my friends, I had essentially only been with them when she was unavailable. We managed to resolve the disagreement, and she slept over on Friday and all seemed well. \n\nOn Monday (today) she began anew, and said that she tries to not need me all the time, but that she can't. I try to assure her that I do my best, and that I also want to be with her as much as possible, but she won't listen. It makes me feel as if she thinks I don't love her as much as I do, and it crushes me. Thank you all for any advice.", "summary": "Girlfriend thinks that I'm not with her enough, and seems to imply that I don't love her as much as she loves me."}
{"id": "t3_3u6ge6", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by making a prostitute joke", "post": "So this hapened literally yesterday so as I sit here on the toilet typing this I remember it like it was yesterday.\n\nSo in English we are reading a book and I was not paying very much attention. I was zoned out for a bit and when I zoned back in the first thing I heard was the phrase,\" Why did she tell her father she was a prostitue,' and the inner twelve year old in me blurted out,\" Family Discount?\" \n\nNow keep in mind that I said this very quietly and carefully so only my peers heard it. But them my dumb ass of a friend decided it was to funny to not repeat so he yelled for the whole class to hear,\" Family discount.\" Then of course the teacher heard. So when my friend was confronted by the teacher he told her that I was the one who originally said it like the dumb ass he is. Needless to say both of us have detention for a week and I am grounded from my computer for a month.", "summary": "Made a joke. friend repeated it, made me take the fallout 4 it and now i cant play fallout 4 for a month. "}
{"id": "t3_4i5sv4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (26) avoiding daiting in fear of hurting recent ( break up about 2 months ago) ex even more (dated six years)", "post": "Long story short I was in a relationship for 6 years. Unfortunately I fell out of love, the sex was no existent for the last year or two and overall it just want not a healthy relationship. \n\nAll that aside she still loved me and believed I was the one. She was completely blindsided by the break up ( she said she was but I tried talking about my issues and was never listened too, she must have seriously been in denial). \n\nIt's been 2 months since we broke up and I have been dabbling in the online daiting scene and there mutual interest with a few girls, one in particular. \n\nI'm afraid to pursue anything with her because of fear I would really destroy my ex. Even though I'm not romantically invested in my ex anymore I still care about her as a friend/person. Am I stupid for having these feelings and should I just grow the fuck up and do what makes me happy?", "summary": "I want to date after ending a 6 year relationship but I'm afraid of my ex finding out and being hurt more. Should I just do what makes me happy?"}
{"id": "t3_zfzlp", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "How to show my job history in the best light", "post": "Hello Reddit. My job history is good and bad. From 2003 to 2007 I was a retail store manager. Between mid 2007 and late 2009, I changed jobs a lot. I had an opiate addiction and it was hard to stay in a place too long, due to being so up and down. Things started to get better as I mentioned above (late 09) and I worked in finance from that date until a month or so ago.\n\nI was wondering if I should mention the other jobs at all, or focus on one or two others. If I do that though, how can I explain the gaps?\n\nI know it seems as if I am focusing on the length of time I have stayed at various jobs. However, I know how important that is, especially in full time roles.\n\nI would really appreciate some help with this matter. If you need further information, please ask.", "summary": "I started with a job where I stayed nearly four years, worked at four different places after for various lengths of time and stayed at my latest job nearly 3 years. Do I tell about the middle?"}
{"id": "t3_2oumkq", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I threatened to tell my friend's boyfriend that she doesnt like him and shes pissed.", "post": "So ive got a friend who is fat. Lets call him Mike. Me and a mutual friend make fun of this and often joke about him being gay with a second. We do this because we know hes ok with it and can take a joke. One time i took it too far and kept ripping into him and he took it badly. This was entirely my fault. He ended up bitching to my female friend, Jennifer (who i introduced him to) about how much of a horrible person i am. She started ignoring me and treating me like i had just drowned a million puppies. I got in an argument with her basically telling her to fuck off out of my business if shes got no stake in it, and then decided to threaten to show her boyfriend a screenshot she sent me basically saying she doesnt really want to be with him. She use the 'lol dont care' card for a bit and, although i considered it, i didnt show her boyfriend the message. I have a pretty shitty relationship with her and we both pretty much hate eachother 99% of the time. Mikes acting like it never happened and doesnt care, but Jennifers being a total bitch about it. What do i do?", "summary": "OP made fun of friend 1, friend 1 got offended and told friend 2, OP threatened to tell friend 2's boyfriend she doesnt like him, friend 2 hates OP, OP hates friend 2, OP and friend 1 are cool."}
{"id": "t3_3igq78", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21M] girlfriend [20F] of 1.5 years is not coming for my birthday. Should I be upset?", "post": "It's my birthday on monday and I wasn't sure I was going to have a party upto now, but am now having one on Sunday afternoon as it's easier for everyone to attend. The problem is that my SO's friend(Lets call her Jo) also has her birthday on monday and the Jo's boyfriend planned a party on Sunday for Jo. When I told my SO that I was going to have a party on Sunday and she confirmed that she couldn't make it, I tried to have it on Saturday but realised I have work that day and can't afford to take a day off.\n\n Her reaction to this was that she simply can't not go for Jo's birthday even though she would be meeting Jo the next day at Uni while I would have to go to work on my birthday and may not be able to plan something.\n\nI really don't want to start a fight or anything, but I don't know how to react to this. It feels like someone punched me in the gut and at the same time I feel like I'm behaving like a 5 year old about it. Help.", "summary": "SO is going to a friend's birthday party instead of mine. How do I react even though I feel like I'm behaving like a kid."}
{"id": "t3_s9871", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "how should i get this girl back to with her confidence, need to talk to her in 2 hours, SOS", "post": "I have been chatting with this girl (shes 20 and im 23) for 2 months, she had a close friend who is a guy that she is not in touch with now because he proposed her. Then came me, we were chatting casually and exchanged numbers, I haven't talked much to this girl. Right now she's so down with her confidence since she did bad in her academics and shes scared so much now. I talked to her in the morning but couldn't change her mood off, I am bad with handling emotions. She started saying that her friend only knows how to handle her and stuff, shes going to sleep now, me told I will be calling in the afternoon. Redditors, help this lad out what way can I get back to normal, tbh I don't know the how to!", "summary": "Need to get her back to normal, shes missing her guy friend now who would've handled the situation better. How should I react in 2 hours."}
{"id": "t3_u87hd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[21m] I have feelings for a girl[24f] thats in another country and dont know if i should pursue her or drown them out", "post": "I am a 20 year old guy turning 21 next week she is 24. Ive known her for 2 years now but we were always friends. We were always interested in the same things and even when she moved away we would play video games together to shoot the shit.\n\nShe moved away last year to vancouver to pursue her modeling career and we kept in touch. I talk to her 2-4 times a week on skype and we text eachother basically everyday. Recently we started talking about more serious things, previous relationships, sex, what we want in a partner etc. She is an extremely nice girl who has told me things that she says she hasnt told anybody else(most likely b/c talking over the internet is a lot easier than in person). i know with the way things are i cant see her and its stupid for it to be on my mind but for w/e reason she is constantly on my mind and idk if i should tell her anything.\n\nim not sure if she thinks we only friends or if she has a feeling that things are escalating as well but she tells me she has dreams with me in them and i remember feeling an immense amount of jealousy and sadness when she told me she had started dating a guy last fall but they have broken up since then. I get this feeling like she is my dream girl and to pass it up would be stupid of me BUT i know long distance almost never works. so now i dont know if i should bring my feelings up to her or if i should just drown them out. I appreciate everybody reading through my wall of text and thanks for any and all advice.", "summary": "i think i fell for a girl that i cant see in the foreseeable future and dont know if i should attempt to let my feelings known or just drown them out altogether"}
{"id": "t3_2uy9bm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my girlfriend [16 F] broke up after 1 year including 4 months in long distance, trying to move on.", "post": "So my (now ex) girlfriend dumped me a month and a half ago. She said she needed space and ignored me for a whole month (even thought after 1 week she told her bestfriends she had dumped me) and i had to wait that long for her to SEND ME a message saying it was over (kinda dick move). Anyways thats not the problem anymore. I want to move on because she also said she moved on. I still love her so much even thought I should probably hate her by now for what shes done. So far I told her I wouldnt talk to her for a while but its not enough, I see pics of her on fb going out and partying and shit like that and its reminding me how much i miss her. Its also not helping that if we had still been together Id be flying over to see her in a week for a few days especially since its valentines day, and her birthday. \n\nSo here is my final plan, I wana talk to her one of her friends and ask her to make sure shes alright and to make sure that my exgf understands why im cutting all ties with her (unfriend from fb, delete from skype/snapchat/instagram/messages) because she does have a \"hard\" time in life and sometimes get depressed, i just dont want to make her feel shittier even though i shouldnt care...\n\nI hope this makes sense, any thoughts?", "summary": "Want to move on from gf by cutting all ties/ asking her friends to make sure that exgf understands and will be fine, good idea?"}
{"id": "t3_553y1b", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome but I can't afford to lose this new job. Help!", "post": "(Sorry this is long, but I've done so much and I'm running out of options)\n\nSo I've had wrist pains for 3 years from typing and drawing. I'd take frequent breaks to stretch and rest and hand, invest in ergonomic equipment, stand when I work, align my desk ergonomically when I do sit, apply cold and hot wraps to my hand, taken ibuprofen, wear a hand brace at night and all day when I'm using my hand. \n\nThe pain has been manageable in the past, and I'm only 26. I'm fit, eat plenty of fruits and veggies, I don't drink or do any drugs. Not even prescription. No diseases or illnesses other than anxiety. As long as my hand gets rest, or I use my left hand whenever I can (the non dominant), the hand recovers fast.\n\nAfter being unemployed for months, I got this data entry job, which I was grateful for since someone with an art degree and social anxiety is not qualified for much else. Plus the 9-5 schedule allowed me to freelance art at night, my real passion.\n\nIt's been 2 weeks, and my right hand is in the worst pain it has ever been. Even with all of my methods listed above, my hand is constantly sore. My temp agency offers health insurance, but I'm not sure if I can afford it. Even if I had it, it would probably take months to get an appointment with a doctor. \n\nI'm terrified. I have some savings to get by for a few months, but I really don't want to lose this job, after struggling for months finding something that didn't give me panic attacks. But I don't want to damage my hand, either. What should I do?? I'm getting desperate, please help!", "summary": "26 year old stretches/does all the ergonomic jazz but still has CTS. I can't afford to quit my data entry job. Help"}
{"id": "t3_2xl3di", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A girl I've been seeing [25F] told me [24F] something yesterday and I'm not sure how to process it.", "post": "I've been seeing this girl for only a few weeks but we've been hanging out a lot/spent the night together last weekend and text frequently. It's been fun and romantic but I'm definitely a monogamous person at heart, so I've been just seeing her. I wouldn't expect the same, but I guess once we sleep together I'd hope for the same. Anyway, we were supposed to hang out last night and she texted me in the afternoon saying she slept with someone else and felt bad. I was upset (mostly just took a hit to my self esteem) but was really calm in my responses to her. I said I wasn't quite sure why she told me about it and she said it was because she was covered in bruises which made my stomach sink. She's definitely into rough sex and it just made me think, you're not telling me because you wanted to be honest with me as much as you wanted me to know you had good sex? Of course I didn't say that. It just kind of sucks to hear this. So I asked what she wanted with me and she said she wants to progress into a relationship eventually. But I feel like things just got incredibly weird between us. Am I overreacting by feeling upset by something when we never defined the relationship? Or is it sort of inappropriate for her to be telling me this? I can't really figure out where to go from here and I haven't responded to her since she said what she wanted. Any thoughts would be great.", "summary": "A girl I was dating told me she slept with someone else, with a little detail, and now I'm confused if she is someone I want to be with."}
{"id": "t3_djqqy", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have you ever accidentally injured someone?", "post": "One night while down at a party spot near a creek with some friends (we were all in high school), I pulled out some dog repellent I had found to show it off.  It got passed around and soon someone I knew said she was going to spray this other kid we didn't like so much.  Not wanting to cause serious trouble to him, I told her I would spray the back of his neck to show her how bad it hurt on just skin -- not the eyes or face.  I sneak up behind him and raise the bottle... when suddenly he turns his head slightly... right as I begin spraying the dog repellent.  It bounced off the inside of his glasses and hit his eye.  He let loose a howl and began dousing his eye with creek water, trying to flush out the chemicals.  A few days later I saw him in school and he told me that I had burned away 30% of his retina.", "summary": "I was going to spray the back of this kid's neck with dog repellent to show how bad it burns, but he turned at the wrong moment and it hit his eye.  I'm an asshole."}
{"id": "t3_1zrom6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] results with \"date\" with [19 F]", "post": "[Original Post](\n\nTurns out it wasn't a \"date\". So no-go on the physical contact/ kiss lol. So we met at the dining hall, she grabbed a booth, and we sat down and all. She then excused herself and invited a friend(male) to come sit with us who was sitting alone. Then a moment later, another friend of hers(girl) came to sit with us. I'm confused as to why she did this- instead of wondering why, getting back up and going back out there. Talked with her and her friends, but I distanced myself from the conversation thinking it would just be us two. The previous 3 dates it was just me and her, exception to one meeting on V-Day where her friend joined us for lunch. But anyway, First time dating a girl overall- first time ever in college, it's been good, gained some confidence and I could apply that to the next girl out there. No one said it was easy unfortunately. I'll keep the window open, but the chase with them ends. \n\n*Thought about it: might ask her where we stand, dating over a month, could be she might want me to get me to meet her friends?- I'm probably overreacting.", "summary": "Thought dinner with girl would be a date as with previous meetings, was not. Decided to stay optimistic and continue the search for other girls, throw girl on back burner, advice for the future to prevent this from happening?"}
{"id": "t3_2lbi7h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Both part of same group of friends, should I [21/M] tell her (20/F) I like her?", "post": "About a year ago I made friends with a group of about 6 people in college. We've become pretty close and we always find time to hang out even if we all study different careers in the same college.\n\nFast forward, a couple weeks ago, new semester, and I'm starting to hang out a lot more with one of the girls from the group since we are seeing a class together. I've started to like her a lot and i'm not sure if she likes me back, i get some mixed signals.\n\nSo, should I tell her how I feel? I wanna get to know her better and connect as more than friends. My fear is its gonna get akward when we are all togheter and I wouldn't want to loose her friendship and the general relationship I have with the group.\n\nWhat about asking her out and seeing her reaction? I really dont know the best course of action here.\n\nOnce this semester passes I'll start seeing her less each time and that's why I have to make a decision.\n\nI know this all sounds like a High School teenage problem, I guess I never burnt that phase properly in HS. Gotta start some time, right? :)\n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "Should I tell a girl I'm friends with, who is also part of my close group of friends, that I like her and wanna get to know her better?"}
{"id": "t3_pw0tb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, Please help. I need some advice for my dad on possible attorney extortion.", "post": "So I'll try to make this as short as possible.  My dad started a company the beginning of last year selling a bottle opener called \"MyTopOff.\" (www.mytopoff.com  it's hard to explain what it does)\n\nHe ran a few television commercials last year and didn't have much success.  He has been doing a bit of online marketing and hasn't broken even yet on his investment for getting this all started.  He even packs and ships this product from his own garage.\n\nThe commercial for the product says \"buy one get one free\", but there's extra postage on the second item.  This is pretty standard on most commercials, and before someone checks-out online it clearly states the extra fees for the shipping on the additional item.\n\nMy dad received notice for a case that was filed by an attorney out of New Jersey (name withheld by me) who filed a class-action lawsuit against my dad because of the \"deceptive\" advertising.  Upon further research my parents saw that this attorney files about 100 cases a year against companies for this same thing; usually settling out of court for large sums of money.  This attorney ordered the product with the intention of filing this case, and I'm assuming the attorney keeps all the money he collects.\n\nMy dad ended up calling the attorney, and the attorney said this can all \"go away\" for $15,000.   The problem is, my dad hasn't even made $1 on this product yet, and is struggling trying to get his business going.   He called a couple other attorneys about this, many of them know who this bad attorney is.  If my dad tried to fight it, it would cost him approximately $10,000, and then it's a gamble whether he will win or lose.\n\nDoes anyone have any advice on what plan of action my dad could take?  He's a great guy and this whole ordeal has been super upsetting for him.", "summary": "Dad sells product online with a start up business;  a con-artist attorney is filing a case against him for \"false advertising.\" Looking for advice."}
{"id": "t3_4nn1qe", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I messed up by auto renewing my lease. Need help making a decision [Housing]", "post": "Hello!\n\nI am currently renting an apartment in Philadelphia for 800 dollars and am planning to move out at the end of June (the end of my lease). Unfortunately, I made the great mistake of forgetting that there was a line in my lease that states it automatically renews unless I tell my landlord 60 days in advance that I will not be renewing. Instead I told him 45 days in advance. I was then told I am on the hook for another 12 months with an increase in rent (850) unless another person takes the lease.\n\n On the positive side, the real estate agency that works for my landlord is attempting to find a leaser now, but since the landlord wants 850 for the lease, it is proving a challenge for the agent to find someone. In the meantime, I've found a cheaper apartment including utilities down the street and already put a deposit down (685 for deposit + 345 for half month of rent). It should be noted that my current apartment is extremely expensive because of the inefficient heating (160/month in winter) and it's in a rundown old building.\n\nMy question is that if a person cannot be found for my current lease, does it make sense to lose my deposit at the other apartment complex and just stay at my current apartment? Or should I gamble that someone will be found by the agent in the next two weeks? Or should I pay a month of double rent in the hopes that someone takes the lease by the end of July. However, I cannot afford to pay the two leases at the same time for an extending period of time(poor, stupid grad student on loans).\n\nI understand that my woes are caused by my own mistake of not being aware of my own lease, but I am trying to rectify the situation now with your help. Thank you in advance, and please ask if you need more info.", "summary": "auto renewing lease. I'm on the hook for 12 more months in a crappy expensive apartment. Already put a deposit on new cheaper apartment. Should I lose deposit and stay at crappy apartment if someone cannot be found to take lease?"}
{"id": "t3_3xnrkx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[27 M] Was cheated on and am running out of ideas on how to recover", "post": "I was in a relationship with someone I really loved. We lived together and I thought we were very happy. I ended up finding out that she had a very personal relationship with another guy for months. I guy I knew about, but didn't know the extent of their relationship. They may or may not have hooked up, but to me, that didn't matter. She betrayed my trust, so I ended it with her and moved out.\n\nThis was almost a year ago, and I feel pathetic that I haven't gotten over it. I first tried to work on improving myself. I went to the gym every day, kept myself busy, and did a few activities I had been wanting to do. It was nice, but I was still upset about the break up. Not to sound arrogant, but I'm a social guy and above average looks. I tried to distract myself by going on constant dates. This helped a bit, but now I am about 4 months into dating someone (we are not exclusive) and I feel like we should start being exclusive. Unfortunately, I find myself incredibly untrustworthy of her for no real reason. \n\nI have always been very trusting of my partners (obviously to a fault) and I think that is the way a healthy relationship should be. I don't want to be constantly doubting my partner, but unfortunately, that is my reality. My question is, how do I get back to my trusting ways? I don't want to be this guy that I am right now.", "summary": "I was cheated on in my previous relationship, and now I can't bring myself to trust anyone I'm seeing. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3apjoc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (22F) husband (27M) keeps assuming how I'll react to a situation, despite my growth.", "post": "My husband and I have been married for three years. He's my best friend and a great man. However, there's one issue we cannot seem to work through.\n\nI've struggled with anger issues my entire life and it's been an uphill battle that I both acknowledge and strive to change. When my husband and I first got married I was still very young and immature and made a lot of mistakes as far as handling marital issues went. (Over dramatic, screaming, snooping, just all around crappy immature stuff.) \n\nMy husband addressed all above issues and over the years I have proactively changed for the better for both myself and for the sake of our relationship. I don't yell anymore, I don't snoop, I try to be understanding and give my husband the benefit of the doubt, ect.\n\nBut, now I feel he's taking advantage of my past mistakes and using it to benefit his own agenda. For example, my husband had to work late, like excessively late with a female coworker who I'm not too found of. Of course, without knowing he had to work late, I tried to figure out where he was and if he was okay. When he finally came home he basically told me that he didn't let me know he had to work late \"because he knew I'd get mad and he didn't want to deal with it.\" \n\nThat's basically the gist of his excuses any time I inquire or get upset, \"Well I didn't do X because I know you'll do Y\" despite me not showing signs of Y for over a year.\n\nI know that it takes time to adjust and to forgive and forget, but at this point being accused of behaviors I haven't exhibited in a LONG time without giving me the chance to show him that I have been able to progress just makes me want to act the way he's assuming I'm going to act. \n\nI'm at a loss. Please help!", "summary": "I've changed and my husband still treats me like I'm doing all the things wrong I used to do in the past. "}
{"id": "t3_2pkzlf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [29 F] unfriended my ex-bf [30 M] of 5 months, We're getting along well lately, should I \"friend\" him?", "post": "Things in our relationship were going well. And we had one fight and it ended. We didn't talk for 3 weeks. And then I decided to unfriend him. I didn't want to keep seeing his posts on fb. Ever since i unfriended him, he's been talk/texting me more often. And we've been friendly. We aren't dating and we aren't getting back together. I feel kind of immature to even ask this, but now that we are on speaking terms I want to add him again, but I feel that he'll see it as kind of childish that I am unfriending then re-friending him. \nShould I friend him?", "summary": "I've been getting along well with my ex lately, should I add him on fb again? or will it seem silly/childish?"}
{"id": "t3_thxwf", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "gf and I ended relationship..cant help but think i'm a bit upset she doesnt feel anything", "post": "me (19m) and her (19f) recently ended our relationship of 10 months on grounds that she didnt think our relationship was \"going anywhere\"\n\nand honestly, I feel pretty upset cause I can't get past the feeling that even though she said I treated her \"perfectly and would be an idiot to break up\", she seems like she doesn't really give a shit about it. to her friends she says she isn't heartbroken, she's glad to be free and she hasnt even thought about it. I don't know, I guess it just hurts to think that even though she thought our relationship was great that she can just drop it that quickly\n\nis there more to it? she's a normally very stoic and emotionally guarded girl, so I feel like it may not be all there..and I know it really shouldn't matter to me this much, but it's my first relationship and I guess it's just shocking how little of a shit she is coming off as giving", "summary": "girlfriend and I broke up after a 10 month relationship, i'm a bit shocked at the lack of emotion she's showed..need help trying to overcome thoughts I guess"}
{"id": "t3_3933lj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [M19] make my girlfriend [F20] believe that I didn't cheat on her? Her friend is lying.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for 18 months and I love her. I have only ever had sex with my girlfriend and I would never cheat on her. Ever. \n\nOne of her friends has always disliked me, we just don't get along very well. A week ago she told my girlfriend that she saw me kissing a girl at a party before taking her to bed. Another friend of hers is backing up the claim. I wasn't even at the party that they say it happened at, I was at home studying. I don't know why they would make this up. My girlfriend believes them and I don't know what to do. I tried to talk to her friend and she just subtly smirks at me like some deranged psychopath and calls me a \"disgusting pig.\"\n\nWhen she confronted me I held her hands, looked her in the eye and told her that I didn't do it but she didn't believe me. She thinks I'm a liar. It really hurts that she believes two of her friends over me, but I do understand. I'm really not sure how I can make her believe me. I would absolutely never do this. If I can get her to believe me and trust me, I think this will just make us stronger as a couple. But as it stands right now, she is refusing to talk to me. I really don't know what to do. This is a woman that I am thinking about spending my life with. How can I get her to believe me?", "summary": "How can I [M19] make my girlfriend [F20] believe that I didn't cheat on her? Her friend is lying."}
{"id": "t3_3duclh", "subreddit": "running", "title": "My first truly terrible run", "post": "Last night I experienced my first ever absolutely miserable run where instead of feeling energized and accomplished when it was over, I lay on my bathroom floor shivering and hugging the toilet. \n\nI have had frustrating runs before and I have had runs when my knee/ankle/toe hurt and made me want to quit but last night was far worse than any of those. \n\nEarlier in the day, I ate a sandwich and fell asleep on the couch for a two hour surprise nap. When I woke up my stomach was slightly unsettled like I was about to have heartburn. I decided to do out for my long run anyways because I always have heartburn and it doesn't usually stop me. This run was scheduled to be my longest yet at 1:30:00 (I am training for a half).\n\nAt about 45 minutes I started to get stomach cramps so I slowed how much water I was taking in. The entire run I had to walk several times which is unusual for me but my times were better than expected so I thought I was just pushing too hard and tried to take it easy on the way back. \n\nMy post long run ritual is usually to drink several long drinks once I get back to the car since now I won't be jostling my innards around, I can do what I want. When I got home, I felt like I probably shouldn't try eating right away so I had about 1/3 bottle of Gatorade. \n\nWell...Gatorade was the wrong answer. Within 20 minutes I was violently heaving into my kitchen garbage and I lost all of the Gatorade and likely most of the water I had while running. \n\nMy question is, do I blame my sandwich from earlier or my run? I am worried that 1:30:00 is my limit. I haven't considered quitting my half marathon training until now because everything up to this point has been fine.", "summary": "I went on a long run only to come home and violently throw up and now I am hesitant to continue my training."}
{"id": "t3_3ihwg8", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "[TIFU] by getting a med card and overdosing on marijuana or \"greening out\"", "post": "Well Reddit, I fucked up big time. I overdosed on THC. Which is found in marijuana.\n\n I was with two other friends, we will call them Kolin and Matt (not real names), and we were all having a good time at Matt's new beach house. Matt has his medical marijuana card, and I asked him how since he seemed to be in perfect health. He told me he had tendinitis in his knees which gave him chronic pain. I did too and he told me that we could go get my card if I had $40 cash. We go to a small clinic where I filled out a paper listing my symptoms and reasons for my visit. Told the doctor about my aches and pains and he gave me a sealed and verified med card for $40 cash. So we were able to go into dispensaries and pick up stuff legally. It felt pretty surreal. We grab some cash and head to the nearest dispensary a few blocks away. Since it was my first time at the dispensary I had to fill out a user agreement. We buy 2 \"Dark Chocolate\" edibles for $30 bucks, and each bar contains 4x the dose of a normal serving of marijuana. Before heading to the pier that night, Matt and I decide to eat our edibles. Yea the whole thing at one time. It took about 30-45 minutes for me to get high, but when it came I got hit buy a brick wall. I broke out in a cold sweat, and I struggled to survive. We decided to walk to the nearest fast food restaurant which happened to be Carl's Jr.\nI sit down and time flies slow as hell. I remember going into third person and feeling the vomit crawl out of my stomach. I threw up four times on my way to their restroom. I was hallucinating traps around me, and I could barely get out two words at a time without my brain stopping itself from further processing. If it weren't for Kolin looking out for me, I would not have made it last night. Anyone at the beach could have simply asked me for my wallet and I would have given it to them. I was that fucked up.\n\n[TIFU] by getting a med card and overdosing on marijuana or \"greening out\"", "summary": "Got my med card, bought an edible with 4x the dose of THC per individual, and I experienced hallucinations. I also vomited 4 times at a Carl's Jr."}
{"id": "t3_2nm9vg", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Had a Girl Over - Missed Opportunity?", "post": "There's a girl that I've liked for awhile that today I had over. Was almost positive she was interested, heard a lot of things from her and others that said it. She came over and I shared Pulp Fiction with her. We ended up holding hands, but that's all, and being stupid, I mentioned another guy in school a lot of people thought she had a thing with. Though we're meeting in the morning to head to school together and have agreed to a lunch in the future, after mentioning the other guy and seeing other weird signals when flirting strongly, not sure where to take it, what she's thinking and what my next move should be. Help?", "summary": "Crush who I've heard say a lot about me was over, I made a conversation error and almost no move (excluding have lunch with her and meeting her in the morning) not sure how its looking."}
{"id": "t3_1784dw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have proof that my mom is cheating on my stepdad. What do I do?", "post": "So my mom has brought a lot of men into my life. Finally she seemed to have settled down. She has been married to my stepdad for 2 1/2 years now and recently started a new business. I noticed she became \"friends\" with the owner of one of the businesses that she does work for. She has been really sketchy ever since. constantly texting him and is on the phone with him more than she even talks to my stepdad. My stepdad works hard and often has to work out of town. When he is gone my mom will randomly disappear for 3-4 hours saying she went out with friends. When I ask her what friends she answers \"just a few friends from work\" I know this is bullshit because I saw a text message to the guy when my mom was texting him that said \"I can't wait to see you\". Now tonight I saw a message on her facebook from him saying \"I love you\" to which she replied, \"I love you more.\" I know that I should say something to her. The trouble comes here. My brother and sister both know and would be on my side. However if they said anything my mom would probably kick them out. If I said something my mom could make me go live with my dad. or even worse my mom could get divorced and move in with this new guy, who is a total cunt by the way. Even worse is that my stepdad has 2 kids who I have become really close with and I would hate to see what they would have to go through.", "summary": "Mom is cheating. Don't know how to go about saying anything because too many people could be affected negatively by me saying something."}
{"id": "t3_ucngw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How to start walking after 20 weeks of Non Weight Bearing. Advice please.", "post": "Here's the situation; I broke my Fibula (outside bone), tore two ligaments & damaged cartilage as well. I had surgery a week after the injury, Plate & 5 screws were inserted, cartilage filled in with silicone & Ligament sewn back together, additional 6th screw was inserted to hold the two bones together. After 14 weeks I had another surgery to remove that 6th screw as the Ligaments healed. I am now 6 weeks after the second surgery, was supposed to see the doc tomorrow but he had an emergency & rescheduled for next week, so I hereby turn to you Redditors (where else) for advice on how to start walking, I was told that I can start walking (couldn't talk to Doc, only secretary).\nI've seen all advice from people who were NWB for 6 weeks, I'm really looking for advice from people who have been closer to 20 weeks like myself. I've started putting pressure just yesterday & it's surprisingly painless (just pressure), still wearing Aircast (Doc said not to remove when walking).\nHow much pressure can I put?\nShould I throw away 1 crutch if I can bear it with only one?\nShould I get a cane already?\nwhat exercise is good?", "summary": "I've been NWB for 20 weeks after ankle injury/surgery, I'd like advice on how to start walking again."}
{"id": "t3_1gpof7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "x-post from r/deadbedrooms: Had dead bedroom, turned out GF was cheating [m/f 20]", "post": "I have been with my gf for six years now. The last couple of months we have had a kind of dead bedroom, with sex maybe 2-3 times a month (I know that this isn't exactly dead, so I'm not sure I'm entitled to complain). We didn't live together, and we both had hectic days so I guessed that this was the reason for our lack of sex. Three weeks ago we moved together. This was big for me. I thought that now we could start working on our dead bedroom. Unfortunately we only had sex one time the first week. I just thought that was because she was stressed out. So was I. The next week she got her period, so that kind of killed the sex part.\n\nSo, yesterday she was really sad. And I asked what was wrong. She then confessed to me that she had been having an affair with her friend. She haven't told me how long this has been happening, but it seems like it has been going on for a while.\n\nThe worst thing is that I was sickly jealous at her friend. And I was really paranoid that there was something going on. So I confronted her, but she told me that I didn't need to worry. So I felt really bad that I was this paranoid and jealous guy, that couldn't let her have a guy friend. So, I guess my suspicions was right the whole time.\n\nI don't know what to do yet. We have just moved together, and there will be hell to move out again. We have both been living with our parents, and there's no turning back now. I don't know if she's gonna quit seeing her friend, and I don't know if we're going to try to make this work. I know I can't forgive her for what she did, and I'm not sure I can just forget and put it behind me either.\n\nSo, do anybody have any tips? Been in a similar situation? And is it even possible to fix this kind of thing? Anything goes, I just need some perspective.", "summary": "Had kind of dead bedroom. Moved together. Thought this would be a start to fixing things. She tells me that she has been cheating on me for a while. Don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_3p89d9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my new GF [26 F] maybe not interested in me?", "post": "Im dating a new girl who never dated anyone before.  She lives in my apartments and we get along great, have same interests,etc.  She never tries to pay for things when we go out or ask me about myself. Most of the time I listen to her talk on and on. I ask her questions but she doesnt ever seem interested in me.....more like she wants to talk and feel special....and like shes interested in a free meal. I know shes new to relationships and this isnt my first rodeo.... unsure of what to do. In prior relationships I would wait on the girl to ask if we could do something and then let her pay for that to even the bounds... this seems way too convenient for her. Im finding this difficult because she lives in my apartment complex so there is no physical boundary. Oh and weve been dating for seven weeks. We go out a few times a week and I pay each time.", "summary": "new relationship with no distance boundaries and she seems interested in talking about herself and going out.....but maybe not interested in me and with me paying for going out activities."}
{"id": "t3_53cbi6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] boyfriend [21M] of 5 years works too much and does not have time to spend with me", "post": "I have bluntly communicated to him several times that I would like to see him more than once per week for two hours. He said he would try to make more time for me but it has not happened yet (I've talked to him twice in a three month period). We've been together five years, and I recently graduated from college and found a job. He literally works everyday and when he's not working he'll hang out with his brother or his friends to smoke weed. I don't smoke anymore, and I don't care if he does but I'm hurt that he barely finds time to spend with me. I don't even text or call to ask him to hang out because he'll usually say he's busy working. I know he's busy and throughout the week I'm busy with work too but we rarely talk. He'll probably send a text every so often, but we usually go 4-5 days without talking. Whenever we do hang out it has to be convenient for him and it's not fair to me. He works at out former high school's garden and does yard work for people which I can understand takes up a lot of time, but then again I don't. Sometimes the one day I do get to hang out with him, he'll cancel if someone calls and I'll be left at dinner/movie theater/wherever alone. I just feel like I'm not wanted and I wonder if I would just be better off single. I just want to re-establish the affection that used to be in the relationship; I feel like it's lacking. I've even told him I feel like I'm not wanted and he says, \"It's not that, I'm just busy\". I understand working and making money, but working EVERYDAY? I'm sorry I'm ranting, I just have no one to talk to this about. Thank you for reading my rant.", "summary": "boyfriend of five years works everyday and does not make much time for me even though I've tried to communicate with him about it. Do not feel wanted in relationship anymore."}
{"id": "t3_1mew6i", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/m] It's been 8 months and I'm still not over her...", "post": "Background: When I was 15 I developed a crush on one of my school friends but since I was really shy and didn't want to ruin our friendship I just left it and hoped the feelings would go, 2 years down the line I still have a crush on her so I finally decide to ask her out, she says yes and we stay together for a good 6 months with no real problem. \n\nAt this point in the relationship I fully believe that I'm in love with her, however in January of this year she broke up with me. At first I wasn't too affected by it as I had pretty much expected it by the way she was acting, I thought this meant that I was over her but gradually over the months I started to care more and more until it was all I could think about.\n\n2 months ago I decided it was time to talk to her and apologise for my behaviour that possibly led to our break up, she said everything was fine and that it's all in the past and we haven't spoken since. \nNow I really don't know what to do, I think I'm still in love with her but I know she's over me, I want to be friends with her but it would be very awkward between us (plus I hate her friends), I want to meet someone else but the only girls I know are friends from my secondary school and one girl in my college class.", "summary": "Had crush on friend, friend became girlfriend, fell in love with girlfriend, girlfriend became ex, still in love with ex, ex is over me, what do"}
{"id": "t3_uuhja", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Cautionary tale about minimalist shoes", "post": "I've had a busted MCL ( for about ten years. This just means when i step on a crooked piece of sidewalk my kneecap dislocates. Fortunately, running in a straight line on a road is a safe activity, so about two years ago I started getting into running. It's now been over a year since my kneecap has dislocated, because I strengthened all the muscles around it so much. That's the good story.\n\nThe bad story? I did it in Nike frees. I had problems with my feet that lead me to choose those shoes. Suddenly, in February, my right IT band went. And I was done. I couldn't run 500 feet. I didn't get it, my left knee was awesome. I had slowly increased my mileage, up to only 4 miles a day. my perfect mid-foot strike and wear pattern on the sole of my frees left me bewildered.\n\n Everyone uses minimalist shoes these days, so it couldn't be that, right? \nWRONG. Turns out that 100% of the problem was the minimalist shoe. Last week I got new shoes and was humiliated as I purchased the chunkiest, ugliest old fashioned sneakers on the advice of the shoe specialist. Now I run on what feels like big fluffy cushions, but my knees haven't even twinged.\n\nWhen I started posting about this issue a lot of people who were ex-runners because of their IT band told me it was hopeless. I hope they see this post and try cushioned shoes.", "summary": "don't start with minimalist shoes or you won't be able to see their effects. Also, if you have knee problems in the first place, don't do minimalist! Even with 12 miles a week they can damage you."}
{"id": "t3_3bcfwz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M/19], a college student, have found myself in a summer class with a girl [F/19] whom I've had a HUGE crush on for years.", "post": "A bit about me: I'm a college student and am taking a couple of summer classes at a nearby college. I'm a very easy-going guy, but I also have severe anxiety. Hence, I'm extremely nervous about everything, including this situation and don't quite know how to approach it. If I knew how to (and that's why I'm asking for help), I would feel a lot better about it.  \n  \nA bit about her: She attends a college very close to mine (as in a 5 minute drive). I have liked her from a distance for a while. How do I know her? Well, she is a good friend of a female friend of mine (we all attended the same high school and are now in college). However, we've never really talked, but as stated in the title, we now have a class together over the summer. In fact, she is my lab partner in the lab I'm taking. To me, it's a golden opportunity to get to know and possibly try to start a relationship with someone I've been crushing on for years. She's very sweet and fairly quiet. \n \nAlso, a dilemma I'm facing: She is a member of a very Christian community, and many members of said community don't really date. For this reason, I would like to take things very slowly in order to avoid an early rejection (especially considering we're lab partners), I'd like to take this slowly. I am Christian as well, but not as conservatively as she is. The lab only lasts for a month, though, so I don't have a lot of time to work with before school begins again. How would I approach this?", "summary": "I am taking a summer class with a girl I've had a crush on for years and I'm seeking advice about how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_525cw8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My long-time friend [26/m] and I [26/m] seem to be drifting.", "post": "Hey everyone,\n\nIf you are inclined to check my post history you might noticed that this is a time of transition for me in terms of friends, family, university and self-awareness. In this post I'm particularly concerned about a long-term friend of mine who I have known for 13 years. \n\nI've always known him as the type to hide his emotions and explode periodically and this was something I would occasionally have to deal with but otherwise our friendship was fine because we were in school together and shared many of the same hobbies.\n\nAfter high school, I went into a science program and he went into a technical certificate program for an oil related career. He also had an emotionally abusive girlfriend, which always bothered me because he is a great guy. \n\nI feel as though his ex really did a number on him emotionally and he is much more prone to anger than when I met him, add the fact that oil has tanked and I can see that he is under a lot of stress.\n\nSomething happened to his political views since getting a career in oil. Money reigns supreme, other people can suck it basically - I don't mean to rip on anyone here who feels that way but the way I see it is that he has become much colder during this period. \n\nOne thing that really shocked me recently was when we were chatting about a Chinese fellow I introduced him too. Not sure how he got this idea but apparently the Chinese guy hates white people (most of his friends are white) and is ungrateful because white people taught him martial arts (his Chinese dad did) and white people gave him everything that he has right now. Until this point, I thought he was just grumpy about the economy - didn't know he has become a racist. \n\nI think this is a signal that I should start to distance myself from him.\n\nIf this has happened to you, how did you deal with it? Thanks everyone", "summary": "As time goes on, friend and I share less in common and are generally less friendly as we once were. Might be time to move on."}
{"id": "t3_4kny4u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my GF [22 F] got into a fight about not having enough arguments. Suggestions?", "post": "She got angry over me not arguing with her. She says I'm like a robot. For context sake I argued back that saying that  is dismissing my feelings like of the time I told her I used to be bullied in 4th grade. \n\nUsually I talk to her relaxed, but she kept driving the point how angry she was for over an hour that I thought I d try to be angry as well and brought up the point about her talking shit/gossip about people, and eventually I mentioned without thinking that her sister's boyfriend made a good impression on me not considering that he appears to beat her. That I don't approve of, but I said good night instead and she just hung up cursing under her breath. \n\nShe wanted an argument and got one, but now our relationship is probably in pieces. This is why there shouldn't be two people angry at the same time. I want to apologize first, but how do I apologize and lessen her anger without sounding like a pushover?", "summary": "Girlfriend is angry why I don't complain about anything, as if I don't trust her with my secrets. I do complain to her and the situation spirals out. How to mend"}
{"id": "t3_2ecfa0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] with my friend [16 F] I can't tell if she's flirting or just joking around", "post": "So I just started at a new high school in a new state, and for the first couple days I was pretty lonely until this girl came up to me and offered to help with some summer homework that I knew nothing about but still had to do.\n\nAt first we only talked on facebook, and it was only about school stuff but over a couple days we started to talk a ton, about everything. Since then we've been together at school nearly all the time, and hardly are ever apart.\n\nI really like her, but I can't tell if she likes me back. The texts she sends seem pretty flirty, she trolls me alot because I'm new and sort of almost makes fun of me in a joking way, and she also wanted to know about any of my past relationships. \n\nToday during lunch she walked off to talk to some of her friends, and I was just standing with another group of her girl friends. One of them told me \"there goes [name]\" and winked at me and laughed. I think it's pretty obvious that I like her, but I don't really know what her doing that meant. Also, another one of her friends said I should take her to homecoming and that we would make a \"really cute couple\".\n\nI just can't tell with her, and I really don't want to ask her and only be rejected and have our friendship ended. I really respect her and I don't want to put her on the spot like that.", "summary": "I'm getting mixed messages from the girl I like, her friends all want me to ask her out, and I'm really unsure of what to do."}
{"id": "t3_3buq6u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "New to job [25 F] and in a hostile work environment with multiple co workers", "post": "I am working at my first corporate job straight out of uni. I have less than 4 months working in a demanding public sector agency. The environment is great and everyone is easygoing. My workplace has all \"the babies\" (mid-20/mid-30 year olds). However, I can't help but notice that some people have been condescending towards me at times.\n\nI have a very playful, child-like persona, that's my personality and also a coping method to handle stress. I admit that *I don't always* know when people get irked by me and I can be hard to be around.\n\nHowever, some of my peers have been acting very disrespectfully and condescending to me. I get backhanded answers and under the breath comments.\n\nJust the other day, I was approached to do a task that I had a new procedure and I was unfamiliar about. When asking the people who were more knowledgable, Person #1 of them tried explaining in a way that didn't make sense to me. I asked for him to simplify and he snapped at me with a vague response that got me nowhere. It took Person #2 to calmly break it down for me. Still, I did was stare at Person #1 with a raised eyebrow in anger. I didn't know how to react to it but I knew I didn't appreciate the way he answered to me. \n\nOther times, I just happen to say the wrong things to those who don't like me or don't know how I am. I got that a lot as a kid that has been bullied and whatnot, but I'm getting pretty old for that.\n\nMy question to you, reddit, is should I approach people when I am being talked down upon? How about when I am being to chummy? Should I acknowledge that I passed the limit.\n\nThis is my first real job, so I'm fairly new to this. Appreciate your help!", "summary": "Post-grad in her first real job in public sector. People treat me badly bc I'm kinda of an oddball+fairly new and still learning+don't know how to stand up for myself in a corporate setting. "}
{"id": "t3_x1cx1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My SO broke my trust.  How can we fix our relationship?", "post": "I don't really want to go into details, but I (23F) have severe trust issues and my SO (22M) shattered all the trust I had in him.  We're at the point where I can't believe anything he says if there could possibly be an ulterior motive.  Would a no-privacy policy help, or just make me more paranoid?  Any other suggestions?", "summary": "SO lied to me to be with other people.  I feel hurt and can no longer trust him, but I do believe he loves me and I want to continue the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_3onvcx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(24/m) let social media make me paranoid about infidelity in my relationship. Am I crazy?!", "post": "I am new to Reddit so someone please correct me if this is an inappropriate post, or should be directed somewhere else. \nI was just wondering how many redditers out there have had social media apps have a negative affect on your relationship. \nWe all know how easy Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram have made it to keep in touch with people near and afar, but it also seems like these outlets are often being used for many different kinds of infidelity, the most common being emotional infidelity, which often leads to physical infidelity. \nI have read a few articles that connect the use of Facebook to raising divorce rates. Unfortunately I don't think that the problem lies with social media sites, but with human nature. Facebook and everything else out there has just made it easier and more temping for those that struggle with monogamy or commitment. \nSo my question is how often are you bothered by friends and followers of your SO? If your SO has developed a new relationship with someone the need to meet in person or even speak over the phone to help your new found friendship flourish is no longer needed, all you need is your Facebook messenger. These virtual realities of ours while being so open to the public are also very private at the same time, it's an interesting virtual paradox. Do you find it appropriate to talk to your SO about their virtual friends? \nIt's one thing to have an outing on the town with mutual friends or a night in playing games, it's an entirely different thing to have people who you only really associate with through social media. What is the purpose, are they there to spill emotional baggage too, are the on the back burner being warmed up for a rebound? \nAfter dealing with infidelity a number of times in my life I would like to know how people in serious relationships are dealing with social media, and how, why, or why not it is having an affect on your relationship.", "summary": "How do you deal with social media in your relationship, does it make you paranoid ever. If so what do you do?"}
{"id": "t3_vevar", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have a job interview tomorrow and came across some disheartening information - any advice?", "post": "I am applying for a job with a well regarded firm in DC, and while reading online reviews of the place with pros and cons I was coming across stuff that would be familiar to any office - cons were office politics, an old-boys culture among the senior staff, etc. Then I found an entry stating that the place tends to take stock in those who stay latest - is this something that would disqualify me in an interview if I asked about it? I always hear horror stories from people who have to stay until 11 pm at their office jobs even if they have nothing to do just so it appears as if they are working hard and I am trying not to get caught in that culture.", "summary": "Company cares about who stays latest, would the interviewers disqualify me for asking if it was something that was true?"}
{"id": "t3_txrl5", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU: Probably buried my turtle alive", "post": "At least, today I found out I fucked up.\nLast year, my 10-year-old sister and I found a very young box turtle at my uncle's house. We figured it probably would have got eaten by one of the million animals that eats baby turtles, so we took it home. We kept it for a long time, but it didn't seem very healthy - we probably didn't take very good care of it, and I don't think we even got it the right food, because it refused to eat for some reason. After a long time of it not seeming healthy, it just stopped moving. Guessing it had passed away, we had a cute little funeral for it, and buried it (deep) in the backyard. Well, today I found out box turtles hibernate.", "summary": "thought my sister's turtle was dead, we buried it, turns out it was probably hibernating and I killed it."}
{"id": "t3_2suop7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [M/18] long distance girlfriend [F/17] is in a really bad position at home and we can't see a reasonable way out of it.", "post": "Alright, so i live in England, and she lives in Wales. I'm on my final year of college and then i'm going to find a job, that's as far as my plans go for now. She is on her final year of college, and when she finishes the course she'll be able to move to England in September to go to University. Seems simple enough, right? Just wait out the day until she can get here.\n\nNope. Her mother has a death grip on her. She's still forced to do chores, gets her phone and laptop taken off her when she makes small mistakes doing said chores (got grounded for a week for going upstairs for 10 minutes leaving the dog alone, for example). She's not allowed to visit me, and her mother has pretty much just taken everything off her because she hinted at it earlier, so now i'm in the dark about life over there for the time being. We both want her to just leave and move up here with me, which i'm completely fine with, but she **has** to stay and wait out these 8 months to finish her course. If it wasn't for that, she'd probably already be here with me.\n\nI can't see a way out of this so i figured i'd come here and see if anyone has an idea. I don't think social services is the way forward because there's no proper abuse, she's just being treated like a toddler instead of a young adult. I can understand some of her mother's concerns, it sure seems like i could just be some 40 year old paedophile, but even when i'm not in the question she just throws her weight around as an authority figure, takes things and dishes out punishment when she feels like it. I can't figure out any way at all to help, and moving down to Wales is not an option due to my own college course.\n\nAnyone got some ideas for me? This whole situation feels hopeless.", "summary": "Girlfriend's mother is a psycho who punishes her for the stupidest reasons, and my girlfriend has no way out of the household without giving up her college course."}
{"id": "t3_xz2nd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My GF is insecure in my fidelity to her. How can I reassure her?", "post": "My GF (21f) and I (21m) have been dating for about half a year now. Prior I had bumped around a series of unsuccessful or short-lived relationships, which she is fully aware of as we were friends before dating. Meanwhile, she had been in a relationship with her childhood best friend since she was 17 or so. Unfortunately for her, he apparently cheated on her not once but twice. I'm not totally clear on the details, but I think there were a few other relationships somewhere along the way for her which had similar issues, though they weren't sexual. \n\nAnyways, since I've started dating her everything has been amazing. Really. I love her totally, she loves me, we both want similar things in life, amazing sex life, and great communication. \n\nBoth due to her prior BF's infidelity and her own personal challenges though (history of eating disorder) she occasionally has pretty obvious insecurities about me. A major factor in this is that I had (well before our relationship) slept with one of my best friends, which i was honest about but she nonetheless friends threatening. On the other hand it clearly extends beyond that though. I went on a vacation with my aunt for a few days and when I got back my GF was upset that I hadn't emailed her for a day.\n\nI can totally understand why anyone would be skeptical of their relatively new BF after someone who had been with her so long still abused her trust twice. And since we only started dating like a month after they broke up this is all fairly recent. It would probably take me way longer to get over something like that.\n\nFrom my narrow perspective though it is frustrating being implicitly accused of future infidelity because of some random guy I've never met. I'd like to improve her personal confidence so that she can trust me more.", "summary": "My GF got cheated on repeatedly, has issues trusting me. How can I help her build her self esteem and trust me more?"}
{"id": "t3_2qigsr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (25f) ask my boyfriend (27M) of 2 years about his stance on marriage?", "post": "I want to talk to my boyfriend about marriage **but not about getting married**. I just want to know where he stands on the subject.\n\nWe've never talked about realtionship goals before or what we want for the future. So I was completely caught off guard after he said that we would be engaged if he \"cared\" for marriage. He then continued \"that we were better off without\", and when initailly asked why all he talked about was his only married friend's wife and how he doesn't like her. \n\nI want to bring up the subject again, but I don't know how to go about it. I don't want to make it seem like I'm upset, because I'm not. Obviously, I know he's not for marriage, but the reason he gave for why makes no sense to me. I want a more logical answer so I know what to expect out of our relationship.", "summary": "wants to ask bf what his view of marriage is, tried already after *he* brought it up, but all he talked about was a friend's wife "}
{"id": "t3_2wpnal", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not locking the door to my flat", "post": "This was a couple of years ago, approaching Christmas in 2012. I had a really bad habit of not locking the door to my flat, and had the idea that it might bite me in the arse one day.\n\nSo it was a Wednesday night, student night and me and the girlfriend were lying in bed. We could hear some goings on in the corridor but thought nothing of it really, it sounded like somebody had come back drunk and was having trouble getting into their flat. Eventually we hear a door close, it sounded quite close. The girlfriend turns to me and asks was it ours. I was sure it wasn't and so we ignored it.\n\nNext thing we know, a girl wearing just a t-shirt and knickers walks into our bedroom. I jump out of bed and instruct her to leave, she instructs us to leave claiming that it's her flat. She then leaves our room and uses our toilet. (At this point I'm like, wtf I do?). Being a gentleman, I wait for her to finish her business, then tell her again to leave, block her from entering our kitchen/living room, she gets confrontational, and me, not wanting to touch that, do nothing to stop her going in there. Try a bit more to get her to leave, then call the police cause girl wearing next to nothing and clearly drunk is not a thing I want to tackle.\n\nMe and the girlfriend then spend some time waiting for the police to arrive, in the meantime this girl eats some of the lunch I left out for taking to work, drinks some of my rum, then throws up all over the blinds. The police arrived a couple of hours later. I was left to clean up her sick.", "summary": "Left door unlocked, drunk girl ate my lunch, drank my rum, puked on my blinds, didn't even get a threesome out of it."}
{"id": "t3_3x1qo1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21m] with my [20f] gf. Lately I have felt like we aren't right for eachother and that I should end it. I don't think I'm capable of ending it.", "post": "Me and Jess have been together for almost 4 years now (obligatory fake name). But anyways, as of lately I haven't felt nearly the same about Jess as I ever have. \n\nWe have had a few problems in the past. Including her cheating on me and me cheating on her. I fingered a girl when I was on vacation my senior year and she had sex with a random guy she met through her work. My cheating happened before hers. In fact, hers happened over two years later. I don't we've been the same since.  \n\nI've been having urges to be with other girls. I know this is a normal thing even for long term relationships, but I feel like this is different. I don't even feel guilty about it anymore. I almost wish she would give me a reason to break up with her so I could. \n\nWhen I think about breaking up with her.. I just think twice about it and I can never find the right time to do it. I feel like I'm overly attached to her and I'm scared of being alone. But at the same time I just want to be single and have the freedom to just to what I want. \n\nLast thing to add here. We really don't have anything in common. Like NOTHING. The only things she talks about is basically things that she needs to vent about. Almost every other sentence that comes out of her mouth is a complaint about something and it's driving me nuts. I don't mind talking about a bad day that you had like that's understandable, but she will complain about the most mundane things that most people would just forget about after they happened. It's overall stressful for me to even humor it.\n\nI don't know how to approach this situation properly. I'm at a loss.\n\nReddit please help.", "summary": "been with girlfriend for over 3 years. Don't wanna be in the relationship anymore, but can't end it. Help."}
{"id": "t3_36nrq2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (22m) girlfriend (22f) had an abusive ex boyfriend (22m) who is now dating someone else (22f) that i sort of know and has been abusive towards her as well. I would like to do something to help but i dont know what i can do.", "post": "Ive been dating my girlfriend for about a year now and I love her alot. Her highschool boyfriend was extremely abusive and controlling which ranged anywhere from choking to the point of passing out to very emotional and manipulative mental abuse. My girlfriend and i have worked through alot of those issues but she is still very much afraid of him. \n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \n     It took a while for my girlfriend to open up to me about it and she still has not told her family about it. I really do try my best but sometimes it is very hard to know what to say in alot of situations. We all go to the same college and he has been dating one of my friends ex girlfriends for a while and still has been exhibiting abusive behavior and according to numerous accounts has been hitting her and really become even more controlling. \n\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I know thats to a certain point its really none of my business but I know this other girl well enough to know that shes a kind person. It really makes me so mad thinking about him getting away with it. And i really wish there was something that i could do about it. Ive weighed out all the options and think that my best course of action would be an anonymous letter to her parents. I dont know what would happen though. This guy is a real piece of shit and i just dont know what to do. Is it even alright to get involved?\u00a0 \n\n\u00a0(Throwaway because my username is too similar to my name)", "summary": "girlfriends abusive ex is now dating a friend of a friend and has been abusive towards her as well. I really want to do something about it but dont want to get too involved."}
{"id": "t3_20v4j2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16 M] with my girlfriend [16 F] dated for 1 month broke up 2 days ago", "post": "my brother had been dating his girlfriend for several months when the girlfriend's sister starts to text me. We text back and forth for two months before i get up the courage to ask her out(on the beach i might add). \n\nThen three weeks into our relationship my brother and his girlfriend broke up. She said that he couldn't be her first priority right now and that wasn't fair to him. Then the next week my girlfriend comes to me wanting to breakup saying she cant provide for my needs and she wants to breakup. She was like \"nothing is going to change and we can still be friends\" bullshit is what i thought. \n\nThis left me completely confused as she had not shown any signs of wanting to breakup and she hadn't told me of any problems in our relationship. But I was wondering if it was because of what her sister had done and if she did it just because of her (they do most everything together). I don't know if i am over thinking this because it was my first relationship or not but it left me extremely confused and sad/lonely. I used to text her all of the time and now she wont text me back and its making me depressed.", "summary": "Asked out girl i had been texting with for two months, her sister broke up with my brother then she broke up with me within a week."}
{"id": "t3_1e152p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20M] think my girlfriend [19F] might be planning to go back to her ex", "post": "I'm [20] concerned. I've been in a relationship with this girl [19] closing in on two years now. We've been happy the entire time, but of late she's been bringing up a known ex of her's quite frequently and with more affection than necessary.\n\nNow, let's get the story of the ex straight. He damaged her, socially and mentally, she has told me he was the worst thing that ever happened and \"a fucking idiot\" many times. He still pops into conversation ever now and then since he's now dating a common acquaintance of ours.\n\nOf late, however, she's been mentioning him much more and with far greater detail - at least in terms of what he is up to. I'm fine with her chatting to him but not anything more (he's across country, and we are at varsity together) but she hadn't done so for close to 6 months.\n\nSo, she tells me the other day he had contacted her out of the blue again. He says he's breaking up with the acquaintance and needs advice on how to move forward, telling my gf his problems etc. She told me this, and I was again fine with it as I thought that was as far as it extended. It wasn't. They had had an hours long, intensive discussion as if he'd never left and never hurt her. She was responding to his obvious flirtation encouraging remarks - even going so far as calling him \"the light at the end of this tunnel [semester]\" and other remarks indicating they intend to meet up (which they haven't done since almost before we started dating). I should mention that I was goofing around on her phone when I found the thread, it wasn't intentional.\n\nHonestly, I've had thoughts about a break up recently. I'd like your thoughts as to whether it's simply those notions making this hurt all the more raw, or do I actually have something to worry about here?\n\nI'm confronting her tomorrow about it . What do I do? Am I overreacting?", "summary": "Girlfriend has begun intensively chatting with her supposedly hated ex again, I've already had twinges thinking about a possible break up, is it a concern or am I being too uptight."}
{"id": "t3_x2t46", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Lost that \"spark\", and now my marriage is in trouble", "post": "I've never done this before, but in truth i dont have anyone i can talk to. My husband and i have been married for 4 years, together for 5. At the beginning, we were so close. Even when we werent together, we were close. We managed to get through a 6-month deployment for him less than a month after we got together.\n\nOver the years, something has changed. We're not intimate at all, no sex, no cuddling, no time just spent \"together\". We go off and do our own thing and we've basically become friends who share a bed. We talked last night and he says he still feels that \"spark\" for me.\n\nI dont.\n\nOur relationship is complicated by the following things:\n\n- Im schizophrenic and quite often he has to basically take care of me because im too depressed/ psychotic to look after myself. This has put him in a kind of carer role.\n- We live in the US and im originally from England. I have no family and only one non-online friend over here. I dont go out, i dont socialize, he really is all i have over here.\n\n-I take so many psych meds for the schizo that even when the mind is vaguely willing for sex, the body is absolutely not. I cant remember the last time i got genuinely horny.\n\nBecause of my illness, i closed myself off, stopped opening up. I still dont open up very much although im working on it. I've become this walled-off person and i have no idea how to get that spark back. I dont want to lose my marriage, but im scared that's how it will go if we cant fix this. \n\nAny advice would be awesome, im really lost.", "summary": "I've lost that \"spark\" due to being mentally ill and various other things, need to get it back."}
{"id": "t3_29ew11", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20 M] love my girlfriend of 5 years [20 F] but think I am falling for my best friend!", "post": "I need help!\n\nCurrently, I am living together with my girlfriend of 5 years and 6 months. I still love her. Deeply. Sharing my life with her is fun, and has always been beautiful. We reached adulthood together and after graduating school we decided to move in together to study in two close cities.\nBut with the start of university I met new people and one girl in particular sparked my interest. \n\nToday, after 8 months of studying and living together with my gf, I am best friends with this particular girl. We laugh a lot and spend a lot of time together, even outside of university. I often thought about, if I am starting to feel more for her than just friendship but quickly buried these thoughts whenever they came up...\nBut I want to, or atleast try to be completly honest with myself and I definetly feel attracted toward her. Both sexually as well as emotionally.\n\nThen, a few days ago we were at her place studying together like we often do, for the upcoming tests. We chatted for a bit and she admitted that she fell in love with me and had a crush on me since the beginning of the degree course. Vice versa I admitted that I DO have feelings for her but that I do not love her and instead love the relationship I currently have and want to keep.\nShe was devastated (never had a boyfriend, hoped for more etc...) and I soothed her. We came each other closer than before and suddenly kissed for a brief moment...\n\nI do not know what to do or think since then... :(\nI feel like I am in love with two persons at the same time and I can not and simply do not want to decide myself for either side.\nI feel so lost and alone in my own thoughts. I do not know what the right decision is. \nAlso, I feel bad and unfaithful. I never wanted to cheat (even if it was just a kiss) on my girlfriend. She does not deserve this. \nBut I can not forget the other girl since then. Maybe I reallly fell in love with her.", "summary": "I currently feel like I am in love with two persons (my first gf of over 5 years and my best friend) at the same time. I do not know what to do and how to make a decision."}
{"id": "t3_3gavg4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What does it mean when a guy doesn't really reply back to you?", "post": "I met this guy online about a little over a month ago. I'm 19 and he's 26. We hit it off immediately, especially after figuring out that we come from the same background and religion. We talked for some time before meeting up in person, and during the entire duration of speaking he never mentioned anything sexual, but was being very nice and interested. After we met up the first time, we hit it off amazingly in person, and later in the night there were some sexual activities that occurred (besides actual sex). The week after, he came over to my place and we actually did it, and we went on a third date recently and things were going really well. Every time after we'd meet up, he'd text me telling me he had a great time, and that we should plan something else soon. But in between the periods of where we meet in person, he hardly replies back to my texts (once about 6-10 hours). Once he finally does, he gives a nice long reply/somewhat flirty reply, but the fact that he barely replies but in person seems to have a great time with me and always wants to make plans confuses me as to where his head is at. Also, if I ever don't reply to his text, he texts back a day or two later asking how I am etc. \n\nI'm just confused as to what this guy may want, whether it's just something short term or long term. Also, the fact that he ignores my texts so much inevitably makes ME think about him more than i'd like to, but do you guys have any advice as to what I should be doing? \n\nThanks in advance.", "summary": "Guy keeps taking forever to reply to my texts, but seems to have a great time in person and always wants to meet up. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_l68j8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My girlfriend faints/seizes and the doctors don't know what it is.  Doctors of Reddit, do you? (details inside)", "post": "(throwaway account, and sorry if this is the wrong subreddit).\n\nShe told me she had a history of fainting, and yesterday I saw it first-hand, and it was terrifying.\n\nWe had just taken a 2-hour car ride, and upon getting out of the car, she complained of feeling a \"head rush\" and leaned against the car.  She then tensed up, stumbled and fall ever, and started having what I can only describe as a seizure: eyes glazed over, arms/body tensed, twitching on the ground.  It lasted 5-10 seconds, and during that time she was completely unresponsive.  Then almost immediately afterward, she sat up, asked for some water, and seemed almost completely back to her normal self. She said that she had \"blacked out\" and remembered nothing between complaining of the head-rush and waking up on the ground.\n\nHISTORY: apparently this started happening to her when she was in her early teens, usually after standing up after a period of inactivity.  More recently, it's been linked to times when she's had a strenuous workout or been otherwise dehydrated.  She says happens about 2-3 times a year.  When she was younger, the doctors said it was because she was growing and \"didn't have enough blood in her system.\"  Now, they don't have any idea why it's happening.  \n\nDoctors (and/or med-students) of Reddit, what is this?  If I see it happening, what can I do to make sure she doesn't hurt herself?  Is there anything she can do to prevent it from happening?", "summary": "my girlfriend faints/seizes, and the doctors don't know why.  Seems to be linked to dehydration and/or standing up too quickly.  What is this and what can I do to help her?"}
{"id": "t3_1j6kjk", "subreddit": "pettyrevenge", "title": "Haha, now you have to use your keys.", "post": "So I'll start by saying there are two doors that you need to go through to enter my apartment building. They're both heavy and the door inside the hallway needs a key and is hard to open sometimes. Generally if I see someone coming I'll either hold that door open or if they're that awkward distance away I'll very obviously close the door gently so that the latch doesn't lock and they don't need to mess with their keys.\n\n^(Seriously I've broken 3 key chains trying to open this door with one hand because of how heavy it is.)\n\nWell anyway, I tend to go out for coffee around the same time every day, which often coincides with when this one woman is returning home. I'll open the inner door and hold it open for her and she'll just push past me without a word, often bumping into me without so much as a look back of apology. \n\nToday when I saw her crossing the street to the entrance of the building with her phone in hand and shopping bag in other, I locked eyes with her and just let the inner door slip out of my hand with a very obvious gesture. It slammed shut and I nudged it with my foot (out of her line of sight) just to make sure it locked. She gave me the most incredulous look and it was *I* who finally got to nudge her out of the way as I exited the building.", "summary": "rude woman thinks I'll just hold the door open for her every day without her saying thank you and today I did not."}
{"id": "t3_t96u3", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Married 7 years. Just bumped into ex. Please prevent me from making a colossal mistake...", "post": "OK, here we go. Wind back the clock 10 years. \"N\" just dumped me after a series of falling outs. Turns out she'd been seeing \"J\" on the sly through a friends of friends thing; i.e. no physical contact, but both fancied the pants of each other. To her credit, she dumped me before laying a finger on him.\n\nI'm now married, as is she. No kids to complicate things.\n\nI was visiting the office next to hers (it turns out) and completely randomly bumped into her as she was heading out for lunch. Shock / surprise / awe all around and we go to a nearby coffee bar to get lunch & catch up.\n\nSo... long story short... we got along like a house on fire. It was as though we'd never broken up. We're talking long, lingering looks. Sly smiles. Random hand on knee action. The whole lot. Every feeling I ever had for her returned in a heartbeat; I'm pretty sure the feeling was mutual. We finished up lunch, had an awkward peck-on-the-cheek and agreed to be in touch \"soon\". She gave me her cellphone number (she tapped it into my phone).\n\nMy sensible side tells me I'm being an idiot and the \"fuck around with the ex\" effect is kicking in. and I mean in a sexual way; you know \"friends with benefits\" and all that. On the other hand, I don't think I ever got over her and all sorts of rekindling has just happened. I think it might be mutual.\n\nI'm fucked-up Reddit. I think I just need to delete the number and bury these phoenix feelings. What do you think?", "summary": "Met with ex. Still fancy the ass of her. Think feeling is mutual. We're both married to other people. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_q9qqt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I live in Montreal Quebec. I have been accused of rape at my college about 9 years ago. I got expelled with no appeal and have not gotten over it since. How do I get justice?", "post": "After the success of this post: \n\nI have built enough courage to ask Reddit for some advice. \n\nAbout 9 years ago a young girl was confused and thought it would be therapeutic to tell our college that I assaulted and raped her. There was a shooting in our school a few month back and I guess they just expelled me with no trial or appeal.\n\nI wasn't the best student (I had aspergers and was going through a lot) and really going through a lot. I shouldn't have been in school but the whole thing through my life even deeper. \n\nAfter years I re approached the school (about 2 years ago) and brought a mountain of evidence to clear my name. They kicked me out of the school and refused to speak to me or give me my appeal.\n\nDuring this time I approached the accuser and she openly admitted to going through some stuff and lying to them. I have this confession as a recording. \n\nI feel I have enough proof/evidence to sue either the women or the school but I am too 'weak' and 'battle worn' to really do anything about it.\n\nI often ask my friends to help me call a lawyer but no one has come through. Maybe Reddit can?", "summary": "I was accused of rape and expelled with out a trial at my college. I have hard proof that she lied and no idea how to do anything about it. "}
{"id": "t3_vje0z", "subreddit": "Pets", "title": "Please help with an unusual flea infestation!!", "post": "Hey reddit, I am starting to get desperate with this infestation of fleas that I have going on in my parents' basement. I am house-sitting for them while they are on vacation and taking care of their parrots. Let me explain why this infestation is so weird.\n\nMy parents have 2 dogs that are on the best flea medication that they can get and the dogs 100% do NOT have fleas, the fleas are localized only to the basement, where the dogs don't go (in fact, the dogs aren't even here right now). The fleas are in the basement, where my parents keep 4 eclectus parrots and 2 cockatoos that I am watching while they are away. \n\nThe basement is unfinished-- there is NO carpet down there, but there is an old sofa located near the birds' cages, but we have flea-bombed the basement twice before my parents left for vacation and the fleas have not been killed. What is unusual is that fleas don't usually (and aren't as far as I know) feed on parrots, so the parrots are not serving as a host for them. \n\nI am going directly from my parents' place to my girlfriend's when they return from their trip, and she has a cat that is not on any flea medication. I am trying to make absolutely sure that her cat does not get fleas from me. I have absolutely no idea how the fleas are still alive downstairs, but I want to try and kill them off. Flea-bombing is dangerous to the birds and we have to take them all out of the basement for several hours when we do it, and I can't do that alone, so I am trying to find a way to kill the fleas that is not harmful to the birds and doesn't require me to move them from the basement (because I can't).", "summary": "Does anyone have any suggestions of how to kill fleas without harming or moving the parrots? There is no carpet downstairs, no furniture besides a sofa, and the basement has been flea bombed twice."}
{"id": "t3_3bnq01", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I[23F] be turned off by dates' lesser intelligence? Do I need to be taken down a few notches?", "post": "Hi r/relationships, long time lurker, first time throwaway.\n\nSo here's the deal. I'm a pretty smart chick, never taken an IQ test, but I know I'd be in the \"above average\" percentile. I've been in accelerated learning/honors/gifted programs since 3rd grade, graduated highschool with a 4.2 GPA, got a full academic scholarship to my top choice university, graduated uni with a 4.0 GPA and internship/job offers. I read constantly and my vocabulary is noticeably larger than my peers.\n\nAs a side note; I know in some instances I can be arrogant about my intelligence. I also have an overabundance of confidence. I've come to terms with this, as it's kind of a byproduct of being in separate accelerated classes my whole academic career. But that's a different post.\n\nMy question is should I be turned off by guys--namely potential romantic partners--who are obviously of lesser intelligence than I am? I work in the tech industry so finding guys of equal to higher intelligence isn't too challenging, but finding smarty dudes who also have good social skills can be an issue. Should I keep my standards high? Or should I give a guy who's a sweetheart but not necessarily on par with my brains a chance?", "summary": "I'm a smarty chick who struggles with dating guys who can't compete with my intelligence. Am I right to write them off? Tell me if I'm an asshole!"}
{"id": "t3_39awhj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is my girlfriend unreasonably controlling? [18M & 18F]", "post": "Alright, so I have quite a few things that have been a problem in my relationship that I havn't been able to workout with my SO.\n\nSome back story. We've been dating for over a year and recently (3 months ago) we moved in and this is when all of these problems became very prominent. \n\nFirst off I used to enjoy responsibly smoking cannabis and sometimes drinking with a few of my friends once or twice a week. By responsibly i mean we'd stay in the house, no driving, no hard liquor allowed, not allowed to do anything reckless which was enforced by all of us. Most nights consisted of playing smash Bros on the wii or watching animation domination. Nothing bad or reckless.\n\nTo my girlfriend this is absolutely the worst and scumiest thing to do and thinks all of them are low lifes. There is no compromising on me smoking or drinking. End of story.\n\nAnother thing is, we have sex regularly once every other day or so. But occasionally she will completely lose interest for anywhere from a few days to over a week. Now this is fine with me, everyone has different sex drives and that's alright. But it recently got brought to attention that she does not like me masturbating during our dry spells and porn is completely out of the question and so are nudes.", "summary": "my girlfriend tries to control the parts of my life that I enjoy most. I love her but not really sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2w9i7o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22F] with my boyfriend [22M] (5 months). Told my friends an embarrassing story (about him) that happened 3 years before we actually started dating.", "post": "I've been dating my boyfriend for 5 months (we are both in our senior year of college). We both love each other and besides small communication issues, we get along great. But I feel guilty about things\n\nWe met during our freshman year. We flirted with each other for one week before we kinda hooked up. The night that we almost hooked up ended horribly, in a very embarrassing way for the both of us. I broke off things two days later and for the next three years, we didn't talk/acknowledge each other. After the incident, I told about 5-7 of my close friends the story of my almost hookup. \n\nAnyways, three years later, we meet up again through Facebook and we realize that we were still very attracted to each other. Now we're together. My problem though is should I tell my boyfriend that I told my friends the story of our hookup? \n\nThe people that know it was boyfriend who I hooked up with are my best close friends and I told them if they told him they know that I would stop being friends with them. I told them the story because a) I was extremely embarrassed and it helped to talk about it and b) I never thought that we would meet up later in our lives. I was wondering if I should tell my boyfriend that I told my friends this story? He's sensitive about the issue that is involved in the story and I don't want to unnecessarily hurt him but I always feel guilty about it and feel like he should know.", "summary": "Should I tell my boyfriend that I told my friends the embarrassing hookup story that happened 3 years before we actually dated?"}
{"id": "t3_2ugybp", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Writing here so I don't talk to him", "post": "I'm out of a 3-year relationship with the love of my life. We have been on and off more times than I can count. It just doesn't work. We love each other fiercely. But apparently that doesn't mean we can be together. In all of my Disney, Nicolas Sparks, doe-eyed optimism, even I have come to accept we will never work together. \n\nHe has moved across the country, which I'm grateful for. It means we can stop self destructing by seeing each other every time we're feeling weak.  We agreed to no contact because it's just going to be excruciating for one or both of us to attempt a friendship and then eventually find out the other is moving on with someone else.\n\nHe was my best friend. I miss him so much. He loves football. I hate it. I want to talk to him about the superbowl and how I was forced to watch it with my coworkers. I want to tell him about my insane cat that he couldn't stand, and how he's become crazier somehow. I want to tell him about how I cried during a sad puppy commercial but not a child-abuse commercial because he knows my heart is made to love animals, and I don't have that same soft spot for people. I ache for him every fucking day. It's only been a week. What the fuck am I supposed to do? I feel like I'm dying.", "summary": "This is me talking to you instead of texting him, so thank you for existing. Even if nobody reads this....I didn't text him. I got it out here. That's a good step I guess."}
{"id": "t3_27izay", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "What's best for me?", "post": "Hi /r/loseit! I am an 18 year old man, currently at 220~ pounds. I have been with a girl for almost a year long distance, and in 2 months (August 13th) I will be flying out to Minnesota to stay with her for two weeks. Its going to be the biggest moment of my life, and I want to look my best.\n\nLong story short, I am looking to lose as much weight as possible in these short two-months (unrealistic goal is 30-40lbs, but happy with anything). I don't have trouble losing weight necessarily, I just need motivation like this to get me started. I've been dieting for about a week now, since we booked the flights (it was a surprise birthday present). I work a very physical job so I don't believe exercise to be necessary at this point, but I am willing to cut calories to any amount, eat any food, buy any program... anything it takes. \n\nFor the last week, I've been consuming roughly 500 calories a day which I know is terrible. I haven't been hungry at all and I posses none of the cravings I used to. This happens everytime I attempt to lose weight, then I end up gaining again eventually. I realize quick and fast weight loss is NOT the most healthy or best way to go about doing things but I'm looking for a jump start. After we meet, I'll feel more confident about starting a manageable long term diet that will leave me as skinny, happy, and healthy as I would like.", "summary": "looking to lose as much weight as possible in 2 1/2 months by any means necessary. Interested in long-term healthy dieting after that!"}
{"id": "t3_o2cs3", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Trying to move forward after the kiss.", "post": "Okay so this is a throwaway account. But I really need some help. Theres a girl and we have been good friends for about over a year now. Nothing more then friends, anyways she is really good looking and I want to start talking to her but don't know how to start it or whatever. About a week before new years we were at a party and we were just together as friends nothing really, the thought about trying with her didn't really cross my mind until my friend and her friends asked me if i was going to kiss her. By the end of the night I had made up my mind, grabbed her away from the party and finally kissed her. After we finished she said this was always going to happen. I don't really know what she meant by that and i am a little confused. I've tried texting her but i haven't really gotten many replies or enthusiasm. Definitely need help where to go next.", "summary": "Finally kissed the girl, she said it was always going to happen, she has gone a little cold but not to much and need help to get further."}
{"id": "t3_upxmd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My cat was stolen yesterday. Is there anything I can I do to get her back?", "post": "Ok Reddit, here's my sketchy story. I've been living in the same apartment for almost three years with the same asshole downstairs neighbors(mother and daughter in 60s and 30s). A little over a year ago, a stray cat started coming around our building, we knew right away she wasn't ferrel because of how friendly she was. My roommate and I have grown to LOVE this cat. We, along with my downstairs and other neighbors, kept her fed. My roommate and I would sometimes let her in on cold nights, and it was always our deck she chose to sleep on when she was outside. We had food and water bowls, toys, etc. We would have kept her inside however she always wanted out after a while and she also had fleas and ear mites. Anyway, TWO days ago my roommate was approached and informed by downstairs that they were calling a \"friends for felines\"(?) place that would take her and have her treated and brought back when they were done. I thought, \"oh how nice, now we can let her sleep inside!\"...a day later(yesterday), we were again approached by downstairs saying that \"last night a woman from a few buildings over came up to me looking for her cat\"...yeah. So, with that being said, as far as I know this random woman(who claims it's her cat) picked the cat up and is taking her to Petco tomorrow to be adopted. Am I the only one who finds something wrong with this story? This woman lives not even a 2 minute walk away, hasn't even been worried/looking for her cat for over a YEAR, but now wants it back, just so she could have it adopted at Petco? I'm at a loss.. I'm so heartbroken and don't have the money to pay for adoption fees and vet bills. Help reddit!!  What can I do?", "summary": "I've fed an outside cat for over a year, fell in love with her, and yesterday somebody claiming to be the owner took her away and is bringing her to Petco tomorrow to put her up for adoption. "}
{"id": "t3_vjcmp", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by breaking a 3yo backyard jungle gym swing set", "post": "Last night was one of my best friend's birthday parties. I'm in the backyard and a couple of my friends go out front to smoke and I stay behind with one other guy. After talking for a bit my eye catches a wooden jungle gym complete with 4 swings and a big slide in the side part of the backyard. I ask the guy I'm with if he wants to go over to see it and reminisce about our childhoods. \n\nWe head over there and I take a seat on one of the swings and he on the opposite one WITHOUT SWINGING, just sitting there. Also, we both way around 165 pounds each, which isn't really that heavy. I say to him \"I used to have one just like this when I was a kid,\" and right after the support beam holding up the swings snaps in half and the swing set collapses.\n\nNeedless to say, I felt awful and my friend was pissed when he saw it but got over it quickly because he is nice like that. I still offered to help fix it or pay for a new one, but he told me not to worry about it. After telling his parents this morning, he texted me saying that they weren't at all mad and wanted to get rid of it for a while anyways, so I kind of did him a favor. But when his 3 yo brother saw it, he burst out crying and was extremely upset, understandably so. \n\nI still feel bad about it even though his family is OK about it. I think his and his parents reactions were worse than mine, not caring about the 3 yo being heartbroken by this, but that may just be my subconscious trying to make me feel better. What do you think reddit?", "summary": "Sat on swing, collapsed jungle gym, 3yo in tears but rest of family doesn't care, feel guilty but am wondering if family is worse than me for not caring about 3yo's pains."}
{"id": "t3_2jb7kh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My family ratted me out for cheating on my gf", "post": "Before I start im 23 years old (male), my girlfriend is 23 (female), and so is my cousin (female). I've been dating my gf for a year and I cheated on her 6 months ago with a one night stand. We all lived together in a house, but since this both of them moved out.\n\nI'm going to try and make this is short and sweet as possible. I'm having some trouble in my life right now, mainly with my cousin who I use to live with and recently moved out.\n\nHere's how all of this happened. Me and my gf live in our own place with a spare bedroom. Come August of this year my cousin needed a place to live so I allowed her to move in. Time goes on and she starts becoming best friends with my gf. Time goes on and me and my gf are about to go on our one year anniversary trip. Before this trip im out of town and my cousin and gf are partying together. My cousin tells her I cheated on her 5 months ago and proceeds to move out the following week. Now this whole time they tried to play me and act like someone else spilled the beans but I always knew it was her. Anyways now I have evidence of my cousin selling me out, what should I do? I haven't said anything yet and she still thinks I don't know.\n\nShould I bitch her out and never speak to her again or should I forgive her. I did this girl a favor and she ended up stabbing me in the back I personally don't think I ever want to speak to her again, but I'm on here to make sure I'm not crazy.", "summary": "my cousin who lives with me and my gf told my gf I cheated on her and moved out. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_g6n2z", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Anybody else with Aspergers/Autism find it hard to do 'simple' social things? I need really quick advice for a social situation.", "post": "I have Asperger's. Basically I overreact when things I planned don't go as planned. \n\nI've been having trouble in my life, because I do not have a job or go to school currently. I live by myself.  I have way too much free time and I'm not keeping as busy as I should. I'm in a smalltown newfoundland. It's pretty isolated and friendships are few. Managed to make friends with a few people. \n\nThe problem is, that I'm having a panic attack because my friend can never visit me for more than an hour. It's a 'friends with benefits' situation so I probably have strong emotions for him too. Anxiety (and other factors) prevents me from being around him and his partner. So I don't see him as often as I know I should.", "summary": "my plans didnt work out and I don't want to spend the weekend by myself depressed and anxious again. Just phoned friend and got really upset when he said he can only come over for an hour."}
{"id": "t3_3in048", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] want to get back with my ex [22 F] 2 years, were still friends after the breakup", "post": "This is like those songs about the girl who left and the guys all depressed and wants her back. We used to talk everyday, hold hands, laugh and smile with each other. To me this was the most I ever felt connected to someone, never felt like this in my past serious relationships and I was happy to be with her. She goes to school long distance but she visits me, and I visit her for long periods of time. forward it to the last few months, we argue sometimes and she goes to korea for a month. When we talk she said she wants to risk things and breaks up with me. We talk a week later and she said she just came up with it at that time.\n\nThrough the week I felt depressed, I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep. When I went to work I couldn't talk, I quit my hobbies and cried daily. Now we're friends and the way she talks to me hurts me more. I don't know why she's doing this but it seems like she wants to move on. All my feelings are still strong, but when I talk to her, it feels like she's ready to move on. I never pushed anything on her when we talked, and I don't know what to do honestly. I love her and i'm depressed, she made me happy and now i'm a mess.", "summary": "Gf breaks up with me on split decision, when we talk as friends it feels like she's moved on and I can't do much being long distance."}
{"id": "t3_uejp1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "In highschool my first love left me for my best friend. Reddit, how have your friends back-stabbed you?", "post": "I dated my \"first love\" in High School during a very turbulent period in my life. I came out to my family as bisexual, and had come out to my friends as transgendered. My girlfriend then was super supportive. She called me by my new name, and she she immediately used all the right pronouns. She encouraged me in the face of adversity.\n\nThen it just ends. I get home from a short trip abroad, and she breaks up with me. She says she just doesn't love me anymore, and that's just all there is to it. I am crushed.\n\nSo I am dealing with all of this when my best friend at the time tells me he needs to ask me something. Turns out he wants my permission to start dating her. This isn't months or years later, mind you, its only a few days. Wanting to be a good friend, I say yes. A mistake on my part.\n\nIt kills me to see them together. He takes her out to do dates that I never did because she told me she hated it (nights on the town doing nothing but walking around, for example). Within a week they are officially dating. Its senior year of High School and I just lost my two best friends to each other.\n\nAnd then the clincher to it all. He convinces her that me being trans is just an act I do for attention. She, for whatever reason, believes him over me suddenly. So I am suddenly without my two best friends, and my safety net for all the insecurities that I deal with in only recently having come out to people.\n\nYears later, and I am with an amazing woman who accepts me for the girl I am, and those two broke up in what I understand was quite a messy breakup.\n\nSo Reddit, how have your friends stabbed you in the back?", "summary": "Had a girlfriend that was support. Lost her to my bestfriend in a period of 7 days. She became unsupportive and judgmental. Also something about raptors."}
{"id": "t3_154qqz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "We have been on one date and now she [18] is asking me [20] to go to San Francisco with her and her parents (we live in Sacramento), but I'm not sure if I feel comfortable with that yet.", "post": "We have been talking for about 2 years, mainly through texting, and I felt like I knew her pretty well. This had been almost exclusively a friends relationship until last Sunday, when we went on our first date. It went well, and we ended up making out towards the end of it in my car. This was actually the first time I had made out with anyone, so it was pretty special. On Monday, we talked about it and she told me she had never been with someone who was so passionate and caring, which was great. We even made plans for this coming Sunday to see a movie together. \n\nThen, yesterday, she asked me a lot of questions, starting with stuff like \"What type of women are you in to?\" and \"What turns you on\", then it started changing into \"What do you want to do when you graduate\" and \"How many children do you want?\" I answered all her questions and we talked for a long time about each of them, and I even asked her them back. I didn't really think much of it until she asked me to go to San Francisco with her instead of seeing a movie nearby. This is the moment I realized that maybe she thought we were farther along into a relationship than I did. To be honest, she's a great person, and I know she only wants a person who cares about her (she comes from a pretty broken family), but I don't know if I am ready. This all is going so quickly! \n\nReddit, please help me decide what to do in this situation. I don't want to hurt or offend her, but I'm not sure if I am ready for this level of commitment, if that's what she is suggesting.", "summary": "I am not even in a relationship with this girl, yet she's asking me to do a lot of stuff I am not comfortable with yet.****"}
{"id": "t3_1vv8eg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21/M] With [18/F] dated for 4 years. We recently broke up a month ago and I can't stop having dreams about her.", "post": "Well the dreams started about a week after the break-up. I've been having them atleast once a week sometimes twice since. I can't really recall what the other ones were about but they have never been sexual. She's always just there.\n\nThe one I had last night that is still fresh on my mind was probably the strangest. It didn't even look like her, her hair was a different color, and she was wearing alot of makeup. It's was hard to recognize her but I still knew it was her though. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't get her attention beyond a \"hey\".", "summary": "What do these dreams mean and how can I stop having them? They are making me more depressed than I already am."}
{"id": "t3_423lfq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20F] boyfriend [20M] didn't say anything when his friend [18M] disrespected me. Am I the one in the wrong?", "post": "Simple story, my boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years, we were friends in high school, and we live together. He has a friend that he plays League with. I sometimes play with them, too, because I love my boyfriend and he wanted to play with me.\n\nHis friend (not my friend, his friend) called me a bitch today. I was immediately annoyed, muted him, and my boyfriend didn't say a thing. I told him then and there not to let somebody disrespect me like that. He didn't say anything for the rest of the game. We finished the game, I ignored him. I didn't know what to say or how to say it without seeing red.\n\nAbout 30 minutes ago, I told him again not to let someone disrespect me like that, and he said he didn't think it was a big deal, because his friend was joking. \n\nI don't give a fuck if his friend was joking or not, I don't like that and my boyfriend (who claims to love me) shouldn't either. He's been defending his friend that he's known for less than a year, and not even trying to see my side or apologize. I'm still angry as hell, so I cant tell if I'm overreacting or if I'm in the right. Please help.", "summary": "boyfriend let his friend call me a bitch, didn't say anything, defended him without trying to understand my feelings. help."}
{"id": "t3_3wa4eh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by making the secretary think I'm a drug dealer", "post": "This happened today. A few classes ago.\n\nI was in video production class, me and my friend were filming stuff for a project. \n\nAll of a sudden, my teacher gives me some sort of sugar pills (don't know the name exactly), and she asked me to give them to the nurse due to them being expired. I agreed and went over to the office.\n\nI went into the office, with whatever the fuck in my hand. I enter the office, and see my friend ,and fellow reddit user u/SteelCasedCondom, working there, as office aid is a class here. \n\nThis is where I fucked up.\n\nI hand him the parcel, and I tell him that it was from my teacher, and he handed it to the main secretary, see looked at me with a weird look, and I again, say that its from my teacher. She asks for my name, so I comply. \n\nAbout 10 minutes later, my before mentioned friends tells me that they are quite suspicious that I, a student, handed some sugar pills to the office, and that they are gonna contact the nurse and pull me on for questioning.\nRight after he said that, he gets questioned by the office as to what my name was and if I was in class. I panicked. And after third period, they announce my name on the loudspeaker and pulled me in.\n\nI explained the whole story to the secretary, and she immediately apologized for the ordeal and misunderstanding. And that I'm all good, but next time, to get written permission from the teacher to relieve any assumptions.\n\nDon't take pills to the office for your teacher. It'll be so awkward coming into that class tomorrow..", "summary": "Teacher asked me to give diabetic sugar pills to the office, made the office think I was some sort of drug dealer."}
{"id": "t3_39cmih", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My sister[35f] told me[29m] and my mom[61f] that her kids[4f] [7m] aren't her husband's[36m]", "post": "My sister told me and my mom (dad passed away) that her children aren't her husband's. And not only that but her children are both from an exboyfriend that she keeps in contact with. She has even gone out to do a paternity tests to confirm it. \n\nSince our nephew has been little everyone has noticed that some things didn't add up looks wise, but I just chalked it up not being able to tell what little kids look like. Now that I hear this, I don't know what to do. My mom said to just shut up about the whole matter, that my sister's exboyfriend is no good for the kids, and that her husband makes a fine father, and what he doesn't know won't hurt him. \n\nPersonally I think the whole situation is completely messed up and that if I was the husband in the situation, I would definitely want to know the kids I were raising were mine or not. My sister and mom don't feel the same. A part of me wants to tell him or at least hint to him, but I fear that will end the relationship between me and my sister and my nephews.", "summary": "sister came over was crying her eyes out and stressed out. She admitted to my mom and me that her children aren't her husband's. I want to tell the husband, family members disagree."}
{"id": "t3_53s6z3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my Boyfriend[21M] of 5 years. Haven't heard from him in a couple days.", "post": "Me and my boyfriend live about an hour and a half apart, he moved last year for work. I plan on moving with him once I'm done with school. \n\nWe talk every day, have had relatively few issues, and have talked about marriage. That's what makes this whole thing so scary. It's been 4 days since I have heard anything from him. He has a history of depression and anxiety (undiagnosed because his family didn't believe him and he just sort of lives with it now) so I'm scared something finally pushed him over the edge. I try contacting his family and none have responded except for his  sister who says she hasn't heard from him in about a month. \n\nI won't be able to make it out there till next Saturday and I'm losing my mind.", "summary": "My boyfriend hasn't spoken to me in a couple days  and honestly I just needed advice on what to do or anything that can help me ease my mind."}
{"id": "t3_3kh3en", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by going on the bus stoned", "post": "First of all, this of course wasn't today, it was a few months ago. So I used to go to class really high every day since it's only 2 hours. Usually, I would take a couple bong hits right before I leave to catch the bus so I can feel the come up on the bus and spend the entire class very high. On this particular day, I took those hits before getting dressed then realized I was going to miss the bus so quickly got dressed and left. While on the bus I noticed I kept getting weird glances and looks from the other strangers on the bus. I just wrote it off as I'm probably acting weird without noticing or am just being paranoid. I finally get off the bus and begin my walk to class when, to my horror, I look down and lo and behold there is the fly on my jeans unzipped with my lacy hot pink underwear perfectly noticeable. Needless to say, I've never gotten high before getting dressed since then and obsessively check my fly to make sure it's zipped up.", "summary": "Got really high while getting ready for school, noticed everyone on the bus giving me weird looks only to discover that I was so high I forgot to zip up my fly and my hot pink underwear was on display."}
{"id": "t3_2fuwh0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 m] with my girlfriend [20 f] nearly 4 years, she said the relationship feels weird", "post": "Myself and my girlfriend have been together for nearly 4 years, a very pleasant relationship, we tell each other everything but still allow each other to have personal space, and still have our friends around us. We both go to different universities, about 2-3 hour train ride away from each other, but we live in the same hometown so still get many weeks with each other during the breaks. We have lasted 2 years of university and we are both in final year.\n\nShe wants to leave home after university and move to London, and I'm not entirely sure what I want to do yet.\n\nToday, I was laying with my girlfriend, and she started crying and covering her face, and it took a few moments of comforting her and asking her what's wrong, and I said 'is it us?' And this led to a conversation about our relationship, both very upset. This came very out of nowhere.\n\nShe said we are both quite independent now, the relationship isn't the same as it once was, and I did agree with her it an extent. It has gotten quite domesticated and we don't see each other as often, as well as the weeks away at uni. She was upset and so was I, we just kept crying with each other, and cuddling. We suggested a break (until at least Christmas assuming she implied first semester) and cuddled, the thing is I don't think a break will be good. Thus will just make us more independent.\n\nWe love each other to pieces, and if this is headed toward the end I feel very lonely and I really don't know what I am going to do without her. She is such a huge part of my life. I can't imagine it without her. \n\nShe texted me some hearts when I got home...I texted the same back, and she texted me 'I just wanted to say goodnight' in which I said goodnight back too.\n\nI thought at the time a break might be a positive thing, but now I'm sitting like a puppy pouncing at my phone hoping she messages me. I miss her so much already :(", "summary": "GF Of nearly 4 years wants a break, headed to a break up. Both still in love but are doing different things. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_ylknk", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Aside from weird dreams that some may already have spoken about, Reddit, what have been some of your funniest dreams?", "post": "One that I can vividly remember happened during 8th grade for me. The back story was that primarily for 4 days straight my friend and I just continually played Nazi Zombies on CoD. Thus, every night the images and ideas being so present in my mind that I would dream about fighting zombies. Well, this final night, my dream began where I was in the beginning stages of Nazi Zombies, fighting off the waves. As the battles teemed on, I somehow came to a final level (which I obviously created in my own mind). The final level consisted of myself and my friend entering a chamber, with an extremely large ceiling, also being dimly lit. THEN, out of nowhere, Hitler emerged from the darkness, *flying*, *wearing a cape*, *dual wielding Desert Eagles*, just firing at us, non-stop. The only image I remember from the dream is his face, screaming, flying, shooting at us. I woke up laughing my ass off.", "summary": "In a game of Nazi Zombies, get to final level, ends up with myself having to fight Hitler who is flying, wearing a cape, and dual wielding Deagles."}
{"id": "t3_301hwl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26M] fear of losing my girlfriend[25F] of 7 years because she wants to go to another country for work but I do not want to hold her back.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for 7 years. We met before college where she is an international student and I am a U.S. citizen. We were long distance for the first two years and later on another year when I moved to pursue grad school (3 out of the 7 years long distance). Last year, she accepted a job near where I go to school to be closer to me which is something I really, really appreciate.\n\nAfter almost a year, it turns out she does not like her job due to the work environment and salary. The work environment part I can understand since her bosses seem difficult to work with and her colleagues and her do not get along very well. The salary part really strikes me since it is really competitive given her background but she feels like she deserves more.\n\nShe is on an F-1 visa that her company is sponsoring and so she tells me it will difficult for her to find another company in the U.S. She has been seriously considering moving back to her home country to work for a new company. Her salary overseas will essentially be the same, perhaps a bit more than it is here, but the much lower cost of living means she has much more money left over to spend.\n\nI honestly feel that this is a horrible career move since the opportunity to advance overseas is not as good as it is here for her profession. She disagrees with me and think that the long-term outlook is good and it is a step towards her career aspiration. She pretty much tells me that the only reason she has for staying in the U.S. is because of me. I really do love her and feel horrible thinking that I might be holding her back from her career. We both admit we probably would not be able to handle another long-distance relationship, especially one across borders.\n\nAll advice is welcome.", "summary": "Long-term girlfriend wants to take a job in another country. I feel like I'm holding her back from her career aspirations. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2ncsuh", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Federal Student Loan Consolidation Questions", "post": "SO! I've read through a number of the posts here and have found some really great information about student loans and good ways to handle them and such, but nothing that answers my direct question:\n\nI have a number of federal student loans across two different servicing companies: NelNet for the subsidised ones and ACS with all my unsubsidized ones(originally serviced through Wells Fargo).\n\n- NelNet is, by far, the easier site/company to work with.  They let me break down my different loans with them to apply additional payments specifically to the loan I want, and show me exactly what my interest rate on each loan is.\n\n- ACS, on the other hand, shows me the cumulative sum of the amount I owe, and gives me the rate I need to pay them based off this, also telling me I have \"mixed\" interest rate (some are variable, some fixed, but they don't show me which loan has how much money still owed and at what interest rate).\n\n- I have looked at the Federal Loan Consolidation program, and noticed that when I was looking at my options, that I was able to see the breakdown of my loan amounts serviced through ACS, and noticed that I can move my consolidated loan over to NelNet as a servicer.\n\nMy question is two parts: \n- Am I able to just transfer all my loans from one servicer to another and have them be individual loans still?\n- IF NOT, would I be able to \"consolidate\" my loans from ACS one at time, and transfer them over to NelNet? Or would it have to be in one big lump sum (a real consolidation)?\n\nI'm not trying to get a better interest rate, really even, more just trying to make it easier for me to engage in \"snowball\" type divide and conquer finance tactics. Also, NelNet's interface/customer service is MILES and above better than ACS (seriously, it took 8 attempts online & 4 phone calls to get my address updated!)", "summary": "What precisely are the restrictions on moving between Federal Student Loan servicers, and on how you use Federal Loan Consolidation? "}
{"id": "t3_3319uz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21|F] am developing strong feelings for my emotionally-unavailable friend [23|M]. What do I do?", "post": "Hey, guys!\n\nFirst of all, my friend was in a seven-year relationship, and he was cheated on for two years, and he recently found out (about six months ago). Finding out destroyed him completely, and he only recently began no-contact with his ex-girlfriend.\n\nNow, he and I have had sex three times sober, and a few more times drunk. We're close, and it just sort of began. He's always there for me, and me for him, and we help each other a lot with everything that could be going on. He also takes his time to make sure I feel good, have eaten, telling me I'm beautiful and wonderful. Recently, he told me I deserve the best and that I'm amazing, and that he would love to take a chance at happiness eventually, and that I'd be perfect, but that he isn't ready yet. I also give him plenty of advice about his situation whenever he asks, and I've seen him make progress, slowly.\n\nThe problem is, I've started to develop feelings for him, and I don't know what to do about any of this. I'd love to just tell him, but I know he's emotionally unavailable.", "summary": "I've started to developed strong feelings for a good friend of mine after having slept together a few times, but he is emotionally unavailable due to his past relationship. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4j9ii6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17F] just broke up with my ex boyfriend [18M] of a year, and now I feel like someone gutted me", "post": "I know it's only a high school relationship, but we had been dating for so long. I broke up with him because he can't show emotions and comfort me the way I need, and he was becoming very controlling over all I did. \n\nHe was such a big part of my life, now I can't even walk into my house without thinking about him. It hurts a lot, but I know it's for the best.\n\nI just don't know what to do now. I know it takes time but I don't want it to feel this way forever.\n\nDo I just grit my teeth and move forward or is there some secret potion I can use to get over this faster?", "summary": "I don't know how to handle myself being single again after so long and I'm in severe emotional pain after losing someone I held dear for over a year."}
{"id": "t3_2bj45n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [23 M] has an overbearing mother [60 F] and it's driving me [21 F] crazy.", "post": "My boyfriend and I are in early 20's and have been dating a little over 2 years. Everything is going great, except his mother is extremely needy. She calls him several times a day about pointless things. Whenever I am over their house she checks on us in his room, ignores me and talks to him about whatever is making her stressed out that day. She asks him to do chores every time I am over when she could easily do them such as putting the dishes away or taking out the trash. Whenever we go on a trip somewhere (which we do a lot) She constantly texts and calls him to see what we are doing and if he's having fun. When we go out with friends she texts him saying not to be out too late even though he has off that next day. I have talked to him several times how it bothers me when his mom always calls and when she bothers us when I'm over their house. He said he agrees and that he talked to her about it, but nothing has changed. We plan on getting married in the future, but his mother drives me crazy with how needy she is and it's stressing me out. I need advice on how to deal with this, because I feel like this is straining our relationship. Any advice would be helpful. Sorry this is so long..it has been bothering me for a while now. Thank you for the help!", "summary": "My boyfriend's mother calls and checks in on him all the time when we are together. He has talked to her about letting him have his space, but she continues to do it."}
{"id": "t3_elakr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I won a vacation package from a contest at a local bar I frequent. The owner hasn't given the packet while all my Friends got theirs. What can I do?", "post": "I've been a simi-regular at a local bar for the past couple of years. Over the last two months they ran a local promotion with one of the radiostations in town giving away vacation packages to numerous destinations. \n\nI entered the drawing, and as luck (and maybe some good karma) would have it I won! I was really excited until the bar-owner told me \"I don't have the packets on me now, but I'll get it too you after I get back from a weekend trip\"\n\nThe weekend went past, and I saw the owner about a week later. The guy wouldn't make eye contact with me, and didn't say anything about the packet. I decided to let it slide thinking he forgot, and went on about my business. The proceeding Friday I went up there for happy hour and got some terrible customer service, was called a \"shithead\" by one of the employees, and basically insulted.\n\nI decided I wasn't going to take that shit from someone who can't keep their word, and decided to take a very long (and possibly permanent) leave of absence from the place, but I still feel like I should get my packet.\n\nDo I have any legal options here, or do I just need to stay on the guy's ass until he fulfills his part of the bargain?", "summary": "I won a vacation contest at a local bar, and the owner hasn't presented me with the information packet. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3qgx4q", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Just found out my [22F] boyfriend [24M] has been posting on Craigslist looking for transwomen", "post": "Please help me sort out my thoughts... I'm seriously freaking out about what to do.\n\nI've been dating my boyfriend for 3 years and he's wonderful. We've been long distance for the past year, and I'll be the first to admit that I have jealous and insecure tendencies. I snooped on an old email of his a while back and saw that 6 year ago he posted on Craigslist a few times looking for casual encounters with transwomen. Since nothing was posted after we started dating, I didn't think to bring it up, especially because it seemed as though nothing actually happened from the email exchanges he had.\n\nFor some reason, I decided to just check Craigslist's casual encounters page under M4T today in his area, and found an ad with his picture on it. Unmistakingly him, as it's a nude he sent to only me a few months ago. Amongst his ad, it says \"I'm up for anything safe. Still haven't found what I'm looking for\"\n\nI'm in shock, feel like I've been cheated on - if not already, then this feels like premeditated cheating. I seriously don't know what to do or what to think. I know I need to talk to him about this immediately, but he doesn't get off work until a few hours. I don't even know how I should bring up that I found this - it was so random, and I don't know if it would be the best idea to bring up that I had snooped on his email earlier and found earlier postings which led me to snoop on Craigslist today.\n\nPlease help... I can't concentrate on anything besides this right now, and I can't stop freaking out.", "summary": "Found ads on Craigslist posted by boyfriend of 3 years looking for casual encounters with transwomen and don't know how to confront him."}
{"id": "t3_3ku3sx", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Gf [f24] just broke up with me [m25]. I don't want to lose her, but she's unhappy.", "post": "The relationship has been going downhill for a while now. My job has me out of the country 5 days a week, and she works as a waitress so she's working the days I'm not. I live with her and her parents so I can see her as much as possible. We've been together for 4 years in October \n\nI first started noticing that the things were falling apart a year ago when the intimacy started to decline. I prompted conversations about the issue, but it was fluffed off as normal (Honey moon phase). Since then I've tried a few things, since lack of intimacy is a huge problem, to renew the heat - lose weight to be more attractive, seed sexual thoughts in her mind while I'm away, sending photos, little dates (which she's declined), and even that online test that matches your kinks/interests. I've started to notice that she's very uncomfortable with her body, even though she's beautiful (I tell her often), so that may be why the intimacy has declined. \n\nToday, she told me she's unhappy. I eventually got her to explain why, and it was a simple \"us\"... \"Things are different, we're not the same anymore. It's like we're not in a relationship.\" additionally, she feels the need to explore, as I'm only her second sexual partner and she hasn't been single very long in her life; saying that she feels the need to love herself before she can give me what I want - love and intimacy.\n\nI don't want to lose her. She's a great young woman that I can really see raising our children with. I've thrown up the idea of an open relationship, a break, and even starting over (we're going on vacation to Barbados in October for our 4 year anniversary) but they were all shot down. Do i just let her go, and move on?", "summary": "gf [24] broke up with me[25]. I don't want to lose her, but she's really not giving me other options."}
{"id": "t3_1wdh0z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24M] unsure of [22F] and I should make the next step.", "post": "Hey guys first off thanks for reading.\n\nI've been dating this girl I met for sometime now and I know she is hinting me that she wants to more than date and be exclusive.\n\nI am having a hard time deciding what to do and was wondering if I can get your help. I think my biggest issue is that my last relationship ended badly by my ex cheating on me so I might be having some trust issues. The issue with this new girl is something she said she wanted me to know because she wants to be honest about everything with me?\n\nTurns out she is still friends with one of her on and off dates who sometimes happen to hang out with her and crash in her bed when he's tired. Tell me I'm not being crazy thinking this is not ok?\n\nShe tells me she has no feelings for him anymore but tells me he's the time to always flirt with her but she knows he is joking about it. Personally when she gave me examples it sounded like he was still into her.\n\nShe keeps telling me that if he is a problem she won't hangout with him anymore etc etc But I never really gave her any answers since I wanted some time to process all this. \n\nCan you guys give me some advice on how to handle this? Should I even bother and just move on?\n\nThank you for reading.", "summary": "frequest date wants to be exclusive, but she still hangs out with one of her old on and off dates who sometimes happen to sleep on her bed."}
{"id": "t3_nhuf1", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, would you give this final an A?", "post": "For my final project in World Politics 116 we are required to author a blog about international relations. I think it stands very well on it's own in regards to quality and effort, but the blogs are graded in four parts, one being \"diversity and quality of readership as seen in the comment section of your blog.\" Unfortunately blogging is hard, yo, and although I am extremely proud of the content and hard work I put into this project, I am not skilled at all when it comes to marketing and distributing a blog. (This is my first try ever.) \n\nIf you appreciate my view, analysis or writing skills, please leave your appreciation / opinion in a comment. If you don't, please let me know! Also by leaving a comment, constructive criticism ftw.", "summary": "Help me do well in class by reading current events and telling me how much my writing sucks/has changed your life. Thank you reddit brothers and sisters!"}
{"id": "t3_35dlhy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "8 year relationship, want to move forward, get married, but Me [27 M] has issues with my girlfriend [26 F] and being sexually attracted to her. Advice?", "post": "I've been in an 8 year relationship with a great, beautiful girl. We have grown up together and we both love each other. She wants to get married, and I would like to get married but I've worried for a very long time about it.\n\nI have a secret desire to be with other women that I find more physically stimulating. I have an obsession with medium to larger boobs and more meat on a female body. My girlfriend's very petite and thin. Though I recognize and acknowledge her beauty, I'm half the time unsatisfied with our intimacy. This is a secret of mine, but she gets frustrated when I lack interest in sex, when sometimes I prefer to watch porn.\n\nBoth she and I are attractive people, but should I let my obsession stand in the way of us getting married? I don't want to divorce or cheat on her. We broke up briefly in the past because of these issues but we got back together because we really love each other and have a very strong emotional bond. Does marriage help kill these desires, or will I always crave this certain body type and live in misery?\n\nAnyone out there go through similar issues?", "summary": "8 year relationship, perfect girl, love her, but desire other women physically more than her 50% of the time. Can we marry?"}
{"id": "t3_4n423l", "subreddit": "needadvice", "title": "Are these Ethical and/or Legal practices of a Psychiatrist?", "post": "Hello r/needAdvice, I've been going to see my Psychiatrist who has been prescribing me medication without any real diagnosis. He simply prescribes me the medication because I have trouble focusing. That is pretty much the only reason he will give them to me. Is this a valid enough reason? There's no real diagnosis as to why I am taking them.\n\nI decided to get a second opinion in terms of my conditions but that Psychiatrist is also just doing the same thing. I wanted to get a full diagnosis so I can understand what I'm tackling as well as the fact that my insurance company will not cover the medication unless it were under a diagnosis.\n\nSo is this a normal thing that Psychiatrist do? Is this not unethical or somewhat illegal?", "summary": "Being prescribed medication for focus but no diagnosis, is this ethical and legal? If so, whats the rationale behind this and why do this?"}
{"id": "t3_rv9bc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What are some moments in your life when you wanted to go \"That is utter bullshit!\", but couldn't?", "post": "For me, it was quite recently. In Sweden, where I live, we have national tests in Swedish, English and Math: Everyone in Sweden in the same age group take the same test at the same time. It's quite a big deal.\n\nRecently, I did mine in Oral English. We were in a group of five, discussing news stories. There is this guy who's a bit shy, and hadn't said anything through the 10 minutes we've been there, and the time is almost up for our group. Suddenly, he starts telling a story, and he's doing it good. \n\nIt was about a couple who was in Vegas, entered an elevator in their hotel. After them comes a black man in a hoodie. When he enters the elevator, and the doors are shut, he says \"down\". The couple dives to the floor, thinking they're getting mugged. The black guy laughs, presses his floor button, rides there and exists, still laughing. The next day, when checking out, the couple receives a bouquet of roses made out of $100 bills. In the bouquet is a note, which reads \"Thanks for the laughs! -Eddie Murphy\".\n\nhowever, as any frequent Snopes-visitor knows, this story is complete [bullshit] All while he was telling this story, I just wanted to go \"No. That never happened. It's an urban myth.\" But I couldn't just ruin his last try at a national test.", "summary": "A shy kid tells [this myth] as a fact on an important exam, and I can't correct him. "}
{"id": "t3_2ixkbr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my SO[26M] of over a year, am I unreasonable to be annoyed with his phone policy?", "post": "Ugh I feel ridiculous for posting about this, but after what feels like the millionth blow up about this, I need outside perspectives.\n\nMy partner of a year and I are both on our phones a lot. I try to cut back when we're together, but I'm fine with us both sitting on the couch or in separate rooms browsing through the interwebs silently. My problem is I put my phone down when he begins talking to me, because to me that becomes more important. \n\nHe does not feel the same. My partner is involved in a lot of online discussions surrounding his hobby, as well as general tumblring or Facebook scrolling. This is fine with me, but when I try talking to him or tell him a story, he literally refuses to look up from his screen. I never attempt to get his attention if he's texting or on a call, but if he's just commenting on a thread I don't really see the issue. When he ignores me while I'm speaking for random people on the interest who aren't even waiting for his reply, I feel hurt and unimportant. The way I see it is, the thread will *always* be there, but my excitement in sharing something with him will not, or the moment will pass. \n\nI've tried to tell him this, and he basically feels that it's selfish and childish of me to expect him to put his phone down \"just because I feel like talking\". I've asked him explicitly how he wants me to act when I want to talk when he's on the phone, and his response was that I should ask to talk to him, knowing he may say \"no\". Apparently 90% of the time he'll say yes, but that I can't expect to be prioritised over online commenting. \n\nTo me this feels weirdly clinical and cold. It ruins the spontaneity of engaging and connecting with my SO in a conversation. Having to ask permission just feels like I'm in school. \n\nI would stress that I am an independent woman who does not need or want my partners attention to be constantly on me. I'm a big fan of my own space, but this just feels hurtful.", "summary": "Boyfriend thinks he shouldn't need to look up from his phone when I'm trying to talk to him. I think I deserve some goddamn eye contact."}
{"id": "t3_4kdwpp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21M] girlfriend[23F] doesn't like that I have my own chef and maid", "post": "I have been working from home since I was 18. I moved to another countries for two years and always lived with one or two mates and we always had own chef who did shopping and made food for us and then we had maid clean our place once a week. It made everything so much easier because we would work at home and then we'd have time to do all kind of things while we didn't have to worry about cooking or getting take out every single time.\n\nI moved back to my home country around 8 months ago and met my gf around that time. We have been together for 6 months and we get along well and have small arguments but nothing huge at all. But she absolutely hates that I have own chef and maid still and I should just make my own things and has said she might leave me if I continue like this. I don't see any problems if I hire someone to cook for me and clean my place every once in a while. When she's over here I let her cook and won't have maid / chef here but when I'm alone I just have them over. I don't know what should I do if she isn't fine with this and if I should start cleaning/cooking by myself which I haven't done for past 3 years.\n\nShe has talked how would it ever work if we moved together and started family and I just told her that it won't affect that in anyway and as long as I live alone I'm planning on having own chef/maid. She got really pissed and said to give her some time.", "summary": "Have own chef and maid but gf doesn't like it and said she might leave me if I don't start cooking/cleaning by myself."}
{"id": "t3_2szzu7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "GF [21F] is now forbidden from coming to my house [22M] by her family. Relationship is fading.", "post": "GF and I have been together for a month.  We both live with our parents.  On occasion, she has spent the night at my place, only to be scolded later by her family.  She was warned to stop sleeping over or face being kicked out of the house.\n\nHeeding their warning, we decided to limit how late we spend time together.  However, a few nights ago, after partying at a friends', we ended up drinking a lot.  A friend dropped us off at my house, where GF left her car.  I told her to sober up inside before driving home.  We ended up passing out.\n\nThis was the last straw.  She's forbidden from coming over now.  I'm still welcome to come to her place, but with a strict curfew and supervision.  It's putting a strain on our relationship.\n\nWe still see each other outside the house, but without being able to spend time together in privacy, the relationship is losing some of its steam.\n\nI really like this girl, and I don't want to break up over this, but it may be out of our control.  Is there anything I can do?", "summary": "GF's forbidden from coming to my house, and I can't go to hers without severe restrictions.  Not really enjoying it.  What do?"}
{"id": "t3_39416s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (23F) get over ex's (23M) new relationship?", "post": "I'm friends with my ex whom I no longer have any feelings for and who currently has a new girlfriend. It didn't bother me at first but now I notice that he does things with her that I had always wanted to do with him but he wouldn't want to. For example, I would have to beg to spend time with him sometimes and with his new gf he'll be there at a drop of a hat if she asks. It's really taking a beating to my self esteem and I keep wondering why he's such a good bf to her and why he wasn't to me. I know it's irrational but how can I shake it off? I keep trying but the feeling that I wasn't good enough creeps back in. \n\nAlso, keep in mind that he was my first relationship and this is the first time I'm dealing with a situation like this.", "summary": "How do I shake the feeling that I wasn't good enough when my ex does things with his new gf that he wouldn't do with me?"}
{"id": "t3_2lurs1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M/F] with my ex-bf [22 M/F] recently broke up and no contact was set up, but he is still reaching out to me. What do I do?", "post": "Hello, all. I just recently got out of a long term relationship of 5 years. My ex and I used to attend the same university, but I got into med school and since moved away. The distance was rough on us, and it led to a lot of changes on my end. In the end, we decided to end it and did so amicably. When we first broke up, I asked that we remain friends and still update one another one each other's lives. At first, I thought that I could easily fall back into being friends with him, but I realized that it was too painful to talk to him or text him and be reminded of the end of the relationship. \n\nA few days after the break up, he called me, and I didn't pick up because I knew it would be too painful to speak to him. I sent him an email explaining that I wanted no contact for a little while so that we could both heal from the break up. I did have nothing from him for a day or so, but this morning I woke up and saw a text from him wishing me luck for an upcoming test. Seeing the text made me sad and a little upset that he is unwilling to respect the no-contact rule that I requested.\n\nI think that he continues to reach out to me because he doesn't have as good of a support group as I do (family and friends who support me and check in on me periodically), and for the past 5 years, I was that support. So, he is reaching out to me, but I don't think that reaching out to me will help either of us heal. I don't want to be mean and ignore him especially since I still care for him, but at the same time, I told him that I needed distance and time and no contact through texting, calling, etc. What should I do? I hate to think he's having a rough time with no one to talk to, but I really don't think I'm the one he should be reaching out to. Should I reply to his text very generally? Should I just reply at all?", "summary": "Recently broken up amicably with long term boyfriend of 5 years. Established a no contact rule after realizing that it was painful to maintain contact, but am still getting contacted by ex. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2sxsjb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [23/m] was sleeping beside colleague. Ended up she starts fooling around. Should i tell GF? [23/f]", "post": "So me and my male colleague was crashing at a third colleague's place, after a night out. My male colleague crashed on the couch and i was a totally wreck, had gotten to much to drink. I took the choice of crashing beside our female colleague. Nothin were supposed to happen. I kinda wake up of her sittin on top of me and is dry humpin and the next second when I have my counscious back, I have my hand down her pants and she has her hand squeezin my d*ick outside my pants. Then she is questioning me if I want to have sex. I just remember that I'm pulling away and then she leaves the bed. I never even kissed the girl. This small encounter have leaved me with a guilt-trip and anxiety level going thrue the roof.\n\nThere was never any intention or idea to have any sexuall encounter. To be honest i'm feelin a bit used. I love my girl so deeply. I am prepared to spend the rest of my life with her.\n\nI need advice from u guys. Should I tell her exactly how it was and if she might forgive me, she will have to live with the picture of me and someone else for the rest of her life. Or should I just leave it like it was, a drunken mistake that i almost was in no control of.", "summary": "Falls asleep beside colleague. She is tryin it on me. Wakes up with my hand in her pants. Anxiety and guilt. Should I just move on, without telling GF?"}
{"id": "t3_10al59", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Recently, I discovered my friend thinks I gave her boyfriend/holiday romance guy head. It kinda explains why she's been distant lately, but what should I do?", "post": "Ok, so a bit of background. It was the last day of our vacation and the three of us were sat in his (the boyfs) room. We ended up playing strip poker. Half way through she left but said she'd be back in a minute, so I stayed a bit longer. When she came back, she said she was going to bed, but being the last day of our vacation, I didn't want to leave then, and I still had my clothes on, so I just said we'd finish playing. \n\nI really regret not leaving with her, but I thought everything would be fine as I was still fully clothed. It was an error of judgement. \n\nHe starts getting touchy-feeley and makes me take my top of, which, regretfully, I did. Then he starts trying to get me to have sex with him. I refuse. He starts trying to get me to give him a handjob. I sort of pat it. He trys to put it between my tits but I'm moving away. \n\nAt this point the door busts open and it's my friend. He springs away like a bolt of lightening, which I thought then made the situation look worse. She said she'd forgotten her purse and leaves straight away. Only last week my friend tells me she'd returned to our room crying and saying she'd caught me giving him head. \n\nNow I don't know what to do. It was a while ago, so I don't just want to randomly bring it up out of no-where, but we were pretty good friends, and the last thing I want is to ruin it because of all this. I know I was in the wrong staying, but in fairness it was the sort of holiday where nakedness and psudo-sexual acts were common-place.", "summary": "Friend walked in on awkward nakedness with her holiday romance putting his dick near my face and runs back to our room crying and tells our friend she caught me giving him head."}
{"id": "t3_22j1jo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (27f) with my bf (24m) co dependency, fighting, begging him to see a therapist. I'm at my wits end.", "post": "My bf and I have been together for about 3 years and have a child together. I have been begging him to get help for his bi polar for two years now. He used to be physical but not anymore. \n\nWhen we argue it turns very heated and he ends up yelling and screaming, and I spend most of the argument begging him to lower his voice. \n\nI take care of all of our finances and pay rent, things are very tight money wise as he doesn't work and hasn't held a job for more then 3 months for well over two years.\n\nI tell him to get out when it seems he might become physical and he refuses to. Then at random arguments he actually does storm out but not be for breaking something or leaving with my bank card or taking the only form of entertainment I have with him.\n\nHere is where the co dependence kicks in. I beg him to come back, part of me feels like I can't live with out him and I need him and all that other crap. It makes me feel disgusted with my self to feel this way.\n\nHe says I nit pick at him and bitch at him because I bring things that upset me to him. That I treat him like he's a house pet because I tell him to get out when he is bordering on getting physical. That I'm checked out of the relationship because I don't support him in his struggle with his big polar ( I'm not equipped to sort out his mental issues, this is why I beg him to get help).\n\nMy self esteem is so in the shitter after this relationship has been on my shoulders for 3 years. How do I sort through these feelings of co dependency. So that I'm not some loser begging for him to come back.\n\nHas anyone else had a tough to end relationship? How did you set things final and how did you cope with the massive change?", "summary": "I'm a co- dependant idiot, how do I make changes that last, or fix my relationship so its healthy."}
{"id": "t3_2rbgbm", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Do I (20M) move on or wait for my best friend (20f) to finish her promise?", "post": "I asked my best friend to be my girlfriend twice. The first time she said she wasn't ready. The second time, she said \"I still don't know. I like being friends\". I took that as sign that I'm just going to drop it. Alright, fair enough. Move on. We'll be friends. \n\nBut she hit me with a curve ball. She kissed me. I asked her what we are few days later and she said \"I don't know\". After prying into her a bit, she told me that she made a promise with her parents not to date in college (she admitted it was stupid). I told her I respect whatever decision you make, and she said \"I'm afraid I won't find a guy like you. You're the ideal guy for me. I don't want my first kiss, your first kiss to go to waste. I wanted you to be my first kiss. I like you. But my answer is no, to the most genuine guy I know and love, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry \". She was crying hard and logged off before I could say anything. \n\nShe respects her parents and never breaks promises. I feel like that was the deciding factor, not her true feelings. If I wait, I'd be waiting 2 years for when we both graduate from college.\n\n I need help as I'm blinded by emotion. I don't date people easily and that's what scares me.", "summary": "Not sure to wait 2 years (the rest of college)  to date my best friend or not. She has feelings for me, but made a promise not to date in college with her parents. I don't date people easily."}
{"id": "t3_k7cve", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Follow your dreams or play it safe?", "post": "So my dream is do stand up comedy, improv comedy, writing and/or sketch comedy full time. I have done improv for 11-12 years now and I have been featured in some pretty mainstream comedy videos online, I have done my own sketch show, and I have done my fair share of networking. I think I am ready to take my \"leap of faith\" and I feel like time is only working against me... \n\nMy problem is I have been raised to do one thing my whole life. I have learned that there is a \"right\" way to do everything and I have, for the most part, played by the rules. I went to high school, then college, then got a career and here I am. Financially I am fine. I am a 26 year old single man that owns his own house and car. I mean like anyone I have/had my problems but for the most part I have a good, logical head on my shoulders. (WHICH IS WHY THIS IS SO HARD!) :)\n\nAnother issue is my two brothers rent rooms from me and they are for lack of better words... dead beats. My mom cannot afford to house them and I do love the idiots. I have no idea how they would react if I essentially evicted them to just pursue something they would never understand and where I could potentially lose everything. \n\nSo, I have a few questions for you reddit... \n\nDo I leave it all behind? Has anyone here ever done it or something similar? Can anyone lend help, advice, a job in the industry? haha. I could really use any and all CONSTRUCTIVE advice/criticism on the matter because frankly I am not really close to anyone anymore that I can have these kind of conversations with. \n\nIf anyone wants more details about my mundane and lonely existence please don't hesitate to ask! :)", "summary": "Should I quit my career that pays for my general well being (house, car, etc.) or follow my dreams in comedy and risk throwing it all away?"}
{"id": "t3_1139ow", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I think my boss is stealing tips from me at work... What should I do, Reddit?", "post": "So I work at a small pizza shop on a college campus as an assistant manager. Yesterday was gameday (our biggest days sales wise) and I opened the shop at 9 as usual, left at 2, and then came back at 5 to work until 9 again. Now when I left at 2 there was $4 in the tip jar (I think no big deal, I'll just grab that at the end of the night), however, once the end of my night shift came and went, I had forgotten to grab my tips. So I text the GM to put all my tips from my shifts into an envelope so I can get it this morning when I came into work. He said he would do that, but when I got here today there was only $4 in the tip jar (no envelope). Obviously I was pissed. The store was packed pretty much all night, so there's no way that there were no tips from 2 to 9. To futher my case, I checked the numbers from last night and found that the GM fudged the numbers. We came out $45 over what we should have had (basically the tips on credit cards that hadn't been pulled that night due to how busy we were). The GM wrote down that the books came out even, when I really think he took the tips I worked my ass off for... So Reddit, how should I confront this situation? Has anybody else faced a situation like this?", "summary": "found evidence of my boss taking my tips at work. I work too hard for bullshit like this. Any advice, reddit?"}
{"id": "t3_1xy00f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What is the right way to handle the breakup of two equally close friends?", "post": "Apologies for any language issue in advance, English is not my native tongue.\n\nMy partner \"John\" and I are best friends with another couple who will probably be splitting up soon. \"Maria\" and \"David\" have been together for about 4 years, and John and Maria have been good friends since high school. David has been really good to and for Maria and is an all around great guy. Maria confided in me recently however that he has been thinking about breaking up for a lot of typical feelings-reasons (not ready for the long term relationship that she wants, etc). She's devastated about it. Although I'm pretty frustrated with David because he's being really wishy washy about what he wants and hurting her in the process, it's not exactly an unpardonable offense. I know that breakups are really hard. I still love both of them no matter what.\n\nThat said, what is the best way to handle this from an outside perspective? We live in a small town where everybody knows each other and have a large friend group that gets together multiple times weekly and host a big party at our place once every couple weeks. We have multiple tabletop games going that both of them are involved in. How can john and I remain friends with both of them under the circumstances?\n\nEverybody involved is approximately 25.", "summary": "Our best friends are breaking up. How do we handle it without any hurt feelings and with as much tact and kindness as possible?"}
{"id": "t3_46xwec", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] not in a relationship, but dating a [22F] found out she had a relationship with someone and i'm not to fond of it. Can someone help me out and fix my insecurity issue?", "post": "We are both black, and I found out the girl I have been dating used to date exclusively only white men.  Like exclusively until she met me.  Her only partners have been white men.  I mean, I am not cool with this.  I am not into the interracial dating scene and this is really an issue with my psyche.  I know this is racist.  I get it, but this is really bothering me.  She is an awesome chick, and I want to start a relatinship with her, but the thought that she only was with a \"select race\" of men bothers me.  \n\nLike what made me so special, why is she hanging out with me now.....  What changed her perceptions of black men in general as to why she did not like dating them until now...  Reddit, hear me out on this.  I know its racist, I know its a stupid thought, I know a lot of people on thissite are white, but i am not trying to start some kind of race war.   I just have nowhere else to go, and i am an insecure black dude just looking for a hand here.  \n\nSo how does one not be insecure about this situation?", "summary": "Girl i am dating used to only date white guys, I am a black male, and I have a problem with this.  Help me to stop being an insecure idiot"}
{"id": "t3_1sx200", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the best thing to do when your grandparents get scammed over the phone?", "post": "I'm not sure if there really is anything I can do but I feel so bad because .... well here is the story and you'll know why I feel extremely bad.\n\nMy grandfather calls me this morning and the fist thing he asks me is \"thecakey, where are you?\" I, confused about the question, I honestly answered him and told him that I was at work. I hear my grandmother in the background nagging him to hand the phone over. He does but as he is handing the phone over he tells her that they got scammed big time. My grandmother asked me the same thing and I am completely lost as to what was happening and to hear the word scammed I can only think the worst. She asked me if I was able to get out of the Arizona jail okay and get back home safely. I, of course, was blown away at these questions. I assured her that I was never and probably never ever will be. Mind you my grandparents are both retired and in their late 80s and I'm sure I too if I was in their shoes that I would fall victim to the story they shared with me.\n\nApparently, they received a phone call from Nevada 3 days ago telling them that I was put away for a DUI and vehicular manslaughter. Also, they tricked them by putting \"me\" on the phone to tell them that I was on my way home from a funeral for a close friend and I had a glass of wine, which explains the DUI, and a pregnant lady hit me and the accident caused the fetus to die. I requested that they wire me money to cover my bail and cover all the Arizona court fees and \"I made them promise me to not tell anyone because I didn't want anyone to know. 3 days in a row \"I\" asked for more and more money until my grandfather finally called to ask me what was going on.\n\nI feel bad because my identity was used to scam them out of money. If they accidentally signed up for those douche bag magazine scammers then I would feel bad but not as bad as I do with this situation.", "summary": "My grandparents got scammed for a lot of money thinking they were helping me out of a jam. I feel bad. What is there to do?"}
{"id": "t3_2h30ys", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 F] with my ex [26 F] duration 5.5 years, Using same accounts and still following activity!", "post": "Hello Reddit World!\n\nAfter dating for five years and six months then being broken up for the past three months we still use the same Starbucks and Costco account.\n\nWhenever one of us buys coffee the other person gets a notification on our iPhone. Well as of last Wednesday I quit texting and replying to her messages because I hate to be the one waiting. In the meantime I go to Starbucks and study. \n\nThis has been our text log since Wednesday:\n\nWeds: I get a retake but idk [her], Thursday: Hi [her], Sunday: Who do u always buy coffee for on the bux card? Just saying [her]. \n\nI know I need to stop using the Starbucks app but after five years I feel like it be difficult to cut out of my life. \n\nWhat do you think?", "summary": "After dating for five years and six months then being broken up for the past three months we still use the same Starbucks and Costco account."}
{"id": "t3_kl97b", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Tired of always being the Second-to-last guy people are with.", "post": "A bit of background:\n\nAll of my exes that I have had, (with the [current] exception of my most recent one [less than two months since breakup]) are married, and all of the ones that had interest, have kids.\n\nEvery single one of them.\n\nMy most recent ex broke up with me under the guise of we needed to take a break so we were better together, and kept saying things like we needed space so we could become better for ourselves, not each other.\nThen today I found out that not only is she with someone else in all possible ways, less than two months after our breakup, but she realized when she met him while we were still together that he was the one she was going to spend her life with.", "summary": "So now here I am again, single, with yet another ex on the way to being with the guy of her dreams."}
{"id": "t3_2x39hd", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/f] pretty sure [30/m] wants to be friends with benefits. How do I know if I can handle that?", "post": "this boy asked for my number towards the end of December. We've been hanging out since then. He was super straightforward and told me his whole sex and relationship history and asked me about mine which I'm still a virgin (grew up very religious recently broke out of that). Constantly asks me questions like if I'm looking for a relationship, what type of men I go for etc. Always sends me texts telling me I turn him on how sexy I am etc. \n\nhe has been pretty busy most of February and with my work/school schedule and his we hadn't been able to hang out. Still texting though. We were talking and he told me that I seem like I want a relationship and at this point he is trying to focus on his career and just doesn't have the time but he doesn't want to hurt me and he still wants me in his life and wants to continue hanging out with me and invited me to come over to his place on friday. Which every time we hang out we go to his place he pours me glass after glass of wine. He never drinks any and we end up talking for hours and making out. He has been really sweet about not having sex yet and told me he isn't going to push me into anything until I'm ready. \n\nWhich honestly I think I am ready but I'm not sure since he doesn't want a relationship if I would be able to handle being friends with benefits and I don't want to get hurt.\non one hand I think screw it I'm 20 I'm a virgin I've been a good girl all my life I wouldn't mind just doing something casual and meaningless but on the other I don't know if I could do it without developing feelings for him", "summary": "boy says he doesn't have time for a relationship. Still wants to see me but I'm not sure if I can go through with it without catching feelings for him"}
{"id": "t3_2jpqqv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[18 M] cannot get over first real girlfriend/love [18 F] even after a year since breaking up when we dated for 1 1/2 yrs.", "post": "Hey all, using a throwaway here, thanks for listening :)\n\nI dated a girl for about a year and a half, then broke up with her July of last year because I felt like I wasn't getting anything in return for trying within the relationship. I then regretted it, wanted her back, etc and she had already joined the ranks of tinder and I was heartbroken.\n\nSkip forward to the present. The last several months prior to her leaving for college we remained in somewhat of an open relationship. Fooling around, being sexual, hanging out, essentially dating without the title. Night before she left I wrote her a letter and she read it and broke down and I felt like we still had that strong connection. I also visited her at school, partied with her, and had a great weekend.\n\nIn the last few weeks however, I had met another girl who has very similar likes and the chemistry between us is organic, and not created (which is not how my previous relationship felt(felt like forcing a circle into a square)). Essentially we are dating but I have yet to \"ask her out\" in terms of being boyfriend girlfriend because I just wanted to give myself time.\n\nEven with the new girl in my life, I still find myself with that lump in my throat feeling whenever I think about my ex. She's always there in my mind, seeing her photos on facebook make me have a bigger lump, I get jealous of seeing her at parties, I get jealous about thinking shes hooking up with other guys at parties, etc.\n\nHow do I stop? How do I climb this damn fence that always stops me from letting myself go? Most importantly I just don't want to hurt the girl I'm currently involved with.", "summary": "Can't let her go. Feel like masochist for thinking about her all the time and don't want to ruin my current relationship. How do I put it behind me?"}
{"id": "t3_12f9q5", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Aunt is terrible parent and doesn't want to admit it, therefore placing the blame on my cousin.", "post": "I wasn't too sure of where to actually post this, but I was hoping maybe someone could give me a bit of advice. Here's a bit of the back story. My aunt got married to my uncle who is 12 years older than her, who never wanted children or to be married in the first place. My aunt has always had issues with herself, forced the marriage and kids upon him therefore making for a bad relationship between my aunt and uncle.\nFast forward to today, my aunt has a 13 year old lets call her Mary and 19 year old lets call her Jill. Jill was babied growing up until Mary came a long then she had to grow up fast. Growing up Mary has always been babied and never encouraged to do anything for herself. She was never encouraged to say please or thank you, never encouraged to talk to people, never even encouraged to go to school. Mary is 5'7 and weighs probably 230+lbs. For a 13 year old who is going through hormones this is a major effect on her body image/confidence and many other things.\nAnyways, my aunt is a terrible parent. My uncle? He never wanted children and it really shows, which leave a bad impression on my cousins. My aunt is trying to get Mary diagnosed with something, ANYTHING, because she is in such a deep denial and cannot point the fingers at herself that she went wrong with babying my cousin so now she has the mentality of a 7 year old at best. They went to a psychiatrist and she got \"diagnosed\" with aspergers and OCD. She wont talk to anyone because shes not encuraged to nor was ever taught the social means to do so. There is no way in hell she has either of these things. My aunt was even wanting to put her on meds she doesn't need. Also she isn't encouraged at all to go to school, she sits at home all day on the computer. This is getting to a point where i'm getting mentally sick of seeing this going on in front of my eyes, that my cousin, is doing this. This is abuse.\nSomeone, anyone, could I do anything to help or not?", "summary": "Aunt is a bad parent, therefore trying to diagnose cousin with something, and going to give her meds. Cousin is going to end up a fat blob in the projects on welfare."}
{"id": "t3_35fa96", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Florida - Can a store owner take away the tips of someone making at least minimum wage?", "post": "Hey guys. I know I just asked another question this morning, but I have a second hypothetical...\n\nI make minimum wage plus tips. The owners play this out as being generous to us. So we collect tips, and they disperse it to us through our bi-weekly paychecks.\n\nI put in my two weeks notice after a very tense discussion with my boss, and I'm wondering... if he collects tips from customers, is he obligated to disperse them to workers, or is he allowed to say fuck you to someone he doesn't like, and exclude them from receiving any tips on their last paycheck?", "summary": "Do tipping laws only apply to tipped workers making 2.15 an hour, or do they apply to anyone making tips? "}
{"id": "t3_3gmbsb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is my [23F] boyfriend [23M] of 3 years overreacting? I texted him a flirty uberfact which led him to ask if I wanted to be a porn star.", "post": "I know this sounds really silly, I just think it was unnecessary for him to ask me if I wanted to do porn. This is how the convo went:\n\nI texted him the uberfact screenshot: The average female porn star is a 5'5\" brunette woman who weighs 117 lbs and has B-cup breasts. \n\n(I sent this to him because we had great sex the night before and was trying to be flirty since it matched my height,weight, etc.)\n   \nBF: what are you saying? you're a porn star or wanna be one?\n\nme: (laughing emoji) I thought it was funny\n\nBF: I assume that's a yes\nBF: ?\nBF: be honest would you want to be one?\n\nme: are you f-ing kidding me? I was just trying to be funny and then you got all serious about it. \n\nBF: no, I just wanna know. I won't get mad\n\nme: no, I don't want to be a f-ing porn star.\n\nIt goes on and I basically told him that I felt it was unnecessary to ask me that. He went on to blame my hormones and called me names such as crazy and dramatic. He said I was trying to take the question to another level but that's what I feel he was doing from the beginning by even asking me that. Am I overacting? or is he? I feel that I got defensive right away because we have been going through a rough patch and just recently got back together. He refuses to apologize because he feels he did nothing wrong. I was just trying to be flirty with him and never thought he would take it so seriously.", "summary": "Sent boyfriend an uberfact with a description of the average female pornstar which matched with my height, weight etc. I guess he took it as me wanting to be a pornstar and decided to ask me."}
{"id": "t3_2ks5zr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my schoolmate [~21F], not sure about how to make it happen", "post": "Hi /r/relationships, I'm new to reddit, I'm a 20yo student in an engineering school, and I'm pretty shy/introvert/whatever makes you uncomfortable with girls.\n\nAs you may know, the percentage of girls in engineering schools is very low and it makes it harder for guys to get closer with a girl... \n\nSo here is the story (and I'm sorry for my english, which is not my native language): some students from medical schools get the chance to spend one or 2 years in our school, and they follow the same courses as us (me included). One of these students is a cute girl which follows the same courses as I do 2 days a week. As a shy guy, and because I assume I wont get a gf in my school due to the unbalanced ratio I talked about, I havent talked to her at all until 2 weeks ago. I asked her if I could borrow her lessons because I have missed some courses, she answered me nicely, saying she could give me her courses even if her handwirting was bad etc... Then she asked for my phone number, where it was not essential as she would have put her courses in my locker and I would give it back to here on next course.\n\nSo she first texted me the day after, saying I could ask her if I had any problem understanding what she wrote or whatever, and texted me again the nest day to be sure I found her courses in my locker and that I could ask if I had troubles blablabla\n\nNext course, I give the courses back to her, and she starts asking me how I plan my holidays and stuff, she was quite adorable with me imo haha\n\nNow it's been a week of holidays and I will see her again on monday.\nSo this is simple, I don't know if she might be interested in me, but I am in her and I have no clue of what to do next, except that I must be confident about myself ( this doesnt explain what to do next btw).\nI am pretty good looking but I dont know if she's out of my league or something..\n\nFeel welcome to comment :)\nThanks", "summary": "! : Basically need to know if I may have a chance with this girl and what to do to make sure of this and do the next steps"}
{"id": "t3_2p48ax", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[26/M] What is taboo about my line of thinking?", "post": "In 2011, I met who I thought was the most wonderful, beautiful young woman ever. Not many people ever click with me and she just did, perfectly. Our relationship had its issues, but we were both happy. In August 2012, I became ill. I had a brain mass, but my illness was a horrible generalized anxiety that was just confusing everything. I would pass out, get headaches and be at general unease. It was hard to know if the brain mass was causing this or the anxiety (more than likely the anxiety). Soon enough, she disappeared on me. \n\nI still think of her. I never did get the closure I probably needed, but I have accepted she'll never be in my life again. I don't know if I'm ready for a relationship or not, but I have yet to really date since then. What troubles me right now is the Holiday Season. Christmas was my favorite holiday and steadily it became depressing until 2011, when she and I went to Michigan and stayed together. It was such a simple visit, but it was an amazing time for me and brought happiness to the holiday once again. As you can imagine, I think of this often. But bad thoughts come into my head. When I remember the past, I must revert back to the present where she isn't my girlfriend anymore. I have invasive thoughts of her being romantic with someone else, having sex with someone else. \n\nPeople are bothered when I mention this. They assume that I'm trying to \"own\" her by being bothered she's having sex with someone else. But maybe I should explain that sex to me is kind of a big deal with someone. I don't do it, to just do it, I'm afraid. I know a lot of people tend to think it's one of those \"evolutionary\" things, but my Psyche shrouds that with something more important. \n\nWhen I ask this question to people and vent my sadness about it, people become up and arms. Therefore, I never talk about it, no matter how much it bothers me. I want to talk about these things and hopefully get over them. Please, someone explain to me what's wrong with being sad about this?", "summary": "Girl I love disappears, I've accepted that she'll be gone forever, thoughts of her having sex with others makes me sad, this pisses people off."}
{"id": "t3_2y0cif", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I [17 M] deal with my ex [17 F] (been together for 2 years and broke up a month ago)", "post": "we have been together for 2 years and it was a great relationship, we had intimate relations too, we basiclly lived in each others house and we were so happy, she loved me and I loved her.\none week (a month ago) we had crazy fights since she went to a trip and met a lot of guys and I was jealous, we had a lot of tenstion that week and there was 1 fight that just screwd everything up, we got to my house after that and we broke up, we did a mistake and she spent the night with me (our last night).\nafter that we fought a lot, we basiclly hurted eachother a lot and she told me things that are really offensive, I guess I did the same to her as well.\nnow we dont speak, if I try to speak with her she will probably block me (using whatsapp,facebook).\nI love her so much and I want to get her back and I think she loves me too but doesnt want to be with me, how do I get her back? I have to I feel, its been a month and nothing has changed, I think she still loves me but she said she doesnt want to be with me.\n\np.s: we broke up in the past, about4-5 times but always got back together, once she told me that it doesnt matter how much we are mad at each other and we will always get back together because we love each other.\n\nsorry for bad english.", "summary": "ex and I broke up a month ago, I love her a lot and want to be with her, I think she still loves me but doesnt want to be or talk to me, How do I get her back?"}
{"id": "t3_3dmc2e", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "[NSFW] TIFU by walking into our garage", "post": "Apologies in advance for shitty formatting or whatever, I'm usually just a lurker but I decided to go to the effort to make a throwaway for this.\n\nThis did happen today, unlike a lot of this page's posts, in act it happened just now. I was bored, and home alone, and decided it would be a really fun idea to go exploring our garage, where my dad usually likes to sit and smoke. It's pretty cluttered usually, but, as my parents' wedding is coming up it's been cleaned out this month. I walk in, and look around. I see what I would usually expect to see, tools, cans, used cigarettes and the like, and so I walk over to the desk. I look it over, and find that nothing out of place seems to be there until I look down and see, right underneath a small spanner, a syringe needle. I can tell that it's used, as it's pushed all the way in. My brain instantly jumps to conclusions, but I'm hesitant to believe what my instincts tell me until I look to my right and see two spoons, along with a kettle on the floor. The spoons seem stained. \n\nI'm not sure what to think, or do. I've found a weed grinder of my dad's lying around before, and I've been told that my dad has done some crazy shit in his past, so I know he's open to the idea of drug use (albeit on a much more minor scale) and I didn't care about that, but something like this has left me feeling awkward and concerned for my dad. What if I'm wrong, and the needle was used for something else? Should I ask him? Should I potentially let him continue? I know my dad's job is extremely stressful and if it's his way of coping, I don't necessarily want to stop him. All in all not a colossal fuck up but I certainly wish I hadn't been so nosy.", "summary": "TIL my dad might be a heroin user, and why you shouldn't snoop around in your parents' shit."}
{"id": "t3_3fuva3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my love interest [21 F]. I'm so confused as to what's going on!", "post": "Alright reddit So I met this girl at work, right? Gorgeous, smart, great sense of humor, the works. I strike up conversation with her and flirt with her, tease her, etc. and she's responding really well. I get her number that day. In the past week we've been texting a lot and she has had shifts at the same time as me and I've been training her in my department as she's new to it. We have the same taste in music, we both like the same kind of videogames and play them often, we both love anime, and as far as I can tell she doesn't have any faults that I personally would consider to be a deal breaker. I'm going on a date with this girl later today. \n\nI guess I don't have a question really but I have this really bad feeling in my gut since the whole dating thing has literally never once gone this well for me. I usually have to bust my ass to get the girl to think of me as anything more than a friend much less agree to go out with me. But with her, it's so easy it just feels natural. It's not complicated, I'm not having to win her trust over a long period of time, we both like the same things and have compatible personalities (which, granted, could simply be a result of our shared interest in anime and videogames), she's not playing hard to get, I mean this is just going TOO well. My roommate with whom I have been friends since elementary school even mentioned this. I don't know if I'm just jaded from all the shitty experiences I've had with women or maybe if I'm simply reading too much into it. Basically this whole thing is just going really really well for me and I'm a little freaked out by that. I don't want to slow down or anything, but still. What do you guys think? Am I reading too much into it? Do you think maybe I just lucked out and met a girl who doesn't want to suck my soul from my bones and just wants to have a nice normal relationship?? Or do you think my gut may be trying to tell me something? I'm already catching the feels for this girl pretty hard.", "summary": "Basically my romantic pursuit of this girl is going extraordinarily well and it's scaring me a bit. Should I just relax?"}
{"id": "t3_2wuai3", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being high and trying to deep fry some french fries.", "post": "Last night after smoking a joint outside I go into the kitchen to fry me up some steakhouse style fries. The fryer was already out and heated up so I made the fries in just a couple of minutes, no problem. After they were done I turned off the fryer and got them onto a plate. Here's where my fuck up begins. The problem is that when we don't need the portable fryer we put it on top of the fridge, and my problem is that I am 5'1\" so I am usually not the one to get the fryer down or put it up. In fact, I've never tried putting it back up at all. But there wasn't much space on the counter and I wanted to be considerate towards the other people in the house and put it up anyways. I managed to get it down slowly by standing on a chair before I was high, but when I went to put it back up while high I tried holding it like a waiter would hold a platter with my other hand solidly gripping the side of the wooden board that the fryer sits on. In hindsight, I should have done this after I let the oil cool down more. And it really didn't help that I was pretty baked. I put it up very slowly but when it was almost on top of the fridge the oil inside rocked the fryer from side to side and some of it came out of the top from under the lid and fell onto me. I pushed the fryer on top of the fridge without further incident but then I noticed that my chin and chest were burning. All I could think to do was put cold water all over where it hurt and try to wash the oil off. The oil hit my chin first before falling onto and into my shirt, but luckily my shirt absorbed most of it before it hit my chest. So all I got was a few mild and very annoying burns. And I pretty much spent the rest of the night reliving that event in my head and imagining what would have happened if I spilled it completely or if the oil was much hotter. The fries were delicious though.", "summary": "Went to put the deep fryer on top of the fridge after I was done with it. Spilled some hot oil on me in the process."}
{"id": "t3_yzmos", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Should I be worried someone is casing my apartment? If yes, what are my options?", "post": "Hey all, recent incidents got me thinking.\n\nI live in the suburbs of Chicago, right outside the city limit. My city is pretty nice, but there are some iffy surrounding areas. My girlfriend and I rented out a condo from the owner last May and it's been great so far, aside from a couple incidents that got me thinking.\n\nIn early August, I bought a Nexus 7, worth about $300 bucks with shipping and had it delivered to the condo. The UPS guy dropped it off in the foyer. It was swiped by the time my girlfriend got home, two hours later. I talked with the woman who signed for it and concluded that she received a package at the same time (verified) and the UPS guy applied her signature to my package. She told me that stolen packages are pretty common in this complex. Called UPS, they're still working it out, but my credit card company has already refunded me my money. Lesson learned.\n\nRight after that, the labels on our mailbox were ripped off. They were flimsy cellophane taped on, so I thought maybe they just fell off. We got a label maker and put them on again. Ripped off again within two days, though whoever did it obviously struggled with the one on the buzzer, half of it is still attached. I don't know what purpose this would have, but there you have it.\n\nThird incident was last night. I do karate Monday and Wednesday nights, and my girlfriend went to bed around 9pm. I get home around 940 and in a half asleep daze, she tells me she was hearing strange noises. Apparently after she went to bed she heard someone rattling the doorknob, loud enough for the cat to jump up and run towards the door (she's a energetic cat though). I fall asleep and figure she was just half-asleep. \n\nThis morning I talk to her a little bit more, think about all three incidents, and wonder if something else is going on. We have renter's insurance and thankfully our schedules work out so she's home in the mornings and I'm home in the evenings. We've contacted the landlord and he said he'll be in contact with a few other owners in the same building. Thoughts?", "summary": "Worried someone may be casing my girlfriend and I's rented condo. Had a package stolen, mailbox label ripped off twice and the doorknob jiggling late at night. Wondering what everyone thinks and what my options are."}
{"id": "t3_2h6khw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M 21] broke up with my girlfriend [F 21], but I think we still love eachother.", "post": "We had been together for 1,5 years, it was the first really long and serious relationship for both of us, and some days ago we broke up.\n\nTo be honest we had enough of eachothers little problems and flaws and we had no more patience for problems like this. In the last weeks we had some seroius fights and breaking up was a constant topic.\n\nNow we broke up and we are both really sad and everything. When I packed my things to move it from her, we both cried. I feel like I still love her and I think she still loves me.\n\nYet if we were together we would probably fight almost daily.\n\nI freakin don't know if we did the correct thing.\n\nHas anyone been in a situation like this? I would like to hear the consequences please.", "summary": "Broke up with gf after 1,5 years, first serious relationship for both of us, yet I think I still love her and she loves me and I don't know if we did the correct thing"}
{"id": "t3_3wr8sk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F], bridesmaid with MOH [25F], we had a pretty big blow out and I feel terrible for the bride [25]", "post": "Ok. This is super childish, I know, but I'm pretty rattled about the situation.\n\nThe MOH, Erica, has been a terrible person for the duration of the wedding planning. Without getting into too much detail, she has made every aspect of the wedding about her. In addition to this, she has really upset the bride, Ashly, with the financial aspect - Erica can't afford to be in the wedding, but had an absolute fit when she thought she wasn't going to be MOH. Erica and I were close friends for a couple years but have drifted apart due to her moving to a larger city a few hours away. \n\nSo, onto the issue at hand: \n\nI had bought a few cute outfits for Ashly's kids for Christmas. Ashly didn't know I was getting them anything, it was a surprise. I was pretty excited about the clothes, and had sent Erica a text with a picture of the outfits. \n\nSo, she texts Ashly with, \"so OP got your kids clothes for Christmas, what can I get them that's actually memorable?\". \n\nReddit, I know Ashely probably shouldn't have told me Erica said that. And I know I probably shouldn't have called out Erica on how rude she was..... But I did. I was pissed that she ruined my surprise. \n\nI could write a novel about the aftermath, but Erica flipped her shit on Ashly, and said some pretty mean stuff to her. I feel pretty bad for Ashly. Is there anything I can do to help my friend?", "summary": "maid of honour flipped her shit on the bride because I called her out on purposely ruining my Christmas present. Childish, yes, but what can I do to help my friend?"}
{"id": "t3_10de6c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "OMG Reddit,  My wife just yelled \"Wow, Better than a soap opera!\" at a pair of fighting black women in the middle of Inkster, MI. (Mainly Black Suburb of Detroit).  What idiotic moves has your SO done and how did you cope afterward?", "post": "I brought a TV home from my brothers house, An old tube type, it's about 9PM.  I need my wife's help to move it in so I ask her to come out and help.  As we are getting ready to move the TV from the car these two black women are yelling at each other from their respective houses with another house in between them.  I mean the whole street can hear their business.  I'm not listening and I'm trying to tell my wife how we are going to be moving this TV.  It's not my business.  I'm the only white dude on the block, The last thing I want to do is draw fucking attention to myself.\n\nSo I'm asking my wife if she understands, and she all of a sudden yells \"WOW, BETTER THAN A SOAP OPERA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!\"  About this time the other woman they were screaming about comes out.  Yea the one thing they did agree on was how \"Whitey bitch need to shut her mouth!!!\"\n\nMy wife understands why I'm pissed but she doesn't understand, you know, ..... WHY I'm PISSSSSED!\"\n\nSo reddit, any similar WTF type stories and how did you deal with them when the other person just didn't quite get it?", "summary": "We live in a predominately black suburb of Detroit MI, we're white, my wife decided to interject on two black women fighting over a man.  She doesn't get really why I'm mad."}
{"id": "t3_323zcb", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by thinking that someone wanted to take my picture...", "post": "Ok, so this didn't actually happen today but it still haunts me. I feel it's worthy of a TIFU.\n\nMe, my then girlfriend and two friends were on holiday together in Spain. We went to a Water Park one day and we were queuing to get it. We paid at the entrance gate and walked in...\n\nI walk through the entrance and into this big open space, where you can go off in various directions to wherever you want. I was at the front of our small group. I stopped to look around, wait for the others and decide where we should go\n\nSuddenly, I felt someone pulling at my right arm, so naturally I look to my right and see a Water Park staff member with a camera. She was saying something in Spanish and indicating towards me the universal 'photo' hand gesture with her free hand.\n\n\"Ah, she wants my picture, to capture my enjoyment at this fine establishment\"\n\nI turn to face her and strike a semi-comedic pose with a big grin...\n\nShe doesn't take a photo. \"No no no\" she says, whilst pointing behind me. I turn around and realise that I am stood directly between the photographer and 2 young children stood with someone in a giant penguin suit...\n\nFriends laughing hysterically, I walk away, with my pride well and truly bruised.", "summary": "walked through entrance to a water park, thought someone wanted to take my photo, struck a pose. I was actually stood in the way of some children and a giant penguin and they just wanted me out of the way."}
{"id": "t3_3kw7a5", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Advice on when it's financially safe to live on your own?", "post": "Hi guys, I previously lived in an apartment with an ex boyfriend, this apartment was a dream for the monthly price we were paying alas the relationship ended and I had to move back home with my parents. Technically I make enough a month to afford my own apartment priced around 1200 a month but that would leave me with almost nothing being saved which to me isn't worth moving out quite yet. A friend of mine said her friend is going through a divorce and moving out, that she's looking to find a roommate to make the rent cost around $600. As much as I loved the idea of being on my own, I'm scared to be on my own with another person again there are many financial matters that can go wrong. Advice?", "summary": "friends looking for a roommate, nervous after previous experience with having to move out and lose a lot of money invested in that particular apartment"}
{"id": "t3_2js39m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [26 M] have a problem with my girlfriend's [29 F] stalker ex from high school.", "post": "I've been dating my girlfriend for about 5 months now, and she told me about her stalker ex that started trying to contact her again recently - I'm worried for her safety.\n\nAccording to her it's an ex from high school. They didn't have a good breakup and that was around 10 years ago - basically she was date-raped by him, and she had to get an abortion.\n\nHowever, apparently that guy recently divorced his wife and is trying to get in touch with my girlfriend + with my girlfriend's high school friends and asking where she lives and what her contact details are.\n\nShe's already blocked the guy from facebook and email phone etc.\n\nAs her boyfriend, I'm worried about her and don't know what should be done.\n\nIn addition, I'm living in Japan, and Japanese police are horrible with these kinds of situations - they'll provide no help at all for these kind of issues.\n\nWhat do you recommend if this was your situation?", "summary": "living in Japan, my gf's ex is a stalker, and potentially a danger. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1oqfoi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "my (28M) friend is in an abusive controlling relationship (22F). how can we make him see the big picture", "post": "So my (28M) friend is in a controlling abusive relationship with (22F). She doesn't like any of his friends and does everything in her power to keep him from hanging out with any of us. She will tell him she's cool with whatever plans at first, then day of comes and she makes him cancel. He's now bailed on three best friend birthday parties(one tonight), 13 dinner parties that we throw as a group twice a month, isn't allowed to come and hangout at any of our homes,  and now isn't even allowed to text or call us. If he does go against her and go out, she will call him 100 times throughout the night to guilt him into going home. She did this on my birthday- she's been invited also to all of these events- and I ended up confiscating his phone for the evening so he could enjoy himself for once. \n\nTwo weeks into their dating my bf, this friend and I went on a road trip to another province for two weeks we'd planned a year prior. She called him 100 times a day tryin to guilt him into coming home. She even booked a plane ticket to come join our trip but couldn't get a babysitter nor time off- thank god because that would've been awkward when she'd show up and we'd have no room for her in either the car or the three man tent we were using. \n\nAlso she will trash talk him to anyone who'll listen. My bestie and I brought her out on girls night and she spent all night telling us how she's embarrassed by him, he has such a small dick, he's bad in bed.. Goes on and on. I should've recorded it and shown him. \n\nYou can tell he is truly miserable, but thinks he loves her so he won't leave. How can we make him realize how unhappy he really is and how psycho she is?", "summary": "my (28M) friend is in a relationship with a controlling psycho(22F). How can we make him realize how miserable he is in the relationship and how controlling she really is."}
{"id": "t3_4tgdtj", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "College and Mortgaging a Home", "post": "Hello everyone,\n\nI'm currently a 19-year-old college student and I'm finishing up my Associate's degree at a local community college in New York. Because this is a college within the SUNY system, my credits transfer almost perfectly to any of the other institutions within it, which is what I plan on doing.\n\nThe only problem is, campus housing is incredibly expensive. The university I was looking at has relatively inexpensive tuition ($10k/year) but housing will be appx. $1,000/month plus $500/month for the university's mandatory meal plan. \n\nI have a brief credit history (720, ~6 months) but don't plan on moving for about 10 months or so. Mortgages near the university run about $350-$400 a month for smaller, 2 bedroom homes. Obviously, I'd need to pay for insurance, food, electricity, internet, and save money for repairs, but would it be wise or even possible to do this at my age and with my credit history? \n\nI'd rather buy than rent, since it would feel much less like throwing money away, and I plan on staying in the area indefinitely even after I've earned a Bachelor's or Master's degree.", "summary": "19-year-old college student, short credit history, can I mortgage an inexpensive home rather than rent on-campus?"}
{"id": "t3_39w1p6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "20/M: New to dating, forever alone not wanted", "post": "Alrighty so I'm a 20 year old guy, I don't think too bad looking, and have admittedly very little experience (technically none before recently) when it comes to dating and even meeting people (women in my case). I've been using OKC for a couple months, I send messages to girls I have interest in every once in a while when I discover her profile, but generally pretty limited to zero response. Plus, a lot of profiles here locally (Sacramento-ish area of CA) seem to be ghosts, as in not logged into in a long time, and the few that are active and interesting remain quiet when I attempt to break the ice(burgs).\n\nAbout a week and a half ago, a girl randomly messaged me for once, seemed pretty interested, she wasn't bad looking, and we ended up going to lunch the weekend after, and after a week of chatting daily. That was Saturday, and now today she's gone pretty silent aside from one message after I asked her how her day was going. Plus her message seemed unusually rushed, she had previously been much more talkative. Bleh. Thought all went well in person, but perhaps not.\n\nI'm probably rushing through stuff way to fast (or not, again, no idea), but aside from online sites, whats the best way to go about meeting new people? I've heard the grocery store is up there, guess I've never really paid attention.\n\nI think the rush comes from everyone around me (family, friends) finding people, and I'm pretty much the only one aboard on the \"forever alone\" train, and I'm getting more and more tired of this train. I'd ask family for this kind of advice, but it's not really viable in my situation :/\n\nNote: also posted (very slightly differently) in /r/dating. Just wanted to maximize responses that I may not get from one or the other. If I've broken the geneva code or anything similar I'll delete one.", "summary": "20 years old, minuscule amount of meeting/dating experience, want to change that and get off the forever alone bus."}
{"id": "t3_2ipdwt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my ex [20F] had a son together. Was together 2 years broke up. Can't get over her", "post": "Basically I was with my ex girlfriend for over 2 years and I was madly in love with her (still am) I just can't get over her even though we broke up over a year and a half ago. It isn't as easy as cutting off all contact with her because I want nothing more than to be a good father to my son so that means constant contact. I think about her every single day and knowing that she doesn't feel the same way crushes me and send me into a state of depression.\n\nI feel like there is no one else out there. Sometimes it gets to the point I feel like dis appearing for good. I have nobody to talk to. All my time is spent up with working during the week and then spending time with my son at weekends so my social life is thst no existent I'd go so far as to say I have no friends. I just feel I'd be better off not being around  \n\nWhat hurts the most it was such a stupid reason we broke up. I know she is over me because I've tried to tell her how I feel and she has just knocked me back and told me she doesn't feel the same way. Even writing this has knocked me for six.", "summary": "Can't get over the mother of my son. Making me feel depressed. Can't cut out contact because I want to be a good father. Have no one to talk too. She is over me."}
{"id": "t3_qnopa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Roommate ethical situation", "post": "So I have a roommate that plays hockey.  He leaves his hocky bag, which on a good day doesn't really smell, and on a bad day smells like shit, in the living room/tv room.  It's tucked out of the way and in no way a physical obstruction but it assaults the olfactory senses like none other.  Is it too much for the remaining 4 roommates to ask him to keep it in his room or somewhere else that isn't as commonly used by the other 4 roommates.  \n\nI've already confronted him about it and he claims:\na.) His room is too small\nb.) I need to stop being a douche and a cocky, little Korean\nc.) We're all ganging up on him, being inconsiderate to his needs, and we're imposing our will on him\n\nI claim (and I think it's safe to say I speak for everyone else in the house): \na.) His bag is unpleasant smelling\nb.) It is unreasonable that he thinks he is special or above everyone else in that he can keep his smelly hockey bag in the common room\nc.) He is everything that is wrong with America\n\n*He's a redneck-wanna-be, an adament libertarian, and a supporter of Rick Santorum.  I think this is where he gets this notion that the individual (himself) comes before the collective (our House) and the idea that the \"Group\" or the governing body imposes its will on him (the lone indivdual) and suppresses his freedoms.", "summary": "my roommate leaves his smelly gym equipment in the living room and we (4 other roommates) want him to keep it in his room but he refuses to put it any other place"}
{"id": "t3_1l0map", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [60F] mother is making me [23M] miserable", "post": "Some background:\nMy mother is 10 years divorced and has no relationship with her family (who lives across the country). She is very much alone in this world. She has been diagnosed with histrionic personality disorder.\n\n---\n\nEvery time I have tried to leave home or start a relationship, my mother works to do everything in her power to irritate my partner or threaten me to return. If I leave the house to take a call or meet someone, she is suddenly \"concerned for my safety\" and will proceed to blow up my phone and threaten a wellness check.\n\n---\n\nI don't know how to get out of this situation, it has driven me into a deep depression and I have begun to get extremely angry. It is destroying my very few relationships and has made me feel very alone.", "summary": "My mother is obsessive, needy and does what she can to make it hard to leave. I feel guilty about leaving her and don't know how to get out..."}
{"id": "t3_s6ll0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the strangest thing that has ever showed up to your home uninvited? (possibly NSFW)", "post": "This story takes place when I was about 13 years old, and living in a neighborhood in the not-so-great part of town.\n\nI was just about to climb in bed at about 11:30 one night when I heard this \"BAMBAMBAM\" from the backyard. I assumed it was just my dog screwing around, so I yelled \"shut up, dog!\" and continued getting in bed. When the noise persisted, I decided to look out my window to see what was going on.\n\nBig mistake.\n\nTo my horror, I was viewing a rather large, middle-aged nude woman banging on my sliding glass door. She had her whole muddy body pressed up against the glass, yelling to \"let her in\". I was pretty shocked and so were my parents when they came out. They were well aware that this woman was obviously under the influence of some crazy drugs, so we ended up calling the police. When the cops showed up, the lady took off to the right of my street, and the cops went in the opposite direction. My family decided we'd had enough adventure for the night and we all went to bed. \n\nThe next morning, I walked outside in front of my house to find this lady's clothes bundled up in my driveway. She had disrobed in my driveway, walked casually into my front yard, opened the gate and walked into my back yard, and then proceeded to freak out.\n\nAnd for all the people who are thinking that I'm a jerk for not letting her in and assisting her, I was 13 at the time. I had no idea what to do, and my parents had called the cops before I could even react. Plus, she probably would have ended up in police custody anyway. Meth is a hell of a drug.", "summary": "One night, this messed up tweeker lady decided to disrobe in my driveway and walk around my front yard to my back yard and start banging on the sliding glass door of our house before taking off when the cops were called."}
{"id": "t3_cddcd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So my boss bet me I couldn't get access to his wireless router without his help...I know I can do it, but I need a little help.", "post": "Details:\nIts a Linksys WRT54GS.\nWhat I have learned is that the password is the default 'admin'.\nThey have a mac address filter but this only filters internet access.\nThey have a WPA which is just a string of letters and numbers that i dont know...i would need to steal this once i log in.\nWhat im worried about is if they have an ip filter, how do i get it to talk to me so i can log into it. like i said the password is 'admin' so i just need to get to a login prompt and im good. the only way i know how to do this is by the standard ip address of 192.168.1.1 (which is the one they use).\nDoes anybody have any advice? I need to win this bet, because I know his network is vulnerable.", "summary": "I know the login password, but not the WPA key. How can I get to a login prompt if they have an ip filter?"}
{"id": "t3_2z6c35", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20/m] need help on learning how to not be clingy. Don't want to ruin a great relationship with current girlfriend [20/f]", "post": "Okay, so I've finally come to the conclusion that I am clingy. I guess I've finally matured enough to realize this. I'm fairly certain my current girlfriend doesn't think so, however, because I've really, really kept it under control to where she probably hasn't noticed. We've only been dating for about two months though, so it's only a matter of time before she does. I REALLY, REALLY like her a lot and don't want to drive her away so this is where I need your help.\n\nI know I'm clingy when it comes to texting. If I don't get a response within a few hours or so, I get very antsy and worried. I haven't done anything silly like text her twice or anything, but I could use advice on how to just chill.\n\nI'm also clingy, I think, when it comes to making plans. A lot of times she'll ask me to come hang out, but then get busy before I'm able to. Thus, we'll plan to hang out after she's done with what made her busy. However, she usually doesn't update me on whether we'll still be able to hang out or not so I start getting really anxious and a little hurt that she wasn't considerate enough to let me know that I didn't need to reserve time for her.\n\nI may also be clingy when it comes to feelings and such. I honestly know that I fall hard and fast for girls that return my affections. Thus, I usually want to shower them with affections and complements. I've been keeping it under control, but could use some advice on how to compliment/apply affection more tactfully.", "summary": "I'm clingy/have relationship anxiety and could use help on learning how to chill the hell out so I don't drive her away"}
{"id": "t3_1krjmn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[25/F] with my fianc\u00e9 [26M] of 3 years, he thinks I'm too controlling with the money, I think he's too reckless with spending. Big arguments ensue. What do I do?", "post": "Basically, my fiance has a tendency to spend money.. Little bits here and there and then sometimes the large thing (though he does discuss them with me beforehand)\n\nSo we can keep atop of our finances and save something every month, I've set a strict budget for food, bills and spending money. I also budget \u00a3150 a month each for personal spending.\n\nHowever, he has already 'spent' that and about 6 months of future monthly spending allowance on a football season ticket and a new model dyson Hoover (that he insisted we needed as we'd had our old Hoover for a year already....) obviously I said that was crazy, so he opted to use his personal money to buy it.\n\nHowever, he has now pretty much maxed out his personal spending and we've had a few arguments over him being allowed to spend a bit more on bits and bobs and that he has every right to spend a bit more if he wishes.\n\nI understand he's put himself into a corner - and doesn't now have money to spend on little purchases like CDs or games.  However I feel like I'm being punished for being good with my finances and end up having to give him some of my spending money, rather than taking it out of the saver.\n\nI should add, he does earn more than me so maybe he feels its his right that he spends money how he likes. \n\nBut I like to save and think its healthy for the future....\n\nHow do we stop the arguments?", "summary": "fianc\u00e9 wants to spend more money, I want to save more money and not keep giving him some of mine. We argue lots over it (even though we would both like to save for a holiday fund!)"}
{"id": "t3_2vmk7p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [21] Girlfriend [20] of nearly 3 years, said she needed a break", "post": "Fairly straight forward really, for awhile now She and I have been at different points throughout our relationship where I would be distant and she would be clingy and vice versa. Recently I started a new job and a broken car which takes away a lot of time that we can spend together and I have been fairly clingy with how little I get to see her. She's been stressed out with her job and classes and I didn't help the situation. Earlier this night, we had plans to hangout and I was telling her my plan for Valentines day that I had been working out for awhile now, she interrupted me and said she needed a break because she's not happy and that we've at different places for awhile now and she's not sure if she see's a future for us. \n\nI will respect her wishes for space but I love her and I'm frightened I'm going to lose her. I'm aware of my mistakes and I really want to try to make amends and try to repair our relationship. I just don't know what to do.", "summary": "Girlfriend wants a break because she doesn't see a future together at the moment and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_331q7g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[27 yo F] dating [26 yo M]: feeling weird about boyfriend's deceased ex-gf", "post": "I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years. His ex-gf (first love) who he was still friends with but wanted to date again died about 3 years ago. He has a tattoo in memory of her and art and things she made him hung up in his room and car. The first year we dated was touch and go as to if he was ready to be in a relationship. I tried to be there for him as much as I could but it was hard for a beginning of a relationship. We have since moved forward and are in a very good place. I had been OK with her things everywhere because I knew it was understandable....he was grieving and it was not my place. Now we are moving in together and I feel weird having her things hung up in our place. We got in an argument about it and he got angry and said I shouldn't feel weird about her stuff and that I should look at it like these are things in memory of his friend, not ex. Am I being insensitive or is this understandable?", "summary": "BF wants to hang up things his deceased ex-gf made him in our new place. How should I feel about this?"}
{"id": "t3_1040de", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "Holy shit. I think I'm going to get back with him[f 21, m26]", "post": "Before the summer started I met a very intelligent, kind man at a local bar. We were instantly very interested/attracted to one another, but I soon realized that he had a lot of baggage from past relationships. He had been cheated on by two other girls, who he promptly cheated on in return. He told me that for 7 years, he didn't have a girlfriend, just FWBs here and there for awhile. After a month of dating, I went on an overseas trip to visit family. He stayed in town and promptly cheated on me with one of his old FWBs. Something seemed off, so I broke up with him(only AFTER breaking up with him did he tell me about is FWB). He was pretty harsh during the breakup, telling me that he didn't mean to hurt anyone by it, and saying that it was no big deal. When I came back to town, three months later, he texted me out of the blue, asking me to hang out with him. I ignored his message. But I miss him, a lot. I want to get back with him. All my friends/family warned me about him, but I just don't give a fuck.", "summary": "this is a bad idea and I know it, but I miss him so much that I want him. Any final thoughts that may switch my opinion?"}
{"id": "t3_4ux9kr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My[25m] friend[25m] is dating[26f] a girl I used to sleep with, he is asking me for sex advice because she is being a prude with him... not sure what to say here.", "post": "One of my ex-roommates is dating a girl that I used to be friends with benefits with two years  ago. Just to quickly describe our sex life, this girl was down for anything. She offered to do anal with me, (wasn't interested), I would usually finish on her face. We would fuck a lot, and she was really orgasmic. \n\nHere is where things get messy and complicated. I had a roommate and now we both work in the same field and we  work at the same company but different areas. However, we have been having lunch together. He has brought up his girlfriend in conversation and I realize that it was the same girl that I used to sleep with. \n\nHe asks me for advice mainly because he thinks of me as being good with women (I am not really all that great myself just better than him). He has told me that his girlfriend and him started having sex two months ago and she made him wait five months. He has been asking me about advice on how to get his girlfriend to open up in bed. He says their sex life is really dull, she doesn't want to give him a blow job, doesn't want to do any position besides doggie and missionary, and any of that other stuff completely off limits. \n\nI don't really know what to say to him. I haven't told him that I slept with her, because I don't want this to go awkward. I think a lot what is going on is cultural, and I should just step out of the way (they are both Indian/Hindus). My worry though is that if he finds out that I have been hiding it from him that he might get angry at me. I am not sure what to do help out please.", "summary": "ex-roommate is dating a girl that I used to date. She did a lot of stuff with me, but is a prude with him. Not sure what to say to him."}
{"id": "t3_2g057c", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (24 m) am unsure if she (22 f) is physically attracted to me. Should I break up with her?", "post": "Hey all, I was hoping to get some dating advice about a tricky situation I have gotten myself into over the last month.  I have been dating an awesome, attractive girl for about a month now who is exactly my type and see her every other day ~15 dates. We have been doing everything together including 3 day camping trips, cooking dinner for each other, and other various activities.\n\nOf course when I think that I found the perfect girl there has to be a problem.  This one started when we first started seeing each other and she said that she wanted to take it slow as far as waiting to have sex (that's fine).  I have to admit that I am crazy attracted to this girl and it takes every effort that I have to not touch and kiss her every time I see her.  She says i'm perfect for her and shows no lack of interest other than sexual.\n\nSo we waited around 12ish dates until we finally slept together on a camping trip.  This was two weekends ago and shes back to not sleeping with me, not handsy, etc etc.  The sex was ok, but it felt very passive and kind of just seemed like she was appeasing me.\n\nNow I really like this girl.  But no sex in a relationship is just something that I don't think I can live with right now.  She makes me feel guilty and whenever I try to go below the belt she will say something snooty like \"can I help you?\" She is by no means inexperienced and has had double the partners I have (~20) so I do not believe that is the issue.  The only thing I can think is that she is not attracted to me in the physical sense.  If this is already an issue so early on I can't help but think what it would be like in 6 months to a year.  What should I do?", "summary": "Awesome girl, I don't think she is attracted to me.  Not sure if I should break up with her."}
{"id": "t3_3ea4k7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17 M] can't think of a way to thank my fathers boss [?? F] for her support.", "post": "I've never had a \"big\" family here in the US, most of my relatives are back in my parents' country. However I did have some connections with my parents relatives, friends & other close people. One of them is my fathers boss, she's wealthy, I don't know too much about her.\n\nEvery year for Christmas she would buy our family presents, she does it for other people too but the fact she does it in general is what is thoughtful. Its been about 8-10 years now and she still asks my father annually what I want for Xmas. I always give her a call thanking her a lot, but I feel like its not enough. \n\nJust now my Mom gave me an envelope and told me it was from my dads boss. Inside the envelope was a card and had a little note congratulating me for my academic success in High School. There's also a check for $250, when I saw it I just couldn't believe it. I mean, I feel like I don't deserve it but I'm absolutely grateful for it.\n\nNow tomorrow I'm going to give her another one of those thank you calls, but I also want to do something more. Should I write her a letter too with a post card? Idk, she's in her 60's and I've no clue what she likes because idk anything about her.", "summary": "my dads boss wrote me a check for $250 sealed in an envelope with a card because I graduated from high school. Need thoughts on how I can show her how much I'm thankful rather than just saying it."}
{"id": "t3_wabbt", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what was the hardest thing you had to say to your parent(s)?", "post": "Today I just received the most heartbreaking news that I have to soon deliver to my dad. Both of his parents died when he was in high school, and throughout his middle years his 2 brothers died, leaving him only with his sister. I just got a call that his sister had a heart attack and just passed away. Since his sister was the last blood relative left of my dad's family, I can't even bring myself to tell him of the news. It is by far one of the hardest things I've had to tell my any of my parents. What was the hardest thing you had to tell them?", "summary": "Both of my dad's parents and all but one of his siblings has passed away. His last sibling just passed away and I have to deliver him of the news."}
{"id": "t3_i8ijm", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can you prove that I'm stupid?", "post": "So I use a website for work that has a logic based Captcha system for their WAP site where you're supposed to pick the odd word out. Normally, there would be sets such as:\n\n[Monday, Tuesday, Sunday, Uranus], [sociology, mathematics, chemistry, atlanta, biology, astronomy], [latin, lacrose, lizard, recliner, lexus, learn]\n\nYou get the idea. So today I run across this one:\n\n[blue, black, twelve, twenty]\n\nI choose twenty because it's the only one without an L. Wrong. I then chose one of the others, I don't remember which, and was told I was wrong again. After two wrong answers it logs you out and you have to log in again. Given that this is time sensitive, I was pissed and called the support line for the website. The conversation went something like this:\n\nGirl: Hello?\nMe: I'd like to report a problem with the captcha on your WAP site.\nG: Oh, yes. We've had other people tell us it's too hard.\n\nAt this point I got more annoyed and the conversation deteriorated. At some point she tells me that while she cant figure it out either, shes positive there is a correct answer. Reddit, please tell me which one that is, and more importantly, why!", "summary": "Can you pick the odd one out? (it's not twenty, I picked it for it's lack of L."}
{"id": "t3_54fnl1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by dreaming", "post": "This one actually happened today, maybe four hours ago to be precise. My girlfriend and I have a very healthy sexual relationship. We're both open to trying things at least once and love to experiment with new ways of getting each other off. \n\nOne request I've always had but has never worked is the infamous alarm cock blowjob. She's open to the idea but I'm such a light sleeper any alarm she sets just ruins the surprise aspect. Low and behold this morning she woke up before me naturally. \n\nShe starts getting frisky while I'm deep in the dream cycle of sleep. As she starts fondling the boys and going to town I find myself 'waking up' naked in a camping store, full of customers. One old man in particular saw something funny going on under the blanket and died laughing. \n\nPanic mode sets in and as I look down I see that I'm no longer wearing my regular shoes. I have an army boot on one foot and powerlace nikes on the other. Frantically I begin searching the camping store for my shoes. When that fails I at decide I at least need to find one that matches one of the two I'm already wearing. They are nowhere to be found and I'm far too broke to buy new boots and a pair of powerlace nikes. Somewhere around here the panic hits a peak and I actually wake up, jump out of bed screaming I have to find my shoes. \n\nThe girlfriend is utterly confused and a little miffed at the result of her very generous sexual favor. She died laughing when I explained though.", "summary": "Ruined my first real chance at a longstanding sexual fantasy by unnecessarily panicking about shoes. I gusss call me Suzan now."}
{"id": "t3_26pai9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] good friend [19F] has a very unhealthy view of her previous relationship", "post": "My friend is absolutely convinced that \"nobody understands the love\" she had for her ex-boyfriend [19M]. They had a pretty standard break up when he came to college, but instead of actually breaking up they were \"committed to\" each other while he tried talk to other girls. He has some pretty serious issues (would get up in the middle of the night and yell/kick stuff, got kicked out of college in his first year for drugs) and was very mean to my her during their breakup. He was her first serious relationship.\n\nShe can't seem to get over him or that mentality that they had something incredibly special that nobody else can understand. Nothing I say seems to get through to her and she just got angry the times we did talk about it. Does anyone have experience helping someone get over that hump?", "summary": "My friend is stuck believing that her last relationship was a special snowflake and I am at a loss as to how to help her."}
{"id": "t3_3p85xu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21M] play League of Legends with my friend [24M], but I'm not having fun playing with him anymore.", "post": "We've been friends for around nine years now, and I love hanging out with him. He's funny, smart, and very supportive of me. \n\nThe only problem is that we can't seem to play a game of League of Legends without him getting extremely angry. He starts shouting and pitching a fit if he's not doing well, and it makes the game unenjoyable.\n\nI am a firm proponent of the idea that anything can be solved with open, honest communication--and I've tried it. But when I bring it up, he just gets upset. He says that I'm \"throwing him under the bus\" and things like that, and the conversation never goes anywhere.\n\nAt this point, I feel like the only option is to tell him that I don't want to play League with him anymore, but I don't know how to tell him that without making things worse.", "summary": "Friend gets mad at video games, makes them no fun to play. How do I fix this, or what's the best way to tell him that I don't want to play with him anymore?"}
{"id": "t3_34cxo3", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I'm tired of being defined by my ex.", "post": "My ex and I dated for a year and 3 months or so, and before that we were best friends for three years. We're about to end high school and the break up hasn't been too terrible but people still define us as a couple and I know that really annoys him. (We broke up because he didn't want to help me through my depression and anxiety anymore). So now it's the end of senior year and we're picking colleges and we're down between the same two. He picks and doesn't tell me (which is fine), and I finally make a decision tonight. I end up picking the same university that my ex picked without my knowing. I tell my best friend, who immediately asks me if I'm going to this university just because my ex is. No, I'm not. I'm going there because I picked it. I'm going there because they have a better program of what I want to learn. My decisions are because of what I want, not his or anyone else's. I'm tired of being defined as I do whatever everyone else does or wants. He is himself, and I am me. I am me. I make my decisions and decide my future. Only me.", "summary": "I unknowingly picked the same college as my ex and my best friend thought it was because I wanted to follow him. This is not true. I'm tired of being defined like that."}
{"id": "t3_10zvvr", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How can I [22m] approach dating a [17f]?", "post": "I need honest opinions on how to go about dating someone who is barely underage without ruffling too many feathers. Just to give you a little insight into the situation, we've been talking for about a month now, but haven't gotten into anything too serious yet. I'm a 22 year old male, never really had a serious relationship that lasted longer than a month, and am a virgin. She is 17 years old, turns 18 next summer, and is clearly interested in me. In the past couple of years, I've kind of come out of my ugly duckling stage and become moderately attractive and this girl is one of those that I never would have had a chance with in high school. Smoking body, athletic, and has to fight guys off with a stick. How do I deal with parents? If she's cool with sex, do I go through with it, or do I wait until she's 18 to be safe? What legal, social and emotional ramifications am I looking at? Thanks.", "summary": "After a lot of talking, I'm about to take it to the next level with with a 17 year old, and need to know what to expect."}
{"id": "t3_4zpcjv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18] with my friend [17] who wants to bang my crush's friend [17]", "post": "Let me start off by saying that I know this isn't as important as other people's problems here but I need some advice on how to proceed on this situation.\n\nSo currently I have a crush on a girl from my school and things are actually going great. We're not there yet but we currently are really good friends and things seem to be moving towards better. A couple of months ago one of my friends keep telling me that he thinks my crush's friend is very pretty so I adviced him to write to either ask her out or start talking to her on facebook. He thought asking her out was a bit weird so they started talking and have been ever since. \n\nEver since they started talking, my crush told me that her friend has a little thing for my friend and I thought that was great. But a few days ago I overheard my friend saying that he just wants to have sex with her cause she is hot and then move on to the next girl. I of course told him to tell the girl now and not just use her emotions in his favor but he refuses so I said that if he doesn't and they ask me about his feelings I will tell them the truth. He got kind of mad and said that it's his business and that if I do that then he won't ever speak to me again. And of course any other guy in the class has sided with him saying that I don't know how to be a good friend.\n\nSo I just wanted to ask, do you think that I tell the girls the truth if they ever ask me about his intentions or should I lie for his sake as everyone else says?", "summary": "My friend wants to bang my crush's friend and plans to use her feelings to his advantage. Don't know if I should tell them the truth about his intentions or not."}
{"id": "t3_3u2fg9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23F] girlfriend got a booty call a couple of weeks ago and doesn't think it's a big deal.", "post": "I had a conversation with my girlfriend last night about her *friend* Adam. She worked with him when she was 17 and they slept together once then she left town for about 4 years travelling and studying.\n\nAccording to her they kept in touch on Facebook and texting and her last boyfriend hated this.\n\nAbout 18 months ago she moved back home to study a masters and her and Adam hooked up a few times. She says she told him after the last time she didn't want to sleep with him again.\n\nThey went for lunch and coffee a few times around the time her and I got together but every time he tried to persuade her to come back to his place and have sex.\n\nIn the 9 months we've been together they've not been in contact until a couple of weeks ago when he text her at 4am on a Saturday clearly hoping for a shag.\n\nI trust my girlfriend 100% and I know she'd never cheat on me. The issue is she still thinks Adam is her friend.\n\nShe says he really took care of her when she was younger and they worked together and I think he's fixed her car a few times but he crosses a line when he texts my girlfriend for sex.\n\nThey may have been friends previously but whatever that was their relationship now is deeply unhealthy.\n\nShe says it's fine because she'll never sleep with him again but this is not how friends should treat each other and he's not only being incredibly disrespectful to her but also to me.\n\nWould I be in my rights to tell her she needs to cut him out of her life altogether?", "summary": "My girlfriend got a 4am text from a previous hookup. She thinks it's ok because they used to be friends."}
{"id": "t3_3ctm4p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (26m) have a huge crush on girlfriends best friend.", "post": "5 year old relationship, me (26m) and girlfriend (27f). Like title says, I have a huge crush on my girlfriend's(27f) best friend (27f), and I believe that she is a little attracted to me. Every time we get drunk, we end up grinding if we're dancing, or just really touchy if we're not. She's a naturally sexual person, and I find her very sexy. I'm very scared to explore any kind of avenue with her, and I'm thinking arms length might be the right distance for us. I love my girlfriend, but I'm not getting enough love or sex from her. The best friend constantly talks about sex, and is always trying to date men but they never work out for some reason or another. I'm a very sexual person; I love having sex and require it a lot, my partner is very low libido. \n\nShe always asks me why I don't know anyone just like me. I'm super conflicted. I don't know what's what anymore. Should I make a move? I'd hate myself but at least I'd be satisfied.", "summary": "I'm very sexual, gf isn't. Best friend is hinting imo of sexy times. Pursue or don't be scum?"}
{"id": "t3_1mnz8f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "When discussing life goals, how would you guys interpret...", "post": "Me [25M], her [21F]\n\nBesides the the fact that she was telling me she loved me within the 1st month, talking marriage within 3 months, discussing having kids and living together within 6 months, talking about spending the rest of her life with me on the 8th month, promptly breaking up with me on the 9th month, in a new relationship by the 11th month, and has currently been living with the new guy (who is 32) since the 13 month.\n\nI have heard from so many different people that this is a red flag and that I should have seen it... When discussing life goals, her only ambition was that she only wanted to get married, have a family, and be a stay at home mom.", "summary": "What do you think about someone who's only ambition is to get married, have a family, and be a stay at home mom?"}
{"id": "t3_3uvsbl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my Girlfriend [19 F] of one month, am concerned that I'm setting myself up for pain", "post": "So like the title suggests, I've been in a relationship with a girl for a month (Megan). We hit it off really well, and I know that were both in the infatuation stage of our relationship but I haven't been able to be this open with someone before. I just feel really comfortable around her because we're so similar.\n\nShe had a rough childhood, and has been battling depression since then. I know that it has shaded Megan's ability to actually trust and get into a relationship because she learned to only rely on herself growing up.\n\nMegan is beginning to have second thoughts about our relationship because she feels like she'll \"fuck me up\", and doesn't want to lose me as a friend. I told her that she shouldn't be scared of our relationship, and that we both know that we work together. She then agreed with me, but warned me that this type of thing might keep on happening.\n\nSo my question to everyone is this:Am I setting myself up for pain? I realize that there is an age gap, and I also realize that it isnt a good thing that we are already having a conversation like this when we just started. But she is also being honest and up front with everything, which is incredibly important to me.", "summary": "Girlfriend of a month is afraid of \"fucking me up\" and doesn't want to lose me as a friend. How concerned should I be?"}
{"id": "t3_1n7b0z", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "The moment I've dreaded my entire weight loss journey is finally here.", "post": "I got some interesting news today. I was getting new tires put on my car and the mechanic told me it would take an hour to do so I walked down the street to get some water. I passed this laser liposuction/skin tightening spa and decided since I have an hour to kill and a some skin sag from losing 130lbs I'd see what that's all about. During my consultation the doctor looked at my stomach and said verbatim \"My technique will do nothing for you, you need a tummy tuck.\" The way he explained it was that there is not enough fat on my stomach to make his technique viable. So in short... this actually may all be skin on me and I may be DONE losing weight. The only places he said he knew he could do anything were my love handles and chest. I'm going to get a real medical BMI scan before I make any moves on this so I have hard numbers as to what is actually where but like I said earlier, those numbers could reveal that I'm done with weight loss and it's time to start managing my skin better. I'd just like to point out that I'm not going to do a tummy tuck, down time from that could cost me my job and is just unmanageable (Not to mention invasive surgery scares the shit out of me). This could be a big turning point in my journey and I don't want to take it blindly.Does anyone know anything I could be doing short term to help this out? or any techniques I am overlooking? If I can avoid surgery of any kind I'd like to but if not this seems like the best option right now.", "summary": "Found out I may actually be done losing weight because there is no fat on me just skin so now I need to start seriously taking care of this skin sag problem non-invasively. advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2gmvrk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] haven't heard from the guy [26/M] I've been seeing for the past 2.5 months in a few days...feeling confused", "post": "I've been seeing this guy I met at a local bar for around 2.5 months now. Things have been good-we have not put a label on anything, but we've been seeing each other once or twice a week (he travels for work and I just started a new job, so we're both pretty busy) and have had a great time. He has-based on general enthusiasm while being around me and physical affection-given me the impression that he is into me and I am happy to take it slow as far as labels and such go. This weekend,  he cancelled a date we had planned and after I said I wasn't free later that weekend because I had a work meeting to prepare for, he stopped texting me back. We do usually talk a bit via text every day and he often initiates these conversations, but it's been radio silence for 3 days now, after he didn't text me back over the weekend.\n\nLast year, I got out of a 4 year relationship, so I am pretty new to the dating game and feeling a bit confused.  I don't know if I am overthinking this because I like the guy or if something is up and I should consider asking him about it. Any insight or advice would greatly be appreciated, Reddit!", "summary": "Guy I have been dating for 2.5 months has stopped texting after cancelling plans over the weekend. Feeling confused."}
{"id": "t3_4wkrj2", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I just discovered my British coworkers internet history: His hobby is being abusive to American women online. I'm an American woman", "post": "Holy shit.\nAnyway, we have been working together for about a year. Thank goodness his online behavior predates his knowing me. Anyway, he has always been polite to me. I am married and am busy with a toddler, so perhaps I haven't really been affected by his unfriendliness. Prior to this morning I would have told you that he is aloof, distant, and wants his own life. Nothing out of the ordinary. I'm a married woman with a homelife and he's a single guy living the bachelor life, nothing more than that. I knew he was kinda unfriendly but didn't read much into it, as our work paths don't cross much and he leaves me alone.\n\nThis morning I was browsing forums related to our area of work and recognized a post from him: no mistake; we are in the same narrow field. Without a doubt it is him. I went through his comment history.\nPredating his meeting me, he has a history of seeking out American women in our field on the internet and being abusive to them. Most of the self-identified American women on the 'net he is responding to are seeking advice or help; he is responding to them with hatred and vitriol and derision, I don't think I can type the words he is using and not get caught by the filter, but, he is using all of the typical anti-American slurs and all of the typical anti-female slurs. Dude is really. REALLY full of anger. Like: holy crap: he hates American women with the force of a million suns. He appears to spend every Sunday looking for American women on various internet forums relative to our field and being toxic to them. And his history of doing this under this internet nic goes back several years.\n\nAnyway, I'm not going to do anything at work but ignore him and continue to be polite to him, but: oh my god.", "summary": "my coworker is an unhinged hatebeast and I am the object of his hatred. Yes, I work in Europe."}
{"id": "t3_2s8b3l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [21/f] slept over in the same bed [22/m] with me and nothing happened. does it mean anything when a woman sleeps in the same bed with you?", "post": "Long story short, I was sobering up the other night by the time I got home. I offered to let her stay on my bed instead of getting the couch like she normally gets. Instead I quickly changed my mind and asked her if she could scoot over. She happily obliged. Nothing happened though, and we were really tired so we just passed out.\n\nNow, she could have told me that she would just take the couch, or could have just said no. And I would have been absolutely fine with that. It's just that the couch was half way across the house, and my bed was just there, and I was within the past few hours, heavily drinking. \n\nThe next morning she said \"I realized I could have just slept on the couch.\" I didn't comment on it, but she did say during the night I kind of got closer to her. She said she didn't mind.\n\nDoes this mean anything? I mean, the last time I was in bed with a woman, we ended up fucking. I honestly don't know if she's attracted to me in some way, but she does tell me her parents want to meet me quite often, and she tells me they think we are together. Or at least fucking.", "summary": "girl and i slept in same bed, nothing happened because we were extremely tired, but she could have said no. what does it mean?"}
{"id": "t3_3dv2yd", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "How to handle late mother's (hopefully) continuing stream of income from book publishing", "post": "For some background, my mother passed away in 2011. She was self employed, was a trained graphic designer and fanned out into designing books. She did book design for actual clients and then found a way to self publish books in the public domain through booksurge/createspace on Amazon. She got a decent volume of books out there in paperback for a decent price and maybe pulled in a couple hundred bucks per year for a short amount of effort. \n\nObviously when she died her business died with her except that her books are still available on Amazon and so I would imagine that income is being generated but no checks seem to come to her at her former address. Candidly when she died it wasn't on the top of my to-do list to track this down. \n\nBut now that some time has passed I stumbled on some papers in cleaning out some of my stuff and it reminded me. \n\nJust wondering if anyone has any thoughts on best ways to proceed. For more detail.. We (my father and I) handled her estate through probate without a will. Long story there but she did have a will but the names executor had since become someone with whom the family never spoke. Not sure it's useful to the story but just thinking that if I call up createspace and say \"hey I'm bir5150 and my mother left this publishing stuff behind\" they may ask for some court documentation on her estate.", "summary": "Late mother published/sold books through createspace, they are still being sold, want to get access to the income stream."}
{"id": "t3_10z618", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[22F] My insecurities and emotions are ruining my relationship so I asked for a break and bf [22M] says he has trust issues now cause he thinks I'm gonna f*** around", "post": "I've had trust/insecurity/emotional issues in past relationships and now I'm getting them again with my current boyfriend (we've been together for about 6 months now).  I can see that my insecurities stem from self esteem/worth issues...  I'm really embarrassed about this, but I'm way to dependent on my SO's.  I don't have a good number of real friends to begin with, so I become extra attached.  I don't like this so I've been trying hard since my first break-up to build my confidence and independence, and I have improved a lot, but I'm still not exactly where I need to be.  I still crave assurance and a \"need to be needed\" from my current BF.  Sometimes when I get emotional, he says things that make me feel assured, so I think it's conditioning me to be more emotional...  We've been on a roller coaster ride in the past twoish months, and I'm realizing this, and I decided to take that hard step and ask for a break so that I can try to work on myself a little more.  However, he said that he thinks I'm gonna use this time to \"f*** around\" and he's getting trust issues...\n\nI don't understand why he's saying he thinks I'm gonna f*** around...  Are we both being immature?  What's going on?  I would like a third person to give me any opinion on what's going on between us right now.  And also, how can I work on my insecurity issue without quitting on our relationship?", "summary": "Suggested to bf that we should take a break because of my insecurities, and now he's getting trust issues because he thinks I'm gonna cheat on him during the break... ???????"}
{"id": "t3_11sq5s", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do you deal with someone who constantly tries to screw up with you on Facebook?", "post": "**Long story:**\n\nA few months ago, the (ex)girlfriend of my girlfriend's close friend has issues with my girlfriend and her close friend being, well, close. Therefore, she keeps trying to shame my girlfriend on Facebook publicly (e.g. creating pages dedicated to shaming my girlfriend) under a false account. The sad thing is my girlfriend's close friend seems to be defending his girlfriend and says she won't do something like that. That's also the reason why my girlfriend has distanced herself from her close friend ever since.\n\nFast forward to now, that girl and my girlfriend's close friend apparently broke up and so the close friend is trying to make up to my girlfriend. The problem is, the girl is now back with another round of her annoyance. This time, she's now attacking both my girlfriend and me. Creating pages and false accounts just attacking us in ways she can think of. I don't know why she's doing this even though she and my girlfriend's close friend already broke up. I guess she's bitter or something?\n\nSo now my question is, how do we deal with her? It's not easy to say that we should just ignore and block her because she knows some acquaintances of ours which could sever ties with potential jobs and the likes. Creating a new Facebook account isn't a viable option since I also use my Facebook for business purposes and I have a lot of my professional contacts there. Not including the personal URL that is already well established.", "summary": "We have someone that's constantly trying to wreck us in public. How do we deal with her? Thanks in advance, good citizens of Reddit. :/"}
{"id": "t3_3yhrl0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] am unsure about getting into a new relationship [19M]", "post": "My last relationship lasted 10 months and I gave it my everything. It seemed like a perfect match until one day he gave me the \"it's not you, it's me\" (which albeit was valid, as he does suffer from severe depression). It took me a while, but I recovered. That was about 4 months ago. \n\nFlash forward to now. After that didn't work out, I started going on casual dates and meeting new people. I actually found I really enjoyed it. It gave me space to focus on schoolwork (I'm an engineering major and have 3 jobs on campus so I'm pretty busy) and an openness in my social life. A few weeks ago, I met this guy at a party, and we started flirting, nothing crazy, kissed, then I left. I thought it was a one-off thing, but we ended up going on a few dates before break and talk a lot now. \n\nHe's made it very clear that he wants a relationship. He doesn't play mind games (my ex did and I hated it) and is genuinely very sweet and we're surprisingly compatible. Honestly, I could see it working out really well. The issue is that I have found that I really enjoy the single life. After giving so much to a relationship and watching it flounder, I realized that I can be all that I need, and while this new guy is wonderful, I don't really want the commitment attached to a 'relationship'. I'm still really young and I want to enjoy college. At the same time, I don't want to miss out on a potentially really wonderful guy, nor do I want to hurt him at all. Help?", "summary": "met a wonderful guy, but I've grown accustomed to (and really enjoy) being single. At the same time, I'm having major FOMO about the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_26e9hb", "subreddit": "books", "title": "Banning books in 2014", "post": "My former high school (I have moved away and graduated from college and started m life in another state) recently made the news on my Facebook feed for banning The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison. The school board, earlier this year, approved he purchase of a classroom set, and it was on the syllabus since before school even started. The instructor gave a trigger warning and offered an alternate book (for those unaware, this book deals with incest/rape/racism). The students started the book, then a couple days in, the principal interrupted the class, snatched all the books from the students. \n\nI am against censorship. As a parent, I may not be encouraging my child to read this when she is younger, however, this is an AP English/History course of 11th graders. They are old enough to decide for themselves. A majority of these kids are college-bound, and this course is very similar to a college-level course. The instructors, one of whom I know, are very well-read and are always on hand for clarification/further understanding/questions/whatever from the students. As near-adults who have experienced 17 years of life now, a lot of the themes may be easy to relate to. Books not banned from this course/school include: Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, The Grapes of Wrath, and The Catcher in the Rye. \n\nDespite not living in my hometown any longer, I want to do something. I know someone started a petition on Change.org, but is there anything that can be done, like someone specific to contact or maybe a way to educate the public on the necessity of reading this book? My youngest sister is actually attending this school, and the students have expressed a desire to finish their book. The teachers both need help standing up for themselves as well.", "summary": "Small town high school banned a book. Students/instructors have desire to continue their lesson plan. Need outside help from people like myself. "}
{"id": "t3_4cw75z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me(M19) and Friend(F18)", "post": "Hey guys need some advice.\n\nI dont mean to come off as a douche but I recently met a girl in my college class. She is nice but I barely know her and I am not interested. For the past couple of weeks she has texted me and I have texted back. I don't know what her problem is but if I don't reply within 5 minutes she starts blowing my phone. She accuses me of trying to shut her out. Again I am friends with her but not close at all. I see her once a week in college. I told her to stop getting so worried and she was acting irrational. I told her if it bothered her that I didnt reply quickly that she should stop texting me. She is obviously interested in me but I have again told her I am not interested subliminally. I also told her maybe it is best to take a break from the relationship and she agreed. 10 minutes ago she texted me as if nothing happened. What to do? Am I being mean or?", "summary": "Girl I barely know won't stop sending me messages and getting mad over nothing. Told her I wasnt interested. Still no progress."}
{"id": "t3_lruzf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Luna Bail Bonds: A scam?", "post": "My husband found a job on craigslist for a [\"Fugitive Recovery Agent\"] for Luna Bail Bonds. He told me he went in for an interview and that they said they like him for the job, so they gave him a spot at an \"orientation/seminar\" this summer to train him. There was a $50 deposit for a seat at the orientation since, as my husband says, there are only 20 seats available, and they told him at the interview that his equipment and training class would cost $540, which he would be expected to pay before attending the seminar/orientation. My husband and I are **extremely** low on cash, so I'm tentative in telling him I truly think he should go for it, since $540 is the majority of his next paycheck and I'm not bringing in any substantial amount of money. I'm at school and only working part time, and his current job is only temporary and will only last a couple more months at the most, so finding a new job is very important.\n\nThis whole situation seems really sketchy to me, but I'm not sure if I'm just being unreasonably skeptical. My concern is that he'll pay the money, go to the seminar, and they'll tell him something along the lines of \"We'll call you when there's a position open.\" Does anyone have any more info on this company? The only stuff I can find is what the company put up themselves...", "summary": "Husband found an ad for a job for Luna Bail Bonds on craigslist. He interviewed, they said they liked him, but they're asking for $540 up front- does anyone know if this is a scam?"}
{"id": "t3_pypj8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I want to romantically apologize to my girlfriend, any ideas?", "post": "I did something that was hurtful to her and I hate myself for it.  When I apologized before for something else I felt really bad about, I spelled out 'I'm Sorry' in her backyard with candles and lit them up. \n\nI want to win her back again, and obviously I know that this isn't going to make things all better, but I want to try at least.\n\nI was thinking of getting helium balloons and writing on them, floating them up to her window and telling her i'm sorry and that we can work things out and then give her a scrapbook afterwards to show that hopefully all the great times we had/will have are worth it.  \n\nhelp anyone?", "summary": "I fucked up and I want to apologize with something showy.  I have used candles to spell out i'm sorry before, any ideas? "}
{"id": "t3_2vua4s", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "Tifu By Inhaling Shampoo", "post": "This happened to me a month or two ago. Having a nice relaxing shower after a hard day at work. Shower is going along good, lathering shampoo on my head when I decide the beard could use a lather as well. Get a nice thorough coating on the beard when I decide to take a breath, that was a terrible mistake. The shampoo foam made its way to the back of my throat and completely blocked off my airways. Im standing there completely unable to breath, trying to gasp for air when my SO hears the ordeal from the living room and rushes in to check on me. There I am choking and in full panic whilst covering my junk. Finally she calms me down to the point where I'm finally able to take light short breaths without closing off my airways completely again. I was very cautious the remainder of that shower. I will never underestimate the power of shampoo again.", "summary": "Had Shower. Choked on beard shampoo. Thought death was near. Girlfriend able to get me to breath while I was panicked and covering my junk for some reason. Finished shower."}
{"id": "t3_ud4ci", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Depression and Relationship Help", "post": "About three weeks ago, my girlfriend and I broke up. I could tell that she wasn't happy in the relationship, so I suggested that we break up , because I want her to be happy. We had an off and on relationship for about a month and a half, do I figured that we would get back together, because I was still madly in love with her. She is my world. She has a new boyfriend, and when I found out, it hit me that she had moved on. I am devestated, because I still love her, and she is completely done with me, and I can tell she really doesn't want to talk to me. I just want o know what to do. Im depressed. I don't want to do anything but lay in bed and cry. I've been crying non-stop (even at school) since 7:00 PM EST last night. Everyone of my friends that I've talked to has told me to move on, but I can't. It hurts too much. She was my first true love.", "summary": "My ex is with a new guy, and it's hit me that we ate officially through. Now I'm depressed."}
{"id": "t3_2nerhw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my Girlfriend [22 F] 2 years,I have Bi-Polar 2 and recently my moodiness and depression is getting to my girlfriend.", "post": "On our second date I told her I had Bipolar 2 and she was fine with it. She borrowed a book I had on the disorder that helped her understand. Everything has been fine, but lately I've been in a bad depression. I have lost interest in everything and I really have no desire to be intimate which  is really getting to her.  Also, im irritable on top of the depression so im constantly lashing out verbally. Im trying to see a psychologist but my insurance doesnt cover it so I have to pay a huge chunk of money every visit. I cant afford it right now. \n\nThroughout this depression Ive had moments of semi-happiness. So when I have those moments and im still not interested in anything or intimate, she takes it as im losing interest in her, Which I AM NOT. I love her dearly.\n\nI can see her slowly becoming mentally drained. I want her in my life, and ive told her that it will pass, which she knows, but her insecurities are getting the best of her. Last night, she told me she cried all the way home, and now she is afraid to come over because she doesnt want to get let down because im not being intimate with her.", "summary": "I have bipolar 2, which shes been fine with, but recently my depression is worse then usual causing my girlfriend to become insecure to the point she doesnt want to come over due to my lack of intimacy. What can I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2xuyad", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by wearing a shirt that was too tight", "post": "This happened today.. \n\nobligatory: im the shy-est kid in my grade & i have a reputation of wearing tight clothing\n\nSo here I was, at my high school weightlifting class, surrounded by a bunch of girls doing 3-pound curl and guys doing 35pound-curls.\nI'm definitely not the most athletic of all guys, and although I have some muscle, a nice layer of fat created from vanilla ice cream and candy embraces all signs of muscle. Like any other gym, there are mirrors everywhere. I walk into the room confidently, chin up, staring down the girls lifting 3 pounds and being stared down by the guys lifting 35. I pick up some weights and turn to look at myself in the mirror.\nAnd there I saw it.\nI was wearing the tightest, most ridiculous looking t-shirt. My nipples were perfectly depicted, and all the fat around them just as well. \n[I looked like this](\n\nEveryone is staring at me. I do my thing, and everyone just keeps staring. At the end of the class, all the kids in the class made a remark on it. (Which is absolutely horrifying as a shy kid). \n**ON TOP OF THAT** my teacher told me that he'd drop my grade to a B if I didn't stop wearing these types of shirts.", "summary": "I wore a super tight shirt to PE showing fat and nipples and got told by the teacher to never wear it again, or he'd lower my grade"}
{"id": "t3_4jlfd9", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Should I [23 m] break up with my gf [24 f]?", "post": "I have been dating my gf for just over 3 years and we currently live together. Over the last few weeks we have been having discussions about breaking up. Neither of us have done anything extensive like cheating or anything, but things just haven't been clicking lately. \n\nOver the last few months we fight almost every week about small things. Most fights consist of me not paying her enough attention in her mind and me getting frustrated that she's mad at me over small things like not texting her updates when I'm out with my friends after she falls asleep. \n\nI also have not really had the desire to have sex with her any more. Often feeling obligated to do so. Something we used to do almost every day but recently we do it maybe once a week. \n\nI have been told that I am more fun when I am without her, and I feel like i have more fun without her. But I really do care for her and love her. And our talks have been civil and logical about breaking up but we are both afraid to both break up and regret it later or both be in a relationship that isn't working for either of us. \n\nAre these normal problems in a relationship this long or are these really red flags. If it is normal, what advice do you have to make it better?", "summary": "me and my gf are not clicking. Is it time for us to move on, or are there changes we can make to be better."}
{"id": "t3_1i7sh4", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "My kitten's tail was brutally broken and I need some moral support, Reddit.", "post": "So, here's some backstory...\n\nMy boyfriend and I just moved in together less than a month ago and one of our first priorities was to adopt a kitten from his dad. We hand raised this kitten from birth and she is the sweetest, most precious girl ever.\n\nWell, this morning at about 1am, I sat in our recliner. Now, I always check underneath before I sit down because she likes to nap under there. I didn't see her, but when I sat down and lifted the foot rest, I heard a horrible scream and she ran out from underneath. She had been INside the recliner and I didn't know. After getting her to come to me and stop crying, I got a better look and the bone was protruding from her tail (about an inch away from the base) and she was bleeding all over me. Naturally, my boyfriend is out of the country for two weeks and I cannot get in touch with him (or anyone) at 1am.\n\nAfter much hysteria, I finally got in touch with my SO's father and we got my little Kiwi to the emergency vet and only left at about 6am. The vet informed us that the only thing to do was to amputate her tail so she's only going to have a little stump. The main problem? This bill is $2500 and my boyfriend and I are backed up on bills from the move. We have the money to pay it, and luckily his father paid it for us and we can just pay him back over time, but still...", "summary": "My kitten's tail bone broke, was protruding from her skin, I feel like a terrible owner, and the bill is $2500. Anyone have some financial advice, moral support, or a similar story?"}
{"id": "t3_ft1sv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How would a neophyte go about becoming a real estate broker in California?", "post": "I've been surfing the internet in search of a reliable guide of sorts...and I must say, either my GoogleFu is rather weak or there is a real dearth of information regarding the process of entering real estate in the Golden State.\n\nCan anyone give me a short explanation of possible classes to take, etc. in Southern California (preferably the O.C.)? \n\nI don't want to take online classes. I want to take something approved by the state and that will expedite the passing of the licensure exams. I realize that there is a difference between agent and broker, and I am trying to become a broker. I have a BA in Philosophy and I'm not sure if that helps me or not. \n\nIn addition, I want to go to a school that will provide me with connections, etc. in my attempt at making it in real estate.\n\nThe minute I gave up on my internet search I was like \"Hm...time for r/RealEstate (if it exists)\" and lo and behold...it did. However, r/RealEstate is too small my desires. Hence why I came here. This is a cross-post.", "summary": "I'm a recent college grad living at home and would like to get into commercial real estate brokering in Orange County."}
{"id": "t3_3ba4i9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by wearing my underwear", "post": "So I work as a swim teacher, and this morning I had an early shift. I also worked yesterday so I had to hang my swim clothes to dry. I wake up, go outside, pick up all my swim clothes, go back inside, I take off my pants and undies and proceed to put on my work shorts when I feel a strange sensation on my left butt cheek. I'm really confused as to what it was because it hurt way too much for a thorn that might have gotten stuck in my clothes. At this point the pain gets stronger and stronger and I'm like what did I just do to warrant this pain?? I pull back my shorts a little and I see this little fuzz-WHAT THE FUCK THERE'S A BEE IN MY SHORTS. Fast forward a few hours after I've finished work: I got stung twice, and I still didn't kill that bugger although I don't know whether it was a yellow jacket or a honey bee so it could be dead already. Thankfully I wasn't allergic to bee stings because 15 minutes after that I was in the pool...longest 5 hours of my life. I suppose my consolation is that I wore my shorts right way around or I'd be in the hospital I imagine.", "summary": "I put on my swim shorts without looking inside and I got stung by a bee..on my ass...twice. Check your clothes guys."}
{"id": "t3_4lxskt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 F] with my mom [59F] told her truth about her family and now she won't talk to me.", "post": "My little sister was in India with my mom's insane family (we are from Canada).\n\nShe messaged me about it a few days back detailing how my uncle hits his wife, my aunt is in a cult and my grandma is a psychopath who manipulates and sets people against each other.\n\nOnce I found out, I told my dad. He basically said that my sister was a strong person and that she would be okay.\nLast night my mom (who I don't have a great relationship with) and I had a fight and I feel very guilty because I told her what was happening with her family.\n\nShe obviously didn't believe me and accused me of being a hateful person.\n\nThis morning my dad also asked me if I had thought about the consequences of my actions.\n\nI feel like I've betrayed my sister's trust and hurt my mother.\n\nI know that I just told the truth and that abuse is often hidden in Indian culture but it just hurts and I feel like the only reason I told my mom was to hurt her. (I've actually been very worried about my sister but still)\n\nShe isn't with them anymore and has left to stay with other family members so really, I didn't have to tell my mom.\n\nThey all act very different when she's around and they've never been anything but kind to me. They did say rude things to my sister but she just pretended she was jet lagged and didn't understand them.\n\nAnyway its been bothering me all day. I do have depression and spent all day in bed just sitting in my guilt and my mom wouldn't even look at me when she got home.\n\nI don't know what to do or how to fix this.", "summary": "I told my mom that her family was actually super messed up and now she is very upset and hurt. I have guilt over this and what should I do next?"}
{"id": "t3_37kp7h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [16 F] want my first real relationship.", "post": "I am a gamer who always met guys on the internet. Within the past few years, I've been in a two serious long distance relationships that haven't worked out. Each one lasting a year. We would bond over our love of gaming and Skype/text everyday. The first one was 2012-2013 and the second one was 2013-2014.\n\nI have been doing online school for two years; I used to go to a public highschool and I'm very shy. I don't talk a lot, I pretty much have social anxiety and it's hard for me to go up to people that I don't know.\n\nI don't like the feeling of when someone says hey, I can't say it back, or I do and I get so anxious because I can't carry a conversation. I want to be able to feel confident to make friends, especially ones in my repeated grade (supposed to be a senior, but I'm still a junior.)\n\nI feel like my social skills are the one thing that keeps me away from happiness most of the time, and well, I think it would be nice to legitly have a boyfriend for once. I haven't even experienced anything, and I feel partly like I'm missing out.\n\nI go back to my public school in September. Do you have any tips to overcome shyness? And I guess, how did you meet your girlfriend/boyfriend in school? Thank you in advance.", "summary": "Shy girl always online dated through video games. No social skills but feels ready to date. How do I overcome anxiety?"}
{"id": "t3_413c6t", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17F] feel like I'm becoming a jealous girlfriend in my 3.5 year relationship with my boyfriend [19M]", "post": "EDIT: I'm on phone so I don't know how to flair \n\nSo this is a little bit of a strange question/advice and it's more about how I can change myself. \n\nMy boyfriend and I are neither very social people. We have a few close friends each, but we're not party people and spend a lot of time with each other, especially since we've both recently been on summer break (Australia). \nTonight he went out to a bar event with a few of his close friends and since I'm under 18, I couldn't go. \n\nWe hung out before he went there and as soon as I got home after dropping him off I started feeling pretty sad, and kind of jealous (worth mentioning I do have moderate clinical depression). I'm not worried about him doing things with other people, but I just feel jealous that he's not spending time with me. \n\nIt's completely irrational and I can separate myself from it, but I can't help feeling that way and it's infuriating. I've noticed it before when he mentions making friends or times when a girl has given him her number and we've joked about it - I get a little jealous. \n\nI need to learn how to spend more time by myself and not be jealous if he has other friends but I just don't know how. It's also a complete double standard because I tell him all the time how much fun I have making friends in lines at shopping centres and joke about guys who try and hit on me.", "summary": "I feel like I'm slowly becoming a jealous girlfriend, and I can see it happening but I don't know how to stop it"}
{"id": "t3_3kmwrm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I [21M] tell if I'm ever going to get over an ex?", "post": "Hi, I'll keep this short because if I don't it will be a book. I ended a relationship with a girl who I loved very much. I was very confused - didn't know if I really loved her and felt that I would regret not dating around in college. \n\n-------------------------\n\nThe following year was very difficult for me for numerous reasons, but I never got over my ex. I've been dealing with depression - been seeing a therapist and taking antidepressants. So i've been working on myself a lot. \n\n-------\nThis is my last year at Uni and I'm finally starting to make some progress with other women, but every day my heart still aches for my ex. \n\n------\nThe thing is, I'm ususally pretty good at knowing if how I feel is temporary or whatever, I feel like I'm good at gauging the severity of my emotions. I've been working very hard to get over and to stop loving my ex but I have this gut feeling and deep fear that I never will. I'm afraid that I'm going to live my life and regret not trying to get back with her - but I know i'm not ready to try that. \n\n-------\nfinally, I keep expecting to see her around campus. Every girl who even slightly resembles her I see her face and my heart flutters like \"oh shit there she is\". I'm constantly feeling nervous. I also wish for nothing more than for her to contact me. I made a decision that if I'm going to talk to her again it would have to be her that contacts me - I'd just feel too weak and immasculated if I did again.\n\n------\n\nWhat can I do here? I'm just so sad and anxious. Thanks.", "summary": "I'm still hurting about an ex from a year ago. How can I tell if this pain is going to stop or not?"}
{"id": "t3_1vo53y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [30/F] feeling very troubled by my lack of desire to marry my boyfriend [30/M] of about 5 years; i fantasize about other men. is there something i can do about this? should i tell my boyfriend?", "post": "my boyfriend and i have been talking about marriage. i want to have a kid, a family, a partner in life. i think he'd make a great father and husband. objectively i know he's a very good looking fellow who loves me very much. he's not perfect but he's really really great. i've always thought of him as a treasure. \n\nso i'm not sure what my problem is and why, when i think of marrying him, i feel a bit nauseous and scared.\n\nis marriage just not for me?\n\nshould i tell him how i've been feeling? \n\nif i can just resolve these issues without him being troubled i'd like to spare him the suffering.\n\ni'd really appreciate any thoughts.", "summary": "think my boyfriend is AWESOME but am not excited about the idea of marrying him - is there something wrong with me?"}
{"id": "t3_3m8dkg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[20/M] I can't seem to be able to be the right kind of guy for my girlfriend [21F], anyone have any advice?", "post": "So I find myself being unable to be the right kind of guy for my girlfriend. And it isn't so much that she's trying to change me into something I'm not. I seem to be unable to follow through with a lot of simple rules that we both think should be common knowledge. I've had this relationship for two years and I still find myself messing up things a decent boyfriend should do. Before I met her I was in a lot of unhealthy relationships where I never really felt like I was in a relationship. And now two years later it still seems like I can't figure things out. I continuously make the same mistakes over and over to the point where I'm now just saying \"Sorry\" and \"I won't let it happen again!\" every time something happens, and it's driving both of us up a wall. She gets frustrated that I can't realize that I need to change things and I can't figure out how to stop being such an idiot. It's come to the point where I feel stupid being unable to get it right for the both of us and the sake of our relationship.", "summary": "I keep repeating the same mistakes, making empty promises and being unable to get into the right flow of being a good boyfriend even after two years and it's really hurting my relationship."}
{"id": "t3_3d7cas", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (28M) constantly date women who are bad for me and am unable to have a relationship with a normal girl.", "post": "I always date crazy girls, the bad ones, hot but nutty, some friends are like I wish I could date that girl right up until she snaps and they see that and are like wow, glad it wasn't me.\n\nIt's a running joke among my friends at this point, nearly every girl I've met has some kind of disorder, they're clingy or bipolar or just aggressive, they're all kinky, almost every girl I've dated we've done some form of hardcore role play/bdsm. Nearly every time we act out these fucked up destructive scenarios that even some of bdsm folk I know were like that's intense.\n\nIt's just crazy, it's like a damn drug to me, I meet these really nice normal chicks occasionally and it's just like why can't I be attracted to you, why can't I like you. Sometimes I feel like I'm cursed to just date the girls who are bad for me, it's an addiction and I dunno what to do. \n\nIf there's something messed up with a girl and she's moderately attractive but there's a normal but extremely hot girl I always go for the nutty one and I do mean nutty. \n\nI dunno if I'm posting this in the right place, guess I just need someone or some people to give me some advice here, I'm gonna be heading into my thirties in a couple years and I want to be able to settle down, I don't want the girl whose a fucking tornado as the one I spend my life with, sure it's fun, but I've been there and been through so much with several of these girls and it's wearing me down as a person. \n\nAt 28 I feel emotionally/mentally exhausted.", "summary": "have been dating hot, crazy women since I was 17, have not a single clue how to have a normal relationship, dunno if I'll ever have a normal girlfriend/wife or something and it terrifies me"}
{"id": "t3_vhzt9", "subreddit": "running", "title": "I have a running related problem, looking for some insight", "post": "Hey r/running, I have a running (and potentially health related?) issue, and I figured the hive mind would be the quickest place to get an answer. First off, I am a 6'2\", 190lb (1.85m, 85kg) varsity level rower at one of the better American universities, so I am pretty fit overall (train 6/7 days a week, etc.). However, when I have gone running outside for the past several times, I have had a very strange thing happen. About 40 minutes in, I get lightheaded and basically lose the ability to run (or even really walk) in a straight line. It feels almost as if I were drunk. I went running this morning, and the same thing happened. I made it home before collapsing over the toilet and throwing up. I didn't eat anything before I ran, but I had some water and Gatorade, and I don't usually eat before working out in the morning. Also, this only happens when running outside. It never happens when: rowing on the water, rowing on the rowing machine, spinning indoors, cycling outdoors (thankfully) or even running on the treadmill (although I only ever run on the treadmill in the afternoon). Has this happened to anyone else, or are there any possible fixes anyone can think of?", "summary": "Generally very fit guy getting lightheaded and dizzy and nauseous after running for 40 minutes, wants to know what is causing it."}
{"id": "t3_41d982", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "The binge-monster digs in its claws and devours my purpose. Please advise", "post": "I have a seriously fucked up relationship with food. I feel like there's something broken inside, like this parasite has got its grip and compels me to feed it. \n\nI have stocked my house for success. No junk. No temptation. But I literally just drove to the 24 hr servo and bought $25 worth of cake and donuts to make this craving stop. \n\nWhen I'm craving something it's like the craving starts screaming inside of my head demanding attention until it finally drowns out all other thoughts halting all productivity until I satisy the craving. It feels like a compulsion. Like an addict looking for the next hit. I HATE IT. \n\nI hate feeling so out of control of my own body. I hate the diet, exercise, success, craving, binge, failure cycle. \n\nI know the key to moving forward is to forgive myself and carry-on towards my goal as if nothing happened rather than further sabotaging by dwelling and caring overt into tomorrow. But I don't know how. I don't want to spiral.\n\n Any and all advice is welcome. thoughts. commiseration. Does it ever get easier? I'm staring down 64 kg/140 lbs to lose.", "summary": "will try reading books and eating more of the good stuff since I dont tend to crave a binge if I'm already very full."}
{"id": "t3_18t4wy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23] and she [22] beed dating for a month, and asked her to be my GF, she accepted but now she needs time for herself.", "post": "Here's my situation.\n\nOne day this girl added me on Facebook out of nowhere, we started talking, and it turned out she was a mutual friend of some of my friends and she served me one day at the coffee shop she works at.\n\nFastfoward, she invited to grab a bite a with her, that was our first date, and we started dating two more times until I asked her to be my girlfriend last week, and she said yes, at this point we had kissed, hugged and exchanged a few \"I love you\".\n\nNow, one week later she told me that she needs time to herself, but that she swears she loves me and want to be with me and we can still be dating, but she needs time because things advanced too soon between us.\n\nOne thing I forgot to mention about us, is that we just got out of abusive relationships recently, mine was a 4 years relationship and hers was a 6 months relationship.\n\nAnd I think my problem stems from a similar situation that happened to me before with my EX; I waited all time for her to recover from her previous relationship, but in the meantime I was the rebound and she was dating different guys until she found the one and then proceeded to dump me, and for this reason, I have this weird feeling that if I keep around this new girl until she recovers, is going to happen the same thing.\n\nBut I'm still taking her feelings as true, but I'm still confused of what to do, any advice guys?", "summary": "Girl I've been dating and was my \"girlfriend\" for a week asked me for time, but she swears she loves me and wants to be with me."}
{"id": "t3_1xah4y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (25/M) wife (27/F) doesn't believe my cerebral palsy effects me as much as it does.", "post": "My wife and I have been together 5 years, married 2. I have Cerebral Palsy It's basically a (non-genetic) neurological \"disease\" as a result of a stroke I had while I was being born. My muscles on one side are much weaker than the others. However, mine is very minor. Nobody can tell unless I tell them.\n\nMy coordination is bad. My brain doesn't recognize where the left side of my body is in relation to anything else. Sometimes this causes me to knock things over, or bump into things. My wife gets irritated and calls me clumsy. \n\nWhen I was unemployed, a warehouse offered me a job. It was pretty much lifting heavy things and moving them. I didn't think I could do that, but I wanted to be employed so I tried. After a couple hours my arm muscles just seized up on me, and they just wouldn't work anymore. So afterwords I told my wife that I physically couldn't do it, and she got mad at me. She told me that I must not be \"trying hard enough\" or something like that. Every time I remind her of my disability she completely dismisses it, sometimes saying \"theres people a lot worse off than you\". I understand that, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't effect me. \n\nHow can I make my wife understand how much this effects my life, and the fact that there are limitations to what I can do?", "summary": "I have cerebral palsy, wife just dismisses it as me being \"clumsy\" or \"not trying hard enough\"."}
{"id": "t3_1plp2f", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "boyfriend left e-journal open and I happened upon it...the entry was about me and it was devastating to read...what do I do?", "post": "I've been dating a guy who is really health conscious. I was never a dieting type until I started dating him, and now all I do is obsess over my appearance and worry about looking fat..he can be unintentionally critical about it. He used to be with someone with an eating disorder, so I think that has a a lot to do with it. The entry was open when I went to use his laptop and caught my eye. It said \"I haven't had sex with her for months. She put on about 15 pounds and I lost interest.... Plus, given that my ex was anorexic, that's a tough act to follow.\"  and describes how he's lost attraction to me then he sarcastically said \"oh well, we'll probably get married soon so she'll realize she's never going to be single again and start working out more and stop eating like shit. yeah, it'll get right back on track.\" The thing is, I'm 5' 8\" and 130 pounds; I wear a size 2. I'm not fat at all, and I don't know if this is something worth throwing away a relationship over or what to even say for him to understand how humiliating that was to read. I've only gained I think 5 pounds since we began dating years ago.", "summary": "I read my boyfriend's ejournal about how he thinks I gained weight and am not attractive anymore and I don't know how to handle it."}
{"id": "t3_3wqk47", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU", "post": "Obligatory this didn't happen today. This happened about a year and a half ago.\n\nMy girlfriend and I wanted to get it on, but we were at her parent's place so we decided to get in the car and find a secluded spot to do the \ndirty. She told me about this deserted road with no lights and suggested we head over there, pull over, and do the deed. Mistake number one.  \n\nShe drives deep into the road and finds a nice area where we wouldn't be noticed.  We start going at it and everything is good.  However, it started hearing up (both ways) so I quickly turned on the AC and then go back to finish what we started. Mistake number two. \n\nWe went for a long time, it was great. After about an hour we were finished and satisfied. She gets in the driver seat and turns on the car. It doesn't start. We try again... Nothing. She starts to panic. Now I jump in the drivers seat and try, still nothing.  At this point she's about to cry because her parents specifically said never to go down this road at night.  This is when I realize the battery is dead. \n\nNow remember this is a completely deserted, lightless, secluded road. Girlfriend is losing her shit. I don't know anyone in this area. So here I am trying to figure this out while trying to keep Girlfriend from having a mental breakdown. I finally convince her to start calling people she knows.  \n\nEveryone is busy.\n\nShe starts to lose it again. She doesn't want to call her parents and tell them we were exactly where they said never to go. Then she remembers an old friend that lives nearby who also happens to have jumper cables. She hasn't talked to him in two years.  He answers and says \"who is this?\" We are off to a good start. She explains the situation to him saying we were watching stars and the car died. Very romantic. He is with his girlfriend but makes the special trip over and jumps her car. \n\nTo this day her parents have no idea.", "summary": "wanted to have sex, couldn't go home, decide to go down deserted road we weren't supposed to go down, car died because I got hot."}
{"id": "t3_2eg0nr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24F] realized I'm in love with my [24M] best friend at the worst possible moment", "post": "My boyfriend (M25, together 5 years) and I have had a mutual best friend, let's call him Sam, for 3 years \u2014 I'm probably a little bit closer with Sam. I've always felt that there has been a certain unspoken \"extra\" something between us, and a good amount of sexual tension, but wrote it off because I often feel that way with male friends and know it doesn't mean anything. \n\nIn one week, I'm moving across the country with my boyfriend (he's already in our new city and has been for a few weeks). This imminent departure has forced me to realize what I've tried to deny \u2014 I'm in love with Sam in a big way. The thought of leaving him is excruciating. There's nothing on Earth that makes me happier than spending time with him, he makes me happy to be alive, he makes me love myself when I normally am full of self-loathing, I care about and admire him more than I can possibly explain. I love my boyfriend too, I really do, but it's nothing compared to this. \n\nSo, I'm thinking of telling him, simply because I feel like I can't keep it in any longer. I don't know if he feels the same way, he has a lot of close female friends, so it's hard to know if his behavior towards me is different. I know it's a dangerous decision and the worst possible timing. \n\nRelevant: This cross-country move is a big deal for me regardless so I've gone into it with the idea that I'm trying it for a year and if I don't like it, I can move back (still have a lot of connections here so it wouldn't be hard). I will also be back for work every other month.", "summary": "In love with my best friend, who is also my boyfriend's close friend. About to move far away with BF. Dying to tell him, even for the chance to kiss him just one time. Should I?"}
{"id": "t3_3oszla", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to be polite and keep eye contact", "post": "Long time lurker, made an account to tell this and hopefully stop stressing so much. So I'm a junior in High school, and a clumsy one at that. Yesterday during marching drill before actual practice began, me and some friends were all sitting outside in the small parking lot we have for band and sports personnel. The lot had been empty up until a few minutes before \"the event\" happened. I never noticed a car had come in, and was talking with a friend. Keeping eye contact and walking backwards at a moderate pace as she followed. Last second she yells \"PintoBean, STOP!\" and I quickly stop, stumble over my foot and fall straight back... into a car. I somehow made a 2 1/2ft wide 1ft tall 1/2in thick dent in the back door of this car (I'm about 5' 10\" and 145lbs). I limp my way inside to get the owner of the car, and he seems fine with it and just wants me to cover insurance/ damages if needed, perfect, no issues, just a small mishap. This was reported to the office as an incident and I'm called in the next morning (day I'm posting) and he's in there, they contact my parents, clear things up, and I give the car owner my parents info to talk about insurance and what to do, the school at this point was just a medium for us to work this out through. So later that day I'm called into the office for the school police officer along with the friend I was talking to. We walk in with the principle I talked with in the morning. We are seated, the officer explains everything, tells us to be calm and we can work this out, average stuff. About near the end of him clearing things up, he breaks part of the news (couldn't tell us everything without the presence of a parent/ guardian) that the owners mom is choosing to go through Juvenile Services and charge me as a criminal instead of just working out insurance. I await tomorrow in which everything will be worked out and my future behold. I'll update if you guys want or not", "summary": "I walked backwards into a car on accident, dented the shit outta it, thought I worked out a solution with the owner but now his mom is possibly pressing charges"}
{"id": "t3_2orynf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Lost in Love?", "post": "I (22f) am in love with my ex(30m). We were together for a year but broke up a few times at his choosing over him not knowing what he wants. He keeps saying he wants to focus on career and himself and that we're at different points in life. We have been separated for about 3weeks now, but have hung out numerous time and I ended up staying the night and being cute etc. He told me that I am perfect and did absolutely everything right, and that he thinks there is something off with him because he was unable to fully \"click\" with me. When we are together we are both laughing and having fun and confiding in one another, and we're both super compatible in bed, and it just seems so perfect. But the next day it's like a switch flips and he'll start ignoring me and being short...I just don't know what to do or think. I am seriously in love with this guy, and would do anything for him, and it hurts knowing that he's looking for something else, however I want to be his friend because he became my best friend. The only person I can tell anything to and know he won't judge me. I'll tell him I want to go to dinner as friends, but then he'll kiss me and it will escalate and he'll act like we're together. And the next day, or a few days later...bam! Back to pretending I don't exist. What do I do? :/", "summary": "I'm still in love with my ex and continue to see him rather often, but he closes up when were not together and I dont know what to think or do but feel hurt."}
{"id": "t3_4cnx6p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [23 F] of ~1 year needs to have a sexually open relationship and I [21 M] don't know how to handle it", "post": "My girlfriend I and Have been together since may of last year, and everything is going swimmingly, and at the beginning of our relationship (probably about 3 months in) she brings up that at some point we should have sex with other people. Didn't really think to much of it and said that we could talk about it when the time came. In my head I was thinking DOWN the road like 2-3 years in. \n\nFast forward to saturday night when we are hanging out in her room and she brings it up again, only this time she says that it needs to happen soon. She explained that she LOVES sex and she is in love with me (the feelings are mutual) but that I cannot fully satisfy her sexually and she sometimes needs to go out and have sex with another guy/girl. She also explained that the way she views sex is that it is purely physical and that no physical attraction would get in the way of our relationship.\n\nI am honestly torn up about this... The idea of going out and being able to sleep with other people honestly is appealing, but at the same time I have never ever been in love and I feel like my heart can be broken easily as well as my ego getting in the way. I really want to be okay with this but I am having trouble with the whole idea. What do I do?", "summary": "My girlfriend needs to have a sexually open relationship and I don't know how to emotionally be okay with/ handle it. Halp plz."}
{"id": "t3_4k4m2m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (20F), asked to start job during planned trip with boyfriend (20M)", "post": "Hi Reddit!\n\nI'm in a whole jar of pickles right now.\n\nI'm currently a student in the last leg of my program before I start an internship. Last month I lost my job, and lost a lot of income because of it (I was making close to $1200/month), and have been looking. I just got a job today after over a month of looking! But here's the problem:\n\nThey want me to start this weekend so I can be alone starting next week. My school runs from about 1-5, but they want me to work from 4-8. I didn't think this was a problem until my mom pointed out that it will take me an hour to get there, and therefore will only have 2 hours of class time.\n\nBut the biggest issue for me right now is that my boyfriend and I planned to take a trip up to his cottage this weekend since it's Victoria day on Monday and they told me I will be starting the job next week. We have been planning this for about 2 months, and when I got the confirmation that I had the job, they wanted me to start this weekend. I told them that I had planned this trip with my boyfriend and they pretty much said, \"Uh sorry, we need you to start this weekend because we have to train you to be alone next week.\"\n\nI didn't know what to say so I confirmed that it was okay (my mistake!) and immediately called my boyfriend. He was mad, and I got frustrated because I was just looking for advice or something but I didn't get much. So I called my mom after and she told me to just think it over. I also apologized to my boyfriend for getting frustrated at him but it seems like he really does not want to hear it.\n\nI have no idea what to do. I have never had this problem before. I'm really strapped for cash, too, since I'm trying to owe the bank and government as little as possible. I have considered of going back to a job I had a year ago but that job just gives me anxiety and makes me feel awful, plus my grades suffered. I have also considered a line of credit, but I will have to talk to my parents about that first.", "summary": "Got new job, want to start during long weekend when a trip was planned and was told I would start next week. What should I tell my new employers?"}
{"id": "t3_3c2hsv", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Getting over my high school crush", "post": "Hello, I recently graduated high school. All throughout high school I on and off had a crush on this one girl. For the last 4 years I pretty much had feelings for this girl. I mean I had a long relationship with one person(1.5 years) and crushes on other girls. But this girl, I couldn't shake her off. This school year, we got closer but the thing is with this girl, she's awful at making plans and going through with them, and awful at talking to someone for a day or so and then not being heard from for a couple weeks. It's an actual thing and even an ongoing joke with my friends. But yeah, we got closer this year and it got to the point where it seriously felt as if we were close to a relationship (and I promise it was more than just in my head). I haven't talked to her since a week after graduation. (so like a month) It sucks because that day she kept saying how much we have to hang out. We're going to different colleges with little room to meet up due to distance. \nBut this is what I need advice on. I want to get over her. But in two weeks she has this big dance event for her, she's a dancer and it's her last show. And she invited me. But she also invited a fair amount of our friends. Should I go? I know it sounds like a simple situation, I just want to know what someone else would do in my position. Thank you reddit!!!", "summary": "high school Boy likes high school girl, girl lets boy down, girl invites boy to her big final dance show, boy doesn't know if he should go."}
{"id": "t3_3nplts", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Did I [19m] break up with my girlfriend [20f] for the wrong reasons?", "post": "Hi there,\nSo yesterday I ended things with a wonderful girl who I'd been dating for a year. For the past couple months little things kept ticking me off, like how she would be afraid to make decisions because she was worried I would be disappointed with her choice. Or how I felt like I was doing a disproportionate amount of the work during sex for less enjoyment. She is a very sensitive person and so when I would try to talk to her about these things it would usually end in tears and I would struggle to get my point across. I decided to end it when I thought about whether this was someone I could see myself with 5 or 10 years down the road and the answer was no. Of course, there were so many wonderful things that we had together, and I can't stop thinking about what I'm giving up. She loved me entirely for who I am and I couldn't give that back to her. Do you think we had a chance? Was it possible for her to change? Or was is best just to end it before things got more serious? \nThanks for your time\n\n#", "summary": "I broke up with my girlfriend because I couldn't see us together in 10 years. Did I make the wrong choice?"}
{"id": "t3_2cq03f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've [25/M] never been in a relationship beyond friendship. Not sure how to progress.", "post": "Hi /r/Relationships,\n\nI'm a 25 year old male and I've never been in a relationship and I'm starting to wonder if I ever will. \n\nI have a decent job, a car, a home. I'm successful in every part of my life apart from the part that seem to matter the most to other people. I've never been in love and I've never been in a relationship with a woman. \n\nIt's getting harder and harder as time goes on too. When I was 23 I went on a date and it ended up with the girl in my bed, but I chickened out and just went to sleep. It's stupid to be a virgin at 22, and I didn't want to look stupid nor admit that fact. Now I'm 25 and I just feel even more ridiculous. I mean, the pool of people who haven't done any of this kind of stuff by my age must be pretty damn small. Most people won't encounter them. \n\nSometimes I think about trying online dating, but in the end I'm going to come up against that exact same wall that I did 2 years ago.\n\nThen there's part of me that wonders if I can be bothered with it all. I look around at all my friends and there seems to be a huge amount of interdependence and compromise in relationships. I've always been really independent and liked my own space, so I'm not sure how well I'd even function in a relationship. \n\nMy family all seem to be convinced I'm gay, which is frustrating. My reluctance to talk about it with them is basically proof. I don't even know what's worse at this point.. Coming out as gay would probably be easier and more normal at this point. \n\nI feel like I'm missing a huge part of the life experience and that I'm emotionally stunted compared to my peers. It's not like I'm even an introvert, I'm very extroverted according to all my friends. \n\nSo yeah, I don't know what to do. Has anyone been in a similar situation of felt the same way? How did you get over it? Did you get over it? \n\nThanks in advance.", "summary": "I've never been in a romantic relationship and I'm not sure how I'm supposed to now I feel it's too late.."}
{"id": "t3_2coxcy", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "How do I get out of this vicious cycle?", "post": "I am 30 years old and I reside in Pennsylvania. I was never all that responsible with my credit, I admit to it. I was a dumb kid and it's hurting me as an adult. At one point I was almost debt free, and then I got sick. I've been dealing with a chronic medical condition for about 3 years and it's not only sucking the life out of me, but it's really putting me in a bad financial situation. It all goes back to those damn credit cards. I got to a point where all of my money was going to medical bills just to keep me out of collections that I was putting all of my everyday expenses on credit cards (mostly food and gas.) I'm now to the point where my cards are maxed out, my medical bills continue to pile up (I'm still sick and still receiving treatment ), and if those things weren't bad enough, I also have student loans. Added up I'm about 48,000 in debt. I have to say it's horrifying to type that out. I'm so embarrassed and ashamed that it's gotten to this point. As of right now my credit hasn't been completely ruined, but I don't know how much longer I can keep this up. To make things even worse, my doctor is getting me into a treatment program in another state for the illness I have, I don't know how long the treatment will be, but there's a possibility that I'll be on short term disability for a month or two, which means I'll only be getting about 2/3rds of my pay. Does anyone have any advice or am I to the point where bankruptcy is my only option? Thank you in advance.", "summary": "I'm 30, 48,000 in debt, I have a chronic illness, I'm ashamed, and I don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_4r1ahz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Dad (M 54) might be cheating on Mom ( F 52) during business trips", "post": "They have been married for around 20 years.\n\nSince around 15 years ago, my dad has frequently been going on business trips. Frequently as in he's gone almost half the time.\n\nTwo years ago, my sister and I found email evidence from around four years before that that my dad was trying to get into a romantic relationship with a women in the country he travels to. We ended up showing our mom some of the emails. We subtly confronted our dad about it but he just blew it off and we kind of just let it slide since it was such a long time ago.\n\nRecently, after he got back from a business trip, my siblings and I found a box of condom he bought during the trip and some of them were used so we are suspecting he is still having an affair but probably with someone else.\n\nWhat should I do? I think we should confront my dad about this first before telling my mom and tell him to tell my mom. \nI'm afraid of the consequences though because realistically, we are going through college right now and we are financially dependent on our dad right now for almost everything. Shelter, food, tuition etc.\nWhat should I do? And how should I go about it?", "summary": "2 years ago, caught evidence dad cheated 6 years ago. Didn't do anything. Recently caught him with used box of condoms. What should we do?"}
{"id": "t3_kz1gv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I have iron deficient anemia, need help and/or advice", "post": "Hello World of Reddit\n\nI'm a 21 year old female diagnosed last month as iron deficient anemic: my blood tests tried to count my iron levels and they were non-existent.\n\nI was told by my doctor that I had three routes I could take:\n\n* I could have a blood transfusion in the next week to boost my iron levels;\n\n* I could do an IV drip of Ferritin 2X a week for 6 weeks; or\n\n* I do take iron supplements and see how things go\n\nWell as a full time University student and, at the time, a waitress for four days out of the week options **A** and **B** did not work for me, so I decided on taking the iron supplements. Unfortunately, my doctor likes to have his patients in and out and isn't very forthcoming with information. He basically told me to get an iron supplement from the pharmacy and come back in 6 months. -.-\n\nWell, talk about conflicting information, the pharmacist told me to take one a day and to have my doctor check my iron levels in a month... So my first month of iron supplements is up and I don't feel any freaking better. In fact I feel almost worse than I did when I went and got my blood test done initially.\n\nMy iron supplements are 325 mg ferritin with 60 mg of elemental iron.\n\nI was taking one pill once a day, but then upped it to two pills a day because I wasn't feeling any better, and the result is still the same. I have absolutely no energy to do anything and I could probably outsleep a Snorlax.\n\nCan someone give me advice or any ideas to help me get better? Even just questions and comments to talk to my doctor about, as I plan on seeing him in the next 24-48 hours.\n\nIf you've read all of this thanks a million for taking the time to help me sort out this issue!", "summary": "I'm a 21year old female anemic taking iron supplements but they are not working, any ideas, questions, or comments to take to my doctor would be very helpful"}
{"id": "t3_4jpi13", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I[26F], a person in a poly situation, navigate this ridiculous jealousy I feel over my girlfriend [29F] regularly hanging out with her recent ex?", "post": "So. Background. I'm [26F] married to a dude [26M]. Been in this second relationship with my girlfriend [29F] for 3 months. I met her days before her most recent ex dumped her. We started 'dealing', as the kids say (...do the kids still say that?) right after. So far, (supposedly) she's only been dating me, but it's an open relationship, so that door is open if she finds someone else to start things with. \n\nCrazy, emotionally abusive ex wants her back. Gf lies about staying over at her ex's house last month....where the ex makes a move and kisses her..... They hang out about once a week since. Each time they hang, the ex tries to get her back and/or asks her for sex and/or tells her she's sure that they would be back together if I wasn't in the picture. Gf insists that she just wants to be friends, is maintaining boundaries, and is just trying to help her ex through a hard time........\n\nI feel like because this is a poly thing that I'm not allowed to be jealous. But...she lied about staying over there. When we got together, I asked her repeatedly if she wanted more time to figure things out with her ex. Offered space. Offered time. Even offered for her to see both of us at the same time. She said she wanted me, only me. So. To me, this ex was the one person in the free world she said she wasn't going to date. She knows how I feel about all of this. \n\nSo, Internet, I'm turning to you since I have no unbiased perspectives in my life? Am I a dumb fuck who needs to end this? Am I supposed to get over my jealousy? If so, HOW? If I stick it out and let her figure out what she wants...how long do I wait?", "summary": "girlfriend won't stop hanging with her ex. Feel guilty for being jealous because this is an open poly thing (aka, I'm the married one)."}
{"id": "t3_nh4y2", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Girlfriend and I broke up, seeking words from people more experienced than myself", "post": "Hey RA. Please excuse the wall of text!\n\nMy girlfriend (18, freshman in college) and I (male, 19, sophomore in college) broke up tonight, and I'm looking for some words (advice is welcomed too, for sure!) from people who are more experienced than I am. We had both been in relationships prior to this one, but none had been as good. We were at schools about 2 hours apart, but we could only visit each other once every few weekends.\n\nWe had been dating for a year and a half, and it was an extremely mature relationship - there's really no other basic way to say it. We both were open, trusting, always communicating, and very happy loving each other. We didn't have fights, per say, because we ended up talking out our disagreements in a totally reasonable manner. Neither of us could have asked for a better relationship, or better best friends. Our relationship didn't put any strain on relationships with other friends, either!\n\nThis year, my girlfriend entered her freshman year of college. We decided we would stay together and remain communicative about our feelings, which we did. This thanksgiving, she initiated a discussion about how she wanted to start exploring other people at school. I totally understood, and agreed - I would also like to see who else is out there! The problem was, neither of us had a reason to leave the other. We were both very happy and we both still loved each other.\n\nSo, tonight, my girlfriend told me she wanted to break up - not because she was unhappy with our relationship, but rather because she was sad about the distance between us. She was happy every time we got together, but when one of us had to leave to go back to school, she would become sad. She also expressed that she wanted to begin exploring other people at her school. I totally understand both points.\n\nI'm looking for advice partly in that I'm seeking words of encouragement. We don't dislike each other after the breakup. Neither of us cheated, and we were both extremely happy throughout our relationship! It just really, really sucks that it's over for the forseeable future.", "summary": "Girlfriend and I extremely happy together. Breakup occurs because of \"LDR\" and the desire to explore others. We both are still very friendly... but we're sad that it's over. Words of encouragement/advice?"}
{"id": "t3_14hgn0", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I need help. I can't stop hurting myself.", "post": "Throw away for reasons.\nAlso, I apologize for how long this is; I just need to get it out.", "summary": "I'm depressed, can't stop cutting myself, feel like I'm going crazy, and I don't know how to get better."}
{"id": "t3_3waanq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [M/18] need some advice on how to read and react to different mixed signals.", "post": "Basically right now there is a person who I've known for a while and is by best friend. The problem is he [M/18] is, well, a guy. He's straight as far as I know. I am too, or i thought. I don't know. But since we have gotten close I feel he and I do things that couples would but neither have mentioned it though. \n\nWe spend everyday together and when we don't we text/Snapchat ever minute that we aren't next to each other, and he has even said that I'm his favorite to text and the majority of his texting goes to me. And times we're gone at college (different unis) we Skype every other night. We go eat at places, watch movies, and hang out just us 2 a lot. It has gotten to a point where I constantly think about him and being next to him again. He has said the same thing.\n\nOur conversations are unique too because we talk about everything, and even sometimes we get into just texting about gay things we would do but we both see it as jokes. We talk about girls we've been with, and girls we see out in public. We have been asked if we were a couple out in public before and he replied \"so what if we are.\" \n\nI don't know if anyone of you have had the potential same problem, if there is any advice, or anything at all I should do about myself or him.", "summary": "My best friend and I both straight, as far as I know, but do everything as if we're a couple."}
{"id": "t3_3slccz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21/M] want to be single right now at this point in my life and I don't know how to go about breaking up with my gf [21/F] of 2,5 years.", "post": "I've been with my girlfriend for 2,5 years, and everything has been great up until the last couple of months. I'm currently in my last year of university and I'm living with my girlfriend, but I feel like I've reached a point in my life where I'd be happier being single. There are certain ambitions I have in life that I don't believe I'll be able obtain if I stay with my girlfriend.\n\nLike I said, I'm in my last year of university and I'm looking into graduate schemes across my country (UK). I can be more ambitious with my career if I'm not tied down, and my girlfriend is set on staying in our city. I had plans to travel that I put on hold when we got together and I'm disappointed that I won't be able to fulfill them if I stay with her. I'm not as happy in the relationship as I have been before, which is not down to her, I just feel like I want to get out and live my life a bit more, instead of settling down, which I don't feel ready to do. I know she has her heart set on us marrying soon, which I definitely am not comfortable with right now. I just feel a little trapped right now.", "summary": "I'm not as happy as I once was in my relationship, and feel I would be happier going on in life if I was single."}
{"id": "t3_38bqw7", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Would you quit if you were in my position? Is it too rash to give the employer an ultimatum?", "post": "I have been a minimum wage temp for a year. I was hired as a \"consultant\" under the guise of being given an accounting job only to end up doing data entry and mail. They have changed my job 4 times. The current situation is I have the same pay but am now doing accounts payable, shipping tracking, and inventory processing. Those had previously been **three separate jobs**. I am a slavish idiot worker who showed that even during power outages I keep working. I am now completely overwhelmed and work is backing up like crazy. \n\n\u00a0\n\nIf I ask the manager will say she can't give me overtime or delegate the jobs to others. The manager is completely spineless and the other workers are relatives so they have a pact. For example, when someone's car was broken into on the facility my boss said they can check the camera, told a lame joke, chuckled and told the employee to deal with it (and slunk back to her office). The employee had to call the cop, file the report, and push through to higher up to get corporate to act on the security problem. \n\nWhen a fellow temp stole over $3600 she fired her via email and didn't have follow up investigation or punishment. That is more money than I take home in three months. \n\n\u00a0\n\nI am going to work for at least two week to be able to pay my cellphone bill and health insurance in advance if I do quit.  Should I go to my manager and ask for more money or to the temp agency? Both? Neither?", "summary": "For a year I have been a minimum wage temp who currently performs the work load previously done by three employees. Boss is too spineless to fix the problems of nepotism and likely won't remedy the low pay."}
{"id": "t3_3fxc6h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My Uncle is getting catfished by a con artist. What should I do?", "post": "I hope this is the right sub, I searched a few, and couldn't figure out the appropriate one.\n\nI am female, age 30. Uncle male, 62, paralyzed from the chest down for the last 44 years. Other individual age and gender unknown, but claims to be female and 32. \n\nI am the primary care provider for my disabled Uncle. He lives in my house. Last night, he told me that he has been in an online relationship with a woman is Ghana. She says she is in love with him, but in a bind, and needs money. He is asking me to go purchase a money order (a few hundred dollars) to send to her. Obvious scam. \n\nHe is lonely. He has been single for decades because of his disability. The woman makes him happy, even if she is just a con artist. Part of me just wants to just give in because its not worth getting in between my Uncle and his happiness even if he is getting used. If I don't do this, it will cause a big rift in my relationship with my Uncle. On the other hand, F--k that b--ch. Nobody uses my Uncle with my consent. \n\nI don't know what to do. Help? Advice? Experience?", "summary": "My Uncle is getting catfished by a con artist that is asking for money, and I am the one that has to send his cash. Do I? If I don't, how do I tell my Uncle no?"}
{"id": "t3_500zj3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (M23) got drunk and talked to my ex's (F21) best friend.", "post": "Me and my ex were together for over 2 years and broke up exactly 4 months ago today. This happened 3 days ago.\n\nBasically I went out with some friends and got completely and utterly shit-faced.\nWhile not bad in and of itself I then met my ex's best friend and got talking to her.\n\nThen she mentions that it took my ex a very long time to stop being sad about the break up and then in my drunken stupor I started laughing in her face saying that I was still hopelessly in love with my ex and that I would have probably married her eventually if we hadn't broken up. I was very drunk and know I should have just shut up but it was all word vomit.\n\nWhen I woke up the next morning I texted her to please not say anything to my ex because I don't want to put her in that kind of situation as that wouldn't be fair if she has already started to move on and I would rather she do that and be happy than get set back because I'm an idiot.\n\nShe never replied so I assume she will/already has told my ex and considering she told my best friend when he asked what we were talking about and she can't keep things to herself in general ( sounds rude and mean but I can't really think of a better way to phrase it)\n\nNow I don't know what to do. Should I contact my ex and explain myself or let it go ? either way she knows.", "summary": "Got drunk, told ex's best friend I still loved her, pretty sure she told her and now I have n clue on what to do."}
{"id": "t3_2rykko", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/F] with my boyfriend of 4 years [23/M] trouble with an ex work colleague", "post": "So we just got back from visiting our family, before which I told his old work friends from home that we were visiting and to message my BF if they wanted to see him. \n\nWe were the for 3 weeks and nothing.\n\nWe get home and his ex work colleague, a 19F is having her birthday and has invited him to a birthday dinner...after a few messages back and forth saying how she wanted to do dinner and drinks, she finally said ''You should definitely come and your gf too\". Like he could bring me if he wanted to but probably better if I didn't come.\n\nSo he actually wants to do it. He wants to take time off of work, spend probably $100 on petrol and drive for 4.5 hours to see a girl who messages him probably once every 3 months. And if I mention a bad word about her, he gets mad and defensive, I feel like I can't even voice my concerns because if I say something bad I'll be the one who's done the wrong thing.", "summary": "Ex colleague invites bf to birthday celebrations 4.5 hours away and I can't say anything about it. Am I being touchy or should I be mad?"}
{"id": "t3_1jgx9g", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I blame my best friend for me not having any other friends.", "post": "I have acquaintances, but no other *actual* friends. I have been best friends with A (I'll call her that here) for almost 10 years. I think because her parents are pretty cold to her, A feels like she needs to belittle others so she can feel better about herself. Ever since we've met she has been like this, but for some reason I'm only just recently realizing that she might be one of the greater reasons I have no real friends. (She also has no real friends... Basically all we have is each other and our boyfriends. But that's it.)\n\nMy thoughts on this are that since she is always talking shit about everyone, other people over the years must think that I am like that too. Which I will admit, after having been around A for so much of my life, some of her negative traits have rubbed off on me, like her negative views on life and pessimism in general. \n\nI don't know... I'm just very upset with my life, so things are festering.", "summary": "I blame my best and only friend for me not being able to make any other friends because of her negative and petty attitude."}
{"id": "t3_3doljo", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "[32/M] Hi... need help with an engagement idea.", "post": "I love my girlfriend been with her for 4 years and the time has finally come. \nUnfortunately I suck at planning and to be honest I see this as more of a bigger moment for her than for me so I'm not entirely too picky about how I do this. All I know is originally I wanted her friends to be around when i do this and selfishly I want to do it at the beach. The 2 things i love in this world, my girlfriend and the ocean.\n\nI'd love to have her friends there when i do it as well, but i called around to a few restaurants and to be honest I wouldn't be able to afford the expenses for a large party.\n\nCan you help me figure out how to do this?\n\nHow can I get her to the beach without being obvious? \n\nAny ideas on how I can have her group of friends be there even though I can't afford dinner reservations at any restaurants on the beach? I was hoping her friends could record it.\n\nI don't mind it being just her and I, but how what would be a reason we go to the beach since she rarely goes? At least if we were meeting her friends up for dinner that would be easier to sell.\n\nEither way the go date is 8/8 so hopefully ill come up with something instead of dropping on one knee in her living room in our pj's lol.\n\nThank you in advance. =]", "summary": "Come from broken home, love/marriage wasn't acknowledged much. Have a ring, want to purpose to my wife. I can't think of an idea to surprise her at the beach with her friends there in affordable way."}
{"id": "t3_3g3mcq", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "[California Renter] HELP! Just moved but the house is full of cockroaches. My biggest fear.", "post": "So my fiancee and I just moved into an older house in California. We relocated for a job and put down most of our savings on our deposit and first months rent (our deposit was huuuuuge). But upon moving in, we realized the house was not adequately clean or ready for move in and within a few days we realized there is bad roach infestation throughout the entire house and garage.\n\nWe have notified the landlord of the problem in writing and said we will begin by deducting extermination traps from further rent if it not dealt with immediately and go from there. But we have not heard back.\n\nHowever upon talking to some friends in pest control, we could easily be looking at $350-500 in traps to make a reasonable dent in the population. And even then, it may still require professional assistance and cleaning.\n\nI literally have a deep phobia of roaches. Its actually my only and greatest fear. I haven't been able to sleep at all and want to cry because they are everywhere. My skin is crawling always because we keep finding them. I'm afraid to be alone in my house and want to leave so badly. I don't think I'm cut out for the extermination work (pulling out cabinets, drawers, pantries, garage, etc. and cleaning carcasses, eggs everywhere).\n\nEven though, I want to break the lease and leave the house as uninhabitable immediately there is a severe lack of housing availability in our city and it is next to impossible to acquire another place, especially with our current landlord holding all of our deposit/savings.\n\nPlease help! What do I do? I am considering living in my car or a hotel (if I can get it reimbursed) but am just at a loss of what to do. My goals are to not be living here with the roaches and to have the problem dealt with as timely as possible.", "summary": "California renter spends all money on move in/deposit. House uninhabitable by roaches. Has massive phobia of roaches. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_1ipp4i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I am a [22M] cant tell if [21F] whom i've been texting and chatting with for 2-3 weeks is interested or not", "post": "I ran into a girl i met a couple years back in 1st year of university. Only had a couple conversations with her back then so we weren't too close. We take the same train to work so we often end up chatting on the morning rides there and sometimes the way back. Usually fun conversations, a few somewhat awkward silences here and there.\n\nFrom what I've gathered, shes a sweet nice girl and super close with her family. We've also texted back and forth and I've gotten some good responses. Though I'm not sure if it's just her personality and if she's like that with her other male friends.\n\nI think she cares what I think of her, she checks her reflection on the train window and adjusts her hair when she thinks I'm looking away. But thats probably just a girl thing?\n\nAlso once she texted something slightly negative about someone she knew (whom I dont even know) and afterwards she immediately texted, \"i sound ungrateful right now! im not usually like that, k?\" \n\nSo last night I finally texted her at like 9pm asking if she wanted to grab a drink at this bar thats pretty close to where we live. She replied saying she couldnt tonight cuz she was in the middle of doing photo editting for a friend and her mom just made food for her. I said \"no biggie, another time then\" She followed up saying \"yea let's go next time\" with a smiley face. \n\nCan't tell if it's just an excuse. My buddy told me that if a girl doesnt specifically suggest another day it's a terrible sign and she probably doesn't rly want to go. I think there might still be hope but I haven't dated anyone for a year so I'm not very sharp on this kinda thing.\n\nWhat do you guys think?", "summary": "chatting and/or texting almost daily with girl for 2-3 weeks. finally asked her to grab a drink, she gave a couple excuses and said \"next time\". Not sure what this usually means."}
{"id": "t3_3vm997", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by joking about cancer", "post": "This happened yesterday. \n\nI was at lunch at school, sitting with my white friends because I have nowhere else to go. \n\nI was sitting next to one of my friends--we'll call him Tigg--and he's just really chill and never acts out like the rest of the group. \n\nAnyway, for some reason, the people at my table started doing some kind of really white and cringey \"roast-off\" which took form as a rap battle. \n\nTheir raps were complete garbage, even if it was a joke. Instinctively, since I'm one of those \"offensive humor\" people or something, I said \"your raps are giving me cancer.\"\n\nAbout 1.5 seconds later, it hit me. \n\nTigg's little sister has leukemia. \n\nI'm 110% sure he heard me, because he went from smiling in my general direction to instantly frowning and looking down at the table. For a solid 10 minutes I sat there thinking \"I fucked up; I *reaaaally* fucked up.\" I was hesitant to apologize because I would have to bring up the matter, which is also touchey. For the rest of lunch, we both went on and acted like I had never said anything, but I'm hoping that Tigg wasn't acting. I feel like more of an asshole than I usually do.", "summary": "Lunch friends were having a shitty rap battle, I said that their raps were cancerous, realized that the sister of the kid sitting next to me has Leukemia."}
{"id": "t3_40tr1l", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "My boss thinks I'm depressed", "post": "I've been with my company for almost 2 years. My boss just called me into her office to ask me if everything was okay. She said she's been worried about me for a while and is concerned that I'm depressed. She wanted to know if there was anything she could do. I apologized for appearing that way and said that it hadn't been my intention, that I'm fine (which I am) and that I'd certainly try to be more cognizant of it and it may be because I haven't been sleeping well. She said that she's advocating very hard for my promotion as our company will be expanding soon but needed to know if it was something I'd be able to handle. I assured her it was and that I'm excited for the future.  \n\nAbout a year ago I noticed that people at work didn't take me seriously. I assumed it had to do with my age as well as my bubbly and pushover personality. I decided to make a conscious effort to approach work more seriously and to be more assertive. I'm afraid that has given me the appearance of being depressed. I should note that she had me take a mental health day due to a small meltdown at work 6 months ago. (I cried a little bit when she asked if I was ok - I'm a crier, I don't know how to fix that). I took the next day off to take care of some things. I was working and going to school full time and had some health scares but I've addressed both of those and things are going smoothly. \n\nI'm not sure how I should handle any of this. What is this fine line between being assertive and coming across as depressed? Have a completely ruined my chances by appearing weak?", "summary": "Tried to be more assertive at work but now my boss thinks I'm depressed and is questioning my ability to handle future promotions."}
{"id": "t3_2n3onz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18/f] have no friends because of my [20/m] boyfriend", "post": "Throwaway because my boyfriend looks at my reddit..\n\nDuring the summer after graduating highschool, life was so great. I made a new group of friends that extended to about 10 people and we would all hang out just about every night. I loved it and I had so much fun with them. My boyfriend started working in a restaurant with his best friend, we'll call him Dave. Him and Dave have been friends for years. But when they started working together, they got into fights and they hardly talk now. \n\nSo, as a result we have not hung out with the group of friends in weeks. My boyfriend also throws a fit when I hang out with my other friends without him at night, and bringing him with me to hang out with a bunch of girls is not ideal. I would just like some time away from him and talk to my girl friends. \n\nTonight, Dave is having a party because he is moving half way across the country soon. I'm not invited, but an acquaintance to Dave is invited and asked me if I was going tonight. I'm just really fucking sad that I'm not longer invited to hang out even though I'm not involved with whatever conflict that Dave and my boyfriend have. \n\nI have lost just about all my friends over the last month. I'm depressed about it and I haven't made a single new friend in college. It's a somber thought to know you don't have any friends. Spending every night in my house is not what I want to do. I just want to enjoy other peoples company, but it seems they've forgotten about me and I'm not invited to hang out anymore. I just don't want to be alone anymore.", "summary": "boyfriend got into series of fights with his best friend, they no longer talk, which disbands me from the group of friends I had. No longer invited to his party or hanging out. I've lost all my friends."}
{"id": "t3_1rp2mz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my girlfriend [21 F] of one year, recently broke up because I treated her poorly.", "post": "Recently my girlfriend and I broke up. In the months leading up to our break up I was very stress and did not handle it well. This led me to treat her terribly. We both had a lot going on but she was able to curtail her outbursts at me, I failed to. I would start petty arguments and yell at her for different things. \n\nShe broke up with me earlier this month. We talked off and on until this past week. I finally was weak and had to tell her how I felt, how much she means to me and how much regret I feel.. Promised her I've identified and am working on what brought me down and promised will never treat her like that again.\n\nThis only made her more frustrated with me. She said she never will get back together with me and that she will never be with anyone who treats her like I did.\n\nI've been in longer relationships in my life but none of them felt the way this one did nor have I ever fall this hard for the person she genuinely is. For the majority of our relationship I treated her like a princess, up until other things came up and I got overwhelm.\n\nShe very raw right now, extremely mad at me, says she's done with me. I told her how I felt, albeit not to gracefully but I needed off my chest. My question is if anyone here has been in this situation: what was the ultimate result?", "summary": "Girlfriend broke up with me because I treat her badly (Insulting her). I lost myself for a while, that's why we failed. She doesn't want me back. Need some input."}
{"id": "t3_14vf8h", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What to do when you are being constantly verbally harassed and physically threatened?", "post": "I'm at the point where I would like to involve the police.  I know who they are but not why they have so much hate for me. The all believe they are hardasses and want to fight me and through their stupidity I believe they may begin to endanger my friends and family. **Context** - It is a group of four guys, my buddies and I used to be friends with but they just got stupider and stupider so we completely stopped associating ourselves with them. A few weekends ago they heard I was talking shit about them. I wasn't.... But they thought I was so it began with dumb prank calls, but soon they took their \"fun\" to one of my buddies cars and in the middle of the night and coated it with syrup and penut butter. He knew it was them and did nothing about this. Now they're calling me on private numbers and screaming swears and other \"demeaning\" things at me and its easy to tell its them because of their foreign accents. One of them slipped up and forgot to block his number so I assume thats a bit of evidence against them. They have also threatened me bodily harm through these calls and want me to fight them.  I know where they all live and feel its best to just talk to the police and give them their addresses and names and explain the situation, I can not deal with the anxiety of them causing any kind of damage to my home or endangering my family and friends (or myself for that matter). I believe at this point I have no other choice but to bring the police into the situation. But I want the advice of reddit first. (Extra info they are all between sixteen and seventeen and we are in high school together)", "summary": "Multiple friends and I are being harassed and threated by ex-\"friends\" and want to know what we should do."}
{"id": "t3_18gzhx", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [F/20] am in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend [M/20] and wondering if it's really worth it.", "post": "Let me preface in saying that my current long-distance boyfriend is the only serious relationship I've ever had. We have been dating for almost a year and a half. We met in college that we both went to and have now went back to our respective state, 9 hours away. I'm starting to think it's not worth it, especially me being so young. I love him but I also feel like I don't know what love is because I haven't had any serious relationships like he has. He tells me that he wants to marry me someday and it hasn't bothered me until recently. I don't want to make a life long mistake that I will regret. \n\nHe is so good to me and has never done anything wrong but I just seems lately like we don't connect on many things anymore. Because of the separation it seems like it's a chore to talk to him because it's so hard to know what's going on over texting and phone calls.", "summary": "Is it really worth it for 20 year olds to have a long-distance relationship when it's my first serious relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_3m08rz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[25/F] / [32/M] - new revelations after serious commitment", "post": "I've (25/F) been with my partner (32/M) for maybe five years now. We've been engaged for ~2 years and have a one year old child together. We recently bought a house together.\n\nAfter our child was born (so 4 years into the relationship) my partner \"opened up\" to me about his \"kinks\" - he wants to wear women's clothing, be dominated etc. Okay, not my thing but I'll work with it. Now a year later he's started telling me that he wants to cross dress, like in public. He says that he has felt like this for a long long time but was \"too scared\" to tell me.\n\nI don't know exactly how I feel about the cross-dressing thing. I don't know if this is going to \"progress\" any further. I don't think there's anything *wrong* with cross-dressing per se but I'm not attracted to women, I don't want to be judged for his choices (our families/friends WOULD judge) etc.\n\nI am absolutely FURIOUS that he waited until we had a child, bought a house... He waited until I was financially dependent on him to bring this up. I feel like it has the potential to change the nature of our relationship and I really don't like that he allowed our relationship to progress so far while lying (even if by omission) about this to me. I sort of feel like he waited until I was \"trapped\" to bring this up.", "summary": "partner waited 5 years, 1 child and 1 house to open up to me about wanting to cross-dress. Am I over-reacting to feel mad that he has allowed our relationship to progress so far on false pretenses?"}
{"id": "t3_16e6qa", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Permanent Life Insurance as a private reserve?", "post": "I just hired a new financial planner to help me get organized and create a plan for getting out from under my mountain of student loan debt. I'm 25 years old and have a decent paying job with high potential for growth and a sizable savings account - my biggest hurdle right now is a huge student loan debt with a high interest rate. \n\nHer advice is to take out a personal life insurance policy as a private reserve strategy. According to her, by taking advantage of the MEC I will enjoy tax deferred growth, tax free distribution, competitive returns, high contributions, collateral opportunities, no loss provisions, guaranteed loan options,  unstructured loan payments, liquidity, use and control. \n\nBasically I would use it as a personal bank over time and take liens against it to purchase a home, pay off my loans, etc. Sounds great right? Only problem is everything else I have found says this is bad advice if I ever plan to use the money before I die. I'm looking for a second opinion...any thoughts on this? Any alternative ideas to start growing my wealth?\n\nShe has also advised me to pay the minimum amount on my student loans for as long as I can. This is hard to do because my interest exceeds my payments right now and my principal is growing by about $700/month. Feeling pretty uncertain and any advice would help.  Thanks!", "summary": "Is using a permanent life insurance policy as a long-term personal investment strategy a good idea for a recent college graduate?"}
{"id": "t3_3cj7ld", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M, UK] fell in love with someone [27 M/F, US] who I've known for 2 months and have never met. How crazy am I?", "post": "We met online, on a random group video hangout thing, and were both flirting with each other. Our first video hangout lasted about 6 hours, and have easily clocked way over 50 hours since then. Other than that we spend an insane amount of time texting and are always sending snaps to each other. We're both fairly intense people and have already fallen madly in love with  each other. \n\nWe both work full time but I have more flexibility when it comes to taking time off so I'm going to visit for a couple of weeks in a few months.\n\nWe both realise how quickly we've fallen for the other, and have expressed an interest in pursuing something serious if the trip goes well. Neither of us wishes to be exclusive or anything at the moment, neither of us has sacrificed  hobbies, trips, social life or anything to spend time with each other, we mostly just sacrifice sleep to video chat and spend every free moment messaging each other. And yet it seems completely insane that I am considering moving country for someone that I've not only never met, but have only just met recently.", "summary": "Known for very short time, never met, considering moving country to live with her. 6 year age gap. How insane am I?"}
{"id": "t3_rbc0o", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I just lost the friendship of the woman I wanted to spend my life with. Help remind me there are more fish in the sea.", "post": "Background. We dated on and off for about a year. I'd been through two serious relationships before and feel I have a pretty good grasp on what I am looking for. After about six months of being apart but still great friends, she started dating my roommate's friend. A month in to them dating, I came to realize what an idiot I had been and asked her to take me back. It didn't go well and now we aren't even friends. I know I brought this on myself but I've never met anyone like her and can't see myself finding anyone more perfect for me. So please Reddit, give a guy some hope for the future.", "summary": "Asked my ex to leave her new bf for me and now we aren't friends. Cheer a guy up. When have things worked themselves out in the end for you?"}
{"id": "t3_27k1yg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [15M] with my Friend [15F] 9 months , she wants the D?", "post": "This girl and I have been friends since September (The beginning of the school year). And like many friendships it gets stronger within the first 2 months of knowing each other she friend zones me. I go along with it at the time i really wasn't into her. towards the beginning of the school year she kinds gave me her number in a friendly way.\n\nAbout 3 months later she brother zones me. now at that time i was into her, throughout our friendship i always hinted that i wanted to be  more than friends. let me explain her to you.\n\n she is pretty popular she was a freshman and she went to prom with a senior and she has always been in a relationship with someone.she has a lot of guy friends and she always showed more interest in them than me. she was liked when i walked her to class but when she saw another guy friend she would hug them and stuff like that. at the time she never showed an interest in me.on the other hand i have never been in a relationship before i have never liked a girl so much i wanted to date her until now. there was other girls throughout the year that plainly told me they liked me a lot but i felt like they weren't worth my time. \n\nnow back to the story she always considered me as a friend the whole school year. but a few days before school was over. she showed an interest in me, she started saying she would miss me a lot and she just started hugging me every chance she got. me liking her i went along with it. she says she wants to hang out this summer and i want to also but thing thing is i don't know how.\n\nwhere im stuck at is if she wants to hang out like friends or start dating because of previous behavior im confused.", "summary": "I really like this girl we have been good friends for about 9 months. she wants to hang out this summer and i want to be more than friends. how do i approach her?"}
{"id": "t3_10x9ph", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[F21] My boyfriend [M19] is treating another girl like he's courting her. What to do?", "post": "Me [F21] and my boyfriend[M19] of 2 years and 7months have been having issues lately (some are small issues like we've had in the past, others are new ones that's starting to bother me).\n\nWe've been friends for a good 2 years before we started dating so we know each other pretty well. We may not have much similarities, but that's one of the reasons why I love him, because I learn so much from him. He's a gamer-geek and because of him I was able to try out video games that I never thought I would ever play (ie Skyrim) and movies I thought I wouldn't watch (ie Pulp Fiction, Ultramarines). \n\nI've never had any trust issues with him before and vice versa. We've never had this kind of issue before and I'm not really sure if I should be having trust issues with him. I guess I'm just worried because we're in a different situation right now -- I've already graduated and he still has about a year of college left. \n\nI know he has new friends, and I'm happy that he does but sometimes he sends me mixed messages. He would tell me about his friends and his day but I can feel that he holds things back, especially when it's about a certain person. I guess what really worries me is that he's the type of person that isn't aware of what he/she is doing. He wouldn't know that someone is flirting with him unless they tell him upfront and he wouldn't know that he was flirting back or entertaining other girls unless someone tells him. I've noticed him falling into a \"pattern\" when he talks to a certain girl, similar pattern when he was starting to court me. We started out as close friends, and I can tell that they're starting to get pretty close. Is this a sign?\n\nI'm not sure if this is just my imagination or I'm onto something. I love him very much. I just want to make sure that this isn't just in my head. What do I do? I tried to talk to him about it, but he misunderstood me.", "summary": "BOYFRIEND IS TREATING ANOTHER GIRL THE SAME WAY HE STARTED TO TREAT ME BEFORE HE COURTED ME. WHAT SHOULD I DO? PLEASE HELP...."}
{"id": "t3_4kgmc3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] and my best friend [23 F] of ~3 years are in a bit of a pickle, need some thoughts", "post": "Okay, it's really tame for this subreddit but I need thoughts.\n\nI had developed feelings for her (she knew this) before and we went out for some drinks with a couple of mutuals (~3 others). We made out a few times (she initiated) and I left - about a week later, she texts me that she doesn't have feelings for me. Obviously, not her fault and I'd never be angry at her for not reciprocating feelings but rather, what she chose to do (she talked about this situation to other mutual friends we have). She showed some remorse, talked about her bad experiences with boys in the last couple of years and I basically implied that I had forgiven her. I have seen her a couple of times but she has been pretty awkward since (the make out was like, 2-3 weeks ago).\n\nCouple of nights ago, she held a gathering at her house that I was originally invited to - the night before, she texts me and says she's not sure if she wants me to come since she just wants to have a good time. In the morning, she basically says, \"yeah okay, just come\" - so I did - and later that night (after some drinking), she shouts at me that she was so angry that I turned up. I took it as a joke and was like, well, you did say specifically to come. Then she proceeded to tell the story to some of the people there while I was next to her (they essentially said that she was a bitch). \n\nAnyway, other details about the friendship...I feel like I'm not being respected (ie doormat) and what she did was emotionally abusive (because she was aware of my feelings). I can't think of many times that she has actually invited me out to do something with her, just as friends. I'm not sure on how I should proceed with this friendship - either cut it off (which might seem drastic, considering mutuals and all that), not talk to her until she initiates a conversation. Also, I don't want a relationship or anything with her anymore - not after all of this.", "summary": "made out with my bestfriend, not really happy with how I'm treated, not sure what to do - need balanced perspectives."}
{"id": "t3_vf837", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the worst thing that happened to you before, during, or after a music concert?", "post": "Last summer I went to see my favorite band, Ludo. We got to the train station and it was about 90 degrees. It was brutal. The intercom said the train would be arriving late. It then said it again once more a few minutes later. After about two hours, we got sick of waiting. One of my friends went online and apparently all the trains on that track were suspended. We were all dissappinted and decided to go home. WAIT, not over yet. We decide to go to the neighboring town to see if the trains are still running. They are! We run to the trains and all movie style like, we all jump onto the train right before the door closes. Due to the suspended track, this train was packed. Keep in mind it was 90 degrees. In the train it felt like 100. About half an hour in, my side starts to hurt. I tell my brother. He tells me to grow a pair. A few minutes later, my vision goes a bit fuzzy and fades completely to black. I don't remember much cause I was completely out of it, but my brother wrote on his blog about it. Turns out I compltely froze and my lips went white. My brother asks my friends for help. He told me to spit out my gum and he's holding out his hand. I barely heard him telling me. To lighten the mood a bit, I swallowed it. My brother kind of chuckled a bit. Some girl, who was pretty attractive, gave up her seat and gave me water. I could see again. I was chilled and shakey. We decided to get off the train. In the end we didn't go. It would be too hot in a crowded room. We in turn went to a friends house and watched My Neighbor Totoro.", "summary": "Me and a few friends went to a concert. Train line was suspended. Boarded train in neighboring town. I passed out. Instead watched My Neighbor Totoro at a friends house."}
{"id": "t3_q68m9", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "[request] I have an odd request for all of Loseit!!", "post": "An odd request indeed.\n\nI know a lot of you donate your clothes to goodwill or the likes, but I have a few projects i want to complete and do not have the supplies.  You lot can help though!  Let me explain\n\nI am looking for your old t-shirts.  The ones that just got too big.  The ones you've grown out of.   \n\nI want them to make yarn out of.  I'm a Vet Tech student, and we have some events soon that we sell things at.  We donate to the local shelter all the time, as well as perform essential veterinary procedures on the animals there so they can be adopted.  In order to help raise funds, i want to crochet pet beds to be sold.  They're awesome if you make em from t-shirt material because they're fluffier. \n\nSO I NEED YOUR HELP!!  \n\nOur thrift stores are expensive for some damned reason.  They expect $3.50 a shirt, and i can't afford that, since one shirt does not a bed make.  Hooray for being a poor college student =/   I know your guys have a lot of t-shirts that don't fit anymore, and i'd love to have em =)\n\nas for other fabrics, if its the same thickness as t-shirt, that should be fine.  Or if you have actual yarn sweaters that are not felted anywhere (armpit areas tend to get felted, as in, the yarn does not separate anymore. if you can't see through the yarn anymore then it's felted).  I can pull these apart and re-use the yarn, though it is a much more involved and lengthy process.  \n\nIf you would like to help out, please message me and i will give you my address. =)  I would appreciate the shirts be washed of course.  \n\nAll beds not sold will be used in our hospital for the dogs while they are staying with us there.  So you're still helping the sick puppies and kittens =)", "summary": "I need your t-shirts that are too big, message me for my address to send em to me. I will make puppy beds with em! "}
{"id": "t3_38qkrj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My wife [23f] and I [26m] have argued over a friend married to someone in prison", "post": "Our friend married a guy that she met while he was in prison. he's \n\nserving 20 to life. I don't feel comfortable having him around our son\n\nor our home, but my wife claims he's her son too. I feel she should \n\nrespect my wishes.\n\nShe has also told me not to make her choose between the friend or myself.\n\nI don't plan on doing that but I'm afraid that she would choose the friend anyways.\n\nI'm also afraid that this is going to lead to divorce. He's also \n\ngotten into trouble for conspiricy to commit murder against a CO \n\nsince he's been in prison. I feel like I'm being forced to be ok with \n\nthis but I'm not. My wife is also very easily convinced by this \n\nfriend.", "summary": "Friend married to a dangerous man and my wife wants me to be ok with him being around. Any tips? or am I overreacting?"}
{"id": "t3_2y2938", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "I fear the image I left at HS is still haunting me.", "post": "Yesterday I hit up a former high school classmate (now 22). We talked for about an hour about how our lives changed since then, what are we doing now for a living, etc. \n\nIt was a pretty funny conversation, and I thought it went well. We say each other goodbye, and she says she'd like to keep in touch. I feel the same and say that's fine with me.\n\nBefore this we never actually had a real conversation, so I felt this went pretty well and I sincerely looked forward to knowing her better.\n\nOk, so here's the deal now:\n\nToday, there's a post of hers on my FB feed that says something like this (in an image):\n\n\"I hate you, but I won't exclude you because I enjoy seeing you being ridiculous on the Internet. You freak\" \nfollowed by a comment from another of our former classmates \"you're going at it strong today!\"\n\nSo now, it's one of 2 things:\n\nI hugely misinterpreted everything that she said in our conversation, and she was blowing me off from the get-go\n\nor\n\nThat post isn't meant for me (pretty unlikely).\n\nI don't even know this girl that well, and she admitted that she didn't know much about me either. \n\nIs it possible for a person to hate you before she even gets to know you? \nI'm pretty sure you can't do that without outside interference. (i.e. her friends talking shit about me, they're all former classmates of ours) \nAnd this doesn't fit her personality at all, she used to be really nice to everyone.\n\nThis is a bit of a blow to be honest. I feel I should never talk to her again, I don't want to intrude where I'm not wanted, but I'm available to read any thoughts on this...", "summary": "I init'ed conversation with a former HS classmate, thought it went fairly well, next day she calls me a freak over a PUBLIC FB post."}
{"id": "t3_2rcr21", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to teach my nephew how to play football", "post": "I was helping my dad babysit my five year old nephew yesterday. We were up in his room, where he showed me a plush football he had received as a gift. We started tossing it back and forth and I decided it was time to show him how to snap a football.\n\nI turned around, crouched, and hiked him the ball. He started laughing uncontrollably, repeating that I had showed him my butt (I guess I should mention that he is in a butt/poop phase right now). He started yelling \"butt!\" and trying to add other random words to it... and this was when his (uptight) mother walked in.", "summary": "Tried teaching my nephew how to hike a football; when his mother walked in, he informed her I had just shown him how to do a \"butt-shooter\""}
{"id": "t3_3qibh7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [16] and I [15] are having difficulty communicating.", "post": "As the title says, we just don't know what to talk about or really how to talk to eachother. I really like her (a lot) and she feels the same towards me, and I just don't know what to do. She was grounded for 2 months a couple days ago (her mom's a little crazy when it comes to punishments), so seeing her in person is sadly out of the question. We're both just as awkward in person, anyway... \n\nI've seen on some other places that this happens in every relationship at some point and not to be worried about it, but I never see how to deal with it. Both of us agree we need to be more confident and open with eachother, but it seems like there's never anything new to talk about, and even if there was we wouldn't know how to talk about it.", "summary": "GF and I don't really know why we're having trouble relaying feelings and don't know what to do about it."}
{"id": "t3_3eos1g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my ex [15 F] who I dated for five months without kissing", "post": "First, some background information. We are both in high school, I am a junior and she's a sophomore. We're both pretty smart and I'm a bit of a nerd. We both do theater at our high school but hadn't known each other long before our relationship. I asked her out on Valentine's Day, and broke up with her just a few days ago.\n\nPretty much throughout our entire relationship, I felt like I never really emotionally (or physically) connected with her, because whenever I tried to talk to her about something serious (like our feelings for each other, kissing, etc.) she would reply with \"I don't know\" to my questions, and seem to appear slightly irritated at me asking it, although she didn't remain angry at me at all. She told me that she has an in ability to talk about her feelings to others, including her own family, and she gets stressed and \"shuts down\" whenever she attempts to. I really am attracted to her and honestly besides this, she doesn't have a lot of flaws. She's polite, kind, works hard in school, and cares about her future. However, last week I basically told her that i couldn't take the lack of connection anymore and said that we should part ways for now. Obviously I miss her, but I really didn't see any other option. Does she have some sort of actual disorder, or is it just a part of being a teenager? Should I wait and see if she matures to where she's comfortable talking about stuff and then try a relationship with her again? I really just want another opinion in this because I feel hopeless.\n\n(Please only serious replies)", "summary": "Girlfriend didn't seem emotionally mature so I broke up with her, but am wondering what the best thing to do is now"}
{"id": "t3_161x01", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "How to make my money work for me?", "post": "Dear PF,\n\nOne of my goals in the coming year is to understand and maximize my monetary situation.  I currently have only school and car debt, which, combined, is less than $45k (~$40k school, ~$2k car).  I have a solid job, where I currently make ~$70k/year, and I expect a 2-6%/year increase (not including bonus pay, and promotional salary increases), and I have a decent credit score (last check was a few months ago; 750).\n\nI am not against reading to understand my finances for myself, and being able to understand and maximize them is one of my long term goals.  I'm concerned that with my current income, situation, and lack of understanding, that I won't be doing myself the *most* good on my own.   Is it worth the while (ever) to pay someone to interpret and explain your finances to you?  \n\nI'm not against working with someone at fee to learn about these things, or even letting someone else manage a portion of my finances fully in order to help maximize them.  I am concerned with where one goes to get that sort of advice or information, and if it's a useful investment.  Other than 'self teaching', I wouldn't know where to turn for financial planning advice- my CU? My parents in another state? Their financial planner? Peers in this state? Co-workers?", "summary": "Is it beneficial to pay for financial advice and planning?  And if so, where do you go for that?  I've been going ad hoc forever and now I want to get all long-term serious about my finances."}
{"id": "t3_r91s5", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "For good or for evil, what's the most vindictive thing you've done to an ex?", "post": "I'll start: My ex and I had plans to move in together, signed a lease and everything. Three weeks before we were supposed to move in, we got in a stupid fight and he ended up breaking up with me. In a text message. After two years of dating. Refusing to talk to me otherwise, a few days later he told me he had found a new place to live and that I should do the same. No explanation. I was supposed to crash at his place for a week after my lease expired; he literally said he didn't care that I'd be homeless for that week. When I asked for an explanation, he texted my mom 27 creepy messages about me, about how I deserved this, etc. I told him to stop harassing my family and asked what the hell his problem was, he said if I ever contacted him again he'd call the police. TO THIS DAY, nine months later, I have no idea what I did or if he just went off the deep end.\n\nLuckily, my now-landlord let me move in early so I only had one day of homelessness. But after all the shit my ex put me through (this is just the beginning), I chose not to find a new roommate. His name is still on the lease so he is still legally obligated to pay every month. He does. I don't regret it.", "summary": "boyfriend of two years dumped me three weeks before move-in date via text message; I'm making him pay his rent."}
{"id": "t3_12rtdy", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do you deal with a relationship ending due to the other person changing?", "post": "Hey reddit, I've been in a relationship for the last year and the girl is amazing.  She has complimented every bit of me and I've thoroughly enjoyed the time we've spent together.  Our relationship was great, we never fought.  I've honestly never met a girl like her before. However, we have decided to break up due busy schedules not allowing time for a relationship, but our feelings are fully in tact.  I figured that once our schedules slowed down, like they will in the next month, we would be back together again.\n\nThe problem is, I'm noticing that we are just becoming two different people.  I absolutely love her and I'm willing to adjust to keep her in my life, I'm just not seeing that from her.  I'm a rational person and I understand that sometimes people do change and grow apart.  As much as I hope this doesn't happen, I'm starting to think we never will be together again.\n\nSo my question is, how am I supposed to deal with this?  It's not like we have done each other wrong or anything to cause a change of heart towards her.  She's become my best friend and it's sad to see her slowly fade out of my life.  \n\nTo make it clear, I'm not trying to force her back into my life.  I understand people change.  I just want to know how I'm supposed to deal with it, because I'm having a very hard time knowing the person I love won't be there much longer.", "summary": "My girlfriend and I took a break, but we are changing.  My feelings are fully there.  How do I deal with this?"}
{"id": "t3_3ecbmj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Gf(23,F) of two years \"fell out of love\" with me (24,M) soon after starting a strong birth control regiment. What should I do?", "post": "I'm completely at a loss & could use some advice.\n\nBasically, my girlfriend started taking a new, significantly stronger birth control pill to regulate her period about 3 months ago. 3 weeks ago she said she feels she's fallen out of love with me & wants to end things. She said it's nothing I've done & that she's \"afraid of hurting me\" & she's had \"an uneasy feeling about the relationship recently\". \n\nOur relationship had been amazing up until this point. Everyone in her life has told her how amazing we are for each other & she's always agreed. Friends she hasn't seen in years can immediately tell that she's happier than she's ever been because of me. This came out of nowhere & completely blindsided me.\n\nWe didn't officially \"break up\" 3 weeks ago, but we haven't been in contact since, until yesterday. I'll be meeting with her tomorrow to talk. If she still insists it's nothing I've done...what should I say?\n\nI honestly think it's due to the hormonal changes the pills are causing. If something comes up tomorrow like another guy or something, I don't bring it up. But if it's nothing like that, how do I approach the subject gracefully? Nobody wants to hear, \"Hey, your emotions aren't your actual emotions, the drugs you're on are causing them\". I'm so scared of losing her over something that can be fixed. Help?", "summary": "GF wants to end things because she has \"an uneasy feeling\" & thinks she doesn't love me anymore. I think it's due to the strong birth control she recently started taking. How to approach the subject?"}
{"id": "t3_3o6k9l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [29m] give my gf [26f] mixed signals", "post": "It seems I've gotten myself in a pickle somehow and I'm not sure how to proceed. I've dating my gf for a couple months now. We developed a fantastic connection unlike anything I've ever experienced before. Everything seemed to fit together so nicely. There have been a few bumps but we've survived. Last night something strange happened (from my perspective). We and one of her friends were in an apartment. I went to the fridge to get some beer. This fridge is really dirty. The power often goes out in India so there is some fungus in fridge. I make a joking comment and say:\n\n> As a single man, I have seen my fair share of disgusting fridges, but this one takes the cake.\n\nThis deeply upset her because she heard it as \"I am currently single\" where I was using an infinitive to refer to my past experiences. Now she is extremely uncertain about me and my feeling towards her. She said she thinks I think subconciously I'm still single. Which is all extremely curious to me. Naturally I'm quite confused by the situation. I understand why she interpreted the sentence in that way, the temporality is implicit, not explicit. I don't fault her for that, not is it important. The communication failed and so be it. She explained some other things to me (which I can't understand either). I'm doing my best to be patient, kind, and understanding. At the end of the day she feels this way because of my actions (regardless if I had that intention). Right now I feel like she does not trust me at all. If I had heard those same words I wouldn't have given it a second thought. She had the opposite reaction which to me tells the only difference is the frame of mind. Like if this is enough to push her over the edge then she's probably very close to the edge. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I gain insight into her perspective? I'm not really sure what to do differently.", "summary": "GF & I have communication problems which is making the relationship unstable and preventing her from trusting me. Not sure what do to differently or how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_4fa5q7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21F] with my boyfriend [20M], he's staying out late after work. Help me control my reaction.", "post": "So, my boyfriend usually never stays out after work. On Sundays and Mondays, he drives his coworker home, and recently they've been getting a little closer. Tonight he called me (we usually talk on the phone after he gets out of work) and told me he's going to his coworker's house to hang out and play vid games or something. Coworker is a guy too by the way, if that matters.  \n\nWhy does this make me upset? I just really look forward talking to him at the end of the night, and especially since he knew I had a hard day today, it upsets me that we won't be talking tonight. I know I'm being unreasonable. Am I insecure? Am I needy? Is that why I'm reacting in this way? \n\nOn the phone, he asked me how my day was and asked me what I was doing, etc. etc. -- just a quick check-up. Then he said he'd call me after he leaves his coworker's if I'm still awake. And he told me that if I wanted, I could call him to say goodnight when I started to fall asleep. \n\nI just miss him. I won't see him until Tuesday or Wednesday, and we haven't seen each other for like a week. I know this question seems silly, but my neediness is really something I've been trying to conquer, so I'm trying to fight these feelings of being a bit upset.", "summary": "Bf is hanging out with his coworker after work so we can't talk tonight. I know it's stupid, but I'm trying to fight my feelings of sadness (and slight anger) at this. Constructive advice wanted."}
{"id": "t3_jpsun", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Girl,sleeping with two bi boys", "post": "First post on reddit ! it's the first time i'm doing this ( sleeping with two guys, who happen to be bi as well) and i'm a bit confused about the situation . It started as them being interested in me and then I found out they're interested in each other, they hesitated to tell me. I feel a bit like I'm the third wheel ( umm.. yeah?) of the wagon now but I'm not sure if i'm just being paranoid or they don't have interest in me anymore. Also I feel like one of the boys is a bit jealous on my relationship with the other one . \n\nI want to know if anyone's been through a similar situation, such a triangle and if there is any advice that they can give me so that I won't mess this up and everyone can just be happy and enjoy this.", "summary": "I'm sleeping with two guys who like each other, i think one is jealous, i need advice from people who have been in a similar situation."}
{"id": "t3_1t8ann", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My mother in law [50.f] planned a gathering with my boyfriend [24.m] and excluded me [24.f], am I wrong in feeling bad?", "post": "My mother in law [50.f] planned a gathering with my boyfriend [24.m] and excluded me [24.f], am I wrong in feeling bad?\n\nWe live together and have been for well over a year. My parents include him in everything. Never have we just not included him if he is off of work. His mother asked him today to spend time at a theme park....never mentioning me. \n\nNow, I realize sometimes mothers want family time. But I guess I just feel a little bad since, well...I live with him and have that day off as well. Had she asked, both she and my boyfriend know that I'll most likely say \"you need some family time--go take her out!\" Or something. They both know me well enough that I wouldn't and don't like to intrude.\n\nToday, my boyfriend spent all day spoiling me so I know he noticed I got kinda upset because I went from giddy to kinda quiet. I tried hard to hide that I felt bad. I admitted and he said he understood and that she probably didn't mean it that way. It's his mom and he loves her so I know he's trying to get me to not feel so bad but it sucks. \n\nYesterday, too, I tried talking to her. Her and I used to talk about relationships and I tried getting advice from her. My boyfriend has an issue with his temper (real great guy but he has a short fuse) and I asked her since she's known him all his life what she thinks I can do that'll help him out. She was short and said she was busy and had to figure it out. I apologized. I was kind of shocked because she was always open and tried hard to advise me before, and seemed happy to do so...I don't know if this lead to that? It's weird.", "summary": "My mother in law [50.f] planned a gathering with my boyfriend [24.m] and excluded me [24.f], am I wrong in feeling bad?"}
{"id": "t3_2rvb2a", "subreddit": "weddingplanning", "title": "[Funny] More conversations from the FH", "post": "My beloved FH is working from home today, drat his eyes, while I'm an hour away in the office. While thinking longly of my bed, I realize that the save the dates that I'd designed & had printed should be coming in today, so I send him a quick message so he'd keep an eye open for them.\n\n>**Me**: Oh hey--We should be getting STDs today\n\n>**FH**: I don't want them!\n\n>**Me**: lol\n\n>You sure?\n\n>I paid a lot of money to get some...\n\n>**FH**: what are you referring to\n\n>**Me**: Save the Dates lol\n\n>**FH**: you spend too much time on that subreddit\n\n>and if you keep it up, I'm going to only speak to you in programming jargon\n\n>**Me**: :'(\n\nI mean, really--who doesn't want STDs?! ;)\n\nHope this story made you smile today!", "summary": "I am threatened with jargon when FH decides I spend too much time on /r/weddingplanning."}
{"id": "t3_1e07qe", "subreddit": "cats", "title": "Thinking of adopting. I am away from home for 11h/day; is that too long to leave a cat?", "post": "There was a stray at my apartment complex that was super nice and brought me \"presents\" all the time.  It disappeared one day, and I've felt guilty about not taking it in ever since.\nI've been thinking about rescuing a cat.  I'd get an older black cat, since I hear their adoption rates are low. (In fact, my co-worker who claims to love animals [she has \"the license plate to prove it\"] advised me against getting a black cat simply because she's religious and superstitious.)\n\nI am away from home 11 hours each day (work, commuting, workout, misc), and when I am home, I am usually working on my new side-business.  I'm worried I won't have enough time to play with the kitkit... am I nuts or is this a real cause for concern?  I don't want the cat to get bored/sad while alone in a small apartment for most of the day... especially after taking out of a shelter where it had plenty of other caretakers and cat-companions.", "summary": "Busy guy wants to rescue a cat.  Will it like having a home with no other cats, and where its owner is gone most of the time on weekdays?"}
{"id": "t3_208ya5", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Vehicle forfeiture after brother does snow drifting", "post": "Fellow Redditors,\n\nI'm a long time reader with almost no contributions. I've watched many of you assist others, complete strangers, demonstrating the strong community built of selfless individuals here. I sincerely need some guidance here and would appreciate the same. I'm located in NJ.\n\nWhile I was 1500 miles away on a business trip, my brother (17, minor, licensed, and insured) took my car out after a snowstorm and went to a local football field in my community to do donuts - residents apparently called the police and they arrived shortly thereafter. He states he immediately stopped and waited for the officer to confront him. The police ended up towing the vehicle to the station (where it currently resides) and simply brought my brother home to his legal guardian, my grandmother. No official correspondence has been received from the police department at this point - its been 9 days since the incident.\n\nAttempts at retrieving the car have been unsuccessful. Initially, I was told that I could not obtain the car as there was a hold pending investigation and that I could get it back once these investigations were complete. Today, after countless calls to both the trooper that was on site, and the sargent on duty at the time, I was contacted and told that they have applied for forfeiture on the vehicle. \n\nDue to the ongoing and aggressive nature of my brothers activity, I've been told there is $3800 worth of damage. I want to make it clear that I acknowledge my brothers wrongdoing and will ensure, as the courts most certainly will, he repays back the township in more ways then one.\n\nMy issue here is that I've committed no crime but am somehow being punished. I'm an upstanding citizen that has no record, is a good person, and treats everyone fairly. Is this legal? Is it possible I could lose my car over this? If so, how can someone take my property like this? What are my options? What can I do?\n\nIt's worth noting that the car is complete legal and is registered, insured, and maintained as required by law. Additionally, there were no weapons, controlled substances, gambling, or prostitution involved here. According to NJ sanctions on this topic, apparently they play a role in the outcome. What I've stated is what happened, nothing more.", "summary": "17 year old brother takes car I own, does donuts in the snow of a county football field causing damage, police impound it and state I may never get it back."}
{"id": "t3_w4lp1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I saw my friend's girlfriend with another guy. Should I tell him?", "post": "A little backstory here. \n\nA few years ago, I started a two years program preparing students for selective schools (French system, nevermind). I befriended the guy, let's call him Max (18 at the time), and we would hang out with two other friends I made at the same time. A few months later, he started dating his girlfriend, let's call her Jen, who was in the same class.\nThey became very exclusive of everyone else, and spent all their time together, leaving no space for other people, so we stopped talking although we were in the same class. They stayed together for the two years of the program, and then were admitted to different schools, in two different cities.\nA few weeks ago, Max started chatting with me on Facebook. It was the first time he spoke to me since the last time I saw him two years ago. He told me him and Jen were still dating, and I was truly amazed at their commitment to each other.\n\nA few days later I saw her in the subway with another guy (we live in the same city). They seemed fery flirty, and then started kissing. It was obvious they were dating. She didn't see me though.\n\nNow I really don't know what to do. Usually I would keep my mouth shut because this is none of my business, plus Max is not a close friend so I don't know if I'm in the right position to tell him. But I should mention here that Max spends a LOT of money in Jen. I always thought she took advantage of him (he's kind of wealthy), at least let's say I don't have the same conception of a relationship. Still, it's bugging me to see that he keeps buying her explensive clothes, taking her to restaurants, trips... for nothing. It's not like she cheated on him once, she is literally dating another guy at the same time.\n\nSo Reddit, what should I do?", "summary": "my friend is dating a girl for whom he spends a lot of money. She is dating another guy at the same time. Should I tell him?"}
{"id": "t3_2yd1il", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend and I [18/M] both like the same girl [18/F]", "post": "I've always had an eye on this girl \"lissa\" and we've been friend/acquaintances for a while. I'll see her nearly every day and well say hey and small talk for a bit before we go our separate ways.\n\nWe have prom coming up A week or so ago I was just having another one of those nice short convos when her and I realised stuff I hadn't realised before. She had pretty blue eyes and lush blonde hair that I'd love to play with. So I delayed whatever I had and just talked to her. It was great! We had common interests and we really hit it off.\n\nWhenever I talk to a girl I like I really get nervous and I hadn't texted her before so it took me a while to balls up and text her for the first time. It was going really well! She was laughing and we were both having a great time. However abruptly out of nowhere she just stopped the texts. It was just a jolt.\n\nI don't make much of it. So next day (still haven't got a text back) I was just talking to my best friend about Lissa for the first time and he tells me my other friend had also been talking to her for a week and wants to go to prom with her.\n\nI'm just not sure what to do at this point. We were really hitting it off until the sudden cut off and my friend who is also interested in her has also been talking to her for a week. Do I go for her and ask her to prom in person; do I talk to my other interested friend?", "summary": "Girl I like also has interest from one of my other friends. Do I go for her or leave her for my friend?"}
{"id": "t3_2s37n9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M]with my ex [17 F] of two years, I feel like im back at square one", "post": "So, we broke up during the second week of december, which was right before winter break. During winter break, I was sad and laid in bed crying for the first couple days etc. Then I started having fun with friends, hitting the gym, and shit. I felt an improvement and that I was starting to move on. She moved on way quicker than me shes already back with her ex. \n\nNow, today was the first day of school back from break. I cant stop looking at her. She talked to me about some classwork and it was hell. I just feel like shit again. I fe lonely again. When I saw her, that feeling of emptiness came back. I dont know how to fix this please help.", "summary": "Feel like I've moved on during winter break, but come back to school to feel like im right back at square one."}
{"id": "t3_1io8pq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[23F] broke up with my [25M] boyfriend after almost a year of dating. Ended badly. Now don't know what this means.", "post": "A few months ago I broke up with my boyfriend, because I felt we were drifting apart.  I was feeling lonely, and tired of feeling like he would rather be doing something else.  I don't really think all of me wanted to end the relationship, I just wanted to see that he really wanted to be with me. We were dating long distance as well, which makes things even more complicated.\n\nAfter I told him I wanted to breakup, he didn't say anything.  I would try and text and call him and tell him that I wanted to talk, but he would never reply.  He did text me once in the early morning, when I'm assuming he was drunk, to tell me that I ruined everything. And then he never replied when I tried to bring it up. Eventually I just gave up, realizing that he just didn't want to speak to me ever again.\n\nThen, this afternoon, he texted me for the first time since our breakup, and it was a scary picture of something I'm terrified.  He used to do this all the time when we were dating, and always as a joke. So I don't know what he was thinking, or why he did it. I'm really confused.", "summary": "Broke up with my boyfriend.  He then refused to talk to me whenever I texted or called so I gave up.  Texted me for the first time this afternoon with a scary picture of something I'm terrified of."}
{"id": "t3_115df2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The good girl(26) was revealed as the slut I M(28) don't know what to do now.", "post": "I meet this girl 6 months ago. It had taken me some time to get her number but from our very first date everything was magic. She was reserved throughout mostly but at the end of the night after a little dancing I went in for the kiss. It was a first date but it went through quite nicely. Days later we spoke about the kiss and she said it was something she didn't do. She said that she wasn't like that and that she was a good girl. I said fine. That gave me confidence that I was unique while also instilling in my mind that this girl has some virtue to her(which to me is good). 2 weeks pass and we have sex. 2 months pass I'm in love. 3 months later she drops a massive bomb on me.\nShe tells me that she was traveling the world for some time and she would sleep with random guys a lot. It got so much that she was one week having sex with 3 different guys. I felt like all the stuff she told me about {she doesn't kiss on the first date and she's a good girl} were disingenuous. She even told me she was having unprotected sex with one guy because he refused to wear condoms and she just kept sleeping with him ( while sleeping with the others too). She even made it a point to sleep with him one more time before leaving that particular country. What would you do or think about this situation. I'm at a loss and my brain is fucked behind thinking about it.", "summary": "girl poses as virtuous (I don't do that type) guy falls in love then months later girl tells guy she was a massive international sperm toilet for guys who she calls \"gross\" while traveling"}
{"id": "t3_1gq4a8", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My sister (19/f) is going out with a guy (35/m). And as her brother, I find this really, really weird.", "post": "I'm not sure if it's just a phase, a normal relationship, a common occurrence, or a potential pedophilia-type situation. But here is the story:\n\nAbout six months ago, my sis announced that she has a boyfriend, I didn't really care much about the relationship until I found out about that guy's age, which is 35. I'm not a pro on relationships, but according to my experiences and some logical thinking, that doesn't really seem 'right.' My parents (asian, chinese) are sh*tting themselves and I'm just worried about the motives of this particular man. The only info I got on him is that he and my sis hooked up because they met each other through music (she plays the violin and he prolly plays the cello), I don't know much about him as my sister stopped communication for 6 months already, because she claims that my parents have been telling her to 'be careful' and she does not view the guy as a threat, etc, etc.", "summary": "> My sis hooked up with a 35 yr old guy, she is 19, something seems fishy. What should I do? Communications have been halted. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_2kpjas", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Weird situation. My wife[23F] and I[30M] are probably getting a divorce. Unrelated, my ex-wife[28] from 10 years ago is for sure getting a divorce. Ex-wife and I have one kid together. She suggested we become roommates. Thoughts?", "post": "I married my ex-wife because I knocked her up and yeah, that was two stupid moves. We got divorced maybe a year and a half later. The divorce was really stupid, and she was really bitter at first, but 10 years later we have a pretty good co-parent relationship. She's been married 8 years, has two kids with her current husband. I've been married 4 years, and have no kids with my wife.\n\nMy ex-wife calls me crying last week because she thinks she's getting a divorce. Friday she tells me she was served with divorce papers. I tell her about my wife going insane and getting locked up in the mental hospital, and that we're probably getting divorced too.\n\nShe jokingly said that we should rent a house and be roommates. A few hours after getting off the phone with her, I was like, that doesn't sound like a bad idea. I talked to my ex-wife some more and I told her that it sounds like a good idea, but it's really something I need to think on. I don't want to be setting ourselves up for failure.\n\nIt sounds like a good idea to me. Split bills 50/50. No romantic interest between the two of us. Get to see my son daily.\n\nMy mother brought up that this wasn't a good idea because we have bad history together and would fight. But my ex and I have agreed that we would not be romantically involved if we moved in together.\n\nAlso, a friend said this could be bad for my son if he thinks his parents are getting back together. We divorced when he was 1, so he has never known us together.", "summary": "Ex-wife is getting a divorce, I might be getting a divorce, ex suggests moving in together as roommates."}
{"id": "t3_21m5sq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My husband [28M] has anger problems that scare me [28F], how can I make him see the problem?", "post": "I've been with my husband for 10 years, married for 4. Overall we're very happy. No infidelity or money issues and we're both on the same page for the big stuff like kids, home ownership and where we'd hideout if there was a zombie apocalypse. There's just one thing that I can't cope with and it's getting worse.\n\nHe has real anger issues when things don't go his way. \n\nHe screams, shouts and throws things when he loses in a video game or if his sports teams concede a goal. If the playstation won't connect with the TV or the gadget he's trying to fix won't go back together he'll swear and hiss and generally become very unpleasant. \n\nI'll say now that I have no fear for my personal safety. Although he can be violent, it's never to me or any living thing. That isn't the source of my concern.\n\nI grew up with a very violent and abusive father. The whole family walked on eggshells around him because you never knew what would set him off. I have mental and physical scars from my childhood and one of them is a deep fear of angry men.\n\nI have explained this to my husband in every way I can think of. I've spoken to him when he is calm, pointed it out to him when he is getting angry and, unproductively, engaged in long arguments about it when he is in a full blown rage. Nothing I can say or do seems to stop him, he won't remove himself from the things that make him angry. He won't turn off a game when he starts to get mad, he refuses to step away from his triggers and just calm down. If I point out that he's getting angry, he just gets worse and will swear nastily at me.\n\nHis anger causes anxiety attacks in me, I can't help but be reminded of a time when I had to fear a man I should have been able to trust. He knows this and yet refuses to change.\n\nWhat can I do?", "summary": "SO of 10+ years gets incredibly angry, knows I have anxiety issues because of it but won't stop. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_36y78s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20F] girlfriend and I [22 M] still haven't had sex after 7months of dating and still no \"I love you\"", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for 7months and I've never fallen for someone like this before and she tells me that is the case with her as well. However, I am not able to tell if the fact that she is still not ready to have sex as a red flag or not. She is a virgin and is waiting for the right person, it isn't for religious reasons. But it worries me that after this much time she still doesn't believe that I am \"the right person\". We still hook up and do other things and after talking about sex a couple times I basically just said I wouldn't ever bring it up and let her decide when she is ready. I don't want to pressure her but I don't know what to do.\n\nIn addition, neither one of us has said those big 3 words yet after that much time. I am certain that I feel that way towards her, I have completely fallen for her, but I don't know how I feel about expressing that before we are completely intimate. I also have reservations about being the first to say it because I have always been the one to initiate conversations about our relationship and intimacy. It would mean so much more to me if I heard her say it first rather than the \"yeah, me too\" that I am so used to hearing.\n\nShould all of this be a red flag that maybe things aren't going to go anywhere? Should I let her find someone else that maybe she would feel more comfortable with? I'm not sure what to do.", "summary": "GF and I still haven't had sex or said I love you after 7months. I'm not sure if this should be a red flag."}
{"id": "t3_3an79e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [18F] ex-girlfriend is still in love with me [19M], I love her but I'm not in love with her and I have no idea what to do", "post": "We were dating for a while until a few months back, since then we've been off and on, not exactly seeing each other but neither of us have moved on. Over time my feelings have became less and hers have became more (she still gets butterflies from me, I get none from her). \n\nI feel as though I'm no longer in love with her whereas she's in love with me. We still see each other but emotions are running high and I have no idea what to do as I don't want to be in a relationship, but I don't want to lead her on. \n\nThe problem is I want to let her go but the thought of her being with anyone else is heartbreaking for me. I know I'm stopping her from being happy but I can't bear the thought of her falling in love with anyone else. I realise this is extremely selfish and that I'm messing her around and that isn't fair on her.\n\nI can't be in a relationship with her however because I'm not in love with her and therefore it wouldn't be right on my part. I can't even spend time with her or go out to the cinema etc. with her because of the same reason. I just feel so unbelievably guilty. \n\nI love her so so much and I just want the best for her. But I just can't let her go. \n\nAnother thing that is stopping me from letting go is the totally irrational fear that I won't find anyone else and that no one will fall in love with me again. And I realise it's totally stupid to think that but I can't stop myself from thinking it. It's almost like an innate fear.\n\nPlease, if anyone can give me some advice I'd appreciate it so much.", "summary": "Ex-girlfriend is in love with me. I love her but I'm not in love with her, I want to let her go and let her be happy but I can't. Help."}
{"id": "t3_1dsrzw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20f] first relationship. He says he might finally be able to feel deep feelings again...but after six months?", "post": "Okay, I am just very confused. I really need unbiased perspective on this. So this is a \"long distance\" relationship (we see each other on average every 2 weeks, but now get a full few weeks together), and we've been dating almost six months. He told me at the beginning of our relationship that he was...damaged? Not sure what word he used. Seemingly from whatever happened with his last girlfriend. I think they had been separated for 7-8 months before we started dating, and their relationship was like a year and a half.\n\nWell last night I finally got the details of what he meant. He says he thought she was perfect, and that his senior year when he was dating her was the best of his life. But that then she went to school and decided he wasn't as important to her as she had said. That messed him up, and he admits he shouldn't have believed she was perfect. But he says ever since that break up he hasn't felt capable of feeling deep feelings, and that now he is feeling anxious because he thinks maybe we are at that stage...and that so far he has been very guarded (I have too).\n\nI got upset because that means at the beginning of the relationship he knew he couldn't feel deep feelings. I didn't think that was fair to me. And I don't want to have to \"coach\" someone into feeling again...I shouldn't have to. It also seems like he's not over her...but he claims he is enough and no one is ever COMPLETELY over another person. Am I right in being upset? I have no idea how to proceed from here...\n\nAnd an outside issue--for the past few days I have been really distant with him because frankly he was annoying and I am pretty pessimistic about us spending longer than 2 years together (that is when I graduate)...I haven't told him that.", "summary": "Boyfriend of six months finally says he may be able to develop deep feelings for me...but apparently has been closed off and incapable of doing so for our whole relationship thus far. What does this mean for me?"}
{"id": "t3_2olkpy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "The girl I'm dating [20f] told me [20m] that she is anorexic. How can I be supportive?", "post": "I've been talking to this girl for a little while now, and she told me a few days ago that she doesn't eat. She is extremely thin, technically underweight, and thinks she is fat. \n\nShe was in a verbally abusive relationship before, and I feel like that's where this insecurity comes from. It's just so upsetting to me to think of how she starves herself to try to feel pretty, when she could eat all she wants every day and still be the cutest and most interesting person in the room. \n\nI've never dealt with a situation like this before, and would love it if anyone who has had experience with this (an SO who was anorexic or someone who has been through it themselves) could give me some tips on ways to help her gain confidence and let her know that she is in fact beautiful on the inside and out no matter what she weighs.", "summary": "She thinks in order to be attractive she can't eat, and I want to help her feel better about herself and to be healthy and happy. Thanks in advance for the help."}
{"id": "t3_1ijeyo", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[41F] hate my husband's [43M] foot fetish, but I've been playing along for years. Can I back out of it now?", "post": "So my husband has a very particular foot fetish. He likes injured feet/dirty feet. If I step on something or go barefoot on pavement or for long periods of time, it's a huge turn-on for him. \n\nWe've been together for 20 years, and I used to kind of get off on it, too. But most times I just kind of feel like a non-descript body attached to a pair of feet. I hate that the fetish is a requirement for him to be turned on -- that's the basic definition of a fetish, right? When he goes to rub my feet or stares at them, I feel more turned off than anything.\n\nThis is such a part of his sexuality that I'm terrified of being honest with him about it. But it's so uncomfortable for me that I'd rather not have sex at all.", "summary": "I've had enough of my husband's foot fetish, which I initially encouraged. Do I tell him or keep acting?"}
{"id": "t3_qfryk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My life seems to be going to shit, and my boyfriends keeps getting better and better.  How do I stop from being a bitter bitchface when it's not his fault?", "post": "Basically I've had a pretty bad few weeks.  I am a teacher (female, 25 years old), currently working in a completely shitty school which doesn't care about anything but making money-which makes my job difficult and unpleasant on a daily basis. I have a child with clear emotional instability and a possible mental disability and everyone keeps saying they will help me but does nothing, so I get to deal with a screaming irrational little dude on a daily basis. I got my wallet stolen. I was pushed off my motorbike by some crazy bitch and now my whole right side is covered in road rash.  My phone randomly stopped working.\n\nMy boyfriend (28 years old) on the other hand, got a free trip to Australia for work, is seeing tons of his friends and going to a music festival, partying and taking drugs, got a raise at his job....and I'm SO happy for him.  We've been together and everything has been going pretty well until now. \n\nI know I am over reacting, but I'm feeling so alone in all of this shit and I feel like he's rubbing all the good things that are happening in my face. I skype with him and he's dancing around drinking beers and reading me the line up of the music festival he's going to, despite the fact that I'm saying \"Stop, ok stop...seriously...STOP\"  I spoke with him last night and I was trying really hard to be positive about everything that's happened and again he's drinking and I told him \"Hey, don't rub that in my face...I SO wish I could have a beer right now\" (Can't cause I'm on antibiotics due to the huge ass cuts I have) He said \"If you don't like it then hang up.\"  So I did.  I sms'd him...sorry but I was in a good mood and now I'm not. Have a great weekend talk to you later.   \n\nNow he's not speaking to me.", "summary": "Boyfriends life rocks, mine sucks, feels like he's shoving my face in it. Am I just being a complaining hobag?  How can I stop from hating him?"}
{"id": "t3_2n00ef", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[23/f] I slept with one of my oldest friends [22/m]...now what?", "post": "So, I've known the guy for 18 years. We have a lot of shared moments, went to the same schools, stayed in contact since leaving, have laughed, cried, been drunk, know each others'  families, know everything about each other. We have no secrets. Having gone a year or so without meeting up since he had been studying abroad, we had lunch, there was suddenly all this amazing chemistry, he was incredibly affectionate, and, long story short, we ended up having some sort of fling. This lasted a few weeks, then he decided he actually quite wanted to pursue another girl. The only reason I agreed to act on the very blatant sexual tension with him was my understanding, based on a lot of things that he had said/talked about, that this could seriously go somewhere, but timing wasn't right. I was hurt beyond belief - he was the first person I'd been intimate with since a serious sexual assault a couple of years ago, and actually, excepting that experience, only the second guy I've ever been with, which he knew about. I really felt like I could trust him. We talked, I explained all this...he is distraught and genuinely sorry for the hurt he has caused me, and I, whilst acknowledging that hurt, have made my forgiveness clear - I've known him long enough and know him well enough to know that this was not at all intentional. \n\nNow looking for advice on how to take our friendship forward. I really truly forgive him, I'm not angry or bitter - just wanting to protect my heart. I told him I needed a few days cold turkey after the conversation we had but now we are back to texting ALL THE TIME (I mean constantly, all day, every day) and I just don't know how to deal with it!", "summary": "slept with one of my oldest friends, he was a bit of a dick (unintentionally) and hurt me, neither of us want to lose the friendship. How do I take things forward healthily?"}
{"id": "t3_191028", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Comfort eating - all time low, advice/support needed", "post": "Hi everyone,\n\nI've had a really tough week and feeling at an all-time low and just need some support/advice. I am over working and studying long hours and haven't been sleeping well. My whole body is aching from sitting all day and all I have been doing in binge eating. I want to lose weight, but it's this vicious cycle I can't seem to get out of. I have tried so hard to work out and eat healthy this week, but from a lack of sleep, and stress l I seem to be failing. I find myself snacking on kitkat/biscuits/other sweets people bring at work non-stop. It's like I can't control myself. I don't remember being like this. I feel good for the few minutes I'm eating and then I feel guilty for it and promise myself I won't do it again. 10 minutes later I find myself in the kitchen thinking \"fuck it I feel awful, I deserve it.\" I feel so shitty and alone.\n\nI was talking to my boyfriend about it this morning, but he has the opposite problem. He is very very skinny and forgets to eat/not hungry and is trying to gain weight. He complains about not getting enough sleep and being sore when I sleep MUCH less than him and work out more. He is not encouraging with my workouts and doesn't even do what I do, and I'm an out of shape girl that smokes. When I told him about the binge eating he didn't say anything other than \"Have a good day at work.\" I was livid. I am so angry with him.\nSorry about the rant \u2013 really need some support PLEASE PLEAS PLEASE, have no one to talk to about this.", "summary": "Binge eating at work on sweets, over worked and feeling shitty. Boyfriend is super skinny and not encouraging.  Need support."}
{"id": "t3_478rz7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (23M) got broken up with 3 months ago by my (23F) ex girlfriend (1.5 years). Is there any way I can work things out?", "post": "She broke up with me on Thanksgiving. She said that it was the hardest thing she had ever done, and we both cried for an hour. I begged to her to reconsider, but she said she needed time to think. I haven't really given her the break she needed from the relationship until now. \n\nI have been NC for almost 2 weeks now, and I haven't heard a word from her. I miss her every single day, and I have a surgery coming up in 2 days, and I wish I could talk to her about it because I am scared to death. I really want to work on us, but obviously I need to give her the space she needs. I realized that I have a lot on myself I need to work on, but can anyone give me advice on what to do?\n\nShe is 23, very independent, likes her alone time, and doesn't talk very much. She insisted when we broke up that she wasn't doing it to be with anyone else, and that wasn't a lie from what I can tell. She told me she lost feelings for me, but insisted it happened over a 2 week period, and that doesn't seem right. She said that I was the best thing that ever happened to her, and I hope that is still true.\n\nThis might have been foolish on my part, but the day of me starting NC, I had flowers sent to her for Valentine's Day. She was very nice about it and thanked me, but I can't help but shake this feeling I made her uncomfortable. \n\nSo I am just asking for general advice on how to improve myself and improve my chances with her. Obviously, I don't want to force her to get back with me. But I do love her more than anything in the world.", "summary": "Ex broke up with me, trying to get advice on how to improve myself and improve my chances and over standing with her."}
{"id": "t3_g56y9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How would one go about making silicone sex toys?", "post": "I first saw [this] how-to on making silicone dildos, but the suggestion that one use silicone caulking seemed a bit sketchy, and a bit more searching around seemed to confirm that silicone caulking is probably not great for putting in your body. The clay model and latex mold method seems unproblematic, but I could be wrong.\n\nMore research seemed to suggest that platinum (rather than tin) cured silicone provides minimal interactions with bodily functions. One can purchase platinum-curing silicone mixes from art stores. I found a [shop] which deals with making molds/casts and has a pretty good selection of platinum-curing silicones.\n\nBut the consensus also seems to be that silicone used for sex toys should be \"medical grade\". I can't seem to figure out what that means and if it is significantly chemically different from the kind of silicone you'd get from an art store, nor where one would get small amounts of it that would be simple to mix in a \"homemade\" setting. I do know that there are a number of people who make silicone sex toys in their homes (or very small shops), but no one I've contacted is willing to divulge their methods (unsurprisingly). One person seemed to use both \"medical grade\" and \"art store\" silicone, perhaps coating the inside of a mold with the former and then filling with the latter (just a guess).", "summary": "I'm curious if anyone has any information on anything from the safety of different kinds of silicone, how handmade silicone sex toys are usually made, and good sources for appropriate kinds of silicone."}
{"id": "t3_3gck04", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [20M] confused between two girls, my current girlfriend [21F] and my bestfriend [20F]", "post": "So basically, I've been in a relationship for almost two years and it's had it's ups and downs. It started in university and since me and my girlfriend are both studying away from home, the relationship becomes long distance during summer and winter  holidays. We tend to fight a lot more during this time, for example we haven't texted for two weeks.\n\nNow my best friend, I've known for around almost 6 years but haven't spent as many of those years with her due to studying abroad. However, when I come back home for summer break or winter break, we meet up and catch up. Everyone  always told me that she's into Mr and said we should be a couple , friends family, but I never saw it and neither of us have ever brought up the topic with one another.\n\nLast winter break, I came home and my family went to meet my best friends family since they live in a different city. We ended up spending the night there and  I hadn't seen her for two years at this point. That was the first time I felt something towards her. \n\nFast foward to today, my sister's wedding was yesterday and since my best friend is also sort of a family friend, we've been meeting up alot more then usual, and my feelings for her have escalated like crazy. However I'm heading back for university in 2 weeks and I want to tell her how I feel, but I'm still in a relationship even though we haven't texted in weeks. I can't bring myself to end it over texts, and I can't bring myself to tell my best friend how I feel while being in a relationship. Also, my family is moving this year, out of country so I may not see my best friend for another couple of years, and I'm afraid if I don't say anything now, that she'll find someone else thinking that I never liked her. I'd love some advice/guidance, literally anything would help..", "summary": "In a up and down relationship, but in love with my bestfriend and not sure whether to end relationship to let my bestfriend know how I feel."}
{"id": "t3_tlhto", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Could I get some advice! I have several questions and I need all the help I can get! :)", "post": "So I've been dating a girl for about a month and we've probably made out about twice and kissed several times. We're just a couple of high school seniors.\n\nShe really likes me and thinks I'm a great guy and thinks I treat her well.\n\n1) Anyway, I'm going home for summer break for about 3 months. She said that we should keep in touch and talk to eachother and then pick up once I get back. I'm worried that she'll meet another guy while I'm gone. How could I talk to her about this and my feelings without seeming clingy and weird? I understand that we're not exclusive but she's looking for a relationship..we just need to wait until I come back.\n\n2) I'm not sure if she's ready to have sex. What kind of questions should we ask eachother so I can find out if it's something she wants to do?\n\n3) I got her on the bed while we were making out and she said her mom was on the way so we couldn't do anything. So I said \"that's fine, we'll just do it next weekend\" and she said something like \"uh, there's actually this thing I have to do all day and I'm not sure if I'll have free time\". I don't know if she's lying because she's scared to be honest or if she just wants to wait.\n\n4) I've been on four dates already. Is it too early to ask for a relationship? Should I wait to ask her to be my gf after I come back from summer break?\n\nI don't want to pressure her into doing anything she doesn't want to, but I want to make her happy. She has had several partners in the past and is experienced.", "summary": "How can I stop worrying about her fooling around with other guys while I'm gone. How can I talk to her about sex and let her know that I'm ready?"}
{"id": "t3_4stp8s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M,18] have a strange relationship with a girl [W,18]. Should I fight for her?", "post": "Hi guys,\nI had a very nice holiday together with 9 people (7 of them girls). one of them stood out. She was funny, educated and on top of that gorgeous. We had a great time together. After we got back home we kept in contact and after a few days I asked her out on a date (movie+dinner). A few hours later she responded with a text. I will try to sum it up a little:\n\nHi,\nI'm really busy at the moment. It's actually somewhat of a bad joke, but on Saturday I am on a friend's birthday. The movie you suggested isn't my type as well. Right after this I will holiday again and after I get back I'm going to start to study (quite far away). Overall I don't think we could become a couple. Sry.\n\nNow, since I don't have too much experience with texts such as this, I'd love to know what you think about this. Should I fight for her or just let her go?\n\nThanks in advance, RoooK3y", "summary": "met a really nice girl; it looked like we wqere soulmates; asked her out on a date; she replied with the second paragraph; should I fight for her or let ehr go?"}
{"id": "t3_239o9h", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my girlfriend [19 F] of two years. I can't deal with breaking up", "post": "So I was going out with a girl for almost 2 years. And recently she broke up with me. It was not an issue of anger. She claims she just fell out of love. And I really don't know how to deal with it. Angry break up with screaming yes. But when it is calm, sad goodbye. I dont know what to do. \n\nWe are trying to be friends. We knew each other for long time before and we are trying to stay friend even now. She seems she can manage. But I dont really know how. She used to fill my life. Now I don't know what to do all day. I am desperate. Every time she asks me how I am, I feel like screaming that I miss her and how bad I feel. But I cant really do that can I? I don't want to make her feel bad.\n \nEveryday I miss a person who I can tell everything to. I miss a person who held me as I was bleeding on the ground after injuring myself. Person who always came to my house with a silly plush toy when I was sick. Who helped me get through bad medical state. Who always made me feel better when I felt really bad. And I am unable to exist.\n\nI still have her photo as my wallpaper. I still feel anxiously when my friend goes to buy flowers where I once bought flowers just to get that smile. I am lost. My love went from happy and returned one to unhappy with few calm words.\n\nI am writing this here in a hope at least somebody might read it and that is all I suppose. If indeed anybody bothered to read my rambeling. Thank you. I dont know who you are but i am eternaly grateful. I am not a native english speaker so please excuse my mistakes.", "summary": "I am lost after my girlfriend left me with felling out of love as a reason. Writing this in hopes of helping me feel better. Thank you"}
{"id": "t3_1qvftm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I just need some uplifting words after my (25M) breakup.", "post": "It's been exactly 1 week since we broke up. I've kept contact down to a minimum and I blocked her on Facebook. She has tried getting back together with me and manipulating my emotions by saying how she loves me and wants us to raise a family together and blah blah blah. I've ignored her mostly. I'm trying to stay tough and keeping myself occupied with work and other nonsense. Been playing a new game for most of this week to be honest. It's mostly very enjoyable but I'm finding I don't have the attention span to play video game like I used to and it's slightly depressing. \n\nI'm resisting the urge to check up on her now as I type this. The urge will pass, I know this, but I can't help but think i may have made a mistake by leaving. Maybe it's because I'm vulnerable and lonely but I'm questioning my decision to go back to her. The relationship wasn't all bad but her constant bitching and our fighting was ridiculous. \n\nI would just like some words of encouragement or something of the like to kick my ass  in the right direction.", "summary": "Broke up with girlfriend. Trying  to stay busy. Getting depressed thinking about her. Did I make a mistake? Words of encouragement would be nice."}
{"id": "t3_qkenv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Today I left a job \"voluntarily\" after pretty much being told I was set up to fail from the moment I was hired. Reddit, what's the most frustrating thing you've ever experienced at a job, or after leaving a job?", "post": "Long story short, I completed my Masters in a communications-related field last May.  Right after school, I was hired to work in IT, even though I had no experience or knowledge of anything IT-related.  I failed to meet the expectations of the job, and today when I went in to discuss a plan of action, I was told that when I was hired, they didn't have a training plan in place to help me, nor did anyone have the time to work with me.  I said to my manager, \"so basically, I was set up to fail from the moment I was hired,\" and she agreed.  My manager offered a two-week plan to \"get back on track\" but explained that if I didn't meet the expectations, I would most likely be terminated, so I should take the severance package and leave on my own terms.  So, I voluntarily left in order to get severance, but now I don't have a job.", "summary": "Was hired to work in a field where I had no experience/knowledge.  They never trained me and didn't have time to work with me.  They asked me to resign today."}
{"id": "t3_38xkjw", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by watching softcore porn on the main TV", "post": "This didn't happen today and I wasn't aware of the internet when this happened. It was 14 years ago and I was just an innocent 10 year boy. Not really innocent. So, my family and I lived in India and we had a small house with two floors, each floor having a medium sized room and a small room. The main TV was in the first floor (in India, the second floor is called the first floor and the first floor is called the ground floor.) We had cable TV and a channel called Fashion TV piqued my interest. That channel usually had a file of pretty ladies walking down the ramp and it sometimes featured women who didn't wear any clothes on top at all. So, whenever I had a chance to watch TV alone, I would switch to that channel and hope to see something interesting. Also, something I didn't mention to you was that we had a lot of electric blackouts; everyday. Sometimes you couldn't predict the times of these blackouts but they happened everyday because of \"maintenance\" but the real reason was that there were too many people in India and we struggled to harness power for everyone. I was watching FTV one day and the power went out. We didn't have a back-up generator and I was shitting my pants. I couldn't wait there until the power came back because I was going out somewhere. When I came back my dad was watching something else on TV. He knew that I was watching Fashion TV. He came to know that I wasn't the innocent little kid he thought I was. But none of us uttered a word and an awkward silence ensued. A couple of years later, that channel was banned because Indian Government blah blah. No filter blah blah.", "summary": "Watched naked ladies on TV; Power went out. Parents came to know I was watching naked ladies when they turned on TV when power came back on. Faked Childish Innocence lost."}
{"id": "t3_1ug1tx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with my [28 M] boyfriend of 3.5 years - I'm incredibly jealous of his porn/nsfw browsing habits. JEALOUS because he'll get turned on by it then want to be intimate with me.", "post": "Not really sure what to say but I am really *jealous* I guess is the right word of bf's porn and Nsfw browsing habits. He will sometimes be in another room and open nsfw links or when I leave he browses stuff.\n\nI'm not comparing myself per se to the women and feeling bad that way, but I have an overwhelming sense of jealousy. It makes me uncomfortable knowing my bf looks at other girls and is attracted to other women. I know I should be fine with this but it makes me uncomfortable a bit, which is fine. BUT I CAN'T GET OVER IT. It's like an obessive negative obsession!\n\nhe will sometimes browse nsfw posts on reddit...when I'm around him but in another room..just looking though not fapping. But even something simple as this bugs me.\n\n**I guess its just the fact that he's getting turned on throughout the day by various other women, nsfw pics, etc. and then wanting to be intimate with me later on in the day or he'll just grope me later on....but it makes me feel negative and i'm jealous and I get kind of mad sometimes.**\n\nHow do I get over this. It's like a negative obsession I have. :(", "summary": "how do i get over bfs nsfw browsing/porn habits. i'm jealous and feel uncomfortable - he gets turned on by various women and it bugs me."}
{"id": "t3_3z43pm", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Need help finding a new direction in life. Can't pursue life plan after accident.", "post": "Hey /r/advice. I'm having some life problems, and need some guidance.\n\nI feel like I'm stuck in a shitty situation. 5 years ago I broke my right arm and as a result lost my job. Due to complications, I can no longer use it for load bearing tasks like poring milk, lifting items, and driving. Last year I was diagnosed with Osteochondritis dissecans (floating chips of bone in the knee). Luckily it's in my left knee, which allows me to use a cane in my \"good\" hand to walk. Unfortunately, I can't afford the surgery to correct it. I like to think of myself as smart, however I have dysgraphia. I have a typing speed of about 5 words a minute with 30% accuracy. I have taken computer typing classes but have not improved. I have contacted State and federal disability for help and they have stated that \"None of my problems are severe enough to warrant disability\". So, I'm officially not disabled. I just can't use my arms whilst standing and I can't use a computer effectively when sitting. I'm trained in construction and auto maintenance. What should I do for work? What's my next step? I'm living off savings and food stamps.", "summary": "Can't find work that doesn't involve arms. Can't drive. Can't physically support myself. How do I financially support myself?"}
{"id": "t3_3iz9qn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [18/M] too stubborn to let go", "post": "*I really need therapy. Something's wrong with me.*\n\n\u00a0\n\nSo a year after the break up, I'm still trying to find excuses to talk to my ex [18/F], even though she already told me she feels uncomfortable about it. The most recent example is asking her to draw on my newly-bought phone casing because there are stains on it (she's quite an amazing artist btw).\n\n\u00a0\n\n# \\*insert facepalm here\\*\n\n\u00a0\n\nThe f\\*\\*k is wrong with me? Am I too obsessed with her? Am I just f\\*\\*king horny (especially at this age)? WHY DO I NEED HER SO BADLY?!\n\n\u00a0\n\n> #### Quick summary of the relationship:\n> \n> Started off as friend, then to best friends, then to a couple. No major issues with each other. Lasted for about 10 months. Broke up due to disapproval from her parents.\n\n\u00a0\n\nA few people around me really did suggest that I seek therapy. I would love to, except I'm not exactly oozing out money to be able to afford the fee. I've tried distracting myself. I've attended special programmes where we work on projects similar to the ones in the industry. I've started a ton of projects. My life is MUCH busier than during the relationship.\n\n\u00a0\n\nHelp, /r/relationship?", "summary": "Trying to at the very least communicate with my ex even when she's feeling uncomfortable. Not sure what's wrong with me."}
{"id": "t3_2xahcy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24 M] recently got back together with my GF [25 F] but it is not the same, and it is not easy.", "post": "After a painful month apart, I went to her house and got her back.  This was a few days ago.  We talked for a long time, both of us talked about our grievances, and also what we had wanted out of the relationship to begin with.  I found myself apologizing for everything that I had failed at.  She did less apologizing, to the extent that I worry that she doesn't believe she did anything wrong in the relationship or that I had no reason to doubt her.  \n\nSince then, I initiate most of our meeting, texts and everything.  She no longer seeks me out as she did before.  When we talk about things that caused the split, she gets mad and I find myself apologizing for wanting to see her.\n\nShe doesn't have many friends, and during the time we were apart she became more active in a college club.  Now its where she would rather be.  Any time I talk to her, that's what she brings up, like every time.  I understand she needs to be more involved, but this is a weird time to be hiding out.\n\nI don't know if I'm just overcompensating because the breakup/reconciliation is so recent or if I'm just fooling myself and don't really have much of a relationship.  I really just want her to meet me half-way here.  I don't want to over-react to anything but I also won't eat shit either.", "summary": "My girlfriend and I got back to together after a painful split.  We still are extremely on edge and it is difficult to see ahead."}
{"id": "t3_2bdf8w", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "This girl (24f) wants to hang out with me (25m), but she feels uncomfortable with herself. Is there a way I can comfort or better understand her?", "post": "I met someone (unfortunately online) who seems really cool.  Someone who makes me laugh and someone I really look forward to talking to.  We started Skyping each other.  Unfortunately, she lives about 3 hours inland from me, which requires a decent amount of planning to hang out.  She has expressed interest in hanging out, but whenever I bring up plans she gets iffy.  Just the other night though I laid everything out that we could do one afternoon x, x, and x and that we would have a lot of fun.  Also that I am not coming to hook up with her.\n\nShe just kept saying that she feels weird about meeting me as opposed to other guys closer by (who she admittedly has not had a great track record with).  Mentioned that she feels dirty meeting all these guys (she has had 8 other dates, but hasn't really skyped or befriended them as much as she has me) -- like a whore.  I asked her if she wasn't comfortable with me (which is ok) but she said I was fine and that she just feels like she isn't as fun of a person to hang out with in person. \n\nAfter insisting that we would have fun and that I can go home any time, she changed her mind and said we could give it a try. So we set up a day and I was going to call her the day before just to make sure she was still completely ok.  I don't know what gives though or what to say when she gets pessimistic about that.  She specifically said \"I want to hang out with you but I just don't know\"  Maybe she is nervous about what would happen?", "summary": "Girl nervous about meeting me and claims that she feels uneasy with her self or track record with guys or something.  I just don't know what it is or how to comfort her."}
{"id": "t3_ffb6f", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can a girl tell you she loves you and still date somebody else? Time for a story.", "post": "So I was meaning to get this off my chest for a while, here it goes.\n\nIn December 2009, I started talking to this girl I met online. I didn't think anything of it, and all we did was just talk online, or text. Soon after, she called me on the phone, and we became pretty serious. She is an amazing person with an addictive personality after talking countless hours with her. The problem? She is 35 with 2 kids and I'm 21 studying to become an Accountant. For the longest time we both wanted a relationship so badly, but I told myself it would never work because we are both in 2 completely different stages of our life. I wanted kids and she already had kids. So after fighting her desire for a relationship, we became best friends, and we are both extremely happy.\n\nShe broke up with her ex boyfriend (who is around my age), and after a year and half, they recently got back together. I feel a little be crappy about it, but I keep reminding myself that I was the one who didn't want a relationship. She is forever grateful that I came into her life, and says I was the best thing to ever happen to her life. She had a dark time where she fell into depression and she tells me that I am the reason for her getting out of that depression period.\n\nEven after she got back with her ex, she still tells me she loves me, and will forever do so because of all the things I helped her with to get rid of her depression. She goes on further by saying that given the opportunity, she would spend the rest of her life with me because she knew I was the one. I feel the same way. You may call me an idiot for thinking that way, but it's how I feel, i'm entitled to have my heart express the feelings I have for this girl.\n\nAnyways, how would you feel if the girl you were dating was just dating you because the guy she really wanted told her it could never happen?", "summary": "I'm 21, she is 35. She got back with her ex, and tells me she still loves me. Given the opportunity, she would spend the rest of her life with me, but I told her it could never happen."}
{"id": "t3_4ci82m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [18F] of 6 months, I'm losing interest and everything she does annoys me", "post": "First of all, this is mainly due to us using Facebook messenger, when she's visiting it's normally alright, although we do have bored moments. \n\nAt the start of our relationship, everything was fun, and interesting. I stayed up until late with her, just talking. Recently, I've found it a chore to talk to her, maybe because I feel like I have to, maybe because we don't have anything to say. She's been getting upset over this, and I don't want to lose her, although I get annoyed and stressed. It feels like she talks about nonsensical horseshit, and I have to answer. First of all its rice, then chocolate, then imaginary Internet points on imgur. \n\nI'm not sure if this is the root cause of this, but I've been feeling like this towards other people, definitely with a disinterest in online chats, and I've been snapping at people a lot. My mood swings often, mainly at night, when most of our Facebook conversations happen. During the day I hardly speak to her, and I like it that way.\n\nTo summarise, I'm not sure if it's her, or me, or the constant talking online, as I hardly spoke to people online before we got together. She's madly in love with me, and I'm always annoyed and yelling at her, somehow,  she thinks she's doing something wrong, even though I know deep down she isn't. \n\nWe've got a holiday booked in July, and I don't know if it'll last, I know I need to put some work in but I don't know how. I'm an impatient arse of a person.", "summary": "losing interest in my girlfriend, and I don't know if it's a mental health problem or its her. Also don't know about the future of the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_gcqg5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My husband refuses to help himself. Is there any hope at all?", "post": "My husband (26) and I (22) have been married for 2 years now and I'm starting to regret it (which is a thought I really don't want to be having).  On average, I'd say we fight about 4 times a week.\n\nThe minimum wage job he's at now makes him miserable, which he takes out on me by either shouting or ignoring me all night.  I set up an online CV for him so he can find a new job, but he refuses to even look at it. If it isn't coaching, he's not interested.  Problem is, he's out of shape and has no experience in the field (unless you count playing NCAA/Madden obsessively...).\n\nLast summer, he told everyone that he had gotten a coaching job when he had only briefly spoken to the employer. I had suggested he keep it to himself until he had the job in writing, but he completely ignored that. Obviously, he didn't get the job and the fallout was very awkward, to say the least. He also got even more depressed and we fought every night, without fail, for weeks.\n\nThis year, I decided to get involved and encouraged him to come running with me. He didn't want to - said he didn't have time - and spends all night playing games or watching TV instead. He did buy one of those fitness programs, but only used it for about a week before giving up.\n\nI love him, but I can't take much more of his laziness.\nAs a brief example, which is pretty typical behavior - I went abroad for 6 months, leaving him alone with our new puppy. I came back to find he had moved our entire living room into the bedroom, shut himself in there and not taken the puppy outside at all. Our carpet is completely ruined, as you can imagine, and the puppy has a lot of issues due to the neglect.\n\nI really don't know what to do and walking out isn't an option right now.", "summary": "My husband is lazy, fixated on an unrealistic job, won't do anything to help himself and is making me miserable too. Is there anything I can do to save this marriage before it's too late?"}
{"id": "t3_2s8l20", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[14/F] Kind of a loner in class, need friendship/social advice", "post": "Last year, I entered a pretty selective school in which only a certain number of people can enter the school each year, so in every grade there isn't many people. I'm in my second year, and the class I was put in just happened to contain absolutely nobody I knew, while everybody else knew each other. On the second day, I noticed some other people who didn't seem to belong with everyone else; in a desperate attempt to not be alone, I blurted out, \"Hey, My name is BlackLotus770, want to be friends?\" which I immediately regretted. \n\nSo being an awesome person, she didn't mind that I had asked her like a kindergartner, and so everyday in class we sat next to each other and I discovered that she was a very awesome person indeed. However, I couldn't really keep up conversations with her and we didn't have all too much in common, and we slowly drifted away. She formed a group with some other people in the class, and doesn't really talk with me very often anymore. I mean, she does, but really only the typical \"hey\"s and \"how's it going\"s. \n\nSo now I'm all alone. In classes where I used to sit next to her, I now awkwardly join another group as my seat was taken by somebody else. I have friends outside of class, but during classes I just feel so awkward, especially if we have to get into groups. \n\nShe's an awesome person, and I don't want to latch onto her as she obviously likes being in the company of her group and not me, but I also don't want to be alone. I don't really know if I can call anyone in my class a friend, but I'm on friendly terms with everyone. I can't help but feel a bit lonely, though. Is there anything I can do? I'm the quiet and awkward one in class, but I'm trying to improve socially. And yes I know I'm young, but help would be appreciated.", "summary": "Quiet and awkward gurl gets friend, friend drifts away and gets new friends, lonely now but doesn't want to be clingy. Have friends outside of class, this is only in travel class."}
{"id": "t3_32b30h", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "In 20+ years my wife has been in one car accident and had one speeding ticket. Her driving scares the shit out of me.", "post": "My wife does the bulk of the driving and there's nothing I can do about it.  I have epilepsy and even though my driving record is just as good as hers, it's just safer for everyone that I don't drive.  That goes double for when my kids are in the car.  She regularly goes 20 mph over the speed limit, will swerve through three lanes just to get ahead of one car, and then rides the bumper of the next car in line.  When the light turns green she either takes off like it's a drag race or doesn't notice the light has changed until someone honks.  When a light turns red she accelerates until she is forced to slam on the brakes.  When I drive the SUV I get about 22 mpg.  When she drives she gets about 16 mpg.  \n\nWe've fought about this more times than I can count and she always calms down for a month or two.  Then she inevitably goes back to driving like she's sponsored by Marlboro.  The biggest problem I'm facing, and the reason I'm never going to win this fight (other than that she's my wife) is that she always knows exactly where everyone else is on the road.  She has perfect spatial awareness.  I'm at a loss as to what to do and need some new arguments to get her to slow down.  It's one thing to drive so aggressively in L.A. where that's the norm, but we've moved to a place where the only traffic we ever see is for local sports and church.", "summary": "My wife is excellent at driving in the city but scares the shit out of me now that we're out in the boonies."}
{"id": "t3_3rqyex", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (20M) am confused about what to do with my relationship with my ex-girlfriend(19F) of four years", "post": "Okay may not be as exciting as other posts on here but I am really confused about what to do:\n\nWe have been together for four years and had a lot of difficult patches which has ended in multiple breakups.  During one of these break ups she slept with a friend from home, she explained that she was just moving on and never expected to see me again and it didn't mean anything. I believe her and moved on\n\nAs of last year I started really suffering from depression and it made our relationship very difficult. We eventually broke up before both going back to university in the same city! She was a fresher and has slept with somebody else.  I have talked to other girls and dated since but not had any sexual encounters.  \n\nWe recently started talking and it is coming more apparent to us, especially me that we do still love each other and joked a lot about how stupid we are when we keep breaking up (probably 3 break ups lasting over a month in last 3 years). I love her and want to be with her but I am scared if things change I'll have missed on the whole sleeping with other people and that i should play the field - but to be honest I don't want to be with somebody else.\n\nThings are looking more and more likely we are going to get back together and even though I want it to happen I am so scared that it'll backfire and I'll leave myself in a terrible position in the future.\n\nI love her to bits and probably would end up having children with her in the future if we do get back together. Am I being shallow?", "summary": "ex-girlfriend has slept with others since our breakup where she is still my first and only, we want to get back together. Good idea?"}
{"id": "t3_mun3v", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I build credit while avidly living within my means?", "post": "Currently, I only have one source that will add to my credit score which would be my student loans. I live within my means as best I can, I drive a beater ('93 honda) that I paid cash for, I dont buy many games(League of legends + <$15 steam sale games), I dont have a large wardrobe, my only 'luxury' item is my gaming computer which I put together myself for less than 1k, I go out to eat maybe once a week with a group of friends.\n\nI dont have a credit card, strictly debit card. I'm really just wondering how I can build a credit rating for when I want to buy a house when I already have financial responsibility and save before buying something and knowing what I can/cant afford.", "summary": "I dont want to waste money/risk a lapse of judgement with credit card by buying any big ticket or $5ing myself everyday for meals. What is an effective way of building my credit?"}
{"id": "t3_2aupnt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My Girlfriend [24F] of 5 and a half years is breaking up with me [24M] apparently it's not me it's her.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for a long time and have lived together for about 3 and a half years. A month ago she wanted to break up after I caught her lying about deleting texts etc. She has cheated on me once by just kissing another guy while drunk but I know she is not deleting \"cheating txts\" as I have seen them before she has deleted them before.\n\n Now tongiht everything happened exactly the same. She was found to be deleting txts from the same guy. I am 100% sure she is not cheating on him with me but I can't help but feel she is complaining about me to him or something. Anyway I don't think that's the point. \n\nWe are best friends she says she still loves me and wants to be with me down the track and we will get married have kids etc. But I can't handle that. Once she is gone I cannot bear to think of her with anyone else. She has a lot of friends but most of my friends I have met through friends of hers and my school friends live a few hours away. \n\nShe is saying she just wants to be alone and has found herself developing crushes and finding other people attractive. I am absolutely wrecked and really scared about my motivation and financial situation if she leaves. I love her so much I don't know what to do. I made a throwaway account because I get pretty embarrassed to talk about my relationship with anyone else but her.", "summary": "girlfriend of 5 years is breaking up with me. I don't know what to do. She want's to be togerther down the track but I cant do it thinking about whoever else she has been with throughout our time apart."}
{"id": "t3_167whh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I 18 (m) don't know if i should stay in relationship with my girlfriend 18 (f)", "post": "So let me start somewhat from the beginning, me and her had met back in middle school when we were 13. We had become each others first girlfriend/boyfriend, gave each other our first kiss to our first fuck. Everything went well until we entered highschool where i had started to smoke trees, because of this she broke up with me and we went on a 4-5 month break where we would somewhat still keep in contact. During this time i had come to realize that i am bi sexual. We had got back together and these feelings became suppressed as i was happy to be back with her. The rest of high school was good up until after graduation where we decided to take a break during the summer. During this summer i had come to realize that i am more attracted to men to girls. I have not told anyone but here that i am gay now and dont plan on telling anyone else. I had only told her because i had grown up with her and she knows me best in my life as i know her best in her life.\n\nNow the problem that i see is that i am a gay man in a relationship with a girl. Now dont get me wrong, i love her to death and would never wanna loose her as she is my best friend and most important person in my life. The hard part is having to suppress my true sexual attractions, but also, pretend that i am attracted to her.  I have tried to ask if we could just be friends but she tells me that she cant just be my friend and that its either were together or not. i can understand this because she is deeply in love and attracted to me and would not be able to be by my side if i am not with her as a boyfriend. I am afraid that i will cheat on her and just hurt her which brings me to the question....WTF should i do? i cant stand the thought of loosing her in my life....", "summary": "gay man in a straight relationship, cant breakup with her because that means i loose her for the rest of my life and she is too important to me"}
{"id": "t3_2ccsfx", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend give me ultimatum f25, m29. One year", "post": "Background: \n\nI am from a rural town in mexico where old traditions are still a rule. my parents believe in dating = just talking never kissing, holding hand or anything. Is difficult for them to understand that I am dating someone from US, and often get in arguments with them about it. I cannot imaging if they found out that I am sleeping over at his house. \n\nNow my boyfriend got mad see background please. He called me coward, but I do not know what to do. I cannot tell my parents. I do not want to be dishonest, is just that they will not understand. :( . I am just going to cause an argument with them of not ending, just to give you an idea my grandpa only advice to me was \"if you lose you virginity before marriage you are worthless, so be careful\" how can I deal with this!!! \n\nIt took me years to do not feel guilty myself, and now my boyfriend who I love very much is thinking of breaking up with me. I am dying.", "summary": "I do not know how to deal with Mexican traditional family and my boyfriend no accepting my \"hiding\" (sleeping over at his house)."}
{"id": "t3_3s35vb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girl[19/f] I like just broke up. What should I[19/m] do?", "post": "So i have known this girl for about 3 months now. I had no idea that she had a boyfriend until yesterday when I overheard her friends talking about it. All these time she never hinted or said she was in a relationship. She is now pretty heartbroken. Like really really heartbroken. I heard it they did not work out at all but she's still deeply in love with him. I have not talked to her since they broke up, we always do before that. Now, I am also unsure if she knows the fact that I know what is going on (that she broke up and had a boyfriend).\nMy relationship with her got pretty close after a month knowing her. We almost have lunch and dinner 3-5 times a week. She always gives mixed signals to me to i am very 50/50 about her towards me. Really, I would never thought she had a boyfriend. She always said he was a friend. They probably only meet up like once a fortnight. Now, should i give her time to let her cool down from all these emotions? I shouldn't comfort her or anything right? What is the next step? :(", "summary": "Girl I like just broke up. I din't know she had a boyfriend during the 3 months i knew her. She gives mixed signals before breakup. What should i do?"}
{"id": "t3_1urbd4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "MyGF [27/f] and I [26/f] have been happily dating for 3 months, until last week when she decided to criticize EVERYTHING I do...", "post": "MY GF and I met and started dating exclusively 3 months ago. We're very happy, always laughing, lots in common, similar life goals... \n\nBut starting about a week and a half ago, we cannot go a whole day without her criticizing SOMETHING about my career (I'm a successful freelancer, but she resents that I have so much time off between my gigs), my mannerisms, my habits. EVERYDAY. literally. I don't fight with her about it, and let her vent her frustrations about me (I always welcome honesty), but it seems to be getting worse.\n\nToday, when I confronted her about her frequent nit picking and why she suddenly insisted on doing it so often, and how it affects me, she said that \" It just annoys her, and wants to make me aware of it, because it will never change if she doesn't tell me\".\n\nI suppose I just don't really know how to feel about this. She seems resentful and frustrated all the time recently, and is insisting I alter several of my harmless (seriously, harmless) habits and mannerisms( i.e. \"I eat too fast\" \"I exaggerate too much\" \"I don't put the dishes in the dishwasher in an organized-enough fashion\" ). \n\nI'm happy to compromise for relationships, but is this crossing the line? I have never put any expectations like this on her, ever. I'm worried it's connected to a deeper problem.", "summary": "GF is asking me to change a lot of things, which I'm happy to do, but I don't know if it's crossing the line or just asking for more demands."}
{"id": "t3_30q6dr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21M] fell hard for [18F].", "post": "I basically love the stupid fucking girl. I've had girlfriends in the past and some casual shit, but have never truly cared for any of those girls and she's the only one good enough to get me emotionally invested and now I feel like a big fucking pussy about it and act like one too.\n\nWe're both military she adored me, I adored her back but knew orders would eventually seperate us. So she was my girlfriend for a few months and she's heart melting and beautiful and all that annoying shit, but she has some skeletons and problems of her own which is cool because she's still the best.\n\n She likes me so much that she insists I be her boyfriend over the distance which is like 3 gazillion miles. So we're eventually seperated (fuck you military stop giving me good people and taking them away) and I get all nervous and paranoid because of course the only girl I ever fucking care about is now not with me and I eventually get all annoying about her friends because they're all guys because she's military. It was my first long distance thing because before that I was like \"lol why would I wait for some dumb girl\" and then she comes into my life and I'm like oh I understand why people fall in love now and do stupid things because of it.\n\nSo she is becoming more distant and some more awful shit happens in her life when she's goes home. She's tough but has her own way of handling things which is to not communicate with anyone and this makes me frustrated because I can't stand not talking to her.\n\nShe eventually says that it won't work over the phone and I'm like wtf you dumb perfect girl you wanted this to happen. So I've been trying not to talk to her and delete her from social media but I still end up texting her and saying stupid shit especially when I'm drunk. She probably hates me now and I accused her of just using me because I checked her Facebook from my buddies account and what do you fucking know? It says in a relationship.", "summary": "Me and girl really like each other. She drops me for long distance even though she wanted a long distance relationship and now probably has a new boyfriend already. Should I even try?"}
{"id": "t3_gnzc9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Fake Girl, Real Girl??", "post": "So here's my situation. I love www.omegle.com, it's a great site to have some good conversations and meet some awesome people. About a week ago, I was on said site, and I met this girl. Named Sammie. We had a really good conversation. And I asked her to email me, she responded by telling me to add her on facebook. I though (what have I got to lose?) \n\nSo I did. Holy Gorgeous Reddit.\n\nWell I've talked to her quite a lot, and I actually really like her. However I have a nagging suspicion that all is not as she says it is... She has 130 someodd friends, the majority of which have <9 friends!! She doesn't have a single friend from her hometown. All of her friend's posts on her wall are exactly the same. They use the same format, all have little quirks that hint to me that they are all the same person!!! \n\nNow this is all well and good, I could simply ask her for a phone number, or an address, and confirm my suspicions. But I'm better than that =) Luckily I'm a programmer.\n\nSo here's what I'm thinking. Simple detective program to discover her identity.\n\nIf she isn't who she says she is, I'd still like to talk to her, I just don't want to be lied to, you know?", "summary": "Met a girl online, I think she's fake, should I do a little advanced detective work and find out?  "}
{"id": "t3_140x1b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [37] am trying to deal with my very narcissistic father [64].", "post": "How do I deal with my father's retaliatory BS? The details are below.\n\nWe've been estranged for over 3 years now - I disengaged to distance myself from him, due to two decades of his alcoholic behavior and emotional abuse that was directed toward me. I tried setting some boundaries, and his responses were late-night phone calls that made me feel harassed and threatened.\n\nI'm trying to give him what he wants - a relationship. But I am also making clear that any relationship will be on my terms, and that boundaries must be respected. I expressed this in a recent email - I won't talk to him on the phone because he gets immediately verbose and nasty when I suggest he did something that hurt me, or I assert myself - in his world, everyone he has a relationship with must act like they are his subordinate.\n\nI'm getting massive pushback via email. It's like he didn't even read where I stated that his behavior hurt my feelings and made me feel harrassed. Instead, I get a lot of \"well you did [x] to me and it hurt MY feelings! How could you do that to ME?\" \n\nI admit I've made a lot of mistakes with my father, I've said a lot of things out of anger, but he's had many years to bring these things up with me - he chooses to bring them up when I say how hurt I feel by his treatment, as if \"well you did it too\" somehow justifies everything.\n\nI know his responses are petty bullshit. Retaliatory. Makes me feel manipulated. But I'm not sure how to respond. I *DO* want to apologize for some of the things I've said in anger, but if I do, he goes into \"you screwed up and now you're going to lick my boots...see everybody screws up....let's forgive and forget\" mode, and I end up right where I began, not getting any acknowledgement about MY hurt feelings.\n\nHow do I respond to this? I feel like I'm in a lose-lose situation. I know I cannot change him, but being completely estranged is very painful.", "summary": "my dad saves up my transgressions against him, and when I express my feelings, he immediately unloads them on me - what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_xvk3c", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what's the most painful/embarrassing \"I immediately regret this decision\" moment you have ever had? I'll start.", "post": "One time, I was hanging out with my friend, we'll call him DJ, my brother \"Brock\", and our family friend \"Kurt.\" We went to the Mc Donald's connected to a BP in our small town and got large soft drinks, then afterwards we decided to go across the street, and down this steep hill to the lake our town sits on. About halfway down this steep-ass hill there was a pot hole. Brock and Kurt went over it with ease, and DJ wanted me to go first. So I thought, being the genius I am, that I could jump the pot hole and sprint down the hill. I would clear the hole and get to the bottom faster. Two birds, one stone right? Wrong-o. \"DJ, hold my drink!\" I said, then I jumped the hole, started sprinting. Now, I think it is important that I mention that I am no stranger to food, I am a heavy set guy. This being said, I realized shit got too real, too fast. I fanatically looked for a way to slow down, and noticed a small tree in front of me... I steam rolled over that like it was a rolling pin going over play-doe. Adding insult to injury, I somehow swallowed a spider that was using the tree as shelter. I then made it to the bottom... on my face. Right into the jagged rocks at the bottom. I rolled right across them. I basically cried and laughed at the same time. Then DJ came down and I said \"DJ, dude.\" and he replied \"Uhhh... yeah?\" I said \"You still have my drink?\" He replied \"Yeah dude.\" \"Gimmie that, I swallowed a spider and its in my throat.\" I said. I took a drink to force the bitch down, and tried to at least go out like a spider eating boss. So ends a perfect day...", "summary": "Tried to jump a pot hole then sprint down a steep hill, steam rolled a tree, then took my drink from my friend to help swallow a spider from the tree that was in my throat somehow.***"}
{"id": "t3_1979h5", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "I (18m) am still in love with my ex (19f), though she seems to have moved on.", "post": "I (18M) was with her(19F) for two years, and was her first everything. Kiss, sex, etc. We argued a decent amount and it was semi-long distance for most of it, but it was generally really pleasant and we seemed pretty good for eachother. About a year into it, she met a guy online in like a \"searching for friends\" thread somewhere. He ended up being a pretty regular fighting point, because I constantly felt like she prioritized him over me. Anyway, this continues for a year, she gets kicked out of her house and I help her find a new place and job in my town. With her work and how busy she was, she started prioritizing a lot of things over me, but still kept talking to the guy. In addition, she had said she was curious about being with someone else, though she took this back pretty soon after saying it despite me telling her I understood and wasn' angry. So this goes on for awhile, and then in December after not having seen each other for two weeks I go to her place and help her unpack and move some things and after about 30 minutes she makes it really clear she wants me to leave, and I do. She refuses to talk to me about it at all, and in my hurt and frustration I break up with her and tell her she acts like she outgrew me, and she says this is true. I feel alright for a bit, talk to her as a friend pretty frequently. Then recently I find out that 1-2 weeks after our break up, she started a long distance relationship with the guy. I didn't exactly take this well, been just going to school/work and drinking when I get home every day for about a week. I feel like I shouldn't still want her because of how little it seems like it meant to her, but I can't really help it. I want to do something for her for her birthday this weekend and I know she would like it, partly for closure and partly as a last ditch effort to make her love me again. Advice?", "summary": "I recently broke up with my girlfriend of two years, and she is now with a guy I absolutely hate who we fought about while together. Not sure what to do."}
{"id": "t3_3jkf1f", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23F] have a lot of unfounded anxiety about my relationship with my partner [25M], hoping to find some reassurance", "post": "PSA: i suffer from mental illness, including extreme anxiety and panic disorder, so please try to be gentle.\n\ni have a lot of insecurity when it comes to my long distance relationship. fortunately for me, cheating is not one of the things i worry about. however, he and i haven't seen each other in about six weeks. this is my first ldr, and i'm trying to keep in mind that he's not avoiding seeing me and that this is just the nature of a long distance relationship. we have tentative plans for next weekend but he hasn't confirmed yet and it's been the source of a lot of anxiety for me.\n\ntoday i kind of took that out on him, telling him i was afraid that he was embarrassed of me or stringing me along, and asking him to explain to me why he couldn't commit to our plans yet and telling him it was the only way i could calm down. i sent him a lot of panicked texts and it was kind of intense. \n\ni have since calmed down, and we talked briefly, and i'm just trying to gauge how angry he is with me right now. when he got back to me he texted me \"woah, holy shit, what did i just walk back into\" but then after that he told me that he hasn't committed yet is only because he doesn't know exactly what is going on yet for next weekend and he's uncomfortable finalizing everything if he doesn't have a solid plan.\n\ni'm very anxious about the status of our relationship right now. to me it seems like he's definitely a little angry, but i don't think he would have tried to reassure me like he did if he was thinking of breaking up with me or something like that. is that a reasonable conclusion? how can i better handle things like this in the future?", "summary": "lots of relationship anxiety when it comes to my ldr, not sure how to manage it or how to be more sure of myself"}
{"id": "t3_35ulh9", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Babysitter negligence.. Criminal?", "post": "I have two small children, ages 2.5 years (Liam) and 7 months (Emma). I have a big problem. There was a death in my family and I had to travel several hundred miles because of this with very little notice. Long story short, I ended up leaving my kids with my trusted sitter (we'll call her \"Mary\") for the ~48 hours I had to be away. I felt like that was best for them under the circumstances, but it turns out I was very wrong. Shortly after I had picked up my children, I come to find out that Mary had apparently managed to enjoy a date night while my kids were in her care. The only thing I know for a fact is that she left my kids for at least an hour (probably longer). I don't know where she left them. I don't know with whom she left them. I also have no evidence against her, other than the word of a friend and a Facebook post. Additionally, Liam was extremely hungry and thirsty, and they were both incredibly exhausted. I am not exaggerating when I say that I am very concerned that they had not eaten or slept even remotely enough since I dropped them off. \nObviously, I feel like this is totally unacceptable, if not criminal!! I don't know what to do and I am very upset! I need advice. Is there really nothing that I can do from a legal standpoint? Also, if I spread the word about her negligence, could that hurt me down the road? Defamation or something? I feel strongly that I cannot just let this go! Please note that Mary has watched my kids at least a dozen times, and I've been completely satisfied with their care up until now. Needless to say, I will never consider leaving my kids with her again. I am located in North Carolina, United States. \nSorry for the novel. If there is a more appropriate sub for this, please let me know if I'm in the wrong place. Thank you guys in advance.", "summary": "My sitter left my kids after I trusted her to keep them while I was out of town. What, if anything, can/should I do? Also, what should I avoid doing? "}
{"id": "t3_26ji7u", "subreddit": "self", "title": "To ignore", "post": "Today I realize something, I am ignored almost all the time, specially by women. It is not something new, I knew that, you talk to someone, and you never get an answer, or she only answer with monosyllable until you stop by boring. But as I told you, this is not the one thing I discover today. \n\nI guess than from their perspective is something like that: He only wants to fuck me, I am not interested in him, I have better candidates (I am not perfect as most of us, in my case I am not ugly but I need to lose 12kg) and I don't need a new friend so better to ignore him.\n\nAs I really hate being ignored, without realizing, I completely stop to talk to girls, and in the last 5 month I almost hadn't talked to anyone.\n\nAnd this happen, a girl surprisingly makes up her mind to talk to me without any apparent reason, except that automatically I have assumed (as they assume men wanna fuck to every women they talk) that she is going to ask me something. Unconsciously I began to answer using only monosyllables and after 3 minutes she was asking something to me.\n\nI reject it, she was a little surprised I didn't accepted and after she insisted one more time I have answered that she wasn't interested really in how I am, or what I am doing right now, that she hasn't talked to me in months and that I have better things to do that spend my time helping someone that has ignored me all the time.\n\nShe didn't know how to answer and I left so,", "summary": "You can ignore girls than only talk to you because she want the **F** *(avour)*. And katorce recommends you to do so."}
{"id": "t3_31y1u5", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Kansas. Guy seeking damages for a car accident in a shady way.", "post": "Hi.  First off, I've already made an appointment with a lawyer but I figured as much information as possible couldnt hurt.\n\nIn february, I rear-ended a car after skidding on water.  The car accident was pretty minimal honestly (my airbags didn't deploy/car function fine/only cosmetic damage).  A cop was called and took accounts and photos.  The guy seemed irritated but not hurt in the least.  I gave him/the police my insurance and contact information.  As far as I knew he took care of it and I hadn't heard from him.\n\nApparently, the cop miswrote my cell number (making a 1 look like a 7) and the guy had been trying to contact me.  I found out my insurance policy that had been in effect was cancelled due to lack of payment (I was on my parents insurance and I was unaware they hadn't paid/they did not inform me).  I got my own insurance asap but I found out I was basically boned because I technically didn't have insurance during the time the accident occurred.\n\nThis morning I received a manila envelope on my car windshield addressed to me.  In it, the guy wrote me a letter describing his attempts to contact me.  Additionally, he included a large amount of my information he could find online (facebook photos, employee page, white pages info, etc.).  He also included the incident report and two quotes for repairs to his damages.  He's seeking me to pay him in a cash order for the full repair of his car or he will seek more, including damages for \"whiplash and a concussion\" although as far as I can tell he has no proof of either.  Basically, what is my best option here.\n\nAlso, while I know he had active insurance, am I responsible for the full amount or for whatever the deductible would be?", "summary": "I rear ended a guy, discovered my insurance had expired without my knowledge.  Months later he's seeking money for damages in form of a cash order for full repair of his vehicle."}
{"id": "t3_mfpnb", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Workers of reddit, are you a slacker or a hard-worker?", "post": "Just interested how common it is to have jobs where you can literally do nothing all day, nada. I'm not saying everyday but where the average workload is 50% or less than the time you have at work and where you can literally spend a day doing nothing if you decided on it.\n\nAlso interested in how many of you can say you actually get worked off your asses and have too much work compared with time?\n\nRealize posting this on reddit probably means I'm more likely to get the slackers...", "summary": "Slacker or hard worker, let me know what you are and what you do, can you do nothing all day and get away with it? Or do you never see the light of the internet at work for fear of being fired?"}
{"id": "t3_15xml5", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Previous job end date (termination) was not mentioned in interview- my fault.  Am I screwed?", "post": "Throwaway here. To give a little back story, November 27 I was terminated from my job.  The reasons were something similar to \"this isn't working out\" \"We've had some attendance issues\" and a few other various things seem to be thrown in there.  The main reason I was probably fired was due to (*speculation*) not working overtime and lack of work coming up.    \n  \nShort version:  I requested PTO and was approved before thanksgiving, I was told to work 10-6 the sat and sun before thanksgiving week.  I had previously worked both weekends, along with my 40hr weeks, and this time I told them no, I already had plans and requested thanksgiving week off.  Tuesday after thanksgiving week I was fired.  I was told it was my last day but I would be kept on payroll and be compensated through Dec 31, and so technically I was still employed.\n\nAfter that point I spent my time job searching.  I applied to a job on the 17th which I was contacted about on Jan 2, the company recruiter passed my info along to the hiring manager and they decided they wanted to interview me today.  I completely forgot I had not updated my resume and nothing ever came up about \"current\" job or \"do you still work here\" so I never really had a chance to insert it and honestly I was so focused on making a good impression and what I could bring to the company it passed my mind.\n\nSo I choose to follow up with an email a few hours later because my gf asked if they asked about being fired and I had already worked up how I would discuss it. I felt like a complete dumbass for excluding it.  The email was an interview thank you follow up and I inserted a paragraph about them not having an updated resume and I did not want to misrepresent myself and my employment ended Dec 31. If they had questions to contact me.  Was this bad or am I completely screwed either way? I really liked the job and I'm now just down about it and rambling...", "summary": "Never updated my resume and forgot about giving them and updated resume with my then current job terminated. Say goodbye to that job opportunity?"}
{"id": "t3_1f0ja5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "21M isn't sure of poor communication is his fault or hers 21F, needs advice", "post": "Me (21M) and my GF (21F) have been dating for almost 2.5 years. Things have been great, have have the usual rocky road every once in a while but nothing terrible. Anyways to my question, within the past couple of months I have been noticing more and more that my gf, as it feels like to me, does not hear/pay attention to me. \n\nI have brought this issue up to her and she assures me she does indeed love me and listens to me, but there are still many times throughout each day that I find that I personally feel as though I am not receiving the acknowledgement I feel is good for the relationship for both sides. \n\nJust for clarification she is doing great in the relationship. No big problems, no worries.", "summary": "feels like f2f doesn't listen to me, wonders if my fault or hers and if the grass is greener on the other side."}
{"id": "t3_1pqgjk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend[21F] will not have sex with me[21M].It sucks.", "post": "This is the run of the mill story. I started dating a girl, we started having sex and it was great. However, three years later, she will not have sex with me. We have made love less than five times in almost 12 months. She keeps making different excuses each time I ask about it.\n\nThis has been bothering me to no end. I feel as though I am in my sexual prime as far as age and physical ability, and it is being utterly wasted. She says she likes sex, and wants to have sex...but she never ever does.\n\nShe continually shrugs off my advances. We have talked about it numerous times, and she knows it bothers me. This being said, nothing has changed. I need advice.", "summary": "Girlfriend of 3 years will not have sex with me. She claims to enjoy it, but seems to avoid any sensual contact like the plague. Less than 5 instances of sex/intimacy in almost 12 months. HELP"}
{"id": "t3_4dtcte", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] girlfriend [20F] is going through a bad depression and suggested we broke up. Do I accept this?", "post": "We were dating for 8 months when last month she started to get withdrawn and more insecure with us. It seems she'd get upset with me at the drop of a hat. \n\nThree weeks ago we had the talk. She said it'd be best for us to go on a break for now and she's not ready for any sort of relationship. Initially I fought back, because I love her. I said we could work on it, etc. Was not having it, said she just wasn't ready. \n\nSince then we still talk every day but significantly less. Today she let it slip that she's been having a very bad episode of depression in an unrelated context to our relationship. \n\nBasically, I'm asking if I should pursue her still. IE remind her I'm not going to abandon her because of depression, how much I care for her, etc etc. I feel conflicted. On one hand, she told me wasn't ready and I really want to respect her boundaries for obvious reasons. On the other hand, since it is depression I'm not sure if she knows what she *really* wants and if stepping away would be best. \n\nI'm thinking if she really wanted nothing more to do with me, we wouldn't talk as much as we do, even at the limited rate it is. I've given her opportunities for a NC break. \"If you think it's best to stop talking and go our separate ways, you just need to say\" etc stuff like that. \n\nP.S. I'm feeling a bit insecure today about it, a \"friend\" of mine brought up that it could just be an excuse to sleep around since she said \"break\" and that must translate to promiscuity. I'm 90% positive that's not the case.  \n\nCan someone weigh in?", "summary": "GF elected we go on a break. Discovered today it could potentially be due to depression. Would like someone to talk me through my options"}
{"id": "t3_2z6rof", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 3 years, on a road trip with her and some friends, just found out she's cheating", "post": "I've been with my girlfriend for three years now. We've had our ups and downs, as with any relationship but I love her. I thought our relationship was in a really good place the past couple months. But, the last few days she's been acting very strangely -- not nearly as interested in sex, being very careful to not leave her phone or computer around me, etc. I got pretty suspicious but tried my best to be trusting.\n\nI am ashamed to say I broke. I snooped her texts with her guy friend and found some messages that made it very clear that they are having sex.\n\nI am burning up inside, but I don't think it's fair to my friends to ruin our vacation with an explosion of fighting, especially since we're all stuck in a single car together for the next few days. But, at the same time I don't know if I can manage to act normal around her for that long. How should I go about this? Also, how can I confront her when we get back since I also broke our trust by snooping her texts?", "summary": "Just found out gf is cheating. She, I, and several friends are on a road-trip vacation together. Don't want to ruin my friends' time."}
{"id": "t3_uoq51", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What does reddit think of this new website me and a friend made to support my year abroad ?", "post": "Dear Reddit,\n\nAbout 2 weeks ago, we made this thread : [link](\nWe made a prototype of our website and asked for some feedback on how to make it better.\n\nTaking the information supplied to us by our dear redditors, we re-build the site from scratch. Do note tough, that there are still improvements to be made (such as a tagging system & a search bar).\n\nNow you may ask, what is this website for ?\nWell basically, we tried to make a catalog like website with reactionfaces (as in popular pics or gifs people post to express their feelings about a post) and we tried to keep the design as simple as possible.\n\nNow the main goal of this website is to finance my year abroad to Panama. I am a 18 year old student who will attend university in Panama for a year, but since a lot of you know, this is expensive! So I made this website, which will generate revenue through google ads. \nSo now reddit, do you like our [webpage]  ? We would love to see it being used here.\nIf you have any feedback or are a web developer/designer, please leave a comment if you want to help us out, that would be greatly appreciated.\n\nI will be keeping a blog about my exchange year to panama, so that if you would use my website to support my trip, you get to see some of it too ! (I will also make videos in full HD for you to enjoy and do an IAmA when im done with my year.)\n\nOnce again, the link : www.reactionbox.net\nEnjoy and thanks for reading :)", "summary": "Me and a buddy made a website to support my year abroad, leave a comment if you would use it, if you like it or if you have some feedback."}
{"id": "t3_2qtguz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My psycho ex [22F] broke up with me [23M], finds out I'm dating and loses her mind", "post": "So my ex broke up with me about a month ago after she was seeing someone behind my back. She did me a favor honestly and I just wish she had done it sooner.\n\nAfter she did it, she was posting pics with this other guy and all this crap, so I blocked her and all her friends on literally everything. The only possible way to contact me is through a carrier pigeon. I have completely removed her from my life, she is poison.\n\nI recently went on a date with this girl I really like and plan on asking her out on a second date. Psycho found out about it...\n\nI woke up yesterday morning to an email (the only way to block on gmail is to have them routed to the Spam folder) from her saying how I was a jerk for not telling her I was going on a date, that she's over me, etc. (uuuhhhh????? yeah ok).\nOk whatever, I found it hilarious.\n\nFast forward to around 2:54 pm and I decide to check my phone call blocking app, which keeps a log of phone calls and text messages blocked. Turns out that she tried to call me 28 times in a 25 minute period and sent 33 harassing texts...to which I burst out laughing at my desk. Bitch be cray.\n\nNow I know ignoring is the the best option and that's exactly what I've been doing. I'm just nervous that she's going to say something to this girl I went on a date with. Nobody wants to be harassed by someone just because they went out on a date, and a second date goes out the window if she finds out about this crazy person.\n\nHow/can I get this situation under control without making contact with that lunatic? Am I obligated to tell this new girl about this wacko? Should I contact my ex's friends?", "summary": "ex went off the deep end, don't want this girl I like to find out and get scared away, what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2dzxpd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27F] with my boyfriend [23 M] 8 Months, he won't share his feelings because he wants to protect me.", "post": "So we've been dating for a while and for the last few months we've been in a LDR. Things have been going bad for both of us, him financially and me in my family life. \n\nThe problem is that for some times he'll just clam up completely, says he just wants \"quiet days\" and won't reply very quickly to IM messages, or just disappears. I am not a very chatty person myself, very introvert, and I find it difficult to keep the conversation going, completely on my own. Or if I do talk, he gets irritated by something I say or will roll his eyes or give me the \"disappointment\" face. \n\nOver the days i'll get more and more frustrated, until I'll snap at him. Then he will apologise and say that he is dealing with his own issues and doesn't want to cause me any more stress than I already have (1. I am stressed because of my family but he's making me more stressed because I am thinking, by cutting contact, he is weakening our relationship and causing the \"lets slowly drift apart until we break up\" scenario) \n\nI know I haven't help by becoming more and more worked up and therefore causing more female \"drama\" but I am genuinely worried for our relationship. \n\nI've tried talking to him, saying lets set aside a time to talk your problems through, but he always says \"oh i'm ok\" when I say I have time to talk. \n\nAny help appreciated.", "summary": "Boyfriend won't talk to me about his problems because he feels it stresses me out too much and causes too much anxiety for me. I am stressed because I don't know what's going on with him."}
{"id": "t3_19b8cq", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Looking for some guidance.", "post": "Hello all,\nI'm a male currently at 5'11\"/285lbs. My personal goal is to lose 95lbs by March 2014. I was originally 305lbs. My elliptical workout began December of 2012.\n\nI'm a generally muscular person, mainly in my legs. This is also where the majority of my weight/mass resides. While lifting weights has never been an issue, I've never been good at maintaining a good diet and cardio program.\n\nI've tried going the route of a no Carb diet but I've not been able to maintain it as at my current salary I've had to move towards food with carbs in order to eat at all.\n\nI currently (6 months to date) do not drink soda of any kind anymore, and rarely drink anything with sugar at all.\n\nI'm looking for a good starting cardio work out that I can build and eventually turn into jogging, and any info on a diet that can work on a budget, without starving myself.\n\nI can currently do a 45 minute elliptical \"jog\" ranging between 4.9 and 6 MPH with the settings up to 15 (highest being 25) but I'm not seeing results as fast as I'd like. I acknowledge I may be a bit impatient.\n\nAlso I'd like any personal opinions on things like the p90x, insanity, etc.", "summary": "Guidance on a budget diet and beginner cardio-centric work out ideas. Also some opinions on some extreme workouts. "}
{"id": "t3_j6dst", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I need help understanding my sister's reaction to my father's death", "post": "As much as I want to talk about this to someone, I don't want anyone I know to misunderstand and think ill of her, which is why I've come here. My dad died yesterday after a long battle with cancer; it was very emotional and we all cried, the air was somber. \n\nI know everyone grieves differently, but I can't detect serious sadness from my older sis. She was close to my dad, but today she just laughed and joked around (as did I to an extent) and even yesterday, she was planning on going on a long hike with her boyfriend this morn. I told her not to go, that mom needed us around. She left my room an hour ago, trying on my dresses and picking out the cutest one (and raving about it) in preparation for going to the movie theatre with her bf tonight. I couldn't help but feel completely annoyed that she wasn't spending time with us. \n\nShe's gonna get dressed up as a cowgirl to go on the weekly themed bike rides my area holds tomorrow. I looked at her in disbelief, and she scoffed and told me not to judge her. That I can be sad and mournful all I wanted, she didn't care. \n\nI don't think she's in denial, as we've been discussing all the funeral planning, but I really don't know how to feel about this.", "summary": "older sis *seems* to have moved on rather quickly, and I don't know what to make of it."}
{"id": "t3_3t392l", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Unusual situation, please help!", "post": "So I was recently employed by this company that opened their first store in Canada. I don't know if I'm allowed to reveal the company name or anything, so I will withhold it for now.\n\nMy first day of recorded work (I clocked in and out) was on Tuesday November 3rd. The manager told me that he would like for me to come in for training that day, so I agreed, and worked a couple hours. After that day, I was scheduled to work Friday November 6th (7 hours) and Sunday November 8th (6 hours).  \n\nI was told that the weekly schedule started on Mondays and the schedule was compiled on Sundays. On Sunday night, November 8th, I was told that my first day of work that week would be Thursday for 6 hours. The manager said that he would have the full schedule completed for the next day.  \n\nI go to work on Thursday November 12th expecting to see the full schedule there, but there isn't one. So for the work week of November 9-15, I had only worked one day. \n\nAll of these work hours have been recorded in their POS system (Nova POS).  \n\nTheir lack of professionalism and the fact that for the entire day today (November 16) my calls to the store AND to the manager's cell phone have been ignored have contributed to the decision to resign from this company.  \n\n**However**, I have not been legally employed yet. I did not sign any documents for employment. The only agreement of employment was verbal. The condensed version of the verbal agreement was that I would work for their company at the store as a sales associate with an hourly wage of $11/hour.  \n\nNow that I wish to resign from said company, is there any legal reason the employer might have to not pay me for the hours worked?  \nI haven't talked to my manager about this yet and he has no idea of my intentions to quit, so I'd like to get all of this sorted out before resigning.", "summary": "Employed Nov. 3rd, no employee contract signed, I have worked 3 days with all hours logged in their POS system. Can they say they won't pay me?   "}
{"id": "t3_4b979c", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "New car / Car insurance", "post": "Alright so background  \n-Im a 25 year old male   \n-Making $45k before tax/bonus.   \n-Around March/April of 2014 i got a DUI, i could go into my story or excuse but wont, entered into a plea with the court in may 2015.   \n-Drive a 2008 Nissan 350z  \n\nThe 350z is a fun car but i want to change because A. I want something more practical with ipod hookup, side curtain airbags, rear view camera, traction control, be able to fit more than two people etc. and B. Pretty sure I'm paying $1850 a year for liability atm....   \n\nEven though normally i would look to get a gently used car a couple years old, I really want to get a car with autonomous features like auto braking or lane control etc. was looking at the new 2016 civic.  \n\nOr was looking at 2013 accord, just to give an idea. Want something safe, reliable, well rated. etc.   \n\nI have 5k cash and got a carmax estimate at $7k for the 350z, might be able to find one of those used dealers who offer $500-$1000 over carmax offer but thats what i have to put towards new car. \n\nIs a 2016 civic or 2013 accord a bad idea or out of my range? I want something decent that i can drive for a while but know im kinda more limited in everything i can do because of my DUI. \n\nSuggestions for insurance or car choice?", "summary": "25 male w/ DUI on record currently with '08 350z and $1900/year liability insurance. Want safe practical car, what car/insurance do you suggest?"}
{"id": "t3_4xcdnn", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Mom has beat me, want to change custody", "post": "So my mom has beat me on many occasions to the point where I have had a bruised face and bloodied nose. The last time she did this was awhile ago and I never told an adult. She additionally verbally abused me to the point of calling me her worst mistake at one point. I'm on vacation without my parents and finally told my grandmother and cousin(we are in Washington currently and I live in DC). My grandmother has decided to let me stay here for a little longer after I begged her not to let me go home and she told my parents something about the flights which is why I couldn't go home on the right date. So basically I don't know what to do. I don't want to live with my mom anymore and my dad is nice he just never steps in or anything. I know I no longer have any physical evidence of the abuse so I think it would be hard to press charges but is there any way I could fight to get my grandmother or another family member legal custody over me? I'm 16 if that's important. Thank you.", "summary": "I have been beat on multiple occasions but there is no longer any physical evidence. How can I fight to change legal custody?"}
{"id": "t3_3zic96", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by Realizing I've Been Stuck In A Loop", "post": "I'm a 22 year old male in rural midwest United States. I dedicated much of my time to drawing instead of doing homework while I was in school. I've never had my driver's license, much less owned a car. My only experiences driving have been a beat up Monte Carlo without brakes when test driving for my uncle, and some fun with a golf cart which I accidentally backed into A. My boss' back bumper, and B. a parked trailer. Yeah, I'm not exactly the brightest bulb in the chandelier. This lack of motivation didn't seem like much of a problem until reality bitch slapped me across the face over the last few months.\n\nI went to Colorado in April with the intention of moving in with a couple who I looked up to. Shortly after my arrival, our apartment complex was bought up and our rental rate doubled making my $10 per hour (which I was my highest paying job) useless when it came to making a living. We ended up moving in with another friend of ours on a one acre plot. Five people including myself, and six dogs in a double wide. We had the intent of starting a permaculture garden there for our own garden of eden. Unfortunately, I was also a dumbass and didn't consider the unemployment rate of the town is 23% for folks my age on top of the fact I don't drive. Needless to say I was feeling some immense pressure as the last of my funds dwindled. I found a way out through my grandparents (lifesaving wonderful folk.) This did not make my Colorado friends happy as they felt I could've done more to get work, and maybe I could've in retrospect.\n\nNow back home (grandparents' home, which I was raised in since I was a youngling), I've been unemployed since October. It's shit weather, I have no vehicle, I have good relationships with people...but they are over sixty miles away. I feel pretty low, and I'm not sure how I can crawl out of this hole. I just want to make some goddamn progression.", "summary": "I'm a 22 yr old unappreciative burn out still living with his grandparents :\\. Living the lyrics from Ill Mind of Hopsin 5 -_-."}
{"id": "t3_3l5v8j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [20/M] admitted to my [21F] girlfriend that I have thought of other girls during sex", "post": "I recently asked my girlfriend if she ever thought of another guy during sex. When she answered no, she asked me the same question. I felt that I should answer truthfully, and probably said one of the stupidest things I've ever said: yes. She proceeded to get extremely pissed off and for the first time in our relationship she threatened breaking up. She has troubles with body image, so you can see how much this affected her. She eventually calmed down, but said that she will not have sex for a long time with me if I'm going to be thinking about other girls. \n\nI feel as though this is a common behavior, and I have no control over where my mind wanders when we have sex for an hour. I still really love her, but how do I explain it isn't because she isn't good enough or anything like that.", "summary": "How do I explain that randomly thinking about other girls during sex doesn't mean she isn't good enough/ what should I say just in general."}
{"id": "t3_2uqcb6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21M] might have to breakup with my GF [21F] of 8 months because I think I'm gay", "post": "To start, I've always had these random episodes of gay thoughts to the point where I would masturbate to gay porn. Well, a while ago I met this wonderful girl and eventually we started dating.\n\nShe and I have been together for eight months and I can tell I make her feel a way that no other guy has felt before. I'm only her second boyfriend and I have always treated her as best as possible. \n\nI think I have to breakup with her though because I'm getting the idea that I might be gay. There's a feeling I get thinking about gay sex that I don't get with women, even though I would always check them out when I was single. Overall I'm confused and want to explore my sexuality, but breaking up with her would break my heart.\n\nJust thinking about doing it makes tears swell up a little bit. I want to keep making her smile and feel loved, because I do believe I lover her. I can't imagine not being in her life. She has made me a better person and her companionship is great.", "summary": "I may have to break up with my girlfriend to explore my sexuality, but I don't want to lose here. I still love her."}
{"id": "t3_2kfcrc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [23 M] in a new relationship with a girl [24 F], recently made a terrible mistake", "post": "I've been dating a girl going on two months now and we are both pretty happy.  Recently I was at an event without her and drinking with some friends but we got separated.  I ran into another group of people who I didn't really know that well and they started talking to me for a while.  \n\nWith the new people, one of the girls asked if I was planning on heading to a party at a particular house, and I said yes.  She followed me there and we had a bit more to drink.  Because I was pretty drunk the details aren't super clear, but I think she started to make out with me and I didn't stop her.  \n\nNext, she isn't feeling too well so I get her some water and crackers and call one of her friends who can take her home.  Her friend gets here and tries to get her to leave but she wants to sleep here.  I tell her friend it's ok, and that I'll sleep downstairs (I really did mean this).  The girl wants me to sleep with her though, so I do.  We lay there for a while, then make out a bit, then she keeps trying to get me to have sex and I keep avoiding it, but eventually it happens.  \n\nI've never cheated in a relationship before and I feel absolutely terrible for letting it happen.  How do I let my girlfriend know, and any other advice?", "summary": "got drunk and didn't say no to a girl who wanted to have sex.  How do I handle this with my girlfriend?"}
{"id": "t3_2lta75", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/M] can't seem to be happy with my GF [26/F] after a rough breakup.", "post": "So, my girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years. We started living together, and then she went into a deep depression after a friend's death. It got really bad and destroyed our relationship. I ended up moving out and we broke up. It was devastating.\n\nWe were broken up for about a month and a half and I started to get better and do things for myself and got happier. Then, she came to me and told me she was on new medication and seeing a therapist and was feeling like her old self again. She apologized a lot and we got back together because we still love eachother.\n\nIt's been about 3 weeks since we've been back together, and I am just not happy. I feel like I want to see her when we are apart, but then once we are together, I don't want to be with her. I've been trying to figure this out for a few days now. I didn't know if I should just break up with her or give it more time and try to change some stuff in the relationship to make it better.\n\nI ended up talking to her last night and told her all of this. I told her I don't want to break up because I love her and don't want to lose her, but I am also unhappy. She was devastated and told me to take a few days to think it over and figure out what I want.\n\nI honestly don't know. I have no idea. I'm literally 50/50 on the matter. I don't want to hurt her and I will miss her, but i'm also not happy and feel like I might be happier single.", "summary": "gf and I had an ugly breakup. we got back together but i'm unhappy. She told me to take a few days and figure out what I want, but I can't figure it out."}
{"id": "t3_2gg8dg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need help moving on. Ex has a new boyfriend and I am in a bad mood at all times.", "post": "I (M- 21) was in a very loving relationship for over a year with my ex (F-20) until mid-June when we realized that we both did not want to try the long distance thing (We both got into uni's and she's staying near home and I've moved out of state). We were very civil about it and both agreed to remain friends. It was awesome until recently- we would talk frequently all the time about everything. \n\nNow she has a new boyfriend and I have slipped into a phase of pseudo-depression because I just cannot handle the idea of some other guy with a woman I still very much love. I have issues with self-worth and this has been awful for me. We have talked about it and I have resolved to do some soul searching and trying to work on myself. I am very supportive of her and her choices and want to preserve a friendship with her (she was by far my best friend before we dated and I trust no one else more than her). \n\nWhat can I do to expedite my healing process? She was the first relationship I've ever had so that might explain why I'm being such a dipshit about all this.", "summary": "Broke up with my girlfriend of over a year, we decided to stay friends. She has a new boyfriend now and it kills me inside. Still want to be friends with her- what do I do to help myself move on?"}
{"id": "t3_onqeq", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Dear Reddit, I made a decision today on which I would like other people's perspectives.", "post": "I am president of the study association that is linked to my university. We're rather small time, but we're there in public view for all to see.\n\nRecently, a teacher of ours suffered a fatal myocardial infarction(heart attack). I did not know the man, he teaches a course that isn't in my Major. We never exchanged words on the hallways nor did I knew who he was when I heard the news until I saw his picture.\n\nNow, my peers(read; the school's supervisor to our association) who would abandon us if it would give them another euro to spend on free iPads for all teachers, are pressuring me into attending his funeral.\n\nI consider a funeral a rather sacred thing, though I am not religious. It is the final chance for friends and family to say their farewells to the person on display and I do not consider myself the right person to be part of such an intimate and private undertaking over a person that I did not know. I am told that I should \"represent the students as a whole\". I am eager to reply that \"If the students wish to pay their respects to the good man, they should come them-fuckin'-selves instead of using me as an excuse for their friday-night hangover\". I volunteered for the function on a free-will basis and I will not be pressured into feeling guilt over something I have no say in.\n\nI have already made my decision and I will not attend.\nMy only question for you, as a generally unbiased community, is; What is your view on this whole situation?\n\nShed a light on the matter that has a different wavelength than mine.", "summary": "Not attending teachers funeral on account of not knowing the man. Peers pressuring me to attend. Me pressuring them to fornicate a cactus. Your opinion?"}
{"id": "t3_lsc2e", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hipsters vs. Hipsters, what's the definition?", "post": "So, while talking to my brother (who lives in Monterrey, Mexico, I live in South Texas), we started discussing the definition of hipster. He, said that over there a **hipster** is a person who dresses nice and listens to music that isn't popular anymore (but that was, so, I'm assuming *oldies*).\nThen, I said, for me, hipsters are douchebags who wear fedoras, vest and 3D glasses, who look as if they were anorexic, and like music that's odd, and nobody understands, and thus, makes them different and *cool*, when in reality, not even they understand it. Oh, and also, do recreational drugs.\nAm I wrong??", "summary": "Brother says hipsters are cool (Mexican definition) while I say they're douchebags...am I wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_qoflz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I'm 25 unemployed with only 2 semesters of college education. I'm thinking about going back, but I'm currently broke.", "post": "Hey Reddit, I am a 25 year old musician from Florida who is going nowhere fast in the music industry, like I said in the title, I only have 2 semesters of college at a community college under me, and I'm currently unemployed. \nI've been feeling incredibly unproductive as of late, and I despise this feeling. \n\nI was dumb enough at 18 to think that I could make a living in music without college to fall back on, and I'm starting to wish I had that backup plan.\n\nI'm pretty much doing just enough odds and ends to save up money for this one last push at promoting a solo album, and if it doesn't work I want to return to college, but I don't know how to go about getting financial aid and all that, my parents are letting me stay with them again and I hate to take advantage of their generosity for too much longer.", "summary": "What's the best way for me to go about getting financial aid, and on my feet for the first time to enter the real world outside of music?"}
{"id": "t3_j7pf9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the truth when it comes to Nitrogen filled tires?", "post": "Ok Reddit, I need help wading through the crap on the internet. A couple of days ago I came out of the bar to find my tire pressure sensor was indicating low pressure. A quick check revealed a screw in one of my tires of my brand new car. It was still pretty inflated so I went home. Long story short it's in an area that isn't easily patched and I've been trying to find a place that'll patch it and refill it with Nitrogen. It's just now getting lower than I care to let it and I was going to top it off when my mother (who had called a few places for me out of the blue, best mom ever, today is her anniversary) said you can't because once you put regular air in you can't put Nitrogen back in. When I bought the car the dealer said that doing just that would be totally fine. Come to find out, there is a lot of confusion at tire places and on the internet about Nitrogen in tires. So I ask you, the great Reddit, what's the real story here?", "summary": "What's the truth about Nitrogen tires? Are there any real benefits and can you add regular air to them without ruining them?"}
{"id": "t3_2rfz41", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Manipulative ex [25M] refuses to log out of my social media.", "post": "I just recently broke up with my ex-boyfriend. If you want the info on that, then heres a link \n\nWhen we were together, he demanded my passwords for my social media sites including facebook and instagram. I know, that was crazy of me to do. But I really loved him and thought it was ok, so I definitely learnt my lesson. I would never do half of what I did in that relationship. Thank goodness for that. \n\nNow, I've changed all my passwords and on Facebook I've logged out all devices so I know he is off of that. BUT instagram doesn't seem to have that feature that I know of? I'm still getting notifications that his friends have got a instagram account, so that means that he is logged in on one of his devices still. \n\nI've approached this topic several times. I've asked him to please sign out of my instagram. It is my personal account that I made the bad choice of letting him on. He keeps telling me he will or he has, but I still get the notifications about his facebook friends getting an instagram. So, he obviously hasn't.\n\nIs there anything I can do in this situation? I know this is all my fault for being so foolish in this relationship, but I'd like to get this fixed as this is my personal information.", "summary": "Ex is still logged onto instagram. Changed password but doesn't do anything if you're already logged in on a device. Any advice that you know of to fix this that I haven't thought of?"}
{"id": "t3_2baut3", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "an off my chest post ABOUT my chest.", "post": "I'm 15 and I have Pectus excavatum,for those of  you that don't know what it is it's like having a gap between your pecs A.K.A. the middle of your chest is sunken in and on August the second I'm going with my school  AND another school on a 9 day long trip to the beach.I'm not sure if I should be excited or terrified.\n\nA year ago I didn't care because I had a smaller circle of  friends and none of them noticed it (or they did but just didn't make a big deal out of it).Now I have a bunch more firends but I also met some assholes that I could see making fun of me.This wouldn't be bad because I have thick skin and I don't get offended easily but that doesn't really work when something is genetic.It's not MY fault i was born like that,so that sucks that I can't defend myself but oh well...\n\nThe worst part is my friends that I talked to about the beach were all talking about how they have to atleast bang one chick and I'm here thinking that would be probably impossible considering most of them are in fit shape and I'm...well...me.\n\nBasically,if anyone has been through this situation or has any advice on how I should tackle this please let me know,It would mean a lot to me.", "summary": "I have a sunken in chest and I'm going on a trip with 2 schools and I'm terrified of having 9 days of hell over there."}
{"id": "t3_273oe1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27M] hooked up with my acquaintance [26F] the day after she broke up with her boyfriend. A little unsure if they really broke up. Feel like a jackass.", "post": "Have met and hung out with both 26F and her (ex?)-bf in group settings maybe 2-3 times this year. They were together for almost 2 years. I don't mess around with girls in relationships. My mom cheated on my dad and seeing that damage shaped my beliefs, I think cheating is vile. I was never close to this girl or the guy, but definitely knew who they were, greeted them in passing, etc.\n\nThis weekend 26F and I were at the same bar, people all night had been saying she dumped her guy, and then she told me the same. Moved to an after party that she invited me to and there she was openly hitting on me. I let her initiate everything. I assumed we'd make out and then she'd bail, but she invited my back to her place, initiated taking off my clothes, her clothes, and getting the condom. Sex was great. \n\nI assumed it was a one time thing given the circumstances but she's been texting me so that led me to look her up. Found that Facebook and Instagram still have all their \"in a relationship\" status and couples pictures up so now I'm feeling a little guilty and worried about the whole thing. \n\nShe outright stated to me and everyone at the party that they were broken up. I did ask her if it was a temporary or permanent break and she said never say never but it's over indefinitely. It's a hippie/yoga/weed crew so I took that as they have no plans to get back together but there's no way of predicting the universe... that kind of philosophy. I've been told they were never an on-and-off couple or anything unstable like that.", "summary": "Casual sex with a girl who had just dumped her boyfriend (who I've met) that same weekend. Feeling guilty. Am I supposed to wait longer than that? Or is that the girl's concern and not my issue?"}
{"id": "t3_4mlx3k", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18F] with my boyfriend [19M] 3 years, he's moving across the continent and going to be roommates with a girl", "post": "Boyfriend and I have been dating for roughly 3 years.\n\nI trust him implicitly and don't think he would do anything wrong or unfaithful, but this rubs me the wrong way.\n\nHe will be moving across the continent next year for university, I'm staying here. In the process of him trying to find a roommate, a girl he met last year (on a visit to the university campus) reached out to him and asked if he would want to room with her. He admittedly told her \"yes\" immediately, then backtracked and said he would need to \"sort some details out.\"\n\nThis is when he told me. He asked if I would be okay with him rooming with a girl, which I told him previously I'm not, and gave me more context about the whole thing. He said he would take a day to think about it and weigh both of our feelings in the matter.\n\nBasically, I told him that I would trust him, but it made me very uncomfortable to think that he would be around this girl pretty much all the time while I'm back home, far away. He talked to some friends, and decided that he would accept her offer.\n\nThis is where we're at currently. I feel so icky about it. I've talked to him multiple times about it, outlining why exactly it doesn't sit right with me, but he keeps reiterating that it's the best thing for him since he has a tough time making friends and she actually reached out to him first. I don't want to be crazy girlfriend (he keeps saying \"you know I'll have friends who are girls,\" which has never been an issue -- it's the fact that *she* contacted him, he said yes without thinking of me, and then didn't mention me until after I told him he should make sure she knows he has a girlfriend).", "summary": "Boyfriend is moving far away, rooming with a girl who he met previously and who reached out to him. I feel uncomfortable but he stresses it's the best thing for him. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_3gjipx", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by not sharing my cookie.", "post": "So I went to by usual coffee shop today and decided to treat myself to one of their awesome spicy chocolate cookies. Server behind the counter mentioned she'd been eyeing them off all morning but opted for some banana bread instead. Cue banter on how she'd made a mistake and should have gotten the cookie instead, and now will have to double up and get her own cookie. \n\nMoney was exchange, I go to wait for my coffee and the server goes to munch on her banana bread. \n\nNow here's the fuck up, while waiting she comes out and offers me a bit of her banana bread. I'm like \"that's really kind\", took the proffered bit of banana bread, thanked her for sharing, and blissfully started munched away tuning back out my coffee waiting world. Didn't even think to share the cookie I was holding, the exact one we'd been talking, that she said she'd be eyeing off, even after she shared her food.\n\nIt only occurred to me what a jerk I was half way down the street while guiltily sipping on my coffee.", "summary": "Someone kindly shared their food with me. I kept sweet delicious cookie to myself. Need to find a new coffee shop."}
{"id": "t3_1xkpwa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Looking for a lawyer dealing house fires/personal injury? Trouble finding reviews of local lawyers.", "post": "Our home was burned down due to some type of faulty leak within the gas pipes.... something to do with the furnace and the gas line being exposed or leak.....Nonetheless a family member has had over 50% of his body ravaged by 3rd degree burns.  We've been focusing on our family member, and now we're being told to contact a lawyer ASAP.  I've gotten a few names/numbers, yet I can't find any review sites/apps for local lawyers....AND for the sites I did find, there was only ever 1 review from clients, and then 3-5 peer reviews or colleagues of the lawyer giving them praise..", "summary": "House burned down, family member severely burned--- I found 1 review site, only ever 1 review of lawyer, and the rest are peer reviewers/colleagues giving praise."}
{"id": "t3_zdoj6", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How to overcome fear of physical intimacy and whether it's ok to talk about it...", "post": "I've been on a couple dates with a girl I met online, and I'm worried that my fear of physical intimacy and the slow rate at which I get used to people is getting in the way (or will soon).  \n\nTo give a little background, I'm 27m and it's been over 2 years since I last did anything with a girl (not a virgin, though).  I'm sort of a shy guy who doesn't fully open up until he's gotten to know people. Once I do I make friends easily, but it takes time.  I'm also afraid of girls: in general I have trouble interacting with them unless I somehow remove all sexual tension (and thus interest) from the relationship, and so you can see why it's been a rather prolonged dry spell.\n\nAnyway, I've been on OKCupid for a while and been on a few dates, but none of them have gone past the first date until the most recent one.  This girl (~25f), in contrast to most, I felt pretty at ease speaking to, and while I'm not comfortable enough yet to deploy puns and silly humor I usually do when among friends, I can see it getting there.  But now we're up to the third date potentially, and I haven't even hugged her.  I'm scared and out of practice and in general am not a very touchy guy (and if I'm not comfortable enough to crack a joke, how am I going to do much else!?), but I also know that this is sending weird and mixed signals.  More or less I want to, but am immobilized with doubt.\n\nOn some level I know I need to sack up and do it, but thinking about it makes me nervous enough to feel a little physically sick.  Is this something I can bring up casually (and just say that I really like her, but need to move slowly), or is that not ok?  To give a little more insight into the dynamic, she sent me message after the first date saying that she'd had fun and wanted to hang out again, so I think she feels something there, too...", "summary": "Is it fair to bring up (in as casual a manner as possible) my rustiness/fears to make up for my lack of move-making?"}
{"id": "t3_ryeb0", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My girlfriend thinks she's better than me. How do I nicely tell her that she is not?", "post": "Hello, long time reader first time poster.. My situation is this, My fiance and I are graduate students at different schools with equal credibility. I am a masters student in geophysics while she is a PhD student in social work. she constantly tells me that her program is far more rigorous than mine is even tho I have seen the work she does and I fell like I honestly can do that work in my sleep, I however tend to hide my work from her. I am in no way trying to slam any majors here. I believe that every program in college has challenges equal to the next, but it really ticks me off when she claims that I should have more time than her, and that my program is easier than hers because Im in a masters program and she is in a PhD program. I'm currently researching and writing my thesis, and she is in her first year of the program (she went through the non-thesis option for her masters btw). Also when I finish this I highly doubt that I will do this school s**t again, and when we are married and she is addressed with Dr instead of Mrs (my last name) I am afraid she will disrespect me further. How do I get her to understand that I am working just as hard as she is (probably harder but I'll settle for equality)?", "summary": "my fiance is in a PhD program and I am in a masters and she constantly tells me that I'm not working as hard as she is and that is soooooo not the case. how do I let her know?"}
{"id": "t3_1911lr", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Is there a good solution to all the mass amount of usernames and passwords I need to remember for every website?", "post": "I'm sure I'm not the only one that has this problem. I have nearly 100 active accounts between forums, social media, email, financial institutions, and whatever. Some assign you a username others allow you to pick. Some require different lengths. Then you have the password problem: remember when you could have lengths less than 6 characters? I still have some of those passwords. Alphanumberic only? Special characters mandatory? Its insane. As of right now, I have a txt file with all my websites, the username, and password I used. This works kinda okay, but then I have multiple computers so I have to maintain the file in 3 locations? Sure, you can \"always remember\" but that doesn't work on my banking, phone, and utilities sites. Oh, and getting a new computer? Enter everything all over again (if you remember your username/password). On top of that, I'm a developer, so I end up using multiple browsers (sure, I have a favorite that I use more often than the others, but that doesn't mean I don't use 2-3 different browsers per computer). \n\nTo preempt any doucher that says \"I only have a facebook, gmail, and reddit account, that's all I need and that's all you should need.\" Don't fucking bother. I'm here looking for a solution, not listen to some dickface pat himself on the back about something so trivial. I have a social/entertainment side, a finance/professional side, and a developer/hobby side that I'm trying really hard to keep separate (for security AND professionalism) so I'm going to need facebook and reddit and several developer forums and youtube and three financial institutions and multiple email addresses (for each version of me) and lets not forget about every place I buy something from online... I need an account for all of them too.", "summary": "Is there an efficient way to maintain the mass amount of usernames and passwords you acquire through years of using the internet?"}
{"id": "t3_2ymsst", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "15M my girlfriend 14F ended it and I'm confused.", "post": "Go ahead. I'm 15, I shouldn't be dating, blah blah blah, relationships come and go, blah blah blah. Whatever. I did. Me and this girl were EXTREMELY close for 2 years before I decided I wanted her and she felt the same. She ended it claiming she still likes me but enjoys being the best friends that we were more than being my girlfriend. You can say what you like, but I really and truly love this girl. I've talked to her, there's no getting it back. I am attracted to no one else. I think of her 24/7 and come up with some way something or some event correlates with her. Today, I saw a completely beautiful, gorgeous girl. She kinda smiled when we made eye contact, and I recognized her attractiveness. I processed it. But I didn't feel attracted to her at all. AT ALL. I literally only like my ex girlfriend and I'm scared by that. You're free to ridicule me now. Just keep in mind I'm an innocent, sensitive, sweet 15 year old. Seriously though, I'm not so sure I'm getting over her anytime soon at all. I'm significantly less happy than I was when we were dating, and I've been a complete ass to my friends for it. I just feel like crap, all around. I don't know. Help?", "summary": "Girlfriend broke up with me, says she still likes me but wants to be best friends as we were very close before dating. I'm attracted to no one else and I'm kinda hurt."}
{"id": "t3_4wk1ef", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (26/f) Finally Going to Confront Her (24/f) About Why We Stopped Talking. Does This Sound Okay?", "post": "This post is an update to this [one](\n\nI never ended up seeing Jess that week, but today my co-worker (and mom) told me that Jess stopped by my store looking for me and my sister. My mom said she was there \"with a girl.\" But left quickly when she didn't see us. Apparently the girl (her american gf) said \"but you wanted to stop here!\" as Jess was leaving the store. I explained to my mom that a few weeks ago Jess invited me and my sister to a boat dance cruise taking place tomorrow, so I'm sure she stopped by my store to ask if we were still going (and to show off her new gf lol -_-)\n\nHonestly, I'm really glad I didn't see Jess today. I wasn't prepared lol \n\nBUT I plan to FINALLY send Jess a message either tonight or tomorrow morning. I was gonna say \"Hey, I won't be able to make it. Completely forgot I already made plans to see this girl. Thanks for inviting anyway~ Also this is kinda random but back in Feb I saw a fb post you made about how people don't like black people unless it's a fetish, just a couple of days after hanging out with me and toni. Not gonna lie it felt like a low-key jab at us, and it shocked and disappointed me. That's why I distanced myself; I don't really know where we stand anymore.\" \n\nPlease let me know what you think of that message, I could really use some feedback. And definitely feel free to tell me what you would say. Thanks for reading!", "summary": "My ex-crush/friend invited me and sister out tomorrow. I'm not going because our unresolved past, and I'm going to send her a message very soon telling her why. Does this sound ok?"}
{"id": "t3_j8amc", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So you want to make a difference? (American Politics)", "post": "This is an open discussion, thank you for taking your time to contribute. If you think this is a \"circle-jerk\" or pointless, that's cool, the back button is at the top of the screen.\n\nFirst: This is about United States Politics, if this is of no interest to you then you clearly did not read the title. This doesn't mean Americans only, we live in a global society and our governments decisions and actions affect everyone. \nSecond: This should not be an indictment of the wrongs committed by the government. Everyone has their own opinions on what injustice has been done to the people or to industry. The ceaseless bickering has stagnated us, we argue and drain our energy and then retire to the conveniences we are so blessed to have, believing that to act would be as fruitless as the senseless arguments we get caught up in.\n \n\nFor the sake of accomplishing something let's start this discussion with how to get started. How do we organize effectively? How can we communicate efficiently? What can be done to overcome the mass polarization of the nation? All I know for certain is that we are divided. Is this the worst divide in our nations history? I don't know, but I doubt it. We aren't killing each other yet, that's something at least. Our freedoms are threatened but they are not gone, if nothing is to be gained what is there to lose by engaging to try to accomplish something? What do we need to do? How do we go from one to many?", "summary": "Hello. I'm Loraint and I want to make a difference, if you're here I assume you do to. How can we do this?"}
{"id": "t3_34bfum", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my crush [16 F] duration 0, gave me an odd sounding rejection. I need help understanding what she meant.", "post": "So yesterday I asked out this girl I like and she asked for a day to think about it, and she replied to me today. Here response was \"Yeah [my name], I can't do this right now. You're a good guy but I'm not a good girl I'm sorry.\"  \n\nShe parties a lot and knows a good number of people who commit a lot of felonies, and I'm a generally tame person. That being said, I don't believe I've given any sign that I'm uncomfortable with that type of environment, hell, we both intend to go to a party together later this year.  I just want to better understand what she meant by this.", "summary": "Yeah [my name], I can't do this right now. You're a good guy but I'm not a good girl I'm sorry.\" What does this mean?"}
{"id": "t3_2mnrby", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25f] seem to have trouble being seen as a romantic interest by men", "post": "I keep running into this problem where the guys I'm romantically interested are not interested in me. Which is valid, not everyone is meant for everyone but it's becoming a pattern and I'm getting very annoyed. Despite knowing my feelings, they justify continuing to have a friendship by not sleeping with me (bc I guess they don't realize feelings can occur without sex). Of course I don't want to be used but it's incredibly frustrating to tell someone how you feel about them and have them just brush it off.\n\n The most recent guy this happened with[25m] although I told him I didn't want to continue a friendship with him for my emotional sanity, he kept reiterating how he really wants to be my friend and just doesnt want to start anything physical bc he values my friendship. He's open to being in a relationship but isn't romantically interested in me. Apparently he's pretty sad that I don't want to just be friends. Im just looking for some advice to get out of this rut I find myself stuck in there's a pretty limited dating pool where I am so I can't just date to my hearts content.", "summary": "for lack of a better phrase, I eke getting friend zoned by guys I've expressed interest for, any advice to avoid this would be great."}
{"id": "t3_u844z", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "When I was at a club last night a seemingly genuine girl was instantly in love with a guy who said \"Is that a *insert designer name* dress? I am wearing Hugo Boss\"... Reddit, what are your thoughts/stories about the clubbing scene?", "post": "After the a few more similar encounters I only began to have a good time when I started treating the whole night like a massive joke. eg. girl compliments my jacket, and asks \"what brand is it?\" I reply, 50% off from target. \n\nSeriously, am I the loser to think it's lame to talk about brand names and openly judge each other like this?\n\nI had another conversation with a dude I just met who proceeded to boast to me about how \"successful\" he is after i subtly asked what he was up to this weekend (in charge of all these projects etc etc). After 15 minutes or so when he was done telling me how good he is and offering me a job, he asked me what I do. So I said I do online surveys for a living. (I am 21, he is 21...)\n\nReddit is this normal?", "summary": "Call me slow but I think I have learnt that the clubbing scene is not a place you can expect to meet genuine people."}
{"id": "t3_12yk7r", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm (23f) literally going crazy over my bf (23m) of 2 months, i'm obsessed about him breaking up with me. Should I break up with him for my own sanity?", "post": "I have been very emotionally unstable the entire time we've been with each other. I think about him all the time, but it's gotten to such an extreme I have to retake classes because my work suffered so much from it. When he doesn't text me back I burst out crying. Im so afraid to lose him, the fear is paralyzing. \n\nHe is in love with me, and he wants to be with me and me to trust him. \n\nI'm not usually like this, and I try to hide it from him as much as possible (i'm afraid I might scare him away if he sees how obsessed I have become), but it's ruining my life. I overeat because I feel stressed. I can't concentrate on anything. I can't sleep. Nothing feels important but him. I am very aware how unhealthy this is, and I'm really embarrassed this is happening to me. \n\nI'm constantly afraid and waiting for my heart to be broken, I can't function. Should I just end this, so the insecurity is gone and I can get over this whole ordeal and get my life back?", "summary": "My obsession with rejection by my bf is ruining my life. Should I just end it myself so I can get on with my life?"}
{"id": "t3_1a21oa", "subreddit": "self", "title": "My girlfriends mother is a bad person and I do not know what to do.", "post": "My(17) girlfriend(15), we will call her J, have been together for around 6 months now and since the day I have met her mother she has been belittling her, treating her poorly, and has previously hit her. J's mother is in her mid-forties and does nothing but smoke, drink, work, and constantly have sex with random dudes. It's not that these things are bad in itself, but she projects herself onto her daughter. \n\nTwo weeks ago we got caught being at her house home alone. J and I were just cuddling watching a movie, but her mother freaked out. I can understand why she was mad but what she did was what I believe out of line. Because from before this point the only belittling I heard was from J. But the next thing that I know her mother comes in screaming at J saying,\"You're a stupid whore. You are worthless to me. I'm glad that your brother is at least somewhat valuable.\"\n\nI wanted to stay and protect J, but I knew there was nothing that I could do. J's mother took everything thing that was of use to J. She took her phone, iPod,", "summary": "Girlfriends mother bullies daughter, leaves her home alone most of the week with little food, and girlfriend wants me to let her mother basically walk all over her. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_v159k", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My girlfriend broke up with me tonight. I'm not sure how to react or what to do. Can I have some sincere advice, Reddit?", "post": "I'm sure this topic/question has come up a lot on askreddit, but honestly I don't have the patience to look through and find a previous one right now. I am on the verge of being inconsolable and I just want some advice from impartial people asap.\n\nWe've been together for six months. But we have been good friends for another six months before that. We met through a mutual friend but we live an hour and a half from each other, and when we went to school we were four hours apart. Most of our relationship has been based on distance, but we learned to accept it.\n\nTonight on the phone she said she just doesn't feel the same way as she did before about us. She thinks we're two different people now and thinks there is no returning to what we were. I am just extremely saddened. All I can think about is how great things were between us, and even more, all the things we talked about doing and experiencing together in the future but now never can.\n\nI know it's a pretty vague question, but where do I go from here? Yeah yeah, hit the gym, get a hobby, ect. But that's not what I am looking for now. It will be helpful down the line, but not right now at 12:30 a.m. Can anyone offer true, sincere advice, or share an anecdote about their break-up experience and how they recovered? I'm typing this only a couple hours after the break up, so I'm still really upset.\n\nOh, also, she wants to meet in person sometime next week to \"finalize\" our breakup. She said she felt bad doing it over the phone. I don't know if I want to see her.", "summary": "girlfriend broke up with me, wounds are still fresh, looking for sincere, non \"hit the gym/get a hobby\" advice for how to deal with this heartbreak."}
{"id": "t3_2zymt8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (19 M) be happy on vacation with GF (18 F) problems?", "post": "So I am going on vacation with my family tomorrow morning. Last night me and my girlfriend of 9 months got into a big fight and she had told me a lot of things she has been lieing to me about. She didn't cheat on me, and I know this. Tonight she was going to stay the night with me before I left in the morning, but instead she just now called me and said shes staying at her friends house. \n\nIt seems like every vacation I have been on for the past 5 years have been terrible. Me and my old ex gfs always fought when I was on vacation, and one time my ex GF even cheated on me while I was on vacation, so I always have a rough time trusting my SO while im away, no matter who it is. \n\nI have been extremely depressed for about a year and a half. Like actual depression and anxiety, not just some little sadness. I have extreme anxiety so I am always worrying about something and my brain is just always racing. My parents have tried everything they can to make me happy, and I greatly appreciate it, I really do, but I just cant be happy. \n\nI really want to go and enjoy this time with my family this week. but I know that I will just be sad and wondering what my GF is doing, (she doesnt have a cell phone so she can only message me when she has WiFi). I want to be able to not worry about all of the stuff she told me last night ( all of the stuff she has been lieing to me about). But i just cant help but know it will be running through my head the whole time.. all of the things she told me. And it will sadden me. \n\nI really want to be happy and have fun on this vacation, because it makes me feel so bad when my parents try so hard to go on vacation to make me and my brothers happy, and it hurts when they tell me they hate it that Im always sad on vacations. \n\nAny advice? Thank you all for listening. Sorry for the wall of text", "summary": "I am always upset about something when I am on vacation. My gf told me everything that she has been lieing to me about last night. Im leaving for vaca in the morning. How to be happy on the trip?"}
{"id": "t3_oj5h2", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Ladies of Reddit, I am a guy who is on the cusp of breaking out of the friend zone, Advice Needed!", "post": "Start by saying, Throw away account. I will try to be brief yet thourough and then answer any additional questions.\n\nI am 23, M, I have been friends with a girl lets say \"Amy\" for 5 years now, There has no always been strong emotions but I have always enjoyed her company and would call her one of my best and consistent friend over the last 5 years. Last year I told her I liked her, was not sure what to expect, her response: was she wasn't sure what to think because she didn't want to lose her best friend if we didn't work out. I with sadness agreed.\n\nFast forward to January 2ed, I have the same Talk, say that I still have these feelings, and want to see where they go. She gives same response about not sure cause not wanting to risk losing me as a friend, This time I grab her Hand and tell her no matter what happens in this new stage of our friendship I Promise that if it doesn't work we will always remain friends. \"IT WORKS!\" for the most part, we hold hands and go for a walk, 2 weeks later it is not un common for us to hold hands or when she comes over to watch TV/Movie we cuddle, Tonight I go in for the goodnight kiss! its successful but then we end up having a long talk about how she goes back and forth and still is afraid to risk our friendship and how that she doesn't want to keep moving forward and end up hurting me. I just don't know what to do to keep things moving forward without scaring her off. I have explained that it is worth the risk but I don't think she sees that as comfort. Any Advice?", "summary": "Just as I took one step out of the friend zone, girl is nervous that it won't work and our friendship will be over, I really want her to follow her heart, and not over think it, any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_24bwk2", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Looking for opinions on where to intern. Washington D.C area or Seattle area", "post": "So here is the deal; I have two internship opportunities presented to me. \n \nThe first one is 12 week internship for a T-mobile located in the Seattle area.  I found a temporary living situation which would cost me about 1,100 every month for a furnished studio apartment and all utilities.  It pays 22/hr at about 40 hours a week along with $2,000 dollars for living expenses for my stay during the internship.  After gas, food, rent and all that jazz I budgeted around a $8,000(minus taxes) dollar profit for my stay. The west coast is also where I desire to live someday, so it would be neat to test out the area even though its only a temporary spot.\n\nThe second internship is a 8 week internship in the D.C area, in Virginia technically about 20 minutes away from D.C.  It puts me in an apartment with another intern paying for all my rent, appliances, and gives me a food plan. They also pay me 500 dollars a week so around $4,000 dollars for my stay (again minus taxes).  They also mention that they train their interns and hope to hire them after graduation for a full time job which is comforting in today's job market.", "summary": "Choice 1- Seattle area 7,000-8,000 dollar profit over 12 weeks in an area I wish to live in someday."}
{"id": "t3_j6hyw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is the worst thing you've ever had to confess to your parents/authority figures?", "post": "I'll start us off.  Flashback: I'm in sixth grade, painfully awkward and unfathomably shy.  Some boys in my English class tease me every goddamn day, using words I pretend not to understand (such as whore, slut, cunt nugget, nigger, etc.)  Sometimes calling me them, sometimes ridiculing me for not knowing what they meant (I did).\n\nI fake sick or have some excuse every single day for why I can't go to school.  Eventually my parents confront me about it and force me, in the middle of McDonald's, to repeat everything those douches said.  NEVER had I been so horrified, each syllable felt like a block of poison cement.  But, happily, the little bastards got suspended thanks to my ballin' English teacher finally laying down the law.", "summary": "Or actually it might've been the time I inadvertently came out as bi to my mom when she discovered me careening toward third base with my high school \"girlfriend\""}
{"id": "t3_2wt14b", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Trying to help a friend [M21] deal with a breakup with his long time girlfriend [F20]", "post": "So my housemate and buddy has been dating his girlfriend for about 3 years now, pretty much the only girl he's ever had in his life so she's a pretty big deal, but they recently decided to go on a break because she wasn't 'feeling it' anymore.\n\nWhile they were on the 'break' he decided to go to a party for one of our friend's birthdays, and she got upset that he didn't invite her. Apparently she was so upset she decided to go out and have sex with some random dude.\n\nShe admitted to doing it right after and she's apparently very apologetic about it, but the whole situation's got my buddy pretty torn up. He can't decide if it's worth ending everything they have over this, and he also blames himself for not inviting her to the part initially, which isn't very good for him IMO.\n\nNow I know this sub is usually for people directly dealing with issues like this, and I definitely don't have as many details as you guys might like, but I really suck at helping people out with stuff like this and he's coming to me to talk about it. Anyone got any advice for a friend trying to help another friend deal with something like this?", "summary": "trying to help a good friend deal with a break-up, suck with this kind of stuff, wondering if there's anything I can say that might do any good."}
{"id": "t3_iawhv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need to tell a guy I've been talking to for three months that I don't want to talk anymore.", "post": "Me - 31, Him - 31. We had been going out for three months. I know him through his father. He wasn't my type but I was up for hanging out. He called me every day, and we'd talk. He was polite and gentlemanly, just not my type. He offered to pay every time we went out. Then it really annoyed me that he would go on these racist rants. I would very patiently hear him out and offer my opinion, but being black, I realized that, either way, whether hearing him out respectfully or telling him to fuck off it validated his opinion. Every date has ended with a hug and expressed interest in hanging out again. Yet he has never kissed me or expressed further interest other than calling me every day. He was also evasive when it came to him meeting my friends/family and vice versa.\n\nThen I meet another guy (35 y.o.), who is everything I've ever dreamed of and more. He's really smart and accomplished, and he is crazy about me. I don't like to juggle guys, so the first guy I just stopped talking to. It was unclear what we were doing (he gladly pays for dinner yet doesn't make a move) and he seems socially inept. It's been a while since I last talked to guy #1, but he keeps texting, writing and calling. He says he misses talking to and hanging out with me. I'm not even interested in being his friend.\n\nToday I blocked him on FB. But I want to give him a verbal message that it's over. What do I say?", "summary": "How do I express to a guy who was interested in me, but never made a move, that I am no longer interested in communicating or hanging out?"}
{"id": "t3_14rr3d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What should I do when I am ready to \"settle down\", but my very compatible boyfriend is not? (25 and 30)", "post": "Me (female): 30\nPartner (male): 25\nLength of Relationship: 1 Year\n\nSo me and this man have been seeing each other, consistently, for a year now. When we are together, we are very very happy and we are very compatible in every way. I love spending as much time with him as possible, sleeping with him at night, waking up in the morning with him, making meals together, and sharing resources. I very much want to live with him eventually and wake up with him every day.\n\nHowever, as it stands, I don't get to spend every night with him. In fact, I never know when he will be around or not. So I'll spend a night on, a night off, maybe a couple of nights in a row, and then maybe not see him except for a meal and some sex here and there for a few days. I find myself lonely, and longing for him often. And of course, I want to have a home with someone one day, and I would like it to be with him. I want to grow old with him.\n\nHowever, as far as I know, he isn't \"ready\" yet, and who knows if he ever will be? What should I do? He's told me that he doesn't want me to leave him. He's told me that he feels \"at home\" when he is with me, but I long for something more consistent. Also, I don't want to scare him off by giving him an ultimatum, but I also don't want to wait around when I could potentially be having an awesome relationship with a guy who is absolutely certain he wants to have the kind of future with me.\n\nSo what should I do? Do guys normally take such a long time to feel like they want that with a girl? Have any of you \"waited\" for someone in a similar manner, and had it pay off? I've never been in a relationship, at any age, where a guy didn't want to share his home with me and sleep with me every night he possibly can.\n\nThanks for your answers.", "summary": "I want to share a home with my boyfriend, but he isn't \"ready\" yet. Not sure if I should wait or cut my losses."}
{"id": "t3_3ggfxa", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "I need a little help or advice", "post": "So for some back story I am moving in with a few friends of mine. One of them and his family previously lived in a home with 3 bedrooms and an office. My friend and I thought I would be great to get 2 of our co workers to move in to make the payments possible. Well I don't make too much money and my friend said I would only have to pay 600$ a month of the 2700$. Because I get the office. Which has no doors. No closet and is the smallest room. He agreed to pay extra cause he wanted to master bedroom. Now he is taking his word back and saying I have to pay 700. But I think it is unfair cause everyone else gets their own closet and door to their room which are actually down the hall away from the noise. My room is right next to the noise and front door too. I know 100$ doesn't seem like much. But it would really help me out on making the rent cause I am going to school and working this semester too. What is a polite of saying. If I don't get the 600. I will be moving back home the next month.", "summary": "Moving out for first time. Friend said I could pay less. Now is changing his mind cause he is secretly very cheap. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_paeab", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How do I justify whether I should call the landlord to complain about my neighbors?", "post": "I live in a small Apartment building, and I also work the midnight shift, so I sleep during the day. My Neighbors (in my own opinion) make A lot of noise. However, since I sleep during the day, and or sometimes afternoon. I have been on this schedule for quite a while and really have no perspective on whether this is normal \"day time\" noise, or obnoxious and extreme. \nI should also mention that, in lieu of being just a tatletale, I HAVE considered talking to them, but on the few occasions I have run into them outside they have made it clear in no uncertain terms that they want nothing to do with me, and won't make an attempt to be nice. (i.e ignoring my greetings, and moving into the house if I come out for a cigarette, or too sit on the porch and read a book.)", "summary": "How do I decide if my neighbors are being overly loud, or if I am just being bitchy because I sleep during the day?"}
{"id": "t3_3xs7gg", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My girlfriend[21/F] gets incredibly jealous and self-concious if I[25/M] speak too enthusiastically about other people, including celebrities.", "post": "I love my girlfriend deeply. We're heavily compatible when it comes to our interests, sense of humor, etc... But she has a very difficult problem with her self-esteem and body image ever since overcoming an eating disorder. She constantly puts herself down, calling her self ugly or fat (she is neither) and she is inconsolable about it. I tell her she's beautiful all the time but she doesn't remember those times when she gets upset.\n\nNow a particular problem I've been struggling with is her getting into jealous fits when I speak too enthusiastically (from her perspective) about other women. For instance, I recently started a new job and got a long very well with my new female boss, I tell my girlfriend this and she gets upset, suggesting I already have feelings for her (I do not). This is a daily pattern that is starting to take its toll on our relationship. I would understand her concern if I were constantly talking about how cool someone is, but it isn't constant and I am not always talking about people in that manner. I have relayed stories from work that only tangentially involve my boss and she still gets the same way. \n\nHer reaction is not limited to people we know or even real people. If i show interest in a female singer, like legitimately enjoying her music, I get the same reaction. I cannot tell her I enjoy a song if it's sung by a female. I cannot talk about actresses without her comparing herself too the, or really, comparing my interest in them to my interest in her. Which is not the same thing. This problem even arose when I talked at length about pin-up girl tattoos, an Idea she liked and I intended to get one, but apparently I spoke too enthusiastically for too long about the fictional drawings of women. \n\nI really like having in depth conversations about movies and music and have not been able to have them with her because I may talk about a certain actress or singer in a way that makes her think I hold them in a higher regard than her. And I do everything I can to make my girlfriend feel special and beautiful, but she doesn't remember that when she gets into fits like this.", "summary": "My girlfriend gets into fits of jealousy and self-consciousness If I speak about women, celebrities and musicians too positively."}
{"id": "t3_39lz7q", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [37F], I'm always the butt of my family's jokes.", "post": "I have a tight I knit family, we all get along well and usually meet a few times a month for dinner or drinks. We like to joke and banter a lot, but over the last few months I guess I've felt ganged up on as I seem to be the constant target of their teasing.\n\nWhat can I do about it? It's gotten to the point where I don't really want to hang out with them so much anymore. Is it a case of talking to them individually or should I say something to them as a group? It's mostly my siblings as opposed to my parents, but sometimes it's embarassing when other people from outside the family notice. \n\nI don't have a quick wit, but I do have a good sense of humour and am able to laugh at myself. So I never really do anything but laugh along, they don't get much of a reaction out of me.", "summary": "My family like to tease each other, and lately they are all ganging up and teasing me exclusively. I laugh along, but it makes me feel bad at this point. How do I approach it?"}
{"id": "t3_35xf9d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is my (22f) girlfriend too old for me (19m)", "post": "We have been dating long distance four and a half months, she is my first actual girlfriend. She was in two other relationships before she met me, we had a pretty long discussion that lasted a month about these previous relationships. \nWe see eachother once every three weeks for 2-4 days at a time, the sex is really good. Dating long distance is tough, and I miss her everyday, but I feel like things will get easier when we get to see each other more often. Sometimes I randomly start to think about her past, and it bothers me. I don't think about her past as often as I used to, I think it's unhealthy.\nI know I mean everything to her, and she seems worried that I am going to break up with her, I've reassured her the few times its been brought up that isn't the case. What should I do?", "summary": "girlfriend is three years older then me and has been in previous relationships, sometimes I feel like she is too old for me."}
{"id": "t3_1dbecf", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (almost) Boyfriend (18) asked another girl to prom without saying anything to me(f17)", "post": "The guy I really like (m18) asked another girl to go to prom with him without saying anything to me(f17). I had told him weeks earlier that I really wanted him to ask me. And I left it at that. a couple of weeks later I asked him if he was going to ask me or not because I need to know if I can get a dress. That's when he told me He had already asked someone to his prom. He then said we can go to my prom which was in just under a week. We ended up going and I had an amazing time, but now I'm left with the feeling that some other girl will get to be all over him. and I want to ask him just what happened. Like if he asked her before I had said anything. Or just what exactly happened. But I'm not quite sure how to take this, or even approach him in this.", "summary": "the guy whom I share mutual romantic affections for, asked someone else to his senior prom without said anything to me."}
{"id": "t3_pb3tr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Cheating - how best to handle it.", "post": "First off, the data: \n\nI'm 23, female. He's 29.  We met in the fall of 2010, and I decided that I wanted to date him by January 2011.  We started dating officially in July, building naturally from a close friendship - so I guess that puts us at around 7 months technically.\n\nThe situation:\n\nHe cheated on me, with his ex-girlfriend.\n\n A lot of people are likely saying 'that soon?? Get out now', but considering context and such I think we can work through it. I am keeping an open mind to all possibilities though. \n\n There's a bit of back story to this, but I'm mostly just wondering if anyone with experience can chime in, give some advice or anecdotes.  Whether from cheaters, the cheated on, or just someone with an opinion.  I'm happy to answer questions and provide more details as needed. Ideas on how it works, how you handled it before, lingering feelings or thoughts you wish you'd tabled right at the beginning, how you dealt with it in your own life... all are welcome.\n\n I am taking several days to be certain of a course of action, so no hasty responses required.  Thanks, Redditors.", "summary": "He cheated on me with an ex, now what? Or, what steps (other than a simple 'dump him') would be wise? "}
{"id": "t3_42uffr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25F] felt an urge to kiss my coworker [25M] tonight. Except I have a bf of 2 years", "post": "I'll keep this as short as possible. \n\nI had a terrible day today and needed to go out with friends. My coworker, who I socialize with outside of work often and consider a friend, invited me out with him and his friends. \n\nI went, had a few (three) beers. About beer two my friend and I were talking, and I got that weird urge to just kiss him. This was not a romantic situation, we were not talking about romantic things. He's hinted in the past that he's been in to me, but has always always respected my relationship. I've been with my boyfriend for two years, and love him deeply. \n\nI immediately freaked out and went to the toilet. I then removed myself to the other side of the table and talked to other people for the rest of the evening. I did not kiss him, nor did I mention to him that I thought of it. \n\nI'm just freaked out. What was that? My boyfriend and I are long distance, and I only see him a few times a month, so I thought that perhaps it was just me wanting attention. I've never been attracted to my friend, and have never thought of kissing him before. Should I be concerned, or is this just my emotions being weird at the end of a trying day?", "summary": "thought of kissing completely platonic friend (coworker) when we were at a bar after a long day. Freaked out and am now really confused as to what that was about."}
{"id": "t3_jig14", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Would cutting contact be a good idea or should I stay friends with (F) co-worker. Stuck in a weird situation and not sure what to do.", "post": "I'm a 27 year old male and work at a store with a 19 year old female. Over the past few months, she's been very flirty to me specifically but I did not express any interest in her at first due to the age gap. She would find ways to team up with me on projects and we would be together every day at work until all the co-workers just assumed there was something going on between us but neither of us addressed it. \n\nI am starting to like her but don't know what to do. She texts me a lot and we chat on skype, mostly just joking around and flirty shit. I'm pretty sure she has a thing for me from the hints she's dropped but I'm also pretty sure she has a boyfriend but whenever I try to bring it up she changes the subject or vaguely says he's a friend. \n\nA few days ago I saw her randomly with a guy holding hands. She didn't see me and later she texted me asking something and I replied and asked what the did that day. She said something along the lines of \"just hung out with a friend shopping\". Now I'm stuck in a weird situation where I'm not sure what's happening. I'm still having reservations about the age gap so this might be a good thing. Should I not pursue anything? Cut contact? (difficult...we work together and everyone there sorta knows what's happening so they usually team us up anyway) Stay just friends? She doesn't seem to be the type of person who would cheat but then again...I've only known her 4 or 5 months and have been serious friends 2 or 3 months so I wouldn't say I know her TOO well. Sorry for the rambling post. sorta drunk...", "summary": "Falling for co-worker who might already have a possible boyfriend. Hard to cut all contact since we work together. What to do?"}
{"id": "t3_1baie4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [23M] girlfriend [22F] of 4 years became a born again virgin", "post": "Hey guys\n\nI'm an agnostic atheist and my girlfriend is a Protestant Christian. We've been together nearly 4 years. I am going to be attending grad school and she is in undergraduate school. We have lived together for a year and we're pretty boring people. We're both introverts and have had maybe two fights through the duration of our relationship. I'm flexible and she's flexible. There has been no cheating or jealousy feuds. Sex maybe once per 1.5 weeks on average. You can said we are 'content' or 'happy.' We're best friends.\n\nAround Christmas time last year a member of her close family died and she's really starting to develop her relationship with God. I've noticed her becoming more distant and I suspected it's because she's re-evaluating what she wants in a partner and in life. We've had a talk before about Christianity. She wants a Christian husband with Christian values (all of which are the same of mine; I was raised Catholic/Protestant). It's important for her partner to be Christian because it has something to do with purity of marriage and how that helps you build a closer relationship to God. She wants to better serve God in any way she can. I respect her views and her motives. I went to church with her last weekend.\n\nAbout two weeks ago when I was kissing her before bed she said that she doesn't want to have sex out of marriage anymore and that doing it makes her feel guilty. I'm flexible, but this one is definitely a curve-ball. We've talked about marriage and agree that we're far too young, and want to wait until we are 28-29 years old to get married. 6 Years is a long time without sex. She's okay with that wait. Sex is important to me because I believe that it creates and shows love and also it's fun. I just don't believe you have to get married to do it. \n\nIt might be easy for you to type \"just break up,\" but if you haven't built something for 4 years, it's a little more difficult to understand why this isn't easy especially because we're good friends in good standing.\n\nAnyone have any insight?", "summary": "Girlfriend and I have a major incompatibility with partner beliefs and sex. I want sex outside of marriage and she wants a Christian husband."}
{"id": "t3_e2qox", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm a little uneasy about the number of sexual partners my girlfriend has had.  Am I being dumb?", "post": "So my girlfriend and I have been together for about 6 months, we are both 21 years old.  The relationship has been awesome, we have had minor differences but no huge fights.  I know that we are still a fairly young couple, but bear with me.  I'm not a very promiscuous guy (I've slept with only one other person before my current girlfriend, and the other person was a girl who I dated for a year).  Basically, I don't really sleep around.  This weekend, for some reason, I asked my girlfriend for the first time how many guys she has slept with. She told me I was the 9th guy. I was expecting around 3 or 4.  To me, she doesn't seem to be the type of girl who sleeps around (I don't even know if 9 guys qualifies as sleeping around).  Even in our relationship, being comfortable sexually is something we have had to work on.  That's why I was kind of shocked when she told me I was the 9th guy she's slept with.  She told me that she used to view sex as not very meaningful, but that it is very different with me.  She's told me numerous times that I mean a lot more to her than any other guys ever have.  I'm not mad at her, because I know that I can't be mad at her for doing stuff before we even knew each other.  I'm just a little uneasy/put off by the number of guys she's been with.  Am I being stupid for feeling like this?  My apologies for the big block of text, I don't really know how to format these posts well.", "summary": "I've slept with 1 other person, my girlfriend has slept with 8 other people, and I feel weird about it.  Am I being dumb?"}
{"id": "t3_3e53hw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] with my boyfriend [17 M] going out for 4 weeks and are crazy for each other, then suddenly cuts it off for seemingly no reason.", "post": "So me and this guy have been going out for a few weeks, and we were both as happy as could be. We were always talking, and when we were together it was amazing. We were so grateful for each other. \n\nThe other day I was over to his place, and we were alone. We were just cuddled up on the couch and we were having a great time. Then his mother comes home without warning, and we scatter (this was low-key). \n\nI'm pretty sure she caught a glimpse of us together, then he went upstairs for about 10 minutes and comes back down and takes me home, and I thought nothing of it. On the way, he says we should take a bit of a break, and I thought okay, it was a close call, I get it. \n\nThen today he breaks up with me. I was blindsided. This is very sudden and I'm confused and angry (not at him) and crushed. He said he just doesn't feel the same way about me but still want's to be good friends. \n\nHow can someone go from wanting to never let go to not interested in 24 hours? I'm just so confused, I wish I knew what was really happening. What do you guys think?", "summary": "Boyfriend who was crazy for me broke up with me after his mom came home and possibly caught us in 24 hours. He went upstairs to talk I guess and now we're back to friends and I'm feeling crushed and very confused."}
{"id": "t3_3trl1x", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Have you ever decided to end a friendship with a best friend?", "post": "Thank you in advance for taking the time to read my post. I'm a 23-year-old male and I'm considering ending a relationship with my best friend of 5 years.\n\nI finally forced myself to see her for the massively narcissistic, attention seeking person she really is - and how I've always been a punching bag for her emotions in this unhealthy friendship.\n\nLast week, I told her that I will be renewing my work license in New York (I live in Philadelphia) for two days during my day-off when we were talking about work; out of nowhere, she mentioned \"I guess you don't miss and want to visit your friend in California afterall\". I just don't understand why she always takes my words out of context in order to make me feel guilty and be manipulated by her. When I was talking to my family when she was calling, she left a message saying \"I won't bother you by calling anymore if you're busy\".\n\nWhat would you do in my situation? I just don't know what to do anymore. I will miss her very much. But I won't miss the friendship. I won't miss the friendship at all.", "summary": "! Know my best friend for 5 years / she always tried to take things out of context all the time to make me feel guilty. Considering ending a relationship."}
{"id": "t3_1091hv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Last night out at a bar and my friends and I decided to teach my friend cockblocking is not cool. People of reddit have you ever cockblocked a friend to teach them a lesson.", "post": "So me and my roommates were at a bar, our friend who sulks and cockblocks everyone's night whenever he doesn't have a girl to talk with or do anything with and has ruined each one of our nights on separate occasions many a times by telling girls \"did you tell her about your son\" \"dude are you even gonna call this one tomorrow\" or \"wow she looks just like your ex someone's got issues\" was with us. So he found a girl and was talking, joking, and hitting it off with. So we all decided to cockblock him just to show him how it felt. So I run back to our place have my friends call me and give me updates. I photoshop some pictures of my ex-girlfriend to show just them, put them in his frames on his bed, grab a bottle of lotion throw it on his bed, put balled up tissue all around his bed near the picture frames, print out abortion  brochures and put them in his room. All the while my friends at the bar are dropping subtle hints to her about \"how good it is to see him out having a good time\" how \"this is really helping him move forward\" \"he really needs something like this\". I called my ex who lived down the street and hated him come by and wait for the right time in my room. They come back go into his room we're all on the couch and after a few minutes we hear him tell her \"no none of this is mine, she's not my girlfriend\"  \"I've never made a girl get an abortion\" i grab my ex and tell her to start banging on the front door  and call \"mike a coward\" \"a pro-choicer\" \"and the least he could do is pay for the abortion like he promised\" needless to say the girl storms out of the place, he runs after her, he comes back in and we all start busting up laughing he gets pissed slams his door and finally lightens up the next day about it.", "summary": "got some payback on a cockblocking friend through creative photoshop and careful planning essentially cockblocking him to show him he reaps what he sows."}
{"id": "t3_jlaj0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "A Facebook Business Page I Run Just Got Shat Upon By An Unhappy Customer and All Their Friends. What Is The Best Course of Action?", "post": "I work in a small retail store and run the store's facebook page. Earlier today we had an incredibly unsatisfied customer who has proceeded to trash our business, our owner and our staff on the internet. And they got a bunch of their friends to do the same. Would it be best to remove these post and block the users or address it in a different way? I fear just removing the post and blocking the users may make it worse, but I don't want to allow these exaggerated claims stay on our page. \n\nIt sucks because I was not in the store the past few days so I have no idea what really happened, but from what I can gather, two people SOMEHOW (big mistake on one of the staff's part) put the same item on hold (which only last 24hrs) and when one of them came back to buy it, the other got incredibly infuriated. The person who ended up not getting the item apparently had put the item on hold one day, came back the next day and put it on hold again (which is a mistake an employee made when they allowed this; this is NOT our store policy to allow this). This created confusion, yadda yadda yadda, now my facebook page looks like a hate speech convention. \n\nHelp me Reddit-wan-Kenobi, you're my only hope.", "summary": "Customer and all their friends shat on my business page on fb, most likely do to an employee promising something they shouldn't have. How do I clean up this mess?"}
{"id": "t3_3wdcka", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [25M] really like this girl [21F] I've known for only two week-ish. Am I taking things too fast?", "post": "Some of you might recognize my name, here is my latest post: \n\nAnyhow, some sort of an", "summary": "I really like this girl after the first date. I want to move further and be more than friends. What's the best way to do it? Am I going too fast?"}
{"id": "t3_l3u70", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So I might have spinal meningitis.", "post": "Today I got a call from my boss telling me that one of my co-workers is in the hospital with spinal meningitis. We don't know yet if it's bacterial or viral, seeing as how the spinal tap will take at least 24 hours before we get any clear results. I've been vaccinated for it but when I talked to the doctors office they told me that there is now another vaccine that you are supposed to have.\nThey told me to watch for the symptoms which include a severe headache and flu like symptoms along with back/neck ache. When I asked how long the virus lays dormant in your system, they told me either a month to a week. Well I have definitely been working with her over the past month, and my recent contact with her was just last weekend. \nNow this evening I have a severe migraine and some slight neck ache but haven't gotten sick to my stomach at all. In my town there have already been three cases in just today, one of the patients is dying. I'm a bit scared reddit, I've been around my newborn niece and my younger siblings and I don't want anything to happen to them. Any advice or reassurance that I'm just stressing myself out and to relax until the results come back would be appreciated.", "summary": "Co-worker has spinal meningitis, may possibly be bacterial. Been working with her for the past month and I've been around very young children and am scared for their safety and mine."}
{"id": "t3_25hid1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Girlfriend [F/22] won't tell me she loves me [M/24] in native language", "post": "She speaks Spanish natively, but my Spanish is terrible so we almost always communicate in English. Anyway, I noticed a while ago that she never said she loved me in Spanish. I didn't think anything of it at first, until I realized she was consciously avoiding doing so. If I tell her I love her in Spanish, she'll respond in English, 100% of the time--little things like that. \n\nIt made me feel a little weird, so I asked her about it and she dodged the question. That made me feel weirder. I let it sit but asked again last night and she again dodged/ignored the question. I haven't pushed the issue at all, but it's been on my mind and I don't understand it.\n\nOverall, I feel petty and paranoid, but also uncomfortable and awkward about this. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little worried that she isn't being honest with me about her feelings. I think the awkwardness is exacerbated greatly by the fact that she doesn't respond to any questions about it, which just leaves my mind to theorize on its own.", "summary": "Girlfriend won't say she loves me or variations thereof in her native language, won't respond to questions about why. This causes me to question her feelings for me. How should I be reacting? Is this nothing but childish paranoia?"}
{"id": "t3_3r1rzl", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (M18) don't drink and it's a taboo here.", "post": "Disclaimer: Well I don't know if this is the correct subreddit for this but I honestly don't know where to post this so I apologize if it's in the wrong place. Please don't attack me for this. Thank you.\n\nWell I'm currently a college student in a big college party city and I'm just not into alcohol. It seems to be such a taboo to the point where I have arguments with my girlfriend (F18) about it. \n\nI am majoring in business and I plan on doing business in Far East Asia, specifically China and I keep getting told I'm going to need to drink if I'm going to be a business major. \n\nI just don't want to drink. Nothing is wrong with alcohol, I just don't want to do it. I can't seem to pinpoint why though but I know I don't want to do it. Beer is the only thing I've tried and I plainly don't like it.\n\nI don't like partying because it's basically drinking around these parts.\n\nI don't know what to do with myself because I feel like I'm going to be a terrible businessman and I feel like I'm a partypooper to everyone around me. \n\nI especially feel bad when my girlfriend says it irks her when I don't give her a reason.", "summary": "I don't want to drink alcohol and it seems like such a taboo thing that I don't. Girlfriend doesn't like that I don't drink for no reason. I don't know what to say or do."}
{"id": "t3_1691q4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Found BF's homemade video of him fapping which he emailed to himself... what's that about??", "post": "Well, I've been on reddit for a few years, have another account, but felt it necessary to make a throwaway here as my BF is also a redditor. I (female) have a BF (male) of over two years (both of us are 28), and we're pretty much in it for the long haul now, talked about marriage and kids and plan to move in together this year. He borrowed my computer a couple weeks ago to check his email and other things (he was at my place and didn't have his comp with him). When he left, he obviously accidentally left his email open. Just before signing him out (which I would of course do, as I have no reason to look through his email), I saw something odd...an email he had recently sent to himself with no subject. I don't know what I was thinking, but I opened it...I just had a weird feeling. In the email was a video he made of himself masturbating in his bathroom. He obviously shot the video with his iphone and emailed it to himself. It didn't show his face, just his body, and him rubbing one out. I checked quickly to see if he had sent it to anyone (wouldn't you at this point?), and he had not..well, not that I know of. If he had sent it to someone or done something with it, there was no evidence of this. Just a random video of him fapping that he emailed himself. \n\nI'm not jumping to any conclusions, I just want to know from the guys, what does this mean and why might he do this? Would he only do this with the intention of sending or posting it somewhere? Do I need to be concerned? Should I address this with him, and how so?", "summary": "Found random video that my boyfriend made on his iPhone of him fapping, which he emailed to himself. Why would he do this?"}
{"id": "t3_1ihwzn", "subreddit": "Dogtraining", "title": "Best walks when on a choke chain: dog isn't being choked, but is it bringing up bad memories?", "post": "My 3 year old GSD x Husky rescue stayed with some relatives for a few days while my boyfriend and I moved house, and the relatives found an old choke chain to walk him with, instead of his Mekuti harness. We have had real problems with him pulling on the lead, and the Mekuti harness has worked wonders, but didn't eliminate the problem. He hasn't pulled when on the choke chain at all, even when it was first put on apparently, so we think that is what he was trained on (and damage from that process is probably why his barks and whines sound a bit odd). We now think the people who had him before us were violent towards him (if you mime kicking he runs across the room terrified), so, my question is: he is best behaved on walks when wearing a choke chain, and it isn't hurting him at all, but will the harm chokers and the people using them caused him in the past affect him in any way now? I 100% DO NOT want to use a choke chain on him and I don't think anyone should ever, ever train a dog that way, but this chain is the only lead we've used that has completely solved the problem with him pulling, and he hasn't seemed stressed out by it. If he ever started pulling on the lead so that the choker was tight, I would stop using it straight away. The last thing I want is my dog being hurt. If I'd known these relatives were going to put one on him, I wouldn't have let them look after him. Still, it works and doesn't hurt him, my only worry is it'll do psychological damage somehow.", "summary": "Presence of choke chain makes walks much easier without ever choking, harming or stressing out my dog, but is it bringing back bad memories from his previous owners?"}
{"id": "t3_3gybxh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by becoming a neurotic med student's \"fixer project\"", "post": "So I'm a hedonist or rather a complete trainwreck; I'm a college dropout who went into mediocrity for the simplicity it offered (also a variety of drug related convictions, chiefly opiate related) and live in a \"rapidly gentrifying neighborhood\" (shady, sketchy and shitty) near a medical college. I'm 22, I've been living in a three apartment townhouse for 3 years, every year around June the leases expire and new leasers occupy the other two apartments; I generally don't pay attention as my landlord is a slum lord and we have a mutual desire to be left the fuck alone; my life constitutes of working and getting high at home, life passes me by. Anyway about two weeks ago I nodded off in front of my apartment's door and I wake up being observed by this Indian chick who woke me up, got me inside and layed me on my side. Sweet girl, didn't call an ambulance, so she was alright in my book. Only now she's around an uncomfortable amount of time, surpassing the neighborly and creeping into the maternal. I wasn't aware until she attempted to lay out a two year \"self renovation\" plan for me a few hours ago. Now I'm not entirely sober currently so I'll update come morning when I'm not nodding off but I had a college catalog shoved in my face, she had a alarmingly detailed journal of sorts with my details and called my current profession (welder/machinist/professional junkie) as a \"phase.\" I thought it was kinda cool having a little assistant/secretary to manage my affairs; it just hit me a bit ago that normal people don't buy you clean syringes and amazon prime you micron filter syringe attachments; she taught me the safest way to make a morphine solution from a tablet, that's mental, she's mental.", "summary": "turns out I've been encouraging someone who's batshit insane with most of my day to day decisions for the last two weeks."}
{"id": "t3_4px55f", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by pouring piss all over myself", "post": "It literally just happened 5 minutes ago. I don't feel good.\nA bit of backstory here. Sometimes while staying up late I would need to use the bathroom. My parents always grill me about why I'm using the bathroom and get super suspicious of what I'm doing every time and it gets on my nerves, so I turned to the ever so elegant solution of using ziplock bags to piss it, sealing them and pouring the piss out next morning down the drain and throwing the bag away. Efficient? No. Unethical? Yes. One night (the night of this post) I needed to use the bathroom. Now next to my bed is a little cardboard storage box filled with things like magazines, books, hats and you guessed it, empty ziplock bags. Now I was being a cheap ass so it was filled with old ziplock bags because the day prior, I was exchanging coins at the local coinstar machine and I like my coins sorted. Anyways I pulled out my plastic bag and began to piss in it. When finished, I would put the bag on the other side of the bed, just incase people walk in and see a bag of piss. Not the best sight. I was moving it over my bed and I felt something warm. At first I thought it was just the piss or something and then I realized a wet sensation on my body and could finally hear dripping noises. Turns out the bag had a small hole in it. So I was panicking, piss being sloshed all over my bed, floor and of course, me, when I managed to stuff the piss filled plastic bag into another ziplock bag. When moving it over again, I realized that same wet-warm feeling. Turns out, THIS bag had a hole as well. More piss everywhere. Yay. After finding a bag that DIDN'T have a hole and putting the first and second bag in there, my bed looked and felt as if I pissed my self and my floor looked as if I took a water gun and went Rambo. My upper body was also covered in piss as well. I'm going to clean this mess up in the morning and just sleep in my desk chair.", "summary": "Pissed in a bag in bed and tried to move it over me. Didn't know the bag had a hole until it was too late."}
{"id": "t3_2i0hcq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with my boyfriend [27M] , how to talk about problems/ issues constructively", "post": "I was always taught that if you don't like something you speak up and if things change then great, if they don't then either you learn to accept it or move on.\n\nWell my boyfriend is almost the exact opposite way. He'll only speak up if it is incredibly annoying to him. He says he learned to just accept that sometimes the way things are is the way things are and trying to change something if it is only a minor annoyance isn't always helpful.\n\nWe've only ever had one serious discussion (we've been together for less than 6 months) and it was about something he said sounded almost coercive and I had been in an emotionally abusive relationship in the past so I've learned to watch for signs. We had our discussion, like two hours long, where we talked it out. At first there were cases of interrupting in the discussion but I was firm and said that if he is talking I'll be quiet and vice versa (that we will wait for the other to finish speaking). At one point I felt like I wasn't being understood and I basically said everything as bluntly as possible and he finally understood what my problem was and he apologized for what he said and how it came off and specifically said, without my prompting, that if he ever coerced me in anyway that I should leave him flat out because I deserve better (basically a big plus in my book). (a preview of our \"argument style\".)\n\nMy big thing though is that he doesn't speak up on these small annoyances and I can tell that he's annoyed sometimes but if I ask him then he gets more annoyed because he basically says that it's something he can deal with. I'm not used to this \"confrontation\" style and am wondering about how to handle it when I come from such a brutally honest family. \n\nI don't want our communication styles to be an issue later on.\n\nAnd if it's something small then I'll wait til we are alone and speak up saying I don't like it when you do this, I feel this way (doing that psych stuff where you speak about I things) ... sadly can't remember any of the old talks.", "summary": "boyfriend handles small annoyances by shoving them under the rug. me: I'm open about it, speak my mind, if nothing changes then I either accept or move on. Advice on how to mesh these two confrontation styles."}
{"id": "t3_4w53ue", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23 M] can't get past my long distance partner [29 F] sleeping with someone else 3 days before I arrived to see them. It was a sort-of-open/not official relationship", "post": "She was in my country backpacking, she approached me after a lot of time spent interested (we worked nearby) and we started casually seeing each other. \n\nI have never been interested in a relationship and she was much more invested than she let on. She flew back a few months after leaving because she wanted to see me again, but not letting on I was hugely important in this decision.\n\nAfter she left again, she soon sent me tickets to see her in her home country. It wasn't until this point that I got the hint and realised she was a bit serious, so I stopped seeing anyone casually and waited until I got there.\n\nI was under the impression she would too, but I found out (while I was there) that she had been seeing someone quite intimately for a couple of weeks, and (she told me after I left for home) the last she saw him was only three days before I arrived. \n\nShe told me she cut him off completely and has no interest in him anymore, and I believe her.. But I feel cheated and gross for not knowing this before hand. It's an awful feeling that she was sleeping with someone so shortly before I was there. We've spoken about it at length, but I still can't let go of that shitty feeling.\nShe says it was because she was emotionally lost and didn't know if I even cared about her, and thought I might also be sleeping with other people before I got there.\n\nI adore this girl, and she means an awful lot to me, and I clearly mean an awful lot to her. She regrets what happened immensely.. But I still feel like shit about how close it was to me arriving to see her, like it was disrespectful and shouldn't need a conversation to be known not to do. What the fuck do I do, am I overreacting?", "summary": "girl slept with someone shortly before I saw her on the other side of the world and I can't get past it in my head"}
{"id": "t3_4unm4z", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "[Help] Dog is over \"Ideal weight\" but ribs are still visible?", "post": "We rescued a Staffordshire Bull Terrier from a shelter ~6 months ago, when we got her she had a broken leg and was visibly skinny. 6 Months later she has put a lot of weight on and is a very energetic young dog (she is approx. 11 months old now) however, while searching online i find the ideal weight for bitches of her breed is 10~16kg, she weighs 16.5kg and her ribs are still *just* visible when you look at her. She gets fed 454g of raw minced beef  per day and a handful of \"WainWrights\" dog kibble (not a cheap brand, but certainly not the best) per meal (2 meals per day), she also gets small portions of veg and gravy once a week when we have our Sunday roast dinner. Should i be able to make out the lines of her rib-cage when she is stood, I have been assuming this means she is still slightly underweight? I often vigorously play tug with her and she has become noticeably stronger since we got her and I believe it looks like she has packed on a lot of muscle which could account for the weight gain i guess?", "summary": "Dog is over the ideal weight for its breed, but ribs are still faintly but easily noticeably visible when standing at rest. Is this okay, or should I up her daily feed?"}
{"id": "t3_myxz8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, do you have any (non-cheating) advice for someone who suffers from anxiety and has to take a polygraph test for a job?", "post": "I've been offered a job on the condition that I pass a background check and polygraph test.  I have had anxiety since I was in my teens and I am afraid I will over think the questions and somehow convince myself that I am lying.  I have some skeletons in my closet that I intend to be truthful about but I am extremely concerned that my anxiety will cause me to fail the test.  I don't want to cheat, I just want to do the best I can and hope that my honest answers still land me the job.  That being said, I can't seem to get my mind to give a simple \"yes\" or \"no\" to a question without going into a dialogue with myself about how I -might- actually be lying.\n\nI'm really in need of some advice here.  This job would mean the world to me- it's pretty much my dream job.  I can live with not getting the job if they don't like my honest answers, but I'm going to be devastated if I don't get it because they think I'm a liar.", "summary": "I'm afraid I will over think questions and convince myself that I might be lying, even if I'm not, causing me to fail the test."}
{"id": "t3_2hsoc8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (28f) think he (28m) is going to end it just because I was too touchy in public with him. Any way I can save this?", "post": "We've been dating a month and a half. Everything was going great until last weekend. I guess I was touching him too much, according to him. I thought it was normal for new couples to have regular contact but he's from a country where men are really expected to chase the woman and the woman is expected to resist. I told him on Wednesday when we talked about it that I won't do it again, but I'm afraid the damage has been done. He went out of town this week. I did not attempt to contact him. He texted me this morning and it seemed very cold. He always calls me \"beautiful girl\" when he texts me and today he called me by my name. And he didn't give any kiss signals and it felt very unromantic. I told him I couldn't meet today (we made plans before with his roommate but i thought I should give him space) but that I could on Wednesday. I think he is going to end it. I'm just wondering how I can tell him to just relax and that it's not serious. I'm just trying to get to know his boundaries. What's my best bet? Should I be really flirty when I see him so that he feels excitement? Should I act aloof? Should I kiss him when we meet like we always have?", "summary": "Guy was freaked out by me touching him too much. I think he's going to break up with me. How can I do my best to stop it?"}
{"id": "t3_hpka6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What is your worst craigslist experience?", "post": "Mine happened very recently and would not probably compare to other people's stories but anyway, I sold a latest generation Kindle for $100 through craigslist (Los Angeles) which included a nice sleeve worth $29 bucks on Amazon. Met the buyer at a coffee shop, at a fairly busy cross-street walkable from where I work. He asked if he can get it for $90. I told him no, because the Kindle is in like-new condition plus I'm giving him the sleeve as well. He then said okay and gave me his money. He counted it in front of me, but I wasn't really paying attention (it was a little distracting since we were outside the coffeeshop and there were lots of people and cars around). So I said thank you and he went away and crossed the street. Before leaving, I decided to recount the money and noticed that this old guy only gave me $90! So I started to follow him and texted him about it, he didn't reply. I called him and saw him looked at his phone and rejected my call. He turned off his phone (or maybe he was rejecting it promptly after that). Anyway, I texted him and told him that what he did was not cool. I mean seriously, who would do shit like that for 10 dollars?! A few minutes, he started replying to me and said that I may have dropped his other ten bucks which of course was a lie. I told him I was walking behind him and saw him reject my call. He didn't say anything about that and insisted that I probably dropped the other ten. Unfortunately, I lost him in the crowd after he 'illegally' crossed the street. It also didn't help that there was a farmer's market on the next street. Anyway, I'm still shocked from this experience. I've sold many things online before and on craigslist in particular; and this is the first time something like this happened. People can be just depressing sometimes. Sorry, throwaway.", "summary": "sold a kindle 6\" for $100 with sleeve, man gave $90 in cash instead and immediately rushed away and disappeared. man denied giving the wrong amount. wtf right?"}
{"id": "t3_1dix1p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the most creative thing you could do with $350? More info and story in comments.", "post": "My wife and I have a pair of very close friends that we did a lot for (with no expectation of anything more than a thank you) about a year ago when they were getting married. We threw them a shower, I married them (thanks to the internet), and my wife recorded the whole event which we later edited nicely. They recently offered to pay for a nice dinner to repay us. We didn't want to accept but they said that wasn't an option. So they give us a card with a $350 Visa gift card in it and after several rounds of refusal it is clear that they will be offended if we decline.\n\nSo reddit, how can we use this $350 in a way that will make them proud? Some of our thoughts are to get them airbrushed shirts and souvenirs with their names on it, document every penny that we spend and make them a video, buy $350 worth of PBR and hot wings and dedicate the feat to their honor. Hit me with your most creative ideas, we really want to do more than pay for the hotel room.", "summary": "Very generous friends gave my wife and I $350, need fun ways to spend it that they would get a kick out of."}
{"id": "t3_zm7zb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I've created a very messy situation and I'm not sure what to do next. [m-19 + f-20]", "post": "Hi, so first thing's first I'm 19 nearly 20 and my girlfriend is 20 nearly 21. She's moving into her third year of University and I'm moving into my second. We've been going out since I was 14, for just over five years. \n\nBasically, I have serious doubts that she is the person I want to be with and that I found my soul mate at 14, but I do really feel like I love her. About a year and a half ago we broke up for just over a month because I felt like that, but we kept talking and didn't really ever break contact and so we decided to get back together. \n\nHere's where I did the stupid things; my parents were worried I was settling into a relationship too early, so when I got back together with my girlfriend, I didn't bother telling my parents. One and a half years later, I still haven't told them, but my girlfriend believes I have. Anyway today I told them, and they were shocked, but understanding, and said they had their suspicions, which I believe. I also believe my girlfriend questions whether I have actually told them about us.\n\nNow I have two things here really - I feel like I probably should never have got back with her, it was only the familiarity etc that bought us back together. She really loves me, and I'm not unhappy around her, but I feel like I don't want to spend my life with her, or at least shop around first, which sounds awful, but I mean I'm scared, because what if she is the one? I really feel like I've warped my head getting in a serious relationship so young. \n\nMy other thing is, do I tell her the truth? It would really crush her, but it might make her hate me a little bit, which could be easier to break up with her. \n\nI know I sound like a callous person, and I know I really fucked up, but it was honestly just one of those mistakes that carries on. There's a part of me that doesn't want to let go, just in case, but there's a part of me that really wants to explore the world, single, with different girlfriends etc.", "summary": "started serious relationship when I was 14 and having serious doubts now, on top of that I've lied to both my parents and girlfriend about the relationship."}
{"id": "t3_3egsyn", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (18M) and girlfriend (18F) my girlfriend out up a wall and i don't know what to do", "post": "i have been with my girlfriend for about a year and 3 months now and i don't know how much longer that will last. I'm in love with this girl but I've done terrible things to her. \n\nlong story short is that I'm jealous and possessive and i did not realize that this was wrong until recently she called me with the intentions to leave me. i tried molding her into something that i liked and had a problem with her talking to guys or wearing certain things out etc. \n\nshe lied our entire relationship saying that she didn't want to talk to boys or do these things that i made seem not okay. i was mentally abusive. I realize now that i put my girl through abuse and I'm repulsed by myself and saying sorry will never be enough. we talked about it and i know what is wrong with me and i know what i have to do and shes giving me a second chance but the only thing is is that she has put up a very thick and tall wall and i don't know what to do. \n\ni know that a lot of you probably have no sympathy for me and i don't blame you but if you guys could give me some advice on the matter that would be very much appreciated. Thank you", "summary": "I put my girl through a mentally abusive relationship and she put a huge wall up and i don't know what to do"}
{"id": "t3_3bbf4g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How to have conversation with my (29M) fiancee (30F) about the costs of treating a pet with cancer. [Four year relationship]", "post": "Using a throwaway for obvious reasons.\n\nMy fiancee and I have been dating for about four years and she's had a very beloved cat for around a decade. A number of years back (before we met), the cat had a nasty bout of cancer, she went into a significant amount of debt treating the cat (surgery, chemo, etc.), and miraculously the cat survived. It's now been about 4-5 years since that round of treatment. We are both in love with our furbaby.\n\nWe recently found out that the cancer has returned. The vets are running a number of diagnostic tests to evaluate the viability of various treatment options, but I'm concerned that (1) treatment will not be particularly effective and (2) we can't afford the  extreme measures my fiancee will want to pursue.\n\nWe're both currently well-paid but are in the midst of relocating to a different city and to significantly lower paying jobs (think 70% paycut). I still have a huge amount of debt (six figures) from a post-graduate degree, we have a wedding to pay for, and we'd like to buy a house in the near future. Money is tight right now.\n\nHow do I bring up the cost of treatment for the cat (evaluated against the amount of time and quality of life it's likely to bring the cat) and my related concerns without seeming completely callous? I love this cat dearly, but I'm experiencing a lot of anxiety about the sorts of expenses my fiancee may be willing to put us through, expenses we frankly can't afford.", "summary": "We have a very sick cat and cannot afford the sort of treatment finacee may wish to pursue. How do I bring this up and convey my concerns appropriately?"}
{"id": "t3_286s9w", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I have this problem. I [28 M] am nuts about my roommate [22 F]. We are really into each other, but she has a boyfriend. What should I do.", "post": "Ive been living with this girl (and two others) for 5 months and Im moving out in a few weeks.  Ive been nuts about her the entire time Ive been living here, but we have just started to hit it off in the last few weeks.\n\nLast night we went to the huge park nearby and just talked for three hours.  I otld her that if she is ever single agian Id like to see where things could go between us.  I figured that was a respectful way of saying that I want her to dump her boyfriend and date me.  Now Im at a dead end and no clue what my next move should be.", "summary": "Im been nuts about my roommate for months.  Now that Im moving out how do I get her to dump her boyfriend and give me a shot."}
{"id": "t3_4po8ib", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [33F] with my boyfriend [31M] of 6 months, I am curious about something but don't know how, or if I should, approach it with him.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for about 6 months and things are really great.  I had some trouble opening up to him at first but I'm getting better at it, and things are going really well.  \n\nThe only thing that sometimes bothers me is our sex life.  It used to be more adventurous but it seems to be a lot of the same old same old now.  We definitely don't sext anymore and it's dropped off a bit, where we have sex maybe once a week.  And he only seems to be able to finish half the time.  I don't want to ask him about it since I don't want to put pressure on him or seem like I'm bitching, but I'm kinda curious as to why it's happening. \n\nI know I shouldn't let it bother me but it's started to a little.  I want to feel like enough for him and when it happens I don't.  Also, I might add that he's incredibly lazy and also that I don't think sex is the most important part of a relationship for him.\n\nAny thoughts, especially from men or women who have been in this situation before, would be appreciated.", "summary": "My boyfriend only seems to be able to finish half the time we have sex.  Seemed like a lot more in the beginning.  Things are better than ever so I'm not sure why."}
{"id": "t3_51gjjw", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Former employer refuses to pay me for my remaining PTO after leaving. Who is right?", "post": "First off I will preface by saying I am in the US, and more specifically MA. I know many states have differing laws on this so I feel that this is important to say.\n\nSecondly, if this is the wrong sub, please let me know and I'll change it. It just seems like the best place to get some help.\n\nI had been working at my most recent job for roughly a year and change when I had to move for family reasons. Before I left I confirmed that I had about 6 days PTO unused, and according to my knowledge of the MA labor laws this is something that I have earned and therefore should be compensated for. I left assuming that I would be getting this with my final paycheck, but was surprised to find ~~that not only was~~ this not included~~, but I was paid much less than I usually am per period, despite being salaried.~~\n\nSo from my point of view, I should be entitled to the 6 days worth of PTO, ~~plus the remainder of the pay period that I was not paid for.~~\n\nMy employer does not see it that way, and claims ~~that since I only worked 4 days out of the last bi-monthly pay period, then I only earned 4 days worth and~~ that the PTO is not mine until I take it.\n\nIf it helps, this is a very small company, ~15 people, and I'd like to not burn any bridges.\n\nWhat should I do?", "summary": "Was not paid for my remaining PTO ~~and paid less than expected for last pay period despite being salaried~~, what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2zmlwq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "In a pretty emotional spot with my GF (24F) of 4 months and I (22M) need advice on how to make this peculiar situation better.", "post": "Cut to two weeks ago; I went to a bbq where the host, who we will call Jackie and her new friend, we will call her Ashley, were black out drunk, I put Ashley to bed since she was in bad shape and continued on having fun. \n\nFast forward to Tuesday, they see my GF at the bar and Ashley said I made out with her and was acting single, which isn't me at all. My GF isn't trusting me now since she asks why two girls would just say that. I called and texted people that were there with me trying to find out what happened and found out a different guy was the one who was the one who made out with Ashley after I put her to bed, which is the source that made these claims. \n\nNow my GF and I are who knows what because she said this has happened before and doesn't want the past to repeat itself as well as not looking stupid and feels different toward me and us. I know she's got her new job at a restaurant that's opening in a few days and that's her focus. I can't believe in the hurtful words she has said since maybe it's all of her stresses in her life coming out toward me. I just don't know what to do besides just wait it out.", "summary": "two girls mistakenly claimed I cheated on my GF and now my GF isn't trusting me. I'm trying to see if her stresses in her life are hindering her mindset."}
{"id": "t3_3832hu", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I [24/f] had already been thinking to break up with bf [26/m], called me this morning saying he quit his new job after 1 week, believe he is severely depressed", "post": "I have posted on here before about our relationship, I have been battling major depression for the last 6 months and finally feeling like I am coming out of it after therapy and different meds. Much of that time I wanted to break up with him, but that scared me so much because I knew I loved him deeply. I received lots of advice to not make a major life decision while I was depressed, so we stayed together. Things seemed to get better but the relationship was still rocky because I could tell my different meds were sapping away my sex drive, and even though he tried to never pressure me into sex, I knew not having sex bothered him.\n\nLast week things seemed to be looking up, I turned in my 2 weeks notice at my job I've had for a while to move into my freelance career, he finally got a job and was planning on moving out of his parents house in July.\n\nThis morning, bf calls me and tells me he quit his job after 1 week of working there. I lost my cool and started crying and asking him why and basically I know I made him feel even worse for doing it, I asked him why he couldn't just get through it, even though we both knew it would be hard. He hung up on me and we simmered down for a bit.\n\nI called him back to be supportive an apologize for how I acted even though it was too late and I'd hurt him. But now I don't know what to do bc I already had it on my mind that maybe we needed to break up to figure ourselves out. We've gone on a break before and that helped things for a bit. He also refused to do couples counseling, he thinks we can work it out ourselves.\n\nI believe he is severely depressed but doesn't know it or doesn't want to believe it. I wish he would go to the doctor and see a therapist but any time I have mentioned it he just shrugs. I'm at the end of my rope but all this hurts so much because I've never loved anyone like this before. Completely lost.", "summary": "I am depressed, want to break up, bf maybe depressed, he just quit job of 1 week, no idea what to do."}
{"id": "t3_1pjvvp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with my GF [24 M/F] of 2 years, She doesn't want a baby, but I do", "post": "About six months into the relationship we discussed having a baby in the future. She didn't want any, and I wanted at least one, but she gave in and said that she will carry one, or else I would have ended the relationship. So now we are living together after two years, and the topic comes up again. However this time, she expresses that she doesn't remember saying that, and that she doesn't want a baby. *I suspect that she just said that before because she was going through a hard time and just wanted to stall and have someone to depend on.*  \n  \nWe discussed options like surrogate and adoption (She's ok with these), but I don't trust anyone enough to be the surrogate mother, and I am not really feeling it for adoption. I know it's a bit selfish to have a biological child, but I don't want to regret it later in life. \n  \nShe says that she doesn't want to ruin her body, *but I have a feeling it's more than that because every time kids are around, she clamors about how annoying they are or such a hassle.* We are about to get a new apartment together in less than a month, and I'm trying to figure out what to do.", "summary": "GF does not want a baby, but I want at least one. Surrogate is an option, but I don't trust anyone enough. The GF expresses a disliking towards other children in public places."}
{"id": "t3_3mdgvj", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (21F) brother (24M) is self destructing. He lives far away. How can I help?", "post": "(God I hope he doesn't read Reddit) \n\nMy brother and I aren't exactly very close. We were ok when younger, but drifted as we became teenagers. Our lives have completely different paths. Up until recently, he was working up north in Canada. Then his girlfriend (of 6 years) left him a couple days ago, and it really messed with his head. He missed work, which hadn't been going well in the first place, and was fired. Now he is alone up North with nothing to do but get drunk. We talked at 8:30 AM and he was already drunk. He then got a DUI later that day. \n\nHe is coming back to live with our dad soon, but we don't know when. Dad is too busy to pick him up, and so is my Mom. So his ex is supposed to give him a ride down. I don't know the details of their breakup, but I don't really blame her for leaving. I don't think them being together in a car is a good idea. In the meantime, I'm worried for him because he is alone and getting drunk. I'm scared that he will get into a pit of despair and kill himself.\n\nWhile I don't agree with some of his life choices, he's my brother and I want to help him. I don't have a car, no money, and don't know a lot of people where I am. I don't know how I can help.", "summary": "My brother's gf left him. Now an alcoholic. How can I help him, or make sure he doesn't kill himself or get in further trouble?"}
{"id": "t3_2h35fy", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "[Serious] How do you get remotivated about something you've lost the will to do?", "post": "First time poster - I hope this is the right place to ask this.\n\nAnyways, I've been a student at a really intense prep school for the last two years. My life there's a grind - I routinely get under four hours of sleep a night, my day is completely structured from 6:30 AM to 9:30 PM, and my classes have really high expectations. I also do a lot of extracurriculars.\n\nThus far, I've managed to cope and be relatively happy. I got through two years of basically killing myself physically and mentally for a 4.0 GPA. I was super motivated to achieve.\nBut since the start of this year, I just haven't been able to keep up with this utterly crazy way of living. I'm still motivated - I want to work. But I can't. I will literally just sit in front of an assignment for hours trying to get myself to do it, but I just can't. I don't know why, but I just don't care anymore. I find it impossible to do my homework. I've tried setting timers, doing things in chunks, switching up subjects, cutting corners, giving myself rewards and breaks. But nothing works - I get my homework done, but only at 3:00 in the morning or between classes on the day it's due. This is unsustainable.\n\nMy parents tell me I'm suffering from burnout, that I can't keep doing this after two years. They're right. But the fact of the matter is I have to keep doing this, at least until college. I'm just starting Junior year, and from an academic/college resume standpoint I really can't afford to slack off. (I've already cut out extra courses and activities, so even now I'm already doing the bare minimum.)\n\nI'm also sort of disillusioned/depressed with school - the beginning of the year was tough for me both academically and emotionally. I'm not sure I've recovered from it yet.\n\nLooking around at other posts on reddit I'm starting to think I might be in the early stages of a psychosomatic breakdown.", "summary": "I've been working my ass off in school for two years, just started Junior Fall, and now I'm completely demotivated to get any work done."}
{"id": "t3_1v9dei", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [19F] going away to Europe for six weeks this year and I'm already getting crippling anxiety thinking about being away from my SO [21M]", "post": "The title pretty much says it all.\n\nI think it's sort of like, a separation anxiety type thing.\n\nI feel nauseous just thinking about being away from him for a \"long\" time. \n\nWe've been together for two years. We've never been apart for this length of time before.\n\nI'm going traveling with my dad, and we haven't always gotten along, and I am always able to turn to my SO to talk about things and he helps to calm me down, and I fear that my dad and I have a big argument whilst I'm overseas, and I won't be able to get the comfort and support I need from my SO (which isn't anyone's fault, obviously).\n\nI'm also insecure and I fear that he's going to find someone else whilst I'm gone.\n\nI would just like some advice on how to deal with this, as I obviously want to have a good time whilst I'm away instead of constantly worrying and stressing.", "summary": "I'm going to be away from my SO for six weeks. We've never been apart for this long before. I don't know how to deal with the anxiety and worry of being away from him for this period of time."}
{"id": "t3_17yvum", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me[16] and my gf [16] are trying to work things out. Is it that i still have feelings for her or not wanting to see her with anyone else that i wont break things off 100%", "post": "So my gf and I have been arguing lately, there's been TONS of drama and our parents said we couldn't be together anymore because of all of it. I was upset but i got over it and said that we cant be together anymore and that after all this was over we could come back and see if we wanted to get back together. She wasn't up for that she wanted to just ignore what our parents said and that our relationship shouldn't be affected by it. Pretty much the whole Romeo and Juliet situation about dying in the name of love and she wouldn't live if i wasnt in her life.. We tried to keep seeing each other we only could at school and never hang out or see each other. I ended up telling her the same thing again that i couldn't do it, and that we were too young to be dealing with all of that. She again didn't listen to it and wanted to date  me.. I keep going back and trying and i cant tell if it is that i still have feelings for her or i just don't want to see her with anyone else.. We did have sex with each other many times and spent as much time together as we could. For six months we spent almost every day together.. I'm just ready to either move on or fully commit to working things out.. Thank you for your time.", "summary": "GF and i are having issues I think i want to break up but dont know what i really want. I don't know if i still have feelings for her or just don't want to see her with anyone else"}
{"id": "t3_vhhds", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Newly single and just got a girl's number, now what do I do?  She's only here this weekend.", "post": "2 months ago, I (M/22) got dumped by (F/22) after a +2 year relationship.  Thanks to the expensiveness of apartments in the city, I've continued on sharing an apartment with her.  This has made getting over her very difficult, especially since most days I just want her back.\n\nLast night, she, our roommates, and I were hosting a small party with a few friends.  Afterward, four of us went out to one of our favorite bars.  There we met up with another friend, and met her new roommate and a few of that roommate's friends from home.  I hit it off with one of the friends-from-home and got her number.  Unfortunately, this girl is leaving either Sunday or Monday, I can't remember which, so I have a limited window.  Dating seems off the table.\n\nI have a party tonight I might be able to invite her to, but then I ought to invite her whole group.  Also, though the host is a good friend of mine, (a) the whole group might be too many people and (b) he wanted to have a strict dress code of business wear for this party.\n\nOther concerns, how much should I expect out of this?  If we met one night and *might* hangout for a second night, am I doing this just for a make-out?  It's been a couple years since I've been single, and I was never one for getting girls' phone numbers or hooking up before that.  Also, if we wanted privacy, there's none to be had.  She's a guest in someone's apartment and I live in my ex's living room.\n\nFinally, I absolutely want my ex back, but she has wrecked any notion of that whenever I bring it up.  Is it OK to be going for other girls when I want my ex?  Will it help me not?  (This is just something I felt like throwing on the pile.  The most pressing question is how to get as much as I can out of my limited time with this other lovely girl.)", "summary": "I haven't dated in awhile and have almost never hooked-up, but I just got a phone number from a girl who's only in town for a couple of days.  What do?"}
{"id": "t3_dqscz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "(For science geeks) So I saw a mention of cold fusion in a comment earlier...", "post": "I'm by no means an expert on quantum theory or particle physics.  However, I was wondering why Bose-Einstein condensates never get the attention they deserve when people discuss cold fusion.  In my opinion, someone should throw a lot of money at this (there's only so many labs that can produce this condensate I'm sure).  \n\nIt just seems like a perfect environment for fusing particles as all the particles are in the same quantum state, indistinguishable from one another (where attractive and repelling forces between the atoms are crucial).  Not to mention in several experiments the atoms have imploded when critical mass of the condensate is reached.  Also, some experiments have reported missing atoms after the implosion/supernova-like explosion.  Surely there is some way a condensate of this nature to be a source for many future technologies, whether it be cold fusion or atomic storage (i.e. putting lots of atoms in a singularity for storage).  I mean, I've never even heard anything close to this mentioned on the Science/Discovery channel special (and you'll NEVER hear it in the news).", "summary": "Anyone have any thoughts on the usefulness of the Bose-Einstein condensates when considering technologies such as cold fusion."}
{"id": "t3_521j0o", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my friend [27M], how can I be a good 'wingwoman'?", "post": "My friend recently moved to the city and hasn't been dating for a while. I want to go out with him and be his 'wingwoman' to help him find a special lady friend (as does he, I'm not pressing this on him).\n\nI'm in a committed long term relationship of 4.5 years, how do I go out with him in a way that he still seems approachable by other women when my SO can't come too? I worry that people will automatically assume he is my boyfriend when it is just the two of us and that will be no bueno for his chances.\n\nWhat ways can I talk him up or help him break into circles of ladies to talk to? What's the best way to excuse myself when it seems he is hitting it off with someone?\n\nI just want to be a good friend and see him happy, please send me your tips!", "summary": "I want to be a good wingwoman for my guy friend and need your tips on how to do so gracefully."}
{"id": "t3_2qxbhb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [18/f] with my ex [20/m] both attended a party last night, I feel pretty upset", "post": "In february, I went through a very hard breakup with this guy I was totally 100% in love with. He ended it by saying he loves me, but hes not in love with me and never talked to me again. It crushed me and I cried for 2 months straight. Last night we were having a party for my friend who is moving to Switzerland for a year. Somehow, he was invited and he was there. I wanted to leave immediately but I didn't want to come off weak so I stayed. He was with this girl that I've always hated, and just with her the entire night. ( They're not dating)Not my business, I don't care. \n\nHowever, he wouldn't even look at me. I've never felt so absolutely shitty to not even deserve a glance from someone that I dated for 1 year. I feel this is a really stupid and mundane thing to be upset about, but honestly I'm still not over the guy. It fucking hurt. I couldn't sleep when I got home and became increasingly upset about it. I also had multiple dreams about him and I would be lying if I said I don't miss him, but fuck I do and he just has no respect for me left. It just hurts and don't know what to do to calm down.", "summary": "saw ex at a party, he wouldn't even look at me the entire time. it just hurts and dont know what to do"}
{"id": "t3_zsbwe", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19m] am feeling more and more distant from my girlfriend/best friend [18f]", "post": "I have known this girl for about 2 years, we don't really call our periods of time together dating, but we have been living together for the past 6 months.\n\nEvery time something emotional comes up in a discussion with my friend, we make ourselves unavailable.\n\nHer modus operandi for handling stress is to \"Just move on\" and I understand where she is coming from, but when something has been coming up over and over again and I want to address it, that makes it hard. I get stuck on some things, things that are too personal to ask my friends about and things that she has made clear she does not want to discuss. I don't want to become too codependent but we should be able to talk about anything with a level tone and a clear goal, no?\n\nWhenever she has a problem with me, she will tell me I'm hurting her by doing X, etc and I ask her why or what I can do to change it, not trying to completely rely on her input but since she brought it up I want a good starting point, usually she will then nix the conversation and I am then at a complete loss... Silence follows because I want to be able to address the issue she brought up but I can't. The few times where she has continued to talk she either melts down by crying or melts down by yelling.\n\nWe are living together, we are both trying to find work, and we have until the end of this month to figure out an income situation or we are on the streets. I am tired of hurting her when we should be focusing on the present, but whenever I am in a good mood she constantly asks me if I am ok, and I reassure her to just be here now, if anything changes I'll let you know, everything is positive and good and nice. But sometimes she keeps asking until I'm pissed off. Whenever she's in a good mood, she likes to complain about her family and make fun of people, etc, and I get butthurt because I see a lot of those traits that she is hating on in myself. I don't want to join in on hating the people she hates because I feel like a massive hypocrite.", "summary": "My gf and I both have unhealthy, counterproductive behaviors, and we have a hard time talking about those behaviors and we seem to fight often because of it*"}
{"id": "t3_2shoxh", "subreddit": "self", "title": "I'm terrified. Is there anyone who can help?", "post": "I've been living with my sister since last march since she needed help with bills and i needed a place to go. Her husband was in prison since January 2012 and she was doing her best but then she lost her job toward the end of 2013 and needed money. In march 2014 my father stole the rent money and caused problems so we had to move from home. My sister said i could stay with her as long as i helped with bills. I lost my job that same month so we were both on a fixed income but managed to make things work together. I finally found work in october and i started paying more to help out instead of saving up for a new place. Today her husband showed up and decided to throw both of us out since its his house. There were problems between them for a while so i guess thats what cause him to decide to just come home and kick her out and me too since he never wanted me there to begin with. I have til next week to get out. Im scared cause i have no friends or anything so i have nowhere to go. My sister is going to stay with a friend from what she told me. I only have about $400 to my name and its difficult trying to find a place to rent since everything is more than that and most require a deposit. Does anyone in the East Los Angeles area know any place i might be able to rent with what little i have? I'm very tidy and quiet and keep to myself so i wont be a problem. I don't do drugs or anything and i'm very open minded. Can someone please help, I really dont know where else to turn to.", "summary": "Been living with my sis while her husband was in prison. He got home today and decided to throw us both out. Only have $400 and need a place to rent in East LA asap."}
{"id": "t3_2ws4lh", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by using snapchat next to shower", "post": "Real TIFU when I was using snapchat with my gf since i'm overseas. It was fun while it lasted and stupid me decided to use the shower back n forth until I eventually gave in and decided to do the dirty deed.\n\nAs I was sending a video of me playing with my monkey, my hands were wet and my phone being touch screen. Decided to automatically click 'My Story' and post it within a second... I hastily rushed to take it off as I didn't know how so I asked my gf and ended up taking it within a couple minutes. Still a couple of friends saw it and they were eating dinner at the time but couldn't. Thats what they get :P", "summary": "snapchatted gf in shower with video of me playing with le monkey and it automatically gets put up for all friends and family to see... :("}
{"id": "t3_4aq4i3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I get over knowing that all our plans are now gone after a break up, M 22/ Ex GF 19", "post": "(Full background under my submitted)\n\nI decided I couldn't wait for my ex to come around since there was no guarantee that me waiting for her would be worth it. Sure since the breakup we hadn't talked as much obviously but now that we are done seemingly forever I can't comprehend at all knowing that we will never laugh, kiss, talk etc etc together ever again. \n\nWe had so many plans and so much love but now all that is gone. How do I coupe with that? How can I move on and be happy after knowing all the hard work we put in and all the love is out the door now. I just can't wrap my head around knowing that the girl I thought I would marry will now move on and live her life away from me till the day we both die.  \n\nI still do care for her, yes I still love her even after everything that happened at the end. I feel so alone and lost even though the actual break up was months ago, I'm honestly just afraid of the future now.", "summary": "EX broke up with me a few months ago, recently decided I  couldn't wait around for her and now I can't coupe knowing the girl I loved is actually gone forever."}
{"id": "t3_3o8hzs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] with my friend [19 F] of 6 months, I found out she is a very popular webcam girl and more.", "post": "This is the weirdest thing that has happened in  my 19 years. This girl had stole my number from a mutual friend and started texting me about 6 months ago. We hit it off instantly and still do, the conversation never stops and we enjoy each others bodies alot.\n\nI can't remember how the conversation came about but we have both escorted before and we are both aware of this. I have recently stopped and I am well aware that she still does it, it doesn't stop me liking her all the same.\n\nBut today on twitter I was scrolling through and I saw a picture of a cat I was sure I had seen before. So I looked at the picture and I looked at a picture Sarah had sent me, It was her cat. So this confused the fucking life out of me, Sarah said she didn't use social media at all. But I did some digging and some searching around to find out that she is a  popular camgirl (I'm fine with this entirely). I found her social medias and so on and they are all under a different name. I'm aware of this, I have an alternative name for escorting myself (still fine with this).\n\nWhat i'm confused at is that how far does this go? I don't want to scare her away because she is amazing but then again I dont want to be lied to because I'm paranoid as it is.", "summary": "Girl and I have mutual interest, she has lied alot to me. I feel like she doesn't want to scare me away though and I don't know what to do as I don't want to scare her away. Advice?"}
{"id": "t3_1v856y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24m] seem to struggle to drop grudges over fairly pedantic things and it's affecting my ability to build relationships especially with a really lovely girl [23f] I met just recently.", "post": "Ok basically, I've started to notice that I have a lot of trouble dropping the little things. For example there was a girl a while back I was seeing and she kind of messed me about a bit, was rubbish at texting back, organising stuff, but usually when we were together it was amazing.\n\nAnyway, one weekend, I'd organised for us to go to the ballet and I was trying to make plans for what we were gonna do before/after and the day before I texted her asking what she fancied doing/what time she'd be free but didn't hear from her until 3 the following day, 2 hours before the ballet started. Anyway, she didn't really have any reason for not replying, nor did she really make much of an apology and it annoyed me. Consequently I couldn't really shake the feeling of being pissed off with her and so when we did meet up, I found it hard to act like I wanted to be with her. Kind of ruined the evening, and made things really awkward.\n\nSo I'm now seeing a new girl and I feel like this is going down a similar route. Not as bad, but I really don't want my hang-ups to be the downfall to this situation, I just don't know how to shake that feeling short of have a few drinks before I see her and that's probably not the best plan of action! Has anyone felt the same, or got any advice?", "summary": "Feel like I can't drop things as easily as I should. Tend to build up grudges over fairly trivial things and it ends up ruining any prospective relationships."}
{"id": "t3_2qnh07", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22F] sister [28F] is pregnant and I'm having a tough time being excited for her.", "post": "I don't really have a question or anything. I just need to vent and maybe reach out to those who have been in similar situations. \n\nMy sister told me yesterday that she's pregnant. At first I was thrilled. But then reality hit me. *I can't have children.*\n\nI'm so happy for my sister and my brother-in-law, I really am. But they weren't planning on having children for at least a few more years. My sister's never really wanted to be a mom. Me, on the other hand, have always lived for it. As a kid when people asked what I want to be when I grow up, I always said, \"a mom.\" \n\nBut, 3 years ago I found out I can never have children. I was devastated but have tried to tough it out, tried to believe it isn't true for years. I'm in a serious relationship and we're planning on getting married in a little over a year and starting to **try** having kids immediately, but we will probably end up adopting. While adopting is wonderful and that thought excites me, I still so badly want to be pregnant one day. \n\nMy sister being pregnant is like a kick in the side. A reminder that I'll never be pregnant. I don't want to be around her, I don't want to be happy for her. I'm jealous. I don't know how to deal with this. I never expected to feel anger towards my sister for getting pregnant. But really, how am I expected to feel about this?\n\nI would never dare tell my sister or anyone else in my family how I feel about this. I wouldn't want to upset anyone and I really don't want to be selfish and make this about me. It's just so hard.", "summary": "My sister's pregnant, I feel terrible for being upset about it ... But I can never have children of my own and I have no idea how to feel anything else about this."}
{"id": "t3_1d4d47", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I had a false alarm and not sure how to feel", "post": "So this basically just happend to me Im a 16 year old high school student and basically what happend to me was I was cleaning out my pigs pen after school and I hear a truck I look out and see the truck along with a couple of people from my class. Everything was perfectly fine but all of a sudden I hear a \"BANG BANG\" really fucking loud and I was in the pen inside the building and during the loud BANG I heard yelling, then my stomach just dropped I was sure it was gun shots or something. It was extremely loud and had a Pop-ing sound So I droped the shovel and what I was doing and jumped over the walls seprateing the pens then sprinted out the back door onto a trail. After I got out far enough I called my Father warning him not to go the the Agriculture area. After the trail ended at a no trespassing sign I ran through bushes and branches getting scraped up until I reached the clearing where I ran down to the schools office. The first thing they notice is im shaking, sweating, and stuttering like a motherfucker and asked what happend. I reported the incident and someone went up to check it out. Turns out what happend was one of the older boys that were up there was angry and he has some issues so he grabed a pig cane and smashed it against the building twice breaking it. It takes alot of force to break one of those or even dent a building which lead me to belive it was a gun shot. But I don't know I just feel like a bit of a coward and a idiot all at the same time and feel kinda bad about myself a little bit. The boys both aplogized to me but i still feel like a jack ass. Along with having to go to that class tommrow I know for a fact my teacher is going to question me and im gonna get a call from the therapist. Also could this have any kind of long term affect on me?", "summary": "I reported false gun shots and now I feel like a god damn idiot about myself and not sure how to feel about the whole incident. "}
{"id": "t3_4f0ca1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My [15/f] bf (18/m) about to graduate high school and is sending me major mixed messages about his level of commitment.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year.  He is graduating in a few months, and, I think, this has prompted him to be a little nervous about the future. We have talked about it and agreed that the relationship should terminate this summer when he goes to college. He and I clearly agreed to this plan, but he has repeatedly spoken in direct contrast to it, making me confused.  He will get worked up and say desperate things like, \"stay with me forever\", \"never ever forget me\", \"never leave me\", and even \"lets get married\". Obviously we are too young for any of this to be realistic. Last time he did this, I played along for the sake of the mood, and said \"of course we will be together forever\". It made me feel dishonest, because it is lie and we both know it. I'm worried he might actually believe me when I say those things, when this goes against what we agreed on rationally. Is this just some cute tactic he is employing where you make up alternative endings when you want to be romantic? Am I over thinking this? Is it all just dirty talk? When I remind him that we are breaking up and not staying together forever he gets sad and says I am scaring him. I don't want either of us to feel lead on or get hurt when the time comes to say goodbye.", "summary": "Bf agreed to end the relationship when he goes to college. Now his overly committed statements have me confused. How do I remind him of the plan tactfully when he forgets?"}
{"id": "t3_grs6g", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I was wondering if anyone has an unused Bulletstorm Epic Edition code that they are willing to part with...", "post": "I bought Bulletstorm when it came out and I got the code for the bonus Epic Edition content, including the Gears of War 3 Beta. Well, a friend of mine really, really, really loves Gears but he was unable to purchase the game due to money issues. I was willing to part with my code to give to him, but apparently a friend of mine who was over my house decided to enter the code so now mine is already used and I can't give it to my other friend. So what I'm asking is if someone has a code that they received with the game that they would be willing to give to me so that I could give it to my good friend. If anyone is up for it, I would be very appreciative and so would my friend. Thanks a bunch in advance.", "summary": "I'm asking if someone can give me an unused Bulletstorm Epic Edition Code so that my friend can play the Gears 3 Beta."}
{"id": "t3_4c3d9l", "subreddit": "running", "title": "Tips on getting back into running after 4 years of not doing so & shin splints", "post": "Hey everyone, I was hoping to gather some tips from people who left running and had to start over. \n\nA semi-lengthy background on myself to help you understand where I am coming from. In high school I was a very good cross country runner, running from 35-50 miles a week and never slower than 8-9 minute miles. At the end of senior year, I planned on taking a break from running and then try to race half or full marathons in the spring. I ended up not running at all after xc. 4 years later, I was noticing how much I miss the sport (especially after seeing the success of xc friends) so I decided to join a running group to get back into it. But the only group at my university that I could find was a triathlon club. I joined them, but only did the running workouts. After about 4 weeks, I developed shin splints. This is because I haven't ran in 4 years but thought 6 miles was ok after 4 weeks. Also, being 25 pounds heavier didnt help. After taking 3 months off and training on the bike and in the pool, I finally was back to running in february. but my shinsplints was still around. I finished my first sprint triathlon last week, and have been trying to get miles back under my feet again. I havent felt shin splints severely since the beginning of March, but I can feel it looming around. After a half year of it, I am getting really really frustrated. I cant run more than 4 miles still and my fastest mile is 8 minutes. I know I will probably never run like I did when I was 17, but its difficult because of remembering what I used to be capable of running.", "summary": "I want to get back into running shape, but am having a difficult/frustrating time doing so due to shin splints and high expectations."}
{"id": "t3_zyji8", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "How to start talking and then asking out girl you used to be friends with but it has been a while.", "post": "So the title might seem strange but trust me it sounds less weird in a larger description. Anyways I go to a Catholic military school. We have this huge formal dance and I have to bring someone from the sister school. So I think I know who I would like to ask, but how can I even start talking to her again. We used to be friends 2 years ago. But we kind of just went different ways. Funny how we both ended up going to the same joint schools after going to public school together for a while. But to the point, how can I start talking to her again? The schools only see each other 4 times over the year. I don't want to start an awkward message online either. What should I do? (Also this would probably only be for the dance I don't really have time during the day for a solid relationship since I have practice twice a day from 4 am to 6 am then 4pm until 6pm but if the chance came then maybe ages Me:17 Her:17)", "summary": "Want to ask girl I haven't talked to in a while to dance. How can I without seeming like a sketch?"}
{"id": "t3_3bk1ay", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Girl [16F] that I [17M] like suddenly stopped talking to me after seeing me again", "post": "There's this girl I work with (she's 16, I'm 17) who I met back in March when we started working together. We gradually started talking to each other and by May she was definitely interested in talking to me. In mid-May we stopped seeing each other for a little while because of our work schedule. I got her number and Snapchat in early May and ever since she's been texting/snapping me a lot every day, and she's called/facetimed me too. She's said cute things to me, told me some secrets of hers, and she's asked me tons of personal questions about me. She's told me she loves talking to me and laughs at most of the stuff I say and do. \n\nJust last Wednesday things oddly and abruptly seemed to go sour between us. We saw each other again last Wednesday at work and we both knew we would see each other then, and even earlier that day we were happily texting and snapping each other. The second I got to work, however, she just glanced at me and turned back around. Didn't even say 'hi' to me. I tried talking to her and having fun conversations with her but she was barely responding, and I could tell she didn't want to be talking to me. I tried texting and sending her snapchats on occasion since Thursday and her responses seem like she really doesn't want to be bothered, and like I'm some random stranger. I didn't say or do anything different so I have absolutely no idea what happened as to why she went from messaging me happily all the time to not wanting to talk to me as soon as she saw me again.\n\nI'm going to see her again this Wednesday at work. Should I try talking to her about it? Should I just ignore her? Should I try texting/snapping her the way we used to? Any advice will help. Sorry for the long read.", "summary": "Girl I like and work with loves texting and talking to me but ever since we saw each other again last Wednesday, she suddenly stopped talking to me."}
{"id": "t3_38v5om", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [F, 28] had an urge to look at her husbands [m, 29] phone and found 3 text threads. 2 exes and 1 fling", "post": "This dude has told her before that he needed attention from women but promised to stop after he got caught the first time. He never physically cheated on her (that we know of) but has had many emotional relationships with women over the phone that are flirtatious.\n\n  Something told her she needed to check his phone last night and she did. She found 3 threads to different girls (2 being exes) saying things like 'her my girl' and \"are you over me? Because I'm still not over you\".  The thing is though that these girls live in other countries so it's impossible to physically cheat, but I feel that texts like that are still cheating.\n\n  This guy also is a huge manipulator. He'll threaten to leave her (which I believe he does in hopes she'll beg him to stay and the whole thing will be forgotten) which he did today. \n\n   She is very against divorce so she always tries to fix it even though he hurts her with stuff like this.  They have known each other for 2 1/2 years and have been married for 8 months. \n\n   What do you think reddit. I know what I think but I want to see if you think the same.", "summary": "this chicks hubby is emotional cheating on her in texts with 2 exes and an old fling. All 3 live in other countries. "}
{"id": "t3_2ptxcs", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by Being Kind to a Hippie", "post": "In order to get a ride home from university for Winter Break, I consulted a local campus bulletin board designated for carpool listings.\nI got a ride with (in her own words) a \"free-spirit\" who decided to travel the country.\n\nI have been home in LA for over a week and she has parked her fucking Vanagon in front of my house every single day without fail.  I ended up giving her $100.00 for gas yesterday in a futile effort to send her on her way.  Instead, she bought an ounce of weed and sits on my curb smoking it all day.\n\nMy parents are suspicious, as they absolutely should be, yet none of us know what to do.  I honestly feel sorry for her and have let her shower in my house, which I instantly regretted when I found out she stole my damn shampoo.\n\nAs I type this she is staring in my fucking window from the cot in her van.  I pretend to be oblivious to her loitering, yet it is inherently troublesome for me.\n\nLast night is where I really fucked up.  I was under so much stress that I drank 15 shots and went to bed in my guesthouse.  She fucking saw me enter and crawled in bed with me.  I did not kick her out due to sympathy of her predicament and drunken stupor, and as a result, she thinks I am in love with her and lingers on my goddamn street all fucking day.", "summary": "I got a ride with a hippie from Denver to LA and now she lives in front of my house in her Vanagon."}
{"id": "t3_248nrk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [25F] boyfriend [29M] of 4 months doesn't want to know anything about my dating past. Should this bother me?", "post": "I'm  really happy with my boyfriend, but my one (kinda big) issue is that he doesn't want to know anything about my previous relationships. He doesn't like to talk about his either,  but the other night he ended up telling me a lot about his previous relationships. I liked hearing about his other gfs, because it helped me learn more about him. However, he doesn't want to know anything about mine; he says he wants to learn about me on his own. This upsets me because it makes me feel like he doesn't care, and there are things I would like him to know! \n\nr/relationships, what's your perspective on this?  Am I asking too much or being unreasonable? How much do you know about your s/o past? Do you share anything from your past? Why or why not?", "summary": "Bf doesn't want to hear about my past, I know a lot about his, this upsets me. Would like others perspectives!"}
{"id": "t3_4ajnsh", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [30 F] with my boyfriend [45 M] 1 month, Hispanic and white couple, cultural norms or narcissistic abuser?", "post": "please help. 1.5 years ago ended an abusive relationship with a narcissist. White male, 7 years older. After him, I'm paranoid about getting involved with another. Terrified.\n\nMet new guy online.\n\nRed flags: \n\nrushed things \n\nDeleted dating profile after a week of texting \n\nConfessed he had omitted one of 3 divorces \n\nSays he falling for me\n\nSeems to agree with everything I say\n\nI can do no wrong \n\nWe talk for hours and hours and hours \n\nBasic timeline:\n\nHe lives out of town since I'm moving to his area for work in 3 months \n\nMet him in person 2 weeks later \n\nDecided to date\n\nVery attentive \n\nSaid he wants me to be in his house as often as possible \n\nFast forward to this week:\n\nCame to stay with him for a week\n\nPassionate first 2 days\n\nI feel nervous now\n\nI feel distance on his end \n\nHe seems more genuine when drunk\n\nHe can be very self centered \n\nHe can be kind of cold and off putting \n\nI'm scared he will turn out to be another narcissist \n\nHoweber he seems to do anything I ask\n\nAt the same time, I feel passive aggressiveness \n\nAs a result of my abusive relationship I became super Independent\n\nSo while here, I'm working and networking as well. Don't need him next to me 24/7.\n\nBut physically we are good.\n\nIdk- are white men typically cold and just not as passionate and caring as Hispanic men?? He seems to be super into me but shy in a way. \n\nIs it the age difference?\n\nOr worse yet- sociopath? I can't help but feel worried about that. I kept asking him to tell me about feeling scared or worried about ANYTHING and he's like, nah sweetie I don't freak out :)\n\nThat worries the fuck out of me. Help. Should I still keep waiting it out??", "summary": "Young Hispanic female dating older white guy and confused about actions./ is it the age difference? Culture? Or sociopath???"}
{"id": "t3_s0u63", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "reddit, I need some advice on how best to approach a shitty situation between me and my friends", "post": "So basically, the other night I was convinced to host a little get together at my apartment with me and just 10 or 15 of my really close buddies.  Some of these people I've been great friends with since elementary school, others I met freshman year here at college, basically all dudes that I would trust with any of my personal belongings.  And I'm just the type of person that, if I get convinced to entertain my friends for a night, I have no problem with going the extra mile, hooking up the good sound system, etc.  Well, part of that sound system included my $400 tablet that I use to stream music.  \n\nAnyway, fast forwarding a few hours...we're all having a good time, everyone's buzzed, laughing, dancing, and people start to rotate picking songs by plugging in their own devices.  I paid no mind to it because I figured my tablet was just sitting right next to the speakers, whatever.  This was until I went to go look for it later in the night and couldn't find it anywhere.  So it got jacked.  I don't know why I needed to provide so much detail, but yeah.\n\nThere were only 3 people that I didn't know (and they came with my really good friend) so I figured they'd be cool.  I talked to the guy who's better friends with them and he sympathized, asked them for me, and all of them deny anything.  I'm 99.9% sure none of my good friends would do something like this to me, but I'm not sure what else I can do to get to the bottom of this.  I don't want to question the people my friends hang out with because it's entirely possible this is just a huge understanding; but if it's not, and these strangers DIDN'T take it, the alternative explanation is something I never hoped I'd have to deal with.", "summary": "400 dollar tablet got stolen at a party full of 10-13 really close friends and 2 or 3 strangers who came with one of my close friends.  How do I best address this situation without stepping on too many egg shells?"}
{"id": "t3_36enbm", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Standing up for myself begins here", "post": "I've always said I'm a resilient person. I'm a strong woman. But I've been through a lot of hell in my short adult life.\nI thought I was ready to move on after what had happened to me 6 months ago. Apparently, what they said about this sticking with me for life was true. The concept of a normal relationship seems too far gone for me now that I'm a different person. I was raped. And I've been trying to reclaim my life for 6 months.\n\nThat's not the beginning though. For 3 years I was in an emotionally, physically and sexually abusing relationship. Following that I spent another year with someone who sexually abused me. I was so done with being abused that I had a one night stand, believing that it was my chance to take ownership of my own body. It wasn't until a stranger raped me that I finally understood how fucked up my sex life had been. \n\nNow that I'm dealing with the aftermath of my rape, I'm unsure of where to go. I had two friends with benefits, both ending badly. One became my best friend and the other tried too hard to get me in his pants. I finally found the strength to tell him no. \n\nIt's been a long journey, but it turns out that the first person I fell into after my rape was the first person to even attempt understanding me. I fell in love with him, and I still am. He treated me like I was more than a body. He started out as a friends with benefits, but the moment he saw how scarred I was - something he noticed before even I did - he assumed the role of my best friend. For that I am forever grateful.\n\nRecently I fell into a new friendship that took a wrong turn. We had sex. Or do I even call it that? I didn't have the heart to say no. I don't know if I've ever been able to say no, after the first guy took advantage of me. I just assumed that any man who took the time to touch me had owned me.\n\nI'm ready to stand up for myself and stop giving my body up to people who take it for granted. It's my body. \n\nWhere do I begin to take a stand?", "summary": "Had 2 abusive relationships, one night stand, was raped, and had 3 fwb. I need to stand up for myself and my own body. Help me figure out how."}
{"id": "t3_oujyw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Given all the talk about copyright lately, do you think that copyright hinders quality?", "post": "This is a thought I've had recently. The entertainment markets are so flooded with mundane, average media. From music, to movies, to [books](\n\nI've been trying to figure out why so many people are trying to be authors, musicians, or make indie films. It's not just because they think they have good ideas. I think it has to do with getting paid to do something you don't hate, or even love, even if you're only mediocre at it.\n\nBack before the internet, the cream still rose to the top because of how difficult distribution was. Only the best stood out. Fewer choices, but better quality. Now anyone can call themselves a musician with a webcam and some guitar lessons. Anyone can distribute a book online. Anyone can shoot a movie and edit it on their Macbook.\n\nI have a hard time finding good quality entertainment, especially music. It's not that the good ones aren't making music; it is that I don't have the spare time to hunt them down through the hordes of the average.\n\nDo you think that we have so many people trying to make a quick buck because of the way the copyright laws are written? If you you could only only own a copyright for 14 years, would you put in the effort to make a mundane one-hit wonder?", "summary": "I know the issue is multi-faceted, but do you think a big reason for the entertainment market being flooded is the way copyright law is written?"}
{"id": "t3_4k1klg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/F] with my partner [27 M/] of 2 years, should I go attend a party where ex will be present ?", "post": "This is my first time posting here in Reddit. So I'm a bit nervous. \n\nI have been with my partner(Ben) for 2 years now. He's one of the most wonderful guys I know. He has never ever given a reason to ever doubt on him. He treats me like a princess all day everyday. \n\nWe have a birthday dinner coming up next weekend. It's Ben's Bestfriend's (John) wife's(Ruby) birthday. I know Ruby is best friends with my partner's ex. I know their 'relationship' lasted for a month. He wasn't ready for a commitment then. And I'm also not very close with Ruby.  I don't know if I should go. I also have work on that day. So I'll have to find someone to replace my shift. So should I tag along with him or just let him go alone ? \n\nAll the advice will appreciated!", "summary": "my boyfriend's bestfriend's wife's birthday coming up. They invited us. I don't know if I should go knowing my partner's ex will be there."}
{"id": "t3_4jf0gm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (20/m) conflicted about breaking up with my girlfriend (18/f) of 2 years.", "post": "Her family was going on vacation over next weekend and I was invited but I would feel guilty going and wanted to break up with her before then. I feel like it isn't the best idea though. \n   \n   I love my girlfriend but she is always wanting to drink and smoke weed which I'm not okay with. I tried getting over it but it always keeps me up at night knowing what she's doing. I know it seems like I'm being tight. \n  \nI grew up with an alcoholic step-father who was physically abusive not only no my mother but me as well whenever i tried to step in and alcohol has been a no for me ever since it just eats at me. My actual father was also a drug dealer so I always blamed drugs for the way he acted and for never being around. \n  \n From a point of view I can see how I'm being unreasonable but I can't get over these things. I've tried talking to her about it and she told me she wouldn't do anything if I didn't want her to and she still does saying she only tells me those things because it makes me feel better and that my past shouldn't affect her decisions. I love her extremely but these reasons eat at me.", "summary": "My girlfriend is drinking and smoking weed even though i asked her not to and I can't get over my own reasons to be okay with it."}
{"id": "t3_3gwhgq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I[17 M] think I am falling in love with my classmate[17 F]! I don't know anything about dating/girls.", "post": "Hello people!\n\nSo, me and this girl. I don't exactly know how to begin, because it's my first post on reddit, ever. So it says i can use fake names. Let's name her Lea. And i know her since 1 year\n\nWe usually talk nomally just like friends. But when we're together at parties, well, we just get closer to each other. I guess that's mostly because alcohol makes conversations easier. But well, the furthest we got is holding hands and going a little bit around in a small forest next to a club. (we were very drunk and i don't remember much... Lea told me about this). But we have this more often, that we get closer while being a little bit drunk.\n\nSo the next thing is i know from friends, who are also somtimes texting with her, that it looks like she's kinda interested in me. And yeah, so i just wrote her one night, that i think we should talk. I am very sure that she knows what i mean and she answered that we only see eachothers at parties and normally you can't really have serious talks there.\n\nWell now i need your advice. I have no idea what to do and i am in panic. I hope somebody knows what to do. I am being serious and I'm hoping for a serious relationship. And I don't know if she wants to talk or not and to be honest I'm to afraid to simply ask her if we want to meet. aaaah. What to do??\n\nSorry for my not-so-perfect english.", "summary": "I'm always getting closer with a girl at parties while being drunk. I dont know what to do. already told her that i think we should talk!"}
{"id": "t3_1bxn3m", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "Why I hate my neighbors.", "post": "They are loud. All the fucking time. If they are in their room they have their music on and it is all the way up.\n\nIf it's not music, their TV is literally ALL THE WAY UP. Like, imagine movie theater speakers in a 10' by 14' room.\n\nI live in a suite style dorm. The walls are normal drywall type walls. Not cinder blocks like a normal dorm. \n\nThey have motherfucking subwoofers or whatever. My room shakes.\n\nThey play music from 10am till 10pm. Or 2am on the weekends. I lose sleep because of them and then I'm tired all day. But I can't nap because they are fucking loud.\n\nI wish they would fail out of school. Like, now.\n\nI complain to the desk downstairs but there is no noise ordinance since it's a state school and it's run by the state and not the borough or some weird shit. \n\nI have written around 10 noise violation complaints but that has literally done nothing.\n\nI have never hated something or someone as much as I hate them.\n\nI'm doing bad in school because of them. I failed a class because I never slept before my 9:30am class. How is this okay? I've complained to many people about them and no one has the authority to do anything. I pay just as much to live here as they do. Why do I have to suffer? \n\nSome people aren't at school just to party.\n\nI'm exhausted, I'm stressed, and I don't know what to do.\n\nThanks for reading.", "summary": "rude ass neighbors don't realize I'd rather not listen to the song \"Pussy Nigger\" on repeat for two semesters."}
{"id": "t3_1n6qsy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [27, M] falling for my best friend [25, F], also a Mate's ex (also a workmate)", "post": "I met this girl (lets just call her Scarlett), and my mate when I hired him about 2 years ago, he and I quickly became fairly good friends outside of work. \n\nI started talking to Scarlett this past Christmas when their relationship was on the rocks, purely as moral support as I had no feelings for her then, their relationship did not last and they went their separate ways a month or 2 later.\n\nScarlett and I have since then become very close friends, we have dinner every week, coffee every other day and she is also my boxing partner. We spend a lot of time together.\n\nNow, over the past few months I started to see feelings develop, and they have grown into something much much greater. I have perhaps picked up on a few signs that she may be starting to feel the same way, although this could just be wishful thinking.\n\nScarlett is currently overseas, due back in a week, and I miss her terribly, however we do Facebook more or less every day.\n\nSo being her best friend is one massive hurdle to climb over, the second, although my mate doesn't care that we hang out, is if the feelings are mutual and a relationship does occur, I would lose both that mateship and a harmonious workplace.\n\nWhat on earth do I do?", "summary": "Falling for my best friend who is also my mate's (whom I work with, and am also his boss) ex girlfriend, and I am after advice on what to do."}
{"id": "t3_jme2e", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "The current school of thought is that a person should go directly from high school to college to job. How do you jump into this if you only have a vague idea of what you're getting into?", "post": "The setup: A buddy of mine who'll be a senior this year in high school is trying to approach the college search, major selection, figure-out-the-rest-of-your-life-right-now with a bit of trepidation. I can't really offer him a ton of advice because a. I'm only starting college this year so I have no experience, and b. I know where my interests lie so I'm not in his unsure situation.\n\nThe buddy: He is fairly good at physics, computer science, building stuff with his hands, making new things, friendly debates, video games, and chess. He is an excellent chef and great at cheering people up. His personality leans to liking some freedom in his work and being able to twist ideas into a more interesting way when completing assignments. \n\n***HIS BIGGEST CONCERN***: that his interests are only what his friends like and that once he goes into a major in college he will realize that he never liked it after all.\n\nPossible paths include: Physics major, undecided major, taking lots of shop classes, traveling a bit, working on his grandparents' farm.", "summary": "The question: What's the best path for my buddy to take if he doesn't quite know what to do with his life yet?"}
{"id": "t3_hm58i", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I've cheated on my GF twice already...been with her for almost 5 years...what do?", "post": "M; 24 here. GF: 26\nFirst met at 19 and she 21.\n\nI first cheated on her the first year we were together. It seems as if she knew that I was flirting around with the first girl so did some of my friends. \n\nSecondly was a completely drunk situation. about 1 1/2 yrs ago. I met up with an old family friend who I've known since I was a kid. We went out for a couple drinks to catch up, went back to my place, after a joint later we ended up fucking. She was married and has 1 kid....\n\nI felt like horse shit the next day and even more throughout the years. I'm feeling pretty disturbed by everything that I've done...and everything that I kept to myself. I'm too ashamed to let anyone know or talk about it with anyone. She loves the hell out of me and I've matured to a point to realize the shit I've done.\n\nReally feeling like shit, I've had feelings of just straight out breaking up with her and not letting her know why...other side of me says to say and fight your way back up to a respectable level. \n\nI've been avoiding keeping in contact with other girls as well as limiting myself from partying/going out. I realize what I've done and the effects of it so far. I've already begun reevaluating my morals and practicing them on a daily basis. I prepare myself mentally to deal with what I've done to her and myself as well as what to do now that I realize this. \n\nI just want to see what the community has to say about my situation", "summary": "Cheated on GF twice, realized what I've done, changed lifestyle around 360 to become a loyal man, havent met up/called/PM'ed another girl since then yet, still feel like shit :( What do?"}
{"id": "t3_1m2wxb", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (18/f) have to choose between my parents and my boyfriend (21/m).", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years. It's been a long-distance relationship (we met online) but we've spent time together in person and are madly in love and want to spent the rest of our lives together. I recently started attending college and my boyfriend and I were so excited because we had been planning on him moving out there with me (he attended trade school and is now working and has the flexibility to move). He has purchased an apartment and a plane ticket and is planning to come out here at the end of October. \n\nMy parents, however, are completely against it. They've gone overboard (my mom threw away everything in my room back home, she's trying to convince my dad to sell my car, and she's trying to get me to pay for everything entirely on my own i.e. insurance and whatnot). \n\nMy mom and I were always friends and my dad was the mean one, but the roles have flipped, even though my dad is still against it too. They are concerned I'll begin to completely ignore my friends and not get involved with anything (I'm in music ensembles, the cycling club, and the residence hall senate).\n\nHe completely refuses to wait any longer, which I fully understand. At home, he has only one real friend due to everything being expensive in New York City so he doesn't like going out with people. He isn't close with his family and is just very lonely. He will not wait any longer to move, regardless of what my parents will do.\n\nI don't want to completely ruin my relationship with my parents, I mean, they're my parents and they've given up a lot for me over the past 18 years. But I also couldn't imagine my life without my boyfriend. My parents want me to have the \"college experience,\" even though I feel like they are the ones that are messing that up. They call me daily and cause me to cry, which then causes me to lock myself up in my room and not spend time with my friends.\n\nI love my boyfriend and I don't want to lose him. And I don't want my children to not know their grandparents. What the hell do I do :(", "summary": "BF is moving to my college town to be with me after 2 yrs of long-distance. Parents threatening to completely cut me off if he does. I don't want to lose either of them."}
{"id": "t3_4zjy2i", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Large unemployment gaps, outdated skills & portfolio, never worked in my field of study.", "post": "I am 45 years old, have been living out of the US for two years; previous to that my career history was spotty at best, lots of temp jobs, and short term employment. \n\nMy BFA is in Industrial Design, I've never worked as an Industrial Designer; my first job out of college was as a laborer (fall '01) then I was hired on as a marketing assistant for a real estate company. This had varying degrees of graphic design, nothing complex.\n\nMy computer skills have suffered because the ID field has moved onto software that is out of my price range and my computer's capabilities. I do still have solid Adobe Creative Suite skills. \n\nI also have a depression, anxiety, and attention disorder. The attention disorder is the biggest factor in my design work, little things slip by me at times but they are frowned upon when they have happened. \n\nI'm looking for suggestions in possible career changes or career advice in general.", "summary": "45, out of the US for 2 years, spotty job history, outdated skill set and computer skills, need advice."}
{"id": "t3_22asf7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 M] with my Over-attached Drug Dealer [21 M]", "post": "Duration of relationship: 1 year.\n\nI'll call him J because that's the first letter of his first name. \n\nA quick background on me, though, first: I'm anti-social as fuck. Don't have a single friend that I'm not dating. Don't even talk to anyone. I'm OK with that though. I really don't like anyone I meet.\n\nI met my drug dealer J through my old work. I smoke weed once every few weeks, and I use a vaporizer and buy 1oz+ at a time - basically, I only buy weed once in a very long while. The last time I bought was October and I've still got enough to last for another month or two. Not a week has gone by that this guy hasn't texted me asking if I wanted to buy any weed from him. I keep saying I'll just text him when I need some, and that it will be likely weeks/months away.\n\nI can't just tell him to fuck off because I do need to buy drugs from him at some point in the not-so-far future, but I really don't need them now and I wish he would leave me alone. \n\nThe other day he texted me talking about how he was trying to \"step up his game\" and trying to find out \"who was legit and who wasn't\" and talking about me basically cheating on him with another dealer (Which I'm not, and if I was it wouldn't be any of his business). \"I can get u better bud cheaper i swear to god. you can try it before you buy.\"\n\nI agreed to buy some weed from him next week just to get him to shut up. But I'm sure after that he'll keep hounding me. So what do I do?", "summary": "Drug dealer won't leave me alone, but I almost never buy drugs. Don't know any other dealers/ am not willing or able to meet any."}
{"id": "t3_j0rua", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Help me Reddit: What's the best way to help someone through an awkward situation?", "post": "So, I was taking a man's order at the cafe I work at. He was pretty overweight, crazy hair, sunglasses with one of the arms broken off, and just seemed generally socially awkward. He orders a cupcake, which is pretty expensive, and I tell him the price is $4.26. He reacts: \"Oh wow, $4.26?\" And I reply that it will change his life.\n\nThe response that floored me: \"Oh, well, I'm going to hold you to that, if it doesn't I'll put it on my blog. Yeah, I've already been taking pictures of you with my phone, oh my god what am I saying.\"\n\nI laugh quietly and just finish the transaction in silence, pretending to not have heard him. But seriously you guys, this shit was hella awkward. And I felt super bad for this dude because it obviously just slipped out, as a joke that just turned out to be really creepy. SO WHAT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?", "summary": "Socially awkward customer makes creepy joke about taking pictures of me with his phone and is completely flustered. I respond with feigned ignorance."}
{"id": "t3_2zwgr5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need advice on how to break up with my bf. We live 3000 miles apart.", "post": "Hello,\n\nI'll try to keep this short. I'm 22[F], I have been with my bf (23) for 4 years. We lived together for 3. He lives in the UK, we've been apart for 6 months now, and it made me realise how unhappy I was in that relationship. I'm coming back to the UK in 6 months. I loved him, he is a very sweet guy, but he's got aspergers syndrom and depression, and I just don't think I can handle this anymore. It seems like a shitty reason to break up with someone, but I just want to be happy, and I don't think I can be with him. Now, I was thinking I could wait until I come back to tell him face to face, but he's started looking at flats for us to live together when I come back, and I don't know if I want to do this to him, letting him believe that it will continue as it was before I left... He's started an accountancy course that should end in August, he's dropped out of Uni twice due to his mental problems, he's doing fine in this course and I'm scared telling him I want to move on might make him drop out of this too. Also his parents have some of my stuff that I left in the UK, and I can't just tell them \"so I broke up with your son, but if you could hold onto my crap for another 6 months it'd be great !\" ... \nAlso we have a joint bank account I can't close while I'm away.\nAdvice needed. Please ! =(", "summary": "I want to break up with my BF, but I don't know when to do it, how to do it considering his mental issues, and how to sort out the logistic problems."}
{"id": "t3_354xe5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "i (23/f) think I need to break up with my boyfriend (24/m) of 2.5 years. How do I handle this situation?!?", "post": "Hi reddit- this is a throwaway for (somewhat) obvious reasons. My boyfriend is a redditor and we're in an awkward situation. \n\nI am super unhappy with my boyfriend. He's super disrespectful, frequently groping me or making inappropriate jokes about my body in public. When I convey to him that these jokes make me uncomfortable, and that I wish he would stop, he makes passive aggressive comments like \"well I'm not intending to be MEAN,\" or \"can you tell me what I'm doing to make you mad?!\" I explain the situation/my feelings, and then he continues this same behavior. He has also recently demanded that I get a second job, even though I work 40+ hours a week, and he works part time as a substitute teacher. I'm due to start graduate school in the fall, and I'm not comfortable taking on another job just to quit it in four months. I've expressed this to him, and he seems to think its all a big joke. He also displays other behaviors that have led me to conclude that I can't be with him anymore. \n\nHere's where the situation get awkward: we're both recent college grads, and have been living with his family while we get our ducks in a row, financially. They're great people and I love them dearly, and I hate the sever any ties with them, especially because I don't get along so well with my own family (besides my mother, who is fantastic, but not the best source of support in situations like these). Furthermore, the graduate school I'm attending is in his home town. While it's not exactly a small city, I don't know many people here and all of my friends, I know through him (they are also great people- I really don't know how such a douche managed to surround himself with so many fantastic people, but he did)! I'd hate to run into any awkward situations, but I know I can't be with this guy any more. I know I'll Have to burn some bridges, but I'd hate to make too many people hate me. How do I handle this without making people hate me?!", "summary": "how do I end a relationship without burning every bridge I've built in the town where I'll be living for a while?"}
{"id": "t3_1wb1rt", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[26/m] Past experiences talk gone bad", "post": "Gf[26/f] and I are together for 8 years. Some time before meeting her, I had a long distance relationship with a girl but only met once. This is important because the wanting to really meet at least once and get down to business was great. A couple of years went by and I finally had an opportunity to meet that girl and I didn't let it slip. This happened only once and it worked as a closure to me and the other girl.\n\nYesterday when telling her how the sex went, I changed the timeline so it won't *conflict* with our relationship, to which my gf said *So you lied to me, I was not your first :(*, this really hit me hard.\n\nWe are in our first relationship, we were both virgins when we met and we did a lot of first things together. So this is part of our history together and I think this is important.\n\n**Question:** I don't want her to think she was not my first girl, but if I tell her I cheated on her, will it be worse? Sounds dumb, but I' am at a loss right now.", "summary": "Cheated on gf, now she thinks she was not my first girl. Should I come clean and be a cheater or leave her to think she was not my first."}
{"id": "t3_3ev9or", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (26M) a worthless piece of shit. My wife (24F) is scared of me, as much as I'm scared of myself.", "post": "My wife and I have been having a lot of arguments lately. Usually about the same stuff, she or I take something the other person said wrong or offensively.\n\n I have mommy and daddy issues, major ones to the point I have to feel loved everyday and shown affection. Sometimes I feel as though she doesn't love me, or she's disgusted by me.\n\n Today we started arguing bc she didn't want to hug or kiss me, as usual it turns into a 2 hour seaming contest and i noticed that it's starting to get more and more physical. I've never hit her, and she's never hit me. We have just been grabbing and poking a lot. I feel fucking horrible. I never wanted her to be scared of me, I want her to love me. I'm so lost, I feel like self harm on my part is inevitable. Please give me advice on how to make things better! I know I have a lot to work on!", "summary": "wife and I's relationship is getting more physical, need advice on how to not be violent when we feel wronged."}
{"id": "t3_4a9sjq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm [20/f] depressed and dragging my boyfriend [22/m] of 2 years down with me", "post": "I have had anxiety for most of my life and for the past 2-3 years I've also been pretty depressed. Boyfriend did not know any of this when we got into a relationship but was very supportive and nice when he found out. He's been my rock (therapist has suggested I rely maybe a bit too much on him for comfort) and is generally very upbeat and positive and tries his best to help me.\n\nI've noticed though for the last 2-3 months that I seem to be dragging him down. He's more irritated than usual and more stressed about things that didn't stress him much before. He tells me the latter is a good change because he was rather careless before. I disagree with him on this but won't argue about it.\n\nWe live about an hour's drive from each other, so we usually see each other once a week. When I've spent time with him I have more energy and feel slightly better than normal. But I think when he has spent time with me he feels tired and stressed.\n\nI'm starting to worry that this relationship isn't healthy for him but he's too loyal and kind to notice or do anything about it. \n\nLike I said, he's more stressed and not the same upbeat happy person he was when we met.\n\nWhat made me think about this was seeing him with his female friend. I watched them chat and laugh together and realized what a perfect match they are. They're both gorgeous, blonde with blue eyes and fit, their eyes lit up as they talked about their favorite type of music (genre that I dislike) and I know her sex drive is very high and would be a much better match for him than me. He seemed so relaxed and happy with her, like he used to be when I first met him. It was very eye opening seeing them together like this.\n\nI don't want him to waste his best years in an unhappy relationship. But then again I know my depressed thoughts aren't perfectly logical so that's why I want a neutral person's opinion on this and whether I should even mention this to him.", "summary": "I'm depressed and it's dragging my normally optimistic boyfriend down. Worried he would be better off single. Not sure if I should bring this up with him."}
{"id": "t3_48emsy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by coloring my hair fire engine red and making my boyfriend think I was dying.", "post": "I usually dye my hair dark reddish brown, but thought I'd like a change. And being in college still, there's no better time to experiment with cool hair colors.\n\nI bought a box of hair bleach, and another of red dye and went to work in my apartment bathroom. After a while of sitting around waiting for the dye to take, I got in the shower to rinse it out. \n\nThere was a lot of it in my hair, so when i stepped into the shower, the bright red dye started rinsing out and pooling in the bottom of the shower, which doesn't drain well. And of course, some dripped into my eye, causing me to flail around, splattering dye all over the shower tiles and sliding glass door as I looked for a towel. \n\nJust as I was dabbing my eye with the wet corner of the towel, my boyfriend (He lives with me) came home and came into the bathroom. \n\nHe saw the red splattered glass door, and me in the shower, and screamed. I, startled by hearing him scream since I hadn't even heard him come into the bathroom, yelped too. I jumped back and stumbled to the ground in the shower, and he pulled the door open, freaking out. \n\nHe saw me fallen down in several inches of blood red water, with more red splats all over the wall, and that was when I realized how scary it must have looked. \n\nI quickly said that it was just hairdye, and we ended up laughing about it.", "summary": "Dyed hair bright red. Boyfriend walked in on me washing out the dye in the shower, and thought I was covered in blood."}
{"id": "t3_37hfn4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22F] have no passion or sexual desire for my [22M] boyfriend of 2 years.", "post": "I've been with my current boyfriend for almost 2 years. We've had our up and downs, and love each other very much. The problem is: I didn't desire him much sexually  when we got together, and it's only gotten worse. He's fit, really attractive, but I have no interest whatsoever in having sex with him and he's more of a fraternal figure in my life right now. It's not a problem of *\"mixing it up\"*: I've tried several things by now. Sex is mostly awkward, I never get off and even though he's open to trying new positions and pleasuring me, when we end up doing it it's just awkward as hell. Most of the time I want to cry during sex. \n\nI'm attracted to other people, but don't want to break the relationship off as I really love him and want to work something out. I want to get past this, but it's hard to be in a relationship in which you don't find your partner attractive. \n\nWhen we met he was having sex every week with different people, was into really kinky stuff and had sex with both male and female partners. I'm not so experienced, but have enjoyed sex with my former partners much more. At first he tried domination stuff on me which made me super awkward, and when I brought it up we switched to more vanilla sex (he never had that) and just didn't do it for me anymore. It's been like this since the 6th-7th month of our relationship. I could seriously go months without sex, but I try to have sex at least twice a week to make him happy. He's very willing to try anything to make it work and tries pleasuring me and other things. \n\nIs this normal? Will I get past this?", "summary": "Have lost absolute sexual interest in my partner of 2 years, wondering if it's normal and what I can do about it."}
{"id": "t3_2ysllk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Should I [20F] still try to show my ex of almost a year [21M] emotional support, or just stay out of his life?", "post": "Okay, I dated \"Jason\" for only about 7 or 8 months. We broke up because I was going through a lot mentally with myself (anxiety, recovering from an eating disorder, and depression) and I didn't feel in the right place to be in a relationship. I needed time to work on myself.\n\nJason has a lot of family issues. I won't get into that too much, but basically his dad is an asshole, his mom is extremely sick and Jason's the only one there for her. He's had to call 911 for her a few times as his dad does nothing to help, yet still is an idiot to Jason.\n\nAbout a month after we first broke up, I told him I'm still here if he needed anything. Unfortunately, when he wanted to hang out, I told him I would but i really really couldn't bring myself to be social yet/ see him. This happened a couple times, i feel REALLY stupid for it, but I honestly tried. I think as a result of this he blocked my number and we haven't talked since.\n\nI haven't had contact with Jason for a few months, but I still see him post on more personal websites (like tumblr) about how his mom is getting even more sick (may even be on life support, I can't tell completely by what he typed) he's extremely depressed and dealing with a lot of anxiety, and he said that the worst part is how he's still in love with his ex (me) and he can't get over it and move on or be attracted to anyone else because of it. I don't know if i should try to contact him and apologize and show him my sympathy for his mom and everything, or just stay out of it? I feel terrible and even worse for \"ditching\" him in the past, even though I don't want a romantic relationship.", "summary": "My ex is going through a lot with his family, and still misses me even though we haven't talked in months. Should i show him support for what he's going through, or just stay out of it?"}
{"id": "t3_sx3y9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What song did you rock out to when you were a kid?", "post": "I recently watched the new viral video of the dad driving his kids to school rocking out to bohemian rhapsody( and it reminded me of when i was a kid driving to school or the store listening to music with my parents.\n\nI remember whenever my dad would drive us anywhere we would listen to appetite for destruction by Guns n' Roses. More specifically Welcome to the jungle and Sweet child of mine. For example when listening to welcome to the jungle we would all yell at the end \"Its gonna bring you down!\" and grunt with the song while making a thrusting motion that to this day i can't help but do. But, the one i remember the most is paradise city. You know, right when the whistle blows and starts the guitar solo? Looking back i remember my dads ugly piece of shit car with no bass(because bass didn't matter back then) with \"ok\" speakers that for some miracle didn't blow out from the years of abuse. I remember every time that solo started the car would in sync start banging there heads and the whole earth would start shaking with us and swerving side to side, Honking the horn and raising hell(probably over imagined that) every single car ride. \n\nEven though i am probably not gonna be able to hear anything when i'm in my 60s it was still one of my favorite memories as a kid. and it certainly made a major impact on how i am today.\n\n(", "summary": "): So My Question is what song do you guys remember rocking out to or singing along to or rapping to when you were a kid with your parents and do you have a cool story along with it?"}
{"id": "t3_2b6aoo", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by giving my tickets I was trying to sell to a homeless guy.", "post": "Me and my brother went to the neighborhood concert in Dallas but when we showed up two hours early the line was already hundreds of people long. We kept debating whether to stay and be packed into the back where we couldn't see the stage all too well, or go see rise of the planet of the apes and then play super smash brothers. Eventually we decided on the latter. My brother set off to sell the tickets for 80 bucks a piece. He was offered a maximum of 30 bucks. He then sent me to try my hand at selling the tickets.  I have grown up in a small rural town all my life and now I was bargaining on the street side in Dallas, and I guess this homeless guy sensed it. He asked to see my tickets. I hand them over. He says he can give 50 dollars. I'm elated I beat out my brother. He gives his guy a call. It goes to voicemail. He says he will be right back with the money. He doesn't come back. My brother is still berating me.", "summary": "I went to a concert with my brother and we backed out. I tried to sell the tickets and a homeless guy tricked me and took them."}
{"id": "t3_3s3wlp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25M] with my ex-gf [26F] of 5 years i broke it off and feel like garbage. I need insight.", "post": "Dated this girl for 5 years she was amazing and the most beautiful girl. We were each other's firsts.\n\nShe turned abusive at year 4 and cheated on me with my best friend. She dumped me after. One month later, she dumps him and wants me back. I foolishly accepted.\n\nWe've been \"dating\" but it's really just sex and then she would be distant for a week, then sex, then she would bring up something from the past and use it against me. I never instigated, all I say is 'okay' and talk about other stuff.\n\n**I finally left her today**\n\nI told her it's over and i never want to see her again. I blocked her on everything.\n\nMy problem is i feel extremely empty and depressed right now. I've been crying for 3 hours and I'm a wreck. Did I make the right choice? What do I do now?", "summary": "Finally mustered the courage to leave an abusive girlfriend. Now I feel awful and i dont know whats going on or what to do. I miss the old her so much. So so much."}
{"id": "t3_2tw71z", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by blowing my nose in the shower", "post": "Well reddit, I fucked up hard. I woke up this morning with a nasty cold, and I hopped in the shower before getting ready for school. I thought to myself, \"Why don't I just blow my nose in the shower, I mean, it's all just going to go down the drain anyway?\" \n\nSo I let it rip. Huge chunks of mucus came flying out my nose and onto the bottom of the tub. They were actually so big that I had to intentionally get water to flow onto them to make them move. I got out of the shower, feeling MUCH better with myself, and put my clothes on. As I was downstairs getting the last of my stuff together, I could hear my roommate getting up and walking into the bathroom. I was then serenaded by the lovely sounds of her screaming, \"Oh my f***** god!\" I half-jogged upstairs and saw her standing in the bathroom looking down into the tub. She told me, verbatim, \"Shadowheart321, I know guys have needs, but can you **PLEASE** keep it out of the shower and keep it in your room?\"\n\nI realized when I looked into the tub that we had just gotten a new drain catch and all of my nasty phlegm was stuck in it. I quickly caught on and started telling her that it wasn't what she thought and I was just really sick and I just had to blow my nose and it's not that, etc. She was listening to none of it and was still just staring into the tub with an appalled face on. As I bantered, my other roommate walked into the room to see what the fuss was about, and before I could even try to explain what happened, he looked into the tub and started absolutely hollering. In a last ditch effort to prove to them that it wasn't *that*, I leaned over, stuck my hand into the drain catch and scooped up some of my nasal droppings and told them to take a deep wiff of it. Then both turned out of the bathroom looking queasy as I stood there with a handful of mucus sitting in my palm. I will forever be known as the guy who picked up his own load from the bottom of the shower and told them to smell.", "summary": "Blew my nose in the shower, my roommates thought it was a wad of baby gravy, and I picked it up in my hand telling them to smell it."}
{"id": "t3_g652k", "subreddit": "BreakUps", "title": "The Break Up: Should I have hope or just move on...", "post": "So my bf and I have been in a relationship for eight months, friends for a couple of years. \n\nI wasn't happy with how the relationship was progressing so sent him this message:\n\n*I feel like us being together isn't working. I don't think you'll ever like me as much as I want you to. I know I can't change you, but I really thought that by now we would be much more closer to each other.\nI feel like I'm a girl you hang around, I don't feel like a girlfriend. I don't feel special and I've been trying to hold back my feelings of love cos I don't want to put them out there and find out that you don't share them.\nI just don't see the point. I want a boyfriend who can express his feelings, I know you've been hurt before, but I thought you would get over that, that you would know you could trust me and maybe even fall in love with me.\nBut I can't wait forever and I don't sense things changing anytime soon.\nPlease can you tell me how you feel, otherwise we should just go our seperate ways.* \n\nHe replies with this:\n*To tell the truth i kind of agree with you. I've been thinking about it lately and trying to figure out why i haven't been able to open up and it's certainly not fair on you to let things go on the way they are. I thought that i would, given time, fall in love with you, but you shouldn't have to wait around for that. I do like you a lot and i don't understand why i don't feel the same way as you. You're beautiful, intelligent, funny and you deserve better. I'm sorry if i hurt you and i don't blame you for wanting to break it off.*\n\nWe talked on the phone and he said that he really liked me but wasn't in love :(\n\nDo you think I should just stay friends and hope that maybe he will see in my a different light?", "summary": "Wasn't happy with how intimate relationship was not getting, found out boyfriend wasn't in love with me ... do you think I have a chance in the future."}
{"id": "t3_2sijos", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU 'cause I got high.", "post": "So I get home from work yesterday at around 3pm when my buddy calls me up and tells me to swing over to his place to check out his new IPA home brew that was finishing up. I get over to his pad and we take some samples and its pretty good stuff. Afterwards he tells me that he also had made some serious brownies (the best kind).  Now the problem here is that I was starving and my stomach was empty, so not only was the IPA hitting my instantly, but an hour or so later I start taking a magic carpet ride through the universe of mind, body, and spirit. I occasionally dabble, but I was at an honest [9] and at one point was going through this:\n\nSo anyway. The day is a complete blur and I find myself waking up at 6:00am to get ready for work. I stroll in about an hour later, feeling fine, when I see my boss who gives me a super confused look.  He comes over to me and asks me if I'm feeling alright. \"Yeah, I guess I do, why?\" I ask.  \"Because you left me a message last night saying you wouldn't be able to make it in today.\" After some really hard thinking, an awkward pause that lasted what felt like several hours, and me babbling about something complete irrelevant, he just nods and walks away. \n\nI just got off the phone with my buddy and he said that I had called in to work after I realized I had to bike home 6 blocks and didn't think I would be able to make it back home in time for work tomorrow...", "summary": "I got so high the day before I forgot I had called in to work. Thought 6 blocks was 60 miles and it would take days to get home."}
{"id": "t3_239glp", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21 F] with my boyfriend [21 M] 2 months, I still get tongue-tied around him when I try to say things like 'I like you'.", "post": "I got together with my boyfriend a little less than two months ago. Things are awesome, and I'm really happy, and he's a great boyfriend. I want to let him know that, but I have trouble expressing affection. \n\nI'm making an effort to be more tactile/physically affectionate, and I think that I'm doing an okay job, but I also want to communicate that I really like him in a clear and unambigous manner.\n\nI get disproportianately nervous because we can both be scarcastic people and we knew eachother in a more antagonistic capacity before getting to be friendly. I think that I'm having trouble leaving the old attitude of 'don't make yourself vulnerable' behind.\n\nI also have trouble putting my thoughts and feelings into words.\n\nAny advice?", "summary": "I get tongue-tied around my boyfriend when I try to say nice things to him, and I'm bad with words in general. Help would be greatly appreciated."}
{"id": "t3_1wugv8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23M] with my ex gf [23F] almos2 years , broke up because she doesnt feel the same", "post": "I recently broke up with my gf of 2 years. I have been trying to focus on myself and is honestly trying to improve myself. But sometimes i wonder what will happen when i see her again. \n\nShe broke up with me because she doesnt feel the same way anymore. That she fell out of love. She said that when she see me she doesnt think i am hot and she wants me to be her boyfriend anymore. that she see me as more of a good friend. I am confused on how this can happen.the worst thing is that just a few days prior she told me she love me so much. I think its just the infatuation period ending. Thats part of the problem. I wonder if things would have been different at a different time\n\nWe were having a tough time previously and actually took a break. But during the break she was more affectionate that she had been in a long time\u3002when i pointed that out she said she was fooling herself. \n\nI want to just focus on myself. But sometimes i daydream about her reaction when she see the improved me. This makes me feel like i am motivated to improve cuz of her and not for myself. I want to just get over this and move on with my life.", "summary": "Ex-gf broke up because she doesnt see me as a boyfriend anymore. Confused on how that happens. Just want to move on."}
{"id": "t3_pwylv", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, can you help me reunite two old friends?", "post": "Through CouchSurfing.org, I have been planning a trip to Spain.  The woman that I am staying with in Cordoba is named Antonia and she is 56 years old.  She's asked me to help her find her old friend named Edward Carlson, who she did a lot of travelling with and has lost contact with.  Since she doesn't really know how to use computers, she asked me to help her, but I can't find anything on Facebook or Google, and I'm not really great at stalking people down.\n\nI think it would make her really happy if she could talk to her friend again.  This is the information she's given me:\n\nEdward Carlson, from New York City, used to live at 309, Avenue C and also at 17, Honey Lane, Miller Place in Long Island.  He served with the Peace Corps in the Tonga Islands in around 1973/1974.  He owned a sailboat named Erewhon, which my friend Antonia sailed on with him.  Antonia thinks that he is probably just over 60 years old now.\n\nPlease let me know if you can help me find Antonia's old friend!  She would be very happy and she's been trying to find him for a very long time :)  Thanks, Reddit!", "summary": "If you are good at finding long lost friends through the internets and would like to help out a nice middle aged lady, read this. :)"}
{"id": "t3_38qsc2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [22 F] feel like my boyfriend [22 M] of three years has been using me.", "post": "We've been together for close to three years now, living together for two of those years. All of a sudden, he stopped being able to pay his rent and I took up his part of the share. (Big mistake, since once this pattern started it never stopped). Since he is still a student, I could make excuses for this, and he still payed for some bills where he could help and genuinely was helpful.\n\nHe quit his job several months ago at my bequest to spend more time with me as we were doing fine on money and he was working a ton to be making minimum wage. Then, emergencies came up and money has been scarce since then. There always seems to be too much month left at the end of my monthly paychecks. We've tried budgeting, but even now I'm not sure how to pay the bills that are left for this month.\n\nI've asked him to get a job about a month ago and I feel like he's not taking me seriously. I am seriously considering breaking up as he brings along some seriously expenses and I feel like I am digging myself into a huge hole of debt. I told him today that I was ashamed of him, and I have been unable to respect him since he doesn't seem to put forth much effort. \n\nAm I at fault for telling him to quit his low paying job in the first place? How else can I help encourage him to find a job without it stressing him out so much he won't bother applying? Should we break up due to the money issues because it will make my financial load lighter?", "summary": "Money problems and having trouble paying the bills are causing me doubt in a long term relationship. Considering breaking up to lighten the financial load.."}
{"id": "t3_2s3vn3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 F] with my best friend [20 F] of 3 yrs, she broke up with her bf of 2 months three months ago. Since then she wont stop talking about him or feeling sorry for herself and im beginning to feel fed up.", "post": "For the 2 months after her breakup I was fully supportive of my friend. I unconditionally agreed with whatever she had to say about her ex, even if i knew she was wrong. I gave her all the sympathy I could; I was'there for her'.\n\nBut here we are three or so months later, and still she goes off about her ex almost daily, making small-minded comments about how he did her wrong that just really make me want to scream. Her ex didn't really do much wrong, yet she insists on referring to him like he stole everything from her and ran. \n\nIve tried to give my friend alternative ways of viewing her situation after she makes all these doom and gloom comments. Im really tired of playing into her mindset of, \"my ex is such a dick, feel sorry for me, the world hates me.\"  I really wish she could see it as, \"my ex left and who cares why because it's over now. Feeling sorry for myself solves nothing, so id better move on and allow myself to heal. There are other people out there for me.\" But anytime i approach any of those concepts with her, she shoots me down and i am labeled a bad friend who is supposed to just cater to what she wants to hear (that her ex is a buttface and i should just feel sorry for her). One big factor is she believes shes always right, never wrong. She thinks i should treat her word as gospel which makes it impossible to bring up opposing view points.\n\nI dont know what to say to her. It makes me cringe every time her ex is brought up because i already know what she wants me to say. I hate it. Im tired of letting her play the victim. I really wish she would get over her *first ever* ex whom she dated a measley 2 months. But no matter how gently i try to coax her away from her rut of playing the wronged victim i always get shot down.\n\nHow can approach this subject with her *without* any hostility arising?  What do i do?", "summary": "best friend cant stop talking about her ex and im tired of her feeling sorry for herself. It's almost all we ever talk about"}
{"id": "t3_2sk3uo", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Is he (30m)busy or doesn't want to talk to me(20f)?", "post": "I recently got together with a guy. We got along swell, have tons in common, never a dull moment. Last time I saw him we talked about our expectations from the relationship. I told him I like to hear from his regularly and I like goodnight calls. Things were fine, ever since them he never talks to me. In a week I've heard from him like every other day. He says he's just been busy, but too busy to say \"hey ill be busy\"? \n\nDo you think he is just busy or should I just break things off with him? I'm not particularly attached to him, I'm not really even angry at him. Its too soon to have strong feelings for him. I just dont want to be that stupid little girl that doesn't know when I'm not wanted.", "summary": "Dating a new guy, he drops off the face of the planet all of a sudden, should I take a hint and leave or should I give him time to explain himself if he does choose to talk to me again?"}
{"id": "t3_4s9ct1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Serious advice needed.", "post": "My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years. Everything is good for the most part, but I'm having some concerns. We don't have sex very often at all. Most of the time he just wants me to take care of his needs and that's it. It's been 6 months or longer since my needs have been taken care of. I don't understand why he doesn't think about me when it comes to sex. It is always making sure he is taken care of. I use to say something about it when we first started dating, but it made him really mad when I brought it up, so I stopped bringing it up. Its extremely frustrating. I'm 19 years old and my hormones are raging all the time. Why won't he take care of me? Why is it such a big issue when I bring it up?", "summary": "my boyfriend is all about himself when it comes to sex. Why won't he take care of my needs and why is it such a big issue when I bring it up?"}
{"id": "t3_1xeo82", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "10 years IT Experience but 2 months unemployed...", "post": "Hello Reddit! \n\nI need some job-hunting advice and I was hoping this subreddit could give me a fresh take on the situation.  Background: I lost my contract job as a Sr. Systems Admin in December due to the dissolution of my department and I've been looking for work since.  The problem has been that my last job before this one was also contract and also one in which I was let go before the end of the contract term.  That unemployment stretch lasted about three months.  During that time, I applied to about 15-20 jobs per week and had an interview roughly every week and a half.  \n\nThis time around, with more experience and the same level of effort, I have had a total of 3 interviews, but these were not direct hires so I'm faced with the same risks as I have been at the last two positions. I've been targeting System admin/SQL developer/Business Analyst and Jr DBA-type positions both locally and out-of-state. Honestly, I'm not sure if it's my resume or the positions I'm applying to (or the fact that I don't have a CS degree), but I was really hoping for some feedback/advice on what I can do to get some interest.\n\nPlease see the redacted resume below.", "summary": "Started working in IT since high school, fast forward ten years and I have been unemployed for the second time in this past year. Not sure what to do to get interest and get a job."}
{"id": "t3_zsib5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Tell a girl I'm seeing about my criminal record?", "post": "I'm a 20 year old boy going into second year in college and am seeing a girl who is in 1st year of college and is 17. We're not in a relationship yet but id like to eventually have that with her. \nThe problem is though, that almost a year ago, I was in a drunken fight with someone over a girl and I hit him with a bottle of beer and was convicted of assault in april. But I'm only getting my community service done now and to make matters worse, its in the town that she lives in but she doesnt even know about the fight.\nIt seems likely that she will eventually find out. Many of the people who know, know her too and one or two were there and arent my friends and have told others about the fight to undermine me making friends (this has only happened once I think). I'm afraid that she will be freaked out by what I have done.\nsince the fight, I haven't attempted to or actually made any kind of emotional connection with a girl, but have been with close to 50 girls in the past year. I saw no reason to want to talk to them after I had gotten them but I've started to care for this one.\nI want to eventually be able to tell her about it because it wouldn't be smart to keep a secret this big from someone when it was extremely likely that she will find out, but i want to show her that what I did i'snt a reflection of who I really am before I tell her.\n\nshould I leave it sooner or later before telling her or should I just avoid telling her?", "summary": "was in a fight over a girl, new girl doesnt know and want to know if I should tell her before or after we start a relationship."}
{"id": "t3_czvi4", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Have I got it all wrong?", "post": "Obvious throw away account because I post and comment allot and just need some quick advice. \n\nSo a while ago I made an OKCupid account and started talking to some people there. I met this one girl who seemed really awesome. We started meeting up and have become quite good friends. \n\nAbout a month ago I invited her over to my place to hang out, watch a movie, jam on guitar etc etc. The evening went really well and when she sent me a message not 10 mins after leaving saying that she really enjoyed herself. So, I bit the bullet and decided to tell her how I felt. All I got from her was that we have loads in common but she's happier with us as friends at the moment. I was kind of bummed because we seemed to get on so well and have something going. \n\nThinking that was it, I put it out of my mind (after much difficulty) and got on with things. We went out again just before I graduated and spent the entire day together walking in London and sitting around in parks. It was really great and it's frustrating how well we get on, knowing that she doesn't want anything more.\n\nAfter this I went travelling for a few months (post-graduation trip). Whilst I was away she got in touch asking me out again. This is where my problem is, we went out and again spent hours just sitting around chatting. I can't help but think maybe I've done something wrong, or have I just got the wrong idea? I asked her out to a gig tonight and even though she's got something else on she's cutting it short to come and hang out. I just don't know what to think. When we're together things seem amazing but when I asked her about it she wasn't so sure. \n\nI should say that she's very shy and I believe her previous relationship was quite a serious long one (5 years or so).\n\nThanks for any advice the great hive mind of Reddit can give!", "summary": "met girl online. Hang out all the time. She says she hasn't thought of anything more than friends, but makes a huge effort to hang out for hours."}
{"id": "t3_2ijn3m", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by doing to myself a \"medieval punishment\" at school. (it was actually yesterday)", "post": "background: live in Israel and go to a class of autistic middleschoolers in Raanana, even though i live in Even Yehuda (small suburban town).\n\nstory: so i get a little hyperactive and careless, and i am also in the middle of an emotional roller coaster. and i tried getting to my class, and there were people on the stairs. so instead of being patient and waiting for them to clear the way, i tried jumping over them, and kicked one of them in the leg. after the incident i ran to the class and looked for ways to do to myself \"medieval punishment\" (or harming somebody who harmed as punishment). started punching myself in the leg. then after a while where i thought it didn't hurt enough, i took a fork and stabbed myself in the arm. it caused damage to my skin but i wasn't bleeding. i hid under the table of the microwave for 5 minutes and then decided, to get to English lesson, but the teacher stopped me, and brought me to the computer forcing me to write an essay about the value of life. after 2 lessons that i was writing the essay, my grandmother came and brought me back to Even Yehuda.\n\nSo now i am expelled from school until i go to a psychiatrist.", "summary": "stabbed myself in the arm as \"medieval punishment\" for harming others accidentally, and now i am expelled until further notice from a psychiatrist."}
{"id": "t3_lfpok", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Another marriage question.. What if we just did away with them? Pros/cons/thoughts???", "post": "There is no such legal contract as a marriage anymore.. at all. You could \"marry\" ANY consenting adult, but it's just a personal thing. No religious (which i guess is where marriage originated)/legal consequences at all.\n\nNo marriage tax breaks for anyone. Divorce would be more like a normal break-up, just a decision to no longer be together.\n\nAn SO would not have claim to any of your stuff unless you signed a different contract saying so.\n\nAn SO would not be the guardian of your children unless you went through the appropriate legal channels, whatever they may be.\n\nAn SO would be included in your health insurance only if you purchased health insurance that included such an option.\n\nNote: alternate tax breaks could be introduced/reinforced. ex. a larger tax break for having a child dependent on you, but only legal guardians get it. everyone else in the marriage pays normal individual tax rates.", "summary": "as far as the gov't is concerned, all adults are just individuals. no legal binding whatsoever for SOs."}
{"id": "t3_393nsz", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU (Actually TIFOIFU: Today I Figured Out I'd F'd Up)", "post": "anyway, here goes. Over the past few months, and with increasing regularity, I've been receiving prank calls on my cell phone. Always from a different number, and from area codes all over the U.S., but every call comes from some smart-ass adult, saying they were from some Automotive group, or something of the sort. At first they sounded completely legit, but then they'd ask to speak with Bob. Since I'm not Bob, I'd tell them there's no one here named Bob, you have the wrong number. They would repeat my number back to me, and say they wanted to speak to Bob Zurncle. (Bob's Your Uncle, just in case you missed it) Needless to say, this has become increasingly annoying, especially since the caller is going through a lot of trouble, spoofing fake area codes, and always using this horribly stereotypical fake Hindi accent. Today I received another one of these calls and I'd had enough. I answered, and right away they asked for Bob's Ur Uncle, and I snapped, started cussing a streak, yelling, asking why they didn't have anything better to do with their life, when I hear a woman on the line, saying please sir, let me explain. Our records show that you filled out an online request for an auto insurance quote back in January, and you submitted it with, what is now obviously fake name Bob Zuruncle, but apparently you used your real phone number, hence the calls. \n\nJibber's Crabpst, I do stupid well.", "summary": "T.I.F.U. by asking telemarketers to prank call me, asking for Bob's-Your-Uncle."}
{"id": "t3_tehlw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I take my anger out safely?", "post": "I am the type of guy who really no matter what (excluding physical violence) will basically cop anything on the chin. I'll argue a little bit but as soon as I feel myself about to snap I quickly change the subject. This for me is a must because whenever I snap I basically go ape-shit. I've punched holes through doors, dented walls, broken the nearest thing to me in the most satisfying way possible etc.  One person I have never snapped with however is my girlfriend of 3 and a half years. I've always warned her of my temper but until tonight she's never really believed me or seen it as I'm the 'nice guy' by nature. But tonight she really really got me going and I snapped and picked up the closest thing to me, threw it at the closest door and then proceeded to throw a huge punch at the closest door, which fell of it's hinges (it's a flimsy sliding door). She basically burst into tears once she saw what I did.\n\nNow I don't want her to ever have to see this side of me again but I'm sick of having all this anger slowly building up inside and then letting it all unleash in one go, however when I try to talk about my problems I can't talk about just one I start to compound them together and basically wind myself up to the point of a burst of anger like mentioned above.\n\nWhat can I do to help myself with my anger issues?", "summary": "I have quietly let my anger build, then when I can't take it let it out in a huge burst, how can I manage my anger better?"}
{"id": "t3_dwiu6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Going to San Fransisco with two girls tomorrow. (xpost from /r/needadvice)", "post": "So a casual acquaintance, who just so happens to be a girl, asked me to go to San Fransisco tomorrow with her and her friend. Now, I am pretty awkward around women. I've had one girlfriend and she dumped me because I never talked to her. That was 4 years ago but to be honest nothings really changed. It's an 8 hour drive and I'm pretty nervous. I've never met her friend and we're staying at the girl i knows' friends' parents house. I'm pretty sure the girl who invited me was/ still is interested in me. She has a boyfriend now who just so happens to live next door to me (she was hanging out with him when she asked me). So i guess i just need some encouragement or helpful advice on what to do in this situation.", "summary": "I'm an akward 19 y/o with no real women experience taking an 8 hour road trip and spending two days with two girls."}
{"id": "t3_2ep3et", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [23 M/F] 2 months, Should I be worried my LDR is failing?", "post": "So I'm in a long distance relationship and things were going really well at the beginning. We would skype hours on end and make sure we keep in contact with each other. \n\nThis all changed when she started preparing for school a month ago. She started to say she was just too busy to talk but she would at least still respond to my texts or snapchats. We would talk on the phone every now and then but not as often.\n\nShe is now in her first week of school and she says she is really busy. She has to make all As because she is spending money she does not have to go there. She is also joining clubs and trying to become a CA (Community Assistant) and not have to pay for room and boarding. \n\nSo obviously she is really busy and I am trying to be understanding about that. But we planned a trip (first time visit) about three weeks ago to where I would finally come up and see her and meet her family. She sounded so excited when we were planning it and even started counting down the days. Now she's thinking of canceling the trip because she's not sure if she can balance school and a weekend trip.\n\nI won't get a text or anything all day. I have to initiate all of our conversations and she doesn't sound as lively as she did before this period. All the emotion has been drained out of her texts even though some posts online are filled with emotion. Her responses to me are very to the point now. She says she is stressed and I'm trying to understand. \n\nI ask several days in advance even if she'll be free on Friday (a day where she has no school) to have a catch-up phone conversation. She says she doesn't know at this point.   \n\nI suffer from depression and anxiety so I'm not sure if I'm overreacting or if there are any legitimate concerns that I need to be stressing out over.\n\nAlso maybe some advice to better handle this situation?\n\nI care about her and want her to succeed. I'm worried that she is thinking she can't handle a relationship while in school.", "summary": "Communication is decreasing ever since my girlfriend started school./Is there anything I need to be worried about or is this just my anxiety?"}
{"id": "t3_26ho3d", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "40 m with my 42f 7.5 year relationship, spark gone but I want to look after her - complicated", "post": "My gf and I have become best friends over the 7.5 years we have been together. The spark is gone for me. We have not been intimate for 2 years. When I tried a year ago I found I just wasn't attracted to her physically. However,  we are comfortable. She has a low paying job but great benefits. She is very introverted, has 1 other friens besides me, and never leaves the house but for work. But she looks after me, cares for me, and is incredibly comfortable at our apartment.\n\nI am catch. We have both gained weight. I snore, I am medicated for being bipolar, I am a slob and an overly critical jerk. But I want to protect and look after her. I write smutty erotica for fun online and someone who became a fan contacted me. Upon exchanging a few emails I found myself ashamed of potentially hurting my girlfriend and immediately cut off contact,  deleting that email address. But it got me thinking that I am unhappy.\n\nI want kids. She does not. I want to travel. She does not. I like parties and crowds of friends. She does not. I spend most of my time at home watching tv with her or playing video games... but I am miserable.\n\nif we break up, she has no where to go. She is from a state far away and her parents are too poor to support her.\n\nI am going to try and get the spark back, even take viagra, but I would rather split as lovers and become great friends. She is too proud for that. It would hurt her and I would rather suffer than hurt her.\n\nhelp. Anyone dealt with this?  If I split, advice on how and what to say?", "summary": "I love her, but maybe not romantically. If I break up with her she is emotionally and financially in peril. What do I do."}
{"id": "t3_1e9jhf", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Is this a bad sign? or nothing really (23m, 21f)", "post": "I want to preface this all by saying I am a compulsive worryer \n\nI've been seeing this one girl for about a month. We've hung out once a week, and last week we had sex (on Friday). It was great. Saw each other again Saturday night in a more casual setting but nothing really accumulated. We were both tired from the night before. Made tentative plans to hang out tonight.\n\nI called her up earlier to confirm and she said she's busy 'applying for jobs' and doesn't want to 'break her groove.' That's fine I guess but I was a little confused because if we're leaving at 6 or 7 to hang out, isn't that enough time? Also she said she's probably going out later tonight but I didn't push that issue or ask anything and she only mentioned it once. \n\nI said that if she wants to hang out this week, then it's her prerogative to organize it. She said that since it's grad week she'll probably be busy on the weekend (I said I'm probably going to graduation since my good friend is graduating, partially true) but during the week if she hears of any bbqs or whatever she'll let me know. \n\nI don't know if she's being sincere or not but idk what to think of this. Last time we went out casually it was at a bar. I might have done something stupid like not buy her a drink (the night after we had sex for the first time) but I didn't think it was that big of a deal... is this bad? or is it nothing", "summary": "Am \"dating?\" a girl. She bails on plans for tonight but has tentative plans with her friends. Doesn't really clue me in on much at all and leads me to worry"}
{"id": "t3_28qy54", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21M] went on a drunk tinder spree and my one year girlfriend [20F] found it the next day", "post": "The title describes it all. I turned 21 recently and have taken a liking to drinking in the evenings, especially since I'm home on leave. I leave for training for about three months tomorrow. My girlfriend and I were going to spend my last night together getting a fancy dinner when she pulled up tinder on my phone and found some pretty dirty conversations. \n\nI feel awful. I downloaded the app while drinking alone last night for fun. Girls offered me their phone numbers unsolicited and wanted to snap chat dirty photos. One even suggested meeting up that night. I politely declined all contact outside of the app.\n\nI wouldn't have done this sober. In fact, I won't be drinking for a while as I'm leaving for military training anyway. I thought it would be fun to drink alone on my second to last night home but didn't expect myself to have dirty conversations with other women.\n\nMy girlfriend is very upset (rightfully so). We want to works things out though. Reddit, what advice do you have to offer? I really love this girl and wouldn't want to be with anyone else other than her. I feel so stupid.", "summary": "Girlfriend found dirty tinder conversations on my phone after a night of drinking alone. We want to work things out before leaving for three months of training."}
{"id": "t3_2t3tlq", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Employer is downsizing then moving out of state... How to get laid off?", "post": "My employer of +5 years is owned by a larger parent corporation. Our small company is not meeting profit margins and is planned to be sold to another corporation in in an adjacent state. Significant layoffs are expected. I am told I am on the \"keep employed\" list, but the commute would be far, far to much for me (+3 hours each way). It may also be noted the \"keep\" list of employees are planned to be around for a year (or less) transition period, so moving closer to the new location is kind of off the table. If I am offered a job at the new location, and refuse in some way, am I not eligible for the severance pay the other layoff employees will receive?", "summary": "How can I ensure I get laid off and receive severance pay instead of kept, during a company downsizing and relocation to a place way to far away for me?"}
{"id": "t3_54xkjw", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24f] recently joined a tennis league with lots of older women. Opponents [40s+] keep questioning my age. How to respond?", "post": "Like the title says, I'm 23. I look my age. I recently decided to get back into tennis since I stopped playing throughout college and wanted to introduce some sort of athletic activity into my life while avoiding my least favorite things in the whole world: getting fat and running. Everyone on my league team is very nice, although I do seem to be the youngest. (Ages range from 27 - 40s.) That's fine and no one has made comments.\n\nThe past couple weeks we've had matches against other teams that seem to consist of older women (40s - 60s). At each of these matches, one of my opponents has, at some point, asked: \"Are you even 18?!\" I don't really understand why they're saying this - to discredit me if me and my partner are winning? - but they're often very persistent. Not persistent enough to question my presence on the team, but enough to make me uncomfortable with their faux-joking. \n\nEven though it makes me uncomfortable in the moment, this isn't hovering over me or haunting my dreams. I just need some suggestions on how to shut this kind of thing down, especially with some quippy one-liner or something. I wrote the first time off but am now 2 for 2 at matches and so want to be prepared for the next time, since I'm assuming there will be one. Last time it happened, I tried to ask if they wanted to see my birth certificate but I don't think they really heard me. Awkward.", "summary": "Older women tennis opponents keep accusing me of not being 18 even though I am a full-blown grown-up woman with the student debt to prove it? Pretty irritating and need some clever comebacks to shut them down."}
{"id": "t3_23ul3m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm (20f) living in a de facto relationship with my partner (20f). Are we always expected to split payments 50/50?", "post": "I've been living with my girlfriend for almost a year, we've been together for 2.5 years and have usually just split every cost down the middle, which I've been very happy with so far. However, she's decided not to go to college and work long hours instead. I'm in college, working full time hours when I can and doing a course on the weekends and doing unpaid work sometimes. She also gets money from her family every week as well as from her job and has her own business. Some friends have said that seeing as we're living together, we should be pooling our income. What are your thoughts? I can give you more info if you need.", "summary": "girlfriend and I are living together  and she gets paid for more of the week, but not through lack of effort on my part. Should we still be splitting payments (bills, rent, groceries) 50\\50?"}
{"id": "t3_1iis02", "subreddit": "Parenting", "title": "Need advice - Divorced, non-custody dad, got a job offer in another state", "post": "I've been out of steady employment since January of 2011.  It's been a mixture of bad employer experiences, but mostly really bad personal choices.  Way behind on child support, I haven't been able to make a full payment in quite some time and it absolutely guts me that I don't have the means to make sure my children are taken care of.  I've spent the last few weeks refocusing on what I need to do to take care of my kids.  I'm divorced with two kids.  I don't have full custody, just every other weekend.  \n\nThis morning I was offered a job in New Mexico (I live in Louisiana).  The pay would be double that of what I've made at any job in the past so I would absolutely have the means to fulfill my responsibilities.  I just hate the idea of being away from my kids, but I could always fly home on weekend.  As with any normal parent, my kids are the two most important people in my life and even not seeing them for two weeks is hard enough.  Do I take this job and make sure they're set up for life, or do I try to stick it out here and hope I can land a minimum wage job (I work in TV news, there are two stations around here but they won't hire me as I was laid off from one of them).", "summary": "Got an amazing job offer in another state but don't want to miss being in my kids' lives, however, I'm unemployed down here, can't support them like I need to, and job prospects are very dim."}
{"id": "t3_2x1w38", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'[M25] absolutely terrified of getting into another committed relationship after previous disaster.", "post": "My last relationship was almost 4 years ago. I haven't even spoken to another girl since then until recently. I met someone who is shaping up to be absolutely amazing and i've never, ever had this much in common with anyone. Not even my close friends. I'd hesitate to use the word perfect as nobody is perfect but she could just be perfect for *me*.\n\nNow we get to the bad part. When my last relationship fell apart, my life did too. I gained 9 stone, 4 of which i've managed to lose in the last few months. I became incredibly depressed and contemplated taking my own life on several occasions. I didn't handle it well at all. I absolutely hated myself. Words cannot describe the resentment I felt when I looked in the mirror.\n\nIt was as if every little problem i'd ever had culminated into one giant one and weighed me down entirely. I didn't have a life for several years and never even saw my friends or family for over 2. I made the conscious decision that i'd never, ever put my self in a position where I could get that hurt again as I slowly started to pick up the pieces of my life.\n\nFour months ago I went on anti-depressants and things felt better, most of the time that is. I started exercising, I started losing weight. I started to realise that I was a bit lonely and I wanted to explore relationships again.  \n\nLittle did I know i'd meet someone who is a perfect match for me. Now i'm full of fear & doubt. So many negative questions flood my mind. Sometimes when she compliments me I feel it inside. The little voice that tells me i'm worthless and shouldn't listen to what she says. Other times I feel on top of the World, like nothing can bring me down.\n\nI'm confused. I'm feeling vulnerable and undeserving of happiness and I was just wondering if anyone had any advice to help me come to terms with whats going on. Everything has been going right lately but I still feel down. Life has only just started getting better, I couldn't bear to see the lights get shut off for another 4 years.", "summary": "Became depressed and life stalled after last relationship. Gained loads of weight, lost contact with everyone. Didn't want to live. Recent improvements lead to an amazing girl. I feel like shit despite everything going well."}
{"id": "t3_2htqfu", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "[19/f] worrying about whether I can handle months apart in the future with my [20/m] boyfriend", "post": "I submitted this to /r/relationship_advice yesterday and received no response. So I'm posting it here in hopes that someone will respond.  \n\nI'm not sure if there's a bunch of pessimists on this subreddit; I haven't visited here much. So, please, if you're going to be negative don't respond.  \n\nI have been with my boyfriend for a year now. In the past, I have never pictured myself ending up with anyone, I always ran away or avoided relationship situations. When I met him, something inside of me melted. He is everything I secretly wanted but was too afraid to find. He just appeared when I least expected it and I couldn't be happier.  \n\nAnyways, fast forward to now. He's going to college to become a shipping merchant, working in the engine room. When he graduates, he will have a job that requires him to work a month on/month off. He is doing this to pursue his dream of having enough money and time to travel. What we both want in our futures is to travel. I know some of you may be thinking I'm naive or fooling myself, but I know that this is the love of my life. It doesn't make sense to be with anyone else. Being with him is right. The only thing is, is that I'm afraid that I won't be able to handle being alone for a month at a time. I know that in order to be with him this is how it would have to be. Basically, either handle being apart so we can be together, or not have him at all. I can't imagine a life without him. I know it's a ways down the road, but this is the only thing that could tear us apart, and I don't want that to happen. We have reached the point in our relationship where we see each other in one another's futures; it just makes sense. I don't want to lose him because being apart is something I'm not able to handle.  \n\nBasically, any advice/similar stories/anything would be helpful.", "summary": "How can I handle being away from my boyfriend with a job that requires him to work a month on/month off?"}
{"id": "t3_zpfp9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Are some people just incapable of love?", "post": "My SO (21) and I (20) have been together for over a year and 6 months. The one thing that really interests me is how difficult he finds it to say I love you, to anyone really. He was bullied a lot as a kid and conditioned himself to stop feeling so the bullies couldn't hurt him.\n\n'Love' hasn't been an issue between us at all because I accept that it's hard for him to say it and when I say it myself, I don't expect him to say it in return.\n\nA year ago he did tell me he loved me and I was shocked but after a while he stopped saying it. I was worried that he stopped having feelings for me, so last night I asked him if he did love me because I've been confused about what his feelings are towards me. He shrugged and told me that he doesn't know what love is and doesn't know if he's feeling it. I then asked why he said it to me earlier in our relationship and he said that he thought that I wanted him to say it. I told him he was crazy for thinking that and that I didn't care if he couldn't say it. But he says he feels guilty that he can't say it because then he feels like everything is one sided (which it isn't).\n\nI thought about us today and realised that although he can't say it, he's shown it. During some off our worst fights (in cases where most guys would up and leave) he couldn't bare to leave me (even though he thought about it) and he was there for me when I was at my worst (he's always tolerant) he'll always want cuddles, be happy to drive me when I need him to (he hates driving), buy me flowers, pay for dinners, cook for me, the list goes on. A word to me doesn't matter because he treats me well. I'm not saying we are perfect, we're probably worse than must when we get into huge fights but will always stick around for the other.\n\nDoes anyone have a similar relationship? I don't know what I can do to make him realise saying I love you or thinking you can't feel love towards someone isn't an issue for me?", "summary": "boyfriend is incapable of love and it doesn't bother me but he feels guilty about not being as emotionally available  as I am."}
{"id": "t3_p452w", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "how should I get back at my cruel coworker?", "post": "So there's this guy at work that I've had a crush on and have been flirting with for about the past month. He's been consistently flirting back and generally acting like he likes me. Today, I found out that apparently he's just been playing games, which is shitty on its own, but I also found out that another girl we work with (who has a crush on him, after previously having a crush on his twin brother and just about every other attractive guy that works with us) has been 100% encouraging him to play these games and is actively plotting against me. They're currently convinced that I dyed my hair strawberry blonde just to impress him (not true; he did suggest it, but I actually polled everyone at work that day, and strawberry blonde was by far the most popular choice), and are presently conspiring to get me to dye my hair some other color just to see if I'll do it, and are trying to think of other things they can convince me to do, by having the guy ask/suggest that I do these things. The guy's twin brother and another mutual friend finally had enough of them treating me like shit, so today they told me exactly what's going on, and I'm pissed enough that I want some satisfying revenge.\n\nMy current plan is to divert all my attention, in an obvious way, from the evil twin to the nice twin This should piss off both of them, since the evil twin just wants my attention, and the girl is extremely territorial over \"her boys\", which includes both of the twins. I may also get the nice twin in on this, since he's sick of how they're treating me and he's also a bit of a troublemaker himself.\n\nMy question is this: does anyone have any good ideas on how to exact revenge? I rarely see the three of them outside of work all at the same time, so whatever I do, it has to be vaguely work appropriate. And I'm aware that this is petty, and that I'm definitely not being the bigger person her, but idgaf at this point.", "summary": "coworker and I like the same guy; coworker is convincing guy to fuck with me and take advantage of me as much as possible; need to exact revenge. Suggestions?"}
{"id": "t3_198srm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Need advice on pursuit of guy or just leave it alone?", "post": "So I'll try to make this short and sweet but no promises. a few months back I (17f) went to a musical and saw a guy from around the various activities. Remembering him, I looked him up on facebook and friended him only to find out that we're pretty much the same person, same likes, same activities, and a mutual friend. I thought that was pretty cool and didn't give it another thought for a while. A few weeks ago at a speech tournament the mutual formally introduced me to him, and I honestly don't even know what happened. I could barely form a sentence , my face flushed, it was almost scary. I decided that I really wanted to go for it.\n\nLater on I got home and contacted him through facebook, and we talked about some stuff we did for school and whatnot. I ended up inviting him to a local play and the conversation ended. About a week later, while being upset about trying to find a prom date, I suddenly got up the courage to ask him out, so I did... As easily predicted he said no, that he was flattered and kudos to me for having the balls but we don't know each other whatsoever. Anyway I still think that maybe I can do something because I'm weird like that, but I was wondering the ladies' input on this kind of thing.", "summary": "I have the hots for a guy I barely know (and evidently so does my psyche) and I'm not sure how to proceed after blowing it."}
{"id": "t3_3nop40", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [28 M] with my datee [33 F] of 3 months, looking for different things but have strong feelings for each other..", "post": "Ok, I met this 33 year old woman a few months ago. We really hit it off and have been seeing quite a lot of each other. I think we both needed a bit of affection in our lives. \n\nThe future of this thing we got going came up. I've never been in a relationship and she is the 1st person I've become this involved with. I've explained that I'm not looking to settle down or have children for a very long time. She's convinced herself she's ok with that. But I know that I won't be the guy to give her children, no matter how long we stay together, and I know she'll become increasingly demanding of such commitment.\n\nWe were discussing whether it was worth seeing each other for any longer. We're both having a really good time together (great sex, great conversations, plenty of excitement) and none of us wants that to stop, but this relationship is essentially going nowhere. I've said it all depends on how long she can tolerate that for.\n\nThe question is, have you ever had a fulfilling short-term relationship with someone even though you both knew it wasn't going anywhere? Was the pain of parting worth the experience? It's coming up to halloween and bonfire night and christmas and it just doesn't seem like a great time to spend alone (though we do both have plenty of friends/family).\n\nMy thought was to have as much fun as we can together for the next few months and then amicably call it off. The only thing is, I don't want it to become even more painful to stop seeing each other. Surely a few months more won't make it much worse than it is now?", "summary": "moved really fast with someone have known for a few months. relationship going nowhere but we don't want it to stop, and want to share as much joy while minimising pain involved in eventually parting ways."}
{"id": "t3_187n3w", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[17/m] How can I meet up with a girl[16/f] again who I met awhile ago and still talk to?", "post": "I met a girl this August at a soccer camp and I decided to ask her for her phone number (mainly because she told me she visits where I live frequently because her aunt lives there). We've been texting each other roughly once a week since then. I haven't seen her in person since camp and I would really like to be in person with her again because she's the first girl I've had a crush on since I was 14. I'm unsure about how to do this because I'm not sure if she's interested enough or if a relationship would work out even if she was interested.\n\nI'm unsure about the interest because in November I decided to tell her I liked her and I never got an explicit response if she liked me back and our conversations are somewhat rare, she has told me recently that she loves our conversations though.\n\nI'm not sure if the relationship is feasible because she lives about an hour and fifteen minutes away (I can drive, she can't) and a majority of her time is taken up by select volleyball(4 practices a week, a tournament almost every weekend). The volleyball also leads me to be unsure about her interest because I can't tell if that's part of the reason for the infrequency of our conversations.\n\nHow should I make an active attempt to see her again or should I wait for her to visit her aunt and see her then?", "summary": "How should I go about trying to see a girl in person again and try to start a relationship with her when I'm not sure if she's interested in me or if we could make a relationship work out."}
{"id": "t3_4i7kl6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend [26F] and friends believe it's racist for me [28M] to be unwilling to seriously date outside my race, how do I deal with this?", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been together for close to a year now. We are both from India originally, but both of our families immigrated to Canada when we were kids. \n\nSo the topic came up while we were talking about our past relationships with a group of friends. We started talking about interracial relationships, and I mentioned how I had never been in a serious  relationship with someone outside my race. Everyone got curious when I stated this, and asked me what the reason was. I responded saying I was unwilling to have a relationship with someone without a similar background to myself, primarily because I feel there would be too many differences to overcome for it to work. I understand it works with many couples, however personally I feel this would not be the case for myself. \n\nAfter my response, everyone, including my girlfriend, remarked how they felt that was really racist for me to say, and that plenty of interracial relationships work in the real world. After we got home, my girlfriend was especially angry with me, stating how she felt that was a complete bigoted view to have. I tried explaining that it wasn't because I believed my race was superior or whatever else, just that I felt everything from food to religion, to cultural values would be too different to fully overcome. She was unwilling to accept that however. \n\nSince that night, it has been tense between my friends, girlfriend, and myself. I can tell my girlfriend is still pissed at me. How should I approach this?", "summary": "Friends and girlfriend feel it's racist that I am unwilling to date someone outside my race, I disagree obviously, how do I deal with this?"}
{"id": "t3_eohk4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Advice on home-brewing!", "post": "I have been a beer lover since about the age of 16 (used to live in Germany) and have developed a strong passion for artisan beer over the last five years. I also rather enjoy cooking I've found as well as professions / hobbies that are ancient to a degree (i.e. baking, black-smithing, being a prostitute :P).\n\nAnyways I will be living in a medium sized single bedroom apartment come June (in Houston) and was hoping to maybe pick up a new hobby with my job. \n\nHow much does an average home-brew kit cost to get started? What should I know before making the investment? What should I avoid? \n\nThanks Reddit!", "summary": "How expensive is home-brewing as a hobby and is it feasible for someone working 40 hours a week in a 750sqft apartment?"}
{"id": "t3_pb0e8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "So, who thinks the 'slow loris likes being tickled' video is cute?", "post": "I know I do! He's [adorable] \nHowever, I must apologise for leading you here under somewhat false pretences. I don't really want to know if you think the video is cute. I want to draw attention to [this](\n\nThis is not good. As Wikipedia so eloquently puts it, 'All five species [of Loris] are listed as either \"Vulnerable\" or \"Endangered\" on the IUCN Red List and are threatened by the wildlife trade and habitat loss'.\n\nAt this point, if you can view [this] video (I assume non-Britons will be unable to, unfortunately) please do so, make sure to chop onions beforehand so you have an excuse for the tears.\nIf not, please direct your attention towards [this] website. \n\nImportant points for people who don't like clicking links:\n\n-Lorises are traded both internationally and domestically as pets, food or traditional medicines.  \n\n-Several thousand lorises are traded in Vietnam, Cambodia, China, Thailand, Myanmar and Indonesia each year. \n\n-Very few lorises survive the trade. They are often kept in terrible conditions, usually in tiny cages. Young infants are taken from thier mothers.\n\n-Lorises have a painful bite so traders often pull out their front teeth with pliers. This carries high risk of infection with few survivors. Lorises that have been rescued from the pet trade cannot be returned to their natural environment if their teeth have been removed.\n\n-Lorises have an amazing ability to produce a liquid from glands under their arms that, when mixed with their saliva, gives the loris a toxic bite, the wound from which is difficult to heal. This makes them the only toxic primate in the world.", "summary": "Lorises are cute, awesome and endangered. Don't get a pet loris and [donate] some money if you want."}
{"id": "t3_2a2hjz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M] with a girl I've been on 2 dates with this week [22 F] known each other for one week, not sure how to respond to being flaked out on.", "post": "So this week we had plans to hang out on Sunday, it was supposed to be a little date where she comes over and we go hiking and then watch a movie at my place, and it wasn't until six PM until she reached me yesterday, saying she left her charger at her friend's house. No big deal, okay, I acted cool even though I was a bit upset, especially when she said she actually made plans for that night, but she suggested \"what about tomorrow?\" I said alright, sounds good, but now it's tomorrow, and I have to be in work in about and hour and twenty minutes. She extended the time of arrival today saying she had some chores and stuff to do, so I said okay. She knew I had work today, unless she forgot.\n\nBUT... we also hung out outside of work twice this week (yes we work together but no longer we will see each other at work because of a schedule change), where she invited me both times. Our second date we were holding hands and I kissed her and everything went well. I have a much longer thread [here] about what's been going on with us, but we seemed to hit it off well so far, so I'm confused on how I should react to all this. Do I play it cool again, let her initiate the next time we hang out, which would be this weekend (when I'm available again), or do I set it up later in the week, or set it up now and take initiative? \n\nAlso I just started talking to her Monday, a week ago, so we *did* hang out twice last week and maybe she just needs some space?", "summary": "Had two great dates this week, flaked out on Sunday and (possibly, minutes are going by) today, not sure how to react."}
{"id": "t3_2s3z7s", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [20's M] girlfriend [20's F] and I are moving in together - she's suggesting letting her brother [19M] live with us", "post": "I currently live in city A, where my girlfriend is from. My girlfriend is in city B for the next couple of years, currently living in residence for school. This April I'm also moving to city B for school - I have 450 hours (1-3 months) of placement before I can work as a registered nurse. Until I'm finished with that and working, I'll be living on student loans. I'm moving to city B for this as placements often lead to jobs - and city B is the place to be. My girlfriend and I are planning on moving in together with a relatively low budget, however it will work out to be the same as if we were living in dorms. Her parents control her finances so we're fairly limited in what we can afford. Recently, her parents suggested that we allow her brother, who's also moving to city B for school, to move in with us. This would allow us to go from renting a small basement apartment to a decently sized unit. I feel like this won't work out smoothly, though. Her brother is a great guy - very quiet, introverted, and spends most of his time in his room. I fear he may feel left out as the third wheel. They get along great and never fight, however aren't very close. Additionally, I fear that with all three of us having social lives the place may be cramped. I was initially excited as moving in with my girlfriend meant us starting our adult lives together - now with her brother it will feel like we're in dorms again. That being said, it would save money and help out her brother as well. He says he doesn't want to impose, but wouldn't mind it as long as we're okay with it. What do you guys recommend?", "summary": "Girlfriend's parents are **heavily** suggesting we let her brother move in with us to save money. Pros include a bigger and better apartment, cons include awkwardness. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_4d4xbs", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do I have the right to feel resentful because my girlfriend [18F] chose her friend over me me [19M] during the basketball game?", "post": "Been with my girlfriend for a month. I asked her to come to the semi final basketball game at school (university) and she didn't even know that it was happening. She said yes and said would come after she wrote her midterm so since she heard from me first, it's wouldn't be unreasonable to assume she'd sit with me.\n\nShe finished her midterm and by the time she was done, the half time approached. No problem, her midterm comes first. However, I put my sweater on the seat beside me to save it for her, and it did make me look sort of selfish considering the gym was packed and that every seat was needed for this attendance. \n\nShe texted me and said that one of her friends was coming. Now I didn't have a problem with that because for the sake of her friend, coming out for a game and being involved is awesome. I only saved one seat though so eventually that friend would have to bug off or at least be close but she wouldn't be able to sit beside us. I understand that my girlfriend wouldn't want to leave her friend alone while she stayed with me, but my gf chose to accompany her rather than me. I was hurt to say the least because I saved that seat, invited her exclusively and now she decided she would rather be with her friend rather than me. If I had known that the friend was coming before the midterm, I would've attempted to save two. \n\nNow for the rest of the game, I have my sweater on my seat and I look like an ass for saving it for my girlfriend who wasn't going to sit there. My friend though it was a douche move. What do you Redditors think? What should I do?", "summary": "I exclusively invite my girlfriend to basketball game. Before the basketball game, her friend decides to come and she chooses to sit with friend instead of me. I have a feeling she's not putting in the effort."}
{"id": "t3_3khj7g", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24F] housemate [26M] took his roommate's [26M] dog for a walk and it attacked another dog, he's really upset", "post": "So my housemate, Rich (lives above me and my boyfriend) has been watching his roommate, Kent's, dog for a week. Usually Kent takes the dog out 4 times a day but does not walk her. Rich works 8-9 hours straight so wasn't able to take her out and the dog went to the bathroom on the floor. He felt really bad about it, so he thought he'd take her for a walk because Kent had talked about taking the dog for a walk soon. While on the walk, the dog launched at another dog and bit onto its neck. Rich put his hand in the dog's mouth and pulled her off. He got cuts on his hand/wrist and there was a lot of blood. The woman even said it wasn't his fault (he told her it wasn't his dog and apologized profusely) ... she took her dog in. The dog had no cuts/bites, the blood was all from Rich.\n\nWell he called Kent who is on vacation who ended up being a dick over it. Saying \"Well you shouldn't have done that\" and that Rich will have to help him pay if the woman wants him to help pay any vet bills. Rich feels terrible and is really upset. Kent never told him he shouldn't take the dog for a walk. Kent made it sound like this has happened before but Rich had no clue.\n\nI guess my question is .. is this in any way Rich's fault? He had no idea. And should he have to pay for any vet bills the woman racked up? The dog never acts aggressive, just apparently does not like other dogs.", "summary": "Housemate walked his roommate's dog, dog attacked someone, housemate feels horrible and like it's his fault but he had no idea"}
{"id": "t3_t7x3r", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Curiosity about promise rings.", "post": "Me and my boyfriend are in a very serious relationship (I'm 20, he's 21) We've been talking to each other every day for almost a year, and have been together for 6 months now. Just recently I was thinking about promise rings, but I'm not sure if he even knows what they are, or if couples even give these to one another anymore. Neither one of us are ready for marriage yet, but I still want to do something like give him a promise ring. We've also both mentioned that we don't want to get married until about 25 or so. \n\nMy question: Would it be a weird thing to get him? Would it scare him a little to know I'm thinking about stuff like that? Has anyone been in a relationship where a partner has given the other a promise ring?", "summary": "I've been thinking about getting a promise ring for my boyfriend, but I don't know if its a silly thing to do or not."}
{"id": "t3_2qa4su", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[18/M] My girlfriend [16/F] said something I can't get off my mind", "post": "So earlier yesterday my girlfriend of about 6 months and I were talking about sex the other day, and she mentioned in graphic detail what she's done before. I knew she was in a (in my opinion) inappropriate sexually active, and illegal in our state relationship with a 23 year old when she was 13, and it was in my knowledge that they were active. As of recently I learned she had another sexual partner after (or before) him that she won't disclose, but I shrugged it off even though they most likely have never dated as it doesn't add up with her previous story. So my problem is I can't stop picturing her with her ex having increasingly rougher and more graphic sex depending on how upset I am about it. I know this is a personal issue, but her ex was such a scumbag and I was so happy with her til now and saw her like as so perfect and like a little angel or something of that matter. Now it's killing me picturing her being a super active sexual deviant before the age of even 16, and it's like eating at me. Her way of making me feel better was by telling me I was \"the nice one\" whom she \"cares most about\", but I've been in this situation with my ex girlfriend and it literally put a huge weight on our relationship and eventually just ripped it in half. I feel the problem enroots in me being very, very calm when it comes to sex and often don't even want it, and now I feel like kind of a pussy whose the \"nice guy\" at the end of a chain of assholes. So I first want to know of a reason to not be so upset, and I want to know how to help this situation before it ruins another relationship, or if I should even be in this relationship?", "summary": "Young girlfriend was very sexually active before me, and i'm feeling very threatened because I have barely any sexual history. This is the second time I've been labeled as the \"nice guy\" within the relationship and I'm hurt."}
{"id": "t3_3yl0iq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My EX (22f) sent me (24m) a 'Merry Christmas' text after 3 weeks of NC. Am I reading into this too much?", "post": "To preface this, she broke up with me and we haven't had contact in 3 weeks since the breakup. \n\nSo the conversation went like this; \n\nHer: Merry Christmas! I hope you get to enjoy time with your family and relax! \n\nMe:Thanks! I'm off until Sunday, so it should be a nice 4 days away from the crazy bin to relax! Butttttt, then I'm going to nightshift. I hope your finals went well and you have a nice Christmas too! \n\nHer: Aw thank you. I got straight a's and got into SUNY and Temple so far. Good luck with night shift, I hope you like it!! \n\nMe: Haha of course you did. You'll get into all of them. I'm probably gonna hate it just because of the boredom and lack of action but it's better for having a life I guess. And I won't get punched in the face on nightshift, I hope. \n\nHer: Punched in the face? It sounds like things have been hard at the jail lately lol\n\nMe: Yeaaaaaa I gave a dude a 24 hr lockdown and he tried to spit on me, so we went in on him to take him to the hole and he clocked me in the jaw hahah oh I love my job. \n\nHer: Awwww well I hope you stay safe and relatively assault-free lol \n\nAnd that was the end of the conversation, I was busy and didn't reply. She responded to all of these texts within literally a minute. \n\nI feel like she would only contact me on Christmas Eve if she was still thinking about me a lot or is still interested in being with me. But maybe that isn't the case. Was I too responsive? Should I have just given her a \"Merry Christmas too\". I just didn't want it to seem like I am bitter or still upset but I want her to take me back more than anything.", "summary": "Ex gf contacted me Christmas eve with a Merry Christmas text after 3 weeks of NC. She responded quickly and seemed to still care a lot about me. What was her reason or motive behind this?"}
{"id": "t3_2uhsb1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I'm[23F] going on dates with a cute guy[23M] who has never dated before. Any advice?", "post": "We've gone on a few dates and we've been texting about our interests these last few days. While I have been away from town (medical reasons: had to have a planned surgery) he opened up to me over a phone call and told me he had actually never dated before and wanted to ask if he was doing ok. Of course I think he is doing just great! (not awkward or anything don't worry) It just left me wondering if I should treat some things more delicately... Although I'm much more experienced than him I've been out of the dating game for QUITE a while. years)\n\nI just wanted to ask if you guys could think of any advice for dating a less experienced guy. Any tips or things I may have forgotten from when I didn't have a clue about dating?\n\nSo far we have only hugged and I want to keep this thing moving nice and slow, but I want to make some moves so that way he can feel comfortable with being closer to me. Does that make sense? Everything is still way to polite and formal for my taste... Although it's great he wants to pay for our dates and open the car door for me...It's just really not something I expect or want to happen forever. So how do I warm this guy up?", "summary": "Recently started to go on dates with a man who has never dated before. He is doing great, but is there any advice, tips, or concerns about dating the less experienced?"}
{"id": "t3_1tvf8l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I think my [21 F] FWB [23 M] is looking for more and I'm not sure if I want it", "post": "I started a FWB relationship with a guy I live with. We tend go beyond just sex though (eg. cook each other meals, cuddle and fall asleep together even without sex, etc.) I overheard him talking to one of my other housemates telling him he practically sees me as his girlfriend and he hates the idea of me sleeping with someone else. He doesn't realize I heard him talking about this. My FWB is a lovely guy, very loyal and caring but I feel like we have nothing to talk about when we're not having sex!! There is always awkward silences and I feel like we don't really click intellectually. But the sex is great. Would you pursue a relationship if you were in this position?", "summary": "I think my FWB wants a relationship. I'm not sure if we click intellectually and we never really talk but the sex is great. Do I go for it?"}
{"id": "t3_32yydb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Sometimes I (19F) don't feel like hanging out with my boyfriend (20M) even though I love him.", "post": "I've always been independent and I love spending time alone. My new boyfriend of nearly 3 months doesn't seem to understand that. How am I supposed to convey my feelings without making him think that I don't love him anymore. When I cancel plans or tell him that I don't want to hang out with him/make excuses not to hang out, he gets angry and upset. \nI'm not sure how I should handle this situation. I know it's only been a short period of time but I love this guy, he is everything to me. \nIs it wrong that I don't want to always be with him? Is it wrong that I don't always want to talk to him?", "summary": "I love my boyfriend but sometimes I just want to be alone. How do I tell him this without him getting upset."}
{"id": "t3_4ctgye", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Did I get stood up and if so what should I do now?", "post": "This might be a bit of a rant but I'm just really confused at this point and I don't know what to do. So here's to start off I'm friends with this female who I've known for years and I never made a move on her. Recently she gave me what I assumed to be hints like direct eye contact and a smile out of the blue. A couple days ago I finally gained the nerve to ask her out to go eat together and she said yes and told me to message her. (Neither of us suggested a friend coming along or anything so I assume it was just one on one). So on the next day it's the go out day and I message her in the morning to meet up with me at ____ later and no response. Later I go there being the hopeful idiot I am and I just wait. Some more waiting.... I message her to ask her if she does plan on coming, no response. I'm pretty sure she was just ignoring my messages at this point... And I eventually go home. Hours later she messages to me that she has a boyfriend and I just... \"Uh ok.\" Next day she greets me and smiles at me like nothing ever happened. At this point I have no idea how to react cause I sorta end up seeing her everyday and yea...", "summary": "I ask girl out, she says message her, I do, I wait, she tells me she has boyfriend after a long time of waiting, she pretends nothing ever happen wit plans for outing"}
{"id": "t3_29nrda", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "I want to take college classes to help my future, but I was home schooled and barely did school work the last few years of it, so I don't know if I could handle it.", "post": "Lately I've been really worried about my future, I'm 19 years old, and I really don't want to work at the grocery store I currently work at for the rest of my life. \n\nI was home schooled, but being careless and stubborn, as teenagers can be, I barely did any work the last few years of my schooling, aside from some self-taught programming. I believe I technically graduated but I'm not 100% sure.\n\nI want to take classes at my local community college, but I'm afraid I won't be able to handle the work they give me due to not doing much work through highschool. Especially the math, science, etc.\n\nWhat I've been interested in doing is taking the general education classes for 2 years at a community college, and depending on how well I do, transfer to a 4 year school to finish up and get a degree in something like computer science. I'd love to do some sort of IT work, I'm good with technology, and I know a good amount just by teaching myself. I feel like I would be able to progress with that type of thing.\n\nAnyway, I don't know how to go about doing any of this. I don't know if I'll be able to pay for it (my family doesn't have money, and I currently work at a grocery store for $8.60/hr) and I don't know if I'll be able to handle the work load because I didn't do much math, science, or any of that stuff. And now I feel like I'm screwed. I'd love any help and insight into my situation!", "summary": "19 years old, was home schooled, didn't do much school work. Want to take classes at community college, but don't know if I'll be able to do the work, or even afford it."}
{"id": "t3_1thnzu", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Redditors. Have you ever been the \"other\" person in a relationship? How did you handle when they suddenly changed face?", "post": "Throwaway, obviously.\nHere's some background.\nThrowawayman2465 was the other guy. He knew. And did it anyway. The girl's boyfriend treats her pretty shittily. Not noticing her, diluting her problems into \"it's just a woman thing.\" All the time. \nHe's an ass. But that doesn't justify it.\nObviously we both feel terrible.\nBut here's the thing. We were amazing friends for a year before this. I mean, every day texting and intimate friends. She is the first person I have ever actually loved. Not in love, but loved.\nSuddenly, two weeks ago. She turns it off. I say anything about my day and the \"what's wrong? What's the matter? Talk to me.\" Is gone.\nShe just gets angry with me at the drop of a hat.\nShe stopped texting me as much and just doesn't give a shit. I keep asking her why and she just says shes not feeling great. While increasing the gulf of distance.", "summary": "Was the other guy, were super close friends, now she suddenly doesn't even seem to like me let alone care. "}
{"id": "t3_2vknv9", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Do I [29F] really need to officially come out to my brother [44M] and his wife[40F]?", "post": "Due to the age difference, I've never been close with my oldest brother.  He moved out at 18 so I never really even got to know him.  I only ever see him at Thanksgiving and we never talk.  I'm a bit closer with his wife, in that we actually have conversations when I see her, which is still only twice a year (I live 2000 miles from where I grew up so I only visit twice a year).\n\nI came out to my parents and my other brother when I was 17.  It took them a bit to get used to it but we're all good now.  They've met two long-term girlfriends of mine, and my oldest brother and my sister-in-law also met them, but they were just introduced as, \"This is [name].\"  It was pretty damn obvious that I was in a relationship with these girls, but nothing was explicitly said.\n\nA few years ago, I moved in with a girlfriend.  We also went on a trip backpacking around Europe together and moved across the country together.  Brother and sister-in-law knew about this.  Again, pretty damn obvious, but again, nothing explicitly said.\n\nOne little thing that might be worth mentioning as backstory: when my brother was in high school, several of my mom's friends came out as gay.  When he found out, he asked my mom, \"You're not going to suddenly say you're gay, right??\"  It gave my mom the impression that he really wouldn't like it, and while I know that a gay sister is totally different from a gay mom, it gives me pause.  When I've asked my mom about coming out to him, she says we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.\n\nIt's starting to feel ridiculous.  I'm planning to bring my current girlfriend home this spring and I would really like to introduce her as, \"my girlfriend, [name].\"  It's all but been said at this point, so can I do that?  It seems unnecessary to say, \"oh, by the way, I'm gay,\" when I'm pretty sure they already know.", "summary": "I've never said the words \"I'm gay\" to my brother and sister-in-law, but I'm pretty sure they know anyway... do I have to actually \"come out\" at this point?"}
{"id": "t3_3n3en4", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend (20F) and I (21M) are abroad for the year but she can't travel because of her parents. Help?", "post": "We've been dating two years and are spending the year abroad in London.  London was the only program that worked for both our majors.  We like the city but we've noticed that all the other students in our program travel on weekends, to other European countries and such.\n\nI've never been out of the country before.  I'd love to see more of Europe, I may never get another chance.  But my girlfriend's parents have prohibited her from traveling.  They said she can take day trips if she's with a large group, but seeing as we don't know the others in our program (we're pretty solitary people) that isn't a possibility.  Overnight trips or plane rides are out of the question.\n\nMy girlfriend wants to travel too, and we've thought about sneaking to go on a trip, but her conscience is killing her.  She wants to try writing an email to her parents begging for permission, but is scared.  She's told me to travel without her, but as much as I want to see Europe I don't want to go without her.  What do we do?", "summary": "Girlfriend's parents are prohibiting her from traveling while on her year abroad.  It's isolating us from most activities and we've gotten quite bored.  We don't know what to do."}
{"id": "t3_3qeewi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my GF[19F] Few weeks, Pressured with disseminating time", "post": "First of all this is my first real girlfriend as in relationship and we are still building up.\n\nI always had problems with dessemination of time as in doing my hobbies, going out with friends and work. Now when I have a girlfriend I don't know what I should do with my spare time after work.\n\nI have the feeling that I can't handle all the things happening and that I should spend most of the time with her and doing less with my hobbies and such.\n\nI am almost always gaming with a friend of mine and its part of my life and it became something that I think I need to do but with a 40 hour work week I don't have much time (For my doing). \n\nI'm more comfortable at home gaming because I have my rig there and I can voice chat with my friend and just relax. Now I don't really know how much time I should be spending home vs being with my gf and playing games but not really playing with my friend (We almost do everything together as in playing WoW and currently ARK)\n\nNow before it escalates and getting really stressed I am asking for some tips on how to spend my time, explaining this is really hard for me so I hope I have explained it well enough\n\nSorry for my bad english I'm from holland so english is not my native language.", "summary": "Not feeling good about the fact that I have to game with my friend AND have to do things with my GF in a little amount of spare time."}
{"id": "t3_2c4dhj", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Communicating a negative attitude at work, How can I change this?", "post": "I recently began working in my graduate role, the only problem is a lot of the time I have nothing to do and the work is somewhat mundane when I do. \n\nAs long as I'm happy, I'm pretty satisfied as I feel more valued but most of the time its the opposite. I don't want to gain a bad reputation on my team, as they frequently informally discuss bad past workers. I also interact with about 30 different people each day. \n\nSome days I come in with a very positive attitude (which just seems to happen irregularly) but sometimes, like today... I just feel like shit, am bored and unfortunately this seems to be easily picked up by my colleagues. Today was one of the many shit days I've had so far. Unfortunately for me my team are a really lively bunch and love to chat/make jokes. Sadly, I'm a pretty serious person..... and don't quite get along with people as easily as they do. \n\nAs I said, I just started in this role; I have only been in it 3 weeks. \nWorkers, do you have any advice? I want to seem more interested in my role and communicate more positive body language tomorrow :)", "summary": "I act like a sad sack at work; co-workers pick up bod language; how can I be more positive?"}
{"id": "t3_1wa3p2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26 M] with my girlfriend[25 F] of 4 years, need help fixing the past.", "post": "I have been dating the same girl for 4 years  We have lived together 3 of those years.  I have always been a flirty guy and I know it can cause problems.  From the start of our relationship I wasn't ready for anything long term, wanted to be single and play the field.  Throughout our relationship I have been a dumbass and flirted with girls, even sent some pics that I shouldn't have.  This has happen not just once but about three times.  However, in the last year I wanted to get my shit together because she is a pretty kick ass girl.\n\nI don't know why I sent naked pics and flirted like I did while in a relationship.  It just something I got a thrill from doing (and in the end, help me get off).  I would feel guilty about it afterwards though.  \n\nMy partner's father cheated on her mother and hurt her pretty good by it.  So I understand her trusting issues and I haven't done anything to help it with what I've done.  It is too the point where she monitors me closely everyday.  She does go through my facebook, phone, and email to see if I'm doing it again.  Once again, I understand why.\n\nMy biggest problem is because I have done these things in the past, I feel like I've doomed this relationship.  How can I ever feel like the perfect guy for her when I've screwed up so many times.  I can't pretend that I the knight in shinning armor.  Because of all this, I feel like this relationship is at a standstill and we are just together cause its comfortable.  I don't want that, I want to go back and treat her right and be the best I can, but I don't think the past will allow that.  What can I do?", "summary": "I screwed up in the past with flirting and naked pics, now I want to salvage the relationship and turn it around."}
{"id": "t3_2husnq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My(27f) boyfriend(M30) of 3 years is not sure he wants to stop doing drugs...", "post": "I've always been fine with him smoking pot, and the deal with cigarettes was that he stopped smoking when I got pregnant. \n\nI found out recently that hes been using coke at parties and with certain friends. He says its just recreational. That because I never noticed, it clearly isnt affecting him or us badly. \n\nI've always been upfront with what I am ok with and what I am not. I have watched loved ones change into horrible, miserable people because of addictions, and I never want to put myself through things that happened in the past. I also never want to be the person who gives ultimatums to change someone. \n\nWhen I finally told him that its really bothering me and I cant go through my past again, he said if it meant that much he wouldnt....Then a few mins later suggested that I think about how I feel and take into consideration that hes not addicted. He thinks its fun. \n\nMy logical side is telling me exactly what I expect to hear, but my heart tells me that I love him and I cant imagine not being with him. Not sure where to go from here. Help :(", "summary": "boyfriend uses coke occasionally, doesnt see the issue. Might not want to stop. I hate that he does it."}
{"id": "t3_vmt73", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend doesn't seem to take my trust issues seriously? Advice please.", "post": "Hey Reddit. This is my friend's throwaway, first time posting on reddit so let's see how this goes.\n\nI am a 20 year old girl, dating a 23 year old guy. We've been together for almost 9 months. I love him. He loves me. I have been cheated on in the past, have been lied to, don't have a very positive male figure in my life. My boyfriend knows all this. \n\nWe have had problems with him looking at other girls infront of me, but nothing that we have not dealt with. We spend a lot of time together, and I love being with him.\n\nLately, my insecurities have been getting the best of me. I am an attractive girl but I have allowed my boyfriend's wandering eyes to make me feel horrible about myself. I am constantly worried he will leave me for another girl.\n\nWe have been fighting to no end recently, about everything. I expressed my fears and worries and we got through it. However last night he made a joke about wanting to go see his doctor to get a check up on his private part (he was specific to include that detail.) His doctor is a fairly attractive young woman. I was very upset about this, I don't understand what is funny about telling your girlfriend you would like another girl touching you.\n\nI got really upset, and he apologized for his joke. This does not make me feel better. I love him a lot, and I know he loves me. But I really just don't know what to do.\n\nDo you guys have any advice on what to do? I feel even more insecure in his satisfaction now... I just want to feel loved, appreciated, wanted, and respected.", "summary": "Boyfriend (23m) doesn't seem to take my (20f) trust issues seriously. Makes jokes about other girls touching him. etc. Need advice!"}
{"id": "t3_398fc8", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "20/m wants to help his 21/f gf deal with her shitty roommates even though she doesn't want the help", "post": "Throwaway because my gf knows my reddit account. My girlfriend lives with shitty roommates. They antagonize her, they bitch about cleaning the living room of the apartment (I've been over numerous times, it's not dirty at all), are hypocritical as fuck about dishes (they bitch at her over text or leave pissy passive aggressive notes around their apartment, even though they often leave the sink filled to the brim with dishes too. Oh and the \"man\" is 25 and the girl is 21), they don't share the garage key for the unit, and generally just shitty people. \n\nI really want to confront and engage them, and tell them to fuck off, specifically the 25 year old and tell him not to be a fucking coward and talk to her face, and stuff because they make my girlfriend feel miserable, she cries when she sees these passive aggressive texts that they send her. She hates conflict though and will do ANYTHING to avoid it, so I can't do anything because she won't let me. She's also living with them for another four months.", "summary": "Shitty roommates make my girlfriend miserable, I want to tell them to fuck off, she won't let me because she wants to avoid conflict. What should I do reddit?"}
{"id": "t3_3d9amx", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "MyNetDiary Hates Eggs! Question for MFP (or other app) Users", "post": "Stats: F/50/5'7\" SW: 234 lb / CW: 207 lb / GW: 159 lb (for now)\n\nHello, loseit! I have enjoyed lurking here, it has been very helpful and informative, so I thought I would ask this question of MFP (or other calorie track app) users.\n\nI have been using MyNetDiary for logging, which I like very much on the whole \u2013 easy to use, good database, etc. The only thing I dislike is that it seems to hate eggs! Their suggested macros skew towards low-fat, high-ish carb, lean protein only intake, which is basically fine with me because it's how I pretty much prefer to eat anyway.\n\nHowever, I have adjusted my diet to bump up the protein a little more, at the expense of sacrificing some carb calories. Not low-carb by any means - just low*er* than they suggest- because by experimenting I have found this tweak increases my level of satiety substantially. Yay!\n\nMyNetDiary tolerates this well enough (i.e., no warning flags in my \"Analysis\")\u2026unless, Ed forbid, I include as little as a single large egg in my day. Then I get yellow flags about my sat fat and cholesterol intake. And if I want to see it really go apeshit, all I have to do is happen to also have red meat (rarely) and/or a few grams of *light* butter (occasionally) on the same day. Then it goes all DANGER WILL ROBINSON! Grrrr.\n\nI eat at most 1 large egg in a day, and I'm not going to drop eggs from my diet, I just find it irritating AF to see these warning flags, as if I am chunking gobs of lard into my food or something. X/\n\nDoes MFP / other apps \"behave\" the same way? TIA for your replies!", "summary": "MyNetDiary hates eggs and flips out warning me about high sat fat/cholesterol intake if I add a single egg to my day. Does your calorie tracking app do that, too?"}
{"id": "t3_4k1e9z", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22/F] with my Brother [20 M] , He shut himself in for more than one month, he mostly plays piano and doesn't talk??", "post": "My brother is acting weird recently, he has always been calm and such, he's very nice, but recently he just shut himself in...\n\nDuring the last month I have been always getting awaken by him playing piano at 3:00 - 4:00 am, he continues on playing till like 9:00 - 10:00 am then goes to the fridge, eats something quickly then goes back to his room either playing again or doing homework or turning off the lights while lying in his bed listening to music...\n\nHe doesn't talk unless you go and talk to him!? and it's impossible to make him angry now, I know he's very nice but before he used to get angry if someone teased him but now he's kind of numb... I tried making him the food he likes he thanked me but he never finish the dish and he even lost weight I wonder what's wrong with him he's acting numb and spaces out a lot...\n\nI asked him a lot what's wrong with him, but his answer is always ( nothing ), I thought he was in love and got his heart broken but he said no that's not true and there's nothing wrong with him ... last night I asked him again but this time he said he's annoyed by my insistence ...\n\nI don't know what to do I'm really worried ... do you think he's depressed or he's acting normal ? Am I worrying too much ?", "summary": "In summary my brother is acting weird recently he used to be calm, yes, but not like now, he's acting numb I'm worried, what do you think ?"}
{"id": "t3_my4nv", "subreddit": "self", "title": "How can I quickly get/borrow about $2,000 to remove a fallen tree in my yard while I try to sell it?", "post": "I need to clean up a pretty big [tree that fell in my yard] in a mobile home park back in August, which is going to cost quite a bit to remove. Homeowner's insurance offered a whole $150 to help me remove it (they paid for the belongings in the shed pictured), but that's my own fault for putting the lowest possible amount of insurance on the place just to satisfy the park's demands.\n\nI've been trying to sell the place cheap for the past month or so with the tree in the yard but to no avail, just to clean my hands of the mess that I can't afford to get rid of.\n\nI got a \"final notice\" in the mail today that the tree needs to be removed by December 12th or else I'm in violation of some community policy and they'll bill me to have them remove the tree and I'll no longer have a \"positive relationship with the management office\" (which obviously could hurt me on future rental applications).\n\nI need to find a way to make or borrow about $2,000 for the complete cleanup. I'd be able to pay that amount back when I sell the house, which should be soon (my house is priced at about 60% of its actual value because of the tree and the fact that I want to leave ASAP).\n\nI'm 22 with minimal credit. I don't know why I'm asking Reddit for advice, but I guess that's my form of panicking.", "summary": "There's a big-ass tree next to my mobile home that I can't afford to remove, and it has to be gone ASAP."}
{"id": "t3_479z66", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Our[25F,30M] friends and family[20s-60s M/F] demand money because we're \"rich\", what can we do to make them stop?", "post": "My husband and I both make a good amount of money. We're also responsible with money, when I graduated college we spent two years putting all of my salary and 1/3 of his into paying off our loans and now we're debt free for the most part.\n\nOur friends and family ask us for money a lot. They say that it's not fair that we have a live-in maid but they struggle to pay off debt.\n\nThat's not our fault. They were the ones that took out private student loans and partied or bought tons of junk.\n\nHow can we get our point across without burning bridges?", "summary": "We earn a good amount of money and were responsible with student loans/money. Now people think we're rich and demand we help them."}
{"id": "t3_4g48zu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22 M] struggling with how to support my long distance boyfriend [21 M] through his grandfather's death.", "post": "We've been together 3 years and have worked out most of the kinks of living 1,000 miles apart, but this is a new challenge. Yesterday he found out his grandfather was in the hospital, so he rushed to his bedside. As of today, his grandfather is unresponsive and is likely going to pass within a few hours. I am making a point to always be available over text, call, and Skype and I'm doing my best to make sure that he feels supported and loved, but it doesn't feel like I'm doing enough, and I'd do anything to give him my shoulder to lean on right now. It's not necessarily practical for me to fly out because both of us have final exams to take in the next two weeks, and I don't want to burden his family with having to host me. \n\nMy question is if anybody else has advice or ideas on how to best support an SO in a time like this in a way that can be done from a distance.", "summary": "Long distance boyfriend is losing his grandpa, looking for advice on how to show my love and support of him and his family."}
{"id": "t3_3p3qvh", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "How do I [M, 23] get over other girl [19] while still in relationship with gf [25]?", "post": "I'm a European student living in another European country's capital to attend university. My girlfriend is an American expat who has been living here for about 3 years. We've been dating for two years and have been living together for about 6 months.\n\nAbout three months ago, I met another girl, also a foreign student. I was instantly physically attracted to her, but didn't think much of it, things like this happen all the time. However, after getting to know her better over a period of two weeks I fell in love hard. I could tell she had similar feelings for me, but I kept her at a distance because I didn't want to betray my girlfriend's trust. I have considered leaving my girlfriend to pursue a relationship with the other girl but have decided against it. I love my girlfriend very much, she has inspired me to make a lot of positive changes in my life over the time we've been together and I am happy and proud to be with her. Also a relationship with her is far more likely to bring me happiness in the future. The other girl is the kind of girl I used to go for in the past and a relationship with her would most likely only end in heartbreak.\n\nOn a night out with some of my friends I ran into the ''other girl'' and a group of her friends. Long story short, I came very close to spending the night with her but instead ended up destroying any chance of us being together, like I had decided before. I'm still not entirely sure whether I did it because I wanted to or because I felt like I had to.\n\nAbout a full month has passed since then, but I can't get the other girl out of my mind. I think about her constantly, even when I'm with my girlfriend. I feel guilty about it and I feel it's still effecting my relationship. I don't want to be with her (the other girl) anymore, whenever I do speak to her or hear about her, it confirms I've made the right decision to end whatever we had. I've made my decision and want to move on with my life but for some reason I can't.", "summary": "fell in love with a girl while in a relationship with someone else, decided to stay with girlfriend and end things with other girl but now can't get her out of my mind."}
{"id": "t3_2zz7pc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25 M/F] with my exboyfriend [027 M] a few months, hurt that he has moved on", "post": "Around September, I met a guy and soon after were in a relationship. It lasted about a month, and then he broke up with me.\n\nWe didn't talk much for about 2 months, and then he started texting me again. He said that he missed me and wanted to try to work things out. We kept texting for a bit, but then he stopped talking to me again.\n\nA few weeks after that, he texted me again saying he really missed me and wanted to talk again. I tried texting him a few times, and again he stopped responding.\n\nIt has been a few weeks since then, and now I found out that he has a new girlfriend. I am hurt because i still really care about him, and he kept telling me that he wanted to try to work things out and try again, but then never followed though.\n\nI am beginning to think that he was just messing with my head, and that he only texted me saying he missed me just because he didn't want to be alone.\n\nI need help to move on, but I just can't seem to do that.", "summary": "Was with my xbf for a month, he broke up with me a few months ago, he is with a new gf for a couple days, and I am hurt because I still love him."}
{"id": "t3_29p8ti", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20F] with my boyfriend [22 M] of only a few weeks, feel like I maybe rushed it?", "post": "About a year ago I got out of a terrible relationship with a guy I had been seeing for about three and a half years. He treated me like shit, and every interaction we had was another indication he didn't give a shit about me.\n\nAfter that, I felt very awful. I distrusted pretty much all men. Expected them to do nothing more than to leave me and disappoint me. Then I met my current boyfriend. He treats me so well, it's amazing, he bought me flowers for no reason. I almost cried when he did that because it was something I thought I never deserved.\n\nThough we are still in the incredibly early stages of a relationship, I am starting to feel this weird doubt. Sometimes I feel like I don't really know him at all, his hobbies, his hopes, his likes and dislikes, almost like he has no personality. Maybe it's just because we're still kind of in the getting to know each other phase, but I don't want to lose someone this nice. I like him a lot as well, I just feel sometimes I don't know him. I'm also trying to keep my distance with some of my more private and meaningful thoughts, as they have scared people away in the past. I haven't really told him my history, as it scares a lot of people off too. I feel like we're really formal with each other when all I want to be is comfortable. He is the nicest guy I've ever dated and I want this to work.", "summary": "This guy treats me better than anyone I've ever been with, but I feel like I don't know him at all."}
{"id": "t3_1glbok", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [28f] need advice to give to my friend [28f] about her bf[29m] of 4 years.", "post": "My lifelong friend, K, has been in a four year relationship with D. They have a really good relationship except for that he won't talk about commitment. She says the times she brought it up (not very often, maybe 3-5 times in their entire relationship) she felt she communicated that she wasn't expecting a proposal, just wanting to know the status of the relationship.  \n\nThey've lived together for about 2 1/2 years in a home that he officially owns. They act like a married couple in every other sense (no kids or shared bank accounts, though) and I feel that he loves her and is \"all in\" their relationship.  She wants kids and he says he does, too, but they're not making plans to have them together. \n\nRecently, her mother got engaged to her bf (both late 50's) after losing K's father to cancer in 2007. It's hard for her because she wants the security of marriage and helping her mom with wedding stuff is drudging up emotions she ignores before in he name of not being \"one of those girlfriends.\" \n\nI've secretly felt that he wants the benefits of a marriage without any of the responsibility, but I want to make sure that I'm giving her the best advice. Personally, I think she should end it. Yes, he's wonderful in most ways, but he refuses to talk about the future and is making her feel like a placeholder. To me, not talking about it is the problem. It will be hard, but I think she needs to end it before he (IMHO) uses her any longer. Am I missing something to consider?  \n\nJust to let everyone know, D's parents are still together and seem to have a good marriage. As for as she knows, they never had any \"big\" issues; yeah, no marriage is perfect but as far as she knows (and she knows the family pretty well at this point), they always had a good marriage.", "summary": "my friend's boyfriend refuses to even talk about settling down after 4 years together, 2 1/2 living together. What advice should I give her? He's a great boyfriend otherwise, but I feel he's stringing her along."}
{"id": "t3_1hw0al", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by assuming I was home alone.", "post": "Its a summer day and being a 16 year old female enjoying the days of being home alone, I decide to put my favorite broadway soundtrack *Chicago* on. I hop in the shower to enjoy the jazzy tunes (because, who doesn't like to sing in the shower) and I don't bother to close the bathroom door because I'm home alone right? Getting out to dry off when my favorite, \"When your good to Mama\" is on. \nFor those of you who don't know *Chicago* very well, \"When you're good to Mama\" is very sudctive if sang/danced right. So I feel hot when I sing this song and began to dry off in a senutal mannor, I put my leg up on the closed toilet seat and having a little sexy time in the mirror to see what I look like if I ever get a boyfriend and I do my little number when I turn my head to see-...\nMy Uncle, starting down the hallway. Gets a glance of my sexy-nakedness through the wide open door and my towel only covering one boob. He dives down the stairs and I grab my towel, turn off the music and shamefully dry myself off like a normal person, got dressed, and came out to the computer where I write my story of shame.", "summary": "Did a sexy towel dance in the mirror after my shower with the door wide open to the *Chicago* song \"When you're good to Mama\" thinking I was home alone, BUT, my uncle saw it all."}
{"id": "t3_2pgknf", "subreddit": "askwomenadvice", "title": "I (27/m) had an amazing connection with a woman (25) online, but lost interest after meeting in person. How do I proceed?", "post": "I (27-year-old guy) started talking to a woman (25) online over the summer and she seemed to be perfect for me. We would talk on the phone for hours and had an amazing connection, had almost everything in common, and she seemed like exactly who I was looking for for my next relationship. After waiting about 4 months, I finally met her in person over the weekend.\n\nWell I've hung out with her a few times and she's really fucking cool. But now I'm already missing being single. I know we're not bf/gf but I don't know if I'm into it romantically like I thought I would be. Also, she's cute but she looked a lot better in the pictures. I feel like a fucking dick even thinking that but I have to be honest here. Now I have no idea what the fuck to do. I told her before we met I was ready for another relationship but now that I've been hanging out with her I don't think I want that anymore. The connection isn't there in person like it was virtually. I feel bad like I've led her on, but I was really feeling it before I met her. I can tell she's super into me, but my feelings toward her aren't nearly as strong anymore.\n\nWhen we were talking online I told her I wasn't into one night stands anymore and that I was ready to settle down and have a stable relationship, and she wanted the same. Now that we've met I'm just not feeling it anymore.\n\nI've already met her family the day I met her (they were at my work Christmas party) and she asked if she was going to meet mine while they are visiting me for the holidays. I'm just not ready for all this. I thought I would be based on the connection I felt online, but in person it just wasn't the same. Maybe this sounds petty, I don't know. \n\nSo, how do I explain all this to her without looking like an asshole? I don't want to hurt her feelings. I'm not the womanizing type and I don't want to have sex with her without explaining all this to her first.", "summary": "I've had an amazing connection with a woman online for months. Finally met her in person and the connection isn't really there for me anymore. How do I handle this delicately?"}
{"id": "t3_29jv5o", "subreddit": "travel", "title": "I know that I want to travel, but the whole idea bewilders and overwhelms me.", "post": "Disclaimer: sorry if this falls into the mediocre and vague category of questions, but I don't know how else to put it.\n\nI'm a recent graduate, came out of uni in the UK last year. Haven't found anything I really want to do with my life yet in terms of a career, so have been muddling along in a call centre for the time being. With respect to this question, it probably doesn't help that my university (Oxford) is really the kind of place that holds your hand - at least in terms of providing accommodation, food etc. \n\nI'm sure that I want to travel and see the world, especially now that I'm in a time of transition, but I cannot even begin to imagine where to start. Every time my mind returns to the subject, and starts to think about the impossible complexity of the world outside my small country, I am hit with almost a sense of dread. Part of that dread is, I suspect, the worry that I will never pluck up the courage/resolve/whatever to actually do it. \n\nDon't misunderstand me, I have been abroad - many times. However, it has been exclusively in Europe, and only on what would be called holidays rather than 'travel'. \nWhen I hear or read about people going away for long periods of time, like a year or more, I wonder how can they do it? Does it cost enormous sums of money (which I lack)? Do they work while away? If so how on Earth does one organise such a thing? Down to even the basics, how do they choose where to go, how to move between places, everything. \n\nPart of this post is really just me tossing my frustrations out into the void. However, if anyone has any words of encouragement for a young man huddled in the corner of a room made of windows but no doors, they would be appreciated.", "summary": "How do you brave and wonderful people look at the world in all it's magisterial complexity and get out of bed and explore it?"}
{"id": "t3_1d2l06", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [M22] gf [F24] found pictures of my ex in my phone. What do I do now?", "post": "We've been together 6 months now. I'm her first bf, she's my second gf.\n\nI bought my phone around a year ago and right after it, I took it on a trip with my ex and snapped a few pictures with the two of us around famous landmarks and scenery and such. I then completely forgot these pictures existed in my phone until this week.\n\nEarlier in the week, I was showing my current gf some pictures on my phone and I guess she wanted to look through the rest of the pictures so I let her play with my phone while I went to do something else. After that, she handed my phone back as if nothing happened.\n\nThen, yesterday, we had a pretty big fight out of no where were she brought this up. About how I had these pictures of my ex in my phone. However, not only are the pictures from around a year ago, I took maybe 50-100 pictures since then so I rarely use my phone for pictures and i rarely scroll through my past photos. As a result, I had absolutely no idea that these pictures even existed.\n\nI tried explaining this to her and I said I was sorry for forgetting to get rid of them and that if she had asked, I would have deleted them right there. But she didn't say anything about it until the fight and I can't seem to get her to understand that I simply forgot about them. It's not like I was secretly looking at them and reminiscing. I just simply forgot.\n\nOf course, I have deleted the pictures now. But no matter how many times I try explaining to her that I just forgot, she doesn't seem to accept my explanations. So what should I do/say?", "summary": "my current gf found pictures of my ex and i from a vacation a year ago on my phone and she's extremely upset. What do i do?"}
{"id": "t3_sn6mw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the most random thing you've found in your floor/carpet?", "post": "For me, it would be when I would walk into my room, about three or four steps in, and something would catch my foot and cut it pretty good.  I would look at the spot where I got cut, but I couldn't see anything.  This has been an on-going problem for about six or so months. Almost everyday, I would get some kind of scratch or cut on the bottom of my feet. \n\nToday, I got cut again, so I decided to take another look at what it could possibly fucking be.  I found it! It looked like a staple of some sort, I assumed from laying the carpet down when my house was built.  No.  It was not a staple.  It was a fucking needle. A two inch needle. In my carpet.", "summary": "Something was scratching and cutting the bottom of my foot in my room for months, turned out to be a fucking needle in my carpet."}
{"id": "t3_4hn4xy", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [23 M] with girl [20's F] I am dating + other women. Unsure of dating etiquette.", "post": "Hi all,\n\nI am after some advice with regards to dating etiquette/ethics. I am currently casually dating multiple women (3), however one in particular I am developing strong feelings for. I have been with her the shortest amount of time (3 dates) and saw and had sex with another one of the girls in between our 1st and 2nd date. I knew pretty much straight away after our 2nd date that I really liked her.\n\nI have never had a girlfriend before or fully understand the process of becoming \"bf/gf\" officially. We have had (protected) sex but have not explicitly discussed exclusivity with each other yet. I am unsure how to broach the topic or whether I even need to just yet. I am ready to become exclusive with her, I'm just not sure if I am jumping the gun or if my previous behaviour is considered \"shady\". Should I tell her I was seeing other girls?\n\nMy question to r/ relationships is whether or not I need to bring up the topic of exclusivity and/or is it okay to continue dating other girls until she brings it up. How long is considered \"normal\" dating before one can be categorised being in an exclusive relationship?\n\nThanks for the help.", "summary": "Casually dating multiple girls. Have developed feelings for one in particular. Unsure if behaviour is shady and/or whether or not to bring up exclusivity with her yet."}
{"id": "t3_4xbll2", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Guy blackmailed my sister for sex. Sent naked pictures of her to whole family.", "post": "Hi Reddit. Need some advice. SO's question is typed up below:\n\nSo today I received a Facebook message from some guy I never met with a bunch of naked pictures of some girl. Then get a message from my sister profusely apologizing. Turns out the pictures he sent me are of her. Now, she is 18, and sent them to him to him a while ago. After discussing it with her, he apparently was blackmailing her into sexual acts or else he would send the pictures to my family. Luckily she stood up to him but now he's going through with his threat. What action can we take against this guy? He is ~27, my sister is 18, all pictures are of her at age 18, so she tells me. We are not in a situation to get a lawyer involved due to her living in an unhealthy environment still - whatever actions can be taken need to be able to be taken by her alone.\n\nIf it helps his Facebook is littered with him openly with drugs/money from selling/etc. The guy is not a good guy at all. It appears as though he is not in school either. We are located in central CT.", "summary": "Guy blackmailed my sister for sex. Sent naked pictures of her to family without consent. Need advice on what actions we can take."}
{"id": "t3_4cu36j", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "She[20/F] begs to sleepover at my[22/M] place twice...no sex... am I friendzoned for sure?", "post": "I started hanging out with this girl a lot a few weeks ago, but since I'm a senior in college I didn't really want to get into a relationship with her so close to the end since she's a junior. She acts really girlfriendly around me and when were out at a party she wants to spend the whole time with me, but then she has some excuse that leads us to split up before I can take her home. Eventually one night she texts me demanding she sleep over at my place. Score right? Wrong. We spooned most of the night, not even a makeout, but she wore pjs and a bra and claimed to be super tired, I forget from what.\n\nNext week we go our separate ways on spring break, but we get even closer via texting and at this point it felt like we were basically dating. Last night she texts me again demanding to sleep over at my place, this time I go for a kiss and she says \"I want to hook up, but I'm way to drunk, can we just sleep?\" Same pj and bra shit again. I'm getting tired of being the boyfriend in this relationship without any of the reward. Am I clearly in the friend zoned and should break it off? Why would a girl want to sleep at my place and not want to fool around? How should I confront her about this?", "summary": "Girls demands to sleepover at my place twice, but does it clothed and we don't do anything but spoon. Why would a girl do this when she knows I want more?"}
{"id": "t3_2cki5e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My friend [22F] has totally changed and is acting very bizarre. [22F]", "post": "I have been friends with this girl for about 5 years. Best friends all of high school. We went to different colleges so we did not remain as close, but would still spend time together over christmas and summer break, text each other, etc.\n\nOne day, she deleted me off Facebook randomly. After we had hung out about 2 weeks prior and everything had been totally fine. When I asked, she said I wasn't a good friend, that she didn't want to be friends, and that \"I know what I did\". I continued to contact her over the next few months or so, hoping she would cool down. I tried everything. I was so upset. It escalated into her personally insulting me and even threatening me. After countless attempts over the course of 6 months or so I finally gave up.\n\nShe totally changed personalities. She was always a girly-girl that was into fashion. She shaved off her hair, got very dark and negative tattoos, dropped out of school, etc. I was very worried about her. Her sister told me her parents were also going through a divorce that was affecting her. I wanted to be there for her but she would not talk to me, no matter what I said. What could I do?\n\nThis was all about a year ago. She recently contacted me saying things like, its been too long! Lets hang out soon! I am very confused. I know she went through a tough time, but the things she said to me were very, very personal and insulting. The last time we had spoken she threatened to kick my ass for no reason. She was my best friend and completely cut me out of her life and I'm still very hurt by it. Should I give her another chance? What do I say to her?", "summary": "My best friend cut me out of her life about a year ago, in a very aggressive and hurtful manner. Now she is contacting me again."}
{"id": "t3_4k49sv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [27 M] am currently at final stage interview with one of the leading tech/social companies however if successful it would mean relocating away from my girlfriend [25 F] of 18 months", "post": "Hey All,\n\nSo I've been having a hard time at work lately and have been eager to try something new. My girlfriend has been in a similar situation and until recently was also seeking new opportunities.\n\nWe're both based in London but were considering job opportunities in Dublin. Unfortunately her circumstances recently changed and she now needs to stay in London as she needs to help her family which is totally understandable and she also got a promotion at work.\n\nI've been applying for new jobs in London for months but have been getting hardly any responses. Last week I decided to send off 2 final applications for roles in Dublin and have successfully made it to a final stage interview with one of the leading tech/social companies - an opportunity that I don't believe comes around all that often.\n\nMy girlfriend is absolutely amazing and she knows how ambitious I am and has said that she'd definitely want to give it a try if I was to go there but I'm worried that I may be being selfish or this could end up with me loosing her?\n\nThankfully Dublin isn't too far and I'd plan to come back every few weekends and also fly her out every now and again too but I'm still slightly worried.\n\nIf this was for any other company then it wouldn't even cross my mind but this opportunity could open up so many doors in the future as well as travel/relocation opportunities that I'm not sure if I should pass it up.\n\nAny help or advice here would be greatly appreciated, especially from those that have been in a similar situation.", "summary": "I'm currently at final stage interview with one of the leading tech/social companies however if successful it would mean relocating away from my girlfriend of 18 months - what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_200o00", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Suffered an unexpected set back today", "post": "Hey r/loseit!\n\nSo I recently (re)started counting calories with MFP two weeks ago. I've lost 20 pounds just by counting calories with MFP in he past, but after some skepticism from my boyfriend, I decided to add working out to my weight loss plan.\n\nI signed up for Daily Burn (I stream I through Xbox on my boyfriend's and my tv) one week ago, and so far, I love it! I'm doing a cardio sculpting program that focuses on toning and weight loss. The workouts are daily for about 30-45 minutes, which has been perfect for a beginner like me who was always really turned off by the thought of spending hours at the gym.\n\nAs someone who has never consistently worked out before, I don't own any weights or other basic workout equipment. I decided to splurge and bought some light weights, a medicine ball, and a yoga mat, but for the meantime I've been using household objects as substitutes when the workouts call for them.\n\nToday I was doing one of the workouts that uses weights and I was using two cans of crushed tomatoes as substitutes. I was about halfway through the workout doing a lunge/bicep curl when one of the cans slipped out of my sweaty hand and flew right into our tv and cracked the screen :(\n\nI kind of broke down for a little while crying; I felt stupid for not turning away from the tv during that exercise, I knew my boyfriend would be mad, etc. I was just going to give up for today, but after cooling down for a while, I decided I wasn't going to let this set me back and I finished the workout on our bedroom tv and I'll buy a new one for the living room after I get my taxes back.\n\nSorry for the wall of text, just wanted to let you guys know you are all an inspiration to me and maybe sharing my frustrations will help someone else who is frustrated by a stupid setback to move past it!", "summary": "Broke my tv with a \"weight\" during a workout and got super frustrated, almost gave up, but decided to keep going!"}
{"id": "t3_4bhshc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My sister (25) thinks I'm (29) super judgmental and a bad person", "post": "Over the past year, my younger sister (25) has decided to distance herself from me (29) because she says I am \"too judgemental\" and gossipy.\n\nSome examples that ticked her off:\n\nHer best friend, who is ethnic with a beautiful face and a quirky nose decided to get a nose job. She was always a beautiful girl and her nose was perfectly nice and was not by any means hideous looking or disfiguring. She however, goes and gets a nose job and it wasn't a very well done job at all. The new nose doesn't flatter her face and she objectively looks worse than she did before. I think the entire procedure was unnecessary and have always found this girl to be superficial and shallow with her extreme standards of beauty. I told my sister, in casual conversation when she showed me pics of her friend's new nose, that I did not like it. And the nose looked super odd and the nose job was so unnecessary since she was already a beautiful girl to begin with.    \n\nAnother example is when I told her about a friend of mine whom I have always been concerned about. This woman is inloved in a long distance marriage with a foreign man who only spends maybe 3 months out of the year with her. I am supportive of her decision to be with him since she loves him but privately, I am deeply concerned and don't think he's a very good guy. When I tell my sister this, she gets annoyed and says its none of my business and she and I have different standards for relationships so if this arrangement makes my friend happy, I have no right to judge.\n\nDo holding these opinions mean I am a bad person? Am I being judgy? What is wrong with it?", "summary": "sister (25) thinks i'm judgy because I (29) disliked her friends nose job and don't think my friend's BF is good for her."}
{"id": "t3_2n08s9", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Roommate probably had sex with his girlfriend on my bed last night.", "post": "So my roommate had his girlfriend over last night and he asked me if it would be okay for me to spend the night with my parents (20 minutes away from campus) so I said sure you guys have a good night. I made my bed and tidied my room as I always do. When I returned today, my bed wasn't made and it smelled like a girl, so naturally I suspect they had sex on my bed, or at the very least, someone was on it. What's the nicest way I can ask him about that? I don't want to just accuse him, but I also don't want to just sit around and take it if something DID happen.", "summary": "I want to address the problem but I don't know how to phrase it in a respectful way that doesn't sound like an accusation "}
{"id": "t3_1jeatq", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[23/F] The best way to get over someone...", "post": "...is to get under someone new? \n\nHas this worked for any of you? \nFinally completely ended an almost 5 yr relationship about a month ago, and I will admit it wasn't my call. We haven't talked in a while and its been very difficult for me. I feel lonely. He's already moved on so I'm trying my best not to contact him despite our formerly close friendship and the total lack of closure. \n\nI have been kind of seeing a new guy and I've made sure to keep him at arms length and prevent anything too serious while I deal with the heartache... but a lot of my friends have suggested that kind of committing to someone else could distract me and help me move past the whole thing. Just want to know other opinions. I know my friends are just anxious to see me with someone new after the longest and worst break up.", "summary": "feeling heartbroken after ending a long relationship;  is it better to get involved with someone new as a distraction or just cope with the withdrawals alone?"}
{"id": "t3_4ifhge", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] and my [28M] of 8 months invited me spend Mother's Day with his mom but I feel weird about it", "post": "Hi guys \n\nSo my boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for 8-9 months. Today is Mother's Day and I live across the country so I can't spend Mother's Day with my mom. My boyfriend invited me to spend Mother's Day with his mom and dad, but I feel awkward bc that's like implying that she will become my mom too one day, but we have only been together for like 8ish months and I think it's too soon. We never talk about marriage or kids or anything like that so its not like she's really going to become my mother in law soon because we plan on getting married you know ? We haven't talked about this stuff because it's still a new relationship and still figuring things out. What do you guys think too soon to spend Mother's Day with boyfriends parents or am I overthinking this?", "summary": "my boyfriend and I have been together 8 months and he invited me to spend Mother's Day with his mom and dad, but I feel uncomfortable too soon?"}
{"id": "t3_1r4f1n", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "is my boyfriend[30/m] being rude to me[25/f], or am I just interpreting this wrong?", "post": "lived together for two weeks; dating for two months. \n\n* I made cookies from scratch. gave him one, he said: \"is it warm\"? and told me about this girl at his office who bakes amazing food. no thank you, no compliments.\n\n* we leave notes for each other on our bathroom mirror. I drew a flower and wrote underneath it: E+M=\u2665^2 he laughed at it and called me a \"dork\". \n\n* he commented on my makeup for the first time and called it \"different\". and talks about how he likes girls who don't wear makeup. \n\n* he has a tendency to speak over me if I try and express my feelings on the above mentioned things, he uses termination type phrases like: \"lets talk about it later\". \n\n---\n\nWe're both very busy right now. I'm an artist, he's an economist, we both work full-time and he's one semester from his MBA(4.0), it's finals week. Weekends are blissful because we spend quality time together. Weekdays are very busy and consist of us eating dinner, talking, *maybe* smoking a bowl before bed. \n\nI haven't been in a relationship in 2 years, him 5+ years.\n\nthis list is of things that happen briefly, most of our time together is actually really good, we laugh a lot. When stuff like this happens, it makes me kind of sad and I feel sort of deflated. I need to communicate this but I'm not sure how?", "summary": "boyfriend and I adjusting to new living arrangements, not sure if I'm taking somethings the wrong way. how can I communicate my misunderstandings to him?"}
{"id": "t3_3e3c5o", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being sarcastic to my teacher", "post": "Well today in my class I needed to go to the toiler really badly. So normally I raised my hand and asked my teacher may I go to the bathroom. She asked me why. I told her I'm going to slay the magic dragon n smoke some weed with him.. so what happened after that? She sent me to the principal for \"insulting the teacher\" and I got detention... I didn't even bother complaining, beucase I didn't get long one, because the insult basically wasn't the insult.. 1 hour after the school.. \n\nWell it was worth it.. I went to the bathroom while going to the principal. (our teachers have phones connected in every class and room, so basically when someone goes to the principal, teacher calls them and tells them she sent the kid there and you go there. If you don't you'll just get bigger punishment..", "summary": "Asked my teacher to go to the toilet, she asked me why, I responded sarcastically and got 1 hour detention for that, but I still went to the toilet!"}
{"id": "t3_52axal", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Boyfriend is leaving next year for college.", "post": "My (17F) boyfriend (17M) is leaving for college next year, however, I'm currently only a junior. We are in a very serious committed relationship, especially for a high school relationship. We've talked about the future, as in when he leaves for college and what will happen as a result... We've come to the conclusion that we'll need to break up as he wants to go out of state for his college education. As a result, we've had a copious amount of problems in our relationship.  For example, I harbor feelings of insignificance regarding the relationship because it's so temporary and essentially has an expiration date, which causes me to feel the need to push him away so I'm not attached to him and reliant on him and won't be depressed when he leaves for college. I know it's unhealthy, but neither one of us can end the relationship, we're too attached. At this point, I don't know what to do. Either option is selfish, leave the relationship to protect myself and as a result hurt him, or stay in the relationship when I know I won't ever be completely happy, and end up pushing him away because of this. What do I do? End the relationship and hurt him and myself as well, or stay in the relationship knowing full well I won't be able to be genuinely happy?", "summary": "Boyfriend is leaving for college next year, I'm only a junior. Questioning the significance of the relationship and if all the stress is worth it."}
{"id": "t3_3hjobt", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by having a couple of seizures and ending up in the hospital.", "post": "So today I fucked up and I'm now sitting in the ER being pumped full of fluids and fealing generally shitty. For all you armchair doctors out there I'll give you some background. Around the beginning of July I decided to get serious about taking care of myself I'm a 30 year old relatively In Shape guy. I'm 6'0 I have wide shoulders and can fit a 32 waist but wear a 34 for comfort weigh in at 195 to 197. Anyway I jog about 3 miles a day doing 10 minute miles, usually follow that up with some sit ups and have been running about 1000 kcal deficit a day, didn't get to that today instead I stopped at my parents to pick up my dogs was talking with my neighbors when I felt incredibley light headed and my heart started racing then according to them I seized up. When I awoke the two neighbors were completly freaked out and I knew shit had gone down cause I peed myself. Anyway so everybodies kinda freaking out and I just couldn't bring my heart rate down. I ate a banana and drank some water went down again for just a second, I sat up again and leaned against my truck where I went down for a third time and was out for a few longer seconds. That was my last seizure and than my heart went berserk I was hitting about 120-130 and blood pressure was plummeting. This would come in waves that started with me shaking and loosing the feeling in my fingers tips. Neighbors got me into their house and called another neighbor who is an ER doctor. She came by agreed that I was not doing well and that I should probably go for a ride to the local ER. That brings me to now, I've taken a saleen bag, a potassium bag, and magnesium.", "summary": "Standing around after work, collapsed and had three seizures. That were accompanied by crazy heart and super Shaky limbs syndrome. Getting my fluids replaced and vitals monitored for the night."}
{"id": "t3_1sogwg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I(F23) can't seem to let people get to know me. Beginning to be a problem for a budding relationship with (M27)", "post": "This is a bit difficult to explain. I have no problem with anyone getting to know me as a.. concept. I'm completely open about my opinions and general personality traits - but I have a problem sharing anything else. I've never been in a relationship, never really had a loving relationship with my family and have kept all my hobbies, thoughts and feelings to myself since I went through a bout of depression between the ages of 8 and 17. \n\nSo basically, I don't really feel like I'm a person to others. My passions, interests, hobbies, everything I do is mine, and I keep it to myself. \n\nNow there's this guy, and I have a feeling it might turn into something. We've been seeing each other for 2 months, and I think he likes most of what he knows about me - but he doesn't really know me. I know him extremely well though, and I like him a lot. Which makes it even harder to let him in - because the more he knows about me, the more is there he might dislike about me. \n\nHow do I get over this stupid hangup? I'm totally lost here. And I don't really have anyone to turn to, because no one actually knows me.", "summary": "Never let anyone get to know me as a person, because I've kept everything that makes me a person to myself. Don't want to do that anymore. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1en3ss", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "She [18,F] just isn't into me[18,M], even though I can't stop thinking about her. How can I stay close to her AND her new boyfriend, without feeling bad?", "post": "Classic situation, friends for a LONG time (for 13 years, we are both 18). Boy goes to senior prom with girl, asks girl out, rejected, dejected, good night. Only the next day do I realize how seriously bad I feel.\n\nShe has 2 proms. Mine which was yesterday and her other friend's (let's call him Pat). I sweet talk her, I mean seriously. I tell her how much she means to me, how I feel, and how I want the whole \"more than friends shebang.\" Cheesy, you betcha. She stepped back from us slow dancing as I said this and from her face I could just tell it was going to be a \"let him down easy\" moment. We are now just as good friends as before but I now know she is crazy about Pat.\n\nTHE TWIST: I'm part of a group of friends who is seeing her off next week for their prom. I shouldn't be so selfish. She is my friend and I value that so much and she is happy with this guy who is actually nice. I feel like such shit though. I know I should just move on; she just does not see me as anything more than a good friend. But I can't do it. I'm such a hopeless romantic, really. I do not want to \"give up\" on a relationship. I'm crazy about her guys. How can I hang around with her and Pat to stay close to her, but not feel like crap everytime I do? Any other advice is also greatly appreciated. Thank you.", "summary": "I got rejected by a longtime friend. I don't want to give up loving her though.  She just does not see me as anything more than a friend."}
{"id": "t3_16xatm", "subreddit": "self", "title": "Haven't told many people... Why not tell the Internet?", "post": "My ex husband was extremely jealous.. I've told bits of the story before on reddit I believe, but I've never posted it all.  \n\nI couldn't look up while in public, I had to watch the ground or my feet.  I wasn't allowed to wear make up or talk to any guys whatsoever. \n\nIf I broke any of his 'rules' then I would get beat... Plain and simple. \n\nI can deal with that... What I can't deal with is now that I'm away from him and divorced... I can't move on.\n\nI still can't look people in the eyes.  It's extremely hard for me to talk to men.  And I always feel so awful about the way I look, even though I get compliments from everyone.  I flinch every single time someone moves to quickly towards me, and it's embarrassing not having an explanation for them... \n\nI feel like my mind will always go back to the way it was trained while I was with him, and I don't know what to do.\n\nI feel, right now, that I could go my entire life not dating anyone else, and be fine with it. Because then I know I won't get hurt again...   (I know this feeling will go away eventually, so I've been told) \n\nHas anyone else ever been in this type of situation? If so.... What did you do to go back to your normal self.  I want to trust people again, I want my confidence back... I just want my life back.  \n\nSorry for the rant. I haven't slept tonight and I'm feeling sorry for myself. Thank you for taking the time to read, if you've gotten this far.", "summary": "ex husband beat on me. I don't feel like I will ever be able to restore my faith in humanity again."}
{"id": "t3_niqjz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what is your creepiest \"Haven't seen this person in years, but now they seem to be stalking me\" story?", "post": "When I was in 2nd year of college in Welland, Ontario (ugh) I lived with 6 girls. I'm a guy. One of them was my cousin, and the other her friend. The other 4 are not part of this story.\n\nAnyways - haven't spoken to/heard from/seen/had on Facebook this friend of my cousin's for 2.5years+ and today she is asking my cousin for my D.O.B., my middle name, and my home address (in Toronto, far from Welland).\n\nThis is significantly creepy to me as I have never had anything like this happen to me before. So Reddit, what are your creepy stalker stories involving people from your past?", "summary": "Ex-roommate (a female) asking my cousin for my personal information after we haven't been in touch for over 2.5 years."}
{"id": "t3_372ogy", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Buy a New Home, or Pay off the Old?", "post": "My wife and I have been saving and clearing debt for the last 2 years in order to start home shopping this September.  Currently we're unable to sell our existing condo as it's worth about $80k (we owe about $99k).  The difference is about the same as our new home deposit.\n\nAfter some number crunching - we realized since clearing all other debt - if we were very frugal, we could pay off the condo entirely in a little over 10 months. (Combine income of about $140k pre-tax)\n\nWhile we don't want to wait another year - having an additional 100k in buy power + possibly the ability to use the condo as a cheap equity line for new home needs sounds appealing. \n\nWaiting seems like a solid win.  Are there things I'm considering?\nCan I use equity in my old home as a source of down payment for the new one? (Would I want to?)", "summary": "= Are there disatvantages to paying off my current home and using its equity in various ways of purchasing a new home?"}
{"id": "t3_rq29m", "subreddit": "self", "title": "My first meaningful relationship ended in me getting used. Where do I go from here?", "post": "I'll sum this up best I can. To start, and what was probably a bad idea to begin with, I got involved with a girl online. Talked to her for a few months, ended up caring about her. She felt the same way so we became an item. Had a great time, perfect happy little couple and all. The only flaw was that there was a great distance. No ocean or anything; just lots of land. Cue to around the end. She confesses that she cheated on me by being drunk one night, letting a drunk guy friend come check on her (she's at a university), and he kissed her, she kissed back, they fingered/handjob until I guess she realized what was happening and stopped. After talking to a mutual friend for a few days, I took her back mainly because I love(d) her, I'm co-dependent, and I have no other options.\n\nCue to last week. It doesn't take us a week back together before she blows up (bad temper problems) and we have our worst fight yet. As much as I hated to, I ended it. It hurts me just as much as it may have hurt her by the way she acted. Today, I find out that the mutual friend from before had asked for a chance with her in case we broke up and she agreed (he actually is across an ocean). He's also told a friend of mine and even myself that he'd fuck her, how hot she is, all this stuff. It honestly disgusts me and makes my stomach cramp when I think about it. I'd like to get over it but I'm just a boring guy who stays at home all day except for class and I don't exactly have options to get my mind off things.", "summary": "ex had a backup plan with mutual friend who I thought was trustworthy who seems only to want to fuck her. How in the HELL do I manage to wipe my memories and forget this being used shit? Please help."}
{"id": "t3_4ixaos", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [22M] with my ex as of 12 hours ago, [22F] dated for 14 months mostly long distance. We broke up because it would be years before we were together again.", "post": "I met this girl just over a year ago at a university a few hours from mine and we began dating within a few months, initially we only saw each other on weekends and managed to have a few extended periods together, a month being our longest.\n\nShe then had to move back to where she was originally from, 30 hours away.\n\n80% of our relationship took place online and we were both very involved in it and always there come the end of the day. Just recently a plan for a 2 month visit was cancelled because we are both getting jobs that won't allow such a visit, and it crushed me.\n\nIt had been a rough road part of the time because the distance was hard on us and caused lots of frustration, but we still loved each other and still do. We both agreed that it would possibly be years before we stood a chance to be together, so I ended it. I know I broke her heart and it kills me because I broke my own too. \n\nI guess I'm just here to tell someone what I did and why, and see if anyone has ended a relationship for similar reasons. The distance was just too much for me, I'm just hoping I didn't make a huge mistake.", "summary": "I couldn't handle a long distance relationship even though I still loved her and I don't know if I did the right thing."}
{"id": "t3_2ki0tm", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [19 M] have compared my past exs to my best friend [19 F]", "post": "Yesterday I broke up with this girl [18] who I had asked out 3 months ago. At first i was head-over-heels about her, she was just about everything i look for in a GF, then it just died... She said she felt it too, I was becoming less romantic, less like how i usually am, as if she was boring me. She said she was going to break up with me if I didn't change because it felt as if though we were holding each other back.\n\nThis situation happened with my past three relationships, they start out big as i get to know them, then it just suddenly dies. Seeing as I have no idea what's going wrong I talk to me best friend (let's name her Rose). The whole time I kept catching myself saying \"just like you\" and then it hit me, these girl aren't you. I've been comparing girls to her and they fail to meet her standard.\n\nNow this is where it gets complicated, she's already rejected me, five years ago and that's around the time we became friends too, and believes that we're platonic...so did I. We tell each other everything, things that I would never be tell anyone else unless i married them, I don't trust people all that much.\n\nI don't know if I want to tell her again, this friendship between us means so much to me, and for her. But I also can't go on like this, ever other girl is inadequate compared to her. Plus I don't want to her reject me, she is the one person's opinion that I care for...", "summary": "Have compared every girl to my best friend, think I'm still in love with her, have no idea what to do..."}
{"id": "t3_g858a", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm finding myself becoming more and more misogynistic, based entirely on my interactions with women. Thing is, It's working well for me. Maybe I'm a cunt. You guys decide.", "post": "The only relationship with a woman I respect is the one I have with my mother. She's consistent in the way she treats me. It's a mutual love and respect, like any healthy person has with his/her mother.\n\nNow, to explain my post better. I realize the stupidity of title. I realize that misogyny is a higher form of generalization. I realize that it's not based on logic, but just experience. I can't stop it though. I can't stop the way I think. \n\nI'm by no means a social outcast or not in contact with women. I'm apparently attractive (sounds really douchey). Every time I've treated female partners, coworkers, friends with respect and politeness general niceness, I get walked all over. They're never, never, reciprocal relationships. As soon as I started treating girls like shit, with disrespect/generally not giving a fuck about them, the dynamics  changed. I don't wait for response I take complete control. \n\nMaybe I'm crazy, I don't know. Women of reddit, tell me in what situations you'd start treating a guy like shit/walking all over them or don't, I don't give fuck. \n\nThere's more to this but I can't be fucked typing more.", "summary": "I started treating women like shit and life got better. When ever I treated women with respect I was disrespected. The relationships were never reciprocal. "}
{"id": "t3_4ne6l7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [30 F] boyfriend [25 M], who lives in Scotland, is very bottled up emotionally and I worry about really stupid crap from afar", "post": "We've been close friends for five years, and have been in a long distance relationship for about five months now. He lives in Glasgow, Scotland, and I live on the east coast of the US. We voice chat most days, but often it seems like I dominate the conversations, and if I don't, there's a lot of silence. He's a very emotionally pent-up guy, and especially from a distance (we're aiming to meet in person next spring, as money constraints got in the way of it happening this summer), it's hard for me to gauge what he's feeling. He really hates discussing emotional stuff, so I try not to ask about it. \nBasically, I'm a giant blob of insecurity and sometimes I worry that he may not really be happy in this relationship and is just sparing my feelings or something. I don't know how to stop thinking like this. I know it's stupid and unhealthy. I just really adore him and I want him to be happy.", "summary": "Scottish boyfriend is emotionally unreadable a lot of the time. How do I stop fretting that he's not happy in this relationship?"}
{"id": "t3_49cvly", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [20M] with my girlfriend [20F] of 8 months, she wants us to live together next year, not sure if i want", "post": "We've been together for 8 months now, in a long distance relationship for 4-5 months, with ups and downs but we love each other. \nIn september I'll be moving from my current place for university and she wants me to go to the university of her city. \nI'd like to live with her, but a few things are tearing me apart : first of all, she lives in a small city (150.000 inhabitants) where the weather is shitty 24/7 and there is not a lot of things to do. This city also is 600km away from where our parents and friends lives. Finally I'm not really sure if I (we ?) can live together 7 days a week for a year at least.\nWhat I fear the most is being in this city that I don't really like for years for uni if things turns bad, but I feel like she would feel betrayed if I don't jump on the opportunity to close the distance.\nWhat do you guys think ?", "summary": "Gf wants me to close the distance in september to join her, I don't like the city where she lives but I feel like we will break-up if I don't."}
{"id": "t3_38u02u", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (22M) friends (21-25 M/F) constantly rely on me for rides.", "post": "I'm one of the very few people amongst my friends that has a car. With that comes the expectation that I drive everywhere. For the most part I'm totally fine with this. I love driving, and going places with people to other towns and such is great.\n\nWhere it's not so great is when I'm expected constantly to drive people somewhere, or when they need something they just say \"Oh he's got a car he'll do it.\" The worst offender for this is one of my friends refuses to get her licence, or a car and sees no need for it. Yet if she needs to be out of town for something or to go somewhere she'll just get me to do it in the guise of wanting to hang out. Another offender is a friend who planned a trip to another country around the idea that I would drive her to the airport, and when she was ready to come back (a month later) she expects that I'll pick her up. It's almost 2 hours one way to the major-cities airport, it's a big day.\n\nI don't mind helping people out. A ride here and there is fine, if your in a bind and need a lift i'm perfectly willing and happy to help. But when it becomes expected of me, it feels like i'm only around because I have a car. They have the money and resources to get a car, so there is no real reason they cant get one.", "summary": "many of my friends don't have vehicles, constantly plan their lives around me driving them, or expecting rides all the time. I feel guilty for saying no."}
{"id": "t3_2msx1t", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by burning the evidence.", "post": "So some background first. My family is a uber health conscious crazy about healthy food and I agree with that for the most part. But I can't just eat healthy food every day without a single bit of sugar. So I go to a fast food place once a month to get my fix. I usually eat it at home in the comfort of my computer playing games till my parents get home, but if they found out they would probably beat me for this. So I got a bright idea to burn the paper bag and wrapper that it comes in and carefully collect those ashes and throw it outside.\n\nI do this once a month and throw the ashes over some little flowers in my backyard. I do this steadily for a few months and nothing goes wrong. Well one day at school we have to take home this fish once a week or so to collect data on its habits. Well I take a fish home every week and then I always take it back to school the next day at 5 in the morning. Well my neighbors see me come home sometimes because they're this amazing old couple who just sits and watches the outdoors together and they probably see me come home with a fish every week or so.\n\nSo every week I take home a fish but since I leave so early they never see the fish leave my house. Then they see me in the afternoons after I come home go outside and spread some ashes over some flowers because in my mind I think ashes are good for plants so I do that, but this old couple thought I was cremating my dead fish and tossing their ashes once a month.\n\nBeing the amazingly nice people they are, after last weeks burning of evidence, they stop by and they're carrying a little fish tank with this beta fish in it and when I open the door they say they saw me spreading the ashes of my fish and hoped this fish would outlive the rest and then they said goodbye and left me there kinda shocked at what just happened. It was then that I realized that they thought my fish were tragically dying every month and that I kept replacing them in hopes of outliving the rest.", "summary": "I burned trash and threw it on flowers and my neighbors thought my fish kept dying and bought me this bad ass beta fish."}
{"id": "t3_3va6g6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (M20) and my girlfriend (F23) have been dating for a while but apparently her Father (M50) doesn't want us dating, what should we do?", "post": "Hey Reddit, since you guys were pretty helpful last time I asked for relationship advice I'm hoping that can be the case this time too. So I've been dating my current girlfriend since this past August and things have been great. I've actually known her for 3 years but when we tried dating when I was 17 and she was 20, her mom was having none of that so obviously things didn't last very long. So, 3 years later and we're trying again, this time with her mother's approval and her father's approval, or so we thought. Last night my girlfriend's dad gave her a long winded conversation of basically why he doesn't like me, how apparently he thinks I'm not going anywhere in life (to be fair I'm only a student in my 2nd year of Architecture technology, not sure where he got that idea from), he also said I don't talk to him enough when he's never really tried to make conversation with me and says I don't look him in the eye which I have, not sure where that's coming from either, point is he doesn't like me. She mostly thinks it has to due with him being raised by an abusive father, for he kept saying to her well I would never bring a girl to my house when I was your age, which my girlfriend said to me she wouldn't have either if she lived in that house. On a side, my girlfriend has cerebrallypalsy affecting the right side of her brain but its an extremely mild case. The only things she can't really do is drive and cut her own food and other two handed tasks that most people take for granted. So I guess because of this her parents are a little bit more protective. But last night my girlfriend's Father also compared her to her older brother and older sister, saying he never had to deal with any of this from them, (neither of them have any disabilities) so my girlfriend got pretty upset and doesn't know what to do. She wants to move out but her mom won't let  her. I say they shouldn't have it both ways but I'm worried they're going to make her dump me regardless.", "summary": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for a while but her dad wants to put a stop to it because he doesn't think I'm good enough for her, what should we do?"}
{"id": "t3_poiqx", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, I told my boss that I refused to work off the clock any longer and now he won't speak to me.  Did I go about it the wrong way?", "post": "I am an hourly employee at the corporate office of a large retailer.  My hours are 9am-6pm Monday to Friday.  I have been with the company for almost a year.  A few months after I started working, my boss would call or text me after work hours to ask me to do things.  This happened maybe once a month....  At first I would answer the call and if it was a minor task, I would go ahead and complete it no questions asked.  I felt as though this showed my willingness to go \"above and beyond\" and somehow score me a promotion sooner or what have you.\n\nLately, my work load has increased significantly and I feel as though I am being taken advantage of.  I have asked for a raise since I am no longer doing one persons job....to only be shot down.  That being said, my enthusiasm in the work place has lessened and the fact that I am so overwhelmed at work makes me not want to have ANYTHING to do with work once I clock out.  That being said, I have stopped answering calls from my boss after hours and he made a comment one day at work about how I never answer his calls anymore on my personal cell phone after work.  I would come up with reasons like I didn't hear the phone ring and it was too late to call back or whatever...\n\nThis past Friday he texted me at 9:30pm while I was out celebrating my sister's birthday and asked me to remote into my workstation to complete a minor task....I finally had enough and I texted back \"Since I am not salaried, I would prefer that you not contact me after hours or on weekends about work.  Thank you and have a great night.\"\n\nHe replied back, \"Sorry to bother you\".  And that was that.\n\nAll day today, he has refused to speak to me, answer any of my emails or return my phone calls....which is not like him at all.  WTF?  Was my response to him too bitchy or something??  Would you have gone about it another way?", "summary": "Pretty much told my boss to piss off when he texted me on a Friday night to perform a work related task when I was off the clock and now he is butt hurt.  Did I fuck up?"}
{"id": "t3_rri3p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Can someone help me find a video for my environmental geology class?", "post": "In my class, we're discussing greenhouse gases, and how humans are affecting the planet/climate.  I saw a video a few months ago (I think it was from BBC?) about the permafrost beginning to melt in Russia, releasing tons of methane.  I found the BBC video explaining that, but I saw a really awesome video about one scientist who has attempted to reverse the permafrost melt in one area and has succeeded.  He bought a lot of herd animals that trampled the snow into the ground, and cut down some of the vegetation, and it has helped keep the permafrost cool enough to prevent methane release in that area. Does anyone remember that video, and if so, can you help me find it? I'm not having much luck.", "summary": "looking for a video about a scientist that has reversed permafrost melt in a part of Russia by buying a lot of animals and removing vegetation."}
{"id": "t3_4byudt", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by taking a large swig of phlegm.", "post": "Hope this doesn't break the bodily discharge rule, but it says it's okay for the weekend and Friday's count where I'm from.\n\nThis is a rare kind of TIFU, it happened today at 2am, I've had man flu from hell, been running a fever with elevated heart rate for a few days, and good god the amount of shit I have coughed up has been ridiculous. \n\nI decided to keep a pint glass by my bed so I could just phlegm in there & save waking everyone else up. I went to bed around 7pm almost entirely unable to human.\n\nOrange juice is good for you when you're ill  (the pure kind with bits, not squash/cordial), so I shot off to bed armed with my OJ and phlegm glass. Now the mistake I made was having the exact same glass for both. You can see where this is going but sit back and enjoy the gross details.\n\nThings worked out alright for a while, I'd cough then have some oj, pretty solid tactic & one that I should've stuck to. The moment of doom came when I went for the oj without coughing, in a virtually pitch black room I reached for it and I was sure it was the right glass...\n\nSo sure that I went for the proper mouthful, yknow the kind where your mouth is drier than ghandi's flip flops, and you just wanna swish that moist goodness all around in there.\n\nPoor decision, I realised my mistake as I felt my goopy mucus with chunks collide with my tongue, tonsils and teeth. Vile. I got most of it back into the glass as swiftly as possible. \n\nBut your body lets you know when you fucked up and this was one of those times, I ran across the hall in my boxers and just about made to the toilet, sprogged and wretched to a standard that'd make Gollum envious. Super attractive, I know. I emptied my glass of shame and broke it by throwing it to the recycling bin about 5m(15ft) from my window.", "summary": "using a glass to phlegm into is a subpar idea, having orange juice in a seperate, identical glass was an even more foolish idea. Made myself sick by drinking my own phlegm and disposed of the evidence."}
{"id": "t3_1jtr17", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [24M] SO [24F] of 3 months is taking me on an emotional rollercoaster ride and I'm lost at what to do. [Dating]", "post": "Background: \n\nMet on okcupid, clicked like clockwork, all the big life/relationship issues (worldview, politics, money management, living situation, future dreams/wants, schooling, pets, hobbies) are all *perfectly* compatible. We get along fantastically, and have great sex. Like she has been brought to tears and laid comatose from intense orgasms on multiple occasions by myself (said it's only happened once before), and I have had the best sex of my life with her. She's wicked smart, pretty, and down to earth.\n\nProblem: I am way into her. I have strong feelings and can really see this heading somewhere. We have been seeing each other for about 3 months. We are exclusive but she is uncomfortable making things \"official\" or being \"boyfriend and girlfriend\". her enthusiasm for us is like a rollercoaster. One day she will tell me we should take things slow and that she is unsure about us, and the next day she will say something along the lines of \"don't let what I said dissuade you, I like you a lot!\". we see each other about 3 times a week, and talk every day.\n\n...........................\n\nIt's all terribly confusing and this makes me feel very strange. I have no clue what to think and it's fucking with my head. I've talked to her about it and she says that she is just not good at expressing her feelings. I told her explicitly I want a relationship. She says she does too but wants to wait, and then the flip-flopping begins where she can't articulate exactly what she is feeling/thinking.\n\nI don't want to be lead on further and get hurt, but at the same time I don't want to abandon this potentially awesome partner. wtf is going through her mind, what should I do/think about this? we have opened up to eachother quite a bit, am I really \"rushing\" into things after being together for 3 months and wanting some kind of commitment?", "summary": "girl alternates between passionate sex and strong interest, and vocal apprehension about us. no idea what to think, have talked plainly to her without gaining insight."}
{"id": "t3_1154ag", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm being \"bullied\" by 2 girls that are 2 years younger than me, also I'm male. I wanna trick them, and teach that I'm the wrong person for this. What should I do, any ideas?", "post": "I have never had to face with a problem like this, of course some skin-headish (or soon to be skinhead) people tried to beat me up, but I could always handle it smoothly because I didn't fear from them and they were males as well as me. \n\nHowever it's different in this situation. I can't fight or anything like that, because they are girls and they only provocate me by words, if they actually had the courage to do something physically I could at least always drive them off, but with words I can't do anything. They just fucking say some unpleasant words when I show up, or run into them on the corridors, actually it's pretty hard to avoid them since we are on the same level. I'm getting enough of it, and I don't want a straight up talk, because I know that it won't solve anything.\n\nI want to do something that will teach them to never-ever do something like this to anyone. Oh and btw they are ugly and I seriously don't get it why do they do that.", "summary": "Ugly stupid girls provoking me by words and I wanna teach them not to this, but with a funny and even disgusting thing. I just wanna shut them up."}
{"id": "t3_hpq3p", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "The lease on my family's condo is being terminated because my little brother was caught (allegedly) smoking weed on the premises of the complex. Is there anything we can say or do to forestall or prevent moving out?", "post": "Long story short, I have lived with my parents and little brother in a large, comfortable, rented townhouse for a little over a year.\n\nI moved in with my parents with the aim of getting my life together, and I subsequently somewhat have and I have found a great job. Meanwhile, my parents have hit a bit of a rough patch, so we've all been making ends meet together. We have always paid rent and bills here on time, and our initial one-year lease converted over to a month-to-month lease a couple of months ago.\n\nAlong comes my little shit head brother, who has never had a job, and who we're all trying to be supportive of, to ruin everything. Only a couple of days ago, we received a notice to quit in the mail that says we have to vacate the premises by the end of this month. Not long after that, we receive a follow-up letter detailing the reason: security discovered the shit head (allegedly) smoking weed in a vehicle with someone else, and management has a zero tolerance policy. There were no police involved.\n\nMy parents have attempted to discuss this with the office to no avail. Now we're kind of screwed--we've been kind of skating on the edge just to stay here, so to come up with moving expenses, find a decent new place at the worst time to search for the year (summer), and do all of that in a month looks impossible.\n\nFuck it. I should mention that I'm the only one in the condo with a job--I'm making decent money, but I have terrible credit. My dad has been collecting unemployment and going to interviews for months, and my mom has always stayed at home. Shit head is a shit head.", "summary": "Condo management has told my family to hit the bricks within a month, because little bro (allegedly) smoked weed. Is there any way out of this, or at least to buy a little more time?*"}
{"id": "t3_3anccr", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I (20F) have been dating my current boyfriend (21M) for more than a year, why do I still feel weird about my ex (22M), who I only dated for four months?", "post": "So I have been dating this amazing man for more than a year. I love him completely and I have never been happier in my entire life. It is also the longest relationship I have ever been in.\nI met my boyfriend at college which is out-of-state and during the summer we are in different states. I am in my home town where my ex lives.\nWhenever I'm driving around I find myself peering at all of the places he usually is, looking for a glimpse of his car or of him even.  I'm not entirely sure /why/ I do this.\n\nI had dated my ex for four months, the longest relationship I had ever had until my current one.  At the time I was certain he was the first person I ever fell in love with, but now that I've been in my current relationship I'm not even sure if I ever was /in love/ with him and not just infatuated.  He ended things with me and then proceeded to ignore me if he saw me in person for the next few days, blocked me on FB, etc.  I haven't really seen him since, I mean once I walked into the coffee shop he works at and saw him unexpectedly and turned right around and left without even getting farther than the doorway.\n\nI am just kind of confused. I don't know why I still feel weird and act weird about my ex when I am so in love and so happy with my much longer term boyfriend.\n\nDoes anyone else have experience with this? Any help for me to understand what I'm feeling more would be really appreciated, or really just anyone sharing similar experiences so I know I'm not alone! It'd be really appreciated.", "summary": "I dated a boy for four months and have been dating my current boyfriend for more than a year but sometimes still feel weird/attached to my ex."}
{"id": "t3_uf538", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU Got Caught... At Work!", "post": "Okay so I'm basically fucked. Let me get started on how badly I'm going to lose my job.\n\nSo today at work my boss was sick so he called in her daughter who is a year older than me to come in to help close. So she came in and we proceeded to get done clean up and the other workers left. I work in a grocery store by the way so nothing too special. Anyways I was getting my stuff from the back when she came back there and she started to get really touchy.\n\nSo this is where shit got hot and heavy and we proceeded to carry on, she blew me for a bit and then she asked if I had a condom. I had one in my car so I went out of the store, but I took the short way which was to open the loading door, at the time I thought nothing of it. So we finished up and she said she has been wanting to do that for a long time and next time we should make it even more kinkier and all over the store.\n\nSo this is where shit gets bad. I was driving home when I was thinking of how awesome it was, when the thought hit me. The alarm was set because we had locked up. So tomorrow my boss is going to get to work and see the alarm had gone off, and do what anyone would do. Watch the camera's. So I'm basically fucked.", "summary": "I fucked my bosses daughter in his store, but was dumb and opened the garage door making an alarm go off. So now he is going to watch the camera's and see us. "}
{"id": "t3_4aom9m", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me late [20's M] with my gf [early 20's F] almost 3 years, live together 2", "post": "Hi, using a throwaway, because it seems like the thing to do. \n\nThis is about me (late 20's male) and my gf (early 20's female), we've lived together for about 2 years now and are talking about marriage and children in the upcoming couple years.\n\nI love my gf with all my heart, she is the first girl I've been with that actually holds my attention. I was a serial cheater before her in a couple of longer relationships, but with her I don't have any interest in other girls, even if they come on to me a bit. \n\nHowever, we both have some insecurities, mine from previous relationships and hers from what I've said about those. I told her everything about my past, how I acted, what I felt bad about, etc. So naturally, there was some trust issues early on, but it seemed as though we moved on.\n\nRecently, a lot has been going on in our lives. Sick parents, parents visiting, and I got arrested and had to spend the night in jail. While it wasn't a huge deal, I'll be losing my license for a month. \n\nThere was an enormous amount of pressure on her and she felt alone for a while, about a week by her accounts. Last week, I did some snooping (yep, never good) and found a couple messages to an ex that really hurt, not only because it was explicit about sex but because he said something about me sexually not fulfilling her and I felt like she didn't stand up for me. \n\nAnyways, we talked about it and she cried and explained that the stress had made her feel lonely and I get that. I am just having a hard time moving on past this, even though I know it was just some messages. \n\nI feel like a baby not getting over this... Any advice?", "summary": "gf is stressed, reached out to ex for attention, didn't stand up for me and now I am having a hard time getting over it."}
{"id": "t3_2kejx9", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "tifu by stopping a fight on the subway", "post": "This was yesterday.  I got on the Metro rail in downtown LA headed towards north Hollywood. I found a seat in the back.  Soon after the train left the station a commotion began near the middle of the train car.  A little old man in a suit was standing and yelling (in what I think was Farsi) at a middle aged guy who looked like a pimp who was sitting down.  He was wearing a lot of gold &  sunglasses & a flashy shirt.  Imagine the old man from 'Up' yelling at Samuel L. Jackson.  The pitch of the conflict was starting to rise and I sprung into action.  I immediately stood and walked directly to where the confrontation was taking place (I'm a big guy).  As I walked through the train car, I noticed a kid had begun filming the men on his phone.  When I got there, I stood across the train car from the two men and just stared past them and did nothing.  They both saw me approach and expected me to do something. I did nothing, but my presence was known.  The old man was seething and muttering under his breath.  The pimp looking guy was smiling.   After a moment, I looked the old man in the eye, and then the pimp guy.  The argument stopped and we all stayed there in silence as people came on and off the train, until the last stop.  It was kind of awkward and I wished one of them would move.  At the last stop I moved across the train to make sure they got off before I did.  In my head I was a train Marshall.  The old man said one more thing to the guy as he exited and then they walked to opposite sides of the station.  Fight averted.  This is in TIFU because that would have been a great video and I stopped it from happening.", "summary": "TIFU by stopping a fight on the subway because the 'old man vs middle aged pimp' fight would have made a great video]"}
{"id": "t3_1gb5uu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend of 2 years [17/F] is spending time with a guy who likes her/she used to like (not sure if she still does). Am I [17/M] wrong in being angry/jealous?", "post": "Recently (this past month), my girlfriend has been hanging out a bit with a guy who tried to ask her out earlier this year.  They have been friends for as long as her and I have been dating, and I found out in late-2011 that she had a bit of a crush on him.  I expressed how that made me feel a bit uncomfortable in a calm way at that time and she understood.  They didn't talk quite as much and that made me feel a bit better.  \n\nFast forward to earlier this month, they are both in our school's choir program and went on a field trip to sing.  It went until later in the day, and the guy offered my girlfriend a ride home.  Since he had tried to ask her out earlier this year, that made me feel a bit uncomfortable, but I let it slide.  They went to the movies, and he paid for the both of them before she was home, which added to the jealousy a bit.  \n\nYesterday was the last day of our school year, and she told me that she was going to the guy's house to watch some old movie.  I told her I felt it was inappropriate, and we then went back and forth a bit before she called me stupid.  Childishly enough, I just shouted the insult back at her.  She stormed off, and we haven't spoken since.  I'm not sure what to do; we've been together a long time and I feel very strongly for her, but knowing her, this kind of event will happen many times throughout this summer.  I don't know if I can trust her, and I kind of want to break it off at this point.  I'd really like some outside opinions on this matter.  I understand this may sound a bit childish, but I could really use advice.", "summary": "GF is hanging out with guy who has a crush on her, she will be hanging out at his house a bunch this summer.  Am I wrong in being angry and jealous? Should I break it off?"}
{"id": "t3_2dj0js", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [18M] have been having trouble trusting my girlfriend [18F] of almost 6 months at night time.", "post": "My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 6 months now. During the day, I completely trust her because she's usually always with me. But once it gets to the night time, I always have this thought that she's going to sneak out to a party or some where without telling me.\n\nThe reason why I feel like I dont trust her at night is because I've caught her going out at night a few times during these past months without telling me. I would usually find out by seeing Instagram posts she was tagged in or her friends I follow post some pics with her in them.\n\nI've actually already told her that I want her to tell me when she goes out at night so I at least know. She's agreed to do so, but I caught her once again after telling her to tell me.\n\nWhat should I do? Should I speak to her about my trust issues that come alive at the night time or just trust her that she'll tell me?", "summary": "I get trust issues at night because my girlfriend has gone out in the past without telling me when I've told her to tell me. I find out when she goes out by Instagram and twitter posts. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_27wdjd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (22F) never told my GF(24F) that I love her (I do) and she broke up with me this morning", "post": "We were together for 3 months and had problems for a bulk of it (mostly of my causing, ex. I couldn't orgasm, I lived with my ex, I have emotional issues). I used to spend the night at her house 3/4 times a week, and talk constantly. That changed a couple of weeks ago, last night I straight asked her if she was done with me, and this morning she said that she\n\n \"thought it would be better for both of us if we didn't sleep together anymore, but she still wanted to talk/be friends, but it was fine if I couldn't.\" \n\n1. Should I tell her that I love her? I didn't because whenever I wanted to it would have been horrible timing, which now seems incredibly foolish. I think I would regret not telling her. \n\n2. Do you think she actually wants to still be friends?", "summary": "GF of 3m broke up with me, said she still wants to be friends. Does she actually? Should I tell her I love her since I never got the chance?"}
{"id": "t3_14dg2j", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Is it possible for my fiance to change the status of his B-1 visa to a green card if we get married? (x-posted)", "post": "My fiance and I have been together since last spring. He spent 3 months here using the visa waiver program, then after a month of being apart, I went to Australia for 10 months with a work and holiday visa. We came back here so I could spend some time with my family and get a job, because my work visa in Australia ran out and I obviously need income.\n\nHe applied for a B-1 visa while we were in Australia and got it (he does a lot of work that require attendance at certain events in the US) but we've since decided to stay here permanently. Is there a way to change the status of a B-1 visa to a green card? Someone online said an I-130 or something would be the application we would use, but I'm not sure and don't want to spend $1000+ on an application that wouldn't be applicable, and all of the legal jargon is confusing. I-130 is for relatives, is a husband a relative? Is a fiance? We're fine with getting married now, since we've been planning on it for a year or so anyway.\n\nThanks in advance for any help you provide!", "summary": "Want to change the status of my fiance's visa from a B-1 to a green card. Need help figuring out how to do so."}
{"id": "t3_2n756i", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24 M] with my girlfriend [28 F] 1 year 1 month, Indian couple who met at work and are very serious...", "post": "So, I am from India and having an older girlfriend is a bit of a taboo. When my parents found out they were upset...and that is an understatement. The relationship was only 7 months old, but we were serious even then. Things cooled down, and now my parents are okay. \n\nI met her mom by accident at her house when I was visiting. She talked about her concern for her daughter. How she wants her daughter to be married soon, and that I should do it within a year if I want to be with her. I had already told my gf that it wasn't going to happen before 2-3 years as I want to establish myself a little financially before I take the plunge. She seemed to understand. She's been okay with the idea. \n\nHowever she has been unsatisfied on the work front for a few months now. I too suffered from depression about 4 months ago and  am still recovering. She's going to quit her job after July next year and explore different jobs for a year. She has saved up enough to do that. I fully approve of her plan since I myself will be exploring different avenues next year. \n\nShe's gone through a strange turn of attitude towards the relationship of late though. She wants to get married next year or early 2016. She says that this is non-negotiable. I don't want to be married this soon. I feel I need to work a little more since I only graduated in 2013. I feel I haven't worked enough, not been on my own enough. \n\nShe had gone through a break up after a 4.5 year long relationship with her ex. 4 months before she was to get married, the guy who always knew she had diabetes told his parents and they immediately cancelled the wedding. She didn't take it well, and has become extremely insecure. That's the theme of our relationship too. She's been very insecure when I've constantly tried to reassure her that I'm serious. \n\nI don't want to get married next year but nor do I want to give up on this relationship. Please advice.", "summary": "Serious relationship of 1 year with 4 years older gf. Gf wants to get married next year, I don't. Help!"}
{"id": "t3_2yio5p", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19 M] was planning on moving in with my friend [20 F] of a couple years and her boyfriend, but another mutual friend [19M] has asked me to move in with him.", "post": "We're all in university, and looking for places to live for our third year.  Originally I was going to move in with my friend(who I'll further refer to as Jen) and her boyfriend, both because we're close and thought it would work, but also in part because everyone else seemed to already have roommates for next year, and I felt I was out of options.  \n\nJust today though a  mutual friend of ours (we'll call him Sam) asked me to move in with him and his current roommate, and now I'm not sure what to do. On one hand Jen and I are close friends, and I get along fine with her boyfriend as well.  on the other hand Sam asked me to move in with him, he already has a place in mind which is in a perfect location, and I was always a bit uncomfortable with the idea of being the '3rd wheel' so to speak.  Sam doesn't know I've been looking for places with Jen, he just knows I'm looking for a place for next year.\n\nI don't really want to ditch Jen, although I'm starting to lean that way, and more importantly if I do move in with Sam instead I don't know how to tell her.  any advice helps guys.", "summary": "was gonna live with a friend and her boyfriend, until another male friend asked me to move in with him instead. who do you guys think I should go with, And how do I her if I do go the other way?"}
{"id": "t3_17pupz", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "What's the strangest question you've been asked that you answered honestly?", "post": "My strangest question actually wasn't that strange, yet somehow the circumstances made it weird. \n\nI was babysitting a four year old boy who asked me what happened when you die. At this moment I was very surprised because I didn't expect a four year old asking this question. I decided to answer him as honestly and openly as I could, of course in terms that he was able to understand. We sat there talking half an hour about this, I told him that no one actually knows what happens, that some people believe in a form of afterlife while other people don't, that he doesn't need to be afraid because it happens to everyone eventually and that it's an inevitable consequence of living.\n\nI was very surprised how he reacted to this, he seemed happy and he slept well. Somehow it still is strange that he asked, though... But I was glad to answer him as honestly as I could.", "summary": "A four year old boy asked me about death and I answered honestly. When did you receive strange questions (maybe even normal questions in strange situations) that you answered faithfully to?"}
{"id": "t3_2u275e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can i[19M] be certaint of a girl's[16F] feelings towards me?", "post": "First of all i am sorry if this isn't the right subreddit to post this to,if it's not then just tell me and i'll delete the post righ away.\n\nThere's this girl i've been texting to for a few months,we skyped,talked on the phone for countless hours we text eachother everyday until sunset and stuff like that.\n\nWe call eachother cute names like ''my love'' ''my angel'' stuff like that she constantly tells me that she loves me and i tell her all the time that i love her too,she always tells me that she miss me and that she want to be in my arms,she always says ''i'm yours''(even though i never know how to respond to that),she wants me to be her first and that she'd love me even with my body (i have a big problem with my physical appeareance)\n\ni really love her,still we haven't met,i'm supposed to go meet her on the 14th of february,you know for valentine's day  and i'll bring her a rose and her favorite chocolate..but for some reason i'm unsure about her feelings..\n\nor maybe that's not it but there's definetly something weird about all this and i can't put my finger on it..i have difficulties about trusting people,i try my best to trust her.\n\nshe says i'm the one she loves,yet sometime she shows herself to old guys and i don't know how to react..sorry if this post make no sense at all..", "summary": "met this girl online a few months ago,been texting and saying cute stuff to eachothers,want to meet her but unsure about her feelings,or maybe that's not it,what do i do?"}
{"id": "t3_1vjbw0", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, my adult brother is very obese. As a family we are very concerned about his health. My mum cries often. We have tried to talk to him in the past but he blocks us out of his life for a few weeks and remains in stubborn silence. How can we get through to him that we want him to be healthy?", "post": "More\n\nWe don't want him to be thin to be more attractive or so that we will love him more, but we are convinced that he will be the first of us to die, beating even our parents.\n\nHe has been fat for twenty years, living alone and creating a now very long-term habit of unhealthy food and no exercise. \n\nHe doesn't seem depressed or unhappy, but I don't kid myself into thinking that he is satisfied with his life.\n\nMy mother has tried offering him every surgery, program, theraphy, etc, known to man with all expenses paid. My dad has done the same. One drunken night I told him he would get diabetes, lose a foot, go blind, etc, by message.\n\nWe walk on egg shells so as not to hurt him and not to push him away from us, but I feel we need to do everything we can to help him lose the weight (though I have no idea if he is even trying).", "summary": "Reddit, how do you help a very stubborn, private adult begin to lose weight when mentioning the very subject to him is greeted by a poker faced silence?"}
{"id": "t3_ob7qp", "subreddit": "personalfinance", "title": "Advice on graduate school?", "post": "**(Let me know if there's a better subreddit for this or if it has been profusely addressed before. I have been browsing this subreddit for a while and have not come across it.)**\n\nI am 23, recently financially independent, with a degree in Linguistics that by itself doesn't do much, but coupled with a Master's could be quite useful. However, getting my masters would put me about $40,000 in the hole. I just started off, am NOT currently in debt, and don't really want to start my financially independent life by going in debt. \nWhen I went to undergrad, my dad paid for everything and I didn't have to worry about financial aid, so I have no idea how it works and have never dealt with the system. My question(s) is/are:\n\n1. I know some people get living stipends and tuition wavers for graduate school. How common is this? Have you done so before?\n2. Would you recommend going to graduate school? Right now I am making $23,000 a year and with a degree in speech language pathology could be making significantly more (and it's a field I'm interested in.)\n\nBasically (", "summary": "), as someone who used to be all sheltered and whatnot, I am asking for help from those of you who have dealt with the woes of not having the money for school, but wanting to go anyway."}
{"id": "t3_4184e5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Despite knowing how I feel for [18F] I[22M] don't know what to do or how to approach this situation.", "post": "I met this girl who is actually amazing in every way. I haven't met anyone like her ever and I don't just mean her perfect appearance. I always tell her that even her personality is amazing and one of the greatest I've see. \n\nAnyways, I feel so in love with her even though I'm sure it's not love since I'm dumb, but I don't know how to deal with this. I don't want to stop talking to her at all because we get along so well and apparently I'm the only person she really talks to because \"there's nothing to talk about with other people\" and she's the only person I respond to without thinking as much. \n\nMy problem is she doesn't want to date anyone right now and feels like it might be forever but she's still young. I don't know what to do. I can just stay hurt and keep her in my life until she decides otherwise or I can cut this right now and feel depressed for a while (which I already feel a toll from).", "summary": "I like this girl a lot and I dont know if I should end our friendship based off her not wanting to date anyone"}
{"id": "t3_1a157z", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "Possibly pregnant, would like input on options. [m18] [f17]", "post": "So I screwed up big time and had unprotected sex with a girl from out of town. She was in the area and we've been texting/calling pretty frequently for the last two months. Anyways, we did the deed without any birth control. I pulled out but I'm not sure if it was in time, so the next day we got her some Next Choice and she took the first dose 10 hours after we did it, then took the second dose 12 hours later. I think our chances that she isn't pregnant are decent, but I'd like some input on options if she is because I can't really talk about it with anyone. She's religious so abortion isn't an option. She's already attending college but if she's pregnant that will really throw a wrench in the works. I'm currently in my last semester of high school and have plans to begin college in the fall. I don't think this is possible for someone who has a child to raise. Are there any military options for me? I have a decent ASVAB score.", "summary": "(stupidly) Had unprotected sex. Took Next Choice. Still worried, I want advice on options if she is pregnant. Determined to make the best of whatever situation ends up happening"}
{"id": "t3_278bb6", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [17 M] and my freind[18F]: Should I still ask her to date me with college around the corner?", "post": "Hi guys, little bit new to reddit and this side of it so let me know if I did something wrong with my post.\n\nA little info about us:\nWe both just graduated high school, she is going out of state, I'm staying in state. I met her because she was one of my mom's best students at her school. Lost touch for about two months then reconnected on her accord, went out a few times, texted a lot, decided we would go to prom together. \n\nA little info on me: I enjoy focusing on fitness and am a pretty active person overall, but I am a nerd in terms of gaming and movies/tv etc. I have never kissed a girl before (you know where that goes).\n\nA little info on her: Studious (valedictorian of her school), kind to everyone, hard to read (in terms of feelings). I'm unsure about how strong her feelings are for me. I am usually the one to ask her if she wants to do something. Not sure if she has dated anyone in the past.\n\nHere's the catch: She has already told me that she does not want to date anyone before college, but she is the first person  I have had strong feelings for in the past couple of years. College for us starts in August.", "summary": "Should I still ask her to date me with the chance of rejection and losing her freindship forever or should I wait until next year when everybody is settled in and perhaps feelings have changed?"}
{"id": "t3_1mnaqj", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Why are vaccines seen as such a black and white issue when, all bullshit aside, there is reason for healthy skepticism?", "post": "The autism link is bullshit. The evidence was falsified to begin with, Jenny McCarthy is an idiot, etc, etc. Vaccines have also, on the whole, been an enormous boon to the health of humanity, saving more lives than anything else ever (probably). The evidence here is overwhelming.\n\nAnd yet, the \"vaccines are good and everyone should them\" mentality is too simplistic. The issue has many angles, and in a community that often engages in exploring and exposing the more hidden side of things I am consistently surprised by the vociferous down-voting and down-shouting of any opinion that questions the aggressive vaccine schedule recommended by the CDC.\n\nThe fact is, every medication--vaccines included--carries a real set of risks. Medications are, or should be, given as the least-bad alternative: the risks associated with giving the medicine are outweighed by the rewards of giving the medicine. Each vaccine has its own risk/reward profile, and for that reason each warrants individual consideration. The CDC has given this consideration to the vaccines that are on (and not on) the recommended schedule, but that doesn't mean all medical professionals are in agreement regarding the schedule or even the need for all vaccines, nor does it mean that all individuals should refrain from individually investigating each vaccine should they so desire.\n\nThere are vested interests in the vaccination schedule, and the CDC is heavily lobbied by the pharmaceutical industry that produces the vaccines we all pay for through our private insurance carriers. This does not necessarily mean that we are having vaccines pushed on us that we don't really need, potentially at risk to our health (however minimal that risk may be), but the incentive is definitely there. Big companies make big money with a more aggressive vaccination schedule. This is as indisputable as is the evidence that vaccines do not cause autism.\n\nSo why not some actual skeptical discussion instead of the blind faith attached to the recommended vaccine schedule? Why not a little more critical thinking and consideration?", "summary": "There are valid reasons to question the recommended vaccine schedule in the US. Why does the majority of reddit fail to even consider them?"}
{"id": "t3_kk357", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do people get over embarrassment about bodily functions?", "post": "21F, my boyfriend is 22, dating for a year and a half.\n\nOne of the things that makes me most self conscious are bodily functions, particularly the ones related to the colon. I've always been overweight and somehow I relate this to colon problems 'cause I think it makes me really gross farting fatty or something. I have a terribly sensitive colon, and almost anything makes it upset. Most of the time, it's just gas, but it's a lot of it, especially in the night. Lately, I've been sleeping over at my boyfriend's, and you probably can guess where this is going. Sometimes I can't sleep at all for hours because of the effort I put into not letting one rip. When I go to the toilet, even if it's only peeing, and a fart comes out, I feel like I want the toilet to swallow me right up.\n\nTo make things worse, I have the most proper boyfriend I could find. He won't even shower with me 'cause he's too shy about... something, I still haven't even figured it out, maybe washing his genitals I figure. The rest of our relationship is beautiful though, we get along really well, we're very sincere to each other and we even have a healthy and active sex life.\n\nI actually think this is pretty stupid, but it's really bringing me down. I've been getting real serious about this guy, thinking about living together long-term and all, and it just drives me crazy thinking about how I will work around this stuff. So, how do I talk to him about this? How should I act? Won't it be terribly awkward to be sitting there playing games and just... farting? This is really driving me crazy.", "summary": "I have a farting problem, but my boyfriend is too proper and I'm too shy about it. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_4bst4l", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [24F] with my BF [26 M] 2 years, I don't know if I kissed someone else", "post": "Hey everyone, I'm having a hard time and need some advice on what to do. I started dating my boyfriend about 2 years ago. We have a steady relationship and we're very happy.\n\nEarly in the relationship, I went to my friends cousin's house to hang out. My bf didn't come. We were all hanging out and drinking and another of my friend's cousins who I had kissed a few years back showed up. \n\nI got really drunk. The cousin was trying really hard to sleep with me, I kept saying no and he knew I had a boyfriend. \n\nEventually I blacked out. I found out in the morning that the guy kept trying to get me to sleep in his bed with him which I refused (thank god). However someone told me that i was leaning against him on the couch and she wasnt sure but he may have been kissing my neck.\n\nI felt absolutely disgusted after I found this out. I had a huge talk with my friend and she thought it was best for me not to mention it to my boyfriend because it was a new relationship and I had been adamant that I didn't want to hook up with him. I didn't say anything to him.\n\nI hadn't really thought about it much until recently. About six months ago I came to terms with the fact that I have an alcohol abuse problem. I've been sober now for three months. I've been seeing things much more clearly now and this event is really starting to bother me. \n\nI know nothing like this will ever happen again, because I am confronting my problem, and I'll never let myself be in that state again. I can't. \n\nMy question is, do I talk about this with my boyfriend or will it cause too much unwarranted pain now that it's been so long?", "summary": "Got too drunk, might have kissed someone else. After addressing alcoholism I don't know whether I should tell my bf."}
{"id": "t3_1frlo5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How do I (f17) get my boyfriend (m18) to stop smoking cigarettes?", "post": "We've been together for a year and 7 months now. We both drink, smoke pot, and smoke cigarettes occasionally. I take an 'everything in moderation' approach to cigarettes - If I'm at a party or in a large group and they're there, then I might have one. He used to be completely against smoking (his parents are both smokers), then he started. He told me it was only sociable smoking (like me). Now he's begun smoking them frequently, and he told me he's addicted. I really want him to stop. Having a nicotine addiction is unhealthy, expensive and hearing him cough all the time is getting really fucking annoying. How should I go about this? He told me he's not willing to quit.", "summary": "Boyfriend recently became addicted to cigarettes, I don't like it at all. How can I help him realize this isn't good?"}
{"id": "t3_3nj798", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "My girlfriend doesn't want to sleep with me", "post": "and she claims it's because of the anti-depressant she started taking a few months ago. we never had any sort of issue in the past, and while I know it's a common side effect of many drugs (I'm on some myself), I can't help but feel it's something to do with me.\n\nit's not that we won't sleep together, but she never starts anything any more, and if we do have sex, it's usually painful for her. I told her how it was concerning to me and bothering me, but she kind of puts it off to the side and it's something that is seriously bothering me. if I ask, she'll rarely not be up for it, but it doesn't seem like she's enjoying it at this point, which is something that makes it not enjoyable for either of us. I've brought up my concerns and she's dismissed them as silly, but when I ask her to try and take another drug or talk to her doctor about it, it just goes nowhere.", "summary": "girlfriend doesn't want to have sex because of (perhaps) antidepressants but I feel shitty because I think it's somehow related to me. what do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_2uz5v0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [32 m] with my wife [30 f] 10 years, she travels for work and sometimes I feel jealous.", "post": "Here's the deal, my wife and I have talked in the past about the fact that I get jealous sometimes when she travels for work. It's usually when she goes to conferences that have multiple late night parties and stays out late. I'd call that my main trigger. \n\n.\n\nIn that context she's usually hanging out with groups of people she works with frequently but its still hard knowing that she's out so late going to clubs and bars and parties.\n\n.\n\nRight now I'm dealing with a new situation,  she went to a trade show as opposed to a conference. Shes hosting a booth, the guys in the booth next door to her invited her to come out for dinner at 5. anyways she said that she just didn't want to eat alone.  I knew I was starting to feel jealous but I told her to have a good time and just ignored it. I did ask her to send me a text message when she got back to her hotel room safe and sound. Part of it is also not trusting a bunch of random guys\n\n.\n\nCome 1:45 in the morning tonight I had still not gotten a text message. \n\n.\n\nI texted her to see if she was alright she said she was \"Great, I'm heading back to my room now.\" Am I crazy for being super jealous right now?\n\n.\n\nMaybe.\n\n.\n\nHow do I deal with these feelings? \n\n.\n\nWhat should I say to her about her staying out and my feelings about? \n\n.", "summary": "I struggle with jealousy and my wife and I have talked about it in the past and the reasons for it. It's definitely been triggered tonight and I'm wondering how to talk to her about it?"}
{"id": "t3_11aub7", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [F,22] am having sexytime issues in my casual relationship with M,[23]", "post": "So M[23] and I [F,22] have been essentially friends with benefits for 6 months now. This hasn't been a GF/BF kind of thing at all, we aren't 'dating', we are just playing around a couple of times a week.\n\nNow this was was all going swimmingly until about a month ago. Normally he initiates sexytimes (not because of a lack of interest or any shyness from my part, he just beats me to it) however this night I decided that I would (**NB:** first time I have initiated). So we were lying in bed in such a way that I had easy access to his nether regions and so reached down for a little pants action. He grabs my wrist and pulls my arm away telling me that I \"don't have to\" to which I replied that I know that, but I *want* to.\nAnyway, that wasn't good enough, and sexytimes did not occur. I was a little hurt/worried. Had I been doing it wrong the whole time? Or am I not attractive to him anymore?\nWhatever, maybe I do just suck at handjobs, but I was a little hurt and  feeling a bit... ugly (for want of a better way to describe the feeling).\n\nNow, after this little moment, and since, there has still been sleepovers, but there has been no sexual activity. \nSo I am confused, I thought that's what we were doing? It now feels kind of like sharing a bed with a cousin, just a bit of chat, and then sleep. \n\nI don't really know how to approach this seeing as I am **not** the GF, so how do I do so without sounding too desperate/clingy/crazy? I don't feel comfortable initiating it seeing as the first/only time I did, I was stopped.", "summary": "we have been seeing each other *casually* for 6 months, sexytime ended approximately one month ago after I attempted to initiate? How to fix this?"}
{"id": "t3_jrmye", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "To those who have taken a temporary break/hiatus in their relationships with their SO.", "post": "We've been together almost 2 years.  I'm 27, she will be 27 in a couple months.  She is a very emotional person and is having continual stress issues with her job, her family, and problems in our relationship that stem from lack of communication.  I live alone in a 1br apartment.  She lives alone in a condo.\n\nBasically the problem has become that over the months, she has been consistently stressed out to the point where I will call her and she will describe it as having a meltdown and that she is not able to progress in her personal and professional life, usually because of simple things like not having time to clean her house, and not feeling adequate at work, respectively.  (even tho at work they all said they like her).  This has happened more than a few times.\n\nI don't have a lot of stress in my life so I don't know what shes going through, but I feel it is not normal.  I did find out last night that when she was in college, she saw a therapist for this same reason.  I have been supportive but it has been consistent for so long that it is taking its toll on me as well and just causing more issues.\n\nSo last night we had a long discussion, and it ended with us both agreeing (more reluctantly on her part) that we need to take a step back.  We decided to take a temporary break to allow both of us to have quality time with ourselves and get some perspective.\n\nI love her and neither of us want to break up permanently.  But if things don't get better we can't keep destroying ourselves.\n\nHas anyone ever done this temporary break thing before? How did it work out? How exactly do you \"do\" it anyway?  Any other advice would be greatly appreciated.", "summary": "Stress in my girlfriend's life has been constant and is taking it's toll on both of us.  We decided to take a temporary break to get some perspective and be ourselves.  Advice would be appreciated on this process!"}
{"id": "t3_uxm02", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Recommendations for I/O Psychology Graduate Programs?", "post": "I'm in junior standing right now where I'm supposed to figure out what I need to do with my life (grad school vs full-time job) and so I intended to go to grad school for a Masters and be done with school forever.  The thing is I don't know what schools are truly good and worth their money for I/O programs.  I've already crossed-searched to narrow it down to these and could narrow it further: CSU Long Beach, CSU San Bernardino, CSU San Francisco, San Jose State, San Diego State, Chapman University, and Claremont Graduate University.  Yes? No? I should just travel back in time and start over?\n\nI am firm about staying in California for grad studies and if I/O doesn't work out, maybe MBA might?  I would only stick around for my 4th year to buy time with getting research, internships, and minor in business administration.  Would it even work out if I get a really good GMAT score with a minor in business administration?", "summary": "Recommended I/O grad programs that may be overlooked from searches.  Optional to answer last question pertaining to MBA decision."}
{"id": "t3_2hm5ph", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [25F] with my boyfriend [36] of 9 months, am afraid he will never love me as deeply as he loved his ex.", "post": "We have been together for about 9 months now. When we met it was instant chemistry. We both are rather impulsive and passionate people and that was very noticable at the start. \n\nHowever, he had a girlfriend about 8 years ago for about a year, whom he loved very much and it took him until me to get over her. Now, I've never met anyone who took that long to get over their ex so that fact alone already makes me insecure. Their relationship was very passionate, though also very dysfunctional. They were miserable. He was very jealous and couldn't work or do anything besides 'being' in that relationship.\n\nIt seemed to kind of be that way with us at the start, but somehow it changed. And I fear - constantly - that she will always be his great love. We argue a lot too, so it's not all dull, but when we do, most of the time he is able to go on about his day & work. I can't, and he couldn't with his ex. He says he needed her, but does not need me but chooses to be with me. He does say he loves me a lot, and he absolutely wants our relationship and our life & never thinks about her anymore. But he doesn't seem to be as intense with me as with her. He doesn't seem to love me more, and I don't know how to feel about that. He says he loves me better. He wants us to have a love, but to also have a life beside our love. \n\nAm I in the wrong for wanting him to love me as intensely?", "summary": "I am afraid my boyfriend loved his ex more passionately than he loves me, and I don't know how to feel about that."}
{"id": "t3_rg0zm", "subreddit": "dogs", "title": "A Different Sort of Dog Park Question", "post": "Background: I have a 120 pound Bernese Mountain Dog that is a great big baby. He greets with perfect manners, and he thinks that little dogs are just about the greatest thing in the world. He LOVES them, and he learned very quickly that if he wants to hang out with them he has to stay perfectly still so that he doesn't step on one.  So when we're at the dog park around new dogs, his approach is typically to stand perfectly still and wait for dogs to come to him.  He never demonstrates any aggressive posturing.  \n  \nYet without fail, dogs always hate my dog.  They approach him to greet, then end up getting scared and snapping at him. I can only guess that they're intimidated by his size, because he does not move at all. I know he's also fairly oblivious to the body language of other dogs, so when at the park I always keep him leashed so that I can pull him away the second I suspect another snapper.  But every time a dog snaps at him, he gets this utterly heartbroken expression and acts dejected for the next half hour.    \n  \nI'd really like my dog to be able to play with the other dogs off leash, but I don't know how to facilitate that happening.  He's not doing anything other than failing to run away; it's the other dogs that approach him, then attack him while he does absolutely nothing.  \n  \nDoes anyone have any suggestions?  Should I just give up dog parks?  Is my poor boy doomed never to have any little dog friends?  Is there something I can do to help him learn when to walk away? Thanks in advance for any advice!", "summary": "My dog love little dogs, they hate him.  He gets snapped at every single dog park visit. Is there something I can do differently, or should I just give up dog parks?"}
{"id": "t3_1w758e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19M] am not sure how to ask out girl in class at new university [19? F]", "post": "I just transferred to a new university a week ago so I've already got a bit on my plate, but I am already pretty attracted to a girl in one of my classes. It's not that big of a class and there are desks and I sat next to her last class so getting close to her shouldn't be that much of a problem.\n\nThe problem is that I really don't know how to ask her out. I'm pretty inexperienced at dating, but in this case I don't know her name, nor do I no pretty much anything about the area I live in. It's a decent sized city so there's stuff to do I'm sure.\n\nHow do I approach her and ask her out when all I know about the situation is a class she's in?", "summary": "just transferred, like girl, don't know her name or city we're in, but wanna go on date with her."}
{"id": "t3_2pwoux", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I lied [38 F] to my BF [40 M] about my lack of relationships and virginity. Do I ever tell him?", "post": "I lost my virginity two weeks ago to the most wonderful man I have ever met, and he has no idea that I was a virgin before that night. \n\nI had never seen a man naked, had never intimately touched a man, or been touched like that myself!  I thought that I would be found out after the deed, but he thinks that I am great in bed!! (Thanks r/sex for the great guides and advice)\n\nWe have been close friends for over a year and during that time I lied to him about past boyfriends by saying that my longest relationship was 18 months (it was 3 months) and by telling him that I lived with someone for 6 months (I have never shared my home with anyone).\nI also told him that I have been with 6 people, because I was so very ashamed to be a virgin at my age. My family and friends have never found out. I have only admitted it to a therapist once and I broke down in tears as I said it. I was humiliated.\n\nI did not know at the time that I would become so close to him and that I would lose my virginity to him. The lies have become so deep that it has become incredibly difficult to tell him the truth.\n\nWhat should I do? \n\nI can see myself with him long term. Perhaps even longer. I can keep this to myself, as I can tell him that I do not want to talk about past relationships but I feel afraid that if he ever found out he would be devastated.\n\nI truly think that I am psychologically unable to confess the truth. I am so ashamed of what my life has been for the past 20 years. This is my first chance at true happiness and I feel like a normal person. I have never felt this way before.\n\nAny advice would be welcome.", "summary": "I was a virgin with no relationship experience but I lied to my current BF and he thinks I am experienced. What do I do?"}
{"id": "t3_1pxs31", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My (21F) boyfriend's (20M) parents just ruined a big decision. Rant and advice?", "post": "We've been dating for almost five years. We were planning on moving in together in the next few weeks - not with just the two of us, but with some roomies - and his parents told him that they don't want him living with me.\n\nI get that we're both young, but this is a serious relationship, we've been planning this for a year and his parents have known about it and never said anything.\n\nMy parents are out of pocket because I can't afford my rent by myself, and me moving out with him was going to stop that. His parents are very well off so don't care.\n\nHis parents have ruined what was supposed to be an amazing step for us, and what was supposed to take a load of mine and my parents shoulders. I don't know how to deal with this situation and neither does he. He's been at college (or on campus boarding) for the past three years but his parents are saying he needs \"guy time\" before living with me.\n\nWHAT THE HELL. How do I deal with this??", "summary": "His parents won't let him move in with me, I'm now broke as are my parents and I'm heartbroken."}
{"id": "t3_287d0e", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22/F] boyfriend [21/M] of 5.5 years packed up his stuff and left without much warning.", "post": "My boyfriend of 5.5 years decided that he needed to leave me with little to no warning. I arrived home to him with all of his stuff packed. It's been 3 days and I have not heard a word from him.\n\nA little back story. We started dating when we were 16 and since then have been head over heals for each other. We moved away from home together about a year ago so that I could finish my 4 year degree. He moved with me to support me financially and the agreement was as soon as I graduated,  spring of 2015, I would support him through school. We've been through a lot together and I supported him much of our relationship because his dad was sick and didn't have a job. All of a sudden after almost a year of living here he decides,  he can no longer support me because it is too much for him and he feels I am holding him back. \n\nI forfeited going to 4 year school for him and stayed home and went to Community College FOR HIM, I supported him emotionally and financially for 4 years and he can't handle one more year of taking care of me?? I am completely heartbroken. Of course things between us weren't perfect but I never thought they were so bad he would just up and leave me high and dry. I was pretty blindsided. Now I will more than likely have to move out of my apartment and I have no idea how I'm going to make it through the rest of the summer let alone the rest of the year. \n\nI am still in love with him but he crushed my heart when he was already out the door.", "summary": "how am I supposed to move on from the person I love when he won't even talk to me? And how do I go on with out him?"}
{"id": "t3_50vwr1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [29 M] am dating multiple people. How do I navigate this situation?", "post": "I had always dated monogamously since the first date, and for reasons related to a past experience of trauma I opened myself up to the possibility of dating around. (Long story, but this is actually a healthy development for me and is one encouraged by my therapist).  \n\nSo I'm seeing three different guys right now. One is an old fling who, to be honest, is mostly just somebody I have a more physical relationship with. Pretty simple, no complications.\n\nThe second is a guy I've been seeing for about two months now. We have lots of fun together, great convo, but nothing has been defined yet. While I can't prove it without flat-out asking, I'm pretty positive he's seeing other people, too. I'm also pretty sure what he and I have is a really casual dynamic. It's not no strings attached, but it's not a serious relationship, either.\n\nThe third is a guy I've started seeing more recently. I really like him! He's smart, handsome, engaging\u2014if I'm going to be honest, he might be one I'd choose out of the three, but I'm not sure. It could just be the rush of getting to know someone new. (I felt like this for guy number two in the beginning, too). \n\nI've read number of articles online about the benefits of dating multiple people at once and what to do when you think you've found someone you'd like to focus all your attention and energy on. I'm not sure I'm cognizant of how to transfer that to my life, though. At what point do I make the decision to become exclusive with someone? I'm not sure how to navigate these waters, and I should admit I'm pretty bad at deciphering my own emotions. And do I disclose that I'm seeing other people? (My friends are actually split on that: Some say yes, others say no; some say monogamy is always assumed, others say it is never).", "summary": "I'm dating multiple guys. Nothing has been defined with any of them. How do I navigate this, and at what point do I make a decision to be exclusive with one of them?"}
{"id": "t3_23h9s8", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21 M] Got broken up with by my SO [20 F] of over a year less than a month ago, feeling pretty depressed and could use some people to talk to...", "post": "I was broken up with by my girlfriend of over a year a little less than a month ago. We really, really bonded over the time we were dating. She went from having some serious emotional walls to being open, loving, relaxed, and supportive. She made me feel special, attractive, and important in the kind of ways I've so often had trouble with. She really made me take a better look at myself, and realize what a worthwhile, strong, successful person I can be. We connected on a really wonderful, intimate level.\n\nWe actually spent a lot of time talking about pretty serious long term plans. She always wanted to see NYC, and over last summer, I got to be with her when we visited. It was a fantastic trip, and a fantastic time. We'd talked about spending some time living in New York. We talked about getting married, about a family. Silly shit, being college kids and all, but stuff that felt... earnest. I've had relationships before, and for the first time, I really, really felt like I could spend the rest of my life with her.\n\nShe broke up with me, not over any issue, not because something happened, she just... 'lost that spark', and had a hard time feeling like she loved me properly. She wanted to be honest, and be fair to me. She said I hadn't done anything wrong, that I'd been a wonderful boyfriend, and that she was afraid because she didn't want to ruin such a close bond. We've since been trying to be friends, we hung out a bit, played basketball, grabbed dinner. Tried making new habits to counterbalance the things we weren't doing anymore. Things have been hard because, as of a few weeks ago, she left school to return home due to some outside influences. We haven't really talked like we used to. She's started seeing a good friend of hers back home.\n\nMy friends are all doing their own thing right now. Watching shows, going out or whatever. Nobody is really around. And here I am, feeling like I lost one of the closest friends I had, and I don't know what to do...", "summary": "Got broken up with, but not for any real negative reason. Ex-girlfriend left college and I'm feeling like I lost a close friend. Just need someone to talk to..."}
{"id": "t3_337iqy", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by wandering into a stranger's house at 1 AM", "post": "This happened last night and since i've been a lurker forever I figured this wouldn't be a bad first post. :D\n\nSo, it's 12am, and I'm out camping with my friends. Everyone's asleep except for me. I realized that home was only a mile or so away, and me being my extremely bored and stupid self, I decide to play a trick on my friends.\nA few hours previously we had hot dogs roasted over the campfire, and no camper in the right mind would forget to bring ketchup to a camping trip with hot dogs.\nI made a messy trail of ketchup leading into the woods which was only a few meters away from where my tent was. Made sure to use as much as possible so it would still be there in the morning. I proceeded to leave the camp.\nI was almost exactly sure where I was going. I live in a suburb with nearly identical houses so you can see how this fuck up happened. Keep in mind that it's pitch black outside, this is about 1am. I typically enter my house through the sliding glass door at the back because it's always unlocked. I walked up to my door, surprised to see it locked. I'm just tired and want to sleep now so I thoughtlessly walked up the stairs to the deck and tried the door up there. I made it in half asleep, and started across into my room. I was halfway there when I realized that this wasn't my house and a 12-13 year old girl was staring at me from the living room in shock.\nImmediately I dash out the back and around to the street. I made it to my own house (and I did check, it was my house.) I pretty much just collapsed on my bed when I made it to my room.\nNow it's 8am, I checked my phone and saw a couple of missed calls and texts, from my friends reading things along the lines of lol nice try.\" I was sort of relieved they didn't fall for it at that point, even though I didn't really expect them to.", "summary": "Went camping, at midnight pranked friends then wandered into a stranger's house thinking it was mine. Would've been so much worse if my friends fell for the prank"}
{"id": "t3_1x5vx2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (21M) need help on how to proceed with this girl I'm seeing/sleeping with (20F)", "post": "Hi everyone, first time posting here, I posted in relationshipadvice with a throwaway but fuck it it doesn't get much traffic, and I meed guidance - this girl and I are in college. I'm a year ahead of her and we met through a mutual friend and kind of hit it off. Since about November we've been hooking up, each time we go out together she ends up sleeping over and we have sex, cuddle and chat in the mornings, etc. She had previously been in a long term relationship before coming to college and ended it about a month before we started hooking up. \n\nHere's the thing - she says she doesn't want anything serious between us. The problem is I'm freaking infatuated with this girl and can't stop thinking about her - we get along so well and sex is great. We just click, yet she is adamant about just being fuckbuddies-ish and not getting serious. (I say 'ish' because I don't know what the fuck we are) Don't get me wrong, I'm always down for a no strings attached thing but I'm afraid I've got myself in too deep.. I'm really starting to develop feelings and don't know how to proceed. Another thing to note is she's slept with 2 people, her ex boyfriend and myself while I've slept with 14 (she knows this) which could impact her decision? Maybe.\n\nAnyways, I don't want to tell her all that in case she gets cold feet/nervous that I'm more into her, yet she's always sending mixed signals. Like, she told me shed be super jealous if I ever hooked up with another girl and we talk daily (texting, calls, on campus) yet she doesn't seem to want to be \"exclusive\" even though we basically are... I'm just really looking for some guidance here. I'm fine with going with the flow, but at this point'im scared getting too involved will end in me getting hurt. Any advice?", "summary": "I have feelings for my fuckbuddy that I'm not sure she reciprocates, but she seems to want to. What should I do?"}
{"id": "t3_mvrg8", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Legal repercussions?", "post": "This past weekend I was going to drop my boyfriend at his class, while I was backing out of his parking and actually bumped a car behind me. It was raining cats and dogs so I hopped out of the car, checked for damage and didn't see any so I got back in my car and drove my boyfriend to his class, figuring I'd leave my information when I got back just in case. It had stopped raining by the time I got back and so I left my information under his windshield wipe and headed back to my university which is about 2 hours from my boyfriends. It apparently began raining extremely hard again and my boyfriend reports that the paper I left my information on is waterlogged and destroyed and that there might have been a dent that I didn't notice in the rain. What should I do here Reddit.", "summary": "Backed up into a guys car in a typhoon, one witness, left to drop boyfriend off at class and came back to leave info. Info washed away, slight damaged to car that I didn't notice. What do?"}
{"id": "t3_109ju9", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My Dad is trying to tell me I can't pick a certain day for my wedding because hunting season opens. I think he can go hunting one day later. Reddit who is the Diva here?", "post": "I have always wanted a fall wedding and so I'm hoping to have my wedding on October 4th 2014. My Dad is being kind of an ass and telling me I can't because that is the day moose opens. I also can't have it at any point during moose season, which means I can't have a fall wedding because moose season is all of October. He says I can have it in September but where I live the leaves aren't turned yet in September and even early October is risky but I'm trying to not have it right in the middle of moose season. It's not like we rely on him getting a moose to eat or anything like that either, it is recreational for him. He goes moose hunting every single year and it causes him to miss every single thanksgiving (Canada) so I think he can suck it up and go 1-2 days late so I can have my wedding when  I want. He says I'm being a diva, I say he is. Am I over reacting reddit? Should I move my wedding day?", "summary": "I want my wedding on a day that happens to be opening day of moose season, dad says no he doesn't want to miss any days of moose hunting. Who is in the wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_3z266a", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me (F/19) don't know what to do/expect from this guy (M/21)", "post": "Okay, so, we met online, and we dated (because we live in the same city). We are together for 7 months, but he isn't my boyfriend. It's kinda weird for me, he is really good and polite and smart, but not romantic at all. We have a lot in common and it's really calming to be in his presence , but there is no passion from his side. He doesn't want sex, he doesn't want me to meet his parents (even though he knows mine).\n\n It's really weird, because he doesn't hide me, I hang out with his friends, but he doesn't want to post anything with me anywhere. I really like him a lot, but it seems like he doesn't want anything serious with me, not even a relationship. \n\nSometimes I have the urge to just tell him that, and every time I start, he says he doesn't want to go fast. But it's been 7 months. Then I end up crying at home and I want to dump him because he's a coward, but I can't because I think I'm in love...", "summary": "He (21) is a good guy, but I'm afraid he doesn't want anything serious with me (19).  How should I react?"}
{"id": "t3_2bm06n", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Question about how to handle myself after a break up. Me [22M] and my [22F] ex girlfriend", "post": "Hey, first time post on here and I'm unsure how to handle myself.\n\nAbout last October (in 2013) I broke up with my long time girlfriend. We dated for about 6 years, throughout most of high school and a large portion of college. She was the first girl I dated and I really did care for her. I broke up with her because we were both abusive towards each other, physically (nothing extremely drastic but I have a scar on my arm because of her) and verbally.\n\nWe decided to stay friends after the break up and all seemed to be going well. However, I noticed that almost immediately (within like 2 weeks) after we broke up this guy she met from a club started hitting on her. She claims to have no attraction towards him but anyone with a pair of eyes can see there's a mutual attraction. Now I don't like this guy because he was hitting on her while we were still dating. I just got onto Facebook today to see her and a picture of him together celebrating his 21st birthday.\n\nI know I'm the one that broke it off and it's my fault for doing so, but I can't help but feel...betrayed? Is that normal? How should I handle myself? I feel like I want to punch something, as I still find myself caring for her, but that would only break my hand. I'm at a loss as to what to think/feel and I don't have anyone else around I can talk to about this. So, anyone have any thoughts?", "summary": "Ex girlfriend of a long term relationship almost immediately starts flirting with another guy after I end the relationship. I am confused and feel betrayed and would welcome any kind of input."}
{"id": "t3_26cbi1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [26f] deleted my ex [32m] off of Facebook After amicable breakup. I want to add him back on... Who do you think?", "post": "We broke up a little less than two weeks ago. Although the breakup was amicable, it was one sided and I was hurt at the time. I deleted him and all pics of us together. I wasn't thinking, I was just being rash. That was far from what I wanted to do. I don't want to send the message that I wanted to cut him out of my life. \n\nWell, he noticed it and bought it up during our last interaction. I explained to him why and said I regretted it immediately after and he simply said to add him back on when I'm ready.\n\nYesterday, I learned that he is upset/bitter about it. And he has been avoiding me. We have a mutual group of friends and they've been taking turn hanging out with each of us individually. I'm thinking it's due to me deleting him (?) or still torn about the breakup. \n\nI'm fine, I have no resentment or anger over the breakup. I care for him and I know he made the best choice for him. And I'm happy that he was honest with me rather than dragging me along. \nMy question is, is it okay for me to add him back on so recently after the breakup?", "summary": "deleted ex off of Facebook immediately after our breakup, he's upset about it and I regretted my action. Should I add him back on?"}
{"id": "t3_4bdcbj", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "Is MFP setting me with a too-high calorie goal?", "post": "27F/5'10\"/SW: 275 CW: 231 GW: 160\n\nFor the past three weeks, I have bounced between 231-232 without any loss. I know plateaus can happen, but I went through the typical troubleshooting steps to see if I could break it. \n\nOne of the things I wondered about is if MFP is setting my calorie intake goal too high. Currently it says I should aim for 1330 per day to lose 2 pounds a week. I didn't think anything of it until I saw a post earlier where someone mentioned determining your TDEE on your own. When I did that, it showed my calorie intake should be 1234 per day to lose 2lbs. Both were set to sedentary. \n\nAm I confused about something or is MFP setting my calorie intake goal a little too high?", "summary": "Checked MFP calorie goal set at 1330. Did own TDEE calculation that shows it should be 1234. Did I do something wrong?"}
{"id": "t3_l94fd", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My cousin touches me when I'm asleep, Reddit, what should I do?", "post": "I'm a 25 year old female, and living with my aunt and uncle until I can get back on my feet. For now, I sleep in the living room on a cot. For the past few months I have, on several occasions, awoken in the middle of the night to my cousin either touching me or standing over my bed. The touches haven't been anywhere sexual, mostly my feet, and a couple of times my leg or stomach (still incredibly uncomfortable). It has only been in the past 2 months that I have been aware of this behavior, but previous to this there have been times when he went out of his way to \"bump\" into my feet under the table, or to sit close to me and touch my arm. \n\nLately, when I have woken up to these unwanted touches, I tell him to leave me alone, and he backs off quickly, without a word. I have told my sister, who also sleeps nearby, and she tries to keep an eye out for me when she stays up late. We can't really say anything to my aunt or uncle because of our living situation, and our belief that they would take their son's side over ours, especially without proof.\n\nI find myself dreading going to sleep, and I've completely stopped talking to my cousin, opting to avoid all contact with him at all. He seems to show no remorse for his actions, especially after the first time I blatantly caught him in the act and told him for the first time to leave me alone. I can't stand this! What do I do? What's wrong with him?", "summary": "My cousin touches me when I'm asleep, I can't tell my aunt and uncle because of my living situation, what do?"}
{"id": "t3_3z3eku", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "What do I [18F] do about missing my ex boyfriend [21M]?", "post": "My ex boyfriend and I dated for about 3 years and it did have a lot of issues because of us both being so young for the duration. I broke things off before I left for college this fall and simply explained that I thought we both needed to grow and expand on our own a little bit, because we had become too reliant on one another. As many new people as I have talked to, there is nobody personality or interest wise that I click with or that I do not have to compensate for many of their traits which I never had to do with him. I feel as though we've both grown up a lot in the time we've spent apart and truly want to rekindle our relationship. I think being together from ages 14-18 for me and 17-21 for him called for a break but I miss him more than anything in the world and want nothing more than to pick up where we left off. Is it insane of me to think that anything good could come out of it?", "summary": "long term relationship ended, both had time apart to grow up, should I try to reach out and rekindle?"}
{"id": "t3_2nyels", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I kissed my ex girlfriend and she has a boyfriend.I am [M22] she is [F21]", "post": "Me and the ex dated for just shy of 3 years , normal relationship troubles, in the end I was too insecure and she wanted new experiences. We broke up 3 years ago and barely spoke through text and never saw each other in person. She even came to my brothers graduation and we didn't speak.\n\nLast week on thanksgiving eve at our local bar crawl she texts me with a picture of her and my mom and then asked where I was. I told her the next stop of the crawl and she said she would come say hi. When she gets there we just start talking instantly , she was smiling, twirling hair and biting her lip, for her means she is nervous. I lose track of time and her friends start saying they want to go to the next stop. She wants me to come and I reluctantly agree, she is \"forced\" to sit on my lap none of her friends because the car is packed.\n\nAt the next bar , same thing , we just keep talking just sucked into conversation. She has been clearly drunk the whole night and I am pretty tipsy. She says she wants to go home and not wait for her friend to go with, which as I took an opportunity to walk her home since we lived close to each other. As we walk she grabs me and holds me for \"warmth\" . \n\nWe get back to her house and she invites me inside. We go upstairs and start talking for a little , then her friend gets there, she didn't want her friend to make a mistake. So my ex decides Its better I leave. As she sees me out the door , we hugged tightly, as I was turning to go she grabbed my head and gave me on good kiss goodbye.\n\nI asked her the day after what it meant because she has a boyfriend whom she seemed to really like and be happy with. She doesn't fully answer me and tries to just end it with she was drunk. I take it for what it was as a mistake but its bothering me now, why did she do all that to me. I don't need to be with her but that just wasn't fair emotionally and I want to know why it happeenrd..", "summary": "Ex girlfriend and I drunkenly speak for first time since break up, feels from both sides, we walk home and share a kiss, next day she claims its a mistake. And I am now confused."}
{"id": "t3_1rwkoq", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "(19F) College dating/relationship advice please", "post": "Hi, so I'm a (19F) freshman at a large public university. I've got a huge crush on this amazing guy (18M, also a freshman) in my major. Since our major is rather artsy, we spend a ton of time together with classes and working in the studio (we're in the same studio group) and whatnot. As we discovered more and more common interests, we've become really good friends. A few weeks ago, we went to see the local symphony play, and we ended up deciding it was a date. We had a great time and have gone on a couple more dates since then. After 3 dates or so, we finally figured out that we like each other. Since then, we've been texting each other regularly and I got to cuddle with him for the last 10 minutes or so of this movie we watched. We're going on another date in a couple of days and I am starting to wonder if/when we should dtr. Also, when/how do I kiss him? Is it too soon? I've only known him for ~3 months.", "summary": "This awesome guy in my major and I like each other and have gone on a few dates, but we've also only known each other for 3 months. Is it too soon for us to dtr/kiss?"}
{"id": "t3_1xzlz1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[Update 2] After getting back together, my[27M] girl[27F] still talks to the guy she ended things with me for.", "post": "So you guys gave me a lot of amazing advice for my screwed up situation (which was here:  but pretty much this girl I was with ended things after I called her out for texting her ex too much, and she exploded at me, yelled at me for accusing her, and then proceed to go to ex's house.)  \n\nAnyway, I've been doing a good job avoiding her even in the same social circle, but two nights ago I saw here and she was all over me, trying to hook up, saying she was sorry, that she is bad at relationships, etc.  The same thing I heard twice before when I gave her other chances and got back after we ended.  \n\nShe tried to make out with me, and I cheeked her.  It was one of the toughest things I had to do.  Reddit, I have been with a lot of girls, but she is the second one ever I've loved, which makes this really hard for me.  I feel awful, like I messed up not giving her another chance, and I know she was really upset, then wound up going to a party with these guys she knows. I can deduce what happened from there.\n\nI've been seeing other girls and even that night I wound up hooking up with someone else but all I could think about was her and upset about the whole situation.  I realize it would be dumb to give her a fourth chance, and my feelings are sadness mixed with anger towards her... how do I keep sane during this?  I feel so depressed about it all.   I know she is really upset about it too (she may have drunk social media...)", "summary": "girl treated me like shit three times and the last time was really bad. You guys helped with advice, and now she's trying to come around again. I stayed smart and rejected her advances, but I'm really depressed about it.*"}
{"id": "t3_471a03", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [21 M] don't feel a spark with this girl [18 F] I'm dating, would that mean our relationship can't work out?", "post": "I've been currently dating this girl for about two weeks now and while we're incredible affectionate to each other and have awesome conversation I just don't know if I have strong enough feelings to continue dating her. she's only the second girl I have ever dated in my life so I don't have much experience with understanding how relationships work. I've also made the mistake of saying I love you to her now she might think I'm in love with her. \n\nBut the thing that really bothers me was that on our second date we just spent most of the time just making out in my car until I ended up fingering her and eating her out (Idk why I'm just a horny virgin I guess and so is she). Anyway I like so much about her, but I don't feel a spark. I just don't want to end up wasting her time or emotionally damaging her.", "summary": "I don't feel much of a spark with this girl does that mean there no chance for our relationship? I still like so much about her, but I just don't feel the \"spark\"."}
{"id": "t3_1nzqqz", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "several years difference and at different stages in life plus long distance. anyone been through something similar with success?", "post": "so basically I'm at a point in life where I want to settle down, buy a home, start my career and go on yearly vacations and in around 5-10ys start a family.\n\nmy partner is just entering adulthood. figuring out what they want to do in life. wants to spend their money on traveling the world before \"settling down\".\n\nwe are on fundamentally different stages of our lives.\n\nI'm in my late 20s close to 30 (big freak out for me due to the expectations of what I want accomplished by then etc) they are in their very early 20s.\n\nand we live on opposite sides of the globe literally.\n\nanyone been in a similar situation with words of advice as the older party?", "summary": "trying to reconcile my feeling of wanting to settle down with the feeling of letting them be free to do what they want."}
{"id": "t3_4xtpzr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [23/F] have a crush, but still love my boyfriend [26/M].", "post": "Hey. Throwaway here...  \n\nI have a heartache. I'm in a LDR with my boyfriend of almost 2 years. I will be visiting him soon. The distance is hard, but we try to be pretty consistent about Skyping and visiting. It's less than 2 hours away by plane, so it could be a lot worse. We've been friends for five years, and he's been great. I sometimes contrive loneliness due to lack of attention, but we're both busy with full schedules. I never felt the head-over-heels attraction for him, but fell in love with him pretty gradually. He was there for me after a bad break up and eventually feelings developed. We've been together since, and for the most part I've been pretty happy.\n\nI met someone recently, and I began to realize that I was quickly developing a crush. We would message each other throughout the day when I was at work, just to talk, and I now know I look forward to it. It doesn't hurt that this guy seems to be reciprocating. I realize that having a crush isn't the end of the world and can happen to anyone, and I don't feel any desire to cheat, but I'm at such a loss on how to deal with my emotions. I haven't done anything save for talk to this guy, and I feel immense guilt because I know I'm enjoying it. I'm trying to muster up the willpower to just cut the connection before it gets harder for me, and then another part of me tells me not to. \n\nI'm not 100% sure what I'm asking, but I felt like I had no outlet and needed to get this off of my chest. I feel so mixed up. My SO knows that I'm friends with this person, knows that we talk (though he doesn't know the extent of how much we talk). I set a boundary with new guy, saying he needed to curb how much he flirted since I was in a dedicated relationship, and here I am crushing like I'm fourteen again.", "summary": "Dedicated relationship in which I love my SO and I'm crushing on another guy. Tried to set boundaries with new friend, and I'm on the verge of breaking them myself (flirting)."}
{"id": "t3_2r9qqa", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] confused by mixed signals [18F]?", "post": "Hi guys, I know It's another teenage post that isn't \"real love\". I understand it guys, but please be understanding as I'm sure you were once an adolescent in the grasp of lust. \n\nI realise dating at the work place isn't a good idea. Back story: I go to high school A, she goes to high school B. Both are close in distance. We work at the same restaurant. She has been flirting with me heavily and her friend we'll call her \"E\" has been saying that she is almost certain she likes me.\n\nI ask her out on New Years Eve, under the moon and she says I'll think about it. Fast forward a few days and I'm at work. I ask E what she thinks about \"i'll think about it\" she says it probably means no. Albeit, E does have feelings for me as well she knows that I'm really happy being with said Girl. \n\nSaid Girl I like \"M\" asks girl \"E\" if she can cover her shift as she has something to do tomorrow. I'm working with E and E can't work tomorrow so she asks me. I said I'm busy as well, because I am. She asks if I'm mad at \"M\" and I said that I'm not. She says that she has told \"M\" about our conversation about the whole \"ill think about it\" means no conversation.\n\nM texts me at the end of my shift and asks if I wanted to get dinner sometime next week. A pity date? Oh and I should mention that she said okay originally but then said i'll think about it when I couldn't think of a place to go. Pity date or wants to go with me? She is also moving in about 2 weeks, about 30 mins away, but she is still going to the same school.", "summary": "Reading makes it much more understandable, but I like girl, she said I'll think about it, her friend says it probably means no, but girl I asked texted me for date? Pity Date or Nah?"}
{"id": "t3_2v2iwi", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by accidentally groping a stranger.", "post": "Earlier today, I decided to go to the school basketball game. Everyone was having fun and we were all hyped up. There was also the school mascot who ran around getting people pumped for the game. In earlier games, a good friend of mine was the mascot and he often poked me to get my attention. Anyways, I was enjoying the game when the school mascot decided to come over and start touching my face. Assuming it was my friend, I told him to stop but he kept going so I thought it would be funny if I put my hand on his chest and stare passionately into his eyes. \n\nThe person in the mascot suit was not my friend.  I quickly realized this after staring into the eye mesh of the mascot hemlet. The mascot quickly realized what was happening, shoved my hand away and took off behind the bleachers. Realizing what had just happened, I started to ask people who was in the mascot. Not only was it not my friend, but it was a girl. I had just accidentally groped a random girl who I have never met in my life. After returning home, all I could think about was how I'm probably going to be known as a pervert who sexually harasses strangers.\n\n I have never met this person but I know her name. I don't even know what she looks like. How do I fix the situation?", "summary": "went to a basketball game, thought my friend was the mascot, groped the mascot, and realized my friend wasn't the mascot."}
{"id": "t3_1o4b4r", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "Stereotypical post school, university dilemma", "post": "So I've been going out with this girl for a year and a half during sixth form. We went to the same school for two years and now we've both gone to university. The main problem with the situation is that she has remained in the home country but I've gone abroad and my degree is for 6 years, so I'll be here for a while. Now, we'd previously decided to just break it off soon as summer was over and just stay friends, but now I've been regretting that decision. My question is if any of you think that an open-ish relationship is a good idea? Basic principle of it is that when we are separate, we talk to each other etc but what any of us does on nights out doesn't matter. Then, when we're back together for xmas easter and summer we date like normal. If not feasible, are there any suggestions? I'm basically just looking for any advice.", "summary": "dating in sixth form, now in very distant university for long time. Decided to split, changed mind now trying to see if an open relationship is a feasible option."}
{"id": "t3_10jon1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My co-worker [30f] is single and always talks about just wanting to have sex...", "post": "OK... I am currently a 26 year old male. I have been in a relationship for 8 months with a girl I am unsure of. My older co-worker who is now 30 dates guys occasionally from Match.Com. Anyways I get drinks with her as co-workers frequently (a bit less frequently in the last 5 months) and we generally get a long GREAT. Every time she gets drunk she says she can't find a guy and starts talking about how she would just like to let go of some stress. We have talked a few times about this and a few other people have mentioned it to both of us that we might be compatible. I am not the best looking guy but I do well with the ladies. Anyways I have a question.\n \"\nEssentially she tells me that we are both just friends but then just says that she wants to get laid. I always kind of bluntly play it off. I am unsure if her being like \"Yeah we are just friends\" when I say \"If we were not co-workers I would certainly be attracted to you\" is code for \"please make a move on me.\" I know she is not seeing anyone else and I think I may be in this case", "summary": "30 year old girl from work says we are just friends but then says she just wants to get laid in odd ways and gives me the impression that she only says that we are friends to avoid embarrassment. Should I make a move?"}
{"id": "t3_2c79v0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend [22/M] told me it turned him off. I'm [22/f] Read below.", "post": "I texted him and told him that I'm scared of giving birth (I'm not pregnant lol, its just a saying) because it hurts a lot when I poop and I'm on a period. It sounds gross but it wasn't too detailed. He asked me why I said it and said he will find me less attractive for saying it. Also, he said that he will never see me in a sexual way whenever it comes to sex. I got hurt when I heard that and thought he went too far. Do you agree as well? I don't know. I don't think what he did was right.", "summary": "My bf said he will find me less attractive for saying gross thing. Don't you think that's a bit too far? Any thoughts?"}
{"id": "t3_3r3vv4", "subreddit": "offmychest", "title": "I might have just embarrassed myself. Again.", "post": "I feel kinda depressed lately, mostly because of girl trouble and how I consistently embarrass myself, at least every month. But this one feels kinda different, and the outcome just depends on luck.\n\nSo, I'm in Mandarin class (on a side note, the new teacher is not that good) and I'm talking with my friend (let's call him Josh). I ask Josh about how I can start a conversation with a girl. He asks me which girl I'm talking about, and I mention this girl I've been thinking about, but not really have a crush on. Then he tells me something and I go \"Thanks.\" I should've considered a girl sitting right next to us probably heard is and told a few people. I found this out when my friend Morgan said she heard that I took girl advice from Josh. I kinda had a mini panic attack, because I started fretting if it got to that girl I'd been thinking about.", "summary": "I probably just made myself look worse to my crush, and now I feel like she's gonna think I'm weird. Can anyone help me calm down?"}
{"id": "t3_euav4", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "My girlfriend's mom is sick, and I want to be there for her. Could you give me some advice?", "post": "Hey Reddit,\n\nMy girlfriend of approximately a year and a half told me last night that her mother has cancer. She gave me very few details, as it was over the phone and she was pretty upset, but she did happen to say that there is a high rate of success if treated early with chemo. I've met both of her parents, and they are wonderful and generous people. Basically, I'm looking for advice on how to approach her and provide the right kind of emotional support. I've been very lucky so far in my life, not having gone through a situation like this with a loved one so close to me, but I think that's put me at a disadvantage in terms of knowing how to connect to my girlfriend now. My dad is an existentialist, and I share his mindset to some extent, so I'm really not the best at providing emotional support. I'm also a staunch atheist, and she's one the fence, so I want to be very careful not to interject my thoughts at a time when she might be turning to something I don't believe in. She's an amazing and beautiful girl, and I want to find a way to be more helpful through this process. Does anyone have suggestions about what to say on a daily basis, and maybe how to treat things through the longer term? Don't be afraid to point out the obvious, I don't want to miss anything. \n\nThis is a throwaway account, as you can see from my history and obvious lack of kharma. My close friends know my username and that I'm often on here, and given the nature of the situation, I don't want them knowing about this. She's asked that I not tell any of our friends.\n\nThanks so much everyone. I know this is a sad post, and it is a big holiday, so any time that you take to give this a thought and perhaps a response would be amazing, thank you. Be safe tonight.", "summary": "My girlfriend's mom is sick, and I'm not good at talking or being supportive in these situations. Could you give me some advice? Thanks"}
{"id": "t3_rhyy3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "SO proposed, I said yes. But I've been hiding my past from him - how do I come clean?", "post": "I'm 27(f) and he is 25(m). We've been together for 3 years and everything is going great. He is a lovely guy and my heart still flutters when I see him, as corny as that may sound <3.\n\nLast night he proposed to me. I was happier than I've ever been in my life until the realization set in; I have to tell him about my past.\n\nI've done some things that I am not proud of and I've lied about them. I was a total whore; from age 16 to 21 I would sleep with any asshole that hit on me. I was a stripper from age 18 to 21 as well and had an off-and-on-again drug and alcohol habit during that time. At some points I took enough to kill a small army... I'm not sure how it's going to effect my future health, but nothing major so far.\n\nHow do I tell him? I've wanted to, but it's all so confusing. That's not something to admit until I'm in a serious relationship, but by that point I felt like I was already hiding it, so I continued to hide it. I've lied to him about my number of sexual partners, work history, why I dropped out of highschool, etc. I'm not the same person any more and I don't want him to think of me as just some slut or drug addict (I haven't taken anything or even drank alcohol since I was 21).", "summary": "I have a really bad past and I've been lying to my SO about it. How do I tell him without scaring him away or making him think I'm a slut?"}
{"id": "t3_2sluar", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I need help. Bad.", "post": "So here's my situtation: I met this girl over a year ago and we started going out, since then most of her friends have never been a bother. However, in the last 5 or so months this group of boys that are her best friends have been complete assholes to the both of us, and are completely 100% against everything that we do in relation to anything sexual. Recently we decided to go to third base, she made me promise not to tell anyone because her school would never let her hear the end of it, and she goes and tells the worst possible person to tell, one of those boys. He flips his shit and goes all depression-make-her-feel-bad mode and completely turns her world upside down. Keep in mind, the whole lot of us have depression and my girlfriend and I are absolutely head over heels for each other and we're generally really happy when we're together. She's really really upset because of some of the things that he said and I'm not sure what to do. She doesn't want to talk to me for fear that I'll get upset which probably is the best way to upset me, and she also doesn't want to talk to her friend because, and i quote; \"I don't want to talk to him because he's going to keep doing this until we break up or i kill myself and neither are good for you.\" \n\nOne of the major problems is that she doesn't think about what's best for herself, and she only thinks about me. Now that kind of attention to some would be fairly flattering, but I don't do well with attention and she's giving me half of her attention as well as the other half to her friends.\n\nWhat can I do?", "summary": "my girlfriend is upset because her friends are assholes and say horrible things to her because they're jealous of what we have and they do not. (I forgot to mention they're all \"in love\" with her.)"}
{"id": "t3_2afswj", "subreddit": "jobs", "title": "Is it ever acceptable to be honest in a cover letter?", "post": "I want to say something like, \"I never realized what I wanted to do until blah blah...\" or \"though these jobs taught me a lot, I know now that I want to work in this field because so forth.\" \n\nPhrases like this break the rule about being super-duper positive whenever you apply to something. Then again, there's that rule about being genuine when you write a cover letter to, you know, \"stand-out.\" It's kind of impossible for me to be both.\n\nI am 25, a college grad, and trying to scrape together a cover letter that reflects what I want to do even though I do not have direct experience in that field (or a lot of work experience at all - I am focusing on entry level jobs). Advice out there seems oxymoronic. What are the boundaries when it comes to being honest in a cover letter?", "summary": "Imperfect past (i.e. not a criminal history ... just lukewarm qualifications and lack of a plan). How honest is too honest when writing a cover letter?"}
{"id": "t3_2qonuq", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [17M] want to meet a cute worker [19F] at my local grocery store. How do I do it?", "post": "Hey /r/relationships, I'd first like to say that this is my first post and I see lots of great advice in this sub and so I wanted to say thank you!\n\nSo I've been going to my local grocery store for a while now (Albertsons) and there's a super cute girl who works there. I've never really talked to her and I know nothing about her, but I'd really like to try talking to her somehow and see how things go.\n\nI wanted to perhaps bring her a coffee one day but I fear that's a little too weird or awkward to just do out of the blue. I don't really know how I can go about approaching her, or what I would say. I'm really nervous to meet her but I really want to.\n\nWhat is the easiest, or perhaps just most smooth way of going about trying to meet her and maybe flirt a little bit? Somehow ending up with her phone number would be the best outcome :)\n\nAgain, thank you so much for the advice!", "summary": "There's a cute girl at my local grocery store that I really want to meet and try flirting with, but I'm not sure how to approach her. What's the best way of doing this?"}
{"id": "t3_h51dq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Student in my class incited for a drawing?", "post": "A student in my careers class today drew a 2D war scene with stick figures. All stick figures with little rocket launchers, etc. The student had drawn it after the lesson during a sort of free bit of time. The teacher confiscated the drawing, sent it to the administration and cited that he had violated the safe schools act of Ontario.\n\nIs this true? What will happen? I feel this is a bunch of crap, especially since earlier in the class, he was joking with a friend, to which the friend responded that he would punch him. The teacher turned and said that she \"Wishes (he) could punch (the student) because it would be nice and (the student) deserves it, but there is a safe schools act in place that permits it\"\n\nThe very act he is being accused of violating was basically tossed out the window there! The teacher incited violence against him! What can happen to the teacher and the student? What can he do so he is not wrongfully accused. The police may possibly be involved, to which I've already informed him not to speak to, as to not place guilt on himself.", "summary": "STUDENT IN MY CLASS IS POSSIBLY BEING INVESTIGATED BY THE POLICE AND SUSPENDED FOR DRAWING A WAR SCENE WITH STICK FIGURES"}
{"id": "t3_1kc5a1", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[23/M]Women I talk to never seem interested in me yet they gave me their numbers. So confused.", "post": "Every girl I talk to and try to go out with just doesn't seem to be interested in me. I talk to them. Get their number. Feel as though they want to go out, and then when I try to set up a date, they seem to always be busy or ignore texts. I don't text back for days and NOTHING so I just say \"whelp...\" and let it go. This has happened with about 2 or 3 women so far. It's very frustrating. I have no idea what I'm doing or saying wrong. It's getting to the point where I'm getting depressed over women not being interested in me. Feel as though I have a personality disorder or something.\n\nI work out, groom myself, and I'm sure my looks have nothing to do with it anyway. It would be nice to have an outside opinion without going to my friends about it.", "summary": "Can get girls number but they never seem to want to go on a date or ignore me. What's the deal?"}
{"id": "t3_2eqmlc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My boyfriend (20) who I've been with for 2 years now has never posted pictures of us or me and never tags me or talks about me on social media.. Should I be concerned?", "post": "My boyfriend and I are both 20 years old and we live together. For a while we were long distance up until May of this year. He's never posted a single thing about me or us on social media. No pictures, no statuses, and if we go out and do something fun or cool it's always somewhere along the lines of \"can't wait for the concert tonight\" and that's it. No tagging, no recognition, nothing. I know this sounds like such a first world problem but like idk it's just weird. I was the one that had to initiate making our relationship fbook official too, after waiting a few months to see if he would. Idk reddit, maybe I'm being ridiculous, but should I be concerned? And how would I bring this up to him without sounding stupid?", "summary": "my boyfriend of two years never has tagged me or posted anything (including pictures or statuses) about us on social media."}
{"id": "t3_pgoaa", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "It's almost Valentine's Day; I'm tired of writing the same boring message on a card when sending flowers, what are some of the more clever things you've seen/written?", "post": "Yesterday was the \"we're officially together\" anniversary of my fianc\u00e9e and I, but I'm traveling for business out of state and couldn't be there. I had a shitty morning and didn't get the order for her flowers in on time, had to have them sent to our house instead of to her work since she'd be out of the office by the time they were to be delivered, and had to use an unknown florist. I thought everything was going to be fine, she'd see them when she got home after thinking I had forgot and be completely surprised. Good hell was I wrong. She thought I sent them AFTER she yelled at me for not sending her flowers, I sent them to the house and not her office (big mistake, the only thing that matters is showing them off- like dick-waving for women), and they looked like shit.\n\nSO, I am (trying to) make up for this on Valentine's, but I will still be out of town. I've got the florist set and the arrangement picked out, but need a good message in the card. But I don't want anything boring or conventional.. I also want a bit of humor. But I'm having a hard time coming up with something that doesn't make me sound like an ass (such is my nature sometimes).", "summary": "Share your witty/comical/best flower card message(s) for all to see (read: use in the future)!"}
{"id": "t3_g23ae", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I just got offered a four month internship in D.C. I've never been to D.C. What do I do?", "post": "I grew up pretty poor - not sheltered - but poor. I didn't step on a plane until I was 21 and I have never seen the ocean. I was in Chicago for two days when I was 21.  And I have driven through Phoenix - those are the only big, populated cities i have even touched on.  I don't know anyone in D.C. nor do I understand the parts of the...city?  the...District?  I have had several people give me advice, and have talked with several people renting rooms.  Some people say it's better do deal with an hour commute both ways and live somewhere like Silver Spring - while others tell me, \"In terms of neighborhoods, stick to Dupont Circle, Capitol Hill, Adams Morgan, Mount Pleasant, Columbia Heights. And try to be near a metro station (very important!!).\" And yet others tell me these are dangerous areas to live.\n\nAlso, they want me to start, on a Monday morning.  I graduate Saturday, 1200 miles away.\n\nI am excited, and scared, and I will miss my cat, and my best friend and my apartment.  Should I move to D.C.?  Am I going to get lost?  Am I going to get mugged?  What is the worst thing about D.C?", "summary": "I am headed to DC for four months after my graduation and I don't know where to live, or how to DO IT."}
{"id": "t3_w6178", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Reddit, what are your douchebag cop stories, false accusations, and so on!", "post": "So there i was, in the car with my friend while he was doing a doughnut around a blacked out lightpole, in an abandoned mall bothering nobody. He finished and we are about to leave. He steps out and i get in the driver seat and as i was leaving my car stalls. He comes out turns his light on and says \"what the fuck are you doing you little dipshit, then proceeds to keep cursing, saying he say me doing doughnuts and calling me names and kept on insisting on seeing me do something he couldnt have possibly seen. I was in the car, tires fresh with burned rubber smell, one of those wrong place in the wrong time moments. He asked for my registration and still caling me names, so i politely said \"sir i do not appreciated the name calling, can you please stop. Nope, he responds by slamming me on my car and handcuffing me saying \"hows my fucking voice now, and called me something along the lines of faggot or cunt. I forgot, i was to in shock that he was treating me like this when i was nothing but courteous and polite! even the other cop that showed up had a look on her face like wtf? i get put into his buddies car and he continues to go on and belittle me. So he ends me giving me three tickets, which im fighting, and im going to complain, my friends heard and saw it all (friend is a cop, told me the guy was out of line). All in all i could see if i had done something wrong, but even after trying to calmly talk to the guy, he was to busy being a jackass. oh, and i overheard him saying \"this is what happens when i have no action except for stupid shit like this\"", "summary": "douchebag cop was bored and treated me like complete shit for assuming i was doing something i wasn't. arrested, and made fun of. Friends hear and saw it all"}
{"id": "t3_32tavc", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me 27F with my BF 29M of 7 months, I think he may like to occasionally cross dress, how can I ask him?", "post": "So basically as the title says, my BF has dropped a few comments such as \"we could wear matching maid outfits\" ( for cosplay), wanted to wear a girls Oktoberfest outfit etc. I'm wondering if perhaps he does like to cross dress but I'm not sure as he's never said so outright and I'm shocking at taking a hint. >.<\n\nI want him to feel comfortable and happy and would like to potentially investigate that sort of thing if he wants to. Ultimately, I just want to make sure he's happy. \n\nSo! Essentially I have three questions; \n- Should I ask him? \n- If do, what would be the best way to do so without making him uncomfortable?\n- Is there anything else I should keep in mind, do or read that could help me understand better so I can be there for him?", "summary": "how do I ask my bf if he enjoys cross dressing and make sure he knows that I don't mind whatsoever?"}
{"id": "t3_3328gr", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Bf [26m] stills keeps in touch with his ex's family...", "post": "Bf and I [both 26yo] been together over a year and half now. I don't like the fact that he still keeps in touch with his ex's family [mainly her parents and her brothers & sister].\nHe knows how strongly I feel about this and how much it bothers me, yet he still keeps in touch with them. I believe when you break up with someone, it should be a clean, no contact whatsoever break, and that includes family too. I'm not in contact with any of my exes or their family, out of respect for my significant other, but I don't get why my bf doesn't understand this, and he knows that it bothers me.\nWhat to do?", "summary": "I absolutely don't like that my bf talks to his ex's family. He knows it bothers me, yet keeps doing it..."}
{"id": "t3_2m3iti", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by whining about a cancer patient. Repeatedly", "post": "TIFU in a small, day ruining way. \nMy first FU was about three months ago. A beat-up, rusty van parked in my apartment parking lot hadn't moved in weeks if not months. The license plate was expired as of December 2012 so I took a picture and emailed my landlord. I thought perhaps someone had abandoned it (looking back, they probably wouldn't have left the license plate on it, but whatever). She said the van belongs to my neighbor who is undergoing chemotherapy. That's why the van hadn't moved in forever. Apparently the 2014 license renewal sticker had simply fallen off. I felt like a big jerk for tattling on someone who is ill. Within the next week the van had moved parking spots twice so I felt guilty that this poor sick woman might be moving her van just because I had complained. I've seen my neighbor since and she's always been friendly to me. However she referred to herself as \"a big pain in the butt\" so I was a little worried my landlord had told her who had reported her van.\nToday's FU began when I was coming up the stairs from the basement, having put laundry into the washer. I ran into this neighbor and we began chitchatting. I mentioned that I had just had to completely clean out one of the washers because some terribly rude person washed a bunch of Kleenexes and left the washer completely disgusting. I practically had to climb into it to pull some of the tissue out of the drum. Shortly after this the conversation ended and I went back to my apartment. 30 minutes later when I went to move my clothes to the dryer the same neighbor was taking hers out of the dryer. She must've had the Kleenex in her laundry. Now I feel horrible for having complained right at her. Even if she wasn't sick I would have felt bad calling her a rude jerk right to her face, but she is on oxygen and everything and probably wasn't able to clean the washer out herself. I'd like to apologize to her but I'm not sure whether that would make it more awkward.", "summary": "I accidentally moaned about my cancer ridden neighbor to my landlord and felt bad. I accidentally moaned about my cancers ridden neighbor to her face and felt worse."}
{"id": "t3_4lv585", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by trying to climb a tree", "post": "So I had just bought a brand new drone to fly around and do drone stuff with and I had been practicing in my house to get the hang of it. My kid says that I should fly it outside and I agree that it's time. So we go outside and I get it started and I was flying low because it was windy(probably not the best time to fly it). My kid says fly it higher and in my head I said, \"Fuck it, why not.\" So I did and the wind pushed it away from us and for some reason I stopped making it ascend and tried to let it fall to the ground or close enough so that I could turn it back on but there was a tree that decided to catch it for me. It's a pretty big tree too, like at least 30-40 feet tall, and while my kid is screaming that I did a good job, I'm screaming in my head because it's either I go get it out the tree or I'm just SOL of $110. After about 10 minutes of ranting, I decided to climb the tree and I have never climbed a tree before but I wasn't gonna that stop me because I wasn't about to let that money go to waste. After about another 15 minutes of standing on a trash can(first branch was too high to grab) I managed to get to first branch and was ready to start my adventure to get the drone. Then I realized that I had never climbed a tree before let alone a tree of this tall and start running scenarios in my head about how I'm gonna die if i fuck up and  regret my decision and now I can't get down from the one branch I was currently standing on. Luckily my neighbor came by and saw me in distress and not only helped me out the tree, but decided to climb the tree to get the drone down for me. Now we play Smash Bros at his house on the weekends and I'm not out $110.", "summary": "Bought a drone and got it stuck in a tree. Tried to climb said tree and got stuck with it. Neighbor saved us both."}
{"id": "t3_prscq", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have you ever left a significant other to pursue your dreams? Or did you give up your dreams to stay with your SO? How'd that work out for you?", "post": "Reddit. I could use your advice. Ever feel like you met the perfect person for you at the most imperfect part of your life? I'm about to graduate college and what that means to me is I can finally escape my shitty hometown and move to the other side of the country. My dream city.\n\nProblem is 2 years ago I met an amazing woman and fell in love with her. She says she loves me but she's not willing to make the 3000 mile move to a place where neither of us have friends or family or support of any kind.\n\nI feel like now that college is over if I stay here much longer I'm going to start planting my feet here. Then I'll be kicking myself forever for not following my dreams.\n\nBut what if this girl is the best it gets for me? What if I make no friends in the new city. What if I threw everything away for one giant risk that didn't pay out? \n\nIt feels like no matter what I'm setting myself up for regret.\n\nI figure this isn't an uncommon situation to be in. Perhaps if I hear how it worked out for other people it might make me less nervous about my choice.", "summary": "Should I stay with the girl of my dreams in an area that makes me unhappy? Or should I risk everything and move across country to my dream city?"}
{"id": "t3_f3olv", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "A year later and I'm(M-27) still hung on my ex (F-22). How can I truly get over her?", "post": "So a year ago on the 28th I met the girl of my dreams. Everything was just fantastic, there was great chemistry, attraction, you name it it was there.\n\nFast forward 2 months (yes I know) I get my ass dumped for \"not showing her I was serious\"... at the same time she she we might be moving fast. I was okay with her wanting to slow down. A kiss each night would have been enough, I didn't need sex. She left me and I've been devastated since. She said she needed time... I was waiting.\n\nI wasn't perfect though, I lied. When we first started talking I implied I had relationship and sexual history, I was tired of being laughed at for being a virgin by choice, yes it happened several times. So I let her think I had experience.\n\nI told her about this after she dumped me. It pissed her off so much and basically got to where she said \"I hate myself for letting you in\". Midsummer this was and then 2 weeks later she has a new bf. I guess she just needed time without me in the picture. That's fine, I messed this up and will have to try and live with that.\n\nMy question, how can I really get over her? I fell hard and fast. I've been living in this personal agony since March. I try and forget her, I try to tell myself if she was my one she wouldn't have let her ex's sins become problems I paid for. What should I do? Anything, everything, I just need to hear any advice. Because I can't figure it out myself.", "summary": "Fell in love with a girl I think is my one... she dumped me after some ex issues that I got blamed for... I'm living in agony since April while she's moved on. Help."}
{"id": "t3_45rv7c", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [22/F] boyfriend [27/M] makes offensive jokes that don't sound anything like jokes, and gets upset when I take them seriously.", "post": "We met while I was at the vacation in his country, exchanged contacts and talked online. I've flown over a couple of times, we fell in love, so we're currently 6 months into the relationship and we're long-distance.\n\nThe problem is that he has a weird sense of humor. His understanding of a joke is to say something offensive in a completely serious tone, but others are somehow expected to understand that he's kidding (Poe's law in action, in other words). Needless to say, most people who heard him make those jokes don't understand that he's joking. I've gotten somewhat used to this, so I can recognize when he's serious and when he isn't most of the time, but sometimes he sounds too convincing. For example yesterday he said something sexist to me. It hurt me, but I thought that he probably didn't have any malicious intent and might have just been ignorant when it comes to this issue, so I gently tried to explain what was wrong with what he said. His reaction upset me greatly, so to avoid making a scene and saying things I'll regret, I said goodnight and logged off. I woke up the next day to messages of him apologizing profusely and clearly being very sad about it. Turns out he thought I was joking too so he played along, while to me it looked like he was mocking me for what I was saying. And this is not the first time it has happened. I tried talking to him before about it, but his only reply to this is \"How can you seriously think I'd say those things? Do you really think I'm such a terrible person?\". But what the heck else am I supposed to think when he sounds like he absolutely means it?! Even when I say that what he said upset me, he thinks I'm joking too.\n\nHe's not a bad person, he's actually very kind and sweet, so I understand why it saddens him when I take him seriously. But I also think that he's old enough to understand that not everybody gets his sense of humor and not everybody is kidding all the time, like he does. What should I do, reddit?", "summary": "Boyfriend has a peculiar sense of humor almost nobody understands, makes rude \"jokes\" in a serious tone, and gets really upset when I think he's serious and feel hurt. Not sure how to deal with this."}
{"id": "t3_t2oo2", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How can I make it work with a guy who is addicted to video games?", "post": "I love video games and I love playing them with my boyfriend but I wouldn't call myself a gamer. I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years we are both 23 and I'm convinced that he has a gaming addiction to some degree. It seems like no matter how how much he plays he never gets tired of them. \n\nHe gets home from work and games he wakes up and games his definition of spending time together is either playing something or me watching him play. He's really a good guy otherwise and I love him but i just can't take his constant gaming anymore. \n\nI've tried talking to him about it but he says it's just his hobby. I feel like he loves his games more than me sometimes. He's canceled dates and even makes excuses and lies so that he can play. Ive talked to him about this too but he doesn't think he's doing anything wrong. Does anyone have any tips on how to make a relationship work with a video game addict?", "summary": "My bf is a gaming addict. He breaks dates and lies to play but thinks he's doing nothing wrong. We've been dating for 5 years and are both 23."}
{"id": "t3_2cdlvz", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [19F] being shallow with my SO [23M]?", "post": "I have been dating a guy for a month now who is so sweet to me and treats me like his princess. His personality is basically what I want in a guy and he makes me very happy. However, lately he's revealed how jealous of a person he is, and how he doesn't want me to hang out with any of my male friends. I was offended and brought up trust, but he said he trusts I won't do anything. He thinks I don't understand where he is coming from, but will try not to be jealous.\n\nOn another note... I am in college and trying to make something of my future, with a job and extracurricular activities. I want so much in life. He, on the other hand, is only a high school graduate and I don't see much motivation to get very far in life. This has been bothering me..\n\nShould I end it before we make anything official? Should I wait it out? I don't want to say all this to him and offend him.", "summary": "guy I'm talking to is jealous of my male friends and isn't going very far in life. Do I stay with him?"}
{"id": "t3_33b02b", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by telling my friend about a feminist.", "post": "This was today, but began on Friday.\n\nLast Friday in theology class, a seminarian came to our class to answer any questions we had. Class began and the feminist in question raised her hand and asked why women can't be priests, he began to respond but she cut him off and began lecturing him about how it was sexist, unfair, doltish, and threatened all the rights of women. She continued lecturing him for the next 40 minutes, he didn't get to say a word. Today, in theology class, she began yelling at our teacher about how everything she believed was wrong and how she was a disgrace against humanity. All because the feminist didn't agree with something the teacher has said. Our teacher is young, just out of college, and really really nice, to the point where you can't even get in trouble in her class because she's to nice and timid to say anything. Well anyway, being yelled at pushed her over the edge, because she was already sad because her cat had just died, and she began crying and left the classroom. The feminist just said \"see I was obviously right because she couldn't back up her ideas. Here's the FU. A few classes later I was telling a few of my friends about how she had made our teacher cry, and I suddenly feel a tap on my shoulder, I turn around, and it's her, the feminist I had just been talking about, I had forgotten she was in my class because she had just recently transferred in. Well before I could react when I turned, she smacked me in the face, I had been badly sunburned at a track meet over the weekend so it was the most excruciating pain I had ever felt, like a volcano exploding on my face. Before I could recover she punched me in the nose. My nose broke. Right after punching me she kneed me in the groin. So there I was in fetal position on the ground, my cheek stoning, and the blood from my nose forming a puddle on the ground. She smirked, looked me in the eye and said \" That's what you get for disagreeing with me you uncultured swine.\"\n\nSorry for any formatting issues and grammar, I'm on mobile.", "summary": "Told my friend how a feminist had made my theology teacher cry, got beaten up and called an uncultured swine by said feminist."}
{"id": "t3_1ftkqt", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I (F19) started talking to a new guy m(18) but need a little advice.", "post": "So, I just got out of a long relationship that I knew was failing for a while. I told myself that I wouldn't start seeing anybody anytime soon, but I've met someone that I get along with really really well, and that I like a lot- and I'm not about to throw away an opportunity if I'm not still heartbroken (which I'm honestly not) over my last boyfriend. \n\nMy problem is that I don't know what the intentions of this new guy are. We've only been talking for about a week, and he's in town just for summer and I'm assuming holidays because he goes to a school out of town. He's told me he's a virgin, but he's so gorgeous that it's almost hard for me to believe. My question is as to why, after only a few dates, he's already told me this info. Would it be because he's ready to lose it to someone he's comfortable with, or because he sees a future (whether it be short or long, whatever) between us? I asked him why he hadn't lost it yet, as he's almost 19, and he said that it was because he hasn't really felt that it was the right time with anyone else. \n\nBasically my dilemma is that I really like him, but I'm not sure if he's trying to just use me to lose his virginity to someone that isn't totally random and then go back to school. I know I should talk to him, but I feel like its too soon... And I think he wants to have sex relatively quickly into this. He's already hinted and told me that he wants to. \n\nI just don't want to end up hurt!", "summary": "Trying to find out what the intentions of a new person in my life are, and I don't want to end up hurt."}
{"id": "t3_4mqd62", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [16M] with my girlfriend [15F] of a week, I'm afraid to kiss her because of my severe food allergies.", "post": "Hello, me and this girl, Pepper, have been talking for a few weeks now. As to say, I asked her out. But I still haven't kissed her. It wasn't until last week actually that she knew of my allergies. I thought I had mentioned it sooner. I'm severely allergic to all nuts to the point of life-threatening. I told her that my allergy is severe, but I don't think she realizes that kissing is hard for me. How do I bring it up? I feel like my only options are to say to stop eating food with nuts.\n\nI also know doctor sites are highly criticized (rightfully so!), but according to an allergy site (allergicchild.com), it says a doctor did a research and the protein remains in the saliva for several hours even after brushing and chewing gum, they recommend several nut-free meals and waiting hours for physical contact!\n   \n\nI should also note, my girlfriend hates peanut butter. But that doesn't rule out that many as there's Hershey almond bars, etc,.", "summary": "I [16M] have a life-threatening allergy to nuts, how do I go about kissing with my girlfriend [15F]?"}
{"id": "t3_3k95v1", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by being an extremely dense guy", "post": "As with most stories on here, this happened a couple of days ago (Monday). I went to a large Labor Day party in the town I live in, at the request of some of my friends who were playing music at said party. I was standing in front of the stage, just zoning out and listening to the guys play. \n\nAll of a sudden, I noticed two (lady) arms shooting out around my sides. I ignored it thinking she was trying to dance with someone behind me. She continues to dance and makes her way in front of me. I'm still kinda just zoning out and don't really pay much attention, until her face is about two inches away from mine. She asks me if I'm having a good time and I of course say yes. She then asks why I'm not dancing, and I lie and say I don't know how. I proceed to do a kind of stupid shimmy thing, because why be serious? \n\nShe laughed and said that was how she danced too, and started doing it next to me. I continued to do so for a minute or so, and then stopped. She leaned in again and said something, but I couldn't hear her over the music. Instead of asking her to repeat herself, or moving away from the stage and speakers to talk, I proceeded to just give her a small smile, like she said something funny. She kept dancing next to me for a few songs, gave me a weird look, and left with her friend, who I guess was behind me the entire time. \n\nAbout fifteen minutes later, the band takes a break, and my buddy who was playing came up to me and asked me why I didn't dance with the girl. Evidently from the stage he saw her make a beeline for me from the back of the party. Of course, I had just assumed she knew someone in the band and just wanted to be close to the stage. It took me a few more minutes to realize that she was probably into me, and I completely blew my chance.", "summary": "Went to a party, had a girl come dance up on me, was too dense to realize she was flirting, and blew my chance with one of the cutest girls I had seen in a while."}
{"id": "t3_3vv5t1", "subreddit": "legaladvice", "title": "Changing Rent Concessions After Signing Lease: Maryland Edition", "post": "In short, we signed a lease for our apartment this past Saturday, and got the keys that day. Today, the leasing office called saying they couldn't give us both of the rent concessions that were in our lease.\n\n- concession 1 was 2 months free (next month and last month, on 16-month lease), in total worth $3100\n\n- concession 2 was 5% preferred employer discount on monthly rent, over the life of the lease worth over $1200\n\n- the call this morning involved the leasing specialist saying the manager said they couldn't offer 2 concessions, that they never didn't, and their \"system\" couldn't support input of 2 concessions (and would be questionable in audits), and that I needed to choose only one\n\n- I'm livid, because it feels like a bait & switch, and if I give up the smaller concession I'm losing out on $1200, which was a consideration in signing in the first place; even if it was a mistake, why should I take the hit? \n\n- they're not willing to negotiate on how to make up the $1200 in another way (3 rd or 0.8 of a month free to offset any \"system\" limitations, other than telling me I can buy out the lease ... their stated concern is that's getting into fair housing issues\n\n- conveniently, my copy of the lease doesn't have any of their signatures -- just those of me and my spouse\n\nHow can I fix this tomorrow? We just moved here for work. The movers are bringing our things tomorrow, utilities are being started, and I don't want 16 months of drama or to have to buy out a 16-month lease then try to find a new home while starting my new job.", "summary": "Days after signing a new lease, the concessions I was offered are now  attempting to be changed by property management. I want to resolve without drama or getting shafted."}
{"id": "t3_q1q91", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "This may be none of my business (xpost from /r/relationships)", "post": "My stepdaughter is hanging around with this boy who is quite possibly the lowest form of life on earth. He is the dirtiest, slimiest, most disgusting person I have ever met. He lives in a shitty apartment with three other guys who are all slobs. He doesn't work, doesn't bathe, and quite literally lives in a pile of his own amassed garbage. Nine times out of ten, whenever I see him, he smells like rancid milk due to not bathing/not washing his clothes/not *NOT* wallowing in his own filth. He claims homeless benefits since he technically is only temporarily (permanently) sleeping on the couch of his apartment. He draws food stamps, and unemployment (whenever he does work for as long as an employer can stand him). I helped him to get a job working with children once, and he was almost immediately let go due to \"inappropriate (non-sexual) physical contact with a child\". He is very manipulative. I've caught him going through the text messages on her phone and going through her facebook account as well. I know that he and my step daughter are sexually active to some degree, as I've caught them mid-fingerbang (they were doing it while I was 10 feet away). Yes, unfortunately it is consensual. Is there anything that I can do to scare him off, or put them off of one another?", "summary": "Is there anything I can do to to chase away this scumbag so that he doesn't drag my step daughter down with him? Or is it none of my business, and I'm a nosy asshole?"}
{"id": "t3_1eapda", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My girlfriend (F 21), of 2 months, is distant, but says she wants to be with me (M 29). What do I do?", "post": "So to cut to the chase, when we are apart, I barely ever hear from her and her text messages are very distant and impressionable. When we are together it's passionate and amazing. She says she has commitment issues and its hard for her to flirt or show her feelings. As we spend more time apart than together, this has become a problem for me. I know she wants to be with me, but as soon as I'm out of sight it feels like I no longer exist. She's constantly telling me (in person) that she's so thankful to have me in her life and appreciates me being patient. But most of the time I feel as though I'm dating a brick wall. Every compliment is met with a standard \"Thank you\" and ever suggestion of a date is met with \"maybe\". I've called her out on this several times and she tells me she is truly working on it. I just don't know what to do to help her, or how for me not to feel like I'm dating a brick wall.", "summary": "Distant Girlfriend actually wants to be with me, I'm just not sure how to date someone who is extremely independent. Any advice?"}
{"id": "t3_3trmv1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [M30] am considering breaking up with my girlfriend [F26] of 5 years", "post": "First off, I love this woman. She's loving, beautiful, and smart. \n\nWhen we met, we lived in neighboring towns, but she moved an hour away when she began law school two years ago. Everyone warned me that law school may make her distant, but, surprisingly, she remains devoted to our relationship with frequent phone calls and visits. I am the one having issues with our relationship.\n\nI'm about to take a stab in the dark in attempt to explain what's going on in my head. When she visits, I'm beyond nervous, which combined with my stressful job can put me over the edge. Also, I can be pretty anal retentive about things; when she rearranges my house, as little as putting the milk on the wrong side of the refrigerator, I get annoyed at her. My guess for the reason behind my unhappiness in our relationship is that I'm dealing with some inner turmoil. I'm dealing with some trauma from a few years ago and the relationship may be digging some of the negative emotions up.\n\nMy girlfriend is a great listener and seems willing to make any changes. The thing is, I don't know what changes would make me happy. I can tell her that I need X, Y, and, Z. And because she is awesome, she will give X, Y, and Z, but there's a chance I could still be unsettled. \n\nI've told her that I'm not sure whether I want to continue the relationship. The last thing she said to me was that she is devastated, feels she did something wrong, and just wants to help me through whatever I'm going through. She agreed to give me some space and is probably waiting by her phone. It just kills me that I'm hurting her and I fear that I'm going to continue to hurt her if I were to try and work on our relationship. Yet, I'm afraid to lose her. \n\nBy the way, this is the longest and healthiest relationship I've ever been in. A couple of months ago, I was certain I was spending my life with her. What the heck is going on with me?", "summary": "My girlfriend is wonderful. I have issues. I'm not sure if I should continue our relationship because of my emotional state."}
{"id": "t3_4ud5k0", "subreddit": "dating_advice", "title": "[35/m] When is it okay to ask out a retail employee?", "post": "So. I'm under the distinct impression that it is bad form to ask out someone when they are at work. I've only done this once several years ago when I didn't know better.   \n\nLately I have been noticing this young woman who works at the local convenience store. I find her to be friendly, warm, and incredibly attractive while still not quite being out of my leauge (even though I know that's not supposed to be a thing).  \n\nIn the last month I've been seeing her in there a lot more on my way to work as I've had to go in early. Otherwise it's pretty rare that I see her working there during my regular schedule. We've been making a little chit chat here and there. Sometimes it goes pretty well and I love when I manage to make her laugh.  \n\nMaybe it's stupid and just a little crush that I should get over. A few years ago my cousin started dating a girl he met when she was working at a gas station. They are now happily married. So it must have been okay for him to ask her out at some point.   \n\nWhat do you think? Do I keep building a rapport with her and see if it goes anywhere? Do I try to kick it up a notch? Or do I forget about her altogether and go back to scrolling through online dating sites?", "summary": "Starting to develop some rapport with a local sales clerk. Is it ever going to be acceptable to ask her out, or is she permanently off limits because that's a faux pas?"}
{"id": "t3_1ov8e0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [24M] had sex with my friends' mom [45F], I need to get this off my chest and learn how to deal with it", "post": "Throwaway account.\n\nRecently I went to a birthday party for an older friend. At this party was also a woman who has 3 sons, aged between 20 and 29. I am close friends with all of them. \n\nAnyway, I know she's been having a thing for me since last summer and I've always been attracted to her. We went out for a cigarette and I told her I only came to this party because I knew she was coming as well. Then she kissed me and things escalated from there.\n\nWe went to her place and had sex. Afterwards I went back to the party and she stayed at her home. The first one I see is her oldest son, who was also there. He stopped me and wanted to make small talk while smoking a cigarette. It felt really awkward, knowing what I just had done with his mother.\n\nBut to get to the point, I feel really scared now. I am afraid they will find out and that would be a disaster. We live in a small town so it would be terrible, not only for me (they will beat me up like never before), but it would of course be very embarrassing for them as well.\n\nI have to live with this secret for the rest of my life, and I will be reminded of it every time I see her sons, which is often. I don't know what to do.\n\nPlease, help me figure out the best way to deal with this because I feel really lost.", "summary": "Had sex with the mother of 3 close friends, I need help to deal with this. They will kill me if they find out."}
{"id": "t3_3xihr0", "subreddit": "tifu", "title": "TIFU by telling my 3 year old niece the secret identity of Superman", "post": "I love comic books. I enjoy posting about them on Reddit and i have a budding collection. When my niece comes to my house, she loves to look through my books, but [there is one in particular] she likes to take off the shelf because she can ask me who each character is when she's looking through it.\n\nAnyway, last week it blew her mind when i told her that these characters have normal names and begun teaching her them. In particular, she wanted to know who Batman, Superman, Green Lantern and Wonder Woman really were, so i told her.\n\nFast forward to yesterday, it's the last day of her nursery before the holidays so her mother (my sister) goes to pick her up. The teacher at the nursery told her that there had been a tiny incident and she just wanted her to know.\n\nIn front of say 20 children and 3 adults at the nursery, she told everyone that Superman's real name was *Clark Cunt*.\n\nThe adults tried not to laugh at her mistake and explained it was actually Kent, but my niece was adamant and said \"My uncle told me it was Clark Cunt\". My sister found the funny side to it, could have been worse i guess, it could have been the Winter Soldier instead.", "summary": "told 3 year old niece that Superman's name is Clark Kent, she misheard and called him Clark Cunt at nursery."}
{"id": "t3_15m2sg", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Have you ever written off an entire group of friends because of the actions of one of them? If so, what did they do?", "post": "I'm at work right now when I'd rather be at my friends' white elephant party. It's not because I have to work, but because I have to avoid one person that managed to enrage me so much that I had to cut her completely out of my life.\n\nThe backstory: I started subletting her room a year ago. We had a long, strange history before that I'd rather not get into, but I figured it would work out. It was a tough leap for me financially and had to work more, but it was close to the school that I wanted to go to, and that alone was worth it. Within a month of me moving in, she started shit talking me to all my friends with the obvious goal of ostracising me. Word got back to me. I completely stopped interacting with her. By June, she managed to kick me out. That made it infeasible for me to continue attending the school, and served to completely waste all the time and energy I spent (not to mention money) making myself at home there. I broke down the glass shop and bike shop I had set up, put most of my things in storage, and had to spend a month renovating a room at my folks' place.\nThe very thought of her enrages me. But even beyond that, she has demonstrated a determination to make me miserable. I resolved to never speak to her or even see her again, to neutralize this potential as much as possible. This has ultimately resulted in not being able to see the majority of my friends. From a group of easily over fifty people whose company I regularly enjoyed, I'm left with a meager handful, and of those, only one that regularly visits. In the past 6 months, I've missed a wedding, thanksgiving, christmas, and numerous other get togethers of people who I've considered family for the past 8 years.\n\nSo who's ruined a good thing for you?", "summary": "'friend' tried to ostracise me and basically succeeded. missed out on lots of cool stuff, miss my friends, but can't do much about it except work."}
{"id": "t3_4idjwd", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Am I [25M] receiving emotional abuse from my [23F] long term gf.", "post": "So let me start off with I love my girlfriend very much and she loves me, she is normally super sweet and tries to do anything she can for me.\n\nSo this coming week we are both about to get swamped with work and with our schedules we aren't going to have much time together. Now where my concerns started to rose was over the weekend Sunday was going to be our last day we both had off for a while. So she wanted to spend it together.\n\nI was down for that but also wanted to have my bud over for bit to have a drink or two for a couple hours I hadn't seen him in a while and he was in town for a couple days. At first she wasn't happy but said sure. So he comes over and we start chatting and talk about highschool and this is my bad we exclude my gf a bit. This really upsets her and she gets upset with me.\n\n So now for the part that concerns me now we fight quite a bit but I think that's just who we are but this time she told me she wanted to break up. Now this hurt but what hurt me was she later told me she only said that to try and hurt me now I had never thought about it but this wasn't the first time she's said she said something hurtful or harsh then admitted to having said it only to try and hurt me, it's happened a lot.\n\nNow this feels worse then saying them because you feel that way, does that qualify as emotional abuse? Or am I just  being a bit over sensitive.", "summary": "Caused a fight with gf, she said something hurtful, then admitted to saying it only to hurt me. I realize she has done that a lot."}
{"id": "t3_2y3ahb", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [21/F], would it be wrong of me to squirrel money away from my future husband?", "post": "Just to be clear,  I'm not getting married anytime soon but after reading and hearing about women in abusive relationships I've started toying with the idea of keeping a little nest egg in case anything bad were to happen should I need to get out of an abusive relationship. As a logical woman I know that sometimes you make bad decisions by marrying the wrong person. And I don't want to be put in a position in the future where I'll be stuck without any options. So every year because I'm native American I, along with the rest of my tribe receive two checks, one for $500, the other for $1,000. This money comes from the combined earnings the tribe receives from multiple business's owned on tribal land. Ergo, the money trickles down to the tribal members. Now the women in my family aren't necessarily forward about getting this money and I've heard that the men they date aren't happy when they find out about the extra \"income\". My problem comes into play here, I plan on getting married one day but I'm not sure how to handle telling my husband. On one hand I'd like it for myself to get out of a bad relationship, on the other, I think it's a nice extra amount of money to invest in towards yearly vacations with my future spouse, new furniture, or things around the house. Should I tell my future husband about the money or be dishonest and never say anything?", "summary": "Hypothetically speaking, would it be wrong to keep a secret stash of money away from my future husband in case of an emergency?"}
{"id": "t3_4qdej3", "subreddit": "AskDocs", "title": "Vertebral X-Rays - Second Opinion", "post": "First off, I am a 24 year old male in good health: 5'11\" 165 lbs.  I have never had any kind of surgery.\n\nAbout a month ago I played my first full contact sport in my life and got knocked around quite a bit.  I experienced soreness in my lower back, but at times there would be a sharp pain from a very specific location on my lower/middle back.  About a month went by and nothing had changed.  I feel the pain when flexing/extending my back, or when working out (squats, deadlifts, bent over rows).  Since I first noticed the pain I lightened the frequency and lightened the weight of those specific lifts and just this week had some x-rays taken: \n\nBack-Front View: \nLeft-Right View: \n\nI was told there was a misalignment in L2, and disc degeneration between L4-L5 with small red arrows pointing to bone spurs.  I have looked this up online but have not come across anything that is overly conclusive as to whether or not this is the case.  I am merely looking for some reinforcement, or other thoughts as to the condition of my back.\n\nLike I said, this is completely new to me, so I am skeptical as to whether or not this is something I need professional treatment for, or if this is something I can treat on my own.", "summary": "I hurt my back 1 month ago and these are the x-rays.  I was told L2 is misaligned and there is disc degeneration between L4-L5.  Second opinions?  "}
{"id": "t3_ofwi6", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "How can I get back at/report a credit card scammer?", "post": "I get a call nearly every week from the phone number  1 (720) 539-6698. I think the number is a credit card scam. The automated message says it is cardholder services and that it can lower the interest rate on your credit card. I pressed 1 to \"speak to an agent.\" When the person picked up I asked what company he worked for and why they continued to call me when I'm on the National Do Not Call Registry, and he hung up. I called back and it went straight to voicemail saying \"The mailbox belonging to Mike(?) is full.\" I'm damn near positive they are more than annoying telemarketers, they are attempting to steal people's financial information. \n\nI already filed a complaint with the [National Do Not Call Registry] but I have a lack of faith in their ability to do anything about the fact that this scumbag is trying to rip people off. It seems like they're more worried about telemarketers than anything. I wouldn't be as up in arms about this if it was just stupid telemarketers,  but I'm pissed that there's probably poor people out there getting ripped off. This asshole has been calling for months, but I just hang up. Today I've had it. \n\nWhat else can I do to make sure this scumbag sees justice?", "summary": "I keep getting calls from a credit card scammer. What can I do to see that he gets justice, aside from reporting him to the National Do Not Call Registry (which I've already done)?"}
{"id": "t3_3hwfq3", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "How should I (21f) proceed with guy (21m) I like", "post": "First time posting and I'm writing on mobile so I apologize in advance for any mistakes. \n\nWe've been talking on and off all summer. We both will be going back to school soon. (We are about 3 hours away from each other at school) Our conversations are very casual. The closest thing to flirting we use is maybe a \"(;\". \n\nThe first time we talked on the phone/face timed we talked for over 3 hours. Talking to him comes so naturally. I am really at ease and comfortable with him. We just recently last week went on our first date. We went to dinner then hung out. I had a lot of fun. I felt like I was hanging with a great friend...and that's the problem. \n\nI like him, I think he's cute, but I don't feel the kind of attraction where I want to be involved romantically. There's no spark. I don't think about kissing him and I feel pretty neutral on the idea of kissing him. I think he likes me to the point of wanting to date. \n\nHow do I explain to him that yes I love talking and hanging out and I do think you're cute but I don't want to involved romantically right now? This has happened before to me and a few months later I actually started liking the guy romantically. So who knows maybe in the future I will feel different.   He's such a nice guy I really want to let him down easy. \n\nI don't know if I should just say hey right now I am not interested in anything serious but that doesn't mean we can't still talk and hang because maybe down the line I will feel differently or if I should be blunt and say I like you but just as a friend and that maybe the best course of action is to not talk as much. I don't want to give him false hope and I'm worried that by saying \"maybe\" in the future my feelings will change will do just that. I'm worried that if we just stay on the same path, talking the same amount, etc...that he is just going to be \"waiting\" for my feelings to come around. I'm worried they never will and then he will feel basically lead on. Any advice would be appreciated.", "summary": "Been talking on/off with a guy all summer but recently began talking more consistently. I like him but I don't feel any spark. Both going back to college soon. I don't know how to proceed."}
{"id": "t3_10wndi", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "[21 F] Having trouble with expectations/pressures of sex with boyfriend [23 M].", "post": "We've been together around 5 months.  Due to both our work schedules, we can only see each other around 2-3 days a week at most, and I feel like sex is an *expectation* because of this -- as in, every time we get together in those 2-3 days we HAVE to end up back at either of our apartments at the end of the night having sex.  If we don't have sex (I'm not in the mood, I just want to have a relaxing evening, etc.), he blames himself and thinks it's his fault or that I'm not attracted to him. \n\nSex is really mentally and physically exhausting for me and is usually painful (which yes, I've talked to my doctor and him about this, and I'm slowly but surely making it less painful).  It's not him, but my own problems.  \n\nI've had some sexual abuse in my past and this is the first sexual relationship I've had since (or ever), so I'm trying to work through my own problems, including being touched too much or doing sexual acts that might trigger me (but that I want to do).  Since my only sexual experience was abuse, I feel like I have trouble distinguishing between what is okay in a sexual relationship and what isn't.\n\nThe pressure to *always* have sex when I'm with him, though, is kind of a turn-off?  It makes me anxious and nervous and freaked out.  And then I'll say I'm not in the mood, and he gets sad or upset because of it.  We've tried the route of \"you initiate\", but I still feel like I need to initiate every time or he'll be disappointed or feel bad because I don't.\n\nAm I overworrying about this?  I'm not sure if it's just me being weird or if he's being too pushy about sex.  Do I just have a lower libido than him?  Or is this how normal relationships function?", "summary": "Pressure to have sex with bf all the time is killing my mood most of the time and makes me anxious.  What do?"}
{"id": "t3_1j2gkk", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Best friend's [f/27] boyfriend [m/26] already has a girlfriend [f/~25] and a three year old daughter", "post": "My best friend (we'll call her Sarah) startet a new job in may last year. She was with her then boyfriend for four years by then but things were not going that great. She startet to get along with a collegue (we'll call him Bob) really well. After a few weeks, she admitted that she has fallen for Bob and broke off with her then boyfriend to be with him (Bob). And now here start the problems. \n\nBob already has a girlfriend (Jen) and they have a three year old and live together. He says that the relationship is basically over and he has no feelings for Jen and he loves Sarah and wants to be with her. But he is afraid to leave Jen because she is mentally unstable and clingy and has no job and he is afraid he will lose his daughter and Jen won't be able to care for her and he doesn't know how to care for his daughter alone (though I'm sure Sarah would be more than happy to help) and yeah ... \n\nBob and Sarah are in a relationship for ~ 9 months now, and Sarah gets more and more frustrated. I keep telling her to push Bob for doing the right thing but she never does and it hurts me to see her like that. She would never leave him and I'm starting to believe that he will never leave Jen. Somedays I think I just tell Jen (I have no contact with her or even know her, besides her name and facebook profile) because Bob and Sarah are both unable to do anything, but I don't want to be responsible for ruining Jen's life. \n\n**I know it is highly immoral what they do and in no way do I approve it** (I've been cheated on before and I know the pain) but Sarah has been there for me in more ways than I could have hoped for and I want to give it back now. But I don't know what to do. Please help me?\n\nSorry for any mistakes, my english is not that good", "summary": "Best friend falls for guy, they get together but he already has a girlfriend and a daughter. She (the mom) doesn't know and nobody does anything to change/improve the situation"}
{"id": "t3_i5r0o", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "what moment in your life did you realize that everything you thought you knew about someone or something was a lie?", "post": "me and my best friend had known these 2 girls for a while, by the names of Stacie and Lauren. they were nothing more than friends, they just liked to come hang out with us when we went out at night sometimes. I believed they were great people. If you had asked me about them 2 nights ago, I wouldve had nothing but good things to say about them. Well, me and my friend went and picked them up one night. I knew they had been in the hospital the day before and had some medications they had to take, which was fine. But Stacie started acting weird, and i noticed she was taking ALOT of medication. But i didnt say anything. then she got really quiet and accidently spilled her purse. and about 20 or 30 different pill bottles fell out. everything from Oxycodone to methamphetamine was in these bottles. only half were marked in actual labels, the rest in sharpie. then I notice my best friend get real quiet, and pulled into a church parking lot and got out and walked away. I went to chase him down and he told me to go back and tell Stacie and Lauren that he didnt wasnt to hear a single word out of them on the way back home. so we went back to the car and drove them home and we left. come the next day, me and my cousin go and pick Stacie and Lauren up, because my friend was so pissed he didnt want to see Stacie, and I wanted to see what the fuck was up with the pills and shit. my cousin thought he didnt know Stacie, but as soon as she walked out to the car, he sped off after taking one look at her and said if i ever hung out with her again, he beat the hell out of me. Apparently, Stacie gave what my cousins friend thought was some tylenol for a headache, and it turned out to be some unidentified drug that almost killed him.", "summary": "after months of hanging out with what I thought were very good friends, I realized I was hanging out with an attempted murderer and substance abuser."}
{"id": "t3_1uu6q3", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "I'm [21/m] looking for advice on getting rid of unneeded jealousy.", "post": "Hello. So my four-month (and going!) relationship with my girlfriend [20/f] is going pretty well, although there is one thing that's absolutely killing me. That is jealousy, which I am sure is a prime topic in this subreddit. It was never really a problem until my partner began to talk more with a male friend that she admitted to liking before we started seeing one another. I have met this friend in particular and he's a nice guy, and she's still friends with him, but I can't stop myself from feeling constant jealousy.\n\nI have read many articles detailing how to control and vanquish jealousy, but I still feel myself compelled to be wary of when she is with or talking to other guys. I try really hard to look at every person she talks to as people--not girls, not guys--just to give myself a boost of confidence knowing that they all don't mean what I mean to her. Yet I still can't lose grip of the jealous feelings I have! I truly have no reason to feel that way, as she has been incredibly loyal and helpful in trying to get me to understand that she wants no else but me, that I'm her best friend, etc. I have told her about how I feel and it has resulted in some pretty deep conversations about it, but only to help me. I was cheated on in my last relationship but I don't think that is affecting me in any way, as it wasn't too severe. However, I still unable to push myself over this jealousy. I want her to have friends of both genders because I know at the end of the day, it will be me and her sharing a bed, cuddling, talking about our problems, and all of the other stuff that two partners, couples, best friends do. But knowing that just doesn't seem to give me any satisfaction toward fighting off the jealousy. I mean, maybe it will all come in time, but I would like to hear what some of you have in advice to get a hold of myself a little better and mature so that I can be more confident in me, in her, and in us.", "summary": "I am jealous of my girlfriend spending time or talking to other males. She understands I am, and is trying to help me, and I understand I am, but I can't seem to break free from it regardless."}
{"id": "t3_2o03l0", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "I [19F] think my neighbours [M/F late 30s] are a danger to their children and my family.", "post": "So my neighbours Calle & Mark (late 30s) have 2 kids, Christina (7F) & Alex (5M) and a 1 y/o dog. On the other side of the house there's my parents, Derek [60M] & April [51F], and me, forgotmyfuckingname [19F]. My room mirrors Christina's so not only can I hear everything, during the summer when we have the windows open, you can hear everything that goes on in both sides of the house.\n\nTonight, I'm in my room on Netflix, when I hear a thud and yelling. Even without trying to listen, I can hear Mark yelling at his daughter. But it's more than just yelling. I can hear shit getting thrown & knocked down, Mark's yelling at Christina, telling her she's a worthless bastard, and something about a shit, and I think that I could hear him hit her.\n\nThis isn't an isolated incident either. \n\nI her them lock a kid and/or the dog in Christina's room, I hear them throw shit, yelling at each other and the kids. I've watched Alex run BLOCKS away while Calle was too busy scolding the dog. They've had the dog for a year, and haven't trained him, but yell at the dog for not behaving.\n\nThey let their crazy hang out too. They've yelled at my parents over little shit like TALKING to loud in the drive way, and Calle has ripped my mom a new asshole for **letting** me have musical instruments (friendly reminder that I'm a grown ass woman). \n\nCalle and Mark have yelled at me not only in front of my friends, but they've yelled AT my friends for coming over. Calle yelled at one of my friends for bringing alcohol into the house. HE'S 20, HE'S ALLOWED TO BRING ALCOHOL INTO MY HOUSE.\n\nThis is just some of the shit they've pulled. God, what do I do.", "summary": "Neighbours are cray-cray, I fear for their children & dog, as well as my parents and my own well being. "}
{"id": "t3_495pio", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "My [15F] friends [14-16F] and parents [43M, 40F] constantly diss me for my looks", "post": "So, sorry if this sounds kind of superficial but it really bothers me at the moment. Changed some names as well for privacy reasons.\n\nI'm a fairly average 15 year old in terms of looks, awkwardly shaped, a few spots here and there, features are a little off, whatever. My friends, on the other hand, are legitimately gorgeous, long hair, even skin tone, nice bodies etc. My parents and brother are also quite good looking themselves (for context, my father is Indian, my mother is Irish/Spanish). Which is great, I'm happy for them and that's not what bothers me.\n\nWhat bothers is me is that they take every chance that they get to bring me down when it comes to my appearance. On Valentine's day, my friend, Anna, was bitching about how no one in our group received a rose and the gist of what she said was basically, \"I mean, Kylie's face is gorgeous, Olivia has a hot body, I can be a solid 7 if I tried. But I guess with you, I can understand.\" \n\nAnna also bitched about the fact that I have been asked out by guys a few times, while she has not, \"I mean, you're not even attractive, lets be real.\"\n\nThat hurts like hell, but they're teens, I can understand. But my parents are like that as well.\n\nI'm quite self conscious about my weight and proportions and my parents are very aware of that. I am quite underweight at <50kg and 168 cm. But my parents take every opportunity they can to prod at my stomach, make comments like, \"Oh, you're gaining weight.\" etc. These comments have actually driven me to a mild eating disorder which I hate with all my heart.\n\nThey also love to point out my pimples and \"butch\" haircut (I do have a pixie cut) and overall teenage weirdness.\n\nI'm really bitter about it and it would be great if you guys could give me some tips on how to confront them. Thank you so much in advance.", "summary": "People around me constantly make negative comments about my appearance. Getting sick of it, please offer suggestions on how to confront."}
{"id": "t3_l1elf", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "I'm in trouble for painting rage faces on our homecoming club windows", "post": "So heres the story. Every year for homecoming our school paints windows for clubs, after school activities, sports etc. My friends and I thought it would be funny to put a me gusta face on the boys sport page and a f7u12 face on theirs (like they're frustrated by us copying their design, which we did, and such).\n\nHere's the thing. One of the girls didn't think it was funny, and I was called into the office. They see it as me saying \"Fuck you\" to the girls team, and saying \"I like\" to the boys team. Hence, that we're better than the girls. That is TOTALLY not what I was aiming for.\nWhat should I do reddit? I go in tomorrow to talk to the people in the office. I've already explained that they don't have negative connotations, and that I absolutely meant no harm. I'm a good student, and I'vd never done anything bad. I'm just applying to colleges, and I don't want this to be seen as negative on my applications or anything. They're seeing it as graffiti or vandalism!\n\nHelp me out here, reddit!", "summary": "I'm in trouble for putting rage faces on our school spirit windows, they take it as me saying \"Fuck you\" to the girls."}
{"id": "t3_3ce96a", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "My Tinder experience so far [21 M] [Asian] [First date]", "post": "Hey what's up ladies and gents, \n\nSo pretty much, I'm back at my home town for the summer and had my first tinder date (first date ever) yesterday night so it was pretty monumental (; I unfortunately don't have as many female friends as I would like to hang out with so I figured I would give a tinder a spin.  \n\nI don't know if other normal looking asian guys go through this or I'm just butt ugly, its whatever but I probably get a match or two on the daily if I'm lucky and that is if I use all my likes. But I match with this one girl on the second day on the app and was able to see meet with her that weekend. And yeah, she didn't turn out to be a psycho or anything and she was actually pretty chill(she drinks and smokes occasionally with a college degree/job). We didn't hit it off right away, but after a few drinks we were able to expand and talk about life a bit more. We had dinner and took off to sight see and it became a pretty lame 8th bench date type of thing since I really didn't know how to escalate but it was still chill. She told me and I could tell that she was an avid tinder user so I was a little intimidated since this being my first time out and all. I don't know if she was bored at all or just wanted to hook up but I had a pretty good experience either way. Dropped her back off and was back on my way. This sound like a typical exchange on tinder or did I majorly fuck up in some way?\n\nHow many matches do you asian brothers get typically?", "summary": "Never went on a date before and met a girl on tinder. Didn't do anything with her but I still left with a 'I just benched press the world' smile on my face."}
{"id": "t3_1v87y1", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 M] with my wife [27 F] duration 10 years, Need help to make our 10th Valentines day perfect", "post": "My wife and I met 10 years ago in college. Since then I've joined the army and been away a lot more than we expected, we've got a kid who is a low functioning autistic, we've had lots of struggles and managed to somehow stay together without killing each other.\n\nOne problem though is I've never been home for valentines day. I've always been away for work or dealing with some crisis or another (dodged the bullet this year, not leaving until the day after valentines day.)\n\nI'm the only one out of both of us who has a job and with a disabled kid life can get expensive, but I'd like to try to plan the perfect valentines day for the two of us. Problem is I'm not very creative and on a pretty tight budget. The only thing I know is I want to leave her some notes around the house leading up to V day and then I plan on taking her out for a Sushi dinner. That's all I've got so far.\n\nAny ideas from anyone? Help?", "summary": "I'm useless at valentines day but it's our 10th year together and our first year that I'll actually be home. I'm not creative! Help!"}
{"id": "t3_4m1cyy", "subreddit": "Advice", "title": "Boss told me I was going to be fired, but haven't heard anything since.", "post": "Throwaway just in case.\n\nLet me preface this by saying I understand why this company would fire me. I know it's nothing personal. I've worked here for two years, and lately I've been getting a little burnt out, so I hit a bit of a lazy streak. Totally understandable; no issues with that.\nMy issue is that on Saturday, my immediate supervisor pulled me into his office, and to make a long story short, told me he had to start the process of termination due to my recent work performance. Tough to swallow, but fair. I messed up.\n\nThat was the only thing I heard about it on Saturday, and we are closed Sunday.\n\nOn Monday, Memorial Day in the US, I asked my supervisor if he had any updates on the situation for me (apparently some kind of form has to be sent to corporate, they sign/approve it or whatever, then send it back and you clean off your desk). He said because of the holiday, no one is at corporate. He also said that his supervisor, the GM, was waiting to hear back from someone.\n\nThat was the last I heard of it on Monday.\n\nOn Tuesday, I came to work not really knowing if I had a job or not. I came in, did my work, acted normal. I asked my supervisor via text if he had an update. No response. I know he saw the text, though, his phone is always with him and he has one of those smart watches. He saw it. Never hearing anything, I finished out my shift and went home.\n\nIt's Wednesday, and here I am at the job I was told I'm getting fired from.\n\nI've never been fired from a job before. Is this normal? Do I just wait it out? Is what they're doing (telling me I'm going to get fired and not following through) normal?", "summary": "My boss told me I was getting fired, hasn't done it, and won't answer my questions regarding the matter."}
{"id": "t3_4un3dg", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Me [27 F] with my boyfriend [24 M] for four months now, he talks very slow.", "post": "I don't know how to ask this without it sounding really silly, but this is a genuine problem. I created a throwaway because of too much personal detail in my main account. \n\nMy boyfriend and I are both grad students and have been together for four months now. I absolutely love him. He's sweet, caring, tolerant, liberal, basically every single thing on my 'checklist', if I had one, is there. \n\nThe problem, though, is he talks VERY slowly. I mean his speed is really slow. If I ask him anything, he takes about 3 seconds before he starts to talk, then when he starts, the words go at a very slow pace,and he even pauses for 3-5 seconds in the middle of his sentence. I get really impatient and sometimes just feel like telling him to hurry up (of course I don't, but I really feel like doing so). \n\nI asked him today, very gently, why he spoke so slow, and he said he just gets thoughts very slowly in his brain. He then went on to say he's just generally slow at thinking. I felt really sad when he said this, I don't know why. He's a Math PhD student,and we are at a pretty good school, and his research has been going slow for a while now (but this is totally normal in grad school), so I think that response was kind of a self-deprecating one since he's already low on self-esteem. \n\nAnyway, my point is, his speed of talking is just a part of him, it can't be changed. I love him so much otherwise but I just want to know how to deal with this. Conversation is so important in a relationship! How do we manage? He's an introvert and talks very little in general; I suspect this has something to do with his pace of talking?", "summary": "Boyfriend of four months who's otherwise fantastic, has a very slow pace of talking, and I feel impatient talking to him. How do I deal with this situation?"}
{"id": "t3_hb3an", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Deja Vu? What do you think it means?", "post": "The science of Deja Vu isn't really cut and paste a lot of it is still speculation. Just a few days ago I had a very strange case of Deja Vu. I was at a bar I had never been to, in a city I had never been to with friends I just met for the first time that week. Then all of a sudden it hit me, the situation, the setting, the atmosphere, the lights, the sounds, the ambiance, everything seemed like that moment in time had occurred for me before.\n\nSo I ask, what do you think Deju Vu means? To me, I think it is a sign that your life is on the path it is intended to be on. That you are heading in the right directions. Kinda like a butterfly effect. You always start at point A and you always end at point B. But the way you get there is up to you, and there is a right path for you to take and there is the wrong path for you to take. Not morally, but just the way that your life is \"Suppose\" to go.", "summary": "What does Deja Vu mean to you? To me it's a sign that things are on track in your universe."}
{"id": "t3_ki2tw", "subreddit": "AskReddit", "title": "Hopefully someone can clarify this car insurance situation I have. Is it supposed to work like that?", "post": "First of all, i got into a car accident like 4 months ago while my sister's friend (lets call her Kim) was in the passenger sit. I made a U-turn and while i saw car was coming but i guess i was wrong and i got hit from the back while about to get into my lane. My car was totaled after sniping out of control and Kim (I must say, i think she's a total brat and i highly dislike her but my sister begged me to take her to her house, so i did) ended up in the hospital to get stitches in her head. I felt fucked up as well but i was too scared and too busy panicking to think about anything else. The police report said that it was neutral fault. Well here's the thing i don't understand. Kim ended with a check of 10,000 to pay for her hospital bills while i ended up having to buy another car at my expense and my insurance went up. They gave her a check and i'm pretty sure she wasted all the money already without paying the hospital bill yet. Why does it work like that?", "summary": "Got in a car accident, my passenger ended with a check of 10,000 to pay for her hospital bills while i ended up having to buy another car at my expense and my insurance went up."}
{"id": "t3_q8ro1", "subreddit": "loseit", "title": "After only one week of changing my diet, it's insane (in a good way)", "post": "I come from a family that eats way too many carbs. I'm 17 years old, 6 feet tall, and 350lbs (159kg). Last week, I decided to make some big eating habit changes. **First**, was not snacking during the day. I only 3 eat meals a day, no snacks. **Second** is I'm cutting out a lot of carbs from my meals. My usual judgement at home is 40% of my daily carbs maximum for breakfast and lunch combined, and then I don't pat attention to the exact count for dinner, but I'm still mindful not to take additional carbs. **Third**, drinking primarily water and juice. I'm a big pop connoisseur, and I think that's one of my main problems.\n\nI've lost 5 pounds (2.25kg) in one week, and I don't need to eat nearly as much. Today, I had a Nutrigrain bar for breakfast at 6:30am, and a regular serving of popcorn chicken and an apple for lunch at 10:40am (I'm in the earliest lunch period at school). It's currently 5:45pm and I'm barely hungry.\n\nThis week, I'm gonna start doing cardio regularly: at least a mile of walking a day, whether around town or on a treadmill. I haven't been at a healthy weight since I was in 2nd grade, but I'm hoping to at least get closer to 200lbs (91kg) by September for when I go off to college.", "summary": "Lost 5lbs in a week just from cutting carbs, snacks, and soda. Not nearly as hungry, and starting to walk a mile a day this week."}
{"id": "t3_14yuod", "subreddit": "relationship_advice", "title": "[24/F] My boyfriend's friend [26/M] is maybe a little too friendly?", "post": "I have a boyfriend of.. I want to say maybe 3 months now. Relatively recently (within the past month or so) he introduced me to one of his closest friends. He's a man who's been in a relationship with a woman for the past 8 years. Within the time we've been introduced up until today, I've become fast friends with him, enough of one to the point where we have each others' phone numbers and IDs for various gaming stuff.\n\nFrom my past experience, and I realize it might be different for others depending on the situation, it's usually good to get along with your SO's friends, but I've never had someone like that send me so many messages throughout the day and want to do stuff with me. Moreso than my SO. Text messages all the time, game invites after work.. I just don't know what to think of it. His girlfriend also does these things, but it seems like he's excluding her almost every night. There's nothing sexual at all exchanged in the messages, but he does have a tendency to bring up a ton of inside jokes. Should I be worried?", "summary": "Boyfriend's friend (who's been in an 8-year relationship) is messaging me constantly and wanting to spend time with me almost every day at night... what gives?"}
{"id": "t3_2yfq9y", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Wife [35F, married 5yrs ago] wants me [44M] to have the \"Find a Friend\" tracking app on my phone, and I find it creepy.", "post": "Question for you: my wife (35F) recently (repeatedly) asked me (44M) to instal the \"Find a Friend\" app on my phone. For those who haven't heard of that app: it enables whoever you allow to track where you are at any time, set an alert if you are on the move, and has a few other features.\n\nHer reasoning: I often go (kite)surfing in remote locations and this way she'll know where I am in case of emergency. And she recently did a long Coastrek where I helped with support and she thought in hindsight that this app would have helped me find where she was.\n\nI'm a little creeped out by it. IMO my wife has insecurity and trust issues, and this is just a way for her to reassure herself that I'm not cheating on her whenever I work late etc.\n\nI've 'let her' instal it - for now, to give her the reassurances she seems to need. But I did voice my opinion on the matter, explaining that I perceive it to be a creepy little stalking tool that I can understand using on your teenage children's phone, but not on your husband. I told her to feel free to instal it but that I perceive it as her having trust issues, to which her response was that my 'defensive manner' was suspicious in itself.\n\nI asked if she knew of any other friends who use it (none), and who else she tracks on her Find a Friend app (only her brother).\n\nAs a side note and to provide context: we have been married for 5 years, have 2 kids and an almost barren sex life (which I gather is pretty normal for 'married with kids' couples) - which I think makes her insecure about my fidelity. And no; I'm not cheating on her. \n\nAm I handling this the right way? Any constructive advice welcomed.", "summary": "if your partner asked you to instal a tracker app on your phone so that he/she would know where you are at all times; would you? And if not: how would you handle it?"}
{"id": "t3_2131ig", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Relationship: Girlfriend (f21) came clean for cheating on me 3 times in her one year of dating me (m21)", "post": "A little background:\nI've known this girl for a while and we have dated about a year now for the second time and I have been very serious about her.\n\nThere was a guy that led her on before we dated and used her for sex. I knew it was recent when we started dating again but I was hoping she would be able to move past him since she was with me. She promised that she would never speak to him again.\n\nOne year later she decided that she needed to tell me that she had had sex with him 3 days in to our relationship. I asked her questions about it and we talked for a while.\n\nHonestly I didnt think it was too big of a deal and, although I was disappointed and had less trust for her I had forgiven her. I asked if that was the entire story and if anything else ever happened and she swore that was all.\n\nThe next night at a bar we got on the subject again and after some serious probing she admitted that she had also invited him over while I was at work and \"he had sex with her while she 'froze'\" about six months ago. Twice that month he came over and \"had sex with her\"\n\nI left her and she has been begging ne to come back. I've explained to her that I dont can't possibly trust her anymore. I am young and dont need someone like this in my life no matter how much I care for them. \n\nShe shows genuine remorse and has said she is willing to do anything to make things right, i am just sick of being lied to. \n\nShe is a great girlfriend and I wanted the world with her but is it worth it to go back?\n\nShould I allow her an opportunity to make up for this or attempt to gain my trust again? \nIs it wrong for me to hate her and stay away from my life? Does she get credit for coming clean or still hiding things?\n\nAlso, she decided to tell me these things because she didnt want to feel guilty since I had just agreed to move to Oklahoma with her so she can go to school there.", "summary": "GF admitted she cheated on me once and then twice more. Thinks she deserves for me to stick around after showing remorse"}
{"id": "t3_3vy8xu", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "Is my bf(M26) behaviour validated towards me (F26) after I made a foolish mistake?", "post": "Background: I (F26) Have been in a relationship with my bf (M26) for 10 years. I currently stay at his parents house with him and I have a part-time job, he works full-time. \n\nToday I was suppose to attend an assessment for a job in another city but I didn't go as I felt doubtful about enjoying the job so I missed the assessment. This was a mistake and a terrible reason to not attend a job assessment. I currently work part-time and need a full-time job so not going to this assessment was just childish and wrong. I feel guilty and bad about not going and beat myself up over it. I will not do this again. \n\nMy bf was extremely disappointed with me (expectingly so) but also very angry I made that decision. I already feel stupid for not going and it was a mistake but my boyfriend has decided to react with calling me names and making me feel terrible for it. \n\nHe had work at 2pm and I told him this news around 8am. By 1pm I asked why he was still angry with me and he responded with ' Im not angry cos I dont give a shit about you any more'. This made me feel horrible. \n\nBefore leaving for work, I told him I already feel like shit for it and he responded to this with ' you should feel like shit cos you are a piece of shit\". He has told me I am a waste of space, time and money and that I am pathetic. Today I have felt extremely depressed and worthless all day because of his reaction, as well as for the mistake of not attending that assessment. \n\nIs his reaction validated? Should he be behaving like this? I can understand he will feel disappointed with me but I feel it is too extreme.", "summary": "I foolishly didnt attend a job assessment and feel horrible for it, bf responds with extreme anger and makes me feel worthless for my mistake and calls me names. Is this justified?"}
{"id": "t3_3srds5", "subreddit": "relationships", "title": "23F and 23M bf/gf on different relationship stages, this normal?", "post": "Hi, I [23F] have been been dating this guy [23M], I am his first girlfriend, for soon to be 3 months and we are on different relationship stages. He is still in the honeymoon stage, where everything about your partner is perfect (not complaining, just surprised). I on the other hand have already passed that, probable because I am a single mother; idk okay). I kinda assumed that he had moved on due to some awkward moments.\n\nWe are on the same page as to what we are doing with the relation by talking about what we want; i.e. taking it slow by not meeting the parents, no major holiday being shared, or sex until month 5-6 (was not a one sided decision and I compromised; wanted to wait until marriage this time). \n\nSo what I want to know is this normal and just not talked about or no.? Should I even be asking at this point.", "summary": "Is it normal for a couple to be on different relationship stages i.e. honeymoon and none-honeymoon (reality?)"}